#this was a really interesting question to think about; thank you :00

[ashwii]

How long do you typically spend on a drawing?

Of the ones you've posted, which took the longest? Which was the quickest?

Ohhh, that's a good question. I suppose it really depends on the drawing :00

Honestly, I dont spend anywhere near as long on drawings as i did a year a two ago (which comes with pros and cons — i feel like i haven't really made a "mona lisa" in forever that i can be super proud of, but on the other hand i'm overall just quicker at getting paintings done now)

[Going from left to right♡]

The first one (done a little over a year ago) I remember taking me a good couple of weeks to complete. HOURS upon hours were spent on that water trying to make it look perfect, and tbh I'm not super into the water looks anymore anyway XD. Lots of things i dont really like about the piece anymore, but i haven't really made anything since that I think is a suitable replacement for a pfp haha

Second guy (6 months after the first one) i think took me a couple days? Spent an evening doing the sketch and line art, and I think I spent the next evening doing the coloring and painting. I dont think I like the colors as much as the first one, but i dont think I dislike them enough to warrant multiple weeks worth of working on a drawing, lmao

And then the third boy, the one i posted a few hours ago. I think i spent a lil less than an hour on him?? That one's just a doodle — no background or real composition in mind like the other two drawings, just wanted to scribble the boy, hehe. Like I said, it depends on the drawing!!

[otomehonyaku]

DIABOLIK LOVERS Haunted Dark Bridal ☽ Genteiban DVD Mini Drama Translation ☽ Side Story II (Kanato, Reiji, Subaru)

Original title: DIABOLIK LOVERS 限定版 SPECIAL DISK III Side Story II Voiced by Kaji Yūki (Kanato), Konishi Katsuyuki (Reiji), Kondo Takashi (Subaru) English translation by @otomehonyaku Click here for the audio (special thanks to @uzi-boozii for providing the audio!)

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Please do not reuse or post my translations elsewhere or translate my work into other languages without my permission.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Another interesting little drama CD (♡ˊ͈ ꒳ ˋ͈) I love these 'behind the scenes' mini drama set in between certain events of the anime. This particular one takes place after Kanato takes Yui to his wax doll room! Please enjoy (ㅅ´ ˘ `)

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

[This CD takes place after Kanato takes Yui into his wax doll room.]

00:00 [Reiji lifts his cup of tea and takes a sip.]

Reiji: Hm. There is nothing quite like English tea. This aroma, this flavour… No other country’s tea could accomplish this.

Kanato: You sure seem like you’re enjoying drinking that bland-looking liquid. I certainly would not. Right, Teddy? Cold days like this just make you crave exceptionally sweet chocolate milk. Ah, shall I call her over and have her make chocolate milk for me?

R: Wait, Kanato. Why did you, of all occasions, decide to call on me during my tea time? This is my one moment of relaxation in the day. Do you not understand? You have something to say to me, do you not? 

01:09 K: Me? To you, Reiji? I wouldn’t know what. Teddy says he has no clue, either.

R: Really? Nothing comes to mind at all?

K: I just told you, I don’t know.

R: You clearly lack self-reflective behaviour.

K: I couldn't care less about your expectations. I hate being kept in suspense. I am holding off on my precious hot chocolate by listening to your useless sermon, so please explain properly.

R: Kanato. Listen to me.

K: I want her to make me hot chocolate, and quickly! I want to drill her to make chocolate milk with the exact amount of sweetness that I prefer! That is her duty!

[Kanato slams his fist on the table.]

02:00R: Kanato. That is precisely the problem.

K: A problem? What is? I may do with my dolls as I please.

R: She is not your doll. Your reasoning that you can do with her as you please is incorrect. So, you cannot expect me to let slide the improper behaviour you exhibited yesterday.

K: What are you saying that I did?

R: I am talking about what you did in the wax doll room. You were trying to turn her into a wax doll, were you not?

K: And what about it? Don’t you think she would look extraordinary as a corpse? Hey, Teddy. You’re glad you’ve made a friend too, right?

R: It seems as though you do not realise the weight of your actions.

K: What’s wrong with turning her into a wax doll? I was only trying to preserve her beauty so that she may live on for all eternity.

R: Wax dolls are not alive, Kanato. You, of all people, should know.

03:16K: I don’t care whether she lives or not. As long as she’s beautiful, that’s enough for me.

R: We are under strict orders not to kill her. Have you forgotten? We must obey Father’s orders. We cannot go against him. You know this, do you not? I think we should treat her with a certain level of care.

K: What makes you say that, even though we never received such orders for the other sacrificial brides? Do you not think that is strange, Reiji?

R: Orders should be followed. I follow them without question.

04:09K: Hehe. You understand that she’s special, don’t you, Reiji?

R: What do you mean?

K: Her blood smelled quite… nostalgic somehow. I was plagued by the strangest feeling, as if a distant memory had come back to me. Didn’t you feel it too, Reiji?

Right, Teddy?

R: I did not. She is merely prey. Nothing more, nothing less. I do not recall ever thinking something so imperfect is special.

K: Hehe. Do you really think so?

[Something cracks, debris falling to the ground.]

K: Hm?

R: There are cracks in the sealing… Is that Subaru again? I will go and check on him. Wait here. Understood? We are not done talking.

[Reiji walks off.]

K: Huh. Subaru has been acting off lately. Teddy, should we go and have a look as well? It’s exciting to watch our home crumble to dust, isn’t it?

05:45[Reiji walks into Subaru’s room.]

R: Subaru. What on Earth are you doing?

Subaru: Fuck off. Don’t barge into my room without permission.

R: By all means–go ahead and break your own belongings. However, this house is not just yours. I cannot stand idly by and watch you destroy it.

S: Shut up.

K: Oh, Teddy, look! Subaru broke the desk again. This room does not need furniture, does it?

S: Fuck off, you little hysteric brat. You get the fuck out, too!

[Subaru tries to push Kanato out of the room.]

K: Teddy? You should never use such words, okay? People may start to question your dignity if you do.

S: The fuck?

R: Kanato, I thought I told you to stay put downstairs.

K: It may go wherever I please. I will not let you order me around.

S: You fuckers, get out of my room with your whining.

K: If you can’t calm down, I won’t be able to enjoy my hot chocolate in peace.

S: Then don’t drink it!

[Subaru throws something.]

06:57R: Subaru! I keep having to take care of things every time you break the wall or a piece of furniture. Please consider my efforts as well.

S: No problem if it’s replaced with something new, right?

R: That is not the problem. Please understand.

[Subaru walks over to his iron maiden.]

S: Fuck off. I’m going to sleep. Hurry up and get out of here.

R: Wait.

[Reiji tries to hold the lid open.]

S: Get out of my way!

R: Do you not think your destructive behaviour has increased lately?

S: So what if it has?

K: I do have a feeling why, though.

S: Huh?

K: It’s her, isn’t it? When I think of drastic changes to our household recently, I can only think of her arrival. Hehe. You have taken a liking to her too, haven’t you, Subaru?

S: Fuck off. I have zero interest in her.

R: Oh? That sure is strange.

S: Why? 

R: If you have no interest in her, why did you give her your precious silver knife?

K: The silver knife–the one thing that can end the eternal lives of us vampires. I wonder what he was thinking when he gave it to her, don’t you, Teddy?

08:16 S: Shut up. Stop fussing so much. I am the one who decides what I do with my own knife!

R: That certainly depends on the situation. Besides, you even aided her in running away. It seems to me that you should get a proper grip on what is happening in this house right now.

S: I hate this.

R: However, I believe it is best to act only after properly assessing the other party. In reality, she did not escape, even when you offered her a way out.

S: Hm.

R: I have no clue why, though. Good grief, human life is such a finite thing. Whydo humans only repeat such pointless behaviour? Truly pitiful.

S: I wonder.

R: About what?

S: If you naively assume that she’s a mere human, it’ll come back to bite you.

K: Hehe. Hey, Reiji. I told you! There’s something about her. Something special…

S: Besides, ever since she arrived, Richter has been here often, too.

09:43 R: Indeed. I have seen Uncle around often lately. Subaru. Has Uncle told you anything?

S: ‘Before long, the awakening will come,’ or something like that.

R: Is that what he said?

S: C’mon, the two of you are so annoying! Get the hell out of here already!

R: This is enough for today. The two of you. Please think thoroughly before you act from now on.

[Subaru closes his coffin. Kanato yawns.]

K: You’re tired, aren’t you, Teddy? Let’s go and rest in our favourite little place.

[Kanato leaves.]

R: Good grief. I should not wait and instead take care of things today. The next time, I will show no mercy. And even then, what on Earth did Uncle mean? It seems that I should look further into it.

11:00 K: Hey, look, Teddy. This pure white dress… I had it especially made for the occasion. This feeling, this texture, and this lustrous finish… Haha. I can truly envision the day when she wears it among all the others. I already have a spot for her in mind.As Reiji said, I shall think thoroughly before I act… Haha!

[goquokka00]

Stray Kids on Weed

The Hyunjin Strain In which the love of their life smokes the mary jane, and they give it a shot for the first time...

Bangchan | Minho | Changbin | Hyunjin Jisung | Felix | Seungmin | Jeongin

A Few Notes: This is purely just supposed to be funny and a joke. I've also never been high and while I am friends with those who have either tried weed or do weed on the regular, I only know so much. So please just bear with me and have a good laugh, okay? Okay. Love you guys ❤️❤️❤️

Funnily enough, Hyunjin's first ever experience with weed was because you had asked him if he wanted to try. The reason why you might ask? Simple. Hyunjin had commented on your bong that you had, which was made of a marble-colored glass and was honestly really pretty. Hyunjin had said it was pretty and asked how the bong even worked. And once you had finished explaining, you had asked the question of, "you wanna try?"

Sure enough, Hyunjin tried. And his high was...unique.

See, Hyunjin, when high, is one of those over-analytic people who theorize literally anything and everything. Like, he is spitting absolute nonsense and making it sound like the most interesting topic ever. And I'm not kidding.

Like, this man was going on and on and on about how "earth was earth" and that "Us humans? We're all originally made from earth. God literally told us in the bible, you know? And when we die, we...we're just buried into the earth again. And in reality, everyone should really get along because in reality, we're all one in the same. We're all just earth, and so is literally everyone else. So we should be getting along, but we don't. Like, don't you think that's just completely out of wack?"

And this isn't even one of the topics he covers. He goes on these pointless tangents about literally anything and everything. Why Stray Kids is called Stray Kids when literally nobody in the group was a minor, why people called others pussies as an insult when he (and him specifically) likes it so much, what the true meaning of love was, etc.

Now, when he's doing his analyzing and tangents, he's sitting the entire time. He's so busy thinking and over analyzing and tangent-ing that his body literally just...can't function anymore. It doesn't mean he doesn't try to get up and move, though. It just...doesn't go well. He ends up falling like a newborn horse trying to walk again. It just...it doesn't go well.

So. Does Hyunjin give weed more chances? Well...yeah, actually. Does he do it through the bong? Not necessarily. I think that if he were to do weed again, he might just do edibles. But he did say that some of the topics he talked about when high would honestly make good songs. And so, he'd probably go back to it...so long as you're there to write down or record whatever dumb topics he decides he needs to cover when he's on the high ride of a lifetime.

Hey! Firstly, thank you so much for reading this post, and I really hope you enjoyed! If you did, please like, reblog, or comment so I can see how I'm doing with writing and getting feedback! I hope you have a lovely day! Sleep well, stay in good health, and eat something if you haven't! ❤️❤️❤️

Taglist: @miss-daisy04 @kayleefriedchicken @wolfs-archive @stayyyyyyyyyyyy21 @wolfs-howling @rose-w-00-d

[ckret2]

i’m admittedly obsessed with music/have music as a special interest so this question has been on my mind for quite some time now - if Bill (from your goldilocks fanfic) were to listen to any music, or have any particular music taste, what would it be? Any particular songs in mind that he likes? ( <—totally not looking for more/new songs to listen to hahahahaha…sweats)

half of me thinks he’d like 40s/50’s/60’s music (thanks to the vera lynn reference in the fic, but also bc he sings it in-show), but the other half of me wants him to like musicals (heathers, in particular) - i can’t explain why lol

alternatively, if you’ve answered smth like this already, i’d love to know what songs you enjoy/listen to!

Have a post about his tastes and a hideous-sounding playlist! And it even held up in the face of TBOB.

The only difference in my headcanons is that I said the peak of his his tastes centers on the 60s and I subsequently found an interview where Alex confirms Bill's tastes do indeed range from about 40s~60s; but I just got out of another fandom where everyone headcanoned a character is into 40s music ranging into the 50s and I'm pretty burnt out on The Most Popular 40s Jazz That Everybody And Their Grandma Knows so I still personally prefer to focus on the 50s for him lmao.

In fic he makes a reference to a band called Mysterious Mo's Average Joes; I imagine them as an in universe equivalent to Question Mark & the Mysterians, except more obscure.

Specific to my headcanoned music tastes of Bill from my fic rather than just Bill in general: coming in his tastes are all the same, but hanging around Mabel has given him an expanded palate for boy band music and kids music, although on the boy band front he prefers dance-y songs over ballad-y songs and on the kids music front he has to steer through a minefield of cheaply-produced 80s cartoons that use synthesized music to save cost on an orchestra.

So far, nothing else has happened to change his tastes.

Although eventually Robbie's introducing him to emo.

I listen to too much music for the question "what songs do you listen to," it's like asking "what words do you use" lmao, lemme look at my recent activity. Lately I've been getting into She Hates Emotion and the new albums by Zeal & Ardor and Fleshgod Apocalypse; I've been slacking in my metal education on learning the difference between black metal and death metal (I usually focus on symphonic metal & neighboring genres) so I'm looping back to the basics to learn more there; big fan of Saltatio Mortis's new album; I've been listening to the deeper cuts & newer material of mainstream early 00s alt rock & nu metal bands (Shinedown, Stone Sour, Staind) to see what I've been missing out on beyond their radio hits; and in general the past few months I've been trawling through playlists of classic 80s goth, dark wave, synth pop, & aggrotech to expand my library there. Very excited for the new Linkin Park lineup, love their new vocalist so far and it's heartening to see them releasing new material. Not so excited by the new Nightwish album, it has the nightwish sound but not the spark. This isn't even an accurate representation of my full musical tastes, I've just been really into metal recently. Current favorite bands of the last few years are Alt-J and Ghost. I listed some of my favorite albums on this post. It's too bad you can't just link your Spotify liked songs without sticking them all in a separate playlist—oh hold on I have a songs I can sing playlist, it's perpetually incomplete on top of being 3-4 years out of date but it's a starting point.

[creaturefeaster]

what would ids in stolla look like? i wanted to make some for ocs and was wondering if you had an idea for them

I think this is a really cool question, because it's not something I've ever considered in detail before until now.

Graphically, the background would probably be a little more interesting, but I made this quickly on my laptop so I was artistically limited-- here:

IDs of the Talpian Dominion, as well as Sunkeep, would vary from this design as they are sovereign to Stolla, but still function independently. I can try and make IDs for them in the future if it interests, but for now I figure this ID is pretty catch-all otherwise.

So a (mostly) filled out ID would look like this:

There's probably some stuff I'd tack on if I had more time to design this, such as a blood type identifier, and personally I'd find it cooler if it wasn't a standard rectangle shape, but this design was based on real world IDs, and I think this still gets most of what you'd need to know across for now.

If you're curious about the exact details on how an ID is produced, I'll explain below the readmore.

