#though that doesn’t sound right. so yeah I’m going with it being a flashback

[avataroftheglowcloud]

I am having THOUGHTS about the new BBC Ghosts trailer.

[joedirtymadre]

Assignment

YUTA X READER! FLUFF! (Please send more requests... IM BEGGING)

You let out a deep sigh. “Something on your mind (Y/N)?” Panda asked. You were in the middle of eating lunch with Toge, Maki, and Panda. “I don’t know… I guess, or I don’t know if I’m overreacting…” you trailed off as you let out another sigh. “Well spit it out already,” Maki said. 

“I think Yuta is avoiding me,” you blurted out. “Yuta?” Panda asked. “Yeah! This whole week every time I’ve spotted him and tried to talk to him, he’d always have somewhere he has to be. I understand being busy, but at this point it just seems like he’s trying to avoid me,” you explained. “That doesn’t sound like Yuta,” Maki said as she rubbed her chin. “Bonito flakes,” Toge said. 

“Whew, so I’m not crazy,” you let out a sigh of relief. “Did you guys have a fight or something?” Panda asked. “Not that I can remember…” you started, closing your eyes trying to think back to any possible moment. 

“Wait, well… there was one day where…” you trailed off.

Flashback

“Yuta!” you called out as you raced over to your friend. “Oh, hey (Y/N). How are you?” He asked. “Tired, just came back from a mission,” you groaned. “Really, well I’m glad you’re-” he stopped himself. You looked up and noticed his eyes focused on your stomach. You glanced down and noticed him staring at your large gauze pad. You zipped up your jacket, not wanting to bring too much attention to it.

“What happened?” he asked softly. “N-Nothing crazy, this cursed spirit just had quite a few tricks up their sleeve. One of them just caught me by surprise,” you explained. “I’m fine though! I already have a new assignment planned for tomorrow, so no big deal,” you smiled. “What? You already have an assignment planned for tomorrow? Why?” He asked, his tone slightly raising. “Huh? What do you mean? There’s a cursed spirit found in an abandoned apartment complex that needs to be dealt with, why wouldn’t I take it?” You asked him. “Then I’ll tell the principal to send me instead,” he said.

“What? Why?” You asked, confused. “Because you should stay here and heal, why are you already taking another assignment when you’re injured?” He asked. “Because I told you already that I’m fine, why are you making this a big deal? Besides, you already have a whole load of assignments to do,” you replied. “It’s fine, it’s just one more. So tomorrow stay here on campus, I’ll deal with it,” he said firmly. 

“No way, why are you acting this way?” you asked. “Because you should stay here and rest, what if tomorrow you die because of your injuries?” He asked. “I said I’m fine, why are you making this a big deal? I’ve seen you come back with way more bandages than me and you never thought about staying back to rest. So why should I?” you asked. “Because I’ve always been fine! But you-” you cut him off. 

“I’m what? Not strong enough?” You questioned him. “N-No, that wasn’t what I was gonna say,” he stuttered. “Then what? Why are you treating me like I’m some flower? I’m a sorcerer just like you and if I think I’m fit enough to take on another assignment then I should be able to,” you said. “Because… I don’t want you to-” he stopped himself. “You’re right, I shouldn’t be stopping you from doing your assignments…” he trailed off as he turned to walk off. You stared at his back as he walked off, wondering what just happened.

End of flashback

“I see,” Maki said. “Was I in the wrong? But seriously you guys I was completely fine, it was just a cut!” you said. “Yeah I get it, but it doesn’t hurt to have someone worry about you,” Maki replied. “I get that, but to go as far as try to take over my assignment just to keep me here? All because of a cut?” You sighed. The others stayed silent, unsure what to say.

“Well at the end of the day, the only way to really find out is by asking Yuta,” Panda said. “Trust me, I’ve tried,” you replied. “Well then… let’s corner him,” Maki said with a mischievous look in her eyes. “Salmon,” Toge nodded. “So we’re all in, now what’s the plan?” You smiled. 

Later

Maki, Toge, and Panda all walked towards Yuta. “Yuta!” Panda called out. “Oh, hey you guys!” He smiled back. “Are you off to your dorm?” Panda asked. “Yeah, I finished my assignment early, so I’m just going to spend the rest of the day relaxing,” he replied. “What were you guys doing?” Yuta asked. “Nothing much, we just finished having lunch with (Y/N),” Maki replied. “I see,” he nodded. “Kelp?” Toge asked. “I’m fine, it’s just that (Y/N) and I had a little argument… and I feel bad,” Yuta confessed. “An argument?” Panda asked. “Yeah, I was being a little much, but…” he trailed off. “But… don’t you think you should tell this to (Y/N)?” Maki asked. “I don’t think that’s a good idea… I’ve been secretly avoiding her all week. I’d have to explain that too…” he said nervously. “Well you can just tell her now,” Panda said. “Huh?” Yuta asked. 

Panda slowly turned to the side to show you clinging to his back. “I’ve got you,” You said with an evil look in your eyes. “(Y-Y/N)!? W-Why are you clinging onto Panda?” He asked nervously. “Because if I didn’t sneak up on you, you would’ve run away again. But now that I hear that you’re free the rest of the day, we can finally have a chat,” you said as you quickly hopped off of Panda’s back. “O-Oh is that G-Gojo calling me?” He asked as he tried to run off, but you quickly grabbed a hold of his collar.

“Not this time,” you said and dragged him off to your dorm. “Bye Yuta!” Panda waved, following with Maki and Toge. “H-Help…” Yuta said softly as you continued to drag him away.

You quickly tossed him into your room, once entering you placed a chair in front of the door and sat down. “No escape, Yuta~” you said in a sing-song tone. “W-What is there to talk about?” He asked nervously. “Let’s see… how about you tell me why you’ve been avoiding me all week? Is it really because I didn’t take that day off?” You asked. “N-No! Well, not necessarily,” you said, avoiding your eyes. “Then what is it? Why have you been ignoring me? Don’t you know how much it h-hurts my feelings, knowing that you’re avoiding me?” you asked softly. 

“I d-didn’t mean to hurt you!” He said abruptly. “It doesn’t seem that way…” you trailed off. “I’m sorry I got hurt, I’m not perfect and that cursed spirit caught me by surprise… So why am I being punished by having an off day?” you asked. “I’m sorry (Y/N)! Believe me, I’ve been acting stupid! I just…” He let out a deep breath. “I just hated seeing you injured… W-Whenever I see you hurt… i-it hurts m-me…” he stuttered. You noticed his face turn a deep red. “I care about you too Yuta, it’s not fun for me seeing you all bandaged up after an assignment,” you said softly, feeling your face get hotter.

“Y-You do?” His face turned darker. “Then… I-I have something to say!” He blurted out. “Ok tell me,” you smiled. “I-I… well I, I think… no! I know! Well I-I just really uh… and-” you slowly stood up from your chair and walked over to the stumbling boy. You softly cupped his face, bringing his attention to you. “It’s ok Yuta, just take your time,” you smiled. “I like you (Y/N),” you blurted out. Your eyes widened by the sudden confession. Yuta froze because of your lack of reaction, “I t-take that back! It’s fine, just pretend I never said-” you cut him off with a small peck on his cheek. 

“Jeez, at least give me a minute to collect my thoughts before you try running away again,” you huffed. “H-Huh?” he blushed. “I was just caught by surprise… a really, really n-nice surprise,” you said, feeling your ears burn. “Does this mean you like me too?” He asked, cupping your hands. “W-Well it’s not like I’m kissing every guy I see…” you said nervously. You were suddenly pulled into a tight hug, “I’m sorry I was being so mean the other day. It just hurts seeing you hurt, no matter the size of the injury. That’s why I wanted to take your other assignment, because if you ever-” you cut him off.

“Don’t think so negatively, just… let’s just enjoy this moment. No matter how long we’re together, ok?” You asked. “Yeah,” Yuta smiled. You sneaked another quick peck on his cheek, giggling at his beet red face. “You’ll make me have a heart attack…” Yuta sighed. “Sorry!” you laughed, as you both continued to hold each other.

[verstappentime]

miami 2024: charles gets his car stuck in practice. max is there. plus, it's the anniversary of the inchident, and charles doesn't know how to tell max he loves him. (part one)

⇢ “Hi,” Max says, unceremoniously, as he slips into Charles’s driver’s room. He has his suit folded down, hair speaking of coming straight from the car.

“Hi?” Charles frowns at him. He’s not wearing a shirt. Max is terrible at knocking.

“I wanted to see you,” Max says, slowly shutting the door. He looks down at where Charles is sitting on the floor like he expected him to be there. (He’s been down here probably thirty minutes, now, tracing the outline of the track on his pant leg, half-dissociated.)

Charles doesn’t want to ask how Max's practice was. He doesn’t want anyone coming and being nice to him, when he’s been such a fucking idiot.

This should be good.

“You are not supposed to be here,” he says, grabbing the shirt he’d discarded when he gave up on getting dressed and just sank down. It’s so fucking humid, and everything is sticking to him. He’s tired of lying about liking Miami. “You’re going to get us in trouble. They’ll say I’m giving you secrets.”

“I don’t think it works like that. Andrea won’t tell, anyway.” So that’s who he conspired with. “Can I sit on the floor with you?”

Charles nods, and Max settles down next to him, so close their arms are brushing.

He hasn’t changed out of his fireproofs, and he smells disgusting, but it loosens up the fist in Charles’s chest. “I wanted to tell you that I’ll kill you if you let this ruin your weekend,” Max says.

He says the stupidest shit sometimes. Charles can’t help a startled laugh. “I’m not worried about it.”

“You were having a war flashback when I came in here,” Max says. It’s so easy to tell when he’s rolling his eyes.

Charles huffs. It’s easier not to look at him, so he looks at his knees. “I was practicing,” he says, even though it sounds stupid. It’s the truth. “In my head.”

“Right.” Max brushes his knuckles over Charles's arm, like he's testing if Charles will let him. “Did you watch the rest?”

“No.” It comes out petulant. He tweaked his neck during the spin, and he had to have Andrea work on it, and then he came in here to breathe and not be embarrassed or angry.

“Well. I spun out, too. So don’t feel special.”

“Really?”

“Yeah,” Max says, rubbing a little circle on Charles’s knee cap. It’s too tender for the flippant conversation, like he knows that Charles needs it underneath. “Fucked my whole lap.”

“Oh, no, not a lap.” Charles scrubs his hand over his eyes. “It does help a little.” He’s not proud of it.

“Testing the limit, hmm?” Max curls his hand around Charles’s neck, knocking their foreheads together. He can be so– tactile, gentle and sweet and– and irritating, and not supposed to be here. Irritating, and probably lept right out of his car and came here to comfort Charles in a way he’ll accept. “Okay?” he says, thumb tracing his nape. It feels really, really nice.

“Okay,” Charles says back, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. He’s still reciting nineteen turns in his head, but the anxiety is simmering. “Are you really sure you’re allowed to be here?”

“It is probably not encouraged, but I’m not getting a grid penalty for it.” Max stands up, offering Charles a hand. “Come here?”

Charles lets Max pull him up, and he’s gathered in for a real hug, even if it’s a sweaty one. Charles hates how it takes him a moment to slide his own arms around Max, squeezing tight, letting him know not to let go. This whole nine months, he’s been letting Max lead the way with physical contact, but sometimes he gets too stiff and doesn’t reach back out, and he wants Max to know that he likes him being close.

It would be a good time to say it. Love you, thank you for this. But he can’t, because Max deserves for it to be special, after he’s waited so long. He’s been saying it since month three. For Charles, the words always stick in his mouth like honey.

“How’s the jet lag?” Max asks, fingers stroking over Charles's spine.

“You are pushing it. And it’s fine.” He grumbles it into Max’s chest, wishing he could climb inside. It isn’t fine. They made a mistake flying overnight. Charles couldn’t sleep, then slept all day Wednesday. It’s Friday, and he still hasn’t set himself right. He’s never felt this lethargic in the car before.

“You were up all night again.”

“You can fret about one thing only.” Charles pokes him in the hip, and Max makes an overdramatic noise.

“You can’t be mean to me on our anniversary.”

“The anniversary of me trying to kill you,” Charles points out. Some joke about maybe I should do it again dies on his lips, because Max doesn’t deserve it. Because he can’t say the other thing after it.

“It’s still ours,” Max says, making it worse. He doesn’t even know what he’s talking about when he says shit like that. He isn’t even trying. Charles loves him.

“I’ll beat you to celebrate,” he says instead. He lets himself sag against Max, just a little.

He can hear a smile in Max’s voice. “See that you do, Leclerc.”

He doesn’t say that he’d hoped Max wouldn’t remember. That he sort of doesn’t think it’s funny anymore. It’s still ours, Max had said.

x

He doesn’t beat Max in the sprint quali, or the sprint itself, but it’s still good.

The lack of practice doesn’t touch him. He didn’t ever really think it would. P2 is enough for a sprint. He can build on it for the race, and beat Max then.

When Daniel cruises in just two positions behind them, Max is radiant with joy. Charles has always thought he probably should be jealous of Dan, of the way Max loves him, looks at him like the sun. But when he looks back at everything Daniel gave Max, everything he made Max, it stops mattering. He wishes Daniel could be up there with them.

When he watches Max hug Daniel and make an awful attempt at spinning him around, he sees Max from twelve years ago. You are going to be so loved, he thinks, wishing he could transmute it back in time. Because Max didn’t know, and Charles had hated him instead.

The thing is, he knows why Max was so upset that day 12 years ago, and after every racing incident after that, why he stayed angry and lethal for years. He didn’t have anything else.

Charles is just– having funny thoughts, is all. The date is making their younger selves feel so close. When they’re sharing the podium, it feels like he’s both there and not there. Like he’s watching them, grown up, together. He wants to grab that 14-year-old Max’s face and say You have absolutely no idea what is about to happen. You’re going to be happy, I swear.

[judysxnd]

Can you write about pedro and the reader in an interview for their new movie, and they just keep on giggling the whole time and can not take anything seriously. It's just very, very fluffy.

I didn’t know if you wanted them to be together, so I tried to keep it neutral, like it could imply both.

I’m almost out of the writings I did before I stopped and I haven’t been able to write the requests I still have. I’m really not into it anymore, I moved on so it’s difficult, but I’ll try.

——————————————————————————

You’re always a tad nervous when it comes to interviews and such. Being an actress makes it sound a little paradoxical but it’s true. One doesn’t prevent the other. But depending on if you’re alone doing the interviews or not also helps. This time, thankfully, you’re promoting your latest movie with Pedro.

You met while filming and immediately had a good chemistry. Everything was natural, moving on its own, like you’ve known each other your whole life. You’ve heard about him before but never met him before this movie. And everyone told you that he was very charming, that it was impossible not to be friends with him. You know where I’m going, yes, they were right.

To come back to the interviews, you were glad you met him, because he was always there trying to calm down, making jokes, helping you in finding your words and such. All of the interviews went well, but it was the first one that you remembered the most.

{flashback}

“You guys can sit here” a woman told you, pointing towards the chairs.

“Thank you” you said nervously, sitting down on the left, Pedro on your right.

“The first interviewer will be here in five minutes so you guys get comfortable” the woman added. You just smiled.

“Thank you” Pedro said looking at her. He then looked at you. “You okay?”

“I’m alright” you said with a small smile. He stared a bit more

“Okay, good” you took a sip of your drink that was on the floor right at the moment the interviewer entered the room.

“Hi guys” he said with a big smile, sitting in front of you.

“It’s been a long time” Pedro said as he recognized the guy.

“Yeah, too long” he joked

“Yes” Pedro said. You looked at them, feeling a little bit scared. They know each other, they’re going to have their own chemistry, it’s going to be hard to get through.

“So how are you?” The guy said looking at the both of you. Pedro had a big smile.

“Oh we’re great!” He said putting his hands on each side of his chair before looking at you. You simply nodded

“Good, that’s great”

“And how are you?” You managed to say without thinking

“I’m good too, thank you!” He gave you a warm smile. “Okay so, do we really have to introduce you guys? After the year you had” he opened his arms laughing. “Leading actress in one of the biggest tv shows” he said tilting his head towards you

“I wouldn’t say biggest” you blushed

“She can’t take a compliment” Pedro joked. “This is the biggest show of the year, just accept it”

“And what about The last of us?”

“Pf, that’s not the same”

“And look who cannot take a compliment either now” you argued, laughing.

“I’m not denying, I’m just saying that’s different” Pedro corrected you

“They look like an old couple” the interviewer said to the camera, then looking around laughing. You both stopped arguing, looked at each other before looking at him. “Oh oh”

“Did you-” Pedro said looking at him then at you

“Did you call us old?” You finished his sentence

“No I didn’t, it’s just-”

“But you did” Pedro kept adding, trying not to laugh

“I said you were acting like an old-”

“Hm hm, it’s too late” you said moving your hands and shaking your head

“Looks like you’ve known each other for your entire life”

“And it’s only been a year” you said “feels like forever though” you sighed. Pedro looked at you, faking an offended expression.

“She is the mean one as you can see” he rolled his eyes

“Yeah sure old man” he laughed

“Oh so she can call you old?” The interviewer asked surprised.

“No she can’t”

“It compensates all the time I had to put up with you” you couldn’t contain your laugh anymore

“Oh wow, really an old couple married for thirty years”

“You keep adding more” Pedro said, staring at him “be careful” he chuckled

“Okay okay I’ll stop” he looked at his questions “the question about being on set and such can be avoided” he joked

“Yeah” you said, giving Pedro a side-eye.

“Okay, well, how do you relate to your characters?”

“Oh that’s a good one” you said, suddenly feeling confident. “my character is very kind but too much like, she’s gives too much love when it’s not reciprocated, she’s waiting to find someone that matches her energy”

“That’s when I come in” Pedro said smiling at the camera “but my character doesn’t show it the same way, so it’s complicated between them”

“Yeah, but it makes such a beautifully relationship”

“Like the one you seem to have” the interviewer added

“Yes!” Pedro confirmed “but obviously we didn’t act like them”

“And, especially, we didn’t finish like them” you joked

“Yes that’s more important” Pedro laughed

“That would be a shame indeed. But do you think it could have ended differently?” You both looked at each other, knowing the answer.

“No” you said in unison

“They are in two different places” you said

“As much as they tried to get out, it got worse”

“Yeah, so I don’t think they would have had a happy ending either way”

“Spoiler alert” the interviewer said at the camera

“Oh shit sorry!” You looked at the camera too, covering your mouth. Pedro laughed “don’t laugh!” You playfully hit him

“Oh yes I can. You owe me twenty dollars”

“Oh man” you sighed

“You bet that she would spoil something?”

“Yes, well- I bet it would be her because she thought I would be the first”

“He’s always so excited that he forgets he cannot say anything!” You said exasperated, laughing

“That’s.. true” he admitted to the camera “but it was youuu”

“It wasn’t a big spoil come on, how does it count?”

“Yes that’s true, she didn’t say what really happens” the interviewer tried to help you

“Yes thank you!”

“Don’t help her” he frowned before laughing

“No but that’s true, I didn’t say they died at the end” Pedro had wide eyes, looking at you. You covered your face, shaking it

“There’s no going back this time, I’m sorry I can’t help you” the guy laughed

“Come on.. why??” You looked up

“Now I really get twenty dollars. I should even have forty, but I’ll be nice, twenty is enough”

“Okay let’s move on!” You tried to change the subject, avoiding Pedro. But he leaned near you, looking at the interviewer, but talked to you.

