#though I also went into it almost entirely blind as people don't talk about it enough

[mooshorange]

Do you ever think about The Island of Dr Moreau? Do you ever think about the fact that Prendick never fully recovered from what happened to him? Do you ever think about how he gained a dislike for people, religion, and everything he used to know? Do you ever think about the way he withdrew from society and never fully reentered it due to the trauma of what happened? Do you ever think about the fact that he didn't just go back to normal or do some 'real men don't experience emotion' thing? Do you ever think about the fact that talking through what happened and how it affected him with someone else helped him feel better and recover a little, even if things could never be the same?

Yeah, me neither. I am also normal and definitely don't think about this all the time.

[forever-rogue]

i mean 👀👀 agent whiskey is such a flirt i would probably die if he flirted with me he would have me the moment he opened his mouth. But also i could see him flirting with the nerdy lab assistant who he really likes but she thinks he isnt being serious bc of the amt of flirting he does on cases. (hes so attractive it hurts)

AN | No but the cowboy could flirt with me any time 🥺❤️

Pairing | Jack “Whiskey” Daniels x Fem!Reader

Warnings | None

Word Count | 2.2k

Masterlist | PP Characters, Main

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

"You're going to give yourself a headache, sugar," the outside of his warm southern drawl caused you to almost jump out of your chair. You hadn't even heard him coming; he was incredibly stealthy but you knew that was just part of the job. You turned to him and offered a small smile, trying not to stare at his ridiculously handsome face, "staring at the computer too much and workin' entirely too hard."

"I, shit - Jack," immediately you wished the floor would open up and swallow you whole, "I didn't even hear you!"

"Well, I wouldn't be very good at my job if you did hear me," he teased, sitting on the edge of your desk, which caused you to have a mild freak out. You gave him a nervous, tight lipped smile before shrugging, "do you ever take breaks?"

"Sometimes," your cheeks warmed up as he tutted at you, "when time allows."

"I don't like that answer," he drummed his fingers along the top of the desk before quickly hopping off and holding his hand out to you. You stared at it as though it was some weird, foreign thing, "come on. I'm taking you to lunch."

No. Nope. Definitely not. You weren't sure if you'd be able to survive that. 

"Oh Jack," you shook your head and rolled your chair a little further away, "I can't. I'm… too busy."

"Hmm," he hummed softly but didn't pull his hand away, "I think you know by now that I am a stubborn man. And I don't usually take no for an answer."

"Jack…"

"Come on," he tilted his head towards the door and motioned for you to follow, "I'll even let you pick the place. I won't keep you for too long, sugar, I just want to make sure you've had something to eat and taken a well deserved break."

You stared at him for a few long seconds before slowly nodding. 

It wouldn't be too bad. Right? Right.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

"So," you didn't like the sound of Ginger's tone at all. You knew it all too well. You froze as you poured your cup of coffee, "I heard you went out with Jack."

"Oh yeah, we - wait," you almost dropped the carafe, "what!? Ginger, what are you talking about?"

"I heard from Trish who heard from Christine that you and Jack went on a little date," there was a huge smirk on her face as you tried to process even what she was saying.

"Ginger. Ginger," you set everything down and turned to her, holding your hands up as an act of surrender, "you of all people know that you shouldn't listen to gossip!"

"Oh," she shrugged lightly and crossed her arms over her chest, "but you're not denying it."

"I - no!" You groaned heavily, "we didn't go out, Ginger. We…he came to my office and insisted that I needed a break and we went to grab lunch. It wasn't a date or anything."

"But you did go out," you opened and closed your mouth a few times, "you could have said no, right?"

"I…" you thought about it a few more moments, "but it's Jack. You know how persuasive he can be."

"Mhmm," she made her own coffee and turned her back to you. You sighed heavily, "of course he is. But he's also sweet on you."

"He is not," you sounded almost indignant but her words gave you a moment of pause. He wasn't, was he. No…he was just an openly flirty man. It wasn't just specifically with you…the idea was preposterous, "that's just how he is."

"Is it though?" She mused sweetly. You couldn't even be annoyed with her, she was too sweet for that, "listen, sweetheart, you're a scientist. You're incredibly intelligent but you're so blind. Open your eyes a little bit and then you'll have your answer."

"What's that supposed to mean?" You asked but she was gone and out of sight before you even finished your question, "Ginger?"

“Just Jack last time I checked,” oh maker. Of course the man in question had to have that perfect timing. You closed your eyes for a moment and let out a low breath. This was Jack after all, just another coworker. There didn’t have to be anything weird about it. The fact that you’d harbored a crush on him for as long as you’d been working was another thing entirely. Of non-import. Except that it was becoming an increasingly large problem that made it hard to be around him. Hell. Maybe this was worse than you had thought. 

“O-oh,” you pasted on the best smile you could muster up in that moment before turning back to the coffee that seemed to be the most interesting thing in the world, “hi.”

“Hey sugar,” he really had to have that warm, syrupy drawl didn’t he? It made your knees weak, “everything alright? You seem awfully jumpy.”

“Everything’s just fine,” you were a liar. Everything was most definitely not fine, “just needed a coffee break.”

“I’d suggest water,” he leaned against the counter and gave a lazy little half smile, “but I’m glad to see you’re taking a break at least.”

“Mhmm,” a tightlipped smile was thrown his way, “had to stop staring at my screen for a while.”

“Well good,” he reached over and gave your shoulder a squeeze. His touch was electric and sent shivers down your spine and butterflies to explode in your tummy, “listen, I was wondering if-”

“I’ve gotta go,” you took a step out of the room and away from him, “I’ve got a lot to do.”

Jack watched as you almost ran away back to your office. He shook his head fondly and decided that he would check in on you later. There was no reason for him to scare you off now; everything would happen in time.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Over the next couple of weeks it seemed like you saw Jack everywhere you went. Whether or not it was intentional it was starting to drive you crazy. The man took up enough of your mind already, he didn’t need to be the only thing on it. Any time you weren’t actively thinking about something else, the cowboy took over your thoughts. It almost wasn’t fair. 

This particular evening you were positive you were the last one left in the building. There were just a few things you needed to finish up and you hadn't planned on being there too much longer.

That’s why when you heard the footsteps coming from down the hall, your brain went into fight or flight mode. You grabbed the nearest thing that you thought could serve as a weapon and clutched it tightly. Padding over to the door, you hid just out of sight and waited for the intruder to come in. 

You held your breath as you got ready to attack and as soon as you the person walked through the door, you jumped and yelled at them. He was startled in response but you quickly realized that it wasn’t just any intruder…it was Jack. Of course.

Sighing heavily, you lowered your arms and took a step back, “what the hell, Jack?! Are you trying to give me a heart attack?”

“Me?” he asked, eyes wide and incredulous, “you’re the one brandishin’ a beaker at me!”

“It was all I could find!”

“Did you really think that little thing was going to protect you?” his surprise quickly turned into amusement as you eyed the glass in your hand.

“I dunno,” you set it back down and took a step back, “it was just…the moment. What are you even doing here?”

“Working,” he put his hands on his waist as he was prone to doing, “what about yourself, sugar?”

“Working,” you echoed softly, “I was just getting ready to leave in a few minutes.”

“Funny,” he offered you the sweet smile that you found hard to resist, “I was going to do the same thing."

"Funny," you agreed meekly although you definitely did not think it was funny. This was Jack after all…he didn't do things without purpose, "well, I guess I'll let you get back to it."

"Listen," he paused in the doorway but you'd already turned around, face contorting into a grimace, "would you want to stop for a bite to eat?"

You had a feeling this was coming but it didn't stop the clench of your shoulders that you just knew he could see, "umm, I'm okay. Thank you for offering though."

"You got any plans tonight?" He strode back over, determined as ever. Even though you were anxious as hell, you couldn't deny that his gentle persistence was making you melt, "darlin'."

"N-not really," you admitted, side-eyeing him sneakily, "just stuff and things."

"Stuff and things," he repeated and you nodded. He huffed lightly before hesitantly reaching over and putting a finger under your chin. When you didn't pull out of his touch, he brought your face up to his, "is there a reason you're avoiding me?"

"N-no," you lied weakly as he tutted in disbelief. You caught his eye for a moment before swallowing thickly, "you make me nervous." 

You weren't even entirely sure if you'd meant to say it out loud but there it was. No going back now. His eyes widened for a minute before he nodded, "is there a particular reason why? Have I ever done or said anything to make you feel that way? If so, I greatly apologize-"

"You haven't done anything wrong," you quickly stopped him and shook your head fervently, "its just…you."

"Me?" He was bemused and you were floundering. How very typical.

"Yes," you sighed lightly, "you're all great and wonderful and lovely and I feel like if I go out with you're just going to be even better and I'll fall in love! But it won't be the same for you because you don't like me like that, you're just flirty with everyone."

"Hold on a minute there, sugar," he pushed back a few locks of stray hair out of your face, watching you intently, "you're going a million miles a minute."

"Jack-"

"There is some truth to what you've said," he agreed, "but a lot of falsehoods too."

"Oh. Oh?"

"I don't expect you to fall in love with me," he whispered, "at least not yet. But in case you haven't noticed, which I see now you did not, I am sweet on you. I like to think I'm nice to everyone, most people anyway, but that's often mistaken for flirtation. However this old cowboy ain't got eyes for anyone but you."

Surely your mind was manifesting this. Maybe you'd fallen asleep at your desk and were in the middle of a fever dream. But….no. you definitely felt him brush his knuckles along your cheek before he traced his thumb along your bottom lip.

"Seriously?" You cringed as soon as you blurted out your question, "me?"

"Mhmm," he hummed softly, "I'm not forcing you into anything - and if you prefer for me to leave you alone completely let me know - but I'd love to have the honor of taking you to dinner."

"Like a date?" Scientist who? Clearly you were a wordsmith.

"Not just like a date but an actual date," he agreed, a smile turning up the corners of his mouth and displaying his dimple, "tonight can be casual but perhaps this weekend you'd let me do this all properly."

"Okay," your answer came out softly and easily, causing your face to warm up and his to light up brighter than the sun. It wasn't really even a question; you liked Jack a lot…you'd just never thought he could feel the same. And yet here you were.

"You're thinking much too loudly, darlin'," he chuckled as you blinked owlishly, "wanna tell me what's on your mind?"

"I sure will," he really did have the loveliest smile, "but I'd like to take you out first. I want to do this thing right."

"Will you kiss me?" Ugh. You were definitely crawling into a hole and never leaving.

"Wow," he was just too dreamy.

"Wow yourself," he teased affectionately, "now what do you say we get out of here?"

"Yes," every fiber of your being was humming with excited energy, "please."

"Well come on then, sugar," he took your hand and pressed a kiss to the back of it. Swoonworthy, that's what he was, "ain't got no time to waste!"

Yeah. Maybe this wasn't such a bad idea after all.

