#to Hux and Kyle ren from Star Wars

[spheroz]

GUYS

EVERTHING IS GREAT

ITS NIT A HUX KYLO SITUATION

ITS A GAY SITUATION

GUYS THEY HAD TENSION AND NOW THEY’RE STARTING A COMPANY TOGETHER

GUEERS🫵

[therenlover]

Therenlover’s Official Fanfic Glossary!

Hey hey hey! This is the place where you can find all my up-to-date fanfics linked nicely, read about what projects I have upcoming, and learn what requests I’m taking at the moment! Cheers!

This post is massive so, for the sake of your dash, everything is under the cut

A NOTE ABOUT REQUESTS!

I will do my best to fulfill any requests I get while my ask box/requests are open! That being said, I cannot promise every request will get done, and that if they do, they’ll be done in a timely manner. I’m currently working on a long-form project that needs a lot of time and energy to come out consistently, so unless I’m doing a writing event most of my writing juice will be focused on that. That being said, if you want something ask! The worst I can possibly do is direct you towards someone else who might be able to write what you want if I cant.

If I choose not to do your request based on personal preference (it makes me uncomfy/I don’t write for the character at that time/I don’t feel I can write what you want/etc.) I will do my best to contact you and let you know! That being said, if you think your ask got buried/forgotten, feel free to message me again and let me know, but please tell me when you message me if I should be looking for a prior request.

Characters/Fandoms I will write for currently

 💙 = I’m Currently Super Inspired To Write For This Character

Marvel/X-Men

Bucky Barnes

Loki

Peter Maximoff 💙

Pietro Maximoff

Helmut Zemo 💙

Hank McCoy

Ralph Bohner 💙

Vision

American Horror Story

Tate Langdon

Kit Walker 💙

Kyle Spencer (Pre- and Post- Death)

Jimmy Darling 💙

James Patrick March 💙

Kai Anderson

Fallout 4

Nick Valentine

Hancock

Star Wars

Poe Dameron

Armitage Hux 💙

Kylo Ren/Ben Solo

Finn

Han Solo

Assorted/Random

Diarmuid Ua Duibhne - FGO

Cu Chulainn/Cu Alter - FGO

Warren Lipka - American Animals 💙

Enjolras - Les Miserables

Grantaire - Les Miserables

Gabriel - Supernatural

Imagines - REQUESTS CLOSED

Songs From Musicals Y/N Would Sing To The Evans

Characters: Tate Langdon, Kit Walker, Kyle Spencer, Jimmy Darling, James Patrick March, Kai Anderson, Peter Maximoff

Rating: T

How The Evans (+ Quicksilver) Would React To Yoplait’s New Gushers Yogurt

Characters: Tate Langdon, Kit Walker, Kyle Spencer, Jimmy Darling, James Patrick March, Rory Monahan, Kai Anderson, Peter Maximoff

Rating: T

Would The Danny Bunch Survive A Holiday With My Family?

Characters: Laszlo Kreizler, Alex Kerner, Niki Lauda, Andrea Marowski, Ernst Schmidt, Helmut Zemo

Rating: T

Headcanons - REQUESTS CLOSED

Modern! AU Armitage Hux Boyfriend Headcanons

Zemo With A Well Dress S/O Headcanons

Zemo Getting Jealous Headcanons

Oneshots - REQUESTS CLOSED

Marvel/X-Men

Helmut Zemo

One Last Night In Madripoor

Synopsis: Baron Helmut Zemo is a lonely, wanted man looking for some fun, you’re a piss-poor bounty hunter in search of a connection before leaving your life of crime behind, and fate has brought you together at a party the likes of which has never been seen before. You only have one night left in Madripoor, so why not take a chance?

Rating: 18+

Word Count: 4200~

Still Some Catching Up To Do

Synopsis: As a member of the criminal underworld, people walk out of your life all the time. Some are killed, others kill themselves, most get caught and only a couple get out of the life unscathed, disappearing into the world never to be seen again. Very few walk back in. So when your supposedly incarcerated ex-lover, the Winter Soldier, and the Falcon waltzed through your door and made you murder your boss, needless to say, you were surprised and more than a little bit pissed.

Rating: 16+

Word Count: 6800~

Nine Years Starved

Synopsis: It had been a little over nine years since Helmut Zemo lost his family, his country, and his sanity. Nine years since his last kiss. Nine years since he felt like a human man. Finally, he was ready to start over again, but first, he had to pay his penance back where it all began; Novi Grad. That’s when, by the grace of the fates, he met you.

Rating: G

Word Count: 7000~

Daddy Dearest

Synopsis: Not everyone gets lucky enough to go from being a broke college student in New York to being the sugar baby to literal royalty, but not everyone is you. Most people would be worried about messing things up or losing him to someone else, but you knew he would never find another baby just like you. Besides, you knew exactly what to do to keep him wrapped around your little finger. He may have been the daddy, but you pulled the reins.

Rating: 18+

Word Count: 8000~

In Fleeting Touches & Airy Sighs

Part One   Part Two   Part Three   Part Four

Synopsis: As a wanted man, Helmut Zemo spends most of his time jumping from place to place in the hopes of avoiding a trip back to prison. Unfortunately, that means he can’t always be home in your arms. When he is, though, in the rare moments of calm, you’re reminded of just how worth it it’s been to wait, even if that wait was only shortened by the arrival of your enemies.

Rating: 18+

Word Count: 35,700~

Two Bodies In The Rain

Synopsis: It was raining the day you finally had to admit your feelings to Helmut. You hated to tell him the way you did, under the grey skies as your blood pooled below you, but at least you knew, in the end, he had seen the real you, even just once. That was enough.

Rating: T

Word Count: 5600~

Rest

Synopsis: Living life on the lam with your escaped super-villain lover means things rarely slow down enough for a real rest. When the exhaustion starts to take its toll on you, though, he knows exactly what to do to ease the pain. He may not be a good man, but he’s a good husband when it counts.

Rating: T

Word Count: 3200~

American Horror Story

Jimmy Darling

Red Nights In Jupiter

Synopsis: At the end of another long day, you fall into bed with Jimmy Darling. The men you served throughout the day don’t matter then, nor do the coins in the mason jar by the door, or the women scheduled to attend Jimmy’s next Tupperware party. No, in that quiet darkness it’s just you and the man you love, bone-tired and happy to be home. Who could ask for more?

Rating: 16+

Word Count: 3000~

James Patrick March

Heartsick

Synopsis: When you fall ill, James is given a forceful awakening about how he’s been neglecting your needs and what he must do to prevent harm from befalling you again.

Rating: 16+

Word Count: 3700~

In Sickness And In Health

Synopsis: Normally people don’t have their wedding and funeral on the same day, but you and James don’t quite have a normal relationship, do you? Besides, you wouldn’t wanna go any other way.

Rating: 18+

Word Count: 5500~

Fallout 4

Currently Empty

Star Wars

Currently Empty

Assorted/Random

Currently Empty

Long Form Works/Series

Young Artist!Zemo AU

Chapter One: The Boy With The Easel

Synopsis: About a month into your first semester at Novi Grad’s top university, you finally meet the strange young man that you’ve taken to calling “easel boy” in the back of a bookshop. From a distance, he always seemed cold and aloof. As you get to know him, though, you realize things aren’t always what they seem.

Rating: T

Word Count: 7000~

Till Forever Falls Apart (A Peter Maximoff/Reader Series)

Chapter One: Welcome Home

Synopsis: As if getting thrown through the multiverse, trapped in an attic (albeit a cool one), mind-controlled to manipulate his grieving sister, and subsequently dragged out of Westview “for his own safety” by the FBI wasn’t enough, Peter Maximoff has now been shipped off to New York to live with a glorified baby sitter like some tragic orphan in a comic book until they find a way to get him back home. Things are not always as they seem, though, and this change might just be for the better.

Rating: T

Word Count: 2400~

Chapter Two: The Doctor Is In

Synopsis: Peter’s first few days in his new home are mostly uneventful, so he decides it’s the perfect time to dust off his running goggles and steal some shit. The building with the massive circular stained glass window seems like a great place to start! People with buildings that lavish are usually rich and weak, so what could possibly go wrong?

Rating: T

Word Count: 2800~

Chapter Three: It’s Always Been You

Synopsis: After a month of adapting to his new universe, Peter Maximoff can confidently say that he likes his new life more than his old one. Sure, he misses home sometimes, but he’s been far too busy flirting with his new roommate to spend time crying over the things he’s lost. Everything is smooth sailing until a strange journal in his roommate’s study leaves him with more questions than he knows what to do with. Now he’s on a mission to discover who he’s really living with before she has the chance to turn against him.

