#this was the worlds dumbest ramble

[mediocreinternetuser]

doing a rant abt my uncommon name bc that’s my duty as someone with an uncommon name.

it’s rlly not a big deal but it’s so difficult trying to teach people how to say my name!! like i’m a pretty patient person; if someone’s genuinely asking how to say my name i’ll slowly pronounce it for them around seven times before i give in and just tell them it’s right. and while i go to a traditional catholic school that consists of a lot of biblical names, there’s a lot of names that are uncommon or aren’t english names and nobody has ever had as much trouble with any of those names as they do with my name. and then people, as in people with names like nicholas or sarah, get angry at me because during the past five years they’ve still not managed to say my name right but then when you do try and correct people politely they start like huffing and taking up an aggressive tone after like the third time i’ve very kindly told them that they’re not pronouncing my name right (which wouldn’t be a fucking problem if they’d stop pronouncing it the same wrong way each time i correct them but wtv). i really don’t know where i was going with this but i am just so sick and tired of people acting like i owe it to them to teach them how to say my name multiple times and that i owe them a lot of respect while they can be as impatient as they want towards me

[ravewing]

i always think to myself man i wish i had a really kick ass name instead of stupid jacob like ok basic and its like no i literally hand picked that name on my own what am i even complaining for i brought this upon my self

[xaloncat]

Rodger and Glisten are ex husbands and toodles sees glisten every weekend I take no criticism

Glisten is currently dating boxten by the way

[ace-of-hearts-and-spades]

I don’t normally post about Batman stuff because I have a lot of Opinions that would probably get me shot down in the street here in the Tumblr Batfandom. But tbh I think trying to apply real-world logic to Batman is a mistake. To a certain degree, it’s innate to the concept – he’s a vigilante working outside the law because it failed him and so many others, the various moral quandaries, etc. etc., and there are a lot of opportunities to analyze real-world problems through the framework of Batman media.

But way too many people get caught up in this idea of “Batman is bad because in reality [insert various gripes here]” when tbh I think Batman media works better when you treat it like a dark, Grimm Brothers style fairy tale. Trying to look at the text solely through the lens of our real world doesn’t work because it’s not meant to represent the real world. Everything about it is heightened and exaggerated and yes there are absolutely elements of the real world and it takes a look at real world issues of justice and whatnot but the criticism of “Batman is bad because he’s rich” or whatever the fuck is fundamentally missing the damn point.

[aashiqui-aashiqui]

i need to be shot

[vinyls-and-valentines]

Man, I wish I was a better judge of whether something is popular or not 'cuz that'd save me a lot of needless frustration when it comes to online discourse

[nero-neptune]

i know i'm over a decade late to this realization but– ptv's "props and mayhem" was about the john boyega classic "attack the block" the Whole Time??? of "this is MY BLOCK, GET ME" fame??? it's named after those kids in the movie called "probs" and "mayhem"???!! get that snitch / get the strap / don't give a fuck / BRAP BRAP BRAP????!!!! (i'm crying real hysterical tears over this btw)

[excelsior9173]

so a few weeks ago i went to a house party at my buddy’s place. saw a lotta friends, had a great time. drank way too much and was probably the most blackout drunk i’ve ever been (always check your drink % folks!) like, i don’t remember leaving the party or going home or anything. i only remember hitting on my sister’s gf and eating chicken nuggets (yeah, i’m classy like that 😎)

anyways! today i found out that after i got home from said party, i somehow managed to send a photo of a supper i made over a month ago to the group chat with said friends, and i heart reacted to it 😂

apparently shitfaced exie likes to share their cooking exploits??? i was in truly fine form oh my god i can’t stop laughing

[another-shameless-fangirl]

It would be pretty great if my office job let us work from home but yeah no let's be super busy instead since the other, larger office is basically shut down because of icy roads and they can just use up their paid time off because they don't wanna die.

I'm going to fire myself into the center of the earth and feast on fire

[ecivons]

I really hate how hard it is to find a portrayal of my favorite ships that I can really enjoy. As much as I do love the cliche dumb tropes and couple memes that people use for fanart and fanfics it ends up kinda muddying the entire fandoms perception of a character. And I really do get it. I understand the fun self-indulging and I love consuming the works of people who love a character so much that it starts to sound like they’re just talking about one of their ocs. It’s is enjoyable and all, but I can’t enjoy when ships push a trope so hard that the characters involved aren’t even themselves- they’re just kinda empty shells that exist to fulfill the dumb trope.

I am drawn to certain ships for a reason. I loove categorizing the characters and relationships that I enjoy and using them to psychoanalyze myself like a weirdo. It’s funny to notice all the patterns in my interests. But the thing is, Idk where I’m going with any of this to be honest even if there are loads of similarities in the characters I’m drawn to, or the ships I tend to like, or the stories that are always on my mind, I enjoy the nuance of each one. I don’t know- it’s just kinda dumb to want to read fics for a specific ship and it’s an au where they’re childhood best friends because their parents were and I want to enjoy it but I can’t because my favorite thing about the ship is the fact that they have such a strong relationship because they CHOSE it- not just because they happened to know each other as kids. And there are days when I just read it because ‘ok shrug seems cute enough’ but it won’t be something that sticks in my head for months like fanworks that explore a character for who they are and not as a placeholder for something that people find romantic.

