#this woman was 42 and she was so sweet but it honestly was so sad

[thmles]

| You're Losing Me. (2)

- I can't find a pulse, my heart won't start anymore.

[pairing: miguel o'hara x spider-person!reader]

[warnings: sweet to angst, mentions of physical fight, blood, bruises, mention of deaths]

[a/n: this has been a long time coming!! i've tried to write these past few days but never really finished writing this but i was feeling a lil sad tonight so i managed to focus my motivation on writing this! i also went through some theories on reddit and twitter about miguel's canon theory bc i honestly question it?? anyway i hope i did the first 'you're losing me' fic justice with this, since i tried my best writing this. hope y'all enjoy 🫶🏻]

You were smart enough to leave the watch that was issued to every member of the Spider Society at your apartment. Miguel had been tracking your location only to see ‘you’ in your apartment. He blocked you from creating portals and tracking the location of him, Jess, and Ben. It was for your own good, anyway. He was looming over Brooklyn on a rooftop as rain lightly poured over the city. He looks down at his hand, the very same you returned your promise ring he had given you a year prior. Miguel figured that he’d talk to you after he brings in Miles, that he’ll try to make you understand his side. Miles was a kid, he doesn’t know better. He doesn’t understand how astronomical the consequence of letting his father live. With the help of his suit, Miguel is able to store the ring on the right side of his hip. The hunt for Miles had just begun.

-

You on the other hand managed to get to Gwen’s dimension. A somehow colorful yet gloomy version of Brooklyn. With a few taps on your (much better) watch, you located the apartment complex where Gwen lives. The watch even gave you the exact number of their apartment. Brooklyn was glowing in the dark of the night as you swung through the city. It reminded you of your Brooklyn. A beautiful city that never sleeps.

You approached the rooftop of the apartment and gracefully landed on it. After a quick change (which really just consisted of you taking off your mask and slipping on a jacket you managed to grab before you left your apartment), you slowly descended the stairs from the rooftop to their apartment.

A knock on the door pulled Gwen’s and his father’s attention. It was a long time coming, talking about their feelings, the truth, and being Spider-Woman. “Captain Stacy? I’m uh, a friend of Gwen,” The voice called out. Gwen smiled knowingly at her dad as he stared back at her in confusion. “She said she’s coming back home today and she left something in my house.” The voice continued.

Gwen let out a laugh and quickly opened the door before her dad could do it.

“You came.” Gwen beamed at you. You returned a smile and pulled her in a hug.

“You really think I’d leave you by yourself?” You mumbled in her ear.

She hugged you tighter before pulling away. Her dad looked surprised as Gwen seemed to forget she was in her Spider-Woman attire. Gwen looked between you and her father before exclaiming, “Oh, dad! This is my friend! They have been uhm, a really good friend of mine!” Her dad motioned at her attire. Gwen laughed as you waved at her dad. “Don’t worry, dad. They know.”

-

After a quick goodbye, you gave Gwen the watch you had made similar to the ones issued by the Spider Society. After a few dimension hopping, you managed to assemble a team of Spider-People who hoped to help Miles as Gwen looked for the latter. Gwen detected that Miguel, Jess, and Ben were at Earth-1610 to search for Miles but Miles wasn’t in the dimension. After a quick talk with the team (consisting of Margo, Spider-Noir, Peni, Pav, Peter B. and Mayday, Peter Porker, and Hobie) you were quick to realize that Miles was sent to Earth-42. The group agreed that they should rendezvous with Gwen, but were reluctant at your decision to go to Earth-1610 as a distraction for Miguel.

“What do you think Miguel’s going to say after seeing you’re going against him?” Peter B. asks as you both stand before a portal to Earth-1610. The night sky was cold and you were jealous of Peter’s robe. Your eyes softened as you looked at Mayday looking up at you curiously. You booped her nose and it made her giggle.

“Well, I’m about to find out.”

-

It wasn’t hard to find Miguel. Looming across Miles’ house, scanning if Miles made it home. Silently landing behind him, your heart ached as you stared at his back. It doesn’t even feel like it’s your Miguel anymore. It’s almost as if he’s out of your reach, that no matter what you’ll say will go right through him.

Shakily you called out, “You know he’s not here.” You approached him slowly until there was a reasonable distance between the two of you. The rain pattered on your body as you crossed your arms in front of your chest. You were shaking from nervousness, sadness, and the cold rain.

“I know. I was waiting for you.” Miguel turned to face you. His mask came off, his eyes bore into yours and you swear you could feel your heart drop to your stomach. You took your mask off and threw it in front of him. He looked at your discarded mask before looking at you in confusion.

“I’m sorry it had to end this way, Miguel.” Your voice softly said, getting in a fighting stance. You knew you had to help Miles. You would do anything to help if it were anyone in that situation. You owe it to your own father to help save everyone, to help save someone’s father. Growing up without one was one of the hardest things you ever went through. You didn’t want that for anyone else.

“So, you’re ending everything we went through for a kid?” He scoffed as he approached you, You were quick to back up to maintain the distance you guys had.

“Miguel, that is the point! He is just a kid!” You exclaimed. Miguel rolled his eyes and replied, “A kid who knows nothing about the damage he is causing!”

“It was your fault! You didn’t have to create the Spider-Society or replace someone’s identity! Isn’t that the very reason that universe collapsed!?” You yelled, leaning towards him as he looked at you in shock. “That you willingly replaced someone, and continued to do so? That your actions were the very reason that everyone died in that universe?” Miguel could only look at you as his eyes turned scarlet. You knew he was seething with anger.

“And that you, Jess, and Ben, of all people,” You scoffed as you glared at him. “Have the nerve to tell Miles that he doesn’t belong. When the three of you were never bit, right?” You finished. “Oh and your ‘canon theory’ is bullshit. What if that Spider-Person isn’t close to a police captain or doesn’t have an uncle who needs to die? What then?” Honestly, you were shocked at how much you had told him. Truth be told, the things you said were things you kept to yourself for months.

Miguel didn’t know what to say, but he knew you were right. His supposed theory was only based off of most Spider-People, but it doesn’t guarantee that those events happen to every single one. To him, it felt like an attack on him and his ego. That you questioned his every move despite those actions were done to protect you. Because he can’t risk losing you.

-

The next thing you knew, Miguel launched at you. Thankfully, you had your ‘spidey-senses’ and were quick to dodge him. Before you knew Miguel would rather die than hurt you himself. But when he saw your bruised and bloodied body on the rooftop, he finally realized that he let the anger get the best of him.

“You lost me, Miguel.” Those were your final words before you slipped into unconsciousness. He brought you back to the Spider-Society to get you proper medical attention before he had to leave to hunt Miles. Miguel took your left hand and slipped on the promise ring on your ring finger. He gave the back of your hand a kiss.

“I hope you forgive me, mi amor. I’m sorry.”

[lovestuckyhatemarvel]

Okay, another hour and a half long episode.

1.) Brenner missed the sad CGI and also baby El was very good at sealing the upside down.

2.) Brenner should have been a tattoo artist instead. I mean, a tattoo artist for adults, not kids. He’s got very steady hands and can tattoo numbers very exactly.

3.) THIS IS MUSIC.

4.) Honestly so far the only one who’s been a snob about music is Robin. But also I still don’t think Eddie would like Taylor Swift.

5.) Henry really wants to villain monologue at you, Nancy. Take a seat for this cliche.

6.) Damn, the CGI on those restraints is…bad.

7.) These images are going way too fast.

8.) Damn, Steve. Your arms are nice.

9.).”Written and directed by the Duffer Brothers”. I Know. That’s the Problem.

10.) What’s the point of keeping Yuri quiet at this point?

11.) Hopper, we super had a funeral for you.

12.) El is actually doing really badly.

13.) Why is anyone surprised that demogorgons can climb? Look at those fuck off legs.

14.) DID NONE OF THESE GUARDS PAY ATTENTION TO HOPPER USING FIRE?

15.) Okay the soldiers can unload their clip into a demogorgon and nothing happens but Hopper can shoot a demodog once in the head like Ol Yeller and it works.

16.) Okay but for real, where are the Russians getting all these bastards? Fun tubes, but WHERE ARE THEY FROM? Are they from Hawkins? How did they transfer that shit?

17.) HOW’D THEY GET THE CGI DUST MONSTER TO RUSSIA?

18.) Okay she can lift a thing.

19.) Will, I’m so sorry, but I did not care about your speech to Mike.

20.) I still don’t understand how Henry survived El’s attack or why the upside down didn’t turn into anything for him or what the fuck he did for like a decade floating in a void.

21.) Why is everyone whispering

22.) El got to hear at least some of the plan, at least.

23.) The War Zone is a hilarious name for a shop.

24.) Eddie, you moron. Wearing a mask doesn’t help if you’re wearing a shirt emblazoned with your club.

25.) BIG BOY.

26.) My roommate pointed out the RV would have been hooked up to water and sewage so driving it off like that would have fucked up the ground and the vehicle.

27.) I do not understand why Henry is so powerful or why him killing people would give him their powers when it doesn’t do that for El.

28.) I still don’t want Steve and Nancy together. Also I don’t think he actually said he wanted her there.

29.) that helicopter is hilarious

30.) “The KGB will be listening to this call” Oh what a change. This time it’ll be agents of someone else’s government that will be listening in.

31.) Oh, okay, Steve got the jacket from War Zone. Where’s the vest though?

32.) Ah, the boyfriend reveal.

33.) I still hate Jason Carver. Also, buckshot has a pretty good range, dipshit.

34.) Tire tracks. Ah yes, the plot happened here.

35.) IDK why El told Sam to check Max’s place. The bit she heard did not make it seem like they were staying there. And so Sam asking that woman for that was kind of stupid.

36.) What? Brenner double crossed Sam Owens? Who could have predicted this twist? Surely only the greatest psychics.

37.) I am proud of El for saying to Brenner’s face that he’s a monster.

38.) Baby girl, kill Brenner anyway.

39.) YOU KNOW WHO WOULD LOVE TO KILL BRENNER? KALI. THE GIRL NO ONE IN THIS FACILITY TALKS ABOUT.

40.) Robin and Steve are sweet.

41.) goddamn it, brenner, just remove El’s collar.

42.) I am glad Brenner got shot so many times though.

43.) Oh shit, it’s the script.

44.) oh no the psychic child is using her psychic powers to stop your from badly shooting at her? Who could have predicted this?

45.) oh my god el, do something real already.

46.) the payoff wasn’t worth it.

47.) “Yeah, it’s cool, but it would have been better if it’d happened about 11 seconds earlier.” My roommate is hilarious.

48.) Brenner turned off the collar as a last act. Okay whatever.

49.) BRENNER SHUT THE FUCK UP AND DIE ALREADY.

50.) this heartfelt conversation makes no sense and was not earned.

51.) brenner you were shot like 5 times by a sniper rifle, how are you still talking, let alone alive?

52.) SHould have run over his corpse with the pizza van

53.) god they held on that brenner shot for way too long

54.) WHO’S GONN DIE????? Just say everyone.

55.) moody shots.

56.) LMAO THIS SONG. GOD. DUFFERS, STOP SUCKING YOUR OWN CODCKS FOR FIVE SECONDS.

Oh god I looked ahead and the season 4 finale is 2 and 22 minutes long. I hate the duffers.

[yvmoveon]

.

[hops-hunny]

Not Enough Parties

Pairing: Blaise Zabini x Reader

Pronouns: He/Him

Word Count: 1.7k

Request: “hello! Can I request a blaise x male reader for your 300 celebration? Fluff please! With the prompts “Hey sir!” “I’m so smitten with you and everyone knows it.” “

Summary: Drunk words are truly sober thoughts.

Warnings: Underage drinking?? Mentions of sex (not the reader or blaise), shit parents.

A/N: I’m so sorry that it’s so short. Ik it’s only 1.7k words but I promise it’s good! I had a lot of fun writing this so I hope you enjoy reading it.

21."I'm so smitten with you and everyone knows it."

42. “Heyy sir!”

(Y/n) was a naturally outgoing person. No matter the size of the party, big or small, you could find him on the dance floor, dancing his little heart out. Sure he wasn’t any good at it, but his energy was such a positive thing that everyone around him would encourage him. He also was popular. Not because of anything wrong nor did he have to social climb to get to the top. People loved him because of his bright and sunny deposition and his kind heart. Combine that with a handsome face and you’ve got yourself a bit of a star amongst the students of Hogwarts. 

However he was a charmer. He’d use his sweet talk and smooth tongue to get himself into situations but also to climb right out of them too. He never really flirted with anyone unless the promise of getting something was there as well too. Or at least that’s what he thought until he met him. Blaise Zabini. At first, Blaise made him feel weak in the knees. Who didn’t feel weak in the knees around him? He was gorgeous, sculpted from perfection in every way, shape, and form. Piercing eyes that would stare right into your soul and could spot your bullshit from a mile away. Not to mention how mysterious he was. He had an aloof and stoic presence around him that drew (Y/n) in. He wanted to know more.

However, he wasn’t good at that. Although (Y/n) had a ton of friends - great ones might he add- he could never find himself able to get close to them. Sure people knew him and even things about him but people didn’t really know him for who he was. Although he was a very bright and kind person, he had a bit of sadness within himself. When you spend so much time around others, constantly speaking with them and learning about them, you start to lose who you are along the way. Who even was he anymore? Sometimes after a long night of partying he’d look into the mirror and not have an inkling of who he was looking at.  Not to mention how his parents felt about him.

(Y/n) loved his parents dearly but they had a tendency to ignore who he was and try to raise him to be something else. Both his parents were very successful people both in the muggle world and the wizarding world as well. They were two of the highest paid doctors in the muggle world and that skill most certainly transferred over, leaving them among the elite. He hated having to shmooze and talk to all the rich snooty slytherin children whose heads were so far up their parents asses that it wasn’t funny. He spent most of the parties having his parents make up lies or brag about accomplishments that he had achieved so long ago. Why did they feel the need to lie? Couldn’t he as who he was now be enough. Sure his grades weren’t the highest, he had no musical skills, and his fencing was subpar but that didn’t mean they couldn’t be proud of the boy he had grown to be. But everytime he found himself sinking deeper into his thoughts at these ritzy stuffy balls, Blaise was always right there to save him. That’s why he liked Blaise. He admired how he could easily fit in with the prats but then sneak off and have a fun time celebrating at parties in the Gryffindor common room. Once again, he was at one of these dreaded events.

“Ah, Mr and Mrs.(L/n)! What a pleasure it is to see you.” The man said, bowing as he placed a hand over his chest. He side eyed (Y/n) secretly, shooting him a wink. (Y/n) bit back a smile, continuing to watch the boy interact with his ‘parents’. Blaise grabbed the woman’s gloved hand, placing a kiss on it. He rolled his eyes at her unnecessary amount of laughter.

“Blaise! How nice to see you again. To what do we owe the pleasure?” He bit back a complaint at his mother’s shrill voice. He pretended to gag some, stopping when she stepped on him in an attempt to silence him. He straightened up before clearing his throat, looking up to see the taller boy was already staring at him.

“I was wondering if I could take (Y/n) off your hands here. I know he can be quite the handful.” he chuckled out, smiling at the boy as he gave him a scowl. His parents chortled in laughter, his mother playfully hitting the boys shoulder.

“Oh, you don’t know the half of it..” she trailed off, taking a big swig of champagne as she looked away from her son. ‘Bitch’ he thought but was interrupted as his father cleared his throat loudly shooting him a knowing glance. Right, he forgot he was a skilled legilimens.

“I think it’d be best if you did take him for a bit. We’re probably boring him to death, right son?” His father asked lightheartedly. However, (Y/n) just shot him a glare before flashing him a fake smile.

“You bet you are dad!” he said in an overly happy tone. Before the situation could escalate, Blaise grabbed his arm dragging him off but not before offering them a quick “thank you”. He looked up at the taller boy, a glare still present on his face from his time around his parents.

“You are the worst.” he laughed out as they got to the garden. (Y/n) sighed, walking around some as he took in some much needed fresh air. He took in a deep breath before opening his eyes. Turning around, he grabbed the bottle of fire whiskey from Blaise, taking a few huge gulps, wincing at the burn.

“Yeah, yeah. Where’d you get this?” he started off, handing the bottle back to the boy who gladly accepted it. “Also where’s Dray? I thought for sure you’d be with him.”

“Probably off banging it out with Parkinson. Goyle gave it to me. He brought it when he came to tell me a few of the other kids here are throwing a little party of their own over there.” He said, motioning a large umber hand towards the forest. The (h/c) haired boy’s eyes lit up at the mentions of a party. He took his blazer off, throwing it on the ground along with his tie as he began to walk off.

“Well, what are we waiting for? Let’s go! They had the right idea slipping out of this overpriced torture event.” Blaise simply chuckled at the boy as he shook his head before he took off his own blazer and tie, chasing after him so he could lead him the right way. Although (Y/n) didn’t really need his help, he had a sixth sense for sniffing out parties.

--------------------------------------------------------

An hour and way too many solo cups full of alcohol later, Blaise and (Y/n) were completely and utterly wasted. However, that didn’t stop him. (Y/n) was having the time of his life, dancing the night away. Although he usually hated hanging out with these prats any other time, he had to admit they knew how to throw a good party for a bunch of stuck up rich fucks. It was nothing compared to the Gryffindor parties back at Hogwarts but with a few more shots it very well could be. He let his eyes flicker across the outskirts of the party before they landed on a familiar pair of brown ones. Blaise had opted on sitting out since he claimed to be not much of a dancer, but that wasn’t going to stop (Y/n). He had a large drunk smile as he walked over to his equally as drunk friend.

