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felidform · 5 months ago

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came for the picrew info but now i REALLY wanna know ur oc world lore. what r the clans what r the folklores......

oh boy I'm still working on it (very slow at developing my ocs because my process is literally "wait until something cool spawns into my brain on its own") aaand I tend to focus more on the characters than the world but

I have two different warriors oc universes, H&S (heart and soul) and CO2 (cat ocs 2), they both take place in breezeclan + stormclan + mistclan which are set in the united states midwest. despite these two universes having the same setting they don't exist in the same universe, I just like reusing this setting (I also sometimes reuse characters from H&S and put them in CO2)

H&S has yarrowflame and juniperfang as protagonists, CO2 has smolderheart as its protagonist

this info about the clans is focused on how they are in CO2 because it's what I've been developing more recently and they're more fleshed out in it, but you can more or less apply MOST of this to H&S too:

breezeclan and stormclan have had a strong alliance that is slowly blending their territories together for about 8 years, cats are allowed to cross freely between breeze and storm territory and they regularly trade and share prey. mistclan isn't a part of it, they like being left alone and want to keep their territory to themselves but would also like to remain peaceful.

all three clans have HUGE respect for bobcats (called "lynxes" because it sounds cooler) and mountain lions (very rarely seen, called "lions" or sometimes "great cats"). they admire their independence (an idea that will be explored a lot in CO2's plot is the clans romanticizing the idea of self reliance despite their hugely social nature.)

during CO2's story smolderheart will also be discovering a cave lion fossil which will really shake things up. brand new great cat just dropped and it's REALLY large and ANCIENT!

individual clan info:

breezeclan: - very large, large enough that cats that aren't in important positions aren't expected to know the names of everyone - territory is an even mix of forest, woodland, and prairie - breezeclan cats are commonly warm and friendly individuals - they were the first clan to figure out gardening and much of their clan identity is focused on their gardens. their territory boasts lots of colourful plants and wildflowers. - plants are raised for medicinal purposes primarily, but are also used as bait for prey animals, and as extra flavour for meals - gardeners and medics are separate roles, and both are eligible to become leader just like warriors are - warriors are separated into three semi-unofficial specializations: hunters, fighters, and denkeepers - recent years have been so peaceful that there has been little need for border patrols, and so a relatively new role was created to allow more cats to focus on other activities while still keeping an eye on everything happening on the territory: seekers (short for "seeker of knowledge") - seekers are not mentored for their role, this is intended as a challenge to learn how to find information yourself rather than it being handed to you. (this doesn't mean you can't ask anyone for help, it just means you need to come up with the questions to ask yourself). they spend a large portion of their day outside of camp, looking for Things that the rest of the clan might like to know about and keeping an eye on what's happening outside camp constantly. breezeclan only has 1-3 seekers at a time because 1. you have to be hand selected for the role by the leader 2. not many cats want to be out and about constantly, it gets lonely!

stormclan: - medium sized, more like canon warriors clans are population wise - territory is almost entirely forest. it contains lots of limestone and their camp takes full advantage of this fact, it's very protective - stereotypically stoic, strong, and proud cats - they don't have as many different roles as breezeclan (they're pretty much same roles as canon warriors) but have started to experiment with the idea, particularly they are starting to phase out border patrols and discussing the idea of implementing a seeker role - they've also started to pick up gardening since they allied with breezeclan

mistclan: - small clan! there's like maybe 12 guys here - woodland and wetlands/marshes territory, generally lots more open area than the other two clans have - they have a rough history with the other two clans that I haven't fleshed out very much yet but it pretty much boils down to, a big past war with stormclan that breezeclan chose to support stormclan through. it's been peaceful for a very long time now but it permanently altered the clans' ideas of each other - a little underdeveloped unfortunately I've been focusing on the other two a lot..

there's also a small group of strays (loners) that live near a lake that's just outside clan territories, they contrast how strongly social the clans are. for example, among stray cats it's uncommon for cats to have a dedicated mate (and kittens usually have just one parent), while in the clans the norm is to have a dedicated mate and for kittens to have more than one parent. (another piece of the theme of self reliance vs reliance on others in CO2)

#co2 #h&s #maybe i add more to this later?#working on clan cat myths and thoughts about other wildlife is something i want to work on soon #since the setting is very inspired by the one and only “The area where i live”#the setting is heavily inspired by trails i like to walk at #so far the biggest thing related to that is that the clan cats know about the concept of invasive species and #actively work to remove honeysuckle from their territory #(this will be surprisingly plot relevant)

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effervescentdragon · 2 years ago

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Why Sebastian Vettel and Nico Rosberg are the same person in a different font, an essay by a delusional F1 girlie

I keep saying that I am going to write an essay about how Nico Rosberg and Sebastian Vettel are basically the same person in different fonts and on the opposite ends of the scale one day. Guess what friends, that day has come. Thank you Misa @blorbocedes you absolute fucking bastard for putting so much Seb and Nico content on my dash that I actually opened a fucking google doc so that I can do this properly and write it. Imma count this as preparation for actually having to write proper analyses for my uni classes, so im *technically* not wasting my time on two German twinks id love to fuck at certain points in the life.

Disclaimer: Half of this is bullshit and projections. I’ll let you decide which part, because if you’re reading this, you are definitely at least as delusional as me, who’s actually writing this shit. Dont come to me for references, do your own research. :)

Unto the fucking breach.

The first thing I have to say is they’re both German, but not the same. Nico is half-Finnish, and I would blame that flavour for differing him from say, the way Michael Schumacher and Sebastian Vettel are similar, but on the other fucking hand, the Finnish part in him comes from KEKE FUCKING ROSBERG, so I don’t know how that would actually be true. ANYWAYS.

Nico was born to a WDC insane (affectionate) father and girlboss of a mother in Monaco (in Germany, but was raised in Monaco dont come at me) as their only child. Sebastian Vettel has like, a billion siblings (four, i think, two older sisters and a younger brother) and was also born and raised in Bumfuck NOwhere, Germany (Heppenheim, but who’s counting). So the first thing we have here is them being annoying bastards, but in a different way. Nico had like one friend in his life (Lewis Hamilton, and I aint touching that with a ten foot pole lest I descend into absolute madness), and Sebastian had two older siblings and according to everyone and their mother, he was always the outgoing friendly little shit that we love. So like, we have competing for attention with older siblings vs competing for attention with whatever rich people do in monaco. Do you see where I’m going with this? The only way Nico was forced to learn to share was through his friendship with Lewis, while Seb was probably raised to share everything, so he probably wanted to have things for himself (projecting here as one of the youngest in the group of cousins). Also, Keke chose which languages Nico would learn, considering which ones are good for his racing career. Im pretty sure Seb went to public school. There are differences in their status which i think show themselves pretty nicely as they grow up and become the bitches we love <3 it even shows itself in the way they approach environmental issues today. Nico goes on the stupides, most capitalist dumabss show and only invests into some rich people dumbass “umweltschutz” start-ups which are literally so fucking useless my god, and what Seb does is try to bring renewable fuels and whatnot into F1 and talk about climate change and call people out, while still sometimes saying extremely stupid shit. Nico does think it’s laudable tho xD

ALSO. Very important. They are both Cancers, which is the sign ruled by the moon which means its all about emotions and feelings, but Nico is a June Cancer, and Seb is a July Cancer. If you dont know what that means, lemme give you a quick breakdown, since i am definitely a completely normal person about this. Short answer is - June cancers are otright manipulative sons of bitches; July cancers are crybabies. Which I do believe fits perfectly in how they manipulate girlboss gaslight malewife their way through their careers. Nico never shied away from outright manipulation, speaking openly about the mind games and how it was with Michael (imma come to Michael. Gods do I have THOUGHTS about Michael ugh but we gotta go through some other stuff first), while Seb always, fucking always played the “wide-eyed, he-ran into me, bottom emoji, i didnt see him” card, and batted his eyelashes, and fucking got whatever he wanted. MULTI 21 MY BELOVED. Anyways, imma spare you the talk about decants and shit, but Seb was born early July EXACTLY ON THE BORDER, and Imma let you decide if he is 1st or 2nd option. I know which one im aiming for. SO. JUNE CANCERS/early july, 1st option. They have a strong moon influence in their sun sign, and are the purest form of cancer sun sign and embody the strengths and weaknesses of the sign the most (google that shit for more info), in that they are both highly empathetic and emotional, nurturing, giving off mommy energy, but can also be extremely manipulative, they hide things very well since moon IS the master of deception. 2nd option, 10th-20th degree of cancer, is early July cancers. And their cancer sun is influenced by pluto, and they have scorpio energy to them, which means they are intense, they can be dark, they can be very mysterious and hiding things, obsessive and manipulative, and they bring heavy emotional energy to the table while being extremely empathetic themselves. Basically, they are emotional bitches in the same way but in sorta different fonts. :)

So anyways, you decide for yourselves which one Seb is :)

shout out to bff’s bf for debating cancers with me and explaining astrology to the degree i never thought i’d wanna hear about, but this IS an essay and i DO need sources. So there.

pic credits: @niamh90 and this post

Lets go to racing. Nico’s dad made a bloody team in karting so he and Lewis could continue to race. Seb. Didn’t really have that. Yadda yadda, something about connections vs doing it all yourself on your own merit. Now dont get me wrong, im all for nepotism, and Nico is an insanely good driver in my opinion, and Seb did use BMW ties to get to test for Williams. They both also won some series that im not sure i understand, the fuck is GP2 and German cups, im not looking into that if i dont have to, bottom line is, they are both super good drivers. However, there are all these differences between them and the way they’ve even come into F1 that I think push them to the opposite sides of the spectrum despite them being the same person in their basics. If you want to know more, google their racing careers up until F1 and you’ll see what I mean (i dont feel like re-doing a deep dive about junior series and shit and who won what bcs i will then never be able to forget it and i dont need that info cluttering my brain). Onto the F1.

Nico came into F1 after winning whatever GP2 is, in 2006, driving for Williams (he also refused McLaren in 2007, good on him, fuck McLaren on principle). Seb (properly, not just to replace Kubica) came into F1 in 2007 mid-season, when RBR did a well-known and beloathingly repeated signature move of replacing drivers mid-season and he drove for Toro Rosso aka Baby Bull Team. He also fucking crashed into Mark Webber in 2007, thats not relevant to anything except that I personally think it’s hilarious, so honorable mention for Seb doing terrorism on Webber even before they were teammates. :) Anyways, Seb wins Monza 2008, Williams is shit. Whatever. All of that is secondary, because we now come to the biggest point of contention, the ultimate important thing, the gem of the collection, the one and only and the most important person in this essay (dont @ me idgaf you know it’s true) - MICHAEL FUCKING SCHUMACHER.

Michael Fucking Schumacher. Sebastian Vettel’s absolute ultimate idol since he was a kid (three M’s, anyone) and Nico Rosberg’s teammate in the newly minted Mercedes Team in 2010, after his switch from Williams. Look at that face. I’d let him terrorize me ngl. He is adorable.

He is also absolutely unhinged, and Sebastian fucking adores him.

Basically, what we have in 2010 F1 season is Sebastian Vettel terrorizing his older teammate Mark Webber with his presence and results in Red Bull, and Michael Schumacher terrorizing his younger teammate Nico Rosberg in Mercedes after his sabbatical. Schumi was there to fuck around, and boy did Nico find out. On the other hand, Michael took one look at German twinks available on the grid, Seb smiled at him and batted his eyelashes in hero-worship whilst being a little shit, and Michael went “yeah okey I like this one, fuck the rest”, and he took on a friend-mentor-whatever you want to call it i dont judge role with Vettel while absolutely mindfucking Nico. If you look at any press conference ever where Seb, Michael and Nico are there, Nico is always their bullying target. If you add Webber, you get double the terrorism. Michael looks on as Seb says/does stupid shit and then turns around with the biggest “did i do weel senpai? Did you see? Did you?” fucking heart eyes ever. Meanwhile poor Nico has to deal with a 7 time wdc in the garage and with mind games constantly, which Michael is probably teaching Seb on the downlow, or just by, yakno. Diffusion principles or sth. I’d almost feel sorry for Webber, but I hate that guy. Here’s pics of these lovely teammate pairings, bcs why not.

Do you see what I mean? :) (merc pic credit goes to @smoothoperator-55 and this post)

I mean, Nico tries. He really does, and he actually succeeded in his mindfuckery with Lewis later, on account of knowing him better than anyone in the world, really. But during the RBR golden era of Vettel championships, he has no chance. Literally none. As annoying as he can be, he is literally just being bullied by these two insane Germans. And I love it.

(again, pic credit to this post)

Wait, I lost the plot being distracted about Seb and Schumi being the mean girls of the grid. I mean look at them. Fuck. Where was I?

Oh yeah okay. So. What happens is, Seb is on top of the world, having the friendship and love and support of his idol. Nico isn’t. Niki sees this, he steps in. Michael retires. Nico’s best friend, a kid more talented than anyone in the world and a WDC with McLaren already comes into the team. FUN TIMES ABOUT TO COMMENCE. Kinda. Not really. I won’t go into the details of all that, bcs chances are, if you’re reading this, you fucking know already. Lewis and Sebs friendship developing especially after Nico left, Seb at Ferrari fuckery while Nico was gathering the pieces of his broken heart and doing commentating, Seb using any and every opportunity to fuck with Nico by being all touch with Lewis and then still defending Nico after all; all of that, you probably know better than I do. I will, however, draw some more parallels bcs this is almost 2k already and I need to eat.

- Seb said Kimi was his only friend on the grid when he started; we know Nico’s only friend in racing was Lewis;

- Both Nico and Seb married their high-school sweethearts and both are paragons of integrity in this (me being convinced that brocedes and princess cake and Seb/everyone he made eyes at are canon should not be counted as facts here);

- They are both so fucking annoying in interviews. Like any interview you watch, they are so fucking annoying, and when they’re with each other, they are even worse;

- they both played mind-games extraordinaire with their teammates and managed to beat them on account of those (tho id argue Webber sucks tbh but i do hate that guy);

- they are both passionate about the same cause - environmentalism, but in diametrically opposed ways. While Nico does DHDL and drives around and invests in electric cars, Seb, with no media presence, wears those oversized t-shirts of his and rides fucking vans to european circuits;

- they have both definitely banged at least one of their teammates;

- they are both rich white men with some concerningly western-biased opinions but whatever, we stan anyways (whilst being critical of that in rl if not on our delusional tumblrs).

I may add some more stuff if I remember it, and I may even research it properly next time, but for now I think this is enough. I don’t even know what this is, except me word-vomiting about my favorite German twinks to distract myself from obligations and giving myself an excuse to search for pretty pictures.

Here’s Seb and Nico, so we end this with a high. I know I get a high from them. Akira out.

some sources, bcs im not an absolute heathen, also all the pic credits i didnt tag specifically go to pinterest:

x x x x x

#akira goes insane #f1 #nico rosberg #sebastian vettel #dont ask me about it i wrote the bloody essay and i am dead #michael schumacher #bcs i think he deserves the honorable mention here #two sides of a same coin or something #cw astrology taken seriously #unhinged f1 content #akira writes too long essays

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yong-bokk · 3 years ago

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all in ¹

pairing: special agent ! han jisung x reader

genre: frenemies to idiots to lovers fluff with a dash of sad

warnings: mentions of drug dealing and someone got shot

u are !! angry !!

scratch that

u are ヽ(｀⌒´メ)ノFURIOUS!!! ヽ(｀⌒´メ)ノ

ur pen magically disappeared from your pen holder. AGAIN

and this time it’s the new carrot-shaped one you just bought

٩( •̀ㅇ•́ )۶ ٩( •̀ㅇ•́ )۶ ٩( •̀ㅇ•́ )۶

u don’t need to be a detective to figure out the culprit behind this

bc it’s who else other than,,,,

“HAN JISUNG”

hyunjin, putting on his earphones: “here we go again”

“yes, love?”

GOD u wish u could wipe that cute stupid smile off his cute face

“STOP. STEALING. MY PENS.”

