#to heal? idk. i made up a guy to get mad at

[the-meme-monarch]

Wait, what happened to Cap'n's neck? Looking back on the first turntable picture the crack is visible, but nothing is mentioned about it.

it's part of a headcanon/story I'm writing that's very personal to me so I'm not sure I want to share very much other than bits that are maybe funny or out-of-context enough👍 but basically he got strangled and it left marks

[arcadia345]

❃Astrology observations❃

Masterlist

Not a real astrologer just my observations:)

❃ Aquarius moon femmes tend to be more masculine/tomboyish whether it be their personality or fashion sense they prefer loose fitting clothes. They have this nonchalantness/offstandish energy about them, they also are very sensitive and receptive to energies around them esp after one on one interactions but surprisingly do very well w online interactions💀they could feel like their personality shines brighter online than irl

❃ 12th ruler in 7th natal partners could have animosity towards you esp if you prefer men they tend to have secret intentions/lives

❃ Sagittarius in your natal chart is where you tell the best stories, and gemini can show where others ask for advice/tell their best stories to you(and lowkey try to impress you)

♐︎ in 1st -you ARE the story, there’s never a dull moment ,so many memories are made w you, many stories where you had to be reminded that your that GIRL/GUY✨ (esp by your guides)

♐︎ in 8th- they articulate their trauma very well, the ones that talk openly about their abuse, lots of near-death stories, surgery stories that they almost didn’t make it out of, thieving stories

♐︎ in 11th- the type to bring their friends into every situation/story, most likely to do the best story time vids online, their stories can be eye opening for the collective, people love when they predict the future, stories about the future/goals of humanity, evolution stories, stories about you gaining independence(just like 1st)

♐︎ in 12th- they love to hear about your dreams and conspiracies, they love when you talk about your insecurities and spill your own secrets, your paranormal experiences and things about past lives

♊︎ in 2nd- they love to tell you how hard they work for their assets, “You know I haven’t told anyone this but I feel like I can trust you.” They don’t mind telling you about their illegal activities, people have a tendency to think you took something from them, they come to you for advice on how to approach situations

♊︎ in 5th- the type to have kids come up to them and all their parents business (4th house also), the best childhood memory stories, people try to impress you w their sex stories , they come to you for advice on sex and love matters also, asking for your opinion w fashion & aesthetics, you make them want to try new things🥵

❃ Taurus in the 3rd/4th find it hard to leave their family/home

Cancer risings (4°16°28°) their face and body fluctuate through life but their faces tend to get rounder/fuller as they age

❃ Sending love out to Venus in Pisces/12th house natals y’all are what fairytales are made of🥺 just being in your presence is healing even tho they feel sometimes their deepness and devotion isn’t reciprocated at times idk who needed to hear this but your loving energy transcends the physical barriers you could do a lot of energy work on the other side w/o even realizing it esp while sleeping🧡

❃ I feel bad for Chloe because w that Gemini mars baby everybody always gonna think you doing too much😭 unti you don’t do enough & they’ll still be mad

Finding out Lil uzi has a Gemini mars sent me💀 it reminds of them vids of their security guard trying to keep up w them while they jump all over the place🕺🏽

❃ Sag moon children mom was in her hoe phase when u were conceived. Partying/traveling/drinking/learning was prominent for her at the time

Venus in natal can show you why others envy you

♀ in 2nd- they envy how consistently you upkeep yourself, they see how much money you put into yourself to look good, they hate how materially abundant you are, how easily you make money from your talents/assets, they envy your sugar daddy/baby energy

♀ in 4th- they envy how abundant your family/ancestry is, they envy your mom/your motherly skills, how easily you make a house feel like home, how rich your inner world is, your decoration sense, how easily you’ll be remembered after passing/leaving home, how easily you make money from home

♀ in 8th- they envy how easily others trust you esp w their money & possessions, how beautifully you shed your skin in transformations, sugarbaby placement, how magnetic you are, how easily people become obsessed w you, your way of love making/showing love/spoiling others or vise versa

♀ in 12th- a lot of people don’t even realize that they envy you/ subconsciously send you evil eye, you provoke their hidden desires(this place def has lots of people in their circle wishing on their downfall) they envy how content you are with yourself /and how you’ve healed yourself , your music taste

I feel like prominent Pisces placements tend to lose their teeth more often than Capricorns, could also have dreams of teeth falling out/rotting

❃ Prominent Virgo in natal stay cleaning up other people’s 💩💀 like literally tho at some point in your life you’ve had to be some type of caretaker ie. animals, elderly, babies. But 💩 is more prominent/consistent in your life

But if ur a pet owner or caretaker in general you know that a lot of times the only way they can communicate what’s going on w their body Is through their bowel movements so it’s a blessing and a curse cuz it’s not like your obsessed with 💩 (unless👀) but you kinda have to be😭

Aphrodite in Gemini/3rd house natals have contagiously attractive laughs/smiles, delicate hand and arm movements, and beautiful hands and lips

❃ Every time I have prominent 8th synastry esp moon/mars we always have 🩸 sex eventually 🧍🏽‍♀️ they be feigning so bad for you that they can’t wait a few more days they need it now! But they always end up saying you put a spell on them like no bro u willingly put a spell on YOURSELF💀

❃ 7th house mercury could attract or prefer younger/pettie people or they are seen as such, also prone to have partners w prominent anxiety

❃ Eros/mars in Aries/cancer/scorpio in composite charts shows lots of crying during sex but for different reasons

Aries cries because ur f*cking/sucking them so good all they can do is take it like a champ and cry happy tears 🥲

Cancer cries because you truly touched their soul🥺 they never thought sex could be this satisfying and comforting at the same time (healing sex like Pisces)

With scorpio it’s kinda a mixture of both w sprinkles of trauma bonding✨

❃ Venus in 8th synastry- adoring eachothers beauty marks esp the house person @ Venus , the house person usually adores the Venus’s insecurities/stuff about themselves that they never picked up on which gives the Venus person a new prospective of their beauty

❃ Mercury synastry can tell you how you were first introduced/heard of each other

☿ in 8th- meeting while/before going through a transformational/traumatic period in your life, you could have problems w people owing you money or vise versa, catalyst for spiritual & sexual growth, meeting before/after having a major surgery

☿ in 9th- meeting through college/highschool,being introduced to/by a different ethnicity friend,meeting while traveling esp abroad, catalyst in spiritual journey, meeting through religious community

☿ in 4th- I have this w my mom while her ☿ is in my 1st so you could also share this w your parents, w cancer and Aries basically representing the womb her PUMPUM told her about me😂obvi she had no other choice but to learn about me I was coming weather she liked it or not😎 so w 1st house synastry I feel like they were kinda forced onto you they’re pretty hard to miss🥴with 4th her aunts/women in her family told her she was gonna have another baby before she even knew🤷🏽‍♀️

❃ Jupiter in 1st synastry -even the most stubborn person would hear planet person out w this placement 😏 Jupiter boost house persons ego/outlook on life, planet person just makes everything look good & exciting in house person eyes

❃ Pluto in 11th natal- unfriending someone could really feel like a divorce lmao telling people your not friends anymore and they react so crazy like “NO I NEVER WOULDVE THOUGHT💔💔💔” then splittng up your assets (friends/aspirations)

❃ Gemini Venus-girl next door vibe people watch through your window esp w some Pluto energy on your Venus, the song ‘She by Tyler the creator’ was made about us fr😭

❃ Taurus (2°14°26°)moons people think that they own you or that you’re some object they can use anytime they want whether it be your body or your possessions

Also having a Taurus moon could play out as feeling like you didn’t get the support that you needed in ur childhood, the type to have moms that say “I put clothes on your back, food on your plate, and a pillow to lay your head and you’re telling me I didn’t do enough for you??😠😤” like sorry I needed emotional support and understanding as a child that you couldn’t give me🥲 the mom could see the child as spoiled/ungrateful esp with harsh aspects on the moon, but they could also just feel like they have a right to your possessions esp if you live in the same house what is privacy?😀

❃ 6th house synastry is big on planning together,the type to count down the days till they get to see e/o 🥰

Now offering aura & synastry readings

That’s it for now, have a blessed day ✨

[akiraiscute]

Yandere!Steven Universe X Reader

Tw ; Yandere shit, idk what else help

Steven Universe Future! || NO SMUT U FLITHY ANIMALS.

A/N ; bro no one is writing for steven universe and i badly need smth😭

Steven was talking to garnet, on the couch while garnet was petting cat steven. It was 2AM, both of them were waiting for you, Steven sighed as he heard the door opening. Garnet was looking at you already, Steven turned around as he saw you… he looked shocked, You were in baggy jeans, a long sleeves and crop-top but you stole his jacket before you went out, which both of them were sleeping or gone.. You were slowly taking off your sneakers, getting the silent house uncomfortable really so you tried to distract yourself and kept into your head really until Steven spoke up.

“Soo.. Where were you?”

You looked at Steven confused before smiling.

“You know how sadie is Back into town for her tour with the sadie spects? They asked me to go shopping with them and of course i said yes!”

Garnet looked away from steven to look at you, smiling as she already knew that. She just wanted to make sure you were alright, Cat Steven jumped down from Garnet’s lap and ran to you. Quickly starting to purr and rub against your leg, you bent down and pet her gently as to pick her up as well.. Steven was still looking at you, slightly jealous that you spent all your night talking to them instead of him. Why didn’t they invite him though? That’s- weird, he was the one who introduced everyone to you when you first moved in which was probably when.. he still didn’t know his own powers, those times made him shiver sometimes.

“Were you safe?”

“Why wouldn’t I? We have nothing to fear anymore so I just have been relaxing. Why aren’t you in bed Steven? You planned to propose to connie to tomorrow or is it today since… it’s 2AM??”

“Well, i wanted to wait for-.. my best.. friend.”

“As you are already here (N/N) {Nickname}, I should get going as I have some stuff to do.”

You smiled and waved bye to garnet as you saw her disappear into her room. You turned to steven and walked over to him, gently putting cat Steven in his lap and watched cat steven purr softly and get comfortable on steven’s lap. You giggled as the thought of cat steven and human steven being alike, you walked back and walked to the hallway of the bathroom saying..

