#thor this thor that THATS MY BABY SHUT UP
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334iwatchshit · 1 month ago
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everytime someone makes up their mind on a character based on how they are portrayed in the mcu alone an angel loses its wings
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themculibrary · 1 year ago
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Shameless Smut Masterlist
Add It Up (ao3) - leftennant darcy/loki, jane/thor, pepper/tony E, 125k
Summary: Loki and Darcy have been dancing around each other ever since they were paired up as a team at S.H.I.E.L.D. by Nick Fury. When they both end up up in his apartment after saving the world, things finally hit the boiling point.
Bang My Boyfriend (ao3) - OhCaptainMyCaptain steve/bucky, steve/everyone E, 20k
Summary: Bucky arranges to fulfill one of Steve's darkest fantasies: getting gangbanged by all of the Avengers.
But If You're Touching, I'll Make It Better (ao3) - OhCaptainMyCaptain bucky/steve/tony E, 19k
Summary: “What about Capsicle?” Tony asks.
Barnes’s smirk grows. “What about him?”
Tony gives him a flat look and puts his hands on his hips. “Well, not that it’s not a pleasant surprise to see Robocop offering himself to me like some strippergram – but I really don’t feel like getting the smackdown from your boyfriend once he’d find out.”
The entire time he’s talking, Barnes is raising his eyebrows and looking at him with an over exaggerated interest; quirking his mouth as if to say, 'Oh, really, do tell me more, that’s so interesting.' There’s a split second after the last word is out when Tony watches grey eyes flicker off of him to just behind Tony, and he doesn’t even get the chance to wonder what the fuck he’s looking at--
When he hears his door shut and suddenly Rogers’s voice is right behind his left ear.
“Who says I wouldn’t like it?” the Captain murmurs, and Tony freezes.
Forms of Love (ao3) - bear_bell bucky/tony E, 33k
Summary: Months after the Avengers' dispute in Germany, the team returns to the US and moves back into the tower. As always, everyone pretends that nothing happened. Tony is just fine with this. He's used to pretending, and he'll be damned if he lets any of them see him flinch.
Tony's the bad guy, after all. He's used to it. He's fine with it. He's good at it.
Only now, there's something far worse loitering around the tower - The Winter Soldier. No one notices the guy at first, but when they do, Tony figures that he should have the soldier's back.
Birds of a feather should flock together, and the bad guys should start a book club.
Fucking Tony Stark (ao3) - ohstonymystony tony/everyone E, 4k
Summary: Loki gives Tony a pussy and the avengers fuck it. Thats it.
Got Me Going Crazy (ao3) - orphan_account steve/bucky E, 3k
Summary: “Do you have any idea what you do to me, Stevie?” Bucky growled, his voice deep and husky, straddling Steve’s hips, pushing him down onto the sofa, pinning his arms above his head.
“Bucky, what is – oh,” Steve frowned, then, thankful that this was Bucky, not a lapse into the Winter Soldier, and he smiled cheekily, “no.”
“God, baby doll,” Bucky growled in Steve’s ear, rolling his hips against Steve’s, so that he could feel just how hard he was for him, “you’re so perfect, fuck, gettin’ me all hot and bothered. Do you even know what you’re doin’ half the time?”
Steve arched his back instinctively and melted in Bucky’s touch, in his voice, in the lips that were mouthing along his jaw, nipping lightly at firm skin, making him whine, before, “I’m not doin’ anythin’.”
Bucky tightened his grip on Steve’s wrists above his head, rolling his hips again, grinding down on the blond, both of them straining in the restrictions of their clothes, “oh, yeah, then what’s caused this?”
Basically, the one in which Steve is an oblivious sweetheart and Bucky doesn't know how to deal with that.
Hate doesn't even describe it (ao3) - elcapitan_rogers steve/natasha E, 153k
Summary: Steve hated Natasha. Natasha hated Steve. Everything was fine until their parents decided to fuck shit up for them...
Legs As White as Sugar, Candy on the Window Sill (ao3) - OhCaptainMyCaptain steve/bucky E, 15k
Summary: Steve's a fucking little tease. The worst part is he knows it.
‘Cause Steve’s still got those fucking black-rimmed glasses on, but the beanie’s gone and his hair is perfectly styled like one of those rich kids whose parents could afford to send them to prep school. Bucky’s zipper scrapes against his sudden and uncontrollable erection when Steve walks onto the stage wearing a motherfucking schoolboy uniform – white button-up tee shirt and tie and fucking crest and everything.
Long Distance (ao3) - NotEvenCloseToStraight bucky/steve/tony E, 44k
Summary: At the end of a bad day, Tony gets drunk and texts Rhodey all his woes. Except he typed the wrong number, and has been texting someone named Steve– who is blond, 28, teaches art and somehow charmed by Tonys drunk rambles. One conversation turns into another, and soon they are texting and talking and flirting every day for weeks until Tony finally takes a chance and asks Steve to meet in person. Steve replies that he and his boyfriend Bucky would be thrilled to meet. Devastated, and feeling betrayed, Tony stops talking to Steve all together, and their budding relationship comes to a screeching halt. But Bucky has been eavesdropping on their conversations and texts and is halfway in love with Tony too, so he takes it upon himself to fix the rift between Steve and Tony. Tony isn’t sure about it at first, but after some cute videos, sexy selfies, several date nights, Tony starts to think that the three of them may actually work. Can Bucky and Steve convince Tony there is enough room in their bed and their arms for each other AND him? Will this Long Distance texting and phone call relationship ever make it into the same zip code?
Making A Splash! (ao3) - roe87 steve/bucky E, 63k
Summary: When Steve Rogers was eleven years old, he fell from a boat into deep ocean water. What saved him was another boy in the water; he saved Steve with a kiss.
Steve couldn't even be sure the boy was real, because he disappeared right after Steve's rescue, leaving Steve to pursue a meandering life on land, until he finally settled back at the beach as a county lifeguard.
When Steve falls into deep water again as an adult, his mysterious guardian from the water reappears, and this time he's sticking around.
Moving Home (ao3) - loves_buckybarnes layla el-faouly/steven/marc E, 38k
Summary: Layla is missing living in Cairo so she asks Steven and Marc if they want to move to Cairo, her father left her the house in her name, the house she grew up in, so they decide to go visit and see if they want to live there.
Omega Interrupted (ao3) - pandafish steve/bucky E, 80k
Summary: Bucky isn't a normal omega. He hasn't hit his first proper heat yet, but still it feels like he's in an almost constant state of heat. His sexual dysfunction causes the omega boarding school where he goes to send him to a clinic meant to deal with this stuff - a massive brick mansion in the middle of the beautiful woods. When Dr Steve Rogers, expert in omega medicine, sees Bucky however he's perplexed. He's never seen an omega with this particular problem before, especially not in someone so young.
So Steve decides to take him in, and since he doesn't quite know how to treat him, he just needs to experiment. And soon Bucky finds himself spending his days strapped to a chair or bench being subjected to all kinds of pleasurable machines and medical treatments by a very handsome alpha doctor...
Perfect Body (ao3) - IronShield steve/tony E, 12k
Summary: Steve Rogers is struggling with his sexual desires, he doesn't know if he should share them with anyone. One day, out of curiosity he reads some SteveXTony fanfiction and Tony wonders if the fanfic matches up the the real deal. The first chapter sets it up, chapter 2 and on will contain all the smut!
Salt, Sweat, Sugar (ao3) - RockSaltAndRoll steve/bucky E, 12k
Summary: Bucky has worked for the Adult Entertainment Industry for a couple of years now while he sees himself through college. The money is good, the people are great and the sex is awesome - altogether it’s great fun. It gets better the day he gets paired up with new guy Steve Rogers who is just about the cutest barely legal twink that Bucky has ever seen in his life.
The Feelings I Hold Start Bleeding Out (ao3) - astudyinsolitude steve/bucky E, 9k
Summary: Steve's most closely guarded secret was that he was a submissive, and a hell of a strong one at that. A secret is, problematically, not conducive to super-serum enhanced needs for subspace.
An impending subdrop, a mission gone wrong, and an unlikely dom. Will he be enough to put Steve back together?
twisted round your finger (ao3) - kiss_me_cassie clint/natasha E, 1k
Summary: Two times Natasha gets the best of Clint and one time he does the same to her.
Unsuitable Breeding Stock (ao3) - sarahyellow steve/bucky E, 30k
Summary: “You fucking son of a bitch!” Steve is spitting out, furious. His face is going red, poor thing, and Bucky feels a twinge of guilt for having smiled. He knows he shouldn’t be encouraging it.
“Calm down, sweetheart,” he says. “It’s gonna be okay.”
Bucky brings his omega home.
You Have to Admire a Man with a Plan (ao3) - Imogen_Penn darcy/steve M, 5k
Summary: This is in response to a prompt from lagirl90 on tumblr: "Can I ask for some Darcy/Steve, where they meet and he's not pulling the shy guy. I'm dying to see him actually pursue her affections."
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the-firebird69 · 4 months ago
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Master Calendar of Trump Court Dates: Criminal and Civil Cases (justsecurity.org)
and weh ave a consensus this is terrible. and we use it yes. and we see trump is getting backinto court on several cases. postponed and he wiggles and treis to slide out. a sruprise is the maralogo case jack smith is qualified and brought the case and so what is a technicalty and the judge should be de throned she has given a wrong decision. and ps wants out anyways. the case can be brought by another ag or similar and it is moot. they said it he did not approve the case it was the doj. so jack smithwent to them and said it. i am not the case you approved it i called it toy our attention why can she dismiss it. they saied she cannot. and he said then why am i left to bring it back.. they said this. we dont have to allow it no nor support it but we do. so try. and he said ok but if the court does not suport it i will sue for the court to do so as the case was never mine and i am only a person bringing it. the court must do the job. and left. tey said this, you are not the court nor were acting for us. but we have your job. and he said what then are yoou up to and recomended they be dismissed. and they looked and agreed that is Maralago. it is up in the air, but, the judges are being kickedout this month. one out two to go. yes. soon too.
** we hear trump threatens our son we hit him now
---+tons to report but this article is convoluded. the other case georgia election interference and she the judge shall decide shortly ohow or if the suprerme courts ruling affects the case. and she plans to hang him. yes. we support that action. we also support removing the judge and it shall happen ok she plans to allow him out of it is a grandaughter and the show will urn real. turn real shortly. and it iscming down the pike this week.
_---dc election interference case he is indicted and the supreme court suggested no did so order many charges to be dropped out of the 37 they levied. and they will meet this month to decide to and continue the case. and it has beennoted he will protest. the judge in tis case will pick and chose no they will remove her. she is a turmster. and is found out to be one. and they will reveal it if they fighht it
janurary 6th i the above case. and yes they plan to remvoe the judge and fry trump and get him down a few pegs. he is a frigin faggot tell him to shut up and he wont and insists on talking
they plan to remove all his aides too from the juddgeeshps andby force if necessary and it is coming up. and it is the psuedo empire mac is running for veep.
today he sai d it dont letthat monkey knock me about and it is trump he meant. and they went to town on hishere. and tons of them fell. ate them up too and hits and says yout ou scum poond scum follows up to and they are at it heavy. see who he is the veep runner up with camilla harris and tons know it now.
he was fuming out of my hiare trump and the holes. and tons of times h e said it too him out of my hair and do this, take him to jail and or the mental hosptial..and our son says thats one reason why but no it is the macs below you trarrd harboror. and off me or your out....and he siad this iget it youcannot countermand me in public. fu i can and shall if your an idiot. and he said no go h om e baby and to mac..and he says they are there huh yyeh they are fn there. and so what, below you so what. and we dont care no do needed it. we ck and good call the fat boyos they need excersize are hyperciritcal of me and im poor fn sucks they need it and he did. they said no and then ok they look. and are there shortly.
we have some fun now this is it ok they will find them. and see what they are doing to them finally damn these are hard cases...and try to be dumb regardless lol
Thor Freya
Olympus
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star-ocean-peahen · 2 years ago
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Okay pulling from that last Riordan post I feel like the entire nature of Norse mythology in the Riordanverse could be so freaking cool????
And it's all based on Ragnarök.
You see, in the original mythos, there's a lot of importance placed on it. Specifically, the Aesir know it's coming, and do the classic bring-about-your-destiny-in-order-to-prevent-it thing.
But here's the thing: They do that by being dicks, and Loki is pretty wrapped up in it.
(obligatory the actual knowledge we have of these myths is fragmentary and there is no one correct interpretation because we do not know what the original one was and the general opinion at the time would have fluctuated anyway because thats how mythology works)
See, the Aesir get this prophecy, and in it Loki and his children are some pretty major players in the apocalypse and their own deaths. As in, two of his kids kill Thor and Odin. So in order to prevent this, they take Loki's children and imprison them for something they haven't actually done yet.
Additionally, the Aesir keep Loki himself around because he's really good at solving problems for them. Sure, most of those are caused by him, but he's still 'willing' to fix them all once threatened with Mjolnir to the face. (My favorite example of this is the birth of Sleipnir) (And I'm not saying Loki is an innocent little baby who's just getting pushed around by the Aesir he totally desires Chaos and Suffering but hes more of a trickster than a fully malicious figure—okay ill shut up now)
Anyway, the point is that the Aesir cause their own demise by being dicks.
Now, Ragnarök itself is really important in terms of what it's actually for. The impression we get from its descriptions is that it's supposed to do away with the gods and the world they've built for themselves and usher in a new, better world with newer gods and people who will hopefully do better this time. It's also established as the time when all bonds will break.
So. Not the worst apocalypse.
And it's exactly that cyclical nature that I think the Riordanverse could capitalize big-time.
Because the Percy Jackson books were all about breaking the cycle of abuse, right? Saying that just because the gods hurt us, doesn't give us the duty to tear them down against all reason? Saying that yes, the gods are flawed, and we are the ones to clean up their messes?
And in all the books, there's this undercurrent idea of the gods marching to their own downfall, and their children being the ones to rescue them from it.
You know who survives Ragnarök? The children of the Aesir.
Víðarr and Váli, Odin's sons, who avenged his death. Thor's twins Móði and Magni, who bear Mjolnir after their father dies. I see a pattern here.
Ragnarök is when the mistakes of the adults—of the parents—of the people in power—catch up to them. When they have to account for their cruelties. And their children—who inherit their symbols of power—inherit the world, to do a better job than they did.
Personally, I would say that by the time of this theoretical book, Ragnarök has happened multiple times. Each time the same scenarios are presented to different players, and those new gods and jotuns either change their roles or carry them out.
aaaaaaaaaaa im running out of brain space what im saying is that the original Norse myths actually carry the spirit of Riordan's signature themes better than the version we got in Magnus Chase
additions welcome!!
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raineydays411 · 4 years ago
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Kind of want this adventure to be over.
Bruce Banner x Daughter!reader
Summary: You have finally found your father...just not the way you expected. You sort out your feelings and have some realizations about people in your life.
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You felt sick. 
You couldn’t believe it. There he was. Your father, the man who has been missing for four years. 
He was here, being forced to slaughter people as a gladiator on a whole different planet. 
So many questions were running through your mind. How did he get here? Why hasn’t he escaped? How long has he been the Hulk?
You watch as Thor attempts to talk to him, but... it was almost like Hulk...like the attention. You watch in horror as Hulk charged at Thor. Throwing him into the wall. Both you and Loki looked at each other in concern, then glance at the Grandmaster who watched in glee.
You felt dizzy as you watched you father pummel his teammate. It was like he didn’t recognize him. He fought viscously. You cringed when you saw him slam Thor on the floor.
“YES!” Loki shouts, startling you and the Grandmaster, “THATS HOW IT FEELS!” 
You both stare at him, alarmed at the sudden outburst.
“I’m just a big fan of the sport...” He chuckles awkwardly.
He sits back down and looks at you. Concerned as you looked grey, like you were going to be sick. 
He strokes your back comfortly, “ Y/n, if you need to step out...”
“I can’t...I have to stay...” You whisper, watching Thor get beat by the Hulk. You prayed that he would get up. Then it happened.
A bolt of lighting shot the Hulk off of Thor. Then he rises, lighting engulfing his hands. The two charge at each other, and Thor starts to gain the upper hand. You breath a sigh of relief. The audience eats it up. Chanting “Thunder”, but the Grandmaster does not seem happy. Just as Thor was about to finish the fight, he was stunned by something, leaving him motionless on the ground. 
You freeze, watching as your father leaped into the air and came down, smashing Thor into the ground and knocking him out. Finishing the match. You turn to see the Grandmaster lean back in pleasure. 
“So, how do you like it?” He asks casually.
You can barely speak. Too shook up to even form a thought. Seeing your unease Loki spoke for you.
“It was very intense. A very entertaining fight indeed.” He says with a smile.
“What’s wrong with the kid?” the Grandmaster asks taking in your pale face. “ She does not look good.” 
“Yes! Well, um, it seems as though she has eaten something that made her sick. Perhaps it was the jar jar fruit”
“Oh no,” The Grandmaster states, “This is terrible.”
“Yes well--”
“I had a whole bowl!”
“Yes...I’d better take her to her room. Rest shall do her some good.”
Then Loki rises and helps you to your feet. He leads you through the crowds of people. 
You can barely walk. You don’t know why you’re reacting like this. You knew your father was here. 
Maybe it was because of how gruesome this fight could have been. Or maybe because you knew that for four years, your dad has been trapped as the Hulk, murdering aliens as a gladiator for some old lunatic. And it seemed like he liked it. 
Your legs grow weak and you nearly topple to the ground. 
“Woah, easy.” Loki says, “ Darling, take it slow.” 
“I- I think I’m going to throw up” And then you lean over, throwing up into a plant. 
“Ew.” Loki says, watching you defile that poor plant. 
You wipe your mouth and try to stand, you sway a but, almost falling to the ground. Loki then sighs and scoops you up. 
Your face burns, “ I’m sorry...”
“Shut up. I shouldn’t have made you go anyways.”
You stay silent. Resting your head on his chest as he walks you to your room. 
“You know...my dad never did this...” You whisper. Loki looks down at you in confusion.
“Did what?”
“ Carry me to my room. Especially if I was sick.”
“Oh..” Loki says, not really knowing how to respond.
“My mom was the one who did all that. But then...she got sick and...” You trail off. It was rare when you thought about your mom. It hurt to remember all the good times the three of you had, so like your father, you pushed it all down. 
“My mother did that too..” Loki muttered. He walked into your room and set you on the bed. 
“Get changed and lay down. I shall be back in a moment.” Then he walks out, leaving you alone with your thoughts. 
You change clothes and ay down. Trying to wrap your head around what just happened. 
Your father was here. You found him.
But he was the Hulk and basically a gladiator. 
He’s been here for four years. Killing people for sport. 
“God, I may have seen some weird shit living with the Avengers but this really takes the cake”, You think to yourself, shifting under the covers. You sigh, laying on your back and staring up at the ceiling. After a few moments you heard the door open. It was Loki holding a tray of food.
“Here, this should make you feel better.” He says placing the tray in your lap. It consisted of a plate of some kind of soup, some cracker like snack, and a glass of water. 
“I know it looks heavy, but it made me feel better when I was a child and ill. Although, the one made by the cooks back home may have tasted better.” Loki rambles, “I do think I did pretty well, considering the circumstances.” 
Seeing this side of Loki was shocking. Sure, you both had your moments and you knew he cared about you, but you thought it was more like a forced partnership. But, he could have left you here alone and he didn’t. He went out of way to make you something so you’d feel better. You can feel your eyes water. 
And for the first time since you’ve been on Sakaar, you cried. You cried because you haven’t seen your father for four years. You cried because you were on a completely different planet, millions of light years away from your home. You cried because Loki was being so kind.  
You cried cause you were scared.  You felt like you were in over your head, like you can’t do anything but wait. You have no idea what you’re going to do from here on out and it terrifies you. 
Then you feel a cold hand on your shoulder. You look up to see sad green eyes. Then you’re pulled into a hug. 
“I know.” Loki says softly, “It is overwhelming, and you’re still a child.”
You take a deep breath, taking in the scent of leather and something sweet. You then closed your eyes sinking into the embrace.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In another part of the castle, Thor had just woken up. Scaring the crap out of the women who were tending to his wounds.
He painfully stands up, looking around the room he was in. It wasn’t like the first cell he was in. No, this one was actually clean. It didn’t smell like body fluids or...death. It was red and white, with weapons and armor laying around. He can see a large bed and a hot tub in the room. 
Thor looks out the window, taking in the scenery and trying to figure out a way to escape. He’s startled out of his thoughts by a splash. He turns to see the Hulk in the tub, sitting in the shadows.
“...Are we cool?” He asks, holding his hands up in surrender. 
He doesn’t get a response, just a low growl. But he isn’t attacked so Thor takes it as a a sign. He goes to the window again and mutters to himself, “Huh, a Hulk in a hot tub.” 
Then he turns to Hulk, “ How long have you been like that?
“Like what?” Hulk grunts
“Like this. Big, green, and...stupid”
Hulk sits up slightly, half of his face in the shadows, “Hulk always Hulk.”
Thor doesn’t respond, opting to look out the window again, then he realizes,
“How’d you get here?”
“Winning” Hulk says proudly.
Thor rolls his eyes, “ Do you mean cheating? Did they have one of these shocky things on their necks? I meant, how did you arrive here.”
Hulk imitates a whooshing and crashing noise, “Quinjet.”
Thor gets excited, “ Yes! Okay and where is the quinjet now?” 
Hulk doesn’t respond, instead he gets out of the tub. The only problem is that he didn’t have a towel...or anything to cover himself. Giving Thor a good look at his goods.
“That’s naked...very naked” Thor says cringing. “ That’s in my brain now.”
“Quinjet.” Hulk says, pointing to where the plane is. Uncaring about the state of undress he was in.
Thor gets excited again, “Yes! I can get us home, off of this awful planet. You’ll love Asgard! It’s like earth but gold”
“Hulk stays.” Hulk grunts, taking a bit out of some fruit.
“What? No no no, I need your help to prevent Ragnarok.” Thor says desperately.
“Ragnarok?” Hulk questions uncaringly. 
“Yes, its the destruction of my home planet, the end of times.”
“Thor go. Hulk stay.” Hulk says stubbornly. 
Thor is desperate. He needs to get home before Hela completely destroys everything he holds dear.
‘Look, I’ll tell you what, you help be get to Asgard, and I’ll help you get back to earth.’
“ Earth hate Hulk.”
