#this scene because the fact that we are currently living with him and his crave for domesticity is so GERRAGSGGEGEGHAGHHGGGHGG
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nnnneeev · 2 years ago
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Thinking about a scenario where Mc was just casually scanning the outside of cocytus hall when a cat suddenly popped out from the bushes. They tried luring it inside the hall, y'know for some company and entertainment while Solomon is out doing his business, using some leftover tuna and toys.
Mission complete. It's inside the hall now. Sniffing and examining the corners of the rooms. But not even a few minutes, it acts like it owns the place, knocking over vases and scratching the sofa. When Solomon came home, he was delighted by the sight of the new furry visitor.
"Ah, what's this little guy doing here?" He gently lifted the feline in the air.
"I found him in the yard. Can we keep him?" Mc pleaded.
He brought the cat to his face and rubbed it against his belly, "I don't mind. I was just thinking of how lonely you can get when I'm out and you have the whole place to yourself."
Mc giggled. Amused by how Solomon carries the cat with his arms like a baby and playing with it using a cat toy he conjured out of thin air.
"...You know, this kinda makes us feel like a complete family. There's you, me, and a cat," they point at the two.
He stopped for a moment and looked at Mc in the eye. There's a hint of fascination and delight in his eyes when they mentioned the word 'family'.
"...I like the sound of that."
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lemonandpie · 6 months ago
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Brudick for the ask meme!
001 | send me a ship and I will tell you:
when I started shipping it if I did:
Probably since forever? I shipped Batman and Robin before I even knew there were multiple Robins
my thoughts:
I've been binging Wormsin's fic the past couple days, which means I'm in a darker place when it comes to Brudick. (Also I've been craving some erotic thriller recently and that should just be Brudick: the genre. Can you imagine Bruce and Dick doing the piano scene in Stoker? Amazing).
Right now, I'm lamenting how rarely we see Bruce and Dick together anymore. They are the relationship that defines the Batverse, but almost three decades of Robin being treated like a bad word in DC cinema, I am missing Dick being Bruce's foil. His mirror. The one who took Batman's ideals and became something Batman himself could never be. But more than that, I'm just missing them right now.
What makes me happy about them:
I love mess :D
fr though I just have a thing for super messy father and son-esque mentor relationships where they're perfect together except one is definitely going to kill the other someday. They have a blowup and I wiggle my toes, but I think their sweetness gets me the most. I'm not big on the current era of comics, but I do love Bruce acknowledging Dick's worth and strength and I think Bruce needs to it more often
What makes me sad about them:
Their relationship is so heartbreakingly toxic sometimes, and not even in the fun way. Slade can almost kill Dick and it's hot, but if Dick was my friend and Bruce treated him that way (either as a partner or a parent or even just as a boss), I'd be begging him to leave. There's a real bitter undercurrent of Bruce being expected to do no wrong but also be dark and broody and grim that leans on Dick to always forgive, always come back, no matter what Bruce does to him. I think that just makes me sad about Bruce in general-- I am gagging for character development and DC steadfast refuses to give it to me.
things done in fanfic that annoys me:
I think a lot of fic makes Bruce either too good or too awful, until it's either boring or ooc. I just can't with a Bruce who is just the worst, or at least so deeply profoundly mediocre that he may as well be the worst. But also sunshine and rainbows seems too happy for them. It's a hard balance for the source materials, let alone the fic. And I include myself in this! I think Brudick is a genuinely difficult ship to write, because their dynamic is just difficult to nail down in general. Honestly I struggle to write them because of it, myself
things I look for in fanfic:
Passion. They may be the old married couple of the DCU, but Brudick are sexy. Any fic where they're a couple has to include the fact that they're an extremely taboo relationship but they're just so into each other it doesn't matter. Sizzling chemistry. Raw desire. The kind of mental anguish to keep Catholicism alive til the next millenia.
Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: 
Realistically, I think Bruce is going to end up with no one, but I'm down for some BatCat. Dick I ship with almost everyone
My happily ever after for them:
Dick being in a fucking live action film again
The DC world is so incredibly unpredictable that I think any ending I can imagine now would be completely incongruous to what would make sense five or ten years down the line. And honestly it's hard to imagine an ending for them. Right now, I would just like a run where Dick and Bruce have to lose their current status quo and have to genuinely understand and accept everything they are to each other. Yeah yeah, they hugged recently, but god I want them both to be stripped down to their darkest secrets and bared to each other; where Bruce can't make empty platitudes and Dick can't just forgive everything. Something where they get the choice to walk away and instead hold each other twice as hard. And then I want the hug
who is the big spoon/little spoon:
Bruce is the big spoon. Dick is the loose limbed jellyfish who can't stay still for five minutes and prefers to be face buried in Bruce's chest anyway
what is their favorite non-sexual activity:
Fighting Swinging through the city, grappling hooks not necessarily required.
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play-rough · 3 months ago
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(I read the new fic at 5am and wrote this a little past half 6 and the only reason this ask has any structure is because I took notes like an absolute lunatic- so please don’t grade me on my ask writing quality, I am a very tired strawb)
Playrough, I am currently recovering from a sickness of my own (a cold 😐) so the climactic release of this new fic feels like a wonderful gift from the universe. But it’s just convenient timing, and it’s from you, and by god was it worth the wait. I don’t know if you’ve got an update schedule in mind, but I’m am so stoked for more of this.
God Dazai was so pathetic- and I mean that in the best way; the wet cat energy dial was turned up to the absolute max. Christ if he wasn’t entitled to a bit of patheticness though, the baby was having a rough time.
Chuuya was also wonderful here- I like it when his thoughts to Dazai become so simplified to the point of primitivity. The “hurt baby, sad baby, must protect baby” bits always sound like it’s purely his alpha side thinking, and I LIKE that. I think the fact that he’s an alpha in this instead of a caregiver is really cool and I’m interested in how his alpha instincts and his relationship with Dazai could intersect. I was kinda picturing him going a bit feral when he was frantically trying to comfort Dazai, as he regressed in the bathroom.
Tsu and Ane-san’s gf are S tier ocs btw. No proper paragraph for that one, just that I was excited they got a cameo, Tsu’s utterly adorable, and I hope we see them again in the future.
Wait, no I did actually have a paragraph for that. But this is already way too long so I’m gonna let that be it’s own independent ask.
I loved all of the new fic, but my favourite bit was undoubtedly Chuuya’s daydream over giving Dazai a bath. It was such an earnest and innocent thing to fantasise about, yet it made so much sense why he’d crave giving the touch starved baby that type of love and care (I just love this Chuuya so much, man 🥲) but unfortunately, I ruined the entire scene for myself. Because while Chuuya was picturing the most idealistic, gentle, relaxing outcome of giving Dazai a bath, I was picturing an unspecific amount of years in the future, with a very different bath time scenario. Because realistically, Kunikida would not be living out Chuuya’s soothing daydream. Dazai’s bathtimes would be an exhausting, stressful and extremely wet occasion for him. He has two other littles to account for, both of which have zero boundaries when small and were amped up on their last bursts of energy before they crashed for bedtime. They did not care that they should be putting their pyjamas on- they wanted to play with their baby brother and nothing was keeping them out of the bathroom, dammit! And baby otter, the little traitor he is, was no help- squirming and splashing around, totally distracted by them as Kida’s desperately trying to scrub him down as quickly as possible. He can’t let them bathe together though, even if it shortens bath time down by a mile. Not after last time. Stressing out Kunikida has become an unfortunate pastime of mine and pairing it with Chuuya’s more relaxing potential experience makes me laugh more than it should.
In conclusion; the wet cat food was delicious and I’ll make sure to bring back many lizards as a show of gratitude.
-🍓
Another ask that I am going to print out and put under my pillow before i sleep in hopes i dream of this 🥺😭 the lizard….. i cherish it so……..
I live to torment kunikida via childish whimsy 😭 the Weekend at Kunikida’s House fic is brewing 😭😭😭😭😭 this whole thing was so precious omg of course baby otter is a traitor, he loves tormenting Kunikida as much as i do hehe
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anxiousgaypanicking · 1 year ago
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Dirty Talk
!a series of me uploading the kinktober fics/drabbles i made years ago because i didnt back in 2020 for some fuckin reason. if these are bad/poor quality its because theyre old, and ive improved since then :)!
