#today i had more plans but sister had friends over and i still don't have a chance to get on computer (kinda because of sis as well...)

[estaticheart]

ᥫ᭡. THAT’S MY SISTER YOU BITCH

Summary: Despite Sarah and Rafe’s volatile relationship, that’s your sister.

Warnings: Violence, illusions to sex, swearing.

You had a great day so far. You'd woken up to Rafe in between your legs, waking you up in the best way possible before he made you both breakfast as you watched him from the island. Sometimes you just liked to ponder on how lucky you were to have a boyfriend like Rafe. To everyone else, you were far from lucky but you liked it that way- knowing only you got the real Rafe Cameron.

Now, you were on your way back from grocery shopping, planning to make Rafe a romantic meal when he arrived back from work. Blasting music from your car speakers, you were completely in the zone. Until you drove up to the City Hall, glancing ahead you saw Kelce's red truck, which you thought nothing of until you saw him and his idiotic friends surrounding John B and Sarah.

Alarmed, you pulled up next to the truck, gathering the attention of everyone. Despite being a kook yourself, you were far different from the rest of them. You didn't care about pogues, to you they were like anyone else, in fact often you preferred the pogues in the Outer Banks to the kooks. Rafe's circle exclusively consisted of kooks, meaning you often received a lot of respect from kooks even though you spent a lot of your time arguing with them. Rafe didn't mind it, you were his girlfriend and lover, so if you wanted to yell he wouldn't stop you.

"Problem?" You asked, slamming your car door shut behind you. Just as Sarah hit the ground. Immediately you rushed towards Sarah. Yeah, Rafe and Sarah had problems they needed to get past but to you, Sarah was still as important as she was 2 years ago. You were proud of her for finding her true love and true friends, and you always let her know that you would always be there for her. And this time was no exception. Putting two and two together, you saw Ruthie standing much closer to Sarah than the other kooks who looked at her in shock.

They all stood stunned at your arrival, to be honest, you were probably the worst possible person to show up at that exact moment. Everyone knew your opinions on the Pogues were far more empathetic than the other kooks. "No, no problem" Kelce muttered, beginning to pull Ruthie and the others back from Sarah and John B, to which they happily obliged. Not on your watch.

"Oh no, don't stop on my accord guys. Please whatever you were going to do next. Do it." Walking over to them, Ruthie stood stunned at your arrival. Since she started dating Topper, you got a lot of joy out of berating her, publically. For once, she didn't back down at your words. "She needs to watch herself. She pushed me first, it was self-defence." Ruthie said, glancing behind you to see John B pulling Sarah to her feet.

Snorting you replied, "Ruthie, I'm not Shoupe. Don't start pleading your case, I don't care." She stalled at your response, for a moment thinking that you were on her side for pushing Sarah before you pulled her back to reality. Walking closer to her, edgingly slow, you pressed, "You think you're all big and mighty for pushing Sarah? She's 19 Ruthie, you're what? 21? Don't you think you should play with someone your own size?"

Behind you, John B and Sarah smirked at the group. Unbeknownst to you, Sarah was pregnant and John B was far too occupied to make sure Sarah was okay than to pick a fight with Kelce and his goons today. But you happily would, and even better so because who was going to fight back against the kook princess? Definitely not these ones.

“Well?” You pushed, as you stood toe to toe with Ruthie. You were growing impatient, Rafe would have finished work by now meaning that soon he’d come looking for you- and you’d rather give Ruthie a good couple punches before Rafe showed up.

“Okay times up.” Before she could even think, your fist sent her backwards onto the floor, just how Sarah had been when when you arrived. Groaning, she lifted her hands to cover her nose, assumably bleeding- hopefully broken if Rafe’s self defence lessons had done some good. “Oh my god- I think you broke my nose. You bitch.” She shrieked, pulling her hands away to reveal blood beginning to pour from her nose.

Ruthie was nothing but a bully, a bully you’d had enough of tormenting the island. Your legs either side of her chest you crouched over her, “Don’t worry you still look just as bad as before.” You muttered as you flew your fist back into her face that she left unguarded. Idiot. Her screaming began again, as you moved off from her, deciding that your two punches had done enough damage. Wow, you’d really have to thank Rafe for those lessons.

“Just wait until Topper hears about this, he will deal with you.” One of the other kooks muttered from behind Kelce. “Yeah I’m sure Topper will be sure to deal with me.” You laughed, Topper wouldn’t touch a hair on your arm as long as you were dating Rafe- everyone knew that.

“You want to fuck with someone, not Sarah.” You spat at them, watching Ruthie sadly pull herself to her feet, with the help of no one. “That’s my sister you bitch. Now fuck off.” At your command, Kelce briskly walked back over to his truck, as the others followed just as fast, allowing you to turn back to John B and Sarah.

You were greeted to their smiling faces, both as grateful as each other. But you noticed, a twinge of emotion still lingering on Sarah’s face. Hearing you call her your sister in combination with her pregnancy hormones, was due to set her off to cry. Before she could get out any words, you spoke for her. “You are my sister regardless of whatever is going on between you and Rafe. You’re family.” Turning to John B, you continued, “That extends to you, hubby.” You winked looking down at the ring on his finger.

With a red blush covering their faces, they praised you in thank yous. “Don’t need to thank me for doing something I’ve been wanting to do for months.” Glancing back to see the red truck had disappeared.

“Now, you can thank me for warning you that Rafe will be here any minute and I’m not sure you want to see him.”

—————————

“Baby, please be more careful next time.” Rafe muttered, as he wrapped your knuckles in bandages. He was more than shocked to find you outside the city hall- alone- but with bloody knuckles. Only with the explanation, that you had an altercation with Ruthie, surprisingly over Sarah. He was confused to say the least, he wasn’t even aware that Ruthie had a problem with his little sister. But the more he thought about it, of course she did- Topper still hadn’t gotten over her.

“In fact, there will be no next time. Ever.” Kissing your knuckles, he pulled you onto his chest as he lied back on your shared king bed. Stroking your hair, he let his mind wonder. Should he have been there to protect Sarah? But they hadn’t had a good relationship in years, he couldn’t just suddenly start caring for her. He also couldn’t let you get into situations that could get you hurt over protecting Sarah.

You noticed his body still and you knew instantly his mind was wondering thinking about Sarah. Without moving your head from his chest you spoke, “Rafe. I love Sarah. I know you have a difficult relationship at the moment and whilst you can’t protect her I will.” Letting the silence sit between you for a moment, you decided to continue.

“She’s our only family, Rafe.” He didn’t move, but you both knew how right you were. She was all you had left. “I know baby, I know.” He whispered, laying a kiss on the top of your head, before he let his mind slip back into imagining how he can rectify this broken relationship with his sister.

[poppadom0912]

Hi, Would you make a Halstead!sister where she is a teen and have her very first boyfriend and when she decides to break up with him he hits her. She wants to hide it from her brothers but they found out anyway

Warnings: Abuse and violence, swearing, canon-typical injuries.

A/N: Okay, this fic will be the last one for a while and I mean it this time. Writing this was so random but I got sudden inspo when I found this half written soooo please do enjoy!!

You swear that this wasn't supposed to get as bad as it did.

You were still in high school and it might've been your first boyfriend and it definitely took too many tries to convince your brothers to give you permission to date but somehow, you got it in the end.

Several times, both Jay and Will but mainly Jay, warned you of abusive, manipulative and toxic partners which you knew existed but never thought you would date someone as such.

Joey was nice at first. After inviting him over for dinner a few times, your brothers began to be more lenient towards him though they would never admit it aloud.

Yes, they were still quite wary considering you were both still young and in school but over the course of a few months, you were finally allowed to go on a date alone without them acting as chaperones.

Then, it came to your break up.

During school, you and your best friend found Joey and another girl in your year locking lips against her locker without any shame at all. It was there and then you decided that evening you were going to break it off with him.

The two of you met up in the school car park where he would usually drive you home but unbeknownst to him, you had different plans for that today.

You hated how he was acting so nonchalant, the biggest smile on his face when he noticed you walking up to his car. You felt sick, desperately wanting to smack that smirk off his face.

"Y/N! Baby, I missed you at lunch. Where-" Joey started, opening his arms to embrace you but was cut off.

"Don't call me baby." You said sharply, your tone showing you were being completely serious. "We're done Joey."

Joey blinked, tilting his head to the side in confusion before laughing. "Oh Y/N, you're hilarious! Come on, we're going to my house-"

Once again, you cut him off, harshly shoving his hand off your elbow. "No, I'm being serious Joey. We're breaking up."

His face immediately fell at your words. All of a sudden, with the flip of a switch, he changed completely. It was so fast that it started scaring you.

Before allowing him to get a word in, you turned around so you could walk away and go home on your own but you were held back. A hand was suddenly tightly gripping your wrist, pulling you back towards Joey.

"What the hell!?" You exclaimed, trying to rip your hand out of his but he wouldn't budge.

"Joey, you're hurting me. Let go." You said, trying to reason with him but nothing was working.

You tried to calm him down, Jay's voice in the back of your mind explaining step by step what to do in cases like this but you found yourself frozen, unable to defend yourself alike to how you were taught.

It was all so sudden. One moment you were angrily staring up at Joey and the next you were looking to your left, your right cheek burning as it tingled with numbness.

Both of you were shocked at his actions. Using his shock to your advantage, you pulled your wrist out of his hand, ignoring the burning sensation you felt and ran.

*****

Unfortunately for you, it was a friday night and that meant both your older brothers were at home. Typically, on the weekends, you swapped and went to Will's before going back to Jay's for the weekdays. So that meant Will was at Jay's apartment to pick you up.

You were still breathing heavily as you entered the house, unintentionally slamming the front door shut as you came to your senses.

You were home. You were safe.

"Y/N, are you okay?" Jay shouted from the living room. He heard the door slam and was confused since he knew he specifically told you to never slam doors.

"Uh- yeah." You hesitated, licking your lips as you answered. "I'm, I'm good."

"You're red and sweaty- did you run all the way here?" Jay asked after a moment of studying you, taking note of your red cheeks and sweat collecting forehead.

"Yeah I did, I'm bursting for the toilet." You quickly thought of an excuse, lying about why you ran home.

Before he could reply, you dashed past him towards the bathroom to keep up with said lie.

"Hey Y/N-Oh..." Will words were lost as he watched you disappear as quick as he saw you.

"What's up with her?" Will asked, looking confusingly at Jay and down the hall where you disappeared.

"I'm not sure."

****

Joey went back to disturbing you as soon as monday came. The weekend seemingly getting on his nerves because he was buzzing monday morning to the point that you turned back around whenever you saw him.

But you could only run so far from him because at the end of the day as you waited for your best friend, he was grabbing you way too hard.

This process only repeated itself for the next two weeks, becoming almost routine where you only missed him for two days overall.

Three weeks since he first laid hands on you, you were now covered in an amalgamation of redness, bruises and finger-shaped marks.

Today though, today something changed.

It was friday, nearly a month since you broke up with Joey and you were walking to Med. Will was supposed to pick you up but his latest patient was causing problems and asked for you to walk to the hospital only ten minutes away.

So you and one of your friends who lived near that area walked together, departing as you reached the ED doors and she walked home.

As you waved her off, your smile bright and hurting still from how much both of you were laughing, you weren't paying too much attention to your surroundings. You didn't think there would be much danger outside a guarded ED but alas.

One second your waving your friend off and the next, your on your hands and knees on the floor. It happened so fast you couldn't comprehend what even occurred.

"What the-"

Someone harshly pulling you up stopped your trail of thought, their grip so tight that you couldn't focus on the burning in your palms and knees.

"Joey! Let me go you dickhead!" You shouted at the boy as soon as you looked up at the perpetrator.

Pulling your wrists from grasp, you grunted when his grip didn't let up, instead it did the opposite and tightened to the point that your hand was starting to go pale.

"Please Joey- Please just let me go and we can talk this out, I promise." You pleaded with him, eyes going glassy when he started pulling you away from the hospital entrance, panic finally setting in.

You tried pulling yourself away, heels digging into the ground to stop him but he was too strong, his height and build giving him an advantage along with being on the football team while you barely even participated in gym.

"Joey your hurting me-" You were cut off when he shoved you up against the wall head first and then repeatedly shoved your head back when you kept talking.

"Shut up bitch!" He almost screeched, hand on your forehead to prevent your head from moving, ensuring your eyes remained on him.

Your vision blurred, head banging with what felt like the worst headache in the universe. Your reply was simply a whine, no words possible due to the pain he inflicted.

His elbow was digging into your torso, your lungs and ribs restricted from any movement because of the pressure.

"J-Jo..." Everything of his increased, his grip, his shouts, the pain he caused.

Your breathing was taken away from you when he suddenly brought his fist to your torso repeatedly.

All of a sudden, he disappeared and you were falling, your legs unable to support you.

Before you could meet the ground, you were caught and being hauled into an embrace you hadn't felt in a decade. The familiar cologne one you bought with your own pocket money and a voice you'd known since birth.

"I've got you Y/N." Will whispered to you, cradling you gently in his arms.

"Ethan, you got him?" Will called out to his colleague but you were so out of it you couldn't see the other doctor.

"I'll handle him, get her inside." Ethan replied as he restrained Joey, his past military training helping him plenty.

The last thing you remembered was Will's reassuring words before everything went black.

*****

"We have to wait for her to wake up to determine how bad the concussion is but besides that, she's okay." Will finished explaining to Jay the prognosis who arrived five minutes ago.

"She's also got old bruises." Jay finally looked up from your face to Will's, anguish clear on the latter's face. "This has been going on for a while now."

Jay was speechless.

He was at a crime scene when Will called him, something neither brother did when they knew the other was at work and despite trying to anticipate what was going to happen, he could never guess it would be this.

Will explained that he and Ethan were taking a quick breather outside together after the death of their last patient when they heard a man shouting and though they couldn't see you, Will easily recognised Joey.

While Ethan subdued Joey, Will wasted no time in getting you to safety and inside the ED where Connor treated you.

There would be no long lasting effects from any of the injuries but they were bound to stick around for a while and they would definitely hurt.

Will couldn't get it out of his memory - seeing your ex boyfriend continuously punching you with no remorse and almost strangling you with the death grip he had. Will saw it every time he blinked and felt like puking.

Jay had walked passed Joey when he entered the ED and to say he felt like throttling the boy was putting it very, very lightly.

But Jay had plans for little Joey, he was more than confident that Voight would let him have a few words with him later. Especially if it involved you - his boss seemed to have a weak spot whenever you were involved, everyone did.

"I need to find Goodwin and get off shift early, I'll be back." Will said. Maggie could only do so much for so long.

Jay hummed. "I've got her, she's not going anywhere don't worry."

Will hadn't been gone for long when you started coming back to. Jay was messaging Hailey, asking for updates on what they were doing with Joey when he felt your fingers twitch in his other available hand.

Jay waited patiently, forcing himself to let you take your time and not rush you just in case. Will mentioned a concussion that they weren't too sure on the extent on its damage.

Your whimpers had his heart in your control, a lump in his throat at you clearly in pain and his inability to cure and rid of all your ills.

Seeing your eyes, the colour so bright under the hospital lights and because of the fear you felt so vividly, Jay found himself unable to breath for a moment.

"Is he gone?" You whispered, voice hoarse as you squinted up at your older brother.

"Yes he is." Jay nodded, ignoring the burning that randomly enveloped his eyes and brushed your hair back with such a feather light touch that you didn't register the gesture. "He's never going to touch or bother you ever again, I promise."

The only response you could formulate was tears, the waterworks instant as soon as the words came out of Jay's mouth.

"Will and I will make sure nothing happens ever again, we promise."

[wlwsoccerfics]

Protective Soulmates(AlessiaRussoXLeahWilliamsonXWilliamsonReader)

Warning: concussion and symptoms,this Is a platonic relationship, there is no Romance in this, mentions of periods

Summary: your sister Leah & childhood best friend Alessia are very protective of you so you don't tell them about your concussion.

Leah & Alessia were still asleep (they often slept at your place) while you were already in the shower, you did end up slipping and hitting your head on the Wall, not bad enough to make it bleed but bad enough to give you a mild concussion. You knew the signs cause this wasn't your first one unfortunately.

You threw up into the shower, silently praying that your sister & platonic soulmate wouldn't hear you. Thankfully they didn't. When you stopped throwing up & cleaned the vomit away , you took your time to dry yourself off and put on your Trainings Kit. Cause you had to be at practice in an hour. Ignoring the pulsing headache that made your skull feel like it was gonna Split open.

After that you went to into the kitchen to make some Smoothies for Lessi, Leah & yourself You already heard the shower going off while you were in the middle of preparing the pre-practice smoothie. So you knew at least one of your favorite Humans was awake. Maybe even both. Who knew.

You would find out soon though cause Leah walked down the stairs and gave you a gentle side hug. " Hey little sis!' she answered and ruffled your hair, which almost made you vomit cause it put pressure on your head. "L-leah. Morning!" You quickly recover from the pain but she still looked at you a bit concerned. "Are you alright?" Your sister wanted to know. "I am okay!" You answered and handed her a Smoothie. "If you say so! Thanks for the Smoothie!" Your sister sat down on the kitchen counter. Sipping on her smoothie. You noticed that she was studying your face. Before either of you could say anything Alessia walked in. Kissing your cheek. "Hello sunshine!" She greeted you and you hand her a Smoothie as well, just like you did a few minutes earlier with Leah. "Morning Lessi!" You replied, smiling through the throbbing pain in your head. But it was clear something was going on. "You are not feeling well, i can tell!" Alessia answered. "I am fine!" You claimed, taking a small sip of your own Smoothie. "No you are not. I know when you are lying and i will make it my mission to find out. If you don't tell us today i am gonna call Jill!" Alessia answered. You frowned a bit but managed to cover that up well. Or at least you thought so. "You don't need to call her! I am fine! Just starting my period soon! That's all!" thankfully that was true because Alessia knew when you start your period. The two of you are almost in sync when it came to that. Jill was your girlfriend. She played for Manchester City & the dutch national Team. She was even more protective of you then your sister and Lessi. And you didn't plan on having her worry about you either.

Leah & Lessi finally stopped bothering you with wanting to find out what was going on but you knew they would keep an eye for you all day. Thankfully you didn't have to drive to practice today cause Alessia offered to do that. The music in the Car wasn't loud at all but to you it felt that way. But you knew the drive was only ten minutes long so you took all of the mental strength you had and pulled through. The three of you talked about the upcoming game against Chelsea.

When you reached your Destination the three of you walked to the locker room, putting away your stuff before walking to the trainings pitch. Appearently you looked quite pale because a few of your teammates and Renée asked If you were alright. Which you claimed to be while you tried not to let it show how bad things really were. Practice was going okay for you until you did a practice match and since you wanted to Show how okay you were you went for a Header. The ball went into the net and you went to the ground, passed out. "Y/N!" Alessia ran over to you, followed by Leah, Wally, Katie & Beth. "Someone get the medics!" Renée yelled out. Kneeling down next to you. "Williamson, wake up please." She said and thankfully you did. But you felt confused and your ears were ringing. The medics took you inside and laid you down, checking you over. Alessia and Leah were with you and surely you would hear about it later when you felt better because you admitted that you got hurt this morning and you obviously just made your concussion worse. The medic said they should take you home and If things got worse they should take you to the Hospital. You needed to rest for the next few days.

At home you went to bed right away and Alessia would wake you every hour to make sure you are alright & wouldn't get worse. What you didn't knew was that Leah had already told Jill about it. And sure enough your girlfriend showed up a few hours later, switching places with Alessia who was lying next to you. When she woke you up to check on you her eyes were full of concern, love and a hint of Anger cause you put yourself in danger. "Hi,Mijn engel(my Angel) you need to take better care of yourself, that was dangerous." She whispered out. You manage to Roll to the side and hide your face in her shoulder. "I am sorry, babe!" You told her. You talked for a few minutes and she told you she would be there for the next few days. It was not like she was playing on the next match because she still was recovering from a twisiting her ankle. Which was why she was still limping a bit.

A few days later you felt better and Jill, Leah & Alessia all made you promise to never hide stuff like that from them or they would become even more protective of you, If that was even humanly possible. It did annoy you sometimes with how protective they were but If you were honest with yourself You knew how lucky you were to have them care about you and your health so much.

[ponderingmoonlight]

Megumi's little sister falling head over heels for Yuji (and maybe Sukuna?)

Pairing: Megumi's sister x Yuji; Megumi's sister x Sukuna; Megumi's siter x Mugumi sibling dynamic (Megumi being a cool big bro)

Word Count: 2,7k

Synopsis: After being set on a mission with your crush Yuji, your big brother and Nobara, things don't go as planned as all and force Yuji to sacrifice himself before you have the chance to tell him how you feel. Until Sukuna appears...

Warnings: drama over drama, hurt over hurt, but also a lot of fluff

Notes: I hate to brag about my own work, but this is honestly one of my favorite fics out of my own feather so PLEASE interact in some kind of way with it - will be forever grateful <3

Tags: @sunshine7queen @selen1um-hexafluoride @sanicsmut (tagging you bc I bet you'll like that)

Your breath gets stuck in your throat, just one look at the boy next to your brother is enough to make your heart skip a beat. Yuji Itadori is a walking green flag, the best boyfriend material you stumbled upon in your life. Just seeing his bright smile is enough for you to feel like flying, his inviting brown eyes sweeping you off your feet on a regular basis.

“Oh look, there’s (y/n)”, Yuji speaks out in excitement.

Despite the fact that you are Megumi’s younger sister, you are the complete opposite to him. Kind, open-minded and oh so sweet. When Yuji joined jujutsu high, you were the first who greeted him with open arms, showed him around, trained with him, gave him every little advice you’ve had. It truly is unavoidable to fall head over heels for you in that white uniform with that smile as bright as the sun.

“Hey Yuji, hey grumpy-cat”, you greet both boys, earning a huff from your big brother.

“What are you doing here, (y/n)? Aren’t you supposed to be on a mission right now?”, Megumi questions.

“Oh, Toge and Panda took over for me as the curse seems to be a grade 1. Also, Gojo-sensei needs me here for the training sessions”, you clarify.

Right, the training sessions. It doesn’t sit right with Megumi that you are partly responsible for them. You are a skilled jujutsu sorcerer, especially your tajutsu abilities are truly outstanding and it’s no surprise that you are the best combat fighter along with Maki. That’s why you grew especially close with Yuji…

Megumi hates the way his friend looks at you with hearts glistening in his eyes and heart hammering so loud that even he is able to hear it. It is no secret to anyone anymore that Yuji Itadori is hopelessly in love with you. How could he not? You are breathtaking beautiful and the kindest person walking on this earth with an angelic voice that could end wars. Only fools wouldn’t fall for you.

But the thing is that you seem to like him too. You, his little precious sister, the one thing he loves more than anything else in this world. The thought of you and Yuji being together alone makes his guts turn.

