#this? is how he exists in my mind and i CANNOT stress enough

[jackfrostimposter]

genuinely why is there so much misinformation about the guardians of childhood book series?

[light-wrath-paradise]

Me right now: "The Smitten is just like me for real."

Like???? I hope not??????

[harmonysanreads]

Anatomy Of A Hug

ᯓᡣ𐭩 ft. Phainon, Mydei, Anaxa

Heads Up : Soft Yandere themes, Anaxa needs to see a therapist, Written before version 3.1, My Delusions I guess. I merely missed them a lot and decided to write something silly quickly orz.

-; ੈ♡˳ PHAINON

In the simplest terms, Phainon hugs with his everything. He's not shy to initiate skin-contact, will press himself to you accordingly — unless you voice out discomfort. He's diligent in wrapping his arms around your person securely, should you fancy melting in the bliss he offers. Though, his dexterity with hugs was honed through practice. In the beginning, the strength of a seasoned warrior had been more prevalent. A good amount of discussion (read: pleading to breathe) and experimentation snapped him out of the rush of pleasantries and reminded him of how precious a person he was dealing with.

Front hugs, back hugs, side hugs, bear hugs — he's okay with whatever you're comfortable with. His personal preference is going through all kinds of hugs he knows of manually ; first to shield you from all the evil that preys on your vulnerability, then scooping you up from the pull of gravity, a hearty squeeze to assure you of his protection, followed by a thrilling spin that will repel all bad thoughts out of your orbit. Until all the vestiges of weariness and stress have been replaced clean with the smiles he so adores.

Phainon is not one to be satisfied with short exchanges of warmth, the duration of these hugs tend to be quite long — or, as long as he can get away with before he has to commit to a Hero's responsibilities. Just as he initiates hugs with all of his soul, he expects the same when it comes to receiving them. Phainon prefers to be coddled, held with a promise of protection, ironically. Allow him to kneel and bring him close to your heart, weave your fingers through his hair, soothe the tension in his shoulders and he'll abandon the Flame-Chase altogether.

It's impossible to stir him in those moments, unless your safety happened to be at stake. As such, it's best for you to bid farewell to any other plans. Once he has memorized the nature of this exchange well, he goes beyond and utilizes it to deal with other nuisances. You cannot blame him, not when it has been proven that distracting you with a hug deters both the interference and yourself from paying heed to a mere passer-by. Sometimes his hug offers a bit less comfort and appears more as a shackle. Should you think to point this out, bear this in mind — your embrace is the last thread keeping his sanity intact.

-; ੈ♡˳ MYDEI

You must not care for your life at all, or at least, that's the thought Mydei found himself having when he was faced with the gesture. While the Crown Prince was not ignorant of the existence of a hug, he merely never had the opportunity to be properly acquainted with it. Not that it was necessary to know of it either, he can't win battles by hugging his opponents now, can he? As such, his reaction had been quite the spectacle when you initiated it. Begin by asking if he'd like a hug (throw in a ‘my prince’ at the end, sweetly), if his expression doesn't change then that means a ‘yes’, approach him calmly and wrap your arms around him next — be patient, he'll eventually reciprocate, given that you read the cues right.

If Mydei has to express affection, he'll do so in his own ways. It's already enough of an inconvenience that whenever he thinks of you, his head becomes blurred with clouds of emotions he's unable to decipher. That mushy sensation he feels inside whenever you have the audacity to hug him is just unfiltered agony to his mind. The journey to getting him less repulsed to the gesture has to be fueled by patience and understanding. Only when it clicks in his head that the feelings your hugs incite are not so dissimilar from the ones he gets by indulging in a plate of golden honeycakes does he warm up to the gesture.

Even then, Mydei is very particular about his preferences. Wave goodbye to the dream of spooning the prince any time soon, he's made it clear that that privilege is reserved for him alone. He'll always pull your head towards his chest and headlock you in place. If it's not possible to do so while standing, he'll sit down and gather you on his lap even — but he'll never allow his field of vision to be obstructed. Allowing this already renders you both vulnerable to attacks, he'll reason. He needs to remain vigilant, for the sake of your safety ; not that he'll translate the intention word by word.

Despite your efforts, you've discovered that ridding the prince of his stiffness is near-impossible, even if it's in private. His is not a life that's seen much comfort. Pay attention to the minute shifts in his eyes and you'll realize that the actual reason for his stilted posture, is because of the restraint he's exercising in unleashing his strength. It is a valid concern, he won't even need both of his hands to kill you. Death has rejected him countless times but awaits your departure in anticipation, he's merely mindful of its preying gaze.

-; ੈ♡˳ ANAXA

You are one fearless fellow if you initiated a hug with Anaxa, or you simply don't care about the fact that he's renowned as the scholar who most people are happy to avoid. The scholar in question would most likely call you an idiot though, you really need a thorough lesson in deciphering which men you must never approach. Not that he will be giving it, his time and energy are not to be wasted on such trivial concerns. Although he won't deny, with this brazen act, you've proven yourself to be a bit above the notion of ‘trivial’.

You think approaching the scholar is not so different from trying to befriend a cat, failure in the beginning is inevitable — only through persistence can you triumph. It's a task alone to try to acquaint yourself with him, getting him accustomed to physical affection might just be an acid test. The scholar has had no need for a rudimentary touch of another's skin, he'll say with a dignified hiss. But if you're observant, you'd know it's just a ruse to hide the depth of the depravation he's not allowing himself to acknowledge.

After much trial and error, when he finally bends to your efforts and accepts a hug, he's stiff and awkward, unsurprisingly. His hands wander as if settling on one place would burn his skin, face firmly hidden in the crook of your neck in what you can only assume is embarrassment. You would've teased him about the fierce flush on his ears and nape, if he hadn't ended the contact upon realizing his behavior. The scholar didn't dare face you for the next week, reflecting upon the incident vigorously.

Initially, his hugs were short, filled with muttered complaints to distract you from the firmness of his grip. The increasing average duration and his waning unwillingness towards the gesture did not go unnoticed by him at all. He knows the basic biological cause and it served as his rationale for quite a while. Yes, the reward system's activities are all there is to it, surely he possesses enough willpower to end this indulgence any time he wishes.

What he didn't anticipate though was you beating him to it, baffling him with your sudden consideration for his personal space. You are cruelty incarnate, conditioning him to this banal addiction and leaving him to deal with the consequences by himself? Now that is one preposterous claim to marvel at. It's wise if you cease pushing the man and retract your words. And if you don't? You're more than welcomed to repeat your jest at the firing point of his gun.

[bengals-barnesbabe]

My Type

~ a blurb I came up with at 3:33 am

TW: suggestive fluff & not exactly a blurb

₊ . ⋆ ⁺ ݃ ✳︎ 𓏸 ˙₊ ❊ 𓈒 𓇬 ⁺ ⋆ . ₊

Hard Knocks, the show surround your favorite team that has either become the bane of your existence or an absolute treasure. Either way, one clip of your personal friend, Joe Burrow, driving a golf cart has yet to leave your mind.

The golf cart itself wasn’t special. Nor were the practice outfits of the four players riding in it. It was just Joe. And the way he drove it.

It was carefree, fluid, and almost too much. Not too much for him, obviously; you haven’t seen anything that’s been proven to be too much for him. It was too much for you.

He just looked so soft. Warm Bengals beanie atop his blonde curls with only the pink-tinted flesh of his earlobe poking out. His strong arms covered a black long-sleeved tee. It was cute.

What wasn't cute was the way his thick thighs filled his grey pants to the point that you could see each muscle in his long legs. Or his defined jawline and cold-flushed cheeks that sit on the border between just hot and ridiculously hot.

You'd never felt this way about the quarterback. In the years of knowing him and being friends, it never crossed your mind that Joey Burrow was seductively handsome. He'd always been handsome but like a picture-perfect handsome. You could tell why he was a heartthrob; you just never felt the intense heart-pumping yourself.

Then you watched him lick his lips while reversing a golf cart, slide his left hand into his pocket, and drive off with one hand on the wheel.

One simple act after another, but done in a sequence with all the additional factors to create a moment that had you dumbstruck.

Dumbstruck and questioning every interaction you'd had with him as you watched the 12-second clip over and over and over again. One video cannot change how you see someone you've known for years with such ease.

And you were right. It wasn't just the Hard Knocks clip; it was the many saved videos of him mic'ed up on your phone, the overwatched and much-appreciated clip of his 47-yard rushing touchdown, the infamous Body Armour ads, the Bose ads, the Alo clip of him just running that take up space on your iPhone 14 Pro and show no sign of being deleted.

You thought you were in the clear because you never saved the videos or edits of him being outwardly seductive and hot. No photos of him shirtless or with sweat dripping down his beefy body as he works out. No, you started away from them, always at arm's length with items of temptation.

Or were you?

"What are you watching?" His deep timbre causes you to throw your phone in the most guilty manner. You both watch wide-eyed as it bounces on the carpet until it's thankfully faced down in the middle of his living room.

Joe turns to you, his face growing red as he holds back his laugh. "Was it really that bad?" He asks, releasing his giggles hostage.

Instead of responding, his cute chuckles fill your ears and warm your heart, making it thump just a little bit harder. Because since when was his laugh so cute?

The sound of your name flowing off his pink, pouty lips and the way your heart skips a beat brings you back to the present.

"Huh?"

"Huh? That's all you can say?" He smirks, looks down at the phone, then at you, then back to the phone.

The next thing you know, you're both diving for the phone. It's almost comedic how panicked your face looks compared to him as he swipes your phone and turns it over like buried treasure. All the dramatics just to see his face fall because you have auto-lock on, which is the biggest feeling of relief off your shoulders.

"I was so close." He sighs.

"Sorry, Joey Wheels, you just weren't fast enough." You chuckled taking the phone from his outreached hand.

He chuckles lightly, "You know, I am gonna figure out exactly what had you so awestruck." As another stroke of luck, his phone starts ringing. "Just not today."

~ Night of Broncos @ Bengals Game ~

You were stressed but relieved following the aftermath of what that game did to you. Especially being at the stadium, it was like every minute that passed would end you. You like being kept on your toes, but not that much. As soon as the game was over and you could relax, you got a simple text from Joe.

MVP: stick around, let me drive you home

It was innocent; it wouldn't be the first time he's given you a ride home after a game, and it probably wouldn't be the last. You always preferred public transport because of how close you live to the city, so his offer was out of pure generosity.

But why did such a simple text reignite that same anxiety and tension as you had during the game?

Was it because of these confused feelings you've kept in for a week?

Or the potential conversations that could be had over the 10-minute ride?

Then you thought back to his pregame fit and visibly shivered, but it had nothing to do with the slight chill in the stadium.

Joe walked into the stadium in an all-black outfit: simple black jeans, black sneakers, a brown and black checkered bottega jacket, and one of his signature black shades. He looked the most fuckable, you have ever seen him- and this was after his slim shady tank top look.

Now you're imagining sitting next to him in his sleek Porsche, his jacket unzipped to the middle of his chest, definitely exposing his sexy-ass idea not to wear a shirt underneath it. But that's not even the worst part; you can keep yourself calm enough by just not making eye contact.

