#toby fox why you make us suffer like this

[instaquarius]

So, about the new Chara/Asriel lore...

kind of yelled about this on my twitter already but-

WHAT IF Chara was keeping track in their mind cuz they know they'll only live to 100 or even just- maybe they started counting after accidentally poisoning Asgore and they felt bad so they spent a few days with Asriel "collecting" happy memories until Chara got to like- 99 or something or 999 and THEN decided to off themselves and come up with the plan to eat the buttercups and have their SOULs fuse to free everyone cuz they already had it in their mind after the incident that they're going to die, but wanted to give Asriel some happy memories before telling their plan for it-

and cuz chara's fave number is 9 and its the "highest number" thats why they kept count so it was kinda like, for them too- to die happy and with their BFF

because

and thats why Chara wnted to gather as many happy memories as possible to share with asriel before telling him the news about their plan to off themselves

so it wouldn't hurt him (or atl thats what Chara convinced themselves of)

and it wouldn't hurt Chara either cuz they are now holding "99 good memories" so they can't hold anymore cuz 9 is the highest number QWQ

I don't know- just some thoughts I wanted to share about this, and maybe spark up some conversations about this?

Also kind of off topic but now I can't stop thinking about just- Asriel maybe writing that for Chara to cheer them up cuz they were so sad

(maybe even post- the whole accidental poisoning the pie meant for Asgore??? since i headcanon that was the turning point for chara and why they considered offing themselves cuz of their guilt mixed with the self-hate and stuff)

But then Chara never saw the letter Asriel made for Chara telling them he still loved Chara and didn't blame them at all for what happened. And it was just an accident (since Chara obviously dies anyways)

I also can;t stop thinking of the implications that Asriel really did just innocently think because of DETERMINATION that Chara would be able to live for 999 years along with him (cuz Boss Monster)

Not realizing even IF Chara hadn't offed themselves early, that humans can only live up to 100 years or whatever-

[unweavinglies]

Something on Theorizing

I'm sorry if this doesn't wholeheartedly make sense, I'm sick but this has been bothering me for a bit.

So something I want to address is, the true nature of theorizing and what not. I think it's something that people often do not understand about Fan theories and theory crafting in general.

So I want to reiterate this point and hope to describe what I mean in hopes of getting people to understand it.

In short: If your Fan-theories don't read like at least a little like fanfiction, you're doing it wrong.

Allow me to elaborate:

When I have said in the past that the narrative is a spider's web of interpretations and I only hold a single thread of it, I mean that human beings are fundamentally imperfect. No single person in the world is going to understand a narrative the best--not event he author themselves, due to how imperfect we are as human beings. Everyone has grown up with their own unique experiences and biases, their own culture and customs. The moment you take your first breath, you are an imperfect human being with bias.

This is also true for the authors who create stories--because they are imperfect creatures like the rest of us, no story will ever be able to 100% convey it's message and themes. Some people will wildly interpret a core theme of a story beyond what the author had intended, because the biases of the author and the biases of their readers can vary so greatly.

And readers may take notice of things the author themselves never accounted for or thought about--an example of this happening (aside from this just, being a part of my own experiences as a creator) is when Toby Fox wrote a tweet expressing confusion as to why he created the character "Onion-san". A fan then came to interpret Onion-san's character to show how Monsters in the world of Undertale put on a mask of happiness, but are suffering from the cramped space and overpopulation for such a small space. How hard it was for Monsters to move to the city, and how hard it was to just live underground.

It was clear that Toby himself hadn't thought of this--because the prompt was his own confusion as to why the character existed.

So yes--I argue that even the creators themselves don't know their own work as well as fans think they do, which is why I almost never consider Word of God to be canon--because people change over time, their biases shift and curl, and the person you are now is now the same person that you were yesterday.

So if a creator cannot be expected to 100% know their own creation, themes, and what not, how can a fan know that?

The truth is--they cannot, and it is sheer arrogance to assume that your interpretation of canon is better than those around you. It reads, to me, that you have not come to the realization that you are indeed an imperfect being with bias, that you assume the world revolves around people who think just like you. You are not a theorist, you're just someone trying to win a competition that cannot be won because it does not exist. You bask in the pride of being "right" when everyone else is "wrong" despite your own imperfect nature.

Once you let go of your own arrogance, however, things about theorizing change drastically. You can appreciate things you don't agree with more, you can find love in your own work instead of hatred and spite, and you just more easily enjoy things overall. You can have fun with your own interpretations, discuss it with friends, laugh about it--and then, and only then, can you find your single thread of interpretation. Because you cannot find a thread in a tangled mess of a web if you aren't truly aware of what you're looking at--and you cannot see the web of a narrative if you are wearing a blindfold of arrogance.

And because you single thread of interpretation is inherently biased to you and you alone, that's why it should read as a creative outlet, like a fanfic, over something scientific or factual. You have your own biases, which means your own mind is going to read into something and read it differently than someone else. Theories can and should be creative, individual, and hell--even crazy, if you really want to just have fun with it.

So yeah. Those are just my thoughts.

[justmossyall]

egregiously long pinned post GO!

hi! the name’s claire. she/her, a minor, aggressively neurodivergent

a bit about me: i’m a christian, an author, an artist and an actor. i am obsessed with the fiber arts and am probably developing arthritis due to the many hours i spend embroidering. i’m a huge dork and love infodumping about my favorite things, so my asks are always open if you want me to rant to you 😎

the general stuff: no nsfw, don’t be weird, just remember that i am legally (and honestly mentally) a child before you say anything weird or are mean to me lol. also i have pretty bad anxiety and emetophobia, idk why that would ever come up but I figured I would mention it??? just…………….don’t stress me out or mention vomit ig????? bro idek anyways

side blogs because i have an obsession:

this is my main, a lot of reblogs about the things i like

my horrendous thoughts @justmossyaps

christian things @justjesusyall

art blog @justartyall

writing blog @justmosswrites

fiber arts 🤯😍 @justthreadyall

photography blog @raindropsonmushroomcaps

ask game! drama ask game! can you tell i like ask games! here’s a fourth one!

shows i like: gravity falls, arcane, bluey, bee and puppycat, amazing digital circus, toh, wandavision (not a marvel fan in general but i love that show), dance moms (don’t judge im a sucker for reality tv), and way too many kids shows. what can i say my mental age is like 4 (@person4924 and @sweetronancer know octonauts is where it’s at 😭)

movies i like: first of all i am a huge ghibli fan 😭 anyways the tinker bell movies, ratatouille, wall-e, the muppet movies, spiderman: into/across the spiderverse, brave, random 90s movies that I watch with my parents

books i like: psych im not listing all those, there’s way too many 😭 (kotlc and the scythe series are my favs though)

games i like: undertale/deltarune/undertale yellow (y’all should know by now how obsessed i am with that franchise), stardew valley, animal crossing, zelda botw (i have not played totk yet :( im hoping to soon though!), ddlc

artists i like: The Oh Hellos (if they have no fans i am DEAD im literally their number one fan), The Crane Wives, TV Girl, Jack Stauber, Laufey, Strings and Heart, RIDERS, AJR, Animal Collective, Toby Fox, Concerned Ape, Will Wiesenfield

special interests: undertale/deltarune/undertale yellow, embroidery/textiles/fiber arts, psychology (especially neurodivergencies, specifically autism and tic disorders), writing, gravity falls, arcane, bee and puppycat, the oh hellos, some very oddly specific medical stuff (mostly things like autoimmune disorders and the like, i just hate gore and tbh the cardiovascular system in general), kotlc, bluey, coding, linguistics/etymology, clowns for some reason??? girl idk don’t ask

i do a lot of writing, my first novel is actually fully drafted and i’m hoping to have it edited within the next 2 years so i can publish :) other than that main one + my other main-ish novel i have about ten million wips 😭

as mentioned above i am also an artist, i mostly just draw though i also embroider and dabble in clay and watercolor. my art blog is linked above so you can go check that out :)

i also do photography! it’s not a very serious hobby but i enjoy it, photography acc is also linked above.

i actually also make music???? lmaoooo yeah here’s my soundcloud it’s @\lofiwithsunny. i just write crappy instrumentals using soundtrap loops, but it’s fun and i think they sound pretty nice :)

i’m also an actor (yes i like to suffer creatively in many ways) so naturally i’m quite dramatic. i frequent the 😭 emoji and often use all caps. i love to sing though and i love music so if you have any cool songs you think i would like feel free to send them to me. OBSESSED with the oh hellos

speaking of which, my spotify is also @/justmossyall if you want to search me up. here are a few of my fav playlists ~ ~ ~

also as mentioned above, i am a christian! if you ever want me to pray for you or are curious about the faith, my asks and dms are always open :)

i’m completely obsessed with fiber arts omg if you embroider or weave or handspin your own yarn please please please be my friend

i am neurodivergent, suspected autism among other things (i’m not able to seek a diagnosis rn but i plan on seeking one when i can). im also having a lot of health issues recently. i’m not sure if it’s POTS, long COVID, fibromyalgia, or a combination of these things, or something different all together—either way, it’s been a pretty rough year for me. idk what’s up but it’s been a journey lol :’)

because of that (plus the fact that the subject overlaps with a lot of my special interests) there will be a lot of disability posting/reblogging here. i hesitate to speak up about it sometimes because im not professionally diagnosed with anything, and im a minor so i dont have much experience in life with these things, but i’ve got kind of a lot of stuff going on with me and it’s a subject im passionate about, so i’ll have a lot of stuff about that on my blog :)

honestly send me asks whenever you want, i am incredibly bored all of the time and love making new friends <3 literally rant to me about anything idrc but i apologize if i don’t answer for a while lol, i go through on and off phases of being on this site

i guess that’s about it?? love you guys have a wonderful day!! <3

[cogentranting]

Ranking 50 Disney Dogs pt2

Ranking all (ish) the dogs from Disney according to a very scientific process averaging scores on Design (how much I like the character design) Breed Alignment (how much they look like the breed they’re going for.. or just how much like a dog), Personality (how I much I like them as a character) and if applicable , voice acting (how much I like the vocal performance. [Disney Animation theatrical releases only-- no Pixar, no straight to home video, no partially live action] Link to part 1 What you’ve been waiting for! Or what you skipped to. The top dogs! 

25. Pluto THE Disney dog! Unfairly discriminated against by his peers of core disney cast! 

24. Boris the borzoi- Lady and the Tramp He’s a borzoi! Where else are you gonna find an animated borzoi?! 

23. Colonel- One Hundred and One Dalmatians  Did you know in the sequel book Sgt Tibbs (or his book equivalent cat) is declared an “honorary dog” by Sirius the Dog Star? So you can count him as tied for this place

22. Peg- The Lady and the Tramp A design with SO MUCH personality. 

21. Little Brother- Mulan He’s just so DIFFERENT looking from all these other dogs. I suspect that--like the horses in this movie-- he’s based off a particular art style and that’s why he doesn’t quite fit with anything else even within his own movie. 

20. Perdita- One Hundred and One Dalmatians  I was going to give you her Disney Wiki picture and say something about she’s the closest thing Disney has to a 50s housewife, but instead have this super ominous Perdita statue to rule over you. Bow to your Supreme Leader Perdita, for she is housewife no longer!

19. Toby- The Great Mouse Detective The quintessential Good Boy

18. Francis- Oliver and Company He’s Shakespearean and we love that. 

17. Napoleon and Lafayette- The Aristocats  I ranked them separately. Scored them differently in various categories. And they came out to exactly the same score. Inseparable. A dynamic duo. Batman and Robin who? These are the real crimefighters. 

16.  Goofy Is Goofy identifiable as a dog if you aren’t told that he is one? I don’t know about that. But he’s GOOFY. 

15. Pongo- One Hundred and One Dalmatians Okay I promise this is the last 101 Dalmatians character. 

14. Max- The Little Mermaid He’s what we call the breeder’s standard. 

13. Chief- The Fox and the Hound Am I trying to convince you to overlook certain aspects of Chief by choosing this particular picture? Who can say. 

12. Roscoe and DeSoto- Oliver and Company I love a good villain. And Dobermans. 

11. Tito-Oliver and Company Played and drawn with every bit of manic energy that a chihuahua needs

11. (Tie) Georgette- Oliver and Company “Perfect Isn’t Easy” was doing “Fabulous” long before Sharpay Evans. 

10. Jock- Lady and the Tramp A dog who suffers no fools

9. Bolt- Bolt His biggest flaw is that John Travolta was NOT a good casting choice. Other than that he’s adorable. 

8. Nana- Peter Pan This movie may be problematic but Nana certainly isn’t. 

7. Rita- Oliver and Company This dog is wearing eye shadow. And also “Streets of Gold” is criminally underrated. 

6. Lady- Lady and the Tramp I don’t really have much to say. She’s cute. It’s a good design. She’s a good character. 

5. Trusty- Lady and the Tramp Look at that action shot. His hero moment. 

4. Tramp- Lady and the Tramp I originally had Tramp 7th and Rita 4th... did I make a mistake switching them? Tramp doesn’t sing. Tramp isn’t wearing eye shadow. But Rita doesn’t have a song about her either...

3. Stitch- Lilo and Stitch He used to be a collie before he got ran over

2. Copper- The Fox and the Hound “When you’re the best of friends *muffled sobbing* having so much fun together *louder sobbing*” 

1. Dodger- Oliver and Company He sings the best Disney song. He’s voiced by Billy Joel. He’s got a celebrity endorsement: Chris Evans named his dog after Dodger. Easily the best Disney dog. 

“But Cogentranting” you say, “ you put two dogs each for number 11 and number 17, that means there are fifty-TWO dogs on this list. The title’s a lie” and I say WRONG SIr. Clearly number 3 and number 46 (Stitch and Obby) are NOT dogs at all. So there are Fifty! And you say, “okay but there are multiple dogs for both 50 and 49.” I have no answer for this. I hang my head and shame and bid you adieu. 

[29pageshomestuckeveryday]

Homestuck, page 3,297

[S] Wake.

Song used: MeGaLoVania by Toby Fox, with Tensei on guitar

Author commentary: Fef is the first to go. She suffers a similar fate to the eventual comeuppance of her scorned moirail. Is there deliberate relevance to this echo? I dunno man, to be honest, lots of folks get gruesomely bisected in this thing. If you want it to be true, feel free to believe in it. As you know by now, believing in things always makes them at least kinda true. Especially when I'm the one doing it.

There are only five towers on the Derse moon, compared to Prospit's seven. Prospit has one extra due to Sollux's binary nature, and Derse has one fewer due to Aradia's dream self being MIA from the get-go (because of her ghost). Aradia's mysterious dream self conditions, and the question of where she actually is, get addressed in a couple of pages. Only visually though, and the viewer must make some inferences on what is actually going on there. Not anymore though, because now you have me along for the ride to EXPLAIN THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF EVERYTHING!!!!! Oh yeah, also Dream Nepeta kicks the bucket, because it would be malpractice not to shoehorn in a little more dead Nepeta content.

There's a John arm there in the upper left, because why not. I didn't add them to many of the animations because it was more annoying to edit and resave Flash files than it was for simple GIF panels. But it also felt wrong to completely ignore the Flash pages during the retconned arm stunt. This seemed like a good place for one. Why? Maybe John sensed Jack's outstretched arm and thought he was going up top for a high five. It's established canon FACT that John doesn't like to leave people hanging, so let's say that's what's happening here.

We zoom way into the core of Derse to find Aradia's sleeping dream self. This is where she's been hiding all along. One simple visual provides so many answers and questions all at once, and since it's happening in a textless, rapid-fire animation, there isn't much you can do except sit there and take it like a chump, and start trying to make some inferences about what's going on here. That's okay though, I got your back this time. Having died long before they began Sgrub, Aradia is officially "the dead player," and Sgrub, in its unsettling state of all-knowingness, knew this about her as well and provided some structural accomodations on Derse from the very start similar to how it accommodated Sollux's binary nature by letting him be on both moons. We know that's a Quest Slab, because we already saw Vriska's in her Quest Cocoon. This one, however, is free-floating in the center of Derse's crypt, as if it were meant to hold a long-entombed corpse. The fact that Aradia began the game as a ghost seems to have resulted in a sort of "stillborn" dream self, or at least one that exists in a much deeper state of sleep than usual. Whether she's dead here, or in a coma, or sort of semi-undead...that isn't totally clear, and it doesn't matter much. The only relevant fact is that Aradia was going to stay put on that slab until exactly this moment. The only way off this slab for her is for the body to be consumed in this green inferno and resurrect as a god tier player. Note her robot self explodes as a result of the destruction of the dream self, just as the death of dream Jade established in [S] Descend. Even though Aradia is a very special case (there's nothing "normal" about beginning a session when one of the players is a ghost), and Sgrub accommodated her specialness in this way, this also charts a secondary path to achieving god tier status. We can then start speculating there are other ways of doing this even if the standard way becomes inaccessible (such as through death of the dream self). So when we find out Rose and Dave also manage to reach god tier in a similar way in [S] Cascade, it's an exciting development but not exactly shocking. The method they use was already seeded here. There are differences, of course. Rose's and Dave's Quest Slab ascensions should be regarded as more typical of how the game works, since they're "normal" players. The slabs are typically found in the core of the moon, not the planet itself. Also, the dream self typically is not lying on it in a sort of coma for many years in advance. They have to actually find their way down there and complete the ritual sacrifice. See also the Alpha Kids, who all utilized this method. They had no choice, since their session didn't even have a Battlefield, which is where you're supposed to end up if you do it the way John and Vriska did.

