#this was done to cheer up my friend after he had surgery

[puck-luck]

Forever yearning for a jealous, dominant Luke Hughes. I mean spitting in your mouth, edging, mirror sex, etc. I need the filthy, down bad luke.

Scenario: maybe you’re becoming close with one of the other players (completely innocent-just forming a friendship) but Luke doesn’t see it as that way…

👉🏻👈🏻

warnings (in no particular order): spit(!!), jealousy, dom!luke, edging, mirror sex, one (1!) slap to the face just for the enjoyment of my friend jo, spanking, drinking (technically underage hiii luke turn 21 already stop being lame), beating yourself up, pet names and nicknames as FUCK (always bro do y’all even know me), road head, face fucking, unprotected p in v, dare i say breeding kink, implied subspace, allusion to size kink (probably established size kink to be fair), I THINK THAT’S IT BUT I’M NOT SURE! pairing: luke hughes x fem!reader summary: the one when luke gets jealous at the bar and doles out a bit of a punishment (code: luke is insecure about his performance on the ice, so when his gf starts talking with another teammate who is her friend, he gets jealous and feels like he has to prove himself by making her feel good, but he’s still a dom bc HOTTTT) wc: 6416

The Devils’ last game of the season was at home this year. There was no chance that they would make the playoffs and Jack was out in Colorado for his shoulder surgery, plus Luke’s parents weren’t able to make it from Michigan for his final rookie game. He was depending on you to be there, so there you were. You were cheering, you were yelling at the officials when they missed a call, you were laughing at Luke when he took a trademarked Hughes spill on the ice with barely anyone around him. Yeah, you were disappointed at the end of the game when the Islanders won (and it wasn’t even close), but it was just one game. It wasn’t the end of the world. It was a disappointment, but it wasn’t life-changing.

Luke, however, was much more upset with their performance when you met up with him after the game. He drove the two of you to the bar where the team was meeting for one last celebration before the off-season and he tried, he really did, to keep his complaints inside. He was stewing, just letting it well up inside of him and fester in the silence between you, until it spilled over.

“It should have been a better game,” Luke finally said, the harsh edge in his tone rubbing you in all the wrong ways. “We could’ve done more. If I had just–”

“Lu, baby,” you interrupted, voice soft. “It wasn’t your fault.”

“I was out there the longest, other than Jake,” Luke argued. “They depend on me and I let them down.”

“You were only on the ice for one goal, Lu. You couldn’t have done anything about at least the other three.”

Your statement was not something he wanted to hear. Your boyfriend, sweet as he was, always saw the best in everyone else and the worst in himself. Where he could have been blaming Brendan for the loss, since Brendan was on the ice for three of the four goals, he was instead blaming himself. He was never one to hold a grudge against his teammates or his friends or his family, which was part of the reason why you were so in love with him.

He grunted instead of giving you a real response, but you knew it was coming from a place of knowing you’re right but still feeling hurt.

“I love you,” you told him, just a reminder that his performance would never affect your affection towards him. 

“I love you too,” Luke replied, and you two fell back into silence. It was less tense this time, but his shoulders were still tense and he was frowning, almost pouting. He was so pretty, even now, but you hated how this expression marred his face.

When you pulled up to the bar, you were met by Luke’s teammates. While some of the men had gone home after the game, it was mostly the ones who had families. You knew their wives and girlfriends would have encouraged them to go out with the team rather than stay home with the kids, but you understood. If Luke had wanted to go straight home after the game, you would’ve gone with him and cuddled him until you fell asleep.

“Do you want to get out and get me a drink, baby, while I find parking?” Luke asked, always so considerate. 

“Yeah,” you agreed easily, leaning over the center console to peck his lips before you left the car. 

Waiting outside the entrance of the bar, Nico and John smiled as you got out of the car and walked over to them. You hugged each of them before entering the bar, Nico walking in ahead of you and John following you with a hand on your back. 

It didn’t mean anything to you or to John, but when Luke watched John guide you into the bar before he drove away to search for a parking spot, something sharp and green poked at his heart.

Luke finally made his way into the bar about ten minutes after you walked in, and your face had lit up when you saw him like it had been much longer. He didn’t see you at first, so you had the chance to watch him scan the room. His brow was furrowed as he scanned each person’s features. You knew that he was trying to spot you without looking for the other boys at first, but it was proving difficult with how crowded the room had become.

Timo appeared at his side and patted Luke’s shoulder in greeting. Luke talked to him for a minute before Timo pointed your way. Luke’s face split with a smile when he saw you and he gave Timo a pat before beelining towards you.

You looped your arms around Luke’s neck when he joined you, leaning up on your tiptoes to kiss him.

“Gross,” Nico complained from next to you. “It’s only been a few minutes since you’ve seen each other.”

“You’re not in love,” Luke replied, snarky and sarcastic like he tended to be when it wasn’t just the two of you. He then turned to you. “Where’s my drink?”

“What a priority,” you teased, rolling your eyes at him. He pinched your side. “I sent Johnny to go get it.”

Luke’s expression changed for a split second before he schooled his features. You wouldn’t have noticed it if you weren’t so in tune with his emotions, experience that comes only after years of dating a person. 

You let it go, knowing that it can’t be too important, or Luke would have said something. He knew you were friends with guys on the team. After being around them for almost a year, having moved out here with Luke at the start of his rookie year, it was bound to happen. Plus, Luke wasn’t the jealous type. He knew that you loved him and you’d love him forever, saying yes in a second if he chose to propose.

But to him, there was something about the way you said “Johnny” instead of John. It was that and John’s hand on your back as he guided you into the bar, on top of an already hard night, that had Luke questioning himself.

“I asked him to get you a rum and coke,” you said, tilting your head up to poke Luke’s nose with your own. “Is that okay?”

“It sounds good, thank you,” Luke replied. 

You resume conversation with Nico, turning to face him but staying tucked into Luke’s side. He had a hand on your hip and the other accepted the drink that John handed Luke when he returned. He nursed it quietly for a while, engaging in conversation here and there, but mostly just enjoying his time with his friends. 

The game was the last time that his whole team would be together like that, but this night out was the last time that his team, his friends, would be together in the way that mattered. Even if no one was traded, if no one changed in the slightest (except Jack, coming back from injury), things still wouldn’t be quite the same. It wouldn’t be his second year, his presence wouldn’t be new or exciting. He would have to try harder, do better, and be consistent to show that he wasn’t just an example of beginner’s luck.

He clutched you a little tighter to his side at that thought. He was comforted by the way that you melted into him, moving to lean back against his chest. Your hand covered his and the other polished off your drink. He took the empty cup from you and kissed your cheek before pulling away to toss your cup, and his, in the trash can behind him.

When he returned, he was taken aback by the sight before him.

You had stepped forward and were carding your fingers through John’s curls and Luke saw red before he saw the thoughtful look on your face. John had just said to you and Nico that he thought his hair was getting too long, too unruly. You didn’t agree– it was a good length, the curls were just settling into their shapes.

“I don’t think you should cut it, John,” you were saying before Luke grabbed your other wrist and yanked you towards him. “Luke!” You exclaimed, startled by the movement.

“Time to go,” Luke announced, loud enough that the other boys could hear. He clutched your wrist, not your hand, your wrist, and pulled you along as he stomped toward the exit.

“Luke, what is going on?” You asked, voice resounding in your ears like it’s much louder than it actually is. 

Luke kept walking like he didn’t even hear you, pushing through the door and leading you down the block to the car. He opened your door for you and helped you in, but he slammed it shut once you were buckled into your seat. He rounded the car and opened his own door, glaring at you in a passing glance before settling into the driver’s seat.

“Lu,” you implored, pressing your hands against the top of your thighs. 

When he didn’t reply, you tried again.

“Babe, talk to me–”

“I don’t want you to speak unless you’re spoken to,” Luke said. He refused to look at you. “You think you can touch John’s hair the way you touch mine? You’ll let him guide you into the bar the way I would? I’m not enough for you, huh, baby?”

You blinked, suddenly shifting up to sit a little straighter. Luke, your sweet angel Luke, the baby of his family who would never hurt a fly, who avoided hockey fights at every cost, had flipped his switch.

“Answer me. I asked you a question.”

“No, sir,” you said. Your eyes flickered down to where Luke’s knuckles were white with how hard he was gripping the steering wheel. You inhaled sharply as you made eye contact with the veins decorating the back of his hand.

“No?” Luke repeated, mocking. “I’m not enough for you?”

“No! Lu, you’re more than enough, you know you’re the only one I need.” Your words came out scrambled and you tripped over them. 

Luke clicked his tongue, disapproval written all over his face. “Can’t even speak, can you?” He scoffed, reached down with one hand, and popped the button on his jeans. “Let’s put your mouth to a better use until you can find your words.”

“You’re driving,” you pointed out, casting a worried look at the road ahead of you.

“It wasn’t a question,” Luke threw you a glance. He looked back at the road, then back to you, this time holding your gaze. He cocked his head to the side, eyes softening for a moment. “Was it?”

“No,” you breathed out. 

“Good girl.” A smile spread over Luke’s face and he turned back to the road. “Get to it.”

You clenched your thighs together and unbuckled your seatbelt so you could twist towards Luke and lean over the center console. You reached out to unzip his pants, but he knocked your hands away.

“I didn’t say use your hand. I said,” he paused, grabbing your hair and tilting your head up so your eyes met his, “Use your mouth.”

The noise that escaped you was involuntary. You moved forward that extra inch and carefully took Luke’s zipper in your mouth, dragging it down. His boxers were revealed by the action, but that was the extent of it. 

“Come on,” Luke encouraged, growing impatient. What you couldn’t see from your position was the smug tilt of his mouth, knowing there was no way to get his cock out of his pants with just your mouth. “Take it out.”

“Can’t,” you whimpered.

“Oh, you can’t?” Luke mocked, feigning sympathy. “Poor baby needs my help, yeah?”

You nodded and hummed an agreement.

Luke’s grip tightened on your hair and he gave it a sharp tug. “Use your manners.”

“Please, Lu, help me,” you conceded.

“Help you what?”

“Help me take your cock out so I can suck you, please, sir.” Your voice was close to breaking, you were itching to get your mouth on him and make him feel good. 

Luke obliged, revealing himself to you. You opened your mouth and he pumped himself twice just to tease you before slapping the lip of his cock on the flat of your tongue. He fed you his cock, returning his hand to your hair when you had taken as much of his length in your mouth as you could. He gathered your hair into a messy ponytail with his one hand, the other still on the wheel, and began to guide your head up and down. 

You gagged when he guided you to his base, nose touching the fabric of his boxers around his cock, but the groan he let out made the discomfort worth it. It was low and desperate, just pure relief.

“Wanna fuck your mouth,” Luke breathed out, pulling you up so just the tip of his cock remained in your mouth. 

You hollowed your cheeks and sucked, swiping your tongue over his slit and relishing in the taste of his precum in your mouth. 

He moaned aloud, the sound seeming to echo throughout the car. You could feel your heartbeat in your fingertips. You let out a sigh, suddenly overwhelmed with contentment for your situation. Luke was perfect. He was the perfect boyfriend, whether he was his soft and cuddly self or this dominant version of him that wasn’t afraid to tell you what to do, to communicate what he wanted. 

“Would if I weren’t driving, too,” Luke mumbled, mostly to himself. “Fuck, baby, make me come. You know how.”

Luke returned both hands to the steering wheel and allowed you to move your head freely, to go at your own pace. You bobbed your head with enthusiasm, spit dripping down his shaft and soaking the fabric around him. You gagged at times, but the tight squeeze of your throat around him just added to Luke’s pleasure. He wasn’t shy about telling you how good you felt, either, making you more determined to make him come.

“Fuck, pull off,” Luke said, his voice a little shaky.

You couldn’t. You couldn’t, not when he was so close. The idea of having his come in your mouth, on your tongue, the manifestation of how you made him feel, was too alluring. 

“Y/N, pull off,” Luke commanded, reaching down to yank you off of him by your hair. He clenched his jaw as he held you just far enough off his cock that you thought, with just one bump in the road, you could capture it again. He steered out of the lane and parked on the side of the road. “You don’t want to listen? You’re so cockdumb that you can’t follow my orders?”

All you could do was look at him, eyes wide. 

He spoke through his teeth, never once blinking or breaking eye contact. “Since you want me inside you so bad, I’m gonna fuck your mouth until I come. You’re gonna take it. Even if you gag, even if you cry, I’m not going to stop until I come. Then, you’re going to sit back and buckle yourself in and I’m going to finish driving us home. You will not swallow. You’re going to hold my come in your mouth until I say so. Do you understand?”

Your jaw dropped at the words, the tips of your ears growing hot. “Yes, sir.” It’s nearly inaudible and you can feel your panties growing damper with just the thought of it– minute after minute ticking by, Luke’s come coating your tongue, not being able to speak or swallow. You’re completely under Luke’s control.  

He leaned back in the seat and motioned toward his cock. 

You allowed him to guide you onto his length again, getting comfortable with its size. You hollowed your cheeks and looked up at him, pausing your movements and staying statue-still.

A smirk took over Luke’s face. “That’s my girl.”

He took your head with both hands, keeping your hair out of your face and keeping you from moving an inch, and began to thrust into your mouth. It was sharp and hard and you tried to create a vacuum-type suction around his cock, as tight as you knew he liked it, but it was hard with the head of his dick hitting the back of your throat with every buck of his hips. You ended up gagging, and crying, and drooling all over his cock, just like Luke had said, and he fulfilled his promise that he wouldn’t stop.

“Look at you, making such a mess of yourself,” Luke scoffed. “Such a mess all over my cock, just to make me feel good. You’d let me do whatever I wanted, wouldn’t you, baby? You’d never let anyone else take you like this, just me, yeah? No one else gets to see you just leaking all over my cock because you’re mine.”

Your eyes rolled into the back of your head at that and the moan you released around Luke’s length caused his hips to stutter, made him unable to hold back his orgasm any longer. He came in stripes all over your tongue, some of it leaking down the back of your throat before you could stop it. He pulled you off of him and crashed his lips against yours, a close-mouthed kiss because you wouldn’t dare disobey, couldn’t handle the idea of disappointing Luke.

“My good girl,” Luke cooed when he pulled away.

You offered him a lazy smile, head foggy and bones mushy. You were sated, an elevated version of just happy, and so, so comfortable. You loved him. He was everything.

“I’m not done with you yet, am I?” Luke asked softly, thumbing over your bottom lip. 

You shook your head.

“Open,” Luke said. “I want to see my come on your tongue.”

You hesitantly opened your mouth, pushing your tongue out so he could see the milky white substance coating the muscle. 

Luke captured your cheeks with one hand and leaned in with the other holding your head in place. You stared at his eyes, which were watching your tongue as a line of his saliva mixed with the come in your mouth. When his eyes rose to meet yours, it was the embers of desire that made your head roll back and the instinct, the pure instinct of having something in your mouth, that caused you to swallow.

Your head snapped forward, eyes wide and not doe-eyed, not purposefully innocent to make Luke’s heart jump. No, your eyes were wide with worry because you disobeyed him. It wasn’t something you did to spite him or push him further over the line. 

“I’m sorry.” The words leaked from your mouth and you scrambled to take Luke’s hand in yours, clutching his right with both of yours. “Luke, it was an accident, you know I’d never–”

His mouth was open in shock, briefly, before it snapped shut and his eyes twinkled with something downright predatory. His hand was limp in yours (though not pulling away) and he was still.

“But you did,” He interrupted. “You did.”

“I didn’t mean to.” You were trying to reason with him, but you knew the damage was done. Whatever he had planned for you when you got back to the house, it was going to be ten times worse now.

Luke just shook his head and removed his hand from your grasp, pulling back onto the highway and resuming the drive home. You weren’t far, the area around you looking more and more familiar with each passing second. The minutes stretched for what seemed like hours with Luke’s silence. You held your own hand nervously, pinching at the skin of you knuckles and avoiding Luke’s face. You couldn’t handle seeing the disappointment etched into his features.

Luke pulled into the garage of the apartment complex after just about five minutes. Suddenly, it hits you– you have the apartment all to yourselves tonight. There’s nothing to stop Luke, or you for that matter, from being as loud or as public as he wants. There’s a window in the living room, one that Luke mentioned after your last session. A spark traveled up your spine when you realize that tonight might be the night that he fucks you out in the open, for anyone to see.

When he shifted the car into park, Luke turned to you expectantly.

You apologized again, softly, once he looked at you.

His features softened then, seeing your apprehension. He reached out and took your hand. “Are you okay?”

“I feel bad that I didn’t listen,” you replied. Your eyes fell on your shoelaces, which were an off-white color after plenty of use. You made a note to yourself that maybe you should wash them soon. You wondered if they’d return to their original color. The shoes were much more interesting than looking up at Luke and meeting his eyes.

He tilted your head upward with a guided hand anyway. “You’re still my good girl,” he reassured. “Are you okay to keep going? Or do you want me to stop? I won’t be mad. Whatever you want, we can do it. We can leave this in the car and I can take care of you, baby.”

You could cry at his words, how great he is about your slip-up. You did want him to be sweet, but you knew that he needed this. He needed to work through whatever was going on in his mind and if he could just be in control of this, just for a little while longer, it would be so much easier for him later.

“I want to keep going,” you admitted.

“You know your word?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Tell me?”

“Flower.”

“That’s right, baby.” Luke pecked your lips, but when he pulled back he was back to business. “Now, are you ready to listen to me?”

You nodded, eyes trained on his. Neither of you blinked, a silent contest that he ended up losing (something that would normally cause you to gloat, but now doesn’t seem like the right time).

