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shoutaaizawas · 4 years ago

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hii :) can i request shoto with either a college au or fake dating au with the prompt “kiss me again” FLUFF FLUFF FLUFF (nfsw if it flows and ONLY if you want) please

thank you for the request! i always forget how much i like writing todoroki. im sorry but i don’t do nsfw but please take my offering of a kissing scene haha

↳ todoroki shoto x reader → ❝all-nighter❞

event: au!prompts summary: you never expected to become friends with shoto todoroki but when you need to share a book for a project due in the morning you end up bonding. word count: 1,939 tags/warnings: fluff, incident with a creepy guy at a party, comfort, first kiss a/n: i don’t know what college is like bear with me. thanks to @lilli-chae for the college insight. also im giving myself a reward for writing and posting before ten at night lol

Todoroki Shoto was the last person you ever expected to befriend. He was a rich boy from a rich family and those were people you usually tried to steer clear of. He was always silent, if someone asked you what he sounded like you wouldn’t be able to answer them. And he always stared, it wasn’t in a creepy way like some guys but it still unsettled you. You had a few classes with him but had only heard a few words from him.

The first time you ran into him he was lost on campus. It was oddly endearing, the sight of him standing there looking around confused. You asked him where he was going and it happened to be the same class as you. He hadn’t said much except for a ‘thank you’ once you reached the class.

It wasn’t until one night at the library that you started to see him differently. You had a project due the next day. Had you received it weeks ago? Yes, but in your defense, you had a lot of other projects. Okay, maybe you had procrastinated too much. It was late and you needed a specific textbook for the assignment. With your ice coffee in hand, you made your way to the library ready to pull an all-nighter.

As you reached for the book you were already so exhausted you hadn’t realized that someone else was reaching for it at the same time.

“Oh, I’m sorry.” You said looking up only to see Todoroki.

“Sorry.” He said, looking sheepish.

“I’ll grab another copy-” As you looked at the shelf you realized there was only one. “Oh.”

“My project is due tomorrow, otherwise I would offer to use it after you.” He said.

“Mine too.” You said. “We could share it if you don’t mind.”

“That seems like the best option.” He agreed.

The two of you set up at a table big enough for both of you to spread out. It turns out you had the same topic for the same class.

“So do you procrastinate a lot too?” You said trying to break the ice with some humor.

“Not normally.” He said but didn’t elaborate.

“I wish I could say the same but this happens to me more than I’d like to admit.” You said. “You can use it first, I have to get it started before I need the information.”

Shoto nodded and took the book before getting to work.

It was surprising how likable Shoto was once he opened up. He was a bit stiff and awkward but he was really funny and very considerate. You felt bad judging him on his family status. He was nothing like the rich brats you had encountered in the past.

The two of you would take breaks, you would offer him snacks, and most likely due to the sleep exhaustion, you shared a lot of personal stories. His family was something else. The more you got to know him all the pieces of who he was fit together.

The last thing you expected was to wake up with your head on his shoulder in the library the next morning.

“Shoto.” You said nudging him awake. You looked at your phone, you had less than ten minutes to get to class for your presentations. “Wake up we have to hurry.” You said.

Shoto’s different colored eyes opened and looked at you in confusion before he realizes where he was.

The two of you quickly scrambled to pick up all of your stuff and run to class. Thankfully everything had been pretty much done before you fell asleep but you were upset you wouldn’t be able to grab a coffee to wake you up before class.

Since that night you considered Shoto a friend. You would study together sometimes and grab a coffee or lunch between classes. You found yourself confiding in him and he did the same with you.

“When did you and our school’s prettiest boy become best friends?” Your friend Mina asked.

“I think best friend is a bit strong, we just barely started hanging out.” You said.

“Well, best friend was me going easy on the teasing. The real question is when did you capture his icy heart?” Mina teased.

“Wow, okay. There has been no capturing of icy hearts.” You defended as your face heated up. Sure, Shoto was handsome and you liked his personality a lot but that didn’t mean you had a crush on him and you knew there was no way he would have a crush on you.

“Have you seen the way he looks at you?” She questioned.

“Yeah, he looks at me like he does everyone else.” You said.

“If that’s what you want to tell yourself,” Mina said throwing her hands up.

“It is what I’ll be telling myself.”

You did your best to push Mina’s words away but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t try to sneak glances at the way Shoto looked at you. Was his gaze softer when he looked at you? It had to just be your mind making it up.

It was a Friday night and that meant parties. Normally you were more of a stay at home and play video games and eat snacks kind of person but your friends wanted to go out and it had been a while so you agreed.

You ended up at a party on campus, it felt like almost everyone from school was there. You found yourself looking for one person in particular but you couldn’t spot him. Your heart sank a little bit, one of your motivations for going out was the hope that you would see Shoto.

You hadn’t meant to drink that much, you really didn’t have that many drinks but your tolerance wasn’t the greatest. You were having a good time, dancing with your friends. That was until some guy grabbed at you. Instinctually you hit him across the face gaining most people’s attention.

“Did he touch you?” A familiar voice said, your classmate Bakugou stood at your side in an instant with an intimidating glare. He was a bit over the top but underneath it all, he was a nice guy. Mina hung out with his group a lot and you had tagged along at times.

“Yeah.” You nodded. You didn’t have to say another word before Bakugou was dragging him out of the party, his friends Kirishima, Denki, and Sero following along. Mina rushed to your side pulling you out of the party in the opposite direction.

“Are you good?” She asked.

It was nice, the cool air of the night. Your head had been spinning but the ordeal had sobered you up a lot.

“Yeah, I’m okay.” You told her.

“What happened?” A concerned voice interrupted. Shoto approached with concern on his face.

Mina explained what had happened and you saw an anger in Shoto you hadn’t seen before. He moved to the direction he assumed Bakugou had taken the man but you grabbed his arm.

“Can you get me out of here?” You asked him. You didn’t want him getting involved, this had been bad enough. You just wanted to pretend it hadn’t happened.

“Of course.” He said before looking to Mina. She nodded and Shoto placed his had between your shoulder blades and guided you away. “Are you hungry?”

“I could eat.” You answered.

The two of you ended up in a 24/7 diner not too far away. Sitting down in a booth under the fluorescent lights you already felt better just being in Shoto’s presence.

It was quiet. You ordered water and chicken strips. You weren’t sure what to say, you didn’t want to talk about what had happened and Shoto seemed upset.

“I should have been there sooner.” He finally said. “My father called me, held me up.”

Was he blaming himself for not being there?

“Shoto, it’s not your fault. It’s no one’s fault. I’m just happy that I got to see you tonight and to be honest hanging out here is a lot better than at that loud house.”

Shoto sighed but his expression softened.

“I’m glad I’m getting to spend time with you too.” He said.

After that the mood was more relaxed, you talked about different things and laughed at Shoto’s jokes. Once you were done eating Shoto paid for your food, refusing to let you do so before he walked you back to the dorm you shared with Mina.

“Do you want to stay for a bit?” You asked.

“Aren’t you tired?” He asked.

“I don’t want to be alone.” You admitted quietly.

Shoto walked in without a word. You sat on your bed opening up your laptop putting on something to watch before placing it on the table beside your bed. Shoto hesitantly joined you, sitting beside you leaving some space.

In retrospect you probably had a little leftover liquid courage from your drinks earlier when you scooted over closer to him, your leg pressed against his. Or maybe you just needed the comfort of having someone you trust close.

It was nice. The sound of Shoto’s soft breathes, the warmth that came from him, the way his arm brushed against yours. It was all comforting and helped the tenseness in your body melt away.

Before you could stop yourself you rested your head against his shoulder, you tensed for a moment waiting for a reaction but Shoto said nothing. A few moments later you were shocked when he took your hand in his softly. You couldn’t stop yourself from looking up at him. His soft gaze was already on you.

It felt unavoidable, unstoppable, the need to lean up and press your lips against his. At that moment you didn’t think of any consequences the action could have. It just felt right. Shoto didn’t pull back, rather he leaned forward meeting you halfway. His right hand cupped your cheek, you felt so small in his grip. His left hand moved to your waist pulling you closer.

After a moment you pulled back to take a breath.

“Kiss me again,” Shoto said. You smiled at him and leaned in again. You adjusted yourself so you could wrap your arms around him, holding him close. It felt unreal. How could things change so quickly in one moment? In one second Shoto was your friend who you may or may not have a crush on and in the next you were kissing him wondering how you could ever lie to yourself.

How could you not like Shoto? He was so good to you, so interesting in every way. Every day your thoughts drifted to him whether you tried to stop them or not. You couldn’t get him out of your head. When you saw a cute dog you thought ‘I bet Shoto would like to see this dog.’ When you ate at a new place you thought ‘I think Shoto would like the food here.’

How had you convinced yourself you didn’t like him?

“I really like you.” You said pulling back again but keeping your hold on each other.

“I really like you too.” He whispered against your lips, looking deeply into your eyes. “Go on a date with me. Please.”

“How can I say no?” You smiled before kissing him again.

“Hey, how are you doing?” Mina’s voice filled your dorm room as the door opened. You and Shoto froze as Mina stared. “Nevermind, looks like you’re doing great.” She said before shutting the door and leaving.

“I’m never gonna hear the end of it from her.” You sighed.

#todoroki x reader #shoto x reader #todoroki shoto x reader #shoto todoroki x reader #bnha #mha #mha x reader #bnha x reader #todoroki shoto #my writing #au prompts #atruebalance #sfw

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jalapeno-princess · 4 years ago

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Off Limits

Gynecologist Mark X Reader

Word Count: 7.6K

Genre: Angst, fluff, badly written smut (the whole shabang)

Warnings: Fingering, hand job, oral (female receiving) doctor & patient relationship (honestly I was very hesitant on writing something like this (BUT I’VE SEEN KINKIER SHIT ON HERE SO YOLO)

Summary: You’ve been having pelvic pains and after voicing your concerns to your mom, she recommends that you go and see a gynecologist. It’s in that moment when you find out that your childhood crush Mark Tuan is the doctor she is referring to and before you could object, she ends up making you an appointment. Seeing Mark for the first time since he went away for college sends butterflies to your tummy and you don’t think you’ll be able to last through the entire appointment knowing what he is going to have to do to you. You discover that Mark harbors the same feelings you’ve had for him for the entirety of knowing him and little do you know, you are the reason for the fall out of his friendship with your brother.

A/N: Hey guys, I really don’t know where this idea came from and I’m honestly kind of all over the place with the idea of this BUT WHATEVER I’m sorry if it’s uncomfortable but IDK it’s probably my hoe ass fantasies getting the best of me please enjoy (I also was kind of lazy to go in to depth about the smut so sorry about that)

When you walked in to the doctor’s office, you were immediately greeted by the receptionist at the counter as she asked you for your name and time of your appointment. Since you were a new patient, she handed you some paperwork to fill out and informed you that she would call you when it was your time to go in. As you took a seat and began filling out the forms, you couldn’t help but secretly wish your mom went with you to your appointment.

Sometimes you’d forget you were 23-years-old with the way your mom still had to schedule your appointments and there were times that she’d be in the office with you and even talked to your doctor for you. Right now, as you continued to insert your information, you wanted nothing more than for her to be with you, especially because the doctor you were seeing just so happened to be the same person you’ve had a crush on since you were 7-years-old.

Just a few days ago, you called your mom after you finished work and complained about having a dull pain in what you assumed was your ovaries. Being the irresponsible person you were, you hardly ever went to visit your gynecologist which both upset and worried your mom, especially because of the many different diseases and syndromes there were in women’s private areas. After scolding you for being a procrastinator and waiting till something was wrong with you to actually go and get checked up, it was in that moment that she recommended you go and see Mark Tuan.

Mark Tuan was your older brother’s best friend since elementary school. The two of them were practically two peas in a pod. Wherever one went, the other followed. Whatever sport one joined, so did the other. They were just that close; that meant you saw Mark almost every single day.

When you were younger, he would always jokingly bully you; but deep down you knew his playful antics were all in good fun. He would always try to keep you out of your brother’s room as they played video games, steal the last cookie in the cookie jar since you weren’t able to reach it and made fun of the fact that you owned so many stuffed animals.

It was in those moments of teasing that you developed a hatred for the older boy. Whenever he came over, you’d never acknowledge his presence and pretended he never existed. Even at dinner if he were to stay over, you found yourself sitting as far away from him as possible. The longer you held a grudge on him and stayed away from him, the more you realized that you didn’t hate him. No, you were developing a crush on him. But you were too young to even know what feelings were and when you explained what you felt about him to your mom, she thought it was adorable and told you it was puppy love.

However, as you grew older, your feelings for Mark grew deeper and deeper more and more every day. Whenever he laughed or smiled, your heart felt as if it were about to burst from out of your chest. Since he was five years older than you and because he was your brother’s best friend, you pushed the idea of him reciprocating your same feelings to the back of your mind. You never failed to notice how his facial features and even his body grew more defined as the years went on and it only made things harder for you.

You’d have to come up with excuses not to be around him because you’d act like a complete idiot if he was around and the last thing you needed was for anyone, Mark especially to find out that you liked him. Unfortunately, in your senior year of high school, Mark graduated with his bachelor’s degree in psychology and got accepted in to one of the most prestigious medicinal colleges in the country. From the time you met him, Mark made it known that he wanted to be a doctor of some sort.

He always loved helping people and wanted to give back to his community in any way that he could. It was one of the main reasons why you liked him so much and although you were going to miss him, you know his absence was going to be a good thing. You needed to get over him and this was the only way possible.

Your senior year came and went and before you knew it, you were applying to many different colleges all over the world. You ended up moving to New York and attended NYU with the intent of getting your degree in education. Just like Mark, you loved being able to lend a hand to anyone who needed it and the idea of being able to enhance and teach the little minds of children always sent a smile to your face.

As soon as you graduated, you returned back to your hometown with the thought of teaching at your old elementary school. You haven’t talked to or heard from Mark since he left all those years ago, but your mom never failed to update you on his achievements and the fact that he was now a very well known gynecologist. You felt childish when you found yourself cringing and squirming at the idea of Mark having to possibly look at you down there, especially because you’ve daydreamed about being intimate with him every now and then.

He was a gynecologist, it was his job to make sure everything was okay in your vaginal region, so why were your hands clammy and why were you so nervous at the idea of him having to observe your lady parts? Not too long after filling out all of your papers and handing them back to the receptionist, she called you over and had you follow her in to one of the rooms.

“Okay y/n, what brings you here today? Is it just a regular check up or is there something bothering you?” You scratched the back of your neck in embarrassment at the actual reason for your visit before speaking up.

“I—um—I’ve been having pains uh—down there. It’s not so much painful as it is uncomfortable but it does bother me and my mom wanted to make sure nothing is wrong with me.” She nodded in understanding while writing down everything you were telling her. After a few moments, she handed you a hospital gown and told you to remove everything and let you know that Mark was going to come in soon. You’ve seen a gynecologist a few times back in college, but this was the first time seeing one after returning home and you knew you should’ve went and looked for someone else. Who cares if Mark was highly recommended and if he was good? He was like an older brother to you.