[riddlerosehearts]

okay, i've got some things i wanna say about twst EN's translation of scarabia's story that i was originally typing out as part of a response to an ask, but then i realized i was going off on a bit of a tangent and was like "this could basically be its own post"--so now it's going to be its own post!

i'm a twst EN player, and for the most part, i do really like the localization. i don't speak japanese but i love learning about language and the process of translation and localization, so at one point after finishing books 1-5 i went and reread them all (and 6 as well, once it was fully released on EN) with a fan translation and the localization side by side to compare them. and from what i could tell as someone who isn't a japanese speaker, i honestly thought it seemed like they usually did pretty well? sure, there were a few mistakes like cater claiming to be an only child (this one, i think, has actually been fixed recently), or how in book 2 they removed a small mention of falena making it seem like he's never mentioned at all until leona's flashback and they also removed the numerous times that he said "be prepared" (at least they finally properly translated it in book 6, though!!). but i thought most of these mistakes were somewhat minor and could be forgiven... until book 4 (well, and book 5, mostly in regards to vil and epel's conflict and i'm not talking about them here, so).

see, i actually realized that something was off about the localization when i first played through book 4, because i have a weird memory and have picked up a bunch of random words and phrases from being into japanese media and reading so much about the localization process. and i also play twst with the sound on because i love to hear the voice acting. so sometimes i would hear jamil speak, i'd pick out the words "shujin" and "juusha" for "master" and "servant", and then the subtitles wouldn't include them at all. so i'd guess certain things about the actual intent behind the story based on that. take this message i sent to my friend when i was sharing my blind reactions to the game:

and she ended up telling me that apparently, what i thought he should say essentially IS what he originally said!! according to the fan translation on wiki.gg he said this instead:

i had wondered if maybe i was reading into things and assuming too much, but it turned out i was completely spot on! but most people who play EN would not be able to pick up on this and realize that jamil was born into servitude to kalim and has no escape, because as i later discovered almost every single mention of him being a servant at all was removed, in events and vignettes as well. which is actually really weird to me because they don't remove it entirely, they do in fact bring up the fact that jamil has to test all of kalim's food for poison during book 4 and they also left in a line where he says he "works as kalim's servant". but they only really mention these things once or twice and then they try to sort of play it off as jamil being a paid employee or something most of the time... seriously, during beanfest there's dialogue where jamil says it would be rude to refuse an order from his boss but i've read that that line was originally him saying a servant couldn't disobey his master. and in the scalding sands event he calls himself "a dedicated employee" of kalim's... what, am i supposed to assume he works as a butler by choice or something? yeah, no. also, one of his birthday vignettes, which are fully voiced so i could TELL he said, with a devious smirk on his face, that if he had a parrot the first word he would teach it would be "shujin-sama". "master". what did EN change this into?

the person i was originally writing all of this in response to said that sometimes people's takes on jamil make them wonder if people are reading a completely different story but also that part of that can probably be blamed on the way EN completely changed the context of his situation with these translation choices. and yeah, i fully agree with that assessment: more casual fans or people who just aren't that interested in the scarabia duo could be said to be reading a different story with this whole "boss" and "employee" thing that has jamil make it sound like the worst that could ever happen to him if he got in trouble would be getting a really stern lecture from his parents.

and it makes me sad because i really do love both jamil and kalim so much and i think their dynamic is so tragic and complicated and interesting to think about. i think they're both really complex characters who are trapped in an awful situation. kalim is so kind and loving and would never wanna hurt anyone but he hurts jamil just by existing as part of the fucked up society they live in. kalim thought he and jamil were best friends, he had no idea of the toxicity of their dynamic and the pain jamil was in, and people say jamil should've just talked to him about it earlier... but jamil's first memory as a child is of seeing his parents bow to the asim family. being a servant is practically all he's ever known and he's had it drilled into his head since they were both small children that he can never be himself around kalim, can never just treat him like a normal person because he's a servant and kalim is his master. and even if he did accept kalim's offer to start over as equals and be friends, what would happen when they had to go home to their families? they won't be at school forever.

and i just. augh. i hate what the localization does with them. if you try to water them down to just an employee who's super mad at his obliviously crappy boss, or just two childhood friends who needed to communicate better or something like that, then you take away from the complexity of both characters. you also lose extremely cool writing choices like how jamil is a character who was born into servitude but has the power to make himself the master with his unique magic. i see so many takes about how jamil is just a jerk who betrayed his best friend and how kalim never did anything wrong in his entire life and i hate it but i'm sure the localization's choices are in fact to blame for a lot of this.

so anyway jamil and kalim's actual dynamic is fascinating and lives rent-free in my head, no thanks to how the EN version gutted it.

[yeenybeanies]

This is sort of a two-parter

Was part of why Price was so sad to see that Soap had hybridized himself because he knew it effectively halved his life expectancy? (Just saw your new tweet about hybrids rarely living past 50) and did Soap know it would do that?

Additionally would Gaz be any sort of exception because his species is so long lived? Or would it be burning the candle on both ends because he never stops growing, hence taxing his body faster

And then pt 2.

You said Ghost is effectively blind, how does that affect him with using firearms and how did the task force find out about that? I imagine he doesn't go about advertising it

aaaa i'm LIVING for these questions aaa thank youuuu!!!

putting under a cut bc it's a lil lengthy.

SO yes! that is definitely part of why price was sad! i haven't worked out a full timeline yet of events but price has been a hybrid for most of his military career (underwent the change when he was 19; he is currently 37, but him reuniting with soap was probably a couple of years ago). price was pretty well-informed on what hybridization would/could do to him, & how it would, among other things, shorten his lifespan.

when he was mentoring soap early on, working to get him into the SAS, soap had expressed a passing interest in undergoing hybridization, but price strongly advised against it. said he didn't need it. truly no one needed it. never went into much detail, though. soap didn't bring it up much after, so price figured it was settled. moved on.

so, when price does reunite with soap after soap's hybridization––which he did without telling price (he wasn't obligated to, & hadn't talked to him in a while)––price feels more than anything a sense of guilt. regret. like it's his fault for not doing more to talk soap out of essentially ruining his life.

made worse still because soap wasn't fully informed on what hybridization does. not for a lack of trying to find out so much as he was more or less lied to about it. he was fed the perks, while the downsides were downplayed or omitted.

gaz would not be an exception partially for your reasoning, yes. the continuous growing, even if it's slow, does tax the body significantly. & crocodilian longevity, it doesn't counteract the other strain that's put on the body as a result of the hybridization. the fact of the matter is that human bodies are not meant to be spliced together with these animals, & hybridization is not done with the recipient's health in mind. hybrids are created to be tools & weapons. so long as they can do what they were made to do, that's good enough.

so ghost is largely blind, yes. pretty much entirely blind in his left eye, & his vision is still pretty bad in his right eye. he can detect light (which he is still very sensitive to, despite the poor vision) & shapes, but not much else. he does wear contacts/corrective lenses, though. not a whole lot can be done for his left eye, but it's salvageable in his right, which is the eye that he shoots with anyway. it gives him decent enough distance vision that, with a scope, he can snipe just fine. (reading things up close, however, is a bit more of a challenge, as the contacts make him far-sighted.)

for closer situations, he doesn't really rely on sight at all. he instead uses his sense of smell, hearing, & echolocation. & he's damn good with it too. most people don't know that he's almost blind, because he moves & behaves like anyone with decent vision would. he tracks movement with his eyes, makes eye contact, & he can fight/shoot perfectly at close/medium range. hell, he can shoot better than most because he can work in pitch black with ease, & he doesn't need to be facing a target to know it's there.

price does pick up on the blindness almost immediately, since he's known ghost the longest & was there to help him adjust to his forced hybridization. & also because he's price. ghost knows gaz the next-longest, & probably just ends up telling him eventually. gaz suspected something was up (bc ghost is always wearing sunglasses, even at night), but never asked, & certainly didn't think that ghost's vision was as bad as it actually is. that surprised him, considering how ghost can still snipe. soap likely figures it out on his own after a while. just because of how his relationship is/grows with ghost & how close they end up becoming. soap is observant. notices how ghost squints sometimes, how he occasionally asks someone to read or summarize something to him, & other small things. & he might not ask about it either, but he'll start doing things to try & accommodate. writing/drawing things bigger. offering to read stuff for ghost (or just doing it unprompted). sharing audiobooks & music he thinks ghost would like. & when ghost does admit that he's mostly blind, soap's just like. oh. i know, but i'm glad you felt comfortable enough to tell me 🥰

[greenerteacups]

So, because I definitely care a Normal Amount ™ about Lionheart, I went back and re-read the entire thing in preparation for the last chapter of Book 4. It was such an interesting exercise because while I love reading serialized fiction (it's such a core part of what makes fanfic amazing) - it really does hit differently when you look at the story up until this point in it's entirety. (I could go on absolutely unhinged tangents about how much the way you have adjusted canon that just scratches the excema in my brain.)

However- on this re-read, the line that Draco says when he and Hermione have their seminal discussion in the owlery snagged my mind and I can't stop thinking about how Draco accuses Hermione of liking the fact that he's meaner than she is. Because on one hand - yes? He absolutely has less of a sense than she does about Right Decisions, because she always wants to do the "right" thing, but objectively its not always the right thing to do - its just moral relativism rearing its old ugly head again. But on the other hand, he's completely wrong because Hermione (at least in the original books) has this enormous capacity for cruelty that shes not even aware of - partially because girly does not have a single ounce of tact, but also because she wasn't brought up in the wizarding world. She lacks some of the context and cultural clues that allow characters like Draco and Daphne to navigate with an ease she likely envies. And while all the Slytherin bbs have high IQs and low EQs, I think they also are hyper aware of personal standing, so I could easily see Hermione blithely insulting someone without realizing it and completely RUINING their day/month/year etc.

I'm curious if you've thought any more about this dynamic between D/H - and what they think of the others capacity for mean-ness and cruelty??

YES! To all! Especially the bit about Hermione having "an enormous capacity for cruelty that she's not aware of," because yes, that's pretty much one of her cardinal faults as a character — the insidious combination of (a) not really prioritizing other people's feelings if/when they conflict with something Hermione wants or feels, and (b) not being at all aware that she has that quality, and in fact believing herself to be the most emotionally intelligent member of the Trio. (Remember "emotional range of a teaspoon"? I burst out laughing when that happened, because like... girl. The call is coming from inside the house.) At the same time, she's smart enough to recognize when other people are unkind or tactless, so there's this beautifully intricate hypocrisy to how she understands her own emotional intelligence — her pride and arrogance blind her to ways that she neglects others, but her sincere generosity, kindness, and desperate yearning to be helpful and good to other people actually do allow her to see when other people are bad at it, as well as propel her to... well... try. It's a really interesting combination. Hermione is so much fun.

I wouldn't characterize that as cruelty, though, and to an extent it's not necessarily meanness — not in the way that Draco's talking about in that conversation, anyway. Firstly, as a caveat, Draco is in the middle of a fight when he accuses Hermione of liking the fact that he's mean, so I don't think he's altogether sincere about it; I think if you asked him in a moment of repose, he would have a more measured and generous interpretation on their dynamic, even though he's not necessarily wrong. Rather, I think what Draco said is a very inelegant way of pointing out how Hermione uses Draco as a moral backboard: she enjoys the moral high ground, does Granger, and Draco is almost always completely happy to cede it to her. Being around Draco makes her feel like a Good Gryffindor, because while he matches and challenges her intellect/ambition/drive, she gives him direction and moral focus, which is a role he's explicitly told her she plays on multiple counts, and which she's expressed insecurity about in the past (their fireside conversation about "am I good?" and what that means — the idea of capital-G Goodness, and how it becomes increasingly difficult to find as you leave childhood, is one of the tenets of Hermione's arc.)

Secondly, I think Draco is just meaner than Hermione because when he is mean, he does it on purpose. One of the earliest moments of bonding that they ever have as people comes from Draco making fun of Ron's performance in Charms (while imitating his accent, to add insult). Hermione doesn't make the joke herself — but she does laugh at it. She finds it funny. Of course, that's before she's friends with Ron, and she has about 500,000 words of personal growth in front of her, but she still enjoys Draco's dry humor and his attention to detail, both of which he not infrequently uses to make fun of people on purpose. Draco knows this, and he likes amusing her, and sometimes he'll actively make a mean joke because he knows she finds it funny, and because he knows she won't make it herself. They're not the most likable people in the world.

Hermione may not have the same social graces as people born in the magical world, but when she insults people, she usually does it on accident, out of tactlessness, or because they've (in her eyes) well and truly earned it. She doesn't go out of her way to pick on people who haven't asked for it first, and I would go so far as to say her moral compass bars her from it. That's part of what Draco means when he claims to be the worse person, and while he's being wildly uncharitable in that argument, not to mention just an all-around arsehole, he is also a licensed expert on the particular subject of his relationship with Hermione Granger. He knows their dynamic very well, and she knows it.

[velvetvexations]

So this is going to be kind of an insane ask to get but I don’t have anybody I can tell in my real life and you’re like the only person I follow who seems to genuinely give a shit about Ukraine still so. You can just delete it if you want to, I don’t mind. Just actually writing it out to another person will help.

