#this shit isnt even completely my fault. still fucking sucks

[killjpeg-reblogs]

I'm kinda freaking out that im a failing adult just from social standpoint. Im so fucking unpleasant to have around

[ihatehannibal]

Everything is so fucking shitty lately, I lied through my teeth to my psychiatrist bc I don't want him to blame it on me reducing my SSRI dose & insist I stabilize again. it's bc my friends are all so...completely ambivalent about me I guess? like ok there's my best friend, who I've been long distance with since the we met online ten years ago but who I've never FELT this distant from in all that time. it's been like this for a year, since she moved to Japan, but again it's not like she lived close to me before, she's Canadian. I don't even know who's fault it is but we don't talk like we did before. It's probably her fucking boyfriend giving her the emotional support that I used to give her. She doesn't rly need me anymore. I don't want it to end I really thought we were platonic soulmates and I thought we'd be 80 together still best friends. Maybe that's just me being naive. This is how it goes with friendships for normal women isn't it, they eventually find a partner & then suddenly you're no longer #1 for them. You can't compare

Then there's my second best friend, who IS local & who I've known for 14 years...since we were 14 and starting high school. I've known her as long as I didn't know her. and yet she has let me down more times than I can count & I'm sure I've let her down the same. Every time I try to talk to her about what's going on I just end up feeling like shit bc she tells me I'm triggering her or whatever. Ok. Like she rly said "I'm not the sort of person who can hear this stuff & go on my merry way" I'm sorry I said like four sentences about what happened with the guy w/the gun but how the fuck do you think I feel having to LIVE this shit firsthand??? Pop quiz do I fucking sound like I'm going on my merry way about it or do I sound traumatized???? I feel emotionally distant from her too & don't even know if I want to keep being friends but I'm a coward so I'll probably just let it fade rather than making a clean break.

Then there's my third & final friend, who I've known the longest but who I only recently reconnected with. She's fun to hang out with but that's only when she doesn't flake & leave me on read for a month, which she does so consistently that I'm ready to just stop trying.

It sucks seeing my sister with all these super strong bulletproof friendships, both local & abroad, that she formed in primary school & more in college (years that I entirely wasted being a depressed shut in) & are still going strong. She's always going out for drinks with them or watching movies on FaceTime & I'm here alone in my room binge eating & watching fucking greys anatomy of all things wondering if I will ever have a successful life with a friend group I can count on & knowing deep down that the answer is no.

I feel like I don't even ask for much. Like yes I want to be a famous writer ideally but I think I'd be happy just writing my stuff for a niche audience & having a bunch of fucking friends to do things & go places with. I'm not even looking forward to my Japan trip anymore bc my best friend isnt even excited to see me for the first time in 5 yrs & I probably can't save up enough anyways due to having to pay the mortgage on this fucking house the whole summer which was when I had the most work. Now I'm gonna be lucky to get two days a week & have only Saturday ON shift guaranteed. I couldn't save up anything when I had the chance so now I'm screwed

Oh and my room is a fucking stye again. A real depression den. Kratom powder & empty junk food wrappers & dirty clothes all over the floor & bed. Unreal how I keep letting it get this bad repeatedly

[lostjudgmnt]

i nearly just oosted this plain but i at least still gave the mental whatever the fuck to put it under a cut sorry guys i’ll be normal in a minute cw for me having some sort of meltdown though idk. pretty intense shit

i love…………. this fucked up mental cycle im in where. im just having a really nasty mixed episode rn so im like. my sleep is so off im rapidly swinging from feeling completely fine to have violent fucking melt/breakdowns/shutdowns to being actually decently happy maybe to having terrible ocd spikes and spirals and its been months and i cant tell if its getting better or not and am pretty convinced in actuality faking the whole thing even though the worst of it is happening when im completely fucking alone and i cant tell if my thoughts are my own or if im pretending to be someone who isnt me and tbese “symptoms” are just me pretending im someone im noy but convincing myself its real or something i dont fucking know but im going fucking crazy but im not telling anyone but i feel like im in a pressure cooker and i feel like im under too mich pressure to be normal and okay and not kill myself even though its all too much pressure

like it sucks because the fact that i kind of feel like im completely fine but also like im going absolutely insane at the same time is not helping the fact that im convincing myself that my intrrusive thoughts and spirals and obsessions and whateber else i have going on are all fucking fake and im just putting on some sort of fucked up show for myself or something like im pretending to be someone else so i feel ~different~ and ~special~ and mentally ill because i guess its fucking fun qnd quirjy as opposed to literally so fucking miserable and preventing me from sleeping wnd locking my body up in uncomfortable positions that i can’t really move from but i can AOMETIMES so im just doing yhat to myself for FUN like goddamn. im not making any sense and part of me is telling me i should be correcting all these typos because godforbid i dont fucking sanitize myself because if it looks too raw its more proof that im faking all this shit and pretending yo look like im doing badly or whatever because im fine actually i feel fine!!!!!!!! what fuckung ever.

i actively hide that im actually driving myself insane from myself abd others because i feel like i have to at least pretend im doig well and then i get hurt when no one can tell im doing poorly as if its not ky own fucking fault and then convince myself that its not actually that bad and that its all fake actually and im making everything i experience up or exaggerating everything or what fucking ever when im having violent and geaphic intrusive thoughts about myself and compulsively beating my head against the floor when im completely alone and there’s sno one to see it like obviously thats fucking fake right. nesus chrisy

i shouldnt post this and maybe poisting it is hust another sign that this is all made up and im just doing it for attention i cant steas enough that im just calmly sitting in a chair at my best friend’s house alone in the dark whole typing this right now i literally feel completely normal but also i guess apparently absolutely insane at the same time but maybe i dont feel insanw. but also i was hyperventilating and slamming my head yo the ground qns could hardly move my body on the floor like i dunno 20 minutes ago and my head hurts. but maybe that was fakw too. i dont even know who’s thoughts are in my head right now

i dont know i guess i feel like i need to actually make some sort of record of this shit somewhere but i’ll ignore it if its somewhere completely private but i’ll want to kill myself even more if its somewhere like q diacord server for some reason so here’s the only place i feel i can go. i dont fucking know why. maybe because here someone can reassure me but i dont have to freak the fuck out of the people i actually interact with on w daily basis or something. i dont know. i dont know if any of this is actually me or if any of this is real and i dint even know if im gonna look at this later because maybe i dont want to know if its all real or not. i dont fucking know

im trying to will myself to take my LITERAL MEDICATION i got prescribed to treat my DIAGNOSED FUCKING BIPOLAR DISORDER that im convinced isnt fucking real and wouldnt becausing me to be insane for any reason. goddamn. im shit at taking it the way imsupposed to because im supposed to take it in the morning to but i dont do mornings and have no routine for the mornings at all. i need time figure that the fuck out and maybe it wilp fix me but maybe not because im probably fakung all this shit anyway and meds cant fix what isn’t actually there. jesus christ

i know i sound insane btw i still cant tell if thats “proof” of anything, authenticity or otherwise i dont fucking know. shit.

im moving in m getting up from sitting completely calmly in this chair and im taking my pm meds as diagnosed and im gonna go upstairs to lay down in the guest bed across the room from my best friend who went to bef almost an hour ago and im gonna sleep and im gonna wake up as a normal person and none of this is real and im being overdramatic and fake. good fucking night

[vaatistaxevasion]

Why do all my coworkers think it's okay to argue with the managers when they tell you to fucking do something??? Have I ever told you to do something that I have not done??? Have I ever looked down my nose at you and smiled maniacally as I, in my lust for power, have commanded you to do something completely unnecessary??? I'm trying to do my fucking JOB and I AM GETTING IN TROUBLE for it NOT GETTING DONE because IM THE MANAGER IT'S MY JOB TO MAKE THIS PLACE RUN and ALL OF /MY/ MANAGERS HAVE BEEN GETTING ONTO ME FOR YEARS ABOUT TELLING OTHER PEOPLE TO DO THINGS AND NOT JUST TRYING TO DO IT ALL MYSELF

THIS IS WHAT I AM SUPPOSED TO DO

IF I TELL YOU TO GET THE FUCKING CHICKENS, YOU NEED TO GET THE FUCKING CHICKENS, IF I SAY MAKE BISCUITS, MAKE THE FUCKING BISCUITS!!! THIS IS NOT A JOKE IT ISNT OPTIONAL YOU HAVE YO DO IT I AM THIS CLOSE TO SENDING SOMEOME HOME FOR REAL

I CAN DO YOUR JOB AND MY JOB AND HIS JOB WHY CAN YOU NOT JUST FUCKING DO YOUR OWN RIGHT

CAME IN TO A FUCKING LAUNDRY LIST OF SHIT I HAD TO DO BEFORE I COULD EVEN GET STARTED BC EVERYONE ELSE WANTS TO HAVE FUN AND TAKE IT EASY INSTEAD OF WORKING I AM SO SICK OF THE SHIT

"I'm not gonna keep trying to fix what night shift does wrong." Uh, hate to break it to you, but even if it's not your fault the meats are all messed up, they STILL NEED TO BE FIXED because they are BECOMING WASTE

NO it's not your fault that night shift sucks!!!! I'm fucking working on it the best I can!!! But if you are on the meat end I fucking expect you to upkeep it like you're supposed to when!! You're!! The meat person!!!

I swear to god and then after they pitch a fit about being told to do things they should already be doing anyway they still do the bare minimum unless I'm hovering over their god damn shoulders!!! I told this bitch to get the chickens out of meat department's cooler two days ago!!! He got HALF of them!!!! MOTHERFUCKER!!!! NOW IM GETTING MY NEXT CHICKEN TRUCK TODAY AND YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO GET THEM BOTH AND IM NOT ASKING NICELY THIS TIME

FUCK I HATE EVERYBODY SOMETIMES

[poorlilpubby]

Okay get ready. Spoilers obvi.

So disappointed. Heres what pissed me off the most. When Gabby asked "is it a terrorist attack" okay wow the first thing to come to a kids mind is terrorism, and we all know its not domestic. Thanks western media for demonizing other cultures

This is just a societal problem ig. Well if im continuing on the track of not rlly the movies fault is how people treat victims/people with mental illness.

Almost every single new character was a shitty fucking person. Terrifier 2 the characters were kinda douchy, but they weren't complete assholes. For example the mom. She treated her kids pretty shittily. But you can still empathize with her. The parents here? So fucking bland. And treat sienna like a demon

This entire movie was like the 2nd movie but worse in basically every regard. Like oooo art is making his way to sienna 🙄 like sienna knows art is coming but come onnnn genuinely no tension. ESPECIALLY BECAUSE IT KEPT CUTTING BACK AND FORTH with hardly any connection!!! Felt like a shitty anthology movie.

Another similarity, the fucking kills. Idk if its supposed to be a reference to the first movie but like cmon another splitting the body in half? Ohhh scaryyy its with a guy this time.

Art pissing on Santas lap, we saw him like shit before like is this supposed to be just for humor? I saw it coming from a mile away with the christmas theme and santa.

I feel really bad for gabbys actor bc ik people will treat her like shit. The character gabby was so fucking annoying. YES I KNOW SHES A KID. A kid that has absolutely no sense of respect but understands terrorism and ughhhhh. Anyway, no hate to the actress but mmm character isnt the best.

HERE'S WHAT PISSES ME OFF THE MOST ABOUT HER CHARACTER. She has almost absolutely no fucking role in the movie. Her only, tiny tiny bit of need to be in the movie is towards the end. WHICH IS JUST THE SAME ACTIONS JOHNATHONHAD. EXCEPT JOHNATHON HAD DEPTH TO HIS CHARACTER AND ACTUALLY DID STUFF LAST MOVIE. Holy shit his character in the last movie was so good bc they mentioned slightly how young guys are indoctrinated into really fucked up conservative viewpoints!!! AND THEY FUCKING THREW AWAY HIS CHARACTER IN THIS FILM.