“Heyy sir! Come dance with me!” he said, dancing to emphasize what he was saying. Blaise chuckled before nodding his head lazily. (Y/n) pouted, stumbling forward into the man’s arms. “Whaaa? Why not! Aww come on. Pleasee?” he whined out, laying his head on the male’s shoulder. Blaise was quiet for a minute before dragging him over to the dance floor. (Y/n) cheered loudly, jumping to the beat of the song as Blaise joined him. Although he wasn’t a great dancer, his friend who ‘wasn’t much of a dancer’ sure in the fuck was. He let his mouth hang open, watching as his friend moved and swerved his body expertly to the beat before shooting him a wink. (Y/n) was in shock. “You bloody liar!”

Blaise began to laugh at that, running as his shorter friend chased him. The two began to laugh together as they fell on the forest floor. It was as if everything and nothing was funny at the same time. One would say something stupid and the other would laugh along to it. “W-wanna hear something funny?” he wheezed out, staring into the boy’s (e/c) eyes. “I'm so smitten with you and everyone knows it.” he let out a loud laugh as the other boy joined him. The both began to cackle wildly. Tears of laughter spilled out of both their eyes as they continued to cackle.

“W-wanna hear something funnier? I’ve had a crush on you since 3rd year and you didn’t even notice!” he said, snorting as his laughing fit carried on. The laughter died down after a long while as they began to sober up, processing what they had both said. “How didn’t you notice? I made it obvious.” he grumbled, looking up at the boy. Blaise’s eyes widened, searching for any sign of lying in the boy’s words.

“I...don’t know honestly. I mean, you’re always flirting with people so I assumed you were just joking as usual. You didn’t think to just, I don’t know, tell me like a normal person?” he teased, smiling as the boy punched his shoulder.

“Blaise Zabini, do you understand how scary you are?! What do you mean why didn’t I tell you? Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked, scooting closer to him. Their knees touched as they set across from one another. Blaise shrugged before scooting his face closer to his.

“Doesn’t matter now. Since you’re mine, I can do this.” Before the boy could speak, he leaned forward kissing him. The kiss was soft and gentle compared to the bass of the music that blared in the distance. The (y/h/h) boy kissed back, climbing into the boy’s lap which prompted him to wrap his arms around him securely.

The old saying was true, drunk confessions are just sober thoughts.

[dangermousie]

2020 End of Year Post - kdrama edition

You can find my 2020 cdrama post here: dangermousie.tumblr.com/post/638449659546845184/2020-end-of-year-post-cdrama-edition

This is only going to cover kdramas that aired in 2020; if it originally aired another year, it’s not on this list.

It’s been a pretty lackluster kdrama year. There are probably only 5 kdramas I truly loved and only three of them I was really obsessed over. Better luck in 2021!

DRAMAS WATCHED

(In order of liking from least to most as opposed to pure quality; I am including if I’ve seen enough to make up my mind; yes I realize that’s inaccurate, but that’s my list)

42 Born Again - so bad, so incoherent, so insane, I have no idea why the leads signed up for it (and unlike some of the other watchers, I think it was awful from the very start.) There is literally nothing about this drama that makes sense.

41 Love with Flaws - a bunch of people who should be tried under the Geneva Convention.

40 Sweet Munchies - Jung Il Woo proves his inability to pick a functional script.

39 Meow the Secret Boy - if you ever wanted to bang a cat, this drama is for you. Not being a furry, however...

38 Do Do Sol Sol La Sol - I lost braincells just typing out this title.

37 When I Was the Most Beautiful - the only way it’s not the dumbest, most pointless melo of 2020 is because Born Again considerately came out the same year.

36 Woman of 9.9 Billion - if you want to watch an artsy French movie about miserable people, but only badly made, boy do I have a drama for you.

35 Lies after Lies - screams after screams.

34 Backstreet Rookie - people were up in arms about various problematic plots. I am a survivor of many plots much more problematic but even I couldn’t survive how utterly boring and annoying this drama was and how utterly irritating the leads were. This has taken Ji Chang Wook off my top favorites into “should I even check his latest Lovestruck in the City? Probably not” territory almost single-handedly (Melt Me helped, to be fair.)

33 Men Are Men - boring is boring.

32 Dinner Mate - two beautiful boring people eat out a lot.

31 Was It Love - no it wasn’t.

30 Alice - Joo Won in the shower can make up for a multitude of sins but not plot nonsense of such magnitude. When you find yourself thinking it would be better if he hooked up with the alternate universe version of his mother because at least then something entertaining would happen, you know it’s bad.

29 More than Friends - started out OK, then made me hate basically everyone and kept going.

28 Start-Up - honestly, it’s probably more decent than its place here, but the toxic and batshit fandom for it (the worst this year) made me feel like breaking out in hives any time it’s even mentioned.

27 The Spies who Loved Me - how to take a good cast and waste it.

26 Private Lives - it was good but it never took off with its concept and spent more time on the incoherent plot than the OTP which was its one strength. It’s a decent drama but coming after Heartless City and My Beautiful Bride from the same writer, it’s a disappointment.

25 Record of Youth - as high as it is due to Park Bo Gum hard carrying this entire awful drama on his shoulders and doing it so well I finished it. Alas, while he is in one drama (and that drama is great), the rest of the characters and the entirety of the script are a pointless useless mess.

24 Do You Like Brahms - excellent first third, mediocre middle, and terrible last third. I don’t know what musical term applies to this? Diminuendo, I think.

23 I’ll Go to You When the Weather is Nice - nice and mellow but nothing much happens.

22 Forest - mainly for Park Hae Jin’s excellent and frequently naked bod.

21 The Ballot - I didn’t love it as much as everyone did but it was well-made.

20 Hyena - more romance and less weird law stuff would make it better.

19 365 Repeat the Year - surprisingly solid.

18 The Game Towards Zero - see 365.

17 When My Love Blooms - very old fashioned, very lovely.

16 Chocolate - also very old fashioned and very lovely but also with Yoon Kye Sang performing medical procedures bleeding and shirtless. MMM.

15 (tie) Secret Royal Inspector - a fun if run of the mill sageuk.

15 Find Me In Your Memory - best melo this year.

14 Mystic Pop Up Bar - surprisingly good even though I wasn’t planning to check it out.

13 Where Your Eyes Linger - came out of nowhere but was tender and hopeful and lovely.

12 Itaewon Class - Park Seo Joon hard carries a drama that is already excellent. Love it.

11 Psychopath Diary - Yoon Shi Yoon is such a treat in a hilarious, cynical, dark comedy.

10 Kairos - more like ouroboros.

9 Queen Love and War - in a year where sageuks are very rare, this was solid and surprisingly moving and shippy.

8 The King Eternal Monarch - people didn’t like it but I did. It’s no masterpiece and both the leads and the writers have better dramas, but it was a lovely romantic fairy tale for me.

7 Mr. Queen - sharp, hilarious, and some of my favorite actors.

6 Psycho But It’s OK - healing, sharp cinematography and even sharper chemistry.

5 Crash Landing on You - the last ep pissed me off so much this drama is dead to me but I loved it so much until then I can’t place it lower in good conscience.

4 Train - who knew I would go this hard for an OCN drama or that OCN would do romance so well? But this time-travel mystery romance is just incredible and I shipped the OTP and rooted for the characters and loved every last bit of it.

3 Run On - this is the drama Record of Youth wanted to be but failed. Smart and lived in, you feel like you are peeking at real people, but also even four episodes in, I am so invested in the main characters separately and together, and care for them so much, it’s a little frightening.

1 (tie) Tale of the Nine Tailed - my perfect fantasy romance. I liked it better than Goblin, yeah I said it.

1 Flower of Evil - all the tropes I love in one incredible package. I would rewatch episodes waiting for new ones trying to puzzle the story and to stay withdrawal but it works just as well on rewatch. Lee Jun Ki brings his trademark tortured intensity and for once, both his leading lady and his script back him up and are worthy of that. It’s perfect.

FAVORITE DRAMA

It’s a tie between Tale of the Nine Tailed and Flower of Evil but if I had to pick just one, FoE, because it had me seriously obsessed and guessing about the protagonist and gave me the narrative tropes I love so much and an OTP that statisfied all my hurt/comfort kinks and then some.

WORST DRAMA

Born Again - honestly, this is so bonkers it almost becomes good but alas...

FAVORITE MALE CHARACTER

Do Hyun Soo/Baek Hee Sung, Flower of Evil - he is so messed up, so on edge, so traumatized. Yet capable of so much warmth and caring even as he himself doesn’t realize his humanity. FoE is basically a story of a man pushed and punished by the world for his entire life who, because of one woman, finds a safe place and peace and slowly comes to life without realizing it, and watching his desperation to keep this small bit of normalcy is so heartbreaking and exciting all at once. Plus, you start the drama thinking he’s a psychopathic serial killer and end it (if you are me) thinking he must be protected at all costs and if anyone even looks at him wrong they must suffer, and that’s quite a change!

FAVORITE FEMALE CHARACTER

Nam Ji Ah, Tale of the Nine Tailed - she is so funny and tough and smart and loving and amazing that I will totally buy that a literal demi-god will do anything and everything for her and love her for literal eternity.

NEEDS TO BE MURDERED

Dad in Record of Youth - yes in a year with serial killers and supernatural demons, I picked a normal character from a mediocre drama. It’s his everyday awfulness to his family that hits so hard and I am sad he never got his comeuppance.

FAVORITE SHIP

Ji Ah x Yeon - a fearless reporter and an immortal demi-god who’s been hoping for his human beloved to reincarnate. A really rare set-up where the OTP is equally ride or die, so compatible and completely BAMF. I got why he waited for her for that long and then fell in love with her all over again. Perfection.

Runner up: Flower of Evil - he is so messed up he literally does not believe he is capable of love or empathy, but he falls in love with her anyway and so utterly she permeates his entire life. She is tough as nails and only believes what she sees and is the sole person who believes in him against the world. She loves him but he needs her. She needs him but he loves her. They are amazing.

FAVORITE SECONDARY OTP

Seo Dan x Gu Seung Jun, Crash Landing on You, North Korean x Conman were so good I shipped them harder than the main OTP and the end of that storyline pissed me off so much I dumped the drama and didn’t finish it for months (and it’s still dead to me.)

NOTP

Record of Youth - it started out and they didn’t have much chemistry but the dialogues were interesting and I thought the chemistry would grow. It didn’t and deteriorated, their dialogues became boring and relationship had zero development (about as much as the supposed female lead.) I think we were supposed to feel bad they broke up and they were going for a bittersweet open ending, instead I found myself happy about the break up of two incompatible, chemistry-less people and hoping for the love of God they never get back together.

FAVORITE SCENE

Yeon and the bridge of knives, Tale of the Nine Tailed - Yeon choosing to undergo the creeptastic bridge of knives for a chance to save Ji Ah, who at that point he is not aware is the reincarnation of his Joseon love because, as he says, he doesn’t care if she is or isn’t, it just would be more horrible to have her die than to undergo the horrific torture he is undergoing, and then the sequence with his catching her, her weeping over him and the fact that she is the original Joseon girl revealed and all the bandaging and his watching her sleep and all that loveliness, is everything for yours truly.

Runner up: Hyun Soo having that break-down at the cliff at the end of ep 15 of Flower of Evil as Ji Won desperately tries to convince him she is alive and he finally stumbles to her.

Runner runner up (it’s my list, I will do what I want): Do Won preparing to blow his brains out to give a chance to Seo Kyung to live in Train.

BIGGEST CRUSH

Seon-Gyeom, Run On. Yeah, I know. Im Siwan is tiny, delicate featured and has a runner’s build, none of which are things that normally appeal to me. But his character is so odd, so honest, so unflinching in pursuing what he thinks is right, so incapable of self-pity despite plenty of reasons for it, and so ridiculously attractive when he smiles, I don’t even care.

BEST SCENE STEALER CHARACTER

Kim Bum, TotNT - I started out being annoyed by him and ended up looking forward to his scenes and being distraught by his ending.

NEEDS A SEQUEL

Honestly, none. I was fine with all the endings. I wouldn’t mind seeing post-end life of Tale of the Nine Tailed characters or the OTP settling into their literal new world in Train, but I am good.

TROPE THAT NEEDS TO DIE

Time jump that solves all the problems off screen or alternatively years pass and everyone is frozen - something that kdramas need to learn and need to learn badly. See Record of Youth, Brahms and Start Up.

FAVORITE TROPE WE’VE SEEN A LOT OF

Men who are ride or die for their OTP - this was a great year for this - the male leads of four of my five dramas were beyond anything on that scale (only exception is Run On because it’s still too early to tell there.) Yes PLEASE.

BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENT

This was a banner year for that what with Start Up, Do You Like Brahms, Record of Youth, and Private Lives all starting out well and nosediving off the cliff but winner is Crash Landing on You. I loved it so much for bulk of its run but the last episode pissed me off so much I deleted all my files and called it a day.

BIGGEST GOOD SURPRISE

Flower of Evil - I had no expectations of this drama and wasn’t even planning on watching it despite liking both the lead actors because yet another “look at evil serial killer be evil” drama with no romance was not my thing. Luckily someone convinced me there might be some romance and I peeked curiously. Honestly, their promo campaign was the most misleading and dumbest thing ever.

Runner up Psycho but it’s OK - I have never liked Kim Soo Hyun in anything before and the drama premise seemed WTF but it was shockingly good and KSH totally blew me away.

Hardest Working Lead

Yoon Shi Yoon - he starred in two (!!!) dramas in 2020 playing three characters and not only were both these dramas awesome in a lackluster year, but if it wasn’t for the fact that I knew it was the same actor and the fact that the characters shared a face, I would have never believed that they were played by the same actor. So good!

2020 DRAMAS I HAVEN’T SEEN THAT I MOST WANT TO WATCH

None. Covid Year gave me PLENTY of time

BEST NON-2020 DRAMA I’VE WATCHED IN 2020

My Beautiful Bride and Deserving of the Name - I was obsessed with both of them and honestly, they were much better than the bulk of 2020 kdramas I watched.

MOST ANTICIPATED IN 2021

The Moon That Rises in the Day, Hong Chun Gi, Joseon Exorcist, Island,  Frightening Cohabitation, Snowdrop.

[star-spangled-steve]

His New Partner

Chapter 42: The Depression

Series Masterlist

Previous Chapter

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Words: 2128

Warnings: Light angst, some sad!Steve, some fluff, mentions of pregnancy, one cuss word.

A/N: I hope you guys enjoy this!

“Hey, guys, look at this.” Y/N spoke in between giggles, gently holding up the raw cookie that she had just finished decorating. On the top was a smiley face made out of chocolate chips, and three, almost four years old Morgan seemed to like it just as much as she did.

“Smiley!” The little girl cheered, and Y/N nodded with a smile.

“Looks like we’re hanging with two children today, Pepper.” Natasha quipped as she lined one of the baking sheets with cookies.

Pepper chuckled as she put some of the dirty bowls and spoons in the dishwasher. “You say that, Nat, but I’ve watched you steal chocolate chips out of that bag for the past half hour.”

The redhead just rolled her eyes playfully, popping another chocolate chip into her mouth.

The women were having a ‘Girls’ Day’ at Tony and Pepper’s lakeside house, filled with hugs, laughs, minor gossip, and alas, baking. It was originally just going to be Y/N, Natasha, and Pepper, but Tony, the man who was supposed to watch Morgan, ended up having a few other things to do. So the child had joined them, not that the women had minded. Morgan was always a treat.

“Fine,” Y/N spoke playfully, “if you don’t like my cookie, Nat, then that’s okay. It’s coming home with me. You don’t even get to try my delicious smiley goodness.”

“Oh I’m heartbroken.” The assassin quipped, making all of the ladies laugh. Well, besides Morgan who was too busy playing with the raw cookie dough, and quite frankly not advanced enough to really understand what they were saying half the time. If their own husbands and male friends couldn’t keep up with them, how could one expect a three-year-old to?

Though, looking at sweet little, adorable Morgan, Y/N couldn’t help but feel a little pang in her chest. She wanted that; a child. She missed being a mother more than anyone could ever know. She’s thought about trying to have more kids in the future, but it always just brings back the terrible memories. The memories of being alone during her pregnancy, of having to raise her son on her own, and most awfully, her son dying right in front of her.

Steve had mentioned it a couple of times. But he could quickly see how uncomfortable the conversation had made her, and made sure to change the topic as fast as he could. He didn’t want to pressure her if she wasn’t ready, especially because of how last time went.

He had hope, though. They both did. Y/N hoped that she could get over her own fears, and Steve hoped that he could one day prove to her that there was nothing to be afraid of. He hoped that he could prove himself worthy of a second chance. That’s all he wanted.

Until then though, they would wait. No matter how badly both of them wanted to be parents. No matter how badly they wanted to fill that little hole in their lives.

“I see nothing but females and I feel outnumbered.”

The voice of one of the people she respected most in the word brought Y/N out of her thoughts. “Tony.” She breathed out, going in for a hug from her billionaire friend.

