#though my relatives are making most of the plans so maybe it'll be fine?

[viktuurionice]

I was able to give myself blonde tips on my hair today. It's not as much as I wanted but it worked better than my last attempt, it looks like a gradient, and I'm actually pretty happy with it. Might try to lighten it a little more in a month or so but dye does kinda fade over time so maybe I won't really need to?

Main point being I have some form of gradient back in my hair and I'm happier with it than I was. I'm trying to keep my hair natural tones and grow it out for when I move. I miss having pink or purple hair though. (I also desperately want to cut it. And while I could get it cut shorter, it's the hairstyles I like that would be the problem.) I just don't really want to get in trouble/scolded by relatives when I move and sometimes colorful hair is hard to undo. So bleached tips and natural hair it isssss

[hellhoundmaggie]

Fun facts about Clone Trooper Dice

My husband is talking about running a Star Wars: Saga Edition TTRPG campaign, and I was so Bad Batch-brained I just had to make a rogue clone PC

I named him Dice because he’s a TTRPG character

In-universe his brothers named him Dice ironically because he always loses at dice games

His official designation, CT-4287, is a keyboard smash

He’s got two tattoos on either side of his forehead: a 6-sided die showing 1 pip on the left, a die showing 6 pips on the right

During the Clone Wars he wore a quiff haircut. Afterwards he grew it out and started putting it in a man bun

In the SWSE system Dice is a lvl 1 Human Soldier — probably gonna multi-class into Scout or Scoundrel and go for a Prestige class. Likely Bounty Hunter or Gunslinger, but it'll depend on party comp

I used Point Buy to give him above-average attributes in everything but Charisma. Dice officially has no rizz

I plan to have him pick up Stealth, but never the Deception skill. Clones are consistently bad at lying in the canon and Dice will maintain that tradition

But I gave him Mechanics and Use Computer so he can be the technology guy. Maybe he'll pick up Piloting too. Again, party comp

Dice is a relatively inexperienced soldier — only been on one or two serious campaigns before Order 66

Dice knows the clones got a raw deal from the Republic, but he blames the Senate for that, not the Jedi or the ordinary citizens

He still saw it as his duty to protect the citizens from the consequences of the war, and respected the Jedi for doing their best to lead with compassion under the circumstances

He served under my friend’s Jedi PC (as yet unnamed) and trusts her implicitly.

Husband is talking about running a Clone Wars solo adventure for Dice and I am excited to see how that goes!

Anyway, Dice’s inhibitor chip malfunctioned when Order 66 came down. He managed to not only resist the urge to kill Jedi PC, but also to help her escape the Purge

Now they’re on the run from the Empire together

Even though he had to kill a bunch of them helping Jedi PC escape, Dice still loves his brothers. But as far as he knows he’s the only clone who isn’t loyal to the Empire, so he hasn’t reached out to any of them

The inhibitor chip hasn’t failed completely. Sometimes Dice feels the urge to Follow Orders like a Good Soldier and kill Jedi PC

He hasn’t told Jedi PC because 1) he doesn't want to admit weakness and 2) he’s afraid she’ll abandon him

Dice wants Jedi PC to rely on him because he relies so much on her. She's the closest thing to family he has now that he's deserted

Plus he trusts her Force powers

Dice has no idea inhibitor chips exist. As far as he knows there is no cure for the urge to Follow Orders and he'll just have to manage until the day he or Jedi PC dies

So he's turned to drinking in secret to control it

Dice drank excessively before Order 66, but only when he was partying with his brothers. It was something he did to fit in, not an everyday coping mechanism

Dice started out drinking at cantinas, but that got expensive and money’s tight. After a while he built a still and put it behind a hidden panel next to his bunk in the party's ship

The urge mostly comes at night -- or what passes for night in space -- when there's less to think about. So Dice pops open the panel and fills his cup from the still

That's how he falls asleep most of the time. Lately he's needed to drink more just to manage that. But it's fine, he'll handle it (it's not fine, he's not going to handle it)

On a lighter note, Dice enjoys sweets, tinkering, arguing about machines, and sitting in companionable silence

[akuaya-eng]

(Main story) Chapter 5 - Episode 7

- DEVIL'S WORK -

Rosé

Big bro, you called for me~? I'm busy as always.

Vanis

Sorry for being late. Rosé caught me nearby and wasted some of my time.

Rosé

Oh come on, blaming me? You looked like you had something to say.

Vanis

That's just Rosé's imagination.

Adder

… Late and noisy. And you should knock before entering a room. Why can't you do what mere humans can?

Vanis

… Oh, Tuner is here too. Are you enjoying yourself in the Devil World?

Rosé

It looks like you're still unsatisfied, right? Alright, maybe I'll lend a hand!

Vanis

What are you planning to do?

Rosé

Remember that tiger I caught on the way back? I've got an idea for it. It'll be a playmate for our bored Tuner here ♪

Vanis

...Hey, you. Maybe it's better to run away now.

Adder

…Are you done talking nonsense? Speak more than necessary again and I'll make you a wandering curse around this mansion. Got it?

Rosé

Got it!

Vanis

Sorry… What's this about?

Adder

...It's about the Gloriosa family. If they're really planning to cause a calamity, it's a problem. If their reputation rises, itcould interfere with the Belladonna family's rule over the Devil World.

Vanis

Causing calamities is an important duty for devil… Or so it was said. It would be a long-awaited achievement for the lackluster Gloriosa.

Adder

They couldn't possibly achieve it alone, but it seems like someone is playing tricks on me. Regardless, we can't just sit back and watch them cause a calamity.

Rosé

Huh~!? Stop them!? I have a plan…

Vanis

You're still not giving up? The original plan would've failed if Adder found out.

Rosé

I don't know about that. I don't think anything will happen yet.

Adder

Hah, seems like it won't be much fun. Don't worry, Rosé. I'll give you another job.

Rosé

Another job!? But I'm busy with my research~!!

Adder

Listen to what I say and don't question it. Remember, you have no right to refuse.

Rosé

Fine~… I can't help it... Alright~... what's the job then~?

Adder

Go to Espada's place. And…

Rosé

Huh!? Espada's place!? Why didn't you say so earlier~ ♡ Oh, Big bro is so good at teasing ♪ Meeting Pada means business or maybe… a feast ♪ Oh, I'm looking forward to seeing Pada after so long. I bet he'll make the most adorable face of disgust when he sees me. Ah, just imagining it gives me chills.

Vanis

Rosé really likes Espada, huh.

Rosé

Of course! Pada is my one and only cute little brother. I just can't help but want to spoil him. He's scared of me and always runs away pitifully. That face he makes is just precious… So, I wonder if he's coming back home soon. Seems like he's really into that bastard. Wonder what he finds so appealing about him? Maybe he'll come back if I kill Dia.

Adder

Don't talk lightly about killing your own kind. Even you should understand that much.

Rosé

… Big bro really has a sharp mind. You don't get my witty jokes!

Vanis

He's always like this. I understand why Espada might not want to come back. Anyway, Adder. Making him run errands as punishment essentially is getting away with it. The current head of the Belladonna family, which rules the Devil World, is too soft on his relatives.

Adder

Don't you get it yet, Vanis? This is an opportunity for Belladonna. Rosé has actually made a contribution in hindsight.

Rosé

Am I being praised right now? Can you praise me a bit more?

Adder

Don't get ahead of yourself. Remember, your life was spared by a thread. Even though you're family, if I judge you useless, I won't hesitate to dispose of you.

Rosé

Yes, understood ♪ Big bro is very kind ♡ So, what should I do after meeting Pada?

Adder

… Cause a calamity using the bastard. Have Espada cooperate with that.

Vanis

…!

Rosé

Ooh ♪

Adder

Steal the calamity the Gloriosa family is planning. Not just steal it, make it grander. By causing a massive calamity, the power of the Belladonna family will become even more formidable than before.

Rosé

As expected of big bro! It sounds even more fun than I thought~.

Vanis

Using Dia-kun…? That's quite a plan.

Tuner

(thinking) Using Dia to cause a calamity...!? That's so terrifying… We have to stop it…! But…

Spirit of Wisdom

… Yes. We must not stop it.

Tuner

…!

Spirit of Wisdom

You're a good kid. You understand that you must not stop it yourself. Causing calamities is among the devils' deeds. To stop it would be to interfere with them.

Tuner

Can I only silently watch?

Spirit of Wisdom

That's right. That's your job as a Tuner.

Adder

What's wrong, Tuner? You look pale. Scared? For us, causing calamities is an honor. With this, the Belladonna family's foundation will become even more sturdy. Causing a calamity with our own hands is showing our power as devils. It actively shows our power to the world.

Tuner

………

Adder

Viewing the beginning of a calamity is a privilege. Think of it that way, it's a great honor. Now, you will capture Dia. We must secure him before the angels do. Don't screw this up. Show us that you're at least somewhat useful.

Vanis

Hehe, that's a big task. Got it.

Adder

What are you doing, Rosé? Hurry up and head to Colchicum.

Rosé

Understood ♪ Lemme dress up and go~.

Vanis

We need to secure Dia before he gets caught by them… It's going to be quite a tough job. Let's set up a teleportation magic circle somewhere suitable--

Curse's voice

Ad...der…lea...der…!

Vanis

… Sigh. Looks like the source is that long desk.

Adder

I'm busy. Purify it however you see fit.

Vanis

Is this also part of our mission this time? Honestly, the way they treat people… Let's just get it done quickly.

[www-artforoddballs]

Alright, so notice. Most of you probably know this, since you're following me for the Autistic Levi stuff (thank you, we're closing in on 100 followers!!!!), but people with autism can have "tantrums". I've kinda touched on this in a previous post (it's a full meltdown, but you can see that post here https://www-artforoddballs.tumblr.com/post/644803780958879744/autistic-levi-angstkinda-i-guess-this-is-him). For those of you who DON'T know, an autistic tantrum is not the same thing as what you'd think of in regards to a toddler or kid, it's just the word used for it. This is a mistake my mother and I made when getting the paperwork done while I was going through testing that later got cleared up lol

I had a tantrum yesterday, and so I figured that I could post about Leviathan having a tantrum, since it's still ready on my mind. I don't care if anyone else is proud of me for coping with it as well as I did, since it's a major improvement from last time I had one, but I am proud of myself!...with that in mind, here we go!!

