#tony stark guilt complex

[magnoliasandarson]

earning it

The lab was barely alive. There was no loud music, no sparks flying, and the bots had returned to their respective rooms for the night. Tony fucking despised the silence.

But he couldn't find it in himself to move from the floor.

A handmade cardstock birthday card was half crumpled in his grip. Twenty little messy names were signed below a well wish and an (objectively shitty) drawing of Iron Man. They were all children from a field trip to the MET he had saved a few months back when some disgruntled lunatic decided he was going to build a death ray.

"You're our hero!" in glittery red gel pen.

It made him physically nauseous.

He hadn't saved them. Half had received severe burns, and the other half were so severely traumatized that they would spend the next several years in therapy, at minimum. He had reached out to the parents, the hospitals, and several children's psychiatry clinics. The Maria Stark Foundation would foot the bill for any costs incurred. Tony Stark- ever tossing money at Iron Man's mistakes.

He wasn't a hero. If he had been better, if he had been faster, he could've gotten those kids out without a scratch. He could've better contained the explosions. He could've stopped whatever-the-fuck his name was before there were any explosions.

Happy Birthday!

Another year alive. What did he have to show for it? New aches, new nightmares, new guilt... His skin crawled with the desire to do something anything. He chanced a glance over at the liquor cabinet, eyes catching the empty bottles he'd poured down the drain months ago...

No. He was alive, he was a genius, he was an inventor, he was Tony Goddamn Stark, and he could would make things better. He could deserve the stupid card. His fist uncurled around the crayon drawing of Iron Man, smoothing the crumpled paper gently.

All at once, he pushed himself to his feet, staggering to one of the drafting tables, "Battle stations kids," he clapped his hands, grinning when JARVIS raised the house lights and DUM-E and U rolled back out, "it's time SI got into the skin graft game."

[whereareallthegoodnames]

Parker Guilt Complex

The MCU's Spider-Man has an insane guilt complex. "When you can do the things that I can, but you don't, and then the bad things happen, they happen because of you" is the one of the most morbid ways of saying "with great power comes great responsibility"

In Homecoming, Peter had demonstrated that he would take on more than he can even after asking for help. Tony didn't have the best level of communication with Peter.

In Infinity War, Peter sees the aliens and immediately climbs out the bus window. He manages to get himself onto the space ship and readies himself to fight against Thanos.

In Far From Home, Tony's death removes Peter's safety net. Tony, who was ready to take the blame for Spider-Man's mistakes, had died. Peter wants to be the child he is. He wants to be able to grieve the loss of his mentor. Then Nick Fury steps in and makes Peter take a more active role leading to Beck tricking Peter. By the end of the movie, Peter blames himself for putting his friends in the line of fire.

In No Way Home, Peter definitively blames himself for his friends being denied entrance to MIT. Peter takes on the task of saving the villains from other universes. Peter initially blames Goblin for May's death. By the end, Peter blames himself. He sees his friends hurt after the battle at the Statue of Liberty. He decides that they are safer without him in their lives.

[aq2003]

you can measure how likely i will be insane over a character by whether or not they can be described by the following songs:

put it on me by matt maeson

the hearse by matt maeson

dancing after death by matt maeson

[hurtspideyparker]

Tony doesn't tell the Avengers about Peter's secret identity, but Peter starts coming over constantly and chilling around the tower, helping Tony in his workshop or eating dinner with everyone.

Since Tony is weirdly secretive about who the kid is, and the fact that Spider-Man is still a small unknown (presumably adult) hero who isn't on any Avengers radars, they all collectively come to the conclusion that he's Tony's illegitimate child.

Bruce: They do have the same eyes...

Steve: This is an inappropriate conversation to have. If Tony doesn't want to tell us then we shouldn't pry

Natasha: Tony doesn't even like kids. There's no way he would tolerate one if it wasn't because of his guilt complex. I'm surprised there isn't more little Starks running around considering his previous lifestyle

Clint: *cough* drunk slut *cough*. Oh excuse my throat, I meant to say he was a drunk slut

Natasha: Steve they're the exact same. Talk too much, too fast, genius brains that go right over our heads, stubborn, like to cope with humor, same body language. They'll have the same smile lines when Peter grows into them. The only difference is that Peter was raised with manners

Steve: I'm not saying I don't agree, I'm saying it's none of our business. Anyone with basic observational skills can tell they're desperate to fill father and son roles in each others' lives, but Tony's really weird about it, so we should let him keep it private

Clint: We probably make him nervous

Bruce: Because he thinks he's a bad dad?

Natasha: I think he's kinda good at it. Which is extremely unnerving

Steve: Honestly out of all of us I had bets on Bruce having a secret wife and kids hidden somewhere. Tony stepping up to be a father was lower on my list than Nat

Natasha: You have a list?

Bruce: You think I pull?

Steve: That's irrelevant. I think it's nice that they're so close already, but we don't need to press. It might mess up a good thing

Clint: Wait can we go back to this list business. Are these like pragmatic, military leader lists, or are these for pleasure? What other kinds of lists do you have? What about which one of us is most likely to turn on you. Or what you'd turn for. Oh! What about a list of all our weak points based on accessibility and intensity, with contingency plans in case of defection or aliens or brainwashing or alien brainwashing causing defection

Steve:

Natasha:

Bruce:

Steve: This is why Tony won't share his personal life with us.

They last another week before Clint, Natasha, and Bruce team up to steal a strand of Peter's hair and test it for paternity. Steve knows something is up, and follows Clint to Bruce's lab.

Steve: What are you doing...

Natasha: Admit it, you know exactly what we're doing and you want to see the results

Steve: I... well if you already have them there's no point keeping it from me

Clint: Tony Stark is not the daddy!

Tony: Which of my exes have you been talking to?

Clint: AH oh hey Tony didn't see you there

Steve: I'm not apart of this

Tony: Is this about Peter? He told me something plucked his head when he was walking down here. Which of you murder twins was hiding in the rafters

Natasha: Y'know he's not your kid, whoever told you he was lied to you and I hope you get your child support back

Tony: My kid? He's my intern. What funky kool-aid have you all been drinking, that boy is sorting my tool drawer right now. He has slightly better dexterity than Dum-E, it's been quite helpful

Bruce: You have really poor professional boundaries if he's just an intern

Tony: Okay fine. He's actually Spider-Man. I didn't wanna tell anyone cause the Accords were still fishy, but everything should be good now. Anyways, he really wants to train with you guys so you'd have to know eventually

Clint: Who the hell is Spider-Man?

Steve: That guy in Queens who helps bring in peoples' groceries?

Tony: Well, yeah—listen, he's like 14 and he just got his powers. I'm not exactly sending him to fight armed terrorists yet. He'll grow into it, but trust me, there's potential. I'm kind of like his mentor

Steve: You really don't need to do that

Bruce: Yeah we'll all help out from now on

Natasha: Don't take too much responsibility for the boy

Clint: Oh god what have you been teaching him?