DI: Date Issued. Looking back on this, there should probably be an expiration date, perhaps on the lower right corner. ^^

SEX: Dependent on race. Many races have dimorphism similar to humans... more or less, though some (Vixen, Normals, etc.) have a wider range of sexes and are labeled as such.

The most common identifiers you would see on an ID would be: X(nondescript), F(female), M(male), MX(monolex, for some plant people).

EYES: No. of eyes, and color

HAIR: Natural hair color

HGT: Height on record

WGT: Weight on record

ELMT: Whether or not this person has elemental capabilities.

X is the lack of the elemental method, E/A/W/F are indicators of Earthen, Air, Water, and Fire elemental individuals. Typically you would only see this on races that are in touch with a certain element. For instance, many plant people are elementally inclined towards earth, and therefore would be labeled as E if they are found to have this connection.

RC: Residential ID code, has 18 to 19 digits, and can be decoded as such:

00 , 0000, 00.00.0000 , 00, 00.0

TR, NEID, DD.MM.YYYY, DI, RI.A

TR: Territory.

Each territory is labeled 00 through 14, the Talpian Dominon & Sunkeep are not in the registry.

NEID: Name Entry in Database.

Number of people active and registered with this exact name to date, within the territory.

DDMMYYYY: Birthdate.

DI: Day of the month this card was issued (Ignore the fact that I entered this part of April's ID incorrectly ._.)

RI(A): Racial identity marker, and affliction if applicable.

Races are listed from 11 through 28, noting 18 recognized races within Stolla. (A) is marked as a 0 unless afflicted as a vampire, zombie, or were-animal. It is very rare to see IDs with positive affliction markers, as very few are able to achieve legality. I probably don't need to mention that it's telling enough on it's own that there's a marker for affliction at all.

Each territory has it's own emblem, but I don't really have those fleshed out right now so it stays blank for now, haha.

Date of birth is listed under the emblem on the right side, and beneath that is their race in print.

Markers are for things like you would see on our cards in real life. Donors, veterans, notable allergies, etc.

Like I said, this isn't something I've thought about really until I read this ask this morning, so it's not what I would call a finalized version, but you can assume the data entry would all work the same, even if I did adjust the design a bit down the line.

Thanks for this question 🖤

[sarahivi]

This is a loong interview, i'll try to translate some parts

Min 0:00 - 8:12

Pati – In This occasion I have the huge privilege that in front of me is one of the most important actors in the last decades in this country and I’m talking about Tenoch Huerta. Welcome to the YouTube channel, thank you so much for being here, however only few people know that your first job after you finished the career of journalism in UNAM was of cameramen here in Azteca, how did you get here?

Tenoch – That’s right, some friends, well I was learning in a cable channel and some friend came here, the calls were opened for “La academia” and I came here as cameramen, and it has been one of the funniest experiences in my life

P – Really, why?

T – I loved it, I loved the camera, in fact I have thought if I wasn’t an actor I would have end up as camera director or film photographer

P – But you decided to be in front of the screen, it was to please your dad or because truly the interest of being an actor was born in you

T – Taking the classes was a little so my dad stopped bothering me ,truly, cause it wasn’t to “please him”, my parents are more like do whatever you want as long it makes you happy, so it was so he stopped bothering me, but I liked it and I remember that once I asked him, why you insisted so much? and he told me, because I saw something in you, and I was satisfied with his answer, above all the first part “I saw you” my dad was looking at me and it was like, lovely my dad has always been looking at me and with that I was saved of a lot of traumas and a lot of money from therapy

P – but I don’t think you save money because I heard that you are in therapy

T – Yes, usually I go to therapy, it is a personal discipline, but now it has had to be a little stronger

P – Why?

T – because dragging a lot of topics, evidently everything that happened to me in the last couple of years, are situations of a lot of stress, because not only hits you, it hits your entire family environment.

P – We are talking about Miss Rios case?

T – Yes, because with this accusations my life, my career and my work and family environment were affected, and the hardest part is when you face a lie , when there is a lie, when there are inaccurate data, and the worst part of a lie is not the lie itself, A totally fictitious construction, but when you take elements that are real and misrepresent them and move them so they can fit with things , that's the worst part because even the person that is receiving the attack, in this case myself, it puts you in a state of alert, confusion, pain, you question yourself a lot of things, even there is a self-punishment, a lot of thing mixing and for that you need a therapy

P – What kind of relationship you had with her?

T – we were colleagues in Poder Prieto, I admired her, I hadn't had the pleasure of meeting her, then we attended an event, some collectives were invited and we met there, that’s when we started to get close and at first she seems like a fun girl, very strong, very attractive too and that’s it, the relationship was always like a relationship that was not exclusive

P – An open relationship

T – An open relationship yes

P – So you had relations but you both could have other relationships

T – Yes, even that, I mean in all groups there are other groups of closer friends, in this group of closer friends she told us that she was seeing other people, which it was ok, I too saw other people, there was no problem, simply maybe it was something that we should have talked more precisely, put labels

P – Exactly

T – It could be that, but anyway, not putting labels doesn’t give you the right to destroy a person's life, so that was the kind of relationship, it lasted a few months until there started to be some attitudes, more aggressive.

P – From her?

T – Yes, there was a moment where I got closer to a colleague that is my age, we saw the same cartoons when we were kids and it was fun to talk, and she didn’t like it even if this colleague was only a friend, also it was a friend of hers, and this kind of frictions started to show a weird behavior from her, until she started to attack me within the collective

P – So first was an attack, let’s say in relation with the person within the collective, without posting it on twitter nor social media

T – Nothing, and that’s when I talked to her, we met in a park and in this conversation that we had, she suddenly told me, we were talking and suddenly told me “ ok enough, what are you willing to give to calm all of this?” and I told her, a public apology if you want , I can talk with the people, I don’t know you tell me , I thought that we didn’t have a problem, simply we should have talked more, I don’t know but whatever you say and that was it, some time later when everything exploded and I’m in a huge stressful moment, I had a reunion with some friends, I met a person, that maybe by fate he was sitting next to me and he is a therapist specialized in supporting families that are victims of extortion and kidnaps , so in the conversation the topic arose , I told him and he said, in my experience that was an extortion, the “what are you willing to give?” and I told him “ she didn’t ask for money” and he told me, no, the professionals are very subtle , anyway he didn’t know my case in detail, so I simply took it from there, then time passed, we found some information, the lawyers started investigating, we realized that indeed there were shady things of which I cannot point directly to someone because it will be doing the same that was done to me, I only can say that there are proof that are verifiable, file numbers, and that’s the job of the authority to get to the bottom of those affairs that have years, there are files that have more than 10 years

Update 8:12 - 20:32mins

P – What were the legal actions that you took

T – Legal actions, first I got a solid lawyers team in different stages, a 1st stage was a team of lawyers then a 2nd stage another team of lawyers even in USA, 1st the lawyers, they gatherd information , but also put some legal mechanisms of which I can not talk about but are legal mechanisms that are activated that are carried out, that are like a kind of, I don't know what to really call it, it's like a kind of antecedent, like putting a warning, like that there is a record that this is happening those actions have been carried out, but more important we have been monitoring this last year, 2 years, every week if there is something against me if there is a lawsuit, a complaint, something

P – She has not raise a complaint

T – No one, there is nothing against me , I don’t even have traffic violations.

P – Tenoch, what happen with you when suddenly in social media they are lynching you?

T – Is painful, is scary because once someone filter information about my daughters, with pictures and more , and in anonymity is hard to track , when the lynching started, from real people , bots, troll and more they start to attack my family , we received some direct threats that threatened the integrity of members of my family, and things of that kind so you put yourself in a state of permanent alert, you can’t let your guard down , and as i told my team, is like carrying a dragon breathing in your ear all the time , that you don’t know what might happen because with the topic of anonymous complaints you can take advantage of that, I understand where is coming from, I understand from the desperation of a lot of people that cannot achieve justice for many reasons sometimes they are only left with this, then there is a whole system that favors the men that provokes that people have to resort to this methods that at the beginning might sound good that I even say that, yes they are there for something but when you take advantage of them, you start to use it for personal purposes, politics, economic, electoral or to have better jobs, is when it start to be a problem, because is public, there is no need to prove anything there is non an authority to tell you , mr please you came to make an accusation, if you don’t show proof doesn’t proceed and if does not proceed you are affecting this person , those mechanisms doesn’t exist in social media, simply people believes it or not and that’s it, it’s over, there is no contrast, there is not a method to see if this works, to see if this is real or not and that’s the problem, I think the problem, not talking about my case, talking in general that i also want to clarify that I’d like that my case is not used to demerit the feminist movement,

P – Those are different things

T – Absolutely, and I’m glad that you are saying it, because it comes from a woman and it’s ok, and are different things, the feminist fight and the media lynching are 2 different things that’s why I don’t want that my case is taken to demerit the other, also I understand the reason why there are anonymous complaints and public complaints , but there are not regulated

P – they are not valid

T – they are not valid, and they are being used for other purposes , I think there should be another protocol , I don’t know, for example in usa to make a complaint first I have to have a formal complaint or lawsuit before the authorities, and then with my file in hand I can make a public complaint, not here in Mexico, here in Mexico you made the public complaint and if someone believes in you good and if they don’t too. I think those are the topics that are complicated and for me it was not only the personal impact, you get used to it and you take it and you say, well I’ll take care of it, the problem is when you see that your family

P – How old are your daugthers?

T – 4 and 11

P – They are so young

T – Yes, the older one had 9 and the younger one had 2, fortunately the younger one doesn’t know yet a lot of things, but the older one yes and that is so painful, also my parents,

P – They have suffered

T - *nods* my sisters

P – You being a man, this situation affected how you approach other women?

T – Yes, it affects, undoubtedly, but I’m not of the idea that things happen for a reason, I believe that things happen and you give them a reason and you take the lesson and learn from it, so the way it affected is that I tried to approach in a better way, be more careful and more selective, not everyone deserves our heart , not everyone deserves our vulnerability, not everyone deserved that we are open with them, not everyone deserves it, you have to take the time to know the person and now I’m more careful, more selective, but now I’m more clear, I have always been clear with people, I have always been like “I’m here to work, we are going to be here 2 months it might something happen between us, maybe not” you know, I have always been clear, now I’m more clear , now I’m more straight and basically I stopped interacting with many people, I’m scared that’s a reality

P – Is natural

T – there’s this alert of get to know the people little by little, I don’t interact further than a friendship ,for example at the moment I don’t have a partner , It is not my intention to have a partner in the medium or perhaps in the long term, but that’s it I have to be more careful, and yes it changes everything , changes your vision, but I believe , the people you interact with is reduced, but those relations are more rich, more profound, more beautiful, at least that’s what I have been trying to work with my therapist

P – at this moment this affected your career in a devastating way

T – Look, there were 2 things, I don’t know if I should say “fortunately” but during this period there was a strike in USA, most of my work is in USA, so is not like I was able to work anyway and the strike ended 10 months after the scandal, so anyway I didn’t had the chance to work so there was not too much problem, but once the strike is over and things started to re-activate, above all in Mexico, it becomes complicated for me , because this scares and puts in alert to producers, platforms, brands and more, even events, events that commonly actors are invited, they start to put some distance, but I don’t feel that is a distance of rejection, but more like a distance of alert, like saying look we don’t have any problem with you but solve this, the thing is to solve this topic, when we start to get the information it was like wait, here are shady things.

P – Let’s say when the bomb exploded, did you had the chance to talk with miss Rios?

T – the first time that she talked within the group, yes, I talked to her

P – But when it exploded on the internet?

T – When, the first, let’s say the first time that she talked publicly it was a week and a half, a week after I had a reunion with the president in the national palace, then when that happened it was like , wait, 2 or 3 weeks before you just sent me a beautiful message telling me that you loved me, that you admired me , that you were glad that we met she told me beautiful things in that message, after, I was in the period of interviews, tours and more (note: this was during the time of BPWF press tour) when I go back to normal, I met the president and 10 days after this appears and it was like wow, so the last communication I had with her was like “what happened?” and her replies were very aggressive, so I called the lawyers and they told me “zero contact, we understand that you want to fix things, we understand that she is important to you but us as lawyers we have to tell you that this , this cannot be fixed in a personal way, you have to stop here because from now you have to think that this person is dedicated to harm you” , we didn’t understood yet what kind of harm , that came after, when information starts coming and it was like ah! So there are bad intentions

P – at this moment you feel that you are restarting your career?

T – Yes, but not only the career, the life as well, everything and I feel , it might sound weird but I’m feeling positive, happy, and above all I feel with a lot of energy like with euphoria to start my life you know, I have always had a beautiful relationship with my daughters, but now the teenager is now a little person a little adult , with her my relationship has become super endearing, the little one always had mamitis (Mexican expression for wanting to be only with the mother) and now she has papitis (same with mamitis but with the father) so you know that

P – You spend much time with them?

T – Yes

P – You live together

T – No but the older ones is one week with me and one week with her mother

P – Are they from different mothers?

T – Yes, and the little one, she was born during the pandemic, her mother and I didn’t have anything else to do so we put ourselves to…. Kisses to her mom, she is a beauty

P – You live with her?

[eardefenders]

Sherlock & Co - Mailbag Episode 4 Transcript

00:00-00:29 *Intro Music*

00:28 John: Hello there, Mister Flatmate.

00:31 Sherlock (Resigned): What is it and why have you got your laptop?

00:34 John: It’s that time! My fine fellow-

00:34 Sherlock: For goodness sake. *sounds of him moving on furniture*

00:36 John: Oi, where you going?

00:38 Sherlock: I’m getting my cushion.

00:39 John: Your cushion?

00:40 Sherlock: Yes. Here. This one.

00:42 John: That- that’s Mariana’s.

00:45 Sherlock: Ah, it’s mine.

00:46 John: I know it’s her’s. I bought it for her for Christmas.

00:50 Sherlock: Are you sure?

00:51 John: Yes, because you don’t support Real Sociedad and she does.

00:56 Sherlock: *pause* I could.

00:57 John: Yeah, you could, but you don’t. Ok- *gibbers* It doesn’t matter. Just sit on the bloody cushion. Fine. Qs! And indeed As! Here we go. Uh, ahem, mm, just a disclaimer here, to the patrons. Um. I’m old. Uh, I’m thirty-four. If-if I see a question in the Discord, I-I just ask it. Uh, if it’s in the wrong order or i-if I’ve missed some out. It’s-it’s probably just me not seeing it. So, y’know. Right-o! Uh-Ooo! Off to a flyer here! Milque asks, “Favorite tube line?”

01:29 Sherlock: Victoria.

01:30 Yeah, Victoria. Yeah, yeah. Generally, most Londoners will give that answer. Umm, y’know clean trains, not too many stops, and some big stations on there. Y’know King’s Cross, Euston, Oxford Circus, um Victoria, obviously. Um, some other lines worth mention: Bakerloo brings a certain vibe. B-bit of a sort of kooky, deranged, but pleasant elderly uncle that doesn’t wash kind of vibe. Uh, central line is possibly the most hated, ah, especially during the summer. Um, Piccadilly gets a lot of people headed to Heathrow, so it comes with a lot of baggage. Hah! Literally clambering over suitcases on that one. The Elizabeth line is amazing, but seems to be closed or delayed most of the time. Um, so thanks for listening to TubeCast!

02:20 John: Heh, right. Next question! SaraHawke722 asks, “How do you both know Stamford?” Stamo! The Stamster! I think therefore I Stam. Heh, uh, I-I added those bits. They didn’t say that. Uh, right. Sherlock you go first.

02:36 Sherlock: I met him at St. Bart’s.

02:39 John: That’s uh Saint Bartholemew’s Hospital in London

02:42 Sherlock: I know.