There will be some angst in this post, like the last post in relation to this one, but like the last post, it turns out fine.

However.

Trigger warning for things such as self harm, both physical and verbal. If you or a loved one is self harming, either reach out to someone for help or reach out to that person to help, yeah?

OK on with the post.

-------------

First of all, Levi's autism is part of why his brothers always agree to help when there's a raffle for tickets or something like that on the DDD messages, because he can get overwhelmed if they don't at least help, even if he doesn't win in the end.

They figured out that his autism was the culprit for this shortly after his diagnosis.

Now when I'm writing for Levi, I like to think that his diagnosis was around the early 1990s since, while autism was a separate diagnosis in 1980, it didn't really start becoming fairly accepted and expanded upon until 1987. Hence why everyone is mostly used to it by now, but are still sometimes off put by his odd behavior; for them, as beings that have been around since...the beginning of the universe, pretty much as far as we know, but for at LEAST since humans were around (so at VERY least 2.5 million years now, but potentially up to around 7 million years (if they haven't been around since the beginning of creation)), this would be like...I dunno, give me a second.

Waiting

Waiting...

Okay, so from 1990(earliest year I have in mind) to 2019 (the year it was released) is 29 years. That's a minimum of 1/86,206.89th of their lifespan, and a maximum of 1/475,862,068.96th of their total lifetime.

So this is a VERY recent development for them on the grand scheme of things, but I digress.

So they're still figuring everything out, especially as the human race continues to learn about the condition itself.

So the first time Levi threw a tantrum and they recognized it for what it was...it was certainly interesting.

What had happened was exactly the situation described; Levi had wanted to go to a concert in the human world and they were raffling off free tickets. Except, unlike now, his brothers hadn't offered their support. They hadn't in the past, why would this time be any different?

Except now they viewed it through a different light. Leviathan had an image in his head that he desired so badly and had asked his brothers to support him, hopeful, only to be rejected at every turn. That he was used to, but it was still upsetting.

He put that to the side, though. He really wanted to see this band, and these were VIP tickets where you got to hang out with the band for a few hours after the concert! They'd cost a LOT of human money, and while they COULD afford it, he knew Lucifer would be bringing hell down upon him if he used that amount of family funds on a concert. And his anxiety was already somewhat raised, so he decided to enter the raffle on his own.

He sat there for hours, waiting for the results to come in. He'd hyped this up in his brain the entire time; He'd win, go to an amazing concert, have dinner with the band, maybe even make some friends....!...and then the results came back. He hadn't won.

As per usual, our snek boi went into one of his rants about how unfair it was, but instead of going on a rampage or something like that, locked himself up in his room and cried, hating himself for getting so excited over nothing.

As I mentioned before, I've made another post about a tantrum/getting too overwhelmed slipping into something even more dire, as that's almost always what happens to me. This would be in the 90s, so this would be their first real incident with one of these moments where they had the proper diagnosis, so bear with me, there will be some angst here, but like the other post, it'll be fine.

So Mammon ends up feeling bad for rejecting his little brother, and, not knowing it was too late, decided to go to his room and offer his support. It was almost Leviathan's birthday anyways, and Mammon knew how rejection felt and how much it sucked. So, he knocked on Leviathan's door.

No response. He knocked again...still no response, but a quiet sob.

Right away, Mammon switched from semi-carefree to worried. "Levi...?"

Again, no response. He decided to just go in and check on his brother...

The door was locked. And he smelled blood.

"Leviathan, I need you to open the door," Mammon said with a half hearted chuckle, his voice now becoming slightly strained. "Because if ya don't, I'm gonna have t' break the door down."

"Just go away!" Leviathan cried from inside his room. "Just leave me alone, you jerk!"

"I ain't goin' anywhere. Either open the door or I'm gonna break it down. Those are your two choices."

A moment of silence, before Mammon sighs, stretching, as he transforms into his demon form.

"Alright, option two it is."

He rammed into the door repeatedly, before the wood finally splintered and fell to the ground with a loud thud. Mammon quickly looked around, eyes widening as he saw Leviathan digging his own sharpened nails into his arms, multiple raked wounds, made by the same culprit, carved into his skin.

"Levi...look at ya..." Mammon said, voice faltering, tears welling up in his eyes. "I...how long has..."

"Just shut up! Don't act like you care about me, I'm the freak of our family, remember?! I'm the one whose brain isn't right, I'm just a shut-in, good for nothing, re-!"

He was quickly cut off by Mammon going to him and hugging him.

"I don't care who you are. You talk about my brother like that again and I'll kill you. Alright? You're a little off, but you ain't a freak, and your brain works just fine as is. You're perfect just the way you are, and if anybody else says any different, I'm gonna beat them the fuck up. Including you. Got that? So what if you've got that fancy lable on ya now...? Labels like that matter, but it didn't change ya. You're still my cringe, annoying as hell little weirdo of a brother...and I wouldn't have ya any other way."

Leviathan fully listened to Mammon talk, before clinging to him, breaking down sobbing again, and trying to explain what happened through his tears, the older demon gently rubbing his back and allowing him to cry it out, making sure no more harm was done.

A while later, once Levi had calmed down, Mammon ruffled his hair.

"Let's get you cleaned up, yeah? Lucifer is already gonna kill me for breaking your door, but he'd be even more pissed if I just left you here with those wounds."

So they did. And Mammon, after telling a VERY angry Lucifer what had happened hours later, had surprisingly NOT gotten chewed out by the eldest brother. Instead, that day, the entire family had a long discussion, and they all agreed that if it was something as small as entering a raffle, or even if it was bigger but not an inconvenience to anyone in the slightest, they'd all help out from then on. It's not like it was hard, and it would save Levi from hours of stress and negativity toward himself and others around him.

They also made a plan for if a tantrum were to happen while someone was around, or if he became too overwhelmed and started to spiral...because, as annoying as he could be, Leviathan was still family. And they loved him, oddities and all.

---------------

Alright, so...that was the post! I hope it was okay. I know I've written about this type of thing before a little, but different situations can end up with the same negative outcome, like being in an overwhelming situation, or not being able to change your thinking and not easily being able to get over your expectations. I've personally suffered with both, and it's a regular thing for me, so I like writing about it, because maybe, just maybe, it'll help someone out, or help someone that isn't autistic understand a friend or relative or classmate or employee better. And I love these characters, I really do. The only ironic thing is that I see so much of myself in Leviathan, but I adore him and despise myself. Go figure 😂

Regardless, I hope you enjoyed, and if there's anything you guys have questions about (in regards to me and my experience), or any specific writing requests, asks are fully open!

Thanks so much for being here to support me, you have no idea how much it means to a little oddball such as myself.

[cblgblog]

Imagine Mildolyn, "Illicit Affair", Modern AU. Where Gwen's campaigning for Congress and all the meet and greets, showing up for charities for publicity, her 'cause'. At one for special needs children and their foundation she meets a very young CNA named Mildred and sort of falls head over heels in the dumbest of ways, both just love struck. Except she's campaigning to be in Congress, she's a politician, she cannot be queer and chasing after 19 year old ex-foster kids whos brothers are set to be the youngest executed on Death Row in California in decades for appalling crimes. But there she is, in hotel rooms her supporters pay for, with someone she shouldn't be with, trying to find ways to overturn cases that turned stomachs with their brutality, because a pretty girl smiled at her and called her 'ma'am' while showing her around the foundation/care home she worked at with children no one else had the time/patience to care for. Of course it goes terribly with 'dirty little secret' vibes, the breast cancer diagnosis announced on twitter before she tells Mildred in person, even if it's such a minor case ('so they say') and caught so early that it'll barely leave a scar, radiation won't be much of a deal at all. She doesn't get to tell Mildred that, she just gets to hear on Fox news about how the democrat's gonna die a horrible death and panic.

Mildred who has no patience for politicians and their fake concern, using patients as photo ops. It’s manipulative, it’s distracting to the staff, it’s awful, okay, she hates it. She is, in fact, a tad bit rude to Gwen when they meet. Gets her a death glare from Betsy Bucket, gets Gwen intrigued.

“Republican?” only half-joking.

“No.”

“Is it the suit? Should I have worn a different suit? I wanted to, but I’ve been told this one tested better.”

“The suit is fine.” It’s more than that, actually, but Mildred will not be saying that aloud, nope, uh-uh. “I don’t much care for politicians.”

“Ah, we have that in common then.”

“I doubt we have much of anything in common. Ma’am.”

And look, Gwen doesn’t usually go in for the chasing, the hard to get. She’s got enough trouble chasing votes. But this woman is so good with the kids on her ward, so patient. She’s got Disney scrubs on and as much as she’s got no time at all for Gwen, she seems to have infinite amounts for those kids. She stays with them individually, longer than any of the other staff Gwen sees, but she still manages to get a dozen things done in half as many minutes. And she’s also gorgeous, there’s that.

And Gwen has no good reason to ask her out for lunch. Honestly, none. Nothing good can come from this. Mildred asks if the citizens of California will be paying for this meal and Gwen swears that isn’t the case, no, absolutely not. Even still, Gwen doesn’t expect Mildred to say yes. She doesn’t think Mildred expected Mildred to say yes.

But she does. Tells herself it’s for Edmund, maybe this’ll be the one politician who listens, who’s willing to look past the surface facts, willing to help. Except she gets there and they don’t talk about Edmund. It’s not because Mildred doesn’t know how to bring it up, she’s made her case dozens of times. She just…they don’t talk about him, and that feels like a betrayal, but Gwen’s kind and funny and fascinating (much to Mildred’s annoyance), and she just…doesn’t feel like getting into it.