WHERE THE FUCK WAS JOHNATHON. FUCKING NOWHERE WHYYYYY. I was promised that his role would be bigger in this film. FUCKING LIES.

Instead he was replaced with gabby, and not even to further the plot, it was the exact same thing. They introduced the most bland characters to kill them off and leave us where? Not any further than the previous movie.

Like, the last movie introduced sienna with her friends and family. Great world building. But they introduced a neice out of fucking nowhere?? "She missed you so much" I HAD NO IDEA WHO THEY WERE TALKING ABOUT. I genuinely thought "did Johnathan transition or smth" bc that felt more reasonable than a random neice.

THE FUCKING TINY LITTLE ONES LINERS SUCKKED. Gabbys "you know im nosy" was literally just Johnathan's like "we're family" but so soulless. THEIR CONNECTION WAS SUPER FUCKING WEAKKK. Johnathan and siennas relationship felt so much better, stronger, more genuine, realistic whatever. It made so much more sense. Siblings that argue but still love each other regardless. AND IT WAS THROWN AWAY IN THIS MOVIE. For what? For sienna to be like "oh gabby ur so so precious" ugh

And now their relationship is so strained in this movie? I mean that can be expected but it was really just saddening. AND OH MY FUCKING GOD JOHNATHON GOT AN OFFSCREEN KILL? I KNEW THAT SKULL WASNT GABBYS BUT THE FACT THAT IT WAS JOHNATHONS WAS SO HEARTBREAKING. i kept thinking "please please Jonathan come through and kick art's ass" BUT NO. Gabby fucking hit him in the back once? What fucking everrrrr.

Im so tired of the "little girl doesnt get hurt trope" because why? This is a fucking sadistic demon we're talking about. Absolutely no one is spared. And just because someone is a little girl doesnt mean they're more deserving of life than someone else? Like, sorry its just, so many other people didnt deserve any of their treatment. But no one will care if they die bc they're not "innocent" little girls. This is a whole nother issue that i dont wanna get into rn.

Ik the beginning scene was a cold open but like...none of that related to the main story. Ik terrifier movies suck with plot but that was stupid. THEY PUT SO MUCH EMPHASIS ON THE LETTER WITH "ART WILL FOLLOW YOU ANYWHERE SIENNA AND KILL EVERYONE IMPORTANT TO YOU" but art killed ummm the most random people?

The family in the beginning was killed for the trailer but no other reason. The mall kills i get, bc he was close to sienna and yknow he kills along the way.

Back to the bar scene, again no real reason however i will say i enjoyed it. The two girls on santas lap was a good reference to the first movie. The drunk girls doing something stupid. THATS A GOOD REFERENCE. omg and art was so cute when he saw santa and was like "santa!! 🥺"

Otherwise, bar scene kinda ehhhhh. I lowkey love when art uses a gun tho. Ik some people hated when he used a gun but i love it. He's like so pissed off he doesn't give a fuck about being super sadistic anymore.

Okay im talking about it now. Vicky. The very beginning i was like hmmm idk how i feel about this, maybe she'll grow on me. SPEAKING OF BEGINNING HIII CHRIS JERICHOOO 🥰🥰

But slowly her character kept getting worse and worse. Was she supposed to be that um...eccentric? Its not that eccentric is bad its just not clicking in this film?

Then. The worst plot point. The thing that made me actually roll my eyes in the theater. When art used her as a vessel and basically whatever she was saying was what art was saying. ART. IS. SUPPOSED. TO. BE. SILENT. Idc if the clown is still silent. NEVER EVER WAS HE MEANT TO TALK. FUCK. SO FUCKING ANNOYING. And its not like the words were impactful. They could've easily been expressed (at least the idea) without words!!!

And what happened to the little girl? Like literally what? Okay weird. She complimented arts character much more than vicky tho

FINALLY. HERE'S WHAT I LIKED.

The actors were wonderful. Even if I didnt like the characters, they sold it. The shitty blonde girl mia, her actress is amazing bc oh my god ik girls like that. She did great. RETURNING ACTORS SO AMAZING. DAVID HOWARD THORTON BEING AMAZING AS ALWAYS.

Lauren lavera as sienna? Oh that emotion was gooodddddd. The thrashing was so perfectly good, not like a fish or anything.

ELLIOT FULLAM AS JOHNATHON. HE'S SUCH A COOL GUY. Little punk people!!! Omg and that one reference "Johnathan doesnt like metal anymore" oh if only you knew the guy. Omg and like, elliot is such a chill guy. So when he started trashing the dorm? I was so impressed it felt really passionate.

Gore was uhhh average. Soundtrack was good. Umm it luckily didnt run on too long. That was my biggest gripe with the last movie, it was way too long.

Ugh this movie was supposed to be the revenge!! NONE OF THAT HAPPENED. BECAUSE ART CAME BACK TO LIFE AT THE END. This is just the trend, the third movie is always the worst.

So um ig I'll rate this move a 4/10...i probably have more to say but whatever

I think I might be the only one in this theater!! I can't wait to see my baby Art the Clown 🥰🥰 I hope it'll be good, I avoided every single spoiler this time

[littlebabycrybtch]

“lol how many ppl thought they were ~asexual~ bc of (ignorance, supporting ignorant exclusionists, silencing attempts at ace education) Tunglr” wow fun headcount anyways how many aspecs attempted suicide before age 21 bc adults constantly insisted your identity was fake and you were going to be sexy and normal someday lmfao

[hxneekyuu]

accidental kiss || tsukishima kei, ennoshita chikara, miya atsumu, lev haiba

request :  Hey Can I request a headcanon or one shot with Haikyuu characters (any of your choices) having an accidental kiss with their crush, you know, the cliché romance scene in drama's where the girl fell and male catches her and end ups kissing, or something when the girl turn around not noticing the close distance between the male, and their lips touches. Anything that is accidental

warnings : miya atsumu, Suna Gets a Haircut

a/n : so i did one of those random hq generator things bc i could only decide on one boi and that was tsukki,,, the results made me laugh so here you go -- btw these are all gonna be pre-dating bc thats just wonderful we love that

tsukishima kei

this is definitely all tsukkis fault

you two are at your house just vibing and at some point you head into the kitchen to make food

and hes leaning against the counter right in front of the cabinet you need to get to

but he has the audacity not to move the fuck outta the way when you tell him you need to get past 

so youre like ok fuck it and just reach around him to open it 

but the bowl you need is pretty high up so youre like on your tippy toes tryna get the damn thing and hes just sitting there watching you struggle 

instead of helping you like he isnt damn near 6′3″

but riiiiight as youve got the bowl, you end up grabbing it a little too forcefully and you bring like a million dishes down with it 

so ofc even though he definitely deserves it, youre not trying to concuss the poor guy with literal ceramic dishes raining down on him 

so you kinda lunge forward to stop them all from falling 

and, hearing the crash of dishes over his head, he naturally ducks because he doesnt want to die

honestly,,,, its more of a crash of your noses and foreheads but theres such chaos of like,,, trying not to die?? 

that at some point you just feel his mouth on yours and it deadass just stays there while you both are figuring out what the hell is happening 

eventually he kinda pulls back but only a little bc he knows youre struggling to hold onto the dishes and he doesnt wanna screw that up

and he doesnt even say anything he just reaches up awkwardly and helps you set the dishes back on the shelf

and then he grabs the bowl youd been trying the get the entire time and hands it to you with a completely blank face 

its a very awkward dinner im not gonna lie

mostly bc at some point he just starts cracking jokes about it and refuses to acknowledge it seriously bc he sucks

ennoshita chikara

ennoshita’s taking a break from studying with the second years on the team

mostly bc he never gets any studying done with them 

so youre studying together for a test at his house

and its just been many many hours of studying so ofc youre both exhausted

so its not surprising to him when you just pass out on your notes

but the thing is,,, your heads right on top of a sheet that he needs

and for a while he just kinda studies without it

he studies other stuff and tries to remember it on his own so he can fill in the gap in his notes

but eventually hes like fuck i really need these notes

so he just,,, tries to slide it out from under your head really carefully

and it involves a lot of him getting really close and trying to lift your head and a bunch of really soft cute things that would be super embarrassing for him to be caught doing

like,,, if you happened to wake up

which of course, you do

and youre really confused bc you can feel his breath fanning over your face and his eyes are really close but not focused on you, theyre focused on smth under your face

so you lift your head to see what hes doing

but he freaks out and moves his face when he notices youre awake

and its just a litto brush of your lips over his as your faces are passing each other

but the poor bub jumps back like you just shocked the crap out of him

and then he apologizes for like the next ten minutes and its impossible to get back to studying bc youre both just panicking internally

miya atsumu

this literally happens like it does in the movies

it all starts with a chase scene

that really you should never have been a part of

youre just minding your business walking down the hall after school on your way to get your stuff

and its pretty empty bc you had a club thing so its late afternoon and no ones around

and you just hear it

men screaming

and then he appears, barreling around the corner like his life depends on it

and youre like

this cant be good

and when he sees you hes yelling out for you like HELP ME 

but you somehow always manage to get caught in the miya twin antics so youre like

fuck no im out

but apparently youre not out bc atsumus grabbing your arm and dragging you behind him yelling smth about scissors and a haircut

and when you look back you just see suna rounding the corner, half of his little triangle haircut chopped off so he looks like a sad half onigiri,,,

but you know it was atsumu and that this man is definitely dead when suna catches him

so youre like okay fuck it i guess im helping him AGAIN 

and you get outside to a section of the school where theres still sports teams practicing and lots of people around so you hide in a corner together

but the Suna Energy is approaching so atsumu fuckin freaks and does that cheesy movie thing where he ducks his head down so he wont be seen 

but theres like a group of guys passing by and one of them just bumps into atsumus back and that shit just sends him right into you

and all he can think is “oops”

he only has one brain cell give him a break

but he just stalls completely and forgets about the whole suna thing

but ofc his hair is fucking piss yellow and suna has not forgotten

he ends up totally getting his ass beat  but after that little smooch atsumus definitely a bit keen to see you more often 

lev haiba

i fucking love this gif look at the litto shoyou go

this tall babie does not know the meaning of personal space he has no functional understanding of a Bubble

honestly he probably gets dangerously close to kissing you on a regular basis, considering you’re seatmates in class

he’s just ALWAYS in your space

at first he’s probably shy bc he doesn’t know you

but once you become friends he’s like THIS IS NOT YOUR DESK THIS IS JUST MY SECOND DESK

so every day there’s always one thing that’s super dangerous

last week it was him looking over your shoulder while you did work silently

yesterday it was him reaching across you to open the window on your left side

today he just really wants a bite of the bread you bought and are currently already eating

and when he wants smth, he gets Very Whiny

he’s so clingy and adorable that you can’t ever get mad

he’s like a little puppy how can you resist him

so when you’re finally like okay fine you can have a bite he’s like

MONCH

he doesn’t even wait for you to tear off a piece he just leans in for a bite

but you had said yes while in the middle of biting it so he essentially does that thing where you’re both biting it at the same time

but, again, he doesn’t know what personal space means

so he also doesn’t have the ability to gauge distances well

so he straight up just meets you halfway and presses his mouth to yours while he’s biting down

the boi probably doesn’t even notice

he just pulls back quickly once he has his bite and goes about his life

you literally are going to have to tell him he just kissed you

and after that he’s a total fucking mess

he doesn’t know what to do he never knows what to do

he’s just going to keep causing Chaos while he panics

[all-the-heart-you-cannot-see]

Just me, reviewing yet another teen drama, Fate: the winx saga edition.

The highlights of the season for me were Musa and Riven, Flora finally making an appearence and the friendship between Stella a Beatrix.