“Alright! You should prepare for bed Steven! Ima take a shower!”

Well sorta yelled that out, Steven watched you leave him with this cat steven… He sighed softly, fully forgetting that he told the gems and you that he liked connie, when he was mildly obsessed with you… well he wasn’t always, half way through his past he got obsessed. Can you guess how? Well, really. he got obsessed with you because you almost died by the hands of the diamonds. You're human.. not like him, not like the gems where you can poof but come back better and new, not like him where he can magically heal himself if he got hurt. but at that point, he didn't even realize it was obsessive, he just thought it was friendly love untillll….

He got rejected by Connie which was a few weeks ago, It was bad enough he had to deal with humiliation but she literally pointed out that she thought he liked you. That made him shocked, as you and him well before had nothing in common, he and you only saw each other as friends until Connie pointed out how he looked at you after everything with the diamonds, she pointed out how he looked at you with so much admiration, so much love in his eyes. Connie found it adoring, cute, sweet. She wasn’t even mad.. Which got Steven absolutely confused. If He saw connie being like- oh. He slowly started to realize that he does and did do that.. how dumb is he that he didn’t notice himself? It got awkward quick..

It was already morning as he got the sleep he needed and so did you. Steven was happily okay with you sleeping on the bed as you two got older, he didn’t find it weird that you guys had to share a bed when you two grew up, which until you told him if it was okay if you slept on the couch and not with him and not near him? That absolutely made him feel like shit, he didn’t know that at time either really. You slowly got up and looked at Steven, confused.

“Steven.. why do you have brea—”

Before you could finish your sentence the gems were already coming up, you sighed softly as you ate the breakfast sandwich Steven made as he talked with the gems. You were too tired to say anything so when you got up, you realized they were already downstairs. You softly shook your head as you started to get dress already, you went down to see them talking.. it was nice seeing it. You liked seeing them all talk, happily.. it felt refreshing, You walked to the bathroom and opened the door to start your routine. You walked out to see Steven get piled in snow, you giggled as you started to get something to drink.

“You know what we haven’t played in awhile..?”

Amethyst said as she looked at steven, before slowly getting up and then. Turning into young steven, which made you look shock as you started to laugh, hard.

“STEVEN TAG!”

Steven looked tired before looking at you, his eyes looked a bit shocked before they softened of all of his tiredness, suddenly gone just by hearing your pretty laugh. Before he knew it, he kept dodging Amethyst from tagging him. He kept complaining until he ran into the bathroom, quickly rolling a towel up and putting it in the gap of the door, he sat on it until he heard your far away laughter fading away and amethyst footsteps walking away. He slowly started to put the towel back and open the door, he walked out as garnet was looking around.

“Steven.”

“Yea Garnet?”

“Have you seen Cat Steven, I have been looking all over for her. Can you look for her in the cabinets?”

Steven nodded as he walked to the cabinets, about to ask this one before he dodged amethyst’s trying to tag him. He gasped a bit as he dodged it, looking at her going into garnet and tagging garnet instead but also making you fall down since garnet almost knocked you down. You laughed it off as it didnt even hurt, being trained witn Connie and pearl, you could deal with a lot of things whicn always made steven admire you from afar. Speaking of Steven, he looked shocked before running to you.

“Are you okay?!”

He said as he kneel down and checked you. You chuckled softly as your laughter died down, you nodded before steven dodged both of them and ran to the warpad. Running into pearl..

EEK!! Finished it myself, 6 more drafts to complete. Im dying slowly omg- i should write each other that im planning until Christmas broskis😊 TOMORROW IS TWO STORIES OKAY?? DW DW I’LL DO TWO BECAUSE I HAVE TOO SO IT’LL WORK. I promise it’ll work😭😭 anyways!! Enjoy this my pretties, i have been having mentall problems so im sorry for being gone for awhile of couple times.<3

— Akira!!<3… Akira!!<3 is.. iss… Logg- Logging off. Goodbye!

[elysianholly]

This fucking guy

My villain origin story is people claiming that Riley's biggest crime in the series was being boring. He wasn't just boring. He was a passive-aggressive chauvinist who the show bent over backward to defend. A while back on Reddit, I made a list of reasons why Riley sucks. This is that list, and I'm adding to it.

The only reason he punches Parker is because Parker is mouthing off about a girl Riley likes. Everything about this interaction suggests that Riley has heard him say similar before, and hasn't cared until the woman in question was someone he had a vested interest in.

He calls Buffy stupid for not wanting to date him (if this guy slid into your DMs and called you stupid for turning him down, lbr, this would not lead into a healthy, lasting romance)

He immediately puts himself in competition with Buffy. Even at his most inoffensive, he says things like "I don't even know if I could take you."

He has an inherently chauvinistic view of the world (established in The Initiative)

He is upset that Buffy had a significant relationship before she knew him and assumes Buffy boinked Angel in The Yoko Factor

He uses abuser language to excuse his shitty behavior like, "I love you so much I can't think straight."

He decides that Buffy doesn't love him all by himself

When he decides that Buffy doesn't love him, he confides in Xander and doesn't communicate his relationship issues with Buffy

He wants to help Buffy but only in jobs that are "manly." In No Place Like Home, for instance, he nopes out when Buffy suggests he help with the spell to identify what might be wrong with Joyce. Even if there wasn't a lot for him to do, he could, idk, stick around to be moral support for his partner who is trying to figure out what might be attacking her mother. That seems like a pretty standard partner thing to do.

He gets upset that Buffy "doesn't get all worked up over him" the way she did with Angel when "getting all worked up" in CONTEXT means "isn't constantly miserable."

He is sad boi at Buffy in OoMM for also prioritizing her mother's health after she believes Riley is healed rather than sticking around to play nursemaid

He wants Buffy to show emotion over Joyce at a time when Buffy literally cannot (if you've never had a parent in the hospital with a life-threatening illness, maybe you don't know that there are times/places to break down and "in the hospital" where you're supposed to be strong isn't one of them)

He doesn't care that his girlfriend's mother is sick, possibly with something life-threatening; he cares that he got to be the hero of the piece, the shoulder for Buffy to cry on. His only reaction to any of that was to be hurt that Buffy didn't respond the way he thought she should; no concern for her well-being or Joyce's, just Riley getting his feelings hurt because he wasn't the center of Buffy's universe or the rock for her to lean on when all went to pieces

This is further confirmed by the way he just doesn't mention Joyce's absence at all in As You Were. When he leaves Sunnydale, it's after Joyce has had a successful operation. He returns and she's not there and no questions? No condolences? It's because he doesn't care.

He doesn't ask about Buffy's death when she lets him know she died.

He starts separating himself from the Scoobies and then gets mad for not being included

He literally cheats on Buffy with vampire sex workers (there are people who say they were not sex workers, but in a show where monsters are metaphors, you have to be especially dense or willfully obtuse to not realize this is what they are)

Riley intentionally puts himself in a position where he might be killed or turned specifically to SPITE BUFFY, which demonstrates his lack of consideration for what she might have to do later if things go bad

Riley blames Buffy for being roofied by Dracula (again, monsters as metaphor)

He never apologizes or owns that he was unfaithful

He blames his infidelity on Buffy, actually

The first time Buffy learns Riley isn't happy, she's told she should've seen it, which is classic victim blaming and happens from Xander AND Riley (and a good amount of fans who want to excuse that behavior)

He is fine with torturing sentient creatures, and in fact had a stake made specifically so he could torture vampires without killing them

He goes behind Buffy's back all the time

Riley was not boring. If he were boring, he would be inoffensive. Dull to watch but not rage-inducing. But he is rage-inducing because, despite all the passive-aggressive gaslighting bullshit he gets away with, people in this fandom still believe he was "Buffy's best boyfriend." That she was to blame for the deterioration of this relationship. That he was the healthiest of the Buffyverse men. The show does, too. That's why Xander (Wh*don's mouthpiece) gives that sanctimonious little speech to Buffy (the audience in this case) in Into the Woods to scold us for not treating Riley better. Then they double down in As You Were to make Buffy fawn all over herself to let this gaslighting asshole off the hook for everything he put her through.

Riley's sin is not being boring. It's that he was actually awful. Wh*don himself once called Riley a "healthy relationship" for Buffy, and if that doesn't tell you something, there's no talking to you.

[crushedsweets]

i am so so sorry for the sheer amount of headcanons i'm making you crank out, HOWEVER... i am so curious as to if you have any headcanons for nina and natalie as a duo. i love the way you perceive them and write them it genuinely makes me so happy

i had to doodle them . ok. lets go..

nat was one of the first people nina met from jeff, since she and jeff lived in the barn together.

nina thought nat was a lesbian when they first met . that is literally the only reason why she wasnt mad jeff was living with a woman.

although nina was like, one of the ONLY people to notice toby/nat tension and was sooo heartbroken when she realized they were never getting together..... but then was relieved they didnt get together when she got over jeff because 'well i can't be the only single one!'

again, natalie grew up with 0 girl friends, only hung out with her brother and boys. even after meeting the creeps, theyre still mostly guys. so she's just kinda really awkward and weird around girls. not in a like, 'oh girls r so annoying' way but like... she just doesnt know how to fit in. she just feels so different in the worst possible way and always has.

and nina is very girly, outgoing, touchy, friendly, cute, etc. so it was very like UMMM?!? idk. natalie kept snapping at her, assuming she was fake and weird and just trying to get something from nat, but nina was so persistent and just. friendly. it started making natalie feel warm.

nina's presence started to heal natalies inner little girl. she had it stolen from her time and time again, from her dad, her brother, her peers - the operator, too.

so the two are eventually actual friends. they'll text and play mobile phone games together. sometimes they'll just sit on call and nina will be talking her head off while nat does her own thing at home. one time nat was at tobys cabin and nina was talking about toby on speaker and toby walked in and was like 'hey nina' .... nina almost threw up she was so embarrassed.

nina loves visiting nats bar because everyone is always talking to nina and giving her attention and buying her drinks, and at first nat was irritated but it kinda got nat some better tips since the customers started realizing ninas her friend. so nat was pleased. LOL

nat was never the type to go shopping, but she'll follow nina around and sit while nina tries on clothes and carry around all her bags that she buys LOL... ninas made jokes about nat being boyfriend material and nat just flatout says smth about how nina should get over jeff cuz he would never.

nat is friends with jeff but she's oddly comfortable just telling nina that he's a piece of shit. and ninas always like NOOO U DONT GET IT U DONT SEE WHAT I DO and nats always just .. not... impressed..

nina's always inviting nat out to try new foods. nat grew up just eating bread and noodles with butter half the time so it's fun. nina always tries to pay bc 'well i invited you!!!'. sometimes toby tags along but he feels a way abt going in public places..

nina rarely visits jack cuz she has no reason to, but nat is friends with him so sometimes nina pops in and she's always like ^_^ HELLO TALL MYSTERIOUS SLIGHTLY MONSTEROUS MAN... <3... nat smacks the back of her head cuz she's being dumb and drooling over a bunch of rando freaks. ... . ok i love nina and she owes jeff nothing but she is def not loyal LOLLLL AND SHE HAS THE RIGHT TO FAWN OVER EVERYONE she's a fangirl at heart.

they watch a ton of shows together. nina got nat into horror kdrama stuff, but they have to watch in dub cuz nat cant read the subtitles fast enough . . . at first nina cringed but now she doesnt care.

nat's painted/drawn nina several times, and nina almost cries everytime. she's put the drawings up on her wall before but anytime nat's at her apartment, she takes it down bc 'i dont want my art on ur wall stop it' LOL... kinda rude but whatevs.

ugh theyre just so fucking cute guys im sorry i love them . holds them. brushes their hair.

