#to be fair i just think a lot about the reboot perhaps too much perhaps more then normal or healthy i rambled a lot asdfghj

[fabdante]

How do you think reboot Dante would feel about how DMC5 ended? Do you think it would make him try and reach out to his brother more? What do you think him meeting OG Dante, Vergil, and Nero would be like? (Side note: I think reboot Dante and Nico would get along. That woman doesn't take shit from anyone, and I think she'd have a FIELD DAY with his angel and demon powers and shapeshifting Rebellion and all the differences therein. Also, I'd love to see what she could do with Kablooey. Just because I fucking love that weapon, I would love to see what she could do with that design.)

Ok, this is going to get long so bare with me a moment asdfghj I promise I am getting to a point. I have a lot of thoughts adfghjk

TLDR: I think reboot Dante would have a lot of feelings about DMC5s ending and I do think at the end of the day it might bring him a little closer to working on that relationship with Vergil! But also there is so much going on with those two and I'm now going to spend a lot of time dissecting them under the cut

Before I answer the big question though, I'll talk about what I think Dante'd think of the preboot gang!

Preboot Dante: I think they'd get along. They're really similar people to me just at different life stages, you know? And I think as a result preboot Dante understands him. I also think they'd like similar music though preboot's way more into it and reboot Dante would love messing with him (Reboot Dante, Nirvana fan: oh that's a band :) i thought it was a t-shirt brand. Preboot Dante, og Nirvana fan from the 90s, two seconds from strangling him)

Preboot Vergil: I think reboot Dante would...I don't know the word for it, like I guess? That preboot Vergil is far more upfront then his Vergil asdfghj. Preboot Vergil doesn't really lie and manipulate he just sort of is straight up about what he's about and that's probably refreshing. I can not see them interacting for long, preboot Vergil I don't think would like him all that much and reboot Dante would not know what to say to him. (That said if he did upset preboot Dante with silly grunge jokes, that might amuse Vergil)

Nero: I think these two could be buds! They're similar in age and everything. I could see them being friends. Especially since Nico and Nero get along, I just think him and reboot Dante could get along

(Side note, I think Nico and reboot Dante would get along swimmingly! I definitely agree she'd find the angel/demon thing very interesting and they could talk about weapons and shit all day, it'd be so fun!!)

Ok, now onto the big question. What would reboot Dante think about the DMC5 ending. In which I meander a lot and ramble about the twins, their dynamics, and eventually answer the question asdfghj (all under the cut)

The reboot twins have a really interesting relationship to me.

The preboot twins have more of this begrudging acceptance of one another. Like this very 'no matter what that is my brother even if I hate him'. And I think, particularly in Dante's case where he had to live with this guilt of thinking he killed his brother only to find out that he didn't and he has this second chance to mend this relationship, that it makes Dante a lot more willing to in turn attempt to mend that relationship.

Which is not to say that I don't think the reboot twins care about each other. They are brothers and they do, before the end of the game at least, seem to want to have some sort of relationship. But it's a different dynamic.

The two Dantes to me are very similar people, nearly the same guy, just at different points of his life. Where as the Vergil's to me are very different people. While they both seek power in one way or another they're just...Very Different.

The reboot twins to me have always had this sort of tension between them that the preboot ones lack. I mean, the center of the DMC story regardless of being preboot or reboot is this family drama of the Spardas so I'm not trying to say they entirely lack that tension. But there's a very different dynamic going on with the reboot twins to me.

The main difference I think is the fact the reboot twins did not have memories of each other for the bulk of their lives and thus developed very separately. Where as preboot Dante in DMC3 knows his brother and has this past with him and there's some trust there, some need to trust there...reboot Dante kinda...doesn't have that. He gets his memory back, yeah, but he doesn't know Vergil. He knows an 7 year old version of his brother that he no longer is and there's tension in knowing that and the push and pull of wanting to know this person, knowing you on some level do know this person but also knowing that you kind of...don't know this guy. You haven't been there for all these years. This is your brother and you love him but he's a stranger.

And I don't know if reboot Dante exactly...likes what he see's with Vergil. I'm going to be borrowing a little from concepts from this post I made about reboot Dante being smarter then we all give him credit for.

There's also the different ideologies of the reboot twins. Not that preboot Dante and Vergil don't have different opinions on things. They obviously do since Vergil justifies leveling cities in attempts to gain power he feels like he's lacked his whole life and Dante thinks that's kinda messed up. But the reboot, especially in the definitive edition with that added cutscene, puts it more as a point of contention between the brothers. Vergil justifies everything he has done in the reboot because he thinks his plan is the most important thing, because he signed up for that and Dante, who didn't sign up for that, does not remotely agree (I touch on this somewhere in the middle of this really long post of Kat and Vergil things). Which, again, not different from the preboot twins. Dante believes his humanity is important and shuns the demon, thus forth believing in the inherent importance of humans and that their continued safety and existence is important. Vergil believes that his human side is weak and that humanity is expendable as a result of this and his quest for power.

However the difference between twin sets here is I don't exactly think preboot Vergil thinks he's doing any greater good? It's just that people need to die for him to get what he wants and he's indifferent to that suffering. Reboot Vergil on the other hand seems to firmly believe it is his destiny to free man kind and that what he is doing is right and justified (assumption coming from how in Vergil's downfall he tries to justify his actions to hallow Kat but also some cut dialogue that extrapolates upon things he says in game). There's also a sense of playfulness to them in the preboot that the reboot kind of lacks but that's less important I guess right now.

Reboot Dante doesn't exactly seem to trust Vergil. He seems to want to try for the sake of the fact they're brothers and they are all they have left but, again, reboot Dante isn't a very trusting person and he seems to decide very quickly that reboot Vergil is not trustworthy. He seems to spend a lot of the game in this push and pull. I argue a lot of his anger at the end of the game is the fact that Vergil broke that tentative trust and Dante saw it coming the moment he met him.

I also imagine in the aftermath of Vergil leaving (and nearly killing him), Dante probably has a lot of opinions on whatever the situation was with Vergil and Kat and her inevitable reaction to the fact Vergil is gone.

That all said, I do think at the end of the day reboot Dante does want his brother back. Vergil is his only blood family and he does seem to care about him. Even if they don't agree on much. I think also part of this is definitely from Kat, who seems to believe Vergil is worth saving and wants him alive (and still with both of them). So I don't think its incorrect to say that Dante does want to try to mend the relationship (that said I do think reboot Dante wants to do that on his terms, not Vergils)

I think if he were to see the end of DMC5 then and see the preboot twins getting along and joking and fighting together so easily that it'd cause a few things. Probably some jealousy that his brother and him did not so easily just...fall back into place like that. But also the hope that they could get along. Like if they can do it, maybe he can.

But I do think it'll take a lot of work, Vergil did burn a lot of bridges at the end there and even if Dante is willing, Vergil needs to put in the bulk of the work to earn a place back in Dante and Kats lives.

[ask-de-writer]

QUEST FOR ANCIENT CANTERLOT!  An  RP : PAGE 2, A New Plate, Old Memories!

Return to MLP Fan Fiction

Return to Role Plays with De Writer

QUEST FOR ANCIENT CANTERLOT!

An RP by @wind-the-mama-cat​ and @ask-de-writer

Scene setting Part 1 :  LUNA AWAKENS CELESTIA

Scene setting Part 2 : AIRSHIP!

Scene setting Part 3 : ONE LAST VISIT

Scene setting Part 4 : SCOUT’S PRIZE

Scene setting Part 5 : REBOOT / START UP

Scene setting Part 6 : CELESTIA AND LUNA GO TO MEET TWILIGHT

PAGE 1, THE ADVENTURE BEGINS!

PAGE 2, NEW PLATE, OLD MEMORIES!

As usual for a developing story, new text is in BOLDFACE type.

© 2021 by @wind-the-mama-cat​ and @ask-de-writer

Role Play begun 05/26/21

All rights reserved.  This document may not be copied or distributed on or to any medium or placed in any mass storage system except by the express written consent of the author.

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@wind-the-mama-cat

Learning to Fly

Wind watched as Choco and Rose put their heads together to design the potential wing suit. As she watched, her eyes drifted to Rose's wings. Once upon a time, from what she recalled from her memory files, her Unicorn overlords once tried to give her sisters a means to fly.

She shook her head silently at what she 'remembered”.

One of the Unicorn engineers had come across an ancient picture, which, interestingly, showed the Rom Pegasus Angel with her artificial wing. Using that as a basis, and nothing else, the Usurper King thought it would be a good idea to give the battle droids wings.

The results were disastrous.

During the first round of testing, the wings where too small, as they made them proportionately to Pegasi wings. They lost 20 droids.

The second round of testing went no better. While they made the wings larger, they didn't anticipate the increased power draw. They lost 30 droids.

Dark nudged Wind back to reality.

“Wind?” The black mare asked quietly. “What's on your mind?”

Wind looked down at the mare. “Just recalling somewhat painful memory files.” She nodded at Rose and Choco. “Did I ever tell you how the Unicorns tried to give their droids wings?”

Dark shook her head. “No. You never did. However, we did get reports from Princess Twilight and her scouts about falling droids with reported wings.”

Wind snorted. “The idea had merit, honestly. Instead of using ships to transport the droids, they could simply fly into battle. The way they went about it was foolish and pointless. Now that I think about it, that tends to be how they do most things.”

The earned a chuckle from the small horse.

“Where you thinking of making wings for yourself, Wind?” She asked curiously.

Wind nodded. “Aye. Perhaps.” She tapped her chest. “I'm very heavy. Even with my new legs that you gave me, I still weigh over two hundred pounds. Two hundred and fifty, if we're being specific. The wing suit that those girls are designing won't work on me.”

“So, why don't we design wings that would work for you?” Dark asked. “Thanks to the dismantling of the Renaissance, I have a surplus of material to use for pretty much anything. Even with the demands of the Hammer, I have lots of carbon fibre, copper, steel, aluminum... you name it.”

“Well, a fixed-wing style would work best, I think.” Wind said. “But I don't want permanent wings.”

“So, a backpack that straps to you, and the wings fold up and extend?” Dark asked. “That you can control with your hands?”

“Right.” Wind said with a nod.

Rose's ears quirked. “You guys are designing your own glider?”

Wind sighed. She had forgot how sensitive Rose's ears were. “Now that the cat is out of the bag... yes. Not a wing suit like your design, Rose. More of a backpack shaped glider, like your wings, but not powered.”

Rose thought for a moment. “Well, they would have to be powered. Considering your weight, an unpowered winged glider would have to have a wing span of at least 22 feet.”

Wind and Dark shared a look.

“Yeah. That math checks out.” Wind sighed.

“Now, if you were to power the backpack-glider-thing with a single, central jet turbine, that would provide enough lift for the wings to be smaller.” Rose said. “Not as small as mine, but small enough to fold up.”

“A jet turbine could work.” Wind said in agreement. “Like you wings, I take it?”

Rose nodded. “Only with 3 fans stacked on top of one another, spinning and causing thrust.”

“Right.” Dark nodded. “Really small fans. But how would you power it?”

“Not with my central crystal.” Wind admitted. “It powers me and has a high power output, but I doubt it would power me and a... jet engine.”

Choco was frowning. “This all seems very complicated.”

“I certainly am.” Wind agreed. “As a result of a combination of mechanical parts, crystals – both magic in nature – and Soulblade, I am very complicated.”

“So, why not make your glider like Fenrir?” Choco asked. Upon hearing his name, The wolf stood up from beside Dark's shop and wandered over to the group. The small horse giggled. “Oh, hey Fenrir.”

Dark kneeled in front of the wolf and placed her hand on his cheek. “You're just like Wind, Pup. Technical and magic in nature.”

He blinked slowly at her.

“So, a separate crystal to power my wings.” Wind nodded. “Sounds like a good place to start.” She looked at Dark. “Now, a large egg-sized crystal would be impractical. One the size that powers me would be best.”

Scout giggled. “Except your chest crystal took most of my magic to charge, and it's maintained by your food processing systems.” She pointed out. “A jet pack with wings would require more power.”

“Well, my crystal is the size of a lemon... and Fenrir's is the size of a dragon egg. So...” Wind thought out loud. “Say somewhere in between.”

“A phoenix egg.” Dark said. “As for charging it? We can use my solar charger. It worked for Fenrir after all.”

“Right.” Scout said. “We can all work together on this project. If Wind is going to be testing this new technology, and Choco is going to be testing hers, safety is paramount. Lots of prototypes and testing and scale models, just like Dark said earlier.”

The five girls got to work on their glider project. Rosie and Choco worked on their wing suit, while Dark, Wind and Scout work on theirs. Occasionally, the two groups would stop and share notes, and miniature models, and other ideas.

Eventually, after a week of testing, Choco's first prototype suit was ready for a test flight.

Wind's jetpack however was far from ready, as it was more complicated.

On the morning of the day that Choco was ready to go up, with Rosie's help, that is, Dark got a call on her mirror.

“This is Dark.” She greeted the other Rom.

“Dark? This is Nala of the Topographical and Plate Locator Scout Team.” Nala greeted. “We discovered a new plate, just below plate 16. We're calling it plate 17 for now. It's three plates below your plate.”

Dark nodded. “Have you scouted it yet?”

“Not yet.” Nala answered. “It's mostly desert. Naturally desert, to be honest. Not like the desert plate like plate 1, which formed when the unicorns took the water with them during the shift.”

“Wait.” Dark said suddenly. “Are you saying that plate 17 is originally desert?”

“We are.” Nala nodded. “It does have a stream however, which wasn't affected by the shift either, surprisingly.”

Dark blinked. “Well... that means...” She nodded. “Don't worry about scouting that plate. I'll go and scout it myself.”

“Roger that, Dark.” Nala smiled. “Nala out.”

Wind and the others looked at Dark. “Dark?”

The small mare smiled coyly. “Wind... you have Wind's memories. What's the one location that is desert, but has enchanted water that no magic can affect?”

“The desert that the Rom originated from.” Wind answered. “Where...”

Dark smiled when Wind trailed off. “Marchhare's original resting place.”

“Whoa.” The gathered Rom gasped.

“We'd have to go and look for ourselves.” Dark said. “But I'll bet a hundred bits that it is there somewhere.”

“Isn't that also the location of the Lost Wood mines?” Choco asked. “It's a story that we Forest Horses grew up on.”

Dark shrugged. “I'll have to go and see.” She looked at Wind. “Wind? I'll need you to come too. Your scanning systems and memories will help me.”

Rosie nodded. “That makes sense. As old as I am, I won't really be of help. Besides, I want to stay here and work on my suit.”

Scout pouted. “And since Midnight has me on stress-rest, I can't go either.” Wind smiled and hugged her.

Dark smiled. “We'll have to hire a glider team.” She looked at De Writer as he, Tia and Midnight came wandering over to help with the glide test.

“Some good news, De Writer...” Dark said as she explained the call she just got.

@ask-de-writer

Old De Writer thoughtfully stroked his beard as he thought through the news.  Nodding, he agreed, “That MIGHT be a portion of the old Sunset Mountains and Celestia's Anvil.  The many disruptions caused by the Shattering did actually open some new springs, so what was seen might not be Sha Ja Shehan. “There appears to be a modest river with a valley on the opposite side from the observed desert. It would not be at all unlikely that it is part of the old Red Branch and fed by the Maze.  If so, it could even hold Morton's Swale and the ancient Wood Mines.”

The others were staring at him and slowly realizing what they knew but never really had to grasp.  The amazement showed on their faces as it came home to them just how ancient De Writer was.  He was speaking of those places and times as if they were recent memories.  Places and times that were lost in the mists of time, thousands of years BEFORE the Shattering.

Choco looked over to Dark, whose eyes had gone puffy with tears and slowly sorted out, “Dark, if you find Marchhare's Lake, do you think that maybe he is there?”

Wings shuddering with suppressed sobbing, Dark sat and shook her head. “No, Choco, not really.  After he came back from the Lake of Paradise, we could never speak to him at his Lake.”  She gave a slightly broken smile as she snickered at the memory, “Unless he was right there beside us laying a stone for himself.  The first time that he did that the Rom had been on the Roads of Equestria for 844 years.  He thought that laying a stone for himself was a great joke!”

Putting her face in her hands, she wailed, “I miss him so much!”

Choco looked on helplessly.  Knowing that Dark was immortal did not prepare her for the consequence of carrying grief that could last five hundred years and still be this raw.  She quietly sorted out that Immortality had some serious drawbacks.

Midnight crouched down and simply wrapped Dark in her midnight blue wings, holding her and gently rocking the weeping pegasus.

She murmered, “We know, Dear, we know.  Tia and I Laid the Stones for him ourselves.  Sometimes with him along side us, cracking a joke. He was always serious about the actual Stone Laying and saying that he was glad that we were taking such good care of his bones.”

Dark looked up from her crying and wondered, “Even if we find the right place, will there be anything left?  Five hundred years is a long time for his bones to be un attended.  He could just be weathered away to nothing.”

It was Tia who thoughtfully answered that.  “Dark, dear, if nothing else has scattered his bones but weathering, there should still be traces.  Teeth should last and some other larger, heavier portions of bone.  His harness had metal fittings.  As dry as that area always was and, according to scouting reports, still is, those should still remain.

“There is another there that we might find as well.  On the old river course side of the mountains was the Wayside where Sando went to the Lake. Finding him would be a wonderful treasure.”

Dark nodded slowly, “That is true.  If this is the right plate, it holds a number of treasures, some of them are more valuable than just physical things.”

De Writer looked about and suggested, “We are going to need a big cargo glider to carry this crowd.  I suggest that we all set up packs of supplies for exploring and then contact Air Trafic Control to see about getting a large enough glider to carry this expedition.”

It was Midnight who pointed out, “We mustn't forget to take along at least a pair of Stones.  One for Sando's Lake and one for Marchhare's.  It has been too long since they got that simple bit of respect and our love for them.”

Dark had to grin and pretend to calculate, “Let's see, five hundred years, at at least two visits a year, that makes about a thousand stones EACH.  Me, Wind, De Writer, Midnight, Tia, and Choco makes about SIX THOUSAND STONES to carry.  I don't think that there is any glider on any Rom plate that can carry that much along with us and our supplies!”

Midnight snickered and suggested, “Maybe we that have wings could carry the stones, IF we flap REALLY HARD.  Then, the glider could be a lot smaller!”

De Writer snorted, “If you all were mimes, you couldn't find your way out of a box that isn't there!  Let's all go and pack for the trip.”

Back at De Writer's Fair, the old pony quietly took Dark into his arms and gently rocked the small black pegasus.  Softly, he offered, “All of us that knew him, miss him dreadfully, Dark.  I wish that I could tell you that he will be there, waiting for us at his Lake.  Not even I can tell you that without a lie.  Wherever he has gone, I am certain of one thing.  He knows how much you love him.”

She quietly sniffled, “I do know that, De Writer.  It must sound really nutty to say this, but I want to show him how much I love him by playing Poison Grandpa one more time.”

De Writer nodded gravely as he agreed, “I actually do understand that, Dark, my dear.  With you, it makes perfect sense.

“Now, about packing for this little expedition.  We are going to need cartographic equipment and supplies to map the new plate.  Let's see, a first aid kit, a tent and sleeping bags.  Anything else?”

Dark grinned her shark like grin and retorted, “Food.  You don't really need it and I can survive without it, being immortal, but I really detest starving.”

De Writer snorted, “Right.  It is a comfortable habit and the others might not really like it if we forget it.  Some of them will starve without it and Tia and Midnight just recovered from starving for five hundred years.  They might not appreciate doing it again so soon.”

Dark was quickly to work packing things into neat bundles.  She casually added a pair of picks and shovels.  “Might need to dig some if that plate is where the old wood mines ended up.  Could be useful for other things as well.”

