#this show feels like a fanfic fever dream

[black-rose-writings]

Things I have gathered about Danny Phanton without having ever watched the show (from posts and fanfics):

There's ghosts and they're kind of assholes, but they're also all friends and have christmas parties. Their presence is treated as a mild annoyance by everyone except the ghost hunters.

The main character is a dead 14yo. Sometimes. He's also trans.

There are adult professional ghost hunters around. Literally all of them seem like they are just taking out their serial killer urges on ghosts. "Man is the real monster" trope in action. At least some of the ghost hunters are a Men In Black parody.

The dead 14yo actually the most competent at removing ghosts from the mortal plane.

There is another 14yo who is not dead and also hunting ghosts. She's somehow also more competent at it than the adults.

The MC's parents are ghost hunters and want to torture him into perma-death. That is somehow not the biggest problem with their parenting.

(Like, I get that adults in kids' media need to be kinda dumb and immature for the premise of the show/book/movie/whatever to work, but I'm getting the feeling the adults in this show cross the line of 'plot necessary dumbass' into 'fucked up and abusive' territorry.)

One of the ghosts is tiny, piloting a giant mecha suit and dedicated to skinning the MC and hanging his skin on his wall. He somehow also has a cool rocker girlfriend and thinks this will impress her. Jury's out on whether or not that's a good strategy.

There is a ghost called the Box Ghost, who demands to be taken seriously. Nobody takes him seriously.

The MC's nemesis is another dude who is sometimes dead. He looks like a vampire and swears in food. He also wants to kill the MC's dad (for mostly valid reasons) and bang his mom (for no good reason at all) and adopt the MC as his son(mostly because of his hangups around the parents, not because said parents suck at being parents). In a villainous and fucked up way, because he's the main antagonists. He's also a billionaire, has a cat, and is weirdly obsessed with american football (IDK jack shit about american football, but the level of obsession is treated as not normal by the characters so I will assume it is weird and just how americans be like).

There were 3 seasons, but half of the fandom is convinced the third one may have been a fever dream because it's so bad.

There was a finale that everyone pretends didn't happen because it sucked.

There is at least one time travel fix it episode and the time travel ghost wears way too many watches.

The MC has two living friends - Wade from Kim Possible, but thinner and leaves his house, and a jewish goth vegan.

The MC has a clone and she's a baby and a gremlin.

The ships all have the weirdest fucking names.

Somehow half the named characters being dead is not the angstiest part of the show.

I kinda want to know how someone came up with it and what drugs they were taking. IDK if I want to try some or avoid them, but it would be good to know either way.

[thefudge]

haven’t watched s4 of the umbrella academy but i know five and lila kissing there omg if only every tv show and book have listened to our weird ships…

okay so i spent the last few hours speed-running through this season and OH MY GOD not only did they pay attention to our weird ship, but it's like INCREDIBLE levels of fanfic!!! like, the YEARNING alone??? like, okay, the writers did the "stuck in a time bubble together" bonding/romance storyline, but what i loved about it is they planted the seeds early in the season with lila not only feeling stuck in her marriage but sneaking out and running into five and having fun with him sleuthing just like in past seasons!!! like, it's not just "we're only now seeing each other's potential because we're stuck in the subway" it's more like "we've always been kindred spirits and now we have some down time to really let that sink in". it feels like the culmination of their evolution from enemies to frenemies to friends to lovers??? like all that friction from past seasons finally coming to fruition. hell, at one point five even straight up tells her diego can't give her what she needs??? like, they're admitting they're happier together and fit better together, in and outside of the time loop!!! and i love love LOVE the writers for not doing the super tired switcheroo where, once lila returns to diego and her family she suddenly realizes the whole thing with five was a fever dream. NO!!! no no no, all the feelings are still there like AAAAH it's such good angst, because she keeps exchanging loaded and uncomfortable glances with five while diego is trying to hold her/kiss her??? and five looks SO upset??? it's ao3 levels of delicious drama!!!! diego even asks her if she loves five and she CANNOT deny it, and her whole family and kids are right there but!!!! they still have these feelings and i love how shameless the show is about it!!! one of the big subplots of the final episode is lila having to give up her family to sacrifice herself, but it's also framed as her choosing five and just sort of collapsing in his arms telling him she hates him for this??? and he says "i know"??? HELLO??? also just the yearning and pining even mid-apocalypse!!!! five can't focus on anything else except her, literally they're all about to die but their lil drama is still going on!!!! (complete with diego and five punching each other and rolling on the floor fighting over lila!!!!) it's SO good. also props to the five actor for truly LOCKING IN and just leaning so much into the yearning. every second he looks at lila it's like she hung the moon and he is dying to be with her. i JUSTTTTTTT and the fact that lila hates bracelets and she didn't wear the one diego got her for valentine's, but she wears five's???? and loves it??? and he made it out of all the scrap metal for her???? soooo many little moments like that!!! when he says "i aim to please" kneeling in front of her????? when he says "you know why" when she asks him why he kept the notebook with the escape plan from her!!!!! he just wanted to be with her forever in the greenhouse timeline GAAAAAH. like, this is now gonna be my standard for "non-canonical ships that didn't seem like they could ever have a chance but became canon anyway"!!! cuz usually we clock the chemistry and the banter and the connection but we have to make do with our lil AUs because we know the writers wouldn't dare. but they did!!! they did it this time!!! GOD BLESS i feel so validated in this chili's tonight!!!

[archivedblog16]

3 things to say:

1- "being gay is when a married man cheat on wife with another man"- vivziepop's logic (her lgbtq representation is very conservative if you think about it)

2- I feel like fans know that vivziepop's writing is bullshit and full of pilot holes but they Don't care about it as long there's characters to fuck *cough* loona *cough*,people underestimate the power of horny lol and to this day I still don't understand the hype and praise for loona but this is how Internet works I guess

3- I usually don't care about ships and strange kinks as long it stays fictional and no real person is involved in it BUT i hate it when a creator push it in their "morality teaching shows" it's where I draw the line like you either make serious show about taking abuse seriously to spread awareness or a weird fever dream kink show made for gooners to enjoy, you can't have it both,vivziepop made hypersexuals look like bunch of freaks and stigmatised them even more. "Please guys have sympathy for this character for getting sexually harassed but please don't blame him for sexually harassing others cause trauma made him hypersexual and you have to deal with it, he's just coping!" Like wtf are you serious? There's different ways to coping with trauma including drawing fetishes and kinks and i see no problem with it but harassing others is not coping you are just being peirce of shit, her morality is so flawed what is she even trying to tell audience? Victims of SA become assholes and have free card to harassing others? Wtf? And Yes I am a proshipper and I hate HH/HB because I hate it when a show tell you it's ok to cheat and it's ok to sexually harassing others why? because you said that this show is meant to represent victims but you only made victims feel embarrassed even more about themselves and you backstabbed them like don't you realise when you say your shows is about victims your victims watch the show to feel comfortable and feel being understood only for them seeing angel dust being asshole and sir.pentious getting SA'd as a joke? where's the SA awareness? Like yes we know victims who read SA fanfic as coping exist but not all of them cope the same way and we thought you would tell us how terrible SA can be and how it effects victims horribly ,not using trauma to excuse their shitty behaviours? I hate seeing people getting hurt and I don't want to be near someone telling me that them being asshole is ok because "HB is like bojack horseman and told me it's ok because X And Y" like stfu if you truly know anything about bojack horseman you wouldn't even think of comparing the two also you're an adult and if a dumb cartoon made you harassing others then you weren't good person in the first place you bastard maybe talk to therapy instead because creating trauma to others will never help you also not to mention half of fanbase of HH/HB are minors thanks to lazyass parents and society gaslighting everyone with "if it's cartoon then it's for kids" but the audience is out of vivziepop's control do i am not gonna blame her for this one but all i know is that unlike adults who are aware and responsible for their actions minors brain is not fully developed and they can be misguided most of times so i am worried about them growing up with vivziepop's 'morality' so i don't know the solution of who is watching cartoon and i think we should normalizing shaming lazy parents like don't be a parent if you would just let internet babysitting your child instead of you doing it yourself parenting is called parenting for a reason you're called "parent" not "birth giver", why am I proshipper? Because I don't care about others ships but I don't like the She-ra's "lesbians can't be abusive! You must feel bad for your abuser and you owe them everything and you should forgive them" Message and vivziepop's "if you're in straight marriage and you find out you're gay just cheat oh and if you have trauma it's ok to be asshole" Message (I hope you understand what I am trying to say and I hope you understand we have same goals before you tell me I am terrible as abusers just because i don't care about others ships and believing that fictional things doesn't matter as long it's fictional)

Alright I am done,scream at me I guess

The fans would also fill in the holes regarding Helluva Boss and doesn’t help that Vivziepop would like tweets about it. Don’t like tweets of your fans defending your show. Put and write it into your dialogue not on Twitter 😭

Yeah, Vivziepop has a huge problem of wanting her cake and eating it. Like what you mentioned Anon, the sexual assault jokes then another moment taking it seriously. Rinse and repeat. The moral compass in Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss is so wish-washy.

Successfully killed straight married couple. Cool. Oh no, Blitzø doesn’t have the guts to kill a gay couple. Woahh apparently it’s character development (despite Blitzø fighting over a parking lot like an Anon in my last ask mentioned, happily participating in a Wrath competition in Millie’s hometown, killing lumberjacks, happily will screw over the cherubs, etc etc).

Most of the characters especially if a character is Vivziepop’s favorite, don’t get held accountable and when they do have a chance to be called out, it’s usually downgraded in some way or there is some excuse in said action.

Its funny you bring up the children in Hazbin Hotel/Helluva Boss because there was literally a situation where like what a 9-10 year old was at a Hazbin convention asking Blake Roman an inappropriate question regarding Angel Dust. It is so mind boggling to watch. Hazbin and Helluva are supposed to be for adults (+18) but the both shows don’t seem adult despite covering big topics like rape, kinks, etc. It feels like 2 kids in a trench coat attempting to sneak into a R rated movie.

At the day it’s the parent’s responsibility and they should be called out. It also doesn’t help that a few voice actors like Amir encourage kids and parents to watch Hazbin Hotel, despite Vivziepop expressing multiple times it’s for adults. I don’t know if he changed his mind about kids accessing Hazbin Hotel but I hope he does.

Vivziepop could potentially age gate Helluva Boss (I’m not talking about the warning sequence from Helluva Boss that flashes for 5-10 seconds every episode). But like manually do this:

But Vivziepop would lose some more views if that happened. Otherwise there isn’t much she can do.

[melanieph321]

Do you have any Josko Gvardiol fanfic coming soon

Of course!

10 DAYS OF REQUESTS

(DAY 5)

Joško Gvardiol - Not Romantic

+18

Summary - Reader wants Joško to be more romantic. Unfortunately, he listens to her.

Enjoy 💞

He wasn't the date night kind. Nor the surprise you with flowers kind. Joško was simply the hug you from behind kind while whispering filthy promises in your ear. But would it really kill him to be a tad more romantic?

"Yes." He answered.

"It would?"

The two of you were just about to go to bed after yet another hectic day, making the timing of your question utterly bizarre to Joško.

"Y/N, what does it even mean to be romantic? Am I not romantic?"

"No Joško, you are not. Slapping me in the ass in the grocery store a mids the dry goods, does not count for romance. I want flowers and perhaps a more gentle approach to our love and affection for one another. Is that too much to ask for?"

Joško seemed puzzled, his bushy eyebrows low on his forhead. "So you want me to be gentle....in bed?"

"Ugh!" You sighed, roughly uncovering the duvet, tucking yourself into bed.

"Oh, come on baby. Don't be like that." Joško went on to dim the lights in your room before joining you in bed. He reached for you under the covers, however you refused him by shifting to lay on your side.

"If romance is too much of an ask and effort for you, I don't really see the point with us being together."

Joško stiffened with your words, the silence that followed a bit nerve-wracking. However, you stood your ground and fell asleep convinced that this was the necessary change that would sustain your relationship.

The next morning you woke up in bed alone. Joško had left for an early training session, however, his early endearments still tickled your ear. "I'm sorry that I'm not enough for you. But don't worry, I'll show you."

It broke your heart that your argument last night resulted in Joško feeling like he wasn't enough for you. That was never your case in point. You were just demanding a bit more sensual awareness from your boyfriend. What else could you have said that would've made him understand?

"Babe, I'm home."

"Joško?"

A whole day had gone by since you last saw your boyfriend, and being off from work definitely didn't mend your anxious mind. You spent the day cleaning your apartment while waiting for him to come home. Seeing Joško standing in the door, flowers in one hand and takeout in the other, instantly melted your heart.

"Oh, baby. Are those for me?" You approached him where he stood, accepting the flowers that were handed to you.