(○｀д´)ﾉｼ Σ(っﾟДﾟ)っ

u’re going to sue chan

why chan, u ask

bc “bickering with han jisung daily” was definitely not part of the contract he gave u when u decided to join the skz criminal investigation division

but here u are

shooting glares at the special agent sitting at his table across yours, filling in paperwork with your carrot pen

and that’s just how everyday is

he teases you all the time and takes ur things

you take revenge by stealing from his ‘secret’ lollipop stash

“STOP. STEALING. MY CANDIES.”

you, popping one into your mouth: “i literally don’t know what you’re talking about, love”

(ง •̀_•́)ง “u come near my babies again and i’ll FIGHT u”

he says that

but jisung always buys more of your favourite flavour

he'd rather quit than admit that to you though !!

the two of you bicker 24/7

and everyone else just wants you two to shut up and kiss

i mean

it’s not like u two hated each other or anything

hate is a strong word

and deep down the two of u know it’s all just friendly banter

and u know this because

there was this one time

u had to stay up late to catch up on the biggest pile of paperwork u’ve been procrastinating on

at god-knows-what-o’clock u decided to rest ur eyes

just close them for a couple of minutes,, right? (◍ᐡᐤᐡ◍)

wrong!

u ended up closing them for a good HOUR before waking up and realising that u

one: did NOT finish the pile of work u promised chan u’d hand him that day

and two: overslept and is most definitely very, very late to a very important meeting

u wanted to cry but fuck u didn’t even have the TIME to cry

just when u thought ur day couldn’t get worse

it suddenly rained hard when u were just 5 minutes away from the office

( ◞‸◟)

sorry reader

that day was just /not/ ur day

u stepped into the office shivering like one of minho’s kittens after a bath, drenched from head to toe and creating mini puddles wherever u stand

u barely sat down when jisung threw something at u

honestly u were about to yell at him but then u saw

?????

he threw u his hoodie

and sweatpants

and also the warmest towel

and u just sat there staring at him bc ur last half of a braincell was: surprised

“hurry up and go change before u catch a cold, dummy”

u would’ve smacked him for calling u a dummy on any other day

but u made ur way to the restroom and changed

jisung’s hoodie felt way better than the soaked dress shirt you had on

it he smelled nice too

u’ll never know how chaotic his heart became when he saw u waddle back to ur desk looking like the absolute love of his life in his clothes

han jisung on the outside: ₍ᐢ._.ᐢ₎

han jisung on the inside: ⁄(⁄ ⁄>⁄ ㅅ⁄<⁄ ⁄)⁄ AKJSDFSDFASKDJ

u also don’t know this but han went to chan that day and asked him to let u off the hook for being late that day

he also asked for half of your paperwork

but this one u found out

bc u bumped into him walking towards chan’s office holding a stack of paper with a bright yellow post-it on top of it

and your name written on said post-it

“is that,,, my paperwork?”

…………

“,,,,no?”

“han jisung”

“alrightyeahmaybe…..”

“u-u did my paperwork for me?” (˃̣̣̥^˂̣̣̥`)

“don’t think too much of it, i was uh- i was just bored WAIT WHY ARE U CRYINGKSJDF”

that was a one-time thing

but yeah u definitely don’t hate jisung

and u’re pretty sure he doesn’t hate u too

even if u purposefully annoy each other on a daily basis

“i hate paperwork”

“yn if u say that one more fucking time i SWEAR-”

“u’ll do it for me?” (◕ᴗ◕`)

“U WISH”

:(((((

hyunjin: “okay shut up lovebirds. i have good news and bad news, which one do u want to hear first”

“good….?”

“good news !! you don’t have to do paperwork”

＾ワ＾) “and why is that?”

“bang chan is assigning u on another undercover case”

“that’s not bad news hyun-“

“-with jisung”

＾ワ＾) ?????!?!???!?!?!WHAT

u physically can’t even be together with jisung for longer than 2,5 seconds without start bickering with each other

what does he MEAN chan is assigning u two on an undercover case

“which part of ‘i’m assigning u and jisung on an undercover case’ do u not get”

“IT’S LIKE U DON’T EVEN KNOW US CHAN”

“listen . it’s a one-shot mission and i’m sure the two of u won’t fuck up. me assigning two of my best agents for this case is a well-thought decision”

( ´•︵•` )

ok so the case

a new club recently opened in town

and it’s currently the most popular one bc the owner is a very famous millionaire and has his famous guests over all of the time

however

there has been a couple of reports asking the officials to check for some suspicious activities going on inside

the reports seemed valid considering how details from different sources matched with each other

but the police can’t just barge in and do a thorough check

bc the one who owns the club is kind of a big deal

so ;—;

u and jisung

dressed up in the prettiest fanciest celebrity-like fits u own

in u go

it didn’t take the two of u long before u gathered up information

all u had to do now is catch them in the act and get rock solid evidence

it was supposed to be a simple fishy drug trade in a very fancy club’s private bathroom

from one of the stalls u got clear view of everything happening

but u weren’t paying attention

one second u were done sending the pictures to hyunjin

the next second u heard jisung yell ur name and suddenly someone’s on the ground ( ｡ _ ｡ )

turns out that someone barged in, attempting to shoot u but jisung got to him first

but they both didn’t miss

jisung took a bullet to his shoulder instead of u

from then on

ur body autopiloted and everything else was a blur

u helped him apply pressure on the wound as u requested help

guilt swallowed u whole when u saw him wince a little bc he thought u weren’t looking :((

the ambulance came and chan and hyunjin followed not long after

u just let them move jisung onto the stretcher and followed silently, not letting go of his hand

:(( jisung thinks seeing u like this hurts more than his wound does

“it’s okay, i’m okay. it’s not ur fault, yn”

he gave u a smile and squeezed ur hand but u know he’s just saying that bc he doesn’t want u to feel bad and worry

if it weren’t for bang chan asking u to stay for a couple of statements,

u would’ve gotten into the ambulance with jisung

(๑•́ ᎔ ก̀๑)

but u went to the hospital right after

u waited outside during the surgery and u saw him for a little while when he was still asleep

u haven’t seen him again since then

the next few days jisung was in the hospital, everything felt so… empty

the office felt so empty without jisung

u didn’t even know why u kept staring at his table

it wasn’t like he was going to pop out of nowhere

but (´•̥ ᵔ •̥`) u wish he would

hyunjin followed u everywhere and made sure to drag u away from paperwork for breaks and lunch

felix made u ur favourite batch of cookies in hopes u’ll cheer up

lee know even came in with two bags full of ur favourite snacks

“he’s not dead, yn”

but u know he was worried too

the office was just so gloomy without jisung

u can’t believe u’re saying this but u miss him

u miss bickering with him

u miss his stupid laugh when u yell out his name

u’d even let him steal all ur good pens if it means he’s going to be okay and come back

by the end of the week, chan finally had enough

“yn u know u can’t keep doing this to urself”

“do what”

“come on, if there was one thing u hate the most it’s paperworks and u've been throwing urself into that without a single complaint.. it’s honestly quite concerning”

･o･ “u… called me in bc i wasn’t complaining about paperworks?”

“we both know why u’re here >: and i’m not talking to u as ur chief, i’m talking to u as a friend >: ”

……..

“i just miss him so much…. and it’s my fault, chan, it’s my fault he got hurt like that and he kept saying that he’s okay but-“

u felt bad for bursting out to chan like that but he was the one who cornered u first so >:

u walked out of chan’s office eyes puffy and although the others probably heard, u still hoped they don’t see u like this

u were about to dash for the restroom and hide there until ur eyes de-puff but

“i didn’t know u’d miss me this much”

???

?!@#$*(!@#$)!&@#%

u whipped ur head so fast and there han jisung was wearing his cute stupid smile

normally u would’ve thought of a snarky comeback already

but seeing him there right in front of u after a whole jisungless week

and after ur little breakdown session with chan

u couldn’t help but burst into tears again and hugged him like he was going to disappear if u didn’t hold him tight enough ˚‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º·˚

jisung bit his lip to hold back a wince but couldn’t help and let out a little hiss when u bumped into the bandage on his shoulder

“i-i’m sorry”

u pulled away a little feeling bad for hurting him but he had u in his arms once again, holding u just as tight

“i’m perfectly fine, see? i’m not going anywhere, u can’t get rid of me that fast”

(´ •̥◡•̥ `) jisung smiled so wide when he heard ur tiny giggle

his babey ! no longer sad !

god knows how long the two of u stayed there hugging

until u heard someone clear their throat

that someone being chan

“i’m sorry but can u hug somewhere else, i really need to go”

bonus:

“wait u’re already discharged from the hospital?” (• . • ?)

“i heard u missed me and i can’t let my baby miss me any longer”

“han jisung-“

“i mean, i can’t say i didn’t miss u too-“

“U STILL HAVE UR HOSPITAL BRACELET ON U DID U RUN AWAY?????!!!!”

“……..i? discharged? myself?”

hhhHHHHhhhhh

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anxious2dsimp · 4 years ago

Text

Everything He's Not | Iwaizumi x GN! Reader | Short Fic

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾｡･:*:･ﾟ★｡*✧･ﾟ:˚۰˚☽˚｡･:

Flavour: Angst (Reader x Cheater!Oikawa) to Fluff (Reader x Iwaizumi)💔→☁️

Reader: Gender Neutral!

Format: Short Fic (alternating between two sides of the story, y/n and Iwa's)

Part: 1 out of 2 (read part 2 here)

Word Count: 2.3k

Summary: Y/N, has dated the very popular Oikawa Toru for a while, through him becoming friends with his group. However, little do they know about a certain stoic ace's feelings for his best friend's s/o. When Oikawa screws up big time, will Iwaizumi's true feelings finally show? And what will Y/N do when everything goes down?

Warnings: Cheating, cursing, breakups, basically Oikawa x Reader angst turned into Iwaizumi x Reader fluff.

A/N: I wrote this for myself a while back but I edited it into a gender-neutral reader insert on a sleep-deprived whim (sorry if there are any mistakes, feel free to let me know!) Ik it's very random, but hopefully someone likes it :)

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾｡･:*:･ﾟ★｡*✧･ﾟ:˚۰˚☽˚｡･:

Your POV

Dating Oikawa Toru was definitely different from what you expected; at first you were weary about the volleyball star, but after giving him a chance you started to see the real him. Yes, he was the captain of a powerhouse’s Volleyball team and had a ton of fangirls, but really he was just a regular guy with dorky interests and an alien obsession, which was the side of him you fell for. It wasn’t all great, dealing with his fangirls was rough; luckily you were safe being from another school, but they’d take any chance they had to try and gain Oikawa’s interest, flirting with him as he did the same back, not with bad intentions, it was just his personality. It did slightly annoy you, but you knew he was clear that we were together and wouldn’t take things further, he was just keeping up his image, and he promised you that was all.

Since your Karasuno friends didn’t particularly like your relationship with the setter (though they did respect it), you two hung out with his Aoba Johsai friends; that’s how your friendship with Iwa, Makki, and Mattsun started. You all became good friends, so they all helped you keep Oikawa in line while at school (especially Iwaizumi). Since you got along so well your friendship became its own thing besides Oikawa, and before you realized it, you and Iwa were such good friends that you chatted almost daily on the phone.

You don’t know what exactly made you bond so much, maybe you were similar in the sense that you were both used to being lowkey, keeping things together behind the scenes; regardless, you both enjoyed each other’s company. That Tuesday afternoon was one of those days, Oikawa had something to do at school, so Iwaizumi invited you, Makki, and Mattsun over to his place to wait for the captain like you usually did since it was the closest to the school.

So, you just chilled like always, laughing and playing video games, talking about whatever came to mind. While you were in the middle of a Mario Kart match, you heard the front door of the apartment open, “(y/n)-chan! I’m sorry for the delay~” the brunette said in a sing-song voice.

“Hi to you too, Oikawa,” said Makki, poking fun at him, to which he just rolled his eyes and walked over to the couch. “Aren’t you gonna give me a kiss?” Oikawa asked standing in front of the screen, causing all four of you to start yelling at him to get out of the way, making him pout. “One sec, Toru-chan,” you said, biting your lip while focusing on keeping your first place intact for the last lap. The setter just giggled and got out of the way, walking around the sofa to stand behind you.

Iwaizumi’s POV

‘Eyes on the screen Iwaizumi,’ the ace told himself as he tried to focus on the game, attempting to ignore the way Oikawa kissed (y/n)’s neck while they played, trying to get their attention but failing miserably other than a giggle here and there. Iwa could tell by the way their (e/c) colored eyes pierced the screen that they wanted to win. The boy could see why his best friend liked them, unlike most people (y/n) actually treated Oikawa like a normal person, which definitely got him going. It wasn’t just that though, you all became such good friends because they’re smart, funny and beyond kind; but that’s all you were, friends. So why did it make him moody to see them be all couple-y?

After all, they were together while he was just the friend, the one who kept the fangirls off Oikawa so (y/n) didn’t have to worry because he couldn’t do it himself. Even though Toru was Iwaizumi’s best friend since they were kids, he couldn’t help but think that his friend wasn’t the greatest boyfriend. However, that was the same reason why he couldn’t say anything either, after all, they made him happy and vice versa, so he just kept telling himself to keep his damn eyes on the screen.

Luckily for him, the game was soon over so you all ordered takeout and sat around talking. “Yo, (y/n), there’s this new scary movie on Netflix, we should watch it this Friday night,” Mattsun stated, stealing one of Maki’s fries and throwing it in his mouth. “That sounds fun, but I can’t Friday! Karasuno has a friendly match against a few Tokyo schools this weekend so we leave Thursday after school,” (y/n) explained with a sweet smile, Iwaizumi’s eyes casually wondering over to Oikawa to see him looking upset.

‘Ugh, here goes,’ the spiker thought to himself. Lately, Toru had been restless and uncomfortable because according to him, his s/o was slipping away from him. Oikawa had somehow managed to convince himself that Karasuno had made it their mission to get their manager (y/n) to stop liking him and had been getting increasingly dramatic and jealous lately for no reason.

“But I thought we were going to hang out this weekend,” Oikawa whined as he pouted at his significant other, trying to seem jokingly disappointed though his best friend could tell he actually was upset. “Babe, we literally talk every day and we hung out all this past weekend, and today,” (y/n) said taking his hand.

“Plus, you have friends too, Shittykawa,” Hajime said, trying to get his friend’s mind out of that dark place since he knew he was more prone to make stupid comments when it was there. Oikawa didn’t drop it, insisting on how they were talking less as (y/n) continued to explain that school had been busy and how he also had responsibilities that took up his time. They eventually got him to shut up, but Iwaizumi couldn’t shake the concern that he was being too stupid, and it felt like he was getting closer and closer to making a mistake.

Your POV

You had to admit you did feel guilty when you told Toru you were leaving for the weekend, it was true that you had been way too busy with school and that neither of you had much free time, but you knew that your feelings for him were still strong. So, that Thursday after school you were happy and excited to hear that the trip had been postponed and you’d actually travel on Saturday morning because Sensei had a very important meeting on Friday afternoon. With the change of plans, you decided to go surprise your boyfriend, and it already being late in the afternoon, by the time you got to his place he would be home.

As you got off the bus by his place and got closer to his house, the sun beginning to set, a couple by a small park caught your eye, causing a soft smile to appear on your face. That park was always where you two would hang out when you wanted to be just the two of you. Walking closer, however, the smile quickly disappeared as you realized the “couple” was none other than Oikawa himself with one of his persistent fans he told you not to worry about. ‘Maybe they’re just hanging out as friends,’ or at least that’s what you told yourself as you squinted and kept walking.

Picking up your pace you got closer, now being able to see their faces more clearly in the dimly lit park only to watch them kiss, the girl’s arms around his neck while Oikawa’s hand slid up her thigh. You didn’t know what to do, so you just stood there in shock as silent tears began to fall down your face. Almost as if you were in a trance, you reached into your pocket and took out your phone, dialing his number as you saw the brunette react.

He looked down surprised at his phone screen as he scooted apart from the girl and picked up the call as if it was nothing. “Hey beaut-” he started to say before you cut him off, not having the strength to hear his happy tone. “How could you?!” you sobbed angrily into the phone as his face became anxious. “What’s wrong babe?” How could he try to play it off as if he had no idea?

“You lying, cheating, son of a bitch! We’re over,” you yelled angrily, hanging up right as his eyes met yours. You were close enough to see the horrified and heartbroken expression on his face, but before he could say anything you turned around and just ran. Grabbing the straps of your backpack you sprinted back down the streets, your vision blurry with tears as your (h/c) hair was pushed back by the wind. It was only when you were back at the bus station and were sure that Oikawa was nowhere to be seen that you stopped and realized; you didn’t know where to go next.