Rating: T

Word Count: 8600~

Chapter Four: Before You Go

Synopsis: Peter, after days of contemplation, has realized that part of him loves Y/N no matter what she is or what she’s been through. Unfortunately, he can’t find her anywhere. When she finally returns home with the intention of leaving again, Peter realizes it’s his last chance to tell her how he really feels. Will he succeed, or will he fail to be fast enough once again?

Rating: T

Word Count: 4000~

Chapter Four And A Half: Gimme Swayze

Synopsis: Now that the issue of Y/N leaving is out of the way, and Peter has finally kissed her, he falls into the motions of learning how to love someone for the first time. It’s easier than he thought it would be.

Rating: T

Word Count; 2600~

Cakes For The Evans: A Blogging And Baking Adventure!

Kai Anderson’s Disaster Cake

Hey you! If you’ve made it this far down the list, thanks for supporting me as an author! I’ll be linking my AO3 here. I post everything there shortly before I post it here, and there are some older fics there you might enjoy along the way! It’s also easier to drop comments over there and I keep them open for non-members, so give me a shout if you liked what I wrote!

I love you all, you make me so happy, and without you support I would never be motivated to write! Cheers!

[swsequelsalt]

So the good news is that even though it's set in the sequels, Galaxy's Edge's actual attractions are based more on other content and they're really only referencing the sequels when absolutely necessary, like when they have to say "Resistance" instead of "Rebel Alliance."

This is a VERY old response to this ask; I apologize for that. I don’t even remember when you sent this at this point :( I went to Galaxy’s Edge near the end of 2019 (shortly before the pandemic exploded). Kylo Ren and Rey were the primary characters walking around and greeting visitors, with Kylo even sporadically giving orders to the troopers that accompany him. (I openly laughed at the sight of whiny Kyle Ron trying to act intimidating towards park visitors; my partner did not approve of my refusal to play along). 

Millennium Falcon: Smuggler’s Run is very clear that it takes place when Chewie and Rey are the primary keepers of the Falcon and Han is dead. And of course, Rise of the Resistance has opened since I was there - and that ride is absolutely a love letter to the sequels. You can watch plenty of ride-through videos online. It’s very technically impressive, but you’ll be seeing Rey, Poe, and even animatronics of Finn, Kylo Ren, and Hux. If you want to marvel at the tech involved in that one, there’s no escaping the depressing reality of Disney Star Wars. :(

So yes, as of almost two years ago, Galaxy Edge was very much mired in the Disney sequel continuity. It’s hard to get away from it, unfortunately. However, there was at least one promising sign during my time there...

Outside of Galaxy’s Edge, there is a building with a series of ongoing meet-and-greet opportunities. This building doesn’t represent some kind of “official canon” the way that Galaxy’s Edge and the upcoming Galactic Starcruiser are supposed to, so it’s entirely removed from any concerns with the timeline. There, the ongoing meet-and-greets with BB-8 and Chewie were still running strong when I went, but the Kylo Ren had been removed from the lineup, replaced by the option to “encounter” Darth Vader. (One does not simply “meet and greet” Darth Vader, clearly.) Park staff told me that Kylo Ren wasn’t attracting very many visitors. IMAGINE THAT.

But of course, this all took place in late 2019. And as I write this, it’s Fall of 2021. The parks have been struggling with comparatively low attendance to the pandemic for some time, but Disney still makes adequate money in Florida especially. So what’s coming down the pipe for Galaxy’s Edge? Where are we now? 

For months now, there have been escalating rumors that Disney is interested in shifting the timeline of Galaxy’s Edge. Up to this point, it’s been clear that Batuu (the planet that you supposedly visit while you are there) is eternally locked in a period between The Last Jedi and The Rise of Skywalker, but Disney is supposedly interested in trying to shift it to a period between the Original Trilogy and the sequels. And if you’re wondering “why would they bother” — well, they want to have Din Djarin and little Grogu and Ahsoka Tano available to them, because their Disney+ shows have become the most successful of their attempts at continuing the Star Wars legacy. They’re also currently ongoing concerns, so having those characters wandering the parks can provide benefits in attracting visitors AND in providing cross-promotion for the shows (and Disney+ as a whole).

Though they seem to be widely accepted as true, I can’t help but continue to doubt these rumors. Because: HOW could they do such a thing?! I mean, sure, you can toss some new dialogue into the Millennium Falcon ride to indicate that Offscreen Han has loaned the Falcon out, but “Rise of the Resistance” is genuinely impossible to time-shift. You’d basically have to rework the damn thing from the ground up! And would they really keep the rides in a separate place and time as the rest of the park? I... just don’t know.I think they’d be better off just removing Galaxy’s Edge from any “official canon” and letting all things Star Wars wander freely there, regardless of timeline. That way you can let all kinds of heroes and villains flow through the place on any given day, and you don’t have to go back and edit your rides to suit. I don’t think that’s on the table at this point, though. 

[nonasuch]

how I would fix star wars

inevitably, I have been thinking about How I Would Fix Star Wars, and make the parts of TRoS that displeased me into a more coherent story. 

unfortunately, to do so will require the use of a time machine and veto power over the Lucasfilm Story Group. but IF I had those things here is what I would do:

I actually would not make a lot of changes to TFA. The main ones would be:

toning down Starkiller a bit as a threat, to a one-shot-per-planet deal but with a faster recharge time

slightly more stormtrooper stuff -- establish what Finn’s leaving behind and give Phasma a little depth. 

if possible, put some kind of distinguishing visual marker on the trooper who marked Finn’s helmet.

a small background detail that isn't important yet: after the village massacre at the beginning, show stormtroopers collecting the bodies, trooper and villager alike. if possible, do this after every scene with a significant body count, throughout all three movies.

either give the knights of ren some actual stuff to do or cut them out entirely

show kyle chafing at snoke’s leash, maybe demanding to know more about some of snoke’s various Secret Projects, and being dismissed

give rey a little time to settle in with the Resistance before leaving to find Luke. we don't have to show it much, just make it clear that she’s making a home there and has bonded strongly with Leia

clean up some weird pacing and make the travel times/distances between planets more consistent

honestly other than that I wouldn't change much. I genuinely like TFA a lot and its strength is in how well it establishes the new characters.

for TLJ, some bigger changes but the bones of it I'd leave alone:

make it more clear why the tracking through hyperspace is a big deal and make the solution less of a fetch quest

I really like parts of the Canto Bight plot but I would probably swap it out for something with more stormtroopers in it -- let Finn interact with other troopers and remind us that there are individuals under those helmets

(a recurring joke: Finn can always tell troopers apart when they’re in uniform, and Rose can never figure out how. he thinks it’s because he was a trooper, but no, it's because he’s Force sensitive)

maybe get close to convincing some of them to desert, but either they fail last-minute or the deserters get caught and killed

Finn and Rose escape by the skin of their teeth thanks to a trooper who helps them, letting them know that even if they aren't brave enough to leave, there are plenty of troopers who aren't all-in with the First Order

again, after any major fight show the body cleanup. troopers carrying and stacking the dead in neat rows. start hinting that there is something more ominous here than fanatical tidiness

the Snoke stuff -- make it more obvious that Snoke is orchestrating stuff other than just running the First Order. maybe have Hux ask about the cargo ships they're sending to the Unknown Regions, and get shot down

make part of Kyle’s refusal to leave w Rey due to his burning need to Know All The Secrets, and conviction that as Supreme Leader he could really clean up the joint

once Snoke is dead, show Kyle getting access to his secret files/vaults; do NOT show what he finds there

I'd also want to clean up some wonky pacing and timeline/travel distance stuff, probably, but again I really like most of the movie so it’s nothing major

also keep Phasma around for the next movie! what the fuck, she rules, why would you not

okay so that brings us to TRoS, which… would need a pretty major overhaul. 