Tony: Thanks for the vote of confidence guys. Whatever, now that you all know he'll be hounding you all day for advice anyways. Good luck with that. Friday tell Pete to come down here, the Avengers are gonna train with him

Tony leaves them all, snickering to himself as loud footsteps come crashing down the hallway. If they didn't know any better they'd say several elephants were tripping down the stairs. Then, the doors burst open, Peter's mouth already running a mile-a-minute.

Peter: Really, you guys know, you guys will teach me? Can I use the shield, Ms. Romanoff can you show me how to kick, show me with Mr. Barton, or, or Mr. Rogers. I can take down someone bigger than me, I'm actually really strong. Wanna see? Why are we in Bruce's lab, is that my first lesson! Can I touch this? What are you making here, how long has this been distilling, what about my webs, have you ever seen my webs? I did them myself, but I bet we could make them even better, watch out it's really sticky—

Steve ends up with webs all over his face, several of Bruce's beakers broken from the white spray, one reacting poorly with it and exploding all over Clint and Natasha. Bruce immediately shoves them into the decontamination shower, leaving them as two drenched rats wearing skin-tight combat gear. Natasha is already fuming at the thought of trying to peel it off.

Peter: I'm really sorry, I didn't know it was on ricochet... the splitter webs were just 'cause I panicked

Steve: This is why I told you all to leave it be.

"Noted," they all say in unison.

[stuckysimp]

I'm like 8 years too late, but oh well - I've had this Captain America Civil War rant stuck in my head for a while and I need to get it out after re-watching it. (This is gonna be long af, but bear with me).

I feel like a lot of people missed the actual point and plot of the movie (and the marketing definitely didn't help). The whole "team cap vs team iron man" stuff becomes irrelevant after like the first 20 minutes of the movie. But of course, it's still quite a big part of the movie and I'd like to take a moment to explore what I think, the different character motivations are around why they signed or didn't (or would / wouldn't).

The only reason Tony "I successfully privatised world peace" Stark signed the accords in the first place anyway is because of his massive survivors guilt complex which we see triggered by the woman who approaches him at the end of his speech to the MIT students. Like this man does not give a single shit about the government, and much like Steve Rogers, he just wants to keep people safe. Unlike Steve, however, he doesn't trust himself to do so and thinks of himself needing the be kept in check, for someone else to take the blame (though he'd probably internalise it anyway, let's be real).

Rhodey has always kind of been more on the side of the government, even if that meant going against Tony - think Iron Patriot - so it makes sense that he'd want to sign. He understands that a group as powerful and dangerous as the Avengers needs to be kept in check, but what he doesn't understand are the risks around that. In a perfect world, it would be fine, but unfortunately government systems are stupid and corrupt.

Peter was only really in the fight in the first place because he was a child blindly following this big celebrity guy he idolised. He didn't know enough about the situation to properly analyse it, just being fed and believing whatever Tony told him (and he had no reason to go against him, so why would he? This was his shot, he's been chosen by THE Tony Stark to help). "Mr Stark said you'd say that" "he said you're wrong, you think you're right, that makes you dangerous." I 100% believe that if Peter had read the accords, that he would have been on Steve's side anyway.

Vision is an embodiment of 'good' and 'peace' - essentially everything that Ultron was supposed to be, but wasn't. He has no reason to be against the accords if it will keep people safe and he makes the point during their conversation of "our very strength invites challenge. Challenge incites conflict. And conflict ... breeds catastrophe. Oversight ... oversight is not an idea that can be dismissed out of hand." It's also very much the beginning kind of puppy love between him and Wanda in this movie, meaning that he will want to protect her. No matter what. Even if it means "locking her in her room."

Nat was seriously one of the only people in this movie with a brain cell lol. I firmly believe that if the accords had been properly put in place, she would have followed them until she no longer thought the government's instructions were 'right' and would have gone against them anyway. Her main goal in this movie was trying to keep the Avengers, her family, together and ultimately do the 'right' thing.

T'challa didn't give one shit about the accords lmao, he's damn king. No, he was only there in the first place to take revenge on his father's death (which at the point of the airport fight scene he still thought it was Bucky's fault. He later discovers, after following Steve and Bucky to Siberia, that it's Zemo's, and locks him up).

Steve's concerns with the accords are valid, and honestly I wouldn't have signed them either. To be told "sign, retire, or get locked up" isn't really a big winner for me lol. And the thing is, Steve's done this. He fought in WW2, he got paraded around like some big hero while men died, and he did nothing. It wasn't until he went against orders, that he actually did something helpful (saved the captured 107th division in Azzano). So, no, he's not going to be side-lined when people out there need help. That's just not who he is.

Bucky had no part in the accords, and as soon as he got introduced into the movie, that plot point became irrelevant. He was framed by Zemo, and then used to rip the avengers apart. The accords was just another log to add to the fire at that point. He followed Steve because "till the end of the line" and all that. He literally, heartbreakingly, says "I don't know if I'm worth all this," but he follows anyway.

Scott, much like Peter, is kinda just happy to be there. He's following CAPTAIN FREAKING AMERICA into battle without hesitation. But like, let's be honest, given his whole movie and character, I very much doubt Scott would be on Tony's side if he had read the accords.

Clint got dragged out of freaking retirement for this shit, and he didn't actually get involved until after Team Cap already knew about Zemo. That's why he's there. Not because of the accords, but to help Steve get to the Quinjet to get to Siberia and stop Zemo before he can go through with his assumed plan to wake up the five super soldiers who'd been stashed there. (Of course, this isn't actually Zemo's plan, but we'll get back to that later).

Wanda is going through some serious self loathing during this movie, and the incident in Lagos doesn't help. Like at all. Ma girl just wants to live her life and be left alone at this point and she's getting all of these horrible things thrown into her face by Secretary Ross. She doesn't want to be controlled, she doesn't want to be a weapon, she wants to be free. "You locked me in my room." - Girl already probably hates Tony Stark due to her family being killed by one of his bombs and Ultron, so she's mad anyway.

Sam is on Steve's side from the start. With the accords, to fight Zemo, all of it. During the 'discussion' between him and Rhodey, he says "So let's say we agree to this thing. How long is it gonna be before they LoJack us like a bunch of common criminals?" He doesn't trust Secretary Ross, and is clearly hesitant to add his signature to the accords. (not that I blame him).

The main actual villain and 'plot' of the movie after the first part with the accords, was the whole thing with Zemo wanting to tear the Avengers apart to get revenge for his family dying in Sokovia. He takes advantage of the accords, and of Bucky / The Winter Soldier to do this but it's not really discussed which annoys me. It's a MAJOR part of the film, yet all I ever really see being discussed are the accords affecting the decisions of characters throughout the film with no consideration of the wider picture.