@wind-the-mama-cat

Holding Close

  Wind watched her “cousin” Dark gather their supplies. She knew that the Rom gliders were big, and could carry a lot of weight. However, with over six thousand semi-precious stones, and mining equipment, and food and water, not to mention 4 adult sized Rom, and Dark, they would need three gliders to get to the new plate.

She walked over to her now Wife, Scout with a thought.

“Scout?” She asked, as she sat down next to the Horse in the shade of their caravan, “I don’t suppose there’s a spell you could use to make all of our supplies feather weight, by chance?”

Scout shook her head. “Spells like that would need to be in constant use. Even for someone like Tia and Midnight, it would be exhausting.”

The cat-bot pursed her lips. “Darn. Looks like we will need to go with three gliders then.” She sighed heavily. “Not to mention, getting back up once we’re done with our exploring with all the added weight.”

“It’s a shame Auntie Esper isn’t here.” Rosie chirped as she doubled check Choco’s wing suit. “Out of all the Rom, thanks to the Spirit that lived within her, she could teleport unlimited weight miles and miles without breaking a sweat.” She shrugged. “She could move all of you down to the new plate, and all the equipment.”

Wind looked at Scout. “She could?”

Scout nodded. “From what I was told be De Writer, the first week Esper came to the Rom, she shifted 10 caravans and all the horses about 2 miles, all by herself.” She smiled at the thought. “Not even Black Lotus could have done that.”

Rosie looked at Choco. “Are you ready to test our first prototype, Choco?”

The young mare nodded. “Roger.”

The pink cat pulled the shoulder straps of the parachute tight. “I’ll be right up there with you, but it never hurts to have a back up.”

Choco nodded in agreement. “Better safe than sorry.”

Rosie pointed up. “I’m going to fly you up to the Ponyville plate directly above us.” She scooped Choco up Bridal style, spread her wings, revved her turbines, and took off.

Wind stood up. “I’m going to go help De Writer pack.” She bent down and kissed Scout on the nose. She walked over to the Blue horse’s caravan, and opened the door. “Need help, De Writer?”

He looked at her and smiled. “Can’t seem to find my Pre-Shattering maps.” He said as he shuffled through his bookshelves. “Mind going through my chest?”

Wind shrugged. “Sure.” She knelt in front of De Writer’s chest, and opened it. She gasped as the inside of the chest appeared to be as large as his caravan, and deeper. It also appeared to hold everything the Old Horse ever owned over his entire life. She looked inside it, and did a double take at the outside of it. “Uh…”

De Writer chuckled. “Just think  about what you want, and it will appear in front of you.”

Wind thought about the maps, and lo and behold, a green, ordinary looking, shoulder bag appeared in front of her. “What the hay?” She grabbed the bag and stood up. “So, uh… I thought of the maps, and this old looking shoulder bag, um, appeared.”

De Writer walked over to Wind, and took the bag from her. Tears played at his eyes as a serene smile a came to his face. “Oh my… I had forgotten that I had this.” He looked at Wind. “This is Wind’s bag of holding.” He chuckled. “She took this bag everywhere with her. In fact, it was this bag that helped me design my chest.”

“It’s larger on the inside?” Wind asked.

“Much.” De Writer answered. “You are familiar with the concept of infinity, yes?”

Wind nodded.

“Well, this bag of holding… is infinite.” He explained. “Or more like a gateway to a self-contained dimension of infinity. She could put anything in this bag, any object of any size, of any weight, so long as it could fit through the opening, and carry it with her.” He smiled. “And to find an object within the bag, just like my chest, all you had to do is think of it.”

“And the bag… wouldn’t get heavier?” Wind asked.

De Writer smiled. “Exactly.” He reached into the bag, and pulled out his maps. “Here they are.” He set them on the table, and then reached into the bag again. He pulled out a pink, well worn, cloak. “Oh my…”

Wind’s forehead crystal flashed. “My cloak.”

De Writer sniffled and set the bag down on the floor. He then held the cloak with both hands and held it at arms length. “Yes, Wind. This is your cloak. You remember it, don’t you?”

“I…” Wind but her lower lip briefly. “Mama Dragon gave it to Wind… on her 16th birthday. It belonged to Shia, her other mother.”

“Indeed.” He brought it closed to his nose and sniffed it. “Wind loves this cloak. She wore it that night she… passed to the Dream World.”

“Passed to the… huh?” Wind blinked. “She didn’t travel to the Lake of Paradise?”

“No.” The blue horse said. “Even though she was a Rom, first and foremost, she was the Watcher of her World. Watchers… don’t really die. When they find their Dragon, their life force becomes connected to the Source. As they use the source, their Dragon, they age, grow old, and when the Source is used up, they simply fade away.”

“Where do they go, if not the Lake of Paradise?” Wind asked gently.

“The Dream.” De Writer answered. “They join the other Watchers, along with their mates.”

“So, Wind and Penny… are together again?” the cat asked. “In the Dream? Along with Mama Dragon?”

“I can only guess, but I certainly hope so.” He smiled as he handed the cloak to her. “Here. She would have wanted you to have this.”

Wind took it and draped it over shoulders, fastening the brass clasp. “Thank you, De Writer.” She looked at the bag. “De Writer… I think we have the solution to our weight problem.”

“Weight problem?” He repeated. “Oh, with all of our supplies.” He looked down at the innocent looking bag. “Yes. I do believe you are correct, Wind.” He picked it back up and held it out for her to take. “This is as much yours as it was the other Wind’s.”

Wind took it and held at arms length. “Is there anything else that once belonged to Wind? I mean, with Rosie here now, should she not get some of her mother’s belongings?”

“I understand what you’re saying, Wind.” De Writer sighed. “I actually do have something for Rosie, that once belonged to Wind.” He walked over to the chest, rustled around some, and pulled out a silver looking chain shirt.

“Wind’s mithril shirt.” He said as he stood up. “Her birthday is next week, and I was going to give it to her then.”

“Oh.” Wind said. “I…”

“Rosie is not the jealous type.” De Writer said simply. “Sure, when she first met you, she was a little sore about Soulblade, but she understands that the blade is not inherited, She chooses herself whom she goes to.” He placed a hand on her shoulder. “Wind was my daughter, and I want you to have the cloak and bag. Rosie has no need for them, trust me.”

“And she won’t think I’m… trying to emulate her mother?” Wind asked. “Become more like her?”

“No.” De writer assured her with a gentle tone as he put the shirt away and closed the lid to the chest. “But come, let’s go help Dark pack for our trip.” He picked up his maps, and The two Rom headed out of his caravan. “Speaking of Rosie, where is she?”

Wind pointed up. “Choco is about to jump of the edge of Rom plate #2, to test her wing suit prototype.”

9 miles up, standing on the edge of Ponyville plate #2, Rosie watched as her marefriend tested the flexibility of her wingsuit.

The wings were made from a very thin, yet strong, carbon fiber cloth, and held together using a light-weight from of rom wood grass. Each wing was ten feet in width, and in theory, could sustain flight, when not being pulled by a Pegasi, for 18 miles.

“So our goal today is to fly straight.” Rosie reminded her. “No maneuverability tests. We’re just seeing how the wingsuit performs under weight, and checking for stress points.” She smiled. “And testing a smooth landing.”

Choco nodded nervously. “Roger.”

Rosie pulled down her goggles, and watched as Choco did the same. “I’ll be right beside you.” She pointed to the Edge of the Rom Plate #1. “Aim for the Rom Gunner Battery. It’s about 18 miles away.”

Choco gulped and nodded, and spread her wings. “For science…”

Some time later, Rosie landed at Edge Battery #10 and looked up to the sky. She watched as Choco angled her body to slow her decent.

“Knees bent, Choco!” Rosie encouraged her. “Slow yourself, just like we practiced!”

Choco landed a little faster and rougher then she had planned. Rosie acted quickly and caught her.

“I’m shaking…” Choco said through chattering teeth as Rosie hugged her.

“That’s the adrenaline.” Rosie said softly as she stroked Choco’s back. “It will wear off in a minute.”

Choco took deep breaths as she tried to calm herself. “That’s one heck of a rush. You know… flying. Or falling with style.”

Rosie giggled “I felt the same way when I tried to fly for the first time. I was one. You get used to it the more you do it.”

Choco giggled too as she slowly stopped hovering.

“Hey.” A voice said suddenly.

Rosie looked to her left. It belonged to the Wrecker captain, Nala. A beige mare Pegasus with long red hair.

“We had sights on your flight the entire time.” Nala said with an approving nod. “You did really well, Choco.”

Choco smiled “Thank, Nala.”

The Captain examined the suit. “So, you girls are just going with a personal glider approach, huh? No sustained flight?”

Rosie let Choco go. “We discussed that. We just want to make a personal, short-range glider to use on the Penny’s Hammer.”

“18 miles is short ranged?” Nala asked.

“Yeah.” Rosie nodded. “Most large wing gliders have a glide ratio of 4 to 1. We were 9 miles up. So, we got a glide ratio of 2 to 1. Not bad for a prototype.”

Nala looked towards De Writer’s fair. “So, um, how are you guys going to get back?”

Rosie smiled and scooped Choco up bridal style again. “I’ll fly her back.” Her wings revved up as she took off.

18 miles later, she landed back in De writer’s fair and set Choco down gently. “You okay Choco?”

Choco nodded absent mindedly. “Huh? Oh. Yeah. Okay. Just… feeling overwhelmed.” She removed her parachute, handed it Rosie. She then unzipped her suit and stepped out of it. “I think I just need a nap.”

Rosie nodded in understanding. “Oh. Sure. Want me to wake you for lunch?”

Choco smiled “Sure.” She handed the suit to Rosie. “We need handles on the wings. Holding onto the wings by the top bar was really difficult.” She yawned and headed into her caravan.

Rosie watched her go, and didn’t notice Scout sidle up to her. “How’d the test go?”

The Catter started for a second. “Gah!” She calmed down and looked at Scout. “It went well. I have to make some changes to it, no surprise there. It is work in progress after all.” She looked towards Wind, De Writer and Dark packing for the trip.

“Is… that my mother’s…” She walked over to the group and up to Wind. “Is that My Mama’s bag?”

Wind looked down at her. “De Writer took it the night your Mother passed on to the Dream. He gave it to me.”

Rosie nodded “Well, that solves your weight issue.” She looked to De Writer. “Are you guys leaving soon?”

@ask-de-writer

TO BE CONTINUED 

Return to MLP Fan Fiction

Return to Role Plays with De Writer

Scene setting Part 1 :  LUNA AWAKENS CELESTIA

Scene setting Part 2 : AIRSHIP!

Scene setting Part 3 : ONE LAST VISIT

Scene setting Part 4 : SCOUT’S PRIZE

Scene setting Part 5 : REBOOT / START UP

Scene setting Part 6 : CELESTIA AND LUNA GO TO MEET TWILIGHT

PAGE 1, THE ADVENTURE BEGINS!

PAGE 2, NEW PLATE, OLD MEMORIES!

[andmaybegayer]

Last Monday of the Week 2023-09-18

Not getting a whole lot of "autumn" vibes from this thing

Listening: Many things, but the one that has been stuck in my head is once again from Siege Ubsessed! by Curta'n'Wall. A New Castle is Born. Do you want a song about. A castle? Yes, you do.

Bonus track: whatever the hell is going on in The Dark Ages

Reading: Finished Perhaps The Stars the other day. I am increasingly convinced that Neal Stephenson has the right idea on how to end most things. The end of Perhaps the Stars is good but it's less good than the rest of the series. The book is wild, so much happens, it's a dramatic change of pace from the prior books, both way more happens and it's far slower.

9A. I am mixed on 9A. As a narrator they do not feel like the 9A. To be fair, Mycroft also does not feel like he would be a great Anonymous either. Still.

Stephenson, yes. Stephenson's books end like an 80's pop song, they just hit a peak and then fade out before you can realize it's happened. An extremely effective way to fill you with what the fuck was that great.

I like the ideas in Terra Ignota immensely. I like the style and the world of Terra Ignota a great deal. I'm not actually sure if I like the prose in Terra Ignota that much.

I do appreciate how the final chapters serve as a sort of proxy for the thoughts you've probably been having while you read the series. The various peoples who have had to just endure the clashing hives get to stand up and go you guys realize an empire is not a good thing right.

Playing: Breath of the Wild, beat Vah Rudania, the Salamander beast. One left, plus maybe four or five more memories, and I do want to track down a couple more of the side quests before I hit the endgame but I feel like I'm probably not going to come back to this much after I beat Ganon.

Also beat the snow dragon Naydra fight which was a really good setpiece. You get the reveal that it's been corrupted by Ganon, which is a great oh shit moment when you think you might have to fight it. You don't but it's still a good mobility challenge. I have some video.

Watching: Nothing really.

Making: Getting back in the CAD saddle for printing things reminds me why I still keep Autodesk Fusion installed in Windows. FreeCAD is great but it has idiosyncrasies that make it less than ideal for even moderately complicated parts. Chief among these is that it is a CAD package with no first class concept of an assembly, anything involving multiple bodies is arduous as fuck.

As a result I am trying out Onshape, the cloud/web CAD package, because at least I can run that in Linux rather than rebooting. I'm going to try and see if I can spin up Fusion 360 (or maybe even SolidEdge for the first time in, god, almost a decade) in Wine/Proton/Whatever but Onshape is promising. Despite the cloud bullshit it handles pretty much like any other professional-ish CAD package.

Tools and Equipment: I have been shaving with a old fashioned safety razor for almost a year now. I had a cheap one from the grocery store but I bought that fancy precision machined aluminium one because I like the concept of a safety razor that barely exposes a blade at all. It has been good.

As a teenager my parents deemed me too ADHD to be allowed even a cartridge razor, and for years I fought with electric razors that left crappy finishes and couldn't get anywhere near what I'd call clean. When I was in University I was like "Man it cannot be that hard to use a cartridge razor" and sure enough it wasn't. The problem I have with cartridge razors is that they clog in seconds and keeping them clear is a pain in the ass. Cuts are even less likely with this fancy one but even with a plain old safety razor it's remarkably hard to injure yourself unless you really aren't paying attention.

Safety razors are marginally more dangerous than cartridge razors but you can clear shaved hair extremely easily which means they cut like a dream for a while and they aren't as frustrating to work with. The fact that blades cost like US¢25 a piece even for slightly fancier ones is a nice touch that makes me much less likely to keep using blades long after they're too blunt to serve.

[spocks-evil-godmother]

just some tuvok thoughts

tuvok is my favorite voyager character (sorry seven) and i think he is just great, and specifically i think he is great in how he relates to other people. to maybe give voice to the thing i am thinking of, it is that tuvok is interesting because he is the third iteration of a chief of security and the second vulcan to have a like really central role.

to the latter point, this is very obviously because leonard nimoy as spock was just SO iconic and so defining for TOS that i think it was very fair for TNG especially to avoid adding a vulcan and risk a sense of "redoing" the character (because everyone would hate that) and together with DS9 creating a distinct and fleshed-out universe that didn't necessarily revolve around the same exact themes of TOS. as sequels, not reboots, they could wander into their own territory and make their own way, which meant not looking at vulcans as a very central part of the stories. i get why they waited until VOY.

when it comes to the chief of security part, that is interesting then because finally, we return to vulcans, who have not been people on the main cast since TOS, placed in this bridge officer role that did not exist on TOS. tasha yar was the first COS, then worf, and then odo. in the case of all three characters, i feel like there is something fairly unVulcan about all of them. yar sought out security as a resolution to a chaotic childhood filled with violence; safety is a profoundly emotional experience for her. worf's central arc generally relates to becoming an honorable warrior—though interpersonally worf can be standoffish or brusque, when there is a cultural expectation for emotional display in battle, worf always rises to the occasion. odo, like worf, can be brusque (perhaps even harsh, or cold). i feel like there's something to be said about how perhaps ideally we would read these characters as being fairly unemotional—but then, when I think about how much they display anger (not necessarily inappropriately! just that they are often angry or annoyed) I think that isn't true at all. in fact, between all those characters, i feel like they together make the case that to be a good chief of security (or warrior, or defender of justice) you must be angry, because your anger makes you both powerful and attuned to the needs of those you love, when they need you. worf and odo love BIG.

enter tuvok, who does not experience love (or love, as we might feel it).

though equally impersonal and detached as the others, in some regards, tuvok has none of the big love or big anger that his forerunners have held. he is vulcan, and the last vulcan we've seen on a bridge has shown how well-suited vulcans are to be dispassionate scientists, just the facts please and thank you. what would motivate a logical, unemotional being to become a defender?

and like on a practical level, i don't know. backstory is whatever. but i think if i am asking myself, what does logic bring to the role of protector?, then my answer is evaluation.

obviously i am just ranting and raving about tuvok because i watched the season 2 episode "innocence" today BUT this episode really does encapsulate what i love in him and i think what the writers wanted us to love in him as well. certainly, there is a lot of humor in mr. very serious being confronted with three children who just want to play play play!!! but there is a lot of seriousness there, too. it's very serious that tuvok runs into frightened children and says, i will stay with you and watch over you. it is serious that they tell him there is a monster in the darkness and they are afraid of it, and he says, my sensors do not detect the presence of a monster, but the absence of readings does not confirm the absence of a monster; i will stay with you and watch over you. and it is serious still that when a little girl who is afraid of dying alone asks him to save her, he assures her that he cannot interrupt her natural life cycle but understands that she will only feel safe enough to leave if he is with her; i will stay with you and watch over you.

in no moment is tuvok himself taken over by his emotions. he calmly evaluates every situation. he listens to the children. he soothes them. and, as strange as it seems, he entertains their fears. he admits that he cannot confirm the nonexistence of a monster, but if there is a monster it is not nearby so it's okay to sleep and if it comes nearby he will be awake to chase it away. i think what is the most stunning thing about tuvok is that he is sympathetic to but completely unafraid of the children's emotions. are they like kinda annoying him, sure. but he accepts their emotions as they are—he does not feel pressured by their fear to change his own behavior. and his ability to evaluate it all, the situation, the children, the future, is the thing that creates the sense of safety that ultimately allows the children to die peacefully.

this episode's probably most iconic moment (or maybe i just think about it all the time idk) is when a child asks him if being vulcan means he doesn't love his own children, and tuvok replies, "My attachment to my children cannot be described as an emotion. They are part of my identity, and I am incomplete without them."

we could make a whole post about that, if we wanted, but i gotta go to bed. instead, i would just posit that the same is true for the identity tuvok has built for himself as a chief of security and a defender. his motives in protecting others are not because of an emotion. he is not angry, or sad, or scared, or upset. but it is logical to maintain the safety of a community to maintain to order of a community—and through experience and effort he has learned how to evaluate whether or not something is safe.

and, i think, if you are a little child, and you think, maybe there is a monster going to eat me, and possibly this is the scariest thing that has ever happened to you, the kindest thing a grown-up can do is say "i don't see any monsters, but i am prepared in the event that they show up. i will stay with you and watch over you. good night."

[praphit]

Guardians Vol 3: A fatty, salty gift.

(No Spoilers)

May I be honest be with you? I’ve been thinking about letting my PMB card (Proud Marvel Bitch) expire.  I know. I KNOW. Perish the thought, right??

I've been defending Marvel throughout all of the recent tough times. 

While errbody out there was talkin smack, I defended you, Marvel!

When people said "Thor 4" was too goofy & had tone problems, 

I said "LOOK, this dude just got his body back, his lady back, and his hammer back. Let him have some fun! Quit being a grump!"

When people said that "The Multiverse of Madness" suffered from too much CGI. 

I said "LOOK, it's called THE MULTIVERSE OF MADNESS! It's about a fight between a Magical Doctor of Strangeness and a Super Witch! Give me ALL of the effects & colors! There can't be enough CGI! How were y'all expecting anything other than an overload of all of that?! You just want them to duke it out in one room, throwing Skittles and glitter at each other??!"

When people said that She-Hulk didn't have no business twerkin with Megan Thee Stallion.