Meanwhile Trevor, Gwen’s campaign manager/law school buddy/best friend/lavender marriage soulmate, if they were in a different time, is like bitch, what’re you doing? Yes, everyone knows you’re gay as hell, but you can’t be chasing girls right now, you can’t afford to be distracted. You especially can’t afford to look distracted. And you can’t be robbing the cradle while looking distracted.

“She’s not that young.”

“Uh-huh. She wears Winnie the Pooh clothes.”

“Scrubs, those are scrubs. Scrubs aren’t clothes.”

“Uh-huh.”

“She works in a children’s ward, Trevor.”

“Uh-huh. I really wish you wouldn’t do this, but since you care nothing about me and my mental state and all the hours and hours of hard work I’ve put in for you—”

“After badgering me into hiring you over someone more qualified.”

“Hey! More qualified. I resent that. Anyway, if you insist on ruining my day, at least wear that face cream I gave you. Should make you look less like you’re robbing the cradle.”

“Go to hell.”

“And don’t do the oyster thing. Not on a first date, in the middle of the campaign.”

“It’s not a date, it’s just lunch.”

“Uh-huh.”

Gwen doesn’t do the oyster thing. Not on the first date, which neither of them acknowledge as a date, for entirely different reasons. But then there’s a second and a third, and sex, lots of sex, and it’s harder to pass off as just friendly.

And yeah, the sneaking around that Gwen hates. That Mildred says she doesn’t mind, and she actually doesn’t seem to all that much, which Gwen finds slightly concerning. Mildred’s good with secrets though, she’s good with being kept a secret. Mostly. Which again, Gwen finds concerning.

There’s pillow talk and Mildred admitting more about herself than she has to anyone, ever. Which still isn’t nearly as much as what Gwen admits, but it’s a relative thing. And still, Mildred doesn’t talk about Edmund. Gwen finds that one out on her own, stumbles across some old photos, a scrapbook of Edmund’s crimes. Gwen’s briefly concerned that Mildred is one of those people who’re deeply attracted to serial killers, but the truth is…something else.

Mildred tells her things. Some of the deeper, darker stuff, but not much, not yet. Tells her how she’s written to everyone she can think of because he’s a boy, okay? He was in an impossible situation, they both were, no one ever helped them, so Edmund decided he had to die. No one helped them before, no one helps them now. There’s anger and tears and Gwen holding her and she can’t help asking why Mildred didn’t talk to her sooner, if she’s had no problem asking for help from strangers.

“Because you aren’t,” Mildred says in a way that makes it clear she’s figuring this stuff out as she says it. “A stranger, you aren’t. You never were and I couldn’t…I didn’t want to become one to you. I didn’t want you to look at me like that.”

“Oh Mildred…”

Mildred doesn’t actually ask her to help. She doesn’t want Gwen to think that’s what it’s all been about. It was supposed to be, but it isn’t. She doesn’t ask. Gwen digs into things herself, digs into this kid who was barely double-digits when he did these things. Made all the headlines at the time, but that was over a decade ago, he’s been locked up ever since. Most of Mildred’s money goes to him, one way or another.

Gwen hides it from Trevor—the murderer, not the sex, he knew about the sex before she ever said anything—for as log as she can. But he’s always been nosy, and now he has a paid excuse to be nosy, and he nearly has an aneurysm when he hears why it is that Gwen���s suddenly digging into this case instead of kissing the babies of gay couples, like she should be.

Gwen cannot do this. Nope, absolute no. She cannot be sneaking around with the younger sister of the kid they’ve made all the documentaries about. Doesn’t matter that she’s running on a platform of prison reform, especially as it pertains to juveniles, this is not the case to start with, especially when she hasn’t won yet.

And Gwen knows. She knows. She argues with Trevor about it until he decides they both need to stop because Gwen has a speaking engagement tomorrow and she can’t sound hoarse. There are many further arguments, arguments about principles over politics, but Gwen knows he’s right. She cannot, should not, be doing any of this, at least not yet. It’s dangerous, it’s selfish, Mildred deserves better than being someone’s secret again. Gwen should break it off, at least until the election. She’s not being fair to either of them like this. They should stop, at least for a few months.

Except it’s Mildred and she’s totally hijacked Gwen’s everything, and the thought of stopping makes her ill, and everything about this is terrifying, the most terrifying thing ever.

And then there’s the checkup and the routine mammogram. Gwen started those earlier than most because somebody’s aunt on somebody’s side of the family got sick, somebody’s cousin on the other side did too.

Scratch that, there’s a new winner for most terrifying thing ever.

It’s good, they say. She started early, they caught it early, this is good, they have treatments for this. Good, they say, while Gwen damn near passes out. She’s got a campaign to finish, she can see the Too Sick to Serve headlines already. A bald look would not test well, she’s sure it wouldn’t. She talks to Trevor about that, about the campaign, until he tells her to shut the fuck up, yanks her into a crushing hug. He cries, damn him, and that makes her cry.

She’s glad he’s there.

She wishes Mildred was.

She is also relieved as hell that Mildred isn’t, that they’re on opposite sides of the state right now. No point having Mildred see her like this, having her worry. She’s got enough to worry about, enough to hurt about.

Not that Gwen isn’t planning to tell her. She is. It’s only been a few whirlwind months, but Gwen knows enough to realize that a lie of omission would be a bad, bad, bad idea where Mildred’s concerned, regardless of intention. Gwen doesn’t think of hiding it anyway, not really. Mildred deserves better then that. When and how to tell the public…that’s a completely different clusterfuck of a situation, but Mildred, Gwen just wants to tell her in person. That way Mildred can see her face when she promises it’s no big deal (hopefully without seeing how terrified she actually is), and Gwen will have all the paperwork and things she knows Mildred will want to see, and they can hold each other, and it’s just, it’s not phone call news.

Except then it’s headline news, because somehow it’s leaked. Fox News is having a field day, certain corners of the Internet are already gleefully writing her obituary, and she’s missed literally hundreds of calls by the time she gets a look at her phone. At least half of those are from Mildred. Mildred who actually sounds hysterical for the first time since Gwen’s known her, that bastard on the news with the hair, he says you’re dying, why aren’t you answering, how long have you known, please, please pick up the phone, just pick up the phone god dammit.

She’s managed to keep Mildred a secret for months. This? This doesn’t last three days before it’s everywhere. Gwen does get an I love you for the first time ever, but seeing as Mildred’s sobbing over her voicemail when it happens, the joy is somewhat muted.

[river-bottom-nightmare]

Here's the headcanon-ficlet-thing I promised! Actually, sorry, it's only HALF of my idea. This thing got MUCH longer than I intended and I've decided it would be easier to just chop this whole thing in two. If I ever send another headcanon, it'll either be much shorter than this or I just won't use anon. Anyways, the death of Dick's parents had just been so SUDDEN and I started thinking, "What if Dick had some separation anxiety when he was younger that just... Never really got resolved? His parents were gone, just like that, and Bruce literally risks his life every day. That couldn't have helped my made up conflict either, I imagine." Hope you enjoy! (1/13)

When Dick first arrived at the manor, he'd just been so GLOOMY. Even after Tony Zucco's arrest, he moped around the living spaces and never seemed happy with how spacious the manor's rooms were. A handful of times, Bruce and Alfred had caught him crying in the emptier wings by himself, but they had never really been sure what to do with the kid other than feel guilty. Sometimes (rarely), Dick would seek one of them out for a hug or SOME form of comfort, but it never seemed to be enough to truly make him feel better. It was no secret that Alfred and Bruce were not the most affectionate people in the world, and Dick had come from a very loving place. It was just another new thing to adjust to in his already new, unfamiliar life. Then Dick wanted to be Robin, full time, and neither Bruce nor Alfred could really say 'no.' Dick still wasn't happy- not for a while- but eventually, his mood started to improve. (2/13)

Maybe that was why no one initially found the boy's habit of waiting by the manor doors alarming. It was one of the places he visited more frequently, and Alfred originally assumed it was because he liked hanging on that specific entrance's chandelier more than the others. However, as the weeks passed, it became obvious that it was just a place Dick liked to hang out when he was waiting for Bruce to return from work or patrol. When it began nearing six thirty, the time Bruce's work hours ended, Dick would set up his homework or drawing paper on the floor and work just to the side of the doors as he waited for them to open. Sometimes he'd even hold a handstand or stretch for however long it took Bruce to come home that day. At first, Alfred didn't know what to make of it. But, watching the way Dick's face lit up every time Bruce knocked at the door, the old butler figured the small habit couldn't do any harm no matter how strange it was. He was just happy the boy wasn't still brooding. (3/13)

Bruce also noticed how Dick always seemed to be waiting for him after work, but ultimately didn't find anything concerning about the observation. Sure, it was a little strange to have such a large reminder that he was an actual guardian now, but he reasoned with himself that Dick would grow out of it after a certain point. He decided to just let the boy be and life carried on. Besides, he wasn't Dick's only person of support; Bruce had caught Dick watching Alfred work in the kitchen on a number of occasions with a concentrated look on his face. Without a doubt, the boy was finally starting to adapt to the manor's way of life. (In all honesty, Bruce had probably been too busy being relieved over the old butler's existence to judge whether or not any of his new ward's behaviors could be considered alarming.) (4/13)

As Dick grew more and more relaxed overtime, neither Bruce nor Alfred put much thought into his other developing habits. For instance, as Robin, Dick always made sure to check in with a quick "Are you still there, Batman?" over the comms everytime the line went quiet for more than ten minutes. Bruce would occasionally warn him not to call in when they were on stealth missions, but Dick never quite seemed comfortable with leaving the line COMPLETELY dead whenever they left each other's sight. On those missions, he'd sometimes blow softly into his comm unit, and Bruce would have to make some subtle noise back so as not to completely worry the kid. Dick even seemed to develop certain behaviors around charity events and galas; for example, he would always hug Bruce's pant leg at the beginning of the events and would only let go once he was made to socialize. Despite the fact that it soon became apparent the kid was far from shy, the habit always took place without fail, to Bruce's perplexed amusement. Maybe the kid just hated Gotham's elites? (5/13)

