#too many skeletons to tag them all

[sysig]

I was inspired from on high (Patreon)

[metashard]

Guess who I collected yesterday

[indooroutdoorboyfriend]

ok little less fucked up now bc i'm projecting my irrational insanity and rage onto misha. like the ghost trap in ghost busters

[animeyanderelover]

Anon: Yandere Hc’s for the Strawhat Pirates (Luffy, Zoro, Nami, Usopp, Sanji, Chopper, Robin, Franky, Brook)?

Little information that Chopper and Brook are to be read as only platonic as I will not write anything romantic for them. Chopper for hopefully OBVIOUS reasons and Brook because… well, personally I do not see myself attracted to a skeleton.

Tw: Yandere themes, possessive behavior, obsession, delusional behavior, clinginess, manipulation, guilt-tripping, paranoia, overprotective behavior, stalking, threats, violence, abduction

Tags: @ladydoe8

Yandere Hc’s

Monkey D. Luffy

🍖If there is one thing that Luffy has proven to be, it is that he is arguably one of the most stubborn people to exist out there. If he wants someone to join his crew, he isn’t just going to take a simple “no” as a sufficient answer and he will be persistent until either his crewmates have stopped him from recruiting every moving being on earth or until he has convinced the person he has wanted to join. That which I just described is the textbook experience that you have with Luffy. His fascination manifests before his obsession does but even then he is already someone you are unable to shake off and even asking some of his friends, people like Zoro and Usopp for example, will just shrug you off and tell you that it is at this rate easier to join the crew than to demotivate Luffy from trying to recruit you. One of two scenarios can now happen. Luffy wins you over with that adventurous and hopeful charisma that he carries around without being even fully aware of it or you continue denying him, meaning that his obsession develops despite you not being part of the Straw Hats at that point and which I will elaborate further on in the abduction part. A little headstart though, Luffy is delusional.

🍖Luffy is very inclined towards physical affection, it just comes naturally to him. That is one thing that immediately gives his feelings away even before he realises them himself. There’s a lot of excessive touching. A breathtaking hug every morning when he sees you, your presence brightening his day up more than the rays of sunshine. The way he clasps your hand in his whenever there is something that he is just itching to show you. And then there are those curious touches, much more tender in comparison to the normal eagerness always displayed such as when his fingers brush over your lips, his eyes much more dazed as he stares at them before he snaps out of whatever just possessed him. Him being delusional is actually interesting as Luffy is emotionally not really dumb. In fact he is actually able to sense most of your emotions at one point but it doesn’t always occur to him that he might be the cause of negative emotions to you. After all Straw Hats are on this journey to fulfill their own dreams as well as supporting each other’s dreams. Finding out that you don’t wish to be part of that dream anymore would hopelessly break his heart.

🍖Jealousy entails a certain amount of insecurity which isn’t often something that Luffy experiences. Perhaps his delusional and carefree attitude enables him to keep that smile even if you are surrounded by other people as he is feeling very secure in a relationship. Far common is that he is a victim of his attention-seeking clinginess. For Luffy it is natural to share every experience with you as this is part of the joy that he is feeling. For you that may not be the case though as you might prefer to have some moments for yourself or to simply talk to others without thinking too much of him. None of that is necessarily bad… for like five minutes. There is a countdown that really starts ticking the moment Luffy notices that you are doing something without him and sometimes the crew places bets on how many minutes he can hold out on before he inevitably walks over. Actual jealousy usually happens once Luffy actually senses intentions from the other part in which case he is very swift to join the interaction and declare very openly that he is already your boyfriend. None of his behavior could be labeled as anything intense or threatening though.

🍖If there is one big difference between Pre-Timeskip Luffy and Post-Timeskip Luffy then it is the way that he deals with threats. In itself the captain lets you fight your own battles as a victory of yours is a joy he will experience for you and celebrate with you. However, Luffy has also experienced the trauma of losing Ace, who uttered during his last moments that he regrets not seeing Luffy achieve his dream. That is a scar Luffy will never truly recover from and he is prone to almost PTSD-like symptoms when the triggers happen. If he senses that you’re struggling he would already be fast to try to rush to you but it is when he witnesses you heavily wounded on the ground that he suddenly finds himself transported back to Marineford with all the shouts and the sound of cannons going off, the heavy feeling of Ace’s dead body in his arms. His Conqueror Haki just bursts out of him as he shouts your name to the point where he even knocks out some of his own crew members who can’t stay conscious before he launches himself over to you, a tunnel vision taking over that can only concentrate on you and whoever your opponent is if they’re still standing.

🍖Now, freedom is an integral part of Luffy’s very being. He doesn’t see the need to restrict you even though that partial naïveté fueled by his delusions can bite him back if you truly are unhappy with him. Once you have joined the crew of your own free will though, you aren’t going to be able to leave anymore. Especially once Luffy’s obsession kicks in and he becomes aware of his feelings for you. Instead he would rather chalk up any other excuses instead of facing reality that you do not wish to be part of this journey and his dreams anymore. If you never planned on joining to begin with, things might be a bit more difficult to justify but Luffy can do it nevertheless. After all you have been copped up on an island your entire life so you cannot know the joy and the world filled with wonders out there until you try. If you should have ever mentioned to him about your curiosity of the world out there or about a secret wish to sail out there and explore the world, your words are going to come back for you terribly as Luffy will interpret them as your real wishes that you just have to hide due to the stigmatization against pirates or because you think yourself as bound to your island.

🍖Sharing is caring, a philosophy that Luffy properly embraces with you around. Some of the Strawhats are actually surprised just how much he shares with you as there are things that Luffy usually doesn’t offer to others, even his own crew. Food is obviously part of it as he frequently offers you bites of his portions though he also graciously indulges in your own plates. His treasured Strawhat is another part that he often shares with you, specifically when you’re angry with him, when you’re stuck in your own sadness or when you’re recovering from an injury due to a fight. Smiling is a sign for him that you are feeling happy so he is acting silly the moment he realises that he hasn’t seen you smile quite in a while. Alternatively he just pinches your cheeks in order to have you smile. The moment the Thousand Sunny docks at a new island, Luffy is with both of his feet already on the ground ready to explore whilst his arms stretch out to reach you and drag you with him. His Devil Fruit, even before the truth appears of what it really is and the powers that it holds, already means that whatever distance you may try to create, Luffy is able to close quickly.

Roronoa Zoro

🟢This green-haired swordsman is not only terrible when it comes to directions, he just also happens to be incredibly dense in regards to figuring out his own feelings. Zoro’s focus so far in his life has always been found elsewhere. The first buds of his obsession emerge slow and steadily which is perhaps why it is so difficult even for many other of his crew to realise that Zoro has fallen in love with you. Whether it is how he unconsciously finds himself laying down on deck where you currently are, somehow feeling more at ease when he hears your voice which even helps him dozing off quicker only to wake up eventually when you move elsewhere, the silence alarming him of your absence without him even being aware of it. Then there is this subtle need to show of in front of you despite the fact that so far Zoro has often trained all by himself as he suddenly moves parts of his daily training up on deck where you can see him, his eyes every once in a while drifting over to you to find out if you’re watching him or not. He will never get over the fact that Sanji of all people helped him realising his love for you, the cook unable to deal with Zoro’s obliviousness anymore.

🟢In his own ways Zoro also happens to be somewhat clingy, though that term means something very differently if compared to people like Luffy or Sanji. It is more silent hovering than it is glueing himself actively to your side, the clinginess that entails that he is always a few steps away from you or at the very minimum prefers to have you within his vision. In general Zoro is the silent but intense presence, someone who doesn’t speak up unless he really has to. With his love comes a dedication, you found even call it a duty, that Zoro immediately vows to uphold and that is to protect you. With that view that Zoro upholds, a conflict can arise though simply because during dangerous situations or fights he tends to take the front seat and doesn’t allow you to hold your own during battles. Worst of all is that his bluntness leads him to openly admit that he doesn’t want you to fight on your own whenever you confront him about his behavior. A part of him thinks that you don’t have to risk your life when he can join in and protect you but his choice of words can hurt your feelings. That harsh bluntness of his tends to hurt your feelings a lot if he isn’t careful.

🟢Similar to Luffy, Zoro isn’t really breathing jealousy with every inhale that he takes. He is secure as he values loyalty and expects you to uphold those values too. There is a subtle possessive hint though, obvious in the subtle glares that he throws at your direction whenever there are other people surrounding you. If you are his that means that others have to keep their hands off. It is a simple principle in his mind which is why he is all the more pissed at every idiot that doesn’t follow such an easy concept. Zoro is nothing but harsh and scary as soon as another person thinks that they can get away with flirting even if it has been clarified to them before that you already have a boyfriend. A hand is resting threateningly on one handle of his sword, his eyes sizing up the poor idiot who at that point might already be trembling in their boots. On the other hand he gets competitive whenever you express amazement and admiration for someone else, especially when it comes to their strengths or when the person you are admiring is named Sanji. In that case he gets somewhat childish and in some cases he outright asks for a fight to prove that he’s stronger.

🟢Typical for someone who is on the more protective side most of the time, Zoro is already more alert with the people you surround yourself with. That doesn’t mean that he can’t have fun and indulge in some good booze, just that it isn’t easy to push him into a state where he actually drops his guard fully when he is with you unless both of you are on the Thousand Sunny. Generally speaking though, Zoro never takes things lightly when it comes to your safety. The mere utter of a threat with no actions yet involved can quickly lead to a situation where he has already shed two of his swords. God forbid if someone actually attempts to hurt you or even succeeds to injure you as such a thing will not be spared. No, in fact it ends with blood splattered all across the floor. The one thing that can be given to Zoro is that he is incredibly hard but ultimately always fair. He only takes lives that he deems as irredeemable as he has had his fair encounters with evil and malicious presences throughout his journey so he is actually able to tell desperation and blind anger apart from pure killing intent. Still, a punishment must still be served as a warning to never even attempt to harm you.

🟢An abduction is not something that Zoro could afford. How would he even do that if he is constantly on a ship with an entire crew? Even he isn’t dumb enough to believe that this would work despite what the stupid curled eyebrow may think of him. If you are a member of the Straw Hat Pirates then there is really no need to think too much either as you are going nowhere. Most conflicts on the ship usually involve the Love Cook and if things simple start to seriously get on Zoro’s nerves then there is the easy yet effective method to swing you over his shoulder and simply carry you to the training room where he will simply lock himself in with you and you won’t get out until he lets you. You have to be someone he has known for a long time so that pretty much means that you either have to be part of the Strawhats or that you happen to tag along for a longer part of their journey as I don’t see Zoro developing an obsession otherwise. If you don’t belong to another crew and go through thick and thin with the Strawhats it is likely that Luffy extends an invitation for you to join his crew which brings with it that stubborn behavior and inability to accept your rejection so easily.

🟢Bad news is that he often drags you along with him when the crew docks on to a new island and is off to explore it which means that both of you end up lost together. The good news is that at the very least Zoro somehow always manages to never lose you and even if the both of you do get separated, ironically he still finds his way back to you to then have the audacity to act like you are the one who got lost from him. Normally Zoro really prides himself for being quiet and level-headed but all of that is thrown out of the window the moment Sanji is in the picture who is notorious for flirting with women left and right. Because you are off limits for the cook as you are already taken so whenever you are called an affectionate nickname by the cook all members of the crew already know that a new brawl is incoming. Zoro never really gives his feelings much thoughts after the initial realisation that he wants you either. For him all that he is experiencing and feeling is the way it is supposed to be. After all you are the first person that he has ever loved that way so he has no way of comparing nor noticing that some of his feelings go too far.

Nami

🍊A burglar by nature and one in name on her bounty poster just as much, there is going to be a certain mindset that Nami brings with her. She is a lady who is used to stealing what she wants, to treasure all gold and berries. This is a thought process that transcends the previously simple boundaries of all that glitters and glows and milds itself to fit the obsession she has for you. There is a very good pinch of possessive attributes that Nami brings with her, one that now includes you as you are counted as one of her priced possessions. She very much is a no-nonsense person and she makes that abundantly clear to even her own crewmates that you are her lover. She stakes claim as she is the one who is in love with you, is the one who made the first move on you and is also the one who has pretty much bargained you into a relationship with her. When it comes to such matters, Nami is nothing short of persistent and it is not uncommon for her to often bargain with you when there are things the both of you don't agree on. It's not all fun and laughter though as Nami has preferences for things to go her way, perhaps because she is surrounded by so many idiots all the time.

🍊​Precisely because she is surrounded by many crewmates who are often more muscles than brain that she is on a daily basis forced into being one of the few responsible ones who actually think situations through. That is why she is on an aware spectrum in regards to her own obsession. She doesn't show it when she is around others or even when she is with you but it does take up a lot of space in her mind the moment she is alone. Part of her is disturbed of the way that she feels and thinks of you, marked by her own past and the many things that she has witnessed on her journey. She herself used to be caged, trapped in the greed of a cruel man and it is something she has learnt to not be an experience solely she has made. There are lots of cruel and terrible people and creatures out there who cause suffering to satisfy her own greed and even if she can be very blunt and tough, she is not like those people. A balance is important for her as her love for you is at the end of the day genuine. Whilst she is normally used to be on the receiving end of someone's affection, her attempts to show to you that you still mean the world to her are sincere. You are worth more than her treasured berries.

🍊​In a relationship with Nami it is actually very likely that you are far more on the receiving end of jealousy than she herself is. Who wouldn't swoon over a woman as beautiful as her after all? Even if this wouldn't be a factor Nami would still be not prone to jealousy. She knows that she's attractive after all, her confidence has grown since she has joined the Strawhats. If she is one thing then it would be possessive yet that is different than being jealous. Something that belongs to her should be a sign of others straying away, that is the way that she likes to see it. A little bit hypocritical for she is a thief and doesn't respect such boundaries but you are a person and not an object to be stolen away after all. If there is going to be anyone who hits on you then Nami is very quick to put her foot down and that with a force that even terrifies her own crew. The orange-haired girl is infamously feared even amongst the toughest people on her crew and that for reasons. That wrath is something she doesn't spare anyone from, especially those who dare to flirt with you. Usually she is still simmering with anger even after she successfully scares someone off, leading to subtly possessive touches.

🍊​There are more than enough people already who blindly storm into fights, even enjoy them. Something that Nami still doesn't understand fully to this day but she has always participated in major battles as she too is part of the Stra Hat Pirates. She relies on her brains more than she does on her muscles and she isn't quite as reckless as someone like Luffy though. In a situation of such fights though with another crew she prioritises safety and survival over a complete victory and if both of you are on a similar scale of strength than she usually insists for the both of you to stick together. Nami has been fighting alongside the crew many times and she knows that others would only be slowed down if the two of you would interfere too much in their battles, especially those who prefer handling battles alone. Her willingness to defend you against injustice and mindless cruelty burns brightly though and every careless comment normally ends in a swift hit and an apology from the individual who is already sporting a bump. One thing you have to give her and that is her unwillingness to let someone degrade you or talk you down, all the more if you aren't the type to stand up for yourself.

🍊​Assuming that you are part of the crew and that willingly then there are very little worries she would have. Her obsession is one that takes time after all as love like this demands the ability to be vulnerable which isn't always easy for her. Sure, she has been learning to be more openly when it comes to the matters of her heart but she has spend half of her childhood trying to carry the weight of her entire village all alone on her shoulders. It is this weight of being all alone and carrying so much responsibility that she still occasionally expresses, especially once her feelings start acting up. If you wouldn't be an official part of the Straw Hats and her obsession would hit her, she finds herself in a much bigger conflict. Her possessive attributes wouldn't let her rest in peace ever and she would probably try to manipulate you into considering joining her crew, even trying to force people with little manners to behave a tad bit better as she doesn't want you to be weirded out. Ultimately I don't see her abducting you though even if it would greatly break her heart and end in her being permanently bitter to hide her pain. It is terrible after all, the pain of being trapped and she knows that.

🍊​Are you the type who keeps count of the money you spend or the gifts you receive or gift to others? Because Nami most certainly keeps track of such things and this often comes back to bite you majorly when there is something both of you don't agree on. It is then that she always brings up those topics and it is an active attempt to persuade you into agreeing with her to stop any further arguments. Always remember that Nami is not the type who gives without expecting anything in return. No, it is very much a mindset that one hand washes to other with her and she often even calculates such things so that she always has an upper hand against you for such situations. It is one major thing where her controlling behavior shines through as she always wants to have the last word. Another thing to keep in mind is that Nami is blunt and doesn't sugarcoat anything so if she criticizes something about you then she means it, even if she realises after that she probably could have said it a tad bit nicer. Your entire wardrobe goes through a major rebirth under her as Nami redesigns it after her own sense of fashion and she makes it so that every outfit of yours from that day on matches her own.

Usopp

🌱​Usopp is a nervous mess when he is around you and no matter how much he tries to play it off, everyone knows. He can talk of great tales of his heroic acts as much as he wants, it doesn't change the fact that around you his insecurities hit him full force. It borders on pathetic and pitiful as he probably practices in front of the mirror what he wants to say the next time you are around only to fumble completely when that moment happens. In his own nervous state it probably happens more than once that he blurts something out that has you tilt your head questionably, especially since it almost always involves something about you and that has you wondering how he knows that. Truth is that Usopp observes you a lot and takes note of small habits you subconsciously do and other quirks that you express without being fully aware of it most of the time. God, he knows that it sounds creepy but he can't do anything that he has a habit of peeping and his excellent eyesight really only enables him more. He refuses any claims that he is obsessive though even if it is the truth. He just doesn't want you to think of him as weird or creepy as that would be a personal nightmare.

🌱​As fond as you are of Usopp even despite his somewhat uncanny ability to note and remember pretty much everything you said or did once he starts observing you, there are some glaring flaws. His habit to lie is somewhat infamous and though most of the times it is overall harmless, you have noticed that he starts lying the moment you confront him about pretty much anything. There are few things Usopp hates more than potentially disappointing you and in any attempt to dodge that, he starts lying his way out of it. It happens when he loses something that you entrusted him with or when he failed to do a task that you asked of him. Everything would just be solved if he would simply admit to it as you wouldn't treat it as a big deal yet he always gets so defensive for some reason and you don't even know why. The trickiest part is that he does it even if he doesn't want to do so and it is the fact that he does it so naturally that often disappoints you more than anything. It often leads you to ignore him for a couple of days, essentially threatening him with a heart attack until he comes almost crawling back and apologises, finally admitting his wrongdoings.