02:43 John: Yes, I know, I’m just telling the listener.

02:45 Sherlock: *pause* Right… I met him at St. Bart’s. There was a study on skin grafting that he was undertaking. I initially made a number of enquiries about the study, he then hired me to work with him on it. Then after that he wanted me on other projects that I didn’t find that interesting, but *with emphasis* he did let me use the lab.

03:03 John: Great, uh ok, um, I met Stamo in Freshes week at University. Um, the University of London. W-which is kind of affiliated with UCL and King’s College London.

03:15 Sherlock: By kind of affiliated, you mean it’s for their underachieving undergrads.

03:19 John: Uh, sorry mate, what University did you go to, exactly? *silence* Yeah, right, thought so. Uh, by the way, um, few of our American listeners have mentioned that you and Victor went to college together. College in the UK is sixteen to eighteen, generally speaking. Um, but, sorry Sherlock, posh lads will sometimes call boarding school a ‘college’. Uhh, I d-I don’t know why. They also call their private boarding schools ‘public schools’. So, yeah, I know. Weird lot. Uh, anyway, yeah, met Stamo at University of London in Freshes week, we both liked football. He’s a Villa fan, Aston Villa that is. We, we kinda were, uh, both out of our depth a little bit with medical degree life, so y’know maybe stuck together. Which. Which was stupid really as you should probably attach yourself to some smartarse, but hey! Y’know! Live and learn! Uh, he started to do well at Uni. Um, he went on to y’know big-big private practice and cosmetic surgery for the most part. And I got shot at for a living, so. Yeah. Listen in school, kids. Listen in school. Uh, WeirdScience asks “Do you believe in ghosts?”

04:32 Sherlock: No. Do you?

04:33 John: Uh, no. No, no. Joff asks “Sorry to be intrusive doctor, but did you suffer any hearing loss during your army days?” Pardon? *wheezing laugh* Ha, uhh no. No, seriously, I did. Um, I burst an ear drum, twice, um, actually, in Afghanistan. I-in my right ear. Uh, thought it was fine, but then after Ukraine when I was getting a full body M.O.T. as it were, there were signs of hearing loss. Um, yeah, but I’ve been lucky I think. I hope it doesn’t get worse as I’ve built my career in audio now. So. Yeah-yeah, but uh a little. A little bit. Um, JellyBaby says, “Dogs or Cats, podboys?”

05:18 Sherlock: I prefer vermin.

05:19 John: Hm. I uh prefer dogs, through and through. Yeah. Um, y’know I like a cat, but they don’t get me. Dogs get me. Ain’t that right, Arch? Heh. Uh, don’t know where he is actually. He’s probably downstairs with Mariana. Catonk asks, “What’s your favorite musical?” We-well it won’t be ‘Cats’! Hahaha! Ahh, Sherlock, your favorite musical?

05:43 Sherlock: What’s the one with the man?

05:46 John: The. The one with the man. Um. Right. You’ve just described the entirety of art and media there.

05:54 Sherlock: He has a piano and he lives in a cave.

05:57 John: Piano in a cave?

05:59 Sherlock: There’s a girl he loves. He-he-he’s got half a face.

06:01 John: Ohh! Phantom of the Opera.

06:04 Sherlock: Yes! I thought that one was okay.

06:07: Great. Yeah, no, it’s a good’un, it’s a good’un. Good answer, I like Phantom. I like Les Mis. I know that’s a boring answer, but some incredible songs in that. Uhhh, yeah. Question via email here from Sartori, “Did you feel bad for Violet Caruthers, because I did.” Um, well yeah, I did. Um. She, uh- I-I-I don’t know how to put it, really-

06:34 Sherlock (interjecting): Had given up control of her life.

06:36 John: Yeah, it was- I don’t know- confidence shot to shit? Th-th-the truest sort of victim I think I’ve ever seen, really. She just, uh, she couldn’t grasp the wheel on her own life. Like Sherlock says. Was that why you were reluctant on that case, Sherlock?

06:55 Sherlock: Very much so. Men had muscled in and filled the gaps she had created from her own insecurity. I didn’t wish to be yet another imposing presence.

07:05 John: But we were.

07:07 Sherlock: We were. And what good did it do?

07:10 John: Saved a bloke’s life?

07:11 Sherlock: Mm, we didn’t pull the trigger but we may as well have. And we set the process in motion.

07:18 John: Welllll… right. Yeah. Okay, didn’t think this q and a session would get so deep. Um. But, yeah, t-that, uh… Welcome to True Crime! *awkward huff laugh* Yeah, we don’t always run off or cycle off into the sunset. Um. Yeah. Uh, okay. Mush-Pit asks, “How many languages do you know?”

07:47 Sherlock: Many.

07:48 John: Great.Uh, why?

07:50 Sherlock: When I was young, I often fooled myself into thinking perhaps it was my grasp of language that was the reason that I didn’t quite fit in. So, I decided to try a number of other languages to see if they worked as a better and more effective means of communication. I wondered whether the nuance and subtle signals of the English language were what was holding me back from social environments. So, I attempted other languages.

08:14 John: Right, and how did that go?

08:15 Sherlock: It’s the same. It would appear it’s nothing to do with language.

08:20 John: Yeah, I’m inclined to agree with you there. I’m rubbish with languages. Ha, it never sticks for some reason. Um, hole in my brain I think. Mariana is also a dab hand at the old languages. She cracked open a bit of Russian the other day. I nearly ducked for cover! * laughs at his own joke* Uh, *clears through* RangerPip asks, “Have you seen any of the fan content Sherlock?”

08:42 Sherlock: Yes, because you keep showing me. And sticking things on the fridge.

08:46 John: Uh, yeah because they’re cool. They’re really good mate! Just-just you wait until I show you the presentation.

08:52 Sherlock: The what?

08:53 John: Nothing. Right question via email from Unbelted, “Does the fingerprint in your logo make an ‘S’ and is that deliberate?” Yes, um is the answer to that. My idea, thanks. Uh, Jones asks, “What’s our spice tolerance?” So, um, right. Okay, yeah. I can go really spicy for Indian. Uh, I can hit the searing temperatures of the Madras and the Vindaloo no problem. Lot of Brits can actually. But I tell you what, Indonesian and Thai spicing I feel. Geez, whew, that is-is a whole different realm of spice. Um…phew. S-sherlock?

09:32 Sherlock: I like the sensation.

09:35 John. Yep, uh. Anything else to add?

09:39 Sherlock: It depends on my emotional connection to the food.

09:42 John: Of course, of course. Well, a-a-as mentioned in Gloria Scott, Sherlock will only eat certain foods if he’s in the right mood. The mood for food, heh. Uh, right-o. Few general questions asking how pancake day went. Uh, yep. No dramas. Went well. Went ‘flipping’ great. Eh? Hehe. Uh, yeah, uh oo! Questions and comments. A lot from North American Podpals, uh, about me describing a woman as ‘tasty’. Um. So, ‘tasty’ is a Carol Watson word. Uh. T-t-the sort she would use for young, handsome men that she flirts with when she can. Um, don’t know what the American equivalent would be? Um? Yeah, you know, what’s a lame word used to describe someone as good looking? Y’know what would an elderly woman use basically…get in touch! Right, another question here. Uh, by the way, when I started this whole question and answer thing, Goalhanger and I thought this would be a great way to field questions about cases. Um. Y’know about the people we meet, about the nature of the crimes we’ve dealt with, uh to fill in possible knowledge gaps, and impart little gems of information that expose the murky nature of crime. Um. Which takes us to this question from Saphhster, “John, what are your thoughts on ranch dressing?” *long pause* I mean, yeah. I like it. I like it, it’s good stuff. Um, Sherlock is nodding. Uh, it’s audio mate. Great. Thanks for your contribution. Uh, Tonky asks, “Does Sherlock have any tattoos?” Apart from my face on his bum. Heh, that’s a joke. That’s a joke, don’t write in. Sherlock, tattoos?

11:26 Sherlock: A spiral on my hip.

11:28 John: What?! Alright, well let’s see! Get it out. *sound of clothes being moved/removed* Oh, well that’s rubbish.

11:34 Sherlock: I know.

11:35 John: Why’d you get that done?

11:36 Sherlock: I-it’s scarring from falling out of bed. I had it filled in because it looked like a spiral.

11:42 John: Okay. Sarah Hawke again with a question, “What is your advice about dealing with a noisy flatmate? Would love both your takes on this lol. I’m at Uni and have a noisy and slightly annoying flatmate. Somehow I’ve agreed to live with them next year as well.” Um, okay Sara Hawke, w-

12:03 Sherlock (cutting John off): Try to tune them out as best you can. Bring in other elements to distract you from their noisiness.

12:09 John (cutting Sherlock off): Sorry, what are you doing?

12:10 Sherlock: Answering wonky-blonk’s question.

12:12 John: It’s not ‘Wonky-Blonk’, it’s Sarah Hawke. Who’s Wonky-Blonk?

12:15 Sherlock: They’re all called that.

12:17 John: Look, I live with a noisy flatmate, alright, it’s clearly directed at me.

12:20 Sherlock: They said both of us.

12:21 John: Yeah, but they added a ‘lol’, okay. That means they recognize the irony of you being asked.

12:26 Sherlock: Why?

12:27 John: Because you initiate a fucking marching band at three am every night.  Ssssake. Uh, yeah, Sarah Hawke, I would say get some earbuds. Play music. Uh, white noise is good. Um, oh, I l-looked into this. You can get quite cool soundproofing panels on Amazon. Um, they don’t look awful and they do kind of work. Sometimes. Uh, yeah, right, anyway. That’s it. Thanks for the ‘Qs’, hope you liked the ‘As’ and we will see you soon. He’s wav-He’s waving. It’s. It’s audio m- For god’s sake-

13:00-13:30 *Outro Music Plays*

[fernsnailz]

Born to Fail. Something about a lot of your more serious art almost always leaves me feeling empty in a way I can never quite describe. It’s a feeling I look for whenever I consume media so that I can have a better chance of understanding it. Maybe it’s the feeling of someone splitting me open like a butterfly and feeling the wind blow across my exposed insides. That’s the best way I can describe what it feels like when a piece of art understands a part of myself that I don’t really like and that I wish would go away. A part of myself that I instinctively tried to bury. But art like this tears it out of the ground that had long since settled over top of it, where the grass had never grown back because it poisoned the soil where it was buried. Burying it might have felt better at the time, but it feels far more liberating to lay those feelings bare and actually face them head on rather than having to deal with an ever-present dull ache. The feeling of hating someone because they are who you fear becoming, whether or not you might be happier if you accepted the parts of yourself that you hate in that other person. The feeling of hating yourself because you fear that you’re failing the purpose that was chosen for you. The feeling of hating yourself because you can’t escape certain parts of yourself that you aren’t sure whether are flaws or just fundamental parts of yourself that you only think are flaws because they don’t fit the false perception of yourself that you've built up in your head based on what you think you have to be. The you that you've grown so attached to. The feeling of hating the world because it just won’t let you win, and then realizing that all of the hate was pointless because the goal would have never made you happy and it was never attainable in the first place. The feeling of hating yourself because you make so many people uncomfortable because of a part of yourself that you can’t control, that you hate, but once again aren’t sure of how key it is to who you are. Thank you for making this. Anyways, it’s 3:00 AM; I’m going to go to bed now.

But before I do that, let me just say, I love how expressive Gemerl is. I never realized that the bulb in his forehead crest was meant to be an eye, but it makes so much sense and is so cool. I also love Eggman just being evil. Not evil in a goofy moustache-twirling kind of way. Eggman actually being a truly terrible person. It’s so investing. Thank you again for making this.

thank you so much for reading!! those difficult questions of identity are an aspect of born to fail I wanted to put a strong focus on - the question of what is truly YOU, and whether or not you can live with the aspects of yourself that you may hate. it’s a difficult reality to face, and i wanted to show that each of these characters confront it in their own way.

and yeah i really love making gemerl expressive AND really leaning into the aspects of eggman that are truly evil. his position as a creator, a visionary, even a father - it was interesting to explore how these aspects of him bear over some of the robots and mess them up. i have so many thoughts about eggman. his drive and cold intellect can make him terrifying and he’s incredibly good at deliberately manipulating the people under him, but he gets caught up in he is own ego to the point of stupidity SO often and it’s such an interesting thing to balance when writing him. so so much fun figuring that guy out

[fancyfeathers]

I am very invested in your William and author reader fanfic, I must say it is very interesting. Would it be alright if I trouble you a little?

May you write a chapter where reader has gone missing right, and reader does actually outsmart William for the very first time? to the point where HE'S the one crawling back?? and is amazed? and begging her to come back? and she's not having it.

If it is too much, you may ignore this>

Thank you. Love you sm!!!

YES!!! Omg yes, I already started thinking about this with the idea of her being in a writer’s club or friends with other authors like J.R.R. Tolkien and C.S. Lewis who would help each other with their works and what not.

So like her friends who heard about her disappearance and after writing mysteries and murders alongside her, they are completely ready to find her.

And Then There Were None (Yandere William James Moriarty /w Author Darling Masterlist)

No one would be able to tell anything was wrong at first glance when they saw William James Moriarty, to anyone outside they would see nothing wrong, to anyone besides Louis and Albert he would still behaving as normal…

But his brothers, William is on edge, but in the best way possible, like when Sherlock is at his heels and all because his darling beat him at his own game, truly remarkable. He thought that she would only be off for a week or two but over a month has passed and every time he thought he found something the trail ran cold. Then the cherry on top of it all was every hint he found that ran cold related back to her books, like she was mocking him and what he had done…

And it was thrilling.

Then one evening after William had returned home from teaching at the college, Louis had also returned home from the market and fight as he was going to unpack-

A letter fell from the basket, and it was addressed to a Professor William James Moriarty, the name inked in red pen.

Louis handed the letter off to William when he was speaking to Albert in the drawing room over tea, telling him it was in the basket but he had never knew it was there, so someone must have slipped it in. William opened the letter as he sat up straight in his chair…

“I'm where the drama unfolds with arias grand,

Where masks may conceal a mysterious hand.

Within these walls, stories old and new,

Echo in halls with a theatrical view.

Where am I found? Seek the stage's grand spree,

Where performers enchant with operatic glee.”

Meet us at the answer at 8:00 PM tomorrow night, show them the letter and they will let you in. Bring your brothers, or leave them, I really do not care.

The letter was not signed, but the riddle was written in the same red ink, slightly smeared. The answer was obvious, an opera house, the question was who sent this and why? It was clear it was connected to his darling, so hopefully this was not a trail that goes cold.

So William follows the instructions hoping alone since this was obviously going to be a passive encounter since it was in public, and upon arriving to the theater and seeing all the members of the audience flocking inside, the sender was among the crowd.

While the other patrons showed their tickets to the staff at the door, he showed the letter and a small smile comes across the man’s face as he tells William to go to box five and that they were already waiting for them. Then as William made his way to the box and pushes open the door to see two individuals, a gentlemen reading a newspaper and William could tell was years old, and then sitting next to the man was her, his darling. Then as the door shuts behind the professor, the one reading the paper speaks up without looking at him.

“A counterweight supporting an opera house's chandelier fell through the roof and crashed into the audience, injuring several people and killing one. Imagine if it was the actual chandelier instead, what would have happened? What do you think, Professor Moriarty?”

“It would have resulted in a fire most likely, and due to the unique design of the chandelier more people would have gotten injured and certainly more than one would have died-“

“Hm, I thought so as well, good to know what I wrote in my book then was accurate.”