"You told me to be more romantic, didn't you?" He bent down and pressed a gentle kiss to your lips. However, a deep growl escaped his mouth as the kiss naturally deepend.

It took Joško everything not to escalate the situation by stripping you of your clothes right then and there.

"Dinner." He drunkenly rumbled, dragging his nose along the skin of your collarbone. "It might get cold."

"Right, dinner." You were slurring on your words, perhaps as infatuated by your boyfriend, who set his pride aside to give you what you wanted.

It turned you on.

Extremely.

"So, how was your day?" You asked, happy to sit across from him, the man of your dreams, sharing takeout dinner from that Croatian restaurant that you both loved.

"It was good baby. How was yours?"

"Good, just good."

"Great." Joško chuckled, returning to the plate on his food.

It dawned on you as silence fell, that your heart was beating fast and your palms were turning clammy with sweat. A fever, first came to your mind. However, as Joško got up to clear your plates, you sat back and watched how his muscles worked when he gloved up to scrub the dishes. His biceps swelled with every movement, slowly fueling your not so romantic thoughts.

"Baby?"

Strucked by how horny you were, you shook your head in hopes of calming your filthy mind that told you to fall down onto your knees and please your man. "Yes, honey?"

"I'm gonna take a quick shower. Do you wanna watch a movie when I return?"

"Erm, sure. Yes. A movie sounds great."

"Great. Pick whatever movie you want." He winked, disappearing into the bathroom.

You fanned yourself at the thought of him naked in a shower. Without you. "God, Y/N. Get yourself together." You were acting like a timid school girl. After the arguments of last night, here you were ready to beg Joško to run you over like a locomotive.

No.

You had to remain resolute. If Joško could make tonight about romance, so could you.

While your boyfriend kept busy in the bathroom you took it upon yourself to light some candles, pop some popcorn and set up the living room for a cozy movie night.

Just as you returned from the kitchen, Joško stepped out of the bathroom, dressed in grey sweatpants and a white t-shirt, rubbing his wet hair with a towel.

"Good, you're ready." You said, setting down the bowl of popcorn.

"I am." He smiled. "Are you?"

"Me?" You followed his gaze set on your body, realizing that Joško was referring to your not so cozy clothes. "Oh, right. I'll be right back."

By the time you returned to the living room, wearing a sweater and shorts, Joško lay on the couch, legs spread and the remote weighing in his hand.

"Are you ready for a movie night?" You smiled.

Joško's arm slumped at the sight of you, his eyes wondering freely to your braless chest and your low cut shorts. By now he should have commented on how hot you looked, or how he wanted you to sit on is lap. Face, if he was feeling kinky. However, Joško said nothing, innocently beaming at you with those dark eyes. "Ready." He smiled, inviting you to join him on the couch. You did so, snuggling up to his warm body where you eventually fell asleep as Batman fought the Joker on TV.

You woke up towards the end of the movie, however, Joško's grainy voice whispering in your ear. "I hope you liked the flowers."

"Mmm. I did baby. I really did." You hymnd. "Remind me to put them in water before we go to bed."

"No need." He said, his hand slowly traveling up and down your back. "I already did it for you."

Your eyes peered open, meeting your boyfriend's loving eyes. His gentle gaze that had no desire to fuck you sensless on this very couch.

God, what have you done to your man.

"Joško?" You raised your head from his shoulder.

"Yes, baby?"

You were lost for words. He was perfect. The man of your dreams. A curly haired beast. He was perfect just the way he was, romantic or not. "I love you." You squealed.

Joško's gaze softened, his eyes searching your face. "I love you too."

"Please, fuck me." You sighed. "Hard, not gentle."

He grinned. "As you wish baby. As you..."

He didn't get to finish that sentence. You were all over his ass before he could open his mouth and utter another word.

You got flipped to lay on your back, Joško's hands roaming freely under your sweater. Your chest arched into his open palms. A loud moan escaping your mouth as Joško went to nibble your ear with a nip of his tounge, the smell of him uncovering your desire for his body, his cock, that should be deep in your mouth by now.

"Calm down baby." He chuckled roughly. "Don't you want me to take my time with you? To be gentle?"

"Fuck, no."

Joško's laughter drummed in your ear. He then lowered himself so that his head was set between your legs.

Your body stirred below him, eager for his hands to get rid of your shorts. Joško did so with the most taunting of smiles, licking his lips once he discovered that you weren't anything underneath, making this so called romance easy for him.

"Fuck Y/N, you taste amazing."

"I do?"

You watched him dip his head back between your legs, tasting you in a way that contracted every muscle in your belly. Your head fell back with the way his tounge circle your clit, playfully yet eager.

"Mmm. So fucking delicious." He groaned, his hands squeezing your ass, raising your hips towards his gaping mouth.

"God, Joško."

It was unbearable.

He was unbearable.

Unbearably romantic in his own way.

As Joško continued to drain you of your senses of the world, you came to the conclusion that romance was indeed an important part of a healthy and sustainable relationship. Your relationship, however, was fine just the way it was, with your boyfriend knowing just the right way to please you.

DON'T MISS - 10 DAYS OF REQUESTS

(DAY 1)

(DAY 2)

(DAY 3)

(DAY 4)

[sugawhaaa]

heyy girly!! saw your post and maybe thought you could do this with any member you like but maybe try like prince!member with Gardner!reader and one night the prince wants to sneak out to see the village and the reader does show the village and in the end reader takes him to this big pond that's covered in trees and you can continue the rest, smut, fluff whatever you like. Have a nice day or night! also can I be 🐝anon?..if there's someone with it that's alright!

YEONJUN X READER

🌷Red Tulip🌷

Warnings//genre:: friends to lovers, fluff, suggestive towards the end

Pairing:: prince!Yeonjun x fem!gardener!Reader

A/N:: Istg why do I feel like all my fanfic are so short these days 😭 it is what it is ig. Hope yall like it though and I hope its what you wanted 🐝

Txt masterlist:: 🌷

🎧::

Yeonjun sits by his window cill looking out into the village that he would soon rule over. He was grateful and blessed to rule such a peaceful land inhabited by such dear people, he will fight to protect them in the future. However, after spending so many days within the walls of this castle Yeonjun felt, lonesome. Like he was missing something and he could just barely reach it, it was grazing on his finger tips.

As his gaze falls from the stars and back down to the quietness of night among the village he notices movement, how rare. It was rather close to the castle as well. Perhaps it could be his dear Y/N? Yeonjun knew of this woman who lived in the village who had a radiant beauty that lured him in like a moth to a lamp. Despite Yeonjuns undeniable and uncontrollable feelings he could not show Y/N his interest for through words numerous reasons.

However now, in the dead of night, if he showed interest would anyone notice? Though it felt like a fever dream Yeonjun saw an opportunity and reached for it. He snuck out of the castle and rushed over to where Y/N lived, a little cottage surrounded by flowers and a flow of water. He went around back where Y/N spends most of her time, swinging in the love swing or gardening. To his surprise, he spotted Y/N. She gasps and turns to him.

"Prince, why are you up at this hour?" You rush over to him and he chuckles, shaking his head.

"I could ask you the same thing," he smiles sincerely as he sees that sweet innocence on your face. "I couldn't sleep and as I watched the stars out my window I couldn't help but hear a little somebody out and about as well," Yeonjun's eyes are bright despite the cold darkness surrounding the two of you.

"Well I couldn't get any work done today because I was so tired. But now that it's the middle of the night I feel more energized than ever," You chuckle softly as you tend to the array of flowers resting below your peach tree. "I haven't tended to my flowers all day so I thought I should give them some attention," You explain before rising to your feet, your night dress hanging down by your ankles. "Would you like to pick some flowers with me? There are some herbs by the pond if you're interested in those," You offer and you can see Yeonjun blush softly.

"Why not?" He chuckles before following you over to the love swing where the flower baskets sit. You hand one to Yeonjun before taking one for yourself. You make your way back over to the flowers you were tending to earlier. You help Yeonjun collect up some for his room, make it a bit more colorful him, before leading him down the path to the little pond. It was hidden behind some willow trees that reach the ground so it was unknown to most of the people, including Yeonjun. "Wow what a beautiful place," He chuckles in awe as he watches the still pond reflect the moon.

"Would you like to take some herbs home with you?" You offer but he shakes his head.

"It's alright, I wouldn't want to take any flavour from your dishes," He chuckles and though he refused he still helps you collect the herbs. You set the baskets by a nearby bench before sitting down on it. Yeonjun, who had been crouched down water the frogs swim around the pond, notices your shift in demeanor. "Is everything alright dear Y/N?" He asks as he softly walks up to you before sitting beside you.

"I worry about you Yeonjun," You explain and he looks at you surprised before smiling.

"Why would you worry? I am protected well and our country has never been safer," He explains and you nod, but you don't feel comforted yet.

"I worry about us...I suppose that better describes how I feel," You look down at your hands clasped in your lap. Yeonjun turns to you, surprise written on his face. "I'm sure you feel it to. The chemistry between us when we're around each other, the race in your heart, and that look in your eyes," You look up into his eyes, that purity and curiosity gleaming throughout them. Yeonjun looks down, sighing softly, too afraid to admit the truth. "And that flower you gave me was no coincidence was it?" You comment and you see the blush travel up his neck, tinting his ears. "A red tulip, the flower used to quietly confess love. You gave that to me as a confession because you knew I would understand your confession without you having to say it right?"

"I knew you would bring that up," He sighs before turning to you.

"Of course, how could I just ignore it?" You chuckle and he takes a deep breath.

"I wanted to tell you but I wasn't sure how. I wanted to make it meaningful and since you love flowers so much I thought that was the most fitting way," Yeonjun explains shyly, still avoiding eye contact. "I...I realized I probably don't have much time left to live like this, live as freely as I do but I needed to tell you, express my love before it's too late," He explains, his eyes darting down to your slightly parted lips. "I don't mean to rush you Y/N but..." He brings a hand to the side of your face, tucking back stray hair behind your ear. His hand then rests at your cheek, gently rubbing your tender skin with his quivering thumb.

He leans in slowly, allowing you plenty of time to pull away or back down, but it's not awkwardly slow, he was simply building the tension and allowing you a moment to consider his offer. You lean in closer, bringing your hand to the back of his head, gently intertwining your fingers in his hair. Finally your lips meet, the warmth and plumpness filling your senses with a newfound relief. His lips were soft but held a certain amount of hunger, eagerness, desire. He gently pulls you closer by your hip, your bodies nearly overlapping as the kiss shifts from tender and patient to eager and hungriful.

Yeonjun then pulls back, the cold hitting your lips once again at the separation. "I'm sorry," He looks down.

"For what?" You look at him worriedly.

"I love you too much," He chuckles softly, stroking back your hair. "I can't control myself around you, I act like a fool," He laughs to himself with a shake of his head but you lift his chin to look at you.

"If you're a fool I must be a complete moron," You laugh softly before kissing him, this time with more hunger and desperation. Your hands start roaming over each others bodies, his hand tangled in your hair and pulling you close, your hands tugging at the back of his neck, drawing him closer as your other hand rests at his chest. "So does this mean I have a boyfriend now?" You giggle between kisses, your breaths coming in short.

"If I can have a girlfriend," He chuckles as he begins to lean back, pulling you on top of him. The position the two of you were in looked rather misleading but perhaps that was the path this was taking. "You're so beautiful Y/N, you look like an angel," He comments as the moon lingers behind you, cascading your body in a faint glow. He strokes your cheek softly before kissing you one last time.

Part 2???

[flowersandskeletons526]

"We Need A Tagger" - Warriors Concept Album Fanfic (Part 4/5)

This has a lot of my personal headcanons in it so it was really fun to write! Enjoy!

Link to ao3 post at the bottom for those who prefer that

-----

The next several weeks were a blur for Rembrandt. They were also arguably the best several weeks of her life.

She was still pretty shaken after the fight on her first night. Cleon stayed true to her word and gave her two days to recover and calm her nerves. The others still had to go out on business but never all of them at once so Rembrandt never had to be alone in the house. She wasn’t sure if that was an order from Cleon or just coincidence, but she was glad for it, anyway.

She spent a lot of time with Cochise, learning basic first aid, hanging out in the kitchen talking about nothing much in particular or smoking on the stoop. Cochise let her bum cigarettes for a while before saying she needed to get her own pack, and then got an evil glint in her eye and said she had an idea that Rembrandt couldn’t tell Cleon. This led to Rembrandt putting on a sweet, innocent expression and asking the cashier at a bodega to help her get something on a high shelf. He didn’t have a clue that Cochise was behind the counter grabbing three cartons of her cigarette of choice. Cochise had proclaimed to everyone that Rembrandt was her new best friend after that. Rembrandt learned an adrenaline rush could actually feel good when serious bodily injury wasn’t on the line. 