You could go to your Karasuno friends, but you weren’t in the mood to hear “I told you so” and couldn’t go home to not worry your family. As you sat there and looked at the screen blankly, tears continuing to fill your eyes, a notification appeared. ‘Hey loser, how’s the trip going?’ you read as your eyes looked at Iwa’s name by the message. He was your best shot, you were close and he wouldn’t judge, so without opening your phone again and ignoring all of Oikawa’s calls you jogged over to Iwaizumi’s place.

After ringing the apartment and hiding your teary and now out of breath voice in the intercom, Iwa’s mom buzzed you in, and once you got to his floor you were greeted by Iwaizumi looking concerned, more so once he saw the state you were in. “(y/n), are you ok?” Iwaizumi asked as he walked over to you, hugging you as you hid in his arms and sobbed. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know where else to go. It’s Oikawa,” you explained as he nodded and got you inside. He made some tea and brought it with you two to his room, both of you sitting on his bed. “Ok, what did Shittykawa do now?” he asked as he looked up at you and handed over a warm mug. “D- did you know h-he was cheating on me?” you managed to stutter out between sobs, trying to sound collected but being embarrassed by your inability to do so.

“He- wHAT?!” His reaction startled you, and when you looked up from the cup and saw his horrified, furious expression it made you feel less like you were overreacting. “I- the trip got postponed to Saturday morning, so I went to surprise him to his place and saw him in our bench making out with one of his fangirls,” you explained, watching as Iwa’s face became angrier and angrier, realizing how you don’t think you’ve ever seen him like this, “I’m sorry I came to you, I know you’re best friends.”

Iwaizumi’s POV

Seeing them like this was already painful, but learning what Oikawa did was too much, Iwaizumi couldn’t believe how his friend could do this to (y/n). The spiker had never cared when he did stuff like this or worse than this to his fangirls. After all, he thought, they were the ones stupid enough to be blinded by his charm, but he never fathomed Oikawa would be able to do something like that to someone as great as you. “What? Hey, don’t even dare apologize,” he stated firmly as he took both mugs and set them by the bedside table, hugging (y/n) tightly and feeling them snuggle into him as they cried. Seeing them like this killed him. ‘Fuck Oikawa,’ he thought to himself, ‘if before I had stayed out of the way because they were good for each other that’s no longer the case.’

“I’m so sorry he did this to you; I should have stopped him. If I had known I would have, I should have been paying more attention,” the ace rambled into (y/n)’s hair as they cried softly, getting angry at himself before being interrupted by them pushing themselves away from him gently to look up at his face. “Why are you apologizing as if this was your fault? Iwa, he’s the one who’s an asshole, not you,” they stated, wiping a tear from their face.

“Because,” was he really going to say this? Screw it, here goes nothing, he told himself before continuing, “I knew you deserved better than him, but I convinced myself he would be different with you because I saw how good you were to him, and how happy you looked.” (y/n) just looked at him, mouth slightly ajar as they seemed to process what the boy had said. He couldn’t take the silence anymore so to avoid the blush he felt was beginning to appear on his cheeks he asked; “so did you dump him?” They nodded, looking down at their cup of tea as they chuckled and replied; “on the spot, over the phone.”

Iwaizumi chuckled back, releasing some of the nerves; “serves him right.” They smiled weakly at his comment and absentmindedly ran their fingers through their hair, My god were they gorgeous, Hajime thought to himself, only then realizing it was the first time it was just the two of them in his room, suddenly becoming self-conscious. Calm down, he told himself while taking a deep breath, looking over at (y/n). 'They just broke up with their boyfriend, being here with you is their last concern,' or so he thought. “Do you… want to watch (favorite movie) and eat ice cream?” the spiker suggested after thinking for a moment, he knew that was their favorite movie, and ice cream helps get over jerks, right?

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#Cassie likes HQ!#iwaizumi x reader #iwaizumi fanfic #iwaizumi fluff #iwaizumi hajime x reader #iwaizumi x gender neutral reader #oikawa angst #oikawa toru x reader #iwaizumi hajime fic #iwaizumi fic #iwaizumi x you

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snackhobi · 4 years ago

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prompt: “Is that my shirt you’re wearing?”

thank you to my darling @yeojaa for sending this in and thank you to my darling @hobi-gif for beta reading it for me, you are both such lovely stars in the night sky of my life xoxo

pairing: seokjin x reader / word count: 1.9k / genre: fluff (sfw/general) / warnings: none!

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single woman in possession of a hot roommate, must want to jump his bones.

Like. C’mon. Kim Seokjin is nothing if not easy on the eyes. It’s not enough that he has the body proportions of a god—broad shoulders, lovely thighs, everything in its place and perfectly in line with his height and his poise—he has a beautiful face, too. Those lips. That jaw. Those eyes. You don’t want to wax lyrical but it really is like God decided to take his time making Kim Seokjin and everyone else (like you) was just left with the dregs; the stuff that wasn’t good enough for Jin and was thrown aside.

The worst thing, though. The worst thing. The absolute worst thing about Kim Seokjin is that he is A Nice Person.

You’d barely known each other, only a month into your cohabitation when he’d come across you crying into a tub of ice cream in the kitchen, sobbing over the guy who’d finally grown bored of stringing you along with promises of eventually becoming your actual boyfriend and had just cut you off altogether after one final lay. You were utterly heartbroken and entirely mortified when you noticed Jin standing in the kitchen doorway as you clumsily tried to dig your spoon into the still-hard vanilla, but he’d just slid down onto the floor next to you with a spoon in one hand as the other came to rest on your shoulder. He’d listened to you snivel and sniffle, quietly eating the weirdly chemical-flavoured chocolate ice cream in the own-brand Neapolitan tub you favoured—your least favourite and the one you always left till last.

Once a guy’s seen you crying your eyes out on the kitchen floor in old pyjamas, and you’ve seen him eat five pots of super hot instant noodles on the trot and chase the whole thing down with an entire box of doughnuts, you sort of get to know each other as people—both things are revealing in different ways—and it’s hard for that to not lead to friendship.

You could have dealt with Jin if he was just hot. But he’s hot and nice and funny, utterly ridiculous; he doesn’t take himself seriously while also knowing how to rein himself in when necessary to not overwhelm people and basically you’ve been crushing on him in a major, major way for a while now.

And like. Seokjin is single, so technically you have a chance. But you also have absolutely no chance at all, because? Hello? Kim Seokjin? You? You? Kim Seokjin? He’s so far out of your league he may as well be in another galaxy. And he’s also probably the best roommate you’ve ever had (cleans up after himself, doesn’t microwave fish and stink up the place, likes the same TV shows as you so there are no arguments over the remote), so you’re not about to throw a wrench into the mix by doing something stupid like confessing that you like him.

“Right, I should be back around ten,” says Seokjin. He’s all dressed up for a noraebang night with his friends—well, not dressed up really, they’re just gonna get drunk while wailing songs at the top of their lungs in a small room so it’s not like he has to go all out, but Seokjin makes everything look good. “Are you sure you don’t want to come?”

Seokjin is nice and hot and funny and friendly. Honestly, he’s just a dreamboat of a roommate and a man, with great friends too. Normally you would have leaped at the chance to spend a night out with Seokjin and the other guys, but you’d spilled your drink on Yoongi last time and were still convinced that he was plotting your imminent demise. Even if Seokjin insists otherwise, you want to give Yoongi a wide berth for a little while longer in the hopes he’ll suddenly suffer a bout of amnesia and forget that you spilled a very boozy and sticky Oreo and Baileys cocktail(/glorified milkshake) on him and ruined his shoes.

“I’m good,” you say. “But make sure you don’t have any fun without me and you have to let everyone know that it’s because I’m not there.”

Jin laughs, a wet squeegee of a sound, and it goes straight to your heart. “I’ll pass on the message,” he promises, blowing you a tiny kiss as he goes.

(Ugh, he’s so cute. You hate him.) (No, you don’t.)

You seem to be setting a trend for yourself in the drink-spilling department, though. During an ad break you decide to get yourself a drink, and even though it’s just a Boys Over Flowers rerun that you’ve seen multiple times, you rush as you pour yourself a glass of orange juice—you don’t want to take too long and miss anything. Suffice to say you Fuck Up and end up with a shirt and trousers covered in juice and pulp and you miss a bunch of the episode as you clean it up, huffing dramatically to yourself the whole time, before scarpering towards your bedroom for some new clothes.

At least, that’s the plan. You pass by Seokjin’s open door and pause, taking in the sight of a few discarded bits of clothing on his bed and across the back of his chair, things he’d clearly decided weren’t worth wearing out tonight. The one that’s caught your eye is the vibrant pink shirt strewn over his duvet, one of your favourites, one you haven’t seen him wear in a while. It’s one of your favourites because he just looks so cosy in it—Jin ends up with a lot of oversized clothes so they can fit over his shoulders, but he practically swims in material when he wears this shirt, flapping the sleeves at you and then laughing at his own antics. He could wear it as a dress if he wanted to, probably.

… so could you, if you wanted to, probably.

… but you shouldn’t. Like, that’s weird. Jin is your roommate and even if he’s made it clear that he has an open door policy, going in through said open door to get a bit of his clothing is weird. Definitely creepy.

But… you’ve already kicked off your dirtied outfit and you’re just in your underwear so you can’t be blamed for being worried if you’re going to get cold, right? You’re just grabbing the closest bit of clothing, aren’t you?

… You’ll take it off before he gets back and put it in the laundry with everything else; he won’t notice. You’ll just take this awful awful secret to the grave and never tell anyone about your invasive actions.

Oh, man, the shirt smells so good. You share the same laundry detergent but Jin had clearly tried this on before discarding it, the scent of his cologne lingering in the air as you end up swamped in the shirt (/shirt dress), and you don’t regret this. Well, you do, but also you don’t. It’s like being wrapped up in Jin’s arms. Jin’s not shy about giving you hugs but there’s something altogether different about wearing someone’s clothes.

You end up curled up on the sofa as you watch more Boys Over Flowers, knees to your chest and revelling in how cosy and small Jin’s massive shirt makes you feel. You have to hitch the material up so that your hands peep out the ends of the sleeves. Sweater paws are cute on everyone, even yourself, and you giggle as you fumble for the remote so that you can check how many more episodes there are before it turns to something else. You can indulge yourself for a bit. As a treat.

“Unbelievable, I can’t believe Minji did that,” you mutter, so caught up in the drama of it all (as if you haven’t seen this episode four times) that you don’t hear the key turning in the lock, nor do you hear the footsteps that are heading towards you—what you do hear, however, is the sudden sound of Seokjin’s voice, freezing like a rabbit caught in headlights when you do.

“I forgot my wallet,” he says. “I—”

And that’s how he catches you, wide-eyed as you stare back at him, wishing that you could bury yourself between the sofa pillows so that he can’t see you. His keys are still in his hand and his mouth is open around an unfinished word as he takes the sight of you in, scrunched up against the armrest in some ridiculous attempt to shrink yourself small enough that he would have missed you.

He stares. You stare. You both stare. And then—

“Is that my shirt you’re wearing?”

“No!” A high-pitched shrill of an obvious lie. “No, uh, nope. Nuh-uh. Haha, oh, Jin, always such a jokester, you.”

You want the sofa to suddenly develop sentience and swallow you whole, just so you can be out of this situation. So you wouldn’t have to watch as a smile starts to spread over Jin’s face, the way there’s a little glint in his eyes, the way he opens his mouth and says—

“You know, you didn’t have to turn down noraebang just so you could wear my clothes. You just had to ask, I would have said yes.” He doesn’t seem creeped out, just amused, which is—well, it’s better, but, what? He’s laughing at you? You don’t know if that’s worse, somehow, actually.

“I didn’t! I spilled orange juice on my shirt and then I saw this shirt and you weren’t home—”

“Aha, so you admit it, it’s not your shirt,” Jin proclaims. He looks smug.

“Oh my God, I am full of regret,” you groan. “My life is a disaster. Can we pretend this never happened? I will pay you literal money. Please.”

At this, Jin’s eyes turn soft. “Do you really want that?”

“I—wuh? Do I really want us both to pretend you didn’t walk in on me wearing your shirt like some weird stalker or something? Absolutely. Yes. Let’s do that.”

“I wasn’t joking about letting you wear my clothes,” he says. There’s a note to his voice, something a little doughy, yielding and warm for you, and—you know what your gut is screaming at you, but— “I always thought you’d look cute in them, and I was right.”

You splutter. Jin thought you’d look cute—he’s been thinking about you wearing his clothes—the sort of thing that, you know, couples do. But this is Kim Seokjin you’re talking about. There’s no way he’s attracted to you in the way you’re attracted to him.

… but he is looking at you in a way that’s soft and tender, the same look you give him when you think he isn’t looking.

“Jin,” you say, slow. “Are you…”

“The most handsome man alive? Yes, I am.”

You make a face at his interruption and he laughs at your expression before going quiet, eyes so big and lovely and warm as he smiles at you, and you continue to speak. “Are you saying you want to, y’know. See me wearing more of your clothes? Or, uh... Less clothes in general?”

You can feel the blood rising in your cheeks as you say this, and you can see the red that starts to tinge the top of Jin’s ears, exquisite and wonderful. “I’m saying that I’m happy to give you what’s mine, including my clothes,” he says. “And my time. And love.”

You end up pulling the excess material of the shirt over your head as you turn into some sort of bright pink turtle, overwhelmed and in disbelief but so happy.

Judging from Jin’s laughter and the warmth of his hands reaching for yours in their too-long sleeves, he is, too.

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ishouldreallybeelsewhere · 3 years ago

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I Don’t Dance; An Analysis

By someone with no idea what they’re doing

Can I just say,,, this song slaps. Like, ignore everything,, all the connections, all the subtext, all the whatever, this song (I Don’t Dance from High School Musical 2) is just rlly good. I’ve been listening to it a lot (shocker) and I have to say, perhaps pop isn’t so bad. I’m lying, of course, rock forever, but also not the point. Now, onto what I was actually planning on talking about.

Songs can say a lot, especially when paired with dances, and to see the full meaning of a song, one must look past it’s surface level meaning and dive deep into the subtext. Contextually, the song makes sense as just talking about baseball, but on a surface level only. Look into it for even a moment and you’re sure to find all the queer subtext you need to confirm the theory that High School Musical as a whole is a metaphor for accepting your queer identity.

A quick overview of the song; it starts as a friendly game of baseball between Ryan and Chad, the dancer and the jock. That’s fairly straight-forward, and as they play, Ryan encourages Chad to dance, insisting that he can and should, while dancing in ways that enhance his own playing. I should mention right now, I know fuck-all about baseball. I learnt to spell it, like, 15 minutes ago. It should not be spelt like that. Regardless, I’m gonna do my best to some-what grasp/avoid the thing entirely. Anyway, I’m getting off track. Back to what I was saying, the song is Ryan encouraging Chad to dance, in a somewhat flirtatious matter. The song ends after a dance routine involving the entirety of both teams, and then, in the following scene, Chad and Ryan are shown having a good time, talking and laughing while eating lunch, WEARING EACH OTHER’S CLOTHES!! If someone can give me a heterosexual explanation for that,,,, don’t.

Now, for what I’ve been meaning to get to; what does the song actually mean? (I use the phrase ‘Now,’ at the start of a lot of sentences, sorry in advance.)

Obviously, it’s about accepting your queer identity and living your life to its fullest, not allowing the heteronoramilty of the world hold you back. Anyone who’s ever watched the movie can tell you that, however, as is the way with any piece of explanatory writing, I have to assume that you’ve never even seen any of the movies (heathen).

The plot doesn’t matter. I don’t care about all but four characters, Zeke, Sharpay, Chad, and Ryan. This will primarily be about the latter two, and their own acceptance of who they are.