Although, you noticed he began to grow distant towards you right before he left and it pained you that he was no longer the happy go lucky pain in the ass that he always was towards you almost your entire life. While you were away at college, you also learned that he and your brother had a little fall out and you believed it was because they went their separate ways and neither of them had time to keep in touch.

The idea of him practically seeing you naked in an environment like this made you extremely uncomfortable and you almost found yourself running out of the entire office completely. You were an adult, you had to suck it up and just deal with the fact that Mark was your new gynecologist.

Changing out of your clothes felt extremely awkward and you felt so vulnerable knowing you were entirely naked under the hospital gown. You knew Mark had to be professional in an occupation like this and you were sure he’s seen quite a few vaginas in his career, so it didn’t matter that the two of you knew each other. You were going to try your best to look at him as your doctor and not the boy who helped teach you how to ride a skateboard so you could make it to your classes on time back in your freshman year.

The soft knock on the door broke you out of your thoughts and as soon as your eyes landed on him, your breath hitched. It’s been almost four years since you’ve seen him and you didn’t think it was possible knowing how handsome he always was, but he became even more gorgeous. Seeing him in a doctor’s coat with a dress shirt, slacks and a tie you recognized that your family bought for him when he first entered college made your head spin. How could someone be this good looking? It wasn’t fair and the toothy grin he was sending your way sent tingles down your spine.

“Hey stranger. How’ve you been? I had to do a double take when I saw your name on my upcoming appointment list. You look great y/n. And I heard you’re a teacher now, congratulations.” You felt as if someone had a hold on your tongue. His compliment made you freeze and you felt so small under his gaze. Why did your mom force you in to making him your new gynecologist and why didn’t you disagree with her? This was going to be a long day.

“I—hi. I’ve been good. Thank you for asking. Yeah, I just started teaching kindergarten a few months ago and I love it so far. Congratulations on opening your own practice although, I can’t say I’m not surprised. You were always so hard working and went after everything you set your mind to.” For someone who was about to turn 28-years-old, his adorable high pitch laughter never changed and it sent warmth to your cheeks. His laugh had to be one of your favorite sounds in the entire world.

Mark was always soft spoken and shy around those he didn’t know all too well but you knew the real Mark and it seemed like he was always laughing whenever he was at your house. There were a few occasions where you made him laugh and it tugged on your heartstrings knowing you were the reason behind such a beautiful sound. You would listen to him laugh all day if you could.

“Yeah, shit was rough but I guess it was worth it. I’ll be honest with you, gynecology was the last field I’d find myself in but the doctor I was studying under recommended it and claimed it wasn’t as cutthroat of a profession as other medical occupations. I’ve delivered a couple of babies and that was pretty cool. I kinda was hoping to go in to pediatrics like Jinyoung, but he always complains about it every now and then but then again, he wasn’t always fond of kids. Ah, I’m blabbering like I always used to—Erica said you’ve been having pains down there. How long has it been going on for?” You began to think about when the pains first started happening and shrugged indifferently.

“Almost a month ago but I didn’t think anything of it. I guess I assumed it had to deal with my period but I’ve had these pains even after my cycle was over.” You were quick to notice how Mark’s eyes never left yours once since he entered the room. He has always been like that since you were kids. Even if he was quite the jokester, whenever you’d talk to him his eyes were constantly looking you over; giving you his full attention. You’d find yourself fumbling your words knowing that he always had his gaze on you and it never seemed to falter. When you heard a soft chuckle fall from his lips, you raised one of your brows and looked at him in curiosity.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to laugh it’s just—you haven’t changed one bit. You were always the procrastinator. Especially whenever it comes to your health and well-being. Remember when you were riding your bike, went over a speed bump, fell off and scraped your knee? Instead of running in the house to go clean it, you took a picture and posted it on Instagram.”

You found yourself laughing along with him when you remembered the exact memory he was referring to. You had just turned 14 at the time and wanting to impress Mark, you decided to try out some tricks that you saw on YouTube. He was a just starting college around that time, and being the delusional little girl you were thinking that maybe one day there could be something between the two of you, you wanted to show him that you were mature enough for him.

However, your plans went to shit the minute you fell off of your bike but instead of crying like you knew you probably would have if you were younger, you took out your phone and snapped a picture of the huge gash on your knee. Mark didn’t hesitate to run over to you the minute you tipped over and politely scolded you before ripping off a piece of his flannel and wrapping it around the wound as a makeshift bandage. That memory was one of your favorites with Mark. He showed genuine concern and worry for you and it made you smile like an idiot knowing he cared about you.

“I know. I should take better care of myself. I’ll try better.” He nodded in agreement before taking a look at his clipboard and returning his attention back to you.

“Okay y/n, this is the part where it’ll probably get weird knowing our history together, but I have to ask these questions as your gynecologist.” From past experiences at the gynecologist office, you knew exactly what questions he was referring to and you took in a deep breath while allowing him to continue.

“Do you drink or smoke?” You shook your head in disagreement. Mark and your brother were party animals. Your parents had to pick them up every now and then from parties because they got too drunk and couldn’t find their own way home. You on the other hand didn’t find the point in getting drunk nor did you want to ruin your lungs over something so unnecessary such as smoking.

“Do you have regular periods?”

“I think so.”

“Are you pregnant or think there’s a chance you are pregnant?”

“No.”

“Are you sexually active?” You knew the question was coming and you dreaded it. It felt weird having to tell him of your intimate life but like he said, it was his responsibility as your doctor to ask you these questions.

“No. Not right now.” If you weren’t staring at the ground in attempts to hide the redness on your cheeks, you’d be able to see the blush on Mark’s. He was just as flustered asking you these questions as you were answering them but he had to be a mature adult and put your past and the fact that the two of you knew each other to the back of his mind.

“How many sexual partners have you had in the last year?”

“None.”

“Bullshit.” As soon as the profanity fell from his lips, that’s when you found yourself looking up at him. What exactly did he mean by that?

“Excuse me?” He must’ve not realized exactly what he said because his eyes widened in shock.

“Sorry—I didn’t—it’s nothing. Forgive me, it’s been a long day. Now, back to the questions.” Knowing Mark for as long as you have, you knew that he was lying. There was meaning behind his confrontation and you were dying to know why the blurted out the word bullshit; but he wasn’t going to say it. It took you back to the last day you saw him. Your family went to see him off at the airport before he left for college and he pulled you in to a tight hug before opening his mouth as if he wanted to tell you something; but nothing came out. It must have not been important and you tried your best to forget about what it is that he wanted to tell you no matter how badly you wish he would’ve said it.

“Do you—uh—do you touch yourself?” Again, you knew he had to ask you that but you really did not want to answer the question. You’d be lying if you said no and you felt weird if he knew that yes, you were guilty of masturbation. Mark was the last person you wanted knowing that you played with yourself every now and then and you were sure he’d look at you in a different light if you told him the truth but when you found yourself nodding in agreement, you knew it was too late.

Seeing his ears turn red made you stifle back a laugh. Was he really getting bashful asking you questions you knew he probably asked every single one of his patients? Did he act so nervous and flustered whenever he had to ask them these questions, or was it because it was you, someone he probably considered a younger sister that he now felt awkward having to inquire about what you did in your free time?

“Okay, now that we’re done with the questions, I’m going to have to uh—check under your breasts to make sure there aren’t any lumps. Then I’ll do a Pap smear. Is that okay—alright? Are you okay with that?” Hearing him stutter as his cheeks continued to darken made your heart warm. You’ve seen Mark get crushes on girls in his grade and it made you green with envy. He always talked so highly about the girls he liked; as if they were one of the seven wonders of the world. You could only dream about being the lucky girl Mark called his. He slowly made his way towards you and gave you an awkward smile before standing right in front of you.

“I uh—I’m going to uh—start now. If it feels uncomfortable or you feel weird just let me know. The last thing I want is for you to feel uneasy and tense.”

You smiled at how much of a gentleman he was being. You were sure he was just as gentle and kind with his other patients, but right now he was treating you so delicately as if he was afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing. Before you could prepare yourself, his hand made it’s way into the hospital gown and right under your left breast.

He gently began grazing his thumb and kneading the skin making sure there was no lump or anything he had to worry about. Feeling his cold fingers against your chest sent a warm sensation in between your thighs. You tried your best not to make it obvious that having him touch you in such a way was driving you to the brink of insanity, especially because it was his job, but you’ve fantasized about being in this situation many times.

Every now and then, you’d find yourself admiring Mark from afar and whenever your brother allowed you to, you’d find yourself playing video games with them and you couldn’t help but stare at his fingers and realize how long and skinny they were. Honestly, his fingers were always so pretty and one of your favorite features on him. You wanted nothing more than to hold his hand and even have his fingers wrap around your neck while he’d pound himself inside of you. It was during your times of self pleasure that you’d pretend it was Mark doing that to you.

Sure, you had a couple of one night stands here and there back in college and you even had a boyfriend back in your junior year, but Mark always stayed in the back of your mind after all of these years. He was all your heart craved and wanted to know. It was foolish for you to desire a relationship beyond what you and Mark already had but you couldn’t help yourself. He was your first love and he’d probably stay on your mind until you found someone who could take his place; if that someone even exists.

You could tell he was hesitant and trying his best not to overstep his boundaries but it was taking every bone in your body not to grab his hand and have him cup your mound while toying with your nipple. To your dismay, he finished with your left side and made his way over to the right, continue his ministrations while trying his best to pretend as if nothing was wrong. Like he wasn’t practically massaging your breasts; like he didn’t enjoy it and want to do more. No, he couldn’t think like that. You were his best friend’s younger sister. There was no way anything could happen between you both; no matter how much he wanted to throw you on to the table and fuck your brains out.

You didn’t know it, but you were driving Mark crazy. He was always so fond of you and he always found you so adorable. Sometimes he felt bad about teasing you, but seeing your adorable puppy dog eyes made it all worth it. The explicit and erotic thoughts that were running through his mind sent off red flags and he knew he needed to finish this appointment with you before he did something he’d regret but not because he didn’t want to.

Mark wanted to show you just how much he’s missed you since the two of you have been apart from each other, but it was just too weird and you were technically off limits to him anyway. Knowing you were his best friend’s younger sister didn’t change the fact that Mark thought you were extremely attractive and that you became even more beautiful and dangerously sexy now that you were a young woman.

You were wearing a hospital gown yet you looked so ethereal and Mark knew himself to know that he was only seconds away from ripping the damn gown off and ravishing you and your body in ways that he’s always wanted to. Finally, he was done with checking for any lumps on your breasts and he felt like a huge weight lifted off of his shoulders. Now came the hardest part. The Pap smear. If he had a hard time touching and practically fondling your breasts, what more when he had to practically have his face right in front of your pussy which he was sure was probably lubricated with your juices?

He was so close to saying fuck it and letting his carnal urges take over, but he knew there was going to be consequences for his actions if he continued to think with his second head. “You’re all clear. Now I’m gonna do the Pap smear and hopefully we’ll be able to find out why you’re in pain. If not, I’m going to have to do an ultrasound. Let me just get the tools, can you lie down and lift your legs up?”

You did as you were told and you couldn’t help but giggle at the coolness against the balls of your feet when you placed them against the stirrups. You watched as Mark began to shake as he made his way through the cabinet, grabbing some gel and the tool used for Pap smears. Seeing him freak out at having to do this made you feel at ease for some odd reason. Probably because you weren’t the only one feeling weird. The tension in the air was so thick, you could cut it with a knife. Once he took a seat right in front of your bare thighs, he lifted up the gown and began his examination.

“I’m going to apply some gel to lubricate you—I um—I’m also going to have to use my fingers but that’s normal. Don’t hesitate to ask me to stop alright?” You nodded but internally screamed at the idea of him fingering you. What were you even thinking? Like he said, it was something he had to do. The Pap smear tool could only do so much and just like he did when checking your breasts for any lumps, he had to make sure there weren’t any lumps in your vulva. Although you couldn’t see him, you knew he was applying some gel on his fingers and you had to bite your lip when you felt him bring his two fingers up to your entrance.

“Ready?” You let out a soft hum and before you knew it, he pushed his fingers inside of you. In order to prevent yourself from coming off as a bigger fool, you bit down on your lip in attempts to keep any sound from falling out of your mouth. Foreplay was always one of your favorite parts of sex and fingering always seemed to rile you up. Sure, this was a part of the exam, but it felt so good.

He began to move his fingers around in order to evenly spread the cold lubricant around your folds and little did you know, Mark was about to scream at how tight you were clenching around his fingers. You were practically soaking to the point where he didn’t think he needed the damn gel. Why were you so wet? And why was Mark ready to risk it all just to have his way with you?

You were sure your lip was probably bleeding with how tight you were biting down on it and before you knew it, the unthinkable happened. A soft moan fell from your lips at his ministrations. You couldn’t help yourself, his fingers felt so good buried in your cunt and you had a hunch that he too was enjoying himself. The last time you had a Pap smear, your gynecologist was quick to insert the gel, did the Pap smear and called it a day. With the way Mark began pumping his fingers inside of your pussy, you knew he was going beyond the actual exam and you couldn’t find it in yourself to tell him to stop. You didn’t want to.

This is all you wanted the minute you first started getting intimate with men. Whenever you had sex, you’d imagine it was Mark loving on your body every single time. There was one instance you almost said his name while another guy was going down on you and you practically bolted the minute you both came. You gasped in shock at the noise and you prayed he didn’t hear it but the growl that came from the back of his throat answered your question.

“Fuck—shit—y/n—I’m so sorry but fuck—this is against the rules and I told myself to never get involved with you in that way but fuck—you’re so fucking beautiful you know that? And extremely fucking sexy—can I—can I continue? You’re so wet and so fucking tight. You’re taking my fingers so—so well—swallowing me so well—shit.”

He continued to pump his fingers in and out of your soaking pussy all the while leaving kisses on both of your thighs. You couldn’t form any complete sentences; you were too in awe at his confession and you had a hard time accepting this was going on right now. Mark Tuan, the boy you’ve harbored feelings for; for over a decade was currently fingering you like his life depended on it. His fingers felt so good pumping inside of you and you couldn’t help but want more.

You knew this was wrong; not only was he your brother’s best friend, but he was a doctor and this was his establishment. There had to be some kind of law that did not allow doctors to fool around with their patient but you weren’t necessarily just a patient to Mark nor was he just a gynecologist to you. The minute you felt him curl his fingers inside of you, you clenched you’re legs together as a way to get him to slow down. Slowly but surely, your orgasm was building and he might have been amazing with his fingers, but this was not the way you wanted to cum.

“M—Mark—m—more. I want—no I need more please.” A stifled giggle fell from his lips and right before you could question him, you felt him lick a strip up at your entrance.

“Fuck.” Everything about Mark never failed to rile you up and excite you. Whether it be his devastatingly handsome good looks, extremely charming personality or his intelligence, he was everything you wanted in a significant other and more. Mark was the blueprint of what you wanted in a man and that’s probably why you’ve been single for so long. Not only did you want to focus on your career and be able to live a free life while you were still young, but nobody ever compared to Mark and right now, as his face was buried in between your thighs, nipping and sucking on your clit, you knew there was no way you’d ever get over this.