I supported that badly CG'd booty! "If ya got it, shake it!" is what I said.

And then, "Ant-Man 3 happened.... 

THEN, J.Majors had his... alleged... issue...

THEN, I saw that "The Marvels" trailer... a movie that no one is asking for... 

I wouldn't say that my faith in Marvel is broken, but doubt has certainly crept in.

Can these Guardians of Vol 3 restore my faith? - maybe, but it ain't gonna be easy.

They're kind of a mess right now. Rocket is playing what I call "The Secret Sadness Game". 

Have you ever played that game? -  I bet you have. It's when something is wrong with you; you're very sad, but you're not letting anyone know about it. It's a horrible game. Nobody wins in that game, but it's apparently popular these days, with social media making us all pretend to be happy, dignified, and pretty all of the time. So, popular that Mantis is playing that game a lil bit as well.

Drax is too simple-minded to play that game 

(side note: Dave Bautista [Drax]  said that Marvel dropped the ball concerning Drax's story. And I couldn't agree more. There's a lot to explore with his back story, but... I'm hoping that they'll either reboot the Guardians cartoon series or give Drax a "What If... " story. That show really likes depressing people; here's a golden opportunity.)

Groot is... 

well, Groot.

And Nebula (whom I LOVE!) 

is grumpier than a lot of us Marvel fans have become. To be fair she has to keep all of these bozos together while Peter aka Starlord is getting drunk and dropping F-Bombs. 

He still hasn't gotten over Gamora.

I was going to be a jerk and say that he should have gotten over her by now, BUT I forgot that she’s kinda dead, but kinda not... (#ComicbookUniverseProblems)

It's hard to move on when your lover IS dead, but... still around, kinda, you know?? (If you actually don’t know, then... wow, you’ve got a lot of catching up to do)

I know (in the Christmas Special) they brought Peter the gift of Kevin Bacon to cheer him up, but maybe they should have brought him a woman. A good 80's star like he likes... maybe Heather Locklear 

or Kathy Ireland. Remember her?

Not the best message though, I guess - "If you're depressed, then simply drown yourself in booze and pretty women (whom only exist to make you happy :)." But, he's kinda there anyway.

Like I said, they're a mess.

But, if one thing can bring family together it's tragedy.

Something bad happens to one of The Guardians, they sober-up the Starlord, wash his mouth out with soap, and they're off on an adventure!

Mostly a typical Guardians jam. I know some have complained about too many laughs while serious things are going on, but they kinda started all of that in the MCU. And to be fair, if you have survived as much as they have, perhaps you'd be laughing more in the face of danger as well. I loved the comedy duo of Mantis & Drax. And the... unromantic comedy duo/toxic partnership of Peter & Gamora.

  And with Nebula (WHOM I LOVE!) in the middle of it all... PERFECTION.

The colorful new worlds and creatures we meet are cool. And the CGI is excellent. I don't know where those artists were when She-Hulk and MODOK were being created, 

but whatever:) The action is excellent!  A lot of murdering going on here for a PG-13 rating, when you stop and think about it, but I loved every non-drop of mostly non-existent blood.

The stuff that's different is the darker tones in here. There's some serious drama happening in this film. Of course we have more of Peter’s brokenhearted ass, but there are a lot of family dynamic stuff here as well. There's plenty of funny bickering between them, but it's also covering up some pain that the movie gets into.

Plus, we learn about Rocket's origin. That's when things get really dark and cruel. His past sucked. You WILL get emotional.  Especially when in his story we meet our villain

THE HIGH EVOLUTIONARY.

He brings new meaning to the word "Narcissist", and you will hate him. There's a lot to hate. He's pretty much getting his Dr. Frankenstein on, using parts from animals, humanoid creatures, and robotics. His victims suffer much and he don't give a SHIT!

Bradley Cooper (Rocket) is good! I always forget that he's part of the Marvel Universe. I was kinda hoping that Rocket's origin included being Bradley Cooper, but had his brain removed and put in a raccoon. And maybe something similar with Groot

Some dark stuff, but also a lot of LOL moments. I think they maneuvered the tones well.

I do wish that we got more of my main woman Debicki!

  And like many, I had hoped for more Adam Warlock, but I know time was tight in that regard. 

That's prob my main complaint about the film - TIME. It's 2hrs and 30 mins ----- TOO LONG, and yet the endings for these characters seemed rushed. Like... where they end up, individually, makes sense, but it feels like we skipped some emotional steps.

This is Rocket's story, and it's full of laughs, feels, and bad ass action! I really enjoyed this movie! PMB card renewed!

Grade: B+

What made this movie extra enjoyable for me was the news that someone dies in this movie (NOT a spoiler. I already told you about all of the murder. Murder always begats more murder, kids.

Any explosion near The Guardians --- NOOOO! One of them gets shot --- NOOOOO! Any time one of them was alone --- NOOOO! Eating a delicious, fatty, salt encrusted meal---- Heart Disease, NOOOOOO! On the toilet ---- isn't that how Elvis died? or is that a myth? People die that way though.

. What an interesting way for a Marvel character to die. “We'll all remember when Mantis crapped herself to death.” :)

NOOOOOOO!

Although, anxiety-inducing, it was certainly a more exciting way to watch. It was a kind of a gift. A gift which I now leave with you.

[galactic-pirates]

13, 14, and 16 for the fic writer asks, please!

Yay thank you for the ask!

13) What’s a common writing tip that you almost always follow? Ooof erm. I always feel like I wind up picking at the phrasing of these questions, like what qualifies as being 'common' and does 'almost always' mean exactly that rather than always? I'm probably trying to be too precise but this is just how my brain is.

You see I was going to say "maintain POV" as opposed to head hopping, but I always maintain POV these days, as I trained myself out of the head hopping.

For an 'almost always' I think I'm going to say "schedule writing time" - aka that quote about... (let me google) “I write only when inspiration strikes. Fortunately it strikes every morning at nine o'clock sharp.” -W. Somerset Maugham." - basically it's about being disciplined. Make a commitment and show up for yourself, and for your story. I almost always try and do this. It's not easy, some days I procrastinate badly and don't get a lot done, but I still have my butt in the chair, and that's half the battle sometimes. I don't do everyday though. Tried it, couldn't make it work. I aim for 5 days a week and I can 'undesignate' days if I have appointments or something is going on. The important thing is on any day it's possible, I show up for the writing.

14) How do you write emotional scenes? Do you ever feel what the characters feel? Do you draw from personal experiences? I don't consciously draw from personal experience. Indeed I very rarely have any kind of matching experience with my characters (my life is far too limited) but I know fear, I know pain, I know shame etc. and I guess that helps in the abstract. It's a bit like a jigsaw puzzle, piecing it altogether.

I know the scenario, I know the character, I know their personality, their history etc. Because different characters would obviously react with different emotions even to the same scenario. So I have to work out what kind of emotional reaction is right for the character in that moment and how they would portray that. Somebody might be feeling something intensely inside, but now show it much on the outside. Somebody else might throw things, scream or cry etc.

I don't think I feel what the characters do, but at the same time I do think it does affect me somehow. Like it's not "sad scene = sad Sam" but maybe the intensity? I find that I have more of an extreme reaction to things. So perhaps writing emotional scenes makes me more sensitive?

16) How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them? I can't 100% recall how my fanfic ideas I had on my list when I decided to quit fanfic. I get nostalgic sometimes. I really wanted those ideas to exist BUT just because they won't as fanfic, doesn't mean that a spark of them won't one day exist in an original story of mine.

For example I always wanted to write a Bering and Wells tropetastic Christmas story. Well who says that one day I can't write the fake dating, bringing a colleague home for the holidays, snowed in, huddling together for warmth, oh no there's only one bed etc. lesbian romance. It's certainly on my list.

I have well over half a dozen different series ideas, and a few standalone novel concepts. I got first drafts of a fair few 'Book Ones' as I have jumped from project to project, not sticking with a series or even a genre. I'm trying to be a bit more disciplined about that from now on. I picked a series and started to reboot it this year. I redrafted Book One and I should probably start the revision on it tomorrow. Then onto Book Two. There's six books in this series and it does make me a little sad sometimes to think I'm unlikely to write anything else for a couple of years. I think I'll always have more ideas than time/spoons.

[storiesofraen]

Updates on this page!

Good evening everyone, hope you’re all alive and well. This post is meant to be an update to what I can and will put on the blog and since I love writing so much and always have so many things to say, I thought I should at least give you a proper update.

My daily driver phone

As you all know I use a Redmi Note 10 Pro and I really enjoy using android in general, but lately the phone has given me endless problems and I don't think I can keep up anymore. Why is that?

For starters, my phone was already giving out last year with the MIUI 13 update. When I updated it last year I already began facing problems that quite disturbed my daily routine both in my personal and professional life. For example, the keyboard stopped working and I had to reboot the phone everytime this problem occured. A real kick in the nuts, but I managed to pull through.

Then, I had to wipe the data off the phone completely because for some reason one day when I was off to work my phone stopped working altoghether. Furthermore, when I rebooted my phone it got stuck in a boot loop so I couldn't ever contact my colleagues at work nor tell them I arrived on site.

And finally, the same thing happened again but I managed to mitigate the disruption in a very, very ungodly manner and this happened just today. Luckily I could use my phone to call my mom and whoever was to be called today, but that was when I put my phone in safe mode.

Now that you know about all the phone's history, what does all of it lead to?

Decisions are to be made, and as of right now I'm looking forward into buying a new phone, more specifically the iPhone 11. I know, there are newer models but I just need a phone that works and that will work long-term, and I know damn well the iPhone is the perfect fit.

I also am considering other phones such as the Samsung Galaxy S22 which is in the same price range but I don't want another android phone because having lived with android phones for a lifetime I must say everyone is too quirky and all have their skeletons in the closet. For instance, Samsung tends to be really pushy with their ads, Xiaomi has beefy hardware paired with unoptimized software and so on.

But to be fair, Samsung is the only android phone I could ever trust again because from the Galaxy S10 onwards I have seen only improvements over improvements.

The criteria that is currently leading me to choose a phone is all listed below:

it is powerful enough to produce content on social media such as Instagram, tiktok, twitter and perhaps even facebook.

it has a good enough battery to last me a full day of work (i usually work shifts but you get what I mean, in case you didn't let me put it this way: it gets me through the day without a charger).

it has good enough cameras to take really good pictures and videos.

it has enough storage to store whatsapp, telegram, instagram and other chats.

it can call without having to pray for it to work.

I am not a man with a lot of demands but I sure need the basics covered. A compelling argument would be to be able to use 5G, but as it stands right now I don't even need 5G. I'm quite content on being able to access the internet without a computer. 5G is quite gimmicky and it doesn't work everywhere.

The next best thing I'm about to tell you is...

The next best thing I'm about to tell you is I'm actually giving it all I've got in the things that require all of my focus. I won't disclose what, since it is all personal to me, but just know that my conscience is telling me that I am indeed doing a good job.

One thing I can tell you is that I'm losing weight and my ex colleague showered me with compliments today because he saw that I shed some fat and now I'm slimmer. It's also thanks to my job that I am able to keep up with the weight loss.

What else can I tell you? This is already a long post, but this is a blog after all, so since you're reading this I might as well spill out every ounce of news I can.

Now, with all of this going on will I ever get the much coveted new computer?

To be quite honest with you, the computer became less of a priority for me right now because since my computer is still up and running and I'm not relying on it much as of right now, I can manage using this old laptop of mine. I have no qualms using an old computer as long as it is a working computer with Windows 10. This used to have Windows 11 but it proved to be too much for this 11 year old machine, so I downgraded.

The computer is to be bought when the funds and the circumstances are met. As of writing I don't really see a need for a computer, nor am I considering the idea of it because I'm always away from home and I do a lot of computer stuff on this old laptop that I personally repaired and saved from obsolescence. As for many other things I'm using a 9th gen iPad and it proves to be more than enough.

Conclusions

Dulcis in fundo, I have learned that I should nice things to not buy them twice.

Buy it nice, or buy it twice.

Honestly I don't remember from which Youtuber I got this quote from but he's absolutely right. My old Samsung Galaxy s10 is still going so strong after almost 6 years and is used by my mom for many, many things.

That quite concludes our little talk and I hope I can give more updates, either from a video perspective or maybe some other way. Cheers!

[addictedtostorytelling]

Hey! I'm in the camp that believes that GSR became an item around Grave Danger. While I love the idea of Committed being a possible starting point, I always liked the line of the characters being shaken up by Nick's kidnapping. Furthermore, I also liked the idea of Warrick's and Grissom's arcs being parallel in some way. While I may be forcing this a bit, and I know it wasn't likely a plan from the writers due to Doylists trappings, I always thought Grave Danger was a likely point perhaps because of Warrick talking avout how Nick's kidnapping changed his perspective (did I imagine that?). Outside of the Trigger lines provided in part 1, what indicators support a Committed start point? Have you ever considered a Grave Danger narrative?

Thanks!

hi, @malodets!

for me, the only real "hard lines in the sand" with the question of when grissom and sara actually get together are that i don't believe they could have done so at any point prior to episode 05x13 "nesting dolls" or at any point later than episode 06x05 "gum drops."

to my mind, episode 05x13 "nesting dolls" marks the earliest possible date when they could have gotten together, a) because grissom coming to sara's apartment serves as a kind of "crossing the threshold" moment for them, where once he passes through her door, they're back in the business of being part of each other's private lives again, for the first time in many years; and b) because sara telling grissom the secret of her family story removes a final interpersonal barrier from between them, creating a deeper level of intimacy than either one of them has ever experienced with another human being before (a notion which sara's comments to nora cross in reboot episode 01x04 "long pig" seemingly confirm).

likewise, episode 06x05 "gum drops" marks the latest possible date when i believe that grissom and sara could have gotten together, as "the big reveal" that grissom and sara were already sleeping together was originally planned to have taken place in that episode, and the timeline only changed after billy petersen became unavailable to film and the script had to be rewritten at the last minute, meaning that the writers were already conceiving of gsr as a couple by that point.

otherwise, within that window of mid-s5 to early s6, i think pretty much any potential "get-together" date is fair game.

—and certainly that would include a get-together date in the wake of the events of episodes 05x24 and 05x25 "grave danger" pts. i and ii.

like you say, there are some points that make a potential post-episodes 05x24 and 05x25 "grave danger" pts. i and ii get-together date an incredibly attractive prospect, including the idea that almost losing someone else he cared about might prompt grissom to draw closer to sara.

and you're right about warrick: in episode 06x01 "bodies in motion," he tells catherine that he decided to marry tina spur-of-the-moment after what happened to nick because life suddenly seemed "too short."

so if billy & jorja or one of the original showrunners were to come out tomorrow and say that the gsr get-together definitely, canonically happened following nick’s rescue, i wouldn’t be at all shocked or disappointed. it would make a lot of sense to me.

that said, it's not my personal favored date.

instead, i like to imagine that grissom and sara get together somewhat before episode 05x21 "committed"—specifically between the events of episodes 05x19 “4 x 4" and 05x20 “hollywood brass.”

more discussion on my reasoning after the “keep reading,” if you’re interested.

__

admittedly, a lot of the reason why i lean toward a date between episodes 05x19 "4 x 4" and 05x20 "hollywood brass" is just personal preference. 

to me, i like the idea of grissom and sara being together for more time rather than less, and i have a lot of fun watching the last six episodes of s5 imagining that grissom and sara are already together and reading their behavior in that context. 

it just feels like the right place for them to have become a couple, in terms of the narrative momentum, in my view.

that said, i do also have a few in-text reasons why i headcanon things that way, as well.

first off, i immediately rule out the events of episode 05x13 "nesting dolls," sara's suspension, and the first little while afterward as possible gsr get-together dates for a couple of reasons:

because within the universe of the show, episode 05x13 "nesting dolls" takes place on 02.03.05, which is a thursday, and in episode 08x02 "a la cart," sara says that she and grissom first get together on a sunday.

because i think that grissom wouldn't be comfortable hooking up with sara on the same night that she tells him all of her secrets because he would feel like she were too emotionally vulnerable and he wouldn't want to "take advantage." while they may (and, in my mind, likely do) engage in some kind of nonsexual intimate interaction even beyond the handhold that we see—such as, for example, grissom holding sara while she cries and/or kissing her forehead and/or tucking her in after she falls asleep on the couch—i don't think they sleep together then; that's just not what that night is about, imo.

i also don't believe they get together in the immediate aftermath of episode 05x13 "nesting dolls," either, as i think there's some evidence to imply that they are still feeling out a "new (more socially intimate) normal" between them once sara returns from her suspension, with their relationship status left somewhat ambiguous.

to me, sara's reaction to grissom's interactions with sofia in episode 05x14 "unbearable" especially seem to point toward her not being exactly certain of where she and grissom stand with each other. as i see things, were it the case that grissom and sara were already sleeping together, i think that sara would react differently to that situation.

along those same lines, i also don't think that grissom and sara get together at any point prior to episode 05x19 "4 x 4" because, as i see things, there are some textual cues which subtly suggest that they're not having sex in the several episodes leading up to that juncture:

in episode 05x16 "big middle," grissom is asked by regina owens at the hogs n' heifers convention if he has a girlfriend, and he says no but that he would like one. while it's possible that he could be lying (i.e., while it's possible that he and sara are already together, but for whatever reason, he doesn't want to tell regina owens that they are), i don't think there's any particularly compelling reason why he would do so in this case, considering that since regina owens is a complete stranger to him, there'd really be no danger in admitting to the truth, especially in a vague way that didn’t name names. though grissom is willing to lie by omission about his and sara's relationship once they are together in order to protect their jobs, even then, he typically avoids lying in any more active way if he can at all keep from doing so—it's one thing to simply never mention one's relationship at work and to allow one's coworkers to assume what they will based on a dearth of evidence, but it's another thing to feed them false information and/or purport to things that simply aren't true in a more explicit way, with full intent to deceive—so it'd be odd for him to take that tack here, in a relatively low-risk situation, and especially since he could have easily dodged the question had he wanted to otherwise. that so, i tend to take his answer at face value: i.e., i believe he's telling regina the truth, meaning that he and sara are not currently a couple, though he would like them to be sometime soon.

in episode 05x18 "spark of life," to me, sara's quip about the make-out spot (and grissom's "oh? you don't say?" quirked-eyebrow reaction to it) suggest that sara is fishing. that girl is not getting any, but she wants to be. badly. and she's not being subtle about it.

finally, grissom's reaction to overhearing sara and greg talking about their decontamination shower experience in episode 05x19 "4 x 4" to me suggests that grissom has probably never to that point himself had the opportunity to see sara naked but is very interested in doing so. (admittedly, i think it's also possible to interpret the scene through the lens of grissom and sara already being together at that point, as well, but, again, just as a matter of preference, i choose to believe that they're not.)

from there, the question of when they get together becomes an issue of calendaring and vibes.

in episode 08x02 "a la cart," sara tells ecklie that she and grissom first get together on a sunday.

episode 05x20 "hollywood brass" takes place on saturday 04.23.05 within the universe of the show.

episode 05x21 "committed" takes place on tuesday and wednesday 04.26.05-04.27.05 within the universe of the show.

episode 05x22 "weeping willows" takes place on thursday 04.28.05 within the universe of the show.

episode 05x23 "iced" takes place on friday 04.29.05 within the universe of the show.

episodes 05x24 and 05x25 "grave danger" pts. i and ii take place over tuesday and wednesday 05.17.05 and 05.18.05.

following that timeline, if sara's statement about her and grissom getting together on a sunday is accurate, then they couldn't have actually gotten together on the same days that any of those six episodes take place, meaning that the consummation had to have happened at some kind of in-between date.

