Tumgik
#this suits him well actually 😂
maplesyrupsainz · 1 month
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˖⁺。˚⋆˙20 weeks you say… | LN4˖⁺。˚⋆˙
pairing: lando norris x pregnant!reader y/n (she/her)
genre: social media au, established relationship
warnings: sexual references but not major, mainly fluff with some joking/play fighting yk the vibes
summary: in which your pregnancy announcement is met with an unexpected response
a/n: chose lando coz im obsessed with him atm😭😭😭 also i think this plot suits him better lol. it's pretty short but it fits the plot best imo!
request!!!: Can I request reader and driver, maybe Carlos or lando, announce her pregnancy only for fans to put together that the baby is a result of a race win
my masterlist
fc: various blonde girls from pinterest
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by landonorris, lilyzneimer, and others
yourusername we've been keeping a secret… 20 weeks and counting 🕊️
view all comments
user1 OH MY GOD
yourmother im crying again y/n!
yourusername you better stop by the time baby's here!
lilyzneimer so happy for you guys 🥹
yourusername tysm angel <3
iamrebeccad amazing news ❤️
liked by yourusername
alexandrasaintmleux congratulations ❤️
liked by yourusername
francisca.cgomes ahhh cant wait for baby to be born!
yourusername 🥹🥹🥹
user2 all the wags comments!! so cute
carlossainz55 are you sure?
yourusername 😂😂😂 yes lando is going to be a father for the 500th time
user3 hahahaha poor lando
charles_leclerc wow sending love to you both! congratulations!
liked by yourusername
oscarpiastri congratulations to my favourite couple!
yourusername thanks osc 😊
danielricciardo contrats 🎉
liked by yourusername
logansargeant wow congratulations guys
liked by yourusername
user4 20 weeks you say... 🧐
landonorris posted a story
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liked by lilymhe, francisca.cgomes, and others
user5 ahh she's so gorgeous
user6 i can't believe u guys are gonna have a baby omg 😭
user7 wowwww
user8 cant wait for baby norris 🥹
lilyzneimer you better be looking after her
landonorris i am!!!
lilyzneimer good.... im watching
landonorris scary
yourmother look after my baby!
landonorris i am!!! why does no one believe me
yourmother she's carrying precious cargo
landonorris oh dont i know it 😭
twitter ->
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messages ->
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instagram ->
landonorris
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liked by yourusername, carlossainz55, and others
landonorris anyway 🤫
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user16 r u telling us to shut up lando 🥺🥺
landonorris yes actually y/n is mad at u guys!
user17 NOOOOOOOOOOOO
user18 smh coz u guys r always running ur mouth
user19 what happened? what did u guys do this time 🤔
user20 ...worked out when their baby was conceived...
user21 HAHAHAHAHHA
user22 too far i fear
carlossainz55 me personally, i think it's funny
landonorris well...
yourusername shut up both of you
carlossainz55 sorry y/n
oscarpiastri forgive & forget 😌
user23 yup i agree with oscar! forgive us y/n
yourusername hmmm.... NO!
user24 HAHAHAHA
user25 hahahah poor y/n!
user26 it was a special race win tbf, we'd all have done the same thing y/n <3
liked by landonorris, yourusername
messages ->
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by lilyzneimer, landonorris, and others
yourusername lil update. we r so ready for baby now
view all comments
user27 omg she's so much bigger now
user28 what's the gender??
user29 they havent told us
user30 ur glowing y/n
liked by yourusername
user31 she liked this.. maybe she is forgiving us :)
lilyzneimer miss you in the garage babe
yourusername miss you so much! please come visit soon lol
lilyzneimer omg i will🥹🥹
mclaren we cant wait to meet little norris!
liked by yourusername, landonorris
iamrebeccad gorgeous girl
yourusername ily
user32 carlando & landoscar lives on in their wags friendships tbh
oscarpiastri lando is miserable without u, hurry up & have the baby & get back to races
yourusername what do u think im trying to do oscar? 🤨
oscarpiastri yea true. my bad
landonorris i dont like ur tone
oscarpiastri im so sorry
landonorris better
user33 LOL😭😭
time skip 🧡
landonorris posted a story
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liked by yoursister, lilyzneimer, and others
yoursister is everything ok?
landonorris i'll keep you updated, dont worry
yoursister you better
user34 she's sooo cute
user35 i cant wait for her to have the baby ahh
user36 giggling & kicking her feet she's jus a girl fr
lilyzneimer keep me updated please
landonorris 😂 will add you to the baby update group chat
lilyzneimer please do omg
carlossainz55 dont freak out
landonorris easy for you to say
landonorris
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liked by yourmother, oscarpiastri, and others
landonorris first month with our daughter x
view all comments
user37 OMG FINALLY NEWS
user38 a girl omg
user39 lando a girl dad!!!
user40 awwww a beautiful daughter from winning in miami
landonorris DONT BRING THIS UP AGAIN
user40 oop-my bad
user41 HAHAHAHA
user42 they deffo nickname her miami
oscarpiastri congratulations 🥂
landonorris 🧡
lilyzneimer 🥹🥹🥹🥹 so gorgeous
liked by landonorris
carlossainz55 congratulations both of you!
landonorris thanks for all ur help 🫡
carlossainz55 it's nothing :)
yourusername god i love you 🥹
landonorris i love YOU
yourusername posted a story
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liked by landonorris, mclaren, and others
user43 HAHAHAHA
user44 ur not mad at us 🥳🥳🎉🎉🎉
user55 this is sooo funny & cute omg i love her
yoursister 😭😭stop it
yourusername hahahaha it is kind of funny tho
lilyzneimer ignoring the caption, u guys are so cute
yourusername 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹
landonorris best gift i could ever ask for 😌 i love you
THE END 🧡
2K notes · View notes
landograndprix · 3 months
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•°. *࿐ 𝘣𝘪𝘳𝘥𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘧𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 ° ₗₙ⁴ - i
𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬
•°`♡ life is pretty amazing and but there's a void that, no matter what, you're not able to fill and yet the ‘solution’ is right by your side– you just need to open your eyes.
•°`♡ one jealous ex, one very love sick lando and a very annoyed friend
•°`♡ reader's nickname is giggles or gigs. Comments and reblogs are welcome ♡
𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭
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y/nusername
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liked by riabish, maxfewtrell and 97,563 others
y/nusername 'bout last week.
tagged: madmaddie, landonorris, faithiams, maxfewtrell
view all 892 comments
norry4 Maddie is such a mood 😂
y/nlando I smell a lot of new content!!
julieeeexo JASPER?!
↳ julieeeexo oh no my bad its lando lmao
haileywilliams wow, max is so cool
↳ maxfewtrell the coolest
y/nusername get off your high horse you short little man
maxfewtrell well that's just rude
landoscar 🌟 sibling core 🌟
yukisan every girl in here fighting for their lives thinking its the crappy ex who's building legos with our gigs 💀
bobnorris girl for a second I thought you were back with jasper and was about to write a whole paragraph until I saw you tagged lando 😭
↳ chilisainz fr I was about to lecture her again 💀
landoscar day 197394 of begging lando to introduce martin to y/n so they can make a song together
landosy/n and the lego dates continue 🥰
hannahh ma'am I'm in desperate need of new music
↳ maxfnorris don't think our version of tswift has been through a break-up recently 😭
hannahh our version of tswift 😭 I need gigs to fall in love again or get her heart broken for the 1000th time
pastrynorris the fact we all feel the need to tell gigs to stay away from jasper is sending me, that man really is trash 😭
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y/nusername
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liked by landonorris, pierregasly and 88,781 others
y/nusername little shits & gigs ♡
tagged: faithiams, haileywilliams, landonorris
view all 878 comments
landito just saw your story from last night, did lando get off the sim at all? 😂
↳ y/nusername take a guess bestie, men always disappoint :(
landito all men are the same fr :(
norrizz Monaco suits you girls <3
lanlan4 so we're not going to talk about that last picture? No? Cool, okay 😭
faithiams the actual love of my life ❤️
↳ landonorris love you too babes ❤️
norry4 lando 😭
faithiams wrong girl my guy 😉
yukisan last picture?!
madmaddie did he at least let you drive a couple rounds in the sim or what?
↳ landoscar this muppets going to replace me in the car this weekend, she was on fire 🔥
fewtrelllando stop it now all I can think about is lando watching gigs all proud and shit while she drives her little heart out 😭
lastlaplando last pic looking a little too much like a couple
carlandooo love how the girls got a place together for their lilttle girls trip but y/n decided to stay at lando's place instead 💀
↳ haileywilliams shocker
faithiams are we really surprised? No.
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y/nusername posted to their story
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jasjohnson replied to your story
jasjohnson
how cute
still wondering if you fucked him when we were together
jasjohnson
you don't need all that on your face, you know that right? you're prettier without it 😉
jasjohnson
I'm in Monaco as well, you wanna catch up?
hello?
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Everything taglist; @thomaslefteyebrow @hopefulinlove @smoothopz @softboystarkey @honethatty12 @cixrosie @parkersmjs @ireadthensuetheauthors @celestialams @be-your-coffee-pot @heli991113 @kodzuvk @reality-is-a-con @80sloverry @bibissparkles @myescapefromthislife @lanando4 @elliegrey2803 @ravisinghs-wife @harrysdimple05 @minkyungseokie @pretty-little-bunny382728 @thatgirlthatreadswattpad @severewobblerlightdragon @cherry-piee @namgification @mycenterfold @devineendevers @celestialend @jsjcue @d3kstar @themislovesf1 @geehsf @mehrmonga @gentlemonsterworld @destinyg237
Lando taglist: @beatricemiruna @simp-for-fictional-people @landossainz @christianpulisic10 @bored-brunette2 @i83andrew @mcmuppet @justdreamersdream @alltoomaples @jule239
bird of a feather taglist:
2K notes · View notes
redbullgirly · 8 months
Text
Million Dollar Man [LS18 smau]
Lance Stroll x reader [social media au]
Masterlist
Summary: Lance's girlfriend isn't afraid to show how much her boyfriend loves and spoils her. Unfortunately, "fans" seem to think she's a gold digger. But who would Lance and Y/N bee if they just let it slide?
Warnings: A lot of hate towards the reader by online trolls and just toxic fans, at the end she and Lance shuts them up but if you're not in the right head-space to read this, then please don't.
yourusername posted on instagram
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liked by lance_stroll, fernandoalo_oficial, astonmartin and 192,344 others
tagged: astonmartin and lance_stroll
yourusername life lately... how about you? 🍰💐
view all 3209 comments
user1 more like: life lately 💸💸💸
user2 LOL
lance_stroll life lately has been great ❤️
liked by the author
user3 Lance don't worry we're going to save you!!
user4 our guy is lyinggggg i can feel it
user5 Oh my god let them live a happy life you trolls🤦‍♀️
user6 how can you know it's happy when she clearly uses him for money?🤨
user5 And how can you know it's not? Besides I don't think she uses him for anything🤷‍♀️
user4 then your just as naive as him user5 lol
user7 she's so classy a love it!😻
user8 Can she even drive or she just wanted to take a photo in his car?
fernandoalo_oficial You are slaying Queen!😉
fernandoalo_oficial Did I do it correctly yourusername?
yourusername it's great nando, just please never use that emoji again and you'll be ready do graduate from my gen-z university!
fernandoalo_oficial Damn it I knew all you use these days is this one: 💀
yourusername 💀
user9 OKAY I DON'T CARE ABOUT ANYTHING ANYONE SAYS ABOUT HER AND LANCE CAUSE I LOVE Y/N AND NANDO INTERACTIONS MORE THAN MY OWN LIFE!!
user10 i'm convinced she holds both aston drivers hostage in her basement and is forcing them to comment on her posts
user11 It's probably not even her own basement but Lance's😭
user12 nah she ain't even that pretty
user13 omg no way this post is the way I found out lance mf stroll has a girlfriend?🤠
user14 GIRL you have so much lore to catch up on
user15 Yeah welcome to the worst wag ever fandom xd
user13 wait I'm so confused... why do we hate her???
user14 bc she's basically a gold digger, like from the moment her and lance started dating she's been posting only about shopping and showing off herself and her bf's money
user12 plus she ugly af
user15 Yeah and there are rumors on twitter about her being really mean to everyone and that the whole paddock hates her and stuff...
user13 okay I get that but tbh we can't believe everything that's on f1 twitter
user14 idc she's a bitch even without the rumors
user15 I can tell Y/N is trying so hard to have the rich girly aesthetic... it's actually embarrassing😂
astonmartin Wow you have a great car right there😍
user16 more like her sugar daddy lance has it lol XD
user17 guys be fr if you had a rich boy you'd be spending his money too!!!
twitter
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yourusername and lance_stroll posted on instagram stories
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yourusername posted on instagram
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liked by estabanocon, lance_stroll, astonmartinf1 and 206,948 others
tagged: astonmartinf1 and lance_stroll
yourusername thank you spa for having me! what a race, congrats to my favourite driver lance_stroll on p9 & his teammate fernandoalo_oficial on p5! great team work, hope to see you on another grand prix in the future astonmartinf1 💚🏆
view all 4022 comments
astonmartinf1 we hope to see you on another grand prix as well Y/N!🤩
liked by the author
user1 you don't have to lie admin, it's waste of money on her... better give the paddock pass to someone else
astonmartinf1 well, we definitely won't give it to you user1, so no need to worry about it 😙
user2 daaaamn, the admin is coming for y'all haters
user3 Of course she had to wear the racing suit... c'mon that's so embarrassing🙄
user4 actually it's pretty normal, I'm pretty sure Max's gf also wore his racing suit at some point
user3 Yeah but I at least like and respect Kelly... Y/N is a horrible gold digger
user4 well then I'm pretty sure it's your problem, not hers🤷‍♀️
user5 girl stop pretending you care about racing we all know you do it just for pr and cash xdd
user6 Honestly I'm not a Lance Stroll fan, but he deserves someone better than her...
lance_stroll Thank you to my favourite wag! 🥳❤️
yourusername love you baby!!!💞
user7 favourite wag😂 good joke😂😂
user8 am I the only one who finds their interaction cute??
user9 yeah you are user8... like just look at it, it's so forced... wouldn't be surprising if their whole relationship was fake
user10 You can hate on her all you want, but she's actually gorgeous in the third pic😻
user11 YUUUCCKK🤮🤮🤮
user12 you see I would be fine with this post if she didn't have to show off the aston martin car again!!!
user13 Hey did you notice she tagged Nando in the caption and he didn't reply to her? I call it ✨karma✨ lol
user14 maybe he escaped from her basement😭
user15 💚💚
user16 sorry but I can't help it. There's just something fishy about Y/N and I can't bring myself to like her at all
user17 Guys who is this girl and why does she get more hate in her comments than hailey bieber??💀
user18 I hate how she makes the whole Grand Prix about herself
user19 no but fr... like honey, idc about you and your favourite driveeer
user20 Tf?? She literally called LANCE her favourite driver how is that about her... you haters are so dumb🤦‍♀️
user21 I bet she read the comments on twitter about how she's bad gf for not going to any races and decided to fix her image by this XD
user19 lmfao didn't probably work the way she hoped
messages between Y/N and Lance
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lance_stroll posted on instagram
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liked by yourusername, sebastianvettel, f1 and 330,219 others
tagged: yourusername
lance_stroll As some of you now, I am not very active on social media. Today I'm making an exception for Y/N, my lovely girlfriend I've been dating for almost a year now. She is one of the greatest, most kind, caring and selfless people I know. I don't know where the idea of our relationship being unhappy, one-sided or even insincere came from, but I would like to make it very clear once and for all that these assumptions are as far from the truth as they can be.
In my life, I experienced a lot of hateful comments and reactions myself. It is not something I wish anyone should have to go through and it's disgusting. I love Y/N with all my heart and I hope that one day, she'll make me the happiest man alive and allows me to marry her, build a family together. No one will ever again speak about her in an inappropriate way, or they'll be blocked and possibly face legal actions taken agains them. I am very serious about this.