“It’s on camera, no one will forget”

“Okay okay” you tried to move away laughing. Pedro laughed too

“One word to describe the movie?”

“Drama” you said, everyone laughed

“With that ending yeah it’s a good one” Pedro said putting his hands on your arms, laughing

“Yeah rub it in, keep going” you sarcastically said laughing

“That’s what I do, you know me” he said removing his hands off of you, but kept looking at you

“Yeah, such a teaser” you rolled your eyes before looking at him. “Avoid making any mistake in front of him” you said staring at the camera “or he will make sure to never forget about it” Pedro laughed

“Good to know” the interviewer said, pretending to write it on his paper

“Like you don’t do it!” He tried to defend himself

“Because you do it!”

“They’re impossible” the guy said to the camera while you were arguing

“Can I see my word for the movie or my opinion doesn’t matter?” Pedro said, going back to the interview

“Do-” Pedro cut you, putting his hand on your mouth

“No need to say it” you removed his hand, both of you were laughing

“Unexpected” he said very seriously

“You bet it is” the interviewer said, knowing how the movie ends

“Now you too?” You asked, shocked “come on!” They all laughed

“Sorry I had too”

“Apology not accepted” you crossed your arms, looking away, pretending to be mad “if I know I would be bullied I wouldn’t have done this interview”

“Come on next one is on me” Pedro put his arm on your shoulders, and his other hand in your thigh. It’s so magical all he just makes you forget that you are in a professional environment. All the nervousness and anxiety were gone right after he started to speak. Everything was natural, like your relationship.

“It better be!” You confirmed

The rest of the interview went on like that, and as promised, you were the one bullying him on the next interview. The others went great. You were having interview after interview, all of them with Pedro, so you didn’t have time to overthink, he always made sure of it.

Everything is good, great, excellent, perfect with him. Not sure how he does that, but it’s not really important.

[euphor1a]

Yin to my yang | jjk

↬ pairing: jungkook x f!oc

↬ genre: best friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, hurt/comfort, fluff, smut.

↬ summary: “I don’t wanna sound cliché or anything, but you are the yin to my yang, y’know what I mean?”

Or, Jeon Jungkook was your knight in shining armor since the moment he entered your life. From being your rock during the toughest times, to being the most supportive and proud best friend imaginable, he was everything and beyond. Until now, that is, because you need to tell him how you feel before it’s too late, and the more you look at Jungkook, the more scared you are of messing it up. Little do you know that he’s on the very same boat.

↬ rating: 18+ (minors dni)

↬ word count: ~8.9K

↬ warnings/tags: character death, grief/mourning, mentions of controlling partner; explicit sexual content: profanity, dom/sub undertones, praising, dirty talk, pet names, breast play, fingering, cunnilingus, big d*ck!jk (cause yEAH), unprotected penetrative sex, creampie, rough sex, etc. — this is a work of fiction, and it doesn’t represent jungkook in any way!

↬ navigation

˗ˏˋ꒰ 🌺 a/n ꒱ this is something i’m really proud of /srs 🥺! happy holidays everyone, i hope this sweet little story reaches your hearts 💗! be mindful of the pov changes and flashbacks though (hope they are not too confusing)! and, enjoy! (banner cr.)

[You, 9:42 pm] gguk? can you come over, please? 

[You, 9:44 pm] well, if possible…

He must be busy packing and preparing for next week. Your grip on the phone tightens at the thought, eyes taking in the intricate details of its protective case with a thrumming pain in your chest. This artsy case was made by Jungkook several months back. He’s always been amazing at painting and craft, and when he saw the trend of hand-painted phone cases, he just had to make matching ones for his and your phone. You remember the proud smile on your best friend’s face when you told him that you loved it so much.

“This is… perfect, Gguk. I’m at a loss of words. I love this. I love you.” 

He wraps you up in a tight hug, chin resting on your head as he rocks you both side to side. “I’m so glad to hear that, muffin. I love you very much too.” 

Letting out a shaky breath, you look up at the dark expanse of the night sky above you. The half-moon shines bright with almost no clouds around, paired up with countless stars embedded like diamonds on the dark velvet. It truly looks so mesmerizing, crafted with such care, as if nature knew which collective placement will be the best beforehand. A small smile curls your lips gently. It reminds you of his eyes. You can go on and on about how Jungkook has the most beautiful eyes. On the other hand, Jungkook strongly disagrees, debating that yours are much more hypnotic and gorgeous. A fond sigh escapes your lips, the heaviness inside your heart seemingly increasing.

Your right hand unconsciously takes hold of the yin locket placed right over your chest, which dangles from a silver chain. The yang one belongs to him, and you mindlessly wonder if he’s wearing it right now. When he bought these last year on valentine’s, he made it clear that he wants to wear them always and forever. Something you had agreed to do too. You can still vividly picture the wide grin plastered on his face during the whole ordeal.

An involuntary shiver runs down your spine when you remember how his hot breath had fanned over your neck, his long fingers closing the clasp of the chain before gripping on your shoulder. He was beyond happy and proud of himself. 

Within a certain distance between each other, the magnets inside the pendants lock them in; putting yin and yang where they belong — together. 

Last year, on Valentine’s Day

“Yin and Yang, huh? God, that’s so cheesy,” you mutter shyly, avoiding his gaze at all costs. You’re certain if you look up at him, you’ll get that mushy feeling in your chest again. 

“Yeah. I don’t really wanna sound cliché or anything, but you are the yin to my yang, y’know?” 

“... Gross.” 

Jungkook smacks the side of your head playfully, mocking your tone, “Gross! Yeah, gross. That’s why you’re not looking at me. Because you don’t want me to see your kawaii ass happy eyes.” 

Shit, busted.

You try to change the topic immediately, knowing that he’ll most likely continue calling you out. “Why… why are you suddenly giving me this, Gguk? And today out of all days? Don’t tell me that you’re in love with me.” 

He groans at that, earning a snicker from you. “Relax, relax, I was just teasing you.” 

You don’t notice, but his shoulders droop subtly. Oh, how he wishes that you weren’t just teasing him. 

Done and over with small talk, Jungkook is quick to put the accessory on both of you. Before you can comprehend further, he’s standing just a few inches away from you, those pools of honey looking at you earnestly. “Ready to see the magic?” 

It’s like he knows how to make you weak in the knees. You just nod, not trusting your voice with this one. There’s this knowing smirk on his face you absolutely despise. God, you’d kill to kiss that smirk off his face. If you just lean in a little right now? Your lips will press perfectly against those pretty pink ones.

Click.

Broken out of your reverie, you blink rapidly, remembering why you two were standing so close in the first place. The yin and yang pendants he bought. 

When your eyes find his, you suddenly feel the urge to pull him closer and maybe touch your foreheads together. But you really shouldn’t. He’s still your best friend, after all. 

“Look how cool!” Jungkook squeals, eyes wide with astonishment and awe. You tilt your head down, watching the joined yin and yang gently dangling in the air between you two. 

Why does he gotta be so endearing?

As you look up to meet his eyes again, you freeze. Is he… leaning towards you? Swallowing nervously, you look down again, praying that he’s not able to hear the frantic beating of your heart.

“I think I should disconnect them. Unless you wanna stay like this.” There’s a certain suggestion in his tone that makes your stomach jump.

“Um— yeah. You should. I’d rather get stuck in a basement alone than what you’re saying.”

“Wow. And here I thought you liked me.” He pouts, his hands coming up to hold the yin and yang. 

“Don’t flatter yourself.” You try your best to look away from his hands but struggle to do so. Lord, why did you have to make him so perfect? 

You don’t know how long it has been, the only thing you know is that you are not going to look at Jungkook. You won’t look at his furrowed brows and his little pout, or his veiny hands that work hard to pull on the pendants.

“See how hard it is to separate them? Just like us.” Laughing amusedly for a moment, Jungkook refocuses onto the joined yin yang. He really is trying his best, using all of the core strength he can muster. You giggle, noticing that his face is turning red from the effort.

“What happened, muscle man?” You tease, hands covering his bigger ones that hold the yin and yang. He grumbles, lips forming into his signature pout — completely unaware of your heart that melts on point. Squeezing his hands in your hold, you huff, “At least let me try? You’ve tried for long enough now.”

Jungkook looks up to meet your eyes. “Fiiiine. Only because you’re being whiny and it’s distracting me.” 

Who is he kidding, again? Being this close to you affected him much more than he’d like to admit. And then you had to come even closer and hold onto his hands like he’s the most delicate thing ever. Fuck, are you doing this on purpose? Can you hear his heartbeat? Dang it, he probably looks like a fool right now. 

Slipping his hands out of your grasp hastily, Jungkook motions you to try. “Don’t chicken out now, will you?” 

“In your dreams,” you clap back, trying to turn the locked pendants in separate directions. He snorts, proceeding to criticize your approach until he hears a gentle click.

“F-fuck, how did you—” 

“I guess working out in the gym for hours didn’t really pay off, tsk tsk.” You pout at him in a provoking manner, eyes glinting as you lean down to touch his firm chest. Jungkook freezes momentarily, tongue wetting his lower lip while he watches you tuck the chain inside his hoodie. “There you go.”

He shakes his head, unsure if he’s relieved or disappointed. However, just as you start to retreat, his reflexes kick in, strong hands curling around your waist to hoist you up in the air. “You break my heart; I thought you liked that I go to gym.” 

Ignoring him completely, you shriek, “Put me down!! Oh my god, you’ll drop me. AAAAA!” You are unable to see the knowing smirk on his face as you writhe against his hold. “I swear to God, Jeon— you either put me down or you get kicked in the nuts.” 

“Mm. You may try,” Jungkook hums, face subtly resting against your chest. “But you keep forgetting that I’m the one here with a taekwondo black belt.” 

“Fuck you.” You frown at him. He really has a way to get on your nerves. Here you are trying to save yourself from further embarrassment, and he’s being a clueless dumb little boy about it. Oh, why is he like this? You’re quite sure that he can feel your pebbled nipples pressing into his skin. 

Jungkook snickers, loosening his grasp around you. “I’d love to, baby.” 

There it is again. The most infuriating shit-eating grin that Jeon Jungkook masters. You take a deep breath to compose yourself first, thoughts jumbled up from being this close to him.

“You’re so insufferable, you know that?” A huff escapes you, hands defensively covering your chest. You really hope that he didn’t register it. You’ll most certainly want the Earth to swallow you alive if he mentions anything about your—

“Don’t act like a diva.” Jungkook rolls his eyes in the cutest way possible, making you scoff.

“You’re talking about yourself, right?”

“Pffft, you wish.” 

Friendship and love. These two are very different, yet strikingly similar. True friendship is about trusting each other intently, caring for them unconditionally, and being ready to help your friend through life’s hardships. Strangely enough, love itself consists of all these things… but you just feel them harder, almost like a fever that numbs your senses. 

Over the years, you’ve always thought of friendship and love very separately. But right now, you wonder if they are the different sides of the same card? Because the way you’ve been feeling for your best friend for more than three years now, sure isn’t how you should feel about a friend, best or not. 

The biggest possibility is that you have, in fact, fallen in love with Jungkook and it ignites strange emotions inside you, which are probably led by some crazy hormones you don’t even know about. As exciting and ecstatic that makes you feel, you can’t deny how the constant fear of losing him makes your heart clench uncomfortably. You simply can’t afford that, he’s the only one you have at this moment.

Oh Jungkook… if only… 

At first, your initial thought was that you’re just super attached to him after all these years. And that’s why you suddenly started feeling protective of him when Jungkook talked about a female colleague who impressed him by her skills, or the sweet barista girl who always flirted with him. 

But as more time passed, it slowly became clear to you that it was not because you��re attached to Jungkook as a friend. It was… much more than that. And the thought scared you. Because you knew that you shouldn’t feel this way for him.

After all, he isn’t just your best friend of almost six long years… he’s also that person who helped you through your toughest times and till this day, there is no one else in this world who can understand you like Jungkook does. 

The story of how you two met isn’t exactly what people will consider as convenient. But it’s something you are, and you will always be grateful for. For him, because you wouldn’t be here otherwise. His endless support and care are the reason why you are an aspiring geologist today, following your childhood dream. You wonder if your mum and papa are watching you from heaven, feeling proud of you as you’re doing something you’ve always loved.

Six years ago, early March,

You sit in complete silence, yet you can hear the sound of your heart beating in your ears. For a moment, you just wish for this cruel world to take you away… just where it took your parents — your family, your best friends.

It’s been more than a month since you saw your universe collapsing in front of your eyes. And you couldn’t do anything about it. You were only able to tumble on the ground pathetically when you heard the policeman informing you about the car accident that snatched your world away from you. 

The sudden sound of the front door opening alerts you, making you sit up straight. Mr. or Mrs. Jeon must be here with the food supplies along with other household items a teenage girl would need. Mrs. Jeon texted you about it nearly an hour ago.

Mr. Jeon was one of your father’s colleagues, but they were very close friends outside of their professional relationship. With no immediate family left after your parents’ death, Mr. Jeon and Mrs. Jeon immediately took you under their wings. Though, you insisted that you live in your home, where you grew up, instead of moving in with them. You provided the explanation that you were already fifteen and some years later you would have to move away for higher education anyway; so, you wanted to learn how to be on your own. Both of them were hesitant at first, but they respected your wishes. Jeons had their own conditions, of course, visiting you thrice a week and providing everything they could possibly think of.

You are grateful, obviously, but deep down you can’t help but feel like a burden to the Jeon family. They have two beautiful sons, as you had learnt from your late father. He told you how amazing both of them were, especially the eldest one, Jungkook. Eight-year old yourself had felt stupidly jealous of this twelve-year old guy your father was praising. So, you pouted and complained that you were a very good daughter too. You remember how he chuckled, ruffled your hair and kissed your forehead. Following up with, “Damn right you are! My princess is the best!” 

A lone tear runs down your right cheek from that memory, and you rush to dry it with the back of your hand. This is not the time, you think, knowing very well that they’ll be knocking at your bedroom door soon. Surely enough, the sound of knuckles rapping against your door can be heard seconds later, stopping the train of your thought. “Wait a second,” you mumble, standing up and making yourself presentable.

Opening the door timidly, you look up, ready to greet Mr. Or Mrs. Jeon, but—

Who is this? Did someone break into your house? Is he carrying weapons? 

You carefully size up the tall guy standing in front of you cautiously. Sporting an all-black ensemble and with the visible part of a tattoo on his hand, he surely gives off the dream emo boy vibes girls drool over. However, that is just the start. When you finally meet his eyes, you notice just how beautiful he really is. Long and wavy black hair casually falling over those big doe eyes, striking jaw and a beautiful mole right under his bottom lip, skin so beautiful that it can make you jealous… He looks like a Greek god, crafted with love. You are so busy admiring that you don’t realize that Mrs. Jeon is standing right behind the stranger.

“____, sweet baby, how are you today?” 

You snap back to reality, noticing her right behind this… alluringly handsome stranger. “Oh! Mrs. Jeon, I’m– I’m alright, I guess. How are you?” 

She smiles warmly, “Do you still feel uncomfortable with calling me by my name? I’m good, thank you, sweetheart.” 

You nod wordlessly, indeed uncomfortable by the thought of calling a mother figure like her by her name. She reaches out to squeeze your shoulder. “C’mon, let’s head downstairs and meet your new friend.” 

Your body freezes, eyes locking with the guy who is now standing by your door frame. He offers you a shy smile, rubbing the back of his head and looking down nervously.

It was awkward, to say the least. You were certainly sure that Jungkook’s mother had set you two up because you mentioned that you felt lonely. However, he was very kind and caring towards you from the start, even when you weren’t sure how to feel about him. He never gave you false hopes about how it will get easier for you like everyone did. Whenever you two were spending time together, Jungkook was always incredibly considerate towards your feelings. He held both of your hands whenever you were having a breakdown, never once asking for a reason, or telling you some bullshit about being strong. He would tell you that your emotions are valid, that grief is hard to handle, and you were trying your best, always making sure to buy you some comfort food later. It took you a few months, but you were starting to trust him, slowly letting him in until you two turned out to be inseparable within nine months.

Picnics with him on weekends was the thing that basically kept you going. He would take you to the best spots he knew around the town, treating you with his homemade sliders and cupcakes because you really liked those. Sometimes he’d buy you ice cream or hot chocolate depending on the weather. You remember walking side by side and holding hands. Jungkook often complained about how cold your hands were, but he held them anyway because he liked the fragrance of your hand cream.

You remember the sleepless nights spent crying in his arms. He let you sob into his embrace, rubbing your back soothingly as you told him how much you hated this world. He would hold you all night, whispering sweet validations while rocking you back and forth. Jungkook made you feel secure and loved no matter how worse you had been feeling on the first hand. You thought of him as your guardian angel. And you quickly realized how easy it is to love him. So, you did. Loved him with your whole heart, not knowing what that feeling would turn into. 

Four years ago, On Jungkook’s birthday

You let out another hiccup, leaning onto your best friend’s firm chest for support. It’s presumably your first time consuming any sort of alcohol, and that too, mistakenly. After one glass of this extremely strong drink, you feel like the world around you is spinning. “I promise I ask– *hiccup* asked for a mocktail. I dunno what they gave– to me.” 

“Who gave you the drink, muffin? That asshole is gonna catch these fists, I swear to fucking god.” He pulls you closer protectively, his eyes scanning the crowded living room of his downtown apartment for an empty space. Jungkook needs to get you out of here. “Think you can walk to the bedroom? You can rest there for the rest of this party,” he murmurs into your ear, brushing a stray lock of hair away from your face.

“Yeah... I think *hiccup* so…”

“Okay. But hold on tightly, hm? You’re wearing heels so you need to be careful.” You nod, arms tightening around his waist as he guides you to the end of the room. But soon enough, you trip and hit your head hard against his back, a pained whimper escaping you.

Jungkook turns around immediately, cupping your face in his hands. “Are you okay, ____? Where is it hurting?” 

Extremely tired and not able to stand on your own anymore, you rest yourself against him. His strong hands hold you steady by the waist, your head falling back in the comfort of his chest. “Ugh… ‘m okay don’t worry, ‘m sorry Gguk… I– *hiccup* I don’t want to move.”

“It’s okay, shhh, I’ll take you.” Without any other word, he picks you up in bridal style. You wind your arms around his neck, nuzzling his neck affectionately and inhaling his musky cologne. People give you weird looks while Jungkook swerves through the crowd. 

Once inside his bedroom, he settles you down on his bed gently. You smile at him gratefully. “Thank you so much… and ‘m sorry for being such a bother.” 

“Shush and try to sleep. Your body has given up entirely.” He shakes his head, helping you out of your shoes. Soon after, Jungkook grabs a hoodie from a nearby chair and hands it to you. “Change to this. I don’t think that dress is… comfortable.” He points at the red bodycon you are wearing. 

“Oh. Um… I’m not wearing a bra underneath.” You lower your head immediately, clutching the soft clothing to your chest. From the corner of your eye, you notice how his ears are turning red. He opens and closes his mouth several times, failing to get any words out. It makes you even more flustered. 