“What?” Thor exclaims, “ Everyone loves Hulk! You’re part of the team, you’re our friend!”
“Banner’s friend.” Hulk grunts, not believing a word Thor is saying.
“WHat? I don’t even prefer Banner” Thor says awkwardly, “ He’s all ‘ NUmbErs aND SCienCe’ and stuff.”
“Banners friend!” Hulk exclaims. 
By now Thor is frustrated, “Fine. You stay here on this awful planet. Besides this room his hideous. The red and white, like just pick a color.”
“Smash you.” Hulk grunts
“You didn’t smash me, I won that fight.”
“Smash you!” Hulk throws the fruit at Thor.
Thor dodges it calling Hulk a baby. He heads toward the entrance that is left open.
“Thor go!” Hulk shouts.
“I am going!” Thor shouts back, but before he can step out of the room he’s shocked. The obedience puck stunning him
 As he falls to the ground, he can hear Hulk laugh. 
“Thor no go. Thor home.”
He sighs, looking out the window. He briefly hears Hulk say something about training. Then he sees her. The woman who got him into this mess in the first place. 
She pays no mind to him, instead greeting Hulk like they were long time friends. 
They go train, leaving Thor alone with his thoughts. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You wake up in the dark room. It seems that Loki has left as you were alone. Your eyes sore from crying, you look around for your bag. You find it, pulling out your phone, earbuds, and journal. 
You write your feelings as you listen to music. 
You don’t know what to do. Part of you wants to go find your father and Thor, but another part trusts Loki and wants to stay. It doesn’t help that he has been the most fatherly figure you’ve had in a  while. 
Sure you had the Avengers. You could even argue that Tony has filled that role of father figure since your dad went missing. But, you and Loki formed a tight bond in a few days that took months for you and Tony to form. You both got along well, bonding over distant fathers, dead mothers, and theater. Not to mention you both had a sarcastic attitude. If anything, he’s taken over a big brother role, but nevertheless; betraying his trust was one thing that you couldn’t do.
You sigh, knowing what you were going to do. 
You were going to find your father.
So you get out of bed and change into your suit. You put your phone in your stuff in your bag and grab your weapons. 
You walk down the hallways, not knowing where to begin to find your father. Then an idea hits you. If you can find out where Thor is, you’d most likely find out where your dad is. So with that in mind you decided to ask a guard. 
“Excuse me.” You say to a red guard, “ Do you know where the …”Lord of Thunder” is staying? The Grandmaster allowed me to go and meet him. I am a big fan” 
The guard hesitated, not knowing who you were. But since you dropped the Grandmasters name, he pointed you to the hallway Thor was supposedly in. 
“Thank you!” You beamed, making sure to skip away as if you were a fan. You skip till you were out of sight and sigh, slowing down to a walk. You strolled down the hallways, throwing fake smiles at the guards you passed. 
Finally, you reached a room at the end of the hallway. You notice a woman pass you and walk staright into the room. You hide behind a wall and listen to the conversation. 
“Hey big guy!” She says, you notice that she has an accent similar to Thor’s.
“Angry girl!” another voice says...Your fathers voice. You can hear footsteps coming your way. You quickly pull out your phone and sit down, hoping they’ll walk right past you. You don’t need Hulk seeing you right now. If anything, he’d change back to Bruce and that’ll cause a whole bunch of problems. 
Thankfully, they pay no mind to you. You watch as they joke around and nudge each other. It’s strange, seeing the Hulk to at ease with another person. 
It kind of hurts, in the same way it hurt to see your dad with Natasha. It was like you couldn’t get close to either side of him. Or he chose not to get close to you. 
Pushing away your feelings, you get back to the mission, finding Thor. 
You head  to the room at the end of the hallway. Surprisingly, there were no guards or even a door blocking your way. You can see Thor, standing by the window. His back was turned to you but he was completely still. 
You walk through the door way, and look around the room. It was messy and kinda ugly. The red and white really didn’t clash well.
Then you were startled by Thor loudly gasping. You run up to where he was.
“Thor? Thor are you alright?”
He focuses on you, eyes widening at your presence. 
“Y/n?” He says slowly, “ Y/n?! What are you doing here?”
“The Dr. Wizard said my dad was here. So I came looking for him...” You say slowly. “ Are you okay?”
“I’ve been better.” Thor laughs, “ Have...have you been here this whole time?”
“Yeah, I got here the same day Loki did, so about two weeks ago. Since then I--”
“Wait, have you been with Loki this whole time?” Thor asks.
“Yeah, he’s the reason I’m still alive to be honest.” You say, “ He helped me get in favor of the Grandmaster and he’s been looking out for me ever since.”
“Loki?” Thor says in disbelief, “ My brother, Loki? He has been taking care of you?”
“Yeah, I didn’t believe it either...but he’s been so kind to me, Thor. Kinder than anyone has been in a while.” You say softly. 
Thor smiled, he was glad that there was still a part of the Loki he knew growing up. That you were alright. 
“You look awesome.” He says taking in your outfit, “Where did you get those clothes?!” 
You laugh, “ It seems like the Grandmaster likes to give make overs.” You look at Thor, “ Dude they cut your hair?!” 
“Yeah some creepy old man cut it off.” He says, suddenly he pulls you in for a hug. “ I am beyond glad to see you here.” 
You blush and hug him back, “I’m glad you are okay.’
Then you frown, “ My...my dad...he’s here.”
Thor freezes, “ Oh Y/n I completely forgot..”
“It’s okay... he looks fine” You say bitterly, remembering how chummy he was with that girl.
“ He can’t know I am here.” You say quickly, “ If he does, he’ll change back and raise suspicion.”
“I need help to get out of here.” Thor says, “ Asgard is in danger.”
“Why don’t you just walk out the door?” You ask
“Because, this neck thingy shocks me whenever I try to leave.” Thor says showing you his neck.
“Ohh so that’s why you lost the fight,” You say realizing what happened.
“I dis not lose” Thor said, “Your father cheated.”
You snicker, “What ever you say Lord of Thunder.” 
Thor sighs at the name, knowing that you weren’t going to stop calling him that. 
“Y/n, I need you to help me get out.” Thor says desperately. You furrow your brow, thinking of a way to get him out of here. 
“Okay...I have an idea.” 
You spend the next thirty minutes comin up with an idea. Revising and editing ideas that’ll get him out of here unscathed. 
That’s when you realized that you shouldn’t be here when Hulk gets back. 
“I have to go.” You say quickly, gathering all your stuff. 
“Wait, wait, how are you going to escape...” Thor says worriedly. “ Your father doesn’t even know your here.”
You sigh sadly, “ I doubt he cares. He seems pretty content here.” 
“Y/n, that’s Hulk, not Banner. Your father loves you.” 
You chuckle, “ You know, in last few weeks. Loki showed he cared about me more than my father has in all the years I’ve been alive.”
“Oh...that’s bad.” Thor says, because if you knew Loki cared about you and not your father...that was saying a lot.    
“Good luck Thor, I better go before some guards show up.” You say, patting his arm and dashing off. And again, Thor was alone. 
Running through the hallways, you bump into someone. You fall to the ground in a huff.
“Watch where you’re walking!” 
“Sorry dude, jeez don’t get your undies in a twist.” You say, getting up from the ground. You look up to see the girl who was with the Hulk. 
“Do..do I know you? You look familiar.” She says, closely looking at your face. 
“Umm, I tell stories to the Grandmaster.” You say quickly, “I better go.” 
Then you run off again, leaving a confused Valkyrie behind. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You finally make it to your room. Panting as you close the door.
“Where have you been.” 
You jump, not expecting anyone to be in your room. 
“Relax, its just me.” Loki says, rolling his eyes, “ Now, where were you? I came back into your room, expecting to find you in bed, resting.”
“Sorry, I... I went to see Thor.” You say honestly. 
“Y/n.” Loki starts, but you interrupt him.
“I know! I know I shouldn’t have gone, but I felt really bad and wanted to make sure he was okay.” 
Loki sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. He looked at your face, seeing your guilty eyes and frown. He’s demeanor softened, “ You are too kind for your own good.”
You chuckled, “Well, one of us has to have redeemable qualities.”
“Hey!” Loki shouts offended. You laugh at his face.
“I can get used to this” You think to yourself. You yawn, suddenly tired from all your activities.
“Get some rest.” Loki says, “You’ll need it’” 
Then he leaves the room after ruffling your hair.
As you get ready for bed and finally lay down, you realize you can’t sleep.
 You have a crushing feeling that something big was going to happen the next day.
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thecoloursdontshow · 3 years ago
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sambucky as parents with a teen bc i love them (alternate title: im projecting again)
they both freak the FUCK out when they their kid is actually growing up and sarah is the only who could deal with them and the fact that her niece is growing up because at this point shes done the like twice now. its also very amusing to watch captain america and the winter soldier have a breakdown because their kid is growing up and sarah is like “yeah thats how that works” but they are not having it because “OH MY GOD SARAH THEY BOUGHT EYELINER???” and sarah needs breaks every hour because oh my god. 
The avenger become aunts and uncles and it is the most wholesome thing ever. Bruce and peter would help them with their homework. Thor and valkyrie tell stories from asguard. Wanda watches sitcoms with them, and they have long talks when either of them are stressed out. Carol and hope teach them how to fight, much to the dismay of sam and bucky. Strange and them team up and try to (and succeed, mind you) prove sam and bucky wrong. (ight its time to be SAD)
Imagine, if you will, they have a daughter, and the daughters name is natasha. She never really knew where she got her name from, only whispers of natasha romanoff. She saw her name, heard her name at school, but never really knew who she was. Why she was named after her. So, one day, she asked sam: “dad, where did my name come from?” and sam sits her down, and slowly, he explains who natasha was. How she led the avengers in a time where no one really knew what was going on. Who she was to sam, and who she was to the world. Sam doesnt go into her past too much, just that it was bad. When sam finishes, his voice is as quiet as a whisper. Natasha smiles softly at him, shuffling closer to him, and wrapped her arms around him. “I promise, i’ll do her name justice.” and sam falls apart. Because sam knows she will. He knows that nat would absolutely love this kid. This kid with warm brown eyes and long, dark brown hair that she so desperately wants to chop off and dye blue. This kid who always has a joke or quick remark on her tongue. This kid who cares so much. This kid who sang in the shower, and sang with her father (even if bucky was forcing her to). This kid who never gave up, who got back up on her own since she was 4 years old. This kid, who sam would give his life for, who sam would never forget. Who natasha would absolutely adore. Now, natasha gets little stories about her namesake from clint, and yelena, and scott, and rhodey, and pepper, and her dads. At first, it hurt. It hurt so bad. But, when yelena started telling a story from when they were kids, and natasha smiled wide, her eyes crinkling up. Her laugh that was so innocent, so pure. And yelena smiled too. And it was okay. 
SORRY ABOUT THAT LMAO. had to get my daily dose of natasha romanoff feels. Anywho. 
Partners. Significant others. Thats when they realize their is grown up. Thats when they realize they dont a million years left with this kid. So they pull out all the stops. Baby photos, videos, old school work from like grade 2. Its glorious. They would be so embarrassing oh my god. 
But its not always like that. Bucky retired as soon as they adopted, but sam couldnt. He couldnt. So, when natasha (im sticking to it) grows up a bit, she only known as captain americas daughter. Only known as the girl with the empty seat beside her apologetic looking father at every play. And shes sick of it. She knows its irrational, but she just wants her dad. Thats all shes really ever wanted. One day, she comes home, her eyes rimmed red, and bucky tries to talk to her, but she races up to her room, slamming her door shut. Bucky freezes. He doesnt know what to do. Sams been gone for a week and a bit, and neither of them are taking it well. After an hour, she doesnt come down from her room. Buckys been pacing for the past our. He makes his way up the stairs, and knocks on her door. “Tash?” he hears a sniffle, and shuffling, and the door opens slowly. Shes red eyed, stuffy nose and bucky cant believe he let her hurt like this. “I just need him here.” is all she says, before crashing into bucky. He wants to break down right there, but he doesnt. He wraps his arms around her, until he decides on a plan. They settle on the couch, the star wars theme playing. They ordered pizza, and natasha fell asleep with her head pressed against buckys metal arm. Sam gets home a few hours later. He takes one look at the scene in front of him and realizes how much time he’d missed. How much of his daughter, of his family he had missed. He vows to make sure hes there. To make sure he doesnt miss anymore of the best part of his life.  
Idk what happened yall. I really dont.
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sergeant-angels-trashcan · 3 years ago
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So like. Time fugitive young avengers
TRYING to find the only time traveler they know and the one who prolly sorta likes them???
So like eli and Billy and teddy appear during Sylvie and Loki's sword fight to yoink Kang
Which is the real reason he disappears
Kang legit crying because??? His friends??? Who he had to keep pruning from the timeline???
ABOUT THAT.
So none of them are the same ages because it's funny
I want Billy and teddy to be a middle aged married couple who are just SO DONE and Kate's like I was literally JUST at your wedding, WHY DOES THIS SHIT KEEP HAPPENING TO ME AT WEDDINGS????
Kate refers to kang as "my good bitch" and nothing else
They have nate which allows them to grab loki. The post saakar killed by thanos but not quite Loki
Also. This is a verse where when loki fell off the bifrost he got younger and then wound up with the YA. Endverse!kid!loki is a variant of that time
Kang also cries when he sees Cassie
They expect kang to be this hardass and really hes just SO TIRED, YOU GUYS, and he's so glad to have help
Which is not what they were expecting
Tommy keeps holding up rope all "so no tying him to a chair?"
He gets berated for trying to bring bondage into everything
thATS NOT WHAT THIS IS
At some point they're like you let steve do WHAT. the home of phobia.
Also theres a variant peggy that shows up. Kate and America keep ooo.ooo ing at her
The gay vibes are impeccable
Nate calls Kate "my solid ho"
I kind if want Kate to be the "youngest". Like she's the first one they nabbed but they got her earlier in her timeline than the rest of the team. Shes still like mid late 20s and everyone is weeping emoji at her shes such a BABY and Kate growling no goddamnit I'm a small business owner I pay taxes I am NOT baby
But ONLY if it's funny if Kate being the youngest for once isn't funny then no go hoes
Kate, Nate, and Loki doing obnoxious sprawling all over each other as the youngest oldests
Why is Kang unhinged? That is why. "The floor is lava and the only safe place is UR LAP"
Also have I mentioned agent mobius is noh? I have? Great. Because he is.
And that Casey is Jonas?
Awesome.
So that vibe the gotg had in their first movie..."them?" and "those dipshits?" that's the vibe of this young avengers. With the bonus that they were once competent and organized etc etc but not with these versions of each other
At some point "shhh come on this is Kate's funeral be quiet."
"Yeah don't turn it into a roast this time."
"Shut up ur dead u dont get a say."
but also like. maybe.
so when the timeline exploded all of those timelines existed fully at that moment
which is how they can pluck people at different ages etc.
so Nate Knows about the Young Avengers and a Good Nate comes and Grabs Loki, and they “go to the leader of the young avengers”
which to nate either means another him, or maybe jonas, or eli?
and it’s KATE. who he, like, sort of knows? but why is she the one they got taken to--
“I’m the leader of the young avengers, that’s why, jerk. Also hi Loki.”
“I’m sorry who are you?”
Kate is OFFEND.
Nate is just confused as to HOW. She wasn’t even??? On the roster???
“Yeah well i guess you’re just lucky.”
the fact that loki gets the team together the second time but he doesn’t even know her is irritating, meanwhile loki is making fun of “young avengers” what was there a BABY THOR, a MINI HULK
Nate has to implement a “no stabby no shooty” rule after he’s done laughing
Loki is CONSTANTLY unnerved by how much Kate seems to know about him
some things he didn’t even know about himself? like a breakfast obsession???
Kate being with them helps the other grabs go easier
at some point they’re talking about the TVA and they have pictures for some reason. 
“wait wait go back”
“yeah ok we need to grab those two”
she’s only KIND of offended when Noh has no idea who she is but seems to have a crush on Loki. Rude, but ok. 
Jonas is all “took you long enough, hang on let me grab some infinity stones”
“fucking WHAT.”
for some reason they wind up at the End, surrounded by Lokis.
and then it’s an argument about which Loki is better for the team. Which variant!loki is VERY offended by
this is just a group of people who MUST offend one another
Kate is. um. VERY adamant about the Loki she wants. 
“My vote is for the lizard.”
cue kid!loki peering from behind something: “Kate?”
“LOKI??”
“CHCANGED MY MIND We’re taking the Kid.”
“no, we’re not, I vote for me” variant!loki says this and gets blasted by vote loki loki
Kate nixes vote loki loki because she ALREADY DEALT WITH THAT. vote loki loki is trying SO HARD. c’mon kate. i know you LOVED trolling me on twitter. pick me!
“No, we’re taking the Kid.”
Nate tries to argue this point.
“We’re. Taking. The. KID.”
no one agrees with her
“Saying it slower doesn’t make it a reason.”
“Oh you want reasons? Reason one: i know this lil shit.” a secret handshake of sorts ensues.
“Reason two: I can manhandle him” Loki gets tossed over her shoulder. he is very unimpressed
(”he is easier to punt that way,” America points out. She currently has another Loki in a headlock.)
“Reason three: i know how he lies.”
“Reason four: we’re bros.”
These reasons impress NO ONE. 
but it is how they wind up with a gaggle of lokis.
Kate and Kid!Loki are very mean to each other. i just want to point that out. but like a dipshit mean sibling energy. they make fun of each other’s ages all the time.  
the vibe of the young avengers is “we WILL save the multiverse but we’re going to be as chaotic as possible while doing it”
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givsmn · 2 years ago
Text
my live reaction to Thor: Love and Thunder
okay. so far. i am NOT lovin this. "im tired" dies THATS SAD I'M SAD NOW IT'S TOO EARLY FOR THIS
BIG SAD RN BIG BIG BIG SAD HES LYIN BESIDE HER GRAVE
yes i would say he's suffered severely but i would not recommend followin the eery whispers in the wind
ooh green, we like green
bro your daughter coulda surv- what'd you slice your palm on
Rapu? that you?
Gorr… babe you don't look so good- aw he's so cute when he smiles
RAPU FUCK YOU
$10 Gorr finna pick up that sword and dice Rapu
oh well he didn't pick up the sword, it presented to him
AW I WANNA FLOWER PERSON
ooh gold blood, pick that shit up
Steve T-T Tony T^T i hate that thing MOON MOON !!!
musics great tho
KORG, baby
omfg he baby
"fighting the good fight for those who can't fight good" lmfao
Fonda gave me whiplash fr
SHUt UP KORG JFC MY GODS
GROOT <3
DAD BOD, GOD BOD, SAD BOD I CANNAE KORG PLEASE
lmfao Quill did not ask for this
bro Stormbreaker grew roots?
… why is he witch ridin Storkbr- yk what, nvm
DIE SCUM
stfu Thor, you embarrass me sm
OMG the AESTHETIC ASDFGHJKL
GUNS N' ROSES BABYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
my heat is racin rn sm
THE SPLITS WHAT TTTTTT
lmfao omg the GOTG cannae
bro you broke their temple. it finna shatter ain't it
yep, yep, there it is. poor fellas
Jane Fonda, hello
istg if Darcy eats those w sticks ima flip
yikes, four. sorry bro
she didn't use the sticks!
hope Darcy notices myuh-myuh's gone
self experimentin, are we?
SELVIG <3
wait wait is she finna find Mjolnir and put it back together to give her health
VALKYRIE
i'd buy that spice, please
INFINTY CONEZ!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
wow, they're boomin, that's great
oh gods, more theater
ALAN GRANT?!?!!!!!
bitches, Odin did NOT stand up and no you won't, perish
glitter, glitter mfs
"Transform!" ????!?!?! LIKE POWER RANGERS!?!?!??!
oh gods, McCarthy
this whole thing gave me a stroke, i love it
Jane Fonda finna steal them stones, i get
YEP IT'S FONDA
oop, ominious weather and vibrations oohoohooh
they're levitating
GOD OF DISASTER? ? ? ?
who the fuck is screa- oh good gods
they jus didn't want the goats
NEBULA <3 hi babe
oh where Gamora?
WAIT MANTIS W A GUN!?
omg they can understand them i cannae please please
no that's not it, ima have a stroke
congrats, babe. how many spouses?
Sif's alive? bro i did not know that
he visibly and audibly deflated
inspirational speech, Quill <3 thanks
pft pft pft i'm chockin Let Go Thor Let Go
that's His ship bro, bro, bro
IM CHOKING IM HAVING A STROKE THOR MOVE
you frickincrazy axe
(GOATS SCREAMING)
barren ice wasteland
Falligar is adorable, wHY ARE THEY DEAD THEYRE ADORABLE
bro she's missin an arm
you're not in battle PFT OH SHIT
oh nu, not assgard god butcher
oop ominious figure in white, how sexy
sleepin children
(SINISTER MUSIC PLAYING)
reminds me of the angel of death in the Moses sto- NVM BIG ASS SPYDERS
VAKLYRIE ASDFGHJKL ON HER PEGASAUS BABEEEEEE IN PJS
oh smoll boys
lmfao blood splatter on the camera
METALLIC HUMMING OVERHEAD BABE
AHEHEHEHE DEMONIC GIGGLING
TESSA THOMPSON, MARRY ME POR FAVORA PALIHUG NA
???? he jus treated myuh-myuh like a mf dog jfc
vrooms past i bet HA got it
oh hello ms. FondaBRO THATS SO DAMN COOL IT SPLIT LIKE BUMBLEBEE DID OMFG OMG OMGOMG OMGOMGOMGOGMSOGJSPOFGJOPSFGJPSGJSPGOJSFPOJGPSFOGJSGJ
pft Thor please
it's ms. Fonda to you, childe
omfg the rollerskates thing i cannae please
halloween party??? bro no stop doin myuh-myuh like that
oh yea cryin durin comedy's ik that
Nick Furry.
poor babes
i feel liked that's not how legend-myth works but idk enough abt it to contend
panic attack?
oh you poor idiot
oh bro spoogies
Thor's so shiny tho
~then you know this is going to hurt~
oof raggity man
VALKYRIE <3 <3
blinker light eyeballs fr
bros goin for the children tho idk how they've been sleepin thru it all
THEYRE TAKIN THE CHILDREN
what in the fresh fuckery was that cage on legs
Eight years, seven months, and six days.
please stop bickering
Daryl
THEATER
Jodie Fonda.
bro you srsly tryna call myuh-myuh from her
OMFG STORMBREAKER
is this real? feels like a fever dream
slowly creeps in
STOP BETRAYIN STORMBREAKER YOU ASS
should Thor intervene? bc it might undermine her, idk how this stuff works
what's squeaking
pft
oh good lords
Valkyrie is exhausted
CAPE GROWS BACK?