[daz4i]

first of all shoutout to this theory that got me going into this side quest with this idea in mind 🫡

ok now. lemme offer my take on ratio being titankin or otherwise related to nikador in some way

major spoilers for 3.0 ofc

so obvious detail out of the way first

1. why does it look like him. holding a big book n all

2. "rationality"

3. this might be a translation thing but like. the "reason behind their creation" part is so weird. like yeah ig they have "philosopher" in their name but we know they were created by nikador so why would we assume they ever wanted to study universal knowledge. like why bring this up at all. unless-

4. "further spreading madness masquerading as philosophy" when our guy is all about spreading knowledge and. well. philosophy

on the other end of the spectrum we have gnaeus, who says this

like this immediately made me go "Hm. sounds like a certain someone i know" (while ratio isn't about "crushing" but rather "healing", the sentiment is overall the same)

we later find out that gnaeus is actually a fragment of nikador. so. there is a part of nikador that hates foolishness

^actually a sub theory for that, unrelated to ratio (for now): the reason nikador created philosophers at all was for this reason. for all we know the part of them that's gnaeus is the one who made this choice specifically. idk how titans' inner worlds work tho

so we already got two threads connecting ratio to nikador [insert "which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice" meme here]

there's also. him showing up in castrum kremnos. what the fuck was that. like i have my own theories for why that is but it's still such an odd location. unless it was a clue 🧐

now, to give my own take on these connections

in "i once was in arcadia" we meet a furiae archer who falls in love with a human and even goes to live with him in okhema. her whole mindset about strife changes, she doesn't want to fight anymore, she wants... to live, basically. she even ends up turning on her own kin in the end to protect the citizens of okhema

this tells us that the titankin can essentially turn human, and appreciate humanity enough to want to live among them. she even gives us a brief explanation for how their kind talks and thinks

cerces, the titan of reason

this does confirm that they all CAN think and speak. we actually speak to a few of them over the main story, and while they don't quite behave like humans, they do have the basics down at least. and not all of them want to fight, either, like. they don't attack us after that or smth

so. what's to say that a titankin that happens to get into a major overflow of cerces' power, and then also live among humans (or at least watching them) wouldn't eventually completely reverse their bloodthirst?

this is a lot of reaching, so let me attach another thread, which is how many details in cerces line up with ratio

from the voice of constellation:

"They wield authority over ecologies, knowledge, and rationality" "They allow people to study and rest there, and convey their knowledge to the ignorant tirelessly and generously." | pretty straightforward stuff really. sharing knowledge, encouraging people to study, eradicating ignorance. just as ratio does/wishes to do

now another bit that's a bit more reaching (or just a separate theory stuck inside this one. you pick) but if it is indeed connected i will feel like the smartest person on earth, "Cerces graces the world in the form of a grand and holy tree. Where they take root, vegetation spouts to become a massive forest." there is a theory in the starrail universe that's connected to hi3 - and hi3 is clearly relevant in this arc - about the imaginary tree, and how it is the origin of all life. cerces is literally a giant tree that creates life. when it comes to humans and humanoids, as we can see with the titankin, they create "reason", which i believe to be more accurately described as cognition, since there are actual real life theories that define life as the ability to cognize (this is also like the only reason i can think of why they'd connect these two elements together 😭 since as far as i can tell, there isn't any greek god they're directly inspired by, other than maybe athena for reason and pan for nature?)

all this^ extremely long paragraph to say "you know who uses imaginary powers? 👀" (yeah that one's flimsy lmao. BUT! his powers are connected to knowledge too. also this is more like a small detail in this theory ok)

all this boils down to the thought of, what if a certain titankin somehow got cerces' blessing? they managed to develop thought and knowledge all on their own, and so cerces recognized that, gave them powers, protected them, maybe even helped them gain a more human-like form so they could come and go into the garden of wisdom as they please with no disturbance.

which connects to the second thing we need to question - how did he leave amphoreus?

there are a few options there.

1. he left before aquila decided to not let anyone leave

2. aquila doesn't consider him a person/alive (since he is technically made of stone) so they let him through? yeah idk if that's how it works lol but anyway

3. he left in a similar way to what we see herta use at the end of 2.7, aka not leaving through the sky but through a doorway of some sort

4. cerces protected him, somehow

(5?. i've seen smth abt how beings as strong or stronger than emanators can leave amphoreus which is an option too, but. that's a whole other theory that i don't think applies here. might look into it in a future post tho)

so basically how i think it went down:

ratio was created by nikador as a titankin, specifically a furiae philosopher

he gained enough consciousness through the overflow of cerces' power to just. be alive, beyond spreading strife

he started seeking knowledge, as was perhaps his original nature - either through the part of nikador that was gnaeus, or if nikador was just Like That before the black tide

and here we can go down two ways

either cerces recognized this effort and gave him their blessing, or he just. did it all on his own. even straight up built himself a more human looking body maybe.

i'm actually leaning towards that second option because of a certain detail i did not bring up yet - statues. the titankin are literally statues. they go from statues to moving and then back to statues (albeit crumbling ones) once they're killed. you know who else has a Thing with statues......

so going back to the order of things, if i had to guess, i'd say he created statues of a human - either an already existing one, or one he imagined - and somehow, through science or titan bullshit, he imbued himself into this statue so that it functioned like the titankin do in a sense, while still seeming human in any other way

and then he made even more copies of this statue. which connects to a different "what the fuck is up with dr ratio" theory i posted before! i highly recommend checking it out as it does offer some more ideas and information about this whole concept 🫡

after feeling solid enough in his ability to live through these statues, he decided that he's learned everything amphoreus has to offer, and he wants to see the world beyond the sky. he wants to share knowledge he's learned in amphoreus with others, too (perhaps that "solving a planet's energy crisis on his own" bit from this hoyolab article is related to how the express is stopping by here for an energy supply. hm).

if i go back to the "how he left" section from earlier, i'm leaning towards "he left before the black tide and aquila closing their eyes etc etc etc" which is why he hasn't come back to help, as in, he didn't know it happened

or alternatively, he did somehow learn about it happening - maybe even tried to come visit home and found out that he can't even reach it anymore. maybe hoyo is playing 5d chess and are gonna reveal that he placed the divergent universe project in penacony of all places was so he can study memoria in the meantime and thus find a way back home. tho i doubt that :P

as for why i like this theory and hope to see it or a variation of it go down (but i'm not picky, any ratio backstory will do 😩): stories about a non-human character loving humanity so much that they become like them are just so. *crying screaming throwing up punching a wall sobbing on the floor* yeah.

this is a small detail i can't find anywhere else to put but i love thinking abt it. the owl on his shoulder. and all the owl scrolls spread around amphoreus. maybe he created it himself, something to remember home by. or, maybe he took one of those scrolls and reshaped it for himself, keeping a piece of his world at all times.

and there's an extra tragedy there, too - nous. if ratio's original purpose was accumulating more knowledge, but as he gained more consciousness he decided to share it instead, then nous rejecting him is essentially rejecting the existence he chose for himself (one might argue that that's already the case, but like, this adds another layer of sadness okay? 🥺)

i guess the main question is. does it affect the current story somehow? nah not really, at least not as it currently stands. which is why i don't think this will actually go down - at least not in the main story. maybe in a trailblaze continuance or companion mission - but it's still fun to speculate!

thank you for reading and apologies for any grammar issues or typos 🫡 if you have more to add - either more evidence that i missed that might support this theory, or other ways it may have gone down - i encourage you to do so!

[thekingofthenameless]

I HAVE 1,000 FOLLOWERS!!! Thank you guys so much 🥺

First banner is made by @honeyxmonkey :D

Second one is made by ✨yours truly✨

To celebrate, I’m going to do a Q&A about TKN! (TKN is an abbreviation for my original work, The King of the Nameless.) It isn’t fanfiction, lol. Please don’t call it a fic.

I’ve been writing for four years, give or take? Before TKN, I was writing a fanfiction based on Tales of Arcadia, and it kept straying further away from canon, especially in regards to Merlin and Charlie. I had trouble actually completing a chapter, making drafts again and again until I took an unintentional hiatus after getting a ton of burnout.

I finally came back in January of this year, and while I’d actually had the idea of making the formerly titled Emerald Embers an original story for a while, this time it wouldn’t let go. It took about three days before I said “screw it” and started revamping everything.

And then I had trouble completing anything for this too 😭. I finally just decided to do some of this year’s writing events and not worry about continuity for now: Flufftober and Angstober! I also have a draft for Whumptober eventually lol.

My Ao3!

