#though I guess I could try and take a crack at drawing him in a suit........... if anyone wants to see that <.<''< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[bigeloo]

If you’re still taking requests… my magnymagic all dressed up. he’s at a fancy gala

drops this and skitters away

[charchev]

Blue Lock boys meeting your younger sibling for the first time!

bllk x gn!reader

Nagi Seishiro

Nagi would approach the situation with his usual laid-back demeanor. He’d likely stay quiet at first, letting you do the introductions. If your younger sibling shows interest in gaming or something Nagi enjoys, he’d open up more.

If your sibling is shy, Nagi wouldn’t push conversation but might share something like, “Wanna play? I’ll let you win… maybe.” He’s not the most social, but his casual nature could make your sibling feel comfortable.

“This is fine as long as it’s not too much effort. They’re not bad, though.”

Reo Mikage

Reo would be warm and welcoming from the start, trying to make the best impression. He’d see your sibling as an extension of you, so he’d go out of his way to ensure they felt comfortable and liked him.

Reo would ask your sibling about their interests and might even have a small gift prepared in advance. Whether it’s a soccer ball, a book, or a treat, he’d nail the gesture. If they like soccer, he’d offer to teach them a few moves.

“I want them to like me—gotta make sure they think I’m the coolest.”

Sae Itoshi

Sae would remain polite but reserved, more focused on you than your sibling. He wouldn’t be unkind, but he might take a bit of time to warm up to them.

If your sibling idolizes him as a soccer player, Sae would indulge them with brief but thoughtful answers to their questions. He’d be slightly amused if they tried to impress him and might even give them a small compliment.

“They’re fine, I guess. As long as they’re not too noisy.”

Rin Itoshi

Rin would be visibly tense and unsure how to interact. He’s not great with social situations, especially involving kids or younger people. However, he’d make an effort for your sake.

Rin would probably stick to short sentences like, “Hi,” or “Nice to meet you.” If your sibling challenges him to a game or asks him about soccer, he’d reluctantly participate but might get overly competitive without realizing it.

“What do I even say? Don’t want to mess this up.”

Bachira Meguru

Bachira would be thrilled to meet your sibling and immediately treat them like a friend. His playful energy would make the situation fun and relaxed.

He’d start chatting with them as if they’ve known each other for years, asking about their favorite things and suggesting fun activities. If your sibling is shy, he’d find a way to draw them out of their shell, like making funny faces or telling a silly story.

“This is so much fun! I’m gonna make them my partner-in-crime.”

Alexis Ness

Alexis would be polite, charming, and composed when meeting your sibling. He’d see it as an opportunity to impress you by showing how well he handles family dynamics.

Alexis would ask thoughtful questions to get to know your sibling and would adapt to their personality. If they’re shy, he’d be gentle and encouraging. If they’re outgoing, he’d match their energy while still maintaining his elegant demeanor.

“It’s important I get along with them—they’re part of y/n’s world.”

Michael Kaiser

Kaiser would approach the meeting with charisma and confidence, treating it like a performance where he has to win your sibling’s favor.

He’d try to dazzle your sibling with his charm, cracking jokes and showing off (especially if they’re into soccer). If your sibling is unimpressed, he might pretend to be hurt, saying something dramatic like, “What? You don’t think I’m the coolest guy your sibling knows?”

“This should be easy—I’m great with people.”

i picked my favs to do this with so i may do a second part with more ^_^

[xuchiya]

"Quick Reaction" || kang yeosang || one-shot

| genre: non!idol ateez. fluff. slice of life | mentions: teasing. fainting. jewelry gift. | This is literally my high school delusions. My old school is literally an 'old school' school like no phones and computers, being in a relationship is not allowed, and big ass windows as our source of fans--- i mean we do have electric fans and ceiling fans but with the weather and a very old, close to dying, e-fans? We really have to depend on the wind from our windows. Anyways, this list is basically a true experience. My personal favorite? Song Mingi's.

You were bored out of your mind, wishing you could have brought your book or your drawing pad to pass time, although everything seemed to be going smoothly—until your professor called you to the faculty room. "You're missing an assignment," she said, a hint of amusement in her voice as she added, "and so is your classmate, Kang Yeosang."

Anything but that. You cried, stomping your foot to the ground out of frustration. You sighed internally, mentally retracing your steps to figure out which assignment had slipped through the cracks. As you walked to the faculty room, carrying your notebook and pen, you bumped into Yeosang, who had the same expression of concern on his face. You both exchanged knowing glances, resigned to your fate.

“You lost your assignment?” Yeosang asks. You shake your head, “I’m not sure either but I know I wrote it and had a perfect score. What about you?”

Yeosang shrugs, “I guess I was cutting class when it was given.” Both of you giggling knowing that is farfetched. He never does and never will, most especially his mom is your math adviser. Besides, there are guards blocking the two entrances of your school gates, so there is no point in cutting class unless you decide to fake ‘sickness’ to not attend school.

Standing outside the faculty room, you could hear your professor bustling about. "Alright, since you two are here, I’ll dictate the assignment instead, but since students aren’t allowed inside, I’ll give you the answers too. Be quick, though—it needs to be passed immediately and the head will not be happy to have students inside."

You pouted, “We could just work inside the classroom.” 

“Oh … you’re right. You may go but I hope to get this one before dismissal and ask one of your classmates to dictate some of the homeworks you both are missing.”

And that’s how you found yourself inside your classroom. Yeosang stays at the other but you both agree to stay at your classroom instead. You pulled out your notebook, your pen poised to capture every word. Years of training as a news anchor for your upcoming college years had honed your ability to take notes swiftly and efficiently. Yeosang, however, wasn’t faring as well. As your classmate, Hongjoong rattled off the questions and answers, you noticed him out of the corner of your eye, struggling to keep up. His eyes darted from his notebook to yours, then back again, frustration clear on his face.

"Hey, hey, what’s this..." he whispered urgently, tapping you on the shoulder to grab your attention, leaning over your shoulder. It wasn’t until you leaned back to check on him that both of you realized how close you were. Your faces stopped just inches apart, your breath brushing against his lips. Yeosang froze, his gaze trailing over your features, taking in every detail. His heart pounded in his chest as he noticed every imperfection—each one making him feel something unfamiliar yet undeniably warm.

"Hey, if you two are gonna kiss, let me turn around first!" Hongjoong teased, breaking the moment.

Startled, you both pulled away, cheeks burning with embarrassment. You quickly handed your notebook to Yeosang, avoiding eye contact as you nervously fiddled with your pen. Meanwhile, he hid his face behind your notebook, furiously scribbling down the remaining answers, trying to ignore the heat still lingering on his cheeks.

As both of you finished the assignment, he took your notebook and he handed the assignment to Hongjoong who insisted on bringing them to your professor since he will be passing by the faculty room and towards the auditorium. After thanking Hongjoong, Yeosang glanced at you, a shy smile tugging at the corners of his lips. You met his gaze for a brief moment, sharing a silent understanding, before both of you looked away, the air between you filled with unspoken words and the beginnings of something new.

[wifelivvyx]

Hey! I just saw that your looking for requests and I was wondering if you could do something with James Potter taking care of the reader when she’s sick?

I love nothing more than a good hurt/comfort trope haha (especially with James. He’s such a sweetheart).

THIS!! omgg ofc x

The fire in the Gryffindor common room crackled softly, sending flickering shadows across the walls. The usually bustling space was quiet, as most students were out enjoying the unusually sunny winter afternoon. James Potter, however, was not among them.

Instead, he was standing outside the door to the girls' dormitories, balancing a tray laden with a steaming bowl of soup, a cup of tea, and a small plate of biscuits. His brow furrowed in concentration as he muttered a quiet “Alohomora,” the door clicking open without protest. He hesitated for a moment, as if second-guessing himself, before stepping inside.

The dormitory smelled faintly of lavender and parchment. He found you bundled up in bed, a mountain of blankets nearly swallowing you whole. Your usually bright eyes were dull, your cheeks flushed with fever, and a tissue was clutched loosely in your hand. A small groan escaped your lips as you shifted, clearly uncomfortable.

James’s throat bobbed as he swallowed nervously. “Oi, you look… um… awful,” he muttered, his attempt at humor falling flat. He quickly set the tray down on your bedside table and rubbed the back of his neck, avoiding your gaze. “Why didn’t you tell someone you were feeling this bad?”

You blinked up at him, your voice hoarse as you replied, “Didn’t want to… bother anyone.”

James huffed, his brows drawing together. “That’s stupid,” he said, though there was no heat in his words. He stepped closer, hesitating before gently pressing the back of his hand against your forehead. His touch lingered a moment too long before he snatched his hand back, his ears tinged pink. “You’ve got a fever,” he muttered, as if you didn’t already know.

“You didn’t have to come up here,” you rasped, your voice barely above a whisper.

“Yeah, well, someone had to,” he said gruffly, dragging a chair closer to your bed. He plopped down with exaggerated nonchalance, crossing his arms as if to shield himself from any vulnerability. “It’s not like I’d just leave you to rot up here alone. What kind of… mate would I be?”

Despite his words, his gaze softened as he reached for the cup of tea. He blew on it, his brow furrowed in concentration, before holding it out to you. “Drink this. Slowly,” he instructed, his tone awkwardly authoritative.

You took the cup, your fingers brushing his as you did. He pulled his hand back quickly, his eyes darting away. “Thanks, James,” you murmured.

He shrugged, his cheeks reddening. “It’s nothing. Just… part of the Marauder Code. Look after your… mates and all that.” His voice cracked slightly on the last word, and he cleared his throat, trying to mask his embarrassment.

“You’re awfully bossy,” you teased weakly, managing a small smile.

“I’m… efficient,” he corrected, wagging a finger at you. His attempt at humor earned a quiet laugh from you, but it quickly turned into a coughing fit. James’s expression shifted instantly, his hand hovering uncertainly over your back before he finally placed it there, rubbing gentle circles. “Easy, easy,” he murmured, his voice low and soothing.

When the fit subsided, you slumped back against the pillows, exhausted. “Sorry,” you whispered, avoiding his gaze.

“Don’t… don’t apologize,” he said, his tone unusually soft. He sat back, fidgeting with the hem of his jumper. “You can… I mean, you don’t have to worry about me or whatever. Just… focus on getting better, yeah?”

James stayed with you long after the tea and soup were finished, fumbling through a textbook and reading aloud in exaggerated voices to make you laugh. His attempts at humor were clumsy but endearing, his genuine effort shining through his embarrassment.

Eventually, as the firelight flickered lower and your exhaustion deepened, you shifted uncomfortably under the mountain of blankets. James noticed immediately, his brow furrowing. “You alright?”

“Just cold,” you mumbled, barely coherent. The fever had left you shivering despite the layers.

James hesitated, rubbing the back of his neck as if weighing his options. Then, with a quiet huff, he stood up and began peeling off his jumper, leaving him in his undershirt. Without a word, he slid into the bed beside you, maneuvering carefully so he wouldn’t jostle you too much.

“What are you doing?” you croaked, though you didn’t sound upset—just surprised.

“Warming you up,” he muttered, his voice gruff. “Don’t make it weird.”

Before you could respond, he draped an arm around you, pulling you gently against his chest. His warmth was immediate and soothing, and despite his earlier embarrassment, he held you firmly, his thumb tracing absentminded circles on your shoulder.

“Better?” he asked quietly, his breath stirring your hair.

You nodded against him, too tired to argue. “Yeah. Thanks.”

For a while, neither of you spoke. The sound of his steady heartbeat and the crackling fire lulled you into a peaceful haze. James shifted slightly, resting his chin on the top of your head.

“Don’t tell Sirius about this,” he muttered, half-joking but with an edge of sincerity. “I’ll never hear the end of it.”

You smiled faintly, your eyes already drifting shut. “Your secret’s safe with me.”

As you fell asleep, James tightened his hold on you just a little, his earlier awkwardness melting away. Though he’d never admit it, he could’ve stayed like that forever if it meant keeping you safe and warm.

[nataliescatorccioapologist]

Who I think will be Team Nat and Team Shauna this season

We all know a group divide is coming this season, with Shauna trying to turn everyone against Natalie to take her place as leader. I don’t think many will actually want Shauna as their new leader, but they’ll recognize the flaws in Nat’s leadership, have their doubts, and—let’s be honest—Shauna scares them.

Aside from Coach Ben (since he’s not really part of the group right now), here’s how I think the sides will break down, at least initially.

Team Nat (or just anti-Shauna):

Lottie

This is a tricky one, but I do think (and sincerely hope) that Lottie will take Nat’s side this season. She chose Nat as the new leader for a reason—she believes in her and sees her as the Wilderness’ favorite, a belief she still holds even 25 years later. Lottie might view Shauna’s leadership as going against the Wilderness’ intentions and, therefore, oppose her attempt to take Nat down to claim the top spot. However, Lottie has been so unpredictable lately that I’m not entirely sure whose side she’ll take—or if she’ll take one at all.

Misty

I know Misty already betrayed Nat by ratting her out to Shauna, but I see this as an impulsive decision driven by her deep need to feel liked and important. She knew Shauna would appreciate the information, and you can see her beaming when Shauna tells her not to tell anyone else—she just craves connection and a sense of belonging.

However, once the girls actually find Coach Ben, I think Misty’s loyalty to Nat will solidify. Both of them have been close to him, and neither wants to see him die, which could serve as a point of connection between them. As a result, I think Misty will start standing up for Nat’s decisions. She also shares a sense of kinship with Nat, as they’re both outsiders in their own ways, and her deep attachment to Nat is clear in the adult timeline, given how much she grieves her death. Because of this, I ultimately believe Misty will take Nat’s side.

Britt and Robin

This is honestly just complete guessing on my part, but it looks like Robin was crying for Nat when she’s (beaten down?) in the center of the circle in those promo images. So maybe she is on Nat’s side? And I’m just lumping Britt into this because I have no idea who she is yet and I’m considering her and Robin to just be one unit or package deal basically. I do think they’ll eventually turn against Nat though, just to avoid the wrath of Shauna.

Akilah?

Hard to tell with Akilah because she does seem to believe in the Wilderness pretty strongly. I think she is so kind-hearted and gentle that I can’t see her taking Shauna’s side. She seems to have a moral compass and whenever something violent is happening within the group she always looks like she does not want to be involved (even when she was chasing down Nat after the card draw), so maybe she’ll identify with Nat’s view of things.

Team Shauna (or just anti-Nat):

Taissa

Similarly, Tai also wanted to be chosen as leader. She is pragmatic and logical, and I think those traits are making her see the cracks in Nat’s leadership even more. She has already criticized Nat’s ability to calm tensions within the group with Shauna and Mari, so I think she is going to continue to notice Nat’s weaknesses and believe she shouldn’t be leading the group. I don’t think she will want Shauna to become the new leader, but she will help take Nat down. She has also always been close with Shauna, so that might play into things, as well.

