#trauma and instinct and all that

[yaralulu]

i love torturing eris in my fic by continuously mentioning just how much he looks like beron. like yes his father is the worst man alive and he has his face. yes beron’s gone and yet he’s there looking back at him every time he looks in the mirror. yes he’s now high lord and he’s wearing his father’s crown and he’s sitting on his throne and he looks just like him. he can’t escape him even in death 😄.

[daddyduncan69]

honestly? renee fucking walker does not get enough love.

[jinxed-sinner]

Look I know Lucifer isn't the best dad ever but I feel like people who say he's a bad dad are purposely ignoring the context of the show. It is very much implied that he thought Charlie wanted nothing to do with him, and Charlie thought he wanted nothing to do with her. Lucifer’s still dealing with trauma from Heaven and his fall and probably will for the rest of time plus he's dealing with what would probably qualify as clinical depression, and simultaneously dealing with trauma, clinical depression, and autistic traits (which Lucifer absolutely has; I do not say, as an autistic person, that Lucifer is a massive autistic mood for no reason) is a fucking NIGHTMARE.

I'm not saying Lucifer shouldn't take responsibility. He should. But he's already doing better than my dad frankly. Lucifer hits me in the daddy issues, I wish my dad made an effort to be more active in my life. Lucifer is fucking trying, and that's better than a lot of people can say about their dads.

[furiousgoldfish]

Without the abuse, I wouldn't have been this scared in every human interaction. I wouldn't feel like my life depends on saying the right thing and finding my way out of this situation safely. I wouldn't be this timid, this cagey, reluctant, imagining every worst scenario that can come out of a social situation. I wouldn't have images of torture in my mind when attempting to say no. I wouldn't find it this hard to refuse being useful to others when it violates my freedom.

I would be able to speak my mind. I'd be able to be honest in my own way, instead of finding reasons and reasons why I have to be as pleasant and non-demanding as possible. I wouldn't be afraid to ask for information when I want it. I wouldn't be scared to check what my options are.

Abuse forces me to walk the thinnest line of being convenient and nothing else. I don't get to have a personality, there's only fear. I'm different when I'm alone, I'm not afraid, I know what I want. But if you put another human being next to me, all of my convictions are overwritten by survival instinct to appease and escape.

[angeart]

My brain keeps going back to the hhau rambles and Grian asking Scar about taking his wings off and just...how incredibly short-sighted that "fix" would be. Because like, even if he lost one/both his wings and lived through it....he'd still have his instincts. He'd still chirp...he'd still wanna be high up in nests but he'd have to climb now. He'd never be able to wrap himself in wings again... depending on when that earring of Scar's might be the last of his feathers... and oh gosh post rescue? The hermits seeing him without wings and all the questions and looks of pity. Some well meaning hermit maybe brings him an elytra which he's never needed before and oh that could cause a spiral

-🎀

oh gosh. oh okay. i see you're bringing angst to my doorstep.

grian definitely wasn't thinking clearly in that moment. he simply reached a point where he can't see any other solution. so much of his anguish is tied to his wings. he's in pain and scared and he desperately wants it to stop.

he's learned to despise his wings. they cause him so much turmoil and everything that was ever good about them—everything he loved—has been meticulously erased. they're not pretty. they are dirty and grimy and itchy. heavy, unwieldy, muscles locked up, clumsy and aching from disuse. they no longer feel like a proper part of him. he's not using them, he's just constantly fighting to tuck them away. to make the world believe they're not there.

well then... wouldn't it be easier? if that was the reality?

to him, it sounds like a long-term solution to an otherwise never-ending problem.

his wings are a beacon, and wouldn't him and scar be so much safer without them? if he didn't have them, there'd be no reason for people to madly hunt him. maybe then they could stop running and catch their breath. maybe then scar wouldn't be in constant danger just from being near him. maybe then the fear lodged into grian's spine and the endless string of triggered panic attacks would finally go away.