From the start, Ryan is flamboyant and feminine, the archetype of a gay man, as ‘subtlety’ isn’t really a thing in High School Musical. Less so in the sequel, aside from the sub-text of course, but they had to get that past Disney’s censors. Also, Ryan is one of the ‘villains’ of the trilogy, meaning that he can be queer-coded as much as the writers desire. Off track once again. I apologise. No I don’t. Anyway, Ryan is a theatre kid. The theatre kid, excluding his sister, of course, but as I said previously, Sharpay is not the topic of today’s discussion. Why is theatre so important you ask? Well, not only is the whole point of the trilogy theatre and musicals, but it’s often associated with queer identity, gay men, and femininity. While that is not true, necessarily, it works well as a metaphor and for subtext in the series. Ryan’s theatre/dance-centered personality is made as such because he is one of the few openly gay students in the movie. Theatre and dance, in this context, are queer. And Ryan is incredibly open with his sexuality, especially after he steps out from his sister’s shadow and comes into himself, realising who he is in his entirety.

Chad is on the opposite side of the spectrum. He’s, to put it bluntly, a Chad. Sporty, masculine, ‘straight’, everything he’s expected to be, but, secretly, he knows that that’s not quite true. He’s likely bisexual, as we never recive a label I will refer to him as such, and he knows this about himself. He accepts it, but refuses to act on it, or really acknowledge it, so it is not true acceptance. He is still hiding and suppressing part of himself, dancing only when everyone around him is doing the same, conforming to the heterosexual society that we all must reside in. So much of who he appears to be centered around sport and straightness, but after he is left by his closest friend (Asshole Troy. My cousin stunt-doubled Zac Effron once lol) he’s unsure where to go, and accepts an offer to play a friendly game of baseball against Ryan.

Ryan knows that Chad is bi. He knows that Chad is suppressing and hiding a part of himself, and, on some level, understands what that’s like, and knows how harmful that can be, and takes it upon himself to change that, and the game begins. Literally. And of all games, it’s baseball, one of the only sports I know filled to the brim with euphemisms and gay slang, and let me tell you, I know very little about both things, but I did actaully do research before this.

Chad knows what Ryan is trying to do, and rejects it, insisting that he has to ‘just do his thing.’ He steps up, the batter, insisting that he can be straight, that he doesn’t need that other part of himself to feel whole. Ryan sees clearly that this is bullshit.

‘I’ll show you that it’s one in the same, baseball, dancing, same game.’ In this line, Ryan is explaining that Chad doesn’t need to give up his masculinity or his love for sport to live in his true identity, that dancing and baseball are the same thing, different flavours. He can stay who he is while still being true to himself and stop suppressing a part of himself. He’s also flirting, a lot. Saying that he can show Chad what he’s missing.

‘I wanna play ball now, and that’s all. This is what I do. It ain't no dance that you can show me,’ replies Chad, saying how he doesn’t agree, and has no wish to change who he is, regardless of the consequences. He doesn’t think that the two parts of his identity can live in harmony, and he’s gotten this far in life while suppressing his queer side, he can do it forever. Of course, as you likely already know, dear reader, this is far from true, and Ryan has made it his mission to prove that, through song and suspiciously flirtatious dance.

‘You’ll never know, if you never try.’ Ryan now is telling Chad that he’ll never know if he can be happier as an open bisexual if he doesn’t try to expirience life in a different way, and is also telling Chad he’s dtf.

‘There’s just one little thing that stops me every time.’ Chad is on the verge of agreeing, accepting Ryan’s advances, when it cuts to his team, watching him play. He can’t come out, can’t fully accept himself, even if he wants to, without risking rejection from his team, from his friends, and having to possibly leave behind the world of sports that he so loves. The masculinity is fragile in this one, I must say. But his team not backing him up, leaving him behind, that scares Chad more than anything at that point in his life. Even if it is living his truth, he won’t risk the life already built up around him. In his eyes, nothing would truly be worth it. But Ryan won’t give up on him.

Then the pair go back and forth, arguing over whether Chad has it in him to accept it, risk everything to be who he truly is. ‘If I can do this then you can do that.’ Ryan is telling Chad that if he can play baseball while still retaining his queer identity, then Chad can do the same while dancing. Doing one thing does not invalidate or cancel out the other. He can, and should, do both, to become a more complete version of himself. However, Chad’s team is still supporting him only in baseball, at this point in the song anyway.

‘Hey, batter, batter. Hey batter, batter, swing.’ At this point, no one is actually swinging at the ball, showing that this is not what they’re talking about. ‘Swing that way,’ is often used to refer to whom one is attracted to, and Ryan is telling Chad to ‘swing,’ to come to terms with his attraction to men, and to Ryan himself. While they are singing this, Chad is literally approaching first base, not too dissimilar from the bases in a relationship. Like, any other sport, any one at all, and they had to pick this one. Even urban dictionary agrees it’s gay as all hell.

‘Bases loaded, do your dance. It’s easy.’ Here, Ryan is telling Chad that baseball is almost a dance on its own, it requires movement and coordination like dance, and at this point Chad can’t disagree, because the bases are loaded (I do actually know what that means) and he has to hit the ball and free them up, else something happens (reaching the end of my baseball knowledge sorry).

‘I've got what it takes, playin my game. So you better spin that pitch. You're gonna throw me, yeah.’ Here Chad is admitting that Ryan is distracting him, his dance and words throwing him off his game. ‘I’ll show you how I swing.’ Chad is play-flirting now, not-quite-mockingly responding to Ryan while dancing, ever so slightly, while still remaining in the game. He comes closer to accepting it than he has before, but still refusing to truly accept it.

With Ryan’s line, ‘hit it out of the park,’ we return ever so slightly to the literal playing of the game, and Ryan telling Chad to give it his best shot, showing his support despite being on the opposing team. Moments later, members of Chad’s team begin dancing as well, using the movements to enhance their play somewhat, and, subtly, showing their support for dancing and all that comes with it. Chad, however, has still not reached that point.

‘Lean back, tuck it in, take a chance. Swing it out, spin around, do the dance.’ Ryan’s now explaining how connected dancing and baseball really are, how they can easily coexist, of course playing into what Ryan has been trying to convince Chad of the whole time, that he can accept himself and still remain as Chad-like as he wants.

‘I wanna play ball, not dance hall.’ Chad doesn’t care, instead staying steadfast in his position that sport and dance must stay seperate, but his actions betray his words, as, however mockingly it may be, he does in fact dance along to those lines.

‘I can prove it to you til you know it's true. 'Cause I can swing it, I can bring it to the diamond too.’ Ryan is not giving up. He’s trying his best to say that he’s a dancer, sure, but his skills help him on the field. Were he not a dancer, he would likely not be as good at baseball as he is, explaining that if you are repressing a part of yourself, then you are not living up to your full potential, and not living life to its fullest.

‘You’re talking a lot, show me what you got.’ Prove it, Chad is saying as he throws the ball. And Ryan swings, and hits it, sending it far out over the playing field, proving his point, and with that, Ryan relents. Now, as he says he doesn’t dance, he’s dancing with his whole team behind him. They’re showing their support, and the dance becomes almost making fun of his past stance, and now he and Ryan flirt relentlessly through the song, as they dance.

They repeat their banter, all while dancing, and they come extremely close, closer than anyone else in the court, coming closer and closer to first base.

‘You can do it.’ It’s Chad’s team now, dancing behind him, showing their support for him, and insisting that he can dance, he can accept his identity in its whole, and they will still be behind him, still accept him for who he is. Chad and Ryan dance across from each other, back and forth, all of both teams and the crowd, all of them showing support.

Even as it returns to Chad batting, he does so bouncing on his toes to the music, and as he scores a home run, clearing the bases, each of his team members who are on the bases reach home with a flourish, a dance move of their own, even though they themselves are straight. Likely.

However, during the whole song, Ryan and Chad were openly flirting, the song is many things, as Chad knew his sexuality, he just wasn’t comfortable enough to admit it. At first the flirting was jokingly, on Chad’s side anyway, but tensions rise as the song continues, and Ryan makes sure Chad understands that this isn’t a joke, he means it. And that takes a few minutes for Chad to truly accept. The song is about self-acceptance and the chemistry between the two characters, more chemistry than literally any other characters, including Troy and Gabriella.

As the song ends, and Chad scores a home run, winning the game, the two fall over each other at the home base, and it’s over, the scene is anyway, and with the end of the game comes the end of Chad’s suppression. He can finally accept his bisexuality with the knowledge that his team will stay behind him and that he can be happy with a man just as he could with a woman, something that prior to this song, he didn’t truly believe.

And then, in the next scene, Ryan and Chad are wearing each other’s clothes, talking about the game in a far friendlier manner than any previous interaction. Together, they have hotdogs and good conversation, and the swapping of their clothes, including hats, implies that they totally fucked. Not to sound insensitive, obviously, but please, if you can think of any other explanation, please enlighten me.

Now, how does this tie into the rest of High School Musical? I should mention now I’ve not seen the third one and can barely remember the other two. However, I believe I know enough for my point to have some grounds. In this movie trilogy, theatre is queerness, as I have already explained, and conforming to society is heteronormativity. The path of Troy accepting that he loves theatre and basketball at the same time is one of accepting himself in his entirety. While I don’t personally believe that the character himself is queer, it is still a path of acceptance that still resonates with much of the LGBTQ+ community who would watch this movie.

The whole idea of the series is rejecting the status quo and living your life without rejecting any part of yourself. This is taken to another level between Chad and Ryan, someone who has accepted himself completely, and someone who doesn’t want to give up the life he has. There is little else to be said on the matter (LIES! I could talk about this for so long) so it appears time to wrap it up.

I don’t care that much about High School Musical. That may seem surprising, but before this weekend, I couldn’t tell you the character’s names. It is a strange feeling to fall so completely into something that you ignore all schoolwork to write an analysis (strong word) of a clip of a movie. I downloaded the Osu map (after finding it by accident) and played it until I got an S, even tho I’ve had the game only for a couple weeks, barely ever play it, and the easiest version of the map was 2.3 stars. I couldn’t tell you how many times I’ve listened to it, and I had to finish this piece of writing so I could have some semblance of peace, as all my friends are tired of hearing about it but I need to get my thoughts out. Perhaps now that this is done I can pay attention to the science class that’s been happening around me. I think I’ve said all I can, and I hope that is enough to satisfy my mind. And I am well aware that there is someone out there who has done this with fewer and better words, but I don’t really care.

TLDR; High School Musical 2 is gay, and even more gay than that is Chad and Ryan. Thank you and goodnight.

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trashbaggage · 4 years ago

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a mr. and mrs. smith-flavoured assassin au

geralt and jaskier are assassins for different firms and run into each other on a job, thinking the other is a civilian. they use each other as a cover and (fall in love) get married, it’s all for the cover, swearsies :)

cut to like, 5 years later. they got a house in the suburbs and ciri stays with them every other week when she’s not at mom!yennefer’s place. they’re a little domestic family.

yennefer, unbeknownst to them, is the head of the firm jaskier works with. tissaia runs the other firm which employs geralt, and the two have a (mostly) friendly rivalry going on. ciri sees what’s up with her dads and tells yen; yen can’t believe the two most unsubtle (when not on a job) people she’s met haven’t clued in to the fact they both kill people for a living. she thinks it’s hilarious. she tells tissaia. she also thinks it’s hilarious and even lets out a slightly inelegant laugh. they decide to help the boys by sending them both on the same fake job.

the day of the set up comes, and while they’re both trying to go for the target they see each other. they’re both incredibly startled, and geralt sees jaskier give a sheepish wave through his scope as the target gets away.

jaskier gets back to the house first, with geralt not far behind, and before jaskier can get more than a “well, that was awkward darling” out geralt slams him up against a wall. jask is a bit disoriented but soon gets with the program. they fight and roll around (making a right mess of the place, good thing yen planned for this all to happen when it was her week with ciri) until geralt has jask pinned on the kitchen floor with the knife that was taped behind the professional portrait of roach the cat geralt drunkenly commissioned one night and jask just goes “wow, you’re really committing to this bit, I thought when you finally caved into my unsubtle role play hints you would just kinda half-ass it”. geralt stops and is visibly confused. “while this ‘fight’ (jask even does the air quotes) was quite exhilarating, i think that’s enough foreplay, c’mon and ravish me”.

geralt is still hella ????? and is like, uh, are we not gonna talk about how we just found out we’re rival assassins???? and jask goes uh, jUST??? babe, i’ve known you were an assassin for years, i THOUGHT YOU KNEW I WAS ONE TOO AND WE JUST WEREN’T TALKING ABOUT IT. and geralt is just WHAT.

jask: i thought you just wanted to keep work and home separate or smth, and that’s why we never seriously talked about it idk, but i make jokes about it ALL THE TIME

geralt: you thought i wouldn’t want to talk about the fact we both KILL PEOPLE FOR A LIVING?? and what jokes???

jaskier: i always wink when i ask about your day and how work can be ‘killer’

geralt: that’s just,, normal stuff! how would i have known from that??

jaskier: i call you john wick all the time and point out all the things they get wrong in assassin movies

geralt: but -

jaskier: you yell at me about leaving my knives out everywhere

geralt: i thought you just liked collecting sharp, pretty things -

jaskier: you’ve LITERALLY walked in on me stuffing body parts in a trash bag

geralt: it was halloween!! i thought they were fake! i thought you were just really into decorating that year!!!

jaskier: ....fine, I’ll give you that one, my haunted house that year was very involved and spooky. but i wrote ‘you’re the best ass-assin i know x’ in your birthday card three months ago!!!

geralt: you know how i feel about puns, i just thought you were being a little shit

jaskier: ohmygod, ohhhh my god how. you just - no. nope. we’re not fighting about this, all parties now know the truth, can we just get back to the sexytimes and talk later?

geralt: .....yeah ok

they do the do.

they eventually talk everything out.

yennefer congratulates them when she drops off ciri, and ciri just looks at the partially destroyed house and goes “FINALLY” and “my room better be in one piece” and jaskier and geralt deal with the twin bombshells of yen also being in the business and jaskier’s boss and the fact that ciri figured them out, but c’mon, she’s yen’s daughter, she knows what’s up.

the only real conflict in this story is

man vs. self as geralt tries to look back on their relationship with new eyes and sees a LOT of things making more sense and laments he’s not even the cleverest assassin in his own home

and

idiot vs. idiot (no explanation needed)

and

yennefer vs. man as she roasts both of them for being so goddamn oblivious and having the communication skills of a particularly dense walnut

everyone lives happily ever after, the end

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1010ll · 4 years ago

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do you have any new recipes that you've learned recently? i remember you wrote something a while ago about carbonara and i tried it out for myself it was really fun!!

i love this 😭 im gonna write way too much idec! something that has changed since that post: my kitchen is worse. i have a horrible combi oven which has resulted in me accidentally eating raw chicken, because it had been in there for more than 2 hours at supposedly 230 °C and i was really hungry and thought it HAD to be done by then. also i have less time and less money lol. it has made me a bit sad, and less motivated to cook nice things but i also love food! which means these tips/recipes are gonna reflect that and might seem a bit dull but probably also relatable for a lot of people. i’ve definitely made spaghetti carbonara a bit too much because it’s simple and require few ingredients! will still vouch for that one tip about substituting the bacon with roasted veggies and other types of meat.

last week i made risotto for the very first time, i think? which means i might be assuming a bit too much, but i think it’s a great dish that you can almost make with whatever you have in your fridge. i made it with roasted beetroot(needs A LOT of time to soften, lesson learned), carrots and parsley root or parsnip(idk the difference), dried rosemary and thyme, garlic and onion. i had some leftover sushi rice, which is great for risotto apparently(love versatile ingredients), roasted them in some oil and then added white wine and chicken stock and actually added a leftover parmesan rind i had in the fridge to give the ‘stock’ some flavour, a bit of nutmeg and then in the end some shredded gouda lol… it was surprisingly delicious and i didn’t even really care to cook the rice perfectly. it also tasted delicious 3 days later, which was a nice surprise. i bet there are tons of risotto recipes online, but as long as you have rice, some kind of flavoured water, i guess you could kind of add whatever you want of veggies and top with whatever herb you have around.