No, the worst part is now, his sleeves are rolled up to his elbows, the shades sit on his head, and his fucking hand is inches away from your thigh.

Your exposed thigh, because after hearing how nice the weather would be for the game, you decided to put on some heavily distressed black skinny jeans. His fingers are practically causing their own electrical current as they graze your soft brown skin. And to top it off, he's wearing his signature smirk.

Because he always knows exactly what he's doing and how to get a reaction out of you.

"Out with it, Bur- His hand slips, and he grasps your thigh during a sharp break at a red light, then he looks over at you.

"Sorry about that," He smiles, lying through his perfectly pearly teeth. "Didn't want anything to happen to you, pretty girl."

You stared at him in pure disbelief. “You did that on purpose.”

“Now why would I do that?”

“Because you know something.” He looks away, but you catch the light chuckle he lets out. “I don’t appreciate you torturing me just because you don’t feel the same way.”

“I never-

“You didn’t have to, just-

Before you know it, his lips are on yours. Here you are, sitting at a red light, surrounded by the oddly quiet city, with Joe’s pillowy soft lips melting against your own.

When he breaks away, the light is green but the only thing moving is his hand against your cheek.

“I do feel the same way. I always have. It’s you who’s been taking over a year to figure it out.” He says softly brushing his thumb over your lips.

You lean in almost closing the distance between you. “I really like you, Joe.”

The light turns red again, effectively blending with the bright blush across his face. “Thank god, cause I’ve been dressing like a complete slut to games trying to get your attention. I was debating just showing up to your place just sweaty and shirtless.”

The car turns into a bubble of laughter as you lean back against the window trying to clam yourself down with the coolness from the outside. The two of you sit in a comfortable silence for the rest of the ride. You’re watching the city lights pass by while he drives safely down the streets, slow enough because he knows how much you love the view and so he can unashamedly glimpse over at your beauty.

Minutes later you’re walking hand in hand up to your apartment. “You know…” You bite back a smirk as you reach the door.

“What?” He raises a brow, pulling your hand to his lips.

The simple act warms your skin in a way he wouldn’t be able to notice unless you were grinning like a fool. Which you were.

You can’t help but giggle your next words out. “Your plan of showing up sweaty and shirtless would’ve worked too.”

He lightly scoffs with a timid smile on his face. “Same goes for you, princess. If I had known me driving one handed turned you on so much… well you wouldn’t have thrown your phone across the room a few weeks back.” He smirks cupping your jaw and placing a light kiss on your forehead.

“You’re such a tease.”

He chuckles darkly, tilting your head and leaning down until you’re sharing one breath. “That’s the whole point, sweetheart.”

⤜♡→

main masterlist

[inotaku-talkz]

I cannot stress this enough.,,...... baby daddy daisuke 😣😣 I KNOW U GET A LOT FOR HIM BUT LORD HIM AS UR BD IS JUST AHRHFHHHH

*drowns*

a/n: sighs I have resigned to my fate😔

banners by @cafekitsune

The monster’s gone, he’s on the run and your Daddy’s here (Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful boy)

Warnings: allusions to sex, no actually sex tho, fluff, angst, semi-canon compliant (Asshole Jimmy)

a/n: I search up what dad is in Filipino. If there are ANY mistakes please let me know :(

You met Daisuke in high school. You were semi-popular around the school, but Daisuke had all the high school fame.

You both met when you were 17, in a holding room in your junior year. He had seen you around the school, so he decided to talk to you. 

Little did both of you know, a talk led to a wave in the hallway and then to skipping classes to ditch school. He asked you to prom as friends but ended up asking you to be his girlfriend there. You obviously said yes.

That was 2 years ago.

Where were you and Daisuke now? Well, Daisuke accepted an internship in space under his mother’s suggestion and you were…

Down on earth, unknowingly pregnant at the time.

You and your two-year-old boy, Tomas were living with Daisuke’s parents. They welcomed you with open arms when you told them about your pregnancy. They never questioned you about whether Daisuke was the father or not, they knew that the child growing inside of you was their son’s, their grandchildren.

Tomas Jaurez was a bright-eyed boy. He was identical to Daisuke. From the nose to the lips and eyes, but the boy does share your eye color and your face shape and such.

But every time you look at Tomas, you think of Daisuke and of how he doesn’t even have an inkling of a clue that Tomas exists. You wish that you had taken that pregnancy test sooner, maybe Daisuke could have stayed down on earth, where it’s safe and he’s with his family.

Thoughts plagued his mind. You, his mother, his father, and for some reason he keeps seeing a younger version of himself, but the appearance is slightly skewed.

The boy would just stare at him, but this time the boy reached out. He said only one word.

“Tatay.”

He’s jolting awake next. Waking up in the backseat of a spacey SUV. A woman sat on the farther side of the backseat. An authoritative look on her face as she coughs to get his attention.

“Mr. Juarez.” She kept her eyes on him.

“The Pony Express would appreciate if you stayed quiet about the contents of your arrival.” 

That’s right, Jimmy attempted to get Daisuke to the closed-off vent to get to Anya. When Daisuke refused, Jimmy blew up on him. If not for Swansea who managed to wake up in time to shove Daisuke into the escape pod, Daisuke would have ended up dead.

“The higher-ups will compensate you for your silence. Your family is already informed of your arrival and its reasoning.” She took his silence as compliance.

He just nodded. Wanting to get home to his mom, his dad, and you. His beautiful, amazing girlfriend. His girlfriend who waited two years for him to return home. 

Daisuke’s coming home. Your boyfriend is coming home. 

His father spent all morning making his favorite meals, his mother spent all morning cleaning the house, and you, you were preparing a way to tell Daisuke about Tomas.

But right now, Tomas was in Daisuke’s old room taking a nap. You softly shut the door when you hear the front door open and then close.

Hearing the exclaims of an excited mother and cheers of an ecstatic father. You saw him. He looked worn and battered like he had been through hell and back twice.

Daisuke locked eyes with you. The moment his mother released him, he took you into his arms. 

”Oh, baby! I’ve missed you so much!” He looks drained, but he manages to have the strength to squeeze you so hard and plant dozens and dozens of kisses on every inch of your face.

“Daisuke! Oh, god it’s been too long!” You hugged him back, two years' worth of unreleased love and despair boiling over.

His parents watched the scene unfold in front of them. Their son reunited with his one love, but one thing remained.

Tomas.

You rub the tears out of your eyes. You brace his shoulders. “Daisuke. I want you to meet someone.”

Confusion painted every inch of his face but his attention snapped the stairs at one word.

“Mama.” 

A boy a little older than two years old stood at the stairs rubbing his eyes. He must have woken up from taking a nap and went looking for his mom. 

The boy walks up to you, arms outstretched. You take the child into your arms. Your eyes meet Daisuke’s, fear and guilt sit in deep pools in your gaze.

“Daisuke. This is Tomas. Our son.” You spoke slowly.

Son? You were pregnant and raising his kid for the two years he had been in space?

“Oh, baby.” A sob tears him apart.

“If I had known, I would have stayed.” He takes you both into his embrace.

“Tatay?” The boy looks at Daisuke with a curious expression on his face.

With a broken voice, Daisuke pats the boy on the head. 

“Tatay. I’m here. Your Tatay is here forever.” 

Tomas smiles, giggling and clapping his hands together before wrapping his arms around his Tatay’s neck. 

Daisuke takes Tomas from your arms and holds him close, he wraps an arm around your shoulder. Embracing his first hug with his girl and his son.

[owliellder]

Two's A Crowd

College Bully! Leon Kennedy x fem! Reader

MDNI 18+

(Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5)

Description: College is proving to be a lot harder than you imagined. You cannot fail this math class. So when you've tried everything else, a well-known student is recommended to you by your professor for tutoring lessons, not really leaving you with much of a choice but to work with him.

Warnings: Not proofread, No Use of Y/N, Dub-Con, Unprotected Sex, Bullying, Yelling, Cursing

Tags: College AU, Bully! Leon, Shy! Reader, both are in their early 20's, Leon is Rude AF in the beginning, Loss of Virginity, Oral Sex, Fingering, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Additional Tags to be Added

Author's Note: Yay!! New multi-chapter fic in honor of 800 followers!!

I'm a sucker for tropes and mean Leon is one I can't keep out of my head. If you're not good at math then this is the fic for you! (also don't mind me slipping some Sky lore in here...)

Cross-posted onto AO3

Chapter 1

Growing up, college had always been a big dream of yours, leaving you fantasizing day in and out about all the possibilities that would open up, along with actually getting to live through the renowned “college experience”.

In reality, college was a lot harder than you were expecting. Your parents had told you to jump right into it after high school, fearing taking a gap year would ruin your good streak. The stress was starting to get to you and it was only a semester into your freshman year. All the tests, projects, and general studying really wore down on your mental health, not to mention you were failing the one math class you had.

You couldn’t tell your parents, no, they’d probably have a heart attack, especially since that math class was a prerequisite to another class that you needed to take. They were already worried enough that you hadn’t picked a major yet, so who knows how they’d take the news that you were failing right off the bat.

It was hard enough that you were feeling homesick. This was the first time you’d ever been this far away from home, studying at a university when you would’ve been perfectly content going to a community college closer to home. Your roommate was nice, but the two of you weren’t growing any closer than mere acquaintances, so it always felt awkward to just exist in your own dorm room.

Your eating habits worsened with the lack of any real food within five miles of campus. Sure there were a couple fast food chains on the campus itself, but they closed incredibly early. By the time you finished studying, which was around six in the evening, it had already closed. Not to mention that when they were open, the lines were comically long. University food was out of the question after you got violently ill from their “chicken nuggets”, so you were left with the little money your parents provided once a week to order takeout or make quick trips to the store to buy a frozen meal. Only one, since the mini fridge in your dorm was almost always occupied by your roommates stuff.

Everything was so exhausting and you were way out of your comfort zone having to use the community bathrooms for all your hygienic routines. Walking in always made you feel like you were interrupting a meeting in the president’s oval office with how many nasty looks you were given when all you were trying to do was brush your teeth.

The first thing you saw whenever you opened up Canvas was a massive F staring you down from the little box that comprised the majority of your math assignments and tests, making you feel less than worthless. This one semester alone helped you understand why so many people dropped out, this was hard.

By now you’d already gone to your math professor multiple times asking for redos or extra credit work. He was probably sick of seeing you since you showed up after almost every single assignment’s grades were submitted.

“Heeeyyy, Mr. Lebovic..” You said after knocking your knuckle against his open door to grab his attention. “Listen, about that last quiz, I-”

He cut you off with a wave of his hand before gesturing towards one of the chairs sitting in front of his desk. You hurried to sit down, watching nervously as he slowly pulled his eyes off his computer and onto you. “I get it, you don’t need to explain yourself.” His relaxed tone and faint smile was enough to ease your nerves a bit, letting your shoulders slump with a sigh. “You’ve been trying really hard, I can easily recognize that.”