yes, he'd still have his instincts. but he's already grounded. he's already not using his wings for any sort of comfort at this point, and flight is not an option. he's craving nests and high places, but that doesn't mean he can get them, wings or no wings, and— he was fine without that on hermitcraft! surely if the pain and fear stop, his instincts will calm down? surely, he can get at least a semblance of control back?

and you need to realise. there was no thought spared to the hermits. at this point, scar and grian have given up and no longer expect or even hope to ever be rescued. in their minds, there's no one coming to save them. there's no home to go back to. it's just this.

it will always be this.

and this is painful, and grian is clawing at ideas of making it better somehow—anyhow—no matter how drastic or gruesome that option might seem.

that all being said... man. that big what if. what if he really lost them? what if, one way or another, he managed to get rid of his wings? what if that happened and he survived?

your point about how scar's earring would be the last of grian's feathers is so heartrending. that'd be so tragic and sad.

and then post-rescue, the hermits would have even more proof of the damage. even more questions, too. even more helplessness as how to help, when the damage done is long since unfixable </3

grian, having to wrangle with having a safe environment to fly again, but having no wings to fly with... especially if that was his own choice. if it was preventable. ouch.

[smilesrobotlover]

Whumptober day 15- makeshift bandages

Sorry I’m a little late, I slept in fhsksbkssbsk. Anyways this one is kinda silly, idk what I’m doing with whumptober but I’ve had this idea in my head where Legend meets the dads so here’s this silly lil thing dbsksbsksbk.

Warning for a bloody stab wound.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Legend stared out at the ocean, listening to the waves as they crashed against the beach he was on. He breathed in the salty breeze, several old memories flooding his mind from the smell and sounds. He had mixed feelings about the ocean. On one hand, it reminded him of the pain and loss he had to endure, but on the other hand, he had the best memories at the beach. Whenever he got overwhelmed he would try to find a beach area to unwind, occasionally humming his song…

He was lucky that he was close enough to a beach in this world. The other heroes were great, but they would always burst into arguments and overwhelm Legend. In order to keep himself from getting riled up, he’d walk away, and so he found a beautiful beach to think about all that’s happened to him. He stared out at the horizon, watching the land across from him. But something was strange about it when he really studied it. He narrowed his eyes and noticed that there was a boat traveling to where he was.

A boat?

If Legend recalled correctly, they were the only ones here. So who was on that boat? And why were they heading towards them? He stood up and watched the boat closely. He didn’t know what that was, but he might as well figure it out before it got too close. Legend took off his clothes and took a deep breath, praying that no one could see him now, and he jumped into the water. He felt the familiar magic twisting his bones around and fusing his legs together into a beautiful pink fish tail, and he pushed against the water towards the boat. When he got close he kept his distance, but stared at the bottom of the boat. He didn’t know what he was expecting, he couldn’t see the people on the boat so he didn’t know if they were a threat. He circled the boat for a little bit, finally popping out of the water to get a good look at the people onboard. He only saw one person, but from what he could tell, they weren’t a monster. Was that the puppeteer? Legend narrowed his eyes, but he couldn’t see the person very clearly. Truthfully he didn’t know what the puppeteer looked like. But he was from either Sheikah, Hylian, or Gerudo from what he heard, so he should be on this boat, right?

The person Legend was watching suddenly looked at him, and Legend quickly dove back into the water, panicking. He wasn’t supposed to be seen.

Legend quickly swam underneath the boat, trying to head back to shore to report on what he saw. Just when he was out in the open, a sharp pain went through his tail, and he let out a scream. Legend sunk to the ocean floor as his tail throbbed, and he looked at it to see a spear straight through his tail. Blood was mixing in with the water, and the pain was so bad that he couldn’t move his tail. He quickly reached for the spear, trying to gather up the courage to pull it out, but the pain was too much. A shadow went over him, and Legend noticed that the boat was on top of him. They’re after him, he thought in horror. He was going to get captured and possibly tortured for information on the other heroes, or he was going to get murdered for being a mermaid or for being a hero or something. He needed to get out now, but he couldn’t move his tail, he was stuck. He turned and saw a net coming towards him, and he gasped as he was scooped off the ocean floor, his tail throbbing as he folded up in the net. The net pulled up quickly, and Legend broke the surface coughing.