“When you get to the apartment, you’re going to strip. You’re going to sit on the edge of our bed. You’re going to touch yourself while you wait for me and I want you to watch yourself in the mirror. If you come, and you know I’ll know if you do, you’re not going to come at all tonight. I want you to bring yourself right to the edge and stay there. Can you do that for me?” He spoke slowly and clearly, his voice gravely and dominant. He didn’t stumble over his words or pause and “um” like he did in interviews. No, this was when Luke was at his surest. This was when he knew exactly what to do, exactly what to say.

“I can do that,” you agreed, unbuckling your seatbelt and gathering your things.

“I’m going to give you a five minute head start.”

You nodded at Luke, opened your door, and left the vehicle. When you got up to the apartment, you didn’t bother to hang your coat or purse on the hooks Luke put up just for you. You didn’t put your shoes neatly like the door like you normally did. Instead, you dropped your belongings and kicked the shoes off one by one on your walk to the bedroom. You shed your clothing in a similar manner, leaving a trail behind for Luke to chuckle at when he walked in the door. 

Fully naked, you stared at yourself in the mirror that faced your bed. You read once that it was bad luck to have a mirror face a bed, that your reflection could like… capture your soul, or something, but you kept the mirror there anyway because if there was anything Luke enjoyed, it was seeing himself fuck you in the mirror. He liked to watch you ride him in reverse cowgirl, so he could see your ass jiggle as you bounced on his cock with his own eyes and your whole body in the reflection. 

Sometimes, his hands would drift up and he would hold your tits, watching how he could envelop them in his palms. You tilt your head to the side, watching your own hands slide up your body to do the same. 

For everything you could imagine Luke doing, there your hands were trying to satisfy yourself. If you closed your eyes, you could convince yourself that it was him instead.

His cock would disappear into your pussy, thrusting in and out and causing you to whine. His fingers would circle your clit or pinch your nipples. He would palm your ass, or reach up to wrap his hand around your neck. He would reach just that spot…

You didn’t ever hear it when Luke opened the door and joined you in the room. He thought you knew he was coming, with the way you were whining his name and begging for him. Your eyes snapped open as he closed the door behind him and you quickly pulled your fingers out from inside of you.

Luke walked over to you and sank onto his knees between your legs. “Gimme a taste, love.”

You offered him your fingers, which he took into his mouth. He sucked on them softly for far too short a time, in your opinion, with the way his cheekbones became more prominent as he cleaned your fingers of your wetness.

“Tastes good,” he told you with a smile when he was finished. 

“Thank you,” you replied, practically a whimper. Your chest felt tight, like someone was squeezing your heart in your chest. You were waiting, just waiting, for Luke to tell you what was next.

He rose to sit on the bed next to you, guiding you to shift over so you were sitting on his lap. “I’m going to spank you,” he whispered against your lips. “Just ten times. That’s all. It’ll go fast, but I’m not going to go easy on you. I know you can take it.” Luke kissed you again, snuck his tongue into your mouth for a quick, far too quick pass, before pulling back. “Turn over, baby, and lean over my knee, yeah?”

Your movements were slow, your brain turning foggy again like it was in the car. Luke helped you over his knee, still clothed. The contrast between how clothed he was and how naked you were almost made you drool. It was nearly embarrassing, being this down bad for Luke when he seemed to be completely fine, unaffected.

Luke snapped you out of your thoughts with a spank. The pain was only there for a split second before Luke was rubbing soothing circles over your skin. You shivered when he dipped his hand lower and trailed a finger through your folds.

“So wet,” he murmured.

You clenched down and he pulled away, only to deliver a second slap to your cheek. You shivered, goosebumps rising over your arms.

“So, baby, tell me,” Luke began, bringing down his hand again. “Why am I spanking you?” He waited for you to answer before bringing his hand down again. “Because I swallowed– oh– when you told me not to.”

“Mhm. Why else?”

Another spank. Now, it was starting to sting. Your ass had turned a pretty shade of pink that caused Luke to bite his lip and run his hands over your skin, feeling the heat radiate off the surface.

You were quiet. You weren’t quite sure. Holding his come in your mouth had been the punishment for not pulling off when he told you to. You had been slow to say please in the car, but that wasn’t ever something Luke would punish you for, just something he’d remind you to do. “For, um…” You trailed off, not sure what to say.

Luke scoffed and spanked you three times, harsh enough that his handprint stayed imprinted on your body for longer than it normally did when he spanked you. You cried out, your head dropping and tears welling up in your eyes. 

“‘For, um,’” he mocked. “You don’t know? You’re that fucking dumb that you can’t remember what happened less than an hour ago?”

“Lu, please,” were the words that escaped your mouth instead of an answer to his question. They were teary and he almost stopped, almost, just because of how your voice shook. 

“Please what?” He spat, another slap echoing throughout the room. 

“I don’t know,” You sobbed. “I don’t know why you’re mad at me.”

“Five more,” Luke warned you and you nodded. 

It took a lot out of you, agreeing for five more, but Luke wouldn’t do anything he didn’t think you could handle.

“How about this, baby?” Luke said. Slap. “For touching John’s hair the same way you touch mine?” Slap. “For letting the boys guide you into the restaurant like you’re their girlfriend, not mine.” Slap. “For sending John off to get me a drink when I told you to do so?” Slap. “For not listening?” Slap. “For being a fucking brat?”

You wailed, slumped against Luke. He got a good look at you in the mirror, boneless over his knee. He took in the red skin of your ass, tracing the line of his raised handprint. 

“You’re mine,” Luke continued, sounding off. You turned your head towards the mirror, eyes hazy but still able to make him out. He was waiting for you to look at him, for your eyes to meet his. “You can’t– you can’t treat him like he’s special.”

And suddenly, it all clicked. Luke was jealous because he was scared of the same thing you’d skated around in your conversation right after the game. Luke wanted to be special, wanted you to see him and need him. He needed you to need him, to let him take control and take care of you and decide things for you, all because he didn’t want to be the person who lost everything because he wasn’t good enough. Even the idea that John could possibly take Luke’s place, as preposterous as it was to you, sent Luke into a spiral.

“Fuck me, Luke,” you said, voice shaky and light because of the headspace you were in. “Take me. I’m yours. Prove it.”

Gently, so gently in contrast to his prior actions, Luke helped you up and lay you down on your back on the bed, placing a pillow under your hips. You lay there for a few minutes, blinking slowly and watching as Luke shed his clothes and rummaged through his dresser drawers for something. His back was to you and you smiled to yourself, too fucked out to let out a giggle, at his backside. When Luke turned around, two of his gameday ties in hand, he cocked his head to the side at your smile.

“What are you smiling about?” He asked.

“Boy butts are so funny,” You answered. “They’re just so small. Like… where are your hips, Lu?”

Luke blinked a few times, then shook his head. “Oh my God, you’ve lost it.”

“I’ve been thinking it. We need to get you in the gym.”

“You’re being a brat.”

“And your butt is small.”

“Oh, fuck you,” Luke scoffed. He had walked to the bed and was tying one of your hands to his headboard.

“I’m waiting.”

Luke huffed out a laugh at your response. “You’re making it hard to dom you, baby.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, was the road head not enough?”

Luke shushed you, moving to your other hand and tying that one with the other tie.

“What about the spitting in my mouth and spanking me?” You continue, goading him. 

Luke crawled up your body, kissing up your stomach and chest and neck as he went. 

One more sentence, and he wouldn’t find it so difficult to dominate you for this final stretch. 

He’s hovering over your lips, his breath fanning out over them.

“I bet Johnny could do it better.”

Luke pulled back, jaw dropped. His mouth returned to a strait line and his eyes turned murderous. There it was, there’s the dominance that he thought he lost.

 You smirked at him, proud of yourself for the comment you made, until Luke’s palm made contact with your cheek. Your head turned with the impact and you swore your heart stopped. You were too surprised to say anything. As the seconds of silence passed where you and Luke just stared at each other, same shocked expression on your face, you realized: huh. That’s not so different from when he spanks me.

Then, another second after that: That was kind of… hot.

“Are you okay?” Luke breathed out. He’s practically frozen in place.

“Yeah,” you replied. “Oh my God, Luke, yeah.” You pulled on the restraints above you, itching to get him inside of you. You circled your legs around his waist and raised your hips, trying to make contact with him. “Fuck, Lu, that was so hot, please fuck me.”

Luke blinked twice and searched your face for any discomfort, anything that would show him that you were upset or hurt by his slap. He hadn’t even done it intentionally, just driven by the pure rage of you mentioning John, saying that John could be better for you than Luke was.

It wasn’t until your wiggling hips caused his cock to make contact with your weeping pussy that he began to move.

He started by pinning your hips down.

“Greedy,” he chastised. 

“I need you in me, don’t treat me like I’m made of glass,” you whined.

Luke positioned himself at your entrance and snapped his hips forward, burying himself inside you in one fell swoop.

It knocked all the breath out of you. Even after dating Luke for ages, his size still surprised you.

“How’s that, huh? Can you feel me? Do you think I’m treating you gently?” Luke asked, grinding his teeth as he fucked in and out of you. His skin was slapping against yours and he moved one of our legs so your knee was thrown over his shoulder. “You think Marino could fuck you like this?” He practically spat out John’s name, disgust coating each syllable.

“Probably,” you quipped, your voice snarky. You were itching for Luke to slap you again, or something, because he wasn’t giving it everything. He was still shaken up by the fact that he hit you at all.

“‘Probably,’” He repeated, incredulous. “You’ll never know, will you, baby?” He snaps his hips harder, faster. “This is my pussy. It only gets wet for me, you only spread your legs for me, you can be a slut all you want but only in the confines of these four walls. You can be bad, only right here… where I’m able to fuck. it. out. of you.”

You moan, wanton and long in the back of your throat. Your hands are aching to grab his hair, to twist the curls between your fingers. “Lu, my hand,” you told him.

“What about it?” He asked, not slowing his pace.

“Untie it, please!”

Luke looked down at you, confused. “Why?”

You whined, keening as your back arched and you squeezed his cock. “Need to get a hand on you, Lu, fuck. Wanna pull your hair. So pretty, so much prettier than John’s.”

“Oh,” he whispered, his stomach turning. He reached up to undo the knot, trying to continue to fuck you and untie it at the same time. When your hand came free, it immediately found purchase in his curls. Your fingernails scraped his scalp and his eyes rolled in the back of his head as he bucked into you with uncoordinated thrusts. “Fuck, Y/N,” he groaned. “Gonna make me come.”

“Please,” you begged. “Inside me, inside me–”

Your vision went white and your pussy was like a vice around him as you came.

“Yeah, yeah,” Luke agreed, voice strained. He watched the bliss wash over your features and whined. “Fuck you til you’re full, show everyone you’re all mine.” 

It’s the thought of pumping his seed into you, making you round with his child, that sends Luke over the edge. No one would think to take you from him then, not that you’d ever go. No one would ever be able to call you theirs like he could call you his, not when he’s fucked you full, not when you’re carrying his baby.

“So perfect for me,” Luke mumbled in your ear, collapsing on top of you as he came down from his orgasm. 

“Just for you, Lu.”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.” You paused, rubbing his back. “You know we have to talk about this, right? You’re more than enough and I don’t want you to feel insecure anymore.”

Luke pulled himself out of you, wincing at the sensitivity. “Can we talk about it tomorrow? I think we could both use some rest.”

He got up from the bed and walked into his bathroom, grabbing a towel and coming back to wipe you clean. 

“Can it wait that long?” You fixed him with a look of concern.

“Baby.” Luke cut his eyes at you, then finished wiping you down. “It can wait until tomorrow.”

You shrugged. “Okay,” you agreed, then made yourself comfortable, pulling the covers over your body. You turned over, back to Luke, and spoke like it was an afterthought. “I loved it when you slapped me, you know.”

Luke groaned, leaned over to give you a kiss on your cheek. “I’m sorry I was mean.”

“Mmm, mean Luke gets me hot just like sweet Luke,” you replied. You turned your head and kissed his lips. “I like sweet Luke more, though. Sweet Luke cuddles me while I’m asleep.”

Luke laughed, going to toss the dirty towel in the dirty clothes hamper. “Sweet Luke will be back to cuddle you after he brushes his teeth,” he said.

When he returned, your breath was even and you had already fallen asleep, the ghost of a smile still gracing your lips. Luke bit his tongue, joined you under the covers, and threw his arm over the curve of your waist. Within just a few minutes, he was fast asleep next to you, softly snoring with his nose pressed into your hair.

notes: so, I, uh..... got a little carried away. I just kept having ideas. And I hope it worked out for me, to be fair. Hiiiiiii anon I hope this was good for youuuu love you bigggg I felt so awky-tawky writing some of this because as much as I would looooove a man to treat me like this, it feels so silly to write. Anyway. Loving y'all.

SEND MORE REQUESTS! I'LL GET TO THEM EVENTUALLY (they might not all be this long LOLLL)

[ts19009]

Hong's Anatomy: Part 2

Pediatrician surgeon!  Joshua x pediatric surgeon!  Female Reader 

Synopsis: Coming to Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital wasn’t on your bucket list, that’s for sure, but when you meet the head of your department, Joshua Hong, it's one of the only things that constantly brightens your day. 

Warnings: swearing, made up medical terms and procedures, i have no idea if any of this is medically accurate it’s just for story, flirting, smut (18+) (fingering, oral: f -receiving, penetrative sex, no protection, aftercare)

Words: 5.4k words

NOT EDITED, SO I MAY GO BACK AND EDIT LATER (teehee)

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You hadn’t been on a date in at least a year. What do you even wear to a non-official date with your co-worker? 

You were going to a fairly fancy restaurant, so casual was out of the question. It was down to two options. The red or black dress.

You had done your hair and makeup nicer than you normally do for work, it was fun getting dressed up like this after work. 

Just like you had planned, Jeonghan rang your doorbell right at eight. To which you opened it to see him in a dress shirt, holding a bouquet of flowers. 

“Good evening Doctor. L/N. These are for you,” he smirked, bowing and then handing the flowers to you. They were beautiful lilies with a few tulips scattered in the bouquet. 

“Come in, I just need a few more things,” you said, opening the door more for him to slip himself in. He immediately darted for the couch and layed down. 

“I had an awful shift today. Someone double booked me and I had to do back-to-back surgeries right at the end. Please tell me you had a better day.” 

“Somewhat. No double surgeries, but I did skip out on my lunch break, so I’m starving,” you said, making sure that your earrings were on correctly and grabbed your purse. “Now, I’ve waited on you long enough.” Jeonghan smiled, and got off of the couch offering his arm. 

“So tell me. Why did you ask me out?” Jeonghan asked, taking a sip of his wine. You took a minute. You didn’t want to say it was to try and “get over” his best friend, so you brought up the other truth. 

“My therapist challenged me to make one new friend by our next session next month,” you admitted. 

“You don’t have any friends here?” He questioned again.

“Well now I do. You, Joshua, Rose, Jake. You’ve all been very nice to me. I would consider you my friend.” 

“Am I just a friend?” 

The question caught you off guard, and made you choke on the wine you had just sipped. You quickly brought your napkin to your mouth to prevent spitting on him and coughed. 

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t expecting that question.” Jeonghand had a smirk on his face, but was patient while you wiped your lips. “To be honest, I didn’t think this was a date until Jake told me. He was eavesdropping on our conversation and told me to “have fun on my date”.” 

“It’s only a date if you want it to be.” He was smooth, putting the ball in your court. 

“I think calling it a date would be fun, but I’m going to be honest. I can’t promise another date,” you warned. 

“I expect nonetheless,” he chuckled, holding up his wine to cheer you with. 

“Cheers?”

“Cheers. To making new friends.” You chuckled at his statement and took a sip of wine before your food came.

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“How was the date?” Joshua asked, walking up to you at the Ped’s desk. You had just finished your rounds and was about to start prepping for your first surgery. 

“Dinner was good, thank you for asking,” you said, Joshua chuckled but nodded. “Just trying to make some friends.” 

“I’m your friend. Am I not?” 

“This is the first time you’ve called me your friend, but I guess you are now,” you said, not looking up from your tablet which caused Joshua to dramatically exhale. 

“What surgery do you have first?” He asked, trying to change the subject. 

“A poor little girl who has 3rd degree burns is looking for a skin graft. Jeonghan and I are going to try and give her a skin graft and then try to get her to generate new skin.” Joshua’s face soured at the mention of his best friend. 

“Good luck. That sounds like a rough case.” You nodded. When doing rounds you saw the poor girl who was in pain by just speaking due to the blistered and bleeding skin. 

“I asked Jeonghan to start without me. Watching her during rounds was awful. I don’t know if I could watch her when she was being put to sleep,” you scoffed. 

“Jeonghan is pretty good at cases like that. He’s good at detaching himself when he needs to,” Joshua said, ‘I gotta get going to my first surgery, but good luck with yours!” 

You nodded and waved goodbye as he hustled down the hallway. What did Joshua mean when he said Jeonghan was good at detaching himself? 

I guess you’d have to find out by being his friend. Or potentially more. 

About an hour passed when you were paged to finally head into surgery. Jeonghan had sedated the girl and had already started the skin grafting. You were kinda just there in case anything went wrong and as an extra hand. 

Plastics is way out of your knowledge. 

“How’d it go?” You asked, as Lia gowned and gloved you. 

“It was hard on her, but she fell asleep fast. Let’s just hope we only have to do this once for her sake,” Jeonghan noted. He hadn’t looked up from her face yet, but you could tell he was pretty focused, so you didn’t say anything else. 

