#totally didn’t tell you to go do this
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btw todd’s reluctance to join the dps because he doesn’t want to read (which is then accommodated for) and is scared to put himself out there (which is also worked through) being read as todd not wanting to go AT ALL, and thus neil making the proper accommodations (“todd anderson, who prefers not to read, will keep the minutes of the meetings”) and encouraging him to step out of the box that stifles him being seen as ‘forceful’ or like he can’t take no for an answer makes me insane with rage
#and him trying to stop neil from asking if todd not reading at the meetings is okay isn’t him wanting not to go#its him not wanting neil to ask because (as someone with social anxiety) it’s EMBARRASSING ASF for someone to ask for things on your behalf#literally just think about it as the meme of ‘when i tell my friend im hungry and he tells his mom that *i* want food instead of both of us’#and the whole ‘neil not knowing how to take no for an answer’ thing…… dont get me fucking started#the kid who’s had to take no for an answer his whole life? the kid whose first proper scene IS him taking no for an answer? are you serious?#being encouraging and accommodating and (admittedly) a little pushy when he’s got his mind set on something—#—is NAWT the same as not being able to take no for an answer or bulldozing through conversations with people#he and todd DO listen to each other in those conversations theyre just on opposing sides—#—because their understandings of the world don’t fully align at that point in time/the movie#which is totally fucking normal?????? because later on they DO properly align?????????#i feel so crazy about this every time i see someone say todd didn’t want to go the dead poets meetings because it’s so obvious he DID#he was just scared#and you know what maybe it IS a little forceful#but given how dedicated todd is to shutting off and hating and isolating himself he NEEDS a little forceful to be broken through to#if no one ever pushed me to do things when i was scared (as irritated as it can make me) i’d never do SHIT dude#and obviously todd is the same way because he ALL BUT OUTRIGHT SAYS AS MUCH#‘i appreciate this concern but i’m not like you’ IS about neil’s voice and opinions mattering to people but it’s ALSO about—#—him being outgoing and trying new things and putting himself out there#WHICH TODD WANTS TO BE ABLE TO DO!!!!!!!!#the moral you take away from todds growth is NOT that he has to change to be accepted because he DOESNT#its that he has to gain the confidence and belief in himself to grow and become the version of himself he WANTS to be#he NEVER changes on a fundamental level to make others happy (although his growth does make others happy) he just opens up more#and i dont know WHY some people think his arc is becoming a completely different person#like yall PLEASE#this isnt even an anderperry thing this is an issue even if you read them completely platonic#i blame the FUCKASS novelization…. dps book you will always be hated by ME#dps#dead poets society#neil perry#todd anderson
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fucking love being forced to take accountability and apologize for having emotions in a situation where my aunt is dying because evidently it’s never excusable to get angry when you’re pushed. it’s never fine to get upset when someone literally says to you ‘well we’ve all lost people’ when you mention that you’re losing your second mother.
#ooc. o kaptain.#negativity /#[me: well when someone says something like that what are you supposed to do just take it and move on???? my uncle: yeah that’s what life is.#i mean if you’re in the most toxic fucking situation imaginable yeah that sure is what life is?? ‘I’m isolating everyone’ because#when everyone is telling me what to do and refuses to acknowledge my grief. my brother literally asked ‘so when are you supposed to grieve’#and the answer is??? never you’re never supposed to you’re just supposed to traumatize yourself through an event and then wonder why the#grief is suffocating. except because you didn’t… process or talk about any of it? the fact that the concept of family to some extent is#like… share your accomplishments act like you like each other and then go home and live totally separate lives that don’t intersect until#the next holiday or tragedy. and i have been doing this by. my. self. but nah man no ones allowed to have a breaking point.#like you guys wonder why our aunt suddenly died and we all turned around and went OH MY GOSH???? it’s because idk no one encourages healthy#communication in this family. you hold in all your suffering until you fucking die and then everyone acts like it’s a devastating tragedy.]#death /
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even loves bill so so much which is why whenever bill assumes anything about them they go “🙂 yea. that’s true.” they love her. if you love someone, you lie to them.
even also (reluctantly, on his part, to be clear,) loves nardole, but nardole knows a lot more because nardole’s info about even comes through from the doctor. which makes it harder to lie to him. that doesn’t mean they don’t try.
#dw oc#👍 normal guy#they will obviously also do this to the doctor. because. he’s the doctor. he needs to be lied to.#depending on the subject he can smell the bullshit or he swallows it completely because he wouldn’t have thought to ask. but i think either#way he doesn’t. bring it up. at least not for a While. until the tension has built and he lashes out with it.#and the master of course. even tells them everything. if they actually listen. which isn’t always. but why would they bother to lie.#clara also this but it was much more about Correcting her when even could to get on her nerves Especially about doctor info even had and#clara didn’t and they totally were Not mad at or jealous of what she and twelve had going on. because they’re normal.#can’t you tell from them hanging onto missy like a crab in the bucket that they’re so normal
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i have a feeling my mom (who has acted extremely upset + sympathetic about me sweating profusely in my shitty 80+ degree room) is going to tell me that they can’t help me replace my 20+ year old ac unit for $250, even tho they are about to pay Thousands of dollars to replace their central ac bc clearly her needs are more important than mine (when one of my worst and most impactful symptoms is heat intolerance, which makes me dehydrated and even more dizzy and fatigued and i’ve been getting dehydration headaches even tho i’m drinking almost a gallon a day)
#like idk if it’s just the ptsd and i’m psyching myself out for nothing but i don’t feel good abt it#to the point of being extremely anxious abt asking her abt it and not knowing how to approach the convo not angrily#it’s just extremely frustrating bc i 100% Know my stepdad has the money to help me. if he says no it’s literally just bc he doesn’t like me#and cares more abt having retirement money than me not being even more ill and suicidal than i already am#Anyway i’ve been feeling like i’m being hunted for sport all day#and regardless i’m ordering it tomorrow bc i Cannot keep living like this and it’s a basic need#it would just be like half of the money i’ve worked to save up down the drain#and even longer until i can move out which i Desperately need to do at this point#idk man it’s just like. if they don’t offer to even help w Half of the cost i will have lost All trust in Her especially#bc 99% of the time she doesn’t give a single shit what that man thinks. she spends his money Constantly#literally in the past month she spent like $300 on a Bush Trimmer and a Chainsaw#she pays $200 monthly for an art studio that she barely uses#but ah yes my immediate safety and health is too much to ask for. totally understandable#just Extremely maddening when she constantly tells me that she’ll do Anything to help me and was like Why didn’t you tell me sooner????#abt my ac not working#like my brother in christ letting me bring a tower fan up to my room is not going to fix the situation 👍#ventnote
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Golden flame danced between her fingers.
Elide recoiled, and the fire vanished as quickly as it had appeared.
"My name is Essar," the female said softly. "I am a friend--of your friends, I believe."
Elide said nothing.
"Cairn is a monster," Essar said, taking a step closer. "Stay far from him."
"I need to find him."
"You played the part of his mistreated lover well enough. You have to know something about him. What he does."
"If you know where he is, please tell me." She wasn't above begging.
Essar ran an eye over Elide. Then she said, "He was in this city until yesterday. Then he went out to the eastern camp." She pointed with a thumb over a shoulder. "He's there now."
"How do you know?"