Roceit (Roman x Janus) Day 29: dirty talk Warnings: degradation, blowjobs, leg humping
"How long will the others be out?" Roman asks, eyes turned towards the front door. Outside, rain poured, and every once in a while lightning struck, momentarily illuminating the otherwise dark living room.
The television was on, playing a movie that Roman had seen many times before, but it hardly provided much light during the current scene - one more dark and gritty. Roman craved the return of the sweet scenes with colour and light, so he'd suffer through the dark with a pout until they came on again.
Janus was curled up on the other side of the couch, a blanket draped over his lap, and a book in hand. Roman recognized it as one of Logan's books, identified easily by the sticky notes peaking out from between pages, no doubt covered in small lettering identifying parts of the book that Logan deemed interesting or noteworthy. Leaning forward slightly, Roman attempted to catch a glimpse of the title, but he couldn't manage.
"All Patton said was that they'd be back tonight," Janus responds, voice smooth as he flips a page. "Judging by how bad the storm has gotten, they might not even decide to do that. Virgil probably started freaking out the moment lightning struck."
"Do you think they're going to get a hotel?"
Janus sighs, as he closes the book over his thumbs, preserving his spot. "I don't know, Roman."
"Do you think we should call them and-"
Before Roman has the opportunity to finish his question, Janus shifts his position on the couch and kicks Roman's leg, Roman dramatically curling up into a ball and saying "ow! Meanie!" He's pouting, as he rubs the spot on his leg Janus had kicked, but Janus just rolls his eyes and sets the book on the coffee table, turning back to Roman entirely.
"Can you hush?" Janus states, as he stretches. After sitting idle for a long period of time, his body ached. "The others are probably fine. Pay attention to your movie or something; quit worrying about them." Upon seeing Roman's pout, Janus specifies "or at least quit vocalizing your worry. It's frankly quite annoying."
Roman whines out a protest, before he dramatically slumps over onto Janus's legs entirely. "But the movie is boring right now," he says, bottom lip jutted out in a point. "And I'm bored!"
Usually one of the others is able to distract him or entertain him for quite a bit of time, and even when they aren't around Roman can usually get wrapped up in his work to the point where he leaves Janus alone.
But, it seems that his wish for peace and quiet wouldn't be granted, as Roman whines and complains about a lack of stimuli while lightly pounding on Janus's legs similarly to the way a child would throw a tantrum.
"Pity," Janus hisses, as he kicks Roman away from his legs, before curling back up into a ball. His blanket had been discarded due to the movement, but before he could reach for it and toss it back over his lap, Roman crawls over the couch and fully rests his upper half on Janus's lap.
Janus never understood why Roman was so affectionate, even while complaining and pouting, and he didn't exactly know how to react. Pushing him off again would only result in Roman crawling back, despite the fact Janus didn't care that he was bored, and could honestly do without all the touching.
"Janus!" Roman whines, before he rubs his head against Janus's stomach, nuzzling him close in an attempt to cuddle him. Janus can't deny that he's very much enjoying the pure heat radiating of of the other, but he still let out an annoyed scowl as Roman then pleads "please, entertain me?"
With a scoff, Janus combs his hands through his own hair, clearly annoyed. However, knowing that Roman wouldn't quit bothering until he did, Janus sits up fully, stretching in an attempt to soothe the ache in his body from sitting still for so long.
Roman, sensing he'd convinced him, sits up fully too, excited by whatever idea Janus had or will come up with.
"What's your colour?" Janus asks, as he brushes off his lap, making it seem like Roman had some sort of disease that made Janus want to wipe away any potential germs. Roman flushes at his words, though, and ends up shyly looking away.
"Oh- oh. I didn't realize you'd want to do something so... so..." Roman stammers over his thoughts, clearly unsure of how to process the fact Janus wanted to do something sexual. "Well, to be frank, I didn't realize you wanted to have sex." His voice turns into a whisper as he nears the end of his sentence, clearly flustered by Janus's implications, but it just makes Janus roll his eyes.
"I take it that's a 'no,' then?" Janus asks, as he reaches for his book, although Roman immediately exclaims "no! I mean, no, that's not a no. Let me start over!"