—and that brings us to the vibes.

between the events of episode 05x13 "nesting dolls" and 05x19 "4 x 4," my read on grissom and sara is that they're both in "testing the waters" mode. after sara reveals her secrets to grissom, they both sense that there's been a sea change in the nature of their relationship. however, neither one of them is brave enough just yet to cross that final boundary line and initiate something physical between them. instead, they both drop "i'm game if you are" hints like crazy while continuing to build up the social/emotional side of their relationship, likely having more and more contact with each other outside of work over time.

what gets them to finally "take the leap" is, of course, a question that only fanfic can answer.

like i said, i tend to think the consummation happens between the events of episodes 05x19 "4 x 4" and 05x20 "hollywood brass," and i imagine a scenario where maybe there's a case that might be triggering for sara which prompts grissom to go check on her at her apartment after shift. turns out she's actually okay, though very touched by his thoughtfulness. one thing leads to another, and pretty soon, they've crossed that "event horizon."

of course, gsr being gsr, the fact that they've slept together doesn't necessarily mean that they've talked through the ins and outs of their new relationship status and/or confessed their feelings in full, so i don't doubt that there's still some kind of nebulous "what does this mean? where do we stand?" uncertainty hovering between them even after the deed is done.

even so, i do assume that from the events of episode 05x20 "hollywood brass" on, they are essentially a couple, even if they haven't put labels on things yet.

neither grissom nor sara features in episode 05x20 "hollywood brass," so we can't say for sure what their moods are like there.

however, picking up from episode 05x21 "committed," here's what we see:

in episode 05x21 "committed," sara is highly triggered by the case context and so is on edge throughout much of the investigation. however, there are a few moments of "sunshine" where she seems to perk up, all of them constellated around interactions with grissom (see, for example, the "i bet you aced your rorschach's" / "harpooned whale" scene, where she gets all smiley around him). she also is shown to draw a lot of comfort from grissom and confide in him about her feelings throughout the episode, building on what she told him about her past during episode 05x13 "nesting dolls." 

meanwhile, grissom demonstrates an intense awareness of sara's moods and is highly protective of her throughout the investigation, offering her an out from the case if she needs one. 

he also, of course, just about loses his goddamn mind when adam trent grabs her and presses the shiv to her neck. 

though of course nothing in the episode would absolutely prove that grissom and sara are together at this point and it is in fact highly possible to read this episode as a—or even the—“precipitating incident" rather than an example of something more “ex post facto,” i'm nevertheless inclined to view grissom and sara as already being a couple by the time these events are taking place. 

to me, there's just some of that new relationship, sussing-each-other-out stuff going on (e.g., grissom calling sara “baby” within earshot of sofia). plus, it's really easy to read notes of "oh my god. i just got her and now i'm losing her" into grissom's reaction when adam has sara locked in the nurses' station. 

moreover, i also think that the fact that sara seems to bounce back so quickly (to the point where she is able to finish the investigation without further signs of distress) after she is attacked may suggest that she and grissom are already together—i.e., that he has had the opportunity to comfort her in a more personal/private setting in the hours between when we last see them at the psychiatric jail ward that night and when they meet up with sofia to process the soundwaves from the pottery at the lab later that morning.

sara then features very sparsely in episode 05x22 "weeping willows"—just the one scene with catherine, where she talks about possibly getting hit on by a judge—though what little we see of her does seem to suggest that by this point, she has fully recovered from her recent trauma.

again, perhaps suggesting that grissom has shown her a little tlc since they finished up working the trent case.

however, grissom appears throughout the episode, and he seems to be in a mood, particularly where it concerns catherine “allowing” her personal life to complicate her investigation into adam novak. 

the way i read things, now that he and sara have been sleeping together for a couple of weeks, and especially in the aftermath of the events of episode 05x21 “committed,” where sara’s life was briefly in jeopardy, he’s starting to fully, unavoidably realize just how enmeshed the personal and professional spheres of his life have become. 

while he has no desire to back off from seeing sara, he is nevertheless reckoning with and reeling from the implications of their secret relationship. 

had she been seriously hurt by adam trent, grissom can only imagine what he might’ve done and how everything might’ve played out. 

his whole life has suddenly become a very precarious balancing act, and he’s keenly aware of the fact that it has, given what happened just a few hours previously at the mental hospital. 

that so, he ends up taking some of his frustration out on catherine, chiding her for “muddying the waters” between her private life and her work at the lab in a way that very much bespeaks his own anxieties. 

@bartramcat​ has written a brilliant meta explaining where grissom may be coming from in this episode with his criticisms of catherine’s actions, in light of his recent relationship with sara. 

to quote in part from it here: 

the terms he chides her with are quite interesting. upon learning about her interactions with adam novak, he tells her she has to recuse herself. then when she says she did nothing wrong: “we all live in glass houses, catherine. you gotta be careful where you take your shower.” the fact that grissom includes himself as living in a glass house, i.e., actually having a personal life that could be open to scrutiny, is perhaps telling. and the whole shower thing is downright strange coming from grissom. if i were catherine, i might have wondered when the last time he showered in someone else’s shower… although i think her first thought would have been lady heather, not sara sidle... at the end of the episode, [grissom] is still angry with [catherine]... he says: “i guess that’s why i don’t go out.” and, really, if he and sara have been sexually involved... at that point... then it’s true: he/they don’t go out. their relationship is the epitome of privacy, even after everyone knows about it 2 years later.  

i very much view this as a case of “methinks [the supervisor] doth protest too much,” where what grissom says to catherine has more to do with himself and his own situation with sara than it does with catherine, per se.

he’s wrestling with the fact that for the first time in his life, he has something that he’s willing to go “all in” for—something that could potentially complicate his safe, perfectly-ordered existence.

he’s already in so deep, and he knows he is.

but the strange thing—the scary thing—is that he finds himself weirdly okay with this level of commitment.

he knows in his heart of hearts that he’s willing to “go there” for sara.

he is willing to put everything on the line for her.

of course, the crucial detail here is that whereas in the past, this kind of epiphany might have scared him so much that he retreated from her (see his behavior toward her post-episode 04x12 “butterflied” in s4), by this point, he goes with it.

yes, he’s scared, and, no, he’s not about to shout their relationship from the rooftops and fuck up their work situation, but he’s also not about to go running off. 

he’s going to lean in, not out.

—which brings us to the events of episode 05x23 “iced” and the rest of s5.

honestly, to me, this is where i see the clearest evidence that grissom and sara are already together by the end of s5.

there is just such a lightness of being with them in this episode and at the beginning of episode 05x24 “grave danger” pt. i. 

they’re both practically glowing.

while ecklie’s incompetence in episode 05x23 “iced” might in the past have pissed grissom off, here, he’s able to just laugh at it.

also, he and sara cannot stop smiling—either at each other or at the people around them.

they both just seem upbeat, like they have some kind of happy secret.

they read like two twitter-pated fools in love, enjoying the halcyon days of their new relationship, both in their brief interactions at the dorms and in the aforementioned trigger the horse scene.  

up until the point of nick’s kidnapping itself, they both appear nothing but smitten.

of course, even after nick’s kidnapping, i also see potential evidence of their coupledom in how they behave during their moments of distress.

grissom seems to want to keep sara close while they work nick’s case.

meanwhile, as i talk about in this post,  

the interesting thing to me about how sara behaves in episodes 05x24 and 05x25 “grave danger” pts. i and ii is that for as much as we might expect to see her be one of the most openly emotional characters in dealing with nick’s abduction, she actually is fairly restrained. while she does get teary at a couple of points, she keeps her wits about her, her temper in check, and doesn’t ever fully break down and in fact is one of the calmer members of the team overall.

while outside of the universe of the show, we can attribute her relatively even keel in this scenario to the fact that she is simply not one of the episode’s focus characters—not in the same way that warrick, catherine, and grissom are—i do think there is actually an in-universe explanation for her comportment, as well, albeit one that we might have to read between the lines to find.

certainly it’s not the issue that she “cares less” than anyone else...

rather, it’s that she’s aware of what is needed from her.

looking around, she can see her other team members flailing, and she realizes she can’t afford to do the same.

in particular, i believe she’s aware more than anyone else of how much pressure grissom is under, and so she’s doing everything in her power to just be a reliable, efficient helper to him, doing what needs to be done so that he has one less thing to worry about.

part of my reason for saying so, admittedly, stems from my belief that by the events of episodes 05x24 and 05x25 “grave danger” pts. i and ii, grissom and sara are already a couple... and my sense that, accordingly, sara is perhaps more attuned to grissom’s moods than she has ever been.

#girlfriend mode activate

as for whether or not i see gsr getting together and warrick marrying tina as being parallel events, i personally don’t.

while i don’t doubt that nick’s abduction does have a profound effect on grissom, sara, and their relationship—in a very immediate sense, i imagine some needy lovemaking between them once they get home from visiting nick at the hospital that night—and may even precipitate some “next steps” for them (perhaps putting the idea of them moving in together into grissom’s head), i don’t really see much similitude between grissom and sara’s relationship and warrick and tina’s marriage elsewise, so i guess i’m not personally inclined to see it there, either.

like i said up front, obviously, i don’t have any concrete evidence to say that grissom and sara definitely do get together on such-and-such a date, and you have just as much ground to stand on favoring the later “grave danger”-centric date as i do the earlier pre-“committed” one.

my personal preference is just toward the earlier date, for the reasons i outline above; it just makes sense to me, and it’s the way i have the most fun interpreting the rest of the season.

thankfully, at this point, canon is definitely open enough to allow everyone to headcanon what makes them happy.  

thanks for the question! please feel welcome to send another any time.

[sylverstorms]

Lady Dimitrescu x Maiden ----Chivalry

It is late.

It is late, dammit! you repeat to yourself as you struggle to run through the healthy inches of white frost that cover the roads. The sky is grey, a clear indication it will snow again, but that is precisely what caused you to lose track of time so badly. And in this particular village, it is rumored staying out after sunfall is a fatal mistake.

Normally, you are not one to believe in such superstitions.

But nothing in this place you chose to call home is normal.

Though, to be fair to yourself, it isn’t much of a choice if it’s the only option left. Your family’s debts threatened to choke the life out of you after you lost your father –and you had to escape to the distant village of his birth. The same one he adamantly refused to talk about every time you asked, since childhood. Now you see why. You definitely see why.

The winter is ice cold. The summer –well, from what you’ve heard, that doesn’t really exist. Peerless, thick forests separate you completely from the outside world. The villagers range from highly superstitious to downright batshit crazy, which you guess –and hope— is from the isolation. That and the ‘incidents’. You choose to call them that so you don’t think of corpses and lose sleep at night.

The truth is… there are quite a lot of disappearances. An unsettling amount, if you’re honest. Still, there is a logical explanation besides the ‘werewolves and vampires and blood-witches’ nonsense you keep hearing about.

It baffles you why the villagers refuse to accept that it’s just the wolves. You’re surrounded by woods, for God’s sake and you hear them howling above the wind almost every night. They literally keep you awake sometimes. At the end of the day, though, they are just animals. Not supernatural monsters. Just good ol’ mother nature at her most brutal.

And in the off chance it isn’t, you don’t want to stay out long enough to find out.

Your steps hasten. It is a great relief when the sign of the shop near your house comes into view. Yes, almost made it! You cannot wait to have some warm soup and then curl into a ball underneath your heavy blankets.

Just as you are about to take the turn home, however, something catches your eye. Someone. Their presence is so jarring it makes you literally freeze in place and stare.

A woman you’ve never seen before –you’d know if you had, nothing about her is forgettable— ducks out of the store. Yes, she ducks, because she’s so incredibly tall there is no other way for her to fit through. Her height isn’t even the most stunning thing about her. Actually, you can’t decide what is.

It may be her spotless white dress and the way it hugs her luscious curves just right. It may be the wide-brimmed hat she wears, or the pearls that glimmer at her neck and ears, screaming of wealth. It may be her perfectly styled waves of dark hair and how stark they stand against the paleness of her skin. Or perhaps the ancient Greek, goddess-like beauty that is her profile.

You stand there breathless as she turns the other way, having spared you not a single glance. And why would she, when you’re a commoner and she looks like she has and is everything?

What is a woman like that doing here?  

She belongs in a palace guarded by knights, is your first thought. Then it clicks. She does, in fact, live in a palace. She must be the lady you hear the whole village whispering about, the one who owns the castle at the top of the mountain.

That… is such a hike from the village. How did she manage that in a dress and heels? And… wait. How isn’t she freezing to death? Even past your two layers of coats, you are shaking. The frost is biting. It’s biting hard.

You want to ask her if she’ll be alright on her own, but the first lesson you learned in the village is to mind your own business. People do not react well to kindness here.

So you make to follow your own path— only to halt again when a tiny shooting star of a shine slips down her back and falls into the snow. The lady doesn’t seem to notice. Curiosity killed the cat, they say, yet you walk forward to take a closer look.

An earring that looks more expensive than your entire wardrobe –and probably is— lies on the cold ground, lost and alone. You must be an idiot because it doesn’t even occur to you to sell it for a month’s worth of any meal you desire, until much, much later.

“Um— my lady!” you call out, before you can think twice about it. You don’t remember her name. What is the castle called? Oh, come on… Dimitrescu or something?

Thankfully, she stops and you don’t have to embarrass yourself further. When she turns, a cold breeze carries a wondrous, expensive perfume to your nostrils. Sandalwood, Chantilly musk. You are pinned in place by a pair of amber eyes that seem to positively glow from within. She’s terribly intimidating, even while she looks more amused than bothered by your delay.

You try not to stammer or stumble. “S-sorry to stall you. Your earring fell off.” you say over the pounding of your heart and the merciless chill. Your fingers are numb when you present the object to her like a tribute.

A gloved hand reaches up to her ear, slow, as if she’s in no hurry at all. “Ah.” she breathes. She even sounds as good as she looks. “How nice of you to return it, dear.”

That ‘dear’ shouldn’t make your mind glitch like a faulty machine so easily. You lament the fact your palm is so cold you can’t even feel the whisper of her glove against it as she takes her earring back. You stand so frozen underneath her towering height, her classy smell and studying, golden gaze for a moment you have all but forgotten the time.

A distant howl is quick to remind you.

Oh no!

Your instincts give an instant flight reaction, you want to make a dash for your house, but your blue eyes meet hers once more. The stunning lady either has a mean poker face or the sound doesn’t faze her at all. She seems to disregard it as blatantly as the cold.

“That— that’s not good.” So much for not stammering in front of the beautiful woman.

“Better hurry indoors, now.” she says it lightly, as if there’s an underlying joke in there somewhere. “Who knows what scary monsters a pretty dear like you may attract.”

A pretty— your brain shuts down and reboots on the spot. If the urge to run to safety wasn’t swelling so fast you’d have trouble speaking at all, after that. It is a small mercy your blood is too frozen in your veins to make your cheeks redden.

“But you… you’re not going back to your castle alone, right?” you ask. Surely, she’s not that crazy to trudge through the damn woods at this time. “S-shall I escort you to safety?”

The Lady blinks.

Then, she throws her head back in a brief, hearty laugh that tickles your ears in the best way.

“And they say chivalry is dead!” her voice sounds like whiskey. “You are too good for this village, darling, you really are.” as she says it, the very tip of her glove brushes over your cheek. A touch ghostly; quick to fade, though not from your skin. “Don’t you worry about me. Get indoors.” The last part sounds like an order.

You don’t have to be told twice.

You’re hesitant –why are you so worried about her?— but you step back with a nod. “Stay safe.” you say and dash towards your home without looking over your shoulder again.

The breath you’ve been keeping leaves you only after you’re safely inside with the doors and windows locked. The howling is getting closer. Louder. You can’t stop thinking about the woman –Lady Dimitrescu?— and hoping she sees the sunrise safe and sound.

Weirdly enough, nothing pads or scratches or makes noise around your house that night.

You fall into a deep sleep, dreaming of golden eyes and lips crimson like blood.

Ko-Fi

[shihalyfie]

Some fun talking about and analyzing the tri. stage play, and its relationship to Kizuna

The tri. stage play (full title: "Super Evolution Stage! Digimon Adventure tri. August 1st Adventure") is honestly quite an unusual entry in this franchise, even within Adventure standards. Nearly everything about its production is unusual -- the entire genre it's in is unexpected, the choice of time period to release something like this is unusual, and moreover, now that Kizuna’s out, a lot of people have noticed a lot of suspiciously similar themes and even language, most notably the key “we’ll always be together” line (phrased even exactly the same way in Japanese). In fact, despite ostensibly being a tri.-branded product, other than a few vague token nods to the anime series in the play itself, said stage play has very little to do with the actual anime sharing its name, so the similarity to Kizuna is even more striking in retrospect.

Perhaps another interesting thing about this play is that it’s a very good example of a standout work in the Adventure universe that didn’t have any original creator involvement (other than some minor tips from Seki). I think there’s often a tendency for people to think that in order for a sequel or spinoff to be true to the original, it has to have some member of original staff on there, especially since the Adventure (and 02) characters tend to be a bit overly complex and it helps to have the reassurance that someone who knows them is behind the wheel -- Kizuna used the presence of Seki and Yamatoya as an outright advertising point -- but this stage play’s director and writer had no experience with the franchise beforehand, not even as a fan, yet still made a very respectful product that has generally been received well by Adventure (and 02) fans and even got the original director’s approval, too. If anything, that makes it all the more impressive!

(Note that the below text spoils the story content of the play, but not Kizuna’s to any substantial degree.)

Some production background

Anime and video game stage tie-ins are fairly common -- much like this one, they tend to have very short runs and are targeted at a limited audience -- but they’re usually stereotyped as being for the otome crowd (i.e. predominantly female otaku audience), so works like this are generally associated with it. As a result, when this play was announced and released between tri. Parts 4 and 5, quite a few people were surprised, because this franchise originally came from products associated with shounen anime. In practice, this was a period where it was becoming increasingly clear that there was, in fact, a huge female audience for Digimon (especially Adventure universe), on top of the fact that (as noted by the performers in the final show) the audience for this show ended up being unusually mixed-gender, because Digimon really is universal -- but it did lead to the announcement of the play being initially received with heavy skepticism, partially because of the usual misogyny (stigma around things associated with female audiences, etc.), and partially because this was during a time where...well, saying that a very huge percentage of the fanbase, especially the Japanese side, was really pissed off at anything tri.-branded at the time is kind of an understatement. Ultimately, the play ended up very well-received with a small but dedicated following, and it’s currently referred to as “dejisute” (short for “Digimon Stage”) in Japanese fan shorthand. Bringing it up generally elicits positive critical feedback, even among those who were initially skeptical.

Some interesting things also surround the circumstances of its production as well. As some might know already, the tri. anime series and Kizuna share only one key member of staff: Kinoshita Yousuke, who was involved in tri. Parts 5 and 6, and eventually went on to become the producer for Kizuna and the upcoming 02-based movie. tri. was a work that (for some reason) had a huge number of producers on it, of which Kinoshita was only one; he seemed to have been replacing Arai Shuuhei, who left the project after Part 4. However, while Arai was formerly one of the most visible of tri.’s producers (he was the only one regularly brought up in interviews), how much degree of influence Kinoshita had with tri. is unknown, other than the fact he had no involvement in its story. Given that the decision to make Kizuna also seemed to have been made around Part 5, it seems that Kinoshita may have been brought on specifically for the purpose of observing and prepping for Kizuna, because his role on tri. seems to have been so minimal that the moment he was put in charge of Kizuna, the production philosophy ended up becoming completely different under his management. (When you think about it, tri. and Kizuna have very little in common, other than the rough premises of involving the older Adventure cast.)

The thing is, though, Part 5 isn’t actually the first tri. work Kinoshita is credited for, but this stage play is -- which is interesting to consider when taking into account the heavy amount of thematic parallels between this and Kizuna three years later, and in general the very unusual creative decision to make a stage play that suddenly popped up at exactly this time, making heavier tributes to Adventure (and even 02) than the actual anime it was branded with. Making things even more interesting was that the stage play’s director and writer, Tani Kenichi, was allegedly recruited by an unnamed producer impressed with his work (by the way, did I mention Kinoshita used to work in live-action before joining Toei?). Given all that, perhaps this stage play coming off unnervingly like a sort of Kizuna prototype isn’t all that surprising...

