#those who take the time to let into their perspective

[itsjustlikefallingsnow]

i'm sure this all has been said before but i am utterly besotted with how essek's arc in c2 looks from the m9s perspective.

like, you meet a guy with full authority on whether you friend's husband lives or dies. he's mysterious and powerful and will not take any of your bullshit. he's incredibly hot. you invite him over for dinner and he says no i have work and then knocks at your door fourty minutes later and says i changed my mind would you um uh. have me over for dinner. he infodumps to you about driving his father to his own death and also not having any friends. this makes a lot of sense. he wont let you forget about all those favours you owe him but does teach your wizard some baller spells. you fuck off for a couple months. come back in time to attend a fancy party in honour of the peace agreement you busted your entire ass to make happen. out of curiosity you decide to spy on the convo between ludinus and some slightly suspicious dignitary. its like, super easy to do that unnoticed. the dignitary is that fucking guy. holyshit.jpeg . he's still doing his most recognizable gimmick under his disguise. youre like what the fuck man and he starts crying. you fuck off for another couple months. get back. he's incredibly hyped to hear from you and eager af to help. not a mention of the favours you owe is made. halfway through the conversation he stops to rant about how hes a terrible person and will do anything to atone. his devastating puppy eyes are on par with your wizard who he's obviously pathetically in love with. you bring him with you into the worstest couple days of his elven life. he's visibly trembling but like still trying to be cool in front of your wizard. when its over he gives a speech about friendship and love and repenting. he's crying the entire time.

he floats away to go repent. you check in a year later and he's leading a fulfilling life with your wizard. he has not found a way to soft launch his walking normally again . he's one of your bestest friends.

[blackynsupremacy]

RETURNING THE FAVOR

pairing: nicholas chavez x black!fem!reader

summary: you and your fiancé, nicholas, start to look at things in a new perspective after spending the whole day with your three-year-old nephew, ashton.

contains: lots of words, so. much. fluff., cuddling, kissing, playfulness, mention of death in the family, nicholas being the big sweetheart he is. you call your nephew by the nickname “bookie” pronounced like “pookie”, but with a b.

a/n: the club blurb with nicholas is in the drafts, it’s coming, but i was in a light fluffy mood! i need that man expeditiously.

taglist: @rosiestalez @elitesanjisimp @jkr820 @simply-the-best23 @ellethespaceunicorn @sabrinasopposite @gxuxhdjdu @zombigrlll @paisholotus @tryingtograspctrl @afrogirl3005 @afrowrites

your older sister couldn’t thank you and nicholas enough as she handed off a backpack with all of the items necessary for caring for your nephew, ashton. she was making plans to do his hair and spend quality time with her son, but she got called in for an eight hour shift, so she didn’t hesitate to call you up to see if you and nicholas were available to babysit. you and nicholas enthusiastically agreed to take on the task of spending this time with ashton. fortunately, he was on a month long break before filming for his next project and this was your weekend off. a smile grew on both of your faces as you felt two tiny arms wrap around your legs. your beaming face looks down to meet ashton’s, who gazed up at you with those precious doe eyes and wide grin with his kinky afro of curls sticking up and around in different directions on his head.

“hi, ti-ti!” his soft high pitched voice made you and your sister simper as you bent down to gather your nephew within your arms.

“hey, bookie!” you greet him and turn him to nicholas who was already grinning as he greeted the boy before he reached his hands out to see if ashton wanted to give him a hug.

“hey, buddy! how’s my guy, huh?”

“uncle nic!” ashton jovially responded, quickly unraveling his miniature arms from around your neck to make grabby hands towards nicholas who didn’t hesitate to scoop him from your arms.

“here let me get this for you. we’ll leave you ladies alone. we’re gonna have a little snack until we get started. it’s always a pleasure to see you, s/n. we’ll be ready when you are, babe.”

nicholas said before placing a kiss on your cheek. he held the toddler on his side with one arm and like the gentleman he was, he took the backpack off your sister’s hands to which she graciously thanked him. he took his cue to exit to the kitchen while striking up a conversation with ashton about the snack options available and what he wanted. you and your sister smiled in their direction and turned to each other to resume your own conversation.

“girl, i can’t thank you enough for this. i hate that it had to be so last minute, but you know that i got—”

you interrupted your sister, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder with a small smile on your face.

“it’s okay, sis. you know that nic and i got you, through and through. life happened and we’re gonna help you as you keep going for your life and your family, so it’s no issue.”

she nods silently to receive your kind words and you both got a bit watery eyed and sniffled before composing yourselves.

“you’re right. i’m just trying to do what’s best for ashton, y/n. i swear when life hits me right one day, i’m gonna be able to return the favor for you and nicholas .” she gives you a cheeky grin and shoots a wink towards your way as the warm heat of embarrassment rise on your brown cheeks. you stood there stunned as she chuckled and shifted the purse on her shoulder.

“it’s okay, n/n. that’s a call that both you and nicholas have to make first, but know i got you like you got me when i had the munchkin.” you give each other one last hug, not without her giving you a few more key reminders regarding ashton’s care and the time she’ll be back before she heads to the driveway and exits in her vehicle.

you remembered three years ago when he was just born. you and nicholas had just started dating and he couldn’t help, but look at you with pride and joy at your excitement for your sister’s firstborn. ever since you two were little girls, you’d both dream of finding your respective prince charmings and happily growing a family of your own. boy, do dreams come true. ashton’s a little boy with the biggest personality. he’s silly, curious, intelligent, rambunctious, loved playing basketball, talking about his favorite superheroes, and not to mention the cutest little boy you’ve ever seen! he was a perfect mix of his parents, which was bittersweet considering the fact that his father had passed away from a car accident a year ago. it was an event that was truly life altering for your sister as she had to navigate life as a widow and a single parent. she had to pick up longer hours to keep the house, get counseling for her and ashton, and most of your family showed up before and during the funeral, but after a month, the phone calls and texts stopped coming. not you and nicholas, though. your older sister being the rock she is has supported you in happiness and heartbreak throughout childhood and adolescence, so it’s only right that you return that same love and kindness towards her and ashton, who you’ve sometimes seen as your own child.

you close the door and follow the same direction the boys walked to the kitchen. you stumble in to see a sight that almost puts your ovaries in danger of jumping your fiancé’s bones. his tall figure is standing in front of the counter, chatting it up and happily chopping up a food you can’t clearly see while ashton is clinging on to his leg like how a koala clings to a eucalyptus tree while gazing up at your giant of a fiancé with an attentive and expectant expression on his little face. you stare like a lovesick dope, watching nicholas laugh at something ashton said, putting away the knife he was using in a safe area away from the child and scooping the now diced assortment of fruit into two bowls. a smirk plays on your full lips as you cross your arms and lean up against the doorway of the kitchen before you speak.

“what are my favorite boys up to? it sounds like you’ve started the party without me.” you giggle when they simultaneously turn their heads in the direction of your voice. ashton taps nicholas’ leg and hold out his hands.

“uncle nic, can i bring ti-ti her snack?” he asks in the most polite manner.

nicholas nods, taking one bowl of fruit in his large hands and slowly squats to ashton’s level.

“of course, buddy! just remember to hold it with two hands and walk to ti-ti, okay?”

“mm-hmm!” his curls bounce as he nods before he does exactly what he’s told.you both beam as his little feet gingerly waddle from nicholas to you, two hands holding the bowl of fruit salad before he stops in front of you and beholds the snack for you to take.

“here you go, ti-ti. i picked the fruit you like and uncle nic cut it!” ashton cheerfully spoke, flashing his newly grown baby teeth.

your heart pounded in your chest before you squatted down to take the bowl. you ran your hand through his soft hair and kissed your nephew on his cheek.

“aw, thank you so much, bookie!” you playfully roll eyes hearing nicholas clear his throat in the background, signaling that he wants to hear praise from you as well.

“and you too, my love.” your brown eyes meet his briefly before your focus shifts back to your nephew.

“you did such a great job by listening and being careful. we’re so proud of you!”

you nod in approval and take a few bites of fruit. ashton bashfully giggles when he hears his uncle nicholas chime in with a whooping applause and jogs up to you both with another fruit bowl in his hand.

“alright, ash! you nailed it. bring it in, dude.” nicholas hypes up the smiling boy and brings his large fist down to ashton for his tiny one to bump against before he gives ashton the bowl for him to take. he’s already picking up an apple slice and biting into the fruit with glee.

“what do we say to uncle nic, bookie?” you question, peering at the eating toddler.

he swallows the food before answering,

“thank you!”

nicholas receives it with a small smile and gently runs his hand through ashton’s hair.

“you’re welcome, ash. whatever you need, you know that ti-ti and i will get it for you.”

you stand up from your crouching position.

“ashton, i gotta do your hair really quick, okay? remember when you had your hair in those braids and little ponytail? that’s what your mommy wants me to do, so you ready?”

ashton nods and pops a blueberry in his mouth.

“mm-hm. just don’t do it tight, ti-ti, it hurt.” his tone shifts to a tone of disdain and you can’t blame him. you remember back in the day when your sister used to braid your hair and you always complained that she did it too tight and she always would retort that you were “tender headed”. you didn’t want to keep up that argument any longer, so you just asked her to teach you the basics of styling your own hair. after some weekly braiding tutorials on a bratz doll head, you were straight.

“i swear, bookie. i’m not gonna braid it too tight. you’re gonna relax, watch tv, and eat while i do your hair. i pinky promise.” you held up your pinky finger and brought it to ashton’s small figure. you knew you gained his trust when he nodded and wrapped his pinky around yours, establishing your agreement. you peer up to nicholas who stood there watching the whole thing with a simpering smile.

“babe, you and ash get settled on the couch while i go and get the hair stuff, okay?” you request as you start making your way upstairs to your bathroom.

“you got it, beautiful!” he called out and didn’t let you leave before placing a quick peck to your lips to which ashton playfully gagged, causing nicholas to laugh and scoop up the boy in his arms.

“aw, don’t be like that, man! i gotta show ti-ti some love, too. come on, bud, tell me what want to watch and uncle nic will put it on for you. you like netflix? disney+?” the boys seat themselves comfortably on the sofa as they explore the many options on the tv with nicholas pressing the remote to find a show for his (already but future) nephew.

while you were gathering the products needed for ashton’s hair, the boys focus on the children’s television show that ashton selected for a few minutes. he even offers nicholas some pieces of his fruit bowl which he gratefully accepts. nicholas wasn’t hungry by any means, but who was he to deny a three year old with such good manners and an adorable, little face?

“uncle nic?” ashton’s voice broke the silence.

“what’s up, ashton?” nicholas’ brown eyes pulled from the tv to the toddler beside him.

“why do you always kiss ti-ti like that? is that nasty?” the boy tilts his head up to meet nicholas’ eyes and his brows furrow with curiosity. nicholas couldn’t help, but to chuckle before giving him an honest answer.

“i kiss her to show that i love her and i promise it’s not nasty, it’s pretty sweet actually. like candy.” nicholas was speaking straight from the heart as a small smile curved on his features, his cheeks tinted with the color of a rose as his mind went back to you. he noticed how ashton’s face turned from confusion to amazement.

“i like candy! so if i give ti-ti a kiss to show that i love her, i taste candy?”

nicholas admired the innocence of this boy. he knew that ashton had to be protected at all costs. he nods before responding,

“yeah, that’s exactly right, buddy! how about you give it a try when she comes back? you done with that?” nicholas points to the now empty bowl in ashton’s little hands. ashton looks down at the bowl and nods his head, giving nicholas his cue to take the bowl to the kitchen, wash it out, place it in the cabinet, and return to the living room. he walks in to see you return with a clear plastic box with what seemed to be a detangling comb, gel, hair ties, and an assortment of more hair products that you placed on the cushion. as nicholas returns to his seat, you take a fluffy pillow from the couch and place it down on the floor for ashton to sit on.

“ti-ti’s back, bookie! sit on the pillow, so i can do your hair.” you say, pointing at the pillow on the floor.

“wait i gotta do something first, ti-ti!” your nephew protests and moves closer to you.

“what is it, honey?” what you didn’t expect was for ashton to hug you tightly around your neck which you immediately hugged him back before he places a big whopping kiss on your cheek. he pulls back and smacks his lips as if he was trying to taste something.

“why are you doing your lips like that, ashton? is there something on my face?” you ask touching your face confused as all get out and then you hear nicholas snickering behind you. what has he put this boy up to?

“i’m trying to taste candy because uncle nic said that giving you kisses taste like candy! right, uncle nic?”

him and nicholas burst in laughter as you take the pillow from the floor and playfully whack your fiancé with it before laughing yourself, shaking your head as heat rushed to your cheeks in embarrassment.

“you both are a mess! nicholas alexander chavez, i’ma get you later, but as for you, bookie—” you lunge to scoop the boy in your arms and your fingers move rapidly on his sides. the melodies of your nephew’s hysterical laughter fill the room for a few seconds and you cease your tickling. you all take a moment to catch your breath and you put the pillow back on the floor again before instructing ashton to sit down which he happily obliges to. you roll up your sleeves, grab the detangling cream and comb, and you start the process of getting out all of the knots at the ends. nicholas watches you attentively as you glide the coconut scented cream through your nephew’s scalp. you ask him to pass you the braiding gel out of the box as you section ashton’s hair for the desired style. nicholas hands you what you need and his eyes focus on how your fingers move like clockwork within ashton’s dark, coily tresses.

whenever ashton whined a bit in pain, you and nicholas reassured him that you were being as quick and gentle as possible. within the next thirty minutes, you were done! the braids looked so fresh and neat. you took out your phone and captured a picture of ashton’s side profile and sent it your sister. you gave ashton a hand held mirror for him to gaze upon his new look and the expression on his face made your heart swell.

“what do you think, bookie? you like it?” you ask, grinning and watching him walk around with his face still in the mirror before he stops to look at nicholas with expectant doe eyes.

“i like it! do you like it, uncle nic?”

with a prideful grin, your fiancé stood grand and tall, scooping ashton up in his arms and placing him on his hip.

“ash, i say this with all honesty. you look better than me.”

“really!?” ashton playfully gasped as he wrapped his arms around his uncle’s neck.

“really, really! you look so handsome, buddy. babe, would you take our picture, please?” he pulls out his phone from his pocket and hands it over to you. you don’t hesitate to nod and open the camera, waiting for your boys to get into a pose with cheesy smiles on their faces. you count to three and snap the picture before repeating the process several times and giving nicholas his phone back.

“don’t forget to send those to me, so s/n can get them.” you say, cleaning up the tiny mess you made and put the items back to where they belong before you come back to them. you all decide it would be great to get some fresh air at the park which was a two minute walk away from your place. after changing into some active wear and grabbing ashton’s backpack, you all exit your house and take the brief stroll to your destination. once you’ve entered to the playground area, nicholas volunteers to keep an eye on ashton while he plays and you watch from a distance while sitting on the bench. the park had some people there, but it wasn’t too much of a crowd. you take pictures and videos as you watch your fiancé and nephew bond. your heart skipped a beat when you see ashton go down a slide with nicholas ready to pick him up in his arms as soon as he came to the end or when nicholas guided ashton’s small hanging body across the monkey bars as his palms gripped each bar.

he’s so good with him. i wonder what would it be like if—

as if your mind was being read, you didn’t notice the older woman that sat beside you on the bench because you were hypnotized by the display of cuteness in front of you.

“is that your husband and son? if so, they are just adorable! i miss those days so much. you’re one lucky young lady.”

you were a bit bashful due to your daydreaming, but you got yourself together promptly and indulged in the conversation.

“aw, thank you! that’s actually my fiancé with my nephew, but with the way they are around each other, i don’t blame you for thinking that at all. it’s funny because i just thinking about, you know, starting a family. i’ve been with that man for five years and i never thought i’d love him even more when i see him bond with my family, especially the little ones.”