🌱​Jealousy is going to be a problem that Usopp finds himself confronted with far more often than he would ever be comfortable to admit. Yes, he may have come far from where he started over two years ago in his small village. Yet it changes little in the overall scheme of things. There are so many pirates out there who excel in abilities he could only hope to achieve, there are such people even in his own crew. Really, it shouldn’t affect him as much as it does as many of those abilities simply come from Devil Fruits or from a body that is not human. Still, whenever you express such astonishment for Luffy’s abilities or for Jinbe’s skills as a Fishman, it is hard to ignore that churning hole within his body. Most troubling is that Usopp never wants to admit his feelings to you so he pretty much just waits there, feeling increasingly more uneasy the longer such interactions last. If his fidgety behavior is anything to go by, it is more difficult not to notice. If someone points it out to him though? He just laughs it off. Laughing it off only to later on talk in self-deprecating ways about himself when the both of you are alone. It really isn’t a good way to deal with it but he does it nevertheless.

🌱​A great warrior of the sea. That’s his wish. A wish that he has made what feels like an eternity ago. No one could deny that he hasn’t grown since his adventure has started but simultaneously no one can also say that he hasn’t grown since grown completely fearless. He’d like to label it as him just being more sensible though, especially in comparison to monsters like Luffy or Zoro. If you get stuck with Usopp during a battle you better have a good amount of stamina as the both of you are going to run a lot. Cut him some slack as Usopp is a sniper and not someone made for brawling so if he is pushed into a situation where the fight turns into hand-to-hand skills he has to gain some distance to shoot. It’s a far too common experience to feel his sweaty hand grabbing yours as he starts dashing away with you in tow. Such memories never remain as fond in his mind. Actually he feels a great deal of shame for them later on even if things still turned out right in the end. Still, he cannot change that he is not anything like Jinbe, Zoro or Sanji. He is not build like them so he has to fight and survive in his own ways. You… You understand that though, don’t you?

🌱​Usopp tends to be desperate and desperation can take very different forms. As a member of the pirate crew there would be little thoughts he would have to make in regard to an abduction. Still, even if both of you were to sit right next to each other that is no guarantee for Usopp to feel reassured. Insecurities can plague him after all even if the both of you were to be as physically close as possible. Especially if you have expressed disappointment in him or he at the very least believes that you think that way. That often leads to him spiraling down a dangerous rabbit hole that he struggles to climb out of. What he needs is reassurance but instead of asking he chooses a coward’s way at times. One strength of his are his many gadgets and in any way to soothe his nerves it happens that he invents something that forces the two of you to stick together. You’ll never forget how one time both of you had to spend nearly an entire day handcuffed together because he acted like he lost the keys. Ultimately Zoro had to slice the handcuffs apart, that is after Usopp nearly fainted when the samurai gave the both of you a terrifying grin in an attempt to assure both of you it would be fine.

🌱​Let’s talk about his gadgets once more because even though Usopp sometimes uses them for bullshit reasons, he has gifted you just as many useful things. Especially if both of you have no outstanding skills in comparison to other members will he craft a lot of things for you to survive on a battle field. Absolutely terrified when you are actually mad at him as he’s initially too terrified to approach you. Instead Usopp has found another way to attempt his first apologies. He just uses his slingshot to fire little gifts and letters your way, making sure to not accidentally hit you unless he wishes to madden you even more. The little trinkets that he fires at you are pretty cute but you learn quickly that he needs to learn to face his fears. That usually means that you let him dangle until he approaches you in tears. The beginning of the relationship is one awkward mess as Usopp cannot get his nerves to calm down. His movements are awkward, his palms usually sweaty when he touches you and the first kiss is one huge mess that he doesn’t want to be reminded of. It gets better over time as he gets more comfortable but one fall back into his insecurities brings him right back to the start.

Vinsmoke Sanji

🍝​As shallow as it may sound, gaining Sanji's affection often requires only one thing which is to be of the opposite gender. Without knowing his tragic past this sounds quite horrible but from first observation this seems to be the case. You are treated with the same fondness that Sanji treats Robin and Nami at the beginning when you join the crew, the same blatant favouritism and the same affectionate nicknames. However, you connect on a deeper level with Sanji than anyone expected and there is a slow shift that Sanji himself doesn't seem to be aware of initially, his behavior around you suddenly different than what other women usually receive from him. It all comes crashing down during one moment where the both of you are alone. It could be that you catch him in a vulnerable moment, it could be the situation but with reversed positions or it could even be a simple smile you give him that suddenly leads him to his epiphany. That is when everything falls into place and his obsession fully manifests in that second, his heart bursting with a love that he has never felt before and one he can't help but wonder he even deserves for a split second.

🍝​The very next day he seems to be a different man for you and everybody notices this. Sanji has a high standard when it comes to how he wants to treat you and that already borders on unhealthy at times as he can really push himself if he doesn't fulfill his own expectations he has set for himself. Two things that instantly stand out are his obsessive behavior and his clinginess. Everything about you is committed to mind and when I say everything I mean everything. It is a thin line between being flattering and disturbing, especially when you figure out that Sanji somehow has accurately figured out your three sizes despite you having never told him this. His clinginess is equally overwhelming at times. For Sanji such closeness is a must as he is in a constant state of euphoria when you are around. It is utterly addictive to the point where he actually experiences something akin to withdrawal symptoms when he goes for a few hours without having seen or held you once. His focus slips through his fingers more often as his mind can only think about you and his mood gets quickly more trigger-happy until he quite literally feels sick with unease and longing.

🍝​Jealousy comes as natural as breathing to Sanji and that is by no means any exaggeration. He is hyperaware when you are around and he is just as hyperaware of your surroundings as danger could come for you at every moment. One glance that lasted longer than two seconds can already be a justification enough for Sanji's jealousy to flare up. If beyond simple glances nothing else happens you are able to pull him back and redirect his focus back to you. Once someone does approach and starts a discussion you can only mentally pray as that is the point of no return. That is the moment where Sanji is quite literally fire and flame as he is prepared to kick every man's ass if they dare to flirt with you. It isn't even funny when he gets like this. No, the unfamiliar intensity that you witness in such moments is unlike anything that you have seen before as this is different than the jealousy that he used to express back in the days over Nami and Robin. One time you ask him why he acts that way. Initially he's silent as he takes a whiff of his cigarette before before he finally answers you, telling you that he doesn't trust men. When you ask him if he doesn't trust himself by that definition, he stays quiet.

🍝​Men cannot be trusted. That does include him as well. Sanji doesn't trust himself with you. He feels like he is going to fail you one way or another. Has this not been what he has always been? A failure? The words of a father can ring loudly even years later and that is what haunts Sanji at night. He is not as simple as some way think he is when they initially look at him. There is lots of trauma and issues that have yet to be solved but he has made it his goal to never let you know that. That is a burden he doesn't wish to bother you with but such unresolved trauma and the insecurities that come along with it resurface full force in situations of great desperation. Sanji is fully prepared to throw his own safety away when it is your life that is endangered and during battles that overprotective paranoia fully shows itself. He tanks all the blows meant for you, he fights your enemies and all of that so recklessly that you are torn apart between ferocious rage and suffocating guilt. There are few things more jarring than seeing Sanji so heavily wounded whilst you have little to no scratches yet somehow he still has the audacity to fuss over your small cuts whilst he is about to bleed out.

🍝​Once a member is always a member. That is one realisation that even Sanji has made after Wole Cake Island and he is eternally grateful for that. Obviously that spells in big bold letters that you won't be able to just be able to go your separate way either which is another very relieving realisation of it all. Yet despite both of you being on the same ship all the time, Sanji still follows you around all of the time. The constant doting behavior can get suffocating at times as even the slightest complaint of yours is immediately something Sanji feels the need to fix. In any attempt to get some privacy at times you sometimes just lock yourself away in your own room only to quickly realise just how seriously affected Sanji gets as a result. He won't outright barge into your room but his unease gets the best of him within the next hour where he is knocking on your door and asks if there is anything he can do for you. Sanji is already at a point where he is fully enveloped by the relationship so any minuscle hint that you may think of breaking it off will immediately have him on his knees in front of you in raw panic and fear. He'll do better! He swears it on his life!

🍝​Everything about you is prioritised and Sanji all too willingly pushes his own physical and mental health behind. The constant fear to fail you and to not be enough is a looming threat that follows him around constantly. Every small mistake he may make is often enough to have him question his own self-worth. You underestimate just how extreme this is until you witness it yourself as even the simple sentence of yours that you would prefer your juice with more fruits can lead to such a self-destructive thought process. Nothing can destroy someone more than their hardcore perfectionistic expectations they have for themselves and Sanji is this kind of person. His own infatuation blinds him, makes him discard his own wellbeing as long as he can assure that you are safe and happy and it shows over time. The amount of money he spends for you and the constant effort and time that he puts in for you affect you too as you feel a deep guilt for not being able to do the same for him. What you don't seem to understand is that one simple kiss would be more than enough for Sanji as he holds your love in the highest regard. One he has to prove himself to be worthy of every day.

Tony Tony Chopper

🩺​Chopper is essentially still a child if we're looking at it and that definitely shows from the way his obsession takes hold. Depending on your age he is either going to see you as a sibling or, if you're about Robin's age or even older, as a mother figure. Shunned by his own kind long before he even devoured his Devil Fruit and essentially only saved by the kindness of Hiriluk and Kureha on Drum Island before he was taken in by the crew. The Straw Hat Pirates are his new family but with you Chopper seems to develop a special bond. As he is the closest to you that implies that he is often following you around, very much like a child does with their older sibling or their parent. Whenever he is scared, upset or angry then you are the person that he always comes running to with teary eyes and wobbly lips as he tries to supress the urge to cry. Sometimes he clings to your legs and doesn't let go which ends with you walking around with him clinging to you. Whenever there is a reason to celebrate then he also comes running to you with stars in his eyes, almost vibrating with joy and excitement that everyone managed to survive and that the crew has managed to successfully defeat another foe.

🩺​He is of a pure heart and his feelings follow that example which leads me to believe that he probably doesn't recognise that he is somewhat unhealthily attached to you. After all for him you are his comfort person and the person that he can always run to when there is anything that bothers him. It's that attachment that leads to some separation anxiety, especially when the both of you get separated on an island and he doesn't know where you are and how you are. If it ever happens that you suggest for both of you to be on separate teams it is not uncommon for Chopper to actually start crying. Not even out of manipulate purposes but simply because he doesn't want you two to be in different groups and for that away from each other. It's a heartbreaking sight so you always cave in and take him with you. Often you have to carry him though as he is still somewhat upset afterwards, essentially starts sulking a tiny bit. As the doctor of the crew there are some overprotective tendencies which lead to him putting band-aids on you the moment you lightly scrape your skin. After battles that means that you walk around covered in colourful band-aids.

🩺​Whilst Chopper is neither very intense nor acting like a bratty child, he is a little attention-seeker at times. It's not in his nature to be jealous as he is a doctor and possesses a lot of compassion within his heart. There is no cure for jealousy though, especially if you treat someone the same way you treat him. Credits to him though, despite being delusional he knows when he should stay quiet. I imagine that during the Punk Hazard Arc with all the children he might have gotten somewhat jealous during the calm moments where you doted on the kids and played with them yet he never got mad at you nor them. It's usually after everything is over and safe that he starts expressing his jealousy. It's quite silly though because he is just too adorable even when he tries to look mad. Normally he just turns his back on you, sits down and crosses his arms over his chest. All of it within your vision though so that you clearly see him and then hopefully approach him. Chopper is quick to forgive though, especially when you bring him cotton candy or compliment him which then leads him to do his silly dance as he bashfully denies your kind words.

🩺​If you want to talk about a doctor who is fully prepared to take lives then Chopper is not the person you are looking for in One Piece. He upholds the oath of saving lives and not taking them and his role within the crew is to support as good as he can as there are others who take the frontlines and fight. That doesn't apply that he sits back and does nothing if someone is threatened or attacked whilst he is watching but it means that he never goes for the death blow. If both of you get in danger and you happen to be someone who relies more on offense then Chopper is always prepared to take care of your injuries when the fight is over. It's not necessarily a good idea to have Chopper around you if you are a strong fighter as he despises to see you get hurt so if you fight a difficult battle and get injured a lot then Chopper starts bawling his eyes out, absolutely terrified for your life. The poor pal even falls asleep on your stomach when the fights are over and you are left to be treated by him, afraid that something might happen to you otherwise if he would leave you alone in your room. Occasionally he overdoes his treatment though which ends in you looking like a mummy.

🩺​I'm starting to sound very repetitive but assuming that you are already a part of the Straw Hat Pirates then it is very unlikely that you're going to leave the crew anytime soon. The closest we could come to an abduction, and I'm using that term with Chopper very lightly, is when you are still recovering from a major battle and Chopper insists for you to stay in bed and to not move too much. The moment he sees you walking around, covered in bandages, he starts shouting in horror and rushes over to you, hopping up to grab your hand and drag you back into bed. It is possible though for Chopper to form a strong attachment to you even if you aren't part of the crew but are someone the Straw Hats spend a lot of time with on an island. That is when the situation would get a bit complicated though because then he wouldn't want to leave the island without you. That's when he starts being almost a little Luffy as he follows behind you and tries to convince you to join them, telling you about all the adventures they have had and people they have met. Oh, he's going to be on the floor in tears if you refuse and I have a feeling that his crew may get slightly protective of him and step in for him.

🩺​Fun fact, the reason why Chopper starts collecting cute band-aids and coloured bandages is because the sight of you after a huge battle covered in nothing but white is far too jarring for him. So in any silly attempts to make everything appear a little less serious he starts using brighter colours to hopefully cheer you up a bit. Not everyone on the Straw Hat crew is too thrilled with those changes though, especially Zoro. The swordsman straight-up refuses to be treated only to be threatened by Robin, Nami and you to get over his ego and let himself be treated by Chopper. When Chopper is in his little form he often wants to be lifted up and he likes it especially when you put him on your shoulders and walk around with him like this. Considering that he has a major sweet tooth, you are forced to let Sanji cook some vegetables for him at times. God, the look of betrayal on his face never stops being amusing as you sit down with him and force him to eat his vegetables. There are traditions that develop over time and that Chopper highly values such as always getting a goodnight kiss on the head from you when everyone goes to sleep.

Nico Robin

🌸​She is the most mature person within the entire crew and that definitely is reflected within her obsession. Very differently from how most other Straw Hats would approach their obsession, Robin actually sits back and observes. That’s it and that’s all she does for a very long time. Her blue eyes follow you around when you are on deck and even when the both of you converse you can never quite shake off the feeling that she is looking at you very much like she would look at the ancient writings left behind on faraway islands. But that is indeed what she is doing and not just a mere fragment of your imagination. Robin is actively trying to decipher you and she manages to do so quite efficiently. Mature she is indeed but she is still somewhat creepy with her dark humor and somewhat morbid imagination at times and that is something that people tend to forget about her. She is an archaeologist and she studies you very intently. Her Devil Fruit is a cheat code in all of this as she can essentially watch you and listen to you all of the time. Robin would lie if she were to ever claim that she in fact hasn’t sprouted some ears or an eye within your room a few times.

🌸​Subtle manipulation is a way to go for her and quite honestly, it probably works. After all she has gone through a lot and is one of the most knowledgeable people within the entire crew so you wouldn’t be wrong in trusting her advices and words. There is never any harm intended in her words but if you belong to the reckless type of people on the crew she would be more inclined to figuratively try to slow you down a tad bit more and have you actually think before you act. A little bit of doubt is never wrong after all. Her arguably strongest trait is her being overprotective and one look into her part reveals very clearly why she feels that way. Robin has lost her entire island and has spent 20 years of her life running and hiding before she joined the Straw Hat Pirates. Every new island brings with it new dangers and she becomes increasingly aware of that and ever so subtly that ends in her tightening her hold around you. She can’t afford to lose more people than she has already lost and that is why she increases her manipulation in the first place, every word chosen carefully and spoken casually so you don’t suspect anything. There is no shame after all in participating at the sidelines at times.

🌸​Her serenity is far more horrifying than one could imagine. Once again I want to remind you though that this woman casually jokes about gruesome deaths so there’s that. Now, in itself Robin regulates her feelings far more effectively than many of the other Straw Hats. She hasn’t gone through all the hardships in her life only to be emotionally unstable as that was something she couldn’t afford. She always had to remain tactical. Yet something that she was also taught during that grim period of her life was that she couldn’t trust anybody and always had to look over her shoulder. Sometimes that distrust shows itself when the both of you are around other people. She is polite but that shouldn’t be mistaken with niceness. This is a common error that people make though which leads to an unpleasant turn of events when they assume that they can flirt with you without any worries. Similar to Nami Robin doesn’t accept it when people ignore that both of you are in a relationship as she is swift to correct such disrespect without raising her voice or losing her smile even when she makes some disturbing jokes or pins someone down using her Devil Fruit.

🌸​Honestly, I am convinced that she has had a kill count before meeting the Straw Hats. Forced up to grow in a ruthless environment forces one often to be ruthless in return. She hasn’t gone through met good people now but in her past she has met just as many horrible people and not everyone deserves forgiveness. She is fair but she also knows when to be hard so she is probably on a more willing side to murder people when it comes to you. And once again her Devil Fruit makes her an absolutely terrifying opponent because she can do some proper body horror with her abilities. There’s always that air of efficiency and calmness around her though even as she snaps someone’s neck. Throughout her life she has witnessed enough needless slaughter and cruelty and she does not indulge in such barbaric behavior. No, she finishes a job quick but thorough and that counts for the act of murder just as it does with the tasks that she does in her daily life. Most terrifying of it all is that she always acts so nonchalantly about it afterwards which is always a grim reminder for you that she has been desensitised to such acts as a result of the life that she has led before joining Luffy.