First of all, we are working under the assumption that I have a time machine, so I made Carrie Fisher go to the cardiologist on the reg starting on day 1 of TFA rehearsals, and she’s fine and able to play the part as she was meant to.

with that in place, here’s how I would restructure:

we keep the Hammer Horror opening scene, but tweak the Emperor’s reveal. he’s much more corpse-y, without the tech umbilical keeping him alive -- a wraith animated by Dark power. 

lots of grandiose claims about his unstoppable army and his impending dominion over the galaxy, ultimate triumph over the Light, etc

don't show the armada yet -- just kyle’s reaction, which is genuine fear.

news of the Emperor’s return isn't a broadcast, but a whisper. a transmission from a terrified First Order cargo pilot, who’s learned the truth about his one-way trip to the Unknown Regions. passed through the lower ranks by rumor and hearsay. eventually leaked to the Resistance by an unknown First Order source

I like the idea from the beginning of the movie, that Rey’s trying to speak to dead Jedi through the Force. but it’s not working, and she shares her frustration with Leia

make it clear that she and Leia have a deep, strong bond.

give Rey a Jedi artifact to hunt for. maybe there’s a place or a thing that she thinks will let her commune with fallen Jedi, and that’s what they go looking for.

that lets us keep some of the fetch quest, but the First Order’s not as actively on their tail. 

they keep crossing paths anyway, and every time there are troopers doing something worse. maybe at one point they see troopers refuse to massacre civilians, and being killed themselves instead.

also they take Rose with them, because this movie needs more Rose

still have those post-battle scenes of body cleanup. now the cleanup crews are being killed once they’re done

this could be a good use for the Knights of Ren, actually. whatever is happening, they're part of it

Leia is more active throughout: she's on the move, recruiting allies for the Resistance, trying to figure out what's happening in the Unknown Regions

she has an actual scene with Lando, and he goes to Rey on her orders

tweak Poe’s backstory with Zorii. he worked with her while undercover for the Resistance, and left them in the lurch when the General needed him back. 

he’d have recruited her, if there had been time, but now he's glad he didn't: most everyone Poe recruited to the Resistance died at Crait.

when Rey crosses paths with Kyle, he’s obviously rattled. he Knows Something that he won't or can't tell her and he's even more fatalistic than usual.

lean harder on the unease/whispers of dissent in the First Order as they're told to do more and more awful things. maybe a scene where someone -- not Hux -- disagrees openly, and Kyle says something that implies that he's getting orders from someone above his head.

this gives Hux a chance to snark at Kyle -- isn't he supposed to be the Supreme Leader, now? who's telling him what to do?

off Kyle’s reaction -- someone is telling him what to do, and he's terrified of them in a way he never was of Snoke.

(keep Hux-as-informant, that was done perfectly)

Rey’s artifact hunt still takes her to the Death Star wreckage, off rumors that Palpatine hoarded Jedi artifacts. 

we meet Janna &co. Finn is so relieved and happy to meet other troopers who survived defecting. Janna tells him that there used to be more, that it used to be easier to get out, but more and more troopers have been killed in the attempt, without escaping.

by now it’s clear: there is Something Wrong With The First Order, beyond the obvious.

Rey fights Kyle in the Death Star ruins. Kyle tells her the Emperor wants to turn her to the Dark Side, that he can’t be refused or stopped, that even death won’t let her escape from him.

the fight plays out similarly, but Leia’s distraction doesn't kill her. 

after Rey heals him, Kyle faces his fear and talks to Leia via Force bond. He tells her what the Emperor is planning, and it’s Ben Solo who leaves the ruins.

he can give Leia files or some other concrete proof via the same trick he uses with Rey in the movie, because that’s honestly very cool and it was used really well, so we’re keeping that

when Rey talks to Luke on Ach-To, he tells her that Palpatine used the Empire to sow chaos and fear, because that made the Dark Side stronger and gave him more power to tap into.

Luke says: “I think he would have been happy to burn the whole galaxy down, as long as he could rule over the ashes.”

Rey realizes she can’t hide from the Emperor, and knows he’ll never turn her to the Dark. she goes after him.

Leia sends the Resistance to back Rey up and sets out to rally the galaxy with Lando and Chewie

finally, it’s confrontation time! Rey faces Zombie Palpatine, and he reveals his plan in all its glory:

he’s built an army of the dead. ghost ships, crewed by all those bodies we've been watching the First Order collect for three movies.

some of them we recognize, if we’re paying attention: the trooper who marked Finn’s helmet, Lor San Tekka, Hux. there are long-dead clone troopers, little more than skeletons in filthy white armor. half-functional Separatist droids. Resistance fighters and First Order officers killed on Crait. countless civilians. 

they’re all dead, all animated by Palaptine’s Dark Side powers, fueled by the strife and chaos he continues to sow throughout the galaxy

he doesn’t want to blow up any more planets. he wants to kill the shit out of absolutely everyone: the end of all life, and all Light. everyone in the galaxy a soldier in his undead army

he wants Rey to strike him down and become the new Sith Empress, ruling over an empire of ashes.

but we are discarding the granddaughter shit, because frankly it is not necessary and makes no sense. 

he can just be like ‘ah yes, a feral desert child, powerful in the Force, with no inconvenient ties to hold her back. I've had good luck with those, mostly.’

now, a brief side trip: what is the First Order doing, in the midst of all this?

well, the rank and file are actually not super down with the ‘join the glorious army of the dead’ plan. half of them are in open revolt; some try to run, some seize control of their ships and decide to fight for the living

Phasma leads Team Living. yeah, I kept her for a reason! Gwendoline Christie is great at this!

Ben shows up as before, fights the Knights, does the cool lightsaber trick with Rey. he fights with Leia’s saber.

when Palpatine drains their life force to restore himself, though, something happens differently:

it’s actually Leia’s life force. she gives up her life for her son and for the daughter of her heart, willingly and gladly, knowing she has rallied the galaxy to their aid. she tells them, before she goes, that help is on the way

the giant fleet that arrives to fight Palpatine has First Order ships in it. finally, everyone is on the same side. Palpatine has been playing both sides against each other since Episode 1, but it won't work anymore, now that they know what he wants. the long con is over. they're united against him.

Rey beats Palpatine the same way, Ben revives her the same way, but Leia’s sacrifice means he has enough juice left to survive it. 

idk about the kiss; I am Reylo-agnostic

but he’s going to try to shepherd the First Order into something that builds and protects, instead of destroying. 

people like Janna and Finn, who got out, and Rose, who lived under their heel, will show him how.

Finn is Force sensitive, and so are some of the other former troopers. 

some of them want to become Jedi

Finn wants to follow Leia’s path: do the training so he understands how to use the Force, but he's not meant to be a Jedi. he's going to be a leader -- not a general, hopefully, but a leader for peacetime.

so like. they won! hooray.

Rey takes the name Skywalker, still. Ben is fine with this: he’s a Solo-Organa. 

there can be a touching Force ghost reconciliation, or not, whatever

so. that is how to fix star wars. you’re welcome. if anyone out there has a time machine and an in with Lucasfilm, hit me up I guess?

[abouttimefortea]

initial rise of sky walker thöts:

finn and poe are husbands it’s not a matter of canon or not, that’s just the way it is and i know we all agree.

[poe voice]: General Dameron.” [finn voice]: “General Dameron.” because they’re married and are in love with each other

if they were going to give kyle ron a redemption arc... gotta say ladies! i’m glad they did it like that.

obviously fuck kylo ren but benjamin solo skywalker.... honey! i miss you and i never even knew you

the rey/ben kiss yeah it’s gonna be a NO from me!! i get why they did it but there are different ways to conclude the intimacy and/or complexity of their character development HEEELLLOOOO

adam driver is the kid in the group project who did all the work himself

shouldn’t even have to be said, but the fact that rey is a girl and was that quintessential to the conclusion of the star wars skywalker narrative arc... the bar is UNDERGROUND but.. nice.

give!!!!!! finn!!!!!! an!!!!!! lightsaber!!!!!!

rey yellow lightsaber

mr. oscar issac died on the cross for finnopoe in press interviews and he’s the only man that deserves my respect

weirdly forced heterosexual romantic relationship for no reason btw poe and zorii. why. did they do that [i know why]

i LOVE that little droid hacker bitch i don’t remember his name

why did they do rose so dirty [i know why]

chewie, you always have and always will be That Bitch

new droid D-O said “no thank you”

r2d2 cussing out c3po

i cannot say that i will forgive them for what they did to mr luke skywalker’s character arc! i cannot say it.

bb-8 is the only member of the millennium falcon crew that has any functioning brain cells and he’s a droid

hux is perhaps the pettiest bitch in the entire galaxy and i respect that

i will say that the wild luke and leia cgi flashback did warm my heart a lil bit

leia’s!!!!! lightsaber!!!

lastly, and perhaps most importantly

WHO FUCKED PALPATINE

[surprisegents]

star wars !!

thank you!! and please let me know if my ask got eaten btw!

