#this so. even if it's a small drawing and didn't take that long i'm happy it turned out well!! actually finished it quick enough that i had

[privatebullshit]

with faith undaunted [part 03.]

— ♡

part 03. timidity [3k+ words]

summary: y/n y/l/n is a nurse-in-training when she meets joseph j. toye in 1942, shortly after the attack on pearl harbor, at camp toccoa. she's the americana dream, he's a reckless private. what happens when their fates cross paths?

♡ follow along on their journey of love, loss, and hardship as the story progresses in events taking place before, during, and after the war. ♡

warnings: language, throw up, time period sexism, liebgott (you'll see why), harassment

a/n: pic is not a face claim for y/n! just what her and joe would look like talking to each other<3

song rec: anything - adrianne lenker, bluebird - lana del rey

wfu taglist: @luvrottt @pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @fromjupitertocentauri @annasansh @bluecanvasshoe @catbusloki

previous parts: 00. promo 01. remembrance 02. blossoming

wfu masterlist bofb masterlist

— ♡

Apparently, nearly everyone had been getting promoted today— Joe included, so he sat outside of his quarters with a needle and thread in hand. He carefully sewed the double chevrons onto his uniform sleeve, cursing whenever he accidentally pricked his fingers. Sure, he used to watch his mother sew back at home, but he never quite learned the art of it.

Y/n had just happened to pass by while carrying a stack of medical field manuals, her headscarf fluttering in the wind. Joe looked up to see her walking, hand stilling its movements as he called her name.

"Y/n!"

She jumped at the sound of his voice, fumbling with the books as she looked his way. Y/n looked like she was about to chew out whoever yelled her name, but upon seeing that it was Joe, her jaw unclenched and her brows began to unfurrow slowly.

"Oh, Joseph. Hello," she greeted him with a nod, walking a bit closer. She inspected his uniform top, laughing slightly at his sewing skills. There were long threads askew, visible stitches, and some parts of the patch that were unstitching itself. She took pity on Joe, setting the manuals down as she took a seat beside him, sliding the top from his lap to hers.

"I was almost done," Joe muttered, embarrassment creeping into his tone. It was bad enough that she saw his poor stitching, now she was going to help him with it.

Y/n looked at him thoughtfully for a moment before reaching to pluck the needle from his thumb and forefinger, "Consider it a congratulations on your promotion, Corporal."

She smiled at him, digging her hand into her apron to fish out a pair of scissors, cutting away at the previous stitches. She made quick work of sewing on the new chevrons, making it look easier than words could muster. Joe watched as her fingers nimbly rethreaded the needle with precision he could only hope to have. Each pull of the needle and thread was like a pull on his heartstrings, finding himself completely enamored— even if he didn't realize it fully just yet.

Y/n snips the remaining thread after making a strong knot, holding up the uniform to admire her work.

"Here you go, Joseph," she said softly, a proud smile making her whole face light up beautifully.

Joe swallows hard, taking the top and tugging it on. His ego bloomed at the fact that he was wearing chevrons that y/n sewed on herself, but he bit his tongue to prevent any nonsense from slipping out of his mouth.

"Where'd ya learn to sew like that?" he asked.

Y/n looked to the ground, "Nurse training. They teach you how to stitch people up, so doing it on some clothes is really nothing."

Joe nodded, silent for a moment before speaking again. "Thank you, I really appreciate it, y'know?" he said, thumb rubbing against the fabric on the bottom of his fatigues.

"It's no trouble at all. I'm happy to help," Y/n responded, beginning to stand up.

Joe caught her wrist before she could fully stand, pulling her down just enough to wrap his arms around her shoulders in a hug. Y/n let out a small squeak at the sudden closeness, but brought her arms around his neck hesitantly, drawing him closer.

He breathed in the scent of her, perfume filling his senses and making his mind hazy. But the moment was fleeting, Y/n wriggling out of his grasp and stepping back, grabbing her books once more.

A soft sigh escaped Joe's lips, disappointment striking him in the gut. He understood her apprehension, as much as it pained him to go another second without feeling her skin on his. He was forbidden to let her know how he truly felt, the blossoming, raging feelings for her growing more each day. He wanted nothing more than to say that he adored her so, but the path they chose in life stopped him.

Y/n gave him a quick nod before hurrying off to complete her duty, leaving Joe alone again. His finger traced the chevrons, a million thoughts clouding him at once.

Luz spotted Joe sitting alone, striding over to the man, "Ya look like a kicked puppy there, Joe."

"Shut up, Luz," Joe muttered, scoffing as he stood up.

"What? I'm just sayin'. Every other man in the company has noticed except for you," George laughed, hitting Joe's arm playfully.

Joe scowled, his tough exterior returning, "Notice what? Fuck off with your bullshit, Luz."

George put his hands up in surrender, still looking at Joe with a grin, "Are you sayin' that you don't have any idea what I'm talking about? At all?"

Joe's jaw clenched as he shook his head. He hated being oblivious to his own behavior, but he especially hated being obvious.

George's grin falters slightly as he puts a supportive hand on Joe's shoulder, "You've got it bad for that chick, Joe. It's written all over ya face!"

The taller man rolled his eyes, but he couldn't exactly deny the truth in George's words.

"She's everything," Joe admitted quietly, his usual gruffness lacing his voice. "But we can't be together."

George sighed, nodding in understanding, "I know, bud, maybe if things were different. . ."

Joe nodded in agreement this time.

Had they been two normal civilians instead of him enlisting in the army and her in the Army Nurse Corps, maybe things would've been different— but maybe they would've never met at all then. Maybe.

— ♡

Joe wasn't the only promotion, of course, word of Sobel reaching Captain status quickly spreading. As a "celebration," Captain Sobel allowed the men to have a spaghetti meal for dinner. Joe got his plate of noodles with sauce splattered on top, taking a seat next to his buddies.

"This is army noodles with ketchup," Perconte said in disgust, still helping himself to a mouthful anyway.

Joe chuckled, shoveling food into his mouth. It had been forever since they had a decent meal that was worth going crazy over. Thank God for Sobel's promotion, he guessed.

Well, shit, he guessed wrong.

A loud whistle blew through the mess hall, the sound of harsh footsteps following, "Orders changed. Get up!" Sobel shouted as the men stood up and at attention.

Sobel continued, "Lectures are cancelled. Easy Company is running up Currahee."

The men stood still and slowly chewed whatever food was left in their mouth. Sobel turned and and screamed at the men, "Move, move!"

All of Easy shuffled out of the mess hall, groaning in discomfort as they went to go change into their PT gear. Joe cursed Sobel under his breath, catching up with Guarnere and Perconte.

"That sonuvabitch, I should've known," Joe huffed, rushing into their quarters to change.

"I ate two servin's of that crap, Jesus Christ. . ." Guarnere spat, holding his stomach as if he was ready to throw up already.

Perconte made a face, nauseated by the thought, "Well, don't aim it my way, Gonorrhea."

They ran Currahee while Captain Sobel screamed at them, telling men that they were pathetic for throwing up all over themselves. Joe felt sick, but he swallowed down the warm spit that collected in his mouth.

Luz started to sing to bring back up morale, eventually the whole company joining in, Joe's voice booming as well.

"We pull upon the risers, we fall upon the grass. We never land upon our feet, we always hit our ass. Hidee tidee, Christ Almighty, who the hell are we? Zim, zam, goddamn. We're Airborne Infantry!"

Without a doubt, Joe dragged himself to the aid station after completing all six miles of the run. He found a bunch of the other men there like Webster, Liebgott, Malarkey, Muck, and Penkala. Safe to say, even with a stomach ache, they were enjoying getting fussed over by the nurses, including y/n.

Webster was pretty quiet, but his eyes shone with pure adoration as y/n gave him some nausea medicine, placing the pills in his palm and instructing him to take them with a good amount of water. He thanked her before nearly stumbling over his feet trying to get out of the tent, cheeks and ears pink.

Liebgott apologized for his friend's behavior, leaning against one of the stacks of crates as he shamelessly looked y/n up and down as her back was turned.

"Say, doll, what made you want to join the Army Nurse Corps?" he asked, eyes flitting over to Joe before returning back to y/n's back. She turned around, his gaze roaming over her chest without a second thought.

"First, I'm not your doll, and secondly, I wanted the same thing as you— to join the war effort. Is that a good enough answer for you?" she snapped, haphazardly putting away boxes of medicines for the medics in training. Joe had never seen her so ready to rip someone's head off.

Liebgott scoffed and smirked, pushing himself off the crates to grab her chin, "Nah. The only answer I need is hearin' the pretty noises you're gonna make for me once I get ya alone."

Joe's blood started to boil, taking a step forward and ready to interfere, but y/n handled it on her own.

She smacked Liebgott's hand off of her, starting to scream, "STOP BOTHERING ME!" So it must've not been the first time Liebgott's been there and said things like that. Muck, Malarkey, and Penkala slowly backed away from the tent, the three Stooges scampering away in fear.

Liebgott didn't budge, his shit-eating grin still on his face, "C'mon doll, no one will know. You're lucky I'm even lookin' your way."

That did it for Joe, he couldn't just stand there anymore. Fuck his nausea, Liebgott's behavior made him more disgusted than anything else.

"That's enough, Liebgott. Leave her alone," he hissed, taking a step in front of y/n, shielding her from Lieb's gaze. Liebgott barked out a sarcastic laugh, a cocky eyebrow raised at Joe.

"You're protectin' the broad, yeah? Why? Are you hopin' that she'll let you fuck her real good if you do?" Liebgott crossed his arms, awaiting a response from the other man.

Y/n saw another side of Joe that day too, gasping as she watched Joe swing at Liebgott's face. He had hit the latter square in the nose, earning a pain groaned from him and another swinging fist. Soon, the two were brawling on the aid station's floor. She knew better than to get involved directly, so she quickly fetched some of the other guys to help.

"Hey, Liebgott and Toye are fighting! Can someone come break them up before they mess up my aid station?" she screamed at a group of men consisting of Luz, Guarnere, Roe, and Powers. The men hurried into the tent, two each pulling one man off of the other who were still spitting insults at one another.

"If you dare touch her or say anythin' like that again— if you even fuckin' look at her again, Liebgott— I'll fuckin' kill ya!" Joe shouted, struggling against Luz and Roe's grips, the two telling him to shut up and quiet down.

Liebgott, whose face was fucked up and bloody now, laughed, "I'd like to see you fuckin' try, lover boy. You can have her. No bitch is worth this much trouble."

Joe started to scream at him again, both men being dragged away to their respective quarters. Roe stayed behind, letting out a disgruntled sigh, turning to y/n.

"I'll take care of their injuries later. Are you alright?" he asked, his thick Cajun accent soothing her in the moment.

Y/n nodded, thumbs rubbing on her apron. She looked a little shaken up and a tad bit guilty, as if she threw the first punch.

"Hey, hey, look at me," Roe said softly, dipping his head to look at her face better. Her eyes met his, a slight pout on her face.

"It's not your fault. Liebgott was being a couyon," he reassured her, placing a friendly hand on her shoulder as comfort.

She gave him a half-smile, grateful for his words and respectful touch, but her little smile fell as she thought about Joseph.

"I don't want him to get in trouble," she said, hushed and guilt-ridden.

Roe's brows furrowed at first, wondering who she was talking about before piecing it together, "Who? Toye?"

Y/n nodded, exhaling softly, "He was just. . .defending me."

Roe hummed, "Maybe that's something you oughta talk to Lieutenant Winters about. In the meantime, I'll go see what's going on, okay? Take it easy."

He gave her shoulder a light pat, turning on his heel to go scold the two men and take care of whatever bruises they sustained.

Y/n chewed on her bottom lip before brushing herself off and deciding to head to the officer area, looking around for Winters. Sergeant Lipton spotted her, walking over to see what she needed.

"Miss y/l/n, it's good to see you. You look lost, can I help you with something?" Lipton asked, standing in front of her now.

She looked up at Lipton, lips still in a slight pout, unsure of what to say. She really didn't want to get anyone in trouble; she was scared. Y/n's hands wrung in circles before Lipton reached out to take them in his, stilling her nervous fidgets.

"Y/n, what's going on?" he asked more cautiously this time, eyes scanning over her distressed expression. Y/n leaned in to whisper what happened and why she needed to talk to Lieutenant Winters, Lipton's eyes widening.

If anything, Lipton didn't stand for harassment in the field, or at all, for that matter. He quietly escorted y/n to Winters' office, knocking on the door.

"Enter," Winters called out.

Lipton saluted Winters, the latter saluting him back before telling him to be at ease.

"How can I help you, Carwood?" he asked, hands folded in front of him on his desk.

Lipton sucked in a breath, turning his head, "Go on in, honey, it's okay."

Winters raised an eyebrow, putting it back down when he saw y/n enter from behind Lipton, standing beside him. She gives him a timid salute, earning a soft chuckle from the man before he saluted her back.

"At ease, come here, what's wrong?" he asked, motioning for her and Lipton to have a seat.

She explained the situation to Winters, watching as his expression went from relaxed to concerned to angry in seconds.

"Thank you for telling me, y/n. I'd like you to know that we take this very seriously here, and Liebgott will be reprimanded as we see fit," Winters said, running a hand down his face.

"I- I do have one request, sir," she spoke, fingers tapping along the armrest of the chair.

Winters hummed, urging her to continue.

"Please don't punish Toye, he was only trying to defend me. And if you must, just— nothing too harsh, please."

Winters looked at Lipton who merely raised his eyebrows, signaling for him to make a decision. The former hummed once more, eyes going back to y/n's, "I will respect your request, Miss y/l/n. Toye will be given latrine duty for fighting with another enlisted man, but nothing more."

Y/n nodded gratefully, "Thank you, sir, and you too, Sergeant Lipton."

They both nodded, Winters standing up as she did, "Dismissed. Get some rest, y/n, you deserve it."

She thanked him before scurrying off to the women's quarters, ready to get into bed and forget everything else for a few hours.

— ♡

A week later

Y/n had been getting ready to use her weekend pass to go into town for a bit to get some fresh air and buy a few things that the commissary didn't offer. Joe caught her just in time, running to meet her before she passed the gate.

"Y/n, wait! Wait up. . ." he panted, slowing down to a stop as he stood in front of her.

"Joseph," she said, looking at the man with a gentle gaze.

"The one and only," he grinned, standing up straight as his chest continuing to rise rapidly.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, setting her bag down.

Joe ran a hand through his hair, clearly not thinking that far ahead, "Uhm, well, I came to say thank you, y'know, for talking to Winters. And also, to ask how you were doin', I can't imagine what's it like to be talked to like that by a man." He clicked his tongue, remembering the fiasco.

"Oh right, of course. It was only right of me," she said, eyes darting past him, not wanting to make direct eye contact. "I'm fine, thank you for asking."

Joe nodded, his mouth dry with words that he wished to say. He wasn't quite sure how to string a sentence together with her there.

"Right, so where're you headed for the weekend?" he asked, glancing at her overnight bag.

"Just going into town for a bit. . . sight see, go shopping, you know."

Joe nodded once more, letting out a hum of acknowledgement. He wanted to go with her, to hold her hand as they walked around the shoppes, to buy her whatever she wanted with the money he's earned so far. But he couldn't, he had to stay on base.

"Have a good weekend, y/n. I'll see you soon," Joe said, taking a step back to let her leave.

Y/n looked at him, her longing expression causing Joe's breath to hitch.

"See you soon, Joseph," she whispered, taking a few steps closer to him. His breathing became uneven as she looked around before pressing a chaste kiss to his cheek, stepping away before anyone could see.

She turned and started to walk, leaving him dumbfounded as he touched the spot she kissed with his fingertips. Before she passed through the gate, he called out to her.

"It's 'Joe!'"

She faced him and tilted her head, puzzled, "Sorry?"

"'Joe'. You can call me 'Joe,'" he said, a sense of yearning coating over his words like honey.

She smiled softly, "Then, I'll see you later, Joe."

Never before had Joe fallen for someone as hard as he did for her, now standing like a lovesick fool as he watched her fleeting form.

[peridots-pixiwolf]

[Start ID. A dark, warm-toned drawing of Tundra, a robot with bladed legs and mechanical hands both lightened by frost, and a face like that of a fencing mask. She wears a blue jacket with a fluffy white ruff and pockets on the shoulders and chest, a long green skirt with tassels and pale wavy lines at the border, and a brown belt with a pouch at the side. She's shown from the right, leaning back on a stack of pillows and a wooden wall as she looks out to the left, disregarding the open book in her hand, her legs bent in front of her. Under her is a yellow and red rug which pads gritty flooring, over her are series of low, round string lights, providing soft lighting in a room that's partially open to the night sky.]

it's a friend's birthday today yet again... in honor of the occasion here's a Tundra for @automatonknight :]

[natanielkovack]

hii katsuki x shy reader headcannons maybee??

Omg, Yess!!! Thank you for the request, Qyuin! :3

I'm scared of flies... I'm scared of guys...

Katsuki Bakugo x Shy! Reader headcanons ; gn, fluff, comfort.

Ever since the entrance exam, Bakugo didn't pay much attention to you. It wasn't because he was actively ignoring you, you just didn't really talked or participated.

The first time he realized your existence was in the physical testing with Aizawa. It was just a brief moment, but he tried to learn your quirk to somehow beat you in battle.

To him, you were just another extra in the way, another person he had to beat in order to be the N° #1 hero, so he was surprised by your sudden calm and friendly behavior as days passed by.

Of course, he answered with his usual yelling and cursing, telling you to go away and leave him alone. But you never gave up in trying to know him.

Bakugo would secretly keep every detail you give him. At first he would do this with everyone, but as his closet grew full of things he got rid of almost everything... Still, he couldn't get rid of what you gave him.

He would look at you with annoyance when you miss his Monday doodles, silently handing you his notebook for you to draw something small.

At first it feels like a one sided thing... Until you notice how he gives you the bigger portions of the food he cooks for the class, the juiciest parts and the sweetest servings of those cakes Sato bakes.

He knows you're shy, it used to annoy him so much. You would always take so long with talking while handing him something, but now he finds himself looking forward to those clumsy speeches you give.

He's really understanding, but he also understands that you have potential and a lot of it. In class he would tell you to rise your hand when you know the answer, taking your wrist in his hand and raising it for you. It feels like a mini heart attack, but that satisfactory feeling that you answered correctly is so relieving.

He will always follow those with an "I told you so" and a grin before looking back.

Everyone noticed his change in behavior, how he grew sweeter with you. He even knew what you wanted without you even talking... Everyone knew except Bakugo himself and that made everyone so angry at him.

That man is so oblivious to his own feelings.

You can't really tell when your "nervous because of people" turned into "nervous because of Bakugo". Your heart beats faster, you want to be so close to him, you start drawing more hearts and writing sweeter words and oh it makes Bakugo so... Happy?

He thinks that you've somehow infected him with your shyness or something because why else would he blush and feel so warm when you're close? He sees you running away more often, now the letters and drawings just appear in his backpack and he feels his heart missing a beat everytime he sees it.

It takes a few hangouts with the bakusquad before Mina snaps and hits the back of his head, saying "You're more annoying than ever! Can't you see that you like them? Like, you blush and all! Everyone knows! Get a grip!" And he seems to contemplate his whole life while everyone laughs, is that what that was?

He tries talking to you once... Twice... The third time he starts getting angry and there's no fourth time because he decides to do it your way.

His writing is honestly so lovely, a drawing at the end with a heart saying everything he feels. From how he hated you for being like a scared mouse to how he wanted to protect you.

He didn't knew how to look at you the next few days, his eyes darting from you to any other space he could.

When he grows the courage to ask you out you feel like fainting, because why is Thee Bakugo Katsuki asking you out? But you're with him holding hands while walking in the blink of an eye.

He's so sweet and knows when to stop his borderline cruel jokes and comfort you, never judging when you feel so much anxiety for things that are common for others.

He doesn't care that you go speechless when he holds you while watching TV on the common room's couch, it is nice and even you know you'll get used to it... Right?

He cooks for you constantly, he thinks is only fair to give back all you've given him that way.

At first he takes his hand away from yours because of how insecure he is of his sweat, but you just slowly search for his fingers to intertwine yours and the world stops around him.

You slowly grow more comfortable, being more vocal with him about your thoughts and even rambling about nothings. He doesn't ever complain, getting to listen to your voice is such a privilege that he doesn't ever wanna risk losing.

He's so proud to see you growing, working with your shyness instead of against of it, your charm never lost and you're so kind, he could never get tired to see you interacting with the world.

Bakugo makes fun of you from time to time, Joe red you get when he's too close and how your voice lowers when he teases you, you're just too cute, can you blame him?

But he would never be cruel to you, he likes to comfort you. Both of you laying on his bed and hugging, something he would never admit but he loves.

He just loves being around you, you're polar opposites and he can calm down around you while you get more talkative with him.

You're shy, not quiet, at least not around him. And he has learned to be a lot calmer when he's with you, the way his heart beats like crazy balances out that need for constant stress.

A/N: I hope I did good TwT I've read a lot abt Bakugo but I still feel like he's ooc, he's actually really complex! Thanks for requesting, this was so much fun!! (^з^)

Hey! Natan here! ; wanna read more about Bakugo? ; check out my masterlist.

[whoskimii]

GIVE Y𖹭U WHATEVER Y𖹭U WANT !

★ she fingers you ft. yuki ! ★

˖˚₊ warnings ⋆. 𐙚 ˚ smut, pillow princess x stone top, brief mention of strap-on sex near the end, fingering (reader receiving), hair pulling.

˖˚₊ wc ⋆. 𐙚 ˚ 1.1k

“i know, baby, i know,” yuki sighed distractedly, still focused on her book. she knew damn well she hadn't been giving enough attention to you — her pretty baby girl.

you had been all over her since the second she woke up. usually, she would've already been kissing your pretty face and cuddling you, but recently, she had found a book she was pretty interested in finishing.

of course, you weren't used to her not giving you the attention you craved. you had been quite grouchy about it, huffing like a dog to get her to focus on you. however, much to your disappointment, nothing worked. “baby, 'm almost finished, i swear.” she tried to reassure you many times.

a book ? seriously ? you were much more interesting than a damn book. you crawled on your girlfriend's lap for the sixth time in two minutes, this time finally deciding to make a move — you tugged the object off her hands. “hey...” a soft chuckle left the blonde's lips at your pouty expression. “pretty girl.”

“what's wrong, huh ?” yuki tilted her head, attempting to draw an answer from you — although she already knew what was wrong.

obviously.

without even thinking about it, your pretty pink lips parted, emitting a sound like a scoff. “y'know what's wrong,” yuki's eyes lazily settled on your manicured hands, which were slowly trailing up her strong arms, making their way up to her broad shoulders. "you're not payin' attention t'me..."

the quiet words that came from you were enough to make her coo at you. “aw, doll... 'm sorry, sweet girl, 'm jus' reading.” you shrugged at her response. “and ?”

your sassy reaction amused her. “oh, sassy, mhm ?” her hands slid to your meaty ass. “y'know how i get when 'm focused on something.” as soon as she noticed a soft frown appearing on your lovely features, she imitated you. “focus on me.” you repeated.

you were able to withdraw a sigh from your lover once you began grinding your hips into hers — subtly, teasingly. “y'know 'm so much more interesting than...” you paused, taking the time to glance at the book she had been reading. "this book."

she gave you a gentle nod, soon enough followed by a low hum. “you are.”

huh ?

if she knew you were way better than any book ever created, why wasn't she paying attention to you ? at the sight of your confused expression, she chuckled silently. “c'mere. gimme a kiss.” at the same time, her large hands slid to your small ones, intertwining your digits together.

your confusion only lasted a short span of time. with a happy smile, you leaned down and pressed your pink lips to hers. once your lips met, yuki instinctively sighed into the embrace. “i'm so sorry, sugar,” she whispered an apology against your lips. "mhm. 's okay, yuki." you murmured, slowly pulling away.

however, yuki didn't let you pull away much. her hand sneaked around the back of your neck, holding you close. “no, 's not.” she whispered firmly. “gotta apologize to my girl properly.”

once you understood the not-so-hidden meaning behind her words, your plush thighs squeezed together in a desperate search of friction.

