#to this day i dont know how she succeeded

[alxclaremont]

it’s so crazy to me how my best friend tried to get me into formula 1 by attempting to get me to watch dts back in february which i told her i wouldnt because it sounded stupid and i didnt even know what f1 was and then on a random sunday on the fifth of may she forced me to come over and watch miami with her and i got to watch lando norris win his first ever grand prix and i got to watch him win his first constructors this morning. i am so emotional you guys dont even understand

[cruelsister-moved2]

did we even watch the same show

[arolesbianism]

Every second of every day I remind myself that I'm going to need to learn to draw gore and body horror and every second of everyday I simply keep imagining it instead of drawing it because I don't even wanna try finding usable refs for the shit I wanna pull off (it also doesn't help that searching up refs for skinless human anatomy is. Annoying to do if you wanna draw someone who isn't made of muscle and nothing else)

[ty-bayonet-betteridge]

two of the transfems youre friends with have been talking to you about the clinic they got their bottom surgery done at. apparently its dirt cheap, and the surgeon - despite some oddities and, your friends admit, poor hygiene - is incredibly talented. theyre more than happy to give you her phone number when you ask, and while it sounds simultaneously incredibly sketchy and way too good to be true, at this point youre just so broke, desperate, and tired of gatekeepers that you're willing to give it a shot.

you call on a thursday afternoon, and the call is picked up on the fourth ring, when youre just gearing up to hear an answering machine. the voice on the other end sounds like a middle-aged woman with a smoking habit trying to sound like a cheery, bubbly young girl, and mostly succeeding. hiiiii! what can i do for you? she asks. you say er im looking for a surgical clinic is this the right number? she says mhm! thats me. you say okay, i just have a few questions. she says shoot. you say do you take patients who arent referred to you? she says nobody refers patients to me so yes. then she giggles. youve never heard somebody pull off a giggle in real life. you ask okay, so ive been looking for a place to get my metoidoplasty done, can you do that here? she says i dont know what that is give me like five seconds. then the line goes silent. you can hear her typing on a mechanical keyboard and humming to herself as she reads. youre now convinced that this is not in any way a legitimate medical institution.

youre about to hang up when she comes back on the line. OH you need a dick she says. sure i can do that! does tuesday afternoon work for you? i have that morning free too but i HATE getting up in the mornings so id rather not schedule it if i have to. you say tuesday afternoon is fine, how long should i expect the visit to be? she says i dont know like seven hours? you say seven hours? she says yeah give or take a few, every person is different so i dont know what itll be like until ive got your cunt opened up. honestly probably best to take the whole day off just in case it turns out to be a tough operation. you dont respond to that immediately. she says oh shoot should i not use the word cunt, is that too gendered? sorry. you say no its fine. you say i thought i was just going in for a consult? she says i mean yeah if youd rather. i dont mind doing same-day but some people like having more time to think about their options. do you have somewhere to be tuesday night or something? you say no its just... no tuesday afternoon should be fine. she says okay great!

she gives you her address. she says knock three times so i know its you and not my parole officer. parole officer you ask? she says im being good i promise but i still hate talking to him hes boring. you say if you dont mind me asking what were you imprisoned for? she says the ones i plead guilty to at the trial were a hundred and ninety-two counts of first-degree murder with a parahuman ability, two hundred and fifty-six counts of physical and emotional torture with a parahuman ability, five hundred and six counts of intentional infliction of emotional distress with a parahuman ability, four hundred ninety-eight counts of aggravated assault and battery with a parahuman ability, four hundred twenty five counts of domestic terrorism with a parahuman ability and two hundred and twelve counts without, three counts of arson, two hundred forty two counts of burglary with a parahuman ability, three hundred eight four counts of robbery with a parahuman ability, four hundred twenty seven counts of abduction with a parahuman ability, a hundred eighty six counts of human trafficking with a parahuman ability, three hundred ninety counts of destruction of public property with a parahuman ability, eighty counts of possession of a controlled substance, more than three thousand conspiracy and complicity charges in various felonies, eighteen violations of the Geneva Conventions, and the unauthorized practice of medicine. i plead not guilty to the larceny, sexual assault, contempt of court, corporate espionage, and identity theft charges and the prosecutor didnt really try to fight it since i had already earned seventy life sentences from the other stuff so im technically innocent of those.

you dont say anything to that.

after three seconds of silence she says sooooooooo i'll see you tuesday? you say tuesday, yeah. what was your name again? Riley, she says. Riley Grace Davis. you say thanks again and then hang up.

you debate constantly during the intervening days whether you should go on tuesday. youre grateful your friend group is so slutty; it means youve already seen with your own eyes that this surgery is real and not just a lure to murder you. still, you have some reservations, which you think is perfectly understandable.

you call one of your friends whos been there already. she picks up and you say if this is a joke its only sort of funny. she says if whats a joke? you say the clinic. you say you DID give me the actual number to the place where you actually had your bottom surgery done right? she says yeah, dont worry the surgeons so sweet. you say she admitted to doing two hundred murders when she was on the phone. she says i dont know anything about that but i trust her. you say if i end up dead, kidnapped, or mutilated, its your fault. she says dont worry about it.

tuesday comes. you never agreed to an exact time so you show up as early as you can and still have it be "afternoon" in your mind - 12:30. you climb the rusted fire escape to the third floor door and knock three times. the door is answered by a woman six feet tall in casual but very nice clothes with frizzy brown hair and an expression you cant read. you say er, riley? she says nope. another girl pushes past her, exasperated. she's maybe five foot two and her wavy blonde hair is worn down, with a red bow in it. she's wearing torn jeans - naturally torn, not the sort that you buy with holes in them that youve always hated but the kind that were once normal jeans and now have worn through much of the fabric on the knees. her tshirt is faded and has stains that you cant quite place on it, but youre pretty sure it was once Eidolon merchandise.

she says damnit amy let me answer the door next time. the taller woman, amy apparently, shrugs and steps aside to let you in riley claps her hands together once youre inside and the door is shut. introductions! she shouts. amy, this is, er... I never actually got your name? you tell them your name. she says right! hes one of my clients. and this is Amy, my sister. dont worry about her, shes just a little awkward. amy says can you PLEASE not introduce me as your sister. riley says make me. then she grabs amys shirt and pulls her down, standing on her tiptoes at the same time. they kiss in a very un-sisterly way. you clear your throat politely.

riley breaks away and says right, yeah, sorry! i get distracted easy. youre here to get a dick right. you splutter a bit, both at the bluntness of the question and the fact that amy is still standing right there. riley follows your gaze. she says oh dont worry about her! sorry, i wouldve run her off earlier, i thought you wouldnt come by for another few hours. you say sorry. she says dont worry, its her fault. amy says you didnt tell me you had a client. riley says you didnt ASK. you clear your throat politely again. you say er yes, i did come in for metoidoplasty. she bites her lip and furrows her brow. she says metoido... oh right. well i dont really do that here but i can give you a dick. you say uh im not really interested in phalloplasty. she says whats phalloplasty? amy says its the construction of a penis, usually via tissue flap taken from another part of the body, often followed by the insertion of prosthetics to allow the constructed penis to achieve erection. riley says oh, huh. yeah i dont do that either. i can give you a dick though. she takes a second then puts on an exaggerated scowl. who would want that she asks? amy says lots of people prefer it to metoido for aesthetic reasons or because they dont think theyll be large enough for penetrative sex with metoido. riley says but it wouldnt feel like a dick! man, some surgeons are talentless hacks.

you clear your throat again. you say so if youre- riley says youre clearing your throat a lot, are you okay? you say im fine, its just- she says oh duh were being so rude! why are we all standing around here. come sit down in the living room, do you want anything to drink? she leads you into the living room. it has the unmistakable air of a room thats been cleaned recently, with vacuuming marks present in the carpet and the unmistakable scent of air freshener. the sofa that you're gestured to sit on is, by contrast, unbelievably filthy. stains of every sort are visible on it - some of them are obvious, like the patches of blood and vomit or the ring of a coffee mug. others take you a second to place, like the crusty streak along one cushion that you realize all at once is semen, or the sticky yellow parts that you hope to god are honey. some of them, like the muddy green handprint along one arm of the sofa or the deep black smudge along a seat, are completely foreign to you. you can smell it from several feet away.

amy notices your hesitancy. she says i keep telling her to throw that thing out. riley says and i keep telling HER that its a relic from earth bet! its an antique and itll be worth millions soon. it just needs a good deep cleaning. amy says what that sofa needs is a bullet, not a deep clean. you sit down. drink? riley asks. you say er what do you have? she says water, diet coke, vodka, coffee. no more beer though, SOMEBODY drank the last one. amy says you never said they were off limits! riley says they arent, im just teasing. you say waters fine. riley says aaaaaaaaaamyyyyyyy, could you pleeeeeeaaaaaaaase go get our guest a glass of water and me a diet coke? oh and can you grab the pill bottle on the second shelf of the spice cabinet. amy says sure, i'll be right back.

riley sits down next to you. she says sooooooo what do you want for your dick? you say sorry, if youre not doing phallo or metoido then what exactly are you offering? she says no offense but it would take like literally eight years to give you enough background info for you to understand my explanation, and i dont have that kind of time. im not getting any younger. except for when i am. she laughs louder than you thought a human could. you have no idea how to describe the sound of her laughter. she says just tell me about your dream dick and ill give it to you. trust me, im a doctor.