Swan was quiet, almost as quiet as Rembrandt, and was all business ninety-nine percent of the time. She sat with Rembrandt at the kitchen table and went over a map of Coney Island, marking what they’d tagged already and what they hadn’t, circling unclaimed blocks they wanted to take, and writing a list of other gangs and their colors for Rembrandt to memorize. She divided them into three columns: allies, enemies, and neutral. She was a little colder than Cleon, a little more cynical, but she shared a bit of how she came to be a Warrior and Rembrandt understood where the attitude came from.

Rembrandt saw her warmer side in brief moments: how she looked up to Cleon, how she was there to help everyone no questions asked, and even how she interacted with Ajax. She was certain the two women hated each other at first. Watching their third wrestling match in one day, Rembrandt turned to Cleon with a question on the top of her tongue. Cleon smiled like she read her mind.

“That’s just how they show affection with each other,” she said. “I’d break it up if I actually thought it was serious.”

She was right. Rembrandt looked closer and realized they were both smiling from ear to ear. 

Cleon was somehow both incredibly comforting and incredibly intimidating at the same time. She had a presence that seemed to draw everyone in, an air of authority and kindness and strength that something deep within Rembrandt equated to the idea of finally being safe. When she spoke, everyone listened. When she smiled, you couldn’t help but smile back. 

Even after a week and a half of staying with the gang, Rembrandt still struggled to sleep. Cochise and Ajax were out on a mission. Swan was asleep in her room. Rembrandt sat on the couch with her knees pulled up to her chest, staring out the living room window. She was afraid that if she fell asleep, she might wake up back in her old apartment and find that it had all been a fever dream. She was afraid she might see a face at the window, a hand busting the lock, hearing a voice call a name she tried to forget was ever hers. Fuck, she felt like a child scared of the dark and she hated herself for it.

Cleon had come home in the early hours of the morning, before the sky lightened, and frowned when she saw Rembrandt still awake.

“I have melatonin. Swan has to take it sometimes, too,” the warlord offered. “Or some pot if you want. I don’t know if you smoke.”

“It’s not that,” Rembrandt said, her voice muffled behind her sleeves. 

Cleon didn’t say anything. She studied Rembrandt’s face, not long enough to make her uncomfortable but almost. She followed Rembrandt’s eyes to the window. Then she nodded slowly, as if deciding a conflict in her head, and sat in the armchair across from the couch.

“I’ve got second watch,” she said simply.

“Huh?”

“Go to sleep, Rembrandt. You’re safe here, I promise. I’ll prove it.”

“But weren’t you-”

“Rembrandt.” Cleon’s tone was stern but kind. She smiled. “Go to sleep.”

Rembrandt didn’t sleep for more than a few hours, but they were the most restful hours she’d had in a long time. The next day, Cleon pulled her aside, sat her down, and passed her a piece of paper and a pen. She wanted the address of Rembrandt’s old apartment. 

Rembrandt gave it but begged, “Please, please don’t do anything. I don’t want to think about that place anymore.”

“I’m not,” Cleon said softly. “I want it on record as a no-go zone. That’s all.” She reached over and squeezed Rembrandt’s hand. Rembrandt had finally gotten used to being touched enough to let her. “Rembrandt, if anyone ever, and I mean ever puts their hands on you again, you come to us and we’re going to handle it.”

Cleon didn’t have to expand on that. Rembrandt understood. She let Cleon hug her for the first time that night.

She still felt a bit strange about being the newest recruit. The idea that these women were so connected and had been through so much together already before Rembrandt even knew about them nagged at the back of her mind. She couldn’t help feeling like an interloper despite every attempt the gang made to include her in conversation, asking her opinion on business, cheering her on and praising her for the tagging work. 

Despite the fact that she was more or less attached to Ajax at the hip. 

A few weeks after she joined, Cochise came home with two announcements. The first: her friend that Cleon had been trying to recruit finally wanted to be a part of the gang. The woman had an infectious energy that seemed to uplift everyone in the apartment. Constantly laughing and smiling, constantly tossing around jokes, she was dubbed “Cowgirl” upon joining the Warriors. This was due in part to the hat she never took off and was fiercely protective over, but mostly because, according to Cochise, she could subway surf with more ease than most people could walk. 

When she wasn’t going through her levels of initiation with Cochise, she sat with Rembrandt, going on about whatever without checking to see if Rembrandt was really listening. She took an interest in Rembrandt’s drawings and offered to pose so she could practice doing portraits. Rembrandt liked her for that. 

The second announcement: Cochise was moving in with Cowgirl.

“What’s wrong with my house?” Cleon asked jokingly, although Rembrandt wasn’t entirely sure if she was only faking being offended.

“Nothing, girl!” Cochise assured. “Cowgirl’s shitty roommate moved out without notice and she’s not going to be able to pay rent if I don’t go.”

“She could come here.”

“And sleep where, on the floor? You’ve still got Rembrandt on the couch. Now she can at least share the room with Ajax.”

Ajax was sitting beside Rembrandt at the table during the discussion. She didn’t seem to have paid attention to the comment, but it made Rembrandt feel… Well, she didn’t actually know what to call it. It made her stomach flutter and her chest tighten in a way that was completely foreign to her. 

“You know you still have to come to all the meetings,” Cleon said. “And no skipping family dinners.”

“Cleon, Cleon,” Swan whispered. “It gets cornier every time you say it.” Cleon gave her a playful shove.

“We’ll be here every night, I swear. There’s a working phone in the apartment so you’ll be able to call us up whenever we’re needed.”

Cleon leaned back in her chair and drummed her fingers on the table. “Alright,” she relented. “I’m serious about the family dinners.”

“I know,” Cochise chuckled at the same time Swan groaned, “Cleon, you’re making it worse.”

Rembrandt couldn’t deny she was a little sad that Cochise wouldn’t be in the house as much anymore. Once Cochise was completely moved out and Rembrandt began to move her things into the room she would now share with Ajax, she found a carton of cigarettes under the bed with her name written on it, and a stack of clothes with a note that read, “should fit you until you can get more.”

She learned a lot about Ajax since they began sharing a room. Ajax only ever slept in a muscle tank top and basketball shorts. Ajax stole a walkman the day they were released and had it playing whenever she had a free moment because Cleon complained about how loud she turned up her stereo. Ajax started every morning with a thirty minute workout, sometimes an hour if she could push it, which meant Rembrandt had the surprise of waking up one morning to see Ajax cranking through one-handed push-ups and mouthing the words to whatever song she had in her headphones. Rembrandt turned right back over in bed and pretended to be asleep until she heard Ajax leave.

She learned Ajax had nightmares. Rembrandt woke up from hers silently, shooting upright in bed, covering her mouth so she wouldn’t wake anyone else. Ajax woke up cursing and instinctively reaching for the weapons on her nightstand. They were infrequent but savage when they happened. 

Rembrandt didn’t know what to do the first time she saw it. She’d been sitting awake from her own night terrors when Ajax exploded with a scream. She looked so small, so embarrassed to be seen like that, turning away from Rembrandt and hiding her face. Rembrandt didn’t know what to do so she sat on the edge of Ajax’s bed and waited for her to speak. 

“Cochise is a really heavy sleeper,” Ajax croaked. “Only Cleon knows. And now you, I guess.”

“It doesn’t make you seem any less tough, you know,” Rembrandt said before she really realized what was coming out of her mouth.

Ajax smirked. “You’re quite the little mind reader, huh?”

“I’m good at reading people.”

“Is that why you didn’t run? That first night, before the cops showed up?”

Rembrandt struggled to find words. “It’s why I came back. I saw you waiting by the painting every night.”

“And you didn’t think it was creepy?”

“Maybe a little,” Rembrandt said. Ajax winced. “I’m kidding.”

It got a laugh out of Ajax, and Rembrandt found herself smiling. 

Weeks later, while all the initiated Warriors were out, Rembrandt and Cowgirl were left alone in the apartment. Cowgirl was going on about some cute somebody she’d been talking to and Rembrandt had to keep reminding her to stay still so she could finish the portrait. As Rembrandt paused to take a sip of coffee, Cowgirl tilted her hat down and smiled slyly. 

“Soooo,” she sang. “You and Ajax have a thing going on, right?”

Rembrandt choked. 

“What?” she spluttered, wiping coffee off her face. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

“Well, y���know, the way you two act around each other.”

Ajax was with Rembrandt all the time. Almost the entire Warriors territory was tagged and every time Rembrandt went out to officially lay claim to another block, Ajax was there watching her six. Sometimes they went with Swan when Cleon was worried about being too close to the borders but she was never without Ajax. 

She thought of Ajax yelling at her to run when they accidentally crossed over into another gang’s territory, trying to avoid a fight. The way Ajax would help her up onto window sills and fire escapes and maybe her hands lingered on Rembrandt’s waist a little longer than was necessary. When Ajax came home bloody and bruised from a mission gone wrong, Rembrandt had become the one to bandage her split knuckles and force her to hold ice packs on the black eyes and busted lips. 

The playful jostling side hugs when they returned from a successful mission. The casual arm slung around her shoulders for just a second as they walked together. The way she could shoot Rembrandt a smirk and Rembrandt would find herself smiling back no matter what mood she was in at the time. Ajax was always so amazed by Rembrandt’s work when she snuck a peek at her sketchbook or when Rembrandt pointed out another decorated storefront that she painted. After a month of tagging, Cleon finally gave her permission to start putting up more murals within their borders. Ajax was there to cheer her on, whistling as the paintings progressed, handing Rembrandt new colors out of her backpack when she asked. 

She thought of staying up late at night when neither of them could sleep and Ajax showing her all the different cassette tapes she kept in a box under her bed. She thought of the one time Ajax let her draw her portrait, even if she kept complaining about how long she had to stay still. She thought of when a mysterious box of acrylic paints appeared on her bed so she could paint her side of the room. No one knew anything about it when she asked but she overheard Ajax telling Cleon how broke she suddenly was. 

She thought of the one time she and Ajax had fallen asleep watching TV on the couch together. She’d woken up at the break of dawn to find herself curled up against Ajax’s chest, the Warrior sleeping peacefully, one arm wrapped around Rembrandt. Rembrandt had scrambled to the other side of the couch just before Ajax woke up. Ajax never mentioned it and Rembrandt never mentioned it and whoever put the blanket over them while they slept never mentioned it either. 

“Ajax and I do not have a thing,” Rembrandt laughed hysterically. “Cleon just has her go with me when I’m tagging. She recruited me.”

“Mm-hm,” Cowgirl said. “Cochise recruited me and she’s never looked at me like that.”

She looked up from her sketchbook. “Like what?”

The door opened. Cleon, Swan, Cochise, and Ajax stepped into the apartment, talking amongst themselves. Cleon whistled sharply, and the two probationary Warriors came to join them around the table. Cowgirl’s words raced through Rembrandt’s mind as she took her place beside Ajax. Cleon placed both hands on the tabletop and leaned in. Everyone followed. 

Her expression was somber and quiet. “I have an announcement,” she said. “Rembrandt, I have a job for you. It’s one you have to do on your own.”

Rembrandt frowned, her shoulders tensing. “Okay,” she mumbled nervously.

“This will be your final initiation.”

That surprised everyone. The entire crew stared at Cleon, eyes wide, Swan and Ajax both straightening as Cowgirl looked to Cochise in confusion. Rembrandt’s stomach dropped.

Ajax was the first to speak: “What do you mean, her final initiation? She’s been tagging for weeks. That’s not initiation enough?”

“She’s marked out our whole territory,” Cochise added. “She’s expanded our territory.”

Cleon raised a hand to silence them. “She’s going to claim all of Coney Island for us. Rembrandt, you’re going to tag the Wonder Wheel.”

Rembrandt was taken aback but not entirely daunted by the request. “I can tag a car easily.”

“No. I want you to tag the logo in the center.”

The gang exploded.

“What the fuck!” Ajax screeched. “How the actual fuck can you even think of that!”

Cochise said, “That’s insane! That’s not a reasonable ask for an initiation, not after everything she’s already done for us!”

“Cleon, I can’t back you up on this,” Swan said haltingly. “That’s too dangerous.”

“I want to test her metal.” Cleon never took her eyes off Rembrandt.

“Test her metal? Test her metal?! She took on a psycho with a knife who was three times her size on her first fucking night! Is that not metal enough? This is fucking ridiculous!”

“Ajax-”

“No! No, Swan, it’s nuts and you know it is!”

Rembrandt couldn’t breathe. A heavy ball of ice grew in her gut as the conversation spiraled into a screaming match between the Warriors, everyone shouting over each other until Rembrandt couldn’t understand what was being said anymore. Her pulse hammered in her ears. Her hands balled into fists as she tried and failed to force air into her lungs. The whole time, Cleon held her stare, calm and steady, and Rembrandt prayed for a moment that this was just a test to see how she would react and she wouldn’t actually have to scale the fucking ferris wheel but she knew it wasn’t.