[newvegascowboy]

1. They have done this before

2. Both of them privately decided that Doomguy hasn't died yet, so he'll probably be fine

3. They did it because Samuel Hayden said No

I don't think there's a better microcosm of Doomguy and VEGA's relationship than doomguy pulling up a picture of the BFG 10k and VEGA immediately understanding.

[ginkgo-phyta]

I'm back again 😅

Hopefully, I'm not the only person with this opinion, but how do you think Spencer would react if his significant other told him that they thought he looked hot with his bulletproof vest on? 👀

omg is this injured spencer request anon?? I NEED TO KNOW im so sorry if it's not tho, whoever you are thank you so much for coming back!! i love you with all my heart you should use a special emoji as like ur own lil signature! :D

okay so i wanted to try blurb(?) format but mmm okay not really cuz just a wall of text was stressing me out but this is def more informal than my other work (look no capital letters!) and because i love you so much i present two scenarios for you :P... i cant fight this feeling anymore guys he rlly is so hot in his vest im becoming my most feral self grrrrr RAH RAH ALRIGHT hope you enjoy, my love!

OKAY SO SPENCER REACTING TO YOU TELING HIM HE'S HOT IN HIS FBI VEST gn! reader, fluff, second scenario a little steamy in tone but nothing explicit just h*rny vibes, no other warnings

if you weren't a profiler: you'd never thought about it before- spencer in his bulletproof vest. sure, you knew that his job required him to go into sticky situations where the prospect of gunfire was imminent and he would have to wear proper equipment, but you never put two nd two together. you never even thought of a kevlar vest as something that could be hot...until you saw a picture of him wearing it.

"what the hell is that." you blurt out, voice serious with hints of concern.

"huh?" spencer's as clueless as ever, a little worried about your reaction. he was just showing you random photos his team members had taken over the years, all printed out for easy viewing courtesy of the ever-so-accommodating penolope garcia. someone had taken a pic of a beautiful lake where the bau had saved yet another victim, the sun dipping below the horizon line of pine trees, painting the sky purple and pink. "um...the sunset?" spencer was confused, "i guess maybe it was kinda a weird time to take a photo, but no one was hurt and we caught the unsub and the sky really did look-"

you cut off his rambling with a wave of your hand, eyes never leaving the photo in front of you, "no, no...what's that." you point to what you were talking about, a figure standing off to the side.

spencer takes a minute, becoming even more bewildered "...me?" in that moment your world changed.

"oh my god... "you whispered in a daze, firmly pulling the picture out of spencer's fingers and into your own, "what...what are you wearing?"

"honey what's wrong? it's just my bulletproof vest. i know it might look a little funny, but it, y'know, keeps me alive..." he scratches the back of his neck. a couple seconds of silence pass, but to spencer it feels excruciatingly long.

"spencer," you look at up at him deadpan "you look so fucking hot." to say your boyfriend was shocked would be an understatement.

he was absolutely blown away by your response, so much so that the way his face contorted looked borderline disgusted. "wha-what?? huh? what?" he clamored, eyes flitting over your face to find any sign you were joking.

"seriously, baby, you look so good. oh, my God!!" you almost shriek, gripping the picture tighter, the widest, dumbest grin pulling up your cheeks as you giggle like a schoolgirl.

spencer smiles at your reaction, still a little perplexed "you really think so?" the notion begins to sink into his bones, making him giddy.

you very enthusiastically nod your head, "are there any more pictures of you like this?" you rip the rest of the photos out of spencer's hands, scouring through them at light speed. out of nowhere, spencer laughs out loud, his nose scrunching in delight.

"i...don't know what to say. i'm flattered you think that," a wonderful blush shimmers over his cheeks, "but no i don't think there are. sadly." he playfully adds.

you stop all movements, slowly turning towards him, suspiciously calm. "well then," you grab your phone and suddenly stand up "looks like i'll just have to ask penelope for some!"

"wait! wait, no!" spencer calls after you as you start speed-walking away, your shirt barely escaping his fingertips. he yells out your name, his serious tone interrupted by a giggle of his own as he begins chasing you, "get back here!" he knows: garcia can never ever find out about this...

if you were a profiler: you had seen spencer don his FBI branded bulletproof vest hundreds of times over the years. although you had pined over him for years and were now finally in a relationship with him, seeing him like that didn't make you feel any type of way really. sure, you thought he looked strong and handsome, but most of the time you were too caught up in the case or situation at hand to focus on how he looked. until now. something had shifted in him in the last few months, not just with his ever-changing haircut, but within the way he held himself; more confident, more sure of himself, even more cocky, if you will. whatever it was, it drew your eyes to him in his tight little vest like a lightbulb draws in moths- instantly and continuously. it all came to a head when you caught the unsub responsible for drowning and resuscitating his victims until they couldn't be brought back to life. spencer dove into the lake with emily to apprehend the killer while you had helped the kid he had hostage reunite with his mother. you smiled at the scene in front of you, the teenager running into his mother's shaking arms, her holding him close in a tight embrace. another good ending, you thought to yourself before turning back to watch your fellow profilers make the arrest. suddenly, you mouth goes dry. there spencer reid stood; soaking wet, clothes sticking to his skin, chest rising and falling as he panted to catch his breath, his hand pushing his wet hair out of his face. and that stupid, goddamn kevlar vest. oh, fuck. the others walked away from the dock to situate everyone and themselves in respected vehicles that sat back on the road a few hundred feet away from where you currently were. as spencer moved to follow behind emily, hands trying to flick the water off of him, your gaze stopped him in his tracks. he stood there, a bit confused as to why you were walking towards him, seemingly entranced, instead of beelining behind everyone else.