More and more little habits flew under the radar as everyone still seemed to be adjusting to the new lifestyle. Occasionally Bruce and Alfred would pick up on something seeming a little off, but at the same time, Dick finally looked happy. Really, a few weird displays of affection here and there were FAR from their concern so long as Dick's days of endless distraught were over. And so, once Dick finally- and TRULY- settled into the manor as his new home, a bunch of odd behaviors just seemed to be swept under the carpet and ignored. On the unavoidable nights where Bruce got injured in the field, there was no missing how the habits seemed to rise in intensity, but by then... They became the everyday normal and were never addressed. (6/13)

(The Justice League found Robin's behavior more bemusing than anything. Dick was still in the habit of obsessively checking the comms when Batman, on a rare occasion, asked for backup. "Check in, Batman?" "Still scaling the perimeter. We might not catch any activity tonight past a few petty thefts." "Alrighty. And, uh, Superman! Status update!" "Nothing going on up here either, Robin." "Okay!" Ten minutes passed and the boy's voice crackled back to life on the comms once more. "Is everyone still okay?" After that one particular patrol, Clark had sent Bruce a questioning look. "He's nine. Of course he's worried." Clark didn't push it- or anyone else for that matter.) (7/13)

It wasn't until Dick turned sixteen and started looking to be more independent that his behavior finally set off a few alarm bells. His check-ins had turned more snippy over the years when Bruce and him got into fights, but they never really stopped. The arms clinging to Bruce's pant legs at galas were instead replaced by a friendly hand on Bruce's shoulder, yet Dick's presence had never really left his side- only growing more flighty and uncertain as he got older. When Dick did his homework, by then in his last year or two of highschool, it was no longer on the floor but instead in the dining room closest to the manor's entrance- still started at around five or six just like when Dick first arrived at the manor, and still fit to Bruce's work schedule. It occurred to Alfred that a few of Dick's behaviorisms probably should have been checked out a while ago. (8/13)

"When you were Master Richard's age, you were barely home. It's normal for teenagers to want a bit of distance and alone time, but Master Bruce, he only stays after school for club activities. The rest of his time is either spent partoling around the city or helping YOU. I'm worried whether or not his behavior is healthy." Bruce had contimplated these words before giving his own thoughts. At the time, he and Dick's working relationship as Batman and Robin was becoming a bit more strained, but he still KNEW Dick. "I'm not sure, Alfred. He says he's happy with the friends he has, and he's always been relatively well behaved... Could it be that this is just routine for him?" Alfred disagreed and so the discussion continued. However, any plans they made to adress the situation were cut short when Dick got shot in the shoulder. (9/13)

Bruce tried not to feel guilty about firing Dick and then kicking him out of the manor. A little space would be good for the boy, right? For as long he could remember, Dick had always been just around the corner. It was safer this way. He ignored Alfred's angry, dissapointed gaze and Clark's furious demands to explain what the hell he'd been thinking. Batman didn't need a Robin, and Dick would be fine without Bruce. (Bruce would be fine without Dick.) Later, on patrol, there was a second where the comm crackled to life. Before anything could happen it got shut off again, and before Bruce knew it, Dick's check-ins were gone. Batman didn't need Robin. (10/13)

There was no missing Dick's sudden change. With the Titans, Dick's mother henning got turned up to an eleven. Dick was always somewhere in the tower helping someone, and no one could miss the way he was practicaly always asking if anyone needed anything. Missions and patrols ran mostly the same, but it was much more often that Dick could be found staying up late at night, going through evidence on cases he was working on. His friends did their best to be understanding, but there was no hiding the fact that Dick needed help. Real help. They urged him to talk about what was wrong, but even Dick seemed to be at a loss for what he was going through. "I mean, I got kicked out! What else is there to say?" He yelled one day. Roy tried to reason with him. "But there's MORE to it than-" "There isn't." "Dick, you've been acting off for months." "And I'll be FINE in a few more! I'm always fine. Stop worrying." (11/13)

Eventually, they did. After a few more missions, it was as if nothing ever happened. Dick worked as he normally would and he started running off to do his own things rather than hover around other people's projects. He still gave off a sense of brokeness but by then there wasn't much that anyone could do. There had been one week in particular, though, that things just seemed to... Shift. Dick had just discovered that Bruce adopted another kid in the newspapers and there were sightings of another Robin. For a second, he seemed furious, and they all remembered feeling VERY concerned for what the guy might do. For four days straight it was if he was too angry to talk. On the fifth day, Dick disappeared. He wasn't seen again until the next morning. "Dick, are you alright?" Something visibly settled in him and just like that, Dick was fine again. Still overbearing, but fine. (12/13)

Okay! That's all I have so far since I don't want to spam your inbox with any more text blocks for one idea. You probably noticed that this first part just goes over more HOW Dick behaved when he was younger. The second part to this will focus more on everyone realizing that Dick had some repressed trauma going on, and the consequences it's had on him for never adressing said trauma. (Also Bruce, you shouldn't have kicked your teenage son out of the house. That didn't help.) Some of Dick's coping mechanisms when it comes to dealing with Bruce will probably also be questioned, but with the time away from Bruce, don't worry- Dick will be more obviously independent. He knew he wasn't in the best place. I'll send you the second part whenever I get done with it, which shouldn't take too long. Thanks for being excited to read my head canon and ideas! (13/13)

hey babe. this is,,,,,,oh my god. i love it so much. well actually i hated it because it was full of angst and it made me feel emotions and AGH. but also i loved it and god i can’t wait for the next part. you have NO IDEA how much i need the next part.

also, can i just say? the fic portion itself (2-12) is 1.7k words long. with a little editing, this could be a full fledged fic you can post on ao3. you absolutely don’t have to do it if you don’t want to, that’s just an idea i’m throwing out there.

dick with separation anxiety sounds so so plausible, because that abrupt shift from living in a circus to wayne manor of all places must have been QUITE the shift. i really loved how you touched on all these different habits and quirks dick had growing up, and how those bled over into different relationships in his life. and i can’t wait to see how you resolve it.

and i have one more thing for you. this isn’t really the same idea but it’s got somewhat similar elements: i read a fic a while back about dick being touch starved. it seemed up your alley, and anyone else who liked reading this incredible drabble, i think you’ll enjoy reading it! touch starved by envysparkler.

[kileyrose-2003]

Rose the Hat x Fem! Reader

Hello lovelies! This imagine was requested by @merci-bitch I still love that username, lol. I hope you enjoy! Sorry it took me a while to publish. I was getting stuff ready for Christmas all day today.

Warnings: Violence, implied child abuse, implied domestic violence, mentions of child death, mentions of sexism.

For someone with such a beautiful face, you did not have such a beautiful past. You were a freak. Or at least that's what you thought.

You were born into a wealthy family and your parents wanted a little boy, not a girl. They were automatically biased about you from the start.

You were a beautiful baby and so happy. You loved everyone, even strangers. Your aunts and uncles would hold you close when they came to visit telling your parents how lucky they were or how special you were. You were an only child after all. They would just shrug. "It's a child. Nothing that special about her."

Over time though they realized just how special you were. You weren't like other children. You seen things and did things other children didn't do.

You could advise someone to go to the doctor because somehow you knew they were sick and could tell people little tidbits about their past or future.

Guest and other relatives marvelled over it, remarking on how cool they thought it was. Your parents didn't like it though. In their small minds, little girls weren't supposed to do things like that.

You did everything they asked but it was never good enough. You got good grade, got accepted into Honor Society, virtually any achievement anyone could think of. Your parents didn't care though.

Years of rejection hurt and once you hit your early teens you began to react like any normal teenager would. You cried everyday when you came over the smallest things and crying eventually turned to rebelling.

You'd go out for nights on end and not come. Your shine grew stronger and your parents could take you no more.

They sent you away to an inpatient mental health facility. You begged and begged not to go. You weren't crazy. You didn't ask to have this weird sonar in your head. You wanted to be normal. They refused though stating "You were to dangerous to others and yourself."

Those two years you spent locked away were the hardest years you ever knew. You were constantly doped out on all the medications they gave you and your shine became slightly surpressed.

Even though supression occurred though, dark things became attached to you. Demons and ghost would come to you in the night and you could take no more.

On a dark, summer night you took the first pair of clothes and purse you could find and ran off. You felt relieved but couldn't help but feeling distressed.

You had money and enough debit cards to get you anywhere you wanted at this point but eventually someone would notice their purse was missing and money was gone.

As soon as you got out of the bus, you turned to escorting wealthy men for money. The pay was good but some of the men were terrible.

More often than not, you'd wake up in an unfamiliar hotel room and no memory of how you got there. Days of the week blended in together and one drink eventually turned to the whole bottle. It was one of the very rare days you didn't have and you were currently at your favorite movie theater, nestled into your seat zoning off to the music in the vintage film. Your thirst for liquor was off that day and you just felt like doing something different.

The theater was mostly empty besides a few people and a couple sitting in the way back together.

"I don't see what you're fussing about." Rose mused, laying her head on Crow Daddy's shoulder. She wasn't enthused by any of this. Normally she'd enjoy a night out at the cinema with her Crow but the popcorn was bland and the teenagers sloppily kissing on the big screen were not the best entertainment.

"She's steamy. Just look at her." Crow gestured his hand towards you. "I'll agree, big steam but she has no particular talent. She's just steamy."

"You don't think she'd be good to turn?" Rose held a piece of popcorn up to his lips. "If the situation was different, then yes. For right now though, no. We need to eat more than we need steam. How old do you think she is anyways?"

Crow pushed her hand away. "Nineteen or twenty tops. If we train her though, she'd have so much talent. Plus she's kinda cute." Rose furrowed her brows. "What the fuck did you just say?"

