#this whole scene being so book accurate kills me

[theodeckrs]

some of you moved on from this way too quickly. i, however, DID FUCKING NOT!!!

[ebsmind]

My Little Treasure | president!Nico Hischier x fem!reader

summary : being the presidents mistress isn’t easy. even when another woman comes out saying she’s having an affair with him.

word count : 8.5k (the longest ive ever written BE PROUD OF ME)

warning(s) : this is purely based off of shonda rhimes SCANDAL sjiwiejdj, angst, longing (kinda? idk), cheating/infidelity (nellie deserves better), reader pushes her feeling aside, timo being called nico’s personal bitch AHAHAHA, murder (mentioned in case), non accurate descriptions of politics and law stuff, like 2-3 mentions of vomit , use of Y/N (I tried not too but I just couldn't), tbh there’s not a lot of nico x reader IM SORRY part 2 will make up for it, heavy makeout session, smut kinda? idk but next part will be smutty TRUST, getting caught by timo (what the hell Timo), VIOLENCE aka just a slap in the face, one flashback spicy scene and i think that's it!

a/n : LISTEN LISTEN before i say ANYTHING i just wanted to say that i know nico isn’t american but im currently hyper fixated on him and only him and i just started watching scandal again SO I HAD TO so please if you don’t like the “accuracy” don’t read it! this is FICTIONAL but yeah here we are! this closely follows the first episode from season 1! this is a long oneeeee! i’ve also changed the names of Abby, Quinn, Harrison, Huck, AND Cyrus (you’ll see who I change him with 😏) I also go along with the case that’s happening so this is semi like a mystery but not? idk how to explain but you’ll see as you read. send me something in my inbox if you want me to elaborate on anything about the side characters! i definitely want to turn this into an au so send me something so i can write about it or talk about it! here’s the mood board! this is also my second time writing anything spicy so please bear with me, this whole fic idea really had me out of my comfort zone so it isn't my best writing but I still wanted to get this out!

The clicks of your So Kate’s are heard throughout the law firm. Everyone knows it’s you, just by the way you walk. It’s swift and carries determination, you are on a mission. You present yourself with a sense of purpose to your colleagues. Scratch that, they’re family. Despite them technically being your coworkers, you would do anything for the four of them. From saving Gwen from her violent ex-husband to Kurt, a soldier who had served in the United States CIA’s top secret, off the books, B-613 program who ended up being dumped on the streets to beg for food, you saved them and they were all you had. 

You step into the standard-sized conference room, and the extensive window along the back wall displays an orange-to-blue hue. The sun is setting and making it known that the end of the day is near. You first make eye contact with Blair, the senior associate at the firm. She stops her conversation amongst everyone and before she can greet you, Kurt, who is sitting at the very right end of the table, utters, “Perla Schmitz killed herself, channel 5.” 

You make no time to strut to the table and grab the TV remote, which had been sitting next to Blair. You don’t need to change the channel once you press the power button on the remote, it’s all you watch in the firm—across the 55’ inch screen, displayed in bold lettering ‘Perla Schmitz (26) found dead in her home’. You take a second to yourself. Perla had been caught cheating on her husband, who was a very conservative congressman, but that wasn’t the icing on the cake. The guy she was having an affair with? He murdered her husband, brutally. 27 stab wounds to the chest, his head almost decapitated because of how much force was used to slit his throat. If someone were to ask you, you’d say she had it coming. 

You turn to the group and raise a finger in the air as you start to speak. “We knew this was coming, let’s not pretend that she wasn’t the one cheating on her husband.” 

Perla came into your office late last Friday night, around 11:25. You had stayed longer than you originally wanted to, needing to finish up some paperwork that had to be done for one of the previous clients you had. What a way to bring in the new year, but you weren’t complaining. 

“Exactly! I knew she didn’t have enough willpower to continue her life. She took the easy way out, man.” You take a seat at the left end side of the table, parallel to Kurt while Neil, another associate and close friend of yours finishes his veracious remark. You decide it’s best to tell Neil and everyone else to drop the topic, but before you can open your mouth, the firm doors open. The 7-foot ebony-colored wood doors reveal a man with black hair and blue eyes, maybe mid to late 20s. The first thing you notice is how his eyes tear up before he speaks, not how he’s covered in blood. 

“I-…I didn’t kill her I swear! She was my best friend, we were gonna get married!” 

Your irises scan over the pinned evidence on the whiteboard, it had been approximately 18 hours since the 6’2 blood blood-covered man had walked into your firm. Sully St. James comes from an extremely well-respected family. His father was a Veteran from the Vietnam War. Sully himself had done two tours in Iraq and received the Medal of Honor. Having someone as well respected as him, show up to the front door of your firm, asking for help wasn’t new but you were determined to help the man not get convicted as the killer in his girlfriend’s murder case. You needed time, but the US attorney general David Rosen was stubborn. 

“Okay! So, according to Sully, he had just come home from the bar down on 9th St, called SOST, he then walked into the bathroom where the crime scene is, saw Paige’s body on the ground,” Blair points out and before she can finish her sentence Kurt cuts her off. 

“Paige suffered from 2 bullets to the chest and 1 to the head. This wasn’t a freak accident, someone wanted her dead.” Kurt crosses his arms and moves up from the far end of the table. He was correct, but your gut couldn’t help but wail that Sully was not the cause. 

Blair continues to explain the approximate details, “Here’s the weird part, Sully calls the police but before they can get there he flies, and he flies here.” She takes a step away from the whiteboard and makes eye contact with you. She can sense what you’re already going to say. Blair knows you, and she knows you like the back of her hand. 

“My gut tells me that he didn’t do this. Something is missing. I need more, all of you need to try to find something, anything! Anything that can clear this man’s alibi. He said it himself that he loved her and that she was his best friend. I believe him.” You step up from the chair you were sitting in and start heading towards the conference room doors when your cell phone starts to ring. Grabbing it out of your left pocket, the name “Timo Meier” is displayed across the screen. You huff in response. 

He needs you right now and you know if Timo were to tell you to head to the White House as soon as possible you would and it wouldn’t end in a way you would like. Yet, you still manage to press the green button, confirming the call. 

“What do you want.” You’re busy and Timo knows it. This isn’t some ‘Oh hi! How are you doing? I haven’t heard from you in a while phone call. Timo didn’t have time for that, being the White House’s Chief of Staff to Nico Hischiers personal bitch, he never had time.

Timo sighs, you can already picture him, sitting at his desk, elbow resting on it, his thumb and pointer finger trying to relieve his throbbing headache. Timo did so much for the President of the United States and somehow that included calling you on a random Tuesday afternoon. 

“He needs you to come in. Something happened and we need you to make it go away.” Timo lets you take a second to respond. Already sensing that the situation was substandard, it had been months since you had last spoken to Timo and maybe even half a year since you’ve seen Nico. Physically. It wasn’t that you hated him, you could never. It was the fact you left your position as the White House Communications Director for yourself. Everything you did was always for Nico and never not you and when the realization of that hit you, it was time to go. It’s time to separate yourself from some fantasy that only ever works out in the books. The feeling of two hands wrapped around your throat finally caught up to you. 

“I’ve got a client sitting in my conference room Timo.” 

“Look, I know, I know, but this isn’t something that needs to be out in the public. Make it go away. Please. If not for him, for me.” He’s desperate and you know it. If you were to tell him that the only reason you were about to agree was because you held him in such high regard, you’d never hear the end of it. So, you keep your reply as simple as needed. 

“Okay, I’ll be there in 45 minutes. I need to let Neil know.” 

You spot Timo before he spots you. He’s sat on a bench, perhaps getting some proper vitamin D. You watch the way his foot taps every other millisecond. Being cooped up in a mediocre-sized office in the White House can make someone feel insane, you’ve been there. 

As you get closer, you examine the navy blue suit that he’s dressed in. It’s his favorite one, he has 3 more pairs of it because he wears it so much. His tie has gold accents on it, it’s from his wife. You had helped her pick it out for him since you had seen him a lot more than she did. His eyes are heavy, he’s needs a vacation, a long one to be exact. You’ll let Nico know if you ever see him again, maybe he can pull some strings for him even if it’s a nice (long-awaited) expensive dinner.

You walk up the concrete steps before reaching Timo, the only thing grabbing his attention is the click of your heels. Once he realizes that you have walked up to him, you open your mouth to greet him. 

“What.” Timo giggles, he’s knows you mean business but he can’t deny he misses your presence around in the White House even if you were telling him off half of the time. 

“Well, hello to you too.” He stands up and gestures to start walking with him. You obey and within a second you guys stride across the walkway that overlooks the White House. 

“What do you need me for Timo? I don’t work for him anymore.” 

“He needs a favor.” You scoff at Timo and choose not to say anything.

“You still came. You came when I called.” His words hit you like a bus. It stings. Both you and Timo know that whenever the President needs anything from you, you’ll be there in a heartbeat. You’d do anything for everyone you love. You were loyal. That’s how it always had been and why Nico wanted you there every step of the way. He knew that he could turn his back and not expect a knife to be plunged into it. 

“Her name is Vanessa Wyatt. She works in AIDE. She claims to have had an affair with him. I need you to make it go away and fast.” Timo places his right arm on his abdomen, in response you hook your left one into his right and walk side by side with Timo. 

“Is it true?” You try to show no reaction but green envy begins to boil in your stomach.

“No, of course not, but I need you to shut it down.” 

“I need to see him.” You don’t think about your reply until after it leaves your mouth. Both you and Timo come to an abrupt stop. He takes a step back and faces you. 

“No, I don’t think that’s possible.” 

“You want me to shut her up? Then I need to look at him in the eyes and know he’s not lying.” Timo knows that you're serious. You always are. 

“The President’s schedule is packed. He has no time to see you.” He’s straightforward, Timo doesn’t have time for negotiating but luckily for you, you’re a persuasive person. You tend to always get what you want even if it means overstepping some boundaries. 

“He wants my services but here’s the thing Timo, I do not work for him anymore! So, tell him to make time to see me if not you’re just gonna have to find someone else to do it for you. You know where to find me.” 

After giving Timo a faint smile, you turn to walk away. As one foot goes in front of the other, you can’t help but feel that some part of this story is true making your heart ache.

By the time you get back to your office, you get a phone call from Timo, confirming that Nico managed to get out of a meeting so that he could talk to you. With that, you grab your coat off the coat rack and start heading towards the conference room to let at least Gwen know about your abrupt departure. 

“Hey Gwen, duty calls at the White House, I’ll be back in a couple of hours. Anything new?” Gwen knows you’re talking about the case and before she utters anything new she’s found, she strides to the door and closes it. 

Knowing that Sully is just in the room next door, she lowers her voice, “Kurt managed to get into Paige’s email and I’ve been reading. I found one where she emailed a friend. She was supposed to meet up with a friend at the embassy party together but never showed.” 

You nod your head to show that you understand but it’s not enough information to be able to explain why Paige was murdered so, you request more information. 

“Who? and Why?” Keep it simple. 

Gwen takes about a second before she replies, “A girl named Ariel, and I don’t know why.” 

“Find out why. ‘I don’t know’ is not an answer I’m gonna take.” That sentence leaves your mouth as fast as lightning strikes the Earth’s outermost crust. 

To other people, your reply would’ve been seen as impolite but to you and everyone at the firm, it was just that ‘I don’t know’ wouldn’t get you anywhere in a case. Especially when so much is at stake.

“I won’t be long Gwen. Tell Blair and she’ll go interview the friend.”

Once you arrive at the White House you are led to Timo’s office. It’s nice and spacious, with a window that overlooks a garden. Nellie’s garden. A sour taste forms in your mouth. The garden is small, not as big as Jacqueline Kennedy’s garden but Nellie insisted she needed her own. You were told moments ago that she’d be attending this “meeting” and as much as you dislike it, you can’t help but feel empathy for Nellie. She was nothing but nice to you when Nico hired you as the manager for his campaign. It sucked most that you went not even a month later you started sleeping with her husband. 

The combined noises of clothes rustling and heavy breaths consume the aura of the small hotel room. It’s unbelievable how an innocent dinner between two ‘colleagues’ can turn outright sexual within two hours, but you weren’t complaining. Maybe it was the two glasses of cabernet sauvignon that your unconscious level of operation had convinced you to drink. 