🌸​The point of no return in case you are also part of the Straw Hats is when you receive your first bounty poster. That is going to be the point where you are somewhat stuck as your face is known to the public by that point and your bounty would definitely draw bounty hunters to go for you if you were to ever leave the crew. Still, if Robin catches you sometimes falling into doubts she is usually swift to remind you that you wouldn’t be able to live a proper normal life anymore, even sharing bits of her own past to remind you that you wouldn’t be able to trust anyone fully. Her falling for someone who isn’t a member of the Straw Hat Pirates is something that I personally see as somewhat more tricky as Robin is the type of person who requires a lot of personal bonding with someone for her to start feeling something more for them. 20 years of being betrayed and hunted down still have left their traces after all she whilst she has learnt to rely on others by now, falling in love demands a special kind of trust that she hasn’t given to anyone before. In fact this is an unfamiliar territory for her. Why do you think she always tries to analyse you all the time? Because she needs to understand.

🌸​Once you are in her heart though, Robin won’t let go of you. I guess in that regard she is kind of possessive though age usually hides it well behind her composed expression and calm voice. She makes you feel stupid at times with all of the things that she knows, especially when you say something wrong and she immediately corrects you about it. If the both of you are teamed up on an island and explore together you are often treated like a child that is about to get lost if not for her. She constantly uses her Devil Fruit powers to guide you back before you get lost or even traps you if you’re about to be reckless and so your own thing, reminding you that you are supposed to stay with her and the rest of the group. There’s something quite obsessive about her fascination with every little quirk that you do. In fact she actually starts a small diary where she writes down everyday some interesting facts or things that she noticed whilst observing you. Her gaze is generally something that you often find on yourself when you turn around. As graceful as she is, she has a creepy side to her and you can’t help but think that some of the comments that she says to you are there to let you know that.

Franky

🔨​There’s nothing quite as super as you in Franky’s eyes. Love blinds after all and nothing shines as bright as you do in his eyes. Romance aside, you cannot count on Franky being all too aware of his own obsession with you. No, it’s all glory and glamour in his eyes as he fails to ever realise the extent of his unhealthy feelings for you. Anyone within a radius of five miles will probably be able to hear him clamoring his confessions of love as Franky goes about courting you like he goes about most things in his life. Over the top and extra. The whole world should know about his super hot babe and you can bet that gorgeous ass of yours that he will let them all know. Doesn’t sound too harmless initially until you slowly notice that Franky just doesn’t know when to quit or how to stop. Blame that delusional brain of his for that as any rejection you give him goes into one ear and flies right out of the other. Such is the bliss of a man too blind to see the otherwise uncool truth that would only break his heart and dream. And so he continues with it all, fueled by the belief that one day you will understand. Quitting is only for losers after all.

🔨​There’s a good slice of a more obsessive side behind all that shiny metal and quirky inventions that he has added to his own body during the two years worth of training. It’s his skills of building and creating such amazing inventions that do give him an advantage as he can come up with all sorts of machines and devices that can be of great assistance for his pursuit. One of the earliest things that you receive is a tracker which Franky presents as a gift for you. Whilst he doesn’t use it too often it does ease his mind to know that he can always know of your location if an emergency should happen. Similar to Usopp, Franky often finds himself building you stuff when he hears that there is a problem that you have and that he can solve. Instead of inventing something small and practical in typical Franky style he ends up overdoing it and builds so many extra stuff and functions in that it becomes something else entirely then what your initial issue was. You greatly scratch at his pride though when you tell him that you don’t need all the other functions which often ends in quite a bit of a discussion where you eventually have to give in as Franky beats you on the stubborn level.

🔨​He’s pretty cool with a lot of people as Franky has little to no shame nor shyness. Walking around all of your life in nothing but underwear will do that to you I assume. Whether this is a good thing or a bad thing though, it has given Franky the ability to be very open and honest when he is feeling jealous. To a certain degree he doesn’t mind when others flirt with you. After all you are one smoking hot woman so obviously everyone would want a piece of you and it makes him proud to know that he’s your boyfriend whenever he hears the compliments. The moment someone gets too close though or starts suggesting stuff is the moment Franky steps in. All loud and super as always as he wraps one huge arm over your chest and pulls you closer to his side and declares proudly that he’s glad to hear that people agree with him that you, his girlfriend, are hotter than a desert. It’s the full package then as he calls you by all the nicknames, starts complementing you himself and starts smooching you all across the face. All that whilst continuing to be so energetic yet still confrontational until the person is visibly uncomfortable and doesn’t know how to act.

🔨​Even if you have a Devil Fruit or use a special weapon or Haki, Franky still conjures up another device that you can use in a fight. Considering his style I’d like to imagine that he gives you something like miniature missiles which you can fire at opponents when things get tricky. Still, Franky lets you handle yourself outside and during any major conflicts and fights that the Straw Hat Pirates go through as he has trust in you. As long as you carry the object with the hidden tracker he also always can find out where you currently are if things start taking a turn for the worse. In case that the situation should get dangerous he might just come over and pick you up with his robot, offering as much protection as he possibly can. As enemies get progressively stronger I can imagine him building stronger devices to defend himself and to protect you which might lead to him blowing someone up as a result of overusing the new invention. Otherwise I don’t see Franky really being overly violent and bloody. Technically others would be scared of him as he is a huge cyborg so an average human should by all accounts be intimidated by him even if he isn’t even trying to be scary.

🔨​Probably more likely to fall in love with you even if you aren’t a permanent part of the crew when he initially gets to know you. Franky wears his heart much more openly on his sleeves in comparison to some of the other Straw Hats and that enables him to form an obsession with someone who the crew might not have known for too long. Prepare yourself for his loud voice following you around from that day on all to talk you into joining the Straw Hats when the time gets closer for them to part for the next leg of their journey. Do not even expect him to ever stop being persistent as he is pushed by his delusional tendencies once more that if he just pushes through and stays determined, he will eventually reach his goal. Even then he would somehow end up using a tracker to always know if your current whereabouts, especially if you stay on the island he first met you at. Obviously being already part of the Straw Hats makes things a heck lot easier as then he always has you within arms reach and can simply find you when he wants to see you. With all of his different inventions that he builds specifically for you he also always has in mind to keep you happy on the Thousand Sunny.

🔨​It’s obvious that you are favored amongst the crew with all the things that Franky keeps on adding to your private room whenever you complain about something. He sees it as a little challenge of some sort, to see how efficiently and how fast he can build something to solve the issue that you currently have. On paper Franky is not even that intense nor restricting as some others but I feel like it is very easy for you to get overwhelmed by him, especially if you’re on the loud and introverted side. Franky is the complete opposite after all, exuberant and all in your face. It’s possible that you find yourself often giving in to his requests and wishes simple because you don’t have the energy to argue back at him. Franky is partially at fault too for not considering that this might be a possibility as that is a problem most delusional Yandere have. It probably needs someone like Robin or Sanji to make the suggestion to him for him to actually take a reflecting step back and ask you. Whenever there is a special event, be that your birthday or your anniversary, Franky goes all out. Fireworks, cannons firing confetti and so much other stuff-one big spectacle essentially.

Brook

🎻​Brook is a strange man. He is not that far away from pushing a 100 years yet he is very much in tune with the chaotic and ridiculous antics that the Straw Hats have going on. Having spent decades all alone though, Brook is quite determined to bring you as much joy and laughter as possible. In that aspect he is quite overprotective for as soon as he spots with his eyes that you are sad, he is already there with his music instrument to cheer you up…. Although he has no eyeballs. Those antics tend to be somewhat annoying at times, especially when you actually need time to digest work your feelings out instead of brushing them off in favor of entertainment. Initially you expect Brook to not understand your needs yet surprisingly he apologises and excuses himself. He gives you space yet he still looks after you from a distance. Such small moments help you to remember that he is in fact the oldest person on this crew even though he is not always acting like this. Well, perhaps he just doesn’t want to behave like an old man now that he can afford to be silly again. He has spent about 50 years being closer to being dead than alive after all… Technically he is.

🎻​You are going to be younger than him as long as you are a human and the younger you are, the more protective he is going to be. Brook never really had any children or grandchildren but he wonders if this is what it would feel like if he would have had any. Yes, he is aware that he can come across as very unserious at times but there are still little bits of wisdom that he can give you, experiences from his own life that he tells you so that you may know better. Such fleeting moments where he dwells in memories are important if you can learn something out of it but he never gets stuck in the past for too long for he wants to live his new life to its fullest and doesn’t want you to feel the pain of old scars that are still in his heart… Although he doesn’t have a heart. Brook is usually not to restricting as the philosophy of living one’s life to its fullest includes your own. There are his moments though, especially when there is something that has spooked him or if it’s obvious that the current situation the crew is in starts to get risky. In such moments he usually makes sure that you stay within his vision, the unease in the air even if he tries to ease the tension with some bone jokes.

🎻​As he takes on the role of a father/grandfather figure, he would most likely feel left out when he realises just how old he is and how much he has missed during his 50 years drifting aimlessly through the inescapable fog. New inventions that did not exist during his times, stars that rose to fame and criminals and pirates that have become greatly feared all whilst he searched for his deceased body. Brook hates feeling left out like this as he understands yet simultaneously doesn’t understand the words that you are saying. So in order to understand so that he may laugh with you and react with you, he is quick to step in as he tilts his body in an unnatural way and cuts into the conversation you’re currently having. May you let him in on what you’re currently telling? There’s always going to be at least one person screaming in horror when they see a walking and talking skeleton, often ending with Brook screaming back in horror as he nearly has a heart attack… Well, actually that isn’t possible since he doesn’t have one. Still, he gets scared too and later on he feels sad that people get so frightened when seeing him which leads to you having to cheer him up.

🎻​He would probably be a bit of a helicopter parent if you would ever start developing a romantic interest in someone or vice versa. It is silly considering that you may already be an adult during the journey yet he can’t help it. He’s not outright hostile but he asks a lot of questions, especially if the person in question is around and with every one he leans a bit closer in an unnatural angle. Someone of the crew is going to be a victim of a dramatic speech during such hard times for him as he muses where the good times have gone of you being so small and innocent. He usually avoids people who bluntly tell him that it hasn’t even been that long since he met you. Precious memories were made, okay?! On a battlefield Brook keeps an eye out for you but he isn’t outright interfering with your fights. Everyone has been training for 2 years and got stronger, you included. That deserves respect. Respect that Brook intends to give you yet he is always ready to jump in if things get too difficult for you. It’s likely that if your life is in serious danger that the old man gets serious. He has been given a second chance and this time he is going to defend his family.

🎻​Brook is quick to bond with people, his non-existent heart bigger than even those of the living. Forming a bond with him isn’t difficult but for him to form a father/grandfather-daughter/granddaughter relationship with him requires either more time or shared experiences of fighting a difficult battle together. He’d be quick to suggest to Luffy that you would make a good addition to the crew and would be even quicker to ask you if you would be interested in joining. You cannot expect him to let you go after you decline his offer. In fact Brook is actually going to be a stalker for a little while, following you around and trying to change your mind. He nearly caused your heart to stop when you walked home late at night one time only to turn around when you felt a bony hand on your shoulder to stare into the holes where his eyeballs used to be. He has learnt his lesson after that accident and always announces his presence from that day on when he approaches you behind at night. If you have been part of the crew before he even joined then such efforts and worries would obviously not be made unless he would have the sneaking suspicion that you want to leave.

🎻​His age sometimes catches up to him whenever you excitedly tell him about something that was invented after his time and all he can do is nod as he lacks any content. In such moments he really feels it in his bones that a lot of time has passed indeed. Ha, you get it? In his bones? Moving on though, he would probably learn your favorite songs and play them on his violin or guitar for you. Whatever music genre you really prefer as he is a confirmed rockstar and for that knows how to play and sing. That’s probably one of his proudest achievements that he often likes to talk to you about after everyone reunites. If you confess to him that you didn’t witness any of it as you were busy training he would be quite literally on his knees for a few moments due to the shock and disappointment. Brook doesn’t demand for you to spend all your time with him but if he wants to spend time with you then he plans to go through with that, especially after big events like Whole Cake Island or Wano. If you have something else to do that isn’t of urgent business though, Brook isn’t above using the pity card on you to make you feel guilty and cause you to ultimately agree to go with him.

[delta-experiment]

Hey all! It's been a long time!

Delta Experiment first went on indefinite hiatus when Chapter 2 of Deltarune released. Now, Chapters 3 and 4 of Deltarune are out! That's crazy to think about!

I still think about Delta Experiment a lot. (Maybe too much...)

While I was playing through Chapters 3 and 4, it struck me just how many things Delta Experiment correctly predicted (and just how many things I got wrong.) Comparing and contrasting the plans I had made to the finished product has been a very, very interesting experience.

The problem is, I can't really talk about it, because those chapters of Delta Experiment were never released...

So, in honor of Deltarune's newest release (and for the sake of my sanity), I've decided to share the plans of what the future chapters of Delta Experiment were going to be!

I plan on first giving the bare-bones premises of each chapter, and then individually going through one by one and expanding on how certain events and character arcs were going to play out. As I go through, I may also add commentary on how they compare or contrast with the actual release of Deltarune (don't worry, any spoilers would be properly tagged!)

Without any further delay, here's the (very, VERY) simplified outline. Keep in mind, all of these plans were made with only Chapter 1 to go off of!

CHAPTER 3: OUR NEWEST FAMILY MEMBER

In which:

Frisk and "Chris" investigate the skeletons, uncovering the relationships between them (and the fact that Sans, Papyrus and Gaster originally came from another world)

Sans teaches Frisk the ability to sense chroma.

Sans "befriends" your mother.

Asriel and Papyrus bond over their struggles with "Chris" and Gaster, resolving to be patient and grow closer as a family.

Sans receives a phone call from his alternate self.

The Cyan Flower blooms.

CHAPTER 4: BY ANY OTHER NAME

In which:

"Chris," Frisk and Asriel go to church, learning about the human Saints, the history of the Human-Monster war, the legend of the Angel and the Dark Knight.

"Chris" sleepwalks and trashes the house, blaming it on Asriel and getting them grounded.

"Chris", distraught, sneaks out to meet Asgore and thank him properly for helping them while they were living in the alley.

Asgore, sensing they need advice, tells them the story of him and Toriel's relationship, and how it was a lack of honesty that ultimately destroyed it.

"Chris" decides that they're going to try to be more honest from now on, beginning with their identity. Their true name is Chara.

Chara returns to Toriel, explains the situation, and takes the blame for ruining the house.

Asgore still holds a secret.

The Blue Flower blooms.

CHAPTER 5: BALL GAME

In which:

Human exchange students from the city come to Hometown for an annual ball game. The human kids are mean to the monsters, and the monsters form their own team with Jockington as the leader.

Chara's hatred of humans leads to them assaulting one of the other players, getting taken off of the team.

Noelle bravely scores her first-ever goal. Carol doesn't get to see it.

The monsters lose the game, but they proved themselves to be equals through their perseverance.

The Purple Flower blooms.

CHAPTER 6: TOWN HOLIDAY

In which:

Carol sets up the town carnival.

Chara and Asriel help Noelle to win her bake sale competition by selling more gingerbread than little Muffet's spider cookies.

Noelle, grateful, gives Chara a hug. This surprises them.

Meanwhile, Frisk meets a mysterious monster girl from the city who is in town for the carnival. She wins a deck of cards in a game, but ends up dropping them, so Frisk tries to return them to her.

Frisk follows the girl up the mountain, where they accidentally fall down a hole and end up in the Dark World. They experience the carnival from the perspective of the objects, and become good friends.

Frisk learns the girl's name is "Suzy".

They leave the Dark World, and Suzy leaves, asking them not to forget their friendship. They leave the Jack card with Frisk for assurance.

Suzy has seen too much. She is made to forget.

Chara, Asriel and Frisk reminisce about how they used to be enemies, but are now good friends.

The Green Flower blooms.

Chara lets it slip that their full name is "Chara Knightmer." With that knowledge, Gaster places a phone call...

CHAPTER 7: THE TRIAL

In which:

Chara's biological parents come to bring them home. However, there are some pressing concerns regarding their home life, their life in Hometown, and the jurisdiction of the law.

A trial is held to determine whether Chara will stay in Hometown. Carol will preside.

The Yellow Flower blooms.

CHAPTER 8: AN ENDING

In which:

Your actions have consequences.

CHAPTER 8: ANOTHER ENDING

In which:

The experiment is complete.

[youregonnahavetime]

JFHDHDHSJEHEHZSJDBSHEBE (/pos)

HOLY CRAP HE LOOKS AWESOME IM. LOOK AT HIM!! MY BOY!! THANK YOU!!

RUNS IN A CIRCLE. SCALES THE WALLS. ROLLS OVER THE FLOOR (/pos)

THANK YOU

(didnt want to take away from the super awesome art so stupid choice doodle is banished to under the cut)

looks at you with my autistic eyes (/ref /lh)

yo @youregonnahavetime come get your goober

anyways more of them

(in honour of me thinking his frostbite looks cool and fun to draw lol (obligatory “this is stupid”(it is(how many parentheses can this have(let’s see(or not(mmmmmmicrowave sound(ok Ill stop now)

[nsharks]

bleeding blue | apocalypse au

part twelve —other parts

pairing: Simon "Ghost" Riley x fem!reader words: 3k tags: *hint at sexual assault. please be cautious!* death. blood. cannibalism mention. zombies of course. AFAB reader. single dad ghost. there will be sex but it isn't here yet. slow burn!!! enemies to lovers. summary: After losing your companions, you run into a skull-masked man and his daughter. They are your last hope for survival.

Dense mud packs onto the soles of your boots. You shift the near-empty backpack on your shoulder and slip back a few sweat-laced strands of hair from your face. Never before were you a morning person. In fact, you used to purposely sign up for all the afternoon lectures in uni. But now, time and sunlight are precious. You set out to search for the camp this morning with only a sliver of sunrise as your companion. 

You hope Ghost was right.

He suspected that their camp would be situated in a location with easy access to the military base, river, and nearby village so they could draw resources from all three. So that's the direction you're headed in, squinting at nearby landmarks and interstate signs to help guide you. It's quite the hike: grueling, hilly terrain and moist air that you can't distinguish from your own sweat. You've stepped over some interesting sights along the way. An old forest station with CAMP FEES and LEAVE NO TRACE posters still outside. A small skeleton tucked in a bush with only child-sized rainboots left on it. For a moment, you saw Joseph. Toddling around in the puddles outside your sister’s house. You had to force yourself not to look at it for too long; you wiped your eyes, gritted your teeth, and prayed it had been painless for them.

You come to a narrow creek, crossing over a stone bridge that spits you out among dense evergreens. Finally, a faint column of smoke comes into view just above the forest's canopy. 

That must be it.