Sorry if this seems like meaningless blather to some of y’all, but I’m sick of somehow still being known for ToA, and by extent, Emerald Embers. ToA, I don’t mind as much, because I do still like the series and reblog content occasionally. But with Emerald Embers, I do. I was fifteen years old when I started that, and it’s been discontinued for about nine months. I had two ToA related likes yesterday, and one of them was for Emerald Embers, and I don’t know how y’all keep finding it but I do not want to be known for that. I meant to keep it up as an archive, but I’m getting annoyed with the people who somehow find EE content, and then only like that and nothing else… at least most people know TKN isn’t a ToA fanfiction now?

Anyways, the two main characters:

Merlin Caledonensis Ambrosius. Black trans aroace icon. Would probably look good in anything and has endless drip in his regular outfit. A highly empathetic, dignified, mellow, and smart person who struggles with schizophrenia, psychosis (as a result of his schizophrenia), anxiety, C-PTSD, and misophonia, but is still kind because he doesn’t want others to suffer what he’s been through. Secretly the God of Magic walking among mortals. Raised a literal dragon.

Charlemagne William Ambrosius. Giant dragon. Serious, brave, protective (of Merlin), compassionate (towards Merlin), as well as fierce but loving and loyal, who sometimes takes a little bit longer to care about people due to personality differences. Will readily state his opinions and start arguments without caring. Has no qualms about staring people down while gauging their personality and threat level. Was at first completely normal but is now Fucked Up too.

And here’s the (current) blurb describing TKN! Idk if it’ll fit eventually lol

The King of the Nameless is an adaptation of Arthurian Legend, except… it takes place in an entirely fantasy world. Wizards, demons, dragons, mermaids, and spirits are just five of the magical creatures that inhabit Galdorcræft. Alongside magic being everywhere, corruption runs just as deep in the country of Avalon. Seaside towns that imported benign items like silk are now infamous for attracting contract killers and magic hunters. The idea of murdering magical creatures for their body parts, as well being a falsely presumed threat to humanity, is slowly becoming more widespread through rumors of what their magic can do to heal and harm, no matter how much Merlin Ambrosius tries to stop it. He’s a wizard himself, of course. Everybody knows that. What they don’t know is that he’s hiding a lot of secrets: being the God of Magic and Justice, being born a girl, and trying to cope with madness that makes it difficult to tell falsehoods from reality, for one thing. However, he has his dragon familiar and found family, Charlemagne Ambrosius, to keep him grounded and understand him when no one else will. Unbeknownst to them, the very heart of corruption is in Camelot itself. Uther Pendragon has just become king after his father’s death, and he’s been waiting for this. Maybe now that he’s ruling, he can finally kill Merlin and rid himself of the rebellious, soft, mad advisor. With the most powerful wizard in the land dead, then no one will be able to stop him from killing the monsters that plague it.

Art dump of Merlin and Charlie! You can see how much they’ve both changed from their original designs (first images for both) lol.

Rules for the Q&A:

In order to participate, you don’t have to be following me! Just send an ask about TKN with whatever question you have! Anon is turned on :) If y’all want to ask about how their designs changed so much and stuff… 👀

I might do this for.. a month? Idk it depends on how long people have questions lol, but again, I still feel like a lot of people still know me for ToA 😭

Artist credits: Soberana Art (on Artstation), @cat-gh0ul, NaldThal (on Ko-Fi), @heropaws, @gaylightisminetocommand, @biposi, @honeyxmonkey, @azurewildflight, @theeio

Links to their individual posts, if applicable: Current Merlin, Original Charlie, Birthday gift, Forest, Cuddles, Sploot, Meadow, Embrace

Taglist: @gaylightisminetocommand, @the-arson-author-gamer, @honeyxmonkey, @danhengsbestie

Also before I answer any other questions I’ll answer @thecomfywriter’s first, since she sent me a dm asking about TKN ages ago and then I forgot to complete a post 😭 It's still sitting around somewhere and I'm so sorry

If you'd like to be on the TKN taglist, just let me know! You can dm me, reply to this, or shoot me an ask. I'm also on Discord as the same username if you want to chat about TKN, get my rambling before you see me make a post, brainstorm with me, etc :)

And I have a TKN server, actually! I should really just. Revamp it idk I have forgotten to keep it updated with my Tumblr and Ao3 content

[salt-cedar]

I'm rewatching 1899 now for the 3d time and my brain is spitting theories that are all 100% valid now since we'll never know, ok?

🜃 This theory, that the show is heavily influenced by Jungian philosophy, is still what I believe is the core of the story. However I'm now leaning towards thinking that Virginia is Eyk's wife. She is much closer to him in age and the role of a mistress also can leave a wound of being not chosen (yes I'm thinking of Hannah from Dark).

🜃 I think that, for the second season and the second level of simulation, the earth symbol means Earth. Something happened to it, and the Prometheus is maybe one of the ships destined for another planet(s?). That' would explain the persistent motif of betrayal and taking a dead man's name and place -- people would do a lot in order to get on a rescue ship. Notably, the stories of Julien, Olek and Lin Yi could be explored deeper here.

🜃 Based on the visual emphasis on the episodes' titles and their weird simplicity, I decided that it'd be cool if for every season the names of every episode were the same. Like, s2e1 - The Ship, s2e2 - The Boy, etc. The events in an episode would not be the same (that would be a very boring show) but would have references to the previous episodes, building up layers of meaning. Idk if the showrunners actually planned that, I just think it could be a very neat idea for such a cerebral show.

🜃 Following this, I think it's pretty obvious that the second season would be in another layer of simulated reality which is the space ship. The first episode of the second season, titled "The Ship" would be about the space vessel Prometheus, the second, titled "The Boy" -- about the ship's computer, probably modeled after Eliott (see another Eliott crack theory below). The last one, "The Key", would be about another key to get out of the simulation -- which is Ciaran (KEY-ran). The third season would take place in a real reality, with the last episode being the key to complete understanding of the story in all three layers (and it has to do with Eyk).

🜃 The Eliott crack theory that was promised is that he is made in the image of Ciaran. Yes, I am the one who said that Eliott is Maura's inner Child in season one, I stand by that. Maura identifies with men a lot, both in relationships and on a deeper personal level. In the 1899 simulation she has studied for a masculine profession, wears pants, has no particular sentimentality towards children, etc. In the 2099 she is the only woman in the chamber with hair cut short, which also makes her stand out. If her family story is true, she was probably raised without a woman's influence, making her identity lean masculine. So her Animus is a guy and her inner Child is a boy, that's fine. But upon rewatching now I am not 100% sure that Ciaran is alive. The question: "What have you done to my brother?" was poignantly repeated twice. Maybe Ciaran is dead and papa Henry made him into Prometheus' board computer (and that makes him capable of knowing what did he do with the people on the ships!). That could also help with not explaining why Eliott's/Ciaran's actor grew up between the seasons, as he is made in the image of Ciaran at different ages.

🜃 With that said, I don't think that we wouldn't have seen more of Daniel in seasons 2 and 3. Aneurin Barnard is too much of a cutie pie and a talented actor to not hire him for later seasons. Maybe we could get cool scenes with Maura visualizing him at the time of need and maybe even conscientiously going back into 1899 simulation to learn or find something. After all...

🜃 ..."What is lost will be found" is about integration and wholeness. Jungian philosophy and art based on it is often about going into the depths of madness/subconscious to the point of seemingly losing all sense only to come back out of it healed and wiser than before. I maintain that probably all the characters experienced some sort of disintegration of psyche due to trauma and had the misfortune to experience that disintegration in the collective subconscious on the 1899 level. Remember how in Dark the triquetra was not only a cool symbol but also a graphic expression of oneness of past, present and future; the loop itself as it is a knot; and the entanglement of three worlds/timelines? Maybe the Earth symbol also stands for multiple things at once, one of them being a broken whole? The slash cuts off one of the corners of the triangle, after all. And I believe that, at the core, this story is about healing that cut and becoming whole again.

🜃 The third, "real-real" season would probably take place in 1999. Though it might contain flashbacks, too. The abundance of references to 70s and 80s is fine because that would be the time of most characters' childhoods and youth. My pet theory is that the simulations are to stimulate character's brain activity because they are all a part of human supercomputer program. It's a rarely explored old-fashioned sci-fi idea, that people can solve problems and work through data in their sleep which produces intense dreams as a side effect. My strongest argument for this? All the references to "Alice in Wonderland", a book that is notoriously all about math under the guise of nonsense adventures.

🜃 Of course, there is going to be something even more sinister about the whole putting people to sleep to see nightmares scenario but as per tradition, the twist is that all the horror was for love. And we would cry about it, and never feel normal again.

?? The one thing I really can't decipher is what's up with all the Alien references. Like, what are they about.

[powderseas]

side order is here!!! its real!!! yippee

what do you think of it so far?

ok so im just gonna spit out all my side order thoughts so far

SPOILERS FOR SIDE ORDER AHEAD!!!!!!

