#through some of my worst moments
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
citrlet · 7 months ago
Text
very sad this morning seeing Ryan and Shane leaving youtube to start yet another exclusive subscription service :/
17 notes · View notes
gods-perfect-idiots · 1 month ago
Text
Tumblr media
something something blood-soaked hands cradling your face something something
anyway here's the post btw
Tumblr media
#what if post dp3 logan struggles to emotionally accept that wade Will Actually For Real Survive Anything#and one time they are fighting some random baddies#and they somehow get in a few shots straight to wade's cranium and he drops like a bag of slutty slutty potatoes#and logan goes full berserker trying to get to him#like he just massacres everyone in his way and wade still isnt getting up ohnoohnoohnonotagainohno#(healing factor or no a few direct shots to the brain stem/t box take a bit to recover from)#(no more than five minutes but it's an eternity to logan)#and his heart sinks to the very core of the earth as he kneels down next to wade's body#and his hands are shaking and soaked in blood and he can't seem to sheathe his claws in his dazed adrenalined state#he tries to peel back wade's mask and fear is just *pounding* through his system because in that moment#all he can see are the xmen dead in massive pools of blood#and that feeling of unreality is rushing over him like thiscantbehappeningthiscantbehappeningnotagainohgodnotagain#wade's still and unresponsive and there is so Much BLOOD (hard to tell how much is Wade's and how much is just on his hands)#and logan doesn't even realize he's crying until suddenly wade's eyes light up like a computer restarting#and he's smiling and gasping and joking immediately#“well howdy there hot stuff what did I miss?”#and then he clocks that logan is Not Okay#“... well gee willikers golly goddamn peanut 'twas only a flesh wound! no need to go all waterworks over lil ol me”#“you know it would take a helluva lot more than that to make me shuffle off this here mortal coil!”#“see all better I'm hunky dory peachy keen right as fucking rain”#“I mean cmon I can't have been out for more than five minutes so let's just go back to you being exasperated with my bullshit antics okay??#“...okay sugarboobs? snookums? babycakes?.... Logan?”#and they just sit there on the floor holding each other for a while#wade babbling and logan crying about everything he's lost and wondering distantly how he has come to care so much#about this blithering jokester in like barely a week#that the thought of losing him brought him crashing back to the worst memory of his extremely rough life#anyway that's enough tag mini fic lolol I'm having feelings about my own drawing I guess 😵#poolverine#deadpool and wolverine#poolverine art
90 notes · View notes
dayurno · 10 months ago
Text
this is somewhat of a vent post & something i said i would not do again but has been plaguing me enough that i think getting it out might feel better. so. has anydoggy else been. Baffled and upset by nora sakavic’s refusal to speak on how terribly aftg has treated its characters of color? with the author of the series coming back with a new book and starting up on her online activity again, and questions of what she’d change about aftg bubbling up, it’s particularly glaring to me that we are all playing this very long game of pretend where we ignore how badly the non-white cast has been treated & her lack of thoughts on it
and i understand not wanting to bring up nicky and thea because people pick on her for it. i’m not trying to discredit nora sakavic’s terrible history of getting harrassed online by aftg fans. but i think it is very cynical, and it is very juvenile, and most of all very cruel, that she gets to ignore the very real ways the books have set up these characters to be hated. i think it’s obvious why the characters who get the most hate are the only canonical characters of color, and i think we do not get to treat this like a deliberate decision on the fandom’s part when the books have put these same characters in degrading and embarrassing and terrible positions in the first place. aftg is not a story about nice characters with clean pasts, but there is a very specific nastiness to the only characters of color being a brown man who sexually harasses and later assaults the main character, a black woman whose only scene is her lashing out at her love interest after being ignored for the first two books, and the japanese villain who gets maybe two lines of complexity before he goes back to being a terrible person. the white cast, in comparison, while not at all free from flaws, are never shown to commit mindless evil; all of their actions are ultimately justified. the book goes out of its way to give them concession after concession. we know exactly who to side with, because aftg tells us who these people are. does nicky’s assault ever get addressed in the books? does riko’s reasoning to be the way that he is ever gets more than briefly aluded to? is thea reserved even a shred of humanity or grace in her one scene?