Heimdall had a son?
AXL
hoi, respect his name
magic eyes
Thor~!
i like Axl sm
pft "oh my god. go away"
those children are finna start cryin, shut up Thor
JODIE FONDA WHY'D THAT COME OUT OF YOUR MOUTH STOP IT
omnipotence city
QUETZALCOATL theyre mentioned in my fanfic
Zeus is not wise
goats
she's still an alcholic
myuh-myuh
Thor you're a chil- omg Stormbreaker
oh shit Jane.
geez what'd you go and do that for
Valkyrie <3 3 <3 <3
they're so damn cute
THEY BOOPED SWORD AND MYUH-MYUH
pft don't feed on the children please thanks
those goats make me wanna shoot myself in the foot
the city so pretty- what'd you go and wreck the lawn for babes
Jodie, Jodie, Jodie stop, stop, stop please
he has a boyfriend, it's Bruce
so cool
Valkyrie's so amused
he has feelings for Jodie Fonda
VALKYRIE YOU'RE GREAT
Axl <3 <3 <3
Gorr <3 <3 <3
Gorr, that's not how you bond w children, mate
pft she slaughtered the emotion gods
DRAGON OMG DRAGON ITS A DRGON
BAO??? I WANT BAO
hmmmm zeus
oh good gods how theatrical jfc
omg he copied zeus in every way
Thor's a nerd through and through, fanboy
tf accent is that
HA orgy
?? oh yea he's not that great
HA AGGRESSION the aggression confuses him
en masse.
did he finger gun shackles
oh here it comes
like, it's funny. but also, i'm imaginin that happenin to a woman and :[]
he's prolly gon be reinvited to the orgy
bro the bearded harp guy fainted
T-T his tats
A SHY COURGETTE!?!?!?!? A ZUCCHINI!?!?!!?!?!?!?!
pft disguise off
you tell him, babe
so, chill, baby cake
the theatrics!? "no"
Valkyrie's muscles i cannae please please please
omg Jodie Fonda's muscles i cannae please please please
his accent, it's givin me a stroke
"rush his bum"
lmao i love Fonda's excitement "hell yeah!" knocks off someone's head
JANE'S HAMMER STILL IS SO AWESOME
aw yisssss ms. Valkyrie, relish the goldblood spray
!? KORG nononononononnonono cmon fOR WHATOH DHIT HE CAUGHT IT oh gods the line
i feel like that wouldn't kill him tho
Kog Korg KORG!? omg baby, you're alive PFT mouth
omg that's such a pretty whi- wow, yea no i liove the screamin goats and GNR better
T^T marry me? please, Valkyrie
yO THOSE THINGS STARING INTO THE WINDOW BEFORE THEY FLEW OUT LOOKS LIKE CELESTIALS
screaming goats on rainbows w rock and roll in the bg is my new aesthetics
he's so good w kids, so sweet
"Team Kids in a Cage"
why's he keep messin w his no- ha
Korg loved it, noted
i thought you needed the necrosword to kill gods
omg Stormbreaker's jealous- THOR YOUR'RE BEIN DISLOYAL
i'm more invested in Thor x Stormbreaker then Thor x Jane
… he fed it beer… hE SCRATCHED THE UNDERCHIN WHAT
his lil thing when she turns around is the fattest mood i have ever witnessed
Korg music? pft omg that's cute
thanks Korg, you stripped her bare
yep, this is real, that fumbling lmao
oh the fear in her eyes
"bye"
he's good at comfortin, once he calms down a bit
Thor baby
oh no, the color, it's broken
WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT LANDING HA
oh nu the bone cage is empty
their pinkies T-T
is myuh-myuh so broken it cannae summon the Bifrost?
oh bro she yeeted
Gorr, you're spoogie, i love it
yea idk if the dentist can help w that bud
ha he's a lil fanboy too, omg. his giggle was adorable
baby, she's crying
i find his face fascinatin
oop he's chokin em
his hand was on his shoulder, so faint
… tentacle porn is completely plausible and acceptable it's accepted i accept it
it's funny how he keeps sproutin from the shadows like a whack-a-mole
omg myuh-,yuh
oh no the boat!
bro i completely forgot abt Korg
HEY HE IMAPLED HER NO
oh nu he's got the key
oh bro she looks shit
a fridge without a door.
yea babe he goin w/o you
T-T bc he loves her, always
he still has Loki's hair twined into his own braids
damn she lost her whole kidney
yO head at 01:29:07 is movin
that was a celestial head that fell oh them
attackin children w shadow monsters? mateur Gorr
he's plannin on makin em whack the monsters w sticks?
Space Vikings, hooray
omg he's givin em power "for a limited time only"
HEY IT'S THAAT TREE OMGGG
GLOWY EYE CHILDREN I WANT THEM
GENERAL AXL
DO YOUR WOEST BABIES
OMGGGGG THE GINGER
MY HEARTRATE RN ASDFGHJKL
BEAT THEIR ASSES
DSKGJLKJDGLKSJGLKSJGKLSJGSGJSGKJLSGJ
YOU'RE DOIN SO GOOD BABIES, SO PROUD
OMGGGG AXL VAULTIN THRU THE AIR
lil baby girl fairy, you've my heart, you too floating girl w rabbit, i wish my Fluffy did that
way to be creepy Mjolnir
oh shit, he got decked
Jane Foster <3
go children, go!
let go of his friend, shadow tentacles !!!
her name is Mighty Thor, ass
Dr. Jane Foster is bomb
oh good lord, not that
I LOVE WATCHIN PPL CATCH THOSE THINGS AXL YOU DID SO GOOD
snap it in half, babes
couldn't it jus reform like myuh-myuh?
oh damn, she caught the bits
well this has a certain finality
oop she obliterated your sword pal
i imagine a lot of Aro's might be confused at this scene, but also not
did he not realize he could bring her back?
then use your wish to save Jane? as an apology?
ooooooooooh you're gon have your nemisis take care of your child, interestin
omg galaxy-reflection-girl, you're so pretty
Jane is a god.
see, she's gettin the gold dust fade, like od*n, that means she's a god. i take no criticism
she's cute
oh hi, Korg
ARE YOU SERIOUS
DWAYNE
this is so dumb i love it
omggg sad god to dad god
yes they'e pan flaps
what's that accent
HA
that's so accurate, w the shoes
omg myuh-myuh
Thor, referrin to myuh-myuh: where did you put HIM
the girl: eh, SHE looked boring before
Thor: eh, suppose IT did
d'aw her lil thumbs up in the mirror/head jig w helmet, so cute
HES SO SUPPORTIVE
she's wearin' Hulk's colors
??? why'd she get Stormbreaker? after all Thor's talk abt bein over his ex-weapon, smh
"The Space Viking and his girl, born from Eternity." i adore that line sm, wow
OMG IS HER NAME LOVE? HER NAME IS LOVE. THAT'S PERFECT
haha, Louis Despocito
Credits
ngl i expected the GotG to show up more for some reason
ugh not him. well, i was right. he's not dead
dude You Are a joke
Hercules??? well ig we know who our nxt villain will be, tho he seems a bit low lvl, so maybe he's a starter villian for Love
glow dust. it's Jodie Fonda ain't it. it is!
Heimdall!! HI BABE
she's in the land of the gods! knew it!
THOR WILL RETURN
Movie End
some thoughts are i like how it began w losin a daughter and ended w gainin one, it's sweet, poetic in a way ion understand ig
there was no Loki T-T i miss him, he would influence Love in the worst way possible and i want it
the beginning was kinda awkward but Thor was also especially awkward so it's fine, he was overcompensating, it's understandable
i can see ppl complainin abt how this movie serves "romantic love fixes all!" bc i legit jus saw s/o complainin abt it. and maybe it does? but so what. Thor's loves love and in the end, he ended up w a daughter
THE DAUGHTER. UGH. i love Love, she's great
SHE BETTER SHOW UP IN LATER MOVIES W LIKE TOM!PETER AND HARLEY AND CASSIE AND KAMALA OK? OK
THEYRE THE NXT GEN THEYRE THE NXT GEN THEYRE THE NXT GEN
i didn't like Jane in the first 2 movies- tbh i barely rmbr the first 2 movies -but i adore her now. i'm wonderin if the final scene was a hint at her comin back or Marvel jus tellin us where she ended up and that she is OK
Axl intrigued me. there was no mention of it, but i wonder if he's trans
first of all, the only experience i've had w the name Astrid is from HTTYD and searchin feminine names
secondly, when i changed my name, i also looked at bands lmfao
i really like how it was dealt w too, tho i wonder - if Axl is trans - if Thor knew of him prior. bc he didn't care when Valkyrie said he was Heimdall's son, only that Axl wanted to change his name
DARCY DIDNT SAY BYE TO JANE THATS SAD
all in all, i adore it and ion get why i saw so many bad reviews. there was personality in these movies, compared to the first 2 Thors
i hold it to equal height to Thor: Ragnarok and the only way it could've been better was if Loki was there- or Sylvi!
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peanut-butter-parkerxx · 3 years ago
Text
hickey prank...gone wrong
y/n wanted to prank the avengers for forgetting to hide a hickey she got from a 'mysterious boy' after she finished pranking them and telling them its fake, peter came in and NOT so subtly asked her when he did that since they're secretly dating
pairing: peter x stark!reader
status: secretly dating
y/n's pov
ive been watching a lot of youtube lately, it literally became my best friend, i scrolled through my recommendations and found a 'hickey prank' video, i smiled to myself already knowing im about to do it, and clicked on the video
It was a girl pranking her parents for getting a hickey, i watched the girl make the fake hickey on her neck, and i was considering to ask peter to do one for me that would be more entertaining but that would obviously backfire if i couldnt wipe it out
so i didnt ask him, another thing is that peter and i have been secretly dating for around a month now, my dad, tony stark, strictly told peter that i am off limits but were still dating and its been the best month ever.
anyways, i opened my vanity drawer and got my eye shadow pallet, i decided on a spot to make the 'hickey' and started adding dark colored eye shadow to make it look believable, the end result looked pretty good, and i know that from experience ;)
it ws on the right side of my neck right below my ear, i opened my two braids to cover the 'hickey' took my phone to record this i already know chaotic experience since this is the avengers we're talking about and left my room while i was walking in the hallway i got a text from peter saying:
MY baby 🥰🧸: coming in 15! xx
I squealed from excitment coz its been a week since ive seen him because of his exams and everything but back to the prank
i walked inside our kitchen/living room and the avengers were scattered everywhere since they just finished a mission and now theyre hungry af, perfect
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i snuck my phone behind a bowl of fresh fruits and acted normally trying to contain my nervousness and excitement
"hey guys!" i said looking at the kitchen island that filled with delicious hot meals, yumm
"hey sweetie" dad said kissing my cheek, and everybody mumbled a 'hey' since they're too busy stuffing theyre mouths with food
"hows the mission?" i asked curiously, thor, sam and scott completely ignored me trying to stuff everything in, nat and wanda were talking about how stupid one of the men were for flirting with them and comepletely beat the shit out of him for makig inappropriate comment, my girls I thought and steve, dad, bruce, and bucky answered my question
they've always had a soft spot for me and hated whenever i got ignored, i smile at them grateful that they didnt ignore me even though i wouldnt get mad i mean im also starving
i continued on eating arguing with sam on who will get the biggest slice of the chocolate cake wanda made, but then i remembered i came here to do the prank so i decided its time
i looked infront of me checking if my phone is still recording and it was, its been recording for 8 minutes now so i excused myself from the table to go 'get some fruit'
i quickly grabbed an apple and rerecorded the video, "so what do you guys wanna do? peters coming in a few" i said taking my hair and secured it behind my ear, its been exposed its been exposed omg omg omg i tried to calm down a bit coz in any second someone could spot my 'hickey'
"oh, we could have a movie night, you know, coz peter finished school so we should celebrate" my dad said looking at me then looking back at his food but looked at me again eyes widened, he spotted it ABORT MISSION OMG OMG
I looked down at my food trying not to run from the glare hes giving me
"y/n?" my dad asked, his tone has never been this serious before, oh shit
"y-yes" i squeecked god pull it together y/n, its not real
"what is that on your neck" he pointed out, which grabbed everyones attention, great, all eyes were on me, steve, bucky and bruce widened their eyes shocked, wanda and nat were smirking, sam, scott, and clint were laughing their asses off while thor looked as clueless as a baby
i was sitting at the center of the table and i just wanted to sink in and get absorbed my the marble walls
"w-what do you mean?" i asked 'confused' i grabbed nats phone that was between us, opened the camera and gasped trying to act surprised and scared "I-I uhhh" I let go of my hair so it can cover it again "I-I burned my self while curling my hair" I nervously blurted out, wow I'm a great actress
"that does not look like a burn young lady what is that?" Steve buts in, anger literally fuming from his ears and eyes Bucky glaring at me trying to think of every boy I've ever interacted with
"I curled my hair uncle Steve!" I replied rolling my eyes
"THAT IS NOT A BURN HUN THATS A HICKEY" my dad got out of his chair clearly getting angrier by the second
"ITS NOT DAD, YOU THINK I COULD HOOK UP WITH BOYS WHEN IM BEING WATCHED 24/7?" I shot back standing as well, everybody gasped
"what is a hickey if I may interrupt"
"SHUT UP" the rest of the team said clearly enjoying this
"I wanna know who's D y/n got" Sam said laughing
"was he at least good?" Nad asked smirking
"please tell me you used protection" Wanda asked concerned
"WHO IS IT" all three of them said
"NO ONE!" I shouted
"why is he that important that you have to be so secretive of him?" Bucky suddenly blurts out tightening his fists so hard his knuckles could pop out
"maybe he's special" nat smirked
"y/n" my dad said in a warningly tone "if you don't tell us who this idiot is I swear I'm gonna let Bruce turn into the hulk and smash every boys house that you've ever interacted with" I felt like that was enough, and obviously got everyone's attention, I tried to contain my laughter coz they're faced are just hilarious waiting for me to tell them who it is
"it's....it's...a-a..A PRANK!" I laughed, everybody looked at me speechless clearly not buying it
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN ITS A PRANK THERE'S STILL A HICKEY ON YOUR NECK" my dad shouted
"yeah a FAKE one" I took the wipe from my back pocket, wiping my 'hickey' and gestured to the smudged make up "SEE??" I laughed
Steve, Bucky, Bruce and my dad looked relieved, nat, Scott, Wanda, Clint, and Sam looked...disappointed?? And Thor was still clueless as ever, I walked to the counter to stop recording
"YOU WERE RECORDING?" Wanda scoffed
"do not do that to us a again young lady I was gonna get a heart attack" Steve warned leaving the table
"doll" Bucky said and I looked at him "if I ever see a boy with you this close" he gestured between him and I "I will squish their face and pull his brains out with my bare hand" he warned
and for a second I thought of Peter, I swear he's gonna get killed if they know what 'helping him study' and 'looking after me' means I just rolled my eyes at their stupid behavior
"so y/n didn't get any D yesterday? Poor thing" Sam laughs
"SAM I SWEAR YOUR NEXT ON THE LIST" dad said walking out of the kitchen
"for the first time in forever IM glad this was a prank coz the poor boy would've been dead just by the glares he'll get" I laughed shaking my head after the hilarious prank we cleaned up the kitchen island
"ok guys I'm gonna go to my room to clean this...mess" I gestured to my neck full of smudged make up
"hey guys, what did I miss?" Peter walked in the living room a few minutes after i left
"oh just y/n being y/n, she'll tell you what happened" Scott laughed which confused Peter but he ignored it m opened the fridge to get a snack and go to your room,
like I said it's been a week since he's seen you so he was very excited to kiss you hug you and just shower you with affection...in secret obviously
he knocked on my door doing our secret pattern and barged into my room
"HEY PETER" I almost shouted jumping onto him crossing my legs on his torso and snuggling my headphones to his neck
"hey baaaby" he whispered kissing my temple
"ITS BEEN AGES" I whisper shouted
"that it has" he whispered back finally connecting his lips with mine, And slowly walked to the bed, he sat down which resulted in me straddling his lap
"I missed you" I mumbled hovering his lips a bit
"I missed his more" his voice was lower than usual which made my hormones go haywire, he started pampering me with kisses
"I *kiss* miss *kiss* you *kiss* so *kiss* fucking *kiss* much" he said
"oh since when does innocent Peter Parker swear" i teased looking at his eyes
"since I've dated you" he shot back "when I started dating you, you made me feel and become like a normal horny teenage boy" he kissed me again
"well, im glad you feel...normal" I laughed, he started kissing my neck again and unfortunately my dad was walking past my bedroom at the time
"is this a bruise or just a very messy hickey I gave you, coz if it is I better fix it" he smirked already knowing it's not his but just finding an excuse to do one on me
"oh it's just a prank I did to the team which thankfully I recorded so you can see it"
"how bout I make it a real one?" He smirked
"Yes plea-"
"WHAT?" my dad barged in PERFECT TIMING DAD
"PETER BENJAMIN FUCKING PARKER YOU HAVE 3 SECONDS TO LEAVE THIS COMPOUND BEFORE I FRENCH FRY THAT WHAT I THOUGHT WAS INNOCENT BRAIN OF YOURS"
"RUN PETE RUNNN"
🏃‍♂️ 💨
Have a wonderful morning/afternoon/evening/night!
-quacksonlover
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kaz11283 · 4 years ago
Text
Chapter 5
Characters: Clint, you, Loki
Warnings: this is a SLOW burn, slight angst, fluff at the end, Loki starting shit.
Summary: life has never really bwen this complicated. Or well the life that you think you know has never really been this complicated. Living with the avengers, learning new things, yeah its gonna be a long road but what else do you have to look forward to other than the random runins with the god of mischief.
Loki Masterlist
~~~~~
It had been about a week since you had arrived at the tower and just as long as your incounter with Loki, you hadnt had much time to think about it though since you were normally nose deep in class work or training with Nat and Clint since Tony had sent you the message "If your gonna be an avenger you have to train like one, training starts at 6." You had left him on read after that, you had never been a morning person and you sure as hell wasnt about to start now.
"Alright y/n, lets try you on the bow today." Clint smiled walking into the arena where most of your training took place.
"After I finish this." You said pointing to your coffee. "I swear, you would think that after saving lives you would want to sleep in." You grumbled.
"Bad guys dont sleep, we dont get to sleep." Clint said wiping down a few of his practice arrows.
"You didnt get back till like 3 this morning. Im really starting to wonder if you sleep at all." You tossed your cup away and got up starting to do your stretches.
"Get over here so I can show you how to hold this thing." He saod holding out the bow.
"I know how to use a bow, I was in archery in high school. Top of my team." You grabbed the bow feeling the cool metal in your hand. His bow was diffrent than what you was use to, as light as air almost were yours had been heavy.
"This bow is probably a little different than what your use to. The metal is vibranium, the strings are made of some type of industrial woven string that Tony invinted in his lab. Might be a littlw hard for you to pull back." He smiled looking at the bow like a child.
"It is very beautiful." You examined it looking down the sights has you pulled the string back easily. "Absolutly magnificent peice of weaponry." You looked over at him and seen that he was staring at you wide eyed. "What?"
"No one else has ever been able to draw the string back like that." You let the string gently go back into place amd handed it back to him.
"I told you, I was in archery while I was in high school."
"Theres no way that someone no matter how skilled they are can pull that back."
"Well if your forgetting, apperantly Im not from here either."
"Yup almost forgot, Asguardian. Anyways. You know how to use one of these so lets set up a few targets and get to work. Tony wants to try you out on a few different things, eval you, and see what suits you best. Im already leaning toward you being good at the bow."
After he talked you through some of the basics that you had informed him you knew and he insisted on stating that it was 'mandatory' you were finally able to pick up one of the training bows.
"These bows suck. Stark has all the money in the world and he buys walmart brand bows? If you pull this one back to many times the string will break. Why cant I just use yours?" You roll your eyes looking back at Clint.
"My bow, my baby. If you want ine bad enough you can start off at the bottom and work your way up. You have a card why dont you buy one?" He countered, just then the foor opened drawing your attention.
"Sorry, didnt realize that the area was occupied today, I just wanted to get a few throws in woth the new daggers Stark and Banner decided to enhance for me. Wanted to make sure that they wouldnt bloe up in my face." Loki said walking over to the bay next to you and Clint. You hadnt had a moment alone with the trickster since in the hall weeks ago and now he was here acting as of nothingbhad happened. You looked down at the daggers that he had laid out.
"Wow, those are beautiful." You noticed that not only had he laid down two simple green handeled knives but he had also laid down a set of electric blue ones and a set of gold handle ones engraved with ancient symbols and roses with the stems winding down the hilt. "May I?" You asked leaning down to get a closer look.
"Of course y/n, you are the one that gave me those." He answered casually. Your breathing hitched and you turned to look at him.
"Thats not funny Loki."
"I dont know what your talking about. I was simpl-" he started before you cut him off.
"You know damn good and well what I am talking about. What did you expect? Me to pick it up and everything come barreling back to me? Here I'll do you one even better." You stormed up to the daggers and grabbed one of the gold ones up throwing it at the target on the far side of the room. You had expected it to fall short and clink to the floor but you never hears it fall. When you looked at the target you noticed you had hit the middle.
Clints jaw had dropped as he was looking around the wall to see what you had been yelling about. Loki looked at you with a smug expression. "I assume they must have had knife throwing classes at the school you attended as well."
"Shut up. Clint are we done, I have some studying for class that I really need to do." You looked at clint as he knodded still awestruck. "Thanks, I'll talk with Tony about getting a better bow for me to practice with." You took off toward your room.
Later after you had taken a hot shower and changed into some leggings and a baggy shirt you decided to go to the one place in the tower that you had decided to claim as your own little study corner. It was located on of of the high up floors that happened to be more of an observation deck, you could watch the team leave on missions, see the ocean, and watch some of the most beautiful sun sets that you had seen. You had notice while checking the place out that there was a fairly large window seat that you could spead your work out on as you looked out over the city, this small part of the tower was your little hid away, you hadnt seen any other member of the team up here so you figured when you needed the alone time you could come here. It had seemed to work for the most part until today.
You notice the shadow of the figure standing over you before looking up into the eyes of Lokis confused ones, you had noticed his lips moving before rolling your eyes and taking out your noise canceling ear pods.