another type of porridge i consume a lot these days is hot oat porridge, which i’ve eaten since i was little and it was the first ‘dish’ i learnt to make myself and it’s cheap. some people really dislike the consistency and look but i don’t. it’s also very easy to customise. i put in whatever nuts and seeds(which are often cheaper than nuts) i have around: flaxseed, sesame seeds, pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, chopped almonds and sometimes a dollop of peanut butter. i let them simmer along with the oats. i like adding those elements because it gives it some texture and it keeps me more full throughout the day. it’s very important to me because i hate spending money i don’t have on fast-food when i’m not home and i hate being hungry. dried raisins, cranberries for a bit of sweetness and if i’m treating myself i’ll add some fresh apples cut into small pieces or some homemade berry compote(i use frozen) or brown sugar. if i had more money i’d use maple syrup but i don’t at the moment. i also add a bit of cinnamon and cardamom, dried ginger etc, whatever you feel like. some people also add milk afterwards but i’d rather spend my milk on my coffee.

a small tip: making chili flake / garlic oil. it’s really delicious, you could put it straight on pasta with some parmesan and pepper and it would be a filling meal. either chop the garlic really fine, grate it, microplane it, smash it to pieces. heat some olive oil until it’s quite hot, then remove from heat and add the chili flakes and garlic. if the oil isn’t hot enough you can just put the pan or pot back on the heat but be careful you don’t burn the chili flakes or garlic, as it will make it bitter. the longer it will toast, the less pronounced the raw garlic flavour will be, so when it smells toasted enough for your taste, take it off. i store it in a tiny glass jar and add it in stews, sauces, toasts, pizza, sandwiches etc. the flavour is very strong imo and everything it touches will smell like it. something to drink: i like strong foods and i like sour foods, which is why i like lemon/ginger based drinks. to make it even more winter friendly and easy to make, i like to grate unpeeled ginger(i hate slices of ginger, they do nothing for me and seems like a waste of ginger), lemon zest, lemon juice and mix it or blend it with some water/apple juice and honey and strain it afterwards. if you have a really nice blender you can just add all of it together with some ice. i’m basically making a large amount of ginger shot mixture. then when i feel like it, i can take some of the mixture and either drink it as it is, add more apple juice if i need a refreshing beverage or add hot water and more honey for when im cold. you could also add turmeric, chili, use less sweetener and other sorts of healthy stuff but i honestly do it for the taste so i don’t care about that that much.

something sweet: i posted earlier about cakes and someone mentioned swedish kladdkaka, which is a super delicious, cheap, brownie-like chocolate cake that is easily customized and hard to fuck up which is why i’ve made it since i was very young and is a go-to and i didn’t even know it was a swedish thing. if you like airy, light cakes this is not for your. this is sticky, sweet and almost like confection. you can add nuts, swirls of peanutbutter, tahini, actual pieces of chocolate, replace the white sugar with brown sugar, the butter with oil(you can be fancy and use a bit of olive oil) or use a mixture, brown the butter, you name it. the recipe i use is this: melt 100 g butter and let cool. mix 2 eggs + 3 dl sugar in a bowl until fluffy in one bowl. mix 1.5 dl flour, 4 tbs cocoa, 1 pinch of salt in another. mix the dry with the wet mixture and add the cooled, melted butter. this is the point where you’d add chopped nuts, chocolate etc. pour the batter into a cake tin lined with parchment (i use one that is 16 cm in diameters i think). bake the cake for around 30 mins at 150°C - 175°C degrees. check on the cake using a cake tester or a a knife. if the knife is clean after … stabbing it, it’s done! the cake will change it’s texture after cooling. this is a cheap cake, and if you like cake dough you might want to give it less time in the oven for a more fudgey texture. make it your own! there are no rules. last time i made this, i left it in for too long in my opinion but it was still delicious. also i literally have a shit oven with a round oven rack that goes in circles no matter what due to the microwave function, and the only ‘mixing’ equipment i have is a whisk and a spatula. no need for kitchen aids or even electrical hand mixers.

something else i’ve been eating a lot for lunch is simple open faced sandwiches, and something that can really elevate those is: making your own mayonnaise(and toasting the bread). it can be challenging, but it’s really worth it imo and i can’t remember the last time i bought it in a store. i have a small plastic bowl, whisk and 1 egg yolk. something i can really recommend is buying pour snouts for bottles. i transfer my oils from their plastic bottles to smaller, old soda bottles because im cheesy like that and it’s really handy especially when making mayo. constantly whisking the egg yolk by hand and then adding the NEUTRAL oil ever so slowly. don’t be fancy and use cold pressed stuff or extra virgin olive oil because it will taste weird. i only ever fail when i try to use immersion blenders for some weird reason but i find it rewarding to do by hand anyways and i think it might be easier to make smaller portions that way. mayo needs acid and you can get it by adding regular vinegar, apple cider vinegar, balsamic vinegar, lemon juice, lime juice, pickle juice, citric acid dissolved in water etc. it’s really easy to customise! when im making banh mi, i add some sesame oil, soy sauce for saltiness and use lime as the acidic element. for more regular use i add a bit of mustard(also helps with the emulsion), for fries, i like adding some fresh garlic. something as simple as mayo, tomatoes, flaky salt and pepper topped with chives is really nice. i also really like using slices of boiled potatoes or boiled eggs(idk if that’s only a thing where i’m from), mayo and the chili garlic oil. it’s also great for making tuna salad. yesterday i made a really simple sandwich with a very simple tuna salad(tuna, mayo, yoghurt, lemon and pepper), arugula, basil, the garlic/chili oil, cream cheese, pickled jalapeños and onions, green peber, cucumber and tomatoes. you could leave out everything but the tuna salad and it would still be a great little meal.

another nice condiment that beats the supermarket stuff by far is homemade ‘pesto’. when i buy parsley from my local grocery store, it’s a gigantic amount that i in no way can consume in a week. first of all when buying fresh herbs i really recommend washing them, wrapping them in a damp towel and keeping them in a closed container. it will prolong their lifetime from lasting a day to a week(change the towel if it seems too wet). i once had some cilantro in my fridge for several weeks and still be fresh. anyways, when i buy that much parsley, i like to remove the tougher parts of the stem(which i use in stews/sauces! chop it up and sautee it along with garlic and onion), add literally just olive oil, water, pepper, garlic, and a bit of acid and then blend away! it keeps for a long time in the fridge and is also delicious beneath tomatoes/potatoes/cheese on open-faced sandwiches. if you want to be fancy you can of course add some type of hard cheese, nuts, seeds, dried tomatoes, whatever.

i know this is the longest text post ever, but as a last reminder, i really recommend watching pasta grannies on youtube. really simple recipes with focus on few, good ingredients that just takes some time and love.

#sorry about the spelling mistakes and everything #it's not my first language but it probably wouldn't be much better if it were #food

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pocmuzings · 4 years ago

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hello hi , it is g , ur friendly local neighbourhood hindu indian ( as in south asian ) ! so a few people requested that i just make a guide-esque sorta thing on hindu indian characters ! im not really good at guides , so instead , these are just little things i’ve noticed or picked up on that could really potentially strengthen the next indian character u ( pretty please ! ) pick up !

disclaimer : i am writing this from my perspective and it is NOT definitive , nor do i speak on behalf of all hindu indians ! i am a 23-year-old bisexual cis female hindu indian , with one older gay brother, and a Train Wreck middle brother . my mother is from new delhi , and my father is from nairobi but has indian heritage ( not sure which part of india bc he’s an Engima ) . i have extended family in india and have visited india about 10-15 times throughout my entire life .

so firstly , im so glad u all are here and want to write more hindu indian characters ! please please do so ! i hope this helps , encourages u , and isnt too confusing !!

psa : i need everyone to know that this is a very basic ‘ guide ‘ and theres a lot it DOESNT touch on or address bc i didnt want to get too Extensive and Detailed and have people Turn off and not Read it . this is just written in the terms of hopefully helping build character / be relevant to characters a bit better that ive employed into writing my OWN hindu indian character creations ! but if u have any other questions pls reach out to me or any other indians in the rpc and im sure we’ll try our best to assist u !

FCS:

one thing i’d really like to say is that its great to see fcs like dev patel , deepika padukone and avan jogia picked up every now and then in rps , but there’s actually a LOT of other indian fcs you could be and should be using ! the main reason people don’t seem to know them is because they’re not ‘ hollywood ‘ stars per se ( it was a super big deal when pr*yanka broke out of bollywood and into bollywood but we don’t talk about her on this Blog ) . they’re usually bollywood stars and i don’t really see bollywood discussed that much in the rpc !

if you’re after MORE indian fcs , i have a tag of indian females here , and indian males here . the fcs on my blogs are also not ALL that exist . there are plenty of other blogs out there that post indian fcs , such as sonamhelps & bollymusings !!! there’s also some really great faceclaim directories out there that include a LOT of indians with resources !

unfortunately , i do not know of any trans indians or nonbinary indians but that doesn’t mean they don’t exist . indian cultures and beliefs are still quite Old School and not super progressive . india only just had it’s first wlw mainstream bollywood film released last year . lgbtqia+ issues are NOT really spoken about in india or within indian families at ALL , and if they are - they’re usually dismissed or reacted to Very Very Badly . ( again this isnt definitive and im sure and hopeful that some indians have had GREAT coming out stories and been accepted by their families but this has not been a common thing ive seen or witnessed from my cousins my age , indian friends , myself and my brother who are lgbtqia + )

FOOD :

we do eat with our hands and we eat like PROS with our hands . we can shovel it so easily and quickly . i don’t know how to describe it but you use the first three fingers of your hand to place the Food there , and then use your thumb to kinda scoop it off and into your mouth . this is NOT unhygienic because indians wash their hands very regularly and most of the time we aren’t actually touching our mouths to our hands !

indian food is MADE to be eaten with your hands for the most part . it is literally NOT practical to eat food with a knife and fork . here’s a really great article explaining things more in depth re: indian food and using our hands !

cows are seen as Very holy beings in hindu indian culture , and for that reason - there isn’t a lot of beef being eaten or consumed. sure , some indians DO eat beef but i don’t think its super common, but in my personal experience as a non-beef-eater this results in A LOT of me asking ‘ oh , sorry what sauce does that pasta come with ? ‘ ‘ oh those are beef sausages ? sorry i can’t eat them ‘ etc etc . beef is in a LOT of things , and this makes me very very careful and almost pedantic about what i do eat and ask about , food wise !

indian food is seen as stinky by a majority of white people . it has a very very strong smell as im sure u know , and opening ur lunch box as a little kid to a Curry or Dal ur mum has made u ? one way street to being bullied . i also remember a time a real estate agent continuously told my dad nobody was interested in buying our house bc it smelled too much like curry, despite my mum not having cooked curry in Weeks ( just say what u Really mean , bitch ! )

indian curry exists but so does dal / daal . this is curry-like dish that is usually made out of lentils . so if ur going to talk about indian food and u know curries and samosas . . pls also bring up dals . and sabji ! ( sabji is usually just boiled vegetables plopped together . a lot of potato usually )

desserts are what we call Indian Sweets . this is stuff that is usually very VERY sugary and a bit of an accustomed taste . theyre very colourful and LOOK beautiful but even i , for one , can not eat many indian sweets bc they are a Lot of Sweet and Sugar . examples of indian sweets that u can google : gulab jamun , burfi , rasgulla , jalebi etc . here’s a great link for more !

give me spiced food or give me death . literally . . put some cumin in . . put some garam masala . . put some chillies . . flavour ur Food for my Indian Taste Buds

FAMILY :

if you are the oldest son of an Indian Family . . congratulations . you are now the Head of the family and must carry every weight and burden alone . it is extremely isolating and taxing on you ( my dad is the oldest indian son , and also - so is my eldest brother , obvs ) . there is a LOT that is expected of you to do . you are expected to quite literally run the family and be the ‘ man of the house ‘ by yourself .

if you are a daughter . . . even BIGGER congratulations ! you are basically a maid to every male or guest who EVER comes over to your house . you must be a Hostess , you must be in the kitchen cooking , serving snacks, bringing tea , and then washing up and basically waiting on Hand and Foot . you will not be included into a lot of dialogue or engaged in a lot of conversation and TRUST ME ! THAT WILL GRIND UR GOD DAMN GEARS IN THE 21ST CENTURY !

if you are a boys’ boy ( aka straight and Sporty ) , then congrats ! you get it the easiest : you are the favourite of every social event . the uncles and cousins love talking to you and dude-ing it up with you , and the aunts fawn over you and think you’re the Best Thing since sliced bread . sit back , put your feet up , and expect to be treated like a God. you can do absolutely no wrong . ( my middle brother is this to a T and listen . . he’s been in and out of jail for physical violence and ab*se for over 5 years . and family still FROTH over him . my teeth are gritted to dust thinking of this again )

indian aunties are lethal . they gossip like teenage girls . they will find out everything . they will bitch behind your back . they can NOT be trusted .

everyone is ur uncle or aunt, sister or brother . literally everyone . ur cousin ? no. thats ur sister . ur dads friend ? no , thats ur uncle . you will call them as such . EVERYONE is family .

family is in general a VERY BIG THING in indian culture , too . ‘ what will it Look like to everyone else if we don’t all arrive together ? ‘ my dad usually asks dskjdfjn . it’s all about Looking Right and Standing As A United Front . that being said , indian family has undying and unwavering loyalty for one another , they just show it in a very Weird way .

FASHION:

female hindu indian formal clothes are usually really embroidered to hell and back and this makes them very scratchy , uncomfortable, and HEAVY . you aren’t running anywhere anytime soon in a full blown lehenga or saree

most ‘ modern ‘ hindu indian women do not wear full Indian Clothes all the time . some do , but usually it’s a lot of wearing a kurti tunic with jeans , or just normal everyday clothing . again , this is going to be different based on which parts of india your character is from , though !

usually , older women and married women wear traditiona hindul indian clothing quite often . i know my mum wore a sari AT HOME everyday when i was growing up, until i was like 13 and took her shopping with me to get something Else to wear .

bindi’s just stick right onto ur forehead but they do fall off a lot , especially when ur wearing makeup or sweating . again , you don’t need to wear a bindi everyday , unless thats ur preference . i usually only wear them for festivals . ( festivals means indian celebrations , not like . . coachella ((which u should not be wearing a bindi to , if ur not indian fyi )) )

male formal clothes are usually just literally anything Formal and buttoned up for the most part , and u can get away with that , or you can wear a really nice kurta

indians wear white at funerals , not black ( not sure if this should go in the fashion section but this entire thing is being organised into a Mess by now anyways ) . you CAN wear black to a funeral of course , but its common to wear white !

DATING ( tw’s for islamaphobia ):

modern day indian / desi fuck boys exist and my god they are Something Else . hasan minhaj did a really good piece about this and explaining them to a T ( starts at 1:43 )

( THIS IS THE POINT THAT WILL MENTION ISLAMAPHOBIA AND HOMOPHOBIA ! ) basically according to Older indians , , ur dating options in 2020 go like this ( if ur a cis female like me ) : hindu indian men are god tier , white men are Not Okay But I Guess So Bc We Have To Accept They’re Everywhere , females / being lgbtqia+ is not Taken Seriously , and muslims are literally not even close to being an option or Accepted . again this isn’t definitive but based on a lot of indian media i’ve consumed and seen how they portray muslims in general as well as Dating Options , as well as talking to other indians , both who are older / traditional and hold these ideals , whereas Younger gens generally do NOT hold these ideals / actively are Against these backwards ideals. i remember when i was in year 6 and had my first boyfriend . . he was a muslim and my dad FLIPPED the FUCK out . it’s not even that i was dating someone / young / his only daughter . . it was mainly because i was dating a muslim . again , this is a very OLD SCHOOL and traditional way of thinking and it is NOT CORRECT . pls don’t take this as a note to be islamaphobic if u write an indian character bc . . thats literally the opposite of what im trying to tell u here .

yeah arranged marriages are definitely still a thing for us , even now in 2020

YES if u are an unmarried / single indian ( ESPECIALLY if ur a woman ) about to enter ur 30s . . ur in DANGER and u are the black sheep and theres probably something Wrong With You bc why are u still single ?