I’ve been considering for the better part of 2024 joining the Ukraine volunteer army. Like, seriously considering, not just some throwaway thought. I even got my passport specifically because I was thinking about it. I know someone who did. Haven’t heard from him in a while but that’s the nature of this sort of thing, as far as I know he’s still out there. I want to also. I’ve got extended family in both Ukraine and Russia (which is more common than you’d think) but my parents are immigrants (it was long before I was born) and I’ve always been close to my extended family and people I’ve talked to from both places in my family are unhappy and everybody hates that this is happening. There’s this like chasm between both halves of my extended family now bc people can’t see each other anymore. Multiple of my extended family from Ukraine had to either run away to other countries or join the military, and I had one of my Russian cousins almost get caught immigrating to avoid being conscripted (he made it, he’s fine, he lives out of country now) and I hate being here in America watching it all happen and not able to do a damn thing about it, I donate as much as I can to a variety of Ukrainian funds and send money to family too, but I work at a fast food place and rent a shithole apartment I can barely afford, I can’t really donate much. But I’m a guy (well, not really, but I’m 0% transitioned and I’m fine with staying like this for something more important), I’m decently fit, I speak a little Ukrainian, I know how to use a gun, and from what I heard from the person I knew who went and what I’ve heard looking on forums and stuff that’s basically all they want at this point. Hell two of those things, language and experience with guns, seem to be slipping out of the requirements too because they need more people so bad. I feel like if I don’t I’m going to be crawling with regret for the rest of my life especially, ESPECIALLY, if Russia gets the upper hand and Ukraine falls. At least if I do this I could try to make a fucking minuscule sliver of a difference. But I know my parents will be really upset, especially if I just take off. My friends too but I don’t have a lot of those anyways. And obviously I know I might die, or be disabled or whatever but I just don’t care, even though I feel like I should. But I just don’t, because I feel like doing my part would be worth either of those things. Maybe I’m just crazy and blinded by how upset this entire fucking “conflict” makes me, but like your other anon said it really feels like the entire world forgot, or at least America forgot, unless you have personal connection to the region. I don’t even know how to end this ask. That’s my confession. You and maybe your followers if you do post this are the only ones who know now and that’s that

I love you, anon. I won't tell you not to but I want you to know - you can still help without volunteering. Donating helps. Spreading awareness helps. You will have nothing to be ashamed for if trying your best does not extend to sacrificing your life. You are still strong and providing desperately needed value.

I just want you to please consider that, okay? You said you don't have many friends - but even though I don't know who you are, you and your life matters to me. If you'd ever like to talk to me you can DM me for my Discord. I'd be happy to be your friend.

If not, that's okay as well. I just want you to know that your life has value, too, even if you help in other ways.

[cherrybombfangirlwrites]

One to Five (WIP Tag)

tagged by: @kaylinalexanderbooks thank you (and don't mind me while I'm clearing out my notifications and likes XD)

tagging: Open Tag and soft tagging @sarahlizziewrites | @odysseywritings | @ink-fireplace-coffee | @sleepyowlwrites | @words-after-midnight | @lawful-evil-novelist | @sam-glade | @drabbleitout | @rhikasa | @oh-no-another-idea | @anthros-vintas-archive

I'm going to do The City is Ours for this one because I'm currently thinking about it :). Under the cut because it got LONG XD.

One word to describe your wip:

Chaos. That's chaos with a capital C in bold letters.

Two lines that are your favorite:

No, don't make my choose between my babies! Ok as of right now reading back over the stuff I've written, here's two I love:

(Kylee's POV) They quickly shut down her phone in horror, hoping that the cutoff of signal would be enough. She covered their mouth, stifling a sob of- well, a lot of things.

(Asher's POV) Asher bit his lip, everything in him screaming to not let Damian go back into that horde of gangsters alone and undercover. It was so incredibly dangerous even he wouldn’t do that or allow one of his teammates to do that.

Three times you cried while writing:

I don't cry while I'm writing, I just laugh evily >:D. So instead, here are some times that my readers will scream and cry and curse my name into the wind :)))

When Asher's boyfriend Damian is revealed to be the anti-hero vigilante working for the super villians/Damian's cover gets blown and the supervillains torture him and live stream it back to the heroes :D

When the Snow Queen's identity is revealed and it's someone the heroes know very well :)))

The details of Chase's backstory and his mom being revealed in canon :)))

Four excerpts of feelings from your characters:

1. (Damian's POV) Asher asked, “How did you get burned? I didn’t see you get injured during that fight.” Wincing a bit as he shifted, Damian explained, “I’m sure it was an accident, Jason hit me with a fireball. It’s weird though, no goons or anybody was anywhere near me, so he missed by a long shot-” Asher’s eyes widened, and he jumped up, storming out into the hall. “Jason!” The hallway filled with angry yelling, mostly Asher cussing him out in Spanish.

2. (V's POV) The prison transport rumbled through the city streets, escorted by two cop cars front and back. All of them were handcuffed with chains leading to the floor. All eight of them were sat shoulder to shoulder, and either glared at each other or avoided gazes entirely. They’d taken Kylee’s phone and since she was handcuffed, she just glared at people or stared out the tiny barred window. The tech genius or hacker- Chase, V remembered his name being- was nervously picking at his fingers until they bled. Then he spoke, voice so quiet the others almost missed it. “They’re gonna try to take off our masks aren’t they?” The one with ice powers- V never caught their name- said, “Well shit.” Finally, everyone was looking at each other without glaring or itching to start bickering. No one could see their faces, and cops were especially a no-go.

3. (Asher's POV) The others were currently outside keeping Boss Lady and her cronies occupied, leaving the building mostly defenseless. Asher had taken care of the remaining goons pretty quickly, and probably given them permanent blindness from the bright flash of his powers. He usually never went that far but… Well, this was his boyfriend they were talking about. “Are you sure he’s here?” Asher asked, blood rushing in his ears and an icy hand closing around his heart. “I’ve been tracking the movements in and out of this building for a while now,” Chase said, “And I also hacked the cameras for some… footage… that I don’t think you want to see.” Asher swallowed and nodded. If that horrifying live stream they’d seen was any indication… Well, he didn’t want to know how bad it’d gotten in the couple days it had taken to scour the city for where they were keeping Damian. 

4. (Chase's POV) Kylee let out a frustrated huff, “That’s too long.” “Not my problem,” Chase shrugged. There was a rush of air, and the remote was gone from its spot where Chase had left it. They set down their project and jumped up, letting out a slew of Romanian curses. “HEY! KYLEE YOU LITTLE-!” They whipped around and found Kylee standing on the other side of the room. She held the remote and twirled it mockingly with two fingers and stuck her tongue out at him with a smirk.

Five Tropes featured:

Found Family BUT they're all dumbasses

Enemies AND Lovers/It's Complicated and Lovers

Chaotic teenagers with superpowers

Villain arcs, villain redemption arcs, and a villain arc INTO a redemption arc

Tragic hero(es)

~

TCIO Taglist: @friendlyneighborhood-writer @jessica-writes22 @rose-bookblood @yejidoesthings @space-writes @cljordan-imperium (send me a message to be +/- from the taglist <3)

[gay-jesus-probably]

So like, last night I stumbled upon your discussions of why a lot of TOTK’s whole… everything is messed up, and it had me thinking about it so much I had troubled sleeping afterwards. So uh, thanks for that lol (/lh). In all seriousness, your takes on how imperialist Hyrule is in this game, how much less like unique cultures the various towns feel like, Ganondorf being both completely flat and also seemingly not meant to be, and how weird it is that Zelda is back in power really put into words a lot of thoughts that had been nagging at me as I’ve been playing. Like, the amount to which the writing has suffered from BOTW is staggering when you actually lay out the problems. Out of curiosity, do you have any idea what the fuck happened? Like did the writing team change? The game had so much potential, as seen by the numerous fan theories/AUs etc. So what went wrong?

Honestly? I have no idea. I'm not usually that big on behind the scenes stuff anyways, and I'll be real here, I went into this game pretty much 100% blind - I didn't even watch any of the trailers, I knew NOTHING about TOTK except from a few details I absorbed from hearing other people talk about online (basically, I knew Ganondorf was going to show up as a talking corpse, Link would lose an arm, and the Master Sword would get rekt).

I rarely buy games as soon as they come out anyways tbh; I can only think of three games that I've actually gone out of my way to get as soon as possible after their release, and that was the 3DS remakes of Superstar Saga and Bowsers Inside Story (two of my favourite games ever, and Superstar Saga having literally been my first RPG), and I picked up the Mario 3D All Stars collection on launch day as a favour to my older sibling (who was stuck at work), and got one for myself in the process. The only reason I bought TOTK like a week after its release was because one of our dogs was literally days away from having a puppy, and so I knew that the next few weeks of my life would be entirely dedicated to keeping the other two dogs busy, assisting mom with the newborn puppy, and just generally being on call to provide literally anything mom needed as soon as she needed it. Which meant a lot of sitting around waiting to be required, and I'd need something to do that I could easily pause at a moments notice. So... new video game seemed a good way to fill the hang time.

And it was a good call, like I said, I've been having loads of fun with this game. There's a reason I've almost got 300 hours of gameplay, and it's not (just) because I haven't had anything better to do in between taking care of dog stuff (though that number is somewhat inflated due to me leaving it open and paused for hours at a time while busy with dog stuff). It's just that the story is a fucking mess.

As for what happened with the story... I have no idea. I've seen some people suggest that they might have been planning something a little more ambitious, and then technical limitations forced them to walk it back, so the story had to be hastily reworked to match. And I've heard that the abilities in TOTK were just ideas they had for BOTW that they couldn't fit in, which honestly I can see - the abilities are cool and all, but let's be real here, they aren't nearly as distinct as the BOTW runes. Magnesis, Cryonis, Stasis and Remote Bombs were unique powers with different uses in different areas; now the powerset is just Recall, Get Around Slightly Faster, Ultrahand, Ultrahand But In Your Inventory, and Ultrahand But Faster. But I don't know if that's actually the case.

But honestly, I really don't know why the writing is so awful. To be fair, some of it is definitely just the English translation team shitting the bed - like come on, they didn't need to have Sidon and Yona repeatedly exchange the exact same line about how he's scared she'll die like Mipha. They could have at least changed the fucking wording to make it sound more natural. And I know that other translation teams managed to inject some more nuance into the story - the French translation actually managed to call Rauru on his imperialist bullshit! For the throne room scene, they had Ganon refer to Rauru with 'vous', the formal form of 'you', but Rauru refers to Ganon with 'tu', the informal form of 'you'. 'Tu' is for use in casual settings or between friends, and if someone is using 'vous' for you, referring to them with 'tu' is a MASSIVE insult; it's very condescending, and implies that you have literally no respect for that person whatsoever, but they should continue treating you as a figure of great authority. To sort of translate that into an English equivalent, it'd be like if Ganon walked into that scene using formal language and referring to Rauru as a fellow King, and Rauru responded by treating Ganon like a small, dumb child. Hugely insulting. Also the vous/tu disparity has a History with French colonialism, so that adds some implications as to what Hyrule's really doing with their 'allies'. And in the scene where Ganon takes the secret stone, the French translation has him say Rauru tried to force him to submit, which is an outright accusation of imperialism (as opposed to the English saying Rauru wanted to control Ganon, which suggests the problem was Rauru thinking he could find a peaceful solution instead of just executing a foreign leader for thought crimes)

So the english translation definitely had the room to put some more nuance into things if the team had wanted to; honestly I kind of wish I knew Japanese so I could compare it to the original script and see if any of the problems I've been bitching about were part of the script from the start, or if the English translators were just particularly bad. But Nintendo is a very conservative company, and Japan is a very conservative country with a serious nationalism problem, so I kind of doubt it, especially since the game portrays Hyrule pretty much the exact same way that Japan is portrayed in propaganda justifying their own imperialism. That... does not suggest the English team went apeshit. That suggests that the awful shit was in the script from the start, and the English team was just totally on board with it.