the first character i ever fell in love with: luke skywalker! i had the green lightsaber growing up and everything 

a character that i used to love/like, but now do not: i still like cara dune but gina car*no's political views have made that a lot more difficult

a ship that i used to love/like, but now do not: luke/mara jade? i do dearly love mara jade but i just want them to be best friends. wlw/mlm solidarity 

my ultimate favorite character™: god… probably luke? i have too many opinions about him for it not to be luke

prettiest character: objectively? leia. maybe obi-wan and poe. extremely subjectively? din djarin lmao

my most hated character: kyle ron

my OTP: obi-wan/happiness. st0rmpilot. han/leia

my NOTP: literally anything to do with kyle ron. the fact that there are so many ren/hux fics is one of my many villain origin stories

favorite episode: empire strikes back or mandalorian ep 15

saddest death: i haven’t seen it yet but i do know about satine :( otherwise padmé for sure

favorite season: the original trilogy/mandalorian s2

least favorite season: the sequels :/ it’s the wasted potential for me

character that everyone else in the fandom loves, but i hate: this used to be boba fett but the mandalorian’s version totally won me over. hmm... i refuse to admit people like kylo so. darth maul

my ‘you’re piece of trash, but you’re still a fave’ fave: lando <3 also talon karrde from the thrawn books

my ‘beautiful cinnamon roll who deserves better than this’ fave: FINN!!! and the entire rogue one crew

my ‘this ship is wrong, nasty, and makes me want to cleanse my soul, but i still love it’ ship: huh, i honestly don’t have an answer to this! it’s not a ship vibe i enjoy

my ‘they’re kind of cute, and i lowkey ship them, but i’m not too invested’ ship: obi-wan/satine. f*nnrey. maybe rebelc*ptain & spiritass*ssin

[brehacrgana]

just watched TROS and i have NO WORDS... (except i also have many). what was that

at about half of the movie one guy stood up, put on his jacket and left...I don’t think he was wrong

spoilers below (the bad and the good - however little that might be). please come to talk if you’ve seen the movie

first of all...WHAT THE FUCK. what the fuck...i sat through the movie and i had to laugh at times because whatever was happening was so absurd shit i couldn’t even imagine. at other times i just sat with my mouth open and could not believe they really went there...it was that bad. how in the world is this the end of star wars

the way the movie started... in the title sequence...”THE DEAD SPEAK” lol. palpantine’s return or whatever shit announced immediatly (which i didn’t expect would happen); then the first scene of kylo ren in slo-mo killing some random people (literally who was that) in some woods and then finding palpantine’s cave or something where palps told him “hurr hurr i created snoke...i was every voice in your head...kill the girl” - sir how are you even alive. i literally don’t remember if this was explained in the movie and i don’t think so

rey - jesus christ. girl. i don’t know what they did to her character. but anyway. in the beginning of the movie leia did some jedi training with rey and i loved that...especially when rey adressed leia with “master”! but in the start of that scene rey was flying in the air while doing some meditation and that was absurd imo / i laughed lol. then kylo ren showed up because of that force bond shit and rey messed up her training which sucked

nice scene: finn and poe returning from some mission and meeting/reuniting with rey on the rebellion’s home base - rey and poe bickered a bit, rey and finn hugged...i liked that

rey finn and poe and chewie went to a desert planet where some party was going on. nice scene: rey talked to an alien being there and it was a cute, nice interaction that would have been heartwarming

lando shows up, points them to some cave, where a big snake or something was which had an injury lol...rey gave it some life power through the force  and healed it. LOL: foreshadowing...

kylo ren and the knights of ren (lol who are they even) show up on that planet. while the others try to make a ship ready to leave, rey (why...) goes and stands in the middle of the desert waiting for kyle ron to show up or whatever. he does of course and races at her with his ship, she does that jump from the trailer and cuts his ship in half. it crashes and explodes. no, kylo somehow doesn’t die from that. meanwhile poe and finn told chewie to get rey bc they have to leave (knights of ren approaching), but while rey is busy doing whatever the fuck that was, chewie gets captured by some stormtroopers and is led on their transport ship. it takes off. finn screams to rey “they have chewie” and rey uses the force to try and drag that ship back to the ground...kylo emerges and also uses the force on that ship, and they have a force battle until rey does palpantine style force lightning on that ship. it completely explodes. everyone thinks chewie is dead. i was really horrified, not gonna lie, like rey...

but lol. SOMEHOW chewie was on another transport ship (lol???? where was that) and is alive after all. they go to rescue him. while they fly to the stardestroyer where chewie is being kept prisoner, rey says that “yada yada people say they know me but nobody does” to finn and it is awful... arrived on the star destroyer, finn and poe want to free chewie, while rey fucks off to do her own thing and go to kylo’s quarters. force bond kylo appears, they fight blabla, he tells her...

“oh you wanted to take my hand, i kNoW YoU you’re a palpatine, he was your grandfather” ................................................ i read the spoilers so i knew this was gonna come, but seriously???? what a crack fucking theory. REY PALPANTINE!  I QUIT!!!

flashback to rey’s parents who look like nice people who tried to protect her by leaving her on jakku. palps killed them after they didn’t tell him where rey was

meanwhile finn poe and chewie are captured, stormtrooppers are going to execute them. then hux steps in hilariously, kills the stormtroopers, and is like “i’m the spy for the rebellion.” i laughed

who is zorii...or whatever her name was.

the trio gang goes to that planet where the remains of the death star are...they meet a group of horse riders, one of them jannah. i loved her! i really did. she was one of the bright spots for me in that shitshow. her and finn talk, she also used to be a stormtrooper and has the same story as finn

also Finn was shown very clearly to be force sensitive! loved that

rey does another solo trip and goes to the remains of the death star...where she meets dark!rey which was hilarious and absurd. they fight and at one point dark!rey hissed and bared her teeth at rey - i actually scream laughed

well then kylo ron came to that planet, the water fight scene happened, and actually rey fucking killed him!!! he died! cut to leia. she says “ben” and then somehow just actually dies too. seriously. just like that. FROM WHAT???

anyway rey feels that leia has died and lol idk she’s like oh know and resurrects kylo with the force. yeah. lol. she’s then like “yeah i did want to take your hand...ben’s hand” and cries and leaves

really...who is ben. why do you care. what

on the rebellion base people are gathered around leia’s dead body and i don’t remember her name, but lupita nyongos character say “farewell, dear princess” and that almost made me cry

back to kylo. he’s looking at the ocean in contemplation. suddenly a voice behind him says “hey, kid”. he turns around and it’s han fucking solo. LOL

they basically play out the same scene as in tfa just before kylo killed han except this time he doesn’t. han says kylo ron died and kylo yeets his lightsaber into the water.

ok, another hilarious absurd scene: rey goes to luke’s exile planet and sets kylo’s ship (which she took to fly there) on fire. she’s throwing the lightsaber in the flames but oh! a hand yeets out of the flames! it’s force ghost luke who caught the saber and is like oh you should be more careful with a jedi’s weapon.

luke then shows her LEIA’S LIGHTSABER and there’s a flashback scene of LEIA AND LUKE DOING JEDI TRAINING !!!! a good part of the movie

rey takes both lightsabers and flies to palpantine’s planet. she meets him in his cave. palps does he’s usual unimaginable power shit...”i want you to kill me...then my soul will go over to you and all the siths that have ever been will live in you”. whatever

“ben” also shows up of course, he kills the kights of ren with the lightsaber that was magically teleported to him by rey i guess

rey and “ben” face palps together. he is like oh your bond is so strong, let me take all your energy...very reminiscent of dementor’s in harry potter movies sucking out their souls lol. they drop to the ground, unconscious. palps lifts “ben” up and yeets him into a big abyss.

there was a nice scene in between of poe grieving for leia and saying he doesn’t know what to do/how they can make it, but then lando shows up and they talk about how lando and the old trio back in the day didn’t know how to make it either, but they still tried etc. and made it

ok another nice scene: while palps is doing super force lightning to destroy the rebel fleet or whatever, rey is on the ground gatherig strength and she hears the voices of old jedi masters...obi wan! anakin i’m pretty sure also!

then there’s a nice shot of her standing up and facing the emperor with lightsaber in hand.

she kills him, but dies doing it.

but wait lol...”ben” somehow crawls back out of that abyss to cry over her dead body. he also revives her with force power. they look at each other sappily and kiss.......no words. they fucking really went there

actually when that happened the people in the cinema made a lot of sounds, some said ew lmao others just laughed

then “ben” dies for good lol. people scream laughed

in the end there was a nice rebellion victory celebration scene, i always like scenes like that

rey goes to tattoine and buries the lightsabers of luke and leia who show up via force ghost. somehow rey then has a yellow lightsaber in her hand. some old woman comes along and asks who are you? rey says...i’m rey.....skywalker and then watches the sunset. the end.

in spoilers i read it was said that rey says she feels incomplete without kylo and goes to live on tattoine alone for the rest of her life. maybe i blacked out and didn’t get that, but i did not see it. it did not happen, right?

when the movie ended some people in the cinema actually started clapping.

lol. i don’t know what that was...yeah it had some good moments, but it really was the worts star wars movie of all times for me. it was wild and absurd and stupid as fuck and i am so, so disappointed. TFA i loved, there was so much potential there...but then tlj happened and somehow tros eneded up even worse than that. i don’t know what the worst part for me was, rey palpantine, leia’s death in that manner, reylo... it was a mess. it actually makes me really sad. bye felicia

[lightandwinged]

Alright, it’s review time, and it’s going to be spoilery and rambly because I’m still parsing my thoughts on everything SO. 

