#though i discovered evan when i watched murder house

[fear-is-truth]

Every girl's canonical event is watching American Horror Story just to see Evan Peters💋

touché. though i must say, the rest of the cast rlly kept me hooked + the gratuitous violence is quite enjoyable. #just girly things

[lokifantasies]

The Trial PART 1

Summary: The long awaited trial against Evan Nichols has started, and the foundation of the case against him has been laid out.

WARNING: GRAPHIC TORTURE AND SEXUAL ABUSE EXPLAINED.

Character(s): Loki, Thor, Jade, & Evan

Read the Mischievous Life series here!

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The trial is here. It's the day that your family has been waiting for since this whole nightmare started. Unfortunately, Loki and Jade are both adamant that you remain on bed rest for the sake of the growing baby, and you ultimately end up losing the argument when you try to force them to let you come. Loki assures you that he'll be by her side for the both of you – supporting her the entire time.

In the back of your mind, you know the stress of hearing and seeing the evidence would be too much for you, and no one wants to see anything happen to your baby. Thankfully, Thor also appears to support his niece and brother – sitting on Jade's right as Loki sits on her left.

"I don't wanna see him," Jade mutters – looking down to the floor when Evan walks into the courtroom with his parents.

The teenager looks like he's injured – his leg has a slight limp, and his eye is swollen and dark. However, the seventeen-year-old has a smug smile on his face – his ego being stroked when he sees the television cameras on him. He takes his seat in between his lawyers, and they group together to discuss something quietly. Loki, Thor, and Jade try their hardest to hear what they're saying, but they're speaking far too quietly.

"I don't understand how he could have a defense," Thor says to you and Loki. "How can anyone deny that he did what he did?"

You shrug. "I don't know, Uncle Thor. I just want this to be over with."

The prosecution begins their opening statement by laying out all the facts of the case and making it clear what Evan Nichols is being tried for. His charges are as follows:

- 1st degree aggravated kidnapping

- 1st degree sexual assault (with forcible penetration)

- 1st degree sodomy

- Conspiracy to commit a kidnapping

- Conspiracy to commit a felony

- Felony stalking

- Harassment

- Attempted murder

- False imprisonment

- Assault with a deadly weapon

The first few witnesses to testify are the first responders who saved Jade from the small space she was being held in.

"Could you please state your name for the court and how you became involved in this case?" the prosecutor, Mr. Jeff Bards, began to question the officer.

"Brian David Wilson. I'm an NYPD SWAT officer who responded to the 911 call to 4892 E Graves Road," the witness explains.

"What happened upon arriving at the address?"

The officer took a deep breath before speaking. "We, the SWAT team, forced our way inside the house, and we started searching. I began to hear some muffled pleas for help, and when I followed them, I came across the fake wall in the home's basement. After removing the fake wall, I discovered that there was a small crawl-space type room."

"Can you confirm what the photo on the screen is?" Mr. Bards asks – a photo of the tiny, dark space where Jade had been held showing up on the screen.

"Yes, that is the crawl-space," he confirms

"And where was Ms. Lokisdottir located?"

"She was located in the back corner of the crawl space. She came out from hiding when she saw me, and I pulled her out of the space," officer Wilson stops to take a deep breath and gather his thoughts – trying to push his feeling aside. "Afterward, I carried her out of the house and to the ambulance that was waiting outside."

There's silence as the officer exits the witness stand – looking towards Jade and Loki as he goes to take his seat in the rows. The other officers testify – stating similar things to what the first one did. Then, everyone hears the fateful words.

"The prosecution calls Jade Pandora Lokisdottir to the stand, please."

Loki and Thor wrap their arms around the shaking sixteen-year-old – remind her that they're right there, and if she needs to, just look at them and they'll help her.

"You can do this, my love," Loki says softly. "Just pretend you're having a conversation."

"Okay," Jade nervously breathes out.

Thor hugs his niece close before she stands up. "You are so strong, Jade...just like your parents. You got this."

Jade exhales and nods – trying to walk up to the witness stand without falling. On the way, she refuses to look at the defense's side of the courtroom – disgusted as to how anyone could defend Evan.

Oh well, everyone has a right to a defense.

For a moment, Jade looks towards Evan. A smirk appears on her face when she sees his injuries – wondering who she needs to thank for the revenge. Before Jade turns her attention away, Evan takes the chance to blow a kiss towards her – excited to watch the goddess relive the nightmare he put her through.

"Could you please state your name for the court?" the prosecutor asks – looking directly at Jade.

"Um," Jade's voice is soft against the microphone. "Jade...Pandora Lokis-Lokisdottir."

"And can you tell the court how you came to know the defendant?"

Jade takes a deep breath and exhales – looking towards Loki and Thor for support. "Ye-yes. Um, we met at the mall when my parents took me shopping before the school year started. That weekend, we went out on a date, and then we started dating."

"Were you and the defendant ever sexual?

"Not...really," Jade answers. "Um, we only ever had oral sex, but that's it. I wa-wasn't comfortable with ever going any further than that."

"So, there was never any consensual sexual intercourse?"

"No."

"How long were you and the defendant dating?"

"Four months."

"During that time, did the defendant act inappropriately towards you in any sort of way?"

Jade exhales. "Yes. The last night we hung out together, he tried to force himself on me, but he ran away and drove off when I yelled for my dad."

"Ms. Lokisdottir, can you walks us through the day of September 3rd?"

Jade shakes her head and exhales nervously – looking towards Loki and Thor for their support. This is the first time she's ever spoken about what happened to her, and hopefully, it'll be the last.

"I was...at school, and Evan told me he wanted to speak with me privately, so I followed him out into the parking lot to smoke marijuana and talk in his car. When we got to his car, though, he locked the doors, and he took off from the parking lot." Jade swallows hard before continuing. "Um...I begged for him to stop and turn around – just let me go back to school, and I wouldn't tell anyone. But he didn't. He kept driving – pulling a knife from under his driver's seat and holding it to my throat. I tried to do as he said – hoping that he'd let me go, but he never calmed down. When we arrived at his house, no one was home. H-he led me into the basement and pulled a dresser away from the wall. It was a secret room behind the wall, and he made me...uh...he made me take all of my clothes off, so I was completely nude. He put a collar around my neck, and he connected it to a bolt in the floor so that I couldn't move much. He left for, I guess a couple hours, and he left me in the dark room. I remember how cold it was. It was freezing...especially since I didn't have any clothes. When he came back, he started to...do things."

"Could you explain what things were done to you by the defendant?"

Jade's eyes begin to tear up – her breathing becoming staggered as she thinks about how to word the horrific abuse she had been put through. The looks of support from Loki and Thor, however, give her a strength that she didn't know she had.

"There was...a metal bar," Jade begins quietly – biting her bottom lip to keep her thoughts going. "He had a long lighter with him, and he started to heat the bar up. He was laughing when he pressed the hot metal to my thigh – smiling at me while I screamed in pain as my skin started to burn. There's still a burn scar on my left thigh. When the bar finally cooled down, he threw it to the side. He grabbed me by the chain leash and forced me down to my knees. With his other hand, he...took his penis out of his pants and pried by mouth open. He grabbed the back of my head and used my mouth to get himself off. No matter how much I cried, and begged, and pleaded, he didn't stop. He found it entertaining. It turned him on." Jade looks out to see Loki and Thor becoming angrier by the second, but they're trying their best to remain calm for Jade's sake – knowing that they need to be her support. "After he was...finished, he uh, forced me to lie on the dirty floor. I tried to keep my legs closed, but he punched me in the face, which caused me to jump. Before I could try to close my legs again, Evan had them spread, and he began to...force his mouth...on me. I felt his teeth bite me, and I knew I was bleeding, but it seemed to turn him on even more. H-h-he reached over and grabbed the metal rod again, and h...I'm sorry...can I just...a moment?"

"Take your time," the prosecutor assures Jade – maintaining a professional composure.

Jade exhales deeply – closing her eyes and trying to gather her courage to continue.

"H-he began to use the metal rod to...assault me. He shoved it inside me – giving me cuts and bruises. I was bleeding, but he continued to thrust it in and out of me until he was satisfied. I thought he would finally be done, and I thought he'd take me home, but then I felt him begin to...insert himself...his...penis...into me. I tried to kick him off, but he held my legs as tight as he could to stop me from moving. It...I'm pretty sure he was trying to cause me pain. Finally, I stopped fighting – wanting him to just hurry up and let me go. I tried to stop crying because I didn't want him to be anymore satisfied with himself, but when I felt his fingers start to go into...the other side, I started fighting again. He pulled me up by the chain, and he forced me to look into his eyes. I remember he said that I was now his slut, and he was going to break me until I learned to love it. After a couple of minutes...he...ejaculated into me, which later resulted in a pregnancy. Evan was still wanting more though, so he turned me over and held my face to the floor as he entered my backside. Again, ignoring my cries and screams for him to stop. I lost track of how many times he did this...I think I may have blacked out or something, or maybe my brain made me forget in order to protect me from the memory, but the next thing I remember was being alone, redressed, and I heard the police officers calling out for me."

"Thank you, Ms. Lokisdottir," the prosecutor says with a proud smile.

[langdxn]

Can we perhaps get Evan's boys seeing Reader naked for the first time? Please 👀

ohhh i love this! thank you for bringing back my love for Evan’s boys, i’ve struggled with inspiration for them lately and this truly helped 🖤

Waking up naked beside Tate isn’t something you expected when you first moved into the Murder House, but your first night together was spent in total darkness, not turning on his bedroom light to avoid alerting the rest of the ghosts. As you untangle yourself from the sheets and lunge across the room for your clothes, a groggy voice behind you confirms he’s spotted your great escape. “If you’d told me you were this beautiful, I’d have turned the lights on last night,” he smirks to himself as he paces to join you, his eyes wandering your form intently. As you reach the bathroom mirror, Tate slips both hands around your waist and gazes at you both in the reflection. “Come back to bed, babe,” he whispers into the shell of your ear. “I already miss the way you purr for me.”

Your first time with Kit is an unfettered, romantic affair, your brunette heartthrob setting a sensual pace as he slowly peels away your clothing. A soft gasp escapes him with every inch of your skin he exposes, a grateful smile beaming across his lips while he works you down until you’re completely stripped on his bed. “Look at you,” he coos as his eyes hungrily consume your every curve. “You’re a real doll, you know that?” His antiquated expression takes a little while to sink in as a compliment, but once those words leave his lips it’s not long before they’re firmly pressed into your collarbone, planting searing hot kisses wherever his eyes lay on your skin. His lips journey south through the valley of your breasts and stall suddenly. “Make yourself comfortable sweetheart, I’ll be kissing every inch of you tonight.”

Let’s face it, it’s not physically possible to knock on a tent door. Jimmy didn’t know how to announce his arrival in your tent while you were dressing to watch his rehearsal later, which explains why he froze at the entrance while unable to tear his eyes away from your bare form as you deliberated over two dresses draped over the bed. “The black one looks beautiful,” he half-whispers to avoid scaring you, sighing softly as you turned around. “You’d look stunning in either though, Mrs Darling.” He glides over to you and plants his clawed hands firmly on your butt. “You know, you should join the show someday,” he giggles between butterfly kisses planted into the nape of your neck, his gentle breaths sending shivers down your spine. “Because this ass is freakishly perfect!”

Checking into your room at the Hotel Cortez was going just fine until you closed your room door behind you and discovered a dapper gentleman in the armchair, waiting for you. “My my,” James declares in an eloquent drawl. “Sally picked a thing of beauty for me tonight.” You’re frozen to the spot, immobilised by his predatory, consuming gaze. “Little hummingbird, I can hear your heart rate from across the room. I suggest you lose all of your frightfully unnecessary clothing for me, before I put an end to that oh-so-frantic pulse forever.” With an impatient rap of his cane on the carpet, you feel compelled to obey the stranger’s orders, standing naked in moments in front of your intruder. “Just as beautiful without those garments,” he leers with a curl of his pencil moustache and a flash of his pearly white teeth. “I have a feeling I might just keep you.”

You’re taking a shower in the cult’s communal bathroom when you hear a throat clear behind you — it’s not entirely clear how long Kai has been leaning against the doorway watching you, but judging by his ear-to-ear smile, it’s been a while. “Don’t stop on my account,” Kai coughs irreverently, holding his hands up in faux surrender as you hastily cover your modesty with both hands. “Curiosity killed the Republican, I guess.” He saunters slowly over to you and takes hold of your hand concealing your breasts, prizing it away from your dripping skin and holding it in the air while his gaze wanders your figure. “Say thank you,” he hums under his breath as his free hand snakes around your waist, his clothes soaking and clinging to his skin. “Say ‘thank you for coming to fuck me in the shower, Divine Ruler.’”

[killerhatcanons]

Hi me again,, how about a hc where y/n is finding out what Evan (Trapper), Michael and Danny (Ghosty) are doing and want's to "join" them? Like helping them with what they are doing? 🤔😳

oooo yes!! I’ll make this one pre-entity then just bc yk... everyone knows what they do in the game so heheh

The Trapper (Evan MacMillan)

you’re his wife in this because idk old times he probably married you quickly

he probably kept the basement locked and forbid you from going inside

it’s basically where he keeps and repairs all his killing gear (bear traps, cleaver, etc.)

accidentally leaves it unlocked while out for work one day

you find the basement door open and finally get a look inside

as he returns home you greet him as you always would and let him kiss your head

he then moves to go to the basement to find the door wide open

freezes in shock, cold sweat running down his back

he knows there’s no way you didn’t see

you walk up behind him and put your arms around him

“Y/n did you...” he whispers still frozen before snapping out of this state, grabbing your wrists to pin you against the wall and yelling at you asking how much you saw

you tell him everything and that it’s okay and that you vowed to be with him in all times after all

he’s still mad and on edge about it and doesn’t want you to help him

he doesn’t want his precious wife to stain her hands with blood after all

you help him clean his gear when he’s out but that’s about all he’ll let you do really

The Shape (Michael Myers) (finally got his name right I apologize we have a similar name commonly with another e in my native language and I kinda skipped to that haha)

it’s not like he’s hiding killing people from anyone really, you might have just been a bit oblivious

you finally get the hint when he walks in with a knife and bloodstains all over himself

you’re shocked at first but you’re in love, what can you do

so you ask him if you can help him

he isn’t the most effective teacher due to not talking but he’ll still show you how to hold the knife and how to stab properly

will also show you how to stalk but let’t be real just standing around uncovered on a street isn’t too hard to understand

you suggest maybe hiding while stalking but he thinks that’s useless effort and standing works just fine

will maybe also steal get you an overall because he thinks it’s convenient for killing

don’t get in his way tho, if you do he’ll just lift you and put you aside motioning for you to wait

you’re kinda nervous about it first but you get used to it eventually, his calm demeanor helping with that

The Ghostface (Danny Johnson)

Danny wants you to find out ok

not right away but eventually

to be honest he probably just wants to see the fear in your eyes when you realize how dangerous he is and get off to it

will leave a bit of costume hanging out of a drawer on purpose, then acts like he’s leaving but actually hides around the house waiting for you to discover the mask, cloak, knife and his photo collection on his camera

you eventually do and he watches as your expression changes from confusion to shock

“Look at that, I guess you finally found out huh?”

will get close to you, play with your hair and ask with a devilish grin if you’re afraid now

you do realize you should probably run but your first instinct is to lean forward and kiss him (maybe you also find it kinda hot knowing how dangerous he is)

now it’s his turn to be confused

you proceed to tell him you love him and that this won’t stop you

honestly he’s kind of amazed

“that would make you my accomplice, you know that right?”

when you nod and say you want to be he gets excited and wants to tell you everything about his murders

says you can’t join him though because it’s safer if he does it himself but you can stay his accomplice, give him alibis and help him with the planning and cleaning if you want

“As a murder accomplice I, instead of the law, shall have the honor of punishing you for your sins”

and we all know where that goes

ok i hope this was ok haha oop ill write the other one we talked about next owo

[halothenthehorns]

All in the Family

Chapter 47: The Firebolt

Sounds of jubilation rang in Alice's ears before the rest of her senses had even caught up with her. The place smelt strongly of wood polish and she flinched in surprise when something bright red looked like it was fixing to sock her in the face. She stumbled back in surprise and managed to tip over a whole casket of something that went spinning across the floor in every direction.