William glances at his darling who is just sitting there, not looking or speaking to him. The other man laughs at this and sets his paper down to look at the professor, a gleeful smile across his face.

“She almost refused to come, but we need to have closure on this whole affair so we can move on with our lives. A shame though, I quite enjoyed tracking her down with the others, it was like a competition to figure out what happened to her and who did it, and a bonus to beat the culprit at their own game, and it seems like I was the one to win, Professor William.”

William’s eyes drifted to where his darling sat in the box, her eyes still not going to meet the man who was publicly called her husband but who was in reality her worst nightmare.

“And if I may ask, how do you two know each other?”

“At an university funny enough, we were both invited to give lectures on our shared field of expertise, we became friends almost immediately and exchanged letter for a number of years when I lived in France, along with meeting up with a few of our colleagues to review our work-.”

“So you are an author as well, I do not think I have read any of your works.”

“Hm, that is a shame seeing as this meeting point revolved around my masterpiece, but I suppose you would like to cut to the chase.”

“Yes, as fun as this has been, I would rather her return-“

“Return with you? But that would mean you won, but you clearly did not, you lost. I invited you here so we can put this behind us.”

The man cut him off with a smile as if nothing was wrong, and it sent an almost thrilling shiver down William’s spine. He was about to reply to the man but then-

“Could you please leave William and I alone?”

She spoken up for the first time during this entire meeting, her eyes now snapping to glance at William for the briefest moments. The man gunned in response to her, standing up from his chair to leave the box, but as he passed William, he grabbed his shoulder-

“You may know how to murder people but rest assured so do I, after all both her and I write about it for a living. So try anything and I promise one of your friends will not be alive in the morning.”

The man’s cheerful tone had all but faded away and William hummed in acknowledgment to the threat right as he slipped out of the opera box, leaving William and his darling.

“Do not worry, he is bluffing, he does not have the heart to kill and nor do I.”

“Dearest…”

“I… I wanted to say goodbye, I figured it would be to cruel not to even after all the times you have done to me.”

“And how long do you think you can run?”

“Longer and faster than you can, and that became clear in my absence, you could not find me, so I think I will be fine. But I suppose if you find me again it is fair game, so… hm, what was that thing you told Mr. Holmes on the train with Louis and I that one time…”

She hums for a moment as she stands up from her seat, adjusting the gloves she wore as she prepared to leave. She stand before the Lord of Crime, looking him dead in the eye.

“Catch me if you can, Professor Moriarty.”

With that, she walked passed him, leaving the box and him alone as a smile came across his face…

“Oh you smart little thing…”

[jeysmullet]

may i request Jeff Hardy x daughter!reader? With the reader being the same age as Hook. Tax and Jeff Hardy trying to bring Y/N and Hook together because they know they like each other. please?

Dad.

Hook X Female Hardy!Reader

Warnings: None, just straight fluff.

y/n hardy.

“Dad, i promise if you bring up Tyler one more time.”

i sighed out, placing my phone face down onto the table.

“Alright, i’m sorry kid. i’m just saying, he’s a good kid.”

“i know that, but i promise you that i can make the decision on my own.”

i softly smiled towards him before checking the time on my phone.

i stood up from my seat grabbing my stuff, bidding my father goodbye realizing i had to get ready for my match.

i hurried down the hallway leading to my locker room. I almost made it to my locker room successfully before running into someone.

i looked infront of me to get a look at the person, and realized it was Taz.

“Hey Y/n, just the person i wanted to see.”

“Taz, if this is about me and Tyler again-“

i started before he cut me off.

“Listen, i know your probably tired of hearing it, but please just one date. i know Tyler’s tired of me saying it, and your probably tired of you dad bugging you about it. Just one date, please.”

“Fine. If that will get y’all to leave us alone then i will go on a date with Tyler.”

Taz smiled at me before giving me a nod and walking away.

I opened the door before stepping inside, and closing it and locking it.

i walked over to the couch where my gear laid, and picked up my gear.

i sighed before stripping down from my everyday clothes into my gear.

i already got my makeup done earlier, so i can really relax until my match.

or at least that's what i thought.

i heard 3 knocks at my door.

i rolled my eyes before getting up from the couch and walking towards the door.

When i opened the door it revealed my aunt, Reby Hardy, or as some may know her as, Gothic baby's mother.

i opened the door a little more to allow her more space for her to walk in.

i watched as she walked over to the couch sitting down while i was closing the door.

"Why is your dad and Taz look like their plotting something? Did something happen?"

The woman across from me questioned.

"I finally told Taz, i would go on a date with Tyler."

"Wait, so your dad and Taz don't know yet?"

"No, and i plan on keeping it that way. I want them to think their little plan worked."

"Your evil and I love it."

She laughed while shaking her head.

"Anyways, i'll leave you be. Good luck tonight!"

"Thank you, Rebs!"

i semi yelled as she walked out the door, closing it behind her.

Lord. I just hope and pray, my dad and Taz don't find out before we tell them.

TIME SKIP

Peter Senerchia.

Aka Taz

Jeff and I were watching how interested Tyler seemed to be in Y/n’s match.

"I'm glad they are finally going on a date. i was tired of watching them be love sick kids."

i heard Jeff say from his seat behind me.

i nodded my head in agreement.

We went back to watching Y/n’s match.

Y/n Hardy.

I had just made it to my locker room and began to wash up when i heard my phone ding.

i checked it, feeling my face turn into a smile when i say who texted me.

"So i was informed we have a date tonight?"

I laughed at his text as i started typing on my phone.

"yep, you wanna meet me at my hotel room?"

"11:00?"

"You know it."

"i'll see you then pretty."

I felt my cheeks heat up as i read his last text.

i began to hurry up with my shower, and got out.

I checked the time once i got out, and saw it was 10:24.

I hurried and packed my things into the suitcase i brought to the arena.

I made sure i grabbed my phone, and started making my way out the door.

When i finally reached the outside, i clicked onto the keys of my rental car to make the light's of the car light up to figure out which one was mine.

I walked over to the one that lit up, opened the trunk, placing my bag inside before closing it back.

I walked over to the drivers side of the car, opening the door hopping in.

I closed the door and locked the doors before putting the keys into the ignition.

I look at my phone checking the time before driving off.

Seeing the time made me glad the hotel was only like 7 minutes away.

For the short ride, i listened to music and just sung along with my playlist.

When i saw the hotel come into my view, i pulled into the parking lot and put the car in park.

I turned the car off, and grabbed my phone before hopping out.

I went to the trunk to get my suitcase, and then closed it back.

I walked towards the entrance of the hotel silently praying to myself tonight goes to plan.

TIME SKIP

Y/n Hardy.

I finished off the last detail of my outfit, which was just a simple black dress and some black heels.

i was also wearing a few pieces of jewelry to add a little sparkle to it.

I went to check my phone to see what time it was and saw it was 10:51

I just sat on the edge of the hotel room’s bed just scrolling on twitter waiting for Tyler.

I sat there for about 10 minutes before hearing a knock on the door.

I stood up from the bed fixing my dress before walking over to the door, and opening it.

As the door widened, i saw Tyler standing there dressed in black jeans, a black Graphic Tee, and Panda Dunks.

I looked towards his hands and saw a bouquet of flowers.

“For you, Pretty Girl.”

His voice broke the silence, pushing the flowers towards me.

“Thank you, Handsome.”

I blushed taking the flowers in my hand.

“You ready to go?”

I heard him ask as he put his out for me to take.

I nodded taking his hand in mine stepping from out the hotel room, as he closed the door behind me.

We walked towards the elevator surrounded by a comfortable silence.

As we stood waiting for the elevator, i felt a pair of eyes piercing into the side of my face. I look to my side and saw my dad and Taz standing there smiling.

“Oh lord.”

I laughed out, as i nudged Tyler so he would look over at them.

I saw Tyler turn his head, shaking it and laughing when he also saw them.

“We’re gonna leave y’all kids alone, we just want a picture before y’all two leave.”

The short man said, pulling his phone out.

Tyler shook his head before putting his arm around my waist pulling me closer to him.

I smiled putting my hand on his back.

I saw Taz lift up his phone taking a few pictures before dismissing us.

“Alright, we’ll let y’all kids go. Have fun.”

I heard the Southern man say.

I laughed as the elevator finally opened.

Tyler grabbed my hand, basically pulling us into the elevator.

He pressed the number 1, and just sighed as the door closed.

“How do you think their gonna feel when they find out?”

The man spoke.

“I’m gonna love to see their faces no matter what.”

i laughed just imagining their faces when they find out we’ve been dating this whole time.

@y/nhardybrand 17 seconds ago

I HOPE YOU LIKED THIS.

I’m sorry if it’s not what you wanted but i hope you still enjoyed🖤.

xoxo.

[purlpeiris]

Rose's Day of Asks - the sequel

Hope you are recovering well from what we all just had to endure. And in the spirit of happier things. What have been your favourite qls this year? (it's my first time in your inbox so excuse the more bland question, I promise I'll do better next time)

Rose💛

Ah thank you Rose. I’m happy to join in with this.

Fave QLs from this year so far…

I feel like I’ve loved many many series this year. Some I’ve been a bit disappointed by something in them but not enough to stop me liking them a lot.

If you’d asked me half way through ep 11 of Last Twilight it would have made it into my favourites list. But I hated the end of that episode and i disliked the overall end of the show so it got kicked off the list.

But getting to the actual list,

Time of Fever - I adored it. Even though it made me sob to the point I had to pause for a break because I couldn’t see the subtitles. And even though I didn’t get the post ULS scenes I desperately wanted, I loved it so much. The chemistry was great, I liked the pacing, I liked the scenery and the lighting and pretty much everything about it. I’ve said this approximately one million times by now but I just want a sequel set after ULS, a whole series or even a one off episode will do. I need them to get a concrete happy ending. But even without a sequel if I take it as a standalone series that ends back at the sea the ending was hopeful enough that I’d happily rewatch.

Love for Love’s Sake - I don’t think I found a single fault. I loved that it was different. I found the leads interesting, the story made me want to watch as soon as new eps were released, the ending made me smile so much. Overall just brilliant.

Blue Boys - I just really enjoyed the chemistry and the kisses and how it wasn’t too thinky and it didn’t make me sad. Sometimes I just need something short, light and easy to watch and Blue Boys was that.

At 25:00 in Akasaka - I’ve not done a full rewatch yet, because every time I log into Gaga to start I end up just watching the last episode. I’ve lost count now how many times I’ve seen it. I can’t quite put my finger on why I’m so drawn to it either. It just makes me happy.

Perfect Propose - I found it perfect, well almost. It would have been slightly improved by one more episode but I always think that when I love something and don’t want it to end, even when the story is completed. I liked both mains. I liked how Hiro changed his life and didn’t just accept that he’d be stuck in a miserable work/life balance situation that he hated for the rest of his life. I also loved the playful ending from the cramp to the tomatoes to Kai teasing about the texting. It left me happy.

Happy of the End - It was hard to watch and I didn’t “enjoy” it but it compelled me to keep watching in the hope that these broken men would find love together. I’m glad the ending was the way it was. I see the arguments that the series could have ended without them meeting again and I think that would have worked, but I don’t tend to enjoy completely non happy endings especially in QL stories because real life can be shit enough and I find a fictional life with a little hope is more satisfying.

Dead Friend Forever - I’ve just realised that I’m adding a series with a non happy ending to my favourites list despite what I just said about endings. I clearly can’t be trusted with my opinions! It’s still there though. Mainly because it was a break from the norm, I was intrigued the whole way through and I liked that everyone was at least a little bit messed up. I don’t even know what would have constituted a happy ending for any of them.

City of Stars - it was sweet, I liked everyone in it. It’s on my favourite list as an easy enjoyable watch with decent chemistry and a not annoying ending, which seemed to be rare this year.

I Became the Lead in a BL Drama - I’ve checked and MDL said it ended Jan 1st so technically it’s on the favourites of 2024 list. It was a very fun, silly, cute way to spend a few hours. I adored it so much that I got my partner to rewatch it with me about a month ago and I was really pleased she also liked it.

The On1y One - I’m adding this one because I loved it. I thought the actors were really good. It was slow, but I think airing two eps a week helped it not feel quite as slow because instead of lasting three months we’ve seen it all in six weeks. I might be disappointed and change my mind if we never get a series two, and I would have liked it to end on a happier note but as I just discussed with @ellsieee the ending could have been sadder and overall it’s not stopped me liking the series as a whole. I do feel like I’m going to have to read the novel because my patience is not strong enough for the wait.

This last one wasn’t out this year, and it’s not a series, but I’ve got no GLs on the list and as a queer woman I feel like this is letting myself down, so I’m cheating and adding this to my favourites list because I (re)watched it this year:

Summerland (2020) - A film about a reclusive queer unmarried writer who takes in an evacuee boy during the Second World War. It was so good. The ending was a little contrived and I saw it coming a little while before it happened but it was still feel good and happy and hopeful and comforting. I loved it.

Ok, that got long so I’m not thinking about any more series that I loved from this year.

[myobsessionsspace]

Hello!!!

It's great that you're open to Jikook questions 😊

There's something that's been hunting me since I first saw it.

What's your interpretation of Jimin's reaction during the Vminkook live in Dec 2021- I'm referring specifically to Jimin's reaction after V said he was going to release a song with Jungkook? His reaction was super interesting, and so was Jungkook's.

We now know that V was playing around, and his statement wasn't true. Nevertheless, I think it caught Jimin by surprise, and my take is that he was a tiny bit jealous 😅 bless Jungkook, I think he was in a little bit of trouble there 🫣

Youtube link here:

https://youtu.be/5ufxVvjNbL4?si=UCbXNJxUfkz0c7i6

The moment I'm talking about starts around minute 45:00.

Thanks 💜

Hi Lovely!

This is a great ask, it’s something I’ve had convos with my friends about before! I’ve always found it highly entertaining when any variation of vminkook are together and get into skit mode or when Tae & Jungkook tease Jimin just to get him to go into super cute mode!

It’s what they do and have been doing for years.

This live was so chaotic VMinKook style from the jump. If anyone hasn’t watched it please do **everyone please watch original content**

It was chaotic because it was initially Tae’s solo live but he said how nervous he felt doing it alone and asked for staff to get Jungkook to join him.

NB: all image are gifs unless stated otherwise, please watch as they are there to support statements made. Original links to lives are at the end 💜

Jimin then came as he heard Tae needed company and Jimin had been with Jungkook. Jungkook eventually joined later.

Due to nerves on Tae’s part and it being an unplanned live that Jimin & Jungkook didn’t intend to be having there were many times where they didn’t know what to do or the purpose of the live and would defer to Tae for direction. Tae had a running skit with Jimin about being the host of a show (the vlive) and Jimin and later Jungkook being his guests.

Not a gif. Still picture

They also had funny moments where Tae would name drop different brands (this was funny as the group had contractual obligations with brands and they know in their profession they can’t name drop brands without consequence).

TMIs, games and more skits.

credit: onlyluvkpop. Some of the fun and teasing they were having

As I said the live was fun, chaotic but also at times stilted due to its unplanned nature of it becoming a trio live and nerves.

There was a point where Tae whilst trying to engage Jungkook tried (in my opinion) to run a joke with JK on army? I’m thinking he was hoping Jungkook and Jimin would catch onto it with him?

But cutie Minie Jagi was losssstttt 😭

Jimin’s face in the live side by side with confused Jimin face from post Hobipalooza live

VMinkook love their role playing and teasing and even if Jimin hadn’t caught on, I do think nothing was done to intentionally exclude any of the three. All three tease each other in different combinations

So no, not jealousy in my opinion, Jimin has absolutely nothing to be jealous about. But confused and slightly lost, as to if it was another skit or really work related that he didn’t know about.