anyway. it’s been years of talking about this and the fandom has been constantly hostile to criticism in this regard, and more recently any criticism at all, and it’s Grating to be on the other side of this discussion. it’s exhausting to know that in ten years we do not get even an acknowledgment besides the author saying she will not answer questions about nicky and thea anymore. it’s upsetting and it’s ugly and i wish no one had to talk about this again, but we do because what i thought was common sense has been washed away by a sudden influx of no-nuance adoration for the trilogy. basically i hope we all explode
#this has been so upsetting to notice but 🥹whatever#there is a different kind of bitterness to thinking about how ten years have passed#and we are getting new content that changes and maybe even rectifies many of the ways we see and interact w aftg#and none of it not a bit of it addresses the racism#how it’s been ten years and the only thing we really get to show it is a book about a ship between two white men the fandom came up with#after seeing them be Suggested to interact in canon#i understand not wanting to hurt nora sakavics feelings by asking her about this#but imagine how tired we are. Imagine how tired we are#do you know how bad it feels to read through nicky’s worst moments in aftg#and know that he was written this way because he looks like me?#do you understand how exhausting it all is. can you imagine?#the fandom has been so quick to undo the criticism fans of colors have been making since day one#and for what. for what! my doves. for what?#have we come out of it any greater? have we done anything but lie to ourselves?#and anyway this is not some mindless pessimism#this is not me telling you that aftg is bad and you cant love it; cant have it mean anything to you#this is me saying that when we acknowledge these things it makes us better readers and better people#nora sakavic if you are reading this from whatever hellhole america you find yourself in#grabs you by the shoulders. This is not the end#this is not something to sit back and feel bad about#you have opened the floodgates of hell with tsc. kick the door in and release a revised version of aftg#there is a real material way for you to make this better. it is possible and it will not kill you#i would read a revised aftg. my mutuals would. many many many many fans would#making mistakes is not just a human right its a human inevitability#but we do not have to let ourselves get defined by them. We can do hard things#lets go of nora sakavics shoulders. anyway. where were we#aftg#txt#tsc
174 notes · View notes
lucienarcheron · 10 months ago
Text
The idea that some people still think Nesta’s main traits are supposed to be bitchy, mean, and a hater…idk what to tell you but the whole point of her healing journey is to not be those things because all it did was hurt everyone around her and herself.
133 notes · View notes
shukruut · 5 months ago
Text
if you're someone who draws fanart you can't let spoilers get ya because sometimes you're casually looking for references of a neat background-maybe-eventually-major character and then oops they die. and you did that to yourself.
59 notes · View notes
dykedvonte · 15 hours ago
Note
I was rewatching mouthwashing, and I ended up thinking of the different reactions that Curly and Jimmy had in doing their tasks. How during the scene of Anya evaluating Jimmy and showing dread towards the idea of doing his evaluation, Curly was the one that offered to take it off her hands. He had no issue with adding more to his plate, because he knew - or well, thought, he knew that Jimmy wasn't going to "bullshit" with him since he's known him for a long time. When Anya hands Curly a note from Swansea, Curly goes to check out what the issue is and he takes care of it without a complaint, the only "complaint" he has is how this incident could have damaged the pods. Which is reasonable, those pods are their only way to be saved if anything tragic happens on the ship. However, in comparison to Jimmy being asked to do things, he's passive-aggressive about it. When Anya asks Jimmy if he could help her out with Curly's painkillers, he tells her that people should be worth their titles, specifically using her title as a nurse when she asked him for help and then when she says forget it, since he made her feel insecure, he still goes "Oh no, I'LL take care of it" as if he was doing a chore, a favor for her. Then, there's that part where he blows up at her for things that she didn't even ask him to do - more so the others asked him about it, like the code scanner, him deciding he needed to find the axe for the foam, and then, there's the medicine part (which when she does ask, and she reconsiders - going to do it herself, he takes that away from her). Jimmy complains about the tasks he has to do and he treats it like a big issue, a "woes me" that he has to do this and that - wanting the praise of the capital without actually doing any work. While Curly doesn't complain about it, in fact, he even mentions that he's aware of how well he is doing at his job as a Captain during that cockpit scene with him and Jimmy. If Jimmy only had to do a small amount of tasks to get irritated and annoyed at being captain, while Curly didn't which I feel like encapsulates their personalities. Curly understands what he's doing is a job, it's a responsibility, why would he complain at any point for doing what he's suppose too? Why would he be upset at people asking him to do tasks? While Jimmy on the other hand, isn't used to it at all and it's different to what he's had before and he's realizing that he doesn't actually like doing the work he has too. I just wanted to ramble about it even if it seemed kind of obvious xd
It’s obvious but it is a thing people miss or understate when trying to find parallels in Curly’s and Jimmy’s relationship/personalities.