“that’s because that’s his family too, dear. he’s going to fit right in as soon as you both tie the knot.” you turn your face to hers, there was an aura of benevolence and wisdom that reminded you of your late grandmother and oh, how you missed her so. you nod in agreement before resuming the conversation,

“you’re so right. when you put it like that, my nephew has called him ‘uncle nic’ for a whole year before we got engaged. i guess that just solidified everything!” you both create small talk for a few more minutes before the kind woman bids you a goodbye to venture on the walking trail. it wasn’t long before ashton and nicholas approach you to announce they want to shoot some hoops at the park’s basketball court. you agree before giving ashton and nicholas a water bottle and you all take the short journey to an empty basketball court. the park provided the balls for the community, so nicholas took one for him and ashton to have a little one v. one on the court. you lean up against the wired fence, observing your nephew dribbling the basketball up and down while his little legs speed past your fiancé. nicholas picks him up to let him face the goal. with the aid of nicholas’ six foot stature, ashton was able to shoot and get the ball through the net.

“he shoots, he scores! it’s nothing but net and the crowd goes wild for the mvp, ashton.” nicholas places your triumphant nephew on his shoulders and gazes at your figure, you took that as your cue to cheer, chant, and clap for ashton as if you were in a packed stadium.

“GO, BOOKIE, GO! GO, BOOKIE, GO!” you run up to them both, placing a chaste kiss on nicholas’ lips and taking ashton in your arms to give him a shower of kisses on his sweaty face.

“did you see me, ti-ti, did you see me?!” he excitedly questioned.

“yeah, i did! you did great. if you keep practicing, your mommy might put you in a real basketball team one day when you’re bigger.”

speaking of showers, you tell the boys it’s time to wrap it up here at the park. you suggest that after a wash up, you’d get some food, and enjoy some disney movies until it was time for ashton to be picked up as his mother was going to come back in a few short hours. once, you gather your belongings, you walk carrying the backpack and nicholas, carrying an exhausted and hungry ashton on his back. once you make it back to your home, you and nicholas complete your tasks to finish the day out. you take ashton to your bathroom to give him a bath to save your sister that time while nicholas goes out to grab the food. after his bath, you change ashton in a fresh set of clothes before you take him to the living room to pick out a movie to watch. you sit in comfortable silence, clicking the remote and you hear a little voice call out from beside you.

“ti-ti?”

“yes, bookie?” you quickly select a movie from the despicable me series and turn to your inquisitive nephew.

“where’s uncle nic?”

“he went to get us something to eat, love.”

“is he coming back? i really like him and i feel a little sad when he’s not here. just like how i feel sad when i don’t see you.” you knew he was asking that because of the obvious absence of his father. it made you so happy that nicholas was an exemplary man ashton looked up to, but what broke your heart is that ashton realized when someone he loves is gone, he has an uncertainty of their return. no child younger than five should feel like that. let alone any child at all. you wrap an arm around his tiny body and place a kiss atop of his head.

“how much you wanna bet uncle nic is getting your favorite?”

the glint of gloom in ashton’s eyes switched moods and his head perked up.

“he got mcdonald’s!?”

you both turn your heads at the sound of the lock clicking and the door creaking open.

“mcdonald’s delivery!”

as if timing weren’t perfect enough, nicholas walked through the front door with a large mcdonald’s bag and a cup holder tray with three drinks. you leave the couch only to help him with the load by bringing the food and drinks onto the coffee table. ashton eyes gawked as he watched nicholas take out an assortment of burgers, fries, and nuggets before you all sit and indulge in the fast food. you hit play on the movie and watch the film as you eat. within an hour, you and ashton were cuddled up against nicholas’ shield of a chest, you both lovingly watched as your nephew dozed off to sleep, his soft snores accompanied with the audio of the movie that was still playing. it was interrupted by the sound of a car horn out front. you yawned and knew it was your sister.

“you want me to carry everything to the car while you talk to s/n, baby?” nicholas whispered, his soft yet intense brown gaze held your sleepy one.

he grinned at your response of a nod before you both gingerly move, careful not to wake up ashton as you both walked him to his mother’s awaiting car. he can get pretty cranky when his sleep is disturbed. nicholas opens the back door of the car and carefully places ashton in his booster seat. it didn’t take him long to figure out how to strap him in and he softly shuts the door. he circled around to the drivers side to wrap an arm around your waist as you talk to your sister.

“so how was he? it looked like ya’ll did a lot today, huh?” your sister inquired and glances to her knocked out son in the back seat and shifts her focus back to you guys.

“he was great! no trouble at all. i braided down his hair and after that we took him out to the park where he kicked nicholas’ tail in some hoops. he’s already had a bath and something to eat, so you don’t have to worry about that, sis.” you all chuckle, your lips graciously smile and you wrap your own arm around nicholas’ sculpted torso. he peers down at you with affection in his eyes at your touch. you don’t notice it, but your sister does, and she couldn’t be happier for you both.

“aww, well i appreciate you both so much for watching him! y/n, remember that talk we had about me returning the favor because you know i got you.”

she points and shoots you a wink. nicholas chuckles watching you cover your face with embarrassment. after the laughter and chatting dies down, your sister bids you and nicholas a goodbye before pulling off. with your hands joined together, you and nicholas walk back into your home. you both take time to tidy up the living room before retiring to your own bedroom. nicholas lays in the bed in nothing, but a chain and grey sweatpants with his hands behind his head. his brown eyes burn into your figure as you slip out of your previous clothes and change into a pair of his boxers and one of his oversized t-shirts. you’ve been with him for five years and you still feel bashful under his intense gaze. you dig in your drawer to find your black satin bonnet and you easily slip it on your head as you saunter to the bed and lay your body up against his, your arms wrapped around his neck and your head on his shoulders. his large arms find themselves to embrace you, one of his hands hold on to your thigh to bring your leg up across his waist.

you both lay there in comfortable silence to catch your breaths from such an exhilarating day. you break the silence with a whisper,

“you’re really good with ashton, you know. i just wanted you to know that.”

“i appreciate it, doll and he loves you so much. i love you so much.”

he softly declares, placing a peck to your forehead, cheek, and earlobe. he stops to peer into your eyes then your lips and into your eyes again, silently asking permission to go further. you smile with a nod before you reach up to guide your lips to his, he holds your waist to pull you right on top of him as you both continue to give each other’s lips the longing, passionate kisses you’ve both been waiting for all day. a hum vibrates in your chest when his teeth gently pull at your pouty bottom lip out for him to release it and bounce back to it’s original place. after a minute or two of indulging in each other, you both pull away to lay in your original position now with swollen lips and shallow breaths.

“i love you too by the way.” you place a peck on his bare chest where his heart is.

“babe, i got a question. why did you and s/n talk about returning a favor or something?”

the heat of embarrassment rose on your earth toned face, he was no dummy, so it was only fair he was going to catch on.

“what she meant was that one day she would like to do the babysitting—you know, for us, when we–” you paused. the volume of your voice diminished with each word.

“have kids?” nicholas finished the sentence. still avoiding his eyes, you give a small smile and nod confirming his answer.

“yeah.”

“hey, hey. look at me.” his pointer finger finds itself under your chin to lift your eyes to meet his sincere gaze.

“if you’re thinking in that beautiful brain of yours that one day i want to start a family with you, then you’re absolutely right. spending that time with you and ashton had me thinking that if we’re this good at being ti-ti and uncle nic, what would it be like if we were mom and dad?”

you couldn’t help, but to laugh with excitement while putting your hands in your face. he pulled you in so close and showered your face with kisses.

“nope! don’t hide that beautiful face away from me. the same face that i’ll see at that altar and the same face i’ll see on our future children!”

“okay, okay! i give!” you let out giggle and give him a chaste kiss before pulling from his grip.

“so you want a baby with me?” you ask just one more time to make sure you weren’t dreaming. he lays another kiss on you. this kiss was sincere, a confirmation. he pulled back and gazed into your eyes.

“i wouldn’t want anything more with anyone else. does that answer your question?”

you nod and pull the duvet over you both.

“so, should we start trying?” nicholas seductively inquires in your ear after he scoots up behind you, caressing the melanated skin of your thigh.

“nah.” you answered with a dry tone before shutting off the light and pulling the cover over your body. nicholas was gagged. you guess he forgot what you said earlier when he played that little “candy kisses” trick on your nephew.

“come on, baby. whatever i did please let me make it up to you by making you a mommy, hm?” he playfully whined with a pout.

“uh-uh. i told you i was gonna get you! you can make it up to me when you’re off punishment.”

“now, how long would that be?”

“goodnight, nicholas.” you ruffle his hair and chuckled at him sucking his teeth as you nuzzled deeper within the covers.

“y/n!”

[velvetvexations]

I got this comment on my antigonism explainer and I asked for permission to address in it's own post because I think it's good feedback:

I appreciate your support of transmasc and transnull people more than you can ever know. I, however, think coming up with a phrase that distincts “transmasc friendly transfems” is deeply divisive- and will further the divide and discourse between transfems and transmascs We don’t need a speciality phrase to denote people who are friendly towards us since those that are AGAINST us are the loud minority- the majority of real world trans people (transfems especially) are in unity with transmascs I think that this may just worsen the divides that are already starting to exist, and will further perpetuate discourse where it isn’t needed. Transfems can just say they support transmascs and transNB people, you guys don’t have to come up with a special title. I mean this all with the upmost love and sincerity. Transfems who support transmascs are the majority of transfems, yes there is an issue with TIRFism online But that is not the majority of transfems on the internet- and especially in real life. We should be focusing on greater unity and talking about what makes us similar- not dividing ourselves even more into subcategories to be policed or pointed to. From a transnull who is just as deep in this discourse

I'm thankful for your perspective and that you've given thought to the issue, and wanted to share your thoughts in a way that I feel is really sweet, which as someone with NPD I appreciate a lot. This is something that's been expressed to me about the idea previously.

I disagree, though. Are transfems who support transmascs and other non-transfems the majority? Yes, absolutely! But when the vocal minority is as loud as it is, they need to be loudly shutdown. That kinna thing takes megaphones. They're going to go away on their own and I want there to be a way to take an active stance that throws oneself out there as someone opposed to that shit.

Already it's just taken as a given that transfems are all TRFs.* If we don't go further, we're letting the vocal nature of the minority take up more and more space and become more and more accepted. Because like, they are super aggressive about it. These things get spread around on posts with thousands of notes every day. TRFs do nothing but bitch about non-transfem trans, intersex, and GNC people, and in doing so make spaces an increasingly less safe place for them.

And the signaling is a really important issue too. A lot of the responses to antigonism from transmascs in particular have been saying that it makes them feel safer. I've gotten messages from people who feel really bad about the paranoia trans radical feminism has caused them to feel around transfems they don't know, and that sucks! I'm so not interested in dismissing that as people who need to be less online or something, especially since I've heard a lot of stories of IRL spaces being hostile to any expression of masculinity as well. These are people who are, at best, facing a massive bullying issue, and at worst being driven out of the trans community entirely. It's cruel and I'm not going to shame them for having this expectation hammered into them, especially because I've also constantly been let down over and over and over when I see a post about transmisogyny or the transfem experience that I really like, only to be gravely disappointed when I see they're a TRF. It constantly happens. It sucks. It sucks so unbelievably much.

Hell, a lot of TRFs are self-identified TMEs, and in fact, most of them are! Every time they do one of their polls trying to prove some dumbass point, it's overwhelmingly "TMEs" who respond. It's like, a relatively small number of transfems kicking around a little cult of sycophants, many of whom are weird as fuck in their own ways but also many who are just trying to be good allies. They should also be signaled to that, hey, when I tell them they actually didn't need to drop a headcanon of a character that gave them joy because a transfem said so, I'm not the freak anomaly I get painted as. Like, I've responded to things asking if something so not an issue was transmisogynistic, or what the problem with TMA/TME was, only to immediately have multiple TRFs zoom into the replies like "don't listen to velvetvexations, she alone has those opinions because she hates all other transfems."

And what about transfems who also need to have it made clear TRFs aren't normal, too? Who need to be gently caught before they get indoctrinated into this shit?

When you see a trans woman saying she thinks it's bad to call non-binary people slurs, identifying as an antigonist gives the messages she's not a random confused baby bird brainwashed by Big Transmisogyny to hate her sisters. She is just one of many who feel that way.

And like, is making it a "faction" like that divisive? I don't think so because holy hell, this discourse is already divisive and toxic as fuck. The intense vitriol that gets thrown at one side from another is already radioactive. What's going to make things worse than it is now? TRFs will have to put up with seeing that other transfems are enthusiastic about disagreeing with them? Those other transfems will feel an us vs. them mentality regarding radical feminists?

A friend of mine put it really well last night:

it isn’t enough to just be ‘normal’ about transmascs and intersex people, actually you do need to be actively working against the now baked in harmful ideologies that have gained traction

I don't want to be normal about these things, I want to be actively anti-transandrophobic, actively anti-intersexist, etc. in a way that sends a clear message to everyone. Being normal about these issues is only normal until it isn't. And even if it forever remained a minority with no threat of growing larger than it is today, TRFs should still have the door slammed in their face until they learn to play nice. If transfems who are Normal really are "normal", then make TRFs feel like pariahs rather than having the unmitigated gall to declare that transmascs invented the transmisogynistic concept of transandrophobia because "2024 is the year transfems united under the banner of transfeminism."

Should we let them have that, and just say oh, well, it's obviously intuitive we're the normal ones and they're the weirdos, we can just quietly continue to consider ourselves the default model of transfem while radical feminism continues to cause more and more division entirely on it's own?

*not that they use that language

anyone may reblog this!

[oh-no-its-bird]

I would love to read founders konoha from the kids, teens and adults based on their interactions so much.

I just want the kids to be 'huh. Not what I was expecting' and just all the horror stories heard

Give the teens so much 'oh no, that's hot' and it's worse bc you were previously enemies so you could pine over an enemy that wasn't available but now it's a chance.

Adults just bonding over their kids antics. Yes I know it would be more but let them bond over than just fighting, though they can be like 'it was cool/difficult move you pulled'

I THINK THAT IT JUST HAS SO MUCH POTENTIAL !!!

Obviously, we see very little of early Konoha as is. And what we do see is all from the perspective of like, those at the very, very top of it, in charge of it all, planning, all that.

THE AMOUNT OF FUCKING "FORBIDDEN ROMANCES" THAT ARE HAPPENING IN THE VILLAGE IS SO REAL THO. LIKE. Ok so u have all these shiobi kids, (many of which are probably wired to be attracted to deadly things, just by virtue of how theyre raised) going from isolated communities where the dating pool consists of arranged marriages and the same guys youve known since u were 5, suddenly thrust into a setting with so many other shinobi kids and clans that it takes actual effort to keep track of. And also you have pre set sterotypes and relationships to go off of just based off of their clan alignment, and all this melodrama about becoming friends (or more) with the people who, a year ago, you were expected to KILL.

And you also have the exact same thing but playing out with allied clans, where some kids are coming to the "rescue" of their allies. I bet some of them like look forward to seeing their allied clan counterparts in whatever monthly or even yearly trips they no doubt beg to be let to go on. Just for the opportunity to see their friends or crushes that one single time a year-- BUT NOW THEY LIVE IN THE SAME VILLAGE !!!

These guys are losing their MINDS

The parents have the most genuine beef between them, even while the children may be louder about it-- but the children's antics are pulling the parents together. Maybe because they need to at least try to set a good example, maybe because they just need someone to be able to share a glance with and go "can you believe this shit?"

I just love thinking ab specifically not even how messy the Uchiha and Senju kids would be living in proximity, but like just tossing in all these different clans from all over.

