#to just teaching them something along the line of sometimes you dont get what you want??
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sometimes I find myself disagreeing with some popular take on something and then I wonder if I have a point or if I'm just being a bitch
#for example I dont like this rise in giving kids gifts when their sibling has something#like I know its meant to show them they're still cared about but like. what happened#to just teaching them something along the line of sometimes you dont get what you want??#I see this at the shop as well the elder sibling needs glasses and then the younger one who doesnt need them#throws a fit because they also want a pair#and I hate it everytime when my coworker steps in an gives the kid something seemingly just to placate them#idk call me old fashioned but sometimes the day ain't fucking about you idk what else to tell you.#like what if its not even their sibling are you going to give them a gift everytime a friend of theirs has their bday as well?#in this economy???#I hope you're rich then#how about instead we teach kids how to cope with feelings of disappointment#cause one of the truths of life is that its going to fucking disappoint in one way or another
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Slashers with an s/o who has tourettes? (Billy Lenz, Stu/Billy, Brahms, Bubba and any Sinclair would be nice)
Can do😌 they/them pronouns, sfw, lil mension of bullies but slashers gonna whoop them Request open
Slashers with s/o who has tourette syndrom
Brahms Heel
Our gentleman knows how to behave
He won't comment on it, or stare, anything
He might be curious and ask few questions but very respectfully
10/10 good boi, nothing bad
Billy Lenz
Thrue phone when he called first time he thought that they are making fun of him!!
He never heard of tourettes so he thinks s/o is just build difrent
He probably found out about it by overhearing converstation s/o had about it with somone
Cant take it seriously, untill they are in relationship or close friends with him?? Its not like he's disrespectful due to tourettes, he just do be like that, to everyone
Will ask weird questions
Bubba Sawyer
Hes so understanding! And supportive
If they have one of those tics that acually feel uncomfortable or painful he gonna feel bad after finding out :(
And s/o has to teach him about it, but even before they told him, he was very respectful
He gonna be soso upset if his family is rude to them! Dont lisen to them! Your great
This babi has stims when overwhelmed so he completly gets how it feels (to certain degree ofc)
Vincent Sinclaie
Our king
He gonna give them space if they need it, he also will think that touretts makes them original and more memorable
If s/o has ticks while they get stressed he gonna try to remove all possibly stressful factors in the room
At start everytime s/o had one of those tics when you move your neck or shoulders, vincent thought they were flinching because of him😭😭bbg thought s/o was spooked of him
Bo Sinclair
At the start he gonna be like "what the helllll" but then he remembers, ah yes, touretts, that exists
Gonna beat anyone up, their friends making jokes? Boom! Rude random people that stare? Shmack! Anyone making fun of it its on deadlist
Extremely protecive. Yes he sometimes finds some tics funny (especialy if s/o randomly swears) but he won't mimic them or comment on it much (unless s/o is okay with that ofc)
Hes like, yeah i can make fun of it, but if somone else tries laughing welp their dead
Stu Macher and Billy Loomis
Stu cant be serious if his life depended on it
Again, its okay to joke about it in close group of friends, but if anyone random tries to comment on it, baby they are the next vicim😍
Billy is more protective while Stu just lets s/o handle the situation (unless its really bad)
Tbh Billy is worried about s/o acidently hurting themselfs, like accidental cuts while s/o prepares dinner or hitting something with a hand. So he doesnt really like them walking around with a knife. While Stu, yknow Stu, he just hopes they wont bleed out
Also ghostfaces are dumb, 100% stu would say something along the lines "dont worry hon my perents are rich they gonna get you some vaccine for that" 💀💀💀 "STU YOU DUMBASS ITS NOT AN ILLNES HOW DIDNT YOU KNOW THAT"
#slasher x reader#slasher headcanons#billy lenz#billy lenz x reader#brahms heelsire#brahms x reader#stu matcher imagine#stu matcher x reader#ghostface x reader#billy loomis x reader#bo sinclair x reader#bo sinclair#vincent sinclair x reader#vincent x reader#vincent sinclair#house of wax#scream#bubba saywer x reader
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can we have more tim and pony friendship cause i love them (also do you think curtis gang would be shocked tim has a little alliance with pony or what)
i permit more tim and pony interactions☝🏽☝🏽☝🏽
BUT BEFORE I START YES!!! they r a lil shocked bc its like, “we barely understand u and curly, but how the fuck did u and tim strike a bond, yall have like nothing in common what could u possibly b talking about together”
ANYWAYS onto the hcs<33
•pls dont let angela, tim, and pony meet all together, some sort of teasing will come curlys way</33, especially if fir whatever reason theyre having a random family game night
•sometimes when pony draws curly, he feels like it looks more like tim and just adds the scar, and if pony leaves it out, tim takes a quick peek inside
•he can tell some features of it r more so curlys, but hes flattered nonetheless
• tims a bit of a dickhead, he likes scaring pony a tad bit😭
•tim used to joke to curly that when he smashed their heads together for that chicken dare, he shouldve just made them kiss instead so curly could shut up about pony in the future, and now since theyre together he jokes about it to pony
•pony sometimes is a liiitttllleeee spy for tim, nothin too big rlly, only things concerning curly
•please guys,,,, tim teaching pony some defensive moves,,,,he knows pony and him dont fight the same way, so tim helps by at least helping pony buy himself some times in fights
•tim makes sure pony eats SOMETHING before he leaves the house
•to this day, tim will never rlly tell pony just why the hell he was on the couch that day, he says thats for him to know
•tims realized that he doesnt rlly see pony flirt w curly so the wingman that he is, he pulls pony to the side and is like “here give curly this” or he tells pony to say something to curly, something along those lines, just to get the ball rollin
•i like to imagine that sometimes tim sees some random white family on the cover and teases pony (and darry and soda but shhh they aint here rn) that thats his family right there
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dw for being honest. and yes I get the same ick feeling sometimes when reading certain idols nsfw posts but its still inruiging because in a way it reflect how he performs on stage. same i dont know if id get along with seungmin or lee know even as a scorpio i find them a bit too hit or miss like ur not quite sure what version u would get if u were going to meet them. but im sure theyre nice just to have a conversation with and i bet theyve got loads of thoughts on varying topics that they maybe are unable to discuss with others and such yh i love chans talent and his producing skills is amazing just maybe not in the sexual producing sense haha.
i also kinda get the feeling that he is much more comfortable or skilled with performing but u would kind of have to teach him things outside of what he does in the idol world cause i think idols in general rely so much on staff that they might not know much else besides what they do they might have an interest in something else but u would have to instruct them a lot bc in the idol world they kinda kept in their own bubble so to speak. for instance maybe cooking or yknow domestic stuff like that. i think the same about mingi and how he would suit someone whos wealthy yet skilled enough to take care of him.
if possible can u do only for the older members of skz would they want kids if so how many? cause I cant imagine basicslly having to lead 7 other kids then later on bangchan would still want his own but i still think he would be a great father maybe just not right now in this current time period cause he would still want to do his idol activities as long as he can.
Yeah i get what you mean with that hit or miss with lee know and Seungmin. Even tho Lee Knows my second bias after Changbin😂
And the thing about the idols needing teaching and assistance/guidances is actually very on point i have noticed that before in some idols. Not necessarily with skz but just in general. It must have its effect being closed up in a very limited world from your teen or even childhood years and having so much of your life being watched snd controlled and having things done and given to you etc. Im not necessarily getting that feeling with chan but im getting it a bit with Changbin, i think this may also be because of him growing so filthy rich, i remember him saying recently that he has NEVER went grocery shopping alone. Excuse me what?!🥲
Anyways here's the reading, it was very fun and interesting actually i love having a look into such topics🥰 i hope you enjoy it too.
Deck used is the 3rd Eye Tarot🌼🌸
*for entertainment purposes only!
Skz Hyung-Line do they want Kids? How many?
Chan - Knight of Cups, Page of Swords, The Empress, 5 of Pentacles
Wow ok so chan does want kids and he wants to have kids a lot and he wants many at that! His poor, poor wife. Im seeing like 4-5 little buggers😂
Lee Know - Page of Cups, The Hierophant, Ace of Wands
Lee know doesn't seem too eager and wants to keep him and his wife (partner) and their love young. The decision would be probably more in the hands of his wife (im just gonna use that as im seeing very clearly a woman being presented in the energy) as he doesn't mind having a childless mariage. As i said he would love having the extra time with his wife to keep themselves young and explore new hobbies and the world and themselves. But if it came up to it and his wife made a conscious choice of having a child they they would probably have just one.
Changbin - 3 of Pentacles, 8 of Wands
Changbin wants 3 and he wants them quick. I feel like he would love to have girls, probably all 3 of them being girls. I think he would find it really cool if they were triplets or something. Or their first being twins and the third little one being their little sis or brothers and so everyone of their children feels supported and protected among themselves too with the oldest ones having each other and the younger one having their sisters. I also get the feeling that his swimmers are also very potent🌝 so a pregnancy might come unexpected actually. He would love to keep it tho. He really really want to have children quick and fast (if its with the person he loves). Its like he can't wait to already settle down in his family life. I might just be picking on his soul tho, idk if his conscious self is currently on the same wavelenght😅 Oh and i think he would be a very devoted father and want to spend lots of time with his kids and teach them things, and go explore and have adventures with them and have them teach him new things like slang, and what happened at school and how Amanda got pink highlights or whatever😂 like middle school tea yk. He would love that!
Hyunjin - 6 of Cups, Ace of Pentacles
For hyunjin im seeing just one kid. He doesn't seem too eager for kids but he's open to it and sees it as something thats just part of life and being an adult. I think he would be good with his child too, but it will be more of a calmer dynamic and i think it might be a bit of a struggle to actually get that kid. Maybe it would be a while or the acquiring of the child will be a long and tiring process, like maybe something like adoption. I actually see him with an older child too, like him giving something to an older child thats already like 3-7ish. And i also feel the vibe of him being alone with that kid, as in his partner isn't there with him. Kind of explains the calm, devote of excitement energy. I don't feel very comfortable getting into that to be honest so im just gonna leave it as it is and not get any confirmation on anything.
#bang chan#chan#skz#stray kids#changbin#seo changbin#hyunjin#lee know#lee minho#tarot reading#children#imagine#reaction#headcanon
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obligatory disclaimer to all the "its just mc eggs its not that deep" people that this is about characters. we are allowed to post character analysis, even ones that arent positive, about fictional characters no matter what medium theyre from. this is 10000% about the characters, not the admins and there are moments i may not know about since i cant watch every pov but heres my thoughts on the sunny/leo "beef"
which it feels wrong, at this point, to even call it beef when its mostly one sided on leo's part and the adults are failing both sunny and leo
does leo have the right to be wary about the new eggs? 100%, absolutely
does that excuse her recent treatment of sunny? no
is leo to blame for her behavior? well, no, she's a child
do i think q!foolish and q!tubbo are good fathers? yes
did they both drop the ball in regards to this situation and should have handled it better? yes, but that doesnt mean its not too late now
again, i dont fault leo for being distrustful and cautious of the new eggs, its more than reasonable given what shes gone through. im glad she's warmed up to pepito and i think it's a good choice on foolish's part to not force her to interact with anyone she doesnt like while still encouraging her to try. that being said, i think he should say something to leo about how she has recently been treating sunny because it is quickly getting to the point where it is bullying, not "beef"
to be fair, maybe he hasnt seen [in character/roleplay] the extent to which she has treated sunny, and obviously none of the parents are aware of the baby fight club, but even then, someone should say something to leo if they see behavior similar to how leo treated sunny after the fight [although i believe foolish and roier are two of the only people she will actually listen to /neu] with that being said, i dont think foolish takes it very seriously and at the end day has a rather "well what can you do" type of mentality about it.
we know that leo is stubborn and can be a little hard headed, which is one of the reasons why i personally love her, but its been toeing the line in regards to sunny and i feel as though she crossed it during the baby fight club. sunny has been trying to take leo's feelings into consideration [among other eggs, such as tallulah, who excuse it as distrust of the new eggs despite being warm/neutral to both em and pepito while being harsher to sunny].
the fact that the fight ended and sunny was trying to leave when leo blocked the exit and continued to hit sunny shows that her feelings towards sunny are more than just apprehension. even ramon, leo's triplet, felt the need to step to in and separate them out of concern for sunny's well being.
i can also see the nuance of leo's behavior: its the first time where she has disliked someone and been forced to be in close vicinity/interact with them, and no one has taught her that this sort of behavior isnt ok so how is she supposed to know better?
its not an excuse by any means, but it doesnt make it any less bullying than it is. this is where the adults are failing not just sunny [by being bystanders] but theyre failing leo, too.
and sure, disagreements and fights between the eggs is interesting.. when it comes from both parties but when you have one egg--one child--who doesnt want to be around another egg child in consideration of their feelings while the other egg child vandalizes their things and hits them to the point of almost being downed--that's not a disagreement. thats bullying.
does leo have to like sunny? no
do i think that they have more in common and similar feelings of loneliness that they both dont realize, which could make way for a friendship? yes
would i mind if leo never warms up to sunny? no
its realistic. sometimes kids just.. dont get along and thats ok, its good to teach children that we arent going to get along with everyone or even like them [and not everyone is going to like us and we shouldnt try to force them to], but its also important to teach children that not liking somebody doesnt make it okay to treat them poorly or bully them.
in fact, this would be a really good situation in which both leo and sunny can learn the aforementioned, especially since their fathers are good friends that enjoy one another's company so i dont see them stopping hangouts anytime soon so leo and sunny will hopefully learn to, at the very least, be civil with one another. i hope this is the direction the story goes because a bully arc is one of the last things i personally want to watch
i understand its hard, especially when their first languages are not one that they share, but thats what the qsmp is all about, isnt it? coming together in spite of language barriers
im hoping the sunny/leo situation takes a turn for the better, even if it takes time to get to a point where they are mostly indifferent to one another w/o excessive antagonizing
with all that said, i will always have faith in the admins to give us their best, even if the outcome isnt what we wanted or expected
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Prologue 1/3 Not a Fairy Godmother
We’re all pretty agreed Wysteria is fantasy France, right? Right… I’m always thinking too much about worldbuilding, so I got the idea in my head that the lower classes in Wysteria have more pronounced French accents. The nobility would be speaking with more proper English accents, probably because I’ve already headcanoned that Wysteria was colonized by a fantasy England in its history. Also this isn’t going to be fantasy, I’m using ‘witch’ more in the folk sense.