Unfortunately, right now we’re still kind of in a time period where official will get barraged with violently angry comments for even so much as putting the series on streaming services, so it’ll probably be a few more years (if ever) before official will be willing to be more open about what went on behind tri. production, and it’s probably a bit much to get too speculative about things like this when real people are involved. Nevertheless, one thing is apparent: the director and writer, Tani, was a newcomer to Digimon -- not even someone who’d been a fan beforehand -- but watched all of Adventure and 02 in preparation for it and stated openly that he was very, very emotionally touched by it. The work itself is obviously made with a lot of love and respect for the series, and one really cool thing about it is that you can also tell that it came from the perspective of an adult with no preconceived notions about it, therefore meaning it comes from someone analyzing the series without necessarily caving to fanbase mantras, and making some very cogent observations about the characters. It’s also just a fabulous work production-wise in general -- the puppet work and making the Digimon look convincing on stage is very well-done, especially when you consider that this play had only ten showings -- and you really gotta appreciate the fact that, even before Seki gave him a few pointers, he was so passionate about the importance of Digimon partners that he pushed for all eight to be represented despite the expenses.

Taking a look at the play itself

Despite ostensibly tying into the tri. anime series it's branded with, the play only really seems to loosely refer to some of its key elements as taking place at approximately the same time, such as Koushirou’s server, infected Digimon, setpieces like KNIFE OF DAY, and an eventual “reveal” that this seems to take place ostensibly around the rough time period of tri.’s Part 4. Look closely, however, and you’ll notice that a lot of things in the characterization and plot arena actually don’t track much with tri. at all -- for instance, in a very non-comprehensive list of things:

It’s implied that Yamato himself is embarrassed about the KNIFE OF DAY band name and is desperately trying to get through it with passion, which doesn’t quite line up with his attitude about it in the anime.

The timeline just really doesn’t line up; Mochizuki Meiko, Meicoomon, and the infections obviously exist, but you can’t have a time period in Part 4 where the kids recognize Meicoomon as being related to the distortions or infections while also being separated from Meiko. Moreover, the “reboot” just doesn’t seem to have happened at all (and to be fair, if you’re planning on making a two-hour tribute to Adventure, not having the Digimon with memories of said adventure would seriously limit the scope of your plot, so this kind of “leeway” was probably downright necessary).

The tri. anime series portrayed Takeru as having a very sharp shift in language, presumably under the implication he’s putting up a front as a flirtatious, aggressive playboy, and so his first-person pronoun was turned into the aggressive ore and his way of referring to Yamato aniki. In Adventure and 02, Takeru had used the polite boku and childish/cutesy onii-chan, and the boku was prominently used as a plot point to hint at Takeru’s identity as the series narrator. (Yes, these kinds of things are actually kind of a big deal in fiction.) Since even longtime fans generally agree that at some point Takeru would be likely to stop using onii-chan once he became old enough, the stage play likewise also prefers aniki over onii-chan, but, notably, it doesn’t even bother with ore in the slightest nor any of the implications that surround it, and Takeru comfortably uses boku for the entirety of the play. Considering that the use of aniki is still a bit unusual (both Diablomon Strikes Back and Kizuna prominently favor the slightly more polite nii-san instead), it seems that the play was made with an awareness that both aspects of Takeru’s language had changed, but a conscious decision to hold over only one from the anime.

And so on and so forth.

In general, the way you could describe this play’s handling of Adventure universe lore and characterization elements is that it’s a bit selective about which tri.-related elements it makes use of, particularly in regards to ones that might be too difficult to reconcile with the original Adventure (and 02). (This is basically the same attitude Kizuna roughly takes in regards to handling of tri. elements, although it’s less noticeable there partially because of the five-year gap between tri. and Kizuna.) Obviously, being completely incongruous with the tri. anime would be a pretty crude thing to do for a play that’s actually branded with it (and especially when said anime was still ongoing at the time, regardless of public opinion), but, regardless, the end result is that its actual relationship with the tri. anime’s version of canon is a bit tenuous.

The main reason for this is probably that, on the flip side, the stage play's references to Adventure -- as in, the specific series that aired in 1999-2000 and took place in the in-universe August 1 and 3, 1999 -- are incredibly aggressive. In fact, it’s actually far more aggressive in this respect than Kizuna is. For all Kizuna is branded as an Adventure movie and puts the original Adventure cast first and foremost in all of the advertising, if you watch the actual movie, in practice, it’s more of something that lies in the gap between Adventure and 02 and the two series together as a whole. Adventure was a series that practically revolved around a "trapped in another world" story and the specific impact its events had on the kids involved, but Kizuna focuses more on the “larger world”, including real world society (very much 02 things), with a lot of themes with suspicious pertinence to 02 and references to its epilogue looming over the plot; the specific Adventure references and even the Digital World don’t come into play until the climax. (And that’s before we get into the fact that the 02 quartet gets more screentime than a good chunk of their seniors.) Really, you can see it just by the fact that a majority of the primary key visuals line the 02 quartet up with everyone else; it’s a movie about both, not just Adventure.

So in other words, Kizuna is really about mixing Adventure and 02 elements, serving as a sort of stopgap work, and recasting the Adventure group in a lot of 02′s context. (And that’s by no means a bad thing; since Adventure wasn’t about that, the differing juxtaposition is a fresh perspective in its own way.) But in terms of revisiting what the actual series called Digimon Adventure was and how those events might have an influence on its relevant cast years later, this play (which actually has longer runtime than Kizuna, being around two hours) is a good place to go to if that’s what you’re looking for. The entire premise of the play revolves around copiously referencing that specific adventure back in 1999, and, more importantly, what impact it’s still continuing to have in this particular group’s memories, to the point where they’re starting to romanticize it and wish they could return to it forever...

Ah, right, that’s what this play has in common with Kizuna: the overall theme of unhealthy fixation on rose-colored nostalgia, and the need to move forward from it. (And, driving it home, “unhealthy fixation on the events of Adventure” as a symbol of that rose-colored nostalgia, to boot.)

The premise of the play itself is that the kids decide to hold a camping trip as tribute to the adventure in 1999, as part of a desire to "go back to those times" (and, as is eventually revealed, it’s actually part of a pocket universe their subconscious wishes had dreamed up as a desire to recreate the past, thanks to the power of the Digital World). So all of the references to Adventure are concrete and fleshed out in specific detail, ranging from everyone referencing specific events and how they impacted them (Jou very explicitly refers to his experiences in Adventure episodes 46-47 in terms of why it fuels his current desire to become a doctor) to even the most minor of references (direct reference to bananas on File Island, from Adventure episode 3).

As a brief aside, a positive side effect of centering the plot on this specific adventure is that it justifies the reason for why these eight are working together (at least prior to the endgame reveal that they’re still involved in tri.’s events); the eight of them weren’t portrayed as liable to do so without good reason, and while certain aspects and events from 02 are alluded to when they’re relevant, the absence of the actual quartet passing without note is completely justifiable because they simply were not on that adventure anyway. (They weren’t initially planned to be at the event in 02 episode 17, and knowing them, it’s likely they wouldn’t want to be at this kind of outright commemorative camping event, because they’d feel like they’d be intrusive in something they had nothing to do with.) So within the scope of the play in two hours, the narrative can be very neatly condensed to be mostly about Adventure itself.

Although this play and Kizuna both share the common theme of the existential crisis that comes with getting older and the tendency to romanticize one’s childhood, the underlying reasons are a bit different; Kizuna’s is very close to 02 in that it’s largely to do with societal pressures and expectations, especially since the question of "what you want to do with your career" is a driving motivation in it. In other words, the existential crisis comes from living up to other people’s expectations, or trying to fit into an arbitrary societal mold of an “adult” without necessarily knowing if that’s what you really want. In the case of this stage play, being set in everyone’s high school years where everyone’s relationship to “the world at large” is a bit more tenuous, the reason for the existential crisis is somewhat closer to Adventure’s: everyone’s started to think they might have been better people back then. More confident, less hesitant, more honest with their feelings. Adventure was a series about self-improvement and one’s relationship with oneself, so it’s understandable that a work meant to look back on that specific adventure will ask the question “well, did they become better people after all?” as a result.

But there’s two problems with this line of thinking: one, this is a very rose-colored evaluation of their former selves, because just because they might have been “more confident” back then doesn’t mean they didn’t have other problems going on (Hikari calls her past self out for being arguably “more honest”, but also somewhat of a dependent child), and two, being more hesitant doesn’t make one a weaker person, just one who’s dealing with a lot more problems and awareness and things to worry about because of how much the scope of their lives has increased. As Agumon says at the end, the old Taichi and the current Taichi are still the same person; it’s just that he’s dealing with more, so he’ll naturally worry about more, and taking on those extra burdens is actually his own way of “evolving”.

Particularly interesting is the position of Jou, the not-so-unsung hero of this story, who is explicitly identified as the person most clearly aware of his future dreams and proceeding without hesitation towards them, to the point of being somewhat immune to the effects of the dream world. (Somewhat, mainly because the ending establishes that he wasn’t entirely.) It's consistent in line with the fact that we actually saw, directly, the train of thought that led to his decision to become a doctor back in Adventure, and he even states it directly in this play himself: he doesn’t consider himself someone who wants to solve things through fighting, but rather someone who can prevent casualties and heal the injured if he pursues this line of study, and thus is determined to make it happen. Even from the very early points of the play, there are several hints at him being able to see a metaphorical “future” that the others cannot, and while he remains unfailingly loyal to his friends (there’s a long sequence of him constantly claiming he’ll leave them as per Koushirou’s request but constantly coming back because he just can’t bring himself to abandon them), he also is the first one to depart the camping trip to attend to a test -- that is to say, he treasures his past, but he has a strong enough dream for his future that he’s willing to move on better than the others can.

Jou’s also the one to personally advise Yamato about the difference in nuance between doing things because you feel you must, versus doing it because you yourself truly want to, a difference in nuance that also becomes very pertinent in Kizuna. Also pertinent to both works in common is the discussion of nuances between “staying trapped in one’s memories” and “violently cutting them all away” (the consequences of the latter being more extensively discussed in Kizuna), versus the ideal situation of reflecting on those memories and experiences from the past in order to productively move forward.

And in the end, rose-colored nostalgia is, indeed, rose-colored nostalgia. Because, sure, that adventure back in the day was great, and they grew a lot, but they also grew a lot because they were overcoming some very harsh, difficult troubles; omitting those parts is losing the substance. The re-invocation of the fun “camping trip” also means re-invoking all of the other things that came along with it, including all of the dangerous threats they’d faced back then. It’s a package deal, and you can’t just filter those out, because it misses the point of what you gained out of it in the first place.

In general, the character writing for this play is also very good; there are some differences between the characters here and them back in 02, but they’re all within the believable scope of positive progression within three years and general adherence to core tenets of their character (Koushirou is certainly more assertive, but emphasis continues to be placed on his deference to others, penchant for spotting details, and capability for being an organizational leader in his own sense). Also notably, this play manages to verbalize a lot of the subtleties in Adventure and 02 that the mainstream tends to gloss over (and don’t tend to get put in official profiles) but are well-known to those deeply familiar with the series. This is the kind of attention to detail usually associated with those who have been studying the series for years, so it’s refreshing to see these come out in words -- for instance, Koushirou stating outright that he was one of the closest people to Taichi for a long time (very true!), Hikari and Takeru actually commenting on each other from back in Adventure (something we never really got in 02, despite “them having known each other for a while” being part of their character arcs), and Sora explicitly admitting that she goes out of her way for others because it’s easier to work for others than it is to even think about herself.

Actually, the attention to detail in general is fantastic; other than a minor slip-up (Sora refers to having met Koushirou during the summer camp at the beginning of the play when she’d actually known him prior from the soccer club, a detail that’s very easy to miss because it’s only mentioned once in Adventure episode 16 and clarified further in the novels), a lot of things from Adventure and 02 are made use of and framed in very clever context; the choice of Etemon as the enemy for this play is well-placed for both his entertainment value and the fact that, as an enemy personally defeated by MetalGreymon in Adventure episode 20, it makes perfect sense that he would have a grudge against Taichi in particular. (It’s also explicitly mentioned that Hikari and Tailmon never met Etemon in person even once, and that Taichi never actually got to see MetalEtemon, so there’s a lot of attention paid to logistics like that.)

Also, while 02 is not really brought up within the scope of the story (and really shouldn’t be, not when this story so heavily centers around Adventure and its themes), its place in canon and its contributions to the worldbuilding are fully respected; a lot of the offhand references to family situations and background are elements that were originally introduced in 02, and many aspects of its Digital World lore are used to assist the plot premise (in particular, the idea of the Digital World being connected to something that can conjure up unconscious dreams wasn’t explicitly invoked until 02). Rather amusingly, at one point, Hikari uses the events of 02 episode 13 to tell a “scary story” to troll Mimi, and it’s interesting and rather refreshing to see the implication that Hikari’s been able to move past the incident enough to use it to troll someone else. There are also some latent epilogue references as well, with Hikari directly bringing up her goal of becoming a kindergarten teacher, Takeru making some really subtle references to wanting to be a novelist and chronicle their adventures (in true Takeru fashion, he never states it outright, but anyone familiar with the epilogue can figure it out), and Taichi alluding to an ultimate goal of humans coexisting alongside Digimon.

Finally, attention should be called to the play’s relationship writing in general. As stated before, the play does call attention to relationships between characters that often don’t get brought up by the mainstream but are somewhat more well-known to fans -- Koushirou and Taichi, Sora and Mimi, Jou and Yamato -- but even the well-known ones are treated with nuance endemic to that from Adventure and especially 02, given that Taichi and Yamato don’t actually have the stereotypical “cold rivals” atmosphere that shounen anime would usually suggest, and the two of them have an extended heart-to-heart in which Yamato actively tries to figure out what’s wrong with Taichi and treat him kindly. (Like in Adventure, the only time they break out in a fight is when Yamato gets emotionally compromised and starts worrying that Taichi isn’t doing enough for others’ welfare.) It’s also very consistent with how the two treat each other in Kizuna as well (the izakaya scene comes to mind, and has a lot of similarities to the awkward-but-ultimately-close conversation they have at night in this play).

And, of course, the centerpiece of the narrative overall: the human-partner relationship. Of course, a lot of this was probably helped by Seki lecturing Tani to not mess this part up, but it really is impressive to consider in light of the fact we’re working with a lot of puppets that have handlers clearly in plain view, so you have to have some massive suspension of disbelief to make this work. But not only are the movements well-done to make it convincing that you really are seeing these actors physically interacting with their partners on stage, the narrative also puts huge spotlights on them, making the Digimon outright be the ones to snap their partners out of their worst patterns of thinking (especially with Agumon and Taichi), and dedicating a long period of silence where literal stage spotlights are dedicated to each kid having some alone time with their partner. The intimacy is very convincing, and, truly, Tani’s insistence on making sure every single one of the main Digimon was represented in spite of the prohibitive budget paid off very well. The point is made: a Digimon partner has to be someone who knows you well and intimately and can call you out at your worst moments, and Taichi even spells it out: Agumon’s capable of seeing right through him.

Putting it next to Kizuna -- a movie dedicated entirely to examining the meaning of a partner relationship, what happens when it deteriorates, what that means for oneself, and what it takes to recover it again -- it’s perhaps unsurprising that this play ends on the same line that was used in all of Kizuna’s advertising and was central to its own plot: “We’ll always be together.”

[britesparc]

Weekend Top Ten #497

Top Ten PC Games No One Talks About Anymore

Blimey, Quake is rather good, isn’t it? Have you heard about it? I really hope so, because it’s only twenty-five years old. I mean, Jesus. What’s up with that? Quake is meant to be the future. It’s full of true-3D polygonal texture-mapping and real-time dynamic light-sourcing. Fancy it being a quarter of a century old. That’s ridiculous. “Old” is for things like, I dunno, Space Invaders or The Godfather or I Wanna Hold Your Hand. Stuff that our parents heard about before we were born. It’s not – it’s absolutely not – used to describe something that people bought 3D accelerator cards for. It’s not used to describe a game that popularised online gaming.

But old it is, getting silver anniversary cards and everything. No longer the angry, hungry young tiger, devouring its ancestors and growling at upstart rivals like Duke Nukem 3D – sure, you’ve got non-linear levels, interactive scenery, and toilet humour, but we’ve got grenades that bounce with real physics – Quake is now an aged beast of the forest, resplendent, battle-scarred, weary with gravitas. Quake is the game that shaped the now, but it does not represent the future anymore. In fact, arguably its greatest rival – Unreal – is the game with the lasting, living legacy, its progeny building the next generation of gaming with one of the most popular and impressive engines around, the framework underpinning everything from Gears to Jedi to Fortnite. Quake blew us all away, but arguably it ceded the conflict, secure in its status as one of the most important and influential games of all time. Quake II got plaudits for actually having a proper story and an engrossing single-player campaign (and coloured lighting!), and its immediate descendants such as Half-Life changed the nature of what FPS games could do, but in a funny way it feels like Quake has long since retired. A sleeping titan. It got old.

So it’s great that they rereleased it on modern systems! The version of Quake released last month is basically the game I remember, but tarted up a little around the edges, with texture filtering and dynamic shadows and other stuff that I couldn’t manage on my Pentium 75 back in the day. It plays great – it’s slick as anything, and you go tearing round the levels like a Ferrari with a nail gun, blasting dudes and ducking back around a corner before you get hit with a pineapple in the face. It’s the first game I’ve played in a long, long time that evokes the feel of classic PC first-person shooters of that era – which, y’know, kinda makes sense as it is a first-person shooter of that era. But that style of fast-paced run-and-gun, circle-strafing gameplay has gone out of fashion now, with FPS games usually favouring slow, methodical, tactical combat, or larger-scale open-world warfare usually involving vehicles. Whether it’s a straight-up no-frills blaster like Quake, or a game that takes you on more of a linear, narrative journey, like Quake II, or even just a multiplayer-focused arena shooter, like Quake III Arena, it does feel like a dying artform, like a style of gameplay that could do with a resurgence (and, to be fair, there are games on the horizon that look like they’re harking back to the era, so that’s cool).

But it’s not just first-person shooters like Quake that I feel have slipped from gaming’s shared consciousness. Maybe it’s my age (it’s definitely my age) but there seems to be quite a lot of games that were a big deal twenty or so years ago that are utterly forgotten now, whereas some – Doom, Duke Nukem, Command & Conquer, Age of Empires – are often namechecked or rebooted (even before the full-on 2016 reboot, Doom must have been one of the most re-released games of the last thirty years). But there are lots of others where sometimes I feel like I’m the only one that remembers it. And that’s where this list comes in: inspired by the excellent re-release of the Quake franchise, here are some other great PC games of that general era that I feel still need shouting about, even if I’m the only one doing the shouting. Maybe they don’t all need a full-on remaster or whatever, but it’d still be nice if they got a bit of modern gaming love.

No One Lives Forever (2000): coming at a time when most FPS games were still Doom-style blasters with little in the way of real plot, NOLF was different: stylish and funny, genuinely well-written (as in the dialogue), with interesting objective-based missions and a cool female protagonist. It skirted similar ground to Bond and the then-white-hot Austin Powers franchise. Two games were made and then, as far as I’m aware, it evaporated into a mess of tangled rights, hence no sequels or remakes. A shame, because it was great.

MDK (1997): the next game from the people who made the multimedia phenomenon that was Earthworm Jim, MDK was a really cool slice of sci-fi style, all sleek level design and intriguing features. It had a supremely bonkers plot which bled through into a game with a sense of humour, but mostly it was the run-and-gun gameplay and innovative use of a scoped weapon – possibly (don’t quote me on this) the first sniper rifle in a videogame. An even wackier sequel followed, but despite its cult status, that was it.