"What do you want Loki?" You sighed placing them back into the chsrging dock.
"Well if you hadnt had those things in you would have heard me tell you that I was sorry for earlier." He sassed crossing his arms.
"How did you find me? No one really bothers coming up here." You pulled your legs under your chin and covering you feet with the throw that you had brought up with you this time.
"The AI system has no bounderies when it comes to privacy, it can tell you were anyone is in this god forsaken place." He responded. "May I sit?"
"And if I say no?"
"I'll sit anyways." He shrugged.
"Then what is the point in asking?" You leaned forward moving your papers and books out of the way. He reached down and grabbed a few of the papers to help you.
"Your doing a paper on Shakespeare?" He asked as he sat down reading over the page.
"Umm, yeah. Part of my agreement to come here is so that I can finish up my collage classes. Drama and Art Major." He hamded the paper back to you so that you could stick it in your binder. He gave you a look that you were use to getting from him. "Don't say it Loki." You out your hand up to stop him before he could even open his mouth.
"I wasn't going to say anything." He held his hands up.
"Hum, interesting. The god of lies actually sucks at lying. I should remember that." You smiled. This was the first time you had actually felt half way confortable around him.
"I could never lie to you." He smiled back. "You have always had a knack for seeing right through me."
"I wish you wouldnt do that." You sighed leaning your heas agints the window behind you.
"Do what exactly?" He askes mirroring your position.
"Where you mention something about my past. Its annoying and it breaks my heart."
"Well Dove, how do you think I feel? The worst part about it for me is that while you remember nothing I am stuck remembering everything. Your past, my past, our past together. It truly is the worst pain that I have ever felt. To have something that you have wanted for so long in front of you and they dont even want you back." He sighed looking out the window.
"Loki," you crossed your legs and placed your elbows on your knees. "I have never said that I didnt want you. I just dont know what is what."
"So you do want me?" He laughted.
"That is not what I meant and you know it." You leanded back again. "Tell me about us. About how you and Thor know me." He eyes lite up.
Chapter 6
Tag list:
@high-functioning-lokipath
@serpentargo
@drbaureid
@poetic-fiasco
@kgirardin
@sophlubbwriting
@supbeeches
@rosaline-black
@jesuswasnotawhiteman
@natandersonnla
@delightfulheartdream
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moonlit-imagines · 4 years ago
Text
Headcanons for being a younger Avenger and mentoring Kamala
Kamala Khan x reader
warnings: avengers game spoilers, guns
a/n: so excited about this one; i made y/n just a bit older (and gn!) so that they’re in their mid-early teens during a-day! hope thats okie doke! reader has electrokinesis. this accidentally got really detailed
prompt: anonymous: “Hey there! Would you mind writing HCs for the Avengers Game about female reader being a young Avenger (around 17) and mentoring Kamala Khan?”
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you were just a kid yourself when you joined the avengers
and you were an inspiration to kids around the world
“does SHIELD think nothing of child labor laws?” -bruce
the avengers became your family
and seeing what you could do...they knew you could handle yourself
and then a-day happened
the day started off so perfect
and the kids went ballistic over seeing you
“y/h/n! look, it’s y/h/n!”
“can i get a picture?”
“hi, guys! of course you can!”
but there was one kid who stuck out among the rest
kamala khan
“you’re the one who wrote about the sewers, right? i freaking loved it! may i just say your art is amazing?”
“r-really?”
“oh, yeah! and the part where you had thor spin mjölnir to push water towards the sewer lizards so i could shock them? genius!”
she could not wait to tell abu about what you had just said
you obviously took a selfie with her and handed her a little pin with your own “icon” on it
but your world got turned upside down that day
the battle was one you’d never forget
and the fighting with your own teammates afterwards would haunt you for years to come
“what do you know, y/n?! you’re just a kid!” -tony
“oh yeah? im one of the only functioning members of this team!”
“everybody calm down. y/n makes a good point, but—” -nat
“thank you”
“...but there’s some stuff you should leave up to us. you really shouldn’t have to take on so much responsibility” -nat
“she’s right, y/n. this was our fault” -bruce
“are you kidding me?! i’m just as guilty as the rest of you, i’m an equal member of this team! for years we’ve dealt with this together, taken the blame together! what’s changed?”
“y/n...you saw what we did out there. that changed everything...” -bruce
you technically were an inhuman, just not terrigen-based
didnt matter to AIM, they took dr. pym for god’s sake
so you had to run, you were on your own for a while
a long while
you laid low for five years, most boring five years of your life
at least you still had your life, though. it just wasn’t what it used to be
but you got a message one day
“‘tiny dancer,’ huh? my moneys on either nat or tony. nah, tony would have chosen ‘rocket man.’”
you couldn’t be sure, maybe it was just a random shield agent...maybe hank pym? god, this was crazy
the message brought you to, uh, cap’s memorial statue
and there was a young girl arguing with a couple of boys...an inhuman!
you hopped in and saved her, she seemed scared
“hey, kid, you alright?”
“y/h/n? is it really you?”
she seemed vaguely familiar
“are you tiny dancer?”
“no, i thought you might be? they sent you here, too?”
there wasn’t much time to chat, AIM was onto you
you two unfortunately got split up for a minute, but you were practically raised by the notorious clint barton and natasha romanoff, and various other spies
yes, you planted a tracker on her
and met her at the bus stop!
“you found me?”
“that i did, kamala. see, i do remember you”
“that is so cool! i mean—not almost getting killed, or the guy with the big head...”
“what guy? you need to tell me everything”
the whole busride was a bit overwhelming. kamala explained the resistance clues, her powers, her undying admiration for the avengers, you name it
but it made you feel good to know that there were people out there that didn’t hate you
“so what was it like? being the teenage avenger?”
“uh, it was...it was really cool. i felt like i was one-of-a-kind. but sometimes people didn’t take me seriously, it was kind of aggravating”
“yeah, no one takes me seriously either...”
“you know, depending on how this all goes, i might be able to give you a few pointers”
“really?! that’d be great!”
once you got to utah...you saw the chimera
it brought back some bad memories, kamala could tell
“you okay?”
“me? yeah, im good. just thinking...okay, well, do you have a plan on how to get yourself across all of this?”
“actually, i do!”
it was kind of creepy in there, but when you laid your eyes on caps shield, you kind of broke
“do you hear something, what it that?”
“...hulk. kamala, you need to get out of here, i’ll catch up to you, i swear”
she didn’t leave in time, so she got to see the greener side of bruce. you chased him back and tried to get bruce back
meanwhile, kamala found AIM troops...oops
bruce cooled off and man was he doing rough
“y/n, is that really you?”
“yeah, its me. surprise. how long have you been the big guy?”
“too long...a few years”
“jesus, im sorry. i’ll be right back, though. some kid brought me here, i gotta go get her. you kinda scared her off”
she was passed out when you got to her
but bruce is a doctor, he’d figure it out
“i could give her a little shock to wake her up, you know?”
“oh, i know. just let her rest for a minute. she needs it”
“right...well im gonna take a look around, maybe go see what i left behind. i could power the place up, but we’re missing some parts to actually get this thing running. best i can do is lights and doors”
you turned the little things on and turns out did leave a decent amount of stuff in here
your first pair of pistols that nat gave you, the gigantic stein that thor gifted you for your 13th birthday, gadgets tony needed an “extra boost” for *bzzt*, a note from cap that just said “good luck, y/n, you’re going to do great!” you cant even remember what it was he was referring to. you just missed him
kamala walked in while you were shuffling around and cleaning the place up
“hey, dr. banner wanted me to come get you. is this your room?”
“that it is, and it’s a huge mess. this is literally all my belongings ever”
bruce had his plan and you just went along, helping kamala out as you go
“baby steps, kam, don’t want you to pass out. but don’t worry, happens to the best of us” -you
“really? you pass out too?” -kamala
“oh yeah, for sure. tell her bruce, remember that time we had thor overcharge me to literally make me an EMP? and tony was busy listening to music so he wouldn’t get out of the blast radius and his armor shut down? so he was out of commission and i had just collapsed from it all? good times”
“y/n, we thought you died” -bruce
this hc is so long omg — anyways you guys ended up finding tony and it was sort of entertaining but he kinda punched bruce and then hugged you
“you got so big”
“shut up, tony”
you kinda harbored some bad feelings since none of the avengers did anything to help you once they started rounding up inhumans (but you still missed them)
getting attacked again
“okay, kamala, remember what i said about baby steps. dont overdo it. i trust you with this!”
“thank you, y/n! uh—oh my god!”
aaaanyways you went to the ant hill to see hank and pick up some supplies, boy was it great to see some familiar faces, then back the the chimera you went to fix it all up
“can you hold that right there for me, kamala? thanks. i think that just about does it. now i have a surprise for you...your own room!”
you helped kamala get it nice and tidy while talking about each other’s lives, she really did remind you of yourself when you became an avenger. excited, scared, underestimated, all of that. and she begged you to share some mission stories, so you obviously did
“you know, if you stick around for a while, you’re gonna have some cool stories, too. maybe even a kickass costume.”
“oh! a costume, ive got that sorta covered. check it out. a burkini, muslim women wear it for swimming and stuff. my mom got it for me”
“love it. soon we’ll find you a fitting name and update the suit, but seriously, this was the perfect way to go. you look great”
“you think so? i don’t know if i feel that cool. maybe i should try something else?”
“if that’s how you feel, you don’t have to stick to it. you can experiment all you want! but i really think you did awesome on this. come on, pose with me! and hey, i like your pins.”
at this point, you’d do anything for kamala, she reminded you so much of yourself. you would have killed for a mentor your age back in the day.
natasha was in fact tiny dancer...called it
“oh, god, y/n. you’re all grown up...im sorry we left you alone. but if it makes you feel better, i always kept an eye on you”
“well, i kind of took on a protégé...she’s like your grand-protégé. kam, c’mere”
after thor finally came back, everyone started fighting again and ditched, it felt so familiar. but you couldn’t leave kamala behind, you swore to yourself that you couldn’t do that.
she was so good for this team
MODOK was defeated (by kamala herself) but there was so much left to do, tons of threats to extinguish, training to accomplish
“y/n, tony won’t turn his dad rock off! he overrode the speakers in my room”
“oh, it’s on. get chastity’s fabric dye and bleach pens. we’re gonna start some trouble”
she gave you a high five one time and nearly broke your arm
sending each other tiny hand memes
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“hey, ms. m, how’re your parents? doing okay without their favorite super-daughter?”
“my abu doesn’t stop texting me actually, says my family is super proud of me. it’s a nice change of pace”
you take her on covert missions for field training, it was Educational(tm)
*elevator music playing* “so...what do you want for dinner? i was thinking we could ask thor to barbecue”
sleepovers in her room that just turn into her showing you her superhero merch, listening to music, prank lists, sneaking off to the HARM room for hand-to-hand combat training and power experiments, thinking up new costume designs
“tip: you always need backup suits, you never know what you’re gonna run into out there. one time tony pushed me into a tower of paint cans and they spilled all over me. steve yelled at him for two hours afterwards. worst mission ever, except steve said ‘motherfucker’ and i have never recovered from the emotions of that day”
“wow, i wish i could have been there for that”
“don’t worry, kami, you’ll see some crazy ‘team bonding’ along the way”
she geeks out about captain marvel sometimes
“hey, i’ve got a book carol gave to me about ‘teens taking responsibility.’ you wanna read it?”
“is it any good?”
“i don’t know, i only read the first two pages”
you ended up having a true heart-to-heart with her after one mission when she made a mistake that nearly cost you guys the mission. you told her that not every mission is going to go perfect, each avenger had slipped up in the field, and she had just started, shes not going to be perfect
“i am literally always here if you need anything. i know what it feels like to be a teenager among legends, but trust me, you’ve made it this far and you’ve proven how much of a badass you are. i know you can take anything that gets thrown at you”
kamala said she makes vegan nachos and yeah she makes vegan nachos
you guys have to hide from the rest of the team when she makes them bc they eat ALL OF THEM
gaff (the SHEILD vendor) has you test his gear, you recommend gear to kamala
you were so excited to guide kamala on her journey of heroism
taglist: @ravenmoore14 // @purpleskiesstorm //
180 notes · View notes
ampmiscfiles · 3 years ago
Text
Let Us Love You
Chapter 10: It's all so confusing
Peter sighed as he looked at the large form of Thor sitting on a rooftop as he swung by. Ever since the run-in with him at Jessica's the man had taken to waiting for him, out in the open, a few hours every other night.
He had a strong suspicion this was Jessica's doing.
The god never tried to initiate contact, but it didn't stop Peter from feeling the man's gaze.
Jessica was another issue entirely. The two hadn't spoken in over two weeks, and Peter was both upset and not by it.
He had lost his friends in his old world, so it bothered him to not be speaking to one of them here. Things with Jessica though, things were uncomfortable.
Yes, everyone had been trying, both subtly and outright, to convince him there was nothing wrong with these Avengers. If he was honest, even Thor's dedication to simply making himself openly available to talk, was hard to ignore.
Still, it was hard for him. Every time he saw them, all the memories of his dead friends and family came to the forefront of his mind.
No one in this world understood what he went through, because they never had to. They never had to watch as Black Widow gunned one of them down. Never had to watch as Iron Man's repulor blast cleared out an entire area of Xavier's mutants. Never had to watch Captain America beat someone down and damn near cut them in half with his shield. Never saw one of Hawkeye's exploding arrows hit a friend in the chest and blow them to pieces. Never had to watch a torchered and provoked Hulk be made to wreck havock through entire parts of the city. Never watched Thor raise his hammer to ultimately turn fellow fighters to ash.
None of them had seen it. None of them knew the overwhelming scent of burnt flesh and blood as bodies lay out on the street until they were finally cleaned up by those in service to the Avengers to keep their families safe.
Peter lifted his mask over his nose as he landed on a rooftop. He squeezed his eye shut, desperately trying to remove the images from his mind.
"Spidey?"
Peter's head shot up at the voice.
"De-Deadpool? You just love to tempt fate don't you? How many times are you going to keep coming back for punishment? They told you not to." Peter groaned.
"Yeah, because threats like that always work on me." the merc smirked. "Anyway, what are you doing on this fine night?"
"Trying to pretend my life isn't in shambles."
"Bold of you to assume it's just your life in shambles. I mean, mine's not, but others probably are."
"You're really terrible at this. Has anyone ever told you that?" Peter huffed.
"Either they're not listening or I don't get that far." Wade shrugged. "That's why you're always my favorite. Every version of you let's me finish."
Peter rolled his eyes as he sat down on the roof ledge, letting his legs dangle.
"Take a seat Dr. Phil."
Wade squealed happily as he plopped down next to him.
"Tell me your problems Petey-Pie."
"I think I need a break." Peter sighed.
"The Amazing Spider-Man, taking a break? Blasphamy!" Wade gasped, placing a hand on his chest.
Peter chuckled as he looked back out over the city.
"I need to get away from here for a bit. Clear my head some."
"Ahhhhh, I see."
Peter raised an eyebrow.
"Why do I get the feeling you really don't?"
"Oh but I do, my sassy little spider. I often like to take breaks from places."
"I get the feeling it's more like you fleeing the scene of a crime."
"Petey!" Wade tsked, shaking his finger. "I never flee, I simply make a calculated retreat."
"Thats one way of putting it." Peter laughed.
The two were quiet as the sounds of the city filled the pause in conversation.
"Tell you what, baby boy," Wade grinned. "Let me make a proposal."
"You have my interest." Peter replied with surprisingly little hesitation.
"You see Sweetie-Petey, I'm what you call, a collector of residencies."
"Meaning?"
"I have safe houses everywhere." Wade smirked proudly. "So, how about a little vacation to one?"
"As great as that actually sounds, I still have things to take care of here." Peter sighed.
"I'll make a deal with you my bootylicious spider. I'll loan you out a safe house in San Fransisco, and you let me stay at your place here."
"I have so many questions." Peter said, raising his eyebrows.
"I have so many answers." Wade answered proudly.
"Ok, if you have so many safe houses, why do you need to stay at mine? What are you getting out of it?"
"My safe house here in the city is currently unavailable."
"What do you mean by 'unavailable'?"
"A burnt out husk of a building." Wade shrugged.
"What?" Peter shouted.
"Some rando decided to pick a fight with me. Me! I never did anything to this guy!"
"Really now?" Peter asked skeptically.
"Yes! I never touched him, I killed his boss!" Wade exclaimed, throwing his hands up in exasperation.
"You're right. I can't understand why he'd go after you." Peter deadpanned.
"Exactly!"
"Anyway," Peter sighed.
"Yeah, so, I have some things to take care of around town and need a place to crash. So, you get one of mine while I get yours."
"Tell me why you want to send me to San Francisco first."
Wade grinned, the mischievousness showing clearly even through his mask.
"I think there's someone there you might find interesting."
"I can't imagine that's true."
"Petey, Petey, Petey. You forget I know more about this world than you. I also know things about your old world. Trust me, theres someone very interesting in San Fran."
Peter frowned. He didn't know anyone in his old world that lived in San Francisco, so why would he know anyone here? Still, the idea of getting away from New York for a bit actually appealed to him greatly. He could worry about Deadpool's mystery person later.
"Alright. You got me. Deal." Peter said, holding out his hand.
"You're gonna love it!" Wade cheered, eagerly shaking Peter's hand. "I think it's gonna be a very educational trip for you Baby Boy."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I'm gonna level with you Petey," Wade said, removing his mask and whistling as he looked around Peter's apartment. "This is way nicer than my place was."
"I hope it stays that way." Peter warned.
"I respect my friends belongings Peter." Wade huffed.
Chuckling, Peter made his way to his bedroom, pausing at the door and turning with a glare.
"Wait, are you sending me to a shit hole Wade Wilson?"
"What? No!" Wade scoffed. "My San Fran pad is awesome. You're gonna love it. It's also safe for you if you go into heat while there. I got that place set for anything."
"Why do you have that? You're not even affected by this world."
"I have to blend in Petey."
"Then why not be an alpha? You're certainly built for it."
"Are you trying to seduce me, Mr. Parker?" Wade smirked, batting his eyes.
"You wish." Peter said, crossing his arms.
"Oh how I do." Wade swooned.
"Anyway, I just wanted to. I loved the look on the faces of the guys who came to install the security. Priceless." Wade laughed. “Also, omega security systems are the best and I need my places secure when I’m not here.”
Peter shook his head with a smile as he went into his room and started gathering his things into a bag. He was planning to catch an early flight tomorrow.
"Anyone I should let know of your wherabouts?" Wade asked, leaning against the doorframe.
Peter paused. On one hand, he didn't want anyone to worry, but he also liked the idea of being completely unreachable. Still, at least one person needed to know.
"I'll send Matt a text. Just let him know I'm on vacation and not to worry."
"Would you like me to send it now, Peter?"
"What the hell was that?" Wade shouted, jumping and looking around.
Peter laughed loudly as Wade continued to search for the source of the voice.
"Relax, Wade. It's just GWEN. She's running my apartment as well now. She's no longer confined to the suit and phone."
"I'm watching you, Wilson.” GWEN replied, her voice sounding both smug and mischievous.
"Of course, I should have known I'd get a Parker with to much free time to use that brain." Wade muttered. "So, is she gonna be spying on me?"
"Keeping an eye on you is more like it." Peter smirked. "GWEN opporates from everywhere. If you get into trouble, I'll know. If you trash my place, I'll know."
"I got it. Geeze. No faith Baby Boy." Wade grumbled, watching Peter pack.
"Do you wear scent blockers in here?" Wade suddenly asked.
"No. The patches tend to itch so I only wear them when I'm out. Why?"
Wade grinned widely.
"Just asking."
"I don't like that look or tone." Peter's eyes narrowed.
"To late to back out now Peter Pumpkin!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I’ll let Matt know I’m out of the city and my place is taken care of. If anything goes wrong, if you’re at the apartment have GWEN call me, otherwise, here.”
Peter paused, pulling out his phone.
“Put your number, for the phone I know you have here, in my phone so we can keep in touch if you can’t access GWEN.”
“Oooohhhh! So we’re swapping numbers now, Petey-Pie? Don’t you think you’re moving a little fast? I’m a classy lady.” Wade gasped in false shyness from under his hoodie.
“You walked out of my bathroom completely naked and strutted around my apartment last night. Shy isn’t in your dictionary and now we’re way past the stage of swapping numbers, Wade Wilson.” Peter said flatly.
“You could have joined me in naked solidarity you know.” Wade pouted.
“No, and you’ll never make me believe any other version of myself would either.”
“Oh, you’d be surprised.” Wade winked.
Peter felt a blush slid across his face.
“I gotta go.” He said, shaking himself out of his embarrassment.
“Enjoy your vacation Petey!” Wade grinned.
“Wait! Who am I supposed to be looking for?”
“Oh, don’t worry about that. You’ll figure it out.”
Peter huffed as Wade just continued to grin, clearly enjoying Peter’s frustration.
Turning on his heel, Peter marched further into the airport, ignoring Wade’s snickers behind him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“You’re wearing your upset dad face, and since Jack is sleeping, it must be Peter.” Karen smiled as Matt walked into the bedroom.
“Kid just up and took a vacation.”
“He left New York?” Karen asked in surprise. “Where did he go?”
“I don’t know.” Matt grumbled. “He only sent a text telling me he was ‘going on vacation’ and that his ‘apartment was taken care of’.”
“Maybe Danny or Luke are checking it. Did he ever start speaking to Jess again?”
“No. He’s maintaining radio silence with her. Luke and Danny both said it’s bothering her a lot, despite how much she denies it.”
“Thor?”
“Still offering himself up every other night. I’ll give him points for dedication.” Matt sighed, sitting down on the bed.
Jacks soft little snores filled the silence as Karen laid her head on his shoulder.
“They’re all adults. I’ve given up worrying about it, so don’t you start.” Karen giggled. “Peter will be fine.”
“To tell you the truth, the vacation is what’s bothering me. Where is he going and why so suddenly. That’s not like him.”
“I’m sure he’d tell you if he was in trouble. Maybe he really did just want a vacation.”
“I don’t know. I just have a off feeling. There’s more to this story.”
Karen sighed with smile.
“Why don’t you go by his apartment at some point? Just give it a check.”
Matt groaned as he laid back in the mattress.
“I’ll give it a day or so. Like you said, Peter is an adult.”
Karen chuckled.
“I give you less that 24hrs. I’m only being that generous because I don’t know your schedule now.”