"You heard." He shrugged, desperately trying to get a rise out of her. Rose glared at him out of the corners of her eyes, a slight pang of jealousy ran through her. "Spunky tonight, aren't we?"

"Guess you could call it that." Rose grinned tightly. "Not feeling the hunger yet from a few months ago?"

"Nope." He popped his 'p'

'Of course you're not. Because you want to be stubborn.' Rose shifted in her seat.

"We're not turning her. We just turned Andi a few months ago. You know how it is. You don't turn more than one in a short period of time. You don't want to make the baby jealous."

"If I may say so Rosie, Andi doesn't seem like she has a care in the slightest about anything." Crow's tone remained soft but he retained serious composure in his face.

Rose smiled sickly sweet. "I didn't ask for your opinion but that's fine, honeybunch." She leaned upwards, trailing kisses all over his collar bone. "You remember the last time we ate?"

"Six months ago..Rhode Island." He grunted, trying his hardest not to give in. "Remember how nice it felt? How good the sex was?" She nipped the sensitive part of his neck. "We can have that again very soon if we have her."

Crow's eyes rolled into the back, running his hands up and down her sides. "Do you have a plan on how you want to trap her?"

"We don't have to do anything. Matter of fact, I think we have the perfect opportunity..now." Your phone began to ring in your pocket and you walked up the aisle to step outside and answer it.

Crow took Rose's soft hand is his rough, lightly scarred one. A reminiscent of the physically grueling years of his youth. "Let's do this then."

Meanwhile you stood outside in the rain, your phone pressed up against your ear. "No..I'm not leaving. Because, it's my day off..and I said no! Look, I'm at a movie theater, I'll call you back. Bye."

You hung up the phone and shook your head, walking to your car but something felt off. You felt like someone was watching you. "Excuse me, Miss." Hesitantly, you turned around. Trusting the bright and cheerful smile despite that uneasy feeling in your stomach. "You left your purse in theater." He held up what you thought was your hand bag.

"Oh my gosh. Thank you so much." You approached Crow. "I was wondering where I put it." You went to take the bag in your hand but it was no longer there.

"What the fuck?" A hand grabbed your arm and you tensed. You spun in the opposite direction and was greeted by Rose.

"Well hi there, dollface." You paused and turned your gaze to the woman across from you. Her grey eyes hypnotized you as they locked with Y/c/e orbs. She was the most beautiful woman you'd ever seen, on the outside at least. Something wasn't right on the inside though. You didn't have to use your shine to know that. You had to get away from her.

"You want to let me go." The older woman looked amused and let out a hardy laugh. "Oh no, dearest..no, I don't."

"Yes, you do." Rose insisted. You struggled against her as you felt a set of arms wrap around your torso. "Stop it." You squirmed.

"It's alright honey. Just relax. It'll only be a little pinch." You shook your head and Rose held your shoulders tightly. "You are a special little thing, aren't you?"

Her eyes flicked blue and you gasped as the needle punctured your skin. It stung like a bee and you flinched. The further Crow pushed down on the needle the colder and limper you began to feel.

"How much more?" Rose eyed you closely. "Maybe a milliliter more." She smiled at you and gently caressed your cheeks. "You're going to meet some fun people, sweetcheeks. For right now though, I want you to sleep."

"I-" She shushed you. "Sleep." Your lids felt heavy and soon after your neck muscles gave out and head bobbed forward as you fell asleep.

"Well that was easier than I thought." Crow threw you over his shoulder. "How many cannisters do you think we can fill with this one?"

"I don't know..at least three." Rose slipped her fingers under your chin. "You're right, she is a pretty thing. Too bad she doesn't have any particular skill. She seems like she'd be fun to have around."

"You think?" He gestured to the bottle of liquor that fell out of your purse. Rose chuckled and picked it up of the ground. "Eighty proof. My she must be a busy girl."

The roar of an engine came up from behind both members and they turned on both heels as Snakebite Andi opened the door to the RV. "That the Steamhead?" Rose nodded and Crow carried you inside. "Where to?" Barry yelled from the driver seat. "That forest we passed on the way here. Nobody should hear her out there."

A few hours later you kicked and screamed as Rose carried you out of the RV. "No! No! No!" You begged and flopped against her. "Please..please! I won't tell! I swear."

"Honey, it's not personal and I know you wouldn't but it's just not a practical option." She dropped you on the ground roughly and the other's began to tie you up.

Crow was standing off to the side with a map in his hands. "Rosie, I thought you said no one would hear us out here."

"They won't. Why?" Rose began to sharpen her knife. "We're near a campground." She furrowed her brows. "No, we're not."

"Yes, we are." He held two of his fingers up and gestured for her to come near him. Rose snatched the map into her hands and looked down at you.

"Well I'll be damned." Crow nodded. "Yeah, not a good thing."

Meanwhile Andi hammered one of the stakes down by your feet. "It's a shame, really. You're a pretty girl and I was there once in your shoes but a girl's got to eat."

Tears started streaming down your cheek and Rose stood infront of you. She didn't care who heard something. They needed to eat.

"Rose, will you make her shut up?" Barry groaned. Rose grinned and kneeled infront of you, running the knife against cheek. "Shh..pain purifies steam. Fear too so now you understand."

She raised the knife above her head, balance it inbetween the tips of her fingers. "Are you going to hurt me?" Your inside burns and you felt like you wanted to throw up.

"Yes." Her arm moved forward to stab you but a light peeked through the bushes. "Hey, what's going on over here?"

A rush of adrenaline radiated through you and you swung your legs forward. Kicking Crow in the face. He groaned, holding his bleeding face. "Little whore!"

"They're trying to kill me!" You screamed as you ran up the hill. You expected some of them to run after you but most fled to their RV.

Meanwhile Rose shoved a cloth she had woven into her hair in Crow's direction. "Rosie, where are you going?"

"I'm going to find that pretty, little bitch." Rose ran after you, trying to find any sight of you. "Y/n?" She called out. "That is your name, isn't it? I'm Rose, in case you didn't know mine."

A twig cracked and she spun in the opposite direction. "You can't hide forever, sweetface. That's what you've been doing your whole life, haven't you? If you don't hide from me, I can show you just how special we are. Because like I said you are a special girl."

You cautiously peeked out from behind the tree you were hiding by and made your way to speak past Rose.

"I hear you moving, my sweet. Come to Old Rose." You near passed her when your forehead bumped straight into her's. That battered old top hat fell off her head.

"You asshole!" Rose got your hair in her grip and gave it a rough yank. You screamed and attempted to push her back. "Get away from me, you crazy whore."

You earned another tug to your locks for that remark. "Knock my hat over, hide from me, and be rude? Oh honey, you and I are going to have fun."

Rose pressed your body against the ground and you helplessly found yourself gripping at the ground as if it was going to help you.

There was predatorial prowess in Rose's gaze that made you feel nervous. In the distance you could hear police sirens. "I think I seen them this way."

Rose's head quickly bobbed up as if she was trying to figure out if it was a member of her family and she cursed. "I want to remember every single feature on your face that way you'll never be able to escape."

You let out a scream and she rolled her eyes. "Oh will you shut up?" Rose's lips smashed against yours, biting at your lip for entrance to your mouth. You stared at her in awe for a few minutes before letting her tongue enter your mouth. It felt so wrong but so right at the same time.

This woman tried to kill you. You shouldn't be making out with her but her dominace and aggressive beauty took you in an instant and you had to admit, she was a damn good kisser too.

Your tongues fought for a winner for a few more moments before she pulled away from you. Your lipstick was smearing on Rose's lip and she grinned.

Her rough touch turned gentle as she booped your nose. "You're lucky. Your screams saved you this time but rest assure my sweet, I will be seeing you again and like I said, you'll never escape."

"Until we meet again, pretry girl." Rose stood up off the ground and nodded in your direction before walking off. You laid on the ground, gazing up at the stars. In shock of it all. "What the fuck just happened?"

You heard rustling from the bushes behind and the police ran up to you. "Miss, are you okay?" You nodded slowly. "Yeah I'm..I'm fine."

"Can you tell us what happened?" You could see The True's RVs rolling out in the distance and you shrugged. "I-i don't know."

One of them mumbled something about amnesia and helped you off the ground. "Let's get you to the hospital."

Down the road Rose drove at a normal pace as she made her way from the scene. "How come you're not panicking?" He had a piece of gauze pressed up against his cheek.

"She didn't tell," Rose responded, keeping her eyes on the road. "So we're just going to let her go?" She chuckled and shook her head. "No..I have a different plan for this one. I thought about what you said before Crow and I think you're right." He raised an eyebrow at Rose and she smirked.

Less than a week later you were back at home when there was a knock on your apartment door during your movie night and you put the bowl of popcorn down to go answer it. You looked out the peephole before opening it.

Rose stood on the other side, clad in a pretty silk shirt and broad grin on her face. "Well, hi there. I told you I'd be seeing you again."

There waa no weapon on Rose and you stared at her in complete confusion, not knowing whether to return the greeting or push her out. Rose giggled at you and strolled past you, shuttling the door behind her. "Ooo what are we watching? Casablanca? Good choice for a rube."

"W-what are you doing here?" Rose chuckled. "I told you we weren't finished yet." She pecked your lips. "I still have to make you scream."

She playfully smacked your ass. "Where's your bedroom?" You pointed down the hall and Rose took your hand in hers, taking you to your bed.

Rose pressed her lips against yours and forced you down onto the bed. "I don't think we really had a proper introduction."

"You think?" The words came out snappily but you didn't mind. "What exactly are you because I know you're not human."

"An empty devil." The response came out coldly and chills ran down your spine. Rose laughed and kissed your cheeks.

"Not so fiesty now, are we?" She ran her hands down your side as she looker around your apartment. "Haven't lived here long, have you? Or had a family in a while."

"What's it to you?" You spat and Rose smiled. "What would you say if I changed that?" You raised an eyebrow.