"Because he's not terrorizing the patrons of every fine establishment in this town, glutting himself on the coin Maeve gave him when he took the blood oath."
Elide blinked. She had hoped some of the Fae might be opposed to Maeve, especially after the battle in Eyllwe, but to find such outright distaste...
Essar then added, "And because my sister--the soldier you spoke with--told me. She saw him in the camp this morning, smirking like a cat."
"Why should I believe you?"
"Because you are wearing Lorcan's shirt, and Rowan Whitethorn's cloak. If you do not believe me, inform them who told you and they will." Elide cocked her head to the side.
Essar said softly, "Lorcan and I were involved for a time."
They were in the midst of war, and had traveled for thousands of miles to find their queen, and yet the tightness that coiled in Elide's gut at those words somehow found space. Lorcan's lover. This delicate beauty with a bedroom voice had been Lorcan's lover.
"I'll be missed if I'm gone for too long, but tell them who I am. Tell them that I told you. If it's Cairn they seek, that is where he shall be. His precise location, I don't know." Essar backed away a step. "Don't go asking after Cairn at other taverns. He isn't well regarded, even amongst the soldiers. And those who do follow him... You do not wish to attract their interest."
Essar made to turn away, but Elide blurted,
"Where did Maeve go?"
Essar looked over her shoulder. Studied her.
The female's eyes widened. "She has Aelin of the Wildfire," Essar breathed.
Elide said nothing, but Essar murmured, "That was... that was the power we felt the other night." Essar swept back toward Elide. Gripped her hands. "Where Maeve went a few days ago, I don't know. She did not announce it, did not take anyone with her. I often serve her, am asked to... It doesn't matter. What matters is Maeve is not here. But I do not know when she will return."
Relief again threatened to send Elide crumpling to the ground. The gods, it seemed, had not abandoned them just yet.
But if Maeve had taken Aelin to the outpost where they'd lied that the Valg prince had been contained...
Elide gripped Essar's hands, finding them warm and dry. "Does your sister know where Cairn resides in the camp?"
For long minutes, then an hour, they had talked.
Essar left and returned with Dresenda, her sister. And in that alley, they had plotted.
Elide finished telling Rowan, Lorcan, and Gavriel what she'd learned. They sat in stunned silence for a long minute.
"Just before dawn," Elide repeated. "Dresenda said the watch on the eastern camp is weakest at dawn. That she'd find a way for the guards to be occupied. It's our only window."
Rowan was staring into the trees, as if he could see the layout of the camp, as if he were plotting his way in, way out.
"She didn't confirm if Aelin was in Cairn's tent, though," Gavriel cautioned. "Maeve is gone--Aelin might be with her, too."
"It's a risk we take," Rowan said. A risk, perhaps, they should have considered.
Elide glanced to Lorcan, who had been silent throughout. Even though it had been his lover who had helped them, perhaps guided by Anneith herself. Or at least had been tipped off by the scent on Elide's clothes.
"You think we can trust her?" Elide asked Lorcan, though she knew the answer.
Lorcan's dark eyes shifted to her. "Yes, though I don't see why she'd bother."
"She's a good female, that's why," Rowan said.
At Elide's lifted brow, he explained, "Essar visited Mistward this spring. She met Aelin." He cut a glare toward Lorcan. "And asked me to tell you that she sends her best."
Elide hadn't seen anything that came close to pining in Essar's face, but gods, she was beautiful. And smart. And kind. And Lorcan had let her go, somehow.
#Chapter 23#Kingdom of Ash#Sarah J. Maas#Elide Lochan#Essar#HoF#Heir of Fire bonus Chapter#TOG series#Throne of Glass series#another great Maasverse enterance — aka one of my favs in these books & this one got me — totally adding the chapter myself when I get HoF#no spoilers please first read to read along with me Pt3 of 4 perspectives w quotes/notes/reacts in tags below spoilers in both post & tags#Elide talking about keeping them safe even if at the prospect of Maeve’s hands which is worse than death yet Aelin did for months😭🖤#Rowans I did 2 weeks-shit-hurry & you didn’t break even when she feels she did-but she literally had Maeve in her head for months & didnt#To shield them from any eyes--those on the ground and above. — the raptors — Elides got a knife ok girl😅😂 but when they halted once more…?#Golden flame danced between her fingers. — AGHHHHHHHHHHHHH#My name is Essar the female said softly. I am a friend--of your friends I believe. — YES YES YES HOLY FUCKING SHIT FIRE WEILDER HOF AH#Cairn is a monster Essar said taking a step closer. Stay far from him. —she doesnt know who she’s just being kind I knew I liked her#how does Maeve not know about her? or does she? is that an issue with the fire? hmm… also does the color change per wielder? we need more!!#If you know where he is please tell me. She wasn't above begging. — for Aelin😭#Because you are wearing Lorcan's shirt and Rowan Whitethorn's cloak. If you do not believe me inform them who told you and they will.#They were in the midst of war and had traveled for thousands of miles to find their queen and yet the tightness that coiled in Elide's gut#I'll be missed if I'm gone for too long but tell them who I am. Tell them that I told you.-cairn u seek he shall be-ok riddler😅#Don't go asking after Cairn at other taverns. He isn't well regarded even amongst the soldiers. — well at least they all agree on that#The female's eyes widened. She has Aelin of the Wildfire Essar breathed. — how did she know? Rowan being there (cuz clearly love)?#Aelin of the Wildfire — the regard That was... that was the power we felt the other night. — what doesn’t matter?#Relief again threatened to send Elide crumpling to the ground. The gods it seemed had not abandoned them just yet.#Just before dawn Elide repeated. Dresenda said the watch on the eastern camp is weakest at dawn.-Dawn?Mala?the sister?! I love Essar!#Lorcan’s ex lovers oh sweet Elide😅😭🖤 then the she’s a good woman&met Aelin that’s why cuz they all luv her&the risk we take&Elides 1 line😂#yet he didn’t let you go Elide TAKE NOTE OF THAT BABES#We all go in. We all go out. — and so they planned…
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i do love my family very dearly but the internalized ableism the men in here struggle with is. so much
#marzi speaks#it’s worse with my brother but he’s doing more to actively work on improving that#my dad however has very subtle internalized ableism that i don’t think he recognizes is there#which is. fun#like earlier. either last night or this morning i don’t remember#i was talking to him about how while ideologically i have nothing against accepting needing help and things like that#in practice it’s very challenging to adjust to being disabled even temporarily. and that if i do end up with a diagnosis that’s gonna be#a lot to handle. both mentally and just with the lifestyle changes i’ll have to make#and he makes a bit of a face and goes ‘i wouldn’t quite call you disabled. i’d just say ‘ill’’#and i just sort of look at him. and i blink. and i go ‘i am physically Un-Able to do things i am normally able to do’#‘i can’t walk long distances at all. i can’t sit in chairs for too long without causing pain’#‘i’ve spent the last 24 hours staring longingly at my computer because i want to draw but am currently Not Able To’#he didn’t argue with me but i can tell he was still unnerved by the idea of picturing his daughter as disabled#also like . illness and disability are not mutually exclusive? several disabilities are or involve chronic illness#i shouldn’t be surprised though. i mentioned considering starting lexapro#and he went on his ‘you’re an adult and it’s your choice in the end but i wouldn’t recommend it’ spiel#(he’s anti-psychiatry bc he doesn’t like the idea of breaking the brain down into smth so purely physical)#(and also doesn’t like the idea of someone being dependent on pills their whole life)#(which i’m giving him some slack on rn bc he is a just-got-clean recovering opoid addict. so)#(btw before any of you say SHIT abt my dad he took his pills legally prescribed for chronic pain and did not abuse them)#(and even if he DID that would give nobody a right to make a moral judgement on him. ok cool)#i then reminded him that my mom takes anti-anxiety meds and they really really helped her#and he just goes ‘true.’ and moves on#king u got some shit to unpack#it’s fine if u didn’t want to start antidepressants when it was recommended to you meds aren’t for everyone#but like come on now. u don’t gotta be so fundamentally against it when literally ur own wife who you adore takes psych meds#anywho my mom handled me making the disability comment much better. she was basically just like ‘ur fear is totally understandable’#‘u have a good support system we’ll help you through it’#which. thanks mom 👍 that was very kind of her to say