he spoke out your name, but you remained silent, stopping just a couple feet away from him. you took him in one more time: the way his shirt became translucent, granting you with peeks of his skin; his sleeves rolled up, showing off his delicious forearms; the way his soaked pants choked his thick thighs. you became woozy with desire. spencer watched as your eyes dragged over his figure, drinking in every inch of his dripping body. "oh, baby..." you voice drawled out as soon as your gaze landed on his bulletproof vest, "you're absolutely soaking wet." spencer's eyebrows shot up his forehead at the suggestive twinkle in your timbre. you approached him further, chest just inches away from his. if he wasn't so intrigued by your reaction, he would have been a bit more cautious of lingering teammates. your hands came up to ghost over his vest, "did i ever tell you how good i think you look in this?" you looked up at him through your lashes.

spencer chuckled, "in the bulletproof vest?" you nodded in response, but spencer still couldn't really believe it. "uh, no, actually, you haven't." his eyes glinted at the way you bit your lip, his hands moving on their own accord to rest on your hips. you could feel droplets of water seep into the material and lick your skin, but you didn't give a rat's ass.

"well, you do." you whisper, hands wrapping around the back of his neck as you pull yourself up to press a kiss to his lips, "really, really good." your mouth moves enticingly with his.

"oh? is that so?" he whispers against your lips, diving back in, his fingers digging in your hips. he graciously kisses you for a moment before it dawns on him that you're both still at work- in an active crime scene, at that. "mmh, mmh!" he vocalizes between kisses as he tries to move his head back a smidge. his eyes peak open just enough to see if anyone else was around. your lips are addicting, rendering him unable to fully tell you to stop, unable to fully pull away himself. he's relieved when he spots no one. still, he know this is far from appropriate. spencer's hands move up your body to wrap around your wrists behind him, pulling them away from him and the same time he pulled away from you, "okay, okay!" he breathes out with a chuckle, "i believe you now" he tries to catch his bearings, but your pouting face causes him to laugh again

"spencerrrr," you groan at the loss of your beloved's kisses and he turns you around and pushes you towards the spot where the others vanished, walking behind you with his hands on your shoulders, your body held at an arm's distance.

"let's go, angel." his words brought out a hmph! from you. "we can do more of that later at home" he whispers, leaning in ever-so-slightly.

you turn your head back to get a glimpse of him, your eyes and smile equally wide with excitement, "can you bring the vest with you?!"

A/N: OKAYYYY lemme stop myself before things get filthy LOL do yall know which episode im referring to in the second scenario? that end scene will always get me my eye are GLUED to spencer the entire time GODDAMN. okay anyway i hope you liked this anon!!! pls tell me yalls thoughts <3

[txttletale]

can you talk more about what you like about hypnospace outlaw? i love that game but i thought it was more a cute fun time than an exceptional narrative, im surprised to see it as your top 5 game of all time

i guess the "main story", if you can call it that, is--i agree with you--not an exceptional narrative. but, like, i think the stories that matter in hypnospace outlaw are the individual stories of the people who make their little pages, and those stories are not only wonderful but conveyed incredibly. hypnospace outlaw is about seeing the digital footprints people leave, about learning about other people's passions, about exploring a social space and realizing there's all kinds of people in the world. it's a story that speaks to me a lot and my early experiences on the internet--there is such a powerful feeling of connection and intimacy with its characters achieved just through these little webpages, in little choices like how they decorated them, and there's so much attention put into all the little details of that. & the fact that you don't even get to interact with these people just makes it stronger to me, gives it this bittersweet melancholy edge (best encapsulated by the unbelievably good theme song).

it makes me remember being a kid online and making my lame little forum posts but also makes me reminisce on my time online now, on what someone might think of me if they only saw my blog. it speaks to these asymmetrical strange moments of connection, of finding some weird website about frogs someone's maintained since 1997. it's more than just nostalgia for a specific aesthetic or moment--my early internet experiences happened long after the age of neocities that HO is riffing on directly--but about the power of the internet to be wonderful and strange and stupid and funny and infuriating, to put you in contact with strange and magical people and also the dumbest motherfuckers alive. there is such a tenderness and love on part of the game for each and every character in it, from the confused old grandma to the edgy teen to the homophobic kid.

this is a very rambly answer but hopefully this helps convey why i think it's a top 5 game for me !

[cricketwrites]

ASL Bros when S/O puts a flower in their hair

HCs under the cut!