From when the UN meeting is blown up, the Avengers are being manipulated by Zemo working in the background throughout the film. He frames Bucky for murder, and Steve - who has been looking for Bucky for the past 2 years - goes after him like ‘tf man’. Bucky gets taken in and Zemo uses the opportunity to activate the Winter Soldier programming, learn about Hydra’s super soldier program, and of course - “Mission report. December 16, 1991.”

This leads to Bucky’s escape and attack, Steve and co going on the run, and eventually the airport fight. The meaning of this scene gets lost, I feel, when people relate it back to the accords because it’s not about that anymore. Not really, not for anyone. Especially not for Steve, or even for Tony.

Tony at this point, most definitely feels like his world is being torn apart. He’s losing control, he’s spiralling, and Steve just isn’t listening. He’s blinded by his anger to the bigger picture and he just wants to get a handle on the situation to deal with it further.

Steve’s forgotten all about the accords, his priority is keeping Bucky safe and stopping Zemo. He tries to tell Tony, tries to talk to him, but Tony isn’t listening either. I mean their whole interaction just before the fight shows this:

(the dialogue below has been condensed to show the key lines - basically I got rid of other characters talking irrelevantly)

-

Steve Rogers: Hear me out, Tony. That doctor, the psychiatrist, he's behind all of this.

Tony Stark: Anyway, Ross gave me 36 hours to bring you in. That was 24 hours ago. Can you help a brother out?

Steve Rogers: You're after the wrong guy.

Tony Stark: Your judgment is askew. Your old war buddy killed innocent people yesterday.

Steve Rogers: And there are five more super soldiers just like him. I can't let the doctor find them first, Tony. I can't.

- later -

Tony Stark: And you've been a complete idiot. Dragging in Clint. 'Rescuing' Wanda from a place she doesn't even want to leave, a safe place. I'm trying to keep . . . I'm trying to keep you from tearing the Avengers apart.

Steve Rogers: You did that when you signed.

Tony Stark: Alright, We're done. You're gonna turn Barnes over, you're gonna come with us. NOW! Because it's us! Or a squad of J-SOC guys . . . with no compunction about being impolite. [Steve looks aside.] Come on.

-

Not to mention that Tony, after learning that Zemo impersonated and killed the actual doctor dude that was supposed to see Bucky whilst he was in confinement, he DISOBEYED the accords and Secretary Ross to go and help Steve stop what they thought at the time was the reactivation of the five super soldiers who'd been left in cryo freeze.

He follows Steve and Bucky to Siberia to help them, not to fight them. That only changes because of Zemo showing the footage of Bucky, WHILE UNDER BASICALLY MIND CONTROL, killing Tony’s parents.

In this scene, Tony 100% has every right to be angry. Unfortunately, he’s the kind of person who cannot see past his anger. He gets in his head, he spirals, and he tries to kill Bucky based on blind rage. (IT WASN’T BUCKY’S FAULT DAMMIT).

And yes, Steve was 100% in the wrong for not telling Tony. This whole scene could have been very easily avoided if Steve had just pulled Tony aside and had the difficult conversation about his parents death. Tony deserved to know, and Steve was only sparing himself pain by doing it. Dick move Steve, 0/10.

The fight between the three allows Zemo, having successfully completed his plan of eliminating the super soldiers and tearing the avengers apart, to slip away. With his work done, he tries to end his own life, but T’challa stops him and arrests him instead.

Steve and Tony’s fight was unnecessary, dramatic, and heart-breaking, and I’m very glad they managed to make up later, but ye. I think, at the end of the day, they’re all just dramatic idiots with communication issues lol.

-

Thank you for reading my long ass essay lmao, apparently I have a lot of feelings about this movie 😂

[idk-bruh-20]

Irondad fic ideas #139

NWH AU where Tony's been in a coma this whole time. He still is. But the world thinks he's dead.

One day, Rhodey is in some science place (maybe SI, maybe a community college where he was giving a speech?) and he sees this kid tinkering who looks exactly like Tony Stark. The teen Tony Stark from when he first met him at MIT. Even down to the mannerisms. He goes up and has a brief conversation with this stranger, just curious. Then he leaves.

Unbeknownst to the kid, Peter, Rhodey managed to grab something for a DNA test. The kid just looked too much like his best friend. Like seeing a ghost

When they analyze the DNA, they learn that this kid is in fact Tony's biological son

Rhodey goes back to find the kid, this time bringing Happy. Peter gets to have the super fun conversation where two people who should know him but don't tell him that the person he saw as a father was his actual father, only it's too late

They convince Peter to come with them eventually. And Peter gets the shock of his entire life

Over the next little while, at Tony's bedside, Peter gets to know Morgan (who he would've seen as a sister anyway but this is insane). He also gets reacquainted with Rhodey, Happy, and Pepper, who all admittedly find him a bit sus with how much he seems to know.

But...this is Tony's kid. His son. So they let him be there, let him talk to Tony and hold his hand. 

Finally, finally, Tony wakes up.

And it turns out, being in a coma and thought dead by the entire world, including wizards, makes one exempt from certain magic

Bonus:

As he sits by Tony's bedside, Peter has to grapple with a lot of emotions. One of them is the realization that he was never actually related to Uncle Ben, which makes him feel like his uncle and aunt died for nothing

Pepper helps him through it. Even not knowing him the way she once did, she knows plenty about guilt complexes and chosen family. She assures Peter that he's still a Parker, no matter what, and that his aunt and uncle wouldn't have given him up for the world

Another thing Peter deals with is the fear of Tony waking up and not knowing him. It breaks his heart just thinking about it.

Cue THE most relieving hurt/comfort reunion ever imagined

[queenpiranhadon]

A/N: You all voted on this poll, so I shall deliver. ;) Here's my masterlist!

Warning(s): Angst, unrequited love (kinda), amnesia, past (?) relationship, lovers to strangers to lovers, depictions of murder and bombing (nothing really happens though), mentions of depression

Pairing(s): Bucky Barnes x GN!Reader

•────•°•❀•°•──── ꜱᴡᴇᴇᴛ ᴀɴɢᴇʟ ────•°•☁︎•°•────•

"Hey."

It was dark. Too dark for your comfort, but you still found solace out in the inky blackness that shrouded you, finding some twisted reassurance in the way all you could see was your own two hands in front of you, the faulty light that illuminated the looming Avengers complex in the distance, and the railing you rested your forearms on. 

And now, you saw the glint of metal in your periphery- no, not metal, vibranium.  

“Hi.” is all you whisper back, refusing to make eye contact with the man beside you.  

Your heart throbs, a dull ache compared to the raging thoughts in your head, the reason you came out in the dead of night in the first place. Bucky Barnes, your first love, and perhaps your last. You vowed you’d never see him again, yet here he was.

"Why are you avoiding me?" he grunts, giving up on trying to make eye contact with you and opts for leaning on the railing next to you.  