EDIT: I ACTUALLY FINISHED THE GAME WOOO (just one run tho lol) im gonna write my thoughts under the previous stuff

OK SO. i think im a little..? dissapointed..? abt sider order?? like im kinda conflicted abt the lore, also i suck BALLS at the game

the thing is i have done 5 runs so far AND COULDNT GET A SINGLE WIN. the most i can do is up to floor 20.... im literally so bad at this game I ONCE DIED 2 TIMES IN AN EASY LEVEL. im newgen guys.

maybe im not fit for rougelike games but like... idk. i feel like me and the fandom as a whole expected so much more from side order. i feel like if the game is gonna make you replay the same stuff over and over again it should atleast have a SOUL CRUSHING LITERARY MASTERPIECE TYPE OF LORE like OE and Alterna

AND CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW DIRTY THEY DID FOUR???? literally called them an irrelavent loser and then sweeped them aside... THEY DONT EVEN HAVE A PALETTE ICON???? theyre not even a secret boss smh.... agent 4 had so much potential I WILL NEVER FORGIVE NINTENDO FOR THIS. and like sure the parallel canon level kind of includes four but that thing is literally an npc??? like imagine what they couldve done with the story if they had included four in it:

when four is left out from the squidbeak splatoon they try to prove themselves by siding with marina with her project. it makes perfect sense. marina and four are both scared of being seperated by their loved ones. but four gets consumed by their anger and jealousy and goes full order mode LIKE DO YOU GUYS SEE MY VISION!!!! i will be forever mad that we didnt get this.

also why is murch out of all the chracters have a pallete??? why didnt they put in captain 3 or something????? sheldon i kinda understand since hes also kinda a part of the squidbeak splatoon BUT MURCH??? get the fuck out!!!

negative stuff aside tho. i love pearl and marina so much. THIS IS THE PEARLINA GAME GUYS!!!!! pearl literally mentions that marina and her sleep in the SAME BED???? marina is so autistic. my little autism creature. SHE MAKES DINO ARMS IN THE ENDING SCENE AUGHHHHHGHHH MY HEARTTT i love marina so much AND PEARL. SUCH A SILLY GOOBER. acht is so precious too... BUT I CNAT BELIEVE THAT THEY MADE THEM WHITE*??? ACHT IS NOT WHITE NINTENDO. anyways i love eight and her little found family full of lesbians. they are all lesbians your honor. we are raising lesbians in this house.

so yeah. i hope i can finish the run atleast ONCE. but like. idk i havent finished the game but side order jsut makes me feel. sad... and lonely...?? unlike octo expension where you could see more and more people using the metros and the chatrooms between marina and pearl are just AUUGGHHH OE IS A GAME. ABOUT CONNECTIONS OK. it makes me feel warm and happy and even though eight became traumatized i like to think that she healed and in the process met so many important people in her life.

in side order i dont see anything in eight*??? is she traumatized??? is she vibing??? is she happy to help??? I LITERALLY CANT TELL. side order makes me feel so cold and empty like do you guys understand what i mean. and its probably becasue it doesnt even take place in the real world. and the thing is. i understand that side order is supposed to be everything that OE couldnt be. i understand that. both games have their own quirks BUT. i just cant seem to make myself love it unlike any other story mode in splatoon...... im really trying to be not biased here but yeah. these are my opinions for side order

AFTER GAME THOUGHTS

HELLO. so yes i somehow managed to win the game. and honestly. the final boss was pretty fun and everyone was so cute at the end omg... but i still think that side order is a bit underdevloped.... i dont even know if ill try to %100 is cuz playing it makes me SO STRESSFUL im glad i get to finish a run BUT i will definetly not be touching side order atleast for a while.... but despite i had plenty of stuff i didnt like in side order the ending managed to make me forget all that haha

[angel-eyes05]

i remember his hands - chapter 3

PAIRING: kang the conqueror x fem!reader

SUMMARY: after a scientific experiment goes horribly wrong, you've been transported to the quantum realm and have been stuck there for the past decade. with no company, aside from janet van dyne, your life changes forever when a mysterious man in a golden ship crash lands next to your settlement. startled with his initial presence, you two have a rocky start. but as time goes on, you two find each other slowly drawn to one another. you have secrets though, and he has a past he refuses to bring up. can you two make it through navigating an unknown world together, discovering any ulterior motives, and stand the test of time in a place where time has no meaning at all?

INFO: slow romantic burn, pretty fast sexual burn, kinda enemies to lovers????, takes place during that little flashback janet has during quantumania, idk how accurate this is gonna be to canon stuff cause i get very confused about the quantum realm lol, reader is in mid to late 20s while kang is in his “early 30s” (ik he like technically doesn't age or whatever idk the lore but i just made it accurate to jonathan majors age and wanted to give an accurate age range/gap/count), y/n will be very fleshed out like im gonna give her everything lol

WARNING: explicit language, smut (minors dni), masturbation (f), oral sex (fem receiving), cum play, not a very happy ending (guys aftercare is important)

CHAPTER WORD COUNT: 2.5k

NOTES: i just wanna say thank you for all the love recently! idk if ill set a specific schedule for when ill release the chapters or not cause honestly i just work better whenever i write when i want without a time constraint so thats probably what i’ll end up doing. if you want me to write a specific one shot for kang or even another character (i feel most comfortable writing for mcu, star wars, the last of us, and stranger things, but if i know the piece of media youre talking about and feel comfortable writing about the character, im down) just lmk! also i decided at the last second this was gonna be a smuty chapter so..yeah!

PREVIOUS PART

—-------------------------------------------------------------------------

It had been about two weeks since you found Kang at the crash site. Despite the moment you two had when you first fixed him up, you two had very little interactions since then. It made sense though. Both of you were taking your own separate times to heal, you in your room, bedridden from your horrible headaches, him on the couch, still unable to walk due to his foot and abdomen. According to Janet, he hasn’t been very talkative. He would occasionally respond to her comments about how he was feeling, but wouldn’t say anything about where he came from or why he was here. So she just stopped asking. It took a while for you to open up to Janet about how you got here at first as well though, so you understood why he would be all shut up about it. It got you thinking about how you ended up here. How much you left behind. God you wish you got the chance to leave a note or something. At the very least, for them…

You quickly dragged yourself out of that thought, knowing the path it would lead you down led to nothing but wasted tears. It was late at night, and you laid sleepless in your bed, so it was easy to let your mind wander. To distract yourself, you replayed the moment with him in your mind. You were a little touch starved, in that way at least, so feeling Kang’s hand in that sensitive of an area drove you mad. Thinking about it would always give you the same reaction. Butterflies slowly fluttering into your stomach, roses blooming onto your cheeks, and the near uncontrollable urge to touch yourself. You know your relationship was non existent right now and had a horrible start, but sometimes you wondered what would happen if you walked over to the couch right now and started to kiss him. The only thing you ended up doing though was changing your now soaked underwear.

You always felt bad when you let yourself think like that. Poor guy was probably just looking for something to hold while he was in pain. And you were taking advantage of it. Then again, you remembered how he slowly pulled his fingers away from your thigh once you were finished stitching him up, an act that did seem very purposeful. Again though, he might have done that unconsciously. You always sent yourself into this back and forth inner dialogue with yourself about his intentions in that moment. Whether you liked it or not, during the past two weeks, you’ve only had two things on your mind: your pain, and him.

With the mix of your restless mind, the ache between your legs, and your now grumbling stomach, you decide to get out of bed and go to the kitchen to find something to eat. Also partially because you would get to see him, awake or not. To be honest, you preferred him asleep. You could just admire him from a far, without the complexities of a conversation to mess anything up. You crept into the hallway, adjusting your eyes from the dim light in your room to the rest of the house, enveloped in the darkness. Thankfully, you knew the layout of the house well, so you doubted you would trip over anything. You wandered throughout the cabin until you got past Janet’s room and into the kitchen. You didn’t realize how flawed your plan was, it just now clicking that you wouldn’t be able to see Kang in the darkness. You didn’t entirely mind though. Just knowing he’s in the same room as you put your thoughts slightly at ease. 

You finally make it to the counter and put your arms out to find something. They land on a round, spiked fruit. Too scared of accidentally cutting yourself if you use a knife to peel it, you decide just to bite into it. Juice drips down from your mouth as your teeth sink into the fruit. Although the food here was no where near as good as back home, you managed to find a few gems here. The fruits were definitely one of them. Once you finish with the fruit, you use the sleeve of your loose shirt to wipe your mouth. You paced the room a bit, still kind of restless. Your eyes still haven’t entirely adjusted to the dark, but you think you have a pretty good standing of your ground. That is until you trip over the back of the couch. You brace yourself for the impact of flying over the couch and waking up everyone in the process, until you’re suddenly stopped.

It’s a hand. No, not just a hand. The hand. His hand.

Again, it stays there longer than it should have. Placed just below where your sternum meets your breasts. You could feel your heart beating faster the longer his hand stayed there. “You’re a loud chewer” Kang finally said. It was more of a deep whisper though. God you loved the sound of his voice, despite the few times you heard it. “You must be a light sleeper then” you replied in a similar tone. Despite still not being able to see his face, you could tell he was smirking. He slowly push you back up to your normal position. The trick was that he didn’t move his hand. He actually tightened his grip on your shirt. That’s when it clicked for you. He wanted it just as bad as you did. 

You then placed your hand over Kang’s, rubbing deep circles just below his knuckles with your thumb. Then, he began to pull you by your shirt to the front side of the couch. You followed his hand until he stopped pulling, leaving you in the same place you were when you stitched up his shoulder. You stood there as he began to move his hand down from your sternum. The feeling of him dragging his fingers down your body at an agonizingly slow pace was enough to get your starved pussy wet. Then he got to your hips, where your loose pants rested. He then took his other hand and used both hands to drag your pants off. Once you kicked them off, he went back up to your panties, hooking his pointer finger around the sides of them and dragged those off even slower than the pants. 

He then placed his hands on your bare hips, digging his thumbs into them. A slight moan escaped your lips. In response, he placed his finger over your mouth in a shushing action. “She can’t hear you.’’ You were overcome with embarrassment at the fact you were so enveloped in the thought of having sex with Kang that you forgot that Janet was only a room away. You decided now you had to be silent, however hard that would prove to be later. He put that hand back on your hip and helped you onto his chest. You placed your hands over his shirtless shoulders, being mindful of his left one. You pressed your hands deeply into them and began to massage them. Thank god your eyes had finally adjusted to the dark, because now you could see every emotion playing across his face as you sunk your hands deeper into his shoulder muscles. You moved the massage down his arms, making your way to his biceps. They were massive and tough. All you could think about was how much you wanted them around your neck. Ironic. Once you moved on from those and finally made it to his hands, you took hold of them.

You used them to help you take off your shirt and bra. After tossing your bra to the floor, you placed his hands on your breasts and began to grope them with his hands. His eyes rolled back into his head, and as soon as you could tell he was about to moan, you smashed your lips into his to capture it. You took your hands off of his to cup his jaw to fully envelop yourself in the kiss. He kept one hand on your breast while he moved the other one down and began to run circles around your clit. You softly moaned into his mouth with each rotation he made. As each second went by, the kiss became more intense. More desperate. You had no idea how long it had been since he had touched someone like this, and you knew it had been forever since you were touched like this. You two both had some desperation to your actions. Like this would be the last time either of you would experience something like this ever again. Both of you so starved of touch. You needed this so badly, and part of you knew he needed it too.