Bc at first, when its just Senju and Uchiha, its at least straight forward. But then you start mixing in other major clans-- Hyuuga, Nara, and it gets messier. And then the smaller clans are also getting mixed in, Orochi, Hatake, Shiranui, etc. And then more big clans arrive, and even more smaller, and now there are civilians here, and a lot of the younger clan members have never even interacted with a civilian outside of their jobs, and it's just so messy.

What do you do when a battlefield crush is suddenly living only a few minutes away? When you're suddenly seeing them daily? Even potentially going on missions with them? There's going to be so much pigtail pulling and just awful idiot shinobi flirting via mutual harassment

Anyways I firmly believe that there was a major baby boom in the first couple of years of Konoha being founded, many of which were probably idiot teenagers fooling around bc they couldnt manage to go on a mission with an enemy clan member without the crazy tension getting to them, send tweet.

ALSO !!! It would be such a great medium to tackle writing fun clan rumors and stereotypes about clans and also people! I want to see random people gossip about the founders !!!

[hiseyeisonthesparrow]

hi!

im lds too. I mean kinda. my family got shunned by our ward and then stake and its caused a lot of shakiness in my faith. I want to believe and go back but it's so hard when I share my experiences with others and they mitigate my pain and excuse the actions of the men who caused this. Any tips?

Thank you so much for sharing your story with me!

This is going to sound like the opposite of what you are expecting or wanting to hear, but when everyone else in the world seems to have turned their back on you, the most important thing you can do is build your relationship with God and Christ themselves. Sometimes the only people who will fully understand you is the one who created you (God) and the one who felt all the pain and hurt and misery you have experienced, are experiencing, and will ever experience (Jesus).

Going back to the basics of the Gospel has been really important for me -- instead of challenging my faith by trying to understand complex social issues with strong emotions behind them [stuff like queer membership, race in the priesthood, abortion, et cetera], finding things that I know I can believe and trust is important, even if it's as silly or simple as "I believe that some celestial force out there loves me because I was able to buy my favorite shirt before it sold out forever" or "I believe that being in the temple makes me feel peaceful" rather than things I still can't say with confidence like "I know the church is true" or "I believe the nuclear family unit is eternal".

When Covid struck, I was attending a ward in Utah. We kind of absolutely hated it -- after attending multi-cultural, multilanguage wards our whole life, the sudden plainness and overpopulation of Utah wards was so strange to us. Suddenly, lockdowns happened. Church was online and sacrament meetings were held from our home. The year or two we spent doing "home church" -- a weekly Zoom call with our extended family where our cousins would take turns giving talks, and my deacon brother would pass homemade bread to us -- was one of the most spiritually strengthening experience of my life. After Covid restrictions ended, we couldn't go back to our old ward -- none of them would wear masks, and my youngest brother couldn't get vaccinated. We ended up moving our records to a Portuguese branch half an hour north, and it was one of the best decisions we've ever made.

I don't know what your family situation is like. I am not going to pretend like The Power of Christ Can Heal All Intergenerational Trauma. While Christ did help me learn to love my parents and understand their perspective, it did not take away the fact that they did not support me through my most difficult times. But I will say this: if there is anything you can do to possibly come closer to your family, do it. This is a hard experience for all of you, I can imagine. If there is a way you can strengthen each others' testimonies, it will be unimaginably helpful. Finding others who understand the hardships you are going through is one of the best ways to get through it, and it's really convenient if those people have a) known you your whole life, and b) live with you. It may not work. They may never support you or understand your pain. But try.

Instead of turning to hate those who have hurt you, make an effort to focus your energy on the things of the Gospel that make you feel joy. Making death threats to Dallin H. Oaks will never be as helpful as being a good example for those around you, or learning to love Christ's gospel. It will be one of the hardest things you will ever do. But to quote Yoda, "Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering" -- for all parties involved. Allow yourself time to grieve, to be angry, to feel hurt. But simultaneously let those feelings be washed away in time by the healing power of the atonement.

If you ever feel alone or unloved by Christ or far from salvation, you are wrong. There are armies here and on the other side of the veil to bring you back to Him. Some of the strongest testimonies I've ever encountered have been here on Tumblr, by people with backgrounds similar to mine. We are here to help you. That's what being Christ's disciple entails -- helping others. Queerstake and Tumblrstake are here for you. I am here for you. Christ is here for you. Reach out with questions about your faith -- we love to answer them.

(Also if there's an opportunity to sneak into another ward or stake's church services, do it. You don't owe anyone an explanation of who you are or why you're there)

Thank you so much for your ask! I hope I answered the question well enough -- if anyone else has anything they think would be helpful, please share it!!

[polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup]

Just finished reading Pez Dispenser Debris (I don’t even go there but I am fueled by Wiki articles and a love for your storytelling) and first of all—amazing!!! 10/10, I think I need to watch this series now. 

Second, I  noticed that (while very much distinct) Yuuta & Izuku have a lot of similarities in the voice you gave them—maybe it’s the constant panic attacks or perhaps both of  them placing blame for everything squarely on their own shoulders, but ough it makes for the perfect blend of gut-punching angst. I’d love to hear any ramblings you currently have about either of them. I am currently obsessed with both of them now and am placing the blame on you <3

I’m gonna pretty heavily discuss some spoilers for my hero academia in this. I figured that was okay since you’d already read my fanfic and the wiki so the cat is out of the metaphorical bag. That being said, maybe wait to read this answer if you want to not be spoiled for more details in my hero.

Yuuta and Izuku absolutely have the most similar voices out of all of my narrators and it is 90% because they are both completely insane and in violent need of a Xanax and a nice soothing cup of chamomile tea. God I love them both so much. They should each be heavily medicated.

My hero academia is a pretty great watch through the Shie Hassaikai arc. The concept is entertaining, the characters are GREAT, and the world building is really cool.

Then the story sort of. Went to shit.

I tried for a while after that, but eventually had to stop watching. My friends and I have a group chat named “horikoshi just call us” because we got so despondent at the writing decisions after that arc.

Horikoshi. If you’re out there. If you’re reading this. Just call us. We just want to help.

That being said, my love for the characters maintains its death grip on me. I simply adore them. They’re delights.

Yuuta and Izuku, on their face, have a lot of similarities as protagonists. The aforementioned insanity and need of Xanax, of course, but the skeleton of the stories has a lot of common touchstones and themes, like:

Both characters have some kind of history with suicidal ideation or tendencies. In the second scene of JJK0, it’s established that Yuuta canonically tried to kill himself. In the first episode of BNHA, Izuku is told to kill himself by his bullies, in an act which appears to be common to izuku’s life, and the only reason Izuku comes up with to not do it is “then you’d get in trouble for telling me to do it.”

Both characters have severe self worth issues. Yuuta’s looking for a reason to be alive at the start of JJK0. He’s looking for a right to be alive. In a way, Izuku is too at the start of BNHA. At the open of action, he is told by everyone in his life that he is useless. His nickname is “Deku,” which uses some of the same kanji as “Dekunobo,” meaning blockhead. The most direct translation were given is that this is a way of calling him useless. He’s the powerless member of a society choked with superpower, and he’s been told his entire life that he can do nothing, that his dreams are pointless, and that he’s a burden who would be better off dead.

They’re both saddled with power they can’t fully control. Yuuta with Rika, and Izuku with One for All, a transferable power that’s too strong to be contained in his body.

They both have a close relationship with an impossibly strong mentor that they are implied to be the successor of. Yuuta with Gojo, as he’s second only to Gojo in the modern age, and Izuku with All Might (aka Toshinori Yaga), who he is more literally taking on the mantle of One for All from.

They both are chugging that Loving Their Friends Juice and have tried to kill grown men with their bare hands as a result

That all being said, they could not be more different characters and honestly aren’t all that similar.

I have this sort of lasting grievance with literary analysis when people take a list of common plot points or events and use them to make the argument that characters are similar or parallel one another. Like, that’s all facial. The real question is how do they substantively handle those events. How do their story arcs treat those things? How does their character react to them?

Yuuta and Izuku’s actual substantive characters don’t really react to those events in the same way at all. The analysis could go on all day in this respect, really, but the biggest difference is how their respective story arcs treat the cornerstone of their original conflicts.

Yuuta opens action with Rika as the cornerstone of his conflict. She’s who he wants to free, she’s who he’s chained to, and it’s her protection of him that makes him think he deserves to die. Izuku’s cornerstone, meanwhile, is his own Quirklessness. He desperately wants to be a hero, and everyone in his life tells him he can’t be because he is Quirkless. He’s useless because he’s Quirkless. He should kill himself because he’s Quirkless. He’s a burden and always will be because he’s Quirkless.

And while Yuuta’s arc reconciles him with his cornerstone, Izuku’s forgoes it entirely.

The story just. Forgets. That he’s Quirkless. They stop talking about it. It never comes up again. It doesn’t make any real big impact on his character or decisions. It’s one of my biggest axes to grind with how the story developed, and it’s actually one of the biggest reasons why I wrote pez dispenser debris.

Pez dispenser debris was actually inspired by this one piece of my hero academia art where Izuku is hugging his younger self. I don’t know if it was official art or fan art, and I have no idea where it is or where to find it because by god have I tried so I can find it and link it for credit/to boost it. I saw it literally years ago, thought “oh that’s cool,” wrote the original first scene of the fic (where Midoriya stops the bus and is hit by the Quirk), wasn’t feeling it, got distracted by other projects, went to law school, graduated law school, signed up to take the bar exam, and was suddenly electrified in the last fucking month of studying with this fugue state of feverish artistic inspiration. I have never written so easily or so compulsively in my life. I’d write for eight unbroken hours and it would be fucking magic every time. It was like an addiction. I was writhing with a need to create and had so much fucking anxiety about the test I was not studying for instead. The words could not be restrained.

Anyway I taught myself three subjects on the plane ride to the state I was taking it in and passed anyway so it’s fine we’re fine

The moral of the story is that this story has been cooking long enough for me to get two more diplomas than I had when I started it and I have no idea where to find that fucking piece of art that inspired it, but if I find it, I’ll reblog it so y’all can see it too.

The thing is, the narrative sort of forcibly excluding Izuku’s past as Quirkless would make total sense to me if it was used as something Izuku himself was doing.

Izuku necessarily had to hide the truth of his former Quirkless status at the start of action—he needed to keep the secret of One for All. Like, he could not let people find out that a Quirk was transferrable, but you know, just the most powerful one, and also he had it, please come torture it out of him.

But as the narrative goes on, that rationale becomes less important. He has people he can trust with it. And yeah, eventually One for All becomes more known, but the discussion is all about him being all might’s successor. Him being Quirkless and how that affected him and still affects him isn’t really discussed or treated as important. And Izuku doesn’t act like it’s important to him either. He never really thinks about it.

And I just hated that. Like. He spent almost his entire life as a member of society who was spit on. He’s had a Quirk for less than a year. How are his experiences with Quirklessness not important to how he interacts with the world?

The other point of contention I had was Mirio.

Mirio is this superstar of a senpai who takes Izuku under his wing. He has an extremely powerful quirk that’s only as effective as it is because he put in the work and learned how to handle it. He’s a perfect, eternally smiling paragon of heroism. He’s flagged early as the one out of everyone, including heroes with established careers, who is most likely to replace All Might.

He’s also the one who was supposed to get One for All.

His mentor had found him and trained him to be All Might’s successor. Before All Might could meet him, however, he found this feral raccoon child in a sewer and said “oh my god I can’t not offer him incomprehensible power within the first three hours of meeting him” and tripped face first into fatherhood.

During a rescue mission, Mirio loses his Quirk in a way that’s borderline irreversible. There’s no known cure, and the only possible one is dependent on a little girl learning how to control an extremely volatile and dangerous quirk and using it in a way she never has before.

So surely, they’re going to commit to that writing decision, right? He’s Quirkless. We’re bringing back having Quirkless characters. It’s going to be this sick as hell juxtaposition between Izuku and Mirio. We are at least going to force Izuku to reflect on his own times as Quirkless or have some kind of discussion about how Mirio is treated differently now that he is Quirkless.

But no. He gets his Quirk back by the next season. We don’t talk about it much. It’s more of a minor inconvenience than anything.

It’s almost as if the show accepted as an actual rule that you couldn’t be a hero without a Quirk. And then just. Forgot. Everything it had to do with its literal protagonist.

Anyway, I hated it.

In contrast, I fucking loved how yuuta’s storyline with Rika ends. That scene where Yuuta’s turning back to Rika, thanking her for loving him, telling him they can die together? I’m obsessed with it. I recently moved across the country and listened to that theme song on loop during the drive.

Yuuta and Rika’s love was unhealthy. They hurt each other. But it wasn’t malicious.

They just didn’t know how to love each other in a way that didn’t hurt.

They were in shit circumstances. But the love was there.

Yuuta felt guilty for Rika’s love for him and his for her almost the entire narrative. He thought he cursed her with his love. He wanted to kill himself because of how she hurt people out of love for him. It’s why I have moments in sea glass gardens where Yuuta talks about begging Rika to stop loving him—he didn’t know why love had to hurt so goddamn bad, and he’s sorry for that, he really is. He wishes he was better at it than he was.

At the end of JJK0, Yuuta truly is the last person who remembers Rika as she was and still loves her for who she is. He’s faced with Geto, who wants to use her as a weapon. Everyone treats her as a threat or a tool, except for Yuuta.

Like. Just that moment. Of loving someone so genuinely, and being the last one who does, and knowing that everyone else will just use them. I’m obsessed with it.

Yuuta reconciles with his love for Rika and her love for him, and they’re both finally freed. It’s this perfect moment of acceptance that I adore. He comes to terms with his past. It doesn’t hurt him so much anymore.

I wrote pez dispenser debris to sort of force Izuku to have that kind of reconciliation. As it is, he hasn’t reconciled with his own Quirklessness and how that affected him. I wanted to give him something he couldn’t physically escape and had to face.

[caffeinatedopossum]

Getting sick as an adult and having the terrifying realization that when I would get multiple sinus infections a year from my "allergies" and my mom told me I would die if I didn't take my medicine even though I only felt mildly ill...

yeah turns out what she meant by that was not "sinus infections are very deadly" but was in fact "I will not take you to the hospital if this gets so bad that it starts to kill you and I cannot afford a dead kid on my hands"

[todayisafridaynight]

idk what's wrong with rgg studio and why do they need to kill every major antag i mean ?? some of them wasn't THAT irredeemable!!! most of them are just stupid or/and dramatic and i don't know what do THEY think but my HUMBLE OPINION is that half of their antags could have better story ending by NOT DYING and redeeming themselves and being better people !!

aaaand yes i am also salty about aoki i get u man it COULD BE SUCH A BEAUTIFUL STORY ABOUT. ACCEPTING YOUR FUCKUPS AND LIVING WITH THEM. they could have killed sota kume instead if they needed to meet their killing quota no one cares about this mf like whatever

rgg is able to write really compelling characters and villain but they just utterly refuse to commit to a redemption arc. why i dont know but its so frustrating. closest we get is hamazaki but even HE bites the dust and it sucks so much we can't have one (1) redeemed character stick around

aoki's case is the one that makes me want to grind my teeth into dust the most because his death was at the literal very end of the cutscene- there was like thirty seconds left and they just had to fill the quota. ichi had successfully talked him down and had seemingly made a breakthrough to him- HELL, AOKI EVEN SAID HE WAS READY TO TURN HIMSELF IN so for RGG to pull the biggest Go Fuck Yourself is ACTUALLY blood boiling

[valentinesforensics]

I believe In you Gen alpha, they said the same lame shit about every new generation to be born. You're not alien, you're just a human growing up at a tumultuous world with technology that allows you information in the span of microseconds.