As for the writing teams... I mean, to be fair it's been like seven years, of course the writing team isn't the exact same as BOTW. But honestly, the main issue is just that they've recycled a lot of old problems from the Zelda games, and somehow stripped them of what little nuance they had before. Like, Ganondorf trying to take over Hyrule because Evil has been an issue since Ocarina of Time (which this game was clearly heavily pulling from), but even though OoT never told us he had a deeper motive, the worldbuilding still showed exactly why he would have such an issue with Hyrule. We knew there had been a bloody civil war only about a decade before Ganon's takeover, we knew that the Gerudo were treated with disdain by Hyrule, and we saw that Hyrule's alliances with the Gorons and Zora were pretty flimsy, and neither race felt like Hyrule actually gave a damn about them. But most importantly of all, OoT gave us the Shadow Temple, a horrific prison meant to inflict unspeakable torture on its captives... all on orders from the Hylian royal family. Hyrule's hands were never clean. We weren't supposed to side with Ganon in OoT, but we were shown a long list of reasons for why he was so pissed off.

Someone else said that TOTK feels like a retelling of OoT that's just pro-Hyrule propaganda, and that's a pretty good summary. I don't know what the fuck Nintendo was thinking, but honestly it kind of seems like they're trying to stick to the formula of Zelda games at all costs, while also making the entire game just a huge 'gotcha' to all the fans that have spent the last 25 years seeing Ganondorf as a sympathetic character with depth and reasonable motivations. I find it ironic that they decided to include the Wind Waker boomerang and shield in the game, considering that the whole game feels like an attempt to get everyone to forget Wind Waker ever happened. That's still the most human we've ever gotten to see Ganondorf - he didn't have many lines in that game, but the ones he did have mattered. At the end of the day, WW Ganondorf wanted to have a better life for his people, and he knew Hyrule would never let that happen. But now apparently Ganon just wants to dropkick puppies into woodchippers, and he doesn't give the slightest hint of a fuck about trying to wipe out the Gerudo people entirely by attacking them with an endless sandstorm plus zombie apocalypse. His only character trait is Evil.

If I want to get really cynical for a minute here, I think it's basically just a cash grab. If your game prompts a moral debate, then it can offend people, which means they won't want to give you money for it. But if it's a simple black and white conflict with no nuance, the fans will love all the right characters in the right way, and everyone will love hyrule and want to see more of it! It's like the fucking MCU; they're not willing to tell a fresh story, or make any serious commentary. They just want something safe and formulaic that has been statistically proven to make money. Fucking cowards.

[majaloveschris]

She really said that? I don't remember this. It's funny how she hates him and his fans, but of course when they provide "rumors" or "gossips," they come in handy so she can have more clicks./:

So I listened to her timeline last night and she is something else. First, her voice is irritating and grating, just no. I couldn’t listen to an entire hour of that.

But second: so she says she was fed information about Evans not dating someone in the business over the spring of 2021, but that’s when Baptista followed him back. She left that follow out. But she said she was getting emails from this woman’s friend talking her all about this “relationship” so that’s how she knew it was true. Not his side, the girls side.

So she went on saying once NYE 1.0 happened, she started to think okay, maybe. Even though no one saw the group split from the other group, she was told he was walking around with an unknown brunette in Vegas, but again, no pics.

Then she said the dust settles and we hear nothing, but she’s being sent all sorts of blinds about him and women in ATL, so she thinks they’re obviously fake, but maybe not, but that’s why she NEVER posted those blinds…🙄

Fast forward to the announcement dropping and the pap walk: LITERALLY the only reason she gives for believing this is real and that she’s now suddenly on team real relationship is the pap walk pictures. According to her, Evans is sooooooooo private. He would NEVEE hire a pap to take pictures of him.

So here’s the thing: we all thought she was getting paid to flip. No. She’s just an idiot who wanted clicks and interactions, and what better way to accomplish that than taking a very beloved actor who she’s admitted she’s never gotten any information from him or his side, and talk about their largest story to date. But also: if she’s being fed anything, it’s from Baptista’s side. She knew an awful lot about her, Justin, and Joana

Thanks for listening and writing it down; I couldn't get myself to do it.

So she basically received emails from that girl's friend, whom he was dating? I guess this was the East Coast girl, the one from Boston, or are we talking about three entirely different people, because this whole thing is confusing. In any case, I'm suspicious of the whole friend thing. I don't know if she actually received any evidence that this whole relationship is true or if she just basically believed a random somebody's email, because everybody can say their friend is dating him. I always found it surreal that she believes almost everything people say to her. She doesn't try to fact-check anything. It's not like people can only tell the truth, and somebody like her with more than a million followers, I think, should be more careful about the things she shares. I understand that she gets a lot of emails, anons, etc., but she should at least check those that are a little bit more serious.

It's so unbelievable that she, who doesn't really care if the things she shares are true or not or even if they don't make any sense, didn't want to share a story about Chris's love life, especially during the 2022 spring and summer, when a lot of people talked about him and Alba.

She knows that this isn't the first time Chris has done a pap walk, right? Or how does she imagine this? The pap was hiding in a random spot in New York, and they happened to walk past him. She is right that Chris would never hire one, because it's probably his team that calls the pap.

He is so private, which she's stated several times now, but somehow she still has information about his love life.

I don't know if she realizes how much bullshit she's been saying or if she simply thinks her followers are so stupid they don't realize that she contradicts herself all the time

[gothamstreetcat]

Putting under the cut what ended up being such a long sad/angry rant about Wesley and how he was treated on the show. I just want to say how I feel. A lot of this is personal and I apologize.

I’ve been thinking a lot over the past few days about how it really boils my blood that I feel there was so much pressure for Wesley to be in love with Fred. If he was not "in love" (I really don't even want to say that) with her he had to be a creep and if not that he had to be obsessed (based off of how the show was really portraying him at points). It’s almost as if he had no value unless he was in love with her or his entire being didn’t revolve around her. Like, if he wasn’t the bumbling fool for everyone to make fun off he just had to be so obsessed to the points it made him look bad. Almost as though the writers took his little "crush" from one fucking episode and decided to run a train without the tracks.

It's such a shame because this idea of Wesley being infatuated with Fred came across as though it had to be his whole personality as though Wesley himself couldn't be loved for anything else (like being smart or funny). And the entirety surrounding Fred was also used as a foil for his relationship with Lilah, which in my opinion is so stupid, because this crush with Fred was -again- so fleeting and ended so badly, yet at the same time it consumes Wesley's being.

And I know I’ve said this in the past, but Wesley during Billy was not him; and I really believe it has everything to do with his father and how he was raised and someone he was scared to become. Wesley does not come off to me as the kind of person to feel that was towards women or have monstrous/evil thoughts. Even for "dark" Wesley that's really pushing it. He's just the kind of guy "that makes the tough decisions even if he's making them alone." Not only that but Wesley constantly has moments where you know he's been abused, and for me, I see that as he's not going to be an abuser because he's already the abused, even as an adult. Even when his not-dad showed up he fell back into his old self and was suddenly never good enough. So, going back Billy it just seems hard for me to imagine Wesley ever trying again after the traumatic events that ensued for him - that also had him struggling with himself as a person. Having him be so infatuated with Fred after this - to me - is just so disrespectful to his character, especially if only to hurt him in the end and further isolate him. Wesley is not a perfect person, I know that but some of the shit he went though on the show just seemed over the top.

I don't actually know or personally understand why people even want Wesley and Fred to be together but let me say how I've been feeling that Fred is just a more loved version of Wesley - another thing that really makes me upset/uncomfortable. They were both smart but somehow Fred was smarter (during that episode when those demons came and wanted her brain instead of Wesley's) yet, at the same time everyone needed Wesley's help when he wasn't part of the team anymore. Which, of course there are different ways to smart and should be recognized but at the same time Fred was just seen as so cute and quirky for everything she did while other times Wesley was not appreciated. Anytime Fred became upset or triggered over what happened to her she was comforted and emphasized with. When she was rescued from Pylea she was given space and everyone worked with her and tried to help her. Anytime Wesley talked about his dad he was looked at as strange or talked to in such a casual manor (because the characters were so bluntly blind to his abuse (i.e when he killed his not-dad in season five). Even when he was clearly feeling a certain way after the events in “Lineage” Angel and Spike treated it as if it was no big deal and I get the assumption that when Wesley killed his not-dad it was more about protecting Fred rather then freeing himself (which is what it should have fucking been about. This man literally stood in front of him and said “don’t make me shoot you,” and I wonder how many threats were made on Wesley’s life for him to not be stunned by that.)

I will however say that when Wesley got shot he was well loved and cared for. This was, of course pre-Fred and pre-Conner but was looked after during this time (by this two best friends I might add who ended up fucking losing completely to the mess that is season 3).

Another thing I've gathered from the grapevine is that it appears losing Fred was somehow a breaking point for Wesley (but also everyone else too) and I would really like to fucking understand why. Fred is beloved, I get that but at the same time they also lost Cordelia who was very loved and had some so far as a person - and as for Wesley that man has been through some fucking shit, but why is losing Winifred some make or break for him?? Wesley literally lost his entire family because of what happened, he had his throat cut and was literally fucking dying as some homeless man dragged him into the bushes before stealing his money. He was so cut off from everyone and pretty much had the metaphorical door slammed in his face - unless of course he was needed - and I know I talk about the park scene a lot, and I know fans get mad over what Wesley did they're entitled to feel that way, of course, but at the same time - no one is going to be more mad at Wesley then the self-loathing man himself. He knows he screewed up.

On top of that, Angel, everyone's literal champion, went to the hospital and tried to fucking kill him. And a lot of people point out how Wesley never apologized for what he did, but when Angel apologized for what he did it was literally only because he needed something. And everyone was so wrapped around Angel's dick and what he wanted so nothing could be mended, mind you, this was also the man that signed them off to work for the literal Devil without their consent. Now, I get he was doing it for his son and that's admirable- he's just a tired dad trying to do his very best - but you literally didn't have to drag everyone else with you (especially since the only reason Wesley was there in the first place was to give Lilah peace he believed she deserved for her suffering. Show me a greater act of true love and I'll shut the fuck up.)

Wesley lost his best friend to the higher powers (his friendship with Gunn was so long gone at this point) and the love of his life (because the only time Wesley wasn't so wrapped up in Fred was when he was grieving Lilah) but somehow Fred had to be the be all end all. Even in his death he couldn't escape it and it still had to be about Fred and being lied to and being with her. I see a lot of fans talk about how he was in love with the idea of Fred and being a hero and getting the girl and finally being loved but in reality all those things Wesley thinks heroes get in the end are a fantasy. He's not going to be loved, Angel is not going to get over Conner and his dad is never going to love and respect him as a human being. In fact, I feel like the only thing Wesley had to resemble being a hero was the fact that he died in the end. I mean, of course he was a good person and did his best and he did help people and save them - but at the same time he went through so much shit just to die in the very end and he couldn't even have that to himself.

The Writers liked to put on this face of Wesley being happy when he sees Fred doing her little speech, and it could have easily been about missing his friends and missing people he was close to but we know that's not the case. Not only that, but Wesley went through something so traumatic and you can't always some back from that. He was literally so changed from what happened to him and he was never the same (he literally reminds me of Bruce Wayne in so many ways with the trauma and the turtlenecks and the stone facial expressions; they literally are the same person only Bruce hates guns). Even when he came back into the group or went to work for W&H and everything was erased. Yet somehow Fred just has to be what keeps him connected to something more human... and I really can't understand why when The Writers (I mean, obviously to hurt Wesley because they don't value him) would even want Wesley to be with someone who is so nasty to him.

Fred was understanding when her and Gunn were ransacking Wesley's apartment (which they didn't even clean up by the way) yet, to his face she told him never to come back and also didn't even look at him when she talked about the prophecy being false and everything being a waste of time. Telling Wesley how wrong he was but literally everyone makes mistakes (Angel literally said Conner had been smelling like food and fucking told no one until he had a meltdown). Wesley during that time was just mentally going through it and he didn't think he could tell anyone and did everything he thought he could do - and then for Fred to be upset with him for fucking being with Lilah when he was literally so alone and she was the only one to give him a crumb of human decency. She really only bothered him about the job once and every time they talked you could tell how much they really bounced off one another.