The door to his bedroom files open suddenly, catching both of you off-guard. Jungkook’s girlfriend walks in with fire in her eyes, slamming the door shut behind her. “I literally cannot believe you two. I trusted you, Jungkook. I trusted ____ too, but I guess I have been too blind!” 

“What the fuck? Are you seriously implying that right now? Don’t jump to any conclusions, baby. You’ve misunderstood.” Jungkook is out of breath as he looks at Lulu, but her attention has already shifted towards you.

“She is underage, Kook! What the fuck! What were you two doing? Oh my god I’m — didn’t know that you’ve already turned into a homewrecker whore, ____.” 

“LULU! Watch your mouth!” Jungkook stands between you and his girlfriend, blocking her vision as she was glaring at you bitterly. Even though you feel numb, the burn of your tears is painful.

“I.. I was feeling unwell, so Gguk carried me here. I was just about to lie down and rest when you barged in, Lulu. Please don’t throw accusations without knowing what actually happened.” 

“Yeah. Definitely. I can see that. I should’ve asked Jungkook to distance himself beforehand when I noticed how touchy touchy you can get. But Jungkook? I really thought that you’re better than this.” 

He inhales a shaky breath, and from the way his hands form into fists, you know that he’s struggling to contain his anger. “Do you really mind calming the fuck down, babe? Because you’re not making any sense. We’re best friends, of course we will hug and hold hands and do stuff that best friends do! What do you mean by that phrase? You know damn well that I’ll never distance myself from her because of some insecure person’s paranoia! And you wanna know the truth? I thought that you were better than this too.” 

A pained mewl escapes you, your eyes blurring with tears as you feel the throbbing pain in your head increasing tenfold. Jungkook looks at you immediately, reaching for your side and holding your shoulders. “Hey, hey it’s okay, muffin, everything will be okay. I’m here. Shhh.” Those are the last words you hear before blacking out.

++

After who knows how long, you feel your senses coming back to you. The first thing you register is that your throat is extremely dry and burning. “Water…” you mumble almost inaudibly. But, when a cold feeling against your lips surprises you moments later, you open your eyes.

“Drink it,” Jungkook encourages, his hand holding the glass steadily close to your mouth. You nod before downing some of it, a sigh escaping you as the cool liquid soothes your throat.

“Are you okay, muffin? I was so fucking worried, gosh.” He places the glass on the bedside table, not once looking away from you.

“I’m sorry,” is the first thing you whisper, reaching for his hand and squeezing it in your hold. You’ve never felt more ashamed in your life before.

“For what? If it’s about the whole scene with Lulu– I swear—”

“For everything. I ruined your birthday party. I ruined what you had with Lulu. I ruined everything. I’m… I’m so sorry. Did you manage to talk it out with her?”

“We broke up.” His voice is strangely cold.

“Oh my god— I– Gguk I’m so sorry?! It’s my fault. Gosh, I… hate myself.” 

“I’m glad she broke up with me. And I don’t regret anything.” Jungkook smiles at you. “Try to get some sleep now, okay? It’s late.” 

“Gguk… what are you saying? I have seen how happy you two looked together– aren’t you, like, upset?” you press further, not believing your own ears. What is he saying? 

“You need to rest, muffin. We’ll talk about this later.” He stands up from his bed, and you just notice that he has changed into a simple gray tee and a pair of black shorts. 

“I won’t be able to sleep if you don’t tell me.” Your voice is surprisingly firm, a sigh escaping him. He takes a seat beside you on the bed, looking at you with gentleness in his eyes.

“Lulu… I was happy with her. Until she started to get really controlling. You remember how she was talking about telling me to distance myself beforehand? … Yeah. A month back she said that my friendship with you makes her uncomfortable. We argued and it ended up being a huge thing. She’s been quite toxic since then.” 

“Oh… I’m so sorry that you had to face that. And I’m sorry for being a problem.”

Jungkook grumbles, his face inching closer to yours until it’s hovering just a few centimeters away. “Say that again and I’ll shut you up. You’re one of the best things that has ever happened to me. I’m not gonna lose you for some stupid ass relationship!” 

You giggle at that, reaching out to stroke his jawline. “Stupid ass relationship? Says the man who can’t go a day without whining about some sort of intimacy. ‘It’s not my fault that physical touch is my love language, I feel lonely if I’m not being touched!’”

“You little minx!” Jungkook pretends to pounce on you, starting a playfight. You giggle and try to dodge his blows. He grabs a nearby pillow in response, hitting your head with it. 

“Oww,” you whine, falling back on the bed. That, however, makes him roll his eyes.

“Such a drama queen.” 

Two years ago, Christmas Eve 

The warmth from the fireplace does absolutely nothing to make you feel warm. The hollowness in your chest feels bigger with all these festive decorations around, but thankfully, he’s still here.

“Listen, if you want me to fight that asshole you just need to say the word.” Jungkook pulls you to his chest, fixing the blanket you’re wrapped up with. You just shake your head and snuggle up to him. He only huffs, complaining, “Fine. Whatever. I’ll break his nose either way.” 

“He doesn’t even deserve that. I don’t want you to waste your time on him like me.” 

“Ooo, sick burn. That’s my girl.” He pats your back before checking the clock, sighing. “My family will come over soon though… Are you gonna stay here with me or go back to your apartment?” 

“I’ll go back to my apartment. And no, you’re not coming to drop me off. It’s literally a block away.” You detangle yourself from his embrace, folding the blanket neatly before fixing your sweater.

“I know you hate anything family related, but would it be really bad if you spend it with me?” He holds onto your hand, giving you those big, doe eyes. Another wave of sadness hits you and you look at your feet.

“I’m sorry Jungkook. I just… can’t. Plus, I promised my roommate that we’ll be having a movie marathon and loads of junk food. She hates Christmas too.” 

“We’ll still have our 3-hour call though, right? I’ll text you after midnight.” He stands up, hugging you tightly and dropping a kiss on your temple.

“Of course. That’s our tradition. There’s no way that we’re breaking it.” You smile, closing your eyes from the peace you feel. Jungkook always knows how to make you feel better, no matter how bad the situation is.

Back to present

At this moment, you realize just how much you hate yourself for not telling him before. Could it have ruined your friendship? Maybe, maybe not; it’s impossible to tell. But at least, that way you wouldn’t have to cry over him a week before he’s moving away. To another country where he has many more opportunities as a freestyle dancer.

You should be happy. For all these years, you’ve seen Jungkook working his ass off, doing what not to follow his dreams. Although a part of you is immensely proud of him, it’s shadowed by the part which seeks his presence near you forever, refusing to budge. 

As you’re completely lost in your thoughts, you fail to notice the tall figure standing a few feet away from where you are seated. Rustle of clothes and soft padding sounds of naked feet drift closer, breaking you out of your reverie.

“Gguk. You came.” 

It’s hard to recognize your own voice as it rings in your ears. So broken and nasally that it makes you cringe internally. Gosh, how much did you cry? 

Plopping down on the soft blanket you had laid out hours ago, Jungkook shakes his head with a snort. “Why are you so surprised? We literally live in neighboring buildings, and I own a spare key to your apartment.”

With an affirmative hum, you wiggle closer to him, desperate to feel his warmth. A strong, tattooed hand wraps around your shoulders automatically, pulling you closer as if on instinct. Once settled, both of you sigh in unison.

“You were crying again, weren’t you?” The question seems a bit accusatory, but there’s only worry laced in his voice. 

Your chest tightens, Jungkook knows you like the back of his hand and lying most certainly won’t work. That’s why you opt to choose silence, nuzzling his shoulder for a moment before resting your head on it. The musky scent of him engulfs you like a tight hug almost immediately.

Jungkook huffs out a breath, his left hand cupping your cheek. Your eyes meet his enticing ones, stealing air from your lungs and leaving you slightly breathless. He hesitates to break the fragile silence between the two of you for several moments before giving in. “I promised that we’ll keep in touch regularly and do facetime when needed, didn’t I? I know it’s hard for you, hell, it’s hard for me too, but it hurts so much to see you like this. Please, ____. Be strong for me?”

“I’m trying my best,” it’s almost inaudible, followed by a mumbled admission, “I can’t live without you. I don’t have anyone else.”

Jungkook reaches out wordlessly, taking the hold of your other hand and interlacing your fingers together. The comfortingly gentle warmth of his touch makes your heart flutter, an involuntary shiver running down your spine. You notice how your smaller hand fits perfectly in his large and slightly calloused one’s grasp.

Inhaling a shaky breath, you cast your eyes down in an attempt to hide the emotions that might be displaying on the blank canvas of your face.

He has no idea what he does to your poor heart, does he?

But then, Jungkook brings your hand up to his lips, your whole body alight with anticipation as he drops a chaste kiss on your knuckles. “We’ll be alright. I promise,” he whispers against your skin, offering a half-hearted smile.

You can feel the way you are slowly crumpling under the pressure of your own emotions. A part of you yearns to tell him everything right here, right now, but another part, which carries the fear of messing everything up is enough to make your heart stop beating. 

Being in love isn’t as easy as people make it look like, you think, struggling to hold back tears that fight to break out. 

“Excuse me for a second,” you manage to choke out while standing up, dashing towards the bathroom. You don’t know if he has followed you or not, but you quickly lock the door, turning the shower on to muffle any type of sounds from you.

On the other hand, Jungkook stands in front of the bathroom door silently. His heartbeat is so loud that one might say that it’s gonna beat out of his chest. He’s anxious, fuck, he’s scared. What if you do something stupid? He’ll never be able to forgive himself if something happens to you.

He knows you and how your mind works. He knows that you feel like a selfish piece of shit for wanting him to stay here with you. And he hates that. He hates it because even after knowing exactly what you’re going through, he can’t help. 

There’s a constant battle going on in Jungkook’s system — a battle between his heart and his brain. The logical side of him still wants to move away and follow his dreams. Why? Because what if you don’t reciprocate his feelings? What if he’s just a friend to you? Will he be able to continue living his life normally if that happens? Will you be willing to continue this friendship? 

But, the part of him that is blindly in love with you, that wants to be with you forever, begs him to stay here and never let you go. He can’t possibly breathe air properly without you by his side. Maybe he sounds like a fool, but he doesn’t care. He needs to make a decision, and he needs to do it soon.

++ 

Devastating sobs wreck your body, your knuckles going numb from the pressure on them. You clutch on the sink for dear life, struggling to breathe properly as you feel the world closing in on you. Your head hurts and it feels like every single cell in your body is screaming at you. Do something, do anything. Please.

With the last ounce of strength you have left, you turn off the shower. Your sweaty palms slip on the door lock. So, you wipe them in a towel, fumbling with the lock again. It takes a while but the door creaks, announcing its opening. 

Jungkook wastes no time to get you out of the confines of the bathroom. His heart breaks when he notices your state, body shaking, eyes red and clothes soaked. “Muffin…” he trails off, his own eyes tearing up.

“I– I want to tell you something. Before you leave this damsel in distress behind for good. Just promise that you won’t hate me.”

“You’re not a damsel in distress! Shut up! And you think I can hate you? Wow. I don’t even know what to say.” A few tears escape his eyes, and you reach out to brush them away with your thumb.

“Why are you crying?” 

“Are you kidding me right now? Do you know how fucking scared I was? I thought— I thought—”

“Shh.” You press your index finger against his lips. Jungkook stops breathing for a second, watching you come closer. His hands wrap themselves around your waist instinctively. Your chest is heaving, wet clothes uncomfortably sticking to your skin as you lean into his touch. You let your lips press against his neck, his arms tightening around your sides. “I love you, Jeon Jungkook. And before you be a dumb little boy and say that you love me too, ‘m gonna tell you that I don’t mean it in a friendly way. I’m in love with you. I want you to kiss me whenever you’re in need of intimacy, I want you to cuddle me to sleep at night, I want to go out on our dream dates and cook our meals together, I want to be yours. Body and soul.” 

When you’re done whispering your confession against the sensitive skin of his neck, you realize that he’s still holding his breath. “Say that again.” He clenches his jaw, his heart rate dangerously high. 

“I love you. I want to be yours. I want to do cute couple shit with you and make everyone jealous.” The next thing you know is that you’re pressed up against the nearby wall, hands pinned over your head. Jungkook looks at you like he’s looking at a newly found ____, his breathing uneven.

“I love you too. So fucking much. I’m gonna make you mine and give you the whole fucking universe because you fucking deserve it.” 

You lean in to press your lips against his, to which he eagerly complies. Although it starts off as a cautious and sweet kiss, it doesn’t take much time to turn heated and incredibly needy. Jungkook growls, sucking onto your lower lip before prying his tongue inside the hot welcoming pool of your mouth. You moan immediately, euphoria coursing through your veins when your tongues start fighting for dominance. He wins the battle soon enough, controlling the pace while his hands explore your body.

He takes his sweet time to explore your mouth as well as the sensitive spots all over your body. Discarding your clothes hastily to feel your skin against him, he rips off your bralette. But you don’t care. You too, follow his lead and pull away slightly so that you can remove the layers of clothing from his body. 

Jungkook has you entirely naked except the yin necklace in seconds, his muscular arms throwing you over his shoulder in a frenzy and carrying you to the bed. You whine as you still try to pull off his pants, and he chuckles. 

“You’re unreal, baby. Look at you, so beautiful,” he coos, looking at your splayed form on the bed. The more he looks, the more it makes you feel shy. You cross your legs and cover your chest with your hands, closing your eyes and whining again. “No, no. Don’t hide yourself. Let me see you, please. I’ve waited for so long, baby.” 

You feel the bed dipping, his weight joining you on the bed as he hovers over you. You feel his yang chain dangling in the air between you two. He gently pushes away your hands and legs, leaving you bare and vulnerable under him. “You’re so pretty, my pretty little babygirl.” Jungkook notices the yin pendant resting next to your head, a wide smile blooming on his face. “Oh. You’re wearing it too?” 

“We promised that we’ll always wear them,” you whisper, fluttering your eyes open. Two pools of honey look back at you fondly, leaning down while placing the yin pendant on your chest.

Click.

“Yin to my yang.” He nuzzles your nose before touching your foreheads together. You smile, pulling him in for another kiss.

Jungkook trails wet, open-mouthed kisses over your jaw, neck and collarbones. You moan when he finds a majorly sensitive area. He lets his right hand massage your breasts, breathy whimpers falling off of your lips. His mouth sucks on the nape of your neck, wetness gathering between your legs from his ministrations. 

“Oh, Gguk…” Threading fingers through his hair, you pull him even closer, desperately wanting him as close as humanly possible. The groan he lets out vibrates against your skin. He finds your lips once again, fingers pulling and pinching on your hardened nipples.

“Fuck, oh god,” you moan when Jungkook briefly licks on your stiffened peak, gauging your reaction before diving in. He presses your tits together, hungrily licking and sucking onto them while kneading the soft flesh. 

“So responsive, fucking hell.” He mutters under his breath, his eyes trained on your movements as you writhe under him from pleasure. Your fingers are still buried in the strands of his dark hair, pulling on them for dear life. He grunts and groans, grazing his teeth teasingly over your nipple.

“Oh my god!” your body shudders, a sudden release catching both of you off-guard as you cry and moan in pleasure. Jungkook watches you ride out the high lustfully, a guttural sound leaving his throat.

“Already? But I didn’t do anything yet, baby.” 

You try to catch your breath, stuttering a reply, “Sorry– ugh, ‘m sorry— I didn’t know that I–”

“It’s okay, I liked it. It was sexy,” he nudges his nose with yours, fingers running up and down your sides. 

“It’s been so long since I’ve been touched like this… I’m sorry.” 

“Shh.” Jungkook shushes you, unlocking the yin and yang and letting your locket slide back on the bed. “Want to taste you.” Giving you one last kiss on the mouth, he continues to press butterfly kisses on your skin, following the path between your breasts. He smiles when he feels your hand reaching to intertwine with his. He places random kisses all over your tummy, inching downwards until he’s finally facing your mound. 

“You’re glistening, baby, already so wet and ready.” He hums, parting your nether lips and admiring the slick flesh hiding under it. “Fuck, I’ve wanted this for so long now,” Jungkook mutters, flattening his tongue against your core to lick a fat stripe.

“Gguk!” you whimper, thighs spreading further on its own accord. His nose briefly presses on the swollen nub as he provides you several kitten licks. 

“You taste so sweet. Like a muffin.” His voice is dangerously low, and it goes straight through your cunt. You shiver and mewl. If he doesn’t pick up speed, you might just lose your mind.

Thankfully, he himself is losing his patience. Jungkook enters your dripping cunt with his tongue. A groan escapes him when he feels your gummy muscles squeezing him appreciatively. 

He grunts, pushing harder and deeper, your essence filling his mouth. Your toes curl, and he softly brushes his thumb on your clit. You moan loudly, hips bucking up. As you try to move with him, tongue delving in and out, he thumbs your clit and rolls it in tight circles.

Your back arches, effectively pushing your pussy more into his face. Jungkook groans at the feeling. Your whimpers paired up with the sound of him eating you out bounces off the bedroom walls. 

Your hand tightens its hold on his hand, the spare one balling into a fist. He softly plucks his tongue out, eagerly licking you like you’re water and he’s been thirsty for a long while now. He leaves the warmth of your cunt to wrap his lips around your clit, sucking and grazing his teeth on it.

“Fuck!”

You pull on the bed sheets, and he gives your clit a soft bite. Before you can comprehend anything else, two of his fingers slide inside you. It’s a rather tight fit, but he’s not bothered.

“I’m gonna stretch you out so well, baby.” Jungkook purrs, starting to move his fingers in and out of you. The first few thrusts have your knees buckling even though you’re lying down. He somehow manages to brush most of the sweet spots inside you, a string of incoherent words leaving you.

“That’s right, it feels amazing, doesn’t it, babygirl? You feel so good around my fingers.” He increases his pace to see how you react, and he’s blessed with a needy whimper that has his dick throbbing in the confines of his boxers. 

“Please…” you close your eyes, craving more. You can feel his lips curling up against your skin.

“Please what? You have to be more specific,” Jungkook hums, teasingly running his tongue over your slit while his fingers halt inside you. You whine out of frustration, trying to move but his iron grip on your hips stops you from doing so.

“I need more. Please, Gguk… Oh—” He curls his fingers inside you, starting to move them again. His mouth latches back on your clit, coaxing a moan out of you. He scissors his digits in your cunt and you gasp. “I’m– I’m gonna come!” you cry out, head lolling back.

“Then do it. Cream my fingers like a good girl.” Jungkook grunts, adding a third finger inside your wet heat. The feeling has you screaming his name, eyes flying shut. “Look at you. Making such a mess and I haven’t put my dick in yet. Can you hear how fucking wet you are?”

You let out a wanton moan, your inner walls squeezing his digits as the squelching sound seemingly increases. He curses under his breath, suckling on your clit and keeping up the ruthless pace of his fingers. You shudder and writhe, his name falling off your lips like a prayer. Dangerously close to your release, you feel the pleasure coil inside your stomach tightening.

“Holy fuck!” Jungkook rests his forehead against your lower belly. Your cunt clamps down on his digits, heartbeat going crazy as you reach your peak without any warning. Chest heaving, you try to catch your breath.

“Look at me, ____.” 

You struggle to open your eyes, but eventually, you manage to meet his gaze. A whine escapes you when you see his chin glistening under the soft light of your bedroom. Adding more to your devastation, Jungkook extracts his fingers from your core, immediately putting them inside his mouth. 