“Hey, sweet pea.” He greeted her in return, hugging her lovingly before pulling away. “How are ya’ doing?”

The woman gave him a small smile and a couple tiny nods. “Good. You?”

“Good.” The man replied, slightly ruffling her hair before going over to greet Natasha and give Pepper a peck on the lips.

“Daddy!” Morgan cheered, and Tony picked her up, placing her on his hip.

“Exactly who I came in to see.” He chuckled, bouncing her a bit. “You ladies mind if I steal her? Daddy has a couple cool things he wants to show her.”

Pepper smiles. “Go ahead. Just make sure that your ‘cool things’ aren’t too cool.”

“She means no weaponry, Stark.” Natasha stated, knowing that he would never show his daughter that anyways. Tony was a different person now. A family person who did normal, family things.

“Yeah, yeah, I know.”

Y/N watched as he and Morgan walked outside, wishing every bit of that for herself one day.

*****

“So, how’s Steve?”

Pepper’s question threw Y/N a bit off guard. Not because it was intrusive or unexpected; it was actually a very regular, polite thing to ask. No, it had just thrown her off guard because she knew that in fact, her husband was not doing too well.

Steve had been more sad lately. For the last few weeks, he’d seemed a bit more blue than he usually was in these times. Y/N guessed that it might have been A.J.’s birthday that threw him off, as it had just passed, but Thanos’ snap had taken place four years ago now. It couldn’t still be that, could it?

“He’s uh...” the young woman sighed, deciding to just be honest with them, “I don’t think he’s doing too great.” She watched as her friends frowned. “He’s just been a bit more sad lately, that’s all.”

“Well that’s unfortunate.” Pepper said sympathetically as Natasha nodded in agreement.

The three ladies were now sitting down in the living room, having some wine and catching up on life without having to be worried if a little child would hear.

Tony was still outside with Morgan even though it had been well over an hour now, but Pepper didn’t mind. She loved knowing that they were bonding as father and daughter.

“Yeah, well... I’m sure everything will be okay.” Y/N stated, honestly just trying to reassure herself. She hated it when her husband was upset.

“Yeah.” Natasha gave her a little smile, knowing how worried her friend could get sometimes.

It was about an hour or so later when Y/N and Natasha left the lakeside cabin, both going their own separate ways. Everyone gave each other a kiss on the cheek goodbye, including Tony and Morgan who were also going to miss the two women.

Y/N’s drive home was pretty smooth, relatively quiet. She was just looking forward to a nice, relaxing evening at home with her favourite man. Though, when she arrived, she very quickly realized that that was not going to happen.

“Steve?” She called out. “Stevie?” Again and again she shouted his name, never getting an answer in return. It was when she spotted a little note on her kitchen counter that she put it all together.

‘Just needed to clear my head. I should be home in a couple hours. Love you, doll.’

Somehow, Y/N knew exactly where he had gone and knew exactly what she needed to do.

The woman got right back in her car, hightailing it to the place that she knew Steve always went to be alone.

She knew that her going after him was kind of defeating the purpose of him even going to said place, but she had to talk to her husband. She had to figure out why he was so upset.

As soon as she had arrived, she hopped out of her car, and the shutting of her door alerted her husband of her presence.

“How’d you know where I was?” His deep voice questioned.

Y/N shrugged. “Just a hunch.” She walked up to where Steve was leaning on the railing of the old wooden bridge, the same one that he’d taken her to many years ago when he had proposed. She knew that it was still his special place and she could certainly see why. The spot was just as beautiful as the last time she had seen it.

The sky was dark, and they had a beautiful view of the stars this far away from all the city lights. Though even with all this beautiful nature in front of her, the only thing that Y/N could focus on was Steve.

“What’s going on?” She questioned, placing a gentle hand on his arm and stroking up and down. “Why have you been so sad lately?”

“You want the honest answer?” The man questioned, staring intently at the water in the lake. “Or the answer that won’t bring you down with me?”

Y/N gulped. “The honest one. Tell me everything. I want to cheer you up.” She leaned her head against his bicep, wrapping her other hand around his arm too and practically curled herself into his side. “You’ve been so distant these last few weeks. Since...”

“Since A.J.’s birthday.” Her husband finished for her. “Yeah, I know. It really... uh, it really hit me hard this year.”

She looked up at him caringly. “Any particular reason?”

“I want a kid.” Steve blurted out, deciding to just be completely honest with her about everything. He watched as her face looked almost spooked and decided to continue. “And I know, darling. I know that I have no right to ask for that again from you because of how it went last time. Believe me, I’m aware of how awful it was for you to go through that alone.” He turned so that he was fully facing her, taking both of her hands in his own. “And I know that with the trauma, you probably don’t even want to consider this again. It’s just... hearing you tell me last night that you were going to visit Tony and Pepper and... and Morgan today, it really hit me. I just want what they have so damn badly.”

Y/N nodded, small tears beginning to form in her eyes. “I want that too.”

Steve’s face instantly lightened up a bit. “Y-You do?”

“Yes.” The woman spoke, trying to blink back her tears. “I was thinking about it today too, and I really, really want a kid.”

“That-That’s great! That-”

“But I don’t think I’m ready.” She cut him off before his hopes got too high. “Not yet. Maybe soon, but... but not right now.”

“Oh.” Steve swallowed, trying not to show how disappointed he was. “Do you know when?”

Y/N puffed out a little breath. “No. But eventually.” She stepped a bit closer to him, leaning her chin right on his chest and looking up at him. “So many things didn’t go right last time. And I loved Anthony James, still love Anthony James so much, but... it was very, very hard on me emotionally. I just think that I need to completely heal from the first time before we get started on the second time.”

The man nodded, truly agreeing with every word she just said. “You’re right. I’m sorry for trying to rush you.”

She gave him a loving grin. “It’s okay. It’s nice to know that you want this. I just wish that there was a way to actually cheer you up.

Steve lightly chuckled. “Baby, just you being here was enough to cheer me up.”

Y/N gave him a small laugh, sheepishly biting her hip. “Yeah but... hmm... Oh! I have an idea!” She instantly lit up, bouncing on her toes a little. “Wait here.”

The woman ran back to her car as fast as she could before opening up the passenger side door, grabbing what she needed and jogging right back to him.

“Here.” She held out the item for him, watched as he raised his eyebrows with a smirk.

“A cookie?”

Y/N shook her head with a giggle. “No, silly. Not just any cookie, a smiley cookie!” In her hands was the special cookie that she had decorated that afternoon, chocolate chips on the top in the shape of a smiley face.

The man began to laugh at how adorable she was.

“We made cookies today at Pepper’s and I thought that it was a cute idea. I was going to eat it myself but, I think you need a smile more than I do right now.”

Steve’s heart was absolutely warmed. “You’re the sweetest, babydoll. Absolutely the sweetest.”

“I mean, maybe.” Y/N playfully shrugged, placing the cookie in his hands.

“How about we split it?” He asked, not wanting to eat it right in front of her while she had nothing.

“If you insist.”

Steve broke the cookie in half, letting her choose which side she wanted before they clinked the halves together as a form of cheers.

They ate in content silence until they were finished, and the man gave his wife a cookie crumbly kiss, wiping her mouth with his thumb afterwards.

“Thank you, Y/N. I love you.”

The woman smiled at him before leaning into his side and staring at the gorgeous stars above them, feeling a nice sense of peace wash over her. “I love you too. And there’s no need for you to thank me; I’ll always be happy to cheer you up.”

Next Chapter

Feedback is always welcome!❤️

[rgrettes]

heyy, I hope I'm not bothering but I've seen that you used to post about faberry and faberry fics like Shafd, and since I'm trying to find some faberry fanfics to read, could you please recommend me some of your favorites? Thank you :)

OKAY so this took me a whole lot longer than anticipated because I didn’t want to make it be like 500 fics long! But here, in no particular order, are my top 10 faberry fanfics! [excluding SHAfD of course bc whomever asked this definitely knows SHAfD!]I will be including trigger warnings/content warnings! Please be sure that you can handle the subjects before reading the content! Be safe and put your mental and physical wellbeing before a work of fiction!

10. Dirty Little Secret by patchesofink

Chapters: 77/77 [208k]

This fic would actually happen to be the first faberry fic that I ever read. I felt my little 15 year old self cry several times throughout this fic. It’s what first got me into writing fanfic, because I wanted to write as well as this author! There is a content warning so please be careful reading it if you are sensitive to topics mentioned!

Rachel has a secret and Quinn has figured it out - but will Quinn use this knowledge to exact revenge on Rachel for telling Finn that Puck was really the father or will she use her own experiences to help. WARNING - language and sexual content, r*pe.

9. I’ll Be by stix04

Chapters: 20/20 [330k]

God I was such a sucker for fake dating au’s as a young teenager and I’m most definitely a sucker for them now. This one I didn’t read right when it came out, I didn’t actually find it until it had finished but it still makes my top 20 because it’s just too good not to talk about!

Can Quinn pretend to be in love with Rachel just to get out of Lima? Can Rachel pretend to love Quinn so she's not so lonely in New York? And what happens when both girls realize they're no longer pretending?

8. Long Way to Happy by patchesofink 

Chapters: 42/42 [104k]

This is the sequel to Dirty Little Secret and makes the list for being just as good as the original. This author is so talented and the story just resonates in my soul! 

warnings for sexual content, language, violence and potential ptsd triggers!

Sequel to Dirty Little Secret. Rachel still has some healing to do as well with dealing with becoming a mom. Quinn has her own issues to deal with. Can their fledgling relationship deal with the ups and downs of life and cope with senior year? Quinn learns to open up and Rachel deals with motherhood and not letting her past define her. It's a Long Way to Happy.

7. Leather Jackets and Bad Coffee by antonius

Chapters: 11/?? [75k] [has not updated since 2018 :(]

Bikers, 50′s style diners, and good girl/bad girl pairing. Literally who could ask for anything more? I’m super sad this one hasn’t updated in a long time but it’s still such a fun read!!

warning for violence!

Ninety miles and nearly two hours from the heart of New York City, just off of PA-33 North, is the little town of Belfast, Pennsylvania: population 1,257. Right outside the city limits sits Moe's, a small 24-hour diner whose newest waitress, Rachel Berry, has taken her best friend Kurt's advice and started a calm summer temp job away from the hustle-and-bustle of busy city life in order to rest up before her final year at NYADA.During her very first midnight shift, she encounters a group of rowdy regulars led by a pink-haired woman with piercing hazel eyes. Quinn Fabray is the leader of the Skanks, a small but well-known local biker gang that doesn't take shit from anyone.So began the strangest summer of Rachel Berry's life.

6. Talk by saintdyke

Chapters: 17/? [43k] [last updated may 2019]

This is another one I’m sad hasn’t updated in a while! This honestly stole my heart to a point that in the time I found it in mid April 2019 and June of 2019 I have re-visited the fic 105 times, rereading it at least half as many as that. I’m really hoping the author comes back to the fic, because it was keeping me on the edge of my seat.

warning for violence, abuse mentions and depictions, homophobia and ptsd triggers!

(Previously titled Grease Stains, Starry Skies) Famous actress Rachel Berry’s car breaks down in the middle of nowhere. A pretty blonde with a blue truck rescues her from the side of the road, and just so happens to own an Auto Repair shop in town. Quinn is frustrating and mysterious, and Rachel is just as stubborn. Together, they start a revolution.

5. Just off the Key of Reason by iamapanda

Chapters: 30/30 [129k]

This one is another absolute classic in the Faberry fandom, and is another fic that has stuck with me throughout the years! It has a fantastic softer take on Quinn that I truly appreciated because everyone back in the early years of the fandom would make her so angry and bitter and she’s just so soft in some interpretations

Rachel Berry is a successful Broadway star with a new roommate, the very odd, naive Quinn Fabray. It starts with a note on the fridge and a childishly scrawled doodle of an elephant. Everybody has a little crazy in them.

4. Still off the Key of Reason by iamapanda

Chapters: 37/37 [185k]

The sequel to Just off the Key of Reason! Still as soft and as crazy! I can’t mention one without having the other in the list as well! I can’t explain how it feels to look at the ff.net pages after so long, my heart is transported back to 2011 and I’m sitting on my bed after I’m supposed to be in bed. I miss the days where I could just spend time reading these fics and not having adult responsibilities.

Quinn is thundering her way through vet school. Rachel is enlightening the west coast with her talent. The story continues with a wedding, dogs in tuxedos, and Pooh Bear vows. Crazy never fades.

3. A Million Miles of Fun by Jade8Devlin

Chapters: 12/12 [103k]

This one is a little different from the last ones! It isn’t my favorite because of its literary genius, but because of how fun and out there it is! It’s concept is fresh and dark and something I honestly didn’t expect to see but it quickly grew to be a favorite for me!

warning for violence, abuse, mentions of murder! the whole story revolves around The Unholy Trinity + Rachel murdering Quinn’s family so please take that into consideration!

And in Lima, Ohio, a man and woman were killed earlier today during what is believed to be a home invasion. Russell Fabray was last seen leaving Gas'N'Go at two o'clock; his wife, Judith, from a grocery story an hour earlier. Police are linking the double homicide to the area's recent surge in breaking and entering – though these appear to be the first fatalities. The victims are survived by their daughters; Quinn and Stacey."Jessalyn Briggs shuffles the papers on her desk, clearing her throat. The somber expression on her face seems to float off her as she turns towards camera 3."Otis-the-Otter finishes today's news headlines as the little critter that could. Abandoned by his mother and found foraging for scraps in the Nelson family's garbage cans, Otis has proven; if you can't teach an old dog new tricks, teach them to an otter! Otis placed second at this year's Ohio Dog Show after last year's well-documented struggle by the Nelson family to allow Otis to be included. Well done Otis, we here at Channel 43 salute you.

2. The Silence of Silence by your.kat

Chapters: 31/31 [135k]

This one... I can’t describe why I liked it, I just liked it.

warning for mental health, and trauma [possible others, please read with caution]

Quinn and Rachel meet at Haverbrook under unusual circumstances. Why is Rachel silent? And why does Quinn care? "You can hear," Quinn said simply, "but can you speak?"; "Yes," Rachel signed. "I can speak. But silence is a friend who will never betray."

1. Kissing Quinn Fabray by vondrunkaton

Chapters: 6/6 [45k]

This one just makes me super warm and fuzzy inside. I don’t think I can say it’s entirely changed my life but it’s just so soft and i love it

Quinn comforts Rachel after Finn says something oafish. Rachel is surprised by how sweet Quinn is. There's also some making out in delicious detail. Fluffy getting together fic.

I am super open to talking about more fics I love/like and other pairings! This was a ton of fun to talk about and sent me down memory lane! I went searching for two hours on a vague memory of a fic that I think has been deleted by now. But if anyone wants to help me track it down! Hit me up and I’ll give you the details!

[bobasheebaby]

75 Criminal Minds Prompts

Some of these can easily go very, very dirty, and yes I’m talking about Morgan and Garcia conversations and honestly would it be a list without them?