“Aren’t you too weak for that? You’re still a first year”, Megumi comments dryly.

“Huh? (y/n) is just as strong as you and me, maybe even better. I’m sure she will be great!”, Yuji instinctively replies.

You can’t help but admire him, that beautiful boy with the purest soul. Not even the fact that he inherits parts of the most dangerous curse on this whole planet can keep you from stumbling, crashing and falling for him.

“Yuji, I was wondering if you…If you’d like to meet up with me after today’s training”, you begin, nervously fumbling with your hair.

“No. Way. In. Hell”, Megumi hisses through gritted teeth.

Before Yuji is able to comprehend what is happening or even to answer your precious question, Megumi drags him along with him, away from your striking sight, back at Jujutsu High.

“See you, (y/n)!”, he shouts over his shoulder while waving you goodbye.

“Yeah…”, you mutter, hand dropping in disappointment.

When will you ever be able to get to know him better without your big brother interrupting every sweet moment you have?

“That girl…”

Sukuna leans forward, hand stroking his chin thoughtfully.

You are a pain in the ass, always on this brat’s mind. But you are very easy on his eyes, truly a beauty with decent abilities.

He laughs to himself, eyeing you up and down as your figure disappears.

“This will be fun…”

-the next day-

 It sounded so simple and enticing at first. Don’t fight, exclusively rescue survivors, if you encounter a special grade: run. Pairing up with Megumi, Nobara and Yuji. A difficult but manageable task.

Until you got caught in a sphere.

Until Nobara disappeared.

Until Megumi’s divine dog got killed and a special grade curse appeared in front of your very own eyes.

“We can’t leave without her!”, you yell, eyes roaming around in a desperate attempt to find Nobara.

“Not now, (y/n). We’ll find her later, right now we have to-“

This presence. The sheer presence of this creature takes your breath away without even seeing it. There is no doubt that this is…

A special grade.

None of you move, just staring blankly at this thing with its wide open eyes and alien-like appearance next to you. No. You can’t just stand there, move, try to attack it, try to fight.

Suddenly Yuji lunges himself at it, trying to slice into that frightful creature. In the blink of an eye, his hand falls to the ground along with the cursed weapon Maki lent him.

“I-ita…Itadori?”, Megumi stutters next to you.

Time stands still. You can only stand there and watch in horror as he turns around, blood squirting out of his arm.

“Yuji!”, you scream on top of your lungs.

No. No. No.

This can’t be happening. This isn’t reality, right? Maybe it’s Sukuna who tries to play tricks on you. You aren’t even able to hear what Megumi and Yuji talk about, ears ringing so violently that you feel like fainting, sweat dripping from every pore.

Is this how you’ll die? In your first year, together with the boy you never admitted your feelings to and your brother? This can’t be how it ends, you still had so much planned…

“Hey Sukuna, if I die here you die too, right? So you have to help me out.”

“Not true. Even if the part of me that’s inside you dies, there are 18 other fragments of my soul still out there. Still irritatingly enough, I don’t have control of this body. If you want to switch, go ahead and switch. But once you do, I’ll kill that brat before the cursed spirit can! Then I’ll go for that woman. She’s a lively one, I’ll have fun with her. Last but not least, there’s your little friend over there, or should I say girlfriend? What a pleasure it will be to see the light in her fade while she’s staring at the eyes of the boy she loves!”

The thought of him killing his friends with his own hands is frightening enough but killing you…Yuji stares at you in disbelief, the way your glossy eyes are widen in nothing but fear.

“I’m not going to let you do that”, he hisses automatically.

“I bet. But if you’re too focused on me, your friends are gonna die.”

“(y/n), watch out!”

Megumi grabs your collar just in time and pulls you to the side before you get hit full force by the curse. You hold onto his uniform for dear life, feeling like you’ll throw up any minute. This is all too much, way more than you can handle. You don’t want to die yet, especially not here, especially without telling Yuji how you feel. Megumi…You can’t both die here.

“Fushiguro!”

You’re still so young, so full of life…

“Fushiguro!”

Out of instinct, your eyes dart towards Yuji. Control your breathing, gain regulator over your ringing ears.

“Take (y/n) and Kugisaki and get out of here. I’ll keep this one busy until you three are out. As soon as you’re out, give me some kind of signal. Once you do…I’ll switch with Sukuna.”

“You know you can’t do that! Not with one arm against a special grade!”, Megumi yells at him while holding onto you tightly.

“Yuji…”, you breathe out, tears now running down your cheeks like waterfalls.

Please, this can’t be happening right now. What Yuji suggests…

Is his certain death.

“Look closer, it’s having fun. It’s obviously toying with us. I can at least buy us some time.”

“No!”, you cry out while tearing you away from your brother’s tight grip to grasp Yuji’s sleeve.

“I can’t just leave you here like that!”

“Please, (y/n), you need to-“

“I love you!”, you blurt out.

“I love you!, Please don’t leave me like that, I love you…”

“I love you too, (y/n), but you have to go now. Fushiguro.”

Your brother’s eyes dart towards you. Despite he has to fight back tears himself, despite the fact that he hates seeing you like that he knows exactly that Yuji is right.

With a swift motion, he frees your hand from Yuji’s sleeve and throws you over his shoulder, carrying you away from this special curse.

Away from Yuji.

“Come on, (y/n). We’re getting through this”, he interject between your toe-curling screams.

All you can feel is numbing grief. You can’t even hear your own cries anymore, vision getting blurry over Megumi’s shoulder. None of this should have happened. This was supposed to be a rescue mission, all of you should have been running the second that curse appeared. But now Yuji is in there alone with a missing hand, risking his own life to save yours.

“Divine dogs, find Kugusaki”, Megumi’s voice shouts from far away, the tiles underneath you moving in rapid motion.

Until slowly but surely, everything around you seems to get dark.

“(y/n), you need to stay with me. (y/n)!”

-later-

Rain wets your face and takes your sight as you open your eyes. Where are you? What happened? You lift yourself up from your sitting position, eyes darting towards Nobara and Ijichi-san who is about to stitch her head up.

Where is Megumi? And what about Yuji? A lump forms in your throat when memories of your last encounter begin to flood your mind. If he’s dead…

You clench your hands into fist, watery eyes darting in front of you. No, don’t think like that. There has to be a reason for Megumi being missing. He must be on his way to look after Yuji. And you’ll definitely to the same.

Your rapid steps make the water to your feet spray in every direction, sharp and heavy breaths hanging in the air. You just have to concentrate on Yuji’s signature cursed energy. After spending so much time together, it’s no problem to detect him anymore. And then you’ll hug him like there’s no tomorrow. Yes, he probably switched with Sukuna and returned as soon as the cursed spirit was gone.

Something makes you stop in your tracks. Foreshadowing, fear, hope? You can’t tell. But the atmosphere around you changed completely. Is he…?

“Yuji?”, you murmur into the heavy rain of the evening.

“Sorry, he’s not coming back.”

You can’t catch your breath, eyes wide open as the body of Yuji pins you against a nearby tree. These tattoos, that smirk.

This is Sukuna.

You fight against his claws as hard as you can only for him to chuckle over your efforts. No, his hand doesn’t move an inch away from your arm, holding you in place effortlessly.

“No need to be frightened, (y/n). Let’s talk a little, shall we?”

“Bring him back”, you hiss through gritted teeth.

“Who knows why, but he can’t come back. So I’ll keep you entertained”, he replies.

Sukuna wraps his hand around your neck, squeezing ever so slightly. Oh, you really are lovely with your wet hair and skin, let alone the way you glare up at him while heavy breathing. Somehow he gets it, how this brat fell head over heels for you.

“I don’t wanna be entertained!”, you yell into his face.

With full force you rip yourself out of his firm grip and attack him. Fists fly through the air, sending him into a nearby tree.

“I’m surprised, when you beat that brat over and over I thought it was because he is weak when in fact, you are pretty strong!”, Sukuna shouts while running towards you with neck breaking speed.

You were never confronted with Sukuna. Since you know Yuji, he was always able to suppress his presence. But right now… Your blood freezes in your veins, the way his usual to tender brown eyes are lit by raging red makes shivers run down your spine.  

“Come on (y/n), give me all you’ve got!”

You fight as hard as you can, hitting him with full force over and over. Until it seems like he has enough.

He pushes you into the dirt violently, rain pouring down as all you can do is stare up into his amused face while he sits on top of you.

“Not bad, girl. Not bad”, he hums amused.

His hand sure feels good wrapped around your neck. Yes, slowly but surely Sukuna definitely understands what that brat sees in you. A ray of sunshine while being feisty, looking feminine while being so strong. Impressive, truly impressive. And how the rain pours down at your stunning face.

“Bring. Him. Back.”, you spit at him, very own eyes glistening in thick hatred.

“Come on, don’t look at me like that. After all I am technically him. Just a much better version.”

“You will never be him”, you bite back.

His weight on top of you along with his hand wrapped around your neck makes it hard to catch your breath, let alone think straight. Yuji’s uniform is now completely soaking wet, revealing his tight muscles underneath. Of course you always knew how well trained he is. After all, you touched him many times before. But this, him sitting on top of you, his hand wrapped around your neck…

You shake your head. But this isn’t Yuji Itadori. This is Sukuna, the king of curses.

“What’s on your mind? I bet you secretly like that.”

You glare up at him and his stupid grin. What are you supposed to do? Whatever is going on, it doesn’t seem as if Yuji will come back any time soon. Is Megumi around? You can detect him either.

So you have to deal with this on your own.

Fine.

One last deep breath. One last spark of focus to defeat him.

As fast as you can you lift and wrap your legs around his neck, pushing your hips through and holding his hands around your neck in place. With full force you pinch your knees, drive your hips forward and free yourself out of his grip. You can tell that he didn’t expect this, that he won’t fight back. Your fists darts towards his face, only inches away until-

“(y/n).”

Just inches before you hit his nose with full force, you stop in your tracks. No, this didn’t sound like Sukuna. Could it really be…?

“Are you okay?”

“Yuji”, you breathe out.

You tear up, a silent scream of relief escapes your lips as you lunge yourself towards him, landing on top of his chest as you hug him tightly.

“I thought I lost you…”

“Sorry that you were worried. Did Sukuna hurt you? Are you okay?”

His tender brown eyes wander along your slightly bruised body while a wave of respite washes over you. You thought he is dead. Or even worse, that Sukuna will occupy him forever. But he’s back, the boy you love more than anything else.

“I’m fine. How are you?”

Your nails dig into his biceps while you look up at him through wet lashes, rain still pouring down at both of you without mercy.

“I’m okay. Especially since you’re fine.”

Your heart flutters, emotions threaten to overflow.

Screw it. Screw all of it.

“I love you”, you breathe out.

And then your lips meet his. Crushing down at him without mercy, through the heavy rain falls. You let yourself sink into his arms, fireworks are set off inside your stomach. God, Yuji could have died today, the second he faced that cursed spirit alone you were almost certain that you’ll never see him again. But now…Now you’re lying in his arms, kissing him with so much passion that you feel like drowning and suffocating.

“I love you too, (y/n)”, he mumbles against your lips, smiling sweetly.

“God, how much I love you.”

[schrodingers-romy]

Jilted (not) Lover [Mitsuya Takashi x Reader]

Pairing: Mitsuya Takashi x GN!Reader Word Count: ~2,100 [Ao3 Link]

Summary: Takashi is your best friend (who you have some more than friendly feelings for); so you don't understand why he never seems to want to spend time with you anymore.

Warnings: mild misunderstandings, kissing, no gendered terms for reader; reader is a bit insecure, and Takashi is a little less emotionally mature than normal.

Notes: wasn't feeling good so I finally sat down and wrote an idea I've had for a while. Probably needs more editing but I want to let it finally fly free

You thought nothing of barging into your best friend’s room; after all, he gave you a spare key for a reason. “Takashi!” you called excitedly. “They let me off work early today! Do you wanna maybe go out and do something? I heard there was a new—”

You were cut off before you could even finish. “I’m sorry,” Takashi said, not even bothering to raise his eyes from the patterns in front of him. “I really need to finish this today.”

“Oh,” you said, deflating slightly. “Well, I could just hang around here if you want some company. I can help too!”

Still, you received barely any acknowledgement. “I’ve got it, I just need to focus. I’ll see you later, though.”

Your smile felt brittle. “Okay, sounds good. I’ll go see Yuzuha then. Don’t forget to show me your new design when you’re done.”

The door clicked shut softly behind you.

Later, you heard from Yuzuha that Takashi went out to the arcade with Hakkai that same day. You were hurt, but you wanted to think the best. Takashi probably just finished early and assumed you were busy. It was nothing.

Except it wasn’t.

-

Ever since the two of you met in middle school, you had never gone more than a few days without hanging out. Throughout high school you basically lived at his house, becoming almost like another sibling to his sisters. Even once you both graduated and got different jobs, the two of you spent most of your free time together. (Enough time together for you to develop a horrible infatuation with him, at the very least.)

And yet, for two weeks straight Takashi had been completely blowing you off.

He was always busy with last minute designs, or he had to take his sisters to something, or he already had plans with Draken or Hakkai or the old Toman members. Normally, he would ask you to tag along, but he barely talked to you other than to let you know he couldn’t see you or spend time with you.

You never said anything, keeping a nonchalant tone around him. But god, did it hurt. You didn’t know what you did wrong to deserve this treatment; you couldn’t remember anything. Maybe he had just finally gotten tired of you and was trying to let you down easy.

You did your best to ignore those thoughts. It’s Takashi, you thought. If there was something wrong, he would communicate with you. It was probably nothing. (You needed to tell yourself that to keep from breaking down.)

-

Even though your relationship with Takashi was at a standstill, you still talked to his sisters.

Today, you had come over to make the girls lunch before they left to go hang out with their friends. Takashi hadn’t come out from his room when you called.

[“It’s fine,” you said, “I know he’s busy.”

The girls gave each other a look when they thought you weren’t paying attention. At least these Mitsuyas noticed something was up, you thought bitterly.]

They were long gone, after thanking you for the food and each giving you an awkward teenager hug on the way out. You have the rest of the day free, so you take your time cleaning the dishes, in the pathetic hope that Takashi will come out and you two will go back to normal.

You think that your prayers are answered when you see him come down the stairs. He seems a little surprised to see you still there, and he gives you a small, distracted smile. Your heart flutters as you smile back.

You think he’s coming towards you, but he walks right by the kitchen and heads towards the door instead. “Thanks for making lunch for the girls. I’m sure it was great,” he says, lingering for a moment. “You can leave the rest of the dishes; I’ll get them when I come back.”

“Oh. Where are you going?” you ask. You can hear a nearly imperceptible buzzing in your ears. You wonder if you’re angry or just sad; it’s hard to tell sometimes.

“Just out with Draken. I’ll see you later, yeah?” He’s already opening the door to leave.

You try to keep your composure, but the way you slam the plate as you set it on the counter is telling. “Yeah. See you later, I guess.” You wince. Even to your own ears, you sound bitchy. And you were doing so well in keeping it straight...  

There is a second of hesitation, and then the door closes. You busy yourself with drying the remaining dishes, not bothering to look up. Takashi probably left already.

But then you hear his footsteps as he comes into the kitchen. “Hey, what’s wrong?” he asks.

You still don’t look at him. You hate how concerned he sounds. Because of course he noticed how snotty you sounded; it wasn’t subtle. And Takashi was nothing if not a mediator, so he would obviously want to talk it out. But now, even after praying for the barest scrap of his attention back, you want nothing more than for him to leave you alone. You aren’t ready for whatever sort of conversation this is going to be.

On one hand, you are still hurt by how he treated you, how he hung out with you less and less as he replaced you with Draken and Hakkai. On the other hand, you feel like you’re being nothing but a spoiled brat. Takashi doesn’t owe you anything; he’s nice, so this is probably his own way of letting you know that you were too clingy and that he needed space while trying to spare your feelings. You just don’t want to hear that out loud.

At this point, you can feel yourself getting worked up. Your own thoughts buzz in your head like a swarm of angry locusts, rattling to the ever-quickening beat of your heart in your ears. You don’t quite know if you want to cry or scream.

He’s right in front of you now; you can see his shoes sidle up next to your slipper-clad feet on the kitchen floor as you valiantly avoid eye contact.

“C’mon, talk to me,” he says, voice softening even more. Because of course he can tell you are getting more upset.

“Just go,” you say. You sound muffled in your own ears. “Go hang out with Draken, or Hakkai, or your other gang friends. I’m fine. Leave me alone.”

“I’m not leaving until you tell me what’s up.”

“Oh, now that I want you to leave me alone, you won’t.”

“Hey, what is that supposed to mean?” He sounds a little offended now, and that just makes you angrier.

You spin around to face him for the first time. You can see how his eyebrows furrow, purple eyes glistening with concern as they take in your expression.

You lose your grip on your emotions. “Oh, what does that mean? I mean you’ve been ditching me for weeks now! Every time I come around, you’re too busy, or you already have plans with someone else!” You take a deep breath, trying to rein yourself in. “Look, if you don’t want to be around me anymore, just say something. Not any of this ‘hinting’ bullshit. Just…just say something…because I honestly don’t know what’s going on, Takashi.”

Your anger burnt through you quickly, like a flashfire, and you can feel your eyes starting to water.

Takashi looks stricken. One of his hands comes up to grip yours, using it to pull you into a tight hug. It only takes one murmur of your name, spoken gently into your hair as he tucks your head underneath his chin, for you to fully break.

There are tears streaming down your face now. You start to babble. “You’re my best friend, Takashi,” you say, pitifully. “I miss you.”

You feel his arms tighten around you, until you can almost feel your bones grinding together. It kind of hurts, but you are just happy to be held. His grip loosens soon enough, and he pulls back so he can look you in the eyes.

“I fucked up.” He smiles sadly at you. “I never wanted to make you feel like that. You’re my best friend too…but I couldn’t stay like that, and I didn’t know what to do about it.”

You feel your heart drop; you don’t understand. “What’re you trying to say?”

He lets out a sigh, and then reaches to clasp both your hands in his. His eyes dart around the room, nervously, before settling back onto yours. There is a quiet intensity in them that he only has when things are serious. “I want to be more than friends. I like you…romantically. I realized it a few weeks ago…you were always so special to me, and I didn’t understand why until Draken pointed it out to me.”

He let out a light chuckle. “I treated you differently than I did everyone else because I had—have—a crush on you. I didn’t know what to do about it, so I started avoiding you. I thought I would blurt out something that would ruin our friendship. I didn’t think about how it would affect you. I’m so sorry.”

You can’t believe what you’re hearing. It seems so inconceivable that he would return your feelings. You don’t even know what to say, so you focus on the end of his short speech. “So much for being the emotionally intelligent one, huh?” you say, tone lighter than it has been this whole time.

He lets out a self-deprecating laugh, tilting his head down. “Yeah, yeah. Guess I’m better with other people’s problems than my own. But cut me some slack, this is the first time I’ve been in love with someone before.”

You freeze. “Love?”

He already told you he had a crush on you, but this brings your thoughts to a halt. Love is a much more serious claim than a simple crush.

Takashi seems to think so as well. His face shutters. It’s clear he didn’t mean to say that much, but he doesn’t back down. “Yeah. Love. But it’s okay you don’t feel the same way. I’m good with just being friends. Or whatever makes you comfortable. Um. I owe you that much after being such a shithead, huh?” He looks uncomfortable, like he is just waiting for you to reject him. Like it’s inevitable.

You give him a sharp flick on the nose. “Idiot. Who says I don’t feel the same way.”

“…You do?”

You let out a snort, fighting to keep a grin off your face. “Like I wasn’t pining after you for years. God, Takashi, I follow you like a lovesick puppy, and you didn’t catch a hint?”

You open your mouth to say something else, but you’re swept back into his arms before you can. The two of you are face to face now; from here, you get the full force of his blinding grin. He’s smiling so wide that his eyes are nothing more than crescents of purple, his pretty eyelashes nearly brushing his cheeks. He looks breathtaking.

You break out into your own smile, unable to keep the happiness off your face. You feel so light, lighter than you have in a long time. The knowledge that Takashi loves you is like a shot of dopamine straight to your brain; you feel nearly delirious from the sudden rush of happiness.

“I love you,” he says. He sounds so tender when he says it, you can’t help but tilt your head up to press a kiss to his lips. It’s nothing more than a peck, but the touch of his soft mouth against yours sends sparks through your body.

“I love you too,” you say.

He looks at you in awe, before he leans down to steal another kiss from your lips, this one longer, and deeper.

You never want to leave; you would happily spend forever standing in the middle of his kitchen, trading heartfelt kisses and basking in the warmth of your love with Takashi.

-

(Draken wonders what happened to Mitsuya; he missed their hangout without so much as a “can’t make it” text. He can only hope the other boy finally got the balls to confess his feelings to you. He loves his sworn brother, but he’s getting tired of seeing Mitsuya avoid you. And he is definitely getting tired of hearing his lovesick ramblings. Well, if the two of you haven’t gotten together by now, Draken supposes he could always go with Yuzuha’s plan to lock the both of you in a closet until you worked things out.)

[puck-luck]

congratulations on 1k!!!! you deserve it:) i am wondering if i can request 7 of diamonds w matt rempe? but if you don’t want to write for him quinners is just fine ☺️ maybe like him trying to persuade you not to go out with your girlfriends that night

i don't normally write for matt, but i had already written this prompt for quinn, so i didn't want to completely nix your request! i did what i could! i don't fw matt rempe that way, but i hope this was fine <3

warnings: no actual p in v, but matt is trying REAL hard to make it happen. over the clothes touching, a lot of sensual kisses, persuasion (begging?) from matt

wc: 592

“You have to go?” Matt groans, following you into your bedroom. You’d just finished touching up your hair for girl’s night, so now you have to do your makeup.

“You sound like Barron Trump,” you tell him. “‘I have to go to school now? Now I have to go to school?’” 

“Hardy har,” Matt says with a sarcastic and low laugh. He sticks his tongue out at you, standing behind you when you sit down at your vanity and putting his hands on your shoulders. “I can’t believe Alley got you hooked on that TikTok sound. It’s not that funny.”

“I like it,” you reply with a shrug as Matt starts to massage the area where his hands rest. “It is the only light in the darkness, Matty.”

“What time do you have to be there?” Matt asks, watching your face in the mirror. 

“Speaking of your sister, she’s picking me up in an hour.” You rub primer into your skin, the first step of your routine. Since it’s just Alley and a few of your friends that you’ve known forever, you don’t plan on going full glam today. You’ll probably just do some foundation, concealer, eye makeup, and your lips. 

“An hour?” Matt asks. “You’ve got so much time! Come lay down with me, c’mon. Please,” he drawls out, pouting at you and batting his eyelashes. “Alley won’t mind if you’re a little late.”

“I can’t always be late,” you admonish, frowning at Matt in the mirror. “That’s why I’m getting ready so early, M. So that I’m not late.”