Sans spoilers: a solid and fitting conclusion, if a bit faster paced than I would’ve liked, but it adhered to the overarching themes of the Skywalker saga probably better than anything in the new trilogy has before, and I don’t know how, considering everything (namely that Space Mom is gone), they could have or would have done things differently. Not my absolute favorite (that will forever be RotJ), but still very good.

Spoilers below, be ye warned.

I found it utterly hilarious that the plot started with Kyle Ron finding the Macguffin and chillin out with Papa Palpatine while the Good Guys had to go on this entire huge quest to FIND the Macguffin to begin with, and the only reason he didn’t just fuck off and finish some dastardly plan while they were scurrying about and trying to find the Pyramid Of Doom was because he’s got a lot to work out in his feelings about Rey. Like shit, no wonder Papa Palpatine decided to just stick with his own bloodline for galactic domination, Skywalkers are useless.

(except Leia, who is awesome)

The inclusion of Carrie Fisher in this film was VERY well done, but it also hurt a lot because you could tell that her scenes were cobbled together from old material and not made of anything new. It was good and necessary, but it also just hurt, like a constant reminder that she’s gone and nobody could replace her ever. And I’ll get more to that in a minute.

The Macguffin questing honestly felt a lot like the first half of RotJ, where we have to go rescue Han right quick because Harrison Ford was pretty sure he didn’t want to Star Wars anymore, so here’s a sidequest for half the movie, with the only difference here being that the questline had to do with the actual Plot. I’ve been following the Star Wars leaks subreddit for a while (don’t read the comments, it’s a wretched hive of scum and villainy and bitterness), and I know that at one point, it was supposed to be this race between Team Dark Side and Team Light Side to get the Pyramid of Destiny and then they’d find out that oh shit, Sheev’s here, but that was scrapped... and I kind of wish it hadn’t been? It would’ve made the first half of frolicking through this planet... no this planet... no, no, it’s on this planet... feel a lot less distracting. 

The dynamic between Finn, Poe, and Rey was fantastic, because those three actors just have amazing chemistry on so many levels. They immediately fell into the dynamic of “we’re a polyamorous triad who’ve been living together for a while, and we really love each other, but we’re also a LITTLE BIT STRESSED RIGHT NOW OK” and that’s fair. I was glad to see all of it, and I just wish that we’d had more of it in both TFA and TLJ. It reminded me a LOT of how the best parts of the OT were always when Luke, Han, and Leia were together. 

And now I’m going to take a sulk break to think about what we could’ve had with that amazing dynamic.

I’m back. 

The new characters were some of the weaker parts of the film, I felt, save for Lando (because Billy Deeeeeeee). Dominic Monaghan, whom I love, could’ve had his role taken entirely by Rose, or Billie Lourde, and nobody would’ve noticed. And I don’t mind the addition of extra women to the cast, but Zorii and Jannah felt like they were just there to be like “Poe fucks women! Finn might too!” And... yanno, cool? But the OT3 stands. 

And then General Pryde, aptly named, should’ve been a bigger part in all three films because it was like... here’s this yahoo out of nowhere who’s apparently a really big Sheev fan and just... like... what? I mean, I’m a huge Sheev fan, too, but I wish he’d been more of a Piett, where we could’ve seen him worming his way up the ranks, which would’ve made his downfall more satisfying. Instead, it was just kind of like... eh? Cool, I guess? With Piett, you felt like “yeah, we’ve seen this guy fucking things up for our heroes for two entire movies now, and here he is, getting destroyed because of his pride, hahaha!” but with Pryde, it was like “wait, who are you? Oh you’re dead now? Okay, cool, I guess?”

And in conjunction with THAT, Hux was just wasted in this film. I fully accept the idea that he rose through the ranks because of nepotism or something, and I also fully accept that he’s an absolutely useless twink who can’t do anything without having Phasma top him weekly (she used to top both him and Ren, which is why they’re such disasters in this movie), but man, couldn’t we have like... taken him with us? Imagine the comedy potential as he’s brought back as a prisoner and Domhnall Gleeson gets even more screen time with Oscar Isaac. I don’t mind that he died a worthless death because he was basically a useless wretch, but I do feel like if the movie had given itself more breathing room, he could’ve been a lot of fun.

RELATED, the pacing. So in the beginning of the movie, the idea of a light skip (basically, just sort of using the hyperdrive without planning or anything) is brought up, and everyone involved in this action bounces from world to world to world in rapid fire fashion to get rid of a bunch of TIE fighters following them, and that’s roughly the pace of this film. There are a few moments of quiet and contemplation, but they’re so rare that they seem to last a lot longer than they actually do, and I think it’s mostly because this movie really feels like a Lord of the Rings style epic packed into a MCU time frame. And I’m not complaining about the time, because by the time the credits rolled, I had to pee so fucking badly, but I feel like also if we’d trimmed out a couple of things (like maybe we can get rid of Kijimi, I think it is? The snow planet? or just merge Kijimi and Pasaana?), we’d have had more time to breathe and that would’ve helped the pacing a lot. 

The slow moments in the film belonged almost exclusively to Rey and Kyle Ron, and honestly, Daisy Ridley and Adam Driver both deserve some sort of award recognition for their acting, the latter particularly. Without going into wild details about the plot, Kyle Ron does change his mind and go back to being Ben Solo, and god bless you so much Adam Driver because the change is instantaneous and delightful. If we’d seen significantly more Ben Solo than Kyle Ron, I’d totally be on board with the r.3y.10.z because this child omg. As it stands, the kiiiiissssss made me do like

in real life. It felt... mm, unearned, we’ll say. Maybe as a moment of “oh fuck that was intense and now we’re both alive” I could’ve bought it, but it wasn’t that, it was supposed to be this “my looooove” moment and just... sorry, but no. 

BUT that said, while I think his death was the only way this series could’ve ended for him because a redemption arc would’ve required a LOT more time and energy, and that just... wasn’t going to happen. The time to have him make the turn if we were going to see a redemption arc was during TLJ, and since he didn’t make that change, we don’t get a Zuko arc. And that’s FINE because that’s a lot of work for a three movie series. And I don’t want a TV series devoted to Ben Solo learning to not be a dick to people. That’s exhausting. 

But I do wish we’d gotten more time with him. The brief time we had, the bit of Han Solo snark that came out (”ow”), that was all delightful and made me understand what people see in the character (who I hate because he’s a great character to hate). 

(omg while I was writing this, someone was saying that they were in a theater with someone talking about how the movie should’ve ended with Kyle Ron giving Rey a Force baby, and Y’ALL THERE IS NOT ENOUGH NOPE IN THE WORLD)

Anyway, bullets now, for the times I cried:

Literally everything with Leia, but especially that her last word was “Ben” and her using every last bit of her energy to save her son because I GET THAT FEEL, and honestly, the only reason she wasn’t there raining death and destruction on Sheev by herself for grooming her baby was because Carrie Fisher died. But anyway, from the moment she dropped her headset on, I was a blubbering mess.

And then Han, just a memory, but looking more at peace than he ever has. He convinces his son to come home, and Ben now says, “Dad?” and Han just says, “I know,” and FUFUUFUFALSKJDLAKSJDF: SOBBING

And then CHEWIE reacting to Leia’s death just... UGH. I am destroyed utterly, still. 

Luke finally managing to Force lift the X-Wing out of the water made me cry as well, weirdly enough. 