"Alice?" Frank called in concern as she muscled her way around what she finally recognized as Quaffles, the projectile charmed to be spinning in place showing off its new apparent aerodynamics on display.

"Over here," she called from the corner and following the loud noise around the mess of balls she made to find herself in the store proper, Quality Quidditch Supplies.

Frank sprinted over to her in relief, still shaking wood shavings out of his hair. "Sorry love, I landed in a pile of Make-Your-Brooms, I think some little kid was in the process of carving something into the handle when I interrupted." He caught her hand as he continued to look about. "Do you know where we are? I think that's Diagon Alley past that window, but-"

"You've never been in Quality Quidditch Supplies?" Alice asked in surprise.

"Me mum never brought me in here," he shrugged. "Thought the sport was a bloody waist."

"It's no wonder you wouldn't help me practice for the Beater tryouts next year," she laughed in surprise as his chagrin grew. "Don't worry love, I'll help you learn how to ride a broom over the summer, if you want," she quickly finished.

"I, ah, could give it a try," he uneasily agreed, clearly putting more enthusiasm into his voice than he meant. "Can't be worse than Neville's first try, eh?"

The two exchanged a look of pure love and excitement, their future spanning before them in that moment as Alice's mind corrected the instance, of teaching her son all about a sport she'd loved for ages.

Lily came over to them then with a deeply annoyed expression seemingly frozen in place. "Well, no use in expecting any of them to help us find the book soon. They seem to have reconsolidated their friendship by acting like even bigger loons than usual, if you can believe it."

Alice saw a beach-ball sized Snitch now being tossed into the air at the front of the store and believed her without question. She tugged her boyfriends hand and began waving Lily off to the side, "there's a collection of Quidditch manuals and how-to's on the far wall over there, we should start there."

They found Regulus there flipping enthusiastically threw Brooms to Buy. He began jabbering without even looking up, "these designs are fantastic! I can't believe how sleek the models become in a few short years! Do you think they worked out the design flaw of-"

He did look up then and flushed in surprise to see who it was.

Alice smiled politely and encouraged him to finish, "you mean the tailwind on the Cleensweep models? I sure hope so. I've been angling to save up for a new Silver Arrow because of it."

Regulus blinked several times in confusion, before a smile slowly lit his face. "You follow Quidditch?"

"It's a thing me and my mum love," she agreed. "I was going to try out for the house-team next year."

"We might be playing against each other then," he stated, and to her surprise she saw some excitement beginning to light his usual dower expression.

"You already on then?" Frank asked, eyeing the third year, who seemed almost miniscule to them sometimes being two years older.

"Yep, though I've only been a reserve player so far. The usual Seeker has actually been in the Hospital Wing all week though, so if he didn't make it out by classes today, I got to play in the match next week!" He exclaimed in pure child-like delight, then his face clouded over as he muttered in confusion what day of the week it was supposed to be exactly.

"I hope things work out for you then," Alice told him sincerely as Lily had long since lost interest in the conversation and perused every spine along here, but between the cover of Witch Weekly being dominated by some person with a surly face and heavy dark eyebrows, and a copy of Quidditch through the ages, not finding the book they needed.

Regulus nodded, blinked again in surprise as if just realizing who he'd been talking to, and managed the most friendly smile any of them had seen as he waved them off and began flipping through the magazine again.

"He's a weird kid," Frank muttered as they went traveling aimlessly down the isles of the store now with no clue where to look next, and not in any big hurry to be done and put in a more unpleasant place to use magic to find it. "Sometimes he's so hostile I feel like I can't take my eyes off him, then other's, he's..." he struggled to put into words what they'd just seen.

"A normal kid," she offered politely. "I'm still trying to figure that out as well. Seems he really only gets defensive when his big brother starts pushing his buttons and the pureblood issues come up. Makes you wonder what his home life's like," she finished with a sigh, eyes on Lily as she watched a Bludger go sailing over their head without interest. They heard it crash somewhere in the back of the store, and they all steered clear and went to the front instead.

The Marauders were beside themselves with pure energy, clearly all that candy they'd inhaled had taken hold. Black and Pettigrew were responsible for the majority of the objects being thrown around, unable to handle one for any length of time before daring the other to throw it, and the other complying. Lupin was sitting on the counter with an indulgent smile in place, occasionally waving his wand to fix something right only so his friends could go at it again. Potter was conspicuously missing.

"You lot have no restraint!" Evans snapped as a pile of Puddlemere United towels crashed into the floor from their wild antics. "Would you have some bloody respect for one place?"

"Live a little Evans!" Pettigrew called back, before he burst into a mad fit of laughter that almost sounded like a shriek. He jumped onto the space beside his friend and began hanging from the rafters in the ceiling, scrambling madly to lift the rest of himself up there.

Alice felt a bit of pity for him, it couldn't be easy to learn of this kind of future and the lad seemed to be taking his words to heart and enjoying himself to the fullest now. His friends were clearly indulging this. She turned away, and finally spotted the book. Potter was unintentionally drooling on it and didn't even seem to realize it, as it was propped on the display next to the Firebolt.

She darted over there as well, eyeing the beautiful, sleek design with relish. It looked fast just simply sitting there in the sun, she couldn't imagine the feel of one beneath her. She was surprised Potter wasn't crashing around the store on it yet.

As if reading her mind, he groaned in pain, "it's a display model only, not the bloody real thing."

"That's almost fair," she sighed with longing. "I can't imagine any security charms in the world would stop someone from trying to steal it." Her mind was already putting together Potter discovering this by trying to take one along with him now.

He looked to her in surprise, it looked almost painful for him to drag his eyes away, but clearly hearing her tone. "You like Quidditch?"

"Why does everyone seem so surprised by this?" She pouted.

"You've barely said a thing when Harry's games were going on," he shrugged.

"I like to play it, don't have much enjoyment for listening to it," she said back, while finally and reluctantly grabbing the book.

"Enjoy the chapter then, seems we'll be getting skipped forward to one of Harry's matches," Potter gave her a genial wave and went back to panting over the broom.

Alice wasn't so sure, the timeline didn't seem right for it at all as she'd thought Harry was just starting his winter break, but opened the book curiously to read the chapter title, which gave things a little more context.

Pettigrew fell from the ceiling in surprise, and didn't even seem to notice. "Harry's going to get a Firebolt!"

Alice gazed fondly at the picture, which didn't at all do justice to the lovely bit of wood in the window.

"I guess losing his Nimbus model changed his mind about getting a new broom like that," Frank laughed at the kids indulgence. "Poor lad needs a pick me up I'm sure," he finished more quietly, eyes still on Black who looked like he was trying to do a cart wheel for reasons beyond both of them.

The excitement of this news made everything feel like there was a new energy around it, even the dampening opening reminding them all how Harry was taking this news. It was clear the Marauders were trying very hard not to even listen, the three even abandoning the front counter to join their friend at the window and talking painfully loudly about anything they could think of.

Alice couldn't do the same, and not just because she was the one telling of poor Harry's suffering turned to hatred towards Black. She watched the teen flinch and edge even closer to his best friend, throwing an arm around Lupin like he was trying to hold himself upright at his soon to be godsons feelings. She'd been wondering about her own future ever since she'd learned about Neville, worried why her son never mentioned his parents and was raised by Frank's mother. If her son hated his parents even a fraction of what Harry was feeling for someone he should have been so close with, she didn't know how she'd be able to live with that. She honestly wished she had a better answer for him rather than more accusations.

Lily listened as Harry's friends tried to cheer him up, and Harry wouldn't let them as he reminded Malfoy may have been aware of this news. She vividly remembered the brats words to Harry about the elder Black, Sirius, and how she'd wondered if somehow he and Lupin were in on that horrible murder together. Now with this new information of learning their friend was involved, she wasn't so sure, but then how had the child of a Death Eater been so informed of the event? Was it really possible they'd both turn on their friend in a few years? What of Potter? The longer she thought of this the less sense it made.

Frank hoped that Harry going to visit Hagrid would help him. He needed someone to vent at, an adult in his life who would be a solid presence in this troubled time. He'd never known his dad, but thought he'd be a lot like Hagrid if he hadn't been killed by Death Eaters.

James turned to actually watch Alice with concern and surprise of what was wrong with Hagrid, then they all muttered, "I'd forgotten about that hippogriff."

"I say we start a Quidditch team for him!" Peter said at once, breaking off and making a run for the isles. "The Hogwarts Hippogriffs!"

"I don't think they'll give a school an international team," James snorted as he followed after him.

"If they did, we'd have to form one giant team, and the body count would never end," Remus snickered as he trailed after them.

Sirius hesitated to follow, eyes still lingering on the book. His friends refused to treat him any differently no matter what came to light, but he'd noticed these three with something new on their faces from that last chapter. It had not passed his notice Regulus had been about to draw his wand on someone either, for him. He felt like he owed all of them, something. A peace offering, a thanks, an apology, he wasn't sure, but some way to show he really wasn't this mad man of the future. He'd never really cared what anyone thought of him in school before, but this was different, he didn't want anyone to think he was capable of this! Now it was clear they were reconsidering and even agreeing with the Marauders something was going on about this story, now how to reinforce this when Harry's opinion of him was lower than ever?

Harry helping his friend to save the hippogriff was too sweet, almost sickly so, Regulus wanted to laugh. Hagrid was certainly one strange person, crying over a beast. He wondered idly, as he found a nice chair to sit in and continue flipping through his magazine, how Hagrid had survived Azkaban for as long as he'd been there. Regulus froze when he even realized Hagrid and Sirius would have been in there at the same time. He shivered and was happy for the change of topic to Harry getting Christmas gifts, especially that new broom he'd already snuck a peek at.

The boys ideas of who had sent it to him all had merit, he could even hear echoes throughout the store of varying people's ideas, most of them thinking it was McGonagall or Dumbledore again. Regulus wondered if they were really missing a rather obvious person, Sirius. He was certain he cared enough about Harry to use money he claimed no right to.

There was some scattered sympathy again for Scabbers once again being chased by that cat, and quite a few mutters when Hermione only made her position worse by worrying over who sent the broom instead of just enjoying the gift! He rolled his eyes even harder when he in fact heard the other Muggleborn present voicing this same worry Harry should not just be accepting this gift without question. He'd probably agree, if he thought there was anyone out to hurt Harry that wasn't around the last two years. He'd finally had to admit to himself there was no doubt Sirius was innocent of these crimes, and there was just no reason he'd be 'going after,' Harry.

Once again nobody seemed to give much of a passing notice to Lupin being absent for his health. It was a common enough thing for him in school, seemed he never grew out of that.

Remus flushed at this being pointed out anyways, then paused in confusion as the potion Snape was apparently making for him was again mentioned with no real understanding of it all. There was just no chance it was a coincidence. Snape knew he was a werewolf, and was giving him something for it?

James and Peter froze in front of him with weary expressions as well, but dared not speak of this in such a compact store where anyone could hear. Instead they gladly took the distraction of McGonagall coming to confiscate Harry's broom, and very loudly spoke of how infuriated they were with Hermione going behind Harry's back like that.

"She was looking out for her friend!" Evans shot back from five isles over. "I'd hardly think you would complain about that Potter, considering that's what you've been doing for your friend since the beginning!"

"It's different!" James thundered back, but with that light back in his eyes of finally getting the chance to spare with her again openly. "I'm defending Sirius from false accusations, not tattling to a teacher so they can nick his stuff!"

There was no response, and James preened with satisfaction, seeming to think he'd finally gotten through to her. He even went jogging back over to them, Peter hurrying to keep up.

Remus was all for standing around and watching the show of Prongs and Evans again, but got distracted. "Oi, Padfoot, I found you a Whimborn Wasp Jersey with Bagman's numbers!"

"Moony, you're the best mate ever!" He'd spoken without thinking, all but apparating to the isle he was in, but froze when he reached for it and their hands brushed together.

There was a pause as the two just stood there for a moment gaping at each other.

It's stupid to flush like some school girl, Sirius quickly corrected himself, he knew what you meant! Their fingers were still overlapped over the bright yellow stripes.

The two hadn't found an alone moment in quite some time now, and the more this kept happening the more charged the air became between them. They'd agreed to hold off the awkward conversation of whatever this was and include James and Peter in it, but that had been when they'd thought they were just traveling through Harry's first year. Now all of this horrible new information kept coming up between them all, the two honestly just wanted an escape.

Remus cleared his throat and finally stepped back, effectively putting the conversation off again like it had never been turned back on. "Well, put it on before Smith finishes!"

Neither gave a single care to the exclaims of surprise that Sirius could have sent Harry that broom, it felt obvious to them, and it's not as if this news would change anyone's opinion of him in either way.

Sirius shucked his bag, slipped out of his school robes and threw them off without care, grinning as he exposed his top half and Remus cleared his throat again. It wasn't anything the other hadn't seen over the past five years of sharing a room in the morning, he told himself, but he still found himself preening a bit and hesitating longer than he should have before pulling it on.

Moony caught his eyes and smiled again, whispering, "perfect fit," as they were teleported away.

[averylilyevans]

it’s your life

i found this old post of mine recently and decided to give it a little update! i was so young when i wrote it, so i had some new ideas to freshen it up. naturally i did this instead of doing my organic post-lab. here it is! 

first year is full of frustration and unfamiliarity and a twinge of homesickness. it’s being sorted into a different house than sev, being top of your year, being the one person potter seems to seek out most. it’s befriending marlene and dorcas and mary, staying up late at night while they tell you about all the wizarding world has to offer. it’s discovering quidditch (which you hate) and celestina warbeck (whom you love). it’s trying every candy that marlene’s older brother brings back from honeydukes and accidentally walking through the bloody baron.

second year is sending a tickling charm potter’s way after he calls sev “snevillus.” it’s your first detention directly after, too, and definitely worth it. it’s figuring out remus’ secret and not telling a soul - not even him for the longest - but you don’t care (how could you?) because it’s Remus we’re talking about. it’s helping mary with charms and dorcas with girls and marlene with waking up in the morning. it’s learning (and being awful at) wizards’ chess and turning your beetle into a button first try. it’s sev staring at you from the slytherin’s table and still being in awe of the great hall’s twinkling sky and always taking two helpings of treacle tart.

third year is hogsmeade and arithmancy and divination and potter asking you out for the first time (you not-so-politely decline). it’s spending the majority of october with your legs dangling in the great lake, your friends giggling next to you. it’s studying with sev in the library and trying not to notice the guilty look in his eye. it’s petunia writing to you even less than before because of some normal whale of a man named vernon. it’s sharing a butterbeer with sirius black in hogsmeade because you’ve lost your friends and really, they’ll be right back, but he insists and is actually quite funny and you think you’ve rather misjudged him. it’s going to the kitchens one night with remus, because it’s been a long day and the house elves always have hot chocolate.

fourth year is slug club parties and sneaking off with benji fawcett because parties aren’t your thing and sirius couldn’t make this one. it’s waking up the next morning to marlene telling you she’d run into potter and he was looking rather dejected (you ignore the guilt in your stomach; it’s only there a moment). it’s sitting with dorcas and mary at quidditch matches, watching potter soar through the air like a bird. it’s finally having the nerve to quit divination because crystal balls and prophecies are complete rubbish anyway. it’s thinking sev has been hanging out too much with mulciber and avery and malfoy but getting excuse after excuse in response. it’s trying your first sip of alcohol with dorcas and marlene at christmas, the burn in your throat masking your worry for sev.

fifth year is when all hell really breaks loose. it’s sev asking too many questions about remus and potter being more arrogant than ever before (that sodding snitch) and being so stressed because o.w.l.s are coming up and you have to show your worth. it’s threatening potter for threatening sev by the lake and that word - the one that haunts your brain and creeps into your nightmares. it’s knowing potter didn’t deserve what you said, because your sev is too far gone and in his place is a boy who doesn’t understand what he’s doing (you hope, you pray; the alternative is too much to bear). it’s not taking points away from the marauders even though you’re a prefect, and maybe you’re abusing your power but you can’t bring yourself to care. it’s drinking firewhiskey with marlene in empty classrooms and passing your exams with flying colors. it’s more “i hate you, potter”s and “back at you, evans”s than ever before, but the bite just isn’t there. it’s partnering with peter in potions because he’s absolutely dreadful and you get the sense he feels a little less than compared to his talented friends. it’s your dad getting sick and your world falling apart and sirius and that prank and why why why?