Matt groans, exaggerated and long. “When you finish your makeup, will you come lay with me?”

You know that he’s going to keep asking, so you relent. “If I have time, I’ll come lay with you.”

Matt grins and kisses the back of your head, bending at the waist to do so. He’s so much taller than you when you’re sitting– it’s kind of hilarious. He goes to lay on the bed, sometimes scrolling on his phone and sometimes admiring you while you do your makeup. 

You finish with plenty of time, already wearing the outfit that you’d planned for tonight. You stand from the vanity and walk over to Matt, poking him on the thigh and telling him to scoot over. 

Matt does, then he rolls so that he’s halfway on top of you. He presses you into the mattress and breathes in your shampoo. He grabs his phone and lays his arm over your stomach, touching his forehead to your temple as he continues to scroll on Instagram. It isn’t long until he starts to kiss your cheek, then your jaw, then your neck. His kisses get more and more wet as he moves south, finally pulling your shirt to the side and escalating to leaving a hickey on your skin.

“Matthew,” you scold, pulling him away from the juncture of your neck and shoulder by his hair. “What are you doing?”

He groans like he’s been found out, although his actions were anything but sneaky. “Let me give you a reason to stay in bed,” he persuades, sneaking his hand under your skirt and petting over your panties. “C’mon, Alley won’t mind.”

You fix him with an unimpressed look, but he’s smiling and still touching you. 

“You know you want to,” he teases. “And I’m headed on the road soon, we can’t waste any time.” He nibbles at your neck after that and you start to laugh.

“You’ll have plenty of time with me after girl’s night, Matt.”

[justagalwhowrites]

Yearling No Outbreak AU - Ch. 2: Music

You run into Joel on a night out with friends. A continuation of the Yearling No Outbreak AU found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader from Yearling

CW: SMUT! Use of homophobic language; mild canon-typical violence; no use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ Only.

Length: 7.8k

A/N: So sorry this took me a million fucking years to write! One more chapter of these two that won't take me months, I swear. I do fully intend to finish every fic I share publicly - I don't share anything I don't have planned to the end - but sometimes, that clearly takes me a minute. Thank you for being patient with me and for still caring about these two.

AO3 | Main Masterlist | Previous Chapter

Six Months Later

“You’re going to have fun,” your sister-in-law, Amanda, said, tugging you along behind her into the bar. “You’re going to listen to music, you’re going to have some drinks, you’re going to find someone to dance with and you’re going to have fun.” 

You looked at her, skeptical. 

“I don’t need to dance with anybody to have fun,” you said. She rolled her eyes. “What? Is drinkin’ and music not fun enough for you?” 

“Drinking and music are plenty fun,” she said. “But you need to actually get out there. Seriously.” 

You rolled your eyes but followed her inside all the same, spotting your friends Marisa and Julie quickly, Julie standing up in her bar stool, her feet propped on the base of the chair so she stood above everyone else in the bar. 

“You said you were going to dress up!” Marisa said as you went in to hug her and give her a peck on the cheek. “What the fuck?” 

“I’m dressed up!” You said, defensive. 

“No you’re not,” Julie said, gesturing at you with her beer bottle. “That is not dressed up.” 

“Excuse you,” you said. “I’ll have you know that this -” you gestured to your button down shirt “was ironed today. And these jeans are clean AND my boots have never seen the inside of a barn. I’m dressed up.” 

“You have dresses,” Marisa said, her eyes narrowed. “I know you have dresses. I’ve seen you wear dresses.” 

“That’s because I was trying to fuck you,” you said, taking your seat across from her. “I only wear dresses when I’m trying to seduce someone and ain’t no one here I’m trying to jump into bed with so ain’t much point in wearing a dress now, is there?” 

“You could seduce me,” Julie said, waggling her eyebrows at you. 

“I am not going to try to get my ex-girlfriend’s girlfriend into bed,” you said, reaching out and taking Marisa’s beer from in front of her and taking a sip while ignoring her righteous indignation. You winked at her. “Sorry to disappoint.” 

“Oh I doubt you’d ever disappoint,” Julie said. 

“Jesus,” you rolled your eyes, putting Marisa’s beer back. “Alright, I need my own drink.” 

You slipped down from the barstool before anyone had a chance to fight you on it, making your way over to the bar. You ordered a beer for yourself and a rum and Diet Coke for your sister-in-law, leaning against the bar as you watched the stage hands adjust for the next performer, waiting for your drinks. 

As much as you hated to admit it, Amanda was right. You did need to get out more. 

You knew she thought you should be dating more and, if you were in her position, you’d probably agree. It had been coming on three years since your husband had died and your romantic life was pretty damn flat. You’d been out on a handful of dates and had two relationships but none of them had stuck. Marisa had been the closest, the two of you dating for a few months before, eventually, you just decided that you didn’t want to settle down again. You just weren’t ready. 

She’d understood, and you’d stayed friends. You were grateful for that, at least. A little less grateful for the fact that she seemed to be on a mission to set you up with every single woman she knew, a mission that had only picked up when she got together with Julie. It was like she thought that she couldn’t really be happy in a relationship until you were, too. But the friendship was good. She hadn’t known you before Mark had died, she wasn’t stuck in this strange place the way everyone else you knew seemed to be, walking on eggshells around the too-young widow. You needed someone who treated you like you were normal, ex-girlfriend or not. 

The bartender gave you your drinks just as the emcee took to the stage to announce the next act. 

“Next artist has been playin’ here off and on for as long as some of you kids have been alive,” he said as you made your way back to your seat. “He left us for a bit there but came back a few months ago and we couldn’t be happier to have him and his guitar on stage with us again. Please welcome Joel Miller!” 

Your jaw dropped as you watched Joel - dedicated father to the girl who had quickly become your favorite riding student and the only man since your husband who had the ability to make your heart stutter in your chest - take the stage, guitar in hand. 

“Thanks for makin’ me feel like an old man with that intro there, Matthew,” Joel said as he perched on the stool, setting the guitar in his lap before adjusting the mic. 

“What?” Amanda whispered, frowning at the look on your face as you set her drink in front of her. 

“I know him,” you whispered back, sitting beside her. “His daughter is one of my students.” 

“Think we’ll start with somethin’ most folks will know,” he said, adjusting the hold on his guitar. “Hope you enjoy it.” 

It only took you a moment to recognize the opening chords of I’m on Fire, one of your favorite Springsteen songs. But as you listened, you thought you might prefer Joel’s version, something soft and pensive and almost reflective about it, like someone looking back fondly on youthful indiscretion. You smiled softly at that, letting his music move through you, the sense that you understood him better settling in you as you took another sip of beer. Something else - something hot and wanting - settled inside you, too. 

It was an almost disconcerting sensation. When your husband died, you’d considered never dating again. You hadn’t wanted deep attachment with anybody else, you didn’t have a drive to be with anyone in that way. But eventually that shifted. You missed companionship, you missed loving someone and wanting someone, you missed having a person. So you tried but nothing seemed to stick. There was just something that felt wrong about wanting to replace Mark even though, consciously, you knew that’s not what you were doing. 

But then you met Joel. You weren’t sure why - maybe it was the context of your relationship, maybe it was the fact that he’d lost his spouse, too - but you found yourself wanting to share things with him in a way you hadn’t anyone else since your husband had died. Your friendship of sorts had grown out of that, often asking Joel and Ellie to stay for dinner after riding lessons and even going with them to a rodeo once. You liked sharing things with Joel. You weren’t sure if that scared you. 

When the song ended, everyone clapped and just as he started leaning into the mic to talk again, you cupped your hands around your mouth and hollered toward the stage. 

“Good one, Miller!” 

He frowned a little, squinting against the light and scanning the crowd until he saw you. You raised your beer to him and he smiled. 

“One of my friends is here, apparently to give me a hard time,” he said. “Know she loves her some Fleetwood Mac, so this one is for her.” 

You recognized Landslide from the first chord and you smiled, not able to help yourself, as he played. 

“He’s really good,” Amanda said. 

“He is,” you nodded, not able to take your eyes off him. 

“You like him,” she said, smile so evident in her voice that you looked over at her, just for a moment, before you scoffed and looked back at Joel. 

“We’re friends,” you said, watching him play. “Course I like him.” 

“I haven’t seen you look at a man like that since Mark,” she said. “You like him like him.”

“What are we, five?” You waved her off. “Don’t be a dumbass.”

“Only one of us here being a dumbass and it ain’t me,” she said, sounding far too self satisfied for your liking. 

You ignored her, just enjoying Joel’s set for another few songs before he finished and you clapped and whooped for him as he left the stage. 

Joel put his guitar away and came to find you, smiling almost sheepishly as he did. 

“You were amazing!” You said as he came over and stood alongside your spot at the table. “I didn’t know you played!” 

“Thank you,” he said, laughing a little. “And yeah, I love it. Thought I was gonna be a singer for a bit when I was young but that went out the window real quick. Happy I get to do this though. Somethin’ about just making something that way, you know?” 

“She does,” Amanda said before you got a chance to respond. “She plays, too.” 

“And she’s really fucking good,” Marisa cut in. “Like so fucking good.” 

“You play?” Julie swatted your arm from across the table. “Why didn’t I know that?” 

“She only plays for family,” Amanda teased. 

“Or if she’s trying to get you into bed,” Marisa added and you rolled your eyes. “What! It’s true.” 

“Alright, that’s enough of that,” you said. “Joel, this is my sister-in-law Amanda and my friends Marisa and Julie. You can ignore all of ‘em, they don’t know a damn thing.”

He laughed. 

“Good to meet you ladies,” he said as the emcee took the stage to announce the next artist. “Always wondered what this one got up to besides ridin’.” 

“Very little,” Amanda said. “Her kid’s having a cousin sleepover with mine and my husband is holding down the fort specifically so we could get her out of the damn house. We had to drag her out tonight and I’m going to need to put a gun to her head to get her to dance.” 

“Not a gun,” you said, defensive. “Just partner who is worth the trouble dancin’ with, so good luck to ya.” 

“Think I’m worth the trouble?” Joel asked and your head spun to face him so fast it almost shocked you. He seemed shocked, too, looking awkwardly at the ground and palming the back of his neck. “Just… you know. If you wanted to dance, ain’t like I got someone waiting on me. And… I’d like to dance with you.” 

You just looked at him, trying not to smile but you felt the edges of your lips tugging up, anyway. 

“Alright, cowboy,” you said, taking a sip of your beer. “I’ll dance with you.” 

Joel smiled and they announced the next performer - a younger kid, maybe college aged - took the stage and awkwardly introduced himself. 

“If he plays somethin’ worth dancing to, that is,” you added with a wink. 

Joel looked to the stage and gave the kid a wave before looking back to you. 

“Oh, he will,” Joel said. “Anyone from here ever hits it big it’ll be him, you wait.” 

You scoffed, skeptical, but you ended up eating your words, the opening strains of Layla enough to make you shut up and listen. 

“Alright, cowgirl,” Joel said with a smirk as the kid on stage started on the next song, one you recognized as Hallelujah from the opening chord. “Gonna make good on your word or not?” 

“Come on,” Amanda elbowed you playfully. “You did say you were gonna have fun!” 

“Alright!” You said, putting your hand in Joel’s outstretched one and ignoring the thrill that ran through you when your skin made contact with his. His long, thick fingers closed around yours and you hoped he couldn’t feel your heart racing in your palm. “I’m dancin’ I’m dancin’.” 

He led you to the dance floor and pulled you gently against his body, his hands finding your waist as you put your arms around his neck. 

“You really don’t have to do this, you know,” he said as he started swaying with you. “Wasn’t trying to bully you into it.” 

“You didn’t,” you assured him, smiling a little. “Just haven’t danced in a while is all. Probably could have used a little bullying, to be honest.” 

He nodded a little and you tried to ignore how his body felt against yours. It had been a long time since you’d been this close to a man. Since Mark’s death, you’d exclusively dated women. You weren’t trying to, necessarily, but you’d always been a little more comfortable with women. It was odd now, having someone big and broad against you, the makeup of his body so unlike your own. 

“So, you play?” He asked after a moment of not quite awkward silence passed between you. 

“Yeah,” you smiled a little. “I do. My brother taught me - not the one you’ve met, I got another one - and it’s my favorite thing to do besides ride. Though it might be a tie, actually.” 

“Well you know what I like to play now,” he said. “Since you were stuck listening to it…” 

“You were good!” You cut him off. “And I don’t bullshit about that, you were. Really.” 

“Still,” he said. “Tell me, what do you like to play?” 

“I mean, bit of everything,” you shrugged. “But I love Heart, the Runaways, Veruca Salt… I love a good guitar part but I love it more if a woman played it.” 

“Should tell Ellie about that sometime,” he said, smiling fondly. “Been teaching’ her to play. She’d get a kick out of hearing about woman rockers from a woman.” 

“Happy to spread the good word,” you smiled back. 

You just danced with him then, in not quite awkward silence, your faces close together. Close enough that you could smell him, the pine scent of fresh cut lumber and understated spice of cologne and something that you couldn’t place but just felt good. Safe and warm and comfortable. 

You found yourself looking in his eyes more than you’d really intended to, the sense that - in spite of the room full of people around you - it was just you and him there, swaying with the music. 

“Always liked this song,” you said eventually, looking up at Joel. 

“Hm?” 

“Hallelujah,” you said. “Always liked it.” 

“Me too,” Joel said, his eyes searching yours. “It’s… it’s beautiful. Always thought so.” 

The song ended and you just stood there in his arms, watching him as his hands slipped up your body to trace over your arms and you wanted to kiss him then, more than you’d wanted to kiss someone since Mark.

“Why don’t we pick things up a little?” The kid on stage said, pulling you out of your own head before he started playing again, the crowd whooping and hollering. You laughed and pulled your eyes from Joel’s before he took your hand - as if by habit - and led you back to the table. 

“Was that so bad?” Amanda teased as you got back to the table. 

“Oh she really hated that,” Marisa winked at you. “I could tell.” 

“I’m gonna ask both of y’all to fuck off,” you said sternly, smiling a little as you did. 

“And if we don’t?” Marisa taunted. 

“I’ll make you fuck off,” you said. 

“Oh I bet you will,” she smirked. 

“How about I get you another beer?” Joel said, before Julie had the chance to gang up on you, too. 

The kid on stage played another song - well enough that you were starting to think you needed to come to more shit like this - before taking his bow and the emcee came up to introduce the next artist just as Joel returned with your drinks.

“Our next performer is new to Austin but boy are we excited she’s here,” he said. “Give a warm welcome to Rachel Simmons!” 

Joel turned to face the stage and clap as a young woman with close cropped hair dressed a lot like you were went for the mic, her guitar in hand and a guy just behind you that you hadn’t really noticed before groaned. 

“Always gettin’ a bunch of these types around here,” he said, loud enough that everyone around you turned to look at him. “Like we need any more of that.”

“Any more of what, exactly?” Marisa asked, brows raised. 

“You know what I mean,” he said, looking between Marisa, Julie and you. 

“Baby,” Julie took Marisa’s arm. “Let’s not…”

“Afraid I don’t know what you mean,” you said, slipping down from your barstool and facing him. “Why don’t you explain it, friend?” 

“We don’t need more of that kind around here,” he said, not backing down. 

You felt it then, in the little half second of clarity you got before some form of righteous rage took over and you acted on instinct. Your blood was hot, body tensed like a coiled spring. 

“What. Kind.” 

“Probably best to step away,” Joel was at your back but - when you looked toward him, ready to fight him, too - he was speaking to the man, not to you. “Before we have a problem.” 

“See?” The man looked toward his friend. “Like I said, we don’t need any more loud mouthed dykes.” 

You threw the punch before you even paused to consider, hard enough and fast enough that the man ended up stumbling back, clutching at his face as a bubble of space formed around him, no one else wanting to get caught up in his trouble. 

“Sorry, what was that?” You stalked up to him, shoving him as he tried to right himself. He straightened but you swung again, catching him on the other cheek this time. “Don’t think I heard you right you inbred, white trash, motherfucking…”

He moved to swing back but Joel stepped between you, the man’s fist making contact with Joel’s chest and not moving him an inch. Joel shoved him back.

“Now I know you didn’t just try and punch a woman,” Joel prowled closer and you just stayed behind him, panting for breath. 

“She punched me first!” The man yelled, leaning around Joel to gesture angrily at you.

“And I’ll punch you again!” You yelled back, about to launch yourself at him but Joel put his arm out, stopping you. “Make this whole bar watch you get your sorry ass whooped by a loud mouthed…” 

“You can leave,” Joel said, cutting you off and still holding you back. “Our I will make you leave. Know the owners here don’t take too kindly to folks like you, ain’t gonna be me or her getting in trouble.” 

“C’mon man,” the asshole’s friend said, putting a palm to his chest. “Ain’t worth it.” 

He looked like he considered it for a moment and you almost wished he wouldn’t listen, that he’d throw another punch and you could beat the shit out of him. But he wiped the blood from the corner of his mouth and stepped back. 

“Don’t wanna drink at a fuckin’…” 

“Watch your words,” you said, voice dark, hand already curling into a fist. “Hate for you to get knocked out between here and the door.” 

“Don’t wanna drink here anyway,” he spat ‘here’ like it was the slur he meant and left, looking back over his shoulder at you. 

“Better fuckin’ go,” you muttered as he left and realized just how quiet the bar had become, how every eye in the place was trained on you. Your hand throbbed. 

“Well, that was somethin’,” the emcee said, the woman behind him clutching her guitar. He looked to her. “You still up for playing for us?” 

“Yeah,” she said, settling in to play. “Think we all could use a little music after that…” 

She started playing closer to fine and you flexed your fingers, trying to see if you’d broken anything. 

“Hey,” Marisa said, suddenly beside you, taking your face in her hands, her eyes searching your face. “You OK, baby?” 

“I’m fine,” you said, smiling a little, and she pulled you into a hug, holding you tight. 

“You really shouldn’t have done that,” she said. “I should have just kept my mouth shut and…” 

“And if you didn’t say anything, I would have,” you said, giving her a little squeeze before stepping back from her. “Someone needed to say something and lord knows I can’t shut the fuck up. You OK?” 

“Yeah,” she sniffed and nodded before she sighed. “I dunno, maybe we should just get out of here…” 

“No, fuck that,” Julie said, coming up and slipping an arm around Marisa’s waist and kissing her shoulder. “We are going to stay and we’re going to listen to music and we are not going to let that backwards bigot ruin date night. Got it?” 

“Got it,” Marisa smiled a little. 

“Wanna dance it out, baby?” Julie asked. 

Marisa laughed wetly. 

“Yeah,” she said. “Let’s dance it out.” 

You watched them go to the dance floor, smiling a little, before looking down at your hand, flexing your fingers again and wincing as you did. As the adrenaline started to fade, your knuckles hurt more. You must have caught him right on his chin with one of the blows, your skin split and bleeding. 

“Ow,” you said to yourself, not really out of pain but because it seemed like you should. 

“Should probably get that cleaned up,” Joel said, making you jump a little. You’d almost forgotten he was there. 

“Yeah,” you said, looking around and realizing that Marisa and Julie had dragged Amanda onto the dance floor, too. You deflated a little. “Shit, I came with Amanda, I don’t want to make her go, too…” 

“My house ain’t far,” Joel said and you looked at him, brows raised. “I mean, just… You know, I got first aid shit there, can get you patched up pretty easy. Bandaged up my kid brother’s knuckles enough times, I’m pretty much an expert.” 

“You wouldn’t mind?” You asked. 

“Course not,” he said. “Seems like the least you can do given how kind you’ve been to Ellie and me. And if anyone deserved a punch to the face it was that asshole, don’t seem right to let the person who did the punching suffer.” 

“Alright cowboy,” you smiled a little. “Let’s go.” 

He grabbed his guitar and put his hand in the middle of your back, guiding you out to his truck in the parking lot. 

“Here,” he said, and before you had a chance to do it yourself, opened the passenger side door. 

“Well ain’t you a gentleman?” You said, hopping up in the seat. 

“What can I say,” he smiled a little. “My mama raised me right.”

Joel’s truck was almost surprisingly clean. Not that he seemed like a particularly messy guy but you’d expected him to have stray receipts or a few empty water bottles lying around. Instead, the cab was almost immaculate, the truck more than a decade old but well cared for, with a dashboard that shined and clean carpets. But there were little hints of his life there, too. There was a sticky note over the radio that said “Portfolio Monday!!!” and a purple butterfly dangling from his rearview mirror. You smiled at that, reaching out and delicately tracing the outside edge of it as Joel got in the driver’s seat. 

“Didn’t take you for a butterfly guy,” you said, looking at him as he started driving. 

“Oh, yeah,” he smiled a little - a crooked one that you’d call cocky if you didn’t know any better - and chuckled. “My oldest, Sarah, made me that when she was a kid. Loved butterflies. Still does, helped her put in a little butterfly garden at her place last spring. She keeps telling me I should get rid of that but you know how it is when it’s somethin’ your kid made you. Don’t matter if it was 25 years ago, you keep it.”

You smiled a little, thinking of the misshapen vase that Savvy had made you at school for Mother’s Day when she was in second grade and how she groaned anytime you took it out of the cabinet. 

“Well, if you’re not tormenting your kids, what’s the point?” You said. 

The two of you were silent for a moment and you let yourself look at him - really look at him. He was strikingly beautiful person, with his strong jaw and aquiline nose and thick hair. There was something about looking at him that just made you feel good, like you did when you looked at an artistic masterpiece or played your favorite piece of music. 

“Thanks for stepping in back there,” you said after you texted Amanda to tell her that you’d find your own way home and a few minutes had passed. “I’m… Well, my parents always just said I was a hot head but I can get myself in trouble when I don’t reel it in so… Thank you.” 

“Course. Like I said, he deserved it,” he said, clearing his throat awkwardly. “Sorry if it’s not my place and if I’m overstepping by askin’ but… Seemed like you took what that asshole said real personal.” 

“I mean,” you shrugged. “Marisa’s my ex-girlfriend, her and Julie are my friends. Not gonna just let someone say that kind of shit about them or me. So yeah, I took it personal.” 

Joel just blinked for a second, seemingly frozen otherwise and you laughed. 

“What?” You asked. 

“Nothin’,” he said quickly. “Just… you know… you were married to a man so I thought… I mean I know not everyone… uh… comes out before they settle down but…” 

You laughed again, saving him from himself. 

“I’m bi, Joel,” you said. He looked quickly over at you and then back to the road. “That means I like men and women and everything in between or outside. Much more interested in the person than what’s in their pants.” 

Joel nodded slowly, like he was processing for a moment. 

“Probably should have thought of that,” he said. “I’m not the most… familiar with all of that. I’ve been learnin’ more ever since Ellie told me how she feels. Never had a problem with any of it, ‘course, everyone should get to love and live how they want but only knew one couple who wasn’t straight before - actually, you’d probably like Bill, he’s a hot head, too - so I just didn’t pay much attention and…” 

“Joel,” you cut him off. “I’m not offended that you thought I was straight or that you didn’t know what to do with the fact that I’m not. It’s OK.” 