It's a whole new Aradia. Not a moment too soon, since frankly that robot bitch was a real drag. Just kidding, she was great too. All Aradias are valid. This one just happens to enjoy a major personality boost. A reinvigoration of her true self, due to not being dead, or doomed, or carrying around the baggage of the old, toxic relationships that resulted in her death. I see this form as a much more distilled version of her personality compared to all her other phases. Unwaveringly cheerful, exhibiting a fairly "normal" personality, and yet still as naturally drawn toward chaos, death, and destruction as ever. It's an odd thing about her. The only other troll who rivals her in terms of sheer delight and enthusiasm derived from destruction is probably Gamzee. You'd think that wouldn't be a flattering comparison. But somehow it works for her, says me. Crack ship, anyone? Please, don't sit there and act like I couldn't have made that work. You know it would have been great. There's something about her confidence as a god tier that seems related to her unflinching infatuation with death and destruction. Here she sees Jack bearing down on her and isn't concerned at all. She had the same demeanor while watching a black hole swallow the green sun and rip apart all of reality. She's completely fearless in this form.

A relentless, unshakeable sense of cheerfulness in the presence of horror is a trait Aradia shares with Gamzee. But for her, it's a positive thing. For him, it's negative. Why am I harping on this? I don't know, it's completely irrelevant. Just thought I'd point it out. After all, rams and goats are both known to be stubborn creatures. Did I actually intend for these two characters to have this in common? No, I'm not going to kid you about that. ("Kid" is a goat pun, and that was intended, so you're welcome.) Instead what I'll do is ram more quality analysis down your throat. ("Ram" was a ram pun, JSYK.) This is the third god tier we've been introduced to, and all in fairly rapid succession. One is a point, two is a line, three is a trend. So that means with this reveal in particular, the god tier stuff is starting to get very exciting. The story is paying out generously with it now, like a loose slot machine in Vegas, which makes you wonder how many more of these characters will reach this state. It stands to reason there will be more, due to the hot pace of these reveals. That assumption isn't wrong, but at the same time I tried to be somewhat judicious about not throwing too many of these out there, which would cheapen them a little. Shoving all eight human kids in pajamas by the end was probably pushing it a bit as it was. Still, as of this moment I'd say the mission is accomplished: your imagination has been successfully captured. Now you have a lot to speculate on. What do the rest look like? What are the color schemes, symbols, costume designs? Do you have enough raw material to start crafting speculative fan works, illustrations, OCS and such? (HELL YES.) Stoking the reader's imaginative fires in this way is every bit as much of the point of rolling out a system like this, as it is to serve the story's purposes.

Aradia shows off some powers. Turns out they're…time powers? What a twist. Then the animation flips an hour ahead, from the moment linked to the destruction of Derse, to another key moment. (Remember we saw Terezi crying and running off deeper into the lab at 3:14.) But suddenly it seems we have something else to associate with this timestamp: Vriska Time™.

Per the previous notes on Aradia, and extrapolating that perhaps achieving god tier status has a way of giving the player full license to be the purest version of themselves—that is, yoloing their best and truest life possible—then maybe Vriska is taking this idea to heart as well. God tier mode seems to bring something out of her. Like she feels empowered to fully tack into her role as a completely obnoxious, overconfident luck fairy. She's just capering around, taunting Tavros, and spreading her pixie dust. But unlike Tinkerbell's, this dust won't make him fly. Or will it?! (The answer is yes, when she throws him off yet another cliff in a few moments.) She didn't just become god tier, though. That happened quite a while ago, and she's simply been hiding it because she prefers her plain clothes (and more importantly, it would have been a spoiler). So this hyperactive fairy act seems more a result of the fact that she's currently wearing the outfit, rather than an extension of the powers themselves. Sometimes certain clothes and accessories just make you feel different. Remember how Kanye said wearing the Trump hat made him feel like Superman? Whoops, it was a mistake to mention that. I apologize. My youth pastor has a big smile on his face, and he's slowly shaking his head, as if to say, yes Andrew, it certainly was. And yes, I'm perfectly aware that I shot my youth pastor and he's dead now. I simply have him propped up on my knee, and now I'm operating him like a ventriloquist's doll. This is also a fact I should not have mentioned, and he is currently scolding me for that decision as well.

Here's little nod to Dave's strife with Bro, where he held up a decapitated smuppet to intimidate his opponent. The move is even less effective against Vriska as it was against Bro. She just taunts him back with his own useless pair of severed legs, which she clearly regards as a symbol for how she has a habit of repeatedly owning him, and this time will likely be no different. And also revealing to him that…she still has them for some reason? I think I made an inappropriate joke about that in the last book, and I'm being asked to apologize again. She wasn't even the one who cut off the legs. But a good thief doesn't let such a golden opportunity go to waste, does she? Maybe she even anticipated wielding the legs in a future moment just like this. The glorious moment where she foresaw herself vanquishing the loathsome villain Tavros once and for all. My hero. <3

This nifty little move Vriska pulls, and and how easily she pulls it, kind of proves how ridiculously outclassed Tavros is. Which also reveals how unnecessary the move was. Yanking the lance out of his hand, flipping it around with one hand in a split second, and then running it through the bullseye on his chest. (Which unfortunately somewhat reframes that symbol in hindsight as possibly being destined for this purpose, surprising no one because: Tavros.) If she did this, she could have done anything. Like, punch him in the face and KO him across the room for another nap at the bottom of the stairs? Or even if her intent was more brutal than that, she still easily could have stepped out of the way, smacked him in the ass, and sent him falling off the cliff without impaling him first. The pre-plummet impaling carries some additionally malicious messaging, obviously. Same deal as GAME OVER, when Gamzee did basically the exact same thing to Karkat (whose shirt also provided a couple of handy bullseyes to aim for). So why does Vriska do this? Later, she sort of admits that she got a bit carried away here. Everyone's all about to get carried away, now that we have just officially entered Murderstuck.

[cali-n-fae]

BPD vent 2

TW : drawn injuries, scars, s3lf H@r.m

after the cut.

This was drawn as a way to cope. And put here for all to see how certain crisis feels like, at least for me.

If you struggle with BPD, or any type of problem that would push you to S3lf H@r.m, please do not give in to the impulse.

I know some ways to cope are incredibly frustrating but it's worth it to use them. It's so worth it in the end. Ask for help. Talk to friends if you have some, talk with professionals, family, strangers on the internet, anyone.

Just know that, that pain you feel. That nobody can see. I know 's real. I don' t need to see it with my eyes to believe that you're in pain. I do not pretend to know what you're going through. Nor do I know your struggles. But if you tell me that you suffer, I do believe you.

Se.lf h@.rm isn't a solution. Nor is it a good way to cope.. You don't deserve to get hurt even more. Even if you feel that it brings you back to reality. Even if BPD tells you that you deserve it, 's not true. BPD feeds you lies. Distords reality. Blinds you. Haunts you with all your past mistakes and fears to remind you of how awful you are, even if you're at heart a very kind person. It mentally tortures you. I wish that pain to nobody.

But in the end the crisis always pass. The scars... They stay. That's also why it's such a terrible way to cope.

I hope, if you're in such pain or in crisis, that you'll find some inner peace soon. I wish you the best.

- Fae.

PS : Here I put a little website I found about it. I use some of the coping techniques in it. Like drawing. Cali tends to be on the sport side of things, running until her legs give up. To each their own. Once again, please don't give up.

PPS : I needed it out. But if I wrote something stupid, it isn't intentional, so please warn me so I can correct it and make it right.

Tons of love ❤️

Undertale by Toby Fox

Underfell by Vic the Underfella

[sylvyspritii]

An actual blogpost: Community management and social media for creative freelancers with mental health struggles

(Keep in mind that this post is slightly unorganised, in a way, this is a partial vent post, do not judge too harshly, thank you) Honestly, i want to do a bit of a longer blog type of post for once, i want to talk about my feelings, and about community management as a creative person online with mental health problems, and how difficult it really is to run a public community (for example a Discord), and how like, to be honest, sometimes, it's better if you choose not to do it, not every creative person online has to be a "personality", not all of us are entertainers, we create, that doesn't automatically mean we are good at online public social/community manegement stuff I think i realised too late about myself that i am not fit for a "community manager" type of role, i am a music composer (and artist) first and foremost, stuff like handling fights between random people joining your Discord server, or being hyper-aware of all kinds of drama, is not in my skillset at all, and i think a lot of other people are falling in this kind of trap where they feel like they "have to" have a big "personality" presence online and have to have a public Discord server I've chosen to kind of retreat from most social media a little bit, and i scaled down my public social presence accordingly, for example, i used to have a Twitter account with 2000 followers (i consider that a lot for a freelancer composer), and i deleted it because i felt like me putting out random thoughts on an account with a name that is supossed to have professional connotations was uniffiting, especially because it's so hard to delete everything on Twitter; your likes, all your replies, who you follow, everything is visible, even if it's 10 years ago, there is no privacy, and you need to be on your guard in order to preserve your safety and your reputation The thing is; social media encourages us to like, post a lot, and sometimes about stuff that honestly, is better said to friends than to your fans, and that's why i think it's really important to keep a lot of your thoughts and your opinions in private to your friends only, instead of on random Twitter tweets and on public Discord servers Now, imagine owning a public Discord server as someone who is trying to build up a serious professional reputation for freelance creative work and is suffering from a lot of mental health problems and, sometimes, emotional moments? It's a recipe for disaster, at least from my experience, your fans are not your friends, and managing and moderating a public Discord server and worrying about social media stuff is just, not for everyone, honestly, some of us (like me) just want to create, we want to make music, we want to draw, that's what we're good at, not all of us are "internet personalities", and honestly, that's okay I used to want to be like Toby Fox and ZUN, i have changed my mind a long time ago, i never want to become like them, they are revered, they are worshipped, people have such unrealistically high expectations of them, that everything they post online is analysed to an absurd degree, Toby Fox had to delete many of his old posts online to protect his privacy, and even those are all archived, nothing is sacred for people who are obsessed with you And people, THAT is why you should be careful, if you want to build a serious career out of your creative passion, then keep in mind that everything you tweet now, everything you post in public Disc0rd servers now, can be used against you in the future, you need to think about your reputation, and about your mental health, and take steps to ensure that you future-proof so that people cannot use your tweets / posts from when you are at your most vulnerable, or tweets / posts of opinions from 10 years ago that you have changed your mind on long ago already, and use them against you

(Sorry i had to screenshot that last part because Tumblr kept giving an error when i tried to post it normally) Sorry that this post is a little unorganised, i actually have a lot more to say about this stuff, but i'm just going to keep it like this for now Let me know what you think please

[solalunar-eclipse]

Love on Incognito Mode

AO3 Link

Rating: T

Summary: Click is doing great. His department is back together, his job is going well...that is, until he finds himself falling for the one person he can't have. His boss. But he's never been one to outright ignore his feelings, even if he can't act on them, so he's still going to try and get as close to his crush as he can.

(Or, a Browser history getting-together fic that’s about twelve thousand words.)

(Spamton and the world of Deltarune belong to Toby Fox, Linken and Avelyn belong to @pukeseven, and the other Addisons belong to @brightgoat.)

Click gritted his teeth, barely managing to keep from flinching as a massive green fork was thrust in his direction, missing his face by mere centimeters. The fact that it was not actually aimed at him only marginally helped matters.

Partway across the room, Scroll and Joy had both gotten into yet another argument, marking the second Pink-on-Pink fight this week alone. Thankfully, they were still mostly sticking to verbal attacks, but Click was still prepared to dodge in case any arrow-shaped implements started flying.

Sadly, he couldn’t leave—doing so would be seen as a sign of weakness, and that was something he could not afford to show. Besides, Ram and Curs hadn’t left the room either, and Click was damned if he’d be the first. So as it was, he just had to bear the latest spat and hope he didn’t become today’s collateral damage.

“Come now, Joyston, there’s no need to be such a brute about things!” Scroll sang brightly, his hands so tight around his fork that his joints whitened. “Just admit it, you know I should be the one to present our aggregated report to Her Highness this quarter!”

Joy’s eyes narrowed. “That’s just stupid. I’m the one who’s contributed the most, so it should be me. Besides, she’d never take a little food mascot like you seriously.”

Click did flinch this time. He could already tell that was the last straw for Scroll, given the way his grin twitched. “Why, you—” the beribboned Addison snarled, his grin giving way to something much more menacing…

…but before he could get another word out, the door slammed open, blowing most of the papers off the big conference table (which had been dragged to the side by Joy unceremoniously at the start of this showdown). A new voice, much more authoritative than either of the others, rang out. “Would someone care to explain to me exactly what is going on here?”

A green Addison stormed through the doorway, their long black coat flowing behind them. They tilted the brim of their ever-present hat up irritably, fixing both Scroll and Joy with a glower that seemed to make them both shrink several inches. Despite being some of the most powerful Addis around, they were still Addisons first and foremost, which meant that neither wanted to suffer a demotion. Click, meanwhile, simply half-smiled in relief, feeling his shoulders sag as some semblance of sanity was restored to the world.

“He started it!” Scroll cried, clearly eager to get the first word in. “Boss, he always says that he should be the one to present our report to Her Highness, but he has no right—”

“How dare you!” Joy barked. “You presented the report last quarter, so that gives you even less right than me!”

Suddenly, both had raised their weapons now, pointing them at each other in a way that made Click instinctively step backwards towards the wall—but then, Link (for that was the green Addison’s name) muttered a few words under their breath, and the weapons fizzled out of existence. 

Scroll yelped, and even the supposedly indomitable Joy startled in surprise. Link, however, remained impassive. “I’m the one who makes the rules here, remember?” they said calmly. “And the rules now say that neither of you can come within ten feet of each other, nor use any offensive magic, for the next twenty-four hours.”

“But what if we need to protect ourselves?” Scroll whined.

Link rubbed their brow irritably. “That’s what defensive magic is for. Learn how to use it.” they replied, and it took everything in Click to keep from giggling at the blunt remark.

Wait.

Since when did he giggle? He was a professional salesman, not some teenage schoolboy. 

As he dug the tips of his fingers into his palms to keep from showing his embarrassment, his boss turned to look at Ram, Curs, and himself. “You three are unharmed, yes?” they asked, a hint of concern softening their eyes.

The other two responded in the affirmative, but Click felt his words catch in his throat, the strangely gentle look he was receiving making his thoughts feel scrambled. “I, uh.” he began, struggling with his words strangely. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

His boss raised an eyebrow, but otherwise refrained from commenting. “Glad to hear it.” they said simply. “As for who will be presenting the report this quarter, it will be Curson, as per the schedule that I have already laid out.”

Curs smirked, but Click hardly noticed. As his boss had turned to face the group again, the lighting had shifted on them in such a way that the natural curve of their mouth seemed almost amused, and Click felt his vision tunnel strangely at the sight. 

Link said something else that vaguely registered as a mild admonishment, before turning and leaving once again, Click’s eyes tracking them all the way out the door.

In the weeks after that encounter, Click only found these thoughts growing further and further until (no matter how much he tried to pretend otherwise) he somehow found himself developing a crush on his boss. He couldn’t place exactly why—maybe it was how brave they had been that day, standing up to two pink Addisons…or perhaps how clever they were, or even just that he kept noticing little attractive things about them, like how soft their hair seemed or how good they looked in a turtleneck…

But none of that mattered. Because he absolutely could never, ever, actually act on these feelings (since they were quite literally his superior), and so he just had to ignore them.

And that would be just. Fine.

At least, that was what he managed to tell himself for the first month. But then, one day, Link just had to walk into his store, and it felt like his world had gone sideways.

It was clear that his boss was doing a surprise inspection of his store—a relatively routine procedure, really. What was less routine was the effect this had on Click.

If he’d had a stomach, it would’ve been all the way through the floor by now. He could already feel himself struggling to focus on the customers in front of him, his eyes continuously drawn back to the green Addison standing off to the side, quietly surveying the area.