“Now I can’t go on principle.” Matt smirked at her.
“Of course.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Any word from Peter?" Sam asked, sliding onto a stool in front of Luke.
"Nothing. Kid's went completely awol on us. Didn't even let Matt know where he was, only that he was leaving for a while." Luke grumbled, cleaning the counter a little harder than necessary
"How are those alphas of yours holding up?"
"Out of their minds." Sam groaned. "They claim to keep catching hints of Peter's scent while out, but they never find him. I think they're delusional. Peter never goes out without blockers on."
"Alphas don't tend to mistake the scent of their mates, Wilson." Luke hummed with narrowed eyes. "Maybe me and the others should check in on Pete's place."
"No one has seen Spider-Man in three weeks, and you guys haven't seen Peter. I don't think you'll find anything by dropping by, unless you really think he's just been hiding out at home." Sam frowned.
"I think it-"
"It's Spider-Man!" a voice yelled out.
Luke and Sam's heads shot up to see the entire bar looking up at the TV. Turning up the volume, they watched as Spider-Man flipped through the air, giving a wave to the people watching, before swinging out of sight.
"And San Fransisco gives another thanks to New York for loaning out their web slinging hero! The vigilante has been seen working alongside the mysterious creature thats been roaming our streets, taking care of criminals, the last three years. The two have been spotted several times at major incidents, taking care of things before local law can even show up. We don't know what brought Spider-Man to San Fransisco, but it's obvious the citizens here are loving it."
"Has Spidey abandoned us?" Someone asked.
"No way!" Another shouted. "Not for some place like San Fransisco!"
The bar erupted into laughter as the news broadcast changed to another story.
"San Fransisco." Luke sighed. "What's he thinking?"
"I better get back to the tower." Sam grumbled. "No doubt this news isn't going over well."
"Wouldn't it be better to stay here then?" Luke asked with a raised brow.
"No. Bruce is to timid when their alpha instincts kick in and Clint will only encourge them. I have to go be the real voice of reason. Wish me luck."
"Have a good time!"
Sam grumbled as Luke's laughter followed him out into the night.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
3 weeks earlier
Peter whistled as he walked into Wade's San Fransisco safe house.
The merc hadn't lied.
The place was enormous and decked out with the highest quality furniture and appliances.
"This might not be such a bad deal after all." Peter grinned, looking at everything as he rolled his suitcase towards the bedroom.
"I think this vacation will be good for you, Peter."
GWEN's voice sang from his phone.
"I'm anxious to get to explore the city. Or are you not planning on be Spider-Man while here?"
"I don't know. Spider-Man has never been out of New York, so I don't know if I want to let anyone know I'm here. I am supposed to be on vacation."
"Are you planning to try and figure out the mystery person Wade discussed?"
"I don't even know if I want to." Peter sighed. "With Wade, I think that could go so many ways."
"What ever you decide Peter. I have no stakes in it regardless."
"Wow. Thanks GWEN."
"You're welcome."
Peter could swear he could hear the smirk.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After getting settled in, Peter checked the fridge. Given the fact Wade wasn't there very often, he wasn't surprised to find it empty.
"Well, looks like I gotta go do some shopping. Not the same as webslinging, but I'll pretend I'm vloging so you can see the city from foot. Sound good?" Peter asked, pulling out his phone and activating the camera.
"Yes!" GWEN cheered.
Peter grinned as he made sure he had his wallet and keys and left the apartment.
He was in no way knowledgable about the city of San Fransisco, so he had no real idea of where he was going. Still, he had offered up a tour to GWEN, so he wasn't going to back out. He could find a grocery store close to the apartment later.
No one paid his any attention as he walked down the street with his phone up and camera angled out. If the large amount of other people doing the exact same thing was any indication, there was nothing at all strange about Peter.
"I should create a virtual form."
GEWN said idily as Peter sat down at a table for a small outdoor cafe. He made sure to sit as far from the other customers as he could.
"Then I would be able to talk to you more frequently."
"Have at it." Peter agreed.
GWEN went quiet as, Peter assumed, she began construction of her new form.
While he waited, he placed his order and watched people pass by. By the time he got his food, his phone screen flickered to life, and the image of a girl filled the screen.
Peter blinked in stunned surprise. The girl on his screen was beautiful. Her shiny blonde hair was straight and hung just below her shoulders. Her bright blue eyes seemed to hold an amused sparkle. Her cheeks were pink, a little noticeable against her pale skin, while her lips where full and red.
"Hello, Peter."
"GWEN?" Peter balked.
"What do you think?" she asked, a hand coming up to toss her hair over her shoulder.
"I think you outdid yourself."
"I'll take that an extreme approval."
"How did you even-"
"I scoured the internet and picked features I liked and compiled them together. Pick your chin up lover boy."
Peter snorted as he took a large bite of his hamburger while GWEN giggled.
"Now, I've been looking up places to visit while we're here. How long are we planning on staying?"
Peter frowned. He hadn't really thought that far.
"I guess I'll need to call Wade and ask him how long he'll need my apartment. We'll go back when he needs to leave."
"Then I suggest we make the most of our time since we don't know how much we have. Although I don't know why it matters. I'm observing the apartment at all times. I can keep it on lockdown when he leaves."
"I don't know. While this already feels great, I do miss Matt and the others." Peter frowned slightly.
"What about your 'cousin'?" GWEN smirked.
"Yeah," Peter grumbled in obvious defeat. "I do miss her, too."
"What about the Aven-"
"No." Peter growled. "I came here to get away from that headache. I do not miss them."
GWEN was silent for a moment.
"I think we should discuss this later, Peter."
Peter's eyebrows shot up.
"What do you mean, 'discuss this'?"
"I can access anything on the internet, Peter. My job is to protect you, and I can't do that if I don't know as much as I can about the world around you."
"Don't you start GWEN. I just got everyone else off my case about this whole alpha thing."
GWEN huffed in annoyance.
"I honestly don't care about everyone else, Peter. I only care about you."
Peter took another bite of his food, worry over GWEN's increasing autonomy on his mind.
"Can we just enjoy today at least?" Peter sighed.
"Of course! I already have an itenerary!" GWEN smiled widely.
Peter chuckled with a shake of his head and finished his lunch.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The sun had set as Peter made his way back. GWEN was scanning for a supermarket close by when a sound reached his ears.
It was the obvious sounds of a fight, but both the shouts and heart beats were far to panicked to be normal.
Shoving his phone in his pocket, Peter took off towards where the sounds were coming from.
He ran down an empty alley, coming out into an abandoned building. HIs spider-sense flared as a body flew towards his from the darkness of the building.
The man was badly beaten, and it didn't sound like the others inside where fairing any better.
Stealing himself for a confrontation, Peter made his way in with caution.
He was completely unprepared for what he found.
The group of men were obviously ciminals is the vast amount of clearly stolen cargo was any indication. However, they weren't what surprised him. What shocked him completely was the large being taking them out with ease.
"Venom?" Peter gasped.
The large form turned to glance at him before turning back to the men and taking them out, before biting their heads off.
Peter gagged as blood covered the ground. He had never seen his own Venom feast on anyone.
He was so engrossed in his shock, he almost missed the creatures approach.
"Who are you? You're not one of theirs."
Peter glared, preparing himself for a fight.
"No, I'm not, but I can't let you just leave here either."
"They are criminals."
"You killed them."
"They will not be missed."
Sadly, in a place he desperately tried to ignore as a hero, Peter couldn't really argue that logic. Possible family members might miss them, but the community as a large wouldn't.
But that wasn't how heroes thought. They should have had to pay for their crimes in the legal way.
As Peter made to attack, he stopped.
It was quiet.
His spider-sense was quiet.
It was quiet.....around Venom.
"Who, who are you?" Peter frowned.
"You identified us. I think we should be asking you the questions." Venom hissed.
Peter's eyes narrowed at the obvious threat. While the Avengers had been the real villains of his world, Peter had had his fair share of run-ins with Venom as well.
Suddenly, it clicked. This was who Deadpool had wanted him to meet.
"Eddie?" Peter spoke slowly.
Venom jerked before moving to tower over Peter, but Peter was used to this tactic. He wasn't going to cower.
Breaking the tension, the sound of police sirens filled the air around them.
Growling, Venom jumped over him and disappeared into the night.
Peter fell back against the wall of the building. He had just watched Venom take out a group of criminals, bite off their heads, then just.....leave. He didn't try to fight or hurt him.
"No." Peter whispered. "Not him."
"Not who, Peter? I can't see anything."
"GWEN," Peter said, stumbling out of the building. "GPS our location and get us back to the apartment."
"You haven't gotten any groceries, Peter. I can hear the distress in your voice. You will regret it tomorrow if you don't get things tonight."
Peter knew what she meant. He could already feel his desire to sight-see tomorrow leaving him.
Following GWEN's directions, Peter gathered a few things he'd need and headed back to Wade's apartment before the police arrived.
How could the merc have just sent him here like this? No warning? It was obvious Venom and Eddie are who he wanted him to see.
'I  think it's gonna be a very educational trip for you Baby Boy.'
Peter was going to kill him.
Was he suggesting that Venom wasn't a villain here either?
Peter groaned as he fell onto the soft bed. Lifting his head slightly, he pulled off the scent blockers, frowning at the puckered skin around them.
Maybe he should try to figure out a formula that will work just as well, without irritating his sensitive skin.
Anything was better than considering the fact the Eddie Brock and Venom weren't the same as back in his world.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was a week later before Eddie Brock and Peter Jones crossed paths.
The two made eye contact and quickly tried to decide if they should speak or pretend they didn't see each other.
In the end, Eddie figured he had the most to lose if they didn't talk and approached him.
"We probably shouldn't talk out in the street. Anywhere we can go thats not so public, or at least where we're unlikely to be heard?" Peter asked.
Eddie nodded, leading him into a rather lively restaurant and bar. The two made thier way towards the least crowded section, out of earshot of anyone there.
"Figured this would be mutual ground." Eddie said, grabbing a menu. "I'm starving anyway."
Peter nodded in agreement, picking up his own menu and studying it.
The two sat in an odd silence as they waited for the waitress to take their order. After she left, Eddie leaned over the table.
"How?"
"Do you just attack anyone?"
Eddie blinked in surprise before glaring at him.
"No. I've made it very clear that criminals are it. I don't like it, but I can't exactly stop him when hes in control. Boundaries are the best I can do."
Peter raised an eyebrow at the honest admission.
"Now, how did you know?"
Peter sighed. His spider-sense was still silent.
"It's a long story....."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eddie fell back in his seat with wide eyes as Peter finished his story.
"I want so bad to call bullshit, but I'm literally carrying around an alien and super humans walk the earth. So, sure, yeah, alternate universes. Why not?"
"Alternate universes. That's all you got from that?"
"I'd really rather ignore the whole villain story of your world since it doesn't apply in this one."
"Well.....your methods don't really label you as a hero...."
"We prefer the term, antihero." Eddie snorted. "At least, it's the closest word I can use to describe us at this point."
Peter nodded.
"How....how do you handle the local law enforcement? I can't imagine they're to happy with you."
"Yeah, that's uh, that's a bit of a long story. Acquiring Venom led to a bit of a problem, resulting in a fight with the cops and ending in a battle with an actually evil symbiote and the explosion of a space probe owned by the Life Foundation."
Peter stared at him with wide eyes.
"How did I not read anything about that in the papers? Surely that was world news?"
"It happened before you came here. I've had Venom a while now."
Peter ran a hand down his face. This Eddie was nothing like the angry man Peter had meet in his own world. This Eddie was a man trying to balance out his life while also having to placate his aggressive symbiotic partner. Even more baffling was the fact Venom actually listened to Eddie's conditions!
"If you're feeling up to it, we can go back to my place and you can officially meet him." Eddie offered.
Peter carefully considered his choice. HIs spider-sense hadn't pinged for either Eddie or Venom. It was strange. When it had remained silent around the Avengers, he had worried it was messing up, but it was working properly every other time.
Maybe this would be fine. Even if it wasn't, it wouldn't be his first fight with Venom.
"Alright."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Peter was surprised by Eddie's small, and rather dirty apartment.
After finding out he was in San Fransisco, Peter had looked into him. Eddie was now a rather successful journalist. How was he living in a place like this?
As if reading his mind, Eddie answered.
"Venom can get a little.....rowdy."
It was then that Peter noticed the various patches in the walls.
"This has to be one of the weirdest things I've ever done." Peter shook his head. "I literally fought you many times, yet here I am, in your apartment, willingly talking you and-"
It was then that Venom appeared on Eddie's shoulder.
"Your world sounded fun."
Peter raised his eyebrows at Venom's pleased voice.
"Sounds like there were lots of people to fight. Sounds like I was feared."
"Don't get ahead of yourself." Peter huffed. "You were hardly a threat compared to the Avengers posed."
"Lies! "
Peter just could not get over the petulant tone in the symbiote's voice.
"Sorry, Venom." Peter smirked. "You were definitely a force to be reckoned with, but you just weren't bad enough."
"Well, at least Eddie wasn't a pussy."
"We're still a work in progress." Eddie grimaced. "The first time he ever bit the head of a guy, I was pretty sure I was gonna be sick forever."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"That was a rather interesting visit." GWEN stated as they walked back into Wade's apartment.
He had agreed to meet back up with Eddie again after he finished up with a story he was working on.
It was bizarre just how different the two Eddie Brocks were.
"Yeah." Peter agreed.
"Don't you think it's weird how he was a villain in your world, but not exactly one here? I mean, no, he's far from hero status, but he is technically out there fighting crime."
"Yeah." Peter said again.
"Peter?"
"Sorry, GWEN. I'm just thinking about how....kind of...nice it was to talk to them. Is that weird?"
"I don't know why it would be. It's someone else with a secret identity. You can relate on that front. Are you worried about how easy you found it to accept him?"
Peter winced.
That's exactly what he was worried about.
Venom had hurt him multiple times, yet seeing him here hadn't even phased him outside of just surprise.
"He wasn't like them." Peter hushed. "He wasn't as bad as they were."
"Peter?"
"He wasn't, GWEN!" Peter shouted, standing up and pacing.
"I'm not sure what you mean, Peter?"
"Venom! He wasn't as bad as the Avengers!"
"No one said he was. No one was even talking about them."
"Don't think I don't know what this is." Peter growled.
"This is some stupid attempt on Wade's part, for whatever reason I can't fathom, to push me towards the stupid Avengers!"
"Peter, Wade isn't from this world. I highly doubt he cares about your relationship status."
"Then why push me here?"
"From what I can gather of Wade Wilson, he thought it would be amusing." GWEN replied flatly.
Peter scoffed, although fully believing it to be true.
"What an asshole."
"Well, what's your plan now?"
Peter sighed, sitting back down. He hadn't heard from Wade as far as how much longer he needed the apartment, so, aside from waiting around to talk to Eddie and Venom at least once more, he didn't really have any plans.
"I don't know. What would you like to do?"
"I have an idea."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Peter whooped loudly as he flew through the air.
San Fransisco wasn't the same as New York, but navigating with the help of GWEN was allowing him to get the best view of the city.
"I gotta say GWEN, I'm glad I let you talk me into bringing the suit."
"Glad I could help. Anyway, this is my favorite way to sight-see."
Peter grinned as he could hear the pleased tone in GWEN's voice.
"Well, anything we can help with?"
"I'll need a moment to tap into the police line."
"In the meantime, how about we stop that mugging over there?"
"Sounds good to me."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Peter grinned as he sat down on the edge of a rooftop. So far, his night had been going great. Being in a new city and not constantly looking over his shoulder was kind of refreshing.
"You seem to be enjoying yourself."
"Yeah." Peter replied. "It's been great. I feel free to move and work without worry."
"Unless Tony Stark suddenly has a business meeting here."
He could hear the mischievousness in GWEN's voice.
"Do you want to be deactivated?"
"Like you could live without me now." GWEN scoffed.
Peter sighed. He really had come to depend on the AI for both company and information.
"Anyway, considering the fact the police scanner is reporting various broken up crimes that weren't yours, I'm guessing someone else is on the move."
"Any...um..."
"Two."
"Great." Peter sighed. "Let's go join the, hopefully, less bloody fun."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Present
Sam took a deep breath as he rode the elevator up.
"How bad is it FRI?"
"I have muted the sound and have just been observing body language."
"Great." Sam sighed as the elevator stopped and the doors opened.
He heard the yelling before he saw anyone.
"How long has he really been gone?" Tony's frustrated voice rang out. "How are we only just now figuring this out?"
"I was only instructed to keep track of Spider-Man in the news." FRIDAY's equally frustrated sounding voice replied.
"I know I caught his scent the other day though." Steve frowned.
"Have none of you even bothered to think that was odd?" Natasha asked, rolling her eyes.
"What do you mean?" Steve asked, looking at her.
"She means that we've never smelt Peter out before. He always wears scent blockers. Why are we smelling him now?" Bucky answered.
"It is most strange." Thor frowned.
"So, what? You're trying to say someone out there is wearing Peter's scent?" Tony hushed.
"Or has at least been around it." Natasha nodded.
"How? According to the news, Peter's been in San Fransisco three weeks." Steve said, eyebrows furrowing.
"Well, someone's been in his space." Bucky said, crossing his arms.
Sam stood off to the side, watching the five alphas grumble in front of him. He was honestly surprised by Tony's self control at not keeping tabs on Peter possibly leaving the city. With FRIDAY as his disposal, he could have easily done so by keeping watch of security feeds.
Good job, Tony.
"I should have realized this sooner." Thor shook his head. "I haven't seen him out in many nights."
"We don't exactly monitor his every move and Spider-man or Peter." Steve said, patting Thor on the shoulder.
"No, I mean to say I have not seen him during my nights."
"What nights?" Tony asked, narrowing his eyes in suspicion.
"By suggestion of Lady Jones, I have been making myself available to our mate by placing myself out in the open as a way of showing I am not a threat and nearly wish to speak. I have been offering an invitation at his choice. I see him often, but we have yet to make actual contact, despite the fact he knows I am there."
The room burst into noise again.
"Alright, I think we all need to cool it." Sam sighed, finally speaking up.
The alphas turning to him in surprise as they had not noticed him enter.
"So Pete took a little vacation, nothing wrong with that."
"Who knows when he'll come back." Steve frowned.
"If he'll come back." Bucky grumbled.
"Three weeks!" Tony said, throwing up his hands.
"Pete?" Natasha asked, her eyes narrowing in her own suspicion. "Since when did you start calling him 'Pete'?"
Sam stumbled a moment, not having noticed his slip. Of course Natasha would.
"I-"
"Have something you wanna share with the class, Wilson?" Tony glared, crossing his arms.
"I can give nicknames too, Stark." Sam huphed. "That doesn't change what I said though. He's allowed to take a vacation."
"But he didn't really." Natasha shrugged. "Not really in his nature to."
"It isn't in yours either." Sam responded.
"Barton doesn't seem to have any issues." Tony pouted.
"Barton has a family, Tony." Sam deadpanned. "What, did he leave while I was gone?"
"As soon as the new aired."
Sam turned as Bruce exited the elevator, his face looking tired already.
"How'd you get left behind?"
"He couldn't find me. I got the message he looked for me."
"Nice." Sam sighed.
"Fine. Barton bailed. Let's revisit you nicknaming our omega." Tony grumbled.
"Pete is hardly a nickname though." Sam said, rolling his eyes. "It's literally just his name, missing one letter."
The alphas studied him closely, as if trying to unlock all his secrets.
"How long have you been seeing him behind our backs?"
Everyone's head shot up to look between Sam and Natasha.
"Look, I don't know where you're getting the idea-"
"You might as well spill, Sam." Steve warned.
"I hav-"
"How long Bruce?" Natasha asked, turning her sights towards the flustered scientist.
"Why wold Bruce know...Brucie Bear!" Tony gasped. "Is that why you've been avoiding me? I thought it was over the lab-"
"I am angry about the lab!" Bruce defended.
"But that's not the real reason you've been avoiding Tony." Bucky said, turning towards him.
"Enough!"
Everyone turned in surprise as Thor's commanding voice rang out.
"The Lady Jessica told me to make myself available and let our omega come to me. Allow him to do it on his own terms. Me must respect his decision to leave, as much as it pains us to do so. I have no doubt he will return as his friends remain here."
"Wow. I came back here expecting to be the voice of reason." Sam smirked. "Turns out you didn't need me at all."
"That does not excuse your secrecy." Thor said, shooting Sam a pointed look. "It would have been nice to know that one of our own was looking after him when we have not yet been able to."
There was silence in the room as everyone gathered their composure.
"Ok, so, Pete's on break." Tony said, throwing a look at Sam. "That still doesn't explain why his scent has been around."
"We've been allowing it to pass." Steve said, straightening up. "We've been doing as we should by keeping our distance and letting Peter live his life and adjust, but something is happening without his knowledge. If he's not here, someone has been around his things at least."
"So, what? Are you guys just gonna track whoever it is-"
"That's exactly what we're gonna do." Steve nodded. "We've been making sure Peter is well from afar by checking in with The Defenders periodically, but if someone has overstepped their bounds, then they need to be dealt with. It's obvious that whoever this is has been inside Peter's home. That's the only way the scent could still be around."
"So, I guess we're on patrol." Bucky raised an eyebrow.
"This should be fun. Haven't patrolled for someone inside the city for a long time." Natasha smirked.
"Right." Steve nodded. "We start tomorrow."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"We're lucky Thor stepped up." Bruce said as he shut Sam's bedroom door behind him. "They were about to tear us apart."
"He could have at least given us a heads up." Sam huphed. "I mean, we knew Peter went dark, but no one knew he went out of town dark."
"Where's he been staying? Surely he hasn't spent three weeks in a hotel." Bruce frowned in concern.
"No. He's gotten a place there or something."
"Maybe he really isn't planning on coming back then." Bruce sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "They were doing so good at giving him space, despite the obvious strain it was putting on them. This could be disastrous."
"Someone knew he left." Sam said sternly. "My bet would be Murdock. He may not have known where exactly, but he had to have known Peter was leaving."
"I thought they were talking to Karen?"
"If Matt told her not to say anything, she's not going to. Play, they have the new pup. Karen's barely speaking to them right now because she's busy."
Bruce nodded, looking out the window at the city.
"Yeah, Matt probably did know. Brave man to allow himself to be put in that position."
"Murdock's a lawyer. He knows how to hold a poker face." Sam chuckled. "The others will kill him though if they find out he knew Peter was leaving and didn't tell them."