It's certainly a sign, so you suck in a shaky breath, ignore the rush of blood in your veins, and do what Ghost suggested: climb a tree to get a better look. 

There was a time not long ago when climbing trees was your only means of survival. This time, it feels so much easier to hoist yourself up and grip the bark as your muscles flex to steady yourself on a high branch. Luckily, there wasn't much to bring in the backpack Ghost gave you. For now, there's nothing in it other than your lighter, a roll of gauze, that romance book, and a small piece of dry wood. 

Squinting your gaze, you make out the silhouette of triangular, orange tents and uneven fencing. Definitely a camp. The fence doesn't appear barbed from here, but it's at least a meter higher than the one that surrounds Ghost's place. You're close enough to see a few blue crates in the center that look like those ones from the military medical site. Is that what they're keeping the supplies in? It seems like the only obvious place based on the layout.

What you really want to know is how many people. Soundlessly, you shift your boots to get a different angle and finally spot movement coming out of one of the tents— a sizeable male wearing a leather jacket.

One.

Is that it?

Your eyes stay locked on the stranger for a minute, tracking his movement as he cooks something over the fire. He gives out a long whistle, the high-pitched sound audible even from where you stand nestled in the treetop. Panic seizes your breath: did he somehow see you and is alerting someone else? But no— you're much too far, and his eyes never shifted in your direction. 

Instead, there's more movement, the faint shuffling of paws on the ground, and then a large dog appears at the man's side. He tosses something in front of it, what must be a slab of meat, because the dog is quick to start chowing down with the enthusiasm of a mindless Grey.

"Fuck me," you whisper to yourself, fingertips splintering against the bark. "Couldn't prepare me for that, huh, Ghost?"

The plan he instructed you with is fairly simple and straightforward— you'll just have to stick to it and be mindful of the additional obstacle. You've survived much worse even just a few days ago, so with that in mind, you slip down the column of the tree and purposefully backtrack your steps, gaining a bit more distance between you and the camp. 

You need a ruse, something to draw the man out for enough time for you to grab the ammo. Ghost told you to bring the book to help get a fire started since the twigs and leaves here are damp after the storm, so you find a good spot and start ripping out the pages, crumpling them up. You arrange the piece of wood and paper in such a way that you have a minute or two before the smoke really gets going. You pull out your lighter from the pocket of your jeans, start it, and then head back towards the camp, this time going around so you can approach it from the side. 

You keep your footsteps as light as possible while moving quickly. Once the man notices the smoke and leaves to scout it out, your timer starts. There's another whistle followed by a gravelly bark from the dog. You sneak close to the side of the fence, pausing behind a tree, just when you catch a glance of the stranger shucking a rifle over his shoulder and exiting out the gate. He shuts it behind him with a series of padlocks.

It won't take him long to find the source of the smoke and realize it's nothing, so you muster all your strength and begin climbing the fence, rusty links digging into your palms. You try to do it without making much noise, but the moment you jump down with a thud, the dog's head snaps in your direction. It begins to growl, flashing thick canines under its bloodied muzzle. You break out into a sprint toward the blue crates, but it crosses the span of the camp in mere seconds, clamping down on your forearm before you can even begin to look for the ammo.

The pain is white hot. You silently cry out as the dog shakes its head, tearing through the fabric of your coat and the tissue of your muscle. 

"Fuck."

You tug at your arm, but it doesn't let go. Remembering the piece of squirrel meat you brought as a snack, you dig it from your pocket and wag it in front of the dog's face.

"Come on, let go— please."

It's enough to catch his attention, the bite on your arm loosening once you toss the meat a few meters away and he follows it. You clutch your arm with a ragged breath, ignoring the blood and pain that radiates from it.

The squirrel can only distract him for so long, so you urgently flip open the lid of the first crate. Staring back at you is a mix of what appears to be severed limbs and various animal parts. The pungent smell floods up your nose. You instantly clamp the lid back down, fighting the urge to vomit, and move on to the next one. 

Ammo.

Plenty of it.

Without a second to waste, you sling off the backpack and begin stuffing it with the cardboard packs of cartridges, hoping it's the kind Ghost needs. When you tug the zipper closed, a decision pops into your brain: to keep looking through the other crates for medicine, or to get the fuck out of there. You take a millisecond too long to think about it because suddenly, you notice the dog from the corner of your eye, done with the meat and moving towards you with another throaty growl. 

You tug the heavy backpack on and make a beeline for the closest side of the fence. In the panic, you fail to notice the creak of the gate opening until you are stumbling into a hard chest. A strong hand wraps around your bicep.

Fuck.

He's back.

This is it, then.

"Rocky— sit."

The growling behind you ceases. A whole new fear washes over you as you blink up at a rugged face. The stranger uses his other hand to take hold of your jaw, hard enough that your teeth are forced to grind together. In a heart-pounding silence, he inspects you, bluntly looking you up and down. Then, he takes out a knife and presses it to your neck. Your throat bobs against the icy metal. 

"Fucking bitch," he mutters. "Start a fire to try and steal from me?"

"N-no!" Your brain reels for a lie. "No— I don't know what you're talking about. I-I came here looking for help."

"Try a better lie, sweetheart." 

"I mean it," you stammer, holding onto the fact that he hasn't slit your throat yet. Raw desperation speaks for you. "My… my friends are gone. Someone attacked us a few days ago and killed them. I've been alone ever since and then I found your camp, hoping someone would be here to help me."

This seems to grab his attention. Dark eyes narrow. It's now you realize he's quite young, maybe in his thirties.

"Someone attacked you, huh? Who?"

"Um, some guy. I don't know. I didn't get a good look at him because he was… he was wearing a mask."

"So some guy killed all your friends by himself?" When you slowly nod, cringing at your terrible story, his jaw flexes. "I've lost my friends, too. They went out on a hunting trip three days ago and haven't come back."

"Oh. I'm sorry," you lie, swallowing. "So you… so you believe me?"

"I believe your friends are dead. I don't believe you didn't start that fire to distract me."

His words make your heart race. Again, his eyes trail down, and the knife follows, lowering to the floral fabric of your blouse and popping open one of the buttons. 

"Take it off," he suddenly orders. 

"W-what?"

"The shirt. Take it off. Let me decide if I should kill you or keep you."

You put on a brave face and do as he says, not given much room to protest despite the sick feeling that twists your gut. You drop the backpack, half-inclined to swing it at him, but then what? There is no way you can take him in a fight, especially since he's armed with a knife and gun, and there is no Grey this time to help you out. 

The coat falls to the ground at your feet before you shakily undo the buttons of your blouse, wincing from the movement of your bitten arm. Crisp air greets your bare skin. Your nipples tighten uncomfortably and his gaze darts right to them, intensifying the churn in your stomach. 

He gives a low whistle. "Lucky me."

Your nails jab crescents into the palms of your hands. "Am I… am I worth keeping, then?"

He bears a sick, toothy smile. "Pretty for a thief," he confirms. "Haven't seen someone so pretty in a few years now." His eyes flash to your arm and he reaches to grab it, making you choke. "Hell, Rocky. You gave her an ugly bite, though. Might get in the way of what I have in mind for you."

Half-naked, you are dragged by the arm to one of the blue crates. He slips the knife into his pocket in order to search through it. You notice pills, liquids, and a single glass bottle of what appears to be clear alcohol, which he pulls out along with a cloth.

"Tell me your name," he says, forcing you to sit down on a folding chair. "Before I enjoy you.”

You tell him quietly.

With an eery gentleness, he sits across from you and dabs the bite with some alcohol. The sting is immeasurable, but you roll your eyes to the sky and silence yourself. The feel of his cold, calloused fingers makes you imagine how they would feel touching other parts of your body. You need to think of something quick before he gets the chance to. He still has the gun on him, and the only knife you brought is in the jacket on the ground. Your eyes flicker to the bottle, which he set down by the leg of his chair.

"What's your name?" you ask, looking back at him.

"Leo."

"So, um, Leo— how did you end up here?"

"I was a new recruit in the military when shit started five years ago," he explains idly, fixated on your arm. "Stationed at the base nearby."

"I saw medical tents there," you mutter, clearing your throat. "Did you help with that?"

He chuckles. "For all of a day until some buddies and I decided to take what we could and leave. There was no point in trying to help people. We figured that out pretty quick."

"Oh. Were those the buddies who haven't come back?" 

He nods. "I'm sure they're dead by now. But, one good thing is," he reaches for the gauze, sniggering lowly, "—that means I don't have to share you."

As he begins to unwrap the gauze, you decide he’s distracted enough. It happens in one, urgent motion. You clasp the alcohol bottle by the neck, arch it above his head, and thrust it down. The glass shatters, drenching him with alcohol and blood as a piece slices open his forehead. He immediately drops the gauze and hisses in pain.

"Bitch," he snarls. "I'm going to fucking kill you!"

He leaps to his feet and pulls the knife out again. As he does, you dig the lighter out of your pocket and ignite a flame, bringing it to his soaked shoulder. Instantly, fire flashes up his neck and face in hues of orange and blue, even catching your wet fingertips. It renders him blind as he howls and tries to swing at you, but you immediately run away, rubbing your burned hand against your jeans.

You grab your discarded clothes and backpack before flinging open the crate with medicine in it. You begin stuffing as many bottles into the side pockets of the backpack as you can, breathing frantically.

"I'm going to kill you," he seethes again, and the firing of a bullet somewhere behind you means he must have grabbed his rifle.

But he still can't see, his eyes blistered by the flames that continue to lick his face. Each shot bites the ground as you heave the backpack on your shoulders and take off toward the fence.

The dog barks, louder and louder as he runs after you. You don't look back. You wad your clothes up in a ball and toss them over the fence to free up your hands. Then, you quickly climb up, the muscles in your face tightly clenched as the full backpack weighs you down. 

You're too slow. 

Teeth grab hold of your boot.

You're pulled back down, hands spreading out to break the fall. 

In the mud, you wrestle beneath a snarling jaw, dirtying up your hair and exposed skin. This time, you don't hesitate to hurt the animal. You grab your lighter again and thrust the flame into the dog's eye, making it leap back with a pained squeal. 

Freed, you scramble back up the fence.

You leap down. Grab your clothes

You can still hear him shouting as you run away, weaving through the thicket of trees. Only when the sound fades do you stop to catch your breath, sinking down against a tree and putting your clothes back on.

"Here."

A moan of relief escapes your lips the moment you shrug off the backpack and drop it at Ghost's feet. He crouches down, swearing under his breath when he unzips it and the ammo practically spills out. He grabs a few boxes, opening and inspecting them under the violet light of sunset. The walk back took you hours longer. You were almost tempted to sleep in a tree for the night, but the threat of Greys or any more strangers kept you going. 

"Good. This is good, Twix." There's a hint of disbelief in his voice before he clears it away, zipping the backpack up. He stands and offers a lengthy look from your head to your boots. "How many were there?"

"Just one."

"Just one," he repeats, brow lifting. "And you look this roughed up. What happened?"

"There was a dog," you say dully, lifting your arm up to show him the bitemark in your sleeve. Beneath it, you already bandaged the wound, not wanting to draw attention to its scent. “Just a dog and a cannibal rapist guy."

"What?"

You shake your head. "Nothing. I'm going to sleep."

Before you can take a step past him, warm fingers latch onto your wrist. So warm. You inhale a breath, a burn of moisture lining your eyes.

“Please don’t touch me," you request in a harsher whisper than you intend.

You can no longer see the details of him with how bleary your eyes are, but you feel his touch disappear.

"What happened?" he asks again, voice lowering.

"Nothing. I got your ammo and I handled it. When can we leave?"

There is a pause before he responds as if he is debating whether or not to drop the subject. For now, he does.

"Tomorrow, hopefully."

"Good." The back of your hand smooths over your eyes. "Don't— don't forget our deal, Ghost. Promise me."

A firm nod. "I don't back out on my word."

As if to prove it, he shucks off the jacket and hands it over.

[sheepispink]

A LIGHT THAT NEVER GOES OUT

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Masterlist AO3

pairings: Simon Ghost Riley/ Reader (platonic or romantic, up to you)

tags: probably loads of military inaccuracies, anxiety attacks (possibly?), heavy angst, angst and comfort, paranoia, bad mental health, cuddling and literal sleeping together (up to you romantic or platonic)

A/N: I’d appreciate if no one complained abt the accuract/realistic of the story (ofc if its the characterisation of ghost that’s perfectly ok!) i’m open for criticisation for how i write etc etc but this is a sensitive topic and.. based off personal experiences 😅😅 so it’s very realistic to me even if its not to you!

This technically takes place after this fic but it’s not a big deal in which the order you read it

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You’re an introvert, even if you do get excited really quickly, loud around people you’ve known for a while and love meeting new people. Yet still, you call yourself an introvert, even if that technically still makes you an extroverted introvert. You don't like the sound of an extrovert— someone who thrives off of others' attention and loves to be the center of it, who brightens their days with their friends and always wants to make plans with anyone and everyone. You like the attention sometimes; when Price mentions your name in a conversation, praising your skills, your heart thumps a little louder. Being at the limelight of the party isn't always the worst thing either, especially when everyone laughs at your jokes so hard they double over, grinning so wide you can't help it either. You love your friends, your teammates, even the random soldiers you’ve only exchanged small greetings with. The love for others is held tight in your heart’s vessels, bursting each and every time they make you smile or you just see their presence. You feel so warm and alive when you give them a grin in the mornings, even more so when they seek out your presence throughout the day.

Though, that only applies sometimes— never always.

A familiar soldier could ask you out to lunch and yet your chest begins to twist uncomfortably, like someone is wringing your intestines with their hands. Something screams at you when they say those words, like an invisible line had just been crossed that had been clear in everyone's heads. You had only ever spoken to those soldiers in the gym or around base, there was nowhere else even remotely personal you’d think to take them to. One on one conversations were not common either, since it wasnt that often. It’s not that you don't like them, it’s just.. not right. You’d shake your head apologetically as you force an excuse between your teeth. The regret you then express is a lie, along with the love you felt before— only reduced to a being who could never hold any of those things.

The truth is, you have a sick little parasite in you, it claws at that heart muscle, tearing away the flesh and devouring any love you feel for the people you care about and replacing it with an empty feeling which is always followed by an unreasonable hatred. Your mind grows dark, headaches permanent, as you live through the day as a skeleton of yourself— no longer able to hold any love within you as it slips past your bones in seconds. You don't like the boundaries you’ve mentally set for each person to be crossed, even if it’s a perfectly normal task. In fact, some may even say you’re scared of change. You don’t like to put a label on these things, hell you don't even like to think too hard on these things. It begins to make sense when you sit and reflect, piecing all the reasons for your behaviour together until you hit the final point. Soon you’re done, finally aware of the most significant reasoning behind your antics. The only issue is, being self aware doesn't mean you get any better; no matter how many nights you sit and stare at that mirror, nothing changes.

The only thing you gained was the ability to squash down the parasite from prying eyes. Excuses fall from your lips quickly, no matter how bad you feel when they give you that look of disappointment. It’s not your fault— you know you won't be able to handle an outing like that, you’d get too worked up. Why? You don't need to dwell on it, not right now. This continues for multiple people, multiple soldiers for two weeks, until you're ‘normal’ and you hang around others again. People begin to subconsciously catch on and so your little routine continues to carry on moving so well, staying right on track.

“Sarge? You aint comin’ to team night? Why?”

Ghost stands at the door of your quarters, dressed in his typical training attire whilst you’re sitting in something cozy, made for home wear. You have to fight the urge to cover yourself up. “Oh right.. i, uh..yknow, lot of paperwork to do. Thought i’d stay in.”

You say with a small smile, attempting to ease any concerns he had before but little did you know, he was already growing aware of your little issue, or at least the fact there was one within you. “Paperwork? On a Friday? You should be relaxin’.” You grit your teeth a little, the burning urge inside of your chest returning just like the sick pit in your stomach. It felt so awful fearing just a simple team night out, but it was just so late and you were so tired— you didnt have the energy to be rational the whole time, to think of your next move constantly.

“It’s not a big deal. I’ll come to the next one.” You shrug, turning back to your small desk as you pull another small stack of papers in front of you. His boots thump loudly against the floorboards, sounding like the heavy thump of your heart in your ears. It stops, suddenly, behind your back and your body stiffens as he leans down, looking at the paperwork you’re going through. It’s a lie— naturally, you finished it all. He doesn't even have to stare at you first nor visibly raise a brow; you’re already waiting for him to call out your bluff just as quickly.

“You can just say you want some time alone, yknow.” That catches you off guard, half expecting him to just tell you to stop whining and grab some drinks. His words were still difficult though, how could you easily just say that? Of course, the words itself aren't the hard part, nor speaking it—it’s the implications behind said words. An excuse means you have other things to occupy you, so no one dares to disturb you much after that, however explaining you want some alone time gives way to more questions. Specifically the first being: why? Then they begin to wonder if you’ve been doing okay recently or if you’re struggling with something. You dont like the idea of that at all— people thinking about you in that way. It feels weird, almost like it’s wrong. Sometimes you wished people would just not care, and leave you alone to wallow with yourself.

“Sarge?” You snap out of it, sheepishly scratching the back of your head as he still stands behind you and you turn in your chair, putting the best meek face you can on for the night. “What? No, that’s not why I declined. I’m not really feeling any alcohol today and a new episode of a series I previously binged on the weekend just came out. Sorry.. didn't want to make it seem i was ditching anyone for a show.” Perfect, an awkward grin had tied it all off into a well constructed excuse. Even if it was partially true and this really wasn't fake, it sure felt like everything you did was an act. After all, you really didn't want them to think you were ditching anyone, and you didn't feel like having any alcohol tonight. “A new series” He says gruffly, and you nod with a tight smile, teeth gritting so hard you’re sure they’ll break in a few seconds. “I’ll join you then.”

You blink once, twice, three times in pure utter confusion. Ghost—The Ghost, whose name is rumoured across the battlefield and known for never giving into idle small talk—wants to watch the series you lied about, with you.

You’ve never felt more guilty in your entire life, practically fumbling for a solution. You could just tell the truth, say no and admit you needed to be alone. But this is the first time he’s ever expressed wanting to hang around you, actually together and alone— and miss out on a team night?! He may just want an excuse out of it, but still, you can't just say no now. “Well yeah, i just..” You hate how there’s no easy way out of this in the slightest, torn between saving your own mental health or finally getting close to the teammate who you’ve been on eggshells around for nearly a year now. “My room’s not exactly clean--“

He cuts you off with a gruff, shake of his head, a scoff resounding in his next words, promptly embarrassing you too. “There ya go— knew you wanted to be alone.”