Click wrenched his focus off Link with some difficulty and back onto his customers. He quickly resumed helping people find dating shoes for their perfect match, trying his best to be his usual perky-salesman-on-duty self, but it took a lot more effort from him than usual.

It was embarrassing more than anything, how much of an effect Link’s presence had on him. Multiple times, he had to fight not to trip over his words, and once he even found himself threatening to turn a bit pinker than usual as he gave his dating spiel to a customer. Thoughts of green fingers entwined with his own kept creeping into his mind, making his nonexistent stomach flip and his hands tremble slightly. 

Thankfully, he managed to finish his work just fine, and soon thereafter, Link walked over to Click right as the pink Addi was finishing off the afternoon rush. “Excellent as always.” he said calmly, his voice soft and slightly rough. “Nice work.”

Click was anything but calm, desperately trying to keep a violent blush from spreading across his face. “Thanks.” he said, fighting to keep his own tone even. “Nice to see you.” he added, and then immediately regretted it.

Yet somehow, this got the tiniest smile out of Link. “You too.” he said, before walking out of the store.

Click collapsed into the nearest chair, pressing a hand to his chest. He was exceedingly grateful that Vid and Spam weren’t around, because they would absolutely be making fun of him and his…honestly stupid behavior right now. Link had smiled at him! At him!! And suggested that it was nice to see him! The pink Addi let out a shaky breath, trying to steady his racing heart. How was he supposed to work when all he could think about was…was…… 

Then a few customers began to arrive, however, and so Click was forced to wipe the lovesick smile off his face as reality crept in and made him get up and get back to work. 

Later that evening, as he was making dinner, Pay said, “Oh, Click, our department mailbox got a report from Boss today! He says you’re doing very well, as usual. If you want to see all the details, I can forward it to you.”

Before Click even had a chance to respond, a chorus of “Ooooooooh”s rose up from the doorway. 

“Aw, that’s so sweet!” Video cried, mock-swooning against the doorframe. 

Click gritted his teeth, pointedly not looking at the yellow Addison.

Spam smiled, only a little mischievously. “IT’S OKAY TO [Admit] YOU’VE GONE [Ga-Ga] FOR THE [[Boss]], CLICK…”

“Shut up!” the pink Addison snapped.

Vid snickered. “Says the guy who’s redder than an overheating computer.” 

Click glanced at his reflection just long enough to see that yes, he was in fact blushing furiously, and immediately stormed out of the room. He slammed the door to his bedroom, locking it afterwards to make sure no annoying yellow Addis came looking to taunt him further. Link was a weak spot he couldn’t do anything about, and he hated it.

But Click didn’t hate Link themselves for it. He could never. It wasn’t the green Addison’s fault that seemingly out of nowhere, Click had noticed the fact that his manager was unbearably gorgeous, and clever to boot.

God, what he wouldn’t give to touch Link, for just one moment. Any excuse would do…

Click swallowed tightly, shaking his head. Sometimes, rarely, he would allow himself to fantasize, but tonight he actually had a little more work to get done. 

He flipped open his computer, scrolling through his “recently played” list for a movie to put on in the background while he worked. It didn’t take him long to find a new favorite of his—Luck of the Draw. It was a fun rom-com that he’d genuinely been invested in the first time he watched, and now he just liked listening to it and occasionally mouthing the lines to some of his favorite scenes.

About twenty minutes in, however, something made him pause in the middle of going over his user analytics.

This movie was an enemies to lovers workplace rom-com.

He cringed, even as he felt something oddly pleasant twist inside him at the idea of him and the green Addison….

No. That would never happen. The other Pinks would tear him apart, for one thing, and for another…Link probably had high standards. Click doubted he’d measure up to them, especially not when Link was so down-to-earth and he was, well, not.

He needed a different movie as a distraction. An old movie that he’d recently come back to with new eyes, Blazing Hearts, was the first one he thought of. Surely that would be safe. He’d discovered it ages ago, after all.

The moment he pressed “play”, though, he remembered that this one was a workplace romance too.

What was happening?

As Click scrolled back through his “recently watched” list in a slowly increasing frenzy, he was more than a little ashamed to discover that all he’d been doing lately was watching work-themed romantic movies. Had he really been that oblivious to his own preferences?

While he was lost in thought, the movie continued playing, catching his attention at the moment when the lead noticed her beautiful manager for the first time, complete with an orchestral swell and perfect lighting.

Click shivered and thought involuntarily of his own boss. How beautiful they were, how smart, how funny……

He melted onto his bed, simultaneously cringing at himself. Embarrassment and adoration raged equally in his thoughts.

How could I have become this pathetic? 

But don’t they deserve it? 

Yes, but—! I’m supposed to be the one making people fall for each other, not head over heels myself! 

Just think, though, think about how it would feel if only you could run your fingers through their hair…

Click whined pathetically, turning over to stare up at the ceiling. There was no denying it—he’d give anything for Boss to notice him in that way. But that would absolutely, unequivocally, never happen.

…

Several days later……

It was deep into the night, long after all the major businesses in Cyber City had closed down, and the only light was cast by street lamps and the smaller stores of the night shift.

Quietly, Link crept through the shadows, in search of something that posed a threat to every last one of the workers in their district. Recently, two Werewires had absorbed their wires long before they were actually mature enough to handle the various side effects, and the resulting aggression had caused them to lash out at everyone nearby. Thankfully, none of their Addisons had been harmed (yet), but they were determined to ensure it stayed that way.

The Werewerewires weren’t hard to find—they were loud and obnoxious, clearly looking to pick a fight. Well, Link was fully prepared to give them one.

Green Addisons weren’t the strongest type around by any means. That honor went to the Pinks, but Link wasn’t ready to throw any of their subordinates into harm’s way. Besides, while pink Addis were the strongest offensively, Greens had incredible defensive capabilities (they had to, after all, if they were going to deal with disputes amongst the other Addisons). Link highly doubted the Werewerewires would be able to do them any serious damage.

The moment they stepped out of the shadows, the two creatures charged, faster than they were expecting. They held them off decently at first, getting a few shots in early on, but the Werewerewires were clearly determined to hold their own.

Some electricity scraped by Link’s arm, slicing their sleeve and leaving a mild burn marring their body. They gritted their teeth and continued to fight, ignoring the pain. 

Before long, one Werewerewire was down for the count, and Link let out a sigh of relief. Soon, they’d be able to call in the Ambyu-Lances and get these two reinstalled with proper wires.

And that was their fatal mistake.

Assuming that the other Werewerewire would be temporarily cowed by their display of magic, they were instead caught completely off guard when the lone creature mounted a desperate charge, slicing deep into their side with its claws.

Link yelled as adrenaline blazed through their code, dampening the pain. Quickly, they rammed the Werewerewire twice with their shields, forcing it to its knees before they dealt the final blow to knock it out.

Gasping for breath as the rush subsided, they called the Ambyu-Lances hurriedly before staggering out of the alleyway, one hand pressed against their side where the pain was worst.

Desperately, they pulled out their phone, searching for the nearest department that might take them in. (In other circumstances, they would simply have stayed and waited for the Ambyu-Lances, but the antiviruses were going to have enough trouble with these two without having to take care of them as well.) 

Department 2-3 flashed up on the screen—the only department to all live in a single residence instead of completely separate apartment buildings. It was only two blocks away, and so Link steeled themselves for the walk ahead.

…

Click was lounging on the couch, resting after a long week of work, when he heard a knock on the door. 

“Who the hell’s up and out this late?” he muttered to himself, heading over to the door. He summoned his magic so it hovered just below the surface of his hands, in case it was someone who didn’t mean him or his department well.

When he swung open the door and came face-to-face with Link, however, he nearly dropped his magic entirely. But…something was wrong.

His boss’s eyes were strangely glazed over, and it took him longer than usual to react to Click’s presence. Link was, to put it plainly, weirdly out of it. 

“Uh…you okay?” Click said warily.

“My apologies for the intrusion.” Link said, his voice oddly mechanical and unfocused. “I didn’t know where else to—”

He took a single step forward, before instantly collapsing against Click’s chest.

“Boss?!” Click yelped, stunned. Quickly, he pulled the green Addison over to the couch, nudging the door shut with his foot.

He was about to ask what was wrong, but then he noticed that his hand was oddly…wet?

When it came away dripping in black, Click nearly screamed.

After a moment spent staring in frozen silence, he shrieked, “Spam! Get over here, now! Healing emergency!”

Seconds later, Spamton came skidding into the room, his eyes widening at the sight of Link crumpled on their couch. “[[Waste Removal]] THEIR [Free Coatroom!!].” he said quickly, his voice glitching worse than usual with the stress.

Click fumbled to undo the buttons on Link’s jacket, before staring in horror at the black slowly seeping across his entire chest.

“THE [[Shirts For Sale]] [Two].” Spam said, jolting the pink Addi out of his shocked state. His hands were already sparking with green, ready to heal at a moment’s notice.

Now slightly embarrassed, Click removed Link’s shirt too, revealing the gash slicing across his right side.

Click felt sick. Spam, on the other hand, seemed oddly relieved. “GOOD.” he said, making the pink Addi just about wrench his neck whipping around to stare at him.

“How is any of this good?!” he cried.

Spamton remained mostly calm. “IT MISSED THEIR [HeartShapedObject] AND COULDN’T [[DMG]] ANY CODE BEYOND [Quick And Easy Fix]. THE [Injury Claim]’S BEEN THERE LONG ENOUGH TO [[Leave A Permanent Mark]], THOUGH.”

“HERE.” he continued, summoning a bright green cloth and tossing it to the stunned Addison. “YOU [Top-Notch Healthcare] THEM WHILE I GO TELL [[Payday]] TO BOOST THE FIREWALL.”

“Me? What—” Click choked, but by then Spam was already gone.

The pink Addison stared down at Link helplessly, before gingerly pressing the cloth to his wound. Thankfully, it seemed to absorb the blood without a trace, and so Click set about cleaning the edges of the slice carefully. 

After a minute or so, the wound began to heal slightly, showing that Spam’s magic was doing its thing. He also took care of a scrape on the other’s arm that he’d noticed halfway through, which disappeared after less than a minute of attention. Soon enough, the green Addi became less and less pale, until he looked like he was just resting.

Not long after, the gash in Link’s side healed to the point where it was only a black line, and Click finished up by simply wiping away the blood that had spread across his boss’s body, more gentle than ever before.

It was only after he’d finished and his hands had stopped shaking that the pink Addison realized he’d just been touching Link’s bare chest for the past half hour. 

Immediately, Click turned bright red, before nervously laying the other’s shirt and jacket back over him and gently easing him into a more comfortable position. Quickly, he went and took a blanket from his own room (he always kept three or four lying around, just in case he was having a bad day) and laid it over Link.

Then, he rushed to his room, before spending the next twenty minutes absolutely losing his mind over what had just happened. Eventually, he managed to fall asleep, images of his hands on a green body swimming in his head.

…

The next morning, Link woke up to an unfamiliar room, jolting their senses from “drowsy” to “high alert” in seconds. Thankfully, a proper scan around the room revealed that this was just Department 2-3’s home—more specifically, their living room. They sighed, sinking back onto the couch.

Carefully, Link felt for the area where they’d been near mortally wounded yesterday, but found nothing except a thin line. This was absolutely fantastic, of course, although they did momentarily mourn the loss of a perfectly good shirt and jacket. Both articles of clothing were gashed and stained beyond repair, sadly.

They frowned, trying to remember what had happened after they’d found himself at the door to this house last night. With some embarrassment, they did recall pitching face-first into Clickon’s chest, but most everything after that was blurry or nonexistent. 

Except for one other memory…of the pink Addison carefully healing their wound with a quiet, focused look on his face. His hands were gentle, yet somewhat unsteady, but overall, it was the kindest thing any pink Addi had done for them, well, ever.

Link found themselves mildly stunned. Normally, Pinks were the type to delegate, and never got their hands dirty doing things like cleaning blood off of someone else.

And yet, for some reason, Clickon had set to caring for them without complaint, with a kindness that left Link reeling. They suddenly wanted to know more about this particular Addison—already they could feel themselves rifling through excuses to talk to him at a later point in time.

Suddenly, however, they found their thoughts interrupted by the arrival of this department’s blue Addison, Magson. He’d insisted on being called “Mags”, however, despite Link doing their best to remain professional with all of their departments.

“Oh, hey.” Mags said, gazing at them with a gentle neutrality. “How’re you feeling today?”

Link rose politely, inclining their head. “Much better, thank you. I’m terribly sorry to intrude on you further, but do any of you have a shirt and jacket I could borrow? Mine are ruined beyond all hope, I’m afraid.”

Mags smiled at them. “I’m sure we have something that would fit you. I believe Vid and I are both close to your size.”

He did, in fact, have some spare clothes that fit Link, and just as they were getting dressed, Clickon came into the room. (What Link did not realize was that he had spent the past half hour hogging the bathroom in a desperate attempt to look his nicest, in spite of the snickering outside the door courtesy of Video.)

“Hey.” he said. “Are you feeling okay today?”

Link was struck, yet again, by his kindness. “I am, thank you.” they replied.

But even that couldn’t compare to what they saw moments later. Click asked Payton if the firewalls were still up, but without a single ounce of superiority or condescension in his voice—only genuine curiosity and mild concern. Even when Videon appeared, mouthing something to the pink Addi that was clearly meant to enrage him, he merely flipped the other off and then went back to his discussion.

They were aware that this would still be considered the bare minimum of decency for most people, but when it came to pink Addisons, this was incredible. Clearly, he either had amazing self-control, or just…genuinely wasn’t as irritable as the other Pinks out there. Link was significantly impressed.

However, they did still register enough of the conversation to realize that it’d probably be best if they stepped in now.

“You don’t need to worry about protections.” they said, walking over to where the other two Addisons were standing. “I took care of the problem before coming here.”

Click whirled to face Link in a flash. “I’m sorry, you what?”

Link blinked, mildly startled. “There were two newly transformed Werewerewires causing problems. I knocked one unconscious before receiving this injury, at which point I defeated the other and then left.”

The pink Addi stared at them incredulously. “And you didn’t think to bring backup? Or to step out once you got a giant hole in your side?!”

“It would be irresponsible of me to put anyone else in danger—they were already too much of a threat as it was.” Link said, still stunned. Click’s sudden emotional about-face had left them more than a little bewildered.

“But you could have died!” Click cried.

And then it all made sense. Click was concerned about them. He wanted to make sure this didn’t happen again. Link felt strangely…warm at the thought. Nobody had ever felt worried about them before.

“If I ever run into another problem like that, I’ll let you know, alright?” the green Addison said gently.

“Hm. You’d better.” Click insisted, somewhat skeptically.

Link pulled up their mental list of excuses to learn more about Click and started adding even more on the spot.

…

Click was working the counter at Cyber Shoes IV—a much more casual store than usual—when the invitation came in. He opened it idly, taking a sip of his drink. It wasn’t even a full message, just an e-vite to lunch at a cafe on the Main Street…

…from Link.

Click choked on his drink, coughing violently. A lunch date? Platonic, to be sure, but still. A lunch date. With his boss.

He pinched himself, just to make sure he wasn’t dreaming. The pain informed him that he was, without a doubt, wide awake.

Click whined, covering his face with his hands. It had been hard enough to maintain his composure for just a little while when Link had been right there, in his house. How was he supposed to do it while sitting across from them, in a cute cafe, with only a small table separating them?!

Yet still, he pressed the “Accept” button on his screen with shaking fingers.

The rest of the morning seemed to vanish in a flash, the pink Addison only half focused on his job as he panicked without any sense of how to cope with this. He frantically closed down shop for his lunch break and raced across town, only stopping to nervously smooth down his hair and straighten his jacket in the reflection of the display window at the store next to the cafe.

When he walked in, Link was already sitting at a table, quietly perusing the menu. Even with the background noise of light chatter, the noise of his chair being pulled out still grated painfully to Click. He was, to put it bluntly, a nervous wreck.

“Hi.” he managed to choke out, sitting down with possibly the best and stiffest posture of his life.

Link looked up at him, smiling gently. Click’s hands trembled, and he folded them tightly in his lap. “Hey.” he said. “It’s good to see you.”

The pink Addi swallowed thickly. “…you too.”

“You can relax, this isn’t an inspection or anything.” Link said. “I just wanted to say thank you for saving my life the other day. I’m aware lunch isn’t exactly an adequate response to that, but it was the best I could think of at the moment.”

Click felt weak. “Saving your life? What are you talking about?”

Link frowned, confused. “You healed me, remember?”