“Okay. I’ve got the burnt and dead skin off. Let’s get that skin graft on and can you start prepping the fluid for the regen process?” Lia nodded and started getting out syringes and brushes. 

“I can help with the grafting,” you offered. 

“Sure,” Jeonghan nodded. You carefully picked up the individual strips of graft and carefully put the piece on her cheek bone. Then Jeonghan quickly took a bowl or solution and a brush and brushed over the graft to ensure it would stay and in hopes that it would spark regeneration underneath. “Perfect. Just like that, good job Doctor. L/N.” 

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“He let me do a skin graft Joshua,” you exclaimed, clearly excited. 

“That’s exciting,” he said, clearly not as excited as you, but trying to be nice about it. 

“And he said that he could already see signs that the regeneration process will go well and that she can grow her own skin!” Joshua smiled and looked up from his tablet. 

“Congratulations on the successful surgery,” he said, before moving away. 

“Wait? Did I do something wrong?” You asked. Confused where his cold attitude was coming from. 

“I lost my patient. She had a stroke and died on the table. So while I am happy that you did something new and saved YOUR patient, I’m trying not to be sad or angry that I lost mine,” he said, not briefly looking at you before looking to the ground and walking away. 

Leaving you to feel like a jerk. 

“What just happened?” Jeonghan asked, taking a seat next to you. He had seen the entire interaction take place. 

“I was just telling Joshua about the skin graft, but he was going through a hard time and had to leave,” you said, not wanting to make Joshua out to be the bad guy or share your interaction entirely. 

“Ahh I see. Joshua tends to bottle up his feelings and then they come crashing down all at once. Maybe he was upset because he hasn’t been in a while,” Jeonghan explained, leaning against the desk. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, of course,” you stuttered, “Just a little shaken up.” 

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“Doctor Y/N!” Jonah exclaimed, as you rushed into your first patient's room. “He’s seizing!” 

“Roll him on his side and push 10 milligrams of diazepam,” you ordered, as Jonah nodded and rolled the boy to his side. You quickly listened to his heart beat before moving to the side so that Jake could push the medication. A few moments later the boy stop seizing and stilled. 

“Can you book a CT scan for him Jake?” He nodded and left the room while you looked at his chart. The CT scan you had was almost three days old. A lot can change in that time. 

When the boy Michael was in the machine, Joshua popped his head into the room. 

“Ah sorry, I’ll come back later.” 

“No, we’re almost done. Just be a minute or two,” you tried to argue.

“No, I was just wanting to copy some scans to study and teach Carter,” he said, pointing to his intern. Kennedy Carter. 

“Well why don’t you both come in and try and help me find out what’s causing the boy’s seizures?” You suggested, as Josua looked to Kennedy, who was nodding. “He’s been having seizures for the past two weeks. One more and I'm scared he won't come back.”

Kennedy looked at the scans as Joshua looked at her charts. 

“Epilepsy?” Kennedy suggested, but Joshua shook his head. 

“His scans eliminate that and his charts say that he’s been in a stable environment for over a week. Did you page Doctor. Xu?” Joshua asked, as you nodded your head. 

“He suggests that we do a removal of the section that stimulates the seizures. That because he’s so young that his brain will adapt and make up for the missing section,” you say, “like a modern day lobotomy.” 

“That sounds crazy,” Kennedy chuckled. 

“It sounds like the best option, because we can’t figure out what’s causing the seizures,” you say, “we’re done now Albert. We’re going to get you back to the room.” 

Albert nodded and closed his eyes as the nurses transported him to another bed and rolled him back to his room. You only stayed a few more moments to finish some charts, but moved out of the way for Joshua and Kennedy. 

“I’m looking forward to the party Friday. Will you be there?” Joshua asked, interrupting your charting. You had gotten the invitation from Vernon, but hadn’t given it much thought, but it was Tuesday, you probably should let him know. 

“I think so, “ you muttered, “I’ll be a little late, I don’t get off till 10.” 

“I’ll save you a drink then,” Joshua grinned, as you looked up from your charting, a light blush spreading across your cheeks. You quickly glanced at Kennedy, who was smirking, but luckily, she didn’t say anything. 

 “Doctor. Xu, are you sure this is the only way we can prevent seizures?” Albert’s mother asked. Mingaho sighed, but nodded. 

“Albert’s condition is quite rare, we can’t get to the bottom of why he’s seizing so often. So we figured that stopping them all together would be better than letting them go on while we think of what’s causing them.” You nodded. 

“I agree with Doctor. Xu. The long we wait, the harder it gets on Albert. He’s lucky to remain as intact as he is,” you admit, “the sooner we act, the better.” 

Alberts mother sighs and looks to her husband. Alberts Stepfather. 

“Alright, just help our boy,” he says as you and Minghao both nod. 

“Of course,” you smiled, “we’re going to go take him up now. If you want to say a few words, now would be the time.” Albert’s mother nodded and darted into his room while her father gathered her purse and coat before going in. 

“Have you ever done this before Minghao?” You asked, watching Albert’s mother and father wrap him in a hug. Minghao looked around and grabbed your elbow before guiding you down a little further, assumingly away from the family. 

“No, but this is our only option,” he whispered, “Doctor. Jeon is the only one who has done it, but only once and he refused to do it again.” You sighed and nodded. This wasn’t going to be easy or fun. 

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Scrubbing in was always the worst part of surgeries. It took, what felt like forever. All any surgeon wanted to do was dive right in and start operating, but sanitization was just as important as anything else. 

So when you were scrubbing in for your surgery you looked up at the gallery to see Joshua and Kennedy. 

Great. Something else to think about. 

“Are you going to the party on Friday?” A voice sounded from beside you, breaking you out of your thoughts. It was Minghao.

“I am. I just told Vernon,” you answered, “what about you?” 

“Yup, I wasn’t going to at first but Joshua convinced me. Told me that there was a new type of spiked tea that he was bringing,” he chuckled. That’s right, Mingaho Xu was a yoga, meditating, tea lover when he wasn’t operating on brains. 

“Then I’ll see you at the tea kettle,” you joked as he chuckled and nodded at you before heading into the OR. 

Maybe making friends wasn’t as hard as you thought. 

Once Mingaho had opened Albert’s brain up, he took a few moments to make sure everything was in order before starting to cut a good section out of the left side of the brain. 

Your job was to make sure that the brain stayed moist so you would spray it with saline and then you would start operating after the section was gone and seal up any brain bleeds. 

You only looked up at Joshua once. He was watching you closely and smiled down at you pretty quickly. Before you could smile back the monitor started beeping rapidly. 

“Brain bleed Doctor. L/N!” Minghao said, not looking up, but pointing to the bleed. It was a medium sized bleed and located right in the center of the cut. You were quickly handed a a suction and irrigation device and started washing away the bleed. 

“Doctor L/N,” Minghao warned, you only had a few minutes before the bleeding would completely kill the brain and leave the patient brain dead. 

“Almost,” you said, very concentrated. A few seconds later the bleed stopped and the machines stopped beeping as well. “All clear Doctor. Xu.” 

Minghao nodded and resumed. After removing the remaining section of the brian Minghao let you close and then checked in on Albert’s vitals that were going steady. 

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“Albert’s out of surgery, he did really well,” you said, to Albert’s mother and stepfather. They both cried out in joy and hugged each other. 

“Can we see him?” You nodded. 

“It’ll just be a few minutes, and we need to keep him in a coma for a few days, but you can sit with him until visiting hours are over.” They nodded and smiled before sitting down and waiting for a nurse to come let them in. 

This was your last scheduled surgery, so you were now just on call. You had been up for a good six hours, with a total of maybe three hours of sleep. 

You needed a nap. 

You had found a fairly quiet on-call room close to the Ped’s unit, and close to the food court if you wanted a snack mid nap. You had only slept there once, but now seemed like a perfect time. So quickly, but quietly made your way to the food court and ordered a sandwich and iced coffee. 

Just as you got to the on-call room, you could hear someone behind the door. 

Shit, someone was in there. 

You knocked on the door, praying that the person was leaving. You could hear the ruffling behind the door before it opened a few seconds later to reveal Joshua, donning a gnarly bedhead. 

“Hey,” he yawned. 

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you up,” you apologize as he shakes his head and raises his hands. 

“No, I was getting ready to leave,” he reassured, “were you wanting to sleep here?” You nodded and raised your lunch. 

“I like to eat here then take a power nap. It’s the only fairly quiet place on this side of the hospital.”

“Tell me about it,” he chuckled, “well it’s all yours.” You nod and step in, watching him move around and collect his coat and throw out his can. “You did amazing in your surgery by the way. I didn’t stay for the whole thing, but I watched you fix that brain bleed.” 

You smiled, “thanks. I haven’t done a lot of neuro, so I really enjoyed it.” 

“I’ll keep that in mind,” he smiled, “have a good lunch Y/N.” 

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You indeed were late to the party much later than you hoped for. You got home at ten, and didn’t get back out the door until almost eleven. Luckily, you texted Jeonghan and made sure that the party was going to last longer. It was, so when you pulled up to the party it was almost midnight. 

“Y/N!” Jeonghan exclaimed, opening his door to see you with a bottle of wine. “You made it.” 

“I’m so sorry I’m late. I didn’t get out of work until ten,” you sighed, handing him the wine. He smiled and led you to the living room where everyone was. 

“I’ll get you a glass, just wait a minute,” he smiled. You nodded and took a stand by the fire place. 

“Y/N!” Joshua said, from across the room. You smiled and waved at him as he approached you. “You look great! I don’t often see you out of scrubs.” 

“Hey, we got drinks together twice,” you joked. Joshua chuckled and raised his hands. 

“Sorry. Haven’t seen you out of scrubs in a while,” he corrected as you chuckled but rolled your eyes. 

“You look good too, and I’m sorry I haven’t asked you out after work in a while,” you started but was interrupted by Jeonghan. 

“This is really good wine!” He said, handing you a glass and taking a sip of his. “Oh, hey Shua. Did you want a glass?” 

“No no, I have a glass of whiskey somewhere here,” he answered, “I just promised Y/N that I’d save her a drink and was going to offer her one. But it looks like you beat me to it.” 

Jeonghan smirked, “not my fault you didn’t open the door.” Joshua just smiled and then sent a little glare his way. You could feel the tense atmosphere and looked between the two men glaring at each other before Chan interrupted. 

“Joshua, is this your whiskey? Can I have it?” He said lifting the glass and pointing to it. 

“No Chan..” he sighed, “I’ll be right back,” he smiled at you and sent another little glare at Jeonghan before rushing to save his drink. 

“What was that about?” You asked Jeonghan, who just shrugged. 

“Me and Shua have always gravitated toward similar people. Both friendship wise and romantically, it’s caused a few arguments in the past, but we’ve always come out okay on the other side.”

“You’re interested in me?” You exclaimed. Jeonghan chuckled and nodded his head. 

“Was that not obvious? I mean I did ask if our last date was a date. I mean I can’t speak for Shua, but I can tell he definitely doesn’t just like you as a friend.” 

Hearing the blatant confession made you blush on both cheeks and caused you to look away, not being able to look Jeonghan in the eyes. Two very attractive, hard working, kind men. Interested in you? This doesn’t sound real. 

“Sorry, I managed to get my drink back,” Joshua chuckled before playfully glaring at Chan. “What did I miss?” Jeonghan just smirked and took a sip of his wine before making his way to the patio where Seokmin and Wonwoo were. 

Joshua stayed practically glued to your side the entire night. You would wander to each of the rooms talking with almost every person, but Joshua would wander with you, fetching you new drinks, food, and contributing to conversations. The moment he went to the bathroom Mingyu chuckled. 

“He’s pretty keen on you,” he smiled. 

“So I’ve been told,” you blush, “I don’t mind.”

“I mean, he’s practically waiting on you hand and foot.” 

Right before you could say anything else, Joshua returned from the bathroom looking down at his phone. 

“I just ordered an uber, do you want to ride with me?” He asked, as you looked at the time. It was just hitting three. 

“I better, thanks,” you smiled, as Joshua looked up from his phone and smiled. Everyone was slowly starting to leave, Seungkwan, Chan, Mingyu, and Jun were the only ones left and they were all in the living room watching a rerun of a football game.  You both made your way and took a seat on the couch together before the uber pulled up. It was quite a tight fit for the both of you, your knees were touching and because of the amount of drinks you had, you started leaning your head on his shoulder. 

“Y/N, the uber’s here,” Joshua said, nudging your shoulder and helping you stand up. “Thanks for the party Jeonghan, I had fun.” 

Jeonghan smiled, and gave him a hug, before giving you a hug as well. 

“Let me know when you both get home,” he smiled. You nodded and waved to everyone while Joshua was waiting for you at the door.

“Thank you for the uber I had a good time tonight,” you blushed, at Joshua. He had insisted on walking you to the door. 

“I had fun as well. Let’s do it again sometime,” he smirked, as you playfully rolled your eyes. You were quite close, you leaning against the door and him standing almost a step away. 

He smelled like vanilla and you could hear his steady breathing. You could still feel a light buzz due to the few drinks you had, but he was getting closer. 

“Joshua,” you looked up at him to see his face awfully close to yours. 

“Tell me to stop,” he whispered, leaning in closer. 

“That’s the thing. I don’t want you to stop,” you whispered back, wrapping your arms around his neck and pressing your lips together. He reached up and cupped your cheek with his right hand. “Joshua,” you moaned as you both moved further into your home and he pressed you against the door. “What about the uber?” 

“Should I tell him to go on?” He panted, out of breath from all the kissing. You nodded and Joshua smiled, before kissing you again. “I’ll go tell him that I’ll be staying.” You nodded and watched him quickly run out to the uber. 

You smiled, and fixed your hair in the mirror before Joshua knocked on the door again. You opened it to see no uber and a handsome doctor waiting for you. You wrapped your arms around his neck again and practically pulled him inside. 

“Did. I. Tell you. How. Gorgeous. You look. Tonight?” Joshua confessed in between kisses. 

You giggled, but didn’t stop kissing him, running your fingers through his hair and pulled him towards your couch. The back of his knees hit it and he fell backwards onto it. This was it, you hadn’t slept with anyone in well over a year, let alone kissed anyone. You were extremely nervous, and Joshua could tell by the look of your face. 

“It’s okay, we can go slow if you’d like,” he smiled, pushing his hair out of his face and starting to undo the buttons on his dress shirt prompting you to start undoing your shirt as well. 

You hadn’t worn anything fancy, but luckily it was all matching. When your shirt had hit the ground Joshua was looking up at you, smirking again. You leaned down and connected your lips again sitting on his lap. Joshua’s hand went up to cup your cheek again while the other ran down your side and squeezed your hip, before dipping it into your skirt. He slipped a finger under your panites and snapped the fabric against your hip before moving lower towards your core. 

Before he could go any further, you moved to take your skirt off and throw it right by your shirt. Joshua’s shirt hadn’t been completely discarded, but simply unbuttoned, you quickly pushed it off his shoulders as he slid both his hands to his pants and also discarded them. 

You went back to kissing for a few moments before one of your bra straps started falling off your shoulders. Joshua chuckled and pushed them both off before undoing the clasp in the back and letting it fall off, leaving you almost completely bare. You shuttered as Joshua started pressing kisses down your neck. While he was kissing down your neck to your collarbones and then chest you slid your hands that were in his hair and around his neck to run up and down his chest. He wasn’t ripped to shreds, but he was definitely toned. You ran your hands across his abs before he started kissing your chest more passionately this time. You moaned and pulled his hair a little harder than before, letting Joshua laugh. 

“God, you’re so hot,” he moaned again before he started kissing farther down towards your stomach. Sooner or later he was right in between your thighs.

“Joshua,” you moaned as he kissed along your legs.

“It’s okay babe, just relax and have fun,” he smirked, sliding your panties down your legs and throwing them by the t.v. “Do you have work tomorrow?” He asked, as you shook your head no. “Good,” he said before diving in and attaching his lips to your core. His tongue went straight to licking your clint, causing you to throw your head back and arch your chest. 

Joshua continued to lick and suck at your core while one of his hands went up to massage your breast and the other to hold your hips down. 

“Stop moving so much babe,” he muttered. You whined and pushed his head down. He continued to lick and suck on your clit as you moaned more and started moving your hips into his face more, getting closer to finishing. “Stop moving!” 

“Then make me cum,” you moan, looking down at Joshua. He was smirking. 

“I’m trying, but I can’t if you keep moving,” he said using both his hands to hold you down and went right back between your thighs, this time using his nose to rub your clit while his tongue licks around your hole. “Tongue or fingers babe?” 

“God, your tongue. It was doing so well,” you sighed, taking one of his hands and pressing a kiss to his knuckles. He nodded and started licking and sucking on your clit again, this time faster making you come in a matter of minutes. Just as you finished your climax, Joshua slid two fingers into your hole and started moving as well. “What are you doing?” You cried, still sensitive and watched him slide up and kiss you. 

“You don’t have work tomorrow, we’re gonna go all night baby,” he flirted, still fingering you. 

“It’s already nearly five in the morning,” you whined as Joshua added a third finger. 

“I’ve never had morning sex before,” he grinned, “and to think, we’re not even in bed.” 

“Morning couch sex. Who woulda thought?” You joked before moaning at a particular spot that Joshua hit with his fingers. 

“I’m not opposed,” he said as you came again. This time Joshua gave you some time to breathe. “That was quite lovely,” he said, sitting up and throwing your legs over his lap. 

“Do you want to keep going?” You asked, as he started massaging your ankles. 

“Again, I’m not opposed to doing more,” he said. 