"Here's the deal..I'm going to make you an offer Y/n because it's clear you're the hunt or be hunted type and you're steamy." She eyed you up and down. "How old are you, lovely?"

"Twenty" You hummed softly and Rose grinned. "What an age. You know I remember being your age once. Long time ago. I felt lonesome and turned to love in all the wrong places then I met someone like myself who showed me I wasn't alone. Wasn't crazy. That's how you felt for a long time, didn't you? Your family didn't understand you. No one did."

"I-i..I don't want to talk about it." You overted eye contact. "Shhh.. it's okay. We all have our deep and dark little secrets in our families. That's what I'm offering you. No secrets you have to hold anymore and no more hunting for a meal. Stay young, eat well, live long. What do you say?"

"I say I got nothing to lose." You shrugged. "Excellent." You attempted to stand up to grab your belongings but Rose pushed you back down. "Oh no, no, no..not yet. I told you. I'm not through with you yet."

Instead of your screams of pain it was screams of pleasure Rose heard all night and Rose was perfectly fine with that. Either way she had you trapped and she wasn't letting you go, ever.

[willow-salix]

Random bit of fun that popped into my head. Grandma Tracy + Selene + cooking sherry =

Selene checked the recipe again and nodded to Grandma. It couldn't be that hard could it, to be all domesticated and shit? She had many manly men that she had to cook for, not that she went in for all the "a woman's place is in the kitchen" stereotypes,  but she did think it was important that they came home to something better than their Grandmother's cooking attempts after a tough rescue, and this one looked like it would be a nightmare mission. 

She could cook most things, basic and homely she called it, having learnt baking from her Nan, although she did like to challenge herself now and then.

She had decided in her infinite wisdom that if she was capable of making simple dishes like lasagna, chilli's, soups, burgers, pizza's pancakes, breakfasts and the like, coupled with the fact that she was actually good at baking, she could manage to help Grandma in her mission. It shouldn't be that hard to make their boys some lovely fresh donuts, something they all loved.  Yep, that was a plan! 

Grandma Tracy had wandered back and forth while Selene was assembling the ingredients, flour, salt, yeast, eggs, milk and melted butter and insisted on helping, trying to add her own selections to the mix which Selene gently vetoed, hiding them in the microwave. It would be fine, with her overseeing the proceedings Grandma couldn't get into too much trouble, could she? 

Selene directed Grandma as they slowly added the wet ingredients into a big mixing bowl, one at a time until they made a relatively smooth mixture, then Grandma added that little by little to the flour, Selene mixing with her hands until they had a rough dough. 

She dribbled some oil onto the worktop, dumped out the bowl and began to knead the slop, gradually feeling it grow thicker and less gloopy, more springy. Damn this was hard work!

"Let me have a try, you youngsters don't know the meaning of hard work."

Selene stepped aside to let Grandma T take her turn, but within a minute the older lady was huffing as bad as Selene was. 

They tag teamed back and forth for a few minutes but her fingers were cramping and she was sure that she had inhaled so much flour she'd be sneezing bread rolls.  She went to wipe her forehead but her hands were so greasy with the oil she gave in. She didn't want to resort to cheating, but needs must. 

She whispered a little chant under her breath when Grandma made her excuses to go to the bathroom and watched as the dough kneaded itself, plumping up and down and flipping itself over as she washed her hands and settled down with a can of cherry coke. The dough flopped itself back into its bowl after a few more minutes and she covered it over and placed it on the windowsill to rise for an hour.  

And she promptly forgot about it, wandering off with Grandma to catch up on "The bold and the beautiful" a TV show that Grandma watched religiously and that had become Selene's guilty pleasure whenever she was on the island. 

Upon returning to the kitchen after learning that Chico was Marion's secret son and that Charlie's amnesia was fake, they found the bowl overflowing and the dough creeping its way towards the floor.

"Stupid magic kneading!" Selene dived at the dough, nudging Armstrong out for the way just as he tried to bat at it with his paw. "No! Bad cat. Leave it!" 

She cradled it in her arms like it was a baby, a big, messy, yeasty baby that was determined to get the fuck out of dodge. She balanced on one leg as she tried to hold it up with her knee, kneeing it like she was playing keepy uppy with a football. 

"Grandma, get a bowl! A big one!" She gave it a big push upwards as Grandma shoved a huge bowl under it, catching the evil, still growing blob. 

"What's wrong with it?" Grandma asked as she poked at it with her finger, diving back when it looked like it would consume her whole hand. 

"Nothings wrong with it, I'm sure it'll be fine."

Against her better judgement, and Selene wasn't known to be entirely sane at the best of times, she grabbed the biggest saucepan they had and filled it with oil, setting it on the stove to boil. Should only take a few minutes....  

She watched as the oil began to bubble and smoke,  knowing it was about as hot as it would get. Witches didn't like boiling oil, call her silly but that had always been something to avoid in the olden days, which was probably why she had taken the few minutes to kit herself out in a huge apron, Scott's spare bike helmet and a pair of Virgil's thick work gloves. Couldn't be too careful. 

She dug her hands into the dough, hitting it with her elbow when it looked like it might try to be the one to eat her before they cooked it. "No! Down! Bad dough!" 

She was sure it would be fine once it was cooked,  witches made everything a bit more lively, the boys could attest to that.

"Watch out Grandma, don't get too close." 

She scooped out a handful and rolled it into a ball then holding it at arm's length, dropped it in the oil like it was a hand grenade. Boom, the oil jumped up to meet her and she stepped back with a squeak of shock. Not good. Nope nope so much nope. Not doing that again. 

"Oh don't worry, it always does that when I cook too," Grandma shrugged as she crossed to the fridge to get herself a drink. "Keep going, it'll be fine."

After rolling another ball, which she caught before it rolled off the counter and across the floor yelling  'cry freedom', she sourced a pair of BBQ tongs to hold it with and dropped it carefully in the oil. 

"That seemed to work," Grandma encouraged. "Keep doing that."

Ball after ball followed and her roll, grab and drop operation was going so well she completely forgot that the oil was actually cooking the damn things. 

"Uh…little too brown maybe…" she fished them out and dumped them into a bowl lined with kitchen towel. She poked them, were they OK? 

"They'll be fine with some powdered sugar on them," Grandma proclaimed wisely, although Selene wasn't too sure. "Do the rest, that's nowhere near enough to feed my boys."

Grandma supervised as Selene slowly worked her way through the dough mass, which seemed to have lost its determination now she had effectively scooped half of it away, though it was still making a strange wheezing noise as it attempted to grow some more. She'd soon put a stop to that! She quickly rolled and tossed more balls into the oil, having perfected her drop and duck technique.  Paranoid that she'd burn the next lot she got them out earlier...Perhaps a little too early, as they stuck to her tongs as she slapped them into the bowl. 

"Damn it."

"Jelly will fix them, " Grandma nodded sagely, "Jelly fixes everything."

Selene threw the last of the balls, now looking slightly less ball like and more like lumps of dough that she was too fucked off with to fix, and began to search the cupboards for something to insert the jam inside the balls. 

She located a turkey baster that Parker had insisted they needed to cook a decent Christmas dinner, and that Alan had secretly been using to squirt the Gordon with. Selene had filled it with whisky that one time and used it to fire at Scott from opposite ends of the couch in an attempt to reach each others mouths. She grinned at the memory.

As if reading her mind- maybe she was a witch too- Grandma vanished and reappeared with half a bottle of cooking sherry. 

"Would you like a little taste? I find it helps me relax sometimes when I'm cooking, you're too tense."

Well, that might explain a few of Grandma's more adventurous dishes. 

Selene looked at the bottle, she could actually do with a little of that right now. She held out her coke can and Grandma poured a healthy splash into the remains of her coke.

"Don't tell John," Selene warned as she gulped down some of the drink for strength as she faced the fried dough balls she was supposed to fix. 

She grabbed a pot of smooth jam out of the cupboard and sucked some up into the baster -not that easy to do it turned out- and holding one of the cooked balls she stabbed it with the end of the rubber syringe. It went right through.  

"Shit!" 

She tried again, splitting another one. 

"Fuck!" 

"Language, Selene!" 

"Sorry, Grandma."

"Let me try," Sally managed to get the tip in one and squirted a generous amount into the donut. But didn't count on the force of her squeezing making the donut shoot off the end and fly across the room to smack Armie in the eye.

"Fuck!" 

"Grandma!" Selene was shocked, but had the terrible urge to giggle. 

Sorry," Grandma apologised, both to Selene and the cat, trying again.

                                    ***

The bowl was a jammy,  powdered sugar covered, slightly oily mess and Selene was on her third can of sherry and coke and honestly, she no longer really gave a shit. 

Who's stupid idea had this been? It was the thought that counted right? 

Grandma had given up over an hour ago and gone to bed, knowing the boys would be heading home soon and Selene desperately needed a shower. She had jam in her hair, sugar sticking to her hands and she'd lost the will to live. 

She plonked the bowl in the middle of the kitchen counter. 

"Sexy spaceman of mine," she texted, "sorry they look like shit…yeah, can't really explain what happened there…but I'll be naked in bed if that helps." She snapped a picture to go with it and called it good, promising to clean up in the morning. 

And she wound her way on slightly unsteady feet,  up the stairs and into the bathroom to shower off the remains of her one and only attempt to cook something you could buy easier,  promising herself a trip to Krispy Kreme in the very near future, and flopped on the bed wrapped in nothing but a towel. 

                                       ***

"John?" Gordon stared at the text that had popped up on all their comms less than 30 seconds ago. 

"I don't even know."

Their brother's long suffering, defeated tone just made the whole thing even funnier. 

"Think you had better get down here, bro," Virgil chuckled. "We'll be home in five."

"Yeah, that's probably wise," Scott added. 

Even EOS seemed to find the whole situation amusing, which in itself was a little bit worrying, as John rode the elevator down to the island. 

Alan and Gordon were staring at the bowl as if it might explode any minute. John spotted the empty sherry bottle in the sink and sighed. 