“yuki...” her name left your lips in a sigh as she began pressing snug lil' kisses to the underside of your jaw. “yeah, 'm here, sweetheart... shh, don't worry your pretty lil' head 'bout nothing, 'kay ? jus' lemme take care of you, pretty thing.”

the tiny nod you gave her was instinctive. every time yuki touched you, you just shut your little brain off. she always handled everything on her own.

you tucked your head into the crook of her neck the moment you felt her long fingers ghosting against the thin fabric of your pink panties. a damp spot had already formed a long time ago. “already ?” your girlfriend couldn't help but speak with a condescending tone, only to soften again once you whined quietly — you didn't want to be teased, not after fighting for her attention for so long. “aw, i'm sorry, my love...”

a smile tugged at the corners of her lips. “why don't you tell me 'bout your day, little one ? i wanna hear you.” with a hum, you began telling her about what you did — how you painted your nails, what color. “keep talking.” she whispered when she slid her hand into your panties, her thumb grazing your needy clit. “what color ? sorry, baby.”

“pink...” you breathed for the second time, tucking your lower lip between your pearly white teeth. “pink.” she hummed. “great choice, honey.” you shifted, trying to get comfy in your lover's arms. "mhm, thank— ngh..." you moaned when she gently pressed the pad of her middle finger against your entrance. “shh... take it, c'mon.”

at the sweet intrusion, your gummy walls tightened around the digit. “yeah... like that.” yuki slowly slid her finger back, only leaving the tip in. you mewled once she pushed it in again. “be quiet, flower.” she gently pushed your head in her neck, your teeth easily finding her skin. “bite. jus' be quiet.”

as she continued fingering you, you gently bit down on her neck when you wanted to moan. a tiny gasp escaped you when you felt a second finger sliding inside you. you tangled your hand in yuki's hair, giving it a slight tug — which earned a groan from her.

her eyes met yours. she could effortlessly recognize the look in your pretty eyes — the one you always gave her when you wanted her to fuck you.

such a vulgar thing for a dainty girl like you.

“can you handle a third finger ?” she preferred to ask, knowing you usually couldn't get past two of her digits inside you.

however, when you gave her a slow nod as a response, she bit her lip. “okay.” she felt you grip her shoulders to find a semblance of balance. “yuki...” you breathed. “i know.”

once she attempted to slide a third digit inside you, she felt you tense. “hey, 's just me, pretty girl.” she reassured you. with her free hand, she grabbed your hip to make you sit on her fingers. “slow 'n nice. just like that...”

having three fingers inside you — especially yuki's — felt new. “hn— fuck...” you murmured. "feel so full, yuki..." she laughed at you. “yeah ? bet you'd feel even fuller with my strap, mhm ?” the moment the blonde felt your tight cunnie clenching around her three fingers, she laughed. “oh ? someone's curious 'bout my strap, i guess.”

as yuki pulled away from you, leaving you feel empty — literally — you whined. “where you going...” you sighed. “stay here.” she ignored your question.

you perked up when yuki returned. “spread your legs.” you frowned. “huh ?” she laughed. “spread 'em.” you hesitantly obeyed, exposing yourself to her. yuki quickly reacted, sliding a harness on herself.

a soft gasp escaped you — and a pink blush came to decorate your full cheeks. “yuki !” she lifted her head, clueless. “huh ?”

you were in for a long night.

mommy yuki :33

[chimchiri]

hello! I love your art! I just wanted to know if you use references for your poses and if so where you get them (if you're ok with sharing) thanks and keep making great stuff!

Yes! I use references a lot! I'd say about 50% of all pieces I depend on some form of refs.

I am not the best at figuring out dynamic or interesting poses. And using references always gives a better understanding and a nice body flow. It just looks nicer. Sometimes I make them myself, sometimes I google or go to specific sites. It kinda depends. But when I notice I struggle I always go for refs.

When I don't have a specific pose but just the general Idea in mind, I just google "X stock photo" and browse through them until I find one that speaks to me. The watermarked photos are usually big enough for me to use so I never really buy them.

If I already have a pose in mind and I feel I need some help, I either google and or will use aphrite (for whole body refs) or this website (for specific body parts) which name I don't even know? Since I started actively practicing, there's been less of a need for references to get the pose I want properly on the canvas, because I'm better at understanding the body. I still use them a looooot though.

If it's just a small detail I can't get right(usually hands) I will either make a ref myself or take a photo of my partner (he's used to spontaneous photo shoots lmao)

Sometimes I also just need a quick check of how different body parts align and will go look in the mirror (without taking a photo). Like for this one, I struggled while drawing and wondered if I truly understood how the arms aligned. Turned out I didn't draw it correctly initially.

For certain characters I also have a 'face claim' and have a loooot of saved references for all kinds of angles. But I'm not showing those because I don't want to reveal them. I just always make sure it's someone where I can get a lot of photos from different angles.

Vizref is an amazing app for storing and sorting references if you're working on an iPad. Definitely worth the $. I use it strategically for single pieces where I have lots of inspo and refs, or sometimes face claims and my own art of characters so I remember how the fuck I drew them lmao

For things you draw a lot: I also got myself a cheap cowboy hat and foam head for Applejack specifically, since finding cowboy hat references for that specific angle I'm looking for is often near impossible.

I don't like to search for long so I tend to use google + the above for any specific search. But when I practice I love to go to stock photo artists. They all have a large portfolio and a LOT of photos for free (do check their terms of use though, especially when money is involved).

You should check out their patreons because you get A LOT of value for a very good price (approx 1.5$ - 5$). But again, they all also have a lot of photos out there for free.

@adorkastock - A lot of different models and body sizes - Wings! Oh my god those are to day still the best references EVER. - ginormous archive jesus christ -> Patreon -> Website -> Bluesky -> Instagram

@null-entity - Very creative poses, props - a lot of action (imo the best) - also creates quite a lot 360° rotation videos - ducks -> Patreon -> Instagram -> Twitter

@jookpubstock - lots of interesting lighting refs - also wears a lot of suits and cool outfits (love it) -> Patreon -> Website -> Bluesky -> Twitter

TrueRef (not on tumblr?) - High-res photos, honestly insane quality (very professional) - enhanced/more extreme angles/foreshortening - a bit more pricey -> Patreon -> Website -> Bluesky -> Twitter

Whew, long answer! Hope that helps you out! Don't hesitate to use references! As you can see I take them pretty serious as well and incorporate them in different forms into a lot of art.

Happy drawing!

[shadowandlightt]

Snow and Flame -2- |Cregan Stark X Velaryon!Reader|

Following the death of Luke, Jace and his sister return to Dragonstone. What she doesn't expect is to hear from Lord Stark so soon after her departure. His missive only serves to cause her to fall further for the young Lord, and Jace tells his twin sister not to miss out on this opportunity for happiness.

Part One

A/N: Thank you so so much for your support on my first part. I have admittedly not read the books, almost bought them tonight but didn't want to spend close to $100 on the box set. SO I'm really just going off of the show. I'm sure there are mistakes in this, as I am only human and highly dyslexic. But I appreciate the love and hope you enjoy this nonetheless.

The following days are torture for you. You wished for nothing more than to return to the North where you felt oddly safe, so far away from the conflict. Your stepfather, Daemon, made a grave error in judgment and sent assassins into the Red Keep to kill Aemond, only they didn’t find him, instead killing Aegon’s son, Jeahaerys. The smallfolk started to call your mother a kinslayer and cruel. Though you know she would never order such a thing. 

“Princess, a raven for you.” 

You hum and hold your hand out for the missive, spotting the Stark sigil. A smile spreads across your lips. You can’t help but look around to see if anyone is paying attention to you before you unfurl the scroll. 

Cregan’s handwriting fills your eyes, talks of how he already misses your presence and how sorry he is about your loss. He writes of the summer snow, slowly starting to thicken as winter draws closer. How despite the cold, you might even enjoy Winterfell in it’s natural season. 

The thought of him thinking of you in his home makes heat stir in your belly. You clutch the letter close to your chest, remembering how jealous you were when he and Jace swore oaths to one another and sealed them in blood. 

You thought it unfair that you were excluded. You could understand it now though, why you weren’t allowed. They swore an oath of brotherhood, and you didn’t think of Cregan as a brother. Not with the way desire built up within you during your stay at Winterfell. 

“What are you doing, sister?” Jace calls from your doorway. 

“Jacaerys,” You stand quickly, shoving the missive behind your back, “I didn’t hear you come in.” 

“Yes, I could tell,” He smirks at you, “What do you have?” 

“No-nothing,” You shake your head, tucking the paper into the sleeve of your dress. 

“Oh, it is something,” He laughs, reaching for your hand, “Come now, since when do we keep secrets?” 

“It’s just a message,” You roll your eyes, “From Lord Stark.” 

“From Cregan?” His eyebrows raise, “Pray tell, why does Cregan write to you and not me?”

“Jealous are we?” You question. 

“Hardly,” He snorts, “So, what does Lord Stark say?”

You take a deep breath and pull the paper from your dress, smoothing it out once more. You recite most of the missive to your brother, leaving out how Cregan writes that he longs for you to return. Longs to see you once more. It makes your heart ache because you long to see him too. 

“You’re falling for him,” Jace points out, noticing how your demeanor shifts. 

“Hardly, brother,” You shake your head, trying to cover it up, “I barely know him. Unlike you who swore oaths in blood upon your first meeting.” 

He lets out a deep laugh, “You were mad that I wouldn’t let you, so you have no room to speak, dear sister.” 

You roll your eyes, opening a box to put your missive in. The box has a lock and you keep the key on a chain around your neck. It’s where you hide all of your important things. You lock it away, a small smile playing on your lips. 

He thinks of you enough to write to you mere days after you left him. The knowledge is enough to ease the pain of losing Luke. Your chest still threatens to cave in, but the pain is more bearable, knowing Lord Stark thinks of you. 

Knowing Cregan thinks of you is enough to ease your aching heart. 

“So if he asked to take you to wife you would say no?” 

“I wouldn’t have a choice, that would be up to mother,” You remind him, “She wouldn’t likely turn down such an alliance.” 

“We already have the North,” He wiggles his eyebrows. 

“Yes, well, you might as well have married him yourself,” You snort.

He shakes his head, gripping the hilt of his sword. He was older than you, just by a few moments. It’d come as a shock to the Maesters to discover that there were two of you. No one was as shocked as your mother though. The kingdom celebrated the birth of both of you, no one quite as much as your Grandsire, King Viserys. He loved you so. So much that he was blind to the truth in front of him, that his wife, Queen Alicent could easily see. 

You spent your entire life trying to convince yourself that the rumors simply weren’t true. And that you were a trueborn Velaryron, but in your heart you knew. Just as Jace and Luke knew. 

“Are you going to write him back?” Jace questions. 

“Should I not?” 

“Cregan is a good man,” Is his only response. 

You nod, knowing he’s more than right, “I wouldn’t object,” You clarify, “If he wanted to take me to wife.” 

“You’ve never been one for the fighting,” Jace observes, “You’re much like Helena in that way., I suppose.” 

You nod, biting your lower lip, “I hate that we’re at war. I wish it to stop.” 

“You wish for mother to give up her claim?” He questions, misunderstanding you. 

“No, never that. Too many have already died,” Your eyes begin to water, “But…if only there was a way for her to reclaim the throne without all of the bloodshed. At this rate the path will be paved in blood.” 

“It already is,” Jace sighs, “But I understand how you feel. I don’t agree with it, but I understand it.” 

“I wouldn’t want to leave you,” You start, “But I would welcome the opportunity to leave all of this bloodshed behind.” 

“It’s only going to get worse,” He reminds you. 

“My point exactly.” 

He nods and then turns suddenly remembering why he was here, “A council meeting has been called. I was sent to get you.” 

“And you’re only now saying something?” You gasp, moving to your feet. 

He shrugs and usures you out of the door of your rooms. Everyone is already assembled around the painted table by the time you arrive. Your mother, however, is absent. You look around the chambers. The meeting starts without her, word spread that Ser Criston Cole’s forces have doubled, at the very least. 

You listen, saying quiet as they all say a dragon needs to go to war. There is no way around it. Cole will take Rook’s Rest without a second thought. Jace is in the middle of saying a dragon must be sent when your mother, the queen, finally joins the council. 

Jace instantly demands to know where she’s been and a volley ensues. You stay quiet, as you always do, letting your twin do the talking. But even you, in your grief, took note of your mother’s absence. It worried you to no end, not knowing where she had gone or why. But upon hearing she went to King’s Landing, you swore your heart stopped. 

But when she says she’ll be the one to fly to war, you stop breathing. And when Jace urges her to send him, you swear you might faint. The thought of either of them being in danger is enough to send you over the edge. You cannot stand it. Never have been able to stomach the thought. Jace was right, you’re much like your aunt Helena in that regard. 

You’re about to say something, anything to help the fight, when Rheanys speaks up, saying they must send her. Meyles is the largest dragon that you have, and as Rheanys says, no stranger to battle. 

The meeting seems to end then, having been decided who was going to war on your mother’s behalf, you withdraw quietly. So quietly you aren’t sure anyone noticed you even left. You consider it your power, to sneak from a room, or move about the castle unnoticed by most. You’ve always been the quieter one, compared to the temper that fuels Jace. He’s always run hotter than you, ready to act at a moment’s notice. Ready to fly off the handle and do something rash. You’re more cool and calculated, you suspect you’re more like your father in that way. Either one of them. 

You settle at the small table in your rooms and begin writing back to Lord Stark. You find yourself wishing more and more you could return to the North and be far away from this conflict. So you tell him just that. You tell him that you yearn for him as well, and that you were glad to hear from him so soon. You pour your heart into the letter, not sparing anything. You tell him that the war is really and truly beginning, and that there is no avoiding it now. You tell him that you’re scared of it. 

You’re honest with him, in a way that you didn’t expect. And that night, you fall asleep holding his letter. Wanting to feel close to the Northern man. 

News breaks the following morning that Rheanys and Meleys were lost at Rook’s Rest, and that Aegon, the pretender, was severely injured and is on death’s door. Aemond is named regent in his stead, which is more dangerous than having Alicent herself on the throne. Because Aemond knows no end. He will do anything to secure his place. Including as reports say, sacrifice his own brother. 

You feel it in the pit of your stomach, the dread. It fills you as you walk the halls of Dragonstone. The mood has shifted. If the war wasn’t real with the death of Luke, it’s real now. And you find yourself wishing you could just vanish from Westeros all together and avoid all of this. You do not have it in yourself to go to war. Do not have it in you to fight on dragonback as will be expected of you. 

“Where have you been?” Jace questions, brows knitted together. 

“In hiding,” You sigh, closing your book. 

“Obviously,” He rolls his eyes, “I’ve been trying to find you for hours.” 

“Well, you succeeded.” 

“Are you alright?” He asks you. 

“Must I be?” You question. 

“I know how hard this is for you,” He replies, “But we need you, sister. We cannot win this war without you.” 

“You need my dragon,” You clarify, “You can do this without me, but not without her.” 

“No, I need you,” He reassures you, “I cannot fight this without you. I need you by my side, I always have and I always will.” 

“You cannot put this on my shoulders Jace,” You shake your head, “I cannot bear it. The thought of anything happening to you, or to Mother, or our brothers…I cannot.” 

“Nothing will happen to me,” He promises, “I’m quick, and I’m lucky.” 

“And inexperienced, as mother pointed out,” You remind him, “Anyone can be killed. We are not gods, as the smallfolk believe.” 

He sighs and joins you on your seat. There is nothing he can do to put your worries to rest, because he knows there’s a chance he will be killed. There is a chance anytime he gets on his dragon and flies off. He wishes there was something he could do to ease your anxiety. Perhaps he would pay a visit to the Maesters for a draft to help you sleep better. He knows you won’t ask for it yourself. 

“Did you write to Cregan?” He finally asks, seeking to change the subject. 

He notes the way you almost smile, the way your eyes light up a little and your shoulders relax, “I did.” 

“Good,” He smiles, squeezing your shoulder, “I am glad.” 

“As am I,” You admit. 

“Perhaps he’ll petition for your hand,” He shrugs, “Then you’ll be able to get away from all of this afterall.” 

“I’d never wish to leave you, Jacaerys,” You tell him honestly, “You’re half of my soul.”

“And you’re half of mine,” He assures you, “But I would never wish for your unhappiness.” 

You nod, knowing he wouldn’t. Jace might be hot headed, and quick to fly off, but he isn’t selfish. Never selfish. Not when it comes to you at least. He would always put you first, it was his job to protect you and keep you happy. Always had been, ever since you were little. 

He could survive without you, you were sure. But you needed to find out if you could survive without him. You knew, deep within your heart, that there would come a day when you would have to learn to live without him. You couldn’t imagine Jace as an old man, sitting upon the iron throne. You hated that you couldn’t, but it was the truth. 

“I would never wish for your unhappiness either,” You tell him, biting back tears. 

“Should he ask for your hand, don’t turn him down,” Jace urges you, “Be happy with him in the North. Be safe.”

“You’re telling me to leave?” You question. 

He only shrugs and gives you a soft smile, “I’m telling you to be happy, however you need to achieve it.” 

[plumeria1]

Jinx new friend

Masterlist

Note : Jinx and Isha deserved more time together 😢 Hope you like it 😉

Warning : None

Content : Fluff and a bit of angst ? (I'm not sure)

Pairing : Jinx x Fem Reader, Isha x Fem Reader (platonic)

Summary : Jinx is not alone when you come home

You were walking through the streets of Zaun with your head down, a hood covering your hair, passing through the less frequented streets and making sure not to attract anyone's attention.

You held tightly to the bag you had brought, now filled to the brim; it was a bit heavy, but it was worth it.

You were coming back from Piltover, where a small festival was taking place, in the city and the opportunity was too good to miss.

Generally, you didn't go to Piltover often, but today you had a very specific reason: to find a gift for your girlfriend, Jinx.

With Jinx's face plastered on every wall in Zaun and Piltover, you had agreed that it was better for her to keep a low profile for a while.

Jinx didn't always stay in your hideout; she often wandered the streets of Zaun but she made sure not to be noticed.

Jinx hadn't been doing very well lately. Accidentally killing Silco had really affected her. She stayed in bed for a week without getting up. Every time you returned from a trip through the streets of Zaun, she would drag you to bed, lay her head on your chest, and stay there without moving for several hours, allowing you to run your fingers through her hair.

Sometimes her nightmares were so intense that her screams would wake you up. In those moments, you would take her in your arms and spend long minutes comforting her, and often she would end up falling asleep in your arms.

That's why you had taken advantage of this day to give her a gift: in your bag was an adorable all-white cat plushie, and you had immediately known that Jinx would love it.

She was surely going to cover it with all sorts of colors, and you didn't mind at all; you loved seeing her have fun drawing on everything and anything. It always made her happy, and seeing her like that made you happy too.

You descended the hidden staircase that led to your hideout, hearing Jinx long before you saw her.

-What am I going to do now? It's not like I could chase you away, you'd just end up alone. Who would take care of you ?

You thought she was still talking to her voices. It happened to her often lately, surely because of Silco's premature death. But the more you heard her, the more it seemed like she was talking to a real person.

You placed your bag at your feet and removed your sweatshirt, freeing your braid from the hood, and let the air refresh you before joining Jinx.

-Jinx, who are you talking to ?

She turned around abruptly and had a slight embarrassed look upon seeing you.

-Um. I need to tell you something.

Behind her, you saw a little girl timidly appear, who didn't seem older than 10 years old. She was brunette and wore a miner's helmet; her amber eyes never left you.

-Who is she ?

-Her name's Isha, she fell on me. Literally. I mean, I was walking down the street when she fell on me.

You looked at Isha more closely. She didn't seem mean or dangerous. Jinx didn't seem to be wary either, which meant there was nothing to fear.

Your voice softened.

-What is she doing here, did she follow you?

Jinx didn't let anyone else but you and Sevika come here; the only other person who could set foot here without being chased away by Jinx's gun was Silco, but now he would never come again.

-I brought her with me. I don't even know why. I couldn't leave her there all alone. I had to do something.

She really didn't seem to know why she had brought this little girl. But if Isha was alone, it surely meant her parents were dead, because in Zaun, no parent abandons their child.

That's when you understood. Just as Silco had done for her all those years ago, Jinx had now, in turn, saved an abandoned child deprived of her family.

Behind her, Isha continued to look at you shyly, her golden eyes seeming lost, shifting between you and Jinx without really knowing where to settle them.

You hadn't said anything, but Jinx knew you wouldn't chase this little girl away because you loved children and knew what it was like to be alone without parents.

You approached her and crouched down to her level. She backed away a bit when she saw you reach into your bag, but she calmed down when you offered her a candy with a smile.

-It looks like you've just found yourself a new home, sweetie.

Isha caught you by surprise when she threw herself into your arms, her head against your chest, and hugged you tightly. You smiled and stroked her hair.

Jinx looked at both of you, and for the first time in a long while, a small smile spread across her lips. She knew that everything would be better now.

[rosa-tulipano]

one of my favorite fluffy scenarios i allow my brain to fade into during the particularly mind-numbing moments at work... i imagine luigi to be a man who always puts up a happy front. always the fun-loving, optimistic, smiley guy. ever the sturdy-rock therapist of the friend group. but with you, he allows his polished ceramic façade to crack. he doesn't feel as if he needs to keep himself jammed into a mold he outgrew long ago to be loved by you as he does with most others.

he's still learning to be completely upfront with you on his feelings, sometimes he just doesn't want you to worry, but with your constant reassuring words and loving touches he's been getting better and better at it.

"luigi?" the fingertips of your honeyed voice reached out from the doorway to your beloved sat on the edge of the couch, his body slouched forward, elbows digging into his thighs as he clutches his head in his palms.

you don't get more than a sniffle in response before he whips his head up, swiping his hands down his face in an attempt to wipe as much grimness from his expression as he could before cracking an unconvincing smile. "i'm okay, baby"

if his unusual posture and voice- crackling and weak- didn't give him away, his gaze definitely did. his once confident, sparkling hazel eyes were weary and trembling.

the look on your face as you took in the sight of him made luigi breakdown, unable to pretend any longer. "oh, my love..." was all you said as you surged toward him, haphazardly throwing yourself onto the cushions beside him, sat on your knees, to pull his large frame into your chest.

you felt his shoulders begin to shake, his tears seeping into the threads of your cardigan that his fingers gripped. his side was pressed into your chest, your left arm cradled his head that was tucked into the crook of your elbow while your right arm wrapped around him to draw him as close to your body as physically possible.

"that's it, honey, just let it out. i've got you" you soothed him as best you could, laying your cheek against his hair, smoothing your hand up and down the panes of his broad back, letting the fingers of your left hand dance across his cheek as you whispered sweet nothings into his curls.

after a while, his body wracking sobs were replaced with intermittent hiccups and long sniffles. he pulled away just a little, but you didn't let him get far. you cupped his face gently in your palms, tilting his face up a bit to look up at you. his eyelashes fluttered with remaining moisture, the last couple teardrops tumbling down his cheeks. you kissed them away softy as they crossed his beauty marks.

the tenderness with which you held him made luigi want to cry even more. he's never felt more safe and loved than he does with you.

your caress your thumb over one cheek while your other hand pushes his hair back from his forehead. with his tears finally subdued, he can clearly see you now. the way your brows furrowed ever so slightly as you tried to dab away the stray tears on his jawline and neck with the sleeve of your cardigan, the weight of worry in your eyes as you peppered pecks all over his face, the twitch of your lip as you internally debated whether or not to ask him what happened.

luigi hated showing his "unsavory" emotions around most others. but you took those very emotions and held them dear to you. nurtured them, cared for them, accepted them. just as you did with him. he nuzzled his cheek into your hand, gently wrapping his fingers around both of your wrists before placing a kiss against each of your palms. with each meeting of rosy his lips against your supple skin, he stayed like that for a few seconds just taking in your warmth before covering your fingers with his own and pressing your hands even further into his cheeks.

you cracked a little smile at his loving actions, unable to stop yourself from giving a quick peck to his flushed nose. he huffed a small air of laughter, using your fingers to cover his eyes.