Like the way people portray it as neither taking responsibility when it is almost split down the middle of Curly taking responsibilities and faults that shouldn’t be his and making himself unequipped to handle the ones that are while Jimmy refuses to handle the responsibilities he has because he wasn’t expecting the work that comes with them.
Not a lot to say but people forget that another thing the game comments on is prioritization of issues and responsibilities and how the guys fail at it in one way or another in the situation.
#this talk of responsibility is more so about me be very annoyed with people acting like Swansea was the most responsible man on that ship#when he immediately takes a break after his intern in stuck in the foam starts drinking the moment he find out the mouthwash is alcoholic#doesn’t tell anyone about the cryopod or explain himself and did nothing about Jimmy either until it was too late#like I’m sorry but he is also the last guy I’d like to hear about responsibility from cause he did just as bad as Curly post crash like he#wasn’t even nice to Anya outside the one conversation we see he was actually just as rude to her as he was Daisuke when they cracked open#the crates and dismissive before hand like I’m getting more mad at the glorification of one guy vs the woman whose doing the most 4 herself#like I get his speech and the recognition of his faults but he still had them and they still were his downfall in the end and part of the#reason Daisuke listened to Jimmy and it’s not his fault that happened but it’s the same way it’s not Curly’s fault Jimmy is like that#but I digress cause people don’t exactly like when we actually discuss the responsibilities the crew mates should’ve and shouldn’t have had#or what they actually did to help cause idk Anya likely would not feel supported by any of them after the fact if they survived like girl#only ever got attention for her problems when they were literally at the worst that’s not helping or taking responsibility like she had to#kill herself to feel some sort of relief also the irony about Curly’s concern about killing herself only#for it to get to the point she actually did because there was no safety for her they all failed her#Swansea would’ve just told her to tell the captain and he’d watch Jimmy and ultimately it would play out the same cause he’s tries to not#get to involved cause he’s old and been through enough already and she’d feel just as unheard like he was closer to Daisuke#and not once after the crash did he really try to steer him away from liking Jimmy which again he points out himself#like I love Swansea and Daisuke but they were just as complacent in Anya’s suffering and Jimmy’s behavior even if they knew less that should#not make them more viable options or it more excusable like crazy conclusions to comes to ig on my part but yall hate#the idea that maybe a major point is that Anya was alone as a woman and overlooked#mouthwashing#ask#mouthwashing game#anon#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing
45 notes · View notes
kindnessoverperfection · 1 month ago
Text
Lately, when I talk about someone I strongly disagree with, I think about my friends.
When I interact with someone who regularly rants about people, and tends to take things in the worst ways (without any attempts at self-reflection or grace), I feel more on-edge. I'm nervous to voice opinions. I'm always over-thinking everything I send them, worried about how they'll receive it.
On the other hand, I feel much safer during conversations where someone is speaking neutrally about those they feel at conflict with. When they feel upset about a situation, but without talking aggressively about the other person. Because I know that if we're ever in a disagreement, or have some sort of conflict or misunderstanding, they won't hurt me or suddenly hate me*.
I used to speak much more aggressively about people. My personality disorders, combined with online toxic environments, were big factors in that. I was stressed and angry constantly, and I felt justified, and I felt afraid and ashamed to respond with anything but anger. But to make a long story short, I had several big painful interpersonal experiences where I realized how my attitude was impacting my friends.