You fumble, not understanding how he managed to pry it out of you so fast, just a simple lie blowing your cover. “I said it wasn't like-“

“See you tomorrow.” He’s gone just as fast as he silenced you, heavy footsteps disappearing out of your door and down the corridors. What you couldn't wrap your head around is how fast he had figured it out and made you confess to your lies that fast— it was a real problem, something you couldn't just let slide. If he knew, did others too?

Unfortunately for you, the very much needed alone time didn’t help as well as it usually did considering this new information has threatened everything that made up the core of your very being—specifically everything keeping you glued together. You just couldn't sit there and possibly relax like you usually did when alone (more specifically think over everything you’ve done wrong until you quite literally fell asleep mid thought)— not when Ghost could clearly read everything you had ever thought about in your life.

That being said, you’ve been a nervous wreck all week, concentrating so hard on looking sane that you’ve barely paid a second of attention to things you should’ve listened to. It’s not like you slipped up regularly, but before that day you were already feeling pretty uneasy and now with still no relief and the added stress, you feel like you really might lose it any second now. Every time you see him, every word exchanged with your teammates—with another person—it eats at you, tugging further on the ropes you’re hanging onto. They’re already been pulled thin, especially since you’ve been put in charge of a group of rookies for the past few weeks now. Of course, you had pulled the short straw when assignments went round because not only did your group love to talk back, but they loved to test every limit by asking the most stupid of questions possible. It’s the second time now you’ve had to lecture one of the rookies about why you can’t just ‘throw a grenade at the enemies’. It’s only temporary, just basic training exercises and medical procedures they need to know until the Officer, who usually oversees them, returns from their sick leave.

You let out a long breath as you enter the small break room, also known as taskforce 141’s meeting room but they’ve let you lounge in here too many times to count. It’s quiet in here, Soap and Gaz both on missions and you assume Ghost must be too. It’s the first time you’ve been able to relax all week, knowing damn well Price is down in London with Gaz. Your shoulders sag, the miserable look returning to cover your features now that you don't need to pull that tight smile anymore. Your chest physically aches from how anxious you’ve been all day, the weight of the day’s mistakes and fears of the future swelling deep in your gut. You know it’s a Friday, know you should just take a long sleep but you can’t help but think about all you have to do for the days to follow. You’re busy the whole day tomorrow, a team outing you can’t deny no matter how much you really do not want to go. Just thinking of all the final work you’ll have to cram in on Sunday makes a splitting pain run along the bumps in your brain. Even your breaths begin to feel shorter, an uncomfortable feeling that you just still cant rid of no matter how long you take deep breaths. Your eyes are weighed down with exhaustion and yet your brain refuses to let you sleep yet. No, you cannot. If you sleep the night away then you’ll only have Sunday left for yourself, and that won't work out, will it?

You pick up the mug you had just stirred, hoping the drink would soothe at least something if not your dehydrated body. Taking a small sip, the hot liquid spills down your throat, leaving a warm feeling in your ribs. “Alone by choice or force?” A gruff voice rings out behind you, along with an arm reaching around to supposedly grab a teabag as well, is enough to make you flinch. Stumbling on your own feet, your mug jolts and the steaming water splashes against your shoulder. If you were worried about someone catching you so vulnerable before, you were certainly terrified now, especially since your skin was burning from a small startle.

“Fuck— sorry—“

Ghost’s gloved hand settle on one side of your waist while the other quickly takes the mug from your hands and places it upon the counter. You cant respond, barely processing the situation and everything just feels like too much and your skin feels so hot, you know he’s seeing you fall apart and still there’s nothing you can do—

Your thoughts snap to a blank when he presses the cold rag against your burning skin. Thankfully the layers of the training uniform stops any severe marks from forming. His other hand rubs your cheek, his mask so close it could brush your face, and you can actually see every speck of brown in his irises. You can't look at him for long though, moving your gaze away quickly, not when you know what you’ve done. For the past week or two you’ve hated him, painting the most horrible picture in your mind. It wasnt even on purpose, you’ve just started seeing everything wrong about him. He doesnt give the rookies much mercy, nor does he particularly entertain any of Soap’s antics even when the situation is pretty lax. He’s boring, he seems to care about nothing but himself somedays, he refuses to let you do something stupid and he never takes that damn mask off even when you’re all supposed to trust one another. You’ve lied to him, yes, forgetting about your hatred when he made you laugh with those gruff remarks. But he’s not the only one— no, you’ve began to hate everyone in this task force, picking at them and every little thing. It’s weird, you don't want to victimize yourself, because you know you’ve done just as much wrong too. But still, somedays you really can't look past the list of things you dislike about your own friends.

“Are you alright? I havent seen you all week.”

Of course he hasn't, you’ve been avoiding them all. It’s nearly impossible to think straight these days and you knew you wouldn’t be able to fake it so naturally, you just stayed away. The more you did it, the better it began to feel. Avoiding them was the solution— you were just the thorn in their side with your tricky mood swings and anxiety always painting them to be the villain. You couldnt just allow this to happen, to destroy them with your issues even if they had no idea about it.

But now, face to face with him, all you feel is unexplainable guilt for everything you’ve done to them— how could you even hate them for a second? His hand is still rubbing at your skin, nudging your face gently upwards just so you’d at least look at him for a second. “Really? The silent treatment now?.” He sighs and you hate yourself, how did you let this spiral to this point— to where he’s apologising to you and yet you wish you could just disappear. Isnt this what you wanted? For everyone to be kind to you? So why are you running— why do you refuse care?

Your lips press together as your teeth bite down on the soft flesh, torn from how much you’ve picked at the skin the whole week. It aches with anxiety, and your teeth hurt from how often you’ve clenched them so hard they scraped against eachother. The only thing you can do is stand there as Ghost fusses over you, trying to get you to move a damn muscle instead of falling apart silently like some kind of broken watch, unable to move forward or backwards. Just still.

“Sarge— snap out of it, look, I'm sorry. Okay?”

His hands are still on you, and you’ve begged for a day where someone would care this much about you and still, you step back, almost afraid. “I’m sorry, Ghost.” You croak out, your hands reaching up to your eyes as you wipe at your skin obsessively, trying to hide and stop anything from leaking. “Why’re you apologising?” He says gruffly, confused by all of this, this sudden onslaught of emotion.

He’s not stupid, he had a feeling you weren't quite yourself this week. Stupidly, he figured you’d just deal with it on your own. That's what everyone did, right? He knows he just takes a breather when he feels a little rough— even Price had his own battles. Comfort isn't a strong point for Ghost, not even when he was Simon Riley, never has and he never thinks it will be. He’s born and bred on violence and the coldness that comes after it, the lack of warmth even as hot blood trickles and emptiness consumes the space where his fellow soldiers should be. So watching you crumble right before him, apologising profusely while your body wracks with shaken breaths, makes something stop in him too. He doesn't know how he’ll do it, but he knows damn well no one fights alone anymore.

“Look at me.”

He says firmly, both his hands landing firmly on your shoulders, one hand even tempted to just force your chin up but you shake your head profusely. “Why not?” He stays patient for you, even if he knows he may have to force you soon— its the least he can do for you. “I cant look at you. Not after everything i did.” He pauses, hands now settling on your jaw in confusion, he knows this is moving towards an interrogation but he has to know. “What are you talking about?! What did you do?”

“I hated all of you! I avoided you all and destroyed our relationship, i fucked it all up.”

With that he cant stand to see this continue, a gloved hand firmly planted over your mouth as the other wraps around your back. He leads you to the couch even as you squirm, not caring in the slightest. He knows he has strength and not comfort, so he’ll use it to shut you up whilst the truth comforts you instead.

“Look at me.” He says sternly and you do, eyes snapping up with wide fear as you look at him. “That’s not true— okay? None of us consider our relationship with you ruined, not one of us has even mentioned you in a bad light at all.” He makes sure your whole body is pressed against the back of the couch, considering that you didnt particularly look as if you could hold yourself up right now.

“Soap has only talked to me about you once recently— he told me you helped him organize the training schedules for the rookies. Told me to thank you for it because he felt he did not express his gratitude enough. Do you understand now? No one’s mad at you– not one of us have even considered anything to have gone wrong.”

His hand grabs your own, settling it on the center of his chest so you can feel the pattern of his breathing, silently praying you’d try and match it. You can only blink at him though, slowly processing his words with each passing second until his hand leaves your mouth and your lips part, breath hitched before you swallow a sharp breath. “I’ve avoided all of you– i’ve been hating all of you.” You choke out, chest clenching with regret and the weight of unreasonable guilt and his other hand moves to hold your face again, his brown eyes piercing into yours with his silence.

“What is like to hate someone?”

“What?”?

“What is it like to hate someone?” He repeats, his thumb pressing gently into the curve of your cheek.

“I-...” You falter, thinking for a moment before your lips part again. “I dont like things that they do— the way they act and everything about them.”

“You’d avoid them too, right? Like that general you hated. Remember when he touched you and you pushed his hand away?

You nod along in agreement, breathing a bit slower to hopefully ease the pressure on your chest at the moment.

“Y-yeah.. i’d express my dislike clearly..”

“So why did you never push me away the past few weeks? You said you avoided us, but you would always speak to us if we needed to. You still helped Soap too.”

You pause, blinking at him in confusion now, you had convinced yourself that you hated them so why did you never.. actually express it?

“You’re also letting me touch you now and last week you didn't want to hang out with us, but you didnt want to hurt our feelings by saying that.”

You’re left silent, baffled and confused because in your head, you were being horrible to them, hating their guts like it was nothing.

“I think… whatever is going on in that head of yours.” He says slowly, tapping at your forehead gently as you look up at him with widened eyes. “You’ve held it in for too long. You’ve dwelled on those thoughts, so self aware of your own anxieties that you’ve distorted reality. You think you’ve done something bad, because you can't understand why you always feel so bad.” His voice is softer than usual, even if his words are still gruff and holds his thick Manchester accent.

Somehow that alone reminds you that Simon has never lied, not even once, to you. That stern voice of his is straightforward, doesnt mess around and forces his way through any problem. Just like he had just pushed himself to the root of your mind and destroyed your seeds of doubt.

“You’re allowed to talk to us you know. I have a funny feeling you’re scared o’ somethin’. Not sure what just yet.”

He doesnt force you to respond, just speaking his thoughts even if that’s what you usually do when you’re together. The couch creaks as he stand up, pulling you to get up aswell beside him. He places a hand on the crook of your back, gently encouraging you to begin walking towards the door. “Cmon, back to my room. Lets get you cleaned up properly.”

Before you know it, you’re sitting against the headboard of his bed, something you had only felt months ago when you first came here, scared and confused over a stupid hornet. You trusted him to help you then, but you dont understand why you suddenly felt that fear again. Meanwhile, your shirt is half off, Ghost sat on the bed beside you as he inspects the burns on your chest from the tea. It’s harsh, the skin reddened but not enough to be something serious thankfully. He presses a cool towel against it, soothing the stinging skin but he knows it’ll fade out soon enough. You’re wearing his old shirt, and he gave you some comfortable sweatpants too for good measure. You just watch all his moves so quietly, feeling like a ghost yourself in this moment from how detached you are. It’s weird, feeling so much yet nothing at the same time.

“Nothing too bad, should be alright by the morning.” He hums, lifting the fresh mug of tea he brewed for you and brings it to your lips for you to sip before he steals some for himself. “Is your chest still tight?” You blink, not expecting him to ask that of all things because you hadnt exactly mentioned that part and yes, it was. “How did you know..?” Your hand reaches out, silently asking for more of the tea he graciously lets you sip, unable to fathom how he brews it so perfectly each time. “You were clutching at your chest before and your breaths are a little shorter than they should be.” He’s seen straight through you again so you slump your shoulders and just nod quietly. “Yeah, it’s really tight. It’s always like this and i dont know how to make it stop.”

His gloved hand reaches out, gently rubbing at your chest thus making you sink a little back into the pillows. Before he can respond, you speak up with a quiet confession. “That day, when you came ‘round, I was upset. You said you wanted to watch the series with me and I felt so bad. I didn't want to give up my only chance of spending time with you, but I knew my head couldn't take it.”

He nods along quietly, letting you reveal it all to him. “T-then you figured me all out and i got scared— i didnt want someone to know everything about me because i didnt want to be a problem. I want someone to listen but i dont want to be seen as something different. I just.. i dont know how to handle all of this. I dont feel like the person i am when i look in the mirror.”

The strangest thing of all is that it didnt actually take you long to figure it out. You knew all along, of course, but when you’re fighting against yourself, you’re supporting both sides and so a part of you decided not to dwell on a certain bit of information too much. The reason for that to be pushed aside is no part of you wanted to face it.

Your heart always secretly wished someone would find out— that someone would push past the walls you’ve banged so hard against even if they were crafted by the webs of your brain. You prayed and prayed that they’d read through it all, express their concern and one day, one day you’d be saved from this hellish feeling. It was a common daydream for you and yet you were terrified of it. If someone knew, there was no guarantee they’d follow the fantasy. They could ridicule you, or they couldnt be able to comfort you at all, maybe they’d try and it wouldnt even do anything or maybe, just maybe— they wouldnt give a damn about it. What happened then? If that daydream was real, and that was the final outcome, there was no turning back in time. It seemed like only one person would ever figure you out, after all, no one had up until this point.

But then Simon became aware, and you got terrified. You hid away because you were too scared to know his reaction to your problems, even more so his reaction to you. You wanted someone to help, you really did, and yet your brain feared to know the uncertain future of it.

His ungloved hands card through your hair, the callouses gentle against your scalp as he slowly scratches at it. “You need to speak with us, and the others. Your feelings are real— hell, we all have our doubts. I used to feel it before every mission. Soap began to tell me his, then Gaz joined too. Price always looks for a way to solve it, and i give my two pence when i feel i want to. Just cause you feel different, doesnt mean you are. Plenty o’ people felt the same way you did before.”

“Really..? I’m not like.. crazy?”

“No, never. Even if you do some stupid shit sometimes.”

That makes you finally crack a real smile, even if its small and you’re unable to stifle the small chuckle that bubbles in your throat and although he’s the epitome of stoicism, he smiles beneath the mask. “Everyone’s out on a mission, ya can't leave me alone tonight. C’mere.”

You settle yourself in the crook of arm as he lays back against the bed with you, propping up his laptop on his lap as he searches for a good movie.

“You better report back to me everyday this week, alright? I want you here at nine pm sharp, dressed in your pajamas. That’s an order.”

Thinking over all your previous daydreams of how this would eventually go, this was far from how you expected it to be. Firstly, you never expected Ghost, nor it to happen in the military at all. Perhaps you thought maybe later in life it’d occur or maybe Soap or Price would figure it out. Either way, you arent actually upset over it. No one would be your fairy tale saviour in life, coming forward to fight the demons that plagued your head all the time. Even so, the way Ghost had shut you up and calmed you down makes you think he’s pretty damn close to being one, even if knights usually dont scoff at their princess.

He doesnt even look like he’d be willing to give a little kid a hug, but still, you couldnt be happier with how this turned out in the end. Compared to fairytale princes and men in the movies, you knew Ghost and you knew he was serious— so if he wanted to help you, he would. And no, he wouldnt ridicule you throughout the process, nor ever feel like you’ve been misheard. You know that if you spoke to Ghost, he’d listen earnesty and never forget, carrying that around with him even if those anxieties eventually died out.

You knew he’d always linger around, never forgetting you or leaving you behind. Just like a Ghost.

“Okay, i promise i will.”

You say softly, pressing your cheek against the curve of his chest, the faint thump of his heartbeat drowning out any lost thoughts. He was your support, and no matter how bad it got for you, no matter how many times you get overwhelmed and lash out, not even when you avoid everyone— he’d never break away. No, he would always be beside you.

[cable-salamdr]

The growing pile in question

Does anyone else have this problem where you keep picking up minifigs from their supposed-to-be-designated-spot to take around, but then afterwards instead of putting them back into Their Spot you put them at the edge of your desk, eventually accumulating into a pile of minifigs that are just laying there and judging you for constantly forgetting?

Or is that just me

[boolger]

The science of love 🌙 ch 4

Call of Duty AU ✨ Poly!141 x Nikolai x hybrid!Reader ✨ MDNI ✨ Explicit ✨ ao3

<- last chapter x next chapter ->

Tags: F!reader, hybrid reader, description of former torture, dubcon and noncon, rape, hybrid!people being kept as pets, Call of duty alternative universe, dark, angst to comfort, kinda in a fucked up way ya know, punishments, spanking, mistreatment and abuse to hybrids, the dove is dead, or at least its close to death, heat/mating cycles (no omegaverse), no pregnancy, reader knows how to stand up for herself, anger issues, animal tails and ears, trauma, violence, angst, collars, rough sex, breeding kink, threesome, orgy basically, everyone is fucking your honor, enemies to lovers, piss kink, reader has a pussy, chubby!reader, hurt!reader, pet names, a couples of OCs here and there, gotta add some extra backgrounds character ya know, vague mentions of a character’s death in the past (it’s Roach. Sorry Roach lovers.)

A/n: ahem, this one is angsty, remember the tags. Also Angus Macgyver and Jack Dalton from Macgyver 2016 kinda appears in this chapter and i have no other excuse than the fact that i love them. Mwah.

💫✨💫✨💫

“How did you learn all of this?”

“You mean how can I be smart and be a hybrid?” You asked back sarcastically, watching the woman who in return looked back at you like she was bored, so you added a snappy “are you also amazed by the fact that I can read and spell, lady?”

By the look that grew on her face, you were pretty sure she was as annoyed at you, as you were with her.

“Behave.” It was a simple word coming from the grim reaper in the corner, yet it was a strong warning. You were honestly relieved that you were still too beat up to be actually punished… because you were pretty sure it might involve a spanking or perhaps running rounds on a field, as if you were one of their small privates.

You let out a tired sigh, tipping your one good hybrid ear towards the woman, who had introduced herself as Kate Laswell a little earlier.

You had seen her before, yet you hadn’t really cared about her - you tried not to care about any of them. Despite the collar still resting around your neck, you were not going to stay around.