Bucky had been away on a mission, before he was the Winter Soldier, before he was the White Wolf, back when he was just Bucky. And that Bucky had been your friend. After he had left Hydra, he met you, on the street, making your way to a family-owned cafe, picking up coffee for both you and your boss, and a donut for yourself. At the time, you were a senior in college, working an internship under Tony Stark. You were special- special enough to stay after Stark debuted as Iron Man to the world, working under him – researching biotech and adding updates to his suit when the situation required them.  

Bucky had been there, in an alleyway, looking broken as he stared at the wall across from him. And you, the sweet angel you were, abandoned your coffee and asked him if he had a place to stay. 

It wasn’t like you to pick up every homeless man you saw on the streets, your small apartment would be ransacked if you had- but something was different about Bucky. Something special. So you took him in, making sure he ate, bathed, and had a place to sleep. 

And after a few months, Bucky became more than a friend. You had grown on him, cracking through his walls, and providing the warmth he needed for his cold heart. But the effort it took you to get there was painstakingly slow, the man had refused to eat your food until you threatened you wouldn’t either until he had done so. It was toxic, sure, using guilt to get him to do what you needed, but it had worked. And you two had been happy.  

You never told anyone about your new boyfriend, the man living in your house- knowing that judgement you would face had someone known that you started dating a random man you found off the street. But you loved him, with your whole heart, and nothing could change that.  

And then one day, he disappeared. You looked everywhere for him, showing up to the police with his picture, sobbing, wondering if he could be dead- or worse. 

And then you saw him, six months later, not in person, but on TV. For killing man by the name of T’Chaka, and for bombing a building. 

You weren’t the same after that, an empty shell filled with lies and denial, telling yourself that your Bucky wouldn’t do that. The same rough hands you loved so much, the ones that caressed your skin as you went to bed every night, enveloped in each other’s warmth, couldn’t be the same hands splattered with blood, the ones that held the lives of so many people. 

Tony had graciously let you off work, noticing the state you were in, but decided not to press as the cause of your misery.

And then a civil war broke out through the Avengers, and Tony needed your help. So you obliged, creating tech that would assist him in the fights he had coming. But you weren’t prepared for what was to come after all that. 

You had encountered Bucky at a party, alive and well, one hosted at Tony’s home. And you approached him.  

“Bucky! Oh my god, I’m so happy you’re safe.” you had said, wrapping your arms around him, trying to feel the warmth you used to, yet it wasn’t the same. You sobbed, spilling your worries out onto him, asking him why he didn’t talk to you, why he didn’t come back. 

And after everything, all he had said was "I'm sorry, who are you?"

He had forgot. 

Your heart had split into a million pieces then, the fragile glue you had used to try to keep your sanity together shattering as you whispered a feeble “never mind” before retracting away from him and slipping into the crowd. 

You avoided him for weeks after that, shooting down any attempt of communication between you, your heart clenching painfully whenever you glimpsed him.  

And now it was just the two of you, outside, on a railing.  

“Because it hurts” is all you say, in response to his question, deciding to focus on the present, not the past. 

He frowned slightly, a crease forming through his eyebrows, your fingers twitching to smooth it, as you always had. But you didn’t. He said nothing though, waiting for you to continue.  

“You really don’t remember, huh?” you whisper softly, a small huff exiting your lips, a hollow sound. 

He shakes his head again, swallowing thickly. “Most of my memories have been coming back- except for this one.” 

A choked sob leaves your mouth, playing off as a laugh as you feel the tears building in your throat. 

“I never meant anything to you, did I?” the words leave your mouth without much thought, before you shake your head smiling sadly.  

“It doesn’t matter any ways, I know it’s not your fault.” you say, turning away from him, walking back to the Avengers complex. “Be happy Buck – that's all I need from you.”  

Bucky stares at your retreating form, silent, wanting to reach out for you, reach out for the memories of you, but they were still so far away, out of reach.  

If only you knew how much he wanted to see his sweet angel again. 

[moritashie]

I'VE GOT AN evil FIC IDEA vol #13

After Peter's death, someone else with his face starts appearing in New York. That person, who knows he's not Peter, slowly starts to remember things from Peter's life, dreads that life, the family from memories, and grieves over something he never had.

Aka. Peter Parker dies, a clone of his is created. Upon escaping his captors, the clone learns of his origins, and in true Peter-like fashion (Lets suspend our beliefs for a moment, yes, they are also the same or very similar on the psychological level) he has a severe guilt complex over his very existence.

Enter Tony Stark into the equation.

[kandisheek]

FIC REC WEEK 22 – MCU

A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to Oblivion by sabrecmc

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: M Words: 66,612 Tags: Getting Together, Memory Loss, Identity Porn

Summary: “Mr….Mr. Stark?” the man asked, shaking his head as if to clear it, grip convulsing spasmodically on Tony’s hand. “That’s me,” Tony responded gruffly. Of course the man recognized him. His face had been everywhere before the whole Iron Man thing and now…well, now…so yeah, totally understandable. Guy was probably thinking of his lawyer’s speed dial number. “Look, ambulance is on its way, okay, so just sit tight. You’re going to be fine.” “I—I think I missed my date,” the blond man said. And promptly passed out. Or, how Tony accidentally kidnapped Captain America and then wanted to keep him.

Reasons why I love it: It's really cool how Steve's amnesia acts as a reason for why the world seems all wrong to him in the future. Like even within canon, it would make complete sense for things to play out like this. And Tony's guilt complex – and instant attraction to Steve – making him accidentally play keep-away with SHIELD is also great storytelling. I love the whole set-up here, and of course, in true sabre fashion, the writing is absolutely excellent. Check this one out if you haven't, I'm sure you'll love it just as much as I do!

[nourrris]

I hate, and love Steve Rogers.

there is no character who's given me as many conflicted feelings as he does, i can't tell if i absolutely hate his guts or adore him helplessly, one side is coming from the fact i love tony stark, and steve rogers is an absolute cunt for the way he's treated him at times (which some instances are understandable, but i still hold civil war against him) and then theres the version of him that i hold so close to my heart, excluding his confident demeanor and severe savior (guilt?) complex, he is still the man who couldnt help himself and risk his life for everybody else, the man who was pushed into a situation so life changing, experiencing the quite literal horrors of the world and humanity, both pre and post serum, he lived a rough life, especially with the timeline he lived in originally, and then the entire ordeal with bucky, the horrifying realization what's happened to one of the closest people in his life, what he's become, and the fact he's alive. (not that he ever got the chance to mourn anyways)

and thats not to talk about how his life was ultimately changed completely within such a small time frame for him, prior the modern years, living through a whole different world, about to sacrifice his life to mankind, then he wakes up 70 years later, the love of his life has aged in a way he didn't get the chance too, the world has became something completely separate to the timeline he lived in, he has to learn new social customs, new ways to adapt to how society exists, how is he meant to grieve or mourn through any of this at all? he had absolutely no time, he was consistently put into the highest of stress situations.