Nico places open-mouthed kisses from behind your ear, down to the spot on your breast that the black lace push-up bra doesn’t cover. The white ironed shirt, that had been covering your bra, had been tossed over your head about 15 minutes ago and the black midi skirt was currently being tugged down your hips. As for Nico, all to go was the baby blue dress shirt he wore, and the black tie. Which had been taken off right when the two of you entered the room. His dark navy blue pants remained on the list of clothes that needed to be discarded.  

You take a second to admire Nico’s disheveled hair. The thought of pulling it with your fingers when he whispers sweet nothing’s into your core flashes across your mind. Nico cuts off that thought once his lips make contact with yours. It’s messy and filled with need. The months of longing stares, mainly from him, were finally catching up. You take notice that your black skirt is now pooled at your feet. You take a step out of them, in a haze, the action bringing you closer to Nico. He steadies you by placing his hands on your hips. His fingertips graze the matching black lace panties you paired with your bra. He smirks into the kiss at the thought of you planning it out. 

Nico takes small steps, notifying you to do the same but backward, and guides you to the small light wooden desk against the wall opposite of the bed. The back of your thighs hit the desk and with a swift motion, Nico grabs you at the waist and sets you to sit on top of it. A quick gasp escapes your naturally pouty lips and with that, Nico gets on his knees. 

Timo snaps you out of that thought fairly quickly, “Well hello, long time no see!”

He’s being sarcastic, but you waste no time to get to the point. 

“I was told Nellie was going to be here. She knows about this?”

Timo nods, acknowledging your words, and replies, “It’s not like how it was during the election. The isolation of the White House bonded them, their marriage is as strong as ever.” 

Before you can react to Timos statement, Nellie comes barging into the room. 

“Y/N!” 

You fake a smile, deep down you could never hate Nellie. No matter how hard you try. “Nellie, hi! How are you doing?!” Faking your enthusiastic response, you can’t help but feel guilty. It wasn’t hard to read Nellie, so you could tell she missed your presence around in the White House. Once Nellie reaches you she engulfs you in a heartwarming hug. She rubs your back and soaks in the moment, reminiscing an old friendship.

You’re the first to step away and once you create a small fragment of distance, Nellie answers your question.

“I’m doing well! It’s taking some time getting used to you not being here but I’m managing. How’s the firm?”

“We’re doing well over there. It’s been busy but I like being occupied…can never get enough of it.” You chuckle at the tiny comment you make and Nellie goes to carry the conversation but comes to a halt when the double doors to Timo’s office open once again. 

You told yourself, on the drive over to the White House, that you would keep things strictly professional but Nico always managed to make that very hard. Not only that, you still deeply cared for the man and he did the same as well. But the moment you saw his face everything you had prepared yourself for had expeditiously faded away. You can’t even process the moment, that he’s here and physically in front of you until he’s shaking your hand. 

The last time you saw Nico was at a charity gala in late June. Five months after you left. You only managed to stay for an hour until everything felt overwhelming. Your chest felt like it was being compressed by an unseen entity, and bile was rising in your throat. Nico had tried his best to talk to you but with Nellie by his side and her pregnancy rumors, he couldn’t. It broke his heart when he saw the tears in your eyes. You’d felt betrayed but also knew that being the President’s mistress meant that you never came first. Even if he lied to you and said that you did. 

“Y/N, It’s good to see you.” He’s keeping it simple. He can’t show too much vulnerability, there are still two people in the room. 

“Likewise, Mr. President.” You drop your hand first from the handshake and look closely at Nico. He shaved two days ago, you can tell by the stubble sitting on the lower half of his face. It has just grown enough to the point where if he could get on his knees in front of you, you’d feel it scratch your inner thighs. 

“Shall we take a walk?” Timo kindly suggests. 

The three of you decide to chat in Jacqueline Kennedy Garden. With the company of two secret service members but you don’t mind. 

It may be January but the pansies are still in season. You walk up and admire the some that are purple. You notice that in the outer part of the petal, they’re royal purple, but towards the center, they’re light purple - almost a lilac color. That would be a nice color for a wedding. You’re too busy admiring the flowers that don’t notice the sound of footsteps approaching until the person has already reached you. It’s Nico. You don’t even need to look to know it’s him. He clears his throat before starting the conversation with you. 

“I know you have your hands full with the Sully St. James situation so, thank you for doing this, for me.” He turns to look at you. God you’ve missed him. 

Timo walks up behind you and the president, the two secret service agents aren’t too far behind. He pulls out a beige file folder and speaks. 

“Her name is Vanessa Wyatt.” You take hold of the folder and open it up. 

“I know.” 

“Well if you let me finish- anyways, she’s 25. I’ve heard rumors that she might be talking.” Timo states and looks off into the distance. It’s nice and sunny outside, but not even for it to take the edge off the cold. You take a look at what she looks like. She must be new, or at least got hired after you resigned. She’s cute but looking at her makes you feel nauseated. You push that feeling aside, it’s best at what you do. 

“But you can’t fire her. At least not without a shit show going off.” Both Timo and Nico nod. Nico has yet to say anything. You find it odd but push that thought aside. You know Nico wouldn’t do this. 

“Look, she hasn’t gone to the press, so best shut it down before she opens her mouth.” Timo’s phone rings and he excuses himself to take the call. It’s just you and Nico. A part of you doesn’t want to ask him the long-awaited question but you still do it anyways.

“I have to ask, did you do it?” You look up at him for the first time after reaching the garden. All you see are his eyes, they’re identical to the color of the way he takes his coffee. 

“No. I would never do that.” Nico pauses but doesn’t break the eye contact. You’re starting to feel light-headed. Your heart wants to believe him but there’s someone in your ear screaming that he isn’t telling the truth. 

“You’ve known me for a long time. Most of my time has been spent with you. You know I would never, ever fall for some girl. You know there’s only one girl I truly love.” He accentuates the last sentence. Only you know he’s talking about you. It’s a secret embedded between the two of you. You feel warm, not the bad kind, but the warm and comfy kind. He knows you need reassurance, he knows you think he’s lying, and he knows that if he did do it, it would be unforgivable. It feels like time is passing by slowly, you’re lost in his pools of melted chocolate-like irises. He never once, looked away. He’s telling the truth. 

“We’re due to be back now!” Looking back, you see Timo. He’s about 15 feet away, but he’s walking towards both Nico and you. 

“I’ll handle it. Consider it handled.” You look away. A burning sensation hits the back of your eye sockets. You feel like crying but you won’t let the tears fall.

Once Timo reaches you he wraps his arms around you and the President’s shoulders. 

“The band is back together!”

One hour. One hour is how much time you had given Gwen to find anything and everything about Vanessa Wyatt and boy did she find something. 

Gwen walks beside you, to your left. The pace you’ve set is fast, it wasn’t like you had all day. You had a firm to run and a man’s destiny in your hands. Vanessa Wyatt was just a fork in the road. You had a plan and with enough convincing, she’d end up on a bus to Wisconsin in the morning.

“You’re acting as my witness. Just shut up and listen to what I say. Do not engage with her.” Both you and Gwen had been following Vanessa around Easy Potomac Park for approximately seven minutes. You took immediate notice that she was accompanied by her dog, a golden retriever. Gwen had whispered something about it being adorable, to you it was an amazing conversation starter, a way to get in, and a vulnerability point for Vanessa. 

Vanessa’s quick to take a seat on a bench, overlooking the Potomac River. You waste no time to walk up to her and Gwen follows suit. “What a cute dog! Golden Retriever?” 

Vanessa takes the bait like a fish dumb enough to take a worm that’s on a fish hook. You’ve already got her right where you want her and you’ve only spoken six words. 

“Yeah haha! His name is Thomas Jefferson, like the President, it’s lame I know! But it suits him surprisingly.” The thought of how naive she is crosses your mind. Was she like that with Nico? You take a seat next to her before carrying on the conversation.

“Vanessa, it would be a mistake to think that there will be no consequences to you telling lies about the President.” Her face falls almost immediately. Gwen gives you a look. Almost like she was surprised herself, she was least expecting you to mention the so-called “affair” this early on in the conversation. To your dismay, Vanessa doesn’t make an effort to start running away yet. Stupid girl. Rather instead she questions you. 

“I never told you my name. Who are you?” She finally turns to get a good look at you. Vanessa notices the pale, off-white pantsuit that’s on your body. It fits you to a tee. 

“My name is Y/N.” You pause for a brief moment then continue your lecture to the younger girl, “And I want to make it clear that I’m not here in an official capacity. I’m here because I’m a

concerned citizen.” Vanessa looks away, tears threatening to fall on her plump, pinky cheeks. She isn’t wearing anything to keep her warm besides a thin coat. 

She mutters another question. “What do you want?” 

Your response leaves your mouth rapidly. “I came to warn you. A girl like you can’t win something like this. In, employment your face will be everywhere. And by everywhere I mean tabloids, newspapers, social media, local news. People are going to associate you with a sex scandal. All kinds of information about you will become available to the press in a heartbeat. For example, the 22 sexual partners you’ve had? What about that case of gonorrhea? Oh and let’s not forget your mothers two year stay at Bedford Hospital.” Everything you say comes out nonchalantly. You pause and take a look at the younger brunette, waiting for a response but she says nothing. You take it as a sign to continue. 

“That’s what I thought. It’s information like that, that could ruin everything for you.” Both you and Gwen take notice of Vanessa. The tears that were threatening to fall, are now halfway down her cheeks. Gwen’s heart breaks for the girl but deep down knows it’s for the best. You, however, could care less. Situations like this, never end up good for the woman involved. 

“He said he loved me. He gave me this dog.” Vanessa manages to utter while shaking her head. Her world feels like it’s falling apart and you stand at the altar watching it happen. 

“You see, it’s lies like those that could hurt you when said to other people. People not as nice as me. Here let me give you some advice, hand in your resignation, pack a bag and your dog, get out of this town, maybe in Wisconsin, and start over. Never look back.” 

You’ve managed to move closer to Vanessa. It’s not a lot but you’re still testing the waters. If you were to ask Gwen, she’s still surprised that Vanessa’s still sitting there. Personally, Gwen would have fled a long time ago. The younger brunette to your right, takes a deep sigh and begs, “Why are you doing this to me?” I’m a good person!” You get the urge to laugh in her face. It doesn’t matter if you’re nice or not, people love to ruin people. She should’ve known this by now. A girl this naive should not be in a town like this.

“You want to know who was also a good person?” You question her and continue, “Monica Lewinsky. And she was telling the truth. But she still got destroyed.” You say it casually and Vanessa doesn’t appreciate it, in the next millisecond, she grabs her dog’s leash and hurries away. Gwen is still standing, she’s shocked, to say the least. 

Turning to Gwen, you start to state, “If you get subpoenaed in front of a grand jury, you can testify as an officer of the court that I was working on my own. I didn’t blackmail or threaten her. If you don’t get subpoenaed, then this never happened.” You walk in the other direction from Vanessa. Gwen takes a moment to follow suit and once you hear Gwen’s footsteps, you take your cell phone out of your coat pocket to dial. 

“It’s handled.”

You are typing away on your keyboard, answering some emails when the doors to your office fly open. It’s Blair and she’s rushing in. You can tell her her brain is going 100 miles per hour when she cheers, “Paige is a whore! She’s a whore!” You shake your head and smile in return, expecting her to say more, and that she does. 

“I had Kurt hack into her message log and she had HUNDREDS and I mean HUNDREDS of text messages with this guy named Tom Henderson. And I know what you’re going to say ‘Go interview him then’ We’ll that’s what I did while you were gone doing god knows what!” She’s starting to get off track but you don’t mind. Blair was a chatterbox at heart. 

“Good news is that Tom spilled his guts the minute I went to ask questions, but he has an air-tight alibi. He was working as a bouncer at a club at the time of the murder. There has got to be like 100 witnesses.” You nod your head and before you can tell Blair anything she continues, again. 

“Oh my god! How could I forget?! Henderson claims that Sully knew that he was sleeping with  his girlfriend.” With that, you waste no time to get out of your chair, and before you can even take a step Neil comes strutting into the room. 

“Even worse news, the gun found in the murder has Sully’s fingerprints all over it. It gives him means.” A small “fuck!” leaves your mouth and you dash towards the double doors that connect your office and another. Pushing open the door, you waste no time to start interrogating Sully. 

“Did you know Paige was sleeping with Tom Henderson?!” You point your finger at him like a mom scolding her child. Sully replies stupidly, “What?”

“Did. You. Know?” Accentuating every word in the question causes Sully to get irritated.