Very open to critique, dont worry about being nice to me lol. More boys once I get into the midcin prologue proper, and I'm going to start writing Louis' route first. POVs will change up part to part based on how I feel
Loretta Vachon, an adult woman of indeterminate age, indeterminate origin but confirmed Wysterian citizenship, and indeterminate occupation. Anything prior to her arrival in the very outskirts of the city around the palace was not entirely clear. But what information they did have from neighbors and several days of observation by palace spies was consistent. Regarded as a witch or diviner by some, Giles thought ‘herbalist’ or something along those lines was likely more accurate. She was reported as trustworthy, sometimes more than generous or forgiving in her services and repayments, rude and blunt more often than not.
The address in her name didn’t appear to be any kind of storefront, a narrow little home with two floors. Giles was sure it was alright to walk through the door though, even without a sign. A bell on the inside rang as he did.
“Just a moment,” A voice called but then shouted, “‘ey!”
There was a bang and clustered, skittering sound as two chickens ran up the narrow hall from further in the house.
“Open the door for them, would you?” That voice called again.
Giles hesitated to let them out into the street, but the bell rang again and off they went. When he turned around she was standing in the doorway to the hall, so clearly appraising him before he had the chance to appraise her first. She was as described, maybe smaller than he had thought. Her long ashy brown hair was cut unevenly, with two mismatched lengths touching her cheeks in different places. She might have been beautiful, he surmised, with some refinement.
“If you are here from the tax office, you can see it is as I have told you before. I do not have proper signage, so the property cannot be registered as a business.”
She approached him with her arms out like she was herding him out the door, “So I don’t owe you any more money this year, goodbye,”
A lot of refinement. Though a strong will was exactly what was needed, and it wasn’t something he could teach. The way she spoke would need work as well. Articulate as she was, she spoke in the same accent as much of the Wysterian working class. She didn’t pronounce her h’s at all and her words blended together too much.
“I’m not from any tax office. You’re Loretta Vochan, yes?”
“Who’s asking?” She asked, eyeing him suspiciously again.
He bowed to her, practiced and polite, and answered, “Giles Christophe, Chamberlain.”
Her black eyes went wide as she looked at his face, brows shot up. He couldn’t help smiling a bit at that expression. Just then the door opened behind Giles, and a man with graying hair entered.
“Lettie,” He started, then noticed Giles almost in the doorway.
“Mssr. Reynolds, I have your mix ready.” Loretta turned on her heel into the other room.
Through the large open doorway Giles could see a mess of vials, small plants, jars of bones, little silver blades and tools across a workspace. She disappeared into another side room and returned with a jar of bright orange liquid with what almost looked like pulp in it.
“Shake it twice a day or it will get stuck at the bottom.” She said with an air of reminding him.
He smiled and nodded, but also eyed Giles with something like suspicion. He lingered there for a moment after taking the jar, like he didn’t want to leave them alone. Loretta turned her back on them again as she said,
“Have a good day, Mssr. Reynolds.” and reentered the work room.
He left with no mention of repayment between either of them. Loretta faced Giles as she stood at the table in the center of the work room. Despite the myriad of blades around her she took a small knife from her apron and began chopping herbs as if they had offended her.
“Why is the Chamberlain in my home?” She asked slowly.
“To give you this,” He took the envelope from his coat pocket and entered the work room, holding it out to her.
She put the knife down, her lips twisted in an unsure pout. Before she could turn the paper over to read it, the door burst open again. Two boys came running into the house, darting around the furniture and playing tag.
“‘Ey!” She shouted again, thrusting the envelope onto the table roughly and smearing it in green moisture from the chopped herbs. Loretta hastened into the living room as one of them jumped over her coffee table, “What do you think this is? Out!”
She was throwing pebbles and little debris from her apron pockets at them, but the boys just laughed and ran out the door. They didn’t look afraid of any witch. A woman came in a moment after them looking haggard,
“I’m sorry Lettie,”
“It’s fine,” Loretta sighed, taking a basket of bread and pastries from the woman.
“But that little charm you gave Roger worked, he's finally slept through the night the past two weeks.”
Outside they could all hear the boys laughing, followed by a sort of scream accompanied by the sounds of chickens squawking.
“How fortunate.” Loretta said flatly. “You should consider a plant for his bedroom.”
This woman hesitated to leave as well as she looked over Giles. He was careful to dress as modestly as his wardrobe allowed, but it was hard not to stand out. But when Loretta turned her back again and bid the woman goodbye with a finality, they were alone again.
“The people seem rather wary to leave me alone with you. Why is that?”
“They’re more wary that you found the place at all.” She said offhandedly, turning the envelope over again and reading its contents. Her brows creased further and further down, lip curling more as she read the short contents.
“What?” She gaped, as if the paper had spoken a different language to her. “Who is giving me this?”
“I am.”
That incredulous look was turned at him. “Why the hell would you do that?”
Again he found it hard not to smile a little. “I was able to find the store, so that means I need something from you. That’s how it works, right?”
She didn’t answer.
“So my request is that you come to the ball. Find me there.”
She gave a long, hard look between Giles and the invitation. “I do charge, you know. I take bread from the villagers, but you have to pay coin.”
“Coin won’t be an issue for you, rest assured.” Giles smiled again.
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Idk if this is something you’d want to read but after reading your post about being lonely, i definitely feel the same way 😅 albeit probably a little different. I dont really have anyone to talk to about this feeling so i thought maybe i’d share this. I just started a seasonal job in retail at 22, ive never had a “real job” because since i was 14 i was considered the “family babysitter” & once i turned 16 i kept applying for jobs so i didnt have to keep babysitting, nothing worked out because i was always met with “you need more experience “ & i kept getting that until i was 20 (when i just gave up & accepted I’ll probably be a babysitter for family/family friends forever 🥲). Ive only really been surrounded by kids & family, my mom took me out of highschool in my 1st year because she hated the public school system & decided to “homeschool” (which was go get my ged at 18), so i never got to experience the highschool life & friends, i was pretty isolated. Aside from getting rejected from jobs constantly, i wasnt able to go to college after either because it was too much money & that “nobody would be at home watching kids”. So ive just constantly felt very alone & whenever i would mention it i was met with things like “dont be selfish. you should be thankful youre not out there in the world, it’s evil” etc etc. Along with the fact i dont know how to drive, i had a huge fear whenever i was 15/16 so i never learned then but when i was 18 i didnt have that anymore & wanted to. I was constantly trying to get people to teach me, but no one would and driving school costs a ton which i didnt have bc no paying job. That added on to that feeling & i kept feeling behind
So fast forward to now at 22, i was finally able to get a seasonal job at victorias secret and nov 4 was my first training day. I still have that feeling & now im just stressed about everything. They immediately put me on cash register & very vaguely explained things to me, so i wasnt the best when trying to check people out & i know in retail you’ll get horrible customers sometimes and that’s literally all i got. I was so overwhelmed & i did accidentally mess up someone’s change (which was fixed!) so i had them screaming at me 2 hours in my first training day. And i cant stop thinking about how inadequate i felt during that & that whole day really. I would get judgmental looks from the other workers when i would ask questions, because ive never done anything like this before. I kept getting looked at like i was stupid for not knowing things & that messed with me (still is). I dont think itll be like that entire time im there, im hoping at least.
And i still dont know how to drive, i tried once this year from my older sister but she started grabbing the wheel when i was trying to drive because she panicked (i was going in a straight line in a empty parking lot) & stated she’s never trying to teach me again. My younger cousins learned how, have their license and new cars already & i hate that i feel jealous and angry about it because it is family, but everyone who helped them constantly told me they couldn’t with me year ago & still now. I get subtle remarks of “your cousins can drive already/youre 22 & relying on others to drive you” etc. (they also all have jobs already & not a seasonal one like me) But yeah, i feel so alone & inadequate at literally everything, have for years. Breakdown all the time because i have no clue on what to do & i have no one to talk to about it.
Rant over, sorry for how long it is, im probably being dramatic too, there are people who have it worse than i do 😅 but yeah, i get that feeling! I do hope you feel better better about it 🫶🏻🤎
Don't say sorry! It's alright. Rather I am glad that you found me and my blog safe enough to share your troubles with.
and let me tell you that you are just 22. You still have a whole lot of time ahead to make money, to learn driving, to make friends, to enjoy life and do everything you want to do.
Don't ever think you are late or that time is slipping away from your clutches! It's not.
I am 25 and I can't even cook. Can you believe it? a 25 year old woman who can't even fry an egg properly while cooking is a basic survival skill? my friends can make a whole feast if they want to and I only know how to boil some instant noodles. At times this made me feel like an inferior too but no, none of us are inferior to one another because what I can't do - you can and what you can't do - I can. we are all lacking and it's okay.
Also, if those people made you feel like a fool just because they didn't train you properly then it's their fault, not yours. when you start working you need to learn one thing that is to make you skin thick. It's only you who needs to know the truth - that it's not your fault - and the rest of the world can go fuck off.
and what if you did some mistakes? we all are allowed to do so. mistakes are the only way we get to learn, isn't it?
So, please, darling. Cheer up! You have a ton of time to buy that car or get that job or tell people to fuck off when they ask you to watch their kids. Things aren't over yet. You are doing good. You will do even better tomorrow and one day you will be the best! I believe in you and I am proud of you!
even though I know we are basically strangers but just know this person right here, an elder sister to you, will always be proud of you no matter what!
if you want to talk, slide into my inbox any time. I will always welcome you!
Love you!! 💕💕💕💕
P.S: You should have charged for those babysitting sessions.
P.S.S: I, too, don't know how to drive. LMAO!
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The one where Allen's swore enemy is a salmon (dont ask)
Cw: none.
Summary: Allen and Z go fishing, results are nothing short of hilarious.
->Zoe is @theallenshorefangirl oc. This is a lil gift for her.
--Man, its a nice day today-- Commented Allen, fixing his bucket hat.
--huh,yeah-- zoe agreed, looking up at the Sky.
The waves on the sea ebb and flow calmly, it glimmers under the sunlight as if the Ocean was filled with glitter, the seagulls sing in the distance and the boat theyre on rocks Gently
--I know its not the best boat-- Allen started,looking at his sister and pulling her in a side hug
--I think its perfect-- The woman replied leaning on him. She watches as her brother smiles and nodds approvingly.
They settle on the two little seats on the small fishing boat, Allen teaches Z how to prepare the fishing rod and the bait, hes patient and speaks very softly.
--Hey,its okay if you dont get it right the first time-- he Gently strokes her back-- Man, I didnt get it right the first time either.
--Oh-oh really?
--Yeah! I think I spent a solid fifteen minutes, you currently sit at two.
Zoes eyes go wide and she smiles a little, no longer frustrated-- Im gonna beat your time, Shore-- now,she sounds motivated.
That Next try she does is succesful,she cheers and Allen claps. Then they get to fishing, Both make lively conversation as the radio plays some 90s bop.
--Hey,whoever fishes the biggest fish doesnt make dinner today-- Allen proposed with a smirk.
--Youre on!--his sister replied with a big grin, her purple scarf swaying in the wind.
A few more minutes go by where both just sing and jam along happily, they sometimes switch to talking or just silence. Its cozy, comfortable. Two siblings spending time together.
Something tugs at zoes line,as she reels it in the thing pulls back and she has to lock her feet into place by putting them under the small space between the floor of the boat and the small Seat.
--Oh god!-- she yells.
--reel it in!--Allen encourages, to then see how the tug of the line makes his sister lean forward violently-- OH CRAP -- he grabs the fishing rod with one arm and the other goes around her torso, he helps her pull the fish to them.
Crash! Both fall on the floor of the boat and they see a Giant atlatic salmon flapping infront of them.
--Jesus!--Allen exclaims.-- you did it Z!
--Look at that!--She holds up the fish from the fishing line. The salmon is a solid 34 inches.
--Goddamn! Aint no way I can beat that!
Zoe laughed loudly-- I win! I wiiiin! In your face shore!
Allen laughs and nodds-- yes! You did. Im making dinner tonight, and youuu-- he pokes at the salmon-- are the dinner
The salmon does not take it well and its tail slaps him across the face. Its so funny zoe cant ask her brother if hes okay that she doubles over with laughter. Allen looks like a deer in headlights.
--Damn,he did not like that-- he murmurs-- put that bastard in the bucket.
Z holds up her hand to the tail of the first-- high five!--The fins of the tail slap against her palm and she giggles, then she puts it In the bucket with the other fish.
By nightfall they are back on the shore and up Allen's little house Next to the lighthouse. Zoe lays on the sofa while her brother Cooks.
--I think i found a name for the boat-- The Man says with a smile.
--Oh yeah? What is it?
--Fishing vessel Z&A-- he replied with a smile-- Z for zoe, A for Allen. You go first because you beated me to our fishing competition.
Zoe smiles,happiness ebbing in her chest, she curls up on the sofá and looks at the tv-- I like that!
Allen humms along to a mindless tune and keeps cooking, side eyeing the salmon-- youre gonna pay for it-- he grumbles.
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Contemplating: Undead Philosophy
The first thing you have to realize is that the human brain only has space for the thinga it can or wants to hold on to. If you choose to remember something, it will hold. Now when we add immortality and a curse or primal urge to the equation then what we get is just an elongation of the human condition.