“Do you want to go to my bedroom?” You asked, as he stopped massaging your ankles and nodded. You smiled and held out your hands and stood up, he took them and you practically pulled him straight off the couch. 

“Your place is really nice for only being here for a month,” he complimented. 

“Thanks, I had to buy new furniture and decorations for a place that I really only sleep in,” you joked, “I guess I’m doing more than sleeping now.” Joshua smirked but didn’t say anything as you opened your bedroom door and flicked on the lightswitch which controlled the bedside lamp. 

Joshua held your hand and guided you to the bed and gently laid you down before laying beside you. He was still holding your hand and started playing with your fingers.

“Do you have any condoms?” He asked, you shook your head. 

“No, but I’m on birth control and I’m clean. I haven’t been with anyone in a long time,” you say as he stops playing with your fingers to look up at you. 

“I’m clean as well, but it seems like Joe already told you,” he joked, referring to your first day after work, when Joe admitted that Joshua hadn’t been on a date in the six years he had lived in Seattle. “Are you sure you don’t want a condom?” 

You nodded and wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him on top of you. “I’m sure. I just wanna feel you.”

Joshua smiled and grabbed his cock, before lining it up with your entrance. 

“You’re so wet,” he moaned. 

“You did make me cum twice before this,” you joke. 

“Har har,” Joshua jokes back, “works out in our favor though,” he says before pushing himself into you. He didn’t push himself fast, but it was enough to catch you off guard. His one hand reached out and grabbed yours, pinning it above your head, while the other cupped your cheek more and started kissing you to swallow your moans. 

“Oh,” you moaned. 

“That it baby,” Joshua sighed into your mouth as he pressed himself all the way into you.  When he got all the way in, he stopped to let you adjust to him, he could feel you clenching around him and it drove him crazy. About 20 seconds later you finally felt good enough for him to start, so you squeezed his hand for him to start. 

Joshua smiled and started thrusting into you at a steady pace. Everytime he would slam his cock back into you it sent you seeing stars.

“Josh, it feels so good,” you moaned, arching your back, letting your chest and perked nipples brush against his. Joshua smiled and moved his other hand that was holding your leg around his waist to squeeze your nipple. You moaned again, clenching around him harder this time feeling a building pressure in your stomach. “Don’t stop.” 

“I won’t,” he moaned, pressing more kisses against your neck and face before thrusting into you a few more times and then cumming. He let out a groan, but continued to keep thrusting into you, bringing the hand that was holding your hand to rub circles on your clit until you started to feel the pressure in your stomach burst. 

You came hard. 

Joshua smiled and brushed some sweaty hair away from your face as you caught your breath and started kissing you again. You could feel the cum dripping down your thighs, you needed a break. 

“I can’t go again. I need a few minutes,” you whispered, pulling away from the kiss to try and catch your breath again. Joshua nodded and pressed one last kiss to your lips before slowly pulling out of you and reaching over to the bedside table for tissues. 

He carefully opened your legs and started cleaning you up while you took a sip of water. You winced when the cloth hit your core, but Joshua didn’t really flinch and continued to wipe around your legs. 

When Joshua was done, he got off the bed and picked you up, carrying you to the bathroom. Damn, he was good at sex and made sure to provide aftercare, you really know how to pick’em. 

After you peed Joshua carried you back to bed. You lifted the covers and slipped under as Joshua went back to the living room to get some clothes. He came back in his boxers and your underwear. 

“Can you go to my closet and get a sleep shirt? You can grab a shirt too if one looks like it fits,” you asked. Joshua nodded and walked into your closet. A few minutes later he came out in your old oversized band shirt and a new pair of panties and oversized shirt, for you. 

He handed them to you and crawled into bed next to you. 

“I can stay right?” He asked, as you nodded. 

“We’re still drunk. So yeah, you can stay,” you said, snuggling up next to him and nuzzling your face into his shoulder. You both laid there in silence for a while before Joshua looked down to see you fast asleep on his chest. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

taglist: @asasilentreader , @myjaeyunn, @gaslysainz @itsnotjop

A/N: Omg this is my first ever smut. I looked over it a few time to make sure it all made sense and was fluid, but if there are any weird things about it lmk. Anyways! So happy and excited that they did have sex because it opens up boyfriend Joshua core and I'm excited to dive into that. Don't worry, we're still going to get some love triangle with Jeonghan, but this defiantly adds something to the mix.

Anyways! I hope you enjoyed! And feel free to talk to me in the comments <3

[sugdenlovesdingle]

2024 fic round up!

Thanks for the tags @carlos-in-glasses, @nisbanisba @nancys-braids

I wrote 20 fics this year, which (for me) isn't all that much - despite starting and partially writing at least twice that. I've had the year from hell in more ways than one (especially the last 6 months) but fandom has and always will be a nice escapism!

Thanks to everyone that's commented on my fics in some way, I promise I'm going to try be less awkward and actually reply to your comments instead of just keeping the notification emails in my inbox like a dragon hoarding gold.

I mostly wrote bucktommy/911 this year (what can I say, that fingers under the chin kiss really did it for me) and if TPTB @ abc have any sense they'll bring Lou/Tommy back in the second half of the season!

Though the tarlos secret santa did sort of reawaken my love for Tarlos, so let's see if I can actually finish some of the fics I started for them in the new year.

I'll put the actual fic links under the cut so it doesn't clog up everyone's dash

Bucktommy: (all rated G unless stated otherwise)

Date night Bathena spot Buck and Tommy out on a date together

Buck's Bisexual Speedrun Buck going from 0 to 1000 in 0.03 seconds with coming out, accepting his sexuality, and his relationship with Tommy. Taking it slow? We don't know her.

Cake Time Buck and Jee baking to cheer Tommy up after a rough shift. Written back when we thought Oliver talking about Buck and Jee baking together would be a good thing.

It's not over Break up? What break up? Episode 8x06 fix it

Uncle Buck Post break up Buck and Jee baking, with Tommy accidentally crashing their time together. Bucktommy getting back together.

118 group chat Evan♥ has added you to 118 Fam. Tommy gets added to the group chat.

Wake up Another break up? What break up?? 8x06 fix it.

Being a good friend is hard Eddie is going Through It, but unfortunately he's going through it on Buck and Tommy's sofa when they want some alone time.

Family dinner the first 118 family dinner at Bobby and Athena's new house - featuring a sleepy Tommy.

Nobody knows Nobody knows we're back together - But Chim is about to find out when he needs a babysitter.

Transfer a What if? for 8x04. What if everything hadn't been fixed in 42 minutes and the 118 had been closed and Buck ended up at the 217 with Tommy? (I promised to write a part two for this... and it's partially written in my drafts. I'll finish it eventually!)

But first, coffee A coffee shop AU that's technically a 911/lone star crossover that started in this little tarlos centric ficlet but you need to read that to understand the bucktommy centric one.

He's good for you Maddie and Tommy spend some time together while Buck is in surgery.

Moving in A little quiet moment before Buck and Tommy move in together.

The boy at the rock show A different first meeting AU where Buck meets a cute bass player in a bar - loosely based on Blink 182 - The Rock Show "Fell in love with the girl boy at the rock show"

Tarlos (rated G unless stated otherwise)

For Lire with love and lots of whump This was an epic collaboration project that was a lot of fun to work on! Lots of hurt/comfort goodness with Carlos being a Bad Patient - until he isn't. My part was chapter 6 but definitely give the whole thing a read!

Love online A different first meeting AU with a side of meddling sisters. Luisa gets her hands on Carlos' phone and decides to take matters into her own hands to fix her brother's love life.

View from the taco truck TK and Carlos' relationship through the eyes of their favourite food truck vendor.

Austin Pride Tarlos go to pride with their dads, Owen is ~completely normal~ about it obviously.

Strickland Holiday Special A different first meeting AU where TK is Paul's roommate - who just happens to be Carlos' best friend.

As usual I'm late to the party, and I think most of my Lone Star fam has done this by now... so I'm shifting it to my bucktommy fam.

@weewookinard @cjlouwho @loulou-land @jamieroyjamieroy @leashybebes

@mrhappyjavaman @blitzynatural @sad-girl-hours23 @mmso-notlikethat

+ open tag for anyone who wants to do it

[lucy90712]

Road to recovery- part 8

Masterlist

Part of me was hoping that the hate would slow down a bit but of course it didn't. Every time I checked any form of social media all I saw was people posting about how much they didn't like me and assuming that I'm only friends with Pablo to gain something. I thought I'd be able to handle the comments but I just can't there has been so many more than I thought there would be and people have said such hurtful things about my appearance and my character. Pablo keeps apologising and asking if I'm ok and I just keep telling him I'm fine which is a bit of a lie but I can tell he already feels bad enough I don't want to make him feel worse by telling him how I really feel. The worst part about it is that everyone seems to be drawing attention to the things I was already insecure about which hasn't helped my mental state at all.

Today though I have a chance to cheer myself up a bit as I have a big check up with my doctor to see how my recovery is progressing. I think it's going pretty good so hopefully he agrees and says something positive as that would really lift my spirits. I've been nervous about the appointment today as well which has really made the last few days even more challenging on my mental health but I'm trying to stay positive as I know wallowing in sadness and anxiety won't do me any good. 

Alonso came to pick me up a bit before my appointment; when I got in the car I expected him to tease me about everything that happened with the game this weekend but he didn't instead he asked if I was ok. I was going to lie to him too but because he's my brother he knows exactly when I'm lying so I had to tell him the truth. It was kind of nice to get all of my feelings off my chest and Alonso was really supportive and gave me some good advice. He's been through things like this before with getting hate for his performances out on track so he told me to just delete the apps off my phone for a bit that way I'm not tempted to look at what people are saying. In fact he stole my phone and did it for me as I think he knew I probably wouldn't do it myself. 

Once I had my phone back I went into the hospital on my own leaving Alonso to wait in the car for me. The wait for my appointment wasn't long at all and then I went in and was immediately taken for some new scans to see how everything was healing. After scans I was subjected to a load of tests on my range of movement, how much weight I could put on my leg and how much pain I was in. The testing was rigorous and honestly quite exhausting as it's been a long time since I've done this much movement with my knee but for the most part it felt good. After I had done everything the doctor left for a while to review it all and look at my scans which left me just staring at the wall hoping to hear good news. Just as I was daydreaming the door opened again and the doctor came back in, his expression was impossible to read which for some reason filled me with a few more nerves.

"Ok Lola things aren't progressing as we would like them too internally you aren't healing as quick as we thought you would and your movement isn't at the range we would expect it to be" he said 

"What does that mean?" I asked holding back tears 

"For now it doesn't mean too much this can happen as we can't always accurately predict how quickly people will recover but we will set another one of these appointments in a few weeks and if we aren't seeing improvement you may need a second surgery so that we can see what's going on" the doctor explained 

"Ok" was all I could manage to say 

"I know this isn't what you wanted to hear but don't let it discourage you if you keep working hard you won't need the surgery" he said 

We scheduled my next appointment and that was as long as I could hold it together. All of my emotions that I'd been holding onto for the last few days came out all at once, as soon as I left the hospital doors I burst into tears and I couldn't do anything to stop them. I made my way back to where Alonso parked but before I could get into the car Alonso had got out and wrapped me in his arms. He tried to get me to stop crying and tell him what was wrong but I just couldn't he tried everything to help me all of which had worked before but today nothing could stop me. Eventually he gave up and let me get in the car so we could go home because right now all I want is to just go home and get to grips with my emotions as I clearly have a lot to process. 

As much as my eyes were filled with tears I could tell that Alonso didn't take the turn to take me back to my place which meant he was going to take me somewhere in hopes of cheering me up. I really didn't want to go wherever it was he was planning to go but I was sobbing too much to tell him to take me home. We went a bit further before the car stopped and I looked round a bit as at first I didn't recognise where we were but then I saw Pablo's house and realised we were just down the street. I should've known Alonso was going to bring me here but this is the last place I want to be I don't want Pablo to see me like this. I knew we said we would help each other out but I know for a fact Pablo is doing better and I know he's in a better place mentally and I don't want to ruin that by projecting my problems onto him that wouldn't be fair. 

Alonso had to practically drag me out of the car and down the road which was rather easy for him as I'm not strong enough to put up too much of a fight. We walked down the street to Pablo's house where Alonso left me to ring the doorbell, part of me was hoping that he wouldn't be in even though he said he had no plans today. Of course after just a few seconds the door opened and I locked eyes with Pablo who straight away rushed over as quick as he could and wrapped me up in his arms. I wanted to stop crying but for some reason I only cried more once I was in Pablo's arms it was like he made me feel safe enough to truly let all of my feelings out. Pablo said a few words to my brother before taking me inside and allowing him to leave. 

Pablo took me to the sofa and allowed me to settle into his embrace with my head buried in his chest so he couldn't see my tear stained and probably red and puffy face. His hand was gently stroking my back trying to calm me down while he whispered comforting words in my ears. It wasn't anything special what he was doing but hearing his words and feeling his hands on me did wonders in helping calm my emotions which I didn't have any control over. As my tears began to slow down Pablo kept rubbing my back and he even wiped some of the tears from my face that he could reach as I was still hiding most of my face. I never would've thought he would be so good at comforting me I mean he's always so hyper and full of energy I never imagined that he'd be any good at keeping calm and radiating that onto others but clearly he is. Once I had completely stopped crying and my breathing was getting back to normal Pablo put a hand under my chin and got me to look at him.

"Can you tell me what's wrong I hate seeing you so upset and I want to help" he said 

"The doctor said my knee isn't healing properly and I might need another surgery if things don't get better" I said still sniffling slightly 

"I'm sorry that sounds awful but that's not the only thing on your mind is it" he probed further 

"No that's it" I lied 

"Don't lie to me please just tell me what's wrong I'll do whatever I can to help and I won't judge you you know that" he said 

Damn why doesn't he have to be able to read me like a book.

"Ok I've been getting a lot of hate since we were seen together at the game and it's been getting to me a bit I thought I could handle it as I'm used to criticism but I can't some people are just so mean" I admitted letting a few more tears fall 

"I knew it was getting to you people on social media are assholes because they don't feel the consequences of what they say but none of what they say is true" he said 

"But they keep talking about how I must be using you or how I don't deserve to even be friends with you which that part is kind of true" I rambled 

"No it's not true I can't even imagine what my life would be like without you I love spending time with you just because you aren't famous doesn't mean you don't deserve to be friends with me and despite what they say I know you aren't using me I know you would never do that" he said 

"And before you say anything all of the things they say about your appearance aren't true either you are beautiful inside and out and they are just jealous" he added 

Hearing him say that put a smile on my face. Pablo has never really complimented me before he's told me my outfit was cool a few times but he's never called me beautiful so hearing it made me feel a lot better about myself. He must've noticed that I was finally smiling again as he told me I looked pretty when I smiled which only made my cheeks heat up but luckily my face was already red from crying so Pablo probably wouldn't have noticed. Although I kind of wish he knew how he made me feel because as time goes on it's getting harder and harder to hide my true feelings from him. 

Pablo's POV

The pain in her eyes just shattered my heart. She's been my rock throughout every step of the way so far so to see her breakdown right in front of me really hurt. This whole time she's been the strong one never letting anything get to her but finally it's caught up with her and part of it's my fault because we got seen together at the game and now people are tearing her apart and one person can only handle so much. I feel so awful that I'm part of the reason she's so upset but knowing that I can be there for her and calm her down makes me feel a bit better. When she arrived she was hysterical and her brother told me he couldn't get a word out of her so he wanted me to try so that's what I did. I'm not very good at keeping myself calm at times let alone other people but I tried my best and after a while of just rubbing her back and whispering to her she calmed down. It felt good to be the one to help her because she's done so much for me that anything I can do to even remotely repay that I'll do in a heartbeat.

Hearing the way she criticised herself as well it pained me. She's the most beautiful and kind person I've ever met so to hear her say that she thought she didn't deserve to be friends with me hurt but what hurt more was to see that those horrible people got to her and made her feel insecure in herself. Throughout the time we've known each other I've always wanted to tell her just how beautiful she is but I've refrained as I know once I open the flood gates there's no going back. Once I start complimenting her I'm scared that I'll let my feelings show but today she needed it so I knew I had to take the risk. Seeing the smile that my compliments gave her made the risk feel worth it though as I'd do anything to keep her smiling 24/7.

Looking into her eyes as she smiled and blushed at my words made me feel some type of way. I've felt something for her since we first met and I've kept those feelings repressed until now but I don't know if I can do it any longer. She's just the most perfect girl I've ever met and I don't want to lose her whether that be to another guy or to the fear of what us being friends might mean for her. I have to tell her how I feel in hopes that as long as she feels the same way it gives her a reason to stick around even when things are tough like they are right now. As scary as it is I have to take the risk. 