except that youre not, amy says, returning with glasses and pills in hand. she sets the water down in front of you and you immediately take large gulps, feeling very much lost right now. riley says am TOO, accepting the pill bottle and diet coke from amy. she frowns. why is it can diet coke, she asks? she says glass bottle is so much better. she says why did i even BUY can. amy says they are literally the same liquid, what do you mean its better. riley says theyre not the same, stop deluding yourself. amy says which of us is the REAL doctor? riley says both of us! the PRT finally issued me an equivalency. youre talking to doctor riley davis, MED. amy says oh really? congrats she says. riley beams. then she unscrews the lid of the unlabeled, dark brown glass bottle, grabs three pills, and pops them into her mouth.

what is that you ask. ectasy she says. you want some? you say no thanks. she says you sure? you say i probably shouldnt take drugs before an operation, what if it interacts with the anesthetic? riley says dont worry, i made my own anesthetic that has zero drug-drug interactions. amy says except with sudafed. riley says ok YEAH except with sudafed, how was i supposed to know? she glances at you. you dont take sudafed do you she asks. you say no. she says good. it was such a bitch cleaning the pus off the ceiling she says. you say huh? she says dont worry about it, you dont take sudafed. she says are you sure you dont want any ecstasy? i promise its pure. you say i dont want to get addicted. she says i can surgically remove the addiction pathway from your brain if that would help. amy says riley, no means no. riley says fine. do you want any ecstasy babe? she says no thanks. riley frowns. she says you guys are a bunch of squares. she pops a fourth one and starts chugging diet coke.

she slams the can down after drinking what must be half of it, wipes her mouth with her arm and grins. sorry, we keep getting distracted! she says. she says im getting into the start of a manic episode and that always makes me roll right over people in conversation. what do you want for your dick? you say um. i hadnt really thought about it. its not normally a choice beyond the type of surgery, you sort of just end up with whatever the doctors are able to make work? thats lame she says. why are normal doctors all so lame she says. ok, rude amy says. OBVIOUSLY im not talking about you babe riley says. and stop distracting me from my client! amy holds up her hands in mock surrender, an easy smile on her face.

you didnt bring a toy with you did you, riley asks. you say huh. she says sometimes people bring a toy that they want me to model it after and that makes everything a lot easier. you say no you didn't. you say i hadn't really thought about my preferences, can we go dealer's choice on this? amy pipes up. she says you REALLY dont want riley to go dealers choice. riley says shut up and get me another diet coke, i just finished this one. amy says yes princess. you honestly cant read whether it was meant to be mocking or endearing. riley turns back to you. ok, she says, lets start with basics. primate? canid? equine? suine? dolphin? i could give you a hyena pseudopenis but i dont know if that would be offensive. you say human is fine. she says please dont tell me you're gonna just be boring this whole time. you say define boring. she sighs deeply and starts massaging her temples. amy, having stepped into the room in time to hear the last bit of conversation, tousles rileys hair. she says sorry babe, customer's always right.

you work out the appearance of your soon-to-exist cock this way. riley asks questions about length, girth, hair, amount of semen generated, percentage growth when erect, and you try to give what you think are average answers every time. amy watches, bemused, the whole time. halfway through she leaves to get the bottle of vodka. she drinks five shots in fifteen minutes. you say i didnt think the human body had that much capacity for alcohol resistance. she says it doesnt. riley swats playfully at her arm.

eventually, riley grabs a set of crayons and a cocktail napkin. she says ok, i think we got it, scribbling furiously. she shows you a crayon drawing of a dick. this look good she asks? you squint at it. there are no measurements given and the medium does not allow you to make out any fine detail. you say yeah thats fine. amy tries and fails to hide a smile. riley chucks the napkin aside and rubs her hands together. boring parts done! she says. time to get messy she says. amy pours a sixth shot of vodka. she says dont forget the anesthetic first. riley rolls her eyes. she says OBVIOUSLY i didnt forget the anesthetic. she says ill be right back. as soon as she leaves the room, amy knocks back her shot. she turns to you. she says you mind if i stay and watch? she says i dont want to make you uncomfortable, but i like watching her work. shes cute when shes working. you say at this point youre not sure you would mind anything at all. you say at this point you dont think you would be fazed if she came back with a fully-formed dick wriggling around in her hand like a fish and sewed it onto me. she says dont tempt fate.

riley comes back with a black bag the size of her head, which she sets on the coffee table with a thunk. she points at you and says okay, clothes off. or pants off i guess. you can leave the shirt on. or take it off. i dont care. you take it off. she tells you to lie down and starts pulling things out of the bag. amy stands up from the sofa to give you the space to stretch out and sits on the coffee table instead, one leg pulled up to her chest with her chin resting on her knee.

riley pulls out a syringe from the bag, filled with pitch-black fluid. she says okay this will hurt for a second but only for a second. you say huh? she flips you over onto your belly and jabs the needle against your lower back, into your spinal column. it hurts like a bitch for all of two seconds and then you stop feeling anything at all in your lower body. you also cant move your legs, you realize. what just happened you ask, as she flips you onto your back again. she says i just killed all the cells in the nerves in your lower spine. she says its the easiest way to make sure none of the pain signals slip through, and she'll just replace them with living ones when she's done. you don't know how to respond to that.

she pulls more things out of the bag. a cartoonish array of different cutting implements come out. most of them are various sizes of medical scalpel, ring cutter, or saw, but you also see a pair of chunky pink safety scissors, a pizza cutter, a serrated bread knife, an x-acto, a drill with a comically long bit, a pair of wire cutters, gardening shears, and an awl. she says okay im gonna start operating so look away if you dont wanna see how your crotch looks while its being rearranged. especially if you think you might puke, i hate having to stop to clean up puke in the middle of surgery. you look away. you notice amy is watching transfixed.

for a couple of hours things go on like that. amy and riley make light conversation, with riley filling any silence by humming a wordless tune you dont know. the sounds and smells youre getting are enough to make you slightly sick; you continue not looking.

in the middle of hour two, riley stops. oh goddamnit, she says. what amy asks? riley says she forgot that shed need extra meat. amy says you started a surgery to give somebody a whole new organ and forgot youd need more tissue to do it? riley says shut up, im dumb. amy says no youre not babe. riley says ughhhhh now what. amy says just get his stem cells to grow the tissue you need. riley says nooooooo thatll take forever, and i have places to BE tomorrow, and if i stop putting pressure on him here hes going to bleed out through his cunt. you say wait, what? amy says well i dont know what you want me to do about this situation, i gave you my solution. riley says baaaaaaaaaaabe. amy says whaaaaaaaaaaaat. riley says i think we have some bacon in the fridge, will you pretty please with sprinkles on top go get it? amy says and what do i get in return? riley says a kiss. amy says id get that anyway. riley says my undying love and affection. amy says i have that already. riley says not making me angry at you so you can sleep under my roof without having to worry that ill turn your sweat glands into acid glands in the middle of the night. amy says that, plus i get to top tonight. riley says fiiiiiiiiine, just go get the bacon. amy gets up.

you say look uh i know you said not to question what youre doing but i kind of dont want a dick made of bacon, not to sound ungrateful. also did you say something about me bleeding out? riley says dont worry, if you bleed out ill put the blood back in, im a professional. you say thats not as reassuring as she thinks it is. riley says whos the doctor, mister? you say technically both of us. i have a phd in social sciences you say. she says wow, theyre just giving out doctorates for anything these days, huh? you say hey, rude. she says only teasing. you say anyway, uh, you didnt address the bacon dick thing? she says oh dont worry about it, my amys amazing, youll see.

amy comes back in with the package of bacon. do you need this in any particular shape she asks. riley says nah just give me a good amount of it. and make sure its spongy, so when he gets hard the blood can- amy cuts her off. she says dont worry, ive given you enough penises at this point that i think i know what penile tissue is like at this point. you say given her enough penises? what the hell does that mean? riley says hey, dont kinkshame! she sounds legitimately offended. you say sorry. amy pulls the bacon out of the package, holding it aloft in her left hand. you watch as the familiar look of a half-pound of bacon shifts and warps into a strange lump of fatty, spongy tissue of a waxy color. she hands it to riley. riley says thanks sis youre the best, love you! amy says no problem. riley says id kiss you if i wasnt elbow deep in this guys cunt right now. amy says kiss me after the surgerys done.

another two hours go by. the sounds of flesh being chopped, sawed, and stitched underscore riley and amys meaningless conversation about whether they HAVE to attend their acquaintance lisa's birthday party. riley says lisa probably wouldn't throw a birthday party if there wasn't some sort of scheme going on. amy agrees but says that doesnt indicate whether they should get involved with the scheme or not. you wonder dimly if you will ever feel your lower body again. you wonder if this is purgatory, an endless afternoon of lesbians bickering affectionately while one of them does surgery on you. you turn your head enough to look at the clock. its 5:26pm. where the fuck did the time go?

another hour passes. riley stands up. she is soaked up to her elbow in various bodily fluids - mostly blood, but youre not looking too closely. she says finally! she says just need to regrow your nerve cells now. you say is that going to take long? she says like twenty minutes maybe as she flips you over. you say ok. she jams a different needle into the same spot, injecting a strange yellow paste into your spine. she then flips you onto your back again. you feel brave enough to finally look at your crotch.