I remember the nervousness in my friends' eyes. I remember the people I've met who are much older and never grew out of that reactive communication style, and I don't want to be that person. I want my loved ones to feel safe around me.
So nowadays, I do my best to speak compassionately (or at least neutrally). Because I want to signal to my friends that I'm not going to be cruel to them, or to automatically believe the worst of them, during a conflict or misunderstanding. I try to vent about situations and my fears instead of people.
I wish I'd realized this before.
*(I discuss splitting in the tags)
27 notes · View notes
energysynergymatrix · 6 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
Ok I bit the bullet and made an Ososan OC and his full name is Len Kanemaru.
He's the so-called perfect guy, pretty boy barista type turned up to 11, who might as well have manifested from thin air, who has genuine fanboys and fangirls, and most of the Matsunos want him fucking dead. He's oblivious to both of these aspects of the public opinion and seems kind of empty headed for the most part. He is also struggling just as badly as them but literally no one would believe him if he told them.
He also wants to kiss the oldest DESPITE the fact that his brothers are so jealous of him for being so perfect. Shenanigans ensue.
If you want a more detailed write up about him read the cut.
OK SO . Len is a guy trying his best to pretend to be an adult despite wanting to be anything but it. Unlike the Matsunos who dont pretend to be an adult and are anything but it, Len is trying to push through adult life while wanting to return to childhood when things were easier.
Sure he has a job as barista, but he's poor with money, spending it like he's still a teenager, struggles to maintain contact with people he’s befriended outside of work, DESPITE thinking people hating him is the end of the world, and surprisingly, still lives with his parents.
The thing is that he's REALLY good at pretending to have it all together. He has quite a few fanboys and fangirls and is often described as a prince. (It’s because of his charmingly good customer service skills that is his only real social experience post highschool.) But, despite being in his mid twenties, hes kind of poorly equipped socially and is unable to pick this up, despite it being clear to literally everyone.
(Like he thinks he’s being bad at pretending to be a well put together adult, and then turns around and can handle rush pretty well understaffed, not make any mistakes, and still keep a pleasant demeanor that his admirers swoon over. Anytime someone does act like a fan trying to get his love it’s met with confusion and just. “Huh.” more than anything. He doesn’t even reject them because he doesn’t realize so many people are in love with him)
This includes quite a few Matsunos who are jealous of him for being so popular (and admittedly kind of cool), find his princely yet oblivious attitude almost annoying, and somewhat creepy because of how much he knows about them from highschool. And those who aren't irritated by him are relatively apathetic towards him.
The only reason theyre so aware of him is the fact that he and Todomatsu worked at the same cafe before the latter quit. It was after he quit that Len properly met the sextuplets, having a chance encounter with the boys sometime after. Todomatsu was already irritated by him, by again, seeing above, but also because he already seemed intimately familiar with Totty during his highschool years.
It's like they had a whole classmate just manifest into being while skipping the "actually go to class together" part.
(They did actually go to school together but literally no one knew he existed during then. Not to their fault though, Len was basically that one vine that's like "I can't I have so much to do tomorrow" *fucks around on the keyboard. Because of that Len ended up being bad with people by the time he graduated and was ushered into the work force by his parents. As a result he can't really keep friends, often times contact dying off on accident. A lot of the time spent working is him TRYING his best to maintain relationships as an adult but it never really works out. Deep down Len wishes he could redo highschool, so he could not only get this skills but also find some memories that he so clearly missed out on. Because he willingly opted out of making those therefore other people don’t remember him. As far as he knows he hasn’t really had a friend since middle school.)
But like after the two and Totty's brothers encountered each other in public a whole bomb got dropped and nothing was the same.
Despite generally not liking him the Matsunos keep him around, mostly due to Totty's insistence saying they can use him (so they cant kill him yet!) but because Len is kind of bad with people in general outside of having a fandom (that, again, came with his customer service skills), and the Matsunos are the Matsunos, this never ever goes well.