Realistically the two things terrible about being immortal and cursed are A) the obvious downsides of the curse, such as cannibalistic hemophagia or just straight cannibalism, and B) the memories of those youve built lives with dying while leaving you to face forever without them.
Put a pin in A, as its obvious, and lets address the stupidity of B. Death is something we all learn to accept and grow around as we age, and many a old person is more comfortable with death as a concept for others around them. Granted, the loneliness of the eldery is strong and those relationships all have meaning but one can make a strong case for modern sensibilities of how we date and move on, or how we build comfortable long term relationships with people who share our lifespan and enjoy the comfort pattern.
Now we take the immortals who pair and while all relationships have their ups and downs, living forever gives you more time to work around and develop more positive habits if you truly love and want to be with another person. A stone in a river will polish and smooth over time, and while people dont think that diamonds could have similar smoothing, if you leave anything in a tumbler long enough it will smooth out.
On friendships and other relationships, found family and transitional friendships are equally a part of our society, from school to higher education, from adoption and supportive friend groups who teach more isolated and naive people of abuse and misinformation, all these things build and ingratiate us to the human condition and make us want to know and see more even when we are older and in our comforts because the comforts do hide snakes sometimes, such as an unwillingness to learn or grow from disinterest or becoming jaded with the darker sides of society, walling ourselves away and pushing back against the world, but the truth of even that is in time and chance. Eventually, someone will come along and break down those walls and show us a better way to live, and when one or more of the people in this scenario are immortal, it means that there is more wisdom and want to live more of that life thats been put down for a time.
Now, back to A: a curse is navigable within reason, such as eating cadavers or drinking blood without killing the donor, but obviously it wouldn't be a curse if it was so easily worked around. The true nature of the curse could be anything from a tangible force compelling negative actions as a tie to the immortality, to a psychosomatic compulsion convincing oneself to commit atrocities as a means to cope or justify having more life; balancing the scales as it were.
Regardless, these things are either a indicator of antisocial and borderline personality tendencies or are harsh and insurmountable challenges to a sound mind, and are likely the real reason immortals would fall apart at the seams. Most scenarios have the immortal dehumanize their prey, making them cattle in their eyes, or monsterize themselves and classify themselves as something more than human and thus justifying the act either in virtue or vice.
There are cases of the avenging monster, those who kill criminals and wrong-doers as labelled by society in order to justofy their existence and excuse their actions, though many societies avoid the death penalty because they do not agree with this sentiment and it paints the immortal in question as more immoral by ignoring this line of thought for long periods of time.
A third, less common option is disassotiation, where the immortal would simply let things happen as they do and not file themselves into the morality of society in any manner. Floating through actions and doing things as needs demand is a practical hedonism for such beings, and makes them more like an animal than a rationalization of thier actions as they cling to a normal moral compass.
An even less common thought I would put to the test is the experimentation angle, submitting the immortal by their own volition to science to avoid a phyrric victory against the curse element of the immortal's being by simply dying. This could lead to a narrative of either better preventing death from undead interactions or the curing/improving of the immortal's condition. The only exploration of this that comes to mind was part of the Buffy/Angel whedonverse where they experimented on monsters and the character Spike, for all their still persistent flaws, became more like a person and less of a vampire through their arc. A flawed example, but one that touches the thought.
In some summation, I think that while it is perfectly reasonable to maintain the harsh drawbacks of undeath as a means of character building it is equally unnecessary to build some suffering immortal, alone and disenchanted with living as those aspects are easily wiped away with any fundamental knowledge of human interactions. That being said, a story can create any kind of character as long as the logic works and I personally would love to be a kind hearted chupacabra with a large goat farm and being well known for how well I've butchered my meat for the past 800 years.
#undead#immortality#Immortal#cursed#compulsion#desire#dark urge#Urge#fantasy#horror#contemplative#contemplation#relationship#romance#romantic
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Hi i am using what little platform i have to advocate for pro-choice, by the means i know how, that will appeal to younger audiences
☆★✦✡✪✩✧✮✭✬✫✯⁑⁂✰✴✳✲✱✥✤✣
Security breach characters stance on abortion
Tw, mentions of r//pe, child sexual violence, incest, suicide, self harm, gun violence, school shootings
☆★✦✡✪✩✧✮✭✬✫✯⁑⁂✰✴✳✲✱✥✤✣
Glamrock freddy🎩
🎤 for sure a fierce pro-choice ally,
🎤 gets confused sometimes, thinking it's killing a child, but remembers, it is still healthcare, that people need, and frankly he understands it is none of his business what people do with their bodies.After awhile he'll learn from someone that the embryo is a single celled organisim at conseption, and cannot feel anything when aborted.
🎤he thinks since it is health care it should be federally protected, health care is a human right, and with the banning of abortion, you ban healthcare, thus calling afab people not human.
🎤he understands it should not be up to cis-het men.
🎤be like glamrock freddy.
☆★✦✡✪✩✧✮✭✬✫✯⁑⁂✰✴✳✲✱✥✤✣
Monty Gator 🐊
🎸doesnt understand.
🎸but that doesnt mean he doesnt support,
🎸its just that he is ignorant to human problems, and frankly doesnt care, its none of his business what goes on in peoples bodies.
🎸be a bit like monty
☆★✦✡✪✩✧✮✭✬✫✯⁑⁂✰✴✳✲✱✥✤✣
Glamrock Chica 🐔
🍳FIERCE ALLY
🍳i know for a fact. She would not be down with the "pro-life" bullshittery.
🍳in fact she would, after finding out about roe v wade, use her influence to teach about safe sex, vesictomy, planned parent hood benefits, where it is safe to get an abortion, and how to peacefully contact representatives.I
🍳be like chica
☆★✦✡✪✩✧✮✭✬✫✯⁑⁂✰✴✳✲✱✥✤✣
Roxanne wolf 🎹
🏁the mother fucking angriest animatronic out of them all.I
🏁 the pure unbrittled rage she would unleash istg.
🏁 she would be the one teaching about safe at home abortion
🏁but mostly she'd speak out against the ruling.
🏁she'd teach how, it should be a choice, not up to cis men AT ALL. They dont have to carry the baby for forty weeks, they dont have to now, be forced to suffer birthing a stillborn, that they knew would be still born and still get prosecuted for it, raped children, teens, adults, seniors, being charged with a crime for wanting to abort not a child, but a reminder, children afab being forced to carry the ir fathers child, and people who they know cannot take care of a child.
🏁she'd teach how papaya induces miscarriage
🏁she'd teach how tear gas, can induce miscarriage, so you should go protest the ruling, with a water bottle with a squirt nozle that is covered and has untainted water to squirt in your eyes, with a lemon in your mouth so you dont vomit or dry heave.
🏁she'd sneak people into cargo trucks that go over state lines to get a safe abortion
🏁she understands that they didnt ban abortion, but safe abortion, now so many people afab will die because they were forced to give birth, forced to do an at home abortion, were kicked out by their parents and starved to death on the streets alone, forced to carry something didnt want so they felt the only way out was suicide
🏁she understands that the majority of people who will suffer due to this are poc, seeing as they dont have all the resources that white people do.
🏁she understands that this is the land of the free, for straight white cis men. Not for all women, all poc, all people in the lgbtqia+, all children, all immigrants, all people in the lower class, all asains, all people that are nerodivergant
🏁be like roxy
🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟
Daycare attendant (sun/moon)🌞🌜
🌑second biggest ally, closest to roxy
🌒they may be the one who interacts with children the most, but they know, damn well, a majority of them wouldnt be there without the choice of safe abortion
🌓they understand, why should the government force a person to carry a child, when the government cant protect them from gun violence in schools.
🌔they understand because now they will have to watch adults come in pregnant with a child they dont want, and drop of the child they did want. They understand that persons pain when being asked " how far along are you, have any names? " and then thwy breakdown sobbing because they know their child will be born stillborn.
🌕he would be the one having to tell people to delete period trackers because they can use those to prosecute people afab
🌖he would explain how now with this overturned, they can now overturn, samesex marriage, same sex relationships, any trans rights, inter-racial relationships, the right to birthcontrol, the protection of native americans, LITTERALLY ANYTHING FEDERALLY PROTECTED, yes even gun laws, womens right to vote, people of color saftey laws, jim crow laws, protection for religion.
🌗they would be so angry.
🌘he would know the names of everyone afab arrested for a miscarriage a still birth anything, Brittney poolaw, marashe jones, Anne bynum, the other four. Hundred. And. Thirteen people afab being arrested for miscarriage and stillborn, due to anti-abortion laws.
🌑be like the daycare attendant
🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟
okay now take the fanfic parts out and just read the facts.
#fnaf fandom#fnaf glamrock freddy#fnaf security breach#fnag security breach#security breach#glittergolf#fnaf sun#montgomery gator#glamrock freddy x reader#glamrock freddy#roxanne wolf#glamrock foxy#glamrock chica#dj music man#scott cawthon#sundrop#sun x monty#monty x sun#daycare attendant#roe v wade
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Could i request some short hcs with the demon bros and an mc who stutters, I understand if not, I hope you're having a good day!!
I really hope I did this request justice. I dont stutter but i am a dumbass who speaks too fast and trips over her words so theres that
THE BROTHERS with an MC who stutters
Lucifer:
At the VERY beginning, like, the moment you two met and maybe… a little while after that until he realized you’re cool, he found it really annoying. Like, why can’t you get out what you’re trying to say? In all honesty, he may have also taken it as fear at first which made him feel better inside than it should have but he’s kind of over that part now. After learning that it’s not fear and you kind of do it involuntarily, he felt something along the lines of… adorableness? The stuttering made you that much more innocent, in his eyes, and he loves innocence. It’s adoring to him and makes him want to protect you.
Mammon:
10/10 mocked you the first time you guys met. Now, back then he was obviously annoyed that he was your designated babysitter, but the stuttering just made you such an easy target, too! Obviously, he felt bad after a while, especially if it really upset you and now he’s running around with a huge chunk of guilt and it’s just not fun, ya know? So, he did what any good demon would do and actually, albeit indirectly, apologized. And after that he vowed to teach anyone who made fun of your stuttering a lesson. No one messes with his MC!!! And yes, he gets quite overprotective.
Leviathan:
He felt… drawn to you, if that makes sense? He tends to sometimes stutter as well, although his is more out of nervousness. Honestly, he may even have made fun of you like once or twice but he really does know how wack it is to not get things out of your mouth “normally” be it because of nervousness or involuntarily. He doesn’t like seeing you struggle, either, and he’s started doing this little thing where he will shift into his demon form for a quick moment and just stroke your back with his tail but if you turn or catch him, he’s quick to shift back out of embarrassment.
Satan:
Ah yes, he also made fun of you. It also took him a long time to stop making fun of you. For a while, you were his #1 prank target because your reactions and stuttering made it so fun, but… he began to think. How terrible must it be to have so many thoughts and words on your tongue and you’re unable to get them out clearly? Sure, people will understand you, but not many people will respect you. It makes him… sad. He’s actually feeling bad for you and… he stopped. He stopped the pranks and he gives you the time now, to talk and to think, because everyone deserves to be heard.
Asmodeus:
He always found it adorable. Maybe it’s because he thought you were nervous and why would you be nervous around him? Or maybe it’s because you’re slightly uncomfortable, but no worries, Asmo comes to the rescue! He would never make fun of you but you can bet your ass that he will try to… amplify your stuttering? If that makes sense? He’s literally swooning over it and you’ll be showered in love for it.
Beelzebub:
In all honesty, he’s slightly there with Lucifer in the sense that it was annoying to listen forever for you to get your word out BUT that annoyance lasted a day, tops. He actually felt bad for you because demons are ruthless and the people at RAD weren’t always nice so he made sure to stick by you as much as he could to keep you away from any bullies. He’s also so open to just helping you finish a sentence? Or he forces the other party to listen until you finish because hot damn baby you deserve that much respect.
Belphegor:
Oh yeah he also made fun of you, probably called you a broken record. Much like Satan, you became his target. But, the good thing about Belphegor is that he gets bored fairly easily so his bullying of you didn’t last long. And once he developed feelings? Boy oh boy you might want to watch out; he’s after everyone that makes fun of you. Sassy remarks, snarky comments, tripping them down the stairs… Nowadays there’s also something comforting about the stuttering.. He sees it as getting to hear your voice a lot more because you stutter on certain words, meaning you have to stick around longer to explain yourself… if that makes sense?
#obey me#obey me shall we date#obey me headcanons#obey me scenarios#cheys headcanons#asmodeus obey me#belphegor obey me#mammon obey me#obey me lucifer#leviathan obey me#obey me satan#beelzebub obey me
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B D J O V for Donnie, Karl and Alcina? (yes I am in love, no I dont have regrets uwu)
My 3 loves? Well why not! And pls enjoy the ficlet styles I’m going to opt for when doing dirty secrets! This is a little long so is going under the cut.
🩸🍷Alcina Dimitrescu🩸🍷
B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and on the other)
A bit of an odd one here but she loves backs, like your actual back. The line of your spine, if you have those back dimples, ufff. She loves the shape of it if you’re on the more curvier side, she loves the skin, and your rolls, and any stretch marks. Just picture that elegant hand of hers ghosting over your back, nails maybe even claws.
On herself, well Alcina is aware of her assets and she’s very aware of her chest, both she’s quite proud of but she’s really proud of her figure over all.
D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
There was a pretty seamstress in the village who always was brought up to the castle to help with her dresses. She was a pretty thing in Alcina’s eyes, very much her type. When your making or fixing or measuring a tailor made outfit for a 9ft+ woman well it gets tricky and a little more handsy than usual. Alcina didn’t mind, the seamstress didn’t either. It was interesting following simple commands even if they were asked upon her with nothing but grace and poise.