Star Trek: The Next Generation – Klingon Honor Guard (1998): it’s probably fair to say that Star Trek has not had as many great videogames as Star Wars, perhaps because Trek’s historically straightlaced earnestness just didn’t translate as well as bashing someone up the chops with a laser sword. Honor Guard shook things up by casting you as a Klingon, showering levels with pink blood and going Full Worf. It was the first game to licence the Unreal engine, and had a cool level where you walked along the outside of a ship like in First Contact. Also: shout out to the Voyager game, Elite Force (2000), which was another really good FPS set in the world of Trek, with intriguing gameplay wrinkles as you fought the Borg. It also let you wander round the titular starship between levels. Trek deserves more quality action games like these.

Earth 2150 (2000): the nineties on PC really saw RTS games come down to those who liked Command & Conquer or those who liked Warcraft, but as the decade drew to a close other titles chased the wargame crown (including Total Annihilation, which would have made this list, except I feel like the Supreme Commander franchise is a sequel in all but name). 2150 was notable for its Starcraft-like mix of three factions with contrasting play styles, and its use of 3D graphics and the ability to design and build weapons of war that could lay waste to armies and bases with spectacular results. I think the genre has ossified into something more hardcore, and this was probably an inflex point where idiots like me could still get a handle on things.

Midtown Madness (1999): Microsoft has a history of building up great racing franchises and then abandoning them, but their “Madness” line of games in the late nineties/early noughties was terrific and much-missed. Back when tooling round actual 3D cities was still new and exciting, this was a no-holds-barred arcade racer, with some gorgeous shiny chrome effects on the cars, and very nippy handling. It was great fun smashing up VW Beetles and the like. It was surpassed, I guess, by Project Gotham on the Xbox, and sadly the whole franchise was then forgotten, despite the ascendent Forza franchise mostly shunning city driving.

Commandos: Behind Enemy Lines (1998): part tactical war game, part puzzler, Commandos was famous for its gorgeously intricate graphics and its difficulty – I mean, it was way too hard for me. But its beautiful top-down design and its slow, methodical gameplay was compelling, as you evaded Nazis and solved missions with a team of unique units with special skills. Sequels followed, and western spin-off Desperados, but there’s not been a true follow-up for quite some time, despite promises; and few games have echoed its style or look.

The Pandora Directive (1996): okay, so really this is just a placeholder for an entire subgenre of game that appears to have been forgotten: interactive movies. I know, there are flirtations with this from time to time; and many of these games featured obtuse puzzles and relatively little gameplay strung between FMV scenes. Pandora was great though; a first-person 3D game with loads of old-school adventure aspects, as well as FMV, it was a noir-tinged detective story but set in the future. The Tex Murphy series (of which this was the fourth instalment) has had sequels – the most recent one was sadly cancelled only this year – but many other games of a similar ilk, such as Phantasmagoria and even Wing Commander – have fallen by the wayside. With in-engine graphics now allowing the fluidity and expression of cinematic renders of old, shooting movie inserts doesn’t seem like it’s worthwhile; but I still always loved a point-and-click game that featured digitised actors milling about. Toonstruck, anyone?

Marathon (1994): before Halo there was… Marathon! Back when I used to lug my Pentium round my mate’s house so we could play different games on different machines side-by-side, he’d bang on about this Mac-first series of games, like Doom but better, with an intricate plot and complex levels. And y’know what? He was actually onto something. There’s a style and an earnestness to the Marathon franchise, along with many concepts that would be refined in Halo years later. With Bungie now seemingly committed to Destiny, and Halo in Microsoft’s hands, I’m not sure what could possibly become of this, their forgotten FPS forebear, especially as it shares so much DNA with its offspring.  

Outlaws (1997): LucasArts are famous for two things, really: their Star Wars games and their adventures. But they made loads of other stuff too – including this intriguing Western shoot-em-up. Back when Western games were rarer than Western movies (which were rare at the time), this quirky and difficult cowboy-em-up saw you rounding up outlaws in typical oater locations such as saloons, trains, and mines. It had great music and a really intriguing set of weapons, including (don’t quote me on this) the first sniper rifle in a game. Sadly Outlaws’ success could be described as “cult” and it never got a proper sequel. and, weirdly, despite the success of Red Dead Redemption, we’ve never had a bit Western-themed FPS again. Which is really odd.

Soldier of Fortune (2000): I pondered whether to include this one, as if I’m honest I’m not sure I want this licence brought back. But I can’t deny the game was a huge deal and has seemingly been forgotten. A relatively gritty and realistic combat game with a huge variety of excellent real-world weaponry, its big hook was its incredibly detailed damage modelling, that could see you blowing limbs off enemies, or splitting open heads, or disembowelling them. Whilst its OTT violence made headlines, the granularity of its systems meant you could be more tactical, shooting weapons out of hands. But really its biggest controversy should be its association with a big old gun magazine.

There are many, many other games that nearly made the list - I almost had a Top Ten of just FPS games, for instance. Little Big Adventure was here, till a sequel was announced the other day. Hexen and Heretic I think still have a place in FPS history. Toonstruck, although without a sequel, was only really a cult hit at the time, and I feel the people who’d love it already know about it. I do tend to overthink these things, y’know.

So maybe not all of these could make a comeback, but all the same I don’t think they should be forgotten, and it does make we wonder what games will fall by the wayside twenty or more years from now. That game about the big green space marine dude in a mask – what was that called again…?

[fabdante]

Ok, last one. The Kat and Artemisia post. Incase you missed them, this is part of a trio of posts on Baroque art and the DmC reboot trio and a separate post on the DmC reboot and the Baroque as an art movement.

The other posts if you want to check them out: Dante and Caravaggio, Vergil and Benini, DmC and the Baroque

Today for the final installment in this little mini series, we’ll be discussing the artist who won the Baroque, Artemisia Gentileschi, and her painting Judith Slaying Holofernes, featured below. 

Analysis of this painting, why it’s such a bop, Kat, and the devil may cry reboot below the cut!

Content Warning: discussion of abuse as it relates to Kat.

I guess we start with the beginning and the beginning is who Judith is. 

Judith is a biblical character. Upon impending invasion, she is unsatisfied with the response of her people and decides to infiltrate the enemy camp with her maid, intent to stop the enemy army. After gaining the trust of the people there, she eventually seduces general Holofernes and is invited to his tent. Then she beheads him with what I am left to assume is his sword. I suppose given the painting that part’s a little spoiled. 

A lot of paintings focus on the beheading or Judith posing with the decapitated head in victory. But a lot of them don’t have the impact of Artemisias, as seen above. 

Judith, as painted by Artemisia, is full of rage. She is not serene or delicate. She is not posing or unsure. She is angry, certain, and out for blood. Everything in her expression and her movements is full of force and intent. It’s the little details like his hair between her knuckles from where she’s gripping it and the forceful twist of her wrist on his sword that she’s taken. To her rolled sleeves in her incredibly fancy dress. And it’s not afraid to be gory to. Perhaps this is tame by modern standards of blood and gore but for the time it’s very bloody and violent. Supposedly the violence was too much for the first owner who kept it hidden for some time (allegedly). I think it’s important that while the focus is Judith doing the act, her maid is not passive in the violence. She’s holding him down with just as much force as Judith. And unwavering to, despite how we can see how Holofernes was trying to throw her off before he died, his hands still limply in the air. The maids full of as much determination as Judith is. Judith’s dressed up for this to, in a fine gown with her hair done up. This is likely part of the ruse Judith set up before she got Holofernes alone, but I like the detail none the less. That she’s dressed up for this murder.

The key to why this painting fits Kat so much to me is how it is not only full of anger and femininity and violence but how in Artemisias hands, the image feels like a bloody catharsis. There’s something personal in Judith's glare, in her rage. Something kind of interesting to in how she’s forced Holofernes to look away from her, like he hasn’t earned the right to see her victory even if by this point he is surely dead (I mean, the sword is nearly through his neck). Or like she doesn’t want to look at him at all, like he’s not worth looking at.

Likewise, for Kat, hunting demons is personal. The Order is personal. Why she’s here doing this is personal.

It’s personal because Kat killed her abusive foster father. I don’t think how impressive this is truly gets conveyed. It’s almost a throw away statement. It’s just that one line, ‘I killed the bastard’, and that’s that. Like it was easy or something. In the reboot universe, though, she’s not even in the same dimension as her foster father. We don’t get a lot of information about how much a demons human form impacts their demon form. We are told Mundus is fused to his human form, but we’re also told this is because he’s been in it so long and also there’s the matter of his relationship to the hell gate. We’re not even told how long he’s been in this form. Has it been years, decades, centuries? How long is so long that it led to this fusion? So, I don’t think we can base the average demon to this. As far as we know in canon, it’s Kat against a being in another dimension. A dimension she cannot engage with physically and to which he can escape to at any time. 

And yet she kills him anyway.

She is the only human we know of in canon who’s done this, to. To be fair, she is the only human mentioned at all in the reboot canon but by how Dante positions himself as human savior and by how certain Vergil seems to be that humans cannot take care of themselves, this must be rare.

I cannot express enough how important it is that Kat is the one who kills him to. It’s not Vergil. She doesn’t say it was Vergil. It’s also not her and Vergil, she doesn’t say that either, she doesn’t say ‘we killed the bastard’. Kat says explicitly that she killed him, ‘I killed the bastard’. It’s Kats kill. No matter how much Vergil helped her, she did it. She killed her abuser despite the odds against her. 

I can’t imagine the sort of catharsis Kat must have felt in that moment. We don’t know how she killed him, she never says. The greatest crime of the comics, in my opinion, are how they take this kill away from Kat and give it to Vergil instead. Which means no further elaboration there on what went down. But I can imagine her in that moment after, unsure how to feel with the rush of adrenaline and power and newfound safety. She’s done it. She’s done something she must have thought was impossible. And she tells us in game how this made her feel emboldened to handle the rest of demon kind. She doesn’t tell us in that many words, I suppose, but she says that she wants to deal with them all because she killed her foster father.

To Kat, this is personal. To Kat, mankind is something worth saving that she is willing to do everything to save. We don’t see her violence in game, but we know she’s willing to kill for this freedom. We know she’s willing to die for it to, given the aftermath of the Orders fall. It’s personal. And Kat sees it as something far bigger then her.

Often Kat I think is written off as someone who is naïve and weak and in need of saving. I’ve complained at length how I feel about her being called naïve. In game we see a very interesting, complex person in Kat I think. I’ve said before that it’s kind of fun to just watch her in scenes. Like really watch her. She has very deliberate body language that often betrays this calm she’s fighting to display, particularly around Dante for the first half of the game or so. It’s little things like how she physically contains herself after the ‘I like it rough’ comment, shutting her eyes and taking in a deep breath, but things that are there. She’s someone who, despite everything, is fighting to be a softer, kinder person even if she’s still got a lot of anger (Vergil does compare her and Dante, after all).

And being soft and kind does not make someone weak. Existing in a world where you are at a disadvantage to the things that aim to hurt you is not weak. Entering into your enemies tent armed with nothing but an elaborate gown and your anger, waiting until you spot a sword and an opportunity is not weak either.

I think something about Kat that is so often forgotten in the drama of the twins and everything else (because lets face it, no matter the media, female characters tend to get side lined for...everything else really), is without her the twins would have failed. It’s Kat who gets Dante and safely brings him to the Order. It’s Kat’s spells that bridge the human world to Limbo. It’s Kat who saves Vergil in the server room by way of bringing Dante to him. It’s Kat who ultimately gives the twins the final plan to get to Mundus. It was her. Dante says so at the end, to. The game recognizes that without Kat, the boys have nothing. And it's still Kat at the end who saves Vergil, and saves Dante from the guilt of killing him.

With Kat taking so much into her own hands despite her disadvantage, despite just being human, despite her softness, despite this rage boiling under her skin (or perhaps because of it), she is so much of why the world is free from demons. 

I mean Artemisia herself got that treatment, largely left out of artistic canon until very recently despite her success during her time. I also debated for a very, very long time across the many, many iteration of this essay on how much I talk about Artemisia’s personal life. I suppose if you made it this far you’ve seen that I’ve chosen not to, despite how it could be relevant to this discussion. But I think her work stands on it’s own without me having to justify the anger Artemisia may have personally felt and conveyed here without bringing up her personal life in depth. Though, if you want to know, I assure you that pretty much any information you look up on Artemisia will go into detail on her personal traumas and how that might impact her work. And it could definitely be relevant angle in discussing Kat and Artemisia, I just felt it overall did not add to this essay.

I often wonder, if she was in a different game or a different medium or a different story, if Kat might get more love. So often she’s called weak for the crime of not having a big weapon and a trail of dead demons behind her. So often she’s reduced to a love interest or a damsel despite how she is really the thing that saved the day, despite the fact her relationship with both twins is much more then ‘potential love interest’. And how many times have you  guys seen a post on your dash about wishing a character picked to enact revenge on an abuser? How they fought to be soft despite their trauma and pain? But I suppose, as is often the case with women in any story, she might have gotten this treatment anyway.

So, here’s to Kat. The brain cell, the Nephilim baby sitter, the girl who wanted to throw Vergil off a cliff, the hero Limbo city got who will never get enough credit, and forever the girl who deserved more. 

Those of us who love you will love you enough for the whole fandom, it’s alright.

[firstagent]

Since it popped up on the Podcast, how would you rank the sibling dynamics from healthy to trainwreck?

This is an innocent-sounding question until you go over the franchise and realize just how many sibling relationships there are in Digimon and that all but like three of them have elements that might raise eyebrows. In the interest of being comprehensive, this includes all named characters in any anime, manga, and game I’m familiar with, treating the reboot separately and including Survive because... (looks at Kaito and Miu’s bios) ...holy crap.

Sibling Relationship Rankings! (Healthy is Higher)

Joe & Shin Kido (Adventure): Shin understands Joe’s hang-ups and offers support to make his own choices without steering him in any specific direction, for or against the family. And Shuu exists too (depending on the language you’re watching in)

Juri & Masahiko Kato (Tamers): For all of the awkwardness and potential points of fracture in the family, Juri and Masahiko are very close. Fun Fact: She started carrying around her iconic hand puppet to amuse and entertain him!

Keito & Nozomi Tamada (Re:Arise): Even with very different personalities, Keito and Nozomi have a lot of respect for each other. Unlike some big brothers, he comes to a mature conclusion when he realizes she’ll be just fine with Pumpmon at her side.

Yamato Ishida & Takeru Takaishi (Adventure 2020): Yamato’s worry over Takeru only affects his reluctance to take on time-consuming side quests when he might be in danger. Far more chill about trusting Takeru with the rest of the team, he’s a motivation rather than a mental handicap.

Masaru & Chika Daimon (Savers): Perhaps a more controversial pick for the healthier side, but Masaru and Chika have a playful relationship that proves that Chika dishes out as much as anyone in the family. Given how much harm DATS and Digimon have done to the family, Masaru risks her love to keep them away from her.

Joe & Shin Kido (Adventure 2020): Shin’s still supportive and still encourages Joe to make choices for himself, but having that bugout bag ready to go raises some serious questions about that family and which side Shin’s really on.

Ai & Makoto (Tamers): Toddlers fight. It’s okay. They come together for Impmon’s sake and the fact that they’re the only duo in the franchise with mutual custody over a digivice has to say something about the strength of their relationship.

Nene & Kotone Amano (Xros Wars Manga): Nene’s tactics are still desperate but not quite as extreme as the anime, and it counts for so much that Kotone fights so hard for Nene once the tables are turned. And good lord that backstory...

Takuya & Shinya Kanbara (Frontier): There’s definitely a sense of Takuya lapsing into thinking Shinya encapsulates everything frustrating about having an older brother, but he gets over it.

Miyako Inoue + Three (Zero Two): Perfectly normal large household. And while wondering what it would be like to be an only child is something every youngest does... top of mind fantasy, Miyako? Really?

Jianliang & Shaochung Lee (Tamers): Speaking of four-packs... there’s no doubting how much they care about each other, but Jian’s occasional short fuse with Shaochung betrays his usual calm demeanor, and we never get a picture of the full family dynamic once Rinchei and Jaarin are included.

Daisuke & Jun Motomiya (Zero Two): Everyone likes to paint Jun and Daisuke as something uglier than it really is. As much as they annoy each other, it’s still a pretty conventional sibling dynamic and they’d still fight hard for the other... even if the feeling’s closer to obligation.

Koji Minamoto & Koichi Kimura (Frontier): There’s no questioning the bond they develop, but there’s no way Koji and Koichi go from “don’t know the other exists” to “ZOMG Twinzies!” without a ton of awkwardness and feeling each other out. They’ll get better, but from our standpoint this is where we start to drift into trainwreck territory.

Tomoki & Yutaka Himi (Frontier): Tomoki can spin it all he wants but Yutaka comes off as a real jerk. Not that some resentment isn’t a little justified given how much Tomoki is coddled, but taking it upon himself to be the bearer of tough love is still not cool.

Taichi & Hikari Yagami (Adventure 2020): Hikari has a blind faith that Taichi can save the day in any circumstance, up to and including international shipping crisis. Meanwhile Taichi sees Hikari lapsing between typical friendly eight year old to brainwashed robot and doesn’t find any problem with it.

Yamato Ishida & Takeru Takaishi (Adventure): Lessons in how not to be an overprotective big brother. Yamato freaks out at the slightest notion that Takeru might be exposed to danger, including his very presence in the Digital World. When you have a complete nervous breakdown realizing that little bro’s actually pretty capable on his own, it’s not about your relationship with him anymore.

Touma & Relena Norstein (Savers): There’s caring about a little sister, making her plight a central cause in your life, and then involving her in a chess match with a madman. There’s a lot to forgive here (they are raised in a family where your kneejerk reaction to Grandma is “I bet she supported the Nazis in World War II”), but everything about their relationship just makes you uncomfortable.

Kaito & Miu Shinonome (Survive): Maybe it’s not fair since their game is the franchise’s unicorn, but their bios have warning flags all over it. He’s overprotective, ready to fight at the slightest hardship, and she repays this attitude by being rebellious and weird and eager to pursue trouble. May end up being worse once the game actually comes out.

Rei & Hajime Katsura (Appmon): Another one where their backstory makes you sympathize with the lengths they go to in order to stay together, but risking the security of actual guardians to go it alone? Jesus. Even with their ride or die attitude, you still sense a bit of friction in their relationship, and so many of their hardships are their own doing. 

Nene & Yuu Amano (Xros Wars): There’s nothing seemingly wrong on the surface between Nene and Yuu, but that’s why their actions are so extreme. Yuu’s more than happy to treat her as an enemy general in his game, while Nene’s aligning herself with dark forces and causing real trouble to get him back. It’s all very loud and intense for a relationship that, without external influences, is just nice and cordial.

Yuuko & Yuugo Kamishiro (Cyber Sleuth): You can be anything you want on the internet! So why not take the identify of your big brother who was stricken with a mystery illness at a young age and lead a legion of hackers? And if you’re Yuugo, use your digital body to take control of that avatar! Nothing weird about any of this!

Ken & Osamu Ichijouji (Zero Two): Like Tomoki, Ken can come up with whatever rationale for Osamu’s abuse he wants, and Osamu at least had some kind moments, but there’s no denying that this family was a mess. And of course Ken’s reaction to Osamu’s death... could have been better.

Taichi & Hikari Yagami (Adventure): Hikari’s introduction to the series was intended to be a little creepy, and that just sets the tone. Her blind loyalty to Taichi is a primary point of emphasis through three series, and Taichi sometimes goes ballistic worrying about her... when not accidentally endangering her life. And that’s before she unleashes a world-destroying abomination at the mere suggestion that Taichi’s dead, and why telling him “what you’re doing is wrong and I kind of hate you for it” is a big moment for her, even though she’s wrong.