Melissa

She will be anti-Nat purely because Shauna is anti-Nat. So far it seems like Melissa is Shauna’s lap dog in a sense, she will do anything Shauna wants her to and Shauna knows that. I think Shauna is going to use Melissa to help take Nat down. And Melissa is just along for the ride because of her feelings for Shauna.

Gen

Even though Nat is the one who taught her how to hunt, I just have a feeling she will be Team Shauna and I’m really not sure why (she barely has any screen time so I’m just going off of vibes here). She was suspiciously really into the card draw hunt.

In the middle:

Van

I think Van is going to be very conflicted this season. I think she cares for and believes in Nat, and as a strong follower of the Wilderness I think she is confident in what she has been told is the Wilderness’s choice of Nat as the new leader. From what we’ve seen so far, Van seems to be empathetic towards Nat’s struggles attempting to lead a group that resists being governed. However, she also obviously loves Taissa, and Tai feels like she should have been chosen. Tai also doesn’t believe in Nat’s ability to lead effectively, and Van will likely want to be a supportive partner and stand behind her on that. So I think she will kind of be in the center of the divide, but maybe leaning just a bit more towards the Shauna side of things for the sake of staying with Taissa.

Travis

Travis is really tricky to place here because, obviously, he and Nat were romantically involved and he did (and possibly still does) love her despite everything. It has been confirmed that they’re broken up at the moment, though, and he and Nat haven’t spoken a single word to each other so far. He also appears to question her decision to put Mari on house arrest, as he gives her a very pointed look and shakes his head at her (I think this is actually the only look the two of them share in those first two episodes).

I think, at this point, Travis is just trying to survive and find belonging anywhere he can. I don’t think he will be against Nat, I’m sure he still harbors some care and love for her (we know they do end up getting back together at some point), but I also don’t think he will have the strength to stand fully behind her right now. He is deeply grieving and a bit broken right now, so I don’t think he’ll really take a side. I think he is probably afraid to speak up at all after what happened during Doomcoming, and after what happened to Javi. These girls are scary!

Mari

Mari is also hard to place because she’s pretty pissed at both Shauna and Nat right now. I can’t see her taking either of their sides. I definitely don’t think she would be pro-Shauna being leader, but she doesn’t seem to be very pro-Nat either. But maybe her time with Coach Ben will cause her to feel some sympathy for him, which in turn might put her on Nat’s side as she might also want to spare his life (he did give her hot chocolate! That would win me over for sure).

[fisherobsessedmyb]

(sal and larry + little brother reader) oooo well I used to have a lot of nightmares as a kid, and I would have loved to have a sibling to hug, so maybe something about that? lil brother coming crying to them at night and asking to sleep next to them where it’s warm and safe, MAYBE he’s having the nightmares due to the ghosts and demons in the apartment, and they both get a lil mad and go out of their way to find whatever is causing it :)

could be headcanons, or if it’s too short then a small oneshot would also work, but you do you! and yes, you have a life outside of tumblr, take your time! :D thank you!

🔹Sal/Larry older brother hcs!🔹

🔹Sal Fisher/Larry Johnson X M!Younger Sibling!Reader!🔹

🔹CW|nightmares i guess?🔹

🔹Sal and larry would definitely have different approaches to comforting their younger brother after a nightmare🔹

🔹Though both would be caring and helpful🔹

🔹Sal would be able to empathise a lot due to his night terrors and would maybe try to relate by sharing the fact he has his own nightmares🔹

🔹Larry would probably crack a joke or two to cheer his younger brother up, but he'd also listen if that was what he needed🔹

🔹Maybe one particular night their younger brother left his bedroom during the night after a particularly bad nightmare, to find them🔹

🔹And maybe saw them watching tv so he sat inbetween them on the couch🔹

🔹I can imagine Sal asking if hes okay, and why hes up🔹

🔹Which then may lead to either their brother crying remembering the dream, or bottling up those emotions and lying🔹

🔹If he lied, i think larry would pick up on it, along with sal🔹

🔹Larry might pat his back gently, asking something along the lines of"you sure, dude? Youre not usually up this late"🔹

🔹And sal might ask softly something like "you dont have to lie, y/n. Whats wrong?"🔹

🔹Which would lead to their brother admitting he had a nightmare and being visibly more anxious, though he calms down with the comfort of larry and sal🔹

🔹In the case that he just admits that he had a nightmare though, i imagine he'd still be shaken up and maybe tear up a bit, looking down at his hands🔹

🔹Which just might be fidgeting like sals do(a/c:sals hand do fidget/twitch in the game when hes younger!)🔹

🔹He'd be embarrassed, saying quietly something like "i had another nightmare, i dont know why"🔹

🔹His voice may even crack a bit, leading sal and larry to worry more🔹

🔹But i imagine sal would gladly hug his brother(if wanted) without hesitation, sympathising with his brother🔹

🔹Larry would probably pat his back, listening🔹

🔹I imagine theyd be 10x more concerned and sympathetic once their brother describes his nightmare🔹

🔹Given the details, it isnt hard to tell that theyre influenced by the apartments🔹

🔹I imagine larry being pissed, feeling protective🔹

🔹I imagine sal would feel equally as protective, though less angry and more worried🔹

🔹But they'd keep those feelings down for the moment, focusing on comforting him🔹

🔹In either scenario, theyd comfort their brother, and sit with him watching tv until he fell asleep again🔹

🔹Then discuss what to do about it🔹

🔹I imagine they'd continue to comfort their younger brother after every nightmare, while trying to stop them🔹

🔹Sal might sit with their younger brother until he falls asleep🔹

🔹And larry might draw with him until they fall asleep(on his shoulder)🔹

🔹In the end, they'd end up getting rid of their younger brother's nightmares🔹

🔹Though, they'd still stay with him to help them feel safer🔹

🔹I think theyd take turns staying up incase their younger sibling woke up🔹

🔹Theyd always be ready to comfort him when he wakes up, even if he didnt wake up from a nightmare🔹

A/n:i wasnt sure how to end this lol but i hope this is ok, anon! Brains a lil funky lately o.0 n ive been busy so it was harder 2 come up w/ stuff but yk :) hope ya enjoy, it was fun writin! happy reading!

[frozenjokes]

do we think cannibalism is a good idea yet? please? please do cannibalism?

“Hey, you okay, Mumbo? Can I come up? I’m thinking I’m going to come up regardless of what you say, but I’d like it if you just said yes.”

It was Scar. Mumbo said nothing. Scar hit his head twice attempting to get in with a trident, but made it on the third go, sighing with a dramatic ‘whew!’ There was a small silence in the wake of Scar’s arrival, causing the same agony Mumbo was sure Cub experienced when Mumbo smashed his ribs.

“Guess he told you,” Mumbo muttered, resigned to this outcome. Cub would tell Scar, Scar would push for more answers, and eventually the whole damn server would know something was wrong, not that they could do anything about it. Mumbo would not leave. Not until his shadow had its way.

“Cub told me you were really upset, yeah. Said he didn’t know why,” Scar shrugged, “Told me he thought you needed a friend. So here I am.”

“Ah,” Mumbo couldn’t even manage the noise without his voice slipping in a soft crack. Scar stepped toward the bed where Mumbo was curled up, moving to take his hand, then letting it go when Mumbo flinched.

“Tell me what’s on your mind,” Scar said, so impossibly gentle, and while Mumbo most certainly would not, he didn’t want to say nothing; he didn’t think he could just say nothing, it was too much.

“I think I’m- I’m very ill. I’m having a- a crisis, I think. Mentally. I’m not well. I’m really not well.”

Scar hummed, low and thoughtful, “Want a hug? I could lay down with you, no need to sit up.”

“I don’t want to face you.”

“That’s not a problem.”

“I-Okay. I’m just. I’m just going to stay here. I’m just going to stay here.”

Mumbo felt the bed dip beside him, Scar muttering a soft, “Alright,” before sliding in and holding him in a gentle spoon. It was nice feeling Scar behind him, warm even through the blanket that separated them. Slowly, Mumbo let that heat consume him, felt his heart rate slow. And then out of nowhere it seemed, wretchedly, he started to sob. It was not unusual for Mumbo to cry, though most of his grief was saved for the end of worlds, the friends he’d never see again. So much of his focus was dedicated to staying in the moment, distracting himself, putting one foot in front of the other; stopping to sob was a waste of energy, a waste of resolve. It was giving up. And Mumbo was aware of what was coming, he knew it, but in each new world acceptance came later, the moment where the gravity of his soon-to-end life hit him harder each time, and today, it was hitting now. He could delude himself all he wanted that he’d hold on until the end of the season, but he knew he wouldn’t make it. He would hardly be able to stand more than a month of this. It was over. Maybe it’d be better to bite the bullet now. Stop drawing out his own suffering and deal with the hurt after it was done.

How selfish was that, with Scar at his back. With monstrous effort, he ground down the thought that this would be the ideal way to do it; turning around and tearing through Scar’s chest, disabling any means of fighting back, then taking his damned time. Mumbo cried harder when Scar followed his arm down to his hand, rubbing circles with his thumb into the back.

He would wait.

“Please tell Cub to leave me alone. I don’t know what he wants, I don’t care, I just don’t want to see him anymore. For the rest of the season, I don’t want to see him.”

“He wants you to eat him.”

Mumbo stiffened, a short, strangled sound crawling from his throat, but Scar shushed him gently, holding Mumbo’s hand tighter in turn.

“Just listen, lay here with me and listen before you freak out, alright?” Scar's voice was little more than a whisper, gentle force at Mumbo’s side serving to keep him still and as calm as he could stand to be.

“Why?” Mumbo croaked out, and felt Scar gesture vaguely with his head.

“He’s worried, mostly. He gets in his head about things, and he’s trying to solve them but he- well, he’s not the most tactful guy sometimes. I think he got scared when he saw you at the start of season ten; the last time he’d really seen you was after your break when you looked really bad.. He’s worried things are going to escalate to the point they did before, so he’s uh.. decided he’s gonna fix it. With cannibalism. When he’s talking about it to me it makes a lot of sense, but uh.. I mean, I guess it’s a little out there..”

“How do I make him stop. You have to- Scar, please make him stop.” Mumbo felt himself quivering in Scar’s hold, be it from fear or anger, he did not know.

“Oh, he won’t take it from me. I mean, he would if I was the guy he was trying to convince to eat other people, but he doesn’t always take secondhand advice like that. In this case, he’s way too zeroed in. You have to do it.”

“Well- fine. I’ll do it then, I’ll do it right now-“ Mumbo wriggled in Scar’s grip, but he held fast.

“Wait a minute- Not like that, no, not like that.” Scar almost laughed, but there was a little more stress there than anything.

“Not like what?” Mumbo huffed, annoyed. He pushed one last struggle, but gave in when Scar didn’t let go.

“You’ve got to be straight with Cub, you’ll put him off if you go about this too.. emotionally charged, let’s say. I’ll tell you exactly how to do it, I want to help you, Mumbo.”

Mumbo took a breath, then forced himself to relax, “Okay. Tell me. Please.”

Mumbo felt Scar straighten up behind him, then clear his throat, like he was about to address a crowd. “First, you gotta be as close to emotionless as you can make yourself. Fire up the coldest, deadest soul you can manage, and talk to him like you’ve just found out a close friend from like ten years ago got really sick, like really sick, terminal, and you don’t really know what to do, but the messenger of the news is looking awkward so you tell them it’s okay, it’s fine, but you don’t really feel fine, you know, your old friend is-“

“I understand, Scar,” Mumbo said, stuck between annoyance and a soft pang of amusement.

“Oh- alright,” Scar sounded a little embarrassed, but not offended, “Well I say that because Cub doesn’t- I know he doesn’t do this on purpose, and he’d probably be hurt if I said this to him so please don’t say anything, but he tends to take you less seriously when you approach him in an emotional kind of way. He really doesn’t mean to, he just gets a little confused I think, frustrated maybe. He doesn’t get it, is what I mean. He’s extremely bad at getting it. He’s sympathetic, but if you approach him and you’re emotional about it he’ll start thinking he knows better than you, in a ‘I’m just gonna take care of it for you,’ kinda way, which is completely infuriating, believe me, I know.”

“Are.. Are you guys okay?”

“Ah!” Scar jumped as if Mumbo had tazed him, “No no no! I’m just trying to explain it to you. I love Cub, he’s great, he’s the best. Literally. He’s just kind of an asshole sometimes. And he knows that, he doesn’t like being an asshole, so he listens when you tell him how it is.”

“Okay.. Then I’ll tell him I’m not going to eat him. And to stop bothering me.”

“No you won’t.”

Mumbo made a face, then gave in, “Okay. What will I tell him then.”

“You gotta tell him how he’s acting, right? You can’t tell him how what he’s doing makes you feel because he does not care, and he’ll probably tell you that, because when he’s made his mind up about something he seriously does not give a fuck unless you reach into his brain and shake it around a little. You gotta really take him by the temples and just shake.” Scar shook Mumbo a little for emphasis, Mumbo half fighting half chuckling as Scar dissolved into giggles.

“So I tell him that he’s being a prick and he should snap out of it before I get other people involved,” Mumbo sighed harshly, “Honestly, I shouldn’t even bother. I’ll just tell Grian. He’ll take care of it.”

“No, no,” Scar laughed, but it was a more nervous sound, like he knew just how serious Grian would take a matter like this, “That first bit is perfect. If you tell him that like you’re really serious- approach him first too, don’t wait for him to come to you- it’ll stop him right in his tracks. If that doesn’t work, call me. You don’t have to threaten him or anything, just make him see he’s not going about his business in the right way. I don’t do much more than tell him he’s being an asshole and he backs down. It’s magic.”

“Well- Okay. But I’m going to Grian if this doesn’t work.” Mumbo started to get up, but stopped when Scar squeezed his hand.

“Wait until tomorrow,” he said, quiet, “It’ll be better for you. Stay, rest today.” Even quieter still, he continued, “I’m sorry you’re going through something, Mumbo. If you ever want to get into the weeds I’m here, and you know Grian will be up and arms for you at the drop of a hat. It doesn’t.. It doesn’t matter what it is. To me especially, you have to know it doesn’t matter,” and with a small laugh, he said, “You could tell me you wanted to saw my head off with just your nails and I’d probably go yikes! I don’t think I’ll be very alive before you finish with the decapitation, but I'm free all day Wednesday, so we can give it a shot!”

“I’ll wait,” was all Mumbo could say. He hoped Scar would let it go now, but less than a minute later, he was speaking again.