Despite this and how much shenanigans the Matsunos end up dragging him into, he considers them friends since its the closest relationship he's maintained outside of his house. On top of that, he almost admires them for being NEETs. He's kind of ashamed of it, because he knows they have to be an adult, but because he's struggling so much as an adult, he wants nothing more than to be like them. He wants to stop being an adult and return to highschool.
It's why he takes to Osomatsu so much, since he seems most open about how shitty he is and how much he doesnt want to grow up. Like weirdly enough, his man-child behavior is what makes Len likes him so much. Sure he also has a big heart and loves his family, and Len can acknowledge Oso’s best aspects, but it’s the worst parts of him that loves.
And that admiration for having his character laid out flat and embracing his childishness despite his age and situation, how he practically will just grow up when he wants to rather than when he has to (unlike Len), makes the perfect man fall for the loser guy.
The more he hangs around the Matsunos the more they encourage him to tap into his evil side, and may end up making him worse, but for now he's Mr Perfect and most of them hate him for that. He doesn't get the message though so he's just kind of hanging around them for now.
Anyways he and Osomatsu are literally I'm Glad You're Evil Too to me . And also look at these sketches of him .
Tumblr media
#txt#ososan#osomatsu-san#osomatsu san oc#Len Kanemaru (OC)#my ocs#my art#lenoso#oc x canon#when i think more in depth into his individual relationships with the sextuplets i will probably do a better write up on that#i think the sextuplets are ultimately conflicted on him but because of that conflict#especially given their opinions before they learned more about him#it comes out in hostility and jealousy#mainly from Todomatsu#and maybe choromatsu i think#ichimatsu and len actually relate to each other a lot#especially since len is kind of struggling with what ichimatsu was going through in highschool (except as an adult)#but because they dont really communicate well either they cant really have their :handshake: moment until much later#i think osomatsu is the one who bridges their gaps though and helps clear the air on both sides mutual jealousy#with len and oso having a heart to heart over some drinks (that the former paid for by blowing an entire pay check)#(Len being horrible with money moment)#but again thats much later . and i think since ososan is a bit focused show anyways#the inherent bit of Len pining for Oso while he has better suitors trying to get his attention.#all while the brothers are wishing the worst upon him#is very funny#its like nyaachan and just dont except for the part where everyone liked nyaachan because none of them like him#(osomatsu might be a bit more conflicted on him though . something something oso might have actually remembered him then. again ill think)#but theyre all kind of oblivious to everyones exact feelings going on so they just kind of hang out and hope#len will hook them up with someone (he will not)#if u want to hear more about him or have questions send me asks... i would love to share and think more about him.
21 notes · View notes
copia · 7 months ago
Text
i'm going on exam season lockdown as of today, which means no more gifs/edits/anything else because i spend way too much time on them for an engineering student in the trenches lmao. posting this not because i think anybody will notice or care, but so i can hold myself accountable and get embarrassed if i break the pledge. see you on june 3rd for a ghovie creativity extravaganza
edit: besides the ghovie trailer 😭 i cant restrain myself from that one
#actually june 4th because i will be drinking on june 3rd from the moment i close my semiconductors paper#cold turkey on gif making KHBJDGVSCDH RIP#genuinely its such a relaxing thing to do that i find myself prioritising it#and unlike other chill activities it gives me the illusion of productivity#i really need to be getting that from my work and not silly bands#anyway. see u#also in my 4 years of making edits like this in many different circles i've never once felt the need to mention a like/reblog ratio#and i'm fully of the opinion that people can do whatever the hell they like and i never expect interaction#i'm grateful for what i do have#but what primarily motivates me to do this is people sharing their love for whatever is on the post#in the tags or elsewhere#i'm not talking praise or thanks or anything to me i mean 'i