#totally not drawing from personal experience. here. haha.
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shortly after this john misses his flipflop and lands with his heel straight on the scorching tarmac
#homestuck#hom3stuck#john egbert#dave strider#johndave#davejohn#pepsicola#admin draws#fanart#trying out adding the songs i listened to a lot while drawing in the header... haha#its hot out ok. it was very hot out when i was drawing this. much less so today.#i always go to post this when i dont have much to say... rats. ill probably edit the tags as always#anways daves paper white ass wears factor 100000 meanwhile john thought the melanin and spf 20 would protect him. he mad!#totally not drawing from personal experience. here. haha.
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20/10 stars little guy
#me (scrounging undetected autist whose ideal fashion sense is ''if i have to be seen at all: shrouded'') seeing encanto the other month.....#and on top of it all i LOVE slice of life. encanto being so focused on What It's About that there's so much of that + character / dynamic#also part of what i loved abt pixar luca. ppl like ''simple story but not a problem :)'' like YEAH thank god it's Also so slice of lifey#2021 what a year lol. though again i only Just saw encanto....tfw Studio Creative Control backs off a bit more than usual: Joy & Wonders#anyway i knew going in bruno wasn't an antagonist (fine if he was though b/c slay & b/c scapegoats can do whatever they want)#knew i'd love him b/c again Scapegoat shows up & i'm the Amazing Showstopping Totally Unique Never The Same gif on loop#but what a delight even beyond those expectations lol. love again how Focused the movie is on What It's About & Thee Points it makes#the Characters / Dynamics & the Metaphor & the plot stays right with all of that. the focus & importance re: thee scapegoats....#& bruno being disabled like whole layer of Yay Yay Yay spamming. that even when He's Back we're reminded he's not ''normal now'' or w/e#(i.e. presenting that as The Good Ending for the disabled outcast. vs just being embraced as part of the group again & accepted As He Is)#meanwhile was like hmm chat is there queercoding do we think? like is he queer: Yes. but is there coding? hmm#sure isn't cishet coded though. but i was also having the thought like fellas is it gay to [higher tenor tessitura or w/e] lol#made me go ''do i know this voice? ok do i know this name / face / actor? (i have never seen anything ever / bad w/names/faces/voices)''#indeed was like yeah haven't seen this; heard of this; seen it once ages ago no way i remember more than like 0.6 details#then from ''ohh haha I'm A Mammal That Cares....yeah i hear that'' to ''omg CHI-CHI RODRIGUEZ???? ;;0;;'' waaah fantastic revelation lmao#also the way Literal Future Seer ability was externalized to make it more wrangleable for plot is so impressive & fun & excellent#got a lot of [i like this thing i saw a lot] i got to say....guess i can do that w/the sideblog i made for one drawing i made last night#encanto 2021#bruno madrigal#also the way bruno is so Nervous + Hiding / Bold + Big Personality like yes ha ha ha Yes....tamped down as ''too much'' experience#also the [stuttering stumbling muttering mumbling] line: i fr nigh wept upon going back over a moment like what am i hearing here?#& realizing the answer was: it's bruno quietly stuttering a moment during this one line (& then (& then (& then)) i saw you) ;;;mm;;;#hang onnn....the first scapegoat who's driven off being Disabled is so real so ;m; that again they're like so he got Weirder; Okay ;;m;;#that we get jorge thumbs up nobody having an Aside to be like [ugh; this guy] or Anything. augh always have too much to say for 30 tags#fabric drape there sure not accurate but i was like okay if i try to really reference that i'm not getting this done tonight
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You should totally do like a how to draw Konig tutorial for one of ur daily sketches
Chibi or not
But u should totally do it
I neeeeeeeeed ur process
-🦥
notes below the cut - additional notes can be found in this post where I give art tips from my experience
daily König sketch with bonus content♥️‼️post is a little late but it’s due to the info dump below haha, anyways, he’s a little nervous
hi!! thanks for requesting a little “my process” thing - super happy to do one<3
I’ll be using these pieces of him that I’ve done to go over my notes - this is just how I go about drawing him. I’d definitely recommend also going through this post linked above too for additional info because a lot of it carries over!
I think the most important thing for me when drawing König is spacing out his hood ratios. I always start out by just drawing where his eyes and eyebrows are, then I draw the cut-outs around them. after that, I start the stitched neckline - that’s usually an eye hole’s width above his actual eyes, it gives a good allusion to where his forehead would be
they aren’t hard and fast rules I follow, more like a silent guideline that can be meddled with depending on the drawing. I usually follow them because, to me, it looks the best with how I draw him. it’s flexible - same with the sleeves, sometimes they end below his eye cut-outs, sometimes I cut them short and they’re higher
I thought I’d do a step-by-step for the hood folds because just info dumping all at once sounded confusing in my head
I start by just drawing lines down from the corners of his eye cut-outs, then I loosely draw a slanted line to show some bunching of the fabric. the slanted line is usually around where his collarbone would be
best way I can describe figure 2 is drawing folds in a ‘U’ shape. the fabric is falling from his head and ‘pooling’. the ‘U’ shape adds a little depth
miscellaneous little folds around the hem. they follow the way his hood rests, slanting downwards towards the center
if anything, just study how fabric falls and bunches up! a lot of drawing is looking at reference material to figure the ‘why’s and ‘what’s - “why do the folds bunch in certain areas?”, “why is fabric gathering in that area”, “what’s causing the fabric to move like that”, etc
lastly is his body, and as we know, I’m allergic to drawing clothing (read “lazy”). I actually really recommend looking at the post I linked above for this because, in the last figure, I show the Pinterest reference of the man who inspired my König’s body shape (and went into depth on using references)
for arms, in figure 1 and 2, you’ll see me draw an oval inside the bicep and forearm - those are just to add the allusion to muscle mass. if I don’t draw those ovals, to me, it looks a little flat. in figure 3 I go over his waistline because of course I do
I always account for a prominent rib cage line because I personally like drawing a more pronounced rib cage in general. after the ribcage, there’s a slight indent at the waist before it flares back out - that ‘flare out’ is the line for the Adonis belt. again, just personal preference, but I enjoy making the curves a little dramatic so they’re more pronounced and visually appealing to me
I don’t know how helpful that was but I hope I got some information across - uuh, even though I don’t draw his tactical gear and uniform that often the advice I can give is to just look at his model haha. the only gear that gives me a headache is his helmet, but even then I just bs my way through it
for chibi König I just shrink all his proportions and draw a stupid little t-shirt for his head<3 he doesn’t need to think, he’s just a cute little fella. I draw chibi König the way I would draw a puppy, make him look cute without a thought behind those eyes
for additional reference material here’s the link for my Pinterest - I have an absurd amount of reference material for you to browse through
hopefully this was slightly helpful?? I don’t know, as long as you get something out of this I’m happy
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yan! hiccup/reader/yan! dagur
I'm on season 4 of RTTE but I just can't help but think how interesting the dynamic between Yan!hiccup and Yan!dagur would be.
tw: yandere, yandere rivals, mentions of attempts of kidnapping, slightly stalk-ish hiccup (?), overprotective Dragur, possessiveness
Dagur is already such a troublesome and unbearable person. sorry not sorry, but seriously, that guy toyed with Hiccup and almost drowned him? such a menace but that's why we love him, haha.
pre RTTE is probably one of the wildest times for you to be in this love triangle. while it is actually so nice to be around Hiccup, discussing every simple thing you two enjoy together like drawing or inventing (of course, not without him awkwardly standing next to you, almost stuttering every now and then); Dagur is the one who mostly talks. He would drag you around the island, yelling about how you two would be unstoppable together as dragon hunters and eventually you two might succeed in killing THE night fury! well, he would be the one who did all the job because it's him, obviously 🙄but you were here too, I guess...doing somethin very very important…
Even though Dagur gets a «bit» too crazy during dragon hunting, he still pays a good amount of attention to you. He would constantly make sure you stay NEAR him ALL the time, if you just made a few steps away, he would not bother casually taking your hand and be like 'nuh-uh, you're not going anywhere ☝️' with that calm voice of his, as if he's talking to some reckless little thing like you, who totally needs to be looked after by him. Dagur likes physical touch, he also loves the attention, giving and receiving it at the same time. If something or someone poses a threat to you, he would not hesitate to pull you behind him and deal with it himself.
Hiccup can't be as bold as Dagur though. He's shy, awkward and just doesn't have any experience at all. I'm not sure if Dagur has any experience too, but he's at least confident in what he does. Unlike Dagur, Hiccup is not as strong as him, and most of the time, it makes him frustrated and feel less of himself. He already experienced constant bullying by people on his own island, including his father and he judges himself too. But with Toothless around, he feels less powerless and more hopeful. If he is sure you're fine with dragons, he would find it as a reason to get closer to you. You want to find a dragon friend? Good for you, Hiccup is the best dragon trainer around. If you have your own dragon, it's just more perfect for him, because he would now use the opportunity to show his skills to you and maybe prove that he's actually more than everyone thinks of him? If he's very awkward with you on the ground, eye to eye, he's less tense around you now that he has his best friend around him. After all, it doesn't feel as scary as before.