Fred was also the only one who was so mean to him after Lilah's death when he was being vulnerable and trying to open up to her. Now again, this is partly The Writers who think it's okay to compare Wesley's consensual relationship with Lilah to Not-Cordelia sleeping with Conner (which was basically Conner being raped by his unborn woman child using his mother's body), which is disgusting, but also for Fred to fucking roll her eyes and try to gaslight Wesley and his emotions when he's being vulnerable. Again, something I bitch about a lot but it's only because I know what it's like to be that person being vulnerable to their friends, only to have said friends literally roll their eyes and dismiss my feelings - it's disgusting. Wesley had literally just lost Lilah and had no one to talk to about it but he tried *twice* with two people who used to be his closest friends. But I guess that is just more of a way to affirm how Lilah is for Wesley (despite the fact that she is literally perfect for him but I don't know if I want to get into that now).

I feel like Angel never got over Conner (it being mentioned in season five) and that is what it is - I get it, but at the same time I'm also so bothered by the fact that Wesley is always going to have this big terrible thing hung over him. Gunn also made a huge mistake but that was what is was, a mistake and okay because "Gunn is a good person" (and I'm okay with that, I'm in no way trying to shit on Gunn but I am aware there was controversy surround this back when the show was on). However, I have an issue with Wesley having to be so punished for his mistake when others are empathized with. And I know what happened with Holtz was about Angelus and that Angel has a soul and he is good - but this is also the vampire with a soul who tried to fucking suffocate Wesley to death. It doesn't feel fair to entirely blame Angel for Angelus's actions against Holtz's family's, However, that's still a huge part of his past, and not everyone is going to have empathy and compassion for you just because you have a soul. I'm not trying to say that as a way to excuse Wesley's mistake but I feel that so much is always put on Wesley and him alone.

I'm sorry this post is so long and messy. I was going to spend a little bit of time talking about his relationship with Lilah, however, I want this to be more about Wesley as an individual - so I'll shut up here and save that conversation for the tags.

This was four pages long in google docs, why can't I write my fanfiction like that?

[loregoddess]

For the ask game thing, Alfred x Alear?

when I started shipping it if I did: I'm a huge fan of friends-to-lovers, and also I like the idea of Alfred getting to live a long, happy life, so I became partial to this ship pretty early on. Alfred would have been the character I had Alear marry my first run if I hadn't already decided to go for Pandreo. (I, notably, went into Engage entirely blind, and therefore did Not know about Alfred's solo ending).

my thoughts: It's a cute ship! I like it a lot! I really love how Alfred and Alear's friendship starts off, with Alfred and his family/retainers being there for Alear from the get-go, but also how their supports show their relationship evolving, because like, up to this point Alfred's "friendship" with Alear was a bit one-sided due to the whole "that is a god you pray to who has been asleep since forever" changing to "aw shit, they're awake and an actual person, not just a symbol" and this means there are some bumps and hiccups at first because Alfred doesn't really know Alear or know Alear's boundaries, but Alear's pretty good at communicating "Hey, you don't need to play music in the dead of night or do all these things to be my friend, actually please don't do these things" and while Alfred is pretty self-critical at first thinking he messed up, the two are able to talk things out and iron out the misunderstandings (yay for healthy communication). So yeah, anytime I come across a relationship that wasn't 100% smooth sailing all the time, but with communication still worked in the long run is a relationship I usually enjoy a lot.

What makes me happy about them: These two feel like they embody a certain kind of chaotic, unbridled energy, and a shared joy and zest for life, plus they're both so supportive of the other.

What makes me sad about them: You know that thing that occurs late-game with Alear? That spoiler thing that happens over Ch21-22? You know how much Alfred cherishes life bc of his own poor health and how much he strives to live no matter what, and how he also wants his friends to live no matter what? Yeah sometimes I think about how Alfred must have felt through that entire event sequence, and the aftermath of it as well.

things done in fanfic that annoys me: I don't read enough fanfic to answer this.

things I look for in fanfic: Re: lack of fanfic reading. I do have mad respect for fanartists who draw these two (whether as a ship or just individually) bc holy shit Engage's designs are was harder to draw than they first appear, and I have seen some of the prettiest, coolest Alear and Alfred fanarts out there.

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: Alear works with almost everyone, although I'm partial to Pandreo and Yunaka as partners for Alear. But I also like Alear's dynamics with a lot of the other royals and the retainer characters as well. Alear's one of the most shippable characters from the game honestly.

I don't have as many romantic ships for Alfred (although I've seen enough fanart of Alfred x Rafal to appreciate it as a rarepair), but I do like how many platonic relationships Alfred has, he really befriends like, half the army though sheer sincerity alone.

My happily ever after for them: The canon ending for Alear and Alfred is a good one, I love that Alfred gets to live a full life, even if he still doesn't live on the same time scale as Alear will live.

who is the big spoon/little spoon: Alfred insists on being the big spoon, except when he's too tired then Alear becomes the big spoon.

what is their favorite non-sexual activity: Just, being together and doing things together, and enjoying life and their time together to the fullest. I think both would also become the sort of rulers who go out and visit their people a lot, and they do so together often, so both Alfred and Alear become very popular with the people of Firene and Lythos, and I imagine stories of their antics (that couple who's So In Love with each other, but also extremely energetic when they go out and do anything together) are passed down for a few generations in each country.

[doriandistortion]

My favorite post on Letterboxd

I can’t explain how much this means to me

By reibureibu

Reviewing The Man Who Sleeps

After graduating college I thought I had things figured out. I had a paid internship that provided housing and other interns as roommates, at a maritime museum that was next to the ocean. Every day I woke up to my seaside surroundings and interacted with all kinds of people both indoors and outdoors, and every week we visited another museum to learn more about the field and just hang out as a group. In retrospect, that was one of the best periods of my life; certainly it was one of the most vibrant, and meaningful.

Though I wouldn't know it at the time, what I did next was the complete antithesis. I essentially worked a miscellaneous office job, doing whatever leftover tasks were necessary that no one else wanted to do. I had coworkers I never connected with no matter what I did, and I became even lonelier with how a few came so close (I still wish them well, they were really good people. And so I came home with the daylight all spent to a shabby floor I shared with two other people. They were terrible at cleaning. They also claimed the living room. So I spent all my time locked in my small room just staring at a screen that bathed the space sickly white, until it was too late to get any restful sleep.

This job was temporary so after a while it ended, but I still had a few months left on my housing contract. So instead of spending that time being productive like I promised my parents, my friends, and most importantly myself, I spent that time delving even deeper into exile.

I never left the house (I barely left my room) and the only thing I ever did was find momentary escapes from my increasing anxiety. Video-games I took no pleasure in, books I never read, music I listened to once... honestly I couldn't even really tell you specifics because I barely remember anything at all.

The few times I went outside was a haze, like stepping outside into a bright, blinding fog that took every ounce of will just to put one foot forward over the other.

Nothing felt real; nothing seemed real. The time spent outdoors warped like the paint on my walls. So I went back inside. At least there time stood still.

And when I ran out of all the food I had in the fridge, I just started ordering delivery online. And I ordered a lot, so I could eat a lot, because eating was the only thing that still gave me pleasure. And by ordering so much I had food for days; you'd be surprised how long pizza (and pasta, and burgers, and anything fried, and-) can last at room temperature.

Yeah, it's disgusting. I was disgusting. I just had containers of food lying around on the floor so I could eat it whenever I needed to feel something, anything; I probably smelled like stale grease all the time, plus I had no motivation to shower at all; I was unemployed and unproductive, wasting all my money on stuff I didn't need to buy that only gave me fleeting moments of joy; I stayed up all night feeling like a soulless husk so I could wake up with the next day already almost gone; and I stopped talking to all my friends and family, because suddenly that phone became too heavy to lift when I needed to text one of them back.

I guess that sounds like mavbe I had depression. I don't know. I think you rarely know when you do. At the time, it all just seemed so... normal. How different normal was then, compared to when I was at sea.

"It is on a day like this one, a little later, a little earlier, that you discover, without surprise, that something is wrong, that you don't know how to live and that you never will. Something has broken."

That's the story of The Man Who Sleeps, or at least, my story of when I was most asleep. The film ends, right there, at the absolute nadir of despair. The period when things are at their utter worst, yet, paradoxically, when one is at their most accepting of it. Perhaps it's because that's when we succumb to it entirely, at an uneasy peace now that we've renounced all else.

But I won't end it here, no, because that's not where my story ends.

If you told me at the time that I would get better, I wouldn't have believed you. If you told me at the time that I would start enjoying hobbies again, I wouldn't have believed you. If you told me at the time that I would reconnect with my loved ones, I wouldn't have believed you. And if you told me at the time that I would find any sense of worth in myself and my life, I especially, vehemently, would never have believed you.

But I did. I woke up. I am no longer asleep.

[cavityinmybrain]

its kinda cathartic to have moved back into my abusive parents house after having been out of it for so long (almost a whole year i believe, i moved back out of necessity), which sounds weird to say but hear me out.

even though my stepdad is still abusing me and my mom is continuing to enable it, i finally am able to recognize the cycle of abuse they've been putting me through nearly to a T. i have the words to describe whats happening to me. im able to see events that have happened in the past, even ones that are happening now, and im able to point out the bits and details of them and reflect. and while that doesn't make it perfect, i am still being abused obviously, it makes it feel almost better because i now know what i have to do in order to keep myself safe.

i'll go into more detail of this under the cut but it's going to have mentions of specific instances of abuse i have faced. i figured if reading my reflection on how i've been abused could help anyone, that it will find the people it'll help. please keep yourself safe and heed the trigger warning.

tw: emotional abuse mention (detailed), cycle of abuse talk (identifying the stages in a specific instance of abuse)

my stepdad emotionally abuses me. kinda obvious, i already stated that. my mom enables this abuse by turning a complete blind eye and denying it entirely, which in it of itself isn't specifically abuse but silence is violence. the fact that she allows my stepdad to do the things he does to me and she simply takes a passive role ("i wasn't there so i don't know what happened", "im not picking sides", "im not getting involved" etc etc.) means that she is also actively abusing me. that doesn't even mention the extreme amounts of gaslighting she uses against me to try to invalidate the experiences i have had at my stepdads hands.

yesterday brought all this to light for me because of a specific incident. i had been on the phone with my boyfriend, preparing to clean my "room" (a sectioned off area in our basement) when he had come downstairs to do laundry. as i was getting up to clean, my stepdad started speaking to me and said "after i get the dog poop, you're going to come help me and the boys (my brothers) pick up sticks." i replied, "no im not, im about to clean my room." he began to get agitated very quickly, and because i've experienced years of treatment similar to this i was also extremely agitated.

quick piece of context, my parents have kicked me out multiple times for long periods of time. every time i had been kicked out and came back, they basically denied having kicked out at all and tried to make it seem like i had left of my own accord. this is gaslighting. i just moved back into their house after about half a year of living in a group home and with my moms father and then my moms mother, all three of the places i stayed this time i believe caused me more problems than i had before. in total, being kicked out repeatedly by my parents has caused me noticeable trauma relating to my living situation. the fear of being kicked out follows me no matter where i go and live.

the next sentence my stepdad said during the sticks argument was, "it's things like this that'll get you living like you were before." while thats not a direct threat at my living situation, it is still a threat to kick me out. the statement directly implied that my not helping was going to result in kicking me out. i held it together until he had gotten upstairs again and i immediately burst into tears and started settling into a panic attack.

i texted my mom and asked her to come talk to me about something because i was in so much distress and had become so unregulated that i needed to ask for help. she got downstairs and through tears i explained to her what happened, the first thing she said was "why is your room so messy? i've been telling you to clean for three days." she then proceeded to say she would talk to him about it and went upstairs, and that was expected to be the end of it for her. i had the worst panic attack i've had in years after i was alone and on the phone with my boyfriend, he ended up providing the emotional compassion i needed in that moment. after i had calmed down from the brunt of the panic attack, i went upstairs to talk to my mom about the event. the only thing she said about it was, "stepdad didn't threaten to kick you out." she brushed it off completely, not even listening to me and physically walking away from me a few times. later that night, everything was "fine" between my stepdad and i and he tried showing me some funny videos on his phone. when i went inside from the attempted talking to my mom, i boiled over. i screamed something or the other, hit a wall, went downstairs, and then continued to kick the wall while yelling.

in this incident, i can point out the four cycles of abuse very easily. tensions building - he told me to help pick up sticks and i tried to explain i was about to do something else. incident - he threatens to kick me out and my mom enables it. reconciliation - mom telling me it wasn't as bad as i had perceived ("he didnt threaten to kick you out"). calm - everything is back to normal.

because of the years of abuse i have faced similar to this, i do something called reactive abuse. reactive abuse is when the victim of abuse gets pushed to a breaking point and they lash out during incidents of abuse, the abuser then uses this as leverage to say that the victim is actually the abuser. its a vicious and painful cycle, one that my parents have been putting me through for my entire life. if you get abused in a similar way and react similarly to me, i want you to know that you are not abusive. being pushed to such an unregulated state where you lash out is a sign of abuse being committed against you. its not your fault.

while this post didn't really have a solid point and was mostly me reflecting on my personal situation, i really hope someone gets something out of this. whether that be courage to label what their going through as abuse or the ability to think critically about their situation and start identifying their cycle of abuse. i hope anyone that has reached this point takes care of themselves, maybe do a couple acts of self care.

be kind to yourself.