“Gguk,” you whine, averting your eyes. He climbs back up on you, tapping on your lips with his index finger. 

When you look at him confusedly, he murmurs, “Open up.” Your cheeks heat up from embarrassment, realizing the reason behind his actions. You bite down on your lower lip, taking a deep breath before you finally part your lips eagerly. 

“Mmh!” you flutter your eyelashes at Jungkook and start sucking on his digits, the scene making his cock twitch inside his underwear. Tongue gliding across his fingers sensually, you let out several moans and whimpers, making him groan out of frustration.

“Stop giving me those eyes, baby, I won’t be able to control myself.” He grunts, removing his fingers from your mouth. He gets rid of his pants immediately. You gulp, noticing the massive bulge between his legs. Inhaling a shaky breath, you let your eyes take in the glory of his thighs, your pussy clenching around nothing.

“Like what you see?” Jungkook smirks, lips finding yours in a heated kiss. You cry out, holding onto his tattooed forearm for dear life. He grunts when he feels your wetness rubbing against his clothed cock. “So impatient.” His mouth catches your earlobe, his own hips starting to move against yours.

“Gguk… please, I need you in me.” Your voice is barely a whisper. With an impatient growl, Jungkook pulls down his boxers, his hardened cock springing out and slapping against your stomach.

A whine escapes you at the sight of his veiny, huge member. You rub your thighs together, watching the precum dribbling down on your tummy. He notices how flustered you’ve become, a chuckle rumbling in his throat. “I will ruin you babygirl, gonna fuck that innocence out of you.”

“Yes, fuck me!” You are straight up desperate at this point, cunt aching to feel him inside you. Jungkook huffs, suddenly remembering that he doesn’t have any protection with him. 

“Baby… I don’t have a condom.” His lips form into a pout, and you wonder how he can be so cute and sexy at the same time. 

“I’m on birth control.” Your reply is quick, legs wrapping around his waist to pull him closer.

“Fuck! You want me to go raw?” 

“Yep. Want to feel you.” Jungkook doesn’t waste another second, his hand gripping on his length to slide it along your wet slit. You let out another cry, eyes snapping shut. “Please don’t tease me, I can’t.” 

“Shh,” He shushes you, and soon enough, you feel the blunt, velvety head of his cock poking at your entrance.

“Oh my god!” A scream escapes you when he starts pushing in, his forehead resting in the crook of your neck as he waits for you to adjust. His girth stretches you out much more than you’ve experienced before. You writhe and whimper, feeling like it’s your first time all over again. A few tears wet your cheeks and Jungkook hurries to dry them.

“It’s okay, you’re okay. Relax, baby,” he murmurs against your skin, slowly sinking all the way in. “Let me know when you feel ready, okay?” He presses a kiss on your knuckles, threading your fingers together.

It takes you a while, but you eventually manage to adjust to the foreign feeling. Jungkook hisses when he feels your hips trying to rock against his. “Can I move now?” 

“Yes! Fuck,” your voice is heavy with need which makes him groan. He grips onto your hips, starting to pull away. Just when you’re thinking that he’s gonna pull out entirely, he slams back inside, eliciting a high-pitched moan from you.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, “I’m so sorry, I don’t think that I can be gentle right now.” 

“Ahh– it’s– it’s okay, I like it rough.” 

“Good god.” Jungkook growls, hips slapping against yours rhythmically. You take a hold of his right hand, trying to wrap it against your throat. “Fucking hell. Is that what you want me to do to your cute body? Fuck! Such crude actions from an angel like you.” He gently grips on your throat, applying minimal pressure that has your head spinning. 

“Jungkook!” Your scream is muffled by the sound of his cock pounding into you. His eyes stay fixed on your breasts, that jiggle with each thrust of his length. 

He laughs breathlessly into your hair when you tense around his cock, his thrusts hitting your cervix, deeper than before. It doesn’t take long for the pressure to coil low in your body, your skin tingling with warmth.

“Gguk—”

You don’t manage another word, but you don’t really need to. Jungkook slips a hand between your legs, finding your clit with unerring accuracy and rubbing it in tight circles. You scream his name, writhing as the waves of bliss roll over you. Through the haze you notice that he is still inside your cunt, hard and throbbing. He kisses you fervently, hissing when he takes in your debauched state. 

“I’m not done with you yet,” he mutters, dropping his forehead to yours and ramming his cock into your pussy. You curl your arms around his shoulders, mesmerized by his darkened eyes and the way they are focused on you. He keeps his movements rough, but there is a new, fragile intimacy between you two.

You glue your mouth over his, your breaths mingling as you taste each other. Jungkook moans when you buck your hips, meeting him halfway and grinding your clit over his pelvis. His hold on your legs tightens and you know that he is close.

“____– fuck, babygirl, I’m going to come so hard.”

You rake your nails through his fluffy hair, nodding frantically. “I’m all yours,” you whisper, voice breaking. He gives a few more hard thrusts and shudders, reaching his orgasm with a low groan and coating your walls with his thick, milky load. The feeling sets you off as well and you bury your face in his chest, whimpering with each spurt and twitch.

Blood pounds in your ears as you stroke the length of his back, your cheek resting on his racing heart. Over stimulation makes you feel a bit dizzy, soft whines leaving your parted lips. Jungkook caresses your thighs and nuzzles your locks, panting slightly. It takes a few moments for both of you to shake off the high – you raise your head first and look up at him. His eyes are warm, expression content.

“Please tell me that I’m not dreaming,” He mumbles, cradling your body in his arms. 

Your eyes soften at his words, and you kiss his temple, reassuring, “You’re not, Gguk. This is very much real. We are together.” 

“Let me take you out on a date tomorrow.” Jungkook presses a lingering kiss on your chest. “And the day after tomorrow.” Another kiss. “And the day after that too.” Another kiss.

“Sure… I’d love to go out on dates with you.” You manage a smile, his warm breath fanning over your neck. Before you know, your eyes tear up, a sob tearing itself from your throat.

“Oh my god— what happened?! Are you okay? Did I hurt you?” 

You shake your head violently, taking his right hand and kissing his body art. “We only have six days left together… Isn’t it so tragic?” 

Jungkook frowns immediately, remembering that he’s supposed to leave for another country within a week. His heart breaks, arms clutching on your body tighter. “Baby…” 

“I’d ask you to not leave but that’s extremely selfish.” 

“No no, it’s selfish at all, sweetheart. I promise to have a long, hard thought about this. I– I don’t want to leave either. How am I supposed to survive all alone, now that I finally have you?” 

“Gguk… you don’t have to–” 

“Shh, let’s not think about it right now. Just… I love you so much, muffin. You’re my world.” 

“And you’re my universe, Jungkook. I love you too.” Your eyes glisten with unshed tears, his brown orbs looking back at you fondly.

You don’t know what the future has in store for you, but you do know that he is in it. That is everything you’d ever want.

˗ˏˋ꒰ 💌 end notes ꒱

aaaa congratulations for making it to the end! thank you so much for reading, lovely! this is actually a repost from my old blog, but i don't think anyone remembers 😅! sorry for any mistakes left in there! and of course, i hope you enjoyed reading it! ❤️‍🩹

reblogs and comments are extremely appreciated! it helps a lot to keep writers like me motivated🌷✨; and you can also send feedback through asks if you’d prefer that <33

happy holidays once again, i’m hoping to come back with new content soon!

[rewordthis]

So I just watched the last episode of Wind Breaker and I’ll say one thing only; if you haven’t watched it yet, GO!

It got green-lighted for 2nd season for 2025, too!

I’ve been seeing activity about it around tumblr, and to be honest didn’t think much of it, but it’s good. It really is good. I’m already looking forward to 2nd season~ 😋

But right now I want to talk about something I didn’t like. Minor complain but, hey! My post, my rules!

You see…

Sometimes I have beef with the translations for niche things and sometimes it’s because they’re plain stupid…

Like, I hate how Umemiya says “do you like or hate him” here (specifically referring to Togame, あいつ, and actually stressing on the ‘like’ part in the next scene because Sakura tried to stand up for him) and Sakura just full out blushes like his crush has been found out (and he’s doing that a LOT! Trust me~ He’s a tsun, fun little guy <3), but the translation is just this generic line that sounds creepy af on top of detached from the person it refers to (すき is a word that is generally used as ‘like’ as in I like pasta, but for humans it heavily implies liking someone like that, because when mentioned it refers to the love side of the meaning) and it’s so… hmpf~ 😤

Sakura-chan seen through and through~ And he’s not even trying to deny IIIIIIIT (for once)!!! (//∇//)

And this has struck a chord, you know? Because Sakura is a tsun, he’s not accepting that people have seen through him but that’s the only case he does not say anything to deny it. He does not try to deflect. He merely blushes furiously but quietly accepts Umemiya’s statement before he asks what’s so important about being able to ‘converse’ with his fists like… _(:3 」∠)_

‘Yeah, I like him. Let’s change the subject… Why do you care?’

Umemiya’s explanation that this has to meet two conditions in order to happen is… making things even more personal… hhhn~ a) you need to face your opponent and b) to want to know them (and Sakura did thought that during their fight; anyone else getting flashbacks from all those shojo/bl manga this has been used as the catalyst for the mc to acknowledge their feelings, like I did here??? huh???). Ahem. Yeah…

Then the whole thing about how Sakura is still capable of accepting others, even though he says he doesn’t… (Nirei pointing out that he’s been accepted by Sakura even though he’s not strong enough to hold a fight on his own, is a proof of it.)

Not to mention how the only thing he could come up for punishment was “get cooler so I’ll want to fight you again”, coming from a guy who’s literally considering fighting his entire damn personality and reason to exist! ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ You like Togame, you accept him (even though you absolutely thought the worst of him at the start), and I dare say he’s even the first person you ever really came to like and your feelings were actually reciprocated — he had an impact in you the way he called your name and invited you to resume your fight — that you were thinking back to it, you also like how he’s stronger than you (you reflected back on how you’d actually lose to him if he hadn’t given up… come on, tell me I’m wrong if you can, I’ll wait~)… Joke’s on you, Sakura-chan~ (☝︎ ՞ਊ ՞)☝︎

Btw, I know Sakura-chan! What’s there not to love about Togame~ 🤗

Man made me emotional completely out of the blue, kudos to the studio and everyone that worked on this anime and especially these couple episodes. 🩶👍

Right, anyway… if you know me I’m here for the plot first and foremost but a port has many gates so… hehe 🤭

Also, I don’t know how I was under the impression that Sakura was a libra but the wiki had his birthday on April 1st, along with a couple more characters being Aries and I’m like… bro, that’s why the brawls… THEM BRAWLS!!! 😅

[victoriansnakearts]

So was a pretty decent episode, but I guess cause it wasn't focusing on the...'romance' part. I figured though this was just gonna be like Truth Seekers honestly....S2 seems to be doing everything to rewrite S1, despite that's not how a show should be written. I get it's one thing to maybe tweak a few things, but THIS? Seems a bit much considering you can chuck S1 out the window.

I will say though anyway, finally some Millie content even if it was....just showing her as she always was and not feeling insecure or what have you. Which that's fine, give me more action Millie, that's how she's always been and I like that for her character! Not to say she can't have anything else to her mind you, I just didn't feel what they were going for in Unhappy Campers.

But also with regards to that flashback. Maybe I'm the minority on this? But thanks to that flashback and Blitz n Millie's relationship within the rest of the show....

I ship them? Not the current iterations mind you, I realize obviously that Millie n Moxxie are married, I do like them as a couple.

But flashback Mercenary Blitz and flashback Mercenary Millie? I could jive with them being in a relationship. Alternate Universe, why not right? Comics do it all the time! Plus honestly, this fandom seems to pair Moxxie with EVERYONE in the show already.

Frankly the flashback really seemed to push them together, which I get it's more like being a best friends thing and I really understand that.

But part of my brain could see them as a pretty awesome, asskicking AU couple.

Didn't mean to go on a rant, my mind is a buzz with this AU coupling.

I’m glad we got Millie content, that’s probably the highlight of this episode and it goes to show that helluva boss can still be fun when it doesn’t have melodramatic owl content.

Yeah a good majority of season two either retreads season one or just wants to retcon it and I can’t understand why (season one is flawed but it’s still a fun watch why are they changing everything??? I just want a silly show about imps killing not a soap opera 😭)

Also blitz x Millie does sound like a fun AU ship! I never really shipped Millie with anyone besides moxie since she was kinda a nothing character but this episode does make me see the appeal!

[sweetlves]

our tandem hearts…

synopsis. reminiscing a small yet meaningful moment with chuuya

characters/pairings. teenage!chuuya nakahara x teenage!gn reader

genre. fluffy fluff

tw. none

a/n. idk how i didnt notice, but this is literally the same exact concept of my other gojo fic…major clown moment yall 🧍🏻‍♀️

chuuya nakahara.

a name you’re all too familiar with. the boy whose been formally assigned as your partner from the leader of the port mafia himself. sadly a few weeks later the infamous osamu dazai had been partnered up with you two as well.

but this isn’t about dazai, this is about chuuya nakahara. you are very accommodated with empathy, but for some reason, chuuya is a very hard person to read.

of course it’s dumb to judge someone’s character just by observing; is what surprisingly a lot of people say. but little do they know, observation can go a long way. just watching someone; their habits, body language, speech and of course, eyes can reveal a whole lot about them.

spacing out while watching chuuya was an accident at first. but gradually, you realize when it’s just you two enveloped by silence. he is a broken boy deep down inside. that is an obvious point, considering you two are in the port mafia.

but his eyes say different. vacant at first, but noticeably shift into pain and sadness. even though he seems to wear his heart on his sleeve, that doesn’t mean he’s shown it all. that stubborn hot-headed facade as a cover-up, not letting anyone hurt him.

looking up at the setting sky, you have flashbacks to the memories you’ve had with him. seeing that joyful smile of his, hearing a genuine laugh that he himself was probably not aware of. and especially looking into his eyes, show that at the end of the day. this boy is only a kid. a kid being surrounded by death and violence.

looking back at chuuya, he’s still spaced out, gazing at the beautiful sky. you smile to yourself. he senses your stare and turns to you.

“what?” he says raising an eyebrow

“nothing” you reply back with a soft smile

staring for a few seconds, eyes noticeably softening. “…weirdo,” he whispers.

“hey chuuya…”

“yeah?” he turns to look at you once again. you divert your eyes to the sky.

“if you weren’t in the port mafia, what would you do?”

“…what?…that’s a stupid question.”

“cmon, be honest,” you say with a smile in your voice.

“…hm…well…i don’t really know?” he leans back on his arms. “what would you do?”

“i’d wanna go to school.” he stays silent.

“and go shopping…and eat at pretty restaurants with friends!” your eyes sparkling with excitement.

he just stares at you, eyes soft with admiration, eyebrows raised.

“…well that’s…stupid. we’re in the port mafia, that’ll never be possible.”

“yeah i know…it’s a nice thought though.” you lay on your back, knees up, while chuuya sits there with his arms propped up on his as well.

“…do you think we’d be friends if we weren’t in the mafia?”

“what’s with these dumb questions..?”

“just curious~” he lays down side by side with you.

“argh…i don’t know” you turn your head to him.

“seriously…I’m like your only friend! besides dazai”

“no you’re not, you’re my partner,” he grumbles.

“i might as well be, we’re all we’ve got after all.” he stays silent, his eyes slightly looking at you. his mouth open, looking like he’s hesitant to say something.

“…ugh” he closes his eyes while grumbling as always.

“well that doesn’t sound like you like me,” you say with a soft giggle.

“i prefer you over dazai.”

“ah, so i am your last resort!?” you lightly push his hand.

“shut it already…” his eyes still closed.

“alright alright~.” silence takes over and you turn to chuuya.

“…you sleepy?” you whisper softly.

“..mm…yeah a little.” he whispers back groggily.

“hah, me too. today was exhausting…”

“yeah…” he opens his eyes slightly, “…thanks for staying,” he whispers.

silence takes over again. you feel the presence of his hand lying right next to yours. hands brushing just millimeters away. for some reason your touch senses heightened, the space between your hands feeling like a magnets, pulling the both together.

his pinkey brushing against yours. the small touch felt like electricity. you inch your hand closer as well. eventually his fingers interlock with yours perfectly.

everything feels so perfect right now. you could get used to these moments with chuuya.

© sweetlves. all works belong to me, please do not copy, translate, and repost on other social media platforms.

[cbk1000]

Hey, remember how I wrote a fic that was literally just about two men driving around the countryside looking at animals and being gay for one another? And it was 90,000 words? And at the end I went, "That wasn't enough nothing, so I'm going to write a sequel to this?" Anyway, here's a preview from that sequel:

Merlin gave him a few biscuits to show they were still chums, and then rested for a bit with his forearms on the table, recovering his stamina and courage for the follow-up round. The pocket on his scrub top was torn, and his trousers had seen neater days in a byre. He wiped the sweat from his forehead with his arm. The door opened, thankfully, before he had launched himself into the next round, and in came Gaius with his stethoscope round his neck, saying, “It sounded like the Blitz in here, so I thought I’d give you a hand.”

“Yeah, did it give you flashbacks?” Merlin asked cheekily, though he did not yet have the breath to be a fully-realised shit.

Gaius rolled his eyes. “Ah, Charlie. Have you been giving Merlin some trouble?”

“He’s given me all the trouble. I’m sedating him next time.”

“It’s only an ear cleaning, Merlin.”

“That’s easy for you to say. I don’t see you in here being the David to his Goliath.”

“David won, didn’t he?” Gaius replied serenely.

“Sure, if you believe a book that says some guy talked to a burning bush and he wasn’t even tripping balls.”

Gaius rolled his eyes. “Where’s Arthur?”

“Does everyone ask ‘Where’s Merlin’ when I’m gone?” Merlin demanded.

“No.”

“He’s shopping because we’re the worst gays ever and we live like two bachelors who forgot that they have to do things like actually keep replenishing the refrigerator which, turns out, doesn’t just refill itself. But I can’t believe he’s still not here. I bet he knew Charlie was coming in today and he’s sat at home right now swigging champagne and living the high life and laughing at me cutting off dog’s balls and putting in bloody ear drops.” Then his phone went, and he slipped it out of his pocket to find there was a text notification from Arthur. “His ears must have been burning.”

Gaius put on fresh gloves and knelt down stiffly to greet Charlie whilst he read the text, which said very cryptically, Ring me; I need saving.

He did so. “Hullo, it’s your handsome, charming, taller boyfriend, saying these things because he assumes if you try and refute them you’ll ruin the bit. Who do you need saving from?”

“Oh,” Arthur said on the other end of the line. “Ok. Right. Well, don’t worry, I’ll be there straight away.” Then: “I’m sorry, Olivia, I’m afraid there’s a bit of an emergency at the clinic. Right. I’ll tell him as soon as I see him. Right. But I think it’s really a pretty big emergency and I’m needed straight away. Yes, I’ll tell him. Yes. No, it’s not him on the phone, it’s one of the front desk staff. I think he’s in surgery. Yes. That’s why I’m needed. Exactly.” Merlin took the phone away from his ear for a moment to laugh.

“Are you free of her?” he asked when he had finished snorting.

“I’m hurrying across the street now, too quickly for her to follow, so I think I’m in the clear. Or else I’ll be hit by a car; either way, I'm free.”