Now onto the plot, i think it was a solid idea, it carried on from season one with the Aster Dell thing and i can kinda see the point of Sebastian, he's just too much of a caricature evil to inspire anything else. I did thought it was weird at the end the rest of the blood witches just....left, like, what the fuck lol, felt like a lazy way to tie up loose ends, like yeah their leader is gone but surely those people still want their loved oned back. Also i have beef with however is tasked with designing their transformations, theres no outfit change, the wings look werid once the montage is over and i hate that its probably because they want to give it "realism" ITS A SHOW ABOUT MAGICAL FARIES RICHARD, GIVE THEM SPARKLY OUTFITS.

Into the characters!

Bloom is not my favorite, she's okay, not bad for a main character, just a bit repetitive. It did bother me at the end when she told sky he was the most important person in her life when i think through out the season she had more meaningul scenes with her friends than with him. And their relationship is kind of not it, they have awful comunkcation and when she confromts him about it he says he doesnt tell her about his problems because she is the answer which, ok cute honey but you need comunication for a relationship to work. Idk, they are very vanilla but, they could be written better.

Sky's struggles made for an interesting arc this season, he went through some pretty fucked up shit and it sucks that the season ended for him with his girlfriend basically unaliving herself as far as he is concerned. One thing i like about this show is that no character has as a motivation only his love interest which is why i appreciate they gave Sky something to do this season besides Bloom. Im interested to see how he handles his loss next season.

I cannot stress enough how much i liked Musa this season, i love how they handle her relationship with her powers and she and Riven finally interacting made my freaking week. I hope they let her keep training to be an Specialist next season and i hope somebody gets the idea of giving a combat magic class, its kind of ridiculous a room full of fairies with different types of magic couldnt come up with a plan to try an scape and instead waited patiently to be rescued while being drained one by one.

Riven, Riven, Riven. His fallout with Beatrix and Dane was kind of inevitable, i do love myself some badass female grey character but relationships without affective responsability are doomed from the begining, it was definitely something while it lasted. I like the little moments when you realize he isnt a complete asshole, like when he brought each girl a drink that suited their taste or when he explained to Musa that it wasnt that he didnt want to train her because she was a woman, but because they were on the brink of war and it was dangerous for her. He cares, and i care about him, i just want him a Musa to be a happy couple.

Terra's personality annoys me so much lol, i know a girl just like her in really life and it annoys the shit out of me when i know something is right and she comes acting like she knows best and everybody elses work is mediocre, this is unrelated to the writing of her character really, is just an unfortunate coincidence. Her coming out arc was nice and her scenes with the specialist were kind of sweet but i dont think they have chemestry with each other. There's not much more to say about her, she isnt my favorite character and i doubt she'll grow on me but thats nobody's fault.

AISHAAAAAA, i like her a lot, i think they could've given her more scenes with Grey. Like at the end she tells him he lied to her for months and....i dont think we even got a scene of them just...hanging out besides the one where they kissed, i would've loved to see more of their relationship on screen and i would like for them to explore what he told her the day they left the pub about her not having to carry the weight of her friends, she is the smartest but she should allow herself to be a teen (this goes for every one of those poor girls, if Sebastian had any good point, it was the fact that they should be enjoying their lives as teenagers).

Stella, i know we all miss the og cartoon Stella, but if they were going to change her character i dont think this is that bad of a change. I mean the image of her back covered in blood because she was trying to get rid of the gem was heartbreaking and she has had good progress with letting people in and forming genuine bonds with the girls, i enjoyed her friendship with Beatrix, hope they bring her back.

Flora is a 10/10 would recomend, badass bitch all the way, i dont think the show gave her all the praise that she needed, she literally took on dozens of magic sucking thingies to save everybody without a second thought, Bloom was ready to risk it all for 17 y/o boy next door but Flora was out here bringing the brains AND the muscle, they need to thank her appropietly. I also like that she is between nerdy and an extrovert, i feel like we only get those types of characters as a popular girl is secretly smart, Flora is just smart and outgoing and confident and its refreshing.

I support womens rights, but most importantly, i support Beatrix's wrongs. She was raised by Rosalind and Andreas and their dubious morals, she lost her father, her emotional suport boytoys and got pushed aside by the woman she thought would helo her discover more things about herself, i cant imagine feeling that alone and i 100% understand her actions. Hope they bring her back next season.

Thats all, ill watch next season, its a shame we were depruved of sparkly fairy outfits, but i doubt that'll change.

[savnofilter]

I think you're hilarious in such a good way and Im new to Tumblr. Your work is amzing and i was wondering if you have any bnha blog recommendations or must read fics?

WARNING! this gets long as SHIT. so im sorry. im on mobile so liek,, also there are shit ton of amazing writers on here but my memory has been terrible as of recently, so sorry about that. all the people mentioned have really good fics so going through their masterlist is the bes option i have on here for you!! also sorry this was so late, i did a lot of username checking and now finally got the balls to post this with their @s cnuidwneovn- also!! be mindful because i was iffy in tagging some because i wasnt too sure if they wrote for bnha anymore. so w/o further adieu!!!now for my fave ao3 fics (with no ranking)~

His Tryanny by goodboysensei (tumblr; @tobobio)

au: fantasy

summary: “Deep in a land just like in the fairy tales, lives 4 different kingdoms. But when a hot headed king of one kingdom wants to take over, he seeks for more power. A girl locked away in a tower for her entire life because of her forbidden power, finds a new life when an ash blonde male comes flying through her window. How will their life play out?”

my thoughts: FUCKINGT AMAZING BOOK LIKE I FUCKING STAN. TT its so fucking good! the angst, the tension, angry bloody bakugo?! fucking check! amazing book!! 12/10 will always recommend. mc will say “million reasons” i be like “his tyranny tho, 👀” (and other books but we have to appreciate my highness rq).

completed: yis!

My Angel by goodboysensei (tumblr; @tobobio)

au: greek mythology

summary: “The infamous fallen angel, serving under Hades (AFO), Bakugou Katsuki, was known for constantly wreaking havoc within heaven. Defying against God and other deities, he was blacklisted from Heaven. (l/n) (y/n) being an elite archangel under Athena (Miruko), is set on a mission to rid of Bakugou Katsuki but takes a 180 when you sudden began developing feelings for the crooked angel during the confrontation – him reciprocating the feelings. Though relationships between a worker of God and a demon was the greatest sin, and faced consequences to those who are caught. ~ Having to sneak around and hide your relationship with the fallen angel how would an archangel keep her status under God while simultaneously keeping an accursed romantic affair.(sorry i suck at summaries lmao)”

my thoughts: you know, i just have a craving to live a life in greekish-mythologyish and reading lore of olympus makes it partly redeemed. but this takes the cake. LIKE?! oh my fucking god! absoluetely love and im still reading it cause im slow asf but its so good so far! and she doesnt at all, the summaries are what got me interested!!

completed: neh~

I’m Broken Too (Shigaraki x Reader x Dabi) by Kikyo851 (quotev; kikyo851/tumblr; @heroes-among-us-all)

au: canon

summary: “What’s a girl to do when she can’t quite make it as a hero? Become a villain, of course.”

my thoughts: okay so youre thinking, “that summary is short asf” but godtdamn the book is motherfucking good dawg. lieke,,, this absolutely fueled my villain spark way back whenever. (you can gladly thank this book and all the dabi fics from @lord-explosion-baku, who also has a book called “thorns” which is also on ao3. i havent read it because im not into that au but it has many good reviews!!)

completed: neh~

Million Reasons by Chub_Rye (other socials; not listed)

au: future canon (?)

summary: “This is not a happy story, you really wished it was but how can it be when your marriage is falling apart. You truly love your husband, the thing is…he doesn’t seem to feel the same anymore ((Trigger warning: this is a very emotional heavy story, you have been warned.)) Inspiration: Million Reasons by Lady Gaga”

my thoughts: 

*if i had the time i would edit to: “im fucking sobbing fam”* because this shit hurtedt. like, HURTEDT. this book, this very book is the reason why fucking katsuki fucking bakugo slapped down the damn rankings on my list. didnt fucking like him for like two weeks, just thinking about him made me mad as FUCK. but its written so good i cant be mad?! i… okay moving on before i start crying and listing reasons why katsuki needs to CHOKE in this damn book. also if you dislike deku then this story will change. you.

completed: neh~

Muted by HecateSG (other socials; not listed)

au: canon

summary: “A collection of short one-shot stories where the reader has lost the ability to speak due to an incident that ranges from accident, to intentional, which now leaves you in the care of at least one of this dashing and intrepid cast of characters. There will be a variety of scenario’s explored and kinks touched upon for all you curious depraved little ones. ~ The only thing these all have in common is that the Reader will remain almost exclusively quiet the entire time ~ The tags will be updated as more chapters are released.”

my thoughts: this is a one-shot book (no cohesive storyline unless chosen) but its so good. so good. i thought shigaraki, dabi and all might in one book was interesting but never the less, super good! i never was interested in the mute concept but its written good? (but thinking about it all the other mute!reader fics are good but they wont nsfw so it didnt interest me-) furthermore, its so good. so pure. so hot. 11/10 would recommend.

completed: neh~

Nightclub AU by sour_pink29 (tumblr; @heros-amoung-us)

au: well… nightclub

summary: “U.A. is the most prestigious and well known nightclub in the world. It takes a high price and a creditable reputation to attend the club, but only because it makes your wildest dreams and fantasies come true. The workers are the best of the best: the 1A class; with the sexiest dancers, flirtatious waitresses and waiters, master bartenders, and high class security. It’s truly no wonder why the rich and famous travel from all corners of the world to have one special night at U.A. ~ As a waitress at the club, you were used to dealing with rich, handsome, high maintenance bachelors. But when 6 mysterious men enter the club and your life, you feel something different spark between you and them as they turn your life on it’s head. For better or for worse… ~ AU where you and the 1A class (and some other characters) are workers at the club. Kaminari, Kirishima, Katsuki, Shoto, Tetsu, Izuku, and Sero are all competing for your attention. ~ WILL INCLUDE NSFW IN SOME CHAPTERS ;)”

my thoughts: THGIS BOOK FUCKIN SLAPS. HANDS DOWN WOULD TOOT MY ASS UP FOR THIS! (thought about dropping my studies and just fucking doing stripper work-) like wow… its a good book and the writer was prob one of the first wirters i followed on here?! (thats if tumblr didnt fucking remove my damn following like it usually does. ._.) enough about that, its really good. i think about it often.

completed: neh~

Plus Ultra! One-shots and Requests by MistressPikachu (FinalVolition) [tumblr; @adelheidvonschicksal]

au: varies

summary: “A place to store all my smaller drabbles for BNHA. NSFW and SFW requests CLOSED!”

my thoughts: um so she write for *everything* but not like everything, everything. so sometimes it be like a red flag so make sure you are reading it carefully on the story you click on! personally, since theyre a good asf writer i usually dip my toe in all of them but sometimes i just cant but the ones i can, i read over and over and over again. worth a million reads tbh. 12/10 would recommend if youre nasty like that (and i KNOW you guys are).

completed: neh~

slutty one shots by cherrykwrites (tumblr; @cherrykwrites)

au: varies

summary: “Collection of some slutty short scenarios. Mostly Bakugo, could include other characters too. ~ Everything will be NSFW in this collection. ~ Themes like non con, underage, alcohol, bdsm, daddy kinks, ect could occur in these writings. ~ These are purely works of fiction and do not reflect reality, I do NOT condone any of the immoral actions written in these.”

my thoughts: so of course i could not leave the og, the real home slice, cherry-mother-k-fuckin-writes- CAN WE CLAP FOR THE QUEEN? so essentially, her shit is good asf. you should read it cause its good asf. shes not around that much but she def is really good! (also has my thinking about writing some tattoo artist!bakugo these days, or even a series for my husbandos…). never thought about sandwhiched between kirishima and bakugo until i came across her fics~

completed: neh~

Euphoria - NSFW Series by NekokoaFanfiction (tumblr; @nekokoafanfictions)

au: varies

summary: “Just a bunch of BNHA characters involved in several different kinks with you. ~ Summary of first chapter: ~ “Katsuki…”That mewl you made was hard to hear but somehow it reached Midoriya’s ears and he gulped as he saw said man standing up from the ground in front of you. A smirk as wide as it can be with his tongue brushing the corners of his mouth as if he just finished eating the best meal of his life.————————- Basically, Midoriya is in for a emotional ride lol”

my thoughts: they are such a good writer. another one-shots book but they will appear once again on the list but this book is just beautiful. and im a perv. so. have fun.

comepleted: neh~

⚠️okay so this is a series of fics from one writer, but instead of making a shit ton on the list (because if this isnt long already) its by the user QuillMind (tumblr; @quillmind) here are some of my faves:⚠️

Incendiary ~ a/b/o, “Mating season has come yet again. Bakugou has even more trouble controlling it than in previous years… and it’s all your fault.”