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Do you ever have a thought while scrolling your dash and then forget it so you gotta back scroll to find your thought again or is it like, just a me thing
#I was thinking about the WoL being a different guy for every expansion again but also more crucially#I’m re reading Amygdala by Sam Fennah and I’m caught in the time loop. this time the outcome will be different… this is gonna be its own#post actually hold on#day-2-day#edit; changed my mind#anyways my girl did do all that shit wrong but she didn’t deserve it hope that helps xoxo#if I name drop anyone it’ll spoil the story so I’m begging you to read it and then tell me about how I’m not crazy and there’s totally#toxic Yuri potential between Methusa and Winifred. there’s a scene in Bernadette that makes me wanna chomp cables#Bernadette being the music video posted by Sam Fennah on YouTube Pls go watch it I’m unwell#hi sorry it’s not Winifred it’s Locket sorry to women I mixed them up. I’d been looking at Wini earlier and being all 😳🫣🥴
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someone really should be talking about how difficult it is to plan a wedding - a gay wedding - when both of your families fucking suck
#who is talking about this!!!! let me know#idk i have 0 expectations for my family but they still somehow always manage to let me down which#i was anticipating#and i didn’t think i would care because i have never cared before#but liiiiiike.#i wasn’t expecting to feel sad rofl but my family is so fucking flaky. again i KNOW THIS i know i cannot rely on any of them#it’s annoying when i have given them a year and a half to make plans and i have had so many people tell me they would be there#just to back out or ghost or come up with some excuse#like do you know how expensive weddings are 😭 JUST fucking be honest with me and rsvp no#anyway i was very intentional with the few family members i did invite#and specifically invited people i have a rapport with / had a good (ish lol) relationship with growing up#people i have bent over backwards trying to please!!! and dropping everything to help them out#and they can’t even be bothered to communicate with me lol it’s fine. like. i do feel like it’s internalized homophobia at this point#or maybe they have hated me this entire time which is totally plausible#but they KNOW how much ayesha means to me and knows that no one from her family is coming to our wedding#at the end of the day it’s going to be like. 5 people from my family 1 from ayesha’s (her brother) and like 30-40 friends#which i am so grateful for obviously#i sound like such a brat but it’s also like - watching your family continuously choose drugs/alcohol over showing up for you - lol#AGAIN i’m used to this and expected as much but i’m still feeling bad#just rsvp so i can move on with my life please. stop telling me you’re trying to make it work when we both know you aren’t#i have so much more to say but i’m going to sound crazy even though i knooooow it is homophobia like i Know it#i think there are certain people i will finally go no contact with for good after this#which is a freeing thought but i only invited v few family members to begin with. there’s abt to be no one left lmao#probably for the best#ugh whatever#again i can’t help but feel a certain way when they have done more/traveled further for relatives they hardly know#meanwhile i was forced to spend so much of my life living for these people and for them alone#AAAAAAAA i just want to scream#text
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Just a reminder to new artists or anyone feeling down about their art not looking as good as other artists: This is barely two years apart, you’re really not as far away from progress as you think!
#Keep going and keep taking inspiration from other artists#see their styles as a benchmark to strive towards instead of something to be disheartened by.#I believe in you!!#(ノ>ω<)ノ :。・:*:・゚’★。・:*:♪・゚’☆#and when I tell you it didn’t matter what motivates you to strive and improve know I really mean it#my art improvement has been powered by jealousy and pride#and spite#it’s ok to see another artist and your first thoughts be “’duck you for being better than me#I’m gonna be better than you. I’m gonna do it#fucking watch me!’#and then hype that artist up and sing their praises so that they can continue to make their infuriating#wonderful art. so that when you get to their level (and bEAT THEM AT ART!) something totally normal to want and possible to achieve :)#you can know that you did it while that artist was at their very best.#a victory is only a victory if your opponent is at their best after all.#art#drawing#artwork#bunny deku#midoriya izuku#bnha#Deku
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when can i stop getting le sserafim hate tiktoks on my fyp it’s getting old :)
#it’s totally cool to have your opinions and yeah they really didn’t do that great at coachella#but truly what is being an asshole on the internet about it gonna do#‘but its their job to sing and dance at the same time they shouldn’t be bad at it’ ok so don’t buy tickets to go see them idk#if you don’t like smth then don’t consume that media idk what to tell u#i also thought they needed improvement but like some of these people are SO mean and nasty 💀
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i’m fr gonna lose my mind :)
#been a minute since i’ve ranted in the tags on here hi hello#so i have this friend who is driving me absolutely insane#we’ve been friends for about a year or so and when we first met we clicked right away and got super close and hung out all the time#we met at work but neither of us works there anymore and it feels like our whole friendship is falling apart now that we don’t#i literally have not seen her in person once since the last time we worked together (march)#and even before that we didn’t hang out outside of work since december of last year#and i have grown very used to having friends that just do not put the same amount of effort as me into our friendships and it’s sucks#so i was starting to make my peace with the fact that we just weren’t really friends anymore#but then a few months ago she started texting me asking me to hang out all the time and she seemed way more like her old self#and immediately i got sucked back in and was all excited to see her again and have her back in my life fully#but she completely flaked on me three times in a row (not even cancelling our plans but waiting until the next day to give me an excuse)#which like i said i’m unfortunately used to but she literally was the one who invited ME to hang out every time#like why are you initiating plans with me and then ignoring my calls and texts when it comes time to actually hang out#then a few weeks ago she texted me again saying we should go to a concert together bc we hadn’t in a long time#and there happens to be a concert i’ve been wanting to go to on the 31st but had no one to go with#she said she was totally in and really excited and i bought the tickets a couple days later and texted her to tell her i had#got zero response for almost a week and then she texted me yesterday saying we should hang out this week#so i said yeah let’s do it but also this concert is literally in 2 days are you still coming with me#and no response! again! so now i have 2 days to try and find someone else who can go last minute bc it seems unlikely that she will#and i’m just so fucking confused bc why do YOU keep reaching out to ME just to flake out at the last minute every single time#like at this point it feels like she’s doing it on purpose just to see if i’ll keep tolerating her bullshit#and part of me wants to just cut her off bc she’s been a terrible friend to me for months at this point#but i can’t bring myself to do it bc i miss her so much anyway and when our friendship was good it was really fucking good#like i considered this girl one of my best friends and now it feels like she’s just playing games with me bc she’s bored#which sucks extra bc last year she was there for me when literally none of my long time friends were#like it’s bad enough that it seems like our friendship was conditional on us being coworkers#but it hurts more and more every time she reappears in my life just to ghost me again like genuinely why would you do that#so i’m really upset and pissed off rn and i have no idea wtf to do about the concert bc idk anyone else who likes the artist enough to go#vent#lj.txt
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an unnecessary reminder i will go to bat any day of the week for james sunderland.