“Is that what’s taken you so long to do the shopping? I was about to ask if you’d gone to York.”

“I’m at our very own Morrisons right across the street. I finished shopping nearly an hour ago. She ambushed me. Trixie has rabies again.”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” Merlin blurted out.

“Merlin,” Gaius scolded him with a frown.

“Well, sorry, but Olivia Harris thinks her bloody dog’s got bloody rabies again, so I’m pretty confident the next thing Arthur’s about to say is that she demands I go out there and fix her up with one of those rabies shots again before she’s torn limb from limb by her 14-year-old Pomeranian. Some people are too stupid to live, and I wish they wouldn’t.”

“Merlin!” Gaius barked.

“Oh, yeah, because this whole village is going to go into mourning if she cocks up her toes. Probably give Death a plaque and a hand shake when he comes for her.”

“I’ll be there in a minute,” Arthur said. “I’ve still got to get the shopping home, but I know she’s watching me, and if I don’t pop into the clinic for the ‘emergency’ then I might as well walk into oncoming traffic.”

“Don’t do that; I need you to help me with Charlie.”

There was a long pause on the other end of the phone. “Don’t,” Merlin snapped. “You dare go home or walk into oncoming traffic. I’ll drag you right out of hospital.”

He did not walk into oncoming traffic, but through the employee entrance a few minutes later, after Gaius, citing the imminent arrival of Arthur as a reason to scurry off without having so much as scratched one of Charlie’s ears had scarpered. Merlin, sensing the presence of a fellow cow wrestler, who might have been up to the gargantuan task before him, poked his head out of the exam room, said, “Get in here,” and yanked Arthur in by his shirt, in case the command had not been clear enough.

“Don’t manhandle me,” Arthur said.

“I thought you liked that,” Merlin said.

Arthur was still fresh enough to being dicked down that he coloured, very faintly, though bamboo shoots under his fingernails would not have gotten him to confess to it. He went into the overhead cabinet for some gloves, and then knelt down in front of Charlie, though all he would have had to do to meet him eye to eye was to stoop down a bit. “Hello, Charlie. Has this twat been mucking about with your ears again?” He rubbed them.

“I’ve cleaned them out and just need to put in the antibiotic drops.”

“‘Just.’ That’s like saying you ‘just’ need to build the third Pyramid of Giza,” Arthur complained.

“That’s right, I did the first bloody two, you whingeing pillock, now man up.”

“Good morning, by the way,” Arthur said, in a tone which implied very heavily it was not. Arthur had had a rare lie-in that morning whilst Merlin slipped out ahead of him, so that their last interaction had been the night previously, a shag which ought to have put him in a better mood.

“Good morning, you crotchety tit.”

“You’d be crotchety too if you’d just had to listen to Olivia Harris for an hour.”

“Well, I’m going to have to listen to her for another hour this afternoon I’m sure, so I don’t actually have any sympathy.”

“You never do.”

“He’s a rotten liar, Charlie, I’m delightful.” He hauled Arthur in by the front of his shirt, and briskly pecked him on the mouth. “In case Charlie leaves you my war widow.”

Arthur rolled his eyes. “Don’t be such a coward; he’s like a giant teddy bear.”

“Yeah, that’s why you were thinking about walking into oncoming traffic when I said you needed to help with him.”

“I was thinking of walking into oncoming traffic because I had to talk to Olivia Harris for an hour.” 

The teddy bear stood cooperatively enough for his two friends, delighted to see they had multiplied, and that the second was the lovely blonde who gave him against the express advice of his stingier partner an extra biscuit; then this friend too transformed into that vile, snakeish Judas. Arthur patted his shoulders, and said, “Up” a little wearily, though he regularly bore the weight of an animal almost as heavy. He scratched all round the ears with Charlie’s hot breath in his face, and under the lax chin whilst Merlin sidled in with the drops. He managed the right ear before Charlie had quite comprehended what was happening to him; then he lunged back from Arthur with a look to show how he had wounded him. 

“Whoa, there, mate,” Arthur said, catching his front legs, and pinning them to his shoulders, whilst Charlie hopped about on his hind legs, shaking his head, and whipping it about, and turning Merlin’s ministrations into something like a bloody-minded Cirque-de-Solei audition, where the interviewers were throwing roundhouses at him whilst he contorted himself for their amusement.

They were all three panting, sweaty, and dishevelled when at last the ordeal was finally over, and Charlie clumped down onto the floor, and then galloped over to the Sulking Corner because he knew that Arthur would want to make friends again with some treats, whereas Merlin would have merely called him a great baby. 

“How did this morning go?” Arthur sked, squatting in front of Charlie and offering him a chicken flavoured gravy bone. “Ear drops aside.”

“Pretty well. Diggy’s bollocks are no longer amongst us, RIP. Had an emergency c-section after that; poor bitch was in labour all yesterday and still hadn’t progressed by the time her owner brought her in, but all the pups were alive and she came through the surgery just fine. Oh, and Emma says she wishes you weren’t gay. And that you’re such a soppy loser for me that it defeated her mum’s homophobia.”

Arthur looked round from Charlie and arched his eyebrow. “What? So what you mean is, today Emma confessed to being totally insane?”

“She did all but say she fancied you, so, yeah.”

“I do have a history of attracting lunatics.”

“True,” Merlin said. “It’s your arse. If you just had your personality, even crazy people would leave you alone.”

“Oh really? Maybe I should stop doing squats, then. Live out the rest of my days in peace.”

“Don’t do that,” Merlin said, and swatted him on the bum, unfortunately timed to the opening of the door, which had been opened by Gaius.

“Merlin.” He frowned.

“What? That’s one of the most innocent things I’ve ever done to him.”

“At the clinic he is your coworker, not your boyfriend. I’m not going to have another complaint from one of our clients about you sexually harassing people.”

“That was a misunderstanding.”

“So you didn’t make a lewd comment to Arthur at the front desk in front of Mrs Clarke?”

“Well I thought it was under my breath.”

“You don’t have an under your breath,” Arthur retorted.

“Arthur started it anyway,” Merlin said. 

“I did not!”

“You said--”

“I don’t think Gaius needs to know what I said to know that you’re guilty,” Arthur cut in hastily.

“I’m certain I don’t,” Gaius said drily. “Nor do I want to have any inkling of 98% of what’s said between the two of you. Just keep it away from the front desk.” He jotted down something in the chart he was holding. “Do the two of you have time to see an alpaca today?”

“An alpaca?” Merlin asked.

“There’s a local breeder who’s just got a new male and bred him to several of her females without any pregnancies, and she was hoping we might nip over and take a sperm sample.”

“What am I supposed to use to collect alpaca jizz? I assume what we’ve got for the bulls won’t work.”

“We say semen, Merlin.”

“Well, regardless, semen, jizz, spunk, baby batter--what am I supposed to put it in?”

“You could use a bit of tupperware.”

“We are not using our tupperware to collect alpaca semen,” Arthur broke in.

“Calm your tits, I’m not going to make you eat out of it afterwards. Obviously we’d chuck it; you can’t erase that with a washing-up. But, yeah, not really keen on wasting some tupperware on that.”

“A sandwich baggie, then,” Gaius said with the serenity of a man who would not be sticking his hand under an orgasming alpaca. 

“I’ve still got to put the shopping away. I’ll take Merlin, nip home quickly, and then drive us over to the farm.”

“You just want me to put the shopping away,” Merlin complained.

“Well I did it the last two times in a row.”

“Well I was operating on a pig.”

“You always have some excuse.”

“‘Can’t, I’m sorting out intestines’ is an extremely valid one.”

“I just find it extremely interesting that these things happen when there’s shopping to put away.”

“It’s not like I’m scheduling rectal prolapses to coincide with when we do the shopping--”

“Boys,” Gaius said.

“Oh, yeah, right, alpaca jizz,” Merlin said.

They bickered amicably all the way home and whilst refiling pantry and fridge and cupboards, comparing the number of items each had put away, and determining whether he was or wasn’t carrying a fair load, till Merlin decided to cheat by saying, “I am putting away my stuff so much faster” to ensure that Arthur finished the job.

“You’re a cock,” Arthur said.

“You’re way too easy to goad,” Merlin said.

[archiveikemen]

Liam Evans Main Story: Chapter 6

I do not own any of the Ikemen Series content being uploaded on this blog, everything belongs to CYBIRD. Please support them by downloading and playing their games.

read this before interacting with my posts

Kate: What’s your perception of “evil”, Liam…?

Liam: To me…

Kate: I’ve never heard about why you joined Crown.

Kate: But if you don't want to talk about it—

I wanted to tell him “you don't have to tell me if you don't want to”, but Liam’s gentle smile made me hold my words.

Liam: I joined Crown seven years ago. Back then, Victor approached me because he was recruiting people born with curses.

Liam: “Why don't you join us?” Doesn’t that sound like Victor? At first, I found him weird.

Liam: At that point in time, I wasn't a stage actor yet, and I didn't really have anything to smile or laugh about.

Kate: … That’s why you accepted Victor’s invitation?

Liam: Yes. I was a pinhead who didn't understand the meaning of “fighting evil with evil”, but…

Liam: — I still joined Crown anyway. And everyone there gave me a reason to stay in Crown.

Liam: Just like Victor, Will has devoted his entire life to fighting evil with evil.

Liam: That’s why I want to be useful, even just a little bit. I don't want Will to hate me.

Liam: My buddy Harry is fighting his own battles. Even though I don't know what they are…

Liam: If Harry ever needs help, I’ll be the first to go to him.

Liam: Also—

(... Liam is always thinking of other people.)

Kate: Fufu, those sound so like you.

Liam: Oh…

Liam: Ahaha, sorry. Right, you were asking me about my perception of “evil”.

Liam: To me, “evil” is—

Liam: …

Liam: I need some time to come up with a good answer for you.

Kate: Okay, then.

Liam: Ah, that's right. I heard that The Scala will be performing “Wuthering Heights”. Did you know about it?

Kate: Yes, of course! I’ve read that story’s novel.

“Wuthering Heights” was a story of love and revenge that took place in the outskirts of Yorkshire.

(That novel being turned into a play… the thought of it is already so exciting.)

Kate: Which character role will you play?

Liam: The chairman, Tom, is having a hard time deciding on the casting. To the point he can’t sleep at night.

We took one look at each other and burst out laughing.

Kate: I’m sure I’m not the only one looking forward to seeing you on stage.

Liam: Huh?

Kate: After the “Romeo and Juliet” performance that night, I heard someone say “Liam shines as bright as Betelgeuse.”

Liam: Betelgeuse… you mean that bright red star?

Kate: Yes. I think she was trying to say that you were sparkling and dazzling so brightly that she couldn't help but want to reach for you.

Kate: That made me so happy to hear, even though I wasn't the one being praised.

Liam: …

Liam: Hey, Kate. Why do you think people look at the stars?

He looked up at the stars with his rose coloured eyes.

Kate: Because they’re sparkly? People are naturally attracted to sparkly and shiny things, such as diamonds and sun rays.

Liam: … Yeah, I agree.

Liam’s shapely lips curled into a smile.

Liam: People look at stars because they shine.

Liam: If they don't shine, people might forget that there are even any stars in the sky.

Liam: … Moreover, there's no value in something that doesn't shine, right?

(Liam…?)

Liam: Everyone wants a shining star, and if it pleases them and means something to them…

Liam: I want to be that star. I don't care if I’m just a fake.

Liam’s profile as he looked up at the stars felt lonely.

The profile that was so close to me that I could touch it if I reached my hand out, was like a star fading away at dawn.

— So awfully ephemeral.

(Liam is like a star to me. He’s not a fake, but…)

Perhaps there were stressors and responsibilities that only Liam knew as a stage actor.

No matter how hard I tried to imagine what they were, I could never fully understand what he was going through.

(Liam told me this on the night I was almost swallowed whole by the darkness.)

== Flashback Start ==

Liam: You’re the only one who can know how you truly feel, in the very core of your heart.

Liam: Your heart belongs to you, and only you. I hope that you’ll let me help you stay just the way you are.

== Flashback End ==

(... I wish to return Liam’s kindness, even just a little bit.)

I desperately searched for the right words, and expressed my thoughts verbally.

Kate: The Liam who shines, the Liam who tries to shine, and the Liam who doesn't shine at all… they’re all wonderful.

Liam: Huh…?

Kate: I’m sure that many people will be happy just because you are you. Myself included.

Liam: …

Liam: Ah…

Liam: Can I accept your ardent confessions of love?

Kate: I didn't mean them that way! I only like you as a person—

Liam: Ahaha! I know, I know. I just love seeing you get flustered. I’m sorry, alright?

I couldn't bring myself to blame him when he looked at me with that carefree and innocent smile.

Liam was the star he gave me that night. He was still there, shining brightly next to me. and never losing his brilliance.

Kate: The stars are beautiful tonight, so tomorrow's weather will definitely be clear… I’m looking forward to spending time with you tomorrow.

Liam: Tomorrow…

Liam: I’m part of your tomorrow too…?

Kate: Of course. I’m your personal fairytale writer, Liam.

Liam: … I see. In that case, I’ll do my best tomorrow so you won't start to dislike me.

I smiled in response to Liam’s teasing, and that was when my stomach made a pathetic growling sound.

(Oh…)

Liam: Ahaha, let’s have something to eat before we head home. There’s a tavern nearby, let me be your escort.

Liam grinned when I held the hand he extended towards me.

What I had for Liam was always feelings of adoration, but now… they're definitely more than that.

Deep in my heart, I felt that if Liam had any things causing him misery, I wanted to clear them all away from him.

(I wonder what this feeling is called.)

…

Liam: We’re here. The food and alcohol here are grea—

???: Wow, it’s Liam!

A young man with his hair tied back ran up to Liam and hugged him tightly.

(...!)

???: I just knew we were destined to meet tonight. I was sure of it.

Liam: Okay, Okay, calm down, Tom.

Kate: “Tom” is… is he the chairman of The Scala?

Tom: Oops, forgive me for not properly introducing myself. I am Tom, the chairman, director, and scriptwriter of The Scala. Pleasure to meet you.

Kate: I’m Kate, a friend of Liam’s. Pleasure to meet you too.

Tom: I’m having drinks with the troupe. Care to join us, Liam and Kate?

Liam: Only if it's alright with you, Kate. Tom and the rest of the troupe may be a group of weird people, but they’re harmless. Don’t worry about them.

Tom looked at me and gave me a thumbs up with a wink.

(... Fufu, he seems like a fun person to be around. Kind of like Victor.)

Kate: Certainly, I’d be more than happy to!

Tom: Alright then, in that case, let me introduce you to everyone. Hey, all of you…!

After briefly exchanging pleasantries, we sat down at the table with everyone else and enjoyed the food and drinks.

That tavern was Liam’s recommendation, so the food and drinks were incredible.

(Oh, Liam got surrounded by people. He looks like an ordinary man this way, it’s hard not to smile at the sight.)

As I watched Liam get surrounded by his troupe members, a lady with gorgeous black hair sat down right next to him.

(...?)

Bianca: Mind if I sit next to him, Kate? The men over there are insufferable.

Kate: Yes, of course. Go ahead!

As a fan of stage plays, I was thrilled, but I had to avoid having that written all over my face.

(... She’s gorgeous. And she smells so good.)

When that perverted thought came across my mind, Bianca rested her chin in her hand and looked at me while sipping on her glass of wine—

Bianca: I’m actually… Liam’s lover.

(... What?)

Those words instantly caused a heavy feeling in my heart.

(Why am I even shocked… of course Liam has someone this fine in his life.)

Kate: … I- I see.

Bianca: Fufu, I’m kidding! I just found it cute that you were gazing at Liam so passionately.

(...!)

Kate: I wasn’t… I- I was just smiling while looking at him…

Bianca laughed and applied rouge to her lips.

That made me feel relieved for some reason.

Bianca: Rest assured that Liam’s just a friend. I’m already in love with someone else.

Bianca: I haven't seen that person in a long time…

Kate: Why…?

Bianca: He was a sailor. One day, he went out to sea and was never heard from again.

Bianca: Everyone kept telling me that his ship was sunken and he would never return. However, Liam didn't.

Bianca: “I’m sure he’s still alive. It's going to be alright” … He consoled me when I couldn't stop crying.

Bianca: What I wanted at that point of time wasn't the truth, it was a “maybe”. A small shred of hope…

Liam knew that the tiniest bit of hope could give someone enough reason to keep living.

That's why, even when the situation was already hopeless, he told her the words she needed to hear.

Kate: Liam always knows what others want.

Bianca: Fufu, you’re right. However…

I could see Liam’s reaction in Bianca’s eyes, he was laughing while being surrounded by friends.

Bianca: Liam has never been able to figure out what he wants for himself.

(What Liam wants…?)

Those casually mentioned words took me by surprise.

(Liam is always giving me what I want, and telling me what I want to hear.)

(But…)

(Has he ever really wanted something from me?)

Liam always did things in a playful manner, and never once had he made me do anything I didn't want to.

I thought it was because he was kind, but — was that really the case?

(We’ve spent so much time together. It’s as if…)

(... he doesn't have any of his own desires.)

Liam: Kate.

I looked in the direction of the voice calling my name and saw Liam raising his glass with a smile.

Liam: I heard this drink has a very high alcohol level, so it's extremely strong. Would you like some, Kate?

The sight of his cheeky smile snapped me back to reality.

(I’m overthinking… right?)

Kate: Fufu, I think I’m going to pass out, no thank you.

Troupe Member: Hey, Liam. Don't recommend such crazy drinks to ladies!

Liam: Eh— is it bad to do that? Oops, I’m so foolish.

Liam: Kate, ignore what I just said and just drink this wine here. You too, Bianca!

Bianca: Seriously, men will be men regardless of how old they get. Come on, Kate.

Kate: Fufu, okay!

Whenever I was with Liam, it was always filled with fun and laughter. It was like a star had fallen in front of me.

I never noticed anything else.

— Nothing at all.

[aiura-stan]

1-8, let’s not be late!

This is the last chapter in volume 1! I know it doesn't mean much to people reading the digital scan online, but... I like the visual of progress! Here is a photo of volume 1 irl:

it really is tiny. That explains why all the lines in the scan are blurry.

Ah… I get it. jinsei (人生）= life (person + life). I learned a new word… it’s N3 so I don’t feel that bad for not already knowing it, despite it being an incredibly basic one�� Saiki, you really are a nerd, comparing life to rpg video games.

I like Saiki’s phrasing “it sounded like fun.” Life sounded like fun?

I wonder what the Japanese belief about souls before birth is. There’s not really much of one in Christianity. Hinduism and Buddhism both propose a life before birth as part of reincarnation. What is it here in the Saikiverse?

Personally, I kind of like the idea that a soul could have some fundamental interests and wants; more than that, curiosity. If souls exist. But I think they would have to be abstract things, like God and angels; things outside of our understanding while we are alive. I think this is the kind of thing that Toritsuka would know a lot about… maybe.

Okay that got off on a tangent.

Oh shit it’s this chapter! I totally forgot that this was in volume 1.

LMAO

Asou sensei… I am not sure how to feel about suicide being made funny. I guess: good? If you get a choice between laughing or crying, choose laughing… Nendou is such a pure soul, assuming that no one would want to end their own life on purpose.