sixth year is regaining control and desperately trying to cling onto normalcy. it’s spending more time with mary and dorcas and marlene. it’s ignoring sev every time he comes around the corner trying to get your attention because you just can’t make excuses for him anymore. it’s going to potter’s house over break after sirius says he’s run away, and the three of you drinking and laughing until the sun comes up. it’s deciding maybe there’s worse things in life than arrogant boys with good intentions. it’s hours and hours of homework and studying because you’re taking more n.e.w.t.-level subjects than anyone knew existed. it’s knowing petunia won’t write you back but sending chocolates on her birthday just in case. it’s discovering the marauders’ secret - why they’re moony, wormtail, padfoot, and prongs - and laughing uncontrollably because they’re just so bloody brilliant. it’s brewing potions for fun and enjoying life instead of just existing. it’s eating breakfast with your friends and the marauders and ignoring the feeling in your stomach when james passes you the juice you like without asking. it’s learning to apparate and mary splinching herself and spending the rest of the evening with marlene and dorcas in the hospital wing. it’s a war brewing outside the castle walls; and when mcgonagall asks if you know what you’d like to do after hogwarts, she sees the fire in your emerald eyes and knows.

seventh year is being head girl and wishing severus hadn’t gone down that road and getting upset when your friends ask you if you like james (why does he have to look so bloody perfect all the time). it’s parties that last until midnight and tutoring scared first years and sneaking into honeydukes with james to get remus chocolates after a full moon. it’s singing at the top of your lungs with marlene and swimming in the great lake with mary. it’s thinking your chance with james is gone because he’s moved on and sirius giving you a look that says are you a bloody idiot? it’s dorcas holding you as you cry because another muggle family has been killed and you don’t know how much more you can take. it’s running out onto the pitch after gryffindor wins the cup and kissing james full on the mouth in front of the whole school because his lips look soft and he’s beautiful and courageous and kind and he feels like home and why have you fought this for so long? it’s ignoring the hurt look in severus’ eye as you make your way back to the castle, james’ strong arm wrapped around your shoulders. it’s flinching when petunia says she’d never make a freak like you her bridesmaid but bringing james to the wedding just to drive her mad. it’s being scared to leave hogwarts because after all these years it’s home, and you can’t imagine a day when your nights won’t end with your friends’ laughter by the fire.

graduating isn’t like coming up for fresh air. it isn’t a week before dumbledore is owling, asking if you lot would like to join the order of the phoenix. you train for only two weeks, learning curses you shouldn’t need to know even exist. now life is missions and green light whizzing by your head. it’s the three days when sirius went missing and james couldn’t sleep or eat and you finally found him inside an abandoned building chained to the wall. it’s dorcas being murdered by voldemort himself and remus going to live with the werewolves and marlene’s entire family being gone before you have time to mourn the others and everyone around you is dying. it’s seeing severus on the battlefield for the first time and not hesitating for a moment before sending a curse his way. it’s james looking over at you as he shields you both from a bright red light and says “marry me, evans.” it’s responding “are you mad? of course i will” like you aren’t literally in the middle of a bloody war. it’s going home and kissing him like your life depends on it, and you think to yourself that maybe it does. it’s the empty spots beside mary where dorcas and marlene should be and sirius’ best man speech moving you to tears. it’s coming face to face with voldemort twice and surviving. it’s finding out you’re pregnant and telling sirius first because you’re not even twenty yet and james is out on a mission and what are we supposed to do now? it’s remus and sirius never leaving your perfect little house in godric’s hallow, insisting on being together as much as possible. it’s secretly wondering what’s going on with peter, because he hasn’t come ‘round much and you’re worried but the boys dismiss your fears. it’s wanting to make a difference - for yourself and your husband and your friends - because this world isn’t one worth living in.

going into hiding is like giving up on everything you’ve fought for. it’s harry being born and wishing your mum was there, but james has never been so proud and the look on sirius’ face when you ask him to be the godfather makes everything worth it. it’s sitting on the couch, stroking the cat that wandered into your backyard. it’s listening to james talk to harry, telling him about all the mischief the marauders got into at school. it’s wishing you could go back to those days for a while. it’s feeling like the walls are caving in on you and wondering how this happened and sobbing into james’ chest. it’s him eyeing his cloak, and you knowing he wants to take it out more than anything. it’s wishing you had kept taking divination, because it’s not rubbish - it’s ruining your family. it’s switching your secret keeper to peter at the last minute, because sirius is too obvious and he means too much and if he got hurt for you, you don’t really know what you’d do (and you know james would never forgive himself). it’s regretting not listening to your gut when the front door bursts open. it’s knowing exactly what is going to happen when james yells at you to take harry and run. it’s not having enough time to tell him how much you love him, but you look into his hazel eyes and he knows, he knows; he’s always known. it’s hearing the love of your life hit the floor and trying to protect the baby that looks so much like him behind you. it’s standing tall and strong like you always have as you place harry in his crib, the footsteps closing in. it’s being confused as to why he’s asking you to stand aside but refusing anyway. it’s thinking of sirius and remus and mary and peter as the green light reaches you.

[tinalbion]

Everything You Wanted - Brahms Heelshire x Reader

I felt the need to write this after being highly disappointed by the second film and just loving Brahms way too much, and this kinda makes me happy. I wanted to give him something better, but good things can’t be rushed. Enjoy guys, let me know if more is desired~ 

Brahms Heelshire x Reader

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Words: 3,106

Warnings: Some cursing, talk of murder and suicide

There was a hit.

It happened before anyone had caught wind of the incident outside of the UK and you were incredibly thankful for the inside tips that were sent your way, though it was thanks to the amount of money you paid for news like this. 

You had become one of the most sought after journalists in your field, which had been the more gory side of things, and you had even dabbled into the paranormal sides of it when it took an intriguing twist. It took a lot of hard work and hard-set credibility, but you climbed your way to the top and kept your position as a freelance writer.

What was even more impressive is that it had only been a few weeks since the incredibly surprising incident that took place at Heelshire Manor, and that was a difficult story to keep covered up with the two homicides -both past and present. You gathered everything you needed last minute and booked your flight to England, the anticipation of the story kept you up through the many hours during the flight, knowing damn well that it would be such a huge payoff.

You never expected anything to happen that was out of your control.

When you had finally arrived at the airport ten hours later and you were completely drained and in need of a comfortable bed, you figured you’d get some decent food in your stomach and pass out till the morning. You had made sure to pay your insider well enough to keep everything contained, but you had a set amount of time to get in, get the details, and get out. With a few more persuasive texts and another filled out check, you figured they could grant you a little bit of an extension if you needed it.   

Of course, that didn't happen as planned, instead, you picked at your food in the hotel room while scrolling over several scattered articles about the Heelshires that you managed to collect from your company before you had even gotten on the plane. It didn't make sense, and yet, you've watched so many horror movies that it did make perfect sense. The boy had apparently perished in a fire back in 1991, but somehow a strange porcelain doll had been bestowed with the same name as their son, which the Heelshire's cared for as if it were their own child out of fear. 

According to the eyewitness report of Greta Evans, she discovered that the real Brahms was alive and living within the walls of the mansion, and the reason for his parents' suicide was they wanted to be free of him. It was all so...crazy? Nah, you've heard and seen things no one would believe, this was something you had been used to for years, and it wouldn't stop here.

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Once you awoke bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, it was time to get to work, so you showered and filled your bag with everything you'd need for your trip out to the abandoned home along with planning to stop at a fast-food place for a meal to-go. The police presence was long gone and the press had even steered clear from the grounds, afraid that it was cursed. Maybe the lands were now, but that's why you were called; you would dig deep into this story and break it wide open.

 You stared up at the large mansion after you had snuck in through the iron gates, which were carelessly left open by the nosey public, and you had second thoughts about whether or not entering was a good idea as you made the long walk up the driveway. You were getting paid big money to do this, you had to keep reminding yourself that this was YOUR idea in the first place. You shook your head and pushed yourself to walk up the front steps, the large wooden door had opened easily as you pushed it and the loud creak alerted everything of your presence now. 

What if the man was still alive?

It was a bit too late to psych yourself out of this now that you were several feet within the home, the stale air filling your lungs. It hadn't even been long since the body had been found here, where a man literally lived in the walls. You silently made your way room to room, alert as you took note of everything on your small recorder. 

"February twenty-sixth, nine thirty-two am, I am standing within Heelshire Manor and it's dead silent, several smells hit you as soon as you walk in, and the overall feeling of death lingers here. The energy is strong, very strong." You click the stop button and continue to walk the room, tempted to go up the grand staircase, but you wait. 

You are sure to note any sounds you make as you walk, recording everything on another handheld recorder. Better safe than sorry. But sometimes there had been sounds you couldn't explain. The house is settling, it's old, that happens. It would only convince you for so long. 

Brahms was never found after the incident, though the paramedics had noted there had been a lot of blood that belonged to more than one person, and even Greta had stated she stabbed the man. Was he dead, did he crawl off somewhere to die in peace, or did he survive his injuries and take off to somewhere less sinister? 

He wouldn't leave. This was the only life he knew and he probably had the sense that life outside these walls would not be very welcoming to someone like him. But how would he have hidden after the police searched this place inside and out? 

The guest house, you figured. Once you heard about the story, you studied everything from the blueprints of the manor to each word that was stated in the police report. They never would have checked there if Greta didn't figure to mention it. He never left the house, anyway, so it wouldn't be too strange to write it off. 

Once you had seen all the first floor had to offer, it was time to climb the stairs. The creaking didn't surprise you, it had only heightened your senses as your body pounded with fear, because who really knew what secrets this place was holding. 

Maybe it had been your mind playing tricks, but you swore you heard something coming from the far end of the hallway, though it could have easily been rats or other creatures that feasted on flesh. The scent of blood hadn't been doused just yet. 

As you took another step forward before your foot had even tapped against the hardwood floor, you heard it again; a heavy footstep that made the floor creak ahead of you. Your heart began to pump as your body froze into place, afraid that either you interrupted a squatter in his new abode or you grabbed the attention of a cursed doll. The odds were against you regardless since you strolled into a crime scene with no way of defending yourself. Great. 

The lump in your throat tightened as you neared the far end of the hall where a door had been slightly open, and you swore you saw something rush past the opening, but again, you were so busy with trying to convince yourself that you were just imagining things. The rats that probably now occupied the walls were just making you believe that Brahms was still here. 

Your mind traveled to dark places, because what if he were here? Would he kill you, let you leave, chase you out? It was honestly a situation that could go one way or the other very quickly, and you really didn't want to find out if he'd easily bury a weapon within your gut. Although it would be amazing to see someone who was supposed to be dead twice now, to run into a potential murderer was quite the exhilarating thought. 

To be honest, you had a thing for him since the first time you read about this. A mysterious man with a troubled mind hidden within the walls, it was all so unreal, so did you take this story for the money or for the man? It wasn’t important right now since you had heard a loud thud come from a few feet ahead of you, the creaking was too loud to be anything but a person in the house with you. 

“Hello, anyone there? I’m not armed,” you stated mainly for your safety, but you also remembered that you had been recording yourself as you explored the house. You quickly whipped out the handheld recorder and clicked the button. “I’m in the Heelshire Manor, second floor, and I keep hearing movement down the hall, possibly in the walls.” Click. 

 “My name is (Y/N), I’m a journalist from America,” you began but quickly trailed off as you heard another scuffle of steps, the hairs raised on the back of your neck as you took a step back. 

The last thing you needed was to get murdered before even publishing anything about the mansion and if it was actually haunted, but you barely had time to react when you had watched a grown six-foot-tall man come from a hidden door in the wall. At first, it wasn’t something you thought that was considered real, but there he was in all his glory, just like in the report of Great Evans; a tall man with a glass face, a doll’s face.

You wanted to scream and to run out of there, hoping he wouldn’t be able to keep up with you as you made your escape, your body screaming at you to do it, but you remained there, glued to the spot. The state of him was wretched and it smelled as if he hadn’t bathed in weeks mixed with the dirt that had been caked on his clothes. It wasn’t pleasant to look at him while your heart pounded, fearful that he’d lash out at you and make sure you’d never leave the manor, but you stupidly stared at him in a mixture of awe and terror. He could tell as he stared down at you through the eyes of his porcelain mask.

The man’s head tilted to the side slightly. “What do you want…?” his gruff voice asked you as he remained a few feet away, weary of your presence. 

He was used to strangers now entering his home, but you were alone and unarmed, which had been the complete opposite of the usual frequent visitors.

“I-I’m (Y/N), as I said, I wanted to-”

“She didn’t send you, did she?” he interrupted.

You looked at him in confusion but didn’t miss a beat. “No one sent me, I came here to write a story about you and your home for my local paper…” You tried to swallow the growing lump in your throat as you stood your ground to show him you weren’t afraid, even if your face betrayed you.

He was silent as he took a cautious step forward, his fingers playing with the hem of his cardigan sleeve as he stared at you intently. 

You cleared your throat and pulled out the recorder from your pocket, the one that hadn’t been recording your entire walkthrough, and you showed it to him. “I was hoping to see if this place was haunted, but you being here proves that theory wrong.” Keeping yourself talking only helped you, lord knew how well it would work for him. “Are you Brahms Heelshire?”

He said nothing, he didn’t move a muscle as he stood there and tried to convince himself just to be rid of you, but the way you said his name without fear or disgust had him change his mind. 

With a sigh, you placed the recorder back in your pocket and continued to watch him with interest. “I’m sorry if I disturbed you, Brahms, I only wanted to talk. I can leave if you want me to.”

“No,” he snapped, though his tone softened after that as he continued to watch you.

“Okay, that’s fine with me,” you agreed and decided to just sit cross-legged in the middle of the hallway. This way, you showed to be vulnerable and willing to listen. “Come, sit.” You patted the carpeted floor in front of you as you looked up at him with a smile, the feeling of your fear receding the longer you faced off with the man. 

Brahms was hesitant at first but wanted so desperately to listen, the regularity of following rules and listening to what he had been told to do, he had craved it and missed it. Seeing how eager you were to sit with him, he bit his lip beneath the mask as he suddenly walked forward, his back hunched as he slumped down before you and mimicked your sitting position. 

This caused you to smile as you had somehow had the illusion of domestication over this alleged killer, but you hadn’t let your guard down as you came face to face with him. You held out a hand to show you were only reaching into your bag for something and you slowly pulled out a small notepad and a pencil.

Brahms had watched you carefully, his attention now on the notepad as he took the time to look at all of the scribbled drawings on the front cover, then his eyes flickered back up to yours. “What is it that you want?” His voice had gone even softer now, more child-like as he spoke to you. 

You looked up from the paper and smiled again, all fear fading as you lowered the notepad momentarily to take a better look at him. His dark hair was curly and seemed to be rather soft just by the looks of it, and you had noticed that a full beard had peeked out from under the doll mask he wore, which you already knew why he wore it. 

Be good to him and he'll be good to you.

"I was very curious to hear about what happened recently in this home, I wanted to see if there was someone still here, I hoped you were here."

This grabbed his attention. You had hoped for him? This had to be another dirty trick, they were all the same here, they would leave him or hurt him. Just like her, like Greta. 

"Me?"

"Yeah, of course!" you said rather excitedly, "I want to know about you, Brahms. I have read much about you before coming here, actually." 

What you truly wanted here was simple.

You looked at him with a lopsided grin, wondering just went on in his head at this moment as he surveyed you in silence. "You must think I'm crazy, some stranger shows up in your home and questions you, and for that, I do apologize. But ever since I read about you, Brahms, I was intrigued by you. You're alone here now, aren't you?"

The man hesitated for a moment but then nodded sadly.

Your smile faltered a little as you watched him. "You hid from them, right? You didn't want to be found so you made sure not to show any sort of presence here, yeah?"

Another nod. He felt like he could tell you more about everything that had transpired in the mansion, but he didn't know you, you had barged in here and acted as if you owned the place. Though there was something about you that made him feel comfortable, at ease in your presence which was something he hadn’t felt very often, even around his parents after so long. 

“Will you tell them I’m here?” he asked with that child-like voice, his eyes still staring into your own through the mask. 

You wondered just what his face looked like under it. “No, that’s not why I’m here. I’m here to just find out more about you and to make sure you’re okay here on your own. It must be a huge difference from having several people here to none, so I am here to make your life a bit easier.”

Why on earth you had suddenly offered your help was beyond you, but you felt the air around this man and you ached for his losses. He was alone, nowhere to go and no way to survive for long.

“In the report, it said you were stabbed, are you alright? May I see?” 

