#time for my wife to die
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#columbo#season 9#rest in peace mrs columbo#i've seen things you people wouldn't believe#a guy who fried his uncle with a hand mixer#i watched a scientist go mad with laughter hanging several hundred feet off the ground#all those moments will be lost in time like tears in the rain#time for my wife to die
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i fear we moved on too quickly from the fact that agatha only said rio’s name once in the entire series and it was the most throwaway line ever
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#I’m still at this restaurant#i will literally die on this hill I’m so upset over it STILL#“that’s what got rio all in a tizzy’’ YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS#do you realise how hard i screamed when I heard her say it only to realise it was THE ONLY TIME EVER#why could she not say her goddamn name#she couldn’t even say it to nicky#my mum taught me not to call people ‘she’ so WHY IS AGATHA GOING AROUND CALLING HER WIFE ‘SHE’#agatha all along#agatha harkness#Rio Vidal#agathario
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May I offer you a hastily drawn picture to wish you a good get-through-the-week? :3
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HELLO ??????? HELLO hot gluing this to my eyes IMMEDIATELY thank you so much i feel myself becoming stronger already
#fave#'snap i thought you were sleeping' i am not immune to notifications AND I AM REWARDED GREATLY#snap chats#that parks and rec meme You Know The One i havent stopped staring at this for the past five hours <- its been twenty minutes#PLEAAASSE this is so cute omg thank you so much .... ill cherish this until i die and even then ill continue to cherish it in death#PRECISELY the vision i had earlier you get it ......... im OBSESSED#will have to save this to my phone and refer to it like a sailor lost at sea missing his wife#BOTH wives even .... woAh ......#i dont wanna post this cause i just wanna keep lookign at it whenever i open my inbox. like i need this stapled In My Inbox#we'll do the next best thing il'l print it once i can ....... motivation to not fumble these next few weeks and life tbh#AAA THANK YOU AGAIN MY FRIEND for ALL you do. i STILL have to check the drive you updated i saw that vjLEKJEAJ#a morning endeavor surely ..... for now i bid you good night and a heart Thank You for the nineteenth time !!!!!!!!!#I JUST KEEP SCROLLING BACK UP TO LOOK AT IT PLEAAAASSSEEE ok im gonna sleep FOR REAL NOW#GOOD NIGHT and thank you once more !!!!!! i love it sm .......
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Eddie struggling and Venom panicking.
#symbrock#venom the last dance#venom 3 spoilers#worried wife mode activated#i love that you can feel every time Eddie is in danger it's not 'oh no my host might die' but 'oh no my Eddie might die'#I just KNOW that symbiote is screaming inside
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@cokoweee
Ya’ll ever have a dream so lifelike it feels aggressively real until one thing goes a little too wrong and then you start to realize that maybe you’re in a dream but it’s also too real to convince yourself it’s not real that you can’t wake yourself up?
TW: panic attack, I say gun, uhhh blood ig? Bishop says a kinda weird thing but that's just him bein him
can I say blood? last time I did it marked me as mature...
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Her heart thumped against her chest, lactic acid building in her legs as she ran. She tapped furiously at her phone, fingers slipping over the screen as she tried to deploy Sheldon.
Donnie says “no no no” chimed a pixilated picture of Othello, his finger waving back and forth.
“What the-” She slammed against a wall, her shoulder crunching against the brick.
His stupid programming on the poor thing to keep Sheldon at his house. Maybe she could override it?
No, not enough time. She was just going to have to run and hope for the best.
Her shoulder screamed in protest as she climbed the ladder in the alley. Scrambling over the side of the building to catch her breath, she tapped at the screen again.
There had to be something she could do to foil his programming. She wiped at her nose, the cold still not quite gone even after days of bed rest. Bullets flew over the edge of the building, seemingly locking on to her body heat. Throwing herself at the ledge at the last second to force the bullets to crash into the wall she coughed violently, phlegm coating her throat.
Stupid sickness.