“Let me go! Let me go!” He started yelling as the net pulled him closer to the boat. He weakly punched the air, trying to land a hit on his captors.

“Woah woah woah! Hey it’s ok, it’s ok!” He heard a man yell out, and he was cut free from the net and was carried out gently, which surprised Legend. Was he not a captive?

Legend let out a yelp when he slipped out of the man’s hold, and he fell to the ground harshly. He heard the man curse under his breath and he was leaned up against him.

“Nice going Rusl.”

“I didn’t think he’d be so slippery!”

“He’s part fish, what did you expect?”

“I—I don’t know! Leave me alone!”

Legend looked up at the man he was leaned up against, who he assumed was named Rusl. He had dirty blonde hair that reached to the middle of his neck, with some scruffy facial hair on his chin and an interesting mustache around his mouth. He had light blue eyes and had a gentle expression when he looked down at Legend. He frowned apologetically and rubbed Legend’s arm.

“That got you good,” he muttered, looking at Legend’s injured tail, where another man with reddish-blonde hair looked over. “How… how does it look, Leon?”

Leon gave Rusl a look before returning to his tail.

“Well, the spear went right through his tail so, I can’t imagine it’s anything good,” he answered, grabbing the spear which caused Legend to whimper. “Linebeck, look away,” he said, and Legend noticed a tall man with dark brunette hair turn away, looking nauseous. Rusl held onto Legend’s hand as Leon broke the spear in half, pulling it through his tail. Legend hissed at the pain and felt his tail go numb.

“Hey Leon, did you ever consider that doing that would cause splinters?” A very short man who looked a lot like Hyrule stepped up, staring at the broken spear concerned.

“He’ll be fine.”

“Not if he has splinters.”

“He’ll be fine.”

Legend gulped and looked at his bleeding tail, feeling dizzy from the sight as Leon put pressure on the wound. He felt the magic twisting through his legs and he groaned in pain as his tail split back into two legs. Leon yelped at the sight, throwing his red cape over Legend before continuing to deal with his legs.

“Woah,” he heard Rusl mumble at the sight. “You can turn into a… fish?”

Legend let out a pained breath, smiling at the kind man. “A mermaid.”

“I see. I’ve never heard of mermaids before…”

“Yeah, well, I’m not really a mermaid, it’s just an item that I use whenever I get into water.”

Rusl stared at him blankly, and Legend chuckled at his confusion.

“It’s weird I know.”

Rusl smiled as Leon sat up and turned behind him. “Oy, Talon,” he called out, “bring me some bandages!”

“We don’t have any bandages!” He heard the man named Talon yell back. He sounded like he was inside the boat.

“Then bring me something that can be used as a bandage for Din’s sake!”

“Ok ok, don’t cuss at me!”

Legend took a deep breath, trying not to pass out from the pain and the blood, and Rusl rubbed his arm again.

“I’m so sorry about this,” he mumbled, and Legend waved it away.

“It’s ok, thank you for taking care of me—“ Legend was interrupted when he saw a man walk up to Leon with bandages. He felt his heart stop when he nearly recognized him, and he sat up, almost hitting Rusl’s chin with his head. “T-Tarin?” He blurted out, and the man looked at him in surprise. He looked behind him and looked back with confusion plastered on his face.

“Are ya talkin’ to me?” He asked, and Legend felt disappointment and embarrassment when he realized that he was definitely not Tarin. His hair was thinning at the top, his facial hair connected all the way to his sideburns, and his blue eyes did not match Tarin’s dark brown eyes. Legend looked down, tears uncontrollably welling up.

“I-I’m so s-sorry—I thought you were someone else,” he stammered.