As for Laswell, you had a suspicion that she wasn’t going to leave without any answers - and you didn’t really have any urge to spill many secrets.

“I learned it the way everyone learns things. From being taught and through trial and error,” you finally replied, crossing your still bandaged hands, “but I assume you want to know who exactly taught me?”

“Yes.”

“A scientist.”

“Kitty.” The warning tone was back. It was still an awful name, chosen without your consent. As always. You gave him a nasty look, rolled your eyes before continuing.

“Fine, fine - when they first took me, there were several scientists around. I knew how to read beforehand, so I was their assistant for a while, learning how to do certain things.”

“Did your owner sell you to them?”

You snapped your mouth shut again. You leant back in the bed some more, ears tipping backwards a little. Some things were better left in the past. Your tail rose a little, but you knew there was not much scary about you right now.

“Listen, we cannot help you wi—“

“With what? I’m not going back to any of my former owners and I don’t really wanna stay with Jack Skeleton either.”

“You are walking the line—“ said skeleton man began but you merely ignored him, cutting him off.

”They’re dead - all of the scientists are dead! What good will it do for me to tell you?” You snarled at the woman, ears tipping backwards in anger, “You knowing who they were, can never bring them back! I lived with them for ten years! Do you have any idea what it’s like to be the last one standing now? And I’m not even a human, I’m not even considered a person! I’m even less than they ever were, even when captured!”

The room was silent for two heartbeats and the anger that made you growl out the truth, disappeared again.

You closed your mouth, immediately regretting everything you had just said, all of the details you had let slip. A deep growl left you, as the woman took a couple of notes; the urge to jump up and take the notebook was big, rip the pages about you apart with your teeth, while snarling like a feral dog.

Maybe even swallowing a couple of the pieces, just for good measure. You could feel saliva collecting in your mouth, teeth baring, your body beginning to tense up, ready to jump and-

”Behave,” Ghost took a hold of your collar, giving it a little tug towards him - when the fuck had he even moved? - his hand didn’t hurt you, instead it moved to gently run along your shaved head, making you freeze as he scratched the spot behind one of your ears, “thank you for telling us, Kitty, but no growling.”

”Go fuck yourself.” You muttered, making the giant huff.

”So, you’re at least 20, I presume?” She asked but you looked away, down at the duvet and then at your bandaged ankle. You had let too much slip. Much of the information they would figure out along the way, but still. You didn’t like this.

She turned a few pages in a file, then spoke again, as if you hadn’t fully ignored her question.

”There are mentions of a Dr. B. Agerdrup - a biologist and chemist - together with a Dr. K. Peko, a surgeon and described as an expert in blood experiments,” Laswell said and you stared down at the duvet covering your lower body, “Did you meet them?”

You ignored her. Ignored Ghost as he gave your human ear a little tug, in an attempt to get a reaction from you

Laswell took a file from beneath her notepad, rummaging through a couple of pages.

”Throughout the years of the files, a person appears regularly, only going by the name Dog, sometimes just D,” Laswell continued, her voice calm, “Am I right to assume that this is you?”

You tried not remembering their faces, yet they flashed by as you closed your eyes; you remembered their names, their ages, their voices. The way their hands felt when they stroked your cheek or how they would all attempt to keep the guards from you.

You still knew how they liked their coffee or tea and their different, preferred ways of taking notes.

It was the memories of them smiling, when they had told you about their life outside, about how they had all been promised to let go after you all finished the project. The moment they could create the serums together, and finish the weapons, they would all be free - you included.

Angus, sweet and kind Angus, had promised he would bring you with him, so that you wouldn’t just be sold to somebody. That he would make sure you could get a nice life with him and his longtime boyfriend, who was out in the world somewhere, no doubt still looking for his fiance. He had proposed, just before they took Angus.

He promised you a life with them, a promise and a dream that kept you going, both of you, throughout the years. A life with love, without pain. A life where you could be happy, maybe go somewhere else in the world together with him… have your own room, your own safe space. Never be chained again. A life where you could love who you wanted, touch who you wanted, be loved, be…

The two people in the room kept talking, but you weren’t hearing them, not really. In your mind you were together with Angus and the other scientists, walking on a beach in Italy, like one of them, one of the sweetest women you had ever met, had talked about. Going to her hometown, a small Italian village, enjoy the warmth of the sun. You would all have sand between your toes, Agerdrup would grumble about it, Kenny would try to push Angus into the water, his fiance trying to save him, Beatrice almost falling over with laughter, and you would chase seagulls all day long.

Hands cradled your face and for a moment, a short moment, you were convinced it was Angus, who did so; that he was alive, that it was his hands, warm and gentle, touching you while telling you something completely meaningless, so you didn’t get too lost in your thoughts.

Even when Angus had been dying, he had kept promising that all of you would leave together, voice shaky and weak; by then you had known they were all lies, not malicious ones, but desperate ones. He believed in those lies himself, in a self soothing way to survive and continue. Even into death. You had lied too then, hoping it would ease his fears and pains, so you had promised Jack, his fiance, would be there any minute to save them, and he had seemed to believe you, even though, deep inside, you had both known it wasn’t the truth.

The guards had let you and Agerdrup hold Angus as he passed away, blond hair sprawled across your lap. The two of you had attempted to make sure Angus wasn’t in too much pain. You hadn’t been sure whether he was, but he looked relieved when he took his last breath.

Now, was he cradling your face? Had you died?

You blinked, confused over the tears in your eyes for a second; then the voice of the man cradling your face in his big hands, returned. The smells of the rooms in your prison for a decade disappeared, replaced by a scent of gunpowder and cigarettes.

”Breathe for me, Kitty,” Ghost’s voice was gentle, even though he told you as an order, “C’mon, Kitty, be good and take a deep breath, yeah?”

You let out a whine, your mind desperately trying to get back to Angus, claw your way back to Italy with your scientist family, to live in a daydream where none of them died. Desperate to hear their voices, desperate to find a way back to them.

”Do it,” He kept his voice gentle but the command was stronger, and your inner hybrid was screaming at you to be a good girl and do as told.

Your lungs burned painfully when you finally managed to take a breath; it created a painful chain reaction of burning gasps and whines, your lungs filling up with warm embers, unable to cool down. The breaths almost hurt more than you felt worth it.

Pain. So much pain. Who was going to save you from that? Who would take away your precious memories, that haunted you deeply, and help you survive without them?

It took you a good couple of minutes to get your breathing under control, to be able to see the skull wearing man in front of you, to no longer attempt to go back to Italy; he was softly cooing, whispering praises.

Laswell was gone. You weren’t sure when she had left, but you didn’t really care. Ghost kept telling you it was alright, that you were a good puppy.

You didn’t feel like one.

You bit his gloved thumb. It was a pathetic attempt at gaining some power. There was barely any force behind it really and Ghost hardly acknowledged it. Just made a couple of clicking sounds with his tongue, keeping eye contact with you. You were the one to give in, letting go of his thumb, licking your lips, looking away as your ears tipped down.

Ghost patted your head.

💫✨💫✨💫

Simon stared up at the ceiling of the bedroom. Nikolai crawled over Johnny who let out an annoyed sound, then Ghost, he could lay next to Ghost, pressed against the wall. He let out a pleased groan as he settled and out of reflex, Simon turned, leaning forward to him, meeting the older man’s lips in a kiss. The Russian man let out a pleased hum.

“Still thinking about Kitty, da?”

“She disappeared into her mind.” Simon knew what it was like. To suddenly stop breathing, stuck somewhere in the past, but the change in you had been so sudden, that it caught him off guard. He had sent Laswell away, so he could help you himself.

The sooner you got out of that bed, the better.

“Whether she wants to admit it or not, she has been through some hard things, ” John said from the other end of the bed, looking up from his book, reading glasses resting on his nose, “ you’re helping her, Simon. Even if she doesn’t know it.”

Simon looked at his boyfriend for a moment. He knew the older man was right, knew that the moment he could get you up and going, things would become easier. Then he looked away again. What if it didn’t become easier?

What if you ended up spending most of your time in the kennel on the base? Surrounded by working hybrids who you couldn’t relate to. Without some sort of goal, without proper relationships, would that be worse than the place you had been held captive at for a decade?

Simon was itching to give you a routine to follow, to give you simple rules and watch you flourish. To help you not hate every single human being you came across. He wanted to kiss you, and show you pleasure when you behaved and, gods, if he didn’t want to spank your arse sore from your constant snapbacks.

He wanted to show you that they weren’t like your captors. That they would not let your fur turn into matts or let you become weak and sick. They would take care of you.

“She is gonna bite your fingers off, Si,” Gaz muttered, face pressed against the pillow, as if he was ready to be knocked out. Like a philosophical thought before bed.

“Ach, as if Simon will let ‘er,” Johnny answered before Simon could say anything, “nah, wee thing is gonna bite yer arse off, Garrick.”

“Not his ass,” Nikolai muttered into Simon’s skin, rather dramatically, “I am fond of said arse.”

John gave Kyle a couple of pats on the ass, as if to silently agree with the last statement .

Simon huffed at their talk. He wouldn’t let you bite Kyle’s ass - not unless he asked, of course - but he would help you learn not to bite, unless when told to. A muzzle. He should probably order a nice muzzle, one that wouldn’t be too uncomfortable to wear.

“I’ll make sure your ass stays safe,” Simon dryly noted.

Simon hadn’t been able to save Roach. He had been a real struggle too, especially in the beginning, but he had ended up as a really good boy. Devoted. Kind. Perfect. Simon hadn’t been able to save him, but he was going to save you.

Whether you wanted to or not.

💫✨💫✨💫

You growled, forcing yourself harder into the corner of the room.

They weren’t here yet, but right now, escaping didn’t seem like a likely possibility - sadly. The nurses were all speaking, trying to calm you down, though they all looked afraid of you; in truth, you didn’t like the idea of people fearing you, but if that was the price of escaping, then you would pay it.

One of them, a bigger guy stepped forward and you tipped your ears even further back, snarling loudly at him. You had already bitten one of them, you liked to think that they didn’t want to get bitten too.

Your foot in the cast hurt a bit, but it wasn’t worse than some things you had tried before. It was odd to be fully up and walking, even if you hadn’t walked long.

As you took a step forward, they all took one back. Good. Good, maybe this was your chance.

The moment you heard one of them mentioning sedatives, you snapped. You had tried being shot with a dart of sedatives before - it wasn’t a pleasant feeling, but even worse, it meant you would lose consciousness, then go back to square one. If not with worse possibilities of escaping, since they would probably up the safety around you.

You had forced some of your claws out - the ones you had left - proving and though your fingers hurt from the mere idea of them getting stuck in something, you didn’t care.

Filled with momentarily courage, you charged towards the little group of nurses. You had no actual intention of attacking them, but you weren’t going to tell them that. In all honesty, you were surprised by the fact that they stumbled backwards, out of the room, almost falling over each other.

You used the moment to dart out, running rather awkwardly, trying to get as far away as possible.

However, your success was momentary.

Big arms circled you from behind, fully lifting your chubby body off the ground, seemingly with no effort at all. You snarled and twisted in the grip, claws digging into any exposed skin you could reach, barking and screaming. While kicking the man, who let out a grunt of pain from the claws in his skin, you attempted to twist enough to bite his face. It was all out of instinct, of anger and desperation.

You recognised the voice, the strong Russian accent, but you refused to give up.

One of the arms around your chest let go, and in the next moment a hand curled around your face, fully covering your eyes. He kept speaking, telling you it was okay, to calm down, as if you couldn’t smell his blood, feel it wet your fingertips.

It wasn’t going to be okay - you wouldn’t be free, you wouldn’t…

Much to your confusion, your body just…

Calmed down.

You let out a frustrated growl, but you stopped kicking - or at least kicking as hard as before. His breath tickled the little fur that was growing on your dog ears. His grip around your waist became gentler.

Darkness overwhelmed your mind. Somehow making you more calm and you hated it. Hated how you barely fought as he pulled you back towards the room.

A needle pushed into your arm then. Growling seemed meaningless. You whimpered instead.

💫✨💫✨💫

A groan left your lips. Your head was pounding, your lips dry. You let out a yawn, only to blink tiredly when the movement felt restricted.

There was something on your face. You felt like you were underwater as you raised a hand, touching your face.

Leather. Metal.

You blinked a little harder, forcing your eyes to remain open this time. Only to meet the stare of your so-called new “owner”. Quite an angry, cold stare, the big mountain of a man. He had crossed arms, one of his balaclavas with a skull painted on - yet it was easy to see he was upset - as well as a pair of leather cuffs in his hands.

Shit. You were in trouble. You had known you would be from the start, as soon as the nurse grumbled that you were an annoying mutt - that she didn’t understand why they hadn’t put you down instead - because then your teeth had sunk into her hand. The blood had tasted like bitter, metallic victory, even if you had essentially proved her right.

Perhaps they should have put you down. But they hadn’t. You had made that her problem. Had you been more awake, you might have hoped the bite would get infected.

Finally your mind caught up with you. The leather and metal on your face, well head really, was a muzzle. The metal in front let you breathe freely, but kept you from biting anyone.

You let out a little whimper, ears tipping down as Simon just stared at you. Disappointment. It had been a while since that had affected you, but as the two of you almost had a silent conversation, you actually felt ashamed.

“Care to explain yourself?” Finally, he broke the silence, even if a part of you would have preferred to keep it. You were in a different bed, but still in the medical wing. The bandages on your hands were gone. Your fingers were sore, but they seemed to be doing alright.

You weren’t really sure what to tell him. You were too busy fearing what the punishment would be. All the time, the man had promised he would punish you when you weren’t as sick. He had been clear when he had told you his rules. You misbehave, you earn a punishment.

“Well?” You flinched at his word, casting another glance at him, ears still down, tail thumping pathetically against the mattress, hoping he would be a little nicer.

“You’re going to be punished no matter what, Kitty,” he pointed out when you still didn’t say anything, seemingly not softening up at all, “So you might as well give me a good reason.”

You swallowed hard. Your throat felt dry, but you doubted he was in the mood to help you drink water.

“She - the nurse,” you managed, unsure of how to make him understand, understand the frustration and anger that had overwhelmed you, her words flipping a switch in your mind, “She said I was a mutt… that.. that you should just have put me down.”

Simon stared at you, brows furrowing for a moment, before tipping his head to the side.

”So you decided to prove her point, then?” His words were harsh, “Do you think that gives you an excuse to bite her?”

You looked away. The guards in the base had always been mean to you. Snarling all kinds of shit while forcing themselves upon you. Calling you all kinds of things, just to see what would make you snap.

You found yourself nodding, still refusing to meet his gaze, until a deep sigh escaped him. You dared to peek over at him, watching him pinch the bridge of his nose. You didn’t say anything, though you really wanted to repeat your point. Why should you be nice to her when she said that?

”One thing was biting her, Kitty,” Simon finally said, before he looked up again, anger visible again as he all but hissed, “another fuckin’ thing was biting Nikolai. What the fuck makes you think you can hurt my partner?”

You let out a little whimper. You knew something was up with the two of them - with all of them really. You hadn’t really thought that much about it. Whether they all were fucking or not didn’t matter. You just wanted to be free.

“I’m sorry.” You actually meant it. Genuinely, you felt a little bad for biting Nikolai. Even if he had caught you and stopped you from escaping. Bastard. Still.

”You will fuckin’ be,” he stood up so suddenly it almost made you jump, “move so your on your stomach.”

You blinked for a moment at his request. Whatever he wanted to do, you already knew that you didn’t want to be a part of it.

Your ears tipped more backwards, a low growl leaving you, a wordless refusal.

”It wasn’t a fuckin’ offer,” he snapped, “It’s a command. Roll over.”

”Fuck you.”

”You’re not making it better for yourself.”

”I’m gonna —“

You didn’t manage to say anymore, because the next moment, the mountain of a man was on the bed, manhandling you. Biting him was not possible thanks to the fucking muzzle on your head and he barely gave you a moment to scratch him.

In the matter of seconds he got your arms behind your back and pulled over his lap on your stomach. You had almost forgotten about the leather cuffs in his hand, but as they were close around each of your wrists, you let out a scared whine.

”No, no, no, I'll be good, I’m sorry—“

“Too fuckin’ late, you brat,” he hissed - and then to your horror, he easily pulled down the sweatpants you wore, your eyes widening. You trashed with renewed energy, letting out a panicked howl, but it was no use.

His big hand collided with your soft, exposed, bare ass, the sound almost echoing in the room, while you let out a howl of pain.

You could barely distinguish the words that escaped you, as you desperately begged him to stop.

Slap.

Slap.

Yet, Simon was merciless, repeatedly spanking your ass. Each hit was hard, never landing the same place as the former, somehow hurting more and more each time. He ignored your angry growls, your pitiful howls of pain and then, the loud sobs as you cried. No, you almost wailed, as the man continued to spank you.

Slap.

Slap.

Slap. Slap. Slap. Slap.

Your skin felt afire. It was like you were stuck in a nightmare, constantly looping around, pain ever present; you heard him grunt, whether from anger or exhaustion you didn’t know, but it didn’t seem to make a difference. He kept going.

Slap. Slap. Slap. Slap. Slap. Slap. Slap. Slap.

At some point, it was like your mind left your body. You could hear yourself whimper and whine, hear his hand colliding in another spank.

Slap. Slap.

You were hiding your face in the bedsheets, tears and snot soaking the inside of the muzzle, sliding through the metal bars and onto the fabric beneath you. Your body had gone fully lax, no longer tensing up with each hit. A part of you had given up, accepted that you had no control over the moment, that he was the one to decide whether you would receive pain or not.

It took a good few seconds before you registered his soft voice. Felt his short nails scratch your still quite short hair, still looking so close to buzz cut. It felt good. Better than you wanted to admit.

The spanks had stopped. You sniffled, letting out another little sob, the big man shushing you. His other hand moved to your ass again and for a moment you expected him to hit you once again. Instead it rested against your burning skin, which somehow felt nice. You felt yourself whining, but accepted it.

”Took it so well,” he said, “just had to get into it, yeah? Understand who is in control?”

You nodded, face still pressed against the bed. You almost felt like you were floating.

“You’re not going to bite Nikolai again - or any of the others. Is that understood?” His voice turned a little harder.

You nodded again. His hand stopped petting your arse, instead one of them dug into your skin, grabbing a handful of your burning flesh, making you cry out.

”Is. That. Understood?”