Remember to take care of yourself and the people around you. Friends, family, peers, community. Those things are more important than anything else. I can't wait to see the ideas and changes you bring into world.

You'll be okay, time will pass and one day youll be the one considering the social impact of the best generation. Good luck, stay safe out there!

(P.s. One day you will feel cringe over the memes you liked in your youth. Skibidi toilet will haunt you when you're falling asleep at 3am on a random Wednesday evening. ASDF was my beloved as a child, and even now i have to cover my face remembering quoting that shit in Middle school. We all go through it one way or another. It'll be okay.)

[iamthedukeofurl]

Discworld is an interesting beast in the age of ACAB. Like, the city watch books are a story about police and the way in which a good police force can help and protect people. Which would make it copoganda. And I'm not going to say that the City Watch books are completely free of copoganda, but they also do something interesting that fairly few stories about heroic police officers do, and I think it has a lot to do with Samuel Vimes. A lot of copoganda stories like, say, Brooklyn 99, are perfectly capable of portraying cops as cruel, bigoted, and greedy, but our central cast of characters are portrayed as good people who want to help their communities. The result is that the bad cops are portrayed as an aberration, while most cops can be assumed to be good people doing a tough job because they want to help protect people from the nebulous evil forces of "Crime". The police are considered to be naturally heroic. Pratchett does something very interesting, which is provide us with Vimes' perspective, and present us with an Unnaturally heroic police force. In Ahnk-Morpork, the natural state of the watch is a gang with extra paperwork. It's the place for people who, at best, just want a steady paycheck and at worst want an excuse to hit people with a truncheon. Rather than be an army defending people from the forces of Crime, the Watch is described as a sort of sleight-of-hand, big burly watchmen in shiny uniforms don't stand around in-case a Crime happens in their vicinity, they stand around to remind people that The Law exists and has teeth. The Watchmen are people, when danger rears it's head, their instinct is to hide and get out of the way. When faced with authority, their instinct is to bow to it out of fear of what it might do to them if they don't. Carrot is a genuine Hero, but his natural heroism is presented as an aberration. Normal Cops don't act like Carrot does. The fact that the Watch ends up acting like a Heroic Police Force is largely due to the leadership of Sam Vimes, but Vimes himself is a microcosm of the Watch. The base state of Sam Vimes would be an alchoholic bully of an officer, one who beats people until they confess to anything because that makes his job easier. Vimes The Hero is a homunculous, an artificial being created by Sam Vimes fighting back all those instincts and FORCING himself to behave as his conscience dictates. Vimes doesn't take bribes or let his officers do the same because, damnit, that sort of thing shouldn't happen, even if doing so would make things a lot easier. Vimes doesn't run towards sounds of screaming because he WANTS to, he forces himself to do so because somebody needs to. It's best summed up in Thud “Quis custodiet ipsos custodes? Your Grace.” “I know that one,” said Vimes. “Who watches the watchmen? Me, Mr. Pessimal.” “Ah, but who watches you, Your Grace?” said the inspector with a brief little smile. “I do that, too. All the time,” said Vimes. “Believe me.”

In the hands of another writer, or another series, this exchange would be weirdly dismissive. To whom should the police be accountable to? Themselves, shut up and trust us. But from Vimes, it's a different story. Vimes DOES constantly watch himself, and he doesn't trust that bastard, he's known him his entire life. The Heroic Police are not a natural state, they're an ideal, and ahnk-morpork only gets anywhere close. Vimes is constantly struggling against his own instincts to take shortcuts, to let things slide, but he forces himself to live up to that ideal and the Watch follows his example. Discworld doesn't propose any solutions to the problems with policing in the real world. We don't have a Sam Vimes to run the NYPD and force them to behave. We don't have a Carrot Ironfounderson. But it's at least a story about detectives and police that I can read without feeling like I'm being sold propaganda about the Thin Blue Line.

[lightseoul]

a/n. second time writing from bkg's perspective. this was so fun! (1.1k)

the moment that cemented bakugou’s resolve to marry you wasn’t exactly grand.

it wasn’t your first kiss.

or the first time you made love to each other.

not even the first time you met his nerd-ass friends or his (slightly) overbearing parents. although those two come as close runner-ups.

no, it was rather a random saturday morning after you spent a night at his place, now clad in what he thinks is nothing but your intimates and a burnt orange t-shirt of his that drapes loosely over your frame.

and as he enters the kitchen and closes the distance between the two of you with a few strides, he can’t help but wonder what you’re doing—deeply focused on your laptop—when you’re probably the one who’s extra pedantic about not bringing work home.

“morning,” he grunts, leaning down to kiss your cheek, which you happily accept. although, to his chagrin, your eyes remain on your computer screen, not even sparing him a single glance.

he knows it’s fucking embarrassing, how strongly you elicit feelings within him without you even fucking trying, but he can’t stop the frown that takes over his face even if he attempted to fight it.

shaking off the irrational disappointment from not even being ignored, he rounds the kitchen island and starts brewing the two of you coffee.

“by the way,” he starts, glancing at you over his shoulder, “the old hag’s birthday is coming up. she wants to have dinner with just the four of us, or some shit.”

“i know,” you simply pipe up from where you’re seated on one of his fancy bar stools, gaze still glued on whatever the fuck it is that’s keeping your attention from him.

he turns to you, a manual coffee grinder in tow. “you do?”

at that, you finally look up at him, an innocent expression etched across your features. “you don’t remember? i asked you when your parents’ birthdays were way back in march.”

way back in march.

back when you unanimously decided to decisively end the dating phase and become boyfriend-girlfriend.

“yeah?” is the only thing he manages to get out.

you let out a soft laugh that’s nothing but music to his ears. “yeah, dummy.”

before you can get to see the red that’s most definitely creeping up to his cheeks, bakugou turns his back against you, returning to busying himself with crushing the beans into fine powder and pouring lukewarm water into the machine.

only a few months before reaching a full year together, and you still manage to make him fucking blush.

over the most mundane things, too.

when he first got into his very first relationship with you at the ripe age of 28, he thought he’d outgrown and was way past the embarrassing shit that the human body was capable of when dealing with anything remotely close to romance.

it didn’t take him long enough into your relationship to find out he was so, so wrong.

sighing, he pours out the cup of ground beans onto the filter, finally pressing the button and bringing the coffee maker to life.

you must be done with what’s highly likely is work by now.

but chancing a glance at you, he’s once again met with palpable disappointment when the very same sight greets him.

before he can rein them in, the words come tumbling out of his lips.

“the fuck is so important on that laptop?”

his booming voice must’ve caught you off guard, because you startle ever so minutely in your seat.

“sorry,” he quickly adds on, albeit through a mutter; frustration with himself and his inability to modulate his voice added to the increasingly long list of emotions he’s having to fucking deal with right now.

waving him off, you shoot him another one of that disarming smile of yours. “‘s funny that you ask. i was just about to ask you for your opinion.”

with that, you gesture him to come close with your fingers. curious, he once again rounds the island, ultimately occupying the spot to your right and leaning down to peer at the small text on your screen.

before he can even get a word in, you hurriedly explain yourself. “mitsuki-san mentioned her personal sewing machine broke, so i’ve been thinking about getting her a new one.”

you point to a sleek, off-white model among what looks to be a vast array of selections, “i researched the specs and i think this one’s the best. what do you think?”

a million things course through his mind in an instant, but what he ends up sputtering out is: “you’re such a fucking nerd, you know that?”

at that, you look up at him, your seemingly perpetually moisturized lips now formed into a playful pout, and it takes everything in him not to just pull you in for a kiss and completely abandon the conversation in its entirety.

but he’d like to think he at least has the slightest bit of self-control.

even if you do wear him the fuck out on a daily basis.

“i just want to make sure it’s perfect!” you argue, shifting to stare at your laptop again and bringing him back to the present. your voice is way smaller when you continue. “…i want her to like me.”

he doesn’t even miss a beat. “she already fucking does, dumbass.”

and she really does.

the morning after bakugou first brought you to meet his parents a whopping two months into calling it official, mitsuki texted him something along the lines of having the family heirloom slash ring already adjusted to fit your finger.

he immediately called the old hag after receiving the message just to reprimand her ear off for being too fucking forward and for meddling too much.

but, if he were to be completely honest with himself, he was angry not because mitsuki was imposing, but because he couldn’t believe his mother beat him to that important realization.

the realization that maybe, just maybe, you’re the one.

and now, as he studies you as you scroll through more and more iterations of the best sewing machines on the market with your eyebrows adorably furrowed in utmost concentration, it dawns on him.

it dawns on him that that maybe just turned into a definitely.

tagging. @bunnysaursushii @yawnzzzzzzzz @cholios @kashee-h @iluv-ace @lotuslovers @elarakive @sugurusmoon

˖⁺‧₊ this one made me smile like an idiot while writing lmao. as always, reblogs, replies, and tags are appreciated <3 have a nice day!

[txttletale]

Saw a tweet that said something around:

"cannot emphasize enough how horrid chatgpt is, y'all. it's depleting our global power & water supply, stopping us from thinking or writing critically, plagiarizing human artists. today's students are worried they won't have jobs because of AI tools. this isn't a world we deserve"

I've seen some of your AI posts and they seem nuanced, but how would you respond do this? Cause it seems fairly-on point and like the crux of most worries. Sorry if this is a troublesome ask, just trying to learn so any input would be appreciated.

i would simply respond that almost none of that is true.

'depleting the global power and water supply'

something i've seen making the roudns on tumblr is that chatgpt queries use 3 watt-hours per query. wow, that sounds like a lot, especially with all the articles emphasizing that this is ten times as much as google search. let's check some other very common power uses:

running a microwave for ten minutes is 133 watt-hours

gaming on your ps5 for an hour is 200 watt-hours

watching an hour of netflix is 800 watt-hours

and those are just domestic consumer electricty uses!

a single streetlight's typical operation 1.2 kilowatt-hours a day (or 1200 watt-hours)

a digital billboard being on for an hour is 4.7 kilowatt-hours (or 4700 watt-hours)

i think i've proved my point, so let's move on to the bigger picture: there are estimates that AI is going to cause datacenters to double or even triple in power consumption in the next year or two! damn that sounds scary. hey, how significant as a percentage of global power consumption are datecenters?

1-1.5%.

ah. well. nevertheless!

what about that water? yeah, datacenters use a lot of water for cooling. 1.7 billion gallons (microsoft's usage figure for 2021) is a lot of water! of course, when you look at those huge and scary numbers, there's some important context missing. it's not like that water is shipped to venus: some of it is evaporated and the rest is generally recycled in cooling towers. also, not all of the water used is potable--some datacenters cool themselves with filtered wastewater.

most importantly, this number is for all data centers. there's no good way to separate the 'AI' out for that, except to make educated guesses based on power consumption and percentage changes. that water figure isn't all attributable to AI, plenty of it is necessary to simply run regular web servers.

but sure, just taking that number in isolation, i think we can all broadly agree that it's bad that, for example, people are being asked to reduce their household water usage while google waltzes in and takes billions of gallons from those same public reservoirs.

but again, let's put this in perspective: in 2017, coca cola used 289 billion liters of water--that's 7 billion gallons! bayer (formerly monsanto) in 2018 used 124 million cubic meters--that's 32 billion gallons!

so, like. yeah, AI uses electricity, and water, to do a bunch of stuff that is basically silly and frivolous, and that is broadly speaking, as someone who likes living on a planet that is less than 30% on fire, bad. but if you look at the overall numbers involved it is a miniscule drop in the ocean! it is a functional irrelevance! it is not in any way 'depleting' anything!

'stopping us from thinking or writing critically'

this is the same old reactionary canard we hear over and over again in different forms. when was this mythic golden age when everyone was thinking and writing critically? surely we have all heard these same complaints about tiktok, about phones, about the internet itself? if we had been around a few hundred years earlier, we could have heard that "The free access which many young people have to romances, novels, and plays has poisoned the mind and corrupted the morals of many a promising youth."

it is a reactionary narrative of societal degeneration with no basis in anything. yes, it is very funny that laywers have lost the bar for trusting chatgpt to cite cases for them. but if you think that chatgpt somehow prevented them from thinking critically about its output, you're accusing the tail of wagging the dog.

nobody who says shit like "oh wow chatgpt can write every novel and movie now. yiou can just ask chatgpt to give you opinions and ideas and then use them its so great" was, like, sitting in the symposium debating the nature of the sublime before chatgpt released. there is no 'decay', there is no 'decline'. you should be suspicious of those narratives wherever you see them, especially if you are inclined to agree!

plagiarizing human artists

nah. i've been over this ad infinitum--nothing 'AI art' does could be considered plagiarism without a definition so preposterously expansive that it would curtail huge swathes of human creative expression.

AI art models do not contain or reproduce any images. the result of them being trained on images is a very very complex statistical model that contains a lot of large-scale statistical data about all those images put together (and no data about any of those individual images).

to draw a very tortured comparison, imagine you had a great idea for how to make the next Great American Painting. you loaded up a big file of every norman rockwell painting, and you made a gigantic excel spreadsheet. in this spreadsheet you noticed how regularly elements recurred: in each cell you would have something like "naturalistic lighting" or "sexually unawakened farmers" and the % of times it appears in his paintings. from this, you then drew links between these cells--what % of paintings containing sexually unawakened farmers also contained naturalistic lighting? what % also contained a white guy?

then, if you told someone else with moderately competent skill at painting to use your excel spreadsheet to generate a Great American Painting, you would likely end up with something that is recognizably similar to a Norman Rockwell painting: but any charge of 'plagiarism' would be absolutely fucking absurd!

this is a gross oversimplification, of course, but it is much closer to how AI art works than the 'collage machine' description most people who are all het up about plagiarism talk about--and if it were a collage machine, it would still not be plagiarising because collages aren't plagiarism.

(for a better and smarter explanation of the process from soneone who actually understands it check out this great twitter thread by @reachartwork)

today's students are worried they won't have jobs because of AI tools

i mean, this is true! AI tools are definitely going to destroy livelihoods. they will increase productivty for skilled writers and artists who learn to use them, which will immiserate those jobs--they will outright replace a lot of artists and writers for whom quality is not actually important to the work they do (this has already essentially happened to the SEO slop website industry and is in the process of happening to stock images).

jobs in, for example, product support are being cut for chatgpt. and that sucks for everyone involved. but this isn't some unique evil of chatgpt or machine learning, this is just the effect that technological innovation has on industries under capitalism!

there are plenty of innovations that wiped out other job sectors overnight. the camera was disastrous for portrait artists. the spinning jenny was famously disastrous for the hand-textile workers from which the luddites drew their ranks. retail work was hit hard by self-checkout machines. this is the shape of every single innovation that can increase productivity, as marx explains in wage labour and capital:

“The greater division of labour enables one labourer to accomplish the work of five, 10, or 20 labourers; it therefore increases competition among the labourers fivefold, tenfold, or twentyfold. The labourers compete not only by selling themselves one cheaper than the other, but also by one doing the work of five, 10, or 20; and they are forced to compete in this manner by the division of labour, which is introduced and steadily improved by capital. Furthermore, to the same degree in which the division of labour increases, is the labour simplified. The special skill of the labourer becomes worthless. He becomes transformed into a simple monotonous force of production, with neither physical nor mental elasticity. His work becomes accessible to all; therefore competitors press upon him from all sides. Moreover, it must be remembered that the more simple, the more easily learned the work is, so much the less is its cost to production, the expense of its acquisition, and so much the lower must the wages sink – for, like the price of any other commodity, they are determined by the cost of production. Therefore, in the same manner in which labour becomes more unsatisfactory, more repulsive, do competition increase and wages decrease”

this is the process by which every technological advancement is used to increase the domination of the owning class over the working class. not due to some inherent flaw or malice of the technology itself, but due to the material realtions of production.

so again the overarching point is that none of this is uniquely symptomatic of AI art or whatever ever most recent technological innovation. it is symptomatic of capitalism. we remember the luddites primarily for failing and not accomplishing anything of meaning.

if you think it's bad that this new technology is being used with no consideration for the planet, for social good, for the flourishing of human beings, then i agree with you! but then your problem shouldn't be with the technology--it should be with the economic system under which its use is controlled and dictated by the bourgeoisie.