“I just hope you know Cub’s got good intentions. He’s not trying to hurt you. I know it doesn’t always feel like that, especially when he can look you in the eyes and disregard your feelings because he’s more convinced he’s helping than he sees he’s upsetting you. I.. I’m also worried about you, if I’m being honest. It doesn’t take me finding you curled up in bed to know you haven’t been in the best shape lately. I don’t know the best way to go about this, Mumbo, and I don’t think- I don’t know if Cub.. I don’t always think he has the best way of going about things, but I understand where he’s coming from. I understand why. I know it’s difficult to extend him the kind of patience that you would for a closer friend, but please try. All of the hermits care about you, even the ones you don’t know well. We want to see you doing well.”

“I don’t want to talk anymore, Scar.”

Scar was quiet for a long moment. “Okay.”

…

Mumbo found Cub at the permit office where Scar told him Cub would probably be most consistently at least some part of the day. The idea of doing this in the permit office was most comforting for Mumbo, for the slim chance that Grian might also be there, might come up to Cub’s office and save him from the agony of this confrontation, though, the more logical part of Mumbo’s brain said that Grian was the wrong kind of person to convince Cub of anything. It was probably a good thing he never came in to work.

Mumbo had never been to the permit office before, but he couldn’t find an entrance, so grimacing, he poked a hole in the wall, replacing the blocks as he went. He climbed up the stairs with some issue (everything here seemed to be cluttered and difficult to find), then stopped before coming to the third floor, hesitating.

“Cub?” he called, feeling exceedingly stupid.

“Mumbo?” Cub nearly squawked, more than surprised, but this gave Mumbo some confidence, climbing the stairs to Cub’s office.

“Hello,” Mumbo said coolly, finding the even tone much easier to achieve now that he was face to face with Cub. Cub straightened his posture, and Mumbo, pleased to have gotten his attention, continued, “You’re being a prick.”

Cub blinked, then again a few times, but his expression stayed mostly the same. “Okay.”

“Yeah. Okay.”

“Yes.” Cub tapped his nails on his desk, looking thoughtful.

“I’d like to know what you’re going to do about it. Because if things continue the way they’re going, I’m going to have Grian get involved, and that would be a mighty pain in your ass.”

Cub nodded like this made perfect sense, “I think that’s fair. I do not want that. How about you sit down, Mumbo.”

“I’d rather not.”

“That’s fine. Regardless, I’d like to have a conversation about this so we can work out what we’re going to do next.”

“I already know what’s going to happen here, Cub. You’re going to leave me alone, cut complete contact, or I’m getting other hermits involved. That’s where this is going.”

“I would appreciate it if we could talk first, because as much as I’m sure you have plenty of words to say about me, I have a few things to say of my own, and I think it’s only reasonable that I speak my peace before you call in the dogs. You can hear exactly what I want from my own mouth and decide for yourself how you’d like to move forward when I’m done.” Cub closed his eyes, then opened them a moment later, “Because it doesn’t matter if you pit the entire server against me, I’m a damn stubborn cunt in the face of the kind of adversity you’re threatening, and the easy way out is here, at my desk. If you sit here and listen to everything I have to say and still want out, then I will leave you alone.” Cub eyed his own chair distastefully, getting up and maneuvering to sit with his legs crossed on his desk instead. He brushed away the few papers and knickknacks he kept, pushing them onto the now empty chair. “My desk chair is meant to sit higher than the one where a client would sit, but that’s all roleplay, let’s ditch the nonsense.”

Mumbo frowned. He considered calling Scar, but that wouldn’t help him here. He sighed. For the peace of mind of never having to deal with Cub again, this seemed a small price to pay. Mumbo climbed onto Cub’s desk, awkward with his long legs.

“Okay. Speak then.”

“I’ll only leave you alone if you listen to everything I have to say, got it?”

“Just get on with it, Cub.”

Cub rolled his shoulders, seeming quite content with taking his time. And then Cub’s eyes narrowed, throwing Mumbo a look so fiercely knowing that Mumbo felt it pierce straight through his bleeding heart.

“Let me start with what I don’t care about, because as far as shit like this goes, I prefer to lay it all out on the table. When it comes to the hobbies of this server’s inhabitants, slowly torturing, dismembering, and eventual eating alive of animals is pretty low of my list of Things That Make Me Feel Good but ultimately high on my list of Things I Don’t Really Give A Fuck About, and given everything I know about you, Mumbo, I don’t think you’re psychotic, I think you probably have a pretty good reason to do those things you do thousands of blocks out from spawn. And before you start squabbling at me, I found out in season eight, Scar knows because I told him, and I’m 99% sure Grian knows, but he never told me so and I haven’t directly asked him. I’m willing to bet he’s known since season six though, probably weeks within the first day he met you. If anyone else knows, I haven’t been told about it.”

Mumbo covered his gaping mouth with a quivering hand. He didn’t know what to do or what to say. Part of him wanted to lunge forward and silence Cub, but that wouldn’t stop him. It wouldn’t keep him from coming back. Cub did not look sympathetic. If anything, he looked angry.

“What do you need, Mumbo.” It wasn’t a question.

Mumbo didn’t answer.

“What do you need. What do you need? Why are you hiding it? What’s the damn point? If you need to eat, Mumbo, fucking eat, wasting away isn’t doing anything or anyone, especially not you.”

“It’s not about me.”

“Is it not?” Cub asked snidely, whatever neutral patience he’d been holding onto before evaporating, “What, you don’t want to hurt anyone? Are you a monster, Mumbo, because you have a little thirst for human blood? Join the fucking club! I can not for the life of me figure out what’s going on in your head- Do you think you’re better than the rest of us? Don’t want to stoop so low? What’s your damn problem! More than half of the server would lay themselves out on a platter for you on a whim of cannibalism related curiosity! Forget it if you need to eat people to survive; even the hermits you haven’t spoken to in months would cut themselves open for you! Have you opened your eyes in the past ten years? We’re all fucking deranged!”

“Shut the fuck up.” Mumbo felt the coolness come easy to him, encompassing him like black tar, “You’re making an ass out of yourself, jumping to conclusions like you can read minds.”

“You don’t give anyone much of a choice but to speculate.”

“Then I’ll lay it out for you,” Mumbo felt the rumble of a growl in his throat, expecting Cub to bite back, but he did not, silent, waiting. “Eating is not a matter of meat, not for me. Meat in the final step, but alone it is nothing, just a conduit. I need terror. I need hopelessness, despair, the kind that builds over years and years of terrorizing and watching your back and holding tightly to the things you love because you don’t know how much longer you can stand to stay, to hold them. Trying every avenue of escape, but it’s never enough. Drawing it out, leaving you alone just long enough that you think it might be safe, you think it might be over, but it’s never over. The only thing you can do is leave everything behind, find a new world, and hope to whatever higher power you believe in that I don’t follow. This isn’t as simple as asking for permission, Cub. When I finally decide it’s over, this world will end. You can not convince an animal otherwise. Animals only want to eat, grow, feel full. I will never be full. I don’t think I can be full. I can escape to sentience for a little while, spite that animal inside me, starve, but I have a feeling I’m only allowed to do so because it makes the upcoming meal that much sweeter. Betrayal, fear, hurt. To answer your questions, that’s what I need. You can tell the whole server, and it will not change the outcome. You can’t get rid of me. I won’t stop until Hermitcraft and all the history of its seasons, held in this one server, is completely abandoned.”

Cub was quiet for a long few moments after Mumbo was done, thinking, considering. “Right,” he said, almost like he didn’t believe him, the carelessness of that one word enough to make Mumbo want to bite his head right off. “That makes a lot more sense.” Then under his breath, trailing off, “..a little dramatic, but..”

“Does it.” Mumbo seethed, though part of him didn’t even know why. The callousness, the disregard- maybe he was angry that Cub wasn’t afraid because it made for a worse build up, a modicum less satisfying in the end. Maybe he was angry because Cub didn’t seem to care, and he should.

“What are you? Never heard of anything like that.” Again Cub continued casually, and despite Mumbo’s seething, his anger eased slightly at the question, reasonable enough.

“I don’t have a name. Over the years victims pass rumors of my existence around, but I’m hardly widespread enough to surpass the standard obscurity in worlds of temporary horrors. As far as I know I’m the only one of my kind,” Mumbo paused, shrugging, “Guess that’s not super likely though.”

“How old are you? You look like you’re in your twenties, maybe early thirties.”

“I don’t know. I tend to match the age of the people around me. It’s not a conscious effort.” Mumbo’s anger was starting to fade, replaced instead by a deep confusion, possibly a small amount of relief. He had very little idea what was happening here, what Cub was trying to get at, but he’d never been able to.. talk about this. Ever. Even his shadow didn’t seem to know how to feel, the both of them side eyeing each other from their places on Cub’s desk.

“Oh, I don’t mean now. I mean like- forever. In total, since you were born, or.. whatever created you.”

“I don’t remember when I started to exist. Atoms aren’t very concerned with the passage of time, nor are plants and animals. For the majority of my existence I did not count the years. Even now, I don’t count them like people do. I only want to know how long I can hold my sentience before it’s gone again.”

“Ah. So like. Really old. Really really old. Wow. I knew your body could change, I’ve seen it, but you can be different species altogether?”

Mumbo shifted uncomfortably at the idea of having been watched. He could not afford to feel shame for the animals he consumed, but he really didn’t like the idea that multiple hermits may have witnessed what he was doing and not said a word. He was always so careful- even then, if someone was following him, Mumbo was certain he would be able to sense their fear. Maybe he didn’t notice over the screams of jackrabbits. It was entirely too possible. Cub seemed unconcerned about Mumbo’s silence, continuing to ask questions almost like he was speaking to himself, like he didn’t need or want the answers because theorizing was entertaining enough.

“Can I see it? See you change?” Was the question that snapped Mumbo back to reality, the utter stupidity of the words rousing him back to life.

“If you’d like to see me lose my sentience in real time then paint the floor in your blood, sure Cub, whatever you want.”

Cub paused, almost consideringly, like he’d completely missed the sarcasm, “Maybe another time. What about something sentient? Can you do that? Like a vex- Like Scar and I! I mean, I honestly don’t know if the little guys are very sentient, so best not try-“

But Mumbo was already rolling his eyes, resigned to doing circus pony tricks, and the ethereal blue skin that painted Cub and Scar’s vex forms rippled across his own, dark hair curling into streaks of white, small wings fluttering at his back. Without entirely knowing what he was doing, he raised his newly clawed hands in a playful splay, hissing for emphasis, then let the whole change ripple away, returning to his human form. Cub looked spellbound, and the attention felt dangerous, appealing to Mumbo far more than he thought safe.

“That’s incredible! Oh, Scar would get a real kick out of that! You’ve got to show him!”

“I- It’s really nothing,” Mumbo rubbed the back of his neck, deeply unsure how to feel about this, but certainly mounting in alarm, “I’m not- I’m not showing Scar, I’m not doing that again-“

“Can you turn into other people? Can you look like me?”

“I- Probably? I mean I’m sure I can, I don’t really have limits, but this isn’t something I-“

“Try? Can you try? You don’t have limits? Okay we’ll go back to that later. Can you try?”

“We aren’t- we aren’t going back to anything!” Mumbo squeaked in his distress, but Cub was so genuinely interested, so genuinely impressed that Mumbo didn’t- he’d never experienced something like this before. So he gave in and tried, though, ‘tried’ implies there was any effort at all when in reality it was quite easy, basically second nature, until the change was complete and his mind seemed to double over on itself, the same but entirely different, thinking his thoughts but in completely different ways, stalling Mumbo where he sat, paralyzed by the horrors of a new inner working. Almost immediately he changed back, heaving shallow breaths as his mind caught up with the speed of his thoughts.

“Whoa- That was- Are you okay?” Cub stopped in his tracks, apparently failing to notice the internal explosion that occurred in Mumbo’s head.

“I am never doing that again.”

“What-“

“Your brain is awful,” Mumbo heaved, and Cub blinked, and Mumbo knew exactly what was happening, that Cub was processing, everything inside of him sluggish and those pauses, all those times he paused between sentences, it made sense now.

“You copied my body and mind?” Cub breathed, and Mumbo was still reeling so hard from the momentary terror of being in Cub’s head that he could not respond, “That’s- I mean maybe I should have guessed that might happen if you’re changing completely, but- I don’t know! I wonder why you reacted so badly if you were just me, because I wouldn’t have cared, I’ve lived here all my life. Maybe you keep part of your own head? The internal dialogue? Oh- Maybe you didn’t get my whole brain, you just got all the mental illness. In that case, I am very sorry. I bet you’d inherit physical problems too, the ones that don’t get fixed by respawns. Scar’s sickness, for example. Wow. That is really cool. I’ve never needed to cut someone open so badly in my entire life. Can I study you? I’m asking but I really don’t want to be asking. I know I said I wouldn’t pester you after this was over but I have way too many questions.” Mumbo was honestly shocked Cub could talk so fast in a brain like that, but then again, he hadn’t stuck around to find out the complexities. Maybe it only sounded fast because Mumbo’s own head was fried.

“Okay, so how do we kill you?”

Mumbo blinked up at that. “What?”

“If you go crazy, how do we kill you? Stop you, whatever.”

“Okay- one. This isn’t about ‘if’s’ so don’t get in your head about it. And you can’t stop me either, that’s not how this works. I don’t just die.”

“You can die perfectly well right now,” Cub pointed out, unconcerned.

“Well- sure. But it doesn’t matter if you kill me or not in any form, I don’t stay dead.”

“That’s fine,” Cub said, tapping his fingers impatiently on his legs, “Just tell me how. When you were hunting all those pigs you didn’t look like you got hurt or even bled.”

Mumbo huffed, impatient himself, “Well if you want to kill me, you’d better do it instantly. I don’t sustain any injuries if I don’t want to, the skin heals over as soon as whatever’s hit me is gone.”

“So if I wanted to keep you somewhere, I’d impale you. Get you in the head or heart, or maybe not some place lethal.”

“You can’t keep me anywhere, I’ll just change.”

“Ah, right. Then I’ll have to convince you not to somehow. How do you feel about peoples’ suffering if you’re not the one inflicting it? Can you tell the difference between a real scream and a fake one?” Cub talked casually like this was a simple matter of problem solving, far too animated, almost like it was fun.

“I- I don’t know, Cub, but I don’t think this is a very productive line of thought.”

“Why not? I mean, I’ll have years I’m sure to experiment on my own, but while you’re here and talking to me I think I should take advantage, don’t you?”

“You can’t stop me!” Mumbo nearly shouted in his distress, though Cub remained unperturbed.

“Is this Mumbo Jumbo the sentient human talking or Mumbo Jumbo the flesh eating terror, because if I may, you’re sounding suspiciously like the flesh eating terror.”