1 “You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you’ve really stopped to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do. ― Hotch

2 “Life is a hell of a thing to happen to someone.”― David Rossi

3 “Destroying a book is like…destroying a whole world.” — Diana Reid 

4 “Trust me, kiddo. I’ve been here before.” ― David Rossi

5 “I’ve always heard every ending is also a beginning. We just don’t know it at the time. I’d like to believe that’s true.” — Emily Prentiss 

6 “He is the perfect man. He doesn’t hog the covers, and he poops in a box.” — Emily Prentiss 

7 “Went on a diet last night. Lost 185 pounds.” — Dr. Tara Lewis 

8 “Marital bliss followed by marital diss! Of course. Why didn’t I think of that?” — Penelope Garcia

9 “I don’t take kindly to being blown up. In fact, it kind of pisses me off.” — Derek Morgan 

10 “You know, I've learned that, in the short time I've had the privilege of being a dad... it heals wounds, just being there for your kid.” — David Rossi

11 “What makes you feel confident?” “Statistics.” — Derek Morgan and Dr Spencer Reid

12 “NAME , believe me when I say this, I've never known a normal day in my entire life.” — Dr Spencer Reid

13 “The number of pathogens passed during a handshake is staggering. It's actually safer to kiss.” — Dr Spencer Reid

14 “No one gets therapy these days without a healthy dose of medication.” “What are you implying, NAME?” “That everyone is medicated.” — Dr Spencer Reid and Penelope Garcia

15 “He/She doesn't give a damn about black or white. The only color that son of a bitch cares about is green.” — Dr Spencer Reid

16 “I don't know everything. I mean, despite the fact that you think that I do.” “I never said that. When have I ever said that?” “Every day since I met you!” — Dr Spencer Reid and Derek Morgan

17 “I never have any normal fans.” — Dr Spencer Reid

18 “Hey, Baby Girl, whatever you’re doing, drop it.” — Derek Morgan

19 “Talk to me, Baby Girl.” — Derek Morgan

20 “There you go, Baby Girl, that’s sweet.” — Derek Morgan

21 “Give it to me, doll face.” — Derek Morgan

22 “Hey, doll face. Ready to work some magic for me?” — Derek Morgan

23 “Hey, silly girl. I love you, you know that, right?” — Derek Morgan

24 “Hey girl, you’re on speaker. Behave.” “Or what, you’ll spank me?” — Derek Morgan and Penelope Garcia

25 “It was once said that love is giving someone the ability to destroy you, but trusting them not to.” — Derek Morgan

26 “Hey baby girl, I need you to work that magic of yours.” “Rub my lamp, release the Genie.” — Derek Morgan and Penelope Garcia

27 “You really are afraid of the dark.” “I'm working on that.” “You should work a little harder.” — Derek Morgan and Dr Spencer Reid

28 “Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, pump your brakes. What is this about?” — Derek Morgan

29 “Oh, and if you hate sad stories as much as I do, you should leave the room right now, 'cause this is super sad!” — Penelope Garcia

30 “Enchantress of all things possible, use your imagination.” — Penelope Garcia

31 “My least three favorite words strung together: I don't know.” — Penelope Garcia

32 “Hello, my pretties. I have seen the wizard and he granted my wish.” — Penelope Garcia

33 “She knew where to toe the line between right and raunchy.” — Penelope Garcia

34 “OK, let me get you on a secret: Guys, we don’t do well on subtle clues, OK? You got to be direct, straight up. Just tell him exactly what you want!” — Derek Morgan

35 “It’s who you are, Baby Girl. You see the beauty in everything and everyone no matter where you go. That part of you is never gonna change, and I won’t let it.” — Derek Morgan

36 “NAME, people need to know that they're important and sometimes you forget that.” — Hotch

37 “Don't you have something better to do?” “Than to annoy you for three hours? Hell no.” — Hotch and Derek Morgan

38 “I think, deep down, we're all capable of unspeakable things. Where it starts or what you call it, I don't know.” — Hotch

39 “NAME, this is the job, and I need to know that you can be objective.” “And I need to know that I can be human.” — Hotch and Emily Prentiss

40 “Scars show us where we have been, they do not dictate where we are going.” — Rossi

41 “You don't need to do anything you don't want to. Understand?” — Rossi

42 “Just be careful. That ego of yours is going to get you in trouble." — Rossi

43 “Somewhere along the line, I put myself first. I admit it, but I can't go back and change it." — Rossi

44 “It could be that, after all of these years, I rewrote history." — Rossi

45 “Time will pass and slowly you will find how much it hurts. And, maybe, you'll find something else to fill that empty space." — Rossi

46 “Where you headed?” “Nowhere in particular.” “How will you know when you get there?” — Rose and Gideon

47 “Only a man would waste $50 trying to win back that $3 stuffed animal.” — JJ

48 “This is my favorite part. This is where you hang yourself with your own tongue. So, please keep talking.” — JJ

49 “My father/mother believes that children shouldn't be shielded from the realities of the world. I do! Isn't that why we read them fairy tales in the first place?” — JJ

50 “Oh god, please tell me you don't have a crush on a fictional character.” — JJ

51 “You are the best ever.” “Aw, and you're the most perceptive.” — JJ and Garcia

52 “I once dated a guy/girl who washed his/her car more than he/she washed his/her hair.” — JJ

53 “Don't tell me what I want and don't want.” — JJ

54 “You do what it takes to protect your family.” — JJ

55 “Look, I don't speak smartass.” — Michael Russo

56 “How's it having NAME around?” “You can have him/her back whenever you would like.” Hotch and Garcia

57 “So, NAME, when are you and NAME walking down the aisle?” “Hey, whoa, whoa. Baby steps. Baby steps.” “When NAME says "I do", it'll be a national day of mourning for single men/women everywhere.” — Rossi, Morgan and Reid

58 “Ugh! This heat is brutal!” “You know, it isn't so much the heat as it is the humidity.” “At some point, it doesn't matter how you look at it. It all sucks.” — Derek Morgan and Dr Spencer Reid

59 “Need a minute?” “So, so badly.” — Matt Simmons and Penelope Garcia

60 “Hey. I came as soon as I could. What's wrong?” — Matt Simmons

61 “We ask questions, and we come home.” “No creepy weirdness?” “No weirdness.” “Good, 'cause I'm about full up in the creepy weirdness department for one night.” — Matt Simmons and Penelope Garcia

62 “Ooh, what about this one? Sunny, two-bedroom. It's close to work. And it's in your price range.” “NAME, you're moving? You don't like change.” “That's true. Change is my kryptonite. But the apartment is no longer a sanctuary. I have a new neighbor. Window's right here. He enjoys doing naked kung fu. Some things you cannot unsee.” — JJ, Simmons and Garcia

63 “Thank you.” “For what?” “For being you.” “Aw, thanks. I don't know how to be anyone else.” — Emily Prentiss and Dr Spencer Reid

64 “When a woman tells a man about her feelings, she doesn't want him to fix her. She wants him to shut up and listen.” — Emily Prentiss

65 “I just feel I can't understand others' emotions if I don't deal with my own, you know?” “The best way out is always through.” “Too bad it's not always the easiest one.” “You're not kidding.” — Dr Tara Lewis and Rossi

66 “It helps if they think you're crazy. They don't argue.” — Diana Reid

67 “I don’t hate you ... I’m just not necessarily excited about your existence.” — Dr Spencer Reid

68 “There are many paths to the same place. Trust me.” “Just so you know, you sound like a fortune cookie.” — Hotch

69 “I’m always right. Also, you’re secretly in love with me.” — Penelope Garcia

70 “I just gave the bartender my number in Roman numerals. If he/she figures it out, he’s/she’s worth a shot.” — Dr Spencer Reid

71 “Shh, the adults are talking. When it’s your turn to speak, I’ll give you permission. Okay?” — JJ

72 “Hey, mama, tell me something I don’t know.” — Derek Morgan

73 “Talk dirty to me.” — Penelope Garcia

75 “Hey, don’t make me spank you when I get back.” “Don’t listen time him/her, NAME, he’s/she’s all talk.” — Derek Morgan and Dr Spencer Reid

[jess-rewatches-prodigalson]

Episode 3: Fear Response

You know the drill. Thoughts with time stamps coming your way.

SPOILERS AHEAD

0:55 - Is Martin really that delusional? He killed people and he thinks his wife isn’t going to divorce him?!? 

1:23 - “A woman overlooks things.” No. I’m sorry. But Jessica’s mother sounds kind of awful. No one should have to overlook “things” in a marriage. Communicate people. Don’t settle. Compromise. Love. Forgive. Don’t overlook red flags.

1:47 - Lay down the law Jessica. That’s my girl. This is the moment I fell in love with Jessica. 

3:19 - Malcolm leaves his phone in another room when he sleeps? Good for him. My technology addicted ass could never do that. Plus it’s my alarm clock so you know - there’s that. 

3:30 - Jessica owns the building Malcolm lives in. This raises a lot of questions for me about Malcolm’s finances. He was clearly getting paid by the FBI. I assume the NYPD is also paying him. Does he have access to the family money? Is he paying rent for his loft? Or does he live rent free because it’s the “family building”?!? The finances of people who grew up rich is such a mystery to me. How does it work when your rich parents are still alive? 

3:49 - He flung himself out a window. He was having a nightmare and it caused him to fling himself out a window while he was still asleep. This. Boy. Needs. A. Hug. Also real sleep. And peace. 

4:48 - “I just watched you throw yourself out a window.” Did you see Malcolm’s facial expression after she said that. It was a look that says “I know I’m broken. I don’t like it. I’m sorry. I’m doing my best. I’m ashamed.”

5:10 -  He knows. He knows his mental health is a mess but he lies to his mother anyways. He wants to be brave for her. He doesn’t want her to worry about him. She’s suffered enough. She’s worried enough. He doesn’t want to be a burden. My heart breaks for Malcolm in this scene.

5:35 - Look I have personal issues with shrinks but I’m really happy Malcolm has someone to talk to. Also she’s such a cool therapist. She’s kind and respectful without being demeaning and coddling. 

7:00 - I LOVE that Malcolm is sitting with his legs folded. It’s super cute. Also it reinforces the idea that he’s in a vulnerable state.

7:22 - Does Malcolm have social anxiety? The way he approaches this crime scene it almost looks like he’s rehearsing what he’s going to do/say when he arrives. It’s a very common social anxiety habit. 

7:38 - He took enough lollipops to share. That might be the sweetest thing in the world. Gil looks so happy. Dani and JT look so confused. I wonder if Malcolm is sharing lollipops to subtly tell Gil that he’s seeing his therapist and he’s getting help. 

8:11 - Another awkward Edrisa and Bright interaction. I’m cringing. 

8:50 - Do you ever wonder what Mr.David’s job description is? I do. I mean does he just stand there watching Martin all day. Is he supposed to talk to Martin? Is he supposed to prevent Martin from hurting himself? I mean I love Mr.David but if Martin is alone in his room why does Mr.David need to be there? Martin is chained to the wall. 

10:10 - Oh hell no. That’s nasty. Also Malcolm looks way too excited about the brain removal. 

10:34 - Ok. So I don’t ship Maldrisa. BUT that little smile that Malcolm just gave Edrisa is warming my cold, dead heart. 

11:05 - The victim was scared to death. Malcolm is currently suffering from increased mental distress caused by his father and extreme night terrors. And now the victim has been scared to death. Irony? Foreshadowing?

12:03 - hahaha Gil’s face. He’s like “I can’t explain that boy’s behaviour.”.

12:07 - STOP. Right now. Does Malcolm really have his own desk?!? So he’s like officially employed right? This isn’t some irregular consultation gig that Gil has arranged. Our boy has a desk. Our boy is permanent. I am so happy. 

12:30 - Mr.David doesn’t deserve to have to bend to Martin’s will.  “Could you mute that please”. That man better be getting a pretty penny from this job. 

12:40 - How does Martin get this case info?!? I don’t see the newspapers/newscasts mentioning the incision on the side of the victim’s skull. 

13:30 - Oh and whose fault is that Martin? Ugh. I wish Martin just wouldn’t talk to Malcolm anymore. He really aggravates Malcolm’s anxiety.

14:33 - I am both touched and slightly creeped out that Gil has been staring at Malcolm through a window while he was on the phone. 

15:07 - Fanboy alert. It’s honestly so freaking sweet to see Malcolm this excited....but it’s really not the time. 

16:10 - What exactly does Jessica do all day? Does she just watch the news and keep tabs on her children? That’s kind of sad. For Jessica. I wish she were able to have more of a social life despite what Martin did.

17:12 - Ainsley, sweetheart, I love you. I see where you’re coming from. But your Mother did the right thing for you. You shouldn’t have to remember a monster. 

18:40 - Dang. Dani looks beautiful in that shade of blue. 

19:30 - Do you ever wonder why Malcolm doesn’t carry a gun with the NYPD? He’s qualified to carry a gun since he used to work for the FBI. Do you think he’s not allowed to carry one since he’s technically not a police officer with the NYPD? I prefer to believe that he refuses to carry a gun with the NYPD because he’s terrified of what he might do with a gun. To a suspect. To himself (presuming he stores it at home when he’s not working).

20:12 - Again. Malcolm is not a killer. Look at his concern for Dr. Brown in this scene.

21:21 - JT’s writing the report. Do they all have to make a report for every case or do they take turns writing a single report (like a group project) for every case? I’m very curious. 

21:23 - oooooohhhh Dad is angry. And concerned. 

21:50 - Do you ever wonder what classes Bright took in university? I do. He has a degree in psychology but he seems to know a lot about specific medications, medical conditions, and medicine in general. Is that because of Martin? Maybe? But a lot of his knowledge seems way beyond what a 10 year old could understand and retain. 

24:10 - I love this scene. It suggests that there was a point in time when Gil and Jessica talked frequently. Maybe they were even friends. It suggests that they bonded over how much they love Malcolm. Makes me wonder what kind of a relationship Gil has/had with Ainsley.

27:48 - This. This is how much Jessica loves Malcolm. Yes she oversteps boundaries and she can come across as cold and distant. BUT she is willing to see a man that terrifies her. Who caused her so much pain. A man that she hates. Simply because she wants to keep her son healthy and safe. That right there is a good mother. 

28:28 - This is my favourite running gag of the series. I genuinely want to know what JT stands for. If it’s not something ridiculous like “James Tiberius” or “Justin Timberlake” because JT’s parents were big nerds I will be so disappointed. 

29:00 - This conversation about trust and respect between JT and Malcolm is everything. It really solidifies their friendship. You can tell that from this point onward JT is much warmer toward Malcolm. I love this. So much. 

29:15 - What branch of the military was JT a part of? Marine? Air Force? Army? Navy?

30:08 - Malcolm’s list of diagnoses. Yikes. :( My heart is shattered.  

30:21 - The look in Malcolm’s eyes here. Just. No. Ouch. That hurts. This boy needs a hug. 

32:30 - I kind of don’t feel bad for this woman. She kind of sucks.

32:50 - I like to believe that JT is texting his wife in this scene. I like to believe he’s telling her about how he got stuck babysitting the weirdo who keeps guessing what his name stands for. 

32:52 - I’m sorry. What? What did JT see that caused him to get out of the car. Malcolm hasn’t called him yet and that house looks normal on the outside. 

34:14 - The fact that Malcolm can empathize with killers is beautiful and terrible. It’s a wonderful quality but it’s probably not great for his mental health.

34:55 - That’s a concussion.

36:15 - I get the feeling that half the time when Malcolm’s talking down a killer he’s really talking to himself. That breaks my heart.

36:38 - Malcolm’s manic guesses of JT name is very concerning. I’m worried for this boy. I really hope someone got him checked out for a concussion.

37:12 - Ugh. Don’t look at her like she’s a piece of meat. 

37:33 - The way Jessica and Martin interact really makes me question what their married relationship was like. Did they argue a lot? Did they show a lot of PDA? I have questions.

38:30 - The way Jessica insults Martin is my favourite thing. It’s freaking hilarious.

39:10 - If Martin is a psychopath he legitimately can’t feel pride for his children. Right? So he’s lying here?

40:40 - What was the whole story? What did Jessica do? Was it the alcoholism? Is that what he’s referring to?

42:00 - DUDE. Please don’t drug yourself. You are so desperate for answers that you’ve become self-destructive. I want you to be safe. 

I love this show. Ugh. If you read through any of this - thanks for hanging out. I hope to post my thoughts on the next episode soon. 

[the--blackdahlia]

Too Young to Fall in Love Chapter 42 (Dirt!Nikki x Reader)

Title: Too Young to Fall in Love 42

Summary: Nikki Sixx was a hard partying musician on the strip. He never expected to fall in love with anyone, until a girl knocked on his dressing room door looking for a ride home and took his breath away. Just like everything else Nikki did; the drugs, the money, the music; Nikki went hard with love. (Y/n) Bass never expected the bassist of Motley Crue to be the one to shake her calm and calculated life up. She had a plan. Graduate school, become an epic producer, and watch from behind the scenes as her brother’s band rose to fame. Nikki and (Y/n) were perfect for each other, too bad her brother, Tommy, didn’t think so.

Series warnings:  Smut (18+ Please), drug use, language, referenced miscarriage, drug overdose, mentioned attempted suicide, out of character moments for everyone in the band, the timeline might be a little screwy but it’s fanfiction! I know nothing of music production and my medical knowledge is really screwy, so it won’t be accurate.

Nikki woke up the next morning to Ziggy whimpering. With a groan he got up and put on his robe. He was happy, everything was in place to ask (Y/n) to marry him. He just needed the ring once it was done and the perfect carnival setting. He looked at the empty bed before heading out. It felt weird not having her there with him when he woke up. He let Ziggy out and went about his morning routine. Making coffee he smiled when he heard the front door open and (Y/n) coming in.

She tiptoed in, not wanting to wake Nikki up. But Ziggy saw her through the patio door and started barking like crazy, making Nikki laugh. (Y/n) went to the kitchen and smiled at him.

“Hey babe. You’re awake early.” (Y/n) kissed his cheek.

“Ziggy,” he said and pulled her in for a deep kiss. “You look like you have fun with Nessa, how’s she doing? And … how’s Vince?”

“I guess he spends more time at the bar than he does at home,” (Y/n) sighed. “She needed the spa day. She’s taking it all pretty hard.” She leaned up against the counter. “So I might have heard something from a friend at Elektra.”

“Yeah?” Nikki sighed. He sighed, he was trying to make sure that if they got dropped the label would let the Cure keep all ownership of their songs.

“According to her, they want John out, which we knew.” She told him. “And...I heard they might not be interested in renewing the contract when it comes up due again.” She went to Nikki and handed him an envelope. “That’s why I did this.” He opened the envelope to see a copyright form for the name Motley Records. “I’m gonna get your masters back. Elektra doesn’t know who they’re dealing with.”

Nikki picked her up and spun her around, “have I mentioned that I love you sweet girl?”

“Once or twice.” She laughed, kissing him gently. “What about now our next goal being that we save the singer?”

“Yeah, let’s save the singer,” he said and kissed her deeply.  

“But first, I think I want some time with you.” She smiled and took his hand, leading her to the bedroom.

Nikki gave her a devilish grin as he picked her up over her shoulder and smacked her ass.. “That is perfect!” he laughed as he carried her up the stairs and payfully tossed her onto the bed. Taking off his robe he jumped on next to her and laughed. With a smiled he turned over and said, “Night.”

“It’s morning!” (Y/n) laughed. “I guess I’ll just go use my other boyfriend.” She smirked and went to get something from her drawer.

“Wait, what?” Nikki turned over and pulled her close to him. “What are you talking about?”