[rainydaylately]

❥ 𝙜𝙤𝙙 𝙞𝙨 𝙖 𝙬𝙤𝙢𝙖𝙣 ❥

❥ 𝙚𝙡𝙞 𝙨𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙮 𝙭 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧 𝙣𝙨𝙛𝙬 ❥

❥ author's note: HI BICHES welcome to the first fic for this page!!!! i havent many like “request here” type of post but that’ll be up soon but i will be taking request for any paul dano characters + more real soon!!! hope y’all enjoy freaks heart emoji

❥ summary: the town is a bunch of chismosos and shit talk you but who tf cares tbh, eli thinks ur moms a hoe sike ur the hoe and "cleanses" you

❥ warnings: hardcore sex *hearteyes* u also bitch slap eli sunday, fem afab reader i can also make a amab or genderneutral if yall want xoxo gossip girl

it was always a wonder to you on how the church functioned the way it did, scriptures and prayers almost yelled out enough for the heavens to hear with curious ears. definitely, there was really nothing else to do in the meek and dull town residing in scorching california. practically every day the entire town would pass into the church, praying and crying and screaming out to the man in the clouds to help them. forgive them, odd how many were yelled at. begging on their knees for forgiveness like starving dog wishing and slobbering for just a bite of meat.

perhaps it was for the better, a new look for a quaint town. church was always there and welcomed all, but you found it best to keep yourself away from the aura that nipped at you. leaving imaginary stings as it just felt, off. often, you'd walk past the church whenever you went out in town to run daily errands. politely giving sweet "hellos" and "goodbyes" before running off with your group of friends that you adored for days and nights full of gleam and laughter.

nothing grew in the deserted earth of the town, but when you were out having fun it felt like a field of tulips in bloom. standing proud and tall for the sunshine to expose their happiness.

at this age finally leaving adolescence and entering adulthood would be a grand experience, one where you would explore willingly. of course, many people liked to spread rumors about the many townsfolk going out late at night and not coming back till the next day. deeming them "wild" and "improper," funny how many of the most judgmental souls are in reality controlling hypocrites who hide behind the bible.

the older townsfolk had the biggest mouths though, coming up to you with a concerned look on their face. aged hands taking yours with their finger pads stroking against soft skin only to mask their words that wanted to dig under your skin. thick skin being the result of those snobby and back handed compliments, but the one time that your blood began to boil was the comment, "a lady like you needs to slow down, go find yourself a husband to calm you. eli sunday has yet to have a woman of his own, why don't you head by the church for him."

now, in religious practices everyone is taught not to hate, love thyself or whatever eli sunday has mentioned, but you know damn well eli sunday hated you and your guts.

well perhaps you shouldn't have called him a blind sheep leading the herd off a cliff but really that's what he was attempting to do, and successfully doing so as the herd of sheep yelled and threw insults at you. shaming and ridiculing you as you walked out of the chapel that day on an unfortunate afternoon.

but besties that, you never fancied eli sunday or try to talk to him or any of that nonsense. you had your own life and he had his own strange life following the word of a novel that has been altered generation after generation.

once the town began spreading their rumors about you, you never batted your eyelashes. whispers and murmurs whenever you passed by. words spreading like wild fire to the devil's ears, and this devil was eli sunday.

painting himself not to be nosy, he walked up to two elders in the middle of a conversation after mass.

"oh my apologizes, was i interrupting you two?" eli softly asks, like poisoned honey imitating sweetness when in secret is actually lethal.

"goodness no eli, we were just discussing about that girl running around the streets at night. [name] she is, you remember her, yes?"

he nods with a gentle bow, "yes i remember quite well actually," smugly remembering the memories of your snappy remarks as he chuckled to himself.

"that girl has been possessed by a demon," another man joined.

"oh don't be so rude, she's young!" a woman walks into the circle.

"all the more lethal!" an old man shouted.

"now now there no need to yell about this," eli raised his arms up to mellow down the crowd that assembled.

"but eli she's a devil woman!" many of the crowd agreed. conspiring numerous rumors and lies about you and what you were doing all night out.

truly, you weren't doing anything wrong. going out dancing at night, picking fun of overly drunk men at the bars as they attempted to flirt with you before practically passing out on whisky. even just running down the creek with your friends to raise the fabrics of your dresses and pants to step into the water. finding rocks to throw into the water. but alas, many of the judgmental received their kicks in tearing down others but frankly that would never happen. you'd be damned before anyone laid a hand on you.

finally returning after the eventful night, you quietly walked into your house with the scent of fresh bakery from the kitchen. a lovely morning filled with the fresh spring breeze, summer just right by and you debated how you would handle california's hell season with the blistering sun.

you walked to your mother and greeted her with a hug, asking how she was during the time you were gone. you two sat at the dinner table eating the warm pastries as she filled you with all the information.

though, her face shifted. questioning her she responded.

"i've heard about what the towns people are saying about you," she pauses whilst you set down a pastry and folded your hands, "i'm just worried about you."

"worried why? you know the town is only saying things to get some sort of kick," you reply in mostly disbelief towards your mother.

"i know honey," she caressed your hand, "and you know i want whats best for you and for nothing to every happen to you right" you nod.

"well that's why i arranged for eli sunday to have a meeting with you! nothing odd just a short session to rid anything...if anything is there at least!" her tone was laced in sweetness to not upset you. but to have eli sunday? eli sunday who's head looks too big to stand on his neck come and do what? prance around you while shouting a paragraph from the book of lies? hard pass.

it would be an absolute honor for eli sunday to rid of all the sin and evil from your body, in his mind he knew there was some sort of demon inside of you to make you refuse to attend church and choose fun over christ. reading that allowed would definitely sound strange. oh and do not read this text around any hardcore religious adults, fair warning bozos.

eli's hair neatly slicked back with his proper little suit nice and fitted as he walked to your home that evening. your mother being gone as she needed to visit one of the women in charge of fabrics, leaving you and eli alone for the session.

unamused at the knock on your front door, you did not get up from your seat on the couch to answer it. there was another knock followed by silence, then another knock.

"[flop ass name] i've come for our session," he states loud enough for someone to hear inside, "i'll just let myself in."

weirdo. he opens the door revealing you seated upon the couch. bored and not wanting to pay attention to the dressed up man who closed the door behind him.

eli only looks around your house to take in everything, the decorations and the little vase of flowers sitting on a nearby table. his dumb smile plastered on his face as he looks you down, as if to belittle you and show you that he's the one in power at the moment.

"so, your mother wanted me to have a session with you. rid any demons that may have possessed you," he begins, "it'll be simple, i'll check you for any signs and have you say a prayer with me."

"i'm thrilled," you roll your eyes and eli shoots a glare.

eli crouches in front of you with a grimace on his face, "i can already feel it."

"feel what?"

"the demon, it's here."

"how? that's ridiculous,"eli begins to spew nonsense about feeling the presence of the demon, even saying the demon has a hand wrapped around your throat to control you like some sort of puppet. once he finished explaining it grew silent, the look on his face made you laugh. a giggle at first then laughter, the so called horror and fear was all just a mask and you knew it.

"i don't understand what you find so amusing [name], i'm trying to help you," eli became upset.

"no you're not, you're only trying to make yourself look better to the town," you say, "you promise all the redemption and shout prayer after prayer but turn your back whenever an untrue rumor conspires against someone."

"that's not true-"

"yes it is." you cut him off, "it's happened to so many people in the town including me."

the tips of eli's ears began to burn red, becoming angry from your attitude problem.

"those people and you are not following the ideals that god has provided in the bible." he stated.

"to hell with your ideas," your reply to your words was a sting from his hand slapping you. enough to turn your head in shock, turning back with a smile you spoke up, "do it again."

eli's face twists with disdain in contrast with the heat that begun in his chest and up into his face, looking down at you with your smile that laced with evil he sucks in air through his teeth.

"what's wrong eli?" you ask innocently, then raise a hand to caresses his face. it's soft, who would've known.

his hands became clammy when you pushed yourself off the couch and kneeled down with eli, trailing your fingers against the top of his suit.

"you seem tense," you whisper for only eli to hear, "i can fix that."

leaning in, you press a chaste kiss against eli's lips. Shockingly, they're soft. Eli's hands become shaken, clammy as he has no idea what to do or where to put them. Only squeezing his eyes shut before slipping a glance to see your pretty face so close. His mood erratically changed from anger to shock, then to yearning once you pulled away. 

Looking directly at his dumb flushed state, you laugh at him. Confused, eli opens his mouth before shutting it once more in embarrassment. A burning sensation was dusted from the tips of his ears, traveling from his face down to his chest. Only god and himself would know the heat only traveled further downward with the way you inched closer to him. 

"you look so pathetic like this, but i can't help that i like it," you press another kiss against his small lips. There's no love or affection but only hunger and lust, and also inexperience on eli's behalf. It didn't matter though, he was going to become such a nice little plaything for you. 

Seating him on the couch, his shirt was unbuttoned exposing the marks of sin. Dark reds and purples littered across his neck and chest creating its own painting of beauty. The evil would adore it yet the heavens above would find it disgraceful. How dare eli sunday allow this to happen? How dare eli sunday, the priest of the town, the one who everyone turned to confess there sins to was turning his back on them. How dare he quiver and shake as you undid the belt of trousers.

He was pent up and easily turned on, by the looks of it he seemed to at least turn his back on god once or twice. Wondering how he looked teary eyed and on his knees begging for mercy, it lightened you core. Building up a wetness within your panties that would later be addressed. 

"[Name]..." he breaths out as if telling a deep and dark rooted secret that he was afraid god would hear. 

"Yes eli?" you look up from you placement, on your knees with his cock in hand. Not yet starting anything but the simple feeling of your hand had him breathless. "Is something wrong eli?" 

"No i just," he was cut off by his own voice moaning out as you lick a long, slow stipe from the bottom to the top. Taking his head first then agonizingly inching down until your nose met with his pelvis. It was so much in such a short motion that had eli mouth agape, the feeling of cumming already near when he looked down at you with your eyelashes fluttering as you looked up at him. 

Pulling away, you take a breather before sinking back down. This time, bobbing only a few inches whilst you sucked him eagerly. Your hands trailed up against his thighs, using your fingernails to drag across the exposed flesh. Sure enough to leave painful scratches from the treatment. Soon enough, a hand traveled to his hip. Holding it down in attempt to stop his stuttering hips to suck him off better. The mess of spit had traveled down your chin, even dripping against the length of his cock.

With his hips still attempting to thrust themselves more into your mouth, you felt yourself gag around his cock. Going deep enough to make your eyes roll back and tears to drip along your cheeks. 

"fuck i-" Eli realizes the word that left from his mouth. Your hair was tangled around his fingers before he takes another hand to cover his mouth. Thighs trembling as he begins blabbering out apologies. 

"Forgive me please, forgive me for I have sinned," he kept chanting in a pathetic pitch. His moans enlaced themselves with his please before he suddenly whines as he cums in your mouth. Painting the inside of your mouth as your mouth is still around him. 

Pulling your lips off of him, his cock was still rock hard and eager but he began to speak up.