Maybe a tad annoyed with it being live and no hints that he was catching on to, to work with, giving a look to Jungkook like ‘are you guys serious? Why aren’t you giving me a hint on the joke’ or ‘why am I hearing about a song for the first time in a live? You guys aren’t making sense’ and Jungkook’s kinda like ‘I’m as lost as you are’ or ‘what did I do? I’m just going along too!’

Maybe he was probably also thinking to himself when did Jungkook have a chance in between eating chicken together, working out together, Jungkook coming to his room all the time?? 😂

Not a gif. Still picture

Also Tae literally talked about a Christmas song earlier on in the live when it was just Jimin and Tae

Normally though, when V & JK are teasing Jimin, he knows it, and loves it 😂

But Minie was lost that time and he told us so

Tae & JK sometimes find a lost Jiminie, to be a cute Jiminie

Original Source: Weverse

Ultimately (in my opinion) Tae was mixing some facts together, which had JK quicker to the draw in playing along, but JK too was also confused at the beginning of their skit. When Jungkook caught on, he too teased Tae a bit and tried to get an expensive gift promise from Tae

Reached my media limit so ss the transcript instead, but like always, please watch the original lives for yourself

I’m assuming that the two had been vibing together and having fun making little play songs and singing, which is why JK said “what is it?” And “How can we release that?”

Tae did have a Christmas song in the works, just not with JK.

But for anyone that wanted a Christmas song from Jungkook, that’s ok, don't worry, him and Jimin have already done one together!

Not a gif. Still picture from Dynamite Christmas remix MV

Original source: BANGTANTV

I really appreciate your ask @irmi3454, I had fun!

💜

Original Weverse Links for Live

Live Part 1

Live Part 2

Live Part 3

[doyoulikethisanimesong-poll]

Hello! A pretty random question, but I’m curious.

I saw you answered some asks about which songs you discovered & liked thanks to the polls, but have you discovered any anime that you decided to watch through the polls as well? I mean, did you ever look at a submission, did some basic checks, glanced at the synopsis and went “huh this looks interesting, might give it a watch” or the likes? Or do you focus on the music only and don’t check the synopsis at all (which would be understandable, with how many songs are coming in)?

Have a good timezone!

I don't really check the synopsis at all however there are a couple anime that I've got on a list because I thought the songs fucked so hard that I just had to try them out. Devilman no Uta finally got me to sit down and atleast try out Devilman Crybaby after ignoring it for years and I'm really enjoying what I've seen so far. I was a bit iffy on the style at first but after a couple episodes, I just couldn't help but adore it. I'm hoping to finish it up in the next week or two when I get some free time where I want to watch stuff.

The other big one is actually Gundam as a whole. I'd watched Mobile Suit Gundam 79 a couple years back and watched a few episodes of Zeta but I was really struggling with Kamielle so I put the series down in hopes that I'd come back to it later but after hearing a bunch of songs from the later series, I decided to bite the bullet and watch more Zeta. I'm about half way through now and also decided to binge all of Witch from Mercury in one sitting which I adored. I knew WfM was a banger of a series but its the first time in a long while that an anime has gripped me so hard. I think my only really complaint is the fact that someone in production obviously really wanted to try and make the relationship ambigious so they can claim "they were just friends" which is a tad frustrating.

Another fun one that I just remembered is Sonic. The Sonic X submission got me playing the Sonic games again. I had been doing a full playthrough of all the Sonic games in release order and at the time of that submission, I had gotten through the 90's 2D games but hadn't started Adventure 1 yet and was just a bit burnt out. But since that submission, I have gotten through all the "main" 3D games from the 90's and 00's (except the Riders series which I will be checking out at a later date). My most recent completion was Colors which I enjoyed the gameplay of but dear god was the story a complete shitshow. I remember enjoying it so much more as a kid. I'm now alternating between Lost World and Forces (haven't started Forces yet but I have a few hours today where I'm gonna sharescreen with my friend and see if I can finish it in one session).

[the-conversation-pod]

The ITSAY Anniversary Show, Part 1

AND WE'RE BACK!

October marks the third anniversary of the show that rewired the BL industry, and it felt like the right time for a retrospective. In part 1 Ben leads a panel talk on I Told Sunset About You. Just us along with @liyazaki, @waitmyturtles, @wen-kexing-apologist, and @so-much-yet-to-learn

Join us as we talk about our history with the genre, Phuket as a setting, the complexities of the characters, and why this show remains so important.

Listen on Apple Podcasts!

Timestamps

The timestamps will now correspond with chapters on Spotify for easier navigation.

0:00 - Intro 4:16 - How did you come to ITSAY? 11:31 - Phuket as a Setting 19:00 - Style and Genre 29:40 - Characters 36:18 - Teh and Oh's Dynamic 50:07 - Why do you care so much about ITSAY? 1:04:08 - Outro

The Conversation Transcripts!

Thanks to the continued efforts of @ginnymoonbeam as transcriber, and @lurkingshan as an editor and proofreader, we are able to bring you transcripts of the episodes.

We will endeavor to make the transcripts available when the episodes launch, and it is our goal to make them available for past episodes. When transcripts are available, we will attach them to the episode post (like this one) and put the transcript behind a Read More cut to cut down on scrolling.

Please send our volunteers your thanks!

0:00 - Intro

Ben

BWOOOOOOOOM. Okay. It Worked. You're already in it. 

Nini

[laughs] That's staying in.

Ben

Welcome back to The Conversation, everyone, for our fall season. We're very excited about this season. We decided to take advantage of the reduced output of shows, at least for part of summer, and decided to do a retrospective on I Told Sunset About You and I Promised You the Moon. We also have made a lot of friends in our time on Tumblr and decided to hang out with some of them, and talk about the show so it wouldn't just be me and Nini blabbing about one of our favorite projects.

Nini

Our panel of I Told Sunset About You experts includes the lovely, the only Turtles a.k.a @waitmyturtles on Tumblr. We have Aiden @so-much-yet-to-learn on Tumblr. We have Captain Hands who is @wen-kexing-apologist on Tumblr. And the fabulous friend of the pod, our good friend mor @liyazaki on Tumblr. 

So that is our esteemed panel for I Told Sunset About You in this episode. That's who you're gonna hear. In the next episode we're gonna talk I Promised You the Moon and have a different set of people on. 

So, Ben, aside from the fact that it's the anniversary of I Told Sunset About You—the third anniversary—why did you feel like this was the right time?

Ben

I think this has probably been one of the most thematically interesting years that the genre has had, and I've said many times that I don't think we'd be able to get the kinds of quality productions we're getting out of the genre now without the success of I Told Sunset About You and I Promised You the Moon, and I feel like for us to move forward with this particular show I think we had to at least get that show out of our system and into the recording. It had been bothering both of us that we hadn't really sat down and talked about it even though we dropped constantly that we are fans. I think it was really useful to talk about it. 

I really liked that we actually split up for it because you and I talked to each other a lot on this show, and it was really fun to talk to some other people about the show first and get some other perspectives.

Nini

We always say that one of the whole points of The Conversation is to expand the conversation outward, so we had a really good time doing these panels. We think you're gonna enjoy them. So, let's just dive right in.

4:16 - How did you come to ITSAY?

Ben

We're gonna get right into it, Our first question of the night. We're gonna start with Mor: longtime friend of the podcast. Mor?

Mor

Yes, hi Ben! 

Ben

How did you come to ITSAY?

Mor

[laughs] Well I came to ITSAY actually as a relatively new BL watcher — I had very begrudgingly watched 2gether and a handful of other very typical GMMTV type shows. And I had heard that there were some higher budget higher brow BLs out there, but I'm not ashamed to admit that what initially drew me to the genre in the first place is the… kind of fluffy romance trope-driven narratives? And it was just the first time that I had encountered any kind of queer media that was so lighthearted, and typically took place in a world where homophobia basically doesn't exist, and especially as a slightly older queer, that was such a nice change of pace compared to the other queer media that I'd been consuming up until that point. So frankly, the idea of watching a more serious BL back then made me a little nervous, even though that's a lot of what I typically watch when it comes to Western media. So I put off watching ITSAY for a while until I eventually decided to just jump into it and the rest is history. 

ITSAY isn't just my favorite show in the genre, it's one of my favorite shows and pieces of media period. I Promised You the Moon is too, but that's a hot take I'll expound on next time.

Ben

Thank you. Aiden, what about you, you've been around BL for a bit. How did you come to ITSAY?

Aiden

I've been in the BL slash QL sphere since the beginning, largely as a lurker. I didn't watch ITSAY when it aired, due to not being in the right headspace at the time to tackle a show with that much emotional impact. It was obviously very much in the zeitgeist, constantly in my feed, impossible to miss. So many other shows since then have been compared to it and I always planned to watch it someday in the nebulous future, but with so many things constantly airing I’d never quite gotten around to it. 

So when word went out that Ben and Nini were looking for people who hadn't watched it yet to get a mix of perspectives, I figured there probably weren't many others who'd been around as long as I had and somehow hadn't watched it yet. I re-evaluated whether or not I was ready to watch it and turns out I was! So, better late than never.

Ben

I am so glad we finally convinced you to watch the show. I wasn't gonna push you but I'm like ‘oh my god Aiden’s finally watching.’

Aiden

I'm glad as well. It was definitely an excellent thing to watch.

Ben

Okay, Captain Hands! [laughs] What about you?

Captain Hands

So I got into BL like a year-ish ago, and of course being a queer person who had not seen a lot of queer media the worms got in my brain instantly! There's like a master post of queer Asian shows that is somewhere on Tumblr that I saw, I don't know what user it is, sorry! But I saw a post that had I Told Sunset About You on it as like a good show to watch but I wasn't sure where to access it at the time, so I kind of just filed it away for later. Cut to like six months later, Ben and Turtles were yelling at me to eat vegetables, Kyr-kun-chan changed her icon to I think PP or Billkin or something, Nini mentioned PP and then a thousand messages in the clown server later ginnymoonbeam and I committed to watching ITSAY for the first time, which is probably a good thing because then Ben could warn me about doing one episode at a time.

Ben

Oh right, you were the one who was like, I'm tough I can watch more than one episode at a time. No.

Captain Hands

Wrong. Very wrong.

Ben

I'm glad you also finally joined us. Last but definitely not least, Turtles what about you? How did you come to ITSAY?

Turtles

Hey folks! Ben and Nini, thanks for having me, this is so awesome. All right, so, I guess what I'm the most well known on Tumblr for is the old GMMTV challenge project that I am blogging on. I came to BLs through Kinnporsche, at least Thai BLs through Kinnporsche, I was familiar with Japanese BLs for a couple years before that. I Told Sunset About You, in regards to it making it into the project — it was obviously going to be a natural part of the challenge syllabus, in terms of anybody picking up that syllabus and learning about Thai BLs in the first place. But the entire project, the watch list is community contributed, it’s 100% created by the community of Tumblr posters who love Thai BLs and who have lots of opinions about Thai BLs including this group here. It wasn't just through the solicitation of feedback on the OGMMTVC, uh, that I came to it, I certainly had seen I Told Sunset About You and I Promised You the Moon on many lists across Tumblr as, as an impactful BL. But in regards specifically to where it belonged by way of chronology, and by way of its cinematic impact, all of that feedback came through my soliciting the community on Tumblr for creating my syllabus that is teaching me about Thai BLs, and will hopefully get replicated in other people's journeys as well. So that's how I came to it.

Ben

I'm very excited by everybody's answers about how they came to this. I want to ask a quick follow-up question since — some of us have been here since the before time and the long long ago, and some of you got started like a year or two ago? Going in reverse order real quick: what is everybody's first BL that they remember? Turtles?

Turtles

The classic, the wonderful, the amazing, What Did You Eat Yesterday? Long story short, that was the first time I had ever discovered Tumblr as well — enjoyed that drama and I was absolutely insane for it for about two years solid.

Ben

Thank you for that. Captain Hands! What was your first BL?

Captain Hands

My friends were really obsessed with Word of Honor and showed it to me, so I got really into that, and that's how I found the, like, list of other BLs. If that does not count as a BL, then Kinnporsche was the first thing that I watched.

Ben

[laughs] Aiden, what about you? I'm actually really curious to hear your answer, because you and I have been around since the beginning.

Aiden

It depends on how you define BL, really. The first thing that I think could probably qualify would be the first Takumi-kun from Japan in 2007.

Ben

Unfortunately, that counts.

Aiden

Yeah [laughs]. Unfortunately indeed.

Ben

What about you, Mor? You said ITSAY was one of your first BLs. You have any others you watched before that? Or what was your other pathway into this?

Mor

2gether was one of the first ones, which is ironic because I hated 2gether. [laughs] I don't know why I finished watching it, I was just intrigued, so even though I kind of despised it for a lot of personal reasons — just wasn't for me — I enjoyed it enough that I wanted to keep watching. I wanted to find more.

Ben

I'm absolutely fascinated by how everybody came to this. It's KinnPorsche, 2gether, What Did You Eat Yesterday? and Aiden with some of the oldest stuff.

11:31 - Phuket as a Setting

Moving on to our next question! We're going to get into some setting stuff. What about Phuket as a setting stands out to you? I think I'm gonna have Mor answer this one first because they actually visited Phuket and some of the filming locations.

Mor

I certainly did, and I made a concentrated effort to take pictures, as some of you I think have seen, of the actual scenes in ITSAY, like the famous chip crawl deck, which was a journey to find. It was an incredible experience getting to visit Phuket. The setting of Phuket is unlike any other backdrop to a BL that I've ever seen. The landscape is really a character unto itself. I get a very similar but also sort of very rare sort of feeling when I watch ITSAY as I do when I'm watching, say, the train scene in Spirited Away. It's like looking at a natural environment that's been elevated to something almost magical just because of the way it's being shot or portrayed. 

I read once that Miyazaki's films almost make you homesick for a place you've never been, and that's how I felt about Phuket after watching ITSAY, to the point that it absolutely influenced my decision to go to Thailand and actually go there. And having been I can say it's just as lovely as they portray it to be — but I do know my attachment runs a lot deeper and is more personal than that, because Phuket to me will always be tied to Teh and Oh. 

The specific locations they chose, having now been there and walked around and seen it — it was so smart and it really enhanced the narrative while never overwhelming it or taking away from it. Like, I was very struck that the beach that the hammock scene takes place on… it's very wide, it's very open, and you would almost miss the hammock, because the way that the trees hang so low to the beach, it really sort of encapsulates the hammock? You have to actually climb under the branches. It really I think created this effect of Teh and Oh — they almost look cocooned in the darkness, in this otherwise very wide open environment. Maybe it felt a little safer because of that, to start saying what they had been feeling and skirting around. The wide shots of the beach chase scene… and obviously the beauty of Promthep Cape, and so many other moments. Phuket just… it did so much to enhance the intimacy of the scenes, and move this story along.

Ben

Apparently we're all going to have to go visit Phuket now. Turtles, when you were reacting to the series you were writing about some of the cultural crossover stuff. What do you have to say about Phuket as a setting?

Turtles

I've never been to Thailand, but I have spent a good portion of my entire childhood and adult life in Thailand's southern neighboring country of Malaysia — with my mother being Malaysian, my being part Malaysian — Phuket is an incredibly important locale for me to consider. Chinese migration from Fujian, from other locales in China, traveled in part down that Thai landscape to the Malaysian peninsula, and then ultimately settling all throughout Thailand, through Malaysia as I said, and ultimately into Singapore which has a majority Chinese population. 