[fuck-you-too-world]

I- you- WHY?!?!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA NOOOOOOOOO!!

YOU CAN'T HURT ME AND THE HIM LIKE THIS!!!! NOOOOOOOO!!!

You actually made is everyone's problem

（┬┬＿┬┬）

Poor Danny... Getting pregnant and have a miscarriage all over and over and over again??? I am so killing someone, Preferably a certain Timtam Duck :D

I play favorit after all and Danny is my favorit.

How many child must he have miscarriage of? How many soul wasted and damned to never be borned? How many times must he grief for bisa children over and over and over again? Unable to do anything, you're right. No one would come out of that without having something gone wrong and boy... Where the fuck is that old clock when he was needed!!! ୧( ಠ Д ಠ )୨

Hm... It would be nice if the magical community part learn of this information about Danny having miscarriage cuz the one who got the infor was some sprti of Dream Demon and saw what happened, and children to the magical is a sacred gift that must be treated with utmost love and care. So Danny having to relief the Pain of losing his children while trapped cuz he couldn't get the needed nutritiom to sustain and nurture his babies was Horrifying to them and devasting to most mothers.

... Oh no... Oh Lord Mr. Fool, have mercy... You actually made this my problem and now I got an I. D. E. A.

You know what? ✨Fuck it✨

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wulf finally manage to track down Danny after his disappearance for like a hundred year or so, the Realm was in shambles more than it already was since their future King went missing. Their High Prince was missing!!!

Finally they got a lead or more like an information and that information was given to them by a demon named Lucifer. Someone has trapped their Prince and impregnante him while also imprisoning him causing him to miscarriage over and over and over again!!!!

GGGRRRRRHHHH!!!

They will pay for the pain that has caused their beloved Prince!

Humans have always hurt their Prince no matter how nice and kind their Prince has been with them, he was a child and still is! The stuff he has been through and been put through is not something they wished or wanted to happen to him yet it did! They should've tried harder to convince them to stay and leave the living realm, now their Prince is the one to pay the price.

Their Prince is in hiding, away from the humans. Away from his- no, not his soulmate. Never his soulmate and should have never been! Wulf could barely contain his growl of rage at the thought, they hope they could still save what little left of their bright, cheerful Prince. They know their Prince would never lose their kindness and love for the living but their Prince could never be the same again after the horrible situation he was put in. Never.

They could only hope that they wouldn't be too late to at least save a broken part of their Prince and help him heal. Oh, how Wulf desperately wanted to use the W-word but they know better than to.

Whimper

Ah...

"Shhh, it's alright little one, your people will be here soon."

Hiccup

"They have been searching for you since you went missing young Prince.. "

Wulf run and cut straight to the air where he could hear his Prince- His Friend- cry of pain and anguis but he could feel his hope and fear -fear of having his expectation to be met with dissapointmen- and the moment Wulf tear a whole through dimension, he was meet with such a painful and horrible sight of his friend.

"... Amiko"

Danny's head snap so quick that Wulf worried he might accidentally hurt himself in his weakened state, Wulf could see his once bright eyes full of live has dulled and as big as plate as Danny stare at Wulf for a long minutes. In that long minutes - which is actually just a mere few seconds but it's still to much for Wulf- they could see clearly of the cores (the cores of Danny's children who couldn't develop properly and fully because of the lack of nutriens from his human half and and there's even few wulf could see to have almost fully developed, yet they didn't make it), the cores of ghostlings that the more wulf looked at them the more pain he felt for his Prince, his friend.

Then wulf also took notice of the woman beside Danny, who seems to be the source of the other voice that has tried to soothe and calm him as she was giving Wulf a look that wulf know so well. After all, everyone in the Realm has the same expression on their face as well as wulf themselves. Then wulf got a handful of crying halfa who finally let the dam lose, wulf only hold him gently but firmly and cradle him in his paws and closely to his chest letting his core huum and thrum to soothe him.

Not long after he fell to uneasy sleep out of exhaustion, in his hand clutching one of the cores that has almost fully developed. Wulf know what that means, it was his first child. The very first one that he manage to keep until his body unable to sustain his body anymore and fail him right when his child has a fully matured core. This is unfair.

Wulf cried silently as they cradle their friend and mourn for him, for his children for all the innocent cores that never got to mature and took for to explore the infinite realm and know about their wonderful carrier, wulf mourn for his friend that has to went through hell of the hell and yet never catch a break, wulf mourn for his friend as he lost his bright and livelihood as he lost his wonder and curiosity, wulf mourn for the ghostling that has to went through so much and has to went through a pain of a carrier because those from the realm have a hard time to have their own little ghostling and that having ghostling was a delicate and painful process, yet their friend went through it over and over while he's losing all of his ghostling.

Wulf didn't know for how long they were sitting there holding Danny protectively in their paws but the woman from before has already left, having put the many many cores that was scatered around and burrying half of him on the ground inside the box. It was left near them with blankets inside it, as if to keep the cores warm and comfortable- wasn't that a thought? Wulf couldn't help but wonder, was Danny's mind filled with the what if of his children cooing and giggling as he played with them? Wulf didn't entertain that thought as he feared for the pain it would cause them. Their core aches the loss.

Danny would love to give his children a proper graves and places to rest but that is a future problem, for now? It is time for Danny Phantom to come home.

"Ni iru viro... Mia amiko.. "

(The esperanto was from Google Translate so sorry it's wrong)

.

.

.

.

.

Constantine woke up with a killer headache as he tried to open his eyes with effort, he groans at the stabbing pain to his eyes. He lay down with eyes closed for them minutes before he could sit up with sore muscles and pounding head.

He felt like something big is around the corner of the ready to pounce on him yet not him at the same time.

"Uuuugh... Fucking demons.. "

He rub his temple and tried to stand up, he staggers and fall face first with a pained grunt.

"My~ my~ who would've thought the John Constantine is so weak he couldn't even stand upon waking up?"

His head snap up so fast he could hear his neck crack loudly, 'that's gonna hurt later'

"Lucifer" he growl out as he hastily stand up to get some sambelance of control over his uncooperative body.

Lucifer only laughter at his attempt as he sit by the single sofa at the end of the bed.

"Don't worry Constantine, I'm not here for you. I have another more important agenda" he waves his hand dissmisively with a smirk.

Constantine narrow his eyes in suspicion yet he couldn't rack his brain hard enough to think of what else this demon wanted from him other than his mess and bad decisions caught up to bite his ass?

Then suddenly, the relaxed demeanor and playful smirk vanish as Lucifer's eyes turn cold and staring him down as if he's staring at his soul - he probably is - and with such jab and ferocious he spoke.

"You mortals has played with something you shouldn't have messed with, you hurt one of ours. You hurt the concept of Balance and cause them so much grief, pain and agony. This is a warning, the one and only so listen carefully and make sure your cute little band of heroes know this Johnathan Constantine"

Slowly his voice turn into something distorted and less human as furry and rage filled his eyes.

"Prepare for retribution, prepare for judgement, prepare to pay for the sins you have committed towards the Hight Prince of Infinite Realm. For the Armageddon shall see to it, their Prince would get justice. Three moons later, when the sun sleep and stars shine brighter than the day you will face your punishment."

Then in burst of hell flame he vanish, leaving behind a big torch on the floor and a very much terrified alkoholic smoker

.

.

.

Might I add that in my mind, the supranatural and magical world is not one with infinitely Realm, like they're on a different layer but the ancients in the Realm is like godly beings born from a concept (I read this on a prompt but I can't remember where! If someone knows and remember please tell me so I can tag them and give credit (´；д；`) please) so they're like the geek mythology and all but more powerful since... Y'know, the ded part? Even though they're kinda like a different species, I'm not genius enough to come up with something for that sooooo

And the head canon I thought of is that for the supernatural and Realm occupants, having their own child is hard and children are very sacred for them. That's why the supernatural has lots of hybrid and another way to gain more of their kind, because reproduction is just an option that has a high risk. Doesn't mean they never tried or ban it, just have a low success rate is all and a high risk as well as fragile pregnancy.

Danny being able to get pregnant over and over again was because of his halfa status and what with Tim got turned into one, I thought it's kinda like they have the resonance and DNA and their would mark to reinforce it.

So the supernatural kinda go feral since Danny is still a child in the Realm culture and he got impregnated then have miscarriage until he's reaching a the teenagers age by the Realm standard is a big crime, especially since he's the High Prince, they may not have a good or close relationship with the Infinite Realm cuz of the previous King but the next future King wasn't bad. There was supposed to have a meeting to sort out the past problem caused by the former King between Lucifer and the High Prince right before his disappearance.

Coupled with their most sacred, taboo and big no no thing to commit against was done so many times.

Children are sacred being that is bestowed upon them and are a blessings.

You should never attempt at children.

Ever.

Even Danny's rough gallery before wasn't really trying to hurt him since some of them was also children that's couple decades older than him, or some older ones that tried to teach him. They have a different way of teaching a newly formed children and it was with fighting where they would subtly correct them and nudge them to the right place to get better, this was done to taught them how to defend themselves and survive. After all, not all would be kind the same with humans where there's good then there'll also be bad.

So...anyone remember that version of the Rejected Soulmate AU where Danny turns Tim into a Halfa against his will and Tim developed picture powers and trapped Phantom in a painting?

Well I do and I'm about to make it everyone else's problem.

When Danny is finally released from the painting he is not okay. He had been trapped in an attic where pretty much no one went to and then everyone outright avoided for years.

He was essentially stuck in solitary confinement for Ancients know how long. People don't just walk away from that and get to be perfectly sane afterwords. Whats more was that Dannys core was damaged right before being picturefied. Usually the damage sustained would have been nothing more than the equivalent of a skinned knee but being surrounded on all sides by the essence or not only another ghost but another Halfa...well...when two ghosts mix thier essences together they can create a new core.

A baby.

Unfortunately for Phantom both of them were Halfas and Danny had no access to human requirements such as food and water.

Phantoms body couldn't handle the strain of a pregnancy and he had a miscarriage. Worse still, he was constantly surrounded by Tim's essence so he just...kept getting pregnant and kept having miscarriage after miscarriage. When Danny was released he sobbed. It wasn't unusual so hear sobbing or crying from what was dubbed "Dannys room" all around him were the empty cores of the children he had lost, splayed across the floor without a glow and without a life. He looked up at the wall he had been hanging on and saw a distinct discoloration where his portrait used to be. For the love of the Ancients, how long had be been trapped there??

Danny eventually managed to calm down and went over to one of the boxes that hadn't been touched since Alfred stopped coming he tried not to think about that and quietly dumped the contents out onto the floor and used the box to gather up the so many far too many cores.

He would hold a funeral for them all at a later date, but for now he needed to escape the manor.

Sneaking down the stairs he kept his senses sharp. There seemed to be no one in the manor and it appeared to have been that way for quite some time. Alfred would rise from the grave himself if he knew how much dust had accumulated in his absence.

Danny walked past a puddle on the living room floor absently noting the large stain on the ceiling that periodically let a drop splash down into the dampness below. What had happened here? Clearly Tim hadn't died the rest of the way anytime soon after locking Danny up and throwing away the key, so what was up with the manor? How long had Danny been gone? Did they abandon him along with the house? That thought sent his stomach churning.

He knew Tim didn't want him. He had been okay with that so long as he played with him. Most soulmate bonds were platonic and Danny wasn't above pestering someone for attention. Red Robin had almost always seemed annoyed by his presence though and never really gave him a chance even when he seemed to be having fun with whatever "mini game" he had constructed (he made sure to base them off of Reds own hobbies and likes) he had seemed to be holding himself back. Tim never opened up to Danny.

Now Danny was the one trying to avoid Tim as he slipped out one of the manors secret passageways. Thank you old school money and your paranoid aristocrats. He wondered it Bruce even knew of all the secret passageways the Phantom had scoped out in Wayne Manor as he slipped out of a bush behind some old house on another property. Judging on how he had to phase his way out of the hidden door and under the bushes roots he'd go out on a limb and guess no one had used this one in quite a while.

He decided to still stick to the shadows. Even if he had escaped the manor it didn't change the fact that if Tim didn't already know he escaped he would soon enough and would be out looking for him with the rest of the furry patrol.

What about Hood? Did he still hate him? Danny wasn't even sure what went wrong. One day they were friends and then the next he wouldn't even look at him. Did Tim say something? Would he stoop so low? Either way he didn't think Hood would help him. He could feel Hoods Ecto-signature over in the direction of Crime Alley so he couldn't have been trapped for two long, right?

Wrong. So so wrong. According to the date on the electronic billboard he had been trapped for 133 years. Ancients. In other news Tim Drake had been attacked and fallen into a coma not too long ago, which would explain why Danny was free and not being chased. That and his collar that hid his ecto signature. Every day he's thankful for it.

Now would be the best time to leave Gotham. Now while everyone is distracted and Tim can't shove Danny back into his own private Hell.

By the time Tim realizes Danny is missing he will already be long gone.

[sidsinning]

Apothecary Diaries is pog as fuck bc serious political issues and dynamics from a woman's POV are rarely depicted in ANY form of media

It's always a man's world where women's issues surround him. Even if we get a female perspective once in awhile- it all comes back to how it facilitates his game in the end. She's a footnote in the overarching scheme of things. Misogyny exists. Back to the real plot.

Apothecary Diaries is strictly from a female perspective and how each class of woman has to act, what limits they have, what rights they have and don't have between each class, etc. These women have to behave a certain way under a patriarchy, which you would think makes it a man's story, but it never is. The women are THE focus of this show, their struggles are THE plot. The focus is about how the patriarch effects them.

Take the concubines for example. The show dives into how bearing a child affects their rank, how traumatizing it is to lose that child, the consequences of that, etc. We have barely seen the emperor who sired all these kids because this is not about him.

Jinshi's personal plot is secondary to Mao Mao's journey- he is mostly there to provide new cases for Mao Mao to solve and to learn more about the shortcomings of his class when taking care of citizens like Mao Mao.

Jinshi is not a bad person, but by virtue of his position in the higher classes, he cannot understand how harsh life as a poor WOMAN is specifically- he can only catch glimpses of it from what Mao Mao tells him and feel outrage but powerless in his wealth and luxury

Mao Mao is a fortunate commoner woman for what privileges someone in her class should and shouldn't have. She happened to be adopted by a knowledgeable man. She is allowed to read, write, learn, and has enough skill to be a poison tester and have a job EXTREMELY out of her class limit as an apothecary, also a job not traditionally meant for women

Mao Mao is not a "noT lIkE oThER gIrLs" protagonist, she is FOR THE GIRLIES. She only wants to help the women around her, and women are whom she has the closest relationships to. She sees a woman being harassed and can't let it stand. She sees a frail, traumatized woman dying from the recklessness of those who should be caring for her and spends day and night nursing her back to health, while also punishing the people who were so careless with her needs.

My girl has STUDIED UP on THE BODY to TEACH these upper class ladies on how to really HEAT things up in the BEDROOM

Sex depicted in Apothecary Diaries is both something women are not shamed to be enjoying, while at the same time being acknowledged as an unfortunately huge economic necessity to market themselves.

Like shit is just so real in this series???