#ooc. o kaptain.#[listen. i know he can be interpreted a lot of ways. i know he’s a useless weird apathetic shitty cis white man. i know he’s weird and sad.#and do I hate characters like james usually? oh absolutely. but the man has potential to not be terrible and it’s all there in his source#material. plus the weird implication i always feel when we know his dad owns the apartment building in silent hill 4 and ‘his son and#daughter in law disappeared in sh’ which aligns with the in water ending. and confirms the body in the car. but my other vibe is… where was#anyone helping james while Mary was sick…? he was super young and so was she. was he just literally taking on this terminal illness on his#own without any real support? that’s the implication considering this trauma wouldn’t have scarred him to this degree if he HAD a support#system during Mary’s illness. the man was literaly left to deal with the love of his life PROBABLY newly married slowly dying. and totally#unprepared he tried to do the best he could with a horrible situation. Mary was the victim here unquestionably — he fucking killed her— but#what the fuck kind of neglect has to go into a situation to a level so prolonged that he cracks and does it? how many people DIDNT help him#OR Mary during her illness? how many people just didn’t care? deciding ‘James is bad and he did it because he’s selfish and terrible’ isn’t#realistic. and also no. he didn’t do it because he couldn’t have sex with her anymore we get it blah blah pyramid head. if you take it THAT#straightforward idk what to tell you. nothing is. and this game is only more complex the older i get.]
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like, I still think it’s sort of weird that Shonda Rhimes bought the rights to the Bridgerton novels, did a mediocre job at adapting the material and also kinda ruined one of the most popular pairings from the books in the process, and then proceeded to hyperfixate on her own OC to the point of creating a spin-off in which the central romance is about two members of a very white, slave-owning, racist and imperialist institution that could only maintain power through the exploitation of people of color all over the world, but now the protagonist is a black woman who’s about to end racism in 1700s Great Britain through the power of Love
#i just… genuinely think it’s weird is all#like she totally didn’t have to do any of that#she could’ve easily pulled a still star crossed and say ‘this is the world; it is diverse; deal with it’#and it totally would’ve worked#but now shonda is explicitly asking me to think of the implications so i AM thinking of the implications#and the implications are HORRIBLE#you mean to tell me one of the richest and most influential women of the time is sitting on her ass obsessing over gossip#while thousands of black people are being kidnapped and sold as slaves in america#what is going on in the whole continent of africa??? or in countries like india or china???#is charlotte like ‘oh well those poor people of africa sure have it rough and my kingdom is directly reaping the benefits of that oppression#but also my hubby just gave a bunch of non-white people from london noble titles#so that’s it <3 systemic racism is over <33#now back to lady whistledown’#bc that would make her… y’know… a shitty person….#and before anyone goes ‘it’s fiction it’s not that serious’#i know but shonda IS directly asking me to think about it with this show so! i! will!#anyways i’ll still watch the whole thing because i have no backbone whatsoever but…. i will have thoughts about it#also for anyone wondering the pairing that was ruined is obviously polin#and kanthony to an extent which is criminal if you ask me#i mean rmb is still my favorite jq book so i’m still somewhat looking forward seeing season 3#but like. penelope. look how they massacred my girl#…..oh wow i went overboard with the tags. but i’m right#queen charlotte#bridgerton#queen charlotte a bridgerton story#bridgerton books#julia quinn#stfu pam
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Getting fucked over by the narrative gotta be my favorite form of pain and suffering
#How do I convince people to watch a show where teen girls who just want to do teen girl stuff and go to nationals#but then shit happens and suddenly there’s a cult but their god is just a girl and she tries to tell them she is just a girl and#they are starving so they HAVE to eat and the girlfriends have a fight and she kinda died but like the wilderness chose and#I am so normal about this show it totally didn’t change my life narrative and become my hyper fixation#oh Nat taisa van and Lottie the characters you are !!! misty and Shauna too#Anyways watch Yellowjacket’s PLEASE I need to speak about it !!!!!!!!!!#this is about yellowjackets but literally about anything and everything else too#yellowjackets#I watched this in like. a day. I am sick. I need ten more seasons
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Hey. Did you know that some people had wished an Elena of Avalor episode that is like an Avatar: The Last Airbender episode The Tales of Ba Sing Se? It would have been great that the EoA had an episode like that (divided into chapters focusing on one or two main characters). I'm not asking you to make a fic based on what I said, but imagine something like this. There can be Elena, Isabel, Esteban, Naomi, Mateo and... GABE. Think about this, okay? Take care.
Yep, it sounds like a cool idea! It never crossed my mind in the context of the EoA, though, but I think I can save it for later.
#Ask me anything#….Naomi Mateo and…#GABE#XD#Sorry it made me giggle#You know me well I see haha#Although wait#no#I did have quite a similar idea#No idea what title it had but I had an idea for the pre-canon episode telling Gabe Mateo and Naomi’s stories under Shuriki#So the four amigos had a sleepover and for absolutely no reason they realized damn we barely know anything about each other’s pasts#So they decided to share short stories from their childhoods#Naomi told about how her family was going to move in Avalor and she was wondering whether she would like this place#Mateo told about how he discovered the basement under his house and came across all those magical books#and Gabe told about his fencing training with his coach who threw coconuts at him#Once they finished they all turned their heads towards Elena to ask her what she was doing under Shuriki#and they regretted it because they totally forgot she was trapped in the amulet and Elena just awkwardly rubbed her neck or whatever#After that they all except Elena fell asleep and she was wandering around the castle fearing what was awaiting her and her kingdom#since this ‘episode’ was supposed to take place after Naomi Knows Best and she didn’t have her scepter then#And they all got to sing!#Naomi’s song was called Another New Home Mateo’s was Magical Destiny Gabe’s was Keep Fighting and Elena’s was My Fears#Yeah very creative titles I know XD#Writing all the coolest things in the tags is my curse and I can’t break it#I won’t even apologize because I’m the only one who gets harmed by it aihsjfkf
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Giving the nerd a chance
tags: nerd!nanami/fem!reader, college!au, stsg, nsfw, dirty talk, asphyxiation, size kink, mdni!!
a/n: this one’s a long one :) pace yourself and enjoy!
Kento Nanami is a social enigma. He is a total outlier but in the weirdest way possible.
This man is conventionally attractive. Some would even go as far to say Nanami’s handsome, almost in a filthy way. His looks are sneaky too. He’s not someone you’d immediately notice in a room, but once you did…
You would notice his sculpted jaw line first. Then, his naturally high cheekbones that gave way to his soft hazel eyes. He had a serious look on his face always, but his eyes told a different story. Maybe you’d notice his blonde hair that sat neatly on his head, styled with an undercut. Yeah, Nanami was fucking hot.
But that’s not the weird part. No, you haven’t heard him utter a single word except to answer the professor’s unanswered questions once the silence was unbearable.
That’s not exactly weird either. There are tons of people who go through college without the intention of making friends… but Nanami has friends. He doesn’t just have like one friend. No, he’s apart of a friend group.