“You- You have no idea what you’re dealing with. This isn’t something you can stop or fight, Cub, I’ve lived hundreds of lives and worlds where everyone I’ve ever befriended has-“

“I’m gonna stop you right there,” Cub interrupted him, “I don’t care. However, maybe you’re right that prepping for the worst case scenario isn’t a great use of our time because who knows how much you’ve got left. Let’s see what we can do to extend it first, yeah? If we can do that indefinitely, then there’s no problem!”

“I’ve already tried everything, Cub-“

“Have you tried cannibalism?”

“No, but-“

“Then you have not tried everything. What’s your deal? Why are you so against it? I understand your methods are a tad more intense, but who cares. Y’know, I bet this would be more effective against someone who isn’t going to see it coming. Scar is a prime candidate, but Grian would be even better for your purposes.”

Mumbo blanched, reddening in turn as anger brought flush to his face, “I am not going to attack anyone without telling them! What is wrong with you?”

Cub raised an eyebrow, then shrugged, “If you want to maximize the time you have with sentience, you should take advantage of the beginning when no one understands why you’re doing what you’re doing. For the purpose of farming enough suffering to last you, it seemed reasonable, but yeah, probably a little extreme. Still, I think you’re going to have to ease up on the ethics here if we’re going to figure something out.”

“I’m not- No, Cub. I’m telling you no.”

“Why?” It was Cub’s turn to be frustrated, scowling as he rolled his eyes.

“Because I would feel bad!”

Cub nearly hissed, throwing up his arms, “For fuck’s sake! Are we not past that? I thought your whole issue is that you make friends then torture them to death a thousand times before moving on and doing it again. Why do you suddenly have problems now that you have a willing participant?”

“Because I’m sentient, Cub!”

“You’re cowardly is what you are. Get over it.”

“Right, sure, yeah, I’ll just do that.”

“Great!” Cub huffed, “I’m ready then! Go on, paint the floor red or whatever you said about my blood. Get it all over. Give me a reason to be afraid.”

“I can’t. I don’t- You don’t get it. I spend so much time in this body doing my best to make up for everything I’ve done. I’m glad that you don’t seem to have a guilty conscience, but it’s not so easy to know the full weight of the horrors you’ve committed and the pain you will bring again because you can’t stop. What’s the point of spending the rest of my time here inflicting the same kind of suffering I will when I lose my head. You think you can stop it, but you’re wrong. You are wrong. I am past delaying the inevitable. Let me have this. Let me starve. I will do all I can for the server in my last months. I won’t live here just as I would live as a dog. It’s not worth it. It’s not worth inflicting, knowing exactly the harm I’m bringing and wanting more all the same. And that’s in the case that everyone here is magically okay with being stalked and tortured to death until I crack regardless, no, I refuse to believe even you would want to live like that.”

Cub stared at Mumbo for a long moment, searching, though for what Mumbo didn’t know. “You’re guilty,” he mumbled, like this wasn’t obvious, “You think you deserve to starve.”

“Of course,” Mumbo replied, struggling between his own shame and the hot anger simmering below his skin.

“I don’t think so,” he said, like it was just that simple. Mumbo opened his mouth to argue, or maybe just scream, but Cub interrupted him, “Regardless of what you are now, Mumbo, you are not human. You can take the shape of a person, you can do and feel the things that people do, but you are not one, not really. You’re something else. This ‘something’ doesn’t have a name, but you have different needs. You are not a person. Why is it so evil for you to take what you need, Mumbo? I mean, sure, you can’t expect to take what you need from the friends you’ve made and keep those friends all the same, but you are not bad for taking. You are hungry. You are hunting, and you are eating. It’s callous of humanity to consider themselves above this dynamic of the food chain. We are not. Nor are you, most likely. There’s always a bigger fish.”

“It’s not the same. I am far crueler than any animal you can name, and I know better.”

“Do you think dolphins deserve to suffer for hunting fish?”

“Cub, I told you it’s-“

“Many things eat their prey alive,” Cub interrupted coolly, “You found a renewable source of food, one that feels emotions stronger than any other options, comes back to life, and fears you greater each time. You are not a person, Mumbo, you are a predator that hunts people. It doesn’t matter if you ‘know better.’ You need to eat. You need it. Talking ethics, if you want to ease your guilt, you should limit the time you spend interacting with people in the body you’ve made for yourself, but even then, you’re only preparing yourself a better meal. It is not evil. People can hate you for it, but that’s not any different from how a rabbit might hate a fox. It is not any different.”

Mumbo quieted, knowing little of what to say. It was different. It was different because Mumbo hated doing it, he hated having to do it, he hated fighting with himself, and he hated being This. He liked people. He liked being a person, he liked living among them, he liked it all so much more than he liked himself.

“But I don’t want to. I don’t want to need it. I want to stay here, stay human. I want to be human. I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Well,” Cub said, voice softer, sympathetic for the first time since Mumbo had joined him on his desk. “That’s a separate can of worms, isn’t it.”

Mumbo didn’t speak for a long time. He kept his eyes closed. He didn’t want to see Cub. Cub, who was looking at him, looking directly through him.

“I guess so.” The words were so quiet, they hardly passed Mumbo’s lips before they were nothing.

“Well, here’s what I think, Mumbo,” Cub started, the softness dissipating in favor of something calmer, more logical, “I think you have a lot to say about what will or won’t keep you sentient longer, but for someone so confident cannibalism won’t work, you certainly haven’t tried it. So you’re going to try it. See if this can be a temporary possible-solution until we can find a more permanent one. I need time to work this out, and I refuse to let you keep starving yourself out of shame.”

“You- What? You think you can-“

“I don’t think I can do anything,” Cub interrupted, voice hard, “But those woodland mansions have a hell of a lot of books, and I happen to enjoy looking through them. Scar and I are always looking for something to do. So.” Cub looked back at Mumbo from where he was staring out the window, “Are you willing to try? It’s a little cramped in here, so I think it would be better to go somewhere else, somewhere I could run from you, if you like that. Outside might be ideal as well, so we don’t have to clean up so much. We could probably-“

“I- Wait, Cub, please wait,” Mumbo needed to interrupt him, needed to stop him, but when Cub did stop, waiting for Mumbo to continue, he found his mouth dry.

“What.”

“I can’t. Not yet. I’m not ready.”

Cub looked just about ready to kill him, and honestly Mumbo didn’t blame him, but the mental block was still there, he was just so- he didn’t even know, and maybe that was the worst part. He was scared. His limbs were stiff and numb, and even with the shrill screams of desperate starvation in his ears, he couldn’t bring himself to move.

Cub took a long, deep breath, barely holding on to his composure, “Mumbo, if we don’t do something to stall for time-“

“Eat me. Eat me first. Do it all, everything I would do to you, draw it out, make it hurt. I need- I need to know how it feels. I need this.”

Cub paused, eyes narrowed in thought. “I don’t know if that’s a good idea, Mumbo. You don’t need more excuses to back down. I’ve had my fair share of being torn apart, you don’t have to worry about me.”

“I’ll do it. I promise I’ll do it, I’ll eat my whole damn fill if you want me to, Cub, but I need this first. I have to know.” Mumbo had no idea where this had come from; the feverish desperation, but now it was all he could think about, knowing, he had to know, he had to face what he’d done directly, and then he could swallow this pill and move on.

Cub considered him, eyes still narrowed.

“Alright. Fine.” he closed his eyes, inclining his head then opening them with a smile, “We’ll do it in the labyrinth.”

[yuri-is-online]

Seven Plus One Happy Haunts (An 800 Followers Thank You)

"NRC is having a culture festival?" You blurt out, immediately drawing the attention of everyone in your class. Normally this interruption would be met with a swift smack, but the thought doesn't even flicker across Crewel's mind much to the envy of your classmates. Instead, something similar to a stress headache seems to work it's way across his face as he takes a brief pause to breathe.

"I take it the Headmage has neglected to inform you of this?" He says it like a question, but really it sounds more like he is begging you to prove him wrong. "He was supposed to ask your permission."

"Permission for what?!" You try not to sound too panicked but that's difficult when Crewel's normal sternness re-emerges to silence Ace and Deuce's whispers.

"Sit!" He cracks his crop and returns to the black board. "And Yuu, once classes are done for the day, meet me back here. It will be much easier for me to explain things to you and Grim than sending you on a wild crow chase." Oh you don't like the sound of that at all. ~~~~ By the time classes are over, you are drooping under the weight of an entire school's worth of whispers and surprised you remember your way back to your Homeroom.

"Where's Grim?" Crewel asks, though he doesn't sound terribly worried. So it's bad news bad news.

"He decided to ditch me for Ace and Deuce and I didn't have the energy to chase him down, sorry." Your book bag drops with just as dramatic a thunk as you do.

"Let me make you a coffee, you are going to need some." Crewel sighs. "As you might be aware, culture festivals tend to involve things like booths and side show games."

"Typically they're run by the classes or clubs, right?" You aren't really liking where this is going.

"In anime and at normal schools yes. And if this had been any other year that would be the case for us too but someone-" the same tension headache from this morning reappears, "got the bright idea to suggest that we form groups by putting the entire student body into an ai generator of some sort to encourage team work or something like that."

"Oh." No wonder Crewel can't seem to tell the difference between the containers where he keeps the instant coffee packets and the wet wipes. "Are you ok? Is there anything I can do to help?"

"Very sweet of you to offer pup." He lets you take over the coffee and smiles gratefully when he sees you move to make him a tea. "But back to how this effects you, one of those groups got the bright idea to run a Haunted House, and the Headmage suggested they use Ramshackle for 'authenticity's sake' and generously offered them your assistance as well."

"Compared to some of the other things he's done I guess it could be worse?" Not that you are thrilled, your tone makes that clear. "I mean it's a haunted house, it could be fun. What is it you want me to help out with anyway?"

"That's what they've been arguing over." Crewel looks and sounds very, very tired as you finally notice the growing chatter of voices just outside the classroom door that is finally making an entrance alongside a very familiar face.

"I'm telling you, it makes the most sense for Yuu to help me!"

notes: Thank you all so much for 800 followers! Normally I'd run an event but I got a wee bit burnt out with the last one, so please accept this humble Haunted Mansion themed offering~ And feel free to guess who is who, I originally intended this to be a Halloween themed thing so I picked most of the cast members from boys people thought were getting neglected from the SSR pool (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧ Emphasis on most

Haunt 1- Host With the Most: Vil

Haunt 2- Manipulating the Buyers: Rollo

Haunt 3- Life Lines

Haunt 4- Tie the Knot Tango

Haunt 5- Nevermore

Haunt 6- Life Hereafter

Haunt 7- Rest in Peace

Bonus Haunt- ???

Taglist: @nothingfuninthislife

[tipsyon-tea]

Blind Spot - Deleted Scenes - Ch 6

Chapter 6 was excruciating. It was meant to be a chance for the Damon and the MC to open up more, but no matter what I tried I wasn't happy with it. I ended up with endless scenes of them having meaningful conversations in the rain that didn't fit the development of the relationship. Eventually I gave up and let the MC do as she pleased.

Technically spoilers for the main story, but the final draft ended up completely different, so also not. I'd be interested to know from people who've read the main chapter which version they prefer.

♪⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅♪

The rain crashed against the world around them, falling in rivulets off the roof of the pavilion onto leafy garden beds. It was everywhere. Sheets of water lashed the city in rolling waves, leaving the air with a chill unsuited to the summer. 

“Can I see?” Damon spoke quietly, his body angled towards her as they sat side by side on the stone picnic table. His much longer legs were bent towards her, crowding close enough to feel a phantom warmth, but never quite touching. She frowned and curled her obsidian tipped claws between her knees, trying to push back the itch underneath her nails. The tension like a second skin that wanted to twist and shape her bones into something unrecognisable.

 “You want to know what my hands look like,” she said, frowning as she considered it. It wasn't so much what he thought of her abilities—she didn't care about that. If he was repulsed, that made everything easier. The issue was the feeling that she was giving away her advantage. Losing the element of surprise, as irrational as it was. The nervous, uncertain energy continued to radiate off him and he hadn’t looked away once since joining her under the shelter. Her neck prickled under the scrutiny, hairs raised around her nape.

He's not a threat, she had to remind herself. He wasn't about to attack her, though she was less worried about that, and more about the possibility he’d try to make a move. 

“You don't have to show me,” he said, waving his hands. She tried not to twitch at the sudden movement. “I was just curious-” He calmed down enough to fiddle with the ends of his hair instead, glancing to and from, “-since it seems like something you struggle to control.”

She withheld the urge to ask why he was sitting so close to her if he knew that. “It's more present when I'm nervous,” she said instead, curling her fingers inside the pockets around her waist.

“You're nervous?”

That’s not it. Her mouth formed a thin line as she looked over the railing of the pavilion into the rainswept gardens. Nervous was for things you wanted to do well at. This was closer to wariness. Apprehension. “I guess.”

Her skin crawled under his stare, squirming with uncertainty as to what came next. She staunchly avoided looking at him, so she could only draw from her periphery if he made any sort of movement. 

“I'm… nervous as well,” he said softly. 

That didn't help. If anything, the edge of anxiety that radiated off him made it worse. Taking a breath, she tried to ward off the lingering malignance. “You want to see what my hand looks like,” she reiterated, not convinced it was a good idea. He'd been the one to ask though, and she didn't see why she should say no. She should show at least a token of trust. 

Swallowing the lump in her throat, she withdrew the hand closest to him. Turning it over to show him the claws seeped in deep purple. He paused, breath caught in his throat as he stared. Reaching out only to hesitate, and she saw his eyes flicker to her for guidance. Perhaps trying to read the frown on her face. 

“I think they're beautiful,” he said quietly. Like he knew the ice was liable to crack. 

Her fingers twitched, lip curling back, but his hands still hovered. Inches from clasping her own. She managed to keep the change restrained, fingers bleeding darker in colour, but it barely scratched the surface of their actual form. She pressed her lips shut to hide the sharpening teeth.

Nothing about this was pretty, unless he was deluded. Everything was a snarling mix of uncertainty and conflicting instincts, no peace brought by the rain to sooth her. There was no point taking the first step if she despised how it had to end-

He seemed to decide she was okay with it, and both his palms wrapped around the sides of her claws to cradle her hand. They were warm and soft. Shorter than hers—how he didn't fear her she didn't know—but gentle. His thumbs brushed soothingly along the sides, and she had to force the deep breaths through her teeth.

This couldn't be all he wanted.

“I-Is, uhm, is it always this close to the surface?” he spoke again, stumbling more than she expected. She glanced up to see why and actually took in his expression—even through the monochrome shadow of the clouds, she could see the nervous flush of his cheeks. He could be sick or upset or infatuated for all she knew of an expression like that. The idea he could look at her—claws out like she was ready to attack him—and be enamoured seemed the most absurd. 