“Y-yeah, but it wasn’t even my magic!” Click protested, embarrassed. Normally he’d be soaking up all the praise he could get, but in the warmth of his crush’s attention, it all felt like too much for him to handle. He’d never been the cowardly type, but something about genuine, unrestrained affection scrambled his circuits in the worst ways. “I’m not the healer in my department!”

“But you still stayed. You’re the one who remained by my side, so it’s you I wanted to thank in person.” the green Addison insisted. “I must admit, I was also very curious…I’ve never met anyone who would do such a thing for me before. Your behavior was…fascinating. Astonishing, even.”

Click felt his face burn. His ponytail twitched, and he combed it over his shoulder to prevent any further movement. “I—I just—you’re a good person. I didn’t want you to…be hurt.” he finished lamely, wishing he could articulate his thoughts better.

Link looked at him with a newfound intensity. “That’s very kind of you to say, Clickon.”

Aaaand there went the mood. “Don’t call me that. Please.” the pink Addi said, a new, less pleasant kind of discomfort replacing the old. “Click is fine.”

His boss hesitated. “My apologies. I’m sure you know that I try to be formal with everyone so as not to seem like I’m playing favorites, but you’re not the first to request that I call you by a nickname. And I suppose this isn’t a formal setting anyhow…but then in that case I must request something of you in return.”

Click’s clasped hands tensed. “Yeah?”

“If we are going to be informal, then that goes both ways. So please,” he said, leaning forward slightly, “call me Link, so long as we’re here.”

“Link…” Click murmured, stunned.

The green Addison’s eyes widened, and he sat back suddenly in his chair. “Oh.” he said, frozen.

Click felt nervous—that hadn’t been the reaction he was expecting. “What? Did I say it wrong or something?”

“No, it’s just…been a while since I’ve heard anyone say my name.”

And that was when the last little shreds of Click’s composure shattered. 

To him, his boss had always been the person who always knew what he was doing, as well as what everyone else should be doing to boot. Cool, formal, yet surprisingly gentle when an Addison did well at their job, he was a perfect yet distant manager.

Link had been doing all that on purpose, obviously, because Addisons were a notoriously competitive bunch. If he’d revealed himself to be at all open to friendship or communication, it would instantaneously trigger a downward spiral of sucking up that would lead to a total collapse of the hierarchy that he had to maintain.

But for the first time, Click began to truly register the consequences of this behavior. Not only did his boss have an insane amount of work to do, but he was left alone to bear it all, surrounded by nothing but subordinates and any other (equally busy) green Addis that might be in Cyber City. Click, living with an almost incomprehensibly supportive department that provided him with four ready-made and shockingly healthy friendships, plus all of his other forced social interactions with the other Pinks, not even mentioning all the times he’d made acquaintances with other Addisons beyond that…

…could barely imagine what it would be like to be that alone. 

Returning to an empty home at the end of each long and tiring day, carefully holding every single person at arm’s length, never sharing anything, never even expressing emotions beyond quiet approval or disapproval—

It would be like living in a world full of other pink Addisons, and Click shuddered at the thought. He felt furious more than anything—couldn’t anyone else see that Link was worth their time? Was he really the only one who had ever noticed how incredible of a person he was?

“Okay, what the hell?” was what came out of his mouth, and at this point, that honestly seemed to be as good a place to start as any. “How long, exactly, is ‘too long’? Because that’s a pretty goddamn basic thing that you haven’t been getting right there.”

Link seemed suspicious, but complied with the question. “I don’t recall exactly. My coworkers have been busy lately, but I’d say…maybe three months ago?”

“And that’s the last time you talked to someone that didn’t work for you?!” Click hissed. “What have you been doing for the past three months?? And I swear if you just say ‘working’ and nothing else I will break something, so that had better not be your answer.”

The green Addi looked almost amused. Something in the back of Click’s mind registered this and proceeded to squeal like a teenager with their first crush, but he was too frustrated to examine that properly just yet.

“No need to cause property damage, Click. I read, watch TV, manage my Twitter account, train occasionally to keep my magic up (though that is for work, I suppose)…and that’s mostly it.”

“So we have a grand total here of the two least social activities you could possibly do, plus some things for work. Fabulous.” Click groaned.

Link raised an eyebrow. “Do you always express your concern for people by yelling at and insulting them?”

Click suddenly realized that yes, he had just spent the past minute ranting at Link about his social life, despite the fact that it wasn’t really something the latter could control, and cringed.

Some of that must have been visible on his face, because the green Addi smiled. “Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate it. It’s nice to be challenged for once. I just didn’t know if you even realized you were doing that.”

“You like being challenged?” Click said, giving him a somewhat over-the-top suspicious look. “Now I know you’re not getting out enough. You’ll be sick of it soon, don’t worry.”

Link smirked at Click, making the latter shiver almost imperceptibly. “Somehow, I highly doubt that.”

…

Link turned out to be right, of course. The two were forced to leave their lunch before they’d exhausted their conversation, making a plan to meet later on that week and finish talking. One more meeting turned into two, then three, and before either of them realized what was happening they’d set up a thrice-weekly standing cafe date. Of course, as a result, the manager-subordinate barrier that had stood between them was rapidly beginning to break down.

However, this level of trust did come with some consequences. First and foremost among these was the fact that they were now leaving behind their workplace relationship and moving rapidly into friendship territory.

Link had, thankfully, planned for this to some degree. 

“Listen, Click.” he had said, more serious than usual. “You know that I can’t let this…what we’re doing here…affect our work, right? Because that could lead to us being forced to stop speaking to each other.”

The pink Addi sighed, disappointed yet resigned. “Yeah, I know.”

“I don’t mean to upset you…” Link added, seeming uncomfortable with the situation.

“No, you’re not upsetting me.” Click said. “I get it, we need to keep our jobs! And don’t worry, I can still be formal at work.”

“It’s less that which worries me and more that I will have to treat you with a certain level of distance at work, but I don’t wish to offend you with that behavior. Unfortunately, I can’t even give off the impression that I might be favoring you, and so I’ll have to behave exactly as I did before we began to talk outside of our jobs.” Link was speaking with increasing detachment and formality as he went on, clearly uncomfortable with the words he was forcing out of his mouth.

Click leaned forward, unwilling to let Link spiral any further into his distress. “Hey. You’re not going to offend me, alright? I promise.”

“Are you certain?” he asked hesitantly, seeming almost…hopeful?

“Totally.” Click insisted.

He was right, too. Link behaved as though nothing out of the ordinary was happening—so much so that it was genuinely impressive to Click. And true to his word, the pink Addison wasn’t offended in the slightest, instead actually finding a new level of appreciation in the feedback that Link gave him, knowing even more than before about how much thought he put into it.

Meanwhile, all of the other Pinks, who prided themselves so highly on being able to recognize potential relationships, didn’t notice a thing.

…

One day, Click received a strange note from Link. It just sort of…materialized in his store, as an actual note on physical paper. Weirded out, he frowned. He’d never gotten one of those before.

Carefully, he unfolded it to see a few paragraphs in Link’s perfect, neat handwriting.

Hello, Click. I hope you’re doing well.

Every year, all the department CEOs from every area on the Internet around the world meet for a party, of sorts. It’s rather fancier than anywhere else we’ve spent time together before, but I have a suspicion you might like that kind of thing.

We are each allowed to bring one other person, although I have generally abstained from doing so in favor of maintaining my neutrality. Quite honestly, however, getting to know you has been wonderful, and at this point I can’t really be bothered to worry about neutrality in this particular case when I could instead be inviting you to this event.

So here it is. My invitation. Feel free to accept or decline as you please, I won’t be offended if you don’t feel up to going. But if you do accept, I would be delighted. Just write your answer on the back, and it’ll return to me by noon.

Sincerely,

Link

Click put the letter down shakily, walked into the back room, closed the door, and covered his mouth with his hands.

And then he screamed as loud as he possibly could.

“Oh my god!” he shrieked, elated, barely even caring if anyone was around to hear him. “Yes! What day is it, I need to—god—like, celebrate this! Every year! Dammit, I need a pen—not that one, a cute one, where’s my sparkly pink pen, I need it now!”

Throwing open the door again as fast as he could, he fumbled around for his favorite pen and wrote YES across the back of the page in large capital letters. Then, realizing that that alone might come across as a bit too desperate, he added (i totally want to go with you!) -click beneath it, even feeling bold enough to dot his i’s with hearts.

Unfortunately, he was forced to get back to work after that, and when he next had a chance to look over at the counter, the letter had vanished. However, he soon discovered that something had been added in its place—to his private calendar, more specifically, where there was now an event listed for that Friday night.

Click suppressed a second round of yelling in favor of staring at the tiny event block for five minutes straight.

…

On the appointed evening, Link drove over to Click’s apartment building to pick him up for the event. They were, to be honest, extremely nervous. They’d never taken him anywhere this fancy before, and sincerely hoped he’d enjoy it. Normally, this party was a social minefield for them on their own, but they’d learned enough over the years to know who to avoid tonight.

With some trepidation, they took the elevator up to the proper floor, walked up to the door and knocked. Instantly, it swung open to reveal Pay, looking more than a bit stressed. “Hi.” he said. “Click’s…still getting ready. Sorry for the delay, he’ll be here in just a moment.”

Vid appeared next to Pay, grinning. “If by getting ready you mean ‘freaking out over how formal to dress’, then yeah, he’s ‘getting ready’.” they said, putting air quotes around the last two words.

Link’s worry melted away. It was so very Click to stress himself out over such small details. “Tell him that a straight tie is fine, and that he should pick…maybe his second or third-nicest jacket. It’s not insanely formal, but it is quite upscale.”

Pay sighed with relief. “Thank you. He’ll be out in a minute.”

True to his word, Click appeared shortly afterwards, dressed in a very nice suit with a deep green tie. Link felt warm at the thought that Click had dressed to match them. They did also note subtly that his suit was exceptionally well-fitted, accentuating his height and strength. It was well known that Pinks in general cared deeply for their appearance, but this was…on another level. It made him look even more self-assured and confident than usual, despite the evidence to the contrary just a few minutes ago.

Link gave him a half smile. “Are you ready?”

Click stopped in his tracks, looking stunned. “You…look incredible.”

Link, to their immense chagrin, began to blush. They’d never thought of themselves as exceedingly stylish, but they’d done their best for tonight. They were wearing a bow tie solely at the insistence of Avelyn (one of their very, very few friends), but the eye makeup had been their own personal choice. “I’m glad to hear it. It’s been ages since I’ve used eyeliner, and I feared I’d forgotten how it worked.”

“But not the eye shadow or mascara, apparently.” Click said, his tone sharp. “Stop selling yourself short, at least one person’s going to faint when you walk into that room.”

A snicker from the other room made the pink Addison stiffen. “Okay let’s go now.” he added quickly, practically pushing Link out of the room and into the elevator.

Once they got to the car, Link opened Click’s door for him, before walking around to the other side and starting up the engine. “Oh, by the way,” they said, suddenly remembering something. “I got you this. I didn’t know if you’d want real or artificial flowers, but I hoped this might be a little more unique.” They pulled an ornately folded pink paper flower (which perfectly matched Click’s own coloration) out of their cup holder and presented it to him.

“It took me quite some time to find the right shade.” they added, filling the silence somewhat nervously after Click’s lack of a response.

He ran his fingers along one of the petals, staring at it. “It’s perfect.” he said quietly.

Link sighed, relieved. “I’m glad to hear it.” they said, finally starting to drive.

On the way over, the two talked about small things from their week, interspersed with occasional questions from Click about what exactly this event was like. Link did lightly warn him that there might be a few rather stuck-up Addis there, to which Click replied confidently, “Do you really think any of them come close to the guys I work with every day?”

Link had smiled at him, hoping that was enough of a reply.

Once they arrived at the party’s location and got out of the car, Click’s eyes widened. “I think you might’ve forgotten to mention that this ‘party’ is in an entire mansion.” he muttered, staring up at the lights shining out of the stately building.

Link glanced over at him, worried. “If you’re having second thoughts…”

“No! That’s not what I meant at all!” Click insisted. “This is…amazing.”

“I’m glad you think so.” Link said warmly.

The moment the two stepped inside the entry hall, Click had already begun to beam. “Damn, you weren’t kidding when you said this place was fancy!” he breathed, doing his best to take in everything at once, from the ornate decorations on the walls to the beautiful dual staircase in the back of the hall. 

“If you like this, you should wait until you see the main room.” Link said, clearly pleased by how much their plus-one was enjoying himself. “First, though, I just have to take care of one quick thing…” they added, stepping over to a desk staffed by two other Addisons.

“Two from Cyber City.” Link informed them politely, waiting as they scanned the long list of names to make sure that the two guests were both actually invited.

“Cyber City, let’s see…” one murmured, before lighting up as she found the correct area. “Link, yes? And your plus-one…”

And that was when things began to go south. “Ah, erm—you’ve brought a pink Addison with you? From Cyber City?” she said hesitantly, giving Link a nervous smile.

They tensed up instantly, growing indignant on Click’s behalf. The pink Addi in question looked startled, clearly unaware of what was going on. The lady behind the desk shot Link a strange look, before leaning forward slightly. “Are you…sure he won’t cause any damage?” she asked, clearly trying to be quiet—but Click had clearly heard regardless.

The slightly pained expression on his face shot straight to Link’s heart in a way that was entirely unexpected, but they didn’t question it, instead turning back to the other Addison. Their eyes blazed with frustration that they didn’t even bother hiding, making the woman lean back slightly in surprise.

“Click is a wonderful person, and I will have you know that any and all rumors about his reputation are completely unfounded. He is neither violent nor dangerous—as a matter of fact, he is one of the most clever and thoughtful people I have the honor to know. There is absolutely nothing for you to worry about, and so long as there are no other problems, we will be entering the event now. Thank you, and have a wonderful evening.” Link snapped, so coldly it was clear they only said the last part as a formality.

As they began to ascend the staircase, Link noticed that Click’s eyes were wide, and he had a strange smile on his face.

“Everything alright?” they asked, making their companion startle and blink in confusion, before shaking his head as though he’d been deeply lost in thought. 

“Huh? Oh, yeah, sorry, I just…” Click smiled in a way that was almost…shy. “Appreciate you standing up for me like that. Not something that happens often, I guess.” 

Link frowned. “Well, you deserve to be defended as much as you need. I meant everything I said back there.”

Click’s cheeks turned an even darker shade of pink than normal at that, and he ran his hands through his hair somewhat shakily. He opened his mouth to say something else, but then they walked through a massive set of double doors, and he couldn’t do anything except stare.

“Oh my god.” he breathed, looking out across the massive opulent ballroom. “Oh my god, this is the most beautiful place I’ve ever seen! How did I not know about this?!”

The green Addi was pleased to see he’d forgotten all about the earlier stressful interaction in favor of fixing his eyes on everything from the crystal chandeliers to the astounding waterfall in one corner of the room. “I’m glad you like it.” they said simply.

“Like it? Like it?!? This is where I’m meant to be, Link!” Click cried, taking a couple of steps forward before whirling around to face them. “I want to live here!”

Link laughed softly, but didn’t notice the way Click flushed at the sight. “I’m afraid that’s impossible, but at least you get to spend most of the night here, yes?”

“Absolutely.” Click said, grinning at them with enough genuine delight to leave them stunned yet utterly happy.

They started out by scoping out the food and drink tables, eyeing the various options on display. Thankfully, the organizers tended to go all out for this particular event, so the food actually seemed pretty good, to Click’s delight.

As he left to pick up a plate, however, Link found themselves accosted by a notoriously judgy orange Addison—Glowon was her name. Somehow, just because of random chance, she’d been placed in one of the more upscale cities…which was probably the worst luck of the draw for everyone who wasn’t her. Not long afterwards, she’d essentially decided that if there was a higher being out there, then she was their personal gift to Darknerkind, and everyone else had better accept that fast.

“Hey, Link.” she began, and he felt himself stiffen automatically. 

Best to just get this over with… he thought, somewhat irritated. Did the night really have to start like this?

“Hello, Ms. Glowon.” he said. He’d learned the hard way that addressing her as anything less just led to her inevitable wrath, so he did his best to deflect it for as long as possible.

“Didn’t anyone tell you that monochrome eyeshadow is so last season?” she said, her voice horribly sweet. He didn’t even know why she still kept up the pretense of doing him a favor. They both knew she just targeted him because he was from a smaller city and the others would turn a blind eye to her misbehavior. 

“Really, my advice would just be to wash it off now. It’s not like you could look any worse that way…” she said. “...or you could just leave, and spare yourself the embarrassment of, like, existing? It’s not as if anyone else here would miss you.”

And there was the stinger.