"Please let me taste you," it didn't come out as a question but rather a demanded plea. You smile at him as you sat up on the couch, laying back as Eli began to remove the fabrics of your clothes, leaving you in your underwear as his hands shakily but swiftly remove them. 

Eli dove between your legs like a starved man, sloppily and hungrily lapping your folds with his tongue. the warmth of his tongue was delightful and looking down at him you noticed his eyes were closed and hair disheveled. you grab a fistful of his hair in order for him to slow down, finding the movements that began to make you quiver. 

as his pattern developed your breath was practically gone, gasping and sucking in the air as much as you could. your juices as well as his tongue creating the most disgusting slurping noise, though eli loved it. he moaned against you, fingernails digging into your thighs deep enough to scar little crescents like moon shining into the window. the only witness of this unholy act. 

eli was so lost in your taste, not caring about anything else or whatever punishment he may receive in the future. this couldn't be a sin. no, if the act felt this good it must be from god themself. 

it was adding up when eli attempted to slip a finger inside of you, slow and deep as it stretched you. not painful now, but it filled you with relief when he added a second and began pumping to find another spot. with his tongue and finger working wonders on you, you released on his mouth and he gladly cleaned you up with his tongue. 

eli let his head fall back, waiting for any movement from you yet you didn't budge. 

he glared, "why aren't you-" a slap was met to his face. your breathing was the only thing heard in the quiet living room. the smile to his face was turned you on even more, pulling you in to kiss you as you began your movements. sloppy and deep, hitting the spots hard whilst you were still sensitive from the previous orgasms.

maybe you still hated eli sunday, maybe it was all the pent up tension, or maybe you were the succubus sent down to drag him down to hell. no, eli did not believe there was a demon possessing you. his eyes rolled back as sweat clung to his forehead, hips meeting with yours to hit so perfectly together. 

his mind was racing but also blank, not knowing what to focus his attention on. But he knew damn well his was in love with this feeling. Like he thought before this must be some godly thing that he was expierence. a spiritual awakening is what this had to be. or perhaps you were the god he prayed to each day and night, the one who he seeked forgiveness  to. yes, deinfetly. 

both you and eli were getting so close to your high, having no shame with the with the noises being woven into the quiet night or even the mixtures of reds and purples like a the most ethereal of paints. with the final thrust, eli had come undone beneath you. clinging onto you as you followed along shortly after. intertwined in the night for only whatever god above to judge.

[amaya-chwan]

Takeaways from Therapy Game: Restart Chapter 13 (and some Therapy Game news!)

Hello everyone! I hope you've all been well these past two months and taken care of yourselves! 💜

Before we get into our takeaways for chapter 13, I saw some news from Hinohara-sensei's Official Twitter that I would like to share with you all!

First piece of news: Therapy Game re:start volume 2 will be released on 1st June 2021! 🎉

Second: in conjunction with the release of the second volume, Sensei will have an in-person fan signing event at the Ikebukuro Animate store (animate honten) AND will have a special limited time shop featuring goods of our favourite dorks! This shop will be opened 6th-20th June! 🎉🎉

Image from Sensei's Official Twitter post! ❤️💛💜❤️

Now, what does the second piece of news mean for us not living in Japan (such as myself)? 🤔 Well, one of two things could happen:

We could see the merch on Sensei's Twitter and wish we could buy them one day 😭 OR

Animate could "potentially" release this merch for online order!

I'm not trying to get anyone's hopes up, but when I saw Animate open a special Yuri!!! on Ice shop last year, I didn't think they'd release merch online. But they did, for a very, very short period of time only! So my only hope is that they do that again for Hinohara-sensei! 🤞

Here's the special website from Sensei's twitter that has information about the fan signing event and limited time shop! It seems they'll show what merch will be available in the shop when it's all been finalised.

If I spot anymore updates about that, I'll try to post about it here! ❤️💛

Alright, down to business as usual! Let's get into our takeaways~ Thank you for being so patient with me! Life has been a little busy this year with juggling work and social life! So I really appreciate your patience! 💜

Here are our takeaways for this chapter:

Loving the brotherly love we see in this chapter! Warms my heart to no end! ❤️💛💜❤️

Minato, bb, you are growing up a lot! I am proud of you! 😭

Did I ever tell you guys that I really love Mito-san too? No? Well now I have ahah! He is just amazing and I love the energy he has--cool and lovable, yet smooth and sexy! Loving the domestic vibes I'm getting! 😍😍

AHHH SHIZUMA! Your smile is too pure, it's blinding! 🥰

Just couple goals from Shizuma and Minato, AND from Mito-san and Shouhei! (Why I don't call Mito-san Itsuki, I'll never know ahah I blame Shouhei! XDDD) ❤️💛💜❤️

The younger sibling moments in this chapter are so relatable! (I am that younger sibling ahahah!) 🤣🤣🤣

I honestly don't know what to think of Onodera at this point in time? 🤔

The (supposed) date time with Shizuma and Minato went from adorable anticipation to steamy relations in a split second, but not NSFW! 😲

And that’s it for this chapter’s takeaways! For a more detailed breakdown/summary of this chapter, please continue after the cut! Since it's been a while since the last chapter, I threw in some extra surprises in this summary, so keep reading if you want to see~  😉✨

Our chapter begins with an image of Mito-san and Minato, with Minato's cheek leaning on Mito-san's shoulder. The dialogue reads: When it seems like my overflowing emotions are about to burst from the seams, I really do yearn for this back (i.e. something familiar he can always lean on).

We see Minato spaced out on a sofa, being called by Itsuki. Itsuki tells Minato to go home if he's just going to sit there like that since he is very busy cleaning his entire home for when Shouhei moves in with him! Minato gets up, understands the situation, and helps Itsuki out.

Itsuki, knowing something has happened between Shizuma and Minato, asks Minato directly since he only goes to Itsuki's place when he is troubled, and he must be troubled by something related to Shizuma. He also says that Shizuma is worried about Minato, especially since Itsuki lied to him about Minato's whereabouts.

Minato brushes it off, saying that it's nothing big. He talks about the time when they had to drop by Shizuma's workplace, he saw a woman/Onodera (not knowing she's Shizuma's director) and that Shizuma made an very adorable face while talking to her.

Minato stops talking, so Itsuki asks if that is all to the story. Minato then says yes, so Itsuki deduces that Minato is ignoring Shizuma because he happily spoke with that woman (Onodera) and confirms with Minato, who then agrees. Itsuki blames himself for raising Minato like this and apologises to Shizuma in his inner monologue.

Minato defensively says he's told Shizuma not to do that, yet he still does. Minato's monologue says that this Shizuma--who is talking to someone unknown to him, about a story he doesn't know, in a place he doesn't know about--seems like a distant person to him.

He realises that even though he and Shizuma are together, he cannot monopolise him, and that it annoys him. So rather than tell him not to speak with others, he has chosen not to see Shizuma until he calms down. Suddenly, a handyman appears at Itsuki's home to beginning furniture installations.

Image translated from Sensei’s Twitter post here!

Minato is surprised Itsuki replaced a lot of his furniture, to which Itsuki replies: "I wonder if Shouhei-kun prefers the new ones too."  Minato says Shouhei would freeze from this "surprise" and imagines Shouhei asking how much it cost!

Itsuki, still in his happy bubble, says he wants Shouhei to also select some household furniture and accessories, so they'll go shopping together next time. Minato is happy for them since their house-moving plans are going well. Itsuki goes back to their previous topic of conversation, and says how Shizuma and Shouhei both are very charming. He recounts how Shouhei would handle different kinds of customers, from the difficult to the sad ones, how his charms and personable skills would change their mood completely, and calls him a genius who has a knack for calming customers.

Minato asks if Itsuki dislikes that, since he himself doesn't know what to think of Shizuma showing his charm and friendliness to others and that some misunderstandings would arise eventually.

Itsuki then reminds Minato that out of all the people in the world, Shizuma asked Minato to live with him, and that thought alone must've made him happy.

Minato does agree, yet it doesn't change the fact that he is unaware of what Shizuma does outside of the home. Itsuki is then suspicious that Minato and Shizuma are going to move in together too.

Minato panics, and says he just meant that from Itsuki's point of view since he's moving in with Shouhei. Just as Minato thinks he's almost let the secret slip, he gets a phone call. Itsuki tells Minato that it's Shizuma, but Minato refuses to pick it up as he is "still cleaning"--the real reason is that Minato told Shizuma he wouldn't forgive him if they speak before Minato gave the OK to talk again.

Itsuki, being the older brother, answers the phone and slides it on the desk near Minato and leaves him to talk with Shizuma, even putting it on loud speaker since Minato is preoccupied.

Shizuma is frantically trying to get a response from Minato, to which Minato responds with a simple: “What... I can hear you.” The first thing Shizuma asks is where Minato is at this present moment, fearing that he might be at a suspicious place. Minato says he isn't and is in fact in the neighbourhood doing some errands. Shizuma breathes a sigh of relief and is thankful his call finally reached Minato as no one he asked knew where Minato was, and because Shizuma was overthinking things, he was just about to go searching for him.

Minato tells him that he doesn't need to go to such lengths and make such a big fuss about it, but Shizuma tells him that he will always make a big fuss about it since it's about Minato. To avoid such a thing happening again, Shizuma tells Minato not to make him worry. Then these pages happen:

Just as their talk of their brothers' moving into together comes to an end, Shizuma gets all excited to go apartment hunting with Minato again and reminds him, not knowing that Itsuki is also listening. The Mito brothers freeze in surprise, with Itsuki soon confirming his earlier suspicions with Minato--his eyes and aura going all kira kira (i.e. sparkly). Minato tries to reprimand him for bringing it up now, but Shizuma continues on, saying he's found a few places he likes and they should start inspecting prospective apartments soon before they're overwhelmed by it all.

Minato hastily agrees to it all, and Shizuma smirks on the other end of the phone, asking Minato when they can see each other. Shizuma suggests Friday if he is too busy at the present moment, and just as Minato gives work as an excuse not to see him on that day, Itsuki jumps in and says he can go see Shizuma.

Shizuma, very surprised by the fact Itsuki overheard their conversation, says his name aloud, and Shouhei overhears him. Itsuki thanks Shizuma for letting him overhear such an adorable story featuring Shouhei. And then this happens:

Still very flustered, Minato quickly agrees to seeing Shizuma on Friday and promptly ends the call before Shizuma can even finish saying "Wait!" Itsuki happily approaches Minato and asks to hear more of their apartment hunting adventures, to which Minato replies that nothing is final yet!

We change locations, and Minato is now on the balcony scrubbing the floor. Minato recalls how he wanted to tell Itsuki about his and Shizuma's plans to move in together further down the track. He then is overjoyed at the thought that Shizuma missed him and wanted to see him. While he awaits Friday, he remembers and is embarrassed by how furious he was the last time they saw each other. He plans to start a skin routine to care for his face and to get his hair done.

Just as he thinks this, he is called out by none other than Shizuma, who is on the ground floor outside. Minato, visibly surprised, asks Shizuma why he’s here. Shizuma tells him that the shop is close to his home. Minato knows this, but is more curious as to why he is here since they just agreed to see each other on Friday. Shizuma is taken aback for a moment, before saying: 

While Minato hides away from Shizuma and quickly tries to style his hair, Itsuki overhears a ruckus on his balcony and goes to investigate. We then find out that Shouhei accompanied Shizuma. Shouhei calls out to Itsuki and asks why he didn't tell him that he was cleaning the whole house. The Ikushima brothers offer to help out with the cleaning, with Shizuma joining in because his younger brother will be under Itsuki's care soon. Itsuki happily agrees, saying that he wouldn't be able to fully clean the place if only Minato were there.

As the Ikushima brothers are getting ready to go upstairs to help, Itsuki says the brothers are indeed good, endearing people, and their charming personalities would probably make Minato and Itsuki anxious at times. Minato agrees. Itsuki then continues to say that while Shizuma and Shouhei charm those around them, the only ones who can make them smile the way they do are themselves. Minato is concerned about a possible intruder in their relationship, and Itsuki provides some brotherly advice.

We change scenes to Onodera, smoking on the clinic rooftop and thinking about Shizuma's smiling face.