So as Alcina sat for the 40th time to have something around her neck marked to be fixed, she had to stand between her legs to best approach and see the mistake. Only sitting did she have the best chance at seeing her at a more eye to eye level (well as best as it could be).
She isn’t dumb, she knows curiosity, want and lust like the back of her hand. Sees the nervous swallow of the seamstress whenever hands glide across her chest. The whispered ‘pardon my lady’ when she rests a palm on Alcina’s throat and takes a needle to the neckline with all the gentleness she can muster. Of course it’s the moment to prick her finger, the quiet hiss and scent is enough to alert Alcina and without waiting for her to fuss she takes that bleeding digit and kisses it, tastes the bead of blood, all while looking straight at her. When she still sees lust there, oh does she pull her closer.
One of her maids walks in about twenty minutes later, an array of materials in her arms so she doesn’t quite catch how the Lady of the castle smooths her dress and tries not to laugh, chest heaving a little and legs closing a tad. The maid greets her with her usual honorifics before leaving the requested materials, she notices the seamstress isn’t there and arches a brow at the room. “Lavatory” is all Alcina says before the maid makes a question. She nods but feels something isn’t right with the current picture but still leaves.
Once gone.
The seamstress crawls out from under Alcina’s skirt, mouth shiny, hair disheveled and nice set of teeth marks at her bosom.
It becomes a frequent thing after that.
J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)
It’s not to say she needs to because she sincerely feels she has anybody at her beck and call who is willing ready and able. But on the rare occasion she indulges in some self care, it’s mostly in her luxurious tub. Feeling the warm water, her hair clean and smelling of that weeks chosen fragrance, well it gets her thinking and thinking leads desiring and if there isn’t anybody she’ll handle it. Slow, she loves drawing out her own pleasure, loves to feel that rise but stops before it’s too close. She’ll do that, edge herself a little bit more before biting down on her lip to muffle a more particular louder cry.
O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)
Both. She lives for giving it and she loves to receive it. She is just, wow, so incredibly good at it, she’s goes about it in such erotic and passionate way and if you’re not looking like you are being possessed by the devil then she up’s her game to make sure that happens. You can squeeze her head with your thighs all you want, she’s built different lol she can handle it. Don’t yank to much on her hair though, claw at her all you want but easy on the do.
She’s had a few inexperienced lovers which she has to guide when they want to go down on her. She’s very particular of what and how she likes it, but she’s patient enough to teach you.
V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)
I’ll do you one better, https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMRSKhUoh/
⚙️Heisenberg⚙️
B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and on the other)
https://hagelpaimon.tumblr.com/post/661063110466158592/i-wonder-wonder-who-ill-pick-hesi-baby-a
D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) shout out to @imthegreenfairy88 for helping me out with this one.
The first few times he indulged in this he was very adamant in keeping it to himself and to himself only (with time and reassurance he chills out) but the first time he tried doing ‘back door’ stuff on himself he was very surprised about how good it fucking felt and every so often he indulged in it. There’s an occasion where he ends up in bed with some tourist, gun to his head he doesn’t remember their name but he sure fucking remember the blow job and fingering combo that they gave him that had him seeing fucking stars. He tensed up at first was about to say something but they crooked their fingers just right and swallowed his cock at the same time and words were out the window along with thoughts.
He was so far gone that it didn’t cross his mind that when he begged for another finger, he gave himself away and if their eyes weren’t indication of how delighted they had been, feeling two more additional fingers really proved the point.
J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)
I mean I’m saying yea, he has to get creative with it sometimes so as to not get bored, but he picks up a few things he enjoys (he is creative after all) he’s definitely ruined his fair share of pillows, loves rutting into them. He has beat off probably in any section of the factory but shower is better for clean up. He for sure has done it outside of the factory, probably relaxing on a chair and if the weather is nice enough, it’s not like anybody is gonna suddenly drop by. He likes a tight closed fist when he’s close but enjoys a teasing touch to start things off, really enjoys grabbing his balls when he does it. Very messy messy boy when he cums.
O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)
This man blows you like his life depends on it. VERY sloppy but it’s really hot, it’s how eager he is about it and how willing he is to suffocate and or choke on it. He’s told you to sit on his face multiple times at multiple moments of the day. He loves the taste of you, loves feeling suffocated by your thighs. You know what they about big noses too 🥴🥴
As for receiving he likes to dish out what he takes. So expect some rough mouth fucking, he will make you gag, he will make you all teary eyed cause he enjoys it. He’s fine with it without to be honest, he much prefers to be balls deep in you but if you enjoy doing it then expect hip thrusting.
V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)
Not super loud, but he isn’t mute. He groans and moans but he’s also a talker so expect a lot dirty talk. His voice drops in a way when he’s fucking you that it makes your toes curl. He’s all breathy pants when he’s close. Lots and lots of cuss words.
👾Donnie💜
B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and on the other)
https://hagelpaimon.tumblr.com/post/661063462078889985/b-body-part-their-favourite-body-part-of-theirs
D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
He likes the taste of his own cum.
He denies it, really denies it, just says it’s his way of cleaning you up after a nice romp but he really has a way of proving the opposite. Donnie has ‘finished’ on you in every way shape or form. On your stomach, back, face etc you name and each time he has cleaned you up he’s either wiped it up and sucked on his fingers or he’s just full blown licked it off of you.
And there is something so disgustingly erotic about that you haven’t or don’t want to call him out on it. You’ve gone down on his multiple times and he very eager to kiss you after your done. One time you purposefully left some on your chin and lips to see if he’d clean it up first but nah, kissed the heck out of you. His favorite is cumin in you and then going down on you. The first time he did that, it was enough to make your toes curl till they cracked and just as you were about to say something he was yanking another orgasm from you. The combined taste of his and yours release? Fuck now that was his favorite.
J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)
Does it and does it often. He’s not prudish about it, it’s free oxytocin and for a guy who’s convinced he’s never gonna get a shot at being with somebody physically, might as well practice some self love.
Loves visual stimulation but he’s really into audio stimuli. Likes those audios where he feels he’s there with the person or the ones where they give instructions. Donnie is really into edging and if he’s got the time and privacy he can literally edge himself for a couple of hours. Has at times managed hands free orgasms. Has made cock sleeves or basically fleshlights (ah ingenuity), can have his moments where he’s super slow and teasing about it, light strokes and all that. Can also have moments where he basically fucks his fist to the point of making some pretty obscene wet noises. If listening to audios or watching videos he really loves trying to cum at the same time as the person in the vid or audio. Has a bottle of lotion right on the desk but that shit is so cluttered with stuff that nobody has picked up on it and honestly it’s kinda funny.
O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)
GIVE GIVE GIVE.
Oh my lord is he OBSESSED with giving oral. It’s such a big turn on for him. He just loves how intimate it is, he loves how he’s giving you pleasure in such an intimate position. LOVES over stimulating with his mouth, loves feeling thighs trying to break his head, happy to die down the suffocated in his favorite place, loves feeling a hand at the back of his head and pushing him in further.
He’s not crazy about receiving cause he knows his size is a challenge but he’s not opposed to it, he much rather get a hand job from you.
V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)
Loud and not afraid about it. He enjoys the fuck out of it and is going to be vocal about it unless it’s adamant to be quiet because people are around. His churrs are really nice, deep but not as baritone as say Raph’s, but they feel and sound so good.
#tmnt bayverse#re8 village#donnie#heisenberg#alcina dimitrescu#lady d#lady dimitrescu#tmnt Donatello#Karl Heisenberg#lord heisenberg#tmnt Donnie#Donatello#ns*w alphabet#ask#dianounais
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HQ CAPTAINS AS THINGS
i was bored and felt like doing a crackfic thing but i didn’t have any solid themes or good ideas
SO I PRESENT TO YOU - THE CAPTAINS. AS THINGS. IDK HOW TO WORD THIS BUT YOU’LL SEE AS WE GO ALONG.
warnings: VERY LONG, slandering a crybaby oikawa (lovingly), mentions f!reader, shitposting, mentions of violence in kita's, (a bit) yandere!kita, cursing, unedited, me being an idiot
officer!daichi
we are: vigilante/troublemaker
loving the enemies-to-lovers trope so much
nah bro you ain’t full criminal (bc my preppy ass could never) you just do the small vandalism things y’know like drawing peepees on government buildings and knocking over bins
u literally confessed to him by spraypainting the entire billboard by his workplace “I LIKE YOU” like way to go girl
He didn’t appreciate the creative graffiti but he rlly likes u so all u had to do was clean it and then next thing u know yall are out on a cute cafe date
but let’s talk about before yall got together
he’d CHASE u thru alleyways when he’d catch you writing “police sux” on the fuckin wall
bro is NOT AT ALL afraid to jump onto the roofs it’s FRIGHTENING to see this huge ass police officer storm after u
HES SO FAST HOT DAMN WOMAN HOW DO U GET AWAY FROM HIM??? USAIN BOLT WHOMST???
you’d almost always get away by a hair - he’s SO SO close
and it frustrates him but excites u oooooo arrest me shawty
and this would continue for a while
but yall have such fun fun banter - you’d tease him and he’d say something back and you’d bolt and he’d chase
some days he’d catch you. but in those times u slip away somehow
he’s having so much fun and doesn’t even know it
and then at one point he doesn’t even care about bringing u to justice anymore. he knows it’s bad for business and it’s unprofessional but he’s so attracted to u
he doesn’t even know it. HES IN DENIAL!!! his mind: “oh i’m just asking about her so that i know her motives” bruh no u just asked about our fav pastry this aint about crime anymore
and when he finally gets it,,,DINGDINGDINGDING SOUND THE ALARMS !!! MAN IS WHIPPED!! he’s more shy around u awww,,,doesn’t even want to chase u anymore but he will still engage in banter w u.
yall get a little peace treaty in the lil crush stage - you both are kinda aware of ur feelings towards each other but don't really wanna mess it up and jeopardize whatever's going on like bros PLEASE JUST KISS ITS INFURIATING
it’s more of a competition to see who will break the other first (and you lost he’s too hot)
he lets u joyride his cop car in an empty parking lot <3 he is the one <3 this is true love
u gotta marry him right now bro no excuses
u are no longer on the crime side of the law,,,u support him and only him fuck the rest of the cops (i’m jk of course...or am i)
u are his badass sidekick <3 unofficially of course until he marries u
u help him with the small things like helping lost children find their parents and helping old ladies cross the street
but you want to do the FUN stuff - chasing thieves and arresting drunkards.
unfortunately, he loves u too much to put u in danger so he keeps u from doing the dangerous things
after some protesting later, he trusts u to take care of urself. and now yall have a competition just like old times - whoever catches the most baddies at the end of the month wins (he WILL scold u if ur too reckless though)
THE TWO OF U ARE JUST GOOD COP BAD COP UHAHAHAHAHAHA
but it’s much more complicated than that - it’s either ur the laidback one and he’s the strict one or ur the fiery one and he’s the person like “calm down”
PLEASE HE HATES BRINGING U TO INTERROGATIONS he’s trying to be serious but you keep making him laugh istg he has to kick u out each time
u still make him laugh when u pout-glare at him thru the glass
bro says he’s not the stereotypical cop but the moment u surprise him with donuts and coffee in the morning he will make out w u right then and there
even though yall dating he still won’t let u play with his equipment
but sometimes u grab his walkie talkie when he’s not looking and prank call the others
and his coworkers know by now they’re like “oh it’s daichis gf” and go along with it HAHAHAHA “this is alpha 1, daichi just contracted ligma, over.” “roger, but what’s ligma? over.” “*inhale* LIGMA-” *daichi takes the walkie talkie back*
his coworkers are chill lmaoooo they love u two as a couple THEY ARE VERY SUPPORTIVE they planned a surprise anniversary party of when u joined the force (unofficially)
the juniors tanaka and noya are jelly ooooo but they respect their captain <3
u loooooove hanging out w the starry-eyed new recruit hinata and he’s bouncing around asking u personal questions “how did you date the commander!!! what’s he like as a bf??” he also accidentally exposes how much daichi talks about u in the office before he drags him away and murders him off camera
he does get u a walkie talkie that’s just connected to his line, tho. for emergencies. it’s ur second phone basically that only has his number in it
daichi LOVES it when u massage him after he’s had a long day but his shoulders are stiff as a statue,,,he’s also super stronk and can carry u anywhere <333
IMAGINE HE HAS A POLICE DOG - he doesn’t, but he’ll get one of his buddies to bring u a k9 unit so u can pet it and when he sees how happy u are he considers getting one PLSSS IT WOULD FIT HIM HELPPP
bro is VERY strict on safety. bulletproof glass in yalls house. alarms + cameras everywhere. trackers on every device. underground bunker. (just kidding lol)
daichi teaches u self-defense and gets u a bejeweled taser for ur bday <333 MARRY THIS MAN RIGHT NOW OR I’LL-
in other words i love daichi and he is husband material WIFE ME UP BUDDY
househusband!oikawa
we are: girlboss sugar mommy
somehow you tamed this bish to becoming your obedient malewife
and by obedient i mean whiny but compliant
IS MORE ATTACHED TO YOUR BLACK CARD THAN TO YOU. I SAID IT. THE TRUTH.
sure, he’s pretty and gives affection sometimes but the only time he’s bein cute and snuggly w u is when a new fendi purse came out and he wants it
his specialty is cooking but he’s so lazy he’s all “just get the maid to do it”
please give ur workers a raise he’s so demanding
when you take him to ur business parties hes ALWAYS bragging about you and ur large house with this and that and his favorite: indoor hot tub. he always brings up the indoor hot tub.
only reason you bring him is cuz he’s pretty and he whines when you leave him alone for too long
yall cant even stay for too long - he’ll practically drag u out of the building and whining that it’s too hot and his suit is too stuffy and to call a limo
he’s not afraid to embarrass u if u dont give him what he wants and he will spit out food at a formal dinner if its not to his liking
probably in competition w househusbands! makki and mattsun about who gets the best house so he’s constantly begging u for an extension to the house “please babe!!! makki has-” “no.”