A lot of what I learned about Phuket in part comes from my own Malaysian heritage, but also through conversations with other amazing Tumblr users including the very wonderful telomeke, who hails from the southeast Asian region himself. Phuket, Penang, Kuala Lumpur, these are towns that happened to receive more than their fair share of Chinese immigrants, that ended up in part creating a very unique culture that we call Peranakan culture: Chinese immigrants intermingling with ethnic residents of the areas in which they settled. Teh's mom is just a fabulous example of somebody that, that holds a lot of those influences all in one person: she wears Peranakan clothes, particularly when she's hosting events for the public at her Hokkien Mee stall.

Ben

Captain Hands, Aiden, do you want to say anything about Phuket?

Captain Hands

Phuket is a small town when compared to locations like Bangkok, which is where a lot of I Promised You the Moon is going to take place. I've been thinking that the small-town vibe works very well with how often it feels to me like Teh's entire world is ending whenever Oh, like, does something that like makes him jealous. Or like, if Teh's rejected or if he makes a mistake, like you can just feel in his body how much that impacts him, and it feels very small-town to me, to like to have these little moments be so big to him. 

There’s such a significant use of the Chinese language in this show, and for all the ways that like Chinese is used to tell us, like, what Teh is thinking and feeling, and for all the ways that like Teh is taking the time to try to teach Oh how to understand the language that Teh himself uses to express himself frequently — is a really poignant thing for me to pick up on considering Teh's own heritage, and like, his mother's heritage, and like the Chinese immigrant population that is a part of that community.

Ben

Turtles was talking about the cultural crossover that occurs in Phuket from all the various people migrating there. I'm from New Orleans which can jokingly be described as the northernmost Caribbean city, that has passed between French and Spanish control multiple times, and has now been occupied by Americans for one hundred and fifty years. So we have a very weird collection of cultures here as well — most evidenced in our architecture. And I think about that a lot when I reflect on Phuket — because I just rewatched it this week — it looks different from what we usually get in Bangkok.

Turtles

This show was so unbelievably layered by its visual cues, from a cultural interpretive perspective. Ben, as you pointed out to me, one of the friends, Phillip, he clearly comes from from a Islamic family, his parents are shown wearing a hijab and a songkok, and it's just very indicative of the the filmmakers giving us the indication that we're talking about… the mixing of cultures, assimilation and melting pot, all of the different words that we want to throw out there. 

As per your note about New Orleans, you know, as we say in Malaysia same same lah. It's very comparative to all of these indications that they were bringing up about Phuket. Thinking about Phuket as a tourist town as well, as compared to New Orleans, having just been to New Orleans myself, I think that there's just so much to, to pull out there by way of whether you make Phuket a permanent home or not. Teh and Oh clearly exist on the borderline of that permanence as they get closer to going to college.

Ben

There's something specific about growing up in a tourist town, like you can go visit tourist locations during peak tourist season as a way to avoid people you know. Because unless they're working the location, it's just strangers.

19:00 - Style and Genre

Ben

We're going to move to our next question here and get into some style questions. How does ITSAY play with genre and stylistic expectations? And specifically, are there any works that you recall while you were watching it? Aiden, you and I had talked a little bit about this.

Aiden

For myself when I was watching ITSAY, rather than paying attention to the source materials that ITSAY drew from, I found myself thinking back on shows that I'd seen since ITSAY aired and reevaluating them through the lens that had changed from my watching it. ITSAY clearly broke open a number of aspects that the Thai BL circuit specifically hadn't delved into until then, and expanded the genre as a result. 

My personal favorite impact is seeing shows set in rural locations, which were quite thin on the ground before that point, and have increased at least in visits if not fully set in more rural locations since then. Shows like Tale of a Thousand Stars, Cupid’s Last Wish, I Will Knock You, Remember Me, Moonlight Chicken. And it also, it showed grit and grime in a way that you really hadn't seen before that point in at least the BL genre. It was more common in media intended for queer audiences or art house type of content but the BL genre had always been very sanitized, very urban, very clean cut. Almost cartoonish and simplistic. And seeing something where you got to see buildings with marks on the walls that are from, you know, monsoon rain, stains, faded paint, chipped plaster, dirt on the ground, picture glass that had flecks on it, dust settled on things — that was a revelation, at least at the time. It really made things feel a lot more… settled and grounded and realistic. It felt like you could walk down the road and see these places, rather than it being a kind of constructed facade of where these shows are, that's an everyplace everywhere kind of generalization. And that followed with shows like Not Me, I Will Knock You again, Remember Me, that you got to see the grittiness, Not Me especially. 

The inclusion of religion, more Chinese cultural aspects, things like that that had largely been omitted from most shows until then, started becoming involved more in the day to day life that you got to see. Things like the talk Bart where you do the alms in the morning providing the food for the monks that go around traveling from home to home. 

We also started getting more slower paced shows like Nitiman, You're My Sky — which had heavy callbacks — Coffee Melody, My Only 12%. Shows with high concepts, stronger writing, better production value on a number of levels, like, ah, Bad Buddy, Triage, La Pluie, Kinnporsche. Also things with some of the more awkward side of queer life, which until then had very much not been present almost at all, outside of the more tragic kind of shows. Because again, it was that sanitized, sort of, ‘it has to be picture perfect, it has to be ideal’ kind of… nuance and vibe on the shows. And so we got things like Secret Crush on You, and I'll argue that I Will Knock You should fit there as well. 

The way that it's expanded the shows that have come after — and yes we do still have those sanitized, simplistic, clean, bubblegum sort of shows — very much enjoyable when you're in the mood for that sort of show, but we've also added things to give more breadth. Things like La Pluie, Step by Step, Moonlight Chicken, that make it a much more encompassing sort of genre, able to draw broader crowds that have differing interests as well. I am thrilled to see the change and be able to tie back now to how that was driven by ITSAY.

Ben

This is one of the reasons why I was really glad we finally got you to watch the show, because you've been in the genre as long or longer than me? And it was one of the shows that you had skipped for specific reasons when it first aired and I was curious how your long view of the genre would play into your reflections upon it. 

When I watched ITSAY, I ended up having a really intense reaction to the end of it — positively, as a result of some of the works that had come before. It's sometimes hard for me to connect ITSAY to other BLs that pre-date it, because those BLs are often heavily influenced by product placement and a slapstick version of humor that ITSAY is not relying on at all — it's an incredibly serious show about what it wants to cover. And that connected me back further to some of the German works I had watched growing up. Like Summer Storm, which is I think from 2004, there's a Dutch film called Boys from 2014, Big Eden from America in 2000 which uses its setting in the American hinterland really well. And I just had not seen this in Thai BL. 

The closest we came to something this grounded-feeling from Thailand was The Love of Siam, which they submitted to the Academy Awards in 2007. I actually had Turtles and Captain Hands watch that this week, so before I get into my very specific reactions to that, at the end of episode 5 of ITSAY, I kind of want to hear you two, and what you have to say about Love of Siam in relation to ITSAY before we move forward.

Captain Hands

You've said before that you felt like ITSAY is an apology for Love of Siam, and I fully agree. Two kids that are childhood friends separate for a number of years, come back together, the attraction between them is instantaneous and very obvious and kind of hard to ignore? And then having it end the way that it ends for Love of Siam, is, you know, it's a choice! I can understand and see why they would play it that way, but I agree with you, Ben, that it is, that this feels like an apology for what they did to us with Love of Siam.

Ben

Turtles, any commentary you want to give?

Turtles

Me not being Thai, not knowing Thai, having not visited Thailand — for a movie in 2007 to end with a successful same-sex relationship would have surprised me. So the film ending the way that it did was not surprising, and I found the journey to get to that point really poignant. That is a very deeply Turtles read, a very deep Asian read. Absolutely no surprise whatsoever that many BL filmmakers were influenced by this movie. And as far as ITSAY goes, is ITSAY an apology for Love of Siam? I can absolutely understand that verbiage, that's not a verbiage that I would necessarily jump to using. 

I could very well say that if ITSAY had ended without Teh and Oh getting together, I also would not have been surprised, especially with the way episodes 3 and 4 went. And now that I've seen Love of Siam I could feel stronger in that opinion. Now, as far as it making me feel good or satisfied with the story conclusion? That's, I think, you know that's, that's personal extrapolation there. But as far as the art itself goes I think Love of Siam communicated to me that I would not have been surprised if Teh and Oh didn't get together, if they had more personal, emotional, and also macrocultural wrangling that they needed to do. Love of Siam absolutely talks to ITSAY but I'm not sure that I would necessarily call it an apology.

Ben

Mor, do you have any commentary on genre history?

Mor

The really interesting, different thing that ITSAY did for me, as specifically a queer 30-something, a Westerner who's been in all sorts of extremely homophobic environments and, and different things throughout my life, and I've just gotten used to not having happily ever after. What I loved so much about BLs in the beginning was just, ‘oh man, we can have these light, bubbly, effervescent stories that get a happily ever after and it doesn't have to be complicated, it can just be sweet?’ And it was such a new concept for me, to see that. 

So, ITSAY ended up, like, with the ending that we got, it ended up being almost healing for me? As dramatic as that sounds. And that's really why, because it subverted it. You could tell going in, this is gonna be serious. This is gonna be hard-hitting. We're gonna be getting into deep stuff in terms of these queer kids figuring out who they are, and learning how they can be together, if they want to be together. So I was sort of expecting — because of my history and what I'm what I'm used to seeing — okay, well we're going serious, it's not a good chance this is gonna end well. So to see that — which frankly was a much more realistic portrayal of queer relationships than your typical sanitized BL — that is what took ITSAY for me to god-tier media, god-tier.

29:40 - Characters

Ben

Let's get into some of the character stuff. For all that they are incredible and great characters, why couldn't it be Bas or Tarn for Teh and Oh? Captain Hands! You're up first for this one.

Captain Hands

So the easy answer for me is that it just couldn't be? Like neither Teh or Oh really knows exactly when they developed feelings for each other, and they both try to have feelings for Tarn and Bas and they just can't make it work. Teh going to Tarn at 4 am and asking her to tell him that she loves him was, for me, like, ‘Oh I need to know what it feels like to hear this from her so I can know how it, how it feels… to hear it? And to know whether or not that feels good? If that feels something, like something I want to hear.’ 

For a more, you know, in-depth answer, because that's my whole shtick, right? There's a couple of things that I was thinking about, mostly the Chinese language element, the color element, and then just like Tarn and Bas as characters? One of the throughlines of ITSAY is that Teh frequently writes whatever his subconscious is fixating on over and over again in Chinese. Teh can't parse through the complexity of his emotions, but he can summarize them in like words, so like ‘rival’ or ‘intimate,’ and we know that there is much more behind what he's writing, than like what is actually being put down on paper? Because Oh's not good at Chinese, Teh spends so much of this show like painstakingly teaching Oh how to understand Chinese, and like how to understand him as a person and like his subconscious? So like once Oh starts to get it and get better at Chinese is when they really start to connect more intimately. If you think about the end of episode 3 with the sniffing scene, the buildup to that moment is Oh using the male/male protagonist question — like, how you say male protagonist in Chinese, how you say female protagonist in Chinese, is male-male okay? — is him asking if Teh is okay with them like potentially becoming a couple. 

And I know this is going to kill Ben to talk about the colors, but this is for the color girlies! Oh is red and Teh is blue and green, and something that I did notice on this watch through is like, Teh's home is filled with red, like the walls of the restaurant are red, his bedspread’s red, the couch, the clothing his mother wears is often red, and Oh's home is… very much blue and green, so like the sign for the Panwa resort is blue, the windows, all of the windows are framed in this kind of like, light green. These boys grew up in each other's colors. Their home is each other's colors. And so of course when they first meet, they're going to be drawn to one another because they remind each other of home. Tarn's color is purple, and so there are parts of Tarn that Teh is drawn to, but I see that as kind of being like the red parts of Tarn. 

Oh likes Bas because Bas kind of acts as a similar person in his life to Teh. In episode 2 Oh says that he likes Bas because Bas drives him around, but he won't confess because he doesn't know what Bas's feelings are for him, and he thinks that Bas likes girls and he doesn't want to lose him as a friend, when that is a direct parallel to Teh. And something that I started noticing on this watchthrough is that Bas picks up whatever color Teh is wearing, but he's often like a scene or an episode behind. So in episode 4 Teh’s wearing green at the beginning of like them going to the resort? And then Bas picks up the green when he shares a bed with Oh, and then by the time that Bas has picked up that green color, Teh and Oh are both in yellow, and so like they're now matching, and Bas is is behind the curve. 

From the perspective of just like, Tarn and Bas as characters, like they both value themselves enough to know when to let go, which I think is a very crucial part of their relationships with Teh and Oh? When Teh colors the hibiscus that Tarn draws red, she shuts that shit down like immediately and sends him home. And when Oh is quiet and sad on like the drive home, Bas knows immediately like why that is, and goes to Teh’s house. So like I really strongly believe that Oh ends up with Teh at the end because Bas gives him up? Oh would have kept fighting the urge to go to Teh, and like to comfort Teh and to support him, if Bas hadn't driven Oh to Teh's house and been like, ‘it's okay, it's fine, I understand.’ And, and given him that freedom.

Ben

I’m very fascinated to follow up on the thread about Tarn and Bas having more willingness to cut those boys off [laughs]. Anyone else have any commentary they want to talk about on Bas or Tarn? Oh please, Aiden, proceed.

Aiden

It just needs to be said that Bas is the best boy and Tarn is the best girl. Sorry, somebody had to say it.

Ben

Thank you, sir. So [laughs] I think Teh likes Tarn because she's as committed to her future as he is. She intentionally does not pursue a romance with him because she thinks it would get in the way of her pursuit of her art and architecture career. And Teh is super committed to his career as an actor. And I think that's probably why he liked her so much? This is a little bit of I Promised You the Moon slipping through. But like Captain Hands pointed out: because she's committed to what she wants for herself, she's not going to sacrifice a ton of her stuff for him the way Oh might, or that Teh might for Oh. 

And Bas… I've been thinking a lot about second lead stuff because of conversations with Shan. Bas doesn't confess until really late in the game? But so much has happened at that point, that Teh is going to be able to break past that because of the earlier promise. I agree that he is the best boy. But I think Oh likes the drama [laughs] that Teh brings to his life.

36:18 - Teh and Oh-aew’s Dynamic

Ben

On to our next question! The dynamic between Teh and Oh-aew is one of the primary draws of this story. What did you connect to in their dynamic or their story? Mor, you're up first.

Mor

I'm vibrating, can you tell? [laughs] So there is so much, I think, that could draw anyone into the story of ITSAY, because the glories and the pitfalls of first love, they have so much in common regardless of who you fall in love with. But I personally connected so deeply to their story, again, as a queer person, I know a lot of other people did as well. You can't help but painfully relate to both of them — at least that was my experience, especially my younger self — Teh having so many feelings that he spends so much time being incapable of processing or acknowledging, let alone communicating? And Oh being so long-suffering and hopeful and just pining with his whole self for this mess of a boy, who doesn't know what he wants or what he's doing. I mean not that Oh really does either; who knows what they want in a relationship when they're that young? And when you have feelings for your long-lost best friend that you just reunited with, it's very complicated. 