i hate how civil war went down, he gave away his life he had began building, of course there were multiple different ways to act and he definitely did not choose the right one, but i'll give the smallest inch of credit and say i'm not sure how i'd act either if i found my best friend (who was supposedly dead, now a deadly assassin) was back in the limelight for the worst reason possible, one that was causing the entire world to hate him, but not only that - his identity of actually still being alive is now public for the entire world to see, even if the man they saw hadn't actually been him.

i can't say i would have taken his side as confidently so brashly, almost killing a person you could almost consider a close friend in defense when they just found your supposedly dead (now assassin) bestfriend is at fault for who killed his parents, tony acting irrationally was rather reasonable, i'd understand bucky defending himself, steve through? i'd say its different, maybe?

he's also rather arrogant in same situations, especially in 'the avengers' when he says 'Big man in a suit of armor, take that away and what are you?' as if tony wasn't the genius behind making every little detail in the suit, constructing it all single handedly, and the prototype that had been created in a very spontaneous manner which still worked miraculously better than any person managed to create in a much larger time frame, and a much less stressful situation.

i cant pretend and believe that steve must know this information of course, they seemed like they had been roughly introduced to eachother, but also to make such a claim against somebody like him who's father was also an insanely credible genius, he should have given him at least some benefit of the doubt, or actually attempted to learn more about him before going straight for eachothers throats like a bunch of kids.

another part of that quote that irked me was the sacrifice one, i frankly do not understand that part, the entire idea of iron-man is one big ol' self sacrifice, there is no safe (or really sane) way to make a machine like that and go into conflict way too big for one person to overtake, he's almost died multiple times for the sake of helping society, the idea of getting his information right isn't even the biggest issue, its that i just genuinely dont understand why he keeps spouting out things with absolutely no context? he says he see's the videos, but its a little hypocritical steve rogers of all people is letting other people define who tony stark is when he lived his entire life being defined what society deems of him just by a single glance, unless of course he just saw one random iron-man video of the stark expo performance with the girls. (which god, i cringed at myself.. why tony, why)

still to act as confident as he did, i would have assumed he attempted to well.. learn more about the guy. i genuinely think this part itself is a poor writing issue though, it felt weirdly out of character, but i can understand it from a certain viewpoint i guess.

once more, another point i wanted to make this time was somewhat against tony's actual response to what steve said, of course in a way hes completely correct where "everything about him came out of a bottle", in a physical sense, but steves over eager need to help was always very evident, his courage in place since the dawn of the world. although, he realistically would likely have never been able to become the man he is without the serum, so well technically theres not much to fight back there, but the serum could have distinctively (and quite literally has) gone to the wrong hands, i'm not sure if i should be applauding him for having morals, but at last, its difficult to say how anybody would react to such a life altering experience, and not really even getting the chance to understand whats happening, or how it works.

i've likely gotten off track, but point is i think he's a very flawed character, but at the same time still one of the kindest people with a heart made out of gold, albeit a bit of a blockhead at times, he truly tries, and he was frankly put in a very unfair position, no matter what he signed up for, there was no world it could have possibly entailed what he's gone through so far, even if he doesn't regret it, or would do it a hundred times more.

anyways, i hate him and love him all the same, and still very strongly hate his ending in endgame (as a total writing issue, i cannot possibly blame the character).

thank you for reading this ramble, so sorry if this upset you, or if i actually got any of the lore wrong, do correct me if i have!

[missacidburn928]

No Wonder (Part I)

No Wonder

Avengers AU. Steve Rogers x Mutant!Reader “Serenity”. Tony Stark x Mutant!Reader “Serenity”. Bucky Barnes x Mutant!Reader “Serenity”.

Wordcount: 2487

Summary:

You're in a situationship with Tony, Steve and Bucky. Things become too much when Tony finds out about Bucky's involvement with his parents death. Sending your world into chaos.The world is on fire, I'm so fucking tired And equally wired, so Am I to blame for my sick, frantic brain?

Warnings: 18+ Only MDNI

Angst and Feels, Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Smut

Notes:

Hello Heathens, I was originally going to post this as a single part, but the flow just was not working. So I have decided to make it two parts and post what is already set. I am hoping this will reinvigorate my muse to finish this story out the way I have envisioned it. I am really happy with this part and I hope you enjoy it as well. Quick not about the reader(you) just for context: This a Found Family story. Reader is mutant and a former addict. She Used to use to help suppress her empathic powers, turning her emotions into forms of the elements. She was found by Clint and Nat and they are very protective. Happy Reading 🖤 *Heavily inspired by the song Antsy by UPSAHL

Banner @cafekitsune Divider @firefly-graphics

No one on the compound is unaware of the situationships I’m entangled in. I didn’t ask for this, but I’m not denying any of them either. Steve and Tony need me to feed something missing inside of them and I’m weak to deny them that.   

Steve, ever the fixer, feels drawn to the broken parts of me. Wanting to be the one to hold me and piece me back together.   

Tony connects with my destructive parts. No stranger to that darkness himself. I became his own personal addiction. Seeking out my body for the dopamine rush of pulling orgasms out of me.   

Then there’s Bucky. Full of such rage and sadness my powers are intrinsically drawn to him. He may look stoic on the surface but he’s an array of emotions on the inside. I can’t explain why it feels as if we were made for each other. But I’ve learned not to go against my instincts.   

I know he feels undeserving of me. Even though he keeps me close. Especially at night when the nightmares and flash backs are the worst.

I take the pain away.   

We work it all out in the training room. Then end the night tangled in the sheets, surrounded by wildflowers. Proof of our time spent together.  

I’m afraid to acknowledge what I know deep down in the core of me. I’m in love with him. My feelings for Steve and Tony are nowhere near as complex. I know I’m more of a place holder in their lives than they seem to realize. I knew from the start that love was not on the table for me. Most certainly not with them. This love for Bucky threw me for a godamn loop.  

Then Bucky’s past under Hydra’s control comes back to bite him in the ass and sends my world into chaos. The anger and guilt floating around was enough to suffocate me. My body stuck in a cycle of fire and ice. I couldn’t take it anymore. So, I did what I do best.  

I ran.   

I got the hell out of that compound and went to the one place I knew I could deal with all of this safely. 

Continue: ao3 tumblr

[missacidburn928s-heathenhideaway]

No Wonder (Part I)

No Wonder

Avengers AU. Steve Rogers x Mutant!Reader “Serenity”. Tony Stark x Mutant!Reader “Serenity”. Bucky Barnes x Mutant!Reader “Serenity”.

Wordcount: 2487

Summary:

You're in a situationship with Tony, Steve and Bucky. Things become too much when Tony finds out about Bucky's involvement with his parents death. Sending your world into chaos. The world is on fire, I'm so fucking tired And equally wired, so Am I to blame for my sick, frantic brain?