“I hired you! You can’t come in here and talk-” Sully’s cut off by Neil almost immediately. You let him overpower the situation by walking away. Your mind is running, trying to think what the possibilities could be.

“Yes, she can! She can do whatever the hell she wants! Without her, you would be in jail right now!” Things are starting to escalate quickly between you three. Blair is just observing what’s happening. You decided to ask one more time even though you hate repeating yourself. 

“Did you know Paige was sleeping with Tom?” The tone that you ask him is softer, things are starting to get real and if you don’t get to the bottom of this, Sully could be going to jail for 20 years to life.

Sully answers your question, “Yes, but I didn’t kill her!” Your mind shuts everything out once he answers your question. Neil and Blair start conducting a plan that you have no care for right now. Deciding to walk away from all the chaos, you manage to bump into the one person you least expect. Vanessa, with Gwen following behind. 

“Oh, what the hell!”

“I want you to give him a message!” You stare Gwen down, scolding her with your eyes for even letting Vanessa in, in the first place. 

“That is not appropriate.” You take ahold of Vanessa’s upper left bicep, Gwen the other, and quickly guide her out of the firm. She tries to go with a fight but your grip doesn’t let her escape. You open the front door to the firm, giving Vanessa access to leave but she makes it clear that you hear what she has to say. “Not appropriate? You came to me and I know he sent you! I know you can give him a message! I’m telling the truth! I am!” 

“This conversation is over. Please leave.”

You’re barely coming down with your high from the previous chaos when David Rosen, the US attorney general walks into your building. 

“Times up, Y/N. I have a warrant.” He’s holding up white papers, stapled together. He’s here to take Sully into custody but luckily for you, David arrived earlier than expected. 

“I still have 40 minutes.” You bark at David, taking a look at your watch. Turning your back to him, you reach the conference doors.

“You can wait in the lobby by all means.” You suggest to David. Maybe he’ll listen to you once and for all. 

“Fine, but in 40 minutes I want Sully St. James in custody.” He huffs out. 

Meanwhile, you try to find Gwen. Once you see her in the conference room you have her call Blair, to let her know that you’ve officially been invaded and time is running out to find Sully a viable alibi. 

Blair, Neil, and Kurt walk through the front doors exactly 7 minutes before David is supposed to be arrested. Blair comes in hot, Neil and Kurt trailing behind her. She’s holding a flash drive and gives you a rundown of what that flash drive material contains. You take no longer than 3 seconds to head your way to the conference room where Sully St. James is currently seated. You tread the water lightly, not wanting to anger him when approaching the situation. 

“We don’t have much time, Sully,” you start with, “the police are here so I need you to listen.” Blair, Kurt, Neil, and Gwen slowly enter the room with you. Most of the time, when debriefing with a client, there’s always someone else with you. In this case, all of them. 

“We were able to verify your alibi.” Sully’s reaction doesn’t surprise you. Confusion shadows over his face. Almost like he didn’t even know how or who verified his alibi. 

“You were?” He looks around the room after he questions you. All eyes are on him and everyone can tell that he’s realizing that his secret is no secret anymore. You nod in response to his question. 

“That’s.. that’s a good thing, right?” He’s playing dumb and you’re catching along. You open your mouth to start a lecture. 

“Sully, you’re the most decorated hero since the Vietnam War, you come from a family of well-respected soldiers, you make your living giving speeches for the conservative right, and you’ve said over and over, that Paige was your best friend. Not your lover.” Your eyes never leave him during the duration of your speech, but when they do you signal Blair to turn on the TV and plug the flash drive into it. Once she does, a video starts to play. It’s from a security camera at an ATM, that so happened to be next to the bar Sully had been seen at before the murder. In the video, Sully St. James is seen standing on the sidewalk, hands in his pockets, pacing. He’s waiting for someone. Just on cue, a man in his mid to late 20s is seen approaching Sully. Once he gets his hands on Sully, he kisses him with passion. Almost like lovers who are reuniting for the first time after months of being apart. The room is silent up until the video shows the two grown men kissing. Sully’s breath starts to pick up, he’s infuriated. 

“Paige knew, didn’t she?” You already knew the answer to that but still needed the clarification. You were never one to go based on assumptions. Sully doesn’t respond so you continue, “She knew you were gay, the two of you had a deal.” Sully speaks up for the first time in 3 minutes. 

“You can’t show anyone that.” Disregarding what he said, you ask, “I need the name of the man that you were kissing.”

“Over my dead body! I serve my country. I honor the uniform! I am a conservative man. Everything I stand for is anti-gay. I am the deacon of my church! They’re talking about me running for Congress one day. I’m a hero. I can’t be gay.” His demeanor starts off hostile but then shuts down and he manages to whisper the last remark. 

“But you are. This is who you are.” You point to the TV which had been paused at a time frame where Sully and his secret lover were engaged in a kiss. “This is your alibi. Let us help you.” You walk over to the couch that Sully is seated at and crouch next to him. You and Sully are the only two who have spoken a word so far. Everyone else is watching the scene unfold in front of their eyes. 

Sully stands up straight and looks ahead of him. With one small word, he answers you. 

“No.” You stand, but before you can mutter a word he turns around and heads out the conference room doors. You don’t pay attention as to whether everyone follows you but you follow Sully out. Demanding him to wait but to no avail, he doesn’t listen. Once he opens the firm’s front doors, he is met with David Rosen. 

The bright ceiling lights are the cause of the forming headache across your temples. To say that everything that happened in the past 28 hours is ridiculous would be an understatement. Neil and Blair are at the police station with you. By the time Sully St. James had his mugshot taken, you got a text message from Gwen. You managed to mutter an ‘I have to go’ and frantically left. Having left instructions for Neil and Blair just in case anything happened with Sully. 

Being told, by Gwen, that Vanessa Wyatt was in the hospital and she was going to see her was just the cherry on top. You wasted no time to get there as fast as you could. It was 7 pm by the time you entered the hospital door, exhaustion hitting you like a ton of bricks. Getting into bed sounds much better than having sex. 

Gwen is standing outside of Vanessa’s hospital room when you get there. You greet her then immediately ask, “What happened?” You take a look at Gwen and she genuinely seems worried for the girl who’s in the hospital bed, clearly sedated. 

Gwen explains, “She slashed her wrists. There’s no press lurking around but one of the nurses told me her dad’s flying in from Michigan.” 

You double-check with Gwen, just to make sure that there is no possible threat. “No nurses or doctors, about anything?” Gwen shakes her head, her ponytail moving along with her head, and responds shortly. 

“Just to me.”

“Good stay with her.” You turn to leave, regretting to have even come in the first place. A simple phone call would have been fine. Before you take a step Gwen takes ahold of your upper arm and blurted your name. 

“Y/N! You told me to trust my gut when I first got hired, and now my gut is telling me that she is telling the truth-” You cut off Gwen to share what you think. 

“She’s not.” You keep it short and sweet. Nico told you that he didn’t do it and you believe him. Your heart believes him. He said he loved you and you were the only girl he’s ever loved. 

“I know the President, Gwen. He wouldn’t do this.” You’re starting to become stern since Gwen is being persistent about something that could never, ever possibly be true. 

“I just find it weird that she was going on and on about how there’s this secret room off the Oval Office where they’ve met, and I’ve read about the White House. There is a little room.”

You waste no time to state the obvious. “If you read it, she read it. People are crazy Gwen. They love to get fixated on famous people and stalk them.” 

“But I don’t think she’s crazy.” If you didn’t have any love for Gwen you probably would’ve smacked her for continuing to run her mouth. Since you do care for her deeply, you demand her to tell you why she thinks that. “Why?”

“Okay, she tried to take her life but she didn’t want to die. She called you right after she did it because she wanted him to find out she was hurt and come see her. She thought he would do that.” Gwen rambles everything out in one go as if she’s already rehearsed this conversation in her head. 

“Gwen-”

“She was going on and on about how she thought he’d come to see her and call her some stupid little German word.” You start to doze off but your ears perk up like a dog that hears a siren from a mile away when she mentions the word German. 

“What?” 

Gwen’s face scrunches up and tilts her head to the side at your remark. She’s questioning you and doesn’t even need to open her mouth. 

“Repeat yourself.” You try to tell yourself that you heard something completely different. How pathetic. 

“Oh! He’d call her a German word, she said it means treasure or something. Why does it ma-” You cancel out the rest of Gwen’s sentence and scurry away. Your legs start working independently and lead you down the hospital corridor. Gwen calls out your name in response, but you pay no mind to it. The pit in your stomach is probably the size of a football and it doesn’t help that bile is rising in your throat and everything feels hazy. Betrayal wasn’t something new to you but coming from someone who expected the same loyalty from you was gutwrenching.

Sometimes you think it’s crazy how much authority you still have in the White House because you simply do not work there anymore. Nonetheless, it comes in handy, in instances like these. Rose, the President’s Secretary, leads you the way into the Oval Office in a matter of seconds. It didn’t take much convincing, just a quick “It’s an emergency”. Once Rose opens the first of 3 doors that connect the Oval Office to the White House, you step inside. Walking up to the set of couches that sit in the middle of the room, to set your purse down, you notice Nico isn’t at his desk. Matter of fact he isn’t anywhere in the room. With that, you question Rose about Nico’s whereabouts.

“Where is he?” You expect her to go into detail, whether it’s a meeting or at dinner with Nellie. But Rose never does. Instead, she gives a simple answer. 

“It’ll just be a moment.” With that, Rose walks out and shuts the door behind her. 

It doesn’t take long for Nico to come walking through the door, Timo trailing right behind, but when he does, you notice his attire. He’s wearing a bowtie. Which only means he has something important going on. 

“Y/N? What are you doing here?” Disregarding his question, you plea to him with your eyes. He notices the quiver of your lip and how tears threaten to leave your eyes. Nico senses something is up. 

“We’re gonna need the room, please.” He demands Timo. Nico’s eyes never leave yours. Almost as if there is a magnetic pull to the two of you. Timo stands there dumbfoundedly and questions the President. 

“But, Nico you have to give that toast to the President of Mexico in 10 minutes. Maybe this could wait until after?” Nico’s eyes finally leave yours. He turns to Timo and repeats himself. 

“I said we need the room,” Nico demands almost instantly. That being so, Timo lowers his head, and his hand reaches to the door handle so he can close the door behind him. Once Nico hears the click of the door shutting fully closed he whispers your name. You take no time to finally repeat the word you know Gwen was talking about. 

“Schatzli, huh?” The word rolls off your tongue as if it’s venom. It makes you want to curl up into a ball and never be seen again. Nico turns to you and you repeat the word of endorsement like it’s a chant. You’re angry and Nico knows it. With that, Nico points up ahead. There sits a security camera that overlooks the majority of the room. Watching your every move. Nico knows he can’t have a conversation about Vanessa knowing he’s being recorded. Good thing he was a smart man. During the first week after his inauguration, he managed to find out that the camera doesn’t record past his desk. So the pair of you had rendezvous against the large crystalline window that overlooks Nellie’s garden and a patio. Countless times. 

Nico guides you to stand in front of the window with a simple, “Come here.” To that, you obey. As to why? You don’t even know the answer to that considering all you see is rage. You reach him, keeping your distance but still out of the security camera’s view. Disgust and humiliation still sits on your face, never intended to leave soon. 

Nico is the first to speak amongst you two. “You left me.” He can’t even look you in the eye when he finally admits the truth. A man who lies is always a coward. 

“Because you are married! You said you wanted to dedicate yourself to your marriage! I wanted you to be a better man and be the man that I campaigned for-” Nico cuts you off by slowly taking steps towards you. You don’t need to be a genius to know what he’s doing. 

“Do not touch me.” You planned for it to come out stern but ended up sounding like a hurt duckling. But that you were. The look in Nico’s eye confirms that he was not listening to you. Instead of him pleading for you to hear him out, he steps even closer. Once he reaches you, his hands rest upon your hips. His body aching to make contact with yours. Your body is pressed up against the large window with another step. Nico’s eyes stare down at you, faces only mere inches apart. The pair of you already know where the next thing leads to but you’re not letting him go that easily.

Before his lips can make contact with yours, you push at his chest to get him off of you. Putting all force you can conjure into the shove. You turn around and before you can think your right hand makes contact with his left cheek with a hard smack!