We change scenes again to Minato, waiting for Shizuma at a predetermined location since it is now Friday. Happy with his new hairdo, Minato reminds himself not to get angry, to sort out the current situation they're in (i.e. Minato's one-sided anger at Shizuma), and to be calm and collected.

Shizuma then gets out of a car across the road, and looks around for Minato. Minato, who can see him very clearly, smiles happily and decides to let Shizuma look for him a little longer. A few more moments pass by, and Shizuma spots Minato and then waves happily to him. However, there is a slight problem.

Minato sees “the woman from last time” (Onodera) driving the car who then passes Shizuma his phone, with him smiling awkwardly at her. He recalls Itsuki's brotherly advice. Minato had actually asked Itsuki a follow-up question: "You say ‘just don't lose,’ but what should I actually do?" Itsuki tells him that it's something he has to figure out for himself.

Shizuma runs to Minato, apologising for making Minato wait. He explains that he was running late due to various issues, and he seemed to have dropped his phone in the car of the person who dropped him off. Before he could even tell Minato that it's his director who dropped him off, Minato says he doesn't need to say anything else and to just go out with him.

We see that Shizuma and Minato are now at a hotel, with Minato quickly pushing Shizuma onto the bed. Shizuma is annoyed at himself for letting Minato see such a scene that would cause a misunderstanding. Before heading over to the bed, Minato closes the door, turns to face Shizuma, and grins. He crawls onto the bed and immediately kisses Shizuma. He calls out Shizuma's name before asking him:

He softly pleads with Shizuma, asking for a quick response. Shizuma wonders if Minato's jealously is making him want to be held right now. He thinks Minato is really, really adorable, but also realises this isn't the right time to be thinking this. So Shizuma does tell Minato he loves him, that it's obvious he loves him very much. He apologises for causing him to worry and that he never once intended to do so. Minato cuts him off, saying that he understands and that it's okay.

Despite saying so, Shizuma notices the atmosphere is a little different than usual. Minato then tells Shizuma that he's been thinking of a way to ensure he doesn't lose Shizuma to anyone or lets anyone take him. The final page shows us this:

Again, THANK YOU FOR READING THIS FAR! 💜 📢  As always, please support Hinohara-sensei by purchasing her books and CDs! 📢

And that’s it for this chapter! 😲 Another cliffhanger here, and ngl that was a little (SFW-ish) steamy? I honestly do not know what to expect in the next chapter!! Dominant Minato?????  But I hope you enjoyed the few extra panels in this summary! 💜 My laptop struggled to keep up, so I will go back to only showing a handful of panels in future summaries. Please also refrain from resharing these translations and images outside of this post! Thank you for understanding! ❤️💛

The next chapter will be in next month's Dear+, so the wait isn't too much longer! So I shall see you all next month for our next set of takeaways to find out what happens next!

As always, stay safe during these turbulent times and look out for each other and for your loved ones! 💜❤️💛

[rogue-durin-16]

FIREWORKS AND STREAMERS

Request: I have been insecure about my curly hair lately and was wondering if you can you write something with one of the weasley twins where the reader is insecure about her curly hair and one of the twins makes her feel better.

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Hufflepuff!Reader

Genre: fluff

Tags:

Requested by: @wildcat1434

Fred Weasley: @whiskeyn-rain @lumos-solemn

Permanent taglist: @elia-the-bibliophile @randomparanoid @karlthecat15722 @thebutchersdaughtersblog

Warnings: none

A/N: So like, incoming fluff bc this idea was cute and sometimes I do be needing fluff, that's about it, enjoy <3

Rogue-durin-16 masterlist

The relationship between me and my hair had always been... Bumpy, you could say.

There were periods in which I would find it quite lovely; during those times I would let my curls free, showing them off with a proud demeanor, knowing my hair was unique. Those times began to turn less and less usual since the middle of third year, though they were still there.

However, after the summer prior to my sixth year, those moments had banished; I only wished to hide my hair, and my friends ended up noticing. They told me surely there would be a spell or potion able to change my hair.

As if they had summoned it, the next day in Transfiguration, Professor McGonagall introduced us to what seemed like my salvation; Crinus Muto, an advanced spell that modified the caster's hair with no restrictions.

My best friend advised me against using it, claiming it wouldn't help my insecurity— if only, it would worsen it.

I really wanted to do as she had told me and completely dismiss the spell's existence, but two nights after I had a big mental breakdown about it, caused by the most stupid thing ever.

"Is Weasley staring at you or am I blind?" One of my friends whispered, her eyes trained on the Gryffindor table.

I didn't even bother to look up, not wanting to know whether it was true or not, before responding with a quiet "You're blind."

"I mean, it's hard to tell with two rows of students between us but," She nudged me, urging me to avert my gaze from my dinner and redirect it to Fred. "it kinda looks like he's... staring."

Curiosity killed the cat, I guess. My eyes finally left my plate and were, in fact, met with Fred's brown ones. As soon as they met, though, he looked away, pretending to be focused on his food, just like I had been doing seconds ago.

"Of course he's staring." Hannah Abbot, who sat right in front of my friend, commented with her mouth full. "Have you seen your hair?" She swallowed her food, looking me up and down before adding, "No offense, but it's an absolute mess." My eyes opened widely in shock at her bluntness. "You should take care of it, really."

"Has someone ever told you you're an ill-mannered bitch, Hannah?" I heard my friend talking back at the younger girl while I got up and started to make my way out of the Great Hall.

Of course, I didn't see Fred shooting up and attempting to go after me; ultimately he decided to stay in his place, since he saw my friend walking out too.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was very aware of all the pair of eyes that had been laid on me the very moment I entered the greenhouse where we would be doing the Herbology tasks.

When I had met my friends at the Hufflepuff common room that morning, I had received divided opinions about my straight hair. At first I had been very convinced that it looked way better than my curly hair, but seeing my friends' reaction, I wasn't that confident about it anymore.

I didn't have time to undo the spell before class, so I decided to go along with it and see how the day unfolded.

I took a deep breath, my eyes trained on the ground as I made my way to an empty seat; maybe there weren't that many people staring, maybe it was just my anxiety.

I finally gathered the courage and looked up, nervously scanning the glasshouse so I could shake off my fears.

There was only a couple of my peers staring, which would have put me at ease, if one of them wasn't Fred Weasley.

On top of it, of course, he wasn't even trying to be subtle, it was almost as if he wanted me to notice his judging eyes; I could feel his gaze on me for the entire class.

The instant Professor Sprout dismissed us, I shoved everything in my bag and left the greenhouse, thanking a couple of Gryffindors who complimented my hair on my way out.

Again, I didn't notice Fred leaving the class as soon as he could to run after me.

I threw my bag against a tree near the lake shore and, as I fell against it, I heard someone jogging in my direction.

"In a hurry to sit by the lake, Y/l/n?" I followed the tall ginger with my eyes while he circled me and sat down by me. "You alright?"

"I just needed a break from... People." I vaguely explained, focusing on the water instead of on the boy besides me.

"Understandable." He hesitated for a second before adding, "Do you want me to leave?"

"No, it's fine." I surprised myself at how calmed and collected I sounded, as if I wasn't chatting with my crush.

"What happened to your hair?" His genuinely curious inquiry took me aback, and I struggled to find something to answer.

"Why?" My heartbeat picked up, anxiety inundating me once more. "You don't like it?"

"It looks weird." Fred looked at me up and down with a grimace. "You don't... Look like yourself." I was about to enter fight or flight mode, but he seemed to notice, and panic made its way to his face. "But it doesn't matter what I think," he was quick to add, his eyes wide open as if he knew he had said something he should have not. "I mean— I think it shouldn't matter, if you like it, that's great— I mean, you don't need my opinion about that either!"

"Calm down, I understand." I tried to reassure him, before his rambling drove the both of us crazy. "Can I tell you a secret?" He nodded with pursed lips, surely afraid he would fuck up if he spoke again. "I've been very insecure about my hair lately— like, very." I sighed. "My best friend told me not to straighten it, but last night I got a not so nice comment and—"

"So that's why you left?" I nodded, tugging my sleeves. Fred went silent for a moment, and then cleared his throat and scooted closer to me. "I know this won't do much, but I really love your hair. Kinda reminds me of fireworks and streamers." He gestured around his own head, mimicking the fireworks' movement. "Dunno I think is fun and pretty awesome." I raised my brows at him in surprise. "Like you."

"Aw, that's very sweet." He offered me a sheepish smile as I felt my cheeks blushing. "It does a lot, actually." I confessed, fidgeting with my rings. "I guess I kinda needed to hear something positive about my hair."

"Well, whenever you need to hear something positive about your hair," he pointed at himself. "I'm your man." He winked at me and I let out a chuckle. "I can also tell you positive things about you in general, but that has a price."

"And what is it?"

"You'll have to let me buy you a drink at The Three Broomsticks this Saturday." I tried not to let panic slip through my recently eased demeanor; was he asking me on a date? "And give me a kiss after." He wiggled his brows at me and my face turned red. "the kiss is negotiable."

I casted my gaze down, fixing it on my shoes, not sure of what I was supposed to say at that. His foot tapping mine snapped me out of my thoughts.

"So?" My eyes traveled to him once more, only to find his studying me already. "What do you say, Y/l/n?"

"Well," I shrugged, trying in vain to play nonchalant. "Seems like an affordable price, so it's fine by me."

"I'll pick you up after lunch, yeah?" Before I could agree, he gasped, his eyes going wide. "I'm a genius."

"Come again?" I frowned, confused as his sudden frantic behavior.

"Don't mind me, love." He jumped up and jogged towards the castle, leaving me puzzled in there. I was about to grab a book from my bag when Fred rushed back, crouched down and pecked my cheek. "Your hair's amazing." He assured me. "See you!" My fingertips graced my now flushed cheek as he headed off.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was finishing my lunch when two towering redheads entered the Hall running; while George, slowed down, Fred made a beeline to the Hufflepuff table, his casual clothes already on.

"Ready?" He asked breathless.

"Yeah— you didn't have lunch, did you?" I pointed out, getting up to stand in front of him.

"No, but I'll eat something later—" his eyes roamed over my carefully picked outfit before stating, "You look... very pretty."

"Why, thank you." I offered him a smile and looked over my shoulder at the Gryffindor table, where his friends were very attentive to all we did. "You sure you don't wanna eat something?"

"Hundred percent." He tilted his head towards the gates. "shall we?" He prompted to walk before him, and it was then that I realized he had his hands behind his back. Once we were out in the yard, he tugged my hand and made me turn to him. "I made something for you."

"You didn't have to." Was the first thing that came to my mind when I heard his words. Then the wording dawned on me; he didn't get me something, he made me something. "What is it?"

"So, you know that I told you your hair reminded me of fireworks and streamers?" I nodded, not quite knowing where he was going with that. "Well—" he then showed me what his back was hiding; a delicate, tiny firecracker with my name written on the side. "George helped me so I could finish it on time."

"I'm—" at my loss of words, I could only let out a happy laugh. "This is so cute— am I supposed to ignite it?"

"Duh!" I gently pushed his shoulder in response to his teasing. "Do you know how to do it?"

"I've seen you do it plenty of times." I admitted, grabbing the firecracker with one hand and my wand with the other; it looked so pretty, it was a pity I'd have to ruin it.

With a brief firemaking spell, the firecracker set off. Fred pulled me back slightly before it happened, though.

I was in awe at the beautiful fireworks before us, which looked like a color-changing, expanding version of my hair.

When the colors died out, I turned to Fred, whose attention was already on me, awaiting for a reaction. Surely, he was not expecting the kiss he got, but he didn't complain either; while my hands rested on his chest, his traveled to cup my cheeks before I could pull away.

"So you liked it?" He questioned quietly against my lips.

"I loved it." I whispered back with a wide smile. "You're a sweetheart." I pecked his lips before retreating. Holding his hand in mines, I made my way back into the castle. "We're not leaving until you have lunch."

"You are a sweetheart." He responded, following my lead without offering resistance. "By the way, your hair looks gorgeous." The corners of my lips twisted into a bigger smile at the sweet words he spoke only for me to hear as we went back into the Great Hall.

Maybe my hair wasn't that bad after all.