“It’s more present when I'm nervous,” she said, voice rough. True of most Huevari like her. It was a sign any sane person would take as meaning ‘back off’, but he either had no clue of the threat or chose to ignore it, giving her hand a soft squeeze.

”You don't have to be nervous,” he said, sounding twice as uncertain as she felt. He traced small circles against her palm, which made the hair at the back of her neck stand on end. “I like you and… I want you to know that something like this would never change that.” 

Not the problem- She tried not to bristle, reminding herself the point was to make it work, not send him conflicting messages. The sentiment behind it was nice. Sweet. Probably romantic in any other scenario—except she didn't care what he thought of it. Her concern was everything to do with how far he would push her. 

“What do you mean by ‘like’?”

“Huh-?” He glanced up, reddening under the scrutiny. “C-can you explain that a bit more?” 

“Like, in what… sense.” She frowned, struggling to put the thing that had evaded her this whole time into words. “Whether you meant my personality. Or the idea of dating. Or if you meant you liked how I looked, or a casual sort of thing…” 

Her head spun with thoughts of what his intentions were. What he wanted out of this if she said yes. How he'd feel when he found she had nothing but issues to offer. She probably imagined the way his grip tightened around her palm. 

“I… don't mind answering, but-” Looking up, she was in fact correct. His shadowed eyes seemed darker than usual, gazing down at her with a gravity that seemed more appropriate for the issue he’d been ignoring. “Please, can you just-” He struggled for what to say, holding her hand tighter between his own. “Tell me what it is you're thinking first? Anything? I want to know if I'm doing this right.”

Her mouth opened, then shut again as she tried to pin down anything that would actually make sense. “Give me a moment,” she said, taking a deep breath in. Out of interest, she tugged her hand back, wondering if he’d let go. His grip only tightened, far more noticeably than it had before. Making it clear he was keeping it in his grasp. 

She found she didn't mind. The rain drummed against the tiles of the pavilion, filling the silence with the patter of water against leafy fronds. She could sense his agitation growing as her non-response stretched, but he remained dutifully silent. Which was arguably worse than if he interrupted her. 

“I guess, I…” She spoke, simply to ease herself into it. His thumbs pressed into her palm to hold it in place, and she let her fingers curl over, the sharpened edge of her nails grazing against his much softer flesh. “I have a lot of thoughts. Too many. They keep assassinating each other over which one gets to go first.”

“Take your time,” he said softly, and her tentative grin fell as he ignored her attempt at injecting some humour. Her gaze flickered from their hands to the fabric covering his chest, wondering how many shapes would be in one diagonal row across his shirt, and what was wrong with her to take this long over a single question. 

“You asked what I’m thinking. Right.” She needed to take a breath to recover her thoughts, eyes shifting several different places as she turned the words over in her mouth. “I just- I guess I don’t know what you want out of this. What it is you like about me, your idea of dating. If you just liked how I looked, or if this is a more casual sort of thing…” 

She risked looking up to see his expression, surprised when she saw his frown had disappeared completely. He stared down at his lap with wide eyes instead, taking a moment to digest his own thoughts. 

“I see… I suppose you're right. I wasn't very clear.” He glanced up at her, this time with a softer smile. Moving slowly, he tugged her hand closer towards him. 

She stiffened, her other claws scraping grooves in the stone table when he brought her captured hand up to his face, staring at her over the top of her serrated fingers. 

“I like everything about you,” he said, his breath warm against her skin as his eyes creased up with the smile their hands hid. “The more I discover, the more I like. And as for dating…” He looked bashful for a moment, glancing away. “It’s uhm, definitely not casual. What I want is the opposite of that.”

Vague, again. 

But if he was looking for something serious, that was a start at least. She felt her stomach was all twisted in knots with the turn their conversation had taken. Tense in a way that wasn't entirely bad, but it didn't help her with fighting back the claws on her fingers. 

“Right,” she said. He looked at her with wide, imploring eyes as he tightened his grip around her hand, like his whole world would fall apart depending on what she said next. “I guess, the ‘opposite of casual’ fits pretty well for me too.” 

She managed a strained laugh, and this time he laughed along, the sound of it soft against the lessening rain. She glanced out across the gardens to see the onslaught had eased to a steady patter.

♪⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅♪

[obsessivestar]

'What If It's All A RomCom?' - a Ted Nivison x Reader

{{-I'm back! Thank you so much for your patience, I'm doing a lot better and I've got a lot of ideas stirring up in my brain. Hopefully this is the last hiatus I need to take. Y'all are an amazing community and I'm glad to be a part of it ♡-}}

//General Warnings: 18+ Fix (MINORS DNI), Reader is implied to be afab and under 5'5.

Chapter Warnings: Flirting, maybe angst? Hmmm\\

Word Count: 3.8k

☆▪︎▪︎▪︎Taglist!▪︎▪︎▪︎☆

@k-k0129 , @callsign-scully & @limecorpse

☆Love Ya To Death!☆

Chapter 16: Guess (Guess)

As usual, I find myself waking up pressed against Ted's chest, both of my arms loosely wrapped around his bare body. I already know he's awake, I can feel his fingers running little patterns on my back. Before I let him know I'm up, I concentrate on his touch, trying to see if I can guess what the shape is. I feel his chest hair tickling my cheek a little, our legs intertwined under the covers, his weight shifted a little so he wasn't crushing my left arm. Little hearts. He's drawing little hearts on my back. This guy....

"Wakey wakey..." Ted whispers to me in a sing-song tone, making the little hearts he's trailing on my back a little bigger to get more of my attention. Either he's been urging me to wake up little by little, or he's already aware I'm awake. God, he's the sweetest. I can't believe there was a time where I wasn't waking up in his arms. I don't think I ever wanna go back to waking up alone...

"For real, though, we gotta be downstairs in like...15 minutes.." Ted clears his tone, using the full palm of his hand to rub my back up and down, urging me more to wake up. I can't help but let out a little laugh, pulling back from his chest slightly so I can look up at him, taking in his handsome features while I still can.

"What, we can't--" My sentence is cut off by my own voice cracking, my throat dry as ever. An amused chuckle leaves Ted, stretching away from me for a moment to grab his water bottle, returning to my side after to hand it to me.

"Mine was bad when I woke up, too.." Ted spoke with a smile, watching as I take his water from him to take a good, long sip. I can hear Ted let out another low chuckle as I drink up over half of his water before finally pulling back with a heavy exhale. Fuck, I didn't realize I was so thirsty until now. I guess I should've had more to drink last night. I give Ted a thankful smile as I hand his water bottle back to him, watching him set it aside again before facing me once more, both of us now sitting up a bit in his bed.

"There, you were sayin'?.." Ted gestures to me with a smirk. I can tell he's amused with all of this, not just from the water, but from me being in his room. It's a nice change. He looks proud, he looks confident. Honestly, his mattress feels better than mine, though I'm probably only feeling this way because he's in it, for once.

"I was going to say 'we can't lay together for a bit?' but I think I can guess why.." I admit with a smile, adjusting myself so I wasn't pushing all of my weight down on my elbow.

"Oh, you can guess, huh?" Ted raises a curious brow at me, his confident smirk still spread along his blush toned lips.

"Yeah, I've got a good guess.." I return with a confident, but flirty tone, smiling back at him.

"Go on then. Guess."

"Yeah? You want me to?"

"Yeah. Guess."

"You turned our alarms off again, didn't you?"

"I absolutely did."

My guess being correct makes me lean my head back and laugh, adjusting myself so it was now my hand holding me up, pressing down on Ted's mattress. "Why?!" I laugh in disbelief, playfully furrowing my brows at Ted. "Why do you keep doing that?? We have a job to do, Teddy!"

"I-I like you gettin' your beauty sleep, babe!" Ted raises his hands defensively with a devilish little grin, shrugging slightly. "Ya needed the rest! I could tell!"

"I don't need beauty--why do you call me babe now?"

"I've called you babe before, why are you surprised?" Ted tilts his head a little and narrows his eyes. "You've got that babe vibe, I was thinkin' about it earlier. You've got the 'tude of a babe."

"The tude? Like the attitude?"

"Yeah."

"The attitude of a babe?"

"Yeah!"

"I thought I was a princess?"

"You can be both."

"I get 2 pet names now?"

"Yeah, you can have many names. Babe, Princess, pain in my ass, kindofalittlewhoorreee..." Ted purrs.

I playfully roll my eyes as Ted lists off some 'pet names', watching him leaning in slightly. I can't help but shake my head a little, a huff leaving me as my eyes meet Ted's once more. "Yknow, I was perfectly fine before you corrupted me.." I speak, loosely crossing my arms in front of my chest, still completely bare from last night.

"Corrupted you? What?" Ted narrowes his eyes again at me, lightly gliding his tongue along the ends of his top teeth. "What does that mean?"

"Before you made me this way, this--this--I.." I try to find the right words, but my mind immediately blanks out once Ted moves in a little closer, the tip of his nose lightly brushing against mine. It's like his every move is sucking the words out of my head. He knows it, too. He's got that stupid smile on his face again. He knows what he does to me.

"Wow, I really get you goin'.." Ted purrs, lowering his voice a little on purpose. I roll my eyes again, lightly frustrated at how effortlessly he makes me breathless.

"Stop trying to seduce me for like 5 seconds, I'm trying to compliment you." I let out a breathy chuckle as I speak, fixing up my hair a little.

"Can't help it, you're just really easy to seduce now.." Ted gives a casual shrug, his gaze flicking down to my lips as he speaks. "Now I can kiss ya whenever I want, it's hard."

"Kissing me's hard?"

"Not kissin' you's hard."

Ted gives me a small peck on the lips and gives me a little smile. I see a longing sparkle appear in his dark eyes as he meets my gaze once more before flicking down to my lips again. I can read him clearly. He wants more. He always wants a little more...

Ted's hand rests on my cheek as he leans in to properly connect our lips in a warm, wanting kiss. I return the kiss, allowing our lips to move together slowly, intimately. I feel lighter, I feel like we've risen up above the clouds, our lips cupping one another, hugging, enjoying, keeping us above the rest of the world. I feel like this everytime we kiss, everytime he gives me exactly what I'm longing for; what I'm thinking about. Nothing else compares. Not even pot comes close to getting me as high as Ted does. It's maddening. He's maddening. I'm sure I have the same effect on him.

"Told ya.." Ted breaks the kiss briefly to speak, a dry snicker bubbling out of his throat when I reach to place my free hand on his bare shoulder, moving in a little to lose myself in his embrace once more, until we're inevitably interrupted yet again...

I'm suddenly reminded of where we're supposed to be when I hear Joe and Tanner speaking to each other out in the hall, their conversation becoming quieter as they move downstairs for the day. Their voices cause me to break away from the kiss completely, my gaze going over to Ted's closed door. I keep forgetting that there are other people sleeping here every night. I'm sure Joe would've complained if anyone's actually heard Ted and I by now, but still, it makes me feel weird. I feel bad.

"Well, there it is.." Ted smirks, pulling away from me to move out of bed for the day. He grabs a pair of boxers for himself first before he tosses my pajamas over to me one by one. "Duty calls, princess.."

A bashful chuckle escapes me, moving my body to sit at the edge of Ted's bed so I could properly get dressed. I'm gonna have to go right into my room to change into something else, but I'm not takin' that walk naked. "Y'know, I'm starting to think we should slow down a little.." I admit with a shy smile, standing up off the bed as I slip my pajama pants back up.

"Slow down?" Ted repeats, his confidence wavering ever so slightly. "If this is about last night, I did offer my face.."

I stop and look at Ted, furrowing my brows. His face? What is he talking about? Last night we--

Oh.

"Wha--oh my god, no--" I sound completely embarrassed. I am embarrassed--

Right.

"I'm saying slow down because there's other people that sleep here every night, not because you didn't eat me out last night." I laugh a little, moving over to stand by him.

"M'kay, I was about to say.." Ted chuckles lightly, flicking his tongue side to side in his mouth as he looks at me. I could never get tired of the way he looks at me after we wake up together. It's like he's admiring his work while planning the next project. Is he always thinking about sex? Well, he is a guy...

"Are you still freakin' out over us leavin' the window open?" Ted asks, gesturing over to the window by his bed. Fuck, I had almost forgotten about that.

"I wasn't until now, thanks for the reminder." Another breathy chuckle leaves me and I put my hand on my hips, my gaze going to Ted's closed door again. I start to think of responses or excuses I could give out if Tanner, Joe or Dan start asking questions. No way am I gonna tell the complete truth.

'Oh don't worry about it, Ted and I were only smoking weed and fucking in his bedroom, just the exact thing you don't want us doing, nothing to fucking worry about there.'

I guess this is the part where I proclaim that it's all for love, but realistically I think I'm just a horrible friend. Sorry, Tanner.

"Guess we'll have to find other places, huh?" Ted speaks up to snap me out of my thoughts, nibbling a little on his lower lip. Oh god, I don't even wanna unpack what that could possibly mean right now, I gotta go get dressed. Still, I can't help but smile. Being with this man is so thrilling. I place both of my hands on Ted's chest and lean up to give a gentle kiss on his lips, grinning softly up at him.

"Get dressed, Theo.." I hum pleasantly, patting his bare chest a little before pulling away completely to exit his room, smiling like a big, proud idiot to myself. I hear Ted chuckle to himself as I close his door.

It doesn't take long for me to change into new clothes and do my usual morning routine, minus doing my makeup, we got a team for that after all. I'm out of my room in about 5 minutes, getting downstairs just in time to watch some of the team clearing out more of the living room. More ballroom dance training, probably. It's the biggest scene of the film, after all. It's gotta be perfect, or close enough.

Dan's helping some of the crew move some of the furniture outside while Tanner and Joe are in the living room with some breakfast and coffee. I watch their reactions closely when they spot me, they don't seem...uncomfortable or anything, though I'd be surprised if Tanner specifically heard anything, his A/C would've tuned out any noises, I'm sure. It's Joe I'm worried about. I walk up to them as they happily beckon me over. They seem eager to talk to me, it must be about the film.

"Hey, there's my favorite lead!" Tanner points at me, a genuine smile lifting his chubbier cheeks. I can instantly confirm that he knows absolutely nothing about last night. Good.

"Good morning.." I give a small smile, moving around Tanner to grab myself a bagel to put in the toaster. I might even make myself a coffee later, I feel a little tired now that I'm out of that room and among other people. "How's everyone feeling?"

"Pretty good. I'm actually getting used to these mattresses." Tanner admits, moving back a bit to give me some room on the kitchen counter. "Slept pretty well."

"Of course you're sleeping well, you've been sleeping on an actual bed 'the last week.." Joe smirks at Tanner, crossing his arms.