Dealing with both Dagur and Hiccup would not be easy. Because if they both have a massive crush on you, it's just a matter of time before one finds out about the other. I feel like Dagur might get suspicious at first, because he doesn't care if you like him or someone else, he will be around you. Hold his hands around your waist, shoulders, constantly whining if you just stop paying attention to him as if his life depends on it. If someone approaches you, like Snotlout, he just can't help but show how annoyed he is. Dagur is not shy about making it obvious how the presence of others irritates him.
Hiccup has to be concerned about the dragons' safety, the safety of Berk, Dagur and now yours safety too. If you're not from Berserker Island but from Berk, Dagur doesn't want to part ways at all. He puts his eye on you, and he just can't let you slip away like that. He might just put you over his shoulder and get you on his ship when it's time to go— but thankfully, Hiccup notices this at the right time and saves you from the fate of being stuck with this madman.
If Dagur treats everyone as a possible rival, Hiccup is not that comfortable expressing his feelings yet. I mean, of course he likes you, he would constantly daydream about you like a normal teenage boy, sketching you in his book so many times that even Toothless can replicate it with a stick between his teeth. Well, maybe just a bit more than just a typical teenage boy crush. He knows he can't be like Dagur who can just express his love to you whenever the young Berserker chief sees you, but he shows it in every small but meaningful way he can. Hiccup would find out what you're interested in, what you like, and every small little fact he can memorize, but he would put it like it's just all an accident and pretend like he didn't know anything about it. good for you to have a friend like him?
When things get more heated between you three, Dagur is more protective, he's not that dumb, actually, and he perfectly sees how his bro gets a bit too friendly with you. He really, really tries to think it's just because his two favorite people are being nice to each other and nothing more, but jealousy...! I don't think he would be as violent towards Hiccup as to other people, before «betrayal» he actually thought of the poor boy as the only person he can trust.
«I just HATE how every time I try to get close to [them], someone always appears out of nowhere and takes [their] attention from ME! I mean, [they're] obviously mine, right? You wouldn't try to steal [them] from me too, yes, Hiccup? 🤨 Haha! Of course, you wouldn't, it's not like [they] interested in you anyway ☺️»
«...Right. 👀»
After the fight between the two when it gets revealed about the dragons, Dagur is practically furious. More than usual this time, since he is forced to leave, and he can't see your pretty face again now :((
But good news, it makes you and Hiccup closer now! Whether you want it or not, you were close to Dagur for a good amount of time, you might consider him even some kind of friend of yours. Someone might get a little suspicious of you, because maybe you accidentally took some bits of craziness from Dagur too, but eventually, Hiccup, being the sweet trustful sweetheart would make sure you feel as comfortable as possible. He stays longer than usual, asks if maybe you need a nice quiet ride with him and Toothless just to clear your mind off the recent incident, would always be the one who checks on you every day. He really, really wants to do more, but expressing his true feelings is still so hard for him. It was said that Hiccup is a good gift maker, so expect to receive some small gifts next to your door out of nowhere.
While being away from you, Dagur thinks only about these three things. Night Fury. Hiccup. You. 🔁
His ego hurts, his heart aches, and it doesn't help that he gets even more violent towards others. Every time he tries to attack the riders, he hopes to see you too. When he spots you on your dragon with other riders, he is happy. But you are with dragon riders, so he quickly loses his temper, screaming orders about how his people should focus on capturing you and night fury, the others don't really matter to him.
You just can't help but notice how the fights between the two get more serious with each time now that you're the main target. Dagur would make it one of his personal goals to drag you back to his ship, meanwhile Hiccup would do everything to not get you on Dagur's ship. And that just repeats over and over again, at this point it's just something deeply personal you three have. Meanwhile, the others are left all confused and lost. The time Dagur spent in prison is probably not for the best, isn't it?
#httyd x reader#yandere x reader#how to train your dragon x reader#yandere httyd x reader#hiccup haddock x reader#dagur the deranged x reader#dagur x reader#hiccup x reader#yandere how to train your dragon#yandere httyd#yandere hiccup haddock#yandere dagur the deranged#yandere hiccup#httyd rtte#httyd rob#dagur the deranged#hiccup haddock#male yandere#yandere#yandere imagines
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oh i had a thought btw and i wanted to share in the chat we're in but i got no access at the time i'm typing this BUT I FIGURED I COULD SAY IT TO YOU
me and my roommate after seeing the movie had a thought about what Shadow would do next after the events of the movie and the scene at the end credits of him surviving.
we imagined like...what if he just tries to wander the earth, slightly aimless but also trying to take stuff in. he had spent so long here and most of his exposure was through Maria and doing things with her. And that was it. 50 years he was locked away, and when he got out he just went straight into mission mode and even after saving the earth, it occurred to him he probably hadn't seen much of it.
and the idea of him somehow being found my sonic and the gang and them offering to house him but him declining, thinking he caused them too much trouble and it'd be best to keep his distance... even though he wouldn't know where to go and where's a safe place for him to not be bothered by gun agents or humans likely after them, him especially. Heck, Sonic even offering to show him around some places, not even Green Hills but just in places he knows off the top of his head. Lil bonding moment, nice moment between the two despite Shadow not knowing what the hell Sonic is talking about with his ramblings.
And then the final piece of Sonic realising that Shadow could maybe stay in his old cave, it served as his safe spot for so long so maybe it can serve as Shadows. Shadow even seeing Sonic's little drawing on the wall and him saying he drew it the first night he came here, just showing he did have someone he loved and lost. And my roommate even said the idea of him choosing the stay and even draw a picture of him and Maria (maybe not the doctor after all that happened but maybe so, who knows how he feels about him now).
and then just him very very possible occasionally maybe hanging out with the boys... or at least the offer is there. and getting slowly introduced and catching up on things he's missed these last 50 years...
ANYWHO I'LL STOP HAHA
I can totally see Shadow roaming for a while. Learning about the world, people watching.
He had never left the facility before, and this was all completely new to him. Maybe Maria told him about things while they were together, movies she'd seen, places she'd like to visit when she was older and could strike out on her own.
And maybe he visited them, thinking about how Maria would have loved this, or hated that, or been so excited by this other thing. It would hurt so much that he was seeing these places alone. That she hadn't had a chance to travel and see or do everything she'd dreamed of.
And maybe when it hurts too much, when he can't take the heartache of not sharing these experiences with the one person he loved, he would return to Green Hills. He wouldn't specifically seek out Sonic and crew. He'd formed an alliance with the blue hedgehog during a time of war, and he wasn't sure if that friendship extended any further than that. But he could sense the chaos energy within Sonic, and Knuckles, and from the Master Emerald. And that was comforting.
But maybe Tails has some antennas posted around town. (Or he hacked into GUN's satellites.) And maybe he gets a blip when a spike of chaos energy appears. Sonic goes to check it out and finds Shadow, sitting alone on a cliff overlooking the town.
They talk. Sonic tries to invite Shadow to the house, but he refuses. He'd injured Tom, he doesn't deserve their kindness. Sonic tries to argue, but Shadow is stubborn and makes to teleport away, when Sonic calls out to wait, he knows the perfect place Shadow can hide away when he needs someplace quiet.
And he leads Shadow to his old cave.
"It ain't the Ritz," Sonic quips, before catching himself. "Wait. Do you know about the Ritz?"
Shadow turns to him with an eyebrow raised. "The crackers?"
Sonic snickers. "Right. Nevermind. Anyway, it can get a little damp when it rains, and a little cold when it snows, and a little dark when it's night . . . but it was my home before I found my family."
Shadow stops before the crayon mural on the wall. He stares at it for a long time.
"It will do."
Sonic smiles. "Wow, high praise from the Ultimate Lifeform. Okay, well, I can bring you some food and comics and stuff to keep you entertained--"
"I don't need your handouts."
The blue hedgehog nods with a sigh. "Right. Mr. I'm So Edgy can take care of himself."
"That's right."
Sonic doesn't say anything for a moment, and when he does, his voice is softer, the joking lilt gone. "Listen, as one formerly lonely hedgehog to another, it's nice to have people care about you. Worry about you. So just . . . don't turn your back on people who want to help, okay?"
Shadow stands quietly for a moment. "Fine."
And Shadow isn't always in the cave (heaven forbid we say he lives in it, amirite SEGA?) but Sonic leaves him things anyway. Cans of food, books he thinks Shadow would like, lots of blankets.
And maybe Sonic tells the family about Shadow taking shelter in his old cave, and the next time Shadow reappears there, it's better weather sealed and more comfortable and homey. The opening is covered with an actual door, one that keeps animals and rain out.
And maybe there's a note left. One that tells Shadow they don't blame him for what he did to Tom. They understand he was stressed and confused and hurting. They forgive him. And their home is always open for him, if he were hurt, or hungry, or just wanted some company.
And maybe, one night, when the family is sitting down for supper, a flash of light appears in the backyard. Ozzy runs to the door, barking at the sudden intruder in his territory, Knuckles close behind.
And there in the middle of the yard, stands Shadow. Looking very uncomfortable. Looking like he's second guessing his presence. Looking like he's just about to teleport away.
The family stands in the doorway, looking out at the black and red hedgehog. Without a word, they turn and head back to the supper table, but leave the kitchen door open.
The choice is his. Join them. Or leave.