there is a completely normal human penis of average size there. you reach a hand down and touch it. you dont have any sensation in it yet since your nerves are all still dead, but it feels warm and soft under your hands. you smile, feeling tears come to your eyes. its over.

rileys talking. she says i followed your specifications except i had to cheat a bit on the nerves, you actually didnt have very many in your clit for whatever reason so your glans has maybe eight thousand fewer nerves than you wanted, sorry about that. she says i gave you balls in your scrotum for shape but since you said you didnt want kids they dont produce sperm. let me know if you want that changed she says. she says it should be fully functional in every respect, but if you notice any erectile dysfunction, incontinence, discoloration in urine or semen, priapism, or any other issue come back and we'll sort it out. if you notice it bleeding in ANY capacity, call me immediately. if im not answering call Amy, ill give you her number. if SHES not answering either then you can start seeing normal doctors, not that those idiots will know how to help you probably. if you want any changes to it call me and ill pencil you in to get it adjusted. get all that she asks. you nod. she says cool. she says itll be like $200, no rush if youre not able to pay right now. you say it might be a bit since youre still trying to pay interest on your student loan debt. wait, she says, they have student loans again? you nod. she says the world ended like thirty years ago, when did they set up student loans again? fuck, how much do you owe? you say a little under eighty thousand. she says jesus fuck, nevermind, its free. goddamn. you say thank you so much. she says yeah of course. do you want us to dress you or do you want to wait until you can move and do it yourself?

[gorgeouslypink]

hey guys! in my previous post, i said that if you needed to vent, you could do so in my asks and I read every single one of the asks and to be honest, I was so teary eyed. everyone's stories were so heartbreaking and their feelings were so raw and genuine and honestly, it reminded me a lot of my old situation and how much i struggled and it made me want to do something, which is why I'm making this post.

this is going to be a 3 day challenge to improve your void concept so you can really get into the void! read through it and modify it how it best suits you. also, a lot of this was taken from my anon's success stories so trust me, you will succeed.

day 1: choose a subliminal for the void state and you're going to listen to it as much as you can for the entire day. a lot of my anons succeeded with this one, this one, and this one and if you're in a position where you just can't listen to any sounds, use this silent field. if you just can't listen to subliminals, then do this exercise how many ever times you want. (yes, you can do the exercise and listen to subliminals).

basically take this day as a subconcious repgramming day, don't worry about anything else. try staying off tumblr and just doing fun stuff and if you really are addicted to tumblr/void, then read all my proof portfolio links. but basically all you're doing this day is letting the affirmations sink into your brain so that your subconcious beliefs are aligned with the 3d you are trying to create.

that night, i want you to do this shifting hypnosis video (no you wont shift if you dont want to) and basically after she finishes talking, affirm your void concept affirmations (the void is easy, i always wake up in the void, etc ) over and over. you might actually end up entering the void or waking up in the void from this alone but even not, it takes you a pretty deep meditative state where you can really reprogram your subconcious mind.

day 2: this day you're going to be repeating day 1's activities except instead of the shifting hypnosis (unless you really ended up liking it), anytime you want, you're going to do this instant manifestation portal meditation, because it just feels so good and works so well so honestly, don't be shocked if you end up waking up in the void this day.

day 3: this day repeat whatever it is that made you feel good from the 2 previous days and then that night, do this parallel reality meditation. it's basically just a meditation to put you into your ideal state but they worded it as shifting to a parallel reality in which you exist as your ideal state but yeah, it's just a powerful tool to help you enter a state of having your ideal void concept and always entering the void easily. honestly if you don't want to do the entire challenge but want just one powerful thing to do, i recommend this. just try it out and trust me, you won't regret it.

i feel like this challenge comes off as a lot but it's just because i explain too much. here's a simplified version:

day 1: listen to sub or do reprogramming exercise and then at night, do hypnosis video

day 2: listen to sub or do reprogramming exercise and then do instant manifestation portal mediation (yes you can do hypnosis video again if you want)

day 3: listen to sub or do reprogramming exercise and then do parallel reality meditation (basically meditation to enter ideal state)

anyways, don't be shocked if you commit to the challenge and end up not being able to finish it because you already entered the void before the 3 days are up and if you do successfully complete it, your void concept is going to be so good and you already know you're going to enter the void so easily.

i really hope all of you do this or atleast your own version of it and i really wish the best for everyone 💗

[lesbianicbitch]

Christmas Time {Wanda Maximoff × Fem!Reader}

Warnings: sum mention of fucked up past, fluff, not too long

PoV Y/n

I couldnt sleep. It was December 24th, late at night and i was awake with my girlfriend, Wanda. We had been watching those cheesy Christmas movies for hours on end now. Why? Because hell i was excited for Christmas.

The past years, i never really got to celebrate, because i was living in a shitty household with abusive people. It wasnt a great time, but one day, I discovered i had some kind of super powers. I was able to shapeshift. It was super cool, i always turned into other people.

The avengers had soon seen me, while in a fight. Wanda saved me from getting crushed by some falling down building pieces. I had looked at her, absolutely stunned because of her beauty. I didnt know if i wanted to be with her, or be her. Yeah well, then i felt something tingly in my body and the witch had looked at me with a shocked expression. I turned myself into her. Funny story, because now, she was my girlfriend and i was with her and could be her.

Well, lets get back to the point.

The Avengers took me in and i was now a big part in the team. Everything felt like family, the family i never really had. We had movie nights, would go out, Tony loved hosting parties for literally no occasion. They were always a lot of fun, and also i told Wanda about my feelings towards her at one of those parties. Yes, yes I was drunk, otherwise i was too shy to speak to her.

"My love? Are you okay?" My girl pulled me out of my thoughts. "Huh? yes! I just thought about how lucky i am to have you as my girlfriend" I said with a smile. "Aw, youre adorable. But dont you think we should get some sleep soon? Its already like 2 am and we have Christmas tomorrow!" Wanda smiled. "I knooow, but im not tired and i wanna see Santa" I whined. "Baby, as much as it hurts me, but Santa doesnt exist, you know that" Wanda sighed. "No he exists, dont say he doesnt, you wont get presents otherwise. I put some cookies and milk out for him! I swear itll be gone when we go into the living room tomorrow!" I said, looking at Wanda. She laughed and turned off the TV. "Yeah for sure it will, now come on. If you dont sleep now, Santa wont come for you Baby" my witchy said. "Fine.. but dont you dare take my presents away from me. I gotta pee before i sleep" I mumbled, a little grumpy. I always got grumpy when i was sleep deprived, and i have been awake for super long. "Fine, but hurry your cute ass" Wanda laughed.

i stood up and went into the bathroom and after I finished my business, i washed my hands. Thats when i heard it. Bells, bells of a sleigh. I rushed out to our window of the avengers tower, looking over New York.

"Wands!! Come look!!" I squealed happily. "What is it now, did you see Santa?" Wanda laughed but came over to me. I pointed outside to a sleigh, guided by reindeers. And in that special, flying sleigh, there he sat. Santa Clause. I felt like a little child, overly happy that Santa did exist. Just like i had said. I waved in excitement while wanda stood next to me, mouth agape, not believing her own eyes. Santa waved back to me, making me jump up an down. "did you see that? Santa waved to me! I told you he was real! Santa Clause waved to me!!!" I danced and flapped with my hands happily. "Yeah.. I saw that, my Love.." Wanda said, still stunned by what she had seen.

Eventually, Wanda succeeded in pulling me to bed, having me trapped in her arms. "Santa Clause waved to me.." I whispered, before i fell asleep with a smile on my face.

The Christmas Morning came, and I awoke, being showered in kisses all over my face. "Good morning and happy Christmas my love" Wanda said with a smile, before placing a kiss on my lips. "Happy Christmas darling" I said after kissing her back. "Did you sleep well?" I asked, while sitting up. "More than that, how about you?" wanda replied, pulling me into her arms. "Yes, the very best" I giggled, hugging her tightly.

"Now come on!! I wanna unwrap my presents! I giggled, pulling Wands up with me. We wore matching Pyjamas, both in a Christmas design. Mine was with Rudolph, the red nosed reindeer, and hers was with Santa Clause. We looked absolutely adorable.

Wanda and I went into the Kitchen that was connected with our living room, seeing the big Christmas tree with all those presents underneath. I jumped up and down happily, before saying good morning to everyone. They found my happiness adorable, as they knew i never experienced Christmas very happily. "Before you can unwrap, we all eat breakfast together, we do that every year, come here baby" Wanda smiled, pulling me on her lap at the table. When i got too excited over something, i wasnt able to sit still on my own, so wanda loved having me sit on her lap.

We had various things for breakfast, pancakes, bacon, toast, fruit salad and way much more. It was an amazing breakfast and we talked about so many subjects. Peter, MJ and Aunt May also came to the compound, Tony invited them over. Tony and Pepper where parent figures for me, and May was.. well, like an aunt to me. Peter was like a brother. It was the best family. Nat and Yelena were also like aunts, and Kate was my best friend in the world. She wasnt here today sadly because she spent Christmas with Clint and his family. But theyd come over tomorrow!