But there were just so many quintessentially queer experiences in ITSAY and in their dynamic that hit me right in my gay little heart. The tiny secret touches that mean so much, the affectionate friendly banter that all of a sudden is veering into flirting, or ‘are we flirting, like what's going on?’ and then the crippling doubt that sets in afterwards and how it can haunt you for days. This gut wrenching fear that these feelings you found yourself in can possibly affect your whole life: how your friends feel about you, whether or not your family accepts you. There's just so much that we have to consider, well beyond what our hetero peers typically have to deal with, and it's exciting and it's terrifying. It's not just incredibly validating, but like I mentioned earlier, it's healing in a way, to see such a frankly visceral experience portrayed with so much care and accuracy, as they did with giving us Teh and Oh's story, and their dynamic and how it progressed. I just feel like overall the stakes are so much higher for us? And often at so, so young and tender ages, to just explore who we are, to like and to fall in love with who we want to, and… their whole story for me, watching it unfold — this is very dramatic but it's true — for me, it felt like someone peering into my past looking at all these little hurts I forgot, these bigger ones that are still healing, and saying, ‘it was like this back then wasn't it? It was so hard. But there's so much beauty here, and you can have it too! It can be yours too. You can have this struggle, you can go through all of this, you can walk through the fire and emerge through the other side with this beautiful, beautiful thing, that maybe even is even more beautiful because of how much work and how much brokenness it took to get there.’

Ben

I'm so glad we got to let you get that out of your system, Mor. [laughs] Turtles or Aiden, do you have any commentary on Oh and Teh?

Aiden

For me the, the dynamic between Teh and Oh was very unique and… not something that I had necessarily dealt with, but the coming-out scene for Teh and Hoon resonated incredibly strongly for me. The dialogue from that scene matched almost word for word how I came out to my own brother? And the emotions, and the fear and the terror and the relief and the reassurance and the, you know, gentle teasing to lighten the mood… that felt so real. Mine had [laughs] rather less crying, at least in the moment, I definitely did later — but the text and the, the feeling of that scene just took me right back to that moment. And there's so much about this show that is authentic in a very specific way to different people's experiences.

Ben

Thank you Aiden. Turtles?

Turtles

For me, what Oh was able to get out of Teh, by way of what I called a drunken hormonal experience… just the way Billkin acted in his exploratory attraction towards Oh and how PP received it… how their physical interplay represented that budding romance, that budding attraction. The end of episode 2 on the boat particularly moved me, let alone the incredibly impactful endings of 3 and 4. I was surprised to sort of see Teh… melt, and go back and forth in his physicality at the end of that episode. Just the physicality of that exploration, and how the physicality itself then compared to and reflected on all the emotional processes that we saw between the two of them. I thought that that was so unique particularly about this show, and how unabashed it was to display such physical attraction developing between the two of them, particularly on Teh's end. That's something that I'll really take away from this show, that it displayed attraction, really really vibrating attraction, in such an impactful way.

Ben

Captain Hands, you have any commentary?

Captain Hands

Of course you know I do, I have commentary about everything all the time. So I think the thing that really drew me to Oh and Teh’s dynamic was the power of their feelings for one another, and like, especially the way that Oh acts as a magnet to Teh and like, the trance-like state that Oh kind of puts him in, so you get all these moments of Teh just kind of following after Oh, and like Oh being aware of that power that he holds? The sincerity of their characterizations and the commitment to their characters… I love this show so much for having Teh just constantly walk in circles. And how that will kind of translate into just the cyclical nature of his own personality, and like the experiences that he has, and the stuff that he puts himself through. The things he will continue to do as their relationship progresses. You can tell so much, like how comfortable these two are with each other, and how in love they have been with each other since they were kids, and that's another reason I think that they couldn't have really been with anybody else, is because they have all of this history between them? That is like so palpable, and like how much Teh wants to protect those memories, and like the feelings that he has when he's with Oh. The line that they say like, ‘don't give my time to others’ is so poignant. 

Seeing the way that Teh is continuously transformed by being around Oh, hating coconut at the beginning of the show and thinking that it smelled bad, and then like having that scene with Oh on the boat at the end of episode 2, and then immediately opening episode 3 with Teh just smashing a bit of coconut meat on his face as like hard as he can, because he just wants to be like as close to it as possible and like, how it doesn't smell bad anymore, and how it tastes good now because he's starting to have these feelings for Oh. And that has radically changed how he interacts with the world around him. It’s just like so good to me to watch being portrayed on screen, especially because Teh is not aware of his queerness in the way that that Oh is? And so like, Teh not knowing why he feels the way he feels, and then lashing out because he can't put a name to like, what it is that is causing the feelings that he has, it feels very, very in keeping with like, the queer experience as you are like, learning your own identity.

Ben

The thing with ITSAY — it's not just the things that it does that are familiar: with all the important touching, the knowing that exists between you, the dealing with the homophobia, the concern about how other people will perceive you, whether or not your parents can be proud of you if you are honest about this portion of yourself. What I think makes ITSAY so special as queer media, and why I lose my mind over it? It's about the fact that these two cannot hide how they feel from each other, at all. And as a result they are the most cry baby boys I have ever seen in all of queer cinema. I just rewatched it this week. These boys are crying constantly at and about each other. Every time any one of them says anything to the other, they make the other one cry over something. 

It's interesting because so much of the ‘are you are you not’ thing, when you're growing up, is about the uncertainty that the other boy is actually feeling it? And that never feels like it exists between them. Oh knew what he was feeling, but as soon as Teh starts to show interest in him, he picks up on it instantly, and eventually confronts Teh very directly about it. As Turtles pointed out, the way the intimacy between them is displayed so frankly. They spend all of episode 3 dancing around each other — we know where this is going! And then you get the back-scratching scene which leads into this arc about Teh dealing with the physical reality of Oh being a boy. Episode 4 has the underwater kiss. During the underwater kiss, Teh puts his hand on Oh's chest again, and Oh has a reaction to that, and you can see him immediately being hit with the uncertainty about Teh's attraction to girls — in the middle of the best kiss that has ever happened. And I don't think I noticed that in my earlier watches: even during this huge moment for them, they are still continuing the drama. There's a specificity to the way that these two feel queer, that I have noticed that every person who grew up with some of the Knowing, as I call it, feels so intensely about these two boys.

Mor

I'm nodding so hard over here I'm surprised I haven't lost my head at this point. Yes, yes, a thousand times yes to everything you said. The sheer magnetism of their connection, that's really one of my biggest takeaways from this show. Not only the authenticity, but just how much Billkin and PP's chemistry and their talent as actors, how they were able to really, ah, just make that experience that is so true, it's so true to my experience as a queer person who definitely had the Knowing from a very young age... and had a lot of of moments like that where it just felt like, ‘what, I think there's something here, you know it, I know it, I think we both know it’ — it's hard to put it into words, but they just captured it so beautifully, so brilliantly. It took me back. 

It was so accurate that it made me remember little moments, tiny little moments in my past that weren't so little in the moment, they were really big when I was, you know, ten, eleven, twelve, falling for a girl for the first time. That's part of what made it so special for me is how it really took me back to those times, and in a healing way.

Ben

Captain Hands.

Captain Hands

I was just thinking about, in the opposite sense of like, I did not at least acknowledge my queerness until I was in my early 20s? But like, definitely grew up feeling very different from people around me and like, lonely compared to people around me, for like reasons I could not explain at the time? And so like, seeing Teh have to go through and process his own queerness because it is not something that has occurred to him before, was something that I took so strongly to. I relate so hard right now in my life to the identity narratives, because it took me so long to kind of parse through what my identities are, and to like, get comfortable with them. And so seeing Teh’s kind of like, ‘can I even like boys?’ moments, that is something that was really fun for me to watch, again with like the circling, like he has no clue [laughs] what's going on in his life and he is just circling and circling and circling until he kind of comes to a point that he can connect to, and then he'll kind of run off in that direction.

50:07 - Why Do You Care So Much About ITSAY?

Ben

Final question for everyone: Why do you care so much about ITSAY? Aiden.

Aiden

I care about it because, for one it is authentic queer representation on a level that I had very rarely seen on screen — both in Thai media and and just in general. It's very true to life for a wide variety of queer people. But also I am passionate about it because of the way that it drove Thai media as a whole forward to a profound degree — but especially the QL genre. It showed unarguably that there was a market for high quality productions, and the industry reacted by broadening their offerings accordingly. Many of the Thai shows that I love most from the past couple of years clearly echo back to ITSAY in specific aspects, and there will be untold echoes that continue radiating forward from here, in a good way.

Ben

Thank you, Aiden. Captain Hands.

Captain Hands

ITSAY to me is a foundational queer show. Mostly because queer characters are allowed to be complex, three-dimensional and frustrating. If anybody from Tumblr is listening to this podcast, which I know you are, the for, by, and about queer thing is something that I've been looking at a lot as I've been watching more stuff, and this is very much all three, right? Because they're letting these characters make mistakes, and like hurt people that they care about in their quest to better understand themselves? They are allowed to be human, which is like a wild concept in a lot of the like earlier BL shows, it's part of why I don't like it personally when people say that ITSAY's not a BL, because like, why can't BL's be high quality with like, really good structure and story right? Like I don't think that it's fair to just be like, oh this doesn't count as a BL because of like the, the production itself. 

And I think that just the emotional, like honesty and vulnerability that the script and the actors like showed throughout this process, really struck deep in my experiences figuring out like my own identity? There's such a commitment to everything and everybody in the show that I really liked. Watching the documentaries. I just love how much of the emotionally safe space it felt like, seeing how often the director himself was crying watching these scenes? Or like, how they would kind of wind up these these crying scenes by like, I remember like, PP being rocked back and forth in a hug by the director in the position that he's going to be in when he hugs Bas crying at the end of, what is it, episode 4 or part of episode 5 when Bas is like, go comfort Teh? All of these moments that like really show that the cast and the crew support each other, and like trust in each other… there is so much time and effort put into this show, and that is part of why I like it so much, is like you can tell how much care every aspect of this show was given.

Ben

Thank you, Captain Hands. Turtles?

Turtles

ITSAY for me reaches an echelon that only a very few Thai BLs have done for me by way of really balancing out an homage, a love letter to the culture that, that it's celebrating, along with what Aiden and Captain Hands have said so far regarding queer representation, and just hit a really incredible artistic balance experimented with with cinematic form and this serialized kind of publication way. Captain Hands, to your point about the argument about if it's a BL or if it's not a BL, one thing that I've been considering quite a bit in conversations, particularly with neuroticbookworm, has been whether or not ITSAY would have been more successful as a movie. And I've thought more about it and I think that, while there may be an answer to that that's separate from what I will say here — which is that I think it was really groundbreaking that they took this incredible idea and artistic vision and put it in serialized form, and experimented with what had been concretely developed as a serialized BL genre, and played in that sandbox. 

So taking all of that together, taking all of those maybe slightly even risky decisions rooting this show in a particular voice of a culture that we hadn't seen highlighted quite in as explosive of a way as ITSAY being rooted in Phuket was, along with its gorgeous depiction of queer revelation, of queer realization. Just all of that combined into one pot of a show really blows me away. 

My watching experience of it — it took me out, I couldn't multitask, I had to take all of your guys' advice and watch one episode at a time, and no show has done that for me. And so that, that's what I'll take away from it. A unique experience, unlike anything else that I ever experienced watching a Thai BL.

Ben

Before I move to Mor, I just have to say: Absolutely not! This should not have been a movie! I have watched a lot of goddamn movies. We deserved all of the time [laughs] that ITSAY gave us on this story. It would have felt so rushed if they tried to force this shit into two goddamn hours! Yeah! No! No. [Ben bangs the table] There's the table slamming. [laughs]

Turtles

Bartender, get him another drink!

Ben

I have drank like three-quarters of a bottle of wine, so, I'm sorry.

Turtles

Get him some pasta. [laughs]

Ben

[laughs] All right, sorry. This is about you all, not about me. Bestie in Christ, Mor!

Mor

[laughs] That was fantastic, thank you. I was bangin’ my desk over here like yessss, preach, take me to church! I am here to receive.

Ben

Why do you care so much about ITSAY?

Mor

Ohhh boy. A core memory for me from the last couple of years is sitting shell-shocked, absolutely shell-shocked on my couch, silently weeping, watching the credits of ITSAY roll for the first time. Truly just unable to move for probably ten, fifteen minutes, just trying to absorb everything that I just witnessed? And all I could think was, ‘things are different now.’ Truly, that was my reaction to it, I mean, this show? It wasn't made to fulfill a trope. It wasn't made to fill a time slot. It was made to show the tender beautiful humanity that is at the core of all love stories, regardless of the gender of the person you fall in love with, and that's just not something that I can say for a lot of other BLs, or shows period? Not that they don't stand on their own two feet for all sorts of other reasons, but it's something that set ITSAY forever apart for me. Not only that that was clearly their goal, but in how beautifully they achieved it, how perfectly in my opinion they achieved it. 

It was so realistic to my experience as a queer person, but it's also a show that I would feel very comfortable showing to someone who had no experience with the BL genre. Because you don't have to have any. You don't have to have an appreciation for it. You just have to be a person. You just have to be a human who has lived through tough human things, and had relationships, to find so much value, so much to relate to. I don't know how you can watch ITSAY and not have it just reverberate with you on some personal level. Whenever I discuss it with people, just like we've been doing tonight, I'm hearing things that even being — practically a priestess of ITSAY I feel like at this point — even with that I'm hearing things that I hadn't thought of before. And I think that's beautiful, that a show can be so elevated, and done so well that people from all walks of life can come to it, and come away with things that are just so true and accurate to their experience, and you learn things by hearing it, you know, hearing from them. But yeah it was so realistic to my experience as a queer person, while also giving a happily ever after, which was beautiful but it was also very hard won, which made it even more beautiful for me. The characters are real, they are flawed, but they figure it out… gives hope for the rest of us. [laughs] It raised production values. It raised the bar on what a BL can be. 

We did touch on a little bit about people debating whether or not ITSAY is a BL and I just have to say, whenever I'm debating anything I go to the source. And it was I believe a Teen Vogue article that BKPP were interviewed for: they both referred to the show as a BL, so have the writers, so has the crew, and if they are comfortable with addressing it as that, so am I. 

And then on a more personal note, it introduced me to BKPP my beloveds, to some of my best online friends, it got me halfway around the world to Thailand. Overall, it's an artistic and technical triumph as much it is is queer storytelling at its finest, it did everything it needed to in all the ways that it mattered, it moved me, it continues to, in a way that not much media ever has. It's got my whole heart and I could probably find something new to marvel about, you know, forever. It's as complicated and as, as simple as that for me

Ben

Thank you, Mor. I have been watching queer cinema for a very long time. Part of why ITSAY is so important to me, is no other piece of media has so consistently generated such strong visceral reactions. There's so many great pieces that you can pull out for people that many of them haven't seen, but there's something about ITSAY, where if you are aware of it at all, if you even heard its name, you know something about it, and have an opinion about it, whether you've watched it or not. And I also feel so strongly about watching Thai queer people talk so frankly about how they also had the same sort of visceral experiences that the rest of us had. 

What also matters for me about this show is, like we've had some interesting moments in the west: like Moonlight, Call Me By Your Name, other queer movies that have released, and we keep waiting for their impact to hit the rest of us. We felt the impact of ITSAY within a year of it releasing? ITSAY immediately impacted Korea's willingness to participate in BL, despite how conservative their film industry is. Japan re-upped their efforts on the genre… and GMMTV responding to that! We felt it all throughout late ‘21 early ‘22. It is so rare that you can point to a work that genuinely changed the way an entire genre functioned? And also really rare that you can feel that impact in its time. 

And with that: thank you all for joining us on this first clown panel of The Conversation! If there's anything you want to say to the people before we go?

Turtles

I just want to say what an honor it was to be invited on this. I love loving BLs and I love loving BLs along with you all.