"feeling better now?" you whispered, moving your hands to capture his own between him, pulling them from his face and into your lap where you smoothed over them.

he nodded aggressively, keeping his eyes shut for a few beats longer before he looked at you, "loads" he murmured, a content smile lazily drawing up the corners of his mouth as his puffy eyelids drooped

"you wanna talk about it?" you tried a bit apprehensively, trying to look for any hesitation in his tired eyes.

a sharp breath was drawn through his nose as he leaned all the way back suddenly, tossing his head to hang off the couch. you gave him a while to compose his thoughts and he ran his hands over his face a couple times, turning your own hands' attention to the wrinkles in his flannel as your brain tried to think of what could've happened.

as soon as he shuffled a bit, your eyes were back on his face. "hm, maybe later," he started before wrapping his arms around you and pulling you in to straddle his lap. his arms were tight around your waist as he leaned back again bringing you to lay over his chest. "i just want to be with you like this for a bit first"

you smiled to yourself, pressing a quick kiss to the side of his neck where your face nested, "whatever you want, baby. i'm here when you're ready to talk"

he didn't say anything, just let out a tranquil sigh, letting his body relax and melt into the couch.

you felt his arms squeeze your body against his, as if to say "thank you" though you know that would never be necessary.

my first post on this blog, i hope you liked it! let me know what you think and send me your own luigi daydreams, please :D

[roseareeh]

Take Me To Church | Eddie Munson x Pastors Daughter! Reader

Notes: I have noticed that Christian girls are either incredibly sexualised or incredibly rude in most fics. So I'm here to feed you another version. Enjoy! 🤍

Words: 7.5k

Warnings: None, pure fluff!

Eddie never attended church. In fact, he avoided it like the plague. But there was one day a year he went: When Wayne made him go on Christmas Eve. He said it's "Part of Christmas, and the reason why you get a present in the first place.", so Eddie couldn't argue about that with his uncle. So he sat in the pew, surrounded by hundreds of strangers who all probably felt the same as Wayne. And the situation gave him a little laugh when he saw Gareth in the pew behind him, all dapper in a suit his mother made him wear.

He did have another feeling besides some fun; Adoration.

Eddie first saw you when you stood behind the podium to read the story of how Mary got pregnant and Jesus was born. You wore a white veil over half your hair, that just made your (Y/H/C) locks look even more beautiful. A small blush played on your cheeks, which made your (Y/E/C) eyes stand out more. For the first time, Eddie actually listened while sitting in church. He was so fascinated by your voice, he'd listen to you all day even if you were just reading from the Bible. And when you stepped down from the podium, your red, long skirt did a small bounce with every step you took. How has he never noticed you before? You must be around his age, and Hawkins High was the only school in town.

His eyes kept wandering over to you, watching how you sat next to the preacher with a woman that looked an awful lot like you. Is that your mother?

He heard your angelic voice again when you made the announcements at the end. Again, he listened closely to your beautiful voice, even if the information given didn't matter to him. He left church happy, for the very first time. And with actually knowing the story of Jesus for the first time in his life.

When everyone returned to school after the holidays, Eddie kept an eye out for you. It only took him until his third period to see you walking into his world class. How has he never noticed you before? Sure, you dressed pretty modest and not in a way that would draw attention. But your face. How could he never see your beautiful face? Now that you had your hair up in a ponytail, he could see your pretty features even better. And he knew it had to be you when he saw the gold cross charm hanging on your necklace.

He had to admit to himself that he had an immediate crush on a church girl. Out of all people.

But how would be talk to you? There is no way that you'd actually wanna hang out with him. But faith, or maybe even God himself, played into his hands that day when the teacher announced a partner project. She put teams together by drawing names from a bowl.

"Edward Munson and (Y/N) (Y/L/N)." You looked up in an attempt to find Edward. You've never heard his name before, but quickly saw him when he gave you a small wave. Once you two pushed your tables and chairs together, the teacher announced the assignment: a presentation about a historical figure from any country and time. That sounds fun!

Everyone in class started chatting, and so did you. "Do you have an idea?" Honestly, Edward looked a bit lost. "So, I was thinking maybe Amelia Earhart or Harriet Tubman. Unless you have any ideas, of course." You are so nice and chirpy, Eddie thought. How adorable.

"I know embarrassingly little about historical figures.", he admitted. But despite that confession, you still smiled. "That's okay, we all have our interests. I really enjoy reading about women in history, so I can give you some suggestion and we can choose together." How were you so kind? It amazed him.

You took your notebook out and wrote down a few names, then turned it to show him. With a lot of patients, you gave him a quick rundown of every woman in history you could report about. From Joan D'Arc, to Queen Elizabeth I, all the way to Anne Frank. He appreciated your patience, and getting to listen to your sweet voice was a nice bonus. In the end, the two of you agreed on Mary, Queen of Scots.

"I have a few books on her, maybe you can come over after school?", you suggested in a chirpy tone. How are you so nice? "Just, uhm...maybe see what you wear. I think it's up to you to wear what makes you happy, but my dad is a pastor, and I don't want you to feel uncomfortable." Eddie looked down at his Hellfire Shirt and the pins in his jean jacket. "I'll find something else, I think.", he said with a slight grin. How adorable was it that you warned him. "But he'll like your ring.", you said with a giggle while pointing at the thick, cross-with-skulls ring Eddie had on his pointer. "Oh yeah?", he said with laughter laced in his voice. "You like it, too?" You giggled at that. "I think I do." You leaned foward a bit. "Yeah, it's pretty!"

When he left class that day, he's never felt happier. He didn't know projects could actually be fun. You two agreed to meet the next evening at your house for the project and dinner. Eddie truly has never been more excited to eat at somebody elses home.

"Good evening.", he greeted the woman that opened the door. It was the same woman who sat next to you in church, so he figured that she was your mother. He didn't notice her pregnant belly last time, but now he did. "Good evening, you must be Eddie." Her voice was just as calming and relaxed as yours. Now he knew where you got it from. "Yeah, I'm here to do the project with (Y/N)." She nodded and hurried him inside before giving him a pair of single-use slippers.

"Honey, your friend is here!", your mother yelled upstairs. He heard some footsteps coming downstairs at a quick pace, then you stood before him. "Hey Eddie.", you chirped. "Dinner's ready in 30 minutes, show him around in the meantime.", your mother advised before walking back in the kitchen. You nodded and started showing him around. The living room was massive, and he was a bit confused once he saw 12 chairs at the large dining room table. It all made sense when he saw pictures upon pictures of your family hanging next to the stairs. "You have a lot of siblings.", Eddie commented while taking a look. Since this was a pretty normal reaction, you giggled a bit. "I have 11 siblings, and mum is having number 12 soon." He actually stopped in his tracks. In some way, he assumed there were a few uncles and aunts in the family pictures. Those were all your siblings?! And you saw his surprised face, so you took a picture down and sat on the stairs with him. It was one you took at your youngest brothers baptism last year. "So the baby is Isaiah. He's a bit over a year old right now." And that's how he learned all your siblings names, ages and that three of your eldest brothers and sisters stayed in Arkansas which he also now knew you were originally from. "Oh, I'm sorry, I tend to be a chatterbox. I didn't ask, do you have siblings?" He barely recovered from the infodumping, which made him fumble over his words a bit until he found then again. "No, I'm an only-child.", he mumbled while scratching his neck in embarrassment. "I live with my uncle." To you, that was fascinating. You never heard about that. "Is it nice?", you kept asking curiously. He huffed out a laugh. "Yeah, Wayne is cool.", he simply said. It didn't seem like he wanted to talk about his family much, so you let it be. "I'll show you my room!", you said excitedly while getting up. He was infatuated by how excited you were about everything. How can a person be this happy all the time? And why did it make him happy to simply be in your presence, aside from your beauty?

Your room was very prim and proper. What stood out were the multiple crosses in various sizes, styles and colours hanging above your bed. "You're very religious, aren't you?", he joked. "Can you tell?", you giggled. He had another look around and saw your overstuffed bookshelf. "That are the books I told you about." With ease, you pulled out three books. "We'll need those later.", you mumbled while putting them on your desk. "Oh, I'm assuming we'll do the project in the dining room because I can't have boys in my room for too long." He may have judged a bit with any other girl, but when you said it, it was adorable. When you looked over at him, there was this dreamy look on his face. Eddie looked...really cute like this. It made your stomach feel a bit tingly.

"Dinner's ready!", you two heard from downstairs. That snapped you out of your funny feeling, and you walked downstairs with Eddie. He could smell the food already, and honestly didn't know how hungry he was until that moment. And then, his stomach audibly grumbled once you two sat down next to each other. All of your siblings living in the house either came running along or were carried by another family member to be put in their high chair. He noticed that your father wasn't there, but he might just be caught up at work. Although he was still glad he picked an AD/DC shirt, since your mother was just as Christian.

Overall, it was unusual to Eddie, from the harmony going on to the sheer amount of people in this house. It really didn't look that big on the outside, where were all these rooms?

"We pray before we eat.", you whispered to him while taking his hand and that of your sibling sitting on your right. Even though it was just for praying, he loved holding your hand. And then it happened; his crush on you was settled.

Eddie couldn't stop thinking about that day. You were so sweet to him, although you had every reason to be mean like the basketball guys. And now, whenever you walked into class, you gave him a wide smile. Except today, where you walked up to him. "Hey, do you wanna eat lunch together? My mum packed me some extra." He loved the food your mother cooked last time, how could he say no?

You two sat at a table, seperate from both your usual peer groups. "Some Mac n' Cheese and home-made bread with home-made butter.", you said with your signature smile while sliding the two plastic containers over to him. "Does she always cook from scratch?", he asked while opening the food. You nodded as you picked up a fork-full of mac n' cheese. "Pretty much. I don't really remember not seeing her do it herself, except when I got a new sibling. Then the oldest usually orders takeout, so our parents don't know." The way you giggled as this, like it was the worst thing you could think of doing behind your parents back, was adorable. You're so innocent and pure, the complete opposite of him. "So you get to order takeout with this baby?", he asked after swallowing a bite from the bread and butter. Again, you giggled and squealed a bit. "I do! I'm so excited!" Eddie couldn't help but laugh at your adorable antics. "I'm going to get pizza for everyone, I love pizza." Honestly, he'd get this excited over pizza, too. All this excitement made you a bit irrational - you've been thinking a lot about why being with Eddie made your stomach tingle. It just didn't make sense, what would make you feel so funny? "Do you maybe wanna come over for dinner again? Even without the project?"

"I would like that.", he replied. "Promise I put on my most Christian clothes." You looked down at the shirt he was wearing, which read 'Black Sabbath' in bold letters. "Yeah, my dad might think it's a bit...controversial.", you agreed. It still surprised him that it didn't bother you enough to a point where you'd eat lunch with him. "Maybe tomorrow? If that's fine with you."

It was more than fine with him. He may even had a little skip in his step when he walked up to your house the next night. It was a bit more chaotic this time, with some toys laying in the front yard. Your father opened the door for him this time, but he gave you just as much of an inviting smile as your mother did last time. "You must be Munson's kid.", he said while making space for him in the doorway. How did he know him? "I am, sir.", Eddie replied before stepping in. It didn't take long for him to hear squealing kids and laughter from every corner. "(Y/N) is in the living room, I assume you know the way."

The second he turned the corner, Eddie saw you with a child on your hip. You looked beautiful like this. "Hi Eddie!", you said in a happy tone. "Look Isaiah, Eddie's back!" Against his expectations, the toddler grinned when he saw him. "I'm glad you're here. Mum's not feeling well, so dad is making dinner tonight and I'm helping with the young ones. I hope you don't mind." He shook his head no before looking around and seeing all the toys laying around. "I don't mind kids.", he stated while you two sat down on the couch. At least he wanted to, until a loud "BAA!" came from underneath his butt. Eddie jumped up to see the stuffed lamb he accidentally sat down on. Both you and your brother giggled. "Sorry, that's Isaiahs.", you giggled while taking it away. Reluctantly, he sat back down on the couch while watching you tickle your brothers nose with the lamb. It was adorable to witness.

"What's with Christians and lambs?", he blurted out. He saw so many lambs in your house and whenever he drove by church. Especially during Easter time. But that question made you happy, you loved talking about your religion!

"John the Baptist called him the lamb of God, because he came down to die for our sins. Kinda like a sacrificial offering." Eddie didn't even know who John the Baptist was, but he was just happy to see you talk in such a chirpy tone. He was quickly pulled out of his thoughts my your siblings running downstairs while screaming.

"Hey, turn it down! Mum is sleeping!", you scolded the three kids. Even while telling them off, your voice remained soft. "I wanna see mommy!", the girl said with a pout. "I know Hannah, but she's exhausted from growing another baby.", you explained to her. She waddled over and sat down next to Eddie with a curious look. "You're back.", she said with big doe eyes looking up at him. "Why do you have hair like a girl? Do you wanna be a girl?" Her tiny hands reached out to touch his hair, but you leaned over to scold her again. "Hannah, we don't judge people. That makes God unhappy." Now he knew why you haven't judged him once. "We talked about this."

Hannah grumbled and crossed her arms before her chest before walking off with a huff.

"She's quite the character.", Eddie chuckled. Honestly, he loved getting to know your family better. There wasn't much chance for it last time. "I love her to pieces, but she's in an exhausting phase right now." At least Isaiah was contempt in your arms with his stuffed animal. "Makes me question if I actually want that many kids, honestly."

"Do you want that many?", Eddie asked, a bit shocked. You giggled at his surprised expression. "Not 13. Maybe 5 or 6." That was still a lot, although less than half of what your mother went through. "Do you wanna have kids?" He sighted and leaned back against the couch. "I don't know...maybe. I don't have much experience with babies." You bit the inside of your cheek while watching him. Why did his eyes show some sort of fear. "Here, hold him.", you said. Eddie couldn't even protest before you plopped your baby brother into his arms. "That's your experience, congratulations." Isaiah looked up at Eddie and cooed before leaning against his chest. It was adorable, honestly. "How does it feel?" Instinctively, he started stroking your little brothers head with one hand while the other one was on his back to avoid an accident. "You're witty.", he said with a grin. "It's not so bad."

"Even a Hannah has her good moments.", you said. "I'm not trying to convince you or anything, but I'm just saying that kids can be a blessing." Did you actually try not to convince him? Why was it so important to you that he wanted kids? And why did you feel so warm inside when you saw Eddie with your little brother?

While you were starring at the floor while stuck in your head, he got to see that beautiful expression on you. With your eyebrows a bit knitted and part of your tongue sticking out while thinking. Did you always do that? Did he just never notice before? How adorable.

"Dinner's ready!", your father yelled from the dining room. Eddie got up with you, brother in arm, and walked right behind you.

"That's not what I usually listen to.", Eddie said in a chuckled tone while looking through your vinyl collection. It mostly consisted of Keith Green, Petra and 2nd Chapter of Acts. "What do you listen to?", you asked curiously while standing behind him. From his shirts, you knew a bit but not everything. He turned around to face you, and accidentally very closely so. Did he always smell this good? Did you always look this cute?

"Oh, uhm...", he started stuttering. "Like, uh...Metallica, for example. Or Iron Maiden, and Aerosmith." You listened, and looked fascinated while doing so. Considering your family and what he saw in your music collection, this probably felt like discovering a whole new universe. "Can you show me some time?", you asked in a sing-song voice. He let out a small laugh and scratched his neck. "Sure, uhm...maybe after school tomorrow? I can drive you home if you want." You nodded in agreement. "That sounds lovely, Eddie."

You couldn't sleep that night. All that was running through your head was Eddie driving you home. Why did it feel so exciting? Why did he feel so exciting? No amount of tossing and turning, praying or reading your bible helped making you sleepy.

You groaned into your pillow and got up again to find anything to do. But your room was clean, you couldn't even concentrate on a simple prayer and you finished your homework.

The slippers helped with quieting your steps while sneaking downstairs. Maybe some warm milk and honey would help. Although your mother standing in the middle of the kitchen scared you a bit and made you yelp out. "I'm sorry, honey.", she quickly apologised. "Why are you up?"

"Why are you up?", you asked back. It wasn't until then that you saw the plate of leftovers on the kitchen counter. "Growing a baby makes a woman hungry at the oddest times, honey." You giggled a bit before walking to the fridge and getting out milk. "I can't sleep, my head won't stop thinking." She leaned against the kitchen counter with the plate in her hands. That was your mother - she knew something new was rattling in your brain. "Thinking about what? Or who?" She hit a bulls eye with the who. While putting a cup of milk in the microwave, you started telling her all about your thoughts. That ever since Eddie offered to drive you home, you couldn't stop thinking about him. How you noticed that he smelled nice, and you wanted to get to know more about him for no apparent reason. That you thought the curiosity you felt wasn't about that he lived much differently than you, but more about him as a person. Once you were done with your talking and finished your milk with honey, she couldn't help but chuckle.

"I felt that way about a boy too when I was your age.", she said with a half-full mouth of food. That made you peak up in interest. "What did you do?"

"I'm currently having his 13th baby."

Were you in love? It would explain why you didn't know this feeling yet. With being at church your entire childhood and having only girl-friends, it made sense. "It's called having a crush, honey. It was ought to happen to you, and it's nothing bad. It can be really nice, actually." It didn't feel much nice when you couldn't sleep, but it felt good when your stomach tingled. "Is it like love?", you asked curiously. Your mother chewed on her noddles while thinking. "Not necessarily. But it can turn into love." With a hum, you started drinking your milk and thinking about her words.

"I saw the way he looks at you, honey. Try to find a good moment to tell him. You might regret it if it's to late." She kissed you on your forehead and smiled. "Go to bed, pray about it, find your inner strength. You have a lot of it."

"I don't think dad would like him very much...in the long run.", you confessed. Eddie was not who your father wanted for you. If it all went according to him, you'd marry someone from your church, who would listen to Keith Green with you while doing puzzles. A nice Christian boy. But you doubted that Eddie was even baptised. "Let me handle your father. I know a few tricks."

"That's so loud!", you squeaked while Eddie drove out of the parking lot. Currently, Iron Maiden was booming out of his speaker as he drove you home. "A good loud?", he asked with a grin. It was adorable whenever you were excited. "Yes, a good loud!" You were practical bouncing in your seat to the music. "I didn't think I'd like that!" It hit every part in your brain just right to satisfy you. You knew you couldn't listen to this at home, and maybe the lyrics weren't exactly biblical, but it tingled in your brain just right.

Meanwhile, Eddie watched you from the corner of his eye. Your bouncing, your giggling, the wide grin, yoir squealing. Everything about it was adorable. You were adorable. Who knew someone could look this adorable while listening to music about slaughtering humans?

"If you like this, you're really gonna like Metallica.", he said with a chuckle.

"It gets better?!"

Eventually, Eddie parked in your driveway and turned off the music. While picking up your bag from the foot well, you saw a magazine laying there. "What's that?", you asked. The first thing you saw was the word 'Satanic' in bold, red letters, then that it was a Newsweekly. You picked it up from the ground and skipped over the pages to find the article advertised on the cover. "Oh, that..." This might be the moment he fucks this all up. You enjoying being around him, your cute giggles and adorable grin. "We read it in our club...it's kinda..."

"Dungeons and Dragons?", you asked, bit confused. The article explained that it was a satanic game, made to infiltrate American kids and how it depicted satanic rituals, the devil, torture and murder. It took you a while, but you eventually put two and two together. "Is that what you do in your club?" There was some upset in your voice, but it was more of a sad one.

Is this really the person you had a crush on? This is what he spends his free time with?

"Well, yes.", he said while scratching the back of his neck out of nervousness. "But it's really not as satanic, or whatever, as it sounds there." Eddie still saw your confused look and furrowed brows that read disappointment. You took a deep breath in and closed the magazine. "It just sounds...scary to me." He did understand that. You were shielded from most those things, at least that's what it sounded like from what you told him about your childhood.

"Maybe, if you want to, you can tag along to a game?", he suggested. Your head shot up at that, causing you to look at him like a deer in headlights. Eddie could see how unsure you were just by looking into your eyes. Naturally, it scared you. Once you read the wors 'Satanic', it was ought to scare you off. Your dad was a pastor, after all. Meanwhile, he also remembered what you told your younger sister: "We don't judge people, that makes God unhappy.". That wad basically what he held on to right now.

"Maybe you can change my mind.", you said with a small smile. After all, you had a crush on him. Why shouldn't he able to show you what he enjoyed? "I could tag along next time your club me-" You got cut off by your own words. How would you explain it to your parents? Should you...lie? But that's not allowed, isn't it?

Meanwhile, Eddie was confused by your sudden quietness. He understood what you were going for, but it didn't seem like you wanted to finish your sentence.

"I would like to have you at the next campaigns.", Eddie said with a small smile. You nodded quietly and finally grabbed your bag. "I'll ask if I can.", you mumbled. Honest to God, you were still unsure about this. "I'll tell you tomorrow, yeah?" A small smile played on Eddie's lips at your words. "Alright. I'll see you tomorrow then."

"Thanks for taking me. And showing me your music." Regardless of everything he just told you, you still smiled at him before leaving the van.

You did make a decision, and told a small lie to your parents. Or at least not the entire truth. They thought you stayed longer at school so you could see what Eddie's club was up to, but left out the details of the exact game. When they questioned you, you just told them they'd he playing a board game.

So there you were, sitting between Eddie and Gareth while watching what the group (or how Eddie said they call it, Party) was doing. The story went that they, or their characters, were in a town called Saltmarsh and had to find out the secret of an abandoned house. For the first 30 minutes, you quietly watched and listened. Until they all got on a boat and Eddie started talking about the monsters appearing. He set down a figurine on the board, but that one simply confused you. Especially with everyone else being upset by seeing it.

"Whats that?", you asked curiously with knitted brows. "That's a dragon turtle", Gareth said, like it was obvious to you. It was, in fact, not. "Dragon...turtle?" Does it spit underwater fire? Where are it's wings? "A really big turtle.", Eddie said, knowing it was the easiest way for you to understand. "Oooh.", you said quietly. Now you see it. Everyone around the table laughed, until Eddie said their ship was wrecked by said Dragonturtle. That's when the laughter died down, and rather quickly at that.

It got even worse when Sirens appeared. You only knew about mermaids, so the concept of Sirens confused you a bit. But you understood the idea rather quickly.

And unfortunately for Gareth, his character got lured in by them. "Why me?!", he yelled in an upset tone while looking absolutely lost. "That's what lust gets you.", you commented, which made Eddie burst out laughing. You didn't know that he had Gareths character be lured in because he was actually the biggest horndog of the entire group, which made your words even funnier.

For whatever reason, your questions and absent-minded comments made the entire campaigns funnier for everyone. It showed Eddie that you actually enjoyed DnD, even though he saw you clutching your cross necklace every one in a while. Later in the car, you were grinning from ear-to-ear.

"Someone had fun.", he said while buckling his seatbelt. "That was so much fun!", you squealed. "I could've watched even longer! That was not what I was expecting!"

Your expression was adorable. He could kiss your pretty face just from looking at you like this. "Maybe we can find a campaign you'd like.", he suggested. That made your face light up even more. "You'd do that for me?"