Steve could be a bit annoying but other than that, he was alright. Bucky was actually a softie, and Thor and Loki were like uncles. I loved Asgard, and i loved hanging with auntie Carol and Valkyrie. I had a big family, and it was the best family i could wish for.

Finally, we finished breakfast. everyone noticed i couldnt sit still any longer and we decided on doing the dishes later. We all went into the living room, everyone looking for a place to sit.

I loved sitting on the floor, so Wands and i settled onto our big fluffy carpet, me sitting between her legs. It was cozy, everyone was wearing their Pyjamas still, all in a Christmas design.

We all gave each other some gifts, wanting to unwrap them at the same time, while talking a bit over this and that.

Wanda insited I opened hers first and she should open mine. I had gotten Wanda a necklace with our names engraved in a heart and a bracelet that belonged with the necklace which had the date we got together engraved. She was very happy about it and asked me to put the jewelry on her. Then I unwrapped what i got from her. I gasped a bit. It was a ring, not an engagement ring, but a promise ring. It had our initials and our date engraved. She slid it onto my finger and I kissed her. "Thank you so much my love"

Time went by, all presents were unwrapped. Natty got new knifes to fight with, Yelena got a new vest with lots of pockets and I had knitted Thor some gloves, fitting for Stormbreaker. Loki got a new green coat and Bucky polish for his metal arm. Steve got the same polish, but for his shield. Peter got a new lego set while May had gotten a new Jumpsuit.

I had also gotten a new CD of my favorite artist, concert tickets for them from tony and yelenas old vest. I got such cool presents, and this was really the happiest Christmas i had ever had in my whole entire life.

Now we all sat in the kitchen, drinking hot chocolate with marshmallows

"Oh my god, i forgot to tell you! Last night, Wands and I saw the real Santa Clause!! I swear it was him! He was in his sleigh, with the reindeers! He even waved back to me!" I said with a huge grin.

Everyone looked at me dumbfounded, not believing me. Then they looked at Wanda, who nodded. "I saw him too!" Peter said, grinning at me. "Yeah, me actually too" Yelena added to the convo. "Since you explained us who Santa is, we saw him as well" Thor and Loki said. "I uhm.. i did too" Bucky said with a slight smile.

"I told you, Santa was real!" I giggled before kissing Wanda on the lips.

[onepiece-asl-lover]

Reader my au x ASL trio

A headcanon that I thought of.

An old someone work inspired me. Important info: I have an entire series about my Y/N stories but if you only want to read this then here is a small sum it up. Y/N ate a devil fruit which allows her to control ink in various ways but as she is young she isn’t able to control, as well is the power of the fruit a spirit lives inside it. She was used because of her devil fruit. TW: Self-hate, injuries, Female Y/N, fighting, Y/N x Ace.

You noticed Ace had been angry for a couple of days you didn't know why he seemed if something pissed him he'll just burst. Sabo told you he was having a rough week by the looks of it.

You sat next to Sabo as you watched Luffy and Ace arguing about a random thing again. You sighed as you looked at Sabo.

"What is it now?" You asked.

"They were training with each other and Ace was saying his moves sucked." Sabo replied.

You look at the two fighting boys in front of you until Luffy called you.

"Hey Y/N I want to prove a special move I made but it won't work on Ace so can you do it instead."

You nodded as you stood up and went where Luffy was as you grabbed your pipe that you always had on your side even if it wasn't necessary. You looked at Luffy.

"Okay come and hit me" Luffy said.

You raised an eyebrow. Why would you need to hit him? You never hit any of them at all of course you hit other people them was a no. You were too afraid that ....might happen.

"Why, do I need to hit you, I dont want to hurt you?" You looked as you tilted your head.

"You won't this move in unbeatable" Luffy said as he got into a stance. But you shaked your head as you looked at him.

"Still I might hurt you...but I'll do it just not a very strong point"

"Ok! Let's go!"

Before you could start your attack Ace sits up and his face is darken as you look at him.

"You'll never get strong if you keep holding yourself back, Y/n. I always tell you that" he said, holding his pipe. "Just because we are your friends you don't have to hesitate".

You nodded. "Yes bu-" Ace cuts you off.

"No buts, now come on try and attack me and I'll show you how it's done."

You shake your head "I'm not going to hit you." You reply back.

"Then I'll start it" Ace says as he dashes towards you and raises his pipe.

You block his attack with your pipe as you get thrown back a little.

"That's all you can do?" he asked with a smirk and you pursed your lips, then attacked him again.

You guys keep attacking you blocking his attack while he attacks you. You dodge one of his attack by a hair as you try and stop his barging attacks.

Luffy and Sabo looked at you intensely and while the former looked at you two with a proud smile, the latter felt a strange sensation inside himself, as if something was wrong.

You both still keep attacking as you try blocking his attacks as you didn't want to hit him. He was able to let you drop your pipe when he hit the weapon out your hand as he went behind and kicked your knees as you fell to the ground.

"That hurt you know!" You say as you turn around to look at him as you stood up.

As dashed at you as you blocked his attack.

"Ace! Listen already!" You shout as he keeps attacking you but you not attacking him.

If Ace wanted to encourage you to be stronger... Well, at that moment he was NOT succeeding at all.

The more you both fought the more you felt pain course through your body which wasnt a good sign..it ment that your devil fruit will act randomly.

You start to slow down to let your abilities stay put as you didn't want it to be shown. You vision began to blur as you start to become more weak and unstable.

"You should speed up Y/N the enemy won't hold back!" Ace says.

Sabo walks over to Ace to reason with him a bit.

"Hey Ace how about we sit down and you can fight me next?" Sabo tries to compermise.

"No there is no breaks in battle! The enemy might use it as an advantage!" Ace shouts as he hits you again as you fall back blocking his forced attack with your pipe.

You look back up as pipe is in your face. He keeps attacking you again as you try and dodge his attack.

The more you continued to fight, the more Sabo realized that he wasn't wrong about the strange feeling of before. Sabo had noticed how the more time passed, the more you were getting tired and it was becoming more and more difficult to keep up with Ace. He didn't understand Ace's sudden determination to keep you fighting and he didn't understand why he was almost more violent than usual at that moment.

Ace hits your knees with his pipe as you fall to the ground. As you look up you see Ace running towards you probably ready to start another group of attacks. Your body couldn't moves as images flashed in your mind. The screaming, the pain, the violence.

Ace kept coming at you but when he got close enough your body was in a trance already as in your head Ace was them.

"Ace, get out the way!" You shouted as all three boys raised an eyebrow Ace still running.

You raised your hand as ink flows out quickly another huge ink ball shielding you and the ink hand going straight at Ace. The ink spreads into a bigger piece of ink. Ace barely dodges it getting a cut on his head from it. You curl up inside the shielding ink ball covering your ears as you sniffle.

The ink hand goes to attack Ace and Sabo and Luffy go to help him out as more more attacks are launched at them.

You find it hard to breathe as you rock yourself trying to calm down. The ink ball around you gets bigger and bigger as you try to calm down and you can here Luffy, Sabo and Ace shouting from outside.

You see a scary creature you dont know who but he is a couple's feet from you inside the ink ball. He has red eyes and a wide open jaw. He walks towards you as you stumble backwards and try to run.

The man comes close enough he grabs your face as he looks you dead in the eye.

A hole appears in the ink ball around you and you see Sabo, Luffy and Ace trying to dodge the ink attacks as they get several cuts.

"You see that. Look at what you done. They might as well leave you dead after this. Maybe even it was all a game to them a simple item to entertain them and you were a fool to believe them as your friends"

"No! I'm sorry! I don’t want this to happen" You screamed but was muffled by the illusion person.

The monster looks you dead in the eyes, giving a look that can kill. When you felt that you were about to pass out the creatures suddenly drops you.

You pant heavily as you look around the black void that is slowly retreating back to you.

The Ink fully disappears around you as you stand up, tears gathering in your eyes threatening to fall.

You look up to see the three boys looking back at you slightly injured. You lower your head as you step on your heels and run into the forest ignoring the shouts from the boys behind you telling you to wait.

They probably were scared of you. Is the look in their eyes hatred, disgust. This was too much much for your young mind to understand.

You sat under a tree as you tried to keep composure. You didn't know what to do, they were the only people you knew....and cared about. You were just about hopeless without them.

Thoughts and ideas invaded your mind as you think about what happened and what will happen. Were they just using you...would they stay away from you...wish they never met you?

Your lips trembled you let small tears fall down your face onto the grass. Your throat started to burn and your heart started feeling tight in your chest. You didn't know why you had other reasons to cry about but this reason hit you right in the heart almost like you couldn't breath. Is this what people called an "Anxiety Attack"

You curled up into a ball as you stared to cry begging who ever to help you.

With Ace,Sabo and Luffy

The sun was starting to set and Ace, Sabo and Luffy were returning home. Luffy was sad that you were gone and Sabo had tried to reassure him, while at the same time he was trying to talk some sense into Ace.

"Ace... Don't you think you went too far?" the blond asked him.

In front of him, Ace clenched his fists.

"Ace! Ace!" Sabo called him, annoyed.

"Answer me!"

"Shut up! Stop making me feel more guilty than I already do!" Ace exclaimed, suddenly turning to look at him.

Sabo and Luffy stopped in their tracks, taken aback.

"Well, then you should have not made her cry and scared like that!" Sabo retorted, angry at what had happened. "Y/n is not weaker than us and you need to stop treating her like she is. Why did you act like that?"