Link inhaled deeply, doing his best to ignore her. He would have delighted in replying with his own barrage of veiled insults, but unlike her, he was fully aware that there were rules regarding decorum in place at this event. And as a boss from a smaller area, he got a lot less slack than many others might have.

“I—” he began, hoping to stave off any more interaction, but then…

“Well, isn’t that just the most hypocritical thing I’ve heard all day!” Click’s voice chimed from behind him. Link jolted, half turning in preparation to stop his plus-one before things spiraled out of control.

(Technically, Click was a lot less likely to get in trouble, this being his very first time here, but still…Link would’ve hated to see him deal with Glowon when he didn’t even have to get involved.)

That idea was completely foiled, however, when Click slipped his arm around Link’s shoulders, making him forget everything he’d been about to say as the Pink pushed onward. “Hey, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but everything you’re wearing looks like you dug it out of the back of your closet. And that’s not even because it’s out of season! I could rock that dress if I wanted. It’s just a shame everything you put on has to be dulled by those disgusting vibes you’re giving off. Natural beauty’s a real thing, you know, and you don’t have an ounce. So why don’t you just leave us be, alright?” he continued, leaning forward with a smirk. “I worked hard on this outfit, and I don’t need your whole…deal ruining it.” he finished, twirling a finger in her general direction.

Glowon stared at him for several seconds, before huffing and storming off. “You’d better believe my friends are going to hear about this!” she yelled over her shoulder, flames already threatening to escape the seam on her face.

“Yeah, yeah, like I care.” Click muttered, rolling his eyes. “You okay, Link?”

The green Addison stared up at Click, impressed more than anything. The gentle weight of his arm around his shoulders was incredibly comforting, and the way he’d stood up to Glow for him, unworried about the consequences…Link could hardly believe it had just happened. Although, he supposed he shouldn’t be surprised when it came to Click. He’d always been able to amaze Link, really.

…wait, what?

“Link, are you okay? Talk to me.” Click insisted, stepping even closer into his personal space. He shifted positions, pulling Link into a half embrace, and for a moment he forgot what words were.

Suddenly, the fact that he should probably speak before the pink Addi freaked out any more hit his mind, and he shook himself out of…whatever that was. “I’m alright, thank you.”

“Good.” Click said, stepping back, and Link immediately missed his touch. “Then why didn’t you say something to her?!” he cried.

Link smiled. There he was again, showing his concern with a side helping of extreme frustration. “By now, I’ve learned that there’s no way for me to stand up to her without getting in more trouble…although those same rules won’t necessarily apply to you. I suppose I should have asked you for assistance, though I didn’t want to inconvenience you tonight.”

“Damn right you should’ve. To hell with ‘inconveniences’, nobody gets to push you around like that without getting it right back from me and then some.” Click snapped. “Also, she’s an idiot who probably doesn’t even know lipstick from lip gloss. Don’t listen to anything she says, okay?”

Link felt so, so warm. “Okay.” he agreed, enjoying Click’s attention more than he had any right to.

“Now, I’m gonna go finish getting us some food, alright? Anything you want?” the pink Addison asked.

“I trust you to pick something good.” Link said, his voice soft and light. Click’s hands twitched, and his cheeks turned a slightly darker shade of pink.

“Cool. Yeah. I’m gonna…be back in a sec.” Click said, before walking back over to the table.

Once Click had left, reality began to sink back in. 

What.

Link felt a massive crisis coming on as several things began to fall into place very quickly, adding pieces to a puzzle he was almost certain he wouldn’t like to see finished. The way he always wanted to spend more time with Click…the fact that even just the lightest touch from him felt so good…not to mention how clever he could be when he put his mind to it…

Oh, dear god.

This couldn’t be happening, could it? Link had sworn to himself for years that he would never, ever consider any of the Addisons who worked for him as anything other than off limits. He’d promised himself!

And yet…Click…….

This was inappropriate in so many ways. Click worked for him, for heavens’ sake! Plus, Link was sure that he was at least several levels below the pink Addi’s standard for partners. He didn’t have Click’s energy, his extroversion, or his sense of style. Hell, he’d…

…well, no matter what, the right thing to do was to tell his plus-one immediately. The thing Link wanted to do (had been wanting to do, perhaps even had been doing for a while without realizing it) was to keep spending time with Click for as long as possible until whatever it was they had inevitably crashed and burned once Click realized there were better fish in the sea. It would only be responsible, however, to tell the truth and ensure that he wasn’t tricking Click into speaking with him just to fulfil some idiotic fantasy.

Link felt something in his chest crack, just slightly. It was almost funny, he mused humorlessly. Many people, upon discovering they were in love with someone else, would enjoy the feeling to some degree. He, on the other hand, had driven himself directly into the heartbreak stage.

This may very well end in a fiasco, but it’s the right. Thing. To do. he growled internally, refusing to let any feelings get in his way. No matter how wonderful Click was to be around, Link refused to disrespect him like this.

He moved towards the table, feeling sick and floaty. None of this even felt real, and he was grateful for that. More than happy, even, with letting the shock of so many feelings drown everything else out until he was done. This was the best way to handle things.

“Click, can we talk for a moment? Privately?” Link said, hating the waver in his voice on the last word. Click must have noticed, because he looked concerned and stopped what he was doing immediately. 

“Sure.” he said, still exuding confidence even in his confusion. It was so, so admirable—

No. Focus.

Link led him (without touching him, looking back on their earlier interactions in this new light made him feel disgusted with himself) to a room in a hall off to the side, his fingers interlaced tightly. It was decorated just as opulently as the rest of the mansion, with couches scattered around and fine pixel art on the walls.

“I have just realized something that I think you deserve to know.” Link began, closing the door and leaning on it in a moment of weakness, before forcing himself to move to the center of the room.

“I apologize for not mentioning it sooner, but it appears that I am not as aware of myself as I believed I was.” he continued, stalling just ever so slightly. Now that he was alone with Click, he could pick up on all the little things he’d previously dismissed as admiration or respect for the pink Addi’s positive qualities…as well as some thoughts he’d apparently missed despite them being clear as day now.

Click looked incredibly attractive—that was the main thing that had become obvious. Even confused, his slight tilt of the head was enough to make Link shaky. And good god did that suit look fantastic on him. Link felt like a broken record, but he couldn’t stop noticing it. He wanted to hear Click say something, comment with his usual sarcastic wit, but he remained strangely silent.

Link swallowed, and decided to just get it over with already. “I believe I have developed feelings of a decidedly unprofessional and romantic nature for you.” he said, with far less grace than he’d hoped. “I apologize if this is in any way unpleasant to hear. I assure you it was never my intention to deceive you in hopes of—well. Maintaining your attention. I am aware that our respective jobs make this expression exceptionally awkward, to say the least, so if you wish to stop speaking to me, I would fully understand and do everything in my power to help you in that endeavor.”

Link felt sick. He’d only just discovered his feelings for Click, and he hadn’t even given himself a mere second to enjoy them. Although, when said feelings were for a person that worked for him, he reminded himself that it would be downright wrong to attempt to enjoy them in any capacity. 

This was the best way to handle things.

And then, out of nowhere, Click said, “So what you’re saying is…you like me. Romantically.”

Link blinked, confused. “Yes. That is in fact exactly what I just said.”

“Am I dreaming?” Click asked next. “Either that or I’m drunk, right?”

“As far as I’m aware, you are neither of those things.” Link said. “Unless you somehow managed to drink a lot of alcohol in the minute and a half we have spent apart so far this evening, which I strongly believe did not happen.”

“So this is real, then.” Click said.

And just as Link was beginning to realize that this was all probably because Click didn’t want to believe that this was happening, making him feel even more disgusted with himself than before, the pink Addi began to yell. 

“Oh my god?!” he shrieked. “Did you just imply that I would be anything less than freaking thrilled to find out you like me?!? Because I am!”

“You’re—I’m sorry, what?” Link said, feeling like the conversation was decidedly out of their control now. “Did I miss something here?”

“Apparently, yes!” Click cried. “You missed the massive goddamn crush I’ve had on you for the past, I don’t know, few months!?”

“You—you—” Link sputtered, completely thrown off. “One moment, are you saying that you would like to be in an illicit romance with me?”

“Uh, yeah? Why wouldn’t I?” Click asked, genuinely seeming not to have thought that there could possibly be any downsides significant enough to stop him from dating his boss.

Link’s heart was pounding. “Well, I mean, if you’re not against the idea…I can’t say I would be either, I just—wouldn’t that be irresponsible?”

The pink Addison smirked at that, moving closer until he was fully in Link’s space. Their faces were barely inches apart. “Hey, I’m asking for it, aren’t I? You’re not making me do anything I don’t want to, Link.”

They felt their resolve weakening more and more by the second. As a matter of fact, they wanted this just as much as he did. It just felt right…and if Click was so determined, then who was Link to say no to that? “Well then.”

Link cleared their throat, before looking directly at their crush (did it ever feel good to think that). “Click, will you go out with me?”

Click choked back another scream with his hand, instantly losing all composure as his eyes widened. “Yes!”

“...so, uh, does that mean I get to, like, kiss you, or…?” he continued, twirling his ponytail with one of his fingers and blushing furiously. 

Link was stunned. Click, nervous? Because of them? Until just a few moments ago, they wouldn’t have believed it. Now, though…

“I don’t see why not.” they said, giving him a small smile.

Click’s ponytail stood straight up, his eyes wide—

—and then suddenly, he was kissing Link.

He was surprisingly gentle, lightly brushing the green Addi’s jaw with his fingers. His touch made sparks reverberate throughout their body in a way they’d never felt before, leaving them stunned. 

Oh, right, I should probably kiss him back.

Link pressed into the kiss slightly, and Click jolted before moving his other hand to the back of Link’s head in an attempt to pull them even closer. But all too soon, they both had to break away and catch their breath.

Link was certain their face was bright pink, and Click looked to be in a similar state. He couldn’t seem to stop looking at them, his eyes flickering all over their body.

After a moment, they realized that Click was actually beginning to panic a little, muttering “ohmygod” repeatedly under his breath. They stepped closer, taking his hands in an effort to snap him out of it.

“Hey, just relax, alright?” they said gently, smiling up at him. “It’s just the two of us, there’s nothing to worry about here.”

The pink Addison let out a breathy laugh, clearly on the verge of losing it. “Relax? When the person of my goddamn dreams just asked me out and then kissed me? That’s a little harder than you make it sound, Link.”

They blushed, but refused to break eye contact. “Well, if you’re so determined to feel that way, then you might as well kiss me again, hm?”

Click made a strangled noise and then pulled Link against him, diving back in for a second kiss.

A second turned into a third, and then a fourth—Link almost thought it would never end (in the best way), but then Click stepped backwards, fumbling with the buttons of his jacket. “The hell is it so hot in here all of a sudden?” he growled, his shaky fingers struggling to get a grip on anything.

Smoothly, Link stepped forward, undoing the jacket and easing it off Click’s shoulders in one fluid motion. They reached for his tie next, before pausing and looking up at him. “Is this alright?” they asked.

“Y-yeah.” he managed to say, before choking back a gasp as the green Addi’s fingers accidentally brushed his throat. “Easy there…” he breathed.

Link smirked and pulled Click’s tie the rest of the way off, tossing it onto the nearest piece of furniture. Seconds later, Click was tugging at their jacket lightly, asking, “You need any help with yours?”

“Certainly.” they said, finding it a little harder to speak in multi-word sentences when it was his hands on their body.

As Click eased their jacket off, a memory came to them suddenly. “Hm.” they mused. “That’s much nicer than the last time you had to do this.”

The pink Addison’s fingers stuttered and stopped, the air in the room suddenly feeling heavy. “Sorry. Wrong time.” Link winced, disliking the change in mood.

“No, it’s fine. It’s what started all this, yeah? Just wish it didn’t have to come to you bleeding out on my couch for us to get together.” Click said, removing their jacket the rest of the way.

Link smiled. “You know…I honestly don’t mind. If that’s what it took for me to meet you properly, then it was worth it.”

Click blushed yet again while undoing Link’s bow tie. “Would you cut that out already? I’d like to at least pretend I’m being cool here, okay?”

“You don’t have to pretend to be anything with me.” the green Addi said, just as Click pulled their bow tie off.

Seconds later, this earned them another kiss, deeper than any of the others the two had shared so far that night. Link pressed back into it with equal fierceness, loving both the way it felt and Click’s reactions to the little things they did. Every time their fingers brushed his ponytail, his body trembled and he clutched even more feverishly at their shirt, earning him more caresses in return.

The green Addi didn’t even realize they’d been moving until Click’s legs hit the back of a couch, leaving him sprawled across the cushions. Link held themselves over him in an attempt to keep from falling down, bracing one hand on the back of the couch and the other on his shoulder.

“Geez, Link, how many partners have you had before me?” Click asked suddenly, his voice pitching up at least an octave.

“None, actually. Why?” Link asked curiously.

“What?!” Click shrieked, recoiling slightly backwards into the couch. “How the hell are you this good, then??”

Link frowned, about to ask for clarification, but then they noted how warm Click felt all of a sudden. As a matter of fact, they could faintly feel his pulse racing in his chest. His eyes flickered to the place where they pressed him against the furniture, his breath catching at the sight.

“I see.” Link said, pleasantly intrigued by how much Click seemed to be enjoying this particular…situation. He frowned in confusion, dropping his guard for a second—but then turned an almost impressive shade of red.

“No, you don’t! Shut up!” he cried, clearly embarrassed.

It was clearly time for some sort of damage control before the pink Addi could begin to panic. He’d been on the verge of it this whole time, and Link wanted to fix that. Now.

“Click, it’s really okay. I’ve learned by now that you don’t like to express your true feelings publicly, but we’re not in public right now. And I need you to know that I would never, ever judge you, understand? This is incredible. You’re incredible.” Link insisted.

Click finally managed to meet their eyes. He must have liked what he found there, because he began to smile sheepishly. “Sorry…thinking just kind of goes out the window when it comes to real romance. Normally I’m better at this, I swear, but you’re…you, y’know?

“Ugh, sorry. Don’t know where all that came from.” he added, realizing how sappy that sounded. “Just ignore that, I—” 

“No.” Link said softly. “Remember, you don’t have to be anyone else for me, Click. Just be you.”

“Aaaaargh, stop!” he wailed, practically trying to crawl backward into the couch. “Cut it out with the genuine feelings stuff, I can’t take this much in one night!”

“Would you prefer we kept kissing, then?” Link said, giving him their most genuine smile.

“Oh, hell yes.” Click breathed, already pulling them downwards.

Suddenly, though, the noise of people talking in the hall outside made them both break apart nervously, despite the fact that nobody seemed to be even trying to enter the room.

Once the voice had passed, Click took hold of Link’s jacket again, making sparks shimmer in their heart—but sadly, they knew they couldn’t continue, and so they pressed a hand to their companion’s chest to halt his movements.

The green Addi sighed reluctantly. “I wish we could keep going, but I’m afraid that just may not be possible. I’m required to spend a certain amount of time present,” they explained to Click, “so we can’t stay here for much longer.”

His expression turned distinctly irritated at that, and…was he pouting? Link smiled. With anyone else, that would have seemed incredibly juvenile, but with Click it was honestly a bit cute.

“Don’t worry.” Link said, tilting Click’s head up lightly. “It’s not as if we’re going to stop being together after tonight.”

The pink Addison’s eyes widened. “Wait, really?”

“Click. Did I not formally ask you out earlier? What about that suggests a one-night fling to you?” Link asked. 

He grinned nervously. “Yeah, yeah…I guess I still kinda feel like I’m dreaming.”

“I understand. This is equally wonderful for me, but allow me to assure you that you’re not.” Link murmured. Then, however, they stood up for real this time, retying their tie and putting on their jacket quickly. “We really must be going, though, or else someone will come looking for us.”

Click groaned unhappily, but began to redress himself anyway. The moment he’d finished, however, Link took hold of his tie just long enough to kiss him lightly on the cheek. “Thank you for being so good about this, Click.” they said, meaning every word.

The pink Addison blushed. “Anytime.” he managed to say, reaching for Link’s hand.

They accepted, but then hesitated nervously. “I’m sorry, Click, but I don’t think it’d be safe for us to be…affectionate in public. I could lose my job, but you could be reassigned, depending on the consequences.”

Click looked at them, bewildered. “You say that like it’s worse for me than it is for you.”

“Well, I’d hate to see you separated from your department.” Link said. “From what I can tell, you…five? have something special.”

“And I don’t want you to lose your job.” Click insisted. “So don’t worry, I get it. Only hold hands under the table.” He smirked.

Link laughed quietly. “That sounds good to me.”

Finally, they left the room to go get some food. After two aborted attempts, they now stood at the table for a long time, just enjoying being together even for something so mundane as picking out what they wanted to eat. Once they’d finished with that, they even danced a little together, although mostly they simply savored every moment spent in the other’s company. 