Eddie would do just about anything for you at this point. He had to face that his crush was growing into falling in love. How could he not?

"Sure, if you want.", he started the car and drove to your house. His plan was to make a campaign just for you and have everyone tag along, but you didn't need to know that yet.

You kept going on and on about how much fun you had, and that you didn't understand the article from Newsweekly. But your words abruptly stopped when you saw your dad's car missing in the driveway. "What's wrong?", Eddie asked you. You've seen this scenario many times before, at this point it could only mean one thing if both cars were gone by this time. Plus, you knew he didn't work late today. "Mom's having the baby.", you mumbled. He couldn't bring anything out but an "Oh."

"It's fine. I'll get in and see how the kids are." You smiled at him while opening the passenger door. "See you tomorrow! Thank you for today!"

But he didn't see you tomorrow. You didn't come to school, or the day after. Maybe something happened with your mother? Eddie decided to drive over to your place after his second period. When you opened the door, you looked beyond stressed. Hair in a messy ponytail, baggy clothes and worn-out slippers. "Oh thank God, Eddie.", you groaned in relief. "Can you help me, please?"

He came inside to see a mess in the living room. Toys scattered everywhere, snack packaging on the floor and crumbs on every surface humanly possible. Your two youngest brothers was quietly playing in his playpen, but that was the only thing that seemed to calm you. "What's going on?", he asked in a concerned tone. Your house was always clean, or at least only a bit lived-in, when he was over. Never like this. "I have to do this all by myself, I can't do it." You were so close to tears, holding them back barely worked. "It was so easy in Arkansas, we had my aunts and uncles to help." Instinctively, he pulled you into a hug. You didn't mind it at all, it was just what you needed right now. Some tears rolled down your cheek and into his shirt. Eddie felt the wet spot on his top, but he didn't mind. Not when you were so worn-out. "It's gonna be alright, I'll help you.", he promised while still holding onto you.

"Thank you.", you sniffled while whiping your eyes with the back of your hands.

While picking up some of the toys, you told him what you have to do today. "I have to pick up three of them from middle school, one from high school and three from elementary. Then, three of the girls have cheerleading and two of the boys have softball. Sara wants to go to the arcade with some friends as well, and...oh, I need groceries." Your hand ran over your hair. Eddie put the books in his hand back in the bookshelf and walked over to you. "You pick up the kids from elementary, I'll pick them up from middle- and highschool. But we still have some time, so let's clean and get groceries. Okay?" How was he so level-headed right now? To be fair, he hasn't been stuck like this for over a day. It was all growing over your head.

"I'll get the boys ready.", you said. "I'll help.", he replied. It wasn't an offer, it was a decision. Jonah was walking already and wandered into the hallway with Eddie, while you put Isaiah in his overall on the couch.

You four got the grocery shopping done in no time. There was honestly something about watching Eddie with your brothers in the cart, pushing them through the isles with you. You never understood what your friends meant when they said a boy did something attractive until that very moment. It stunned you, so much so that you were just kinda starring at him when he asked you what kind of milk you needed.

"(Y/N)?", he asked. Yet you kept starring. "You okay?"

"I have a crush on you.", you blurted out. While he looked at you with a lightly shocked face, you covered your mouth with your hand. "I-I...", you stuttered, not knowing how to come back from that. Eddie's expression went from shocked to soft, with a smile playing on his lips. "I have a crush on you, too.", he said. Butterflies were flying around in both your stomach, and there was some kind of electric tension between you two. Should you kiss him? Can you kiss him?

"Sissy, choco milk?", Jonah interrupted the moment. It made the two of you look over at him. His small, chubby arm was pointing at a bottle of chocolate milk. "You have to share, okay Jonah?", you said to him while putting it in the cart. "Can we talk about this again later?", Eddie asked you. Both of you were aware that the middle of a grocery store was possibly the worst time and place. "Sure.", you replied with a small smile. Since both of you liked each other, you were hoping for a good outcome. And so was he.

Once everyone was back home from their after-school activity, you put pizza as dinner on the table and did the dishes with Eddie, you both crashed on the couch. Jonah and Isaiah were playing on the floor while the others either went to do their homework or play together.

"Thank you, Eddie. Really, I wouldn't know what I would do without you." His hand found yours and squeezed it. "I'd do anything for you...because I like you a lot." It all circled back to that moment at the grocery store from earlier. Just him holding your hand made you wanna giggle. "So, when I like you too...should we be...a couple?", you stuttered. As he was about to reply, the phone rang.

"Biscuits.", you mumbled in a frustrated tone while getting up. It was your father calling from the hospital, telling you your mother had a little girl they named Bethel. Finally, another girl. "I'll be home tonight, your mother had a long labour and needs to rest." Of course she did, she'd been gone for almost two days. "Okay, I'll see you then...oh, dad?"

"Yes, honey?"

"Can I...kiss before marriage?" There was some silence on the other line before he cleared his throat and talked. "It's okay as long as it doesn't lead to...more. Why?" How would you explain that one.

"Just wondering.", you lied. You lied?! "Bye dad, love you. Tell mom we miss her."

Eddie's head peaked up when he saw you walking back around the corner. "What was it?", he asked. You sat back down next to him and got comfortable. "Dad called, mom had the baby. Her names Bethel." He smiled at that. "That's nice, (Y/N)." Neither of you could believe that your talk kept getting interrupted.

"I would like to be your boyfriend.", he finally said. A grin spread on your face and a squeal left your mouth. "I want you to be my boyfriend!" He laughed at your excitement while letting you jump into his arms. "I'm the happiest girlfriend ever!" One of his hands pet your upper back while the other stroked your hair.

Eddie couldn't remember the last time he was this happy.

"Honey, does it have to be Eddie?", your father asked. A few days after your mother came back from the hospital with baby Bethel, you decided to tell them. "It's already Eddie, dad.", you said confidently. Luckily, your mother was on your side. She liked him, she saw how happy you were and knew he helped out while they were gone. "I just really hoped you'd find a Christian man.", he explained. "It's gonna be hard for him to adjust."

"He selflessly helped her while we weren't here, he has the right values.", your mom spoke up. "She's happy. Remember how I was when we met?" Admittedly, you didn't know much about her youth. She barely talked about it. But it seemed like that argument made your father quiet down quickly. "He's on probation." was his final word before walking off.

"We won that one.", your mother said with a grin while giving you a fistbump.

You two had a beautiful couple of weeks so far. Eddie made a campaign about a crusade just for you, he introduced you to Wayne and even came to church with you once so far. He seriously thought just hanging out with him made you happy, but you wouldn't stop smiling and laughing after the service. How could you get even cuter?

Your father came around eventually. He told you to invite him as often as possible and started treating him like his own son. The moment Eddie held your sister Bethel for the first time was the moment you knew he was the one for you. You knew you wanted to see him like this, but with your own child.

Finally, you could convince your parents to let him sleep over. Of course they had conditions; no making out, leave the door open, no touching below the hips. It was understandable to you, Eddie needed a bit of time to understand. In the end, he was just happy to kiss and cuddle you all night. So after dinner, you two went upstairs to watch a movie in your room.

He spooned you while looking at the screen, on which E.T. played. Although neither of you really cared much about the movie when you finally got to be so close together for the very first time. Eddie couldn't stop playing with your hair, kissing your lips, holding you close. You're all he ever wanted. But with all this kissing and cuddling, you remember that you had to have a talk with him.

"Eddie.", you said in a hushed tone. His head peaked up from behind you in curiosity. "Hmm?", he mumbled. "I know you might expect some...things.", you started. "But I don't think I'd want that before marriage." Your boyfriend knew what you meant. "Are you sure?", he asked. Honestly, he was nervous about his first time with you. It wouldn't be the first time he had sex with someone, but this was different. This was you. The person he was set on spending the rest of his life with. Maybe having to wait for a while wasn't a bad decision. "I don't know.", you whispered that part, since your door was still open. "Probably. Very likely." His response was a kiss to the back of your head. Although he might bring it up again in a few months; he was glad he didn't have to be nervous about that for now. "That's okay, my little lamb.", he mumbled. "But we can still kiss, no?"

You rolled over to face him with a small smile on your lips. "We can kiss, we can cuddle, most things that don't involve...that."

"You mean sex?", he teased you with a grin. "Edward Munson!", you scolded him with a playful slap to his shoulder. "My parents can hear you.". Your boyfriend couldn't help but still giggle at your blushed face with that tone in your voice. "Sorry, honey.", he apologised while kissing your temple. "But it's cute when you get flustered."

"You said I get flustered at everything.", you giggled. His fingers ran over your waist, tickling you a bit in the process. "Because you do, my little lamb."

"I don't!", you argued back. His fingers dug into your waist, making you squeam and giggle. "Eddie!", you laughed out while he kept tickling you. "Eddie, you're mean!" Your boyfriend eventually stopped tickling you and pulled you back into a hug. "Yes you do, that alone made you flush."

"Because I was laughing.", you said with a small pout. It was adorable to look at. "Sure, honey.", he chuckled before kissing you again. "I love you."

You starred at him for a bit. This was the first time he said that to you; and it felt even better than you ever imagined. "I love you, too." One of his fingers stroked along your cheek while he smiled down at you and looked at your lips. "Good."

Your graduation passed, your one-year anniversary passed, and another one of your siblings was born. Was your mother ever done having kids?

A few days before Valentines day, Eddie came to visit your parents while you were at work in the church.

"What's going on?", your mother asked him while sitting down at the dinner table with him and your father.

"Well, me and (Y/N) have been together for a while now, and I want to spend the rest of my life with her." This wasn't the first time your parents had this kind of talk; it already happened with your older sisters husband a few years ago. "And I wanted to ask for your permission to propose to her."

Both of them started smiling at his words, your mother more than your father. "You have our permission to propose.", he said to Eddie. "But, we want her to marry in the church. You would have to get baptised for that. That's my only condition."

To Eddie, that sounded more than fair. He'd do anything to be with you for the rest of his life. "Alright, I'll get baptised before the wedding."

Three days later, the both of you were out on a date. Eddie was never one to take you to restaurants, but rather to fun places like aquariums or carnivals. That was more his setting, and you were okay with that. So for Valentines Day, he took you to an aquarium. Watching you mesmerised by the fishes, giggling while getting to pet a stingray and squealing when a shark swam over your head was about the most beautiful thing he could watch. Eddie was head over heels in love with you and never wanted that to change. So while you were watching a shoal of sweepers swim by, he took a small step back, pulled out the little velvet box and got down on one knee. "Eddie look, a clownfish!", you said excitedly while looking beside you. Why wasn't he there. With a bit of confusion, you turned to look for him, only to see him kneeling. "Eddie...", you whispered, close to tears.

Unfortunately, he couldn't find his words. His nerves got the best of him, and all he could so is look at you and open the box. You knew him well enough, and kneeled down to his level. "Yes, Eddie. I'll marry you.", you whispered, now crying. With a shaky hand, he placed the small diamond ring on your finger before kissing you. Both of you were so happy right now, so much so that you didn't notice that other visitors of the aquarium watched and started clapping.

This day was one of the best days of your life.

When you sat in the pew a few weeks later and got to watch Eddie being baptised by your father, that came close to the proposal. He was doing this for you. That's how special you were to him - all so he could marry you. So he could spend the rest of his life with you. It made your heart swell, and you were the first to clap once the water was sprinkled on his forehead.

Eddie loved you so much, you couldn't believe all he was doing just for you.

"Honey, before we order the dress, I gotta ask you." Your mother turned the corner of your parents living room, where you both were sitting to plan your wedding. Once you two were officially married, you'd move into a small apartment of your own to spend actual alone-time in.

"Do you want special underwear for your wedding? We can order it with the dress, it makes shipping cheaper." To you, that sounded good and you stood up to look through the catalog. But Eddie realized something in that very minute.

He meant to ask you about having sex before marriage a year ago. He never build up the courage because he was too nervous to do bad.

Eddie accidentally waited for you until marriage.

[blond3ang3l]

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"Keep going bunny. Since your apparently do it so often when I'm not here. Let me see how you really are behind my back." This was so embarrassing to get caught doing. Your boyfriend was gone for almost a week cause of work and you were one to get worked up easily. Unfortunately for you he came home and caught you with your plushie between your thick thighs grinding against it. The soft whimpers and pants that fell from you were too distinct so he knew you were getting close. It was a beautiful sight to him. He wanted to surprise you by coming over and instead he got an even better one.

He wiped the tears that started to drip from your eyes at the overwhelming need to cum, but no matter how much you did it was like you couldn't. Nothing felt as good as him and he knew that.

" Please B, mm help me." You pleaded to the older man. His dark grin only widened as he saw you getting desperate. Usually you'd be so shy, making him turn your plushies away when you did anything, but now you were making a mess all over your favorite one. His large hand grabbed your face with a taunt. His free one went into your drawer that was next to your side of the bed.

The hand on your jaw moved your head up so you were looking directly at him. He took in your dumbed down look. The neediness hiding (just barely) in your glossy eyes. The way your face had a slight tint of red from you being frustrated at not being able to cum. "Can you ask nicely, hm? Ask the right way and I might think about it. You let out a small sob only making him smirk. His grip tightened as his hand moved from your jaw to your chest, lifting up the shirt which just so happened to be his that you wore.

He didn't have to worry about you breaking eye contact with him and moving your head. You knew better. The rough hand grabbed and smacked at your chest making you whine. "C'mon bunny. Why do I have to repeat myself? You want something then what do you do?" He taunted.

Your head was practically spinning at this point. He always dumbed you down whenever he was around. How could you resist? He was everything you wanted in a man. He made all the decisions and did everything for you so it was bound to happen that your brain would turn off around him. "Have to ask nicely." Your answer earned you a smirk from your boyfriend. Anyone else would think that reply would have made him happy, but you knew it egged him on.

"Go ahead. I'm waiting bunny." Your smaller hand moved to his that was still harshly groping your chest. "Please. Daddy I need your help. S' not the same as you. Butcher gave a small hum of acknowledgement before pressing his lips against yours. The gloss you wore getting all over his lips and a bit in his beard. The temporary distraction quickly ended when you felt your vibrator against your most sensitive parts making you throw your head back.

Your legs instinctively closed shut only for him to force them open. " Nuh uh, none of that shit. You're gonna take this punishment or I'm gonna draw it out real long." Your hands grabbed at his arm that he had wrapped around your waist as your hips bucked into the wand repeatedly. Your moans bounced off the wall and filled Butchers ears much to his delight. "H-hah! Fuck, m' so close daddy. Can I cum?"

Butcher gave a chuckle at your begging before turning up the speed. Within seconds you felt your orgasm come over you. Your hips stuttered as the sticky mess between your thighs, on the bed, and on your plushie grew tenfold. Your breaths started to grow shaky and sounded more like whines mixed with pants. He wiped away the last few remaining tears as your legs twitched. "There you go, so good f' me. Lay down okay? Let me clean you up." You have a small nod as he pressed his lips against your cheek. Having a older boyfriend was more fun than people led on..

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[starzgaze]

LOVESICK POTENTIAL: sung jinwoo

pairing: yandere!sjw/reader

UNFINISHED incoherent drabble brainrot on yandere!sjw hahaha... this is so unfinished but it fried my brain so badly all i can do is draw this out later because i cant write for long periods of time 😒 also english isn't my first language so this is really ERRR not good also no proofreading we die raw

tw: froth and nothing much

BEFORE THE DUNGEON EVENT:

This era of jinwoo was so cute he looked so squishy I'm biting my bedsheets. This time is the perfect moment where jinwoo gets his reasons on why he's a little cuckoo over [y.name].

Jinwoo always came home covered in bruises and maybe with a dent in his mental health. I mean not only you face life threatening monsters but you also face the words of your fellow hunters that consists of demeaning and degrading your whole existence does horriblewonders to Jinwoo's mental health! After when his mother came out of the picture by falling ill to the Eternal Slumber, Jinwoo had to face the expectations on becoming the breadwinner and help to keep his family a float.

Jinwoo doesn't have ambitions or anything during this time, not when he's too focused on trying to feed Jinah and pay the bills. He's a blank pitiful slate who's being driven by desperation and the promise he made to his mother to take care of his sister. He doesn't have anyone to turn to and he can't tell what he's experiencing to his sister because that'll make her worry for him! Jinwoo doesn't want his sister to flunk her studies because he made her worry for him... so he's basically alone.

Until you come in to the picture. [y.name] one of the few people who saw him as a person instead of some weak pitiful excuse of a hunter. It doesn't really matter how you meet Jinwoo, whether it be through connections, after a dungeon raid, or you randomly meeting him on the street, what matters is how you perceive him as a person and how you turn his miserable world upside down.

When [y.name] entered his life, it felt like a ball of light entered his dim world but not as if [y.name] was extremely energetic or what not. It was more like that [y.name] ignited something within Jinwoo. [y.name] would stop by and talk to Jinwoo, solidifying his self as a person. They would talk about ideals and goals and even encourage Jinwoo to maybe create his own when they found out that he didn't had any of his own. Jinwoo felt so warm inside whenever he'd spent time with [y.name]. He felt so inexplicably happy.

Jinwoo decided that [y.name] is his goal and the driving force of his ambitions.

Jinwoo limped a bit as he walked towards his small apartment he shared with his sister. It was what remained when his mother was sent to the hospital for falling ill. He groaned silently as he clenched his arm that was throbbing in pain. Even after being recently healed by Joohee, he could still feel the pain of his arm being battered to smithereens.

He wondered how many dungeon raids left till he'll perish by the hands of some low ranking monster.

The young man approached his door before suddenly being called out by a familiar voice. Jinwoo turned around and his bleak mood was changed into a more joyful one.

"Jinwoo! I caught 'ya this time!" [y.name] giggled as they skipped over to Jinwoo, a small mischievous smile plastered on their features. Jinwoo chuckled at [y.name]'s words as he admired [y.name]. He wondered what did he do in his life to meet [y.name]

Jinwoo hoped that the next dungeon raid isn't the one where he'll perish by the hands of a monster.

AFTER THE DUNGEON EVENT:

Jinwoo would probably avoid contacting [y.name]. After realizing he has a new opportunity to get stronger. His mental health before wasn't the best, he often thought he was pulling [y.name] back and has this mindset that he didn't deserve any of the kindness he was receiving from anyone especially from [y.name]

But now? he has now the chance to pay them all back by becoming stronger and become someone they can all rely on. So randomly... he'll just disappear from [y.name]'s life randomly. Jinwoo feels horrible but he isn't ready to face [y.name] again but he promises to himself that he'll meet his darling[y.name] soon.

Jinwoo would admire [y.name] from afar and sometimes do this just for the sake of answering to his personal question of: "I wonder how are they doing now?". Jinwoo is aware how much it hurts to [y.name] that he randomly disappeared from their life without a word especially how worried they were for him.

When Jinwoo finally deems he's prepared and worthy enough to face [y.name] he almost forgotten how different he looked when he last met [y.name]. Jinwoo almost scared [y.name] away when a devilishly handsome tall young man approached them with a bouquet of flowers in hand. Thankfully, [y.name] recognized the man from the slightly meek demeanor he showed.

Maybe after a few more meetups and catch ups, [y.name] would notice the many changes on Jinwoo's overall.. being? like aside from the fact he's now built like a sculpture made by the gods, he's more confident and charming?.. Jinwoo of course didn't miss the way how [y.name] would quiet down and stare at Jinwoo, taking note every little different detail on Jinwoo. This fed the hunter's ego and was proud how his hardwork paid off.

While [y.name] was admiring Jinwoo, they didn't notice how Jinwoo added a few of his shadows into [y.name]'s shadow. His love for [y.name] during their absence has doubled a thousand fold and the lengths he'd go for [y.name] is now boundless. Jinwoo's goal of achieving [y.name] might not be impossible anymore if he pushed himself a bit more just like what [y.name] says.

After meeting up with Jinwoo, [y.name] bid the hunter goodbye as they exited the cafe. [y.name] was pleasantly joyful that Jinwoo didn't forgotten about them and met up with them again after a few years but this still didn't made [y.name] pissed off over the fact he basically ghosted them for a few years too!

[y.name] walked down the cold street that was dimly lit up by the lamp posts around the area. They shivered a bit as they tried to warm up their hands by shoving one of them in their trenchcoat's pocket. [y.name] was on their phone when they suddenly bumped into a man by accident.

"ow.. oh? I'm sorry I didn't notice you there I'm really sorr—" [y.name] stammered out as they bowed their head in apology but then they felt a hand pushing them hard enough to be stumble back into a lamp pole, hitting their back pretty hard. The man reached out to [y.name]'s trenchcoat's pocket and pulling out their purse then he ran away with their purse in hand.

"agh! what the- my purse?!" [y.name] yelled as they rubbed their back to ease the throbbing pain as they tried to run after the robber.

Unfortunately for [y.name] he was fast on his feet and after for a while they lost him. [y.name] panted as they decided to not give up yet and looked around the now lightless and eerie street, it seems like the robber ran into a more abandoned side of the city.

[y.name] roamed around the street and would peak occasionally inside of alleyways hoping to catch the man but much to their dismay, they haven't seen any glimpses or hints. They mindlessly walked around, slowly losing hope until they heard a quick shriek then a hard thump from a nearby alleyway. A cold sweat went down their neck as they froze in place... Did something happen?

[y.name]'s eyes narrowed down on the alleyway where they assumed the sound originated from. They contemplated for a bit whether they should check it out before they decided to see what it was, clinging on the possibility it might be their purse. [y.name] slowly peeked their head in the alleyway and immediately gasped at the sight.

The man who stole their purse on floor, wriggling in pain before a dark figure. Froth was coming out of his mouth as dark inky shadows circled around his throat. His ankles looked twisted but in a very unnatural degree that it looked grotesque.[y.name]'s eyes shakily looked at the soon to be a corpse then up to the figure who was holding their purse. They blinked blankly at the figure.. [y.name] recognized him?!

"Jin..woo?..." [y.name] murmured underneath their breath as the figure looked up to see [y.name] who was pretty shaken up. The light finally hits the figure's and it revealed it was indeed Jinwoo... but he had this soulless glint in his eyes that suddenly brighten up at the sight of [y.name]

"ah. [y.name]" He called out as he walked past the struggling man and approached [y.name] who took a step back away from Jinwoo. This made his heart wrench.

"don't. don't move away. it's dangerous at this time, you shouldn't be alone" Jinwoo continued as he was finally in front of a terrified [y.name]

"you shouldve accepted my offer walking you home"

[secretficblogs]

"First Date Jitters" Divorced David "Deacon" Kay x School Counselor! Reader

Summary: Your date with Deacon gets derailed but you still find a way to make the most of it.

What to expect: 4K words, Light mention of divorce, Canon warnings (hostage situation, robbery, light mention of gore/guns), drinking, descriptions of being cut, flirting, fluff, comfort

A/N: I blushed so hard when yall asked for a part 2, I didn't really proofread btw

You could feel the seconds ticking away as you sat at your meeting. Why did school counselors need to sit in on district meetings, anyway? You glanced at the clock on the wall, 4:47.  Your leg was bouncing underneath the table, a representation of your nervousness. It was your first date in god knows how long. You still needed to run home, change, and meet your date, but you were stuck with what could've been an email. You looked again, 4:48, oh my god.

“Would you be for or against this change, (Y/N)?” Your boss shook you from your thoughts, leaving you to look at the schedule change in front of you. 

“I-I think this looks… great. I don’t have any suggestions.” You slide the paper to the center of the table, glancing back up at the clock. 4:52. 

“Alright well, if that concludes things… I'll let you guys get going. Thanks for hanging back for a bit.” The staff began to stand and file out of the room. The English teacher, you knew her as Jane pulled you aside.

“So, spill! What are you so keen on leaving for?” She rubbed her hands together, leaving you to roll your eyes.