8/10 times throws tantrums in public and 1465/10 times throws tantrums in the house
he wants to cry for the sake of crying. one time he lost his shirt and he wouldn’t stop bawling for 15 min
please find him a hobby
crybaby . the moment u give him the glare of death it’s over. but he’s got a cute crying face which makes up for his annoying whimpering
like he made the mistake of throwing a temper tantrum in the mall only for you to glare at him with a look that said “we’re discussing this when we get home and you’re gonna get your ass beat” and walk away. immediately stopped what he was doing and he was running after u, sniffling and mumbling apologies
please humble him and have him sleep outside. the couch is too luxurious to banish him to. he made sure of it himself. it’s reclining and has charging ports. he will not learn his lesson that way
does NOT want you to get a pet or a kid or even another sugar baby/househusband - he wants to be the center of ur attention
speaking of which he HATES it when you work for too long or work overseas. when u come back he’ll pout at u and give u the petty silent treatment
don’t bother trying to comfort him he thrives off of it and he’ll keep going so u can keep paying attention to him. if u just ignore him back he’ll come crawling back to u. “WHY ARE YOU IGNORING ME IGNORING YOU?? DO YOU EVEN LOVE ME ANYMORE???”
one time yall got into a fight and he was all like “since ur being a rude mommy i’ll just find someone else !!!” inside u were like “oh god finally” but instead u said “okay”
ohmygod he panicked. he was rlly expecting for u to fight for him,,, but he doesn’t want to admit defeat first so he tries to go thru with it but you literally dont care. even when he has his chanel luggage packed and he’s standing by the door ur just like “ok bye bitch”
So he’s trying to stand by the door and wait for u to say that ur joking. ur not.
“fine! I’m leaving now!” “okay.” “...*sniffles*” “tooru, go.” “WAAAAH NO IM SORRY I DONT WANT TO-”
u knew this was going to happen sadly. u even hid the keys to all of the sports cars u own just in case he was actually going to go thru with it
tries to get in the gossip circle with the neighborhood trophy wives but they don’t think he’s cool enough. they like u though. they think ur hot asf and oikawa doesn’t like them no more bc theyre hitting on his ATM. but thanks to that u know all the gossip and shit even though u don’t ask for it
Every time u pass by a store where he thinks he wants something he’ll just cling to u and give the puppy dog eyes. like it could be out of nowhere and u see it and you’re like “where. which store.”
bro once he went luxury he never went back. he wouldn’t EVER step foot into a grocery store ever again congrats he’s been bimbo-ified
beat him with ur gucci belt pls it’s so funny
also please please PLEASE discipline him. tell him it’s NOT okay to just randomly purchase the entire swarovski store or to throw a party at ur house just bc he’s feeling petty about u being at work for too long. ofc he’ll bitch about it but you need to be firm
but don’t worry,,,he’ll get the idea when u take away black card privileges and slap him around (lovingly)
now he has to ask permission like a good boy. he’ll kneel and hug u and give a lil pout and whine
you got a bigass man child i’m sorry maam u should’ve picked tobio or ushi
ceo!kuroo
we are: secretary
bruh keeps it mostly professional during work hours
but that all gets shedded off like a snake when we on break
one minute he’s all “get these papers done by today or i swear on all that is holy i will destroy you” and then later he’s all “hey sweetheart wanna grab a cup of coffee”
flirty flirty FLIRTY FLIRTY AAAAA HES A MENACE
but you’re less than impressed bc y’know when the time clocks out and its time to go back to work he’s ruthless once more
HUMBLE HIM FOOL only when you’re on break though
will NOT stand for anyone else in the workplace bullyin u - NO WAY. only HIM
he’s got TONS and TONS of dirt on everyone in the office - NO ONE is safe so they wouldn’t even dare
RIP janet from accounting
that dumb bitch made the mistake of insulting u to ur face and in front of him. never heard from her again
it’s not even limited to the other employees - he’s not afraid to go off on a potential business partner if they dared disrespect you
bruh tries to call u on ur off days for the most randomest shit and to get ur attention
*picks up phone* “sir?” “ah! my favorite secretary ever! listen, i need you to grab my pens from my desk at the office and bring them to my place.” “...with all due respect, it’s 2 am, sir.”
but u have to comply with his ridiculous demands cuz he’s the bank
and he depends on u completely. as much as he hates to admit it - u have his schedules, itinerary, provide coffee, performance rates, stock info, you name it.
once u were out sick and he had the worst management - he’s not used to working without you
def tries to get some of ur workload off of u bc he’s worried that the stress of working for him made u sick + he doesn’t want to go thru scheduling again
prolly gets bored in meeting rooms and sends u little smirks and wiggles his eyebrows and weird looks while he’s sitting and ur standing in the corner like bruh pay attention
maybe sometimes he’s secretly makin fun of the presenter and doodling on his spare sticky note something funny to make u crack a smile
he’ll tease u for it of course “oh, secretary! you should be paying more attention! what would you do if this was important?” bruh i can multitask now keep airdropping me ur selfies i’m saving all of them (news flash: u dont save his dumbass selfies otherwise his ego will inflate too much)
sometimes likes to pull u aside from work to hug u - you say it’s highly unprofessional but he says it’s his stress reliever
you ALMOST got caught by one of the newbies and he was kabedon-ing you
he tries to play it off (since u were embarrassed too) but u know better,,,DO NOT LET HIM FORGET ABOUT IT he turns red and embarrassed every single time USE THIS TO UR ADVANTAGE !!
never goes into an elevator without you bruh is so attached to u n holds the doors open for you
but you have to open normal doors for him if he doesn’t know how it works (hint: manual doors. “why isn’t it opening on its own?” “sir, there’s a handle.” “but?? what does it do??”)
bruh acts like a dumbass sometimes so you can baby him :/// wtf man just because you’re rich doesn’t mean i’ll- ...wait...how much did you say…? that many zeros? HAND ME THAT FORK YES I’LL FEED YOU COME HERE- HERE COMES THE AIRPLANE BITCH
brings u to overseas trips and he spoils u too
no matter how much you insist that you’re ok he gives u a lot of luxurious items. “think of it as a bonus from me.” NOW YOU JUST HAVE A COLLECTION OF NICE SHOES/BAGS/JEWELRY AND HE LOVES IT WHEN YOU WEAR THEM TO WORK IT MAKES HIM SO HAPPY UGHHHHH
BRUH just a sugar daddy at this point “you have to look presentable for the next focus group so here’s a nice rolex watch” “sir, i don’t need-” “ah ah ah - it’s my treat.”
it’s pointless to refuse him but he still teases u for it like what???? “if i didn’t know any better, secretary, i’d say you’re just doing it for my money and not my fabulous looks and personality.” “exactly.” “hey!”
yall go for drinking parties a lot. whether with the whole branch or just the two of u
KARAOKE W KUROO AFTER A LONG DAY OF WORK <333 becomes a ritual between the two of u
he’s so silly when he’s drunk lmfaoooo goofy ass mf
but that’s only when it’s the two of u. he controls his alcohol around others and his uncool side is only for u <3
also ur the only one he trusts to take him back to his place and handle him
it’s the other way around too - when u drink a lot he looks after you <333
you have a higher tolerance than him and sometimes u have competitions between the two of u on who can drink more but then yall always end up shitfaced
HES the one who has a crush on you
you know the drill - gaslight gatekeep girlboss
he’ll do anything for u but wouldn’t ever admit it he simp
offers u the keys to his estate and offers for you to LIVE with him
bruh just marry me already ok WAIT WE’RE NOT EVEN DATING YOU NEED TO WORK ON THAT SIR-
he’s so awkward tryna confess to u,,,he may be this big hotshot ceo but he’s acting like a schoolgirl in love
probably prints u a confession when he asks u to go to the fax machine lmfao what a nerd
in other words ceo!kuroo is a nerd and you need to top him immediately get that bank
dog hybrid!bokuto
we are: owner
Husky-malamute breed!!! BEEG DOGGIE VERY HAPPY N DROOLY <333
OVERLY HYPER. JUMPS ON ANYONE AND U AT ANY GIVEN MOMENT
he’s well trained i swear but the moment he sees something of interest then i’m sorry you just lost him
please if a robber came in he wouldn’t even attack them he’d just tackle them w hugs
he loves loves loves snuggles <333 u busy? nope!!! hug time!!! cooking something?? oo lemme see!!! whoops look at all those tomatos on the ground. u got a deadline coming up and u really need to focus?? CUDDLE TIIIIIIME- w-wait - huh?? why are u shoving me off?? do you - do you not - huh?!?! WHY ARE YOU LOCKING ME OUT OF THE ROOM?? NO!!!! I LOVE YOU!!! IDK WHAT EXAMS ARE BUT I WANT CUDDLES!!! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME????!!!
the WORST things u could ever do to him is leave him and call him a bad boy
HE CRIES ON THE SPOT </3 HOW COULD YOU </3
soso bummed when u go out of the house without him </333 waits by the door patiently waiting for u to come back </333 sob sob
the moment he hears the door unlock he LEAPS and his tail is wagging like CRAZY
he is SO STRONG. almost always knocks u over whenever he jumps on u
destroys EVERY toy u bring him. u leave him for 5 seconds and there’s stuffing all over the floor and whatever u brought him is nonexistent
tugs on the leash when u walk so much that it SNAPS
loves romping w the other dogs in the dog park but he needs to tone down on his friendliness he almost killed a lil orange chihuahua
gets distracted by EVERYTHING. ooh, squirrel! oo, butterfly! OOO HUMAN CHILD!! MUST EAT!!!
ok while he might be friendly, he still gets super super jealous. you both were outside and u were petting the neighborhood black cat and bruh almost swallowed his head
which u thought was weird bc the two are normally friends and are pretty nice around each other
so now he’s more feisty around him and any other cat that’d get ur attention
If it was a person, then that’s another thing. He’d be very friendly at first but then slowly realize that ur attention is more directed on them than him. then he’d go ballistic
but when u scold him for practically assaulting the poor dude and call him a bad boy,,,he’s lost it
u have to lock him in the other room and he’s crying and whimpering, scratching at the door. all he wanted to do was protect u from that bad bad man who took away his owner’s attention !!!
def snarls at the dude next time he comes into ur house/apartment...dude never came back
“GRRR” “AAAA GET UR FRIGGIN DOG B-” “he don bite” YES IT DO GET UR-”
doggie bokuto rlly tries to be slick...it doesn’t work. like he tries to do that thing when he’s a total demon towards the guy but then act like an angel around u but it doesnt work bc he’s not smooth
doggie intelligence: 2 IQ. one time u got him a puzzle box and hid a treat in it but bruh couldnt figure it out just straight up monched the entire puzzle simply bc he smelled his fav bbq treat in it
speaking of intelligence - he only knows how to say a few words like ur name and incomplete sentences. speaks in barks and whines and sometimes a word
SO BIG THAT HE GRABS FOOD FROM THE TABLE WHEN YOU’RE NOT LOOKING
u had some delicious beef steak? oh dear, where did it go? there’s ur puppy kou with steak sauce all over his lips
big fan of hiking trips, sports, literally anything that involves going out
he LOVES getting dirty outside playing. boi cant control himself from rolling around in the mud
hates baths at first but then he likes how u spray the water on him and giggles awww he likes bath time now
we all know he’s not the brightest pup of the pack but,,,he’s somehow psychic. he knows when ur taking him to the vet
HE THROWS A BIG FUSS ALL THE TIME - sometimes he tries to hide but his huge tail under the couch gives it away
and he knows when ur thinking of taking him on a walk. he also begs u to take him outside by settling his head in ur lap and pouting until u give him what he wants
he likes the big ol doggie sweaters/pjs u buy him...but he always ruins them. no matter how much u buy him, they’re all ruined. he complains how scratchy it is and it feels weird on him
knows LOTS of tricks but if u teach him more than what he already knows he will forget one of them he’s like a damn pokemon
he feels ur emotions :((( if ur mood is down his tail droops :(( and he gives u cuddles and tries to make u feel better
he even likes to make a fool out of himself and be silly if it makes u laugh :((( he’s so precious
in other words i love doggy bokuto
pirate!ushijima
we are: kidnapped
ah yes we’re are captives of the most fearsome pirates of the seas: shiratorizawa
just so you know, tendou was the instigator. he was all “let’s kidnap a noble’s kid and get the ransom money!” (whether you actually are a noble or not is up to you)
thing is, nobody’s willing to pay (if you aren’t a noble) or the pirates really pissed off the folks in charge and are now doing a manhunt
so yeah you aren’t going back anytime soon
but he’s a pretty good sport about it - very hospitable
he notices the little things u like and gets them for u <333 sighs <333
he saw you reading that book? wow look at that, there’s suddenly a stack of them and the same genre he saw you reading
but you definitely shouldn’t test him. he’s SUPER scary when it comes down to it
you saw how ruthless he was with the rogues that had dared to challenge him on sea
mf made them walk the plank
you help on the ship bc u wanna be useful and also shirabu keeps being mean
he asks u to teach the crew how to read cuz theyre dumb as shit and only know water and treasure
speaking of treasure - when he leaves u on the ship to explore a cave, he gets u really pretty jewelry <33 anything u ask for
“oh, welcome back captain. how was your mission?” “i brought back a few trinkets i thought you might like.” *reveals whole chest of priceless gems* “are they to your liking? if not, we can set sail for something else that might interest you.” “I-”
bruh got a pet eagle - u ask the crew and they dont even know how tf it happened
hell, even he doesn’t know how it happened wtf. “oh. one day it flew down to me and i fed it. that’s all.” wtf
equivalent to diluc’s bird - he didn’t even give it a name so he gives u the honors
U name him rigatoni (you got a great naming sense btw)
oh my god oh my god oh my god HE TRIES TO PROTECT U WHEN PPL WERE TRYNA INVADE THE SHIP
it was the first thing he did no cap - burst into ur room and scoops u up <33333
“what the-” “we need to get you to safety. we are under attack.” and holds u close to his chest AAAHSIDHFPSDHFN OH MY LORD YES
HAS THE TEAM GIVE U SELF DEFENSE LESSONS AFTER THAT
tendou tries to give u a sword but ushi says no “she could hurt herself.”