"I was stupid, you're right okay? I didn't...want that to happen" Ace continued, letting out a sigh and lowering his gaze to the ground.

"I didn't want to say those words and to her and make her feel scared..... I want all of us to realize our dream and i want to see her become a pirate. But i just want her to know how to protect herself when she's has to come to decisions where life turns on you I know she strong but I know you and Luffy are good at fighting, but... I don't know, it's just that when it comes to her i'm always afraid that something will happen to her and-"

"You become more protective" Sabo interrupted.

"We understood that you love her more than us. I might get offended by this, you know?"

"I don't love her more than you! She's like my sister and I worry about her, that's all!"

"Sure, if you say so"

"Sabo!"

After a little while later, they reach the treehouse.

"Y/N is probably in the our treehouse!" Luffy exclaimed.

"I hope so let's checks" Sabo says as he started climbing his way to the tree house.

"Ya,I hope..I have to apologize" Ace mumbles as he begins climbing towards the treehouse.

Luffy climbed up to the treehouse looking around.

"I cant find her!" Luffy shrugged as checked every place in the place you could be.

"Then where could she be?" Sabo asked as he looked aswell.

"She wouldn't be at the hags place when she's upset..maybe she is with Makino" Ace says as he waste no time climbing down the tree and running towards the village, Luffy and Sabo barely catching up.

“Makino!” All the boys shout as they run into the bar.

“Hm? Yes, do you guys need something?” Makino questioned as she turned around, drying a beer glass in hand.

“Have you seen Y/N!” They all asked.

“No, I haven’t seen her today. Aren’t you four always together?” Makino asked.

“Ya but something happened.” Sabo says.

"Oh is that so, well I hope you guys figure it out" Makino smiles as she goes back to cleaning.

"Okay so we have checked with Makino, the treehouse and the old hags place and Great terminal, where else could she be? It's becoming late aswell" Sabo asks seeming quite concerned.

"I don't know" Luffy says swinging from a tree branch tiredly.

"I guess we should just sleep for now, she'll probably come around sooner or later." Ace recommends.

"I guess that okay" Sabo confirm as all three of the boys went into their treehouse and slept well not as peacefully with you on their mind missing, except Luffy you didn't mind.

You finished with your meltdown, and without even knowing till now you were scratching your palms so hard that they bled. You didn't even feel it!

It was late during the night when your gaze meets the treehouse where you and your "friends" slept in and played in. You don't even know if you should call them that anymore.

You decide that you would sit in the treehouse and just soak in the familiar feelings. You didn't know what do before they woke up, would you run away, join the Blue Jam pirates, even just leave they entire island, those were crazy, but what else could you do, you're a lonely young child who has no power to change the world to what they believe is right.

You climbed up the treehouse and watched all three of the young boys fast asleep. It made you smile a bit. You went to the window and leaned near it, looking at the trees sway in the wind.

It been quite for a while here, the blood on your hands weren't bleeding as much now, thoughts ran through your head but you stayed quite and calm.

"Y/N?"

You heard from behind you. You wipped your head around startled by the sudden voice.

You saw it was Ace. He was standing near his futon, his hair quite ruffled up from his sleep.

You turned your head back to the window hoping that he would just go back to sleep and imagine that this was a dream. Of course not, nothing goes your way, he came next to you as you kept looking out the window avoiding his gaze.

"Where were you all this time!? Why did you suddenly run away like that." Ace whispered shouted. He knew why you ran away like that, He just didn't want to confess it.

You kept silent, your voice stuck in your throat. It was quite for a few minutes until Ace spoke up again.

"I want to say that..I am sorry that I yelled at you like that, made you overexert yourself, made you cry, made you fight me even tho you clearly didn't want to..I'm sorry" Ace sighed the last part as he tried to look for your reaction, fidgeting with his hands.

He didn't know why he was being so...sensitive and sympathetic with you right now if that was even the right word.

Ace view came over to your hands where he saw scratches littering it, some of the scratches bleeding. Without talking he went over to the corner of a treehouse grabbing small bandages and walking back to you. He carefully and gently grabbed your palms so he didn't scare you.

He wrapped bandages around your hands and tightened it when finished so it stayed on. He removed his his own hands away from yours waiting to see if you'll say anything

You looked at your bandages and see how carefully they've been wrapped. One second you were looking at your bandages and the next you were hugging Ace tightly. You and Ace were surprised, why did you hug him so suddenly, was it because you felt it was right?

You didn't know but you just stayed there hugging Ace, while he softly hugged back flustered, like a lot. It wasn't until a slight diffrent emotion crossed his face as he heard small sniffles. When he felt his shirt where your face was getting wet by specifically tears he worried and may have been a bit dramatic.

"H-hey! Why're you crying! Stop crying!" He whisper shout harshly as he waves his hand around.

You stopped your crying as you just hugged Ace, finally speaking up.

"I was scared... that you'll guy's will hate me...or something like that" You murmured.

You couldn't see his face at the moment, but Ace was dumbfounded and a big sense of guilt washed over him. No..how could anyone hate you, you are amazing, beautiful, and strong...You’re the one who is suppose to hate them, not the other way around.

"I'm sorry for saying those things—I didn't mean to make you feel bad. I just worry about you a lot, even though I know you're fully capable of handling yourself. You're not weak, alright? I believe you have everything it takes to become a great pirate!" Ace shouted but nothing too loudly to wake up Luffy and Sabo but enough to get it through your head.

You moved your head to look at Ace, wide-eyed by his response. He did care. You smiled softly at him.

"Thank you Ace"

Sabo and Luffy woke up early in the morning.

"AH that was a great slee!-" Luffy shouted until his voice was muffled by Sabo as he slaped his hand over Luffy's mouth.

"Sabo!" Luffy tried to form to Sabo.

"Shhh" Sabo shushed Luffy as he pointed to a wall under the window in the treehouse where you and Ace both leaned on eachother for support; fast asleep.

"Y/N BAC!-" Luffy tried to exclaim.

"Shh"

"Oh okay, shhh" Luffy nodded, putting his pointer finger to his mouth in a "silent" formation.

Sabo went over to you and Ace where he grabbed two blankets and covered you and Ace separately, daring not to wake you both up.

Luffy and Sabo quietly left the treehouse leaving Ace and you in a quiet and calm sleep.

[youremyheaven]

How does sensuality work? I never understood (probably because I am way too stuck in the head). Sometimes I aspire to be honestly, though it doesn't come naturally unfortunately.

OMGGG I love this question 🤪✨😍

I consider myself very sensual 🥰🤪😜 and I realllyyy enjoy being in that energy 😌🫣🙈

First of all, lets begin by understanding what sensuality is and what it is not.

There is a world of difference between sexuality and sensuality. they're like night and day.

and you can be one without being another. because of the culture we live in, most people are sexual without being sensuous.

Sensual is understood as involving the five senses but also being sexually suggestive.

Sexual means relating to sex

Sensuality is more about enjoying yourself and life than it is about sexually pleasing or being sexually inviting. Sensual people seem more alive and vibrant because they truly enjoy the simple things and fine things, so they dont sweat the small stuff and usually maintain a calm and relaxed demeanour.

Sexual energy is more frantic, more wild, more aggressive. its very in your face and hard to miss. its someone asking you to give it to them, basically.

Sensuality is self-contentment and enjoying pleasure in all its many forms. be it food, music, dance, art, walking, looking at the sunset. A sensual person just enjoys absolutely everything. When you're in the presence of that energy, you feel similarly relaxed and open. They come across as warm, open and welcoming, its comfortable being around them. Someone who is fully alive will always naturally be perceived as "sexy" because they signal that they're open to enjoyment and pleasure.

All of these are subconscious impressions we form of people in nanoseconds, and whether we know it or not, we all pick up on energy and treat people accordingly. Why do we feel like being nicer to some people and standoffish with others??? its all down to the vibe. you can be a "good" person and still feel like you cant be good to some people who havent even done anything to you. its all just vibes.

I suggest reading Uses of the Erotic by Audre Lorde to understand this more. It's an essay and it's only a few pages long and she describes being erotic as a feeling of being alive.

pleasure activism by adrienne maree brown is another book i recommend on this topic.

now onto HOW to be sensual

Sensuality means being fully alive, open and vibrant. So in order to be sensual, you have to embody that.

You correctly said that you're too in your head and feel disconnected to sensuality because in order to be sensual, we have to get out of our head and into our bodies.

Sensuality necessitates forming a deep profound connection with our bodies.