Listen, I can go on and on about how GOATED the series and especially Mao Mao is but you get the picture

[blkkizzat]

YAKUZA!TOJI X MILF!READER —aka toji on some joe goldberg bullshit

🎞️ 𝐒𝟏 𝐄𝟐:

⟢ rating: mdni 18+ stalking, yuji is yakuza!sukuna x reader child, toji is still delulu af, size-kink, milf kink, breeding kink, voyeurism, dilf!toji, dissociative sexual fantasies, sukuna is an asshole, masturbation, killing fantasies, obsessive tendencies, heavy manipulation, brooding, yandere fluff, cute kid megumi.

⟢ episode run time: 𝟖.𝟕𝐤 ⟢ episode list: m.list ⟢ subscriber access: please comment on m.list to be tagged, rather than individual episodes as its easier for me to track. ⟢ director's note: e2 is here!! sorry for the initial issues! i hope you guys enjoy as we go deeper into toji's delulu, it's so much fun writing from his perspective. i feel like with each epi he only gets worse, hfsvsdjkfhvbsdj. he's still daddy tho.

The sky has since fallen completely dark, but the city lights of Tokyo still twinkle brightly in the distance, drowning out any stars. The light pollution still appears beautiful though, as a comforting beacon of civilization in the surrounding darkness.

The atmosphere, which had previously been so violently vibrant, has now quieted to a muted calm as the world slows down, whipping cool night air around Toji’s tense frame on his balcony.

However, it does fuck all to soothe the seared edges of his temper. 

Nor does the serene scene do anything to calm the heated exchange still taking place inside your condo.

Your domestic dispute with Sukuna fiercely rages on.

Toji savors the last few puffs of his cigarette before discarding it and quickly lighting another. Chain smoking is his last salvation, lest the persistent urge to protect you completely overtakes him and causes him to act rashly.

The current state of the organization had suspicions at an all-time high. Toji couldn’t afford that considering who he was dealing with and what all could come in between the two of you should he err from the plan. 

Closing his eyes, Toji manages to regain control by doing the one thing that never failed to pacify him—thinking of you, of course. 

Both the sweet poison and the bitter antidote to Toji, you do nothing but constantly plague his psyche. 

But perhaps it’s that he knows you need him as much as he realizes he needs you. 

Over the course of time he had watched you, it didn’t take long for Toji to conclude that you only chose to remain with Sukuna for the security he provided. Preservation and the obligations of motherhood were the only logical motivations you could have.

It was glaringly apparent that Sukuna didn’t love you. 

Even a blind man could see the truth of it.

Sukuna only visited you on rare occasions, when yakuza business took him beyond the central city limits, as Toji’s own surveillance and connections had revealed. 

And whenever he did show up, it usually led to arguments between the two of you. If you had indeed loved Sukuna at one point you weren’t foolish enough to hold onto any of those illusions now. 

Moreover, the subject of illusions—Toji had been privy to having many fantasies of you.

Weathering away at the stone around his heart he strived his whole life to build—only to then rebuild once again after his late wife—addictingly sweet visions of you so swiftly demolish the walls he set in place.

Toji allowed himself many hopeful images of what life could be like with you. 

A life of ease. 

That said, it would never be too easy. 

Toji is still a yakuza himself and he knew the organization would never let him walk away entirely. 

Nevertheless, his role was somewhat unique—an executive assassin was almost unheard of. Toji took on as many kills as he did as a way to numb and distract himself, not because it was required of him or he couldn’t pass it off to another. And ever since he’d laid eyes on you he had no desire to busy himself with anything other than you.

Toji takes pleasure in knowing he wouldn’t ever have to be away from you for long too. 

As it happens, he already owns a spacious five-bedroom home just outside Tokyo in Chiba—the previous home he had hoped to share with his late wife. Toji had planned to surprise her with it once she left the hospital.

Yet instead of leaving the hospital with Megumi’s mother by his side, Toji had walked out alone. Numbed to the world, his hand had gripped the sleek black urn that had mockingly held her remains—along with his shattered hopes.

And as a result, no one had even crossed the threshold since the purchase was made.

But that would change though now that there would be the four of you to breathe life into the home.

Who else could give you that kind of life but Toji? 

Certainly not Sukuna.

Toji would give you everything if you let him—but you weren’t an easy conquest, something he learned quickly as you prove it to him time and time again.

⟡

Toji recalls your second encounter with a sharpened clarity. It had taken him only two weeks to meticulously study your habits. The encounter had been carefully orchestrated, but despite his planning, the day hadn’t quite unfolded as Toji anticipated to say the least.

Parked down on the block of your typical walking path, Toji sat in his blacked-out Mercedes, keeping an eye on his rear-view mirror monitoring your approach. The mirror also showed Megumi, who was peacefully dozing in the backseat.

Heh, yeah he’d made damn sure to have the kid with him back then too.

Hardly older than 18 months and already a lady-killer, Megumi never failed to melt the heart of any woman who laid eyes upon his abundant chubby-cheeked cuteness. 

Not like Toji had ever really needed to expend the effort before now. He knew just a mere look from him could get panties leaking, but you’d be harder to conquer than that. 

Toji would enjoy taking his time, which if he thought about previously he would have deemed odd—he’d never been one to hold himself back or take his time with a woman.  

Not anymore. 

Not since her at least. 

But the agony that had accompanied thoughts of his late wife had dulled considerably since he’d first started observing you. 

A bonus of that being it no longer hurts as much to see Megumi—not when he would picture you rocking him in your arms.

Toji had even gone so far as to believe that she would have approved, that she would have liked you. He imagined she would have gladly chosen you to take care of both Megumi and him if she’d known you.

A familiar form appears in the rear-view mirror and Toji knows it’s game time.

Here you were, a reward for his diligence in tracking your habits, right on schedule.

Your features sparkled in the summer sun as you pushed Yuji along in his stroller, humming a tune while the child giggled along clapping. 

The kid’s bubbly deposition had to come from you, Toji decided—surely none of it could have come from, nor been influenced by, Sukuna. 

Toji wondered if you could even make a somber child like Megumi smile.

Biding in-wait until you passed, Toji snatched up Megumi and kept far enough distance so as to not alarm you of his presence. 

His original plan had been to exit the car as you passed by and walk into the store together. But that all changed when Toji got the first glimpse of what you were wearing. 

Toji would avoid being noticed by you, but your attire made it near impossible for him not to notice you.

The dress you wore was barely made modest enough to wear in public by the cardigan you draped over it. A less curvaceous woman could have likely pulled it off without turning a head.  

However on your body, the way the thin loose fabric hung off your shape as it clung onto the moist areas of perspiration like a second skin—was fucking obscene. 

Especially as despite your continued efforts, the crack of your ass kept gobbling up your sundress no matter how many times you subtly tried to yank it free.

Toji bet your ass could swallow his cock up just as well. 

Damn.

Toji wished the walkup to the store was longer. 

He’d never been one for prayer, but he would have started if whatever God deemed it fit right at that very moment to send an unanticipated gust of wind. 

Your lack of panty line had his mind racing as to whether you wore a thong or were just slutty enough to be outside bare-assed in a short sundress mid-afternoon.

The green of your sundress matched his eyes too and Toji took it as another sign from the universe, he was on the right path by pursuing you like this.

You were doing this intentionally just to tease him, weren't you? 

Hoping he’d see you like this and to tempt him into taking a peek, right?

Entering the grocery store, Megumi seated in-cart, Toji continued tailing you as you shopped.

True to the homemaker he previously confirmed you to be, you picked up mostly fresh produce, prime cuts of meat from the butcher, and some pantry baking items. 

You were capable of more than just the frozen dinners he’d be more accustomed to if not for his Nanny’s cooking. She was a decent enough cook too—but she wasn’t you. 

Nothing she cooked smelled a fraction as good as the mostly foreign, but appetizing, smells that wafted from under your door to fill the hall with warm spices.

The food you would make him, once Toji gets you settled in your new home, would definitely be much better. 

You were truly perfect, well nearly so.

After tailing you down a few aisles, Toji suspects the one minor flaw you may have is you appeared to be the absentminded type. 

How else could you be disregarding his overbearing presence as he continuously had put himself in your line of vision? Restlessness overtook Toji as he waited for you to look up and catch his eye, giving him a casual opening.

You had been too consumed with your phone to notice his attempts— which if he would guess, wouldn’t be successful anytime soon. 

Grumbling, Toji had to take matters into his own hands if he wanted to shop with you at all.

Easy enough too, you were already so carelessly distracted.

Momentarily taking his eyes off you, Toji calculated how long it would take you to reach the end of the aisle. So as you moved from one aisle to the next, he casually nudged his cart into your path, creating a T-bone collision that made it look like you were at fault for leaving the aisle.

The bang was jolting enough to finally draw your attention.

“OH MY GOD! I WASN’T WATCHING WHERE I WAS GOING! I’M SO SORRY– I-I …Fushiguro?!”

Heh, took ya long enough to notice. 

“Well, hey doll. Long time no see, ma.”

A flagrant lie. 

Toji had seen you nearly everyday—you just hadn’t seen him. 

He could tell you were flustered and embarrassed as multiple heads in the store had turned towards the two of you from the rattling collision. 

You couldn’t apologize enough to Toji who was on cloud nine from your attention focused on him.

And as Toji had predicted, your attention was soon stolen by the black spikey haired baby boy seated in his cart.

“Oh wow Fushiguro!!—” 

“—Toji, ma.”

A smirk bloomed across his features as you rolled your eyes at him, continuing your affections towards Megumi.

“—I remember you said you had a son but I didn’t know you had a little mini-me, he’s so adorable!”

Toji didn’t fail to notice the double—no triple, take you had given between himself and Megumi. 

He also couldn't help but see how your big ass tiddies looked—like they wanted to bounce right outta that sundress and into his mouth—as you bent down to get a closer look at Megumi. 

No bra too?

Oh, you’d surely be the death of him.

But Toji's cock wasn’t the only part of him swelling, his heart rate sped like crazy just from watching you fuss over Megumi so apologetically—much like a loving mom soothing her own child at the sight of him sniffling back tears. 

For a moment, Yuji’s giggling drew Toji’s attention as the boisterous kid seemed to think it was some sort of ride. Needing no comfort at all, Yuji merrily squealed with laughter at the impact, continuing to stuff rice puff snacks into his little face.

The distraction kept Toji from warning you not to pick up Megumi and before he Toji knew what was happening— you scooped Megumi up. Settling Megumi into your arms, Toji noted you cradled him with the same joy radiating from you as you did Yuji—and much to Toji’s shock—Megumi let you.

It went without saying that Megumi wasn't the friendliest kid. 

Toji suspected he had inherited that from him, along with his trademark scowl. The little terror was known to pitch a screaming fit if someone other than Toji or his nanny picked him up. 

However, in your hold, Megumi appeared calm—angel-like even—as far as Toji was concerned.

More curious than upset, Megumi's tears dried at the corners of his eyes as he reached out to gently bop your nose with his tiny fist.

“Aye! Manners, kiddo.”

Toji chides Megumi, but inside he is amazed by the interaction. 

Returning the gesture, you softly boop Megumi's nose with the pad of your finger, causing him to grab it in defiance, as you offered him softly whispered apologies for upsetting him.

This served to confirm in Toji’s mind the place you belonged in his life. 

He couldn’t be wrong about you. 

You were perfect.

Everything was aligning better than he could have hoped for.

“No harm done ma, Megumi can take a lick. Just like his daddy.” 

You shook your head at Toji and gently rubbed soothing circles on Megumi’s back, cooing at him.

“Oh? So you’re growing up strong like your daddy, huh, Megumi?”

Megumi tilted his head slightly, his thumb resting gently in his mouth.

“Just don’t fool yourself into thinking you’re smooth like he does.”

You shot Toji a teasing smirk, immediately resulting in a half chub pressed against his suit pants.

Now you were… teasing him? 

Oh, you had no fucking idea just how smooth Toji could be when he wanted. And Toji planned to put 3 more kids inside of you soon too, just as smoothly.

Those facts withstanding, Toji could tell his son hadn’t quite made up his mind about you yet. Megumi just blinked at you, but the fact that he wasn't screaming his head off was good enough for Toji.

“Don’t let the blank stare fool you, ma, he likes you. Trust, ya would know if he didn’t. Just takes him a while to warm up to most folks.”

You gave Toji another playful smile.

“Hmm, and wonder who he got that from?”

Primal urges surged in his veins as Toji wanted nothing more than to grab you in his arms at that moment, although Toji settled for countering with a smirk of his own.

“We’re not that bad ma—once you get to know us.”

Toji flashed a toothy grin at you, amused by the upward pull at the corners of your lips as you tried and failed, not to be entertained by him. 

You gently set Megumi back down in the cart, smoothing down his onesie and safely buckling him in before turning back to Toji.

“I’m sure Megumi is a perfectly sweet kid, who just needs to come into his own a bit.”

“Eh? And whadda ‘bout me, mamas?”

“The jury is still out on you—Fushiguro.”

“—Toji,” he corrected once again—and again you responded by rolling your pretty eyes under those long thick lashes of yours.

Oh, Toji had just the thing for that ass since you liked to roll your eyes back that much. 

Toji imagined how deeply they’d be lodged into your head once he stuffed you full of his fat cock—all in one go—effectively pushing your guts up into your chest. 

Yeah, he had it bad for you—real bad.

Unable to stop the many intrusive sexual thoughts that would spring in his mind just from being close enough to smell the scent of your sweet vanilla and jasmine perfume.

Yet Toji couldn’t let the chance pass to press his limits with you.

“So—How about ya give me y’er number so we can set up a playdate, eh? Since ya think Megumi’s such a sweet kid and all, mamas.” 

Caught off guard, you looked away from Toji in contemplation, chewing on your lip.

“Hm... I-I don't think that’s such a good idea, Fushiguro.”

You shift your stance a bit, taking on a defensive posture. 

Tch, fuck. You’d be harder to crack than Toji originally thought. 

Plus you seemed to still have some loyalty to Sukuna, even if you held no love for him.

But that was all fine, Toji calculates—a good thing even.

That just meant you would be all the more loyal to him once he did have you.  

Thinking on his feet, Toji subtly switches tactics, playing dumb as he lifts a brow.

“Toji, doll, but ya know what I do for work. Think I gots time to be babysitting brats? What, s’not a good idea for the nanny to bring Gumi by?”

“Oh! Of course the nanny! Yeah that’s fine, erm, that's… sorry. I thought—”

“—thought, what mamas? You tryna get a playdate with me too? ”

Toji couldn’t hold back his laughter as your eyes widened in shock. 

Embarrassment washed over you like a tsunami, intensified by Toji's teasing. You hid half your face with one hand while the other gripped the grocery cart handle so tightly that Toji half-expected it to snap off.

“Kiddin’ ma—lighten up a ‘lil eh? Ya left y’erself wide open for that one, doll.”

Sighing in defeat, you finally conceded to his charms, exchanging numbers with him solely so his nanny could coordinate the playdates.

“I see you think you got jokes, Fushiguro.”

Toji relished the win as your smile returned. 

“Ya know I do—and it's Toji, mama.”

With that shift, Toji was pleased to see you gradually lower your guard around him, the ice between you started to melt. You continued your shopping together, Toji casually picking up a few items, occasionally seeking your advice on what to feed Megumi.

Truth be told, he had no idea. The nanny always handled all the shopping.

Subtly taking the lead in the conversation, Toji casually provoked you into revealing more about yourself. Details he couldn’t piece together—like where you grew up, what your life was like before Japan and what brought you here—all which he cataloged meticulously in his mind. 

Toji wanted to ask how a smart girl planning to be a doctor with a full-ride exchange program scholarship to Tokyo University got knocked up by a dumb fuckhead like Ryomen Sukuna—but the very last thing he wanted you to think about when you were with him was Sukuna.  