The weirdest part was he seemed to be close with the most popular guy in your university, star quarterback Satoru Gojo. Gojo was seemingly every college girl’s wet dream. He’s the type to stand out in a room. His looks and personality demand attention.
He’s the complete opposite from Nanami.
Then, there was Suguru Geto… Geto was also a strange friend for Nanami to have. Geto was smart, funny, and well-mannered… when he was in class. But you’ve seen how Geto acts at parties. He smokes cigarettes, shotguns whiskey, and keeps up with all of Gojo’s antics. Shoko was the exact same way, except she didn’t care enough to keep up with Gojo’s buffoonery.
They were the complete opposite from Nanami as well.
Yu Haibara was a cutie patootie. He’s also a sweet social butterfly. Another one of Nanami’s friends that just didn’t seem to be his type.
You caught yourself staring at the friend group as you’re sitting on a couch at a frat house. Your college team just won the game, so Satoru had invited a whole slew of people over. You somehow made it on that list. Your friend, Utahime, is begging you to leave, but something is telling you to stay.
“Go on without me, Uta. I’ll be fine, promise.” You say over the music as you flash her a small smile to assure her.
“I really, really, really don’t want to leave you here alone, yn. I don’t want you to end up on the front page of the news.”
“Don’t wish that shit upon me.” You laugh as you gently nudge her arm, urging her towards the door.
“I’m serious, yn. Please text me. If you’re not back in the dorm by midnight, I’m calling the cops.” She says as she grabs your shoulders, forcing you to face her directly.
You admire your friend’s caring demeanor, but she was being a total cock block for you right now.
“I will text you. I promise.” You assure her once again. “Go back to the dorm. Love you.”
She sighs deeply as she lets you go. She’s still not comfortable with the idea of leaving you here, but she can’t force you to leave. “Love you too. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”
“Oh, that’s all I’m gonna do.” You smirk as she flips you off and leaves the frat house.
You take a drink from your red solo cup to gather your nerves. Nanami has been sitting in the corner of the kitchen all night. He’s alone, but he doesn’t look lonely. Sometimes, Satoru will drunkenly slouch his weight onto the blonde and slur something inaudible to him. From what you can see, Nanami just rolls his eyes and shrugs his friend off his shoulders.
You want to approach him, but you’re still too afraid he won’t talk to you. As you sit down your cup, an intoxicated Satoru is standing over you.
“I’m sorry- I don’t remember your name.” He gives you a slanted smile as he crouches down a bit so you two are face-to-face.
“That’s okay. I don’t remember yours either.” You snip back with a small grin. Something sparkles in his eyes as you give him a little bit of a challenge. He finds it to be endearing.
“Cheeky. Give me your number.” He demands, keeping his smirk on his face.
“Why should I give it to you?”
“Because it’s not for me.” He slurs as he leans in close to you. He nods his head towards the kitchen. “I’m doing this for my pussy friend over there.”
Your eyes dart towards Nanami. His eyes are glaring holes into Satoru with more anger and emotion than you’ve ever seen from him. Your stomach swirls with butterflies.
“That is a really good reason.” You murmur as you quickly type your number into Satoru’s phone.
*** *** ***
It had been days since the frat party and not a single word from Nanami. Your excitement had honestly fizzled out into sulking. Were you not good enough for him? Did Satoru lie? Was it all a sick prank?
Not even Utahime could get you in a good mood.
“Yn. This is so ridiculous. If you like him that much, just go up and talk to him.” She chides
“Noooo.” You groan into your pillow as you turn onto your stomach in your bed. “He’s too cool. Out of my league.”
“Are you sure we’re talking about the same Kento Nanami? The nerd who barely ever talks? The know-it-all in class?”
“Utahimeee.”
“You’re embarrassing yourself.”
“Let me wallow in my self pity.” You gripe before you hear your phone buzz. The sound of your phone notifying you doesn’t even excite you anymore. It’s always some lame ass notification.
Unknown Number: Is this yn?
Your eyes widen as you stare at your phone in disbelief. Your body involuntarily sits up in bed, startling Utahime.
“Jesus Christ. What? What happened?”
“He texted me!” You beam proudly. You are embarrassing. Utahime scoffs and walks away from you, unable to take the second-hand embarrassment.
Yn: Yeah, that’s me :)
Unknown Number: This is Kento Nanami. I’m sorry Gojo felt the need to disturb you at the party. 
Yn: No need! He didn’t disturb me too much.
Nanami: That’s good to hear.
God. Now, what do you say? Of course Nanami is a dry texter. You stare at the text conversation for a while, trying to think of something.. anything to break the ice.
Yn: Did you ask him to get my number, or did he do that on his own volition?
Nanami: Gojo does things on his own volition.
Yn: Ah.. I see.
He left you on read.
Goddammit.
You had your chance, and now, you blew it. Sighing, you lock your phone and try to forget he even ever texted you in the first place.
*** *** ***
I mean, who even needs Nanami? He’s really not even that handsome or mysterious. You keep telling yourself as you get ready to go to another party Gojo invited you too.
Oh, also, Gojo kept your number for himself as well. He mostly asked to copy your notes when Nanami refused to let him copy his notes. He would also send the occasional invitation to one of his signature parties.
This one was apparently labeled as “exclusive”. You had no idea what that meant, but you weren’t allowed to bring a plus-one this time.
Luckily for you, Utahime was visiting back home for the weekend, so she couldn’t scold you for going out to another party this weekend.
Black eyeliner was smeared across your waterline, and you puckered your lips as you carefully applied some sheer gloss. You decided to be casual with your outfit, wearing a basic off-shoulder black top with some jeans.
As soon as you got to the frat house, you quickly understood what “exclusive” meant. It was only their closest friends in the house. Satoru and Haibara were on the couch, lounging. Suguru and Shoko were sitting by the window, sharing a cigarette. Nanami was sitting in a chair in the corner of the room, looking as stoic as ever. Immediately, you were grateful for going with a more casual look.
“Yn! So glad you made it!” Satoru grinned in a more sober voice than the last time you spoke with him.
“Am I imposing on something?” You ask as you close the door.
“Of course not, silly. I sent you an invite for a reason.” Satoru says casually as he pats the spot between him and Haibara on the couch. “Come have a seat. Get comfortable. We’re just hanging out tonight.”
You stare at the seat between Gojo and Haibara, and you decide to sit in the open chair next to them instead.
“Afraid that we might bite?” Gojo grins as he leans over the arm of the chair towards you.
“Stop it, Satoru. You’re going to scare her away.” Shoko scolds before taking a drag off her cigarette.
Your phone gently buzzes in your pocket as Satoru and Shoko begin to bicker about his social skills. You sneakily check your phone.
Nanami: You look pretty tonight.
OH. We are so back, baby.
Yn: Thank you :) You look as handsome as ever.
Nanami: Oh yeah?
It is so small and insignificant, but that little “oh yeah?” makes your stomach flutter with excitement.
“Yn?” You snap your attention up to Shoko and realize she has been trying to talk to you.
“Shit- sorry. What’s up?”
Your phone lightly buzzes again, and you quickly glance down to check.
Nanami: You’re blushing.
“I was asking what your major is.” Shoko smiles calmly as she’s sat upon the windowsill. She flicks her cigarette outside before blowing out a cloud of smoke. You try to ignore how your heart is skipping beats right now.