“My battery operated boyfriend.” She laughed. “You know you’re the only one I want to be with.” She kissed him gently.

“Oh!” he smiled, “well… we could always bring him out to play,” Nikki wiggled his eyebrows before kissing her deeply.

“Why? Do you wanna watch?” She moaned into the kiss.

“That would be a sight,” he said as he held her tight and rolled over having her straddle him.

“Oh?” She rubbed against him some. “What if I’d rather give you the best blowjob of your life?”

“Fuck… you’re already the best thing in my life,” he moaned as he helped take off her shirt. She moved her hips against him, feeling some twitching.

“Let’s get you out of those boxers Mr. Sixx.” (Y/n) whispered.

Nikki chuckled as he laced his thumbs through the elastic as she lifted herself up and pulled down his boxers. Laying back he smiled up at her. The light in her eyes was back, she was glowing, and he wanted nothing more than to love her over and over and over again all over the house. He looked at her and caressed her bare skin as she unhooked her bra. This thumbs grazing over her nipples and he smirked as she moaned.  

She moved down between his legs and teasingly licked the head of his cock. She smirked when he heard a noise come from his mouth.

“What was that baby?” She asked.

“Minx,” he murmured and sighed. “Love you.”

“Love you more.” She said before taking him into her mouth as deep as she could before the head hit her throat. She slowly started bobbing her head, using her hand to cover what she hadn’t fit in her mouth. Yet.

“Fuck,” Nikki moaned as he bucked his hips gently. Just the feel of her mouth on him was sending him close to the edge. “If you don’t stop I’m gonna blow right down your throat sweet girl. And I haven’t made you cum yet.” She just looked up at him before continuing her motions. He did so much for her. She wanted to do something for him. She reached down and cupped his balls, giving them a slight squeeze as she continued to bob her head. Nikki threw his head back at the sensation, he was in pure bliss. He could feel himself get close his breath becoming ragged as she pleased him.

“(Y/n),” he let out as he came in her mouth. She took it all in and looked into his eyes as she swallowed it. She crawled up the bed to lay by her.

“How do you feel?” (Y/n) asked, rubbing his arm.

“Very, very, very relaxed sweet girl,” he muttered as he pulled her in for a kiss. His hand cupped her face, his thumb caressing her cheek as he gazed into her eyes,“Love you.”

“Love you too.” She leaned into his touch. “I know it’s been years, but I’m still glad I picked LA over London.”

“I’m glad you did too,” he sighed and smiled at her. “Ok, I need to get up. I think Mick and I should work on Vince. Not sure what we should do about Tommy. Maybe I should go talk to him first?” Nikki sat up and stretched.

“Maybe I should go talk to Tommy while you work on Vince?” She suggested.

“I don’t want him hurting you,” Nikki sighed as he got dressed. “I’ll talk to him and see what he was thinking when he took your notebook…” Nikki closed his eyes and sighed. He remembered some of the dark things he wrote in his during his withdrawal period.

“Did you end up reading anything in it?” She asked, sitting up on the bed, wearing just her underwear.

Nikki shook his head, “I wasn’t sure if you wanted me to so I left it alone,” he told her honestly.  She went to her office and grabbed it, handing it to him.

“It’s mainly song lyrics, and I give you permission to use them. If he would’ve asked, I would’ve gave it to him too.” She smiled. “I’m gonna get dressed. I’ll go deal with my brother and if anything happens, I’ll call you, okay?”

“OK,” Nikki nodded as he kissed her and pressed his forehead against hers.

**********

(Y/n) looked at the address on the paper and double checked it on the house. Walking up to it, she rang the doorbell. A familiar looking blonde woman answered the door. She smiled when she saw (Y/n).

“(Y/n)!” She laughed, hugging her. “Come in, come in. Tommy’s out on the dock.”

“Oh, hi Pamela. I wasn’t sure if anyone was home.” (Y/n) made her way in. “Is Tommy okay? I hadn’t heard from him in awhile.”

“He’s been a bit sad,” she admitted. “I think he misses the band with Nikki, but he’s still making music with his band.”

“Do you mind if I go out and see him?” (Y/n) asked.

“No, go right ahead,” she smiled and led the way to the dock. Tommy was sitting there, staring out over the water. (Y/n) walked out and set by him.

“Hey T-bone.” (Y/n) said softly. “How are you doing?”

“Fine,” he sighed as he took a chug of his beer. “Why are you here? I thought you hated me?”

“You might piss me off, but I’ve never hated you.” (Y/n) told him. “Elektra is going to drop the Crue because they suck now.” She laughed. “I say it’s because my favorite drummer isn’t there.”

“You look happier,” he murmured. “Besides, Nikki hates me… I’ve been nothing but a dick.”

“I’ll have you know he was going to come out here and talk to you himself, but I told him to go with Mick and talk to Vince. Get him out of the bar,” She looked at the beer cans around him. “Which I think is what you need to do too…” She sighed. “Anyway, I brought you a peace offering.” She handed him a piece of paper. “No strings attached.” She stood up.

“What is it?” he looked at the paper and stared at it. “Wait this is… you’re letting me use it?”

“Yep. You don’t even have to credit me for it.” She sighed. “I guess I’ll leave you alone now.”

“(Y/n),” he called out to her.

“Yeah?” She turned to look at him.

“Thanks,” he smiled. “I um… I’ll call Nikki later.”

“You better.” She smiled and left. He sat back down. He looked at the paper and the beer. He sat the beer down.

“Hello, again, hello there. It's been so long. And this place is not the same without you.” Tommy sang softly, reading over the words on the paper.

****

Nikki sat in his bass room practicing his skills. He just let himself get lost in the strumming of his bass. He and Mick would meet here before going to see Vince. Since Vince lost Skylar he wasn’t sure what to say.

“Hey bass player,” Mick said, making his way into the bass room. “Just got off the phone with Vanessa. She told me what bar he’s at.”

“Ok,” he but the bass down and shook out his hands. “Lets go talk to him… I’m worried about (Y/n) though, she went to talk to Tommy.”

“Alone? Is she crazy?” Mick asked. “Didn’t he leave bruises on her not too long ago?”

“Yeah he did, she insisted on going and I just hope nothing happened,” he shook his head and grabbed his keys. “Come on, lets go get Vince.”

Mick followed him out to the car. They drove to the bar Vanessa told them to go to. Through the smoke, they saw Vince sitting at the bar, nursing a beer.

“You know man, they were so much better with you Vince.” The bartender told him as he leaned against the bar.

“They’re happy I’m not there.” Vince grumbled. The bartender looked up and smiled.

“I got a bassist and a guitarist that say otherwise.” The bartender laughed.

“Hey Vince,” Nikki took a seat on the stool next to him.

“What are you doing here?” Vince grumbled. “Here to rub it in about how much fun you’re having with John Corn-on-the-cobi?”

“I’m keeping that one.” Mick chuckled.

“Actually he sucks,” Nikki shook his head. “I mean for the Crue sound… he just isn’t for us.”

“Heard Tommy quit too.” Vince sighed. “Guess the bands just falling apart, isn’t it?”

“I’m sorry man…” Nikki looked down at his hands. “I know you’re battling your own demons and I should have helped you better…” The door opened then and Tommy came in, looking around. He saw the guys over at the bar and stood by Mick.

“Hey guys.” Tommy said softly.

Nikki looked at him and took a deep breath hoping (Y/n) was ok.

“I...can we get a table and talk? All of us?” Tommy asked. “Please?”

“Come on Vince,” Nikki muttered as he helped Vince off the stool and to a table nearby. They all sat down. Tommy took a drag off his cigarette.

“I’m sorry about Skylar.” He whispered to Vince. “I can’t even imagine something so awful.” Vince started to cry then.

“How is this fucking fair? She was only four!” He cried. “She didn’t get to do anything she wanted to do! She...she told me she wanted to be a princess astronaut that played guitar and drums. She never even got to try that man.”

Nikki stayed silent and closed his eyes. He in a way knew what Vince was talking about. His own unborn child never even got a chance to live. He looked over at VInce and gave him a hug. “We’re here for you man. And Vanessa… I mean she’s worried about you Vince.”

“I don’t deserve her.” Vince whispered. “She puts up with all my shit and she still loves me. How did we get such awesome girls in our lives? I mean, we weren’t exactly saints.”

“I don’t know but… don’t do this to yourself man,” Nikki shook his head. “You know she’ll be there for you so you can always talk to us and we can always help each other out.” Nikki offered Vince a small smile. Vince ran a hand down his face and sighed.

“What do we do now?” Vince asked. “Oh, Nikki, I did something for you last night. Early birthday present or whatever.”

“Vince you didn’t have to man,” Nikki whispered. In all honesty he had forgotten his own birthday was coming up.

“Trust me, you’ll like it.” Vince turned to the TV with a smile. The bartender switched it to MTV. It was about news time. And when the news came on, Mick and Tommy’s eyes got wide.

Because Bret Michaels had been beat up by an unnamed source.

“He came in here talking shit about you and saying how much better he was for (Y/n). But as the drinks kept coming, he started to call her a slut and, I just can’t have that. So, my hand may have slipped a time or two.” Vince shrugged, looking back at Nikki.

Nikki gave  Vince a pat on the shoulder, “thanks man.” Vince offered him a small smile. Tommy took another drag off his cigarette.

“So, when do we get rid of Corn-on-the-cobi?” Mick asked with a chuckle.

“Let’s go,” Nikki smiled.

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[caws5749]

1-85 (:

1. Are looks important in a relationship? Um not really??

2. Are relationships ever worth it? Uh yeah I think so

3. Are you a virgin? No

4. Are you in a relationship? Yeah

5. Are you in love? No comment

6. Are you single this year? Uhh no? Cuz of 4? Am I understanding this right?

7. Can you commit to one person? Yes

8. Describe your crush. she's such a dork and it's the cutest thing. Bc she will like be all serious and stuff but then ridiculously silly and the contrast is so funny and adorable. She's also insanely sweet, but it's not in the typical way. She also cares about a lot about things, and the passion that radiates thru her when she talks about those things is really admirable. I could also get lost in her eyes. She's impulsive sometimes and her thoughts are sometimes in every which way, but it's adorable. Also she's hot.

9. Describe your perfect mate. someone who understands me.

10. Do you believe in love at first sight? No

11. Do you ever want to get married? Yes

12. Do you forgive betrayal? Depends what kind of betrayal

13. Do you get jealous easily? YES

14. Do you have a crush on anyone? Um..yeah

15. Do you have any piercings? Just my ears

16. Do you have any tattoos? Yes I have 6

17. Do you like kissing in public? Little kisses yes, making out no

20. Do you shower every day? Yeah p much

21. Do you think someone has feelings for you? Yeah

22. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now? Umm idk

23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat? Definitely

24. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years? No

25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year? Yes

26. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you? Um maybe?

27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you? Dont think so

28. Have you ever been cheated on? Don't think so, maybe my first bf?

29. Have you ever cheated on someone? HELL NO

30. Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body? Yes, idk more plump lips maybe a diff nose

31. Have you ever cried over a guy/girl? Both

32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love? No

33. Have you ever had sex with a man? NO

34. Have you ever had sex with a woman? Yes

35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you? Yes

36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends? Yes

37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated? Um I don't think so?

38. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to? Yes

39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have? Yes?

40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone? Umm I don't think so

41. Have you had sex so far this year? Yes

42. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander? Lmao NOT LONG

43. How long was your longest relationship? 1.5 yrs I think

44. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had? Uhhhh 3??

45. How many people did you kiss in 2011? Zero

46. How many times did you have sex last year? Zero

47. How old are you? 21

48. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say? Okay

49. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her? Ooh that's tough. Prob her willingness to help others/kind heart

50. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept? Um yeah but this is like a tough one to answer for those who don't know what's up in my life cuz it's well yeah

51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for? No. I don't think so

52. Is there anyone you’ve given up on? Why? Yeah I think so. She's just never going to be who I want her to be.

53. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are? Not that I know of

54. Is there someone you will never forget? Yes there are several.

55. Share a relationship story. A few years ago, my gf came out to visit me in California. When I saw her walking towards me in the airport, all the emotional pain I was feeling about California went away, and I felt just pure happiness looking at her.

56. State 8 facts about your body. This one is weird. I have an area of edema in my left foot that will prob never go away. I frequently pick at my fingers. I have a butterfly ish shaped birthmark. I have an area on my finger that's all discolored, and people usually think I've hurt myself somehow. I have lots of freckles. I'm pale. My hair on my body is pretty light, so I can get away with not shaving often. My ears aren't symmetric.

57. Things you want to say to an ex. Nothing

58. What are five ways to win your heart? Be romantic. Ask me about my day. Compliment me. Hold my hand/keep a hand on my lower back/any sweet touches I'll melt. Kiss me often.

59. What do you look like? (Post a picture!)

60. What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners? Not even a year.

61. What is the first thing you notice in someone? Whether they only talk about themselves.

62. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you? Um. This ones. Real personal. Um. Idk. gonna keep it general. Lingerie?

63. What is your definition of “having sex”? Nope.

64. What is your definition of cheating? Nope.

65. What is your favourite foreplay routine? NOPE.

66. What is your favourite roleplay? never have, well, wait.. does good/bad girl sorta count

67. What is your idea of the perfect date? Classy, romantic dinner, with champagne and nice food, subtle touches

69. What turns you off? Someone who only talks about themselves.

68. What is your sexual orientation? Lesbian

70. What turns you on? A lot.

71. What was your kinkiest wet dream? Um.. nope.

72. What words do you like to hear during sex? You're beautiful. You're sexy. Cum for me.

73. What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you? Take me on a surprise date.

74. What’s the most superficial characteristic you look for? ?? Does this mean body stuff? Idk nice eyes?

75. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you? Come to Cali. Come over to my house when I was sad.

76. What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone? I honestly don't know?

77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships? Um just not too big a gap ig

78. What’s your dirtiest secret? NOPE

79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why? Idk today? Of my cousin? I'm a super jealous person

80. When was the last time you told someone you loved them? Today

81. Who are five people you find attractive? NATASHA ROMANOFF/SCARLETT JOHANSSON, my gf, Priyanka Chopra, Nick Jonas, Emilia clarke

82. Who is the last person you hugged? My grandma

83. Who was your first kiss with? My first bf

84. Why did your last relationship fail? no.

85. Would you ever date someone off of the Internet? Um ?

[tomhtrash-blog]

Wrong Number(Tom Hiddleston): September Year One

Series Masterlist

2 September

Tom  6:43: Good morning, darling. Just woke up and I’m about to head out on my morning run, hope you slept well.

Sarah 9:17: You are very strange, Tom. Waking up early just to run, actually enjoying it, how do you do it?

Tom 9:24: I just do, if I go a day without a run that day is just no good. There is something so peaceful about running in the morning, the quiet sounds of the earth, the cool and crisp air, and just the calm view of the town.

Sarah 9:27: Wait, are you telling me you don’t even listen to music while you run?

Tom 9:29: I am definitely not saying that. Some days it’s just that I prefer to listen to the natural sounds of the world, but I usually do listen to something.  

Sarah 9:30: What do you listen to?

Tom 9:34: It really depends on the day, what I listen to most days is a little embarrassing so I think I’ll keep that to myself until it’s of good use.

Sarah 9:35: There is nothing to be embarrassed about, a persons taste in music is a part of what makes that person who they are. So whatever it is, you can tell me, hell you can tell the whole world, because it is an important piece of you.

Tom 9:37: Alright, but swear you won’t judge me?

Sarah 9:39: I swear *raises right hand*

Tom 9:41: Starships, Nicki Minaj.

Sarah 9:42: That’s a really good song! I remember when that song came out a friend and I did an arrangement of it for a project, she did the backing tracks while I sang all vocals.

Tom 9:45: Every time you mention your singing my interest grows, I am just dying to hear your voice.

Sarah 9:46: I have a recording that I recently did for class, I could send it to you if you’d like.

Tom 9:47: I would love that, darling. Send away.

Sarah 9:51: Audio message:;My Bucket's Got A Hole In It -, 11.16 AM.mp3

Tom 9:58: Sarah, you have a marvelous singing voice! Are you playing guitar as well?

Sarah 10:01: It’s the ukulele, actually, but yes I am. I’m glad you like it.

Tom 10:02: Like it? I love it! What made you choose that song?

Sarah 10:05: It’s one of my favourites from the I Saw The Light soundtrack, and I love the original version as well. The chord progression is fairly simple so I was able to learn it quiet quickly.

Tom 10:07: Well, you sounded wonderful, darling. Do you listen to a lot of Hank Williams Sr.?

Sarah 10:08: Not really, when I listen to those songs they’re usually from the movie, I absolutely adore the way his voice sounds. I could listen to him sing for hours, and I have before. After first seeing the movie I spent the next few weeks only listening to him.

Tom 10:13: Wow, you’re a true fangirl, aren’t you?

Sarah 10:14: In a way, but I am not the obsessive, stalking, build a shrine, dedicate my life kind of fangirl. I appreciate him for all he has done and respect his privacy.

Tom 10:17: That’s good to hear. Some people just don’t understand that actors are people too.

Sarah 10:19: That’s what I always say! They are the same as everyone else, only that every decision or action of theirs is known by the world.