Mating Hunt ~ a/b/o, “You and Bakugou have been together for some time. Though you both know you only want each other, your bond won’t truly be permanent and known to all until he claims you during mating season. And as impatient as Bakugou is, as an Alpha, he loves a good chase. You decide to give him one.”

Story Time - A Reader x BNHA Multific by WhenSarahSmiles (tumblr; @makethiscanon)

au: fairytale/storybook/canon-ish

summary: “Whilst fighting a powerful villain, you find yourself sucked into the world their quirk created with no memories of your old life. Yet, the men you meet along the way have a familiar feel to them. Perhaps they can help you unlock your memories? ~ A Hero Academia/Fairy Tale mash up, there’s plenty of chaos to follow even if you think you know the classic stories well. ~ [Warning: Explicit Content from chapter 3 onwards] ~ [I will warn you which chapter features the non-con]] ~ “

-> Story one: Little Red Riding Hood (Katsuki Bakugou x Reader)-> Story two: The Little Mermaid (Shouto Todoroki x Reader)-> Story three: Jack and the Beanstalk (Eijirou Kirishima x Reader)-> Story four: The Three Little Pigs (Denki Kaminari x Reader)-> Story five: Sleeping Beauty (Shouto Todoroki x Reader x Katsuki Bakugou)-> Story six: Snow White and the Seven Dwarves (Midoriya, Tokoyami, Sero, Monoma, Ojiro, Shinsou x Reader)

my thoughts: bitch i have no thoughts. i only have THOTS. this is a masterpiece, like ive been lacking, the one im on rn is the kirishima one and it worth the read, and i bet the ones after that have been just as amazing! amazing work 11/10 would recommend.

completed: neh~

Wolves Among Us (Mini Series) by NekokoaFanfiction (tumblr; @nekokoafanfictions)

au: fantasy

summary: “Something about watching him lick your chilled skin was stirring something within you. Your legs started to shiver, but not of the cold that surrounded your slightly exposed body but of a feeling blossoming in the inner regions of your lower stomach. You were getting lost in the rhythm of his pants, wandering in the hazy want of his intense eyes. Your breath began to tremble, and you tried to squeeze your legs together to withstand the odd sensation growing, but he held your leg still and showed no signs of letting go. You were suddenly aware of his hand on your lower thigh, and you noticed that it was the first time a man’s hand had touched there. ~ You were a flower that had yet to bloom in the late of spring. Pure, untouched and suddenly, bombarded with desires. You never shivered in the way a man could make you, and curiosity—maybe naivety, was keeping you from your fear of the beast. —————– Basically, you fall in love with a rude wolf man. ~ Mini series!! Werewolf!Bakugo x Human!Reader, Fantasy AU ~ Inspired by The Company of Wolves by Angela Carter”

my thoughts: i ride this books ASS for updates. my favourite bakugo au’s are fantasy (wit da dragoons) and were!katsuki (haluween). i fucking love it, i love their works. theyre busy with school (like i should be but scholars are all different-) trust me its so good. it has that good spice that make fill my heart with sexy uwuwuwuwuwuwuwus. love it.

completed: neh~

Katsuki Bakugo Scenario Collection by Hvalross (tumblr; @cutesuki–bakugou)

au: varies

summary: “A collection of oneshots and scenarios I’ve done for Bakugou, both personal works and requests on my blog Cutesuki-Bakugou. ~ Please note that the rating of each story will be in the notes of the chapter. Stories range from TEEN to EXPLICIT.”

my thoughts: oh my god. i reread this one chap over and over and over and over and over and over- and over again. the stories range from cute to just good smut and its so good. so beautifully written. and i cant help but just appreciate it. love it sm. (also sorry if i tagged the wrong tumblr im confsued as to which one you use ahaha)

completed: neh~

Wish the World Away by hoshigalaxy (other socials; not listed)

au: canon

summary: “bakugou katsuki is the number one hero. but with this title comes a huge target on his back. sometimes it’s better to stay single when you’re a pro hero. there could be accidents. ~ but that’s three years in the past now and bakugou is slowly moving on from what’s happened. that is until he runs into his mysterious new neighbour and things get complicated again.”

my thoughts: ;-; this one hits different. almost like a million reasons type of different. i dont want to spoil it but godt damn man. there is so much to be uncovered but it really hasnt been updated. (cri) its a beautiful book tho. fingers crossed for when it updates next.

completed: neh :

Up in Smoke. (Soulmate AU) by Grapelimeade (tumblr; @gojirabbit)

au: well,, soulmate

summary: “Bakugou doesn’t want a fucking soulmate.”

my thoughts: may i say…it is such a stark contrast to Million Reasons. it is so fucking captivating i will not shit you. this book, is amazing. im just saying, that midoriya scene tho,, 👀 that kirishima friendship,, 💪🏽 its so good…? got me panting for the next chap (and no not like that weirdos but there is nsfw because when tf do you catch me reading a fic without nsfw…?) but i recommend. mc: million reasons tho me: up in smoke tho-

completed: neh~

Vermilion by Morgana_Ren (tumblr; @morgana-ren)

au: canon

summary: “Tomura Shigaraki had a goal. It started out simple enough. Kill All Might, and watch the society that revered heroes above all else crumble to dust alongside their idol. However, what originally starts off as a chance encounter with a UA student during the battle of USJ sends him reeling down the crooked path of obsession.”

my thoughts: its just…? my shigaraki thirst was sparked from this very story. it good, supplies my shifty hands needs and it suffices the boiling lust in my clit. wish we’d see more cause i love it already and it blends the story line well. love it. 11/10

completed: neh~

words hurt [Bakugo Katsuki x Reader] by QueenExplosionMurder (tumblr; @strawberryandspiceandchocolate)

au: canon

summary: “*more tags to be added* ~ when Bakugo Katsuki friendzones the reader, their friendship takes a nose dive off of the face of the earth and he doesn’t hear from her for a while. that is until she is suddenly thrown back into his life, quite literally actually…”

my thoughts: well you think i can go a post without tagging my president? youre fucking wrong. i have actually posted my own prev of her book which you can find here. i am just astonished at well the mood is (because tb when all i would talk about is mood) because mood is just good. it doesnt seem cliche to me. cant wait until the next update.

completed: neh~

You and Yamada by Jo_Rutherford_Lee (other socials; not listed)

au: varies

summary: “Just a few short Present Mic/Reader PWPs I needed to get out of my head.”

my thoughts:

i love this book. couldnt find the yamada book i was looking for but i would be lying if this doesnt revive my yamada love every once in awhile. (jk i found the book but this one is really cute and a quick read!!)

completed: yis

Singed Rose Petals: (Alpha) Dabi x (Omega) Reader by Smutsy (other socials; not listed)

au: a/b/o

summary: ““The villains were always ugly in books and movies. Necessarily so, it seemed. Because if they were attractive - if their looks matched their charm and their cunning - they wouldn’t only be dangerous. They would be irresistible.” - Nenia Campbell”

my thoughts: ohhhh because you guys thought that i’d go through a post without mentioning dabi? LOL so,, this book has brought many many many happy coochie tingles to me. i would murder to be dabi’s omega. and DAS on baby. never was really interested in a/b/o stuff till i read this. love it so much 11/10.

completed: yis

special mentions:

BNHA Brothel by orphan_account [multiple, unfinished]

Hero Killer’s Charge by VulcanCaptain [stain x reader, unfinished]

Mouth Moods by Koalolive (twitter; renlup) [present mic, unfinished]

and god please dont fucking roast me i had a hawks faze. Birb Office for Birbs by insanityrunsinthe_family

[sloven5905115]

Summer Time Chp. 2  Here Cums the Girls

Well as I was checking out the bank lines and waiting for Mark to return I reflected on just what had happened.I would have never imagined the feelings I had at that moment.I didnt know if I was gay or what but I couldnt deny that what me and Mark had done was probably the greatest thing I have ever done in my short life.As I sat there nursing my beer I relived the feeling of Marks cock in my mouth, hard yet velvety at the same time.And then the way Mark took me in the ass for the first time of my life.What ever happened next I knew that this would always be a time that I would remember for the rest of my life.Just as I was about to drift off to sleep I heard the unmistakable sound of Marks pickup, I got up to climb up the side of the river bank to help him carry the stuff down to the camp site.When I realized that Mark wasnt alone.He had brought his sister, Becky and her friend Karen.Now a little bit about the girls, both were 15 at this time and were basically glued at the hip, there was a lot of rumors going around about if the girls were lesbians.While both were about 52 , 53 with Karen being the taller by just the slightest amount.And since they were on the school track team they were about 115 lbs and rock solid physiques.Becky had a set of abs that most guys would love to have.Karen was black shoulder length hair with about large B cups with legs to die for, and Becky had strawberry hair that she kept fairly short and her breast were just a little bit larger than Karens.

Becky bounced out of the pickup and waved her arms at me shouting hi Jimmy,hows the fishing.I dont know why but I just hated being called Jimmy and Becky knew it but would say it all the time just to rub it in.So I gave her a hurt scowl look and she came up to me with that puppy dog look and kissed me on the cheek.Usually this is as far as it goes, it was becoming a private game between the two of us, but this time instead of saying there, there Jim it will be alrightshe surprised me by reaching around and grabbing my ass and whispering in my ear Mark told me everything.

I must have looked like I had be hit by a cattle prod at that news.I couldnt believe that Mark would have told anyone at all about what had happened earlier.For a minute I felt betrayed and hurt but, Becky leaned to my ear and said ‘not to worry stud Mark and I share every thing.At this she stepped back with a serious shit eating grin and I stood there looking like a dork, I was completely confused.She had never acted that way toward me, I used to be the neighbor hood geek now she was calling me stud.And what the hell was this share every thing shit.But before I could say anything Mark and Karen came up to us carrying some ice and more beer.

Well Jim did you catch any fish. asked Mark

I dont know about fish but if Jim doesnt close that mouth of his, hell sure as hell catch some flies. laughed Karen as they walked by.

Oh, by the way there is some food in the truck Jim why dont you get it for us. Mark said over his shoulder.

So, after I got the food and came down to the camp site I say Mark sitting next to Karen and Becky was on the other side of the fire and patted the ground next to her.Not being one to disappoint a lady I sat down next to Becky and she leaned on my shoulders.Now I know what most of you will think that the first thing I noticed was her tits or something like that, but, I just couldnt get passed how good this girl smelled.It wasnt overly perfumed or anything like that just a good clean smell.Well after a minute Becky looked up to me and said that this was the point when I was supposed to put my arm around her and hold her.I smiled down at her and held her.Even though me and Mark had just fucked holding Becky was just something that I knew I could get used to.Where Mark was hard teenage muscle Becky was firm but not too hard and her skin was so much softer.Well we sat there talking about school, summer and about anything else we could think of, and of course drinking beer.After a while Karen got up and grabbed Mark by the hand and led him off.