Stupid Othello leaving her with the stupid rabbit farmer.
She pushed herself off the ground, arms struggling under the weight of herself. It was as if every muscle in her body was on fire, each fiber screaming at her to stop. She gulped raising her head over the ledge. Agent Bishop was standing on the adjacent rooftop, his face curled into a sneer, eyes unblinking despite the sun in his eyes.
He waved at her, fingers waggling in the air as he pulled a small gun from his pocket. Aiming it directly at her chest he grinned, his eyes flickering with something distinctly unhuman.
She stumbled backward, her feet skidding over the concrete as he seemed to lock onto her. Loose rock dug into her knees as she clambered over the rooftop.
Away.
All she needed to do was get away.
She placed a hand over her stomach, feeling the raised bump of the scar, as she moved.
This was…
This was wrong?
It didn’t happen this way.
No. She didn’t need to get away, she needed to get out.
The bullet ripped into her skin, tearing away at muscle, and shattering the bone in her rib.
She screamed, blood pouring from the gaping hole in her chest, as Bishop moved closer. He walked to her side, footsteps clanking against the concrete.
Clawing at the ground she dragged her body along the roof, rocks digging under her nails. Bishop laughed, his foot trampling her hand, digging it into the ground. She gasped, breathing shallowly as she fought to get loose.
He grabbed her hair, wrapping it between his fingers and tightening his grip as he pulled her from the floor.
“Oh, this is wonderful.” He smiled, voice dripping with venom. “Such a pretty little thing I caught this evening. I’ve been dying to chat with you.” He pulled her hair up, forcing her to rise. “I wonder if she’ll do any tricks?”
She spat in his face, her ears filled with an all-consuming ringing.
Away.
She needed to get away.
It didn’t matter how. She needed to get away.
He said something else, flaunting some sort of mechanism he had hidden in his shirt. She tried to focus on his words, but her breathing was too shallow, her limbs too shaky, the ringing too loud for her to hear a word.
She clamped a hand over her chest, a sorry attempt to staunch the flow of blood from the gaping hole in her body. Cursing softly she watched as the red seeped into a slithering pink fleshy mass.
She stifled a scream as the pink turned an orange maroon, her own blood fueling some sort of monster.
“Shhhhhhh.” Bishop whispered against her ear, “It’ll be done soon. Just one quick slash and you’ll be out of my hair for good.”
The mass jumped forward, faster than she could comprehend, her body spasming in pain as she scrambled back.
Was this the Krang she’d heard so much about after she’d left the jail? Weren’t they supposed to be mindless or something?
It lunged forward again, tentacles lashing toward her face. Bishop shook her in front of him, like a toy for a dog.
“Kendra?”
She screamed as he tightened his grip on her, shaking her around like a bag of flour. The world around her turned hazy, her vision blurring in and out.
She wasn’t going to go out without a fight.
Throwing her head back she jammed her skull into his chin, breaking the grip he had on her hair.
She clawed at the ground, a strange silky feeling coating her fingers. Pushing away the softness of what was sure to be Krang, she kicked at the mass as it wiggled unnaturally.
“KENDRA!” A familiar voice shouted at her, a gentle three-fingered nubby touch against her arm.
Her eyes flew open, arms flailing to the sides to swat at what was left of the Krang matter, as hands held her back. She gasped, her chest heaving as a sinking feeling hit her gut. Dread splashed over her head like a wave, drowning her, leaving nothing but fear.
Eyes widening she looked next to her for Tello, horrified as darkness encroached on her vision, leaving her staring through a pin hole. Nausea rolled through her stomach as she gasped for air, her chest shuddering to keep up with her breathing.
It hurt. It hurt so bad.
“Hey, hey, hey.” He whispered, hand placed against her back. “It’s ok you’re home. You’re with me.”
She jerked backward. He was loud. So so loud. Even with the ringing in her ears, he was too loud.
Breaths were punched from her lungs faster than she could finish taking them in. Tears streamed down her face as her eyes blew wide. Her chest tightened, lungs twisting as she shook.