Tom 10:24: I know, even if they simply take a stroll through the park it will be on the cover of something within the next couple of days, and with the internet and social media the way it is almost everything is instant now.

Sarah 10:27: It must be hard to live life that way.

Tom 10:30: But there are good things and bad things in every situation, darling. In my opinion the feeling of having loving fans and enjoying your work could possibly make up for the media’s attention.

Sarah 10:33: That is a good point.

Tom 10:33: Could you ever see yourself living that sort of life?

Sarah 10:35: Not really, but if it were to happen to me I would embrace it and most likely love it.

Tom 10:38: Well, darling, with your voice I can see it happening to you any day now. :)

Sarah 10:53: You’re too sweet.

Tom 10:56: I’m honest, Sarah.

*****************

15 September

Tom 4:38: Happy Friday, love. Hope your day is going well.

Sarah 5:12: Happy Friday to you as well, Tom. I’m sorry I’m sorry it took me so long to reply, but I just got off of work.

Tom 5:15: No worries. Do you have any interesting plans for the weekend?

Sarah 5:16: I do, actually. A few friends are taking me out drinking tomorrow night to celebrate my birthday.

Tom 5:18: Is it your birthday tomorrow?

Sarah 5:19: It’s Sunday, but they have work and I have classes Monday morning so we decided Saturday would be best.

Tom 5:23: Well, happy early birthday. Should I get you a gift? I’m not really sure what is proper edicate when your ‘texting only, don’t know very much information about, never met in person, no idea what they look like, twelve years younger than you’ friend has a birthday.

Sarah 5:26: I don’t think there is proper edicate for that, you old dork.

Tom 5:33: Old? Darling, I am many things, but I am not old.

Sarah 5:38: Whatever you say, old man.

***************

16 September

Sarah 7:42: Heading out for the night, just wanted to let you know in case I don’t reply for a while.

Tom 7:45: Have fun, darling.

Tom 8:36: How are things going, Sarah? Having fun, I hope.

Sarah 9:27: A blast! Karaoke, dancing, flirting with random strangers, random strangers flirting with me, guys asking me how it’s possible that I’m single, and most importantly, the alcohol. It’s a pretty great night so far!

Tom 9:32: Glad to hear that. Just be careful, alright?

Sarah 9:56: I always am, Tom.

Tom 11:55: SARAH I HAVE AMAZING NEWS

Sarah 11:56: What is it?

Tom 11:56: It’s your birthday in four minutes :)

Sarah 11:58: You’re a dork. How has your night been?

Tom 11:59: We can talk about that later, because your birthday is just moments away!

Tom 11:59: Any second now

Tom 11:59: Any

Tom 11:59: Second

*****

17 September

Tom 12:00: HAPPY BIRTHDAY DARLING!

Sarah 12:07: You’re a dork, Tom. Makes me smile.

Tom 12:09: That’s my job now, darling. :)

Sarah 12:13: You are honestly my favourite person, despite the sad fact that I’ve never seen you before.

Tom 12:14: Well, maybe that could be my birthday present for you.

Sarah 12:17: But I thought we were going to keep this as anonymous as possible?

Tom 12:18: We did, and so we shall. What I am proposing is that I will send you a photo of me without showing my face

Sarah 12:20: That’s a really good idea, and it would prove to my friends that you are a real person.

Tom 12:21: I assure you, darling, I am very real. So what do you say, a photo for the birthday girl?

Sarah 12:28: It sounds lovely. Would you like me to return the favor?

Tom 12:29: Only if you truly want to. Image file

The picture shows a rather tall man standing in front of a full length mirror, the book Any Human Heart covering his face. He is wearing a yellow tee shirt and flannel pajama bottoms. He is quite fit, arms toned as one holds his cell phone up to take the picture while the other keeps the book in place, defined muscles showing despite the shirt covering them. His hair is messy, the colour a mix between blonde and brown.

Sarah 12:35: O_O

Sarah 12:35: You look different than I imagined, you look really good. Not that I was imagining you not looking good, it’s just I wasn’t expecting you to be in such great shape.

Tom 12:37: Thank you, darling. Happy birthday.

Sarah 12:45: Thank you for being so wonderful. Image file

The picture shows a woman in a figure hugging green dress that stops a little below her knees, the fit of the dress showing off her curves. The picture was clearly taken by someone else, as it shows her entire body. She is holding what appears to be a menu of some sort in front of her face, while her other hand rests on her hip. Her legs go on for miles, ending with a pair of golden high heeled shoes. Her hair hangs down below her shoulders in waves of blonde.

Tom 12:48: You look positively stunning, Sarah. Absolutely gorgeous.

Sarah 12:50: I thought you said your job was to make me smile? Because right now all you’re doing is making me blush.

Tom 12:52: Blushing is merely a perk of the job, darling. I must say, I am bewildered by the fact that you are single.

Sarah 1:02: Trust me, if you met me in person you would understand. The way you look there is now way that you are single, is there?

Tom 1:04: There is because I am.

Sarah 1:05: How in hell is that possible? Have you seen you?

Tom 1:07: I’ve dated here and there, but nothing ever seems to last for long. I travel a lot for work and that makes it hard, it seems that most women find the long distance thing a deal breaker.

Sarah 1:28: Sorry my reply took so long. What line of work are you in?

Tom 1:30: Now, now, darling. What happened to keeping this an anonymous thing?

Sarah 1:32: Oh, right. Sorry, I tend to forget things when I drink.

Tom 1:35: How much have you had to drink?

Sarah 1:37: Enough that I don’t give a fuck what I say but not enough to not remember this in the morning

Tom 1:39: Promise me you won’t be driving?

Sarah 1:42: I promise. I didn’t drive here anyway

Tom 1:43: Good. I’m afraid that I am in desperate need of sleep, so this is goodnight. Be safe, Sarah. Happy birthday.

[teacherunicorn]

Opposites Attract (Chapter 81)

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13Chapter 14 Chapter 15  Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18 Chapter 19Chapter 20 Chapter 21 Chapter 22 Chapter 23 Chapter 24  Chapter 25Chapter 26 Chapter 27 Chapter 28 Chapter 29 Chapter 30 Chapter 31Chapter 32 Chapter 33 Chapter 34 Chapter 35 Chapter 36 Chapter 37Chapter 38 Chapter 39 Chapter 40 Chapter 41 Chapter 42 Chapter 43Chapter 44 Chapter 45 Chapter 46 Chapter 48 Chapter 49 Chapter 50Chapter 51 Chapter 52 Chapter 53 Chapter 54 Chapter 55 Chapter 56Chapter 57 Chapter 58 Chapter 59 Chapter 60 Chapter 61 Chapter 62Chapter 63 Chapter 64 Chapter 65 Chapter 66 Chapter 67 Chapter 68Chapter 69 Chapter 70 Chapter 71 Chapter 72 Chapter 73 Chapter 74Chapter 75 Chapter 76 Chapter 77 Chapter 78 Chapter 79 Chapter 80 Chapter 81

Life in the Gotham Narrows was simple; every man for himself. Sure, there were families, friends even, who held a steadfast and die-hard loyalty to each other but the stranger down the street was hardly your problem. Rule number one: look out for number one.

Alyssa had spent her entire life caring and worrying for others, so one would think the shift of focus would be difficult for her. One would be wrong. As soon as the sunset on the city and all the children were in bed one could find her in one of the Narrow’s fighting rings, drinking, making bets, and occasionally fighting herself. Once she crossed that old bridge the rest of the world ceased to exist.

Not that this was a cure all by any means. The quality of her work was beginning to slip. She was short with the older kids and no longer had interest in playing with the younger ones. Selina had more than once found her asleep at her desk with a pen in her hand and papers stuck to her face.

“Mom! Come on, wake up!” the teen shook Alyssa’s shoulder.

“Hmm?” she blinked and yawned. “Oh, hey kitten.” she peeled herself off of her paper work and stretched her arms above her head before reaching for the half-empty whiskey bottle on the corner of the desk.

“Mom, are you okay?”

Alyssa scoffed out a fake laugh. “You know I’m gettin’ really tired of everybody askin’ me that. I’m okay, I’m fine.” she insisted. “I swear, the next person who asks me if I’m okay, I’m punchin’ em.”

Usually Selina Kyle was quite good at masking her emotions and keeping them to herself. Alyssa was her weak spot however, which meant that she was a different story.

“Don’t lie to me!” She snapped.

“I’m not!”

“Yes you are! You’re lying to me, and you’re lying to yourself!”

“Selina Marie Kyle, you have no right to speak to me that way!”

“Mom, I’m worried about you!” Selina’s voice cracked slightly. “Ever since that whole thing with Tetch, you’ve been acting crazy! Something happened that night, and I get that it was hard, but pretending it didn’t happen isn’t gonna help!”

“Oh so you’re worried I’m so out of it I’m about to blow my lid? Who are you and what have you done with my kid?” Alyssa slapped a hand over her mouth.

“Mom..?”

“I’m fine....” Alyssa leaned on the desk for support.

“No, you’re not.” Selina insisted. “You’re running on fumes, and you can’t run forever.”

“You don’t have to worry about me kitten. I’m the mother, worrying is my job.”

Her daughter scoffed. “Mom, could you stop being so high and mighty for once? You’re right, you are my mother. You’re my mother, and I love you, and I wanna help you.”

Alyssa studied the girl’s face, seeing the genuine worry and concern in her eyes. Her sweet baby girl. She recalled the guarded, short tempered child she’d been when they’d met. That was a girl who did not trust the world around her, and with good reason too.

But that girl was no longer here. Gone was the sad little girl who’d been convinced that her mother was still alive. She’d found a new home with a new mother. Sometimes Alyssa envied her daughter; to be able to drop the life you have and exchange it for a better one must be a wonderful luxury.

Then again, Alyssa considered what that meant for her. While the people she cared about could be formidable foes when she was threatened, they’d also had their moments of being foes themselves. Oswald, Edward, even Jerome.

But never Selina.

And it was that steadfast loyalty that managed to turn the screaming in Alyssa’s head to a dull roar, if only for a moment.

She sighed and hung her head, finally allowing the pain she’d been going through these last few weeks to show on her face. “Kid I’m....I’m scraped out.” she admitted. “I mean life keeps throwin’ nothin’ but curve balls at me, and I’ve always been able to....flip myself back over eventually, but....I guess I ran outta times.” she shook her head. “I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised. Jervis always did pack quite the punch.”

“....What happened? That night he took you, Jamie and that Alice chick?”

Alyssa flinched, squeezing her eyes shut. Selina had been kind enough not to say his name, but the tension of it still hung in the air.

‘’Lyssa, we belong together, you know that.’

‘You and I truly are two of a kind my dear.’

‘You don’t have to be scared. I’ll take care of you, I promise.’

‘I won’t let them take you from me again.’

“....Do you remember when you pushed that Archie guy out a window?” she asked, her voice far away. “You were so scared that I’d be mad at you, you tried to sneak past me through the apartment window.”

“I didn’t want you to be upset.” Selina said honestly. She had no idea where this conversation was going but at least Alyssa was finally talking to her.

“You were upset.” she countered. “You said what you did didn’t bother you, but I could tell you were lying. Just....the idea that you were capable of something like that....” Alyssa looked to where a clock hung on the wall to her left, useless now as she had punched the glass face in weeks ago to stop it from ticking. “J- He said I was just like him. That we’re two of a kind, cuz we’re the only ones who know how to...” she was unable to finish, instead tapping her fingers against her skull to get her point across. “...I don’t wanna be like that. Not again.”

*******

*Four years ago*

Having Jervis Tetch back in her life made Alyssa’s visits to Arkham difficult. The trick was, he wasn’t Jervis Tetch anymore. It took some time for her to fully believe it, but the inmate in the top hat truly believed that he was the Mad Hatter from the Alice in Wonderland books. Alyssa had no clue what had happened to him, but whatever it was she wasn’t brave enough to test it too much.

She was subtle, mentioning the name Alice only to get stories of a girl who fell down a rabbit hole. The child he described did sound alarmingly close to his sister, but Alyssa tried to write that off as paranoia. Eventually this paranoia faded as she started to understand just how different the man and the delusion were.

Hatter for instance had no use for technology or tools like Jervis had. He didn’t seem to care if someone wrote him off, simply skipping away to invite the next person he saw to his latest tea party.

Jervis wasn’t like that. When he didn’t get what he wanted things got ugly.

Alyssa knew better than to show weakness around the inmates of Arkham, so she played along with Hatter’s idea that she was the White Queen of his story. In a way it was rather sweet. You couldn’t ask for a better cheerleader than someone who actually believed you were a queen. In fact it wasn’t long before Hatter became one of Alyssa’s favorite inmates. She eventually forgot the history she had with the man he’d be before in favor of having tea with the man he was now.

Still, it was an odd thought to see Hatter with a mischievous smile that somehow held far much more innocence than the one Jervis used to give her.

“Hatter.” she gave him a look as she approached the table in the Arkham cafeteria that held a styrofoam tea set the man had decorated with colors and flowers.

“Your majesty.” Hatter nodded, not tipping his hat as he usually did, both hands held firmly behind his back.

“What have you got behind your back?”

His grin widened as he presented a pristine white paper crown that had a lace design to it. “For you, my queen.” he said as he went down on one knee and held the crown out to her. “I confess it not to be my best work, but resources have been unusually limited in this place.”

“Oh Hatter, it’s lovely.” Alyssa smiled.

“May I?”

“Of course.”

He stood and reached his arms up to position the crown perfectly on her head. As his fingers brushed down her hair, Alyssa recalled a similar white crown he’d made for her out of daises. The memory cast a shadow over the innocent moment and her smile faded.

“Whatever’s the matter, my dear?” he looked at her in concern.

“It’s nothing.” she assured. “I’m alright, Hatter.”

“Then smile.” he cupped her chin, fingers holding her cheek as shivers went down her spine. “It’s coronation day.”

******

For all that Alyssa was doing to pretend Jervis didn’t exist, Jim was doing his best to track the man down. After he had slipped out of GCPD custody, there had been countless reports of people of Gotham’s underworld killing each other, all without motivation. What really unsettled him was that these were all people he knew Alyssa had some kind of connection to. Weather it was a back alley deal or some kind of agreement, they all had ties to the mayor.

If Alyssa was bothered by this, she wasn’t jumping down his throat about it. She wasn’t returning his calls either, and even though Barnes had wanted to put the woman under police protection, she had every right to refuse it -- especially as the mayor.

The whole situation put him on edge. He had come to learn that whenever Alyssa Connors wasn’t actively being a pain in his ass, something was seriously wrong. She had personally seen her sister Jamie along with Alice Tetch to some safe house upstate that she had refused to reveal the location of. He was honestly surprised she hadn’t gone with them; then again he’d never known Alyssa to run and hide in the face of adversary.

His phone ringing interrupted his train of thought. He flipped it open and held it to his ear. “Gordon.”

“Hello James.” a familiar voice said pleasantly. “I’ve heard you’ve been looking for me.”

******

Alyssa turned her head away from Alice, who was crying as her brother put a third needle into her arm. Everyone at the table knew those syringes full of deep red were bad news, and now that Jervis had one for all of his ‘guests’ she was dreading what was coming next.

“You know ‘Lyssa dear, I’ve always wondered what Alice’s blood would do to you.” he admitted. He leaned over her chair, resting his hands over hers, which were bound to the arm rests. “The beast in you is right there. Begging to come out. White queen turned red.” Jervis burst into a fit of giggles, but they faded out when Alyssa refused to look at him.

“Look at me!” his voice lost all of its affection as he tightly gripped her chin and forced her eyes to meet hers. “You’ve spent all these years ignoring who you are, you’ve actually forgotten! You’ve built up this idea, this persona. You think you’re above me, you’re not above me, dear ‘Lyssa, we’re the same!”

“We’re nothing alike.” Alyssa said lowly. “Not anymore.”

“Now you see, that, right there...” he released his bruising grip on her to point in her face. “There’s that illusion. It’s alright, I had it when we were separated too. But we’re finally together again.” he brushed the back of his gloved hand along her cheek, making Alyssa flinch away. “You don’t have to be scared. I’ll take care of you, I promise.”

Alyssa screamed, throwing the glass of wine she had been drinking at the wall. She couldn’t keep going like this. It had taken her ten years to get Jervis out of her head last time, and she wasn’t about to go through that again.

She sighed, rubbing at her temples. She knew this was self-destructive behavior. She’d had enough experience with it to be an expert. She just wasn’t sure she was strong enough to face her demons and be able to win. She had fought too hard already; her amour was full of holes and covered in rust.

Her ringing phone interrupted her medieval musings, and she was tempted to throw it against the wall with the red wine that was currently staining her carpet. But she didn’t do that. Instead, she answered it.

“Hello?”

“’Lyssa darling!”

Alyssa immediately hung up. It didn’t take very long for her phone to ring again. Huffing, she answered it once more. “Yes?”

“Careful my dear, I wouldn’t be so quick to dismiss. If you do, it’s your dear heart’s love down the abyss.”

“What are you rambling about now?”

“I did a little research my dear. To see who had taken my place and become the new Andy; your little arm candy.”

That got her attention. Jervis had been convinced that Andy was coming between them, which had led to him killing him. If she thought she had a new ‘Andy’, whoever he had decided it was was in big trouble. Plus, his rhyming habit was back, which Alyssa knew meant that he was already teetering on the edge.