Brahms was now back on high alert as you leaned closer to him, his hands formed into fists as he quickly made it back to his feet, you following quickly after. You held up your hands and showed him you didn’t mean harm, your face giving your feelings away as he saw the pity in those pretty eyes of yours. His breathing turned heavy as he felt the need to flee back into the comfort of his own room, but you reached down into your bag and grabbed something from it.

“I figured you’d be hungry,” you offered as you slid the bag toward him on the floor, “I know it’s not much for now, but I can bring back more appropriate essentials for you if you’ll let me.”

You were baiting him, that was only partly the truth, but you did want to gain his trust and help him now that you were here, and possibly develop his trust further. After leaving the bag of food on the floor, you backed away and allowed him to take the next step, whether that was to be away from you or toward you. 

“I only want to talk to you,” you continuously assured him, “I promise you I won’t leave you.”

His head turned up to meet your gaze once again, the nightmare of the scene replayed in his head as he begged that bitch to stay, he had given himself to her and she betrayed him. It hurt both physically and mentally, he was alone now with no one to be there for him. He wasn’t even sure where to begin, many times the thought of ending it had taken hold of his thoughts, that is until you decided to stumble in. You were willingly staying here, talking to him and feeding him, was there a motive? 

Right now he didn’t mind, so long as he had you here and you wouldn’t hurt him. He wouldn’t make the same mistake twice.

And you would be the one to make him feel alive again. This was everything you wanted. 

[tasteofsmut]

TasteofSmut Fest Round Up #3

We are three weeks into the reveals, and we are absolutely overjoyed with all the beautiful creations that everyone has come up with! We hope that you’ve been enjoying them as much as we have, because there’s still one more week of reveals to go! In the meantime, if you’ve missed anything, here’s a list of lovely creations that were posted this week! Please support and shower our brilliant content creators with plenty of kudos and comments! 💌

Limbic System by dirtymudblood / @dirty-mudblood​ (FIC) Draco Malfoy/Hermione Granger

Senses: Sight (and also smell)

There are very few things that are unexplainable. Quantum entanglement, antimatter, the Fermi Paradox to name a few.

Add to the list; Hermione Granger’s inability to orgasm.

French Braid by heirblack (FIC) Lily Evans/Sirius Black

Senses: Touch and smell

A nice, relaxing, and lazy day in the Gryffindor dormitory leads into a bonding session over hair.

  Don't Waste Your Eyes on Jealous Guys by EvAEleanor / @eva-eleanore​ (FIC) Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter

Senses: Hearing, Touch

For two years now, Harry’s life has been different. Not only does he work in New York City as the Auror liaison to MACUSA on and international murder case, but he’s seen more of Draco Malfoy than he’d ever thought possible. Working with him, and spending time with him after work. During all of this time, Harry has watched him going back to his shitty boyfriend over and over again. The worst thing about all of this, he’d fallen in love with him. Maybe there’s hope for him though. Maybe for just one night...

 Love is Blind by Aneiria / @aneiria-writes​ (FIC) Draco Malfoy/Hermione Granger

Senses: Sight

‘Draco, we need to talk about what happened,’ Hermione said now, placing a cup of tea next to her partner as he sat hunched over her kitchen table. She gently laid her hand over his, guiding him towards the handle so he could drink. ‘I have to complete our report for the DMLE.

Draco Malfoy grimaced and shook his head. ‘There’s really no need, Granger,’ he said, but she pushed on anyway. Draco had acted as bravely as any Gryffindor today, and she wanted to know why.

‘For all we knew, that curse could have been an Avada. You could have died, but you jumped in front of me without hesitation.’

‘Of course I bloody did; I’m your partner!’ he snapped back, looking in her direction with his sightless silver eyes. ‘That’s the first thing we were taught in Auror training, remember? Always have your partner’s back.’

  Because Six Ate Seven by VexLonely / @vexlonely​ (FIC) Draco Malfoy/Hermione Granger

Senses: Sight

"Draco Malfoy had started gardening for stress relief, but looking down at his delicate failures, he seethed.

He had never seen Number Seven out in the garden, had never crossed their path in the posh St. Mungo’s housing where they lived. He blamed the wizarding world for enabling his antisocial tendencies. With a floo inside most apartment units and apparition at one’s fingertips, who needed to linger in a hallway?"

  Underneath Your Clothes by Ladderofyears / @clemandben​ (FIC) Harry Potter/Scorpius Malfoy

Senses: Sight

When Scorpius wears a pair of very small, very lacy and very revealing pair of purple satin knickers to work, Head Auror Harry Potter is driven to near distraction.

  Pottering with Potter by keyflight790 / @keyflight790​ (FIC) Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter

Senses: Hearing

Harry doesn't know why he has a wireless show either, but he's going to make the best of it.

  Here’s To You by Drarrymadhatter / @drarrymadhatterstuff (FIC) Draco Malfoy/Harry 

Senses: Sight and Taste

Harry’s in a muggle bar drinking to Sirius’ honour on what would have been his birthday. Draco comes into the bar after a horrific blind date in need of a strong drink. Together they take on the cocktail menu and experiment with taste and sight.

  Crimson Neon by xanthippe74 / @xanthippe74​ (FIC) Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter

Senses: Smell

Winter, 1999. Harry thought going to New York would help him get his head on straight, but all he has to show for it are sore feet and a fridge full of takeaway containers. And now he’s homesick on top of everything else. It doesn’t help that his mysterious neighbour in 2C keeps cooking dishes that remind Harry of home and all the people he lost or left behind.

The familiar face behind the door of 2C is only the first surprise. As the bleak winter eases into spring, Harry discovers that happiness isn’t as out of reach as he thought… as long as he can find a way to hold onto it.

  sandalwood and gardenias by secondbutton / @kissingturians (FIC) Draco Malfoy/Hermione Granger

Senses: Smell

A balanced fragrance of sandalwood and something musky and earthy followed him like a shroud. Draco Malfoy smelled like a magical forest’s best kept secret. Like the moment following a storm when the sun peeks back over the clouds and living beings stop what they’re doing and pause to marvel at being able to roam outside again. It was a crisp top note with more robust undertones, and just a hint of sweetness. She thought she might love the scent if it lived on anyone else other than him.

  another heart whispers back by slytherco / @slytherco (FIC & ART) Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter

Senses: Taste, touch, smell, sight, hearing

At twenty-five, Harry Potter is still a virgin and sorely lacking in options to change that state anytime soon. To help him find a plus one for Ron and Hermione’s wedding, and maybe kill two birds with one stone, Harry’s friends set him up on a series of blind dates. The only problem is, there’s something not quite right with each of their candidates.

“Every heart sings a song, incomplete, until another heart whispers back. Those who wish to sing always find a song. At the touch of a lover, everyone becomes a poet.” ― Plato

In which Harry learns that some things are worth waiting for, that looking and seeing are two very different things, and that his heart’s song has been heard a long time ago.

[flutteringphalanges]

                                  Caught in a Riptide

Summary: After the infamous Count Dracula is discovered and taken into custody by the Jonathan Harker Foundation, former nun and now guardian to her young niece, Zoe, Agatha Van Helsing is tasked with keeping tabs on the vampire after a mishap leads to his release into modern day society. Can Agatha remain levelheaded, or will fate turn her onto a new path?

Pairing: Dracula/Agatha Van Helsing

Rated: M

Read on FFN and AO3

A/N: Alright, my dear readers, as promised! Thank you so much for your support as usual! Feedback is greatly loved and appreciated whether it be comments/kudos/reblogs/etc... I adore hearing your thoughts! Anyway, onward to chapter four!

                                             Chapter Four

Hawkins and Wentworth Law Firm. Established in the late 1800's, representing Count Dracula since September 12, 1896. A partnership that led to the purchase of some property for the vampire along with an arrangement for his resettlement. The vampire had thought of everything. For well over a century, the man had continuous tricks up his sleeve and today the Foundation had served as his willing assistant. That damn tablet. Whoever gave it to him in the first place should be fired on the spot.

"So you see, by holding him here, you are encroaching on Count Dracula's rights."

Frank Renfield was a rather scrawny man. Nervous, the epitome of someone walking on eggshells. His outfit was rather washed out, almost a little too baggy to fit his body properly. Agatha lost count of how many times he pushed his glasses back up to the brim of his nose. He certainly wasn't the ideal lawyer she would've pictured, but she reluctantly gave him credit for how prepared he was.

"He's a murderer!" She tried to argue, gesturing at Dracula who merely grinned in response. "You do realize what he is?!"

"Oh yes, of course!" Frank nodded vigorously, clearing his throat. "But my point stands. He is being held against his will and if he isn't released by tonight, my client is willing to take legal actions. And," the lawyer gave an awkward smile. "I'm not sure if all of England is ready to learn that a vampire is among the population."

"In other words, we're supposed to set him free and just trust that his actions remain civil?" Bloxham countered, folding her arms. "I think not."

"Actually, we did speak on that over Skype." The attorney responded looking over to the vampire as he spoke. "Based on Dracula's prior cases, there is a deal we are willing to make with you. A compromise if you will."

"What makes you think you have the upper hand in deciding this?!" The scientist frowned, eyes fixated on Frank's. "Why do you get to make the decisions?"

"No matter how you look at it, Dr. Bloxham, Count Dracula will be freed tonight." Renfield said firmly, pushing his glasses up again. "We thought it only fair to make some sort of offer to appease the Foundation. Are you interested in listening?" Neither of the women interjected so he continued. "Count Dracula will be freed but he is more than happy to be occasionally checked in on. Think of it as a parole of sorts."

"He's willing for someone to keep tabs on him? Agatha questioned, finally reentering into the conversation. "What's the catch?"

"There is no catch, I assure you," the lawyer explained. "Well...it's interesting actually." His nervous chuckle didn't settle well with the former nun. "He'll agree to these terms IF you are the one to supervise him."

It only happened every so often, but Agatha Van Helsing found herself at a loss for words. She stared dumbfounded at the lawyer who sheepishly smiled through thin lips. There was no arguing. No chance of being heard. Before she could even utter a single word in, Bloxham answered for her.

"Agatha would be more than happy to accept those terms."

Bloxham stared at her as if almost daring her to say otherwise. Frank beamed, opening up his briefcase. "Brilliant!" He expressed, looking from one woman to the other. "Now that we are all on the same track, if we could just fill out some documents. Just some formalities really. You know, just because this is a legal case and we like to keep records on file."

As the scientist led the lawyer away, Agatha finally turned to meet Dracula's gaze. He was smirking at her, obviously delighted by it all. A part of her wanted to race over and open the ceiling, but somehow she refrained despite how marvelous it sounded. He had played her like a fiddle and he knew it. Oh if she could just stake him in the heart...what a satisfying thought.

"I'd like to think of this as a beautiful start to our friendship," Dracula commented. "I had a feeling the Harker Foundation would be breathing down my back because of this, but what better way to soothe this fine institution's concerns than to allow you to be my figurative probation officer?"

"Just because you like to assume that you're very clever doesn't mean you are all that you give yourself credit for." Agatha countered, folding her arms over her chest. "I'm not playing into your game, Count Dracula."

"Oh, but I think that you already are." And his low tone sent a shiver up her spine. "I know your kind, Agatha Van Helsing. And I may not know you fully yet, but I will. I have my ways. And when I do…" His smirk broadened. "I expect we'll be sharing quite the exhilarating experience."

"Go to Hell." It was the best insult that came into her mind at the time.

"My chariot is a two seater," the Count replied. "I'll make sure to keep a spot open for you."

                                                        XXX

"Eugene says his big brother said that if you make a face long enough, it'll get stuck like that!" Zoe informed her aunt as she kicked her legs, sending her higher on the swing set. "Why do you look so grumpy?"

Agatha looked up from the book she was attempting to read on the bench. After picking Zoe up from school, she took the little girl to the park. At least there maybe she could clear her head. Setting the novel down in her lap, she looked towards the orange horizon. The sun was beginning to set. Only a few hours now.

"First, Eugene's brother is wrong. Faces don't get stuck," she stated. "And I'm not grumpy, I just had a hard day at work. I'm a little tired, that's all."

"Oh." And Zoe fell silent for a moment, still pumping her legs hard. She was flying so high, Agatha was beginning to grow concern about the chains breaking. "Was Dracula there? Did you talk to him?" The woman visibly stiffened at the name but the girl didn't seem to notice. "I told my friends I met a real vampire, but they didn't believe me. Evan said I was a liar. But I'm not lying, am I?"

Thank God Zoe was only seven with a wild imagination. No one took kids really seriously at that age. Still, perhaps it wasn't good for her to mention him. Quite frankly, she didn't even want to hear his name right now. Grabbing her book, she stood up. It was getting late anyway.

"Let's not talk about him anymore, Zoe." Agatha replied. "How about we finish up here and get some ice cream, hm? I'm in the mood for some." It wasn't exactly the truth, but she knew how to quickly change her niece's train of thought. "What do you say?"

"Two scoops?!" The girl asked with excitement, leaping off the swing.

"One, and you can get it with sprinkles." Agatha said, reaching to take a hold of the little girl's hand. "I think both need it after today." Though a tall glass of something alcohol sounded more appealing. "Let's go."

It wasn't a long drive to the parlor and after getting their cones, they were back on the road. Through the rear view mirror, Agatha watched in dismay as vanilla ice cream dribbled down Zoe's coated mouth onto her shirt and seat belt. Perhaps she should've grabbed a handful of napkins when she had the chance.

"Can we watch a movie tonight?" The little girl asked in between licks. "I promise I'll go to bed right afterwards!"

Well, considering she was already hyped up on sugar, getting her to sleep now would be near impossible. Agatha looked through the mirror again and towards the sky. Nearly dark. His freedom was drawing nearer. Trying not to think about it, she gave into Zoe's demand.

"We can watch a movie," she agreed. "But then you have to go to sleep without arguing."

"Yes, ma'am!" Zoe exclaimed, giving her aunt a salute. "I promise!"

Agatha made a point of locking the door as she and a very sticky Zoe entered the house. As her niece went to wash up, the former nun retrieved her phone from her purse. She hadn't exactly discussed what had happened with Jack. When their lunch was interrupted earlier, Bloxham seemed more concerned with her than the doctor. Dialing his number, she held the device to her ear. It immediately went to voicemail. Frowning, she set it down. She'd try again later when Zoe was asleep.

"All clean!" The little girl called out causing Agatha to snap back into reality. "And in my jammies! C'mon, Aunt Aggie, let's watch something…" She seemed to think about it. "How about something spooky?!"

"How about something that doesn't give you nightmares?" Her aunt chuckled, moving over to sit beside the little girl. "How about one of those princess movies you like?"

"Princesses are boring." Zoe exclaimed, rolling her eyes.

"But you love princesses," Agatha said with a small frown. "You wanted one for your birthday this year."

"I like vampires now." The young girl proclaimed.

Her aunt was about to interject when the sound of her doorbell going off stopped her. Furrowing her brow, Agatha rose from the couch and made her way towards the door. Was it Jack? An odd hour to be making a house call. As she turned the knob to open it, she immediately regretted her decision. For there, standing nonchalantly in front of her was none other than the Devil himself. Count Dracula.

Speechless. Completely, utterly dumbfounded. She must've looked ridiculous, standing there gawking at the man she'd seen locked up only hours before. Agatha's mouth was so dry that even if she wanted to say something, she couldn't. Silence.

"Well? You know how this works, don't you?" The moonlight glinted off of Dracula's smile as he stood at Agatha's doorstep patiently. "Are you going to invite me in?"

So many questions. An entire novel's worth. She began to rifle through them, trying to decide which of the several were the most important to bring up first. Agatha blocked the doorway, her eyes narrowing as she stared daggers at the vampire.

"How the Hell did you find my house?!" It seemed like a logical inquiry all things considered.

"Googled it." He shrugged, looking as if he was very proud of himself. "You'd be surprised by the lack of Van Helsings in the area. Oh." He held up one finger before shoving a hand into his pocket. "And this helped too." It was Jack's phone.

"You..." Agatha stumbled, struggling between insulting or going off completely. "You stole Jack's phone and then decided it was okay to stalk me to my home?!" "I didn't stalk you." The vampire corrected. "I merely followed your address." He inhaled, still seeming unfazed by Agatha's aggravation. "Are you going to let me in?" "I..." She began before the sound of small feet came bounding in her direction. Zoe. Christ.