"You don't think they've been smelling Matt, do you?" Bruce asked, looking at Sam. "Maybe he's been going over to check on Peter's place?"
"Maybe." Sam shrugged. "But I'm not saying anything. We don't know for sure and I'm not gonna be responsible for that ambush."
"I agree."
"I feel sorry for the poor sap though, whoever he is."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Wade walked down the street with a little bounce in his step. Peter's oversized hoodie was probably one of them most comfortable pieces of clothing he had ever worn.
He wondered if Peter would notice if it went missing.
Probably.
Still, he'd enjoy it while he could.
Passing by an alley, he stopped. Out the other side he could see the sign for his favorite ice cream shop.
"I've got some time." Wade smiled. "A lady should always treat herself every once and a while."
He was half way into the alley when he stopped.
"This is hardly fair." he pouted, putting his hands up. "I'm not even doing anything yet!"
"You've really outdone yourself this time, Wilson."
Wade turned, the barrel of Bucky Barne's gun staring him in the face.
"Why Sargent, I have no idea what you speak of. I'm simply out enjoying the day!"
"You know what you're doing."
He looked over his shoulder as Natasha dropped down behind him.
"Purposely wearing Peter's clothing. I'm guessing you're the one who sent him on his little trip."
"I just offered by bestie a little break. What's wrong with that?" Wade asked innocently.
"Peter aside, Wade." Steve said, stepping up beside Bucky. "You're wanted by SHIELD. We're taking you in."
"Lame." Wade pouted. "I had plans."
"Plans change." Wade looked up as Iron Man swooped into the alley, repulsers at the ready.
"Aww, come on, you guys don't wanna damage Petey-Pie's hoodie right?"
"Don't push your luck, man." Sam sighed as he landed behind Natasha. "You're already in deep."
"I don't even have all my stuff!" Wade whined. "Petey doesn't need it!"
"Just stop!" Sam groaned in exasperation.
"Let's just wrap this up. Romanov." Tony said, repulsers still at the ready.
"Wha-?" Wade started, reaching to his pocket and grabbing his phone before everything went dark.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
San Fransisco
Peter sat across from Eddie, a checker board between them as Venom watched from Eddie's shoulder.
"I've got you this time." Eddie smirked.
"Dude, I won the last three rounds." Peter smirked.
"Everyone falls at some point, kid."
Peter laughed as Eddie moved a chip. They had been spending a lot of time together, much to GWEN's amusement and disappointment at the lack of more sight-seeing time. Still, she did always enjoy watching Peter engage in a good tumble.
"I don't think it's gonna be this time-" Peter stopped as his phone chimed.
Pulling it out of his pocket, he frowned at the screen.
"Trouble?" Eddie asked, looking up from the board.
"Yeah, but I'm not sure what. The person watching my apartment sent me a blank message. Something feels wrong."
"You have not finished the game." Venom grumbled.
"Sorry V." Peter said, standing up. "I gotta go. I promise I'll come back for a visit."
"Maybe we should drop in on New York some time." Eddie grinned. "Venom's never left the city."
"You'd blend right in with the rest of us." Peter laughed, walking towards the door.
"Hope your friend is good." Eddie said, following him to the door.
"With this guy, who knows."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"What's the word GWEN?" Peter asked as he raced back towards Wade's apartment.
"The Avengers obtained him for SHIELD."
"What? How?"
"Wade has a very twisted sense of humor."
"Tell me something I don't know." Peter snorted, bursting into the apartment and gathering his things.
"He's been roaming the city in any clothing you have that fits."
"What? Why would he-" Peter stopped, his face growing red in anger.
"He's been provoking them! That idiot! He's not even supposed to be here!"
"I suggest we move quickly if we wanna go bail him out."
"Why should I? He brought it on himself." Peter grumbled, continuing to pack anyway.
"Because you like him enough to not want SHIELD to do anything to him."
"There's something wrong with me then."
GWEN just chuckled.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Matt put his phone to his ear, the message playing back.
"Hey Matt. Been a while. Thanks for keeping the secret, at least, I think you have considering no one hunted me down. Anyway, SHIELD has DP so I'm planning a breakout. See you soon!"
Matt sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose as he sat the phone down.
Days like this, he wanted to take his own vacation.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"You know," Wade coughed nervously. "This is rather uncomfortable."
The SHIELD agent remained silent as they activated the collar, now strapped around his neck, before leaving the room. Once they were gone, Steve walked into the room.
"Just one?" Wade asked, still uncomfortable in his current state.
"I'm currently not the one trying to kill you. Well, Thor seems pretty collected, but I'm not sure how good the interrogation would go." Steve shrugged.
"I'm disappointed then. To think I'm only worth one of you."
"You're not much of a threat with that collar on, Wade." Steve sighed. "Now, I'll asked the mandatory questions first, then the personal questions after."
"Oh come on, Stars and Strips! You know you wanna ask about Baby Boy!"
Steve's hands folded into fists, his knuckles turning white as he struggled not to jump across the table.
"How long have you been back?" he grumbled.
"Three weeks!" Wade replied cheerfully. "It's been a great time."
"And what have you been doing?"
"Taking my own vacation! I mean, I had a few recon missions I did, but nothing unsavory, Captain. I promise!"
Steve took a breath.
"You understand you're not getting out of here right? We'll need to know where you've been staying so we can get the rest of your things."
"Uh-uh-uh! Not even America's Ass will make me give up Petey's address."
There was a thump behind the glass observation window to the room, making Wade grin widely.
"We have an audience!"
Steve lowered his face into his hand. This could not get any worse. Yes, this was a SHIELD mission, but it was also breaking their promise not to invade Peter's space. Their alpha instincts didn't want to see their mate upset, but they also couldn't stand the idea of this man being in their mate's space while they knew he flirted with him.
"Glad this choice is on you and not me." Wade said, leading back in his chair.
Steve growled at him before standing up and stalking out the door.
"Well now. That was fun."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Peter swallowed hard as he looked at Avengers Tower. He had never imagined himself returning, much less willingly. Still, he needed to find out where SHILED headquarters were located.
Firing a web, he swung towards the tower, only to shout as the window opened and he tumbled inside.
"Welcome back Mr. Parker." FRIDAY greeted. "Given current circumstances, I expected your arrival and have alerted Dr. Banner. He is the only one currently in the tower."
"Who's she?" GWEN's suspicious voice asked.
"That's FRIDAY. She's Tony Stark's AI. She integrated into the tower. Kinda stole the idea when I made you."
"Are you telling me I'm basically a newer and better model of her?"
"I beg your pardon. I am far more advanced that you could ever hope to be."
Peter stood bewildered as the two AI's began to bicker back and forth.
Peter turned as the elevator opened and a curious Bruce Banner emerged.
"Peter, I-who's FRIDAY arguing with?"
"My AI GWEN. They're having a pissing contest over who's better." Peter sighed.
"You made an AI?" Bruce asked, eyebrows raised.
"Yeah. Say hello to Dr. Bruce Banner, GWEN."
"Hello, Dr. Banner. I've heard a lot about you. If you'll excuse me, I need to finish schooling this grandma on being a real AI."
"You have a long way to go in order to be more efficient than me you infant." FRIDAY's usually cool voice responded.
Peter sighed, placing his phone and mask down on the coffee table and following Bruce towards the kitchen.
"We'll let the girls duke it out." Bruce chuckled.
"I'd laugh if I was 100% sure GWEN couldn't make a physical body at some point."
Bruce jolted to a stop and spun around to face him.
"I hope you're joking."
"As of right this moment, maybe about 60% joking."
"Maybe it's a good thing you're not speaking to Tony." Bruce said, shaking his head.
"Speaking of, where are they?"
"You wouldn't be here if you didn't know they were gone. My guess if you're here to find out where to find Wade."
"Well, you are a smart man Dr. Banner." Peter smirked.
"It's just obvious." Bruce chuckled, pulling out a pen and piece of paper.
"There. Take an unmarked car downstairs. The cars are registered and will open the gates without being checked. Follow the road around to the parking garage. Park in the far back corner on the second floor, It's a blind spot for cameras. There is also a hidden door there which will get you inside. It's close to the holding cells. You'll just have to be careful until you find which one he's in."
"Wow. That's an awful lot of helpful information, Bruce." Peter said, taking the piece of paper.
"Tony's not a big fan of making a public entrance to SHIELD surprisingly. Nat showed us where to go."
"See, this is why you you're my favorite, regardless of whatever Sam thinks of his status."
"I'll be sure to let him know." Bruce laughed. "Maybe we should go break the highly intelligent girl's up now."
When they walked back into the common area to find FRIDAY listing off her various hacking achievements.
"Well, I guess when you're as old as you are, it would be rather embarrassing to have nothing to show for it." GWEN said haughtily.
"When you're as bratty an infant as you are, it would be shameful to expect you even had anything to show."
Peter shared a look with Bruce before moving to the coffee table.
"We need to go GWEN." Peter said, picking up his mask and phone.
"We're not done here, Peter."
"Don't continue to humiliate yourself." FRIDAY replied smugly.
"Peter, don't you dare leave this tower."
"We have to go GWEN." Peter said, not wanting to let FRIDAY overhear where he was going.
"I'll be back you fossil!" GWEN growled.
"Run along a play, child."
GWEN grumbled lowly all the way to the garage and while Peter picked out a car.
"I want to be angry at you, but I'm currently to intrigued by the fact you're stealing a vehicle from Avengers Tower."
"I"m not stealing, I'm borrowing by allowance of Dr. Banner."
"Even better!"
"Wanna talk about your verbal-"
"Beatdown."
"Beatdown, of FRIDAY?" Peter asked, pulling out of the garage and heading to where Bruce told him to go.
"I did win that round, Peter." GWEN huffed indignantly.
"Sure."
"I did."
The two were quiet as they drove.
"I hope we make it before they move him." GWEN suddenly spoke.
"Where would they move him?"
"Considering his mutant classification and high risk label, my guess would be a place called The Ice Box."
"What the hell is that?"
"It's a containment facility. It's highly classified. I'd like to see FRIDAY get that intel."
Peter snickered.
"Hey GWEN, if they transferred Wade there, what are the odds of getting him out?"
"It wouldn't be worth trying, Peter."
The silence returned.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"This is it."
Peter said, looking out the windshield as the massive building ahead of him. They had been driving a few hours and it was well past dark.
"Are you ready for this, Peter?"
"As ready as I'll ever be." Peter puffed out a breath. "Wade is gonna owe me big time"
Following Bruce's instructions, Peter made his way to the second floor parking spot. Taking breath, he slipped his mask on.
"This is it GWEN. It's now or never."
"Let's go get that idiot."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Peter made his way slowly down the halls, careful of the cameras. He couldn't afford to be caught before he even found Wade.
GWEN kept a running log of their progress in order to aid in a swift exit later.
The sound of coughing gave Peter pause outside of a room. Looking in the small window, Peter gasped at the slumped form of his.....friend?
Yeah.
Friend.
Why not at this point?
Trying the knob, he wasn't surprised to find it locked. Taking a look back into the window, he scanned for cameras. There was only on in the far corner. It swiveled from side to side. If he moved at the right time, he could get in without being seen and disable it. It wouldn't give them long, since surly someone would be monitoring the camera feed, but maybe long enough to get Wade out.
Waiting for the camera to turn, Peter smashed the locked knob and dashed into the room, shutting the door behind him and moving into a blind spot. Snapping a web to cover the screen, he turned to the stunned mercenary.
"Miss me, Buttercup?" he smirked, yanking off his mask.
"Oh Baby Boy, I'd blow you right here, right now if I felt better." Wade chuckled darkly.
"What's wrong?" Peter frowned, moving over to better inspect him.
"I don't really think we have the time, Petey-Pie. How about you just get this collar off me and we bail. I'll tell you all the fun details once we're out. I mean, I'm assuming Spider-man is here to save the innocent."
"You're far from innocent, Wade." Peter said, rolling his eyes. "But I am still here to get you out."
"That's what makes you amazing."
Peter moved towards the bed Wade was laid out on. The closer he got, the easier it was to make out the strained features on Wade's face. His skin was paler than is should be, and his breathing was a bit labored.
"What did they do to you?"
Before he could respond, the door burst open, the six members of the Avengers crowding in, weapons raised.
They froze as they took in the equally frozen forms of Wade and Peter.
"What happened to that Spider-Sense?" Wade whined.
"You know damn well what happened to it." Peter hissed, trying to ignore the familiar tightening in his chest.
"I'll let it slide this once."
"Really? Wow. Thanks Wade." Peter scoffed sarcastically.
"Peter?"
Peter winced, looking up as Steve stepped forward slowly, his hands raised.
Unconsciously, Peter stepped back closer to Wade, somehow comforted by his presence despite his current state.
"Peter. We need you to step away. Deadpool is a wanted man for the destruction he's caused the city as well as the many murders he's committed. We had orders to bring him in. I promise this isn't some kind of ultimate control thing. By law, Wade is a criminal."
Peter wanted to yell, but he was to stunned to do it. He couldn't look away from Steve Roger's face. The face he had grown to hate, now was on a different man, and it was full of the type of sincerity the Captain America he had once idolized wore.
It was a look he missed so much, it hurt.
It was the look of better times. Times when the Avengers really were the good guys. When they were just people doing the right thing.
Peter swallowed hard, a strange feeling settling in his stomach.
"So, I'm guessing you're not just gonna let me take him?"
"I'm sorry, Peter." Steve frowned, giving a slight shake of his head.
"It's ok, Peter Pumpkin!" Wade coughed again. "No cell can hold me for long."
Before Peter could ask about Wade's coughing, Natasha spoke up.
"That collar on your neck won't be coming off. You'll be sent to The Ice Box."
Wade's face paled even more.
"What's wrong with the collar?" Peter asked suspiciously, eyeing each of the Avengers before him.
"The collar is an inhibitor collar." Sam finally said. "It's suppressing his powers. It's how the guards are able to manage the mutants sent there."
Peter stared at them a moment before his eyes went wide and he dove on top of Wade, his hands clawing at the thing around his neck. No matter how hard he tried though, he couldn't get it off.
"Take it off of him!" Peter shouted, continuing to pull despite its futility.
"Peter,"
"No, Rogers! Take it off of him now!"
"It's vibranium Pete." Wade coughed wetly. "I guess it's beyond even your strength."
In desperation, before he could even process his movements, Peter dove across the room, latching himself to Bucky and shocking everyone.
"Please! You have to take it off!"
"I can't do that." Bucky said, his voice strained as his alpha fought against the obvious distress of his omega.
"You don't understand!"
HIs panic growing, Peter moved to Natasha.
"He can't have his powers suppressed!" he cried, grabbing her hand.
Taking a deep breath, Natasha slowly put her hand on his cheek.
"What's wrong, my omega?"
Ignoring her possessive words, Pete leapt at the chance to be listened to.
"He has cancer! The only thing keeping him alive is his healing factor! If you leave that collar on him, he's actually going to die. Can't you see how bad he looks?"
The team looked over, not missing the fact that Wade hadn't even tried to sit up.
"Please." he whispered.
"Release him."
Peter looked up as Thor stepped forward, nodding towards Steve. He smiled up at the god, not even noticing the fact Natasha was continuing to caress his cheek.
"This will be fun." Tony chirped as Steve sighed, pulling a small device out of his pocket and pressing a button.
Peter turned sharply as Wade took a large breath, the collar clanging to the floor.
Dropping Natasha's hand, Peter rushed to Wade's side.
Wade sat up slowly, allowing himself to reorient before looking up at Peter's relieved face.
"How about the next time you apartment sit for me, you don't roam the streets wearing my clothes? And definitely not my favorite hoodie at that."
"So, there's gonna be a next time?" Wade asked hopefully.
Taking a quick glance over his shoulder, Peter frowned.
"Don't push your luck, DP."
"I love you." Wade sighed happily, wrapping his arms around Peter's waist.
Suddenly there was an angry commotion behind him as the alphas set their sights on the now healing merc.
"How about you let him go before I blast you?" Tony snarled, his gauntlet forming around his hand.
Peter watched as Tony's repulsers, Natasha's pistols, Thor's hammer, Bucky's pistol and Steve's shield all pointed Wade’s way.
"Whoa," Sam said, stepping in-between the groups. "Let's all just take some breaths and relax. No need for violence here. Besides, we need to get Pete and Wilson out of here before the whole force of SHIELD comes down on them."
Grumbling, the alphas put their weapons away as Peter helped Wade off the bed. He leaned heavily on Peter, not yet fully restored.
Putting on his signature sun glasses, Tony spoke.
"What we got FRI?"
"FRI? As in FRIDAY? As in the ancient sack running Avengers's Tower?"
Everyone froze as the unfamiliar voice scoffed.
"Now is not the time, GWEN." Peter scolded, leading Wade's towards the door.
"It that GWEN? That unimpressive hack, working with Mr. Parker?"
The Avengers stumbled as the uncharacteristic reply from the usually level AI.
"Really, ladies, now is not the time." Peter growled. "Just get us out of here GWEN."
"Fine." GWEN grumbled. "Coast is still clear, Peter."
"I have temporarily disabled the cameras to the exit, Peter." FRIDAY offered smugly.
"Shut up."
"Alright big guy, let's go."
"Who is GWEN?" Steve asked, stepping aside to let Peter pass, hoping his seeming truce with the Avengers would continue after this interaction.
"A friend." Peter replied with a grunt as he shifted Wade.
"Here, let me help." Bucky said, throwing Wade's other arm over his shoulders.
"I feel so special." Wade cooed.
"I'm gonna kick your ass once you feel better." Peter stated firmly.
"Any time you want to, Petey."
Peter gave Wade a hard jostle in response.
"Before that though, real nice to send me to find Eddie and Venom."
"How was that little reunion? Was it everything I'd dreamed it would be? Are you guys besties now?" Wade demanded.
"It was fine. I was actually in the middle of something with them when I got your message."
As Wade and Peter rambled, the alphas quietly soaked up every ounce of information Peter dropped. Still, they didn't know who Eddie, Venom, and GWEN were. Out of the three however, GWEN was who they were interested in the most.
It was obvious Peter had only recently met this Eddie and Venom, but it seemed he had known GWEN a little longer, as well as being very close with her.
"Wait, how does that GWEN of yours know my FRIDAY?" Tony suddenly asked.
"I uh....I dropped by the tower. Bruce told me how to find you." Peter tossed over his shoulder.
"So, GWEN went with you?"
"Yeah. She pretty much goes everywhere with me in some form."
As they walked, Peter continued to hold light conversation with everyone, while he was internally breaking down.
He had gotten close enough to the Avengers for them to have easily killed him if they had wanted to. How could he have let himself be led by his emotions so easily? Yes, Wade had become a friend, but Peter had learned long ago about the value of keeping up your guard and making hard calls when it came to the Avengers.
His mind was going to short out.
His spider-sense was quiet outside of the buzz of being in the building and needing to get Wade out.
It still wasn't registering any of his former enemies as...well....enemies.
Wade didn't owe him big, he owed him huge.
"We're getting close to the exit Peter."  GWEN said. "You'll be able to throw the load into the car soon."
"Wow. Thanks GWENNIE." Wade puffed.
Peter snickered.
The alphas loved and hated it. They were glad to see their omega enjoying himself, but they hated that it was Deadpool who caused it.
They desperately wanted to be at a point where Peter felt as equally comfortable with them as he did the murderous mercenary.
It wasn't lost on them how that sounded.
Still, right now, Peter was with them, and he wasn’t displaying the aggression he usually did. They were finally getting a glimpse of how things could be if Peter actually wanted to be around them.
As they exited the building, Peter opened the back door and threw Wade in.
"Peeeteeyyyy!" Wade whined from his crumpled position. "While I usually wouldn't complain about being manhandled, I'm in a very delicate state and could use some tender love."
"You'll get nothing 'tender' from me, Wilson."
"So I can get the manhandling though?"
Peter slammed the door shut.
Sending a glare to the inside of the car, Peter finally turned and froze.
He had somehow managed to tune out the fact that he was surrounded by Avengers, five of which were very interested in him.
Noticing his growing anxiety, Sam stepped forward.
"Well, I guess you owe Bruce now." Sam smirked. "He won't cash in on it, but I will."
"I think it's Wade who owes Bruce."
"Bruce gave you the information so you could 'save' him."
Peter paused, staring at the smirking man.
"I hate you. I want that known. I hate you."
"Please, you love me."
"I already told you that Bruce was my favorite."
There was an indignant snort behind Sam, causing them both to look over at the alphas. While there was frustration on their faces, it was clear it was directed towards Sam.
It really sunk in for Peter then just how honest Sam had been when he had promised not to tell anyone they had been meeting. Not only did they know now though, they also knew Bruce was in on it as well.
Peter briefly wondered if they would accuse Clint as well since the three betas were obviously their own little group.
Realizing the situation was getting tense, Sam held out Peter's mask that he had been holding.
"Thanks, man." Peter smiled tightly.
"Finally. I was getting motion sickness from the swinging. That's nothing like swinging with you Peter." GWEN chided.
"If you can't handle movement like that, you obviously aren't ready to assist a superhero." FRIDAY chimed in.
"Can it you dinosaur."
"GWEN, can you please not antagonize the AI?"
"She started it."
Tony stared wide eyed as FRIDAY, his baby, argued with some disembodied female voice as if it was the most natural thing in the world.
"Well," Peter started awkwardly.
This hadn't been how he imagined this rescue mission going. He had never expected to confront the Avengers, much less get help from them. There was no ill will in any of their actions, and they hadn't made any sudden moves towards him. Hell, even Steve's steps forward had been slow and guarded, as though he was trying hard not to alarm him.
He didn't want to, God how he didn't want to, but he couldn't rightfully deny the fact they were being......good. They were just doing their jobs. Wade was a criminal, and a disaster. They had every right to take him in. However, upon learning Wade most likely wouldn't even make it to confinement in his state, they had chosen to free him. Of course, Peter wasn't an idiot, he knew there would be a catch.
"Listen, Peter," Steve started.
Here is came.
"Wade has to leave and never come back."
Peter blinked in surprise.
"What?"
"He's a wanted man here." Bucky answered.
"By releasing him, we're allowing him to live, but he is not paying for the crimes he has committed. We can not, in good conscious, condem him to such a death, but we can also not allow him to continue as he is." Thor shook his head.
"If he comes back, we can't help him again." Natasha nodded.
Peter searched each of their faces, looking for any sign of deceit, or extra conditions, but there was nothing. Their faces were void of anything other than the truth of what was said. Sam's own face mirrored theirs.