He pulled into his driveway and he tried to get to your side of the truck before you opened the door yourself, frowning a little when he found you already standing. 

“Now how am I supposed to keep being a proper gentleman if you don’t let me?” He asked, small smile on his face. You just rolled your eyes but couldn’t help smiling a little in return. “C’mon, let’s get you fixed up.” 

Joel’s home felt like him, too. You moved slowly once inside, trailing along behind him as he put his keys and wallet on the small table by the door and took his guitar out of the case and set it on the stand in the living room, turning on lights as he went. It was tidy and warm, comfortably lived in and well loved and thoughtful, with wood-paneled walls and plush leather couches and paintings that were definitely more than hotel room style bullshit on the walls. 

“Here,” he said, jerking his head toward a doorway. “Kitchen’s this way. Get that rinsed and iced before anything else.” 

“Thanks,” you said, following him. The kitchen was cozy and clean, with a few pans on the drying rack and the quiet hum of the dishwasher finishing its dry cycle. There was a breakfast nook, with a gallery of family pictures on the wall behind it that you resisted the urge to go look at, instead following Joel to the sink. 

“Here,” he said, running the water and testing the temperature. “Gimme that hand of yours.” 

You held it out and he took it gently in his much larger one. He brushed his thumb below the split skin, looking you over. 

“Don’t think you broke anything,” he said, looking up from your hand to your face. “Just gonna be sore.” 

“I’ve had worse,” you smiled a little. “I do get thrown off horses for a living.” 

He chuckled a little. 

“Suppose you do.” 

He cleaned up your hand, treating you so delicately it was almost shocking. He was so large and strong - cords of muscle obvious where his shirt sleeves were rolled up to his elbows - that you knew he had to make a conscious choice to be gentle. Your heart beat a little faster with that knowledge - with the thought that he was choosing to be gentle with you. 

Joel made you an ice pack next, wrapping the Ziploc in a kitchen towel to keep the cold from being too harsh on your skin, before going to get the bandages. 

You took advantage of the time alone to look at the gallery wall, taking in each photo individually. Joel, when he was decades younger and a little girl who looked so much like Savvy on his shoulders it almost knocked the wind out of you - Sarah, you assumed. Joel with another man who looked a lot like him - his brother, you figured - and the girl who looked like Savvy on a rafting trip. Joel and a woman in a knee-length white dress holding a bouquet of flowers, his arm around her waist, a proud smile on his face. Tess, you guessed, but she looked nothing like Sarah and you suddenly felt this odd kinship with a woman you’d never met before. Joel was such a dedicated father and - from what he said of Tess and Ellie - you knew she must have been like a mother to Sarah, too, all because she chose to love someone who already had another person they loved more than anything else in the entire world. She, too, chose to step into a family that already existed and love them and look after them. You smiled, a little sadly, at her image, mourning for someone you didn’t know. 

“That’s Tess,” Joel said from behind you and you looked over your shoulder to find him there, his arms crossed over his chest, smiling a little. 

“She was beautiful,” you smiled a little in return before looking back at the wall. 

“She was,” Joel said, coming to stand alongside you. “She’d have liked you.” 

“Yeah?” You asked, looking up at him. 

“Yeah,” he said. “She was tough as fuckin’ nails, didn’t take shit from anybody. She had some corporate job that I wasn’t smart enough to understand but she had those assholes under control. Always glad I wasn’t on the wrong side of her. Well, usually wasn’t, anyway.” 

You laughed a little at that and Joel smiled wider.

“Like I said. She’d like you.” 

“That’s Sarah?” You nodded at a picture of her with a soccer trophy, smiling hugely with one of her front teeth missing. 

“That’s her,” he smiled. “My pride and joy, that kid. Her and Ellie are the best things I ever did.” 

“Does she live around here?” You asked. 

“Dallas,” he said. “Her husband got a job up that way but we get to see her about once a month or so. She’s married, got a little one of her own now - he’s about to turn two, named him Joel for some reason - and she’s the band instructor at a high school.” 

“Took after her daddy,” you smiled at him. 

He chuckled. 

“Suppose she did.” 

You followed Joel back to the sink and he cleaned the cut with alcohol, making you wince, before carefully bandaging you up. You flexed your fingers carefully, making sure the bandage was secure. 

“Thanks,” you smiled. “Think you’ve saved me from dying of infection from whatever was growing in that fucker’s beard.” 

“Probably somethin’ real nasty,” Joel smiled a little back. “Couldn’t afford to risk it.” 

You snorted, trying to ignore how warm your skin seemed because he was close to you, the way your heart fluttered. 

“We could head back to the bar,” he said. “Or… if it ain’t too weird… I got beer and…” 

“Not weird,” you cut him off. “I like beer.” 

He pulled two bottles of Shiner out of the fridge and opened them, passing you one, and you asked to see more of the house. He showed you around, putting Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers on the record player and stopping at the music room. He showed you his guitars and - when he insisted - you demonstrated some of your skills before you told him about how Mark had gotten you a dulcimer for the last birthday the two of you had shared and how you were having fun figuring out what all you could do with that instrument. There were more pictures - including one big one from a Christmas where the whole family was together and everyone looked so happy it made your heart ache. Eventually, the two of you made your way back to the living room and you stopped at a painting, one that had struck you even from afar when you first came in the house: a moose and a deer with mountains in the background. 

“Ellie painted that,” Joel said, sounding proud. 

“Really?” You said, looking over your shoulder at him before looking back at the painting. “It’s beautiful, she’s incredibly talented.” 

“She really is,” Joel agreed. 

“Have to see if she can make me somethin’ like this,” you said, leaning in even closer to it, eyes tracing over the gentle arc of the doe’s neck. “I really love the deer…” 

Joel chuckled but tried to hide it and you frowned, turning to face him. 

“What?” You asked. 

“Nothin’,” he coughed, clearing his throat. “Don’t… don’t worry about it.” 

“Clearly something,” you said. “C’mon, tell me.” 

“Well…” he looked to consider it for a moment before shaking his head and sighing a little. “You gotta promise to not hold it against me.” 

“OK now you really gotta tell me,” you smirked, setting your bottle of beer on a nearby side table and putting your hands in the back pockets of your jeans. “Spill, Miller.” 

“You may not know this about yourself,” he said, wincing a little as he said it. “But… when you get real worked up about something - excited or mad or something - your eyes get real big. You were pissed as hell when I first met you and your eyes were about the size of dinner plates and you reminded me of a deer… Bambi, to be exact.” 

“Bambi?” You laughed, raising your eyebrows. “I reminded you of Bambi. A baby deer.” 

“Only with the eyes!” He said, defensive but laughing a little, too. “But, you know… Bambi’s a lot stronger than people give him credit for. Sarah’s little boy likes that movie and that little deer survives a whole hell of a lot, fights off another deer and a bunch of hunters. Bambi’s tough. More people should be like Bambi.” 

“Bambi,” you shook your head a little, smiling. “I like it.” 

“Good,” Joel said, stepping a little closer to you. “That’s… that’s good.” 

“Yeah,” you said, and you stepped closer to him, too. Close enough that your chest brushed his when you breathed. Your eyes searched his, almost hoping to see some reluctance there but found none. “I think so, too.” 

And before you could think better of it, you kissed him. 

***

You were kissing him. 

Joel’s heart raced. 

You were kissing him. 

It was like every other thought he’d ever head just flitted right out of his mind because you were kissing him. 

He’d thought about this moment far more than he was proud of. 

Joel was struck by you the first time he saw you and it had only gotten more intense since. Seeing you befriend Ellie and help her become more and more confident on a horse, watching how you loved and cared for your animals, getting to know your biting humor and taste in music and fiery passion for so much. He had always been drawn to strong women and there you were, running your own ranch, breaking horses and beating men at their own damn game. And then you were so fucking beautiful it seemed like he could pass hours just looking at you and never get bored, just be happy for the privilege. How the hell was he not supposed to fall for you? What hope did he have? 

Until tonight, he’d resigned himself to be silent about it. His feelings were his problem, not yours. Ellie adored you and your daughter, you were the exact kind of role model he wanted for his child and he liked you - not just in that he was attracted to you but as a friend, too. Joel didn’t have many friends. He wasn’t about to put all that at risk just because he had feelings for someone for the first time since Tess died.

Then you danced with him. You danced with him and you looked in his eyes and you let him take you home and bandage your damaged knuckles and you tasted a little like mint below the hops from the beer on your tongue and he had to do something more, he had to. 

Your arms were around his neck and your body arched into his, all soft and pliant against him and he moaned into your mouth as his hands found your waist. 

You pulled away the tiniest bit then, your eyes searching his. 

“This OK?” You asked, a little breathless.

“Yeah,” Joel said, breathless, too. “Yeah, it’s… fuck, this is way more than OK.” 

You smiled at that, your eyes wide but soft. 

“Where’s Ellie?” You asked. “She gonna be home anytime soon?” 

“School trip,” Joel said. “Won’t be back until Sunday.” 

“Good,” you smiled, almost cocky, at him. “Because I still haven’t seen your bedroom, Miller.” 

“Well,” Joel said, his voice low. “Can’t have that, can we?” 

He kissed you again before leading you up the stairs to his room. 

Joel tugged at your shirt when the two of you got there and you let him untuck it from your jeans, his fingers working clumsily at the buttons as yours pulled at his belt buckle. The two of you undressed each other like teenagers would, quick and fumbling, casting clothes aside and leaving them strewn across his floor and fuck, you were beautiful. Fucking gorgeous. 

Once you were both naked, you kissed him and turned him so the backs of his legs found the end of the bed and you nudged him down onto it. 

“I…” he panted, looking up at you from his spot on the mattress. “Shit, I should’ve said somethin’ sooner but I… I don’t exactly got a condom…” 

“It’s OK,” you said, eyes wide and hungry. “Don’t need to worry about knocking me up.” 

You straddled him, the heat of your bare, slick pussy tantalizingly close to his cock. 

“Fuck,” he groaned, looking down to see where your bodies were aligned. He breathed heavy for a moment, trying to keep from losing his head but he was failing. He looked back to you. “You sure?” 

You just nodded, grinding yourself against his length, making him moan, your eyes locked on his face. 

“Goddamn,” he said, looking back down and stroking himself before you rose up on your knees, aligning your warm, soft heat with his cock. He looked up at you then, your hands on his shoulders as you lowered yourself onto him. He groaned as you took him, your tight channel stretching over him. He held your waist, watching you as he filled you totally, until every inch of him buried inside of you. “Fuck, you feel good, so fucking good.” 

You just moaned in response, looking down between your bodies to where you were joined, panting for breath. After a moment, you pushed him down onto his back and planted your hands on his chest. You looked him up and down, eyes wide and, for half a moment, he thought you looked uncertain. But, before he had the chance to ask, you started moving over him and he was lost in you. 

The rise and fall of your hips were mesmerizing and he was nearly overwhelmed by just watching the motions of your body. The way you ground yourself down against him when he was fully inside you, the way you curved and arched as you rode him, the flex of your muscles and the stretch of your skin and the bounce of your breasts, he couldn’t seem to even wrap his mind around the idea that there was anything that existed outside of you and him together. 

It didn’t take long that just watching wasn’t enough, he needed to be able to touch and feel you. He sat up and you let him, your arms going around his neck as his hands ranged over the soft, smooth skin of your back, one rooting at the base of your spine to hold you in place as he fucked up into you and your hips stuttered as you groaned, his mouth against your neck. 

“Fuck, Joel,” he could feel the movement of your throat against his lips when you spoke, the flutter of your pulse below your skin. “I’m gonna come, you’re gonna make me come, I…” 

“Do it,” he damn near growled it, digging his fingers into your skin as he pressed himself deeper, harder. “Make yourself come on my cock, that’s it, fuck!” 

Your pussy clenched tight on him for a moment before throbbing around his length and he looked up at you - your eyes so wide, your pupils blown - before he kissed you, hard and needy, your legs locked tight around him. 

He took advantage of you being lost in orgasm to adjust you, moving you so you were on your back on the bed and he was between your thighs and fucking down into you as your orgasm eased. Joel looked down over you, memorizing your naked body - the shape of your breasts and curve of your hips and the scars he was sure came from years of ranching - before you rolled your hips up against him, your hand finding the curls at the nape of his neck and he groaned. 

“Think you might be tryin’ to kill me, woman,” he said and you smirked. 

“Know what they say,” you said. “Save a horse, ride a cowgirl. You gonna ride me or not?” 

“Depends,” he said, heart pounding in his chest. “Think you can gimme another one?” 

He ground himself against you deep inside, his body working your clit as he did and you groaned, eyes rolling back in pleasure. 

“Atta girl,” he smirked a little. “Gonna take that as a yes.” 

Before you had a chance to respond, he started fucking into you again, hard and fast and finding the place in you that made your thighs grip him tighter and your nails dig into his skin. He kissed and sucked his way over your chest, cupping the soft fullness of your breasts and pulling your nipples into his mouth as the skin pebbled below his tongue. You met him stroke for stroke as he moved, your hands pulling him close and tight until he couldn’t have his mouth on your chest anymore and instead he kissed over your jaw to the soft skin below your earlobe, down to your throat. Your channel tightened around him, your breaths coming in fast and needy pants and he was struggling to hold off his own orgasm as yours drew closer and closer to the surface. You were overwhelming. Just being inside someone again would be overwhelming but the fact that it was you - the first person he’d had any kind of feelings for in what felt like a small eternity - just made it worse. 

“Fuck, you gettin’ close there baby?” He panted in your ear, voice barely even a whisper. You let out a strangled moan, your hips stuttering against him. His hand ran down your body to grab your ass, adjusting the angle of you and you damn near sobbed, back arching below him. “S’right, C’mon. Come for me, just let go and come.” 

Your fingers wound in his hair and you pulled him from where he’d buried himself in your neck and looked in his eyes for a moment before you kissed him, pulling his mouth to yours harshly as you thrust your hips up against him one last time, your channel so impossibly tight around him it almost hurt before you throbbed around him, your body milking his and he couldn’t hold back anymore as he came deep inside you. He came so hard it made his head hurt, like something reached into the very center of him to take everything he had and empty it into you, rope after rope of his spend pumping into you. 

You went limp below him half a moment before he collapsed, breathless, on top of you. His mind was fuzzy and it took him a second to come back into himself enough to be aware of his weight on you. 

“Sorry,” he managed, lifting himself from you shakily before slowly, gently slipping out of you. “Not tryin’ to crush you.” 

“S’OK,” you said, laughing a little as you panted. Joel fell onto the bed beside you and looked over at you as you stared up at his ceiling. “Fuck, feels like I need a cigarette after that and I ain’t smoked since I started living with Savvy.” 

“Take that as a compliment,” Joel smiled a little and you turned your head to look at him. You smiled back. 

“Good,” you said. “You should.” 

Joel tried to remember how this was supposed to work now - hell, what the fuck was the etiquette for unexpected sex in this damn decade? - but he got up and got you a glass of water and something to clean up with and there was something centering about you drifting off to sleep beside him even though he was pretty sure you hadn’t intended to. He liked having you there, liked that you felt comfortable enough with him to pass out naked in his bed. There was something good and right about having you close like this and he drifted off watching you breathe and trying to figure out how to talk to you about this in the morning, something warm blooming in his chest that he hadn’t felt in so long. 

Which was why it felt like shit to find you gone and his bed cold and empty when he woke. 

A/N: Joel is still Joel and Bambi is still Bambi! But I've had a lot of fun writing about them in a world where they're not so deeply traumatized and instead are both grieving very similar losses. I just love them! Thank you for being here. Love you!

[thoughtfulfiction]

Hike of a Lifetime

Author’s Note: Set in the 2022 offseason after Justin’s labrum surgery in January 2023. Rewriting my first Justin fic is a full circle moment for me so I hope you like this one!

The last two hours of your life had been spent going over orders of Gatorade protein shakes, protein pack quick bites that usually contained some sort of cheese and sausage, various brands of Greek yogurt, apples, bananas, blueberries, granola bars and anything else you could think of to stock the weight room with while you were on vacation. You had been the head nutritionist for the UCLA men's basketball team for the last year, making customized, ever changing meal plans and consulting with the health care staff to enhance your athlete's performance to the best of your ability.

After the team's loss to Gonzaga in the NCAA tournament known as March Madness, you ran to Eugene, Oregon at the first opportunity you had to go see your sister Chloe. March up until this point was one busy day after another, truly living up to the name. Most days you didn't even feel like you got to sit down for more than 10 minutes at a time due to the constant travel and meetings you had to attend. So you took a week off and as soon as you closed your laptop today, you were going to enjoy being one with nature.

Chloe had moved to Eugene two years before you got your LA job, working as a team photographer for the University of Oregon's football team, allowing the two of you to see each other during conference play more often, which had done wonders for your relationship. It's one thing to be siblings but you could genuinely call her a friend now, which was both weird to say aloud, and nice.

"Do you want the good news or the bad news first?" Chloe steps into the living room, breaking you out of your vigorous typing. You look up and groan at the guilty look on her face. That was definitely an I have a work emergency and I’m going to be leaving you, look.

"No. You're not canceling on me. I got here two days ago and I have yet to really be outside. How am I supposed to enjoy some of the most beautiful scenery of my life if I'm stuck at the house the whole time? Does spring ball even matter anyway?"

Chloe laughs, heading into the kitchen to grab a snack. You'd recently lectured her about how although cereal is a grain, she can't consider it a food group and she needs to introduce more of a balanced variety in her diet. Unless she enjoys her daily 4pm sugar crash. She surprises you by pulling out a bowl of overnight oats from the fridge, with strawberries on top. After giving her your nod of approval, she gets back to the issue at hand. "Yes, spring ball matters. But I promise you it will not take me that long, I'll be back before you know it."

You huff out a breath, trying to come up with a solution. "What if you have one of your interns do it? Mine are really holding down the fort this week, I'm obviously working from home to help them out a little and I think you should do the same."

"Well our jobs are a little different. I can give them things to edit and post but I don't want to have to approve every single one of their photos and make sure they're featuring the right position groups and players based on a schedule that I created in my head. It'll just be easier if I'm there to walk them through it and then I can come home and we'll have a relaxing week until you have to be back in messy Hollywood."

"It's just Los Angeles, not Hollywood, genius. I still work at a university just like you do," you laugh at her exaggerated version of the place you now call home.

She rolls her eyes, stepping away from her food to grab her keys. "Same difference. It's all polluted air and earthquakes anyway."

Finally finished with your task, you stand up to snatch the keys out of her hand and lead the way to the garage. "Whatever, I'm in clean air now and would really like to be able to experience it. So I'll be dropping you off and getting to my hike."

You get out of the car and the sun immediately hits your skin, not in a way that’s intense but rejuvenating, bringing you back to life. The scent of early spring, mixed in with the sweet smell of freshly bloomed rhododendron sparks a further revival. The air really is different here. Life is more…undisturbed.

Families are getting out of their vehicles without a crushing sense of urgency that you’re used to, people are laughing and enjoying each other’s company and you’ve been to this park before so you feel somewhat comfortable navigating the terrain on your own, opting to quiet the sounds of the world by listening to a podcast during your leisurely stroll. Without even making it a mile on the trail, you spot a friendly black dog making his way over to you, nudging your leg with his wet nose, essentially demanding that you pet him. You usually probably wouldn’t have but the serene energy of the space you’re in brings it out of you.

“Well hello there, buddy. Who do you belong to?” You bent down to search for a name on his collar. “Dylan, that’s a cute name. Should we go find who you came here with before someone has a heart attack?” You laughed softly as the dog happily panted away and let you grab onto the leash. Before you could even take a step, you heard a booming voice calling out the dog’s name.

The distressed figure comes into view and lets out a sigh of relief. “Oh my gosh, thank you so much for grabbing him. I’m so sorry if he’s bothering you, I bent down to tie my shoe and this guy decided to make a break for it.”

“He’s taking advantage of the fact that you only have one good arm.” You point out, remembering the shoulder surgery announcement you saw in the LA Times. The man was probably getting used to having both arms again. “No worries, he’s sweet. And super friendly.” You handed him the leash and he thanked you again.

“I seriously owe you, my mom would’ve killed me if I lost our dog when I just got home.” He chuckles nervously. God his laugh was cute. “I’m sorry, I never got your name. I’m Justin.”

“I know.” You smile. “It’s nice to meet you though, I’m y/n. Hope you enjoy the rest of your hike.” You grabbed your AirPods and went to place them back in your ears to finish getting lost in your own little world once again before he stops you.

“Wait—maybe we could finish out the hike…together? You know, just so Dylan doesn’t take advantage of me again.” Maybe he was just being cautious because there was no way he was flirting with you…right?

Those green eyes were going to get you in trouble and you knew it. But you were on a beautiful scenic getaway and hiking with Justin Herbert wasn’t going to come around every single day.

“Let’s do it. Wouldn’t want you to hurt your shoulder even more chasing after Dylan. Bolt nation might collectively collapse if anything happens to you so I’m calling this a public service.”

He unsuccessfully tries to stifle a laugh. “What a Good Samaritan you are.”

Justin was funny. And sweet. And the most fun company you’ve had in a while. You talked about your job, the entire NCAA tournament and what you both thought about being in LA. Even though you both lived very different lives, it was filled with sports and schedules and meetings and practices and there were a lot of things to bond over. Before you knew it you’d been out there for three hours and Rachel texted you to let you know she was done and ready to resume your sisterly activities. He took a look at your deflated expression.

“Do you need to head out?”

“Yeah, unfortunately.” You whispered. “This was fun though.”

He readjusts the hat on his head. “Yeah this was great. Um, I meant what I said earlier though. I owe you.” He gestures towards the phone in your hands and you hand it to him watching him type in his number, texting himself immediately so he has yours.

“Maybe we could grab dinner or something before you head back to LA?” He states pensively, holding his breath a bit until you answer.

“Yeah, I’d like that.”

The two of you head back to the parking lot and you give Dylan one more pat on the head. You look up to meet Justin’s gaze, shy smiles painting both of your faces. He walked you all the way to your car and waved goodbye as you drove away to meet Rachel.

While you waited all you could do was stare at your phone, Justin had given you his number and you had his. He’d put his actual contact information in your phone AND had asked you to go to dinner. None of this felt like real life, what kind of person stumbles upon an NFL quarterback on a normal hike?

“Why are you smiling like that? It scares me.” Chloe interrupts your thoughts. You hadn’t even realized she opened the door and got in the car. “Did that hike change your life or something?” She finished with a dry laugh.

“I’m not sure, but I think it may have…”

Rachel nods her head slowly, desperately hoping to understand what’s going on. “Yeah okay whatever. Let’s get some lunch because I am absolutely starving.”

You put the car in drive, your phone notifying you of a text from its spot on the dashboard car mount. Rachel grabs it and asks, “who the hell is Justin and why is he asking if you’re free tomorrow night?”