“I’m going out on a date.” You answered, throwing on your cardigan. Jane danced around you and let her noises of excitement draw attention to the two of you. 

“Alright, alright,” you laughed. “I don't even know if it will go anywhere. Just nice to get back out there, I guess.” You rubbed your arm, as you made your way out of the conference room. 

“I'm just so happy for you! It's about time. You have the best time tonight, okay? Stay safe, and call me if you need a lifeline!” She shouted your way as you both made your way towards your respective cars. You thanked her before closing your door.  You made quick work of the dinner rush and ran up the stairs to your apartment. Quickly locking yourself inside, you immediately started changing into the semi-formal dress you had set out last night. You glanced up at yourself in the mirror, deciding a touch-up would do you good. You grabbed out a darker lipstick, one you wouldn't wear to the school. You looked at your phone, 5:19. You rushed to get your heels on and grab your purse, taking one final look at yourself in the mirror. 

“Okay, (Y/N), let's get back in the game.” You ruffled your hair and made your way back down to your car. You peeled out of the parking garage. Your fingers tapped against the steering wheel praying for the light to change. The drive felt longer than it was, and the counselor in you told you to breathe before you left your car. 

David sat in his car rubbing his hands on his thighs, nervously. He recognized you in the car that pulled up across the parking lot. He watched you fix your hair in the rearview, and step out of your car to straighten your dress. David’s nerves were calmed once he noticed you were anxious too. He stepped out and made his way to the door, trying to pretend he hadn't noticed.

You walked towards the door and saw him waiting in the lobby. He met you with a smile and you immediately felt your knees weaken. Together you walked up to the host station and told the young girl the name of your reservation. She quickly led the two of you to your table and took your drink order. You both ordered wine and began making small talk about the restaurant you chose. 

“So did your interest in international food lead to your love for travel, or was it the other way around?” He asked, watching you take a sip of your drink.

“They are not mutually exclusive. My mom’s a professional chef, so I grew up trying all of her experiments. That's how I ended up in LA. She found better business here than Oregon.” You rambled. You couldn't tell where the feeling came from but you wanted him to know everything about you. 

“How old were you when you moved here?” David questioned. He seemed genuinely interested, which you liked. 

“I was 12. I wasn't too happy to leave the humidity. It took a while for my asthma to get somewhat used to the lack of moisture.” You folded your hands in your lap, smiling back at him. He nodded and you could see him commit the fact that you have asthma to memory. 

“How about you, did you grow up here?” You felt he was at an unfair advantage, knowing so much about you from your office.

“Yeah, born and raised.” He nodded.

“Nice, do you travel much?” 

“Not as much now, with the kids, but occasionally I'll find myself in neat places for work.” David felt his heart race a bit at the mention of his kids. He knew the entire reason they met was because of his kids,  but he knew many single parents’ kids scare partners off. 

That feeling quickly dissolved when he looked up from his glass to see your smile. He went to say something but your waitress came over. You both chuckled, realizing you hadn't looked over the menu much. Fortunately, you were both able to make a quick decision and get your food ordered. Your waitress refilled your glasses and left you to continue talking. 

“You said you had a meeting today, right? That go well?” He broke the silence. 

“Oh, yeah, it wasn't too bad. I really didn't need to be there. I was just excited to go home and get ready.” You looked away, shy to admit you were looking forward to your date.

“I’m glad. This is all I’ve talked about all day,” You looked up at him, shocked. “My team was so sick of me that they sent me home early.” David chuckled, leaving you to smile dumbfoundedly. 

“That makes me feel better, I wondered if you'd get bored tonight…” You sheepishly mutter.

“Why would you think that?” David's eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“...Well, I don't have the most interesting life. I mean, you're a SWAT sergeant. I'm sure you get invitations for dates all the time.” You trailed off, taking a sip of your wine to stop your rambling. 

“I don't usually entertain that. I don't really enjoy being hit on. Most people just like the uniform anyway.” He tried to make you feel a bit better. “Also, you're insanely cool. I mean your office is decorated with so many interesting things. I gotta know more about that.” He folded his hands on the table.

“Well, ask away.” You grinned feeling warm from his words.

“The paintings on the walls didn't look like prints. Did you paint them?” David questioned. You began to answer, but your waitress brought out your dishes, set them down, and asked if you needed anything. You both ordered another drink and turned back to each other.

“The portraits are mine, but there are a couple of landscape paintings, sculptures, and trinkets that I got from friends and vendors.” You took a bite of your dish after speaking.

“Your paintings are amazing. Did you consider going into art before counseling?” 

“No, no. It's always just been something I did on my own time.” You gently shook your head. “There have been times where I've illustrated for friends and small startups, but not enough to go full time with it. Moreso just to help out small businesses.” You explained.

The two of you continued asking each other questions and eating in between. Time seemed to stop for the night. The only thing you and David were concerned about was each other. As the sunset turned into a dark sky, you sat across from David, captivated by him. You could tell he knew it, too. He would hold your eye contact for slightly longer than normal, and whenever your hands were on the table, he would make it his mission to rest his hand atop yours. 

The drinks didn't help either. Neither of you wanted to get drunk on your first date, but you definitely felt tipsy. The alcohol made both of you more brave, light touches turned to hand-holding, and your conversations became more personal. You both talked about your parents and how they felt about your jobs. You talked about your time as a therapist and he talked about some of his more significant cases. 

“I tried to be a therapist for the elderly because I thought it would be less pressure. David, I was so wrong.” You laughed, shaking your head. He chuckled as you recalled getting harassed by old men and women for 40 hours a week.

“Deacon.” He interjected.

“What was that?” You tilted your head to the side, confused.

“Call me Deacon. That’s what my team calls me.” He just wanted to hear you say it.

“Well, alright. Deacon.” You smiled, feeling your cheeks begin to hurt. His heart felt like it was about to beat out of his chest. You stared at each other, enjoying just being together. Your romantic staring contest was broken by your waitress dropping off your check. You reached for it, but Deacon was too quick.

“Deacon. Come on.” You reached your hand out, silently asking for the receipt. 

“No, no. I asked you out. And, I'm honored you accepted, despite not knowing me.” He nestled his card in the tin and set it aside, turning his attention back to you.

“I get the feeling you're not going to budge on this, so thank you.” You folded your arms across each other and set them down in front of you. 

“It was nice getting out, it's been a while since I did the whole ‘first date’ thing” Deacon allowed himself to be honest.

“I completely agree. It's more awkward than I remember.” You laughed. 

You and your date continued talking long after your drinks ran out. You felt so warm with him, and the wine didn't encourage you to leave him either. You continued flirting and getting to know each other before a commotion was heard a couple of tables behind you. You took your eyes off Deacon to turn around finding a group of people dressed in dark informal clothing. One of them held his hand underneath his jacket which made you whip your head back to Deacon. His once soft expression was replaced with a look of concern. 

“Um- Deac? I- Do you think somethings wrong?” Your hand made its way to the back of your neck in an attempt to rub away the rising tension. He didn't respond, looking down into his lap. You worked at a school, so it wasn't hard to tell he was texting someone. Your heart raced. It was obvious Deacon agreed that there was a problem.

You were going off sound alone, as the group of people were behind you. You managed to twist your head and spare a glance their way, only to find them talking very quietly with the now frightened host. Whatever they were telling her was scaring her shitless. You felt so bad for her, wondering what she was thinking.

With Deacon clearing his throat you looked back at him, and he gave you a forced smile. He rested his hand on the table, a silent request for you to grab it. You interlocked your fingers and squeezed, letting him know you were anxious.

“Be honest, how likely is it they're here for a table?” You met his eyes, looking for any hint of hesitation. You didn't need to though because he sighed and gave up on trying to hide his feelings from you.

“Unlikely. They look familiar, probably wanted for something. We can't do anything about it right now, so just relax. It'll be alright.” He soothed as he looked past you to see the host leave the group. The group of people looked around, one in particular made eye contact with a woman nearby. The older lady was decked out in diamonds and a fancy bag. The man must have been feeling bold because he walked up to her and held his jacket slightly ajar. Deacon couldn't see what he was concealing but it was pretty obvious it had to be a gun. 

The woman's face fell and the man she was with stood up clearly offended. Deacon's worst fears were confirmed when the man pulled out a gun and pistol-whipped the older man. Other patrons in the restaurant screamed and moved away from the man. You saw movement out of the corner of your eye and turned to see Deacon beside you. He pulled you around the table and pulled you down to the ground. He told you to stay there before turning back towards the commotion.

You peered around the table to find the woman was forced to take off her jewelry and pass over her bag. Deacon raised his gun and announced he was LAPD. You were shocked. He was outnumbered and you had no idea if anyone else carried. You turned your attention to the other group members. One ran out once the hostility started, and two others looked at each other in a mix of disbelief and anger. You took this as a sign this wasn't planned. It also seemed like the group wasn't willing to kill. The man aimed his pistol at Deacon but refrained from firing, resorting to yelling instead. This scared all of the now hostages but only made Deacon feel better. If talking meant not shooting, he was okay with it.

It was hard for you to make out what he was saying, but you could tell he was scared. He likely acted on impulse and was struggling to de-escalate the situation. It's unlikely they knew a cop would be there, especially since your name was on the reservation. A couple of people tried to weasel their way out of their booths and sneak away but that only made the man more upset. His audience was leaving. He aimed his pistol and the nearby chandelier and fired, leaving you to scramble from your hiding spot as glass debris fell around you and nicked at your skin.

 You tried not to think about the blood pooling on your arms and face and just focused on finding cover elsewhere. Deacon had to trust the best way he could help was by keeping his gun raised, and trying to talk the man down. The other guys noticed the situation getting progressively worse and tried pulling him back towards the door, but it only angered the man more. He whipped around to yell at them, giving Deacon an opening to run and tackle the man. 

You were shocked because there was no telling what the other guys would do. Fortunately, the man's accomplices took the lowered guns as a sign to run. Your eyes followed them through to windows as they ran across the street. They didn't get far before police cars cut them off, and they were forced to surrender. 

Hearing shouting, you looked back to your date pulling the man up from the ground, his hands held behind his back. The gun was kicked away, and before long people wearing SWAT uniforms arrived, putting handcuffs on the gunman, and taking him away. Deacon didn't waste any time running over to you and looking at your various cuts. 

“I'm so sorry, (Y/N).” He grabbed the black napkin from the table to press it against your forehead, making you wince. 

“Y-... You didn't shoot the chandelier,” You looked around at the chaos surrounding you. EMT’s loaded the old man onto the gurney. Patrons hugged and made their way to their tables, unsure of what happens next. “Everyone’s okay thanks to you. You called the police?” you asked as he held your hand over the napkin, a silent request for you to hold pressure. 

“I texted a coworker. They took care of getting a team here. I don't think they called the patrol cars though. Maybe the host called.” He looked over your other scrapes, gauging how much medical attention you needed. “I think some of these need stitches…” Deacon looked over to see the EMTs occupied with the elderly man, and some other people complaining of heart rates.

“I still think I’m too shaken up to drive-” You were interrupted.

“I'll take you.” Deacon placed his hands on top of yours.

“Okay.” You sheepishly responded. You let him pull you up and with a hand on the small of your back he led you to his car. Deacon was helping you into the passenger seat when an officer ran over.

“Deac! You okay, man?” The man rested his hand on the open door looking at the two of you.

“Yeah, Yeah. Thanks for coming so quickly, Hondo.” He nodded looking towards the restaurant and the guests funneling out. Another two teammates ran over to you, and the idea that you were meeting his squad set in. You felt yourself sink into the seat, as you looked at the ground.

“Hey! Is this your date?” One of the other teammates asked.

“Are you okay?” Another member asked.

When you hesitated to respond Deacon spoke up on your behalf. “Luca, I knew it was wrong to hope I’d get through this date without you crazies. This is (Y/N). She got cut up by the chandelier, so I was going to take her to the hospital to get patched up.”

“You know you gotta meet the squad family early! I’m Luca, this is Chris, and that is Hondo.” The man explained. You tried to nod along, but the shock and the blood loss made you dizzy. 

“Uhh, yeah yall need to get going. We can do introductions later.” Hondo said, taping his teammate's shoulders. You have him a smile, before waving at them. Deacon shut your door and jogged around to the other side. Once he was inside he sped off, quickly navigating the Friday night traffic.  You occasionally zoned out, putting gaps in your memory. Deacon tried to keep a hand on you at all times to help ground you. He helped you check in, and stayed by your side as you got stitched up. He stepped out a couple of times to take phone calls. He profusely apologized every time, even with you explaining it was okay.

The nurse finished with your bandages and instructed you to keep your injuries clean and dry. He left, giving you and Deacon time alone before you had to head out. You sat in silence for a while, his hand in yours. You felt yourself zoning out again, and Deacon must have noticed too because he spoke quietly, drawing you back to the present.

“How are you feeling?” He rubbed the back of your hand, a concerned expression on his face.

“... I'm hurting, but I’m alive. This is what you experience every day?” You kept your eyes on the floor.

“I usually have a lot more warning, and protection, but yeah. It can be hard to digest and process emotions when things like this happen. Your wounds are large enough to raise some concern for infection too. Don't think you can't reach out… okay?”

“Thank you, Deacon. Know that I'll take you up on that.” Your worries dissolved, finally being safe and patched up.

“Are you ready to head out? I can just take you home.” Deacon suggested.

“And leave my car at the restaurant? I don't have a way to get it back to my apartment.” 

“I'll pick you up to grab it tomorrow morning. Or I’m sure I can have Hondo drive it back for you if you're worried about it being at the restaurant that was just robbed.” He was happy to make any accommodation if it meant you wouldn't worry as much. 

“That’s… really nice. I’d like that- you can just take me home though. My car should be fine.” You blushed, excited to extend the date longer. With a plan in place, Deacon led you to the lobby, and out of the clinic. He, once again, helped you into your seat before letting you direct him to your house. The ride was relatively quiet. The only thing on your mind was working up the courage to invite him in. You worried he would take it the wrong way, or think you were just expecting sex. Deacon pulled into your spot in the parking garage, slowly turning to you. 

“This place is… sketchy.” He mumbled.

“Most apartments in the heart of LA are…” You smiled. Deacon watched as your smile faded, watching the gears turn in your brain. “...Would you want to come in? I mean- like, just to talk. I don’t want this date to end.” He smiled back, making you comfortable by adding, “If you don't have a bedtime tonight, that is.”

“I would like that,” He laughed before continuing. “Annie has the kids this weekend.” You smiled and reached for your door handle. He put a hand on your shoulder, stopping you. You couldn't help but laugh and gently shake your head as he ran around to help you out of the car.

You led him to your apartment, his hand never leaving your waist. You wouldn't have guessed his love language was touch, but it was comforting regardless. You tried to think about the state of your apartment, deciding it was probably fine. You unlocked your door, and let him inside.

Deacon took in your apartment, just as cozy as your office. He could tell you took pride in your space and enjoyed just being in it. The overhead lights were off, and lamps and soft warm light made the living room very inviting. He looked for more pictures on the walls, finding more from hikes and parties. You asked him if he wanted something to drink, and he quietly said he'd have whatever you were having. Deacon was focused on the walls of your home. He heard two beers clink against the coffee table. He soon after felt your arms wrap around his waist from behind.

“You do this with all your first dates?” He asked laying his hands on top of yours. 

“This date wasn't a normal one, and you know that.” You laughed into his back. You retracted your hands and led him over to your couch, where your drinks were. He sat down and grabbed his beer, putting his arm over the back of the couch and urging you to sit by him. 

You obliged, cuddling up close to him. A brief silence settled between the two of you until you thought back to how you met. 

“Did you and Mathew talk more about his writing?” You ran your finger over the ridges in the bottle.

“I did. I think it brought us closer together. He decided to show Annie, too. I think it's helping us understand what he's going through and helps him know he can still rely on both of his parents.” He paused to gauge your reaction at the mention of Annie, but the reaction on your face was happiness—happiness for his son and his family. “It’s all thanks to you, you know…” He took a sip of his drink.

“Ah, it's my job, Deacon. Those kids are important to me, and they all need support from their school. It takes a village, or whatever the saying is.” You furrowed your eyebrows thinking about the countless visits kids have had with you, and how many students crashed your office during their lunch to discuss their feelings. The students who you let nap on your chairs, the lunch program you helped run, and so many more small moments that added up to big changes for students. 

“Well, whatever you're doing it's working. Lila thinks you're great too. Over the past few weeks, they haven't stopped talking about you.” He mentioned.

“Thank you.” You felt uncertain about how the kids gushed about you up around Annie, so kept the response short. Deacon must have noticed because he grabbed your hand. You looked up at him and smiled.

“I’m glad you asked me out.” You said quietly.

“I’m glad you didn't think it was weird.” Deacon earned a laugh from you. “So, does that mean you'll go on a second one with me?” He asked.

“It does, but you gotta pick the restaurant this time.”

The end :P

Taglist? Thanks for the support!

@pear-1206

[2i1han]

Slowly, Then All at Once

4 : try, just for once

pairing: classmate!leehan x fem!reader | word count: 8.6k

genre: fluff, slow-burn, young adult, romcom, coming-of-age

tags: boynextdoor , non-idol au, high school/college au , first love , neighbor!leehan , extrovert!leehan , cold!leehan , extrovert!reader

characters mentioned : kim leehan , park sungho , sakai moka , kim minji , bae jinsol, gyuvin , park minju , jung wooyoung

warnings: no warnings! sfw

summary : you and leehan have known each other for years—classmates since ninth grade, always familiar but never really close due to leehan's indifference. but when his brother enters the picture, everything starts to change. unresolved situation that were once buried begin to surface, and leehan must decide: let go or finally take a chance.

a/n : hi, everyonee! i'm sorry if part 4 took so long. my schoolworks piled up these past few days and i was CRAMMING. but nw since i'll update as soon as i can, and whenever i can<3 happy weekends!

♪ playlist : canna/rio , heavy heart/rio , so let's go see the stars/boynextdoor , so tender/say sue me , bad/wte , light/wte , can't go/ben , chocolate/bol4 , would you love me/stella jang , everyday/haebin , star drawing/yuziii

scrambling your blanket up to your body, you flinched at the sudden voice from your bedroom doorway.

"hey! who do you think i am?"

it was moka.

you exhaled sharply, your shoulders finally relaxing as you placed your phone back to your ear.

"never mind, it's just moka. i'll catch up later," you said before hanging up.

"you freaking scared me," you grumbled, rolling your eyes as you swung your legs over the bed, only to immediately regret it when a sharp, throbbing pain pulsed through your skull.

oh god. hangover.

moka scoffed, already making her way to the kitchen. you dragged yourself after her, each step making your head pound even more.

"you were a mess last night," she informed you, grabbing a bowl and ladling soup into it. "you puked on your clothes, and sungho had to call me through your phone to come save your sorry ass." she cringed at the memory.

"oh. my. god."

you slid into a chair at the dining table, covering your face with both hands. the embarrassment was creeping in like a parasite.

"that's so freaking humiliating," you muttered.

"oh, hell yeah, it is," moka chuckled, shaking her head. "lucky for you, i happened to be at a friend's place nearby, or you'd have had to sleep in your own mess. gross."

"you wouldn’t let that happen." you peeked at her through your fingers, recalling the countless times she'd sworn off babysitting your drunk self, only to always show up anyway.

moka scoffed. "don’t test me."

you leaned forward, fidgeting with your hands on the table. "so… sungho called you?"

"mhm. when i got here your mess on the floor and bed had already been cleaned." she said, stirring the soup. "y'all partied without me. never babysitting you again, i swear." she frowned but still placed a steaming bowl of hangover soup in front of you with the care of a mother bird feeding her dumbest chick.

"it was a welcoming party for my university. are you from k-arts?" you deadpanned.

"no," moka mumbled.

"exactly. don't worry, we'll all go out when we’re not busy." you offered, hoping to appease her obvious fomo.

grabbing the spoon, you took a small sip. the warmth and spice rushed through your system, sending a shockwave to your half-dead cells. you cleared your throat and exhaled.

"thank you, moka," you murmured, sending her a small, grateful smile.

she pouted, clearly pretending to be annoyed. "yeah, yeah. don't make it weird."

you snickered, but then your mind drifted back to something else.

sungho.

you set your spoon down and picked up your phone, planning to send him a quick message. but as you pulled up your contacts, realization smacked you in the face. you didn't have his number.

your eyes widened. but wait, hadn't he given it to you back then? on a tissue or something?

you shot up from your chair. "wait a sec."

you rushed back to your room, grabbing the coat you had worn that day which you never wore again so you didn't have to wash it. praying to whatever higher power existed, you dug into the pockets.

please still be there. please still be there.

your fingers brushed against crumpled tissue, and you nearly cheered when you pulled it out. it was a little worse for wear. pulps flaking off, with some of the ink fading, but the number was still legible.

relieved, you walked back to the kitchen, plopping down into your chair. moka didn’t even look up from her phone.

you carefully typed sungho's number into your phone, saving it as sungho.

slightly hesitant, you finally sent the message.

"hey! it’s me, y/n. i just wanted to thank you for last night. it really meant a lot."

you quickly flipped your phone screen down on the table, like that would somehow make the anxiety disappear. with a deep breath, you returned to your soup, the headache slowly fading—helped by both the food and the painkillers you'd took earlier.

with a relieved sigh, you stood and stretched before turning to moka.

"let's go out together. i have to head to uni in an hour."

moka, still lounging on the couch, hummed. "alright. i'll be heading out around that time too. just hurry up."

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞

everything in the visual arts building buzzed with chatter, students carrying large portfolios, canvases, and sketchbooks as they ran through the corridors. the scent of oil paint and lattes hung in the air.

walking side by side with minji and bae, you trailed slightly behind, hands buried in your hoodie's front pocket, brows knitted together in deep thought. the more you thought about last night, the more your stomach churned.

"ugh, god, i'm so embarrassing," you groaned, letting your head fall dramatically onto bae’s shoulder.

bae, who had long grown accustomed to your whining, barely reacted. she simply nudged you off and chuckled. "i'm sure he doesn't mind. the guy looked pretty genuine when he insisted on helping you last night."

you straightened up, scoffing. "yeah, but that doesn't mean i'm allowed to do cringy shit around him," you muttered, groaning into your hands. the mere thought of what else you could've done in your drunken state made you want to dig a hole in the ground and disappear.

minji, walking on your other side, rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. "you were drunk, y/n. i'm sure he understands."

bae nodded, a smug grin forming on her lips. "exactly. and let's not forget—he even called moka to have your clothes changed out of respect."

you pursed your lips, thinking about it.

they had a point. sungho had gone out of his way to make sure you were okay, even going as far as to clean up your place before moka could even get there. and he didn't have to do that. most guys would've just dumped you on your bed and left you in your misery. that had to be one of the most thoughtful things a man could do.

you exhaled through your nose. "yeah, i guess you're right," you muttered, deciding to just agree before they lectured you further.

"good. now let's get going before you spiral again," bae said, grabbing your wrist and dragging you forward.

you stumbled slightly but followed along, grumbling. "still embarrassing, though."

minji let out a laugh, shaking her head as she walked beside you. "only you would find a guy being nice to you a source of stress."

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞

the entire morning had passed with just class introductions, some more bearable than others. a few professors were merciful, easing the tension with icebreaker games or casual q&a sessions, while others dove straight into full-blown lectures as if they'd been waiting all summer to unload academic hell upon everyone. and then there were those who, with an evil glint in their eyes, assigned an art project on the first day, due by the end of the month.

if it weren't for the fact that bae and minji were in your class, you were pretty sure you'd already be drafting your dropout plan. but knowing you had at least two people to suffer alongside made things a little more manageable.

now, the common cafeteria was packed, buzzing with life. groups of students squeezed through the maze of tables, some balancing trays piled high with food, others scanning the area for an open seat. a few unlucky ones walked alone, looking like lost souls in need of a companion.

luckily, you weren't one of them.

settled comfortably at a table with bae and minji, you took a sip of your banana milk, letting out a sigh.