She looked at Ajax. The enforcer was red in the face and had veins popping out of her forehead as she hollered back and forth with Swan and… No, that couldn’t be right.

Rembrandt swore there were tears in her eyes.

“Will you be with me?”

Her voice startled everyone into silence. They all turned to her.

“Yeah, we’ll be with you,” Cleon promised, “but we can’t help you. You have to get up there, tag it, and get down by yourself.”

“What do I have to do?”

“Block out the two W’s with our tag.”

“Rembrandt, no-”

Rembrandt grabbed Ajax’s hand and took a deep breath.

“I’ll get my cans.”

------

Aaaand now you all have to suffer with me as I work through these ideas in my head. I'm already working on part five so it won't be left on a cliffhanger for too long

(also I know Cowgirl's line in her roll call is a "riding" joke but I like the headcanon that she subway surfs so I'm rolling with. However let it be known that I do NOT condone subway surfing, it is dangerous, don't do it)

[zahri-melitor]

Batman v Ra's Al Ghul, by Neal Adams: A Bronze Age fever dream of a comic, written in 2019-2021.

Neal Adams caps off his over 50 year career with DC comics by...them letting him write a book for the first time in a decade.

Now, Adams is famous for his Bronze Age artwork, not his writing, and it's deservedly so: this is not the comic you would pick up if you were interested in award winning writing. But I have to say, it's actually something far more fun than 'good writing'.

I think the easiest way to describe the incredibly wild vibes of this title are 'Adams writes a multiverse Bronze Age time travel AU fic', where the cast technically consists of a modern set of characters (Dick is Nightwing and both Tim and Damian are Robin), but all of the characters are drawn, talking and acting like they just walked off a page in 1974 or so.

For assistance, that's: Dick in the yellow with the very 70s black vest; Tim in the blue t-shirt; Damian in the red t-shirt; and Bruce in the suit. You end up keeping track of them in this title by their haircuts.

Bruce and Damian here cannot remember anything about being Batman and Robin; Dick and Tim appear to have shown up with a fantastical story that cannot be proven (as I said, this has INCREDIBLE reality hopping AU vibes).

Some of the characters have been mindwiped. Some of the characters are robot duplicates. A whole list of characters Adams helped create show up largely because he created them (seriously Kirk and Francine Langstrom show up for a couple of pages mostly to give Dick and Tim an airlift into a difficult to reach entrance to the Cave). Nobody sounds particularly in character at any point, but that's not really a problem in this comic, because what it really is is a giant jolt of Bronze Age style writing nostalgia direct to the brainstem.

They don't make comics like this anymore and reading one written in the 2020s like this reinforces why.

Deadman's brother Aaron and sister Zeea show up; his brother is busy pretending to be an alternate Australian version of Batman called Marvin O'Hearn, and his sister is a psychic running around in the most 70s outfit imaginable controlling things and mindwiping Bruce on Ra's orders.

(And yes, if you too just asked 'Boston Brand has siblings???' the answer is 'kinda sorta but definitely not these two', however given Adams was writing Boston in 1968 at one point he's got as much right as anyone else to claim there are additional siblings)

There's a group who PRETEND to be the Court of Owls but secretly are a group of industrialists called The Money who want to control the world via paying for legislators, judges and industry (and yes I realise that sounds exactly like the Court's thing, but Adams was almost 80 when he wrote this, he can have an expy Court if he wants one).

Bruce pretends to be Matches for a good chunk of the back end of this comic and it actually acknowledges that Matches Malone was a real gangster before he died and Bruce stole his identity (something other writers and the fandom often forget), because Adams wants one more spin with the character he designed.

There's also a moment in the sixth issue where one of Ra's pet scientists tries to sell a panel of Gotham execs on a perpetual motion machine based on electrolysis as his replacement for the current Gotham power generators and at this point I lost it giggling at the portrayal of Ra's as a cheap charlatan.

(There is also a sneaky joke that only works if you know what British salad cream is; there's this sequence of the kids talking about Alfred making sandwiches with 'crappy salad dressing' instead of mayonnaise, only this tray has been made with mayo...and it's a hint that Alfred has been replaced by a robot. I laughed; I suspect it might be non-obvious to American audiences)

This is not a comic to read if you are interested in 'main continuity' or 'coherence' or even 'good writing'. However if you want some wild antics that feel like someone's 3am fanfic AU written in pure Bronze Age vibes and to see the last work of one of Ra's Al Ghul's creators? Give it a chance. You'll never be able to predict what's on the next page.

[smokersbaby]

Smoker eats an aphrodisiac fruit

Request's text -> Captain Smoker gets hit by an aphrodisiac devil fruit but it takes awhile to take effect. But when it does let's just say breeding kink + degradation kink. 😩 This man has been my fever dream ever since he showed up in Loguetown. And post time skip Smoker? Now that's a fine piece of man. But yeah if I could request that for his bday and if you could leave my name out please? 👉👈

Thank you for your request! It was a bit difficult for me to write about degradation kink but I tried so I hope you enjoy it anyway even if it's not as much as you requested! This prompt was sooo good, I'm glad you requested me the aphrodisiac fruit since I've read fanfics about it but never with Smoker! This is the third and last fanfic about "Smoker's birthday event" I hope you enjoyed this little event!

Characters: Smoker TW: not proofread (hickeys, receiving oral sex, choking, praising kink, degradation kink, breeding kink, no protection used, creampie) Words count: 1,5k MINORS DNI

Gardening was a new thing to you, but you decided to give it a chance when you heard someone talking about a special fruit with an aphrodisiac effect: a strange man at the fruit and vegetables market sold you some seeds, he defined the fruit that should have grown from them having an "aphrodisiac" effect, so you decided to give those seeds a try. It's not like you and Smoker needed a boost on intimate moments, not at all, but you wanted to see if what you were told was true about this kind of fruit. One day, eventually, after weeks of cures towards the little plants, the fruits were grown and ready to be eaten: they looked like tomatoes, with a red and yellow fuzzy peel, and they seemed kinda juicy tough. The moment to harvest them had finally come. As you bring the fruits into the kitchen, you spot Smoker sitting at the dinner table, reading the marine's report. He greets you with a head movement, eyes fixed on the paper and mind concentrated on the daily news. You lean towards the sink to wash away the dirt from the fruits and to make them ready to eat. Little blueish leaves were still attached to the stem of the plant, you separate the fruits from it as you throw away the unedible parts. "What's that, love?" he asks you suddenly. You turn towards him, his brown eyes were now full of curiosity and fixed on you and the fuzzy fruits you were holding in your hands. Useless to say that you didn't want him to know what the effect of the fruit was, since you didn't want to conditionate his behaviour or to give him a chance to refuse to eat one. "It's a new kind of tomato I've found at the market, do you want to taste one?" you reply while handing him one fruit. "Sure…" he grabs one and starts squeezing it a little "It's softer than an actual tomato" Smoker seems quite hesitant but eventually bites it. You didn't waste a second to ask him how it tasted and if he was feeling different from the habit. His gaze showed a little bit of concern as you say so. "It's like an ordinary tomato. W-why should I feel different?" he questions. "No, it's nothing…" your face shows a bit of disappointment. Smoker grabs his marine's papers and starts reading again as if nothing happened. Maybe it needed more time to have its effect on him…? You decided to wait a little bit longer, staying in the kitchen and minding your own business, but controlling his behaviour changes now and then. He manages also to eat the whole fruit but after twenty… thirty minutes you notice nothing different about him. You lose all your hopes as an hour pass. Probably it was just a bizarre but normal fruit without any kind of power. And you got scammed: you've paid a lot for that seeds. The fruits you cleaned were still in the sink, you were red with anger and decided to throw them away in the garbage. You pick up all the fruits and bend over to the trash ready to throw out them. But something suddenly stops you from doing that. Your head turns slightly as you feel something grabbing your waist while you were bent over the can. Smoker was standing right behind you, his large hands on the dips of your waist and his hips rubbing against your butt. "S-Smoker…" you try to say, but he puts two of his fingers in your mouth to let you wet them.

This is happening so fast that you can't help but follow every move of his and satisfy his desires. Your tongue whirls around his two fingers, he pulls them out a second later just to stick his hand in your pants, pumping two fingers inside your core without hesitation as you are still completely dressed. A growling moan escapes your mouth, now you can feel his bulge against your butt as he fucks you with his thick fingers. "What did you do to me, love?" he whispers in your ear, his deep voice sending shivers of excitement all along your body. There's no need to reply to him since he acts so fast pulling down your trousers and panties and making you lay face down on the cold kitchen counter, your waist bent perfectly at his hips height. His face is now at your butt's height, Smoker wastes no time and starts eating you out while pounding again his fingers deep inside of you. His tongue manages to caress your slit so heavenly as if he's starving to make you cum all over his face. "You taste so good" he moans against your core as he sucks your cunt with his lips and tongue. His fingers curl inside of you reaching spots you never know you had and that makes you archer your back, losing your mind in pleasure. He pulls away from you for barely a second as you hear him unbelt his trousers and trowing every clothes he had on the ground. The tip of his cock rubs against your dripping slit, he places his hands over your waist and leans closer to you to whisper something in your ear. "Now, be a good girl and take it all for me" he sounds like he's praising you. In just one move Smoker trusts his thick cock inside your cunt, making it stretch heavenly to let him fuck you just as he desires.

You can't help but moan as you feel his length buried so deep inside of you, your gummy walls clenching around his cock as if you are begging for more. He feels how much you desire him at that moment. "My little slut��� begging for my cock" he whispers with a grin on his face. Your eyes widen as you hear Smoker saying that, he has never said those things to you, the fruit affected him for sure. Hearing him saying such smutty things to you makes your body tremble in excitement, tough. You never expected to like such things. He grabs your butt and spanks it a little while trusting his length so slow and deep that makes you want to move your hips against his to let him fuck you faster. "You want more my little slut? Do you want me to breed you?" he says almost chuckling feeling you move your butt to feel him more. You can't say anything but moan in agreement, you'd let Smoker do anything as he's so wild right now. He leans his face closer to yours, you turn your head slightly thinking he's about to kiss you, but his lips start to lick and bite your neck to let you know how involved he is. His hand grabs softly your neck to choke you just right: that thing made you feel more excited than ever. His trusts become faster and faster, the tip of his cock hitting your cervix as if he wants to breed you with the biggest load he has. But Smoker is not selfish, even though he has lost his mind and has become like a wild animal due to the aphrodisiac fruit. His other hand goes down between your legs and starts to rub your clit in a circular motion while continuing to pound his thick cock as deep as he can. His breath becomes heavier, and you feel it against your neck since he won't stop biting it as he claims you as his. "S-smoker… I can't hold it anymore" you whisper to him as if you are praying for him not to hold back. "Beg for it," he says mercilessly with a grin, telling you to ask him what you want. "I beg you, Smoker, breed me" you beg him with a lewd voice. The way you asked him made something snap in Smoker's head, as he pulls you closer to him trusting his cock inside of your cunt without taking a breath and continuing rubbing your clit, ready to fill you up whole. You can't resist anymore, the way he touches you and fucks you so heavenly made your orgasm approach so suddenly that you almost didn't have time to tell him. Your moans and the way your gummy walls clenched around his length spoke for you, Smoker feels that you are cumming all over his cock and can't hold back his climax too. "Let me breed you now…" he growls against your ear as he releases probably the biggest load in his whole life inside of you. There's so much of it that starts leaking from the sides even without pulling out his cock. You can feel him pant after cumming inside of you. "Good girl… such a good girl" he whispers as he's still buried deep inside of you. You turn your head slightly to give him a wet kiss. After a couple of minutes of making out so sweetly, you try to move away thinking that moment was over. "Where are you going? I'm not done breeding you yet" he says with a deep voice pulling you closer to him, his cock has become hard-rock again. Smoker is ready to fuck the life out of you one more time. The effects of the aphrodisiac fruit would have lasted a long time.