“Just some guy I met while hiking, no big deal,” you tried and failed to be nonchalant. She knew you way better than that.

“If it’s really no big deal then tell that to the gigantic smile on your face. You’re going on that date. I’m texting him back to let him know you’ll be free.”

All that Chloe knows is his name. The rest of it you decide to keep to yourself not only to respect his privacy but you want to keep this special thing for you and only you. In case this doesn’t go anywhere, you’ll always have the memory of today and whatever happens on Friday to look back on fondly. And by telling your sister you’re putting a little bit more pressure on it, like this has to become something. You don’t really know this guy yet, only the small tidbits that he shared on the walk and that his family dog’s name is Dylan, who would run away with any stranger if enough treats were offered.

There are so many things going through your mind as you change your outfit for the fourth time tonight. What if he thinks you’re boring? Or he’s boring? What happens if the two of you run out of things to say and you’re just sitting in the restaurant in awkward silence until someone decides to call it a night? Even worse, what if this is the best date you ever go on, you fall for him and then never hear from him again because he’s an NFL quarterback and you sometimes spend three hours a day planning out breakfast options for 18-22 year old basketball players.

You glanced in the mirror, slinging a tiny black purse over your shoulder with a subtle smirk on the way out the door at your final clothing choice. Chloe mentioned that the car outside being a super nice Porsche and you made something up about thinking that he worked in finance or a job closely related to that so she wouldn't keep digging for more information. All she followed up with was "have fun and be safe."

Ambrosia's staff walked you and Justin into the restaurant by the back entrance into a private room, which was the most abnormal part of the night. The rest of the evening was spent consuming seafood stuffed mushrooms, pasta and sharing a classic tiramisu, the best one you'd ever had in your life.

The nerves that once seeped through every pore were quickly replaced with what a vacation was supposed to feel like. Conversation flowed easily, there was no pressure to be perfect or funny or overly sexy. Justin was so…normal. He was pretty, not in a way that was intimidating because you really weren’t sure he realized how attractive he actually is. But pretty in a sense that everything about him made him more attractive. His ability to actively listen to the words you say and bring them back up when it’s relevant. The way his dimples are more pronounced when he laughs. The way he stops mid conversation to say thank you to the service staff every time they refill his water. There wasn’t a bone in his body that wasn’t filled with humility and kindness. Everything he did was gentle. And on top of all of that he paid without hesitation.This date truly had been a breath of fresh air.

“Thank you for tonight, I had a lot of fun.”

His lips curl into a smile, “this was probably the best first date I’ve had.” He doesn’t know why he’s just admitted that to you, but he’s glad it’s out there now.

“Me too,” you stand up out of your chair after he does, a collection of butterflies appearing in your stomach when he places a hand on the small of your back, before encasing his hand with yours to lead you out of the restaurant.

“When are you heading back to LA?” He asks. You only know that because you’re reading his lips and not listening to a word he’s saying. You really want to kiss him.

You hesitate to lean in, bringing your focus back to his eyes, meeting his soft gaze. “I’ll be here for a couple more days, then it’s back to work. What about you?”

“Tomorrow…” he begins, slowly losing his train of thought when a little bit of the light goes out in your eyes. Should he kiss you before he leaves in the morning or wait until you’re both back in California with busy schedules and no clue if and when you’ll see each other again? “…I don’t want to leave now due to some unforeseen circumstances,” he laughs, “unfortunately I’ve got some stuff to take care of. But I’ll call you and we can maybe do this again?”

“Yeah. Definitely. I’ll see you around.” He gave you a warm hug on the way out and you watched him walk away to his car, smiling to yourself at the thought of a second date. You couldn’t wait for that phone call.

Two weeks later...he still hasn’t called. You would’ve been surprised had you not prepared yourself for this very scenario. Even with all of this so-called “preparation,” the radio silence from him still stung. Who would’ve thought this would happen? The NFL quarterback is busy with his offseason recovery while the girl he went on one singular date with continues to replay minute by minute interactions they had. No one could’ve seen this coming. The thought of that date feels like so long ago and the fact that you can remember it in vivid detail is a feels a little humiliating. You can’t even look at an Apple Watch without your stomach ending up in knots.

You've closed your office door today, taking a few hours to yourself in between meetings. Earlier in the day you and the rest of the staff had to sit through a Tyr presentation, listening to the representatives of the brand try to sell you their endurance sports drink and leaving you with some samples. Then you had CLIF come in with some new energy chew flavor samples for the guys to try. All of the boxes of products now sat in your office and you really hoped to spend the rest of the day going through the food budget, managing receipts and preparing for your first year presentations for when the new freshman arrived sometime in June. You were glancing back and forth between Whole Foods receipts and Amazon orders when your phone rang. Too busy and in the middle of crunching numbers, you ignored the call. Then it started ringing again. You stop what you're doing, assuming that if someone is calling you twice in a row, it must be urgent. The contact name flashing on the screen has you frozen in time.

It was Justin.

Even though you've been alone in your office for a while, you look around to make sure you're not making this up and this is actually happening. He's calling you. Finally.

"Hello? Who is this?" You can hear him shuffling around, probably walking around in a circle aimlessly just like you are. Despite your best efforts to seem unfazed.

"I deserve that," he cringes. "I'm so sorry for not calling you sooner."

"What—what made you call me now?"

He can tell your voice is softer than when you first answered, and he missed hearing it. "Um...life got a little ahead of me and that's not an excuse. I just—didn't want you to think that I wasn't ever going to call," he pauses, "can I make you dinner? Tonight? If you're free. And we can talk in person."

You look at the door with a sigh, contemplating your entire existence. And then you think...fuck it. "Yeah sure, I'm free tonight. Text me your address and I'll be there around 7?"

"Seven works, I'll see you tonight."

His house is perfectly spotless. There is just no way that a single adult man in his 20s is naturally this organized and clean. Even the cat, who he introduces to you as Nova, a gorgeous Bengal walks around like she owns the place, greeting you briefly (sizing you up) before trotting away without a second glance. Justin walks you into the kitchen where he's in the middle of plating the meal. He just looked good doing normal things, filling glasses of water, opening and closing the fridge, taking off his apron. You really needed to get a grip. "It smells great in here chef, what's on the menu?"

He laughs a little, presenting his dish like he's the star of a Food Network show. "Tonight I've made for you a Traeger filet mignon seasoned with the Traeger seasoning and chimichurri sauce with a side of roasted garlic mashed potatoes and asparagus."

You happily clap for his A+ presentation and he gives you a bow. "Justin, this looks amazing! I can't wait to dig in."

The man leads you to the table, setting the plate down in front of you before grabbing a seat right next to you. "So...let me explain."

Taking a bite of your food, you shake your head. "You really don't have to explain yourself, we went on one date. There's nothing to explain I mean—”

"Yeah there is. I want you to know that I wanted to call sooner, I really did. But I came back and had to meet with doctors to make sure my recovery was on track and then the draft happened and then I had to talk about the future of my contract and I didn't want the craziness of my life to overshadow what we have going on. The last thing I wanted was for you to feel like you're being put on the backburner."

Unbeknownst to you, he had also been replaying that date...more often that he'd like to admit. Anytime he had a minute to himself he thought about calling, seeing what you're doing. And then there was a meeting, or a draft party or someone needing him to be somewhere. But you were always on his mind and he was glad to now have life slow down a little bit to show you he really did care.

"I get it. Definitely thought you forgot about me there for a second. A few seconds," you correct yourself. "But I knew you were busy and we're here now so you're forgiven. Especially because this steak is incredible."

"Well thank you," he smiles sheepishly.

He begged you not to help him clean up but you insisted. After everything was put away he gave you a tour of the place and then you sat on the couch looking for a movie to watch until the stack of puzzles on the shelf caught your eye.

"You haven't unwrapped this one. Is it new?" You note the plastic wrap lining the box on the shelf meeting you at eye level. The flowers look familiar but you can't exactly remember where you've seen them before.

“There's a lot of flowers at the park we met. Any rhododendron I see now," he nods at the box in your hand, "makes me think of you. So I bought this. Figured we could do it together.” The way he's looking at you when you turn around makes you feel warm and tingly inside.

Something about being with him is addicting. You feel physically drawn to him, this pull, an invisible hold that he has on your heart that soon makes you want to run for the hills. But you know that the second you’re away from him it’ll feel like an important new part of your life has been ripped away. It almost felt like the universe had sent Justin to you as an apology for all men. Even doing something as simple as a puzzle feels like the most romantic thing in the world. All of the pieces are laid out on the table and you tackle the corners first, working from the outside in. You're sitting so close to each other that your arms are touching, reaching and grabbing at the puzzle pieces in sync like a well oiled machine. He pulls you into his lap toward the end when there's a few pieces left, giving you a high five when all 300 pieces are in their rightful place. Your hand is in his once again, like it belongs there, holding you close and steady.

He lets you go momentarily to cup your face, a look of adoration adorning his that makes your chest clench. “I’ve been thinking about kissing you for the last 22 days," Justin whispers, his face so close to yours you can feel his breath on your lips.

"Then why are you still waiting?" You whisper back, barely able to finish your sentence because he's nipping at your bottom lip, teasing you slightly as he runs his thumb across your jaw. You're a puddle in his hands, his lips on yours kissing you with his heart pounding against his chest like he's never kissed anyone before. The kiss is so simple yet the most intense experience either of you have been a part of and you want more. Both of you are fighting for dominance, a somewhat rough dance of tongues and a little bit of teeth increasing in intensity the longer the kiss lasts. You moan into his mouth, feeling him begin to stand at attention underneath you, deepening the kiss by pulling him in even closer by his hair. The other hand is wrapped around his thigh, squeezing his leg and producing goosebumps across his entire body. He had to take a few moments to recover, slightly out of breath at the kiss that he was convinced had just changed his life. "Was that worth the 22 day wait?" You ask with a laugh, holding his head in your hands.

He nods, still incapable of speech, blowing out a breath of relief when the tightness in his pants continues to go down. You lazily make out throughout the entirety of whatever movie he puts on, more than making up for lost time.

You have to be at the facility early for morning workouts so Justin walks you out to your car, pulling you in for one more kiss. "Text me when you get home so I know you made it safe?"

"I will."

Justin lays in bed that night looking at your goodnight text, already planning the third date in his head because he needs to somehow make it better than tonight was. He doesn't have any ideas yet, he just knows he can't get enough of you.

One year later...

You were back in Eugene at your favorite park, ready to get back to your favorite scenery.

"Are you excited?" You ask Dylan, who barks excitedly as you hold onto his leash. That must mean yes.

Justin laughs beside you, grabbing onto your hand. "You ready?" He gives you a kiss on the forehead before the three of you begin your hike.

[woso-dreamzzz]

Escape

Bruna Vilamala x Eriksson!Reader

Summary: You need an escape plan

"Oof! Frido! Get off!"

Your sister's friend came crashing into you the moment the whistle blew. You couldn't quite keep your balance and tumbled to the ground, bringing Frido down with you.

"Off!"

"Never!" She declared, ruffling your hair as you tried to scramble away.

It was a healthy defeat for Wolfsburg against Barcelona - one that you had predicted when you woke up that moment - but it still didn't mean that you weren't a bit annoyed.

"Come on! I'm not a baby!"

"You're such a baby! Little baby Eriksson at Wolfsburg!"

"I hate you!"

"No, you don't!"

You finally escaped her, only to run straight into Ingrid, who took you to the ground as well.

You sent a look to Lena, who tried to scamper off as well but was caught by Frido and tugged to the floor too.

"Look at these little babies!" Frido cajoled," Trying to get away without getting hugs from us. Honestly, Ingrid, the youth these days."

"Oh, yeah," You said sarcastically," Because you two are such old hags."

"Hey, watch it." She waved a teasing finger in your face. "Or I'll tell you sister that you're bullying me."

"You'll get no sympathy from her."

You managed to flip Ingrid onto her back and immediately tackled Frido to the ground. The momentary distraction from both of them allowed you and Lena to make your escape, sprinting across the field through the sea of Wolfsburg and Barcelona girls so Frido and Ingrid couldn't find you.

"Come on," Lena tugged you through the crowd," They're going to find us!"

She was right, of course. You could just make out Ingrid and Frido making their way through the group, temporarily waylaid by greeting their old teammates.

"There's nowhere to go," You answered, scrambling to find somewhere to hide.

This happened every time you faced either of them. The tackling to the ground which was usually followed by being thrown over their shoulders and carted around like a prize.

Frankly, it was humiliating.

Even more so when your sister texted you the videos that surfaced online about it.

You were adamant about not letting Magda have more blackmail material on you - especially now that you and her played in the same country.

As you and Lena put your heads together to scheme, a throat cleared behind you.

Originally thinking it was Frido, you jumped a foot into the air and whipped around, hands already up to defend yourself.

But, thankfully, it wasn't.

"Oh," You said, trying to calm your beating heart," Hello."

Jana Fernández and Bruna Vilamala stood just in front of you. Both had played today, looking a bit sweaty and red in their Barcelona jerseys.

Vilamala, in particular, seemed incredibly red, eyes wide when you caught them.

"Hola," Jana said, nudging Bruna in the stomach and pointedly jerking her head towards you.

"H-Hola," Bruna finally said," Er...I was...Would you..."

"Bruna wants your shirt," Jana cut in," She thinks you're super cool."

The words caught you off guard and you felt your face heat up. "Oh..." You caught Bruna's eyes again. "I think you're pretty cool too."

Lena snickered behind you and you stamped on her foot.

"We've got to go," She hissed at you, tugging on your arm," Frido and Ingrid'll find us soon."

You rolled your eyes. "Shut up, Lena," You said through gritted teeth," Don't ruin this for me." You took a bold step forward, towards Bruna and stripped your shirt. You made a point of flexing as you did so, accentuating your muscles and smirking at her.

You held it out to her - noting the way she fought to keep her eyes above your shoulders. "You know," You took another step forward," This is usually the part where you give me your shirt too. But, if you want me just in my bra, I'm happy to accommodate. It's just, I've got to escape Frido and Ingrid soon and I don't want to flash anyone when I start running."

"Oh, er, yeah." She hurriedly stripped her shirt and you pulled it on, spying Frido just breaking through the crowd.

"We've got to go!" Lena insisted, slowly backing away.

"I think it suits me," You ignored her, speaking straight at Bruna who looked like a deer in headlights," I think it'd suit you to have my name on your back too."

Her blush got deeper and her tongue darted out to wet her dry lips.

"Tell you what," You said," You help me escape Frido and Ingrid and I'll come and find you later. I know this excellent restaurant nearby. I'd love to take you out to dinner."

Ingrid joined Frido at the edge of the crowd.

You pressed a kiss to Bruna's warm cheek and winked.

"Make your decision, Vilamala, 'cause I've really got to go."

[universefcb]

Marc Bernal x Reade girl

Sy: You are Pau Cubarsí's sister and he is in love with you.

a/n: Really small just so you don't miss me.

He had known you forever. You had grown up among the Barcelona players, always following Pau. To Marc, you were more than just his best friend’s sister. You were the girl who made his heart race with just one look.

But he never had the courage to tell you. Out of fear. Out of insecurity. Because he didn't know if you felt the same way.

And now, looking across the field after training, I see you talking to Héctor Fort. Very close, too close.

Héctor laughed at something you said, leaning slightly towards you. The way your eyes sparkled, the way your hand touched his arm for a few brief seconds… every detail made Marc’s stomach turn.

A hot wave of jealousy washed over him. He had no right to feel that way, because he never had the courage to tell you how he felt.

But it hurt.

Marc swallowed and looked away, clenching his fists.

“Hey, are you okay?” Pau’s voice sounded beside him.

Marc took a second to respond.

“Yeah… I’m just tired.”

Pau looked at him with a mixture of confusion and suspicion, but didn't press the issue. Marc wanted to get away from there, forget what he saw, but fate had other plans.

Because, at that moment, he heard her voice calling him.

“Marc!”

He held his breath before turning around.

"What it was?" he tried to sound normal, but his voice betrayed him a little.

He smiled and walked closer, leaving Héctor behind.

“I was asking Héctor if he thought he should cut his hair shorter. What do you think?” you joked, lightly touching his hair.

Marc swallowed hard.

“And… and why does that matter?”

He laughed, that laugh that always moved him.

“Because I like it that way,” she said in an amused tone.

But for Marc, it meant so much more.

He looked at you, at the way your eyes were looking at him curiously, and he realized something.

If I didn't say it now, I might never get it.

He took a deep breath, feeling his heart hammer against his chest.

— Y/n… I need to talk to you.

Her smile faded a little, but not in a negative way. She noticed the seriousness in his gaze and nodded.

“Sure. About what?” Marc looked around, feeling nervousness rise in his body. Héctor was still nearby. Pau, too.

He sighed.

“Can… can we go somewhere quieter?”

“Of course.” His gaze softened.

You walked away to a quieter corner of the training center. Marc rubbed the back of his neck, taking deep breaths once, twice, three times before finally finding the courage to speak.

“I…” he began, but the words seemed to get stuck.

He closed his eyes for a moment, gathering his strength. When he looked back at her, he decided to simply say what had been inside him for so long.

“I like you. I have for a long time.”

Your eyes widened slightly, but you didn't look shocked in a bad way.

“I never had the courage to tell you before, but… when I saw you with Héctor today, I realized I didn’t want to keep this to myself anymore,” he continued, feeling his heart race. “If you don’t feel the same way, I understand, I just needed to say it.

The silence between you seemed to last an eternity.

Until… you smiled.

A sincere smile.

“You really are an idiot, Bernal,” he said, shaking his head.

His heart sank. But before he could panic, he continued:

“Because I like you too” The world seemed to stop.

“Y-you… what?”

She laughed, lightly touching his hand.

“I was talking to Héctor about you. About how absent-minded he is to realize that I’ve liked you for a while now.

Marc blinked, completely stunned.

"Serious?"

"Serious."

He didn't know what to do. His heart was beating so hard he was afraid it would explode.

And then, he took the initiative.

Gently, you brought your hands to his face and moved closer.

Marc couldn't think of anything else but you when your lips touched his. It was a soft, shy kiss, but full of everything he always wanted to say and never could.

When they pulled away, he was still in shock.

“Wow…” was all he could say.

She smiled, lacing her fingers through his.

“Now you don’t need to be afraid to tell me how you feel.”

Marc smiled, finally relaxing.

Because, for the first time, he felt completely safe.

[evangelical04]

A Single Daffodil || 2

Summary: Getting arranged to be married to your long-time crush wasn't exactly the fairy tale romance you were hoping for. Nor is the dynamic of the marriage, with your husband treating you like you don't exist. But you're going to make this work, whether he cares about you or not. And he definitely doesn't...right?

Pairing: Min Yoongi x Reader

Rating: 18+ minors DNI

Word Count: 9.1K

Genre: angst, romance, unrequited love, smut, enemies to lovers, arranged marriage au, businessman yoongi

Warnings: parental trauma, sibling trauma, toxic parents, unrequited love, explicit language, alcohol usage, yoongi's kind of mean, future smut

Author's Note: hi everyone! it's currently exactly 2am for me lol but I wanted to get this chapter out today! i was hoping to having the wedding happen but I like it more for the next chapter. all the support has been so overwhelming and amazing, thank you guys so much for all the love!! i appreciate it so much and I'm grateful that you all are so supportive, especially for my first ever fic. i really hope you guys enjoy this chapter! also, just let me know if you want to be added or removed from the taglist!

Taglist:

@yoongisducky @kam9404 @sumzysworld @tarahardcore @viankiss @babystarcandylovejk @ktownshizzle @futuristicenemychaos @igot7fairlyoddparents @baechugff @pb89nv @peachytokki @ratherbfangirling

previous / masterlist / next

You could feel your eyes glazing over with the amount of time you’d spent staring at your computer screen. A quick glance at the clock showed that only a couple hours had passed since you’d arrived at work, and a devastating thirty minutes remained until your lunch break. Rubbing at your tired eyes, you tried to find the energy to resume reviewing the materials your team had sent you, but you came up short. 

The wedding planning had been taking a lot out of you the past couple of months, even though your mother wasn’t letting you decide anything for it anyway. She had been quite clear that all you had to do was show up and that your input wouldn’t be needed. You couldn’t honestly say you had an issue with that, this didn’t feel like your wedding anyway. If it were yours, you would’ve been getting married to someone you love, and crucially, someone who loves you in return.

But that wasn’t in the cards for you and you knew that well, so you went along with your mother’s planning placidly, agreeing to almost everything she mentioned and getting ignored on things you didn’t. It left you exhausted, both physically and emotionally. It felt like an out-of-body experience every time your mother pulled you into another appointment for your dress fittings or makeup and hair test runs. You could feel yourself simply going through the motions and just waiting until the appointment was done so you could return to your mundane life. 

Not much else had changed, honestly. You were still working, hanging out with your friends on occasion, reading in bed, and watching television in the evenings. The only thing looming over you was the date of the wedding, now only six months away. It felt like an omen, always hovering near you, spiking your heart rate, and making you sweat. 

Even your team had noticed your heightened anxiety and expressed their worries to you, especially the youngest, Choi Song Ha. She was a cute, young thing, a fresh face in the industry that you had quickly taken under your wing once you had set eyes on her in the new recruit orientation you visited just over a year ago now. You knew just how quickly the gaming industry ate up and spat out women like clockwork and you didn’t want the same fate for her, so you’d snatched her up into your team. She truly felt like the little sister you’d never had and your bond quickly grew over the months since you’d met. She had picked up on your dampened mood and resolved to leave you small treats of a chip bag or chocolates on your desk every other day or so as a means to cheer you up. She knew you well enough to know you wouldn’t appreciate outright signs of concern or making a scene at work, and you loved her for it. 

She had left you a small red ginseng jelly this morning with a doodle of a grumpy cat stuck to it on a post-it note. It made you smile every time you glanced at it.

It kind of reminded you of Yoongi. The two of you hadn’t talked since that night in the restaurant, and you weren’t sure if you even wanted to talk to him. Your mother had given you his number and you’d saved it, but you hadn’t made any move to message him.

“Team leader?”

You turned, snapping out of your daze to face another one of your team members, Yeonsik. 

“Yes, Yeonsik,” you responded, trying to appear calm and collected, and not like you were just thinking about your soon-to-be husband who hates you.

“We have the materials from the character graphics department for Plan C ready, it’s in your inbox now. They said that they’re ready to make any changes you want, but they’re worried about the deadline for the second draft,” Yeonsik rambled. He was a nice man, only a few years younger than you, and quite passionate about his job since joining your team two years back, just after you’d become the team lead of Planning Group 1. He had a handsome face with longer, dark hair and bright eyes that were eager to please.