You nodded eagerly, licking your dry lips as you opened your mouth to speak, only to be cut off again. “I’ve been looking into studying options that might help you. Resources are scarce for this material, but I think I finally have a tutor to help you out.” 

A wave of relief washed over you at the mention of tutor. Maybe you wouldn’t have to face the wrath of your parent’s disappointment after all! “Oh.. o-okay…” you stuttered, eyebrows furrowing as you silently beckoned him to continue.

“I teach another math class, it’s higher level, but I have a student in there that’s just taken up tutoring the material you’re learning.” Your professor seemed just as happy as you were about the opportunity. “His name is Leon Kennedy, he’s got one of the study rooms in the library from three to five in the afternoon on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays.”

It took you a second to process everything Mr. Lebovic was telling you before you scrambled to pull out a sticky note and a pen to write all the information down on. You heard the older man chuckle softly, looking over at him when he held out a small piece of paper to you. “I wrote it down already for you, don’t worry.” You wished you could’ve thanked him tenfold, but his office hours were closed for the day now, so you said a quick goodbye and hurried back to your dorm, holding onto the piece of paper like a lifeline.

Contrary to what your math professor thinks, you knew the name “Leon Kennedy”. You had a couple friends that you hung out with occasionally out in the grass in front of the science building and they’d brought him up before. The few vague bits of info that you’d heard weren’t flattering, painting this Leon in quite a bad light; the stereotypical jock in a frat flying by on a full-ride scholarship. However, he was your saving grace now and you needed to develop more of an unbiased opinion of him if he was going to help you raise your grade from an F.

“Yeesh, sorry I’m not better at math or I would’ve helped you.” One of your friends, Sky, spoke up as they read the piece of paper your professor gave you yesterday from over your shoulder. “Even if you were better at math, I still wouldn’t trust you.” Ella, your other friend, laughed out.

“Ha ha, yeah, Sky failed math four times. Big whoop.” Sky waved their hands dramatically before walking over to sit down next to Ella in the dead grass. “Seriously though, you’re better off taking a failing grade and dealing with your parents. Kennedy is the devil incarnate.”

“The devil incarnate sounds easier to put up with than my parents, so I’ll take my chances..” You grumbled, taking a seat on a medium-sized rock close to the pair. “Maybe he’s turning a new leaf? Deciding to tutor?” 

Sky crossed her arms and rolled her eyes which made Ella elbow them in the side before giving you a sympathetic smile. “Maybe so, but please just be careful. I don’t want you having to put up with some jackass that has an ego bigger than Texas.” 

You nodded with a slight frown, moving your foot side to side lazily to push the grass blades around. You didn’t even think to consider the repercussions of studying with some random junior. “I’m sure it’ll be alright. Besides, just tell Sky and I if he’s giving you any trouble. I know damn well no man likes to put up with two women yelling in his face.” Sky nodded and pointed to Ella for added dramatics. “Yeah, and I bite. My top six teeth are porcelain so that shit hurts. Trust me.”

Your friends never failed to make you laugh, a slight resolve in a pool full of worries, you suppose. “Don’t worry, you guys’ll be the first to know if Leon is mean.”

“Good. Now, when’re you gonna go see the guy?” Sky rested their arms on their knees before looking up at you. “Uh.. in a couple hours I guess. I already made the appointment.” Your response seemed to surprise both of your friends, giving them a confused look in response to their shocked ones. “Is that.. Is that not a good time?”

“No no, just.. I thought you would’ve maybe taken a little longer to go and see him.” Ella shrugged, reaching a hand up to scratch behind their neck. “Proud of you, taking the initiative like that.” She then looked at her phone before pulling herself off the ground with a small groan. “I got class in a couple minutes. Good luck with the frat boy.” 

She patted your shoulder as she walked off towards the larger building on campus, leaving you and Sky alone for the rest of the time. Part of you wished both of your friends could walk you to the library when the time came, but having Sky was enough. “So.. Leon’s bad bad?” You needed a bit more clarification on the guy you were going to spend one-on-one time with, something to calm you down after running through countless scenarios in your head.

“He’s not all bad, 'least I don't think. I’ve exchanged a few ‘hello’s’ and ‘excuse me’s’ with him here and there since we apparently frequent the same building.” Sky scooted over to the rock you were sitting on, placing the back of their head on your legs. A couple brown leaves blew over from a nearby tree which they grabbed and crunched with their hand. “I haven’t personally experienced any bad happenings around him, but he is part of a pretty notoriously rowdy frat, so you have to promise me that you’ll only study with him on campus and never go to that frat house or any frat house in general, alright?”

Sky pointed up at you, poking the underside of your chin which made you laugh again and swat their hand away. “As much as I rave about wanting to have the stereotypical college experience, going to a frat house was never part of my daydreaming.”

“Good. Keep it that way.” They switched their fingers to give you a quick thumbs up before letting their arm flop down into their lap, eyes closing with a sigh. “Anyways, besides all that, wanna go get some food? I don’t have another class today and you’ve got about an hour and a half to spare, so actually you have no choice. Get up.”

You stood up with a shake of your head once Sky pushed off of your legs who stood up as well with a small stretch. “Don’t burn me at the stake, but I kinda want grocery store sushi. I’m feeling lucky.”

“Please don’t.” You sighed, pocketing the piece of paper before beginning to follow behind Sky as they started to walk across the grass. 

After the two of you shared a sandwich from some random shop not too far off campus, Sky walked with you up to the library, stopping just before the front desk. They agreed to not wander in with you under the condition that you’ll go to their dorm straight after to discuss details.

To say you were nervous was an understatement. Most of what you heard about this guy meant he was bad news, though you really didn’t have much of a choice when it came to seeing him. Like your math professor said, there weren’t a lot of options when it came to studying the material you were learning. Sure you had the internet and other students in the class, but you preferred the idea of a tutor since you’d already exhausted yourself trying to follow along with various youtube videos. You needed the in-person teaching, it just stuck better in your head that way.

Slowly starting to walk, you made your way over to the study rooms lining the back of the library. The rooms seemed pretty private with the only window being on the door, which had glass nearly top to bottom. Thankfully the rooms were numbered and Leon had texted you which room to go to when you made the appointment with him, you had no idea what he looked like and you didn’t want to look like a creep eyeballing people through the door until you hopefully found the right person.

Standing off to the side, you could see the number you were looking for sitting above the door, taking a brief moment to collect yourself and hype yourself up to talk to someone who didn’t have the greatest reputation. Set aside everything you’ve heard and just hope for the best..

You took in a deep breath as you strode over to the door, glancing inside through the window before knocking to let him know you were there. The table was angled off more to the left so you didn’t immediately see him until he leaned over the table to see who had knocked. Confidence left you as soon as you made eye contact with Leon due to the groan you could hear through the door. It took you a couple seconds, but you eventually managed to get your body to work with you, hand turning the handle to let yourself in.

“-the last thing I need..” You caught the end of his little rant to himself as you opened the door. The saying “fake it ‘till you make it” is harder than it sounds since your entire body decided to betray you, deciding that shrinking in was the best move. Quietly, you shuffled over to sit across from him at the table, placing your backpack in your lap in some weird way to provide comfort in this situation.

“You weren’t supposed to show up.” Leon grumbled, sitting far back in the tilted chair as his feet lifted the front end of the chair slightly. His arms were crossed and he was giving you probably the nastiest look you’ve ever seen, next to your parents, of course. All you did was sit there giving him a blank stare. It was obvious what he’d said, yet the sheer forwardness of that snide comment had you more than confused. “What?-”

“You weren’t supposed to show up.” Apparently he felt the need to repeat himself with some added bite, barely letting you get a word in. “No one ever shows up to these shitty tutor- whatever the fucks.”

Wow. Okay. “Uh..” You didn’t even know what to say to that. It completely caught you off guard. You’d run through countless ways this interaction would go in your head, but this wasn’t one of those ways. The two of you sat in a very tense silence with Leon just glaring at you from across the table, continuing to rock back and forth in the chair.

Without uncrossing his arms, Leon lifted a hand and waved it around slightly while shaking his head. “Are you actually still gonna sit here orrr…?” The sound of his voice finally snapped you out of shock, causing you to shoot your gaze down to your backpack, fumbling with its partially broken zipper. “I-.. Mr. Lebovic recommended you..?”

You pulled out a few of your failed assignments from your bag before setting them down on the table with shaky hands, keeping your eyes glued to the papers to avoid that burning stare the man in front of you has. “I need-.. I need help..?”

“Do you?” Leon let the chair fall forward, his sarcastic tone starting to make your whole body tremble. “You don’t sound like you do.” He snatched one of your assignments from the table and held it up, pursing his lips as he studied the various red marks made on it closely. You chose to not respond to that, letting your hands rest on top of your backpack so you had something to squeeze.

He turned the page around, the sound of the paper wobbling the only thing you could hear right after the sound of the central heat blowing through the vent in the room. Suddenly, Leon started chuckling to himself, shaking his head incredulously as he flipped the paper back and forth a couple times before letting it fall back to the table. “This is terrible!” His laugh grew louder as he tilted his body to the side to pull out his phone, taking a picture of the assignments you’d put on the table. 

How on earth were you supposed to react to that other than just sitting quietly? He was actually making fun of you right to your face. Hell, he might as well point and laugh if he’s going to be this brasen. 

The most you could muster up was a quiet yet high-pitched “... huh?” in response to him. This whole ordeal was spiraling a little too fast for you to keep up with. You were expecting to put up with some grown man with a bratty attitude or even just a very uninterested, not all there jock with how Leon’s been described to you, not blatant bullying.

“Huh?” He mocked, taking one last look at his phone while loudly sucking on his teeth before pocketing it again. “Anyways, this is actually sad. How are you managing to fuck simple math up like this?” He roughly grabbed all the papers on the table and stacked them before partially tossing them back at you, some slipping onto the floor. “You’re too far gone, even I can’t fix that.”

You let out a gasp when the papers were tossed at your face, scrambling to catch some of them. Pushing the chair back, you leaned over to grab the few that fell on the floor, desperately holding back tears. “Please, you don’t understand.” You pleaded, voice cracking as you tried your best not to start crying in front of him. “I-I need to pass this class. I’m passing everything else, I just can’t keep up with this one!” You were speed-talking to try and argue your case, sitting back up with the small pile of papers that you struggled to stack properly.

Leon started rocking back in his chair again, arms back across his chest as he watched you with squinted eyes. The corners of his lips soon turned up into a smirk, taking in your sorry state before rolling his eyes with a dramatic groan. “Alright, alright, stop whining, jesus..” He cleared his throat, letting his head fall over the back of the chair. “I’ll help you only because I feel bad for you.” It’s not like he was going to admit that he was being forced to be a tutor, no one needs leverage over him like that

You couldn’t help but give a small smile despite his implication. It was a start. “And I’m not gonna do it today, either.” Well, the sooner the better, but still, it’s a start.