Both his lips and his tongue did wonders on your pussy. Hearing him slurp up your juices and hum against your core made you dizzy. If someone were to tell you years ago that Mark Tuan would be eating you out in one of the rooms at his workplace, you would’ve laughed in their face. But here you were, practically screaming in to the pillow that was provided because Mark was giving you head like a professional. He knew exactly what to do to make you squirm and the grip on your thighs made things even more difficult. Your hands absentmindedly made their way to his hair, tugging and pulling on it the longer he continued to lap up your wetness, and before you knew it he was adding in both his fingers causing you to let out a wanton cry.

“Shit—shit—Mark—“ he hummed against your clit and your body warmed up at the feeling.

“Are you close baby?” The pet name sounded so sweet falling from his lips. You’ve heard him call his girlfriends back in high school different terms of endearment and you’d find yourself feeling jealous and wanting him to do the same to you. But you were just a kid in Mark’s eyes at that time. Hearing him call you baby was such an indescribable feeling and you could only hope that whatever this currently was going on with the both of you wasn’t just a one time thing.

When you nodded at his words, you felt him place a soft kiss against your clit as he pulled both his fingers and his face away from where you needed him the most. “You taste so fucking good by the way. I could eat you out for hours. So fucking sweet.” The whine that fell from your lips made you embarrassed; it was obvious you were desperate for release and you didn’t think Mark was capable of being such a tease, but this man was really going to be the death of you.

“Mark what the fuck—“ his lips were warm against yours and no matter how many times you’ve dreamt about kissing him, nothing would ever compare to actually feeling his mouth smashed against yours. The kiss was rough; needy, he began roughly sucking on your bottom lip and bringing it in between his teeth. He joined you on the table and hovered over your lap; pressing himself up against you and your cheeks grew hot once you felt his hard on against your thigh.

You had no words to describe how amazing it felt kissing Mark. He always had the prettiest heart shaped lips and they always looked so soft, so kissable. His lips tasted like strawberry chapstick and it only reminded you of how obsessed he was with applying lip balm back in high school because in his words “chapped lips weren’t sexy.” His hands roamed your body as your make out session continued and to your surprise, he pulled away quickly but only to practically rip your hospital gown off.

“Y/n—are you okay with this? I’m not—I’m not forcing you or making you feel as if you have to do this right? We can stop if you’re not comfortable—I know this is wrong for so many reasons and it’s so immature and irresponsible of me but I can’t stop—you don’t know how long I’ve wanted this for. You—I—I’m in love with you. I’ve always been in love with you for the longest time. Longer than I’d like to admit. You’re an ethereal being you know that? It’s been years since I’ve seen you and my feelings for you have never faltered. If anything, they’ve grown stronger as the days go by. I know—it’s probably hard to believe but I’m telling the truth. It’s always been you y/n. I’m sorry, I chose the wrong time to confess my feelings for you, but I don’t want you thinking I’m just fooling around with you for the sex. I want you, for you. For as long as I can have you for.”

You knew he was waiting for your response with the way he leaned back and looked at you with what you assumed was admiration. His confession made your entire thought process come to a halt. You had a hard time believing this was even happening right now. This was the same boy who stuck gum in your hair and told you girls couldn’t play sports. He was also the same guy who used to walk home from school instead of catching the bus in order to save his money to buy you a present for your 10th birthday. How could he be in love with you?

You’ve seen all the girls he’s been with throughout the years and you were sure he was surrounded with many more mature, gorgeous and successful women. He could get anyone he wanted and with his good looks and social status, he probably had so many women groveling at their feet for him. Plus the two of you haven’t seen each other in forever, there was no way he could still have feelings for you since it’s been so long. You didn’t realize you were holding in your breath until you felt him brush some of your hair back.

“I—I scared you didn’t I? I’m sorry y/n. I shouldn’t have said anything, please forget everything I just said and please don’t say anything to your brother. He already hates me as it is.”

Your mom told you that they had a fallout and that they grew distant from each other and for some reason it upset you. They were friends for over a decade and you were sure they were going to be life long friends. Surely it couldn’t have been the distance that would interfere with their relationship. So what happened between the two of them that caused your brother to end their long term friendship? As the question was on the tip of your tongue, Mark looked at your curious expression and answered for you.

“He found out that I liked you. We were out at a bar one night, a couple of days before I left and I took one too many shots of vodka. I don’t remember how you came up in the conversation but apparently I wouldn’t shut up about how beautiful I think you are and how much I wanted to be with you. I know liking you was wrong the minute I recognized that I harbored feelings for you. Every time I saw you or spent time with you, I had this foreign feeling in my stomach; excitement maybe? Happiness? Love? I kept it to myself for a long time. The age difference and the fact that you were in my life for such a long time already because of my friendship with your brother only reminded me that nothing could happen between us no matter how badly I wanted you. I love every single thing about you y/n. Your quirkiness, your determination, your strength, your kindness, how headstrong you are. You might not think so, but to me you’re perfect y/n.”

You didn’t know whether or not he was done talking, but you wanted him to know that you felt the exact same way. Feeling Mark smile in to the kiss that you initiated made your heart flutter; you weren’t that good with words so you could only hope your actions spoke for you. You brought your hand up to his face and gently caressed his cheek all the while deepening the kiss. Only when you felt his dress pants rub against your naked core did you realize that you were completely bare while he was still fully clothed.

“Mark—“ he brought his finger up to your lips in order to silence you while continuing from where he left off before you interrupted him with a kiss.

“The next day, I woke up with a throbbing headache and a few messages from the guys. I had no idea what they were talking about when they told me that it was best to stay away from both you and your brother and then I watched the video Youngjae sent me. I was so mad at myself. I threw my friendship with your brother down the fucking drain and I knew I was going to lose you too. I think it was a good thing that I was moving away so I could use that as an excuse. I kept lying to myself and told myself that it was for the best but it fucking sucked y/n. Your brother was like a brother to me. I wanted to explain myself, but he wouldn’t listen. Apparently I confessed some things that your brother felt was totally out of line and I don’t blame him. If it was the other way around, I’d be pissed too. And fuck, I missed you so much. Your contagious laugh, your breathtaking smile, the fact that you continued to want to hang out with me no matter how mean I was towards you. If I’m being completely honest, I was more upset with losing you than I was your brother. Pathetic right? God, the more I talk about it the more foolish I sound.”

You began running your hands up and down his back as a way to calm him down and out of habit you placed a soft kiss on his jaw. “Then I’m just as pathetic. I’m in love with you too by the way. I’m sorry it took so long for me to admit it—I’m having a hard time accepting everything that just happened. The reason why I was always so clingy towards you when we were younger was because I admired you so much and I loved being around you. I wouldn’t stop asking my mom when the next time you were coming over was. I lied to you back in my junior year; I wasn’t failing trigonometry. I was actually at the top of my class. I just wanted an excuse to get you to tutor me in order to spend as much time with you as possible. I’ve always had a crush on you. Sure, you were the biggest pain in my ass back when I was in elementary school, but as we both got older, I loved having you around. You never failed to make me laugh at your terrible puns and you may not have meant to back then, but you always took such good care of me and made me feel wanted.”

He smiled against your chest and began teasingly playing with both your breasts as a way to distract you. Mark knew the longer you went in to detail about your feelings for him, he’d probably do something embarrassing that he’d regret later on.

“Can you say it again?” Although you knew what he was referring to, you wanted to continue teasing him.

“Say what?”

“Babe—“ you stole one more kiss before playfully squeezing his cheek.

“I love you Mark. More than I can fathom in to words. So um—what does this mean for us? Where do we stand?” He grazed his finger along your folds that were still extremely wet and throbbing from his previous movement while he was in between your legs. Sure, the confessions of love and feelings for one another were very sweet and heartfelt, but the fire building in between your legs was aching to be put out.

The soft moan that fell from your lips only egged him on more and to your dismay, he brought your clit in between his index finger and his thumb and all but gently began to play with it causing the coil that was already building in your stomach to tighten. “Well, now that my feelings for you are out there, I’d like to finish your appointment, then take you to dinner later on tonight. I’d say I’d wait and take it from there, but I’m very confident in us, in our relationship so I’m not giving you the choice; you’re my girlfriend. Fuck, if I knew how amazing this would be, I would’ve made my move years ago. I’m gonna have to schedule you for a check up at least three times a month. Now—“

He started taking off his pants and his underwear came off soon after; your mouth began to water at the sight of his extremely red and hardened cock. It must’ve been so painful; you had a feeling he’s been hard since he was eating you out more than twenty minutes ago. You brought one hand down to his cock and ran your thumb around the tip. You’ve always considered penises to be extremely ugly, but something about Mark’s made your pussy throb. There was one time back when you were in your sophomore year when Mark was sleeping over at your house and you accidentally walked in on him naked. You were quick to cover up your eyes and run out of the bathroom before you could actually see something, but now you found yourself unable to take your eyes off of his fully erect cock. Not only was he thick, but he was also pretty long and you hated how every single thing about him was perfect. You were also excited to feel him stretch you out and bury himself deep inside of you.

“S—shit. Don’t fucking tease me baby. God y/n, you’re so fucking sexy. I’m never going to get enough of you. I can’t wait to fuck that pretty little cunt of yours. Now hurry up and jack me off you slut.”

You giggled softly while wrapping your hand around his length and pumped him up and down. Hearing his soft grunts while you continued your motions caused you to go faster. A huge part of you wanted to suck him off; giving head was one of your favorite parts of sex and you wanted nothing more than for Mark to face fuck you. However, you were soon growing impatient at the idea of finally becoming one with him. You had all the time in the world now to choke on his dick; you wanted him to drill himself in to you. With the way he was thrusting himself in to your hand while leaving love bites on the juncture of your neck, you had a feeling he had the exact idea in mind.

“Baby, as good as this feels, I need to fuck you—like right now. Get ready to be probed—ow! Come on y/n, you have to admit that was funny. Don’t you get the joke? Ultrasound—probing—okay I’ll stop. You were always so judge-mental of my jokes. Fine I’ll stop, but just know I have no intentions on going easy on you. I had a crush on you for quite some time, I’m going to make up for these last few years of being apart. I love you so much y/n and I plan on showing you right now exactly how much you mean to me.”

#got7 imagines #got7 smut #got7 #mark tuan #got7 mark #mark tuan smut

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10thmusemoon · 7 months ago

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Ok disclaimers being that i'm someone w/ adhd and i acknowledge that adhd presents itself differently in everyone.

The impulsiveness that was Yue Qi's defining character trait was what first led me down this path. So then I've thought a lot about how this would present itself when he was at CQMS and suddenly had a more rigid structure in his life, a lot of it depending on sitting still and listening.

When I write YQY there's always some level of movement going on, whether it's shifting in his seat or subtly flexing his fingers, and focusing is something that takes a conscious effort because of audio processing issues. In my mind, it was sheer determination that got him through the writing/language/etc aspects of learning that he was suddenly thrust into and even then I picture it as having been quite a struggle that he turned inward. Luckily, the physical aspects of cultivation were a good outlet for him and slowly, the structure of the day to day sect life became helpful as well. (I do think that a fucked up day does result in some chaos for him that he has to bulldoze back into order) But he was still impulsive, and pushing his way through what he struggled with got him this far, so of course that's what he'd keep doing. Imagine someone who got by procrastinating in high school and is suddenly met with the consequences of that habit in college.

Being impulsive was fine, it was working, until it wasn’t.

After thinking that SJ is dead, he drastically over corrects. He fucked up in the worst way. There was no coming back from this, everything that he thought was fine before was apparently not.

Now he hesitates too much when he needs to act, thinks about how it affects everyone instead of blindly going forward without worrying too much of the consequences. A lot of this makes him a good sect leader, but it's stifling in it's own way. Like masking 24/7 out of guilt and fear of a repeated, drastic, failure. In the way that people with untreated adhd tend to have depression and anxiety as a result of coping (or not coping) with adhd I think both of these would develop in YQY, further exasperated by the the toll his mental health took by being in solitary confinement for over a year.

(That’s another conversation.)

When he reunites with SJ he's so fucking relieved, so happy, but also deeply ashamed of everything with LX caves and anxious and depressed and maybe feeling an aspect of rejection sensitive dyphoria if the truth comes out about his failure. He’s preemptively accepting that SJ thinks he’s the worst w/o ever telling him the truth that would, sadly, raise SJ’s esteem of him. I do think his RSD would fully fixate on SJ and not on any one else because for the longest time SJ is the only one who mattered. And even then Xiao Jiu is by nature so prickly that there is some leeway because there Always has been for his qi-ge. Even during the QiJiu extras ling xi caves scene there is a sense of care/worry that SJ shows for yqy, so even if their relationship has degraded I do think YQY can sense there is still some regard there, however small.

Also where I hc SJ as having an amazing innate sense of time which also made those years apart drag on, I do think YQY suffers from time blindness and so for him, of course he’s ready to jump back into this relationship where they left off.

It’s a Yin Yu Quan Yizhen situation in a way. Where SJ and YY rely on the world’s judgement to perceive themselves, YQY and QYZ only care about their perception through the reflection YY&SJ provide.

SV characters that I head canon as having ADHD

Yue Qingyuan

Qi Qingqi

Shang Qinghua

Also by Airplane extension, possibly Luo Binghe. No I will not elaborate.

#this is stream of concioisness so idk if this is make sense he just has that vibe to me #svsss #yue qingyuan #shen jiu #qijiu #svsss meta #svsss headcanons

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ill-be-istj-if-no-one-else-is · 3 years ago

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(1) Hello! I know you’ve answered a lot of these already, but I wanted to see if you had any insight for what my type would be. I’m also a 9 but I’m not sure of my wing. I’m 18 and i love to garden, bake, and do calming activities like listen to video game music that gives me nostalgia and calmness. i love to write romance and fantasy because I’ve always loved romance and ever since i was little i loved mythical creatures like fairies angels etc.

(2) in my school and work environment i tend to need lots of practice with a concept before i feel comfortable doing it. especially in school, I won’t understand a lesson unless I can see the teacher doing it and I get a chance to do it myself a few times. this is why math has been a subject that always takes me longer to learn. I also find that I’m pretty directionally challenged; I usually need to walk around the place myself a few times before being able to navigate it on my own.

(3) I’ve had past experiences with walking into the wrong classrooms before and I make sure to not put myself in that kind of situation again. especially in my workplace, I get very anxious when I am requested to do something I’ve never done before. I feel like this is normal for all humans, but I get exceptionally anxious. there was a time I was asked to find a trash bag in our kitchen area, but I had never been in the kitchen before.

(4) After discovering where the trash bag was, I felt more confident the next day to carry out the same task. I often struggle standing up for myself and being assertive. Even with little things like suggesting what I want to do when I’m with my friends is hard. I expressing my opinion as creating conflict or drama. I have a large comfort zone, so when my friends or doing something I’m not used to are comfortable with it especially hard to pretend I’m having a good time.

(5) Often I find myself agreeing to go to a restaurant that I know doesn’t have any food I like or seeing a movie I’ve never watched. i’ve always been very sensitive for both others and myself. It’s very easy to hurt my feelings. (I don’t outwardly confront people in response to criticism but on the inside I’ll feel horrible) I feel I can be very protective of my friends and family. I’m always sure to be kind to everyone including strangers.