“Oh, it’s ok kid, no harm done,” Talon said softly, handing a shirt to Leon. While Leon tore the shirt apart and began wrapping his leg, Legend stared at Talon. He had such a kind face, and now that he was looking at him more, he was looking a lot like his uncle. A lump formed in his throat and he looked away.

“So, uh, what’s your name?” Talon asked, breaking the silence.

“I’m Link,” Legend said without thinking. He probably should’ve kept his identity a secret, but these men were all so kind that he didn’t think about it. Leon froze and looked at him intensely.

“You’re Link? Are you traveling with other Links?”

“Um…” Legend stopped himself this time. They were all looking for the group… was it smart to say yes? “I… uh… I don’t know.”

“… you don’t know?”

“Uh… well I…” Legend looked around, panic beginning to bubble up in his chest. Rusl cleared his throat and Legend looked up at him.

“We’re only asking because we’re looking for our respective Links,” he explained. “Y’see, my son is Link, and most of us here also have a son named Link, we were hoping that our Links would all be together.”

Legend narrowed his eyes. Rusl’s son was Link? Which Link was he the father to? He honestly looked nothing like them. Not to mention his ears were rounded, not pointed. Was his son Sky? Sky had very small ears, but so did Warriors, maybe Warriors was his son…

“Hey,” Leon interrupted Legend’s thoughts. “It’s a simple question, are you traveling with Links?”

“Leon he’s overwhelmed, be patient with him,” Talon muttered, and Leon sighed.

“I-I’m sorry, Link,” he muttered, and Legend smiled.

“Hey, it’s ok. Who’s your son?”

Leon sat up straight, a hopeful gleam in his eye. “Um, his name is also Link… and uh… he has long blonde hair, he’s kind of braided it on one side though, and he’s very young…”

Legend hummed. “That sounds like Four.”

Leon nearly jumped up at that, causing Talon to yelp slightly.

“Four? As in the Four sword?”

“Uh, y-yes. We had to give each other nicknames so… he’s known as Four, mostly ‘cause of his eyes but also because of his four sword.”

Leon smiled slightly, then looked down. “He’s alright?”

“Last time I checked, yeah. He’s safe and sound.”

Leon sat back, running a hand through his hair, looking relieved. Legend smiled and sat up away from Rusl.

“Really, all the Links I’m traveling with are fine. I’m sure they’d be happy to see you.”

The men all made different sounds of relief at that, but Legend couldn’t help but notice the Linebeck man watching him strangely. Leon finished tying his bandages and gave his knee a pat.

“We'll take you inside, and maybe we’ll find you some clothes you can put on.”

Legend wrapped the red cape around him tighter in embarrassment. “Um… it’s ok my clothes are all on the beach.”

“Whatever you’re comfortable with,” Leon said, standing up. “Ok Linebeck you’re safe to look.”

“No, no you are not safe to look, Linebeck. There’s blood everywhere,” The short brown haired man stopped the tall man.

“Oh come on, his leg isn’t bleeding,” Leon muttered.

“There’s still blood everywhere!”

Legend chuckled at the men bantering, they reminded him of his own group. Rusl gave a small sigh and pulled Legend closer to him.

“Let me take you inside then,” he said softly. “I am… so sorry about this.”

Legend wrapped his arms around his neck as he was lifted off the ground. “Hey, it’s ok. I’m sure it wasn’t your fault anyways.”

Legend heard the others snort.

“No it was definitely his fault,” Leon said.

“I said that I saw a mermaid,” Linebeck started up, “and Rusl wasted no time to grab a spear and chuck it into the water.”

“He was so fast I didn’t have time to process what was going on!” The short brunette chuckled.

“He has a good aim I must admit.” Legend saw a different man with strikingly blue eyes leaning against a strange bird man. “It’s not easy to throw spears into the water, I’ve definitely tried.”

Rusl looked down ashamed. “Guys, enough.”

Talon picked up on his mood and stood up. “Alright y’all, let Rusl put Link inside. Leave him alone.”