TRADITIONS / BELIEFS / SUPERSTITIONS :

idk if its just me and my family but we are SUPER superstitious . if you say anything like ‘ he hasnt gotten sick in years !’ immediately , everyone knocks on wood or their head . if you were planning on leaving the house and sneeze ? thats bad luck , stand and wait for five minutes then u can leave . we have a strong belief in drishti , or alternatively : The Evil Eye , and making sure we don’t invite it into our lives . a lot of our prayers are about warding drishti away .

the evil eye is kinda Complicated but basically its an ill-wishing upon an unsuspecting person . if somebody is jealous of you or angered by you , they may wish upon you or cast upon you the Evil eye ( or even just glare at u whilst ur not looking and thats Big Bad ) .

a lot of older indians , like older people in general i guess , are not super progressive or Open . this isnt ALWAYS the case but older indians can be very very stubborn in their beliefs in what is Right and Wrong , Normal and Not Normal

theres a LOT of hindu indian festivals and events ! tbh too many for me to even keep up with . but without fail at least once a year ill say to ONE of my friends ‘ oh sorry i cant make it . i have an indian Thing on that day ‘ and its usually about a festival , so pls be aware that there are a LOT of indian festivals and if ur writing an indian character , its perfectly understandable and Relatable for them to say they can’t make it to a party or hang out with their friends that night , for that very reason !

the main / most popular ( ? ) festivities that i personally do celebrate every year without fail are :

diwali ( the festival of lights , celebrating goddess lakshmi roaming the earth . in my household this is usually turning on literally every single light and lighting candles and fireworks / sparklers and saying some prayers , and eating a formal dinner all together ! )

holi ( the festival of colours . celebrating victory and love . again personally for me , this was usually celebrated at the temple with all of us Kids running around throwing paint on each other ! )

rakhi / raksha bandhan ( a day of sisters celebrating their brothers . you tie a rakhi which is usually a bracelet / holy string around your brothers wrist , feed them some food , pray for their wellbeing and in return they gift you something . in my case, i usually get money from them ) .

navratri / durga puja ( 9 nights and 10 days of celebrations but tbh u don’t have to do all the days . or i mean . . i don’t . i fast one day from morning to night and then i slide on over to boogie and dance dandiya which is literally the MOST FUN dance ever bc its based off some Historical Fight and u go faster and faster and keep going until ur absolutely SPENT bc u dont wanna lose ur place in the circle )

there are SO MANY HINDU INDIAN GODS too . and so many prayers to all of them and to just general Life Wellness . chances are that ur character will know at least ONE aarti / gazal / prayer off by heart and have sung it at least 30 times in a monotone voice . the ones i know off by heart bc ive had to sing them 3000 times ? om jai jagdish hare , & the gayatri mantra

GENERAL LIL THINGS I DIDN’T KNOW HOW TO CATEGORISE ( tw’s for skin whitening , colorism and classism ) :

( THIS IS THE POINT THAT NEEDS A TW FOR SKIN WHITENING AND COLORISM ) lets hold indians accountable right now : we advertise SKIN LIGHTENING CREAM . i think they finally stopped that earlier this year / due to BLM ( i’m not entirely sure / could be wrong ) , but thats literally how bad it is , that we would openly advertise and encourage people to literally bleach their skin rather than look darker .

( THIS IS THE POINT THAT NEEDS A TW FOR COLORISM AND CLASSISM ) colorism is a BIG thing in india and usually linked to class . generally speaking , the people who are Darker Skinned are usually people who work outside / labourers or homeless even , and are therefore seen as lower class / bottom class . the lighter skin you have , the more privileged and advantaged you are bc ur seen as working a Good job out of the sun and having a home . it’s incredibly classist as well as just generally Fucked Up . why am i telling u this ? mainly so u understand the importance of using a dark skinned indian fc vs a light skinned indian fc which i know is hard , bc a lot of darker skinned indians arent in hollywood / have resources , but its still something to Think About .

i have a long Ethnic name . literally my first name is 10+ letters , which i know doesnt seem that long Necessarily but its also a Super Ethnic name with e’s and and j and n . it Flows and Sounds very clearly different from a christian name . it is VERY important to me that my name be said Correctly because i’ve spent so much time having it said incorrectly or Westernised . i also know a lot of indians my age who ( like me ) have had to dramatically shorten their REAL first name ( which is usually also pretty long . not always , but it is Common ) , to fit their name into white people’s mouths better . please put some thought into ur indian characters name !

not all indians speak hindi ! hindi is one of MANY dialects within india . there is also tamil , urdu , bengali , punjabi , telugu and SO many more , so pls research which part of india ur character / their family is from bc hindi won’t always be the default language for them !

not every indian is hindu ! of course ur character doesnt have to be religious at all , bc if im being honest IM barely religious but my FAMILY is and this is smth u should think abt bc religion is a pretty big thing for indians . so even if ur character isnt hindu , they were probably raised with SOME religious beliefs . have a think about which religions they would have been brought up with ! there’s a very large percentage of practicing muslims , sikhs and buddhists too ! and even christianity !

WRITING WISE / CREATING AN INDIAN CHARACTER WISE :

the first step should be to consume indian media ! listen to indian music . watch bollywood movies ! theres SO MANY out there on everyone’s netflix . if u want some recs , let me know and i can try my best to find smth for u ! if u want smth thats Hollywood-indian . . . Hasan Minhaj is great to watch , especially his episodes on indian culture / politics , and Never Have I Ever on netflix was rlly good / relatable for me personally as an indian growing up in a western society !

i would really really love to see more indian rep in general , but i’d also like to discuss the Stereotypes that ive seen indians portrayed as in mainstream hollywood media :

indian women as soft spoken and subservient beings who are abused by their husbands and have no say in anything

heterosexuality within indian relationships and indian dating

indian men as sleazy

indians in general not being seen as Sexy or Sexual beings with any sex drive at all

Stumbling , Stuttering , Nerdy awkward messes of men who don’t know how to interact with anybody they find sexually appealing

an indian character that everybody ( usually white ) finds Uncomfortable and Weird and is seen as usually the Butt of the joke .

i think those mentioned above could be helpful in how to plan your next indian character and think about how to SUBVERT a trope theyre often portrayed as , or create an indian thats not stereotypical !

so what and who SHOULD you write ?

an indian character who is proudly and openly gay , or bi

a trans or nonbinary indian ( PLEASE ! )

an indian character with really super accepting parents and family

an aromantic indian

an indian who is focused on their career first and not their dating life

a fuckboy / fuckgirl ( honestly . . i’d love to see it )

a indian character who is a party animal

an outspoken indian female who takes no shit and is strong in every sense of the word

a confident , smooth talking indian businessman who is Sexy and Lusted After ( not in a gross christian grey way but just . i’d love to see indian characters seen as Sexy . not in a fetishy way , either , but just because it’d be a nice change in pace ! )

a character who IS traditional / religious but also very progressive and forward thinking in their beliefs

honestly just any character that isnt whats mentioned above

#guide #writing help #rph #rpc #islamaphobia tw #colorism tw #classism tw #idk if this is any good and i was very uncomfortable putting in the part abt how a lot of older indians feel abt muslims #but i mean . . lets just call it the fuck out bc its Gross Behaviour so lets call it out and work to change it #anyways every trigger is tagged super clearly in every point that talks abt it #i kept those parts Brief and as Direct and Honest as possible #pls let me know if u need me to tag anything #and lastly . . . pls write indian characters !!!!

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thevalleyisjolly · 3 years ago

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1, 3, 15 and 40 for jo and vyce!

Thanks Jack! :D

1. why did they choose their class(es)? their subclass(es)?

Jo is a twilight cleric because Kristen Applebees was absolutely iconic in the Senior Year finale. Also, turns out it's a great subclass for a horror themed campaign! There isn't really a Watsonian perspective on this, I very much built her character around the class.

I've mentioned before about Vyce coming to me in a dream and (uncharacteristically) telling me his whole life story, but there was a bit of wiggle room with the class. Ranger and fighter could also have worked really well for him, and I picked rogue largely because Vax looked like so much fun and also, sneak attack. I went with the Scout subclass because his backstory is literally a military scout, it sounded like a really different and interesting flavouring of rogue, and I didn't want to build the character too similar to Vax.

3. what is their goal right now?

Jo wants to find out what that mysterious glow in the subterranean tunnel was! Probably nothing that'll put the party in mortal danger, right?

Vyce would like to survive the next fight, which is about the diciest it's ever looked for the party. They're on a haunted shipwreck, and on the deck is a group of angry ghosts and a giant undead boss, and surrounding the ship is a literal horde of 40+ zombies. The monk's had her HP max reduced by half, the cleric's out of Channel Divinity, the wizard's disappeared into the ether, and Vyce is more concerned than he's ever been.

15. do they trust their party? why or why not?

Jo, for all that she's very outgoing and friendly, also isn't naive enough to completely trust people she's only just met. She trusts them for the moment, but she's also been taking care of herself since she was a child, so she's not at the point where she completely trusts them not to disappear when the going gets tough.

Against all odds, Vyce 80% trusts his party members, which is the most he's trusted anyone in a long time! There was an extremely traumatic incident in his past that really broke his trust in everything and everyone, so the fact that he trusts the party with his life (if not quite his secrets yet) after just an in-game month is absolutely huge for him.

40. do they enjoy poetry?

Jo doesn't mind oral poetry (she's not a big reader) as long as it isn't too long, because she has a very short attention span.

Vyce has honestly never considered poetry one way or the other. It just never factored into his life at any point, so he doesn't have any feelings for or against it.

#thanks jack! <3 #vyce larkling #jo kassend

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years ago

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Survey #388

“i wanna stay inside all day / i want the world to go away / i want blood, guts, and chocolate cake / i wanna be a real fake”

Name three people who you'll never forget: I doubt I'd forget Jason even if, God forbid, I had dementia. That's trauma for ya. I HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHLY doubt I could EVER forget my mom, either. In many different ways, she's literally kept me alive and has done so, so much for me. Then there's also Sara, whose friendship with me matches no one else I've been friends with. Have you ever been told you are fake? No. What was the name of the last pet of yours that died? Teddy, my dog. Do you like pineapple? I do. When was the last time you wished the day would just get over with? I know this sounds seriously depressing, but that's... pretty much every day. My life is just currently such a drag that being awake bores me senseless. But it's funny, because then some nights I stay up late for like... no reason. My existence alone is confusing. Is there any specific number that has any significance to you? No. Do you remember much from high school? I remember a lot from high school. Where would you go for the ultimate honeymoon? Isn't there a black sand beach in Iceland or something? Take me there, man. I'd also love to go to the Bahamas, but ew humidity and also I'm afraid of the Bermuda Triangle lmfao. If you had to get a tattoo tomorrow, what would you get? The big piece I want to get on my left upper arm; it's called "Denialism" by NukeRooster on deviantART. I got her permission forever ago to get it tattooed. Do you have any alarms set? What time and what for? Not currently. Have you ever had to work while there was a film crew at your work place? No. Have you ever supported anyone’s Kickstarter? If so, what was it? No. What do you like in your omelet? Ham pieces and cheese. Have you ever boycotted something? Yes: Chick-fil-A. Homophobic, transphobic pieces of shit aren't getting my business. Has anyone ever borrowed something from you, and not returned it? Yes. Most notably a video game I LOOOOVED as a kid. I was mad salty and still am lmao. Do you vent a lot on social media? God no, not anymore after embarrassing the everliving FUCK out of myself with a suicide note. What was your first bill you started paying on your own? I don't pay any bills bc unemployed. .-. Do you watch ASMR videos? No. What is your favorite charitable cause to donate to or volunteer for? The Trevor Project. Have you ever received a misdiagnosis? Yes. A psychiatrist I had in middle school thought I had ADHD, which was ABSOLUTELY ludicrous. Most recently, my long-time bipolar 2 diagnosis has been questioned, but I do think I have it. I think. Does it bother you when others don’t share the same religious beliefs as you? No? Freedom of religion is a thing. What was your last argument about? Ummmm... I don't remember. Probably something with Mom. Have you found your first gray hairs yet? No. Somehow. You'd think all the stress would have me pure gray by now, lol. What are the names of all the pets you’ve had? Dude, I've had WAY too many for this. What’s the most you’ve ever spent on a cosmetic or skincare product? *shrug* Who was the last person that invited you to go somewhere? Did you accept? Mom invited me to come with her to Nicole's to get out of the house because at the time our A/C was still out. I didn't want to go, even though damn did I suffer, haha. What was the last food item that you toasted, other than bread? That's... a great question. I don't know if I toast anything other than bread. Have you ever named any of your pets after a cartoon character? I remember I had a cat named Taz when I was younger. What was the last thing that someone else recommended, or suggested you try? My TMS doctor is like SUPER friendly and makes the treatment go by so fast (it's exactly 22 minutes and 30 seconds; don't ask why), and recently she was fangirling to Mom and me about the show Once Upon a Time, haha. I saw very little of it with Jason, but Mom did check it out. When was the last time you wore a hat? What kind? I have zero idea. When was the last time you ate a bowl of ice-cream? What flavour? Oh wow, it's been a long time. It was probably vanilla with chocolate syrup? If you menstruate, has your cycle ever synced with anyone close to you? Yes. Tell me something positive about the town or city that you live in. ... You said "positive," right? Did your parents have high expectations for you to excel in school and go to college/university? Yes. They were pretty serious about going to college when my sisters and I were younger, but they opened up to the concept that maybe it wasn't for all of us (coughmecough). Are you a polite person? I genuinely think I am. I definitely try to be. Have you ever been in a relationship where everything with your partner felt natural and effortless? Sigh. Yeah. Have you ever been in a relationship where everything was difficult and rocky? No. That's not the kind I'd stay in very long at all. I mean yes, there are always bumps, but there comes a point where you gotta say fuck nah and find something better. When you were a teenager, did your parents set rules about dating? Other than keeping age gaps in mind, no. Have you ever committed a crime that directly harmed another person? No. Did you grow up in an urban, suburban, or rural area? My childhood home was suburban, but leaned towards rural. We were on the very edge of the town. Which disease do you personally think is the most horrible? After seeing my mother suffer from borderline stage 4 ovarian cancer, I've gotta say cancer. My mother is the strongest person I know and yet she cried so frequently from chemotherapy. It broke my fucking heart. The person I copied the survey from mentioned especially childhood cancers, and I have to agree. Like just... why. "Everything happens for a reason." Bull. Fucking. Shit. Just TRY and convince me why a young child has to deal with CANCER. Do you remember where you first drove to after getting your license? I still don't have my license, as I've said in many a survey before. What did you get into trouble for the most when you were a kid? Being on the computer too much. What is your biological sex? Female. Do you use online dating? Or do you use another method for finding dates? Nah. I'm at the point in my life where I wanna let love just find me and not actively search for it. What is the oldest gaming console you own? We MIGHT still have our old Atari? If not, it'd be a GameBoy Advance. Which accents can you emulate pretty well? Just British. Do you think you'll ever manage to do everything you want to? No. But then again, I think that sounds pretty realistic? I doubt most people check off everything on their bucket list. What do you fear most? Probably becoming truly homeless, living on the streets. Do you wear shoes around the house? No. Are you a good driver? If you can't drive yet, do you think you'll be good? I mean, I'm not the worst in the world. My mom's always pointed out though that I ride on the brakes (which I do out of fear) and I tend to speed up and slow down quite a bit. I also stop kinda abruptly sometimes. What is/was your favorite thing about school? Seeing friends. What are you most likely to spend money on? My own personal money, tattoos, lol. Have you ever been a complete fangirl/fanboy over anything? @_@ Do you hate how, when the public like a celebrity, they overpublicize them? I feel bad for them, more than anything. You breathe wrong and suddenly it's news-worthy. It's like your every inconsequential action is under heavy surveillance and judgment, and it seems so unfair. Have you ever became attracted to someone you weren’t at first because their personality made you find them physically attractive? That was Jason for me. I never thought he was ugly, but regardless, he became THE most attractive man in the world to me. Have you ever worked in retail? Yes. -_- Are you even a little bit racist? Nah man, it's 2021, baby. Were you more fond of swings, monkey bars, or seesaws as a child? I was all about the swings. Do you believe in a near-future apocalyptic event? I don't know or care, honestly. A gamma ray or whatever they're called could incinerate us all tomorrow. A black hole could swallow the earth in an hour. We don't know. Do you have a chandelier in your home? No. Do you have a bar with stools? No. Is your Christmas tree faux or real? If faux, what color? We use a fake green one. Do you eat the crusts of your bread? Yes; it's the first part I eat. Which body type would you say you had? Did you know whales can survive on land? :^) Have you ever flown a kite? Yeah! I used to LOVE doing that with Dad as a kid when the field across our house wasn't in use (tobacco was grown there). What’s your preferred flavour of jam? I just like grape. What kind of animal did you last pet? My cat! Name a celebrity that you admire that nobody would expect you to: I massively admire Jeffree Star's work ethic. Do you prefer to shave or wax? Shave. I used to wax my eyebrows, but now I just don't care. Would you ever have sex in a public place? Uh, no. Do you think Jenna Marbles’ videos are funny? I've actually never watched her. Your favourite pasta dish: Just your normal spaghetti with meatballs. Strangest thing you’ve ever seen? Probably what I'm assuming was a star (but it was green???) flickering and then fizzling out of the sky kind of like some sort of backwards firework. I'd been watching it literally grow over a few nights, so when this happened, it was a big "?????? the fuck??????". It honestly scared me for some reason so I went inside after that. Aliens? I say aliens. Ever had a crush on somebody of the same sex? Yes. Has anybody ever called you a bastard? I don't think so. Who is the last person you ignored? uhhhhhhh Would you wear feathers in your hair? So actually, for my first prom, I wanted to wear a blue jay feather I had in my hair, reason being Jason's nickname from his parents was always "J Bird." It ended up not working out because we couldn't make it look natural with what we had. When was the last time you were well and truly scared? Hm. Favourite member of your favourite band: Ozzy, obviously, haha. Who’s your favourite female rapper? I don't have one.