(6) I really can’t stand it when I see someone being disrespectful or rude. I’m more inclined to be unorganized and sometimes lazy, but I do take my work seriously. I have a problem with procrastination, but I sense that’s mostly due to my 9 enneagram. When I am focused on work, I can be meticulous to the point where it’s ridiculous (that rhymes). When I took my SATs, I spent so much time on questions 1-20 that soon there was only 15 minutes left to finish the whole thing w/ 50 questions left!

(7) i’m very tenderhearted and I like to think that I’m a good listener. I’m receptive and I’m the kind of person that will listen to you rant when you need it but can also give you advice if that’s what you need. and pretty adaptive and can you change my presentation for whoever it is i’m speaking with. I do this mainly in a way to make sure the other person is comfortable. my family says I can be chameleon like in that sense.

-------

Hi anon,

To be honest have you like...been screened for clinical anxiety? I can't tell if you're just young and very sheltered and don't have more high-stakes experiences (this is very understandable fyi and not a judgement just an observation) or if you genuinely are extremely anxious about walking into the wrong classroom or not being able to find something in a strange kitchen, because if it's the latter I would talk to someone about that and try to type later. And for that matter if it's the former I'd also just wait until you've had a little more time out in the world and try to type then.

There's a few other things that also make me wonder if there's something else going on, like the time management on the SATs and very high sensitivity to criticism/pretty narrow comfort zone - please, please do not feel like you need to divulge any information to me or anyone online, but this is a gentle suggestion that you may have anxiety or some other non-neurotypical stuff going on and I think it would be great, if you have support from a parent or teacher or similar, to see if that's the case.

As such it's kind of hard to type but I do think 9 is a reasonable ennegram and you're probably a feeler but there are cases to be made for either Fi or Fe. High Fi users are much better at adapting their approach for different people, but are also usually a little better at speaking up for themselves (even 9s) and expanding their comfort zone whereas high Fe users are much more routine-based but also often better with procrastination (by dint of Ni or Si) and less good at customizing messages for different people.

#mbti #typing

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logically-asexual · 4 years ago

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okay i'm already procrastinating and i don't plan on sleeping any time soon so here we go.

☆ ✩ my personal ranking for every season 1 Sanders Sides episode. ✩ ☆

i think it's going to be pretty similar to @dukeofonions' but let's see if i find something new to contribute haha. i see you didn't include that one about Patton in the Big Game or whatever, so i'm not including it either xd. also i think i'm going to count Accepting Anxiety as one episode only.

edit: i finished and now i dare you to drink a shot of water every time i say the word spanish or a version of the word comfort and become very well hydrated.

#16 I'm in a Disney Show

(i agree with dukeofonions here) i always forget this episode exists. it was ok in terms of being happy for real life Thomas but as a Sanders Sides episode it didn't do anything. the sides were just giving their opinions but it wasn't very funny or interesting. also i'm bitter because it made me look up the episode he was in and i didn't like it at all. i don't know if i'm too old for those Disney shows now but Thomas was literally the only good part of it, everything else was really dull and boring imo. a waste of time.

however, Logan supporting clickbait is one of the funniest things ever, and i'll never forget it.

#15 Becoming A Cartoon

i didn't hate this episode but it was just .. meh.. you know? several factors contribute to this. one, i couldn't feel much nostalgia for Butch Hartman's shows because i watched them in Spanish, and everything feels really weird when they speak English, i don't like how my old cartoons sound in English. two, it was disappointing to me because we were all desperately waiting for Plot™ and instead they give us this short episode about nothing (oh how the tables have turned now it's the other way around haha). and three, i didn't like the style of the animation :/ their faces and expressions freaked me out, Roman's douchey face still haunts me.

#14 Way Too Adult

here i'm biased because i don't like Patton much, and i didn't back when i watched the series the first time either, so this video was a little disappointingwithout the rest. also it wasn't relatable to me because i am still too young and dependent on my parents haha. but Patton is funny and it's funny to laugh at Thomas' struggling.

#13 The Dark Side of Disney

i've never been a fan of Disney movies. i actually never watched Mulan or the Lion King or Aladdin as a kid, so meh. i liked the ending, though, it was cool to see Virgil have fun and be right for once. it does make me a bit uncomfortable because the way Thomas tries too hard with Virgil's mouth movements and his low voice reminds me of a guy that had made me v uncomfortable not long before watching that video. so an icky feel overall.

#12 A New Year of Lying to Myself

this video was actually kind of fogettable to me. i had a hard time connecting the voices in the song to the characters and idk. i don't love it nor hate it, just .. neutral.

#11 My True Identity

pretty much the same opinion as dukeofonions, again. it's a good introduction and it's good that it was the beginning of it all but on its own it's not very special. i think it's awesome on Thomas to have come up with such a clever idea, like choosing the dad, the teacher and the prince and putting them together and match them with thoughts?? that fit so perfectly?? it really is just very impressive when you think about it, that it was just a random idea he had for a short 5 minute video.

#10 Taking on Anxiety

i liked this video a lot because when i watched it i had recently been a lot on tumblr, and found out through relatable posts that i had anxiety. so watching this video was really fun and it made me happy to feel so seen, specially the intro when Thomas just talks about what it's like to have Anxiety and Virgil is so smug about it.

- ★ -

okay now that those are out of the way things are going to get hard... all the following i love with all my heart so i'm going to rank them based on the smallest things.

#9 Growing Up

once more, Patton isn't my favorite. so that's why i'm putting this here, plus the echo at the end askjhsahg, but i love love this video. i remember we were waiting and oh so ready for the angst of nobody taking Patton seriously. and we received!! i love that though Roman and Logan are antagonists here, they're both so happy about Thomas wanting to have a healthy life. and i just adore the way Logan admits his mistake at the end and asks Patton directly. my heart... also aw.. the nostalgia. i remember none of us knew how to spell Patton's name and were writing it in very funny ways until Thomas and Joan told us lol.

#8 The Mind vs The Heart

when i watched this video the first times i didn't like it much, because i only had eyes for Virgil, but later i came back to it and loved it. so taking that into account i'm putting it here. logicality was the first ship i ever shipped in the show because i saw a gifset on tumblr of Patton screaming "what do you know about love?!" and Logan "apparently more than YOU" and the caption said "MARRIED", and i thought hey yeah... anyway. i love them. they're both my dads since that day.

this video is so so so relatable and i love it. Logan and Patton are so much fun arguing and i love how they compromise at the end and work together. im reconsidering.. i might move it higher? no, fine i'll leave it here.

#7 Making Some Changes

this video was absolutely hilarious. i personally couldn't see it as the Sides still once they were acted by Thomas' friends, i enjoyed it more as that bunch being silly and trying to be the sides but failing in so many ways, while sometimes nailing stuff suddenly. i really don't take this one too seriously as an episode. except Joan!Logan and Valerie!Logan, my beloved... i love how Joan acted as Logan and their voice and that they kept their ace ring on.. there's a reason i had them as my icon for so long. and Valerie looks a bit (a lot) like me with the glasses and dressed in dark colors, plus she spoke Spanish and there's .. no words to describe the joy i felt when seeing/hearing that. wait i'm getting emotional...

#6 My Personality Q&A

when i watched this Virgil was my favorite side and i didn't care much about the rest lol. when i heard his answers i related to him SO much it was scary, and also his voice is so soft and it was all very comforting. it was also when i first starting looking at Logan with more attention, because when he brought up Big Hero 6 and Fall Out Boy and said he didn't sing and would recite it like a poem? it only took a couple seconds but my brain said "me" and never went back.

now this video is a little underwhelming to watch for me, most of the appeal for me was in finding out the answers, and also watching it when we didn't know a lot about the sides. now we know more and want to know more so it's not as fun to me as it was first.

i wish so bad they'd do another one, although i know it would be more difficult with a much bigger audience, i think they can manage and i just need it. the chaos.. the energy.. they all being so savage with each other, learning little random facts about them you didn't expect.. i need it.

- ★ -

oh boy top 5 here we go. the next three are practically a tie. i can't choose.

#5 Alone on Valentines Day

i love Valerie, and the idea of this video was perfect and so perfectly excecuted. every side just giving their crazy opinions on how to woo a random stranger, i laughed SO much. first with Logan speaking simlish out of nowhere? at that point i didn't know practically anything about the sims except that it was some video game and the whiplash of Logan going AYO and the rest killed me. then when Roman whipped out that dialogue in Spanish??? my life was completed. i've never felt more happy than i did in that moment gosh. just the hilarity of Roman's drama, the shock of them speaking Spanish suddenly like that, the absolute JOY of seeing a creator i like speak (may i say) perfect Spanish, the other characters' faces after that.. never been happier.

also the conclusion was so cute. Virgil solving the whole problem without wanting to. i loved it.

#4 Am I Original

i think this video speaks for itself. it was fun to watch them all do the ideas Roman had, plus Logan and Virgil nodding at each other, (i love them so much), plus the angst at the end of Roman's perfectionism, plus Roman's just perfect name. this video has it all.

i think Thomas posted it kind of late at night and i watched it at 7am in the classroom as i waited for my classmates to arrive and the class to start. (i usually was like 40 minutes early to school due to mom’s work). i had to contain my laughter and it wasn’t easy.

#3 Losing My Motivation

i started loving this video after a while, when Logan passed Virgil in the position for my favorite side. but once he did this episode was beautiful. it's so funny and i love Logan and Patton's dynamic so much. and the video also so damn relatable in general. i felt so seen with it because they named all the problems i have when procrastinating, down to Patton's vague explanation of his feelings, it's exactly how i feel every time i want to do stuff. and the plot twist! i can hear the dramatic sound effect and see how they all turn to Logan clearly in my head, and it always makes me smile. plus there's so much Logan angst that can be dug up and overanalized. i love to watch it over and over.

#2 Accepting Anxiety

this video was perfect. everything we wanted. we knew it was coming and it delivered perfectly, better than any fanfic done in the waiting time. the week between the parts was agonizing but in a fun way somehow. i remember precisely when i was watching part 2 in my living room. i screamed. and i cried, a lot. i was feeling terrible at that time in my life and Thomas was such a comforting presence and i can't begin to describe how this episode made me feel.

and later it is always fun to rewatch with all their different reactions to being in Virgil's room, the energy of that was on point. Thomas is such a great actor and the characters where just amazingly performed. plus it gave so much to talk adn think about, the idea of the rooms, lots lots of insight into the characters, foreshadowing, so much. it's just perfect i have nothing else to say.

#1 (for purely emotional reasons, ironically) My Negative Thinking

i think Accepting Anxiety is the best episode of the season objectively but my favorite is My Negative Thinking. because i love Virgil and Logan so much and seeing them argue together was and is great. the comfort.. i can't repeat that word enough throughout this post. it's such a soft video while not being overwhelming with Patton and Roman's outbursts. just quiet (mostly) and clear and with perfectly timed humour.

Logan my beloved.. learning spanish... helping me with my own anxiety.. and their debate was so good. and the fact that they were friends i- i can't. Virgil didn't think Logan liked him and Logan told him explicitly that he did and the casual softness of it i cant even. Logan is happy that he tried.. it's just marvelous. Virgil and Logan as best friends will always be my favorite pair, and their dynamic will always be what i strive for in any relationship i might form, with both sides silently comforting each other within their own limits and realistic perspectives. so nice.

- ★ -

so yeah. that's all. thank you if you read all the way up to here. ♡ ♡ ♡

#sanders sides #thomas sanders #logan sanders #virgil sanders #patton sanders #roman sanders

19 notes · View notes

scandeniall · 5 years ago

Text

no limit to you

pairing: sakusa kiyoomi x reader

summary: “Knew right from the start there was no limit to you.” sakusa’s gonna go far and you know it. a look at your relationship throughout some months. (Started out based on Feels by Kehlani but yeah that went left)

warnings: profanity, starts as college students, manga spoilers about career. implied sex, little bit of angst but for like 10 seconds.

wc: 5.4k holy shit this took me all week

Dating Sakusa Kiyoomi: Year 2, month 6

“He is the Black Jackals big and promising rookie,” Your heart couldn’t help but swell with pride as the speaker's voice carried across the gym (?). Despite the less theatrical introductions awarded to MSBY you couldn’t help but cheer loudly even yelling out the stupid nickname given to Sakusa by his teammates. One that he insists that he hates. “Go, omi-omi!” To anyone else it’d just look like another stale glance at the speaker, but you didn’t miss the tiniest of smile that graces his face.

It’s his time to shine and you’re by his side to witness it all. — Dating Sakusa Kiyoomi: Month 3

The sound of rain pounding against the building mixed with the sound of landing volleyballs and squeaking shoes. The men’s volleyball practice is approaching hour 3 and despite Sakusa insisting that you could have just headed back to your apartment you were there anyways. One reason for it was because you knew with him living so close he didn’t drive to campus and despite his tendencies for cleanliness, that’d he’d swallow his pride enough to catch a ride with one of his teammates to avoid the torrential downpour. You figured he’d at least appreciate a ride from you, whose car he knew was relatively clean instead (clean mostly because he always made cleaning and disinfecting your car a “couple activity” every weekend). Another reason was simply because you missed him and was ready to propose getting dinner together. Waiting for him wasn’t a problem anyways, the row of tables overlooking the gym were quite spacious and you utilized the time to get some procrastinated work done. As your small break and time spent switching between the same 3 apps comes to an end you pull up your Snapchat one last time the camera zooming in on sakusa for a few seconds with the caption “a superstar”. You knew Sakusa would frown and scold you for it later (the guy hates being put on stupid Snapchat), but also knew he secretly like when you showed how proud you were. The man was truly destined for greatness and you knew there were no limits to how far he could go. Of course with the relative newness of your relationship, you’ve never told him that. After one last check to make sure the video posts, music flows back into your ears as you began the last hour stretch. “You could’ve gone home you know.” Was the first thing you heard the second the dark haired male sat in the chair in front of you. Plucking your earbuds out all you could do was shrug. “Now is that anyway to greet your cinnamon apple,” you laughed at the displeased look on his face, or more so in his eyes. He must've put his mask on before leaving the locker room. Sakusa was never really one for nicknames and whenever you’d call yourself something from a vine from a thousand years ago he couldn’t hide the scowl on his face.

“All done for the day?” At his nod of assurance you start packing up your bag as Sakusa just watched. He cringed at how you chaotically just packed your papers and laptop into your bag. No folders, or even a ouch for writing utensils. He’d have to get you one. As you finished picking up and fished your keys out of your bag’s pocket you notice Sakusa pull his mask down as he crossed to step in front of you. Placing a quick kiss on your lips, “thank you for waiting.” — Tap. Tap. Tap. Click. Tap. The sounds of scribbling mixed alongside flipped pages and the soft conversations of fellow library goers. The words of the textbook in front of you were beginning to look like gibberish and with that cane even more unconscious fiddling of your pen, a fact not lost on your boyfriend. The sound being so close and frequent broke him out of his own focus bubble. When you insisted the two of you have a study date, you were unsurprisingly met with the excuse of neither of you having the same major. “It doesn’t matter, we can just sit in the library. It’s spending quality time together Kiyoomi,” you’d told him. And it was true, sort of. After you’d finally got into the groove of studying, time seemed to fly and just knowing he was there was comforting enough. “(Y/N). You’re distracting me.” Sakusa was too blunt for his own good sometimes. All you could offer was a mumbled half assed apology, watching as he attempted to focus on his work again. You however? Were done for the time being, deciding to preoccupy yourself with your phone and taking not so sneaky glances at the man sitting in front of you.