“Oh, I’m just in general studies right now. I’m kind of indecisive. What about you?”
“I’m pre-med right now.” Shoko answers.
“I thought you swapped to nursing.” Haibara asks as he shifts his body to face her. The two start conversing together, giving you a chance to check your phone.
Nanami: Are you ill, or do my words just affect you that much?
Yn: I’m actually ill.
Nanami: You’re also apparently a liar, sweetheart.
How the fuck was this man so bold over text, but wouldn’t speak to hardly anyone in person?
Yn: Sweetheart? I didn’t know we were on that sort of level yet.
Nanami: Does that make you uncomfortable?
Yn: No
Nanami: Good. Then don’t complain.
The throb your cunt just did should’ve been illegal. There was no reason for you to be so turned on by that, but you were.
Yn: What would you have done had I said that it did make me uncomfortable?
Nanami: I would’ve found you a nickname you were more comfortable with.
He was being sweet, and you were over there clenching around nothing like a whore.
You had been so caught up in your phone that you didn’t realize Yu had went and gotten everyone a beer out of the fridge. You decide to risk a glance at Nanami. He looked calm and composed. You wondered if he even knew the effect he had on you truly.
“Shoko, when are you finally going to get some bitches?” Satoru asks with a laugh. Your eyes widen as you notice Suguru is on his lap now. You had really been so distracted by your phone…
“At this rate, I think Nanami will beat me.” Shoko laughed as she took a drink of her beer. You shift slightly in your seat as Shoko cuts her eyes towards you with a small grin.
Nanami: I will
Yn: Will what?
Nanami: I will beat her.
Yn: Confident or competitive?
Nanami: Both.
Yn: You didn’t strike me as the type.
Nanami: You don’t think I can do it?
Yn: I never said that.
Nanami lays his phone on his lap, and you can feel his eyes trailing up and down your body. Feeling your heart skip a beat, you decide to look up at him. Your breath hitches in your throat as you glance over him. He looks relaxed. His head is propped up in his hand, and he’s almost giving you a lazy smile.
Knowing more about Nanami, you recognize it as a cocky smile now.
The rest of the “party” goes without a hitch. You decided it was time to leave once Suguru and Satoru were obnoxiously making out, Shoko was asleep on the floor, and Haibara wouldn’t shut the fuck up about the intricacies of anime.
“I’m gonna head back to my dorm now. Thanks for inviting me.” You say quickly as you stand from your seat.
“Hey yn-!” Satoru says as he tugs from Suguru’s lips. The dark-haired male made quick work of moving down to his neck. “Thanks for coming. You should come out here more often.”
“Oh um, I’ll think about it.” You smile politely as you head out the front door. The cold night air nips at your skin. The only light was from the moon high up in the sky. The dorms were a few blocks away.
You never like walking alone at night, but you try to remember that college campuses have security patrolling at all times. Taking a deep shaky breath, you step off the porch.
The sound of the door closing again immediately startles you. You quickly flinch and look towards the frat house. Nanami was calming walking up to you.
“Let me walk you back.” His voice was calm and steady, just like his presence. He really wasn’t phased at all by your subtle flirting earlier?
“Thanks.. I was actually kinda scared.” You mumble as you two walk side by side on the pavement. Your arms hug your body, trying to hide from the snippy air.
“Why didn’t you ask one of us to walk you home then?” Nanami asks as he slips his coat off from his shoulders. He then loosely drapes it over your shoulders. You feel your heart skip a beat as you mumble a quick thanks. Your body snuggled into his coat as it swallowed your frame whole. It was the first time you realized… Nanami is a big man. He’s not just some scrawny nerd. He’s actually pretty well built.
“I didn’t want to be a bother.” You answer quietly, noticing how Nanami shoves his hands into his pockets while you two walk.
“That’s foolish. We invited you. The least we could do is make sure you make it home safely.”
“We?”
Nanami goes silent, and he looks away from your shorter self. The wind blows harshly, making the leaves crinkle and hiss on the trees.
“Yes, we.” He finally answers your question. You smile softly as you look down towards the ground. It seems like Satoru wasn’t the only one who wanted you around.
Standing in front of your dorm door, you slowly slip the coat off from around your shoulders and try to hand it back to him. “I don’t want it.” He answers calmly, making no effort to take the jacket back from you.
“It’s yours, silly.”
“And?”
“Take it.” You gestured the coat to him once more
“No, I want you to have it.” He says as he towers over you. You subconsciously take a step back to create space, and your back hits the door. He leans over you, having to angle his back to see eye-to-eye with you. You can feel his warm breath ghosting over your cheek as he cocks his head towards your ear and neck. “Text me.” He murmurs lowly before pressing a soft kiss to your cheek.
You were left against your door blushing madly as he casually sauntered away.
*** *** ***
You almost think you dreamt that kiss up come Monday morning. You hadn’t texted him all weekend, not even knowing what to say. You felt scared about messing things up and taking his advances the wrong way. He hadn’t reached out to you either.
You were sitting in Neurology, half-ass paying attention as the professor lectured about neuron pruning. Nanami sat a few rows over. He always appeared to he intently listening when you glance over at him. You perk up as you feel your phone buzz on your thigh.
Nanami: You’re not going to do well if you don’t pay attention.
Yn: I could say the same for you.
Nanami: Could you?
Yn: …. point taken
Nanami: You know, you could’ve at least texted me if you didn’t like the kiss.
Yn: Who said I didn’t?
Nanami: So, you disobey my request for fun?
Yn: Disobey is such a strong word. You told me to text you, and I just.. haven’t yet.
Nanami: We’ll come back to the disobedience topic. Why haven’t you texted me “yet”?
Yn: Nervous.
Nanami: You’re adorable. What’s there to be nervous about?
“Can anyone name an example of synaptic pruning?” The professor’s sudden loud voice catches you off guard. You hadn’t been paying attention at all, and you feel your heart start to race at the thought of being randomly called upon.
“Anyone?” The professor asks once again. “Yn-“ She almost says your first name before Nanami interrupts.
“Crown thinning.” He answers the question, saving you from total embarrassment.
“Very good. Thank you, Kento.” The professor praises as she turns back around to start lecturing from the powerpoint again.
Yn: You totally just saved me.
Nanami: Pay better attention.
Yn: Then stop texting me.
Nanami: No.
Nanami: Answer my question. Why were you nervous?
Yn: I just didn’t want to say the wrong things.
Nanami: You’re hopeless.
Yn: You’re starting to sound like Utahime :(
Nanami: Will you coo to me that you love me if I act like her?
You feel your heart start to race as you read his text over and over. He was way more observant than you gave him credit for. You couldn’t even think of a time where you told Uta that you loved her in front of him.
Yn: Is that what you want?
Nanami: That does sound nice. Though, I think I’d rather hear you breathlessly professing your love to me.
oh…
oh.
You sat your phone down. No way were you going to let some simple words over a screen let you get horny in class. You didn’t dare to glance in his direction as you suddenly decided to start paying attention and taking detailed notes on Neurology.
Nanami: You’re blushing again.
Damn him and his observant personality. Damn him and his filthy words that make you squeeze your thighs together to soothe the ache.
Yn: I’m well aware.
Nanami: It’s cute. Makes me want to say more things just to get a reaction out of you.
Yn: Please don’t
Nanami: Why? Scared you might like it?
Nanami: Scared you might like the thought of being beneath me, begging for more?