[joonkorre]

finished s3e7. absolute banger of an episode, said even more "wtf"s than last time but the tension throughout and how it tied everything up gave me the same high as s2 did. so spoilers (the way i just put everything out there for the previous episode reviews???? fandom etiquette where omg im so sorry to the 3 people who may be seeing this)

idek where they were going w chiyoh. like ok yall give me 2 east asian ladies, 1 died to propel will's drive for vengeance and 1 has some mysterious motivation that explains nothing that she does. the only thing she got going on is her steadfast sense of morality, which kept her from being manipulated by will (who's trying to convince himself that anyone can be primed by hannibal and is using the same tricks on her, poor thing) and let her focus on her goals, whatever tf they are. like good for her but.... what does she actually want???? whatever at least she looks cool.

the painting behind mason is so… ugh just in case the audience keke too much over his jokes and forget the type of mf he is lmao. and the surrogate convo between the verger siblings is so so fucking chilling dude I knew I KNEW right away what margot’s gonna find and it sent chills up my spine dude

I like how hannibal is unfazed by literally everything and discusses his being cooked and eaten with gusto and dare I say it, excitement. and I like how after a season of chasing after hannibal, that final betrayal of nearly getting his head cut open just made will so done w everything. did a complete 180. “you’re gonna eat him... w my face” and how he looks at hannibal and cordell as they talk….. get him out !!!!!

also: cordell. love his character. the perfect goon.

mason and his shitty fucking jokes. and just in case anybody wants to deny the homoerotic undertone of hannigram, let’s throw in that guy who ate his friend’s dick. lovely dinner topics.

loveeeeee that will bit out a chunk of cordell’s face and just how proud hannibal is in that moment. will just wants to get his lick back one last time, while hannibal’s still stuck in delulu land w/ them getting tortured + dying together, and takes will’s action as him being hannibal’s equal. he thinks they’re still friends/together and it’s soooooo funny

the branding scene + hannibal being tied up like a pig???? big day for subby painslut piggy hannibal truthers. I’m cheering for yall from the sidelines <3

the marlana + hannibal convo and him being broken free….. cinema. CINEMAAAA

the pig. good god the pig. knowing it’s coming didn’t prepare me for actually seeing it at all. and the fact that mason STILL mocked and denied margot of this one thing in this manner. god. the intercutting scenes of marlana getting the baby out + face off surgery are just chef’s kiss. so well edited that I genuinely believed will was done for like omg I woulda passed out if it’s not for mason’s face reveal. LOVE all the blood

white knight hannibal bridal carrying damsel in distress will???? don’t mind if I do 😋😋😋

marlana killing mason scene!!! margot w/ that fit, that hair, that shaky devastated enraged voice, and the tear-streaked mascara running down her face gives just the perfect level of drama. perfect killing-your-abusive-brother look. and the way they had time for hannibal to prostate milk mason ????? alana holding up a tube of sperm while the show censors the shit out of everything is so ?????? and yes YES CHEKOV’S EEL. after all the bj jokes of course he’d have to die that way. OF COURSE. although idk how they’re gonna have that baby but ig we’ll find out...

hannibal + chiyoh behind that window like they’re in a periodic table…. and hannibal moving toward that area between iron and silver…. CINEMAAAAAA

I see the teacup breaking as hannigram’s relationship + will’s becoming, esp since it’s superimposed over will’s head. bc it’s in his head, he’s making the logical leap to end hannibal’s hold over him, end whatever mania he was caught up in while trying to bait/chase hannibal. it’s done. read on reddit that hannibal’s notes full of physics equations may represent hannibal trying to calculate how the cup can feasibly come back together again or how he can turn back time to repair their relationship (both might as well mean the same thing). it can also represent the end of hannibal’s whimsy. they’re done touring the world and visiting museums and playing mindgames according to hannibal’s puppeteering. now they’re back in the wolf trap, back in the real world, where broken cups don’t mend themselves, where will decides that he wants nothing to do w hannibal and his whimsy anymore. they’re done.

I love how the season could’ve ended here as will guts hannibal the same way hannibal gutted will in s2: with surgical precision. he knows hannibal cares not for his life or death, and causing bodily harm upon him will only delight him more. so will goes for the heart. he knows himself well enough now to assert that he may tolerate killing, but he doesn’t have hannibal’s appetite. he won’t be hannibal’s pet nor friend. by exiling and forgetting him, will puts himself above hannibal as a god, and hannibal is helpless in his worship. he can do nothing but retreat as his offerings are rejected. and by god I’ve never seen him so completely hurt and devastated before. absolutely nothing has ever illicit such a reaction from him until will. jfc I HATE GAY PEOPLE WHY CANT YALL JUST BREAK UP NORMALLY

that was a good godfather II reference tho like omg

where the FAWK are will’s dogs. where’s my bby winston ????

love that jack’s back w the fbi !!!! will coming out and saying hannibal’s gone only for the little shit to emerge from the back like haiiiiiiii :3 girl UGH ik will was sick to his stomach likeeee

I cannot stop thinking about how it’s dark out at god knows what time. how hannibal sat behind will’s house in the snow like a stray dog recently abandoned by its newest benefactor and it can’t bring itself to leave, it won’t ever leave (girl don’t even get me started on that…. it will come back by hozier already got me in a chokehold). waiting for jack to arrive and turning himself in, denying jack the pleasure of actually subduing and capturing him. freeing chiyoh from her prison ig. AND getting his lick back at will. “I want you to know exactly where I am. and where you can always find me.” + the pettiest bitchiest look ever. it’s a pathetic, lowly declaration of bullheaded love born from spite, making sure will can never truly forget him and has to live w the knowledge of his location/fate in the back of his head. knowing full well will can’t help himself and are prolly gonna go find hannibal. once again I HATE GAY PEOPLE

jack looking at will w that smile/grimace on his face. I take it as him knowing that this is just another lovers’ tiff btwn hannigram and he’s basically an accessory to that lmao

100/10. once again a banger of an episode.

[kayssweetdreams]

A "Perfect" Vacation Ch 44

In moments, the police from the mainland arrived. As it turned out, all of the chaos was broadcasted live on TV, catching the attention of the Timeville Police Force, as well as the Asylum that had figured out that the Prim in the padded room was a toy. As of now, the Police were getting statements from everyone on the island, as well as arresting those involved in Prim's operation.

The entire Force had found the guards and scientists involved in Prim's crazed intentions, as well as Thea, and the Inhabitants convincing the entire force that Ka Lā was not Prim. "Ma'am. You are quite aware that Madame Prim escaped from Timeville Asylum AGAIN. And this woman does very much fit her description." The head of the Asylum said. Aria shook her head "No No! This really is Ka Lā! The real Prim had done plastic surgery on her to make her look like Prim, and vice versa" she explained.

The chief of police raised an eyebrow. "And...I don't suppose that you have an idea of how to prove that?" He asked. "Actually. I do." Ka Lā said, revealing a tattoo of a sunset on her back "Years ago, Thea gave me a crazy dare to get a tattoo of the most beautiful sunset in Hawaii. And I DID it." She said, a fond smile on her face. The chief of police slid his hand on her back, to ensure it was real "Welp. Looks authentic to me." He said as Thea walked over to her "That's the Ka Lā I remember." She said.

The two women embraced as the police arrested the now dazed out Prim, who have been exposed to both the drug, and the music needed to ensure its effects. Ka Lā grabbed another vial of the antidote. "Here. If you need to snap her out of it." She said. The cops nodded as Ka Lā looked to the inhabitants "So...How do I get my normal face back?" She asked, still not comfortable that she still looked like Madame Prim. Balan and Lance smiled "While it was one of Prim's cruel Tricks, this is something the two of us can fix." Balan informed.

A soft glow from Balan's hand appeared, as it did with Lance's. The two of them then placed one hand on each of her cheeks, as the magic soaked in. The false face seemed to melt into a pile of plastic goo as a much kinder, and much more youthful face appeared in it's place. When the maestros were done, Ka Lā felt as if an entire identity was removed from her, and that she had returned to the familiar sense of home. Balan summoned up a mirror to show Ka Lā her returned face, much to her amazement.

"I-I can't believe it! You gave me my face back! My beautiful and youthful face is back!" She cheered. Thea laughed at her friend's antics "And it's good to have the real you back too, giving her the tightest hug she could imagine. The inhabitants watched as the two embraced, as the sun began to slowly rise once more. "Well...we set all this up. Why don't we give the world a REAL show." Ka Lā said, a playfulness in her voice.

"I'm up to it...if anyone else is." Thea said. The group of humans, demons and maestros looked at each other...and shrugged. They been through a lot. So why the heck not. After all...

It is summer vacation.

Aria belongs to @shadowqueen402

[sheinthatfandom]

Time to make my Worlds End predictions.

Even though it’s not until tomorrow I’m feeling pretty good and wanna focus on something that makes me happy soooo wrestling. Gonna just put everything under the cut cause it’s a lot of matches and I have thoughts.

Zero hour

20 man battle royale. Not putting the pic cause there’s no faces anyway.

Why are we having a battle royale for the PPV this coulda been a womens match. Oh or a women’s battle royale. I have no idea who in this but since Lee Moriarty isn’t already on any posters for this PPV I want him to win. Scorpio sky should not be in this or wardlow just no neither should go near this belt again. Also is Chuck healed yet? I’ll also accept Chuck winning

The dream is for Yuta to walk out with two belts. Realistically, never gonna happen. Hook has never lost clean and after the last loss he shouldn’t lose to shenanigans again. What I do want is for Yuta to bring the monster out of hook. I want this to be a blood bath and for both of them to get the crowd on their feet and chanting fight forever. I want when this match is over for the ftw belt to mean the bloodiest hardcore shit in aew. Hook is most likely winning this but I want it to feel deserved.

Andrade lost the c2 and with CJ still gone after the infection/surgery it would make sense for him to lose because she’s not around to cheer him on and manage him to greatness. This should be miros match to win but it would be great if Andrade mimicked some of miros moves making it seem like CJ might have taught Andrade her own husbands stuff. That’s for commentary to put over but if it’s the usual folks I doubt they’d do that and will most likely be talking about what they had for lunch 🙄

So originally it was gonna be Kyle but I guess now we’re getting Takeshita. Which to me means they didn’t want the losing team to be3 people with belts so they moved him out. Hopefully it’s that and not an injury. Either way fuck this match Takeshita shoulda been in the battle royale. The only good thing about this match is Ricky and Will (Hobbs) being on the same team again and it could be interesting seeing them move fluidly together and Bill like 👀 are you trying to take a big booty princess???? Especially when Ricky makes it such a point that he and bill don’t know each other aren’t close aren’t friends and don’t even have a tag name and it’s all on purpose and by design. (Because the last person he trusted was will and will went after his neck.) And then Jericho is out here naming himself after nazi sympathizers. We already know whose winning and I hate it all.

IF SWERVE DONT WIN I WILL PERSONALLY SHOVE MY FOOT UP TKS NARROW ASS!!!! This man needs to be put on the fast path to the world title and losing to Lee when I don’t see any legitimate story for Lee after this ain’t it. If they have to let it be Nana coming in with shenanigans and run this back when Swerve is world champ.

I hope everyone has fun 🥰🥰

I’m hoping Lethal gets knocked tf out early and we can just watch everyone fuck nasty for 20 mins before Danny pins Lethal for the win. (And then we get Danny in a winners room with only the BCC cause he’s a good boy and deserves it) also Danny should wear the panties since he’s teaming with Bryan. 🥵

As much as I’m done with Christian as tnt champ adam doesn’t deserve it. I personally want Christian to walk out with the belt. But I can see tk giving it to Adam and with no dq maybe lucha helps adam and turns on Christian to keep a story going. But again I don’t want Adam to win here.

I love you mox so much you’re my fave wrestler in the history of forever you are the heart and soul of professional wrestling… buuuuut Eddie is and should be the one to walk out with 3 belts. The story that has been building not even for months for years is for Eddie to take this and it’s the only ending. Nothing else this is for Eddie

I’m not ready for Toni to lose the belt and I’ve never been a riho fan. I don’t hate her but I def don’t see her as champion at least not for aew. If Toni does lose it would be cause Mariah cost her but again I don’t want that. It could also be Mariah’s first match be against riho cause she costs riho this match if they don’t want riho to lose clean.

I want mjf to win only because I do not want Joe as a transitional champion and I really really want swerve to get the belt early in 2024. The devil needs to show his face already. Also who tf is our roh tag team champs right now? It better be the kingdom. Plus if joe loses and he willingly gave up his tv belt like can you imagine how unhinged he will be? It’s gonna be so sexy 😏 and then imagine zack poking him like Samoa Joseph I guess we know whose the greatest television champ is don’t we. This man is gonna be a menace if he loses will make it everyones problem.

Here’s hoping the devil is Adam or Kyle 🤞

[cailinsblog]

Part of my story on wattpad called Coaches daughter

Part 19

Sorry I haven't been writing I had surgery and going tho personal stuff 👹👹👹 but I will be continuing the book as do popular request to do so!!!

..........................................................

Y/n's pov

Tonight was the night for Connor it was draft day. Which is huge because you know he's going into an official NHL team. And he's the overall all choice, I thought he would be going onto the ducks (can't spell the teams name 💀) but he got the BlackHawks, but still exciteding. I was with him when they said what team he was going into "yaaa Connor I'm so proud" I said "thank you" he said a lot of people cheering as he hugged his parents and sister and me obviously 🙄. He walked down the stairs and they put the jersey on him he looked good. They took pictures and so forth. Than other people got called.

(So proud of Adam)

After all of that was done me and my parents and his as well as Adams family and friends. It was amazing we all took pictures and got food. And than luke hughes and his brother showed up for Adam and the other Michigan players came as well. After the night was over we all said are goodbyes and left. Me and Connor drove together , as we walked towards the car he grabbed my hand and intertwined are hands together I look over at him and he's looking the other way. When we got to the car he dropped my hand and he opened the door for me "m'lady" he said in a rich funny way I snickered and said "thank you my dear man" he got into the car and drove us both to his house.

@y/n_y/l/n

Liked by, @NhlBlackhawks, _connorbedard, NHLoffical, and 184,380 others

@y/n_y/l/n: proud of this werid'o

[slytherinshua]

Lovesick

𝐍𝐨𝐰 𝐥𝐨𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠. . .

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ genre and tags: fluff. hospital au. ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ warnings: reader and gyehyeon are both sick. ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ pairing: gyehyeon x fem!reader. ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ wc: 1.6k ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ a/n: omg I've wanted to write a verivery fic for the longest time and I've finally done it 😭 I'm really happy with how this turned out and there'll definitely be more verivery fics in the future!!

Your heart condition had always made it so that you were in and out of the hospital since you were two. You had hated the stark white walls and bright lights on the ceiling since you were that young, not to mention the bed with pillows so big you could probably fit your small body entirely on them and still have room. It always made you feel fragile and small - always being trapped in your hospital room, unable to get out.

But at least the nurses were nice. They helped you take your medication, talked with you when you got bored, went on walks with you to the outside patio in the hospital, and even read bedtime stories to you to help you fall asleep. They were definitely closer friends to you than any of your school friends which you rarely got to see anymore.

You thought you would always be alone in your hospital room, until one day a boy was put in the empty bed on the other side of the room. You were ten at the time, and took the addition to be a personal offence at first. It was supposed to be your room. You never had to share before.

For the first two weeks, you didn’t speak a single word to the boy. You observed him in silence, judging whether he was a threat to the normalcy of your life or not. He had dark hair and catlike features. He also had a habit of singing when he thought you were asleep. Except you were rarely asleep, and instead heard his surprisingly beautiful voice softly letting out melodious notes.

One day at breakfast, you finally decided to talk to him.

“What’s your name?” You asked him, poking at your small stack of pancakes to see how fluffy they were.

“Gyehyeon. What’s yours?” He turned to you, small figure looking as fragile as yours as he sat up on his bed. Maybe you two were in the same boat.

“Y/n.” You took a bite that was mostly strawberry sauce than actual pancake.

“Why are you here?”

“Heart condition. You?”

“My growth is stunted.”

“Oh. Is that why you’re so small?” 

He nodded, a small smile gracing his face. You thought he looked cute.

“How old are you?” You asked.

“Almost 12. But I’m the size of a 7 year old.” He pouted slightly, not touching his bowl of fruit.

“I’ll turn 11 next month…” You echoed, “I’m short too, so don’t feel bad about it… And the nurses here are really nice. I'm sure they’ll get you to grow up tall.” You encouraged, giving him a big smile. 

“Is your heart condition serious?” He asked after some silence.

“My parents and the nurses say that I’ll be fine, but they always have conversations I can’t hear.” You explained.

“That usually means they’re hiding something from you and don’t want you to know how bad it really is.” Gyehyeon said sharply and you scoffed.

“What do you know about anything?!” You turned so you were facing away from the boy, his words cutting too deep. You didn’t like being told you were sick, as if you didn’t already know every time your heart acted up. You just wanted to be healthy. 

“Sorry…” He mumbled, letting out a sigh and closing his eyes. A tear slipped down your cheek and the hollow beeping of your monitor was the only sound that filled the room.

//

“It’s your big day!” You cheered as a 17 year old Gyehyeon stepped out in his surgery gown. He had grown a lot over the years thanks to a strict diet and medication, and could now almost pass as the height of a short fifteen year old. You were proud of his progress. He looked stronger and healthier despite still being shorter than average. 

“If I die, it was nice having you as my roommate.” He joked, masking his nerves.

“You won’t die. We’re pretty strong, you and I.” 

He nodded, “I’m proud of us… I’ve grown almost 30 centimetres, you’ve been getting better. Hopefully we’ll both be out of here soon.” 

Gyehyeon and you loved to talk about the future - how your lives would be like away from the hospital. You would both be normal healthy teenagers going to a real school and having real friends. It seemed like a dream, but one that was obtainable. Eventually.

Nurse Park came in soon. She was your favourite nurse, and both yours and Gyehyeon’s best friend. 

“Look at you standing tall!” She said cheerily. She commented about Gyehyeon’s height every time she came in and it always left him embarrassed. 

You reached out your hand, still sitting on your bed. Gyehyeon shuffled over silently and clasped your outstretched hand gently. Nurse Park shifted through Gyehyeon’s files in the cabinet on the side of the room, only adding to the tension and anxiety of the atmosphere. 