[sharonisthebettercarter]

billy butcher and addiction--

felt there's a need for a good and proper analysis for this fucker (as well as i can manage, maybe throw in a bit of a rant on poor fandom etiquette, 'three laws of fandom' are an oldie but a goodie lol) so here we go i guess--

i wanna start by saying this is a full scope character deep dive (sortaish?? best i can do take it or leave it--lol i might go further in depth on specific scenes or whatnot later, i'm longwinded but i'm tryin' to condense as best i can for this, aaaaaaaaaaand long long post ahead--) that def includes elements solidly confirmed in dear becky and probably leans more on comics billy overall, but def does intertwine and interlock with show billy (as they are essentially the same, garth ennis' own words went something like 'he's a perfect billy butcher' lol)

i'll try to avoid spoilers (??) for the most part like dear becky, but there are some things that may need more context (there is quite a bit of in the show that works well enough to represent anyway but i guess we'll see how this goes, i may end up talking more about the show elements and how they parallel with comics billy anyway)

i also think it's worth mentioning that there's a lot to billy (especially in the comic) i feel fandom either ignores, dismisses or doesn't want to acknowledge, or just doesn't notice.

whether from personal bias/prejudice, desire (fitting billy into that 'alpha's alpha' toxic masculinity 'dom top' fever dream 'mold' so to speak, probably--no, definitely the *worst* way to interpret and easiest way bungle up his character, it completely misses the fact that billy has built *that* 'daddy approved' version of himself as a *facade* to *hide* his own shame and insecurity, and he is *so* much more complex than that nonsense (and genuinely uncomfortable and unhappy being that way-beyond the subtle guilt of a constant high). can we talk about the ways in which fandoms promote and perpetuate toxic masculinity--what, no time we'll be here all week?? oh, okay. jesus fucking christ that is exactly as bad if not worse than the maga chud interpretation and unironic worship of homelander--), lack of personal experience/familiarity, understanding--fuck it, even lack of education in media analysis or reading comprehension (if not both), and *especially* being pro-censorship/americentric/*stuck* with purity culture blinders (or even some part of them lingering)

all of those can def make media (and characters like billy) that isn't 'cookie cutter america-approved' fairly difficult to understand or accept (i guess??)

i've seen so much listed to hell and back in attempts to describe comics billy. 'he's a piece of shit' *YES*. 'he's just wish fulfillment for the author's hatred of superheroes' *no*??? let me not get into the complete hypocrisy of someone who writes or enjoys fanfic--the epitome of *wish fulfilment*--unironically complaining about other authors doing this and thinking it's a legit complaint. how does *anyone* read the entire story and come to *that* conclusion???

did you even bother reading the comic? no, i don't mean glossing over it with a completely closed mind while actively ignoring and dismissing everything important put in front of you and designed to make you think because the blood and guts or other is too distracting apparently, i mean *actually* reading it thoroughly and making an effort to think about what's being presented and why, waiting for the drop *instead* of jumping to judge (as is the american way)

and to some degree, i get it. i wouldn't say this comic is the easiest to digest (especially if completely unfamiliar with many of the themes presented, even the show has sparked some ass takes and interpretations) there's also plenty of common misconceptions, one in particular about garth ennis 'hating' superheroes. this is actually not true, what he hates is how the superhero *genre* has bottlenecked the comics industry and what is more likely to see success in it (and as a fellow creative, i completely understand how frustrating that would be, his main interest is actually war stories)

it's def one thing to say, 'nah, i don't vibe with the style' or 'it's not really for me/my taste but it's fine if others like it', i get that, satire and horror aren't for everyone. honest critique is fair even.

but it is a whole 'nother thing entirely to pretend your own personal tastes are *the only 'correct' creative law* and then *vehemently* oppose or hate something an artist created and denounce, harass, or fuck--dehumanize the people who enjoy it, if not the artists who work(ed) on it.

i'm sorry, this is a tangent cause it's def not limited to the hate the boys comics or ennis gets *at all*, it's especially prevalent in *literal* kids media like teen titans go where the thing in question is simply put--*NOT MADE FOR THE SHITHEADS NONSTOP COMPLAINING ABOUT IT* when they can literally, *LITERALLY* just *accept* that they weren't the *target audience* and move the fuck on with their day, happy as can be. *instead* of shitting on something *or the people who like it* to make literal *children* or other people feel bad about liking it.

it's one thing to try and educate people or have discourse and discussion, it is another entirely to *bully* them over something so *stupid* as *fiction*.

i especially have a problem with this shit when i have *several* artists tell me that they don't feel *safe* or *welcome* being themselves, liking or creating what *they* want to make in a fandom *because* of the fandom attitude and normalization of *hate* within that fandom.

i *thought* fandoms were supposed to be about *love* so what the fuck is this human tribalist false dichotomy bullshit??

and of course, that's not always the case. there is also an unbelievable level of respect that is given to fanartists and fanfiction writers, and that is *beautiful*. 'don't like, don't read'. *PERFECT*. curate your own content, complain or rant in your own spaces--you're entitled to an opinion, but *accept* that it still has a right to exist and other people still have a right to love it (and aren't wrong for that, opinions cannot be objective), *even if you don't like it*. just don't engage then, it's that simple.

now extend that level of courtesy to the people, artists and writers in the industry.

no, i'm not trying to shut down criticism of media, proper critique is how we learn and grow and understand better and in turn *create* better. yes, they can fumble the fucking bag too, especially when adapting something from a source material and--like *some* fanfic writers out there--think they can do it 'way better'.

but the people in the industry? who bend over backwards, going on strike in some cases, breaking their necks to work on and create the things that we *love* and latch onto?

they're people too. and whether the thing they make goes *exactly* how we want or not, however you feel about the money in the entertainment industry (which they see barely a dime of if those fucking strikes and constant mistreatment are any indication), they don't deserve to be treated like scabs.

that mentality of 'not my personal taste = universally bad' and 'anyone who disagrees with my opinion is wrong' is fucking gross and *extremely elitist*, just straight up announcing how pretentious, obtuse, willfully arrogant and ignorant, and *lacking in self awareness*--the number one easiest way to be the *shittiest* kind of artist/writer/critic--you are. it is *exactly* like cishet white men complaining about something being 'bad' because it's 'woke' or has anything *besides* a cishet white man for the protagonist.

*god forbid something isn't tailor made specifically for them.*

swear to gawd, i got a list of different bullshit and circle jerking i've seen all across different fandoms for different reasons. no i'm not mad at any one person in particular, just a little salty from recurring problems and gatekeeping (ghoulfucking-GHOULFUCKING OF ALL THINGS I--I CANNOT) if not straight up bullying (does it really make a bitch feel *so* much better to try and hurt other people for liking what they, and let's be honest, are not willing to give the time of day?) in fandoms. (the complete audacity of people to complain about a media being 'childish' or 'bad' because 'insert nonsensical trivial bullshit here that holds no weight because it's personal taste if not flat out wrong and not actual critique' and then turn around and throw the biggest fucking tantrums about it--let me not get into the whole sharon carter debacle jesus christ--)

same shit. different pile.

also, fuck me. i keep *forgetting* that genuinely valid critique (*not* personal taste/opinion, proper critique pertains to things like techniques used, composition, narrative consistency and plot holes, goals of the artist/writer, accomplishments of those goals, etc.) is something that needs proper education and understanding all on its own which not a whole ton of people get or even know, which just goes to show--i'm a dumbass too. (but i won't deny that plenty of 'critics' are full of shit and *know* this but use their 'personal taste' as 'critique' *anyway* because... they enjoy being complete assholes and discouraging other artists i guess.)

y'all, take a class or two in art critique and literature analysis. you'll learn all the cool lingo (to later forget if you're like me~), and maybe (hopefully) walk out with a bit more of an open mind wanting to encourage more art in the world, even if you don't personally like it. take a moment to *listen* to differing opinions in their *entirety* and you might even gain a new perspective.

*no one* should be ashamed to ask questions or admit they don't know or understand something and fuck the people that would make you feel that way. *we can and should help each other.*

but stagnant or hostile fandoms with no self awareness and perpetuated elitism circle jerks? *really* fucking shameful, regardless of the form or where they are.

ANYWHO--

ugh, fuck. okay. i think i'm done with that tangent, back on topic--

BILLY BEAN~<3

and i want to reiterate that *again*, dear becky *does* confirm pretty much everything i'm going to discuss here tho technically speaking, nothing is spoiled here as it's just reiterating what is implicit (if not stated outright) throughout the series.

as far as dear becky goes, it's a good final gut-wrenching piece to the series and i loved it, but it definitely leaned on more of 'tell' instead of 'show, don't tell' (no duh in context, but probably because the rest of the comic did the 'show'--very well imo but it still flew over peoples' heads and made them misplace their brains--i'm sorry, i've just lost so much patience for the lack of reading comprehension and media literacy, but honestly? ennis is genuinely too good at knowing how to spark a strong emotional reaction in readers. and can we talk about the dense mofos that *make* authors have to 'tell' just to confirm something that is heavily implied--what, no time? oh, fuck, fine.)

OKAY--

addiction.

what about it, and why am i mentioning it. well. because if it's not clear by now, william butcher is an addict.

and it is one of, if not the core element that drives him to do what he does.

not becky or becca. not justice.

addiction.

and i don't mean traditional substance abuse (though he admits there has been as much in his life, especially with alcohol, his drug of choice is a bit more complex and maybe not so easy to spot on the surface for those unfamiliar with addiction).

in the show, we even see him mention that he's 'done 'em all' and there's *nothing* like temp v--and it's because temp v *amplifies* his *addiction* to the highest level it could exist on.

something else to note, there's a ton of stigma and widespread (ableist) misconception surrounding addiction still (which may be part of why people may not want to recognize it in billy), but it is absolutely a clinical mental disorder and people who suffer from it should be treated as *medical patients*, not reduced to violent criminals and scumbags. (fuck you drug war and prohibition, you are the root of organized crime and you're racist as shit.) it's also possible to become addicted to *anything*. and i mean *anything*.

if you can repeat a behavior and your brain no longer cares whether or not that behavior is causing you harm because there is a *compulsive* urge for that *repetition* or a specific result from it? that is addiction. money, anger, pain, violence, self harm, attention, love...

you'd think the last one might be okay, but it's not. it's an easy way to get caught in the infinite loop of an abusive relationship, just with promise of it. no delivery necessary.

but it doesn't have to be drugs that cause addiction. hell, gambling addiction is a thing all it's own that can get *incredibly* severe.

and listen, too much of *anything* can be horrible for you. fucking coconut will give you the runs if you eat too much that shit is *not* fun pun intended--

i digress.

in billy's case? he's actually addicted to two i just listed.

violence. and self harm.

i mentioned before that what drives billy has next to nothing to do with what happened to becky or becca.

there's a common misconception that, at the end of the day, billy does have some level of good intent behind his actions, and to a degree this is true in the *complete reverse* of what people often assume, and this is proven repeatedly in both the show (with just what we have seen) and comic (where its laid out too heavily to ignore).

setting aside the fact that there's *never* a good 'rEaSoN' to commit or even attempt *genocide* (EVER. i have ZERO patience for the constant apologism of this bullshit, SWEAR TO GAWD FANDUMB--) and billy's genocidal tendencies on their own, the idea that 'he goes after homelander for becca' or 'justice' has been completely debunked.

'justice is not vengeance'

something to always keep in mind.

but... in the first season? hughie called him out on this.

butcher calls him a 'disgrace to robin's memory', and hughie--bless his little heart, responds with 'i think i'm doing this *for* her.'

it's an interesting response, because hughie is essentially saying--

'you'll *die* for this woman, but that's not what she would have wanted. i'm going to *live* for robin, and for *annie*, because *that's* what she would have wanted.'

and he's absolutely right. billy loved becca, would have died for her. but he refuses to listen and *live* for her.

the group therapist too even before hughie. she literally laid it all out, front and center in the clearest way possible, 'it's a defense mechanism', and then butcher had his little meltdown just before telling hughie about becca, everything he can, including *using* other peoples tragedies and his own *specifically* to manipulate hughie and try and make sure *starlight* can't *save* him from what butcher is trying to turn him into.

*so that hughie stays stuck on his reason to die, instead of finding one to live.*

in the second season, *becca* herself calls him out on this, multiple times.

'you put me on this pedestal but i never knew how to save you'.

'--i didn't come to you, i went to vought--.'

and that's just it, becca (and becky in the comic) is *intimately* familiar with billy's *addiction* and the underlying mental health issues he *wouldn't address*. she didn't tell him what happened even after the shock of it because she *knew* that it would just become a reason for billy to *give in* and be his worst self to a degree where she would *lose him* regardless of what she felt or asked for from him.

she felt she had to *suffer in silence* to *protect him* from *himself*, something that ends up *destroying* her.

becca wanted to *save* billy, but more importantly, she wanted *him* to *save himself* because she *believed in him*, *so much*.

'i never wanted that for you.'

she doesn't want billy to drown and suffer or cause harm in his own hatred and addictions. she *loved* him so much so, that she was willing to *drown herself* if it meant she could save *him*. she loved him *too much*.

billy's mum too, even tries to help in her own way. (she is much less aware of billy's activity in the comic, but we'll come back to her. for the show, this was likely in response to seeing the news about *stillwell*, something his dad fucking *praised* him for)

'--that he wouldn't have this hold on you--'

billy's actions are almost entirely driven by the *addiction* his father forced on him. on doing the things that would make his 'daddy' *proud*. and the thing is, he's *fully aware* of this.

he constantly *says* that *becca* is his 'reason', that she was his *cure*, but she's the *excuse*. his *new addiction* and *self medication* (also billy, you fucking cunt you *know* what you do and have no leg to stand on when it comes to self medicating--)

both in the worst of what he does and his rejection of addressing his own traumas, and she is *unwilling* in this endeavor. she never wanted this hate to consume him, she never wanted all of this death with her name as the signature, *she never wanted billy to be his father*, much less be something much worse.

he even admits as much in the third season when he hallucinates lenny who tells him his actions would 'break becca's heart'

billy responds something along the lines of 'becca's dead, it doesn't matter what she thinks'. (a line presented in the comic even more harshly, but it drives the point home perfectly.)

when he sees lenny again in his nightmare--

'i'm not that bastard--.'