“If you paid as much attention to your work as you did me, you’d be doing better in that class.” Maybe he had a point, but who cared. It's not like you were failing the course. Taking another glace up you manage to catch his eye before responding.

“But you're prettier.”

Dating Sakusa Kiyoomi: Month 7

You felt the dip in the bed first. A warm hand resting softly on your back next. Finally your favorite person’s voice. “You're coming to the game right.” You were so tired that you couldn't even be bothered to turn and face the voice.

“Of course. First home game in a while,” you hum out, eyes still closed basking in the softness of the blanket. The weather had been terrible for the past week, completely draining any energy and remaining motivation you had to finish the rest of the semester. Sakusa, on the other hand, had seemingly been unaffected and you envied his tunnel vision like nature. “I can’t wait to see you win y’know.” Sakusa thanked his lucky stars, that your eyes were still closed, because if not you may have seen the red that dusted the tops of his ears. You could hear the sound of hangars knocking in the closet before inquiring about the noise.

“You don’t have a clean jersey for tomorrow’s game right.” He knew that you had a general school fan jersey, but he meant something more specific. One with his number on the back.

“Nothing is guaranteed. The other team is pretty good too.”

“Yeah well, you're better.” --

Dating Sakusa Kiyoomi: Year 1 If you heard one last critiquing remark from your boyfriend you were going to scream. Or kill him, which currently sounded like the better option. It started with him telling you your kitchen smelled weird, the food cooked hours earlier obviously not Sakusa approved. Next came him cringing as he inquired when was the last time you or roommate had vacuumed the living room. Then came his annoyed look when he noticed your skincare products all over the bathroom counter because you had to rush out this morning. The last straw came as he said something about you getting germs all over your face as you dug the palms of your hands into your eyes. While that one had some validity you were fucking tired. School was sucking, your coworkers are annoying and your boyfriend is a fucking dick. “Can you not try to not be a germaphobe asshole for two seconds, Sakusa,” you exclaim, not even bothering to face him from your spot at your desk. “Do better with cleaning then.”

“What are you, my dad.”

“If I were, you’d know how to clean up properly.”

It was official. Sakusa, Kiyoomi fucking sucks. The tension in the air had grown. Between your pissed stress related retorts and sakusa’s stupid passive aggressive insults the two of you had navigated far away from just arguing about germs. You’d both begun bringing up past situations and feelings that you’d both previously kept buried.

“Half the time I don’t even know if you fucking like me.” That was a lie. He cared and you knew it. But former insecurities paired with his generally aloof nature whenever the two of you were in public caused you to mention it. Insecurties concerning how he was on his way to something great, and that he’d leave you behind with a stupid college degree that you didn’t even know how you were going to use. You’d long abandoned your desk chair, opting to pace around the room. If his eyes were knives, you’d be long dead with the way he was glaring. You hadn’t noticed, but Sakusa even pulled his mask down to engage in this argument.

“Well thats just stupid. But since you're bringing it up, do you even like me,” Sakusa sneered causing you to stop in place.“You’re going out an awful lot these days. Partying more than you used to, aren’t you.” Your state of disbelief hadn’t been lost on him, in fact you looked as if you were going to start laughing at any moment. The way he condescendingly spoke your name sent chills down your spine. “Can’t help but wonder what you’re doing.”

“Oh so now I’m cheating-.”

“I’m just pointing out what I’ve noticed.” He’d hit the realization that he messed up the second the insinuation left his lips. However, he was too far in and so were you. He’d have to make it up to you later, he began to think. Until your humourless laugh filled the air, striking a cord in him, bigger than you’d ever done. This entire night you’d been a ticking time bomb, and were ready to explode.

“Now why the fuck, would I put up with you if I didn’t love you. A year of my life just wasted huh.” The revelation of your love causes Sakusa to pause. Of course the two of you loved one another. It was shown in the little actions. But, until now neither of you had ever uttered the three words to one another.

“(Y/N-)”

“Newsflash, Kiyoomi, you're not an easy person to love. You nag me about shit that only bothers you, and I put up with it. I can’t even come around you with mismatched socks”

“You never want to go out to any kind of party with me and I want you there, yet I’m always willing to go out when you have to with the team.”

“You barely even show that you like me in public. I’ve had friends ask me are we even really dating.”

The end of your rant was accompanied by silence on both of your ends. You were drained. Your throat hurt and your eyes stung. But more importantly your heart ached. Despite the tears building at the back of your eyes you were not going to give him the satisfaction of seeing you cry. Sakusa on the other hand was deep in thought. The tug on his heartstrings at your admittance was foreign. He didn’t want to say anything to further upset you, and had gotten to know you enough to know you’d want to be alone after a time like this.

The hand that grabbed yours almost felt foreign as Sakusa led you towards your bed. The already long day ending with a quick kiss against your temple, a promise to see you later, and an aching heart.

“Did you and Sakusa- like break up or something,” your friend inquired. It's been 9 days since you’d last heard from Sakusa, and your mopey mood hadn’t gone unnoticed by your friends. On top of you being unusually downcast they noticed that you hadn’t attended the most recent match. You always went to home games. You already had to deal with the aftermath of your roommate being home and hearing your argument that night, you hadn’t exactly been that quiet during the ordeal.

The next morning marked the start of the weekend, which you’d spent a large part of the day in bed. In the middle of you bothering to fix dinner, your roommate had come home interrupting your pity party. You liked your roommate, you did and the two of you were friendly. But the two of you definitely were not best friends and for them to come home and see you for the first time post argument- awkward.

“Yo- (Y/N), did you hear me? You and Sakusa break up or something,” your friend repeated, breaking you out of your wandering thoughts. “Or something,” you muttered bitterly. The lunch in front of you suddenly looked unappealing. The melting ice cubes floating in your drink taking away your attention.

Just as you began to take your mind off Sakusa in preparation to try and have a relatively normal weekend, your friend just had to bring him up. You loved her, but she was a dumbass for that one. Your entire car ride home you turned on your breakup playlist one you’d made during the demise of your last relationship back in highschool. Something about Miley Cyrus’ 7 Things felt more relatable than ever now that you were older.

Entering your apartment, you waved a greeting to your roommate who looked strangely happy. “Oh (Y/N), you’ve got a gift.” Ok- why the hell was she so cheery about a gift to you. Eying her suspiciously, your roommate pointed past you and your eyes widened.

“Who-”

“Who do you think? Dropped them off a little over an hour ago. Looked disappointed when he realized you weren’t here.”

You half mumbled something kin of appreciation for telling you as you walked toward the kitchen table to see a bouquet of roses, and a card with neatly scribbled handwriting you recognized immediately.

“One rose for every month of putting up with me being a germophobic asshole. Google also said roses meant love. Hope you like them.

P.s: i missed you at the game (and in general)”

14 roses. He even included the two months where you teetered the line between friends and partners. You couldn’t help but laugh at his use of your word choice to describe him. You hadn’t even noticed your roommate peering over your shoulder until she spoke. “He means well. You two should work it out.” If you weren’t planning to before you sure as hell were going to now. “Yeah,” you mused. “You're right.

The gears in your head were absolutely turning, thinking about how you’d reach back out to Sakusa. Obviously he’d been the bigger person and made the first contact, and yeah he was definitely being a jerk that night, but so were you. You were so caught in your own thoughts as you made your way down the short hallway to your room that you hadn’t even noticed the slight rustling. Opening your door you were met with an even bigger surprise.

Sakusa. In your room, gloved up, vacuum out-He was cleaning? Your room?. Your brain short circuits as you were at a loss for words.

“Kiyoomi?” The sound of your roommate teasing telling you two to keep it down went beyond your span of comprehension as you just stood in the doorway. “You should close the door.

---

After you got past the initial shock of seeing Sakusa, he’d taken his gloves off and sat on your bed wordlessly patting the spot next to him. After a brief moment of silence you were the first one to speak. Afterall, he did take the first step at mending your relationship. Now it's your turn. “I’m sorry Kiyoomi. For snapping at you, questioning how you felt when I knew better. I was a bitch for that one.

“I’m sorry. I was wrong. I knew how stressed you were already and made it worse. I know how you get when you're upset, and came to straighten up for you.”

“Thanks for that one. I’ll admit, it was starting to bother me too.” A silence filled the air as you shifted closer. Enough so that you could rest your head on his shoulder.

“I know you’re not cheating on me-“

“Wow, how did you figure that out. You are SO smart,” you faked gasped. The teasing comment released any lingering tension between you and before you knew it Sakusa had his normal frowny face at you. The one he tended to get when you jokingly teased or annoyed him. One, never meant with any malice. A softer one reserved just for you. The moment passed quickly and as you removed your head from his shoulder you eyed him seriously. “I wouldn't do that Yoomi. You know that right?”

The thought of him even thinking you’d ever cheat on him didn’t sit right with you. In fact, it had been the main reason you were upset. You could work past anything else said. But that one? You needed to acknowledge it. Your question had been answered when you felt a hand gently rest on the side of your neck pulling you gently towards him. You were so close that you could feel the move of his lips as he reaffirmed what was already known. “I love you too (Y/N). The universe seemed to stop as Sakusa's lips moved softly against yours. you had moved your lingering hand to wrap around the wrist touching you, rubbing gentle circles on his inner wrist. A hold that unconsciously tightens as you felt his tongue languidly slip into your mouth and explore.This kiss was different than any you’d ever shared before. Different from the quick kisses shared when you’d two part ways at the end of dates. Different than the domineering good luck kisses given in quiet hallways outside the locker room before games. Than the tired kisses he’d reluctantly give because your tired whining grated his nerves. Hell, even different than the kisses shared the first time you two had sex. Those were just awkward. This kiss? Was loving. You two loved one another. Those feelings had been made more than clear to the other person. The universe always told you that falling in love too fast and too young would end in disaster. But you’d risk that if you could feel like this everyday.

The need for air forced the two of you to pull away. In that time Sakusa had shifted the two of you so that he was resting against the headboard of your bed, your knees resting on the side of his knees. One hand on your thigh, other resting on your back. He looked so pretty like that. Puffy lips, heavily breathing, and with so much love for you. There was no doubt you looked the same. The rest of his forehead on your shoulder allowed you to gently play with his hair.

“I’ll work on the other things too. But don’t expect me to take care of your drunk ass every weekend.”

Dating Sakusa Kiyoomi: Year 1, Month 10

“How’s it going Mr MVP.” You pushed your body off the chilled brick, as you eyed your boyfriend up and down. He looked good, really good. He’d just finished the last game of his collegiate career, one that had been won. Not only that, but he had been named MVP and a rookie to look out for going into Division 1 post graduation.

You shifted your hands towards his face but before you could even rest them near you he stopped you with a mini hand sanitizer dangling in your face. “I’m sure you touched that brick while waiting.” After your hands were as sanitized as they could be, you hovered your hands over the corner of his mask, silently asking for permission to lower it. Once you got the go ahead, and felt his hands resting on your hips you pulled him down for a sweet kiss. After pulling away you left your hands wrapped around his neck and began playing with the hairs at the back of his neck.

“You’re a fucking superstar Yoomi. You’re gonna go so far.” You revealed the thoughts that had been in the back of your mind since you met him. And it was true. You knew he’d been looking at a few professional teams, and no matter where he’d go the sky was the limit.

“Now c’mon. It’s party time babe. Last college win celebration,” you cheered pressing a quick kiss to his cheek, and pulling his mask back out. You followed up by reaching into the pocket of his track jacket to pull out his car key. He kept true with his promise of getting better. Still hated unnecessary crowds, but was willing to sacrifice it occasionally to accompany you to celebratory parties. Granted he tended to hang out on less populated hallways, even better when parties continued outside. More space to move. The mask also stayed on. College kids are gross.

—-

Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you noticed your boyfriend move from his spot on the couch. The two of you had decided on a lazy movie night before the official finals grind began. Dead week was nearly here, and you knew the two of you would have little time to actually hang out. With the end of volleyball season, you’d been spending more time at Sakusa’s place deciding to just head there after class because it was closer. “Yoomi where are you going,” the wording came out more needed than you intended. You didn’t receive an answer, instead met with him disappearing in his room. You decided to just pause the movie, pulling out your phone to reply to a few text messages. Just as you hit send a Manila envelope was placed in your peripheral and Sakusa settled back into his corner of the couch.

“What’s this,” you questioned, shifting so that you were looking at Sakusa. The only thing you were gifted with was a shrug and a motion to open the envelope. You hesitated a moment before your eyes widened

“Wait. Kiyoomi is this…”. The confident smirk told you everything you needed to know. This was it. There was no secret that Sakusa was most likely going to go pro after graduation, but no one knew what team he’d end up playing for. He’d had many people; Professors, coaches,teammates, acquaintances, parents ask what he planned on doing now that graduation was essentially on your doorsteps. No one ever got an answer out of him, including you. He hadn’t even hinted at any team preference to you, brushing it off and changing the subject whenever you tried to see where his head was.

“Are you gonna open it or just stare.” You noted the slight waver in his voice, one that would have gone unnoticed to any ear untrained in the study of Sakusa Kiyoomi. You didn’t even know why you were so nervous, it wasn’t even your career. Taking a deep breath you pulled out the stack of papers, eyes drifting to the first paragraph mumbling the words aloud.

“We are excited to have you. We welcome your commitment to MSBY Black Jackals-“ you would have dropped the stack of papers had you not had them tugged out of your tight grip and placed on the table in front of you. “Holy shit,” you exclaimed, launching yourself at your boyfriend (uncomfortably knocking him against the corner of the couch, but he’d let you have this moment.)

Next you started babbling about how proud you were of him in between kisses all over his face. (Another thing he’d let you have for the moment despite the feel of your lip balm also sticking onto his face”). You were so happy for him, that you didn’t even notice the blush making its way on his face. His hand settling themselves on your waist, he basked in the attention from you.

When the shock managed to wear off, you had settled yourself into his lap. Sitting sideways, you had one hand playing with his hair, the other picking up your phone to record a video.

“And today, we have the greatest volleyball player in the world commuting to the greatest team in the world,” you beamed the front camera on you both.

“Look at that future (Y/N), Yoomi isn’t even swatting the camera away tonight. Looks like he looooooves me for once-“

“I always love you. You’re just annoying sometimes.” The jest was meant with a light kiss on your clothed shoulder before you continued, this time facing Sakusa instead of the camera

“Y’know. I knew right from the start there was no limit to you,” you spoke softly, eyes beaming.

“Is that so.” A real smile graced his face, as you moved the hand previously playing with his hair to gently trace over the moles on his face. “Thank you for believing.” You felt Sakusa take your phone from you cutting the camera. What took place after, definitely didn’t need to be caught on camera.