She’s dying. She has to be dying. There’s no other explanation.
Dead in her room from a nightmare-induced heart attack,
Her eyes flickered back and forth over the room, not focusing on anything, just wildly scanning for danger she knew wasn’t there. Willing her arm to move, she let out a chocked warble.
The room seemed to melt around her. Things blurred together, a fuzzy abstract painting of almost-real-life. Sweat beaded on her forehead as she tightened her muscles.
Her whole body shook as she tried to take steadying breaths.
“Did you know softshell turtles only have half a plastron?”
She was in the middle of dying.
She most definitely did not need turtle facts right now.
“Technically a full one, but it’s covered by skin, rendering it effectively useless for plastron purposes.” He shrugs. “Same deal as the shell.”
She looked at him, confusion breaking through the panic.
“Makes us really flexible though. Wanna see?”
He got off the bed, walked to the middle of the room, and bent backward. He smiled upside down at her from the floor and smoothly brought himself back up.
“Pretty neat huh?” He waggled his eyebrows. “Bet no other turtle you meet could do that.”
Amusement rippled through her as she watched him demonstrate his stretches and various yoga poses.
“I’ve never met another turtle like you.” She breathed, some of the panic melting away.
“Precisely! No one can do it like me!” He said, pointing his finger at her triumphantly before his face softened. “ We starting to feel a bit better?”
She brought her thumb and pointer finger close together. A little
He nodded. “Am I good to come back up or do you need some space?”
She patted the bed next to her, inviting him closer. She waited until he was seated comfortably before slumping against his shoulder, exhausted.
He shifted slightly, reaching for his phone with one hand, the other wrapped around her. He let them sit for a moment, reminding her to breathe every few seconds before Sheldon zipped into the room.
He whispered something to Othello before zooming out of the room. She watched passively as it happened, her body still not quite connected to her soul.
Sheldon returned moments later, a bag of ice, a bottle of water, a cookie, and tub of lavender lotion in his little propeller arms.
Othello took them from him, patted his head, and shooed him away. Taking one of the ice cubes he flattened out her hand and placed it in her palm.
She jerked slightly at the sensation of cold in her hand, surprised when he placed another in her palm.
“Focus on the melting.” He said, voice low and gentle.
The ice filled the lines of her hand and dripped over the sides and down her arm. She shivered as the water pooled in her hand. Othello grabbed the cookie from the pile he had created and broke off half to give to her.
“Thanks?”
He watched her carefully. “What does it taste like?”
“A cookie?” She said through a mouthful, her hands still full of TV static.
“I need details.” He pressed.
She paused, taking a moment to consider the flavors in her mouth. “Vanilla, chocolate chips.” She took another bite. “ Like I left it in the oven a minute or two too long and overcooked them just slightly.”
She’d have to make another batch, this time keeping an eye on the time.
He pressed an uncapped water bottle into her hand. “Drink.”
She pressed the bottle to her lips, feeling the way the cold blossomed against her skin as she held it there. Quietly observing the way she could feel it go down her throat and into her stomach.
“Are we feeling more alive?”
She nodded, running her hand along her thigh to feel the fabric of her pajama pants as she pressed her head against his side.
“Good.” He murmured, sleep creeping into his voice. “You had a panic attack I’m pretty sure.”
“...Sorry it was for something stupid.”
“I get worked up over stupid stuff too.” He mumbled, eyes half closed.
“Your stuff isn’t stupid.” She countered.
“Then neither is yours.”
She stopped, lifting her head to look up at him.
He grabbed her hand, flexing the fingers for her. “You feel ok?”
“I don’t know.” She answered honestly.
He nodded and guided her to a lying position. “Tell me five of your favorite things.”
She paused, looking around the room. “Hmmmmm. You.”
“Thank you.”
“Mhm. Uhhh, lavender. The color purple. Satin jackets. Baking. Messing around in the lab. Oh, I guess that’s more than five.”