Now I wonder where those two are off to.I asked Becky.

She grabbed hold of my face and said to give us some privacy silly.At which she leaned forward and kissed me.I was a little shocked at first but, that lasted about a second and then I figured after what I had already done that to just go with the flow.So I reached around and held her and started to kiss her back.I guess in my eagerness I was to hard because the next thing I knew she pushed me back.whoa stud, when your kissing a girl you need to take your time.Just remember that ladies like to make love, guys like to fuck.So stud just take your time because we have all night.

I do have a question for you though.I said as I laid down next to her.

Whats that Jim

What did you mean when you said that you and Mark shared everything.

Well, lets just say that I havent been a very good girl.She said looking off into the distance.Im not sure why but all of a sudden Im kind of embarrassed by this.As she said that I sat up and looked at her with a confused look on my face and she reached up and grabbed my arm and said.Oh now Jim I dont mean you or this, its not you, its just , , , you see, , , well.Oh hell there isnt any easy way to say this so here it goes.Me and Mark have had sex together, it started one night we were kidding each other and he dared me to show him my pussy and I dared him to show me his cock.Well the next thing I know Im on my knees sucking him off and then he eats my pussy.Dont get me wrong he didnt rape me or anything it just kind of happened, but we have been doing it off and on since then.I even let him fuck me in the ass, good thing I was drunk that night or there is no way I would have done that, and I havent let him do it since.But there is one place he hasnt fucked me.

You mean your pussy is still cherry.I looked at her with disbelief, especially with everything that she had told me.

Yes it is, I know that this is going to sound silly but Ive had a crush on you for a long time.And I just knew that I wanted you to take my virginity.And when Mark fucked my ass that time I cried for a whole week knowing that I hadnt given you the chance.But you would hardly talk to me, so I thought that you didnt like me.After saying this she looked down and I knew she was about to start crying.

I lifted up her chin and gave her a pick on her forehead and told her Dont cry its partly my fault too.She looked at me with doubt and tears starting to form in the corner of her eyes.I thought that you didnt care for me and I was scared to ask you out. For fear that you would turn me down and make fun of me.

OH GOD, no Jim I wouldnt do that.I know that I have teased you in the past but that was child stuff and it will never happen again, I promise.Saying that she wrapped her arms around me and held on tight.After a moment I could hear her starting to quietly sob.I was so stupid to treat you that way, its all my fault.

As I was holding her close to me I said softly to her ear No its nobodies fault were just two young kids that didnt know what we were doing, but that is changed and now that we know how we feel toward each other things will be different.

Just hold me for now ok.

Sure anything that you want.So there we were two kids just holding each other after opening our hearts to each other.Now I know what your thinking what about what I had said to Mark, loving him and all that.At that time I wasnt really thinking of that, I figured that I would just have to sort that out later.After all Mark was probably fucking Karen right then at that moment.Then I felt Becky start to stir and rubbing her hand up and down my chest, I just laid back and enjoy the feeling then I felt her hand go for my waist band of my shorts.Reaching down I grabbed her hand and told her you dont have to do this to prove your feelings toward me.I dont want you to ever regret this moment.

She looked at me and it looked like she was about to cry again and I thought oh shit what did I say this time.Becky just looked at me and said that was the most beautiful thing you could say to me.I want to fuck you so much now you just dont know.She reached in my shorts and started to stroke my cock and said you know for being the cutest dork around you can say the smartest things.Smiling down at me she started to pull on my shorts so I help her out and took them off.Damn, not bad size and your young, I think with some care on my part it will grow some more.with that comment she leaned down and took my cock in her mouth.While Mark was able to take my cock completely in his mouth Becky was only able to take half before she started to gag and back off.But, what her mouth couldnt handle she stroked with her hand.So this is what making love feels like, I realized that what I thought was love with Mark was in reality just great sex between two guys.I looked down and watched her bob her head up and down on my cock and for a moment I could see a small tear running down her cheek but she wouldnt stop.I started to feel the sensation that told me I was about to cum so I put my hand on her head and told her, but she backed off and said no Jim I want this, I want all of it I never let Mark cum in my mouth but I want you everywhere.With that she returned to my cock and started to suck with more vigor.Then it hit me and I couldnt hold back anymore I arched my back and dug into the ground with my hands as I started to cum in Beckys mouth it must have been six or seven squirts and she tried to swallow it all but some came out of the corners of her mouth.I must have blacked out because the next thing I knew Becky was next to me with a look of contentment on her face.Welcome back to the living stud, you know Ive heard the other girls say how they like their boyfriends cum and now I know what they were talking about.

I gave her a big hug and told her well I guess its time for this gentleman to do his duty.with that I started to kiss my way down her neck and kissed her left nipple while I messaged her right breast.I kept nursing, for want of a better word, while stroking her body making a special effort to avoid her pussy area.I had read a story from Penthouse how that was supposed to drive a girl crazy and now I was going to find out if the guy knew what he was talking about. And so far it seemed like he did, because the more I suckled her breast and rubbed her body the more Becky started to squirm and beg me to touch her pussy.So finally I gave in and started to rub her pussy, at first I thought that she peed herself she was so wet.I kept working my way down kissing her everywhere, when I got to her belly button I put my tongue in and sucked.She jerked hard screaming how that wasnt fair to be making her feel like cumming and tickling her at the same time.But, I just smiled and kept on going, finally I got to her pussy.There was a muskiness to the smell but not bad I could get used to this, I thought.I ran my tongue up and down her slit and every once in awhile I would give her clit a suck.Then with outwarning my sweet petite Becky grabbed my hair on my head with the strength of a bull rider and clamped her legs around my head.For a minute I was wondering if she was going to let go but, then what a way to die LOL.Then all of a sudden she started to squirt her own juices in my mouth I tried to swallow but there was just too damn much fluid.

Finally she relaxed and I moved up and kissed her on her lips.Damn Jim where did you learn to do that, you been practicing on other girls.

NoI chuckled just a healthy dose of Penthouse Letters.

She cradled my head and stroked my hair and jokingly said Well thank God for pornography and maybe well have to write out own letter someday.But, first are you ready for the main event.

Are you sure.I mean I would love to but…..

Jimmy stop talking and get ready to make me your girlfriend, lover and best of all your woman.

You keep calling me that and Im going to have to spank you.

Promises, promises.she said laughing now lets get this done before I start thinking about it

Yes maam. with that I got between her legs and looked at her laying there.I moved up and placed my cock at her opening and started to move in when all of a sudden I hit something and she arched her back and put her hands on my chest.She was actually panting, I asked her if she was alright and if she wanted me stop.But she shock her head and said wait so I stayed in the same position and she said now.So I leaned into her.I could tell by her face that it was hurting her and was about to stop when all of a sudden I broke through.

Becky arched her back and screamed, OOOOOHHH GOD THAT HURTS.I was scared that I had done something wrong and started to pull out when she grabbed me and shouted for me to stop moving and just let her get used to it.So that is what we did and after a while I started to move in and out of her and she said that it was ok, and that it was actually starting to feel better by the minute.So I started to work myself in and out of her, her pussy felt so good around my cock that I never wanted out.I was thinking then that what I did with was Mark was nice but this was even better.So I kept up and I even started to pick up speed.Becky started to grind her pussy on my cock and telling me how good my cock felt in her pussy.Then all to soon that feeling came over me and I knew I was about to cum when I said I should pull out and not cum inside her, Becky wrapped her legs around me and said No you dont I want your cum inside me, dont you dare pull out Jim, if you do Ill never forgive you.So stop thinking and just fuck the shit out of me. Ooh God that feels better and better.Dont stop fucking me Im going to cu……with that she stiffened and I felt her juices on my cock and that sent me over the edge and I shot my load in her pussy.There we were two teenagers whose bodies were locked in a missionary position our bodies spasmingwith the pleasure of youth.Finally the feelings subsided and we parted and laid side be side and just sat there enjoying the afterglow of great sex.

It was only a couple of minutes when I heard noises and looked up and I saw Mark and Karen walking toward us.The first thing I noticed was that they were both naked and I could see cum running down Karens leg look Mark I think theyre finally doneKaren said with a smile on her face.

Yea they sure did take their time, for a minute I thought I was going to have to fuck you again.Mark joked while he had a finger in Karens ass.

Now stud that wouldnt be so bad would it.Besides the way she was screaming I wont be surprised if the sheriff doesnt show up.Hey Becky how about you let me have a go at Jim and see how he is. Karen asked Becky.

I dont think so Karen, at least not for awhile but right now I want to keep him all to myself and that means you big brother.You keep your hands off of him.Becky said while we were still laying on the ground with me on my back and her with her right arm and right leg draped over me.I do know one thing and that is I need to cool off.So Jim get your but up and lets jump into the river and cool off for awhile.

With that she stood up and grabbed my hand and led me off to the river.While heading to the water I heard Mark tell Karen What did I tell you

Youre right Mark they do look like a cute couple.But, you know what Im going to miss most.

Whats that Karen.

That sweet pussy of your sisters.

I looked at Becky and she just gave me that impish smile of hers and said Ill tell you laterI cant wait for that story

https://curvage.org/forum/index.php?/forums/topic/55079-new-fan-of-curvy/

https://forum.codeigniter.com/thread-79016.html

https://www.immihelp.com/forum/usa-visitors-visa/758499-reenter-after-extended-stay

http://forum.canardpc.com/threads/130465-%D1%81hoix-carte-mere?p=13356373

https://www.planete-citroen.com/forum/showthread.php?208758-Leve-vitre

https://forum.primefaces.org/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=66424

https://community.apachefriends.org/f/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=80685

https://www.ramforumz.com/threads/4wd-serv-light.282132

https://forum.outerspace.com.br/index.php?threads/recomenda%C3%A7%C3%B5es-de-hardware.240712/page-812#post-18831521

https://www.nissanclub.com/threads/2015-altima-acceleration.521820/

[b0ttl3d-up-st4rs]

Well I'm gonna do what I do best and self reflect to an insane amount. This is probably gonna be a long post so buckle up.

To be honest my behavior for nearly the past year now is concerning to say the least. There's this little voice in my head that just desperately wants to get more and more hurt, more and more traumatized. Why is that? At first glance the negative approach could be to say its some sort of masochistic behavior and any negative repercussions as a result of this behavior is deserved, but I don't really think thats the case.

Self sabotage is a characteristic that can be exhibited in many mentally ill people and I am no exception. I think this behavior, of seeking to be hurt by grown men on the internet is partially self sabotage.

And I remember when I first started this shit show, I just wanted attention. Sounds mean to say, but craving attention is something the human soul desperately wants. And I was starting to feel some sense of self beauty but I didn't feel as though anyone around me was appreciating it so I tried to get attention from grown men because being showered in compliments and attention felt so good when my whole life I've never gotten any of that.

I think there's more too it, though. Looking back my whole life it's almost as if I've wanted to get hurt. In books I liked to sit around with the pain the characters felt. And its almost like I wanted to get traumatized. I've heard that people with trauma that they don't acknowledge is trauma or think its bad enough to be traumatizing seek put worse forms of trauma, in order to feel that pain is valid. And I think that's part of my issue too.

I do have unaddressed and repressed childhood trauma. I was given unrestricted internet at a young age and was exposed to the horrors of the internet. Nothing like straight up porn, but a lot of suggestive content. And in general being exposed to that caused me a lot of catholic guilt as I was raised catholic. I remember feeling like knowing these things were my fault. Many days I felt so guilty that I would pray to god to let me not wake up in the morning.