Gyehyeon gave your hand a gentle squeeze as you laced your fingers with his. “You’re gonna be fine.” You whispered, bringing your intertwined hands up to your lips and kissing the back of his hand. He smiled.

“Once I get back from surgery, we’ll have our first proper kiss, remember?” He talked to you in a hushed voice so that Nurse Park wouldn’t overhear.

“I didn’t forget. You’ll have earned it by the time you're back in here.” You whispered back, hugging his short body closer to yours. 

Over the years, playful frenemies had grown into true friendship, and that had grown into a proper crush. Now you were both sure that you really liked each other.

Nurse Park turned around and you let go of Gyehyeon. He waved to you hopefully as he followed Nurse Park out of the room. Now you just had to wait.

It was probably the hardest wait of your life. He was undergoing a surgery that was supposed to help fix his spinal cord so he could grow without it obstructing him. You knew it would go well. It wasn’t as big a procedure as some of the surgeries that you had gotten. But you still felt nervous for it because you could feel that he was nervous for it.

You spent your time listening to music and drawing little doodles of Gyehyeon as you waited for 10 hours to pass. Eventually, a nurse rolled a bed back into the room, and a knocked out Gyehyeon rested on it, looking peaceful and healthy. 

You were relieved to have him back in your sight. Maybe it was because of his height that made you feel the need to watch over and protect him. Or maybe it was just because of how much he meant to you, but you always felt a little uneasy when anything big was happening to him and you weren’t there for it.

You thanked the nurse and she left the room after telling you that he should wake up within an hour, but would still be tired and under the effects of the anaesthesia. Once you were alone you walked over to his bed, making a small spot to sit at the bottom while you waited for him to wake up. 

He stirred after forty minutes, slowly blinking his eyes open. You glanced up from your phone, smiling widely once you saw that he was awake again.

“You did it!” You said happily, prompting a smile from him.

“I can’t feel a thing.” He said drowsily but clearly very happy.

“You hopefully won’t remember me saying this because you’re still under anaesthesia, but… you’re really pretty. Even just after surgery you look so good, and it makes me blush.” You blurted out. 

“Is that why your cheeks are pink? Cute…” He mumbled, eyes falling back closed.

You scooted closer to him, “I’ll let you sleep again… but don’t forget about our kiss later. I’ll be waiting.” You murmured to a half asleep Gyehyeon. He smiled again. You brushed your hands through his hair gently in a way that only lulled him to sleep faster.

You had to leave the room for your daily walk and checkups after that, and by the time you got back, Gyehyeon was awake again. The anaesthesia had worn off, and he was back to his happy and savage way of speaking to the nurses, cute grin on his face the entire time.

You were given your dinner and left alone again. As soon as you were, you raced back over to Gyehyeon’s bed and hopped on. He laughed at your eagerness, but you couldn’t care to hide it.

“I believe you earned yourself a present for surviving the surgery, oh great and mighty Gyehyeon.” You said dramatically, inching closer to him with each word.

“I wonder what this present could be?” He jested, grabbing your hands in his.

“I think it’s long overdue.”

“Definitely.” He concurred, his face only centimetres away from yours.

You smiled and closed your eyes, soon feeling Gyehyeon’s soft lips on yours in your first kiss. And it was amazing. He was amazing.

“I really like you.” He whispered when he pulled out. 

“Me too.” You mumbled, kissing his nose quickly and making it dust slightly pink.

“I know… You said I was pretty after all.” He said slyly, and your face turned a darker shade of pink from embarrassment. “Oh, and by the way… You make me blush too.” He leaned in to kiss you again before you could freak out about him remembering your words from earlier. 

He couldn’t think of anything better than this moment. It was perfect.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ verivery taglist: @yeonjuns-bluehair

[mosertone]

LIFE OF THE ARTISTSRenske Mann writes,Is anyone old enough to remember Camden Passage, Islington, before it became an 'antiques hotspot'? We - my late husband, the artist Cyril Mann (1911-1980) and I - often strolled down the narrow alleyway with its scruffy run-down shops in the early 1960s. One day, the local paper reported that a Mr John Payton had achieved his ambition to establish an antiques market there.Cyril and I were sceptical: how could it possibly succeed? The rooming houses in the area were crowded with itinerant Irish families, long before these were converted into today's posh £1m plus residences. In one shop was a young man, who shared my husband's Christian name. This Cyril ran a radio repair business and was the proud dad of a little girl who had been born with a hole in her heart.The two Cyrils became friends and made a deal: my Cyril would paint the youngster's portrait in exchange for a fashionable red/cream Dansette radio/record player, on spindly black legs. I wanted to listen to Beatles records, but we were too broke to buy one. Cyril, already hard of hearing, didn't like Pop, but said he could never deny his young bride anything.In his portrait, Cyril took care to adapt the child's skin tone, making her look like a healthy toddler. She wore a little blue jacket and held an orange for tonal contrast. He painted from photographs, which he never liked doing. Sitting still for hours would been too great an ordeal for such a sick child.The portrait done, the little girl was among the first at the time to survive the still experimental heart surgery. Sadly, the picture after sixty years is now too damaged for reproduction. I have no picture of Camden Passage, but you may like this drawing to remind you what London still looked like in the 1950s. Were people cheered up by the Gordon's Gin poster?

[thinkoutsidethefox]

In the end of 2021, we lost one of our old man kitty-- YinYang. He had been with me for almost 13 years and he was my everything. I was broken when he died. After 2 months of mourning, it was clear to see I wasn't the only one mourning YinYang's death. But his brother Mozart was also missing him greatly. He would wander around and cry for him and he would mope around the house. So I made a very hard and self-less decision: I had to get Mozart a buddy. As sad as I was, I was nowhere near ready for another cat, but seeing Mo as broken as me and knowing I could maybe make things better for him... I had to get another cat. So I started my search for a kitty friend for Mo. It was very difficult. And let me just add: As someone who worked in animal shelters before, I've never seen any shelter as empty as the ones I walked into during this search. We went to about 4 shelters and no cats or dogs. It was rather odd for me. So we found the one. A fluffy little orange boy that looked like a spitting image of Mozart just a lot smaller because of his age. We loved him. He was so sweet when we visited with him. Put in an application and got a call back almost immediately that evening. I was away at a party for a friend leaving and I didn't hear my phone. About an hour later I noticed I had a missed call. I stepped out and returned their call only to realize they had called to tell me if I wasn't available to pick him up "within 2 hours", the kitty was going to the next family. (This shelter knew I drove over an hour to their location. So there was no way we would have gotten there in time.) I told them to let him go to the next family. It was the right thing to do. A little while later I saw Lincoln on one of the shelter sites. And I was IMMEDIATELY drawn to the cute little scar she has on her lip. I called about setting up and appointment. We met her, super sweet. They told me there was a long list to adopt her and that our application would be the 7th in line. Our hopes were low on this one but instead I decided to put the application in anyways. It scared me how much I had already fallen in love with her and knowing it was a small chance I would get her-- I cried the whole drive home. The following day the shelter called me. I missed the call because I was busy at the time. I started to have deja vu! They were calling me to tell me that she was no longer available. I knew it. My anxiety was through the roof, I was already crying because I knew that it was a long shot. Expecting to hear this woman tell me I wasn't able to adopt Lincoln, I took a deep breath and called them back about an hour later when I had time to settle down. "You can come to pick her up tomorrow." I honestly didn't hear anything else after that. I was crying in disbelief. I was so sure we wouldn't get her. I cried so hard and for so long. When we went in the following morning the lady explained to us that our application was the newest one and she saw how much we liked her. So she followed up on the other applicants and most of them were either no longer interested or had found another cat. We took her home right after her surgery. And she honestly fit in almost perfectly, once Mozart stopped hissing at her EVERY TIME SHE MOVED! There were no fights or anything. They got on together after maybe a month of him sizing her up. She came into our home and started doing things our YinYang had done before her. Link followed me everywhere I went, she would try and cheer me up when I was sad-- brought me any toy she could carry. It was heartbreaking to think that we had not only found such a sweet little girl but that it was like YinYang had guided her to us himself. Taught her everything she needs to know about me so she could look after me now. Everything happens for a reason. We went through that process for a reason. And I think the reason was so we could have the perfect cat to heal this family.

[misfits-of-zaun]

“Hi! I did promise, yes.”

Jinx was looking far, far too cheerful about the current situation. It sent a chill down his spine, the look in her eyes. Those terrible, incandescent, pink eyes, snaring his attention.

Her palm touched his heaving chest, surprisingly gentle. Ekko twitched underneath the contact, breath hitching, hating that she was so close. Hating that he couldn’t see the scalpel any more from this angle. Shit, he'd have preferred to face down an entire enforcer firing squad than this. What the fuck was she doing?

What was she about to do?

“I did promise.”

The anticipation of further pain in his already weakened, injured state was bad enough, but the worst part was Jinx's expression. Her demeanour. She was enjoying herself. Enjoying his fear.

Great. I'm about to get butchered on a kitchen table by a psycho.

This was such a stupid, excessively grisly way to die. And of course to dump a whole truckload of salt in the wound, it had to be her doing this to him.

...Shouldn't have hesitated on that fucking bridge.

Jinx raised her hand to his face. Patted at his bruised cheek, patronisingly soft. A muscle jumped in Ekko's jaw, and he reflexively tried to turn his head away from her, but there was nowhere to go.

“Relax boy savior. Relax. I’m just getting the bullet out of your shoulder now stop being such a whiny little wuss and let me work. You keep struggling, and I might cut the wrong thing.”

Ekko stilled, breath catching in his throat as he processed this. Was she... was she seriously still trying to help, in her own fucked up way?

"Oh, is that all? Congratulations on getting your medical license, I never knew you were interested in putting people back together." The retort was steeped in sarcasm, but his voice was hoarse and high, almost hysterical with the conflicting mixture of relief and trepidation.

Was that what this was?

The news should have assuaged his panic. But he didn't really trust her word, especially not after she'd bailed on taking him where he'd asked in favour of kidnapping him to play some twisted game of doctor. Why had she changed the plan? Did Jinx even have any first aid training? Ekko had a horrible suspicion she was just winging it. The room didn't look remotely sterile or prepped for surgery, and the fact that he was awake and decidedly not under any kind of anesthetic made him even more nervous.

"Shit, you're really serious - wait, wait. You don't have to do this." He eyed her with growing alarm as she unfastened his tourniquet, ignoring the blood seeping onto her hands, and picked up a bottle of medical alcohol.

"Just. Take me where we agreed - aghh, fuck!"

Ekko swore and banged his head back against the table as she blithely poured the medical alcohol all over his wound, setting it ablaze with a sharp burning sensation that drowned out all his other pains. Son of a bitch, that really fucking stung.

Jinx was unfazed by his reaction.

“Not like it even hurts that much.”

Ekko gritted his teeth and glared at her, swallowing back the tide of gutter-curses rising up in his throat and lingering on his tongue.

“Should thank me for not just getting my staple gun and closing it up like I had to do to myself the one time.”

Ekko's glare shifted into something more appalled. She'd done what?!

"...That is deeply unhinged," he informed her, gravely serious, after a pause to picture that horrifying mental image.

For the umpteenth time, Ekko wondered what the fuck had gone so wrong in his friend's head to turn her into... this. How it was even possible for someone to get so twisted and messed up.

“This? Just a little cut, and stitch.”

Her hand pressed against his shoulder to hold him steady. The scalpel raised. Ekko felt a fresh surge of panic.

"Woah woah woah, wait - wait!"

Jinx didn’t wait.

The initial incision was just about endurable, if he focused solely on the sensation and not the terrifying fact that his enemy was currently cutting into him in a very backalley attempt at surgery. Ekko's breathing stuttered; he let out a pained hiss, followed by a string of bloody curses.

"Shit, shit, son of a shitting fuck -!"

Then she started digging around - and the pain skyrocketed. It felt like his shoulder had been simultaneously set on fire and put into a meat grinder. What the fuck was she doing? He couldn’t see, but it felt unbearable.

This. This was why anaesthetic was invented.

Ekko was utterly rigid in his restraints, seized up in immobile agony, fingernails gouging into the wooden surface of the table. The sounds that were being ripped from his throat didn't even sound like him; it sounded like someone else screaming. Someone who was dying a horrible death.

Abruptly, the pain abated. A bloody hand brushed against his cheek, almost tender. Almost comforting.

Ekko stared wildly up at her, gasping raggedly for breath, vision swimming. His face felt wet. His heart was hammering in his chest like a bird throwing itself against a window, desperate to escape.

No more. Just stop. Please just stop.

He couldn’t even get the words out. Fuck, he was going to die here, and Jinx would do god knows what with his body, and his friends would never even know what had happened to him, unless she boasted about it. Would she boast about it? Would she keep his mask as a fucked up trophy? Part of her had wanted to keep him alive enough to try this insane stunt, instead of just shooting him in the head. Would that part of her mourn him?

Was it better or worse to be mourned by your murderer?

“It’ll be okay Ekko. I almost have the bullet out, and I can stitch you up after. Just take a breath, and it’ll be alright. I’m keeping my promise.”

Ekko swallowed hard, searching her expression with a frantic intensity, forcing his eyes to focus on her features. He felt cold and horribly light-headed, like he was about to pass out again at any moment. At this point passing out felt like it would be a mercy.

Before he could work up a response, as suddenly as it arrived, the momentary glimpse of Powder-like earnest compassion vanished again.

“Now stop your fucking yelling before I gag you. It’s getting annoying. I’m sure I can find something around here, and if not I’ve got my socks. Stuff those into your mouth if I need to.”

"Sadistic... asshole," Ekko managed to grit out shakily, flopping his head to the side and trying to regain control over his breathing, counting seconds to slow himself down. In, 2, 3, 4, out, 2, 3, 4. Repeat.

Just breathe through it.

Panicking would only make him bleed more and increase his odds of going into shock, if he wasn't already.

Why was Jinx doing this? Was the lack of anaesthetic a deliberate choice, blending torture with life-saving treatment to satisfy a conflicting need to harm and heal? Or was she really just so far gone that it hadn't even occurred to her to provide pain relief, since apparently she thought staple-gunning her own wounds closed was no big deal?

"If you kill me by... playing doctor... I'll haunt the shit out of you."

@independentzaun

Despite their tenuous truce, Ekko couldn’t help but tense as his enemy hefted him up with frankly alarming ease. He couldn’t imagine her being able to do this before, but now with shimmer in her system it was clearly no struggle for her. Convenient in this moment, but definitely something that would make her pose as even more of a threat later, whenever this surreal little ceasfire ended.

As Jinx started to carry him out of the shack, he was struck by how much she seemed to radiate heat - or perhaps he was just cold from the bloodloss and the shock. Her grip was secure and steady. All in all, being carried was just about tolerable.

Until she picked up speed and leapt across the first rooftop.

Each jogging stride and jump jostled his shoulder, causing Ekko to grit his teeth and intermittently suck in a sharp breath, or bite back a groan of pain. Shit, this sucked. This sucked so bad. At least he could tell from snatched glimpses of their surroundings that Jinx was taking him in the right direction, however. Upholding the pinky promise.

Jinx's feet hit a rooftop hard, and the resulting agony that spiked through him from the sharp movement made the edges of his vision blacken.

Stay awake.

It was incredibly risky it was to be putting his life quite literally in the hands of this particular enemy. Ekko could not, under any circumstances, let himself pass out.

Stay awake, damn it -

He passed out.

When Ekko's eyes next blinked groggily open, he was indoors, lying on what felt like a kitchen table. Where was he? This wasn't right. This wasn't home. Disorientated and confused, he raised his head a little to take in his unfamiliar surroundings.

Then he saw Jinx looming over him.

...What was that in her hand?

Then he realised that he couldn't move.

"...Oh, shit."

A surge of raw, wild panic hit him like a freight train. Ekko weakly struggled against his restraints, breathing quickening into ragged pants as the reality of his inescapable situation sank in. His hands clenched and unclenched spasmodically at his sides.

"No, no - you fucking promised -"

This was bad. This was really, really bad. He'd been an idiot to fall for the pinky promise ruse - Jinx was a vindictive sadist who loved traps, he should have known better than to hand her the opportunity to betray him. Whatever she intended to do that required him to be tied down was undoubtedly going to be a much worse way to go than bleeding out alone in that shack.

He felt like an insect pinned to a board for dissection. Unable to even flinch away from impending agony, too weak to break free and defend himself.

"Just - stop. Stop-!"

Please don't do this.

@independentzaun

[rodenka]

who needs healing? ‎♡‧₊˚

[yourmidnightlover]

all my fault

Request: spencer and y/n are married, and they’ve been trying to have kids, and then she finds out she’s pregnant. a few weeks into the pregnancy, she has a miscarriage, and at the hospital the doctor said it’s bc she had an abortion as a teenager, and it fucked up her it yet us. spencer didn’t know she had an abortion, and blames her for the death of the baby, and they end up sleeping separately for a while and they have to grieve by themselves. spencer ends up talking to emily about it bc of her experience and it has a comforting ending!

Summary: when reader has a miscarriage after trying to have a baby with spencer, and things about her past are revealed and leaves things rocky within their relationship.

CW: miscarriage, pregnancy, mention of abortion, spencer’s rly harsh at first, teenage pregnancy, mentions of surgery, a cervix condition that i kinda made up, depressive thoughts, negative self-worth, HAPPY ENDING. *please let me know if i’ve missed anything*

A/N: i’ve been working on coming up with a series, which i posted last thursday! i’m sorry i haven’t been as consistent with my schedule, this summer has really taken a toll on my mental health and school is about to start back up. i promise i’m not quitting writing, but my writing might become a bit more sporadic in terms of my posting schedule. i’m still not sure if i like how i’ve executed this piece, so please let me know what you think!