“but ushiwaka! we can teach her not to hurt herself” “...it’s my orders.” “c’mon, be more honest, ushiwaka! what’s the real reason?”
he goes quiet then looks at u “...i’ll always be there to help. she’ll have me.” AOISHSDHFSNDF
HELPPPPP SIOJFDSKFJP HES SO CHARMING AND HE DOESNT EVEN TRY
but the rest of the crew are like “then what’s the point”
but tendou sneaks u a dagger just to be safe
sorry ur apart of the crew now - but they’re like a family even if they did kidnap u
oh whatever your life before wasn’t as cool as this (no offense)
they are given orders to protect u at all costs
speaking of which - ushi isn’t all that great w guns
almost blew his own head off tryna figure out how it works before reon snatched it from him
he brings you with him to towns and cities and he likes taking u to the markets to get you stuff
ushijima tell me your love language is gift-giving without telling me your love language is gift-giving-
he finds out you’re pretty good at bargaining and brings you onshore a lot more
is mesmerized at how you absolutely BERATE the merchant who was tryna rip you off like sis where is this violence coming from??? he loves it??
he also likes to stop by some pretty islands and imagines just settling down in such a nice place w you <333 SIGHS <333 VERY <333 LOUDLY <333
no matter how much he likes you...he will NOT let you drive the boat under any circumstances </3 its his livelihood c’mon man
whenever you have to stay on the ship while he’s away he sends rigatoni to give messages and the two of u talk thru messages
speaking of which rigatoni is fierce and can definitely sink his talons and his sharp beak into any bastard that dares get near you while the captain is away
wakatoshi “swimming is for pussies” ushijima - he’s water resistant
bruh so powerful he walks on water
second coming of christ who
IM JUST KIDDING he does swim but we hardly ever see it
legends say (tendou says) he looks rlly awkward doing it and only knows how to doggie paddle
speaking of our homeboy tendou - he loooves spooking the team (and especially you) with scary stories . don’t worry tho - this is all a ploy to get the beeg pirate husband to comfort u at night ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) he is ur wingman u can count on him. but his suggestions are ridiculous
“Jump off the deck and see if he’ll catch you!” um excuse me- THOU SHALT NOT PUT BIG HUSBAND TO THE TEST
he’s got good intentions...i think…
but everyone literally knows he would dive after you
in other words pirate!ushijima is a softie at heart but goddamn he probably secretly has a pet shark so dont test him or u goin overboard
mafia leader!kita
we are: associate from different group/family
kita highly respects u and yall have been acquainted since u were young with the alliance of ur families
so in a way ur childhood friends but yall do have lil bit of friendly rivalry a bit
arranged marriage whuuuutttt...yeah thats what happened but u love him <3
nobody else knows about ur arranged marriage but you two
POLITE GENTLEMAN <333 !!! HNNNNNNNN his granny raised him right even tho he’s a mafia leader
RICH BOY RICH BOY RICH BOY- ALWAYS DRESSES DASHINGLY AND SMELLS GREAT MMMMMM
he owns the majority of the underground casinos
and has lots of connections with others. countless, might i add.
you on the other hand specialize as an arms dealer so he cherishes your services the most
prob has the traditional tattoos allllll over his back and shoulders w like a dragon or sm and def a fox or kitsune
when u two were little he asked ur favorite flower and GOT THAT TATTOOED ON HIS BACK <3 probably secretly has your initials hidden in there somewhere
u both have a silent understanding of each other and he talks to u more than he does anyone
before he used to smoke but once he figured out that you didn’t like the smell of cigarettes he quit just like that
his underlings, the miya twins are so confused on how kita switches from totally brutal and ruthless to so soft around u
they can’t tease him for it, though, cuz he’d pulverize them
but they want to know more about u,,,you mysterious enigma,,,but kita would kill them if they dared asked about you
so they go to inarizaki’s most secretive informant/cyber mercenary, suna rintarou
and suna knows all about you. he saw you one time and he was curious about who you were and is now rlly scared of you because he dug too deep and you’ve got LOTS of history
he doesn’t dare tell the twins what he found no matter how much they bug him
until they bribe him at just the right price
and when aran finds out and tells kita?? ohhh boy it’s lights out for all three of them
oh my god ,,, would kill for u he loves u so much
one time you were kidnapped and held hostage
bro saw red
MAFIA ANNIHILATION SPEEDRUN ANY % NO GLITCH
he got world record time
wiped out the entire conglomerate behind it - nothing and nobody left behind after that
and of course, made sure you were safe.
yandere? ofc not...i mean...just look at him...so innocent...he would never...sharpening that knife...with splattered blood all over him...
is now joined at the hip with u,,,no matter how much you tell him you’ll be fine now and that you have tons of reliable bodyguards he won’t let it go
“don’t you have to go back to your place?” “this is my duty as both a fellow associate and your future husband.” aww,,,ur so sweet...but BRUH PLEASE GO HOME ARAN IS DOING EVERYTHING OVER THERE
makes sure to build a headquarters DIRECTLY NEXT TO YOURS so that its faster
and it’s not long until he just signs a deal to merge ur factions together (since yall getting married anyways)
and oh my god...ur underground wedding is SO SO PRETTY
absolutely DOESN’T care if he’s smuggling jewels from different countries - he’s having your ring CUSTOM MADE and the way you want it. “the diamond is too small? sure thing, darling, i’ll have it 7 times that size.”
makes sure everything is perfect in ur wedding <333 its very extravagant and even though its not really his style he’ll do anything for you
he absolutely WOULD take your last name if you wanted. FIGHT ME ON THIS
takes you to his private island for ur honeymoon so that the two of you don’t have to worry about work
meanwhile aran is scrambling around the place trying to cover for the both of you
he’s a VERY romantic husband - NEVER takes off his ring even for security. he says its practically a part of him just like you are <3
the ring has a built in tracker connected to an app. possessive? noooo...
in other words this escalated pretty quickly but i aint complaining if it gets me married to kita
--
--EXTRA EXTRA!! other characters’ roles!!--
officer!daichi:
karasuno squadron consists of:
cops: daichi (duh), asahi (mostly patrol, he hates confrontation), tanaka & noya (mostly accompanied by ennoshita), hinata & kageyama
investigators/detectives: sugawara, ennoshita, yamaguchi, tsukishima, kiyoko, yachi
surveillance: narita, kinoshita, tsukishima too
househusband!oikawa:
makki and mattsun are also househusbands
iwaizumi is a malewife fhasodjkasdhf-
ceo!kuroo:
lev is the newbie that walked in on u two-
janet still a bitch
kenma is his fellow ceo buddy. he also owns a multimillion dollar company and kuroo’s and his have a sort-of contract so you see him a lot in meetings
yaku is like one of the top performing managers so whenever yall have branch meetings he’s there
dog hybrid!bokuto:
kuroo is the black neighborhood cat bokuto almost murdered cough cough i did that on purpose yes i did
kenma is also another neighborhood cat. you don’t see him around that often but now that bokuto got jealous he stays far away.
hinata is the orange chihuahua i briefly mentioned
i couldn’t decide whether akaashi would stay human and be his previous owner or also be a cat/dog/owl. so lets say he’s ur human friend that is your bestie and comes over a lot. bokuto likes him, though. still gets jealous a bit.
pirate!ushijima:
tendou is practically is right hand man
the rest of the team have something to give idk how to explain pirate team members okay-
BUT BUT BUT- they do have sea rivals which are the seijoh pirates. you ran into them one day and oikawa thought you were kidnapped (you were, but you liked it there) so he tried to do you justice and failed miserably. ushijima ragdolled him into the ocean when he flirted w you.
mafia!kita:
the twins are something akin to mercenaries basically. or just plain lackeys.
suna is an informant/cyber mercenary. he gathers information about ppl which is how he knew about you. and he’s a hacker lol.
aran is his second-in-command, omimi + ginjima are his bodyguards
a/n: im going to regret posting this
#haikyuu#haikyuu headcanons#haikyuu x you#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu captains#daichi sawamura#oikawa toru#kuroo tetsuro#kita shinsuke#ushijima wakatoshi#bokuto kotaro#x reader
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Synopsis of Jay's Empire AU⚡⚡
[[Made by me and @culturalmochi ]]
The way it starts out is that Jay goes on a solo mission, finds the hard drive for Prime Empire, and gets trapped in the game.
Nobody knows where he went, so the ninja are desperately trying to find him.
Time in game moves a lot faster than in real life, so a few weeks for the ninja is a few months (close to a year) inside of the game.
Jay met Scott and he showed him the ropes of the game, but tried to subtly warn him about Unagami. Jay spent a lot of time leveling up and grinding so he could get high stats, but later found out that he wasn't able to leave or communicate with the outside world. Enter Unagami.
Unagami tells Jay that he sees potential in him, and that he's impressed with his progress through the game. They begin to have a sort of mentor/mentee kind of relationship.
Once again, time moves much faster in game. So jay starts to miss the real world and tells Unagami that he misses his friends. Unagami tells Jay, "if they were really your friends, they would have come back for you by now, wouldn't they?"
Later on, Jay is approached by none other than the ninja! His dearest friends finally coming back to rescue him and bring him home!
But as he spends more time with them, something feels... wrong. It turns out they're NPC's, and in his mission objective list, it says he has to "discard" them. So he does, and they crumble into little pixelated cubes. He levels up.
This repeats several times, each time the ninja dupes become more rude, indifferent, hateful. At some point they become so far removed from their true counterparts that the only thing in common they share is their appearances.
Then comes the time where Unagami is ready to open the game to the rest of the world. He brings Jay to help him spread the word by broadcasting an advertisement for Prime Empire.
That's when the ninja find out where Jay has been this whole time.
So the real gang enters Prime Empire and find Jay, who looks displeased to see them even if he tries to hide it.
Everyone is so happy to see him and to bring him out of the game, surrounding him with hugs and tears of joy.
But then Jay checks his objectives. "Discard the ninja". It's the same as it's always been, so he goes along with it.
But as Jay journeys with his friends through the game, he slowly comes to the realization that they aren't NPC's.. they're his real friends.
Scott, when he was first sucked in by the game, leveled up really fast and eventually gained the attention of Unagami. Unagami said he saw "great potential" in him and gave him access to the coding of the game. For Scott, this means he can essentially influence and change parts of the game, but not always by his own free will. With him being connected to the coding, that includes his thoughts, emotions, memories, trauma, etc. this connection also gave Unagami a way to keep track of where Scott was and what he was doing at all times.
so eventually, Unagami wants to bring empire to the physical world, but he needs help getting the world out. he tells Scott his plan and Scott is like "actually, fuck this :)" and escapes from Unagami. in order to keep him from tracking his every move, Scott cuts off his own connection to the game's code. He hunkers down in his hideout and tries to plot a way to a)escape and b)prevent Unagami from taking over the real world.
so finally, Jay enters the game! Scott finds him running away from red visors and picks him up and takes him to his hideout. Scott explains the general rules of the game, gives him tips on how to survive, glitches, cheats, all of it. but he tries to warn him about Unagami and Jay is too enraptured with the thrall of the game to pay any mind to Scott's warnings. Jay starts leveling up and progressing, very similar to how Scott did, and gained the same kind of attention from Unagami. he saw great potential in him. at that point, Scott says that Jay can't come to the hideout anymore, and Jay asks why. Scott says "i already told you, but you didn't listen to me." and so Jay goes to Unagami. Unagami promises him steep advantages in the game, protection, etc and Jay is going along with it because, to him, its still just a game. the gravity of the situation hasn't quite hit him yet. he doesn't know that he's trapped.
so now, Jay and Unagami have a sort of mentor/mentee kind of relationship, and Jay very much fits into the role of the teachers pet. the red visors are **VERY** protective of him and will often accompany him wherever he goes unless he tells them to leave (sometimes they listen, sometimes they dont). There is one red visor who is particularly close to Jay. she goes with him everywhere and is the most protective of him compared to the other RV's. Jay tries to talk with her sometimes, and one day he asks her what her name is. her voice glitches out a lot, like something is corrupted in her code. she repeats "four o-oh four-r-r AA e-rror-r four o-o-oh four-r AA" and Jay is like "hmm.. rora? can i call you rora?" and she just nods at him. (Rora becomes important later!!)
so anyways, going back to how Unagami has adopted Jay as his mentee, Jay has the same kind of access to the game's coding that Scott does. including the influence of his memories and past traumas. this manifests in several ways, but one of which is how the NPC clones of the ninja interact with him. Jay has a lot of issues with self esteem and often fears that nobody really cares about him, finds him annoying, etc. so with each iteration of the ninja dupes, they become meaner and meaner until the only resemblance they share to their irl counterparts is their physical appearance.
Jay (not realizing that Unagami is the one creating the dupes) goes to Unagami to vent about how he misses his friends and wishes they could join him in the game. Unagami tells Jay "if they were really your friends, they would have come for you by now. They probably forgot about you. but it's not you ever needed them anyways. here, you are powerful, loved by everybody, adored by the masses. in here, you are important." gotta love that gaslight gatekeep gameboss moment. eventually, Unagami is ready to bring prime empire to the physical world once he's seen Jay get to the same point that Scott was at. Unagami says that he needs Jays help to deliver the message, and that crossing the line between digital and physical means that Jay can go back to the real world while still maintaining the same power and reputation he has in the game. Jay agrees and works with Unagami to make an advertisement.
this is the advertisement script:
[Do you want to join Prime Empire?