Portgas D. Ace:

-Okay first off

-You need to literally drag him away for even a short time of just “chill tf out babe”

-You get 10 minutes if you’re lucky before he gets restless

-But you can also probably convince him to stay a biiiit longer

-Just make sad eyes at him he can’t resist that for long

-Probably gets like really confused at first, then gets the biggest dumbest grin imaginable

-Strikes a pose and asks if you think it looks good on him

-Then laughs because honestly he probably couldn't take himself seriously

-Grabs a flower and puts it in your hair too

-That way you match <3

-1000/10 Ace marry me pls

The environment was serene, as you and Ace had finally had some time to yourselves. No pirates, no fights, just the two of you. Life was fun, full of adventure, and there was always something going on, but sometimes it was nice to just slow down. In this moment, it was just Ace and the love of his life.

You and Ace were enjoying the lush greenery of the island they had docked at for a few days. It had so many fields of flowers, and you decided to take Ace to one. The day was warm but not overbearing, and all of the flowers around you created a serene little world, just the two of you. 

Ace jumped in surprise when you gently pushed his hat off of his head and replaced it with an orange flower. He laughed, gently shaking his head.

“What was that for?” He asked, chuckling at the cuteness of the scenario.

“Because I felt like it.” You smiled, tilting your head in faux innocence.

“Fine.” Ace gained that competitive look you often saw in a fight, but all he did was grab a nearby flower and place it behind your ear.

“There, now we match.” He smirked, placing a kiss on your cheek and pulling you down to lay on the grass with him. He couldn’t be more in love than he was at that moment. Life with pirates was always fun and exciting, but maybe, just maybe, slowing down and enjoying the flowers was fun too.

Not that he’d ever admit that. That was just for him to know.

Monkey D. Luffy:

-Legitimately tries to eat it.

-You have to explain what you tried to do

-”Luffy you cANT EAT FLOWERS-”

-After you explain, he gets a huge grin

-Probably thinks it's really cute but doesnt entirely understand why

-Very chill go with the flow bf

Luffy always drags you off of the ship when you dock at a new island, literally the second you dock. Normally he would just rocket himself off, but you had to explain to him that it hurt, so now he waits while rambling to you about all of the things he might see, growing more outlandish the longer he talks.

How silly he was, this captain of yours.

When you saw a field of flowers in the distance, you tugged on his arm.

“Hey, Luffy! I wanna go check out that field!” You said, pointing in the field’s direction.

Luffy looked confused. “Eh? Why? Is there anything special there?” He sounded genuinely curious, just that he didn’t understand.

You giggled. “There’s flowers there! They’ll probably be pretty.”

Luffy shrugged. “Ok, sure.” He still didn’t entirely understand, but he was willing to check it out to make you happy. Maybe he’d even find something interesting there too!

The field was as pretty as you’d thought. You grabbed a red flower and placed it on Luffy’s straw hat.

Luffy grabbed it, observing it, then attempting to put it in his mouth. Luckily, you caught his wrist. “No!” You said, giggling, “You don’t eat it. I thought it looked nice.”. Of course he’d try to eat it.

Luffy nodded. “Oh, okay!” He said, placing it back on his hat. He leaned down and grabbed a different one, placing it on your head. “Now you have one too!”

You really loved him, dorkiness and all.

Sabo:

-Sabo.exe has stopped working.

-Why did you do that? ._.

-Not mad, but very confused at first

-Give him a sec to process

-Thinks you are probably the cutest being to ever exist

-Feels so lucky to have you <3

-His life can get really busy so you gotta be patient with this one

-But he always makes it up to you

Sabo marry me pls

Sabo hadn’t quite told you where he would be taking you, just that it was a surprise, and he was sure you’d love it. As he led you by the hand, you were getting to an area with less and less city. Where was he taking you?

“Come on Sabo, you can’t even give me a hint?” You asked, playfully groaning. “I’m dying of anticipation!”

Sabo laughed. “Nope, no hints. I won’t be swayed.” He shook his head with a satisfied smile. He must be proud of whatever he was gonna show you.

You didn’t have to wait much longer. A bit outside of the town, he stopped at a beautiful field of flowers of all colors and sizes.

You were amazed. “Wow! This is amazing… thank you.” Sabo grinned. “I told you that you would like it. I’m really glad you do.”

You bent down, picking up a blue flower and putting it on his hat, by his goggles. You smiled, pecking his cheek. “It suits you.” Sabo’s face turned bright red. He felt overwhelmed with happiness. Sometimes, with his hectic schedule, he was worried about not being the best partner to you. He always tried to make it up to you whenever he could, and he felt blessed to have someone as patient as you by his side.

The ring in his pocket felt a little less heavy than before.

Reposted from @thatwritercricket

AAAAA my first request! Hopefully you all enjoyed, I tried to keep it gender neutral <3

Requests are open, here are the rules for requests! My DMs are also ope

I love you all and hope you have a good day!

~ Cricket

[soulfulazrael]

My Hellaverse Religions and Marriages. Or how my Asperger made up some odd worldbuilding over the dumbest reason imaginable.

We all know this shot. We all hate this shot (well... I do)

And it's for one, big reason... what the hell are marriages in Hell? Well. I was wondering that too and honestly the answer is very simple... Who gives a shit? Viv wanted a contrived story with forced marriage where Moxxie looks like a total bitch so she did it as well as she could and since she could not do it well it came out how it did.