He then stood up from the chair, fixing his jacket with a sigh. “If you show up even a minute late on Friday, I’m not helping” and before you even had a chance to reply, he walked out of the room, the door shutting with a slam which made you flinch. Luckily, you were a very punctual person when it came to this kind of stuff. This was important, so if you had to show up early, so be it. You hurriedly shoved your assignments back into your backpack, not even fully zipping it up before rushing out of the study room, back through the library, and to the dorms.

“He said that?!” Sky yelled, quickly wiping their hand over their mouth to quiet themself once you shushed them. “I don’t really feel comfortable with you going to another ‘study session’ with that guy if he’s just gonna bully you.”

“I wouldn’t call it bullying-”

“He was bullying you.”

“OKAY! So what if he was?!” You fell back onto Sky’s bed with a sigh, arms splayed out with your legs dangling off the side. “I can handle it. As long as I get my grade up, who cares?”

Sky sat down next to you on their bed, giving you a sad look as you sat yourself up with your elbows. “I care. So does Ella. You shouldn’t put up with that just for a grade. I’m sure if you explain to your professor and-”

“And what? Tell him that I’m a grown woman getting bullied over something I should know by now?” You sat yourself up fully now, leaning forward to place your elbows on your thighs as your head rested in your hands. “It’s only until finals are over and we’re already halfway through October. Maybe I won’t even need that much time, maybe I’m just missing one simple… math move and it’ll get the gears in my brain moving again.”

You tilted your head to the side to look at Sky, head now resting only in your right hand as you took in their annoyed look. “Trust me. I can handle this.”

“If you say so.” They ran their fingers through her hair before looking away from you, directing their attention forward to stare off at nothing. “Just remember that I bite and I’m not afraid to use my fake chompers on that no good-”

“I don’t wanna think about escalations right now, but thank you.” You chuckled, playfully nudging Sky with your free hand before moving it back to hold your head up with the other. Though you were trying to convince Sky on this, you were mostly just trying to convince yourself that you could handle this. Handle Leon and his.. alluring charm..

Only until finals, maybe even sooner.

[strawberrystepmom]

gojo x f!reader. gojo and reader are in an semi-established relationship although he is referred to as boyfriend in this. cw: food, tantanmen is a spicy ramen soup. hurt/comfort if you squint, bad day lamentations, and one of my personal favorite gojo facts: man hates spicy food. i also hc him as a picky eater so here we go.

wc 1.5k | divider by cafekitsune

“I want tantanmen.”

Satoru’s bottom lip begins sticking out as soon as he hears the first letter of his most dreaded of your post-stressful day cravings leave your mouth.  

The bane of his existence - spicy food. It overwhelms his senses, a fact you’re well aware of, making it a rarity that you would even ask. That’s how he knows today has been capital-R rough for you and although he wants to help make your difficult day better, there’s hesitation in his step and he stops you on the train platform to put his hands on your shoulders. His grip is just firm enough to bring you comfort and you glance up at him looking so dejected he almost thinks better of his next question. Consideration - something he is not always the best at doing - be damned, he cannot stop himself before the words slip out.  

“Are you sure you don’t want something else instead?”

Hurt flashes across your face and you don’t bother to hide it. Every single one of your boyfriend’s whims is surrendered to no matter how ridiculous it is, trips and meals and sex positions and a million other tiny things you do to make him happy despite his insistence he doesn’t need them. Sure, it’s unfair for you to expect the same in return given you do it with no expectation of reciprocation but for once it would be nice to not have your choices questioned.

“You told me I could get anything I wanted and it was your treat. Are you changing your mind?”  

You raise a brow, slacken your jaw, and harden your gaze that is pointed upward in his direction. 

“I’ve had a rough day, Satoru. All I need is something so spicy it makes me cry.”

The tears threatening to fall from your lash line aren’t fake or for “getting your own way” purposes, you genuinely feel like you’re on the brink of tears and have all day. A scolding from Yaga, a disagreement regarding curriculum with Utahime via intense text message exchange, blatant disrespect from your students that they have yet to apologize - every bad moment piled up into something heavy to carry that weighs down on your chest. Thankfully, Satoru knows you well enough to be able to tell that you are being honest about the way you feel and arguing is futile.

“Fine,” he agrees with a loud exhale. “But on the way home we’re going to stop and get something edible to people who aren’t crazy, okay?”

Reaching for his hand, you nod and snuggle into his arm. Lacing your fingers between his, the stress visibly melts from you and a minuscule part of him feels bad for putting up an argument to your wishes at all. Is this really how he’s going to act when you are so undeniably sweet to him when you want to be? How many of his whims do you give into without having to think about it at all? Sighing, he leans toward you and kisses the top of your head, crowding you closer against his body. 

“You’re not going to make me try it this time?”

“No. I only did that once and besides, their menu is big. You are bound to find something you like if you just look.”

Giggling, you cling to his side and shrug playfully. The distinct shine of tears in your eyes has dissipated and your smile seems warmer than earlier, making him feel slightly less guilty for his blunder. 

Guilt isn’t something that he really dwells on often, as impermanent as the rest of his emotions tend to be, but it’s different when it’s you. Keeping you happy is just about the only thing he hasn’t been perfect at on the first attempt yet he keeps trying and figuring it out a little more every day. He figures you out a little more every day, honestly. It’s what keeps him coming back.

“But I like eating the same thing as you.” Satoru pouts again and you roll your eyes, squeezing your arm that is wrapped around his bicep. “I know but sometimes it doesn’t hurt either of us to try something new or different from the other.”

He hums his disbelief and the two of you walk alongside one another toward the gate.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ordering your spicy soup with a smile at the front counter while your boyfriend situates the table the two of you will be sitting at, you check over your shoulder once before leaning in the direction of the young woman taking your order.

“I have a really weird request.”

She nods politely and you take a deep breath, knowing how rude it is to ask for changes to menu items when there are so many. Despite the impoliteness, you feel obligated to give him a little break while taking into consideration the one he has given you tonight.

“So the tantanmen…is there any way I could get just the broth and noodles without anything else?” The young woman blinks at you unenthusiastically and you straighten your shoulders, putting on your most winning smile. “How about a child’s serving with less spice? Is that something you could do?”

Wordlessly, she glances over your shoulder at the table your over six and a half feet tall man sits at in search of a child that could possibly need this kind of accommodation for their food. She spots none, only your boyfriend who is grinning down at his phone and laughing to himself.

“It’s for him. He doesn’t do spice very well, I know that’s ridiculous but we always order the same thing and I understand if you can’t do it. I just had to ask.”

She hums and presses the buttons on the screen in front of her, turning it to show you. One order of soup, extra spicy for you. One order of soup, just broth and no spice for Gojo. Gratefully, you bow your head and she plays it off with a smile. Even she can’t be terribly annoyed at a couple that clearly has figured out one another’s whims and she instructs you to go and sit at your table to await your order.

Sliding in next to him on the same side of the booth, as always, you grin and he puts his phone down immediately to wrap his arm around your shoulder. 

“What’d you order me?”

You shrug playfully and he gasps.

“You know I’ll simply go on hunger strike if you got me something spicy…” he trails off and you laugh, reaching up to tug on his earlobe the way you always do when he’s running his mouth. “You’ll just have to see what surprise I have in store.”

The two of you chit chat for a few minutes but the soup comes more quickly than you expected. Satoru’s face lights up when his eyes glance down at a bowl full of silky broth, pulling apart his chopsticks delightedly. It’s the same thing you have, just a little different and exactly how he likes it.

“Oh, you shouldn’t have!”

Laughing, you shake your head and follow his lead, glancing down into your own steaming bowl of relief. Opening your chopsticks, breaking them apart, giving thanks for the meal, they’re all as natural as breathing at this point and you smile at him again as he glances down into your bowl.

The broth of your soup is as red as anything he has ever seen.

“That looks like the fire of Hell,” he scoffs, scooping broth into his mouth and swallowing quickly. 

You take a sip from your spoon and sigh in relief, shoulders relaxing into a natural position instead of curved forward sadly. Despite his earlier protests, there’s nothing he’d rather do than sit here and watch you eat your troubles away, pinkies of both of your free hands touching below the table. 

“It just might be.”

The spice makes you sniffle and he’s quick to pick up a napkin, dabbing at the tip of your nose to make sure no dribbles have occurred. This is another habit he has picked up after all this time watching you challenge yourself to meals he wouldn’t touch if he had to. Wiping your nose and cheeks and making sure you drink water.

“Thank you for treating me.”

Leaning over your bowl, you slurp a mouthful of noodles and chew it thoughtfully. He watches your mouth and jaw move, reaching up to cup your face but stopping himself from kissing you with your mouth full. It wouldn’t be the first time but that damned spicy broth is all over your lips and he won’t take the risk as badly as he wants to.

“Thanks for letting me, you freak of nature.”

Giggling, you shrug and lean into his touch.

“It takes one to know one.”

No argument from him.

[cocoa-rococo]

i CANNOT stop thinking about the watson and sherlock dynamic from the awakened. there's something so utterly vulnerable about it.

like. sherlock, in the mildest terms, is Fucking Going Through It. lost his mom, is on poor terms with his brother, and is grappling with the idea of this otherworldly, cosmic entity connected to this case not only existing, but being real enough to influence his mind, the one place he considers -- perhaps on some level -- sacred, or at the very least, an important part of himself. he is desperately trying to keep a grasp on himself and what he knows to be true, on top of keeping strictly on professional terms with watson instead of letting him in, even when it's obvious he's very dear to him.

this whole case has him going off the deep end and sinking further and further into this mystery. the fact that he doesn't feel in control of what's happening -- or even know what's happening, really -- is the one thing he's terrified of, in a way. he's scared that if he goes mad, or loses his mind, he won't have anything left of him. it's why it's one of the most pressing options during his confrontation with rochester.

it's also why his announcement to rochester of "i have made a friend," is so oddly tender in that scene. because if nothing else -- if he's either mad or still sane, if he knows that this is the end, if nothing else really does matter -- that much is true, as well. and that's not even getting into the ending and final cutscene of the game.

and watson! oh my gracious, watson. watson has no idea what the fuck he's doing or why he's involved in any of this, how he got dragged into this mess, only that he's following sherlock to help him and this case. watson underplays himself so much in this investigation, thinking himself as a coward in so many aspects, even when he's shown multiple times to be braver than he thinks; lying to gygax to eventually get the key, standing up to mycroft, being willing to follow sherlock practically into hell to help him, even if it makes him uncomfortable on multiple layers. he's trying to keep himself put together enough for the both of them.

he practically word vomits onto wolff in edelweiss about how he's stressed and confused and sort of wants a strand of a normal life again, and is just. so very clearly involved in this only because sherlock asked him to be, and how -- even when he CANNOT explain why -- he finds himself thrilled by it all and alive. and he does this only because wolff will forget almost immediately!!! and watson can act like nothing happened and he didn't say something absolutely devastating!!!!!

it's also why his standing up to mycroft for sherlock is also very tender. his comment of essentially, "i know you know him, i just wished you respected him". watson has no IDEA why the fuck he's following sherlock this far, but he respects him and his wishes, and cares for him enough to know when to help and when to step away, ("you asked me to intervene if i saw you cracking. this is me intervening!")

they are both so desperately trying to cling onto each other for this whole case, because they're BOTH damaged people trying to hold onto the only thing they each know to be true. they're each other's fail-safes, only going to stop if the other honestly -- sincerely -- wants to, but they won't!

it's also exactly why they manage to survive this ordeal together (not win; you don't win in a lovecraftian horror, you survive). they both are living in the past -- and would probably wallow there if allowed -- but the other brings them into the present and centers them on what's important.