He tapped her shoulders rhythmically, “You can keep going if you need to.”
She took in a deep breath. “I think I’m ok now.”
“Positive?”
Nodding she pulled the blankets over herself. What she really needed was rest. She was so exhausted from the whole ordeal that the idea of doing anything else felt impossible.
He got off the bed again, searching beneath the bedframe for something before he pulled a large purple blanket from under the bed. She blinked in surprise as he placed it over her, a weight holding her down to the bed.
“I should’ve mentioned it was weighted.”
She pulled her hand out to give a quick thumbs up as he climbed back into bed. She shifted to hold out her arm for a hug. He smiled and pulled her close, wrapping his arm around her waist.
“You smell like you’ve been using my soap.” She grumbled against his plastron.
He shrugged. “ I like the way you smell.”
Rolling her eyes she tugged the blanket higher over her shoulders smiling as soft chirping filled the room, the sound he always made right as he fell asleep.
“Good night Tello.” She whispered.
His plastron vibrated as he churred back, gently running circles through her hair.
She was home. And she was safe.
~
squad don't write stuff at four AM I'm pretty sure this only makes sense to me at this point. Anyway I was listening to my pretty princess playlist while writing this 💁♀️
the reason why this was written is in the tags btw
#Me and my friend were hanging out and she got all excited when I told her I was minoring in creative writing#she asked for me to read me some of my stuff and I agreed LIKE AN IDOIT#well i open my docs and low and behold it's what I posted yesterday#mind you that doc is titled ugly sewer man and his pretty wife#i scroll before she can see the title but at this point I have to read this one#its too late for me to exit the doc without me being suspicious#I read it and she's all like “Well butter my backside and call me a biscuit I forgot you wrote but you do a pretty dang good job!”#I'm just sweating bullets coz I just read her my fanfic of Donatello the ninja turtle and Kendra the dragon chick#she'll never know and I'll never tell her that she was read kendratello fanfic with the names and some of the words replaced#its worth it to say that this isn't the first time that this has happened with her#last time it was the freaking really long one with Leo dying dead and Don also trying to die dead#i went home and cooked myself some pasta to recover because wtf was that#and I was so upset by the situation that instead of sleeping I wrote more kendratello fanfic?#pee pee poo poo#caca dodo even#FOUR AM BABY AND IM STILL HEREEEEEE#Ya'll also got some free stuff to use to help a hommie out if they ever start having a panic attack#tapping method will work on yourself as well if you start feeling freaked out or not in your body.#just cross your arms over your torso and put your left hand on your right shoulder and vice versa tapping your shoulders one at a time#im sleepin now#gn yall#Paige writes
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moooore peter and norm swap stuff
I did not bring that up last post but the main idea was by @redtalics ^-^ yapping in tag. If you are curious. Hi
#space peter and factory norm in my dialtown? More than you think#norm at the plant fit so much just think about it man#And space peter???? Oh he gotta miss his family man#NOTE DESIGN wanted to make p much a alternative of both but wanted to keep much of their personality still going on.#Norm look like a florida dad#I still gave him his cowboy theme going on NOT as america much as his og is but still here#HES A HISTORY NERRRRD so he get to have that radio head. Radio. Head? Is he a creep? Is he a WEIRDO?#oh yeah tool belts instead of the whole guns n all thing going on :] he still big into america i think he'll be more about how Mingus care#About the plant and they just CANNOT fail to bring it back#peter as norm sound kinda random at first but if you think much... Yeah... Potential!#Instead of having a motivation of REVENGE he just want to get back into the past#NO matter the circumstance.#If peter at the factory sounded a bit crazy from time to time SO imagine 3 years in a forest missing your wife THE LIGHT OF HIS TUNNEL and#he kinda crazy but me think he a bit more saddy looking than usually norm always look angry#I GAVE him a axe as a alternative of the gun#The ending where you get axed and shit yourselfeand die#GINGI can motivate peter to stay in the present or to fuck around and keep him in that mindset like chapter 3 after all!#REALLY LIKE THE IDEA MY FRIEND ELLIOT MADE ABOUT HIM RIPPING OFF HIS AMERICA FLAG OUT OF ANGER#Hum I have more tobsay but i think thats enough. Tagging.#germa rambling for nothing#dialtown#dialtown fanart#dialtown phone dating sim#dialtown au#dialtown peter#dialtown norm#sgt norm allen
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Its you