He stands there for a long few moments, watching as they sit down, dishing out the food. Maddie moves to the cabinet and brings another plate to the table, placing it between her and Sonic. Silverware joins it. And a glass of water.
Shadow is frozen.
He takes a step forward. And another.
And takes his place at the table.
He doesn't move in with the Wachowskis. He's not there all the time. But they always make sure to have plenty of food to go around if he chose to join them.
There's always a place at their table for a lonely hedgehog.
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Hello love Can I ask for Raphael x reader where Raph actually shows love, buuut in his own twisted way? One of my fam members had autism and he never ever said those three words, but showed it in acts of service and paying attention to what you say/do aaand i was thinking about Raphael who tries to show how much he loves her(or them) but well he's not very good at this. Tav reading book- he will read it too, because he cares...just to tell her how much it sucks. She's bleeding after a fight? Throws her into his healing pool and tell her how stupid she is for the whole time he's with her and how she wastes his time, but won't leave her alone, because what if this dumb mortal drowns herself? A guy said something to her and she felt like sh*t or he touched her to make her uncomfortable? He would give her a very fancy box with big bow and smiles innocently at her ; 'Come on little mouse..open it' just for her to see somebodys hand or head 'oh..this? its this creep from yesterday' Tav wears something cheap? oh boy he would tell her everythink he thinks about this rag. She thinks he wants her to wear only expensive things, because how she looks=his reputation but the truth is he thinks she deserves only the most lavish things in her life and he wont allow her to live below HIS standards And his fav way of showing love is giving her mortal who hurt her in any way already beaten so they wont demage his precious possesion, but conscious enough so she can enjoy torturing them (for sure he does it for his own amusement more than hers)
What a fun prompt! Although, to be fair, I can't exactly make it totally healthy because Raphael isn't an emotionally healthy person to be in a relationship with so this is still a little bit dark, though definitely not awful haha.
ETA: ah crap I missed the part about x reader. So sorry about that. In my defence, I truly cannot write from second person point of view. I’m very, very sorry anon. I’ve tried before and it feels awkward to me and everything comes out… bad.
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Sometimes she feels hollowed out, as if something essential has been scooped clean from within her. She’s not sure why she stays—or even if she’s staying at all. Maybe he’s holding her here, maybe she has no choice, maybe she lost that freedom long ago. Because you don’t walk away when Raphael is speaking; you don’t walk away when he’s watching you. And his eyes are always on her, always, always, always following.
That gaze—it leaves her feeling half trapped, half sanctified, as though caught in some dreadful, holy spell. He doesn’t look at others this way, she knows that, but that knowledge only tightens the hold, winds the snare around her. It’s nothing, she tells herself—this attention, his careful watch—yet it feels like everything, a binding without words, a noose drawing tighter, a claw sinking deeper. Time twists strangely when he’s near, spiraling into something she can’t name, and she can’t help but wonder: will his interest wane, fade away to nothing? Or will it sharpen, tighten, until it consumes her, leaving her breathless, until there’s no space left at all?
If it does—if he closes around her entirely, if his grip becomes her world, pressing in until there’s no air, no light, only him—what will she be then?
And she’s not even sure if he cares. He holds her there, yes, but it feels like watching a game; his own personal mousetrap, an exquisite little experiment to see how far she'll reach for the cheese. She wonders if he’s simply taking what he can, drawing her deeper until he tires of her, only to discard her when he does, laughing at her fascination with him. She can almost see it—him spitting in her face, turning her out with a sneer, then pulling her back in just as quickly. He'd fuck her, taunt her, pull her close only to watch her shatter, then laugh, invite her back with a gift, something golden, expensive, dripping with indulgent mockery.
But then there are the other things he does, things that somehow feel worse—things that make the walls seem as though they’re closing in, or maybe as if he’s drawing her into some embrace she can’t escape from. She’s not sure which would be more terrifying.
Sometimes, when they’re in Avernus together, she finds the portals dead, the way back to her world—a world of soft light and mortal trivialities, the Gate and its grime—suddenly blocked, cut off. And it's always the same dance. She demands an answer, asks why she can’t pass through, why she’s stuck here in this burning place with him, unable to flee back to the familiar. And he only waves her off, barely looking up, irritation flickering in his gaze. He says he hasn’t the time to bother with “simple magic,” that she can wait.
But he knows, he knows damn it, that she can barely summon a spark, let alone force open a gateway on her own. He knows she’s trapped, helpless as a moth in a bottle, wings beating frantically against glass she can’t see. And he watches her, almost bored, as she paces, her panic ripening, sinking roots in her chest. Because he knows she won’t leave, can’t leave, and he’ll let her struggle just long enough to make her feel it—the helplessness, the claustrophobia, the bitter thrill of his control, closing around her, almost gentle, almost loving.
And then, only then, he flicks his fingers, and the portals blaze open, bright and mocking, as if they’d never gone dead at all.
She's interrupting him, Raphael says, a nuisance he has no time for. Important matters, contracts to seal, souls to collect—real work to do, and here she is, lingering in his shadow, hovering as if she belongs, asking him to breathe life into a stupid portal. He snaps at her to leave, to stop her pestering, to get out of his sight. And so she does, shrinking back, biting her lip, retreating into her quiet corner.
But then, later—always, somehow, later—he comes to her, waking her from half-sleep as he climbs over her, pressing down with a heat that seems to burn straight through her skin. He murmurs his need, his lust, his rough, clumsy want, lips grazing her ear with words that are half-whispered, half-demanded. And she lets him, wraps her arms around his back, holds him, breathes through the rush of his hands, the awkward rhythm of his taking.
She feels the weight of him, the feverish heat, and she sighs into it, into him, because in the Hells, everything is unbearably hot. His skin burns against hers, more furnace than flesh, and though she knows he’s hasty, heedless, that she’s just an outlet, a brief relief, she takes it. She lets herself be consumed by it, that pressing heat because here, with him, it’s as close to comfort as she’ll ever get.
But sometimes there are moments that make her think he might care, moments she savors, drinks in slowly, wondering if they're real or merely the product of his boredom. She can never quite tell, but she doesn’t mind; she lingers on these glimmers of gentleness, holds them in her memory far longer than she should.
Like when she’s soaking in his absurdly large bath, reclining in the steaming water with her arms folded along the edge, her head resting on cool stone, hair spilling loose behind her. She’s doing nothing at all, simply breathing in the warmth, letting the steam curl around her. And then he appears, slipping into the room, extending those long legs of his, rolling up his sleeves as he settles by her side. He doesn’t join her in the water; instead, he simply sits, a book resting in his hands, the very one she finished days ago.
She watches, amused, as he leafs through it, the prominent wrinkle between his brows deepening with each page he turns. His expression is one of studied distaste, the kind that would be comical on anyone else. But on him, it’s strangely captivating.
“Unhinged drivel,” Raphael mutters finally, his tone ripe with disdain.
“Hm,” she echoes, half-lidded, watching him through the steam.
“Why do you read this?” he questions. “I have half a mind to burn it. The sheer embarrassment of sharing the same air with it—I hardly want it in my library.”
She smiles, faintly, eyes closing as she stretches a little deeper into the warmth. “I’m done with it,” she replies, lazily. “Do what you wish.”
He taps two fingers against the spine. “The Duke is an absolute cretin, I must say.”
“Oh?” she murmurs, her voice barely a breath above the water’s surface.
“Utterly insipid,” he continues. "Such posturing, such shallow arrogance. I wouldn’t offer him a contract if he were the last soul on the proverbial platter.”
She laughs then, quietly, letting the sound ripple through the steam. She knows Raphael is just indulging in his own particular brand of superiority, delighting in the verbal dissection, and maybe he doesn’t care for her company at all. But still, he stays, perched beside her, weaving disdainful monologues that settle like warm coals in her chest. And for a moment—just a moment—she lets herself pretend that he’s here for her.
He continues, eyes fixed on the offending book as if it’s a particularly irksome insect. “The Duke’s speech in chapter five...” he says. “So very witless, wouldn't you say? Who professes undying love with such clumsy metaphors? And in the garden, no less, like a character in a tragic farce. ‘You are my sun and moon,’” he scoffs, his voice rising to a mock-romantic lilt. “‘My stars, my breath, my—’”
He pauses, catching her wide-eyed, incredulous look. A faint smirk pulls at the corner of his mouth, and there’s a glimmer of something—mischief?—in his gaze. “Oh, little mouse, don’t look at me like that. Surely you didn’t think I’d stoop to reading this… for enjoyment?”
She raises an eyebrow, half-laughing, half incredulous. “You read it?”
“Of course I read it,” he replies, with all the haughtiness of a scholar who’s just suffered through a poorly constructed essay. “I couldn’t very well leave such intellectual refuse lying about in my library without inspecting it first.”
“Just inspecting it? Raphael, you just quoted chapter five.”
He waves his hand dismissively. “A tragic misfortune. I assure you, it was purely incidental. I only skimmed enough to confirm my suspicions about its total lack of merit.”
“Right,” she says, rolling her eyes, watching as he flips another page with painstaking precision. “Is that why you’re carrying it around?”
He raises an eyebrow, looking at her over the book with that familiar, aristocratic arch of his brow. “Little mouse,” he drawls, his tone both affectionate and condescending, “you really must learn what jests are. I can’t go about explaining them every time, you know.”