“Okay, thanks for letting me know. Also, good job on keeping Graphics 2 on track, I know they’ve been giving us a hard time with getting the updated designs over. Thanks again,” you said politely, sending him a small smile. Yeonsik beamed in response and returned to his seat happily. You chuckled fondly at his antics before opening the file he’d sent. You loved your team members and you held a high respect for them. You knew you led them well and that they respected you in return. It was a small team, consisting of only five people, including you, but you were content with the group and the dynamic. You often went out for drinks together after work, usually followed by karaoke and at least one member passing out, most often Yeonsik, who would then be picked up by his boyfriend. You were a close-knit group and you couldn’t imagine a better job.

Slowly, Mrs. Min’s words crept back into your mind at the thought of how much you loved your position. Surely, Yoongi wouldn’t expect you to quit your job? You wouldn’t be able to bear it. 

No, he said that he would do his thing and you would do yours, you reminded yourself. That’s right, you’d agreed that you wouldn’t interfere in each other’s lives. Except, you hadn’t really agreed, had you? You’d just acquiesced because he’d been in the motion of leaving anyway. You weren’t really sure if that’s what you’d wanted, living separate lives and being married only on paper. 

Yoongi’s words rang clear in your head as you gnawed on your lower lip, was this really how this marriage was going to be? The two of you not even acknowledging each other except at galas and parties where you had to appear married? You didn’t want that.

But…if Yoongi did, how much say did you really have? As much as you wanted to make this work, it had to be a two-way street. If Yoongi didn’t want anything to do with you, you would have to accept that and just try to get through this the best you could. You had said to Joohee that day you’d found out, that there’s nothing you can do to stop him. 

It felt painful to come to terms with, especially in the environment of your office where you still had to appear professional. Thankfully, you breathed, none of your team members had noticed your mini-mental breakdown. 

Your phone buzzed with a new message from Yujin, your mother’s assistant.

From Yang Yujin

Hello Miss Y/N,

Your mother has asked me to confirm your three attendees for your wedding invitations. The invitations will be sent out on Friday night, so please send your three names with their contact information and address to me by then. If possible, please send it at least one day beforehand as Mrs. Seo would like to review them before I send the invitations out.

Additionally, she has set up another meeting for you with Mr. Min Yoongi on Friday, at 6 pm. Please find the location details below.

Please let me know if you need any other information,

Yang Yujin

You sighed, reading over the email again. For one, you honestly didn’t even know who you’d want to invite. You didn’t really have that many friends outside of Joohee, your colleagues, and Jung Hoseok, your friend from college. You knew that Joohee would already be invited, but you weren’t sure about Hoseok. He wasn’t a part of the same social circle as you and Joohee, especially since he didn’t come from a richer family, but you’d met him in college and introduced him to Joohee soon after. The three of you had been practically inseparable during your undergrad but after graduation, the three of you hadn’t met up in person in a while, with Hoseok in Busan for work. You tapped your chin thoughtfully with the eraser end of a pencil, maybe you should send an invite to Hoseok. Suddenly, another thought occurred to you, making the pencil drop from your fingers and onto your lap.

You hadn’t even told Hoseok about Yoongi!

“Damn,” you muttered, making a mental note to call him later today. You’d figure out the other invites later. Your eyes drifted to the second part of the email. 

Another meeting, huh? It sounds like it’ll be just the two of us this time. I wonder if he’ll be any different.

A rap of knuckles against your desk brought your attention back in front of you. Song Ha stood beside your chair, looking at you curiously, “It’s lunch, Team Leader. Want to grab something with the team downstairs?”

Shit, you had agreed to grab lunch with Joohee today. 

“No, Miss Choi, I’ll be meeting a friend of mine. But you all enjoy your lunch!”

“Alright, have fun!”

The team slowly filed out, discussing amongst themselves what they’d get from the cafeteria today. You almost longed to go with them, but you knew you had to tell Joohee about the email you got. 

You could feel a headache coming on. 

Sighing, you stood and gathered your things into your tote bag, never having liked purses, and started the walk towards the elevators to reach the quaint cafe across the street you and Joohee liked to frequent. 

You had arrived before Joohee, which was to be expected with your office right across and decided to grab a table for both of you. Setting your tote bag in the seat beside you, you read the email once more on your phone. It dragged another sigh out of you before you almost jumped into the air at the sound of Joohee’s voice.

“What’s got you so melancholy?’

You breathed out to calm your heart rate from the mini jumpscare and looked up at her. She was dressed a bit more formal than you in a light blue blouse and dark navy dress pants that fell gracefully in silk around her long legs with a maroon purse hanging from her shoulder. Her office was much more formal than yours, working under her father. Your own office often had team leaders and higher-ups in jeans, the nature of your work making it more casual, so you contrasted her in a simple black sweatshirt and blue jeans. 

“I have to meet Yoongi again on Friday.”

“God damn.”

You nodded somberly as she took her seat across from you, “You remember what happened last time? Why does it feel like he’s gonna eat me alive this time?”

Joohee looked at you suggestively, wiggling her eyebrows.

You recoiled, shooting her a glare, “Good God, woman, not like that.”

Joohee relented, waving her hands in surrender, “Okay, well, assume he’ll be the same. Then you won’t be caught off guard. But I think you should still try to get through to him. Maybe, at the very least, you guys can become friends.”

You hummed in agreement, what she was saying made sense. You weren’t exactly hoping for a rom-com drama-like romantic relationship, but being friends wouldn’t be so bad. 

A waiter arrived, taking your drink and food orders, and you and Joohee fell back into easy conversation about your jobs and other small gossip. As much as you were trying to pay attention to what Joohee was saying, you couldn’t help your mind returning to Yoongi and his dark eyes scrutinizing you and his cold, biting voice. 

“Y/N?”

You focused back into Joohee and her concerned stare dug into you, “What?”

“Are you still thinking about Yoongi?”

You nodded, looking away. You felt bad for not listening to her especially when she had basically given you a solution to your anxiety regarding Friday. You heard her sigh before speaking. 

“Listen, Y/N, you can’t stop how he’s going to behave towards you. You can only control how you respond. I think your best bet is to try to tell him you’re not expecting him to treat you like a wife, but you want him to treat you like a friend. Unless that isn’t what you want.”

“No, it is,” you said, keeping yourself from burying your head in your hands, “And you’re right, that’s all I can do. Why didn’t you become a therapist, again?”

Joohee only grinned in response, “I’m too pretty.”

Joohee’s words from earlier echoed in your head for the rest of the workday. Did you really want him to treat you like a friend? Or something more?

You weren’t sure. Of course, you had this half-crush, half-infatuation with the man since you’d met him when you were younger, but marriage was a totally different game. Were you really ready to spend the rest of your life with a man you were attracted to but he couldn’t feel the same? 

Maybe he could.

You knocked that thought away as soon as it entered your mind, you shouldn’t be getting your hopes up. You knew that Yoongi was less than happy about the situation and the unfavorable circumstances would only serve to further distance him from you. You would have to be okay with just being friends if that. 

As you paced around your apartment later that night, you stopped in front of your dresser in your bedroom. In the third drawer from the top was the handkerchief that Yoongi had given you when you were younger. You had kept it meaning to give it back to him, but you had barely seen him since then, let alone had a moment in private to give it to him. 

Most of your interactions had been minimal conversations at parties and galas, often accompanied by Joohee and Seokjin. You couldn’t recall a time when Yoongi had actually talked to you directly in any of those scenarios. So why did your crush persist?

Maybe it was the innocence of your first meeting, the cliche of it all. You, small, sad, and alone, and Yoongi, showing up like your knight in shining armor. You had had a fascination with him since then, always trying to seek out his silhouette or pitch-black hair at gatherings afterward. Yet, he never approached you alone, nor did you make an attempt to do so yourself. You had called it an infatuation with Joohee because it really was, you didn’t really know anything about him, much less had a full conversation with him. Even when you were in a group with him, Seokjin, and Joohee, he would barely acknowledge you. 

Not that he was obligated to.

You fell back onto your bed and stared up at the ceiling, letting out a soft grunt when you hit the mattress. Would you be able to survive actually getting to know Yoongi? Your greatest fear was that you would fall in love with him, you were basically already primed for it. And that would not work out, you knew that, and you refused to consider any other outcome.

You couldn’t afford to get your hopes up.

Turning on your side, you could feel your thoughts drift to your few interactions with him growing up. He had always been polite, but cold. The most he’d said to you was a curt greeting and the barest of small talk. The only other interactions you’d really had were your first meeting and hearing about his escapades through the grapevine, mainly Joohee. Nonetheless, you found yourself infatuated, your eyes finding his slightly round cheeks and pouty lips inevitably. What would life be like once you got married?

You tried to imagine yourself in a domestic setting with Yoongi but quickly shut that down, that would only bring up unwanted feelings. You considered whether or not he would continue seeing other people after you were married. Joohee had said it was very possible. Would you be able to handle it? Joohee had suggested that you fool around a bit yourself but you had quickly dismissed that. Cheating was something you would never tolerate in a relationship, from the other person or from yourself. You knew that the reality would be different in your situation, but you still refused to let yourself stray from Yoongi.

Not that you hadn’t tried in the past. You had been in only two relationships leading up to now, one in college and another as a short burst after graduation. It all felt pointless when you knew you wouldn’t get to choose who you spent the rest of your life with. It was an agony that, along with other factors, ended both of your relationships. Mina had been a bright spot in your life, but she couldn’t deal with the fact that you were not only not out to your parents, but that you would likely not be able to be with her long term anyway. There had been other signs that the relationship wouldn’t work out, and you had tried to remain friends but it didn’t pan out past college. 

The relationship after college that had only lasted a few months was with Jaehyun, a sweet man who had been your coworker at your first job out of college. He was very kind to you and you felt comfortable in his presence, but you couldn’t handle the guilt of going out with him while knowing he wouldn’t be the one you marry. To his credit, he had been very understanding when you’d broken down in front of him in a guilt-fueled spiral. He’d held you until you calmed down, wiped your tears, and squeezed you tight before leaving, stating that you could always call him if you needed anything. You still messaged him sometimes, and you remained firm that if you did get to choose who to marry, he would be your first choice. 

The arranged marriage had been looming over your life since you were old enough to understand the importance of status to your family. You were sure Yoongi’s family was the same. You were both expected to keep your duty to your family, a repayment for the comfortable life you both had lived. Once or twice you had considered telling your parents you wouldn’t go through with it when the time came, but you knew that it would only result in you having to pay them back for everything they had ever given money towards for you. Even though you’d gotten multiple scholarships for college, your parents insisted you go to a prestigious university that rarely gave any money to their students because they knew their parents would have wide-open wallets. There was no way you’d ever be able to pay that back in your lifetime, especially with your current job. 

So you were stuck. But you knew you weren’t really all that unhappy. While the circumstances weren’t what you preferred, you couldn’t deny the small excitement that you felt at the prospect of being able to have a relationship with Yoongi. The caveat to that was also knowing that he was an entirely unwilling participant in this situation, which wasn’t really going to work to your advantage. You were set on remaining a realist, refusing to consider the idea that Yoongi might come to love you. It felt like you didn’t have much of any other choice. Everything about this entire situation made you feel like a passive observer, someone with no impact or voice, which wasn’t far from the truth. You imagined Yoongi was much the same.

Distantly, you wondered how many people Yoongi was allowed to invite to the wedding.

Speaking of! You had almost forgotten to call Hoseok, and it was getting late. You scrambled to reach for your phone, stretching your arm out to the nightstand where your phone sat, and grasping it. Dialing his number, you registered how low his contact was on your recent calls. You really needed to call him more often. Hitting his contact, you waited for the ringing to start. He answered rather quickly, which surprised you, as he was usually an early sleeper.

“Hey, Y/N! It’s been a while.”

“Yeah, it has. I missed you. Hobi,” you said, not realizing how much you meant it until the words left your mouth. It really had been too long since you’d called.

“What’s up? You don’t sound too happy. Is everything okay,” he questioned, and your heart warmed at his concerned nature. He was always able to read you well, better than Joohee sometimes. 

“Yeah, everything’s fine I guess. I’m getting married, actually.”

The other end of the line was silent for a bit before you heard Hoseok let out a breath and speak, “Oh, wow. Okay. How are you feeling?”

You choked out a laugh, “You’re not even asking who I’m marrying?”

“Well, I know that it’s not someone you chose. So I want to know how you’re doing. When did you find out?”

Your laughter died at his serious nature, your attempt at lightening the mood unsuccessful, “About two months ago. The wedding’s in around six. Want an invite? I get a whole three guests of my own choosing.”

He chuckled softly at that, “Of course I do, you know I’ll be there. But seriously, how are you feeling about this?”

You almost sighed at his unwillingness to let you escape his question, “I don’t know, honestly. I really don’t. I think I’m weirdly at peace with it? I’ve been expecting it for so long and now it’s finally happening. Plus, it being Min Yoongi isn’t exactly the worst thing ever.”

You could hear his surprise over the phone, “Min Yoongi? Like your crush of almost two decades, Min Yoongi?”

You groaned, responding, “Jeez, way to remind me how old I am. Yes, that Min Yoongi. He’s definitely not as okay with it as I am though.”

“What do you mean?”

You recounted the past meeting with his family to Hoseok while he patiently listened and interrupted occasionally to provide his own thoughts. When you finished, you could practically see him falling back against his desk chair, exhaling a burst of air. 

“Well, that’s a lot.”

You let out a short laugh, “Yeah, that’s been my life for the past couple of months.”

“I think Joohee gave you some good advice. I’d probably say something similar to you. Try to make the most of the situation but don’t expect a lot from him. I don’t want you getting hurt.”

You nodded, even though he couldn’t see you, “Yeah, you’re probably right. But, enough about me, how are you doing? How’s work?”

Hosek launched into recapping how busy the dance school he taught at had been lately and the gossip surrounding his coworkers. You felt yourself relax more into the conversation and slowly forget your troubling feelings surrounding Yoongi. 

You would deal with those come Friday. 

It was Friday. You made sure to leave work a bit early, giving you enough time to run back to your apartment to change and look presentable. You had chosen your outfit with Joohee’s help the night prior. You were meeting at a relatively fancy restaurant but it was more of a bar, so you didn’t want to be too formal. You had opted for a green dress with a small flower print since you were coming off the winter months into spring. Your dress was an A-line cocktail dress with a square neckline and puffed sleeves that cinched at your wrist. You’d had it for a while and knew how it looked on you, and you knew you would feel comfortable in it tonight. The last thing you needed weighing on your mind was getting in your head about how you looked, which you usually felt nauseous from. 

With it approaching six, you quickly finished up some minimal makeup, topped it off with a lip tint, and tried your best to make your hair look presentable after what was a long day of work. A glance at your watch told you that you didn’t have much time left, so you rushed to your car, almost forgetting your small purse, and started your drive over to the restaurant. You didn’t want to be late and make a bad impression on Yoongi, although you didn’t know if his impression of you could get any worse. 

After you arrived and were sat at your table, you checked your phone to see the time and were relieved to note that you were a couple of minutes early. You felt yourself relax into the booth and started taking slow, calming breaths to slow down your racing heartbeat. The adrenaline of trying to get to the restaurant on time was starting to fade and you took another glance at your watch. 

6:06

Well, that’s fine. He’s probably just a little late, you tried to reassure yourself, but you had a sinking feeling. As the minutes marched on, the sinking feeling grew deeper, and you could feel yourself growing slightly annoyed. 

6:29

Well, whatever.

You took out your phone from your purse and decided to message him. It should be reasonable, right? You had scheduled this beforehand, after all. Well, not you, your mother, but still, the principle held. 

You:

Hi Yoongi-ssi, this is Seo Y/N. I’m waiting at the restaurant at the moment 

and I was wondering if you were alright, since you weren’t here yet? Please let me know if you’d like to reschedule instead.

You winced at how the text message sounded more like an email between colleagues, but you weren’t sure how casual you were supposed to be with him. Before you could mull over the tone of your message more, you hit the send button and bit your lip as you waited for a response. Your fingers began to pick at your dress in a nervous habit and you kept your eyes trained on the restaurant entrance in case you spotted him. 

Finally, at 6:42, you saw the head of black hair that had haunted your dreams as of late. He walked in calmly, looking slightly disheveled, but his lax pace didn’t betray anything about his tardy entrance. He looked infuriatingly attractive in a well-fitted suit with the tie loosened and the top couple of buttons undone. His eyes met yours as the hostess led him to your table and you smiled politely at him, receiving only a cursory nod in return. The waitress quickly approached as he sat down across from you and took his drink order, two fingers of whisky, while you asked for more water. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to drink, more that you needed to keep your wits about you for this dinner and alcohol would only make you feel nauseous in your already anxious state.

With the waitress gone, he turned to you and you felt yourself flush automatically, something you internally cursed. You wished he didn’t have such an effect on you. He declined to say anything, so you took a moment to take in his appearance now that he was much closer to you. 

You could see that his collar was more rumpled than you initially thought and his hair a bit more mussed. You saw a small mark just barely visible from beneath his white button-up, above his tie. Now that he was much closer, you could smell a faint scent of a sweet perfume that you knew wasn’t yours since you had only worn a very light citrus one. 

Oh. He was with someone else. Why does that bother me so much?

Finally, he spoke, his deep voice lulling you out of your trance of staring at the mark on his chest, “Sorry I’m late. I saw your text, but I was driving. To be completely honest, I forgot about this.”

For a moment, his apology surprised you. For some reason, you hadn’t expected him to apologize. Maybe you’d built him up to be this cartoon villain in your head after your last interaction, but you’d forgotten that he was human just like you. 

“That’s alright, it’s no problem,” you responded kindly, noting the way his eyebrow slightly furrowed at your response, “How was your day?”

He raised an eyebrow at you in a questioning manner, “Are you really going to do small talk with me?”

You let out an embarrassed laugh at your failure to engage him and tried for a new tactic instead, “Okay, what would you like to talk about then?”

“I want to set some ground rules.”

Your surprise must’ve shown on your face because you saw the way his expression almost changed to amusement. You quickly shook off the abruptness of the statement and nodded your head, “Okay, like what?”

“First, you’ll be moving into my apartment. I’m sure your mother already told you,” you nodded, “Do not enter my bedroom or office without knocking. I’ll extend the same courtesy to you. Second, we keep our lives separate. Unless we need to appear at an event together, we shouldn’t be mingling our private lives, including friends, work, things like that. Thirdly, this marriage is going to be on paper only. Don’t expect me to treat you like my girlfriend, or my wife, because we both know that’s not what this is.”

You felt your teeth take in your bottom lip as you considered his words, “Okay, that’s fine, I guess.” You couldn’t really stop him from wanting to do that, but it still hurt some. Any hopes you had of getting a normal romantic relationship after this were quickly dashed by his next rule.

“Lastly, I want this to be open. Our parents aren’t pressuring us for kids, so we can both find relief elsewhere. We both know this is only for increased stocks and influence in our respective companies. So, I do whatever I want and you do whatever you want in that regard, and we don’t interfere in each other’s love lives.”

You felt your face fall a bit, but you tried to control your expression. You had prepared for this, Joohee had prepared you for this. So why were you still so upset? He’s giving you the go-ahead to find whoever you want, so it’s not technically cheating. So why does it still feel so wrong?

“Okay,” you said uneasily, “That’s all okay.” It felt like you were saying it more for yourself than for him. 

His eyebrow quirked once more. They were very expressive, you noticed. 

“That’s it? You don’t have any rules of your own you want to add in?”

Your hands clenched onto the edge of the booth seat, needing something to ground you. Rules of your own? Your head was swimming with everything that had just happened, you could barely think of anything else, “No, none I want to add.”

Yoongi leaned back and clasped his hands, “Alright then. Shall we eat? My dad’s technically paying so eat all you want.”

You shakily took hold of the menu you’d already looked over a hundred times while waiting for him, not wanting to appear rude by being on your phone. You had already chosen what dish you wanted when Yujin had sent you the restaurant name, a habit of yours being to look up the menu beforehand to choose. The waitress approached and took your orders, taking the menu from your hands, leaving you with nothing to grasp your quivering fingers onto. 

You looked over at Yoongi, seeing him on his phone, scrolling. You felt yourself blanch at the blatant disregard and couldn’t find it in yourself to try and start a conversation. 

The minutes passed by slowly, and you were barely relieved when the food came, providing momentary respite by giving you something to do. You felt like you’d never been in a more awkward situation. The waitress quickly refilled both your drinks, and you noted that Yoongi had ordered water this time. It must be because he’s driving. 

Soon, the both of you finished your food, in utter silence. The waitress, who was quite on top of her game, swiftly provided the bill and told you to take your time. You had a feeling she felt the awkward tension as much as you did.

Once the bill was paid, you and Yoongi walked out towards the parking lot where he started shifting to move in the direction of his car before you blurted out, “Wait!”

He turned, facing you with a bored expression, waiting for you to finish speaking.

“I do have a rule actually.”

Seeming slightly intrigued now, he gestured for you to continue.

“I want us to try and be friends. Please.”

He seemed slightly surprised, judging by the way his eyebrows lifted slightly and his mouth parted. Collecting himself, he looked directly into your eyes, his dark orbs boring into your own, “No. I want us to keep our lives completely separate. We’re not friends.”

With that, he turned around and walked to his car, not sparing you another glance. 

“Wow, what an asshole.”

You hummed lazily in agreement, feeling your head lull. You were already a bottle deep in more cheap Moscato with Joohee, as well as a couple of shots of strawberry soju. 

“I know right! I agreed to whatever he said, why couldn’t he agree with the one thing I asked for?”

Joohee winced and prepared herself for your buzzed anger that was sure to flare up at her next statement, “Well, he wasn’t exactly wrong. It did conflict with his other rule. Not that I think he’s justified either. There shouldn’t be a problem in being friends.”

Your head snapped towards her, seeing it as a defensive move for Yoongi in your half-drunken state, but before you could find the energy to get upset, you felt yourself melt further into the couch, “Yeah, you’re right, I guess. Whatever, I don’t need him. I’ll just fuck anyone who looks my way, instead.”

“No, you won’t.”

“No, I won’t,” you cried, collapsing onto the pillow beside you, squeezing it tight, “Why am I so pathetic?”

“You’re not,” Joohee cooed, “You’re just in a shitty situation. So is he, but at least you’re not being a dick about it.”

You nodded glumly, still not feeling better about the situation. As you cradled the now-empty wine bottle to your chest, you remembered Hoseok.

“Oh yeah, I invited Hobi for the wedding. My coworker, Song Ha too. Can you believe I couldn’t think of a third person?”

Joohee laughed before throwing herself onto the couch with you, “Hey, you don’t need other friends, you have me. Besides, we’ll all be together again, then! It feels like forever since we’ve seen him.”

“Yeah, I told him and he said the same stuff as you. To try and make the best of it, or whatever,” you could feel yourself becoming less and less sober, “Can I crash here tonight?”

“Of course, do you want me to wash your dress for you?”

“No, I’ll just do it at my place. Thank God I have you.”