This is why dancing is so sensual. just moving your body can feel so vulnerable but there is nothing as sexy or confident as someone who knows how to move???

there are many dance centered trauma release + "feminine flow" type activities. i know many of you get the ick from hearing things like "feminine flow" and i dont blame you lmao but being feminine, strictly energetically speaking means being relaxed, soft and flowing. thats Yin energy in Daoism.

dating in our era sucks because even men want princess treatment and it shows that Yin energy is def something that can be channelled by people regardless of gender lmfao xD

now many people have adopted a very harsh, aggressive "go-getting" approach to succeeding our toxic capitalist patriarchal world and whilst that might help us make some progress, we're constantly at the risk of burnout. so its in our best interest and for our long term well being to learn how to be chilled out and not sweat the small stuff.

think of Yin energy as the energy of being chilled out.

we can win and gain things by fighting for it but isnt it better to gain the same things in a softer gentler way??? you can work 200 hours a week, suck up to your boss and do all the extra work and someone else who does none of that will get 5 promotions while u get nothing. basically, life is not "fair", i.e, our efforts aren't necessarily going to be compensated for adequately and if you can get better results by doing less and chilling more, then whats the harm????

people who go far in life are often just people who are pleasant and fun to have around. look at any self-made individual and they'll have boat loads of charisma. whereas nepo babies wont even know how to hold a conversation bc they never had to lmao

anyways sorry for getting sidetracked (me everytime i talk lmao)

Do more body-centric activities to feel more connected to your body

this can be dancing, yoga, pilates or any exercise, or other hobbies like pottery, sewing, painting, basically anything you can do with the involvement of your body??? do that

they help you get out of your head and be in the here and now

being more present is like 50% of sensuality

and once you do things you care about more, you'll naturally shift to a place where you cut out things you dont enjoy and people you dont want to be around. youll enjoy life more. its all connected.

When you see someone with that raw earthy sexiness, don't they just seem so wild and free??

It's that. Someone who has that glow ✨

i hope this helped and provided some insights <333 i hope you get glowingggg <333

[aicosu]

Pathologic headcanons? You mentioned having a lot of them

So fucking many I dont know where to start? Maybe with bigger ones? Then character ones?

The Town/Kin

- I actually played much of p2 first before playing 1 and then returning to finish 2. So I have a lot of attachment to the Kin, and Boddho and their pov.

-I think that Boddho is an empty nesting eldritch mother. That she either is like... Illuvatar from Silmarillion (from what my husbands told me) where she came or grew from earth and wanted to make specificslly humans, but made the worms and brides and shabnaks first at her version of the Valor, or their job is to prepare the world for her true children (humans). even as "excess materials" shabnaks excess bones, worms excess muscle, and brides excess blood. But she didnt expect them to grow out of their need for her. Steppe life does eventually evolve towards integrating with the settlement and she resents creations who can create towers to heaven without her. Hence plague. But again, boddho creates creatures who are individually sentient. Even some of the proto kin seem rebellious. So I imagine the plague too, is sentient with its own ideas and goals. Poor boddho seems a bit immature and frustrated that yes. Eventually, even the plague and kin will want to grow and elvove without her.

-or shes already dead. Love the dead boddho theory, thanks andrey stamatin. That maybe everyone who hears boddho is just hearing her talk from centuries ago cause shes to unfathomable and eldritch creature to speak to. Neat! I think it doesnt hold up in 2, since you see her (someones?) Heart beating but cool.

-i do think the proto humans have preferences but dont know what a preference even is. Theres obviously (in p2, i know p1 was more an obvious patriachal straightfoward thing) brides who prefer townsfolk and brides who prefer the steppe. There are worms who like the city people they make friends with, and shabnaks that feel fear but aspire to grow ans meet and learn langauge.

Daniil Dankovsky

-trans daniil just makes so much damn sense to me its stupid like its perfect. At first I thought maybe he was amab and experiencing gender envy at the women in the town, coming to a conclusion he's in denial of why he favors their company or feels a sort of kinship with. To me, women are to Daniil what children are to Artemy. His bound in 1 as the uptopians is eh to me, but yet anytime he is speaking with Lara or Yulia, even Aspity, there is a understanding, condescending, even familial, protective frustration he has thats so complicated.

-to me that works so well as his journey as afab. Only child. Born to a young dead mother and a military man who didnt want much to do with him.

-I imagine him pursuing college and medical school for a year before his father dies and he drops out to transition. Ive seen other fans of transkovsky say he invented hrt himself, but if I think about how medical was approached or even philosphized about in patho or the older days I think he approached it by killing singular nerves and doing invasive surgey. They werent super great at the hormone or brain level and its just more... danils style to think to himself "i will literally kill what i dont need or want" (and then wearing uterus trophies on his neck because he cant brag out loud)

-which leads me to my other headcanon that this secret invasive self experiments and his success at splicing himself gave him a bit of cancer or a debilitating "mystical" disease he refuses as mystical. While i do love daniil being pompous about defeating death just cause hes pompous, I also love the idea that he wants all his cake and flowers. He succeeded in defeating gender, birth, orientation, and now its making him die? How unfair. How horrible. No one will steal his time at finally being himself not even death.

-thanatica I see as a mask over that research, too. Cause he can not come out and show himself off to substantiate his achievements. The medical world would be too distracted by the social ques to care that, hey, I've stopped cell generation. I've propugated cells. I've made parts of a body grow that stopped in the womb. Its a breakthrough he cant discuss so hes hauling in dead bodies and reanimating skin with the same methods or stacing off tuberculosis with the same technique hes using to stave off his death disease and it give him all this internal, unvalidated, seething frustration that he cant just scream what a fucking genuis he is. (He does anyway but without that to back him up)

-I think he joins the military for a year or two and assumes the identity of a dankovsky son. And the military stupidly, weirdly, validates him in his identity but also hardens him the way war does. The way death does when you have soldiers dying on your medical table. Then goes back and finishes his degree before opening thanatica.

-i hc Daniil as a messy bisexual. I think pre transistion he was always attracted to women actually, and that also motivated him to a smaller degree of well, why not get married to a lovely lady. Why not be the head of my household. Why not conquer society and genetics and death and enjoy things I could not myself feel comfortable to portray, but want to covet.

-you know and he gets to busy to actually finally indulge in that and then gets to town on ghorkan and meets artemy burakh and is like, wait, no, stop, this isnt the plan dammit.

-but I do think also that's complicated when it comes to sex and love. I can identify aapects or a gradient of a sexuality to him. Not necessarily demisexual, but his identity and his mind can get in the way of desires or even, that it takes a specific amount of vulnerability that he avoids. So maybe it's trauma or his being on the spectrum. So in his journey of self-discovery, maybe he's been a lot of whatever "labels." I think so much of labels and identity play into his vast acknlowdgement of philosophy too. Why talk about sex at all if we arent also talking about society and death and culture and etc (que daniil stopping his one night stand mid sentence to lecture about the differences of breeding expectations in different economic structures or population.)

-I ship daniil with Burakh mostly, (stamatins and block too at times) but I also ship him with the Marble Nest bride at the stillwater, who I guess is like a projected OC of mine. (Shes a special model, one of the only ones wearing jewelry and also one of the only kin whose sweet to daniil? She also seems critical of her own culture "weddings are a sad thing for us". I have a million headcanons and ideas for them two, who I think he names her Theralydice (thera for theraputrix the assitants to aescluipis or healers, therayl for feral or wild, and dice for custome or law as well as a common form for femininenames) Something heretically latin and inappropriate and artemy shakes him stupid for naming a bride at all- "but how will I refer to the only reasonable one burakh") but I wont bore you with all that crack.

OTHER:

Sorry this has already gotten so long so ill just list random other stuff.

-I think burakh is a man of little words not cause he's shy or reserved but because hes very smart about his town. He knows that information and gossip spread like wildfire. And stating his ideas, thoughts, plans, TO ANYONE so plainly (as dankovsky does) means in another twenty minutes 6 other people might find out and stop him. It's in his best interest to act stupid and complacent. It's the best idea to shrug at young vlad and go "idk maybe" because saying yes or no would maybe mean making an enemy.

-I think there are two eldritch horros now one. Aside from boddho i think the mistresses are hearing something else out there in the ether. Same as those whispers to peter about building the polyhedron. Boddho from this planet or not, something in that void is wanting to come in and use her or the earths power to its own end. Town on Ghorkon seems like an open battery everyone wants to suck dry. And while the kains can talk a big talk about plans for nina or simon, I wouldnt be suprised if someone or something kicked their souls out and took over for itself.

-I 1000 percent think Aspity is the first outbreak in human form if that wasn't already established. But I also dont think clara is. But I do love the idea that it's possible to do. In the same way, maybe annaAngell occupies Willows body? Hmm.

-also all yes to everyone is just actually dolls, but then wheres the fun in hc-ing the world lore???

[luvhughes43]

soccer royalty | trevor zegras x reader

luvhughes43 masterlist🌷

request: Trevor Zegras x Latina!reader where she’s the daughter, sister, and granddaughter of three famous soccer players from Mexico but when her dad retired they moved to the states to raise their family. Maybe shes very private with her life due to how famous her last name is in the Latino community, and when Trevor announces that they’re dating everyones freaking out because he’s dating soccer royalty and he’s just like “huh?” Because she never brought up who her family is. 

note: i know nothing about how soccer works

word count: 0.8k

soccer was in your blood. your father, grandfather, and brother were all accomplished and famous players. when your dad finally retired from the mexico national team, after helping mexico secure their first world cup win, your family name became cemented into the latino community. 

you grew up playing soccer in california, which came to no surprise to anyone. however, after an injury in your freshman year playing for the california golden bears, you were forced to quit the sport. after your injury, you sort of dropped of the face of the earth. you had felt so much pressure from your family, and families fans to be good at soccer, that now that it was all over for you, you were glad to just take a step back.

therefore, when you started dating pro athlete Trevor Zegras, you didn’t rush to tell him who your family was. he knew about your injury, and that your brother was on the mexico national team, but he didn’t know how famous your family was in the soccer world. 

trevorzegras

liked by ynuser, jackhughes, jamie.drysdale, and others

trevorzegras night out🌃🔥

tagged: ynuser

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fan1 BRO IS DATING YN LN???

ynuser ❤️❤️

trevorzegras ❤️❤️

fan2 does he even know who she is…

jackhughes congrats man🔥🔥

trevorzegras thanks jacky wacky

fan3 jacky wacky??😭😭

jamie.drysdale where was my invite??

ynuser you’re coming next time

jamie.drysdale next time where ditching trevy and going out on our own liked by ynuser

trevorzegras jamie.drysdale 🤔

fan4 hard launching yn ln is crazyy😭😭

Trevor sat next to you on his couch scrolling through his insta comments. he read through all the comments talking about your family and how famous you were in the soccer/latino community. 