Neo & Rei Saiba (V-Tamer): There’s going a little overboard to keep your family together or save a sibling’s life, and then there’s aligning yourself with evil forces to avoid having to deal with your sister’s manageable disability. Call it being jaded or delusional, but when it drives your sister to attempt suicide there are definitely issues you two need to work through.

Erika & Ryuji Mishima (Cyber Sleuth Hackers Memory): Because aligning oneself with Arkadimon is always a fantastic idea. He’s overprotective, she manipulates him because of it, there’s resentment, there’s anger, and basically the entire game is spent watching these two outdo each other in terms of causing wanton destruction throughout the city and cyberspace.

Honorable Mention: Bagramon & DarkKnightmon (Xros Wars): The battle of who can stab the other in the back last.

Want to support my site and/or my work? Buy me a coffee!

[davidmann95]

JJ Abrams Superman Movie officially announced, with Ta-Nahisi Coates writing

Anonymous said: Just a few days after you said you were happy with DC taking a break from Superman movies and just focusing on him being on tv again, they go and announce a new Superman movie. How do you feel? Coates is an exciting choice, I think

Caught me red-handed! But to be fair a couple times I said that I left a caveat of ‘barring extraordinary circumstances’, which I’d say this qualifies as.

There’s only so much to go off of at this point, but even these tidbits open up a lot to think about.

* As out of left field as Coates feels at first blush - he’s a Marvel man! - it’s not entirely shocking that he’d be on WB’s shortlist to be their ‘how to fix Superman’ guy: he got a MacArthur Genius Grant the same year as his #1 bestselling book about what the American Way actually means, after which he got into superhero writing with a run that ended up having elements incorporated into a cultural moment in Black Panther, and then Between The World And Me was cited as the inspiration for the Watchmen show that substantially drew on Superman iconography and won 11 Emmys. People are already talking about him admittedly not being a DC or Superman guy (though in that same interview he notes his love for the DCAU, specifically including STAS), but if he’s here he’s got something to say and, y’know, probably read a decent amount of Superman stuff either since then/prior to this or to get ready for the gig, so can’t say I’m worried.

* Related note: I’m seeing folks concerned about how much control he’ll really have over the project, which is fair. But that it’s his involvement that’s being touted over JJ Abrams’ (the guy who, like him or not, rebirthed Star Wars as a going concern to the tune of over $2 billion), and that they’re formally announcing and hyping it up as TA-NEHISI COATES’ SUPERMAN MOVIE™, COMING 202X before even having a director or lead actor attached, says to me that whatever his vision is it’s one WB’s going all-in on for the time being.

* I’ve seen plenty of discussion already about the appropriateness of this potentially starring a black Superman given both the dynamics/thematics of Superman as a character, and more significantly the implications of Coates maybe only being brought onboard to do ‘the black version’. That is a conversation I have precisely zero qualifications to wade in on with my own takes, but given that he is a dude with enough options that he could probably even turn down an opportunity on this scale, and the aforementioned weight being given to his role in this, I think it’s safe to say whatever we’re going to get is something he’s onboard with.

* Also seen concerns re: his pedigree as a fiction writer - another one I’m not that qualified to weigh in on, I’ve only read the first year or so of his Black Panther and Captain America runs (though I got the rest of his BP on Comixology while it was free, gotta check it out sometime), which were solid if a bit more workmanlike than you’d hope, along with the (other category altogether) Between The World And Me some time ago, which was...considerably more than solid. I know however his fiction novel debut in The Water Dancer was well-received, his Marvel work rather than staying ‘grounded’ hasn’t shied away from the sort of outré high concepts you’d want to see in a Superman movie, and the main criticism of his runs of ‘they’re too slow’ wouldn’t likely have the space to apply in a 2-3 hour Hollywood blockbuster, so again, not too concerned.

* Perhaps time will make me eat my words, but hot take: there is a basically 0% chance this is about Calvin Ellis or Val-Zod. Yes, yes, the DC movies are reportedly embracing the multiverse an excuse to do standalone stuff, but the two examples of that thus far in Joker and The Batman are still broadly rooted in the conventional trappings of those characters even if they’re separated from the ‘main universe’. Maybe someday the options might go further afield, but right now, when Superman hasn’t had an unambiguous silver screen hit in over 40 years? They’re not going to pour a quarter-billion dollars into a movie with the premise of “last son of the doomed planet Krypton, imbued beneath Earth’s yellow sun with powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal men and raised with the noblest ideals of truth and justice, Some Other Guy Most Of You Don’t Know protects the world...as Superman!” Not even getting into Val-Zod being just one member of an ensemble cast from a largely overlooked book and having the baggage of being Zod’s kid, and the EVERYTHING of making a four-quadrant tentpole film about Super-Obama (when you haven’t even been able to make your regular Super work) - this is either going to be Clark, or if they do make Superman black or brown but still want some distance it’ll be a Jon movie so it’s still got the direct connection to the original and the ‘son of Superman’ pitch in its corner too.

* Abrams is an interesting partner. He’s Hollywood’s big nostalgia guy, and that’s...probably not what Coates is going to be going for here. I assume he’s basically there to keep things familiar enough for WB’s tastes, which itself raises questions about the nature of Coates’ pitch and how it was internally received even if they’re clearly very publicly committed to it.

* Michael B. Jordan probably won’t really be the guy - he apparently talked about it, reasonably concluded he didn’t want to face that inevitable scale of backlash after what he already went through just playing the Human Torch, and the tradition is to cast an unknown in the part - but I guess never say never. Heck, while I sure wouldn’t bet on it I don’t think Ryan Coogler ending up involved is out of the question either; Coates’ previous screenwriting experience was working on a project with Coogler and Jordan that evidently didn’t come to fruition (Wrong Answer, a drama about a 2006 Atlanta public school cheating scandal), and they seem to have maintained a relationship as they had a public discussion regarding The Water Dancer in 2019.

* Ok I know making fun of Snyder people is passé at this point and usually more “NO SUPERMAN MOVIES MAY BE PERMITTED UNTIL THE CIVILIZATION-REDEFINING FIVE-FILM SAGA IS COMPLETE” howling into the void is barely worth notice, and “this is solely WB retaliating against us for bending them to our will!” in response to a Superman reboot would normally be just an amusing side-note too. But trying to get #HenryCavillSuperman/#HenryCavillIsOurSuperman trending in response to the possibility of a black Superman...I mean obviously so fucking many of them are fully aware they’re just not saying the quiet part loud, but what’re the percentages here?

So that’s what I’ve got so far. How do I feel about it all? It’s odd; given that there are basically no actual details beyond a name attached I’d never thought about in this context, and that this came with no forewarning just as the prospect of Superman in movies for the next long while seemed as dead as it ever had been, it’s so ill-defined and seems so unreal that I don’t feel much of anything about it yet? Plus I’m no longer driven on a day-by-day basis by a savage, all-consuming desire to slake a thirst for quality Superman stuff long left unquenched the way I was even a couple years ago, which likely also plays its part. But objectively? This is a guy formally, nationally recognized for being smart who’s also a journalist and comics fan being given Superman, with what sure feels like a lot of leeway and presumably a blank slate, which is basically the abstract concept of a perfect pick. So yes: I formally rescind my “please no Superman movies in the 2020s” plea.

[fizzingwizard]

Ok so episode 42 is really fun! I was trying to decide if it’s a big improvement on episode 41, which had higher stakes but didn’t make me feel much for Yamato or Takeru.

This episode - I feel like I ought to be less thrilled with it because, in spite of taking Taichi along, he’s just support and doesn’t have much to do say or do. Which is a pet peeve of mine - when there’s a lot of characters I get that not everyone can have equal screen time in every episode, but when there’s only two they need to either interact with each other a fair bit or have separate tasks that matter equally. I think it’s just lazy writing to do otherwise.

However, I’m not feeling that way as much as usual with this episode, because it just did such a good job with Koushirou and the Digimon guest star. in terms of emotional impact, episode 41 with its story of brotherly bonding seems like it should be a sure winner, but I think the way Koushirou connects with Garbagemon this episode was surprisingly more compelling.

There’s also the animation as well - episode 41 had better animation quality overall, but episode 42 had wonderful background art, wonderful storyboarding, great lighting, and great music accompaniment. It’s the same music as always but I felt that they laid it in better than usual. So while the character art was a bit choppy, the rest more than made up for it.

My one complaint WOULD be that - yeah, Taichi didn’t need to be there. In fact, the episode might have been better without him, because it would have set up Koushirou and Garbagemon even more up closely. I was hoping to see Taishiro friendship strengthen this episode (we do see them working together at least). I don’t mind that it was Koushirou’s episode instead, but I do think they needed to get rid of Taichi somehow.

I’ve yammered on longer than usual above the cut so let’s get to the actual review!

^A kid who was an absolute star this episode

More below!

So the episode is set in a junkyard. Smelly? Sure. Great ambience? Absolutely xD

Taichi and Koushirou are on their scouting mission from last week... though just what they’re scouting for is kind of vague. Personally I think they’re both just curious explorer types and can’t help themselves, they have to go on adventures, they hate just sitting around lol

They meet Garbagemon, who in spite of being gross is a lot more palatable than his 99 incarnation. Garbagemon explains that he’s a scientist who analyzes the garbage that falls from the human world into the digital world. There’s a cute running joke in which he insists it’s not garbage, but “materials,” and then the instant Taichi points to something Garbagemon says “Oh, that one is garbage though” lol.

Taichi: *gasp* Cup ramen!

Agumon: *drooling* Can we eat it can we can we??

Koushirou, aka Party Pooper: Guys, it’s expired (duh)

Taichi and Agumon: Awww...... :’<

I love little moments like these. Taichi... maybe it’s worth him being in this episode just to see him get all excited over the idea of eating expired cup ramen... xD

Garbagemon then tries to take Koushirou’s tablet computer to “analyze” but Koushirou stops him. Garbagemon then invites them to come see his lab.

Koushirou: Lab?? A real scientist’s real lab?? Really real scientist’s really real lab really go see for real????

Garbagemon: Cool your jets weirdo...

Yeah, Koushirou’s excited. IT’S AWESOME. He instantly bonds with Garbagemon over their mutual love for scientific analysis lol. He found a kindred spirit. Koushirou is always at his best when he’s overflowing with the joy of discovery. Garbagemon as well seems happy to talk to someone who gets it, even if he’s less exuberant lol.

Taichi has not a lot to say, but if he were to talk, it’d probably just be jokes and poking fun so I guess nothing was really lost there.

Meanwhile, tunneling his way through the heaps of trash... MY DARLING RAREMON

Seriously this is one of my all-time favorite Digimon. I love him. He’s so gross. I remember being 8 and seeing Grimer and Muk in Pokemon and not feeling a thing. Then a while later I saw Raremon in Digimon Adventure and was like WHOOOOA COOOOOOOOL!!! Yeah, Digimon turned me off Pokemon lightning fast xD (I still liked Pokemon but I pretty much ceased to pay attention to it.) The episode in 99 where Koushirou fights Raremon was one of my favorite episodes of that series, so I was super happy to see a nod to that in the reboot.

Garbagemon makes Taichi and Koushirou drive his cart back to his lab like the pack mules they are lol.

Koushirou finds this flash drive amid the garbage in the cart and Garbagemon says he can have it. We don’t deal with it again in the episode (unless... I missed it...?) so maybe it’ll come up again soon.

Their journey is stalled by the appearance of Raremon The Beautiful! Just look at that gorgeous face.

Raremon: Grarrrr?

Taichi and Koushirou quickly get to work. Their partners evolve and fight back and it’s pretty disgusting. I loved this little moment where Garbagemon is all impressed by the way the humans help the Digimon to evolve. Taichi’s focused on the battle, but Koushirou notices and appreciates Garbagemon’s interest. Of course, later he has to stop him from trying to “analyze” his digivice as well lol

WHAT IS IT WITH THIS SHOW AND ATTACKING DIGIMON IN THE MOUTH??? It’s officially A Thing! XD It happens aaaaall the time! Lmao I’m sure it’s probably meant to be connected to how Digimon gain energy by eating other Digimon in this season... something like that but in reverse... it’s just so weird haha

So here’s an example of a scene with storyboarding I really liked. This bit in Garbagemon’s lab uses so unusual angles and I can’t really put into words why it changes how I feel but it does... perhaps it’s just that I enjoy seeing things done a bit differently.

But I think there’s something more too - in the scene, Garbagemon explains that he used to have a whole team of Chuumon who helped him with his research, but Raremon ate them all except for the one who’s left. It’s a pretty tragic story. Garbagemon is an interesting character: if he were human, he’d definitely be some wizened, Einstein-haired, bent over old man whose cares and troubles are worn into his face. Idk how I get that impression from a garbage Digimon but that’s what good writing and voice acting can do!

So, for Koushirou and Taichi, they’re being let into Garbagemon’s world and it’s not one they can entirely related to, yet their hearts go out to him. I feel like the unusual angles reflect both that attempt to connect and the distance between them.

This was my absolutely favorite: this peek through the shelves at their little huddle as they talk about the weapon Garbagemon’s been making to defeat Raremon. We are kept distant, yet our focus is zeroed in on the group. THIS IS SOME AWESOMESAUCE CINEMATIC GENIUS Y’ALL lol

The group goes to find Raremon and we get a REALLY EPIC moment from Koushirou: as they’re flying into battle, he reflects on why Garbagemon is fighting, and this is what he thinks:

“Revenge... It's not a good thing, but there's surely a pain there that only the one left behind can understand. For humans and Digimon...”

It’s such a grown up bit of reflection that we just haven’t had much of this season. I think the character who’s connected the most with other Digimon is Mimi, but thinking isn’t her style - she’s all emotion and action. Koushirou is probably the only one we’ve seen so far really reach out with both heart and mind like this. And it’s absolutely intentional and important - at least I believe so. This is Koushirou, who other kids may have a hard time understanding, because he’s always caught up in his own thoughts. It may be easy to think of him as someone who doesn’t value emotions, but that’s not true: he is introspective and doesn’t put his every thought out into the world. He’s also probably the type who values privacy, his own and others.

I think there’s very likely something here that’s meant to hint at Koushirou’s own personal pain as well. We don’t know what it is yet, but the last time it was mentioned was in the human world, from which we can pretty much assume it’s something to do with his home life. It may or may not be the same situation as in 99 Adventure. We’ll have to see. But I think it played a part in Koushirou’s ability to empathize with Garbagemon in this episode.

And what’s more - thinking about revenge, at ten years old, and not taking a black and white position, in a show about kids for kids - I mean, that kind of not talking down to kids style was one reason I loved 99 Adventure, and this is the same sort of thing. It’s a grown up thought. It’s Koushirou understanding the world more fully. And we really have not seen much of that this season, so it’s encouraging that we’re even getting this bit now. The show has been black and white good vs evil in a lot of ways, but only on the surface: first Taichi connected with Ogremon, then we were pretty much told that Devimon’s actions were not entirely his own sane decision, and then SkullKnightmon turned out to be a part of Tailmon in some way.

So the show is definitely trying to be more interesting than good vs evil. I really don’t know why it took so long to get here, but I’m glad it has at last.

Then Garbagemon jumps into a borderline suicidal attempt to shoot his bazooka at Raremon, and succeeds at freezing him into an ice sculpture. But the black lightning starts to shoot into Raremon, making his eyes glow red... very creepy... buhahaha...

That is one hell of an evolution scene, lol

Taichi: I don’t think even YOU look that cool when you evolve

Greymon: Sorry for not having the charm of a MUCK monster

Raremon evolve to... Rareraremon!!!

XD That name cracks me up buhahahah

Rareraremon is a gross as you might expect - reminds me somewhat of beast form Envy in Full Metal Alchemist actually. Not as scary though.

From this point, the episode does go down a predictable path. Inspired by Garbagemon’s resourecfulness and still very much empathizing with him, Koushirou concocts a plan that takes advantage of the oil in Rareraremon.

He gathers some garbage, er, materials - namely this product for hardening oil (like on frying pans etc) so you can scrape it off and put in the garbage, since oil should never be poured down the drain. These packets were also shown earlier in the episode so it’s basically a “eureka” moment for Koushirou

He gives them to Taichi who goes around throwing the packets into Rareraremon’s body, which instantly absorbs them. Idk why he carries his Digivice in the basket too?? that was odd??

Glug glug glug... in 2021 we beat baddies using SCIENCE!!!!

From here I’m not 100% sure about everything in the plan because the audio cut in and out. But AtlurKabuterimon spins Rareraremon around and meanwhile Koushirou has created some device to channel MetalGreymon’s power... I don’t really understand why that was necessary but maybe it was explained in a part where I didn’t have audio.

Taichi: Uh, Koushirou, you sure it’s safe to be sitting there?

Koushirou: What about you? You always ride MetalGreymon while he fights

Taichi: yeah but I don’t sit on HIS GUN

Obligatory best boy pic even if you were very much the third wheel in this episode dear hahahahaha

He attac!!

This causes the heated oil in Rareraremon to freeze fast and he turns into a hardened mass of oil... very ugly... bad way to die lol

For some reason every reboot episode ends with a sunset *shrug* it pretty I guess

While thanking them for their help, Garbagemon’s friend Chuumon suddenly evolves into Searchmon. That was pretty cool. It happens right after Koushirou shakes Garbagemon’s hand so it seems like it was his influence that helped it along.

I’m really surprised by how much I ended up liking freaking Garbagemon lmao

Ugggghhh Taichi you may have been a pointless addition but I’m still always happy just to see your face

So in sum - in case you can’t tell, I really liked this episode! I still hope for actual Taichi & Koushirou interactions in the future... but I just can’t care about that lack this time because it was such a good Koushirou episode. I’ve droned on a lot now and y’all are probably bored to tears so I’m gonna wrap it up. 8/10!!!

Next week:

freaking Etemon loooool

Looks like it’ll be an amusing episode for the most part. As much as I’m enjoying these lighter, character-building moments - I hope we don’t ignore the main plot for too long. The pacing of this season has been WEIRD AF so I just never feel safe :P But I absolutely do not want to go back to the kind of episodes we were getting in the past that were “plot” episodes but mainly just battles with nobody characters and no character moments... no thank you! I will happily watch the kids make fun of Etemon, thank you very much.

posted unedited as always

[vintagedaydreams]

TLNRS Mini Reboot Take 2

               Here is the second one! Hope you enjoy it? Again, not edited, nor proofread, so it may suck, you’ve been warned, enter at your own risk, etc.

@kettnerjanea @katsav17 @imyourapocalypse @bethanymccauley @whirlpoolsink @rasberryfon-fon

                 Volterra, Italy. A walled city in the middle of Italy, you know, the country that's on the opposite continent of America? Yes, that Volterra, Italy. A place you'd never been to in your life.

               And yet, here you were. With the Cullen family and your mate. Your mate that you didn't know was your mate and who you actually thought was already happily mated to another. Another vampire. Your mate, Carlisle and Esme, his apparent not-mate vampire friend.

               Can you say homewrecker? Ever since you found out that Carlisle was your mate and not Esme's, (the woman who had treated you like another daughter since the day Bella dragged your human self over to their house), you'd been practicing that word. Homewrecker. Homewrecker. Homewrecker.

               Carlisle was a great guy...er, vampire, and let’s be honest, he was not only gorgeous, but kind, compassionate, caring, sweet, gentle, remember mentioning gorgeous?, but, he'd been taken! And quite happily for quite some time.

               Then you walk in, unprepared and unawares and suddenly, BAM!, no more 'I love you, Esme'. Did you ever feel like a heel, or what?

               To make matters worse, assuming they could get worse, you all had been summoned to Volterra. For multiple reasons. Apparently you and Bella being human still was something of a problem and because Carlisle and Esme had marked each other as mates, even though they weren't "true mates", Carlisle was going to be punished. Supposedly, since you were his mate yet he'd marked another and been marked in return, you were the one slighted.