“I believed you! You clouded my judgment! I wanted to believe you because I love you and THIS is what you do to me? She tried to kill herself! Did you know she’s lying in a hospital bed because she slashed her wrists open? I destroyed that girl-” Everything happens too fast and you can’t even see through the tears that started falling just moments ago. Nico finally dared to walk up to you and kiss you. His right hand has ahold of the back of your neck. While the other is on your upper arm, keeping you in place. It takes less than a second for you to come to terms with what’s happening. As mad as you are at Nico, you couldn’t help but feel the need to return the kiss. Your internal dialogue screams at you to stop. To step away and never talk to him again. 

The kiss is slow and passionate, Nico doesn’t want to rush into anything further because he knows you won’t hesitate to take a step back and slap him again. You had the balls no one ever did. Before Nico can gain access to your mouth with his tongue, one of the doors is swung open. 

“I just want to let you know that we can hear you yelling.” By the time Timo shuts the door, Nico and you have created a small fragment of distance away from each other. The satin pinky nude lipstick you wore, transferred onto Nico’s lips. Your hair is a bit disheveled and the pair of you are out of breath. Timo was a smart man so it didn’t take much for him to recognize what was happening behind closed doors. Timo clears his throat before he speaks. 

“Mr. President, I recommended you go wash up.” Timo puts his hands in his pockets and refuses to look you in the eye. 

“Timo-”

“No. You have lipstick on your mouth. You have a toast to give. Go. Now.” With that, Nico obeys and leaves the room, not even looking back towards you. Timo and you bask in a moment of silence. You stand there like a doe who has yet to learn how to walk. The feeling of embarrassment is an understatement to say at least. In times like these, where Timo puts his foot down, it makes you feel like a child being scolded for writing on the wall with markers. 

Timo walks up to the President’s desk and admires the picture he has of the three of you. It was the day of Nico’s inauguration, the picture was taken right after Nico’s speech. Timo wishes things could go back to the way they were. 

“Oh mein gott,” Timo mutters under his breath. After the past two years of knowing Timo, you’d expect that he knew about the affair. 

“You didn’t know? He tells you everything.” You scoff. Nico and Timo are close. Like brothers, who manage to piss each other off all day every day but that doesn’t get in the way of Nico telling Timo every personal detail that goes on in his life. 

“He didn’t tell me this.” He shakes his head and looks down at his feet. 

You wipe a tear that cascades down your left cheek and  quickly mutter, “Because it didn’t matter.” In disbelief, you walk towards the couch, reaching for your purse. Feeling the sudden need to get out of the one place you do not wish to be at. Timo tries to grab at your wrist, tries to talk you into staying but you’re too fast enough for him to get a good grip. Once you reach the door, you adjust your purse and push the straps up against your shoulder blade. You take a deep breath, fighting the urge to stay. Alas, your right hand makes contact with the gold door knob and you twist and push the door open. With every last bit of courage you have, you step out of the Oval Office with your head up high. You’ve got a man to get out of jail.

[friend-shaped-but]

RATING EVERYTHING I'VE READ ABOUT THE MAHABHARAT(INCLUDES DNF)

The Navneet Mahabharat for Kids: 11/10, it did things to my brain and got me into the mahabharat in the first place. Have you SEEN the shikhandi in it?

13th day: 6.5/10 for the angst, 4 points taken off for the unnecessary yudhishthir POV and I think the author exaggerated on the abhimanyu POV a little bit sooooo. But ig it was necessary to provide exposition. There is this one conversation between bheeshma and karna which is just. really uh. thought provoking and interesting. Cis shikhandi warrants another point taken off, but she is actually so awesome that im gonna give half a point back. Also one more thing about 13th day I love is how ABHIMANYU IS SHOWN TO HAVE THE 'i gotta kill my family' CONFLICT IN IT BECAUSE HE HAS TRAINED WITH PEOPLE IN THE NARAYANI SENA. It's very blink-it and you miss it but it's Interesting. Krishna is a footnote(which, true, krishna and arjun being away from the battlefield and not being able to save abhimanyu is the whole point of that story and I found it really funny how yudhishthir was like. "Arjun's charioteer Krishna")

The Broken Sun: 8/10 the next book in that series, broken sun is the sequel to 13th day and covers arjun's vow to drona's death. I really loved bheem, ghatotkach, and the arjun POV and this book's insistence on solely referring to Karna as radheya. One point taken off for Slight Misogyny(ON THE AUTHORS PART. IM NOT TAKING POINTS OFF FOR PERIOD TYPICAL STUFF), and another point taken off for That Poop Scene.

Yuganta: 8.5/10, you clocked the Krishnarjun very accurately, mam, but I did not really like constant uh. comparisons? yeah. And the period typical touch of victim blaming. But you did shut down some other researchers that blame draupadi for things so. yeah points for that too ig. It is an awesome and well-researched book tho pls pls go read it.

The Aryavarta Chronicles Book 1: Govinda: 7/10. Points taken off for some of the weird sing-songy shit, the WMDs, and cis shikhandi. But shikhandi is very cool so like. 2 of the 7 points are because of that. And the firstborn-firewright thing which was so confusing it made me stop reading. DNF but I might go back for the awesome characterizations of everyone. Author matches my freak wrt not liking arjun that much.

Mrityunjay: 9/10, one point taken off because the prologue says this book is gonna be in "simplelanguage that everyone understands" but then shivaji sawant writes like everyone has swallowed a thesaurus. DNF because the marathi font was sans serif. If I manage to get it in a devnagri font easier on my eyes I will read it. It's just an well written book from a guy who was very excited about his blorbo and I respect that!!

Draupadi: 9/10, one point taken off for a take about satyavati I disagree with, but the rest of the book is so juicy and delicious. Aruna Dhere is COOKING and I want to meet her please and thank you.

Madhyamavyayoga: 10/10, actually. Bhasa, sir, I would like to invite you to tumblr for your hot takes and how clear it is that abhimanyu is your blorbo.

Pancharatra: 10/10. Well-written what-if by a guy who is excited about his blorbos. I respect that. btw his blorbos are bheem, abhimanyu, and karna.

Karnabharam: 8/10 because I had to study this in 9th grade(and that too in the midst of covid and my mental health going to shit) and it ruined it for me a little bit but hey I love it. Props for naming your work "Karna's issues". Sometime I might post the

On my list, haven't read these yet but I plan to:

Radheya, Ranjit Desai

Rashmirathi, Ramdhari Sinha Dinkar

Vyasaparva, Durga Bhagwat

Pandava Quintet, Roshni Chokshi

Yugandhar, Shivaji Sawant

Mysticism in the bhagwat gita

Mahabharat by NC Panda

At least a children's book edition of the mahabharat in marathi. Need to interact with the mahabharat in marathi more

Karna the sanskrit hero of the epic mahabharata: Kevin Mcgrath

Urubhanga

And any other interesting books I come across.

[sideprince]

Re-read this bit in Half-Blood Prince again and thinking about how blatantly it seems to be telling us that Harry is biased against Snape and our impression of him thus far has been clouded by seeing him through Harry's eyes (emphases mine):

‘The Dark Arts,’ said Snape, ‘are many, varied, ever-changing and eternal. Fighting them is like fighting a many-headed monster, which, each time a neck is severed, sprouts a head even fiercer and cleverer than before. You are fighting that which is unfixed, mutating, indestructible.’ Harry stared at Snape. It was surely one thing to respect the Dark Arts as a dangerous enemy, another to speak of them, as Snape was doing, with a loving caress in his voice? . . . ‘He tried to jinx me, in case you didn’t notice!’ fumed Harry. ‘I had enough of that during those Occlumency lessons! Why doesn’t he use another guinea pig for a change? What’s Dumbledore playing at, anyway, letting him teach Defence? Did you hear him talking about the Dark Arts? He loves them! All that unfixed, indestructible stuff -‘ ‘Well,’ said Hermione, ‘I thought he sounded a bit like you.’ ‘Like me?’ ‘Yes, when you were telling us what it’s like to face Voldemort. You said it wasn’t just memorising a bunch of spells, you said it was just you and your brains and your guts - well, wasn’t that what Snape was saying? That it really comes down to being brave and quick-thinking?’ Harry was so disarmed that she had thought his words as well worth memorising as The Standard Book of Spells that he did not argue.

Half-Blood Prince, Ch. 9

There's a direct contrast being drawn from one scene to the next between Harry's perception of Snape and Hermione's less-biased, more critical one. Where Harry hears a "loving caress" for the dark arts in Snape's voice, Hermione hears the passionate, determined explanation that Harry gave a year earlier - one based in a firsthand understanding of what it takes to protect oneself from harm against dark magic.

This is also the first scene in this book where we see Snape teaching a class. The first time he shows up in the book is when he's entrusted by Tonks to deliver Harry safely to the Great Hall from the school gates. So the first encounter with Snape in HBP is as Harry's protector, be it begrudging or not, and the second is one where an immediate parallel is drawn after between him and Harry, Hermione questioning the latter's bias and hinting to the reader that judging him based on Harry's perception may not paint an accurate picture of Snape. Through the rest of the book we see Harry have an increasingly hostile relationship with Snape while developing a great fondness for the Half-Blood Prince, despite it also being Snape, only Harry doesn't know that, so he's able to see his humor and cleverness.

This theme is a dominant one throughout the book, though it doesn't become clear until the end when we find out Snape was the Half-Blood Prince, but by then our impression of the Prince is murky given the unexpectedly violent outcome of Harry trying out Sectumsempra (and it can be argued he's to blame for doing so against another person instead of finding out what the spell does in a safer way), and our impression of Snape is even worse given that he'd just killed Dumbledore. We don't find out until the next book that Snape had been fighting on the same side as Harry the whole time, risking - and eventually losing - his life for the same cause. In retrospect, Rowling (boo, hiss) spends a lot of time in HBP dropping breadcrumbs that Harry's impression of Snape - and thus the reader's - is affected by bias and thus inaccurate.

[writing-n-memes]

A list of things I don’t like about the Percy Jackson show in no particular order because I’m a hater

- Sally talks back to Gabe. She’s supposed to be a silent rebel and book Sally would never jeopardize Percy’s safety because she’s angry with Gabe. Because I think the writers forgot, the WHOLE reason Gabe is there is because she is protecting Percy with his presence

- Annabeth is too stoic. Obviously, tv Annabeth has emotions and expresses them but it’s very limited in my opinion. Book Annabeth is emotional about everything. She is quick to anger, pride, sadness and to not show it because she’s ‘too smart for that’ is dumb. She’s 12 and emotions are normal

- Instead of Percy seeing the fates cut Luke’s string, it’s annabeth. Annabeth may be closer with Luke, but it should not be her to be aware of Luke’s fate. She’s too close to Luke to be analytical. Percy seeing it made him realize the prophecy is about Luke. Percy is the main character and should give Luke the knife. Also, Annabeth giving Luke the knife wouldn’t be nearly as meaningful because she’s always had faith he would turn around; even after he trapped her under the sky in titans curse. Percy trusted Luke to do the right thing at the exact right time

- Grover is a whole different character. The only example you need to know he’s not book Grover is tv Grover straight up lying/manipulating the god of war to his face. Book Grover is brave but not like that. He has too much respect and fear for the gods. Don’t get me wrong, I like tv Grover, he’s just not accurate to the book

- Misdirect of Clarisse being the lightning thief. What was even the point? Just seemed very random

-Fight scenes were lacking. I can’t entirely explain it, but I was bored for every one of them. Hate to bring the movies into this, but at least the movies had interesting fight scenes that had me on the edge of my seat

- Poseidon was basically a saint in the show, which is a big no no. I’m not saying he can’t be likeable, but Poseidon was NOT that nice. First of all, he wouldn’t go against Zeus like that. Not for Sally, and certainly not for Percy. He would do some minor rebelling, but he would not directly fight or disobey Zeus for either of them.

- Despite the last point, they showed too much of the Olympian’s bad sides. They absolutely would do all of this stuff in the show and more, but Percy shouldn’t be made aware of this yet. Percy knows the gods aren’t great in book 1, but he doesn’t quite know the extent until he finds out about the story of the oracle in book 5. This is why he’s more bitter in heroes of Olympus. He knows more about the god’s bad sides. If book 1 Percy knew/saw all the stuff about the tv show gods, then he probably would’ve led his own rebellion against the gods and Kronos.