The novel is set aside.
His hand slips below the water, and she knows, he’s done talking, at least about her books. His fingers graze her skin, tracing erratic patterns. She feels his hand leave her only to hear the soft rustle of fabric, and then he’s there, sliding into the water, slipping behind her.
His arms wrap around her even as he pushes her against the cool stone of the bath’s edge. She feels his impatience in the way his hands move—roaming, relentless, almost rough, his fingers pressing into her skin, biting, digging between the ribs, as if he can’t bear to be gentle.
One hand cups her shoulder, anchoring her as his other hand travels down her side. It moves in a slow sweep, now a caress, almost reverent, then shifting, tracing a path with no pattern, simply moving, as if he’s learning her contours anew. His grip tightens, loosens, a rhythm that speaks of need and very little restraint.
He dips his head, face buried in her hair, and she feels the weight of his breath, the moist heat of it on the exhale. There’s a hunger in his closeness, an intensity that borders on obsession. He’s quiet now, all the long-winded, self-important monologues silenced, his usual need to fill the space with words abandoned.
She feels him pressing against her back, the hard, insistent weight of him, the subtle rock of his hips, and she sighs, her body folding further against the edge of the bath, yielding to him. The warmth in her chest spills out, dissipating into something intangible, and once again, she wonders: Was this all just a performance for her, or something he needs for himself? Was that little, half-sweet conversation meant to soften her, make her more pliant? Or, against all logic, did he truly want to speak to her, to share in that strange, fleeting intimacy?
She wonders if he cares, even a little, if those sarcastic, needlessly elaborate jests of his are meant to coax a smile from her, to make her laugh. Or is it all calculated, a ploy to keep her engaged, to ensure that when he fucks her, she meets him with something more than passive resignation? She feels his fingers tighten on her waist, his breath hitch, and for a moment, just a moment, she allows herself to believe there’s something deeper beneath his touch, something that holds her in place as much as his arms do.
There are other moments too, moments that sink into her like a sickness, twisting her stomach, filling her with a dread so deep it almost makes her want to flee, to scrub herself clean, to be rid of him. And yet, those same moments leave her feeling strangely exhilarated, a little unhinged, as though some part of her is thrilled by the horror of it all.
Take the merchant, for instance. A two-penny swindler, trying to pass off cheap fabric as something exquisite. She spots his scam instantly—anyone with half a brain would—but he’s audacious, leaning in, voice low and greasy as he sells his lie. She calls him out, unimpressed, and he snaps, calling her a cunt. She flips him off without a second thought and moves on, thinking nothing more of it. She’s heard worse, so much worse, and just because she looks the part of a noblewoman at Raphael’s insistence doesn’t mean she’s forgotten the dirt and sweat of her own past. She knows the cheap tricks—how cloth is dyed in back alleys, stained with whatever can be found, how insect paste and a dash of alchemical solution turn cotton into “silk” for gullible morons. She’s done it all herself, seen the worst of it, and this pathetic attempt to cheat her hardly scratches the surface.
She forgets the encounter entirely—until the next day. Raphael barely glances up from his writing, absorbed in the ink-stained pages of yet another infernal contract, when he pushes a small, ornate box across the table toward her. He doesn’t say anything, doesn’t even acknowledge it beyond a faint, almost bored gesture. She blinks, glancing from the box to him, and then back, curious but wary, wondering if this is another one of his games.
She takes it, hesitates, then lifts the lid.
Inside, nestled against dark velvet, is a finger. Blue, bloated, stiff with the grip of death. Her stomach turns, nausea creeping up her throat as she stares at it, bile rising as the realization settles—this isn’t just some random, expensive trinket. It’s a message, as clear and cold as the dead flesh before her.
“Oh,” she whispers, voice strangled, unable to look away from the pale digit lying in the box, rigor mortis locking it in a ghastly curl. Her hands are trembling, fingers itching to drop the box, to shove it away, to wipe away the memory of this grotesque gift.
She looks up at him, horrified, and finds his gaze resting on her, idle, yet somehow amused.
She stares some more, her mind spinning as she tries to process what she’s holding, what this grotesque little gift is meant to convey. A part of her wants to retch, to bolt from the room, while another, unhinged part of her feels an inexplicable pull, an urge to draw closer to him, to be entangled in whatever madness constantly hangs off his sleeve.
But she doesn’t do any of those things. Instead, she lets out a half-laugh, shaky and weak. “That’s… not what usually comes in jewelry boxes.”
Raphael arches a brow. “I’ve given you plenty of jewelry, little mouse. Rings, bracelets, earrings—a whole collection of baubles you hardly deign to wear. Lavaliers, circlets, gems so fine even the simpering nobles of Waterdeep would weep for them. And yet, here you sit, determined to remain a rube.” He tsks, rolling his eyes with theatrical annoyance. “Mayhaps, I thought, just mayhaps, you might appreciate something different to suit that plebeian palate of yours.”
“Whose is it?” she asks, though she already knows. She feels the answer in the pit of her stomach, in the memory of yesterday’s insults and her dismissive walk away.
He only shrugs, dipping his quill in ink. “I’m told he was a merchant.” He pauses, as if to savor the uncertainty flickering across her face. “Or was it a dockhand? Perhaps a barkeep. Truly, who can keep track of such insignificant lives?”
She watches, spellbound in a way she can’t quite understand, as he sprinkles pounce over the wet ink, the tiny white particles catching the dim light. He lifts the paper, blowing the pounce off with a sharp exhale that sends the fine dust scattering into the air, drifting toward her. She coughs, swatting it away, a moment of reflexive frustration breaking through her discomfort.
“So many names,” Raphael murmurs, almost to himself. “So many lives, so many inconsequential little people. It’s hard to keep them all straight, isn’t it?”
She stares at him, a blend of revulsion and fascination churning within her. His words hang in the air, so careless, so detached, as if snuffing out a life meant nothing more to him than discarding an old, forgotten knickknack. And yet, he looks at her now, watching, as if expecting her reaction, waiting to see if she’ll recoil or lean closer.
She leans closer, letting the moment pull her in, and he gives a satisfied little hum, returning to his writing with an air of contentment, as if the world is exactly as it should be. She watches the steady flow of his hand, the way his quill glides across the page in elegant, looping strokes, his cursive rising and falling. Her mind, however, catches on another thought, one that wraps around her and refuses to let go.
He cares, she thinks, or at least he acts as though he does. This is how he responds to insults aimed at her, as if her offense is his to avenge. But another thought lingers, darker and heavier. He knows—that’s what unsettles her. If he knows, that means he saw, or had someone watch on his behalf, and that means she’s never truly alone, even when he isn’t there. She wonders how far that gaze extends, if he’s tracking her every step, every word, if he’s marked her movements like pinpoints on a map, an invisible tether she’s unknowingly bound herself to.
Her hand drifts to her throat, almost absently, fingers brushing the skin there as if she might feel some hidden collar, a leash she’s been wearing all along without realizing it. But of course, there’s nothing—just bare skin and the faint, lingering warmth of her own touch. Still, the thought unsettles her, sends a flutter of anxiety mixed with something else, something uncomfortably close to… warmth. A warmth that spreads through her chest, that holds her in place despite the quiet urge in her feet to stand, to move, to walk as far as she can.
But she doesn’t. Instead, she stays there, leaning close, just watching him as he writes, utterly absorbed in whatever Infernal text he’s crafting. And as she watches, that warmth in her chest grows, mingling with her apprehension, a mix of dread and fascination that knots itself around her, binding her there as securely as any leash he might conjure.
Another day, another reckoning.
She’s a mess of bruises, skin mottled and darkened so thoroughly she resembles a patchwork quilt rather than a woman. There had been a brawl, Astarion may or may not have thrown punches he couldn’t back, and they both may or may not have drunk too much. Korrilla may or may not have been at the Caress at the same time, her wicked laughter mingling with the chaos, and now her nose is a crimson fountain, dripping ceaselessly. Even the potion Korrilla forced down her throat did nothing to blunt the ache, the slight sneer on Korrilla’s face as she half-carried her back to the House of Hope making it clear she didn’t particularly want to be back tonight.
When she stumbles in, Haarlep just laughs, calling her a “bloody, battered fool” and waving her off in disgust when she starts peeling off her clothes. With a muttered “Ew,” he disappears as she limps toward the restoration pool, her one salvation tonight. She knows it’s usually reserved for soothing injuries from far more… pleasurable encounters, but she hardly cares as she sinks into it, wincing as the water starts working its magic, stitching up minor cuts and scrapes as she closes her eyes and lets her head fall back.
She drifts, the water lapping around her, letting the throbbing recede—until a sharp yank at her scalp rips her back to the present, her head wrenched above the water. She chokes, sputtering out bloody droplets as her eyes snap open, and she finds herself staring at Raphael’s livid face, exasperation etched in every line. His hand is tangled in her hair, and her scalp stings from his tight grip. He glances down at his dripping sleeves, soaked from pulling her up, and curses.
“What a stupid way to die,” he hisses. “Drowning in my boudoir because you’re too idiotic to stay awake.” His fingers tighten in her hair, and there’s no mercy in his eyes. “Take a deep breath now.”