Warnings: 18+ Only MDNI

Angst and Feels, Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Smut

Notes:

Hello Heathens, I was originally going to post this as a single part, but the flow just was not working. So I have decided to make it two parts and post what is already set. I am hoping this will reinvigorate my muse to finish this story out the way I have envisioned it. I am really happy with this part and I hope you enjoy it as well. Quick not about the reader(you) just for context: This a Found Family story. Reader is mutant and a former addict. She Used to use to help suppress her empathic powers, turning her emotions into forms of the elements. She was found by Clint and Nat and they are very protective. Happy Reading 🖤 *Heavily inspired by the song Antsy by UPSAHL

Banner @cafekitsune Divider @firefly-graphics

No one on the compound is unaware of the situationships I’m entangled in. I didn’t ask for this, but I’m not denying any of them either. Steve and Tony need me to feed something missing inside of them and I’m weak to deny them that.   

Steve, ever the fixer, feels drawn to the broken parts of me. Wanting to be the one to hold me and piece me back together.   

Tony connects with my destructive parts. No stranger to that darkness himself. I became his own personal addiction. Seeking out my body for the dopamine rush of pulling orgasms out of me.   

Then there’s Bucky. Full of such rage and sadness my powers are intrinsically drawn to him. He may look stoic on the surface but he’s an array of emotions on the inside. I can’t explain why it feels as if we were made for each other. But I’ve learned not to go against my instincts.   

I know he feels undeserving of me. Even though he keeps me close. Especially at night when the nightmares and flash backs are the worst.

I take the pain away.   

We work it all out in the training room. Then end the night tangled in the sheets, surrounded by wildflowers. Proof of our time spent together.  

I’m afraid to acknowledge what I know deep down in the core of me. I’m in love with him. My feelings for Steve and Tony are nowhere near as complex. I know I’m more of a place holder in their lives than they seem to realize. I knew from the start that love was not on the table for me. Most certainly not with them. This love for Bucky threw me for a godamn loop.  

Then Bucky’s past under Hydra’s control comes back to bite him in the ass and sends my world into chaos. The anger and guilt floating around was enough to suffocate me. My body stuck in a cycle of fire and ice. I couldn’t take it anymore. So, I did what I do best.  

I ran.   

I got the hell out of that compound and went to the one place I knew I could deal with all of this safely. 

Clint’s farm is my sanctuary. With open spaces and a small little cottage built a safe distance from the world just for me. No need to call ahead. I let them know I’m there by lighting the largest fire in my fireplace that I can. The smoke from the chimney signaling my arrival. Laura will show up eventually with a meal and ear to listen to my bullshit. But before I can let my guard down I need to reach out to Dr. Cho and see if she can prescribe me something to help deal with all these emotions. A relapse feels imminent if I’m left to my own devices.  

They way Tony was spitting so much vitriol to Bucky and Steve was just too much to bear. I felt like I was going to combust before suddenly feeling like I was plunged into the artic waters of Antarctica when the feeling of shame and guilt overwhelmed me. The drastic change of hot to cold over and over was a torture I never experienced before.   

I vaguely remember shouting as I grasped my stomach in pain. “FUCK! At least wait until I’m out of the room before you rip further into each other! My body can only take so much!”   

I didn’t wait for a response. My pain barely registered to Steve and Tony. Both too self-absorbed in their convictions, to care what this was doing to me. But Bucky turned to me with sadness and an apology in his eyes as he watched me slowly make my way out of the room.   

I don’t blame him for what went down. I don’t even blame Tony or Steve. Emotions are a wild beast and even the calmest individual can fall prey to their whims. I can wield them to my will and yet I can still fall victim to their toxic ways. That’s why I prefer to be numb. If I can’t feel. Then nothing can hurt me.   

Tony is the first to reach out. Hacking into my phone to unblock himself so that he could text me.  

T: I understand things got out of control. But you of all people understand the grip anger can have on you. Steve and Bucky have left. Come back home. It feels empty around here without your sunlight and flowers decorating the halls. We can lose ourselves in each other. I’ll even do that thing you like with my tongue that makes daisies sprout in your hair.   S: I’m perfectly content and safe where I am. I need to recover from the damage done to my body and soul. This wasn’t just some regular fight Tony. That shit was toxic on so many levels. How could I return and go back to being your little emotional sex doll, when my physical pain didn’t even register to you as you spit your hate at them. I’m sorry T, but I’m not coming home. Not until all this shit is resolved.    T: Babygirl, don’t do this to me. I need you. Come home.  

Having already said all that I needed to say, I didn’t respond. Instead I just turned my phone off and tossed it in a drawer. I wasn’t in the mood to play emotional phone tag with someone who clearly only sees me as a body to ease their troubles in.  

Damn therapy giving me self-respect at a time like this. Or is it just the influence of having Bucky in my life as of late? A man who feels so undeserving of the things I give him.   

“ Doll, you don’t have to sleep in here every night. You have others who want you in theirs. It’s okay. I’ve dealt with them for years. I can handle them.”  

“But you don’t have to anymore. And honestly, your bed is so much comfier than mine. And don’t get me started on that rock of a mattress that Steve sleeps on. And Tony never stays in bed long enough to actually sleep. He gets more sleep with his head resting on his lab desk than his California King. I am happy right where I am. Stop trying to send me away.”  

Steve and Bucky show up on my doorstep a few days later. Steve is upset that I chose to leave the way I did and that I asked Cho for drugs to numb myself. Thanks Nat.    

“You’ve come so far. How could you so easily want to fall back into that darkness?”  

“Easy Steve. I was tired of feeling. Not to mention the physical beating those emotions were taking on my body. If you have a better way to deal with it, please let me know. But that would be hard to do, seeing as how you are one of the main causes of that pain. How long did it take for you to realize I was gone? Before you left the compound? Or after everything settled and you needed something else to focus on?”  

“That’s not fair Serenity. I was taking care of my best friend. He needed me.”  

“And I didn’t?” I sneer.

“It’s not like that. Please, come on. You know I love you. I’ve told you this before. I wouldn’t abandon you like that.”  

“And yet, you did. It didn’t even take Tony 24 hours to reach out and ask me to come home. So he can ‘lose himself’ in me and begin to heal. I refused to of course. Not until all this toxicity is dealt with. It’s been almost a week since the incident, and you finally showed up. Good for you Steven.”  

“We were trying to figure out where it was safe to go for Bucky. Traveling under the radar is not easy. We got here as soon we could.”  

“I call bullshit. And here’s why. If you cared to listen to me speak about things other than my dark past you would know that I have a place here on Clint’s farm. That it is my safe haven and where I go when I need a reset. You would also know that this place is safe for any of us. It would have been your first stop. But it wasn’t. So who told you I was here. Nat? Sam?”  