But it did made me think at least. What would marriages in Hell look like? And that lead me to a downward spiral of thinking up in a few hours how it works and why it works. And here is the result. Ladies and gentleman and all the inbetweens (I don't judge) I present my first rewrite post which I mostly do for myself as a note for future in case dementia catches me like it did with my grandparents. One is dead, the other is dying, but enough about my happy life. Let's get into autistic rambling.

So, before we get to the marriage system I have in mind, first let's delve into another thing. God. Or in this case. Deities. As in my version of HB/HH I write about in my AU there are several of them. All of which are different High authority figures of which the main ones are five and I will name all of them: First one is Lucifer

Who in this version is... not as nice. In fact he is very, VERY cruel being. One that has little qualms about lives of anyone else. A being of Chaos from the times of the Rebellion in Heaven which he lead against God after he corrupted humanity to prove to The Almighty of his superiority, of that he is deserving of love much greater than mortals. Cast out from Heaven alongside all those that took side with him.

Now in Hell he embodies Pride that shaped the top layer of Hell. He is a Deity that preaches ultimate freedom. He preaches the idea of that you deserve all that you want. That every feeling, every desire you feel is correct and that you alone are deserving of those no matter what anyone says, no matter who it hurts. All that is important is you. That is the crux of those who follow him. Hedonists, narcissists, cruel, chaotic beings of pure selfishness who believe in righteousness of their desires and standing up against any authority that wants to keep them away from fulfilling their dreams and when all dreams become reality, there is no other outcome than Chaos which Lucifer adores.

They are called Light Takers. For Lucifer is one who brings light and those who follow him, take said light and all that they want.

That is Lucifer and now let's get to the Deity right under him that sides with him more so than the other one, another creature of Chaos (also be mindful that this is just short summary of those things, I can go more in depth about each one in other posts). Satan:

I don't have a better image as my idea of how he looks is pretty different. I imagine him as a centaur like being with a lower body similar to a bull, more human like torso, a head similar to one on this app with mighty wings and 4 arms. A brutal, relentless deity, one who's philosophy is to spread death and prepare for fight against the Heaven. To drown the world in the blood of his enemies and for the bodies and blood to rise so high so that he can approach the Heaven's gates.

His followers are mostly Imps. Many of them sharing to lesser or greater extent this philosophy of slaughter. It gives them meaning to kill and make their own trail of Blood as they follow in the hoove steps of the Lord of Slaughter. Followers of Blood they are called. A numerous force of berserkers devoted to mindless murder and Chaos.

With all this Chaos there has to be a balance point though right? You'd be correct. As on the opposite end of the Chaos spread by Lucifer and Satan is The Lord Governor:

Lucifuge Rofocale. He is in my version very similar to this depiction, although he very rarely smiles. He is known also as Bitter Governor for his rivalry with Lucifer in which he is mostly ignored by the latter as he tries to gain control over the Chaos of Hell.

He is the creature who values Order more so than anything. He is the Lawmaker. He is the lord of Laws that he writes into his Great Book, many laws there are, some of which contradict each other, some forgotten, other irrelevant. All his. He is the cruelty of order and subjugation incarnate. His name itself Lucifuge is one that was given to him after rebellion in which he took side of Lucifer in order to create a perfect society of his own. A society that was never to be. He who runs from Light for he was a Throne Angel of greater light than any other, a Light so strong he could never know even a smallest shadow. Light that he hated above all and could never fully rid himself off of it's taint.

When he came to Hell his Pride alongside Lucifer's shaped the Entire Ring. Lucifer controls the Central parts where Pentagram City is located and Lucifuge controls outer rings of Pride where his 5 towers on borders of Pride spreading to the blood sky surround the Chaos of Lucifer. His desire of control made manifest. A control he spreads with his Emissaries. Those who follow him and his laws faithfully and spread them with unmatched zeal. And his most faithful and powerful servant is the 4th of the Main Deities. The Silent King of all Ars Goetia.

King Baal. His version in my AU is based on this picture. A creature with lower body of a Spider and torso of a man with head of a King with long hair at the top. Which ever direction he looks, his face changes shape, if to his right it takes form of a cat and left is the frog. Among the deities he alongside Satan were born in Hell and were since time of their Hell's manifestation bitter rivals and his beloved is Queen of Gluttony Beelzebub which is often a target of mockery. A spider who beds a bug instead of eating it, but no care to those words are given, no words... Only silence. Pride was originally meant to be his as it would embody his silence, but it was not to be as the Fall happened and Pride was born from the quiet grounds.

He was named an Ars Goetia by Lucifuge to whom he pledged allegiance to in Silent Promise and ever since his invisible web spread across skies of Pride, woven from threads attached to every life among Ars Goetia and to cut it is to be a Heretic condemned to suffering at the hand of Silent King. Baal's Faithful who are his followers are mostly Ars Goetia. All believing in Hell's security to be utmost priority. To make it safe at any means necessary. To make sure that Hell will be eternal and all who fall into it's flames will never escape it's torment. He is the one who keeps the Ars Goetia in check to follow the laws Lord Lucifuge laid out. For maybe side of Chaos has numbers and ferocity, but Order has power and stability.

A balance that is most crucial to never ending conflict festered by the most enigmatic and possibly most terrible of the Five. Mephistopheles.