However, each piece of information he learned of you convinced him more of how much he wanted you—

“Oh yeah, Fushiguro! Despite what you said, I actually managed to make a friend!”

–all to himself.

Tch, a fuckin’ friend?

Toji’s demeanor darkened, but you didn’t notice—too busy humming to yourself while checking apples for bruises in the produce section.

Not like this information came as a particular surprise to him, Toji's eyes narrowed as he could guess exactly who it was right away.

Toji had seen the tall raven-haired woman whose afternoon jogs in the park so-conveniently aligned with your walks with Yuji. You both would exchange pleasantries as she admired your son, and you her commitment to fitness, that you would say you never seemed to have the time for these days. 

Yet your interactions from what he had seen never ventured much beyond that. 

Although Toji would normally oblige you a few friends, having a friend here would complicate his plans.

The women of The Nursery up until now had done such a good job in isolating you all on their own without him having to lift a finger. Toji was relying on their catty caste system to ultimately drive you into his arms, as the only person you could rely on.

Toji couldn’t have one of them ruin that. 

He needed to know more about this ‘friend’ of yours. 

How well have you gotten to know each other? 

And in what ways?

The fact that this development happened right under his watchful eye, without him knowing the depth of it, had Toji cross to say the least.

Thankfully, your isolation had you starved for an attentive ear, so you were eager to spill your guts about your new friend to him. 

And as the good future husband he’d be to you, Toji was sure to listen now as he would in the future—or at least appear like he was most of the time.

“She’s new like me! Well, not new I suppose, but back for a stay here with her fiancé until things calm down due to all the commotion happening overseas now.”

So that woman did intend to leave. 

Good. 

The sooner the better so Toji’s own hand wouldn’t have to be forced and your little ‘friend’ could be spared. 

Toji couldn’t have anything or anyone coming in between the two of you—no matter the consequences from who they were.

“She doesn’t have any kids so I’ve been giving her tips and sharing how I dealt with Yuji this past year. She always seems to be busy though, so we haven’t really had the chance to really do anything—but she calls me often.”

Toji’s teeth clenched. 

They dared to make phone contact even?

And bad girl—you’d been so eager to give this stranger, who had no respect for boundaries, your number but you hesitated with him?

What did Toji need to do to show you he was the only one with your best interests in mind?

Toji was the only one you should have confided in and the only one you should trust.

“Heh, well isn’t that nice, ma.”

Toji would have to figure out how to deal with the problem of your new friend at a later time. He didn’t want to spend the fleeting moments he had remaining with you brooding, as it was sure to soon show on his face and sour the mood.

Pivoting the subject back to just the two of you, Toji inquired about the baked goods he’s still owed. He could tell you’d forgotten already, but he wasn’t going to pass up the opportunity he had to taste your cooking. 

It would keep him sated long enough until he could actually taste you.

“Ya know, I usually don’t like sweets though.”

Toji told you when you asked his favorite dessert and you were genuinely determined you could bake him something he’d like.

“Hmm, you know I can make a mean fudge brownie! I make them with semi-sweet chocolate too. Plus, since I moved here I also cut some sugar and added matcha to the recipe, so they wouldn’t be too sweet. they are so gooey they melt in your mouth.”

“Heh, yeah—I bet you would too, ma.”

This time, you didn’t suppress your amused cackle as you shook your head and pushed your cart forward, still overall ignoring his persistent flirtations even if you were growing more comfortable with them.

Toji sensed the playful personality you’d kept tightly wrapped under all those layers from being with Sukuna, whose cruel sense of humor would only serve to crush yours. 

Toji couldn’t wait to be the one to fully draw it back out of you.

“Ugh—boy, you play too much, Fushiguro!”

Toji chuckled, pushing his cart along after yours—he could tell your cheeks were still burning though. 

“—Toji, ma.”

When you both finally reached the register, Toji checked out first, slyly sliding his card to cover your groceries as well.

You were completely unaware though, having left your cart with him in line while you rushed Yuji to the bathroom.

Yuji, being the growing boy that he was, had devoured his rice snacks too quickly and promptly spat them up all over himself.

Feeling smug in his chivalry, Toji anticipated seeing an even sweeter smile when you returned to find your groceries already paid for.

Yet, he’d seemingly made another miscalculation with you. 

As when you returned to see your groceries bagged and paid for, you kept Yuji in your arms as you placed your bags of groceries in the stroller itself, storming out without a word leaving behind a dumbfounded Toji.

Toji was more than puzzled as you seemed furious at the fact Toji had done what he deemed to be ‘a-nice-thing-any-woman- would-want’. 

The fuck happend?!

Shifting Megumi and own bag in his arms, Toji swiftly pursued you. 

“Oy, mamas!”

You ignored him but Toji wouldn’t give up on you easily, or at all truthfully. 

You didn’t realize that yet but Toji figured you must have gathered he was bullheaded enough to keep following you until you acknowledged him once you abruptly stopped and whipped around to face him.

“What, no ‘thank you’ f’er me, ma?”

Toji watched your nostrils flare as you angrily snapped at him.

“Thank you?!” 

God, you were beautiful—even pissed off. 

Toji knows he should be more focused on what you were saying in the moment, as you heatedly  gave him a piece of your mind. However, Toji zoned out momentarily, unable to quiet his internal thoughts that screamed to him how pretty you were with your brow furrowed and cheeks puffed in indignation. 

“... and furthermore you think you can just buy me, is that it?! That just because I have to rely on Sukuna and accept living in a building full of side hoes to give Yuji a comfortable life that I’ll just giggle and go along with anything like the rest of those bitches?!”

Shit. 

You were actually pissed. 

Ah fuck. 

Toji had greatly underestimated your self-worth. Once again, you proved him wrong—and once more, that pleased him. It further highlighted how you were in fact a pearl among The Nursery pigs.

“Uh, Fuck mamas, er–I-I…no–”

Yet you proved to be such a wildcard that you had Toji of all people stuttering as he scrambled to find the right words to appease you.

“—then what?! Say something!”

Toji had to think fast. 

He could see how it looked bad now, but in a rare form from his usual nature, Toji’s intentions had been honest. Toji just really wanted to show you he had the means and could take care of you—not to buy you. 

Nonetheless, Toji really only had himself to blame as he’s sure you’ve heard of his far less than pious reputation. 

Ostracized or not, the bougie women of The Nursery were terrible gossips and he was sure you’d overheard plenty less than savory information about him. 

Of course, with all things considered, you’d assume the worst of him.  

But Toji had never even bothered to learn any of those bitches names, much less buy them anything—they would give him gifts.

In this situation though, to quell your anger and regain your favor, Toji devised a quick lie, hoping it would smooth things over.

“Tch,” he began, scratching the back of his head and awkwardly looking away from you.

He had to be sure to sell it. 

“No, it’s just ah, the guy—er, the teller. He assumed we were together.” 

Toji shifted his stance, readjusting a drowsy Megumi in his arms.

“So, you told him we were…?” 

You raised a brow, huffing but you didn’t seem as angry as before. Toji saw your eyes soften a bit, distracted by a cute lil yawn from Megumi who sleepily burrowed his face deeper into his shoulder.

Good kid, lookin out for y’er old man, aye Gumi?

Seeing how Megumi was disarming you, Toji knew this was his chance at redemption. Like a gentle giant, Toji’s large hand dwarfed his son’s small head with affection pats—an action he had picked up from observing you.

“Not exactly—but I supposed it looked that way, ma. What with the kids n’ya leaving all y’er shit with me n’all. Easier to just pay then explain.”

Toji continued before you could say anything, seeing as you didn’t look quite convinced.

“Trust me, from all of what you told me today, I know ya can take care of y’erself mamas… even if you are with that asshole.”

You regarded Toji with a scrutinizing gaze for all of a minute, yet that minute felt like hours to him. 

He couldn’t remember feeling this uneasy ever—and being in the Yakuza put him in several situations in the past he thought he wouldn’t make it out of. 

“Fine,” you resigned with a sigh, “It’s whatever then.” 

Seeing that you had set aside the words you originally intended to scold him with, Toji felt that this was the best possible outcome he could have hoped for.

Well shit, bullet dodged.

“Uh yeah, well…I’ll see you around then Fushiguro—”

Toji couldn’t just let you leave like this, on uneasy terms with your frustration still evident.

“—Wait ma!”

And even more so as Toji stopped you once again.

“Look…I ain’t too big to admit I fucked up, mamas. Let me make it up to ya, yeah? Give ya a ride back so ya don’t hafta walk back in this heat?”

Toji knew you wanted to reject his offer out of pride, but he was serious now—there was no fuckin’ way he was gonna let you walk back. 

Your load of groceries was way more than your usual trips, and on top of carrying Yuji, a sizable boy for his age, your purse and pushing the stroller would turn a 15 minute walk into a 25 minute one easily. 

The scorching summer sun perched high at its peak at this time of day and the thick, near suffocating, humidity could easily turn to heat exhaustion—especially for a young toddler.

He knew you knew that too.

You’d have to accept, per Toji’s calculations.

And you did.

“Okay, why not...” 

Yet the reluctance was clear in your voice. 

The ride back began uneventfully, yet the calm atmosphere inside the car was tinged with awkwardness. 

Megumi was snoozing in his car seat, while Yuji sat on your lap in the passenger seat. 

Despite the lingering tension, Toji could see the relief on your face. The transition from the sweltering heat to the cool comfort of his air-conditioned Mercedes had clearly brought you much-needed respite.

The domesticality of it all was something Toji didn’t realize he would miss as much as he did, and it pissed him off that it was something Sukuna of all people had and took for granted. 

However, when Toji glanced over at you, he tightened his grip on the wheel with both hands.

Your actions were purely innocent as you entertained Yuji, bouncing him on your knees. However, the movement caused your sundress to lift and bunch damn near to your hips. 

Toji swore he could feel the steering wheel crack under his grip as he fought the urge to slide a hand onto your thigh, or at minimum over his soon-to-be-bricked-up cock. 

Fuck. Get it together. 

But there was nothing Toji could have done to stop his dissociative daydreams, which had grown increasingly vivid since laying eyes on you, from consuming him. 

The sleek hardness of the leather steering wheel morphed to be malleable like the inner flesh of your thighs. Toji gripped the wheel tighter, which only made the visualization of how soft your skin would be in contrast to the texture of his calloused hand more apparent. The same hand which would so graciously sink into the warm plush of your skin with reassuring squeezes. 

Finally, Toji would also get his answer as to whether or not you had been wearing panties. Toji’s wandering hand would only need to travel up the tiniest bit higher to press his knuckles right against your core.

And when it came down to it, whether you had them on or not mattered little to Toji—regardless of the result, he still intended to bully his thick middle knuckle directly into your clit. 

Toji would take satisfaction in keeping his main attention on the road as he engaged you in casual conversation—all the while drawing slow absentminded circles around your bud. He would only pause if he felt the lil’ thing swell up enough—to the point where the soft clicking sounds from your slick could be heard if there wasn’t music playing. 

He’d edge you with subtle, yet incessant, pleasure all the way home. Seeing just how much of his teasing your messy cunt could handle.

Toji's mind was stuck so badly in-between your thighs that he’d actually been caught off guard when you finally broke the silence, eagerly asking about his playlist as “How Do U Want It” pumped through the car speakers. 

And that's how Toji managed to worm his way back into your good graces.

You seemed genuinely surprised to discover he was also a fan of ’90s hip-hop when he told you he was. 

Of course, being a fan of ’90s hip-hop wasn’t a lie—but he had heard this particular song playing from your apartment before, so he made sure to add it to a playlist for whenever he’d be able to get you into his car. 

Much to Toji’s enjoyment, before long you were laughing again as he attempted—very, very poorly—to rap along to some of the lyrics in English. 

Pleased to have won you back over, Toji purposely missed at least two turns just to keep you in his car a bit longer.

If the day had ended there, he would have considered it a win. 

But, of course, with his luck, things would prove to be anything but victorious.

Naturally, once you both returned, Toji carried your bags upstairs. However, that didn’t stop him from playfully teasing you.

Toji joked that—‘Miss Independent didn’t want him paying for her groceries, but she sure as hell didn’t mind him carrying them’—and was rewarded again with the soft snorts of your laughter.

It’s not like you didn’t have your hands full though, cradling both Megumi and Yuji, who were now fast asleep—one on each of your shoulders.

It was…cute.

Fuck, when even was the last time Toji even thought something was cute? 

You were cute though, especially with the kids. 

That he didn’t mind admitting. 

Toji regretted that he didn't snap a picture of the moment. He knew it would likely be over soon.

Heh, maybe it didn’t have to be though.

With both boys asleep in your arms, Toji considered the likelihood of coaxing you to invite him in. You’d surely need help carrying both Yuji and your bags inside—but he didn’t want to push his luck, especially after he had already majorly fucked things up with you once today.

Although, Toji realized you wouldn’t need any convincing when you looked at him with a kind smile that reached all the way into your bright eyes. That was all the encouragement he needed to step across the threshold, technically uninvited, as he held the door open for you.

Toji would have entered too, had the energy not immediately shifted. 

“—and just what the fuck is this?”

Motherfucker.

Down the hallway, Sukuna had since stepped out of the elevator with his right hand, Uraume, close behind. Sukuna appeared already agitated, barking rushed orders over the phone. 

But Sukuna abruptly ended the call the moment he saw Toji about to enter the condo with you. And as if he owned the entire building himself, Sukuna exuded obnoxious dominance in every stride as he approached. 

Toji may have outranked him but Sukuna rivaled Toji in both size and presence, sauntering over to loom behind you with an unmistakable air of possessiveness.

Tch, Sukuna shouldn’t even be here. 

Toji had miscalculated—a rare miscalculation, but a big one nonetheless—what he gets, he supposed, for trusting a less than meticulous intel source. 

According to his, now incorrect intel, Sukuna was supposed to be in Shinjuku at headquarters. The fact that he was here, interfering with his time he had so meticulously planned with you, infuriated Toji. 

Shit—he hadn’t wanted Sukuna to see you two together just yet.

Despite Toji being unable to hide his disdain, he offered a respectful nod to Sukuna, as was customary between fellow upper-ranked yakuza. 

Sukuna returned the gesture in-kind, along with a smug grin that had plastered itself across his face.

Tension saturated the air and Toji noticed that your once-gentle smiles had faded, replaced by wary glances exchanged between him and Sukuna. 

Toji’s hand causally brushed yours as you carefully handed Megumi back to him before you faced Sukuna.

He noticed you running the spot on your hand where your skin had touched.

Did you also feel the electricity between the two of you burn your skin?

Toji had.

“If I knew you were coming, you could have picked me up from the store, Ryo! Then I wouldn’t have had to be a bother to Fushiguro...”

You could never be a bother to Toji.

Looking you over, Toji scrutinized your every movement. He knew you were merely trying to shift focus and keep the peace—but to do it for him? 

After everything today, and how he unintentionally put his foot in his mouth with his actions?

Were—were you falling for him, already?

The slightly strained smile on your face still looked sweet enough, and Toji might have mistaken it for genuine—if not for the real warmth you’d shown him just moments before Sukuna’s arrival. 

You really had saved your smiles just for him, isn’t that right mama?

Toji’s heart beats wildly at the thought, however his good temperaments were greatly diminished as he noted how the light in your eyes dimmed.

Seeing you shrink yourself to answer to Sukuna, no matter how insignificant—pissed him off.

Well, at least thanks to him, you wouldn’t have to suffer Sukuna much longer.

As Toji had expected, Sukuna didn’t try to suppress his asshole-like nature, even towards you. Your attempted olive branch had been rebuffed by the heavy hand on your shoulder. It was evident Sukuna was unconcerned with your excuses as he focused solely on Toji.