"Aunt Aggie!" The girl chirped. "You gotta put a movie in! You're..." Her blue eyes widen at the sight of Dracula. "Mr. Dracula!"

"Zoe, go to your room." Agatha said coolly, trying to block the little girl's view. "Dracula was just leaving-"

"Wanna come in and watch the movie with us?!"

Agatha was unsure whether to face palm, cry out in frustration, or just go dig a hole and bury herself in it as Dracula grinned widely and stepped into her home. All thanks to Zoe's innocent invitation inside. How thoughtful.

"Thank you for the generous offer, Zoe." Dracula said kneeling down to the girl's eye level. "But I'm here to actually talk to your Aunt Aggie."

Agatha swept in front of the two glowering at the vampire as he straightened up. Zoe peered from behind her aunt, looking curiously at the towering Count. His expression, still friendly, was no longer focused on her, but now met her aunt's gaze.

"Get out," Agatha growled. "I rescind your invitation."

"Ah, as much as I'm sure you'd like that, it doesn't work that way." His smile turned into a smirk as he leaned against the wall. "You see, it was dear Zoe who invited me in. Not you. And while this is your house, she lives here too. So unless your niece wants me to leave, I think I'll stay for a bit." His eyes flickered down to the little girl again. "Can I stay, Zoe?"

"Zoe," Agatha said through her teeth. "Tell him to leave. Now."

"How about a little incentive. Say...five pounds?" Dracula whipped the money from his pocket and dangled it in front of her like a dog. "It's yours if I can stay."

The little girl smiled and, without a word, snatched the money and hurried off to put it in her piggy bank. Dracula grinned, delighted by his accomplishment as he turned back to face an enraged Agatha. What a cheat. The woman's arms folded tightly over her chest as she watched with fury as he made his way over to the kitchen table.

"You're a real prick." She hissed as he sat down. "You have no right to even talk to her-or bribe her for that matter! She's seven!"

"She's smart," Dracula sighed contentedly, leaning back. "Won't you join me? Take a seat, Agatha, I merely came here to talk." He laced his fingers together, hands resting on the table. "We've both had quite a day today, haven't we?"

Agatha didn't sit down. Instead, she just stared at him. Hard. As if maybe, if she concentrated hard enough, he'd just poof away. Or explode. That would've been better. He, of course, waited patiently for her reply and soon the former nun realized that, unless she addressed him, he wouldn't be leaving any time soon.

"Why are you here?" It was a repetitive question and she knew it.

"To talk," he replied. "You practically stormed out the moment my dear lawyer and that boss of yours discussed everything over with you. You can be quite difficult, I'm learning. But we can work on that," he smiled. "Could I trouble you for a piece of paper and a pen?"

"Why?" Agatha asked curtly.

"So I can write down my address for you," the Count rolled his eyes. "Goodness, Agatha, for a Van Helsing, I thought you would be more dedicated in wanting to locate me. Do you know how hard your grandfather tried? I am literally giving you directions to my home. You should be more appreciative."

Offering his address. Such a cordial act. What his motive was behind it, she wasn't sure. But Agatha remembered Bloxham's request-or rather, mandatory instructions, and she begrudgingly got what he asked for. Tossing them roughly onto the table, the former nun watched as he scribbled his information down in a surprising elegant font.

"I included my number as well." Dracula exclaimed, holding the paper out to her. "Go on, take it. I don't bite." And there was a glint of mischievousness in his eyes as he spoke the last bit. "I hope you don't mind, but I took the liberty of copying down your own cell number from your friend's phone." With that, he neatly slid Jack's device across the table. "Apologize to him, will you? I'm sure he's frantically looking for it."

Agatha immediately snatched it up and shoved it into her pocket. Hopefully he hadn't tampered with it to the point of it being useless. As for the paper, she hesitantly took it, eyes studying the words scrawled across. Almost instantly she recognized the street. Even the name of the complex. Nostrils flared, she gazed up at the Count wide eyed.

"There must be some mistake." She snapped, looking from him back down to the paper. "This is only a few blocks from where I live!"

"It seemed only appropriate seeing as you are supposed to be keeping an eye on me." Dracula said in a hair tearingly calm voice. "It was an added bonus that it sits at the perfect location. How coincidences can be rather humorous." He continued to smile, the same look that had yet to leave his face. "You should come by some time. Perhaps for dinner?"

If she was to kill him now, right on the spot, would anyone really mind? Jack certainly wouldn't tell. Bloxham might be rather annoyed, but all things considered, she could kiss Agatha's ass. Then there was his lawyer-Frank. She could figure something out. But then deep down, way deep down at this point, the Van Helsing side of her wanted to learn more. Desired to know more. And by destroying the vampire where he currently stood would take away from that.

"I prefer not to partake in the slaughtering of innocent human life." The woman replied coldly. "And I intend to make sure you do the same." For a brief moment, the amusement faltered from Dracula's face. "You're in the modern world, Count Dracula. Drinking people dry is frowned upon by society. I assure you, whatever it takes, your last victim will have been in 1897. I swear upon my great, great grandfather's name."

"He's dead," the vampire said with a cocked eyebrow. "I believe you are supposed to swear on the live's of the living…say that darling Zoe of yours?"

He struck a major pressure point and Dracula very well knew it. Agatha's gaze darkened and she leaned dangerous close to his face. If he wanted, the Count could've easily snapped her neck within a second. Instead, he merely eyed her with curiosity.

"If you ever lay one of your clawed fingers on a single hair on her head, I will destroy you where you stand." Agatha hissed with such ferocity even she was a little taken aback. "Don't threaten my child."

"I have no intention to," Dracula said, holding up a hand. "But your aggressive protectiveness is a rather charming quality if I do say so myself."

"As charming as a crucifix burned into your bare flesh," she shot back.

"Kinky," Dracula chuckled. "My, you are quite an anomaly, Agatha Van Helsing."

"What's kinky?"

Both adults turned to see Zoe standing there eyeing them with great interest. Her head was tilted ever so slightly and in her arms she hugged one of her stuffed animals. Jesus Christ, not again. He'd been awake for a day. ONE day. And he already was corrupting her niece's mind with such vulgar language.

"Nothing." She said, eyes locked on Dracula's as she spoke. "And I don't want to hear you repeating it."

"Oh, a bad word." Zoe nodded thoughtfully. "Are we going to watch a movie now?"

"Actually," Dracula began as he stood up. "I suppose I should be leaving now. It's getting rather late-or, I should say, becoming too close to early for my comfort." He strode towards the door as Agatha remained at the table, Zoe by her side. "I'll be seeing you soon, Agatha." He grinned, his eyes flickering down to the little girl. "And thank you for inviting me in, Zoe. I much appreciated that."

Agatha said nothing as the vampire opened the door and slipped outside. After she was sure he was gone, she hurried over and locked the dead bolt. Running a hand through her hair, she let out a long, hard exhale. Zoe walked over to her, an ever present happy expression on her young face.

"I like him!" She stated cheerfully.

That only made one of them.

[verus-veritas]

Interactive: The Great Shift (2)

The cop's gun dropped from his hand as he looked around in shock.

"Oh no!" He cried. "Where am I now?"

I looked down at myself and let out a great sigh of relief. I was still in the body that once I could have only dreamed of having.

"Who are you?" the new cop asked.

"I'm Tony Coletta." I said with a smile. "But you don't need to worry about that. Who are you?"

The cop looked down at his badge and said. "Well I guess I'm Officer Reynolds now."

I smiled again. It looked like I had found an ally who would come in handy if or when Tony came looking for his body. A cop would be hard to argue with.

"If you need somewhere to stay I've got plenty of room at my place." I said.

The cop instantly climbed into the passenger seat and I started the engine. As I drove I watched the new Officer Reynolds check himself out in the wing mirror.

"Very nice..." he murmured. "I can live with this."

Officer Reynolds was a big man, but in all the right places. He had broad shoulders, muscular arms and a face that said, 'Don't mess with me'.

I watched him pull a wallet from his pocket and flick through his I.D.

"Kieron Reynolds", he said over and over again before putting it away. He turned to look at me.

"So you're really you then" he asked a little suspiciously..

"Yes," I lied with determination in my voice. "Why?"

"You're a lucky guy", Kieron continued. "It’s happened twice and you've escaped it both times?."

"Weird shit like this doesn't happen to me", I said with a smirk. "I thought everyone was playing some kind of stupid prank on me at first."

"Nope," Kieron said holding up his hands and studied them. "It happened alright."

As we pulled up outside the house Kieron let out a slow whistle.

"Nice!" he said. "You've done alright for yourself here."

"It's my house." I snarled at his remark.

"Yes, yes of course", Kieron said as he followed me inside. I began to wonder whether bringing 'Kieron' home with me had been the right thing to do. Was he going to mess up my plans of taking over Tony's life for good? I stopped to look at my new face in the hallway mirror. No-one was going to take it away from me now, not even Tony himself!

"So who were you originally?" I asked Kieron as I handed him some chicken from the fridge.

He let out a laugh and almost choked on the food.

"An ex-con down on my luck. Shitty apartment, slut of a girlfriend," he said. "Now look at me! I'm the fucking long arm of the law. Thank you very much Officer Reynolds!"

"What about the real Officer Reynolds?" I asked.

"Fuck him," he said. "Hopefully he’s permanently out of the picture. If not I'll arrest him for impersonating a police officer." He laughed long and hard at his own joke.

"Anyway Tony," he said and I realized I liked being called that. "I need to take a shower now. Get to know the new me properly, if you catch my drift." he winked at me before I guided him upstairs.

I found him a guest room with en-suite and left him to it. As I closed the door he was already half undressed and grinning like a cheshire cat. I dreaded to think what he was going to get up to in the shower.

I went to Tony's, I mean my room and closed the door. Picking up a photo album on the desk, I flicked through it while studying every picture of Tony so as to learn as much as I could about him. I let Tony's face smile smugly as I acknowledged that these were now pictures of me, the hottest jock in town! My eyes wandered to a porn magazine I had seen earlier and I soon felt a stiffening in my jeans. Removing my shirt and revealing my muscular body, I picked up the magazine and was about to take off my jeans when the doorbell suddenly rang again. I cautiously made my way downstairs while repressing my raging erection and opened the door to see Phoebe, our school’s head cheerleader.

"Tony? Is that you?" Phoebe asked.

"Who else do you think it is?" I said in character. "Ain’t no one getting their hands on my body."

"Thank god," she said. "Can I come in?"

I watched her walk into the house. She was hot. Dark-skinned and petite in a Camila Cabello sort of way. Tony's hormone were rushing through my body. I knew what I wanted.

"Is that really you then Phoebe?" I asked.

"Yes," she said with a smile. "What happened to everyone?"

"I don't know," I said wrapping my big arms around her and smelling her hair. "But at least we're still ourselves."

"Yeah..." she said holding me tight. I felt myself start to stiffen but she only pushed tighter and it was pressed hard against her.

"Let’s go upstairs." she whispered and led the way. She obviously knew where Tony's bedroom was.

I lost my virginity as Tony Coletta. I couldn't have wished it to be any better. Me in control of his great body and with the Head Cheerleader as well. I lay back feeling the blood pumping through my veins. I felt more alive than I had ever been.

"Tony," Phoebe said. "You were amazing."

"Well I am Tony Coletta," I said with a smirk. "What did you expect?"

She let out a little giggle.

I lay on the bed and watched her go the bathroom to shower. I looked down at my penis and flopped it about in my hand. I smiled knowing that I was going to have so much more fun with it. That is if the real Tony didn't turn up... But even if he did, there’s no way I would let him take all this back. I was Tony Coletta now!

I went downstairs to find Kieron watching the television dressed only in his boxers. He was studying a tattoo on one of his big arms.

"Had a little action then," he said. "Could hear you both down here."

"Yeah, so what if I did?" I answered him with a snark.

"Nothing wrong with that," he said shaking his head. "Good-looking guy like you must get a lot of girls after you. Mind you I think the same is gonna apply to me now." He let a sneer cross his new face which seemed out of place. Suddenly Phoebe walked into the room.

"Oh I didn't know you had company." she said shyly.

 "Hi, I'm Kieron, a friend of the family." Kieron stood up to greet her, shaking her hand.

"Shhhh!" I said as a news report flashed up on the tv screen.

"Scientists have finally discovered a way to return those affected by the recent events to their own bodies. By capturing energy from the recent aftershocks Professor Ian George of the Torchwood Institute has created a device that will attach itself to the residual energy in a person’s body and transfer it to another. It will be a lengthy process but it looks as though things will soon be back to normal," the reporter said from inside the body of a stunning blonde. "And I for one will be looking forward to getting back to my daily weight lifting sessions. This is Bill Masters for CBS news."

There was a moment silence.

"Well that’s good then isn’t it?" Phoebe asked.

"Oh yes, great news." I said.

"Yes, couldn't agree more", Kieron said.

Then there was another moment of silence. Suddenly, my mobile started to ring. I picked it up hesitantly. Someone was trying to contact Tony and I had a pretty sure idea of who it was...

"Have you heard the news?" a strange voice said, but I knew it was none other than the real Tony.

"Sure. Good news alright." I said while trying to hide my dissatisfaction.

"Oh yes, the best news I've heard today! So, are you ready to go?" Tony said obviously unable to hide his excitement.

"Where to?" I played dumb.

"The Torchwood Institute, of course. I think I’m in the body of a wanted criminal, so I want to get out of it as soon as possible." Tony said hastily.

"Uh... okay. Just come here first so we can pick up some stuff, and we’ll go there together." I answered him. He simply agreed and then hung up. Sitting back on the sofa I started to think. If everyone already believed I was the real Tony, there was no need for me to give this body away! I just had to get rid of the real Tony and then I could stay as Tony Coletta forever! And that’s when I knew exactly what had to be done.

"What a weird guy!" I exclaimed loudly to attract Phoebe and Kieron's attention.

"Is everything all right?" they asked in unison.

I then told them about a bad guy who claimed to be me, and demanded I give my body to him. I also lied and said that he threatened to kill me after he got my body.

"What a horrible thing to do! To pretend to be someone else just so he could steal someone’s identity, who could do something like that?" Phoebe shook her head in disbelief.

"Don't worry about that, my friend. Since I’m a police officer now, it’s my responsibility to protect innocent people like you." Kieron reassured me. I simply nodded at him before we all gave each other a knowing look.

When the real Tony entered the mansion, Phoebe, Kieron and I was hiding behind the door. Before he could react we jumped on him and knocked him out.

"I recognize this guy. He was the most dangerous serial murderer in the city," Kieron said. “Thank god he never got the chance to switch with anyone.”

Taking the unconscious Tony to the police station, now in the body of the most wanted criminal, the police were incredibly satisfied with our work and gave us a great reward. As for the real Tony, he tried to explain the situation he was in but nobody believed him. After all, it was three people’s words against one. He was eventually sentenced to death and the execution was held on the same day. Removing one more dirt from the planet.

---

Eventually everything went back to normal, everyone was supposedly sent back into their original bodies, but with a few people missing. One of them was the outcast Evan who’s mind was never found. His parents were miserable, but they got over it soon when the government compensated them for the loss. The students also noticed a few changes in the school jock, Tony Coletta. It seemed as if he had become friendlier, more intelligent and mature. He was also often seen hanging out with the police officer Kieron or went out on long steamy dates with Phoebe. But it’s not like it mattered. Tony was the perfect guy before, and after The Great Shift he still was. It seems as if some people are lucky enough to be completely unaffected by The Great Shift, and Tony Coletta was definitely one of them.

The End

Source: “The Great Shift” Interactive Story on Writing.com

[moviemunchies]

Rian Johnson became a famous director when he directed 2017’s controversial The Last Jedi, known for its deconstructionist take on the Star Wars mythos. Some people loved it! Some people didn’t. But if nothing else his take on the story was bold. The movie played with your expectations in ways rarely seen in Star Wars, and it was clear that Johnson wanted to do something different and create a memorable filmgoing experience.

And then a couple of years later, he unveiled his newest project: a film called Knives Out. When the trailer hit the Internet, the movie looked spectacular: a fun and stylish mystery movie, filled with big name actors and awesome set design. It seemed like it would be a promising original film that we’d be talking about for years to come.

Having now seen the movie, I can tell you that these impressions are completely accurate.