He draws in a deep breath, desperately trying to will away the blush on his face, while also trying to sort out his thoughts, before he says "my colour is green. I just was caught off guard. Having sex is not what I expected to do tonight."
"And it's not what we'll do tonight," Janus replies, rolling his eyes yet again. "I'm not really in the mood to fuck you senseless." Roman's face turns a darker shade of red at Janus's bluntness, and he's convinced Janus phrased it that way on purpose judging by the way his lips quirked up in a smirk.
Roman scoots ever closer, staying cautious in case Janus decides to fluster him further, but Janus finally lets himself grin.
"I was thinking, how about you suck me off and shut up for a bit, and maybe, if I'm feeling up for it, I'll even let you come." Janus speaks smoothly, with confidence and smugness dripping from his words, and he pushes himself forward so that he's on his knees, face to face with Roman fully. He drags a finger under Roman's chin, and Roman leans forward, as if following it, eyes staring intensely into Janus's, much to Janus's delight.
Before Roman can even process what's happening, he's is sliding onto the floor, seemingly pleased with Janus's idea. He's nodding, still flustered, as he rambles "yeah- okay. Okay, that seems fun." It did seem fun. It wasn't what Roman was expecting by any means, but he asked for something to entertain him, and Janus was sweet enough to deliver.
Janus guides Roman to kneel between his legs, as he gracefully unbuttons his pants and tugs his boxers down just enough to pull out his cock.
He gives it a few strokes in order to work it to full hardness, and when he notices Roman staring, the words "what, see something you like, slut?" slip out of his mouth, sounding just as casual as if Janus was asking any other normal question.
And Roman's face is burning, as he swallows the spit in his mouth. That doesn't seem to satisfy Janus though, as his smirk falls into a slight frown. "I asked you a question, whore. Answer me," he grits out, moments later, and Roman shakes his head slightly, as if snapping himself out of his thoughts.
"Sorry," he apologizes, eyes glancing up at Janus who's looking down at him with intense eyes. Roman looks away, gulping, before he ends up looking back at Janus's cock. "Yeah- yeah I do. I like your cock," he answers, voice quiet and shy; a stark contrast to how loud and boastful Roman normally is. Admittedly, Janus likes how shy and easily embarrassed Roman is when it came to sex. It was different, and honestly quite cute.
"Good boy," Janus purrs, and Roman can't help the shiver of pleasure that courses through his body at the words.
He leans closer, and the tip of Janus's cock traces over his lips, and Roman's quick to open his mouth for it. Janus's cock slides into his mouth, and Roman has to resist moaning as the weight settles on his tongue.
Janus's fingers comb gently through his hair, although his words are a rough contrast, as he groans out "fuck, Roman. I like you so much better with your lips around my cock, like the good little slut you are."
Roman moans around Janus's length, before he takes more of it in, tonguing and sucking around the tip. It really is a mindless task, and it occupies Roman's mouth and gives his tongue something to do. His constant chattering and chewing on pen caps could have easily been replaced by sucking Janus off this entire time.
Maybe he'd ask to do this more often.
Stealing a glance up at Janus's face, Roman can see that Janus is relaxed against the couch, eyes gently closed and quiet moans slipping past his lips as Roman continues to lick and suck at his cock.
Roman takes it as his own pace, swallowing around the length as he leans in closer to take in more. The tip of Janus's cock rubs against the back of his throat, and as he gags, he leans back slightly. With just the tip in his mouth again, Roman's tongue runs over the slit, and Janus's fingers tighten in his hair, before Roman's head is moving back down.
He's taken up a slow pace, but he's focused on pleasuring Janus, and really focusing on the way Janus's cock felt in his mouth.
It's all he could really think about; the taste of precum dripping down his throat makes him moan, and he's quick to swallow what he can and suck eagerly in hopes more will be produced. As he takes in more of Janus's cock, he hums, trying hard not to gag this time. He wants to take it all, and as his nose presses against Janus's pelvic region, Roman can't help but moaning again.
Admittedly, he's hard just from sucking Janus off. His quiet moans are like music to Roman's ears, and he tries to discretely roll his hips against the carpet in hopes of relieving some of uncomfortable ache in his pants. His hands itched to undo his pants and stroke himself, but instead they settled on Janus's thighs, squeezing gently at the skin as he slowly bobs his head on Janus's cock.