Y/N, I'm not afraid to call you the love of my life. I never want to see you cry because of some meaningless hater. Love you to the moon and back, sweetheart ❤️
view all 4823 comments
user1 It's just so heartbreaking how Lance himself had to go through so many waves of hate because of his dad and now he had to watch Y/N go through it too...😓
yourusername love you to the moon and back too lance!!!💖
lance_stroll Wouldn't have it any other way honey!😌
user2 you know it's serious when sebastianvettel shows up
astonmartinf1 once the it couple, always the it couple!💚 proud to say we were never a hater😘
user3 i still think it's fake
fernandoalo_oficial and I think you are fake🤪
user4 LMAO nando come and get the haters lets goooo
user5 That's how you shut them up xd
fernandoalo_oficial how do you children say it? I AM LANCEY/N DEFENDER
user4 yeah yeah nando exactly that or you can say your a lancey/n truther
liked by fernandoalo_oficial
user5 omg I can't believe I just had online conversation with THE Fernando Alonso😭
user4 GIRL ME TOO AND HE EVEN LIKED MY COMMENT😭😭
f1 What a beautiful couple you are!🙌 Hope to see you in the paddock after summer break!😏
user6 "they'll be blocked and possibly face legal actions taken agains them" daaammmnn man is standing on business here
user7 Tbh I never understood why y'all hated on her sm she's literally so beautiful and seems kind as well🤷‍♀️
lilymhe pretty giiiirl
lance_stroll I couldn't agree more!❤️
yourusername oh stop you two I'm blushing
user8 Can we take a moment to appreciate how beautifully the caption is written?🥹 Lance really has some poetic talent!
liked by yourusername
user9 aaah she's still a gold digger and he's too blind to see it😂
user10 Yeah she probably charmed him in bed or sm
user11 Ohh user9 and user10... I wonder how it feels to know Lance and probably some other drivers hate you🫢
chloestroll My brother and my future sister-in-law!🥰
liked by the author and yourusername
yourusername 🥰🥰
user12 im actually so happy to see y/n replying to some of the comments and just being active without so much hate on her now!!!
yourusername posted on instagram
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liked by lance_stroll, kellypiquet, fernandoalo_oficial and 299,102 others
tagged: lance_stroll and dior
yourusername they say if he wanted to he would... I say he wants to so he does 🌹❤️
comments have been limited
lilymhe she ate you jealous people up with that caption
liked by lance_stroll and fernandoalo_oficial
lilymhe also alex_albon me when??
dior Wow!❤️‍🔥
lance_stroll That's what real men do instead of trolling others on the internet.
yourusername daaammn baby
lance_stroll What? I'm just stating facts 😌
kellypiquet shopping trip to Paris when?😍
yourusername anytime you want!!!💕
astonmartinf1 So lucky to (basically) have you on our team💚
fernandoalo_oficial I call that a slay admin
astonmartinf1 ...should I tell him slay is kinda out dated??
yourusername aaah let him have his moment
fernandoalo_oficial WHAT?! YOU TRAITORS I THOUGH I WAS GEN-Z APPROVED
yourusername 🫢
THE END
Author's note: I hope you liked my first ever social media au story! I'll be glad for every feedback, comment, like, reblog and everything! You can definitely send me asks and requests for another smau's and even 'normal' fanfictions. Have a great day!
2K notes · View notes
risestarkissomega · 2 months
Note
If Donnie was in an 80s Music Video what outfit do you think he would wear? Also, how would he dress his brothers? Just asking for a friend.......
Oooo! Great question!!! 💜 The 80's is so choice! I love it!
Let's start with his brothers.
We already have a fantastic example of how he would dress Raphie, as it was already done in show.
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That white suit? Totally 80's inspired. 😎
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Actually, it's almost 1 to 1 with the main cop in Miami Vice....
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As for his other brothers, hmmm...
Mikey seems to have a propensity for 80's hip-hop jackets and tracksuits, so I feel like Don would put him in one as well.
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(Run-D.M.C. circa 1985)
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Yeah, I definitely feel like Donbon would play with these themes and Mikey's eclectic use of color.
As for Leo...
I feel like Leo would dress HIMSELF in something like this, almost verbatim:
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(Thanks. I hate it. 🙂)
But, I think Don would embrace Leo's tackiness and put him in some good ol' bright-colored parachute pants! Leo's fit (as styled by Don) would be similar to the ones below, but in a color palette that played well with Leo's markings/skin tone:
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As for himself, there's one 80's trend that I think Donnie is already known for...and that is shoulder pads.
Specifically, shoulder pads in a power suit.
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(As quoted from Google)
Looks familiar?
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Or the even more exaggerated:
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Therefore, I feel like Donnie boy would dress himself in something like this (in his color, obviously! 💜):
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Add a fetching shirt, and a bombastic tie, and yeah I can totally see Donatello in this any day! 🤩
...
Or maybe I'm wrong and he'd just put everybody in matching windbreaker tracksuits. 💀
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He's unhinged and these boys are wild, so that's totally a possibility. 😂
💜💜💜
○○○○ 💜 RiseStarKiss Studios on Youtube | My Kofi Tip Jar 💜
390 notes · View notes
boiohboii · 1 year
Text
Vigilante Shit 《pt.1》
(max verstappen x ricciardo!reader)
Yn Ricciardo is a familiar face for every formula 1 fan, having known her since she was 10 years old as she joined her brother in the paddock over the years, she leads quite a normal life as a normal college student with her boyfriend.. well, as normal as it can be
or
in which yn ricciardo gets through her first heartbreak by the help of her brother's teammate?
N.B: the summary isn't the best tbh... this small series (i think 4 or 5 parts maximum) is inspired by taylor swift's reputation and midnight albums (2 of my all time favourite albums)... I hope you guys like it! Also I left a hidden message for where this is going in here, so let me know your theories in the comments, thank you for reading ♥️♥️ °ps: don't worry, pt2 of the cillian x fem driver reader is coming very soon° WARNINGS: very short, not proof read, swear words, smoking and drinking (mentioned and in pics), 5 year age gap, if I missed anything else please let me know
faceclaim: jenna ortega
masterlist
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Liked by jakesven, danielricandynric, ynswife and 89,618 others
DannyRicUpdates: YN Ricciardo gone wild?? The 20 year old was seen tody smoking and drinking right before the Italian GP (not really a hot look, the youngest riccardo looks sick and tired). yn is known as quite the lovely and good girl, her older brother always supports her and takes her travelling whenever her studies allow while she has a lovely boyfriend back home who is always waiting for her with open arms(as documented through hers and Daniel's social media) so what could possibly push her to waste her life away?
ynric: this is ridiculous, first of i am 20 I can drink in Europe and second it's non of your fucking business you dickheads
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Liked by danielricciardo, landonorris, maxverstappen1 and 183,627 others
ynric: Tous les mêmes, tous les mêmes, tous les mêmes
username: the only 20 year old that looks like an actual 20 year old
username: now hold up, the first picture of her and jake was captioned with not all men... now she has this caption after 3 weeks of no jake
username: you might be onto something
username: I see where this is going and I don't like it
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Liked by Dannyandyn, mickschumacher, danielricciardo and 126,819 others
ynric: I regret you all the time
username: soooo, jake fucked up huh...
username: tous les mêmes indeed
username: fucking hell man
username: no cause y'all remember that video where yn and jake answered some questions and he said that he doesn't think she'd look good in short hair and that he thinks dark colors and black doesn't suite her
username: thank fuck they broke up, like sure I hate that she had to get hurt but she can only go up from here
~liked by danielricciardo~
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Liked by danielricciardo, Charles_Leclerc, ynric and 1,927,048 others
maxverstappen1: I like it 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️
username: max listening to Taylor swift was not on my 2023 bingo card wtf
username: no cause why did he choose the one song that had shit in the title
username: no cause yn having the caption from would've, could've, should've and now max suddenly listens to a song from the same album
username: coincidence? I THINK THE FUCK NOT
username: not him having the song on repeat 😂😂
part 2
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janearts · 1 year
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I couldn't help myself from referencing Highlander. There can be only one [wielder of the Netherstones]!
Proper answer (and some character analysis for Roisia) under the read-more.
Roisia was surprised by Gortash, but pleasantly so. In the first place, as far as Roisia is concerned, Ketheric and Orin recall their respective gods in their appearance: Ketheric is withered, a husk of a person, but indomitable, and Orin... well, Orin looks like a flayed corpse with meat-suit clothes, but close enough. Roisia would have expected Bane's Chosen to be more... physically domineering. Terrifying. Intractable. ...Loud? Instead, here's this charming handsome fellow who is really rather ordinary. If Roisia met him on the street, he'd just be another debonair noble lusting for power. (Join the feckin' queue!)
And neither does Gortash behave as Roisia would have expected Bane's Chosen to behave. She would have expected a Banite to be a tyrant, a Faerûnian-version of the Machiavellian prince, who instils a terror of himself and who rules through fear. Instead, Gortash gently curates among the populace not a fear of him, but a xenophobic fear of The Outsider (whether that outsider is a cult like the Absolute or a group of people like the Coast's refugees).
Roisia—by all accounts an oppositional force to his own—encounters a man who is genuinely, fully, confidently willing to partner with her to achieve a common goal and is willing to swear a divine oath to secure that partnership...
Poor man. What a fool.
You see, Roisia is something of a Machiavellian prince. She would despise to think of herself in that way were she to read Il Principe, but she has within herself some (but not all!) of the traits and qualities that are described within. She is frequently a mirror: where she meets evil, she wields evil with aplomb. ("You desire me to kiss your foot? I think not. You shall kiss mine.") She would very much prefer to offer mercy, but if her mercy is rejected—like when Ketheric imprisons Dame Aylin once again before yeeting himself into the primordial soup—then she will dole out cruelty in equal measure. Most importantly of all, Roisia is a liar and a deceiver, all while appearing compassionate, guileless, and true to her word. Roisia only really keeps her word when it suits her purposes. Were she otherwise, she would have found that Gortash would have been faithful to his word to the last. But as the Machiavellian prince, she betrays and slays him.
Actually, having written all that, Roisia is more of an embodiment of the Machiavellian prince than I originally thought: she is virtuous and good, sure, but she is also intimately familiar with baser behaviours (lying, cruelty, conspiracy, etc.) and wields those base behaviours like a tool when and where she feels it is needed and necessary.
Which is why I was absolutely thrilled when I had her do what was only natural to her and had her speak to Gortash post-mortem. Roisia is a character who believes herself to be godless: damned and/or abandoned by Kelemvor, Lord of the Dead and Judge of the Damned, for being a Necromancer. She had a sliver of hope that she would find favour with Myrkul, but Myrkul thought only of the Chosen stolen from him. She thought, perhaps, that she might find favour with Bhaal because, let's face it, she had slaughtered and bloodied so many in her long journey to Baldur's Gate, but the skull only wept blood and that was that. Bane, however, actually speaks to her, acknowledges her, validates her. She won his favour the moment she betrayed and slayed Gortash. She is in her very nature a stellar Banite. Incredible! And absolutely absurd. Thank you to Larian for programming that opportunity in. 😂
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meanbossart · 4 months
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Ask compilation: I'm Starting To Think That This Drow Guy Is Kind Of An Asshole Edition.
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Probably a Ranger in the hunter subclass. I actually intended to multi-class him as fighter/ranger at some point and make that his official class, but I haven't had time/quite figured out the best build that would still suit him - Ranger makes a LOT of sense with his backstory, arguably more than fighter, but he's still supposed to be a magic-less brick-house with 19 strength who hasn't handled a bow and arrow in 10 years, so I'm not sure where that leaves us LOL
A lot of people have suggested that Berserk Barbarian would fit him well, but I think that implies a lot of other characteristics that do NOT suit him at all so 🤷
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HE DIDN'T EVEN GO TO THE CRECHE, and honestly it made the game feel much more immersive to pick one path and stick to it like Halsin suggested, even if I did have to endure the shadow cursed lands without the shiny mace 😂
Probably for the best, it'd be a real shame if the story ended there just because he didn't like Vlaakith's attitude.
But yeah Lae'zel (who, for the record, I adore) never stood a chance in his playthrough. Sorry baby girl.
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I'm either uninformed or we have different definitions of what constitutes a crush, but sure I'll play in this space LOL
He's both jealous but also kind of aloof when it comes to things like that. It's yet another symptom of his arrogance, where it seems unfathomable that anyone who has him would be genuinely tempted by someone else. He doesn't mind a normal amount of glance-stealing and flattery, even playful flirting to a degree, but if there's persistence or if his partner seems to seek another person out for things he thinks he should be providing, he feels threatened.
Also, he has a difficult time discerning that "deep emotional connection" does not equal "romantic interest". So, at least immediately after the events of the game, he's more likely to be made insecure by his partners forming deep bonds with others than any throwaway expression of physical desire or fleeting infatuation.
[MORE UNDER THE CUT]
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Let me preface this with the (hopefully unnecessary) disclaimer that this murderous dark-elf's opinions are not my own, and that I very much purposefully made a bit of an asshole character because I find that entertaining.
And now that you're hopefully primed for what's coming - DU drow is pretty damn judgemental of people's looks save for the rare times when they give him a good impression right off the bat. He notes people's appearances and makes preemptive assumptions about them without even realizing it. He definitely does not equal beauty to value or prowess (in fact he will very much still mock of you if you seem too concerned with your appearance) but he does prescribe things based on looks.
I don't think he'd take issue with what you're describing, It sounds like a pretty average body, but he would assume that person is weaker and less fit to "keep up with him", basically. Which kind of diminishes interest.
As far as to what he finds immediately attractive, he definitely prefers people who seem physically fit (not more than himself though - gods forbid). But, the caveat to this whole tangent is that once you get past initial impressions, he could definitely come to be sexually attracted to pretty much any type of body attached to the person he's in love with.
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Thank you! There was no main event, just the building up of resentment over time and the opportunity she saw opening up when the Chosen's plan came into motion. She definitely didn't always hate him though, they had a fairly close relationship until his obsessive behavior and arrogance became an issue.
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Thank you!!!
They call him the/that drow, dark elf, or "big drow" if there's more than one present. In private they might facetiously call him Bhaalspawn if they get tired of referring to him by race.
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I'll be honest, I forgot whether or not I found it in his playthrough LOL but if he did stumble across that would be VERY funny. He'd be like "look at these idiots and their fake murder god. What kind of dimwit would worship carnage as a religion. Hey Shadowheart get a load of this-"
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HAPPY YOU ENJOY HIM! I think his unique situation overall with having been such a overwhelmingly horrid person and forgetting all about it is my favorite bit. That's kind of vague, I know, but I often think of dreams I've had where I committed a crime or did something horrible, and that immediate feeling of relief and disconnect that follows immediately after waking up. That's kind of what I imagine it's like for him - he knows of the things he did, but he doesn't really. In theory it's all true but that's a truth far too fantastical for anyone to conceptualize even if it's put right in front of your face.
That, tackling the guilt (or lack thereof) of something you genuinely don't feel like you've done and the intricacies of it, that's a fascinating state of mind to explore. I love how many directions you can take that.
For me, having a character who is not good, but is not necessarily pure unadulterated evil, makes for a lot of complex thought experiments and contradictory values. DU drow has a lot of those - things he believes and abides by absolutely except for this specific instance, being contradictory is a pillar of his character and it can be a little challenging to keep up with it - but I'd be lying if I said I don't deeply enjoy that aspect as well all the same.
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THANK YOUUUU It took me so long to figure out how to draw Astarion in a way I liked, I'm so relieved that others enjoy it too 😂
Shockingly he did succeed it and was immediately put-off by it, lmao. They wouldn't really develop much of a relationship for a while after that, so at that point DU drow just figured he was trying to get something from him and wrote him off, much as he did with everyone else with the exception of Shadowheart.
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He didn't meet her at the Tiefling grove! I didn't even know you could meet her before-hand for the longest time. But he did super, duper kill her at camp of course.
He managed to hide the body and everyone else was none the wiser, huge blood bhaal-sigil on the ground aside lmao. He was a little shocked but didn't feel all that bad about it, kind of resigning to that primal feeling of satisfaction at a job-well-done that overwhelmed him instead. He decided she was too weak to survive out there and he had just spared her the trouble.
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slexenskee · 7 months
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Detour (MDNSY Oneshot)
For an ask about the reactions of the JJK cast on MDNSY Gojo's... everything 😂
Scrubstan22 finds himself in the (un)enviable position of explaining Ru-kun to the JJK cast
(Link here: or read below)
Nanabi Shun, better known by his online handle ‘Scrubstan22’ is having his most surreal day yet. An unhinged mad scientist turned villain with a space-time quirk and an obsession with Ru-kun that borders on the same level as even the most delusional of Scrubs, has accidentally flung him, an innocent bystander, into an alternate dimension. 