“Me.” Bucky deadpans. “I told him we could find you here. Just as you said. I knew you would be here. We took a week because I was waiting for his emotions to even out before we put you through any more pain. I never want to see you go through what you did that day ever again.”  

“Bucky, I…” I can feel my body responding to his honesty. “I’m at a loss for words other than thank you.”   

“Your eyes.” Bucky points out.  

“What about them?”  

“They’re amber. Almost glowing like the flames of a campfire. They’ve never done that before. Are you angry?”  

“N-No. I’m definitely feeling something. But it’s not anger.”  

“Than what could it be?”  

“Love.” Steve pipes in. “She’s in love with you Buck. Love is as fiery as anger but it’s more subtle. Hence the changing of her eyes instead of flames along her fingertips.”  

“Huh. That’s a new one.” I surmise.  

“Y-you love me?” Bucky whispers.  

I fidget with my hands. “Yeah. I think I have for a while now but was just too scared to address it. Didn’t want to overwhelm you. I know you think you don’t deserve love because I feel the same way. But I do. I love you.”  

“Fuck. I thought it was just me.”  

“Wait, what?”  

“I’ve been love with you from the moment after you soothed me from a nightmare the first time. But I knew you also had something with Steve and Tony and they are so much more deserving of you than me so I just never said anything. Tried everything in my power to hide it down deep so you wouldn’t be influenced by it.”  

I start to laugh. “This is like some romance novel shit. Two idiots in love. Scared to tell other because of their fucked-up pasts.”   

“Those tend to conclude with a happy ending. Our mess is far too complicated for that.”  

“I’m a mutant James who can weaponize their emotions. I’ve never known uncomplicated. I can handle messy. I’m great at messy. I can deflect and suppress and then use it to my advantage in battle. But you and I aren’t that, are we? Tony, Steve and I are a complex puzzle of complications. While you and I have always been easy. I’ve tried to deny it, push it away. Because I knew you thought of it as complication to the life you were trying to live under the radar. So I happily soaked up whatever piece of you you’d give me.”  

“You really are self-destructive, aren’t you? Denying yourself what you truly wanted while feeding off of the scraps you were given. Either by men who only wanted you for what you could do for them or the man who felt undeserving to be in your presence.”  

“When you put it that way.” I shrug. “Feeling sucks. This is why I preferred to numb all those pesky emotions with whatever substance would help me float away. I stopped doing that and well look where it got me. Chasing that high between the bedsheets of men who’s hearts belong to another while secretly hoping the one you truly want comes to his senses.”  

“I’m sorry.” Bucky whispers.  

“No need to apologize. You did nothing wrong. You’re allowed to feel broken and take all the time you need to heal. Just like Steve is allowed to try and fool himself into thinking he could truly love someone other than Peggy. Or Tony with Pep. I don’t fault any of you for your actions. I know better than anyone that emotions are chaos. That’s why I did what was best for me and came here. Protecting the little peace I have left.”  

“And you wonder why I felt undeserving to love you. Even now you’re thinking of everyone else. Making them feel better about their actions. But I’m not okay with what happened. Especially because I was the catalyst for what resulted in physical pain to the woman I love.”  

“It couldn’t be helped Buck. There will always be something out there to cause me harm.”  

“But it shouldn’t be because of me!” He grits out. The pain evident in his voice.  

On instinct, I step forward and wrap my arms around him. As if my embrace gave him permission to surrender, Bucky’s shoulders sag and he heaves a heavy sigh. Wrapping his arms around me tightly. Tucking his face into my neck and inhaling my scent as if it were a calming balm.  

“I’m going let you guys work this out alone. I’ll be up at the main house when you need me.” Steve declares.  

“You don’t have to go Steve.”  

“Actually I do. I have some things I need to think and work out myself in regard to our relationships. This has been eye opening in a way I can’t ignore.”  

“I never wanted to hurt you, Steve.”  

“You didn’t, doll. Don’t worry about me right now. I’ll be okay. Buck needs you.”  

With a soft smile he walks out the door. Leaving Bucky and I to the quiet of my cabin.  

“How do we fix this? How do I make it right? We can’t go back to the compound. Not with how mad Tony is.” Bucky rambles.  

“Shh. You have to try and not spiral into panic. Everything will sort itself out in due time.” I begin to rock us back and forth. “We can stay here as long as we need to. Clint will keep us safe. No one will get to you that isn’t allowed access.”  

He nods his head against my collarbone. “Okay.”  

I feel the lightest touch as he places his lips to base of my throat and leaves a featherlight kiss.  

I weave the fingers of my left hand through his brunette locks. Pulling his head back and placing my right hand against the scruff lining his jaw. I then lose myself to the icy blue depths of his soulful eyes.  

“Your eyes are shining amber again.”  

“Seems I can’t control it yet. Looks like they’ll be giving me away every time I look at you for more than a moment.”  

“I like it.”  

“Great for the ego, I’m sure.”   

“Fuck my ego. Makes my chest feel all warm knowing that I’m the only one who has ever made them do that.”  

The only appropriate response my body can give is to lean down and kiss his stupid handsome face.

[ao3feed-irondadspiderson]

A good kid

https://archiveofourown.org/works/51064264 by Watermeloness Peter’s head is killing him. And the hunger. Right now the headache takes precedence though, as it feels like his skull is too small to contain his brain. The pressure behind his eyes has him imagine he’s one of those sick dog breeds, the Cavalier, that MJ told him about. Their cerebellum can’t fit in their head, she had said. He wonders if it hurts this bad. Or, Peter’s guilt complex has him missing meals, causing him to faint. Tony and Pepper finally have a much needed heart-to-heart with the kid. Words: 2066, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Series: Part 2 of A good kid Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Iron Man (Movies) Rating: Not Rated Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Categories: Gen Characters: Peter Parker, Tony Stark, Pepper Potts, Steve Rogers Relationships: Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Pepper Potts Additional Tags: Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Pepper Potts Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Adopted Peter Parker, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Disordered Eating, nothing major, peter just skips a few meals, Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Peter Parker, Fainting, Parent Tony Stark, Parent Pepper Potts read it on AO3 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/51064264

[therese-lokidottir]

Btw why every single fan fiction I seeing (not all but many) is Tony stans? I meant they always put Tony in good light and 'oh poor baby' and worst of it they make other characters be worst and top of it is steve

Now, everyone have free will to writing what they want but come on, it's getting annoying. Specially it's so clear Tony is never good person, sure he have his good moments but the rest? He not nice to he so called close friends and lover

And Steve? Please just because he is a soldier didn't meant he is bad, I meant sure American soldiers and soldiers generally have bad reputation, but Steven prove it he more just a soldier, he is a man.

Also it's kind bothering me while this issue never been showing it but Steve is quite religius person and Tony is atheist. And now I am no want make some kind hateful comments but I feel little bit got insulted by it.