[adambja]

✨Law of Assumption | Reality Creation✨

The ULTIMATE Post on Tumblr - CREDITS GOES TO @X3N97 ON TWITTER

I offer tapes and coaching btw ;) the self-concept tape is guaranteed 100% 🫶🏻

The only post you would ever need.

𝘙𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘻𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘦 𝘱𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳

DISCLAIMER:

I am a Neville Goddard follower, it took me 2 YEARS to understand the law fully well. Through trial and tribulations it FINALLY clicked for me. I do NOT just follow any YT coach, only who understand the law, so my knowledge might contradict what you know but I hope you get something out of this thread, I want you to use your common sense, have an open mind, you never know, it might be of benefit for you.

Had to lay that out there, let's continue with the post.....

PART 1

𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝘼𝙬𝙖𝙠𝙚𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜

Wake up! It is time for you to realize you were the operant power all along, life never "happened" to you! It is happening through you! You can realize this by seeing how life is going around for you, any area in your life if you do a little reverse engineering you would realize you created ALL your circumstances, good or bad! There were never coincidences, you created it. With this realization comes more questioning, how does it actually work? It is through your mind, your consciousness, your awareness I want you to realize that EVERYTHING you see in your reality is perceived by your mind, ALL IS MIND, studies show that if consciousness doesn't exist, reality that you know now does NOT exist

Source 👇🏻

When we say "the 3D is an illusion" it really is. You're the one assigning meaning/creating whatever the circumstances, the problem is that you were on auto-pilot, the human's non-understanding of reality made you that way, but that will be over now as you realize you hold the power.

Science calls it "the simulation theory" You're the one simulating it with your mind, your awareness, your consciousness, as consciousness is the only thing that we can call as real, spiritually speaking, you're a soul living through body, you are NOT your body.

There are people who went to experience the 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘥𝘦𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘷𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘬, where you get into a tank and restrict environmental sensory, people report that they don't feel their bodies at all and that they are only "aware" goes to show how consciousness is ONLY real (video from the movie: 𝘈 𝘎𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘤𝘩 𝘪𝘯 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘔𝘢𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘹, I highly recommend)

I CANNOT stress it enough when I say that you're 𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘭𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘦𝘴 as Neville says it, to think this reality is real and that you can't change it and can't be malleable, you do that EVERY single day but UNCONCIOULSY until you awaken to this truth

The truth that you've always been a conscious creator you were just deluded by society from birth that you can't be "supernatural" and alter reality...that this 3D world is real... but this is over! It's time for you to WAKE UP!

PART 2

𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙈𝙚𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙞𝙘𝙨

How do we consciously create, you ask..

Let's read what science talks about reality creation..

In Quantum Mechanics there's a theory called "the observer effect" which states: the phenomenon in which the act of observation alters the behavior of the particles being observed" Which means whatever we focus on, be aware of; is changeable, more on that in this video:

If we explain this in more layman words, we will come to an understanding that reality CAN be shifted, with OUR MINDS through focus! There's also the theory in Quantum Physics where there are multiple version of you out there in the Quantum Field and the minute you observe that you become it!

Here's where the fun begins!

PART 3

𝙍𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙩𝙮 𝘾𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙞𝙣 𝘼𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣

Neville Goddard says "creation is finished" What does he mean by that? It means ALL things exists in the NOW, there was never past or present, there is always NOW It all exists. "All possibilities, all the things you desire, your healing, your job, your house, the wisdom you desire, the spiritual attainment you seek, the answers you seek, the partner, whatever it is, because we all desire different things, it's all finished and available."

So when you desire something, you're not trying to get it! It already exists, "Nothing needs to be summoned (manifested), but EVERYTHING already exists!" - Neville, all possibilities exist in the quantum field, all possibilities exist in the 4D. All you have to do is just SELECT that reality, with your MIND, your imagination.

• What's the difference between the 4D and the 3D?

One is where your mind generates images and thoughts so they can be reflected, it is your Godly power of accessing past, present, and future, the real reality, the 3D is just a reflection. 4D is where you CREATE

• How does the 4D pertain to the parallel realities where everything exists?

You access the 4D to choose what you want to experience in the 3D! If you desire it, know that the possibility of it EXITS! Your imagination is the TRUE reality, as Neville says: “When man finally identifies himself with his imagination rather than his senses, he has at long last discovered the core of reality” Remember when I said your senses (operating on the 3D realm) make you think your reality is fixed? It is not, it is always changeable.

Sooo....

• How do we choose/select/shift to the desired reality?

It was never about techniques and I will explain how you can CORRECTLY do this.

So we already know that imagination is the true reality (the 4D) and the 3D (physical reality) is just a reflection, a mirror, a shadow! And we already know there’s infinite versions of you out there and one of them that ALREADY has your desire

But...

• How do we access it?

By shifting your focus, your conciousness, your thoughts! Neville calls it “states of consciousness”

When you change how you’re aware of your desire, how you “assume” it, that is what it’s gonna reflect! Remember the observer effect? What we are conscious of it will manifest

What do I mean by “Techniques don’t manifest, you do!” Most of you go through the mistake of putting importance on them thinking that “if I don’t do it right, I won’t get what i want” here’s why they don’t matter! We already know creation is finished so every possibility exists!

And we already know we create everything effortlessly with our minds! And we also know there’s infinite version of us in the quantum field right?

• Let’s take an SP example (since it’s the most popular topic on loatwt)

Let’s say I am in a version of reality where I don’t have my SP, knowing about parallel realities, I know there’s a version out there of me where I have them! So how do I shift to that version? I just simply ask myself a simple question (this where imagination comes in play the real reality) I ask myself “How would I feel if I was ALREADY in a relationship with them?) I would feel all the feelings of having them ALREADY, I shift to that state, I embody it! I shift my awareness to KNOWING I already have them! Its not about “attracting” things to you, it’s about SELECTING the state, the awareness of my desire! How would I think if I had it already? I jump to that timeline (that I know it EXISTS) and experience what I want so it will be reflected in the 3D, because I experienced in my imagination (4D) so I KNOW It’s REAL, IT HAPPENED! The minute you don’t GIVE AN EFF ABOUT THE 3D IT’S WHEN YOU KNOW YOU CAN CONSCIOUSLY CREATE!!!! Remember 3D is a MIRROR of what you selected in YOUR MIND! When you feel it is ALREADY done! 0 to 100 REAL QUICK!

“So like what about techniques, I don’t affirm anymore?”

Most of you use techniques to produce results. You are still operating on the 3D realm, thinking affirming or whatever will make your desires come true, when in fact you have TO ASSUME the STATE FIRST!

Think about it..if you ALREADY have it would you still be affirming non-stop? How did you manifest when you didn’t know about the law before?

After you assumed the state (conjuring the feelings of ALREADY having what you desire and playing with your imagination) that’s when techniques come in handy! You start affirming NATURALLY and EFFORTLESSLY! You don’t strain yourself by doing it! You are living in the END!

Always LIVE IN THE END! It is done.

Just how this post is. 💋

i reposted it here because I know it will help a lot of people!!!!

�� Credits goes to @x3n97 on twitter

The link to @x3n97 post on X (previously Twitter)

Have a good day/night 🥹🫶🏻

I have coaching for the void state and self-concept also tapes and it's guaranteed from my side but it depends on you

[genderqueerdykes]

That anon with the 11 year old transmasc kid really hit home because holy shit I had the same experience as a young trans boy. When I was 11-12, I was also incredibly suicidal, and a huge part of it was because of the hatred I received from queer peers based on my gender. My own "friends" told me that I'd grow up to become a predator or a rapist, that I was betraying the girls and women in my life by becoming the enemy, or that I couldn't ACTUALLY be a boy because nobody in their right mind would want to become one of THOSE horrible things. I was so unbelievably ashamed of myself that I genuinely thought I'd just be better off dead than risk growing up into a man. Of course, I couldn't talk about this with anyone, because why would someone ever complain about being a boy? We always have so much privilege! My worries were shut down, and all of my problems were dismissed with either, "If it's causing you this much distress, you must not REALLY be a boy" or "Boys have it easy, you need to stop complaining and uplift the TRULY oppressed people here". My support system was non-existent at the time and if it wasn't for an older cousin coming out as a trans man and taking me under his wing, I don't know if I would've made it out of middle school alive. I know that sounds dramatic, but it's just the truth. Him showing me that being a man didn't mean I was doomed to become a monster, that there were people who'd see me for who I was without disgust or hatred, saved my life.

I have no clue if the parent who sent that ask will see this, but just in case: as someone who was in the same position as your son, I cannot stress enough how unbelievably thankful I am that there are parents like you out there. Having that much support at home would've saved me so much pain and suffering as a child, and although it's awful that your son has to go through this in the first place (or that *anyone* has to, really), I'm so so glad he has you both in his corner. It's so unbelievably fucking hard being that young and facing bigotry from a community that's supposed to support you, especially when large swaths of said community refuse to acknowledge the issue even exists in the first place. Knowing that you've got his back and that you're trying your best to not let him fall down a path of self hatred for being transmasc makes my heart ache in a good way. He's very lucky to have your love and support.

i am so sorry you've dealt with this too, it's becoming all too apparent how common this behavior is, and that it is in fact transmasculine erasure that is to blame for why people don't understand how the abuse is, and not that it's not happening. i really appreciate you for reaching out and sharing this, if that parent is still reading, i hope they know that they're awesome for taking such good care of their son.

[youcouldmakealife]

2024 Writing Wrap

Well, my goal for 2024 was 225,000 words, and I did exceed that, so I believe that is what we call a success. Never mind that my ~secret goal was 250k and that the 225k goal was just in case anything came up. And it did. So that is technically still a success! So I’m trying not to be grumbly about it.

What I’m not grumbly about at all is how, exactly, that final word count broke down by project (actual numbers below).

I don’t think the COTT and SAIT word counts could be closer than if I’d been intentionally trying to balance them. Which, I cannot stress enough, I was not. I was actually expecting a 2:1 COTT v SAIT ratio, mostly because, well, SAIT hasn’t been easy to write at times, and I was fully prepared for that to continue. But then something happened. I won’t investigate it too closely — gift horses, etc — but the floodgates finally broke, and a character that was so reluctant to speak honestly about himself and his life that it left him (and me) mute was suddenly willing to talk.

(We all know what happened. Robbie Lombardi happened.)

So, coming into this year I set myself a 13 part (approx 27.5k) goal for SAIT, and a 60k goal for COTT. They both ended up around 75k. Add in the SOTWs&Ms, which ended up around 65k combined (goal was 60k), and on all counts, I beat my individual project goals, and absolutely smashed the one for SAIT.