This would be terrifying, if it wasn’t apparently some kind of alternate dimension where Ru-kun’s anime is real. 
And not only is it real… it’s apparently Ru-kun’s true origin story?? 
To be fair, it’s still terrifying, but Scrubstan22 has more pressing matters to focus on than his own mortality and possible impending doom. 
Gojo Satoru apparently exists in this world— but Ru-kun does not. 
It’s utterly absurd! It’s unreasonable and unfair! Maybe those songs really do already exist in this world— as the very unamused talking Panda keeps trying to tell him— but if No Scrubs and Ru-kun aren’t performing it, then they don’t actually exist at all! Nanabi couldn’t possibly put into words how life-changing it was to see Ru-kun perform in person. The fact that he doesn’t exist in this world— or at least not as the shit-posting global celebrity rockstar that Nanabi knows him as— is really quite sad. These poor kids don’t know what they’re missing out on. As a major Scrub and Ru-kun simp, Nanabi just can’t let this slide. He has to rectify it immediately. 
Luckily he has a perfect solution.
His entire downloaded archive of all things No Scrubs and Ru-kun.
Some of Gojo Satoru’s students are more impressed than others. 
“I hate that he looks so good in that skirt,” comes from the glasses-wearing girl. Maki, he thinks is her name. He only watched through the anime once so he’s pretty bad with the names of all the side characters.  
“I should have known he’d make an excellent Sailor Moon after he stole my uniform.” Kugisaki Nobara complains, looking exactly as her character does in the anime. 
Neither of them are enthused to see Ru-kun in his crossdressing glory, but Nanabi notices they’re unwillingly enthralled nonetheless. 
Itadori Yuuji himself— the main character of Cursed Fight Season One— is unsurprisingly the most enthusiastic about it all. He nearly climbs over Nanabi for a better look at the recording on his phone, eyes alight. 
“Sensei is so cool as a rockstar! It really suits him well!” Itadori exclaims, delighted. “And he’s singing ‘My Chemical Romance’? Sensei has such good taste!”
“He’s just an emo-punk loser who clearly had way too much time on his hands,” Fushiguro Megumi protests, although despite his inflammatory remarks he too doesn’t look away from the screen. 
Apparently quite a few No Scrubs’ songs are from this band ‘My Chemical Romance’. Yuuji even shows him the music video of the same song from the actual band just to prove it, although that was wholly unnecessary. Nanabi believes him when he says all these songs already exist in this world and belong to other bands— he just doesn’t care. If anything, seeing the other bands perform it just confirms what he already believed; Ru-kun does it better. 
Nanabi is happy to show them all the fan recordings he has of No Scrubs, gushing over the various outfit choices and the songs themselves. It’s actually kind of nice that these songs exist already, because that means these kids already know them and he can argue about which are superior without having to explain. Itadori’s favorite is ‘A Loaded God Complex’, called ‘Sugar We’re Goin’ Down’ in this world (although Itadori admits the changed title suits Ru-kun far more), Fushiguro’s is ‘Island in the Sun’, and Panda translates that Inumaki’s is ‘Thanks for the Memories’, but Panda himself confesses he’s unfamiliar with this genre of music. The two girls decry all their picks as boring, and don’t seem particularly impressed by any of Ru-kun’s songs until—
“Paramore!!” The two girls screech in unison, suddenly looking a lot more invested than they had earlier. 
Nanabi has up a recording from the Scrubs Unite tour, which Ru-kun had done entirely in drag. They’d finally gotten to the encore, where Ru-kun had tried to weasel his female bandmates into singing the encore song, insisting it was made for a female vocalist. They summarily denied him, so he ended up singing the song himself, called Misery Business. It’s one of Nanbi’s favorite performances, and one Ru-kun hasn’t done since. 
Even Maki and Kugisaki are begrudgingly impressed. 
“He sounds like a male Hayley Williams— that’s so fucking unfair,” Kugisaki denounces, despairing. “Why does that bastard have to be good at everything, seriously.” 
“The outfit is pretty spot on too, if he just dyed his hair, it’d be a great cosplay.” Maki agrees, sourly. 
“Does he play anything else from Riot?” Kugsaki rounds on him. “What about That’s What You Get?”
Nanabi looks up at her helplessly. “Sorry, I don’t think so. But they apparently have a ton of unreleased stuff though, so maybe I just haven’t heard it.”
Apparently back when No Scrubs was truly an underground band playing random shows at dive bars, they had an insanely large setlist. Most of those songs never made it onto any of the official recordings. He’s heard rumors online that there’s a vinyl floating around, but aside from a single interview with All Might, has no real confirmation of its existence. 
“I think it’s awesome that Sensei has an alternate personality as a rockstar,” Yuuji enthuses, looking rather fond and indulgent as he stares down at Ru-kun strutting across a stage. “I hope it’s more relaxing than being The Strongest all the time.”
Nanabi blinks at him. “Oh. He’s that too.” 
The Jujutsu Tech students stare at him blankly. “... What?” 
//
As it turns out, they’re all collectively more confused and bewildered by the whole Sixwings thing than they are the ‘world’s strongest’ thing. In this world, since the moment of his birth Gojo Satoru was always meant to be the strongest. That he can destroy armies in the blink of an eye and pull out purple-laser-death-beams-of-doom (apparently a technique called Hollow Purple in this world) and walk through explosions unscathed is just common knowledge among the Jujutsu World. 
So all of his footage of Dabi’s many international exploits was met with a genial disinterest. 
His media folder of Sixwings, however…
“He’s… really in a relationship?” Kugisaki looks utterly confounded. “A normal, healthy, longterm relationship?”
“He’s getting married?” Maki sounds bewildered.
“He has a kid?” Fushiguro sounds unimpressed. 
Panda scratches his chin. “Huh. Hey, that’s good for him! He sounds like he’s actually a well-adjusted and normal guy.” 
“Is his boyfriend a psychopath?” Kugisaki asks, urgently. “I really can’t see how else this would work out.”
“Not at all! Hawks is well-known as a very charming and friendly hero. He’s actually a really good guy.” Nanabi protests. 
Kugisaki squints at him. “How the hell does he put up with him then?”
Nanabi smiles sheepishly. “Uh… he’s pretty easygoing I guess?” 
Maki is leaning over him for a better look at his phone, using her fingers to zoom in on the photo he has up of Hawks and Ru-kun at the U.A. School Festival. He doesn’t swing that way, but even he has to admit they looked really good that day. And with Eri thrown in on top of it? It’s no wonder they’re regularly voted as the cutest couple in Japan.
“Damn. They actually look really good together.” Maki says, begrudging. 
“Tuna, tuna.” Inumaki pokes Panda in the side.
Panda gives a solemn nod. “Inumaki-kun has a good point. What’s all this gossip about a Sixwings baby?”
“Oh, that’s Eri-chan.” Nanabi scrolls down to a better photo of her. There’s one from the Ru-kun signing event at Tower Records, where a sinfully good-looking Ru-kun is holding her on his hip and waving out to the crowds. “She’s the child he birthed from his own body.”
Fushiguro blinks rapidly. “He what now?”
“He’s fucking with you.” Kugisaki denies immediately. 
Nanabi shrugs. “Maybe— but no one knows for sure! To be honest, none of his powers make much sense to us, so some people believe it and others don’t.”
Maki’s expression turns worried. “Well, they’re not all that clear to us either… I mean, there’s a lot you can do with cursed energy…”
She glances up at Panda. Panda just gives her a thumbs up. “That’s right! I mean, I exist, so who knows!”
“There’s a couple different rumors about it, but none are confirmed.” Nanabi fills them in with a gleeful expression. “The main one is that she really is the Sixwings baby, and they had her when they were teenagers and kept it a secret. There’s also a couple variations where Eri is his child, but the regular way, but he’s slept with a lot of people and none of them were women so people are pretty skeptical about it. Then there’s also the theory that he did birth her from his own body, but not with Hawks. There’s no real guesses on who her father is for that one.”
His companions look at him with varying degrees of incredulity. Nanabi spreads his hands. “The likely answer is he’s just messing with everyone and she’s adopted, but like I said, we really don’t know!”
Itadori doesn’t really seem to care about the truth either way, grabbing at his phone to scroll through the photos. “They’re so cute together! Haha, she really kind of even does look like sensei a little bit! She’s definitely just as stylish as he is!”
Itadori keeps scrolling until he gets to the infamous Swing incident, saved in all its glory in an endless gif format. 
They all stare in silence as, on screen, Gojo Satoru gets KO’d by his kid on a swing set over and over again. 
“Send me that.” Kugisaki demands. 
//
Scrubstan22 gets rescued eventually. It’s a pretty boring affair, truth be told. He didn’t see any real curses, or any kind of fighting. 
Gojo doesn’t return to campus until long after the sun has set, to the bizarre scene of all his students shoving their phones at poor Nanami, who looks as if he regretted ever coming in person to turn in his paperwork. They’re apparently trying to show Nanami photos of Gojo in drag, despite his vocal protests. The moment they lay eyes on him they pounce on him instead. None of their explanations make any sense. There’s something about him being a rockstar, and also married, and apparently a mother, and they have plenty of blurry photo evidence they try to shove at him. It looks like they all took photos of someone else’s screenshots, so the quality leaves much to be desired. Maybe if he squints really hard, that does kind of look like him in a mini skirt, but who’s to say really? 
Unfortunately for the students, the space-time continuum rights itself overnight and they all lose their collective memory of Scrubstan22 and his alternate-universe. But the digital evidence remains, and occasionally Kugisaki will pull out her phone and watch a very random gif of Gojo-sensei getting smacked to the ground by a kid on a swing, and while she has no idea where it came from, she draws immense satisfaction from it anyway. 
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cuubism · 8 months
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Rock Paper Scissors
Dreamling | Pre-Slash | 5.7k | AO3
Dream suddenly gripped the lapels of Hob's jacket with a startling fervor, arms stretched across the tabletop. His gaze bore into Hob's. "I beg, allow me to represent you instead." "Now what kind of man would I be if I let others fight my battles?" Hob said, prying his fingers off before his endless grip tore through the fabric. "Hard as it may be to believe, I'm actually not a bad hand at chess. Don't worry about me." "I do not find that hard to believe. However, as I have said, this is not chess. It is an intimate and punishing battle of minds." "Alright, so it's like Go Fish."
Hob gets challenged to a duel. Too bad his opponent has it out for Dream, and has no intention of playing fair.
--
the first fic I ever started writing for Dreamling a year and a half ago, then forgot about! 😂 then randomly decided to finish.
--
“ROBERT GADLING,” yelled an individual Hob had never met before in his life, “I hereby challenge you to a duel!”
Hob squinted at him. Said individual was standing across the darkened street, dressed strangely in a white tunic flecked with gold. Then again, Hob’s barometer for strange was a bit different than what was normal, so who was he to say, really.
“What?” he said.
Suddenly this person was much closer to him. Hob flinched back, but couldn’t move much, close as he was to the pub door. “We have business,” hissed his pale-suited challenger. It was a masculine figure, blond hair swished to one side, eyes like fire. 
Hob wasn’t impressed. He’d seen worse. Better, too.
“Listen, mate,” he said, “I don’t really have time for this. I’ve already got something on the books tonight. Come back tomorrow.”
He started to walk through the doorway, but the… creature?—he didn’t think it was human—grabbed his arm and pulled him back. “We have business,” it repeated.
Hob tried to shake off its hand, but its grip was like hot iron. It seared through his jacket and burned his skin. 
“What business?” he snapped. “I’m certain we’ve never met before, and my memory is actually pretty good, long as it is.”
The creature smiled, more like a baring of teeth. “You have courted those who have harmed me—and my ilk.”
“Not clearing it up at all.”
There was a sound like the swishing of a thousand ghosts, and then Dream was beside him.
Dream. How strange, still, to have a name, a history—well, sort of—to put to the face he’d circled back to over and over again for all these years. The name cut his friend into sharp relief—Hob’s shadow, finally united with the being who cast it. 
Where the pale stranger burned white-hot, Dream emanated cold. Hob had always found his friend’s cold aura strangely comforting. It didn’t feel dangerous and biting like the winter wind. Instead, it was the cold of lake water when one dove deep enough, a subtle and quiet draw to the otherworldly. 
Well. Usually it didn’t feel dangerous. Right now, it felt positively hypothermic.
Dream’s presence chilled the air until the stranger was forced to yank his hand away from Hob’s arm, shaking it out with a hiss. Hob’s breath fogged the air in front of his face, never mind that it was summer.
“Phaethon,” Dream hissed on one long, cold breath. “You are not wanted here.”
Phaethon pulled himself up haughtily. “I can go as I please. Night, or no night.”
“You may test that theory if you wish.”
Phaethon faltered, just a bit, before recovering himself. “I am here only to deliver a message. I challenge you, Robert Gadling, to a duel.” His blazing eyes flickered over to Hob, then back to Dream. “I did not believe you were one to violate the old rules of challenge, Lord of Dreams.” 
He bowed slightly. It felt mocking, which rankled Hob, who’d otherwise been keeping his cool. 
“Are you going to explain what this is about?” he said, for the third time. “I don’t appreciate being accused of things I haven’t done.”
Instead of answering, Phaethon said, “I’ve uncovered your history. There’s quite a lot of it, isn’t there? I wager it could make quite a bit of trouble for you, having all of that information turned over to certain parties. Human authorities. Occultists. Vampire hunters, they’ll love you–”
“I’m not a vampire,” Hob snapped.
“Doesn’t matter. Point is, we can do that, or, you can choose to face me directly.”
“What do you seek to gain from the challenge?” demanded Dream. He seemed to know more about what was going on here than Hob, which wasn’t comforting. Hob didn’t particularly want to get drawn into some kind of immortal creature game with obscure rules he’d end up tripping over.
Phaethon’s grin emerged one tooth at a time. “I want… your dreams.”
Hob probably should have been more troubled by this. Instead, he just frowned in confusion. “Not sure that’s in your power, mate. You’re aware who you’re talking to?”
He didn’t need to gesture to Dream looming over his shoulder.
“If you agree to the terms,” said Phaethon, a hiss like lava dripping over stone, “then the magic will bind us.” 
Dream didn’t contradict him, but his anger cooled the air until Hob felt like he was standing atop a glacier.
“I think I’ll pass,” Hob told Phaethon. “Feel free to try to reveal me. I’m good at disappearing.” 
He turned to go—
“Lord Morpheus.” Phaethon turned the beam of his gaze on him, sunlight ricocheting off ice. “Will you stand in his stead?”
Hob grit his teeth and, against his better judgment, turned back around. “Don’t bring him into this. Look, if I win your challenge, what do I get in return?”
“You may request whatever you like,” said Dream. “Such are the terms of the agreement.”
“Fine. If I win, then I want this: you never speak to or of me again. That means no threatening me, no using me to threaten anyone else, no telling anyone about me—nothing. Got it?” God, Hob just wanted to go inside and have a beer.
Phaethon gave him a little bow. “Fair enough. I accept the terms of this challenge.” 
Dream seemed aggravated; a trickle of energy, like black lightning, scurried up the back of his neck and disappeared into his hair. But he didn’t intervene.
Hob and Phaethon shook on it. Then Phaethon retreated into the shadows again, calling, “Tomorrow at midnight, Robert Gadling. I will see you then.” Then his eyes blinked out and he was gone.
Hob shuddered. Good riddance. He rather preferred his eldritch creature to that one, thanks very much.
“What was that?” he said.
Dream’s presence was warming again by small degrees. The atmosphere was now more like an industrial freezer than Antarctica. “A minor demigod.”
“Oh, minor. Alright then.” 
“They are occupied by petty troubles,” said Dream.
Hob looked at him out of the corner of his eye, but elected not to comment. 
“Come on,” he said instead, leading the way back toward the pub. “We’re supposed to be having an easy night of it, dammit!” He wasn’t about to let some minor demigod ruin his night. He never knew how many of them he would get with his friend.
Dream’s gaze lingered on the spot where Phaethon had disappeared, but eventually, like the sweeping of a long coat tail, he followed.