“What is Prime Empire?” it’s a fully immersive, futuristic video game experience! Using the latest virtual emulation technology, players are quite literally part of the game. Customize your avatar, meet other players, level up, and compete in tournaments!
“But how do I join?” The answer is simple, silly! Prime Empire can be found in your arcades, in your consoles, even on your phones! You would have to live under a rock to not find your way in.
“How do I win?” Your quest is to seek out the legendary Keytanas. But be warned, there are challenges that you will face. Deadly forests, dangerous races, and more! Will you rise above the rest and claim your rightful victory?
Join today, but don’t delay! Only the first 100 players will get a chance to meet yours truly (winks). In the Super Star Rocking Jay event, I will teach you the ropes of the game, along with exclusive tips that will give you an advantage over other players!
Do you have what it takes? Prove your worth and become part of Prime Empire!]
however, Scott has caught wind of the ad, and so he hacks into the broadcast and tries to warn everybody to "STAY OUT OF PRIME EMPIRE!!" but once again, his warnings fall on deaf ears.
however, now the ninja know where Jay has been all this time! they manage to be part of the 1st 100 players in the game and go to the super star rocking Jay event. Kai, Nya, Lloyd, Cole, pixal and zane all get in the game. but due to their own coding, pixal and zane despawn and get plopped back in the real world within the first 10mins of the game. They spend a lot of time outside of prime empire trying to find ways to re-enter the game.
so now we finally get to when the (remaining) ninja meet up with Jay, and he is disappointed at best when he sees them. but when they surround him with love and hugs and tears of joy, it throws him off guard. all of the NPC's were never this kind to him. He checks his objective menu and a new notification shows up. "discard the ninja". same as it's always been. part of the objective has always been to "not let the ninja know that you know they are fakes." but after all of this time, Jay has grown tired and so he doesn't really bother trying to keep up appearances. he won't flat out say that he thinks they're fakes, but his demeanor is completely off.
the ninja make it to okino and they start going through the forest, the cliffs, and finally the maze of the red dragon. throughout this time, there are several little moments that lead Jay to believe that these might be his real friends. he tries to write them off, but it keeps nagging at him. in the canon scene where Unagami pauses the game and talks to okino, its the same except its Jay that Unagami talks to. "just wanted to check in with you, everything is still going according to plan, correct?" Jay responds with "yes, but these ones are different. none of the other clones have acted so.. so close to my real friends." Unagami scoffs "these ones are just as fake as the others. make sure you complete your objective. we are very close to bridging the gap, and I wouldn't want anybody to hold you back from being at my side when we cross over." Jay agrees and the game resumes.
Jay has the perfect opportunity to let his friends perish at the hands of the dragon, but something in him screams at him to help them win. he points out the scale on the back of the dragon, they defeat it, and Jay gets the dragon summon. instead of keeping it, he gives it to Cole. "i figure you guys will probably need it more than me. I've got higher stats, i can take care of myself." (that dragon summon becomes important later) so ANYWAY now its time for the speedway 5billion. but they don't have enough credits so they have to get some extra money. the gang goes to the dance battle, but! theres also a karaoke battle they have to participate in. Jay and Cole sing Everybody Wants To Rule The World by Tears for Fears (this song is also important later!) and they win the contest and get enough credits to enter the race. however...
by this point in time, Jay is pretty sure that this group is his **real** friends, and he doesn't feel like he can go through with his objective anymore. besides, would clones really dance with him? sing his favorite songs with him? watch out for him when danger approaches? smile at him with such kindness and sincerity? clones wouldnt, but his real friends would. once again, his connection to the code means that Unagami is able to track him, and also take peeks into his mind. Unagami senses this realization and pauses the game again to confront him. "Jay, you must not let these clones cloud your judgement. you still have a mission to complete." Jay says "Unagami, these aren't dupes! they're really my friends, and they came back for me! i can't just "discard" them like you want me to. I won't!" "you WILL if you ever want to leave this digital space. if you will not join me in bridging the gap, then you will be left in here for all of eternity. the choice is yours, Jay walker." and with that, the game resumes.
the ninja are all talking and they realize that Jay has gone silent. "Jay? you good?" Kai asks. Jay snaps out of it and reassures them that he's fine. but thats when he sees *him*. in the crowd of NPC's bustling about the city, he sees nadakhan. staring at him with that evil, calculated grin and begins approaching them. Jay's eyes go wide and his stomach drops. "are you sure you're okay?" Lloyd asks. "we.. we need to get out of here. we need to leave *now*" Jay says with a quiet, wavering voice. Just as he moves to flee, Nya gasps.
It was the scene of Nya dying. She was cradled in Jay's arms, muttering her last words before going completely limp. The master of lightning shook with broken sobs, clinging to his friend as if holding her tight enough could bring her back. That was the day that Jay Walker had lost everything.
And now, that moment was set on an infinite loop, broadcasted on every screen in the capital city of Prime Empire.
Jay was frozen, unable to do anything but succumb to his rising panic.
Nya was in a similar state, feeling the sharp pains of her chest that came from her old wound. She remembered dying, the pain and vulnerability. Now her final moments were in full display.
The rest of them gazed in horror and confusion, unable to comprehend what was going on. Jay thinks he heard Kai yelling, maybe he was asking why his sister was dying over and over again. Cole sounded like he was trying to warn everyone about the approaching assailants. Those of which looked like clones of the Misfortune's crew, including their tyrannical captain.
It was all too much. Jay felt his digital blood freeze in his veins, his air cutting off entirely, and his vision slowly turning to static.
Nadakhan. Nya. Tiger widow venom. Kai. Nadhakan. Nya. Zane. Cole. Nya. Lloyd. Nadakhan. Nya. Nya. Nya. N-
Jay's friends tried to reach for him, to help him, but then it happened.
An explosion of lightning burst from Jay's body, flooding through the city with blue and white pixelated sparks. And once the wave had passed, the city went dark. The screens that were looping that wretched day were now idle. The Misfortune's crew were nowhere to be seen. Jay had fallen unconscious.
"What are you guys doing here?" Scott asked, his face contorted in concern.
"Scott, it- its Jay. He had this weird power surge and he-" Lloyd stuttered before him and his friends were roughly yanked inside of Scott's hideout.
Cole was carrying Jay's limp body, and followed Scott's instructions to lay him on the workbench. But not before he had thrown all of his tools and blueprints on the ground in a rush.
"What did you say? About a power surge?"
"It was-" Lloyd started again
"It was like he exploded," Kai cut in, "we've never seen his element act like that."
"The city, it went dark." Nya added.
"And there was something going on with the city screens, they were showing-" said Cole.
"My sister dying! Over and over again! That's not part of the game, right?!"
"Guys guys! Chill the fuck out, one at a time." Scott demanded. They all went quiet before Nya spoke up.
"The screens showed one of Jay's memories. One of his most traumatic ones. NPC's started changing into people that.. are related to that memory. They started attacking us from all sides. Jay had gone into a panic attack before he surged. That wave of power blew out the whole city's power and everything went dark. After that he passed out."
Scott looked at her with a look of dread.
"This is worse than I thought.."
"What do you mean worse? Scott, what's wrong with Jay?" Cole asked. Scott sighed.
"He's.. he's become part of the game."
"Like an NPC?" Lloyd said.
"No, not an NPC. His memories, his soul, his life force- it's bleeding into the coding of the game. His emotions and memories are able to affect the behavior of the game. Environments, NPCs, everything."
"How do you know all of that, Scott?" Nya interjected.
"Because he's just like me."
"What??" The ninja said in unison.
"When I first came into the game, Unagami wanted me to bring Prime Empire to the real world. To break out of this digital prison and conquer the rest of the physical world. I agreed to help him because I didn't see any other way out of this hellscape. He granted me access to the code. So I'm just as connected to Prime Empire as Jay is. My memories are there too.
But the thing is, is that I've cut myself off of the code. It's the only way I could hide from Unagami, since I had abandoned ship and didn't want to help him anymore. I'm a threat because I can affect the code.
But if I don't connect to it, I stay hidden.
But Jay, his connection is so strong by this point. Everything he does changes the game.
He's gonna be okay, for now, but I can't guarantee the same for all of you." Scott finished, his eyes sunken and tired.
"Wh- what are we supposed to do then? How can we get Jay out of here?" Kai asked.
"Beat the game. As far as I know, there's no other way out of here."
They all looked at each other, faces grim but determined.
"Well we can't leave here without Jay, can we stay here until he wakes up?" Said Nya.
"Absolutely not." Scott replied.
"What? Why??" Cole butted in.
"The longer you guys stay here, with h i m, the more danger all of us are in. Jay is part of the coding, Unagami can find him. And that means he can find u s."
"Well how do we wake him up? There's gotta be some way!" Lloyd pleaded.
Scott looked at Jay's unconscious form.
"Fuck, okay, let me try something."
so Scott does the only thing he can think of that might work. he reconnects himself to the game's code in order to "plug in" to Jay and wake him up. when he plugs in, Scott sees Jay in a dark, endless room. he's crouched on the ground, sobbing and shaking
But thrashing from his body is manifestations of his trauma, like a horrible amalgamation that is distorting his physical form and its. Horrifying.
Scott looks at him and tries to approach him without getting hurt
He gets to him and he makes contact with his shoulder and then the surge of energy happens and he gets unplugged and shot across the room, and Jay wakes up with a start, chest heaving and his eyes still wet with tears. Cole is there right next to Jay, and Jay clings onto him like a lifeline. Kai wraps his arms around Jay too and they hold him and comfort him as best they can. Lloyd and Nya go over to Scott to see if he's okay. he groans and sits up, Lloyd and Nya help him stand. "what happened? what was that??" Nya asks. "I woke him up. but its not safe anymore. you guys have to get him out of here, or else Unagami is gonna show up and if he does.. well its safe to assume it'll be game over for all of us."
"we still have to win the highway 5billion and get the second keytana." Cole says, "and we need cars." Scott sighs at this, "i've got cars you can use, i won't be using them very much anymore anyways." "what does that mean?" Kai asks. "did you not hear me? its game over. you guys have to get Jay out of here." Scott says. "Scott, you know the game better than anyone, we need your help. will you race with us?" Nya pleads. Scott is about to reject when he looks at Jay. Jay is looking at him with a look that breaks his heart. "fine. I'll race with you guys."
so they fix up the cars and enter the SW5B and Scott is like "i guess if we're going in, i might as well get a new look." so he customizes his avatar (if u check my post with his redesign, thats the avatar he has, the glowing parts of his outfit change colors!) and they start the race! Scott doesn't have his own car, instead he's jumping from vehicle to vehicle and taking out the other drivers so that the ninja can win. he uses his baseball bat as a melee weapon but it can also shoot lasers! Kai still gets that loot box upgrade and has the running mech, and just like in canon, Cole and Kai get cubed. so does Scott, he gets run over lol. now its just Jay, Nya, and Lloyd and they make their way to the temple of madness.
then we have the fight. in canon its Lloyd and harumi, but in this au, Jay enters the arena instead. he gets in and the game picks his fighter. expecting it to be someone he's fought before, he prepares himself. but nothing could have prepared him for who he saw standing in front of him. it was echo zane.
Nya stares in horror and Lloyd is confused. "who is that? that can't be zane, right? why would he be part of the game?" Lloyd asks. Nya can't say anything, and neither can Jay. Jay wants to give up, he cant fight echo. someone who helped him in the most dire of times, only to be left alone on that island for the rest of eternity. Jay had never gone back for him, and that guilt he felt had just kicked into high gear having to look echo in the eyes. but then echo starts attacking him, and Jay has to defend himself. Jay wins, and sees echo disappear after the final blow. the walls of the arena disappear and Jay falls to his knees. Lloyd and Nya move in immediately to help him up. "seriously, what the hell is going on?? why aren't you guys saying anything??" Lloyd demands. "we can't talk about it right now, Lloyd. we'll have to tell you later." Nya says quietly. her voice is tight and dies in her throat. Lloyd gets the hint and doesn't push it any further.
so the three of them make it through the sushi restaurant and make it to the gate with the 3 keytanas. Jay, Lloyd, and Nya go to put in the blades and they open the gate. standing in front of them is none other than Unagami. "Jay, you have disappointed me. you were so important, so valued, and you have thrown that away for the sake of your so-called 'friends'. thankfully, there is still a place for you." Unagami says. "i don't WANT a place with you! you've hurt me, you've hurt my friends, you've hurt so many innocent people. all of those cubes? those are REAL PEOPLE! i can't let you do this Unagami. I won't let you get away with this." Jay says defiantly. Unagami sighs, "i was hoping it would not come to this. but if you chose to act this way, you will face the consequences. you will help me bridge this gap, whether you like it or not." and Unagami holds out his hands. an intense blue beam of light bursts from his palms and hits Jay square in the chest. the light is absorbed by his body and his form begins to glitch and spasm violently. mochi and i have called this the Blue Screen of Death. (tw for mild(?) body horror) Jay is overcome by the blue and his body begins to grow and distort, all the while he's screaming and his cries are glitched out and staticky. Lloyd and Nya watch, frozen in fear as their friend begins to grow to massive size, writhing in agony. Jay thrashes and knocks into both of them, sending them off the side of the platform and cubing them. the last two energy cubes join the gate and Jay crawls through.