She barely has a second to react before he shoves her head under the water, his hand pressing down with unrelenting force. Her body jerks, and she inhales raggedly before he drags her up again, just long enough for her to gasp for air and catch his sharp, appraising look before he shoves her down once more, holding her under like a misbehaving dog in need of punishment. Water floods her nose, stinging as she chokes, her hands scrabbling for purchase against the pool’s edge.
Up again, another cursory glance, and then he plunges her under once more, his grip firm, a rhythm of punishment and cleansing, as though he’s scrubbing the night’s sins from her with each forced dunk. She claws at his wrist, nails scraping against his skin, and he finally releases her, leaving her gasping and hacking as she collapses against the pool’s edge, water pouring from her lungs in a desperate, wheezing cough.
She realizes then, as she shudders and coughs, that the blood is gone; her nose, once a mess of numb throbbing, now feels raw but whole. She clutches the pool’s edge, head bowed, catching her breath as the water stills around her. Raphael just stands there, dripping, sleeves ruined, as he observes her.
“Well,” he mutters, flicking water from his fingers with a faint sneer, “at least you’re less of a mess now.”
He hauls her from the water, pulling her sodden form from the boudoir and away from the rumpled heap of her clothes. His eyes drift over them—the plain tunic, the uninspired trousers, the scuffed leather boots—with a look of disdain so pointed it almost makes her wince.
“An offense to beauty itself,” he murmurs, almost to himself, though the words slap her just the same. “These… things.” His lip curls. “They will burn. They’re an affront to my eyes, and my patience is wearing thin.”
His gaze slides back to her face, catching on her bruised nose, and he tilts her head with the care one might give a very expensive artifact. His fingers are unhurried, methodical, as he surveys her battered skin. “I don’t keep unsightly things, you know,” he says. “I like my things beautiful. It’s why I collect them—why I keep them close.”
Then, as if struck by a sudden thought, his tone shifts to something almost conversational, a careless elegance in his words that sets her nerves alight. “Tell me, little mouse,” he begins, fingers tapping idly on his thigh, “shall I lock the door?”
She feels a shiver run through her, her voice faltering. “Which… one?”
He tilts his head in mock contemplation. “Why not all of them?”
“Raphael…” she starts, but she isn’t even sure what she wants to say, or if there’s anything to be said at all.
Unhurriedly, he begins to strip off his clothes, each gesture carried out with an almost ritualistic elegance. He slips out of his doublet, casting it aside with a look of mild annoyance. “Your doing,” he sighs, smoothing an imaginary crease before discarding it. “This fabric—fine enough to silence even the heavens—ruined by your negligence. It cost more than you could dream, more than most would spend in a lifetime.”
She watches, stuck somewhere between disbelief and fascination, unsure if he’s preparing to fuck her or simply indulging in the strange meticulousness of his undressing. Each cufflink is unfastened with almost absurd care, each tie released with the same flawless precision she knows so well. The clothes fold neatly under his hands, smoothed and arranged as if they were sacred relics, and though part of her wants to laugh at the absurdity, she knows better than to test his patience now.
Raphael pauses, shirt open just enough to reveal the line of his throat, his collarbone stark against tan skin. His eyes pin hers and his voice takes on a melodic, almost regretful tone. “Perhaps if I lock you in,” he murmurs, “you might refrain from throwing yourself into every pit of squalor in the Gate, seeking out any hand willing to smash that face of yours.”
“No one seeks that, Raphael,” she says, her voice sounding distant. “It just… happens.”
He snaps his fingers with a sharp, final click. “Yes, yes,” he echoes, almost as if humoring a child. “And doors just… lock themselves.”
#my asks#shortstories#raphael bg3#raphael x tav#raphael baldur's gate 3#raphael the cambion#he sucks and she can't make him better#but he cares in his own way#tho it's not a healthy way lol
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Maybe this is silly and I totally get if there’s not a whole lot to write about with it but I always see x readers in which the girl or person is SO much smaller than Billy, yk? Is it possible to perchance see some tall person representation. Give me a 5’11 x reader….. just once. Thank you for even reading and considering this <3
omg not silly at all! truly I think ff writers are just chronically short- I'm 5'2 haha. I would be so happy to write somth for this! <3 hope I did this right, thank you sm for the request! <3
꣑ৎ౨ৎbilly with a tall girl꣑ৎ౨ৎ fem reader x billy the kid
Truly I'm drawing from my imagination/the experiences of my tall friends but here's some little blurbs for this! A little bit of "tall girl insecure ab her height" here cause in the wild west the average woman was short asf
𝜗𝜚 Billy loves the fact that he can meet your eyes directly. He doesn't have to strain his neck looking down- you're always just right there, literally within arm's reach. Maybe sometimes he drops his head to your shoulder after a long day, your body nice and level with his, just where he likes it. Same goes with kissing you- all he has to do is lean in, not down.
𝜗𝜚 Sometimes you're a little insecure about being taller than other girls, but he always assures you he loves it. "It only makes ya prettier, honey," he smiles, hand tracing your calf. You're sitting right by him, half on his lap, legs all tangled up in his after a long day. "You're like an angel. Long legs 'n all." He probably didn't even think of it as something to be insecure about before- just a part of you like the color of your eyes.
𝜗𝜚 Maybe you worry about going out with Billy and wearing shoes with a little heel, because they make you the same height or taller than him, but he doesn't mind one bit, holding your hand proudly and talking about how excited he is to show off his girl.
𝜗𝜚 Just had the thought of him bending down to kiss you from his horse- like he doesn't have to reach that far, and he makes a little joke about how that's the furthest he'll have to bend to kiss you.
𝜗𝜚 When you're sleeping in the same bed, your legs are chronically tangled together because the bed is barely long enough for you both. So with a little bending and adjusting, you and Billy are able to cuddle into a mass of knotted limbs.
𝜗𝜚 While you used to slouch a lot before, Billy's love for you despite what you'd once considered a hindrance gave you confidence to sit up straight. He found you so beautiful, and the way he saw you made you a little prouder of your height than before. And he loves it when he sees you growing more comfortable in your skin- Billy wants you to love all of yourself the same way he does.
𝜗𝜚 Even though your height adds a little extra weight naturally, Billy picks you up because he just likes to hold you. Maybe you try and protest this, but he raises his eyebrows at you. "Whatcha talkin' 'bout? 'M a strong man, baby. I can carry my girl. Doesn't matter how tall you are."
𝜗𝜚 Overall it's hard to be a tall woman in this time- you aren't viewed as feminine in the same way that other girls are, and men seem to be intimidated by you. But Billy tears it all down and throws every norm to the wind. He loves you for you, not solely for your appearance. "Prettiest girl in the West," he comments nearly every time he sees you, the happiest grin splitting his face. "My girl's got the longest legs 'n the prettiest face- I'm a lucky, lucky man."
I really really hope I did this right anon <3 Hope you enjoyed 🫶🫶🫶
#billy the kid#billy the kid x reader#billy the kid fanfiction#billy the kid x you#william h bonney x reader#william h bonney fanfiction#william h bonney x you#william h bonney imagines#billy the kid imagines#billy the kid fanfic#billy the kid imagine#william h bonney fanfic#william h bonney imagine#william h bonney#milliesfishes billy#millietalks
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I love your valhoun fics you are literally the smartest and cleverest person ever I especially love your characterisation of Alyx where she's outwardly kind of flirty towards Barney but wondering if she's saying the "right ´thing" in the same beat ughh and also the way u write Barney is such a breath of fresh air
Oh my god, this is so sweet and validating, thank you!!! 🥹 Tumblr never showed me a notification for this, so sorry if I'm replying super late.
And yes, you get it! I feel like my valhoun fics are super niche and self-indulgent and I'm not always confident that their characterization is as clear to readers as it is in my head, so I'm super relieved to hear Alyx is coming across exactly as intended. (And I am now going to use this ask as an excuse to ramble because I have so many thoughts about them!)
In the Passing Through series, Alyx is 22-ish — more mature and less naive than she was in HLA at 19, but not quite as confident as her future 24-year-old HL2 self. She's genuinely attracted to Barney for all the obvious reasons, but she also kind of sees him like a stray dog she wants to rescue and is somewhat conscious of the fact that she's drawn to him because of his connection to her pre-rescas life. I'm really enjoying writing this version of her and I'm definitely not drawing on any personal experiences here, haha. Eli is for sure having a little bit of a Dad Aneurysm about this, but he supports Alyx in making her own decisions and he trusts Barney. Mostly.
Barney, meanwhile, is torn between being attracted to Alyx for all the obvious reasons and desperately wanting A Fucking Break from the monotonous, violent hellscape of his everyday life, while also being painfully aware that he is (1) unable to offer her anything resembling a fulfilling relationship, (2) arguably putting her safety at risk every time they interact, and (3) almost 40. Plus, you know, all the burnout and self-loathing and perhaps some body image issues. Thank you for not throwing tomatoes at me even when Barney's inner turmoil makes him act like a total ass.
They'll sort their shit out eventually. Maybe.