As he began to circle your clit with more ferocity, you felt the heat in your chest growing stronger. God he had just started and you were already about to come. You didn’t to yet. If you did, that meant it would be over. Lucky for you, you felt his hand pull away from your clit. He pulled away from the kiss ass well, panting. “I need you to help me up for a second” he said. You reluctantly got up, wondering if he was just going to leave you here like this. It was just now that you realized how naked you were. Sure, he didn’t have a shirt on, but you still felt much more exposed than him for some reason. You helped him up onto his feet, also now realizing exactly how much taller he was than you. Seeing him staring down at you like that. Like you had suddenly become the most important thing in the world to him. Suddenly, he turned you around and shoved you onto the couch. You sat there as he kneeled down and began too kiss your inner thighs.

He moved those strong, dry hands of his to the top of your thighs and sprayed them out against them. He dug his fingers into them as he moved his mouth from your inner thigh to your lips. Feeling his warm breath against them in the cold room sent shivers down your spine. You grabbed the top of his head for leverage as you thrust your hips into his mouth.  “Look at you” he said in between kisses. “Being such a good girl and getting so wet for me. Seems like you completely forgot about the fact we were trying to kill each other two weeks ago.” It was strange to you a little. You had convinced yourself you wouldn’t be safe in the same house as Kang, and now here you were, completely naked on the couch with him eating you out. 

He wasn’t doing enough though. You weren’t nearly as satisfied as you were when he was circling your clit. He had yet to stick his tongue in you, all he was doing was kissing your folds. He was just teasing you again. “P-please” you said desperately. “I-I need y-you d-deeper.” He removed his mouth from your area and moved his hand to your clit again as he talked to you to keep you stimulated. “Oh thats what you want now? Am I not doing enough for you? Because I could stop if that’s what you prefer.” “N-n-no!” you nearly shouted out. “P-please, I-I j-just wanna f-feel you.” He sat there for a moment thinking, fingers still on your clit. “P-please Kang-g.” You asked again, looking deep into his eyes. “Well, since you asked so nicely. And plus, how could I say no to someone as pretty as you. Sitting there so neat and ready for me.” 

Next thing you know, he dives back in, his tongue licking all over your folds and into your pussy. Your strangled moan makes one strange noise, but he must have liked it because he moved his hands up to grab deep into your hips in response. God you could stay here for hours. Layed here sprawled out on the couch with him eating you out. You just wish you could moan and whine for you. You wanted so desperately to scream his name out into the world and let it know how much he had you under his grasp. And you knew he wanted it also. But that was part of the appeal of everything. Knowing you had to stay quite. It made it more enticing. But man you couldn’t wait until you had the cabin to yourself. When he could fuck you through your bed properly, where you could scream his name at the top of your lungs, and him with yours. For now though, you would take this. It was enough for what you needed right now.

As he moved his tongue from your folds to your swollen clit, he begins to suck on it. You felt the heat return back to your core as you itched with pleasure, a roaring tide begging to wash from your pelvis into his mouth. The heat of his breath on you, the tightening grip of his hands on your hips, his tongue fluttering over your folds and clit, the soft hums he would make after tasting you. “F-fuck K-kang. I-I-I’m gonna c-cum” you said, the words barely making it out of your mouth without being mixed with a moan. He nods slightly in approval, gliding his tongue over your folds like silk and moving on of his hands to circle your clit to help pull it out of you. Finally, you feel the wave escape your pussy. You grab a pillow near you and release all your moans and screams into as the ecstasy exits you and enters his mouth. You arch your back as he tries to swallow as much of your cum as he can. You’re blinded by the intensity of your orgasm as your thighs tense up and you can hardly move anything, except to move the noises out of your mouth.

Once you finish, Kang stays there, licking off the last of your essence off your folds and feeling your throbbing clit under his tongue. He backs away from your pussy and moves up to your mouth as he kisses you, sharing with you some of your cum. He uses your shirt to clean up his mouth and the remaining bits of cum from your folds. To your surprise though, after that, he tosses the shirt on the floor, stands up, and walks away to your room. In shock, you convince yourself he went to your room to grab you a new change of clothes. Once you hear the door close though, you snap yourself back into reality. Looking down at yourself, naked and trembling (part from the cold and part from the orgasm), embarrassment floods your body. You couldn’t believe how easy you gave yourself up for him. God you knew you were desperate, but you didn’t know you were that desperate. And there he was in the other room, sleeping in your bed. Leaving you there on the couch, laying out naked, waiting for someone to take you away like some fantasy. But there you were. Alone. And really fucking cold.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

NEXT PART

A/N: yeaaaaaaaah, i needed drama so i did that. sucks but i didnt have any other ideas sorry lol. hope you liked the chapter though! this was actually my first time writing smut so i hope i didnt do that bad. looking forward to chapter 4!!! also sorry i didnt really proofread this one either cause it was super late when i posted it so sorry

[somehhuuuhh]

Me rambling my oc (Austin, Ice, flame) :D

I feel bad because they just show up one day on my blog without explaining who they are or what they do....my bad ( ..)

Pt.2

I gonna put it under a cut cuz it's going to be long and Idk if anybody cares about ocs which make me sad :(

Doodles of them :D

Kay, so like they go around and capture some glitches that infect other aus before it gets corrupt. They are all kinda bad at their job, but like they have nothing else to do, so why not?

They are just a silly billy group trying there best

Important facts about them

Austin is blind and mute

Austin is always smiles kinda like og sans

Ice helps Austin to somewhat see by being around Austin, Austin energy, movement, CHECK, LV, HP, and DEF

Flame and Austin are connected where he knows what Austin wants to say, but Austin can't speak so Flame says it for him which makes him the voice

So basically Flame is Austin voice and Ice is Austin eyes

Ice and Flame is with him 24/7 and they aren't forced to be with him but like they share the same soul and for some reason the soul is with Austin. So like if Austin dies they die soooooo yea they kinda forced to stay with him

Austin, Ice, and Flame share the same hp, soul, and lv

Austin likes to wear dresses :D

Facts about them

🌟 ABOUT 🌟

Name: Austin

Age: ?

Species: skeleton

Pronouns: any pronouns

Sexuality: ✨️bi✨️ and genderqueer

Personality: He is a comfortable and cozy guy. He likes to help people and just a kind guy, but he can get mad. He his an outgoing guy and doesn't really have anxiety. He is just really curious sometimes

Likes: he's boyfriend, pillows, gaming, drawing, spiders

Dislikes: fish, horror movies, wearing jeans

🌟 SKILLS 🌟

He was gaster blasters

Blue attacks

Bones attack

Teleport

He can take on of his body part off if he wants to

He can make force field around him or other people

Weapons: he will have a classic bone, but in the bottom, it's sharp and broken

Weaknesses: really strong people he is strong with his powers, but he isn't really strong when it comes to his non-existence muscle

🌟 OTHER 🌟

Height: 4’6 might change it later

AU or Place of Residence: he lives I'm my nowhere void

Background: I was bored and wanted a comfort character so I looked at my old art and oc. It was either them or another oc so I picked Austin, Ice, and Flame. I was kinda lazy to make their backstory so I didn't make one because I was making another au and it takes a lot of energy to make it good. So now they exist and like to help me manage the multiverse by fixing glitches.

💫RANDOM FACTS ABOUT HIM💫

He his blind and mute

Ice help him to see (kinda)

Flame help him to talk (kinda)

He always smiles

Ice and Flame is with him 24/7

He, Ice, and Flame share the same hp, soul, and lv

He's just a comfort character

Don't say anything mean to him because he will cry in blood

He doesn't know how to flirt that good

🌟 ABOUT 🌟

Name: Ice

Age: ?

Species: ghost angel?

Pronouns:he/they

Sexuality: aromantic

Personality: He is shy and not really outgoing compared to Austin and Flame. They kinda overreact sometimes. He always wants to come up with plans. He just wants to protect his friends and family

Likes: planning stuff, hugs, animals, flying

Dislikes: scary movies, scary people, surprises, when things don't go as planned

🌟 SKILLS 🌟

Hobbies: planning stuff and protecting the multiverse with Austin and Flame

He can heal other people

His tears can cause damage to other people and to soil objects

His halo can act like a portal (he can just throw his halo and it can be turned into a portal)

Can summon sharp spare, ice crystal

They can summon Ice barrier

He can make snow or ice, people or objects and control It (Let's say he made a Ice giant and control it with his hands)

He can make a mist (he will create a mist so they can escape or something)

Weapons: he doesn't have one he just uses his powers

Strengths: when he feels calm, when he get pats, planning

Weaknesses: when he freaks out, when his plan doesn't work, when he gets panic attacks

🌟 OTHER 🌟

Height: 30cm

AU or Place of Residence:in my nowhere void

💫RANDOM FACTS ABOUT HIM💫

He helps Austin to somewhat see by being around Austin, Austin energy, movement, CHECK, LV, HP, and DEF

He isn't forced to be around Austin or Flame and it that he feels safe around them and love them as friends so much

He like to hide around Austin hoodie when get scared

Can't go through solid objects

Can't fly without his wings

They stutters

He has anxiety

🌟 ABOUT 🌟

Name: Flame

Age: ?

Species: ghost demon?

Pronouns: he/they

Sexuality: straight

Personality: He is outgoing and chaotic. He is a bit weird to Ice and Austin but does care about and think about as family. He is very impatient, so he gets annoyed when Ice is trying to say something when he stutters

Likes: spicy food, watermelon, bugs, going to Outertale

Dislikes: everything he doesn't like 👍

🌟 SKILLS 🌟

Hobbies: He protects the multiverse with Austin and Ice

He can make his horns and tail even sharper

Can summon fire

Can destroy things by touching but they kinda have to use a lot of energy where there is barely left and it takes awhile for all the energy comes back (when he use it takes his energy, he kinda acts like he is drunk)

He's tail can pick up a lot of heavy things and can stretch

Can go through solid objects

He's flames can show memories or what once there

He can make a fire wall (its wall, but it is made out of fire)

Weapons: none he just use his powers

Weaknesses: cute stuff, dresses, losing

🌟 OTHER 🌟

Height:31cm

AU or Place of Residence: in my nowhere void

💫RANDOM FACTS ABOUT HIM💫

He and Austin are connected where he knows what Austin wants to say, but Austin can't speak, so Flame says it for him, which makes him the voice

He can speak in any language

He can tell if someone is okay or not

He's pretty fast when he fly

He's a bit jealous that there isn't another him in the multiverse

Oh and Austin has BF :3

Like of course he does he have rizzzzzzzzzzzzzz

So his boyfriend is Iso ✨️ by @cxffee-undxrtale and if you want to more about him just ask his creator.