—

The sun is beaming. The weather is incredible . You were high on happiness, adrenaline, pride and maybe a little bit of caffeine as you currently posed for what felt like your millionth picture in the past 5 minutes. You hadn’t even found your family yet, surrounded by 100s of your peers all celebrating the same accomplishment. You did it. You were a college graduate. You had a degree. You felt another tap on your shoulder, as you happily screamed to your friend you’d made being in the same program.

“Dude I can't believe it!”

“Dude me either!” As the two of you took a quick selfie, your mind wandered to where and how Sakusa was doing. You hadn't seen him at all yet considering you both spent the mornings with your families who came into town. You wondered how he was doing with this whole thing. There were a shit ton of people out here after all. Before you could dwell on it, you felt your phone vibrate with none other than the man himself. You chuckled, already sending his irritation through the message as he told you to come to walk west, at the very edge of the crowd that was growing by the minute in the center. You sent a quick text to your mom about where you’d be, knowing your family were going to want a ton of pictures even with Sakusa.

Your excitement grew further if even possible as you finally found him, throwing your arms around his neck into a tight hug, swaying the both of you. “We did it, Sakusa,” you said, finally pulling away and eying him. He’d taken his cap off already, opting for holding it instead, and having unzipped his gown.

“We have degrees now,” he confirmed using his free hand to grab yours. “It’s too many people here.” All you could do was laugh as you eyed the control chaos going on just across the courtyard from you. You felt an odd sense of peace, just watching. The flowers planted just for graduation season even looked beautiful. Something you may not have paid nearly as much attention to had you not been dating Sakusa.

In fact, if you weren’t dating him you knew you’d be in the middle of the chaos right now. Still happy no doubt, but being able to get away from it even for a few minutes felt amazing. You’d both be thrown back into it in a matter of minutes, squeezing in the last set of pictures with best friends and holding conversations with people you’d have to get used to not seeing several times a week. You knew that Sakusa was almost guaranteed to be forced into a picture with the other graduating volleyball players.

“My families heading over I’m sure,” you hummed bringing your eyes back to Sakusa's profile. The look on his face slightly confuses you. You couldn’t quite tell if it were nerves, irritation, or just a result of squinting from the bright sun.

“We’re gonna have to head back in soon”

“Do you want to move in with me”

The two of you spoke simultaneously. It was official. This is one of the best days of your life.

Dating Sakusa Kiyoomi: Year 2, Month 4

“I’m gonna start dinner alright,” you called out as you pulled on one of Sakusa’s clean practice shirts and a pair of his old college sweats. Yes they were big,but they were more comfy than your own. Besides it was nothing a little, (read;a lot) of rolling and cuffing couldn’t fix. It was also his time of the month where you let him control the thermostat, and you’re cold! You’d just gotten out of the shower, him getting in shortly after coming home from a training day. The gym showers only do so much and he needed his own body wash is what he insisted the first time he came home and rushed immediately towards the bathroom.

You pulled out the sheet of paper with a recipe printed on it, courtesy of your co-worker. Earlier in the week you mentioned how you were craving chicken but no other recipe in your arsenal seemed appealing. Lo and behold you were given a sheet of paper with a recipe that apparently his family loved after experimenting with a few online recipes.

Before beginning you connect your phone to your speaker hitting shuffle. You manage to get all the ingredients out before a large knock sounds at your door. Confused, you yell out asking Sakusa if he was expecting anyone. You noticed the sounds of the shower ceased a few minutes ago, and that Sakusa would likely come to keep you company (more like sanitize the spice bottles the second you put one down.)

“Of course not,” with a shrug your wash your hands before gently opening the door. There’s a man. An attractive one- who looks oddly familiar. Wait, that guy is on Black Jackals, you note. Miya, Atsumu.

“Um hi,” you greet sounding more like a question, opening the door a bit wider.

“Shit! Did I come to the wrong apartment? I'm looking for Omi-Omi,” you noticed him trail off eyeing the shirt you were wearing. Omi-Omi? Sakusa must’ve heard him because the way he sprinted into the living room showed a scowl evident on his face. It even caused you to back up as Atsumu entered in.

“Why are you here. And how did you find where I live,” sakusa for right to the point.

“Aw c’mon Omi-Omi what if I missed ya. You left your earbuds in the locker room. Turned on you find my friends and matched the mailbox.” The glare on Sakusa’s face was one you recognized only when you genuinely irritated him. Not the one where he pretended to be annoyed but secretly wasn’t.

“But enough about that. How come you didn’t tell me you were dating. I thought we were friends. Omi-Omi,” Atsumu whined out arms crossing over his chest. As you were looking at his arms/ respectfully/ you jumped in a teasing pout of your own.

“Yeah Omi-Omi. Not telling your friends about me. A shame”

“Not you too.”

—

Dating Sakusa Kiyoomi: Year 2, Month 6

“You excited,” your question causes another wave of conversation between the men in the pre waiting area. Warmups were set to start in about 20 minutes. Shortly after you met Atsumu, he’d insisted you be introduced to the entire team. Afterall, other significant others got to hang out sometimes. Today was the day. Sakusa’s biggest match of his professional career yet. MSBY Black Jackals V Schweiden Adlers.

Receiving a mix of enthusiastic expletives, you turn towards your boyfriend who has yet to answer, prompting you to tease asking if he were nervous.

“No. We’re going to win,”

“That's the spirit Omi-Omi! Gonna beat Wakatoshi this time,” This time you bit back your laugh, smirking at the Miya twin’s jest. You loved getting able to take a break from being annoying. Sakusa, as per usual, noticed it. Getting up he motioned, that you follow him outside, ignoring the teases of getting a good luck kiss.

The minute you two rounded the corner of the hallway, a warm hand enveloped yours. Your confused look prompts your boyfriend to cage you against the corner of the wall. His unoccupied hand resting against the side of your head.”

“I am excited.” While his expression remained unchanged, The look in his eyes said it all. It was the same twinkle he showed that time you two made up after admitting your love. And the one present after revealing his commitment to MSBY to you. “And you are going to win,” your reiteration caused a soft smile to catch his face.

“Here's to you and your first major game Kiyoomi. And to many more because you're a star. Now go win.”

a/n: well this has been a roller coaster. I challenged myself to write 5k words, and 95% of this was written at like 3am bc thats when i go to sleep. I also did this to try and gain a feel for him so i can finish his part in good & the bad series. I really do be hoping this aint too ooc, bc while im caught up on the happenings of the manga from spoilers and twitter, i haven't actually gotten around to reading that far myself. also sorry for shitty formatting, ive never actually written a single body with this many words in a singular part ??? also i didnt edit this past google doc feature sooooo

anyways i did work hard and on this for the past week in between finals as a college junior so any comments and feedback are appreciated

#haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #hq imagines #sakusa x reader #haikyuu imagine #sakusa imagines #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu headcanons

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writingsforanyone · 5 years ago

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Forgotten Fling 1/7

Pairing: Brett Talbot + Y/N

Warnings: None

a/n: i haven’t written anything in like a year but i thought i’d give it another shot so if this is awful i’m sorry!! pt. 2 will be out soon!

You shot up from your desk as the bell rang signaling the end of class, and rushed out of the classroom and into the hallway. Before you could make your way to your locker, you saw your younger brother Liam fast walking past you, his best friend Mason on his heels.

“Liam. Wait. LIAM,” you heard Mason say as you jogged up to meet them.

“Brett!” Liam said, making you freeze and your eyes grow wide. You watched as the 6’2 blonde lacrosse player stepped off the Devenford Prep charter bus and looked directly at Liam when he heard his name.

“Ahh here we go,” Mason said from beside you.

“I just wanted to say… have a good game,” your brother said as he stuck his hand out. You and Mason looked at each other in confusion, expecting a much louder and meaner introduction from the sophomore. Brett and the other Devenford Prep lacrosse players started laughing before Brett spoke up.

“That’s cute Liam. Is that what they told you to say in anger management? Apologize and everything is fine? You demolished Coach’s car”

“I paid for it,” Liam answered, obviously tense.

“Yeah, you’re gonna pay for it. We’re gonna break you in half out there. And it’s gonna be all your fault,” Brett finished.

At that point, you had had enough of Brett’s antics, and when you saw Liam clenching his fist and blood dripping from his hand, you pushed your way past the small crowd that had formed and grabbed your brother’s arm.

“Come on Liam. He’s not worth it,” you said glaring at Brett before beginning to walk away.

“Me? Not worth it? That’s not what you were saying a few months ago babygirl,” Brett said with a smirk, causing you to turn back around.

“People change Talbot. Not surprised that you haven’t,” you retorted, turning around and grabbing Liam, walking past Mason, Scott, and the rest of the pack who all stood back in confusion. You heard Stiles start talking trying to defuse the situation, but you continued walking with Liam back into the school to calm him down.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

You pulled into the Beacon Hills High parking lot later that night, dropping Liam off early for his game. You wanted to stay and watch, but you had procrastinated an essay that was due in two days, and you needed to go home and work on it. Regardless, you walked toward the bleachers and slumped down next to Lydia and Malia. You were obviously in a bad mood, and looking over at Brett pulling a shirt over his head didn’t help. He turned towards you and made eye contact with you, but after a moment, you tore your gaze away from him. That caused Lydia to ask,

“So what exactly was that about earlier?”

You knew exactly what she was talking about, and you knew the question was coming. You took a deep breath before explaining your history with Brett.

 “Brett and I had a habit of hooking up, very often. We would call the other whenever we were bored, lonely, sad, mad, whatever the case was. Sometimes it wouldn’t even be to hook up, it would be because we simply needed someone to be there for us. At school we would talk in our classes or in the hallways, we’d go to each others games, and we would always go to parties together. We would flirt with other people and talk to them, but at the end of the night we always went home with each other. Everyone thought we would eventually get together, but we never did. We were just friends, who had a bad habit of hooking up with each other,” you finished, kind of relieved to have gotten all of that off of your chest.

“If you guys were friends and all, what happened earlier at the bus?” Malia questioned.

“When everything happened with Liam and the lacrosse team, Brett started to be an ass to Liam at school, at practice, everywhere he saw him. When Liam told me about it, I confronted Brett, and he basically told me I had to choose between him or Liam, and I obviously chose Liam,” you sighed. With that, you bid your friends farewell, and walked down the bleachers towards the rest of your friends. You gave them hugs and wished them good luck, making sure to give your brother a few extra words of encouragement, knowing he would need it. You started walking towards your car and heard the game start in the background. You wished you could stay, but you needed to write your essay, and the thought of being in the same vicinity as Brett Talbot made you want to gag. You unlocked your car and threw your purse into the passenger seat. You climbed in and drove out of the parking lot, heading straight for your house.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Sitting on your bed, typing away at your computer, you had managed to write almost 3 pages since you had gotten home. Clad in your favorite gray sweatpants and a blue cropped t-shirt, and hair thrown in a messy bun, you were in your zone. Suddenly, your phone rang, startling you. You checked the caller ID and saw that your brother was calling you.

“Hello?” you answered, wondering if you were supposed to go pick him up.

“Y/N I’m at the animal clinic with Stiles, Derek, and Brett. Brett got hurt and Deaton is trying to help him and he won’t calm down and he’s going to— never mind. We need you down here you have to come calm him down.“ Liam rambled. You cut him off by saying,

“I’m on my way,” and hung up the phone. You jumped out of bed and shoved your feet into the closet pair of shoes you had. You grabbed your keys and sprinted down the stairs, out the front door, and into your car. You headed towards the animal clinic as fast as you could go with getting pulled over.

When Liam first told you that Scott had bit him, you weren’t as shocked as he thought you would be. Sure you were shocked at the fact that Liam had gotten bit and there was a whole pack of werewolves at your school, but you already knew werewolves existed. Brett had told you about the supernatural months ago, and he also told you that he was a born werewolf. He explained to you that born werewolves had better control over their inner wolf, and that anchoring themselves was easier. However, over the months that you and Brett were having your little fling, he told you that you became his anchor, and you were the reason he was able to stop himself from wolfing out. He called you every full moon and asked you to come stay with him, and you would. You would hold him and stroke his hair to help him fall asleep, knowing that if he was asleep, he would be ok. You snapped out of your thoughts as you pulled up to the clinic, wiping the few tears that you realized had fallen from your eyes. You ran into the clinic and into the back room, and saw Derek and Stiles trying to hold Brett down.

“Derek, how about a little werewolf strength,” You heard Stiles say.

“I’m not the only one here with werewolf strength,” He argued back, and you immediately went over the the table. Brett was thrashing back and forth and there was yellow stuff coming from his mouth. You put you hands on both of his cheeks and turned his head towards you, and Derek and Stiles continued to try to hold him still.

“Brett. Brett. Can you hear me? It’s Y/N. I need you to look at me ok? Focus on my voice,” you said. You didn’t notice the few tears that fell from your eyes and onto the table, only focusing on Brett. He looked up at you and started to calm down a bit, but he was still breathing heavy and you could tell he was in pain.

“Hey baby,” you chuckled through your tears, glad that you were still able to calm him down like you used to. Suddenly, you heard something fall, and looked over to see that Liam has knocked something over. With that, Brett started to thrash around again, and he pushed Derek and Stiles away from him. You jumped back and watched as he jumped up from the table trying to find this way out. Someone punched him directly in the face and he was knocked unconsious, and everyone looked over to see Peter in the doorway.

“I guess I still have a little werewolf strength myself,” Peter said.

“Maybe more than a little,” Derek said back, as Stiles moved over to Brett, who was lying on the floor.

“Hey Doc, I don’t think he’s breathing,” Stiles said, and you moved over to kneel next to him. You watched as Deaton made an cut in Brett’s chest, and a cloud of yellow smoke was realized. He started breathing and you smiled as deacon said,

“He’ll be fine, but he’ll probably be out for a while.”

You heard mumbling and turned to see Brett trying to say something. You leaned down and heard him whispering,

“The sun, the moon, the truth,” to himself.

“It’s his pack’s mantra. Satomi’s pack,” you said to the others, remembering how Brett had explained it to you. With that, you moved to grab paper towels from the counter, and began wiping the yellow wolfsbane from Brett’s face and chest. You then stood up, wondering if you should wait with Brett until he woke up.

“He probably wouldn’t want to see me, especially not after this,” you mumbled to yourself, forgetting that the 3 werewolves in the room could hear you. Liam looked over at you knowingly. He knew you eventually grew feelings for Brett as your fling went on, but he never said anything to you about it. He just knew. You grabbed your bag and walked out of the room and out of the building, waiting for Liam to follow so the two of you could go home.

#teen wolf #teen wolf imagine #teen wolf imagines #brett talbot #brett talbot imagine #brett talbot imagines #scott mccal imagine #stiles stilinski #liam dunbar #lydia martin #malia hale #kira yukimura #mtv

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into-september · 3 years ago

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I was t agged by @marrys-dream-world, thanks a lot! I've never been one to ignore the chance to talk about myself.