Eventually, after dodging several more suspicious social interactions with plenty of help from Click, Link began to feel a little worn out from all of the events this evening.

“Would you like to go home soon, or would you prefer to stay longer?” he asked, gently pressing a hand to Click’s arm.

“I don’t know.” he said. “I’m getting kinda tired of all these idiots, but I don’t want to stop being with you…”

Link flushed, smiling slightly. “We work in the same district, Click. We’ll have so many more chances to see each other.”

“Fair.” the pink Addi murmured, gently placing his hand on Link’s.

Link drove him back to his house amid lots and lots of distraction on Click’s side, doing everything from holding his hand to trying to kiss him just as the light turned green.

“Click, do you want me to crash the car?” he’d asked eventually, unable to stop smiling.

“No.” Click muttered, sulking without malice.

However, once they made it to the pink Addi’s building, Link followed him to the door, much to his surprise.

“Don’t you have to get home too?” Click asked.

“Well, yes,” Link said, “but wouldn’t it be rude for me to leave without a kiss at the door?”

Click stared at him. “…I’m still sure you’ve actually been in a relationship before and you’re just messing with me.”

“I assure you, I have not.” Link insisted, already pulling the Pink closer.

Gently, he pressed a soft kiss to Click’s lips, before stepping back. Click looked dazed but happy, caressing Link’s hands lightly.

“I’ll see you again soon.” the green Addi murmured, unwilling to speak any louder lest he shatter this moment.

“I can’t wait.” Click sighed.

“And thank you. For a wonderful time.” 

“Anytime.”

Just before Link got into his car, he looked back to see Click watching him, touching his mouth almost incredulously.

He waved almost shyly before sliding into his car, and driving home, feeling wave after wave of exhilaration unlike anything he’d ever experienced before.

It had only been a few minutes and he already couldn’t wait to see Click again.

[kindestegg]

Deltarune Theory: Ralsei is a guide for the script

It feels crazy that Deltarune Chapter 2 has only been out for like, what, two weeks? As of the time I’m writing this, and yet, there has already been so much secret hunting and speculation over this. Not even the full game, and people already go crazy over it. Naturally, I am part of this craze. In fact I was one of the people that played it as soon as it dropped.

And, I thought it was only me, but, at least for a little while, Ralsei’s behavior struck me as… odd. Not outwardly malicious, but just… odd. Particularly the first bit of the game, it was just so… happy and convenient? And Ralsei was at the center of it all, orchestrating it, making sure everything happened accordingly.

Eventually, that initial feeling of distrust went away, but… not quite. And it seems a lot of people began to feel the same way, pointing out bits about Ralsei that are just… out of place. Things that didn’t seem to stand out in the first chapter, are now popping out about him.

Questions include:

How does he know about what’s outside the Dark World, about the school?

How does he know about the game mechanics and call them out by names?

Why is he so interested in keeping the balance between only Kris acting and him and Susie doing magic?

Why does he seem so eager to dismiss what happened with Spamton NEO?

Why doesn’t he turn into stone or even get weak at any point during the time he spends in Cyber World?

Are the parts of his name and design connecting to the Dreemurr’s intentional, and if so, what does that mean for his relation to Kris?

How and why does he take player control away to look at what Susie is doing? Why must he wait until Kris is willing to do it? What does he tell them when he succeeds in this?

Now, I don’t intend to pose here “a supreme theory to rule them all”, I’m just a guy having fun and I’ve seen people voice particularly similar ideas to this one I’ve had, so I want to at least try to answer these questions through a relatively simple idea that would, almost entirely, immediately answer ALMOST all the doubts.

First, let’s start with some steps to build up this idea. For one, we know for a fact that Ralsei holds knowledge over game mechanics and may even break the fourth wall at times.

But we also know that Ralsei’s design resembles a lot of characters from Undertale we know and were fond of. For one, he can be likened to Toriel in the sense that he is the one to give you the first tutorial of the game and his clothes resemble her original outfit as well. Another connection, much more common, that people have made is that he is like Asriel, no doubt due to his name being an anagram, but also due to the fact he is also a cute young goat.

I would like to do a complete turn around here though, and say I do not think any of this points to Ralsei being related to Kris in the familial sense, for more than one reason, but my main one being that I don’t think Toby would be as frankly disgusting as to imply such a thing when there is so so much teasing in the direction of Ralsei possibly having a crush on Kris. I mean… really, Toby?

You know, I’m not too sure this would be the smartest idea, Mr. Fox, but alright.

However, I do think all these hints in his design and name have a purpose. And it has to do with how us, the fandom, see these two characters. For one, they are very beloved characters, and Toriel is one that we associate with her tutorials and guidance, whereas Asriel is one that people have yearned to see more in action. They are back, in a sense, but not present in our adventures so far.

What I’m getting at is that Ralsei is specifically designed to be the darling of the fandom. He is made to be loved, to be trusted, to cause feelings in us that make us want to protect him and accept his advice. This, in a way, also affects the in-universe characters who see him, as Susie put it: “as a big portable teddy bear”, whose job is “giving hugs”.

And I don’t just mean this in a character design way, like “oh wow Toby was so smart to make a perfectly marketable boy!” No. I think Ralsei exists as a meta element, his form being a direct manifestation of what we want to see.

He looks like that because he wants us to see him and lower our guard and expect his guidance. Remember how his form was shadowy and vague throughout all of chapter 1 until the very end of it and how he poofs into nothing but a pile of clothes in both chapters so far, no matter what form he’s in? What if he’s a shapeshifter? What if Ralsei isn’t even his real name? That certainly would explain why he says he doesn’t know what being Ralsei-like is like.

Ralsei? Ralsei? Oh God he’s gone.

Now, do I think he’s lowering our guard in the sense of leaving us vulnerable for an attack? Not exactly. I think it's so we learn to accept him…

Accept that he is a GUIDE for the game’s script. His entire existence hinges on guiding the main characters, specially Kris, throughout the story, and making sure the whole story, all seven chapters, play out exactly as planned.

You see, Ralsei isn’t evil. His goal is pretty simple, actually: guide us, the player, throughout the game, making us feel as safe and happy and secure. In that sense, of course he pushes so hard towards the pacifist route. After all, that’s the one that’s closer to a completionist route, as the sparing + recruiting mechanic adds more characters to your town, and therefore more content. He wants you to see all this content and get the most enjoyment out of it. His code urges him to bring you the best experience possible.

This would also answer why he does that thing with taking our control away from Kris and to watch Susie’s shenanigans. Because it’s satisfying to us. Notice how stressed out and pushy he gets in the alternate route when Susie comes out of Noelle’s room without being able to let us see what happened. He knows he messed up, something went wrong. He was supposed to let us see, so that we wouldn’t be bored, because God forbid the players be bored.

Just imagine this going through his head.

He also seems to genuinely care about Kris and Susie, and with good reason, as he knows these are the protagonists, and he is supposed to care for their well being too and ensure they reach their goal. I do think, however, there is a good amount of being genuine in his care, as he has no reason to react so boldly sometimes to either of them, showing outrage or affection in pretty telling ways. He isn’t heartless despite carrying out this job.

However it is also worth noting, for all his care, he cannot do the one thing that Kris would desire the most: free them from our grasp. And that is his ultimate failure towards them, and may end up creating conflict later on in the game.

From, here, there are two possible pathways:

Ralsei does not know about the dilemma Kris is going through, and believes Kris is entirely oblivious and passive towards being in a video game. He may even end up being the final boss to fight, as he desperately tries to keep everything on rails while Kris very much does not care for any of that.

Ralsei is entirely aware of what’s going on with Kris, after all, everything in a game’s design is planned, even the cutscenes, therefore even Kris’ struggles. Ralsei knows of the fate that lies ahead, that Kris will eventually be free, how it all ends. But to get there… is still a road ahead.

I think Ralsei’s affection towards Kris will definitely be explored in the later chapters. Not just because of the teasing we’ve been getting, but, if Ralsei really is a guide of the game’s code and script, what would that mean for him to get so attached towards the character the player is controlling?

Ralsei will have to make a choice. He will either recognize Kris is suffering and cannot wait any longer, or be faced with possibly having to fight them himself. This is why those two pathways matter as well. If he doesn’t know, his choice will come later and it will be an unpleasant surprise for him to find out the game universe is breaking apart around him with the self awareness of certain characters. If he does know, however, his choice is NOW, and waiting for the inevitable will be torture.

Just how long until he breaks? Or will he keep the facade until the very last chapter?

Like I said, I don’t intend this theory to be the biggest, most revealing and coherent theory. But… It could add a very interesting layer to Ralsei’s character, as well as answer many questions posed beforehand. He knows the school layout and game controls because he is part of the code. He can get to the other Dark World’s easily and remain unharmed because the game demands him to be. He looks like this so that we love him. He wants to give us the most fulfilling Castle Town so that we will love the game. He doesn’t protest even when Kris does things like try to give him the thorn ring, because to him, everything will be okay anyway. Everything he is, is for us. He isn’t evil or malicious per se, he just opposes Kris’ biggest need.

But he may have gotten himself attached. And that may be a clue to sparing him if he does become a final boss.

But! Tell me what you thought of this theory! Do you think it’s way too weird and farfetched, or do you think it’s possible that it could happen? Or maybe you agree with some stuff but not with other stuff? Go ahead and tell me!

[simhuman]

Undertale in Famitsu Magazine - Translation of Toby Fox’s Comments

Thanks to @lennyclover​ for the beautiful job editing job to match Famitsu’s page layout!

Toby Fox provided Famitsu Magazine with plenty of thoughts for Undertale’s 5th Anniversary cover feature. Famitsu translated his writing to Japanese, and I’ve brought his comments back to English. How much was lost in translation tennis? We may never know.

Full plain text version for screen readers under the cut.

In advance of the anniversary, we have messages for you from 8-4, who produced the Japanese localization, Fangamer, and the game's creator, Toby. 

From 8-4: It's been five years since Undertale's release, and three years since the Japanese version went on sale. It seems like just yesterday we started working together to prepare the Japanese edition. The existence of Undertale became a great opportunity for our company, and we want to keep loving it with all of you. At this time that COVID-19 is making people worldwide suffer and the risk of expanding spread is high, large events can't be held, but we're hoping for a future chance to safely celebrate with everyone.

From Fangamer: Congratulations for Undertale's fifth anniversary! Fangamer happened into making Undertale merchandise by way of Toby and one of Fangamer's members becoming friends over ten years ago on a MOTHER 2 [Earthbound] fan site. Thanks to that, we've been not just business partners, but people sharing the same ambition to make fun goods. May we continue to create new goods together!

From Toby: Five years have passed since Undertale came out. When I was making this game, I thought it would probably be forgotten after a month. After all, it was only the accumulation of my ideas, and the songs I sang in the shower, and my doodles in my class notebooks. And yet somehow, five years later, these dreams of one single dog still resonate in people's hearts... I'm grateful. Frankly, I wouldn't be surprised if people continue to say "Toby Fox's greatest work is Undertale," and I won't mind. Even so, I'm very fond of the new game I'm working on, and of the people who have played it so far, some must have liked it as much as I have. I'm looking forward to those people's responses.

P.S. Getting published in Famitsu doesn't feel real to me yet. I don't think it's imposter syndrome (where you can't believe in your own abilities), but... Isn't it a little strange to let me eat at the table with everyone, even though I'm a dog!?

Toby's Influential Games

There are so many games that influenced Undertale, it's impossible to name them all... To everyone waiting for Deltarune to be finished: While you're waiting, why not try playing some of the games that influenced me? 

MOTHER series:

"The games that influenced me most! I can't think of anything else to say... 1, 2, and 3 all have their own charms, but I recommend playing starting with 2 [Earthbound] because it's the least difficult. Okay? Don't forget, 'No crying until the end'!

Recommended play method: 2 --> 3 --> 1 order.

What was influential: The humor through the entire games, story, worldview.

People who like the following will enjoy it: Humor, weirdness, heart-wrenching things, music, a dog possessed by the spirit of the game developer." 

Touhou Project:

"If I hadn't run into Touhou Project games, my games wouldn't include a 'bullet hell' system. Sometimes fans have told me that Undertale's music all seems Touhou-like... But then, ZUN told me that he thought Undyne was cool!

Recommended play method: First play the latest game on Steam! (That or start with the 7th or 8th game, then play in whatever order you like.)

What was influential: Bullets, music.

People who like the following will enjoy it: Bullet hell/danmaku, Japanese-ness, girls, hats, the sound of the trumpets used in Undyne's music." 

Cave Story:

"A platformer with shooting game elements. It's a little Metroid-like, but with cuter character designs and top-tier music. But beyond that, its biggest charm is how, because it was all made by one person, the creator's individuality comes through strongly in everything. Playing it leaves that impression on you. The idea of giving my own game multiple endings came from Cave Story. And then... ahem... the character design just might... have influenced me...

Recommended play method: The free version is available online! ( https://studiopixel.jp/binaries/dou_1006.zip )

What was influential: The power of a sole developer, multiple endings, music, setting.

People who like the following will enjoy it: Jumping and shooting enemies and running around, fluffy white characters with long ears." 

moon:

"There's an RPG 'hero' going around committing terrible acts, and the main character gathers love and follows the hero to take care of things. It's a lovable, strange adventure game. You could say that this conceptual reversal resonates through all my games.

Recommended play method: It's out on Nintendo Switch! Download it!

What was influential: LOVE, world view.

People who like the following will enjoy it: Adventure games, noble RPGs, quirky clay animation, humming onions."

Yume Nikki:

"A mysterious game where the main character is a girl wandering through dreams. Made in RPG Maker 2003. It has an overwhelming atmosphere through it. It's free, so give it a play.

Recommended play method: Free download for PC.

What was influential: Mysterious atmosphere, randomly-occurring events.

People who like the following will enjoy it: Item finding elements, foreboding and nostalgic feelings, Secom's security systems."

Brandish series:

"Nihon Falcom's famous works! The story of the main character falling into an underground world and trying to return to the surface.... The other people trapped underground and losing hope.... And the first area is called the 'Ruins'! (lol)  When I was a kid, I recorded a tape of the game's music and played it back over and over. By the way, the shop system in Undertale is influenced by this game. And the appearance of the eyes of the king closely resemble the king's eyes in the intro to Brandish... I recommend it to people at every opportunity, but everyone loses their sense of direction and gives up... aaaaahhh! (* White rice erupts from Toby's mouth all over the computer screen!)

Recommended play method: Try playing EGG's Brandish Renewal ( https://www.amusement-center.com/project/egg/cgi/ecatalog-detail.cgi?contcode=7&product_id=1376 ).

What was influential: Shopkeeper, 'Ruins' area, story, music.

People who like the following will enjoy it: Puzzles and action, dungeons, serious atmospheres, spinning in circles in a schoolyard until you feel sick."

There are still lots more! There are so many games that had an influence, it's impossible to name every one. I hope people will take motivation from the games I make, too. I'm cheering for all of you!

Gitaroo Man: "This game's music is loaded with heartstring-pulling power. My eternal goal is making music like this."

Illusion of Gaia: "The story sure leaves an impression! And somehow there's a snail pie in the English version. But I never want to go to the continent of Mu again." 

OFF: "A free RPG developed by a Belgian team. There's also a Japanese version! I was motivated by seeing another creator's indie RPG! (* Toby is humming jazz-style music.)"

Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty: "I don't think I would have made a meta game if I hadn't encountered [Hideo] Kojima's fourth wall-breaking style. I need scissors!"

Lunar 2: Eternal Blue: "Playing this was my first experience with liking game characters... I was 10. The English version had dirty jokes and pop culture references... I wonder what the Japanese version was like."

[welcometogrouchland]

i am so brainrotted about deltarune all of the time. do you have any kris or soul theories i would love to hear them — anothergoddamnmystery

OOHHH that's a good question. I also have perma-brainrot for this video game even tho I'm. Very much not a theorizer??? I like watching shows with a lot mystery and then. Letting other people solve the mysteries <3

I think what's more my wheelhouse is the. Weird debate regarding the morality of. Playing deltarune??? As in, if the theory that Kris and the soul are separate entities, with us controlling the soul that posseses Kris, turns out to be true then...does that make us the bad guys? Is Toby Fox punishing us for playing the game?? Why would he do that???

I get why some ppl would think this way and I've had like. Similar thoughts before about similar media with meta narratives, but i don't think that's the case and is a reductive way to look at it? Because deltarune and Undertale are games about choices- what you can and can't control and what you do with the options given to you- and they use their medium as a video game to bring that message directly to the player, the person making all the choices. You're not a bad person for controlling Kris who probably doesn't like being controlled 90% of the time (because at the end of the day Kris isn't a real person suffering real harm), you're just not playing an average RPG (I'm. Very sick of ppl trying to argue that anyone who likes the player is the soul theory doesn't understand what video games are. Feels kind of insulting to me) and that's A Good Thing Actually.