#nightmaretheater#psychonauts#morceau oleander#coach oleander#<- hopefully it reads. Its kinda. You cant really see her you know…#gore cw#blood cw#Sorry i had to watch a video of rabbit butchery several times for refference you gotta see it too now sorry#he pulled the skin off that thing like it was fabric 😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅#anyways. Augghhn . Aughgjmgm hgGGH#OUUGHH..Starts cryinng really loudly#collapses on floor rolls around continues crying#has hesrt attack and dies#IM SO SORRY MY HORRIBLE WIFE#😢😢😢Uuwgwgahng g nebshhabendn fnabsjenhwhd#My only other thougjt: Huh that would make s good album cover#anyways time to collapse and die for like an hour#also apparently this took me 3 hours which i personally refuse to believe because HOW#also i did the rendering on one layer (scary)
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wowie zowie its been a while huh
coming here to say this blog is dead in the water, not deactivating it but i'm also not planning to use it again. been out of doing art for years at this point; been a lot of survival mode priorities and having to completely relearn how to talk to people again. things are good now but uhhhhh they historically have not been lol
not sure how active this site is anymore, but hope yall doin good out there! be safe, be well! ┗┃・ ■ ・┃┛
#honestly tempted to never post again becasue the last post is a hell of a way to go out#but also like . hiiii i didn't die i'm just making video games with my wife now#among other things#i don't post. im just a lurker. i lurk.#i see the old men are having a time on this site. good for them
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Someone write me a ShinRan fic that reads like a stereotypical shojo. Whether this takes place in canon or an au is optional. The only requirement is that Shinichi is cast where there is usually a girl, and Ran where a guy is.
#listen. I have mentioned before that Shinichi would die happy to be called Ran’s trophy wife. someone exploit that. I need it to be explored#I NEED it y’all#shin being all ‘omg she’s so cool’#shin religiously attends all her matches when Crime isn’t happening. he just about swoons every time.#pining. insufferable pining. Hattori can’t even tease Shinichi about it because he is That In Love#ran is nice and cute and also really cool and could bench press Shinichi like a stick. he may or may not want it to happen#‘ran senpai notice me!’ (they are in fact the same grade)#they each think the other is dating someone else at some point. the ‘love rivals’ turn out to be ran and Shinichi’s cousins who are dating#(it’s Kaito and Aoko)#LISTEN. RAN DOING THE KABEDON ON SHINICHI#MAKE IT HAPPEN FANDOM#MAKE IT HAPPEN#my writing#fanfiction prompt#prompt#dcmk#detective conan#detco#case closed#shinran#kudo shinichi#mouri ran#shojo manga#shojo anime#shojo tropes#shojo romance#shojo
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#dorohedoro#dorohedoro noi#drhdr#drhdr art#the wife of all time fr#the last thing I see before I die in my dreams#holds head in hands
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Just read Caleb's first anecdote and ngl he's so 🥹
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he's so silly 😭
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CalebMC before all this mess is so wholesome 😭 why must they suffer this angst
#MC making two cards reminded me of that meme going around about how a Lawyer's wife prepared two cakes for his bar exam#“Yay! I knew you'd pass” and another with “It's okay#there's still next time“#or something like that#love and deepspace#caleb love and deepspace#lads anecdotes#lads#caleb#poor baby went through so much#both of them#reading that part where caleb tries to write a letter thinking he's going go die but not having pen and paper on him#he's ALWAYS thought about MC#my baby#:((
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Taipei Black Butler Haul Feb 2025 :]
#my (admittedly not very impressive) haul#black butler#kuroshitsuji#ciel phantomhive#sebastian michaelis#soma asman kadar#edgar redmond#gregory violet#public school arc#that character stand is going to annoy the shit out of me whenever I have to reconnect the pieces.#it makes the most vile noise#I havent had a hyperfixation like this since I was 12 (and watching black butler seaosn 1 😅) what does one *do* with merch#my character stand is sitting on my desk so Ciel can judge me while I work#but I dont want to put the button on anything I use. because I keep breaking buttons and I think i would die if i broke one of these#but I dont want to put it somewhere i *dont* use because thats just sad.#choices 😔 they are so difficult when you're a whole adult woman with a serious job. and you're obsessed with the worst anime of all time#Forgive the cat hair btw. I wiped down my desk FOUR TIMES. before taking these photos. I can do nothing about it#yapping#I wonder if my wife is willing to go out looking for black butler stuff for me when the new season comes out.