“Alright, alright, I’m listening. You have my full attention.” She assured, doing her best to keep her voice level.

“Good.” Jervis said pleasantly. “Then you won’t mind joining me for tea. Nothing formal this time, just our usual set up in Arkham.”

“Aren’t you on the run from Arkham? I’d hate to see you locked back in there.”

“Oh ‘Lyssa dear, you underestimate me.” someone screamed in the background of the call, and Alyssa heard several gun shots. “You know, it is remarkable how quickly the police in this town respond nowadays.” Alyssa’s heart dropped to her stomach. “I suggest you hurry, my dear. Between the GCPD and the asylum’s residents, there are quite a few people here that you care about I can hurt.”

[blizzardfluffykpop]

First Child

Summary: You've just conceived your first child and your boyfriend left you what happens now?

Word Count: 2,813

Minghao X Fem! Reader

(Sorry it's so long I had to make it into two parts. It's too long on my phone).

Part I & II

“I did a pregnancy test”

“You what?”

“I'm pregnant.”

“I'm sorry but I just-”

“It's fine I can do this on my own I don't need help I figured the least.”

It's been 3 weeks after that, why I kept the child you ask? My mom always wanted kids and my father wasn't the best to give she was as sad as he was as well to find out he had a very little chance of having kids. My mom was lucky to get me.

I told her first and she begged me to keep it because she doesn't know if I'll be able to have another. She was okay that I was so young well 20 is pretty young if you ask me. She found out pretty soon it was going to be out of wedlock and not have a father figure either. She was okay actually more than okay. She promised me she would help me every step of the way and she's so sweet and endearing.

I worry for her more than she does me because we just lost dad recently and she was really connected to then they were practically soulmates honestly, I can see her dying soon sadly enough but I'm going to enjoy every minute I have with her. I really wish she had me when she was as young as I was, she had me when she was 42 and now, she's 63 and I worry for the woman.

I'm sad that he left me, Min Jooyoung. I really did love him why do you think I gave it up. He's the one who didn't use a condom. I thought he wanted this as well as I did, I suppose not.

------------

Life goes on I as I go to college worrying about how I'm going to study for finals when I have this child. I'm going to have the him I wanted and needed to know the gender. Know yeah, I don't care whatever happens if he wants to be a boy a girl a genderfluid. I'm cool with whatever but hey I'm going to need certain things for the child. For like potty training and things. And I am so not breast feeding after this. There is no way my body is already wanting to kill me my feet are swollen as fuck and no. This boy inside me already I'm not going to. I'll just get my ass formula. Like my tits are aching as well no child.

-----------

Baby proofing everything is hard because you didn't think you would have to put special things on plugs so they aren't pulled out by kids or putting a special lock over the door so they don't run out. Putting little soft things on sharp corners which changed my life I haven't gotten a bad bruise by hitting my thigh on the sharp corners of the table. Honestly everyone should have them it stops people from getting hurt.

---------

My friend, I should say best friend because he's been with me since I was 5 years old as was he. I remember when we were kids and we promised each other to always be with each other when one is in need. And I'm the one in need.

My water broke twenty minutes I was on the toilet peeing beforehand at his house. They said I wouldn't conceive until Monday and it's Friday night. I yelled for Minghao, and he came running up to the door and said, "What you okay?"

"My water broke, and I need help and omg I'm gonna cry." Without further ado he throws open the door I didn't even have the motivation to pull up my well maternity jeans weird but the work quite well. He helps me pull them up and without question he picks me up and rushes me out to his car yanks open the door, carefully puts me on his passenger seat and rushes over to the other side of the car.

That's when I feel the first contraction and I just let the tears rush out of my eyes. And I grasp the arm rests tightly letting out a small whine. He looks over at me and he grabs my hand and gives it a little squeeze as the contraction goes away.

I breath it feels heavy if you ask me. Is he going fast I have no idea it just seems like were in space.

--------

I feel him pull into a parking spot and I'm trying to get the door open as my contraction hits there is no way I am getting out. They're happening about 20 minutes apart now. That's when the door opens and I'm not even able to get out of the car when he picks me up and he's absolutely perfect I hope whoever ends up with him is a really lucky lady.

He speaks in a fast flurry with me in his arms. The next thing I know is I'm on a bed and having a contraction and gripping the poor metal bars on either side of the bed as they stick me with a needle and ask me if I want epidural and I imeditally say yes. He gives me it and he walks out and says he'll be back. Minghao comes over to me and I whisper to him, "I'm scared what if-"

He cuts me off not letting me finish that train of thought and says, "Don't worry about the what ifs. Just go with it. I'm right here. Want me to call your mom?" I forgot that she even existed as I'm going through this. I nod and he picks up his phone and calls her.

I couldn't even make out their conversation because I felt the contraction hits me even worse make that 8 minutes apart now. I looks for something to grasp other than the metal bar and I find his other hand and he lets out a slight pang of pain and I look at him with a look of really. Nothing could possibly beat the pain I'm feeling. He doesn't say anything other than that as he hangs up on the phone and puts it in his back pocket. When I see the doctor come in and I no longer feel much pain, but I know I'm having contractions I can feel them. But not painful it's so odd I guess that medication kicked, or I'm passed out or better, yet I'm numbed.

It turns out I had passed out while conceiving him, but I woke straight up and nearly have Minghao and the nurse in the room a heart attack. Right after the pregnancy. I ask her in a soft tone where is he? And she gives me a slight grin and says, "Your mother is cradling him outside the door want me to bring them in" I nod and look over at Minghao and ask, "Would you like to hold him?"

He's eyes twinkle, he smiles wide at me and gives me a nod. Mom comes in and says, "Sorry, I know you should have held him first but-"

"I understand all I want to know is he healthy?" She nods and gently sets him in my arms, and he reaches out to hold something and I give him my pointer finger and I never thought a child could bring me so much joy with just a little gesture, but it made me smile.

"I know you probably can't understand what I'm saying but I'm your mom. It's a pleasure for me to finally met you in person other than you kicking and tickling my stomach. This is my best friend Minghao he'll hold you in a minute and the person who first held you is my mom and your grandmother."

I miss his little forehead and slowly hand him up to Minghao finding that a lot harder because of the IV in my arm and that took a lot out of my whole body, and it just wants to rest. Even though I have muscles on my arm they feel like deflated gallons is that normal? He grasps him and starts lightly swaying on the balls of his feet.

What am I going to name him I forgot to figure out a name for him I did everything else but that? Well, he'll have my last name of course but what are the possibilities they are endless. I don't want him to have one of those names like people name their kids like after directions or cars or even the first thing they see. Something sweet for him but manly, generous but stern, fighting but soft. Hyun Ki that has a good ring to it. I think it means if I'm correct Wise, Shrewd, Expert, and clever. Maybe I'm missing a few of the meanings but that is the name i want for him. I remember reading that in one of the baby books that teach you about things and said it was less common for people to name them something of wise.

My mom then asks what are you going to name him as I feel a lull of sleep starting to take over me and I quickly tell her, "Hyun Ki" she says something about the meanings of it when sleep takes over me there is no way. Why do I keep falling asleep?

----------

I wake up about twenty minutes later and look over at the two and they're still sitting there, and I ask them about him because he wasn't with us. And they tell me something along the lines of they took him into the Obstetrics wing and if I was feeling well enough I could walk over there with my IV of course. I push myself from the edge and that was a small victory and swing my feet over the edge of that doesn't feel that good. Oh jeez.

The IV is on the other side of the bed, genius... I tell myself when I feel the tension release, I look over to see Minghao pushed it over I gave him a smile. And walk with my hand grasped on that metal. Feeling I have a hospital gown draft great.... good thing they were nice enough to put on they're special underwear it felt nice not to have the bra on if I'm honest. I make my way down the hall, and I see a nurse that was helping me, and I ask her if I can go and she tells me I can and it's down to the left. I keep walking when I hear someone walking fast. I spin not fast enough to make me sick or give me whiplash but fast enough that like body feels like crumbling.

It's Minghao I give him a smile and he gave one back.

------

Before in the room, "Hey Omma" (friends for a long time so they refer to each other’s mom as their own). She looks over and raises a brow, "You know I wish I was the one that was the father of that kid. I would have never let her go."

"It's not like she is married you have a shot and maybe the kid might mess up and call you dad. You never know. I've wanted you two together since you were kids. But when you dated that girl, her heart was broken which led to her to date that guy. She used to love you I'm not sure if she understood the feelings at the time, but I do."

"Do you think she would ever like me?"

"I think so just go get her before someone else does."  I never gotten up faster in my life and I was on my feet and next thing I know I'm in front of her.

--------

He grasps me and helps me walk seeing I was having a little bit of trouble; I sigh in content. Whoever ended up is going to be a really lucky lady.

--------

I remember when my ex-boyfriend and I broke off and I asked Minghao to come over and we ended up getting drunk. We ended up being pretty compromising position when we woke up.

I remember exactly what happened we ended up having sex I have an odd memory that works when I'm drunk and remembers even littlest details. And it wasn't rough like it usually is when your drunk it was soft and passionate. He woke up the next morning and I acted like I didn't remember because he didn't. He was showing no sign of remembering last night. I wish he did because if I was honest, I had wanted him.

And he apologized for whatever happened last night and I did. I took my birth control that morning. So, no, it's not his kids plus that was 3 months before I even showed any sign of being pregnant by taking a test a blood test to be assured.

----------

I see Hyun Ki I think I'll call him hunky as a nickname that'd be cute right? I walk over to him, and he grasps my finger almost imeditally. I grin this is going to be fun.

---------

I took him home a day later once, they were sure I was okay.

Good thing I'm finishing my first year in college and I have 3 left... oh dear. My mom is willing to help me at least.

I get to her house luckily, I had her on Friday am I right? I don't have classes till Tuesday. Minghao comes along with having nothing better to do. This first night is going to be a doozie.

He is sound asleep in my arms and since this isn't the dorm, I don't have everything baby proofed I survived in this house why can't he?

I feed him and change his diaper jee wizz that kid that child smells. I grab the baby wipes, powder, and diaper and go to work on this child. Once, I finish I swaddle him in a little yellow blanket.

He ends up staying over with us to help if he's needed. And oh Lord is he needed, I hear the cries of the kid and I can hardly push myself off the bed. Minor victory again when it goes quiet.

I walk into the room with the crib in it. And see Minghao rocking him, and he already has a new diaper on. Why because he had thor on when I changed him and now it's hulk on the back. And he's singing him back to sleep and slowly puts him back into the crib.

"You know you’re going to be a great father someday?"

"I only know how to do this because I took a class with you. Because someone else had to be present"

"Yeah, I remember those. We were the youngest there and that was terrifying in it of itself."

He lets out a light laugh and we walk quietly out of the room he shuts the door softly, so the click wasn't that loud. He drags me to the couch and we both sit down, and I say, "Thank you."

"I was waiting for it. I couldn't fall asleep-"

"Why not?"

"Thoughts kept me up"

"What kind?"

"Memories of something"

"Vague very vague do you wanna talk about it?"

He shakes his head 'no', "You want some ice cream?" I ask he nods his head 'yes".

I get up and grab to little jars of ice cream and two spoons and sit next to him, handing him his. As he turns on the tv and finds something.

"You know I'm scared, that I'm not going to be a good parent"

"Why's that?"

"I feel that since his father isn't here to raise him, he's going to question me, like 'why did you leave dad' or 'am I not good enough to have a father' or better yet, 'growing up with a mother only isn't right, mom' or what if he won't even call me omma or mom?"

"First of all, if you would have seen from my eyes how sweet you are with Hyun Ki, you would feel and know that you’re going to be a good parent. Don't ever doubt that, and maybe he might ask you about him. Just be honest with him and tell him the truth don't leave him questioning it. It will leave him in a state of confusion okay.  He'll call you mom don't worry about that let the child at least learn words" Trying to cheer me up and it worked, I give him a grin as I eat the ice cream.

"Do you remember that night when you had taken a break from what's it's name and we ended up getting drunk"

[surveysonfleek]

726.

1. What color does your hair look like when it’s wet? black.

2. Do you remember the date of your prom? i didn’t have a date since we weren’t allowed to bring people outside of our school.

3. Was your last kiss long and sensual or short and sweet? Why’s that? short and sweet, it was a goodbye kiss.

4. When kissing, do you like to be on top or bottom? i’m usually on the bottom i think. i don’t know why lol.

5. Do you think your boyfriend really loves you or is he just saying it? he does love me.

6. My boyfriend used to tell me he loved me several times a day..now he doesn’t even say it when I tell him I love him..do you think something is going on? yep.

7. Is it time to clean your cat litter box(assuming you have a cat)? i don’t have a cat.

8. By cat litter box, I mean your vagina? lol it’s clean.

9. Basically, are you clean? ^

10. Why are most surveys made just for girls(with questions about boobs, lipstick, boyfriends, etc)? to be fair most of the survey takers i’ve seen are girls but a lot of the questions are interchangeable with any gender anyway.

11. Oh well, this survey’s for girls, do you wear dark lipstick? i love dark lipstick but for some reason i tend to wear it in winter only.

12. Do you own any red high heels? nope.

13. Can you even walk in high heels? i can but i hate heels in general.

14. Do you have any make-up on right now? no.

15. What are your measurements? no idea, i’ve actually never measured myself properly.

16. Does your boyfriend/husband know what size your boobs are? yes.

17. He should so he can buy you sexy lingerie, right? ;] he has before but not in forever.

18. If you wear glasses, do you have those little disposable lens wipes to clean them with? nope. they’d be handy.

19. Of if you have contacts, are they coloured? i have contacts and no, they’re not coloured.

20. Have you ever fallen asleep with your contacts in and then woke up to them basically sticking to your eyeballs and your vision is all fuzzy? never fallen asleep with them on. too paranoid.

21. Do you have hair extensions or do you think those are strictly for the scene kids? i don’t have extensions and i don’t think they’re for scene kids. scene is dead lol.

22. Am I scene for saying, “kids” in the last question? no.

23. List all the things you have from your boyfriend at your house right now? his cap, socks, clothes even. honestly not many things because i hate it when he leaves his shit here lol.

24. Do you feel uncomfortable when crossing busy streets? not if the pedestrian sign is green. still need to be cautious though.

25. Last time you exercised and for how long? last week for an hour.

26. Have you ever worn guys’ Nike shorts? no.

27. How does your hair look/smell right now? it’s probably dirty but up in a ponytail. smells like hair product.

28. Last girl who called you hot/sexy/something else of the sort? i forgot lol.

29. Was she hitting on you? no.

30. Last guy who called you hot/sexy/something else of the sort? some guy at work randomly called me beautiful. that never happens.

31. Was HE hitting on you? i don’t think so.

32. If you got a pet today, what would you name it? depends on what it is, male/female and personality.

33. Have you ever taken the 5,000 question survey? yes, i think i still have five more sections before i finish it.

34. They say sneezes are like miniature orgasms…do you agree with that? no lol.

35. Do you think a virgin would enjoy getting fondled more than a person who has had sex multiple times? depends on the individual but i think a virgin would enjoy it more as it’s a lead up to sex i guess.

36. Does wearing long sleeve shirts irritate you? i don’t own many tbh.

37. Last nice restaurant you went to? it’s been awhile, haven’t been to anything overly nice in awhile.

38. Who were you with, what did you order, and how much was it? idk.

39. What would you do if your boyfriend/husband got drafted into war tomorrow? i’d be shocked and sad. it’s been nearly a century since people have been drafted to go to war in my country.

40. Does the smell of vinegar make you feel like you’re going to throw up or do you like it? i don’t like it but i’m not repulsed by it either.

41. Do you know anyone who has committed suicide? yes.

42. If you do and you don’t mind me asking, how did they go? they hung themselves.

43. Do you think it’s unladylike for a woman to say, “fuck”? it’s a bit ratchet to near someone saying it excessively no matter what gender you are. it’s fine if you’re just within your group of friends though.

44. Are any of your friends upset about anything right now? not sure.

45. Have you ever attended a high school Homecoming dance and football game? Who was your date? no.

46. When you have a rubber band and you’re around someone, do you feel the urge to pop them with it? no lol.

48. Has a guy ever touched your butt without permission? If so, how did this make you feel? yeah but it was just my boyfriend. i’ve never had a random person do it.

49. How many formal dresses do you own? Sun-dresses? i own way more sun dresses than formal dresses. my closet is full of them.

[jess-rewatches-prodigalson]

Episode 17: Stranger Beside You

SPOILERS and thoughts ahead.

0:13 - How freaking creepy is this? She just pops up from the floor. Did Malcolm not see her there as he was approaching? Why didn’t he acknowledge her presence as he approached? ALSO - he’s excited about muffins? Does that mean muffins are one of the only foods he eats? I find this surprising. ALSO - last episode we learned that Malcolm can’t cook…why does he have a muffin tin? I know this is a dream but still.

0:45 - Ok. Story time. I watched this episode when it premiered. It was the first week I had moved home from university since the whole COVID-19 stuff. My younger brother (20) and my mom (45) who have never seen this show decided to watch it with me. Ugh. Our family dynamic is generally a lot of sarcasm and teasing. I’m the only one in the family interested in crime shows/whump. When Malcolm said “This is when the scary thing usually happens.” both of my family members started cackling like buffoons. For the next week my brother quoted that line to me. They both now tease me for loving this show so much…so that happened.