Jesus. There was no misinterpreting that. You tugged your bottom lip between your teeth as you stared down at your phone, rereading his message over and over. It painted a picture in your brain.
Yn: As if you could make me do that.
Nanami: I can, and I will. Come over tonight.
Yn: To the frat house?
Nanami: No, to my room. I’ll tell Haibara to not come back until late.
Yn: That seems rather rude.
Nanami: It’s far better than the treatment you’ll be receiving later.
Your head feels like it’s spinning as the professor dismisses class. The rest of the day drags by painfully slow as you feel every little heartbeat and flutter in your chest. Nanami talked big game for someone who seemed too shy to really speak to you. It made you feel intrigued. How could he be so confident in his ability to make you beg?
You took your time once you were back at your dorm: going through your everything-shower routine. You wanted to make sure that every inch of you was soft and smooth just in case! It’s not like he’s actually going to make you do anything.
Knocking on his door, you feel your stomach churn with anxiety. You two seemed to be doing better at keeping up a conversation, but you were still deathly afraid of that awkward silence sinking in.
The click of the lock gains your attention, and Nanami opens the door for you. “Come in.” He says flatly, moving out of the way of the door so you can squeeze past him. He’s wearing his usual button-up shirt with black slacks on. How does this man even relax?
Of course his room is completely clean. His bed was even made military style for crying out loud. What the fuck does this man know about making women beg?
“Your room is nice.” You compliment, trying not to sound too awkward.
“It’s a room.” He shrugs nonchalantly before his eyes travel your body.
“How did you tell Haibara not to come home?” You ask, and he gives you a slightly puzzled look.
“I told him the truth.” He says as he loosens his tie from around his neck.
You swallow harshly as you watch his slender fingers pull at the fabric. His jaw is perfectly sculpted along with his neck, and his adams apple bobs as he steps towards you.
“Which is?” You reluctantly ask.
“I told him not to come home unless he planned on watching me fuck a pretty girl to tears.”
Your breath hitches in your throat, and you stare up at him with almost a frightened gaze. His movement feels much more predatory now as if he’s been watching you for a while, sizing you up. He had observed and stood by, waiting for the prime opportunity to pounce.
“What is it? Cat got your tongue?” Nanami asks as he steps forward again. The back of your knees hits his bed, and his smile shifts to a lopsided grin.
“No. I just…” You had no idea what to even say to that! You weren’t use to a man so confidently bolstering about his skills without sounding like a total idiot. Nanami was a rarity. He could talk the talk and walk the walk.
“No. I just..” He mocks you. “You’re awfully nervous for someone I haven’t even touched yet.” His fingers gently caress over your collarbone, before he carefully nudged you back. You tipped over and found yourself sitting on his bed, looking up at him with big round eyes.
“Christ. Have you ever even done this before?” He asks as he leans over you. His hand press down on the mattress at both of your sides, effectively trapping you beneath him.
“Yes!” You exclaim with a huffy attitude that makes him chuckle. “Have you?” You ask, trying to even the score.
“No.” He responds before closing the distance between you two. His lips press against yours and move delicately. Your eyes widen before you realize what was going on, and you slowly melt into the kiss.
Lips smack together as he takes the lead on the kiss. His hands gently cup and caress their way down your body before resting upon your hips. His knee finds it’s way between your thighs, and he applies pressure to your core.
Stifling a small whine, you entangle your fingers through his blonde hair. It’s softer than you imagined it to be. His kisses are growing more and more demanding as he’s pushing you back onto the bed more and more.
He gently bites at your lip, and he applies more pressure with his knee. As soon as you let another another small whimper, he slips his tongue into your mouth.
He’s taking complete and utter advantage over your body while you’re still trying to wrap your head around the fact he said “no”. He’s claiming to have never done this before.
His thumbs dig into your hipbones before he makes you grind against his knee.
“That’s right. Use me.” He purrs lowly, encouraging for you to keep rolling your hips. Once you found a steady rhythm, rubbing yourself against his knee like a desperate slut, he releases your hips and grabs your wrists, pinning you down to the bed.
“Ken..” You gasp out lowly, and he immediately eats up your words, forcing his lips right back upon yours.
The grinding was slowly making you feel all dizzy in the head as you slowly start to mess up your rhythm. He immediately notices your messy state. His hands leave your wrists to grab back ahold of your thighs to make sure you don’t stop. If his slacks weren’t black, he was sure there would be a small damp spot on his leg from your delicious juices.
“Hah~” You gasp as you lean your head back.
“Does that feel good?” He questions lowly before carefully nipping at your neck.
“Yes… Yes, Kento.. more..”
“Oh, what was that, darling? I didn’t hear you.” He taunts as he bites his way down your neck.
“M-more!” You whimper out as you grow impatient.
“So greedy…” He murmurs before his sucks a small hickey on your neck all while he’s still making you grind your pitiful pussy against his thigh. “Beg.”
You feel that defiant nature wanting to kick in. You were needy for him, but you weren’t to the point of begging yet.
“Did you hear me? I said beg.” He demands as he forces you down on his leg harder. Your legs tremble around him as he’s making you rock hack and forth.
“Please-“ You finally choke out against your defiant nature. “I-I.. want more, please… I need you to.. to ruin me.”
“Ruin you, hm?” He asks as his hand carefully trails upwards to your neck. He applies just a bit of pressure. “A pretty girl like you asking for me to ruin her… How could I say no?”
He removes his leg from between your leg, and he quickly replaces it with his hand. His fingers rub firm circles around your clit through the cloth of your leggings. You immediately shudder from the new stimulation. You hold his gaze as he lightly chokes you.
“I think I want to see you come on my fingers first.” He says as he’s quick to shove your leggings and panties down. You gasp quietly as you look down at him. He shuffles himself down between your legs, and he has a determined look on his face. He was set on making you come with his hand.
You push your thighs together with a small whine as he gives your glistening cunt an amorous gaze. Nanami places his hands on both of your knees as he forces your legs back apart. “Now, you know why you came here. What are you running from?”
“I- … You’re looking at me like…” the words ‘like you want to eat me’ die upon your tongue. His aura is just so.. almost intimidating. Not in a scary way, just in a he’s-not-here-to-play way.
“You’re so pretty, but gods, you’re so confusing.” He shakes his head as he carefully drags his tongue up your slippery folds. “Just sit still and let me take care of you, darling.” He mumbles before he laps at your cunt again. He purses his lips and gently sucks on your clit. It almost feels like he’s making out with your pussy.
“Oh.. f-fuck..” You gasp as you lean your head back into his mattress. Your hands fist at the blanket beneath you, ruining his perfectly made bed.
Nanami continues to lick and suck. The sounds in the room were nothing short of erotic. The wet sounds of his lips and tongue smack and almost slurp at you. His hands hold your thighs up, practically wearing them as earmuffs as he eats you like a starved man.
His fingertip gently traced over your opening before he carefully slipped a finger in. He continued to lap at your cunt as his finger pumped in and out and prodded around.
“Oh my-! .. N-Nanami.. ah~” You pant out. In his eyes, your entire body was flushed. You were so subtly grinding yourself against his tongue. In his eyes, you were a goddess in touch with her sexuality and femininity. You just needed a small nudge to get there.
He adds a second finger, and he so carefully curls them upwards to gently press right on the spot that made you see stars.