It's relaxed, and compared to how rough Roman knew Janus could get, it was a nice change of pace. He was given full control, and was tasked with pleasuring Janus, and he was trying his hardest to do a good job.
"Good boy- my good little whore," Janus breathes, voice smooth and sweet, and Roman's closes his own eyes at the words, taking in the feeling of Janus's cock dragging across his tongue, the hand petting his head like he's a beloved pet, and Janus's words filling his ears. All the senses please him more, and he speeds up his bobbing slightly.
His hands tighten on Janus's legs as Janus moans out "fuck, Roman, I'm close."
It makes Roman shiver with delight, as he focuses primarily on driving Janus to come. His tongue laps over the slit, as he hums every time he fully deepthroats Janus's shaft. One of his hands fall from Janus's thigh, and instead moves to his balls, lightly squeezing and fondling them in an attempt to give Janus added pleasure.
With a light tug to his hair, and a groan of Roman's name, Janus suddenly comes in Roman's mouth. Roman chokes as he pulls back slightly, swallowing what he can in hopes nothing spills out and stains the carpet.
He wipes the remainder off his chin, before looking up at Janus with needy eyes. "Janus- Janus please get me off. I need to come so bad," he pleads, still pathetically humping the ground. Janus stares down at him, as if internally debating whether or not he'll let Roman come today.
With a sigh, though, Janus shifts his position slightly. He takes the time to tuck his cock back into his pants, before he moves one of his legs to rest between Roman's thighs.
"You can hump against my leg," Janus says, as if that's a privilege. "If you don't want to, then you won't be getting off at all tonight."
It was either humiliate himself or be stuck painfully hard and desperate until his boner sadly went away. Weighing both options, Roman found he'd much rather come that have to hold back entirely, so he leans against Janus's leg, face bright red as he very shyly grinds against Janus's shin.
"Ah-ah," Janus tuts, raising an eyebrow as Roman looks up at him. "Be polite, Roman. What do you say?"
Roman doubts his face can get anymore red than it is currently, and he stammers over his word as he looks away from Janus's face, overly flustered. Despite his embarrassment, he still utters "thank you, Janus," which earns Janus combing through his hair and responding with "good boy, Roman."
He keeps his head down and tucked into Janus's leg, whining softly as he gets slightly more confident with his grinding. He's rolling his hips repeatedly against Janus's leg, humping against him like a mutt in heat, and Janus compares him to such too.
"You're loving this, aren't you?" he asks, although it's a rhetorical question. He doesn't expect Roman to answer, and he doesn't want him to either. "Grinding against me like a fucking dog. A stupid bitch. That's what you are; a fucking mutt."
Roman moans at his words, cock leaking in his pants, and he knows he won't last much longer. He's babbling out a mixture of Janus's name and incoherent noises, needing to do something with his mouth now that it's unoccupied again.
"Janus- Janus please," he begs, not exactly knowing what he's begging for. For a less humiliating way to get off, perhaps? Although it doesn't seem like Janus has changed his mind on that, as he starts moving his leg up in an attempt to match Roman's grinds down.
In doing so, Roman's head falls back in a pleased moan, as he grips tighter to Janus's leg. "Please!" he cries, face flushed and hair disheveled from Janus's hand constantly running through his locks, and as Janus admires his pathetic face, he notices that Roman's even drooling.
"Are you close, Roman?" Janus asks, and Roman can really only whine and nod as his forehead rests against Janus's legs. It makes Janus grin just seeing the way Roman's body trembled slightly. So overwhelmed from so little stimuli.
Smiling softly, Janus then purrs "come for me then, slut. Make a mess of your pants like the dirty whore you are."
And, well, Roman can't really disobey. Grinding a bit more against Janus's leg pushes him completely over the edge, and his head lolls back as he lets out a high whine and comes in his pants. He humps against Janus as he rides out his orgasm, before he slumps over completely, breathing heavily.
"Alright, Roman," Janus says, after a moment, causing Roman to look up at him, still breathing heavily. Janus holds his arms out as he moves his leg back, and Roman looks at him confused.