Who's looks are as everchanging as interpretations of how he looks. A Demon who fooled the world into believing he was, but a made up Demon in a story about Faust. Always cloaked in shadows creature, that despite looking a lot of times like the most basic denizen of Hell, is anything, but. As his nature is a mystery to all who inhabit it. A creature of Darkness that remembers the time of the first words that is alien to both Heaven and Hell. One that gave Hell it's currency made of Souls it caught with contracts they make on earth. A Creature that always maintains the balance of both sides. Making sure there is never a conclusion to this bitter conflict and flames of Discord never fade. Something that is cherished by his Brethren in Dark.

To be Mephisto's Brethren in Dark is to commune and listen to Mephisto's words. You are what you are. There is no change to that. So live your life as you see fit. Make of your life anything you want. Be it for order or chaos. Be it for your desire or duty. What is important is to know who you are and to believe in his words. It is to be on the side of yours and his and all that you must have will come to you, but the price will have to be paid, but it does not have to come from you now has it? No... You use others as much as you are used. You know that very well. You always will. For you are rotten, but so is everything else. So is that so bad?

There are many other deities. Such as King Paimon, by many considered as one of the if not the mightiest among Kings. A being who's promise of seeing his Labyrinth makes many shudder at the mere thought. Or the Sins who's patronage seek those who live on their rings. But the choice is up to the Hellborn... aside from mostly Hellhounds, who mostly only reside and do labor for the Beelzebub. A Cerberus insect of endless hunger.

But there is one more path. On the side of neutrality is also another side. Hell. To listen to the will of Hell.

Listeners of Hell are those who feel the very wind among the bloody streets. To know intimately the desires of the ground you walk on. To serve Hell as it's listener and to reinforce it's will. This is path for those who seek a different path from all other deities. But to do so is to give all that you are to the home you have. Not to protect, but understand it. Breathe with it and to be a true part of it. Closer than many others.

These are all the paths Hellborn can... or rather have to choose. Because atheism is not possible in this realm. Hellborn have to believe in something otherwise it means they are a traitor to the Hell itself. Whatever one believes in it is up to the Hellborn in question. But the choice it is one Hellborn MUST make.

Now... after this little mythology lesson where does this lead in terms of marriages? Well. The marriage in itself is also a deal between deities. Each side has their own contract that has to be signed by the priest of their respective deity. And each priest is of different kind. Emissary is a political for the most part. Mephisto's Brethren could be of any kind. A soldier of Baal. Hedonistic royal of Lucifer. Berserker of Satan. If both sides worship same deity it means less issues, but both contracts are still required.

Both sides need to sign their respective contract and then place their cut hands on those contracts as they are connected by their blank sides. Letting their blood seep into them as both of them touch them. Letting their blood, believes and word to connect them forevermore, for them both to be servants together. That is unless one has a change of faith which may require redoing of the process at the chance of being shunned by everyone around. For it is a shame to be someone to turns away from their God.

So yeah... This is how I would personally write certain part of Mythology of Hell. I know I did not elaborate on certain other things like Paimon or Sins, but I think this is a good enough of a starting point to the mythology I want to make with 3 sides here. Chaos, Order and Neutrality. All with their own strengths and weaknesses. All with their own stories and people who worship them. All with their own traditions, beliefs and personalities... All of it... because I was iffy by the fucking Exs and Ohs priest. I need serious mental help. This is just sad to look at. Then again if you read this far, I guess we all lost here. Or maybe you liked it. If so then please leave a comment or something. I cherish those. And maybe think of who you would choose to follow.

[inumaaaki]

“FOR YOU, I WOULD.”

character: toge Inumaki

wc: ~2700 words

cw: none, mild angst to fluff.

INAMUKI TOGE⸻”BY YOUR SIDE, THERE IS NO BETTER PLACE TO BE.”

toge would be, simply put, the best boyfriend you’ll ever have. as we all know, he has a habit of putting others first. and that’s when it comes to strangers. so, when it comes down to his lover, you’re in for x1000 caring intensified.

he fell for you first. it wasn’t love at first sight per se, but he couldn’t deny the immediate attraction at first glance. you were radiant, a first year with very little experience handling curses. but even despite all the dangers and tragedies you faced, you always seemed to hold a positive outlook.

when you first met him, you didn’t know about his curse. You had never seen him before. you were rushing to meet yuuji for your daily practice session. turning the corner, you bumped into something.

immediately two hands reached out to steady you. Startled, you looked up. to see the cutest boy you’ve ever laid eyes on. with the prettiest, purple eyes.

you rushed out your apologies, rambling on and on like you always did when you were nervous. “oh I am sorry I wasn’t watching where I was going⸻”

“shake shake.”

you blinked twice. salmon? what does that mean? and then it clicked. his uniform, he was a student. he didn’t look that much older than you. oh! a second year!

proud at your genius, you smile brightly. “oh! you must be a second year! I only know yuuta and I heard there’s a panda in your class, whom I would very much like to meet, but I didn’t have any chance to come say hi because of gojo-sensei!"

“he keeps our hands so full. i’ve only been here for two weeks and whew the curses I’ve seen. anyways, what’s your name? we should definitely hang out some time!”

when you were only met with his silence, you felt heat beginning to crawl into your cheeks.

he looked at you, for a moment, and you felt his eyes drop a little bit, as if in sadness.