---
"So, a duel," Hob remarked as they sat down across from each other in the pub booth. "I admit, I haven't dueled anyone in a few centuries, but I can't imagine it'll be—”
"It is not what you are thinking of," Dream interrupted. He had folded himself into the booth seat like a stick insect trying to cram itself in a jar. It was an absurd image, the long black coat, the spindly arms on the tabletop. "It is not a fight of the physical form. It is a battle of the mind and will."
"You're going to have to elaborate."
"In such a challenge—” Dream began, but was interrupted by the arrival of a waitress, there to take their order.
"So, what can I get for you chaps?" she said brightly.
The idea of Dream being a chap was so hilarious Hob had to stifle a laugh. Yeah, maybe he wasn't taking the whole duel thing seriously enough. Oh well.
Hob ordered a beer and a plate of chips. When Dream showed no sign of speaking, he ordered for him, too.
“You can order whatever you like,” Hob told him, when the waitress had gone. “It is my pub and all.”
Dream picked up the laminated menu gingerly. It wobbled in his hands. He looked down at it with a flat expression.
Hob realized belatedly that he probably didn’t know what to order. How much had pub food changed since— God, 1910 or so? And it wasn’t like his friend would have had much time to peruse menus since, what with all he’d been up to.
“Just try the chips,” Hob said, taking the menu away from him. “We’ll see how far that gets you.” 
"I have no need of human food," Dream said, folding his hands back on the table.
“Sure, and I technically don’t need my left leg, either, but I do rather like having it.”
“You say strange things,” Dream murmured. “As I was telling you. In such a challenge—” 
The waitress returned with their drinks. Dream glowered at her. Hob thanked her brightly.
"So, you were saying?" he said, sipping his beer. "In such a challenge…?"
"In such a challenge—”
The waitress arrived again with their chips. Dream slammed his hands on the table, shaking the chips in their basket and making the waitress jump. 
"Sorry," Hob apologized, "we've had a bit of a day." Wasn't it always.
"In such a challenge," Dream continued when she had gone, in a tone that suggested he would not be stopped this time, "one must suggest a mind-form, which one's opponent will attempt to surmount and defeat. Then you attempt to defeat their new form, and so on until one challenger is victorious. It is… a predictive game, of sorts. If one can predict what one's opponent’s moves might be, one can choose forms to foil them. This can easily become complicated."
"So, it's like chess," Hob summarized.
Dream stiffened, lips pressing into an offended line. "It is not so simple as chess."
"Checkers?"
"It will not help you to think of it so." Dream took a chip and bit into it in irritation. "You just— oh." He stared at the chip. "These are quite pleasant."
"Can never go wrong with a good chip," said Hob, then furrowed his brows. "Haven't you had them in dreams before or something?"
"Presumably. It has been at least a century." 
Ah, yeah. That. "Well, they're frying them in veg oil instead of lard nowadays anyway. Kind of a different experience." 
Dream stared at him as if Hob made no sense whatsoever.
"Anyway," Hob continued, "am I even going to be able to create these mind-forms? I'm not exactly an otherworldly being." 
"The power is in you, though it may be more challenging to harness. And easier to let slip from your grasp. It is imagination, after all. Humans are good at imagination, though perhaps not so good at holding onto it."
"Hmm." Hob munched on a chip. "Okay. I'll work on my imagination." After seven hundred years or so of life, it was possibly a tool that needed some sharpening. 
"I admit it offends me greatly that Phaethon would presume to ask a human to fight in this way," said Dream. He suddenly gripped the lapels of Hob's jacket with a startling fervor, arms stretched across the tabletop. His gaze bore into Hob's. "I beg, allow me to represent you instead."
"Now what kind of man would I be if I let others fight my battles?" Hob said, prying his fingers off before his endless grip tore through the fabric. "Hard as it may be to believe, I'm actually not a bad hand at chess. Don't worry about me."
"I do not find that hard to believe. However, as I have said, this is not chess. It is an intimate and punishing battle of minds."
"Alright, so it's like Go Fish."
"Do not joke," Dream growled. Actually, he never truly growled. It was more like his voice dropped into a lower register than usual. Which was saying something. Hob interpreted it as a growl, though. "Do not joke when your existence is at stake. Your immortality cannot protect you from this." 
"Are you saying I'd be unmade if I lost?" Hob asked. It was a concerning thought, to say the least. It had been a long time since he'd had to concern himself with his own mortality.
Dream’s tongue ran over his lower lip. "Potentially. The terms of the fight do not state so, but I do not know how such a duel will affect a human. The strain of it may simply tear you to shreds. It nearly drained me, the last time I fought."
"Wait, you had a fight like this? Recently?"
Dream tilted his head, gaze paling in confusion. "I told you that I went to Hell to retrieve my helm." 
"Yeah, but you didn't tell me you had to mind-battle– who'd you mind-battle anyway?"
"The demon chose Lucifer Morningstar as his representative." Dream’s lip curled in distaste. "Hence, the near loss."
Hob looked at him in concern. "Are you alright, though?"
"Of course I am all right." He spoke it as two words, like the phrase had never before graced his tongue. Hob wanted to let out a long-suffering sigh, but managed to restrain himself. "I am Dream of the Endless."
"Mmhmm. Yep. Okay."
"You do not have to worry about me," Dream said stiffly, parroting Hob's words from before.
Hob thought that was evidently untrue, but decided not to mention the century of imprisonment or the multiple near-death experiences— could he die? Maybe it was more like multiple near-misses with eternal agony— since then. To preserve the relative peace of the moment. 
"So how'd you beat the devil, then?" he asked.
"I had everything to lose. Lucifer had nothing to lose, and only a paltry amusement to gain."
Was that an answer? Hob wasn't sure. 
"Okay," he said. "Well, I do have all of my dreams to lose, apparently. Plenty of incentive to win."
Ice crystallized along the rim of Dream’s glass, spreading from where his fingers pressed. “You speak as if you think I would ever allow this to happen.”
Hob raised an eyebrow. “I thought the magic was binding?”
“Only by honor.”
“And so… what would happen if you violated that honor?”
The words trickled out of Dream reluctantly. “One’s word would not be trusted again.”
“Right. Exactly. I can’t let you do that, love. There’s a whole eternity of words needing to be trusted after this.” It was tempting, honestly, to let his more powerful friend step in and handle this—especially as Hob still hadn’t gleaned what the hell he’d even done to piss off Phaethon—but ultimately, it wouldn’t be right. He’d never used Dream as a clean-up tool for any of his problems in the past, and he wasn’t about to start just because he now knew he was the Lord of Dreams.
Dream’s expression darkened further. He truly was capable of embodying shadow when he was annoyed; Hob didn’t know how he hadn’t figured out the extent of his supernaturalness sooner, honestly. “You would not let.”
“Hey. Come on. I’ve solved plenty of my own problems, haven’t I? Have a little faith.” Hob kind of wanted to pat his hand, but wasn’t sure it was a good idea. “You don’t think I can win a duel against this Phaethon guy?” 
Dream seemed uncertain about it, and Hob couldn’t help but feel a little offended. Sure, he wasn’t a supernatural entity, but Hob had gotten himself out of a fair number of scrapes, and without the help of any Endless, thanks very much! 
“His rancor disturbs me,” Dream said at last. “I do not know what you have done to offend him.”
“Nor I. Never met the guy.”
Dream seemed lost in contemplation. Hob let him, and kept eating the chips.
Eventually, Dream said, “Even if this loss did come to pass… you would always have a place in the Dreaming.”
Hob’s breathing stuttered. “With you?” he said, sounding much smaller than he’d expected. It was… an ill-considered response, to say the least. 
Dream shifted in his seat. “I am the Dreaming,” he said. “It is part of me, and I it.”
“I see,” said Hob. But the thought kept turning within him.
---
No more was said on the matter until their beers were drunk and their chips polished off and they were strolling out the door of the pub. 
As they crossed the threshold, Hob was struck by a realization. He slapped Dream on the breast of his coat, stopping him in his tracks.
"I'm an idiot! Of course it's not like chess. It's metaphysical rock-paper-scissors!"
"Are you intoxicated?" Dream asked wearily.
"Nope. Just happy to have my old friend around again."
Dream’s form, unbreakable as the darkness between stars, stuttered. Behind him, his shadow wavered.
Then he swept away, leaving Hob to catch up. 
---
They met again on the field of battle, so to speak.
Phaethon was there before them, melodramatic in his white-and-gold cape. Not as melodramatic as Dream, though, whose eyeliner seemed darker than usual, somehow, and whose cloak swept all the way to the ground, pooling more like liquid than fabric. He was very displeased about these events, Hob could tell.
Hob shook Phaethon’s hand formally. Once again, the touch burned him, but he resisted the urge to shake his hand out in pain. Then they stood across from each other. Hob wished he had a sword, but that was not this game.
"As the challenged party, you commence the duel," Dream told him, standing not far from Hob’s side as Phaethon paced before them, grinning. "You may choose your form and begin."
Hob had thought long and hard about how he would start. He didn't want to go too big, else the fight escalate beyond his control. Obviously, he didn't want to pick something weak either.
What was out there that had tormented mankind, sowing destruction, breeding fear and illness and death, while barely reaching higher than an ankle? 
Hob had lived through it. The choice was obvious.
"I am a plague rat," he started, and saw Dream’s eyebrows twitch. Impressed. Ha! "Hiding in shadows. Letting sickness into our food, homes, blood."
He saw the rats in his mind. Scurrying through tunnels, climbing into grain stores, unaware of what they carried. A seething mass of tails and slick fur and beady eyes, churning, churning, churning. 
Phaethon curled in on himself, limbs creaking, boils popping on his skin and pus leaking from his eyes. Hob flinched at the reminder of those times. Horrible, horrible times.
Mentally, Hob prepared for the counterattack. Paper beats rock. What beats rat? Dog beats rat. Cat beats rat. Famine, extermination fumes, plague doctors, modern medicine—
"I," Phaethon ground out, through the contortions of his body, "am a flood."
Oof. Good one.
"A swelling, raging river, decimating any town in my path. Washing rats down to their deaths." 
A phantom wave smacked Hob in the face and hurled him to the ground. It crashed over him, gallons and gallons of water, surging up his nose, into his eyes, down his throat. He choked on it. He drowned in it. Debris in the floodwaters bruised him till he felt like a branch spinning out in the current, rather than a human.
Then. He managed to take in a breath.
He staggered to his feet.
Dream was standing a step closer, like he'd lurched forward, but he forced himself back into stillness.
"I," Hob said on a gasping breath, pushing wet hair out of his eyes, "am a drought." Phaethon had taken it to another level? Fine. Hob would go scorched earth. "Whisking away all your water. Turning everything into dust."
Phaethon choked, throat suddenly dry. His eyes went bloodshot. His skin flaked and peeled, his lips bled. He clutched at his stomach as it heaved for water.
He could go rain again, Hob thought. Or ice age. Asteroid. Biblical flood—does that count if he already did a regular flood?
"I am famine," said Phaethon, when he'd recovered himself, though he was still rasping. "I wither crops without water. I starve everything that walks."
Hob's stomach caved in on itself. He fell to his knees, retching nothing but bile. His mind flashed back to his decades on the streets, so long without food he'd thought his stomach would start eating itself—and then it had. 
His arms shook. His body felt thin and liable to crack. 
"I," he croaked, still on all fours, "am an oasis. Rising from the desert, real, not a mirage. Offering reprieve." 
Too late, he realized this might restore his opponent. 
But instead, Phaethon creased and cracked, like he was the famine, persecuted by salvation. He clasped his stomach as if it was overfull; water poured from his mouth.
Water filled Hob's mouth, too, but it restored him. He climbed back to his feet.
Dream was definitely closer now. He wasn't imagining it. Still, he didn't intervene.
Phaethon was visibly weakened, but still he said, "I am selfishness. Infighting over limited resources. Society destroying its oasis."
Hob's limbs were torn in opposite directions. He yelled, but the invisible hands on him didn't let up, yanking at him like he was the final piece of food before everlasting deprivation. He pulled at them, but it was no use.
One of his shoulders dislocated with a loud pop, and he bit down on his tongue so as not to scream. Blood exploded in his mouth.
"I am generosity!" he yelled, blood dripping over his lips. "I am brother sharing with brother. Stranger sharing with stranger."
Dream was looking at him now like he didn't know what to make of him. Phaethon, too, was staring at him, but with a look of disgust. 
"High-minded idealist, are you?" he sneered. "What the hell is generosity going to—”
His expression broke in half. His hands shook; he picked at his nail beds until they peeled and started bleeding. His lip wavered and his eyes beaded with tears.
Hob didn't know what was happening to him.
"Shame," Dream breathed from behind him. "So clever, Hob."
Hob hadn't actually known what generosity would do, but he appreciated the compliment nonetheless.
"I," croaked Phaethon, through tears, "am memory. History and anger curdled to a resentment which no generosity can overcome."
He felt Dream’s eyes on him, as he no doubt feared the anger, the resentment he so believed that Hob held over his absence would surge forth again. But it did not, for Hob had never been angry with Dream. Angry with himself, yes, and that he felt acutely, along with the fear and hurt of Dream walking away, the stewing guilt of it.
Memory held more than anger. Mostly, for Hob, it held grief. Grief for his friend who'd been imprisoned for so long, while Hob went about his life, imagining him lonely, isolated perhaps, but never knowing the truth. Grief for himself, too, for he knew that to always blame himself for Dream’s behavior had also been unfair. 
Tears slipped from his eyes. He looked over at Dream, who was still watching him warily.
Memory had far too many facets for Phaethon to use it as an effective weapon.
"I am forgiveness," Hob said, closing his eyes against a fresh welling of tears. He didn't know who he was forgiving. Himself, or Dream, who still seemed to need absolution from Hob, no matter how Hob told him he didn’t.
"I am hatred!" Phaethon snarled. His voice had gone animalistic in a last ditch effort to come out on top. But forgiveness clanged around him, pulling tears from his eyes, undermining his viciousness. "I am division even forgiveness cannot mend."
Just like that, he opened up the path for Hob to take his king. Checkmate. Game over. Rock paper scissors shoot.
"I am love," Hob said quietly, even as a sob caught in his throat as the memory of all the hate he'd witnessed in his life, the hate he'd participated in, and the fear, long-held, that even Dream might hate him, for his wrongs, or for overstepping, pulsed back to the forefront. He could never hate Dream, though. No matter what.
"Love can be easily destroyed," snapped Phaethon, but he was wavering. 
"But it always comes back," said Hob. Unwitting, he looked over his shoulder at Dream.
His friend was already looking directly at him. That tinge of red, so terrible and familiar now, was back along his eyes. He didn't speak, not to Hob. Hob followed his gaze as he looked over Hob's shoulder and spoke to Phaethon.
"Do you have a counter?"
"Love?" Phaethon laughed hysterically. "You brought love to a duel?"
"I believe Hob brings love everywhere he goes," said Dream, and Hob whipped back around to look at him, eyes wide. The tiniest smile was dancing on Dream’s lips.
Then a blade erupted from Hob's chest.
Blood sprayed. His heart stopped beating—actually stopped, he felt it. The sword had pierced right through it. He scrabbled for it with clumsy hands, but the blade shiiiinged back out before he could grab it. 
Blood spattered Dream’s face. Those pretty lips parted, eyes widened, the lordly bearing wiped from his expression leaving only a person, shocked and wounded. Hob would never forget that look of startled horror for as long as he lived. 
Which wasn't looking to be that long.
He fell to his knees, blood pouring from his chest. No use trying to stop it. It would mend itself, in time, but that knowledge did nothing to stop the instinctive rush of fear. He was dying. He was dying.
He fell on his side. Blood soaked his shirt. All told, it took maybe ten seconds after getting speared like a wild hog—
—for the world to completely blink out.
---
Hob's chest ached like a bitch when he woke. 
He was still on the ground, bloody mud around him, soaking his clothes. Oh. That was mud made from his blood. How horrifying. 
He opened his eyes in time to see Dream lifting Phaethon from the ground by his neck. His hand was a vice grip and Phaethon choked, scrabbling at his fingers for breath.
"TREACHERY," Dream snarled, louder than Hob had ever heard him. His voice boomed across the empty park. "I will unmake you."
"I'm not one of your creatures, you can do nothing to me," said Phaethon, but his assuredness flickered.
Dream’s being was a black hole eating light. "Watch it happen."