And then whatever emotion I felt when Rey heard all the Jedi, and it was LITERALLY EVERYONE WHO HAS PLAYED A JEDI EVER COMING IN AND SAYING A LINE like not just the familiar ones but the ones you wouldn’t know unless you’d watched all the TV series and extra material... it was so much more than tears. I couldn’t cry because it wouldn’t have been enough to encompass everything that made me feel. Very sincerely well done. 

All-in-all, yeah, it was really good. I don’t get what everyone is so fussed over with it... it ties up the themes of the entire nine-movie arc pretty neatly and does basically the best it can with what it has. 

But a bigger point in its favor, for me, was seeing Sam’s reaction to it: jumping up and down in his seat, gasping, grabbing my hand, whispering, “Mommy, they’re going to be okay, right?” and then cheering at the end. Star Wars, as a thing, isn’t for just one person or one group of people, but I consider how people who were kids when the PT came out say without a hint of irony that it’s not that bad, because to them, that’s what Star Wars is and always has been. The joy of it isn’t just the OT but those three movies that were “meh” to those of us who cut our teeth on the OT only. And in a similar vein, the ST is full of that joy for kids now. Like holy moley, Sam and his best friend geeking out over seeing each other in Star Wars costumes at Halloween was just worth everything.

So in the end, like I concluded at the end of TLJ, the message here is that it’s for them. And also that there’s always hope, that ultimately, even when it seems the odds are against light, there’s more of us than there are of them. 

[nitewrighter]

(Serious question anon again!) if you could and wouldn't be opposed to it, how would you go about a Kyle Ron redemption arc/death? Should the path to redemption have started back in TFA with Han or during the climax of TLJ with the thing with Rey asking him to turn away?

I generally wouldn’t want a Kyle Ron redemption arc because it would just be a weak anime prettyboy retread of Darth Vader. Like, I know there’s an “It’s like poetry, it rhymes” aspect of Star Wars and I know TFA was very similar to “A New Hope,” but I think any new film trilogy has a responsibility to bring something new to the table--which I know is difficult considering Star Wars itself works very archetypally, but just look at the Mandalorian! Every episode is basically a sci-fi remix of a famous Western plot, but it’s incredibly compelling and fresh-feeling. Plus, TFA came with the promise of a new and very compelling trio with Finn and Rey and Poe, so I mostly felt that the retreading of A New Hope’s grounds in that movie was just to establish it as “yes, this is still Star Wars.” I really did think the death of Han was establishing, “Oh you THOUGHT Kylo was a sad fucked up and cruel-but-vulnerable prettyboy, but guess what! He’s a patricidal fascist asshole!!” Like the Death of Han was meant to be the distinguishing point between the three trilogies.

As far as a potential redemption arc goes, I wouldn’t have him fucking murder Han in TFA. Like, for Luke that was the point of no return and his father was also a space fascist--not Cool General Outlaw Dad like Han. Redemption was literally being held up to Kylo on a silver platter with Han and he stabbed him. I feel like Han still has to die in TFA, because he’s the Mentor Figure in that movie and the Mentor Figure always dies at the beginning of a new trilogy, but like... Maul killed Qui-Gon in The Phantom Menace... so why not Hux or Phasma or fucking Snoke kill Han to actually establish the First Order as a threat? Hell, you could have brought in the Knights of Ren back in the first movie and elevated one of them to occupy Kylo’s role once Kylo defected. You know... actually establish villains other than Kylo??? THEN MAYBE YOU WOULDN’T HAVE TO DRAG PALPATINE OUT OF THE GRAVE IN THE THIRD MOVIE!?

 If Kylo went with Rey in TLJ and didn’t opt to become Supreme Leader... maybe you could have a funny, awkward “hey, Zuko here” thing going in the third movie? But again, he killed Han. And Leia felt that shit. And also that interrogation scene was creepy and rapey as fuck. So like.... I don’t know how JJ Abrams thought any Star Wars fan would think Kylo’s ass was redeemable or romanceable at any point unless they’re like... a True Crime Community freak photoshopping flower crowns on serial killers. So yeah. If you wanted Kylo to be a redeemable character, don’t have him fucking kill Han. Kylo killing Han is different from Vader killing Obi-Wan. Like, when Vader killed Obi-Wan, Obi-Wan wasn’t established by three fucking movies yet, because Star Wars started with episode 4. So like, it was just your typical, “Aw the Mentor Figure Dies” trope. And look, I am absolutely in the “Ewan MacGregor was a fucking fantastic Obi-Wan” camp so like, I do have an emotional attachment to Obi-Wan, but also Han Solo has been an established and beloved Star Wars character for fucking 40 years, and there’s a difference between Obi-Wan buying time for Luke and company and Han legitimately trying to bring Kylo back to the light for Leia’s sake. It was for Leia’s sake that Luke went apeshit in his confrontation with Vader in ROTJ.

 So like... yeah, if you had literally anyone else in the first order kill Han (I recommend a Knight of Ren so they aren’t such dumb additions in the third movie) you might be able to give Kylo a redemption arc.

[cityofangelshqs]

members and admins current mw? any fandom is fine!

we would love to see: archie andrews, fp jones, donna sweett, bret weaston wallis, alice cooper, (riverdale), roger parslow, will parry from his dark materials, simon lewis, jonathan morgenstern, isabelle lightwood from shadowhunters, clarke griffin from the 100, odin, hela, frigga, bruce banner, clint barton, pietro maximoff, may parker from marvel, selina kyle, bruce wayne, damian wayne, tim drake, helena bertinelli, cassandra cain, renee montoya, the batfam from dc comics; mg, penelope park, alaric saltzman, rafael whaite, sebastian from legacies, damon salvatore, bonnie bennett from the vampire diaries, elijah mikaelson, hayley marshall-kenner from the originals, ben solo/kylo ren, han solo, ahsoka tano, obi-wan kenobi, general hux, obi-wan kenobi from star wars, bill denbrough, mike hanlon, stan uris, eddie kaspbrak from stephen king’s it, crow daddy from doctor sleep, bran stark, rickon stark, rhaegar targaryen, lord varys, samwell tarly, oberyn martell from game of thrones, kristoff, aladdin and jasmine from disne, the rest of the scream cast, more people from ahs! just to name a few! members, feel free to let the anon know if you have any other mw!

[theshijlegacy]

Rise of Skywalker ramblings

Saw RoS last night and loved it. 

I’d seen the mixed reviews and was a bit apprehensive going in, but was pleasantly surprised in a lot of ways.  It kept some of the spirit of TLJ that I liked while still delivering a lot of the “safer” Star Wars story that I expected.  Being part of a super enthusiastic opening night crowd is always fun too.  And it’s nice to see that I’m not the only person who liked the whole 7-8-9 trilogy!

Spoileriffic thoughts below.

--Rey Palpatine was one of the theories I’d kicked around, but it would have been nice if she really was nobody, like the Force doesn’t care who you’re related to. Timeline-wise she would have been better off as his great-granddaughter but I completely buy Sheev having lots of kids and/or having some later in life.

--I’d been running with the “Skywalker is the new name for Force user” theory for a while, but I’m OK with Rey adopting it as her last name.  She doesn’t have to be a Palpatine and the name of the family that saved the galaxy is continuing.

--HOLY CRAP FINN IS FORCE SENSITIVE.  I would love it if that was what he wanted to tell Rey.  (Best answer from Reddit: “I’m in love with Poe and don’t know how to tell him!”)

--Ben Solo didn’t make it to the end!  I was convinced he’d get a redemption arc and live happily ever after. Props to JJ/whoever for going in that direction, especially with the Jedi fadeout.

--The opening crawl getting right to "oh hey the emperor isn't really dead.” So happy they didn't drag out the “when-do-we-see/hear-the-emperor???” mystery

--Sheev Palpatine and his motherfucking contingencies for contingencies, plans-within-plans shit.  This guy was a thousand steps ahead of everyone else, all the time.  Got a glimpse of that in Empire’s End too.

--LOL the tank of Snoke clones.  Sheev loves his clones, in both canon and legends!

--Poe’s lightspeed skipping.  Poe being an ex-spice runner.  Poe and Zorii!  Poe in general.  Poe is great.

--Luke/Leia training flashback!!  Leia's lightsaber!!!!  Which she presumably built herself!!!!!