Joohee only laughed loudly in response, getting up to grab another bottle of soju from the fridge. The two of you lounged around before moving to watch TV in Joohee’s bed where she promptly fell asleep. Soothed by her snoring, you relaxed into her comfortable mattress and traced the light extrusions on her ceiling. Your thoughts soon drifted to Yoongi, as they seemed to do often these days. 

Was he really fair in rejecting your friendship? Joohee had made a good point earlier in that it certainly conflicted with his rule of ignoring each other outside of obligated functions. But…you didn’t want that. So why did you agree? In the moment, it hadn’t really felt like you’d had another choice. You seemed to be feeling like that a lot lately. 

Yoongi seemed serious about this marriage being for business only and you knew that you didn’t want that, but you couldn’t exactly tell him as such. You couldn’t be more sure that he would only be disgusted if he heard you say that and you didn’t think you’d be able to survive seeing that kind of emotion on his face when it’s directed towards you. 

Not that you’d be able to survive this marriage either. 

Your fingers toyed with the frayed hem of the sleep shorts you’d borrowed from Joohee, a frequent occurrence whenever you stayed over, and you saw her shift in her sleep. She really had been so supportive throughout this whole thing. 

Maybe you should go to her brother for help? No, Yoongi would probably hate that. 

You resisted the urge to kick your feet in frustration out of fear of waking up Joohee. This was so difficult, it was next to impossible to figure out what your next move should be. 

You had a nagging feeling that your mother wouldn’t force you to meet up with Yoongi anymore before the wedding, but why did that not feel like a clear-cut win? Did you want to meet with Yoongi again?

Rubbing at your eyes frantically, you pushed aside the flurry of questions stirring inside you. You didn’t have time to deal with this. There was a large project at work that was in its final stages that you needed your full attention on and then the final beta tests before the official launch, just weeks before your wedding. You couldn’t afford to spend another moment thinking about Yoongi. 

As you got more comfortable in Joohee’s bed, you turned your head to face the clock on her bedside table, reading 3:09 AM. 

A sigh escaped your lips as you forced your eyes closed to try and get some rest. 

You had an inkling that Yoongi would be occupying your thoughts whether you wanted it or not. 

“We’ll be meeting for the rehearsal dinner in one week, Yujin will send you the information and instructions. Don’t be late.”

Your mother’s voice cut off after that, not bothering to say goodbye before ending the call. You could feel your headache coming back and you fumbled for your water bottle before getting up to grab a red ginseng packet from the breakroom. Things had been a lot lately. 

The final preparations for the wedding were underway and your mother was leaving nothing to chance. Your dress had been fitted to perfection with your mother sending you a strict diet and workout plan to make sure you stayed the exact same size until the wedding. That email had been swiftly archived. 

You weren’t even sure of who was in your bridal party other than Joohee being your maid of honor. Not that it mattered. This wedding wasn’t for you anyway. 

As you slowly sucked out the paste from the ginseng packet, leaning against the break room counter, you wondered if Yoongi had had to go through similar procedures, though likely less extensive. You hadn’t heard from him since that dinner where he’d firmly placed a boundary between you, but he’d rarely left your mind since. You’d hoped that the reality check with Yoongi might help clear you of your feelings for him, but, instead, they only deepened your desire to get to know him better, to break past that boundary. But you knew that those ideas were merely fairy tales and this marriage was not going to be one by any means. 

Distantly, you wondered how the ceremony would go. The two of you hadn’t prepared any vows, nor were you expected to. This wedding was not a show of love and everyone knew that. Your parents weren’t concerned with making it appear as though you and Yoongi were a loving couple, no, this wedding was more of an excuse to show off their wealth and influence. Your nuptials were merely a byproduct. Still, would you have to kiss Yoongi?

You quickly shook your head, trying to rid yourself of the mental image, feeling your cheeks flush hot. Yet, you couldn’t get it out of your head. You imagined his lips would be soft and gentle, that he would lead you through the kiss and deepen it for more. His hands would come to rest at your waist before encircling it, pulling you closer, flush, to his body. 

No! You can’t imagine that, you’re not allowed!

Internally, you scoffed. What kind of girl wasn’t allowed to imagine kissing her fiance? You knew the truth, however, that it wasn’t your place to imagine yourself in that position. That was reserved for the person he loved, who was, decidedly, not you. 

Tossing the packet, you made your way back to your way back to your desk. Settling into the pillowed surface of your chair, you browsed through your emails before noticing one from the marketing team.

From: limheesungmarketing1@okgaming.com

RE: MIRA’S AWAKENING Influencer Advertising

Hello Team Leader Seo,

We have decided that we would like to reach out to online influencers and streamers to assist in promoting Project Mira’s Awakening. A list of possible candidates is attached, along with their profiles and viewer analytics. We would like your input on any public figures you believe may be good candidates for this endeavor. Please reach out if you and your team come up with any candidates that are not already included in the attached file.

Additionally, we would like to create merchandise to provide for these public figures and we need to confirm with you and Graphics Team 2 on graphics we can include on merchandise items. You will find a list of items we are looking to make, along with graphics suggestions, attached as well. Please coordinate with GT 2 to send over finalized ideas and start creating the images.

Thank you,

Team Leader Lim

You considered the contents, feeling the eraser of your pencil tap against your lip, who could you suggest? You had your favorite streamers, but none aligned that well with the nature of the game you were producing, which meant the viewer base wouldn’t have enough crossover with your target audience. Running through a list of the streamers you watched regularly in your head, you stopped at one in particular. 

Goldenboy97. 

Jeon Jeongguk was quite popular and played enough combat-based games to have sufficient audience crossover, while still being intriguing for the puzzle aspect of the game. Not that you were biased, but he was your favorite creator at the moment. You jotted down his handle and a note to ask the rest of your team about their thoughts. 

Leaning back in your chair, you stared blankly at the screen as the emails continued flooding in. Slowly, but surely, your thoughts drifted back to the phone call with your mother. The wedding was next week, with the rehearsal dinner only being seven days away. 

You felt a strange combination of dread and giddiness, a swirl of emotional turmoil you weren’t ready to unpack. Hoseok was coming back tonight and you were picking him up from the train station. You’d probably have time to process your emotions then. Hoseok was staying at your apartment in the guest bedroom for a couple of weeks so he could be there through the whole wedding process. He had also mentioned looking for an apartment to move into in Seoul, which made you excited. You really wanted to have the college dream team together again.

The thoughts of the actual wedding were stoking your nerves, you still hadn’t talked to Yoongi since the last time you’d met. You weren’t sure of the protocol or if you should try to talk to him beforehand, especially about the ceremony. Too cowardly to act on your anxiety, you shut off your opened messaging app on your phone. You weren’t keen on finding out how Yoongi would respond to an unprompted message. 

The sound of your team packing up alerted you to the time, being slightly past five. You joined them in getting ready to leave before heading to the elevator. The rest of the group trekked slightly ahead while Song Ha walked slightly slower to stay back with you. 

“So, the wedding is next week. Are you excited?”

You chuckled nervously, “Yeah, you could call it that.”

“Ah, are you nervous? Makes sense. Just think, though, soon, you’ll be married to the love of your life! How exciting!”

Your insides felt queasy. You hadn’t told Song Ha about the nature of your relationship with your betrothed because you weren’t exactly sure how to explain it to someone who wasn’t familiar, nor did you want to deal with the embarrassment, “Yeah, I guess so.”

“Where are you going for your honeymoon?”

You bit your lip, “Nowhere, actually. We couldn’t get time off of work at the same time.” The honeymoon had long been decided as an unnecessary expense, and neither you nor Yoongi complained. Being stuck with him for weeks after the wedding in another country sounded like a nightmarish situation. You wouldn’t have minded a vacation though.

“Gosh, that sucks. Hopefully, you’ll be able to do something over the summer, maybe,” Song Ha pouted, swinging her work bag in line with her step. You smiled at her naivete.

“Yeah, hopefully.”

“Hobi!”

You ran towards the taller man, throwing your arms around his upper body, “I missed you! It feels so nice to have you back in Seoul.”

Feeling his chest rumble with a laugh, you squeezed him harder before releasing him. 

“Feels good to be back too,” he responded, a bright, heart-shaped smile adorning his face, “Let me get my bags to your car.”

“Oh, right, let me help,” you nodded, reaching for the bigger suitcase to roll towards your car. Hoseok easily picked up the duffel bag lying at his feet and followed behind you. You had opted for driving to the station since his train had come too late for the buses to still be running, and you didn’t want to have to deal with paying for or lugging his baggage into a cab. 

After loading the luggage into your trunk, you both settled into the front seats of your well-worn car. You heard Hoseok chuckle while clicking in his seatbelt, “This certainly feels different from the drunk bus and taxi rides back to the campus dorms. Even if it’s about the same level as luxury.”

You rolled your eyes, “Hey, my car is reliable. The previous owner only had it for a couple of years before selling it off and she’s been perfectly good since then. Though, my mom would probably agree with you on the luxury bit.”

“Yeah, well, who wants to listen to her opinion anyway. Before I forget, thanks again for letting me stay at your place while I’m here, I know it’ll probably be annoying with the wedding prep going on.”

“It’s no problem, seriously. Besides, a lot of my stuff’s been moved over to Yoongi’s for when I move after the wedding. I’m just keeping my apartment there in case I need it since I won’t be paying rent at Yoongi’s.” Keeping the lease on your apartment had been a conscious decision because you had figured you’d want a safe space away from the marriage drama and it wouldn’t be an extra hit to your income. What your mother and Yoongi didn’t know wouldn’t hurt them. 

“Has he really paid off his entire apartment? You’re marrying a proper chaebol,” Hoseok joked. 

You laughed lightly, a tinge of awkwardness at the idea that you really were, and you had no idea how he’d act in his own house. Tapping your fingers along the steering wheel, you tried to subtly change the topic, “Well, speaking of apartments, do you know where you’re going to be looking?”

Hoseok launched into a detailed plan he had for looking at rental properties in Seoul for both his apartment and the studio he wanted to open. You excitedly listened along, thrilled that he was planning on settling near you, as you drove to your own apartment. 

After you’d parked, Hoseok insisted on taking the large suitcase, claiming that only he was strong enough to lug it up the stairs. You only laughed a little bit at his sour expression when you showed him the perfectly working elevator. 

Punching in the code to your apartment, you swung open the door, making sure not to step food inside. A loud pop rang out and confetti sprayed out from the doorway.

“Surprise!”

Hoseok stumbled back, clutching at his chest and mouth agape at Joohee’s excited smile from inside the apartment, “Shit, Joohee, you scared me!”

You laughed loudly before grabbing his suitcase and rolling it inside, setting the duffel bag on top. Joohee began cleaning up the mess of confetti, Hoseok started to unpack what he’d need for the night, and you began unboxing the pizza that had arrived while Joohee was setting up. 

As the three of you settled into your living room, Hoseok already teasing Joohee, you felt like a void in your heart had been filled. The last few months had been so stressful and it hadn’t felt like you’d gotten a break emotionally in so long. The sounds of your friends chattering and laughing made you feel at ease. So, naturally, Hoseok had to ruin that.

“So, Y/N, how are you feeling about the rehearsal next week? Or the wedding, for that matter.”

You shifted in your position on the loveseat, feeling yourself frown, “Um, I don’t know. I don’t know what to expect. I can’t believe I’ll be married in just over a week.” Letting out a nervous laugh, you continued, “I haven’t talked to Yoongi in like six months. I don’t know what I’m going to do.”

You could feel yourself spiraling, but you had been holding in so many emotions that it felt like you couldn’t stop yourself from talking, “Honestly, I’m really scared. I don’t want this to be my life forever. I’m not ready, I don’t think I’ll ever be.”

Joohee got up from her spot on the couch to hug you, Hoseok joining soon after. Something about their touch comforting you pushed you over the edge, the dam broke, and tears began streaming down your cheeks. You sniffled pathetically, hating the level of vulnerability you were currently displaying. You hadn’t cried throughout this whole experience, but in the comforting presence of your closest friends, you couldn’t help it. 

“I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to marry him if it’s going to be like this. Why does my life have to be this way? Why can’t I be normal?”

Joohee and Hoseok only squeezed you in response, not having an answer to your questions. Your tears continued on until you couldn’t cry anymore and Joohee finally released you. She stood and smiled kindly at you, “Do you want me to get you anything?”

“Water, please,” you said raspily, throat dry from all the crying. Joohee nodded before heading to the kitchen, leaving you with Hoseok who had shoved himself into the loveseat to further comfort you. 

“Thanks,” you mumbled, slightly muffled by burying your face in Hoseok’s soft, cotton shirt. 

“You know you can always talk to us. I wish I could change this for you, that you didn’t have to do this,” he said softly, stroking your hair. 

“It is what it is,” you said, feeling much more mellow now that you’d cried out all your overwhelming emotions. 

“Still,” Hoseok insisted, “He has no reason to be such a jerk.” You shrugged, you felt the same but there wasn’t much you could do to change that. 

Joohee returned with a cup of water which you gratefully took and sipped. Suddenly feeling quite exhausted, and a headache coming on, you tapped Hoseok to get off of you, to which he complied and clambered off the loveseat.

“Sorry guys, I’m just so exhausted now. I really appreciate you being here, but I think I’m going to head to bed,” you stated, hugging both of them, before starting to gather the trash to clean up. 

Joohee laid a hand on your shoulder to stop you, “Go, get some rest. We’ll clean up.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes,” Hoseok exclaimed, and pushed you towards your bedroom, “Go to bed!”

Laughing, you acquiesced and headed into your bedroom to get ready to sleep. As you went through your nightly routine, you felt yourself feeling a bit calmer about the upcoming week. You had your two closest friends by your side. 

You were ready to handle anything that Yoongi threw at you.

Probably.

Yoongi lightly swirled the glass of whiskey between his fingers as he sat at his desk in his brown leather chair. By this time next week, he would be getting married. 

His eyes drifted towards the manila folder lying at the edge of his desk, a small water stain on the corner. Inside were the files on his soon-to-be wife, Seo Y/N. He took a sip of his whiskey, the smoky flavour traveling down his throat, as he considered his fiancee. 

He didn’t know what to make of her. She just seemed so meek and obedient, which wasn’t at all appealing. He didn’t remember much of her from before the arrangement, aside from vague interactions between them and the Kim siblings. She had seemed quite timid then too. 

Sighing, he leaned back in his chair, setting his glass on his desk. He didn’t want to do this marriage. It was a chore, really. 

Yoongi didn’t necessarily have anyone he was looking to marry, but having to pretend to be exclusive with some girl he didn’t care about wasn’t conducive to the bachelor lifestyle he’d cultivated. He’d set his ground rules, and she’d agreed, pretty easily, another thing that irked Yoongi. 

Couldn’t she stand up for herself? Or say anything at all that was her own opinion?

Yoongi drummed his fingers on the arm of his chair, he supposed she had said something that night. She’d wanted to be friends. He hadn’t been expecting that.

He figured it might be some condition about how she didn’t want to work or for him to stop seeing other people, but, instead, she’d simply asked for his friendship. And he’d refused. 

Of course he did, it went against his other rule. He wanted to keep his life separate from this artificial marriage and that included remaining nothing but acquaintances. He’d have to be steadfast, he decided. That night, when he’d seen your imploring expression with hope shining in your eyes, he’d almost agreed. He wasn’t sure why that was, or if he even wanted to know, but he couldn’t let it happen again. 

Despite your docile and unassuming nature, you were dangerous. And you didn’t seem to know it, which made you all the more so.

previous / masterlist / next 

[thebisexualdogdad]

can u make a sequel (or maybe even a prequel 😉) to ur tim x male! chen reader fic?

Lucy's brother part 1

Tim Bradford x Male!reader

So finding out that you had slept with your sister's training officer was pretty awkward to say the least but you really liked Tim and talked to them separately to see if there was any possible way you could continue to see him.

They each had valid concerns and neither wanted anyone to think Tim would give Lucy special treatment just because he was dating her brother but after a couple of weeks the two of them decided you and Tim should give this relationship a real shot.

You didn't necessarily keep it a secret but you weren't so open about it either which wasn't hard for Tim since he already preferred keeping his private life private… well, except for his best friend Angela who still found this whole situation quite amusing, most people at the station didn't even know he was gay.

Lucy on the other hand had a much harder time not spilling your relationship to everyone especially Jackson and Nolan.

“Tim seems in a good mood, maybe he'll take it easy on you today,” Jackson laughs as they collect their war bags for their shift.

“Huh? What? I have no idea what you're talking about I wouldn't know why he's in a good mood,” she rambles, avoiding eye contact as she ejects herself from the conversation and hurrying out the door to the patrol cars.

You rarely brought Tim to the apartment, usually spending time at his house to avoid creating any awkward run ins like the time he used your shower after a day at the paintball range and Lucy came home to him walking around in only a towel.

Tonight however Lucy told you she was going to be gone due to plans to go bar hopping with Jackson, Nolan and some of the other rookies they graduated with from the academy and her crashing at Jackson's apartment afterwards.

You took the opportunity to invite Tim over for a date night in, cooking him dinner and watching a movie however the movie was forgotten about half way through when Tim started kissing your neck.

Now you were on top of him making out on the couch, your phone on the kitchen counter where you couldn't hear your it buzzing with texts from Lucy saying how plans changed and Jackson was crashing with you guys instead.

The movie was too loud for you two to hear the front door opening and Lucy turned the light on to the sight of you in Tim’s lap, both of your shirts gone but luckily you were still dressed from the waist down.

“Oh my god,” she says covering her eyes.

“Hey Tim what are you doing here?” Jackson says pretty tipsy, taking him a minute to put the pieces together yet, “woah wait, are Y/N and Tim dating?”

You quickly hop off Tim and you scramble for your shirts, “you can open your eyes Lucy we’re decent.”

“You really couldn't go to your bedroom to do that?” Lucy questions, her words slurred, “now I have to burn the couch.”

“Don't be so dramatic nothing happened,” you sigh, “come on you are both drunk you should drink some water and go to sleep.”

“I can't wait to tell Nolan that you and Tim are dating Y/N, he didn't believe me when I said Tim was totally gay,” Jackson laughs.

After getting Jackson set up on the couch and Lucy in her bed you stand outside your apartment door with Tim saying goodnight to him.

“Sorry our date was a bust,” you apologize.

“It's alright let's just stick to having dates at my place,” he chuckles, “but uh could you talk to Jackson? I don't care if Nolan knows about us but I don't need him going and blabbing my personal business to the whole station.”

“I'll talk to him in the morning,” you smile, “but you know he's gonna tell Angela about this right.”

“Oh great, something else for her to tease me about,” he laughs, kissing you sweetly, “are you still in for the double date with her and Wesley next weekend?”

“Looking forward to it,” you say, kissing him one more time.

Dating your sister's TO was a lot harder to navigate than you thought it would be but you had fallen hard for Tim so you wouldn't change a thing.

[myown-worstenemy-2003]

Someone Else Callin' You Baby?

A/N: Hey y'all! I'm back on my bullshit with a mini-series! This is "chapter one" of the series! Can't wait to see the reactions to this! I hope you enjoy, and let me know any feedback that you have! If you feel up to it send me a request and I will do my best to give it justice!

Summary: You and your daughter are new to Hawkins, what's going to happen when you find your boyfriend, Billy Hargraves with someone else in his car?

Word Count: about 1300

"A-B-C! It's easy as one, two, fwee!" you hear from the backseat. You look into the rearview mirror, your five-year-old daughter was in her car seat looking out the window and singing along to The Jackson Five. You were on the way to see your boyfriend and for him to finally meet your daughter. It had taken you a few months for you to even think about letting him meet your daughter. But you ended up deciding that you liked him enough to let him meet her, that was today's plan.

You flicked on the turn signal as you came to the stop sign. You look at the house on the corner, home to your boyfriend, Billy. But you saw his car backing out of his driveway. You frown in confusion, did he forget that you were coming over today?

It was when he was leaving his road was when you caught a glimpse of someone in the passenger side, a woman to be specific. She was messing with the radio like she'd done it a million times before.

It wasn't until someone honked behind you that you realized that you still sitting at the stop sign. You turned off your turn signal and went straight instead.

"Are we there yet, Mommy?" Rhiannon asked, curious. You at her in the rearview mirror and said, trying to keep the tears from falling, "I think we're going to go to the park instead, is that okay?"

She nodded and them asked, "What about your friend? Is your friend coming to the park too?"

"No honey, somethin' came up, and they can't make it this time."

"Otay, Mommy."

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

"Mat 'n cheese, Mommy!" Rhiannon said excitedly whenever she got her kid's menu and started coloring. You smiled back to her, "Yes baby, you can have mac 'n cheese."

After you both got your food, Rhiannon was eating her mac n' cheese with her fork, sloppily but it was getting the job done.

You started thinking.

Two weeks ago that you and him. Riding down back roads, and singing along to the radio. Well, more like you were singing to the radio.

As you were thinking, you looked around and noticed that people were looking at you and whispering.

You're just being paranoid. You thought to yourself.

You heard 'Billy' whispered with your name along with someone else's name that you couldn't quite hear. You decided that it was time to go.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Billy called you to hang out, that was when you got some answers.

"I don't know Billy, I've been kinda busy and want to stay in with my daughter tonight," you told him.

"But we haven't see each other in weeks. I just miss my girl."

"Am I though?"

Billy paused, "What?"

"Am I your girl?"

"What makes you think that?"

"I saw you with another girl when I was going to bring my daughter over for her to meet you. A few days later, I heard people talkin' about us at the diner."

"Baby, I'm sorry, I forgot that we had that planned! My sister needed a ride to-"

You cut him off, "Just tell me, do you still want me to be in your life or not. That's all I want to know."

He was quiet for a second. The he spoke up, "Can I just have a little time to think and make sure that I'm ready to give you everything I have?"

You nodded your head, "Yes. When your ready, I'll be here. Just...keep in touch too. I still care about you. I'll see you later, okay?"

He gave you a long hug and then you left. Not exactly happy with the result but it was a start to something hopefully.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

"Let's see, what kinda cereal should we get?"

"Hmmmm, Toast Cwunch!" Rhiannon said excitedly. You both were in the store getting groceries for the week.

"Perfect choice baby girl!" you said excitedly with her, and put the box in the cart. You pushed the cart to move down the aisle and Rhiannon shouted, "Onwawd!"

While looking down the pasta aisle you spotted a familiar head of hair, a strawberry blond mullet, with a familiar denim jacket on his shoulders. You smiled and waited for him to turn around so you could wave at him, but as he did, you saw he was holding hands with another woman, that was not his sister.

You quickly backed out of the aisle. It was time to have the talk about you guys.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

You just put Rhiannon to bed and was watching TV while eating popcorn, when there was a knock on your door. You got up from your spot on the couch and answered the door.

There stood Billy leaning against the doorway, looking up at you with his charming smile that worked on you when you first started dating.

"Hey (Y/N), I missed you."