In all seriousness, I have plans for at least 3 more fics in this universe, most of which are considerably sexier and (slightly?) less depressing than the most recent installment. Will I ever have time to write them? My job says no, but my new year's resolution to start phoning it the fuck in at my job says... maybe? And it really means a lot to know that someone besides me is looking forward to reading more, when/if the stars align. 💙💜
#asks#anon#seriously thank you for saying nice things#and for motivating me to work on an outline even though I am super tired from snowstorm nonsense <3#valhoun
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Re the prev ask/answer... Yeah that's totally valid and understandable! I'm also feeling kinda sad and conflicted about Sol at this point
I still love his character for the most part, but also yikes.. I almost want to just live in a fanon universe where he didn't act the way he did back in Brendok but that's easier said than done emotionally
I was lowkey wanting to draw him and maybe I still will someday, portraits are a different vibe after all, but yeah I definitely get why it'd feel weird now to draw more character/interaction focused art like yours
Love Grogu and Din too, they're adorable! I actually didn't watch much of the Mandalorian but maybe I'll check it out again when the Acolyte's finally over. Also sorry for the long rambly ask! XD
gonna put both of your asks into one here.
Yeah you get me. I can still draw Jecki, im used to character death in media now it's no big deal. More angst more ideas lol. But it's a diff story for Sol tho. I admit I have my own bias towards Sol cuz of his father's instinct, and also it's the first time I have an Asian Jedi Master who's wise and likable (my other fav was Plo Koon). So the reveal hurts way worse. I still think that there's a much better way to handle their story while staying in character and still having the same tragic outcome, still putting Sol in the position of someone living w his guilt and shame. The canon event did make him a much more interesting and complex character, yes, but I can't help feeling like he's made to be a punching bag for the narrative atp. Again, great premise, not so good execution, imo.
And yeah now I can't draw him without feeling shitty because all I want to draw is his fatherly interaction w the kids. I could, if i want to. But once I post it online, I can't stop ppl from coming in and saying "well uh actually he did that", and "Jecki and Yord would not like him" yada yada. I read everyone's tags and cmt, and as a non-confrontational person, it will affect me and make me feel shitty even more. So im just gonna protect my own peace and go back to my safe space haha. I'm just a silly guy making fanart for fun, im not paid for any of this experience aksjdhalsd
#A lot of Korean fans also pointed out that why do ppl still like Anakin when he did all of that stuff in his youth as a Knight#but now when it's Sol they started pointing fingers and shit on him and saying he's a creep#shit sucks and idw to step into this lol#hell i dont even dare going into the tag after ep7 there are alr so many bad takes out there i dont think i can take it#yapping in hyperspace#parkissat#the acolyte#the acolyte spoilers
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I'm going to get a little brainrotty with my Zhongli Psychoanalysis here
I feel like it's a long shot to even make this post because I still don't understand this website very well.... but I truly hope someone out there will enjoy reading my perspective!
I want to elaborate more specifically on the "Zhongli has Dissociative Identity Disorder" fanfic drabble thing I wrote last week, now that I'm more coherent (with lines from the game as evidence) 👍
^ my little headcanon of what they look like..... for headcanon consistency's sake (´-ω-`)
Basically, my headcanon is that Zhongli has DID. Their parts are Zhongli, Rex Lapis, Morax, and quite a few more.
"But being diagnosed with a dissociative disorder requires you to have a spotty memory/blackouts, and Zhongli has a really good one," is what you might be thinking... but I have Answers.
(screenshot from the OSDD/other specified dissociative disorder wikipedia page)
The fact that Zhongli has had so many identities in their life... as far as I know, they're the only current archon who's had so many. Certainly makes you wonder 😐 (Not to mention all the stress and inner turmoil that probably comes with it... *cough.* and they're known for being "existential," too.)
Another thing I wanted to point out was this:
Lack of an ability to plan the future.... it could be their autism (which is a whole other can of worms), but it could also be related to emotional amnesia (possibly speaking from experience....)
And these two lines specifically prove that they exist as multiple separate identities, but in one body.
So, here's where the.... the Brainrot expands.... into MEGA Brainrot..... (you can skip to the * if you don't want to read my overly-specific-totally-not-projecting headcanons.)
Their parts.... I was looking through my drawings yesterday.... and I'd realized I'd already drawn all three of their main parts 🥲
Morax (left), Rex Lapis (right),
and Zhongli, their host (above)
Zhongli is the average everyday life haver. They're basically everything we know about them through the game. Their physical stature is short, and they're very awkward, bad at socializing, and infodump frequently.
Rex Lapis is very polite and good at talking to people, they know how to entertain a group, and they do best in social situations. They have a sort of "aversion" to thoughts spiraling out of control, and a more "laid-back"/relaxed demeanor.
Morax is the "flat affect" and "resting b*tch face" part. They have a more "adult-like" personality, and they've probably got something more going on underneath the surface (like serious depression and repressed memories....)
*Aaaaaanywaayyyyyy.........
Like I said, there's many more parts to Zhongli, I'm just too exhausted to think about it that hard right now. I had to share this because my brain won't stop thinking about it and I needed to get it off my chest (;ω;)
Thank you for reading my cringe infodump..... thank you...... 🥺
(This is probably the longest post I've ever made on tumblr. Haha.)
#zhongli#rex lapis#genshin morax#genshin theory#genshin edit#character study#they/them zhongli#genshin impact#genshin#genshin fanart#my art#zhongli rex lapis and morax my beloved scrunkly fictives#welcome to the peanut gallery ! 🥜
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Hi. I wasn’t trying to be rude when asking about art of Fox by himself. Your OC is cute. I’m sorry for upsetting you.
Oh anon, it is completely ok!
In the moment, it did make me a little sad, but it’s mainly because I overthink, plus previous experiences I’ve had from rude messages in my inbox regarding me and my OC. I closed all my social media DMs back in March, and just recently opened anonymous asks again after the previous hate I have received here. I didn’t feel like your message was hateful at all, I am just a very sensitive person in all honesty, and if I feel even a hint of someone feeling like they dislike or are annoyed with what I do and want me to change what I draw, I get defensive, and I get anxious, especially after the previous bad experiences I’ve had here and on twitter.
It’s a small community, and I worry about annoying and upsetting people with what I put out constantly. But I just want to draw and share what makes me happy. (Plus I just love gushing over oc x canon and even oc x oc ships with my friends and mutuals, haha) But I will draw Fox/Ren alone again like I have previously in the past, and I do have a single only piece for him in the works. :) (tbh, I have only recently shared my art here regularly, but I have sketches dating back from October of last year, I just shared them on my instagram stories only.)
That all is to say, I’m happy with what I’m drawing now, which is making and commissioning art and writing for my oc x canon ship. The bulk of my art will probably continue to be oc x canon. Drawing and writing for Ren and Rina is the most fun I’ve ever had creating, and I guess I’m just protective over the feeling I get when I create for them. Maybe it’s a dumb feeling, idk! I guess I’m just protective of my work and what I do.
It is all totally ok, you do/did not need to apologize, I’m sorry for overthinking and over-analyzing your message. I need to not be so anxious. /gen
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just wanna make a little post because! someone left a very respectful comment on WINRN asking a bit about SQH's choices transition wise. the comment has since been deleted so im not gonna repeat it (if this was you and you were worried plz dont be! i dont mind at all!) and i dont want to embarrass or put pressure on the person, but i thought id write my thoughts on that out here 😊
putting this under a cut because it got long lol
SQH in WINRN is a trans man, and has identified that way since childhood in PIDW-verse. In the real world, he was never out and never socially or medically transition, and had a lot of internalized misogyny and transphobia (which is gonna be explored a bit later in the fic). However, PIDW is canonically a world with no homophobia, which I am taking to mean no transphobia as well!
This is a major culture shock, and one that WINRN's SQH definitely says he is totally cool with and has internalized, but I think he still has a lot of internalized fear rattling around inside, which definitely plays into his choices of how he treats his body.
That said, many trans people don't actually experience a ton of dysphoria when it comes to their secondary sexual characteristics 😊 I myself have a very complicated relationship with my physical sex, which I am pretty much just directly giving to SQH haha. It's definitely not representative of every, or even most, trans experiences, just my own that I want to explore a bit through SQH, especially how that overlaps with having biological children.
Not wanting to medically transition can have a lot of reasons outside of medical concerns or cost. It's a really permanent choice. For me, I'm always like 'okay, but what if I miss my boobs? or what if it just makes no difference for me?' I, like SQH, still spend time not passing for various reasons, and it is useful to be able to girl-code myself when needed, which I wouldn't be able to do as easily if I had medically transitioned.
Drawing from trans friends experiences, some people also just actively like their bodies the way they are! I have a close friend who likes their chest a lot, and actually feels more masc and confident when not binding. Different vibes for different folks :))
That said, unlike myself, I do think that WINRN!SQH does eventually medically transition. His choice not to is a combo of ambivalence towards his body and fear of rejection, so once he is more confident and settled he and MBJ find like. A gender change fruit lol. And because magic, he can always swap back if he wants hahaha.
It hasn't come up yet, but WINRN is also T4T Moshang! Mobei-jun is also a trans man who has made very different choices than SQH when it comes to his transition. He gets much less self-shame/dysphoria, and transitioned later but went right for medical transition. Growing up in PIDW-verse where it's not a big deal gives him a different perspective than SQH. He just like... cut his tits off and did an ice ritual and was all set 😂
ANYWAYS thats just my gender headcanons for this fic hahaha. thank you for reading if you got this far! and literally never worry about leaving comments or asks with questions on the gender stuff, im very comfy talking about it and very hard to offend ❤️
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numbers 4, 14, 17, 27, 41, 65, and 77 for that q&a 💖
Thank you so much for asking!!! 😍🩵
Answering questions from this post!