Our story goes like this: Harlan Thrombey, a world-renowned best-selling murder mystery novelist, is found dead from an apparent suicide, having cut his own throat in the middle of the night after his eighty-fifth birthday party, which his entire family attended. However, the family is all called back to the house for further investigation by famous private detective Benoit Blanc, who was hired by an anonymous client to look into Harlan’s death. What follows is a lively and fast-paced whodunit (or is it?) as Blanc does his darndest to uncover the family’s secrets and discover what really happened the night that Harlan Thrombey.

Whether or not you liked The Last Jedi, it was a memorable movie in that it contained an awful lot of plot twists. Rian Johnson puts that obsession to good use in the genre that it fits in perfectly: the murder mystery. While ultimately it follow the general shape of a classical murder mystery in the style of an Agatha Christie story, including the detective explaining everything at the end. But the road getting there? It’s a winding thing that will surprise you. Maybe the plot twists won’t surprise you, but the way in which they’re revealed will. Things that feel like they should be revealed in the last third of the film are spilled in the first, only for everything to connect in a slightly different way (or does it?).

Making the movie unique even more than its Plot is its fantastic cast; just about every performer here is bringing his or her A-game to this project. Some highlights: Daniel Craig plays our detective, Benoit Blanc, as a true southern gentleman, albeit one who is, in the tradition of memorable fictional sleuths, a bit different in his approach to thinking. He very easily could have been annoying, but Craig makes him lovable. Christopher Plummer does fantastically as Harlan Thrombey, the body; that sounds lame, but there are several flashbacks of him while he’s alive and he’s able to convey a likable, if a bit aloof figure that loves his family even if he doesn’t always see eye-to-eye with them. He’s not just a sweet old man or a grumpy one; he’s a fully-developed something-in-between old man. Ana de Armas plays Marta Cabrera, Harlan’s good-natured nurse that finds herself in over her head in how the scenario has evolved. Again, her character could easily have been pigeon-holed as a stereotype, and though she does fill certain parts of the ‘Good Immigrant’ cliche, she’s still an endearing enough character to the audience (or is she?). 

Jamie Lee Curtis stands out as Linda, Harlan’s oldest daughter and the strongest-willed of the bunch. She’s never likable, exactly (and she’s not meant to be), but of the family she stands out as having a stern and memorable character that’s fun to watch. Her husband Richard is played by Don Johnson as the kind of guy you kind of want to sock in the face, which is the point, as a full-of-himself man who clearly has no idea what’s going on (or does he?). Their son Ransom is played by Chris Evans, going against type as a complete and utter foul-mouthed smarmy douchebag (or is he?) that displays the family’s dysfunction in full force.

Then there’s Joni, played by Toni Collette, the lifestyle guru who’s Harlan’s widowed daughter-in-law. She’s fun, self-centered and a bit out-of-touch with the rest of the family, not as close to them as she thinks she is, even if she is trying (or is she?). Her daughter Meg, played by Katherine Langford, is the progressive activist who always wants to do the right thing (or does she?).

The next thing that makes this movie stick in your head: its setting. A good chunk of this movie takes place in Harlan Thrombey’s house, a massive manor on its own full to the brim with books, sculptures, souvenirs, and of course, knives. One of the detectives even likens it to a Clue board. Every shot within the house clearly establishes the mood as a fun mystery movie that knows exactly the sort of story it’s telling and how to play with the audience’s expectations.

If there’s one weakness I think this movie has though, it’s that some of its cast feels a bit underused. I’ve read that there are deleted scenes featuring more of Walt, played excellently by Michael Shannon, and his wife and child, but ultimately they didn’t add much to the Plot and were cut. Walt himself stands out quite a bit with a few memorable scenes, but his family? Not so much. So these characters feel a bit like there should be more to them, and yet there isn’t. The movie already has a lot going on, so I understand why that material was cut, but it feels a bit off in a film so good at utilizing its resources in other respects.

So see Knives Out! If you love a good mystery movie, I think this will satisfy your hunger. If that’s not your usual fare, this might whet your appetite to it a little. It’s a great, quotable movie with a lovely cast and an amazing story.

[laconservancy]

Our Favorite Movies, Starring Los Angeles!

This list was compiled by the L.A. Conservancy’s Last Remaining Seats Committee—the volunteers who select the LRS lineup each year, and help produce the film series. Rest assured, they know their movies—as well as their classic L.A. architecture! If you’re pining to visit the places that make our city special, consider watching one of these classic L.A. stories—and enjoy seeing them on the small screen, instead.

Clueless (1995)

Streaming: N/A

“This was such a great coming of age movie that it took me years to realize it was an adaptation of Jane Austen’s “Emma.”  One of my favorite scenes is when Cher is being robbed at the Circus Liquor store, on a bad day I like to drive to that location and quote “You don’t understand. This is an Alaia… It’s like a totally important designer.” -Helen 

Double Indemnity (1944) 

Streaming: Hulu 

Los Angeles locations plus a great Film Noir story.  You can’t go wrong with a movie that has lines like “How could I have known that murder can sometimes smell like honeysuckle.” -Scott 

La La Land (2016) 

Streaming: YouTube

Not a historic movie, but is there any film that better captures the beauty of living in the city of angels? A musical with songs that will keep you cheery while sitting in traffic, La La Land is peak modern Los Angeles. -Sam 

Bosch (2014 - Present)

Streaming: Netflix

Michael Connelly's LAPD homicide detective, Harry Bosch, travels all over L.A. There is enough detail (in the books) to follow his travels. He lives on Woodrow Wilson just off Mulholland. He eats at Chinese Kitchen, Nickel Diner, Musso and Franks, Pacific Dining Car, etc. -Paul 

“M” (1951) 

Streaming: N/A, but on DVD on Amazon 

Great shots of 1951 Bunker Hill before it was redeveloped, plus, this is a great atmospheric Film Noir. -Celeste 

Devil In A Blue Dress (1995)

 Streaming: Amazon Prime Video, and also on STARZ 

Noir Los Angeles in the 1950s, but from an African American perspective. 

-Celeste 

Once Upon a Time in Hollywood (2019)

Streaming: Amazon Prime 

I know it isn’t an older film though it completely changed the meaning of “once upon a time” for us… -Caroline 

Kiss Me Deadly (1955)

Steaming: N/A 

“Kiss Me Deadly” is one of my top ten movies.  It also features some scenes with great footage of Bunker Hill and Angel’s Flight going up and down.  Later, the world seems to come to end, but not without a lot of tough guys talking wise first and dames manipulating them behind their backs. -Tom Dailey 

Inherent Vice (2014) 

Streaming: Amazon Prime

One of my favorite recent discoveries!  It stars Joaquin Phoenix, Josh Brolin, and a pre-Fantastic Beasts Katherine Waterston. It features so many great L.A. locations. Director Paul Thomas Anderson loves LA and it comes through on film. -Traci 

The  Exiles (1961)

Streaming: N/A 

Depicts transplanted American Indians from SW reservations, living in the Bunker Hill area of Los Angeles during the late 1950's. Directed by Kent MacKenzie, a USC film student, it was lost for 50 years and rediscovered by Director Thom Anderson in his movie "Los Angeles Plays Itself". It is important to me because of my Native American roots. -Elizabeth Night 

Nightcrawler (2014)

Streaming: Amazon, Google Play, ITunes, VUDU 

Lou Bloom (Jake Gyllenhaal), a driven young man desperate for work, discovers the high-speed world of L.A. crime journalism. Finding a group of freelance camera crews who film crashes, fires, murder and other mayhem.  -Tracy Jackson

The Neon Demon (2016) 

Streaming: Google Play, YouTube 

Jesse (Elle Fanning) moves to Los Angeles just after her 16th birthday to launch a career as a model. The head of her agency tells the innocent teen that she has the qualities to become a top star. Jesse soon faces the wrath of ruthless vixens who despise her fresh-faced beauty. On top of that, she must contend with a seedy motel manager and a creepy photographer. As Jesse starts to take the fashion world by storm, her personality changes in ways that could help her against her cutthroat rivals. I love this film because it’s very weird but beautifully shot. It’s a slow-building thriller that shows LA in a creepy, neon light! -Megan Bennett 

The Big Sleep (1946) 

Streaming: Available to rent on Amazon Prime, Google Play, YouTube

P.I. Philip Marlowe (Humphrey Bogart) is hired by a wealthy general to discover who is blackmailing his daughter over gambling debts and stop them. Marlowe finds himself deep within a web of love triangles, blackmail, murder, gambling, and organized crime, not to mention falling in love with the general’s other daughter, Vivian (Lauren Bacall). Marlowe goes all over L.A. looking for clues, including the Hollywood Public Library and up into the Hollywood Hills. Author Raymond Chandler was rumored to have based the General’s home on the Greystone Mansion. This film is one of my favorites because it has the best dialogue I’ve ever heard in a film. The one-liners and quick exchanges are awesome, and every scene with Bogie and Bacall is exquisite. - Liz Highstrete 

Chinatown (1974) 

Streaming: Amazon Prime, Hulu, iTunes, Google Play

I know this title is radioactive due to its connection with Polanski.  But, as the recent book by Sam Wesson, The Big Goodbye, points out, Chinatown was a significant collaboration of many creative forces, including Robert Towne, Jack Nicholson, Robert Evans, Faye Dunaway, John Huston, Diane Ladd, John Alonzo, Richard Sybert, and others.  Their work can still be admired.  Plus, there are scenes shot on location throughout L.A. city and county. https://la.curbed.com/maps/chinatown-filming-location-map -Tom

L. A. Confidential (1997)

Streaming:  Netflix 

L.A. Confidential is a 1950’s Hollywood crime drama of corrupt cops and mobster bad-guys filmed at historic locations across Los Angeles.  In particular, the movie showcases Richard Neutra’s “Lovell Health House” on Dundee Road in Los Feliz as the supposed home of the local pimp, who runs a prostitution ring of women who have taken on the appearances of famous movie stars.  Kim Basinger stars as Veronica Lake look-alike.  Russell Crowe, Kevin Spacey and Guy Pearce star as three very different cops.  Danny DeVito writes the local tabloid news. Originally built and named for a health-and-fitness guru, the Lovell Health House has just been put on the market, according to Curbed Los Angeles, and the current owner “wants to find a buyer who will appreciate the home’s architecture—and either preserve it or restore it”.  Any takers? -Leslie

[planetsam]

Love your writing! Prompt/ask: Isabel & Alex friendship development post finale -- they'll both be processing a lot & maybe looking for a confidant who gets it. & I'd love to see their types of humor together!

Alex almost backs out.

Sharing his feelings isn’t his strong suit, especially not about this. He chooses a group a few towns over. He doesn’t need one that might get back to his dad. It’s an hour drive but he makes it and sits outside until it’s five minutes to starting. He forces himself to go in. He gets one of the paper cups of bad coffee and finds his seat among the handful of people. Most are women. He picked a coed group for a reason, one that focused on LGBTQ+. Which makes this even more difficult. But in for a penny, in for a pound and so he takes his seat as the person in charge comes in.

“Thank you all for coming,” she says, “being here is the first step so I commend you all. We have some new faces, would anyone like to share?”

They go around and share stories, stories that are familiar to Alex but he doesn’t feel more comforted by them. He feels like he doesn’t want to be here. Attention is slowly shifting to him and he’s prepared to just bolt. But then the door opens and everyone swings towards it. Alex stares too. Apparently his brilliant idea to go a few towns away was brilliant enough to have occurred to someone else. Standing in the doorway looking torn between fleeing and murdering someone is none other than Isobel Evans.

“Is this the abuse support group for LGBTQ+?” She asks.

“Yes,” the group leader says, “join us,” she motions her in.

Isobel crosses the room with quick precise steps. Alex feels like he’s about a foot tall. She doesn’t seem embarrassed or ashamed to be here and he wants the ground to open him up and swallow him whole. A flicker of surprise crosses her face when she looks at him, but she quickly pushes it away and deposits her purse next to her seat. When she clasps her hands together, Alex can see that her ring finger is bare.

“Would you like to share?” The leader offers.

Isobel pauses for a second but then she sets her face and looks directly at the woman.

“My name is Isobel,” she says, “I recently discovered my husband was grooming me since I was a teenager, married me and abused me the entire time,” she continues, “also I’m bisexual.”

He has no idea how she can say it like that.

Apparently neither does anyone else. Then again, Isobel is unique. God knows she was more popular in school than Max or Michael. And since school she’s the most successful every way you look at it. When she sets her mind to something, the world had better watch out. And it seems that she has set her mind to this. When the leader looks at him, Alex does his best to channel her before realizing that’s exactly what he doesn’t want to do. He has to be his own hero in this.

“I’m Alex,” he says, “my father was verbally and physically abusive to me because I was gay.”

The world doesn’t end when he says it aloud. It makes him slightly braver as he continues.

“I was blackmailed into going to war and I’m proud, to have served my country,” he says, “but I lost a lot,” he continues, “and I feel like when I look in the mirror, the only thing I see is him. I don’t know how to be myself.”

When he meets Isobel’s eyes, she gives him the saddest, most encouraging smile he’s ever gotten.

“I didn’t expect to see you here,” Isobel says.

“Great minds?” He offers as they get their paper cups of bad coffee during the break, “you got here fast. I couldn’t admit what happened for a long time.”

“Bull in a china shop,” she says with a shrug, “but I have to do this. I can’t be there for Michael while Max is—“ she shrugs.

Something cold slithers down Alex’s spine.

“While Max is what?” He asks.

Isobel’s perfect eyebrows draw together.

“Max is asleep,” she says, stressing the word so he knows she’s not talking about the natural kind, “did Michael not tell you?”

“I haven’t talked to him in weeks,” Alex says.

“What?!” Isobel bursts out. “Whose he spending all his time with?” Alex looks away, “oh.”

“Yeah,” he says.

He can’t be mad. Not after everything he’s put Michael through these past few years. He said that it was over so Michael found someone. Or acted on something that was already there. Alex knows he shouldn’t have left Michael behind. Just as equally, he knows that he did. Now he has to live with the consequences of it. Isobel looks devastated and even in the midst of what he feels, in the midst of trying to share, a part of him wants to shake the answers out of her.

“Let’s go back?”

“Yeah,” he says again.

They arrive separately for weeks.

Some days they talk, some days they don’t acknowledge the other past a quick nod. It’s mind blowing to hear Isobel talk though. She reworks everything seamlessly. He always chalked Michael’s hesitance to share up to his past. But Isobel reworks everything so that if he didn’t know the truth he would never have guessed she was lying. His own truth is hard to choke out. Sometimes he thinks he chokes on it when he speaks. But he gets the barbs out. Finally one day he can’t avoid it anymore.

“I hurt someone I love,” he says finally, “I was a coward and they moved on,” he looks down at his coffee, trying to put his words together in a way that makes sense, “which I know is my fault and I don’t blame him. But when I see him I just hear my dad’s voice.”

Afterwards Isobel walks over to him.

“Let’s get coffee,” she says, “real coffee,” she adds.

Alex doesn’t want to but he nods.

“Look, I love both of my brothers,” she says, “but Michael’s a physical person, he always has been,” she continues, “he’s either going to fight or fuck and since Max is asleep, it’s the latter.”

“Talking about this with you is weird,” Alex says.

“Weird’s my speciality,” Isobel says and points at him with her fork, “Michael likes you. More than anyone else. You’re his person. Or he wants you to be.”

“I doubt that,” Alex says.

“Stop being stubborn about this. You are,” she emphasizes, “he and Maria are cute but—“ she shakes her head, “cute just means you’ve got fucked up things no-one can see.”

“I thought your marriage was perfect,” Alex says.

“And I planned a parade in your honor,” Isobel replies, “things are never what they seem,” she sits back, “Michael needs this group,” she says. Alex shakes his head. Michael accepting help will be a cold day in hell, “he needs SAA first.”

“SAA?”

“Sex Addicts Anonymous,” Isobel says, completely straight faced before she grins.

“I resent them for not seeing it,” Isobel says in a careful tone, “I shouldn’t but I do,” she looks down, “it feels like I can’t trust anyone. Like I have to put on an act.”

Murmurs of agreement go up. Isobel runs her thumb across her finger.

“I’m afraid of my ring imprint fading. I’m afraid of looking normal and not being normal.”

Afterwards he waits by her car. She comes out and looks at him. Alex knows that he shouldn’t say anything, that everything should stay in the room but he grasps her hand.

“You’re never going to be normal to me.”

She hugs him so tightly he thinks she might have broken a rib.