"Grandma got the sherry out." 

"That's not good," Scott agreed as he too entered the war zone, formerly known as the kitchen, his eyes taking in the precariously piled bowls, the flour that coated every surface, the oil patch that Alan almost slipped in and the grease splattered stove top, the pan of oil sitting abandoned. His bike helmet was on one of the stools and one of Virgil's gloves peeked out from the bottom bowl of the stack, though it was so covered in dough you could barely tell what it was. 

Virgil brought up the rear, his nose wrinkling at the slightly smokey, oily smell that hung in the air. 

"Dare you to eat one," Gordon nudged Alan. 

"Hell no! John should, it's his girlfriend that made them."

"Fiancée," John automatically corrected, poking gingerly at the contents of the bowl. "And no, I don't think so."

"Scott, you're the brave one, you like to take a risk now and then, you do it."

"Like the rescue wasn't risky enough? No way. Virg, you try, it's like modern art, appreciate it."

"Nope, I like my taste buds where they are, Gordo, you do it, it was your idea."

Gordon paled as he looked into the bowl. "All of us?" he asked hopefully. 

The boys exchanged glances and then one by one they all reached into the bowl, their competitive streak unable to resist, selecting the least offensive looking offerings. 

"On three?" Scott confirmed. "One…two…three!"

As one they all tossed their donuts into their mouths, chewing madly, their faces contorting into identical grimaces of horror and disgust. 

Alan raced to the trash can, opening his mouth to let the offending evil drop out of his mouth. 

"Urghh, it was raw inside," he shuddered. 

Gordon followed suit, spitting his out. "Mines burnt."

Virgil managed to swallow his. "Mine was all sugar which pretty much hid everything."

Scott had a dribble of jelly running down his chin to drip onto his uniform, his mouth hanging open as if he didn't dare close it again. Virgil handed him a paper towel and he grateful spat out the offensive food.

"My God, that was foul."

They all looked at John, who was still chewing his dough ball, now matter how much he worked it, it never got any smaller. In the end he too gave up and spat it into the trash. "It was like trying to eat a rubber ball."

Virgil tossed the remains into the trash to spare Kayo and Brains the same horror. "At least they tried."

Too tired to actually be bothered with real food, Scott handed round some bowls and Virgil grabbed a box of cereal and some milk.

They all ate quickly, eating in companionable silence, standing up, leaning against various cupboards and furniture, knowing if they sat down they would likely never get up again.

"Damn!" John moved suddenly, breaking the silence of the room, dumping his half eaten cereal in the sink.

"What's wrong?" Scott frowned, instantly worried.

"I just remembered the rest of her message," he was already running towards the stairs, "I've got a naked woman waiting for me."

Alan shuddered, gagging on his mouthful of cereal. "I did not need to know that."

[rainyrowan]

Sunkissed - Chapter 3

description: Wedding of the century rolls around as the previous college clique, along with the rest of their family members, stay in preparation for it. During this time, Riley meets Lucas, a gorgeous, green-eyed wallflower who happens to be immediately taken by her. Little did she know, he has a deep secret. One that will either change her views on him forever or make her feel closer to his world.

word count: 2,927

pairing: riley x lucas

Song: Stop and Stare by OneRepublic

chapter three; riley

For most girls, coming home to your mother posing by the stairwell in a wedding dress as your father and her best friend are adjusting the fabric beneath her isn't typically, well, normal. However, it's the norm on my end. 

"Hi honey," Topanga greets as I come into the front door. "What do you think of the dress?" She asks, dramatically leaning against the banister, allowing her ombre curls to cascade over her face. The dress is pretty simple compared to all the other ones that she has tried on for her previous clients. This dress is made up of white satin and it's off the shoulder too. It also has little laced flowers at the bottom, which I thought was pretty cute. I genuinely think it's beautiful, but I'm still shaken up that I just nod silently.

A satisfied smile creeps upon her face. "Good. Well, it's Rachel's."

"Oh, she's here?"

"She's at my place, Babygirl," Angela speaks. "Her, Aubrey, and Lucas should be settling in."

"Who's Aubrey and Lucas?" I ask.

"Aubrey's her niece and Lucas is the nephew." Topanga answers.

Dad jerks up and points a finger at me. "You are to stay away from Lucas, ya hear me?!"

Angela rolls her eyes. "Cut it out, Cor. Your father is joking. You should meet them." She then turns to my dad. "Both of them."

"Sure. I really don't mind. I'll meet them when I get the chance." I shrug. "But for now, I'll head up to my room."

They all nod at me before I quickly start climbing up the flight of stairs. Our house only has three rooms, which makes two reserved for my parents and my not-so-little brother, Auggie. The last room would be the office that my parents have always wanted. This leaves me the attic. Although, I'm really not complaining or anything. As a matter of fact, with the help of Farkle, I was able to decorate my relatively large area just the way I want it. Only cons would be that I have to climb an extra flight of stairs and I don't have a door. My room's basically a loft, but I love it.

Just as I was about to head into my room, I decided to make a slight detour to Auggie's. I poke my head into the slightly closed door to find him locking lips with his girlfriend of apparently seven years, Ava. I roll my eyes at the sight. Just as I was about to shut the door, giving them privacy, he pulls away from her and turns to me. "You perv." He sneers.

"Hi, Riley," Ava says, embarrassed.

I smile at her. "Hey."

"Can you just leave us be?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. Oh, whatever happened to my sweet little boy? He's all grown up now.

"My dear brother, if you would like some privacy, I think you should really use this to your advantage." I sway the door back and forth.

"Whatever." He offers me a smirk.

"Just keep this shut and don't do anything you'll regret!" I exclaim, walking away.

Once I've reached my room, I plop onto my bed. I lied there for a few moments, just pondering about everything that has happened today. I've embarrassed myself once again and now Charlie's mad at me. I groan and the thought. I sit up, glancing at my phone beside me. I impulsively click on Farkle's contact and shoot him a text. 

Hey, where are you right now?

Lucky for me, Farkle's pretty quick when it comes to responding to my messages.

Sparkly Farkly: I'm home. Why?

Are you busy? Can you come over? I kind of need you.

Sparkly Farkly: Give me 2 minutes. I'll be there.

I graciously sighed in relief. Having your best friend be your next door neighbor can be more convenient than you think. I look up at my mirror, which sits on top of my dresser. I sigh as I stare at my reflection. Ugh. I pretty much sigh every time I see myself in the mirror. Look at the mirror-- sigh. Look at the mirror-- sigh. It has become an impressive reflex throughout the years, honestly. Today, I sigh at my brown curls. How can Charlie still look adoringly handsome when the sea breeze messes up his hair? And when that happens to me, why do I look like I've just rolled out of bed? I pick up my brush and comb through my curls. Moments later, I hear a soft knock on my door. "Come in," I say. 

Farkle opens the door and I smile at him. Well, I smile at him to the point where tears start to slightly form in my eyes. "Not again," He whispers before pulling me into his arms. I sob uncontrollably into his shirt, which I used to feel really bad doing, especially since I wear mascara on a day to day basis. Even on my worst days, but it's not like I know when I'm going to have one anyways. Today, I fortunately do not have any makeup on.

"What happened?" He asks me. 

I pull away, wiping my tears. "I had a panic attack, Farkle."

He tenses up. "Is it because of Charlie? What did he do?" 

I sob as I explain what had happened, hoping that he could even understand what I was even saying. Moments like these, I feel like I tend to overreact on the littlest of things. Farkle says it's fine and that I should just let everything out, instead of bottling anything in, regardless if it's anything major or not. He's truly a good friend for willing to hear me out and staying patient with me. 

"I just don't understand why I fall into these things. I understand what I'm getting myself into, but it's like I just ignore the consequences." I rant, finally cooling down.

"It's okay, Riley. It happens," He responds. "You just need to remember that there are certain things that are out of your control and you can't dwell on that."

"Have you met me, though?" We both laugh. It's true. I seem to always be filled with so much regret. 

"The best thing that you can do is move on. As a matter of fact, we can do that right now!" Farkle retrieves his backpack that I hardly even noticed he brought. "Movie night?"

I let out a sigh and smile at him. Move on. I think to myself. "Depends... What movie?"

"I was thinking Funny Face." He suggests.

"Of course! How can I say no to an Audrey Hepburn film?" I exclaim. "I'll get the ice cream." 

Moments later, we're snuggled up in my blanket on the floor. Farkle's laptop is placed right in front of us as we watch the movie and simultaneously stuff our faces with chocolate ice cream. This pretty much sums up my ideal perfect night. 

Funny Face clearly is one of my favorite movies of all time. We beam over how dreamy Paris is, how Audrey's costumes look breathtaking in the film, and Farkle and I even got to dance along to the musical sequences that would come up. It was all laughter and fun for a bit, but as the night came along, it all had to be put to an end. Once the movie ended, Farkle gets a call from his mom telling him that it was time to go home. 

"I gotta go." He mumbles. 

I frowned. "Aw, can't stay longer?"

"I wish I could," Farkle hangs his head down. "I'd rather be here than at home anyways." I pull him into an embrace. Lately, there's been this odd shift going on between his parents' relationship, thus affecting Farkle. Constant fighting would occur almost every single day and he unfortunately has to always witness. At times, he would sneak out to our place and stay for a bit. There was this one time that he actually stayed a whole week! Things must be pretty heated between the two if they weren't able to notice that their son was gone for that long. 

"It'll be okay," I whisper as we both pull away. "Maybe I can see you tomorrow. You can help out with the wedding." 

"Can't. My dad's taking me to Stanford tomorrow."

"Oh, wow! That's like your dream school!"

"Yeah, he's been planning a campus tour for months." He shrugs like it was no big deal at all. Me being the best friend, I can tell that he's secretly very excited. 

"I hope you have fun." 

"Thanks. Well, I better get going." He offers me one last squeeze before heading out. I honestly would've sent him out, but I was way too beat. I decided to call it a day and fall right into bed hoping that tomorrow will do me good.