The other men stopped and Rusl quickly turned to enter the inside of the boat. Legend watched him quietly as he was settled down in a bed. Rusl grabbed some blankets and set them down on top of Legend, and before he could leave, Legend grabbed his arm.

“Hey… it’s ok,” he said firmly. Rusl stared at him for a moment but smiled.

“Get some rest. We’ll get you once we reach the beach.”

Legend nodded and watched as Rusl left the bottom deck. He sighed and laid down, happily letting himself get rest.

[crimeronan]

back to thinking about princess AU luz and hunter being kids together since my entire dash right now is dirt-covered toddler corpse boy. the current thoughts being to wonder exactly how six-year-old hunter reacted to belos bringing home this weird little creature. i think hunter probably had the capacity even then to intuit that belos was treating luz with significantly more paternal affection than he'd ever shown hunter. and in a lot of kids, this kind of blatant favoritism and neglect would engender jealousy. but instead of being jealous, tiny six-year-old hunter is just Very Very Very Afraid. and doesn't know why. and doesn't even really understand that he's afraid, because he's six and has been raised by a puritan with the emotional intelligence of a flea.

all of this is to say: i don't think belos even formally told hunter to look after luz, or at least not until they were slightly older. but hunter would have followed him and luz & watched their interactions from a corner, like, unblinking autism creature style. and whenever belos Wasn't with luz, hunter would Continue watching her autism creature style, just to make sure nobody nothing bad happened to her. not that he'd have any reason to think anything bad might happen to her. because everything happening with the three of them is super normal

little guard.

[vickyvicarious]

She is in gay spirits and full of life and cheerfulness. All the morbid reticence seems to have passed from her, and she has just reminded me, as if I needed any reminding, of that night, and that it was here, on this very seat, I found her asleep.

Yesterday, Dracula's boxes were delivered at last to his Carfax estate in London. Presumably, the Count went along with them. That was his plan from the first, after all.

Today, for the first time, Lucy talks about what happened to her. And not in a single thoughtful murmur to herself while possibly in a trance/flashback... she brings it up to Mina. The way she does so seems like she's trying to make light of a very frightening experience, but she's able to give details when asked. She is willing to talk further despite being disturbed by the memories. The morning after Dracula leaves, while sitting over the spot where he once

It's almost as though, with the Count gone, Lucy is released from some kind of magical compulsion to be silent.

[huginsmemory]

Maybe it's cause I almost religiously listen to glass animals album I Love You So F**king Much and am rotating Bill and Ford in my brain at immense speeds but I think some of the songs on it are very Billford. Wonderful Nothing is a BIG canon Bill song about Ford to me. Like FUCK.

It's about loving someone but being ultimately self-destructive and unable to save your relationship because you choose to continue to hurt them due to loving yourself most EVEN while still desperately loving the person. Like hnnngh LISTEN!!! Listen to ittt. PLUS ADDED SOME PERTINENT LYRICS BELOW THE CUT.

Wonderful nothing You just want something nice You just want substance I just wanna cut out both your eyes

Wonderful nothing You just want something kind I want corruption I think I'm the devil in disguise

Here's my state of mind Give me destruction Tell me I'm scrumptious I'm a fucking delight

I come back in with a one-two Sucker punch in the gut, here's a tissue Truth hurts when it points right at you ... I've just come back to life I'm here, I'm your little ray of sunshine

Your party's so damn tired Kinkiness pretty light and You're dressed up like a tiger But you're a fly stuck in my eye, and

What's that face? So you got some scrapes, but I'll pile drive you anyway And I hoped and I prayed I kept on thinking it'd all change one day

It's been a great gun fight You drew blood, I set myself on fire But you've had your time Oh, you've had your time, mm

Wonderful nothing I just want something wrong I want indulgence I just want to make it out alive

... You got big ideas, they're as shit as you Trying to self-combust just for an excuse

I'm the fly inside of your facial goop I'm a little hair sat inside your soup There's the rub, maybe I'm the fool I'm trying to stop, but I still love you

[scarefox]