- Gabe’s death? Come on. What happened to ‘If my life is going to mean anything, I have to live it myself’ (don’t know if that’s the exact quote). Sally deserved to kill Gabe. Percy could’ve done it, but Sally made the choice for it to be her. Ignoring the fact that Gabe wasn’t abusive, just a general jerk so he didn’t deserve to die, but also, the death being an accident felt easy. Sally killed her husband and she had zero remorse for it. She used his dead statue body to sell and use the money to go back to college and follow her dream of writing a book, while also meeting the real love of her life, Paul Blofis

- Kind of made this point already, but I’d like to specifically point out Athena being too cruel. Not to say she isn’t cruel, because she is. However, the show made it clear too early on. Annabeth is the favorite child up until mark of Athena, that’s why she’s so distraught over her hat losing its invisibility power. Annabeth always had Athena’s respect up until that point. Athena wants to protect Annabeth from Percy in the original series. She would not just try and kill her. At least, not in book 1

- Changing Medusa’s story. I understand to a degree why they did it. There’s been a lot of talk the past few years on social media about what Medusa’s story means to them. They did show Medusa as a victim, but immediately disregarded it because she uses it as an excuse to… kill children for no reason. Might as well have kept the original story in at that point. Not to mention Poseidon sucks, but only in this story, and he’s a saint for the rest of the show. Feels like that makes it worse

- Deadline didn’t matter. They miss it, but it doesn’t matter for no reason. Every book has a deadline, including in every spinoff so what’s going to happen with future seasons? Is the timeline going to be ignored because it was fine the first time? Or are they going to backtrack and say, ‘Ok, THIS time limit matters. Ignore the fact there was an exception the first time’

- Luke is too tamed. Too apologetic. He’s supposed to be angry. So sure he is right that nothing will stand in his way. Not any friend or family could talk him down at this point. We’re not supposed to sympathize with him. Not yet. He is the main villain at this point and there should be no sign of redemption yet. May’s story (his mom) happened way too soon. It was told in the last book for a reason. So Luke could gain sympathy and make Percy question his side; he does question it but doesn’t “trust” Luke until he gives him the knife 100-200 pages later.

- Annabeth was there for Luke’s betrayal. She should not be there because Annabeth is supposed to be a Luke defender for the whole series basically. ‘Luke was wrong, but he can change’ basically. I don’t know how she’s supposed to defend him when she experiences his betrayal firsthand instead of just hearing he betrayed everything she believes in. This is important because it’s the main conflict between Percy and annabeth through the series; Annabeth’s loyalty to Luke. Also, little side note: This is an example of tv Annabeth being too stoic. Book Annabeth would do what she’d have to in this situation, but she’d be a crying mess. Which is fine! Having emotions is normal!

- Dialogue is stiff. I don’t know why it is, but some things just don’t flow. Even direct quotes from the books doesn’t feel right sometimes. Maybe it’s because they rushed filming and should’ve done more takes to get it right? I don’t know. I don’t doubt the actors talents so I’m not blaming them. Walker Scobell did great in the Adam’s Project and he was only 12 I believe! He didn’t have a single line that felt stiff in that movie but his lines along with the other mains seemed a little off at times.

- Kind of goes along with last point; some dialogue is accurate to the characters, but not in the context it’s used in the show. Here’s an example that someone else pointed out and I agree with them completely. Percy’s line about Thalia having a pine cone’s fate is so out of character. Would Percy say that to Thalia in Titan’s curse? Probably. But would book 1 Percy insult and dishonor Thalia’s death after finding out she sacrificed herself for her friends? Absolutely not. Percy thought her story was brave and tragic. Percy would say that line in other cases, but he would not say it under those circumstance.

- Kind of the opposite of previous points, but why is Hades so nice?? They made him into a silly guy and play it off for laughs. It’s supposed to be a serious scene. There’s humor everywhere else in the series so use that humor somewhere else. Hades is angry because Percy ‘stole’ his helm and hates him for the rest of the series. How are they going to make this guy lock Percy up in the last Olympian and fight him? This is the guy Nico is scared of, which is why it was brave he stood up to him. This is the guy who told his son that he wished he died instead of his sister. Just doesn’t seem right

- They figure everything out too fast. They figured out who Medusa and Procrustes is right away. This series is kind of like an introduction to Greek mythology to kids who don’t know anything about it. It’s about learning, but also building up the tension. Knowing something is wrong, but not knowing what. I don’t care that they were all told Greek myths growing up and that 2 of them have been training for years. Learning something in the classroom doesn’t mean they will automatically know what to do in a real life scenario. Monsters are supposed to TRICK. That’s what happens in almost every book.

- Why were there four pearls only for them to lose one? When I first read the book, I didn’t think about them needing more than three so it felt super unnecessary

- I know I’m pointing out too much about each god that appears but I don’t care. Ares admitting he loves his family is soooo weird. Pretty sure he would take over and destroy most of them

- tv show watchers don’t know how close Luke and Annabeth are. Those two barely interact and they tell us a couple times they’re close from lines like ‘She’s like a sister’ and whatnot, but it doesn’t accurately portray the care they have for one another. It doesn’t help that Annabeth barely reacted to his betrayal in the show

[susandsnell]

did you see the current US les mis tour? i'm thinking of going (though i haven't bought tickets yet) and i'm curious about what might be in it for valvert enjoyers (including myself)

OH DID I EVER, FRIEND. It came to Canada this past summer and I cannot recommend getting tickets enough; it's possibly the best the show has ever been, and the cast is incredible. I didn't think I'd still be crying at it at this age and bam, Act 2 rolls around and there goes my painstakingly winged eyeliner.

Valvert is imo the most played up it's been, if you want to go in unspoiled I'll leave it at that, but I'll put more details after the cut. Spoilers/me being a cringe parody of myself below.

They've gone with both a lot more physical blocking between the two of them and a much more humanized Javert + book-accurately violent (albeit For Good Reason) Valjean than previous productions, all of which lends itself very well to the ship. Lot of lingering gazes in prison/grabs at each other, a genuine rapport between Maire Madeleine and the Inspector of Montreuil-sur-Mer, and then there's the Champmathieu trial through the Confrontation. Javert actively lunges for Valjean after his confession and the two leads I saw had such an intense chemistry you could see their eyes burning through that part.

As for the Confrontation, it's been choreographed/blocked to be a lot more suggestive violent than previously; there's a barely concealed smirk on Javert's face during "you'll wear a different chain" that I remember made me think "...my 12 year old self is thriving right now." Valjean doesn't snap until Javert tries to shackle him, at which point it goes into the whole "I am warning you, Javert!" bit. He uses that incredible, Brick-accurate Valjean strength to break free, deck Javert, and garrotes him with his own chain at the song's (heh) climax, until the man goes down to his knees, and if I'm not misremembering, he half-straddles his shoulder to keep him down. Before it gets into the "And this I swear to you tonight" bit, there's a good several moments of Javert left rolling on the ground writhing, gagging, and moaning (this would become a persistent thing as the show progressed) while still crawling towards Valjean, half-conscious and half-mad with obsession, reaching towards him. And then Valjean smashes his head into a wall, Liam Neeson in '98 style. I don't know what you go to the theatre for, but personally I do to see old men cry and beat the shit out of each other homoerotically.

Not much more happens in Act 1 (though the Intervention through Stars has as much reverence to it about the sanctity of their chase and their dynamic as it does the very structures Javert cannot fathom Valjean existing outside of - I think he presses his fingers to his lips a little on "Lord, let me find him" after crossing himself), but Act 2 at the Barricades is where things go wild again. There seems to be an Objectifying The Inspector agenda behind the scenes of this new production and I am here for it. Thus, please know that the Valvert barricade scenes take place with the mainstay of Javert having his shirt needlessly torn open/almost off by Les Amis / his ponytail getting dishevelled / him throwing his head back and moaning / panting at some points over the singing because he got his ass kicked again. Heavy, heavy appraisal in Valjean's "give me the spy Javert"/tugging on his bonds as he pulls him away to ostensibly take him out back like Old Yeller (for show for Les Amis, sure but I sensed a bit of spite/something else). And then Valjean's Forgiveness is just. Okay, so I got good enough seats to say that Javert is licking his lips during "How right you should kill with a knife."

What really made my jaw drop was that Javert, being played a lot more emotionally and erratically at this point, actually reaches with both hands once freed of his bonds to grab hold of Valjean's rifle by the mouth and pull it up to his head/press his whole chest into it on "shoot me now, for all I care". Which, yes, Imagery, but then you have them having a legitimate moment where Valjean firmly but gently pulls the gun away/him away from the gun, and holds his face/shoulder in a way I think was? Deliberately meant to echo the blocking of the Bishop during the whole "I have bought your soul for God" in the prologue. "There's nothing that I blame you for" is almost played as a realization despite the anguish Javert has put him through. As for the sewers through the end, each man is played as having increasing realization of how much they are two sides of the same coin, but during the Soliloquy, you have Javert screaming out/sobbing some of his lines about Valjean and how dare he transcend the very structures that gave sense and shape to his world. It has to be seen to be believed.

Outside of this -- there's actually a lot more work done outside their interactions to parallel them. Javert and Gavroche are given a rapport meant to run alongside the Valjean-Cosette relationship where you see a Javert who's a lot more indulgently annoyed towards this cocky gamin than aggressive (they have such a cute, funny moment together after Look Down/Javert's Intervention bit, Javert's not even mad and more 'are you fucking kidding me I lost to an 8 year old' when Gavroche blows his cover). It pays off because they worked in him paying respects when he sees his body during the Bring Him Home instrumental as they did in the movie (albeit more organically, because the scene is staged from Javert's POV seeing all the bodies at the barricade + he stops over Gavroche, kneels to close the boy's still-open eyes, and with a stricken expression, makes the sign of the cross over his body), to the point that you absolutely get the impression Javert is seeing his younger, disadvantaged yet striving self in Gavroche. With the instrumental cue being Valjean's song of paternal feeling for Marius, the staging really drives home that Javert had so many opportunities himself to go through a similar journey of personal growth through fatherhood. And there's power in these parallels when they're not interacting, too!

All in all, they went all in on every character relationship in this production and I cannot recommend it enough. The costumes are beautiful, the sets/effects are phenomenal, and the orchestration reveals just how beautiful the score really is. Go see it!!!

[mellkellyismyhero]

i think that maybe d+ is just not great at actually telling stories in tv form

the two big things i've watched on d+ recently are agatha all along and the new percy jackson series, and both of those shows had two big problems: short episodes, and characters/the storyline rushing on to the Next Big Thing before the Current Big Thing was over.

(spoilers for agatha all along and pjo ahead)

aaa suffered from that second problem less than pjo, because aaa had the trials that forced the characters to stop and concentrate on one thing, but as soon as the trial portion of the show is over?

OH MAN. suddenly we're not in agatha's show, we're in billy's show, and we can't take the time to properly wrap up agatha's show when we have to get billy going on his journey. don't get me wrong- i liked seeing more billy, but he should not have been a main character on a show called AGATHA all along!

and then in pjo, they had the trio solving problems that tripped them up in the book without breaking a sweat.

oh, in the books they got stuck in the lotus hotel because they're exhausted twelve year olds who need a place to sleep? well in the show they're Just Too Smart to fall into that trap. in the books, they're tricked into procrustes' waterbeds? well in the show, they know who he is so he's literally just there for a minute so the showrunners can play at being book accurate.

(and that's not even getting into the whole "annabeth tells percy about luke's mom YEARS too early" or the whole "luke casually drops the fact that annabeth's afraid of spiders instead of just including the best scene in the lightning thief, aka the scene that actually humanized her to the reader and made her a fan favorite".)

anyway. i think that d+ shows are... fine. but they SUFFER from their short episodes, which forces them to go at a breakneck pace that kills their quality

[2rats1gogh]

House of the dragon 2x02 very much redeemed the awful execution of Blood and Cheese in 2x01

The dialogue in this new episode was absolutely phenomenal. The scene of Aegon going batshit crazy after the death of his son was fantastic. I literally had chills. Tom carried the whole episode. I felt his rage with every atom of my body.

That whole sequence of the council meeting was 10/10. The way different people react to this awful tragedy, the way Alicent is heartbroken and feels guilty (although I wish they went in the direction of Helaena feeling guilty instead but whatever), Otto being very rational about everything, Aegon just being full of rage and despair. GORGEOUS.

I was a little disappointed with the way Aemond didn’t seem to care all that much. The scene in the brothel was alright, but it seemed off to me that he seemed to care more about the fact that the assassins were sent by Daemon to kill him, rather than grieving the death of his nephew. He literally showed more emotions when Luke died which is weird💀💀

I also wasn’t the biggest fan of the show’s excessive focus on Alicole. Don’t get me wrong but it just seems so out of character for Alicent to hook up with Criston soon after the death of her grandson, instead of comforting Helaena and Aegon who are grieving the loss of their child. That scene at the end was very weird and kind of unnecessary (again).