“oh, I- sorry⸻.” you mumbled, with your head dropped walking past him.

that is until his hand wraps around your wrist, stopping you in your tracks. you look back towards him, a question on your face.

he seemed hesitant then, a first. then his response came in form of him unzipping his hoodie with his free hand, revealing to you his gorgeous face. he was even more beautiful than he seemed. that’s the first thing you thought before you noticed the marks around his mouth.

he smiled apologetically, and you felt like the dumbest person in the world.

the inumaki clan, of course. salmon. of course.

slowly, you turn to face him, placing your hand gently on his that was still holding your wrist.

you squeeze his hand gently. a small apology. but also because with the way he was looking at you, you were left speechless.

after that encounter, you ask megumi about him. he tells you how he communicates using rice ball ingredients, but also how they all learned sign language for him.

it doesn’t strike you as something difficult to do, so you set out on learning whatever you can in whatever time you have before you see him again.

it all started from there. the next time you saw him, you thought you were signing words, but you messed up the whole thing. his genuine laughter at your funny gestures rung through the open field, but his hand had come to land on your shoulder, smiling at you. thank you. you can clearly tell what he was trying to say.

you shared phone numbers, and that’s how you discovered his amazing personality. toge was funny, so funny, and he was not afraid to show you how he felt.

toge wasn’t shy with you. whether in texts or with how he acted with you in public. how he slung his arm over your shoulder, or leaned over you when there was something you wanted to show him. at first, you had assumed his physical touches were his way of communicating because of the lack of speech. however, it took you only to see how he acted with Maki or anyone else to immediately turn down that theory.

he was always turning up, always seeking you out. He’d text you during lunch breaks to join him and ask you to train with him. (much to yuuji’s dismay at first, to have lost his training partner. but the pink-haired boy was a hopeless romantic who realized what was going on from the first glance and backed away.)

you two grew close, forming quite a special bond. but it was still a friendship. to him, perhaps, you thought. but to you?

the way your heart did a mini leap when you laid eyes on him. How you’d clutch your phone all the time and jump to check it whenever the ping sounded. hoping it was him that texted. and the stupid, ear-to-ear smile that you would sport whenever it was him.

both of you were obvious, however, to how you felt. and you, how could you not see how much he cherished you??? with the way his eyes softened upon the mere mention of your name. panda pointed it out once, teasing him non-stop about his crush on you, which earned him a stern, “stop talking,” from his silver-haired friend.

later on that night, panda had burst into toge’s room, a hand clutched dramatically to his chest. “you cursed me!” he feigned a swoon, “and it took hours for its effects to subdue, all for (y/n), my friend! We must get you two together.”

and that was how his five-step plan to woo you started.

however, unbeknownst to them, you were sent on a mission that day. where you encountered a grade one curse, where all that should have been there was a flock of grade four curses.

you tried your best, you really did, but you were severely overpowered. before collapsing, however, you were able to send out a request for aid.

toge and panda were immediately notified, their little gossip session turning upside down once they received the summons on their phone.

toge had never felt this stressed. he knew you were capable, but even he would have trouble facing a grade one curse on his own. he sat in the back of the car, legs bouncing up and down with both fists clutched so tightly he was sure his fingers would leave bruises. but he did not care, you were probably hurt, and maybe, probably…no, he refused to even think it

and this stupid driver, can’t he go any faster? he thought bitterly, and in his anger, almost spoke out the words.

panda’s hand on his bouncing leg stopped him. he snapped his head to the left, looking at him.

panda was worried about him, it was clear as day. “She’ll be fine.” he finally said.

toge’s breath was shaky on its way out.  

and they had arrived just in time. his eyes had barely registered what it was seeing, the curse, crushing you in its slimy, disgusting hand⸻your face, bloody and unconscious ⸻

“let her go.” his yell was filled with fear, and anger. the next moment you were in his hands, he caught you before you could fall.

toge was seeing red.

“die.”

the curse burst into flames and disappeared, a grade one curse dealt with in mere seconds, before it could even realize what was going on.

panda stared on at the scene, at how his friend set down the girl he loves down with shaky hands. at how softly he cradled her face, a lone tear making its way down his cheek.

and toge…how he wished he could call out to you, he wanted to say your name, he wanted to so badly. to comfort you. to apologize for not being here sooner. for not murdering the higher ups who stupidly messed up your mission.

that’s when he made a vow to always protect you. he hated it, how helpless he felt just sitting here, waiting to arrive to shoko. he hated how his hands were stained red because it was your blood. you, the most precious, bright and innocent thing in his world. the person who made his curse gnaw at him at every waking moment. because he wanted to be a full person for you, he wanted to give you the best, he wanted to say your name, to speak words of love into your skin, to tell you how he felt under a starry night as you gazed up at him in those beautiful (e/c) eyes of yours.

but now, as he held your shaking body in his arms, he was ready to lay down his life just to see you open your eyes again. and that’s when he closed his own, making a prayer to whoever was listening.