Hob coughed, dirt trapped in his throat, and shoved himself up on his forearms. Dream froze, and turned slowly to look at him, Phaethon still clasped in his hand like he weighed nothing. Dream’s attention was like being in the path of a comet.
"Hob," he said. "Are you alright?"
Hob knew, in that moment, that if he asked Dream to spare Phaethon from whatever fate he had in mind for him, he would comply. And what power that was. Hob didn't want to be the one doling out mercy or punishment, like a judge at the gates of Hell. But damn if it wasn't a thrill to have Dream look at him like that.
"Of course I'm all right," he said, with a bloody grin. "I'm Hob Gadling."
Dream smiled too, a ferocious smile, like that of a wolf.
Hob didn't tell him to spare Phaethon.
Apparently, they both had some savagery in them.
---
"So why did he kill me?" Hob asked later, when he'd showered all the blood off—God he loved modern showers—and they were both sitting at the kitchen table in his flat, drinking tea. Well, Hob was drinking tea. Dream was just kind of staring at it. "I mean, the cost of losing wasn't even that high. Not on his end, anyway."
"He was not interested in you at all," said Dream, still not looking at him. "I dragged the truth from him while you were… gone. This was all a ploy to get to me. To hurt me—indirectly, of course. Such a lower being could never hurt me directly."
"Wait." Hob tried to grapple with this. "You— are you saying I was like a kidnapped princess?" 
Dream frowned. "If you insist. The point is, he did not plan to let you walk away. By winning, or by killing you, whichever he could accomplish." 
"Damn. Maybe I should have let you fight for me."
"No. You represented yourself admirably. More than admirably. You won the challenge, fairly, and did not try to kill your opponent to do it." 
Praise from Dream always hit Hob somewhere deep. Possibly because Dream only said such things when he meant them. Possibly just because it was Dream saying them.
“Well, thanks for handling him in the end,” Hob said, instead of voicing that sentiment.
Dream nodded solemnly. “I would not allow such harm to befall you without interfering,” he said.
Hob took a sip of his tea to avoid showing how he felt about that quite so obviously on his face.
“Why did he want to hurt you, then?” he asked instead.
“He is the child of a sun deity,” said Dream.
“And… that… means…?”
“Sunlight chases away dreams. We are natural enemies.”
Hob frowned. “What about daydreams?” 
“Daydreams may take place during the daytime, but they exist in the darkness of the inner mind,” said Dream.
“Ahhhh.” Hob nodded sagely. Yeah, sure, that made sense. One hundred percent. Absolutely. “I don’t know, I feel like some dreams can survive in the daylight. Thrive, even.”
“Perhaps next time I have an altercation with a sun deity, I will call upon you,” Dream said, a bite of sarcasm in it. “To see if you can banish them with this mindset.”
“Don’t give me that cheek,” Hob admonished. Dream’s mouth popped open in offense, but Hob plowed on, “Just have an open mind about it, that’s all I’m saying. Who knows, maybe you guys are in a symbiotic relationship or something, instead of enemies. You help people see what could be possible, and they balance it with reality.”
Dream was silent for a moment, thinking. “Perhaps,” he said at last. “But I do not think approaching them in this manner will serve me well, at the moment.”
“Maybe not if they’re going around attacking you,” Hob conceded, and Dream cracked a small smile.
Sun deities, Hob thought. Really, life was full of such strange and interesting things.
“So when you went to Hell,” Hob started. Dream tilted his head, but didn’t seem thrown by the change in subject. “What did you wager in exchange for your helm? The game makes you wager something, right?”
“It was the demon who chose the other side of the wager,” said Dream. “He demanded I remain in Hell and serve him for eternity, if I lost.”
Hob was glad he’d put down his tea, as he’d probably have dropped it. “What? Was the helm really worth that risk?”
Dream leaned back in his chair, lips pressed tight in offense. Or maybe hurt. “I am nothing without my tools of office,” he said.
“That is not true,” said Hob, surprised by his own vehemence. Nothing? He thought he was nothing?
“I could not have restored the Dreaming without them,” Dream insisted.
“Okay, fine. They’re important for your job. But that doesn’t mean you’re nothing without them.” Hob went to lay his hand over Dream’s on the table, hesitated, then decided, fuck it. Dream started when their skin touched, but didn’t move away. Hob repeated his words, with even more emphasis this time. “You’re not nothing.”
Dream met his gaze, challenging. Hob didn’t back down.
“As you wish,” Dream finally said. Which wasn’t actually an agreement. “I can concede that the ruby breaking was ultimately beneficial to my power. But the helm is my symbol of office. To leave it in the possession of a demon is a continual humiliation to my realm and station.”
“Okay, I’m hearing you,” Hob said. It wasn’t that he didn’t think Dream should be able to get his helm back. But he didn’t want Dream to risk horrible punishment for the sake of his pride. Better to slink away alive to try again another day, or so Hob felt. That wasn’t Dream, though.
“Just be careful, okay?” he said. “Even if you lost your helm and everything, and everyone in Hell thought you were pathetic—which, by the way, not sure Hell’s opinion is worth much anyway? but that aside—I’d still rather have you here than the alternative.” He threw Dream a smile, hoping he didn’t take offense to the idea that he could possibly be pathetic. “It wasn’t ‘The King of Dreams and Nightmares, et cetera’ that I missed for all those years, you know?”
“You did not know who I was, then,” Dream pointed out, but he seemed contemplative.
“I liked who I did know,” Hob said. “My friend.”
“Your friend,” repeated Dream slowly. Finally, he did pick up his tea, and took a sip. “A powerful title indeed, if you would have me when it is the only one I carry.”
“If you say so,” Hob said, which brought a small smile to Dream’s lips. If Dream wanted to think of it as a title akin to his kingship and endlessness and whatnot, then Hob would bestow it on him with gladness, and with a warm sense of honor that nestled right in his heart.
“It is…” Dream added, at length, “a meaningful title. To me.”
Rare, those expressions of feeling from Dream. Hob couldn’t help but to bask in them like a cat in a sunbeam. He remembered how Dream had looked at him during the duel. Love always comes back. Worth it, all the strife, to see Dream look at him like that, he thought.
“You defended me,” Dream said. “To prevent me taking the duel in your place. To protect me when it was not warranted.”
Wasn’t warranted. Hob really wished Dream would just learn to let Hob care for him.
"Would have even if I'd known it was you he truly wanted," he said. “I missed my friend for long enough. Wasn’t going to let something happen again when I could get in the way of it.”
“Your friend,” Dream said again. As if savoring the words. His lips tipped up again in a small smile. One just for himself.
Hob squeezed his hand on the table. A grounding touch, a reminder. “And don’t forget it.”
Dream turned his hand over on the table, and squeezed back.
221 notes · View notes
zepskies · 1 year
Text
Love Actually - Part 2
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Paring: Soldier Boy/Ben x Reader
Summary: You and Ben steel yourselves in order to meet your crazy family for Christmas dinner.
AN: Here’s the requested Part 2! It got too long, so I had to break it up lol. There will be a Part 3 after this (final part). I also tried really hard to find an image/gif that would match this chapter better, but alas, there are only so many pictures of this scruffy guy. (And none in a real suit. 😂)
Read Part 1
Remember, this story is set in the same world as “Break Me Down,” and set before “Checkerboard.” But this can be read as a stand-alone! Hope you enjoy…
Word Count: 4,800 Tags/Warnings: Tense situations, bit of angst, lots of sexy fluff
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Part 2: "Season’s Greetings"
Ben checked his watch again. 
He’d lost count of how many times, how many minutes, how long he’d been waiting for you to come down the goddamn stairs so he could get this night over with. 
You’d been getting ready for this dinner with your family for four hours. How long did it take you to slap on some makeup and throw on a dress?
Finally, he heaved a sigh and got up from the couch, adjusting the watch on his wrist. He stayed by the foot of the stairs and called up to you.
“Hey. What’s taking so damn long?” he asked. His brows were furrowed, mouth set in an aggravated frown. “I already told you. I’m not planning on being at this thing all night. So if you don’t come down here in the next ten minutes, I swear to fucking Christ—” 
Ben stopped short, as he heard your footsteps at the top of the stairs. When he looked up with expectant, pursed lips, his face subtly froze. 
“What? What’re you gonna do?” you teased. Tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, you grasped the guardrail and carefully made your way down the stairs. These heels were no joke. 
You had a black suede clutch tucked in your other hand, but Ben was drawn to the bright red of your dress. The color alone appealed to him. It called back a memory of a musty club, rich whiskey, and the dulcet tones of your voice.
But now, this dress was shorter. It also hugged your every curve and stopped just a few inches above the knee. He noticed a tantalizing little slit in the back, at the hem, leading his eyes down your sheer pantyhose and down to the tall, black heels.
His lips formed a teasing smile. “You sure you can walk in those?” 
But you could see the truth in his eyes; he liked what he saw. They raked back up your body, taking in the short sleeves, the slight plunge of the neckline, the red lipstick as bright as your dress, the soft sweep of eyeliner and dark lashes—and you hoped he noticed the way you’d painstakingly done your hair into soft, ‘40s style waves.
“Do I look shaky to you?” you countered.
Ben tilted his head slightly as he stared up at you. “Not one bit.”
He reached out for you on the last step of the stairs. You took his hand and gave him a grateful look, but your hand didn’t stop there. It grazed up the sleeve of his suit jacket as you took him in with a smile.
Not often one to don a simple black suit, Ben went with a charcoal gray against a crisp black undershirt. No tie though, leaving the first couple of buttons casually open. 
“Look at my man, all sharp and modern and sexy as hell,” you purred. He accepted the praise with a pleased quirk of his lips. 
Normally you wouldn’t try to feed his peacock-level pride too much. He knew he was a damn fine-looking man. However, you also knew he wasn’t totally into meeting the rest of your family tonight. You knew you needed to give him a (well earned) ego boost.
“Gotta match my girl,” said Ben. Though he fingered the ends of your softly curled hair with a more genuine glint to his smile. “Though you’ve gone a bit vintage.”
“Compromise.” You grinned, and you leaned up for a soft kiss. 
He met you there, even pressing his luck when his tongue begged entrance against your lips. You held his cheek and brushed your thumb there tenderly, but you soon broke away. 
“We’ve got somewhere to be,” you reminded him. Ben sighed through his nose, though his hands molded to your waist.  
“I didn’t realize you were that kinky,” he said. His voice was deep and suggestive. Your face started to heat up, even as your brows knitted with confusion.
“What?” you asked. 
“I know you’re not gonna make me wait all night to get a taste of this,” he said. And he leaned down to begin plying you with his heavy hands and his lips along your neck. “I gotta assume you want me to fuck you in your mom’s house.”
You uttered a shocked laugh. You batted his shoulder, even though it didn’t even make him blink. His lips curved as they grazed your neck. He inhaled under your ear, making a pleasant shudder run down your spine. He hummed in approval.
“Is that the perfume I got you?” he asked. 
“Mhmm,” you nodded. “I like it a lot. Makes me feel all warm and spicy.”
Ben chuckled into your neck. He did pull back eventually to thumb around the edge of one of your earrings—the second part of his Christmas gift to you. The white stone and silver filigree shone in the light. 
“They look good,” he remarked, giving you a charming smile. “Better on you than the catalogue girl.”
Now that was an image. Soldier Boy: browsing through a magazine of women’s jewelry. You smiled brightly at him. 
“Thank you, baby,” you replied. “They really are beautiful.”
Then you glanced down to find your gift to him on his wrist: a new silver Rolex. You turned his hand over to make sure that it fit him right.
“Not too tight, right? Not too loose.” you asked.
He shook his head. “Nah, it’s good.”
“Just good? Does it still need adjusting? We can go back to the store and have them fix it—”
“It’s perfect, sweetheart. Stop fussing,” he said. Your lips pursed as you looked up at him from the watch. 
“I just want to make sure you’re happy with it, that’s all,” you said. 
“I am,” he replied. But his smile, the hidden glint of something in his eyes, made you blush. Inside, you were warm and pleased.  
“All right, let’s go then,” you said. “I’ve got the rum cake, and the actual rum ready to go in the kitchen. And the presents are lined up by the door. Can you load those up in the car for me while I get the food?”
Ben obliged you, though he soon balked at the army of presents waiting for him by the door. When did you have time to get all of these? He didn’t remember you buying all this shit. 
Though he realized, this must’ve been how you filled your time after work, while he was gone for the past two weeks on that mission. 
As he loaded the gifts into the car, Ben reluctantly remembered that it had been…strange, to be away from you. For the past few months, you two had fallen into a rhythm. Waking up to each other, busy morning routines before work, sharing your evenings afterwards. 
You had also been making it your mission to find new things to do together. Like paintballing, of all things. Or comedy shows, new movies and restaurants, concerts, club nights with your friends. Though it was weird for him, sometimes, to go to a show without all the celebrity fanfare he used to get as Soldier Boy.    
Well, he was still Soldier Boy. He just wasn’t getting paid anywhere near the same as he used to. (But let’s face it, he didn’t need the damn money. He’d earned plenty in 40 years of fame and family inheritance.) 
People still knew his name, still worshiped him at times, but it wasn’t the same. He wasn’t part of Vought’s machine anymore. No one really told him what to do, but if he wanted this life—here, in upstate New York—he was forced to make efforts to color within the lines of the law (mostly). Hell, he actually worked for a living. Even if it was for the government.  
The point was, he was part of something. And it wasn’t totally shit, even if he was surrounded by morons on a daily basis…  
By the time you opened the passenger side door to interrupt his musings, Ben remembered to actually start the car. 
“You okay?” you asked as you clicked in your seatbelt. You were keeping a close eye on him tonight, trying to gauge his shifting moods. 
Ben hesitated, but when he glanced over at you, he reached over and thumbed at your chin, under those ruby red lips. It made you smile. 
“Yeah,” he replied. Though he let out a subtle breath as he faced the road and took the wheel of the car. Ever perceptive though, you sent him an assessing look. 
“You’re not nervous, are you?” you asked. His brows furrowed slightly.
“Why would I be?” he asked, his voice a bit sharp. Defensive, you interpreted. 
Instead of answering, you leaned over and laid a hand on his thigh.
“Look, my mom already likes you. Louisa’s going to come around,” you said. Your mouth edged into a smile, of sorts. “I just need you to stop me from killing my aunt with a ladle.” 
Ben snorted in response. “All right.”
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When the two of you arrived at your mother’s house, she opened the door to her home and greeted your boyfriend like a long-lost son. 
“Oh, Ben! Come in, please,” she beckoned, grabbing his arm and guiding him inside. “You look so handsome, my goodness!” 
Ben couldn’t help offering a smile. It was infused with his usual charm. 
“Marie,” he greeted with a nod. You shook your head, despite your own smile. Ben liked attention—along with a bit of praise and fanfare went without saying. And you knew your mom wouldn’t be the only one to play into that tonight. 
“Hi, Mom,” you said pointedly, with a hand on your hip. Marie turned to you with a bright smile. 
“Oh! Honey, there you are. Merry Christmas!” She brought you in and hugged you tight. She then fairly gushed as she took in your dress and touched your hair. “Oh, you look so beautiful. I wish you’d come earlier though. I need you to help me and Trina. Come on.”
Marie glanced up at Ben again. “Oh, you too, hun! We can introduce you to everyone.”
Ben nodded. He followed your lead behind your mother, and you inwardly steeled yourself on the way to the kitchen. The familiar smells awaiting you brought you back to the better parts of your childhood. Ones that were filled with music, laughs, and good food.    
And if there was one redeeming quality about your Aunt Trina, it was that she could cook her ass off. Since your mom had always been more of the “boxed meal” variety cook, Trina always took over at Thanksgiving and Christmas, and just about every other family gathering. 
She was putting the ham in the oven while your sister sat at the kitchen table with your Grandpa George, peeling potatoes. The bigger table in the dining room was currently set up with appetizers and wine. 
But the sounds of chatter and pots and pans and cabinets closing—it all stopped when you and Ben entered the kitchen. You felt his hand at the small of your back, and whether he meant it to or not, that familiar touch stabilized you. 
Even Trina stopped giving Louisa directions on how to correctly peel and cut the potatoes for boiling. Her mouth opened when she took in the sight of Ben, from head to toe. 
“Good evening,” he said, if only to break the silence. 
But you knew the rest was up to you. You curled a hand around his solid arm and gave him a smile, before looking to your family. 