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Go my scarabs. My bugs. My insects. My creatures. My my uh go go my carapacians goooooo gooooooooooooooooooooo
+my sondaugter
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#gibsonnilson#when I say I’m multifandom I’m multi fandom this time it’s homestuck unfortunately#AU where spades did not die and he live with his wife and still a jackass but idk man I miss spades#i love slick paint guys I#I miss slick paint#slickpaint#I love yuo slickpaint#this is rlly self indulgent so don’t mind that#homestuck#spades slick#ms paint#fanart#uhhhh fun fact abt this blog. did ya know the art tag is actually based on my two homestuck ocs names hahahahahaha#artists on tumblr
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Revisiting Bartimaeus tag first time in two years feels like coming home from a long journey tbh. Like, time pass by, and all the same faces will still be making memes and and laughing about similar scenes and all of this is so precision and something never changes and I love this sm I cannot describe this in words.
#bartimaeus#bartseq#hey guys do you...do you remember me....??/j#the Ukrainian copy of RoS is coming soon so SO#I have to reread it gosh my friend is reading it now our of my and bestie's honest recommendations and there's SO MANY SCENES#I sincerely forgot existing#I HAVE TO.#also the way everyone is still laughing about Nathaniel's jealous wife PG era is so dear to me something is forever something just stays#empiers might die and fall and the rise again and there will be bartseq fandom laughing about “man or woman” and think he rather knew anyway#all of this tied with clever political analysis and eternal love for Kitty Jones of course#How can I post about hmc and bartseq in the same time...and maybe some Macbeth poems If you may#cause I really want to#bartimaeus trilogy#bartimaeus sequence
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hi everyone…. kicks a rock…. greaseball drawn with butch flag colours…
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#how many times have i said this#i’m sorry to the ppl who followed me for other fandoms HELPPP#her gear may be inaccurate but i would rather die than CHEAT my colour palette.#ignore the filter on the drawing i thought it looked rlly cool because the final product was kinda boring#ok now these tags#i am greedy for reach….#stex#starlight express#stex london 2024#stex revival#greaseball starlight express#my wife❤️ i would die for u girlball
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mercy? mercy?
MY MERCY’S LONG SINCE DROWNED
IT DIED TO BRING ME HOME
#DUDE I CAN’T HANDLE THIS#I���VE LISTENED TO THIS SONG FOUR TIMES#I HAVENT FINISHED THE SAGA YET BECAUSE IM STUCK ON THIS ONE#epic the musical#the ithaca saga#AND AS LONG AS YOURE AROUND#MY FAMILYS FATE IS LEFT UNKNOWN#YOU PLOTTED TO KILL MY SON#YOU PLANNED TO RAPE MY WIFE#ALL OF YOU ARE GOING TO DIE#YOUVE FILLED MY HEART WITH HATE#ALL OF WHO HAVE DONE ME WRONG#THIS WILL BE YOUR FATE#guys#g u y s#holy fucking SHIT dude
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