               Quite frankly, you felt as if you should be the one getting punished. You'd just destroyed his and Esme's relationship that they'd had for like...decades!

               What if you didn't want to be the horrible human being who tore people apart?

               A gentle hand on your elbow startled you out of your thoughts and you turned to see Carlisle, looking down at you in concern.

               "There is nothing for you to be worried about, Y/N," he said quietly, with a small smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. You'd seen a lot of that recently. The mating pull, as Edward had explained to you, was in effect, making Carlisle super protective, possessive and worried about you.

               Which was pretty much a dream come true. Who didn’t want a handsome, sensitive, intelligent and caring man fawning over and providing for them?

               But you could see that he wasn't happy about it. He was no longer quite the care-free doctor you’d first met. Now, there was more of a stoop to his shoulders and it weighed heavy on your own heart to know that your mate wasn't content with you. That your mate was actually miserable being with you.

               Apparently this 'mating pull' went both ways. Which was super.

               The doors before you were suddenly opened and you were all beckoned into the throne room. You walked in beside Carlisle with Esme, Edward and Bella directly behind. You would rather have been just about anywhere other than here under these circumstances.

               Maybe you could just die? Cue mental snort. Okay, so that sounded a bit melodramatic. But...everything would go back to normal then, right? Esme, (whom you'd briefly started to think of as another mother), would get Carlisle back and Carlisle...well, he didn't seem too sold on this whole, 'You’re his mate' thing, so it probably wouldn't be that hard for him to bounce back. Bella would understand since she'd already tried dying multiple times for her loved ones and the rest of the Cullen family weren't incredibly happy with you for stealing their dad away from their mom.... This could work. 'Course, you'd have to make sure Carlisle wouldn't get punished again, but if you made it look like an accident and not that you’d actually died because of this whole mating thing, then he couldn't get into any trouble for it!

               You started to think of all the ways it could happen. Your family hadn't spoken to you since you moved to Forks almost four months ago, so they'd be fine. Stuff like this happens all the time. Well, not the whole 'suicide so your mate and his family can be happy like they were before you showed up', but accidents did happen all the time...

               A low noise brought you out of your thoughts and you looked around, a bit startled at the...growl?...that you could hear. Glancing over at Carlisle, you saw him looking back at Edward in confusion and worry.

               Curiosity peaked, you also turned to look at Eddie and your eyes widened in surprise. He was the one growling and he was....glaring at you? With a dangerous glint to his coal black eyes. You could've sworn they were gold when everyone stepped off the plane. His hunger couldn't be that severe- it’s not like half an hour would suddenly make him ravenous. Besides, all the veggie vamps fed before they boarded the jet to Italy.

               So what the hell was his problem?

               "Edward?" Carlisle asked quietly, his hand once again taking residence on your elbow. Pulling gently, the golden eyed doctor drew your closer to him.

               You had to will yourself not to melt into him. He was only doing this because of the mating pull. He really loved Esme, not you. And soon, he'd be free to love her again.

               Edward's growling suddenly grew louder.

               Your eyes widened and all the blood rushed from your face. Well shit. This whole mind reading thing was a serious pain the ass.

               Putting on your own scowl and matching glare, you turned further to face Edward.

               "Would you get out of my head already?" you demanded. And preferably not tell anyone what you heard since it's really none of your bloody business in the first place, you continued mentally.

               Bella was lucky she had some sort of mental block; what happened to privacy and common decency?!

               "Edward?" Carlisle asked again and when Edward didn't answer, only kept growling, Carlisle turned to you. "Y/N? What's the matter?"

               You turned away from Edward and back to the thrones in front of your procession where the three Volturi kings were seated and staring at you. Really. Floor, just open up and swallow you now.

               "Nothing," you muttered to the doctor. "Eddie just needs to learn personal boundaries." The Carlisle you had met before he'd realized the mating pull would've still been concerned, but dropped the subject since you obviously didn't want to talk about it.

               This new Carlisle who was forced to play dutiful mate, frowned and drew you into his side tighter before asking, "What were you thinking to make him growl like this?"

               You tensed and gave the poor guy a fake, sweet smile.  “If I wanted any of you to know, I wouldn't have thought it, I would've said it out loud."

               You internally winced at how…bitchy that sounded, how cold, but you had to distance yourself and fast. This was the first time that Carlisle had really initiated any sort of contact, especially any type of comfort and it was really starting to mess with you.

                You’d always been drawn to Carlisle, from the beginning, and this forced possessive and protective side to him was beginning to wear you down. If you weren’t careful, you really would be a homewrecker. Right now, you were trying your hardest to respect his wishes and not fall prey to the Pull. But as soon as you let it get to you, you would truly be the monster they all thought you were.

               All you wanted was for him to be happy. Even if it wasn't with you.

               Edward's growls suddenly died off and you gave a small smile, thinking he'd finally seen reason with your line of thinking and this was over.

               Boy, were you wrong.

               Aro had cleared his throat, focusing the attention on him.

               "A very spirited mate you have there, dear friend," was the first thing out of the vampire king's mouth. Carlisle gave a small smile. That once again was a shadow of his former smiles.

               "Thank you, Aro. She will certainly keep me on my toes."

               You mentally snorted again. Sure. But not for much longer.

               Aro suddenly stood and glided down to the group, stopping a few feet away. "My dear friend, I regret having to do this particular ceremony with you, but as is part of our laws and customs, it must be done."

               Carlisle inclined his head. "I understand, Aro. And I appreciate your sentiments on the matter."

               You felt your throat start to close up at the thought of Carlisle's punishment, whatever it would be, just because he marked and was marked in return by the women he loves. How was that fair?

               Your attention was suddenly diverted back to Aro as he took a few steps forward to stand in front of you.

               "My dear, if you would step up next to me?" he asked, holding out a hand. You'd heard about Aro's gift and mentally cursed. Great. All your ideas that you hadn't even finished yet, would be heard by yet another mind reader. But maybe there was a way to block certain thoughts? Edward had told Bella and yourself that Aro could hear every thought you'd ever had. Past tense. So maybe if you continued thinking your plans, they wouldn't be able to be seen...?

               It was worth a try. Not like it would hurt anything. If it failed, well, he would be able to see anything either way.

               So, with a deep breath, and more low growls from Edward, you stepped forward, placing your hand in Aro's.

               Surprisingly gentle, the vampire king pulled your away from the half of the Cullen coven and up towards the thrones. You had made it to the base of the stairs leading up to the other two kings when Aro suddenly stopped dead in his tracks, (no pun intended), and swiftly turned to stare at you.

               Because that wasn’t intimidating at all.

               Judging by the now tense atmosphere in the room, apparently this wasn't part of the normal proceedings.

               "Brother?" one of the kings, Marcus perhaps?, asked in a quiet voice. Still staring unblinking at you, Aro didn't answer for a moment.

               "Aro?" Carlisle asked, worry prominent in his voice. You tried to smother the wince that crossed your face, couldn’t you do anything right?, but judging by Aro's suddenly sharper gaze, you were pretty sure you failed. Apparently, he'd also read all your thoughts from just a little while ago, so change that fail to an Epic Fail.

               When did your life turn into this? Who did you piss off in a past life to deserve this?

               "Brother," Aro suddenly asked, seeming to snap out of his stupor and continuing you both up the stairs to his throne, "what do their lines look like?"

               Nobody in the room needed to have 'their' clarified and everyone waited with baited breath to see what Marcus would discover.

               Seeming to zone out for a few moments, Marcus' eyes suddenly refocused and he answered, "They are strong, brother. But not as strong as other true mates."

               All eyes turned to look at you. Edward's brows were drawn into a deep glare and you uncomfortably looked away. The family would either hate you because you were with their 'dad' or hate you because you freed him from your bond. Either way, there was no way to win.

               "Hm," Aro murmured thoughtfully, "I wonder if it is because she is human or because of...something else." He threw a significant look to you that you ignored the best you could.

               Edward started growling again.

               "Aro," Carlisle's voice growled out, impatient. "What is going on with my mate?"

               "I think, my dear friend, that that is a question best left for said mate to answer. However, first, I believe our ceremony should get underway."

               Immediately, all the Cullen's stiffened. Only Bella and yourself remained unaware to what exactly that meant.

               "Y/N," Aro said suddenly, taking a seat in his throne and gently pulling you to stand beside him, "your mate, Carlisle has marked and been marked in return by another. Now, as a human, you probably do not feel as insulted as a vampire would, for this is one of the worst things that a true mate can do to another. The highest form of cheating our world has."

               Carlisle's head bowed down as if under a huge weight and Esme looked from him to you with shiny eyes. Tears? Great, as if you didn't feel awful before...

               "As his actual mate," Aro continued when you didn't say anything, "you get to decide how he should be punished."

               It was quiet for a moment before you suddenly blinked and snapped your head down to meet Aro’s ruby eyes. "What? Me?"

               The vampire king nodded. "Yes, you. You were the one slighted and so, you are the one to demand the compensation. We've seen a few cases of this over the centuries. Some vampires have their mates tortured to teach them a lesson, others have had their mates kill the vampire they mistakenly marked while a few have even had their mates killed."

               Your eyes, which had gotten progressively wider now threatened to pop out of your head. Why was everything so violent with these people? You were suddenly even more thankful that you weren’t a vampire... You didn't want to feel the need to have Carlisle do any of those things!

               "Since you are human, my guard is at your disposal for whichever method you choose that you cannot fulfill yourself. Of course, you don't have to do any of those options. You are free to choose whatever you wish."

               You were silent as you stared at the Cullen's, mind racing to try and find a way that would appease the ceremony but that didn't involve hurting anybody. Especially Carlisle.

               It’s not like it was his fault that he found a woman and fell in love with her! Granted, it wasn’t your fault either that your eyes met, but maybe, you could fix it for him? After all, what kind of future could you have with Carlisle if he hated you for taking away his freedom and choice of mate?

               "Might I suggest the second option that other slighted mates have used in the past?" Aro spoke up after a few minutes of you trying to figure out what to do.

               Your eyes snapped back to his. "The option where you have your mate kill the woman he marked that was not you,” Aro continued with a barely concealed smirk. “I do believe this will solve quite a lot in this case."

               You’re not sure where you got the guts to do it, but you glared heatedly down at Aro's smirking face. He knew of your half baked plan to get Carlisle and Esme back together and was just saying that to get a rise out of the Cullen's.

               And boy, did it work.

               Bella gasped while Esme's eyes shot to yours. She quickly averted her gaze, though you could see her hands trembling. Edward was looking at you with an unreadable expression and Carlisle... Carlisle looked miserable and heartbroken. He honestly thought...they all honestly thought that you would...

               You felt tears sting your eyes. Did they really have so little faith in you? Think so little of you that they thought you would have Carlisle tear apart the women he loves because they had marked each other? Were you really that awful of a person to them? You didn't choose to be his mate! You didn't mean to take him away from anybody!

               A stubborn tear broke free and languidly trailed down the side of your face.

               Edward's face bore the softest expression you'd ever seen pointed in your direction and you shut your eyes to block him out. You didn't need his pity. Or anybody else’s.

               Taking a shaky breath, you drew your shoulders back. You’d made your decision.

               You opened your eyes and with as much courage as you could muster, you looked down to meet the expectant eyes of the Vampire King seated in his throne beside you.

               “Kill me instead,” you murmured quietly, though you knew that every vampire in the room could hear you if the sudden deafening silence was any indication.

               And then all hell broke loose.

               “What?!” Edward roared, practically foaming at the mouth and to your surprise, Esme echoed his horrified exclamation with her own, shocked yell of, “Y/N!”.

               But your gaze then locked on Carlisle. He looked a mix of horrified, angry and absolutely devastated.

               “Y/N,” he whispered, voice breaking at the end and you were stunned to see what looked like a tear roll down his face. You weren’t aware vampires could cry.

               You shifted, uncomfortable and not quite sure what to do as Carlisle slowly began to walk towards you, hands lifted up in a gesture of submission.

               “Y/N,” he murmured again as he got closer, “please. Don’t.”

               You shifted again, not sure if you should step back or stay where you were as he approached.

               “Don’t what?” you finally managed to choke out.

               “Don’t ask to have yourself…,” he trailed off, not able to put into words you asking to have yourself killed. “Please, Y/N. Please, just punish me instead. Whichever option would make you feel better, but please, let it be against me. Not you.”

               He was now only a few steps away from you, standing on the first step to the thrones.

               “Please,” he started again but you interrupted him with a broken, “I have to!”

               Silence permeated the throne room again and Carlisle slowly took another step towards you, golden eyes searching your face.

               You couldn’t stand the worry and concern you saw in his eyes and took a step back, letting your gaze drop to the floor.

               “I have to,” you repeated, voice a little stronger but no louder than your broken murmur before. “I…I can’t see you hurt, Carlisle. And you’re… you’re not happy with me, you never could be, but with Esme you’re—”

               “Stop!” Carlisle begged, closing the distance between you swiftly and causing you to gasp and stiffen in his sudden embrace. “Y/N, please,” the vampire pleaded into your hair. “Don’t do this. Don’t say things like that. I am sorry, so so sorry.”

               Carlisle was suddenly pulling away but before you could do more than blink in protest, he was kneeling in front of you, his head bowed low enough that his forehead was lightly resting on your abdomen.

               “Y/N, I am sorry,” he repeated, “So sorry, darling.”

               Your heart rate tripled at the endearment and the feeling of cold, gentle hands slipping up to wrap around your waist as his head pressed a bit further into your stomach.

               “I have put you through….through too much these past few weeks. And I am not asking for forgiveness. Just that you let me be punished. You are too good for any of this, especially for-for death. Please, Y/N. Decide what punishment you want me to face, but keep yourself out of it.”

               You weren’t sure what to do.

               You had your mate clinging to you, begging you to have him punished and to save yourself, calling you darling and apologizing for how he’d treated you. But on the other hand…he wouldn’t be happy with you, would he? You could never live with yourself if you had him punished. All he did was mark the woman he loved and be marked in return. Why should he get punished for being suddenly bound to you?

               This really was the only way.

               “Carlisle,” you said quietly, with a sad smile, lifting a hand and running it through his hair, “It’s alright. I’m not upset with you – I understand. You and Esme have a connection that you and I will never have. And that’s okay. But this arrangement can’t work with me still in the picture. I’ve made up my mind, but it’s okay. It’s what I want.”

               A wretched sound tore itself from the vampire kneeling at your feet and suddenly, you found yourself whisked away and in what looked like a garden, your head spinning from his vampire speed.

               You were sat on a stone bench, your back pressed against the castle wall behind it and an almost frantic vampire doctor hovering above you.

               “I won’t allow you to have yourself killed because of me, Y/N,” Carlisle said firmly, sounding both fierce and heartbroken at the same time. “I have wronged you, my family has wronged you, but you…you have done nothing to deserve any of this, least of all death. If I have to, I will beg the Volturi to punish me, but I will not let you put any punishment on yourself.”

               “Carlisle,” you started gently, but the doctor interrupted you by falling to his knees before you once again.

               “Please, Y/N. I know that I have no right to ask anything of you, but please, do not do this to yourself.  I could not bear it if anything happened to you.”

               Your brow furrowed as you looked down at the vampire at your feet.

               “You…you can’t possibly care,” you murmured in confusion, mind racing over how you had been treated the last few weeks. He couldn’t really be trying to convince you that he’d cared all along?

               “I do care,” the blonde vampire murmured. “I have been a fool, Y/N and I am not looking for your forgiveness, for I know I do not deserve it. And I never would be able to earn it. But I do care for you and I care what happens to you. All I am asking is that you don’t die for me and certainly not for anyone else in the family. I will fight to ensure that nothing happens to you, that no one hurts you again. Please, Y/N. Just…allow the ceremony to progress with me as the punished. I will do whatever you ask of me, endure anything you could think of. Just not your death. Please not that.”

               You leaned back a little to better look him in the eye and asked dubiously, “If I wanted to follow Aro’s suggestion? The second option? Where you were to kill Esme, you’d be fine with that?”

               Carlisle’s eyes showed pain, but also conviction when he steadily answered, “I would do it if that was your wish.”

               Your jaw dropped.

               “What?! But, you love her! Why would you even consider killing her just because I said so?!”

               “Because you are my Mate!” Carlisle shouted right back, causing your eyes to widen even further. “I have been a fool, Y/N, but that hasn’t changed the fact that you are the One for me. You are my Mate. And I have treated you abhorrently. Whatever you would wish, I would give you.”

               You crossed your arms defensively and looked over his shoulder at the foliage behind him.

               “You’re only saying that because of the Pull,” you murmured, feeling your eyes tear up again as your mate, the one you have been hopelessly attracted to for weeks, said all the things you’d been hoping he’d say.

               But you knew he didn’t mean it.

               He couldn’t.

               A gentle hand cupped your cheek and turned your face to his.

               “I can feel the Pull,” he agreed, shushing you as you made a sound in distress. “But it does not dictate my actions, nor does it dictate my feelings. If the Pull was that strong, and there is a part of me that wishes it was, none of the last few weeks would have happened. The Pull gives us direction and a purpose, it shows us who is our Match. But it does not force us. Not in the way you’ve been thinking. Yes, over time, even the most stubborn vampires will listen to it more and more, but only because it feels right. I…,” he paused before he sighed heavily and continued, “I have not been a good Mate, I have been ignoring and fighting the Pull. For a variety of reasons, none of them good, and none of them have anything to do with you and whatever shortcomings you think you possess. I am an old fool, Y/N. But a fool that has learned to listen to fate and has grown to care for you. Please, please believe me. I do not wish any more harm to befall you, especially because of me.”

               You were silent for a few long moments, just staring into the golden eyes in front of you.

               “What would you have me do, Carlisle?” you asked tiredly, worn out from the emotions the last few weeks had wrought upon you.

               “Nothing,” was his immediate response. “I am in no position to ask or demand anything of you, Y/N. But…if I could, if you would permit me, I would ask the favor that you not ask the Volturi for your death. Anything else, I will agree to and give you. Anything. Just not that.”

               “What about the bond?” you murmured after a moment. “What would you have me do about the bond?”

               “Nothing,” he replied again, though you could tell that it was not as easy for him to say this time around. “I deserve nothing from you, least of all your companionship and love in a bond. I would ask, if you would allow me to occasionally be by your side, to keep the bond satisfied so you would feel no ill effects.”

               When he didn’t say anything else you asked, “That’s it? You wouldn’t have me be changed? Try and change my mind so that I would agree to a relationship?” Your eyes shuttered as a horrible thought occurred to you. “Would you just go back to Esme?”

               “No!” Carlisle rushed to reassure you, suddenly standing and leaning over you, one knee on the bench by your side.

               “Esme and I are no longer, Y/N. We will not be together again. You are my Mate, my Only. There will be no other for me. I would not ask you to become like me; I do not deserve to even think of trying to change your mind and be with me in any capacity. I realize I ruined my chances of that long ago. I just ask that you let me make sure you are not in any pain from the Bond for the rest of your life. However long that may be.”

               “Y/N?” a voice spoke up from your left and you looked over to see one of the Volturi guards standing in the doorway. “The Masters asked that we bring you and the Cullen back into the throne room. The ceremony cannot be delayed any longer.”

               Carlisle slowly straightened, golden eyes roving over every inch of your form as if committing it to memory while he helped you stand from the bench.

               “Um, thank you,” you murmured to the guard. With one last look at Carlisle, you headed over to the guard, Carlisle falling into step behind you.

               You would have to come up with another plan then, to appease the ceremony. You would do as Carlisle asked and not ask to be killed yourself, but you still refused to have your bond mate hurt.

               Glancing behind you as subtly as you could, you took in the sight of Carlisle walking behind you, and felt your heart flutter slightly.

               You wouldn’t be trusting him any time soon, but if he meant what he said…well, you had years to have him prove himself to you.

               Maybe, just maybe…there was hope for you two yet.