"I...I can't make that promise." Peter sighed. "I can't control Wade's coming and going, but I can understand your position and I accept what will happen if he comes back. I won't help you find him though."
"You're not an Avenger, omega." Tony smirked. "Not your job."
Peter nodded, backing around the car to the driver's side door, always keeping the alphas in sight. Taking one last look at the people he had hated and now felt over loaded and numb towards, Peter got into the car and drove off.
"Wanna talk?" Wade's voice came from the backseat.
"Not really." Peter said, watching the SHIELD headquarters get small behind them.
"Maybe you should."
"Arn't you supposed to be the carefree, funny guy?" Peter grumbled, his grip tightening on the steering wheel.
"I can actually be a good listener, Petey." Wade huffed.
Peter sighed, looking in the review to see Wade sitting up and stretching his limbs.
"Get up front." Peter said, pulling off to the side of the road.
"Yay!" Wade cheered, hopping out the back and sliding into the passenger seat.
"Let's girl talk!"
"Maybe he's not ready to talk." GWEN said defensively.
"And maybe little AI's shouldn't interfere in adult conversations."
"And maybe ungrateful assholes shouldn't push uncomfortable topics on the person who didn't have to rescue them but did."
Wade was quiet a second before continuing.
"Anyway! Let's chat about you and the Avengers! Things seemed pretty.....less murdery back there."
"Wade." Peter growled.
"We should really discuss these thing Mr. Jones." Wade said, throwing out his most professional voice.
"You are not a licensed therapist, and if you were, I'd immediately cancel my appointment."
"Aww! Come on Baby Boy! This is the good stuff! Besides, I'm still a little shaken! You should humor me in my time of need."
"I haven't kicked you out yet. That's all the humoring you get."
Wade pouted as he looked out the window.
"I'm not speaking to you for the rest of the ride."
"Are you threatening me with a good time?" Peter asked, raising an eye brow in challenge.
"I say good." GWEN offered. "You and I can talk, Peter."
"You get to talk to him all the time!" Wade cried. "I don't get to see you much, and this is what I get? I let you use my apartment for a vacation! You got to see a former enemy have his life reformed into a...morally grey, vigilante!"
"Oh, we're definitely gonna discuss the fact you sent me on a vacation to meet Venom! However, we still have to discuss the conditions of your release."
"Gasp! Did you get me free by promising them dates? Petey you sly fox!"
"No!" Peter shouted, nearly slamming on the breaks. "I am not going to date the Avengers for anyone! The terms of your release were that you could never come back here. If you do come back, and you get caught, there is no second chance for you, Wade! You come back and get caught, and you go straight to The Ice Box."
Wade was silent as he stared at the side of Peter's face.
"Well, that sucks."
Peter's head hit the steering wheel.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Peter threw his arms over his eyes as he laid down on his couch. He could hear Wade bustling about the kitchen, fixing a thank you meal before he left.
He had crossed so many boundaries for Wade tonight. Boundaries he wasn't sure how he was going to reestablish. He had broken his own rules by dropping his guard around the Avengers and showing vulnerability.
Still, he couldn't bring himself to have allowed them to take Wade as he was. Without his ability, being thrown into a place like The Ice Box was a death sentence for someone like him. The people there most likely would have killed him long before the cancer took him. It wasn't like he would be able to fight back really.
He had fully expected to, not only have his please ignored, but to be thrown into prison himself. It wasn't something he would have put past them anyway.
Instead, they had listen. They listened, and agreed to let Wade go. They let him go, and even helped Peter get him out.
The most annoying thing though, had been when Peter expected them to make unsavory demands of him, they had merely asked him to accept the fact that if Wade returned, there would be no escaping his fate. He would be caught, and he would go to The Ice Box.
There had been no threats, no malicious looks, no deceiving implications.
It had been strictly honest actions.
Peter scoffed at his thoughts, turning and burying his face in the back of the couch.
He just wanted to forget the entire night. Forget their faces. Forget their.....kindness.
Eh. The word left a bitterness on his tongue.
It wasn't supposed to be like this! There wasn't anything to question! The Avengers were villains and that's all their was to it! They couldn't really be trusted. They probably tracked him back to his home, waiting on Wade to leave before they struck.
"I can hear you thinking from in here, Spidey." Wade sighed. "Just come in here and talk."
Peter stayed buried in the couch a few moments before finally getting up and slinking into the kitchen. Sliding on the bar stool, Wade placed a plate of pancakes and syrup in front of him.
"It's pretty much breakfast time anyway." Wade grinned. "Eat up."
"Peter looked down at the plate of food, his stomach growling. When had he eaten last?
"So," Wade started. "What happens after I leave?"
"Nothing. You stay gone or that's it for you." Peter grunted, stuffing a forkful of pancake in his mouth.
"I don't mean me, Petey-Pie. What happens with you? I may joke a lot, but I know what tonight cost you."
Peter paused, looking up at Wade's face, his fork halfway to his mouth.
"I don't know." Peter replied, lowering his eyes. "They weren't supposed to just let you go. They were supposed to fight me. It should have been my proof of how they weren't any different than the Avengers from my old world."
"Petey, I've been to a lot of worlds, and I can promise you that this one isn't like yours."
"I have a lot of scars you know. Physically and emotionally. There are nights I wake up screaming. GWEN monitors my vitals at night and tried to wake me before they get to bad, but sometimes the dreams aren't that easy to catch. I can be having a perfectly normal dream and it'll just go to shit in an instant. No build up."
"Peter-"
"They took everything away from me, Wade. Before they went rouge, I had lost all of my family aside from my Aunt May. She wasn't even blood kin, you know. She was only related to me by marriage, but she was all I had and we loved each other. She died when they blew up the street our house was on because they found out a house was harboring a mutant. I had to live thinking I was the cause of my last family members death until I found out it was a 12 year old kid they went after. In once quick instant, the last on my family was taken from me, along with an entire street of innocent families. I'm an orphan, and while I'm only enough that it shouldn't really matter, it does."
Wade frowned as Peter continued to stare at the countertop blankly.
"After Aunt May, it became my friends. I watched them die right in front of me. Some of them even died shielding me from an attack! They had to save me because I obviously wasn't doing a good enough job protecting myself and what did it get them? They died! I might as well have killed them with my own hands at that point.
There were nights........nights I went back to the safe house covered in so much blood I couldn't tell what was mine or someone else's."
"You can't blame yourself for that, Pete. They made their own choices. You can't take that from them."
"I'm not more important than anyone else, Wade!" Peter shouted, slamming his fist down on the countertop and cracking it.
"They should have protected themselves! We were all fighting! We all knew the risks!"
There was a pause before Peter's soft voice filled the air.
"It's not fair, Wade. It's not. Everyone is here. Everyone. Aunt May and Uncle Ben are here, and I can't even see them because their Peter is dead. How would I explain to them, or anyone else for that matter, who I am? If I go around them, everyone we knew will recognize me. Harry and MJ are together, and Norman is actually a loving father to him. Xavier's school is still teaching students. The X-Men are still active. The Fantastic Four and The Defenders are all still alive too. This world has everything! It has all my friends, family and...."
"The Avengers you wish you had." Wade finished.
Peter felt the first tear slide down his cheek. It didn't take long for others to follow.
Wade quietly moved the plate of pancakes away, and began tidying up the kitchen, allowing Peter to have his moment. He knew things had been terrible in Peter's time, he just hadn't known how bad. He had never been there during the really bad times. He had been there when the first signs appeared, and then returned after Peter had set off the bomb. Now, he wished he had returned earlier.
Maybe he could have been of some use.
Maybe he could have helped spare Peter a little bit of pain.
He could hear Peter's quiet sobs behind him. He wanted to comfort him, but knew Peter needed to do this on his own. He needed to sort out his feelings and come to his own conclusions.
He continued to keep himself busy until Peter's cries stopped, and only a few sniffs remained.
Turning around, he watched as Peter wiped his eyes and composed his features.
"Wade, if you do decide to come back for whatever reason, promises me you'll be careful about it. Don't let anyone know you're here."
"I won't make that exact promise, but I'll try."
"Thanks." Peter said, giving him a small smile. "I guess you better get ready to go. They probably tracked us here and are waiting to make sure you leave."
"I don't think they did, Baby Boy. Just trust me on this one."
Peter didn't respond.
Sighing, Wade made his way to the bedroom and started gathering up all his stuff. He paused as he looked into his duffle, then pulled out a zip up bag.
"Here." he said, tossing the bag to Peter. "Thats a set of copy keys to every safe house I have. If you ever need an escape, you can go wherever you want."
Peter looked down at the bag in surprise.
"I'll write down the addresses for each of them. The keys are marked."
"Wade, I can't-"
"Consider it a permanent thank you." Wade smirked. "I know all about The Ice Box, Petey. It's the only place I've ever actually worried about going to."
The two stared at each other before Peter's safe softened.
"Thanks, Wade."
"Don't mention it. However, you might want to check in with your vigilante friends. I'm pretty sure Daredevil has been skulking around lately."
"Yeah." Peter sighed.
"I can send him a text, Peter." GWEN spoke for the first time since getting home.
"Thanks GWEN."
"You know," Wade smiled. "I'm gonna miss you GWENNIE. You sassy little AI, you."
"I suppose you're not that bad." GWEN replied.
Despite the sarcastic words, her voice had an air of acceptance to it.
Finished packing, Wade grabbed a sheet of paper from Peter's desk and scrawled out the addressed to his places.
"You're all set." He said, turning to give Peter a reassuring smile.
Peter looked over at the list before turning his eyes back to his friend.
"Come here, Spidey." Wade grinned, pulling Peter into a hug.
Peter let out a breath as he returned the gesture.
"Take care, and pay ole Eddie visits every now and then. I'm sure your old pal Venom would love to see you too!"
Peter gave an exasperated chuckled as Wade threw him one last smirk before disappearing in a flash of light.
The apartment was quiet after Wade's departure. A quiet Peter hadn't really registered in a while now.
"Peter?"
"Yeah, GWEN?"
"You should get some sleep. I sent Matt a text so he knows you're back. I"m sure you're going to have a lot of explaining to do tomorrow. I suggest you be well rested for it."
"I don't know if I can sleep." Peter frowned, sitting down on his bed and peeling off his scent blockers.
"You should try."
Sighing, Peter  made himself comfortable. He felt his scent glands relaxing as the skin around where the blockers had been eased itself. Suddenly, a wonderful scent filled his nostrils. It seemed to sooth his anxiety and relax him.
"GWEN?"
"Yes Peter?"
"Did you release something into the air?"
"No."
"I just...I smell something....nice."
GWEN didn't reply for a moment.
"Peter," she said slowly. "I want you to touch your right cheek, then smell your fingers."
"That....that is a very specific and unsettling request."
"Just do it."
Curious, Peter ran his fingers over his cheek, then brought them to his nose. Taking a deep breath, his sniffed the air.
"It's, it's coming from my cheek."
"I thought so."
"What is it?"
"Peter, when we were with the Avengers, you asked Natasha Romanov for help. While you were asking, she placed her hand on your cheek. It was there for a good amount of time. Enough for her scent to seep in despite her blockers."
Peter froze.
"But...I'm only just now smelling it!"
"Most likely the smell was intensified when you removed your own blockers."
Peter's mind raced with GWEN's words. His once relaxed body no tense again.
"Peter? I know this may be hard, but I want you to focus on that smell. You need to sleep, and it will help."
"How, how can I?" he growled. "How could I have just let that happen?"
"Rest, Peter." GWEN ordered. "We'll talk more after you wake."
Peter stared at his fingers as though they had offended him.
He had allowed himself to be touched by her! How could he?
Squeezing his eyes shut, Peter tried to block out the alluring scent filtering in.
If he could just sleep, maybe it would be gone when he woke up.
As he thought about his various failures of the day, his fingers unconsciously moved towards him. Without realizing his actions, he took in deep breaths of the wonderful smell.
The last thought he had before sleep took him, was one word.
Alpha.
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allegra-writes · 4 years ago
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The real Self-Insert💚
A.K.A HAPPY BIRTHDAY DANA
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This is just a little cracky something for my adored @chaoticpete for her birthday. I LOVE YOU FOREVER MY STUNNING CHAOS TWIN💖
If it weren't for the fact that they saw with their own eyes the exact moment the golden sparkly portal opened up above their heads, Dana's unusually fast reflexes the only thing saving Allie from a certain death (or at leat a very painful concussion), as a very big, very much corporeal Loki fell through it, they wouldn't have believed it.
Like, Marvel Loki. Tom Hiddleston-looking Loki, six-foot-two tall Loki, all leather and metal full asgardian armor on, cracking the pavement under him as he hit the ground.
As it was, they still had trouble believing it, looking up to where the portal had disappeared -again, before their very eyes to the unresponsive. Man? Comic character? Being? God? Laying on the floor.
"Allie, do you see him too?"
"..."
"Allie, tell me I'm not imagining this" Dana reached blindly for Allie's hand beside her, eyes never leaving Loki's figure, unblinking. Finally, she felt her friend's grip on her wrist. They both deemed it close enough to a hand hold.
"It's real"
She was kind of expecting that answer but somehow it didn't make it any easier to process.
It didn't really help that Loki still wasn't moving.
"Is he... Is he dead?"
"I don't know"
"... Poke him"
"What??"
"Poke him with a stick"
"Dude I'm not GOING TO POKE THE GOD OF MISCHIEF WITH A STICK-" Their increasingly louder chatter was interrupted by a gasp as Loki's eyes sudenly opened.
"Allie"
"I know"
"ALLIE HE LOOKED INTO ME"
"I SAW"
"Would the two of you SHUT UP?" There was a second, terrorized gasp, as the asgardian finally arose, dusting his clothes, clearly exasperated, "Even your whispers are loud! can't believe it! First the stupid green monster thats not so stupid anymore, then that would be sorcerer with his portals and now this! This is the most infuriating. exhausting, worst day EVER!"
Dana and Allie exchanged a look and a slight nod before Dana reached into her backpack, producing a magenta and blue can.
"Would you like some Rockstar?"
Loki did a double take,
"Some what?"
"It's an energy drink"
"It's the energy drink-"
"Three hundred milligrams of pure caffeine"
"And sugar, don't forget the sugar
"Yes, the sugar is very important"
"Basically the midgardian version of asgardian mead, only the other way around"
"Yeah, instead of making you drunk it makes you hyper allert"
"And energized"
Loki spent the whole explanation looking from one to the other, there was something eery in the way they talked, and moved, expanding on the other's explanation in complete synchrony. It wasn't unheard of among mortals, he knew. But it usually was limited to twins and these girls couldn't look more different
Except for the fact they were both tiny. And strangely endearing. He had never been one to be swayed by midgardian beauty, but he had to admit there was something charming in their sparkly eyes and impish little faces.
"So you say this... Drink of yours, it can help me recover?" He inquired cautiously. The two girls nodded eagerly, still offering the can to him. He took it, sniffed it, shrugged to himself, and took a sip.
It was foul. Overly sweet and fragant, reminding him of the medicine the healers used to give him back home at the palace, when he was an infant.
But for some reason he could not stop drinking it. He didn't, in fact, downing the whole thing in one go.
"This is... Strangely invigorating" He concluded, handing the empty can back to the impressed girls still gawking at him. And then doing something that sent their jaws to the floor, "Thank you, you are both very kind and agreeable... For a couple of mortals, of course"
The two girls beamed at him, and he couldnt help but smile a little in return. He didn't miss the way their heartbeats lost their rythm, only to return faster and louder than ever at his smile. He smirked to himself, yeah, he still had it.
"Well, I should be off then-" He tried turning around to open a portal of his own but was immediately stopped by twin over-excited voices speaking over each other.
"Wait! Can I get a selfie?"
"Wait! Can I get a knife??"
"Dude!"
He didn't know which request surprised him and pleased him the most.
Well, that's a lie, he knew exactly which one it was. Yes, he had a big ego, so what?
"Why, yes, of course" He grinned, obviously flattered. Having seen his brother do it plenty of times, he leaned down a little, as the girls placed themselves on either side of him, cellphones up high to be able to fit all three of them into frame. He felt them jump a little as he placed his arms around both their waists, smiling even wider. Once that was done he snapped his fingers, a blue portal appearing behind him, showing the face of an impassive Natasha and a confused Thor, as Loki bent down, delicately taking the girls hands into his huge ones, kissing their knuckles in turns.
"I bid you farewell, my fair ladies. You have been most helpful and pleasant. I will not forget your kindness..."
The girls giggled, flushed and giddy as the portal closed behind the god of mischief, and he disappeared once again, the crack in the pavement and the tingle on their hands the only testament of his presence there.
"Oh my god. Did that-... Thay actually happened, right?"
"I have no idea, but if we are hallucinating, I promise I will never, ever, complain about our last braincell again"
"Same... To bad we didn't get knives tho"
"Dee!"
"What? You so wanted his dagger too, don't try to lie to me"
Allie snorted,
"Dude, do you have to make it sound so dirty?... You're not wrong tho"
"You know I have to. And I know I'm not"
"Dee..."
"Yeah?"
"We met Loki"
"I know! I mean I still can't believe it tho. Did we? I mean we did, right? We have a selfie to prove it..." There was a beat before Dana started complaining about Allie's backpack, "What do you even carry im here? I swear this thing gets heavier by the minute"
She took it off and peered into it.
"ALLIE COME HERE YOU ARE NOT GONNA BELIEVE THIS"
The end.
@chaoticpete Baby D, my gorgeous, crazy, tallented, amazing, showstoppin soul sister, words cannot express how much I love ypu and how much your friendship means to me. I made you cry this morning but I hope this can make you laugh💖 You make my days brighter, twin from another mother. I love you, so so much. Hope you like this💖💖
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idjitlili · 4 years ago
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Masterlist:
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Lord of the rings & the hobbit
Kili Imagines:
Potato peeler
Kiss my ass
Rain
Blah It’s me
Ditto
Firework
Your eyes can be so cruel
Hello there,
Shrimp dick Azog.
Fili Imagines:
Cell mates
Flower crown
The Seth rogen to my James Franco
she’s the man
Eomer Imagines:
Tent= injuries
Who is Jared
They hate us cuz they anus
Legolas Imagines:
Don’t drown princess
I’m Gollum gimme my precious
Let’s boogie
Legolas isn’t my boyfriend
You started it. 
Hey,I’m date mike.
Thranduil Imagines:
Dance off bro
You had sex?
I see stars
Bath
Thorin Imagines:
Virgin 
Damn
Dildo Gaggins
You did nawttt
Heat of the moment
What can I say I like to climb
Hey,my names Korg  {part 2}
Hey there Mr blue sky.
Thor,Son of Odin.
Thorin?No,Thor
The goblin king..the one without the warts.
Faramir Imagines:
Burnt.
Oh let’s just be together then.
Bear.
Proud.
Stop,wait and listen baby,thats my pilosophy.
Boromir Imagines:
Campfire.
clumsy.
Bofur Imagines:
The toy store.
Aragorn Imagines:
Potato buddies.
Oh no, the hobbits Aragorn.
Lindir Imagines:
I’m gonna put some dirt in your eye.
Carol’s cookies.
Bard Imagines:
Gonna need a wheel chair.
swayze.
Marvel Imagines
Loki Imagines:
Hey that’s Hela!Shut up Thorin.
I can be the God of your Orgasm.
Buffy the vampire slayer/Angel
Spike Imagines:
Don’t stop me now.
You’re dead , Lachance.
The Labyrinth
Jareth Imagines:
Lurking in the dark
You underestimate my power.
We could be heroes.
Star wars
Obi-wan imagines:
Hello there,
Why did you kidnap Jareth?
C-changes
No longer the Seth rogen to my James Franco...
The mandalorian
Din Djarin imagines:
I, I will be king. (I) (II)
Resident Evil
Leon s. Kennedy imagines:
Smells like jealousy
(Comingsoon I SWEAR)
Stranger things
Billy Hargrove imagines:
Bulltrue (part 2 coming sòon)
Billy Joels ass.
You make me breakout.
Point break.
The wrong type of charmer
Idle hands are the devils playground.
Steve Harrington Imagines:
The wrong type of charmer.
Rather read these on a different site?
•Ao3
•Wattpad
•Quotev
WHAT I WON'T WRITE:
Probably should mention,I won’t write incest and such,aswell as pregnancy ,or children{I know I have wrote a pregnant imagine before but I just don’t like writing them} Nor will I write imagines where the reader is a child ,or with anything other than Y/n.
PLEASE DO NOT PLAGIARISE MY SHITTY FANFICTIONS, please.
Characters I would prefer to write about this moment:
Billy hargrove
Dean winchester?
Which they all will be x reader so everyone can enjoy, thank you my dudes. Have a bodacious day.
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sapphicomenn · 4 years ago
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WELCOME TO MY THOUGHTS WHILE REWATCHING THE MCU IN TIMELINE ORDER: THOR
it was a dark and stormy night when padme, an old man, and a beautiful nerd named darcy a find bright light in the sky with thunder and s giant tornado in it. AND CHRIS HEMSWORTH HOLY SHIT
STORYTELLING WITH ODIN ABOUT A FIGHT WITH ICE CREAM TROLLS. frosty the snow man is angry about it
GLOWY CUBE
agard. sounds like ass guard. baby thor and loki are adorable. story telling ended up being fairytail for children. WINGED HELMET
LOKI LOKI LOKI LOKI LOKI LOKI
ah yes. the hammer named MILJinoNOR made in the heart of a star. ohshit walls got frosty. AMBUSH
“i swear, i swear, i sWEAR!” SHUSH IT AND GET TO FIGHTING. YALL GOT FROSTY BOYS INVADING ASS GUARD- oh fuck eye beam giant is OP.
thor is bloodthirsty, thats how you get the plot of the movie when you get turned mortal :/
loki is lovely i love him. he will never ever ever do anything wrong- oh hes starting drama between thor and frosty boys
WHOMST THE FUCK ARE THESE PEOPLE??
“and who proved wrong that a young maiden could be one of the fiercesr warriors.” “i did” “true, but i supported you, sif.” JSHSKHSKSJSKSJSJ
HORSES ON THE GLITTER GLASS BRIDGE. this is all beautiful wtf i love asgard. HEIMDALL- thor stfu dont shut loki down ya fucker. yall are bullying loki and then get shocked he turns evil?
MAGIC SWORD IS THE KEY TO ALL THE REALMS. HAHA ROUND THINGY GO SPINNY SPINNY. heimdall tells em the bridge to frosty realm might fuck em over and leave em to die.