Considering this year I also got the TOTI paperback done and published the final installment of Between the Teeth, I think it was a pretty productive year, particularly considering I was finally diagnosed with Audhd in January, and have spent a lot of time and energy processing that, reframing a lot of things, and adjusting my work style to better accommodate my neurotype.

It's all been a big learning process, though one slightly derailed by the arrival of COVID and the…refusal to leave of COVID…and a fraught one at times, but it’s really been a relief to look at things like ‘this doesn’t work for me because my brain isn’t wired that way’ versus ‘this doesn’t work for me because I’m lazy/not trying hard enough/not living up to my ‘potential’, ad nauseum. It’s been…good. Tough, and emotional, and sometimes exhausting, but good. And I think that might be the other reason that Georgie started to speak again: how the fuck was I supposed to write him starting to move forward when I was still masking? How could I?

Meanwhile my other project was literally ‘okay, what if I worked through some of this by making my ADHD and my autism kiss? What if I did that?’ And COTT has been an absolute delight for me as a somewhat chaotic way for me to examine how these totally different beings co-exist. Throw in me shoving a ton of common romance tropes, gleefully undermining them (sometimes even intentionally! Though COTT can indeed be marked down as yet another failure in my quest to write some proper hate sex), a whole lot of ‘look, he actually gets me’ that is probably a liiiittle too close to home (and, I think, the home of most ND people), and everybody Doing Their Best (even when it fails, even when it doesn’t look like it, even when they aren’t rewarded for that), it is probably the closest thing I’ve ever written to pure Id fic, and I’m including the fucking Scouts here.

So thank you for all being very patient with me working through my ~stuff via narrative, and I’m really glad some of you (Audhd, autistic, ADHD, and otherwise) see yourselves reflected in Holden and/or James as well. Every single thing that annoys about them is probably something I do. (Uh. Off the ice. I don’t throw dirty hits. And I sadly don’t have a hockey room either.) I love them both a lot and I genuinely think my loving them, with all their faults (that are often my faults), has made my relationship with myself better, because I too am Always Doing My Best, even when it doesn’t look like it. And sometimes I forget that.

Okay, enough of the navel gazing, time for numbers!

These may seem slightly different than the word counts on, say, AO3, but at the end of each writing day I log my process. It’s always a little inflated -- some of it ends up on the cutting room floor, some of it applies to works currently still in progress, etc.

But, end of the year, here’s the breakdown*:

*rounded up/down to the nearest thousand, but that was the extent of the rounding, they're just naturally handsome numbers

Cards on the Table: 75k

Still Always in Tandem: 75k

SOTW/Ms and Extras: 82k

(Comprised of: SOTWs: 34k, SOTMs: 33k, Extras 15k)

For a combined total of 232k, squeaking in a mere 7k above my 225k goal.

But wait! There’s the misc (includes some Gritty work, last minute BTT additions, the bracket challenge, and other things that don’t fit the categories above), which adds an additional 13k.

So, in fact, it all adds up to 245k. Which is pretty damn close to 250k in my humble opinion, especially considering I spent a full quarter of 2024 sick. So I think we can call this year a success, at least on the writing front.

[hbheavensent]

Lucifer/Lilith

I HATE that TWINK WITH THE TOPHAT, but Lilith is My Girl who I Cry About,,,

HUGE Content Warning for Grooming and general abusive relationships, like,,, I cannot stress this enough. And depression. That too.

Let's start with The Twinks design. Honestly I don't mind Cannon Lucifer all that much- I mostly just wanted more contrast with his outfit but it's not far off from what I would interpret. I like that he's short in comparison to Hell's VERY tall residents and the first humans (who are all between 8ft-11ft tall). I really wanted to lean into a more uncanny/weird look for him, so I got rid of his eyebrow privileges and his pupils. I also let him keep his cheeks and the hair since both are fitting for his look. Lucifer, in Heaven looked much the same but now is a shell of what he was. A Self Made man, a Coin Operated Boy if you will. Lucifer is obsessed with how he is perceived, both wanting to be intimidating and lovable. Wanting no one to dare approach him but to also seem wildly approachable. Lucifer's whole bit is wanting to have his cake and eat it too, not realizing he just cannot have that. His body is.. not organic in the traditional sense, he has skin and blood but his body is hollow except for the shell of it- which does have a thin layer of veins and all that good stuff.

For his Demonic Fuckoff Form, I did keep him the same height and stuff because honestly it IS just funny. His wings are mechanical, he made them himself, which is a bit of an illusion to Daedalus of Icarus fame and leaning into the heavy denial of his own holiness- which is also why his fake snake familiar curls around his horns like a halo! (Something I enjoyed in the cannon look, but it was inconsistently used.) I also made his outfit tear off, as I imagine his wings 'deploy' out. It also happened to end up looking a bit like those pictures of Jesus coming out of his Rock Hole which was accidental but I'm gonna say it was on purpose.

My Lucifer is much... more obviously evil. He's LUCIFER, ya know? He's the guy who kept pressing, interacting with humans despite everyone in his circle telling him not to- then grooming them, getting with Lilith before the apple. Before humans had free will. He fully knew what he was doing, he just didn't care to look at the consequences. If every other sin who fell from Heaven was compelled, driven by fate.. Lucifer was the only one of those seven who you could say was aware of himself, in control of himself. We can talk more about Adam/Eve and Cain/Able later, but since free will only existed post The Apple Incident, that means Lilith had no real life outside of Hell. There was no time for her to have committed sin, besides the marriage to a man when she had no idea what that could mean. Let's talk about Lilith. I designed her to look meek, downturned. I considered using owls in her design but I wanted to lean into the moon aspect of her character more subtly. I found that rabbits were often associated with the moon and they fit into being a common prey for snakes- so I worked with that for her shape language. I also sort of took inspiration from both nuns and wedding outfits for her dress. The crown/veil on her head cannot be removed, it's apart of her body and forever stuck to her.

The flowers I used are Butterfly Weeds, which in a bouquet are a sort of warning to leave the sender alone. That they do not want to be associated with you. They also have the double meaning of vitality, health, and resilience! Which is a sort of cruel irony. I also put horse-skull gloves on her hands to represent her connection to death in general.

As for her role, I decided that Charlie will actually be Eve/Roo's child but Lilith would treat her as her own. Naturally, I'm making it so that Lucifer made Charlie magically and boasts about how GOOD he was to his wives to do so, though it's mainly so he could control Charlie easier. Lilith saw this and took Charlie away from her father as often as she could, and with Lucifer being such a sore loser and not wanting to even TOUCH Sinners- Lilith thrived as the Queen of Hell, showing Charlie what it's like to love purely and care. However as years went on, Lilith became depressed. She was already inclined to this behavior/feeling and only fell into it more so when Adam started executing Sinners by the handful. Heaven was scared of Lilith's power, and so Sera sent Adam with a fleet of his own Angels to keep the numbers down in Hell. Adam sort of does whatever Sera asks, even if he's not a fan but we will GET THERE laterer. (His personality is more or less the same with some added depth.)

There came a time when Lilith was tired. Too tired to continue being a mother to a child of a man she hated, too tired to try living a life that was never in her own control. Being hated. Being idolized. Around when Charlie is 13 (because she is JUST 20 in my version of the series), she found Adam during an extermination. Being that Lilith is not a Hellborn and IS just a Sinner, she begged Adam to kill her. It was a tough sort of back and forth (THAT WE WILL GET INTO LATER) but eventually Adam does so, which will later be dramatized by Lucifer to Charlie as a battle when it really wasn't. I really wanted Lilith to haunt the narrative, it shocked me that this Queen of Hell had.. little to no weight or appearances in the show. I'm thinking large imposing statues, posters, photos by Charlie's bedside... Looming and looking, never with a smile on her face. The First Woman.

There's still a lot more I want to explore here with Lilith/Eve/Adam/Lucifer, but I really wanted to drive home that Lucifer is a HUGE fuckwad and that he's hurt people, particularly his wife.

And as per usual, the Height Chart- of which I've tweaked quite a bit

[sapphosscribe]

Great answer about how you manage to write consistently. Um, just one question - how do you write with ADHD? Maybe it's just me, but sometimes when I try to write it just comes out unnatural, I don't know where I'm going with my thoughts (even when I know exactly what I want to describe sometimes the words just won't come together) or I'm just describing without putting emotions in. And after like 20 minutes of doing so I MUST switch to a YouTube video, preferably a MV/performance video.

Also a huge issue for me - I feel like if I just sit down to do it then I'll forget that everything else around me exists and I just... Won't do the "necessary shit" (aka school/job, chores, etc.), but I still procrastinate on Necessary Shit™ and end up doomwatching YouTube. It's like I'm afraid to live my life to the fullest just to do this exact thing, but if at least feels safer??? Hate it!

This is SOOO relatable 😫.

Honestly trying to do ANYTHING with ADHD is not for the faint of heart.

Planning, planning, planning. I CANNOT stress enough how insanely helpful it is for me to have not only a plan for the story, but a plan for each individual chapter.

I try to aim for the sweet spot between planning so intricately there’s no room to let it breathe and just allowing the characters to do whatever to the degree I’ve completely lost the plot 😂😂.

I’d say the issues you’re having with describing without emotions or rambling is something I resolve in two different ways.

1) I look to my characters. Just like real life, no one in the scene is just standing around existing. They have their own thoughts, feelings, and motivations about what’s going on around them. I refer to this in my head as letting the story breathe. The characters often have a mind of their own. Sometimes I’ll realize that, based on something already established about their background, they’d be acting in a certain way or do something different then what I have planned and it helps make it feel more authentic. Keeping in mind what your characters want and what they’re actively trying to achieve in each scene can help with descriptors.

2) This might be a hot take but, honestly, let yourself ramble. Sometimes I’ll think I’m saying way too much much stuff in a chapter or the pacing is off, then I’ll go back and read it and it’s perfectly fine. I think of it like cooking food. It can take over an hour to bake something and it feels exhausting and like you’ve made a lot of mistakes along the way, but it’s just because you’re standing there measuring things out and adding ingredients. When you actually TASTE what you’ve cooked it all blends together into something much simpler.

No matter what you say, you can always clean it up in editing. The first draft is just you telling yourself the story and even if some of it turns out not to be usuable, you’ve probably learned something about your characters that will help you write them better later on.

This might also sound really weird but the way I structure my chapters and story follows the formula you might use to write an essay 😂😂

Before I do anything else with my story. I pick a theme, something that I’m trying to say/prove, the point of the whole thing, and I treat the rest of the story as evidence for that theme.

Each Act is a big piece of ‘evidence’ to support my theme and then each chapter in the arc follows emotional and plot beats to create that evidence.

Since Act 1 is already over I can use it as an example, though I’m not giving away the story’s overall theme. You can figure that out.😉

My big piece of evidence in Act 1 or my ‘big thought’ that connects to the main theme is “Bill’s current moral bankruptcy isn’t from a place of outright malice, but unprocessed trauma”. Then I planned out the structure to prove it: Bill crashing out spectacularly while trapped in human form by self harming, his relationship with Mabel forming transactionally, Bill trying to control Ford because Bill feels like he needs that to feel secure rather than having an equal partnership, The Axolotl and the first few flashbacks giving context to some of Bill’s actions, and closing out with the big moment between Ford and Bill at the party where he admits he cares about Ford for more than just what he could get from him.