As a child I also questioned my religion a lot, which i think was traumatic in itself. Religion is a big thing. And as a kid I had a big issue knowing reality from fiction. Heck I still do. I remember as a kid my friend telling me that we were all demigods and one day we were going to run away to camp half blood. That the percy jackson books were real. It sounds stupid now, but I processed that as real and it was so stressful for me.

And I remember being 12 coming out as trans and as a part of the lgbtq community to my parents. They didnt react well. They said I was confused. My mom said I was both too young and too old to know. I fought a lot with my mom. And in general have a lot of unhappy memories from then. I was outed multiple times in my life.

My relationship with my parents still isnt good. My mom has a tendency to be toxic. I hate that I have to stay in the closet around my family its so painful. Like a month ago I mentioned the lgbtq community for the first time in years, asking my mom her opinions on it and if it changed since 2017, and it turned into her yelling at me and making herself a victim. It really hurt. I forgot how much it hurt.

I don't really have much of a relationship with my dad. We barely talk. Hes very emotionally distant. When I'm at my dad's house I sort of fend for myself. Its the exact opposite at my moms house. She's overbearing and never leaves you alone. It's like going between to extremes.

And honestly I can't wait to move out. My mom and I have arguments a lot. But hey at least I have some relationship with her, I don't really have a relationship with my dad.

I remember one time this year, I was during the end of a school semester. I needed to catch up on work because after talking to my abuser for like 5 months and then unlocking him I was left in shambles and fell into a really bad depression to where my motivation for school just disapeared. Im still dealing with that tbh. Anyways I had to go to a online meeting to choose my classes and I didn't get to choose the classes I thought I would be able to, and that made me really upset. But after the meeting I had to go to do am act of kindness (I chose picking up litter at a graveyard cause i like graveyards) for my school project but I was still distraught. If I was given some time to myself I probably wouldve been able to go without issue, but my mom wanted to go immediately. We argued. And when I got there I refused to leave the car because I felt so much like shit. We argued more. It was the worst argument I ever had. She even swore at me. Which she's never done before. And she ended up playing victim again. She does that a lot I guess. And doesn't really listen to my feelings. Whenever I try to communicate about my feelings with her it turns into an argument and she makes it about herself. So yeah our relationship isn't the greatest. And I think having mommy and daddy issues is a trauma in itself. Ppl deserve to have happy healthy supportive families.

Oh right and another trauma I completely forgot (funny how that happens) is when I was 14 and admitted to a mental hospital because I tried to off myself. It was so surreal and they forced me to learn how to make eye contact with people cause apparently thats "how they know im doing ok". Which is kinda fucked considering the fact I recently realized I might be autistic. And eye contact is literally so painful for me. It especially was back then. Anyways the place itself wasnt too bad but the feeling of being trapped overall sucks and being disconnected from the rest of the world isnt fun either. Also I dissociate all the time but I especially dissociated hard thru the whole experience. And sort of made myself into the perfect patient, repeating all their bs and literally lying to myself to convince myself that I was ok so they would let me go. So that was kind of weird.

Anyways I know I have it better than others. And honestly sometimes it's hard to tell what exactly was traumatic in my childhood. I probably forgot and repressed other parts of it too and am forgetting things. But needless to say these unaddressed traumas didn't help my mental state. And i do think that's a big part of the voice in my head begging me to just get hurt more.

Overall my mental state is fucked, It's been really hard for me not to be taken advantage of by another internet pedo. Heck the only reason that isn't happening rn is because no ones dmed me yet. Also I unblocked my old abuser and we are talking again now so thats fun. It definitely doesnt help the cognitive dissonance in my brain of him being actually a nice and supportive dude. I think thats also a part of me wanting to get more traumatized. Since my abuser is a nice person that should counteract all the fucked up sexual things he said to me in the past right? I mean others have it worse, had worse abusers that were actively cruel. That's part of the bitch in my subconscious brain talking. It sucks tbh.

Anyways yeah I probably need therapy but I don't feel comfortable talking about this to my current counselor and honestly its really hard to say out loud. I can talk forever about it by writing it down but the moment I speak words from my dumbass mouth I break down in tears and can't do it. Plus idk, I'm scared if I say anything she'll have to tell my parents and that my phone might be taken away or I'll have less privacy and for a closeted queer where my only current life line is the internet and my online friends: that is a terrifying idea. Idk. I'm fucked basically.

[carternate]

i really dont understand my own feelings

and im fucking terrified of myself.

i refuse to say im okay anymore. my head isnt okay

what im feeling isnt fucking normal

and i take it out on my girlfriend but in the same respect im terrified of telling her shit because i will be exposed. i trust her i want her and i love her more than anything. but i dont know how to explain my emotions anymore. i never did actually. im a fucking mess in general. i hate that i feel stuck in a prison of my own body. its not the dumb ass transgender feeling

its a literal feeling of a cage.

i hate the people in my past. i hate that they still have an impact

i hate that i cant control myself like i used to be able to and that i cant even take my medication because i tell myself im too tough for it lmao. i literally was so close to ending my life, but in an instant this time. not some pussy shit where i begged for help and then it was possible for someone to save me

i almost really just ended it. ended it because i didnt find value in it.

i dont feel good enough and everything seems wrong

but i want to be okay and be good and make it to heaven. i used to have a passion

i used to love god with all my heart but i cant even understand it anymore

its noones fault but my own

and that hurts even more

i cant even try to blame it on another its on me this time

ive lost control

i cant even think long enough to listen in my hour long class.

i thought i was broken before because of a family that degraded me

but whatever the fuck i feel now feels eighty times worse

but i keep it internal and i cant keep it in anymore

im going to fucking explode

im falling apart completely

and im going insane

and i dont feel that i belong here

i literally will sit in my car and think of scenarios

but when i actually start to FEEL its absolutely ridiculous and insane

and SO much.

i try to bring positivity and help anna

and i try to be sure that sentences like this dont happen

but flashbacks hit me hard

the hospital, that week. that first week was insane.

its fucked to say

but i felt like i belonged there. i felt like that could be my home. from the daily vitals,to the little kid that cried in the cornwr, to the creepy ass schizophrenic girl that was my roommate, to jenna, to my freak outs.

i was crazy. but i got to take it out and do it and have people who understood it and tried to help.

geneva ohio. is not a place where i can be okay and myself authentically

i cant even be myself at my fucking work place.

nobody understands shit other than the kids that were there

during our group sessions and even during school i felt like it was okay.

there is just a hole in my head that i can not find anything to fill

im curious about everything and i hve no idea what about

i have questions

so fucking many

and noone wants to hear them

i hate that i cant concentrate

i hate that when i tell my dad im not okay i cant even look him in the eye because all i can picture is coming out of the ambulance and seeing my mom and dad looking at me screaming what hppened

and i have never felt like that in my life.

i cant let go of that. i cant let go of the visual of mallory laying at the edge of my bed before i got sent away to laurelwood looking at me like “fuck dude. you really tried.” she looked sorry for me, but not the kind that people like want. not the kind of compassion

but the scared kind. she looked scared of me. nothing has been the same aince.i want to drown iut my thoughts

and my stupid fucking stutter

and i want to lay in annas arms and cry everything out

but i also want to fucking beat the shit out of someone

and thats not me. im not violent. but i want to like bEAT THE SHIT out of someone. anyone at this point. but whatever

i dont understand how things that are so fucking simple to other people are like fucking complete brain aches for me.

i cant go anywhere alone because i am scared of being physically alone but mentally ive never been more lonely and that scares me.

the story never ends i guess.

i hate how my mind can be spinning in circles and people that say they are there can be right next to me complaining and have no idea i want to jab a knife into my body lol

but then all i would be is a coward if i just ended it all. it would technically be the easy way out and i dont want to be that person. thinking about death doesnt really even scare me anymore, and that thought scares me more than death itself.

in a perfect world i guess everything would be fine

and i would be happy

and never necessarily need to think about things that hurt me or have those little bullets shot at my head with every turn i take.

but thats not reality, and realizing that alone needs

to be a priority that i take.

i probably wont ever live a life without triggers, depression, or anxiety.

and that fucking sucks.

especially because i know that people fake their mental illness just for the attention and they dont have to live with something that prevents them from doing everyday activities or being terrified of little shit

but in my opinion that attention people seek from illness or anything in general is the worst part about it. i hate when people find out about the hospital.

i get embarrassed regardless of how many times people will tell me its okay

like sure its okay. but its not normal. going to a mental institution shouldnt be something everyone does

or everyone knows someone who went. thats just fucked. and i hate that im someone that people will be like “oh emily went to one” or the questions i will get from people are absolutely morbid and NOT their business but i feel obligated to talk about it when people ask. its a fucked up world dude. and sometimes im really fucking sick of living in it.

i just want to be okay again, even if its for a second. just a second of peace and a second of understanding. a fucking break would be nice?

a vacation away with anna and my kitty? if i could get that right now my entire heart would be full. i need two weeks to mentally get myself okay again. but lucky for me that’s not possible, and some may say “welcome to the adult world” and that is such a fucking understatement.

this is never going to be over

and im always going to not be afraid of death and im always going to not know shit about myself and im always not going to treat anyone right and i cant fucking even breathe when im walking yet i still have to work daily. and im so sick of it from beginning to end. and i want my story to fucking end already.

God if you can see this by some small celestial chance you actually give a shit about Earth and its inhabitants fucking help me.

[budugaapologist]

when you are reading this rant take full offense its 2am here and im mad as hell

fair warning this post is long as fuck and has several arguments pertaining to specific peeves i need to rant about before i go crazy. if you're not interested just keep scrolling it's not hard it's literally the core of social media navigation

you know what? ima say it.

black flag is the best ac game and deserves more recognition than just pirate drinking jokes because:

nearly every named character (sorry burgess and cockram) has development and personalities. cant say that for that many others in other games.

not too much fucking shit to do in it (unlike uhhhhhhhh every fucking other game in the franchise. stop it. i dont need 500 treasure chests in arno's game he already has an excellent revenue with the cafe. i dont need a ton of side quests. i dont need 30+ chests per london burough. i dont need a million question marks on my map. i dont need all of egypt or greece to be littered with shit to do. fuck this.).

unlocking shit is so much easier. edward knows where every treasure chest is and doesnt pay for treasure maps. and literally unlocking shit is so much easier.

base is slept on. its fucking cool. its fucking fun. its fucking useful as shit. its fucking pretty as all hell. fuck you.

good story, fun story, great dlc, relatable story (unless youre some bootlicking cowardly rich cunt) emotional story but not depressing (unity im looking at your ending. origins stop killing children.), satisfying end.

i can do the combat with one hand. you know what that means? i can eat and drink without pausing. i can reply to text messages without pausing. i can pet my dogs and cats while playing.

main character actually has changed by the end of the game a vast amount. motherfucker, edward changed more in his antó mission than ezio did in his trilogy.

if you dont complete all objectives you still have a passing score on the mission. do you know what its like to be raised to only get good grades on stuff and see yourself getting a 60% on a thing thats supposed to be a pass time just because you forgot something.

the naval combat isnt hard you just need practice. also i know the hunter ship sucks in the first mission you encounter but literally drop your sails but hold the wheel. once its in view let go. swim to it. take out the crew. swim back. bada bing bada boom go oneshot the crew. incredible, you're safe now.

legendary ship battles are really fucking cool and my mom doesnt yell at me for killing a giant beast for next to nothing.

the sea shanties and tavern songs slap.

farm animal petting simulator. not forced to kill dogs (ac3, odyssey).

obviously its good if the other games are just gonna copy paste it.

ed's tattoos are sick.

edward is literally the first canon bisexual. he literally says so in game. he literally fucking flirts with blackbeard. he literally was a pirate. why the fuck do you think birate is such an accurate pun.

diving outfit.

thicc.

the female characters dont have titties all over the place. even anne's boobs arent that big, which is good considering she is underage. the same cannot be said for many of the women in ezio's games.