(with this scene, in the background, the lorde version of everybody wants to rule the world would be playing, just as a nice parallel to the song from earlier at the karaoke battle)
MEANWHILE, as pixal and zane attempted to find ways to get back into the game, find milton dyer, etc, zane gets captured by the mechanic. everything goes the same as it does in canon where the mechanic hooks zane up to the gate.
and now, we get a look at where everybody who got cubed resides. Scott, when he was cubed, was greeted by Unagami personally. he criticized him for his actions and expressed his disappointment before ultimately locking him inside of a digital cell. Scott figured that this was how the rest of his life would be, trapped in a cage with no way out and no way to die. but then! Rora shows up. that corruption in her system from the beginning? that was her beginning to break away from her coding and becoming more of a person. she saw what happened to Jay, and she wants to help him. she breaks Scott out and they agree to work together to save Jay. but they're gonna need all the help they can get. together, Scott and rora free the ninja and all of the other cubed players and they make it through the portal.
and thats where they see Jay, now as tall as the skyscrapers in ninjago city and wreaking havoc on the entire area.
everyone looks up at him in utter horror and see just how corrupted he's become. he's wailing in pain as he drives his guitar down on building after building. thrashing and flailing, causing the structures around him to crumble and collapse. "how the fuck are we gonna fix this?!" Nya cries. "i can help." Unagami approaches them. everyone gets into fighting stances, ready to beat Unagami into the pavement. "i did not realize that corrupting him would turn out like this. i know how to fix him, but i need your help." "why should we help YOU?" Kai growls. "if you want to save your city and your friend from complete destruction, you *will* help me." and so Unagami explains that if they can lure Jay back through the portal, Unagami can undo his corruption and fix Jays "coding"
so now the ninja are trying to figure out how to get Jay's attention and bring him back through the portal. it seems like nothing is working, and then Cole gets an idea. he starts singing the lyrics to everybody wants to rule the world. it seems to get Jay's attention, so he keeps singing.
the others hear him and they join in. now they have Jay's attention, and he's closing in on them. that dragon summon from earlier? now thats when that comes in handy. Cole calls the digidragon and rides it so that Jay cant crush him while he lures him back to the portal. low and behold, they manage to get Jay through the portal, Unagami purifies his "coding" and they return to the physical world once again. Unagami gets to have his talk with milton and all of the npcs+pcs that want to come out do, and the others stay in the game. the city is in shambles, the portal closes, and zane+pixal+wu reunite with the others.
the car ride home is very quiet. everyone is exhausted, Jay is asleep and leaning on Cole's shoulder. they have a lot to talk about, but for now, they just want to sleep through the night. they make it home, go to their separate rooms, and go to bed.
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand thats pretty much all of it!! theres a little epilogue that has snippets of what Scott, racer 7, okino, and rora do now that they're outside of the game, but thats just kinda there lol.
#ninjago#ninjago au#ninjago Jay's empire au#jay walker#kai smith#cole brookstone#lloyd garmadon#nya smith#zane julien#pixal borg#ninjago unagami#ninjago scott#ninjago nadakhan#echo zane#ninjago okino#ninjago racer 7#ninjago oc#ninjago oc rora#master wu#OOF okay this wasn't really beta read but here's the mf synopsis!#polyninja is there if u squint#i haven't talked about this au in forever lmao
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i,, i’m going through an eren brainrot rn and i was hoping if i could request a sub n very needy eren x f!reader. something along the lines of him pissing off the reader and she teases him to the max and eren’s just begginggg ; and then reader gets herself off without letting him release and he’s just cryinG AGGHHABA I HOPE THIS MAKES SENSE <//3 ty have a nice day ≧ω≦
oh lord................................... i have to....................... think alot oh god,,, also college au bc head empty <333
vvv nsfw under the cut vvv
today has been so fucking stressful for you. class has not been treating you well and your asshole of a boyfriend has been acting more like an asshole than usual. you loved him, of course you did, but god did you wish he would shut his fucking mouth sometimes.
you often confided in your dorm-mate, ymir for advice, causing her to just laugh and nudge you with a: “sorry can’t relate, my girlfriend is basically an angel on earth.” to which you respond with a snicker and nudge her back.
you often wished you had what historia and ymir had between them with eren but he had a weird charm that had you fall for him in the first place.
you had a free period sandwiched between two lessons of english literature. so, instead of going back to your dorm for a nap or to the nearest starbucks, you spent it in the library with a classmate of yours. she was quite standoffish when you first met her. a short blond who intimidated nearly everyone around her.
you were one of the few lucky ones who were able to get close to her. the other two being a jock and his sidekick but more into that later.
sighing as your phone buzzed against the wooden table, you saw the multiple notifications from eren pop up on screen. your eye twitched as you tried focusing on studying and annie let out a small chuckle at your reaction.
“problem in paradise?” she mused, watching as you tensed for a second before letting out a deep breath.
“man, i don’t know. i love eren but-” you were about to go on until annie kicked you under the desk, jutting her head towards the right. you furrowed your brows, looking behind you to see your boyfriend enter with his two friends.
“speak of the devil.”
“y/n.” eren smirked, taking a chair and spinning it around, sitting down with his legs on either side. his arms rested on the top of the back of the wooden chair. “whatcha doin’” his head cocked to the side to look at you, like a lost puppy.
his hair was slowly falling out of his bun, causing small strands to frame his face. you would be lying if you said he didn’t look ethereal.
“im studying, jaeger.” you let out, running a yellow highlighter along a few keywords, keeping your eyes on your textbook.
eren rolled his eyes in response, peering over the chair to take a look at your various notes before snorting. “fuckin’ nerd.”
you threw a look over at him. could he not take anything seriously? “don’t you guys have somewhere to be maybe? like i don’t know, catching up with professor erwin?” annie spoke up, causing all of you to have a moment of shock. armin nodded, agreeing with her, tugging on eren’s hood.
“they’re trying to study, c’mon don’t bother them.”
mikasa was silent, giving you an apologising smile.
“bother my own girlfriend? more likely than you think, but yeah, my brother will be on my ass if i miss another fucking meeting.” he sighs, giving you a playful two finger salute before rushing off with the other two. you slumped into your chair.
“sorry annie-”
“just teach him a lesson or something, if you catch my drift.” she mumbles quickly, collecting her stuff. you look at her in surprise.
“what?” she snickers at your reaction, “im not a fucking virgin. time for class.” she mentions, slinging her bag over her shoulder.
“good idea..” you mumble to yourself as she walks off, leaving you to your own thoughts.
good idea indeed.
and eren gave you just the perfect opportunity. he burst in with no knock, no indication he was coming over, nothing.
ymir was spending the night at historia’s so you didn’t have to worry about that.
“eren what the fuck have i told you about coming in unannounced? ymir could’ve been i dont know, getting it on with historia for all you know.” you looked over at him, smiling internally at how he remembered to take his shoes off before joining you on your bed. you were not about to have his dirty ass shoes on your clean bed.
“sorry but to be fair i did see ymir walk into historia’s dorm so i knew you were alone.” he steals your soda to take a sip of it before placing it back on the bedside table.
annie’s words echoed in your head, causing you to jump into action.
you threw yourself over him, straddling his waist as he straightened up, excitement flashing in his eyes at where the night was leading. your threw your arms over his shoulders, shuffling so that you purposefully pressed onto his bulge through his jeans.
he moved forward to catch your lips but you ducked your head, kissing down his cheek and jaw, running your tongue along the skin. your continued down, relishing in the way his hips jutted up once you pressed your lips to that one spot on his neck. you bit and sucked, marking him as yours.
eren’s hands rested at your hips, his fingers digging into your thin tank top.
you spot ymir’s tie on the floor. perfect.
you climb off of him, a quizzical look painting his face as you picked it up along with one of your (clean) socks. the brunet seemed to put two and two together.
“ohhh is that what we’re doing huh baby?” he threw his jacket off along with his shirt, expecting you to stare. however, he got the opposite. you ignored his movements, simply binding his hands to the bed and the using the (CLEAN!!!) sock as a makeshift ballgag.
you were impressed with yourself. taking your phone out to take a quick picture before tossing it away and getting to work.
“you’ve been such a bitch boy for the past few days. why?” you questioned him, enjoying how he struggled to form words with the cloth in his mouth.
“is it because you haven’t got your dick wet in a while? is that it?” you tease, slipping your clothes off, leaving you in your underwear and bra. his eyes trailed your form, every curve and beauty mark. he flicked his eyes from you to his pants, which had a much evident tent in them now.
you gave a little bit of mercy, pulling his jeans off and dragging a palm over his boxers where his cock had already leaked with precum. after a few teasing presses, you give him the relief of taking off his boxers.
you took his dick in your hands, pumping it a few times. you swiped your tongue along the tip, causing him to shudder under you. you stepped out of your panties, letting them drop to the floor. his eyes took notice of your arousal dripping down your thighs. your finger toyed with your clit, spreading your legs for him to see, his cock twitching when you shoved a finger into your cunt.
eren wanted nothing more than to shove his face between your thighs right now. to lap and lick at your juices as you moaned his name. he tugged at the binding, brows furrowing as his cock begged for attention.
you giggled at his neediness, crawling over to him and hovering over his length before fulling sitting down on him. drool split out of his mouth, causing the cloth ti go damp. a dull moan escaping his throat.
you were so hot and tight around him and he couldn’t help but buck his hips upwards into yours. though he easily hit into your sensitive spot.
“holy fuck, you’re so fucking big fuck.” you cursed, lifting yourself before slamming down onto him, causing him to throw his head back at the feeling. the lewd sound of skin on skin echoed throughout your room and whoever walked past would definitely know what was going on.
you continue fucking yourself on his cock, using your fingers to pinch at your clit. the sight alone could’ve made eren cum in you but it was nothing compared to how you creamed around him, your walls pulsing around him. he was literally about to fall off the edge, before you pulled off of him. his cock falling limp as a tiny drop of cum dribbled out of him.
“wha fe hell!” he yelled through the fabric. you pulled the sock in his mouth down, letting him talk freely.
“please y/n! i want to cum! please let me cum!” eren begged, tugging on the bindings harder. “please fuck- i just wanna feel your pretty pussy please.” he pressed on further, causing the corners of your lips to curl up into a teasing smile. his eyes were glassy, tears falling with a single blink. long brown hair sticking to his damp forehead, messy on the pillow under his head.
“sorry baby..” you threw on a hoodie, your panties and some shorts after cleaning yourself up.
“maybe if you weren’t such a little bitchy boy, i would’ve let you cum.” you slid his boxers and jeans back on for him, zipping him up.
“now, you stay here, im gonna get us some pizza, yeah?” you pulled his hair into a bun and loosened the tie around his wrists slightly.
you’ll untie them completely later, but for now, you wanted to have your fun.
#eren smut#timeskip eren smut#eren yeager smut#eren jaeger smut#eren x reader smut#attack on titan smut
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Jespers s/o being an artist/painter?? 👀💅
Painter s/o, Jesper Fahey
thank you for granting me the opportunity to self project onto a request😌🤌
Headcanons, gender neutral pronouns
Tw: shameless self projecting onto a request, sorry not sorry❤️ (also a bit of language)
- Honestly, very impressed???? He won’t stop asking you questions about it, like “How did you do that so quickly?” or “Where did you learn to paint that?” or “Are you painting from the top of your head or from a view?”
- He wants to know so much, but it’s adorable.
- He has very steady hands (obviously), so if he wanted to, he could very easily learn how to paint. You tried to teach him once, but he has no patience when it comes to the drying process. He tried painting over the canvas too quickly after one layer and everything got mixed up in the colors and it was no longer clear what it was. Poor boy got so frustrated he would never paint again.
- But that’s fine. He’s content just watching you (if you let him, because painting under a pair of eyes is very intimidating.)
- And besides, when you have to wait for paint to dry, Jesper sees it as a perfect moment to wrap you in a giant hug, not letting go of you for a while.
- Another thing he loves when you’re waiting for the paint to dry, is when you paint his hands. You have a tiny brush specifically for that. Whatever color you have left on your palet is used to draw little lines and marks on his hands. It’s very soothing for the both of you.
- Jesper loves the tickling of the brush and the cold paint, while you’re happy painting whatever you want on his hand. It’s therapeutic, really.
- Bouncing back on my earlier hickey request; this man will definitely walk up behind you while you’re painting and just place hickeys along your neck. It’s very distracting.
- Will also surprise you with small gifts for your paintings once in a while. He knows how expensive everything is, but he keeps a close eye on all the products you have and what you’re running out of. So before you can even think of getting new paint or brushes etc. he had already gotten them for you.
- You insisted that he doesn’t have to do that (because paint is fucking expensive, and fOR WHAT???) (DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE PRICES FOR GOOD BRUSHES)
- You appreciate it, though. You never mention to him what you need, he just knows it. It’s really cute that he keeps track of these things.
- Sometimes buys paintings from you or pays for a commission. He has three of your paintings in his room already. He even convinced Kaz to hang one of your biggest works in the bar, so it’s pretty special to him.
- Speaking about Kaz: The crows also love your work! Nina and Wylan have no issue praising you for whatever. Matthias often drops in a “This is so beautiful!”, while Inej drops compliments like “You must’ve worked so hard for this! Great job.”
- Kaz is Kaz. He doesn’t really express much for it, but he sometimes sneaks in a small “I like it.”. He also has a great eye for art, although hidden. Sometimes, when you’re busy, he’ll try to advice you thing such as “I think Bordeaux Red would look better on that than Blue.” You can’t tell anyone though, or Kaz’ll cut your hands off.
- Plus, he agreed on hanging your painting in the bar, so that must count for something.
- Jesper often buys cute postcards with a pretty background, dropping them off at your place. You have a box filled with postcards he gave you over the years. It’s really helpful, because many of these postcards give you get some sort of reality in how to paint complicated things (mountains, rivers, clouds etc.)
- Overall really supportive and proud of you. Can’t stop bragging about your art in front of others. He had no shame. Not even when you took him to a museum. Will walk up to random people and say “That’s cool and all, but they can do it even better.”
- Has insulted a lot of art fanatics with remarks like this, so please, pay close attention to him or don’t take him to musea at all.
#jesper fahey#soc#six of crows#shadow and bone netflix#shadow and bone#grishaverse#leigh bargudo#crooked kingdom#kit young#jesper fahey x reader
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