"Come cuddle," Janus then clarifies, rolling is eyes, although it sounds more like an order. It's a demand that Roman is happy to follow. Although somewhat uncomfortable feeling the dampness in his pants, he doesn't hesitate crawling onto the couch with Janus, and nuzzling up against his chest.
After all, they had all the time in the world to cuddle. The rest of the night, anyway, and they could probably manage to shower before the others got home. Hopefully, at least.
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evwuniverse · 2 months ago
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Interesting Encounter- Impromptu Story Time In Second Life During So Kawaii Sunday
For those of you who don't know, there are groups that you can join and get discounts on popular products within Second Life. Some of the most popular ones are So Kawaii Sundays for you cutie patooties out there. And the Saturday Sale. Of course, there are many others but that will be discussed in a future post. I needed to discuss this part to set the scene of what occurred. As everyone knows, everyone's Second Life experience is different. We encounter many people along our daily adventures. To be honest, me? not so much. I tend to keep to myself lately due to real-life burnout and overstimulation. However, when I do go out I'm always willing to chat and secretly crave it. But only you (the reader) and I need to know that.
Well, it's not every day someone hops into my DM's as for the most part everyone else is also keeping to themselves and just jumping shop to shop for the sale items. So when this happened I was a bit surprised but glad it did. I was at the landing point at the front of a store. Cool. A lot of the sale items were right there at the landing point so I didn't have to walk far to get what I needed. I hear the lovely message ping we all hear when someone DM's us. Because the person's profile in the upper right hand corner didn't look familiar I took a look. To keep this individual anonymous I will not be using their screen name for this story.
"Help, I can't take the part off."
"What part?"
"Take a guess?"
I couldn't help but laugh but at the same time my people-pleasing self is always willing to help people and the fact of the matter is out of all the people he could've messaged he chose me. I'm a firm believer that everything happens for a reason so I explained to him exactly how to remove the "part" he was referring to. I checked to be sure he had it all handled and I decided "You know what, dude's probably new, let me welcome him and help where I can." When I first started I didn't meet anyone that helped me until my Second or Third week into being on Second Life and it was the kindness of that one stranger that kept me around. Now I'm going on 13 years with my current account, with my past account which if I remember correctly I deleted or just forgot how to log into it but it was the account I had on the Teen Grid. I made a new account once the grids merged. That will also be another post in the future.
When I walked over, I said to him, "Did you get it all situated" he said yes, but I could tell in his typing tone that he was a bit frustrated. He was looking to add his chain to his character that he had and I told him how but he told me that he didn't know what it was called. I told him to search his inventory for "chain" to see if anything came up and provided him with a few inventory organization tips for moving forward. Apparently, his profile stated he was 5 months old but according to him he wasn't on that long he was on for about a week left and didn't come back and decided to try again. I'm telling you all it takes is one act of random kindness at a time, I asked him if he wanted to add me and I could help out and I didn't mind. He didn't add me but I did help him. Because of this encounter, he most likely will be back on.
It made me think though, IMVU has mentors on there why can't Second Life do the same? Gather a group of volunteers and either provide them for lindens for their time or provide them with a special profile tag or something and they live their Second Life but when there is someone who needs help or is new in an area they can come to you to ask questions, etc? I feel this would be extremely beneficial. I feel the tutorial island is a good start but what about when people are actually in the world and off of tutorial island? I feel there needs to be something put in place for new users to enjoy experiencing Second Life while being new. Thanks to the kindness of people that is why people stay on the Second Life platform is when they experience help to begin and then do their thing.
I felt this encounter was important to share and since I haven't been on Tumblr a lot because I keep forgetting to actually come on and write even though I'm on Second Life and IMVU it was time to post more content. I'm really surprised some of my followers have still stuck around with how spotty I am with my blogging haha.
Ahead of time, thank you for taking the time to read and support my blog it means a lot. I do this for fun and honestly just grateful that others are reading my content. I will be working on potentially making tutorial videos in Second Life to help others further. There are a lot on YouTube but after this interaction what's the harm in one more? Thank you for sticking around with me and I'll see you in the next post.