“Hey, guys. Merry Christmas!” you greeted. “This is my boyfriend, Ben.”
Trina squealed in excitement. She came over (with a wooden spoon in hand) to give you an enthusiastic hug and kiss. She held your arms and looked between you and Ben. 
“Your mom said you were dating a superhero, but I had no idea…” she twittered. “I mean…it’s Soldier Boy. He’s in my kitchen!” 
“It’s Mom’s kitchen, actually,” you muttered. Trina’s excitement dimmed slightly as she rolled her eyes at you.
“Ever the smart mouth,” she said, playfully whacking you in the ass with her spoon. 
Ben smirked. He certainly agreed with your aunt’s assessment. He turned to her to offer something in greeting, but before he could, Louisa’s voice cut in from across the room. 
“What should we call you? Ben, or Soldier Boy?” she asked dryly. 
You frowned, gave your sister a look. Meanwhile, Ben didn’t quite make it to a smile, but he was civil when he answered her. 
“Ben’s fine.”
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You remained in the kitchen to help out, while Ben migrated to the living room with your grandfather. Ben grabbed a large glass of wine on his way there, along with a few mini quiche to tide him over until dinner. 
He then noticed an old woman sleeping on the leather recliner. 
“Who’s that?” he asked George. 
“Oh, that’s Great Aunt Sylvia,” George said. “She just took an oxy for her hip. She’ll be passed out ‘til dinner.”  
Ben blinked at the casual mention of oxycodone, but he wouldn’t mind a few of what Sylvia was having. Oxy gave him such a nice buzz. 
But instead, he and George sat on opposite ends of the couch while Sylvia snored away. 
For a moment, it was quiet, save for the soft crooning of Nat King Cole playing (and Sylvia). The music came from a small round speaker on the coffee table, Ben noticed. You’d told him about Alexa and Siri and all those techno bitches out there now, controlling people’s houses. He didn’t trust it. 
“You like baseball?” George asked as he turned on the TV. Ben nodded, and the other man put on a game. Mets versus the Cubs, three to one. The men were silent for a while as they watched the game. 
Unfortunately for Ben, that peace couldn’t last. 
“So,” George started. “You’re a supe, huh?”
Ben inclined his head, sipping at his wine. This was what he fucking hated. Small talk. 
“I remember you,” George said. “My wife and I liked that movie you made…King of Kings. With Charlton Heston. What a classic that guy was.”
Ben smiled. “He was a good time. Drank like a fucking fish.”
George raised a brow. “Did he? Well, we all need a glass every now and then.”
Ben nodded, taking a pointed sip of his wine. 
“Heston. One of the few celebrities I gave a shit about when he died,” George said with a shake of his head. “Wasn’t long before my wife’s passing.”
You’d told Ben a lot about your grandmother. When your parents got divorced, she’d insisted that you, your mom, and your sister live with her and George. She didn’t want to take any chances with your dad, who’d been more than unstable at the time in his drinking. 
Ben didn’t often pray. But he drank then with a silent toast, that good ole’ Jon was getting hot coals up the ass right about now. In hell.
Ben then considered your grandfather’s musings, realizing he hadn’t thought about his old pal Heston in a long time.  
“How’d he die?” Ben asked. George glanced over at him.
“Well, official case was pneumonia. But it wasn’t all that clear,” he said. “However, I think he had a flare up.”
“Of what?” Ben asked.
George gave him a wry look. “The fate that all men fear. Ass cancer.”
Ben raised a brow, his mouth twitching. He had a feeling he knew where your sense of humor came from. 
“You probably don’t have to worry about that,” George waved a dismissive hand. “You’re still young. Well, sort of…I mean, being superhuman and all that. I’m sure that comes in handy with the normal stuff, like the sniffles and whatnot…and hey! At least you won’t have to worry about your asshole fallin’ out.”
Ben actually smiled. Now he knew you were related to this man. 
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In the kitchen, you were trying and failing to dodge a game of “Twenty Questions” with your aunt, while you and your sister finished cutting potatoes. All of the questions were predictably centered around Ben. Luckily, you had a plate of mini quiche, cheese, and salami between you and Louisa to keep you pacified. 
“Well, you’ve done well for yourself, I’ll give you that,” Trina said. “But why on God’s green Earth didn’t you tell us you were dating Soldier Boy? How the hell did you even meet him?”
Shit. There was more than one reason you hadn’t told the rest of your family yet, and this was partly it. How the hell were you supposed to explain this? 
Louisa shot you a knowing look, along with a raised brow. 
“Well, I was actually assigned to find him after he…went missing last year,” you said, keeping things purposefully vague. “We met and…things just kind of took off from there.”
Your mom and your sister didn’t even know all the details, but they knew this much. After Soldier Boy used his nuclear power to end Homelander, he’d escaped in the aftermath. 
You’d been working a year in Surveillance at Supe Affairs, but you’d been a private investigator by trade, previously working at your father’s firm. You’d even worked at Vought for a few years, before joining the S.A. 
You were then recruited by Grace Mallory to track down Soldier Boy, along with Butcher and his team. 
…And that’s where things got complicated. 
“But isn’t Soldier Boy the one who killed Homelander?” Trina asked. She stopped in her stirring of the cranberry sauce to look back at you. And you met her stare directly. 
“Yes. He was partnered with the CIA on that.” Sort of. You added, “Homelander wasn’t the hero you all thought you knew, remember? He was a raging psychopath.”
Trina huffed at that. 
“So was your father. And you still worked with him for years,” she remarked, even off-handedly as she went back to stirring.
Your entire body stilled. Inside, your temper was a lit fuse, preparing to ignite. You stuffed a mini quiche into your mouth to stop you from exploding. 
And your mom and your sister recognized the danger. Louisa frowned tightly and touched your arm. 
She had been too young to form a true relationship with your father by the time your parents were divorced, and your grandparents (and later you) hadn’t allowed Jon to interfere too much with Louisa's life. So Jon’s death, a mere seven months ago, hadn’t truly affected her as deeply as it had you. 
And that in itself was complicated. 
Marie paused in preparing the sweet potato casserole to give her sister a warning look. 
“Trina, that’s not fair,” said Marie. 
Your aunt shrugged. “It’s the truth, isn’t it?”
Slowly, you stood. You grabbed a hand towel and brushed the velvety remains of potato skin from your hands. You also took the plate of cheese cubes and salami with you. 
“Honey, she just means—” 
“I know what she meant, Mom,” you said. Your mother wasn’t confrontational. She would never tell her sister to shut the fuck up when she was being out of pocket. 
But you had no problem doing so. You walked over to Trina, who saw the look in your eye and actually relented, realizing that there was, in fact, a line, and she had crossed it. 
“Look, I’d like us to continue having a nice evening,” you told her. “Mention my father again, and it won’t be.” 
After a moment, Trina nodded. 
“You’re right. I shouldn’t have said that. Don’t mind me,” she said. But then, she smiled. “I’m really happy for you, sweetheart. You’ve got a superhero! Who knew you’d pull that one off, huh?”
Your flat smile remained. “Oh, yeah? How do you mean?” 
Trina faltered. Apparently, she hadn’t expected that. 
“Oh. Well, you know…”
“No. I really don’t. Can you clarify for me?” you asked, using the same even tone you employed with testy co-workers on the Surveillance team. 
Trina sighed. “Oh, honey. You’re a beautiful girl, but…”
“What?” you challenged. “Just say it.”
Behind Trina’s coil of dark hair piled on her head, Marie looked worried. Louisa was also on tenterhooks, gripping the kitchen table. She slowly got to her feet though, in case she needed to intervene. 
“Well, I wasn’t gonna say anything,” Trina said. She gestured to you, after grabbing a cheese cube off your plate. “But your hips, hun. I mean, I enjoy a snack. A bon bon. A chocolate eclair. The occasional croissant, but the weight don’t come off easier as you get older, does it?” 
You were officially burning like a tea kettle.  
“And with a man like that…” Trina fanned herself with the discarded, empty bag of cranberries. “Mother of God. He’s gotta be beating ‘em off with a fucking stick.” 
Your mom pursed her lips at the salty language, giving Trina a sharp glance (for multiple reasons). 
Trina noticed, but she only popped another piece of salami into her mouth. “Sorry, hun.” 
But then she turned back to you. 
“And have you talked about kids yet? That’ll be some serious weight gain.” 
You let out a sharp breath and raised your gaze heavenward, pleading for mercy. 
“Jesus Christ,” you muttered.  
“I’m just sayin’!” she said. “He might have forever, but you certainly don’t.” 
Now that one struck a nerve. Perhaps not the one she intended, but it cut deeply into you all the same. You and Ben had agreed to pin that conversation for now, but the fact was, he would continue to age much slower than you. 
At your steely glare, Trina again raised her hands. This time in placating defense. “I’m trying to help you, is all I’m saying.” 
You gripped the edge of the kitchen counter so tight you thought a manicured nail might break off. You’d reached the end of your tether. 
“I’ve been here for all of five minutes—” 
“Okay, you know what?” Louisa finally stepped in and grabbed your arm. “I need your help. Let’s find the red tablecloth so we can set the table.”
She led you out of the kitchen and into the hall, but you stopped short so fast that you skidded a bit in your heels. You took deep breaths and braced a hand against the wall.  
You turned to your sister. “Why doesn’t she attack you like that?” 
“Oh, believe me,” Louisa said, rolling her eyes. “I had my turn before you got here. I’ve been locked in with these clucking hens all morning.” 
A grin twitched at the corner of your lips. 
“My condolences,” you said. But then, you look at your sister a bit harder. “And you. What’s your problem, huh? How long are you going to give Ben a hard time?” 
It took her a moment, but Louisa eventually sighed. 
“I mean, Aunt Trina’s an asshole, but she kind of said it. He’s literally a century-years-old,” she said. “How do you not have a problem with that?” 
You crossed your arms, though you knew you didn’t have a good answer for that one. 
“Age is…relative.” You struggled against a wince. 
“He lived through the damn Dust Bowl,” Louisa deadpanned. “He’s fucking ancient.” 
You glared back at her. “Okay, enough. What’s your real problem, huh? I mean really.”
Louisa let out another sigh. Her hands went to her hips. You hadn’t had a chance to tell her, but she looked pretty tonight too in her black dress. It flared at the waist and reached her knees, and she’d paired it with some chunky red heels. She was a little taller than you normally, but not by much. As the older sister, you enjoyed finally being taller than her for once in your higher heels. 
Still, you were annoyed with her right now. You sensed she had something deeper against Ben, and it wasn’t all about his age. When she eventually answered, it just confirmed your suspicions. 
“He’s dangerous,” she said at last. “He’s so fucking dangerous.” 
That disheartened you. Your lips pressed, and you held onto your own arms a bit tighter. 
“Not to me,” you replied. Louisa’s frown deepened as her brows knitted together.
“Especially to you,” she said. “He kidnapped you.” 
You gave a wan smile. “Not technically.” 
That had been one of his subordinates, who’d taken you outside of Ben’s orders…
It was a long and complicated story, but basically, it had worked out for both of you in the end. 
Louisa gave you a more incredulous look. “He’s got an atomic bomb in his chest.” 
“He’s working on controlling it,” you insisted. “He’s gotten a lot better!” 
Louisa threw her hands upward in exasperation and turned to leave you in the hall. You stopped her with a hand on her arm. 
“Look, I get it,” you said, meeting her gaze directly. “You’re worried about me. But here’s the thing…you don’t have to do that. I’m the one who looks out for you, remember?” 
Once again, she frowned at you. “Why, just because you’re older?” 
You gave her a teasing smile. 
“Well, yeah.” Still, you grasped both of her arms, now crossed in front of her chest. “Lou, haven’t I always taken care of you?” 
“Okay, yeah,” she said. “But who takes care of you? Who makes sure you’re all right?” 
You gave her a patient, if knowing look. 
She grimaced. “Oh, don’t you say it.” 
“Honestly, Lou. He does take care of me…he makes me feel safe.” You bit your lip, and your eyes began to well up with the sting of tears, emotion rising in your throat. “I’ve never had that. Ever.” 
Your sister released a heavy sigh. “I know.” 
“Then can you actually try to get to know him? Please?” You rubbed her arms, pleading with your eyes. You wanted your family to like your boyfriend, but it was so much more than that. You didn’t want to have separate worlds. Everyone in this house was part of your family, and that now included Ben.
The longer she looked into your imploring eyes, Louisa’s grimace lightened, just a touch. “I’ll think about it.” 
You smiled then, warmly as you hugged your sister. You then kissed her on the cheek, leaving the bright red imprint of your lipstick.
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When you went back into the kitchen, your better mood was ruined pretty quickly by watching your aunt run your mother around the kitchen with demands and instructions. You decided to jump into the fray, taking a large serving bowl out of Marie’s hands before it tipped over.
“How’s the ham doing?” you asked. 
“About half an hour or so, I think,” Trina said. “Maybe forty-five.”
“Okay, and what’s left?”
“Let’s get the desserts ready.”
While your help sorely relieved your mother, it was actually a terrible idea for your mental health. When you could take no more of Trina’s irritating, commanding voice in your ear, you had to take a breath (as well as down a full glass of wine). 
You wordlessly asked Louisa to tag in for you before you traveled into the living room. 
There you found Ben immersed in a baseball game with Grandpa George. Both men only looked up at you when you stood near the couch with crossed arms. Your nerves were on edge, your blood still just short of boiling, but you took pains to look pleasant.
“Who’s winning?” you asked.
Ben quirked a smile at the sight of you, while George gave his more freely.
“5 to 3. It’s close on the Mets,” he said. You realized then that you hadn’t even hugged your grandfather yet. 
“Oh my God, Grandpa! I’m so sorry,” you said with a frown. You went over to hug him. “Trina has me all out of whack.”
George chuckled and patted you warmly on the back. “Why do you think I’m out here?”
You sighed with a wry smile. You then turned to Great Aunt Sylvia, who was still passed out in the recliner. 
“Aunt Sylvia?” you tried. You went over to her and touched her arm. 
“Leave her be, hun,” George told you. “Only the smell of food’ll rouse that woman.” 
Your smile deepened. Then you turned to Ben, who’d been watching you with reserved interest. He’d never seen you with the rest of your family before.
You went to him on his side of the couch and asked, in a tone deceptively light, “How about a tour of the house? You haven’t even seen it all.”
He could admit, it was a fairly big house for just your mother, but he was more interested in the game. 
“I’m watching this,” he said, gesturing at the screen. However, when he saw the tight press of your lips, he knew something wasn’t right with you. You were trying to tell him something with your eyes, he just didn’t know what.
You leaned down, subtly grabbing his thigh.
“I need you,” you whispered in his ear. “Now.” 
The tone of your voice set his blood alight with new interest.
Ben’s resulting smirk was subtle, but edged. 
“A tour it is.” 
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AN: Just when you thought you'd seen the last of my BMD cliffhangers. 😏
How'd you like Ben's introduction to his girlfriend's family? I also sincerely hope you don't have an "Aunt Trina" in your life. 🙄
Next Time:
He grabbed your arms and meant to kiss you, but you stopped him with your fingers against his lips. 
“Two rules: this lipstick doesn’t come off. And no. Ripping. The dress.”
Keep reading: PART 3
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Soldier Boy Masterlist
Main Masterlist
Tag List:
@deans-spinster-witch @this-is-me19 @waynes-multiverse @mrsjenniferwinchester @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @spalady26
@spnwoman @syrma-sensei @wirdbeimaufhebengebunden @muhahaha303 @123passwort
@xoxovienna @katherineann814 @lollag0w0 @globetrotter28 @nancymcl @ashbatz @secretdreamlandmentality @kristophalis @wonderland2022 @emily-winchester @shelh93 @sl33pylilbunny @spoonmynoodle @chernayawidow
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@spnfamily-j2 @im-a-slut-for-fluff @lacilou @venicesem @mimaria420 @vanillawhiskeyflavoredkisses @tearsfortheyouth @agalliasi @chriszgirl92
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584 notes · View notes
peachyjinx · 1 year
Note
smutty ask: Loki & YN having to hide in a cramped closet/narrow space to not get caught by HYDRA agents on their mission. bodies pressed together, breathing gets heavy… 😏🥵
Finally getting around to this! 😂
When in Space...