"i should probably thank sungho in person later," you mused, swirling the straw in your drink.

"orrrr," bae drawled, gaze flicking behind you, "you could just do it now."

your brows furrowed, confused, until you noticed minji subtly nodding in the same direction. curious, you turned around, only for your breath to catch slightly at the sight of sungho approaching your table.

even from a distance, he was already recognizable. his neatly styled black hair, the way his brown knitted sweater complemented the white trousers he wore, it was unfair how effortlessly put-together he looked. the moment he saw you notice him, his relaxed walk turned into a light jog.

"hey," sungho greeted with a small wave as he came to a stop in front of you, his usual warm smile making you feel comfortable and at ease than earlier.

"hey, sungho," you replied, a little shyly. "i was actually just about to look for you. i never got to properly thank you for last night."

his smile widened slightly, but he simply shook his head. "don't worry about it. i'm just glad you’re feeling better now."

the sincerity in his voice made you relax, and before you knew it, the two of you had settled at the table, effortlessly falling into conversation. sungho listened attentively as you half-jokingly recounted your embarrassment from last night, occasionally teasing you about your drunk state but never in a way that felt mocking. it was nice, and funny.

the atmosphere was lively, full of laughter and banter between you and your friends. for a moment, it felt like nothing could ruin the easy-going mood. but then, that familiar presence approached from behind. you didn't even need to turn around to know who it was.

"what's up?" it was leehan's voice.

unlike before, though, his presence didn't send an immediate wave of tension through you. it was different. not as suffocating, not as cold. maybe even a little hesitant, but certainly not as distant as it once was.

minji's head snapped up, her eyes flickering between you and leehan before she wiggled her eyebrows very unsubtly.

you shot her a glare, rolling your eyes before turning your attention back to leehan. "oh, hey. have a seat." you gestured toward the open chair in front of you, beside bae and minji.

leehan hesitated for a second before nodding, slipping into the chair.

sungho, who had been casually engaged in conversation just moments ago, went quiet. his gaze panned toward leehan. there was no hostility, no obvious tension, but there was definitely something.

leehan, surprisingly, had struck up a pretty lighthearted conversation with everyone at the table. you had expected at least some awkwardness, but he blended in so smoothly it was almost unsettling. you never saw him like this before. he was funny—annoyingly funny, actually, and just as engaging as sungho. the entire time, it felt like watching two suns trying to outshine each other.

at one point, leehan smirked and leaned forward, resting his chin lazily on his hand. "you know," he started, glancing at sungho with faux innocence, "this guy once tripped over absolutely nothing in the middle of the basketball court last year. right in front of the coach. he tried to play it off like he was stretching, but—" leehan chuckled, shaking his head, "he was just laid out on the floor for a solid minute."

sungho groaned, burying his face in his hands. "oh my god, you said you wouldn't bring that up."

minji burst out laughing, nearly choking on her drink. "wait—was this before or after he lectured the entire team about grace and balance?" sungho added.

"oh, right after," leehan confirmed with a grin. "like, literally five minutes after."

sungho shot him a look. "okay, but at least i don't spend every match arguing with the referees like some people."

leehan gasped dramatically. "excuse me? those calls were objectively unfair! i had to say something."

sungho smirked. "did you have to get benched because of it, though?"

leehan waved dismissively. "that’s beside the point."

the table erupted in laughter again. the competitive yet easy-going energy between the two guys was unexpectedly enjoyable, until sungho, seemingly out of nowhere, dropped a comment that made the entire atmosphere shift.

"leehan did nothing the entire summer but brood in his room, talking to his pet fish about this one girl that he no longer sees," sungho quipped, a teasing lilt in his voice.

bae snorted, slapping the table, while sungho chuckled to himself. even you and minji let out small laughs, but something felt off. you glanced at leehan, expecting him to roll his eyes or fire back with a witty remark, but instead, his expression flickered, but for a moment, his gaze snapped toward sungho, his eyes flashing like a lighter flicking to life.

then, just as quickly, he forced out a laugh, the sound slightly strained. "he's bluffing," leehan said, waving a hand dismissively. he played it off so smoothly that if you weren't paying attention, you wouldn't have noticed how his shoulders tensed ever so slightly.

sungho, picking up on something, simply nodded and let it slide, shifting the conversation elsewhere. the moment passed, and soon, the table was back to its usual energy. but something about it lingered.

with classes finally over, you and minji strolled down the street together, the golden light of the sunset casting long shadows across the pavement. bae had gone home early, leaving just the two of you to talk about the day's events like any friends would. and naturally, the main topic on your mind was what had happened at lunch.

"i wonder who sungho was talking about earlier," minji said, hands tucked into the pockets of her jeans. "you know, about leehan."

you shrugged, pretending not to care. "who knows." you were curious too—annoyingly curious, but you weren't about to admit that. "i mean, he spent all of high school avoiding us, so god knows what he's up to. how are we even supposed to know what's going on in his life?"

minji hummed in agreement, but you weren’t done yet.

"and besides, it's none of my business," you added, voice a little sharper than intended. "like, why should i care? he can talk to his pet fish about whoever he wants. not my problem."

minji gave you a look.

you met her gaze, only then realizing how animated you had been. your hands gesturing wildly, your tone was defensive. the eye-rolling, the scoffing, the way your eyebrows had lifted off your face, it was all a little too much for someone who supposedly didn't care.

minji's lips curled into a smirk.

"what?" you snapped, suddenly feeling self-conscious. minji just snickered. "nothing."

"then stop looking at me like that."

she held up her hands in mock surrender, but the mischief in her expression didn't fade.

"chill, dude," she chuckled, taking a step backward while still observing you with a grin.

you groaned. "can you not? i’m just not in the mood right now."

minji just simply turned on her heel and walked ahead, still laughing under her breath. and even though you wanted to ignore it, you couldn't help but replay sungho's words in your mind, over and over again. who was the girl leehan spent his summer brooding over?

you shook your head, dismissing it as just a bad mood—or hell, maybe even an incoming period dragging your emotions to rock bottom. either way, it didn't matter. that conversation was nothing more than casual banter, something that should’ve been funny.

this dynamic between you and leehan carried on for the next three weeks leading up to the membership training. it wasn't quite the same as how things had been back in middle school or high school. no, that dynamic had been colder, distant. this, however, was different. by it, you meant the mildly annoying way sungho kept bringing up that girl—this mysterious someone from his brother's old school that leehan had supposedly fumbled so badly he locked himself in their family house all summer.

and every time it was mentioned, you felt something prickle inside you. it wasn't anger, not exactly. not jealousy either—or at least, that's what you kept telling yourself. but it bothered you, even if you couldn't quite pinpoint why. yet, just as quickly as the feeling crept up, you shook it off, unwilling to confront the unknown reasons behind it.

at one point, your friends—who, for some reason, absolutely couldn't stand you being "moody" again, turned an entire hangout into a full-blown conspiracy session. half the conversation revolved around guessing who sungho was talking about, as if solving this mystery would somehow fix your unspoken irritation.

"maybe it’s minju?" you had blurted out once, the thought slipping before you could stop it.

and from that moment on, it never left your mind. minju here, minju there. of course it would be her—who else? it was almost like you were suffering from a disease without knowing the symptoms or the cause. but at the end of the day, you always pushed the thoughts aside with a dismissive whatever before moving on. before seeing leehan again.

because, despite everything, you were weirdly okay with how things were turning out. leehan was catching up to you, bit by bit. and though there were times when he would go nonverbal or hesitate to approach when sungho wasn't around, progress was progress, as your friends liked to say. 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞

the bubbling excitement in your chest all but drowned out any thoughts from the past few weeks. it was finally here—freshman membership training day. a much needed getaway where all the first-years, regardless of department, would head off to a resort or campsite for a day packed with team-building activities, games, and enough forced socializing to either break the ice or break your spirit.

and being the extrovert you were, this was the kind of thing that scratched your brain in all the right ways.

buses lined up in front of the university gate, engines rumbling, ready to take dozens of eager students off to what was basically an overnight camp. you, bae, and minji stood beside your assigned ride, surrounded by the buzz of students lugging their belongings.

unlike your friends, who had each brought a single backpack like they were minimalist monks on a pilgrimage, you had an actual small suitcase—because, unlike some people, you weren't about to survive on just a bar of soap and a spare pair of clothes.

bae snapped a selfie in front of the bus, grinning as she admired her phone screen.

"moka would've loved this," she sighed dreamily, still fixated on whatever conversation she was having.

you and minji locked eyes knowingly.

"of course, moka would love this," you sneered, shaking your head as minji crossed her arms.

ever since the café incident, things between moka and bae had been going suspiciously well. it wasn't surprising when moka eventually asked for jinsol's number, and even less surprising when their conversations became an all-the-time thing. at this point, whenever the four of you went out, it was as if bae was the only person in moka's universe.

and to no one's shock, bae didn't seem clueless about it either.

before you could tease her further, the bus driver's call rang out, signaling the final boarding. minji and bae hopped on first, disappearing into the crowded aisle. you were about to follow when something in your peripheral vision made you pause.

across from your bus, at the baggage compartment of the next one over, leehan was crouched down, shoving his suitcase away.

as if sensing your stare, he turned his head, and for a moment, his dark eyes met yours. then, a small, casual smile flashed across his face.

you blinked, caught off guard, but instinctively returned the gesture before quickly stepping onto the bus. squeezing through the narrow aisle, you tiptoed slightly to shove your small suitcase into the overhead compartment before sitting down beside minji.

bae, now seated across from you, was already glued to her phone, fingers moving rapidly, with an ear-to-ear smile on her lips. no doubt texting a certain someone.

you leaned your head against the window, the cool glass pressing against your temple as the bus rumbled beneath you. outside, the campus gates were already shrinking into the distance, giving way to open roads and rows of trees that motioned together in blurs of green. this was going to be fun. you told yourself that at least five times now. an overnight membership training trip with your friends, new faces to meet—your kind of scene. but despite all the excitement, your mind had the audacity to wander somewhere else. or rather, to someone else.

leehan, of course.

you frowned slightly at your own thoughts, shifting in your seat as if that would shake them off. it's also going to be okay since he's there. maybe we can get closer too. the idea came naturally, and you almost wanted to groan at yourself. not like that. just as friends. obviously.

it wasn't weird to think about a classmate, right? you'd known leehan for years, even if you two barely interacted back then. there was no reason for this to feel like something more. yet, for some reason, the thought of the departments being split for the trip made your stomach sink just a little.

you let out a sigh and leaned back against your seat, ready to shut down that train of thought before it went any further. but then,

"i heard they're not separating the departments this year," a voice from the seat behind you said.

your ears perked up before you could stop yourself. the tiniest smile tugged at your lips before you even realized it, but the second you felt it, you immediately forced it away, scrambling to put on a neutral face. you plugged in your earphones in a hurry, shoving the thought deep, deep down. what was i thinking? of course i'd like it if leehan was there. he's my classmate. my friend. that's it.

minji, who had been silently scrolling through her phone beside you, suddenly muttered without looking up, "sure, keep telling that to yourself."

for a  moment, you thought she had unlocked some kind of psychic ability, or worse, could hear your thoughts. but then you realized that you weren't just thinking those things. you were mumbling them out loud.

heat crawled up your neck as you shot her a glare, trying to play it cool. "i don't know what you're talking about," you said, turning to stare aggressively out the window.

minji let out a chuckle but didn't push further, too busy on her screen. thank god.

still, you made a mental note to never let your thoughts slip past your lips again.

you had almost dozed off for the entire ride, your head lolling slightly against the window, but just as you were about to fully drift into sleep, the bus came to a sudden stop. blinking groggily, you rubbed your eyes and looked around, realizing that you had finally arrived at the campsite.

the moment you stepped off the bus, a fresh breeze greeted you. the area was breathtaking—an expansive field surrounded by towering trees, their leaves rustling softly in the wind. in the distance, the city skyline twinkled under the sun, tiny and far away.

excited murmurs filled the area as students scrambled around, pulling out their phones to take pictures, pointing at every little thing that caught their attention. someone from another group had already started a mini-photoshoot under a particularly aesthetic tree, while others were busy inspecting the camping grounds.

your group had already decided to bring just one large tent—moka's, which bae had to practically beg to borrow. you, bae, and minji set your bags down at a good spot as they started unfolding the tent, the two already bickering about the instructions before they even began.

"i'm telling you, this pole goes there—"

"bae, you don't even know how to set up a tent—"

"neither do you!"

you took that as your cue to step away before you got roped into their struggle. wandering off toward the edge of the field, you took a deep breath, feeling in the peaceful atmosphere.

"what do you think of the site?"

the voice beside you made you blink in surprise. you turned your head, meeting leehan's eyes. he stood there casually, hands in his pockets, looking out at the scenery.

you hesitated for a second before offering a small, tight-lipped smile. "it's nice here," you mumbled, shifting your gaze back toward the horizon. "away from the city pollution."

leehan nodded in agreement, his eyes still fixed on the view.

you stood side by side, both staring at the scenery, neither saying a word. you weren't even sure why, but every interaction with leehan felt like this. awkward, stiff, like your usually endless vocabulary shrank to fifty words the moment he was around. you weren't even sure if he felt the same, but judging by how he never really tried to start conversations either, you figured he probably did.

what were you supposed to say? the weather's nice? and then what? you could already hear the conversation dying within seconds.

eventually, leehan let out a soft sigh and broke the silence. "i'll see you later at the activities."

you blinked at him blankly before giving a small nod. "alright, see you later."

without another word, he turned and walked back to his group, where his friends were still setting up their tents.

before you could even process the encounter, minji appeared by your side, arms crossed.

"wow, didn't know you and leehan were buddies now." she nudged your side teasingly.

you rolled your eyes and let out a chuckle. "shut up."

the two of you made your way back to your tent just as the upperclassmen and club leaders began gathering everyone for the welcoming speech and an overview of the team-building games.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞

the afternoon was a pack of excitement and laughter as the games began. you had expected them to be fun, but they were even better than you expected. your department was in high spirits, the energy was contagious as you all threw yourselves into the challenges. every win felt like a small victory, and every loss was met with dramatic groans and playful jokes.

you knew this kind of fun wouldn't last. soon enough, university life would hit like a truck, drowning you in exams and deadlines. so you let yourself enjoy every second of it, living in the moment.

as expected, you, minji, and bae weren't allowed to be on the same team, much to bae's dismay. "we're literally the glue of this department," she whined as the department head dragged her away to a different group.

but the team you ended up with was fun, and it was nice meeting new people.

still, you'd be lying if you said you weren't a little disappointed that you weren't on the same team as leehan. not that it mattered. okay, maybe it mattered just a little.

unfortunately for you, the teams were formed by department, meaning you wouldn't be working with him anytime soon. however, that didn't mean you wouldn't be competing against them.

the final game of the day before dinner was announced, and a wave of excitement ran through the crowd.

"whoever loses will be on grill duty for the night," a senior called out, smirking as students groaned and laughed.

you barely had time to react before you felt hands pushing you forward.

"y/n, go!!" someone shouted.

before you knew it, you were standing at the center of the field, blinking in confusion as your entire department cheered wildly behind you. apparently, your earlier victories had already made you a fan favorite, and now, they were practically throwing you into battle.

"that's our girl!!" bae's voice rang from the crowd, earning more cheers.

you let out a breathy laugh, shaking your head as you turned to face your opponent.

the roar of the other team's cheers suddenly grew louder. intrigued, you glanced over at them, only for your stomach to drop slightly.

the performance arts department was celebrating loudly, their voices echoing across the field. and at the center of it all, stepping forward with the casual confidence of someone who knew they were about to put on a show—leehan.

hands in his pockets, he walked toward the middle of the field, he was relaxed, almost lazy. then, as if he had been expecting you all along, he simply smiled and raised his eyebrows at you.

the senior hosting the game smirked, clearly enjoying the situation. "alright, the mechanics are simple," he announced, arms crossed. "palm push. no hard shoving—just light, strategic pushing. whoever falls first loses, and their department gets stuck on grill duty for the night."

of course, out of all games, it had to be palm push. and out of all people, it had to be leehan.

just the thought of standing inches away from him, hands practically touching, forced to look straight into his eyes made you want to dig a hole and never come out. your friends were definitely going to drag this up until the end of university. scratch that—the entire department was about to witness your awkward chemistry unfold in real time.

but it was too late to back out now.

taking a deep breath, you stepped onto the log, wobbling almost instantly. the wooden surface was rough beneath your feet, the bark stripped away in some places, making it dangerously smooth. your arms flailed as you tried to steady yourself, and you barely noticed leehan flinch beside you, his hand twitching slightly like he was ready to catch you if you fell.

you managed to stay upright somehow, but the difference between you and leehan was already obvious. where you wobbled like an inflatable tube man, leehan stepped onto the log with ease, his stance was solid, and a relaxed posture. he barely even shifted his weight, while you were one wrong breath away from falling face first.

a loud groan erupted from the performance arts students behind him.

"don't lose, leehan!" one of them called. "we don't wanna smell like charcoal for the next three days!"

"yeah, no pressure," minji added with an evil grin, winking at you from the sidelines.

you turned to face leehan, standing only a breath apart. his hands hovered hesitantly in front of him, and for a good second, neither of you moved.

a beat of silence, then another.

and then—

"oh my god, are they just gonna stare at each other?" someone groaned from the crowd.

"just push already!"

leehan exhaled, his gaze flickering to the side for half a second, just enough time for you to notice. his ears were turning red.

he wasn't making the first move.

so, you took a deep breath and pressed your palms against his. the moment you made contact, leehan's reflexes kicked in. and, he dodged.

his hands swung back, completely avoiding your push at the last second, and then— your own momentum collapsed.

your foot slipped. your weight tipped forward. the log suddenly felt like the most unstable thing in existence as gravity won.

gasps rippled through the crowd as you flailed, arms reaching for anything, anyone.

leehan moved.

his hands caught your shoulders in a firm grip, fingers tightening instinctively. but it was already too late. you were falling, and instead of pushing you back up—he pulled you toward him.

a rush of wind filled your ears as the two of you went tumbling down. you barely processed the feeling of his chest against yours before you crashed onto the grass, landing right on top of him.

the world tilted. the shouts from the crowd muffled. for a split second, all you could focus on was the solid warmth beneath you—the rise and fall of leehan's chest, the way his dark lashes fluttered slightly as he blinked up at you. his hands were still gripping your shoulders, his brows furrowed slightly like he was still processing what just happened.

the realization hit you just as you lifted your head, only to see him staring up at the sky, lips pressed into a tight line, his face was burning red.

the entire field erupted—some students were groaning in disappointment, others were screaming like they had just witnessed a scene straight out of a romance drama.

"yo, leehan took the fall!!" someone from his team yelled.

"did he just sacrifice himself?!"

"that was so dramatic, what the hell—"

your own department wasn't much better. minji and bae were practically dying in the background, their laughter was hysterical.

"oh my god-oh my god," bae wheezed, gripping minji's shoulder for support. "that was the most awkward slow-motion fall i have ever seen in my life—"

"leehan, buddy, you're getting grilled for this one," another guy from his team teased, making the rest of his department cackle.

you, on the other hand, were still frozen in place, staring down at leehan, who seemed to be mentally processing his life choices. his arms had already dropped to his sides, but his eyes refused to meet yours.

"…did you just let yourself fall?" you finally asked, voice barely above a whisper.

leehan's jaw tightened. he exhaled sharply through his nose before muttering, "you were gonna fall face-first into the ground."

you blinked. "yeah, but-"

before you could even finish your sentence, he suddenly sat up, shifting you off him gently that made your face heat up. "forget it," he mumbled, finally looking at you quickly before standing up.

you stayed seated, still trying to process what just happened as the senior clapped his hands together.

"well! that was… an interesting match," he said, barely holding back a grin. "congrats to the performance arts department!, you know what to do—get the grill ready."

a wave of groans and playful complaints came from leehan's team, but they didn't seem all that upset, more entertained, if anything.

leehan, meanwhile, didn't say another word as he dusted off his clothes and walked back toward his department, his ears still visibly red.

minji and bae wasted no time sprinting toward you. "you have to be kidding me," minji said, breathless from laughter. "that was the most painfully awkward yet cinematic thing i've ever witnessed."

bae grabbed your shoulders, shaking you slightly. "he let himself fall, y/n. fall."

"i know—" you stammered, still completely overwhelmed.

"oh, we are never letting this go," minji smirked. "your future grandchildren will hear about this."

you groaned, burying your face in your hands.

you finally pushed yourself up, brushing dirt off your clothes while shooting a glare at minji and bae, who were both clearly enjoying themselves way too much.

"come on, save the shit for later. the table's waiting." you furrowed your brows and quickly jogged toward the open field, where a designated dining area had been set up—foldable tables lined up neatly under hanging string lights, with food stalls stationed nearby.

behind you, minji and bae exchanged a look before following, still grinning like they had just witnessed the juiciest scene of the year.

the scent of grilled pork and sizzling spices wafted through the air as you approached the grilling station. the area was mostly empty except for leehan and his two friends tending to the food. he stood near the grill, tongs in hand, flipping pieces of marinated pork. the glow from the flames reflected an orange light on his face, making his usual sharp features seem softer—though the redness on his ears tells the fact that he was definitely still thinking about what happened.

unfortunately, so were you.

but if nobody else in the field seemed to care about your very public fall and totally-not-a-hug, except for your nosy friends, then maybe, you could pretend it never happened.

with a quick glance back at your table where minji and bae were already watching like they were waiting for more drama, you sighed and walked toward leehan.

"hey." you bit your lip, shifting your weight as you awkwardly patted the sides of your jeans.

leehan glanced at you, his grip on the tongs tightening for half a second before he quickly snapped his attention back to the grill. "uh—hi." he stuttered slightly, eyes locked on the sizzling meat like it was the most fascinating thing around.

the air between you felt weird. not bad, just charged. and the last thing you wanted was for your friends to have more material to tease you with, so instead of bringing up the fall, you latched onto the first neutral thing that came to mind.

"why are you and your two friends the only ones grilling?" you asked, arms crossing as you tilted your head.

leehan exhaled, scratching the back of his neck. "oh, well. i fell on purpose, and i didn't exactly lose because of—uh, skill issue." his voice dropped slightly at the end. "so i told them i'd just stay here and handle it while they took a break. my friends decided to stick around."

at that, you turned your head slightly, only to find his two friends watching with matching shit-eating grins. one even wiggled his eyebrows at you.

your throat went dry. "oh."

feeling the weight of guilt creeping in, you lowered your voice. "i'm… sorry about that. you could've just let me fall. literally that's the purpose of the game."

leehan's brows furrowed. "no, no, don't worry about it." his reply was quick, almost automatic, but he still didn’t dare look at you for more than half a second—like prolonged eye contact might make him explode.

you nodded, deciding not to push further. "okay, well… i'll be at our table." you gestured vaguely in the direction of your friends, who were still watching from across the field, minji giving you an exaggerated thumbs-up.

leehan finally glanced at you, just for a second before nodding.

as you turned and walked away, the moment you were just barely out of earshot, one of leehan's friends, gyuvin, wasted no time.

he bumped his shoulder. "what was that about?" his grin was obnoxious.

leehan rolled his eyes. "nothing."

gyuvin's smirk widened. "you like that art kid, don't you?"

leehan shot him a glare, but his damn ears and smile were giving him away again. "it's not like that," he muttered, flipping another piece of pork with slightly more force than necessary. "i just—she was gonna fall face-first. i was just helping."

gyuvin raised his hands sarcastically. "sure, sure. i didn't even say anything about what happened earlier. defensive punk." he snickered before turning back to the grill.

leehan let out a deep sigh. his gaze drifted toward your table, where you were now laughing at something minji said, eyes crinkling, completely at ease.

and somehow, despite everything, he didm't feel the need to avoid you anymore. if anything, the whole thing just made him less tense around you. he then looked back down at the grill, the corner of his lips quirking up slightly, especially knowing that sungho wasn't around. 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞

hours had passed, and everything had gone as smoothly as it could for a night filled with alcohol-fueled chaos. the majority of the students were sprawled across tables, completely blacked out, while the slightly more functional seniors—who weren't much better off, had taken on the duty of dragging everyone into their tents. your two friends were no exception, and you had just finished dragging their deadweight bodies inside, tucking them in like unruly toddlers.

unlike them, you were still fairly sober, well, at least sober enough to remain functional. you couldn't afford to be wasted like the last time, not when leehan was also among the last ones standing. the thought of embarrassing yourself in front of him isn't in your bucket list.

with the last of the stragglers taken care of, you helped leehan and the remaining seniors clean up the field. tables were folded back into place, chairs stacked, grills set aside, and stalls closed. most of the lamps had been turned off, leaving only the dim glow of the ones hanging from wooden posts scattered around the area. the atmosphere had shifted from lively chaos to a sleepy, dreamlike haze.

it was already past 11 pm, but exhaustion hadn't caught up to you yet. instead, a restless energy buzzed under your skin. you grabbed a chair and positioned it a few steps away from the tents, facing the open view of the night. the sky stretched before you.

you cracked open a bottle of soju, deciding that now was the perfect time to have your drink. the night was winding down, and for once, you could just sit back and enjoy it.

then, you turned your head just as leehan walked over, dragging a chair beside yours. a can of beer dangled from his fingers.