'come off it billy, you always have been. cause anyone who's ever loved you, you end up gettin' 'em killed, don't ya--.'

'--the last person on god's green earth tryin' to stop you from bein' a monster, and what do you do? drag him down to your level... when he dies... and he will... then no can stop you.'

OOF OUCH OWIE--. the lenny stuff hits so damn hard but it represents *perfectly* what butcher's own *internalized beliefs* are.

mallory calls him out on it literally every season.

'--but billy! not the others!'

'it's like asking a cockroach to not be a cockroach--'

'--because it wouldn't stop with just homelander--'

'this was never about ryan or becca, it was always selfish. the hate inside that you want to let loose on the world.'

'--i was wrong... you are your father, always have been...'

and then there's billy's subsequent impulsive reaction to push ryan away, and *be his father*.

but hell, even in gen v when mallory is speaking to shetty.

and truthfully, billy was even showing *withdrawal* symptoms at the beginning of the third season.

billy himself, even *self punishes*, picking fights he knows he *won't* win as a way to counterbalance *and* satisfy his own addiction, infinite loop. vicious cycle.. (ooh i will def be coming back to the big one here--), and we see this in one *HUGE* way, and in many many smaller ways, but even in the more literal sense of going to bars, starting trouble, and laughing or smiling when he's getting beat the fuck up or *losing*.

it's even highlighted in the show, billy *seeking out violence* and conflict whether he should or not, *especially* when unnecessary. getting his own face busted up and smiling because of it is something that happens multiple times in the comic (even on accident in one instance), and is def given a place in the show. it's easy to pass off as billy simply being a masochist (which is def true lmao he does admit as much), but there's also more to it than that and it goes hand in hand with his *addiction* and--

what he thinks he deserves.

billy *hates himself* so *severely* that he actually *does not believe* that he is capable of the *good* that others, such as lenny, becca, his mum, and hughie are willing to *see* in him. he *completely* believes it when others say that 'he is his father' (internalizes it, struggles with it, and frequently acts on it).

he puts on a show. bravado, posture, and 'confidence'. and he's so good at putting on that front, that he can fool himself, even for a moment. and those that believe it will even *enable* him. and the people he feels *nothing* for? again, he maintains the front. he lives his life *masking*, *faking it*--so fucking hard. homelander could never--

and it's not even necessarily the result of toxic masculinity. don't get me wrong, he def has some issues with that lingering (y'all, if you have *say* you're an 'alpha' and posture out your sweet little ass off 24/7, you're def *not* an 'alpha' lmfao), but it's more so his own *trauma* that forces him to *cling* to that.

but when he *loves*, and he loves *deeply*, he completely rolls over and shows his belly like a kitten<3... when he was with becky, he was happy and comfortable, and all of that *ridiculousness* just melted away completely... he didn't feel any need for it because he felt *safe*, because this constant *insecurity* and feeling of being *threatened* all the damn time looming overhead had suddenly cleared up with becky there.

it's not even so much that billy doesn't feel fear. he might not traditionally (at all if his amygdala is damaged), but considering the fight or flight response, billy's *default* setting literally *is* that *fight* response. he's the way he is because he is *always* afraid and he's been conditioned for it to manifest itself as *rage*.

we see bits of his love come through in a few moments he has with people he has genuine care for. (the way he loves his mum and she instantly calms him down is genuinely so sweet.)

but it's always gonna come back down to 'daddy dearest'.

because of him, *billy is afraid of living*.

and--

his father. *is proud of him*.

billy is *just like him* or *everything he wanted to be* as a *man*, or at least is compelled to *project* this on the surface. and everything in *billy* that *is* his father, *just like him*, is *everything* that billy *hates*. so it manifests into an *intense* self loathing and spiraled addiction that magnifies the worst of what his father *forced* on him.

he *doesn't want* to be *his father*, but he feels, and fully believes that *he already is*. his self hatred is another form of *hating his father*, because *he is that man's legacy*.

so *billy* doesn't *believe* that he deserves love or goodness or care from other people (a parallel we see in homelander, presented a bit differently.) so he 'doesn't care'. makes excuses to not care (about people in general, if not just the very *prominent* antisocial tendencies), or leave, or push them away, lashing out to give *them* the excuse to leave him, because he is *afraid* and in his own mind, *unworthy*.

he's *afraid* of being loved, of *losing* that love, of *hurting* those he loves. he is *afraid* of being his own father.

but it's all he's ever known, all he's ever been *conditioned* to be. intoxicated, ever present, it's this terrible thing that destroys him but he *can't* stop. *addiction*.

and what better way to protect those he loves than to keep himself as *far* away from them as possible? than to *make* them hate him. than to do the *wrong* thing, to *disappoint* them. self sabotage. self punishment.

he can't stop himself. he deserves it.

lather, rinse, repeat.

so what does that mean for homelander, or even the reason he goes after homelander? the *real* reason.

'there must be *some* good in him because homelander 'must be' this 'ultimate evil that *must* be stopped', right?

not really. he's a symptom of a much greater evil, but he was never the root of it. if billy really wanted to solve the problems at hand and get *justice*, he'd go after *vought*, NOT homelander.

homelander is not even the real villain in *billy's* mind, in all actuality.

what homelander *is*?

temptation.

he is... the *ultimate* final high for billy. in terms of addiction to both *violence* and *self punishment*.

he doesn't actually go after homelander because he wants to 'stop him' or even kill him. not really. there are times billy starts a fight *expecting* to *lose*, *wanting* it. homelander *is* one of those times to the most intense degree that billy could find. and he even senses this when they first meet--unnecessarily, privately insulting the man because why?

because he feels *threatened*. because he feels *insecure*. because if homelander is *truly good*, even with *all that power*--

then billy has no fucking excuse--

it is, in essence, the same exact reaction that lex luthor has to superman. forcing himself to *challenge* him because of a *constant* sense of *fear*. (except lex *is* afraid of dying, so 1000% a huge coward lmao--)

but~, when he finds out homelander is *bad*?

homelander is billy's *failsafe*

to stop the person he feels is the most terrible evil of all *and* to set the world on fire in the process. a way for billy to kill two birds with one stone. compelled by his addiction to *chase* this ideation relentlessly.

homelander is to billy--his ultimate end, self punishment, a death wish, a *suicide attempt*.

and a way to *unleash his hatred onto the rest of the world*, *to make it burn*, even after his death. (this would be why despite many many MANY warnings to *not* push homelander *because of the catastrophe this will ultimately instigate and the loss of life this is bound to result in*--billy does not give a shit about the potential consequences. he welcomes them--)

if homelander were a *nuke*, billy would want to *launch* him. right now, homie is more like the *demon core*, incredibly dangerous and in some instances lethal, but not *yet* explosive.

billy *wants* the *warhead*.

it was why he got *so excited* at the *chance* of homelander offering him 'scorched earth'.

the man read billy like an open fucking book, and set the bait--

y'all, in other words, homie straight up went to billy's house and offered *crack* to the *crack addict*--fuck yeah he's gonna take that offer!

homelander never actually perceives billy as a real threat *at all* (safe to say, this is the main reason he doesn't kill him. there's a bit of personal complex combined with the deals/blackmail/request involved, but this would also be why he doesn't *hesitate* to 'kill' billy at herogasm. he genuinely gives no fucks about this poor man or his many anal complexes and daddy issues beyond the mild entertainment he gets from him and just how *easy* it is to read billy or rile him up. maybe a *dash* of novelty being found in billy's obsession with him. i'll go into the homie side of things in depth maybe someday soon lol but for now--)

and here's the thing, homelander isn't the *only* failsafe. he is simply the *ultimate failsafe*

included in all the possible bad habits billy has is pawning off his *responsibility* and personal accountability, even his *will to do good* onto others.

i mentioned before that becca (becky) was like a new addiction for him. and she was. in a sense, billy was using her to self medicate. she loved him, gave him love and made him feel good, no pain, no shame--but also no pause to think about that pain, self hatred and self doubt and actively address it. she was a way to not worry about his own *goodness* because she was an *easy* reason for him to *want* to be good.

and something important to note?

billy feels that he has *cheated* on becca/becky *since* the day she left/died. (there's a whole ass deliciously intricate story there but i'm trying to avoid the spoilers lmao. kind of a freebie hint i guess.)

lenny and hughie similarly make an effort to *hold butcher back* and reach out to him. (everyone does honestly, but not everyone is so successful with it). and butcher lets them, but *also* removes the agency of his own choice in the matter.

he doesn't just *let them* make him *good*, he doesn't believe he's capable of stopping himself on his own--but he believes in *them* because they *are* good, *truly good*.

hughie all on his own is *another kind of failsafe* and lo and behold, even calls butcher out on this by the end of the third season (theme is prevalent in the comic a lil different but again spoilers lol):

'i don't think you want to do this. i think you want me to stop you.'

*ding*ding*ding*!

nail on the head, hughie... butcher does not believe he can stop himself. so he sets up *failsafes* to do as much.

and let me just say, it is *unbelievably* shitty of him to do that, to pawn off the responsibility of his own behavior, whether good or pure evil onto other people. but i get it. and it fucking breaks my heart for him.

because *that* is addiction. it feels like mind control. aggressive compulsion. you feel ashamed, and hate yourself, and don't care if you hurt yourself or even others. but you keep *hoping*, *wishing*, *leaving a breadcrumb trail* so that *someone*, *anyone*, will come along and--

*save you. from you.*

and when you stop believing in yourself, in your own willpower to fight against this *thing* that just completely *destroys* you from the inside out... without *anyone* on your side, what else is left to do but to numb the pain?

i was able to recognize billy's addiction right off the bat because i've *been* to a lot of the places he has been. including the addiction. and he makes me so *fucking* mad because it's like seeing a version of myself *still stuck*, *still lost*, *still trapped* by my own issues and self loathing, and all of the abuse i've gone through--

and the biggest fuck up, the biggest *abuser* is me.

i can't *escape* me. *no one* can escape *themself*.

that fucker breaks my heart to pieces because *i have been there*, and i know just how fucking hard it is to *be* there, just how much harder it is to *get out* and start to *learn*--*who is it you really wanna be? who are you without this drug?*

and something he even says in the comics on a few occasions is--

'i'm not really here, i'm somewhere else watching this happen'

asserting that he *truly* believes that he has *no control* over *what* he is. (in contrast with homelander, who feels the weight of something similar but more literally in some regard, and in relation to so many other aspects in his life with the world around him.)

billy butcher *is* the *true villain* of *his own story*

of his own making.

he's not after homelander or even vought. he doesn't blame society or even his father at this point. he blames himself. and he's *given up* entirely on fighting himself. he's looking for his *overdose*.

*that's homelander*

ain't that a kick in the head...

it's part of what makes their relationship and dynamic so incredibly electric and titillating. it's got nothing to do with becca or becky.

butcher sees homelander as an easy way out. as a way to control the narrative, *maintain his own*, and *stop the bad guy* without bringing someone *good*, like *hughie*, down to his level.

he *sees* the parallels, a kindred spirit. he *knows* the potential. and he wants to be the *spark* to light all that *gasoline*.

because then it won't be his fault anymore. his *guilt*. he'll have passed on his *curse*.

likewise, he actually goes after supes in general for a similar enough reason, and it ties in with why he *doesn't* go after vought directly.

billy actually *likes* the status quo. to a degree, *needs* it, *needs vought*

because *vought* is the *creator* of his *supply*, feeding this addiction. and we hear billy say this in both the comic and show--

'with great power comes the absolute certainty that you'll turn into a right cunt.'

and billy actually believes this--about himself.

when he says it about other supes and even his intense hatred of them, it is a *projection* of his own issues and what he believes to be true for himself (that he would do the absolute worst thing imaginable given the opportunity). and in a way, going after them is in some ways a metaphor for stopping and destroying himself, hating himself, as much as it is a way to maintain his addiction.

and--

maintain the narrative he has built--that he is the true villain.

and if that's the case, well... it takes a *hero* to stop a *villain*, right?

but also--y'all remember that scene in the suicide squad where polkadot man imagines everyone as his mum? how he imagines starro as his mum?

yeah, that.

that's basically billy. every fucking supe, including starlight, and kimiko, and let's *really* not talk about what this means about him sleeping with maeve in context with his 'supe=daddy' issues, but even the person he sees in the mirror. *all of them* are *his father*.

listen, i'm not kidding. billy's daddy issues are seriously severe, so fucking bad, i--

his actions aren't for becca or becky or ryan or justice. even he *knows* that's bullshit and admits as much (which just makes fandom denying it that much more fucked). but they're not even *just because* or because he's genocidal, antisocial, or anything else. he *does* want someone to stop him. he's sane enough to recognize his actions for what they truly are *behind* the mask.

billy's actions are a volatile and violent *cry for help*, because he never learned how to *ask*, or even how to *believe in himself*.

he never truly learned that *he never had to be his father*, and he didn't *need* becky or becca, lenny or hughie to *be good*.

i actually think billy's greatest magic trick is convincing even the audience and readers that he is a *total*, complete piece of shit. and don't get me wrong, he is *def* a huge, massive, incredibly rank and ripe piece of shit--.

and y'all, i'm sorry if you believed him and got played like a damn fiddle, him and homie def throwin' in some hard balls--

but he's also still human. he also still needs just as much if, honestly? maybe even more, fucking *help* than homelander. which kind of draws back into their parallels. the tomfoolery of fandom might have you believe that billy is less complex or more put together than homelander, but their situations go hand in hand and the evidence suggests (if not confirms) something quite different.

billy's plight and even goal in some sense is *convincing the rest of his world that he is a monster*. driven by the addiction his father gave him. enabled by the world around him.

homelander's? it's actually the complete opposite. his struggle is with *his world convincing him that he is a monster*, and in turn, against his own instincts, *growing* into that role. when in reality, he never got the chance to decide for himself, it was decided *for* him a long long time ago.