Once I’m satisfied that I’m building the story toward what I’m trying to prove. I move on to the next section. So that’s my wild scientific method approach to big writing projects or even small ones!

As for the “forgetting to do necessary shit”. I set timers for how long I’m going to do what I’m doing and, once they go off, I give myself a few minutes to finish up whatever I’m working on and switch tasks. You can also use this in other areas of life. It’s been super helpful for me when balancing out work and leisure, but if it doesn’t work for you that’s fine too. Everyone’s different.

Procrastinating on “Necessary but unpleasant shit” I try to minimize by making it fun somehow. I plan my schedule a day in advance so I know what’s coming and if it’s a task I find difficult I try to add some element of fun to it. I turn on music or an audiobook when I clean and cook or wear an outfit that makes me feel good. I personally HATE exercising, so I bought a tiny treadmill and instead of sitting watching tv in the evenings, I put the tiny treadmill down and walk on it while watching something I like.

I also try to reframe thinking about the things I don’t want to do in a positive way. Folding the laundry means I get it out of my chair I like to sit in and read books. Vacuuming the floor is getting rid of bad energy and making the carpet soft again. Try to approach things as an adventure rather than a chore. Some stuff can be harder than others to grapple with, but, to quote the jogging Monkey in Bojack Horseman “Every day it gets a little easier, but you’ve got to do it every day. That’s the hard part. But it does get easier.”

Not to get all philosophical, but we only do have this one life. Even if it’s quiet and ordinary or hard sometimes, it’s better to try not to hate it or see just going through your day as something to dread. I’ve found that there’s actually a lot of tiny little things to love around every corner if you go looking for them.

If new things are making you uncomfortable, try what I like to call ‘safe spontaneity’. If I get unsatisfied with what I’m doing I’ll do something small that’s new and adds variety. Try out a new restaurant or a new type of food for one meal. Take 30min-1hr to learn about something that interests you outside of what you normally look at (I say having just finished two documentaries about Oceangate 😅😅). Find tiny ways to switch things up so you still have predictably and structure, but you add something new and grow your world a tiny bit more. Even if you end up hating whatever it is, at least you know you don’t like it and not to do it again! Allow yourself to grow and change at your own pace 🥰💗💗.

This was REALLY long and probably too much information, but I hope it helped!

@anon-22866634

[fakebatmanfan]

You’re feeding the last standing mad hatter fans and for that I cannot thank you enough 😭. what’s your favorite Mad hatter?, and what’s your romantic/ General head canons for them?. Take care!

Unsurprisingly (or maybe surprisingly because I get a lot of requests for BTAS Jervis and thus write for him a lot) my favourite Jervis is Secret Six. I just feel like he perfectly balances all of the attributes that make the character stand out as a batman villain.

He manages to be incredibly dangerous and intelligent while also being rather perverted and whimsical, in addition to being a sympathetic and emotional character.

It also helps that he shows up in Secret Six a lot, so there's tons for me to analyse. Please say you like my insane analysis posts? I've been coming up with more ideas as of late... But anyways, thank you for the request :)

Secret Six Jervis General HCs

TW: Mentions of sex

The most important thing to take into account about this Jervis and romance is that he's been there and he's done that (via mind control). What makes your relationship with Jervis special is that it's entirely willing on your part; you want him of your own free will.

He idolises you because of this.

You who are kind and perfect and sweet enough to want him! Oh, what did he do to deserve you? The most dear of all the creatures this side of the looking glass.

While such is true for all Jervi, when within a relationship, Jervis has a tendency to stress his more gentlemanly attributes. For instance, being well spoken, well read and so on...

He's more likely to be lucid around you. Partially because he wants to impress you, but also because you make reality that bit less painful.

You're like a little piece of Wonderland to him. Someone who makes life brighter, better. At first, he could scarcely believe someone like you could truly exist.

In fact, there are some points where he thinks he's hallucinating you and all the nice things you say and do.

How do you convince him otherwise? Touch him. Jervis adores even the tiniest of touches from you, not only assuring him that you're real, but assuring him that you love him.

Frankly, he's always trying to weasel affection out of you; leaning up for kisses, teasing you, etc.

For instance, if you ask him to pass you something at tea time, he might say:

"Ah, ah, ah. Are we forgetting something? Kiss first, sugar afterwards"

Jervis is a big fan of PDA, not only because he adores you but because it shows others you're spoken for. Albeit, he's still a gentleman and respects your dignity for the most part.

He likes to kiss your hands (not just the knuckles, like each of your fingers, your palm, etc), cheeks and forehead (when he can lmao).

When you walk together, he holds you very securely by the waist or sometimes takes you by the arm.

Jervis can be quite possessive of you, as well as clingy in general. He'll never not be talking to you or engaging with you in some way. And he talks a lot.

Would mainsplain things to you (he low key does this to his hat in the sequel comic).

In private, Jervis is extremely affectionate, which quite often leads to sex. He just loves being able to touch you... Usually having you sit in his lap (which you can do, even if his height makes it a little awkward) or peppering your skin with love bites.

A big part of Jervis' love language is making hats for you and being absolutely over the moon whenever you wear them. He also likes to make little hats for you food.

I think Jervis would have a very in-depth understanding of what your taste in hats is, as to increase the likelyhood of you wearing them. Like, you dress a certain way? He knows a style of hat that would go excellently with that.

As much as having you in his life helps with his depression, Jervis may still use substances and invite you to use them with him. Specifically, he may use his hat on you.

Like all Jervi, he doesn't like when you visit him at Arkham because (though he'd never admit it) he feels extremely ashamed. However, he writes you extremely freaky letters and asks you to send him photos of you (maybe naughty, maybe not because he knows the guards read look at them).

Horny or no, he's extremely poetic in said letters; going on and on and on about how much he loves and misses you and what he's going to do to you when he gets out...

[moonlight-tmd]

Prowlbee, ShockBee, Blitzbee

Kink head cannons.

Oooh dear- that was bound to get into my inbox at some point. Welp, here we go.

ATTENTION: this blog has a unique version of interfacing so read this post to know what's up!!

(CW: A whole lot of dirty)

ProwlBee

Prowl would defo be into breeding and all the animal-related kinks. Even tho Cybertronians have different biology from earth's animals he still finds ways for them to work stuff out. (octopus breeding, for example) They have a bunch of different poses to do the deed that they like.

Roleplaying as feral and broody are one of the ways they go at it.

Bee defo has some marking kink and loves to leave scratches and bites all over Prowl.

Prowl is mostly the bottom, although he doesn't mind having a go at Bee when the mini wants it.

They both love some sensory play- Bee's horns are sensitife to help him navigate the surroundings but also are very fun to play with during the act. Prowl is sensititve to sound and light so having Bee vent and whisper into his audial defo does things to him. Blindfold makes it even better.

I guess they're into bondage a little bit- I mean, most female animals are pinned down while the male breeds them therefore Prowl would be into being tied up/having limited movement and letting Bee wreck him while he helplessly struggles.

BlitzBee

Both of them are a bit of masochists- c'mon what did you expect.

They're reallly into marking, although Blitzwing has to be very careful because Bee is much more fragile than him.

They're switches, but Bee's topping score is a lot higher than Blitz's.

Blitzwing is into praise, he never really got any and loves when Bee whispers all those sweet things, dirty or not, into his audials while he ravages his insides. Bee is 50/50 on praise and degradation; he loves when Blitzwing tells him how much he loves him/his frame while also scolding him for trouble/being an aft.

Size difference. Bee loves to be strangled by Blitz's thick meaty tentacles and have that sweet sensory input all on him. Bee's tentacles are thin but quite long and very easy to get into all the little cracks and crevices at the sensitive spark chamber.

Blitz's glossa itself is a lot like a tentacle so Bee loves it when Blitz lick his tentacles and with it- Bee's still a little bit nervous when Blitz brings his intake close to something so small and fragile as his spark chamber but trusts him to not eat it. (which Blitzwing would NEVER do, not to his hummel)

Bondage for Blitzwing. I cannot stress enough how much he loves being tied up by Bee and having him do all the amazing things to him- he was scared at first but began to absolutely love it over time. Bee likes to have power over Blitz like that.

Edging, these two cannot go without having as least a little bit of teasing. They both love to make the other one beg them to finally do some real action.

Vore. Blitz is adamant to squeeze Bee into his intake and have him be all snug and comfy inside...and maybe have some more kinky action going as well. Bee wasn't as excited for this as Blitz but it eventually rubbed off on him and he gets a little horny whenever Blitz licks or puts his limb into his intake. To Bee's surprise, Blitz actually put effort into preparing himself to eat Bee; Blitzwing has eaten a lot of stuff over his years of existence, many which were not made for consumption, his fuel tank could handle almost anything. He made sure his throat could fit something larger and that all the system commands worked perfectly so he wouldn't accidentally digest Bee (which was very alluring and kinky but he couldn't allow it.) They have one of those giant spools or wire that Bee ties around his leg/arm so Blitzwing can pull him out easier. Whenever he's inside Blitz, he has to have this protective shield-coat (think like a glove around his whole frame) over himself so his own exposed parts don't get damaged by Blitz's internal fluids... also his paint, he does not have an excuse to explain why he's missing paint/has to get new one so often. Blitz loves having an "internal massage" done while he (and Bee) self-service. Bee loves the tight space and its walls squeezing him everytime Blitz moves.

ShockBee

Shockwave/Longarm loves to be in control. He loves to immobilize Bee and tell him what to do/say as well as delay/force his overloads.

Bondage is a huge thing for both of them, Shock/Long doesn't even need a rope to tie Bee up and have him all exposed. Same with Bee, he'll just maneuver his way around enough and have Long/Shock tangled up in his own limbs and at Bee's mercy.

Shock/Long loves to praise Bee- just tell him every single thing he loves about him and how good he's doing.

Bee loves how Longarm's body is all thick and plumpy. Loves to grope it when the mech least expects it during the fun. He's surprisingly flexible which allows them to try out a bunch of different poses.

Now for the bonus fun! AUs!

Cyberbeast AU (ProwlBee)

Prowl knows Cyberbeasts are like earth animals and that they too have their breeding season once a year. During that one week Prowl is basically kidnapped and ravaged over and over and over again- Bee, quite literally, is trying to breed him real good and Prowl loves it.

Prowl is into doing it while Bee's in his beast alt. He loves when Bee growls and bites at everything he can and rubs his scent on him. Even in half alts he does it.

Bee loves getting praise, he puts on intentionaly displays to further enchant his mate. Prowl is half into body worshipping Bee on this- he's just so amazed by the beauty of his one and only.

Prowl is always the bottom, he has no choice (not that he complains) but to get pinned down, barely able to ventilate and get wrecked.

Prowl actually persuaded Bee into wearing collars and leashes while they do it. They have a pet/owner roleplay whenever that happens.