4. Where Do You Find Inspiration For New Ideas?
Whew uh... they sorta come to me out of the blue! For example, during mundane tasks- often at work- I'll try to think up where I'm going in the work I'm currently engaging in and try to plan out conversations and dialogue in my head! I did this with an Act 3 scene today while plugging away through my boring accounting routine, and I figured out an entire conversation to solve the Ascended vs. Spawn debate between Ofelia and Astarion later on in With Stars to Fill My Dream! Sometimes stuff really just comes to me out of no where- I often just daydream about the story or future potential oneshots. ❤️ Sometimes, I discuss existing ideas with my partner and he and I go back and forth and he'll offer an outside perspective (and he's great to bounce D&D questions off of since he knows even more than I do) and it's wonderful. I'm really lucky to have someone like that who looks at me and doesn't think I'm crazy for writing all this Astarion stuff and instead beta reads my chapters and offers advice. 🥰❤️
14. How Do You Write Emotional Scenes? Do You Ever Feel What the Characters Feel? Do You Draw From Personal Experiences?
I answered this one in a previous ask, so I'll copy and paste it!: I love writing emotional scenes, they can be gut wrenching or joyful and I like to try and emulate what I'd feel when the characters I'm writing about are experiencing those things. I have a lot of angst history, unfortunately, but that's been great in helping me realize what happens to me when I go through those feelings. I like to touch on the senses- smell, sight, sound, touch, all of that. I try to immerse myself in it all like how a panic attack can leave you scattered and how your chest feels tight and that there's not enough breath in your lungs, or how a kiss can make you feel like there are butterflies in your stomach (cliche, but hey it happens) alongside the less glamorous descriptions of sweating profusely and feeling like everything is on fire. Emotional scenes weren't always my strong suit, but I've never looked at them through the lens of how I would feel in that moment, and doing so has really helped me improve.
17. What Do You Do When Writing Becomes Difficult? (Maybe a lack of inspiration or writers block)
I actually experienced my first bout of it this past weekend since really delving back into the hobby and it kind of freaked me out a bit. I used to experience it back in the past, but I don't remember how I fixed that... I didn't write again for 6 years so maybe it just needed a long rest? This past weekend I was visiting family so that may play a part in me staring at my laptop vacantly for 2 hours, because the space I was in wasn't usually one I wrote in but instead socially engage through. After watching some movies with my partner and taking the long drive back home, I came back and was able to write again though it was a rough start haha. It's hard for me to totally say- I don't have the most healthy of coping mechanisms for other things, so I really just hope and pray I don't feel like it again and go another 6 years without writing 😭
27. What is Your Most and Least Favorite Part of Writing?
My most favorite would be getting to a scene I've really been looking forward to and have put a lot of planning and thought into. It feels like I get possessed and thoughts aren't even getting past the thinking part- they're just going straight to the keyboard. I feel most in tune at that point, usually with some music and a cup of coffee and it's almost like drugs. Love that feeling! My least favorite? Probably when I start to get stuck... smut can be the bane of my existence here because while it's fun to write, and I know I'm beating a dead horse with this saying, using the same 3 words to describe a penis is not so fun lol. I have to get so creative and honestly smut fics are the hardest for me to write and get out because of the heavy editing I need to do to make sure they're polished. But alas, I love them too much to ever quit.
41. Do You Tend to Reread Fics or Are You a One-And-Done Kind of Person?
I'm a huge rereader. I have fallen in love with many fics that I have bookmarks of either just on my device or on AO3 and I love going back to them and reliving the feelings they gave me the first time. ❤️🫂
65. Tell Us What You're Most Looking Forward to Writing- In a Current Project or a Future Project.
I'm most looking forward to writing some Act 3 Orin stuff in With Stars to Fill My Dream as well as the epilogue I have planned! I've brainstormed a lot of ways I can keep Act 3 fresh, and I'll have some fun (the word fun is completely subjective/sarcastic) scenarios the tadpole gang will have to deal with before the end of the game. I also don't mind hinting at this bit either too much, but because Ofelia is only a bard, a certain Act 3 fight will be incredibly difficult for her to come out victorious in, so I plan to have her make a pact as well. She's lightly inspired by Ofelia from Pan's Labyrinth, and I have an excellent idea for who her patron will be and all the little details surrounding their first meeting. I'm actually so excited for this!
77. Do You Have a Favorite Scene You've Written from [With Stars to Fill my Dream] story/chapter?
I do!!! I really wish I could share it right now- it's from the tiefling party and it's the scene I originally imagined back when this fic was just a twinkle in the sky. I listen to a lot of music, and an old favorite of mine (Crazy on You by Heart) was on my playlist when I was thinking about potentially starting a fic for BG3. I didn't even plan to share it at the time, I just wanted a fun little isekai story to indulge in as I obsessed over the game, and I thought up a bard Tav singing to the group and party goers, and also to Astarion. That bard then became Ofelia, and thus WSTFMD was born. I wrote that scene a couple months ago and I'm honestly so happy with it- once it was finished I almost cried a little- it's amazing when an idea you never thought you'd actually put on paper comes out and then to not fuck it up and it sounds great too? Priceless ❤️ I can't wait to share it- it'll probably come out mid-November or beginning of December going off the update schedule, though my brain isn't working atm so I can't go in and make sure!
Thank you again for asking me these!!! I enjoy answering little questions 🫂🩵💙
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heya! :D was wondering if id be able to get a matchup from resident evil pls c: i hope im doing all of this right lol
im a straight female (she/her)
appearance: im 5’7”. im a light blonde, occasionally I’ll whack some brown or hot pink through the underneath when I’m bored of the plain one colour. im v into fashion and what not but my style varies day to day. i like to experiment with it. that being said, im usually here for anything that fits in the boxes of emo or hyper feminine though, as much as they contrast one another. 🤧 i wear a lot of makeup, and i do that purely for myself lol. I hate when people say they can’t even tell I’m wearing it considering it takes me sooo long haha. i have glasses but most of the time when i go out i wear contacts.
personality: to sum it up nicely, i never ever shut up. im very loud and extroverted. (the only exception to this is if I’m tired, then i go dead quiet.) humour is a big thing for me to be able to get on with someone. i have a very very strong moral code. i have a tendency to jump straight to people’s rescue if i see something wrong and I’m told that sometimes that gets me into more trouble than it’s worth. i try to be optimistic but i can be a massively emotional drama queen so it occasionally does fail tbh. i don’t exactly like bothering people with my problems either. im a creative person first and foremost. however, i have some “theoretical” intelligence yet completely, totally lack common sense. if you believe anything to do with star signs you will not be surprised to know im a sagittarius ‘:D
i don’t think i have a specific type. im not physically affectionate with friends but definitely would be with a partner. i like someone who knows how to flirt a little, maybe? and just like someone caring because kindness is such a huge thing for me.
i draw a ton, i make ocs and stories, i’ll throw myself headfirst into any artistic hobbies at least once to try it really. also, massively into music. listening to it anyway, i can’t play any instruments or anything. i love rock / pop punk bands, i love pop & kpop, i just… love music. a lot. i do everything with my headphones.
i believeeee that is all :p thank you for taking my request!
👍
== Resident Evil ==>
I match you up with…
Carlos Oliveira
Extrovert x Extrovert type beat
Carlos probably meets you while trying to stop you from throwing yourself into danger. He gets it, he really does, and he truthfully admires how you’ll fight tooth and nail for your beliefs, but leave the fighting to him for now, okay?
Don’t worry, he’ll teach you all about fighting if need be. He can see the desire to do good and to stand up for yourself, and he’s admittedly a bit flustered by your passion (it’s very attractive).
After getting in a relationship, he trusts you more to take care of both yourself and him, but he’s always on edge when you’re away, so you often come home to a big armful of man and his kisses and whispers about how much he misses you.
He’ll be the street smarts in this relatiponship, constantly watching your back and keeping track of you. Yet you surprise him with your creativity and problem solving enough that it sort of balances out?
He’s always ready to chat with you, whether it be about work or your thoughts and opinions on the most random of topics.
Carlos will enjoy time where just the two of you hang out and listen to music. I imagine you’ve got different tastes genre wise, but similar tonally. Sometimes you two go on a drive just to listen to some music and joke with one another.
He’s your savior, in more ways than one, but the feeling is absolutely reciprocated.
#oz’s requests#resident evil matchup#resident evil#resident evil x reader#carlos oliveria x reader#carlos oliveira
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ooc; TOA Anniversary Munday!
Celebrating TOA and the people who contribute to make our group what it is.
Repost, don't reblog. Only fill in what you feel comfortable sharing!