1:18 - This is kind of sweet. I don’t like Eve but I like seeing Malcolm this happy.

1:56 - This is such a good sibling conversation. Ainsley is setting Malcolm straight. I know Malcolm is right but honestly - Ainsley has a point. Malcolm has a tendency to accidentally sabotage his own relationships because he can’t trust people and he doesn’t believe that he’s worthy of love.

3:15 - Look at this. Just. Look. JT is happy to see Malcolm. They’re bantering like brothers. This relationship has blossomed and I’m so happy…also I google “sip and see” because I really wanted them to be fake. They sound ridiculous, but they’re real. IDK. I don’t have kids but it seems crazy to organize a big fancy party right after you give birth. Invite friends and family over - sure. Order a pizza and a cake. But hang out in something comfy and keep it casual. Maybe that’s just me. IDK.

3:42 - Malcolm’s projecting again. “Perfect can be an allusion.” Honestly. Is he even aware that he does this?! Also, is he projecting about his childhood or his relationship with Eve. Either way, I’m concerned for him….though I do like how happy he’s looking right now.

3:47 - hahaha OMG. “With the stiff!” Gil is so done.

4:30 - I thought this was interesting. 1) Do dead bodies actually do that? Compress? Huh. Cool. 2) I like the way that Edrisa and Malcolm are so totally absorbed in how cool/weird the cause of death was that neither of them notice Edrisa’s hand on Malcolm’s chest. 3) Gil pointing out Edrisa’s hand makes things a little awkward - but honestly I see it as a gentle warning. He knows that Edrisa is socially awkward. She’s not in trouble and he’s not mad. He’s just reminding her that stuff like that isn’t appropriate.

5:04 - Watching this after realizing that Tally is pregnant brings a whole new weight to all of JT’s comments. Every time he mentions babies, baby swag, moms - he looks either scared, stressed (because money), or excited. It’s freaking precious.

6:15 - “It’s a cloud of love. Nothing to be ashamed of.” Again. More proof that Malcolm is an A+ adult male. Who speaks like that?

7:05 - Do I need to be scared about Dani now too? I do not like the way that Martin says her name. Wait. Is Martin going to go after every person that takes Malcolm’s time away from visiting him? I can totally see it. Martin escaping - killing Gil for replacing him as Malcolm’s Dad. Killing Jessica for trying to keep Malcolm from him. Killing JT, Dani, and Edrisa for being his friends. Can’t decide if he’d kill Ainsley…

7:41 - HOW is this show so dark and yet so funny?!?!

8:20 - I know that Malcolm knows that Tally is pregnant…but after the pizza roll comment there’s no way Gil and Dani don’t suspect. Look at their faces!!! And the way JT looks down way too quickly. He’s clearly hiding something.

8:55 - Look at Gil’s face. He’s concerned and a little scared. I am too. What the hell does Malcolm mean by “Mom’s love me”?!?! Is this some weird sex thing?

9:05 - Dani is a queen. We stan. She is the friend Malcolm deserves. I especially love the fact that later we find out that she told JT about this conversation. As though she thought Malcolm needed “guy advice”.

10:00 - Yo. People like this shouldn’t be allowed to have children. Kids are not a fashion statement - they are human beings who need to be nurtured and loved.

11:10 - So, I don’t usually like it when Ainsley snoops around for a story and gets all determined - but this time I do.

12:00 -  Does Ainsley really not understand that what she did was a total invasion of privacy?!? She doesn’t look sorry. At all. The fact that Ainsley actually talks to Eve about it is kind of awful too? Like it’s one thing to do a background check on someone - it’s another thing to talk to them, unprovoked, about what you found. 

12:12 - Poor Jessica. She looks upset. Between her two “socially bizarre” children ( lol ) she really has a hard time making friends. Although…..I will admit. It’s a little weird that Jessica is making friends with a woman young enough to date her son. 

 12:32 - Soooo this means that Malcolm has an instagram account (at least a fake one for work anyways). I feel like Malcolm is one of the people who don’t have a personal instagram account. Because a) he has like 3 friends and b) he doesn’t strike me as the type of person to take pictures of food, people, events, or himself. 

 12:40 - So Malcolm’s sitting at that desk again…..forget about the gitb… I want to solve the desk mystery (and the mystery of JT’s name). 

12:57 - Damn it JT! We were about to get a super awesome father/son moment. Ugh. When I said I wanted the writers to give JT more screen time I didn’t mean this. 

13:13 - Aww…look at how proud Dani is of herself. Girl made a cool discovery and she’s proud/excited about it. <3 

13:22 - ARE YOU KIDDING ME. We finally get a good look at the desk from the front. No name plate in view?!? UGH. This is killing me. 

13:33 - hahaha look at these faces! JT looks confused/freaked out that Malcolm knows so much about babies feeding habits. Dani looks so annoyed that she’s been put on Malcolm babysitting duty again. I don’t blame her. Gil is always making her babysit Malcolm. JT never has to take a turn. 

 13:55 - The most annoying thing about this episode is that we never find out how Alessa cut her arm. It’s a weird place on your arm to get a cut and I’m curious about it. 

 14:35 - I respect Malcolm a LOT in this scene. He’s asking some tough (but necessary) questions. He’s calm, kind, and respectful. He’s not minimizing Alessa’s stress, her loss, or her devotion to her daughter.

16:30 - Soooo if Christine’s (ex) husband lives in Canada - does that mean he’s Canadian (or dual citizen)? Or does he just have a work permit? I’m curious about what that means for Christine’s citizen status. I find this odd though - even if Christine isn’t Canadian - if she was last seen in Canada and her husband reported her missing - the RCMP would’ve been looking for her. They NYPD would know that. Although - she is using a fake name. Huh. There’s a reason I’m not in law enforcement. People are too crafty. I’ll stick to math. 

 17:55 - Look how mad JT looks that Christine tried to abduct Nina….he’s going to be such an overprotective, good dad. <3 

18:25 - This is a really cool moment. This scene is the first since 1x9 when JT and Malcolm have a heart-to-heart. JT also gives Malcolm some really good relationship advice. Damn. No wonder JT’s been married for 7 years. He gets it. 

 18:55 - I love how manic Malcolm looks and how concerned JT looks when Malcolm goes off on his little rant about being a suspicious person. I wonder if JT is wondering why Malcolm trusts Gil, Dani, Edrisa, and himself? They are, by all means, good things in Malcolm’s life. Is he suspicious of them? 

19:25 - Does Martin know about Malcolm’s sensitive stomach? I’m really curious. 

 19:44 - This scene is awesome. Malcolm is sad, upset, a little anxious, and angry (at Martin) throughout the scene. Martin, even though he is a crazy serial killer, actually gives Malcolm some good relationship advice. I guess it makes sense. Martin could never have tricked Jessica into marrying him unless he acted like a perfect, good dude with good relationship skills. 

20:04 - Martin actually believes he was a perfect father? Nope. I can’t. Any parent who genuinely believes that should have a psych eval. No one is perfect. Parents aren’t excluded from this rule. 

 20:56 - This is such a powerful moment. You can see how pleased Martin is because he got through the Malcolm. You can see how desperately Malcolm wants to love his father and how painfully aware Malcolm is of who his father is and how much he despises it. Malcolm shouldn’t have to remind himself to hate his father. No one should. Watching Malcolm grapple with that (through his facial expressions) is heart-wrenching. He actually looks close to tears for a moment. ALSO screw Martin for still trying to manipulate Malcolm into loving him. 

 22:10 - I’ll just say it. We’re all thinking it anyways. Malcolm’s soft voice when he’s confused is so freaking cute. 

23:08 - Look at JT’s face during this scene. He just about had a freaking heart attack. I feel soooo bad for him. I can only imagine how bad he feels. Gil gave him one (1) job: protect the baby. JT’s probably thinking, “If I can’t even protect this stranger’s baby - how will I ever protect my baby? Will I be a bad father?” Someone give this man a hug for me.

23:25 - Look at the way JT touches the infant to make sure she’s real. That is a man who is on the verge of a panic attack. 

 24:00 - AND now JT is worrying about Tally’s health throughout her impending pregnancy. Good Lord. What a rollercoaster he’s on tonight.

25:25 - Concerned!Gil for the win! Gil hasn’t been around Malcolm much this episode. Yes - Malcolm is obviously upset right now, but it makes me wonder if Jessica and/or Ainsley have called Gil because they’re concerned about Malcolm right now. Did they call Gil and ask him to send Malcolm home? 

 26:25 - Look at that. Malcolm looks crushed. Not surprised just disappointed. He truly believes that he’s not worthy of love. Eve just confirmed it for him. I honestly don’t know how this dude will ever trust any romantic partner ever again. My heart is shattered. 

26:43 - Look at how brave he’s being. He’s trying to mask his pain with a smile and a self-deprecating joke as usual. Problem is - his eyes look tortured and he’s trying to lie to the two women who know him best. They see through his mask and they’re concerned for him. 

27:00 - Ainsley is such a strange character to me. Right now as she tells Malcolm about Eve, she is looking at Malcolm with dread, concern, and determination. In 1x7/1x10 she publicly embarrassed him and revealed his personal, private details with the world - without remorse. I know that Ainsley is really obsessed with the progression of her career. However, it shouldn’t blind her to the emotions of her big brother. Ainsley needs therapy. 

 27:08 - soooo Eve has a key to Malcolm’s place? After two(ish) weeks? For a dude who doesn’t trust easily this seems like a stretch. I’m choosing to believe that Malcolm left the door open when he saw Ainsley and Jessica. 

 27:15 - THIS is so important. Jessica’s “How could you?”. See her face? She’s devastated. The first female friend she’s had in probably 20 years just stabbed her in the back. To make matters worse, this woman also just broke the heart of Jessica’s very emotionally vulnerable son - thereby also breaking Jessica’s heart. Furthermore - Jessica is definitely already paying rent in the self-loathing hotel because she traumatized her children because she married a serial killer. NOW she’s also dealing with the guilt of knowing that she’s the one who brought Eve into Malcolm’s life. That look hurt or devastation on Jessica’s face which later transforms into rage and hatred is haunting. Props to Bellamy Young. 

27:26 - This. Look at Malcolm’s face. Eve looks like she’s close to tears. Malcolm is looking at her with compassion. Yes - you can tell that Malcolm is devastated and hurt by Eve. However, he also clearly empathizes with her. Again. Malcolm. Bright. Is. An. A+. Dude. Fight me.

27:40 - Can we all just pause for a second and praise Tom Payne’s acting in this scene? He captured the raw emotion of a trauma induced panic attack perfectly. Look at how utterly broken Malcolm is. Hands shaking on his head. Tears in his eyes. Ragged breathing. Followed by a brief angry outburst which leads to more shaky, anxious breathing and eyes on the verge of tears. The end result is physical and emotional exhaustion. 

 27:45 - Ainsley looks shocked and a little scared by Malcolm’s outburst. Has she (HIS SISTER) never seen him have a panic attack? They grew up together. I refuse to believe it. Ainsley shouldn’t look shocked - she should look sad and resigned to it. 

 28:06 - This is heartbreaking. Malcolm genuinely thinks that there is something about him that makes him unlovable. I know he’s already in therapy - but they need to stop focusing on his trauma for a hot second and focus on his self-worth issues. I aM nOt OkAy. 

 28:22 - Can we all just take a minute to appreciate Dani Powell. She has been such a good friend to Malcolm. Probably the first true friend Malcolm’s had since he was 10 years old. Even in the midst of extreme emotional turmoil a work-related text from Dani makes Malcolm smile. Because Malcolm knows that Dani  - a woman who isn’t related to him and has no obvious crush on him - doesn’t hate him. In fact - she likes him enough to be his friend. Right now that’s enough. That’s a big comfort to Malcolm. 

 28:36 - This is sheer panic on Jessica’s part. Check out those eyes. She just saw pure self-loathing and anger in her son’s eyes. She’s terrified for him. Maybe this look is reminding her of a look he got as a teenager when he became suicidal (it’s my headcanon that Malcolm had a period of active suicidal ideation as a teenager)? 

 28:40 - “I can’t solve this.” Is Malcolm referring to himself here? I mean - he clearly thinks that he is the problem; despite the fact that Eve came into his family’s life with the intention of getting information on his serial killing father. Ugh. His sad eyes and messy hair (that tends to indicate Malcolm is in severe emotional distress) is breaking my heart. 

 28:54 - Ok. So - who is this woman? How did Christine find her? Why did Christine go to her? It doesn’t look like a women’s shelter - it looks like a random lady’s residential home. 

 29:00 - Again. Let’s all praise Queen Dani. The bestest friend this dude has ever had.  She just goes out and asks him what’s wrong. She’s concerned about him BECAUSE she knows he’s upset about something.

29:20 - I love that Malcolm is comfortable enough around Dani to be honest with her about the really hard stuff in his life. Look at how sad Malcolm looks here. Look at Dani’s reaction. She isn’t judging him or pitying him. She isn’t pushing him to talk. She’s just supporting him. She’s a little shocked, a lot upset on his behalf, but mostly she’s just concerned. She’s being a good friend and I love her for it. 

 29:36 - Lucas is a scum. Anyone who abuses a spouse, child, or family member has a special spot reserved in hell. 

 29:52 - Look at Dani as Christine tells her story. She’s sympathetic, respectful, and concerned. Either this isn’t the first time Dani’s been around a battered woman on the job or Dani has personal experience with abuse. Maybe a friend/family member was abused? Hell - maybe Dani had an abusive boyfriend or something? 

30:20 - I really respect Malcolm in this scene. He knows that women who are fresh out of an abusive relationship (or still in one) with a male are weary of men. Usually, when Malcolm gets this type of information about a case he starts speaking quickly, loudly, and intensely. He starts gesturing a lot with his hands. IN THIS SCENE - Malcolm reigns himself in. He stays relatively calm and still as he speaks. He knows that his usual hand-gesturing and loud voice would terrify a woman who was just beaten by a man who was supposed to love her. This. Is. A. Good. Dude.

31:10 - Malcolm just shows Dani his cracked phone screen. I’m curious - does she ever ask about it? I’d like to hear that conversation. 

33:05 - I LOVE THIS. Gil is terrified for a) Malcolm but b) Alessa and Nina too. This is a side of Gil I’d like to see more often. ALSO notice that the second that JT realizes that Gil is suffering from a parental panic attack he floors it. JT is going to be a good Dad. <3 He knows how to love and he has a big heart. That’s the most important thing. 

 34:34 - Again. Malcolm is currently displaying empathy and sympathy for a murderer. This dude has the biggest heart in the world. 

35:45 - Alessa is a badass. Nina is a lucky little girl. 

36:04 - I love this scene. Gil looks so relieved that Malcolm is in one (mostly unharmed) piece. He’s so proud of Malcolm for keeping Alessa and Nina safe. I’m certain that Jessica and/or Ainsley called Gil about Malcolm’s panic attack which exacerbated Gil’s worry over Malcolm.

37:07 - THE SCENE. The scene. This scene is easily my favourite of the episode. I love watching JT and Malcolm’s friendship in real time. Look right here this is two guys chatting about how cool someone is. <3 Look at how happy and proud JT is of a woman he just met. I promise you he’s thinking about how awesome and badass of a mother his wife is going to be. 

 37:28 - JT’s scared face coupled with his softly spoken “Dude.” stops my heart. It’s as though talking to someone other than his wife makes the baby seem like more of a scary, real responsibility. You can tell that he’s excited but still terrified about fatherhood. He’s not quite ready to tell people yet. 

37:37 - “The thing’s the size of a peanut.” - I googled it: Tally is about 9 weeks pregnant. ALSO how freaking cute is it that JT is so excited about his unborn child that he knows how big it is. <3 I can just see him panic researching about pregnancy and caring for infants in the middle of the night while Tally sleeps. <3 

 37:44 - He doesn’t want to jinx it? Does that mean he and Tally have had trouble getting pregnant in the past? Miscarriages? Infertility? Or is JT just scared from everything he’s been researching about pregnancy? Either way - if Tally looses this child I will riot. 

37:50 - “You don’t do happy.” - Malcolm’s face twists into a look of hurt and sadness. He genuinely believes JT’s words - even though JT meant them as a joke. JT sees that too because he immediately starts teasing Bright. JT is concerned about Malcolm. 

38:39 - So Eve does have a key. Nope. Not cool. Not in-line with Malcolm’s trust issues. I refuse to believe it. 

 39:11 - I hate watching Malcolm be this sad. Look at his nose. It’s just a little red - he’s been crying. His fragile ability to trust has been shattered again and Eve’s apology is quite honestly not very good. 

39:45 - Can we all just pause on Malcolm’s shirt? It looks like the orange sweater Gil wore in 1x13. Did they go shopping together? Did Malcolm buy the shirt because it reminded him of Gil? Does he only wear it when he feels sad because the fact that it reminds him of Gil comforts him

40:35 - What’s the story of Eve’s Dad? What’s his deal? 

41:40 - I’m really proud of Malcolm for being brave enough to face the truth and have this really difficult conversation with Eve. 

43:09 - Ok. I’ll say it. Malcolm is too nice. This woman shattered his heart last night and now he’s hugging her? Bro - you don’t have to do that. You’re allowed to be upset. You’re letting her walk all over you. 

Thanks for hanging out Prodigies.