"can i sit here?" he asked, glancing at you.

you hummed in response, nodding as you popped a chip into your mouth. "mhm, sure."

the two of you sat in comfortable silence, the distant conversations of the last few awake students—two seniors who were obviously a couple and three freshmen still lingering on the field, filled the background.

"i had fun today," you murmured absentmindedly, crunching on another chip.

leehan let out a deep sigh. "me too. today was great."

you glanced at him before speaking again. "thanks again... for earlier."

he simply smiled, shaking his head. "no problem. don't mention it."

a beat of silence passed, but something passed by your mind—a spark of curiosity you could no longer ignore.

"leehan, by any chance…" you hesitated for a second before looking at him directly. "did you used to hate me?"

he froze mid-sip, his can of beer hovering just before his lips. his expression flickered before he placed the can down beside him.

"no, y/n. i didn't hate you," he said simply.

but that wasn't enough for you. "then why?" you didn't elaborate, but you knew he understood exactly what you were asking. "and don't avoid my question."

he let out a sigh, as if he's caught in a corner. "i just… didn't know how to talk to you, that's all," he admitted before taking another sip of his beer.

you scoffed under your breath, "you could've just said hi. or, i don't know, maybe actually responded when i tried to talk to you a million times?"

leehan sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. "it's easier said than done."

you narrowed your eyes. "what’s that supposed to mean?"

"i did try, y/n," he muttered. "it's just… there were reasons."

before you could press further, his phone buzzed in his pocket. he barely glanced at the screen before standing up.

"i have to take this. it's sungho."

you watched as he walked away, pressing the phone to his ear. you exhaled, swirling your drink before downing the shot in one go. by the time leehan returned a few minutes later, the mood had already shifted.

neither of you spoke, but the itch to start another conversation is still there. you weren't about to bring up the previous topic again, at least not now. so instead, you went for something else.

"by the way," you started, tilting your head slightly, "who was the person your brother was talking about during summer vacation?"

leehan, now slightly buzzed himself, didn't seem as guarded. he simply hummed, pretending to think.

your lips curled into a teasing smirk. "was it minju?" you nudged his shoulder playfully. "moka and minji swore you had a thing for her. can't blame you though, she's pretty."

your voice started lighthearted, but by the end, your playful sneer faded into something softer. you turned away, pretending to focus on the open view again, but the slight crease in your brows said otherwise.

after a second of silence, leehan spoke.

"it's—" he hesitated, his fingers twitching against the beer can. "it's not…"

you turned back to him, eyebrows raised. "what?"

he shifted in his seat, finally facing you fully.

"it's not what you think," he said, his voice quieter this time.

there was something about the way he said it—something hidden between his words. his gaze met yours, intense and unfazed, and it felt like he was trying to tell you something without actually saying it out loud. just like he did during orientation.

"it's really not… y/n." his fingers curled slightly, as if resisting the urge to reach out to touch your hand resting on the armrest.

your breath hitched. then, his gaze dropped, and his expression hardened. "i regretted shutting you out for years. and i thought…" he swallowed. "i thought i'd never see you again."

your heart stumbled over itself. but before you could even begin to process what he was saying, he shook his head abruptly.

"no, forget it." his tone shifted back to dismissive. "i just felt guilty, that's all."

and just like that, he stood up, smiling down at you as if the conversation never happened.

"good night."

you blinked, still reeling from what you just heard. "...good night, leehan."

as he walked away, disappearing into the field, you sat there, gripping the soju bottle a little tighter. yes, you were buzzed. but you weren't that drunk. you heard every single word. you absorbed everything.

and honestly? sometimes, you just wanted to punch the truth straight out of his stomach.

for weeks, leehan had been confusing. but now it was getting worse. still, your sister's words, wooyoung's advice, and your mom's reminders echoed in your mind.

"give it time." you exhaled, leaning back in your chair, the night air cool against your warm cheeks.

easier said than done.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞

after that evening, the fragile bridge between you and leehan seemed to be crumbling again—slowly this time, like glue unsticking at the edges rather than shattering all at once. it wasn't like in high school, when he'd casually strike up a conversation with you one day and then act like you didn't exist the next. no, this was different. leehan was still around, but there was a distance creeping in. he avoided certain conversations, left texts on read a little longer than usual, but he didn't leave you hanging or outright ignore you either.

you hadn't told your friends about what you and leehan talked about that night. you already knew they wouldn't let it go, the same way they still hadn't stopped hounding you about what happened during the game. and when they told moka? oh, it got worse.

"ugh, i would pay to see that firsthand."

"i bet leehan couldn't sleep that day."

"do you have a video of it?"

it was like they were tuning in to some long-awaited high school drama, hanging onto every detail as if they were watching a season finale. meanwhile, you were just confused.

but soon enough, life caught up.

hell period arrived in full force—projects piled up, deadlines loomed, and sleep became a myth. for three months straight, you barely had time to think about anything except surviving the academic hell. even leehan, whose presence had occupied too much of your headspace before, became just another background character in your overloaded brain.

so, when sungho's voice echoed through the empty art studio one night, it startled you out of your exhaustion.

"need a lift?"

you blinked up at him, paint-streaked and sleep-deprived, having spent the past day and a half obsessing over a portrait for your professor, because, of course, your perfectionist tendencies wouldn't let you submit anything less than flawless.

letting out a sigh, you stretched your stiff arms above your head. "yeah, might not have the patience to wait for the bus tonight." you chuckled, tugging off your apron.

sungho leaned against your desk, watching as you packed up. "band practice ended earlier, figured you'd still be here. this place is basically your second home at this point."

"tell me about it." you slung your bag over your shoulder.

"oh, by the way, thanks again for designing our band logo. that probably ate up a lot of your time."

you waved him off with a smile. "no worries. happy to be part of your future world domination as a band."

sungho laughed, but before he could offer anything in return, you quickly shut him down. you weren't taking any grand gestures as a 'thank you'—except maybe a ride home, since the two of you lived in the same apartment complex.

as you walked through the dimly lit corridors of your building, sungho glanced over at you. "you should eat something proper. come have dinner at my place. i insist."

"nah, i'll be fine with ramyeon," you replied without hesitation.

sungho clicked his tongue and stepped in front of you, blocking your way. "please? just this once? think of it as a proper thank-you, and then i won't insist anymore."

you rolled your eyes but couldn't help smiling. "fine. alright."

grinning in victory, sungho led the way to his apartment and entered the passcode. "welcome," he said, stepping inside and neatly placing his shoes on the rack. you followed, taking in the surroundings as you set your bag down on the sofa.

to your surprise, the place was spotless, organized. almost disturbingly clean.

"this is not what i expected." you smirked, leaning against the kitchen counter as he disappeared into his room to put away his guitar.

"what, you thought i'd be a mess because i'm a man, and in a band?" sungho chuckled as he emerged, heading straight for the fridge. "i clean pretty often."

"i can tell." you glanced around, noticing small personal touches—decorations on the shelves, a game console by the tv, a fish plushie resting against the couch. "you've got a lot of stuff for someone who lives alone."

sungho snorted, pulling a frozen steak from the fridge. "alone? oh, no. i live with leehan."

you froze mid-scan of the apartment.

"—what?"

before you could fully process that bombshell, a door creaked open across the room.

"who the hell are you talking to—"

leehan's voice cut off abruptly.

your eyes met his. his eyes met yours. both of you stood frozen like deer caught in headlights.

"what are you doing here?!" leehan demanded, whipping his head toward sungho like he had just betrayed a sacred brotherly code.

you opened your mouth, then closed it, still too baffled by the revelation to form a proper response.

of course, he'd be living with his brother. why did your brain automatically assume he lived with his parents?

still, the fact that he looked just as shocked as you felt was almost funny. you cleared your throat, pointing weakly at the wall next to you. "uh… i live next door."

leehan's face twisted in a mix of disbelief and regret, like he had just realized there was no escaping you.

sungho, meanwhile, simply turned back to the stove and muttered, "why are you two so shocked to see each other?"

- to be continued

[justporo]

Even more fluffy relationship headcanons for Astarion and Tav

Listen guys, I'm not done yet. For now, as soon as I get one idea out, three more pop up in my mind and since you guys seem to really like these (it's seriously and positively insane to me), I'll happily provide you more as long as I am able to. So, let's-a go: more headcanons and little ideas about them being together!

(I formerly used an reuploaded and stolen version of this gif here - I didn't check where it came from and that wasn't right - I'm sorry!)

You love when Astarion smiles at you - just openly and full of joy; the sort of smile you've rarely seen from him during your adventures but they keep getting more and more, also they make him look just so young and carefree and beautiful and your heart just... melts

When Astarion quickly notices how you basically faint whenever he does this, he starts employing it to work his charms on you when he needs it - not the real big and joyous smiles though because they are so real and cherished to him he wouldn't dare use it to tease or manipulate you - they're only reserved to make you happy

Charming you is like breathing to Astarion though, you are just so helpless against his flattery and flirting because why would you resist if you could just give him everything that makes him happy?

When you mention once though that you'd hope to gain some immunity to it some time, Astarion is insulted: "No, love, making you blush is my favourite thing in the world. You are so beautiful with your cheeks all flushed. As long as I have a say in it, we will never stop!"

Tav likes teasing him just as much as Astarion enjoys it the other the way around: "You know if you would stop drawing your brows together all the time, it'd take fifty years off your face immediately." Moments of silence in which Astarion is just utterly shocked by your burn, then: "Who taught you to be this brutal, darling?" You raise an eyebrow at him, he helplessly lifts his arms: "Yeah right, I have only myself to blame."

Also, Astarion and Tav are definitely the kind of power couple that throw each other meaningful sassy looks when they're with other people and those are talking shit or something

Also, afterwards they will most definitely discuss and gossip over everything they experienced

Astarion is definitely the kind of man that would shower Tav with gifts, from coming home with a single beautiful flower that "reminded me of you, my beautiful blossom" ("How cheesy..." "Ah, so rather a gouda next time?") or a nice bottle of wine to share to bigger gestures like jewelry or expensive dresses ("When am I ever gonna wear this, Astarion?" "I don't know, we'll just make an opportunity!")

Tav loves all of his gifts but probably the small ones or the hand-crafted ones the most, she's happy with the little things but Astarion insists she deserves the big ones just as much

One time though, Astarion comes home with something else entirely; it's pouring outside and he's completely drenched and hiding something in his doublet jacket; "What do you have there, Astarion, a wheel of cheese?" Astarion carefully opens up his jacket to reveal a small white kitten that is just as drenched as him and is desperately trying to cling to the vampire's chest. "I found her all alone in a dark alleyway, cold and completely soaked, I thought maybe we could take care of her and she could be friends with Scratch?", he says while he carefully lifts up the small ball of fluff with an incredible softness in his eyes. Your heart is thoroughly melting as you walk over to them and you give Astarion the most loving of kisses

Well, the last one would almost be a drabble on it's own, I saw a similar post that made me think of this (I will find and tag them later!) Hope you enjoyed and I'm late for work now, whoops...

This is the post I mentioned before, by @mushy6902 (I hope it's okay I wrote a somewhat similar idea, thanks for inspiring me!)

[ghoostlystar]

The Player as a roommate for the experiments-children in the orphanage Headcanons.

(That nobody asked for but I'm writing anyway.)

Parte 1- Kissy Missy, DogDay and Poppy.

Kissy Missy

-She is very shy and ends up not even responding when you introduce yourself. She also has a tendency to not look at people's faces very much and thus avoids eye contact.

-She seems to really like drawing, when you are in the room together, she always has her back to you, drawing and painting at her desk.

-Some time later you find out from other children that she seemed to have been very close to her old roommate but had become very sad when she was adopted and so until today she remained quiet and more isolated from the others.

-After finding out this you are sure that she hates you. She probably thinks that you are trying to be a substitute even though it is not your fault.

-This thought does not last long because when another child, who you had accidentally spilled juice on the day you arrived at playcare, accuses you of stealing a toy, you have no idea what to do to prove your innocence because you also didn’t want a bunch of children you did not know to go through your things.

-When the child was about to reach for your backpack, your roommate unexpectedly arrived and reached for his backpack first, taking it out and throwing a teddy bear in their face. You got nervous, like- How would you explain that you hadn't been the one who had taken it?

-Your roommate looked back and you noticed that teacher Delight was right behind you, but instead of looking at you angrily, she was staring at the other child. Surprisingly, she asked her if what Kissy had said was true. It was on camera, she couldn't deny it, the teacher reprimanded her when the child tried to pretend not to understand. Had she hidden the toy in his backpack to incriminate you and had Kissy seen everything and told her?

-From that day on, you had started following Kissy around and noticed how nice and kind she really was, even though she was still shy. She even let you have the crispiest fries at lunch!

DogDay

-You felt very happy to meet him. Even with all the nervousness of the first day and still dealing with painful memories, he made you feel at home from the very beginning.

-He always respected your personal space a lot, even though he didn't mind when you accidentally broke one of his favorite mugs. As a way to reward him for that, you snuck a book from the library and using one of the methods you had learned from eavesdropping on some other children's conversations, you and he stayed up late reading with a glass of warm milk with honey. Miss Harper had looked away when she saw you pass by the kitchen before going to your room.

-His presence made you feel very safe and his cheerful and confident personality helped you adapt easily and not feel uncomfortable in front of so many of his many friends.

-As a birthday present, you gave him a new mug. With all the knowledge and skills you had acquired from ceramics and art classes, you had put in all your effort to give him something good. Fortunately, your attempts had shown good results, the mug with small and large details related to the sun seemed to please him.

-You were a little embarrassed when he started laughing at your explanation about why you chose the designs. But it was true, if the sun was really the first thing that came to your mind when you thought about him, what could you do?

-DogDay stopped laughing and it was his turn to feel a little embarrassed (and flattered) to receive such an honest compliment when he finally realized that you were serious.

-And you were serious. It wasn't just the fake "sun" of that place, it was the real sun. All that radiant light and warm fervor genuinely reminded him of the star.

Poppy

-She was older than you so in the beginning you and her weren’t all that close, with both of you not knowing much about what to talk about.

-Poppy was also incredibly intelligent so there were several things that you had no idea what they were about that you knew she would definitely know. That's how she started helping you with some things you had difficulty with.

-She was very demanding but always explained things really well. That way you became closer.

-When your pants pocket ripped, she sewed it up for you and even embroidered the image of your favorite animal like she did for her own clothes.

-You liked Poppy's scent, it was floral and sweet and reminded you of a person who had once been very important to you and had passed away. Her voice was also something nice to listen to, calm and firm in a way that made you want to trust her.

[minisugakoobies]

Paradise | JJK - Fifteen

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: smut, neighbors to lovers (not quite friends but not quite strangers), slow burn, love triangle, Stripper!AU

Rating: M (18+)

Warnings: we finally get a JinKook showdown in the most ridiculous way possible, the tiniest bit of angst, CONFESSIONS!!, followed by post-confession sex, JK hits it raw, OC in lingerie, fingering, oral sex (f receiving), lots of talking about feelings, I'm sorry but this gets a little soft because I love these two

Word Count: 6.3k

Disclaimers: NSFW, obviously I don’t own BTS - they just inspire me

Summary: That sexy man on stage - the one currently giving your friend the lap dance of her LIFE - is your super shy neighbor, Jeon Jungkook?!

A/N: We're back and we're nearing the end! Thank you to everyone who has been waiting patiently for the next chapter - I didn't mean for it to take so long, but, well, life 🤷‍♀️ Anyway, I'm very excited to share this chapter with you finally - I hope you enjoy!

Unbeta’d as usual. Please don’t be a silent reader, I’d love to hear from you!  💕

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Despite his words earlier, Jungkook is in fact one of the first people on the dance floor when it opens. And of course, you’re right there with him. How could you say no when he holds his hand out and smiles at you like that - like nothing else would make him happier right now than you in his arms?

After all the time you’ve spent admiring Jungkook’s moves when he dances for you, it’s a whole new perspective to get to experience them when you’re dancing with him. Part of that difference is due to the deejay keeping it wholesome with the song selections, since Jennie and Yoongi’s family members are the majority of the revelers surrounding you. So there’s a lot less grinding and a lot more distance between the two of you.

You don’t really try to keep up with him - it’s not that you’re a terrible dancer, it’s just that he’s so fucking good. His every movement is so natural, like he’s not even trying. He does show off just a little bit, when Jisoo eggs him on, slipping into a freakishly accurate robot that has a small ring of guests gathering around to cheer him on. The giant grin on his face tells you he’s enjoying the attention just as much as the faint blush on the tips of his ears tells you he’s just a little bashful about it. 

After a few songs, the music finally slows a little, the crowd thinning as only couples are left. Jungkook draws you close, one arm sliding around your back as the other clasps your hand, holding it to his chest. The room around you falls away as he takes the lead, swaying with you around the floor.

“Are you having a good time, jagi?” he murmurs after a moment. 

“I am, Kookie.” Lifting your head from his shoulder, you gaze into his eyes, feeling that familiar warmth overtake you when he returns your smile. “Thanks for coming with me today.”

“Like I’d turn down the chance for free food and drinks,” he teases, laughing when you huff and try to pull away, tightening his grip to keep you locked in place. “What? I’m just being honest.” 

“Ass,” you mutter, but you can’t stop smiling, and neither can he. He lifts his arm, hand pressing lightly on your back to guide you in a spin, then brings you back into his embrace. You spot Rosé across the room, watching you and Jungkook dance, and she politely claps as you shake your head, grinning. 

The beat picks up again, and your friends surround you and Jungkook. Rosé, Jisoo, and Jin all dance together as Lisa introduces Yi-Jeong to the group. Even Jennie and Yoongi join in, and it’s true what Jennie told you yesterday - her man definitely has moves. Everyone’s happy and laughing, and you’re so full of joy you could just burst.

Jin suddenly twirls, facing Jungkook with an intense look on his face. The younger man takes a step back in surprise as Jin starts to rock his body back and forth, like he’s about to bust out a breakdance move. Is he seriously about to - 

“Ooh, dance battle!” Jisoo cups her hands around her mouth, yelling. Your other friends start whooping, forming a circle around Jungkook and Jin. Jisoo pulls you next to her from where you’ve been standing, so you’re not between them anymore. “Get it, Bambi!” 

While the others around you are shouting encouragement, you just gaze silently between the two men, unsure if you should be joining in. Unsure if this is a friendly competition or if the tense vibes you feel radiating between them is something more. From the expressions on their faces, it’s clear that they’re going to do this, so you just sigh, bobbing along to the beat, waiting for the show. 

Jungkook stops gawking at Jin and begins bedrocking, swinging his hands as he faces Jin with a fierce look. Jin glares back, sticking his arms out as he undulates in a rather impressive wave, rolling his long limbs from left to right. 

It’s not until you hear clapping behind you that you realize that more people have joined the circle, crowding in behind you, shouting Jin’s name. Jungkook hears it too, his brow furrowing slightly. It’s clear his competitive nature’s kicked in when he peels his suit jacket off. You hold your hand out for it automatically, feeling a swoop of heat in your stomach as he gives it to you with a wink. 

The tip of his tongue slips out as Jungkook suddenly throws himself towards the ground, landing on one hand like he’s doing a handstand, and then kicks his legs out in a cartwheel kick. He’s so smooth with it, inverting himself like it’s nothing, that you actually gasp.

It’s like he cranked the volume up on the crowd, and someone - Rosé, maybe? - starts chanting Jungkook’s name. You can’t help but add your voice to the mix. 

Jungkook lands back on his feet and motions for Jin to go. Jin also takes his jacket off, jaw clenching firmly. He rolls his body a few times before bouncing into the Roger Rabbit, feet stepping quickly, arms flapping at his side like wings. It’s surprisingly loose and funky, two words you don’t typically associate with Jin. 

Lisa yells, “Go chef!” and the crowd divides itself into two chants. Jin ends his turn with a little flourish, dusting imaginary dirt from his broad shoulders. But you know from Jungkook’s smirk that he’s undaunted, and without a second’s hesitation, he swiftly dives to the floor, launching himself into a windmill.

Your friends explode into cheers, watching Jungkook roll round and round the floor. As he picks up speed, he tucks his arms up onto his stomach, doing the trick with no hands. Then he comes to a stop with a freeze, legs hanging in the air. 

The crowd chants Jungkook’s name only as he rises to his feet. He straightens his tie, then gestures to Jin. Jin rocks for a few beats, a strange look in his eye. 

Then he throws his hands out in front of him, holding one steady while the other mimics winding a reel. 

“Is he - is he fishing for Jungkook?” 

You don’t answer Rosé as there’s no need to. Jin’s clearly doing the fishing pole move. One by one, the voices around you grow quieter. Jungkook blinks at Jin for a few seconds, obviously thrown by this decision.

Then he grins, flapping his hands by his face like fins.

“Oh, wow, they share a brain cell,” Lisa says. “Did not see that coming.” 

Jisoo groans. “Well, this is anticlimactic. I was promised bloodshed.” 

“Who promised you that?” you ask, laughing. Feeling a tiny bit relieved. 

The crowd departs, but the two men keep dancing. Jungkook pretends he’s been hooked, thrashing from side-to-side before dropping to the ground in his signature dolphin kick. Always a performer to the end, you think, as he hops back to his feet, and he and Jin take turns bowing to one another. 

The smile on his face gets wider when Jungkook sees you clapping for him. He reaches for his jacket, and you impulsively press a kiss to his cheek, biting back a laugh as his eyes widen slightly.

“If those are the moves you pull out for a dance-off, I can’t wait to see what you’ve got planned for later,” you whisper. Jungkook’s arm grips your side as he tilts his head to look at you. His touch is warm, but it can’t match the heat in his eyes. 

“Careful what you ask for, jagiya,” he replies, gaze dropping to your mouth so briefly that you almost miss it. “I need some water. Do you want anything?” 

You shake your head, and he disappears towards the tables. As soon as he’s gone, you feel someone brush your arm. 

“Okay, I’ll give it to the kid - he’s got moves,” Jin declares, holding his hand out in an offer to dance. You silently take it, letting him pull you close as the deejay cues up a ballad. 