--3-way Finn/Poe/Rey hug.  And the sound of a thousand fanfics being composed…

--More First Order defectors who had been kidnapped as children.  (Also a plot point in Empire’s End, complete with a 6-year-old-ish Armitage Hux ordering around a group of kidnapped-and-brainwashed child recruits)

--Hux being the mole, not because he agrees with the resistance, but because he hates Kylo Ren.  I bet he was hatching a plan as soon as Snoke was killed.

--Force-healing onscreen!  And it wasn’t just “Force magic” (which I also would have been OK with), it was actual taking life from one to give to another.

--Rey was noticeably better at lightsaber fighting.  She was… not great in TFA.  Only slightly better in TLJ.  Her year of training really shows and I like that we’ve seen a pretty clear progression.

--Rey stopping that transport with some Kyle Katarn shit and Kylo trying to get it back and OH SHIT REY SHOT OUT FORCE LIGHTNING  

--Palpatine: GLADoS edition has been added to my recent “horrifying scene that works but really gives me the creeps” list (also includes flashback to Coulson resuscitation/brain surgery with him repeating “just let me die” on Agents of SHIELD, Brainy getting rebooted on Supergirl)

--Aside from his GLADoS-esque support arm complete with wires, I liked undead-Palpatine's look - missing fingers, whited-out eyes, and his transformation after he stole life from Rey & Kylo.  Especially the red-lined robes.

--Got serious Endgame vibes at the end with all the ships showing up. Husband unit also pointed out the parallel of “I am inevitable”/”I am Iron Man” and “I am all Sith”/”I am all Jedi”

--OMG ALL THE JEDI SPEAKING TO REY.  I didn’t recognize everything at first but I heard Obi-Wan (young & old), Yoda, Mace Windu, Ahsoka(!!!!!), and Anakin.  Per the credits, voices also included Qui-Gon(!), Luminara Unduli, Aayla Secura, Adi Gallia, and Kanan Jarrus(!!!!!).  Two notable absences: Cal Kestis and Ezra Bridger.  I can accept Cal’s fate as TBD since Fallen Order just came out, but this is really good news for Ezra.  I am now super super interested to see where these two have been.

--Kept the Rey/Kylo force-connection deal.  It weirded me out in TLJ but I’m really glad it was kept here.

--Wedge coming back for one last ride!  (and aging pretty well, wow)

--RIP Snap.  :-( I’d grown a bit attached to him after the Aftermath trilogy, but I think Norra and Brentin would have been proud.

-- ForceGhost!Luke has a new attitude; I guess being dead for a while tends to mellow you out.  I am still 100% OK with his character in this trilogy.

--Kylo not being as good at fighting after he dropped the dark-side allegiance – specifically the 6v1 fight against the Knights of Ren before he got the lightsaber.  Like he'd been into it so deep for so long he forgot how to fight without it.

--Han coming back one last time for some Ghost Dad Advice

--THANKS FOR NOT KILLING CHEWIE!!  I was seriously worried

--Rey fights herself!

--Where can I buy a replica of that Sith wayfinder?  I do like shiny force-user crystals/holocrons/etc

--Rey finally builds her own lightsaber!  And it’s yellow.

--TAKE THAT REYLOS: Oh you want a kiss huh?  There’s your kiss!  AND NOW HE’S DEAD.

--That whole scene.  Kylo staring at dead Rey.  Kylo force-healing Rey and bringing her back to life.  And now they’re staring at each other, and I’m thinking don’t kiss you idiots, don’t fucking do it.  FUCK they did.  I actually booed out loud.  (I will not deny being a little bit happy that Kylo died immediately after)

--All of the “are you happy Ep 7 & 8 haters???” stuff: Rey is super powerful because she’s Palpatine’s granddaughter, someone bringing up a “why don’t we Holdo this” argument and getting shot down with good reason, showing Leia’s Force powers with a flashback to being trained by Luke AND having her own lightsaber

--The urgent timeline got kind of.. muddled?  Forgotten?  They had 18 hours or 12 and still had time for all those spacejumps and Lando gathering friends from all over?

--A bit too on-the-nose with some of the ROTJ parallels.  Lando in disguise saving the day on a desert planet! Speeder bike chase!  Emperor taunting Our Hero while their friends are losing a huge battle outside!  A Skywalker dies so Our Hero can live!

--Also wondered if one of the writers played SWTOR: Emperor who really isn’t dead uses Super Mega Force Lightning and tries to jump into Our Hero’s body to take over their mind.

After chewing on this for a day, here’s my ranking of Skywalker/Palpatine saga films from best to worst:

5 > 8 > 9 > 4 > 7 > 6 > 3 > 2 > 1

And including Solo and Rogue One:

5 > Rogue One > 8 > 9 > 4 > 7 > 6 > 3 > Solo > 2 > 1

tbh I’m so far into the “inject all Star Wars content directly into my veins pls” territory that I can’t say I hate any of it, and even the cringiest prequel moments are leaps and bounds ahead of a lot of other junk I’ve watched/read/played.  So much about Star Wars is just FUN, and I will gladly handwave away most of my nitpicks (SpeedForce, I ain’t gotta explain shit) for the sake of enjoying the story.  Even the ridiculous stuff that I poke fun at is still a part of the whole mess; it can’t all be great or even good or OK and that is fine with me.  [NOTE: I have not watched the Holiday Special but the husband unit is weirdly enthusiastic about me doing so; it may happen yet this year.] 

I really like this comment from the A.V. Club.  More cynical than my overall take on the whole shebang but I totally know with where they’re coming from.  I don’t agree with all the responses but it’s a pretty good discussion.

[claidi]

My take on Star Wars: Spoilers Ahead

Going into this, my expectations were low. I heard it was low rated, had too many things going on, and was too safe. Well, since the previous movie kinda killed my investment in this trilogy anyway I wasn't to concerned. I figured it'd be a good spectacle and I wanted to be in on the conversation around it.

After sitting through a long span of trailers and an epilepsy warning the music kicks in. The opening scroll starts and I... I start losing it.

"The dead speak!" That's the first thing someone decided I needed to to experience. Palpatine is back and here to be the villain. I thought it'd be something revealed to the characters during the movie, a big dramatic moment. Instead, he's just back and who really needs to know why.

After that, the movie opens proper on a Kylo Ren tantrum. Just letting you know now, I'm not a fan of the Kyle. We get him tracking down Palps because apparently Kyle isn't enough of a villain to stand on his own in even the first minute of screentime. Inexplicably Snoke is revealed to be a clone / science experiment or something and ol' Palps has behind everything all along. It's so gloriously cheesy I can't help but laugh at every new revelation.

After that we finally get to our heroes. It's kinda fun to see our leads actually interacting like they're close to each other. A spy is mentioned and automatically I know it's gonna be Hux which amuses me once more, given I walked out of the last movie fairly certain that he'd be plotting Kyle's death if any justice was given to his character.

I have mixed feelings about Rey training with Leia. On one hand, I love me some Leia. On the other hand, I'm worried that was added just to give Rey credentials and stop the whiners who complain the main character of a Star Wars movie is too over powered... But it's fun when Rey's friends get back with the Plot and we get some trio interaction for once. Didn't like that the Kyle force Skype calls are still a thing but whatever, it's time to save the universe in 16 hours!

Speaking of Kyle, when he fixes his helmet I read the red sections as burning hot metal at first and thought he was actually burning his face to wear the thing for the drama. The fact he actually used like red hot glue or something is even more hilarious tho.

We get an adventure to find a knife which shows more plot threads, that Rey can Force heal, Finn has something to tell her, and the most ridiculous tug of war match is ended by a little lightning. It's pretty clear what Rey's newly retconned family situation is shaping up to be and someone is gonna be deathly wounded for her to heal. Meanwhile I guess Finn probably tells Rey he has the force in some deleted scene I guess because even when it comes back up it's never properly resolved...

We have some flirts with character death. It's kinda hilarious actually. They aren't even played out for drama as they're resolved fairly quickly. Meanwhile Rey's plot has pretty much just become her Skype calls to Kyle. They keep talking about why Rey didn't "take his hand." I know what they mean but I just keep cracking up because my brain just adds "in marriage" after that. Seriously, it works as Kyle whining about "why don't you liiiiike me?????" but eventually he drops the bomb on her parents identities a second time. Like seriously, why do they keep having Kyle do this? Is it his job? Like Vader revealed Luke's parentage, Kyle must update Rey on hers to live up to him? It's especially delightful how Rey's Palpatiness told, dancing on the base story given last movie as it retcons it away.

Oh yes, Rey's parents were nobodies. It's her grandpa who's the important one! XD

I can't make this up.