love this song' or 'papa looks great here' skdcvkdgvs#'this is my favourite band' u know? it's sharing passion with other people and having them share theirs with me#and in all the 4 years and many many fandoms this (ghost/st) is by far the worst for interaction like that#i'd say ghost especially skhjcsd#and this tag rant isn't a request or a 'please interact more!' or anything like that it's just#a reason as to why i'm a bit discouraged that i'm chatting about to nobody#oh yeah and especially seeing photos posted with no source and no edits get 5x the notes you'd get#the quantity of notes doesn't matter to me but the discussion and tags do#just checked my notes in the middle of typing this and someone rbed some papa ii gifs with#'hope he's steady on his feet the way i would run into him'#KDSGKDSD that's what i'm on about 😭😭😭😭😭#makes me smile knowing something i posted made somebody feel joy abt a silly band and then shared that with me through the tags#i'm aware i've been here for just over one month so shouldn't be making judgements just yet#but sometimes i wish there was more of that
21 notes · View notes
itspileofgoodthings · 7 months ago
Text
Taylor returning over and over to the falling through the ice accident in the Bolter—everything to me
#like. just. the shock of it all#there’s something about Taylor where her experience of life is so ….. brutal#like I don’t know how else to say it but it just is. life is not easy on her it is always ready to CLOBBER her#and in a way she’s not easy on life. there’s some kind of magnets/opposite poles stuff where she’s just always drawn to the worst things#to feeling them and experiencing them and almost ??? creating them#like I don’t mean to overstate it. and I know she has a family who loves her (thank GOD)#and also she’s very practical and industrious about creating this very Instagram worthy life full of Fine Things and a Fun Time#and of course all the resources in the world at her disposal to create all the trappings of it#whether it’s a celebrity Fourth of July party or the eras tour#and she’ll do it and love it. but as all the best critics know and point out the most fascinating thing about Taylor is always the music#and it’s where all the weirdness and stubbornness and difficulties of her life. her a c t u a l longings her actual fears#her actual terrible awful experiences that she charges headlong down the paths of#is set free! and it’s breathtaking in the most shocking way#like falling through the ice! I always say the first thing that always hits me about a Taylor album is the bitterness#just this blast in the face. and her music is so gentle! in so many ways#and the packaging is so appealing and her voice is so soft and expressive and there is none of that weird experimentation#even musically (remember when she shut down imogen heap for putting a minor chord in clean she was like absolutely not. I’m obsessed)#(with that moment forever)#but like. so much of Taylor’s packaging and life and HER really does SEEM so basic or ordinary or just rich girl ordinary I guess#she likes basic things and wants basic things. but also she is so hungry so restless so angry so wounded the rich internal life is CHURNING#all the time. every second. and it’s spectacular to watch and also I will worry about her until the day I die#or just—-I don’t know. it’s going to be spectacular and it is sometimes going to be awful#but she will keep furiously writing her way through it!!#there IS such a woundedness to her. and it makes me love her so much because it’s packaged in such a way people think it must just be#whining or privilege. but it’s not! it’s just. the human condition and Taylor’s own flaws#okay I’ve lost the plot here a bit in my ramblings but yeah the ice metaphor. insanely perfect
16 notes · View notes
orcelito · 2 months ago
Text
Considering the. Ahem. Ways this year has gone, I've not been thinking about it all that much, but. I did start this year with the motto of Year Of Unfucking My Life. With a few goals involved in that.
I got an official adhd diagnosis, as well as a diagnosis for PCOS. Other diagnoses in progress. Gotten adhd meds and birth control to regulate periods. I've gone back to school and I'm keeping up with it better than ever before. I've even been working on practicing driving, something I've been largely neglecting since I first got my driving permit, um... 11 years ago...
I just need to actually Get my license. And I need to get it before the end of the year. If I can accomplish that, then I'll say the Year Of Unfucking My Life was successful.