Warframe!Bumblebee AU (BlitzBee)

Brasshorn/Bumblebee loves having Blitz immobilized and left to his mercy. He loves to be in control but in a way that'll let him drown Blitz in pleasure and bliss and not command him.

Brass/Bee loves to praise Blitz and worshipping his frame as if it was the most perfect one to ever exist.

Blitz really wants to top but Brass/Bee doesn't let him, only for special occasions (he has to be functional for work).

Blits is into BDSM and really wants to be ravaged by his mate but Brass/Bee is always careful with him- unless he begs long enough, then he'll wreck him in the best ways possible straight on his workbench.

Civil!Blitzwing AU (BlitzBee)

Blitzwing loves when Bee dirty talks and degrades him, Bee loves when Blitz praises him.

Blitz loves a bit of pain play- he's full of dirty little secrets he has yet to uncover.

Part-Insecticon!Bumblebee AU (BlitzBee)

Feeding kink. After hatching from the cocoon, Bee can produce honey. Blitzwing loves to eat it, more so when Bee sits on top of him and feeds it to him- even more so when it's mouth-to-mouth and they can enjoys all the sweetest kisses in the world.

Praise and worship, wings specifically. fligh frames have in-build thing for wings; Blitz adores Bee's sparkly wings and knowing their history he doesn't hold back about them when he's praising Bee. Bee is often too overstimulated to do the same but he'll let Blitz know by grabbing his wings and caressing/pulling at them.

Bee has a valve under his abdomen after hatching, and it gets really leaky when the two have fun. Blitzwing has Bee (carefully) pinned down with one servo while he passionatelly make out with him, ravages Bee's insides with his tentacles, and roughly fingers the valve giving Bee way too much stimulation on all ends. Bee loves it, even though he's numb for the entire day afterwards.

Bee loves to rub himself on Blitzwing and leave the sweet perfume on him, Bee got claws too so he'll leave tiny scratches on Blitz- most often his wings, to claim him into the hive.

Sparkeater!Bumblebee AU (ShockBee)

Since Bee and Long/Shock can't really interface because of the risk of contracting the disease, they have to come up with other ways to pleasure themselves. One way is to self-service one another.

Long/Shock has acquired an improved lab protection shield-coat (force field that sits on you like a glove) before he came to earth, this allowed them to actually interface without (most of) the stress about transmitting the disease via energy/fluids. (it shift with the body but never lets anything inside)

It's a rarity for Bee and Long/Shock to play the life and death game, but when they do- Long/Shock brings Bee a live spark to devour before they have fun, Bee uses his sparkeater form to get all kinky with bondage and marking (always with protection). Long/Shock loves the sense of danger when Bee licks his tentacles, slowly inching closer to his spark chamber. Bee would never do this to him and with a tank occupied he's barely any hungry.

Also some stand-alone Bee kinks cuz I like him-

Bee loves dress up, he'll put on fancy lingerie for his beloved and behave the part of a good "caretaker" while pleasing his mate.

Bee is a certified top, sometimes he bottoms but mostly he's in charge. Tiny top bias showing-

Choking/Squishing/Size difference. He loves a good hefty mate, and almost everyone is bigger than him so it makes sense- the bigger the better.

Praise- this guy loves to get his ego rubbed, especially during fun times. He loves the attention thoroughly.

Always aftercare, he'll do his best to actually take care of his beloved after the fun.

[slutforwoo]

skin to skin

| kim hongjoong- oneshot|

I ☆ pairing:office worker!reader x coworker!hongjoong!

I summary: everyone swears up and down you and hongjoong cannot stand each other, the constant bickering and arguments during meetings. but behind closed doors, that wasn’t the case. there was a love that existed between you. a love that was confided to the shadows.

I genre: angst, sprinkle of smut,sprinkle of fluff

I warnings: intended lower case, oral (f. receiving), arguing, reader pushes hongjoong once, shorter than my other one shots, it’s all angst to be honest, will be a part 2 to this. (i’m not that cruel just no happy ending for now) not proof read (I will later in the day please ignore any mistakes!)

⋆⁺₊⋆ ━━━━⊱༒︎ • ༒︎⊰━━━━ ⋆⁺₊⋆

"y/n, you still haven't finished the marketing reports. I need them to get the design team, so they can get started on the new column," hongjoong said, standing at the doorway of your office.

you roll your eyes before looking at him, "emailing them right now, they've been done, but xiomara had a family emergency and didn't get a chance to send them." annoyance laced in your tone. In all honesty you didnt wanna deal with hongjoongs shit. the day was long and beyond stressful. Sometimes you regret taking the chief marketing position.

hongjoong can see how tense you are. he walks into the office, closing the door behind him and locking it. "just send it over to San. he can take care of it while I take care of you," he whispers in your ear. his hand slides across your shoulders before moving your hair away from your neck, leaving sloppy kisses as he moves down to your collarbone.

"hm joong," you pant out, wanting to push him away, but god, you couldn't help but enjoy it. "you're so lucky everyone's gone," you whisper before turning around to pull his lips onto yours, the kiss hungry and desperate. hongjoong slides his hand onto the back of your neck, pulling you in deeper before moving it to the front of your neck to squeeze tightly. whines spilled out from your lips into his, which you needed. to let go and let someone else take control.

he pulls away, panting slightly, "what is it today, love?" he questioned, forcing you to look up at him, the way your eyes were glossy and your lips formed a pout. he knew the answer, but he wanted to hear it from you.

"take me, joong.." you whisper, and in that moment, his lips were back on yours. he began to leave a trail of kisses til he reached your blouse, unbuttoning as fast as he could to leave hickey's scattered on your chest. "you're all mine, darling" he mumbled against your skin. making his way down to the skirt you were wearing. pulling it up just enough for him to slip your panties off. wasting no time in eating you out. loving how you tasted on his tongue. it drove him insane, and the god damn whines that escaped your lips. his jeans growing tighter by the minute.

" 'm so close, joong, please don't stop," you beg, mind going into a blurry haze. pleasure washing over every inch of your body as he continued to work his tongue on you. he wasn't going to stop til you were an incoherent mess.

he double-tapped the side of your thigh, signaling that you were okay to finish. pleasure consumed every bit of your body. vision going in and out from the intensity. pulling away he admires the way your panting in your office chair, all because of him. your skin glistening under the dim office lights, god you truly were something else.

without uttering a word, hongjoong cleans you up. not wanting to push you too far given the stress you had. for that you were thankful, the one orgasm you had relaxing your mind. there was nothing else you could think of besides how good hongjoong’s tongue felt on you.

“thank you joong”you whisper as he pulls up your panties and adjust your skirt. picking you up in his arms to sit in your chair, placing you on his lap as he caressed your cheek. “anything for you my love” he said placing a kiss on your forehead.

the sting in your chest returned. why could he never publicly love you? it’s been 2 years of this, the sneaking around, pretending to hate each other in public, pretending as if the other doesn’t exist. it was growing old, tiring. all you wanted was for him to let you in, let you fully understand him and adore him.

but, that was simply not the case. you knew he was extremely guarded and closed off, it wasn’t a surprise. yet in these moments he turned that cold exterior off, allowing himself to be loving and caring to you in these moments. where you where skin to skin. your body on his. exchanging the deepest form of intimacy. you were growing tired of hiding. you wanted more, to be on his arm at company events, having romantic dinner dates in the most romantic places, to have him simply claim you as his fully.

“hongjoong?” you mumble, playing with the buttons on his shirt. not wanting to look up at him and have him notice your teary eyes.

“yes love?” re responded, hand still caressing the side of your face.

“why can’t we be together.. are you embarrassed of me?” the words leave your lips without a second thought.

he stills. removing his hand from your face and resting it on the side of your hip. he knew exactly why he couldn’t go public with you. he knew why he would never make this official. he simply didn’t want to be hurt. although he knew deep down the love he had for you was something he’d never experience before. he refused to let himself fall for it. to give his everything when in his eyes it would eventually fall apart.

“y/n. it’s not that. I don’t do relationships and we’ve talked about this hun” his voice barely above a whisper. the words causing a sting in his chest. because no matter how badly he wanted you fully. he knew he’d never take you.

your blood runs cold, the tears now spilling out as you stood up trying to recompose yourself. needing to be away from his touch. “god why can’t you let me fucking in joong” you sobbed, fixing your hair and grabbing your things. “i’ve given you every inch of me. of my mind, body and soul. you can’t sit there and tell me you don’t feel the same way towards me”

he gets up and grabs your arm, stopping you from walking away from him. his eyes meet your red teary ones. god he never wanted to be the cause of this. but he just couldn’t. he knew he couldn’t do it. “y/n i’m sorry. but you were made aware of this 2 years ago when we started this” he said, voice laced with sympathy.

you scoff pulling your arm out of his grasp, more tears spilling out of your eyes, sobs lodged in your throat. “you have all of me. these past two years. i’ve only been seeing you. I know how this began. but with the way you slowly opened up and became more affectionate and loving. I thought this actually stood a chance” you say looking at him dead in the eyes, forcing him to see the hurt in your eyes. as well as you searching his for any hint of that wall he put up cracking down. but there was nothing. eyes trained to be cold no matter what.

“this never had a chance y/n. this was just supposed to be what’s it’s been and you know that” he spoke through gritted teeth.

“fuck you hongjoong. you and I know both know this is more than what you’re making it out to be. you don’t take a random hook up to your mothers funeral. you don’t tell a random hook up some of the deepest things you keep. random hook ups don’t do the shit we do and you know that” you sobbed out shoving him away from you as he tried to get closer “what is the fucking point of lying about it. I love you. and you love me why can’t you just let me fully in”

his heart hurt seeing you like this. god how badly did he want to just hug you and tell you it would okay. but he couldn’t, he had to restrain himself from reaching out and pulling you into a hug. he can’t risk giving himself to someone when the chance of him losing himself again was there.

“I just can’t y/n. I don’t know what you fucking want me to say. i’m not going to beg you to fucking stay and continue this. you can walk out that door and i’m not going to chase you” he knew he had to be mean. he had to drive you away before it was too late. but it already was. you were undeniably in love with him.

it was as if he took a knife and stabbed you in the heart. you were stupid to think this would ever work. a love that was confided to the shadows coming to light. you should’ve fucking known.

“then don’t fucking chase me ever again” you spat before walking out of the office door.

he stood in your office stunned, that you really walked away from him. now that he was alone he let the tears and sobs he’s been holding in out. fuck he never wanted to let you go. quite frankly you were the best thing that’s happened to him in years. he adored your silliness, your ability to lift his mood by simply being with him, the way you knew all of his diet restrictions and would cook him dinner on the nights alone in his apartment.

he heart ached, it was broken all over again. but this time, the reason was because of his own actions.

love can only stretch so far til it wears thin. there is only so much a person can take before they hit their limit and break. he had pushed you to urs. taking away any ounce of happiness he had left. hitting harder when he walked into the office the next day to find you had resigned effectively immediately.

all because he wanted to keep it as skin to skin. not soul to soul like you needed from him.