”Yessir,” you hurried to say, wincing at the pain, the feeling of his nails digging into your poor skin, “yes sir, i understand, im sorry, im not gonn’ bite ‘im or any of the others.”

His grip loosened. Then his hand went back to petting your ass.

”Good girl,” he muttered.

[blckbrrybasket]

Double Negative

Rafe Cameron x Fem!Reader

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: past breakup, fluff, alcohol consumption, Rafe being sweet

ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 1.8k

part 1 here

Nobody’s gonna regret this for you

If it don’t make you smile (oh)

I’ll let your skeletons shake all evening

And bless your heart for tryin’

After running into you at the party, Rafe was unable to get you out of his head. He had worked so hard to forget about you after the breakup. It wasn’t that he didn’t love you anymore, he always loved you, but that was the problem. He was sure that he would love you until his heart stopped beating and without you it caused too much pain.

Forgetting was the easy way out of what he didn’t want to feel. Therapy was the other. He had tried, seriously tried this time.

Losing you was the largest eye opener he had in a long time. Getting clean and dropping toxic people from his life had done wonders, but therapy hadn’t. Rafe couldn’t get past the walls he had built since he was ten to speak about anything besides how horrible he was.

He had always blamed himself for how you two split. He knew he was to blame, he also knew you wouldn’t blame him. Ward was unbearable to him, infiltrating every part of Rafe’s brain until he couldn’t function as himself.

Rafe was the one to distance himself, focusing on getting his father’s approval. You were the one who broke up with him after so many lonely nights, struggling with your own mental health. Yet, you knew how Ward was. Without him you were positive Rafe wouldn’t have destroyed himself the way he did.

There was no one that could have saved either of you. Sometimes you have to go on your own to fix the problems. Rafe was certain you had said that before. You were always so wise. That’s all he could think about as he tilted his head back, downing his rum.

Drinking was an expensive habit picked up from his dad, but it was safer than the drugs he used to do. 

He had yet to see you working at the end of the counter. Rafe a few months ago would be at the country club, but now he was at a fancy bar in one of the nearby hotels. He didn’t like the recognition that he got at the country club anymore. 

Setting the glass down with a small thunk, Rafe lifted his eyes to the mirror behind the counter. He studied the eyebags that had come months ago and refused to leave. His hair had grown back out, closer to how you had known it when you first started dating Rafe.

He sucked in the side of his cheek, biting it while his eyes drifted around the space. Naturally they gravitated towards you, not even questioning why you were working there. Rafe wondered if you had quit your other job. There was zero chance that you had been fired.

You were an excellent employee, he was biased but also correct. Watching you now, dutifully making drinks while keeping conversation up with businessmen only strengthened his argument.

Rafe was too far to hear the comments of the man though. I’m on a business trip. The misses didn’t want to tag along. You’re so pretty and smart, you must be a heartbreaker. Your eye had been incessantly twitching since he had started speaking to you.

Feeling the second pair of eyes on you, you looked over to find Rafe. Instead of feeling unnerved at the second man staring at you, your stressed expression melted some. No matter what happened you were safe. Sighing imperceptibly, you turned back to the man.

“Sir, you have a wife,” you started at a volume you knew Rafe could hear as well as other patrons, “I know she isn’t here, but I doubt she would want you flirting with your bartender. Am I correct?” The man’s eyes widened, thoroughly shocked in how you spoke to him. Rafe’s eyebrows raised, looking quickly at the man. If he did a single thing out of line, Rafe wouldn’t hesitate to personally throw him out.

Didn’t you know who he was? Another washed up douchebag of a businessman, you’d had your fair share of them. “Ma’am I-“ the man started in an appalled tone. “No sir, I asked a question.” Your eyebrows lowered as you stood straighter, eyes casting an exasperated glance at Rafe. He chuckled silently, knowing you could hold your own.

Looking back in front of you, you tilted your head. “Would she?” The inevitable grumbling about the customer service came, his drink abandoned as he got up and briskly walked out. It had gone better than other times and you couldn’t help but wonder if it was due to him spotting Rafe as well.

Anyways, it was settled, you grabbing his half empty glass to clean. Out of anything you hadn’t expected Rafe to come over and sit on the now vacant stool. After the party a few weeks ago you had assumed he was ready to completely move on from being around you. Once again, you were wrong when it came to guessing his behavior.

“Hey,” he drummed his fingers on the counter. “Is this seat taken?” You rolled your eyes, turning around towards the sink to hide the smirk creeping up on your lips. “It is now,” you commented, sparing a look over your shoulder.

Rafe seemed pleased, smiling down at his glass. “Yeah?” He scratched behind his ear, “And is that a good thing?” Was it? You mulled over the question, placing the glass in the sink, and spun around again. “I don’t think it’s a bad thing if that’s what you’re asking.” 

Your crossed arms pressed on the counter as you leaned on them for support. Not bad, Rafe would take it. He nodded, glancing at the clock on the wall. “Good…good. Uh, what time do you get off?” With the absence of excess alcohol you had expected him to be less forward, surprise flashing in your eyes. He must have registered what he said, panicking.

“Not like that! I, uh shit, I was going to walk you to your car!” Okay, that is a way better approach. You snickered and shook your head at his worried face. “Rafe, it's fine. I’m off in like…” You looked at your phone tucked under the counter, “Five minutes?” You shrugged, “Is that fast enough for you not to lose interest?”

Rafe wished to say he could never lose interest in you, but he was sober enough to know that was a terrible idea. “It’s perfect. A minute later and I’d let you walk alone,” he said sarcastically, smirking. It was sweet to see him bantering with you again. 

“Oh and here I was thinking you were my prince charming.” Rafe snorted at your far fetched claim. “Yeah, whatever. I’m going to run to the bathroom, I’ll be back in a few.” You didn’t know that it was an excuse for him to nervously talk himself down. He needed to make sure he didn’t do anything stupid like he had plenty of times before.

You blissfully wrapped up your shift, unaware of him obsessively fixing his hair before coming back out six minutes later. Rafe swiftly found you leaning against one of the pillars in the lobby. “Ready to go?” You glanced up from your phone, a smile growing on your lips. You quickly tucked your phone in your bag and fell into step beside Rafe when he walked towards the door.

“As always,” you hummed. “Thank you,” you mumbled when Rafe held the door open for you, letting you walk out to the parking lot. “Where are you parked?” Rafe tried hard to make conversation without staring at you to study every inch of your face. If it was socially acceptable, he’d commit you to his memory any time he could.

“Second row, over there.” You pointed in the direction. It had to be a sadistic joke that Rafe had parked behind you, or maybe a subconscious need to be near you. “I’m behind you.” You didn’t have to be told that, you could see the silver of Rafe’s truck glinting under the parking lot lights.

Maybe it wasn’t intentional, either way you didn’t mind, not when his hand went to hover above the small of your back. Rafe didn’t know what was okay anymore, too scared to actually touch you and possibly scare you away. Halting for a split second, you let Rafe’s hand bump into your back, immediately walking again once it settled over your shirt.

Once again silence fell over you. It seemed to be a recurring theme in the last times you’d run into each other. The quiet seemed to linger on the border of talking about everything that was new and the long past you shared when you had once known everything about one another. Stopping at the side of your car, Rafe’s hand fell away, letting you unlock and open the driver's door.

“Drive safe, ‘kay?” You looked at him and nodded with a small, sad smile, “You too?” Rafe’s demeanor softened, hand clenching over his thigh. He already missed the feeling of touching you. “Always.” Your eyes slowly moved from his as you got into your car and started it up. Rafe granted enough space for you to pull out and drive out of the parking lot.

He didn’t get into his truck until he had watched you drive down the side road, car lights disappearing into the night. If he hadn’t pussied out at the party maybe he would be the one driving you home. You would be able to rely on him again, instead of having to do things alone.

Rafe knew you liked being self-sufficient, but he also hated knowing you didn’t have a best friend and partner by your side. You in turn hated how alone Rafe was. After cutting out the toxic people from his life, he had lost a lot of close friends.

Ultimately, it was his decision for the better, but your heart still ached for him. Could you even be that person again? Should you text him? What was the point of no contact if every time you saw each other that invisible string pulled you together?

There was no point. At some time along your journey of grieving your relationship with Rafe you had let go of the anger and sadness towards him. After the last week or so from seeing him at the party, it was impossible to think of anything but him. Red filled the front of your car, your hand moving faster than your brain to get to your pinned texts.

One text, that’s all you needed. ‘Thank you for walking me to my car 🫶 i knew you were soft’. It was sent before the light could even turn green. You tossed your phone into your passenger's seat, focusing on the rest of the drive home instead of panicking over the message.

Still near the parking lot, Rafe tapped his fingers on his steering wheel as he drove home. The ding of his phone distantly registered over his music, his eyes darting to the screen. He couldn’t read all of it, but he could clearly make out your contact name with the heart he never took out of it.

God he missed you. It couldn’t hurt to text back, right?

[thatgirlmendo]

Until the Quiet Takes Us

Prologue - more chapters to come?? Let me know if you want tagged.

Summary: Joel returns to Austin and on the way comes across the reader after she had a run in with raiders. They left her for dead but he takes pity on her and promises to stay by her side until she recovers… he didn’t anticipate enjoying your company quite as much as he does…

Pairing: joel miller x female reader

Word Count: 1273

Content Warnings: Nothing sexual (yet 😏) some gore - but not much. Age Gap - Reader is 20s

Writer Notes: Y’all I AM HOOKED on writing now. I can’t stop. This little story takes place in the area I went to college and grew up in 😬 I’m excited to write about Joel in my favorite place on earth. I have literally been writing all morning. Comments welcome! I need feedback. Have not proof read yet, but I will once completed.

Sometime in the Spring

Your head is spinning. Your tongue feels heavy. Even opening your eyes feels like too much. You squeeze them shut tighter, trying to focus — trying to remember.

You’d been trekking along the outskirts of Austin, alone now after the last of your group was lost to looters. Cautious and careful you were hopeful that you might scavenge enough supplies to get the hell out of this city for good and continue your plan to head west.

You'd heard Austin was abandoned, that it had been picked clean, ravaged, empty.

And you had believed it. You let your guard down, even just for a moment.

You thought, if nothing else, maybe you could find a place to lay your head for the night, somewhere semi familiar.

It had been years since you’d seen the city you grew up in — and the sight of its skeleton hit harder than you expected. The plan had been to keep moving west, toward the hills, hoping to find old prepper bunkers or forgotten supplies hidden deep in the mountains.

But something pulled you back. Something you couldn't explain.

You knew you were making a mistake the second you stepped closer to the old city center. You knew it, and still but you kept walking.

The layout in front of you brought a small smile to your face. You remembered this place. Long ago, you and your dad would spend your weekends here — walking down Congress Street, hauling the kayak out for a lazy trip down the river. It was tradition. Muscle memory brought you back, even through the ruins. Even after everything.

Your family had fled to the Boston QZ when everything fell apart. You'd grown up there, survived there — until you escaped with a ragtag group of kids barely older than you. Jackson or bust had been the dream. But truthfully, there had been no real plan. Just to keep moving and stay breathing.

One by one, you'd watched your friends fall. One by one, you'd buried them in shallow graves or simply left them behind because your plans no longer aligned with theirs. Until you were here, alone. In the place that once brought you so much happiness. Now you were standing on the bones of a city you barely remembered, trying to chase down a ghost of who you used to be all those years ago.

You crouched by the rubble of what you thought might have been your old street.

The house was long gone, buried under concrete and ash.

But if you closed your eyes... you could almost see it.

Almost, just almost, feel it.

That was your mistake.

You heard the sound but too late.

The snap of a boot against gravel.

You tried to whip around, tried to draw your pistol — but something slammed into you hard from behind.

Your knees buckled. The world tilted sideways.

You hit the ground, struggling to sit up, fighting against the darkness closing in —

And then everything went black.

—————————————-

Joel isn’t sure what drew him to trudge through the once busy city center, it only brought back bad memories of before.

Austin’s bones are all that’s left. Nothing but sun-bleached concrete, skeletal high-rises, old shops gutted and dead. He doesn’t usually come this close. Too many memories, too many ghosts. But something about today, something low in his gut, pulled him in. Maybe it was stupidity. Maybe it was penance.

Maybe, just maybe it was fate?

He keeps his rifle slung low, boots crunching over shattered glass, the occasional rustle of wind tugging at the frayed edges of old banners still clinging to the posts that line the old once busy streets. Joel’s learned to listen for the wrong kind of silence, not that peaceful kind, but the too-still, something-ain’t-right kind of silence.

That’s when he hears it, you, a wet, shallow breath. A sound not natural to the ruins around him. He freezes, body tight, hand already at his gun.

Slowly, he follows it with that noise, gun at the ready if something is wrong.

He rounds a corner near what used to be an old coffee shop, and that’s when he sees you. Crumpled near the foundation of what might’ve been a grand house once. Half-covered in dust and debris, blood is caked into your hairline, one arm twisted at an ugly angle beneath you. You’re barely breathing, your chest rising in tiny, pitiful jerks.

Raiders. Joel sighs, he knows the signs. They hadn’t even bothered to kill you, damn them… just left you to die slow, like trash.

He should walk away.

He should.

But he doesn’t. Why doesn’t he walk away?

Something about you, the way your fingers still twitch weakly, as if you’re clawing your way back to life, you want to be alive. Something keeps him rooted to the spot. He curses under his breath, checking the perimeter quickly, then crouching beside you.

“Hey,” he says, voice low but firm. “You with me?”

No response. Your face twitches slightly, but you can’t open your eyes.

Joel runs a hand down his face, grunting. He doesn’t have time for this. He’s supposed to be heading back west, supposed to be done with this goddamn city and everything it represents.

But you’re so small lying there. So broken. And something ugly stirs in his chest when he looks at you — something he can’t manage to shove down.

It ain’t pity. He’s not sure what it is.

He should walk away. He knows he should.

Instead, he crouches down beside you. His hands are rough when he touches you, checking for injuries so he can move you, but there’s a carefulness to him too, like he’s afraid you’ll slip away if he isn’t gentle.

“Goddammit,” he mutters under his breath. “What the hell am I doin’.”

Your skin’s hot to the touch, fever or infection, maybe worse. But you’re alive. Somehow you are still breathing.

Joel glances over his shoulder, scanning the ruins around him. It’s not safe here. It’s never been safe here.

Carefully, he slides his arms beneath you. You let out a broken, helpless sound, and Joel feels something twist deep in his gut — something he doesn’t want to name.

You’re not his responsibility. You’re nothing to him, noone. Just another stray the world tried to chew up and spit out.

But when he lifts you into his arms, it feels final somehow, like a line’s been crossed he can’t come back from.

He holds you tighter than he should. Like maybe if he just grips hard enough, the world can’t take you away too.

“You ain’t dyin’ out here,” he says under his breath, half a promise, half a curse. “Not on my watch.”

Joel doesn’t know why he says it. Doesn’t know why he feels it like a brand on his skin.

But he keeps walking — away from the city, away from the past — carrying you with him, feeling the weight of you settle into something heavier than he’s ready for.

Something he already knows damn well he won’t be able to walk away from.

Its sickening and heavy. But he doesn't stop.

[qin-qin16]

Chromatic Crew and Murder Time Trio Poly existing at the same time, BUT with two Killers.

The first, one of the few to survive for so long in the tar-like claws of Nightmare, was also the first to meet Murder and Horror. The relationship between them was troubled, something… mediocre – too superficial to be friends, but too deep to be just “work colleagues”. In a way, they managed to understand each other, together in some way in that deep, dark hole that was being under the rule of the Lord of Negativity.

But this Killer had met Color – they had already made promises to escape together even before Murder and Horror came into the picture. They can manage without me, Killer thought while watching Murder pretend to sleep on one of the countless nights they shared. I’ve taught them everything they needed to know, he pondered when he saw Horror hold back the bitter words he wanted to say against Nightmare, knowing that it would only end with his bones being broken.

It’s not like they would notice my absence, I can be selfish for once, was his last thought about them, before finally fleeing far from his past, to start over alongside Color (and later, the other members of the Chromatic Crew). And of course, being safe in the Omega Timeline, Nightmare couldn’t just enter there and reclaim his subordinate/slave. In fact, after thinking for a long time while venting his anger on the other residents of the abandoned castle where they lived, Nightmare realized it was only a matter of time before that Killer escaped from his grasp.

It was obvious, that thing had already met its most faithful liberator; all Nightmare had to do was get a new one and prevent this one from having the same hope as the former. It wasn’t hard to capture another stray Killer, suffering after so many resets – hungry for a moment of silence and painlessness.

Nightmare didn’t even try to hide that this Killer was a different one – it wasn’t hard for Horror and Murder to figure that out either. In a way, it was easier for this Killer (whom I will name Kei to avoid confusion) to adapt, having two other skeletons to guide him, just as the other had done with them. Kei was more curious, less cautious with his actions, almost like an animal playing with the traps set for him.

Horror and Murder, having spent more time together, had no trouble including Kei in their activities – in missions, in the few dinners they shared, in the sleepless nights when one of them remained alert, awake for any imagined intruder. The three were like wild dogs: needing sacrifices to place their trust, whether time, attention, or a vital part of their body – gnawing on each other’s bones as a way to show that they trusted one another.

It would be interesting if, after some time, the three of them planned to escape from Nightmare as well – there was nothing there holding them except themselves. Of course, they didn’t have an Omega Timeline to escape to, and no allies who would help them if they could finally hide. But perhaps living on the run was better than remaining in the clutches of that true devil.

Uhhh idk who would like to see this but i want to tag more of my mutuals so, @spuirrelwiththeletterp @t3m1 @suorgummiis (since you three seemed interested) @what-have-i-unleashed (because i used your mermaid bunny au for this) @triglycercule (no this is not my mtt poly chart) @howlsofbloodhounds (because well… Killers here)

yes i need to justify the tags

[boopshoops]

Common sense doesn't feel all that common when coming from a fella such as this.

template by ai-kan1! dividers here! sound on :)

Alias: Creek

Nickname(s): Cricket, Piranha

Gender: Xenogender

Pronouns: Any with they/it preference (they>it). Also prefers masculine language/titles (i.e. lad, mister, sir, etc.)

Sexuality: Unlabeled

Birthday: June 1 (Gemini)

Age: Somewhere close to 200, they've stopped counting

Height: 5'8 or 172cm, though the height of the doll is adjustable.