This episode they really showed how Uea wants sex to distract himself to make the bad feelings go away for a while and King is the only safe option (not the best way of coping maybe atm but it gets better). Hope they will make him talk about it because I feel many in the audience still don’t understand the link between sex and comfort and coping especially for an abuse victim who always turns to it after triggering events (still think this part is more about the mom, cause whenever the stepdad is part of the trigger he can’t have sex or cuddles ... at least can’t enjoy it as we have seen in this episode). Shortly said, an orgasm gives you dopamine, and it’s all your mind and body focuses on in that moment. Reasons why this could end up in an addiction under the wrong circumstances. Under the right ones it can be therapeutic and have an antidepressant effect.

Uea is a bit torn with King. The caring side of King is an unexpected surprise for him every time. He doesn't really expect kindness from people. But he's glad whenever he receives it from people he trusts. Which King became a part of way too fast for Uea to admit (he’s a player after all). That’s why he rarely shows King his smiles when he’s fond of him. I think the cake scene was one of the rare moments he truly showed him this kind of vulnerability to him (him being truly happy, it’s a delicate feeling easily snatched away under his circumstances). He also took a long time to even understand that King really means it, that this birthday cake is really for him because King really wants to make him happy and he’s allowed to take it. I wonder if the little cake fight and unceremonial bite into the cake is an emotional defense from Uea to not get too deep into vulnerable emotions and turn it into fun / silly & sexy moment instead while still keeping the good vibe.

He’s not ready for an emotional bond with him yet when they clearly stated from the beginning this will just be about sex and they don’t even like each other (we all know that’s a lie). I suspect Uea has trust issues as well since his stepdad always acts nice, caring and misunderstood... so Uea needs a while to learn if people really mean it or if they just want something from him.

I bet that will become a big issue at some point, when they both think the other has no feelings while they secretly do have feelings. I fear Uea will push King away for a while when their feelings get clearer.

[thesolarsurfer]

Well, I once again tripped and fell into a prior hyperfixation. This time it was the often forgotten RPG, Megaman X: Command Mission. Mostly just about how neat the introductory cinematic is and also the bizarrely similar organization names in the English translation. And uhhhh whoops my hand slipped. Have a ficlet set just after the end of the tutorial area after that dramatic fall off a seaside cliff.

X awoke, silently and completely still, scanning the room and consolidating his fragmented memory cache up until the point of impact. Finding the room secure and occupied by a single non-combat reploid, he engaged his running lights and activity protocols, fans and gyros whirring to life as he sat up quickly and looked around as though for the first time. "Where am I? Who are you?"

The green and khaki reploid startled and swiveled its head around immediately, the rest of its body following suit in stages. He seemed harmless enough, with all of the indicators of a light-duty standard build and an updated transponder flagging him as maintenance staff. "Oh! You're awake. Welcome back, Mr. X. Well, I guess welcome for the first time to the Resistance HQ and welcome back to consciousness. You suffered some pretty serious damage there before we picked you up. I'm pretty sure I got you put back together correctly, though I must admit I've never worked on a system as old as yours. I sure am glad you include an instruction manual!"

X tightened his focus on the reploid's stance, assessing any signs of hostility or subtle signals to backup out of his own perception. There was nothing, no indication this was anything but a polite chat between allies. "The Resistance? Why would you-?" X started, servos in his wrist swiveling to shorten the delay between his fist clenching and converting to its buster configuration for a fight. The subroutine parsing the conversation for potential codewords and subterfuge flagged an inconsistency he had overlooked in his haste. "Right, no, Epsilon is the leader of the Rebellion. You said you're with the...?"

"The Resistance. We're resisting the occupation of Epsilon's forces after the coup he staged."

"Resistance, not Rebellion. Right. You all really could have picked a clearer name"

"We could be the Republicans? Since we support the world republic that Epsilon is trying to overthrow?"

"None of us are Irish enough to pull that off"

"...Sir?"