Happy anniversary, TOA! Here's to many more years spent together.
tagging: you! come closer
---
Name: Limit
Pronouns: they/them
Birthday (no year): March 8
Where are you from? What is your time zone? east coast usa, babey. i attend college out of state but i'll always be in EST
Roleplay experience: over a decade now if i get any more specific i'll wither away into dust
Got any pets? three dogs (australian shepherd, shiba, chihuahua mix) and a cat (marble)
Favorite time of year: fall
Some interests and things you like: i draw sometimes i suppose
Some funfacts & trivia about you: i had eight and a half wisdom teeth. doctors hate and/or are fascinated by me
What non-Fire Emblem games do you play? rhythm games, visual novels, mobage, rpgs
Favorite Pokemon type & Pokemon: is "canine" an acceptable pokemon type sdfkjhfkhfsdk. vulpix is my little guy
How did you get into Fire Emblem? saw awakening at gamestop and thought it looked interesting. my brother and i had just finished virtue's last reward so we named our robins phi and sigma haha
What Fire Emblem games have you played? Fe4-7, part of 8, 10, awakening, fates (not rev), three houses (academy phase only), like....an hour of SOV, and had part of engage streamed to me (+watched the dlc)
First Fire Emblem game: Awakening
Favorite Fire Emblem game: Binding Blade stockholm syndrome real
Any Fire Emblem crushes? i'm not really the type to crush on characters tbh
If you’ve played the following games, who was your first S support?
- Awakening: Chrom
- Fates: Keaton
- Three Houses: burnt out but the plan was dorothea or mercedes - Engage: maybe if my personal copy ever arrives lol
Favorite Fire Emblem class: dark mage(s) and myrms
If you were a Fire Emblem character, what would be your class? judging by the types i tend to like, a mage that just completely sucks ass JFHDKJHFDKJDF
If you were a Three Houses character, what would be your affiliation? golden deer??????
If you were an Engage character, which Emblem would you Engage with? the lyn writer is gonna say something totally surprising here and say lyn
How did you find TOA? thought it would be a funny bit to pull on n (it was)
Current TOA muses: Lyn and Sophia
Who was your first TOA muse? If you don’t have them anymore, could you see yourself picking them up again? Volug. He's snoozing now.
Have you had any other TOA muses? Miranda, who stands outside my door every since day
Do you think you have a type of character you gravitate towards? ........girls who have problems and issues LMFAOOOOO
What do you believe you enjoy writing the most? wouldn't you like to know weather boy
Favorite TOA-related memory: unscripted was my first event, so it'll always be special to me. lyn you'll always be famous for getting shot multiple times
How do you pronounce TOA? "toe-uh" and i stand by that
Got any delusions that didn’t see the light of day in TOA that you’d like to share? really want to write one of my diversity fliers one day
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Oooo okay. Long post lol, break for your poor dash space. May or may not have almost missed my train stop writing this oops
1 - which category of alterhumanity do you belong to?
I am a physical nonhuman and fictionhearted! ^-^
2 - what/who is/are your type(s)?
I'm a kitsune - the shrine guard variety. Tail count is somewhere between 5-7, i don't actually know and i don't normally like having more than one tail at a time. It's tiring and inocnvenient lol
My hearttype is lynette, from genshin impact.
3 - do you experience shifts? What about cameo shifts?
Uhhhh... no? I guess. I'm always fox, all the time. Sometimes my form is more in line with my human shell/vessel/whatever it is, but i'm always a bit uncanny at the very least. Phantom tail, always. Ears, teeth, claws, eyes almost always. Hind paws/legs and muzzle, often. Forepaws and the rest semi-often. I am never human though. I have some control over this, too. Usually i am an anthro fox, a little more feral than the average fursona.
I can go full fox when tired or stressed though. Classic kitsune behavior, noping out in fox form haha
Tails vary too but i almost always have one, to the point where I don't know the max amount.
Cameo shifts... i've had wings before, probably, though i have a hard time telling what's wing and what's just forepaws.
Occasionally i might have cameo shifts as lynette but i think that's just me mimicking her.
4 - how do you experience alterhumanity in everyday life?
Hard to answer. I don't know what it's like to be human. You could say everything i do is alterhuman-flavored.
I'm an outside observer to humanity. I find them fascinating and i generally quite like them, though dealing with them personally is both tough and a slog ngl.
And I don't like their rules. Or their being total jerks to nature. What do you mean i have to do stupid work things when i just wanna curl up between the roots of a wisened old pine tree?
5 - what do you think of the community?
Here on tumblr? Great. Elsewhere it gets... gatekeepy? Sometimes? Esp on tiktok eugh. And i feel like the pups these days have a lot more misconceptions about what alterhumanity even is.
Otherwise tho people are generally very nice and accepting. And i personally just like the fact that i can call my "hands" paws, "fingernails" claws and such without people looking at me weirdly. Not that i mind that too much, it's just nice to do that where it can't bother me at all.
Bonus points for a lot of interesting advice and perspectives. And fashion.
6 - what are the things that make you the most comfortable/euphoric?
It/its pronouns! They're fantastic and creaturey. I like them.
Well, i have gear, but I don't wear it much. For me it's filing my claws to make them look right and painting them black, and eating foods that remind me of things i would have had (give me mochi - just the mochi, no filling needed - and i will kill for you), dropping the human mask as much as i can, and so on. I like surrounding things with (ancient usually) japanese themes like games and decor, and also fox things. I'm learning japanese too, though slowly because i only have the one brain cell.
And i do arts. In this case it's paper mache fox masks and (very amateur) magic tricks, because what's a fox without illusions? (I have no stage presence it's terrible but hey, do stuff you're bad at sometimes). And yeah that last one is also helpful with connecting with lynette :>
Speaking of her i draw her a lot, and drink tea (and zone out). I actually have a version of her teacup and saucer i made at one of those pottery painting places, and tea and madeleines are super relaxing. Seriously make a cup of tea and zone out for a bit it's really nice!
I also have part of her cosplay (wig, ears, tail) and one day i'm gonna have the whole thing. It's just expensive bc my sewing capabilities are pretty limited.
7 - do you experience species dysphoria?
Not too much. Not being able to shapeshift is really annoying, and the human vessel is... not nearly as sharp or graceful as it should be. Its hearing is also rather disappointing. I also find it hard to emote well without my ears and tail being physical, as they... aren't visible, but I move them anyway. But ah well, i suppose there's a reason i'm like this...?
8 - what advice would you give to a newly-awakened young alterhuman?
Take your time. Don't feel forced to have all the answers right away. It took me years to figure out what i was, and i am ALWAYS fox. I still don't know many things.
It is also okay to change your labels. If you are, say, a wolf therian, but then discover being a shadow entity is more your speed, then it's okay to be not a wolf therian anymore. And you can have multiple 'types of multiple kinds, there is no limit.
And it is very important to be yourself. You do not have to wear gear or do quads or even discuss or express your identity much if you don't want to. Conversely it's ok to do things that many will consider "weird" or "cringe" - just don't hurt anyone or yourself of course. There are always gonna be people who don't like whatever it is, and trying to sanitize yourself for them is more trouble than it's worth. That goes for everything in life, honestly.
And being "closeted" is also ok. Like i said, no one has to know if you don't want them to.
Oh and also do your research please. Not just so that you don't fall for falsehoods, but also because there are just... so many creatures out there! Having a "common" 'type is perfectly ok, but don't limit yourself to just what you can think of off the top of your head :)
9 - do you have/want gear?
I have it. Don't usually wear it - it doesn't match up or move right, unfortunately. I do like the tail i have though, because when i'm standing it's the right size.
Will not stop making fox masks tho.
Also have a nice kitsune mask-patterened cloth mask with ear loops, a nose wire and a filter. Wear it to work, and elsewhere, because i work in an airport. It's nice and a little helpful even if the nose doesn't quite line up haha would recommend
10 - do you know/have any theories about the origin of your alterhumanity?
I don't know. I've been trying to piece it together. Part probably that i'm neurodivergent (many flavors - adhd for sure, id'd as gifted, who knows what else bc i can't be bothered to test); maybe where my hearttype came from. But fox? Not sure... it's spiritual, like, i'm here for a reason, i think. There's something i've gotta do i believe i'm just not sure what. And I don't meditate much because getting my brain to sit down and shut up is a bit difficult as you can imagine. Uhm... i might be dead? Or something?
11 - tag someone!
@arelenforyadarlin you're up if you haven't already! Sorry if this pings you twice with the reblog and/or you don't wanna :3 (and also for the l o n g)
If you are a alterhuman, reblog and answer these questions!
(don't be afraid to write a lot, do what you want ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)
1/ Which category of alterhumanity do you belong to?
2/ What/who is/are your type(s)? (if you have any)
3/ Do you experience shifts? If so, can you tell us your most common shifts and your strangest cameo shift (if you've ever had a cameo shift)?
4/ How do you experience your alterhumanity in everyday life?
5/ What do you think of the community?
6/ What are the things that make you most comfortable and euphoric in your alterhumanity?
7/ Are you experiencing species dysphoria?
8/ What advice would you like to say to a young alterhuman who has just awakened?
9/ Do you have/want to have gears?
10/ Do you know/have any theories about the origin of your alterhumanity? If so, tell us! (all beliefs are legitimate)
11/ Tag someone/a creature to answer these questions!ㅤᵕ̈
#alterhuman#alterbeing#kitsune nonhuman#physical nonhuman#holothere#fictionhearted#lynette fictionhearted
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