IMPORTANT A/N: this contains serious topics centered around pregnancy and abortion. reader end up blaming herself and it is a very triggering subject to some. if you aren’t comfortable with those kinds of depressive thoughts PLEASE DONT READ. i don’t want anyone to be triggered by my writing. your mental health matters. you matter. do not read if your sensitive to the subject matter, please!

———————————————————————

when you and spencer checked the third pregnancy test and saw those two, very clear lines on the stick, you felt an unbelievable amount of joy.

“oh my god,” you clamped your hand over your mouth, your eyes welling with tears.

“y/n…” he held his breath, holding your free hand with both of his own.

“you’re gonna be a dad,” you huffed out a laugh as his arms flew around you.

“and you’re gonna be a mom! we’re gonna have our own little family,” he cheered as he breathed in your scent, elated from the news he had hoped for since you said ‘i do.’

spencer had wanted to be a father since he met henry, you remember how attached he was to the child who wasn’t even his own. you hadn’t always wanted children, only when you were absolutely ready for them. now, you were more than ready.

your arms flew around spencer’s neck as his went around your waist. he dropped to his knees and began pressing kisses against a bump that wasn’t even visible yet, praising you and your body for carrying his child.

because it was so hard for you to get pregnant, spencer decided to baby you every chance he got. you didn’t do the dishes or sweep, you weren’t allowed to reach for high shelves or even step on a chair to do so. he was worried about you and the baby, so you let him. you found it endearing.

the perfect man that you married was so worried about the little bean inside of you, worried for your safety, that it drove him a bit mad. who were you to complain? each time he’d do one of the new little quirks like not letting you lift anything above 10 pounds, you just smiled to yourself and brushed it off.

being pregnant was something that you had lost hope for, in all honesty. spencer had been talking to a few friends who had adopted children prior to finding out you were pregnant. if this hadn’t worked out, the two of you were going to look into adoption.

spencer had planned your doctors appointment for 6 weeks after your last period. the appointment was in three days. and then the perfect outline you had for your future went down in crumbles.

you had been having pains in your lower abdomen, and you figured it was just because you were pregnant. you went to the bathroom like you normally would when you felt queasy, kneeling by the toilet in preparation for what was to come. only nothing came.

you decided to just go pee and get back to bed. there was a pain that wasn’t like you’d felt before when you were peeing, like someone had been pulling your intestines out of your body. when you looked down, you felt your stomach drop.

“spencer!” you cried out. “spencer, hurry!” you felt tears well in your eyes until he ran up beside you. his hand was on your thigh as the other one was trying to steady your shaking hand.

“what is… oh,” he looked in the toilet to see blood inside of it.

“spencer… what happened? i don’t know what happened. everything was doing so well and the baby-we just found out and now they’re-wh-what’s gonna happen?” you rambled out, unsure of how something this horrific happened so quickly.

“i-i don’t know, my love,” he pressed a kiss to your forehead. “i don’t know. but we’ll go to the hospital right now, okay? we’ll get answers.”

you just nodded. you couldn’t speak anymore. you felt your throat closing in on yourself. you cleaned yourself up and got dressed. even looking in the mirror with spencer’s arms around you, you didn’t feel anything but guilt and worry.

spencer’s touch would usually be something to ease your mind and take away the thoughts of everything else around you. only this was something wrong inside of you. you were the problem this time. and you didn’t think anything could fix this feeling.

“let’s get to the hospital, yea?” you nodded as he held onto your hand, trying to ground you to himself as he guided you to the car.

you were silent the entire drive to the doctor. there was nothing to say. there was nothing to do. there was just… nothing. you were numb.

“hey,” he spoke up, “we don’t know what happened yet. there’s a chance it’s just a fluke, right? the baby might be okay.”

“what’re the statistics, spencer? tell them to me,” you ordered as tears flowed from your eyes.

“y/n…”

“tell me! why don’t you want me to know?!” you accused him, looking over at the man driving as he but his lower lip. “1 in 4 women who experience bleeding during a pregnancy are fine. 25 percent. the other 75 percent of people have either a miscarriage or serious complications. those are the statistics.”

“y/n…” he sighed, “it’s not your fault. you didn’t want this to happen. besides, there’s still a 25 percent chance that nothings wrong.”

“whatever,” you rolled your eyes and opted to look out of the window for the remainder of the drive to the hospital.

-

“alright,” the doctor entered the room. “we have the results from the test and we’ve examined the ultrasound pictures. i’m so sorry, but you’ve had a miscarriage.”

what were you supposed to feel? an overwhelming sense of sorrow? like a failure? like the one thing you wanted most in the world fell through?

“how-how did this happen?” you spoke through the tears. “we were so-we were careful. i didn’t lift heavy objects, i didn’t do repetitive motions, i just… we tried so hard to make this work,” you shook your head in disapproval, as if you wouldn’t accept the answer that had already been proven to you.

“there’s proof of an abortion when you were a teenager. there was severe damage done to your cervix that wasn’t assessed pre-pregnancy. now, we can repair the damage within the next two months, but it will still be difficult to become pregnant after the surgery,” the female informed you.

“then what’s the point of getting the surgery?” you scoffed, looking at spencer who was just staring off in space.

“while getting pregnant will still be difficult, maintaining the pregnancy is much more likely. the fetus would be more protected and secure after the surgery,” she explained with a pitiful smile, you couldn’t help but wonder how she could smile after giving you the worst news of your life.

“right,” you nodded curtly, allowing her to sense the mood of the conversation.

“i’ll leave you two be. i’m so sorry for your loss,” she gave the both of you a pitiful smile before exiting the room, the only sound audible being the closing of the door.

it didn’t feel real. it felt as though you were in a nightmare. only this time, you wouldn’t wake in spencer’s comforting arms. you wouldn’t hear the soft soothing voice of the man you love trying to calm you down. you wouldn’t feel the solace he would provide by merely being himself in your proximity.

the drive home was eerily quiet. there was an inkling of animosity between you. looking over at spencer in the driver’s seat, he had a dead look on his face, the only sign of previous emotion being his red-rimmed eyes and tear-stained cheeks. he didn’t even look like your spencer. he looked like a stranger in the drivers seat with a cold expression that you could barely read.

you knew this was something you should talk about. when the nurse came back in the room it was only to offer a few referrals go therapists that specialized in this kind of grief. clearly, any couple should talk about losing an unborn baby. but you knew that’s not what spencer was truly upset about.

you waited until you shut the door to your apartment before saying anything.

“maybe we should talk about it?” you whispered, not knowing how he’d react.

“about what? the fact that you’ve lied to me for our entire relationship?!” he wouldn’t even turn around to face you. “i thought we were in this together, y/n. we aren’t supposed to keep secrets from each other - especially not any that just killed our child!”

“hey…” you winced at his words. “why would you say that?”

“that’s the truth! your choices when you were a teenager just killed our child! my child!” he finally turned to face you, and you wished he hadn’t.

“do you think i knew they would botch my abortion, spencer?! do you think that’s what i wanted?!” you stepped closer to him, he sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

“i don’t know what you want anymore, y/n,” he shook his head, clearly exasperated.

“i want you. i want to get the surgery to fix my cervix. i want to grieve our child. i still want kids… with you, spencer,” you tried to ease the mood, calm him down. you reached your hand out to cup his cheek before he dodged your touch, afraid of touching you. “but you don’t want that?” you whispered so quiet, too afraid of the answer to raise your voice.

“i-“ he sighed and bit his lower lip. “i don’t know.”

“right. of course you don’t,” you shook your head before sitting on the couch, dropping your face in your hands.

“what’s that supposed to mean?” he scoffed as he took off his coat.

“it means that: of course, you’re making this about you! it can’t be about us grieving our loss together like the doctor recommended?!” you peeked between your hands at the man you still didn’t recognize.

“maybe we shouldn’t grieve together since we can’t even have a conversation without getting angry at one another,” he tried to reason.

“the only reason i’m getting mad is because you’re blaming me for my baby’s death,” you spat back at the doctor before you.

“because it’s your fault!” he stood strong in his belief. “when you were a teenager, did you or did you not have an abortion?”

“i did,” you admitted.

“and the nurse said that in said abortion, they screwed your cervix up! if you didn’t have that abortion, our child would still be alive! we would be on our way to become happy parents!” he accused, rubbing salt in the already stinging wound. “it’s your fucking fault!”

“stop saying that,” you shook your head and dropped it back in your hands, trying to hide the tears that began to flow down your face.

“it is, y/n! i can’t believe you’re even trying to say this isn’t!” he chuckled, clearly getting under your skin.

“shut up, spencer!”

“i can’t, y/n!” he sat in the chair across from you before standing back up, too hyper to sit. “no wonder it was so hard for you to get pregnant.”

“spencer,” you begged him to stop, meeting his face with your teary eyes.

“y/n,” he stared you in the eyes, and you saw a glimpse of the man you loved for a second before he retreated to the bedroom.

you sat on the couch in confusion of what had just occurred.

when you were 15, you’re boyfriend was adamant about taking your relationship “to the next step.” you didn’t think you were ready to have sex, but you wanted him to stay with you. so, you gave in. it just so happened to be that you were one of the lucky girls that ends up getting pregnant her first time in spite of birth control and a condom. you couldn’t tell your mom about your pregnancy, she’d have your head on a pole.

so, you earned enough money from your job to get an abortion yourself. you went to a clinic and had your boyfriend’s mom come with you to sign as your guardian. was it smart to get an abortion that cheap? probably not. but you had no other choice. your mom had made it abundantly clear that if she caught you fooling around with him that she’d kick you out.

you were 15. you were young and still had to finish high school. there was no support system for you. you would’ve been on the streets with a little baby - not to mention the amount of debt you’d go into for just giving birth to a child in a hospital. it was the only choice.

and now you were being berated for making the only choice you even had - and by the person you loved most in the world.

you curled into yourself on the couch, laying your head on the arm and crying into the fabric. you released all of the tension and turmoil. you held onto the cushions as if it were the man that you wanted - no, needed to comfort you. because as much as you’d hate to admit it and try to fight those thoughts, part of you thought that spencer was right. it was your fault.

you fell asleep on the couch that night. you didn’t have the strength to get up to grab a blanket so you just sucked it up.

spencer didn’t sleep at all. he was used to having you curled into his chest, or himself on yours. he felt terrible about how he had talked to you, but he was too stubborn to admit anything just yet.

in the middle of the night he went out of the room to grab a glass of water. he saw you curled up in a ball, you head resting on the arm of the couch as you slept. it was the most peaceful you looked in the past 24 hours. but you began shivering as you slept. you were probably too exhausted to get up to do anything.

he went to the hall closet on a detour and grabbed your favorite, soft blanket and laid it on top of your body. after placing a soft kiss on your forehead, he went into the kitchen and made his glass of water before taking one more glance at you. you had snuggled into the blanket, pulling it up to your chin with a gentle smile that always appeared when he kissed your forehead as you slept.

maybe he didn’t screw up too badly, after all.

the next few days were spent avoiding one another. spencer couldn’t face you after knowing you had kept something so dire from him for the entirety of your relationship. you couldn’t face him after he made you feel as though it was your fault you lost your baby.

you would stay on the couch all day, barely eating or drinking anything while spencer would go out - only mentioning the library or the office to do more paperwork. eventually he just started sleeping at morgan’s house - probably because he couldn’t stand being around you.

you didn’t know how to grieve your baby, you were hoping that spencer might help, but that clearly won’t be happening. on top of that, you were worrying about your marriage. he couldn’t even look at you, how was he supposed to talk to you and sleep beside you?

a lot of times, it’s perceived that the only reason women were put on this planet were to have children - of course that’s a false notion, but it didn’t make it sting any less. your body had betrayed you. you had betrayed yourself.

it was only 12 days after spencer left when he came back home, if he could call it that anymore. once he walked into the living room, he saw you curled up in that same position on the couch. you had a blank stare that was directed towards the black tv. the only evidence that you were doing something was the empty water bottles surrounding you - certainly not enough considering he’d been gone for over a week.

when he entered you didn’t even flinch. your gaze stayed on the empty screen and your face remained vacant of any emotion.

in all honesty, morgan was the one to tell spencer he should check on you. spencer hadn’t told him everything about your argument, he knew he was in the wrong. but he was just so angry. regardless, he was here now, and it’s a good thing he was.

you hadn’t been taking care of yourself. spencer had morgan and savannah checking on him, but you had nobody. he only realized this when morgan pointed it out. and as upset as he was, spencer would always love you. your expressionless face only worried him more. your clothes had been changed from when he last saw you, but he doubts you’ve had a shower.

he stayed silent as he began picking up the empty water bottles from around the table and couch. you looked at him quizzically with furrowed brows.

“what’re you doing?” you asked, your chin already quivering as tears threatened to stream down your face.

“i’m trying to help,” he whispered as sensitively as he could, making eye contact with the most pitiful face you’d ever seen.

“i think you’ve helped enough,” you rolled your eyes before resuming your serious stare-down with the television. “you can leave.”

“no, i can’t,” he replied, sitting down on the opposite end of the couch while being sure not to touch you - he didn’t know if you were ready for that.

“you already did,” you brought to his attention, briefly looking at him. “just go.”

“y/n, i-“

“i don’t want to hear it! what’re you gonna say that could make me feel worse, spencer?!” you let the tears fall past your waterline. “i know it’s my fault. i know i screwed up! and i’m sorry! i’m so sorry!” you replied with far too much sincerity, the tears streaming down your face before he scooted closer to you, planning on wrapping his arms around you. “stop! don’t come near me!” you pushed his shoulders away. “it’s my fault,” you lowered your voice significantly before wrapping your arms around yourself.

he had called emily as soon as he got back into the bedroom. he knew she had previously had an abortion when she was a teenager, and he just needed to hear her side of it. part of him didn’t even expect her to pick up the phone.

“reid, what’s wrong?” she immediately answered.

“i-i think i need to talk to you,” he whispered in a hushed tone.

“right now?” she asked in a mildly concerned tone.

“if you can? the sooner the better,” he answered honestly.

“alright. you want to meet somewhere or just come over?”

“can i just come over? it’s really personal and i wasn’t sure who else to go to,” he began tying his shoes and hoping she’d agree.

“of course, come on over,” she replied in a worried voice.

“ok. i’ll be there in twenty.”

he quietly left the apartment, not before sparing you a regretful glance. he lost his child, but you also lost your child as well. he just couldn’t control his anger. and partially, he thought he was right.

how could you not have told him about something so serious? the second you had began having issues getting pregnant, maybe you should’ve been open about previous pregnancies.

“hey,” emily greeted before giving him a hug after seeing his teary eyes. “come inside.”

“thanks,” he sniffled before stepping into her apartment.

she guided him into her living room and sat down on the couch beside him. they sat there for a few silent minutes before he was able to work up enough courage.

“y/n was pregnant,” he whispered, barely audible if she weren’t right beside him.

“was,” she pointed out, already feeling as though she knew the rest of the story.

“she uhm-she miscarried two weeks ago,” he somberly admitted for the first time to someone else. “the doctor said it was because she had an abortion when she was a teenager that somehow ruined her cervix.”

“and that’s why you felt like you needed to talk to me?” she gathered, she was a great profiler for a reason but this was far more obvious.

“i was pretty harsh. i-i told her it was her fault,” he bit his lower lip as he grimaced. “i really rubbed it in, too.”

“spencer… “ she sighed, taking a deep breath before continuing. “you’re mourning a life, right now. obviously, that would raise tensions and emotions would be heightened. but… have you apologized? for telling her it was her fault?”

“no?” he replied after thinking about it. “i was going to do that today but she’s… she’s not in good shape. i’m not saying she needs to be perfect, but while i was at derek’s i can tell she didn’t take care of herself. she barely drank any water.”

“did you ask her why she had an abortion? why she didn’t tell you? did you ask her anything about how she’s feeling?” emily asked once more.

“no,” he cowered down, feeling even worse about the truthful answer. “i was just… selfish. i didn’t think about how she’s feeling. i just-i feel so bad now, seeing what state she’s in.”

“when i got an abortion it was because i wasn’t ready for a child,” she began to inform him. “i was a child, myself. how was a child supposed to take care of another one? my mother would’ve been disgraced. i basically had nobody there for me. i kept it a secret because having an abortion is so controversial. i knew people would look at me differently for making a responsible decision for my future.”

“god, i feel so bad,” he began to tear up himself. “i love her so much and i told her these horrible things.”

“make it right, spencer,” she gave him a supportive smile and pat his thigh before he stood up.

“i-i have to go,” he wiped the tears from his face before giving emily a hug, grateful she would listen to him at such an ungodly hour.

he quickly drove back home, where he decidedly belonged in the first place. he never should’ve left home. he never should’ve left you. you were his home, and he didn’t know how he could possibly lose sight of that.

“y/n,” he cooed as he entered the apartment once more. it was noticeably a bit more clean. the trash was taken out, the dishes were done, and your hair was wet from a shower - he assumed. “hey,” he smiled when he saw you sitting on the bed, cheeks still red and tear-stained with red, puffy eyes.

“hi,” you sighed as you brushed your hair, spencer sat down beside you.

“how’re you feeling?” you shrugged. “i need to apologize to you,” he admitted, placing a hand on your thigh. “i’m so, so sorry for what i said. telling you that it’s your fault that we lost our child… i-there’s no excuse. i was clearly upset, but so were you. what i said was so out of line, and i’ll never be able to express how sorry i am to you.”