#speculation nation#i had some pretty major negative And positive influences for this goal of mine.#primary negative influence of course being my dad abruptly dying.#but that also led to the primary positive influence of the life insurance payout that's letting me just focus on school for my final year.#it's like a monkey's paw curl kind of moment. i got a genuinely astounding amount of money#more than enough to live off for a year+ and pay off the rest of my schooling.#with this i have finally exited the purgatory of part time school full time work to pay my way through school#a setup that led to endless stress (both physically and mentally) and suffering grades.#failing some classes and taking longer bc part time Anyways. locking me into years and years of this perpetual fucking Hell.#ive escaped it. school is so so so much more manageable when i dont have to work a job. im actually keeping up with my assignments.#for once theres no uncertainty about passing any of my classes. i Will pass them all. and i expect As in most if not all of them.#it's been fucking Amazing. everything i couldve wanted. and it came with the low low cost of losing my father when i was only 26.#... 'low' being sarcastic here of course. he was the 2nd worst person i couldve lost in my life. second only to my sister.#the 2nd worst grief i will Ever experience. bc he was my Good parent. hes the very reason i have a future at All.#and losing him fucked me up Severely. im still working on recovering. i kind of figure i always Will be.#thank god id already been taking spring semester off bc that would've been Horrible to go thru while in school.#i honestly probably would've just withdrawn from the semester. theres no Way id have kept up with it#given how damned BUSY those first few weeks after were. between funeral prep and inventorying and packing up his house.#so fucking much involved in settling an estate. and im the lucky one in that my sister's been handling all the legal shit.#so i simultaneously was dealt one of the most severe blows i ever Will be dealt#while also being given probably the biggest boost i'll ever get in my life.#if everything goes well with graduating and getting an IT job then i'll never want for money again.#considering there was a time early last year when i got as low as literally $7 in my bank account. this is a pretty big deal.#it's just... strange. the ways things go in life. this has been a very strange year for me.#just doing my best to use this boost to the best of my ability. even if it feels like im taking advantage of his death.#it's what he wouldve wanted me to do.
9 notes · View notes
shalom-iamcominghome · 4 months ago
Note
Were you out as trans to the Rabbi who managed your conversion? I'm Jewish and trans too (from birth tho), and I'm interested to know how it worked for you
I'm still in the process, but I have so far not told anyone about my being trans. I don't know... I just don't feel as though I need to qualify my manhood, if that makes sense. I've been finding in many of the largely cishet jewish spaces that I'm in that I feel more accepted even when I'm stealth than when I'm in non-jewish cishet spaces, so I really don't find it that big of a deal to make it Known. Obviously, it may be different when it comes to my rabbi, and it'll likely come up because I want to look into maybe an alternative to a brit (not out of requirement, out of my own want)... If you couldn't tell, I'm still trying to figure out what I want haha!
I guess the long and short of it is... It just works for me? It's rather boring the way it's been for me, and for that, I really am grateful. I know it's not the same for everyone, and I want to make it clear that this can absolutely coexist with having a really boring, uneventful experience with this.
11 notes · View notes
cupoteahatter · 3 months ago
Text
POV, the novelisation of your current favourite TV show boiled every character down to their most basic concept and trope, made the main character painfully OOC, removed so much nuance, minimised the role of the one black girl in the main cast, villainised the local abused boy instead of upping the ACTUAL villain/antagonist’s presence and destroyed a perfectly good codependent homoerotic friendship by making it instant love in 368 pages:
Tumblr media
3 notes · View notes
savage-rhi · 8 days ago
Text
🫂
#i've had many people ask me in the DMs what could be done to help me out given the orange menace is coming back into power#the best things for me right now (I can't speak to others) is this: 1. Keep supporting my creative endeavors#no matter how little I might post or interact. Please hype me up. I need community. I need spirit to survive.#2. Help me find resources that will help myself and others. Food banks. Community meets. Passports. Finances. Mental health etc.#these are important and I don't want others feeling like sitting ducks. Even though I'm scared I want to be a solution to the problem.#I am going to be a helper in this mess cause that's who I am and I need ammo in this capacity#3. Donate so I can up my ration storage. I've been collecting food water and nonperishables and I'm trying to stock up on medication#and other basic necessities. I'm collecting as if I'm preparing to be homeless again and if I am over capacity I'm giving rations to others#I've had to make peace with the fact I can't run away. I can't move to another country as I'm broke and poor like the rest of my loved ones#4. If you have friends who are disabled or a minority or lgbtq etc. do what you can to protect them and show them that you love them#and build community#5. Share my work and that of others. Who knows if we're gonna have sites like AO3 in the future or even access to tumblr.