'i think, therefore i am.'

'i can, therefore i must.'

however, *our actions cannot define who we are, because we can choose our actions*. good or bad are not something you inherently *are*, they are something you *choose to do*.

it paints what in turn becomes quite the brutal and tragic picture when these two forces meet. homelander and billy are both of the mindset that they *don't have a choice*.

and this bit is a bit more of a personal thought, but regarding billy's mum, she was *becky*. she was sweet, and kind, and cared for her family more than anything. *it didn't matter what she suffered, she was willing to drown if it meant saving the people she loved*.

as much as i adore how cute becca and billy were, i don't think she would have saved him.

i think the implication is that she would have either 'drowned' trying and become his mum, history repeating itself in a vicious cycle as billy spread his disease to any child they could have.

or that she would have lost her mind. and in turn *become* the person billy spread his disease to, if not another enabler for him. if not billy's choice of drug, maybe she would have taken up something else and eventually overdosed. i would even say the show implies this outcome with both becca and hughie, as the more butcher pushes--the more worn down they get.

if you put enough pressure on someone--they break.

becca was *good* for him. but billy was so, so fucking *bad* for her.

it begs the question of whether or not billy *is* right, if he really is this monster, *fated* to become his father in the worse of ways. of whether or not it's too late for him.

he's certainly not 'normal' or 'right' or 'good' or even an 'anti-hero'. at best, you could maybe call him an 'anti-villain', he is meant to be the deuterantagonist.

it def doesn't help that every time he has the *chance* to do the right thing, *someone* goes and enables him, gives him a reason to do the *wrong* thing.

fucking maeve in that last episode of the third season. but she's def not the only one, and def not the only time. (and yes, if it wasn't clear enough, being completely fucking indifferent to killing *thousands* of people to go after *one* fucking guy is in fact, the *wrong* thing to do.)

butt.

rewatching the scenes with lenny and billy's reaction, and even the final fight, showed something of a *possible* silver lining.

billy *enjoys* rejecting his father. actually pretty fucking greatly if we're being honest. generally speaking, it's when he *rejects* his father and everything that man represents that billy is at his *happiest* (lmao the epitome of an unfulfilled submissive sweetheart and bratty bossy bottom~<3<3<3)

there's a moment, where soldier boy says something along the lines of--

'--fuck you. you're weaker than he is.'

in regards to homelander. it's sort of glossed over, but this is billy's reaction to essentially being called a 'disgrace' so to speak by a toxic 'alpha male'.

y'all see that? it's a smile. lmao a smirk.

this is a moment where billy is protecting *ryan* and keeping his promise to becca. it's a moment where billy is *doing the right thing*, all on *his own* (mostly lol i'm sure there's a roundabout way to justify it in his head). and i think that's key.

it's not just a moment he's proud of himself and has a legitimate fucking reason to be proud of himself, (oh btw, we shoulda *all* been proud of billy in this moment), it's a moment he's *breaking through what his father made him* and his own *addiction*.

and he's doing it *selflessly* and--*without setting that responsibility on another person*.

so we *know* he has it in him, he always has. even becky *in the comic* kept trying to convince billy that *he is capable of good without her*. and again, we actually saw this in the second season when becca and ryan were reunited and billy *changed* his plans, *for becca*, instead of doing the selfish thing and selling ryan back to vought.

but if billy doesn't believe it himself...

i don't think billy is right about himself. but it is very *very* difficult for someone to *correct course* so to speak, once they have their *core beliefs*, lay out their own destiny and start along a *self fulfilling prophecy*, something him and homelander *both* do.

enter ryan.

and suddenly (lol probably in part due to reading dear becky lol), there was a bit of... not so much new, as *confirmed* perspective in play after that rewatch, something to *look* for and ponder in regards to *why* ryan may have been added for this story, a question in mind--

'would it be wrong of *ryan* to want to save his father?'

was it wrong of becca or becky, hughie or lenny, even his mum, to want to save billy?

how would *billy* even begin to answer such questions?

a different answer for the two would be a clear hypocritical bias (which lol i would not put past billy, but i also wouldn't be surprised if he maintained consistent thinking by answering *yes* to both)

. . .

y'all...

i still can't say i'm particularly optimistic about things turning out alright for either gent or ryan, butt~<3

garth ennis literally made the saddest, most pathetic, deliciously sweet, perfectly precious, extra emo tsun tsun baby boi ever, and put him right under our noses.

some a y'all fucking sneezing all over him, straight up sleepin' on all his *best* bits. how are we not utilizing billy butcher *properly~<3<3<3*????

;)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

[timona-lisa]

Welp, I finally finished watching the Timon and Pumbaa series and all in all, I really liked it. While it does have its flaws, it reminds me a lot of Animaniacs and it's a pretty fun ride. I love the theory that the whole show is basically a fever dream from a weird bug they ate (or possibly Rafiki's fanfic), it explains so much. The animation quality varies but when it's good, it's beautiful. Beethoven's Whiff and Bumble in the Jungle and The Sky is Calling? Great stuff. Honestly, The Sky is Calling might be my favorite episode, it's so silly and sweet.

The writing is also hilarious, though I can see why it's not everybody's cup of tea. There's a lot of high energy and slapstick and breaking the fourth wall and again, I'm a big Animaniacs and Looney Tunes fan and I genuinely love that stuff but to each their own. Some moments had me screaming and I can't give enough kudos to the voice cast, they're so amazing and giving it their all.

The heart of the show really is Timon and Pumbaa's relationship, though. As much as they bicker and have their misunderstandings, I love how soft and loyal and ride or die they are. Every time they reunited or gave a speech about how much the other meant to them-- (clutches heart) They're unironically one of my favorite Disney couples, even if the mouse is too cowardly to confirm it.

(AND NOW FOR THE FLAWS SECTION, I GOTTA RAMBLE ABOUT A COUPLE THINGS)

I feel like I gotta talk about Timon's characterization. Not gonna sugarcoat it, he can be an ASSHOLE in some episodes and while he (usually) learns a lesson, sometimes the show just lets him get away with it and yeahhh…I can see why that's a breaking point for some fans. Rafiki even called him a meerkat brat in one episode and I was like, "Well, he's not wrong." I guess it depends on your mood and how much you're willing to deal with his shtick for comedy and plot reasons. I definitely prefer his personality in the movies but there were enough funny and wholesome moments to keep him from being completely awful.

Another issue is the way they write women in the show. Aside from Shenzi and a couple others, they're mostly one-note and it makes me sad. I realize it's a comedy and it's not that deep but Animaniacs had Dot, Slappy, Rita, Hello Nurse, Minerva, Marita, Nora, Julia, etc. Not to mention, all the other iconic ladies from the Disney Afternoon lineup.

I know fandom loves to dunk on female characters (especially if they're love interests) and I don't wanna add to that dumpster fire but unfortunately, Timon and Pumbaa's love interests were pretty bland. Sharla had a couple funny moments but Tatiana was more of a plot device than a character. She had about three lines and the way they treated her like a prize to be won was just yikes. The episode Lights, Camera, Traction gave me secondhand embarrassment as well. Timon basically spends the whole time trying to get a kiss from a female meerkat (who doesn't even have a name) and he kinda comes off like Phil from Hercules and it's really…ew.

It's disappointing because in the end, it felt like they were only there because somebody in the writer's room or maybe a higher-up said, "THIS SHOW'S GETTING TOO FRUITY. LET'S GIVE THEM SOME GIRLS." It's some heterononsense, I tell ya. I'm glad that there's more variety in The Lion Guard anyway, even if it does fall into some of the same patterns. (Bunga and Binga? Really?)

Aside from that, though, it's not a bad show for what it is. It's a lot of fun and chaotic and heartwarming at times and if you're looking for something zany and unserious, I would still recommend it.

[sparepartshere]

Seraph of the End rant

I don’t think this fandom is even alive anymore, but hello, and please correct me if i’m wrong on any of this!

It might just be me, but I feel like many peoples trauma gets brushed over A LOT, and this post will literally just be me ranting about three characters in particular.

Kimizuki, Yoichi, and Mika.

Also, TW: Abuse, murder, suicide, mental health problems, abandonment, SA

First of all, starting off strong with the telephone pole himself, Kimizuki Shiho.

Yes, he’s pretty bitchy, but with reason. His sister is ill with a deadly virus, and he is so much more worried than he lets on. Now, as someone who hasn’t read much manga, (i’m catching up slowly), my knowledge roughly stops after S2 ends. However, I’m pretty sure there is a scene in a manga where the squad is hyping him up, though that could have been a fever dream, it shows again that he isn’t as tough as he lets on.

Now, onto the cinnamon roll known as Saotome Yoichi. Watched his sister get murdered by a vampire for no reason, then had a moment of recognition on the battlefield with LACUS FUCKING WELT. The fear in this mans eyes like- Kimizuki get your ass over here and comfort the fuck out of him, whether on the battlefield or after in his room. I would have sold my soul for that scene. And his trauma is, once again, ignored! Why?! He’s a cinnamon roll and needs comfort (yes, he’s stronger than he looks, but give that boy a hot chocolate, blanket, and some cuddles, STAT)

And, to wrap this up, we have the blond russian vamp himself, Hyakuya (or Shindo) Mikaela. Who, in my opinion, has some heavily brushed over issues. Like how he tried to get Yuu to not give him blood, which would have resulted in his death. Many times in that scene, he said he would rather die than live as a vampire. And I feel that the fact that that was basically an attempt was brushed over. And I have an inkling that that wasn’t the first. But alas, that may be my headcanons catching up to me. Also, not to mention the fact about the whole Livestock stuff and before then! His parents abused him, ans then threw him out of a moving vehicle. A moving. Fucking. Vehicle. And then was finally happy for a while. Then was livestock. Then had his found family murdered in front of him, stabbed, arm ripped off, turned into a vampire, and separated from the only family he had left. Also, isn’t there rumours of Ferid SAing him? Idk if that’s canon or not. Mans has been through shit, and there’s no way he’s okay in the head. I’m not, and I haven’t been through any of that.

BUT AAHHH WE NEED AN EPISODE(S) WHERE THEY COMFORT EACH OTHER AND OPEN UP ABT THEIR TRAUMA

also i’m writing this at midnight so this probs won’t make sense.

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

(also for all the ONS fanfic writers out there..if you happen to see this and accidentally write drabbles for it… :3)

[daddycassie]

Can you write me a fanfic where barb looks after me bc I'm infected with the flu

Alot of cuddles and TOOTH CRUMBLING FLUFF

🩷

Let Me Take Care of You Sweety

Pairing: Barb Azure x Fem! Reader, 516 words

Warnings: Sickfic, tooth-crumbling fluff <3

———————————

The second you show a single symptom of being even just possibly sick, Barb Azure is at your side, feeling all over your face for heat.

“Baby, you’ve got a fever” She’d say, looking at you with a soft expression.

She’d order you to rest. If you try to get up she won’t hesitate to force you back down on the bed — she’s actually pretty strong despite how she looks.

Lil bit of tough love.

“You ain’t gettin’ up from this bed sick, long as I live.” You think she’s sweet, but also VERY dramatic.

The rest of the covey is worried about you because Barb acts like the world is going to end as she scrapes together what she can to make you some soup.