So like I know this *said* Rey was sold to protect her but like... Is the drinking money still canon as well? Cause that was never directly addressed. Was is a 2 for 1 deal? Protect daughter and have credits for booze before zombiebot Palpatine's cult kills you? I just... The keeping half of it and glossing over the rest is as funny as Kyle just randomly knowing the "wrong" past last movie.

Also I don't want to know why Palpatine had a son. I'm just saying he was a science experiment and moving on because I do Not like the alternative.

The heroes continue the quest. Rey keeps getting isolated from the group. Finn meets a new friend I half expected to be revealed as his sister because it's been that kind of movie. Like seriously, there was even a scene where Kyle strangled someone criticizing the Sith as some mystic cult to harken back to a New Hope. It would have been on brand.

Rey finds the plot mcguffin. Fights herself. Kyle shows up from literally nowhere. They fight so the special effects team can practice their water effects. Leia dies to say Kyle's name for some reason and this turns him good?

Well whatever it's just about climax time!

Rey has a brief detour where Luke Skywalker tells her that maybe hiding on a porg filled planet isn't the answer. We find Leia got Jedi training but put it aside seeing that it would lead to her son death. That's just... Really something in hindsight. But regardless, Rey's on her way to fight Palps with two lightsabers and the resistance at her back.

Now the real fun part! Palpatine! A Sith choir! Lightning! A ridiculous soulmate plot that I'm wondering was poached from a probably better written fic!

I love that it's supposed to be a shock that Palpatine wanted Rey alive. Like I was confused when he claimed the opposite. This is the villain who is evil for the lolz. He doesn't think anyone could truly bring him down, no matter the power he thinks himself on step ahead. And yes! Gloriously yes! Palpatine is seriously written from pieced together memes. He is nothing but "dew it" and "the dark side has many powers some would call unnatural" and "strike me down with your hatred!"

He's a zombie robot thing who's been behind everything. He has these super duper stardestroyers that all have death star lasers and lightning powers so strong he can... Temporarily disrupt all the electronics on a fleet of ships? Like it's not enough to actually kill anyone just pause the battle I guess? Oh but he has ALL the Sith in him and whoever kills him then gets possessed as well. And he can heal himself by sucking energy from Rey and Kyle's extra special soulmate bond. And he has a choir backing up his evil sith ways.

It's so over the top.

I can't take it seriously.

And I think that's my review.

It's hilarious, ridiculous, and I didn't take anything seriously. It's great for a laugh.

We get scenes like Chewie finally getting a medal. Anakin Skywalker's lightsaber being buried in the Tatooine sand. A resurrection. We get a bunch of joke theories thrown in a blender and given a budget. Critically speaking this is a mess. Speaking as me it was a cracktastic laughfest.

[ao3feed--kylux]

The Adventures Of Emo Gay, Nerd Gay, Tired Lesbian and Their Nice Counterparts (And Rose)

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/31T1UGt

by Unoriginal_Fangirl

A chatfic with Kyle, Armie, Phas, Ray, Flynn, Damneron and Rosie

Can't guarantee quality Just like the movies i took the characters from

Words: 1351, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/F, Gen, M/M

Characters: Armitage Hux, Kylo Ren, Phasma (Star Wars), Poe Dameron, Finn (Star Wars), Rey (Star Wars), Rose Tico

Relationships: Armitage Hux/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Poe Dameron/Finn, Phasma/Rey (implied)

Additional Tags: Chatting & Messaging, Armitage Hux Has Feelings, Armitage Hux Being An Asshole, Lesbian Phasma, College Student Rey (Star Wars), Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, id say ooc but these characters have 0 characterization so its fine, its just a chatfic guys, rose runs an anon ig, poe rly wants to become a pilot and phasma is Tired of her classmates, a lot of reylo bashing btw, kyle & rey are both gay, theyre all gay, everyones gay

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/31T1UGt

[zuckergussprinzessin]

here are some things I particularly liked and disliked, in no particular order (spoilers obv)

thanks I hate it:

that FUCKING KISS that went on FOREVER

like jesus christ you could have given that half the time you did

possibly it would still have been too long

I accept it!!! I accept that this happened! and I am okay with how it happened!

but for fuck’s sake

anyway

Did We Mention Poe Dameron Is Into Girls Today. Are You Sure You Got That. Let’s Just Point That Out Again.

wow it sure took Kyle Ron about... five seconds? to turn?

so much death and devastation holy shit

like I may have to recycle my alternative title for Rogue One (”Mostly Wars, Partially Stars”) for the rest of the sequel trilogy 

that was some clumsy ass storytelling just overall

what was the deal with retconning everyone’s background story? Poe was a spice runner suddenly? and I am like 70% sure the story would have worked pretty much the same without Rey being a Palpatine

like I don’t mind her being a Palpatine but that was like. obviously worked in later.��“oh yeah when I said they were nothing I meant like. they were hiding who they really were” srsly? no.

speaking of Palpatine, I just wanna point out that Sheev’s course of action makes no sense whatsoever? I’m gonna rewatch this and see if I can find some logic in there but. so far I don’t see any.

things I am unexpectedly okay with:

Hux did not die by Kylo’s hand, but I mostly wanted that bc it would mean that Kyle cares like. a little bit at least.

Rey is not nobody after all, but apart from the point I made in the above list I frankly just don’t care. Whatever. She chooses who to be in the end. Which is kind of the point of Star Wars, I feel.

welp I guess Reylo happened. but just for like a minute. and then he died! I’m fine with this.

yes good:

scrunchy face Rey!

smiling Ben!

FORCE SENSITIVE FINN FUCKING CONFIRMED!!!

the deserter Stromtroopers! <3 

Leia’s lightsaber aaaaahhhhhh

the KoR were not entirely wasted? like only maybe 70% 

Hux telling Kylo “good job” on the mask lmao

Poe’s reaction to Hux revealing himself as the spy

a much better use of the wonderful March Of The Resistance than in TFA

on that note, the dramatic triumphant reprise of Rey’s Theme as she faces off with Palps

that lightsaber handoff tho :D

all of Rey and Kyle’s fights, both the Force Bond fight against each other and the parallel final battle. that was some cool shit.

but also

REY STABBING KYLO REN WITH HIS OWN DAMN LIGHTSABER HOT DAMN THAT’S MY GIRL

Landoooooo <3

“they’re not using Speeders” cmoa

the ending on Tatooine

group hug with Finn and Poe is holding Rey’s hand!!!!!

they were holding hands you guys!

while hugging Finn!

I feel God in this cinema tonight

[denimsnake]

Star Wars asks! 6, 7, 10, 14, 15, and 19 👀

6 was answered here and 7 & 10 were answered here

14) fight

favorite: ahsoka vs vader in rebels (AAAAAAAAAHHHH) but also obi-wan vs anakin on mustafar

least favorite: yoda vs sheev i just don’t care about it lmao

15) line of dialogue

favorite: “i don’t care if you win. i need kylo ren to lose.” go OFF hux

least favorite: “i’m the spy” aksdfjkds yes hux gets both of these…the duality of man

19) outfit

favorite: poe’s indiana jones outfit in tros………everything padme ever wore but ESPECIALLY her white combat outfit in episode 2………….leia’s bounty hunter disguise……..the robe hux wears in the phasma novel bc it’s objectively hilarious that he discusses his father’s murder in a robe

least favorite: kyle’s pjs at the end of tros jkdfjkadjkfajdk did he just wake up from a nap or what

star wars fave/least fave

[ao3feed-stormpilot]

The Adventures Of Emo Gay, Nerd Gay, Tired Lesbian and Their Nice Counterparts (And Rose)

by Unoriginal_Fangirl

A chatfic with Kyle, Armie, Phas, Ray, Flynn, Damneron and Rosie

Can't guarantee quality Just like the movies i took the characters from

Words: 1351, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/F, Gen, M/M

Characters: Armitage Hux, Kylo Ren, Phasma (Star Wars), Poe Dameron, Finn (Star Wars), Rey (Star Wars), Rose Tico

Relationships: Armitage Hux/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Poe Dameron/Finn, Phasma/Rey (implied)

Additional Tags: Chatting & Messaging, Armitage Hux Has Feelings, Armitage Hux Being An Asshole, Lesbian Phasma, College Student Rey (Star Wars), Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, id say ooc but these characters have 0 characterization so its fine, its just a chatfic guys, rose runs an anon ig, poe rly wants to become a pilot and phasma is Tired of her classmates, a lot of reylo bashing btw, kyle & rey are both gay, theyre all gay, everyones gay

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/31T1UGt