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''teen idle'' by marina

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radramblog · 3 years ago

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Full-Art Lands Pt.2

Hello internet persons, this is Rad from 2/9/21 speaking. I am tired from an early early shift at work, and also just got the first vaccine dose, so I’m going to be posting these words written on Monday when I anticipated exactly this level of exhaustion. This might defeat the purpose of “a blog post a day”, but its hardly the first time I’ve done it and also I think I have a pretty solid excuse.

Anyway. This is a continuation of a discussion of every Full-Art Basic Land set in Magic: The Gathering, starting now with Modern Horizons. It counts!

Modern Horizons

Kind of cheating, because technically the Snow-Covered Lands are different cards, but unless you’re building around them (or a card like Extraplanar Lens) then they’re functionally pretty much the same. These are also literally the only Full-Art Snows, so if you’re running those then this is basically your only pimp option.

Ultimately these are kind of held back by the fact that, well, everything has to be blanketed in snow. There’s some interesting blues going along with the Plains and Mountain, and there’s some fun sky colours, but the remainder is left a little bland.

I currently believe these are worth investing in, for what it’s worth. Both Full-Art Lands and Snow Basics always go up eventually, slowly, over time, and these are still less than a dollar each for now.

Secret Lair: Artist Series: Seb McKinnon

This one is kind of a special case, because there’s just a Swamp. And there are technically two of them, but one is just an older version of the art. So I wasn’t sure whether or not to count these.

Because of these limitations, it’s hard to recommend these unless you have a lot of money and also a mono-black deck. They look great, matching Seb’s excellent style from the other cards in the drop, but it’s a bit of an awkward one. That said, I just have these sitting around, seeing as I got this drop just for the Damnation, so…might as well, I guess?

Theros: Beyond Death

Much like Amonkhet/Hour of Devastation, this set has one full-art mixed in with several regular basics. The difference is that these are representative of Nyx, the world of Theros’s gods, with its symbolic and nebulaic art.

There’s no real getting over the part where these just look like the Basic Energy cards from the Pokemon Trading Card Game. Considering WoTC’s hand in designing that game, and that the two are equivalent because, well, WotC designed them that way, it’s a fair comparison. But I don’t think this is why these ones aren’t as good as other full-arts. I have two main issues with these lands, and the first is that, well, there’s no land on them. For a set themed around a specific plane, one would expect that plane to be represented in the art, and Nyx does have actual landscapes on it. I get the space-themed design, but they could have been up in the sky above an actual Mountain or whatnot.

The other is the missed opportunity of these being Nebulae. That’s a fine enough design choice, though the symbology is a bit hammered in, but like. In a set based on Ancient Greece and its astronomical focus, with Gods that look like and are represented by constellations, with a mechanic called Constellation, they probably should have just been constellations. It would have made for a more subtle, less, well, Pokemon look, as well.

Unsanctioned

New Un-Set, new basics. These ones are kind of a hybrid between the Unglued and Unstable ones, with that golden frame and almost borderless design. I’m actually not sure how I feel about these, since while the frame looks nice, it’s also kind of pointless, and the texturing on the mana symbols is a little weird. I don’t like how smooth and reflective they are.

The art is at least still excellent. Not John Avon, but Adam Paquette does a great job distinguishing himself, less realistic but still believable places that feel fantasy. I actually feel like Unsanctioned was overall a miss, especially since each box came with like 2 of each of these basics, but that’s not something I’m holding against them.

Secret Lair: The Godzilla Lands

Secret Lair has been an opportunity for WotC’s designers to experiment a lot with card frames, though this set of basics doesn’t quite represent that. I’m not sure how well this one did, to be honest, though they did make future basic-only SLs, so fair enough I guess.

So, do you like Godzilla? Because he’s on all of these, along with some other Kaiju from the greater series canon. It’s kind of a little distracting, because the landscapes are otherwise gorgeous. Ironically, though, Godzilla himself is kind of being a scale-reptile in these pieces, giving a sense for just how big that mountain is, or how far away the “camera” is from the ground.

The only Island I see in that Island is Godzilla himself, though.

Double Masters

These are just a set of reprints from Unhinged and Battle for Zendikar, but in a more borderless style. I’m honestly not sure how I feel about the Unhinged arts being blown up like this. But this is a reprint set, and these are honestly kind of boring, so eh.

Zendikar Rising

Another Zendikar more lands etc. etc. you get the idea. Like the title suggests, this iteration of the plane has a lot of vertical exploration in its flavour, and the new basics reflect this. Especially in the Plains, Islands, and Mountains, that sense of adventure and traversal is back from the first Zendikar set.

Interestingly, this one doesn’t have any reprinted arts, unlike Battle for Zendikar, even though there’s only 3 of each land here. There’s probably something to be said about distancing this set from BFZ- that set faced a fair bit of backlash, and it is thematically very different from ZNR. There’s also the conspicuous absence of the Hedrons, apparently having been replaced in art and in flavour by the Skyclaves. No, I still don’t know what those actually are supposed to be.

At the end of the day, these cards do end up making Zendikar feel like it’s lost its edge a little. They’re just a bit too bright and friendly for my liking, even with the inclement conditions in some of the images. I think it literally just might be the clear, bright skies in this one.

Secret Lair: The Unfathomable Crushing Brutality of Basic Lands

Yeah these are about as edgy as the name suggests. Monochromatic and striking, this set of basic’s iconography is much more evocative than literal, the mood of the colours in their themes, captured largely without them.

It does greatly amuse me that literally all of these arts contains skulls. Talk about gothic. I like these a lot better than the Theros: Beyond Death lands, despite the similarities- Particularly, that the mana symbols aren’t literally just the standard ones- arguably the Island is, but it at least is in the form of negative space.

I can’t get over how thematic these are. Plains embodies community with its weapons and runes and roots, and the human face on the Sun icon. Island represents the vastness of knowledge with its endless waters and starred skies. Swamp is death, skeletons mired in the depths of the surroundings. Mountain is fire, bold and unflinching, while Forest’s gnarled branches running through the skull shows the unflinching nature of, well, nature. They’re all so utterly sick.

Innistrad: Midnight Hunt

The most recent addition to this list, and one you actually can’t get yet. I think the frames on these being so thin is excellent, since it means they aren’t taking away from the spectacle of the art- not to mention the monochrome of the border and art.

These pieces are magnificent gothic landscapes, the kind you’d expect to see illustrated on the inside cover of Frankenstein or a Lovecraft story. Each and every one of them is ominous in its own special way, with the Swamp that’s a ruined river town to the rugged cliffside path of (presumably) Geier Reach. And the Island with the waves crashing across the cliffs is utterly gorgeous.

Obviously we haven’t seen these in paper quite yet. And the monochrome may make it difficult to tell them apart at a glance. But these are sacrifices I am willing to make for the sake of style.

This is the sum total of all the FABs. For now. Something I didn’t quite realise when writing this was the sheer number of options for this kind of pimping, and how much they’ve ramped up in production over the last few years. Much like with the increase in cards in general, I suppose, as well as premium product versions like the Secret Lairs. I would be genuinely shocked if the game ever exclusively started using Full-Arts, but I’d also not be surprised if we saw them yearly at the longest.

Either way, I’m sticking with my BfZ lands, because those are the ones I already have!

#ramble #mtg #basic lands

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nilim · 5 years ago

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How would someone start to get into LARPing? I've always thought it sounded interesting but I have no idea where to start.

Oh boy, both a very easy and a very complicated question, because it depends on where you live and what you want. Also I haven’t been to that many different LARPs, so I will keep this mostly general…. This got long, so tips under the cut:

I’m very much a ‘jumped in the deep end without any preparation and see where I end up’ kinda person. I first started LARPing when I was 18. It was a ‘smaller’ LARP and it was at a place where my brother also LARPed at, although I didn’t see him for the entire weekend so I was pretty much alone. It was also an ‘adult’ LARP, so 16+ only. It was also the most I laughed in a 3-day stretch of time and absolutely delightful.

Basically, anyone can get into LARPing, you just have to keep an open mind when going into these things. Here’s a disclaimer though: I’m an easy person, I don’t have any disabilities, was in a mentally healthy state and I’m very used to camping outdoors, so I could put up with a lot - there was nothing that really ‘scared’ me about going except the whole ‘oh no strangers’ and mild social anxiety thing. Therefore, I didn’t do a lot of research beforehand about which LARP I wanted to attend - I attended my first LARP because it was relatively close to where my parents lived and I knew my brother LARPed there. That’s it.

However, that was more than 10 years ago and I’ve since grown a little more socially anxious and also a little more socially aware, so I would advise you to scout out different LARPs in your area. Almost all LARP events I know of have an online presence, through twitter or facebook groups, websites, etc. Just have a look what players are saying on those pages - you can usually judge the general feel of a LARP by the type of discussions players are having.

Also, ask questions if you’re unsure about something. In general I’ve found that LARPers are very eager to bring people into their hobby, and are very helpful and honest when answering questions. Check whether there is a code of conduct. Check whether there are confidential counselors present if anything were to happen. Check whether there are rules about harassment etc. If you’re unsure about something, ask the players on those social media pages what their experiences have been. Usually they will be honest, because they are ‘customers’ of the LARP much like you will be. Treat it like you’re shopping around for a hotel or holiday! Weigh the pros and cons.

As for the LARPs themselves, there are many different kinds of LARPs. I’ve only done high fantasy LARPs so far, and pretty large ones as well. Conquest of Mythodea is the largest LARP in the world, and it can be overwhelming for some people. But I also find them very calming in a way? When there’s so many people around there is almost no direct pressure on me to do anything. The story will continue regardless of what I do. With small LARPS or ‘parlor’ LARPs, which usually consist of a very limited group in a much smaller area, there can be more pressure on you to ‘perform’ your role. However, the upside of these LARPs is that you get some very deep RP and your character is important to the story. The game leaders will make sure to focus on you, and that can be very exciting!

I’ve also only attended LARPs where I would stay overnight. My first LARP lasted 3 days (Friday-Sunday), and Conquest of Mythodea lasts 5 (Wednesday -Sunday night). If you’re unsure about immediately going for such a commitment, maybe try out shorter or smaller LARPs first to see if you like it? Also, almost all LARPs have out-of-character areas, so if things get too overwhelming you can retreat from the game and just chill. Usually there are dedicated areas in the game, as well as your personal areas (e.g. people’s personal tents are completely off limits in Conquest, and nobody may enter them except for you. They may also not demand that you come out, etc).

Once you’ve settled on a LARP you want to attend, but don’t want to do it alone, you can ask around to see if there are any groups that might interest you in joining. Most LARPs have many different factions that you could join, and a lot of larger LARPs also have newbie groups that are specifically designed to teach you the ropes of the game. We joined the banner of explorers in Conquest of Mythodea and people were very friendly with explaining rules and such to us. However, they also usually let you go off and do your own thing if you’re not interested in participating or being forced into performing faction-related things. It was real nice. Again, ask around, see which groups of people can take you under their wing - usually there’s a lot of people willing to help you! A lot of this asking around you can do online before you even attend the LARP.

Once you’ve chosen a LARP and/or even a faction, make sure to read up on the rules of the LARP. Sometimes there’s a lot. Nobody is expecting you to know everything by heart, but it’s appreciated to take a little bit of effort so you know the general rules, especially around OOC vs IC gameplay, and the concept to roleplay with other people. LARPing is very much a “Yes and…” kind of experience, much like D&D. Prevent shutting down other people’s RP moments just because you want to do something cooler. (Note: Absolutely shut down somebody’s RP moment if it is making you uncomfortable. You are more important than RP!). Read up on combat rules, if you’re planning on taking part in combat. Make sure never to just hit people on the head, never carry sharp objects on you, make sure to know the rules about touching and grabbing other people, some LARPs don’t allow it.

Now you just need a character. Many LARPs have you build a character much in the same way like you would build a D&D character; you have a number of skill points that you can assign to different skills, such as thievery, magic or hitpoints. Read up on the rules and do whatever you think would be fun. In my general experience, these skill points are way less important than you think. 99% of LARP is just hanging around and talking to people, and you don’t need skill points for that. Additionally, realize that nobody actually knows your character (unless you’re playing a small parlor LARP), so you can usually tweak your character while you’re playing. So far I’ve always tried to play shady thief characters or dumb fighter characters, but I always instantly get sucked in when there’s puzzles and mysteries to solve, so I often let the ‘stoic person who doesn’t care about books’ thing go as soon as the game presents me with secret puzzles and coded texts. And that’s fine. Just make sure that once you’ve settled as a character after some time IC, and people know you as that character, you roleplay somewhat consistently or otherwise it gets confusing.

As for preparation for going to an actual LARP: There’s a lot of good resources out there on the internet! Just google things like ‘essential items for a LARP’ or ‘packing list LARP’, especially if you’re planning on camping. There’s also a huge amount of online stores that cater to LARP outfits, LARP weapons, and adjacent fantasy setting camping items. If you’re on a budget, don’t worry about it - nobody is going to be snobby about your outfit if you don’t look as cool as the next guy. However, please do try to keep it setting-compliant. Don’t show up in jeans and a t-shirt to a fantasy LARP. Even on a budget, it’s relatively easy to find some second-hand clothes at a thrift store or flea market (that’s where I get half my LARP clothes). Much like many hobbies, this one too requires a little bit of investment on your part before you go. Please don’t splurge on equipment before you’ve even attended a LARP though – maybe you won’t like it, and then you’ve invested all that effort already. Just take it easy and test out the waters a little bit.

And in-game? What if you’re unsure about how to get into the game? First you have to realize that everything is game. Even just sitting around the campfire enjoying some bard songs is game. There’s no right or wrong way to play in a LARP. But if you want to get into more plot-related stuff: Talk to others. Ask questions, about everything. During our 5 days at Mythodea this summer we did literally nothing but walk up to random places or events, tapping random people on the shoulder and going ‘what’s happening here?’. And people will do it a lot with you too, we’ve had so many people asking us who someone was, or what was going on, even though we didn’t know. Be not afraid to ask questions. It’s the quickest way to make new connections and get new friends and to get involved in the plot. Usually there’s NPCs around that you can ask for quests. Try to find out where stuff is happening. Or make your own quests, if you enjoy making that kind of character. It can be a lot of fun to send out other players to do things for you. Player characters come in all kinds of flavours. Maybe you just want a character that hangs out in the camp and cooks for people. That’s fine too! Like I said before, there’s no right or wrong to play.

If you want to fight undead and smash people with a foam sword, there’s LARPs for that. If you want to solve a murder mystery in a haunted mansion, there’s LARPs for that. If you want to be a wizard and attend magic school, there’s LARPs for that. If you want to sneak around and steal people’s valuables, there’s LARPs for that. It’s great! Just look around and see what kind of LARP and what kind of character suits your style. And it’s also fine to have your first LARP be a run-of-the-mill fantasy setting where you just walk around and observe other people and don’t get involved in the plot at all, which is mostly what I did during my first LARP.