#this is all I can think of at the moment and again I can't speak for others this is what comes to mind for myself#And I admit I'm coming from a place of the worst case scenarios#because in my mind if I imagine I'm dead or homeless etc. and work my way backward to the next worst thing before that it unravels my fear#and it gives me back my power in the situation by sitting with those fears and giving them time to speak#because in my mind if I'm already dead if I'm already homeless or at war etc. etc. then its already happened and what else is there to fear#if I've been through everything already in mind?#I'm hoping that the worst case scenarios don't transpire but I can't ignore the fact many of them could and probably will happen#in some capacity but I can control the actions I take through prep and facing these fears one by one#and most importantly sticking to routine by making sure im healthy to help people#anyway this is why ive been quiet for a while besides for spending time with friends and loved ones recently to get over what happened#im going to keep going to my classes keep helping people through my jobs try to be creative when I have spoons and little by little#make sure I have enough of what I need to get through the storm and outlive the bastards in power#I'm not sure what sort of pink variant to assign this to but its along the magenta spectrum#love you guys#we'll get through this
6 notes · View notes
yveltalreal · 3 months ago
Note
did you watch the actual noctowl house or like a bootleg version how do you not know what’s going on
i watched the actual noctowl house. way too much happens in the first episode. the amount of shit they do is stuff i would have expected to take place over the course of like 3 or 4 episodes. its incredibly hard to follow, especially when youre someone like me who needs to take amoment to fully process whats happening sometimes. not to mention that it gives you a very skewed idea about what the show is about. i should know the bare bones of a shows premise and what to expect by its first episode. the noctowl house does not let me do that.
you watch gravity falls, you have a vague idea that the show is about two twins who find a weird book that tells them about all the supernatural stuff in this small town, supernatural stuff they will be fighting. you watch amphibia, you have a vague idea that its about a girl and her friends who are sent to an alternate world where everyone are shit like froakies and stuff and its about her wanting to go home and learning how to live with the froakie people. you watch avatar the last airbender, you know its about aang who is the avatar trying to master the 4 elements and defeat the fire nation who are trying to colonize the other nations. you watch steven universe, you know its about steven who is this kid with magic alien powers who lives with 3 other people with magic alien powers and together they fight monsters and save the day and shit. like SUPER bare bones shit, no idea about the full plot, but you know the basic idea.
i could not tell you what they want me to know about the noctowl house. theyre going to be?? breaking people out of prison because theyre weird? being weird is illegal in this world? everything i have the vaguest spoilers of later in this show does not give me the impression that i am right. hell maybe its about luz being a witch?? i have literally never seen this talked about and like. YOU ONLY GET THIS AT THE END OF THE EPISODE. if the whole point is her learning magic why have an entire fucking. jail break and prison riot that served no purpose???? i literally needed a full 24 hours to comprehend what i had just watched. i watched this several days ago. i have been thinking on this mess for several days. this isnt me just like oh i didnt like the first episode at first but now that ive thought about it its fine. im not overwhelmed by it anymore. its just objectively hard to follow, and my close friends have told me that yeah, no, it does not get any easier to follow.
like tbh i think the owl house at least from what ive seen COULD work, just not with the pacing it has at this point. i would have split the first episode up so its like. kinda ends with luz doing more of the chase in the city with eda and maybe seeing more magic shit and putting the saving eda stuff in the city before they escape and have luz ask to be trained to be a witch there and then like. have the next few episodes be prepping and training before they break into the prison and then an episode for the prison break and ensuing prison riot that luz starts. either that or like. the owl house feels like it would be more fitting as a series of fantasy novels rather than a disney show.
like i dont hate the context i just think it has the most dogshit pacing. who knows though this is all from what i know of the first episode and some of my friends being like yeah no the pacing just straight up gets worse near the end so. idk.
2 notes · View notes
arlydarkfire · 1 year ago
Text
being a smaller creator is fun and cool actually because I can be REALLY embarrassing online and nobody gives a shit because i'm like a little worm to them
10 notes · View notes