"Hi Billy, come in," you let him in and close the door behind you. You stand in the middle of the living room with your arms crossed, "How've you been?"

"Good, I've been meaning to call you and take you out," he said with his 'charming' smile again, now that smile just made you mad.

"Just been a bit...busy?" you asked with a little venom dripping in your voice.

"Yeah...a little busy," he looked at you for a second after picking up on your voice, "How about you?"

"Who was the girl that you were with in the grocery store the other day?" you asked out of nowhere. You could see that he was taken aback.

He didn't know that you saw him.

"I was with my cousin."

"Oh, really? You hold hands with your cousins?"

He threw his head back, and you said, "Just tell me what you really want. You wanted time and space, so I backed off and let you have that. I didn't think that it meant movin' along. So if you are callin' someone else baby just tell me. Bein' in the dark is drivin' me crazy and I just need to know."

He looked at you like he didn't know what to say.

"Look, it'll be what it will be, it's either her or me. Give me the word and you can be free and I'll leave you alone. If you're over me, just lay it on me. Just rip the Band-Aid off. So...are you seein' someone else?"

He looked away and quietly said, "Yes. I am."

"Okay. That's all I needed to know. Thank you. I'll see you around Billy," you said in monotone voice and opened the door for him and he walked out. He looked back once and then walked to his car and left.

You closed the door as he left, you sighed as you sat down on the couch. That's when you let the tears flow.

[abbysimsfun]

Sims In Bloom: Generation 2 Pt. 153 (Time For a Gender Reveal Party!)

On a rainy Saturday, Heather and Conrad were joined by friends and family for a gender reveal party in Brindleton Bay. Ash had hoped for a younger brother, but Lavender wanted a sister, and a gender reveal was a nice opportunity to bring loved ones together before they were busy at home with a newborn.

Plans to hold the party at Pupperstone Park with the pets were rained out, but Suri graciously allowed the Gordons to gather at the Salty Paw. She even agreed to let Daisy, who wanted to make a cake for the party, use her kitchen.

When Felix and Lilith arrived, Ash had to wait for his grandmother, Daisy, to gush over them for what they'd done to save him in Sulani. But after the legacy founder had showered them with gratitude, Ash placed what he'd made on the wooden bar. Using specs for an electronic upgrade part Lilith had ordered online, Ash designed a cardboard mock-up of the time travel component using plathinum, ironyum, and the shards, but he didn't have the tools to make it himself.

"I couldn't have drawn up these plans and designs, but I took welding in high school," said Lilith. "These are definitely easy enough to follow, and Emit's still around hanging out with my sister if we need more help back in Britechester."

Felix and Lilith were as loved up as ever. Even the truth of Felix's connection to Lilith's great-great-grandmother in his past life couldn't break them. He still had the ring, plotting the perfect way to propose, but today, at a celebration for their friends' baby, wasn't it.

Lilith even offered to mix drinks so Hazel or Suri wouldn't have to, happy to work on mixology skill left mostly dormant since college.

(Since the event didn't give us a tangible time travel device, I "made one" using the in-game icon. Janky or not, it's better than nothing! Also, I just missed him walking up to Lilith for an autonomous kiss, hence the awkward shot. Boo!)

Hazel was happy to let the Salty Paw serve as party central, but she refused to guess a gender even as Suri dipped into the buckets for a pair of pink shades. "I just don't know what's so important about declaring gender before the kid's even born. I know it's just a fun tradition, but I don't look good in glasses, anyway."

Heather smiled. "Don't worry about it. I know you'll love the baby the same no matter what. But Lavender, I really worry about. She doesn't want another brother at all."

The party was ostensibly for Lavender's benefit - the only one who truly cared whether or not she'd get a desired little sister. As such, even though Ash hoped for a brother, he picked pink glasses from the pink and blue bins near the punch bowl, along with both Heather and Conrad, to make her happy.

Heather greeted her dad with a hug, commiserating a moment over the family who couldn't be there. But Heather couldn't complain - Mortimer and Uncle Karl had taken River and Cass with Holly and Kris and all their kids to Willow Creek for a vacation.

Mortimer wanted to show them around the Goths' ancestral homeland, but he also planned to visit the family archives to look into the Landgraab-Goth connection suggested by the medallion in the jungle. Heather was undoubtedly curious over what they might find. She hoped it might ease her fears about a curse, but, deep down, she suspected otherwise.

Instead of dwelling on her fears, Heather focused on the guests who could make it. In addition to Felix and Lilith, hosts Hazel and Suri, and her parents, Everett and Spencer Pancakes paid a visit from Henford with their youngest, Violet, while their boys were away for a camping trip with school.

"Jett only went camping because Greyson was with him," Everett told Conrad at the bar. They both remembered their tragic camping trip in early spring, when Jett witnessed the death of Elsa Bjerg-Watson. "He's working with counselors just fine, but there's something he's locked away. He was such a chatty kid before all this, and now he might give you a few sentences. The only thing he talks about with any sense of interest anymore is death and the Reaper. I don't think he understands why Grim wouldn't let you plead."

Outgoing Felix introduced himself to the reverend with a charming smile. "I don't want this to be taken as unsolicited advice, but Lil and I looked at the benefits of moving to Ravenwood, recently, and something in particular might interest him. They host Afterlife Anonymous meetings, but they're for anyone. Not just ghosts, but anyone with questions about death and the afterlife."

Everett considered the idea and glanced toward the dance floor, where his wife moved to the jukebox with Lavender and their four-year-old daughter. "I'll talk to Spencer before we talk to Jett. I can rarely get away from the parish in Henford, but if it's something Jett needs, we'll make it happen. It's Felix, right? My wife says you were resurrected with ambrosia."

He nodded. "I was. I know some think that goes against the Watcher's design, but..."

"If the Watcher didn't sanction ambrosia, it wouldn't exist," Everett reasoned. "I had some concerns when the Ambrosia Society promoted their challenge last fall, because too much ambrosia, too many potions of youth, it can lead to overpopulation and corruption. But everything seems to be going well since, and I always trust the Watcher."

On the dance floor, young Violet Pancakes saw Lavender again for the first time since both were less than a year old. Now almost five, the girls chatted about toys and bounced to the music together.

Bella Goth made an appearance with her only granddaughter, Carina, entertaining the three-month-old while Alex and Lydia spent time with Jagger. "He's feeling a little neglected now he's got a baby sister, so they're off showing him a fun day with their complete attention while I get to play with this princess. I need some innocent cuddle time after Cali Skye came to visit me the other day. I thought I put all that work behind me."

"What did Agent Skye ask you to do, Mrs. Goth?"

"Oh, nothing much," she said, though Heather felt she wasn't saying everything. "We talked about those milk cartons people are collecting now, and how my face is on one of them. It's a little unnerving, and reminds me that I may never know where I went in the years I was missing, but we had a nice conversation. I just don't like to be reminded of the agency, that's all."

She cooed at dark-eyed Carina, who gazed curiously at Heather when Bella passed her over for a cuddle. "I've got to grab a pair of blue glasses for myself. I'm sure you're having a boy!" she chirped.

With Bella in the blue camp were Felix, Lilith, and Daisy, but Neal and Suri joined Ash, Heather, and Conrad on Team Pink. No one else went for a pair of glasses, which was fine. The buckets were there for those who wanted to play in solidarity with Lavender, who was too young to wear the shades, herself.

The party guests danced to the jukebox and dined on cake made by Daisy (exactly why I went for the balloon and not the cake-cutting reveal) before Heather and Conrad brought out a tall gold balloon. Once popped, either pink or blue powder would confirm if they were having a girl or a boy, and their guests gathered round in anticipation.

(Do you see how high Conrad is jumping?! It's amazing!)

Girl guesses outnumbered boy guesses by one (unlike the poll, which saw boy the top choice over girl and spider!), but the burst of blue didn't lie. Baby Gordon would be a boy, and everyone celebrated with noisemakers and confetti.

Conrad and Heather shared a warm embrace. All they cared for was a healthy baby, but this news wasn't unwelcome. Not to them, anyway.

Lavender, on the other hand, was tired and cranky after finding out she was due another brother. To make matters worse, the sugar high from the cake that sustained her for most of the afternoon had crashed hard. "It's okay, Lava. He'll be a nice brother, like me."

"No!" Lavender cried, stomping her feet and pushing away her brother's attempt at a hug with a kick. "I wanted a sister!"

"Ow, Lava! Don't kick me!"

Conrad had seen the whole thing and swooped in immediately. "Lavender Helena Gordon, apologize right now for kicking your brother."

"All I'll ever do is apolagize to brothers!" she complained.

"So start right now."

Her father's stern voice - a rarity at home - gave Lavender pause. She turned to her brother with a quiet apology before digging into some less sugary foods as the party wound down.

"Daddy, I'm not really mad about a brother," she explained after she'd calmed. "I won't be upset when baby brother gets here, I promise."

"It's okay to be disappointed, but it's not okay to be upset enough that you hurt people," explained Conrad. "If you're disappointed, just talk to us. We'll always listen."

Despite Lavender's outburst, the party was a success. People ate the food that was served, mingled happily, and danced in celebration at the Salty Paw.

Baby Boy Gordon's grand arrival was still a few months away, but after today, Heather and Conrad were even more excited for his arrival. ->

<- Previous Part (Gender Reveal Poll) | Gen 2 Start | Gen 2.1 Summary

Gen 1 Start | Gen 1 Summary

WCIF Poses? Heather and Conrad are posed before the cut with the amazing Us 3 posepack by Katverse.

NOTE: A lot of people who should be there weren't there because their circle is getting too big, but I do plan to show Mortimer and Uncle Karl and their trip in Willow Creek since they're going to investigate medallions and possible curses. So those we did not see aren't being totally forgotten!

NOTE 2: Lilith is not bothered by the connection to Maude Alcorn and I didn't make it a big scene, but you know me. That's probably not the end of it 👀

[mvltisstuff]

Could i request for a Conrad fisher X reader where reader has a younger sibling who gives her a hard time and her parents favour her younger sibling more. It's the reader's bday on the same day as belly's and her family doesn't get her anything and they don't bother with an excuse either and say they don't really care abt her so it doesn't matter. So Conrad comforts her later and if u don't mind u could include some smut at the end?

(this is my situation rn lololol but without Conrad to comfort me😭)

matilda - c.f

summary: request

conrad fisher x reader

a/n: i’m so sorry love, sorry this is a few days late but you are so loved and appreciated no matter what, hope this makes you happy today <3

it’s been a recurring theme for most of y/n’s life. the overheard quotes about the older sibling had eventually become a reality. they didn’t even wait for y/n to try and live up to them. instead, they just accepted that their daughter wasn’t as good as the rest of their children.

as upsetting as it is, kids experience it too much. y/n experiences it every day, so when she realized it wasn’t normal, that’s when it started to hurt more every year.

this day was supposed to be different. she was so excited, turning 18 and finally being an adult. free of her parents if she wanted to be. she thought that maybe, just maybe, her parents would think of her for a day, and make it about it. alas, the second she woke up and walked into the kitchen, y/n’s hopes were shut down.

“y/n, can you take y/b/n to practice? i’m going out with sharon today,” her mom said, barely even looking at her.

“uh, i’m leaving in a bit, remember?” she speaks, trying to sound as polite as possible. “the fishers invited me over for today.”

“hon, we get it,” her dad talks next, peering up over his glasses and newspaper of the town. “but, to some point, it’s just another day. just do what your mother asked.”

y/n looks at her little siblings at the table, messing around and receiving no repercussions. she still remembers when that was her. playing with her parents, happier than she ever was again. she loves her siblings to death, but she loves herself, too. y/n deserves more than she’s been given, so she confides. she drives her brother to whatever practice, wishing him luck as he whispers a happy birthday, then jumping out of the car to see his friends.

she’s already dressed up for the party for belly. the fishers had welcomed her with open arms, even having decorations and sweets for her on the table. everyone figured she’d have something going on at home, but oh, they were so wrong. she didn’t receive a single birthday message from the people who gave her life, so did it matter? even if she didn’t believe it, at least the fishers knew she was worth it. she was dressed in one of her best outfits, a simple dress with small flowers printed over. she had small wedges and her hair was done neatly. she felt pretty, she is pretty.

she walked into the house, belly hearing the door open first. she skips toward, engulfing y/n in a huge hug. “y/n!” she squeals. “happy birthday!”

“oh, belly! happy birthday to you, you look so cute!”

“are you kidding? your man’s gonna go wild when he sees you!” she whispers, making y/n blush toward the end.

“belly, stop!” she nudges. “he’s not my man… yet.”

they giggle together before moving back into the kitchen where y/n greets susannah and laurel, along with the rest of the boys. conrad stands up first, in a heartbeat. he walks over, almost lifting y/n off the ground in a hug.

“hey! happy birthday!” he tells her, excitedly as he pulls away. jeremiah comes piling in next, saying his words to the person he considers a sister.

“didn’t y/m/n have anything planned?” susannah asked from the pure kindness in her heart.

“oh,” y/n mutters. “we, uh, we did something yesterday.”

conrad can tell when y/n lies. he can read her like a book at this point. he’s spent so long fanboying over her that he knows what she’s feeling. when she’s sad, excited, pissed, he knows. it pulls at his heart when he can sense the disappointment in her voice. he starts to get more alarmed with every drink she takes throughout the day. she’s not even a big drinker, never really taking an offer. now he’s positive somethings wrong.

if y/n’s parents didn’t care about her, they don’t care if she drinks, right? she’s with her friends, she’s allowed to. plus. it’ll take the edge off of the internal wounds her parents have left her with. her feelings on the whole matter start to disintegrate for a while, until belly’s cake comes out and is handed to her. it’s so nicely done, perfect detail and so much love. they put time into her cake and party, and y/n can’t help the jealousy rising up. she vividly remembers every one of her younger siblings birthdays. all of them having their friends and a party, while y/n was just locked in her room on her birthday. the presents and the cheesy grins from everyone were overwhelming every year. she couldn’t help but think about what it could be like with her real family. maybe they could love her as much as she deserves, but in reality, they won’t. they can, but they chose not to, which hurts even more.

y/n stumbles around on the balcony, around people while carefully savoring every last drop of whatever is in her can. she’s probably had too many, but she doesn’t care. it’s almost like it’s reversed itself now. she watches belly open all of her presents and receive hugs and kisses, and the lump in her throat becomes thicker. she thinks of the alcohol as her enemy now, just bringing back the thoughts in her sober mind.

it’s not until everyone hears the clicking of y/n’s heels on the pavement that they notice her walking away. her hand is swiping away the loose tears and everyone looks at conrad. if there’s anyone y/n wants to see, it’s him. they’ve been in love for so long, it’s almost painful to watch. as she walks away, blurry vision from the alcohol and the tears, she tries to grab another can from the box before a hand stops her.

“i don’t think that’s a good idea,” conrad says, gently taking it out of her hand and landing it back in the box.

“oh, great. more fuckin’ judgment,” she retorts, making conrad’s face contort.

“hey, what’s going on? you’ve been off all day.”

“i am, perfectly fine,” y/n slurs. conrad places a hand on her shoulder, and takes them to sit on the steps. his arm is wrapped around her, the other one gripping her hand.

“i know you’re not. it’s ok to not be ok,” he looks at her nose scrunch and her cheeks turn red again. “hey, hey, don’t cry, you’re alright.”

“no,” she weeps out, putting her head in her hands. “i’m a mess! i don’t know what to do, i cant make it any better and i’ve been trying for 14 fucking years!”

“hold on,” he keeps his voice low. “what do you mean?”

“my parents don’t give a shit. they haven’t since y/b/n was born and they didn’t even bother about me anymore,” conrad pulls her into his arms, leaning back as her teardrops soak into his shirt. “i didn’t do anything for this, and belly’s being loved unconditionally without having to fight for it. and i feel like a bitch getting upset over it but-“

“absolutely not. don’t say that ever again. you don’t deserve anything they’re giving you. anything they’ve said to you is a fucking lie. i know who you are. you’re the most perfect, beautiful person i’ve ever met, inside and out. you don’t have to prove anything to them, because they don’t deserve your amazingness,” he speaks to her. it’s nothing but the truth, and nothing he would ever hesitate to say. “and i will spend forever trying to prove to you that you’re nothing but beautiful a beautiful person.”

y/n looks up at him, only bursting into more tears as he laughs a bit. “oh, my god, conrad. i love you, so much. i know i’m drunk but i mean it more than anything.” she’s felt nothing like she does now. she’s never had someone accept her so quickly and with so much appreciation. she feels like she can do nothing but cry and just love on him.

“i’m glad,” he begins again. “because i love you, too. no matter what your parents say or do. they don’t define you.”

and in this moment, for the first time in a long time, y/n knows someone loves her. and he’s not just saying it for comfort. she doesn’t need her parents to be loved. if they can’t do that, there will forever be someone out there who loves her just as much. she knows she’s enough, and that’s enough.

[whimsicalwritingsandmore]

Spy Family | ateez x reader

Pairing: spy!ateez x spy!reader

Genre: spy, action, a little romance

Word Count: 1223 words

Summary: You’ve been seeing Ateez for a year, and you’re wondering, can you actually break their hearts?

a/n: I still don't know how I feel about what I've written here but I've had this in my drafts for a YEAR and it's time that I finally complete it! this is a short series of 4 parts so I won't have a taglist for it, all the parts are drafted, it just needs editing so I'll publish the next parts as soon as I finish editing it! :) Enjoyyyy and let me know your thoughts! Reblogs and comments are greatly appreciated. <3

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Part 1

As you watched Wooyoung prepare dinner for everyone, the feeling of remorse sat heavily on your shoulders as the culpable feeling of regret gnawed at you from within. Every time you thought about what you were doing, your stomach twisted and churned with guilt.

It wasn’t supposed to be like this.

It was supposed to be a simple payback but now that you thought about it, nothing about it was simple from the start. It had almost been a year since you began your relationship with Wooyoung that had spilled over with the rest of the boys. Initially, you heard about them from your best friend whose younger brother was dating Wooyoung’s sister. Then you saw them around the Institute occasionally, since like you, they were spies in training. They joined a sister organization adjacent to yours and so, you would work alongside each other from time to time. Although, you were never on the same team for missions.

But perhaps it would have remained a professional relationship - if only Wooyoung’s sister didn’t break Beomgyu’s heart the way she did.

If only she was loyal and honest, maybe you wouldn’t be in this situation today. First, she lied and cheated, then she proceeded to humiliate him at the inauguration ceremony for new spy recruits. You remembered that evening vividly. Beomgyu had always been shy so it took a lot of courage to confess how much she meant to him that night. As everything unraveled, you were seething with anger alongside your best friend Ara. Before you knew it though, Ara was already on the other side of the hall, grabbing the girl by her ponytail and slamming her into a table before dunking her into the fountain. It took six people to get her off the girl.

That should’ve been enough revenge.

But for Ara, it wasn’t. She seethed in animosity and fury for months and then in sadness as she watched her sibling drown in heartbreak, humiliation and pain. Then she approached you. She snooped around for more information about the girl and discovered she had a younger brother - Wooyoung.

“An eye for an eye.” she claimed.

You could have said no. There was no need for you to get involved. But you considered Beomgyu to be like a younger brother so you agreed, albeit apprehensively. So now here you were - semi-cohabiting with all eight boys and they were nothing like what people had described about them. They kept to themselves and hardly interacted outside of their established circle so most claimed they were stand-offish and haughty. But in reality, they were kind, sweet, thoughtful and friendly.

Hongjoong, Yeosang and Jongho weren’t big fans of public displays of affection but rather preferred showing their affection in the safe spaces that were their rooms. On the other hand, Seonghwa and Yunho, who would seem intimidating because of their height, were sweethearts who didn’t mind small gestures such as either holding hands or being back-hugged in public unless it resulted in both of you tumbling down a hill…which happened only once. Meanwhile, San and Mingi were in-between because of their shy nature, while Wooyoung didn’t mind letting the whole world know how much you meant to him.

You couldn’t break their hearts.

So, you made another plan. In the next few days you had an upcoming mission that was out of the country and that would last a month, with perhaps a few weeks extra spilling over into the next. In that time, you would be unable to be in contact regularly so slowly, you would begin to distance yourselves from them. You weren’t going to tell them when you’ll be back and hopefully soon enough, the message would be clear.

As you replayed your foolproof plan in your head, Wooyoung draped himself over you while the others chattered amongst themselves as the evening wore on and dinner concluded. He ran his fingers through your hair and prodded your head with his nose to seek your attention as he swayed the two of you back and forth.

“You okay?” he whispered.

As you snapped out of your thoughts, you looked up to see the sweet, tender look he gave you - one that was filled with adoration and so much love. You nodded sweetly with a soft smile that you hoped was convincing before melting yourself deeper into his embrace, tracing circles on his forearm. He welcomed the gesture warmly and pressed a chaste kiss to your temple.

“I love you so much.” he murmured in your ear.

Everything inside you felt like it was frozen in place as you processed his words. Wooyoung said he loves you and though you tried to convince yourself that what you were planning was the best decision, you couldn’t ignore that bubbling feeling of warmth and tenderness that rushed in your veins when he said it - you felt the same.

On the way home, you were lost in thought. Your heart ached at the idea of never talking to the boys again. Each of them in their own way had left an impact that made your heart flutter and cheeks turn red. And after Wooyoung’s confession earlier and his sneaky kiss that may have turned into a small but passionate makeout session in a corner of the hallway right next to the elevator, you were distressed. It was unexpected like his confession. You were almost to the elevators when you felt a hand grab you and suddenly, you were being pulled into the cozy corner. Startled but aware of the familiar presence, especially by the bracelet on his arm that was identical to yours, you turned your gaze to find Wooyoung once again, staring at you with so much love and adoration before he pressed his lips to yours.

Arriving at your organization’s headquarters, you bumped into another figure who stood up to greet you but you didn’t see. It was Beomgyu. You both looked at each other with a sad smile, one that didn’t need any questioning because you both knew what it meant. The two of you strolled into the lobby in silence before Beomgyu turned to you and finally spoke.

“I’m sorry I’ve put you through this.” he laments.

“No,” you answer tiredly rubbing your face, “It’s on me. I agreed to it with Ara.”

“Still, I should’ve stopped you both.” he mumbles, “But…I also wanted revenge. At the time it felt so right.”

You couldn’t fault him, at one point, it seemed “right” to you too. 

“It’s okay, I’ll figure it out.” 

Before he can continue, you both hear a tick that raises alarm bells in your minds. The two of you turn around warily, unsure of what it is and where it's coming from, but before either of you can react, the wall explodes. Beomgyu grabs and pushes you under him to the ground behind a wall to protect the two of you.

After a few minutes of you trying to catch your bearings and soothe the unrelentless ringing in your ears, you look towards the debris and notice a small paper neatly rolled and tied with a gold string right in the middle of the floor, untouched by the rubble. Picking it up to read it, your blood runs cold with the three big words sprawled out in red.

“You’ve been warned.”