Jin’s quiet for a few beats, leading you in small circles around the dance floor. It strikes you that this is the first time the two of you have really been face-to-face since yesterday, that weird standoff in the hallway earlier notwithstanding. You haven’t had a chance to talk to him alone since - 

“So what’s up with your boy?” 

You meet Jin’s gaze with a raised eyebrow. “Jungkook? What do you mean?”

Jin shrugs, the movement jostling your hand where it rests on his shoulder. “I mean, he looked like he was ready to throw hands when he introduced himself earlier. Like he was just itching for a fight.” 

“And you’re not?” You snort when he blinks in exaggerated confusion. “Oh, come on, all those snide little comments you were making at the table? Arguing with him about who has it worse? What was that all about?” 

Jin maintains his affronted expression for half a minute longer before he starts to laugh. “Okay, fine, I admit I was just pushing his buttons at dinner. In my defense, he made it too easy!” He laughs harder when you roll your eyes and start to pull away. “Okay, okay, I’m sorry. But I had to do something to cheer myself up. It wasn’t easy for me to sit there and watch the two of you together, to see the way you look at him.” 

Your curiosity tampers down your annoyance for a moment. “How do I look at him?” 

Jin smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Like there’s no one else in the world.” 

You glance away, unsure what to say to that. Your gaze flits around the room until it lands on Jungkook, finding him at one of the tables, chatting with Lisa and Yi-jeong. His nose crinkles as he laughs with your friend, tattooed hand coming up to swipe away the hair that falls into his face, and you hear Jin sigh. 

“Yeah, that’s the look,” he says, shaking his head. He shifts his arm from your back, leading you into a gentle spin. “I was honestly surprised at how easy it was to antagonize him. Figured nothing I could do or say would bother him, knowing he won your heart.”

When you don’t respond to that, staring at Jin’s bowtie instead of meeting his eye, he hums. 

“Oh, I see. You haven’t told him yet.” 

Without warning, Jin dips you. You gasp, clutching his bicep to steady yourself.

“Are you having second thoughts?” he murmurs. His hand grips yours tightly, arm cradles your back, keeping you in place while his face hovers a mere breath above yours. 

It’s an intimate pose, the way he holds you now, yet just like yesterday, you feel nothing.

“No. No second thoughts.” You’ve recovered from your momentary shock, voice steady as you reply. “I’m sorry, Jin, but like I told you yesterday, it’s Jungkook I want.” 

Immediately, you’re back on your feet. 

“Yeah, I didn’t think so.” Jin grins a crooked grin. “Had to ask, though.” 

You roll your eyes. “I’m starting to regret this whole ‘let’s be friends’ idea.” 

He ignores your jibe. “Can I ask you a serious question?” 

You take a moment to study his face before answering. All traces of humor have vanished as he waits for your response. Slowly, you nod. 

“What are you waiting for?” 

The rooftop garden glows softly in the night air, lit by tiny lights strung along the trees and flowering plants. Hidden speakers strewn around the open space bring the music from the reception outside, providing a gentle soundtrack for a beautiful summer evening. 

“Where are we going?” Jungkook asks, hand clasped firmly in yours as you lead him out of the reception and across the garden. 

In the corner of the roof, there’s a small nook carved out between two potted cherry blossoms, their branches obscuring the two of you from any of the other guests milling about. Right now, you need a little privacy.

You also need a moment to gather your thoughts. Your stomach’s jumped into your throat at the thought of what you’re about to do, and your anxiousness makes it hard to think straight. It doesn’t help that you’re slightly distracted by the sight in front of you. 

Although the sun’s long since set, the air is still warm. Jungkook’s shed his jacket, has his tie loosened, sleeves rolled to his elbows, hand still in yours as he looks at you expectantly, patiently waiting for you to speak. You can see the moon reflecting in his bright eyes, and for a moment, you’re back in the elevator at your apartment, staring at your handsome neighbor, that shy man with the sweet smile.

It wasn’t that long ago that he was a total stranger. Someone you saw occasionally at the mailboxes, someone who regularly ran away when you tried to talk to him. You didn’t know anything about him back then - what he did, what he liked, what made him laugh. What his kisses felt like. 

It wasn’t that long ago, yet it already feels like a distant memory. One that you never want to return to. Knowing everything you know about him now, feeling everything you feel - you can’t go back. There’s only one thing you need to do now - tell him. 

No reason to wait a second longer. 

Taking a deep breath, you squeeze his hand. “Jungkook, I brought you out here because I wanted to tell you something. I’m… ah, I’m not very good at this kind of thing, but I’m gonna try because I don’t want to drag this out when I don’t need to.” 

Jungkook’s eyebrows twitch slightly, but he doesn’t say anything, so you go on. 

“You know how I went to Jennie’s yesterday? Um, Jin was also there, with Yoongi. He pulled me aside and told me that the job Wendy asked me to interview for is actually his show for Nosh. And then he started talking about the two of us working together and traveling and -”

“Choose me, jagiya.” 

“Huh?” 

His interruption throws you off from the rambly mess you were attempting to say. Jungkook reaches for your other hand, holding both against his chest, and gives you a shaky smile. 

“Choose me, jagi. I know I don’t have a career like Seokjin does, or his money, or - or even a guarantee that I’ll ever have either of those things. I probably can’t promise you most of the things he can.” He pauses to draw a long breath, like he’s trying to slow himself down and not rush over his words, and oh, you want to kiss him so much right now. Even if this isn’t how it’s supposed to go. “But I can promise y-”

“No no!” It’s his turn to look surprised as you raise your hands to his mouth, muffling his speech. “Jungkook, stop! I was trying to tell you that I ended things with Jin yesterday. You don’t have to say another word because it’s over.” 

“Mmt’s omer?” he mumbles against your fingers, eyes widening. 

“Yes, it’s over,” you giggle, uncovering his mouth, and suddenly all of your nervousness floats away on the evening breeze. “Come on, Kookie. Don’t you know? I’ve already chosen. It’s you. It’s always been you.” 

Jungkook continues to stare at you with those big doe eyes as your words slowly sink in, and you can’t help but smile, fondly, so, so fondly, that familiar sensation of warmth surging up from your chest, and you know now that it has a name, that buzz, that elation, that euphoria, and it’s on the tip of your tongue, just waiting for you to breathe it to life. 

So you exhale. 

“I think I’m falling in love with you.” 

For just the slightest of moments - a fraction of a second, a single heartbeat - when he doesn’t do anything, doesn’t so much as blink or breathe, you’re scared you’ve said too much. It’s too soon, too fast, too everything. 

But then he wraps his arms around you, holding you close enough that you can feel his own heart thumping wildly within his chest, and puts your fears to rest with four simple words, whispered softly against your lips.  

“Jagi, I’ve already fallen.” 

He kisses you, soft and slow, every touch so full of tenderness that you could cry. You tangle your fingers in his hair, desperately seeking something to hold onto, to keep you from floating right off the roof. He’s fallen for you. Jungkook’s fallen for you. 

You never knew your heart could hold so much. 

All your nervousness from before has dissipated. Now the only reason your pulse races is the nearness of him.

“Are you in any hurry to get back in there?” he asks, tipping his head towards the party.

You shake your head. 

He smiles. “Good.” 

He takes your hand again, locking his other arm around your back. You lay your head on his shoulder and close your eyes, listening to him sing along lightly with the music drifting across the rooftop. Even when the song changes to something more uptempo, he doesn’t let go, just laces his fingers through yours and continues to sway with you beneath the stars. 

Many songs later, when the two of you finally return to the party, you find that it’s already winding down. Jennie and Yoongi are making their rounds to say goodbye, needing to go home  and pack for their trip to Jeju Island in the morning. 

Jennie grabs your arm and pulls you away from Jungkook, waving the other bridesmaids over. “I’m gonna do it tonight!” 

Jisoo pinches her cheek. “Babe, you’ve already done it. That’s why you’re late, remember?” 

“Ha, ha.” Jennie smacks her hand away. “I mean I’m gonna tell Yoongi I’m pregnant, smartass.” 

“Ah, I’m so excited for you!” Lisa gives her a hug, and then you’re all hugging. 

“Have you all had a good time tonight?” Jennie asks, not waiting for an answer. “This has been the most amazing day! Thank you for everything, I couldn’t have done this without you.” 

“Yes, you could have,” you grin. 

“Okay, true, I could have. But it wouldn’t have been as much fun without you all. I love you so much!” 

“We love you too. Now go celebrate with your husband!” Rosé giggles, emphasizing the last word with an energetic wiggle of her eyebrows. 

“Yeah, get out of here. Some of us have plans tonight but we can’t leave until you do.” Jisoo declares. 

“She makes a good point,” Lisa chimes in, glancing over her shoulder at where Yi-jeong sits alone, clearly waiting. 

“Wow, okay,” Jennie laughs, but she’s flying too high to really be mad. “I’ll see you all in a week!” 

It’s as you turn to walk back to Jungkook that you remember. 

“Oh! Lisa!” 

Your friend glances at you as you back away with a giant grin. 

“Pay Rosé her fifty bucks.” 

“Why are your friends screaming like that?” Jungkook asks when you rejoin him. 

You just smile and press a soft kiss to his cheek. “Ready to get out of here?” 

Riding Jungkook’s motorcycle is a much more pleasant experience tonight than it was on your way home from your first date. The sky is clear above you as Jungkook expertly weaves through traffic, and you’re warm and dry sitting behind him, wearing his suit jacket, arms tight around his waist. You spend most of the ride hugging more than holding on to him. 

Every few blocks, he releases the hand grip to let his palm rest on your thigh for a moment, squeezing gently. You think he means it as a reassuring touch, knowing how shaky you are with the entire concept of motorcycles to begin with, how just the thought of riding one still makes you nervous, but the actual effect he's having on you is far from comforting. It’s driving you insane.

By the time you reach your apartment door, you’re feral with need. You toss Jungkook’s jacket onto the floor and Jungkook lets out a surprised yelp when you tug on his arm as he’s closing the door. He barely has a chance to turn the lock before you’re pulling him down, passionately kissing away his confused noise. 

“B-baby,” he finally manages to stammer out after a few minutes of intense making out, “baby, do you wanna move to the couch?” 

You shake your head. “Need you now.” 

“Yeah?” His eyes are so dark that it makes you shudder when he catches your gaze. “Always so needy for me, huh? Just like the first time?” 

You remember that night, the way he’d fucked you against the hallway wall, both of you too desperate to even make it another ten feet to your bed. That same greedy desire burns through you now. 

Thank god for the slit in your dress. Hitching your leg up, you wrap it around his back, guiding him back down on top of you. 

“Just like that,” your voice trembles, back arching as Junghook’s hand snakes between you, rubbing at you through your dress. “Ahh, fuck, just like that!” 

You grasp at the side zipper on the dress, fingers fumbling too much to yank it down as quickly as you want. Jungkook has to do it for you, helping you sit up long enough to shed the entire gown. 

He sucks in a sharp breath. “Jagi.” 

If you weren’t already dying for him, the expression on his face when he sees you in the lingerie you’re wearing beneath your dress would do it. 

“Does it look better in person?” you ask, running your fingers over your chest, thumbs pressing in slow circles to wake your nipples, feeling them swell beneath the lace. 

With a pained groan, Jungkook starts hurriedly tearing at his suit, throwing the items nearly halfway across the open space of your living room in his urgency, not stopping until he’s completely naked, cock already hardening between his legs. 

“Yeah,” he grunts, biting his lip to let his hands do the talking. They travel over your torso, up across your breasts, squeezing your hands so you grip yourself harder. He laughs at your little gasp, and then he’s swallowing your sounds with his eager mouth, knocking your legs apart with his knee so he can press his body to yours. 

Your own impatience has you hooking your calves the backs of his thighs, bending your knees to urge him nearer. But no matter how close he is to you, it’s not enough, an itch you can’t scratch no matter how much you try. 

“I think this is going to have to come off now,” you frown, tugging at your bodice. You need to feel him, skin-to-skin. 

“Oh, not yet,” Jungkook says, voice near enough to be a growl. “Please, jagi, keep it on a little longer. For me.” He looks at you with such a lustful gaze that you find yourself nodding, immediately caving to his wish. If he wants to fuck you in your lingerie, fine. There will be more time to feel him later. 

There will be more time for everything you want with Jungkook. 

His mouth reconnects with yours. You sigh into him as his fingers find the snaps at the crotch of the teddy. He’s not gentle with them, practically ripping them open, but he’s more delicate as he slides his finger into you, finding you just as wet as always. He plunges two fingers in, and you know he’s trying to take his time and make sure you’re ready, but you’re too impatient for his consideration right now. 

“Come on, Kookie,” you plead, cupping his chin to draw his gaze away from his work, “I’m ready. I need you now.” 

“Shit,” he mutters, clearly reading your frustration. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah. I wanna feel you.” 

He reaches for his pants, which have been flung over the back of the couch, and you stop him.

“No, I mean, I want to feel you.”

Jungkook swallows hard, his Adam’s apple visibly bobbing. “Jesus Christ, jagiya, you’re going to kill me.” He kisses you again, before his expression turns serious. “Can we? I mean, are you on something -” 

Laughing, you grab his face again, pulling him back to you for another kiss. 

“I have an implant. And I haven’t been with anyone since you and I have been…” you trail off, unsure what to call it. Dating? “Not since the last time I was tested.” 

“No one?” He doesn’t say the name, but you know what he’s asking. 

“No one.” You and Seokjin never got that far.

“I haven’t been with anyone either.” Jungkook strokes his thumb along your cheek. “It’s just been you. You’re the only one I want.” 

“Then have me.” With another sigh, you lift your hips, rolling against him. 

Jungkook groans, and you barely have a second to breathe before his lips take yours again. There’s some shifting, you spreading your legs while he’s propping himself up on one elbow and lining himself up with his other hand, and then he’s sinking in, slowly, filling you up hot inch by hot inch, until he’s completely sheathed. 

You got your wish. You can feel all of him. It’s a new sensation, and it’s intense, but you can tell it’s even more so for him. 

“Oh, goddamn, jagi.” Jungkook presses his forehead to yours. His chest heaves as he holds himself completely still. “You’re so - fuck.” 

“Yeah? Is it that good?” 

He nods a little, eyes squeezing shut, and you run your fingers through his hair, trying to impart some comfort. As much as you want him to rail you through the floor right now, you don’t want to rush him anymore. 

“Does it really feel that different?”

Jungkook shakes his head. “It’s not that. That’s part of it - you feel so fucking good, baby - but it’s - it’s…” He huffs out a short breath, shaking his head again. “I don’t know how to say it. It’s everything.” 

And you understand exactly what he means, not by whatever he’s trying and failing to say, but by the look in his eyes. 

“Oh,” is all you can say, feeling your own words slipping away from you, as he starts to move. 

His cock drags slowly, so slowly at first, his head bowing as he concentrates on the feeling of you, the way your cunt seems to suck him back in eagerly, walls clenching when he snaps his hips experimentally. He observes every breath that escapes you, every mewl and whimper, and adjusts his pace, the strength of his thrusts, all the while drowning in his own perception, the tight heat and wetness of your core making his eyes roll back in his head with each pump. 

Neither of you speak after that, but you don’t need to. Your bodies communicate everything you’re feeling, punctuated by the unrestrained noises you both make. Your nails rake down Jungkook’s back as he fucks into you, drawing whine after whine from him, broken cries of desire, of wanting you to hold him, claim him, just as he’s claiming you. Mine, your fingernails declare, inscribing his skin with scratches. Yours, his hips answer in return, powerfully driving into yours, connecting you again and again, faster and faster. 

His hand clutches at the thigh you’ve wrapped around his waist, fingers twisting around the garter straps, and you can tell from his unsteady panting that he’s close. Your own pleasure is nearing the precipice, but you know he’s going to reach his first. Which he confirms with a strangled whimper.

“Jagi, I’m - I’m gonna come,” he grits through his teeth, brow furrowed, like he’s focusing all his energy on not coming right then and there. “‘M sorry, I can’t stop, I can’t - “

“Don’t stop, Kookie, don’t stop!” You don’t care if he finishes first. This isn’t about just sex anymore. All you want is for him to feel as good as he makes you feel, all the time. “Come on, cum inside me. Give me everything, fill me up!” 

“Fuck!” he grunts, moaning your name, and with only a few more thrusts, he follows your command. His hips jerk wildly as he gives in to the burning need beneath his skin and fills you with his hot release. It seems to go on and on, until he’s gasping, sagging against you weakly, too wrung out to hold himself up any longer. “Holy shit.”

You just hum, stroking his sweat-soaked hair, until he finally lifts his head. 

“I’m sorry,” he says. “I got caught up in the moment. Too much going on in my head and - and, fuck, you felt too good.” He gives you a sheepish smile.

You shush his apologies with a laugh, wrapping your arms around him again, urging him to lay down, so his head rests on your chest. “You don’t have to explain. It’s been… it’s been a long time since I’ve felt anything like this.” 

He sighs, moving slightly so he can leave light kisses over your covered chest. “Me too.” His hand trails lazily down your torso, following the swirls in the lace’s pattern. “I’m glad you said what you did. On the roof. I wanted to tell you before how I felt, but I was afraid you’d think I was rushing things.” His voice gets quieter. “It wouldn’t be the first time.” 

There’s a sadness in his tone, a naked vulnerability that makes your heart ache, so you squeeze him a little tighter. You know exactly what he means. 

He raises his head a little, starts kissing his way down your stomach. “Are you still…”

“Am I still what?” You bite your lip as he reaches the apex of your thighs, gently nudging them further apart so he can lie in between. 

Jungkook presses soft kisses to your inner thighs, one side, then the other, before he looks up at you. “Was that enough for you or are you still wanting more? You were so needy earlier, jagiya.” 

Of course you still want more. You don’t think you’ll ever get enough of him. 

“Yeah,” you say, your fingers combing his hair out of his face so there’s nothing hiding him from you, just as there’s nothing hiding you from him, “I want more. Please, Kookie.” 

The smirk that spreads across his lovestruck face sends your heart racing. Your back arches off the floor when he coaxes the first orgasm from you with his tongue, feels like it might snap in half by the time he pulls the second one with his fingers. 

You melt into his embrace afterward, so thoroughly satiated, so utterly content, that you nearly fall asleep. But Jungkook coaxes you off the floor and into the bathroom, to wash his back in the shower before he tenderly scrubs yours, and then into bed, where the last thing you see before closing your eyes is the smile on his face as he whispers good night. 

“What does this one mean?” 

It’s late. Very late, sometime between midnight and early morning, when you should be asleep. You’d awoken in need of some water, slipping out carefully, trying not to wake Jungkook, only to come back to find him up and waiting for you to return to bed. He wasn’t just awake but up up, and you couldn’t resist, climbing directly into his lap for a slow, lazy ride. 

Now, you’re lying together, back pressed to Jungkook’s chest, with his arm draped beneath your breasts, as he gives you a tour of his tattoos. He tells you that most are symbolic, but a few have stories behind them, and you listen raptly to each one. Even though he’s probably tired, he’s indulging you, answering all your questions without so much as a single yawn.

He tilts his head to look at where you’re tapping on a striped snake. “That one? That’s supposed to represent growth. You know, shedding my skin, like a snake.” He flexes his forearm and the snake moves as if undulating on its own. “Do you like snakes?” 

“I like them a lot more than spiders, I can tell you that,” you reply, giggling. 

He laughs, watching silently as your fingers roam over his skin. There’s so much ink covering him, and you’re dying to know about all of it, filled with a buzzing curiosity despite the late hour. 

“What about this one?” Gingerly, you trace over the orange tiger lily etched onto the inside of his forearm, as if afraid that pressing too harshly will cause the petals to crumple. It’s gorgeously vibrant, the glowing color popping vividly against his skin. 

“Ah, that’s my birth flower.” Jungkook laughs a quick laugh. “That one was actually Taehyung’s suggestion. Do you know what the flower is supposed to represent?” 

“Uh-uh.” 

“Self-confidence.” He laughs again, shaking you a little as his chest vibrates. “He said it’d be a good reminder when he’s not around, that I still need to be confident.”

“Taehyung’s a good friend,” you remark, and Jungkook hums in assent. He rubs mindlessly at the flower with his other hand, fingertips bumping against yours. 

“You know, there’s another reason I got this one. A hidden meaning that tiger lilies are meant to express.” 

“Ooh, a hidden meaning?” You tilt your head to peer at him. “And what’s that?” 

Even in the dim light from your bedside lamp, you can see the tips of Jungkook’s ears turning red as he smiles bashfully, his eyes crinkling when he answers. “Please love me.” 

It’s impossible to resist kissing him, kissing that shy bunny smile that you’ve adored all this time, so you don’t even try, cupping his cheeks gently while you brush his lips with yours. When you pull away, his face is flushed, and he laughs, dipping his head in embarrassment even as he whispers, “Keep going.” 

You giggle, and kiss him again, and then stop. “Oh! Wait a minute.” 

Jungkook lets out a small grunt of displeasure when you leave his embrace, but you return quickly, handing him a small frame from your desk. 

“Jagi, you framed this?” He stares through the glass at the tiger lily sketch he’d drawn for you, back when he asked you out on your first date.

“Well, yeah. It was too pretty not to.” 

You take your place between his legs again, his arm automatically sliding around your waist while he gazes at the picture. “But it was just a quick little drawing. It’s not my best work.” 

“So? I think it’s beautiful. And… it’s from you.” You can feel your neck warming as you speak. “I like to keep it on my desk when I’m working. Every time I get annoyed by something, I look at it, and it calms me down.” Your lips quirk in a little smile. “So you can imagine that I look at it a lot,” you say, half-joking, half-not. Because it’s true, you do stare at it a lot. The drawing always brings you peace. Because it reminds you of Jungkook. So fiery and bright, but also so lovely and delicate. 

“Jagi,” Jungkook says again, swallowing thickly. His arm squeezes you closer.

You take the frame from his hand, placing it on the nightstand, before shifting to face him, legs straddling his as you loop your arms around his neck. “Be honest - were you sending me a hidden message with this?” 

His ears are burning red again. “Maybe. Guess it worked.” 

You surge forward, kissing the cheeky smile right off his face. His hands settle on your hips, holding you tightly, as if right now there’s any danger of you leaving. There’s nowhere else you’d rather be, with no one else. 

But you’re also wondering something you’ve been wondering for a while now, and since he’s been so obliging so far, you decide to ask him one more question. “Can I ask you something?”

“Jagi, all you’ve been doing is asking me questions,” Jungkook grins. 

You roll your eyes at his teasing tone. “Yeah, okay, I just mean, can I ask about something that doesn’t have anything to do with your tattoos?” 

He nods. 

“If I hadn’t come to Paradise with my friends that night, would you ever have made a move?”

He clearly wasn’t expecting that question, judging by the look on his face. His eyes fall out of focus as they stare unseeing at you, and you know he’s lost in thought. You give him the time to find his way to an answer, running your fingers through his hair soothingly while you wait.

“I don’t know,” he finally admits. “I’d like to think that yes, I would’ve gotten up the nerve to talk to you. But it might’ve taken a while. Seeing you at Paradise kind of gave me an opening.”

“I think this still would’ve happened,” you tell him, suddenly filled with an unusual amount of confidence, bolstered by his hands on your waist, his eyes locked on yours, “all of this. I think we would’ve ended up just like this.” 

“How do you know that?”

“I would’ve worn you down at the mailboxes,” you grin. “At the rate we were going, it probably would’ve taken a decade, but we’d get there eventually.” 

He laughs, hands locking behind your back as he holds you close. “Or maybe I would’ve shown up at your door one night and danced for you. Maybe that’s what I did in another universe.” 

“I’m sure it worked,” you murmur, leaning closer to his lips. “I think in any universe, we end up like this. We’re just lucky that we got here so fast.” 

“The luckiest,” he agrees, closing the space between you. 

When you finally fall asleep again, you dream of falling through other universes, following the same dark eyes and wicked smirk through each.

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