Ben

Captain Hands.

Captain Hands

Sorry if we weren't as funny as David.

Ben

[laughs] That's impossible. He's an unhinged 45-year-old gay man. Aiden?

Aiden

One last thought that came up: ITSAY has this level of radical compassion for every single character on the screen, and that helps the viewer to have compassion even if they may be homophobic or unfamiliar, it brings a level of love and care to those characters, in a way that we really don't get, and I have high hopes that it's something that's going to be repeated again as we move forward.

Ben

Mor, any other closing thoughts?

Mor

Oh man, I don't know, I'm just all caught up in the ITSAY wave of feels, as I, as I tend to do. This show has a unique way of shutting down my logical brain and just making me feel all the things, which is what good art should do, dammit, it really should. So, it's doing its job. 

Go watch ITSAY! If y'all are listening to this and you haven't, what are you doing? Come on.

Ben

It's been three years, if you haven't watched it since 2020, go watch it again. It holds up. It's still good.

1:04:08 - Outro

Ben

And we're back. Fun fact for all of you: Nini's setup went completely to shit while we were recording, so she had no idea what the hell we were talking about. For the entire recording we're having to text her updates so she doesn't close down the recording booth. So, Nini is now reacting from post, not from the panel. 

Nini

[laughs] Yeah, it was a very interesting experience editing the panel not having heard a word that you guys said, so it was all brand new to me. That is a very new experience for me. 

Ben

She edited out all of the “Nini can't stop me because she's not here.” [both laugh]

Nini

Oh god, no, but it was really delightful. I had a really good time. I had a really hard time editing the panel, but there's some things that you guys brought up that really sort of tickled my brain, and I wanted to get into them while I was talking to you in the afters. 

Captain Hands made some comments on why Teh teaching Oh Chinese, with Chinese being Teh’s comfort language of expression, why that matters, and how the translation scene on the side of Promthep Cape plays into that. I found that was really interesting because that is new thinking for me, after three years and countless rewatches of this show I didn't think that there could be something about it that I hadn't thought about, or that was new to me, but thinking about Chinese as Teh’s comfort language—as his main language of expression. That brought up a whole new set of things to me in their relationship.

Ben

I have a couple of friends locally whose parents have immigrated from Taiwan, and they talk about how they have probably like a kindergartener's understanding of the language sometimes, and I hadn't thought about how Teh wasn't learning Chinese for the first time—that he may have had some familiarity from growing up around his mom. That was a fresh thought that I had coming out of the panel.

Nini

It just adds a little bit more color to what exactly Teh was doing in that class, what he was doing tutoring Oh-aew. How hard he worked to make sure that Oh-aew could understand him, because Teh is not great at expression, but the few times that he manages to express himself very clearly to Oh-aew it is in Chinese. Using the Chinese flashcards on the boat, writing and rewriting words in Chinese in his notebook. That's how he's able to get his points across to Oh-aew, and he can only do that because he's taught Oh-aew how to understand him. I found that was a really good observation. 

You made an observation as well that I really enjoyed about tourist places as safe spaces when you are from a tourist place, that going to do tourist things actually gives you a certain amount of anonymity that you wouldn't normally get. 

Ben

Some of the normal spaces like cafes, malls, etc. are populated by people that you would run into, but, like, locals are not going on a swamp tour. And so, you can get away with things that you might not elsewhere. Like, I think about the fact that Promthep Cape is a really popular tourist location, and the fact that when they were actually filming that scene very kind tourists stayed out of the camera, but were like two meters sometimes away from the boys while they're recording one of the most pivotal scenes of the series. And that's kind of what it's like when you're in tourist places in your hometown. Like there's a bunch of strangers crowding around you, and it doesn't matter if they hear you say something because they don't know any of your people.

Nini

One thing that Aiden brought forward that I really wanted to delve into myself: Aiden talked about visual style and how ITSAY allowed things to look grungy, and things to look worn, and things to look old, and things to look a little bit dirty; and how that contrasted against the previous BL impulse for everything to be bright and clean and shiny. And one of the things that made me think about from my own experience, how upset—I don't know if ‘upset’ is the term—people tend to get from my home country when my home country is portrayed outside as anything other than bright and shiny and clean and modern. There's that whole pressure to look a certain way to the outside world, and that comes through in our media as well. 

So watching that impulse sort of come through in Thai media, and then being sort of broken by this particular production. I always like when I'm watching media from other places when I can see the points of connection between my culture and another culture, between my home and another person's home, that always makes me feel more grounded in the story, even though it's a culture and a place that might be 180 degrees away from me. You can still find those very human points of connection. I really enjoyed that. 

Here's one that I want to ask you. You talked towards the end of the panel about Oh and The Knowing, and you've brought up The Knowing over and over again recently, and it's something that I've really been sitting with as you've explained certain things in your life and certain things in queer life, and one of the things that struck me listening to the panel that I think hadn't struck me before is that Oh Knows. Oh has The Knowing, but Teh also knows about Oh because Teh has a complete lack of surprise when Oh tells him that he likes Bas. He doesn't even register it as, like, a surprising thing. So Teh also has a Knowing about Oh but not about himself. I found that a really interesting juxtaposition.

Ben

Teh is an actor who's masking all the time. I think he was probably a little bit surprised, but when Oh tells him that secret, Teh's only goal is to desperately reconnect with Oh. So, I don't think in that moment he cares about Oh being queer. Like, Teh’s so stupid. He's not like paying attention to that sort of stuff. He only cares about Oh not shoving him away at that moment. Like, it didn't really matter what that secret was because he was going to respond positively.

Nini

I get that, but as the time goes on, we don't see any reaction from Teh about it, which is not the reaction that I would expect a teenage boy to have.

Ben

[sighs] When it comes to Teh, he's always performing. It's possible that he already knew these things, but I get the sense that he compartmentalizes. Like, a big part of it for Teh was he doesn't want to talk about it. Because talking about it makes it real, and then he has to face the reality of it. Like, that's what happens after the underwater kiss scene is Oh wants to talk about it and Teh really, really doesn't want to talk about it. It's possible that he knew, but because he's been away from Oh and so repressed, it's not eating at him.

Nini

I'll sit with that.

Ben

Teh doesn't act like he knew, but it's very clear that Oh was important to him, and he had to rapidly come to terms with those feelings.

Nini

I think it's pretty clear that Teh didn't know about himself. It's pretty clear that his journey I Told Sunset About You is a journey of understanding things that he didn't know and understand about himself.

Ben

Part of why I like that so much of Teh's journey is unspoken is it allows it to be more universal because it lets the audience at large take from Teh what they need and project into him what they're bringing to the scene, and this works out really well for Oh a lot, too, because Oh does so much with just looking at Teh.

There's some really great dialogue in the translations of this show, but there's a phenomenal amount of amazing work done from what isn't said, and that is one of my favorite things about it.

Nini

I also agree that one of the great things about ITSAY is how much is done in the silences and it's so interesting that you talked about the silences being something that the audience can project whatever they want onto and that being part of ITSAY’s success, because it's also in a way so legible. 

Normally when there's space like that for the audience to project onto we get all kinds of wild shit, like I’m just gonna be real with you. But the silences and the way that these two boys acted were so legible that even though there was all this silence between them, for all this space for the audience to project into, they generally projected what I think the creators intended because the reads were largely consistent in terms of how people were taking it in and how they were reading things.

Ben

I do think so, but a big part of that is how simple ITSAY’s story is. It's a very straightforward coming of age story in a lot of ways. That's why it works! Everything about ITSAY is inherently familiar, and it feels like an experience that people can enjoy again a decade, two, three decades from now. It's one of those classics you can go back and look at and you can probably point at where other projects referred back to it. 

I feel like I Told Sunset About You is going to be one of those projects where the future of queer coming-of-age cinema is going to refer back to it as one of its seminal moments.

Nini

So all that said, if we had to write at this point… an ode to ITSAY as our closing remarks on this retrospective, what would be your ode?

Ben

ITSAY is the best show that has ever existed because it is called I Told Sunset About You. It sets up this huge drama about running to the cape together before sunset, and they make it to the cape at sunset. Oh has this incredible breakdown and just says “I don't care what we're going to be to each other, just please don't leave me again,” and Teh, upending decades of genre history and expectation, says, “If I can be anything, can I be your boyfriend?” and old wounds finally closed in my heart.

Nini

Well, that is an ode. I don't think I could be anywhere as poetic as you about it, but what I will say is that this story touched something very deep inside me. I can't imagine not having seen this. I can't imagine where I would be now if I hadn't seen this. It changed things for me in a lot of ways, and that's one of my highest praises for media. If you change things for me, if you make me look at things differently, you've won. So, that's my ode to ITSAY: you won.

And with that we're gonna wrap this one up. Our next episode will be our Last Twilight in Phuket discussion. Ben and I are going to sit down and jaw about that a little bit, and then we will be introducing a fresh new panel and talking about I Promised You the Moon.

So look out for that. We out. Say bye to the people, Ben.

Ben

Peace.

[commodorez]

Hi! I'm so sorry if this has been asked before, but I'm completely clueless on computers, but I want to learn about them. Any places you'd recommend starting for bare bones beginners? I'm also interested in early-mid 90's tech particularly too. I'm guessing I have to figure out the basics before I can move onto specific tech though, right?

You're really knowledgeable and nice so I figured I'd just ask. Any help at all would be appreciated. Thank you! :]

That's an excellent question, I don't think I've been asked it before in such a general sense. I was raised with the benefit of being immersed in computers regularly, so providing a solid answer may be a bit difficult since for the basics, I never had to think about it.

I had computer classes of various types throughout my school years. We learned how to use a mouse, typing, word processing, programming -- and that was all before middle school. We got proper typing, html, and general purpose computer science courses in middle and high school, and you can bet I took those too. I also have the benefit of a bachelors of science in computer science, so you'll forgive me if my answer sounds incredibly skewed with 30+ years of bias.

The biggest suggestion I can give you is simply to find a device and play with it. Whatever you can get your hands on, even if its not that old, as long as it's considered past its prime, and nobody will get upset of you accidentally break something (physically or in software). Learning about things with computers in general tends to have some degree of trial and error, be it programming, administrating, or whatever -- try, learn, and start over if things don't work out as expected the first time. Professionals do it all the time (I know I do, and nobody's fired me for it yet).

Some cast-off 90s or early 00's surplus office desktop computer running Windows would be a good start, just explore it and its settings. Start digging into folders, see what's installed, see what works and more importantly what doesn't work right. Try to find comparable software, and install it. Even the basics like old copies of Microsoft Office, or whatever.

I recommend looking through the available software on winworld as it's an excellent treasure trove of operating systems, applications, games, and other useful software of the time period. I'd link it directly, but tumblr hates links to external sites and will bury this post if I do. If you're a mac fan, and you can find an old G3 or Performa, there is the Macintosh Garden's repository of software, but I'm not the right person to ask about that.

Some of you might be like "oh, oh! Raspberry Pi! say Raspberry Pi!" but I can't really recommend those as a starting point, even if they are cheap for an older model. Those require a bit of setup, and even the most common linux can be obtuse as hell for newcomers if you don't have someone to guide you.

If you don't have real hardware to muck about with, emulation is also your friend. DOSBox was my weapon of choice for a long time, but I think other things like 86Box have supplanted it. I have the luxury of the real hardware in most cases, so I haven't emulated much in the past decade. Tech Tangents on youtube has a new video explaining the subject well, I highly recommend it. There are plenty of other methods too, but most are far more sophisticated to get started with, if you ask me.

For getting a glimpse into the world of the 90s tech, if you haven't already discovered LGR on youtube, I've been watching his content for well over a decade now. He covers both the common and esoteric, both hardware and software, and is pretty honest about the whole thing, rather than caricaturish in his presentation style. It might be a good jumping off point to find proverbial rabbits to chase.

I guess the trick is to a find a specific thing you're really interested in, and then start following that thread, researching on wikipedia and finding old enthusiast websites to read through. I'm sure there are a few good books on more general history of 90s computing and the coming internet, but I'm not an avid reader of the genre. Flipping through tech magazines of the era (PC Magazine comes to mind, check archive dot org for that) can provide a good historical perspective. Watching old episodes of the Computer Chronicles (youtube or archive dot org) can provide this too, but it also had demonstrations and explanations of the emerging technologies as they happened.

There are so many approaches here, I'm sure I've missed some good suggestions though. I also realized I waffle a bit between the modern and vintage, but I find many computing troubleshooting skillsets transcend eras. What works now can apply to 10, 20, 30, or sometimes even 40+ years ago, because it's all about mindset of "this computer/program is dumb, and only follows the instructions its given" . Sometimes those instructions are poorly thought out on the part of the folks who designed them. And those failures are not necessarily your fault, so you gotta push through until you figure out how to do the thing you're trying to do. Reading the documentation you can find will only take you so far, sometimes things are just dumb, and experimentation (and failures) will teach you so much more about the hard and fast rules of computers than anything else. I'm rambling at this point...

So, let's throw the question to the crowd, and ask a few other folks in the Retrotech Crew.

@ms-dos5 @virescent-phosphor @teckheck @jhavard @techav @regretsretrotech @airconditionedcomputingnightmare @aperture-in-the-multiverse -- anything big I missed?

[kimmiessimmies]

📩 Simblr question of the day: Do you have a process for making your simblr posts?

answer in whatever way is most comfortable for you and feel free to share this SQOTD around, make sure to use the hashtag SQOTD and tag me in separate posts ~ 💛

This question was contributed by an anon in @simblr-question-of-the-day !

Thank you SQOTD Anon or forwarding Anon for this question!

I have an extensive process for my story posts.

Timeline. The whole story is set out in a timeline. This is an Excel document outlining what is happening when. The timeline is very much a living document in the sense that I change it constantly. Things happen as I go that spark new ideas, and then new chapters are added to the timeline. But there's an outline, I know where I'm going. 😊

Writing. My story (and the timeline) is divided into chapters. First, I write a chapter. Very much like a book. I write all the dialogues, all the narrative and I make notes about things I want to add in image later.

Pose selection / scripting. I take my written chapter and go through it scene by scene pre-selecting poses from my database (a folder system) I think will fit what I want to tell/show in this scene.

Setting up. Downloading things I need for a scene, setting up the location, dressing Sims, getting everyone where they need to be.

Shooting. I shoot my chapter scene by scene. Pose, shoot, pose, shoot. It takes a while...

Adapting. While I shoot, I adapt my chapter. I change things depending on the shot I could get. Sometimes something unexpected happens in a shoot which prompts me to rewrite a large chunk of my chapter. I don't mind that, I like when the unexpected influences the story.

Select and edit. I go through my pictures and select and edit the ones I plan to use. Most edits are minor, just adapt light and frame the shot. But sometimes I need to do some drawing to make up for clipping. Most of my shots never make it into the story. 😄

Combine text and image. I go to WordPress first and put the chapter together; image, text, image, text, etc. I don't publish yet.

Simblr. Finally, it's Simblr time. I cut up the WordPress post, deciding which points are good places to do this, add tags etc and queue it all.

Coming Up. I put up my "Coming Up on A Taste of Honey" post a day before my chapter starts running.

And we're off! When I have a running chapter, my first story post of the day always goes live at 13:00 / 1pm (GMT +1) and then every half hour. Usually three posts a day, sometimes two, sometimes four. Depending on the flow.

For all non-story posts I don't really have a system. I try to plan replies to asks, taggames and random character posts in the same time-rhythm as the story posts, but sometimes it's more random.

Thanks for asking! Sorry for the essay, I hope it was at least somewhat interesting. I'm curious to see other answers to this question. 😊