Saiki won’t let him die <3 I am taking this as something sweet.

So… can Saiki hear people’s memories in these flashbacks? Or are they supposed to be fourth wall breaks? Both? I’m going with both. Rather than being like a movie, Saiki experiences flashbacks as though he were observing the person in the past (in other words, like he was really there.) That’s my take.

Also, Saiki has a ton of empathy. He just doesn’t show it. Like, this random guy (who ostensibly doesn’t have much going for him) tries to kill himself, and Saiki’s reaction is to compare his struggles in a way that makes sense to him; in video game terms. And he wants to save him and to help him. And he does.

Very mature of this random man, who a few hours ago was trying to fling himself off of a building, and a few minutes ago was talking about how he was too good for street performance. Had Nendou not intervened, I honestly don’t think he would have had the guts to do it…

Wow, I don’t know why this chapter is provoking my annoyance so bad. Hm. Well, maybe I do, but my Saiki k fan blog is no place for that.

In any case, it’s nice that Asou sensei gave this character a good ending (helped along by Saiki, of course.) Everyone deserves a chance to live a good life and do something that they enjoy. And being bad at something isn’t a crime. It’s just not a good idea to rely on income for something if you’re not that good at it (and not willing and/or able to work to get better.) Life lessons, I guess? Except it’s kind of undermined by Saiki. Which is a lesson in it of itself; sometimes fate intervenes and success comes regardless, I guess. Yeah, that’s an alright note to end on.

Another life lesson which is really profound— sometimes, all you need is one person to tell you that your work connected with them. Sometimes, that really is enough.

The only difficulty?? Saiki, you’re forgetting someone, aren’t you? A certain blue spiky haired, chihuahua sized someone who has a bold fake personality and a timid real one?

Aaaaand Saiki had turned this guy into Taylor Swift. fabulous.

Uh?? Translator error? He has 10 thousand copies, not ten million, right? Wait, why the hell am I wondering about this. I have the volume now and I can read Japanese numbers. let me check. Ok, it reads ハ… ハイ一万枚ありますから！(ha… hai ichi manmai arimasu kara!)

一万枚 (ichi manmai) = ten thousand.

ten million would be 千万 (sen man)

so yes, translation error. Translator probably got confused because 10 million yen is the amount of debt he has.

Honest to god this is one of the most fascinating tidbits about his powers and also an absolute crime that they left this out. I mean, I know why they did. But they should have stuck this detail about him projecting what’s stuck in his head somewhere in the anime, but they didn’t. It implies that to some degree Saiki’s telepathy isn’t always voluntary. And also that he doesn’t necessarily pick one person and beam thoughts into their heads. Hm. much to think about…

they were already discussing goods by the end of volume 1?! Well… Saiki k certainly did get merch in the end. I just wonder how much of it Asou sensei actually got money from, considering he didn’t get anything from the anime.

Alright, that concludes my review of the final chapter in this volume. Ja mata ne. end of 1-8💫

[lampmanliveblogs]

Ah, I see The Collector used his space magic to summon a book filled with the completed version of all the fanfics I’ve never finished. I know I always say it’ll be a miracle if I ever get all my ideas written down, but I didn’t think it’d take an actual miracle.

You guys might think I’m exaggerating, and I am for comedic effect, but not by much. Just today, I started jotting down yet more notes on my phone while eating lunch at work. What if Masha discovered that they had psychic powers? I have so many unfinished first chapters, short snippets of dialogue, and premises for stories written down on my computer, phone, in various notebooks, pieces of cardboard, and reciept paper lying around. It’s honestly a bit ridiculous.

Oh wait, the pages are stone slabs? Or maybe they’re supposed to be clay tablets? That’s kinda cool actually, brings to mind the earliest stories written down by man in our own world. You know, like the Epic of Gilgamesh.

…hold on, I gotta go get myself a drink to dramatically spit out in shock and disbelief, give me a sec.

…

”Right, now where was I?” I say as I sit back down with a refreshing beverage. I rewind the video by a few seconds and hits play as I take a sip of my drink.

”Collectors live long, we watch things pass.”

”Pfft!” I spit out my drink in shock and disbelief, spraying my computer screen with liquid. ”What!?” I exclaim between coughs. ”Other Collectors?

I mean yeah, sure, The Collector is a child of the stars and whatnot, I kinda figured there’d maybe be some subtle hint at a larger pantheon out there, but, uh… I guess we get it confirmed right here, right now. I was even thinking of including a joke about The Collector’s parents being Mother Nature and Father Time, I just couldn’t figure out how to work it in.

Alright, calm down Lampman, think…

Based on this short summary, it appears that the collectors are if not gods, then at the very least god-like beings. They travel the cosmos and collect specimen of various lifeforms to preserve them in their collections. That in and of itself doesn’t sound all that horrible… but, ah… that second paragraph is a bit concerning.

Should the mortal beings they collect begin to meddle in the affairs of the Collectors (like, oh, I dunno, maybe NOT wanting to be turned into a collectible), they’ll scorch the planet and wipe them all out. Which… yeah that sounds about right for gods of mythology.

Our little Lord of the Fireflies doesn't like that mentality though, they’d rather play games and have fun and make friends (though evidently, The Collector still don’t care too much about what the mortals want).

Right of the bat, this does make me wonder something: is it possible that The Collector we saw in the Owlbeast’s flashback in Knock, Knock, Knockin’ on Hooty’s Door wasn’t THE Collector, but another collector? Cause that’d explain why that one didn’t look a whole lot like this Prince of Plastic

It also makes we wonder if maybe The Collector ISN’T the Grand Huntsman worshipped by the Titan Trappers, but rather, another collector (or several of them). Indeed, we see at the bottom of the page, three collectors looming over several worshipping humans. Because’s I’ve been wondering about that; aside from calling King’s dad a bully for putting him in divine time-out, The Collector really didn’t seem to have much against Titans from what we’ve seen thus far. Heck, he was super excited to meet King. So could it be that The Collector was not the one responsible for wiping out the Titans, but rather some other collector?

What I’m thinking right now is that The Collector is the divine equivalent of a kid that ran away from home. And their family either doesn’t care, doesn’t know, or enough time has not passed for them to notice.

(hm… a kid that ran away from home because they didn’t fit in with their peers… where have I heard a similar story before…?)

(the book mentions that the collectors would scorch the air… the demon realm planet is covered in a boiling sea… perhaps scorching the air is a more poetic way of saying ”set off a bunch of volcanoes”? In real life, the worst mass extinction event known was caused not by the meteorite that wiped out the non-avian dinosaurs, but a massive flood basalt taking place about 251.9 million years ago, colloquially referred to as ”The Great Dying.” Volcanoes are good at killing stuff, is my point. and undersea volcanoes spewing out lava would explain why the sea is always boiling)

I mean, look at this face. Does this look like the face of someone who could wipe out a race of giants? Look at him! He couldn’t hurt a fly.

Except Belos, but he doesn’t count.

And I guess they did turn an island’s worth of people into puppets and force them to play along in their games, hmmm…

[jeannedarkterraguard]

Day five of Jeannes Pokemon Scarlet Nuzlocke

Okay apparently Black Friday/Christmas has decided to kick my ass this year and I have to work between 12 and 15 hours a day so I only have time to play on the weekend but here is the next day of my pokemon scarlet nuzlocke

I know after the last couple of flashbacks I'm supposed to be sympathetic towards him but... his entire design just makes me angry...

I'm sorry Ortega but the game wouldn't let me choose a body type... otherwise I would look like one of the (unusually many) buff women that are all around paldea

Oh... shit... I forgot about obedience levels

Slightly under leveled and my two main pokemon didn't obey me... but I managed to beat him without any casualties

Right back at ya kid... right back at ya...

I can't imagine why... is it because of your stupid bowlcut? Your pink/white suit with blue and gold accessories? The fact that you carry around a walking stick despite not actually needing it to walk?... I could go on...

That... that doesn't sound like a bad thing

Yeah Cassiopeia... most bullies are cowards... I feel like you should have predicted that

Urgh... double battles... WHY?!?

well... let's hope I don't accidentally kill one of my own team members...

That wasn't difficult but still... fuck you!

Look... a rap battle sounds fun... but I'm a basic white girl with no sense of rhythm so let's maybe not...

Please don't be a double battle, please don't be a double battle, please don't be a double battle...

FUCK YOU!!!!

Did it... and I probably should have done it earlier... I was way overleveled

Little training Session... Hydra, Adrasteia (I accidentally deleted the screenshot of catching her) and Hestia evolved

Okay that was by far the most fun I had with any of the gym challenges so far

Ah yes episode two of “let's confuse all the straight people”

I'm gonna be honest... I didn't pay attention for a minute here so I'm not sure how this happened but Hephaestus died

Aphrodite still carried the rest of the fight though

Okay... Ages in this game confuse me... we have Arven, a grown ass man, still going to school... (and I'm pretty sure I've seen a 60 year old trainer that was also a student) and then we have a literal toddler in the Elite Four...

Exercise... not what I expected in the psychic type gym

Ahh... there it is...

Oh hey it's one of the hot teachers (seriously why is every NPC hot? Like obviously the male ones are not my type but with the exception of the toddler I haven't met a single female NPC that wasn't at least a little attractive)

Don't you specialize in fighting types? And you really thought you had a chance against the psychic gym leader? (also I think the internet has ruined me because when she said “do what the winner says” my mind went to a very different place)

Final Gym Test...

Man, that was annoying

Last gym battle. This time against a supermodel

Should have done this one before Grusha

I know I made fun of Nemona a bit but she's genuinely one of my favorite rivals in the entire franchise

So I'm fighting a wrestler now... wouldn't be the first time... I mean... Crasher Wake was literally a wrestler

You know... I have a hard time believing some of this team star story... mostly the part about them getting bullied... I mean Atticus and Ortega, absolutely... Giacomo, sure... Mela, I guess... but Eri... that woman is 6 feet tall and looks like she could break a human in half... she would not get bullied... even if she was the nicest person in the world I would be afraid that one day she would snap... then again, bullies aren’t exactly known for being smart...

Bless her... she tried so hard but her stats are so garbage...

And that's the last boss defeated

What? Nooo... I would never have guessed...

Oh right I somehow forgot to post some of the screenshots of pokemon I caught... so here they are first Ananke the Riolu

Hemera the Charcadet

Nerites the Wugtrio

Ares the Bisharp

And Apate the Zorua

That leaves only the Pokemon League (and the Arven and Cassiopeia part but I wanna do the League first) I'm worried

Okay so Lisa told me that I should have my team at around level 58-60 (she didn't tell me anything about their types or anything but when she looked at my team she said I should train because my highest level team member were Aphrodite and Hydra at level 54 followed by Gaia at level 48) so I decided to do some grinding to level up my team, evolve all of them (well almost all of them... Stupid Hydra won't evolve until level 64) and decide which Pokemon I want to take with me... so here's my final Team...

Gaia The Meowscarada lvl:60

@ Expert Belt

Ability: Overgrow

Jolly Minted

- Flower Trick

- Night Slash

- Play Rough

- U-turn

Hecate the Farigiraf lvl:59

@ Expert Belt

Ability: Armor Tail

Quiet Minted

- Hyper Voice

- Psychic

- Thunderbolt

- Shadow Ball

Ananke the Lucario lvl:58

@ Loaded Dice

Ability: Steadfast

Modest Minted

- Aura Sphere

- Steel Beam

- Vacuum Wave

- Bone Rush (why can't Lucario learn a good special Ground move via TM?)

Sana the Dachsbun lvl:60

@ Expert Belt

Ability: Well-Baked Body

Adamant Minted

- Play Rough

- Ice Fang

- Thunder Fang

- Fire Fang

Hemera the Armarouge lvl:59

@ Wise Glasses

Ability: Flash Fire

Modest Minted

- Psyshock

- Flamethrower

- Aura Sphere

- Dragon Pulse

Hydra the Zweilous lvl:60

@ Muscle Band

Ability: Hustle

Adamant Nature (didn't need a Mint for this one)

- Crunch

- Zen Headbutt

- Thunder Fang

- Tera Blast

...

And that's it time for the league... tomorrow... I'm still nervous

RIP

Hephaestus the Bronzong (lvl: 39-47)

Adrasteia the Tinkaton (lvl: 20-50)

[casliveblog]

Custom Toonami Block Week 146 Rundown

Spy X Family: It’s the final episode of the dog arc! Man the dog arc has been a lot longer than I thought it would be given each main character got like one episode intro each and the dog’s had like three at this point. Thankfully Loid doesn’t kill the attack dog and is able to subdue him though he does lock him up and say he’ll come back for him but they never show him doing that. Anyway with the bomb gone and Dog Terrorist Bakugo fleeing the scene only to have his car fucking totaled by a single kick from Yor, the family’s able to reunite each thinking they saved the world today and each being kind of right. Anya expertly blackmails a government agency into getting to keep the dog and we get some nice character stuff for Sylvia, like she’s kind of a background character but this arc in particular has shown her a lot of depth. Once the dog finally gets there they give a heartbreaking montage of what he had to go through to this point to become a Data Dog and honestly yeah it’s a good One Piece style found family backstory told with no internal dialogue so that’s pretty dope. Turns out Anya’s plan of “get dog > befriend Damian> ??? > Profit” isn’t going to be so simple but still they have a dog and Anya’s as dumb as usual but she is really giving it her best to try and train him. They have a little adventure at the dog park and Anya gives him the non-copyright infringing name of Bond which is a bit on the nose for a spy family but I’m on record for loving the pun of their last name being Forger and having the dog that brought them closer together literally named Bond Forger is too good to pass up, it’s a dog that literally forges bonds, how can you not love that.

Inuyasha: So we interrupt the Princess Abi plot we just started last week to dive right into a special two part flashback about how Inuyasha and Kikyo met. I never really knew how to feel about this episode since some of the details feel off and even as a kid I could tell this was filler, so idk if I’d really consider the events of the special canon but it is pretty fun in a Star Wars Prequels kind of way because it’s just kinda watching shit happen and knowing it’s all gonna go horribly wrong by the end. We get some integration of other filler elements like Tsubaki’s tense relationship with Kikyo in that ‘that one coworker whose guts you hate’ kinda way and we get callbacks to Mistress Centipede being the original holder of the Sacred Jewel (though again I vaguely recall them saying it had actually been kept in Sango’s village until Kikyo came around so idk how exactly the details of that line up with canon but it’s more of a fanservice thing). Inuyasha hears about the jewel and he’s in the middle of his ‘doesn’t have a cool giant sword yet so he’s overcompensating for his half demon dick’ arc and because he meets Kikyo on the night he’s human he doesn’t do anything to provoke her and Inuyasha keeps coming after the jewel but a kind of begrudging respect forms between Inuyasha and Kikyo because Kikyo never kills Inuyasha and Inuyasha never resorts to underhanded tactics to try and get the jewel he basically jumps out every day and is like ‘fite me Kikyo’ and because this is pre-episode 1 Inuyasha she kicks his ass every single time. Still Inuyasha chides her about how smelly she is and she ribs him about being a half demon and they kinda roll into each other’s vulnerabilities because Kikyo feels like she’s in between worlds as well as the only teenage girl around that can obliterate an ogre by touching it and Inuyasha’s just kinda turned on by the ogre-obliterating I guess. They agree to exchange gifts and Kikyo actually prepares the Sit beads for him which explains why Kaede had them at the beginning of the series though we get a clue that her word would’ve been ‘Beloved’ which sounds a lot less spammable than Sit but is kind of more cold and cruel because she’s professing love for him and subjugating him at the same time which does kinda fit Kikyo’s character. Still Inuyasha presents her with the rouge that has a LOT more emphasis in Yashahime (even though I think it gets destroyed at the end of this special but don’t pay attention to that) and she gets the backstory about his mom and she’s moved enough to trust him to act without the beads now and doesn’t give them to him. And thus the two form a close relationship and nothing bad happens ever, the end. Also fun fact, was looking on the wiki to double check this was filler and not some side book written for a movie or something and turns out this is the ONLY episode in the entire original series that Kagome’s not in, kind of a neat touch also kinda funny how most anime have long stretches without their main character nowadays and Inuyasha’s just like ‘nope, Kagome in every episode except for the only one taking place entirely before she was born’.

Yu Yu Hakusho: Time for the end of Sensui, or at least I assume so given the episode’s literally titled ‘Sensui’s End’. So long story short Demon Yusuke kicks the absolute SHIT out of Sensui and supercharges the last Spirit Gun bullet to fucking blow him away. Yusuke gains control of himself again but is too late to do anything about it. Given this fight was probably the exact template for Ichigo vs Ulquiorra, Yusuke is pretty pissed about this outcome (not like ‘cut my arm off so we can fight fair’ pissed but still pretty pissed). Turns out Koenma resurrected Game Master as part of Sensui’s fucking Batman gambit to use his guilt to weaken the pacifier battery enough for him to overcome it and that means now he has no more get out of death free cards to give out which is probably fine because I get Yusuke not liking the end given he basically has a human death on his conscience now which is kind of what the whole arc was about but he had limited to no control over his actions at the time, basically the arc was leading to Yusuke getting a ‘I can kill for the greater good’ kill and instead they gave him a ‘got drunk and did some murder’ kill and it kinda sucks. Still like Koenma can probably do some shenanigans with his soul like they did Genkai, like Itsuki’s about to take his soul away so they literally can’t do that but they didn’t know he was gonna do that when they were discussing this. Sensui gives his big speech about how he never had demon friends like Yusuke does so he still had the Saturday morning cartoon morality even before he became a Spirit Detective and never had the main character talk no jutsu abilities to parse out why demons are doing shit (I hate to break it to him but it seems like 90% of demons are just kinda like ‘because it’s fun to kill’ like there are cool demons and all that but I don’t think the likelihood of the ones attacking him as a kid being like that was very high anyway), but point being he feels really shitty about murdering a Titanic-load of demons for shitty rich human assholes and wanted to die in demon world so he could like both get perspective and be some kind of martyr (it just so happens going to demon world also causes the apocalypse but DETAILS). But yeah Itsuki’s basically like ‘My gay ass is taking my self-loathing boyfriend’s corpse to another dimension because we’re not in the mood to put our weird convoluted motives on your morality spectrum’ also Sensui was gonna die in like ten days anyway, kinda random to throw in there, feels like just a random bit of tragedy to throw in for the fuck of it but at least they’re not like ‘oh he was weakened by the disease so Yusuke didn’t even fight him at full power’ no if anything it seems his death sentence hardened his resolve and made him fight harder so he could be put to rest. It’s just really funny how Itsuki’s simping so hard over Sensui he’s like ‘So my man almost caused ONE apocalypse, you guys taught him to murder terrorists so it’s your fault’ like I kind of get Sensui’s motivation by the end being so torn up by shades of gray and kind of half wanting to be proven wrong but Itsuki’s just sitting there so mad about these guys stopping a demon apocalypse and he’s gonna go take Sensui’s body and talk to it in the void forever I guess, also he somehow takes his soul too? Like I know the body and soul are linked recently after death but does Itsuki have the power to just grab the soul and keep it in the body to take to his pocket dimension and keep it away from Koenma? Either way once all that’s done Yusuke’s like ‘okay next arc let’s go kick my demon grandpa’s ass for ruining my fight’ and everyone’s just like ‘can we go have a nap first like we’ve been fighting ten episodes straight and the demon hole’s closing in a few hours we really need a break my guy’ and because Yusuke’s not the single-minded fight junkie that Goku or Ichigo are he agrees to go home with everyone and figure out the whole demon thing later.