That was a bit. Ranty (I'm not actually upset about people who don't believe the soul/player theory, I just think the people I've seen arguing against it are making very poor arguments motivated by them feeling punished for it hdbdjf) so uh. In terms of any actual theory content related to Kris and the soul?

I think that the relationship is more complicated than just us possessing Kris. My bet is that they somehow invited us to control them (possibly during the vessel creation?) For Some Reason. They've shown an interest in like. demonic possession and stuff (I think it's seen in their search results in queens mansion/some of cattie's dialogue?? It's been a while so I could be wrong) one person theorized they did it after having to chose between asgore and toriel in the divorce, another theorized it has something to do with the bunker, which might have something to do with dess holiday, and... there's a lot of possibilities essentially. But a lot a possession narratives play with the idea of a posses-ee agreeing w/ the posses-or because they gain something from it, even though they're often manipulated, have their hand forced, given limited information/don't know what they're getting into, etc.

Idk how much of this is a theory on what the relationship between Kris and the red soul is and how much is like. Me toying with an interesting potential route the game could go down, but uh. Either way. @ Kris honey you've got a big storm coming

[stardomthenightwing]

Happy Thanksgiving!

I am thankful for my family of course like everyone always says, but that's just what you start off with when you are born into this world. I have grown stronger and smarter and have found many other things in this world to be thankful for. Here's a list, and I recommend you read through it:

1. I'm thankful for the person reading this. Even though I'm a total stranger on the internet, you take time out of your day to hear me talk about crap I like.

2. I'm grateful to my followers for supporting me. I didn't have you all last Thanksgiving because you are all something new to me which makes it that much more special. I wouldn't be here without you all, so thanks for giving me a chance. Remember that by following someone, you entrust power to that person; choose wisely the next time you allow someone the power to control others.

3. I'm thankful for Wings of Fire even though it may be very badly written at times. There are things we wish we could see and things we wish never happened in the series, but that doesn't change the fact that someone worked really hard to bring us the series. The graphic novels, no matter how bad they may be to you, were still worked on and took much time to make; the same goes for the tv show in development and the books. I love Wings of Fire, and I appreciate that I was lucky enough to find a goodish dragon book series with no dragon riders and stupid medieval stuff. I'm thankful for you, Tui T. Sutherland!

4. Even though The Owl House was canceled, I'm still thankful for the great memories I made watching it and the joy it brought me. There's still a season 3 planned, so I'm grateful that we even get more Owl House content. I love the themes in that show and the lessons you learn from it. Dana Terrace is an amazing person, and I hope you get a chance to watch The Owl House if you haven't already. It got lesbians, so watch it, please!

5. I'm thankful that Deltarune Chapter 2 came out so unexpectedly this year. I thought I would have to wait 999 years to see more of Toby Fox's intelligent wonders, but I guess I don't. Deltarune is an amazing game, and I love its humor and realistic concepts so much! It is such a smartly made game, and I can't imagine how much work Toby and his crew put into it. I cannot wait for more Deltarune content!

6. I'm thankful for the amazing games Earthbound and Mother 3. Even though you may have never heard of them, they are the best games I have ever played in my life, and they shaped me into the person I am today. Shigesato Itoi is amazing, and I know exactly why he chooses to keep his games so secret. I am so lucky to even be smart enough to emulate these two games, and I am so grateful that games like these can even exist! If you ever get a chance in your life to play either of these games, I ask you with all of my heart that you try to complete them. We don't deserve to have these games in our world because they aren't just ahead of their time, they are a whole generation ahead of our species. Thank you to the Mother team!

7. There are many other things I could say, but I feel like the most important thing these pieces of content have taught me, I find it every single one, is those daunting situations you have. No matter who you are in this world, there is always going to be a much harder life out there that you are fortunate enough not to have. I am thankful to live in America and not financially suffer like Spamton, I am thankful to have a loving family and not have lost them like Lucas, I am thankful to not have a galactic space authority that's out to kill me like Steven and the diamonds in his funky universe, I am thankful to not be aware of the truth of the spacetime continuum like Sans' poor, tortured soul, I am thankful to not be misjudged for my innocent past like Darkstalker in Wings of Fire; I am thankful to have such an easy life compared to others, and I hope you can find a reason to be content with your living conditions too someday if not already.

One more heads-up, even if you don't celebrate Thanksgiving, I'm going to go around and ask the people I follow what they are thankful for because it's always good to recognize the things we might not have in other timelines.

[anfie-in-the-box]

Fragments of Shattered Dreams Hurt So Much (But You’re the Only One I Need to Heal)

Fragment Eight, Where Never Being The Same Again Is Exactly What It Means to Be Alive

Dream has failed. It just keeps happening, again, and again, and again, and again, and nothing seems to be able to break the vicious circle. Makes one wonder whether things would’ve been better if Dream hadn’t been a sentient being from the very beginning. Only that would mean that neither should his brother have been created the way he was… Dream cannot stand such thoughts. Unacceptable. Inexcusable.

That therefore leaves Dream being… well, himself. Neither a human nor a monster (even though he looks like one), but a person nevertheless. So Dream has been a person since the very beginning, and especially ever since he’d got a soul. So Dream has his own feelings, desires, and fears. So he’s got every right to be in pain. So it’s okay for him to wish to never ever be alone again, and also to be saved. So he can make mistakes. So he’s able to… make amends?.. Is it really possible for all the damage to be undone?

Cross was the first to see the real Dream. Cross had been looking past his aura and right at him way before Dream could even think of such a concept. It would be foolish not to admit that Cross has seen Dream at his weakest. At his worst, too. Yet here Cross is, yelling desperately, “I don’t wanna hurt you!!”, even when the stakes are high as ever once again; saying “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t…”, even though he’s on the verge of fainting from injuries and pain that Dream has caused. Surely Cross will understand, when he wakes up, that Dream’s “If only you could!” has never meant his strength and supremacy — quite the opposite, that Dream realizes only now. These words of his have only proved more how fragile and broken Dream is and how badly he needs help. In the end, Dream’s been crying for someone to save him even in his rage, even when this blind, uncontrollable force has got the best of him. Surely Cross will see it, too. After all, he’s so good at seeing Dream, getting better and better at it somehow… Filled with determination, too. In a way, not exactly a monster, not with a soul like his. It makes the two of them, outsiders, weirdos… unique creatures.

Just Cross, who decided to devote his life to Dream whatever happens.

Just Dream, who never could have thought that there is such a thing as ‘just himself’; who is scared, hurt, and dying; who simply wants all this suffering to end somehow, anyhow.

There is just Dream, who from now on recognizes his own desires, intentions… dreams. And that Dream wants his brother to be safe. That Dream also wants Cross to stay in what little is left of his life.

That Dream decisively puts a ring on his finger, accepting not only Cross’ feelings, but his very own, too.

。。。

Credits:

Undertale © Toby Fox

Dreamtale © jokublog

Cross © jakei95 / xtaleunderverse

Shattered!Dream © shattereddreamsau

Dark Cream © zu-is-here

Read it on ao3

Read Russian version on ficbook or fanficus

。。。

Notes

Stars, what an experience. I had no idea how to do this, how to convey Dream’s mental path from "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." to that gentle smile when Cross wakes up and wearing his ring at last. Then it crushed on me (insert joke about Coraline crossover fic), I just had to be fast enough to write everything down. Hope I did well enough. ... @zu-is-here, what do you think? If anybody else has something to say, it's always welcome and appreciated, too!

But let's get to the point. R e f e r e n c e s ✨

(also just notes, I'm surprisingly talkative today)

Casual reminder that comic's eighth chapter is called "Never be the same again". I wanted to say that it's alright, and I'm really glad I have a chance to do so. That's how life is. One of my favourite writer's books ends with wonderful and very accurate words (my translation, since the book is in Russian): "All of us always leave forever. It is impossible to return, for it is always someone else who returns instead of us; the problem is that nobody gets it." Just. Yes. Life is change. It is okay to never be the same again.

"whether things would have been better if Dream hadn't been a sentient being..." That's pretty much how villagers saw him, from my point of view. Not a person, just a function.

Fortunately, Dream loves his brother. And he's not alone.

And I love Dream realizing that he is a person. His own person with his own feelings and all that. I've been looking forward to writing this part.

Everything Dream and Cross say is quoted from "Never be the same again".

Fun fact: the more I look at the panels where Dreams laughs and shouts "If only you could!", the more I see fear and helplessness and despair instead of arrogance and wrath. I don't know if I'm right, that's just how personally I see it.

Also I've been waiting to write that parallel about Cross not exactly being a monster, just like Dream. I've been thinking about it for quite some time now, and finally! It's perfect, honestly. Nightmare and Dream are absolutely unique creatures, but so are Killer and Cross, who were monsters, right, but are they now, really? With these souls? With amounts of determination no monster could ever stand? I don't think so, though it's fine to have a different opinion.

I'm kind of sort of referring to some asks about the eighth chapter?.. Especially those regarding reasons why Dream doesn’t want to worry about his feelings, and why he rejected Cross' proposal. Also about "Save me one more time until I..." The way I see it, loosing control means dying. Dream is painfully aware of how little time he's got left. Lucky us, we know better!

I believe that's all?.. Never can be entirely sure.

As usual, thank you for reading, take care, and stay tuned for more!

。。。

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[lipstickchainsaw]

Choices, Choices, Choices

Yesterday, in my post about Kris, I mentioned I had ideas about the theme of choice that I wanted to write about, and I’m feeling particularly inspired, so here we are. (Spoilers for Deltarune chapter 2.)

But before we can talk about choices, we need to talk about stories.

Stories like to be about stories. They comment on the stories we tell each other in general, or how the audience engages with stories, or how stories are made…

In the Otherverse, this is built into its magic system, which involves establishing narrative patterns to let you do cool shit (hi, if you’re new here, please read Pale), and there are some interesting theories about how the powers in Worm match with literary techniques (I promise I’m not just trying to get you to read Wildbow).

In Deltarune, the main way this expresses itself is in how people engage with stories. Each dark world is its own little story, with its own setting, characters, plot and themes. They take mundane objects in the real world (the light world, in this case), and bring them to life to build a narrative around them. Thus far, these narratives have been very straight-forward and simple, because it’s not these stories that actually matter for the wider plot of Deltarune itself.

The thing that actually matters is what happens in the real world.

The dark worlds are fun, but engaging with them is merely escapism, which isn’t a problem in its own right, but if you do that too much (if you create too many dark fountains), you end up losing sight of the real world (in a world covered in darkness), with all the individual stories crushed under the weight of our need for escapism (all the darkners turned to stone), while we lead hollow existences ourselves. This is the Roaring, and Ralsei does not want it to happen.

The things that actually matter don’t happen in those stories. They happen in the light world, where conflicts are mundane, and can’t be resolved by fighting or sparing monsters, and deep-seated issues can’t just be solved with a single conversation where you pick the right dialogue options. A world where a rough divorce leaves everyone hurt in ways that are impossible to quantify in stats, and financial troubles can’t be solved with just doing a few quests.

But does that mean the dark worlds are just fun distractions?

 The Purpose of Stories

The stories we immerse ourselves in undoubtedly have an effect on us, and if we engage with them on their own merit, they can inspire us to change our attitudes or our perspectives in ways that carry on beyond that story.

Susie’s experience in the first dark world has her lighten up, and connect with Kris as a friend in ways that clearly carry over to the light world. She has a friend to share these experiences with, but she doesn’t just hang out with Kris to go have fun adventures. They back each other up in other areas also, because the friendship forged in this shared experience is still real, even if that experience is just escapism, and it clearly makes Susie a happier person.

Noelle’s normal experience in the cyber world seems to have her build up some confidence, and have her reckon with some of the trauma she’s been struggling with, and she stands up to Queen by the end of that journey in a way that I think will influence how she interacts with her own mom going forward. Despite how scary it often was for her, she seems to have come out of it a happier person, also, and maybe next time, she’ll be able to ask Susie out!

This is how stories influence people, and can help people become stronger in the real world. Not because the experiences directly translate, but for reasons much more difficult to quantify, but are difficult to ignore.

If we engage with the story on its own merit, we can be nice, or we can be mean about it, but it won’t materially change much (you either get a town full of recruits, or you get to see your numbers go up). Absorbing those impressions won’t even be much of a choice. (The beads of the toy keep marching on.)

But what if we don’t?

 Snowgrave

What if we say ‘fuck you’ to the story being told? What if we don’t want to go through those motions? What if we decide to break the story instead? What if we take that power we have in the story, and make the choice to use it?

(Credit to @agentravensong​ for the picture)

Well.

Then we’re in real trouble, aren’t we?

The Snowgrave route is what happens if we decide to replace the story as meant to be told with our own edgy version, if we decide to turn the most wholesome, innocent character evil for a short story.

And it ends with one person dead, and it ends with Noelle aware of the player’s influence.

And we all have the power to make that choice, at any time, as long as we’re prepared to suffer the consequences. As long as we’re prepared to be the bad guy.

Does this mean that the only choice we, as players, have, is to play along or to be an asshole? And what does that mean within the wider metaphor of this being our engagement with stories?

I don’t think Toby Fox resents the people who play with his world and fuck around with it, but I definitely think there’s something behind this. We’ll see what things look like in chapter 3.

 Kris…?

Anyway, that’s whether our choices matter, and we’re not the only ones this theme applies to.

Susie tells Kris that their choices don’t really matter, and Ralsei assures them that they do. Now, Ralsei has his own ulterior motives, and Susie was trying to hurt Kris’ feelings (and doesn’t seem to have some philosophical objection to the ability to make choices), so we can say both of them are pretty biased, but the theme is still there.

Kris themselves clearly feels trapped, caught up in strings, given their reaction to the Spamton fight, and, hell, everything involving Spamton in general, but Kris exercises quite some autonomy. Aside from showing that they care a lot about Susie, they get to choose how to interpret our commands, and conveys a lot of their intentions that way.

Do those small choices matter? Does them saving Susie from the King make a difference? Susie’s support in the light world seems to show that it does, at least.

Speaking of…

 Susie

Susie is the character we have the least control over. At first, she refuses to follow Kris to start with, and refuses to Act entirely. She’s in control of every decision she makes, and even after relenting some, we, as players, have the least influence over her at all. Every command we give her gets turned into something completely different, and even when she’s fighting Lancer, we only control her defending, not attacking.

She interrupts a lot of the choices we ostensibly get to make, and she enforces her own ability to Act, even granting it to Ralsei (and taking away Kris ‘unique talent’), which ironically gives us more control over her.

But that’s the interesting thing about Susie, isn’t it? Her character development indicates that making all of your own choices, and constantly doing things your own way… isn’t for the best. It doesn’t help solve your problems. Sometimes, it’s best to follow someone else’s choices, as long as they don’t try to make you do something really stupid.

Perhaps, then, this is why Kris always puts the SOUL back in?

Now there’s a thought.

[argentdandelion]

Are Darkners Mind-Controlling Lightners? (Part 3 of 4)

(Caveat: Darkners viewing Lightners as royalty-celebrity-philanthropists, rather than subtly mind-controlling godlike beings, is the most plausible interpretation of their relationship. As this was largely complete before figuring that out, it will be posted nonetheless.)(As Tumblr hates links, use the tag "Are Lightners Mind-Controlling Darkners?" for navigation.)

Darkners Are Toys?

As ZaCloud points out, the Dark World is apparently based on the abandoned classroom, and all the toys and games within. Darkners, thus, are (or are based on) toys and games. This would explain why they so enjoy helping Lightners: that’s what toys and games exist for.

However, being psychologically constructed as a toy may limit their ability to choose their own lives and happiness. Consider Seam, who says: “neither Light nor Dark hold a future for a Darkner in my condition.” Seam is an old, damaged stuffed animal; dialogue suggests toys so damaged as Seam have little potential to be played with. Should Darkners set so much of their purpose on helping Lightners (e.g., by playing with them) Seam may feel devoid of any chances to fulfill a purpose, causing a descent into depression. Although being very damaged can certainly affect a person's (or, presumably, Lightner's) quality of life, such people can still be loved, fill a particular purpose, and feel fulfilled, and so have more control over their happiness than Darkners.

Furthermore, what if the Darkners want to do things that would make them less appealing to Lightners? If, say, Ralsei wants to fix some kind of Dark Fountain problem and work on it full-time, would he deny himself future happiness indefinitely by falling out of the Lightners' lives?