I think all the MLB people I know to write fic have been tagged, so I’m passing this on to @subdee and @aella-a:)

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 20

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 55980

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they? 13, if you count the Digimon series separately: Pokémon, Digimon 02, Digimon Tamers, Digimon Frontier, Digimon Data Squad, Gravitation, Hikaru no Go, Cardcaptor Sakura, Fullmetal Alchemist, Hetalia, Kyo Kara Maoh, No. 6, FAKE, Miraculous Ladybug,

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Vagary

I Shall Never Know That Second Death

Baking Soda

Skinless

Homeward Bound

5. Do you respond to comments, why or why not? I’m about to be politically incorrect, but here goes: Yes, I do, or at least I try my best to remember to. Sometimes because I honestly have things I want to discuss with the reader and chatting with my friends is always fun, but sometimes because I hung out at Fandomsecrets for long enough to know that there are a lot of people who get butthurt by authors who don’t appreciate the effort it took them to write a four word comment. Forgetting to reply for three weeks is bad enough; I don’t want a reputation of being an arrogant snot on top of it even though I personally don’t expect authors to reply to “omg this was so cute ^_^”

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

FUN STORY a year ago I sat down and rated the angst level of nearly every fic I’ve written, and did the stats and posted a graph and everything.

The fic that prompted that particular embodiment of procrastination is currently the winner if we go by number of comments informing me that the reader is now crying in the middle of the night, but that has more to do with the size of the fandom and that kids these days apparently don’t go to Sunday school.

My personal nomination is Sugar Sickness, because it is raw and desperate and hopeful and he finally understands that the person he truly wants is the boy and then bam, final line, he chose the girl anyway. (warning: I wrote that in high school and I am ESL and both kinda show, ngl)

7. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending? idk the one with the literal happy ending hur hur

Another Digimon Tamers fic with a saccharine title - Cotton Candy Kisses. ESL high school warning applies here too and the opening is super messy and I’m 98% certain that no Japanese person would get into some public kissing contest. I still really like the way I managed to take something so externally insignificant and turn it into not only a monumental narrative win, but one that twists from cynical to sincere and leaves everything changed in its wake.

8. Do you write crossovers? If yes, what’s the craziest thing you’ve written? No amount of crazy can top Ace Attorney canon, and as of SoJ I maintain that it is completely on brand for Apollo Justice to have been adopted by a couple of intrepid Belgian journalists whose black-and-yellow fantasy monkey is innocently accused of manslaughter (no, I never finished it. Blackquill was the prosecutor because obviously Klavier was too much of a fanboy and he and Athena spent the entire investigation marveling at how Apollo never told them about his famous dads)

9. Have you ever received hate on a fic? I wouldn’t count it as hate myself, but you know. Someone who read a summary and still saw fit to read the story and comment to inform me that kink is harmful and please think of the children. On a kink meme fill.

10. Do you write smut? If so what kind? Yes, but almost all of was for kink memes in fandoms I weirdly didn’t write other fic for. No, I’m not hunting down those links.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not fic, to my knowledge, but I remember that there was an apprenticeshipping fic that used the same situation and narrative device a few weeks after I wrote Awake (HS ESL yadda yadda why am I linking to these stories). It was more flattering than anything, haha

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? No

13. Have you ever co-written a fic? No

14. What’s your all time favourite ship? I can’t name just one. At the moment it’s the Love Square (four ships for the price of one!), but if history is anything to go by, there will come a day when someone else has all my attention

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? I geneally only write oneshots and don’t post WIP, but honestly - the epic Kyo Kara Maoh fic I wrote maybe half of for Nanowrimo a decade ago because I really wanted that 50% discount for Scrivener. It started with Conrad becoming the king of Big Cimaron and went on to have Yuri kicked off the Demon King Throne because he never got his powers back, Wolfram reluctantly taking over, plotting to have Saralegui take over BC so Conrad could go home, and it ended with an epic display of brotherly love during the epic final battle.

The real fun part was that I just added characters from other anime into the sizeable background cast. There was The Demon Queen from Maoyu as an intrepid academic, Rosette Christopher as a hypocrically demon-hating noble, The Samezuka High School relay swimming team as Conrad’s personal guard, Oscar Francois de Jarjayes as Wolfram’s right hand woman and Juliet Fiamatta Ars di Capulet as a Blue Wind copycat and his star-crossed love of which nobody ever spoke (not to worry, Romeo Candore van di Montague was the noble son driven to patricide of the story’s big bad). Also including: Kanba, Shouma and Himari Takakura as the victims of someone’s evil magical scheeming and Ed and Al Elric as the kids who escaped it but not unscarred.

The funnies part was that I got to give all these characters German names thanks to the setting. Shouma Takakura became Johannes Habicht, because Shouma --> Shaun --> Jean --> Jehan, which in German is “Johannes”.

It was years later that I learned that Shouma and Kanba are allusions to a children’s story wherein the two main characters are Giovanni and Campanella.

“Giovanni” is the Italian version of Johannes, and I’m still not over that.

So yeah. I put a lot of work and love into that fic, and the main reason I’m not putting any more is that there’se like five people left on the internet who would be interested in reading it.

16. What’s your writing strengths? The irony is that I’m really great at smut, if I dare say so myself. (note: the above happy ending is not smut by my standards). I’ve als got a knack for capturing characters’ voices, though for some reason I struggle with this with MLB

17. What’s your writing weaknesses? Plot. I’m very good at having characters talk at each other and carry out lengthy introspective. Having them interacting with their environment and making decisions with consequences? no please

18. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in fic? You don’t look clever doing it, so cut it out. Using honorifics for Japanese dialogue is okay.

19. What was the first fandom you wrote for? Pokémon

20. What’s your favourite fic you’ve written? Here’s a story:

I am not a fan of FAKE. It’s an okay manga - very trash, much garbage, but the chemistry between Ryo and Dee is REAL even though the rest of it is utterly useless. I could have forgiven that if I wasn’t alive in a time where people were misreading Gravitation in tragic attempts at what we later would call “performing woke”. I was very much a fan of Gravitation, and the way people would accuse it of ew evil uke seme and rape glorification and whatnot while simultaneously praising FAKE for not being that (sure jan) and also for having “great female characters” (uh huh) and everything else that was good and sacred in 2005...

yeah, I had very little patience with FAKE.

That did not stop me from writing one thousand words of quiet, life-changing epiphany set in that universe.

It’s not the best story I’ve written, but that epiphany feels like the most important thing I’ve told yet.

#fanfic #writing #me #blah

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s-mething-mbti · 4 years ago

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Hello! I just found this blog, I am so happy! I am sorry for the verry long ask here but could you help me figuring myself out??

Before starting, I am a 20 y. o girl and I have anxiety disorders... Also, I am not really fluent in English. As I can read and understand very well, writing is always a bit tricky...!

1. I first took tests (I saw somewhere it would be more appropriate to say "questionnaire" as there is no good or wrong answer, but I don't really know haha). I got INFP, and just went with it. A year later I took other tests and got the same results, but I did not really think it "clicked" as I thought these tests did not take enough into account...

So I tried looking into cognitive functions, kept a record of some of my behaviours and why I reacted some ways... But the more I looked into it, the less I could narrow down to fewer things. Thus I figured I could need help in order to find at least a direction for searching ^^'

2. I absolutely love reading the same books over and over again, watching all over again the same series to the point I know them by heart. I could go all day binge-watch or binge-reading the for the 15th time the same thing. I also love reading reactions from people about these same series / books! I also absolutely love daydreaming. Many times, I stop every 5 pages or 6 minutes of watching to run in my flat to get a shoot of fantasies (sometimes fueled by what I was just watching/reading). Outside from home, I love going to bookshops (2 to 3 times a week, preferably during off-peak hours, I am not comfortable at all in crowded places).

3. I kind of think I am not someone really pleasant to live with. I speak a lot, I love speaking, but I don't listen (mostly because I can't concentrate on it, I am focused on showing I am interested in what I am not listening to by noddind or maintaining eye-contact, and also a lot of times at home because I don't care). In fact, I can only concentrate on what is said if it involves one of the things I read or watch again and again or if it is a subject I really like. Also, at home, I tend not to do what I am told, because I want to show that I could have thought about it and done it by myself. However, when I am outside, with other people, I am unable to say "no", even if I end up not doing it, or I find excuses not to do it or not to accept it and feel bad about it.

4. My friends, and even my mother, told me I was very kind, bordering too kind. Taking in account what I said in (3.) I don't understand how they can think that...

5. Leadership: I really dislike taking leadership. I don't want and am scared to impose my view on others (and most of the time I just have nothing to say, head empty). At school I hated group work except if it led to an oral exam (oral exam alone is worse than everything, I cry in front of everyone, so if someone can speak with me or for me it is better). However, if no one gives direction, I take the very minimal lead because otherwise the work would not be done at all and we would spend hours looking at each other (I would only say "I could do that, what are you most confortable doing? And I can also reshape/review the text at the end if you want" ). The only thing I am confident with in group work is proof-reading, I love correcting mistakes, in fact I can't let a mistake pass if I see one (I must be so annoying...).

Self-expression: I love saying how I feel to my close friends, like I want them to validate my feelings. I often ask "how are you" firstly out of courtesy, and secondly because they will ask me in turn and thus I can say everything I want to say. In fact it is often self-pitying. But if someone tells me to move on because it would not make things change, I might start being harsh or lash-out. At the end of the conversation or after parting, I almost every time feel bad because I finally notice that I did not ask anything or enough to my friend, and that it is wrong.

Also, I rarely interact with people on the bus or in the streets even if I sometimes really would like to. But if I do so it is mostly in order to show that I have knowledge on the subject in question, and only after that in kindness.

However, I hate asking people to do something for me (except little things like passing me the salt or giving me a glass of water). If I do so, I fear that people are reluctant to do it, or do it because they have to. I would prefer if they proposed it by themselves and if I could be really sure that they are doing it because they want to.

6. Novelty : it would be true to say i dislike change or novelty. Several facts: when I was 2 or 3, I didn't like watching new movies, so my mom had to put them in background, and I would pick interest later. In primary school I cried an awful lot because we were throwing away our broken sofa. At the end of middle school, I didn't want to go to high school because I felt better as things were. Same thing at the end of high school, and same again at the end of my 3rd year of university. Right now, new metro lines are in construction. I think of metro network as my playground (I love taking the metro), and the fact that the network as I know it will change somewhat makes me uncomfortable. I always prefered how things "were before". (I think it feels kind of confortable this way)

7. I procrastinate a lot. So much in fact. I hate being late because it is disrespectful, but I am always just on-time or late. I am also disorganised and can't follow plannings. I guess I am too lazy...

Another thing is that I am obsessed with identity. Pinpointing who I really am has been an obsession for many years. If I could be unique by knowing who I am, it would be a great accomplishement to me. When I was young, I would have an obsession for wearing items of a certain color because it was my trademark. Same for favorite animal or favorite season. It leads me to be quite envious at times.

Also, I often think of what impact my behaviour might have on others. For example at school, I would come back several times (but not all times) for exams if I was not too sick because otherwise I would have had more time to study with no drawbacks, and it would be unjust to the others. I also care a lot about what people would think about me, even if it does not really seem to be the case after everything that has been said haha.

Finally, I have a strange relationship with helping others. I really would like to help, because it is the right thing to do and it is kind, but when a situation presents itself I think "ugh why me". If I turn a blind eye, I feel like a monster. If I help and fail I feel bad. If I help and succeed I feel really good and proud of myself, but these situations should not occur too many times as they make me feel anxious before, during and after. On the other end, I am very bad at comforting, and often do it badly. I don't like seeing people cry, it hurts, but otherwise I don't understand how people feel.

Well, after writing this I have the impression of being a complete paradox and not someone to speak to hahaha! I have so many things to change in order to be more pleasant to live with!

Well... sorry for the long text! And thank you for everything!

I’m leaning towards ISFJ.

I’m seeing strong Si/weak Ne. You gave several examples to show you’re much more comfortable with what’s familiar, and resistant to change. Re-reading/watching media, trouble letting go of familiar items, your mom playing movies in the background until they were familiar enough for you to enjoy - all strong examples of Si throughout your whole life. Also, your first example of familiar media still giving you inspiration/fantasies is a great example of Si/Ne working together.

I can see young Fe in being “too kind,” and having trouble saying No to people. You don’t like imposing your needs on people, and are aware when you can’t meet someone else’s needs (“I felt bad I didn’t ask my friend enough and that is wrong.” or “If I help and fail, I feel bad.”) You show an awareness of the impact of your behavior on others, and have a sense of “social courtesy.” You gave a good example of Si/Fe in saying “I ask ‘How are you’ first out of courtesy…and then they will ask me in turn.”

Lower Ti shows through a bit in your enjoyment of proofreading and correcting mistakes, or when you said you engage “to show I have knowledge on the subject.”

#ask #type me #isfj #mbti #myer-briggs #Anonymous

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uwua3 · 5 years ago

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i stumbled across your blog and i adore your writing!! if it’s not too much to ask, can i get some fluffy cafe date hcs w/ kazu?

YES!!!!!!!!! kazunari Best Boy ever ♡_♡ but thank you so much for the support!!! i hope you’ll adore this piece as well~

summary: you’re kazunari’s greatest gift of them all this christmas

author’s note: i know it’s summer, but this is a christmas! kazunari who is spontaneous and loves the holiday spirit ♡ i miss christmas so much even though i don’t celebrate. enjoy the puns~

word count: 1,771

music: chocolady – akdong musicians (akmu)

i like you a latte!

🌻🎨 miyoshi kazunari

kazunari regretted procrastinating on his big final project of the school year before winter break

he couldn’t help it! he said he’d start soon, but scrolling through his entire timeline took hours! liking posts and making his own creative trends was basically a requirement in his career as a social media influencer!

one thing led to another, and by the time kazunari looked up from his screen, he was surrounded by supplies and only less than half a week to finish a project he got assigned two months ago

no need to panic, just got to do everything right! kazunari went pale like the snowflakes outside and groaned, already stressed as he rubbed his face. this was not going to end well at all... he would need to pull all–nighters just to pass!

kazu⭐️ posted an update! : gonna be offline for a bit~ ♪ don’t miss me too much!!! rip my procastination (^з^)-☆

just a hour after he posted his stresses to the internet, his ears perked up at the custom ring tone he set for you blaring through his room. he took the phone out of his apron pocket and put it to his ear, still mapping out his design as he tried to hide his tiredness

(he hated worrying you, he’d rather have your attention when he was at his best over his exhausted, procrastinative state)

“yolo~! what’s up?” kazunari loudly asked, affectionately calling out your pet name as you laughed on the other end. kazunari could hear you put something on and the jingle of keys. coat? keys? where were you going at this time of night? kazunari pouted, looking at his work, he wished he could go out, too!

kazunari glanced out at his window, seeing it was dark outside. he was about to ask what you were doing before he heard your door close, his facetime screen popped up as he quickly pressed accept, wanting to see your face to motivate him to make some progress

you were walking down your sidewalk in the cold, wearing clothes that were too put–together at this time of night. your cheeks and nose were red from the frost as you grinned at him with all the energy in the world

“i saw your post! i know you’re tired, come on, let’s go get coffee!” you offered, and kazunari felt all his energy come back as he immediately nodded without considering staying behind to focus on his work. he needed you, his energy boost!