“hey … yn” Trevor started, tilting his phone so you could read his comments. you froze, completely unaware of how Trevor was going to react now that he knows the truth about your family. “why didn’t you tell me about your family?” he asked, switching over to google so he could search your family name. 

“I was going to tell you I just… i dont know” you trailed off which made Trevor snap his head in your direction and drop his phone on the couch.

“oh baby i'm not upset!” he announced, grabbing onto one of your hands. 

“i just, my whole life i’ve been attached to my familys name and i just… i don’t know. after my injury and everything i’ve just wanted privacy away from it all” you explained, and Trevor nodded along to your every word. 

now that he knew, you explained everything to him. the pressure you felt, the injury, your family's fame. he listened and understood, holding onto your hand the whole time you were talking to him. you weren’t ashamed of your family by no means, you loved them and you loved your community, it was just nice to have privacy. 

a few days later you walked into Trevors room for your weekly movie night. 

“what are you watching?” you asked as you laid down next to him.

Trevor set his phone down but you still heard the audio. 

“are you watching my dads soccer highlights?” you laughed, succeeding in grabbing Trevor's phone from him. on the screen was a twenty minute compilation of your dads “best moments”. 

you laughed again and Trevor huffed, grabbing his phone back from you. “what? he’s good?” Trevor said as he lightly gripped your waist and pulled you in to cuddle with him. 

“you’re cute” you smiled, pulling away to place a kiss on Trevors nose. Trevors smile lit up his face and you felt butterflies rising in your stomach.

“You’re cuter” he replied, pulling you down to place a kiss on your lips, his hands trailing down your sides. 

“mhmm, and by the way my family wants to meet you” you pulled away from Trevor who looked at you with wide eyes.

“they what?” he asked a little frantically which made you giggle.

you hummed in response, “yeah my brother is playing a game in a few weeks and since it’s off season for you…” 

“oh my god i'm going to meet your family,” Trevor said, pulling away from you and sitting up. “AND we’re going to a soccer game? what do i wear to a soccer game? do you think they’ll like me? where’s the game at? okay but what if-” Trevor went off on one of his tangents, nonstop asking you questions about your family, and how meeting them would be like. you answered his questions once he slowed down, happy that he was excited to meet your family.

ynuser just posted !

ynuser

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ynuser trevors first pro football (soccer) game🫡⚽️

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yourbrother trevorzegras so cool to finally meet you!

ynuser yourbrother you have to come up for a hockey game now!

yourbrother ynuser i’m down

trevorzegras yourbrother it was cool to meet you too! loved the game⚽️💯

fan1 trevor meeting the family🔥

jamie.drysdale looking good trevorzegras

trevorzegras had the best time! thank you so much for bringing me! I love your family❤️

ynuser i love you😭❤️

trevorzegras i love you more❤️

[roodles03]

Unrecognized Talnet

For years, Willow struggled with her self-worth and self-esteem. Trapped in a track she hated, she was frowned upon her peers and teachers everyday. Her former best friend now bullied her every single day. She went a few years without anyone, before finally meeting Gus. The first person who didn't determine her value as a witch by her magical power. The teacher shamed and humiliated her everyday, and despite trying her hardest for years, she never got better. She kept failing.

Meanwhile, she had a natural talent for plants, but had to keep her talent and love for it a secret, as her dads had placed her in the abomination track. Forced to keep struggling when she could be succeeding, she doesn't want to disappoint one of the only people on her life who encourage her to suceed and that she can actually do this.

...yeah I just wanted to draw Willow by herself for once. But I always think about how miserable her life was after Amity's betrayal and wasting away in abominations. I fucking hate when people say that Willow going througb a little bullying isn't trauma and she shouldn't be upset because others had it worse. Fuck off with that shit. First off, dont compare people's trauma. That is gatekeeping and makes you look like an asshole. Second, having your only friend betray you, going on to bully you, on top of having no friends and everyone in your class hating you, takes a SEREVE mental toll on a child. (I would know.) Willow was alone for years until she met Gus, and thank Titan she met Luz, or else her true talent would've never been recognized. I appreciate Willow as a character representing such a realistic interpretation of what years of bullying does to a child. It's not pretty. This shit fucks you up for life.

[crsssie]

heyyy, congrats on 1k!! <3 wanted to request a matchup?? fandom is probs a date w death or dc :))

im 18, my personality is very black cat kinda!! im q sarcastic and a bit mean but i still care deeply for ppl and show it in my own ways yknow?? im intp/infp (it changes every time between those two), my zodiac is gemini and im pretty short, around 160cm...? w hazel eyes and black hair haha

my ideal type is honestly like entp esque ppl like kinda cocky and annoying but smart and caring like hahdjs i dont rly have an ideal date?? honestly just chilling and playing games while cuddling together sounds nice, js smth to spend time w them:)

congrats again on 1k!!!

boo

Casper scrunches his nose, staring at the dish and then the recipe on his phone. He's succeeded. Even your cat meows from the bed in agreement.

The door to your shared apartment clicks as you get home.

"Sunshine!" He calls, opening his arms for you as he greets you, face buried in your hair as he smiles. "I missed you."

"I missed you too." You hum. "I smell something good. Did you cook?"

"Yeah." He grins. "Your favorite."

Headcanons:

Casper is a smartass like literally in-game he's a smartass but he's sooo sweet with you :( world's biggest simp

he will steal flowers from the same granny. Just some random ass bird nabbing all her flowers (you live close by so you always drop by with sweets as compensation. she doesn't know he's the one ruining her garden)

He brings food to the table (threatening dead souls for money) but he's never gonna tell you that so you just question how he's able to pay rent despite being home all day

world's biggest simp. he will buy you shit in your online shopping cart if you don't delete it in time. He's down horrendous

You unironically call him Boo sometimes. It started off as a joke like Steve, but then it grew on you and you just decided to stick with it

[tobeywobey]

HELLO YES DID I HEAR JRWI ISAT AU OR PERHAPS JUST GENERAL THOUGHTS AND COMPARISONS?

hellooo :)perhaps

okay originally it was just me going crazy over the isafrin and fnc similarities. but i was like. wow odile sure is likejay ferin.

SO . chip being sif. right duh of course. because who else would be that mentally unwell. he can also speak celestial for some reason which i think ties back into that stars stuff. ALSO their memory stuff (when chip starts losing himself and has to kind of. put on a show of who he is. SOUND FAMILIAR?). sif losing his home country. chip losing his childhood. both having such little opportunity to get it back without risk of hurting themselves. chip and sif "ill keep all my feelings right here and then one day ill die" bitches.

gillion being isabeau .undergoing a serious change and. feeling like the person they were before is dead and gone at their hands. being often regarded as stupid just because theyre big and boisterous and the tank (of sorts). that religious aspect . But also. gill and mirabelle to a degree. being chosen . that idea of "people think im chosen for one thing but its actually this other thing that im too afraid to tell people" . aroace <3 . that religious guilt of "why was it me. surely someone else could have handled this better" and. feeling the weight of their world on their shoulders. the elders and the head housemaiden .

more chip stuff .something abt. loop being so upset that Sif is the one who. succeeded and the one who got his happy ending despite how Loop could never even. beat the king. is so chip to me. i dont know How to explain it but its so. chip almost being? angry at himself that. after all that pain he endured at the hands of price and to an extent the black rose. all it took to be happy was finding two strangers and letting them in. also that is very sif to me also

also i think about Siffrin and Bonnie’s relationship (post-eye injury) a lot. And i do think Bonnie and Ollie are relatively similar. I do think Ollie would have a similar reaction to learning about Chip’s ‘death’ that Bonnie did to Sif’s eye.

as for odile and jay i have less thoughts but jay being torn between land and sea, pirates and navy just like how odile is torn between ka bue and vauguarde. odile thinking her vaugaurdian roots would Suddenly Make Sense and she'd find that lost part of herself to no avail . jay feeling like shes always been distant from her family and not that perfect child .wishing she could have that just like Ava had . the two ultimately finding themselves with new companions and family in this foreign place.

[simmi23]

any headcanons on your version of Renata (Mrs afton)??

RENATA AFTON HEADCANONS OF SIMMIVERSE AU! *Disclaimer* (I don't own Renata Afton because I didn't create her, this is just a alternative universe of her in my own version and the creator is Mobox87, but I have added many different arrangements to this character because I dont want to affiliate to the og creator. This is not copying, more like inspiration. )

• Renata was a young sweet vulnerable girl, in her earliest years. She mainly spent most of her time being the "perfect" daughter for her extremely rich parents. But it wasn't a toxic family, don't worry. There was love in her home but also stress.