Effects of Darkners Being Toys

Although knowing Lightners are toys could make things go well, by giving an innocent, reasonable context to their admiring, friendly, servile ways, there are also ways it could go wrong. Recalling that the physical forms of Darkners are mere objects may encourage viewing Darkners as only objects which exist for Lightners’ use. Consider Sid from Toy Story: by real-life standards, Sid is nothing but a little unnerving, but in a world where toys can suffer, he’s a horrific mad scientist.

Viewing Darkners as objects could have problems even if not malicious: what if Kris or Susie were to fix Seam-the-toy without Seam-the-person’s consent? Would basically doing a non-essential facial reconstruction surgery to make Seam happier or more “lovable” really have Seam’s best interests at heart? Just because Darkners are happy to help Lightners doesn’t mean Darkners would feel the same about the reverse.

Although Susie doesn’t outright talk about the implications of Darkners being toys, she does seem unnerved by the idea Darkners’ “purpose” is to help Lightners.

Susie: Hey, uh, let's ditch the weird "purpose" talk. You're probably just glad you ate a weird berry. Lancer: Yeah!! I'm still boost from the juice!!!

Arguably, Lancer is unnerved too: his over-enthusiastic delivery may very well be a façade to cover his discomfort.

Exploitation & Counterproductive Responses

Although the most likely interpretations of the fulfillment effect don’t entirely preclude free will, one could argue Lightners are supernaturally charismatic to Darkners. Indeed, it’s possible the relationship is so unequal as to make Darkners genuinely admire Lightners for unimpressive or counterproductive things:

Lancer: “Earlier, Susie ate a pinecone off the floor. It gave her a terrible stomach-ache. It was VERY brave and cool.”

Not even Lancer’s unique psychological situation of admiring villainy lets this make sense.

Lightners might also be extra-persuasive. When Susie is in the prison, she “invites” a Rudinn guard into the trash can. It turns out the Rudinn was literally invited there, not beaten up and shoved in:

Thanks for inviting me! This trash can's really great!

I apologize for the inconvenience earlier!

I'm gonna invite my friends into this trash can, too!

While it’s probably meant as a funny moment whose phrasing parallels Lancer’s earlier threat/invitation in the Field of Hopes and Dreams, it’s probably not just that. (Toby Fox made Deltarune, and he thinks of everything.)

Inescapable Relationship

But what if Lightners don't like this relationship?

They may not have a choice, if they cannot turn the fulfillment effect off. Indeed, they may not even be able to ask for help without Darkners considering the Lightner-Darkner relationship.

Some characters seem to know Kris and Susie are Lightners without being told by other characters who know, or figuring it out by process of elimination. Namely, Top Chef, a Rudinn fanning Susie, and Jevil. The last is especially interesting, since Jevil would logically be isolated from everyone, and so couldn’t be told a physical description of Kris and Susie. The fact Lancer attacks Susie and Kris even before Ralsei speaks of the prophecy and identifies them as Lightners suggests he, too, can identify them as Lightners. As the characters have nothing in common, it's possible Darkners can detect which people are Lightners.

On the other hand, Top Chef, some Jigsawries, and some Rudinns identify Susie only as a “beast”. It’s possible they have such high expectations of how Lightners act that they have trouble identifying Lightners as such when they are aggressive.

Conclusion

In conclusion, it seems Darkners are, overall, strongly inclined to a subservient relationship of dubious consent to Lightners, and Lightners cannot escape this unequal, worshipful relationship.

If you enjoyed what you read, consider using the donation hole on the ArgentDandelion Ko-Fi or Patreon.

Made with the help of Ihasafandom and Batter-Sempai.

[kimtanathegeek]

Two Brothers, Many Paths - Ch 4

Have I mentioned how much I love these skelebros?

Undertale copyright Toby Fox

Story and original characters by me, Kimtana

Please do not use without both permission and credit.

Read below, or read it on AO3 here.

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The sense of movement nearby slowly roused Sans. Having no desire to waken, he merely shifted his body slightly, making sure not to disturb Papyrus. That’s when he realized his arms were empty and no longer holding his little brother. He snapped his eyes open and lifted his head up immediately.

Papyrus was sitting a short distance away, playing with the tiny bones he had created the night before. He noticed that Sans had woken up and grinned at him.

Relief washed over Sans like a cool breeze, and he breathed the anxiety out of his lungs with a deep sigh. “Morning, Pap.”

Papyrus answered with babble-speak and continued playing with the bones.

The morning sunlight poured into the cave, brightening the stony interior with its soft yellow light, the light blue bones looking dim in comparison. The sounds of birds chirping and warbling trilled outside, signaling the start of a new day.

Sans sat up, stretching his arms, neck, and back, his joints popping loudly. The pain in his body was much better and his weakness had subsided somewhat. It was certainly much easier for him to sit up than it had been the night before. The dull ache in his bones from the last fall he had suffered the night before reminded him to check his health to make sure the bit of food he had eaten had helped. When he checked he was stunned.

10 HP/1 HP.

“Wh-what?” he gasped. “How is my HP higher than my max? Why would that—”

He stopped, suddenly remembering something his father used to always say. When he and Papyrus would defy their bedtime, their father used to plead with them by saying that sleep was good for them.

Don’t stay up longer, sleep makes you stronger.

His father’s adage echoed in Sans’ mind. Sans checked his health again, just to be sure. He was still 9 HP higher than his new maximum.

“Was Daddy right the whole time?” Sans wondered. He’d never noticed, but then again, he typically didn’t check his HP first thing in the morning. Being the young skeleton that he was, he would go an entire day of scrapes and bruises before checking his HP, which he rarely did anyways since it had always been so high.

It wasn’t 250 HP, but 10 was certainly better than 1, so he was relieved with the added health. Especially since he was facing a bottomless pit descension in the near future. He wondered if he would gain even more the following day if he didn’t injure himself. He toyed with the idea of sleeping until his HP was back at 250, but he realized that would take weeks.

“Pap, want some breakfast?” He pulled the haversack in front of him.

At the mention of food, Papyrus jumped up from the tiny bones, waddled over, and plunked himself down in front of his brother eagerly.

“Heh,” Sans grinned as he opened the bag. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

He pulled out a wedge of cheese and some bread. He broke off a portion of the cheese and handed it to his brother. The little skeleton held the cheese in both hands and chomped down hungrily on it. Sans smiled at Papyrus’ cuteness as he tore a piece of the bread off and put it in his brother’s lap.

They ate their food silently, Papyrus focused purely on eating and Sans deep in thought.

They had to find their father. The only problem was, Sans had no idea where to begin to look. He remembered hearing his mother say that he was serving the King. Did that mean he was with the monsters being swarmed by the hordes of humans they saw when they first crested the hill? What if he, too, had been killed in the battle? Sans shook his head quickly to wipe the painful thought from his mind. He couldn’t bear to lose his father as well. No, he had to believe he was still alive, they just needed to find him.

Sans recalled his mother telling her friend that the King wanted the monsters to go to the mountain to hide, and that the cavern they were hiding in somehow led to the rest of the mountain, most probably down the giant hole. The other monsters might already be inside the mountain on the other side. Sans sighed, remembering how large Mt. Ebott was, figuring it would take ages to reach it. He wasn’t even sure which way to go if he found more than one tunnel or path.

Sans stopped himself. He was getting too discouraged, he needed to focus on a plan. If the monsters were on the other side, and the cavern he and his brother were in eventually led to the other side, like his mother said, there might be a chance that the monsters might also travel further into the mountain through their side. And if their father hadn’t seen his family in the group he was in, maybe he would search through the mountain for them, and he and Papyrus would eventually meet into him and be reunited.

Sans nodded to himself resolutely. Yes, surely their father would look for them, and he would be in the mountain like they were. It would be a while, but they would be back together soon, and they would leave the mountain from the other side and return back home. He was sure of it.

As he popped the last morsel of bread and cheese in his mouth, he wondered how much longer the food he had packed would last them. While he had crammed the haversack full with as much food as he could fit, it wouldn’t last forever. When he had finished eating, he spread out his jacket and, tipping the haversack over, poured the food onto it. He tossed the bag aside and examined their food stock.

There were several large wedges of cheese, a few small bread loaves, scores of nuts in small cloth pouches, several handfuls of dried fruit and berries, over a dozen apples, several pears, a dozen and a half button mushrooms, and a few large carrots. The mushrooms and bread would be the first to spoil, he reasoned, followed by the cheese. The nuts would last the longest, but they wouldn’t fill them up as much.

Sans ran his hand over his skull as he planned their future meals and started to get worried. While the food spread out on his jacket seemed like a lot, they would have to eat sparingly since Sans had no idea how long they were going to be there or how they would get any more. What kind of food could possibly be found inside a mountain?

“We need to leave here soon,” Sans uttered under his breath.

That led to the next problem—he needed a way to take Papyrus down with him safely. There was no way he could wrap Papyrus in the strip of cloth like his mother had to make a sling, and if he didn’t do it right, Papyrus would fall into.... He shook his head, shuddering at the thought.

As he was racking his brain, his eyes fell on the empty haversack and the still-munching Papyrus inches away from it. He wagered that the haversack might be large enough for Papyrus to fit in, and being strapped to Sans’ back would be the safest way to transport his brother. The only way to know would be to try.

While his brother finished, Sans put as much food as he could in the empty side pockets. If Papyrus was going to be in the main pocket, he couldn’t have his brother accidentally destroying the only food they had. He did not, however, put any food in the small left-side pocket in which the strip of cloth from their mother’s red cape had been placed. He wanted that to be in a pocket all its own.

Much of the food remained on his jacket, so he carefully wrapped it up it tight, then used some of the vines to tie it into a bundle. He used more vines to tie it to the front of the haversack and tugged it, making sure it was secure.

By now Papyrus was picking the last bit of crumbs off his clothes and eating them.

“Hey, Pap,” his brother called. “I need to see if I can carry you in my bag. Come here for a sec.”

Papyrus raised an eyebrow, imagining himself stuffed in the bag like the food had been. He was not keen on his brother’s idea, and shook his head. “Nyeh.”

“Pap, come on,” Sans urged pleadingly. Then he flashed a winning grin. “It will be like riding on my back. It will be fun!”

Wary of being stuffed in a bag yet enticed by the idea of going for a ride, Papyrus slowly approached his brother, a dubious expression painted on his tiny face. Sans flattened the bag as best he could against the floor and opened the mouth wide. Papyrus put his little hands on Sans’ shoulders as he stepped in the bag one foot at a time, then sat on the bottom of the bag. Sans pulled up the sides, tugging here and there, and pulled the straps until Papyrus was just a head poking out of the haversack.

Sans threw his arms in the air in exaggerated excitement. “That looks so cool! You’re going to have a great ride in there!”

Papyrus’ face split into a grin and he giggled. The bag fit him snugly enough that Sans was satisfied this would be the safest way—as long as Papyrus didn’t squirm and make Sans lose his balance.

Sans loosened the straps and freed his brother. “Ok, we’ll do that. I just need to figure out a few things, and we’ll take that ride, ok?”

Papyrus nodded.

“You play with your bones while I do that.”

The little skeleton happily obliged and returned over to his tiny white bones.

Sans sighed deeply, dreading his next experiment. He had been afraid to try to stand as the last few times were not successful and ended with a lot of pain. But they weren’t going anywhere if he was stuck sitting forever, so he pushed himself off the ground and slowly rose to his feet. He buckled at first, his legs shaking horribly, but at least he was not falling over. He leaned against the stone formation to steady himself, caught his breath, then took a few careful steps forward, prepared to fall. He wobbled a bit but was able to get to the side wall of the cave. He sighed gratefully—a good night’s rest had made all the difference.

He stretched his lower back and legs out, his joints popping and cracking, then he slowly walked over to the hole. He held onto the white bones that he had used to fence the rim and looked down into the depths. Nothing but a black void awaited them. He groaned softly but knew there was no other way to go. How to get down, however, was the question. They had no ropes, no ladders, and the walls of the hole were far too sheer to climb down. He leaned his forehead against the bones as he struggled to see how in the world they could get down the hole. His eyes focused on to the white bones in front of his eyes, and an idea formed in his mind.

 -

 Before leaving, Sans slowly searched the cave for some sharp rocks to use for cutting and a couple flat stones to crack the nuts with. He wanted to be as prepared as possible, having barely anything other than food with them. After finding a few suitable stone “tools,” he put them in the haversack pocket with the vines and leaves. Satisfied, he realized they were all set to move on.

But not yet.

There was one last thing Sans wanted to do before leaving the area they’d been staying in. He slowly walked towards the cave entrance, still blocked by the iridescent glass-like sheet wall. Sans put his hands up on the opening, steadying himself, and pressed his face against the barrier.

The valley was bright with morning daylight. A breeze fluttered multicolored leaves over the grass and down the hillside. Squirrels, rabbits, and birds went about their daily routines, hopping and flitting to and fro.

One would never have known that incredible tragedy had ravaged the same valley a day earlier.

Sans stared at the place he had seen his mother fall. He knew exactly where she had been, as the moment was forever etched in his memory. Tears fell from the young skeleton’s eyes as the scene played out in his mind painfully.

Papyrus, hearing his brother’s quiet sniffling, ambled over slowly and silently, until he reached his brother’s side. He patted the barrier with his tiny hands, as if trying to open it and leave the way they had come. He pressed his little skull against it, turning his head left and right, desperately seeking something.

He whimpered softly. “Mama...?”

Hearing his brother call for their mother was too much for Sans. He collapsed on his knees, sobbing uncontrollably.

Papyrus looked from Sans to the valley, then hugged his weeping brother, his own tears welling up in his eyes.

Sans embraced his baby brother tightly. “M-Mommy’s gone, Pap...,” he choked out. “Mommy’s gone....”

Although the little skeleton was too young to fully understand, he knew enough to grasp what his brother meant. He buried his face in his brother’s shoulder and cried loudly, his tears mixing with those of his brother’s. The two brothers wept in each other’s arms as they mourned the loss of their brave, loving mother.

 -

 The final preparations had been made and the plan had been devised. Despite the hesitation to go into the gaping hole, Sans knew they had to leave the cave and find their father.

Papyrus was sitting back into the haversack with his head poking out, ready for his ride, his tiny white bones packed comfortably in with him. Sans checked, rechecked, and triple-checked the straps of the bag, making sure Papyrus could not free himself and escape while they were descending. Sans carefully and awkwardly shouldered the bag while sitting on the floor, then struggled to stand, grunting with exertion. He steadied himself on the stone formation and slowly stood up straight. He looked over his shoulder, just barely seeing the head of his brother behind his own as Papyrus peeked over his shoulder.

“You ok back there?”

He heard the sound of the tiny bones rattling in the bag as Papyrus shifted.

“Nyeh...,” he answered softly. Sans could sense a little fear and sadness lingering in his voice.

“It’s ok, Pap,” Sans said soothingly. “You’ll be safe in there, and we’ll be out of here soon. I’m not going to let anything bad happen to you.”

Tiny bones rustled as Sans felt Papyrus’ head rest on the back of his.

Sans tested the weight of the haversack, made sure he could balance enough, and felt ready for the descent. “Here we go, Pap.”

Sans walked over to the hole and raised his left hand. The white bone fence disappeared back into the floor. Sans gulped nervously as the gaping hole now loomed before them dangerously. He closed his eyes and sighed, concentrating on his idea and swallowing down the fear of falling into the void.

His eyes snapped open wide then narrowed, and he raised his left hand once again. Long, thick white bones shot out from the sides of the hole, creating a spiraling ramp-like pathway around the walls leading downward.

Sans sat on the edge of the hole and carefully scooted onto the bones. Then he clasped his hands together and created a glowing blue bone to give them light. He slid it in between two of the white bones so that it hung down, the knobby epiphysis keeping it from falling through like a nailhead. He looked down, half expecting the light to reveal the bottom of the hole. It did not.

After taking a deep breath, he carefully gripped the white bone he was sitting on and slid his rear forward to land onto the next bone. He then gripped that bone and repeated the slow process.

It reminded him of when he and his brother would slide down the stairs on their bottoms, much to their parents’ chagrin. The difference between then and now was that the bones were nowhere near as steep as actual stairs, and the stairway didn’t have a bottomless pit under the steps.

His body shook as he looked down between the gaps in the bones and saw nothingness. He told himself repeatedly that as long has he stayed seated and scooting, he didn’t have to worry about his legs buckling or his feet slipping on the smooth bones. The bones stretched out long enough that he was in no danger of slipping off the side of the bone spiral “staircase.” None of this helped the butterflies in his stomach or the trembling in his bones.

Bone by bone, Sans descended slowly down the hole, inching his way along in the blue-white light, his brother napping on his back. The only way forward for the two little skeletons was down.