“whoa~ why are you so cute?! you know i love coffee! (and you)” kazunari complimented, pushing himself up and heard the crack of his bones. his neck was sore and his clothes were already stained, but he just wanted to see you as he shoved his feet in his shoes and left the studio he was renting

nothing could get between kazunari and his much needed picker–upper (you and caffeine, of course)!

you guys didn’t even have to say which café it was, you two went to the same place as always. it was the 24/7 café that felt like it always stuck in the holiday spirit. the colorful lights were up, there was a jukebox playing christmas classics, and kazunari felt like he was home when he stepped into the warm atmostphere

(like the social butterfly he was, kazunari animatedly exclaimed his greetings and held a small–talk conversation with the exhausted barista at the register. how he remembered the barista’s name was beyond him, and the employee just tried to stay awake as he moved to the back to take a nap. kazunari shrugged, you can’t win everybody, he’ll just try again at a better time)

when kazunari saw you at your usual table by the window with his favorite order and cookies, kazunari rushed over and pulled you into a hug, giving you a big kiss like always did when he wanted to express how much he loved you but couldn’t do it in words

you two were the only ones in the café since it was so late. chocolady by akmu was over the radio this time as the guitar strum made kazunari feel his worries melt away

how could he be stressed when his partner and favorite foods were right in front of him? kazunari slid into the seat next to you, wanting to be as close as possible as he laid his head on your shoulder with a sigh

(it was rare for him to be so clingy without wanting to be the big spoon, so it was nice to have your best boy in your arms because he wanted your love & support)

he was so tired but you always let him rest, it was comforting to know you were here with him and knew coffee would fix him right away

“thank you~ you know i love you, right?” kazunari hummed, taking your hand as he sipped his coffee with the other. it was sugary sweet, just how he liked it. this time, there was peppermint to signify the upcoming holidays

“words cannot espresso how much you bean to me! we’re seriously the perfect blend~” kazunari joked, holding up his marshmallow cup like it was a toast when you two were the only one awake at this hour

you laughed again, patting his head and gently massaging his temples as kazunari cuddled into your side. you always knew how to make him feel better, you were his caffeine dose of the day but like, everyday

“i love you too, kazu. even if your coffee puns are terrible (hey! kazunari took offense), school must be hard on you if you had to go offline for a while!” you comforted him as he nodded, closing his eyes when you pressed a kiss to his forehead. he loved you so much, every act of affection felt like an energy boost even though he felt sleepy in the dim lighting

“s’ my fault anyways, i was busy online.” kazunari murmured, trying to keep his eyes open but your body was so warm. he was in his pajamas too since he didn’t change, and it felt like he was cuddling you back in bed. this was tortue! how could he stay awake when you were super adorable like this?!

kazunari blinked, pushing himself off you as he stood up to stretch, appreciating the quiet music and the stillness of the city at night. suddenly, the song faded and shifted into a christmas song he knew you loved. when you were about to mention it, kazunari placed his drink down and held his hand out with a flourish of a bow

“m’lady~ you are brew–ti–ful, where have you bean all my life?” kazunari asked as you took his hand without a doubt and let him whisk you to your feet. you giggled, trying to not be so loud as you two slow–danced in the public café. anyone walking could see you two dancing through the window, any of the employees could have walked out, but it felt like you two were the only people in the world

you rarely got to witness a tired, more mellow kazunari (even though this meant he was more prone to make insufferable puns). so when you got to see his quiet, more vulnerable side, you always enjoyed his contemplative nature and ability to make anything a special memory. he was tired, but his smile was wide as he attempted to sing along to the lyrics

(he was off–tune on purpose, but you thought you fell in love all over again at the sight of his paint–stained pj’s and his blonde hair illuminated by the warm yellow lighting)

“kazu, stop!” you tried to pull away to avoid being too public with your pda, but he whined as he held you closer, swaying back and forth

“i like dancing with you,” kazunari said, pretending to brush a lock of your hair behind your ear before he put his foot behind your heel, causing you to fall back as he held you in a dip. “do i sweep you off your feet, or do i keep you... grounded?”

kazunari winked and you couldn’t help but laugh at his spontaneous quirks, wanting to retort with something just as punny before you looked past his face and noticed something hanging from the ceiling. oh, mistletoe

without warning, you leaned forward and caught him in a kiss, surprising him to the point where he almost let you go (you would’ve absolutely pushed him out into the snow to freeze forever). but, kazunari quickly tightened his grip as he kissed you back like it was the first

(that was one of your favorite things about kazunari. how it felt like you would never get bored and how his love was new everyday)

he tasted like the mocha peppermint latte you ordered for him and the chocolate cookie he just ate. he was sweet like christmas and all things nice, like he came straight out of a gingerbread house

when you two seperated due to the very awkward cough of the underpaid employee at the front desk, you laughed with no shame as kazunari casually apologized with his instant charisma (he even addressed the barista by name, how’d he even know?)

you two took your time to leave, returning back to your seats to talk more about your plans for the holidays and what to do next before you headed out into the cold

kazunari tossed his empty cup into the trash, noticing the label written as he turned towards you, practically glowing underneath the christmas lights decorating the sidewalk

before you could even say anything, kazunari gave you a peck on the lips and smiled

“thank you, really,”

kazunari pressed another quick kiss even though your face was red (and not just from the winter air)

“i like you a latte, hot stuff! ♪”

(you definitely pushed him into the snow this time)

(you had to give him your jacket when his pajamas were all soaking wet)

because of your coffee date, kazunari always came to the café after school to get his quick dose of nostalgic memories with the same peppermint mocha latte as always

(he always posted a pic, tagging you and affectionately tagging it with every heart emoji to show he was thinking of you)

(he’d remember how amazing you looked when you danced with him, and officially deemed christmas the best holiday ever)

kazunari managed to pass his project in on time and made it to winter break! after all, how could he spend christmas with you if he failed his classes?

#miyoshi kazunari #kazunari miyoshi #a3! act! addict! actors!#a3!#act! addict! actors!#a3! actor training game #a3! headcanons #act! addict! actors! headcanons #mankai a3!#mankai company #a3! x reader #a3 x reader #kazunari x reader #a3! kazunari #a3 kazunari

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luminous-studiess · 5 years ago

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Seeing as you mentioned in one of your last posts that you’ve learnt how to study in the pas semester, I was wondering if you could share with us your tips & tricks, please? I love your blog ❤️

hi!!!!! first of all, thank you so much for the kind words. it always helps when i hear that people like my content, and it’s nice to know when people on studyblr reach out and motivate each other. i hope you’re doing well as well!i guess i have to preface this with the fact that studying in undergrad is very different from studying in law school. also, studying in different undergraduate courses constitutes very different studying styles as well. for me, i took literature, so it was a lot of writing papers and not much memory work. in law school, there was a LOT of memory work. i did really badly for several months because i wasn’t used to studying for those kinds of exams. i may make posts if anyone’s interested on how to study specifically for literature or law classes, but for now, these are general tips on how to study.this is a long-ass post, so my apologies!

HOW TO STUDY!!!!!!! A HUGE GENERAL GUIDE FROM SAM FROM LUMINOUS STUDIES, AFTER ~7 YEARS OF HOMESCHOOLING, 4 YEARS OF UNDERGRAD (AND A MAGNA CUM LAUDE) AND ONE TERRIFYING SEMESTER OF LAW SCHOOL.

FIRST THINGS FIRST: general tips, some life advice, preparation

- actual intelligence matters very little in school. some people learn faster, some take a little more time. being smart in itself does not matter when you don’t work. actual hard work can compensate for a less retentive memory (as i’ve found out over the semester). discipline and a lot of hard work always pay off, even if it seems rocky at first. make the resolve to dedicate a set amount of time to study everyday, even if it’s just an hour or so. a little is better than nothing. - my constitutional law professor (aka my favorite professor) advised one of my classmates to log her work hours. while it seems tempting to set a specific timeslot to get things done, sometimes life gets in the way, and you don’t actually get to work at 3 pm. maybe most of the time you sit at 3 pm is spent fiddling on your phone. to actually track productivity and consistency, time the hours you actively spend studying. put away all your distractions. personally, i like the forest app because it forces me to stay away from social media and lets me use the pomodoro method. on good study days, i get to log my work time in batches of 25 minutes. again, it can be the amount of hours you put in, but what matters is the quality of work you put in. stay consistent. i promise you. it helps- on the study environment: sometimes studyblr convinces you that you need a coffeeshop, an aesthetic library, a beautiful italian garden to get things done. that would be ideal, but most of us don’t have access to that. i suggest you evaluate if you work better in public spaces with a little sound ambience, to hold yourself accountable (coffeeshops, the school library, with friends), or in private, quiet spaces. once you know where you work best, know what keeps you focused. is it tea? a glass of iced coffee? a lofi playlist? a podcast? i find that process a little fun because it keeps the study process a little less dull and uncomfortable, as it often can be. don’t forget to keep it pleasant/rewarding, but note that overindulgence can distract you. trust me, i know this from experience.- study materials: are what you want and what you need. you don’t need anything fancy. personally, i need many colored pens and highlighters because i have a color-coding system for cases and provisions, but for undergrad, my best weapons were just a black ballpen and a nice mildliner. it’s preferential, and just see what works for you. - on study anxiety: i have mental health issues. i’ve been seeing a psychiatrist (and lately a therapist) for depression and anxiety, and it used to be really, really bad, to the point i couldn’t start. i think the best place to start is to find that kind of help if you really have bad mental health. but if it’s the kind of anxiety that stems from being worried that things won’t turn out well, or that there’s too much to do, it’s always best to start, and to remember that even a little, or something imperfect, is still progress. try it for 5 minutes. if you still can’t do it, rest. but sometimes we just need a little push. other things that really calm my anxiety are a good baroque playlist (check out baroque lute/jordi savali’s the celtic viol/bach’s goldberg variations on spotify!!!), jazz, or lofi, and lavender room spray. i also like to use gifs which help you with breathing techniques. you can find them all over tumblr and twitter. it’s also really helpful to ask others for help when you feel stuck. i’ve asked professors for a little consideration and classmates for advice and clarifications when i’m confused. reaching out to other people is often a great way to start the learning process.

- scheduling: i find it hard to keep on top of things, so i’m really thankful to the classmate who added me to a google calendar with all the class assignments. i think it’s a great system for knowing what the assignments are, so google calendar is your friend. for daily tasks, bullet journals help keep me accountable. i have a really simple one. quick and dirty. ACTUALLY STUDYING: methods, tricks, tips- consider the subject. different classes require different methods. some classes like math and chemistry – which, disclaimer, i have very little experience with – require practice problems. for literature classes, this requires much free analysis, annotations, research, and your own interpretations. other classes like history and geology require the memorization of topics. consider what information you need to learn, and how you want to approach it.- TAKE NOTES DURING THE LECTURE. i can’t stress this enough. if the teacher or professor mentions it, it’s probably important. nowadays, for major classes, i mark the topic on the syllabus with a special-colored highlighter that i won’t use for anything else so i know it’s crucial and will probably turn up on an exam. note: if they place special emphasis on a bit of information because it probably WILL turn up during the exam. one of my professors mentioned that a case would probably turn up during the philippine bar exam and guess what. it did. listen to the professor, don’t goof around on twitter (me to my undergraduate self, tbh), take good notes. make the notes into a reviewer during exam season. pass the class.- pre-studying helps. this is mandatory in law school, because mostly, you go to class to regurgitate what you’ve studied (or didn’t study) on your own from the syllabus. for undergrad, however, it helps to give yourself a background on the material so you can engage in the class, and take notes more efficiently. also, as much as possible, do the required reading. you’ll probably do it in one night anyway before the exam, so at least spread your work out and do a reasonable amount weekly.- on that note: if you’re going to rush through the syllabus and do “a semester’s worth of info” in one night (yes we’ve all seen Those Memes) anyway, it will be less of a pain in the ass to actually do the work slowly and consistently every week. trust me. this comes from a procrastinator who’s getting bitten in the ass, so please learn this as early as you can. it saves you a lot of pain later on.- THE CLASS SYLLABUS IS YOUR BIBLE. it’s all there. before classes, go through it. keep it with you during class and annotate it if you have to. some of my friends like to space the syllabus out on a document file so they use the headings for note-making. the syllabus will be your friend during review season.- always learn actively. if you don’t know a word or term, it will always help to google. make notes in the margins. make flashcards so you state information and retrieve it instead of just recognizing it. form study groups. rewrite your notes. engage with what you’re learning and it becomes so much more interesting, and so much easier. - set a time to unwind religiously. breaks are so important to avoid burnout. i like friday nights for unwinding, family dinners, reading, watching series. please rest. REVIEW SEASON: HOW TO COPE. HOW TO PASS. HOW TO CRY AS LITTLE AS POSSIBLE. - exams are scary. i used to enjoy them, until law school, where i’ve been beaten up thoroughly by every exam. but strangely enough, this is where i only learned how to actually study for an exam with huge blocks of information. i realized that this method really helps for undergrad, and probably will get you honors if you stick to a similarly solid method. - study as early as you can. once you know when the exam is, make a study plan. two weeks is a good minimum. sometimes, there are professors and teachers who announce only a week before, which is unavoidable, so honestly. just make a plan. i tend to assign a set number of syllabus pages to cover/study for on each day so i have time to do a second reading/quizzing. - HOW TO REVIEW: remember the class notes? remember the syllabus? those will help you cover everything you need once you schedule. the syllabus is your map for what you need to cover. assume that everything in the syllabus is something you need to go over at least once, so assign a set number of pages/topics per day. the class notes are your guide on what to focus on. note the special topics which have been emphasized by the lecturer. it also helps if you know what parts you’re very unsure about, so you know what to work on again when you have extra time. i tend to make reviewers out of my class notes, which also helps to retain info, because i go over it again. make time to re-read and quiz yourself. - blanking out on exam day? i can honestly assure you that it’s probably because you didn’t sleep enough. you’ve studied the information, but sleep deprivation either makes you fall asleep during the exam (which has happened) or forget what you learned (which has also happened). if you’ve made the time to repeat what you’ve needed to learn, the studying isn’t the problem. i make a rule to try and avoid all-nighters when necessary because sleep is integral in helping you retain information. when i need extra time to study, i go to bed early, and wake up around 3 or 4 am to study some more. it really helps.DEALING WITH FAILURE: - my professor (a huge businessman, constitutionalist, overall a very successful person) told me that he would not get where he is now if he hadn’t failed. failure is growth because you know you’re doing something. the only true “failure” is when you stop trying. some days are hard, some days don’t yield the results even when you work hard. it’s okay. be gentle on yourself. you are still growing.- sometimes i think about the fact that “gifted child syndrome” aka burnout and perfectionism stem from how many smart kids are often praised for their intelligence and not their work ethic. so when they do badly later in life, they think it’s because they weren’t “smart enough” and give up easily. i think much of doing anything entails a lot of embarrassment, a lot of hard work, and lots of failure. it’s so hard to put up with, and it can often be depressing and unhealthy and put you in a bad place. sometimes we need to talk to someone professional, if it gets to that point. but sometimes, it also helps to realize that a little hard work will help us to get where we want to be. - ask for help. i talk to my friends, my parents, and my professors when i’m stuck. it really helps.ok, whew. i know there’s so much more about studying. but i hope this helps for now. please let me know if you guys want more specific study guides. good luck, loves! you got this.– sam

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