Jujutsu Kaisen: Turns out Yuji’s job during the school festival is to be on ‘distract Todo Duty’ because fucking nobody wants to deal with that guy, which is fair, it’s like having Ichigo join your team solely as bait for Kenpachi (lot of Bleach references today) but yeah the two end up having a super manly fisticuffs fight where Yuji kinda gets his ass kicked before he answers Todo’s big ass tall girl question right and Todo has a whole ass slice of life flashback of ‘this is what you mean to me now’ constructing a friendship between him and Yuji in seconds and it’s fucking great. The rest of the Kyoto peeps show off the intros to their movesets and try to kill Yuji but Todo is not having that because if anyone’s gonna fist his new bro to death it’s gonna be him. Meanwhile the rest of Megumi’s group has figured out that literally none of the Kyoto peeps seem interested in the game they’re supposed to be playing and rush to help Yuji and start pairing off into their own little matchups for this arc which looks like it’ll be fun, like a lot of the characters seem cool but we really do need a Chunin Exams style arc where they beat the shit out of each other and cry about their backstories to really solidify this many characters because honestly we don’t have enough info on even the big players yet to really give them emotional cores. Todo stops fighting Yuji and says he wants him to become strong so they can REALLY fight and Yuji’s fresh off his ‘watched his domestic terrorist friend die because Yami Yuji’s a dick and he can’t punch peoples’ souls hard enough’ arc and really needs a win so we’re doin this folks.

Zom 100: So the first two thirds of this episode are like Aggretsuko on steroids, like I don’t want to say this isn’t real because I know this is based on real shit Black Companies do but Akira Tendo’s company makes all the ‘I hate Capitalism’ shows look like Muppet Babies (don’t ask me what that means idk) so I have to believe there’s at least some level of exaggeration in the intensity and/or scope if not the substance of the employee abuse in play here despite it being generally representative of Japanese Corporations just being fucking awful. But yeah if you’ve seen Aggretsuko you know the basic beats of how this goes, Akira has a shitty boss, shitty clients and a bunch of shitty coworkers with shitty practices that drain the life out of any employee protection policies with shitty Japanese work culture. He even has a bland moe big titty crush that only seems to like him because we’ve gotta get pairings going but she’s also banging the boss which that’s uhh… not great on several levels. But yeah, cutting to the chase assuming you’ve seen any ‘I hate Capitalism’ show (there’s been A LOT of them in recent years for some reason, no clue why…) Akira wakes up and finds there’s a zombie apocalypse and it’s kinda funny how he probably Shaun of the Dead’d his way through a lot of this shit before figuring it out. I also enjoy that it’s not necessarily like the nerd fantasy of ‘oh society has broken down so now I can be a king’, no Akira actually takes a pretty healthy approach to things despite his seeming lack of concern about the flesh-eating monsters everywhere and makes his day about emotional closure, he doesn’t revel in the collapse of society or the destruction left in the wake of the apocalypse it’s basically an eternal vacation that just happens to have zombies in it for him and I don’t fully know how long that outlook will last him but it is kinda neat seeing him Carpe the Diem and be so fucking happy about it. He quits his job, kills his boss (as you do), and confesses to his zombie crush with her titty hanging out (again, as you do) like I’ll admit I am a bit thrown by his complete denial of the world going to shit but I am excited for him and how he talks to the zombies like they’re still alive mostly for his own benefit for closure rather than any kind of philosophical reason, like it’s a completely angst-free zombie show and that’s like very strange, even High School of the Dead, as silly as the supersonic titties on that show were, had a good deal of angst despite its protagonists being invincible harem pieces, they still seemed worried about how shit was going down, Akira basically takes the Walking Dead approach of ‘yeah nothing really changed, still could die any moment, fuck it’, it’s like the meme of the nihilist saying ‘Nothing Matters’ while crying and the anti-nihilist saying ‘Nothing Matters’ with a big grin, that’s basically how I can describe Akira’s arc here, extreme anti-nihilism almost to a fault. But yeah, lots of fun, crazy colorful visuals to show how the new zombie world is Akira’s wonderland and I’m interested to see where this goes.  

Ranking of Kings: Now that everything’s good topside, Bojji takes on the mission of returning the chimeras that attacked Hilling to the underworld now that they’re not bad doggos anymore. I mean I’m pretty sure they have no idea Ouken’s been apprehended and there’s like four other Underworld fugitives they don’t have a pin on running around the castle but taking the doggos home is important too I guess. It gets kind of complicated since Domas is down there and the last time Bojji saw him he was literally trying to kill him so yeah that’s a bit rough. Meanwhile Domas and Kirito are down at the portal trying to seal it off but they don’t get to it in time I guess and the Underworld guards are there and Domas has to fight off a whole squad of them which he does, complete with ‘big guy that seems strong but goes down like the rest of them’ because that’s always a good way to spice up fighting mooks. However Desha comes through saying he wanted to fight Bosse now that he’s the size of a kid and Domas is just like ‘nah bro’ and it’s really fucking funny because Domas is trying to galaxy brain this fight by analyzing both their weapons and striking distances and Desha just kinda inches closer to him and kicks him in the nuts, like it ain’t that deep bro I guess. Meanwhile Gnasty Gnorc drops down to the Underworld (forgetting the doggos which is the whole reason why they’re here) with Bojji and Kage in hand and Bojji has a full blown Puss in Boots panic attack when he sees Domas again but Domas is just so happy that Bojji is alive he tries to do Sudoku to repent and Kirito’s just like ‘how about we just protect him instead’ and they fight for a bit before Desha takes out Gnasty Gnorc and says he’s just here to kill Miranjo because she’s the bitch that started all this and like he’s not wrong, I mean he plans on taking over the kingdom and 1v1ing their child king and shit but yeah Miranjo does seem to be the problem here though I have no doubt we’ll end up Talk No Jutsuing her though I have no idea how that’ll work given Bojji literally can’t talk but also doesn’t want to kill anyone so we’ll see how that shakes out.

Vinland Saga: Well turns out the thief girl from last episode survived and she’s now told Thorkell’s troops where Askeladd and co. are just as Thorkell’s getting antsy from the winter putting a cork in his murder spree, so now the timetable on them getting their butts in gear has been moved way up and the whole ‘slaughtering a whole village of innocent people to keep them quiet’ deal kinda fell through. Meanwhile, said deal is making the Priest feel kinda shitty about God and Canute’s like ‘fuck you, God is awesome, he’s the biggest Father and fathers are cool to their kids and shit’ right in front of Thorfinn who’s still dealing with his own daddy issues. Also turns out Canute is basically Sanji because he’s like ‘dad I wanna cook’ and his dad’s just like ‘COOK!? YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO FIGHT’ and Thorfinn gets his first meal in like probably a decade that doesn’t taste like overly salted slim jims from his king malewife. Meanwhile Askeladd’s crew is fighting with Thorkell’s scouts and they have to get the fuck out of dodge except the plan is to go FURTHER into England while also being chased by the English so Ragnar’s pissed about that and goes all Karen and asks to speak with Manager Askeladd. Turns out this was all part of Askeladd’s plan and they were really just leading him out to the front lines to stage his death so Askeladd can worm his way in and work on influencing Canute without Ragnar babying him. Ragnar tells Askeladd that in reality Canute was sent to war to die so that there would be no obstruction to his older, cooler brother taking the throne and the faction that supported Canute would fall apart and rally behind his brother. I’m no scholar for monarchys but does Canute really have any claim to the throne here like why is there a faction backing him at all if Herald is older and by birthright should be next in line and according to the weird Viking standards is better suited for the job when Canute’s main achievements are being REALLY Christian and pissing himself at the first sign of trouble? Feels like a reverse Ranking of Kings situation where the guy everyone wants for the job was next in line anyway so why was there any trouble. Anyway Ragnar dies and it’s really sad and Askeladd has to change plans and bring Canute into hiding because apparently King Dad wants to murder him for being a fucking pussy and if anyone wants to get anything out of saving the prince they have to make sure that doesn’t happen.   

[nobodysdaydreams]

Sophie I have been looking forward to hearing your thoughts on this since before the chapter was even written! THANK YOU for sparing my floorboards and writing such sweet things about my writing! 🥰🥰🥰

"Judgement Dayyyyyyyyyy / Sounds ominous"

^To Nathaniel, it is. And yes, I’m very glad to (FINALLY) be done with the flashbacks, though I’m hindsight I do think they were necessary to drive home the plot points I wanted.

"“MAYBE THINGS WOULD BE EASIER FOR YOU IF YOU WEREN’T CONSTANTLY SNEAKING AROUND, NATHANIEL”"

^maybe they would be but that’s just not how he’s used to doing things

"Ohhhhh / Milligan and Kate :( / OH HE’S ASKING THE :LKJSD> /LITERALLY JUST STARTED FLAILING AGAINST THE KEYBOARD / WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO /TRYING TO CALM DOWN NOW / Oh, come on. TELL THE TRUTH. YOU CAN DO IT. PLEASE. / Come on. Come on, buddy. You can do it. Please. / NATHANIEL / Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"

^I love everything about this reaction Sophie. It’s how I get writing it too and Nathaniel gets SO CLOSE. Ironically, he always DID call him a colleague and acquaintance (but obviously those words mean so much more that he’s not saying). And it’s so frustrating because he thinks this really IS better for everyone.

"I don’t know what I was expecting. He’s still trying to make things fit into his ridiculous worldview, even though it’s a little better. Maybe someday…"

^Indeed. The truth does have a way of coming out…

"Bods, I am giving myself nausea I am so invested in this story asjdfj / You are SO talented"

^Thank you but please don’t give yourself nausea! I don’t want anyone getting sick before finals or the holidays.

"YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO MOURN THIS. ALL OF THIS. IT’S HARD. ANYONE IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD BE SAD. STOP YOUR NONSENSE."

^Ah yes, Nathaniel “I was a bad friend so I no longer have the right to mourn the loss of that friend’s wife who was also my friend” Benedict.

"Mr. Benedict being the best dad in the middle of all this ajdskjfd /(Him and Milligan, at least. The two of them are amazing)"

^they are 🥰

"They really need to tell the adults everything. It’s not exactly helping for certain details to come out at such inopportune moments"

^And yet it’s so fun for me as a writer to bring out details at the worst and most dramatic of times 😉

"And now the secret’s out about him stealing the credit for her inventions…/ Poor Garrison. Bods, I know you said she’s been “the villain all along”, but I just feel so sad for her. She’s such a special character and you’ve developed her so much I just want to give her a hug. She shouldn’t have done some of the things she did, but all of it is interlaced with such grief and melancholy I can’t ever really be mad at her."

^Not THE villain. A villain. And one that is driven by grief and very sorry about it. Her situation is very complicated and I don’t blame you for not being mad. But you should be worried. Very worried.

Also glad you like what I’m doing with Sticky and his aunt and uncle. I was hoping I could make that likable and I’m glad you enjoy it!

"Oh. He finally let go of some of it. That probably was hard, but felt kind of good. I’m glad he could do that. /An hour? He must have actually been pretty tired. I doubt he slept that night (Given he was experiencing a 24 chapter flashback asdhjdfj /j /silly)"

^not exactly given that a lot of the flashback had information Nathaniel himself doesn’t know, but yeah, 24 chapters was a lot more than I anticipated. Again, sorry about that.

"SQ / OH, NICHOLAS DOESN’T KNOW, HERE IT COMES / “lovingly but forcefully preventing Mr. Benedict from jumping out of his seat and running off to find the nephew he’d just learned about, though he had no idea of his whereabouts” /Yep, that checks out ajsdfjd /Such a good line. You can always sum up the characters so well in just a single sentence"

^I loved writing that part. I’m so sad we never got to see it in the show. See Disney, you could have had him react to the news of having a nephew even if you couldn’t get the actor who plays SQ back!

And yes, I'm glad to see you enjoy Constance’s great piggyback strategy!

"SDFKJLDSDSFKJ:LDSFKJHDSFKJ:HDSFKJ: / SISTER TIME!!!!!!!!!!! / GOING INSANE / YOU DON’T KNOW HOW DESPERATELY I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS / I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS AND SDJFJHDSKJHDSJGD"

^ YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW LONG I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR YOU TO READ AND REACT TO THIS SOPHIE I COULD SCREAM ABOUT HER ALL DAY! 😍🥰😍🥰😍

"Wait…. / Is the sister psychic?"

^I refuse to confirm or deny any theories unless I feel like I need to reassure you I wouldn’t like. Kill off a character or something. But I do love the speculations so feel free to keep them coming! 👀

"Ohohohohoho / Fake violets!"

^I love bringing in book elements! Especially the violets because if Nicholas did that to remember a friend, wouldn't his brother have done so for the same reason? (Also: Nathaniel saying the reason he used fake violets was so that he wouldn't have to worry about them dying. I'm a monster, I know, but the symbolism is just lovely.)

"“You always did love drama and symbolism, so I suppose it does fit, perhaps as a pseudonym or an alias, but your legal name? Natty, I know method acting is a thing, but that really does take it a bit far.” /Is it bad that I think I like her a little bit too much?"

^You can like her as much as you want. Personally, I love her! Nerissa is such a fun character to create and write, and I haven't done anything for her since TOS which was almost a YEAR ago if you can believe it.

"Nessie!!!!"

^I KNOW! Imagine little two year old Nicholas calling his big sister “Nessie” 🥺. It’s too adorable!

"Afsjdkl; ads;kjasldfkj;;sdv lkj; asdf kj;lsadfkjl / YOU NEED TO STOP IT. I CAN’T KEEP ABUSING MY POOR KEYBOARD LIKE THIS"

^I will stop nothing. And speaking of nicknames, I know I mention in the discord, but the reason I freaked out when you said in your fic that Cannonball’s mom called him her “little diamond” was because Nicholas and Nathaniel’s mom called them her “little sweetheart and her little superstar”. This is a headcanon I’ve actually had for months now, so I’m very happy to have it written down at last. 💕💫

"SEYMOUR THE CAT / Bods, I am hyperventilating"

^Yep. Show!Seymour is here. It’s what the people needed.

"Oh boy. She must have a pretty impressive memory. I’m getting a little spooked"

^She does, but she was also around 11 when their parents died. That’s around how old Reynie is in the first book. So it makes sense that she’d remember a lot more. The twins were around the age Kate was when her dad left, so their memories are a lot blurrier, especially after so many years.

"Absolutely cackling that she’s shorter than him"

^As an older sibling, this is just what happens especially if you’re a girl. The younger siblings (and cousins) outgrow you, it doesn’t matter what the age gap is. But it makes the dynamic here 10x funnier.

Oh no, now he’s angry. I hope she doesn’t react badly… / OH NO. SHE’S REACTING BADLY. SHE DEFINITELY HAS SOME TRAUMA

^oh yeah. More on her trauma later… as for Nathaniel you can hardly blame him for being a little upset. He was abandoned and left on the orphanage steps by not one but TWO siblings. It happened twice. Really explains why he has so many issues, everyone leaves him in the end.

Oh! And on the subject of Nerissa leaving them, and Nathaniel remembering it happening but assuming she was his mother, if you want to know how long I've been planning this twist, here's a little snippet back from SOS chapter 5:

"Ledroptha Curtain woke up shaking and covered in sweat. He'd had another nightmare. Not that that was anything unusual. He’d been having nightmares since he was a boy, in fact he’d been having nightmares for as long as he could remember. It was always more or less the same dream too. Poor little Nathaniel Benedict losing everyone he ever loved. The details of the dreams would change though. Sometimes Curtain would dream he was back at the orphanage, begging Nicky to stay, watching Nicky get into the car with his new family, his better family, and driving away, leaving his brother forever. Other times Curtain would dream about the same situation, but it would be his mother who was leaving him this time, gently dropping a sleeping Nicholas on the orphanage doorstep and forcing Nathaniel to join him as he cried and pleaded with her not to go. [...] it was a dream- only a dream. But it had felt so real."

"Oh dear. Nathaniel… / This is starting to feel like your Christmas Carol AU, with the Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come / Only worse"

^Like I said, the symptoms are authentic (fine now though don’t worry).

"As much as she shouldn’t be hurting people, I’m kind of worried about Nerissa / (Also this reminds me of how fun and scary it was to play with her character blog!)"

^This is the vision I’ve always had for her character, so the character blog does match the writing here. Classic older sibling teasing taken a bit too far. And I’m glad you care about her because so do I 💕

"HAH. I don’t know why the adults think that politely asking the kids to stay out of it is going to work."

^But hey, at least they try

"Oh, Garrison"

^Yeah. Poor Garrison. You have no idea.

"Constance is doing good at being intimidating, but she’s just a child. She shouldn’t have this kind of pressure on her, even if it mostly self-imposed / Pushing people off the roof? Are we taking cues from Cutter now? /j /silly /affectionate"

^She and Nathaniel had separate arcs where they discovered they remind Nicholas of each other, so they are very much coming to an understanding here. The “pushing people off the roof” is hyperbole to show that Nathaniel is willing to comply and cares about Nicholas now (don’t worry I won’t have either of them turning into Cutter this is a T rated fic).

"Nicholas trying to be all surreptitious and spy on them adsjfjs"

^Nicholas: “are my daughter and brother getting along? It looks like they are, oh I knew it! 🥰”

Constance: “Harm my father, and I will kill you.”

Nathaniel: “Ugh. Fine.”

I love them.

"Ohhhhhh / They’re having a real conversation / Hugs for you, Bods /I know I haven’t really made any threats this time around, I’m just too enamoured with the story, so you and your possessions are safe for now"

^THANK YOU. Listen, Sophie, I know the angst for the first 25 chapters was a lot but that was the sad backstory. I hope that as the story goes on and the characters heal and feel and come together, that maybe, juussstttt maybe, I can get some stuff back. I’m sorry for the angst, I really am, and I’m not saying there might not be a few more little bumps in the road, but for the most part, it’s smooth sailing from here to the finish line. So… perhaps you could give me my silverware? Relinquish it from the void?

"Nicholas makes a good point. She could easily just be a raving lunatic, but Nathaniel is usually sharp enough to catch a liar"

^Exactly. And if she is a lunatic, why follow both of them before they were famous/Nathaniel started doing crime?

"I love how eager Nicholas is to hear Nathaniel’s nickname, it’s really sweet. And then Nathaniel is very upset and grumpy about it asjdfjs / It feels weird for me to see Nicholas speculate about whether or not their family used nicknames, because for me nicknames are an inherent part of family. You love someone, that just means you don’t always call them by their full name. My family rarely calls me my real name"

^I love having the Benedict’s use Nicknames 🥰🥰🥰 (though of course Nathaniel and Constance won’t stand for it). I have a few nicknames as well, and what family member gives what person a nickname says a lot (Nerissa lovingly teasing Nathaniel with his nickname vs. Nicholas being affectionate when he calls Nerissa "Nessie").

"Ohoh! And Nathaniel feels guilty about something, and he can finally share that. Very interesting… / AND HE IS HEALTHILY PUTTING HIS EMOTIONS INTO CONTEXT??? IS THERE HOPE FOR THIS MAN AFTER ALL???? /s /silly"

^I mean, I hope there’s hope for him. That’s what the fic is about. Well, part of it anyway.