The dialogue between Rhaenyra and Daemon was surprisingly very good and emotional, and I am saying this as a team green supporter. I was even surprised that I started feeling bad for Rhaenyra. She has such a shitty husband, it’s actually pretty sad. At least she is starting to acknowledge it now, that she is more grown up and mature. Oh and I fucking hate Daemon, can’t wait to see him die. What a disgusting pathetic fucking asshole.

Their dialogue was fantastic, and felt super realistic, believable, and easy to follow and understanding. I loved it!!

The funeral scene… Chills. Literal, actual fucking chills. When they showed Jaehaerys’ little corpse with his head sewed back to his neck… My heart stopped for a moment here 😭😭😭😭 And Otto organizing that whole thing just to exploit the grief of Alicent and Helaena. Jesus. I don’t even know how to feel. It makes sense, and it was a good political move, but my heart breaks for Helaena especially.

At least it was shown that she is beloved by the smallfolk, which is accurate. Sure, she may not have needed that and preferred to grieve alone, but at least these people weren’t interrupting the funeral, like it seemed in the trailer.

Aegon punishing Blood was 1000/10 although I wish we had seen more of this. And him killing all the ratcathers… well, sad, of course, but can we really blame a grieving father? At least Cheese is dead. Although Otto was right, this is definitely gonna backfire.

Criston… Yeah, um. I guess that’s just how it is. Bro is projecting so hard onto everyone, jeez. Not a big fan of that, but it is what it is, and it’s kind of book accurate if i’m not misremembering anything?

Arryk and Erryk death scene was devastatingly sad tho. Absolutely horrible.

Overall, I’d say the execution of Blood and Cheese was horrible IMO, the way the consequences of it were shown was an easy 10/10. No complaints here.

[ajbullet]

My thoughts on episode 3 of PJO: (spoilers)

I so enjoyed doing this for the first two episodes and the response was great, so hey, maybe this will be an entire series thing

-The oracle was amazing. It was a perfect mix of creepy yet humorous with Percy’s perfect voice crack and “you’re a Halloween decoration” line. Having just reread the book, I wouldn’t have remembered that the prophecy came from Gabe so that was a really cool, book-accurate detail I enjoyed.

- The WAY PERCY CHOSE ANNABETH! I freaked out. Cause you know in the book Annabeth is just like “I’m coming” and that’s that. To see Percy go out of his way to CHOOSE her for his quest was so special to me and I loved it (even tho it was for a different reason than I originally thought.)

-Annabeth’s reaction to getting picked was perfect. This is a girl who has waited YEARS for a quest and in no way do I think she was expecting to be picked. Hoping, of course. But Leah’s expression of shock then excitement was perfect

- Grover talking to the horses

-Percy picking Grover

-“I’m going to back the best snacks” The snacks in question being tin cans

-Bro give Thalia a break Percy, wth 😭. He came at her so hard for someone he hasn’t even met. Which was hilarious and so Percy-like, but dang. I thought Annabeth was gonna kill him right then and there.

-“She met a Pinecone’s fate” Like this boy…🤭

-I loved watching Leah’s expressions the whole time the three of them were traveling to the bus terminal. I will never get over how subtle she is able to make her thoughts appear on her face. Like you could clearly tell she was taking everything in for the first time in 5 years, while still trying to remain calm and seem in control in front of the other two

-THE BICKERING OMGS. I wasn’t ready for the arguing, but it fits so well. It MADE SENSE. Like none of these kids know just how much they can trust each other and their all scared and they don’t really know what they are doing so of course they are going to fight and argue and take out their emotions on each other.

-Grover’s consensus song was perfect. I had no idea why he was clapping at first and when he started to sing I was scared because it had potential to be really cringy but I honestly think it fit his vibe and was cute.

-ok, so for the scene with Annabeth in the store, I loved of course cause it was my girl and I originally watched it as a kid with a lot of money placed in front of infinite candy and she couldn’t just pick ONE so she got them all and it was adorable. But I’ve also seen posts talking about her trying to read the wrapper and since she’s dyslexic she couldn’t tell what flavor was what so she got all of them, which would also make sense and is a perfect subtle detail. Now I just saw one post that said she was trying to pick the perfect candy to make Grover and Percy LIKE HER and that just about broke my heart. Feel free to comment or reboot with your opinions because I’ve loved seeing all these different takes on that scene. All I know is it was awesome and the contrast between a girl picking candy and immediately sensing something is wrong and putting up her guard was a perfect way of showing how life is for demigods

-The invisibility cap!!!!

-“We’re lost in the woods, somewhere in New Jersey and we’re never gonna make to LA” was all I could think about

- again the BICKERING. Annabeth calling Percy out. Her asking what he’s afraid of. Grover trying so hard to keep the peace. (As a middle sibling, I felt that in my soul). “He was my protector first!” Loved that. Just the whole conversation was so interesting

I’m gonna make a part two because I have so many more thoughts on Medusa and her story and I’m hungry so I’m gonna go eat.

Part two:

[superkooku]

Perseus' Grandson : first impressions

Ok ! I found a way to translate the Russian version of Perseus' Grandson from Henry Lion Oldie in a way that's actually readable (not perfect, but still...)

Btw I'd like to thank @alaknog for being willing to help me on this journey. I have some questions, feel free to answer them when you can, be it in a reblog or a DM.

And thanks to @sarafangirlart for exposing me to probably the best Perseus retelling (in my opinion) out there. Idk, the plot summary already sold me 😂. If it keeps its promises, then I'm in for a good time.

I'll post my first few impressions on my blog. Spoiler alert, obviously. I'll try to summarize the story so it's understandable, but those are mostly impressions and rambling. If anyone has a question, feel free to ask.

The parod

Genius title for a first part. Referencing ancient greek tragedies, especially with such a beginning.

Btw, it's about Perseus' death. Yeah,

He lies on his deathbed, surrounded by his loved ones. I like that we don't make him die in battle, that's more personal.

Andromeda is still alive, presented as a severe and headstrong woman that doesn't cry, despite being besides her dying husband. Idk it's different from the usual damsel in distress/self-sacrificing stuff we have. It's a welcome change :3

There's also Sthenelus, Gorgophone and ofc Amphitryon (our main character). The whole family is here on this tragic occasion. Idk it's weird in a good way to see them being acknowledged.

Ok, so the translation says "little Medusa/baby Medusa", and I was confused for a while. But I realized it's about Sthenelus' daughter, Astymedusa.

It talks about Zeus bringing his "son" to Olympus. But Perseus is dying, so is he being deified or is Oldie talking about someone else ?

Pretty original opening chapter, honestly. It begins on a strong/sad note and we're introduced to the family.

Episode 1 - Part 1

Ok, this scene was super confusing until @alaknog told me that there were OCs. I spent 30 minutes of research for nothing, lol.

Also, the translator keeps changing their names.

There's a dude called Lycus, his twin brother Firay (It doesn't sound that greek, but it's a translation from a russian reading of an OC name. We'd probably read it as Phireus or smth like that)

Plus one of Leucothea's sons with a mortal captain named Triton. All OCs

The argument is about Amphitryon being cursed because of Pelops' bloodline and him denying it.

They're fishing on a boat.

Little details about Amphitryon's youth like his mother calling him "my bull" or him biting Pelops' finger on their first meeting as a baby. Idk, I like it.

The twins are constantly teasing Amphitryon about him being cursed. And they have each other's back. They're rowdy boys.

They have two other OC siblings : Chrysus and the youngest called Polyphemus (obviously not the cyclops)

Annnnd that's when the chapter becomes less "teenage boys making fun of each other" and darker.

There's Chrysus, panicked, that comes announces that Polyphemus got killed by their own mother.

And the mother is dancing in the courtyard like nothing happened...

Oh wait... the mother killing her offspring... like Agave and the Minyades ! I'm smelling some good ol' dionysian madness over here.

If I'm right, then I'm in for a good time.

So far, I don't have much to say about the character dynamics, except for funny sibling interactions and the nice side of getting to know Amphitryon. Not much about his personality, though again, the translation makes it hard to understand subtext.

Episode 2 - Part 2

Oh goodness 😱😱, I was right ! The boys, probably searching for the mother, find her doing, well, maenad stuff (screaming Bacchos in an evohe, running around with torn clothes, etc.)

She's even dancing on the baby's corpse like he's not even there... ok, he's not even in the book yet but I can already confirm this is the most accurate adaptation of Dionysus I've seen

The twins' father is here. I think she's injured him and he has a broken arm. Anyway, he's crying. Understandable reaction.

I love how she's compared to an Erynie working for Hades and are like "no he's not the one responsible". Funny involuntary jab at Clash of Titans 🤣.

Lycus tries to get his mother back to her senses but his dad and Phireus push him, like "ARE YOU STUPID OR DO YOU WANT TO DIE ?".

The men are terrified of who will be targeted by madness next. Again, understandable. Dionysus' wrath would be a nightmare to handle

Ok, so the people are stuck in a dilemma : Dionysus' wrath or the Basilei's (the king's)

The king is Perseus, who comes in to see the mess. He's introduced like an uninvited guest, a stranger, who could be in his 60s.

This chapter takes place before the beginning considering, yeah, he's still alive.

Also, he's bald ??? We have bald Perseus now ??

I love how Amphitryon instantly glosses over the crazy woman dancing with a baby corpse and is like "yay ! Gramps !" 😂

But it means Perseus is a good grandfather who spends time with his grandson, super nice detail

Anyways, Perseus comes to the crazed mother and recognizes an invisible presence (jee, I wonder who it may be 🤔...)

Then she attacks him like a wild beast, but he firmly holds her arm, restraining her.

Also, he defeated her until she was lying unconscious on the floor, not showing any emotion. Probably because he's done it before or because any sign of weakness could be used against him.

The mother is clearly dehumanized. Her name isn't used, she's compared to a monster, an Erynie, a creature. It serves the scary factor pretty well. It's not a mother anymore, but a tornado, an animal, subject to godly insanity.

Perseus crushes grapes on her wrist and... she's neutralized. Does the maenads' strength come from magical madness grapes here ? Or is crushing grapes a metaphor ?

If Perseus is emotionless, Spartacus much less so. According to the dialogue, they went to neutralize some group of maenads but he couldn't do the same for his wife.

I say neutralize because I don't know if she's still alive or not. Probably...

Ok : more about Perseus and Amphitryon. The former drags the latter away from the chaos, in private.

Amphitryon seems to both admire and fear Perseus. He's a pretty intimidating man but, since he's pretty old, his grandson struggles to see him as the youthful gorgon-slayer. The more Amphitryon grew, the more he admired Perseus... interesting.

Lol, the text says that the people fear Perseus more than Zeus' lightning, because the lightning is far from them. Latina mom energy 😂😂

Perseus "the destroyer" they call him.

Lots of good stuff in this chapter !!

I like how he implications of having a maenad wife are shown. Perseus knows she doesn't recognize her husband and doesn't mind slaughtering any obstacle, but Spartacus doesn't have the strength to fight her.

Also, the baby killing. Yes that actually happened in mythology 😅 (not with this character, that's an OC, but to king Minyas' daughters for example. They refused to worship Dionysus and that didn't end well...)

And anyone following my account for a while could see how much I was craving scary Dionysus stuff in adaptations. Here it is ! And it doesn't disappoint. I don't care about the messy translation anymore, I have to continue.

Istg Dionysus is treated like an ominous distant enemy. His name isn't spoken, only the two first letters by (I think) Lycus, before being interrupted. Cthulu-like enemy, lol. I'm curious about the "crushing grapes" thing as well.

But small bald Perseus is so funny to picture XD. I like him so far, he's like one of those cranky grandpas who are war veterans. Or like strong old men in anime. And he had a badass moment, confronting a maenad while everyone else was terrified.

You know what ? From now on, he looks like this in my mind :

Like an angry Master Roshi with an armor, lol (imagine Perseus, like Master Roshi, being able to hide his muscles to seem like a chill old man and then BOOM: the destroyer is there !)

[theweeklydiscourse]

I decided to ruminate on Elain’s character a bit, I was hoping you’d join me.