Loki x Loki x F!Reader
Drabble, 2k words
Warnings: 18+ , heavy make out session, heavy petting
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You slowly walk down the entry hallway, footsteps gently padding the concrete floor below you. Loki walks past you with long strides, shaking his head.
“Our intelligence states that this station is abandoned, no need to be so cautious with your footing,” he casts a teasing smile back at you. 
“Yea, well you just…you never know…”, you feel a blush creep over your cheeks as he continues to smile while walking backwards a few feet in front of you. 
 He’s wearing his new mission suit- tight dark green leather that accents his body shape flawlessly. The perfect “V” of his broad shoulders and narrow hips. His long legs are accentuated by darker leather emphasizing his strong quads. It’s all you can do to keep from drooling.
You shake your head and try to focus on the reconnaissance mission. This is your first mission alone with Loki, and first mission in space. You had been up to the SWORD station in Earth’s orbit once, but that was just to meet the various SHIELD agents and heroes who protected Earth. 
This time it was different- an abandoned HYDRA station only recently discovered. Who knew what sort of traps lay for unsuspecting invaders. And you can’t have a weapon other than knives, which you’re not as proficient at, creating more vulnerability than normal.
Making it extra difficult, it’s just you and Loki- and you’re rarely alone with him nowadays on purpose. In this moment, there are no distractions by teammates, no quick ways for you to excuse yourself when Loki makes a joke or winks at you.  No way to hide your crush on him amidst the chaos of your lives. Just the two of you- alone on a spaceship. 
“Well, actually we do know, and you’re walking quite slow, so please increase your speed. I’d like to get to the computer chambers Rogers spoke of so we can gather our information and leave this abandoned trash heap,” Loki spoke matter of factly as he led the way, and the two of you turned left around a corner. You trot up next to him, speed walking to keep up with his strides.  
“What are you in such a rush for? Got a hot date when we get back to Earth?”, you joke sarcastically.
“Something like that,” he looks down at you and winks with a devilish smile. 
“Ah, of course you do!”, you look away and try to hide your feeling of disappointment bubbling up.  
Your mind wandered for a moment, wondering who it was this time- since he’s been on Earth he’s reveled in the attention of a variety of famous and highly desirable women. 
You feel a knot build in your stomach from thinking about his dating quests, so you take a deep breath, pushing your feelings aside. 
Focus on the mission, and not your raging crush on Loki.
You pull up your comms link on your wrist, and take a look at the map. The information is outdated and may not be accurate, but that’s part of this mission- to confirm current intelligence, and gather anything else that may be of use. 
“Ok directions say to take a left down the hall here…” you look up to see there’s only a straight corridor, and now there are panes of glass lining the right side of the hallway with a view of space. 
You stop for a minute, distracted by the beauty of the sea of stars and depths of blue and black spread before you. 
Loki slowly comes to a stop, watching your pause, and walks up to you with a bemused look. 
He stands next to you, crossing his arms and gazing out of the windows with you. You look up at his broad frame standing very close, mere inches away. The outline of his pale, sharp jawline is a stark contrast to his dark hair- much like the stars against the blackness of space. He’s just as breathtaking as the view. You look back at the expanse of the solar system, enjoying the quiet moment. 
“It really makes you feel insignificant, doesn’t it?,” you quietly ask Loki, feeling like you are in a trance from the beauty before you. The vast emptiness calling you, promising answers yet withholding them.
“Normally I would say absolutely not, but-,” he paused, shifting his body and craning his head towards the direction you had been walking in. 
Slowly, and completely silently, he walks ahead, motioning at you to stay still, bringing a long finger to his mouth to direct you to be silent while his casual demeanor turns serious. You look at him confused, but you know that something is amiss, given his shift in intensity. 
A moment feels like eternity as he stands against the wall and listens, while you stand absolutely still, trying not to breathe loudly. Quickly, he walks towards you, grabbing your wrist tightly and dragging you to the wall where he was. 
“Loki-what-”, you stammer, worry beginning to creep in as you nearly trip over yourself.
“Shh!”, he hushes you as your body is pushed into the very small closet that you didn’t realize was there. It’s a very small server room, the technology long gone but metal shelves remain. You feel his strength as he shoves you up against the metal shelving, as Loki closes the door quietly behind him. 
Loki’s hard chest pushes against your back, his body flush with yours in the tight quarters. The sound of blood and adrenaline pumping courses through your ears, and panic begins to set in. 
Loki begins reciting something in a language you don’t know, and you see green flashes in the corners of the closet.
 You wince as you move your arms to rest on the shelf, trying to get comfortable and not think about Loki’s crotch ghosting your ass. You feel a wave of heat in your core despite the dangerous situation. This is uncomfortable in more ways than one, you inwardly groan.
Loki gently reaches down to your hips, shifting himself and positioning the two of you facing each other so you aren’t up against the metal shelving. You are now facing him, your face in his chest, as he pushes his thigh between your legs and pulls you closer. Another warm flush to your crotch.
“I’ve set a silencing spell, we can talk now”, Loki assures you, as your eyes get accustomed to the near blackness of the closet. The light under the door is just enough for you to see one another and the outlines of the room. 
The two of you look in each other’s eyes, and you realize you’re panting from the exhilaration. 
“What did you hear?,” you ask while trying to not move, knowing he’d notice any slight adjustment of your hips. There isn’t any space between the two of you, and you briefly think of all the times you fantasized about grinding yourself on his muscular thigh.
“Voices. We are not alone on this vessel,” he warns while you stare into his eyes. Even in the dark of the room, you could see the piercing blue.
“Did you hear what they were saying?”, you ask, glancing away from his gaze as your mind suddenly processes all of your senses from the last few minutes at once in the dimmed space. You bask yourself in his smell- warm, with an unknown spice to it. You’ve never been close enough to smell him like this, and it’s intoxicating. 
“No, but we should take respite and come up with a plan,” Loki sighed, and you feel his breath on the top of your head, making you shiver. 
You feel sheepish, not sure what you should do. Normally your mind was sharp with strategy, but you can hardly focus with Loki’s powerful leg in between yours. It's taking every ounce of willpower not to kiss him right now. You suddenly notice that his large hand is against your back, and you feel warmth flood your core again. 
“So much for this being quick. I guess you’ll be late for your date, huh?,” you joke, immediately regretting what you said. 
“We are in a hostile situation with potential enemy combatants, but yet you are concerned about my personal life?”, he lifts your chin so your eyes meet his. A smile is on his face, but this time he doesn’t seem to be mocking you. 
“I…uh…”, you stammer, words disappearing.
Loki begins to chuckle, and you can feel it in your chest. You would gladly walk out of the closet right now to spare yourself from this embarrassing situation. 
“Oh you dear creature, jealousy does not befit you,” he cooed, beginning to run his hand up your back, gently forcing you tight against him.  
Loki leans down, gently pushing the back of your head towards his, and kisses you gently. Desperately, you push back against him, opening your mouth for his tongue, beckoning him to kiss you deeper. You wrap your arms around his shoulders, running your hand through his soft hair. 
Loki’ kisses you more intensely, as the heat between the two of you intensifies, all the worry of your situation disappearing in a moment of pure lust. You can feel his hard cock pushing through his tight leathers, and your hips begin to grind on his thigh. Loki moans as his hands grab your ass, holding you tight to him while he explores your mouth, his tongue massaging yours expertly. 
Wetness is beginning to soak your panties as your make out session heightens when he begins to gently thrust his hips, and you can feel the stimulation on your clit. The two of you are moaning and grinding on each other, neither of you resisting your basest urges.
Loki reaches for your pants, his fingers touching your zipper and you take his cue, exploring his pants for a fly to open while the two of you continue your messy kissing.
Suddenly, light bursts into the closet as the door bursts open and you feel the light wind around the two of you.
A gasp escapes your lips and you tense up as Loki breaks the kiss and the two of you look at the man standing before you. Your brain immediately recognizes the man as not a threat. Your heart is pounding and you can barely calm yourself down. 
“Director Fury, nice to see you,” Loki smiles smugly, as you feel his hands move from your ass to your hips.
“And just what the hell do you two think you’re doing?”, Fury asks, glaring at the two of you intertwined in the closet.
A wave of embarrassment creeps over you as you realize the scene before him: you and Loki, wrapped in each other’s arms, hair messy and looking like two hormone ravaged teenagers. 
You let go of his hair and leathers, trying to adjust yourself to look presentable (to no avail) and clearing your throat while you looked mortified and try not to make eye contact with the Director. 
“Well we were called in for reconnaissance. However, when I heard your team, I figured we should take a moment to ourselves,” he mischievously smiled down at you. 
As it dawned on you what happened, your eyes widen in shock at Loki. Still unable to say anything, you looked back and forth between Loki and Fury, unsure what will happen next.
“...now, if you’ll please excuse us for five more minutes, then we will gladly join you and your team to share information,” Loki said casually as if you weren’t riding his thigh in a dark closet.
Loki reached out, casually closing the door in front of a disapproving Nick Fury. 
“You knew it was them?!”, you suddenly found your voice, peeved at Loki for lying to you. 
“Of course darling, this was simply a ruse”, he smirked down at you, before putting one hand back on your bottom while another reached up to your breast to gently fondle it. You tried to ignore how good he was making you feel. 
“A ruse for what, Loki?”, you asked, disarmed by his gentle groping, as he begins to thrust himself against you again. You accidentally let a moan slip out as you feel the headiness of your lust cloud your thoughts. 
“Don’t act so coy darling, I’ve known you wanted me for some time. Now stop prattling on, we only have a few minutes and I want to make the most of it,” he planted another passionate kiss on your lips, and you melted into his arms, not a care in the world.
---
Peachyjinx Masterlist
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viaoverthemoon · 1 year
Note
I have a small request here too✋ I was thinking about Leon (damnation maybe) x fem!reader with reader being his daughter's kindergarten teacher, and the little one falls in love with her and wants to spend more time with reader, and Leon he finds himself forced to accept this, so he falls in love with the reader. It can be with smut at the end or just something romantic, it doesn't matter.
I hope I explained it ok, I've had this idea in my head for some time but I don't know how to express it 😂❤️❤️
Oooo this sounds so cute stawpppp.
Since I have another fic in the works that's drenched in smut, I'll keep this one fluffy. ;)
Damnation!Leon Kennedy x Fem!Reader
Summary: You're a kindergarten teacher for Leon Kennedy's daughter and she wants to keep you forever!
Tw: Fluff, Mention of deceased relative, Mention of past miscarriage
READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!
Enjoy! <3
To Belong
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"Congratulations, Arabella! It looks like you're our student of the week!"
You gently place the pin on Arabella's shirt, smiling widely at her proud expression.
Being a kindergarten teacher definitely has its downs. But also has its ups as well. One of those ups being the honor of teaching these innocent children. Every day is something new, a new experience that makes you realize the importance of raising the next generation.
Arabella turns towards you, smiling so wide her cheeks must hurt. She grabs onto your leg. "Thank you, Miss (L/N)! This means so much to me!"
You smile down at her, proud of her for using the feelings lesson you'd taught her, and crouch to her level to give her a hug. "You're welcome, Arabella! I'm so proud of you. Thank you for being such a kind student!"
She seems to take your praise very seriously, being super kind to her classmates and staying by you side, asking if you need help or service in any kind of way.
At the end of the day when everyone has left, you sit alone at your desk.
Whilst flipping from one graded paper to another, the door to your classroom creaks open.
You raise your head just in time to see Arabella run into the room, screaming with her arms in the air. "MISS (L/N)!!!!"
You laugh as she runs around your desk and hugs you, babbling nonsense excitedly. "Oh my goodness! Back so soon, Arabella?"
She gives a hyper nod. "Yes!"
"'Yes ma'am', Bella."
Your eyes snap up, locking with a pair of bright blues.
You look at him, surprised.
The man held a strong resemblance to Arabella, minus the straight blonde hair Arabella carried. They shared blue eyes and a soft face. If anything, his rough exterior yet light features suited him. Gave him a mysterious and alluring air that draws people to him, searching to learn more about him.
"Oh- yes ma'am- Daddy look, look! This is the nice teacher I was telling you about!"
You rise from your chair and hold out a hand with a smile. "Nice to meet you, Mr. Kennedy."
He shakes your hand and offers a nod. "Pleasure to meet you too, Miss (L/N). As you can see, I've heard quite a lot about you."
He gives his daughter a pointed look that makes you laugh. You gesture to the seat across from your desk, offering him a seat as you settle back into your chair. "I assume there's a reason you're here that I could help you with?"
Mr. Kennedy sits in the chair, seemingly tired as he falls into the seat and instinctively spreads his legs.
You try your hardest not to acknowledge the action, but your eyes fail you, flickering down his frame for half a second before returning to his face.
You instantly regret your mistake when he smirks at you, straightening up just a bit and resting his arms on his legs. "Actually, I was hoping to discuss what Arabella's behaviors are like while she's at school, as well as how she's learning." He pauses. "I mean, obviously if she's getting student of the month for the 2nd time, she's doing pretty good."
He smiles and playfully ruffles Arabella's hair, earning a laugh from the 5-year-old. "But still. It would be nice to hear from her teacher, not her."
You clear your throat and nod, turning away to escape the burn of his gaze and pulling out a folder labeled A.K., Arabella Kennedy's character chart.
"Of course, I understand. Let's start with how she handles assignments."
After about 45 minutes of talking, Leon seems satisfied with his daughter's school life and begins to pack up his things to leave. But Arabella becomes upset, running to you and refusing to let go of your leg.
"No! I'm not ready to say bye to Miss (L/N) yet!"
She throws the standard child tantrum, small tears streaming down her reddened puffed out cheeks as you gently try to coax her into letting go.
"Arabella... Don't be upset. You'll see me again on Monday-"
But she's relentless, shaking her head and kicking away Mr. Kennedy's hands as he tries to reach for her.
Eventually, he sighs and looks at you embarrassingly. "I'm so sorry Miss (L/N). She's hardly ever like this."
Seeing as this is something you deal with all the time, you just shake your head, offering a small smile. "Don't worry about it. I'm used to this behavior... I'm about to leave for the day. If you guys want, we could go out for a quick dinner? This way, we won't have to part so soon."
This gets the crying 5-year-old to quiet down almost immediately. She looks up from your leg, tears and snot smeared all over your pant leg. "Really? Can we?"
You look up at Mr. Kennedy, raising a brow for conformation. And, seeing as there was no way around it, he gives in.
And from that moment forward, you and the Kennedy family became quite close.
You shared a few dinners and spent time together at amusement parks and entertainment events, eventually becoming so close that you'd even watch Arabella when Leon had to leave for reasons of his job.
You listen to his stories, and he listens to yours.
He shares how he and Arabella have no one else to depend on. Her mother, although she and Leon didn't have a good relationship, had died during childbirth. And how he'd lost his own parents long ago, growing up an orphan and not having much.
And you share only having your parents. You could have had a little one yourself, but unfortunately grieved a harsh miscarriage and the father of the child leaving soon after didn't help.
You both end up having more in common than you'd originally thought.
And now, you share more than just experiences and memories. Now, you share shy looks and ghostly touches.
Somedays his hand will graze yours and you both will avoid each other's gaze, ignoring the sudden spark that comes when you make contact.
That is until, one night Leon returns from a particularly long job to find you curled up on his living room couch with a book in hand, reading glasses perched on the bridge of your nose.
"Hey, sorry for the long night. Never meant to be gone that long." He shrugs off his leather jacket and throws it over the arm of his second couch.
You eye his fatigued figure for a moment before removing your glasses and putting down your book. "No, it's alright. You know I don't mind, Leon."
Sitting up, you pat the spot next to you on the couch, offering him a seat. "Arabella's upstairs asleep in her room..." He gives a soft grunt and falls on the couch, rubbing the back of his neck while nodding and muttering a 'Good. Thank you.'
Eyes skillfully assessing his behavior, you decide to ask him the question that's been on your mind. "Are you okay? Do you need anything?"
He glances at you through his peripheral but instantly looks away. "Yes. I'm fine. You can go now."
In all honesty, the way he suggested you leaving hurt your feelings. But you didn't relent. "If it's alright with you, I'd like to stay..."
Reaching a hand out, you place it on top of his on his lap. He flinches slightly, but doesn't push you away. He pauses for a second...
And then he relaxes, flipping his hand over to wrap it around yours.