***

you opened your eyes to a wooden ceiling. a blurry vision greeted you, but it was slowly improving with every passing moment.

groaning, you tried to remember how you’d gotten here. you remembered a mission, a bunch of grade four curses that you were sent to deal with, and then⸻

oh

it had come out of nowhere. you had immediately sent out for help, but that’s only just before it had gotten to you. it was impossibly fast, and it had been toying with you. If it had decided to deal with you at once, you suspected you wouldn’t have been alive by now.

you wondered who had saved you for a brief moment, but you quickly shook the thought away, realising your main priority was to get up and start training. you had to get stronger to avoid further accidents like this.

you also wondered, if toge had been worried about you, or if he’d come to visit you. you cursed these thoughts that were never ending.

but your answer came faster than you thought. you’d barely sat up, when you noticed him.

he had pulled out a chair just next to your bed. His hair was ruffled, as if he hadn’t brushed it in a while. His head was drooped low, soft breathes escaping his lips. but most importantly⸻

oh god how did you not notice before?

his hand holding yours on the mattress. your fingers intertwined.

you flushed; eyes fixated on the sight. your heart beat loudly against your chest. you suspected, if you had been connected to a monitor, it would definitely had alerted the nurses with how fast your heart was beating.

“toge-kun…” you whispered, eyes softening as you looked at him. what did you do to deserve a person like him in your life?

you startled however when he woke up, purple eyes slowly fluttering open until they met yours.

he looked at you for a moment, mouth hanging open.

before his eyes widened and he pulled you in into a bone-crushing hug.

you hugged back with all the strength you could muster. The warmth that enveloped you, the peace he summoned. It was the best feeling, a feeling you were growing drunk on.

you don’t know how long you stayed like that, you didn’t want to pull away, neither did he, it seemed, but after some time, you knew you had to.

you slowly pulled away, but your faces were inches apart. Your eyes met his lips, his breath fanning your face. they then travelled to his eyes, to find them glossed over with tears.

his hand reached out to cup your cheek, and you closed your eyes, leaning in to his touch.

“toge-kun,” you sighed in bliss. he had you, body and soul. you loved him with all you were. you suddenly felt this drive to show him, to love him, to tell him.

with both your hands your grabbed his hand, glancing at him before you placed a feather-kiss on his knuckles.

his eyes softened. a blush cutely adorning his pale cheeks. smiling, he took hold of your hand and did the same to you.

you couldn’t help but smile in return, both at his actions and at the heat travelling to his ears. was it possible, that you had the same effect on him as he did you?

it didn’t need another thought, you slowly parted your lips, “toge…i-I lov⸻”

his palm pressed itself on your mouth, silencing you. He frowned at you, shaking his head.

confused, and a little hurt, you obeyed, watching in confusion as he pulled out his phone.

his eyes narrowed as he scrolled on his screen for a moment, before a satisfied “ah” left his lips once he found what he was looking for.

his finger hovered above the screen, hesitating.

if you thought he was blushing before, he now looked as red as a tomato bro.

before you could think any further, a determined look set on his face. he pressed on the screen.

and whatever you had expected, this wasn’t it.

his voice played out, but not in the way you only heard it ever saying rice ball ingredients, no, it was his beautiful voice speaking, speaking to you.

“i thought a lot about how I am going to do this,” the recording started, “and this seems like the only way.”

you felt tears welling up in your eyes. you knew the strain saying one word had on him, to do this? it must have been excruciating, and he must have gone somewhere deserted, so he wouldn’t risk hurting anyone.

the recording ended there, but on his phone, you could see two more, each barely a few seconds long. you knew. he must have had to stop to take his cough medicine.

without realizing, you grabbed his hand, looking at him with so much love.

he pressed again.

silence for a few moments, then him taking a deep breath “……(y/n)”

treacherous tears spilled from your eyes, and you laughed, connected your forehead to his. closing your eyes as you continued to listen.

“…(y/n), my (y/n).”

“thank you for coming into my life, (y/n).”

the recording stopped.

his gentle touch on your chin made you open your eyes.

you startled. he was so close, one breath and your lips would touch. and he was looking at your lips, and you couldn’t help but look at his as he played the last recording. his lips moved in sync, and for one magical moment, it was as if he was speaking them to you.  

“(y/n)…I love you.”

you smiled like an idiot, the smile he loves so much. laughing through your tears that were now flowing freely.

in another world, maybe you would’ve been able to talk, to share discussions and hear your name running off his tongue every day. but that other world wasn’t something you were looking for, or wasn’t even something you wanted.

because this couldn’t have been any closer to perfection. It was perfection. this moment, as he finally leaned in and pressed his lips to yours. as you kissed in a declaration of love, a promise to each other, like a warm blanket warming you during a cold night.

you kissed until you had to pull away to breathe, but he was already chasing after your lips. he captured them again with ease, his lips dancing with yours again. you couldn’t help but sigh in contentment as you wrap your hands around his neck. he pulls you closer by the waist until your chests are pressing together.

finally, after what seemed like a lifetime to you, but also what felt like too soon, you both pull away, gasping for air.

you met his eyes. his oh so beautiful eyes that looked at you like you were a miracle. his miracle.

uou chuckled; joyous laugh full of adoration. “you just had to say it first, didn’t you.”

he nodded, a sly smile on his lips.

“salmon.” he says.

you rubbed your nose with his, unable to do anything but smile as you admire him.

you peck his lips, meeting his eyes once more.

“I love you too. my cute salmon.”

a/n: can you tell that i am in love with this man.