I recognized right away during acotar one her character suffers from the same problems Nesta’s does where they were both not important, their purpose being only to push Feyre’s sob story along, the difference is that for whatever reason sjm chose to expand on Nesta upon Feyre’s return hence the whole part where she was able to see through Tamlins glamour, revealed she followed Feyre, asked her to teach her paint, encouraged her to go back while Elain still sort of took a back seat. All of this is not to say sjm didn’t give her character traits, she’s social and happy almost bubbly but in the first book she’s more just— there. More so than Nesta who originally was in the same cutout position. Keep in mind this was all in the same book.

Come book 2 I still get the sense she’s almost just there to serve as a contrast to Nesta’s actions, Nesta refusing to aide Feyre/ Elain acknowledges Feyre’s sacrificing to change her mind, Nesta puts herself in front of Elain when they meet Cassian, Azriel, and Rhys/ she is so terrified Feyre claims it’s a surprise she hasn’t fainted. It develops her character sure but she’s still almost just there. Seriously when she said ‘they can go to hell’ about the queens it would be such a blah, whatever, line if it came from Feyre or Nesta because at this point she’s still in a cut out position of just the cute, nice sister so a line as small as that one is so outstanding. The whole Cauldron scene Elain still felt just there the most remarkable thing (in the sense it’s an action that belonged solely to Elain, not to accentuate her character in contrast with another) is her warning Feyre of the knife being thrown at her because even the mate declaration scene was more of a Lucien moment. Nesta even gets the whole revenge point thing, labeled as Made differently than Elain, Uber powerful upon spilling out.

I think all this should be taken with a grain of salt because these are just my observations. There is some development in book 3 singular to her which I’d argue is small even in itself— her trauma reaction, the description of what Feyre sees when she looks into her mind, the heartbreak at the Made/Graysen situation. Although even in her biggest role yet, the killing of the King of Hybern, it wasn’t singular to her because it’s directly tied to Nesta’s ferocity. It’s a teamwork event that still doesn’t make it solely something Elain did. I think she takes off more so in acofas, but by then we’re several books in and she’s still not developed enough in comparison to other characters (Nesta) that had taken a counter part position along with her (cruel sisters), but by now Nesta has way more page time and narrative importance. That’s not to say she isn’t important, she’s definitely there but still just— not as present.

Now, I know some readers that resonated with her might argue that that is the point, that she’s just sort of in the background and now she will have to learn to speak up, take charge, stand up, which— yes I can see that’s what’s going on— but I still think this was more of an easy way out for sjm to have readers enjoy a character that in actuality is wildly underdeveloped. Which explains why said readers claim others lack understanding of her character “development” and then proceed to do the work for sjm of creating a character by filling in the blanks only to label misogyny when this *soft girl* aesthetic is not “understood”.

All this to say I’m pointing out how sjm truly hasn’t developed her at all yet sjm cleverly (arguably) makes the reader believe this is purposeful because according to the Elain she wrote “nobody really looks” so it feels like the reader is now given the liberty to do the “looking” and fill in the blanks to what is actually a very poorly constructed character 4 books in. What are your thoughts?

Always glad to ruminate, and I think your observations are accurate!

With Elain, we come back to the concept of the readers taking it upon themselves to fill in the narrative gaps left by Maas’s poor writing. Readers do this intuitively because on some level, they want the story to make sense even if that requires them to take some leaps to get there. Some gaps are smaller than others, with certain characters and plot points being gaping chasms that swallow the reader’s (and the fandom’s) attention. Some would like to believe that these gaps are purposeful as you said, but that belief makes me roll my eyes.

Elain is peripheral even in the sob story that Maas constructs early in ACOTAR. Feyre’s specific leniency towards Elain’s incompetence and failure to pull her weight is curiously overlooked even though she resents Nesta for the same reasons. This effectively dismisses Elain’s relevance to the negative beginnings of Feyre’s story and places her in a position of diminished importance compared to Nesta. I’ve tended to view Elain as little more than a lamp in the background of a scene because of how underdeveloped she is. Even Rhysand dismisses Elain when he chooses to assign more blame to Nesta for neglecting Feyre and brushes off Elain with: “Elain is Elain”. Oh I’m sure! As if that statement actually means something and isn’t Rhysand feigning insight into Elain’s character.

As you mentioned with the slaying of Hybern, few things can ever be accomplished by Elain alone. It’s very similar to the way the text removes her culpability from the supposedly grave sin of letting her younger sister hunt in the woods. Blame and ire is directed at Nesta, but at the same time, Nesta is receiving far more development and attention from the overall narrative. This in turn makes her more interesting, which leads to even more attention being paid to her and not Elain. Elain isn’t strong enough of a character to claim the glory of slaying the big bad, so that accomplishment has to be shared to give the moment its full impact. It makes me wonder how she’s going to carry an Elain-centric novel with such weak characterization.

On your note about Elain’s “soft girl” aesthetic, I completely agree. It’s not misogynistic to point out that Elain is an extremely underdeveloped character given the length of the series. Thousands of pages and yet we’ve hardly gotten a sense of who Elain truly is. Readers claim that this wait is intentional, but I call bullshit. If Nesta can receive development and have sustained relevance (positive or negative) why can’t Elain? The “softness” of her character is exactly what leads to her irrelevance as a character and keeps her as a pretty lamp in the background of any given scene. As much as I enjoy the creativity of the fandom, at a certain point, one must acknowledge the fact that Elain has a number of gaps in her characterization.

[clitorises]

Comparing spicy food to domestic violence...bad take lol. Why is a man beating you so he can orgasm better than beating you in general? It's worse. If a man slits your wrists because you asked, is that OK? You people are mentally ill.

A radfem in my inbox? Who didn’t bother to read my blog before messaging me? On anon, no less? What a surprise. Alright, let’s dance: I’ll point out your small mistakes before we move on to the big one 🖤

1. I’m a dominant. Nobody is beating me, unless, of course, I order them to.

2. I’m a lesbian. No man is coming near me, let alone COMING near me. Gross.

Alright, now that that’s out of the way: your concept of what BDSM is appears to be sadly informed only by Fifty Shades (Powerful Man Hits Helpless Woman!!!) which is… not reflective of the realities of this lifestyle. “Negotiation,” or talking to a potential partner about what you both want, is a bedrock of these relationships. You can find plenty example of yes-no-maybe checklists on the internet or in books—it’s quite common for partners to fill out a checklist of this type and compare them. Anything that anyone has marked “no” on is off the table-

“But wait!” you say, as I mention consent, “Men don’t care about consent! Men watch violent porn and reenact it on women! Men prey on women who are seeking BDSM relationships in order to abuse them!”

Well. Yeah. You’re right. This is not because of some innate evil in BDSM. This is because our patriarchal culture is built on male entitlement. Like… come on. I will point you to one of your own philosophies, the rules of misogyny, and I will speak to you in your own language:

I, a dyke, who is fascinated by the intersection of pleasure and pain and have been incorporating it into my sex life since it began, have nothing to do with men abusing women in any context. Period. What I do with other lesbians does not perpetuate male violence. Males perpetuate male violence. I KNOW you know this. Do not waltz into my inbox pretending ignorance. I will not pretend ignorance either: BDSM is risky on its own, and that risk increases exponentially for women who seek male partners in the scene. I love those women and do what I can to protect them. I will not, however, change my approach to sex or my general hedonistic philosophies just because men use BDSM to hurt women. If I never engaged with anything a man has used to hurt a woman, I would spend my life doing a whole lot of nothing.

Alright, that’s quite enough of that. Back to negotiation and consent: As a dominant, I’ve found that much more of my time is spent being told a submissive’s dangerous fantasies, and figuring out how to take them as close as I can get them to their desires without actually hurting them. Choking (or, more accurately, strangulation) is a great example of this. Many submissives actively desire that helpless feeling, that light-headed euphoria. I, however, do not want to kill any of my beloved’s precious braincells. So we negotiate, experiment, and find ways to achieve what they want without doing anything that I mark as too dangerous. But that’s just one example: any potential act is discussed in detail before a scene begins. Either partner gets to say no to anything during these discussions, and during sex as well, just like in vanilla sex.

My spicy food metaphor was silly, but it has a grain of truth to it—things that hurt can feel good, too. Contact sports, roller coasters, skydiving or BASE jumping, bouldering or ice climbing, even running marathons, are all things that are scary, painful, dangerous, or carry risk. Humans do them anyway. We love doing them. I love doing them. And you are not going to change my mind by strawmanning in my inbox. See you around.

[trinitywc]

big fan of the great light!!! do you have any advice for story structure/finding the balance between slow and fast pacing?

so long answer, as usual

I start off by thinking of the Main Points I want to write about, and then fill out from there with Secondary Points. For example, TGL: Main Points (this isn't 100% accurate to the book just a rough example) - WoodClan and CreekClan go to war; a nuclear bomb is dropped - The cats are split up, but find each other by a badger sett - Radiation sickness sets in while trying to find their friends - The cats decide to leave to find their Clan Is the basic plotline, and then i fill it out with moments I want, I'm calling these 'Secondary Points', these are what needs to happen to allow the 4 Main Points above ie for the First point to happen, the Clan needs to be introduced and the setting developed so; - introduce Pinepaw and those closest to her, her mentor, her sister, - introduce the war between the Clans - give Pinefrost a motive to hate WoodClan (her mother's death) and reject her pacifist wishes - hint at the human war with various planes, barbed wire, and soldier mentions So I made a timeline of Apprenticeship > Warrior > Bomb, adding scenes that served a purpose (Secondary Points) and those I deem necessary; introducing a character like Blackwillow as mysterious but distant from his Clan by having him appear on the riverbank, showing Chestnutspike and Ouzelheart's relationship, showing CreekClan's buildup to war and training, showing Pinefrost as a rash, impulsive, but curious, young cat by introducing her as runnign away from her duties to explore the forest (with her friend who wants to impress her). "Necessary" scenes in WaCa fic are stuff like 'this is the medicine cat' 'this is her warrior ceremony' 'this is Clan life and hunting and patrolling', so mileage will vary on your story. When it comes to "fast vs slow" pacing, I'm not sure. I think by starting with the Big Points and whittling down, you can keep the story going- and Story also includes character moments - the "break" in TEW where the cats are in the House also explores the ruined city and affects of the bomb, gives Cuckoopaw and Rutherford some character moments (ie training sessions), not everything is nuclear war 100% of the time. Even if characters are doing something "slow" like walking, or routine hunting, something can happen- character motive reveals, backstory, or just some joking to build relationships, a nice 'break' from the fast 'something happening all the time'. I like to think back to first arc warriors were something happened every chapter (Dangerous Path - Tigerstar is revealed as ShadowClan leader, then Whitestorm reports smelling dogs, then Fireheart bumps into Greystripe in RiverClan, then Cinderheart gets 'pack pack kill kill', then Fireheart observes Snowkit acting weird, then Bluestar refuses to make new warriors, all in the first five chapters; all these are tied up by the end; vs the newer books were to me, it feels like a whole lot of nothing happens in between each chapter)

Later, I'll end up going back and adding things once I know how the rough outline goes- ie once Flaxstripe ran away from the Clan, I went and added some scenes of him being selfish and self-serving- I think it's best to get the skeleton and then paper mache on the meat of the story. 'Slow' pacing is where nothing happens (ala Stevie King where he drones on and on about advertising or some 'scary' childhood story with no relevance to the plot), as long as you are providing some information- be it plot, character beats, 'a nice break', or some fun. Eg, if a character is walking home, that's not very interesting just describing the path home, think of why you're describing it- are you setting up their home route or have we been here before and could skip it with a brief 'and she went home' mention? Is she daydreaming about the awkward goodbye she just had, or her plans for tomorrow, or marveling over the simple beauty of her walk home?

It depends on what you are going for, but if you start small and go big, it works itself out

[nahualnextdoor]

Character Analysis for Shitpost's Sake (long post; tw suicide discussion):

A funny haha, a whimsy silly image. Something I did in like 10 minutes...

Well behind the scenes I spent an entire night dissecting every episode and book paragraph in my head just to see what box fits what character (I take my silly guys very seriously and my shitposts should represent their characterizations accurately otherwise I'll kill myself).

So, here we go.

Active suicide risk: (literally anyone except Cleo and Six)

-Resus: Pretty obvious and intuitive in my opinion. Our favorite trans allegory emo boy that literally sleeps in a coffin. Hates pretty much every aspect of his life, thinks he's a disappointment to his family simply for existing (and sadly kinda is), and is pretty much fine with death as a whole (most of his friends already went trough it, after all).