guess who has a solid, interesting, and realistic personality. not kassandra or alexios thats for sure.

he is NOT moved by man pain (ezio, connor, bayek) to carry out his missions. he didn't want to be poor, he wanted to be able to provide for his family. he is just carrying out his dream to sail a ship. when he starts being "good", he is doing it out of guilt and shame on his past self (what, self reflection? someone, teach jacob this term), not because "wahh my girlfriend/mom/child/family died :'(", he wanted to make it up to his lost friends by making them proud and doing what they wished he had done. his regrets are in not being a better friend while mary was alive, not seeking out her killers (guards at fort). thatch's death crushed him, but he didn't thrust his anger on seeking revenge. and the characters that did die? they had personalities and development and were interesting and memorable. i cant tell you shit about cristina.

he is very respecting of women, especially for a white guy from the 1600s. he, as a teenager (under 17 i believe), attempted to save a woman he did not know and had no intentions of wooing (hey um ezio? you literally only were able to save cristina from being raped because you stalked her because you thought she was attractive. like thanks for saving her but uhh am i the only one that finds that creepy?) even though the odds of winning against three older men were stacked against him and he knew they could (and almost did) beat him to death. fuck if caroline wasnt there he would've been killed.

the modern day stuff is an excellent way to separate intense scenes and the little mini hacking games are fun puzzles. oh boohoo desmond isn't there? yes he was, half the things you hack literally give you desmond content.

rebecca's outfit fucking slaps.

from experience, its fun to play even if you dont know shit about the other ac games. pirates are cool and the story is easy to follow, just be prepared to find some of the other endings big letdowns or lots of the other games' missions boring.

is that fanservice that goes both ways but doesnt oversexualize any gender? why yes, it is!

stop reducing black flag to alcoholism jokes like yall constantly fucking do, it has so many other talking points and if you wanna make fun of something maybe choose something that isnt addiction. literally i make fun of edward constantly without pointing out his alcoholism it isnt that hard. if you're gonna make fun of edward for drinking rum when water in the 1700s often wasnt safe and making fun of him when he was depressed (he has multiple other intended self harming behaviors shown in game so no, he wasnt just drinking because its fun), why don't i see the same "wHy is aLL tHe WiNE gONe?" posts for arno? he was an alcoholic too. in fact arno and edward have a lot of the same forms of depression but oh, arno's a more serious character personality wise and isn't a pirate so his grieving isn't as funny.

and like, there are plenty of other things to make fun of with edward that might not make light of alcoholism because no, edward's drinking in the main story was not written to be a joke. here, a list of things i regularly make fun of him for:

this highwaisted man's got feminine hips

there is no reason for him to be that thicc

his bangs are a mess

his hair???? glows???? okay rapunzel.

his tatts that are just lines

actually you know what his tatts in general what do they mean ubisoft what even language are the words on his body in

how this whore opens the bottled messages on the beach. "ah yes, let me put this mysterious item in my mouth. i have no idea where its been. i could very well open it to read a note that says "i pissed on this""

"woman i just met... must respect her.. man i just met... im either going to give you a death threat, tease you, or flirt... sometimes multiple choices will be done......"

i mean he had the full right to be a bastard to walpole on the beach since he did try to be friendly but walpole was being to bitchy and needy. and like them being stranded wasnt edward's fault but walpole was still gonna make him build a ship and there is no reason for edward to trust walpole since after they get to havana he can easily just be like "thats a pirate, hang him." but like. the way he just immediately decides to steal his identity. legend.

why does he just blindly follow older men's orders like that

he trims his beard to a very odd location. i know it isn't a flattering pose but like. look at the underside of his jaw.

"how many references to dog behavior can we put in one character"

phobia of sleeping in a bed

"you saved my life i am eternally grateful."

edward are you seriously arguing with your eight year old daughter about the difference between a boat and a ship

where are your tanlines

how did he not die of skin cancer first

edward probably doesnt have any body hair because ubisoft didnt want his legs to glow in the dark too

look at his marooned outfit. bitch what the fuck is on your shirt. and where are your hair ties.

his dramatic beauty guru smokey eyes

he held that sword by the blade in the single madman quest. wh

anyway, the long run of this is, if you're gonna reblog an edward post from me specifically to make fun of an overused joke, go fuck yourself.

[indigopurple]

Basically a review of OP episode 503 ig

Currently rewatching post-war arc (in the dub so I don't have any screenshots for u guys sry) and theres a few things id like to point out.

During a conversation Dadan once had with Garp, they were talking about Roger. Garp said that even if they were facing powerful enemies, he would never run away because he wouldnt dare leaving his comrads behind; it wasnt an option for him. Obviously we see this in Ace. But ALSO, isnt this what he did with Katakuri? It was a little different cuz of the setting mostly, but he separated himself from his crew to fight off katakuri, and lied to them about being okay so they didn't worry (he was already getting his ass kicked by then, so he just made that stupid smile and told them not to worry (or smth like that, I can remember the exact line) (that smile was so gross and fake cuz he fucking sucks at lying). Also he said roger destroyed a buncha soldiers cuz they mouthed off his men. That's what Ace tried to do but instead he died. :(

"The pain he went through just made him hold on tighter to the ones he loved" -Garp, about Roger. "Despite his flaws and his bad reputation, his crew still trusted him completely." -also Garp, about Roger. These both sound a lot like Luffy AND Ace.

When Dogra got home and told everyone about Sabo's ship being shit down and him dying (which we all know didnt happen, thank fuck), (by the way the absolutely lost looks on Ace's and Luffy's faces with the sudden silence hurt like a bitch), Luffy started crying and said "WE SHOULDNT'A LET HIM GO, IT'S ALL OUR FAULT". Which fucking says something about him (thinking of episodes 913-915 when he goes fucking berserk, but before that he learns that Kaido probably killed Tama and he says "I should've escorted them..!" (*ugly cries*)). Ace also reacted pretty similarly-- "Sabo...why didn't we go back into town and bring him back here?! We're so stupid!" And he gets mad and asks where he could find the bastard that killed him (obviously not getting a good answer since it was a fucking celestial dragon ugh). That is what Luffy does, in present time. He results to anger first, not sadness. Not sure when he learned to do that but I'm 99 percent sure it was from Ace. Also the blaming himself thing? High chance thats ALSO from Ace. Who else would teach him that self hating behaviour?!

Dadan pins Ace down to stop him from going after the Celestial Dragon to calm him down, telling him he cant do anything, he's not big or strong enough to do anything and he'll be killed as soon as he tries anything, especially since it was the whole country -the whole WORLD- that killed Sabo. He can't do anything. And then they tied him to a tree outside to let him cool off. Oh yeah then he also told luffy to stop crying like a little girl or else he'll- (and he didn't finish the sentence). ...Ok maybe thats why luffy started being more angry than sad.

This is where things get a little more :( . Ace reads the letter Sabo sent them before he died. As he reads, he walks to the end of the forest, to a cliff overlooking the ocean. And starts fucking bawling (btw the voice actor who had Ace's childhood part did not do a very good job, no where near as in character and real as Coleen Clickenberg did with all of Luffy's crying scenes. She was spot on.) ...do you see where im going with that? He isolated himself before letting himself feel sad. It was all rage and then calm beforehand. Y-you see where im going with that. Dont make me say it.

"How's Luffy doing, is he any better?" "Well...he hasnt been eating much, but he still eats twice as much as we do". Oh look, That's what happened after Ace died too. There's a behavioral pattern that hasnt gone away. Not sure why it wouldve tho.

Luffy is mopeing, lying on the ground in a similar setting ace was at when he cried. Hes thinking about some of the things Sabo said, like how theyre gonna sail the seas together, and he clenches his hands into tight, shaking fists. After Ace shows up and hits him, and talking abt some other stuff I don't feel like relaying, Luffy tightens his grip on the straw hat and tells ace, whimpering, he wants to get stronger (and stronger, and stronger, and stronger and stronger and....) And he wants to be the strongest in the world. "And then, I'll protect everyone. I won't lose anyone I care about". He gets stronger mainly to protect the people he loves. And then he asks ace to promise he won't die. To which he hits Luffy again and tells him he should be more worried about himself dying first. And then the famous line that hurts like a bitch- "I'm NEVER going to DIE!" And then this hopeful music comes on (fucking damnit funimation, u gotta do this? Really??) Also he says he wont die as long as he has a wussy little brother to protect. ...FUCK. Ok, the fist clenching is a thing he does all the fucking time, usually when he gets mad. This was different because he wasnt mad, he was sad. He clenched his fist because thinking about it hurt. Which, huh, sounds a lot like his whole episode after waking up from his 2 week coma on the polar tang. To try and stop the mental pain of those horrendous memories, he resulted to physically pain. He hurt himself. So, He clenches his fists in times like these to fight off the mental pain and the urge to cause himself physical pain. Guys, our boy is bad at emotions, help him. ....ok this paragraph is longer than I anticipated so ill dumb down the rest of it ig. Next part, him asking ace to promise he wont die. The music, the body language, the over change in mood- this comforts him. He stopped hiding his face and silently sobbing after ace said this. OH YEAH! didn't he tell jinbe not to die when they parted ways in Totto Land? And then, hes missing still in Wano and we see Luffy is worried....but convinced Jinbe will show up. Again, this comforts him. Hes nervous cuz someone KOFF KOFF ACE broke that promise once. But jinbe is his crew mate so he trusts him, thank god.

"-But whoever did it, they must be opposed to freedom." The whole freedom thing? That runs through Luffy's blood and spirit.His brothers fought for it, his dad is the man who strives to give everyone freedom basically, and Luffy himself has seen enough of the OPPOSITE of freedom to be so, so much more than just against it. Hence why he of course was so eager to free the slaves in Sabaody, the kids in punk hazard, the toys in dressrosa, the country of Wano from Kaido's tyrany. The apple doesnt fall far from the tree huh.

I dont think Luffy would remember his promise with Shanks if it werent for his brothers putting feul to his dream. It was a stupid bet at first; he just wanted to beat Shanks, right then. But after meeting Sabo and Ace, he found the opposite of freedom and human rights. And then he wanted, REALLY wanted, to become the free-est man in the world; the pirate king.

Last one i promise ok? This one is less connected to whats going on in the episode at this point, but something I noticed (its so obvious everyone has seen this ok) was when luffy cries, his posture is always open. He doesn't curl in on himself like many people would do (I know I would, lol). He doesnt hug himself, protect himself. He's just, opened up to whoever is watching, literally. This has a little more to do with something I haven't talked about much in this post yet; his self-destruction issues. I said he tried to hurt himself when he felt mental pain, which is definitely similar. But he cries and doesnt try to protect or comfort himself, like he doesn't have that programmed into his mind. Reminder that he only wants to live because of his dream, and if he doesnt have his dream, he wants to die. (Whoa.). Ok, so no self preservation mechanism at all rlly. Hes basically ride or die. So, when things hurt so much that he cries, he has no hope left. He just kinda...dies inside. So this was mildly different after sabo died. Yes we saw him just standing there, sobbing. But the next day he's still crying, and instead he's laying on the ground. I saw that and the voice in the back of my head told me he wanted to be a part of that lifeless dirt beneath him. Then, Ace walked over. And his words made him feel the hope that I told you about earlier, and he sat up into a sitting position. And HUGGED HIS LEGS TO HIS CHEST. There's some self preservation! Some hope! Some will to exist, to live! Something we saw none of as he sat in front of his brothers corpse, shutting down. He sat there, open to his enemies, incapable of protecting himself. Practically anyone couldve killed him right then and there. I think he mightve liked that, at that moment. Like thank god he has that stupidly good luck cuz if he didn't I swear someone couldve thrown and axe or FUCKING ANYTHING AT THAT MOMENT and hed be dead becuase he never physically or mentally prepared himself. On purpose.