“I need a ride to group,” she says over the phone, “my car’s in the shop. It seems stupid to ride separately anyway.”

“Sure, I can give you a ride,” Alex says, though they both know it’s a good idea for them to come separately. Even though everyone knows they’re acquaintances at this point, “I’ll be by in twenty minutes.”

He gets there and walks up to her door, ringing the bell. He hears her shout and would recognize the timber of the voice through the door anywhere. Instead of pretending to be oblivious, he glares as she opens the door. She motions in him in and he wants to protest actually but she’s an alien and he knows better than to get in her way. Her house is beautiful inside. Naturally Alex thinks the most beautiful thing in there is the one currently fishing in the fridge of a beer.

“I said I’d take you,” Michael says, “I just said I wasn’t going. Besides are you sure the other kooks there should be driving?”

“I don’t know Michael, what does your second beer think about it?” Isobel snaps, “forgive my brother. Though I guess I don’t have to explain that to you.”

Michael’s entire body stiffens and the word ‘kooks’ hangs in the air. He straightens up and looks at Alex who gives the tightest smile he’s given in weeks. Being around Michael is always hard. Always. In a million different ways apparently. Michael really is a miserable liar as his jaw hangs open and he looks between the pair of them like his worst nightmare has come true.

“No,” he says.

“Yes,” Isobel replies.

“Can we go?” Alex asks, “if we’re late—“

“Ugh, you’re right,” Isobel grabs her house keys, “come on.”

Michael stares. For once he and Alex are silent at the same time.

“We’re not avoiding each other,” Alex says. Isobel raises her eyebrows, “we just have nothing to say to each other.”

“Come on Alex, of course you do,” she argues, “you two are in love with each other.”

“He’s dating my friend,” Alex points out.

“From high school,” Isobel says, “and we agreed he’s using her. Not dating her. The fact that it’s gone on for this long is insane.”

Alex has somehow become the driver to group. Isobel’s car is back but he shows up early at her door and she goes. Sometimes Michael is there, sometimes he’s not. They don’t say anything to each other though and even Alex can admit he’s steaming into petty territory. It’s right next to coward-land and borders passive aggressive republic. The mirror hurts and though they are careful to not always be talking about group or therapy or how broken they are, sometimes the car rides can feel more like an extension of it.

“Can you come in?” Isobel asks. Alex looks at her, “I need a second opinion on something.”

“Isobel, just because I’m gay—“ he starts.

“Your jacket costs triple digits,” she snaps and he closes his mouth, “please? It’s black?”

Alex sighs and gets out of the car.

It’s easier.

Isobel leads him through the house. He can hear Michael in the other room with the radio on but he doesn’t want to think what that sound might be masquerading. Isobel leads him into her room and puts him on the chair, vanishing into her wardrobe. Alex almost sags with relief as she closes the doors. He’s gay but he doesn’t really want to know what kind of lingerie Isobel favors. Michael shuffles in a moment later and they acknowledge each other with quick nods. He turns and doesn’t acknowledge the disappointment that comes over Michael’s face. A moment later Isobel comes out in a short black dress that is deceptively modest until she shows that a large swath of her back is visible.

“Looking good, Iz,” Michael says.

“You look great,” Alex echoes.

“Thank you,” she says to him and glares at Michael, “I don’t trust your fashion sense.”

“I look good!” Michael protests.

Isobel looks back at Alex.

“I’m going on a date,” she says.

Alex is surprised at how happy he feels to hear this. Who would have thought he’d actively cheer on Isobel Evans of all people. But here they are. Again her determination shoves her through anything that might stand in her way.  

“That’s great, I’m so happy for you,” he says./

Isobel beams.

“He or she?” Michael asks.

Isobel flushes a pretty rose color.

“She.”

“We should go on a double date if this works out,” Isobel says.

Alex looks away. Michael shifts his weight and tries to look casual.

“Isobel,” he says.

“We should!” She says, “that way you can get into the dating pool and I’ll be there to wingman for you. I am the best wingman.”

Alex thinks he’s making some progress in therapy. He really does. So even though it hurts like hell he finds himself nodding.

“Good,” he says, “I’m going to need the help.”

The date doesn’t work out.

Neither does the next one.

It’s not until they’re at the Crashdown that Alex realizes why.

“Isobel,” he scolds, “you have to talk to her.”

Isobel looks crestfallen. It says a lot about the town that saying Liz’s cousin has decided to stay is just accepted. Or maybe it just says a lot about people in general. But if they’re facing everything then this is on the table. Isobel looks horribly unsure and Alex would let her get away with it, if Rosa didn’t keep looking in their direction like she wants to say something. Best wingman his ass. He signals her and she hesitates only a moment before running over.

“Hi,” Alex says, “you must be the cousin I’ve heard so much about. I’m Alex. This is Isobel.”

“Hi,” Isobel says. Rosa’s lips flicker.

“Hi,” she says.

“Isobel is the town event planner,” he says when they fall silent and just stare at each other, “she knows everywhere so if you need someone to show you around—“

“Liz is on it, I’m sure,” Isobel says, not taking her eyes off Rosa.

“Liz was gone for ten years,” Alex says, “I’m sure she doesn’t know all the spots you do.” Isobel’s foot collides with his prosthetic and she swears like that’s his fault, “she gives a great tour.”

“I’d love that,” Rosa says before Isobel can kill him.

“You would?” Isobel repeats. Rosa nods, already scribbling something, “here’s my number.”

“G-got it,” Isobel says taking the piece of paper before putting on her best smile. She types it into her phone and sends a text, “now you’ve got mine.”

“We’ll hook up sometime,” Rosa says.

“I’d like that.”

Alex has a feeling that this date will work out.

Thankfully Isobel doesn’t try to push him to date. Not like she threatened. Rosa doesn’t have any friends. And Isobel mysteriously drops the issue in a way Alex would harp on about but other things come up. Things like his dad. And Project Shepherd and deciding what to do with his life. He misses one group meeting and is late to the next. Even though he knows that the late arrival attention will make him probably be in the hot seat. He still goes because he needs to. He comes in as quietly as he can but no-one pays him any mind.

“We have a new member,” Dr. Delfino says, “would you like to introduce yourself?”

Michael forces his hands from twisting around his hat, clears his throat and looks at Dr. Delfino. At the last moment, when he reaches out Isobel grabs his hand and locks their fingers together. Whether that grounds him or physically keeps him from leaving, Alex isn’t sure. But he works his jaw with all the Michael Guerin stubbornness he knows.

“I’m Michael,” he says.

It’s a start.

[spaceskam]

and you will remove the space

Summary: months after the season one finale, michael and alex finally get back together

ao3

“Happy birthday to you!”

The whole room cheered for the Evans’ twins, each and every person somewhere on the drunken spectrum.  Alex had a little more than most due to the fact he was forced to attend.  Isobel threw a joint birthday party every year to keep up appearances and, since they’d just gotten Max back a week prior, this one had a required attendance.  That is unless you’d prefer to be receiving end of Isobel’s wrath for the next year.  Alex was already pretty high on her shit list after she had been informed on his history with Michael, so he wasn’t about to make it worse.

Originally, Alex had felt it was a little unfair.  It was technically Michael’s birthday too and, even though he understood why they couldn’t publically include him, it felt wrong.  But Michael had assured him that he didn’t like celebrating his birthday anyway, and he had sung the loudest with the biggest smile.  That might have more to do with the fact he’d had more to drink than Alex, though.

It had been a little over five months since Caulfield and since Michael had made the questionable decision to go to Maria.  Alex had been hurt at first, but quickly understood that Michael had acted out of despondent impulses.  That was proven by the fact they lasted a whopping five minutes.  The moment Max died, Michael exited himself out of the situation and Maria didn’t stop him.

Michael was basically functioning on negative emotions.  Sadness about his mother, panic about Max, straight up fear over his relationship with Alex.  He understood that Michael was struggling to even really look at him after seeing first hand how horrific the Manes family could actually be.  It took a couple weeks, but Alex had eventually been able to reassure him that they really were on the same side.  He genuinely was done walking away, done with letting things slip past, and had been working on proving to Michael just how serious he was.

The main thing that had helped Michael realize he wasn’t going anywhere had been just how hard Alex was working to help Max.  He had been dedicating his time to righting his father’s wrongs.  Project Shepard and saving Max Evans were his top priorities.  However, he and Michael didn’t start actually working together until Alex had offered to give him the files he’d found on every single one of the aliens that had been in Caulfield.

Turns out, they made a good team.  It wasn’t long before it became normal for Michael to pass out on the couch at his cabin, surrounded in pages of information.  Friendship felt like a breath of fresh air.  They were closer than ever, even though they were still skirting the topic of the exact nature of their relationship, and it was proving to be beneficial..

Together, they’d discovered that there was indeed an alternative to murder in order to get stronger.  Emotion.  Four months of Michael and Isobel strengthening their powers mixed with an hour of honing all the anger they had pent up‒which was a lot‒had successfully been enough to revive Max.  That had just left them with three extremely weak aliens.

For the first night, they’d insisted on staying together, meaning they’d all took shelter in Max’s house with Team Human played caregiver.  After a few nights, though, Max was eager for alone time with Liz and Michael just went home with Alex.  Though, instead of sleeping on the couch, he’d crashed in Alex’s bed when they had tried to watch a movie.  Neither of them had bothered to talk about it.

In hindsight, not saying anything had ended up being the best decision Alex had ever made.  With Max being alive, Alex really only had to focus on finding any other locations that might be holding aliens and that didn’t really require Michael’s assistance.  Yet, he still turned up most nights of the week out of habit.  They would talk about anything under the sun or watch movies‒last week they’d even started a TV series together.  Then, at the end of the night, they would both crawl into Alex’s bed.  They didn’t touch or anything, nor had they spoke about what exactly it all meant.  All Alex knew was that he was getting the best sleep he’d gotten in years and that, according to Liz, they were dating.

Still, even as Michael rested his head against Alex’s shoulder in public on his birthday, he wasn’t quite sure.  He hoped Liz was right, that they’d accidentally began dating.  He was just scared to ask‒he didn’t want to go back to sleeping alone.

But tonight he had enough alcohol in him to make him feel ballsy and Michael looking like he had not a care in the world fueled Alex even more.  Time to make a move.

“Dance with me.” Alex suddenly decided, tugging on Michael's sleeve.  Michael lifted his head and furrowed his eyebrows, but smiled nonetheless and reluctantly let Alex pull him to the dance floor.  

“Are you sure about this?” Michael asked.  Alex took another swig of his drink before abandoning it on a table for the night.  He pulled Michael closer.

“Absolutely not.  But Drunk Me is doing Sober Me a favor.” Alex insisted, slowly swaying to the shitty pop song that was too slow to dance to normally, but too fast to properly slow dance to.  “I’m tired of not knowing what we’re doing, aren’t you?” he hummed, not quite aware of just how bad he was slurring.  His head was spinning to the music, only settling when he rested his forehead on Michael’s.

“Yeah, I am.” Michael agreed, smiling easily  They both knew they were just waiting to see when the other was comfortable with the idea of them again.  And clearly, it only took a few drinks to make Alex admit that he was.

Alex moved to drape his arms around Michael’s neck.  The alien simply responded by gently tugging Alex’s hips into his own.  Everything was spinning except for Michael and his smile.  It was too easy to focus on just that and the different places they were touching.  Why hadn’t he made a move sooner?  How had he even functioned with Michael always being so close, but never knowing if he was allowed to touch him?  

There was a weird sort of pride to slow dancing with Michael Guerin.  They’d never done anything this public ever and, honestly, they might never again.  Alex would be alright with this being a stolen moment of public affection, a quiet way to confirm the suspicions of anyone who saw them together and confirm their own private queries.  Maybe it was the alcohol or maybe he genuinely just wanted everyone to know.  That way he could only regret so much once he sobered up.

“Are people staring?” Alex asked as he closed his eyes.  As much as he loved Michael’s face, he really just wanted to focus on the fact their heads were touching and their hips were touching and, if he was lucky, their lips might touch too. Still, that could only last so long before he needed to look at him again to make sure that this was real.

“Yeah,” Michael breathed, intrigue dancing in his eyes.  It put Alex even more at ease.  Michael liked the decisions Alex was making.  He liked playing.  He liked *him.

“Kiss me.” Alex blurted, his stomach tying in a million excited knots.  They hadn’t kissed in what felt like years.  Hell, even when Alex had been off on the other side of the world, it didn’t feel like it’d been that long.  But seeing Michael all the time and not being able to act made time move impossibly slow.

“There’s a lot of people here. You might regret that when you’re sober.” Michael pointed out, but didn’t move away when Alex nudged his nose against his.

“I’ll deal with that later.  Kiss me.” Alex damn near begged as more thoughts on how he would convince him to come home with him later.  Alex didn’t want to give him up, not tonight.  If he could kiss him until morning without breathing, he would.

“Are you sure?” Michael asked once more, the whiskey on his breath mixing with Alex’s as he nodded his head.  Michael grinned, “Okay.”

The space between them was immediately closed as Alex desperately went for his lips.  Michael laughed, his hands sliding to Alex’s cheeks as they kissed in a far too public place.  Hopefully, when they sobered the next morning, they would appreciate their public reunion.

“Alright, we don’t wanna get kicked out, do we?” Michael said, pulling away just a little bit.  Alex rubbed his nose against the other man’s, his heart beating so loudly in his ears that he could hardly hear the music.

A smile began growing on Alex’s face as it really set in what had just happened and all he could do to keep from announcing his joy to the world was bury his face into Michael’s neck.  Michael held him closer and Alex once again wanted to just kiss him as if they were alone.  But they weren’t.

“Can we go?” Alex requested, lifting his head to give a sloppy kiss that missed his lips by a few centimeters.  Michael laughed.  God, that was a beautiful sound.

“You said you wanted to dance and the song hasn’t even ended.” Alex shrugged, giving him another kiss that actually made it to his lips.  Yet kisses didn’t feel like enough and Alex felt reckless enough to let his hands moved to slide down his back and to his ass.  Michael acted fast in gripping his wrists, bringing them back to a respectable place.  “Okay, where do you wanna go, Private?”

“Anywhere.  My cabin, your trailer, the middle of the fucking desert if it means getting you alone.” Alex hummed, watching as Michael’s gaze tilted upwards.  A massive grin took over his face, his tongue gliding across his bottom lip and making Alex even more than a little eager to make his suggestion happen.

Michael kissed his temple before grabbing Alex’s hand and leading the way.  People bumped into them, said things, whispered more; Alex couldn’t hear a damn thing.  All he could see, hear, feel was him.  This beautiful, beautiful man. *His man.

They made it to the hallway where Alex found himself pressed against the wall.  Michael grabbed his chin, sealing a kiss like they weren’t five feet away from a party.  Alex was certain he was more drunk on his lips than he did on any of the alcohol he had.

“Okay, so neither of us should drive.  I could… call a cab.  Or we could go find Isobel’s guest room.  She told me to stay there tonight if I got too wasted tonight anyways.  She won’t mind.” Michael whispered, trailing soft kisses across his jaw and down his neck.

“Look at you, knowing when you shouldn’t drive.” Alex giggled, pulling Michael closer and pressing his body against the alien’s.  Michael huffed a laugh but still kissed at his neck in a sloppy, careless way.  There was a chance they’d wake up with hickeys like a pair of teenagers and they’d regret that in the morning.  But right now it felt too good to care.

“So you wanna stay here?”

“I really wanna get you out of those clothes.”

“Here it is then.”

The halls filled with their laughter as they both stumbled their way towards the guest room.  Michael pushed him inside, closing the door behind him and locking.  Alex smiled, everything really setting in as Michael came and sat beside him on the bed.  Their thighs were touching, hands too.  It suddenly felt like they were teenagers again and Alex found himself scared to go in for a kiss, scared he didn’t want it anymore.

“Do you forgive me?  For what I did?” Michael asked, tilting his head to face Alex.  He had three heads.  Alex hoped focusing on the middle one was right.

“Do you forgive me?  For what my dad did?” Alex asked back.  They fell silent for a moment and it became a little apparent neither of them was getting laid tonight.  And that was perfectly fine as long as something good still came from the night.

“I never blamed you,” Michael whispered, his eyes turning to the ground.  Alex nudged his knee with his own, trying to quietly get him to look at him once again. It didn’t work.