-Luke: This one was also pretty obvious in my opinion. While not as clear cut or active as Resus, there was this one time where he decided to banish himself to the Underlands, no hesitation, as soon as he found out (or rather was made to believe) he attacked his parent. He's very often ostracizing himself over his lycanthropy hurting those around him, and for the major part of the book series he believed himself to be a burden for his parents. (Also he has like. Zero sense of self-preservation, at least in the tv show).

-Luella: Oh boy. Where do I begin with you girl. Just her living situation alone is sad enough, add in her attachment issues, her lack of control over her emotions, her crush on a guy that treats her... horribly, and her lack of any meaningful friendship in her life up until she became bffs with Cleo in s2. Honestly I'm just glad that by the end of s2 she's mostly content with her life the way it is, but still... at least on the episodes before she got her shit together, I'd say she's kinda worrying.

-Dixon: Yeah this guy's life is just hell lol. I'm not really getting any suicidal vibes out of him, but it is more than plausible.

10/10:

-Cleo: She's just... I love her 🙏🙏 Badass, one of the most interesting characters of the tv show in my opinion, autistic as fuck (they all are, but she's the one I relate to the most), curses the entire town in order to fix her problems and is pretty much happy despite being in an eternal sisyphean cycle.

Needs to retake the am I gay quiz:

-Resus: self explanatory I think. He really needs to get his shit together because I just cannot tolerate when he's all over Luella "oh luella I need your help with this spell and also brain drain dumped me in a wet cardboard box and killed my grandma 🥺🥺" and then going "well thanks for nothing, fuck u and ur stupid useless magic, also even tho we're nothing I will get all possessive over u at the slightest possibility of u liking Luke hey can we kiss to save the world btw" She deserves so much better than him omg. Boy you're queer!!! Leave her alone and just stay with the werewolf!!!

Cannibalised first in plane crash scenario:

-Resus: I just thought this was funny lol

Adderal prescription ASAP:

-Luke: Also pretty self explanatory. Lycantrophy is the magical equivalent of autism and adhd in this universe, I don't make the rules. Both in the books and in the show he's shown having a hard time focusing on class, finding it easier to just focus on his videogames. He spends hours playing on his console, to the point of ignoring his baisc needs, and is pretty hyperactive in my opinion, at least in the show. Really I wish they'd bring back the idea of Eeafa (or maybe even Luella) figuring out a potion or spell to help him manage his wild side, wich, to me at least, is not only his wolf self, but all of his neurodivergent tendencies in general (basically it would be magical meds that makes you have more control over the wolf form on top helping you study).

Missing person:

-Pretty much all the other kids from the books but I choose Kian because he's kinda the one that has the most relevance and the only one with an available image on the internet that is not a 3 pixels wide scan on the Internet Archive (still love them tho). He could potentially be on active suicide risk once he gets old enough to understand what happened to his parents tho, but thinking about that for more than 5 seconds makes me cry so I prefer not to.

And that is basically it! Thank you for listening to my ramblings and analysis of these silly little guys that keep rotating on my head like rotisserie chicken ballerinas. Next will probably be my still pending character analysis for why I assigned the slimes I did on my slime rancher post.

[the-great-knight-gay]

My PJO episode ratings

Before I wanted to start I just wanted to say that I reserved all judgement about the show until it was over because I decided to trust the writers and let me tell you i LOVED pretty much every change because thats what adaptations are about

changing whats not good anymore or improving where it can be

and mainly KEEPING THE SPIRIT OF THE BOOKS WHICH WAS DONE MASTERFULLY

SPOILERS OBVIOUSLY

Now on to the rankings

EP1: 7/10

This was a solid start to the series which pretty much perfected most of the characterizations. I had a few issues originally but these were pretty quicky turned around.

Mrs Dodds fight at the MET was too short but was made up for by her increased appearances across the season which was really nice imo

random cuts to black to avoid showing the car crash - (i had this problem two other times in the show which was during ep2 and ep5 but i dont mind it anymore but ill discuss that later)

grover felt kinda sleazy for me at the start but i did make my peace with this change overall because of something later on.

EP2: 8/10

Ep2 had the same feel as Ep1 being so very Percy Jackson esque with the humour and the characterizations

LUKE WAS JUST SO LIKEABLE AND IT BROKE MY HEART THAT WE WOULD HAVE TO SEE HIM BETRAY PERCY LATER

ANNABETH JUST SAYING YES SHE STALKS PERCY WAS JUST ICONIC

The fight choreography was also just top notch and Dior's scream was just amazing and i cannot believe that it was unscripted

just goes to show how the casting is so perfect - does not matter at all that they don't look book accurate

again the cut to black was kinda annoying for me as we just skipped the council of cloven elders scene which had SUCH A GOOD SET and i was so dissapointed when we didn't see it but otherwise i had a really good time

DIONYSUS WAS JUST PERFECT TOO

I don't mind that they cut the bowing for the claiming but they could have done it so only the big three kids are bowed to which shows how revered they are

percy not wanting to go on the quest and only going when grover says his mom is in the underworld just exemplifies percy's momma boi tendencies and fixed grovers character for me which made it all the worthwhile

EP3: 9/10 - MEDUSA WAS SO GOOD

I LOVED ALL THE CHANGES IN MEDUSAS STORYLINE THEY WERE SO GOOD AND ACTUALLY FIT THE CHARACTER

This is one of the most accurate mixed of greek and roman mythology for medusa i have ever seen.

in the original greek medusa was more of a monstrous figure while the romans started to paint her as a victim of the gods spats and this i feel captures both parts to that really well and JPK just kills it.

Grover is really good in this episode just trying to hold it together and then giving percabeth a reality check at the end is so good.

EP4: 8/10

Step down from ep3 for me mainly because i wanted to see more of the chimera fight and because it was a little too expositiony at the beginning but overall really solid episode and the change in the fall from the arch is really well done

not much to say really

the kids are getting better and better throughout the show

'its like you want me to make fun of you'

this is percabeth just how i imagined them

walker and leah killed it and aryan is just amazing as well.

EP5: 10/10

WHAT IS LOVE

BABY DONT HURT ME

DONT HURT ME

NO MORE

EP6: 7/10

lets be honest the only reason people wanted to see the lotus scenes was because the movie popularized it and retrospectively because of nico and bianca

if was a tiny (but significant) part of the book and didn't really need to be the whole episode pretty much but I did like how they handled it as compared to the movie version which, while fun, did not really fit a percy jackson kind of vibe to me personally.

Lin Manuel Miranda was really good at playing Hermes and grovers scenes were some of my favourite (especially because thats where we get the di angelos easter egg but whatever)

overall a bit of a dip but still really fun for me to watch

plus i love dua lipa so the music change was a big win for me

EP7 9/10:

HADES WAS JUST AS I IMAGINED HIM. NO HOLLYWOOD HES NOT A BIG TERRIFYING SUPERVILLAIN HES ACTUALLY KINDA CHILL AND THE FLASHBACKS WERE JUST SO GOOD

THE UNDERWORLD CGI WAS GREAT

Procrustes could have been done a little better because it really feels like the suspense was taken away during that scene but the flashbacks were so good

THAT POSEIDON SCENE

THE SHOW WAS SETTING ME UP TO HATE HIM AND I JUST FELL IN LOVE WITH HIM IN LIKE 2 SECONDS

NO ONE SAID TOBY STEPHENS VOICE SOUNDED LIKE THAT

THE THUNDER FOLLOWED BY 'ONE DAY'

CHEFS KISS

ABSOLUTE KUDOS TO THE WRITERS YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING

EP8: 8471782487261078480/10:

JUST PERFECT. ARES FIGHT WAS REALLY WELL DONE

PERCY AND POSEIDON JUST BROKE MY HEART AND MENDED IT THREE TIMES WITH LIKE 4 FACIAL EXPRESSIONS

'do you ever dream about mom?'

AND I LOVED LANCE REDDICK AS ZEUS (RIP)

I AM SO UPSET WE DO NOT GET TO SEE MORE BECAUSE IT WAS SO AWESOME TO WATCH

LUKE WAS JUST AMAZING

THE KRONOS SCENE WAS SO GOOD

THE BETRAYAL JUST BROKE MY HEART

'i heard everything'

I DID NOT EXPECT ANNABETH TO SHOW UP THERE

THE DISNEYLAND REFERENCE

SEARCH THE SEAS GROVER AND GET US A SEASON 2 BECAUSE WE NEED IT ASAP

OVERALL THE SHOW IS LIKE A FULL 9/10 FOR ME

[rxyhiraeth]

thoughts on pjo ep 6

also SPOILERS FOR PJO

i’m just kinda getting all my thoughts out on this episode! it was very interesting and VERY different from the books but not in a terrible way! i trust uncle rick with this show and im more so just curious why some things were changed from the books so much, and im sure a lot of these are going to be answered themselves in these last 2 episodes.

i also love hearing everyone’s ideas about what is going to happen from this point on cause ik even book fans are LOST

no zebra moment! i can’t think of any other moments in TLT that would give us time to learn about percy being able to talk to them, so this is probably going to get brought up for the first time with the hippocampi in SOM which actually works out. i would have loved to see this scene, but i can get that it would have taken up a good chunk of time, and for production reasons probably had to be skipped for now or entirely cut from the season.

clarisse?? traitor?? *LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER NOISE* i have my thoughts on why they did this, but also not?? i figured they did this to balance out the conversation percy and annabeth have with hermes about luke in order to take some attention away from it as to not make it TOO obvious he is the real traitor, but also why even have that conversation about luke in the first place then?? idk. i’m not sure if this is something that will be explained or make more sense with the rest of the season, and if not, i hope uncle rick can explain why this choice was made. there are so many choices in this episode that i would love to hear explained as to why they decided on it!

going off the last point, i do feel like they are slightly forcing the luke is the traitor point for the audience. we never got this much about luke in the books while they were on their quest, and even when he was talked about, nothing really pointed in the direction of him being the traitor. maybe im just an idiot but i remember the luke reveal being pretty shocking! i hope they don’t force it too much and allow everyone to guess it before the reveal even happens! maybe this is just me wanting it to be just like the books, but i guess they do need to hint at it here and there in ways the books didn’t?

also am a little weary about the “old married couple” comment. i hope they don’t speedrun their relationship. this is a SLOWBURN i hope it stays this way!

i get not having poker face in the casino. rick HATES those movies and probably wants to make this as different as possible while still being accurate to the books. honestly tho, dua lipa was a good ass choice. i can’t complain about that.

HELLO I HEAR NICO!!!!

also CAMP JUPITER CAMPERS???? MAYBE???

besides being confused as to why the casino scene itself was pretty different from the books, it was a great event regardless. extremely well produced and was so fun to look at and watch for little details with everyone in the background. that being said, i was hoping for a bit more of a montage type scene. percy and annabeth didn’t get to have any real fun like in the books, it was mostly all grover. i don’t really know shit about production of tv shows and such, but i’m shocked the casino scene was changed this much from the book. but uncle rick i trust you wholeheartedly.

i did love them using the casino card to get a taxi to santa monica, but the hermes taxi in this was better. i was giggling the whole time. percy “i fought and killed a minotaur how hard can driving be” jackson my sweet child. and percy running the taxi into the damn wall because he was busy looking at annabeth??? love them so much

the only two things that REALLY confused me as they are changing major plot points:

1: 4 pearls?

2: the solstice is OVER??

the 4 pearls defeats the whole purpose of them arguing about who is going to stay in the underworld. either this plot point is going to change a lot, OR they are going to lose one of the pearls on the way, but if that is the case, what’s the point of giving them 4 if they are still going to end up with 3? i’m assuming it is going to be the former option, as getting 4 just to lose 1 for the sake of it doesn’t make much sense.

solstice??? over??? i’m very confused on this. this feels like it defeats the whole purpose of continuing the quest, but obviously percy is still determined to get sally (king), so we aren’t just ending the quest. i’m curious to see how these two plot points effect the rest of the season and why these were chosen instead of keeping the original plot!

overall i did really like this episode!! obviously it was very different from the book, but we can’t expect this entire show to be EXACTLY like the book. i would love to hear rick talk about a lot of the choices made throughout the season and why they were done. he has seemed very proud of this show and how it has played out, so i trust him with whatever he decides to do with it.

also if you have thoughts on the reasoning behind any of these changes PLS I WANNA KNOW