"I sleep in a bed otherwise." Tanner adds back, his tone dipped in amusement.

"You sleep on a futon that you've never actually spread out, you just keep it as a couch." Joe spreads his arms as he replies. "You literally sleep on a couch."

"It's a good couch."

"It's older than you are."

"It's reliable."

I'm definitely entertained, but I decide to interject. "I'm surprised you two didn't get married.." I speak up, moving around Joe to grab a plate from the top cupboards. "You bicker every morning.."

"At least we're bickering about couches this time." Tanner replies with a shrug.

"Yeah, we could go back to clitoris-es again." Joe adds with a humorous smirk, sweeping his hand through his mullet.

"Man, that reminds me, I can't believe it's been over a week already." Tanner spesks genuinely, turning his head to look at Joe. "We've been here for over a week.."

How does that remind Tanner of?--y'know what, not even gonna think about it. Tanner's Tanner.

"And we're basically almost done, right?" I ask, moving around the kitchen as the conversation continues. "Did you book us for 3 weeks just in case, or?.."

"Yeah, we're basically halfway done, technically. We're already over halfway done filming." Tanner admits, pulling out his phone to go over his notes.

"We've filmed all of the scenes with the extras during the first 4 days, we've filmed three out of the seven kiss scenes, we've filmed all of the establishing shots, we got the conflict scenes out of the way...it's honestly just a few more scenes and then the dream sequence and then we're done."

Wow, that was wild to think about. We've really been at it for the first week. I remember first walking into this place with Tanner like it was yesterday. I hadn't even noticed Ted until Conner had canceled on us. I mean sure, I met Ted, but I hadn't really noticed him. That's so strange. That's so strange to think about.

"Damn.." Joe speaks up, basically summarizing my thoughts aloud. "I'm proud of you, Tanner. You've worked hard on this."

"Awe, thanks Joe." Tanner's touched by Joe's compliment, setting his phone down on the counter behind him.

"Yeah honestly, I'm proud too man." I speak up as I take my bagels out of the toaster, smiling back at Tanner briefly. "I'm happy you let me be a part this. I love working with you guys."

"Thanks, (Y/N).." Tanner smiles at me as well, giving a little nod of agreement. "It's been so fun, I can't wait for you guys to see the final product. Everything's been literally perfect."

"I mean, it has me in it, it's gonna be perfect." Ted speaks as he comes down the stairs, now sporting a plain white shirt with a comfortable, multi-colored cardigan and some basic blue jeans. I have no idea how he can wear so many layers in California. I guess he's been here long enough to be comfortable with the heat.

"Hey! There's my other favorite lead!" Tanner points out at Ted as he approaches the kitchen, slipping his hands into his jeans pockets. "That's crazy! You're here too!"

"Yeah, it's almost like I'm supposed to be here.." Ted playfully side-eyes Tanner, joining in on the bit. "Some guy ate bad chicken and now I'm supposed to be here, like, every day.."

"You would've been here regardless." Tanner narrows his eyes a little at Ted.

"Yeah, but I'd be behind the camera." Ted adds with a smirk. "Wouldn't have to try on 50 suits to be behind the camera."

"Maybe you would've. Maybe I would've made you try on 50 suits."

"You would've made me try on 50 suits? For what?"

"Yeah, maybe, for Conner. He probably would've needed help."

"I can't believe he did that, man.." Joe speaks up, slowly shaking his head as he presses his finger and his thumb into the bridge of his nose. "This entire thing almost didn't happen because Conner decided to get KFC at 12 in fucking the morning--fucking, Conner.."

"It's kinda funny." Tanner adds with a light shrug, smirking slightly.

"It is kinda funny.." Joe immediately agrees with a little point to Tanner, cackling out some. "But it's only funny because Ted saved your asses, let's be real.."

"I'm glad I stepped in but I'll admit, it's weird not bein' the one directing.." Ted smirks, moving to stand at my side as I spread butter along my bagel. "I went to film school to direct, not act."

"You're surprisingly good at it." Tanner adds with a genuine smile. That would probably sound sarcastic if it were coming out of anyone else. "Oh! That reminds me. Ted, I wanna get your opinion on some of the shots from the other day."

"Yeah, sure, we goin' upstairs?" Ted asks, pointing back at the stairs. As they continue to speak, they begin moving over to head upstairs, leaving Joe and I in the kitchen.

"Yeah, your room okay?" Tanner asks, placing his hand on the railing as they move up.

"Yea--oh, uhh..." I hear Ted stammer nervously, giving me a knowing glance. "We, uh, we could look at it in your room.."

"...Why?" Tanner sounds genuinely confused. "You have the better setup."

"Yeah, but..." Ted pauses again, moving slower up the stairs. "...everything's gonna be edited on your PC anyways, right?..."

"...Yeah, alright. Makes sense."

Phew.

I turn my attention back to my breakfast, only to see that Joe is giving me a look. Oh boy, here we go.

"You two aren't even subtle anymore.." Joe speaks with a smirk, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

"I...have no idea what you're talking about.." I feign ignorance, playfully turning my nose up at Joe. Honestly, I have no idea how to handle this situation gracefully. He clearly knows something, but I don't know how much he knows. I feel him move to stand more beside me, leaning back against the kitchen counter with his arms still crossed.

"Oh you don't?" Joe speaks up after a bit of silence, turning his body to face me completely. "You sure about that? Because I can smell the strain on you."

I pause what I'm doing, furrowing my brows in genuine confusion. Huh? "Strain?" I repeat, turning to look at Joe fully.

"Yeah, the strain I got for Ted the other day? The one you two smoked last night?"

My first instinct, for some reason, is to laugh. I cover my mouth to hold back my laughter, a humorous frown forcing the corners of my lips down. I'm not even upset that Joe has caught us. Of course he's the one that gave Ted weed, I should've seen it coming. Joe doesn't even seem to be mad either, at all. He starts having to hold back his own laughter, shaking his head at me.

"You guys are fucking bad, man." Joe crosses his arms again, a slight snicker slipping out. "Tanner smelled it when we passed Ted's room. I had to tell him there was a skunk outside last night!"

"Okay to be fair! To be fair--" I start to speak over Joe a little, still trying to contain my laughter. "I didn't plan to smoke with him! He started smoking before I even went in there!"

"You were in there with him before though."

"Yeah, to record his podcast, not to smoke with him! The smoking came after."

"After you had sex?"

"No, before we had sex, but I had a good reason!"

"Oh my god, (Y/N)..."

"I had a good reason!"

"Of course you did.."

"No I'm serious!"

"I'm sure it was a great reason.."

"Joseph!" I laugh, playfully swatting at him. "I mean it! Okay I know it's gonna sound bad, but the reason's good, I swear!"

"Oh I know, (Y/N), I'm well aware.."

"He--oh my god, Joe--We talked about your wedding!"

I expected Joe to look relieved, but if anything he looked...frustrated, maybe even a little upset? I could feel the entire vibe of the conversation shift. It starts to make me feel uncomfortable. The tension is heavy, and I'm not sure why.

"He finally told you what happened?" Joe asked, finally uncrossing his arms. "He had to get you high to tell you what happened?"

"Okay when you say it like that, it sounds bad." I shrug a little, letting out a chuckle to try and difuse the strange amount of tension in the room. "We're not teenagers, Joseph. I can handle myself. I was fine."

"You're fine?.." Joe repeats, narrowing his eyes at me. His visible frustration shifts into concern. I watch him shift a bit against the counter, his eyes looking me over, like he's looking for something. "...I figured you'd be more upset."

"Why would I be upset?" I ask with another little chuckle, crossing my own arms in front of my chest. "Because he originally went with his girlfriend? Why would that make me upset?"

"No, I just..." Joe's cut off by the sound of Ted and Tanner coming back down the stairs, glancing back briefly before turning to me again.

"So Ted told you everything last night?" Joe asks me, raising a brow at me.

"Yes." I answer simply, giving him a nod.

"Everything?"

"Yes! I'm not upset, I'm flattered, if anything.."

Joe seems to process my answer, but he doesn't look relieved. I watch as he turns back to look at Ted, who's getting his ear talked off by Tanner. Ted's gaze moves to Joe and I, his smile fading a little. I can't see what look Joe is giving him, but it's making Ted look a little uncomfortable. What's going on? What's the big deal? I thought Joseph would be happy for us. Ted clearly had a hard time telling me the truth last night, but he ultimately did. I'm happy he was able to open up, whatever it took.

Joseph turns to me again, the concern and frustration in his face completely gone. Maybe he's just upset that Ted had to get us high to tell the truth, but that's better than hiding it, right?

"...Alright, if you say so.." Joe sighs, taking his coffee off the kitchen counter. "Rehersal is in 20 minutes, if you're gonna make some coffee, do it now, and you might wanna go shower.."

"A-Alright.." I nod a little, watching Joe turn away and leave the kitchen. That was odd. I know I haven't smoked in years, but I'm not a teenager anymore, I can handle a bit of marijuana. I don't plan to smoke with him again, it was just for fun.

That can't be what Joe's so upset about, can it?...

__________________________________

Chapter 1 || Chapter 2 || Chapter 3 || Chapter 4 || Chapter 5 || Chapter 6 (smut) || Chapter 7 || Chapter 8 || Chapter 9 || Chapter 10 (smut) || Chapter 11 || Chapter 12 || Chapter 13 || Chapter 14 (smut) || Chapter 15 || Chapter 17 || Chapter 18 (smut) || Chapter 19 ||

[five-rivers]

Cracked Clay Cup Chapter 4

Phic Phight Phic! @greatbigolhampuckjustforme

“Ughh,” said Danny, falling onto Clockwork’s couch.  

Yes.  Danny.  Despite Jazz lying to him a lot, the name had grown on him.  She wasn’t bad.  Just.  Bad at lying.  And sort of… constantly suspicious.  And definitely not his mother.  He was pretty sure she cared about him.  No one who didn’t care about him would push schoolwork that hard.  

Unless she’d been trying to harvest his brain.  

Yeah, he’d sort of decided that wasn’t what was going on by the end of the second day.  It was still kind of fun to say.  Jazz’s face had made some very funny movements when he brought it up.  It was kind of… endearing.  Yeah.  

“Hello, Daniel,” said Clockwork.  “I take it you had a good time with Miss Jasmine.”

“It was… A time.  I think she did know me before.  She had a lot of funny stories from when I was a kid.  And she had a really nice bedroom for me.  They do their own decorating, right?”

“They acquired and furnished the homes you will be staying in from their own resources, but they may have hired decorators.”

“Okay.  She had very strong opinions about schoolwork.”

“You will find that many of your potential guardians have strong feelings regarding your education.”

“Great,” said Danny.  He rubbed his face.  “Now what?  Do I just jump right into the next one, or do I get, like, a grace period or something?”

“You can take as long to recover from your experience as you’d like.”  He sounded amused.  “You don’t need to push yourself.”

“Mhm,” said Danny.  He stared up at the ceiling.  “Can I see the list again?”

Clockwork set the folder gently down on his lap.  

“Thanks,” said Danny, opening the folder.  “I was thinking about going to the other extreme this time around.  The oldest.  Which page are they?”

“Green,” said Clockwork.  

Danny looked up.  Clockwork’s tone had seemed… off.  But his expression wasn’t any different.  What Danny could see of it, anyway.  He’d turned slightly away, so he only saw the edge of his face.  

He looked back at the manilla folder and the green piece of paper.  

“So,” he said, “ do you know this… Oculus and Orbis?  Those are kind of weird names.  Maybe not too weird for ghosts, though.  Oculus and Orbis.  Eye… and also eye.  Wow.  Wonder if I’m going from someone who wants to steal my brains to someone who wants to steal my eyes.”

“They won’t try to steal your eyes.”

That sounded unconvincing in the extreme.  

“Are you sure?”

“Relatively so.”  That actually sounded rather threatening.  Danny gave him another look, but, again, he seemed fine.  Mostly fine.  

“So…  Married couple.  That’s different.  Maybe they’ll be more like grandparents?  Interests… Coloring.  I guess they mean, like, adult coloring books?  That’s pretty cool, I didn’t mind drawing at Jazz’s.  Watching…  I think they must have left something off here, it just says watching.  Watching… Sunsets?  TV?  Movies?”

“You will have to wait and see,” said Clockwork as he adjusted a painting on the wall.  It was of something generic and pastoral, but it was nice.  

“And… ew.  Astrology.  Do they really like astrology?”

“I can only refer you back to the information sheet.”

“Okay,” said Danny.  “Fortune telling isn’t real, right?”

“It depends on your point of view.”

“You can time travel, right?”

“That is within my powerset, yes.”

“Huh,” said Danny.  “So, you could see the future.”

“I could,” said Clockwork.  “To some degree.”

“So, you already know who I will pick.”

“Not exactly,” said Clockwork.  “Time follows a somewhat more complicated path than that of an arrow.”

“An arrow’s path doesn’t have to be simple, anyway.  It bends, because of gravity.  Unless you’re in space.”

“Indeed.  Have you eaten dinner?”

“Not yet,” said Danny.  “But shouldn’t you already know that?”

“It is polite to ask.”

.

Danny laid awake in bed.  He missed the stars in the bedroom he had at Jazz’s.  The blankets were comfier here, though.  And there were more pillows.  Tradeoffs.  He still hadn’t asked Clockwork if he’d done his own decorating.  

Yeah.  It wasn’t at all bad here.  But he wondered if he had, maybe, acted too quickly with leaving Jazz.  

It was a little too late to doubt his decision, though.  He couldn't undo it.  Not without Clockwork cooperating.  He didn't really want to undo it, anyway.  There were all the other people to visit and figure out and whatever.  

Hopefully, by the end, he'd be able to figure out enough to understand himself. 

He held his hand up over his head, fingers splayed, and tried to reach for the spark of transformation that Jazz swore up and down existed.  Nothing happened.

He sighed and rolled over in bed.  He'd think about it in the morning.  Or never.  Never sounded good. 

.

Danny bounced down the stairs two at a time.  “Breakfast?” he asked, hopefully.  

“Potatoes o'brien with gravy and eggs,” said Clockwork.  “I must confess, I’m surprised you aren’t flying down the stairs.”

“Haven’t really figured it out properly yet,” said Danny, throwing himself into a chair.  “I kept trying at Jazz’s, but I kept running into the walls and ceiling and stuff.  And where would I fly to, anyway?”

“I see,” said Clockwork, sounding vaguely amused.  

“Not what you expected of me, huh?”

“Not particularly.”

“Well, that’s just what happens when you erase someone’s memory and throw them into weird situations with redheads that are a little too obsessed with brain surgery.”

Clockwork’s answering hum was definitely amused.

“Would you like juice with your breakfast?”