I just really like that he uses the word “deduce”. It’s a good word.

^Thank you! I love that whole conversation, especially that exchange of "Wait...you didn't know it was me until you sent in the children?" and "Wait...you haven't been planning the Emergency since you were 12 solely because of what I did?" followed by "Obviously not you were keeping yourself hidden!" and "Obviously not, it's been over 30 years, other things have happened to me during that time!" The two of them have some distorted perceptions they are finally starting to undo.

"OHHHHHHHH / THEY’RE HAVING A SIBLING HEART-TO-HEART!!!!! / I have so many sibling feelings right now. I could almost see this conversation happening with me and my sib. (If one of us were trying to take over the world asjdjasdk)"

^I hope neither of you tries to do that. Please Sophie. /affectionate /lh. But I did love writing this. It took up a lot of words, but it was a conversation that needed to happen.

"I really really do love redemption stories. They are so good and I love how sometimes you can “defeat the villain” with the power of friendship. I’m always on Nicholas’ side in that matter"

^Me too. Redemption stories are the best, and I'm a sucker for them IF they are done right (Villain tries to make amends, really understands what they did wrong, accepts consequences, struggles along the way, seeks to become a better person = good. Villain is hot or cool so we forgive him = bad). But for TMBS especially, I really have a hard time writing 100% bad villains. I think it's because I have a hard time viewing real people that way. You might be 99.99% bad, but as long as you're still breathing, there's still hope for you.

"I’m so happy to see all the callbacks to TOS. It makes me ridiculously and inordinately happy to see things starting to come together"

^Again, FINALLY. It was a little frustrating this fic took so long (I put "Season 1" "mid season" and "Season 2" in as additional bullet points that ended up being most of the fic 😭) but I think that it added some stuff that was necessary and put things like Curtain's decisions, the children and the adult's views of him, what's going on with Garrison, etc. in context. Plus, since the series was cancelled, we now have a transcription of a lot (not all but a lot) of the Disney+ episodes.

"SQ TIME / I’m so happy"

^Me too. Nicholas finally knows about his nephew and how cute and wonderful he is/was.

"Nathaniel is really deep in the guilt and self-blame hole right now…"

^Oh yeah. Trust me, he is, especially when it comes to his son.

"Nicholas is always so ready to accept literally anyone into his family whereas Nathaniel has to be dragged and is so scared. Aw man, just thinking so much about them"

^To be fair to Nathaniel: his last few families haven't really worked out.

"Nicholas awkwardly asking about Curtain’s non-divorce akjdsdkjha I love it"

^I debated putting this in, but ultimately decided yes because I thought about what the characters would do. Nathaniel would not want to open up about the friends he lost, especially after everything else that day, so he wouldn't clarify whether his son was adopted or not until pressed. But Nicholas, after seeing a photo of a child that looks like his brother, and the fact that the last time he talked to his brother, his brother said he didn't want kids (granted they were 12, but still), would likely conclude that this must be his biological child. And if you found out your sibling you hadn't seen in years had a kid, and also wasn't close with a ton of people, you'd probably also have a few questions about this potential (ex?)-sister-or-brother-in-law, but it would also be a very awkward and uncomfortable question.

"PEDALIAN MY BELOVED / I’m really happy that Nathaniel gets to talk about them to someone now. I think he needs it"

^He does Sophie. He really really does. These ghosts have been following him for a long time. In many ways, they are still following him.

“you haven’t adopted any of your children” Yeah, maybe, but they’re still his children

^Dang right they are!

"I am getting more and more worried about SQ, Bods. He better be okay when we see him again…"

^In some ways yes, in some ways no. "Okay" is such a relative term Sophie. But I think you'll like some of what I decide to do with his character in the next chapter.

"Nicholas is having such a hard time accepting that it’s okay the Glenns made mistakes and Nathaniel having a hard time accepting his own mistakes in regard to SQ. THE PARALLELS, BODS, THE PARALLELS"

^THE PARALLELS! I LOVE THE PARALLELS AND I'M GLAD YOU DO TOO! 🥰🥰🥰

"ASKJLFDLKHUDF / AND VIOLET!!! VIOLET AND JOHN!!!!!! I REALLY CAN’T WAIT TO SEE HOW YOU HANDLE THEM. I REALLY LOVE THOSE CHARACTERS / I love how you connected them with the violets. Just masterful work. /I’m really curious what happened between Nicholas and the Hopefields/John. I have so many questions"

^I though you might. Hopefully I can give you some hints/answers in the next chapter... Long story short, while Nathaniel is being haunted by his son's birth parents, Nicholas has been silently battling his own ghosts. Let's just say that each Benedict sibling has a tragedy that keeps happening to them. Nathaniel's is obviously everyone leaving him, but now that his part is almost over, I think I might have a little fun with Nicky and Nessie. :)

"YEAH. PEDALIAN IS STILL HAUNTING THE NARRATIVE AKFDHDSFJJK"

^You have no idea.

"I AM TOO EMOTIONS TO GIVE YOU NOTES FOR THE ENDING / IT’S JUST TOO MUCH"

^That's perfectly alright. This chapter was a LOT and I'm grateful for whatever notes you can give me. Thanks Sophie!

"WHOOOO!!!!!!!!! That was amazing, as usual. My brain is exploding. So, so many things. Most of this was a “live reaction”, save for the last scene because I got too excited and read ahead without stopping for notes. I just want you to know that I am beyond ecstatic to learn more about what you have planned. I cannot wait. You are such a wonderfully talented human, and I adore your thoughts and ideas. Thank you so, so, so much for sharing them <3"

^As always, thank you Sophie! I can't tell you how much I appreciate your commentary, I always look forward to it. You are fantastic, and hopefully I can have the next chapter for you soon.

@nobodysdaydreams Come get your Notes!!!

(School is being. A Lot. But y'all know the drill: S.O.S., Amzing, Go read it, thank you)

Judgement Dayyyyyyyyyy

Sounds ominous

Flashback wrap up!! Yay!

MAYBE THINGS WOULD BE EASIER FOR YOU IF YOU WEREN’T CONSTANTLY SNEAKING AROUND, NATHANIEL

Ohhhhh

Milligan and Kate :( 

OH HE’S ASKING THE :LKJSD>

LITERALLY JUST STARTED FLAILING AGAINST THE KEYBOARD

WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

TRYING TO CALM DOWN NOW

Oh, come on. TELL THE TRUTH. YOU CAN DO IT. PLEASE.

Come on. Come on, buddy. You can do it. Please.

NATHANIEL

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I don’t know what I was expecting. He’s still trying to make things fit into his ridiculous worldview, even though it’s a little better. Maybe someday…

Bods, I am giving myself nausea I am so invested in this story asjdfj

You are SO talented

Oh dear

Milligan’s wife

YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO MOURN THIS. ALL OF THIS. IT’S HARD. ANYONE IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD BE SAD. STOP YOUR NONSENSE.

Mr. Benedict being the best dad in the middle of all this ajdskjfd

(Him and Milligan, at least. The two of them are amazing)

They really need to tell the adults everything. It’s not exactly helping for certain details to come out at such inopportune moments

And now the secret’s out about him stealing the credit for her inventions…

Poor Garrison. Bods, I know you said she’s been “the villain all along”, but I just feel so sad for her. She’s such a special character and you’ve developed her so much I just want to give her a hug. She shouldn’t have done some of the things she did, but all of it is interlaced with such grief and melancholy I can’t ever really be mad at her.

Calling Sticky!!!

That detail makes me such warm and fuzzies. You couldn’t compromise the integrity of the plot to have him there, but they call him every chance they get and he’s genuinely caring about them and wanting to know everyone’s okay <3

Sticky’s Aunt and Uncle Mention!!!!

(They are just barely below Isaac on my list of people who are not at all major characters but I care about probably way too much)

Oh. He finally let go of some of it. That probably was hard, but felt kind of good. I’m glad he could do that.

An hour? He must have actually been pretty tired. I doubt he slept that night (Given he was experiencing a 24 chapter flashback asdhjdfj /j /silly)

SQ

OH, NICHOLAS DOESN’T KNOW, HERE IT COMES

“lovingly but forcefully preventing Mr. Benedict from jumping out of his seat and running off to find the nephew he’d just learned about, though he had no idea of his whereabouts”

Yep, that checks out ajsdfjd

Such a good line. You can always sum up the characters so well in just a single sentence

Constance’s turn!!

“The humility will help him grow”

Y’know what? Sure. That makes sense. Good plan asdfkj

SDFKJLDSDSFKJ:LDSFKJHDSFKJ:HDSFKJ:

SISTER TIME!!!!!!!!!!!

GOING INSANE

YOU DON’T KNOW HOW DESPERATELY I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS

I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS AND SDJFJHDSKJHDSJGD

Wait….

Is the sister psychic?

Ohohohohoho

Fake violets!

“You always did love drama and symbolism, so I suppose it does fit, perhaps as a pseudonym or an alias, but your legal name? Natty, I know method acting is a thing, but that really does take it a bit far.”

Is it bad that I think I like her a little bit too much?

Nessie!!!!

Afsjdkl; ads;kjasldfkj;;sdv lkj; asdf kj;lsadfkjl 

YOU NEED TO STOP IT. I CAN’T KEEP ABUSING MY POOR KEYBOARD LIKE THIS

SEYMOUR THE CAT

Bods, I am hyperventilating

Oh boy. She must have a pretty impressive memory. I’ getting a little spooked

Absolutely cackling that she’s shorter than him

Oh no, now he’s angry. I hope she doesn’t react badly…

OH NO. SHE’S REACTING BADLY. SHE DEFINITELY HAS SOME TRAUMA

Oh dear. Nathaniel…

This is starting to feel like your Christmas Carol AU, with the Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come

Only worse

As much as she shouldn’t be hurting people, I’m kind of worried about Nerissa

(Also this reminds me of how fun and scary it was to play with her character blog!)

HAH. I don’t know why the adults think that politely asking the kids ot stay out of it is going to work.

Oh, Garrison

Constance is doing good at being intimidating, but she’s just a child. She shouldn’t have this kind of pressure on her, even if it mostly self-imposed

Pushing people off the roof? Are we taking cues from Cutter now? /j /silly /affectionate

Nicholas trying to be all surreptitious and spy on them adsjfjs

Ohhhhhh

They’re having a real conversation

Hugs for you, Bods

I know I haven’t really made any threats this time around, I’m just too enamoured with the story, so you and your possessions are safe for now

Nicholas makes a good point. She could easily just be a raving lunatic, but Nathaniel is usually sharp enough to catch a liar

I love how eager Nicholas is to hear Nathaniel’s nickname, it’s really sweet. And then Nathaniel is very upset and grumpy about it asjdfjs

It feels weird for me to see Nicholas speculate about whether or not their family used nicknames, because for me nicknames are an inherent part of family. You love someone, that just means you don’t always call them by their full name. My family rarely calls me my real name

Ohoh! And Nathaniel feels guilty about something, and he can finally share that. Very interesting…

AND HE IS HEALTHILY PUTTING HIS EMOTIONS INTO CONTEXT??? IS THERE HOPE FOR THIS MAN AFTER ALL???? /s /silly

I just really like that he uses the word “deduce”. It’s a good word.

OHHHHHHHH

THEY’RE HAVING A SIBLING HEART-TO-HEART!!!!!

I have so many sibling feelings right now. I could almost see this conversation happening with me and my sib. (If one of us were trying to take over the world asjdjasdk)

I really really do love redemption stories. They are so good and I love how sometimes you can “defeat the villain” with the power of friendship. I’m always on Nicholas’ side in that matter

I’m so happy to see all the callbacks to TOS. It makes me ridiculously and inordinately happy to see things starting to come together

SQ TIME

I’m so happy

Nathaniel is really deep in the guilt and self-bame hole right now…

Nicholas is always so ready to accept literally anyone into his family whereas Nathaniel has to be dragged and is so scared. Aw man, just thinking so much about them

Nicholas awkwardly asking about Curtain’s non-divorce akjdsdkjha I love it

PEDALIAN MY BELOVED

I’m really happy that Nathaniel gets to talk about them to someone now. I think he needs it

“you haven’t adopted any of your children” Yeah, maybe, but they’re still his children

I am getting more and more worried about SQ, Bods. He better be okay when we see him again…

Nicholas is having such a hard time accepting that it’s okay the Glenns made mistakes and Nathaniel having a hard time accepting his own mistakes in regard to SQ. THE PARALLELS, BODS, THE PARALLELS

ASKJLFDLKHUDF

AND VIOLET!!!

VIOLET AND JOHN!!!!!! I REALLY CAN’T WAIT TO SEE HOW YOU HANDLE THEM. I REALLY LOVE THOSE CHARACTERS

I love how you connected them with the violets. Just masterful work.

I’m really curious what happened between Nicholas and the Hopefields/John. I have so many questions

YEAH. PEDALIAN IS STILL HAUNTING THE NARRATIVE AKFDHDSFJJK

I AM TOO EMOTIONS TO GIVE YOU NOTES FOR THE ENDING

IT’S JUST TOO MUCH

WHOOOO!!!!!!!!! That was amazing, as usual. My brain is exploding. So, so many things. Most of this was a “live reaction”, save for the last scene because I got too excited and read ahead without stopping for notes. I just want you to know that I am beyond ecstatic to learn more about what you have planned. I cannot wait. You are such a wonderfully talented human, and I adore your thoughts and ideas. Thank you so, so, so much for sharing them <3

[kiirotoao]

Byler and Confrontation

I feel like I’m stating the obvious, but there’s really something about the way that Mike and Will argue that make their personalities and thoughts stand out. So much.

And I’m not even talking about the “It’s not my fault you don’t like girls!” or the “And us?” “We’re friends! We’re friends.”

The thought that struck me today was much more meta but still just as revealing, in my opinion.

Truly, when we look at the Byler fights, they’re fighting, right? They’re mad at each other. Then how do their fights by concept manage to make them seem so compatible? Why does their arguing give off the impression of love despite no outright, “I love you” to be heard? Why do we as the audience root for them to stick together despite their moments of splitting apart? Well, I think that a lot of it comes down to who Mike and Will are in regards to confrontation.

For one, Mike hates confrontation. Fights in general. We focus on him mouthing, “stop it!” when Billy and Steve fight. While Dustin, Lucas, and Max are pleading similarly, I find it interesting how the camera focuses on Mike when the fighting gets more intense.

Then of course there’s Mike covering his ears when he’s scared, no doubt a reflex to loud sounds and particularly yells, such as Will screaming.

We also very quickly see this in the shoot out scene in season 4 when Mike panics and covers his head.

And throughout the show, as much as his expression is funny, Mike clearly shows distaste towards arguing, especially if what people are saying to him seem pointless, sudden, unfounded, or wrong.

Mike is a leader as well as a team player and defender, and he doesn’t want to hurt people. Yes, he does argue and confront, not denying that, but time and time again, we see that he doesn’t do it unless he’s prompted.

Now, there’s Will. Will lives confrontation. His main propensity in the beginning of season 4 centers around calling out people for being ridiculous. That goes for Mike, El, and even Jonathan.

Tied to his confrontational attitude comes sass. I won’t try to fit every moment into this post (but I’ll certainly make an entire separate post on Will’s lovable sass haha), but one of my favorite examples is in season 1, believe it or not, when Will replies to Joyce’s question on why he uses fireballs: “Well, yeah, to burn them to a crisp.”

Even though that isn’t a personal confrontation, we see that Will is able to characterize his cleric with sass and boldness, sweetly smiling at his fictional enemies’ demise. I think that Will’s fearlessness is overlooked, subsumed by his constant turmoil, but truly, this boy packs a punch, and he isn’t afraid to face people with honesty.

And to look even further in Mike and Will’s histories with confrontation, both of them have had it pretty rough with their families. Namely, their dads.

In seasons 1 and 2, we see it illustrated through the Wheeler family dinners how Mike has lived his fair share of being shut down by his dad.

Mike doesn’t fight with his dad. Doesn’t confront. He makes an attempt each time to reason with his parents, but his dad ultimately shuts him down. So Mike either walks away or sits and stays silent.

Will, on the other hand, we don’t see with Lonnie explicitly, thank goodness. But what we do see is him overhearing Lonnie and Joyce fighting. In this flashback, we learn that Lonnie never does anything Will likes, and Jonathan encourages Will not to pretend to enjoy that poor treatment.

And while Will seems to be somewhat naturally quiet, I think that there’s also a spirit of quiet indignation that he’s rightfully and righteously grown through moments like these.

So, all of this to say, Mike is non-confrontational while Will is confrontational. That’s how they’ve been built as characters.

So how does this play into Byler? Well, look no further than their arguments in season 3 chapter 3 and season 4 chapter 2. The non-confrontational Mike meets the confrontationist Will. Things go according to character: Will is calling Mike out on his behavior and ignorance and Mike is leveling it and bearing it as he lets Will talk.

But then, both times they fight, the canvas is flipped. Mike ends up being the final word while Will is left speechless.

These reactions are heartbreaking. They’re supposed to be. They show Will’s defeat and Mike’s regret. They show how much their words affect each other and actively change the way they normally face confrontation.

They could have brushed each other off, in fact, they both had the opportunity in both fights to let the other leave (Will could have biked off without another word from Mike and Lucas in season 3 and Will could have let Mike continue looking for El in season 4). But they didn’t let each other leave. They engaged with each other and made known what was on their hearts in the moment.

So what make Mike and Will so important to each other is that they take each other’s words seriously, to the point that they aren’t afraid to be vulnerable and show each other what makes them upset, upset enough to respectively gain or lose their air of non/confrontation. And even though they don’t say “I’m saying this because I love you” outright, it’s clear that they mean as such because they’re ultimately trying to better each other and understand each other in any way they can, raw and hurtful as it is.

So maybe at first glance, this sounds toxic. Why would I call their raw and hurtful arguing positive and bettering and basically a big, unsaid “I love you?” Well, the thing is that Mike and Will don’t continue arguing. Notice their reactions after each one:

They know that they aren’t being themselves when they argue - they know! After both fights, Will falls into somber reflection, and Mike hastens to apologize.

And what gets me is that fact that the canvas of confrontation flips for their apologies, too. Confrontationist Will takes the pain but the non-confrontational Mike initiates the apologies. Both times. And suddenly, Mike having the final word and Will being left speechless isn’t sad anymore. It’s quite the opposite, actually.

What’s even sweeter is how we see them grow from season 3 to season 4. Where the argument is largely ignored in season 3 because of the Mind Flayer, in season 4, they address their argument and explicitly conclude that they want to be friends. “Best friends.”

So despite the emotional damage they inflict on each other, they come together by the end of it, closer than ever. They want to realign their relationship that’s thrown out of equilibrium. They want to stick together. This proves to me that they have undeniable love for each other and an integral bond (and I don’t know about you, but I think integrity is a major sign of relationship compatibility).

At the end of the day, even without fully looking at what they say in their confronting one another, you can see it in the intimate concept of their emotional separation followed by faithful rectification; they love each other. They know each other. Even at their lowest, even though they face confrontation so differently, they ultimately want to support each other. They pursue each other and choose to stand beside each other.

So yeah. If you ask me, Byler is endgame.

Thank you for coming to my completely unprompted, brainrot-induced TED talk lmao