“you’re right,” you shrugged. “it was my fault.”

“no,” he rubbed his thumb on your skin. “it was not your fault. i’m so sorry i made you believe that.”

“when i was 15 my boyfriend at the time pressured me to have sex. we used a condom and i was in birth control but i still-i still ended up pregnant,” you began, taking a deep breath before continuing. “i couldn’t tell my mom because she would’ve kicked me out, so i saved up some money and had his mom take me to a cheap clinic. she signed as my mom and i got the procedure done. that was the end of it,” you finished tears streaming down your face. “a few weeks after the procedure i started having pains in like my lower back, but i didn’t think anything of it. so… it is my fault. i shouldn’t have gone to a cheap clinic, but i couldn’t live on the streets with a baby and no way to clothe or feed them.”

“y/n,” he got your attention, wiping the tears from your cheeks. “you were a teenager who had no other choice, love. it’s not your fault, it’s the clinic’s.”

“i just… it hurts so bad, spencer,” you shook your head in defeat before he wrapped his arms around you. “not even just emotionally, my body physically hurts so bad. i don’t know what to do and i thought i lost you and i didn’t know what i would do without you because i didn’t think you loved me anymore because it’s my fault,” you ranted out, sobbing into his shoulder before he moved the two of you around the bed to lay down, you on his chest.

“i’m so sorry you had to go through that, and that you’re still dealing with the repercussions,” he pressed a kiss to your forehead. “but know that i’m not leaving you. i love you and nothing will ever change that.”

“there’s nothing we can do now,” you whined, clutching to his shirt as if he’d disappear once more.

“we can go to the recommended therapy. we can get that surgery to fix your cervix,” he reminded you, rubbing circles onto your back as you sniffled. “then, if you’d like, we could try again for a baby.”

“so you still want to be with me?” you whispered by his ear, clearly worried of the answer.

“of course i do,” he said as if there were no other option; there wasn’t. “i’m so, so sorry, love.”

“the reason i didn’t tell you is because,” you sighed as you shuffled on top of spencer, now sitting on his lap and facing him. “because there’s this stigma that comes with having an abortion - and i didn’t know how you’d react. i also didn’t know it didn’t go well in the first place, but that’s a different story,” you chuckled. “i’m sorry. i should’ve told you about something so serious.”

“you don’t have to apologize,” he brushed a strand of hair from your face. “that was from your past. this is our future, we shouldn’t get caught up on it and allow it to ruin this.”

you nodded, “you’re right. are-are you staying here, now? or are you going back to derek’s?” there was an obvious look of hope in your eye that spencer never planned on squashing.

“i’m staying here,” he smiled. “home. you’re my home.”

“you’re so cheesy,” you rolled your eyes as a laugh left your lips.

“i’ve missed your smile,” he pressed a kiss to those very lips, your smile not going away but growing even bigger.

“i’ve missed you,” you pointed at his chest. “please don’t leave again.”

“i won’t. ever again,” you held your pinky out, he smiled and wrapped his own around it. “i’m so sorry.”

“we’ll work at it,” you sighed. “we’ll build back the trust and fix my stupid cervix and then maybe try again for a baby.”

over the next few months spencer and you had been going to therapy once a week, mourning the loss of your baby and working through your other issues.

five months after you found out about the miscarriage, you had the surgery to fix your cervix.

one year after you fixed your cervix you and spencer began talking about having a child. you were extremely nervous, rightfully so. you voiced your concerns to spencer about what if the surgery didn’t work? what if your cervix wasn’t the only issue? and he replied by reminding you that you would both take this one step at a time.

seven months after having the conversation with spencer about having children, a miracle had caught up to you.

you were pregnant.

taglist:

@averyhotchner

@greenprisca

@muffin-cup

@spenxerslut

@spencerreid9

@spencyreidpls

@spencerreid9

@spencersmagic

@calm-and-doctor

@the-local-pendeja

@spencersrose

@spencersmagic

@shemarmooresfedora

@pastelbabygirl19

if you’d like to be added to the taglist, please don’t hesitate to message me or leave a comment!

[moogey-likes-things]

The gangs reaction to y/n coming back to the pizzeria, after a month and some, of being at the hospital? I had a big surgery recently, and all my close friends reactions to me being back, made me think of this ^^

(HC 34)

SORRY THIS TOOK ME SO LONG! I'VE BEEN HAVING A ROUGH GO OF THINGS LATELY!

Warnings: None

Situation: The animatronics favorite employee had been out for quite some time! Finally, they return, back from a hospital stay!

REBLOGS APPRECIATED

ASKS WELCOME FOR ALL OR INDIVIDUAL CHARACTERS

Seeking an RP partner, if you're interested, lmk!

Freddy - From the first day without them he was concerned. Freddy kept track of every day down to the hour that they were gone. When he hears they have come back he hurries to find them and greet them. When he sees them and hears why they were gone he is extra careful and tender with them. He hugs them gently and offers to help them get around in any way he can. Even after they assure him they're okay he'll be on guard while he asks all sorts of questions and catches them up on the events they missed. His ears will be non stop wiggling with joy, he'll be so happy to be back by their side!

Chica – Cover your ears! Chica is so excited to see their favorite employee back that she can hardly contain herself!She'll run to them and give them all the hugs she can. She'll apologize when she learns why they were gone and take care to be more gentle from then on. She will let them know exactly how much she missed them and how happy she is that they are back. She will want to give them lots of treats and affection and she asks them all about the hospital and tells them all about everything that went on in the 'plex while they were gone.

Roxy – While she may look more patient to greet them on the outside, she is dying for them to come by and see her on the inside. She tried hard to greet them casually, but when they hug her she breaks and tells them that she missed them terribly. She will “complain” about all the ruckus that went on while they weren't around to take care of it. She'll tell them all about the other's activities, trying to make it seem like she's complaining, but in truth she wants to catch them up in her own way. She'll worry about their health, so instead of taking them for a race, they're getting their hair done. It is not optional.

Monty – His favorite employee's absence really took a toll on him. If he was grumpy before- oof, has he been in a mood! After a while, though his vigor would die off and even picking on S.T.A.F.F. Bots didn't cheer him up. When he hears that his favorite buddy had come back he is much like Freddy, rushing to find them, sometimes at the cost of things being knocked over on the way. While he wants to hug them and toss them in the air, he will hold himself back when he is made aware of their health issue. He will, however, want their full attention and steal them away from everyone and everything as son as he is able. Their day will be spent by his side likely getting spoiled.

Bonnie - Bonnie missed his favorite employee so much it hurt. His ears drooped when he thought of them and even his joking, fun nature seemed to dull. Upon their return he will greet them calmly, but there will be a lot of emotion. Yes, he might cry. His will want all the details of their medical issue and he will want to know what he can do to look after them while they're around him. He will be attentive to them every second and see to it that they do not get overwhelmed. As soon as the chance arrives, he will want cuddles somewhere safe and quiet.

Foxy – Adventures just didn't seem as fun without his first mate on deck! While he kept up a pretty good mood during their absence, he did worry daily about them. When they come back to him, he joyfully greets them and puts on a show of letting them know how much he had missed them, telling them all the things he couldn't do without them. He will offer any assistance he can to make things easier for them once he knows about their health. Of course this means that they will be offered extra cuddles. Foxy will be glad to find a calm, dark corner somewhere for them to snuggle and hide in. He'll even allow them to use his fluffy tail for a pillow, just wanting them to be safe.

Sun – This poor guy did nearly nothing but fret and worry every second he was not caring for a kid. He ran over a million possibilities in his head. When he sees them again he will break down in a tirade of tears and platitudes. He'll have all the questions for them. He'll also have lots of pictures and cards he and the kids made for them. Of course, being well versed in first aid, he will be vigilant and take a motherly role in caring for them while they are around. He'll be sure to keep them extra safe even if it gets on their nerves! The best thing for him at that point will be lots of reassurance and lovin's, which he will take with plenty of giggles.

Moon – Somber barely describes his feelings while he wonders what has kept his favorite employee away. While he never neglects the kids he finds little comfort in his normal routines, even Foxy only cheers him up so much. When his pal walks back through those doors he swoops in and greets them with a long, tender hug. It will be obvious that he'll need to fight back emotion, but he won't care much. Like Sun he'll want all the details and then he'll keep them safe and away from anything that may cause them distress or injury. His cuddles are the most comfortable and he will hum, sing, or read to his buddy while they rest and ensure that they are fully aware of how much he cares for them and missed them.

DJ – The long absence of his favorite little friend takes a toll on his music while they're gone. While he still keeps the parties hopping and fun the stuff he plays when alone is soft and longing, waiting impatiently for his friend to come back. He has to be told beforehand that they are returning from the hospital, that way when he scoops them from the ground he knows to be gentle and careful. He will let them tell him about their time off at their own pace, and he isn't much for gossip, so he'll likely hold onto his dear friend for a long time, playing happier tunes and just relaxing, feeling happy and whole again.

[wysteriaisapenguin]

Every Little Thing I Do - Part 2

After over-exhausting himself from pulling a heavy passenger train, Edward needed some time to recover. This left everyone worried about him. After everything he’s done, they decided it was about time for them to show him their support in their own way.

(Railway Roundabout AU - Post “Edward’s Exploit”. See Part 1 here!)

Edward was lying in his bed, reading a book about paranormal phenomenon. The nurses were kind enough to offer him several books that he could read while he recovered. The surgery had been a success and he should be able to walk again so that he could get back to work on the railway. But for now, his left leg was still limp and he couldn’t leave his bed at all. Had it really been worth the risk?  

He tried not to think about it and continued reading. Then he heard a knock on the door and a nurse entered to tell him something. “Mr. Pettigrew, there are a few guests who are here to see you.” 

Edward made a mental note on where he last left off and put his book on the counter. He nodded to let her know that they can come in. Was it Thomas and Percy? It had to be them. He had a strong feeling that out of all of his coworkers, they would be the ones to see him first. As the nurse left, he didn’t expect a few more guests were incoming. 

“SURPRISE!!!”

Edward was certainly surprised. “My word!” he gasped, “What are you all doing here?” His question was met with a horde of answers by the sudden crowd.

 “We came here to see you of course!” 

“Everyone’s been talking about what happened. Thank goodness you’re safe!” 

“Dear Edward, you must be so exhausted. Please get as much rest as you need.” 

“You should have seen the looks of those jerks! You sure showed them!” 

“Goodness, is your leg ok? I hope it’s not entirely broken!” 

“Aye ye better recover soon! The sheds have been quiet without’chya!” 

“Mr.Edward! Please don’t die on us! We’ll miss you if you do!!!” 

“Yeah and don’t haunt us while you’re at it!” 

Edward was overwhelmed by all the thoughtful remarks he was getting. And why wouldn’t he be? Everyone he knew came all this way just to check on him. He didn’t want them to worry about him, but he knew for a fact that they were, in fact, worried. That was why they were all here. Well…almost everyone. He knew exactly who didn’t show up, but decided not to question it. Instead, he had to focus on the people who were here for him now.  

“Thank you all for coming,” he started to speak up. “I appreciate all of your support with all my heart.” 

“Don’t mention it!” Thomas replied cheerfully and then put his hand on Percy’s shoulder. “And you have Percy to thank, cause this was all his idea!” 

“What? Percy?” As Edward turned to see the little driver looking bashful. Everyone else turned to him as well. Thomas nudged his best friend to say something until he finally did. 

“Yes it was me! I just thought it’d be a nice surprise for you!” Percy gave a slight smile but Edward could tell that he was nervous, given how he was holding his hands and fidgeting them. Edward smiled back and said, “Why Percy, how sweet and thoughtful of you! I didn’t know you had such a bright little mind in that head of your’s!” 

Percy’s eyes shined like they were bright stars in the night sky. Edward knew that he was eager to hear more, so he continued. “Thank you so much. I think you’ve been working just as hard as me. I’ve never been more proud of you.” 

“Yes sir! Thank you sir!” Percy chirped his usual thanks and everyone cheered. Edward cheered as well. He did mean it; He knew how Percy had gotten himself into a lot of situations lately, both good and bad. But he was certain that the young man will keep going and continue to do greater things. It would be a delight to see. And it was just as much of a delight to have so many wonderful friends openly show their support to him. He was determined to recover for their sake.   

---

Edward was on the last chapter of his book. Perfect timing. It was getting late so if he finished this one, he should be ready to sleep for the night soon. Before he could start reading the first page, he heard a few voices from outside. One of them sounded familiar, but he wasn’t quite sure if it was who he thought it was. Then he heard a knock on the door and put his book down. A man in a long green coat, messy long hair, and a forlorn expression entered the room.  

“Henry?”

“Edward,” Henry’s voice filled with concern. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine, don’t worry about me,” Edward smiled softly, but he really didn’t want any more people to worry about him. “I’m surprised to see you here.”

Henry looked nervous as he tried to explain himself. “Well, I just wanted to see you. I’ve been worried sick about you all day and I was so busy I didn’t even get the chance to see you.”

“Really?” Edward was puzzled to hear that. “Did Percy not tell you?”

“Tell me about what?”

“That he was going to bring everyone here earlier today.”

“What?! I haven’t heard of that!” Henry seemed genuinely shocked about being excluded from the afternoon visit. But Edward swore he could hear him huff under his breath, “Damnit it Percy, I’ll get you for this…”

“I figured,” he sighed but gave another patient smile. “But still, I’m glad you’re here now.”

Henry laughed sheepishly and remarked, “Well, it’s better than nothing I suppose.” He then walked closer towards Edward’s side and stood there. He looked as if he had something to say but was trying to remember. There must be a lot of thoughts going on in his mind. Edward patted the bed to let him know that he was allowed to sit. Henry did just that. They both waited in silence until he finally spoke.

“When I saw you at the station all tired and dreary, you still had a bright smile on your face. I know you were proud, but I couldn’t stop worrying about you, even while I was taking all the passengers home. And when I heard that you collapsed after you returned to the sheds, it felt like my heart dropped. I had no idea all of that happened.”

Edward didn’t know what to say. So even Henry was worried about him. After hearing him, Gordon, and James mock him for the umpteenth time, he had assumed that they wouldn’t take his triumph seriously. But it seemed like Henry did after all and he felt a sense a relief. Edward took a deep breath to collect his thoughts about that fateful night.

“I will admit, it was a difficult situation. I felt like I was going to die if I kept on going. But I knew that I had to. It was the only way to get everyone back home safely. I couldn’t let everyone down.”  

“I know. You’re always so determined to do the right thing, even if it seems impossible.”

“I almost couldn’t believe it myself. Once I knew it was all over, I knew that I’ve done something great. And I’m sure I was able to prove that to everyone.”

“Of course you did, you sure showed me.”

“I’m really thankful for everyone showing up to see me today,” Edward couldn’t help reminiscing and he was happy that Henry was listening. But the more he thought about it, the more his happier feeling started to fade. “But at the same time, I made them worry sick about me. I even made you worry. Do you really think I’ve done the right thing?”

“Of course you did Eddie. You did what you had to do.”

“Thank you Henry.” It wasn’t much but Edward felt reassured anyway. The two remained in silence again. He wasn’t sure what else to say so he waited for Henry to get more of his thoughts out. He was sure that there was a lot more. And he was right. Henry spoke again, “That’s why I wanted to say that I’m sorry.”

Edward turned to him with a serious expression, but Henry didn’t look at him. He just continued to look down. After a pause, the other man eventually turned around to say more. “I’ve been putting you down for such a long time. I just couldn’t find it in me to stop myself from doing so. I want to take it all back.”

“Is it because you wanted Gordon’s approval?” It pained Edward to say that, but knowing how self-important Gordon had been for the past year, it was hard to deny it.

“Yes, but now it’s meaningless to me.” At this point, Henry started to tremble and a pang of guilt could be heard from his voice. “Especially when I look back at the way he’s been treating you.”

“I see...”

Edward didn’t even need to say it, but the way his gentle eyes were filled with understanding was enough to confirm that Henry was forgiven. But Henry couldn’t accept that. He didn’t deserve it. He had been so awful to his closest friend and yet here he was being forgiven for everything he had done. He couldn’t take it anymore.

“Edward, please don’t give me that look! I can’t do it!” He cried out. Edward was startled by the sudden cry, but he continued. “There’s no way for me to be better. I thought I could be after I recovered, but I just keep getting worse and worse! And all this time, I did nothing but hurt you!”

“Henry?”  

“Is it too late for me? To be a better person? Because I don’t think…I’m strong enough…to do that…”

Henry’s words trailed off as he sobbed uncontrollably. Edward could feel his heart breaking as he watched his dear friend deep in sorrow. He knew what Henry had been through. And he knew that Henry wanted a reason to live. A purpose that made him feel important. A confirmation that he was loved. Edward wasn’t sure if he could provide him all of that, but seeing him like this made him truly want to.

He leaned in closer and caressed Henry’s face. The other man stopped sobbing but his tears continued to fall from his dreary eyes. As Edward gently wiped them away, he murmured in a soothing voice, “You are strong. The fact that you’re here now is enough to prove to me that you can be better.”

“But…what if it’s not enough?”

“It is enough.” He closed his eyes and leaned in closer until their foreheads touched. “And even if you don’t believe in yourself, I believe in you. I always will.”  

The two stayed silent once more. Then Edward could feel a warm hand touch his and heard a quiet whisper: “Thank you.”

Edward smiled. He wanted this moment between them to last for a while. He wanted Henry to know that despite everything that happened, despite all the hurt and pain that he endured, he still loved him. It put his heart at ease that Henry was finally able to understand all of that.