Lucy Gray comes into your room a couple times a day for as long as your sick and either sings you a song or talks to you a bit, but if she notices you look tired she’ll leave you alone to sleep.

Maude Ivory brings you things. Toys, treats, trinkets, she thinks it’ll heal your ailment. She’d also try to cuddle you but Barb Azure put a stop to that real fast

“You’re not gettin’ sick too. Scoot!”

Tam Amber mysteriously, somehow, gets and brings you medicine. You’d stare at him in shock while he walks out.

Cc brings you flowers to your bedside. It’s sweet and all, but it definitely makes you feel like he’s treating the flu like you’re about to die.

Barb Azure spoon feeds you soup, it’s very starchy with some carrot in it. You’d offer her a smile.

“You got salt for me?”

She’d blush and shrug sheepishly.

“I thought it was only fair that your food has a bit of flavor. Ya don’t feel good sweety.”

You thank her, and eat the soup — the warmth is soothing.

When you find yourself aching Barb rubs your back, giving you a gentle, soothing massage. She’s clearly concerned, mumbling.

“My poor baby.” “I’m sorry honey.” “That’s it, you’re okay.”

You fall asleep peacefully… to a very odd dream.

Something about a mouse, the games, and somebody named Ida? You had no idea who that was.

You wake up in a cold sweat, forgetting where you are.

You shiver, swearing. Barb Azure and her sixth sense — she rushes in and holds you, assuring you it was a dream.

You cling to her while she tries to help you feel warm. It was an odd feeling for you — shivering in spring.

If you get a headache, you’ll notice the whole house becomes very, VERY quiet, it’s actually really unnerving.

Barb Azure claims she most certainly had nothing to do with it be she absolutely did and you both know it.

Overall — Barb Azure can be a bit overbearing, but she’s a very loving partner and she’ll always do her best to take care of you no matter what.

———————————

Note: This is my first time writing a fic for Barb, I like how it turned out even if it’s not the longest thing I’ve ever written — I adore Barb Azure and I want her to take care of me like this too tbh 💛

Anyway I hope you guys enjoyed 😚 I’m going to open requests again after this one!

[koolades-world]

DAMN SO IM NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO HAD A DU TO OBEY ME PIPELINE. that fandom made me worse and i think it made my life go downhill (/hj). i was so mean like we weren't all children with unrestricted internet access idk why i thought it was that serious </3 (sorry i was reading ur blog and saw a post responding to someone and i went "wait i minute" and had a few flashbacks)

OMG HEYYYY (more ex fandom ranting under the cut!)

first, welcome!! so glad you found a better fandom to migrate to and that you aren't stuck in the past like some people i knew. you are all good, no need to apologize. it's so crazy to me that i've encountered not one, but two ex du fans out in the wild! i thought there were about fifteen of us total lol. i know that war flashback feeling. was digging through old screenshots for something the other day and i found my stash and had to take a moment. sorry if some of this makes no sense or has odd flow. i'm word vomiting and i'm pretty tired rn (in the middle of drinking a matcha, coffee, and monster all at the same time). college has been sucking the life out of me, but i just had to answer this immediately

yeah it was absolutely wild man. i don't think anyone except like a few people liked me because to this day i'm still only friends with two of them. the way i was absolutely witched hunted i tell you :sob: i 100% made more enemies than friends. even my readers were mean, and i just took it all for some reason? i've been on tumblr for about a year and half now, and i haven't had a single mean fan, but back in the day, i think i had more than i can count. yes i was on wattpad for longer, but considering the ratio, that's crazy. i have about 2.2k followers here (love all of you guys mwa mwa) and i have zero mean fans. on wattpad i think i have like 260 something, and the fact that i cant count the amount of mean fans i had is insane. if i didn't have those friends, i would be convinced it was a fever dream. if you were on wattpad at the time, you'd understand how jarring the swap from that fandom to this one would be. fanfics are allowed? still kinda crazy to me actually. can't believe being an author is welcome here! im part of a zine now!!! i didn't think that was every going to happen. have no clue how the hell this pipeline happened, but hey! at least there's two examples lol. like i said before, i honestly cannot tell if it made me better or worse, but i can for sure think of all the ways it made me worse! haha.

yeah we were all kids with unrestricted internet access everyone was like 10 to 14. i was 13 or 14 when i entered the fandom and that was old LOL. can't believe i was the responsible adult in the room at 14! my now best friend was like 11 or so at the time. maybe its the trauma bonding or something, but we're basically siblings now. we are inseparable, package deal if you will. if you remember chev, i am exactly one day older than him lol <3 my favorite running joke but it also shows my age. the swap to this fandom was so odd, because now i'm a baby compared to everyone else lol. i can't believe i'm no longer a mediator or anything. this fandom is pretty unproblematic and it's so so refreshing to just be able to exist

if you knew who i was back in the day and didn't hate me, feel free to reach out! if you didn't still feel free to reach out haha. even if you didn't know me, you probably knew my best friend whether you liked it or not haha. i understand if you don't want to, but if you ever want to chat, i totally wouldn't mind! feel free to send me a dm and i can give you my discord. would be nice to get another outside perspective. if not, again, totally fine! have a wonderful day and hope you're recovering well. you're a fighter and deserve the best! hugs and kisses :)

[gayratdad]

Tag! You're It!

Thank you @lydiablackblade for thinking of me and the tag 🩷

Last song - Bad Blood (Taylors Version) my current album on repeat has been 1989 Deluxe Taylors Version 🩵🩵🩵

Favourite Colour - Baby Pink 🩷

Last Movie/Show - Last Movie was Asteroid City by Wes Anderson. I watched it with my partner and our friends and dear LORD! It was a trip. It was a post new years eve 2AM watch that feels like a fever dream. Last show is obviously Good Omens 🥺

Next on my watchlist - wellp, my partner and I are going through Mr. Robot for the second time. The first time, we never finished it, and that was like 5 years ago.

Last Game - Dome Keeper 😎😎

Last Book - The Spirit Bares It's Teeth by Andrew Joseph White. This one is!! Very good. Trans MC, late 1800 London, gothic academic medical horror vibes.

Sweet/savoury/spicy - I'm not really sure on this, I was a major sweet tooth when I was young. Now I feel I lean more towards Savoury. It also really depends on what I'm feeling at the moment. I do like Spicy but unfortunately my tongue does not agree 😭

Relationship Status - Engaged 👨‍❤️‍👨👬

Last thing I googled - bc transcript service

Greatest Flaw - uhhhmm. I'm a perfectionist. It's hard for me to let things be "not perfect" and it's even harder for me to try new things because I know I won't be perfect on the first try. Re: Finishing my fanfics that I've started and posted 😖😖 I worry that people will hate that it's not perfect or if it took a weird turn.

I just finished their fic, Demonology and it's !!!!! My fave good omens work EVER! So I'm excited to continue the journey and keep reading this one

Current Obsession - Good Omens. That's it. Nothing else. 🐍🐍🐍🪽🪽🪽 They take up all of my thoughts 24/7.

Fic I'm currently reading -

Angel-Centered Therapy Through A Multicultural Lens: An Integrative Approach

No pressure tag(s) @turquoisedata and @moss-sprout if you'd like! No pressure :3

🩷🩷🩷

*The questions are pasted in the comments for copying :)

[lottiecrabie]

Found your Tumblr from your fanfic story “Experiments” with Michelle and Joseph from the show Mixte 1963/Voltaire High.

Just came here to show some appreciation and thankfulness, because that story was great and so well written. And since there’s less than two handfuls of fanfics written for them, thank you so much for writing such an amazing piece.

And hopefully you continue to write stories for that pairing.

And HIGH HOPES that the show gets a renewal for more seasons regardless of being cancelled back in 2021/2022.

omg this ask makes me feel like a mom having guests over like oh lord we need to clean the house everyone chop chop! thank you so much! i’m so happy you appreciated my momentary brainrot<3 very touched at all the kind compliments<3 i doubt i’ll write more for them as it was kind of just a week long fever dream, but i do hope they get picked up for a season 2 with their newfound popularity and, hey, maybe that’d get me to open a google doc for them again !

[silverstormsxx]

Poor, Delicate Soul - An Undertale OC Fanfic

The monsters of the Underground came in many shapes and sizes. Goats, skeletons, ghosts... you name it, there was probably a corresponding monster.

As such, it should be no surprise that there existed a species of monsters who were indistinguishable from thick, slimy piles of inky pitch-black goop.

You and your family lived in the dark crevices of Snowdin, buried deep within its frosted woods. None of you had the capacity to stand the light that seemed to seep into every corner of the Underground, so you were forced to remain in the darkness for the rest of your life.

How wonderful.

...

Sometimes, when you were tired of the endless tea parties that you held in order to keep yourself entertained in the unending blackness, you drew.

Nothing fancy, mind you. Just little doodles and sketches of what you wanted your life to be like.

For one, you wanted an actual body. Preferably, a feminine one. One with long, luscious raven hair that shone in the sunlight (In your fantasies, Monsterkind was set free from their banishment and living happily on the surface with no problems whatsoever. Also, you could withstand the light radiated from the sun for.. whatever reason) and pale, unnaturally white skin. Your eyes were an an empty and bottomless void-like ebony, to go along with your hair - and you wore.. a dress.

Not just any dress, no no no - a dress you had seen in a dream once, when you were much, much younger - around 4 years old. One you had never forgotten, and one that could never leave your mind, even for a moment.

The dress itself was the most glamorous thing you had ever seen. It was an alluring shade of african violet, covered in every inch with sparkles that lit up the entire room like a disco ball. The gloves that went with it were an exquisite shade of floral lavender, similarly shining. It was a gown fit for a star. A gown fit for you, and only you.

In your dreams, you were a radio star. Despite your obvious and apparent beauty, the thought of appearing on camera made your very SOUL quiver in fear. You would be able to ramble on and on about a variety of topics - tea, fashion, makeup... whatever the case may be.

You would be adored by everyone else in the world. You would shine so brightly that you would escape the darkness that had held you captive for as long as you can remember...

And look into the light for once.

But that was merely a fever dream. One filled with hope, yes, but still merely a delusion to keep yourself from going insane.

You lifted your pencil off the paper you were doodling on. The paper in question had a large stain on it - a glob of your murky goop. Which then began to spill onto the table, creating a huge mess in the process.

... You had gotten used to this over the years fortunately.

Sighing, you began to shuffle your way towards your bedroom, dragging yourself along the floor.

You would deal with the.. situation with the coffee table after a quick nap to clear your mind, regardless of what your parents thought. You were much too tired to deal with it now.

Slipping your way underneath your door frame, you were about to begin the arduous process of tucking yourself into bed before a thought crossed your mind.

You had been born with a little extra goop on you than your parents. It didn't interfere with your daily life, of course, nor were you oversized - but it was still notable.

Maybe if you used that extra bit of matter to your advantage...

You begin to make your way towards your mirror, a new feeling blooming within yourself.

Staring at your reflection, which currently showed a useless, hideous, pathetic puddle that should've been swept up a long time ago, you began to internally visualize your true self.

I want to reach the hearts and SOULs of billions, you told yourself. You could feel your body beginning to mold itself into a humanoid form. I want everyone to hear my voice and think of the woman who glowed brighter than even the shinest star.

You opened your eyes (Since when did you close them? And since when did you even have eyes, for that matter? Bleh, who cares?) and in the mirror..

You saw someone beautiful.

---

Sans was having a normal day, all things considered.

Papyrus was hanging out with Undyne in Waterfall, Grillby had warned him to get to paying off his tab yet again, and he was taking a peaceful, relaxing nap in a new store he found a few days ago in the woods even though he knew damn well he was supposed to be on patrol.

All in all, everything was going as per usual.

He didn't know why he thought otherwise.

"must've just been me being a bonehead." He laughed at his own joke, before promptly yawning and closing his sleepy eyes.

...

"Hhhhhh..."

What was that?

He opened his eyes, slowly rubbing the sleeping off them.

"don't ya know it's rude to wake someone up-" He began, only to immediately stop talking when he felt something dribbling down his leg.

His blurry vision cleared shortly after, and he met face to face with a monster made entirely out of a strange, liquidy substance.

They appeared to be taking on a vaguely human-looking form, though they were clearly having trouble maintaining it, judging by the fact that they were actively dripping and leaking onto the snow, painting it an abyssal black.

Their eyes had no kind of light in them whatsoever, and yet they looked at him with such manic intensity that made him instinctively tense up, even of he kept the same composed, laid-back demeanor he always had.

"Hhhhi.." They eventually managed to force out, and by now he suspected that their vocal cords were somehow melded with their throat, preventing them from speaking properly, "Mmmmy nnname issssssss Vvvioletta..."

They - Violetta, he reminded himself - began to creep closer to him, and their eyes glinted in the light of Snowdin.

"Wwwwhat isssssssss yourssssssss?"

---