I meant if you have religion didn't make you good person but well they make Steve like that and hate him sound like imply something

I don't think Tony Stark is bad. I think he is a wonderfully complex character when written well when written within his film series. But then Civil War happened and then the MCU Spider-Man movies had to make the choices that they made.

In the original Iron Man film Tony is egotistical, he is selfish and he is a complete mess but he is still a man with a heart. He is genuinely remorseful for what his weapons have done and he wants to change and do good. Tony is a man who struggles with his ego and with being vulnerable. He has trouble letting down those walls even to his best friends who have stood by him through so much, he's still scared.

In the Iron Man films, those were flaws Tony needed to learn from. Tony needed to learn and grow and you do see that. But then CA: CW didn't quite get that. Tony does have compassion, he does have sympathy for people. But in CA: CW it's more about guilt than it is about responsibility and self-reflection. He gets called out but some mom, but was this not something Tony Stark was struggling with? Was he not already giving to the relief efforts?

People can argue that Steve was doing wrong things in CA: CW, he was breaking laws regardless of the accords, but Tony consciously does things that question if the accords have any legitimacy in the first place. He uses an untrained 15-year-old for backup without giving them full details of the situation and lying to their legal guardian. Tony's team initiates the fight and causes collateral damage because he's permitted to do so. Lastly, he ends up snapping and trying to murder someone and he never has to face repercussions for that, legal ones I mean. He's pushing for the accords while it's clear he doesn't have to abide by why they are supposed to be there.

Contrasting all that to Steve desperately trying to help his friend, consoles someone facing eminence guilt, and allows others to leave without judgment while giving them the full story, does make Steve seem a lot nicer and more human. Bucky was brainwashed, abused, and used by Hydra and the reason they could do that was because Howard Stark used Hydra members to build S.H.I.E.L.D. All because he thought it was acceptable to for the sake of protecting the world.

The problem with Tony's "mentorship" of Peter is he treats Peter more like a project than someone who is their own independent person he's meant to be guiding and pointing in the right direction. Of course, there is the metatextual problem of shifting from billionaires the bad guys to working-class bad guys in the franchise about the hero who is usually the working-class street-level hero.

The MCU really seemed to forget Tony was an ass he needed to be better. He ends up never learning and the MCU seemed to forget Tony's ego was both bad and annoying, and also kind of a coping mechanism and cover Tony was using to deal with his issues.

[hurtspideyparker]

Peter Parker's Guilt Complex

Uncle Ben died because he didn't step up. If he isn't using his powers for good, then he's using them for bad. There is no neutrality for him, no stepping away from Spider-Man. We see this shown in Captain America Civil War:

"when you can do the things that I can, but you don't, and then the bad things happen? they happen because of you"

Peter takes responsibility for the city of New York's safety all in his own back. Tony Stark validates him as a hero by having him fight alongside and against the Avengers, which fuels his belief that he's able to take on more than petty crime (when Tony doesn't provide anything more high-stakes, he takes his own risks. if bigger, badder things are out there and he isn't there to stop them? his fault.)

He can't step away, even for his own safety (his fault his fault his fault)

When he nearly dies in that collapsed building in homecoming it becomes glaringly obvious that there are no other heroes coming to save him. Even Peter Parker needs Spider-Man to save him; this only hammers in the idea that he can never rest as a hero, because then who else will save the city?

Peter drops his extracurriculars, stops hanging out with his friends. He becomes consumed with his hero identity (no breaks no time what if they need me what if there's danger what if I was having fun or doing homework while someone was dying?).

Then Peter becomes an Avenger, fights in a war, and loses people. Loses Tony. He's 16 and he just saved the world - so he takes a break. Goes to Europe with his class. Aunt May snuck the Spider-Man suit in his bag; the red and blue follow him like a ghost and he's haunted by expectations to save the world, to be the next Stark.

And Fury is there to remind him once again what a failure he is (step up, fight, no breaks. my fault my fault my fault). And for the first time in his career he considers that maybe the world is better without Spider-Man. Maybe he just makes things worse.

Beck is better. Beck will fix things. Peter chooses to be just a little selfish for once and hands over the Stark legacy to someone more qualified so he can go kiss a pretty girl.

It backfires; Peter's guilt nearly swallows him whole. Not only did he shit on everything great Tony thought he was, but now he's handed a super weapon to the latest villain hell bent on killing him and his friends (the people around me get hurt the people I care about the people that I put in danger my fault my fault my fault).

When his identity is revealed maybe a small part of him thinks he deserves this. The public may have the details wrong but in the end they're right, he's a fraud and a danger. He hurts the people he loves, lets them down and puts them in harm's way.

Ned and MJ can't get into MIT because of him, he tries to fix it. He messes up the spell, he tries to fix it. May dies and he can't fix it (my fault my fault my fault).

He lets them go. Blinded by his guilt he can no longer see the light and love he brought into people's lives, only the darkness he's stained them with. He cuts the strings and along with it goes some of the guilt that weighs him down, but where the guilt resided is now a gaping hole of loneliness, his chest as hollow as the apartment he now lives in.

On nights where he misses Ned's laughter, and MJ's witty comments, May's hugs, and working in Tony's lab, he still hears the voice in his head reminding him my fault my fault my fault. Though instead of guilt it only brings melancholy and resignation. This decision has to be the right one because the only person it's hurting is himself.

Peter Parker was a guilty man. So he gave up everything he had until there was nothing left to be guilty for.

Peter Parker is a selfless man.

[aaronymous999]

Peter Parker who was taken under the wing of a man who had all the power in the world, and acted as a father figure. Peter Parker who cared and loved his father figure but also felt an immense guilt and mixed feelings about him due to him being the opposite of everything Peter stands for, and on a more meta level, being this universe’s equivalent of Norman Osborn for Peter in a lot of ways- ( Billionaire, Profits off military technology/dangerous weapons that put people in harms way, in some ways could be read as people with a pull yourself up from your bootstraps mentality, and always being focused on the big picture instead of looking out for the little guy. )

When Tony Stark dies, friendly neighborhood Spider-Man is expected to take on the mantle of Stark Industries and facing world ending threats just like Tony, but also all the baggage he carried. Peter is gripped with complex feelings on if he even is allowed to be sad- or if he should even be questioning his grief at all, and if questioning his grief makes him a horrible person. Is taking over Stark Industries an extension of his responsibility, or would it be an inherently wrong act?

The MCU missed so many opportunities to play around with Peter’s morality in a context where he exists in the same universe as the Avengers, they do it a bit in No Way Home but not nearly enough! Let Peter have complex moral conflicts and a strict moral code that is challenged! What’s the difference between stopping someone for good by mercifully ending their life, or angrily trying to kill Norman Osborn, a man not always in control of his actions, but who is also in a similar boat as Tony Stark? Are these the same or different? Is killing ever okay, and is encouraging and propping up figures like Tony Stark ever okay?