“It felt like you did.  Felt like… felt like I was born to hurt you or something.” Alex admitted.  He hated thinking about it, but it was the truth.  Every time he thought about it, so much of the bad in Michael’s life was directly tied to his family.  His legacy.  Even though he rejected that legacy, it was still his to have.  Had his family not been capturing aliens, Michael would’ve had a mother.  He wouldn’t have been abused, he wouldn’t have been in foster homes, he would’ve been loved.

“No.  Alex, no,” Michael said, turning to face him.  Alex involuntarily leaned towards him and he wondered if maybe they were too wasted to have this conversation.  Probably.  But they were going to have it anyways.  “Alex, you’re my home.  You don’t… you’ve hurt me in the past, but we’re different now.  And I’ve hurt you too, but… We’re better.  I love you, Alex.  I want to be with you.”

“I want to be with you too.” Alex murmured, his eyes pulling closed as he leaned in for a kiss.  He missed his lips.  Michael laughed.

“I think we should talk about this tomorrow.  Let’s go to sleep.” he said, his hand mindlessly rubbing Alex’s thigh.  “Can we cuddle?” Alcohol or not, a giggle bubbled out of Alex’s body as leaned against Michael.  The serious nature of their short-lived conversation was gone from his mind, replaced only with the idea of sleeping with Michael Guerin in his arms.

“Yeah.  Absolutely.”

Alex watched as Michael stripped down, not even trying to hide the fact he was watching.  Even if they forgot in the morning, currently, they had agreed they wanted to be together.  That meant he could stare all he wanted.  That was a nice thought.

“Alex, you gonna sleep fully clothed?  I know you don’t sleep like that at home.  We’ve been sharing a bed for a couple weeks, you know.” Michael pointed out, stepping towards the bed in nothing but a pair of boxers.  Alex considered death to make sure that would be the last thing he saw.  He leaned against the pillows.

“I like having you in my bed.” Alex grinned, sloppily trying to pry open the buttons of his shirt.  It proved to be much harder than he remembered.  Michael sat beside him, a dopey smile on his face as he began unbuttoning Alex’s shirt for him.  He let him easily.  “Why’d you keep coming back?  I was too scared to ask why you were staying because I didn’t want you to stop.” Ale admitted.

“I like being with you.  I got so used to sleeping with someone else in the house that when I tried to stay back at my trailer, I couldn’t sleep.  Then you didn’t seem to want me out of your bed… so I kept staying.  Now I don’t think I can go back to sleeping alone.” Michael admitted, tossing Alex’s shirt to the floor and beginning to unbutton his jeans.

“Me neither,” Alex admitted, reaching out to touch Michael’s arm.  “Stay forever.” Michael let out a childish giggle and Alex matched it easily, especially when he began pulling his jeans off.

“I can’t do that.  You’re gonna get sober and, like, throw me out or something.” Michael said, pulling Alex’s leg onto his lap and began to ever so carefully remove prosthetic.

Alex felt his mind settle and he suddenly felt a little more sober as he watched his idle fingers pull it off and place it on the ground.  He gulped hard as Michael gently slid off the sock and placed it on the bedside table.  When Michael pressed a gentle kiss right above where his leg now ended, Alex couldn’t breathe.

“Are you ready to go to bed?” Michael asked, giving a kind smile.

“Michael, I love you,” Alex said definitively, leaning forward and gently grabbing his chin.  “I love you so much.”

“I love you too.” Michael murmured, leaning forward and sealing their night with a kiss.

The two men crawled into bed, facing each other with little space between them.  Alex was tired, but he couldn’t seem to get rid of the giddy feeling he had.  Months of having Michael sleeping closer to him each night had finally granted him the moment of closing all the space between them.  When Michael pulled him close, Alex closed his eyes and finally let all the fatigue in his mind take over.  It was enough to make decades of space worth it.

He only hoped he would remember it all in the morning.

[allthefilmsiveseenforfree]

Knives Out

I’ve been vibrating with anticipation from the moment I saw the first trailer for Knives Out, a star-studded classic whodunnit from Rian Johnson. The premise is simple - Harlan Thrombey (Christopher Plummer in peak jovial grandpa mode) has made his fortune writing murder mystery novels that the world loves, and is the patriarch of a sniping, backbiting family who all feel entitled to a piece of that fortune. The morning after Harlan’s 85th birthday party, he is found dead in an apparent suicide - but his nurse and best friend Marta (Ana de Armas, who steals the show) knows there is more to the story. A private investigator named Benoit Blanc (Daniel Craig) has been hired to unravel the mystery of the case, and in the course of his investigation he discovers that everyone in the family is a suspect.

 I love a good murder mystery, and this one had lots of elements that looked like they would add up to a rollicking good time - Chris Evans playing against type as a trust fund asshole; Daniel Craig doing his best Belles, Bourbon, and Bullets murder mystery dinner theater accent; two massive and Very Good German Shepherds; and more twists and turns than a pretzel on a rollercoaster. Plus there’s that thing where it has a 96% on Rotten Tomatoes and a 94% audience rating. All that adds up to some sky-high expectations for this pulpy mystery to give you a couple of hours of respite from your most aggravating relatives over a long Thanksgiving holiday weekend. Does it actually deliver on what it promises? Well...

This is one of the rare cases this year where my expectations were this high and were still exceeded. Johnson’s script is tight, the actors are all having the time of their lives, and the mystery is clever and even manages to retain a sense of real human emotion and tragedy at its core. Do not miss out on the chance to see this one in theaters with a live audience that gasps and laughs and, like my theater, even applauds when it’s all over. 

Some thoughts:

So often the victim at the center of a murder mystery is just a means to an end, or an asshole that you don’t really feel that sad about. But one of the best decisions made in this script is to make Harlan feel like a real person with real relationships. His friendship with Marta is sweet and feels like it’s built on genuine respect and love. In spite of their age difference, you feel a true kinship between them - the rest of the family goes on and on about how they consider Marta family and will “take care of her” with Harlan’s money, but Harlan is the only one who treats her like a real person. You feel his loss acutely at the center of the film, and it makes solving the mystery feel all the more urgent.

That being said, Harlan’s sense of decor in the house is fucking terrifying, all these dolls and figurines are made of straight up nightmares.

Ana de Armas is really the center of the whole film, and her performance here is off-the-charts. She’s vulnerable, earnest, conniving, put-upon, terrified, and resolute in equal measure, and just a real delight to watch onscreen. And her character’s incredible plot device of never being able to tell a lie without puking is inspired. 

Keep that in mind - if you are sensitive to vomit, please be warned there is quite a bit of it in the film and it can get REALLY gross in places.

Marta’s other main purpose is to act as a counterpoint to all the WASPy awfulness of this rich, entitled family. If you have to spend any time around racist relatives this holiday weekend (and I specifically mean the casual microaggression type of racism) you’ll definitely empathize with Marta as each member of the Thrombey family says some variation of “You’re from ___, right?” and lists a different country.

The film’s greatest asset is the cast - you don’t get better ensembles than this. Jamie Lee Curtis, Don Johnson, Michael Shannon, Riki Lindhome, and Toni Collette are the adult generation, squabbling over their pieces of the Thrombey publishing empire and shit-talking each other’s kids. Then there’s Chris Evans, Jaeden Martell, and Katherine Langford as the younger generation, each their own brand of insufferable - one’s a trust fund layabout in a Beemer, one’s an alt-right prep school punk, and one’s a bra-burning Sarah Lawrence peak white feminist. Each and every one of these actors is given a distinct, interesting piece of the mystery to sink their teeth into, and each character brings something new and different to the table. The first sequence of questioning from Blanc feels like a ballet, with each character lying and flashbacks revealing the truth in an elegant, twisting dance. The sum is so much greater than the parts, and it helps that everyone looks like they’re really having fun. 

None more so than Chris Evans though, who doesn’t show up until about 45 minutes in, but when he does, things really kick into high gear. His delivery of scathing sarcastic retorts is downright gleeful, and I would like to petition the universe to always ensure that he is wearing this kind of New England chic with thick wooly sweaters and camel driving coats and intricately patterned scarves. That’s one Boston boy who can wear the HELL out of a cable knit, and it’s a joy (for many reasons) to watch.

Even with a cast this great, the movie only works because the script is tight and the mystery is interesting. There are lots of fun little call-backs and payoffs to earlier lines - this is one of the few movies this year I actually want to go see twice in the theaters just to catch things that I may have missed the first time. 

Did I Cry? I did not, but I felt a definite sadness every time Marta looked at the large portrait of Harlan, because I could feel her missing him. 

This movie is seriously a goddamn delight. Go see it immediately and just let yourself be taken on the ride - there are few films this year I’ve flat-out enjoyed more.

If you liked this review, please consider reblogging or subscribing to my Patreon! For as low as $1, you can access bonus content and movie reviews, or even request that I review any movie of your choice.

[wilmonism]

Knowledge - A Wolfstar Oneshot

He knew back in fifth year. It was Christmas break and only two of the Marauders were staying. Sirius, after hearing Remus was not going home for the holidays, decided to stay too. As much as he loved the Potters and going to their house, he preferred to make sure that no friend of his spent such glorious time alone. Or so he had told Remus.

At first, Remus enjoyed the idea of being alone with his best friend. They could play some pranks, read muggle romantic novels (Sirius’ guilty pleasure) and just appreciate the presence of the other. But when Remus realized that he knew, his whole world collapsed

He knew because of Sirius’ small smile every time Remus came up with a new idea for a prank; it was almost indiscernible, it looked more like a grimace than anything else but Remus was aware that it was more than that. It was Sirius’ way to unwittingly show affection.

He knew because of the way Sirius would caress his hair when they were by the fire of the Common Room, each of them reading their own copy of Madame Bovary. Remus wondered if Sirius noted what he was doing, or if he was just doing it from habit.

He knew when Sirius looked at him like he had never done before. It was a look of fondness, even adoration. Remus wondered what he had done to deserve someone as whole as Sirius, who had many flaws but Remus was conscious that the way he loved, so uniquely and loyally and purely, was his biggest virtue.

And then he was assured that he knew when the break was over and it all went back to normal. He knew when Peter and James were back and suddenly Sirius stopped giving him that small smile, stopped touching him at all and stopped looking at him as more than a friend.

Remus knew.

—————————————————————

He knew when they shared a bed together for the first time, during their sixth year. All of the Marauders were aware that Sirius had awful nightmares that prevented him of having a proper sleep some nights. But none of them knew about Remus’ nightmares. They were the reason the werewolf would wake up sweat-soaked almost every night. He had been careful to surround his bed by Silencing Charms since their first year. He had asked Flitwick to teach him, explaining his situation and not wanting his new dorm mates to find out the reason of his screaming late at night. The teacher had empathised and agreed to do it. It took Remus one month and a half to learn them and thenceforward placed them around his bed.

One night, though, Remus was too exhausted to do it and fell immediately asleep the moment he touched the mattress. He woke after three hours of sleep, forcefully fidgeting and emitting loud moans of pain. He had been dreaming about Greyback biting him again and then his father, his mother, James, Peter, Sirius…

He knew when he felt a soft but firm hand on his shoulder. He knew when he looked up and met Sirius’ grey, beautiful eyes. They were looking at him with that look that was able to disarm Remus and turn his insides to jelly. There was worry in them, too. They didn’t say anything, Remus just moved and Sirius lay beside him, his hand now holding Remus’ callused one. They dozed off like that.

He knew when he woke up and admired Sirius’ sleeping form. His mouth was slightly opened, his breathing coming out in swift motions. His long hair covered his side of the pillow. His hand was no longer holding his; instead it was around his waist, holding him in a tight embrace.

He knew when Sirius opened his eyes, blushed and removed his arm. He knew when he went back to his bed, making sure none of his friends saw them sleeping together.

Remus knew.

—————————————————————

He knew because Sirius was just too Sirius. He was too Sirius with his high cheekbones and sharp edges and his gorgeous grey eyes that turned a bit blue when the sun hit them and his messy bun held by his wand and his loud but soft laugh and the wrinkles that would appear around his eyes when he smiled with that big smile of his that Remus just loved too much to be healthy and his voice that was like velvet.

And he knew when his features were being touched by someone else and when his eyes were looking at someone else and when the reason of his laugh was someone else and when the wrinkles suddenly appeared because someone else had said something funny and when he smiled at someone else and he talked smoothly to someone else.

Remus knew.

—————————————————————

He knew the first time they kissed. They were in the Astronomy Tower, just the two of them. James remained in the Common Room, chatting Evans up. Peter’s location was unknown, not that they cared much. In that moment, they just cared about each other.

They were doing nothing the moment it happened, just staring up at the starry, moonlit sky. It was the beginning of their final year at Hogwarts and the Marauders felt every day more nostalgic. They had decided to throw a party that made sure that the upcoming year, none of the remaining students would forget about them. The party continued, but Sirius and Remus agreed that they needed fresh air and together, they parted.

Remus was observing the waning crescent moon when he felt slow breathing on his neck. Remus snapped his head toward Sirius, who was sitting next to him, closer than just a few seconds ago. He was looking at him, his grey eyes almost black with desire. Like magnets, they kept moving closer until there was no space between them.

Their mouths collided; their tongues fought a battle over control. Sirius tasted of chocolate liqueur, cigarettes and home. His lips were a bit chapped but Remus wondered if he would ever get enough of them.

It was over sooner than Remus would have wanted or expected but then it started again and again and again. They spent the whole night discovering the addiction their mouths were for the other.

He knew when they went back to their dormitory late at night. Everyone was sleeping; James with a small smile on his face and Remus was sure that Sirius was also wondering how things with Lily had gone. He knew when they shared a last kiss, deep and significant as any other.

Remus knew.

—————————————————————

He knew the first time they had sex. It happened just three days before the Full Moon. Remus was going crazy with lust now that he had someone that made his fantasies and needs feel too real. Their dormitory was miraculously empty and Remus and Sirius took advantage of it.

Their kissing reached a point in which their mouths were not enough. They both needed more. Remus’ hands travelled through Sirius’ whole body, carefully, as if he was a valuable and fragile piece of art. Sirius responded with his mouth, placing kisses everywhere. It was too much; Remus could feel the wolf inside him howl with desire, could feel himself groaning with pleasure.

Sirius looked at him, no grey left in his darkened eyes. He pleaded Remus to take him, to make him his. Remus complied, not wasting time. Their clothes disappeared with a swift movement of someone’s wand; they were not sure who did it, they seemed to be one.

He knew the moment he was inside Sirius, both moaning each other’s name. He knew because Sirius looked at him as if Remus was the piece of art, not him.

Remus knew.

—————————————————————

He knew on their last day of school. Everyone was extremely emotional; even Sirius was crying, his bad boy façade being destroyed by the tears that were rolling down his face.

The Marauders (plus James’ girlfriend, nothing less than Lily Evans) were sitting on their favourite couch in the packed Common Room. James was reminding them of all their adventures and mischief together, of how Lily had despised them by that time and of how fond she was now of the four of them.

Nobody saw it coming, not even Remus. Sirius got up and walked towards him, grabbing his hands and pulling him up. He kissed him full in the mouth, in front of everyone else. For the space of a heartbeat, Remus’ eyes widened but then closed. Remus kissed the other boy back hungrily.

He heard Peter falling to the floor, Lily’s gasp and James’ triumphant exclamation. When they broke apart, their friends were all looking at them, wide smiles plastered on their faces. Remus couldn’t stop smiling himself. He didn’t care that everyone in the Common Room was now staring at the couple with shocked expressions.

He knew when they sat back down, now on the same couch, their legs entwined, making it impossible to know where started Remus’ and where ended Sirius’. He knew when Sirius’ whispered words reached his ears.

“I love you.”

Remus knew.

—————————————————————

He knew the day his world ended. James, Lily and Peter were dead. Harry was an orphan. Sirius was their murderer, indirectly and directly. Remus was alone.

He knew as he watched Sirius’ picture staring at him from the Daily Prophet; his mane wild and his eyes like nothing he was used to. The sweet beam on them was gone for good.

He knew as he was surrounded by his depression, by his loss, by his grief. He knew as Remus hated himself because he missed him. He missed James, Lily, Peter and Harry. But he also missed Sirius. He missed his good morning kisses, his laugh, his smile, his velvety voice. He missed everything about him. He hated him for what he had done. At the same time, Remus still loved Sirius. He didn’t believe he would ever stop loving the man that had meant so much happiness once and now meant so much misery.

Remus knew.

Remus always knew that Sirius would be the one to break him.