Our poor boy needs some fucking attention and therapists. (Insert my rant post about how jinbe is on the crew primarily for anger management and therapy, not just being a helmsman.) Ugh, smh ugly cries

Aaaaand thats about the end of the episode. Theres so many little tics and peesonality traits that you notive thru this episode, and I only noticed them cuz im rewatching this part of the show for like the third time. I don't react as much as the first time of course but some things are definitely sadder after knowing what's going on and what will happen later on.

Moral of the story (post)? I think luffy is almost equally as alike -if not, more similar to roger as ace is. Also, high key genuinely think Luffy met like NO ONE but Garp before he met Shanks and his crew. What the fuck was his first like 5 years of being alive like? (He wantd to be a pirate cuz Garp didnt want that. Rebellious baby asshole. And then shanks made things worse, in a good way for luffy. And then ace and sabo made that worse thing worse for a good reason. Luffy lives...for those influences. And that is fucking it. Why.

Oh thanks tumblr for moving my picture to the bottom of the post u fucking idiot

[lenaluthorapologist]

Sometimes I watch Suoergirl and I think... gosh dont they know how much of a hypocrite they are making Kara? Like at every turn. Not just with Lena and what not... but like... the whole gun control episode? "I have lazer beams in my eyes! But god forbid humans be trusted with guns n shit!" The lying and then saying she doesnt like lies.... there is even stuff with Mon El, that, I hate to say he was right about. I often wonder if they know how much of an ass she looks like on a constant basis in her own show... and then, an episode like Tremors apears... and I find myself thinking that it's on purpose. And that they do indeed know how hypocritical supergirl really is. Dont take this the wrong way... I am not complaining... Kara is hypocritical because of how much she feels responsibility for everything. You cant tell people to not be violent without having a monopoly on that violence, and as a kryptonian, Kara holds that monopoly. She is 100% all powerful without any check. In this regard Lex was right. She is a god, she knows that and feels deep regret about it if she does something wrong or fails to save people. She is 100% aware of it... and it puts her into a paradox of morals. She CONTROLS all the weapons that can kill her. That looks EXTREMELY sinister. Even though we know it isnt.... but we have audience privilege... if this was real life, we as the public would believe that supergirl was unstoppable and that she was trying to suppress guns that could stop her. It would look like corruption to any reasonable person. We know Kara is being a hypocrite for good reasons, if the bad guys can have weapons that hurt her then she cant stop them as effectively. But it makes her look like a complete fuck. It makes her look like she truly does have a god complex... and to go on the same lines as Lena said, why shouldnt humans enable to protect themselves from humans and aliens alike that can literally kill them with a thought? What right does supergirl have to say humans cant have alien guns, kryptonite, or anything else like it? What right does supergirl have to have a monopoly on violence, and gets to decide who gets what weapon? When Kara doesnt allow humans to save themselves, when she makes it hard for them to protect themselves, it only makes her look more and more how Lex painted superman. A power hungry alien with a god complex. I think it would make the show a billion times better, if they acnowledged Supergirls short comings more, and quit ignoring them for half of the episodes it makes simply because its inconvienient. For the first time in months I have enjoyed a Supergirl episode... and it was because they acnowledged Kara as not being perfect, and godlike. And didnt create some dumb plot devise to make her 'right'. They let Lena lay it down, and Kara took it. One of the greatest things about Lena, is she is someone that cant be pushed around by Supergirl without true consequences. Because everything that has happened is all Kara's fault. No matter how you flip it. All due to her hypocrisy. It makes for great TV, and I wish there was more. They tried to do it with Mon el but it came off as cartoony... the actor sucked... with the whole "you're a goody goody" crap he spewed. Lena and Kara are the only relationship this show still gets consistantly right. And I'm 100% here for it. Kara is such a tragic hero... she is her own damn enemy... her and Lena are so much alike... but lena is a bit more self aware I think. Kara comes off as not realizing her well intentioned hypocrisy until its too late. I'm not sure if this complex dynamic of their characters is accidental, or on purpose... but if you read it as on purpose... a whole new story of Kara opens up. A girl who is so tragically hurt and traumatized she makes it her soul responsibility to make sure an entire planet is safe. And its God aweful, because it was her parents fault. You dont put an entire planets future on the back of a child, and they did that to her. The exact thing was done to Lena ... and they are so in their own pain they dont see when their own trains collide. Lena or Kara being right or wrong isnt exactly the story here. It's that they are both trying to do ways right and fucking up. The way this is written it gives me flashbacks to Once Upon A Time..... where they have this SUPER interesting natural story line that when they suppress it, it strangles the show to death, but when they let it flow naturally, it becomes this absolutely beautiful nuanced tale about hurt, love, and family.

[scgdoeswhat]

Lifetime #14: A Thin Line - Jake x Cris

Summary: It’s a thin line between love and hate. With 2,139 lifetimes on La Huerta, not every go-round was roses for Jake and Cris. Lifetimes AU.

Rating: NSFW

Words: 1303

Author’s Notes: I’ve had this idea of playing with the other 2,138 lifetimes on the island for a while! Initially a drabble prompted by @brightpinkpeppercorn for “A kiss to shut them up,” it turned into smut, because it’s me. Sorry this took forever and I hope you like it! Jake doesn’t belong to me (unfortunately), but the story does. No Beta used.

Sorry if the “Read More” link isn’t working. It’s Tumblr’s fault, not mine!

Tag List: @brightpinkpeppercorn @mysteli @indiacater @xo-endlessmayhem-xo @hellomynameisdeviblaire @sophie-summer @daniela2510 @endlessly-searching-for-you @princessstellaris @mechaspirit @choicesyouplayandmore @itsagoodluckkiss

Please let me know if you want to be tagged/removed on future fics. Thank you!

"Diego, I can't stand that pompous ass!" Cris fumed, pacing the length of the jungle suite. "He thinks he has all the answers and knows everything when it's very clear he knows jack shit!"

Diego sat on the couch, a nervous look on his face. He had never seen his best friend worked up as much as she was at this moment. His eyebrows shot up in surprise as his gaze darted behind Cris.

"You know, Princess, if you're going to wail on someone, you might want to make sure your door's closed next time," Jake leaned against the door jamb, a smirk on his lips. Anger laced his eyes as he glared at her.

With a roll of her eyes, she turned to face the pilot, placing a hand on her hip. “How many times do I have to tell you to stop calling me that?"

"Too many to count, Princess.”

She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, trying to keep her composure. It didn’t help. Reopening them, venomous daggers flew as she glowered at him. "Why don't you get out of my room and go fuck yourself."

Diego quickly made his way to the exit. "I’m – a – just going to... please don't kill each other!" He ran out of the room, closing the door behind him.

Jake marched over to Cris, until they faced each other with no space for a breath between them. "Go fuck myself?" He seethed.

Cris raised her chin defiantly. "You heard me. Go. Fuck. Yourself."

She tried to ignore the heat coming off him, instead willing herself to not back down from his hardened stare. From this proximity, she noticed the darkening of the blue in his eyes. Her tongue quickly darted out, moistening her dry lips.

The minute movement caught Jake's attention, his glare flicking from her eyes to her mouth and back again. When he met Cris' eyes once more, there was another emotion coursing through him: desire.

Her mouth parted slightly as she recognized it. Sure, she initially told Diego about her interest in Jake – if he wasn't such a royal ass. They stayed motionless for a moment more before her eyebrows raised in shock.

Jake grabbed both sides of her face as he leaned forward and kissed her hard. Her eyes fluttered closed as he deepened the kiss, sweeping his tongue inside, tangling with hers. She moaned into his mouth, grabbing handfuls of his black t-shirt, before pulling back. She looked at him, a dazed expression reflected on her face.

"Jake, what're you –”

He cut her off with a kiss even more passionate than before, his desire and longing poured into it. Her knees nearly buckled as she felt herself melt into his embrace. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she tangled her fingers in his shaggy hair, gently pulling it.

Jake groaned, the sound reverberating to her core. Cris pressed further onto him, roughly yanking his green bomber jacket down his arms before letting it drop. An animalistic passion awakened inside of him as he pulled off her red tank top; a growl left his throat when he saw she was not wearing a bra. He bent down, taking a breast in his mouth, raking his teeth over her nipple.

They stumbled onto the bed, their clothes disappearing along the way. She wrapped a leg around him, pulling his body on top of hers as he ravaged her mouth with his. The feeling of his calloused hands was driving her mad as he squeezed her breasts before taking a hardened bud between his lips. She arched into him as he found her soaking core, sinking his fingers past her lips.

"God, you’re so wet, Princess. You like this, don't you?" With a feral glint in his eye, he watched her closely, "You like it when I fuck you with my fingers."

Her legs spread further apart in response, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of an answer.

"If that's how you're going to play it, fine. But I'm gonna fuck you so hard you're going to be screaming my name.”

"Then put your money where your mouth is, Top Gun, "she challenged, her breath shallow with indignation still evident in her tone.

A cocky grin crossed his face as he ducked down between her thighs, throwing her legs over his strong shoulders. He licked his fingers before plunging two digits into her wet heat, followed by his unrelenting tongue on her clit.

Cris cried out in pleasure as he sucked on her nub, her hands tangling in his hair as she moved against his face. All thoughts were lost as his fingers curled in her, nearly bringing her to the brink.

He pulled away and started stroking his hard dick. "I don't think so, Princess. Not until I hear you say it."

"Goddammit, Jake,” she panted, a sheen of sweat covering her entire body. "I want you to fuck me."

The next thing she knew, he flipped her over, raising her hips until she was on all fours as he positioned himself behind her dripping sex. A sigh escaped her lips as she felt his head at her entrance, slowly sheathing himself in her.

Jake groaned as he slid in all the way. "Fucking hell, Cris. You're so Goddamn tight."

"You feel so good," she exhaled sharply, closing her eyes and relishing him inside her.

He steadied his breathing as he began to thrust in earnest, slapping her ass hard enough where he was sure his claim on her would be obvious when she wore her tiny bikini. The sounds of their bodies becoming one echoed throughout the room as he rammed into her, unforgiving in his pace as he fucked her raw.

Cris could barely contain the whimpers as he pounded her from behind, the sensation of his cock hitting her spot pushing her to the edge. She begged him to go faster and harder, not caring that she would have trouble walking the next day. With her climax nearing, she reached down to rub her clit, only for Jake to pin her arm to the bed as his other hand worked his magic on her bud.

His fingers slid over her button furiously, the added stimulation causing her pussy to clench around his cock as the orgasm racked her body.

"Jake! I'm coming!" She screamed out as he continued pumping, her walls squeezing his throbbing member.

His thrusts became sloppy as he could feel his balls tensing in anticipation. He pulled out of her heat as he finished himself with a grunt, his cum shooting all over her back.

He collapsed on the bed, inviting her to his nook, wrapping an arm around her as she laid her head on his chest. Silence reigned while they both caught their breath, minds blank from coming so hard. His hand gently traced lines up and down her arm, the gesture completely opposite of his rough demeanor not even minutes before.

She heard his heartbeat slow, returning to normal, while his breathing deepened as he relaxed in his haze. Not wanting to be the first one to speak, she fought the urge to say something. It was an internal battle she lost.

"Jake?" Her voice came out raspy, like someone who just had the best sex of their life.

"Hmmm?" His fingers continued their trail, leaving goosebumps in their wake.

"Where does this leave us now?" Her fingernails lightly scratched at his chest, the gesture making his muscles involuntarily flex.

Jake tipped her chin up, bringing her in for a slow, lazy kiss.

"I don't know, but I sure as hell enjoyed doing that a lot more than our usual fighting, Princess."

Cris hummed in agreement, mulling over his words. Suddenly, that damn nickname didn't sound so bad after all.