“Ah Fushiguro, I see you’ve met my son and his mother.”

Even though Sukuna had failed to give you a title, the intent behind his words and demeanor was unmistakable: 

Sukuna owned you.

So that's how it is, eh? 

Toji couldn’t say he was surprised.

Although his possessive nature wasn't driven by affection for you, Sukuna simply never liked to share his toys.

Sukuna must have thought you were just another plaything for Toji, well aware of what Toji got up to typically at The Nursery, 

Eh, and were you any other woman, Sukuna would have been right. 

But you were never toy to Toji, he wanted much more than just to fuck you, even before he realized it himself. 

Toji would be lying if he said that he wasn’t looking forward to that too though. 

“Heh, we’ve already had our introductions before, isn’t that right…?” 

Toji was pleased by the flushed, wide-eyed expression on your face when he dared to address you by your first name—just as he was pleased that Sukuna’s smirk faltered into a scowl at Toji’s bold familiarity with you.

Toji mainly did it to piss Sukuna off. However seeing you flustered, knowing he could have an effect on you even in front of Sukuna, had been a much sweeter treat. 

“Oh? Then she must know not to pay heed to old roosters who are now forced to spend more time in the hen house than running the farm these days. Although, a rooster who cannot crow effectively is of little use anywhere else, I suppose.”

Toji’s expression held firm onto the casual smugness he wore, but inside he was boiling. 

Toji knew exactly what Sukuna was referring to.

Since his late wife passed, Toji had been only sent for specialized jobs that required his immense powerhouse abilities. Although he could easily air out a room of 20 men, Toji was considered to be more of a loose cannon than ever before.

Simply not caring—Toji took his anger out on more than just his targeted kills with no second thoughts given to the collateral damage of the environment he was in nor the civilian casualties around. Thus Toji made the damage control messier and harder on the organization in cases where more precision was needed. 

Some would have called that a liability and had him dealt with, yet the bigger liability still would be trying to ‘deal with’ Toji in the first place. 

Many had tried over the years for one reason or another—and it had been a guaranteed death sentence every time too. 

Regardless, Toji had remained dog loyal to the organization though, with little care for power or status, even though it came to him anyway. 

As long as he was paid, Toji had been content—and in turn, so had the organization. 

This resulted in Toji mostly being able to do as he pleased, even when he went a little rogue at times. 

“Rooster, eh—”

Toji knew Sukuna’s condescending smug attitude stemmed from the special privileges he’d been given to sit in on the executive meetings to solve the current unrest of having to do with whatever old fuck of an executive had gotten himself offed.

Regardless, it could still be seen as a loss of status not being in those meetings.

More importantly—Toji’s rogue behaviors could easily be manipulated into a target on his back should Sukuna assert he’d been a part of the internal treason.

Toji knew he had to tread cautiously with Sukuna, but Toji still did not feel threatened in the least.

“—I’d like to think of myself here as more of a fox though, it suits me better don’t ya think?” 

Toji’s gaze had briefly met your own, and you quickly turned away, his grin growing even wider.

But then again, if Sukuna wanted to think Toji was down and out—Toji would let him. 

It would work to Toji’s advantage in the long run with securing you as his anyway. 

Toji wasn’t worried as he had nothing to do with that old geezer getting wacked and he was glad they’d left him out of it.

Besides, Sukuna being brought into the inner circle could have just as easily been a way to keep a closer watch on him. After all, Sukuna wasn’t an executive—and while Toji was, his role was to eliminate threats, not uncover them. It made more sense for Toji to stay away than for Sukuna to be involved at all.

All which was a net win for Toji, as he found himself with more opportunities to spend time with you, while the organization conveniently kept Sukuna occupied.

With a swift, smooth motion, Toji bent down to retrieve the stray apple that had rolled from your grocery bag. He polished it against his suit jacket before handing it back to you with a sly smile.

“Ya know, I am just next door lil’ hen. This ol’fox is still capable of being a good neighbor. I’ll always have plenty of sugar for you too, should you ever find yourself in need…”

Toji turns to Sukuna.

“...Especially since Sukuna has his hands full on the upper levels of the farm these days, eh? S’a wonder at all how ya manage to visit the hens on this floor too.”

Toji watched with amusement as your eyes widened at the blatant innuendos given right in front of Sukuna, who merely was left growling as his cell audibly and persistently vibrated.

Sukuna deemed the call more important than the coded banter with Toji, as he all but dragged you and Yuji into the condo—leaving the groceries for Uraume to bring in.

Although he had won the battle of the day, Toji regretted his actions later that evening when he inevitably lost the war.

Sukuna made sure to let it be known Toji lost too, as Sukuna had fucked you against the adjoining wall of the master bedroom so hard the entire wall shook.

Your pained yet pleasure-filled moans seeped through the thick insulation of the walls.

Using you like you were just one of his toys, Sukuna was quite literally pounding the point home that you belonged to him with every forceful quake.

Point taken, but what angered Toji more was Sukuna was being too rough with you.

Toji could have sworn he heard you plead for Sukuna to slow down and the irony of his concern was not lost on Toji. 

Toji was never known for being a particularly gentle lover himself, but your body had been through enough—you’re a mother now. 

You deserved better than the careless treatment of some cheap plastic fuck doll. 

Nevertheless, despite the roughness, it was clear from the diluted moans through the insulation—you had liked it.

Sukuna was still making you cum. 

And oh god, did Toji ever want to prove to your precious pussy that his thick inches would fuck her even harder if that’s what she asked of him.

Toji had to repress a frustrated groan when he realized he was painfully hard. 

Your damped cries had Toji palming himself for relief before he even knew what he was doing.

Yet for all the perverse arousal he felt, Toji did feel some semblance of guilt. 

His taunting of Sukuna ensured that this punishment was a lesson for the both of you.

But—Fuck. 

Toji couldn’t deny his sadistic side.

He was a killer after all. 

Even the distressed tremor of your euphoric moans sounded absolutely heavenly to him, and it wasn’t long before Toji fumbled with his own belt to drag out his heavily leaking cock. 

Thick humid breaths left Toji as he hissed from having thumbed off the viscous pre-gathering on his redden tip. 

Toji slowly spread it down his pulsing length, shuddering. 

His frustrations at not being the one touching you—not being the one making you shiver and moan, are only rivaled by his frustration of this being the first time he’s had any real fire in his loins since he’s met you.

The fierce desire to cum was overtaking his more rational brain or self-control as he’d hadn’t been this hard in weeks, even when he’d rub one out from watching old security footage of you.

Wanting any semblance of contact, Toji placed his free hand on the wall—on the exact spot he imagined Sukuna had your cheek pressed against. 

With closed eyes, Toji pictured himself cupping your face, thumb smoothing away any stray hairs or tears while he is the one thrusting into you, filling you.

His large hand encompassed his length while he thrusted into his rough palm, faster now that the speed of the thumping had increased—signaling Sukuna was close to finishing you.

Swallowing a frustrated roar, your muted cries for Sukuna through the wall brought Toji out of his fantasies and back to the harsh reality that Sukuna was the one balls deep in your tight milf pussy—while he was only in his own hand.

Nevertheless, Toji was determined to cum and even more so, determined to soon be the one making you scream in pleasure. 

If you were this loud now—you’d be much louder on his cock. 

Toji leaned in even closer, resting his head on his forearm against the wall, the wall that still shuddered with the force of Sukuna ruthlessly rearranging your guts. 

Forcing himself to dissociate once more, so he could finish—Toji squeezed his eyes shut tightly as he bit his lip to the point of drawing blood. In the daydream, in Toji’s mind, it wasn’t the coarse skin of his palm that stroked his cock but the silky, wet heat of your cozy lil’ cunt. 

Toji convinced himself that the sloshing noises that rang throughout his bedroom were from him stretching your pussy to his shape as his fat tip slammed against your cervix— and not from the embarrassing amount of pearlescent fluid spilling over his hand. 

He hadn’t even cum yet—a testament to how backed up he truly was. 

Toji should have been ashamed at the way his girth had pulsed in his palm, but he was so close, and so determined to finish with you, there was no room for ego.

Picking up speed to nearly the point of chafing, Toji jerked his cock feverishly. Toji came when he heard the loudest moan yet vibrate through the wall, and the banging had ceased with a final jarring shake. 

Rolling back his eyes, Toji released his load all over the wall of his master bedroom, finally sated. Toji had allowed himself to release a strangled groan of relief, once he believed you both were no longer near the wall.

Panting and half-delirious with euphoric release, Toji’s eyes followed the trail of his thick cum splatter slowly trickling down the wall as his once engorged cock deflated in his hand. 

With a curled lip and narrowed-in eyes, the white fluid turns red in his mind’s eye. 

A dark chuckle escaped his lips and Toji fantasized what it would be like to put a slug right between Sukuna’s eyes. Toji’s large load pooled onto the floor in a similar fashion to how Sukuna’s brains would leak, spilling out as it also formed a similarly morbid pool of fluids.

Yet even despite his more ruthless inclinations, upon inhaling a deep breath, Toji felt an unfamiliar zen wash over him.

Killing was just business to Toji, and he couldn’t recall the last time the thought of offing someone had brought him this much pleasure or any semblance of peace.

Yet the fact revealed itself to him then, in that moment—the truth that he’d kill everyone in this goddamn organization for you if that's what it took.

Toji knew Sukuna wasn’t one of those cowardly fucks who would just roll over while someone moved in on his woman either, so Toji would likely be forced to kill him should Sukuna ever find out his true plans for you. 

Toji sighs reluctantly—it was just a mere fantasy.

Not that he gave two fucks what would happen to Sukuna, but killing him would only fan the flames and might even cause an all-out internal war within the organization. 

A war that as the top assassin, he’d be expected to quell with force—for god knows how long.

Ultimately, that would mean a loss for Toji too.

The more involved with the organization he was, the less time he’d get with you.

Brute force was never the ideal way to deal with someone like Sukuna, and it would be better for everyone if you seemingly left him of your own accord. 

But what other choice did he have? 

He’d do what it took to get you at the end of the day.

And while these complications may have deterred a younger Toji, you, as well as the challenge itself, breathed new life into his aging bones.

That life extended into all areas of his current one. Even the usually reserved Megumi had become less quiet and more responsive to Toji with his changed demeanor and increased presence around The Nursery.

You didn’t even know how much you were fixing his life even if you were only on the outskirts of it now. 

You had made him better—so in turn, he would give you better.

Toji had no real interests, hobbies, nor friends. 

Your moving-in had been the most exciting thing that had happened to him since she had been alive and Toji had lived the last year of his life on autopilot—but no more. 

Now that he had something, well, someone that made him feel energized once again. 

⟡

The familiar trill of a cell phone—one of the many burners he used for his yakuza dealings—pulls Toji out of his thoughts once again.

His lip curls in annoyance at the person on the line.

This is why Toji likes working alone. 

Others were not only liabilities, but they were rarely ever self-sufficient. 

Always wanting to ‘check-in’ and ‘confirm the plan’, rather than just taking the damn action themselves like they were supposed to. 

But alas, the task of getting rid of Sukuna was something Toji knew he couldn’t do alone, he needed the intel source, even if they were unreliable at best. 

Toji answers the call, but keeps it brief with his clipped replies.

By the time it ended, he was already scoffing, indifferent to the voice still speaking on the other end as he cut the call short and hung up as soon as he got the info he needed. 

Shoving the phone into his back pocket, Toji sparks another cigarette.

His 'partner' had so kindly reminded him of the loose ends he still needed to tie up.

But that could wait. 

For now, Toji remained where he was, stationed on his balcony—ready to stay out here all night for the small chance you may need him.

©𝐛𝐥𝐤𝐤𝐢𝐳𝐳𝐚𝐭 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒. 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 𝐨𝐫 𝐠𝐟𝐱, 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞.

⟢ end credits: please comment, like and reblog and lmk what you think! I'd really appreciate the feedback as this fic has been my baby working on it.

i will likely end up completing another work while i work on episode 3 as my adhd ass usually needs to break it up in order not to get writers block and unlike e2 i had only done the outline so far, so if i post something else in the meantime just know i'm still working on episode 3!

[gossippool]

hi welcome back to leanne rewatches deadpool & wolverine and goes insane about every single detail in this movie. in this edition: how logan's clothes reflect the trajectory of his character

1. the suit—inside

so we start off with the scene in the bar where logan appears to be wearing what we're used to seeing him wear. flannels, leather jackets. his outfit and even the setting is not at all unfamiliar for him. but, as we later find out, he was wearing the suit underneath all those layers the whole time.

during his talk with laura, he reveals that he wears the suit to remember those he'd lost, and as a reminder of what he'd done. he's had the suit on permanently for god knows how long, hidden under his clothes. at this point he bears the suit like a cross, suffering in silence under the guise of normalcy, yet sacrificing what's left of his identity by reducing himself to what the suit represents; by taking all the jabs and nasty looks people throw at him that he thinks he's too deserving of to combat.

2. the suit—outside

after wade pulls him out, he has the suit on display for quite a while. on one hand, it shows the fight that's in him now as a contrast to his passivity in his own world. on the other hand, it's also a sort of vulnerability: what that suit stands for and by extension what he himself is is now laid bare to the world. out in the open for people to question. maybe that fight that's in him now stems precisely from this vulnerability.

this vulnerability is both good and bad for him: it causes him to lash out at the questions from wade that he's not ready to answer. it also leads him to open up to laura and finally speak about what happened—who knows if he's ever said any of it out loud before. fun! even with just the suit, we're already seeing some development.

and THIS is where it gets interesting.

3. the white shirt—his mind

the first time we truly see him without the suit is when cassandra nova looks into his mind. i've been going back and forth on whether this is logan's own manifestation of himself or if it's cassandra's, and i still don't know. i think the distinction does matter, but in the end what it conveys is the same.

firstly, another layer of vulnerability again. he's already on his knees for cassandra, submissive—now in his mind he's also stripped as bare as he can be (i think we all know white shirts can sometimes leave little to the imagination). cassandra looks at him and says "you're hiding ... from all the ones you let down." how interesting is that?? if we go all the way back to the first scene, he hides his suit under normal clothes. and he hides this version of him in his mind even further underneath all of that.

secondly and as an extension of that point, white symbolises purity. cleanliness. even a promise of new beginnings. let's tackle this from the two possible perspectives.

if this is logan's manifestation of himself, it would be so intriguing that this is how he appears. maybe it means that despite it all, there's some good in him. maybe it means that deep, deep down, past all the shame and the guilt and the grief, there's still a part of his mind where he can just be.

on the other hand, the white could also symbolise a second chance—like i said, a promise of new beginnings. i made a post about this scene here, but the basic point is that cassandra is offering him something that no one else may ever be able to offer him. a chance to fully be himself, to silence the voices. the white is such a stunning visual representation of what she is saying logan could be if he stays with her. which makes it even more poignant that he doesn't.

4. the time ripper

after this scene, he's in the suit again, necessarily. but then! BUT THEN!!!!! the time ripper!!! y'all need to understand the significance of this scene in all its nuances FR! here you can look at his abs again:

but the thing is we know by now what the suit represents. all his failures, all his guilt, his inability to let go of his past. it represents him. isn't it just so fitting that it's at this point where he saves the fucking world that the suit breaks away. it breaks away from him. he's free. this not the same as him just taking it off, because with it breaking into pieces he literally cannot wear it anymore. this is not just a hugh jackman body appreciation, this is logan finally moving on. this is him realising that he is not a failure, that he is not his failures, that he has something else to live for.

5. him

and oh my god, we finally make it to the extremely satisfying ending. after all of that, we finally come full circle. he's in his normal clothes again, the wife beater and the flannel, except this time without anything underneath. he's no longer defined by that one incident, defined by his mistakes and the people he let down. he is just him.