• Coming from a rich family, Renata was treated well and normally during her childhood, with many friends and happiness, although she did get some people to hurt her cause they were jealous, Rena would be so compassionate and let that be. She even knew how to kick butt, but really, she was shy.

• Even though her life was good, it was not great. Her parents started to expect more from Rena as she grew older, like about her teen years. Rena always wanted to be a ballet dancer or a pianist, but her parents wanted her to be a doctor, with this, Rena studied to be the best in her nursing school and medical degrees.

• As a teen, Rena was a cheerleader at her school for some time,, but also a simple girl who met William, who she had feelings for; but was afraid to ask since he was graduating earlier than her. But they got along pretty well and soon got closer.

• Renata's father, (who's name is Lorenzo K Rennings) was a CEO of a grand business that succeeded well in their city, but after Renata's mother passed away when she was 18, her father decided to join a (mafia group) but that was a secret he kept from Rena even though she already knew. Rena kept her distance from her father since he disapproved of her husband (William Afton).

• Renata's ethnicity in this AU is most likely Hispanic American , but she grew up in Utah as a teenager when she was studying her career as a doctor.

• Renata and William both have a beautiful loving relationship, they both admire each others work and care a lot for one another. Renata even designed some of the uniforms of Fazbears for William, while he created Ballora for her. (But she is not Ballora.)

• Here is that, Renata had 4 children with William and they are ALL related to him, even Brandy is. This is because they never cheated on eachother. Renata and William both took great care of their children, but after Renata died, William just couldn't handle life.

• Renata died from tuberculosis , this was whenever Brandy was 4-5 years old, and before the deaths in Fazbears/Fredbears. Renata managed to survive her condition for the first 6 days but eventually in the hospital she passed away from losing too much blood.

• Even though Rena is not an animatronic or Ballora, shes still a ghost that lurks around the afton house and watches over her family through heaven and she also knows about what happend to them.

• When Renata found out (as a ghost) that William did horrible crimes and deeds, Rena was very upset and resentful she almost didn't forgive him, but after a long time, in reunion, Renata decided to be compassionate and loving, and eventually she still cares for him. But she doesn't forgive william. She has some trust issues with him in some ways but only when he is suspicious. She almost went with the "I'll forget you but I'll never forgive you." But she didnt, she still loves him and her family. Renata will forever always be the most beautiful, loving, strong in a way, sweet, caring, and heavenly member of the afton family. (She's the only one that didn't go to UCN hell like the rest).

That's it! I'm proud of this

[mihai-florescu]

Can u explain to me the significance of anzu. If u wanna

Signed, someone that only knows of her as the self insert protag and wasn t aware she s somehow very important (i dont go here but i like hearin u talk about it)

Yes! Anzu is a character in her own right with a full backstory that expands beyond enstars actually, in ensemble girls, to the point where it makes me wonder at what point they decided to make enstars to show what she's been up to after leaving kimisaki (the school in engirls. There she is called angie, both angie and anzu are references to the pronounciation of the game titles themselves). She's also the older sister of the protagonist of engirls, a male transfer student from yumenosaki into kimisaki (the plot of engirls takes place in enstars 2 era, so her brother is actually still at yumenosaki during the first year of enstars, he's in the general course though, not the idol one).

The reason Anzu transfered is after a failed revolution she was part of in kimisaki. In that game she is a sort of ghost haunting the narrative, where a lot of characters still mention her (and compare iirc?) to her younger brother. I cant speak much of how this impacts him, ive only read a limited number of engirls stories, mostly ones from before he transferred. Heard the game ends with a timeloop he has to break, so im very curious to one day find a translation for That. So while that's happening over at kimisaki, but let's get back to enstars, where anzu gets another chance at a successful revolution and falls in love with idols in the process. Her presence and trickstars revolution solidifies that things are changing from the war into a hopeful future, the student council arent undefeatable, and there are still new characters that can appear and impact the flow of the story.

When trickstar were broken up by fine she stays and helps in the DDD in a way where, without her, trickstars revolution wouldnt have succeeded. She puts on a mask and joins on stage when the only other member left in the unit was subaru, and the minimum number of people to be qualified to perform is 2. She calls people from her old school in the crowd, amd her brother calls general course students, whose support for her trickstar lead to winning the first live against knights and make way for them to progress to the finals. In the end during the DDD finale it's her vote that makes the difference, going into overtime and making trickstar win. She's a regular person, not a genius, not even an idol, who had impacted the course of events time and time again until the end. She supported Trickstar's revolution, joined them on stage as support, i'd say she is the glue of the unit that helped keep it floating, made it a place to return to. On a grander scale, Anzu is a character who gets a second chance at a successful revolution that ends in happiness, something she had failed at kimisaki. Trickstar are the miracle that changes yumenosaki, but that wouldnt have been possible without anzu's support. Their 5th member.

A critique i see sometimes is that everyone ends up liking her for no reason but...thats not true? Many characters welcome her as a breath of fresh air and a needed new perspective, but others are aprehensive and untrusting in the beginning, it's not like her presence alone magically fixes everything as a deus ex machina or anything, she's actively working hard, to the point where she jeopardizes her own health in the process. And it's also not like she acts the same with all idols either, or doesnt have her own personality and input, she directly impacts their character arcs through her treatment, like in kaoru's case comes to mind first.

This is for ! era at least. I feel more confident talking about that one than !!, where she is part of the P association and experiences hardships and is undermined there, but i am not the person to talk about that as i dont feel like my knowledge of her role there is nearly good enough.

[musubiki]

i wanna know more ab the m34th finding out lime’s relationship to the cat witch bc id be like 🧍‍♀️ if i were them just kinda pissed

UHGUHGU THIS IM NOT SUPER SOLID ON!!!!! but i will talk about what i have in my head right now!!

so much potential in every route....one route would be: they recruited him under the assumption he wanted the cat witch for some kind of revenge (because witches bad. why else would one want to look so desperately for them), and is essentially ignorant of his relationship to her. UNTIL we get to some point where for some mission/reason/other, they find out about them.

in my head i see that episode going as: another member finds and hunts down mochi (a fight she almost loses, and a good time to showcase what the m34th can really do). when lime arrives to a near-exhausted mochi backed into a corner, said guy (whoever, one of the more sadistic members) is like "Goldwood! Look, I found her! That stupid bitch of a cat witch has been hiding in the capitol all along! You wanted first dibs right? Now you can do what you want!" anyway lime dismembers this guy. legitimately cuts him off mid-sentance (literally cuts off his arm. i want a cool scene with this asshole clamoring for his life, and lime reveals for the first time to anyone in the m34th that hes vowed to the cat witch before unaliving him)

and when some other members of the m34th arrive (far after that guy is dead and lime has taken mochi away somewhere safe), they start to deduce "Huh... these clean cuts were made by one of our weapons." and slowly over the course of a few days as the investigation into their fallen comrade progresses, it becomes increasingly clear how wrong they were about lime

this also leads to a fight between lime and the other members of the m34th (whoever was on-call in the capitol at the time. SOS emergency mission, someones gone rouge). a fight mochi wasnt apart of, as it started to go down as she was still covering. also a fight that marshal, clarinette, and the squad captain all turned and sided with lime right before the fight

(it was marshals idea. lime was ready to kill every person who tried to get to mochi, but before lime could get his hands dirty, marshal swooped in with the idea of "If we erase their memories of it, we dont HAVE to kill them, and your girlfriend wont be upset with you for it.") (side note: the m34th has a memory-replacement system similar to the memory replace spell witches use. its a little more complicated as the memories can be stored and retrieved with some kind of tech something, but if you can destroy those as well then its like it never happened)

between lime, marshal, clarinette, and the squad captain who covers for all of them, this actually does end up succeeding. (another sad moment for clarinette, helping a roughed up lime limp his way home and having to watch mochi run into his arms again after she just helped save his life)

BUT THE OTHER SCENARIO ALSO HAS A LOT OF POTENTIAL WHICH IS:

(under the same pretense they thought he was after revenge) the m34th knew where the cat witch was the whole time. they couldve easily helped him find her within weeks, but purposely kept him in the dark because they thought if he got what he wanted, he would lose motivation and wouldnt be as good a soilder (this route is better for showcasing the true power/reach/resources/spirit of the m34th)

in a subplot related to the frog witch, mochi gets summoned to the capitol palace by the king to find his missing son, the prince. none of their resources have been able to locate him, so the king figures the strongest witch is the next best bet. then their best m34th soilders (lime included) gets assigned to "watch" her during her mission under the orders of "i dont care how you feel, you arnt allowed to kill her until she finds the prince," and they have to spend the whole time pretending they hate each other and that they never met before in their lives

at the end, the prince is eventually found and mochi requests that if the m34th is going to keep watch over her, that lime be the one assigned to her since she knows him now post-mission. and lime has to pretend to be like "ah hate that cat witch, but this is for a paycheck and shes not super insufferable...so...fine." and so lime being in her guild is still in the dark to the rest of the m34th, but they DO know that he sees her at least semi-regularly with the "check-ins" (which gives birth to the "Cant believe you got seduced by a witch" things hehehe)

EITHER WAY I DONT KNOW YET