Your hands abandoned the bed, and you grabbed onto his hair. His hazel eyes flutter up at you, and his glasses were pushed up onto his head.
Your orgasm was building quicker than it ever had before. “Nanami-! fuck, I’m gonna..” You try to warn, but he’s already a step ahead of you. His fingers start pumping a big more aggressively, and he’s pointed with his tongue, focusing all his attention on your clit. His tongue swirls in tight circles around the small bundle of nerves.
Your orgasm washes over you as you clench around his fingers, spasming on his face. He continues to thrust his fingers, letting you ride out your orgasm on his face and hand. Pressing a few more small kisses to your overly sensitive cunt, he slowly pulls away. “Good girl.” He praises lowly.
Your heart is pounding in your chest as you recover from the best orgasm you’ve ever received. Your eyes flutter open weakly to see Nanami ditch his glasses. He uses the back of his hand to wipe his mouth and chin dry.
He then places the fingers he so deliciously used to fuck you into his mouth, and he sucks them clean with a satisfied groan.
“You taste so sweet.” He mumbles as he slowly unbuttons his shirt. It falls to the floor as he starts to unbuckle his belt. You can already feel your arousal building up again as you see the absolute tent in his slacks. Of course the nerd was absolutely hung.
Without another word, his pants and boxers are on the ground. His dick stood hard at attention. It was too heavy to press all the way up towards his stomach. Speaking of stomach, he was absolutely fucking built. He had well-defined solid abs and a broad chest.
You watch carefully as he fists his length a few times. You admire the way the veins bulge from his hands and arms. He wastes no more time: climbing up on top of you. He guides your legs up onto his shoulders, and he leans forward, putting you in a mating press.
His hand suddenly covers your mouth. “Spit.” He orders bluntly.
“W-what-?”
“I didn’t stutter. Spit. Unless you want me to go in dry.”
The thought of that sounded like a nightmare, so you gathered as much saliva into your mouth as you could, and you spat into his hand.
He doesn’t look phased in the slightest as he lubes himself up with your spit. He lets out a soft breath as the wet sounds of him gliding his hand up and down his cock fill the room. He then wipes his hand off on the bed, and he covers your mouth tightly with his hand. “Try not to be too loud, darling. I don’t want anyone to come and bother us.”
He was so fucking confident that he was going to make you noisy. It almost pissed you off, but Nanami was a man of his word.
He aligned himself up with your entrance, and with one deep motion, he buried himself all the way to the hilt. You let out a silent scream into his hand, and your back arches up off the bed. His eyes darken as he lets out a guttural growl.
Your cunt was just too precious to him, squeezing him so perfectly. You were absolutely sopping wet and so goddamn warm. He actually had to bite his tongue to not come prematurely. Once he tasted the hint of metal in his mouth, the urge to finish subsided.
“Shhh, shh. Be a good girl. The pain will subside soon.” He assures you quietly as his hips gently rock back and forth shallowly.
“Mmmnnf~ K-kento!” You moan into his hand. He hates having to muffle your pretty noises, but he really can’t risk getting a noise complaint right now.
“That’s right, darling.. Take it..” His hips start to roll with a bit more conviction. His thrusts are slow but powerful. Each time he buried himself deep in you, you went all dizzy in the head.
“Oh fuck, you’re so pretty like this.” He praises as his other hand holds one of your thighs up for you. Your body is almost slack from how harsh his hips are snapping into you. His leaking tip was bruising your cervix with each brutal thrust.
Nanami wishes he could take a picture right now. Your eyes are all glossed over. Your face is flushed the prettiest shade of pink, and your lips are all puffy and slightly parted. Your babbling utter nonsense as your greedy pussy takes him in with each thrust.
“F-fuck..! So big.. can feel you right here~” You moan as you point towards your lower stomach.
Nanami looks to where you’re pointing, and as if this man needed anymore courage, he begins to fuck you harder.
Plap! Plap! Plap! Plap!
“Yeah? Y’feel me in your womb, darling?” He groans. Noise complaint can be damned. He lets your mouth go and grabs your hips as he continues to pound your pretty pussy.
Tears involuntarily spring into your eyes from the sheer intensity. When Nanami said he was going to fuck you to tears, you thought it was just a figure of speech. Nah, you were lying in his bed, crying because the dick was so good.
“Look at me.” He demands as he grabs your blushed cheek and forces you to look up at him. “This pussy’s mine from now on, understand me?”
“Y-yes!” You cry out to him. Your stomach starts to coil with white hot pleasure as your orgasm builds up again.
“Tell me you love me when you cum on my cock.” He demands lowly. You’re too fucked stupid to argue.
The bed squeaks and wails in agony as he his thrusts are growing more erratic and sloppy. You could feel him getting closer and closer to his release as he gets more vocal and noisier too.
Your eyes cross as you feel your body gyrate on him. Your second orgasm crashes over you so suddenly you didn’t even have time to warn him. Your soul nearly floats away from you as you feel warm juices flood out from you. “Fuck~.. I-.. I love you, Nanami!” You whimper out. In the heat of the moment, it does feel like love.
Such pure pretty words being uttered during such a lewd time. Nanami is instantly emptying himself into you. His dick throbs as he shoots ribbon after ribbon of cum inside of you. His hands are shaking as they hold onto your hips. “Ngh.. I love you, darling. Take it.. All of it. Don’t waste a drop.” He lowly growls.
The room is quiet as both of you pant softly. After a few moments, you realize you had professed a love to him that you weren’t even sure about. Yes, Nanami was attractive physically and mentally. Sure, he was apparently a god in bed, but love???
What if he wasn’t even being serious when he told you to say that? He probably didn’t even mean it when he said it back. What if you made things weird? Is that why he’s being so silent?
Nanami leans down and presses a small kiss to your forehead. “That was intense. Are you alright, darling?” He asks affectionately.
You nod weakly, not wanting to frustrate him with your insecure thinking style.
“Are you sure? I’m not only talking about physically.” He murmurs softly as he slowly allows for your thighs to slip down to around his hips. His hand carefully strokes your cheek.
“I told you I love you..” You murmur out quietly, avoiding his gaze.
He exhales softly in amusement. “You did do that. It was very sexy. Do you regret saying it?”
“I.. I don’t know.” You confess quietly. “You said it back too…”
“I did. Seeing your body in such a vulnerable state as you were trusting me with your very essence made me feel full with love.”
You look up at him as he just said the most romantic thing you’ve ever heard.
“I don’t think I regret it.”
“I’m glad. I don’t regret it either.” He smiles and presses another small kiss to your temple.
*** *** ***
“Was that really your first time?” You giggle as the hot water coats your body. Nanami’s fingers are attentively massaging shampoo into your scalp.
“It really was.” He laughs quietly. “Why is it so hard to believe.”
“You were too good for a virgin.”
“I’m glad my darling thinks so.” He smiles and carefully leans your head back, so the water can rinse the shampoo from your hair.
“Where did you even learn that stuff from?” You ask curiously, wondering if Nanami just had a secret raging porn addiction.
“I have the horniest friend group. They don’t understand the concept of too much information.”
Ah. That makes sense.
tags: @lemonlimecrystal-blog
#jjk#jjk fanfic#fanfic#jujutsu kaisen#drabble#jjk suggestive#jjk smut#jjk nanami#jujutsu nanami#nanami smut#nanami kento#nanami x reader#smut drabble
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