But yeah they pretty cute together tbh. So here's some facts about them being the most adorable couple ever

Iso is rude to people, but they are soft with Austin

This isn't really a toxic relationship. This is more a wholesome one, and of course, there are still some problems

Austin will be the one to ask Iso to a date after getting some courage to ask him out

Iso gets easily flustered when Austin flirts with him even though it is super cheesy

Their ship name is Aso

Austin doesn't get a lot of things when it comes to love, we doesn't even know what it dlif means (he is too innocent), and Iso doesn't know to romantic as well.

Austin will give Iso a bunch of gifts and usually gets help by Flame and Ice

It's hard for Austin to date someone because he is blind and mute, and Ice and Flame is with him 24/7 so he is happy that he is dating Iso

They met when Iso was in an au while Austin was there for one of their missions and Iso was probably there because he was beating up people in that au

Iso doesn't mind Flame and Ice being around them while they are together

The restaurant that they go to for a date will be Olive Garden :D

Flame hates being the 3rd wheel, but Ice doesn't mind being the 4th wheel if Austin is happy

Some little comics of them

For this comic Austin doesn't like when Flame says bad words so yea. It was fine little comic to draw cuz I was board

Ummm...

:( ... --- -- . - .... .. -. --. ... / .-- .-. --- -. --.

[rvspecter]

ramble about each of ur suits ships for as long as u can (might result in a novel)

omg sweet anon asking about all my ships <3

ok so first i don't ship something because i want to see two ppl get married i don't do that. i'll ship it because i find it interesting/sexy etc

LET'S START WITH THE SEXIEST

jessica/harvey

-everyone sleeping on this ship makes me so mad. like they are so sexy!?!?!?!?!?? even when they banter they are sexy. THEY ARE TOTALLY FLIRTING?!??!?! anyways i particularly like when they fight for dominance which is basically every scene with them. oh and i like how she's taller than him in heels and how she stares him down like he's breakfast. SO WHY ISN'T THERE MORE FIC!??!? what i need is for someone to help me establish their backstory. like i know they fucked in a bathroom stall on the 53rd floor but i'm not sure when. was it when harvey was working in the mailroom? i feel like they are the hardest ship to write for actually and make believable. BUT I KNOW THEY FUCKED!!!!!

mike/harvey

-mike legit has harvey wrapped around his finger. if that boy said “hire me as a lawyer even tho ive only finished high school and then offer to go to prison for me when im found out” harvey would be like “how high”. i don't think anyone can argue that harvey loves mike

but to me marvey is an unrequited love story. idk what to say. mike doesn't love harvey. sometimes i don't even think mike likes harvey as a friend. that's how soured by s6+ i was. mike treated harvey like shit and harvey kept coming back for more. it was actually painful to watch. i read marvey and usually the stories i find believable r the ones where mike leaves with rachel and GROWS UP (even tho he's a 30 yr old man at the start of the show) and everyone's wounds have had time to heal. i can buy marvey getting together then. what i don't find believable are stories where mike is pining for harvey!?!??! i don't know what show that is. the guy literally couldn't get away from harvey fast enough. he gets out of jail and almost immediately fucks off to seattle with his wife and doesn't even tell harvey about it like??

when i first got into the fandom side of suits i really liked the romanticized version of marvey where they wud do ANYTHING for each other. but when i watch the show - this only goes in one direction

donna/harvey

-this is this ship i was rooting for when i watched the show the first time. the thing about them is their history and emotional connection. to me they are a single entity. they r partners and they have always been partners. u don't even get to talk to harvey without going thru donna - she is literally the physical border between him and the outside world

i love how they protect each other. harvey has never let anything bad happen to donna. it's a fact. he'd do anything to protect her and we see that. but here's the thing about their relationship - it's mutual. donna does INSANE THINGS for harvey like KEEP A DOCUMENT THAT SHE STOLE FOR OVER A DECADE ON THE OFF CHANCE THAT SOMEONE GOES AFTER HARVEY FOR CAMERON'S CRIMES. they wud do anything for each other and they both know it

i also love how highly they think of each other. we always see donna defending harvey. she defends him because she thinks he's a good person ("because ur worthy"). she's one of few ppl on the show who does. most ppl think of him as a dick and that group includes mike

the way harvey views donna is almost worshipful. he thinks she can do no wrong. “donna doesn’t make mistakes.” he trusts her completely. she's his compass. every success he has is a shared success. “we made partner.” he doesn’t even think he can be himself without her. and don’t get me started on how debilitating her moving 3 doors down the hall was for him

anyways tldr their relationship is a two way street. they love each other and they both know it. and i'm not talking about after they finally get together (let's not talk about s9). i'm talking about before. because even if they didn't know the other person wanted to be with them - they knew they loved them and would do anything for them

MIGHT AS WELL GO THROUGH ALL MY SHIPS

scottie/harvey

-s1 version of them was so fun! i wanted this to have been a long term friends with benefits type thing. when they became a couple i didn't like it because it was always her sacrificing stuff for him and not the other way around

sean cahill/harvey

THIS SHIP NEEDS MORE FIC. i was just thinking about them. sean tells harvey 'I MOVED HEAVEN AND EARTH FOR YOU ONCE BEFORE AND NOW THE WELL IS DRY' like sean was totally IN LOVE WITH HARVEY. it's crazy how much he did for him actually. like what did sean get out of it??!?!?!?!??! anyways they totally fucked while mike was in prison

travis tanner/harvey

they way i see them is travis is obsessed with harvey's hair and hands and generally thinks he's just a pretty girl he wants to get with. harvey is like eww no but also we know harvey likes fucking the competition. so i think they fuck on and off, after or before cases and it's very kinky because travis is a total freak in the sheets

LAST BUT NOT LEAST

cameron dennis/harvey

plz see this fic for details

[poppinlovemp4]

what are your thoughts on each nct member

im crying there are 22 of you here thats fewer people than nct. who's sending me this. anyway im bored so ill answer... really long obviously there are so many guys

i dont have any thoughts on the wish members ive never streamed idk any of their names and i'll keep it that way bless their hearts. or not idk

jisung: idgaffff his dancing is overhyped and he's charmless to me and i hate deepvoice rappers forever

chenle: probably nicest voice in dream but that's a really low bar. dont really have other thoughts. i've heard he cares a lot about basketball which can either be charming or offputting i dont know enough about him to say

yangyang: thats OOMF top 3 in ncity to me <3 i really did not care about him all when i was first entering weishenville sorry for my anti-kpop rapper bias but he's soooo fun to watch onstage. imo the only one other than ten obviously who's got a good handle on #It. and he has the cutest smile ever probably. and i like him :-)

jaemin: idgaf i literally cannot think of a single thing to say here

haechan: seems like an unsavoury bloke from what i've seen of his scandals and i hate his voice so so so badly like when i first listened to 127 on purpose i had to pause and look up a lyric video to see whose voice i hated so much. good performer though

jeno: least fave nct member and i dont like many of them. disband

renjun: hope he's feeling better these days. no further thoughts

hendery: thats OOMF but kind of less than the rest of wayv sorry.. he's like one of the only idols ever i think is genuinely funny the way he speaks and acts is so 😭 i really dont know how he comes up with any of it. was sincerely baffled when i found out he wasnt wasian

xiaojun: he's all right

mark: ive literally never been impressed by any performance ive seen from him idk WHERE people get the all rounder genius idol thing from it's not showing #ToMe!!! the originator of many fave reaction images though so he's okay in my book

jungwoo: idgaf. wait no back when djj was announced people kept comparing him to xiumin in cbx to justify his place there (as in 2 main vocals / guy who isn't a main vocal) and he is not xiumin he could never dream of having my beautiful sister's charisma uniqueness nerve or talent! other than that idgaf

winwin: saw the news today hope he heals all righttt and it's nothing too serious... as an idol he brings nothing to the table except cuteness and that's not very important to me so i hope his career in cn thrives bless

jaehyun: tbh when nct first debuted i hated him so badly for literally no reason like his face just made me so mad. and look at us now <3 he is my entire 127 tag. i liked his debut so i'll continue following his solo career and he's also funny to me but i can't say that without feeling like jaehyun tote bag tweet

ten: thats OOMF another top 3 member <3 he's EVERYTHINGGGG imo the only nct member who's like absolutely a star & built to be a soloist.. i cannot wait for his second albummm i love his vision he is so so so so insanely talented it boggles the mind. and also so cool... i rarely think idols are cool but he is so cool

doyoung: he's a crazy ass hater with an evil spirit but i kind of fuck with it idk if i had to pick a second fave 127 member it would probably be him he's funny to watch. i streamed from little wave a few times also

kun: thats OOMF every time he's mentioned that he was the one who pushed for a certain song/production choice (new ride being in gmt, the strings at the end of omy) it's been one of my favourite parts of whatever the final product is so i really appreciate that. ten's kinda right about him he's so old but it's really charming to me

yuta: idrgaf. i thought his solo debut was interesting ill be giving his future stuff exactly one stream and perhaps more if the execution improves

taeyong: i think it's so funny how everyone buys the cutesy act he started going hard on immediately after his bullying scandal came out😭 loved his work on baby don't stop & call d. hated his work on everything else. every time his verse on rv's cover of be natural comes on i take a moment to curse him out

johnny: from chicago and yet so deeply charmless he gives this beautiful city a bad name. disband

[dhampiravidi]

my review of deadpool & wolverine

spoilers under the cut!

Overall, I liked it. I'll give it a 7/10.

OK so, I didn't make it through ANY of the Deadpool films w/o falling asleep & not bc I'm narcoleptic. I just got bored, which SUCKS bc Wade's my favorite Marvel character (at least in the comics/other media). I had hopes for this movie only bc of the lead actors' commitment to their characters & bc putting them in what's essentially a buddy cop movie was smart as fuck. At the same time...the MCU hasn't put out a satisfactory movie (aka 1 w/o plot holes or simply disappointing bits) since...maybe Winter Soldier? Eh, I don't remember. ANYWAY!