“we shouldnt be here.” MAYBE BRING THAT UP AT THE PLANNING BIT, NOT THE ‘WE’RE HERE LETS GO EXPLORE’ BIT. DEEP VOICE IS SMEXY AS FUCK
“You’re nothing but a boy. who came to prove hinself a man.”
“know your place. brother.” STOP BEING MEAN TO LOKI, THOR :(
HAMMER GO B O N K ON FROSTY BOYS SKSNSKSKSK
LOKIS MAGIC IS AMAZING YOU’RE DOING GREAT BBY- laughing during a sword fight because fuck every other emotion righ- OHSHIT NVM HE GOT IMPALED ON A SPIKE OF ICE
GIANT SNOW BEAST GO BRRRR. THUNDER ON THESE FROST COVERED ASSES- whY is he still laughing he got a spike through his chest what the hell dude you good?
HOLYSHIT THOR JUST CHUCKED MILNNOR THROUGH THE BEASTS FUCKING HEAD LIKE A KNIFE THROUGH BUTTER
ODIN TO SAVE THE DAY AND GET HIS CHILDS ASS OUT OF TROUBLE. thor started a fucking war because of this fightboner jesus christ this child. SHOUTING MATCHES
daddys angry with his child- thor is unworthy this, unworthy that. AND BANISHED TO EARTH LIKE A FUCKING LOSER SKSHSKSJSJ
and back to padme’s modern time wE GO
HA HE GOT MERKED BY A TAZER
DARCY YOU ADORABLE CHILD
“How dArE YOu aTtAcK tHE SoN oF oDIN😡😡😡” hes like an angry puppy
body in a photo?? pog info??? WHY HAS HE BEEN HIT BY A CAR TWICE ALREADY
STAN LEE
COULSON
THOR IS FUCKING RIPPED. meanwhile is ass guard. loki snitched for a good reason. but nOoOoO thors, friends, blame loki.WHY ARE THEY BLAMING LOKI FOR BRING IN THE FROSTY BOYS- oh shit he can controll the snow cube. backstory for loki? mayhaps?- HOLYSHIT HES A SMURF
“the casket wasnt the only thing you took from jotunheim that day, was it?” HES ONTO YOU ODIN. odin literally kidnapped- oh no nvm loki as a baby was left for dead. I WANNA HUG LOKI SO BAD HES IN EMOTINAL DISSTRESS :(
“because i-i-i’m the monster, parents tell their children about at night?” LOKI BABY EVERYTHINGS GONNA BE OKAY
holyshit loki’s breakdown killed odin wtf. my man collasped onto the staircase
“this drink. i like it.” “i know its gre-“ “ANOTHER! *SHATTERING GLASS*”
“myeu muh? whats a myeu muh?” DARCY I LOVE YOU SO MUCH SKSHSKHSKS
man coulson thats a dick move to snatch up all of padmes shit- AND DARCYS IPOD???
loki do be looking snazzy on the throne👀 good for him. look at these fucker friends of thor tryna make him inbanish thor :/
BOOKS- on norse myth.? yeah norse myth
padme is sus of thor, and almost got em into a car crash. “god i hope you’re not crazy.” oh wait till you aee what happens
ODINS TAKING A NAP FOR THOUSNDS OF YEARS OR SUMSHIT
frigga is tryna convice loki they meant well. kinda hard too ngl. damn shield has beefed up security around this fucking hammer
oh shit electrical thunder is fucking with the shield tech once thor showed up. RAIN AND MAGIC HUMMING- thor is kicking shield’s ass- COULSON- who the fuck chooses a bow and arrow to shoot a target when they had sniper rifle- barton- HAWKEYE NVM BADASS ARROW GUY IS AMAZING
oh shit thor found miljjnor. mudfight but make it less smexy. epic momentt pogg.. its totally gonna fail him so fucking bad its gonna be funny
told you so.
now hes yelling at the sky like an insane person
AND got arrested :I
poor heimdall having to watch this all like a sad sitcom. OLDMAN STFU
“look its myeu-muh!” darcy needs to be protected at ALL COST. ohmygod they think thor is a solider from enemy lines aIshsksjskks
LOKIII- oh shit hes telling thor everything went wrong bc him and that a truce was- NVM LOKI IS TRYING THE HAMMER. YOU GOT IT LOKI
old man go save thors stupid ass. redeem yourself. bar talk is somehow wholesome. oh shit thors gotta dip outta town bc oldman said so. he didint listen to odin and ended up starting a war- OH CRAP LOKI DID LET THE FROSTY BOYS INTO ASGARD.
heimdall knows loki is causing trouble. good for loki. HA RHE OLDMAN GOT FUCKING WASTED BY THE BOOZE LIKE A COWARD.
padme is so awkward around thor. shes in looovvveee. awh thor snatched up her genius book from shield. YIGHDRISLE is such an amazing name for a tree filled with planets and worlds
DUDE DONT SHAME THE MAN FOR STRESS EATING
LOKI KNOWS HEIMDALL SNITCHED AND LET FUCKER FRIENDS THROUGH. HOLYSHIT THEY FOUND THOR SLJSOSJSKSKS
thor knows loki lied- heimdall knows loki let in the frosty boys, and is currently frozen soild by that blue cube thingy. AND NOW THE OP METAL LAZERBEAM BASTARD IS ON EARTH
OH GOD A SPEAR THROUGH THE THROAT MUST HURT LIKE A MF- SIF DONT DIE
LAZERBEAM STOP BLOWING UP BUILDINGS
dude things were getting blown up left and right but suddenly thor’s plot armor engaged and a car just flips over him and instead of going boom. standoff between lazerface and thor- whomst shall win? find out next week on: HOLYSHIT THE NORSE GODS EXIST
loki just watched thor try to give up his life and now lazerface is leav- FUCK NVM IT BITCH SLAPPED THOR SKSHSJSJSJSKKSKSJ. oH now it leaves
hammer go brrr soon? HAMMER GO BRRRRRR
PADME SAVE YOURSELF THOR JUST GOT POWERED THE FUCK UP
“oh my god” YOU JUST SAW A METAL MECH SHOOT A LAZER OUT ITS FACE AND FOUR PEOPLE IN VIKING ARMOR FIGHT. ARE YOU STILL SHOCKED???
LAZERFACE GO BOOM. THORS BACK BABYY
oh shit the frosty boys are on asgard- HEIMDALL NEEDS TO UNFREEZE AND WORK ITS MAGIC LIKE NOW
oh god the animation for some dead frosty boys got so noticable that was horrible.
TIME TO GO KICK LOKI’S ASS SKSKSJS- OHFUCK FRIGGA NOO. OHSHIT LOKI JUST MURDERED LAUGHY THE FROST KING.
lokis “ohshit thors back” face is amazing
loki hun what the fuck are you doing- stop tryna destory shit like a hero.
“I NEVER WANTED THE THRONE. I WANTED TO BE YOUR EQUAL!” my heart is torn :((
brothers fighting while a energy tree builds around him? sure why not. ohfuck loki got his ass handed to him- THOR WHY DID YOU LEAVE THE HAMMER ON HIM LIKE THAT SKSHSKSJSJSK
THOR WOKE ODIN UP BY VREAKING THE FUCKING RAINBOW BRIDGE
ODINS AWAKE AND SAVE EM AGAIN
IM CRYING LOKI JUST WANTED TO MAKE ODIN PROUD AND HE SHUT EM DOWN LIKE THAT. ODIN YOU FUCKING SUCK
awh this is making me sad i dont like this sad ending this sucks so much. loki deserved better then to die knowing odin hated him :(
heimdall is out of a job now that the bifrost is broken haha loser.
NEXT MOVIE: THE AVENGERS
ignore the misspells and the bad grammar its almost two AM by the time i finished watching and writing this up
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bella-spil · 4 years ago
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Halloween
Summary: you and the avengers spend Halloween together.
Characters: Y/N (your name), Bucky, Loki, Thor, Tony, Steve, Sam, Natasha, Clint, Vision, Wanda, Peter, Shuri.
Warnings: cursing, tbh thats it.  VINE REFERENCES
Word Count: 2.4
A/N: hi.. I’m sry I haven’t written in a while.  School has been killing my creativity.  This is gonna be more of a miniseries, more like 2-3 parts.  It’s prob not gonna get much attention, but if you like it, just comment or re blog bc it helps my confidence with posting stuff on here.  This is also inspired by a meme I saw (Ill post it at the bottom of the story) and a video with Anthony Mackie and Chris Evans (link) Masterlist is here
Tag List: @sea040561 @wednesday-add-em @kmuir1 (lmk if you wanna join)
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Halloween was a week away.  Tony being Tony, already paid for the decorations for the tower, so basically all of the floors look like a haunted house.  Rolls of toilet paper stretched across arches in the hallways, tiny spiders were all over furniture, bones and eyes and zombies and witches and everything in between that you could possibly think of was in the tower.  The tower looked like a zombie on steroids; creepy yet entertaining at the same time.  
Everyone was fine with the decorations, but the costumes were a big issue.  Steve and Tony kept arguing over the ideas, both of them wanting to do group costumes.  Everyone else had their ideas too, but Tony and Steve were at each other's throats for the past couple weeks, since like August.  Your room in the tower was right by the meeting office, so hearing the two of them screaming at each other for the most stupid shit was driving you insane.  Once it got to the point where you had to yell at them to shut up.  
This morning, a week before Halloween, while everyone was there, you cleared your throat while you heard Steve and Tony bickering.
“Guys this is getting to be too much.  We need to have a meeting to discuss these fucken costumes.” you said.
“Yeah this is getting out of control,” Nat agreed.
“Guys, cmon, you have to agree with me.  All of us having Iron Man suits would be awesome.  We could fly around the city all night and have so much fun!” Tony said.
“Tony, stop.  All of us being soldiers is better.”  Steve countered.
“STOP!” Clint groaned.  “You guys are insane.  We need to discuss this as a group.”
Tony and Steve sat across from each other, glaring at each other.  Death was looming between them.  
“Fine,” Tony sighed.  “When and where?”
“The office, 2pm,” Nat said.  “And everyone has to show up, that means you too Bucky.”
Bucky groaned from the other side of the room.  He hated group discussions, he liked working alone better.  Said that it was faster to be alone and you didn’t have to worry as much.
~~~
2pm finally rolled by.  Everyone has showed up in the big office, one that seemed a little too big.  Everyone was tired of the bickering and had showed up, thankfully.  
Tony, Steve, Natasha, Clint, Thor, Bucky, Sam, Peter P, Shuri, Wanda, Vision, Loki and you were crowded around the table.  Tony was standing at the end with a whiteboard, prepared to write down ideas.
“So guys, what do you want to do?” Tony said.
“What about we dress up as famous Star Wars characters?” Sam suggested.
“Nah, Steve isn’t going to know who Yoda is.  That’s a must if we do Star Wars.” Tony said.
“Devils and Angels?” Wanda said.
“Not original,” Steve said.
“What about we just wear each other’s costumes?” Thor suggested.
“You really think you are gonna wear my wings?” Sam said, a hint of annoyance in his voice that made you and Bucky snicker.
“I don’t think any of you guys want to wear a leather catsuit,” Nat said.
“We could dress up as famous vines,” Shuri offered, smirking at you and Peter.  
The three of you quoted vines daily and the rest of the team never knew what you guys meant, which made it even more fun.  Eventually, Sam, Bucky and Clint started learning vines with you because they kept saying things which you guys followed up with vine references.  The frustration got to the three men and they started to learn with you, but they weren’t nearly as attentive as you, Shuri and Peter.
“What’s a vine?” Steve asked.
“Vine was a website created in 2012, officially released in 2013.  It was ultimately shut down in 2016.  Vine was a website where users would create short videos an-” Vision said.
“Vis, I don’t think they want a whole essay,” Wanda said, seeing the reactions of the other Avengers.  Sam had started to fake snore, Loki was muttering something to Peter about knifes, and Shuri was about to watch vines, from what you could tell.  
“It’s this app filled with people saying and doing stupid things for attention,” Nat sighed.
“IT IS NOT STUPID!  VINE WAS LEGENDARY!!”  Shuri shouted.
“YOU WOULD DO THINGS FOR THE VINE, YOU UNCULTURED SWINE!!” you shrieked.
“EDUCATE YO SELF!” Clint shouted, right in Natasha’s ear.  Doing that earned him a hard punch in the back of the head.
“Well I don’t have all day so we need something,” Tony groaned, hitting his expo marker against the whiteboard.
You and everyone else was trying to come up with ideas when all the sudden, quiet Peter Parker, who was pretty much the baby of the tower, spoke up.
“Mr. Frost Giant, God sir?” Peter asked.
“Loki,” Loki sighed, pleasantly shocked.
“So, you have ice powers right?” Peter continued.
“Yes, I am an ice giant,” Loki said.
“You should be Elsa for Halloween,” Peter gasped.
Then, out of nowhere, Clint jumped up, looking like he had 5 monster energy drinks and 10 packs of warheads.
“I’LL BE MERIDA!!!” he screamed.
“I must assume that I am going to portray Elsa then,” Thor said, with a smile on his face.
“So...we are doing Disney princesses?” Tony asked, slightly confused.
“Looks like it,” Bucky said.
“Who the fuck am I gonna be?” Shuri asked.
“Language.” Steve said.
You and Shuri looked at each other for a moment and with a slight nod of your head, you were both in a song.
“FUCK SHIT PUSSY ASS!!!” you and Shuri sang.
“MOTHERFUC-” Peter started to continue, but Tony just slapped his hand over Peter’s mouth.  Tony swore that Peter wasn’t like a son to him, but this didn’t help his situation.
Steve was turning ad red as a tomato in his seat, not being able to process all the dirty words that escaped yours and Shuri’s mouths.
“Ok, who are all the Disney Princesses?” Tony asked, frustration in his voice as he looked down at Peter.  Tony gave him a look, one that said “Stop this shit or you get your suit taken away for two weeks” and once Peter nodded his head slightly, Tony removed his hand.
Vision started to list a bunch of them off, even some of the ones that aren’t considered princesses, like Megara, Alice and Jane.  Once Tony had a list of all the princesses, he started to write of all the avengers, making lines to match them up with their character.  
“Ok, who wants to find their Disney princess counterpart first?” Tony asked.
“Me, I already asked before,” Shuri said rolling her eyes.
“Well I mean you already are a princess.” you said.
“Oh,” Shuri said. “I don’t have to dress up then.  Haha.  You can cross my name off, Tony.”
Tony sighed and rolled his eyes, while taking her name off.
“Next?” he sighed.
“What about me?” Steve asked.
“Oh this is gonna be interesting.” Sam grinned.
“Snow White.” Bucky said, without even hesitating.
“Wait why?” you asked.
“Ohhhhh, I think I see why,” Wanda smirked.
“Continue Barnes,” Natasha said.
“First of all, Snow White was the very first princess to come out.  She came out in the thirties or forties.  She’s the oldest.  Steve was the first avenger and he is the oldest.”  Bucky said.
“Bucky, you are a couple months older than me.” Steve countered.
“Second,” Bucky continued, ignoring his friend completely.  “She is like the most gullible and is surrounded by followers.  Snow White was like living with seven dwarfs.  And she was underage and just lived with them. Steve here, was the leader of the Howling Commandos.  And I was in that group, so I had to endure him and his stupid ass decisions, but I couldn’t elect to ignore it.”
“That’s offensive,” Steve said.
“That's the point,” Bucky said.  
“Ok so Steve is Snow White.”  Tony declared, making a line between Snow White and Steve on the whiteboard.  “NEXTT!”
“Me,” said the super secret Russian spy.
“Hmm..” you thought.
“Megara,” said Clint.
“Oh that's a good one,” Sam agreed.
“Who is Megara?” Steve asked.
“She is an attractive Greek lady that Hercules, the son of Zeus, who is the King of the Greek Gods, falls in love with.” Thor explained.
“Thor, how do you of all people know that?” Shuri asked.  “Shouldn’t Vision know all of these things?”
“M’lady, I am formally educated in Disney movies by the request of Peter Parker, also known as ‘The One and Only Friendly Neighborhood Spiderman’.” Thor explained.
“Kid, you make Thor, the God of Thunder, sit through Sleeping Beauty?” Tony asked, shocked.
“My dear man of Iron, Sleeping beauty was quite relaxing.  That Prince Philip, that amazing man, demonstrated quite intellectually advanced ways to use a sword.  Ways that I can use Storm-breaker effectively in battle.” Thor smiled.
Tony and Sam shared a look of disgust with a combination of interest and concern.
“Thor, I don’t think you can learn fighting tactics from a cart-” Vision started.
“I need to watch the movies again,” Clint and Bucky muttered under their breaths.
“No she should be Mulan,” Wanda said.  “Mulan is determined and strong.  Megara just messed with the God of Death.”
“I mess with death all the time,” Natasha countered.
“I should be Megara.” Bucky stated.
“Because you almost died?” Steve asked.
“Because your soul is dark and empty?” Sam asked.
“Yes and no.  My hair is long, not as long as her’s but I can make it work.  Hair extensions.  She plays with Hercules’ emotions.  She is also strong and independent.  Like me.” Bucky explained.
“That settles it.  Bucky is Megara and Natasha is Mulan.”  Tony said, making lines between the two avengers and their princesses.  
“nEXXttT!” Tony shouted.
“Me me me!” Wanda said happily.
“Yes Mr. Stark I would like to go as well.” Vision added.
“Wanda would make the perfect Moana.” Thor said.  “Moana and Wanda both demonstrate very strong emotions, which affect their abilities regarding their powers and limits and they care deeply about the people that mean the most to them.”
He nudged Loki in the shoulder to try to get him more involved in the meeting.  Loki was just throwing his knives up in the air, and Peter was getting very interested, and getting dangerously close to the God of Mischief.  Tony was eyeing the two of them very, very carefully.
“Yeah, yeah sure,” Loki sighed, just going along with Thor or the sake of it.
“Who would Vision be then?” Sam asked.
“He could be the dead grandma,” Clint suggested.
“Yeah, that one that turned into the manta ray.” Nat agreed.
“It’s settled.  Moana and Dead Grandma Ray.” Tony said, making the lines once again.  He had to add “dead grandma” to the board for Vision’s sake.
“NeXXXXXtttT!!” he shrieked.
“Tony, you should be Belle,” Natasha said.
“Yeah.  I mean, they both fall in love and save the people that mean the most to them, even if it means putting their own life at risk.” Steve agreed.
“And they are both really smart.” Peter added.
“Peter, you just had to say that and I would have been on board.  Now I had to listen to Steve and Natasha for a minute.” Tony groaned as he drew a line between his name and Belle’s.
“Thanks Tony,” Steve said sarcastically.
“Your welcome, Capsicle.” Tony gleamed back.
“Sam should be Cinderella.” Bucky said.
“OMG that works!!” Shuri exclaimed.
“Yeah..” Sam realized.  “I’m Cinderella ‘cause she broke, homie.”
“Yeah,” Steve said, smiling from ear to ear, looking back at Sam.
“She represent me, yooo,” Sam said.  Then he looked over at Steve and said, “Lemme borrow twenty dollas.”
By this point, Steve couldn’t hold in the laughter and almost fell out of his chair.  And Sam, being as he called it “Steve’s best friend, better than Bucky,” saved Steve from collapsing on to the floor.
“Steve is the cinder princess.  Deal with it.” Tony declared, adding another line.
“NeeXXttTTT!” Tony screamed.
“Now, all that’s left is Peter and Y/N,” Wanda said, eyeing you two.
“Peter should be Rapunzel.  Before they face the real world, they are both innocent, but then when they see what the world is really like, it changes them.” Thor said, analyzing the similarities between the princess and the superhero.
“Jesus Christ, why is Point break actually really on point?” Tony asked.
“My dear Stalk of corn, I am educated like I told you earlier.  Insect man has really helped me tap into my inner child and all of the pain my demon brother made me endure.” Thor said.
“Spiderman,” Peter mumbled.
“I take that as a complement.” Loki stated, out of the blue.
“Rapunzel is Parker.” Tony declared.
“Last but not least, Y/N.” Steve said.
Now, it took everyone a while to come up with a princess for you.  You didn’t fit the exact mold or looks of a certain princess, so it was definitely harder.
“What about Alice?” Sam said/
“Why the fuck would she be Alice?” Bucky asked.
“Because Alice in Wonderland is supposed to portray the effects of drugs.” Sam explained.
“So your saying that I act like a drug addict?” you asked.
“NO!” Sam shouted.
“Sam, drop it before you dig your own grave.” Steve said.
“What about Jasmine?” offered Wanda.  “You have a very free spirit like her, and she’s your favorite princess.”
“Yeah sure, that sounds fine.” you agreed.
“Y/N is Jasmine!  dOOONNEe!” Tony shouted with relief.
“WAIT I CHANGED MY MIND!” Shuri shrieked.  “I WANNA BE A PRINCESS.  I WANNA BE TIANA SHE IS AN ABSOLUTE BADASS!”
“FINE!” Tony shouted back.  “NOW WE ARE DONE.  EVERYONE HAPPY?”
Everyone in the room, not wanting to disagree with a hot-headed Tony, looked around at each other and slowly nodded their heads.
“Great!” Tony smiled, a complete change in moods.  “Tomorrow we are going to Party City to get our costumes.  Everyone in this room has to come so we can get the wigs and dresses and makeup.  No skipping out.  That includes you Clint, Bucky and Loki.”
The three men who were called out rolled their heads and sighed.  But they agreed to go.  To Tony’s happiness.
“Great.  Meeting finished.  Pepper wants me for something.  Probably for the party.  Nobody try to call me or you will be met with an ear rape of AC/DC.” Tony said, putting on his glasses and promptly leaving the room in Stark fashion.  Everyone eventually left the room, you being lost in your thoughts.  
“You coming, doll?” Bucky asked, seeing you were still sitting in the room.
“Ya, I’ll be out in a second.” you said.  
“Alright, you, me and Clint are doing a Disney marathon for fighting tactics.  Don’t be late or you because we are gonna eat all the food.  I don’t wanna hear you complain.” Bucky said, walking out the door with a lazy drag of his legs.
Now, relief filled your body.  Now you wouldn’t have to hear arguing about costumes!  And they actually agreed to costumes, shockingly.  Now you just couldn’t wait to go to Party City and endure all the chaos.  And then, you left the room to watch Disney movies again, for fighting tactics.  
Oh, the chaos that awaits.  
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