Voice Claim(s): Yuri Lowenthal, Keiichi Nanba

Twisted From: Jiminy Cricket

Unique Magic: None! It's magicless.

Job: Playful Land Owner

Hobbies: Terrarium making, architecture, entrepreneurship, bug collecting, raising bug colonies, reading, violin, creating soundscapes, fashion.

Likes: Bugs, spiders, nature, Italian roulade, their doll body, cricket song, old locomotives, leaving large impressions on others, seclusion.

Dislikes: Existentialism, extreme pessimism, extended periods of boredom, drawing in an unwanted crowd, unrewarded extended efforts.

Fears: Being completely numb, feeling nothing, being stuck in one place for too long.

Summary: The eccentric yet secluded benefactor of Playful Land, both feared and loved by many for their charities. The owner is known for exploring many different business ventures, to the point where their company is behind a startlingly large amount of big names and faces. It's been around for a suspiciously long amount of time... at least others find it suspicious, Creek's lifespan isn't that much of a secret to their close circle... that circle mostly consisting of a bunch of insects, but still.

Creek, evidently, is more so focused on doing their own thing and finding constant sources of emotion rather than living up to the standards their business has risen to. After all, once you reach the top, it has to find out just what else life has in store for them. That, and what life has in store for others. Whether that is dangerous or not is up to you, long as you stay on your toes.

Playful Land's owner is known among their hires - even in avenues outside the amusement park - as being oddly generous, if not even incredibly intelligent. Guidance is something they are almost always willing to offer, in any topic or field. Don't get it wrong, though. They're not kind or overtly rude. What you see is what you get, even if it gets you sent straight to hell. Thems the facts, lad.

CHARACTER PLAYLIST - CREATION STORY - DEATH STORY

Author's note: koisdghdosieeee theyre so sillayyy! theyre just sooo sillay guys trust me guys its just a sillay lil geek mk! wym they abandoned isola and stole whats practically her skeleton. what could u posibly mean i jhave no idea what you're talking about :) they just like little critters theyve never done anything wrong no human trafficking into labour here noooooooooooooooooooooooooo pal!!!!!! perfectly legal lived a perfectly normal amount of time totally is NOT a peepaw and has not fed ANYONE to their massive supply of crickets.

anyway ernesto/fellow bombing their giantass ship was the most entertaining thing thats happened to them in a decade <3

mr. "why are you charging those two for the destruction of the park" "i just wanted to see what would happen lol" Creek

Tag list :)

@skriblee-ksk @lowcallyfruity @justm3di0cr3 @kitwasnothere @cecilebutcher

@distant-velleity @thehollowwriter @techno-danger @scint1llat3 @the-trinket-witch

@beneathsakurashade @kathxrat-01 @qsoap @twsted-canvas @prince-kallisto

@gimmeurmoneyagh @tixdixl @sillyslipperybananapeel @twstinginthewind

[gaylordscooter]

[A pile of carefully torn-out pages sit stacked neatly inside a drawer]

entry number 1

I've lost everything. my brother, my friends, my house, my universe. all of it is just gone now

to top things off, the last thing i was doing was running away from temmie. i thought they were my friend, but after they got the six human souls somehow, they went on a rampage and started killing the remaining monsters left and right.

the only reason i escaped was because this otherworldly being dragged me through a body of water and brought me somewhere else.

this being's name is ink, they're a skeleton like me—they even look like me.

It was explained to me that my universe shattered from "too many plot holes" and i didn't know what that meant! what do you mean my world has too many "plot holes" it's not like it's a STORY.

WELL APPARENTLY IT IS A STORY. AND I DONT LIKE THINKING ABOUT THAT FOR TOO LONG.

So anyway, alternate realities are in fact real and there's a whole multiverse. Cool. Awesome. I just want to go home and for everything to go back to normal

But apparently my universe is completely gone, it doesn't exist i'm the only thing that remains from it. while there are some universes that have parallel realities mine was the only one if it's kind.

COOL. AWESOME. I'M BEING NORMAL ABOUT THIS.

IM THE ONLY THING THAT REMAINS OF MY UNIVERSE. MY UNIVERSE DOESNT EVEN EXIST ANYMORE. WHERE AM I SUPPOSED TO GO. WHAT DO I EVEN DO? THIS "INK" PERSON IS WEIRD

When I was freaking out about my universe being GONE, he gave me this notebook and pencil to "calm down"

HOW IS THIS SUPPOSED TO CALM ME DOWN?! NOW I'M VENTING TO A NOTEBOOK WHILE HE STANDS THERE WATCHING ME FURIOUSLY WRITE!

entry number 2

It's been a day since my world was destroyed, I already miss my home. I've been missing my friends and brother.

At least Ink let me stick around. I've been staying at his place along with someone else named Dream, but I have yet to meet him since he's never here. It's comfy here, at least. I even have my own room (which looks suspiciously close to my old room actually. i think ink did that on purpose, maybe to cheer me up? i don't understand him).

Right now's around the time I'd study with Undyne, actually...well. at least i don't have to worry about getting into the royal science division.

Papyrus isn't around to read this. I feel bad that I've never told him this, but

I never really wanted to join the Royal Science Division. Even though I acted like it was my dream, it wasn't. I wanted to learn more about space.

but of course that's not possible when you live in the underground. (i guess that's not really a problem anymore? this doesn't make me happy)

and we've always been low on funds. the pay for it was too good to pass up. I've stolen so much just to keep us afloat. I was good at hiding that, though.

Too good. Maybe I should've told Papyrus once he was old enough. He never knew why I was kicked out...

How would I even tell him? There's so much I haven't, because I don't know how to word it.

"By the way, brother! Mom and dad didn't exactly like me 'trying to be someone who i'm not' and disowned me like i disowned my name! That's why we grew up in a scrapyard."

[there are various scribbles and dots here]

"You didn't have to follow me, y'know. you could've lived with them instead of stubbornly staying by my side it would've been easier"

no i wouldve missed him. even if it's selfish i'm glad he tagged along. he was always there for me

i wish i could say the same. I SHOULD be able to say the same but i CANT what poor excuse of a brother am i?

maybe. no. they'll never be right.

entry number 3

I met Dream for the first time. He's really. unique. I know he's dressed like someone straight out of an anime but I didn't expect him to ACT like someone straight out of an anime!

The way he talks, the way he moves. There's something uncanny about it, honestly. He also looks on the brightside like that's the only direction he can look. When he heard my universe was destroyed? Told me at least he's glad it's led to me meeting him and Ink??

Like No Offense To You Two But I Don't Think Losing My Entire Universe Was Worth Meeting You Two.

That's not to say I'm not glad to meet them! I am glad! Just not at the expense of my home and everyone I love!

wait when have i ever watched anime? where did i even learn what that means? it was one of my friends—or acquaintances that introduced me to it, surely. Why can't I remember?

I need to ask Ink something, maybe. hopefully he'll know.

entry number 4

so a consequence of my world shattering is that it's really easy to forget about it. because it doesn't exist.

after ink told me that, i can hardly remember anything about it.

it's like there's a big gap in my memory and all i remember is that i'm forgetting something.

like my scarf. i know there's a sentimental reason i wear it. there was something about it. something about the material it's made out of i think?

Entry number five

i had a brother his name is papyrus

i had a brother his name is papyrus

his name is papyrus. he's my younger brother

don't forget him. don't mistake him for the other papyruses in the multiverse.

he woreWhat did he wear? what was he Like? oh my god what was he like

papyrus. don't forget him. he isn't like the other papyruses in the multiverse don't use them as a point of reference don't let them replace whatever memories you have left of him.

"he isn't like the other papyrus's" HOW CAN I KNOW THAT FOR SURE? I DON'T REMEMBER WHAT HE WAS LIKE

entry number 6

The more I learn about the multiverse the more my memories of my universe are skewed. Also I learned (or, heh, remembered) I have memory issues in general on Top of the whole "universe not existing means it's hard to remember" thing.

So that's great

I was being a bit of a downer because of the revelation and Ink caught on so he asked me what was up. I decided to tell him, even though I thought he wouldn't really get it since he doesn't seem to be bothered by anything ever.

Oh man was I wrong. He completely understands

He also has memory issues. He told me he was soulless—which wow, I'm surprised he felt comfortable telling me—which really messes with your capacity for remembering things.

Even though he uses paint as a substitute for a soul, it doesn't fix his memory issues. So instead he writes stuff down on his scarf. He suggested I should do something similar, write down important things.

He told me that even if I can't necessarily hold information in my head for a long time, if I can hold it in my head long enough to write it down, that's enough.

It was reassuring.

entry number 7

Dear Papyrus,

I've seen a lot of different places in the past few days, places I wouldn't ever imagine seeing. Some of them are pretty, some of them are a mess. It's a bit hard to wrap my head around it, how small we are in comparison.

I already thought space was big, learning there were multiple universes made me feel even smaller. But even so, out of everything I've seen. I have yet to find a world like ours.

But if the universe is infinite, the amount of multiverses should be too, right? Another version of our universe, one that hasn't disappeared, has to be somewhere.

I'll look for it.

I'll find it.

I don't want to pretend to be talking to you through letters. I want to see you again. There's so much I have to tell you.

All the lies I've told you. I thought I was protecting you. I was really just saving myself the trouble of explaining everything.

i miss you, bro. i'm sorry i'm the one that made it and not you

entry number 8

i lived in a house with papyrus in snowland sity. i remember it was spelled like that specifically for the sake of alliteration, even though it'd still count as alliteration if it was spelled properly anyway.

i was an intern for the royal science division, papyrus was too but he wasn't all that serious about it. i was friends with the head of it, undyne.

she was real big into gundam anime and tried making those mechs a reality. i helped her with that so i have some experience in robotics and mechanical engineering.

she was able to build at least one functional robot, their name was blookbot. they were the underground's biggest music artist. i was a pretty big fan of their music

i went to college and got a degree in psychology. i was supposed to go to medical school, but, i either failed my classes or didn't make it in i think. or maybe i couldn't afford it.

there were a few humans that lived underground, under queen toriel's care. she had a polices about not killing humans which some monsters didn't agree with, including her own (now ex) husband who thought she was prioritizing humans above her own people. technically she was prioritizing humans, in a way, since we kinda need their souls to break the barrier—but hey all those humans fell down as kids im not gonna blame her for deciding against killing. and those humans specifically weren't to blame for us being trapped underground, it was unfair to fault them for it.

there was a group of monsters that did take action against these policies. the rebels, they called themselves. it was a straightforward name. they managed to kill some of the humans that's fallen down, specifically the ones that decided to leave the safety of queen toriel in favor of finding a way out.

while the amount of monsters that were apart of the rebels was pretty low, there's always been a threat of a civil war over the queen's policies. the main thing preventing it was that everyone was very much aware that a civil war could spell the end of monsterkind. so the monsters that disagreed with her policies kinda just, went deeper into the underground and were left to their own devices.

temmie was my friend. i thought. they were...a peculiar being. not quite human or monster, they were a sentient plush toy. they were very vocal about thinking queen toriel was dumb for not just killing every human that fell underground and that if she did, we'd have enough souls to break the barrier by now. but to my knowledge the rebels only have two souls in their possession and there's five that live with queen toriel. we'd be missing one

hah! i remembered all that! fuck you, multiverse!

hopefully this information is accurate. god

entry number 9

MY NAME IS NOT BLUE. ITS SANS HOW THE HELL DID I FORGET THAT???

Ever since my universe was destroyed Ink's been calling me "blue" like that's been my name my whole life and i ended up forgetting that it's NOT!

GASLIGHTING! ME!

Only reason i remembered was because someone called me sans while we went out to a different universe to eat.OH YEAH SPEAKING OF THIS UNIVERSE

It's SIMILAR to mine, not quite the same but it feels much more familiar than the other ones have so far

they're called "Underswap" universes, because some people "swap" roles and personalities with someone else.

Ink calls my universe "Botchedswap". not that flattering of a name but i suppose it makes sense now that ive seen underswap

so like. is my universe just a "botched" version of that universe?? or variant, that's what ink calls them

variants are universes that derive similar traits to the "main" universe they're based off of. so like, botchedswap is an underswap variant since it's based on it. BUT WHO IS BASING IT ON UNDERSWAP? WHAT EXACTLY DOES THAT MEAN? IS SOMEONE WRITING THIS? IT'S A STORY. THATS WHAT INK TOLD ME

i haven't really thought about how this is all a story after ink told me. i've kinda been avoiding it. it's like my mind automatically yanking my hand away from the stove, it's hard to think about it

i guess im sorta not supposed to know about that?? i mean. this is like some horrors beyond my comprehension probably. definitely, what the fuck do i mean probably?

so if this IS a story. i'm a character in it then? I'm probably a background character aren't i? i probably hardly even show up. who's the main character? would it be ink? oh then i probably wouldn't be a background character at that point.

That's so weeeird. If i was a main character that'd mean a lot of people saw my every move! Horrible! Or i guess not, why should i care what the hypothetical audience thinks about me?

Geez, there is an audience, isn't there? Unless this story's private or something.

I'm writing something down right now and im in a story. That's pretty weird. What if I wrote a story then? That's a story in a story, would that make that story more fictional than me?

wow im a fictional character.

The dread's not really hitting. Is that because i'm unable to or because i actually don't care that much? Is the writer of the story controlling my every move. What does this say about my capacity for free will. What does this say about everyone who isn't "on-screen"?

WELL. GOING OFF THE IDEA THAT I AM NOT A MAIN CHARACTER. THAT MEANS IM NOT BEING WRITTEN ABOUT THEN. WHICH MEANS THE WORLD DOES CONTINUE ON EVEN WHEN THEY AREN'T IN THE STORY.

OK MAYBE THE DREAD IS HITTING. IS THE AUDIENCE LOOKING AT ME RIGHT NOW? CUT THAT OUT!

WOWZERS, I AM A FICTIONAL CHARACTER. ok what do i do with this information. this is weird. im not supposed to know this right? well, ink told me so i guess it's allowed???

quick write something to show i have free will. uhhh what was that saying. from uhhh that one human. rene descartes?? is that how you spell his name. there's an accent on there somewhere

cogito, ergo sum

yeaaahhh yeah. i leaned that phrase from my philosophy class. i dont fucking remember what that means, go me

entry number 10

Wowzers, it's been a second since i opened this thing up! Welp, I'm in a much better spot now. Kinda embarrassing reading back on these entries now.

These are pretty personal too. I don't really wanna continue writing entries like this, I was never big on diaries cus I hate reading back on them.

So I ripped these pages out! I can't just waste the rest of this journal, the paper's pretty good quality. plus it's a gift from ink technically

But I can't just toss these pages out so I'm putting them in my bedside drawer. I'll probably forget I did that so this is sorta like a time capsule, I suppose.

So if i have rediscovered these pages, Hi! Hello! Future, hopefully-even-more-well-adjusted-me! Probably shouldn't destroy these pages because they have important memories written down in them! Push past the cringe of seeing me in agony! Or rewrite some of the key stuff, i dunno.

If you are not Blue, Sans-from-Botchedswap The Skeleton,

FUCK OFFF!!!! BARK BARK BARK BARK!! STOP READING THISSSS IT'S EMBARRASSING COME OOON. or hi ink, i told you NOT TO SNOOP IN MY ROOM!!!

On the off-chance you are not from my plane of existence, uhhh I guess i can't stop you? And i guess i shouldn't care since i won't see your reaction nor can you tell anyone about this so. whatever. go at it, voyeur.

not the right word to use sorry. yeah no. wrong word. not what it means.

See this is why it sucks knowing there's an audience what if i say weird shit!?!? Ughhhh. probably shouldn't care about it, but alas, my feeble soul, i am sensitive that even the possibility of the hypothetical audience thinking im weird hurts me so

[devildomwriter]

Obey Me As Tumblr #25

Satan: What are some good cities?

Solomon: Owl

Satan: Too many fireflies, infested

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Mammon: Scary how fast someone can mean so much to you

Leviathan: Scary how fast you can mean nothing to someone

MC: Scary how fast I switched my car insurance to geico

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Leviathan: Dead leafs? That’s card yard salad now, and it’s the new food trend

Raphael: Leaves*

Leviathan: Where are you going?

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Mammon: I got some many love in my souls

Luke: Why do you have more than one soul?

Mammon: Irrelevant

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Diavolo: Assert your dominance by calling your friends by their student ID number

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Simeon: Homework? Decent grades? The Bible said Adam and Eve not Adam and achieve

Belphegor: I almost spit everywhere

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Leviathan: Fanfic titles be “we have not touched the stars (nor are we forgiven)” and then you look at the tags and the first one is “anal fisting”

Satan: I choked

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Mammon: I can’t believe clowns are real what the fuck…

Belphegor: DID YOU JUST DISCOVER MIRRORS?

Mammon: SHUT UP!!! SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Beelzebub: You ever get a bus driver that drives like they’re running from god

Solomon: You’re really complaining about the discount roller coaster?

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Beelzebub: Due to plaque build up, human arteries are sometimes crunchy. Also, the arteries themselves are made up of a smooth, elastic (possibly gummy?) type of tissue. Therefore I imagine that eating a diseased human artery would be a similarly experience, texture-wise, to slurping one of THESE babies

*picture of a nerds rope*

Raphael: May the only thing that dampens the flames of hell for you be God spitting in your face

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Leviathan: So, do seahorses read fpreg?

Lucifer: Seahorses are illiterate. A quality I wish I had so I didn’t have to read this post

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Mammon: Laying an egg hard and loud

Solomon: Will the person who tagged this “Stephen Colbert” please approach the bench

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Satan: Someone in my younger siblings class said they were “yandere for them” and my sibling responded “first of all cringe, second of all red flag” and no phrase has entered my daily lexicon so fast

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Mammon: I go to Home Depot

Beelzebub: I eat the tools

Satan: Stop it

Belphegor: Crumch

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Mammon: There’s no crime in being a thief

Lucifer: What a thief does is steal someone’s property without their permission, which is a crime

Asmodeus: Not when I do it. I’ll steal your heart and you wouldn’t mind

Solomon: …

Satan: That was very smooth

Leviathan: I’m gonna steal both your organs and money

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Diavolo: What do teens like?!? Is it memes? Memes about skeletons? Piss? Communism?

Solomon: This post is 20x funnier if you imagine a CEO shouting it at his board of directors

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