- - - 

The next day, I woke up bright and early just as my mother told me to do so. I quickly got ready by doing my usual morning routine: Brush my teeth, shower, get dressed, and curl my hair. Today, I decided to throw on a rose-patterned sundress along with my favorite white cardigan that my mom had given me. It's kind of like a protection shield if you ask me. When I'm in trouble and I have this on, it's like Topanga's there with me, which obviously makes me feel safe. 

I slip on a pair of brown sandals before grabbing my camera, thinking that they might want some photos of the whole set up process. I sling the leash over my shoulder and climbed down the stairs. As I was heading down, I was instantly greeted by the smell of my mother's famous Blueberry Surprise Breakfast, a personal favorite. Topanga would either prepare blueberry flavored pancakes, waffles, or bagels. Today, it was the waffles. 

"Good morning, honey! Thank you so much for waking up early. Your father and Auggie are still sound asleep, so we'll probably meet them at the venue later in the day," She explains, stuffing a waffle inside a ziplock bag and handing it to me. "Meanwhile, you and I need to head over there right now. So, eat this on the drive." 

I take the bag and nod. "Alrighty." 

We both then head straight for the door. "Nice cardigan, by the way." She jokes. 

"Yeah, the person who gave it to me truly has a great sense of style." I giggle. 

- - - 

On the way, Topanga pretty much explains everything I need to know: The wedding ceremony will take place down by the beach. Right afterwards, everyone will walk over to this grand hotel, which luckily is walking distance from where they're at. There, the reception will take place. I can already tell that most of Angela and Topanga's magic will be manifested into this part of the evening. 

Once we arrived, we were immediately greeted at the sight of Angela scurrying around. Spotting us, she waves. "Oh good, you're here!" 

"Indeed I am!" Topanga beams.

Angela then grabs both of our arms and drag us into the wedding suite. "I know we only started yesterday, but I feel like all of it's already coming together! I can't wait for you two to see it." When we step inside, I hear myself gasped louder than ever before. 

"Wow, it's amazing."

Tables and chairs were already set up where they're supposed to be, just awaiting its silk fabrics that they need to be covered in and the centerpieces, which I hopefully get to be in charge of. Fairy lights were also hung up everywhere, which makes the place look incredibly magical. Even though there is still so much that needs to be done, the place already looks pretty nice. I can best assure that once the extra decor is set into its place, everything would turn out phenomenal. 

Suddenly, a tall red-headed lady approaches us with a smile. "Topanga!" She exclaims, giving my mother a hug. "I am so glad that you're here!"

"As am I! I can't believe this all finally happening," She says, looking around the room in amazement just as I did. She then turns to me. "Oh, Riley, this is Rachel. You probably don't remember her but  trust me, she definitely was a big part of your childhood." Topanga chuckles. And so I've heard. Both my parents have told me about how Rachel would take care of me as a baby. From hearing all the stories, I thought she was pretty darn cool.

"Hi," I greet as politely as I possibly can. 

Rachel cups her hands over her mouth. "Oh my gosh, Angela was right! You're growing up such a beautiful little lady, I hardly even recognized you." She instantly pulls me into a bear hug and rocks me back and forth. 

"Alright, so my itinerary says that we have a meeting with catering soon." Topanga interrupts, bringing us back on track. 

"Correct. The head chef is waiting for us in the kitchen." Rachel says. 

"Yes, and we need to start testing out audio/visual, so Riley, if you could head on over to the storage room and fetch a couple microphones that'd be fantastic." Angela requests. 

"Oh, sure. But where exactly is-" 

"Thank you, sweetie!" She exclaims before the three of them head towards the kitchen. Well, alrighty then. I think to myself. Guess I need to find the storage room myself. 

Before I do so, though, I take a few photographs here and there.  I then scan the room in search for the storage room, but failed to spot it. It must be outside then.

I exit the wedding suite and make my way down the hotel's hallway, hoping to find an employee that could help me out. 

As I was walking, I suddenly hear a soft melody playing from one of the rooms. Intrigued, I decided to investigate. I let myself into what seemed to be an awfully dark room. I could still see, but just barely. Barely enough to realize that I am currently inside a theater. Foldable chairs were placed all over the room and right up ahead was a small stage. I figured that one hit wonders or old artists would perform here. 

The sound was coming from the far end of the stage. I walk ever so quietly so whoever it may be won't see me. The closer I got to the stage, the louder the sound becomes. Next thing you know, I hear a voice. A guy's voice. He was humming along to the tune that he was playing, which was very, very beautiful. I then see him. A boy, who looked around my age, was sitting crossed-legged on the very back corner of the stage. He was surrounded by a ton of music equipment, so I couldn't really get a good look at his face. However, I could still see him delicately plucking the strings of his guitar whilst slightly swaying back and forth. I was wonderstruck at the sight.  Everything about the guy seemed so intriguing and mysterious, yet familiar. I scratch my head at the thought. 

Why does he look familiar?

I pulled out my camera and zoomed in, thinking that I could probably get a good look at him this way. For a split second, I saw him. But to my horror, I accidentally press the shutter-release button and the sound my camera makes stops him from playing. Shit. 

He turns around and looks off into the room. "Hello? Who's there?" 

Maybe if I slowly tip-toed towards the door, he won't notice. But I could never. The door was too far away, and besides, he'd probably see me leave. I take a deep breath before revealing myself. I slowly merge from the darkness, and wait- I remember him! He was the guy I ran into at the beach yesterday. 

His emerald green eyes, ones that have looked into mine before, widened at the sight of me. He remembers me. 

"Who let you in? And why were you taking photos of me?" He asks in a slightly stern tone. 

"I-I'm so sorry. Uh- I really didn't mean to. I-I-" I stutter anxiously. I take a second to stop myself from committing another act of embarrassment. "Look. I'm taking photos for the wedding that's happening here," I partially lie. I technically am taking the photos, but I'm more so on my quest to find the storage room. "How did you get in, I should ask. Are you the wedding singer?" 

The boy raises an eyebrow. "Am I the wedding singer?" 

"Yeah, are you practicing?" I start to slowly move towards him. "Because if so, I wouldn't do that song if I were you."

"And why not?" 

"Because," I say looking right up at him. God, his eyes are so mesmerizing. "Because it sounds so sad." 

He doesn't speak. Instead, he stares at me as if I was an alien from another planet. I begin to endure this familiar sinking feeling that I've become very much familiar with, especially from Charlie. I realize that I should probably leave before I start becoming even more anxious than I already am. "Well, it was nice meeting you. Good luck at the wedding." I say with burning cheeks and I turn to go.

[notquiteapex]

Journey to the Center of a Kilogram (of a Spool of Plastic)

The average single kilogram spool of plastic for 3D printers is $20 USD. Previous Post!

So last time I showed off my plans for the next iteration of the case. This time, I'll show off what I've come up with, the logistical reasoning, and the next steps. Simple stuff!

Everything shown still isn't final, and won't be used since it's made of a plastic called PLA, polylactic acid. It's a great beginner's filament, but it has a low warping temperature as well as just not being very sturdy. The best option in terms of easy printing and high temp is a plastic called PETG, polyethylene terephthalate glycol. It's much sturdier than PLA, about as expensive, can withstand higher temperatures, and also prints relatively easily. The plan is to use only a single kilogram of plastic that's inexpensive, and any extra parts can be bought at a hardware store or online for super cheap.

Here's the almost assembled PC and case! All the parts in it are either backup parts, taken from my current PC for test fits, or just dead. It was never hooked up to power.

It actually all fits together nicely, which I wasn't expecting. Heck, even the PSU mount held up way better than I thought it would.

I don't use more than 2 PCIe slots, so I used the space to add an 80mm fan. Fits nicely! Any other PCIe cards (such as a wifi card) I'll just remove the bracket and route anything I need with some tape, but I doubt I ever will. The IO Shield for the motherboard is also missing so I couldn't test fit it, though based on previous prints I've done with my home server it should be fine.

I had to print the bottom half where the slots go in an awkward way. Due to the protrusion of the mounting mechanism for PCIe brackets, I had to print the surrounding surface area with supports, leading to a kind of disgusting look to it. I also need to remeasure slot spacing and screw hole placement. I plan to try and find a way to simply ignore the mounting mechanism or make it separable for better printing.

Here's a close up of that PSU mount by the way. It holds the bottom of the PSU very well, and its a snug fit. I the picture above showing the PCIe slots, you can also see the screws going in like a standard case has. Nice and secure. There's also a small bridge to connect the two halves together to help with assembly, although it works better when there's no plastic warping.

So currently the main body has to be printed in 4 separate pieces. Not ideal, but there's a solution. It's possible to "solder" plastic together, because after printing the plastic can still be reheated. A simple soldering iron, some extra plastic, and some patience will let you combine big pieces into even bigger ones. Though it'll still help to have some mounting points for various things to connect them, which I plan to add.

Here it is standing all nice and proper on its own! Well, its mainly the motherboard connecting everything, good thing it was already a dead one. Soldering plastic will help with rigidity and it just being able to stand on its own. I also plan to add some circle brackets to the back to help add extra support, as well as some around the frame. Other things like the radiator and fans will provide additional binding strength.

Here's the most up to date design, with a bit of before and after. I had to add some holes in the back for pressure fit brackets to help hold it all together, and removed some extra bits to reduce plastic usage, as well as move some stuff around to help better fit everything.

A massive concern of mine is using as little plastic as possible, so only one spool would need to be purchased to print the whole case, and some extra money spent on supplies like screws and fan covers like the ones below. They'll help to cut down cost of plastic while providing a faux-grille to the fans to protect against dust.

That's it for now, gotta go back to CAD'ing. Maybe next time I'll have it printed enough!

By the way, all the PLA plastic I use can and will be recycled. I have some friends that can crush and re-extrude it for me, so this testing isn't a waste of anything other than time and electricity (which isn't my problem how that's made currently! hopefully the power companies go green soon.)