Your heart is in your throat and the palms of your hands begin to sweat. But you don't show it, smiling shyly at Leon and holding his hand.
He doesn't look at you. Doesn't show any signs that he acknowledges you besides the fact that he isn't letting go of your hand. "Why do you stay? Why do you want to stay?"
The monotone question catches you off guard. You momentarily freeze as his eyes find you.
Blue frozen glaciers filled with oceans and rivers of pure sadness and regret. The emotion in his eyes makes you briefly wonder where he finds the space for the happiness he feels with Arabella.
Or if he'll have the space for happiness with you.
You take a moment to think, looking down at your linked hands and gliding a thumb over the warmth of his skin. "I feel happiest when I'm here with the two of you. As you know, I don't have much. All I've had to look forward to has been my students... but now... I have the both of you."
You look him in the eyes, trying to convey your emotions through the look in yours. "These past few weeks have been the best I've lived through in years... I'm tired of living alone, Leon. Life is worth so much more when you spend it with somebody else."
He looks at you in shock, not sure what to say about your sudden confession. His mouth opens and closes like a fish, trying to choose the right words to say.
You look away bashfully. "Er- What I'm trying to say is... I'd like it if we could spend... more time together. And see each other more often. But-! It's completely up to you, of course."
For a moment, the silence is nerve wracking. You try not to fidget too much or show that you're anxious in awaiting his answer.
You're beginning to lose hope when Leon's hands are suddenly on your hips.
You're so surprised by his actions that you hardly notice him gently coaxing you into sitting on his lap.
Your legs straddle his thighs, backside rested on his knees when you suddenly notice your position. Your face burns hot, and you rest your hands on his shoulders.
His hands find purchase on your waist. "If I'm being honest, I expected you to leave us a long time ago... I didn't mean to be rude. I just didn't think you'd stay."
He caresses your sides, warm hands heating through the fabric of your clothes. "And... I would like it- a lot if you stayed with us. Not only would you make me happy, but you'd make Arabella happy too. And that matters more than anything."
You pretend to ponder on your decision, looking away with a small smile on your face before turning back to Leon. "Well... I guess I can stick around-"
The sentence barely leaves your lips before Leon pulls you in, kissing you with so much relieved passion that you momentarily feel dizzy.
And for once, you feel like you truly belong somewhere.
Yes. This feeling is definitely one you can get used to.
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Nobody: My inbox screaming and crying for help: 😓😭😭☠️ Me with 0 internet or data: 🧍🏾‍♀️💃📖
Hope you enjoyed!
More requests coming soon!
Requests are open!! <3
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redbullgirly · 8 months
Note
hi hi can i request a max verstappen x footballer smau but she plays for real madrid femenino and we know max is an fcb supporter (also for the sake of the smau, real madrid femenino can be just as good as barcelona femeni) and everyone going crazy when she just takes him to an award ceremony as her plus-one. no soft launch no hard launch and everyone including the grid and christian horner and madristas and everyone is shocked
MADRIDISTAS [MV1/33]
Max Verstappen x footballer!RealMadridFemenino!reader
Masterlist
Summary: Y/N is one of the biggest rising stars in women's football, playing for Real Madrid Femenino. When she's nominated by Women's Football Awards for the Player of the Year, the last thing anybody would expect is her plus one to the ceremony being Formula One driver, Max Verstappen. Not only is he the World Champion himself, but most importantly, Max is a known FC Barcelona fan. Talk about making friends with the enemy...
Warnings: I have very limited knowledge of football, so everything in this story is based on my quick research. If you're a fan, please don't come for me! Though any advice would be much appreciated, because I have more football requests in my inbox XD.
Author's Note: Hi Anon, thanks for the request! I have to say it was quite challenging for me at the start, because I don't know many things about football, but at the end it turned out fun and good. Hope you like what I did with this social media au! :)
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yourusername And it's a wrap!🥈⚽️ Thank you to the whole team for another amazing year, we fought hard and we will continue to fight for the Champions League title next year as 2023/24 runners-up. Hala Madrid!✨🇪🇸
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user1 Love the way you play!
realmadridfem Hala Madrid!💪🏆
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yourusername 💯
user2 💥💥💥
user3 Vamosssss
user4 GO GIRLLL🤩🤩🤩🤩
user5 you really deserved to win the finale, the referee was totally biased agains you!!!
user6 Yeah, even as a FC Barcelona fan I didn't think it was fair🙈
martagarcialopez19 amazing Y/N! 🫶
yourusername Thank youuu!💖
user7 wait does y/n know some people from motosport???
user8 No I think it's just girls supporting girls in sports dominated by men tbh ☺️
liked by the author and martagarcialopez19
user7 oh yeah that makes sense
user9 Buen trabajo que equipo tan bueno con todas y en lo personal muy guapa [Good job, what a great team with everyone and personally very pretty.]
marisabel_rguez The dream team 🙌
liked by the author
yourusername Yessss
user10 HALA MADRID 🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍
user11 literally the prettiest soccer player I ever saw😻
user12 you mean FOOTBALL?!😂🧐
user11 sry i'm american so i'm used to saying soccer
user12 well that's WRONG girly😂
user13 Princess
messages between Y/N and Max
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yourusername Short stop back home in Monaco before flying to London for Women's Football Awards and my nomination for Player of the Year 🤞🌷
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user1 so pretty
maitetxuu_10 The nails Y/N 🤩
liked by the author
yourusername Not better than yours though 😚
user2 i don't watch football but maybe i should start bc of you
user3 Wow you're such a cutie 😍❤️
charlottesiine great work out together!
yourusername Agreed! We should definetly hit the gym together more often 😂
user4 omg wait how do they know each other?? didn't expect y/n y/l/n to be friends with ex-wags??
user5 Idk but they both live in Monaco so it's easy to know basically everyone who's your age there xdd
yourusername True user5, they don't tell you how small the country actually is 😭
user6 SHE IS MY ROLE MODEL EVERYBODY
user7 👏👏👏👏🔥🔥
lucybrozne Seems like the Monaco sun suits you 😁☀️
liked by the author
yourusername Oh thanks Lucy! 🫶
lucybrozne 🫶
user8 i love that despite fcb beating madrid they're still friends outside of the field🥺
user9 WOW you should be a model
user10 So sad your talents aren’t being fully appreciated in Madrid.
user11 oh c'mmon she probably wouldn't play for them if she felt unappreciated 🙄
user12 but tbh I think she should be the captain.... like she's literally the best player of them all BY FAR
user13 Nah I don't like her. Hope she'll never be a captain🤮
user12 then go away? lol
user13 damnn the 3rd picture did some unholy things to me 😩
user14 right?! I don't think I'm straight anymore🫣
user15 I have no idea who she is but let me tell you she's gorgeous
user16 ✨✨✨👑🎀🌹
twitter
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messages between Max and Christian Horner & Max and Carlos Sainz
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yourusername posted on instagram
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tagged: maxverstappen1
yourusername Turning him into Madridista duh.
viewl all 3,084 comments
maxverstappen1 Y/N I love you... but that's never happening ❤️
yourusername Liar! You complained for a week straight about how that referee in the finals wasn't fair and we should have won agains Barcelona! 😘
carlossainz55 hahaaa mate she got you😂
maxverstappen1 😒
user1 OMGGG we converted him on our side!!!
user2 A sad day to be a FC Barcelona supporter and F1 fan😓
user3 A happy day for Madridistas!😍
user4 damn I may have to start watching football
martagarcialopez19 you're glowing! also thanks god now I don't have to keep the secret anymore xd
yourusername Love ya! 🫶
user5 The IT WAG
user6 can we take a moment to appreciate how cute maxie looks here?🥹
realmadridfem You go girl! Convert new fans!🤩💪
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user7 I'm still shocked by this whole thing 😹
user8 you're not the only one lol
user9 the second picture????
user10 Max is so lucky man🥵
marisabel_rquez ¡La pareja poderosa!😍 [The power couple!😍]
liked by the author
user11 this post murdered me and dragged me all over slaycity with how much it served 🤭
user12 exactly! her and max are so hot and pretty
user13 🤍😍💯🥳 Hala Madrid!!!
maxverstappen1 posted on instagram
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maxverstappen1 My girl ❤️⚽️
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THE END
Author's Note: Thank you for reading the whole thing! I'll appreciate likes, reblogs, follows and comments, or any other way of support. Let me know what you think about this pairing and please tell me if there are any football errors, because I have another request about footballer!reader waiting for me. Have a great day! :)
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tenyrasims · 1 month
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𝓚𝓲𝓪𝓷 ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── Thanks to all cc creators♥
cc list: Hair -> by @yin-shimo Skin, skin details, -> by @northernsiberiawinds Eyes -> by @goppolsme New nose piercing -> by @pralinesims Nails -> by @magic-bot
neklace -> by @gorillax3-cc earrings -> by SBE [couldnt find an active DL link sorry :c ] Ring 1 -> by @sclub-privee Ring2 -> by @sugarowl
Body Tattoo -> by @unidentifiedsim
Outfit -> by @dansimsfantasy Leather jacket -> by @plushxsims Boots -> by @astya96cc
Poses by me ♥ Download them -> here
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
Well… yeah, for once I'm lost for words. I don't know. I just wanted to test a hair, and he came out. I can't explain how I feel about him in words that are suited for minors 😂. I'm fucking in love with this dude. I'm actually thinking about ordering posters ... or im gonna bake cookies with his face on so I can eat them.
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with jamil's birthday card preview out we got a new theme for this year's birthday card, that being relaxing my room. it got me thinking of what ace's groovy would be like (because i have biases and ive chosen to be biased to this guy.) i thought of how it could be of him playing basketball with that little hoop on his wall or just him taking a snooze and then it hit me. hear me out, his groovy is just him calling his brother. his brother has been a chara where ace learnt all sorts of tricks and other things about the world from, hes got a good relationship with his brother and has been overall plays a pretty big part of his character esp in his home life and such. in a vignette hes late to deuce's aware ceremony i think because he was up calling his brother. its got such a relaxed vibe of him just calling his brother as everyone is asleep i dunno i think it would fit the theme really well :D and also cuz big brother trappola appearance i mean WHAT now i really want that to be the card..
[Referencing this post!]
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I was surprised by the reveal of pajamas for the 5th birthday line! It’s the first informal set of clothes; every prior iteration was a suit or like… full-on wizard robes 😂 I guess it’s nice to change things up a bit, especially going on 5 years now.
It being a pajama theme actually gives me mild anxiety because as cute as it is, uh… My mind immediately goes to what’s going down in the main story right now, which is anything but cute 😅 It’s… eerily relevant… That aside, it’ll be nice to see the guys comfortable and just lounging around on their sheets. They definitely need it after all the kidnapping attempts and nearly world-ending catastrophes they’ve gone through.
The vignettes you’re talking about are Deuce’s Ceremonial Robes! As you said, Ace is sleepy at the award ceremony because he was up late talking to his brother over the phone. That'd definitely be a neat idea and callback for Ace's Relaxing in Room card! We probably wouldn't see his older brother, but maybe we'd get a little bit more lore too. First I guess we'll have to see what kind of precedent Jami's Groovy and vignettes set though.
All this talk of Jamil and Ace in their pjs makes me imagine the guys in the VDC/SDC squad chilling in their sleepwear in Ramshackle after their practice is done for the day. Telling ghost stories, having pillow fights, doing each other's skincare (Vil's orders)... Sounds like a fun way to unwind~
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tototalks · 2 months
Text
🎵 Pretty woman, walking down the street, pretty woman, the kind I’d like to meet, pretty woman. 🎵
Let’s go!! Time for 💎 Pet 💎
- ‘Ancel was a virgin the first twelve times he has sex. The thirteenth time, it lacked all plausibility’ - What a way to start a story and give insight into the world Ancel lives in.
- You would be SHOCKED how much us redheads get the “does the carpet match the drapes” question from total strangers. Ancel is really living the authentic ginger experience. 😂
- In the times of ancient Greeks and Romans, redheaded slaves were more expensive because they were rarer. In that way, Ancel was designed perfectly to align with his character. Love that choice by Pacat! ♥️
- Ancel has a goal and I respect it, and he’s never once tried to hide it. It’s pretty clear that his love of expensive things comes from having very little at the start of life.
- It’s interesting to gain the perspective of a character detached from the thought of sex being emotionally significant. A first night was everything to Erasmus, and sex is hugely tied in with intimacy and emotional connection for Laurent. Jord and Aimeric fell in love while having sex. Whereas sex, to Ancel, is a means to an end. It’s literally his job.
- Love the implication that pets have their own hierarchy and contracts are fiercely competitive. They have their own little community.
- Ancel uses everything he has to his advantage to incredible effect. He’s pretty, witty, and talented. Whenever he walks into a room it’s like that scene from ‘How to Lose Friends and Alienate People’ where Megan Fox walks through the middle of the pool. Lol
- Now this may be the deeply ingrained European stereotypes I grew up with, but in the same way Laurent is French and Damen is Greek, Berenger is 100% German.
- You always get the sense that even though Ancel is bold and daring, he’s still tiptoeing and walking on eggshells. He completely reinvents himself for every new master he has.
- Haha Isagoras! - very on the nose and I love it
- It makes perfect sense that Ancel can’t read and cares little for long epics and poems. I’d be willing to bet though, that he has an amazing memory because of this. Uneducated does not equal unintelligent.
- Love that Ancel’s there all wide eyed like “yes! Please teach me to ride!” while internally he’s like “ew ew ew”. Don’t blame him. Horses are terrifying.
- I like that Berenger does find out Ancel is faking his interests and tells him that he doesn’t have to pretend. From there, Ancel is clearly more himself and more comfortable.
- In addition, although he’s a creature of habit, Berenger is actually really sweet 🥺🥺
- “Luxury suits you” “hell yeah it does.”
- I am so fascinated by Ancel and Erasmus existing in the same social sphere, and Ancel wondering why Erasmus doesn’t use the fact he’s beautiful for power, and dammit I’m going to have to write that fic, aren’t I? 😭
- Ancel and Berenger are mismatched but that’s what works so well about them with Berenger negotiating and Ancel naturally drawing attention to himself. They make up for one another’s differences.
- Ancel giving Berenger fashion advice, and Berenger ignoring it every time in favour of ✨another brown jacket✨
- I’m also liking the implication that Ancel enjoys being a pet and gaining attention for power because he knows what it’s like to be powerless. I personally like to think that he saw Nicaise’s situation and somewhat understood to a certain degree. I can imagine he would’ve been quite young when he started too.
- Fun fact! Ancel’s fire performance is actually reminiscent of a real dance! It’s a Polynesian art called Siva Afi and was traditionally a war dance, except instead of burning cloth on the ends of the baton, there are burning knives. Very cool! 🔥
- Ancel 🤝 Kris Jenner - all publicity is good publicity and I will make billionaires out of a scandal and watch people be jealous.
- The kiss being the first implication that Berenger actually does desire Ancel. Ooh boy, you ain’t hiding that much longer.
- The kiss is also the catalyst for Berenger ending the contract, and I can imagine that Ancel is so confused as to what he did wrong, not realising the circumstances behind the decision. 😞
- It’s absolutely wild looking back on the garden scene from a different perspective and realising that absolutely no one wanted that mess to happen.
- “You’re old.” - once again, ouch.
- Ancel being annoyed at seeing the lords go and ‘coddle’ Erasmus serves to highlight the wildly different appeals Ancel and Erasmus have as pets. Bold and daring vs. Sweet and modest. They would be unstoppable as friends. Shit, I’m really going to have to write that fic now, or read one that hopefully some talented person out there has written already 🙏
- Love that Ancel doesn’t rat Berenger out to the Regent - the Regent doesn’t even want him, and I’m sure Ancel is faintly remembering Nicaise mentioning that he’s “too old” 🤢
- And then the big reveal that Berenger was trying to protect Ancel as he supported Laurent’s bid for the throne; and Ancel realising that Berenger does, in fact, like him. Callback to “isn’t everyone looking for someone to be loyal to?” Sensational.
- I also, for my personal brain rot reasons, need Laurent and Ancel to strike up a bargain by which Ancel listens to all the pet gossip and rats out to Laurent which of the masters are disobeying the new laws of underaged pets or are undermining the new monarchy and union. All in return for a little coin of course 😉
- Ancel and Berenger: what a great little mismatched but perfectly matched pair! Really enjoyed this rendition of pretty woman! 😂
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