“Do you have hot chocolate?” asked Danny.  “With whipped cream?”

“I do,” said Clockwork.  “Would you like some?”

“Please.”

Clockwork pulled an enameled teakettle from one of the cabinets and set it on the stovetop.  The enamel was purple, of course.  

“Are you still set on visiting Oculus and Orbis next?”

“I mean, I’d have to visit them eventually, anyway, right?  That’s the rule, isn’t it?”

“Technically speaking, no.  If you feel a strong enough connection with one of the candidates, you can forgo meeting the rest of them.”

“Wow,” said Danny.  “You really don’t like them.”

“I do not want my feelings to influence you.”

“That’s not a denial.”

Clockwork set the plate down in front of Danny.  “I do not want my feelings to influence you, negative or positive.”

“Sure,” said Danny.  He started to shove food in his mouth.  “So, Jazz told me something weird when I was over there.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah.  Something about me being half ghost.”

“Ah, yes.”

“Yes?  Yes?  You mean that’s a real thing?”

“To some degree, yes,” said Clockwork.

“What does that mean?”

“You have a variety of extremely rare abilities,” said Clockwork.  “Whether those are the results of being half ghost, part human, a superb but singular transformation ability, or something else… That is a matter for debate.”

“Okay, so, transformation.  How?”

“Alas, for all that I can see, I cannot see into your mind.  I do not know how your transformations felt to you, nor how you accomplished them.”

“Oh,” said Danny, pushing around a stray piece of egg on his plate.  That was unhelpful, but he supposed it made sense.  “There’s not anything going on like, um, you’re keeping me from transforming on purpose?  Like how you said you’ve changed my appearance.”

“No,” said Clockwork.  

“Okay,” said Danny.  He scraped together the last of the potatoes.  “I’m going to go get ready before I go.  I’m still going to Oculus and Orbis.”

“Mm,” said Clockwork.  

Yeah, Danny could definitely tell Clockwork didn’t like those two.  This would probably be short, compared to his stay with Jazz.  He went upstairs and brushed his teeth before changing.  Jazz had gotten on his case about that more than once.  

What to wear today… hm…  He flipped through his closet.  Hm.  How about the skirt…  It was a nice silvery green.  And what to go on top?  That jacket was about the same length as the shirt.  And, hm, he didn’t feel like going pants-less… Or stockings.  Maybe capris?  He could do capris.  Those were cool.  Then he could show off the socks Jazz had given him.  

Were those here?  He looked through the sock drawer.  They were.  Huh.  

He really wished Jazz had been honest with him.  He really did.  And maybe a little bit less crazy about school.  Because he was absolutely sure that what she’d had him doing was over and above what schools would do.  

He pulled on his solar system socks.  

Okay.  He was ready.  

He went downstairs.  “I’m ready.”

“I see that,” said Clockwork.  “Your socks are very nice.”

“Oh, thanks!”  

Clockwork tilted his staff to the side and a portal formed.  “As before, press the button when you are ready to return.”

Danny nodded and stepped through.  Once the blue rush of the portal cleared from his ears and eyes, he found himself in a massive marble foyer.  Circular decorations in black and gold were inset in the stone.  Waiting in the center, holding on to each other’s elbows, were the strangest couple Danny had ever seen.  

Well, they were the only couple Danny had ever seen.  They were tall, robed in rich fabrics trimmed in gold and black.  Their skin was a textured, vivid green, and they were totally bald.  Well.  They were wearing wigs, but they were very obviously wigs.  One wig was blonde and long, the other was silver and short.  Both of them covered their eyes.  One was also wearing a long skirt and delicate jewelry.  The other wore bulky jewelry, gloves, and some sort of black sheath over its tail.  

“Phantom,” they said, simultaneously, spreading their arms wide. 

“My dear,” said the one in the skirt in a surprisingly high-pitched voice, “it is so good to see you again.”

“You haven’t had any problems with the riff-raff harassing us with this ludicrous custody dispute, have you, son?” asked the other, in a surprisingly low-pitched voice.  

“No?” said Danny, dodging a hug.  “I haven’t had any trouble.”

“Excellent news!  But now you’re back with us,” said the deep-voiced and vaguely masculine one.  “So you don’t need to worry about it anymore.  All our worries are over.  From now on, we have all our days ahead of us, full of joy and light!”

Danny… was pretty sure that last sentence didn’t make sense.  

“Yes, yes,” said the higher-pitched one.  “We will care for you now and forever.  Your days will be filled with the luxury you so richly deserve.”

“Luxury, huh?”

“Of course, love,” said the high-pitched one.  “Luxury, beyond the dreams of the masses.  Not your dreams, of course.”

“Um,” said Danny.  

“The best foods, the best clothes, the best games–  Everything those other fools would deny you!”

Danny had the distinct sense he was being bribed.  

“Okay,” he said, “but, um, what are your names?”

They looked at each other.  “I am Oculus,” said the low-pitched one.  

“I am Orbis,” said the high-pitched one.  

“Right,” said Danny.  “And who is Phantom?  Is that some kind of ghost pet name?”

“It is your name,” said Orbis.  

“Oh,” said Danny.

“Did Clockwork not tell you?”

“He told me my name is Daniel.”

“Hm,” said Orbis.  

“Hm,” said Oculus.  “Be that as it may, your name is most certainly Phantom.  You have no other.”

Yeah.  Danny wasn’t buying that.  

“Okay,” he said, out loud.  “So, um, how do I know you guys?”

“Well,” said Orbis, sniffing slightly, “we rescued you from those awful ghost hunters, didn’t we?  They treated you so terribly, we couldn’t help but intervene, and then, well, we fell in love with you.  Who couldn’t?”  They started laughing.  The laughter went on for… a while.  

Danny smiled tightly and nodded.  

“But enough of that!” said Oculus.  “We must give you the grand tour!  Show you all the things that are now, and will forever be, yours!”

What followed was a lengthy hike through an absolutely enormous, almost castle-like mansion.  There was so much stuff.  So many things.  Toys, furniture, games, computers, decorations, flowers, perfumes, food.  It was dizzying.  

“And,” said Oculus, gesturing grandly at a set of rooms larger than Jazz’s entire place, “these are your rooms!  There’s an ensuite - with a pool of course - and your favorite video games, and we can’t forget your mini-kitchen, completely stocked–”

Danny sort of tuned them out as they went down the list of things in the rooms, eyes sliding over various accouterments and accommodations.  It was all very nice.  But it was also, somehow, empty.  

Well, the stuff was cool.  He didn’t understand what was going on with the people, but… He could stay here a few days.  

.

Danny wandered the frankly enormous house, looking for his supposed guardians.  He was pretty sure it was in the middle of afternoon, and he had yet to see them.  This, he thought, was not conducive to actually getting to know them.  

So, he was searching as methodically as he could, given the nonsensical layout.  There was a swimming pool in the middle of a ring of kitchens, for goodness sake.  There was a library in the basement.  

But finally, he did it.  

“Uh,” said Danny.  He was pretty sure this one was Orbis.  Long haired wig, light jewelry.  Yep.  “Orbis?”

They didn’t turn around.  

“Orbis?” he repeated.  He came close me.  “Excuse me?  Orbis?”  He tapped their shoulder.  They jumped about a foot.  

“Goodness, child!  Why didn’t you say something if you wanted my attention.”

“I… did,” said Danny.  “Are you not Orbis?”

“I,” said the ghost.  “Yes.”

The other ghost glided into the room.  “Did I hear someone calling me?” they asked.  They were dressed identically to the first.  

Danny looked between the two of them as they started gesturing emphatically at each other.  He knew that ghosts could be weird, and there were a number of different lifestyles that could result in… whatever this was… but he sort of didn’t think that was what was going on.  Actually, he didn’t–  Were these ghosts shorter than they were yesterday?  He hadn’t been paying all that much attention to their dimensions…

The gesture battle they were having, as if they thought he couldn’t see them, was definitely suspicious.  Was there a ghost version of sign language?

Yeah, this was escalating.  He edged closer to the arguing ghosts.  He was about to do something that could be considered socially crass, but…

His hand flashed out and grabbed the wig of the nearest ghost.  He pulled it loose.

Without the wig, the ghost was completely bald.  They were also obviously one-eyed.  They turned to stare at him, that one, huge, eye wide and alarmed.  

Now, Danny didn’t remember all that much, but he knew who the Observants were.  

“Yeah,” he said, grabbing the pocketwatch.  “I’m out.”

[whenthedeeppurplefalls]

Thief!

- a Lumpytouch Where’s Waldo fic

Rated T for language and very mild content

Summary: Waldo steals something from the detective.

This fic contains: canon typical violence, mention of blood, nonconsensual kissing, and swearing.

——-

Icy wind rushed around the detective as he raced down the dark alleyway. He was hot on the striped killer's tail after yet another bloody crime scene was discovered, and this time he wasn’t going to let him get away. This time, he was so close he could practically reach out and touch him.

“ Stop!” The detective shouted, fully aware he wouldn’t be listened to. He knew damn well Waldo would never surrender himself. It didn’t stop him from trying, though. Too many people had died from this monster.

For once, though, fortune seemed to be on his side. He was gaining on Waldo, his prize now drawing closer and closer, his skin crawling in anticipation of finally putting an end to Waldo’s reign of terror. His heart leapt in excitement as the sight of a chain link fence came into view- Waldo wouldn’t be able to get past that. Climbing it would take him time- time for the detective to shoot him, or even grab him.

The detective smiled bitterly. No matter how the night ended, he knew one thing for sure- Waldo would be behind bars. The monster who killed his friend would pay for his crimes at last.

As the gate- and Waldo- drew nearer, Waldo suddenly came to an abrupt stop. Startled, the detective had to stumble to avoid crashing into him. He staggered back a few feet, not terribly eager to have skin to skin contact with the killer.

Waldo paused for a moment, then turned to face him, wide smile never leaving his face.

“Well, detective.” He said. “I guess there’s nowhere for me to run.” He cocked his head. “Oh, whatever will I do?”

The detective didn’t bother dignifying that with an answer. Instead, he reached into his holster, pulling his gun on the criminal.

“You are under arrest.” The detective began, a little overeager. “You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be held against you-”

Waldo silently watched him with the eyes of a hungry animal, quiet and hunting. It filled the detective with unease, and he clutched his gun tighter, raising it to point higher.

“Put your hands up.” The detective commanded. Waldo tilted his head in a rather sickening way. His hands remained limp by his sides, clutching his cane. “ Put your hands up, dammit!” The detective raised his voice. Waldo’s grin widened.

“ PUT-”

“You’re young, aren’t you?” Waldo interrupted. Confused, the detective faltered.

“Wh-”

“I like you.” Waldo continued. “Oh, I like you so much better than McGuy, Detective.”

The detective reddened in… anger? Had to be. He thrust his gun at the killer once again. “Shut the fuck up. Last warning, then I shoot-”

Waldo was clearly not listening. His eyes flicked up to something behind the detective- just over his head. Before the detective had connected the dots, something hard and rounded hooked around his neck, yanking him backwards. Shit! How could he let his guard down enough to forget about the doppelgangers? He cried out roughly, a hoarse “ NO!” As he fell flat. In the few seconds he scrambled to get to his feet, he heard a telltale crack of static that had him swearing through clenched teeth. As he stood, he now saw what should have been so evident before- Waldo was now standing on the other side of the fence, grinning at him from between the metal bars.

“Oh, how embarrassing for you.” Waldo said with a chuckle. “That’s going to leave a mark.”

The detective scowled, rushing forward to grasp at the bars of the fence. Waldo stepped back, though he didn’t exactly need to. They both knew the Detective had no way of getting him now. Frustrated, the detective gave the fence a rattle. Nothing.

“You bastard.” He snarled, clawing out through a gap to attempt to get even the slightest grasp on the killer. No luck. Waldo openly laughed this time, reminded more of a kitten pawing through the door of its cage.

“Oh, you’re a sight, detective.” He chuckled, leaning forward. “I’m going to look forward to our next meeting.”

The detective snarled again, this time managing to fit his (rather thin) arm through a gap in the fence to allow him to get closer to the killer. It seemed being on the smaller side had its advantages after all. This time, he managed to grab onto his sweater.

However… This didn’t work to his advantage after all. In a fluid motion, Waldo grabbed onto his arm, pulled him flush against the gate, and-

Kissed him through the gap.

Completely taken off guard, the detective’s mind went blank for just a moment, arms going limp, caught in Waldo’s grasp like an animal in a trap, eyes snapping open as Waldo kissed him. About two seconds later, realization and sanity kicked in. The detective squirmed frantically in Waldo’s hold, arm caught tightly in the killer’s steel grip. Disgusted (and strangely warm?) He yanked his head back, gasping for breath as Waldo cackled. He attempted to pull back, but Waldo simply yanked his arm again, once again pulling him flat against the fence. The detective gasped.

“You son of a bitch- let me go! What the hell is wrong with y-” And then, Waldo's other hand had caught his chin through another gap in the fence. The detective tensed, almost preparing for another kiss like the first, but this time Waldo simply… observed him. (Admiring him?) The Detective flinched, eyes closing instinctively.

Waldo turned his face this way and that for a moment, then snickered, releasing him, at last. With a choking gasp, the detective yanked his arm back before Waldo could change his mind. Then, he took several steps back. He wasn’t sure what that had been, or why he felt the way he did- all warm, dizzy, confused…

Waldo rested his weight on his cane, smirking after him so condescendingly. “You’re so much better.” He repeated. “Much better than McGuy.” Then, he tapped his cane. “I would say you enjoyed that.”

Frantic, confused, aroused, The detective frantically shook his head, then quickly wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. (The thought had only just occurred to him.) “No.” He babbled. “No. No. You’re wrong.”

Waldo grinned, glasses reflecting like accusing spotlights. “Whatever you say, my sweet.” Then, he playfully waggled his fingers at him. “Run along, now. We both know you won’t catch me tonight… And you have a body to clean up.” Then, arms spread wide, he disappeared with yet another staticky crack as he disappeared, leaving the Detective alone, red in the face, panting, and terribly confused.

What was that?

…What was he going to tell Wenda?

———

Originally I had planned for this to be a 5 + 1 fic of all the different times Waldo had stolen a kiss from the detective, but I wanted to just hurry and get this posted. That being said, if you WOULD like to see this fic continued in that way, let me know.

[gay-dorito-dust]

Hello I love your short fics you do with LeonxReader. I also saw your “tired, trying and internally dying” and it describes me perfectly. I was also wondering if you would do a LeonxReader with some injury/angst and Leon or reader whoever is the injured one making jokes to try and lighten the situation??? Please and thank you💖💖

I appreciate that you enjoy my little Leon x reader stuff and Ngl I made that motto up on the fly when making this blog and now I’m only seemingly to live up to it nowadays 😂

Tw: Hatchets being thrown, injuries, violence, gun violence and reader having a gun.