Anyway, this got very long, sorry. But I hope these tips help you out!

#LARP #Anonymous

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goblinconceivable · 4 years ago

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Still puffs of wind

Part 2 of me looking at Hooked Queen in season 7. Relatively happy with where I got so far, so a little course correct, mopping up and going a bit fanon/shippy eyes. Also I made a huge error, I admit my embarrassment to the world and it makes me less embarrassed.

Still referring to Wish!Hook as Rogers.

I screwed up badly by being careless and imposing my own reading, and I hate when I do that. In the family-reunites scene after Gothel is defeated, Alice is staring at Rogers, and he’s looking at her. She CAN’T run and hug him, end the enforced distance contrasts with all the inter-hugging that happens through the rest of the scene. More importantly for my purposes, Robin is looking at him too, for the entirety of that shot. She turns and comforts Alice in the next, but we’re still looking at a tentative continuation of a family unit comprised of Alice/Robin/Rogers we started when Robin asked for his blessing and happy hugging immediately commenced, and just formalized when the three joined hands.

More damaging to my case is that Tiana totally went to speak to Rogers, and I believe was holding his hand for a moment. It’s very background, which is why I missed it the first (um, few) times until I looked for it. It’s validation that the extended family unit in the Enchanted Forest was a real thing, and that means: inclusionary. It’s a payoff for the few Rogers/Tiana moments we got under the curse, because curse-relationships are weirdly close to the uncursed-relationships, so we can assume they really are friends. It also supports an unrequited crush interpretation*, because Rogers approaches Tiana, which isn’t so much his MO. See later point.

Net result: in this scene his inclusion outweighs exclusion.

I do still think it’s notable that Henry and Regina and Ella and Lucy end up ignoring him. Scene-wise, it makes sense. It’s a blocking disaster to have anyone running over there, and core nuclear family runs to each other first. Yes they could have had Rogers still standing, but I think it WAS a stronger choice to have him physically removed, to remind us that he’s not alright, and that his curse isn’t just separating him from his daughter but from everyone.

Hyper-focused on finding his daughter, he is barely capable of forming relationships with anyone else. And we get to see this emotional distancing manifested! On a gurney, he literally cannot approach anyone, he observes from afar.

This contrasts heavily with Regina, who’d the most huggy of all. She’s with Henry, she greets Robin, and then the scene finishes with Regina/Lucy. We’re left with three couples in relationships, plus Regina/Lucy. Rogers and Rumple remain odd ducks, only Rumple’s on a quest and has left. So they’ve tidily avoided setting Regina and Rogers together. Which... was a major theme. Keeping them apart. Was it a creator’s choice in order to avoid shipping? Did they not think they could write them in scenes and maintain a platonic friendship? Did they just not think it was important to show?

In a show about family, and a Regina who’s heart is open wide enough to mentor a random girl she meets (Drizella), why avoid giving her an interesting relationship with the reboot of a character that a) can play against the relationship she had with the original, b) who has a history with her That We’ve Seen and c) she’s known for 10 years and has massive screen time and development so it’s not like “Tiana’s a secondary character we can limit her interactions because of that.”

It’s that enforced disinterest that provides the negative space for speculation and fanon. But it’s frustrating. I don’t know what to do with it. I’m left wondering if a huge sense of the Rogers!exclusion isn’t just down to Regina. Who plot-wise was scattered but was the heart of the season. What would be different if she’d checked in on him, how he was getting on with Tilly? If he’d continued meeting Henry in the bar and she had to balance playing along with them while running a bigger picture?

(I sort of forgot about Lucy. Does she even HAVE a scene with Rogers? Lucy is, like Henry in the first 6 seasons, the glue of the family. She is open love. She and Tiana are tight in cursed-world. But Rogers is practically an uncle, he’s known her since she was born. And nada.)

Which feeds in to a/the reading that his failure to join the table with Charming et al is his own sense of exclusion rather than anything else. Charming extending his hand isn’t an outreach on behalf of the family, it’s standard fare for the family, and Rogers hasn’t considered it an option. Having been rebuffed by Regina and Henry probably didn’t help though. But looking at that again narratively: it wasn’t personal on Henry’s part, in fact he knows Rogers well enough to know he needs to defy him, and respects him enough to believe that he COULD have stopped him.

And now, our technically non-canon scene hinting at the crown. Which is inclusionary, which means progress. The open hand remains open on the part of the family, and Rogers has accepted. Our Alice/Robin/Rogers unit is tight, and his friendship with Henry remains quite strong. I mean, Henry literally stops his mad rush to confirm with Rogers that he got the thing. It’s important that Rogers knows, just so that he knows. Satisfying his investment in the process, and cementing him as one of the ones who are not just aware of the event, but are at the heart of creating this moment -for Regina-.

Which, to sidetrack, is both beautiful and weird. It was an election, did Regina even know she was running? All indication was that everything happened behind the scenes and all the Realms just sort of quietly agreed they wanted her and then, SURPRISE! What would have happened if she didn’t want the gig? Being part of a council is quite different than “Hi you get to run it all now.” I mean, she dropped being mayor to live in a forest

I guess the only thing left is to finally land squarely on Rogers/Regina. Which... still doesn’t fall out of canon for me, even including the crown moment. It does add flavouring for Rogers to be invested not just in the event everyone is pulling together for, but for Regina personally. Ie, there’s something special about that crown, some special connection to Regina? Which she doesn’t mention and isn’t mentioned, so it’s very obscure for the uber!fan or the whole quest for it makes no sense and that’s why the scene was cut?

But his interest in Regina for her sake is new. Generally we saw her reaching out to him - when he was watching Henry/Ella/Baby!Lucy, when he was attacked by his heart when seeing Alice for the first time, when she told him to reach out to Tilly. With his curse broken, now he can accept and give love more generally, so at the very least we get an extension and deeping of whatever baseline we ascribe to their previous reationship.

And while I’m all about plationic male/female relationships, the best way for the writers to do that is to have GIVEN them a platonic relationship. In the relative void we have open-ended potential, where happily neither has been pining for the other, because that’s just sad. But where Regina’s efforts and support can be reciprocated and love birthed from that. Which is where I’m at, and probably where I end, for meta, the rest is fanfiction ~!

*The possible/probable crush Rogers had on Tiana doesn’t bother me because it counts as a safe space. She was firmly placed with someone else in canon, and it’s natural to gravitate to someone gentle and friendly, especially when you’re socially inept. So really what it says about him is he does want to reach out and part of him does want a more intimate relationship, but he wouldn’t with Regina because she’s intimidating. Complete matriarch. You can’t crush on her, you lowkey love her and don’t notice until it could be a thing.

#OUaT #Hooked Queen #meta #captain hook #regina mills

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passionate-baker · 6 years ago

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Italian Adventures Part I: Florence

Friends, welcome to Part I of our Italian Adventures: Florence!

I’m so excited to share this travel guide with you! It has been such a long time in the making and I’m dying to tell you about all of our favourite places in the Tuscan capital.

Let me just start with this statement: we adore Italy. If Italophile is a word - which google has led me to believe it could be - then Boyfriend & I would definitely be described as such. We love the vibe, the food, the wine, the museums, the language, the atmosphere, the gelato, everything. This is the case for Italy as a whole, yes - but Florence in particular has something that other Italian cities just can’t compare with.. and I’m not just talking about the world’s best cheesecake - but there’s more on that below.

There’s a huge amount of recommendations in this post. I’ve streamlined the recs into six sections: Stay / Coffee / Eat / Drink / Museums + Attractions / Places to See. The first four are self-explanatory, but the difference between the last two sections is an entry fee; Museums + Attractions are all paid entrance, while the Places to See are free. If you have any doubts about any of the places listed below, just know that we’ve been to each & every single place a whole bunch of times (some an embarrassingly large amount of times), so you know you can actually trust us when we say they’re reliable.

Happy travelling, friends!

STAY

Leonardo House // we’ve stayed at Leonardo House on our last two visits to the city, and - unless we win the lottery and splurge on a fancy hotel - we’ll definitely be returning again! It has an amazing location, it’s extremely budget friendly, and the manager is so so lovely. It’s more of a hostel than anything else, so it’s more pared back than what you might be looking for, but the private rooms are clean and quiet. Honestly, it’s the location that has us returning time after time - it is literally less than a three minute walk straight into the centre of the Duomo complex - what more could you ask for?

COFFEE

Caffe Gilli // we have a copy of Ruth Orkin’s fabulous American Girl in Italy photograph & I’d wanted to visit the spot it was taken in since the first moment I saw it. That place is Caffe Gilli. We were so far from disappointed upon walking in the doors that we went back for our morning hit every. single. day. and then some. Pro tip: drink your coffee & eat your pastry at the bar, it costs much less! .. and before you ask: yes, we tried to capture our own take of the iconic photo, and also: no, you cannot see it. A must-visit.

La Rinascente // to be honest, I can’t actually remember what the coffee is like in Rinascente - but that isn’t why you should go there anyway. The cafe boasts a rooftop terrace - La Terrazza - that has a breathtaking view over the Duomo complex. It is the ultimate place for a romantic coffee date. Shout-out to Boyfriend’s parents for recommending!

EAT

4Leoni // we are obsessed with 4Leoni. It is hands down our favourite restaurant in Florence, and we have been back an embarrassing amount of times. The food is always impeccable, the location is stunning, the staff are extremely friendly, it doesn’t cost an arm and a leg, and it’s home to the best baked cheesecake the world has ever seen. I’m not even exaggerating a little bit. A definite must-visit.

Il Santo Bevitore // okay fine, we are also mildly obsessed with IlSB, and have returned a few times now. The food is always exceptional, and there is a level of perfection & professionalism about the place that 4Leoni can’t quite compare with. The menu is inventive, unusual - on our last visit there was a strong Japanese influence to the meals - and leaves us wowed every time. Our most recent culinary highlights included: an n’duja pasta starter that left Boyfriend drooling, & a mouth-wateringly thick steak that was cooked to absolute perfection. Another must-visit.

Trattoria Giovanni // I can’t remember exactly what led us to this restaurant, but we had an unexpectedly fantastic meal. The atmosphere wasn’t as comfortable as either 4Leoni or Il Santo Bevitore, but the place can’t be faulted on the food. We shared a delicious cheese board to start, and had two absolutely perfect pasta dishes for mains - braised beef cheek for him, and wild boar for me. Overall, a surprisingly good find.

O’Munaciello // pizzeria in the Oltrarno. A large, quirky room decorated with fairy lights, candles, and puppets. A real no frills place, but the pizza is reliably good and not too expensive.

La Carraia Gelato // our favourite gelato in city, and arguably the best of the bunch. We are repeat visitors and are forever opting for our fave flavours: nocciola & pistacchio - so. good.

DRINK

Il Santino // extra chic wine bar connected to Il Santo Bevitore. An amazingly tiny space with a small handful of tables clustered together & stools lining the bar. The room is dark & moody, the vibe casual & hipster. The menu is minuscule and sans prices, but after a brief chat with our extremely knowledgeable waitress, we were brought the custom made charcuterie & cheese board of our dreams. We lingered over our tiny table with our various glasses of wine - which were paired with our food by our waitress - for as long as was socially acceptable. If you read our Edinburgh Guide, the place has the same kind of feel as Smith & Gertrude (but so much nicer and friendlier). We loved every single second, a definite must-visit.

La Ménagere // I’ll be honest, I only wanted to visit LM because of the powers of Instagram. I saw it on my feed, I loved the style, & I had to see it for myself. The space itself is beautiful, and it melted my insta-eyes as soon as we reached the door. Initially, I had to drag Boyfriend inside - he isn’t as easily influenced as I - but once we spied the cocktail list, peace was restored. An ice cold margarita served in a silver chalice for me, an old fashioned garnished with shavings of chocolate for him. They were, honestly, the best cocktails of our entire lives. Win-win!

5 e Cinque // one night, after dinner in 4Leoni - which is literally a stone’s throw away - we wandered in here for a glass of wine. We enjoyed two glasses of the most delicious Sangiovese ever, for an incredibly reasonable price. Although we had just eaten, everything on the dinner menu sounded so enticing that we vowed to return.

Bulli & Balene // the perfect spot for an Aperol Spritz. I think we went to B&B every single day we were in Florence. Both as a pre- & post-dinner at 4Leoni drink, as an afternoon pick-me-up, as a “hey, that place was nice!” stop-off on a wander around town, as a perfect spot to people-watch over a glass or two, you name it. Added bonus: drinks are excellent value!

Archea Brewery // we love wine & all - don’t get us wrong - but sometimes you just need a good beer, and this is the place for that. We visit every time we’re in the city & have yet to leave disappointed. Think dark cavernous room with a cozy atmosphere and a relaxed vibe. Pro tip: go for the own brand lager, it’s delicious! A beer lover’s must-visit.

Antica Sosta degle Aldobrandini // a perfect people-watching spot. Small bar, cheap food, located across the road from the Medici Chapel, with cold Becks in fridge. We’ll take two, thanks.

MUSEUMS + ATTRACTIONS

Santa Maria del Fiore Complex // obviously, everyone visits the complex for one reason: the Duomo. The Cathedral itself is breathtakingly beautiful & probably worth some of your precious time, but definitely don’t miss the chance to climb the Duomo. If you’re an art history nerd like me, be sure to check out the Duomo Museum at the back of the complex - amongst other things, they have Michelangelo’s Florentine Pieta (!), and an exact replica of Ghiberti’s Gates of Paradise that you can actually look at without being hassled by hundreds of tourists. Pro tip: buy your ticket for the complex (you have to by an all-in-one ticket) the day before you plan to climb the Duomo; that way you can beat the majority of the queues by getting there before the ticket office opens for the day. For sure, a must-visit.

Uffizi // like the Louvre, this is one of those museums that you just can’t miss. It’s home to some wonderful pieces of art by the greats: Botticelli, Da Vinci, Caravaggio etc, the list is endless. It always takes longer to work through the circuitous layout than expected, so be sure to allow extra time.

Accademia // obviously, when in Florence, you have to visit Michelangelo’s masterpiece: David... or more specifically speaking, you have to go marvel at that perfectly sculpted specimen of man. I made several return trips around the pedestal just to fully appreciate how beautiful he is. And to check out his butt, of course. Wowza.

Boboli Gardens // although undeniably beautiful in their own right, we only bought tickets into the gardens for one reason: the Buontalenti Grotto. The grotto is at the end of the Vasari Corridor - which I’ve never had the opportunity to visit but would absolutely love to - & is honestly like something straight out of my imagination. We stood outside the gates staring in for an embarrassing amount of time - the sculptures inside are beyond amazing.

PLACES TO SEE

Loggia dei Lanzi // my favourite sculpture in the entire world - The Rape of the Sabine Women by Giambologna - is located in the Loggia, not a stone’s throw from the Uffizi. Basically, the Loggia is a free, open-air sculpture gallery filled with unmissable pieces of art. Whenever we visit, I stand mesmerized under Giambologna’s masterpiece before moving on to gawp at Cellini’s selfie in the back of Perseus’s helmet. For me, this is a total must-visit.

Palazzo Michelangelo // everyone recommends walking up here and it is easy to see why: you get to see beautiful Firenze from on high! The bridges spanning the width of the winding Arno, the red rooftops capping the city, the Duomo. Pro tip: head up there super early to avoid the crowds... or brave the crowds & go for that magical time right before the sun sets.

Fiesole // we actually have Boyfriend’s mom to thank for telling us all about the small hilltop village of Fiesole, about a 20-minute bus ride out of the city. The bus ticket was super cheap (like, €1.50), and the journey alone was worth it - it takes these winding roads out of the city going up, up, up, leaving you gaping out the window at the views of Florence below. The village is adorable, and very quiet in comparison to the busy streets of Firenze. We hiked up towards the Monastery of San Francesco to get that view over Florence. Perfection!

Palazzo Stozzi // a breathtakingly beautiful space in the heart of the city. Used largely as an exhibition space - when we visited they were just about to start a Marina Ambrovic show - but open to the public to walk around.

Bremen, Germany // Paris, France // Amsterdam, Holland // Copenhagen, Denmark // Cork, Ireland // Edinburgh, Scotland // Westport, Ireland // Barcelona, Spain // Munich, Germany // Vienna, Austria // London, UK i - ii - iii

#florence #italy #travel

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