"Kids these days. Ancient history, don't mind me. Point is you aren't the ones building a super weapon to conquer the planet"

"Nope, no super weapons here. We're just an isolated island nation with minimal contact with the mainland. Which apparently makes this place a great location to buid a super weapon"

"Isolated is right. Getting here was certainly a hassle"

"Did they fly you out here in a bomber squadron? With reinforcements?"

"No, HQ used some low orbit platforms to deploy mobile teleporter platforms, which have since scuttled."

"So your ride here was one way only?"

"By design. We came here to put a stop to Epsilon's plans. Since we're dealing with a Maverick incident, this entire island is under quarantine. No one is leaving here without HQ's approval. We only get that after the Rebellion blockade is cleared and an investigation team confirms that there are no traces of the Maverick virus here."

"Wow, you all really take this stuff seriously. I thought so long as the mechaniloids and reploids working for Epsilon were taken down, everything would be fine."

"It's our job to be thorough. I've seen what happens when the Maverick virus escapes quarantine. Time and time and time and time and time and time again..."

"Hit your head a little harder than I thought, did you? You got stuck there, I think. That's a few too many times, isn't it?"

X stared, face pulled taut into an unreadable expression. It could be a grimace, if it weren't for every point of articulation being tensed into an uncanny imitation of neutrality. Small lights flickered in his head behind the lenses of his eyes, which were focused on a point some hundred meters behind the reploid speaking to him. The silence hung too long.

"...rrrrright. Um...I'm sure you're needed in the command room. Just follow the signs when you're ready, Mr. X."

[narwhalandchill]

btw if u equate childe and aventurines backstory in any fucking way please leave this blog and unfollow me <3 preferably block me while ur at it too uwu

[morningmask27]

I'm going to be bitching about Star for a while now. I'll tag them all with #asc spoilers, but really what the fuck was this book?

[jankwritten]

JASICO WEEK DAY 6: CROSSOVER

(OMG Check, Please! Crossover)

A puck ricochets off the boards and, like clockwork, the newbie drops. 

“That one didn’t even come close to him,” Percy mutters as he sweeps by on the ice, circling around behind the net. Nico’s shoulder twitches, though he doesn’t look. 

The newbie stays down. Coach Brunner squats beside him, putting a hand gingerly on his back. Newbie flinches. 

“He shouldn’t be playing if he can’t handle it,” Nico mutters, averting his eyes only when Newbie raises his head back up. 

Percy’s side-eye is a physical sensation on the side of his face. “He can get used to it. The season hasn’t even started yet, man, we gotta give him a chance.” 

That’s fucking bullshit. Nico tightens his grip on his stick and does not snap, because it’s not Percy’s fault their rookie is inept. Percy doesn’t deserve Nico’s outrage. He’s trying his best. 

Newbie’s shaking so bad, Coach has him go sit on the bench to calm back down. The rest of the team have started doing their drills in slow-motion, their heads all turned to stare at the incident. 

A distraction. The newbie is a fucking distraction, Nico can’t handle a distraction right now, not when Connor and Chris need to work out their passes, not when Charlie and Mike need to get their shit together in the defensive zones. 

Nico slams his stick blade-first into the ice, cracking silence through the dull buzz. Attention, fucking finally, turns back to him. 

“Focus on your work,” Nico says, as threatening as he can. “Are you going to be this distracted midgame? No? Didn’t fucking think so.” 

Activity resumes. Nico throws his mask back down over his face and does not meet Percy’s eyes, when he starts taking mean, hard-to-block shots. 

(Nico also does not look at Newbie, who put his head down again the second Nico’s stick hit the ice. Right now, that's not his fucking problem. If the guy can't get his goddamn head on right, Nico doesn't have the space to give two shits.)

TO BE CONTINUED...

[bigender-cowboy]

I just wanna hug my sister so bad dude im tweaking

[lesbiten]

biggest idiotic dog owner pet peeve is when their dog tries to maim someone elses dog or honestly any animal and the owner goes 'omg my dog was protecting me!!' your dog is fear reactive, probably forgot you existed in the moment, and just wanted to kill the thing to save its own life