‘Didn’t your mother ever tell you it’s not good etiquette to greet guests with such hostility?’ You taunted the villager just as he threw his hatchet at your head but you moved out of it’s trajectory in the nick of time. ‘Ha! You missed!’ You exclaimed which would’ve proved in making the villager pissed, but you noticed the sinister look in his eyes as they moved over your shoulder before a sickeningly satisfied smirk stretched across his face.

Just then a pained shout came from behind you and your blood ran cold. ‘Leon?’ You said under your breath and the smile on the villagers face seemed to only grow, as though he was confirming your worst fear; A scowl then replaced your worried expression as your jaw clenched tightly and your blood began to boil out of anger.

‘Say good night you son of a bitch.’ You snarled as you were quick in drawing your gun before putting a couple of well placed bullets through the man’s head, chest and legs in rapid fire succession; Taking an unsettling amount of enjoyment as he fell off the side of the castle battlements and into the veil of smog below before a faint thud could be heard, indicating that the bastard was well and truly dead.

‘Hey, if your done patting yourself on the back, I’m still very much hurt and would very appreciate if my lovely partner would offer me a helping hand, if that’s not too much to ask for?’ Leon’s voice brought you out of your own head and you were quick to look at him; only for your eyes to focus on the handle of the hatchet that stuck out from his shoulder whilst the steel blade was buried deep into his flesh.

‘Oh my god, Leon.’ You said hurriedly as you rushed to his side, trying not to openly express your internal fretting over him but you obviously weren’t doing so well in keeping your composure, as Leon attempted a smile before placing his hand on your shoulder. ‘It’s no biggie, having a hatchet in your shoulder and all.’ He shrugs with his uninjured shoulder. ‘It could’ve been a hell of a lot worse, so I’d give this experience a five out of ten.’

‘Will you quit it with the joking?’ You said, not finding any of this even remotely funny as you gestured to the hatchet in his shoulder. ‘You’re hurt, seriously hurt-‘

‘oh is that what this searing pain in my shoulder is? I wouldn’t have guessed. Thank you for educating me doctor, you really saved my life.’ Leon cuts you off sarcastically and you looked at him with raised brows and arms crossed over your chest as you impatiently tapped your foot. ‘Your ability to run your mouth hasn’t seemed to be hindered much for an injured man, so you should be up to continuing the mission right?’ You told him, flashing a false smile as you patted his chest rather harshly, causing Leon to wince upon each impact of your hand.

‘No, I would like it very much if my partner got me medical attention before I decided to pull this fucker out myself and bleed to death.’ Leon retorted, mimicking you by raising his brows and tapping his foot. The sight was quite humorous that you had to stifle a chuckle behind you hand because of it, before regaining your composure as you then sighed loudly as you moved yourself to Leon’s side and usher him to where you met the merchant last.

Yet with how slow Leon was taking his strides, you couldn’t help but crack a joke at his expense. ‘C’mon grandpa, it’s time for your daily medication.’ Leon scoffed but couldn’t help the smile that slip onto his lips when he noticed how much you’ve calmed down since first seeing his injury; Being a little pain in the arse seemed to have finally pay off in his favour.

‘You’ve been waiting to make that joke you, haven’t you?’ Leon asked, voice light in humour as he gauged your reaction.

‘Maybe.’ You responded, neither denying nor confirming.

‘Bitch.’ Leon said.

‘Jerk.’ You replied.

[vexing-imogen]

a vexing query

@percahliaweek Courage/Heart

"So," Scanlan starts, leaning in towards Keyleth, Pike, and Zahra conspiratorially, "who do we think she meant?"

They all three look at each other and then back at him. "Huh?" Keyleth asks at the same time Pike asks, "Who?"

"Vex!" he hisses, doing a quick scan of the room to ensure that said ranger or her brother weren't within earshot. "You know, with the tree guy." He puts on his best Vex voice, "My heart is someone else's."

(They're totally impressed.)

The ladies exchange another look, this one more amused than confused. (Heh, nice rhyme, Shorthalt)

"You mean you don't know?" Pike asks, incredulous.

"It's so obvious," Keyleth agrees.

Zahra snorts, taking a swig of her drink. "I wasn't even there, and I believe I could at least hazard a guess." She leans over and whispers something to Keyleth, who nods, and then settles back in her chair, satisfied.

There are several beats of silence as Scanlan looks from person to person, waiting for one of them to put him out of his misery. Keyleth seems to be trying to hold back giggles, and Zahra's tail is lashing back and forth.

The awful truth suddenly dawns on him. "None of you are going to tell me, are you?"

Zahra and Keyleth crack up laughing while Pike draws out, "Nope," popping the P and grinning smugly.

He stares at them, aghast. "Why not?"

Keyleth shrugs. "It's more fun this way."

As he sputters, Zahra adds, "You're a smart guy, Scanlan. I'm sure you can figure it out."

Scanlan groans. "I don't know, it could be anyone!" He racks his brain, running through the very, very, very long list of everyone Vex has ever flirted with. "Jarett?"

"No," Pike says, "but that's not a terrible first guess."

He thinks for a minute. "Allura?"

"Colder," they chorus.

"Jeez, okay," he mutters. He narrows his eyes at Zahra. "Is it you?"

She hums. "Oh, I wish, but no," she says. "You are quite a bit warmer, though."

His next guess is a long shot, but, "Is it me?"

Pike barks out a laugh. "In your dreams." (Okay, fair, but she doesn't have to be so rude about it.)

A low murmur of conversation fills the room as Percy and Cassandra enter, clearly just passing through.

"Oi, Percy," he calls out, "help me out here. Who was Vex talking about when she said her heart was someone else's?"

Percy goes very pale, and then very red. "I, uh," he stutters, his voice going higher than usual. "I haven't a clue. Not a one. If you figure it out, let me know." He takes a couple of steps and then turns back. "On second thought, don't do that. I don't care to know. Never mention this to me again. Thank you."

Once the door has shut behind him, Scanlan lets out a low whistle. "Guess I'm not the only clueless one."

This sparks another round of raucous laughter from the ladies, and Scanlan accepts that he's not going to get anywhere playing their little guessing game. He knocks back the rest of his drink, bids them goodnight, and sets off through the castle to his room.

He turns a corner and comes across Grog, stretched out across the corridor, eating mayonnaise out of his jug.

"Hey there, buddy," he greets, hopping up to sit on one of Grog's feet.

"Oh, hey, Scanlan," he says, taking a drink from the tankard of ale at his side. "Feels nice to have a night to ourselves for once, doesn't it?"

"You said it," Scanlan agrees, letting his head thump against the wall. One measly night off before they're off again, chasing down some magic something-or-other through a desert. "Say," he starts, "you wouldn't happen to know who Vex meant when she said her heart belongs to someone, do you?"

"Didn't know it was some kinda big secret," Grog says through a mouthful of mayonnaise. He swallows, belches. "It's Percy, innit?"

Scanlan chuckles to himself. "Whatever you say, Grog."

(Yeah, it's nice to not be the only clueless one.)

[petra-creat0r]

Chapter 5 Secret Boss Prediction

Ohohohoh boy! Finally got to this one. I've been just sort ruminating on this boss for a while. The only thing I knew for the longest time is I'm at least 60% confident that chapter 5 will happen in the Flower Shop? But then what could be abandoned, discarded, or unwanted in a greenhouse/flower shop? Weeds? Mushrooms? Well I guess? Lotta flowers and though the mushroom idea was enticing at first, I couldn't wrap my head around a good idea for it. There was also the thing with this boss likely having the blue soul mode, and possibly having a reference or allusion to Papyrus (or Sans ig but Paps uses the blue soul mode first). But then also also with this being Asgore's flower shop and Asriel possibly being involved, there's the chance it could be based on Flowery, but then- And you can start to see why this took me so long.

EVENTUALLY, I came up with the idea of an abandoned toy soldier, lost among the plants and eventually taken over by them. There was also some talk about it being a nutcracker or garden gnome instead, but toy solider won over. Nutcracker felt too similar to Spamton and I just couldn't really get the garden gnome to vibe right. Anyways! Like two, three weeks ago I managed to sketch a design I kinda liked before trying to think on it more. Still not the boss I'm proudest off, but everyone, met The Great and Mighty Veratus! (Name subject to change if I can find a better one.)

(Once again, theme commissioned by my good friend @kierangecko)

Veratus, from verrat (German for traitor), ratus (latin for rat) and a corruption of veritas (truth). I think the thing I was struggling with for the longest time was the name. It needed to fit with the other names, and also sound good with the title of "The Great" (because Papyrus reference). Like I mentioned before though, that name is subject to change if I come up with something better.

Like I've mentioned with the other two, I know this is no where close to what we'll actually get, but all of this is just for fun and so I have some secret bosses to draw my Junior Secret Squad kiddies with. Once we DO finally get chapter 5, Veratus will likely just become one of the secret bosses of Fool's Fate.

Now, backstory under the cut.

A solider from a distant land, Veratus found himself stranded in this dark world after the Great Divide. His king and fell soldiers in arms falling back and leaving him for dead. At the mercy of the Flower Kingdom's new ruler and its army.

Luckily for Veratus, the Knight chose not to bother killing the lone soldier, thinking that the side effects of the Divide would render the rat to stone soon. Yet for some reason, Veratus did not become stone...

Alone and outcast in a world not his own, Veratus was eventually found by a man. A strange someone whom some had theorized brought forth the Great Divide. The man cast pity on Veratus, and offered the stranded soldier his help. The opportunity to blend into this world and infiltrate Knight's army in exchange for his loyalty and help getting close to Knight. Veratus agreed.

Veratus's fur became overtaken with moss and his body with vines, though it might have been painful it did make him look like a rather convincing part of this floral Dark World. In addition to this transformation, the man also opened Veratus's mind to the reality of his existence, as the man had with the rest of his pawns.

Veratus was able to infiltrate Knight's army and climb up the ranks thanks to the assistance of the man, only to be left behind and forgotten once again once the man was able to get close to his true target. Disappearing and leaving a Roaring Knight in his place. Without the man, the cracks in Veratus's facade began to show and it didn't take long for the rat to be ratting out as a rat. the Knight's army tried to kill him, but something kept him from falling. The plants consuming his body wouldn't let him die. So instead, the opposing army cast the lone solider out. Exiling him back to a life of solitude.

Until another knight and their friends arrived in the kingdom...

[aclowntiny]

Hongjoong + Firsts

Continuing my firsts series 🥰 thanks @xlli3 for also requesting to see this! Don’t mind me giving (y/n) & joong my dream pet for the man of my dreams 🤕

First Date: The first time you officially go out, Hongjoong takes you to a paint night! He loves the idea of you guys receiving the same prompt, hearing the same instructions yet creating something different- to him, this date will more deeply capture some part of both of your essence. He already knows you, so dating is just to strengthen that! The theme is nature and sure enough, you create very different pieces, his an intricate design of plant life while you sketched an animal portrait.

First Time Holding Hands: You’re a few dates in when the late night chatting starts, both of you on your backs stargazing. The sky is like a broken string of pearls, light scattered, and the beauty has your voices quiet with awe even as you spill your innermost thoughts. Insecurity blankets you, though, itching beneath your skin harder than the blades of grass poking through holes of the quilt you laid on. Your quiet voice fails. “I- I don’t know if that makes sense…” Warmth flooded you as Hongjoong’s hand fell atop yours. He sat up, eyes fixing on yours, a soft smile upon his lips. “Of course I understand.”

First Kiss: It’s a little longer before your first kiss, definitely not because he doesn’t want to, but just so the moment is right. It’s early in the morning- a rare, sudden open time in Hongjoong’s schedule that has you getting ready at the crack of dawn. Literally. The two of you stand upon a bridge watching the sunrise, commenting of course on its beauty. “I love getting to see a new beginning like this with you,” you comment, “it feels right.” Something breaks in Hongjoong the moment you say that, drawing him in until your lips connect beneath the day’s first faint rays.

First ‘I Love You’: This was a moment you two would share in private, one that would be special if Hongjoong had anything to say about it. And he did, setting up a rooftop dinner complete with fairy lights just for you. Meal complete, he turns on a speaker, extends a hand. “May I have this dance?” You oblige him, smiling at the extra affection he’s been showing, whether it was the way his hand trailed down your arm at dinner or the way he held you tighter than usual as you swayed. Soon, though, you’re barely moving as he’s pouring his heart out to you, telling you that you’re his muse, his heart. “I love you.”

First Fight: “One day! One day is all I’m asking!” “You don’t think I would give it to you if I could?” All you wanted was for him to show a little spine, get one day off for you but it looked like yet again that wouldn’t be possible. “I don’t know, sometimes I wonder if you even try,” you shoot back, turning away from him. “You don’t think I-” Hongjoong sighs, the intense dark of his eyes subsiding. “Can you not tell how much I love you?” You were ready for him to yell, to keep going back and forth or leech more venom into his words, so the soft entreaty caught you off guard. “I just…” You sighed, too. That wasn’t fair. You knew he tried- seen it in the things he made you by hand and dates he’d set up carefully as arranging a stage. “Sometimes with it all it just feels like I’ll never be as important as your job. I let that take over.” His eyes fluttered shut, one final shudder of frustration draining from Hongjoong before he speaks again. “I know, love. I’ll try. I want to try for you, I do.”

First Anniversary: It seems like a romance novel come to life when you finally lay your eyes upon the surprise Hongjoong said he had for you. “Everyone tends to do rings,” he told you, “so I guess I wanted to do something different.” ‘Something different’ being custom-ordering a unique pair of necklaces for you each, similar but not identical, just like your unique souls. You held the chain with one hand, gently caressing the pendant with the other. It was obvious how much thought had gone into capturing your personality, something that spoke your name. “What do you think?” Hongjoong asks, glancing with a smile of uncertainty that surprised you. “Of course I love them!” You reply, all but rocket-launching into his arms, the pendant lightly striking the back of his jacket. “Happy six months,” his voice rang out in your ear as his hand wrapped around your back, pulling you close.

First Pet: “Are you sure that’s not dangerous?” Giggling, you shake your head. “Nope, he’s just a baby. Worst he can do is a nick if he bites.” “He bites?” “Only if we mess with him. Come on, you liked the idea before. Having cold feet?” Holding up the small young snake plaintively slithering along your hand where he wrapped himself, you watched Hongjoong’s apprehension melt into a smile. “No, not really. You look so cute with him. Got a name?” “Snape.” “Snape the snake?” “Yep.” Hongjoong just shakes his head, chuckling. “Alright, professor. Welcome home,” he bends down to speak to your new baby.