Considering that I didn't really see Deadpool 3, it was fairly easy for me to understand the beginning. Yes, I was a little confused at first, because I didn't know that he time-traveled & ALSO hopped universes...but I figured it out eventually. I like that they made his motivations 1) saving his found family & 2) wanting to do something worthwhile. That being said, I never wanted Deadpool to have a love interest unless it was maybe Shiklah or Lady Deadpool bc they actually DO "match his crazy" & they're interesting on their own. I also didn't know who "Pete" was until I looked him up, bc MCU!Pete isn't the same as comics!Pete. I'm used to poor fucking Bob from HYDRA 😅

Onto more plot...I knew as soon as that guy introduced himself as "Mr. Paradox", he'd be evil, bc the whole point of time is that you don't want paradoxes (if that wasn't clear). I got confused thinking that Wade was from a different universe than Logan* SO that made me think Wade was his own timeline's anchor being...yeah I realized that wouldn't make sense. The fight scene w/the TVA people was a little long but satisfying, at least in that it was as bloody & creative as a Deadpool fight scene should be.

I got worried when they mentioned The Void, bc I only made it through a few episodes of Loki before I got bored & confused. I can keep comic timelines straight if you let me read through & get to know each Earth individually, but not the way the MCU deals out timeline lore. HOWEVER, it was decent! I already knew about the Johnny cameo (stupid headline spoiler) but I was happy for Chris Evans (especially during the end credits scene) & I liked the Mad Max reference. The end credits scene was especially important bc Deadpool doesn't usually hand people over to be killed unless doing so will prevent HIM from getting into a lot of trouble. He's a merc who WILL & DOES kill, but typically he lets innocent people go.

Fuck Nicepool for being boring (but I think that was the point) & no, I did not like Channing Tatum's Gambit (I know he's from Louisiana but I HOPE that accent was bad on purpose, the headpiece was too chonky & I am loyal to the canon film Gambit *blushes*). That aside, I absolutely loved what we got of Laura, Elektra & Blade. Loved their fight scene, even though it sucked to see them go.

Cassandra Nova was appropriately sociopathic, as per the comics. I kept screaming for them to kill her, bc I KNEW she wasn't gonna turn good all of a sudden, but it made sense why she let them survive. I don't know HOW she can stick her hand into someone's head w/o killing them while they STILL feel pain (or how she didn't die after being stabbed; IDK maybe they're saying she telekinetically healed herself?). I liked how they brought back the Doctor Strange finger-thingy (wait, so does that mean the TVA has a constant problem of amateur magic-users going into different timelines on accident??).

As a comics fan, I was SO EXCITED seeing all the Deadpool variants. There were a bunch of references to Deadpool Kills the Marvel Universe, which is where (if you don't know) a version of Deadpool is psychically attacked. But instead of being brainwashed, his thought boxes (which act as his companions & consciences) disappear, only for him to realize that he's in a comic. Yes, he usually breaks the 4th wall. The problem is, he reasons that his friends keep suffering for the amusement of our world, so the only way to stop the cycle is to kill all the heroes, THEN kill the people who write the comic. ANYWAY! Killpool (I think that's what he's called) ends up getting confronted by mainstream/Good!Deadpool, who's assembled a Deadpool Corps of AU-Deadpools to fight all of the OTHER recruited Deadpools. Said DPs on the good side include Kidpool, Headpool (zombie head) & Lady Deadpool.

In other words, I rioted upon seeing all these versions who definitely have some cool backstories. When Logan & Wade went through them, I got pissed OFF ("wtf why didn't they heal?"). I thought they were gonna debate needing to kill Babypool (adorable), when everyone started waking up. I also liked how they showed someone growing back limbs, which is important considering the whole regenerative factor.

I do wonder how antimatter reacting w/matter didn't blow up the whole underground + 10005's version of New York or wherever, but there's always a plot hole. Besides, they've had lots of alien attacks. Maybe they build their undergrounds like nuclear bomb shelters.

All in all, 7/10.

*Is this Logan/Wade's universe the Fox movie universe? Bc we saw Captain Marvel's buddy, aka MVP of the shitty CM2, land there...so I assume the Fox universe is fine...but it CAN'T be THIS MOVIE's universe, bc their Logan wouldn't be that old! Also Logan isn't as old as Wade, but I'm pretty sure Wade shouldn't be chronologically just 30...? IDK if that was implied. TL;DR my precious Fox universe is fine. Thank you, nostalgia, The Good X-Men Casting & poor beloved misused Taylor Kitsch!Gambit + Anna Paquin!Rogue 😭

[rillils]

imagine post endgame bucky having to go alone, without someone to support him, to say sorry to all the people whos family he killed and he keeps saying that he didnt have a choice as his excuse

and he keeps thinking that its not a good enough excuse, that hes not good enough

no, you see, you see!! one of the things that made me uncomfortable about their treatment of Bucky, back when I was watching tf*ws, is precisely this

gonna slap this under a cut because BOY I have things to say

I WWILL NEVER STOP BEING MAD ABOUT THIS. I MEAN.

deciding that he has to apologize for all those deaths implies that he murdered those people willingly, while he was perfectly aware of his actions, of their consequences, and just did it anyways. so now, you know, he has to "atone for his sins", or make amends or whatever. so we're just going to send him off to those dead people's relatives to immolate himself because of course that's the only right thing to do. BUT idk, say what you will, this entire concept just sits wrong with me, I can't help it.

like first of all, we're acting as though killing all those people was a conscious choice on his part, as though he were completely 100% in control of himself and actively chose to murder a bunch of people, just because it suited him or something, when we know, WE FUCKING KNOW, WE HAVE BEEN LITERALLY SHOWN THIS, IT'S A RECURRING THEME IN AT LEAST 2 OF THE CAP MOVIES, that THIS. was NOT. the CASE. and fuck anyone who says any different tbh, mcu included

second, they might argue that by walking up to the victims' relatives and apologizing, Bucky's giving them closure or something, but. just. look at this from their point of view, right. as far as they're concerned, this is the guy who murdered their loved ones in cold blood, and he's just! walking free! getting away with murder(s), apparently without suffering any consequences whatsoever for all his crimes and all the grief he has caused. is that REALLY gonna give anyone closure? or is it just going to hurt them more/make them even angrier/unnecessarily reopen old wounds when there's nothing, really, that can heal or soothe them at this point, but rather just make them more painful than they already were????

so, it doesn't give them closure. and it sure as fuck doesn't give him closure, either.

they send him on this horrible, tragic, terrifying, sad errand, and all he gets out of it is torturing himself some more. seeing the pain and the hatred for him on all of these people's faces, the moment he says "yes, it was me, I pulled the trigger, I killed this person you loved". like, torture, yes, torture!! that's all this is!!! that's all it earns him!!! no peace of mind, no sense of closure, no hint of forgiveness! just more pain!!!!!!

just. I just hate this, you know, I just. I really, really hate this. I especially hate how, as you said, the way they insist on him having to personally apologize is just going to make him feel like his own hardships (aka being physically and emotionally tortured until he broke down and had his identity, agency and free will stripped away from him) were just "an excuse". as though a victim (because THAT'S what he is, THAT'S what he always was, a victim himself) needed an excuse for all his suffering. as if he brought it upon himself. as if he was "asking for it".

nah, all of this, it's just going to make his sense of guilt grow stronger and deeper over time, making him feel even more Unworthy (unworthy of love, unworthy of acceptance, unworthy of living a normal life after everything he's been put through, unworthy of friendship, unworthy of being seen as a whole person, as a human rather than a murderer) than he already felt before, making his own pain so overwhelmingly powerful that he might end up feeling like his entire existence is a mistake, and everybody would be better off if he just wasn't around anymore. and that's just so horrifying that I refuse to contemplate it.

[endlessvoidsnkittens]

I didn't realize I'd been so quiet here lately.

Gosh, a lot has happened, hasn't it?

Well, maybe not in my personal life so much, but... *gestures broadly*

ANYWAY.

My disability case is being re-evaluated. Think I mentioned that. Well in the midst of that now. I'm so pissed. I knew it was gonna happen eventually but like...ugh. It's such a hassle. And it's not looking good for me. What a terrible time to need to be reevaluated. Idk what I'm gonna do if I get denied. I guess work myself to death. Which is what they want, isn't it?

My therapist has had to take basically a leave of absence. I haven't been able to meet with them for probably a month now. FOR TOTALLY LEGIT AND UNDERSTANDABLE REASONS AND I AM NOT MAD AT THEM WHATSOEVER. But damn, it's been rough. Yes, I have my close friends, but my therapist is where it's at, haha. There's a reason why I refuse to work with anyone else at this point.

I found a new dentist. I may have commented about how I wasn't happy with my current one? However, my insurance is extremely limited with who I can see. Fortunately, through my town's FB group, I learned of one that DOES take my insurance and is also good with people who have dental anxiety and so on. I saw her this past Thursday for some pain I've been having. Unfortunately, we could not resolve the pain. Removing the filling I got 6 months ago and redoing it COULD help, but no guarantee, plus we'd be starting that healing process all over again, so we agreed to just leave it alone unless the pain becomes intolerable. I am definitely going to her for my cleaning next month. She made me feel very at ease and talked me through everything she was doing and was very warm.

My heat went out last night. My furnace started acting up. It just kept acting like it was trying to cycle on but it couldn't complete the process. So I turned it off because I didn't feel safe. Only got down to 58F in my apartment so I was pleasantly surprised. That was still tolerable to me. I wouldn't have liked to have endured that all weekend, maybe, but I actually slept pretty well last night. Nice cold room with my electric blanket... *chef's kiss* Anyway. Brought emergency maintenance out after finding out it didn't cost me anything if the outdoor temperature was below 50F. He wasn't an HVAC guy but he was able to reset my furnace and that seemed to solve the issue, at least for now. Left me with a space heater just in case. Super nice guy. Dad's age.

I'm over on Blue Sky now. Been having some fun with that. Idk how many people here are there, but if you want to find me, just lemme know. But it's a lot of shit-posting on my behalf, so you've been forewarned.

I guess that's all my news? If you follow me elsewhere you've seen / heard most of this. But I do have some Tumblr-only people. So there you go.