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seasidepierre · 2 years ago
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i sent in the max drabble idea about the cooking but it would absolutely also work for pierre! i actually meant to add that in my original ask :)
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It had taken a grand total of five gurgling stomach noises, six “Ugh, I’m hungry” and about a thousand sighs for Pierre to understand that you, in fact, were famished. Not that your boyfriend was usually this ignorant when it came to your state (he actually never was, he was pretty perceptive in normal times and mindful to have you happy, fed and content) but he had been playing Warzone for what felt like forever and despite your constant signs throwing at him that you wanted him to put that damn controller down, he had been somewhat yelling into his headset for Charles to actually “do something, God dammit!”. 
Needless to say, you had heard Charles’ yells in your little living room more than the soft music you had been playing in hopes it’d drown the yelling, the gunshots and the helicopter blades whirring. You didn’t even comprehend where the fun was in throwing yourself in a game of war like those two kept doing. You had gladly accepted Pierre moved his console from his parents’ to your place because you didn’t want to prevent him from playing and having fun and you also weren’t against video games yourself, but you hadn’t expected it to turn your flat into a scene of battle. 
“Are you okay?” Pierre had finally asked after the uptenth sigh you had heaved. 
“I’m hungry,” You had moaned back.
“Well eat something,” Pierre had giggled.
“Pierre, it’s almost 10pm, I’ve been waiting for you for dinner,” You had explained.
“IT’S TEN PM?” Charles had yelled back.
“Hi Charles, yes, it’s past ten, even,” You had responded.
“Oh shoot, my girlfriend has been waiting for me too,” Charles had explained. “I think it’s time to call it quits, mate.”
“Tell her I said hi,” Pierre smiled fondly. “We’ll get back to this tomorrow?”
“Sure, if we’re both free and our poor girls aren’t too mad.”
“I’m never mad, Charles, I’m happy you guys are having fun, I’m just hungry.”
“She’s the best,” Pierre giggled. “See you soon mate,” He added, before turning the console off. “I’m sorry I lost track of time, do you want me to cook to make myself forgiven?” He smiled, his hands coming down on your thighs to drape your legs over his. 
“What do you have in mind?”
“What are you in the mood for?”
“Kinda am craving pasta right now.”
“How about fresh bolognese? And I’ll make my famous chocolate cake for dessert?”
“You would?” You lit up like a Christmas tree.
“I know how much you love it.”
“That chocolate cake is the best thing I’ve ever had,” You whined, closing your eyes and falling into his chest. “Don’t joke about that chocolate cake.”
“Do I ever lie to you?”
He never was. Of all the boyfriends you’ve had (not that you’d had that many), Pierre was the most honest, upfront guy you’ve ever got to date. It probably was because you were best friends before you ever became more, but he had no issue telling you the truth as it was, just like you didn’t wear gloves when the time of hard truths came. You would call him out on his ego sometimes and he would be blatantly honest when you’d be wearing a questionable outfit. It was never mean or rude, it was looking out for the best for each other and you loved that. 
Pierre took your hand and dragged your body back up. He pushed you to the kitchen and sat you on the counter next to where he was currently setting up everything he needed. He grabbed a carrot, an onion, the ground beef, a can of tomato pulp, salt, pepper, butter and everything else he needed before he opened a couple of cabinets to fetch a couple of pans, one for the sauce, one for the pasta. 
“So what are we gonna do first?” You asked.
“You always start with the sauce, because it takes a bit more time to cook,” He explained.
“You seemed to know a lot about this,” You teased him.
He smiled at the onion he was currently chopping, his eyes barely even watering which was a miracle but it seemed to be down to the fact that he had run his knife under water beforehand, something you didn’t even know. 
“When I moved to Italy, I was so completely lost at the beginning. Like, obviously you find the same type of products than here, but they do things differently and it was the first time I was really on my own and responsible for my meals.. So I took a few cooking classes with one of my neighbours. She was very helpful.”
“Oh you found yourself a nice lady in Italy, then?” You semi-joked, a bit of jealousy appearing in the pits of your stomach. 
“She was seventy and couldn’t stop gushing about her grandkids,” Pierre laughed. “You have nothing to worry about, mon amour.”
You felt so dumb that all you could do was lean your forehead on his shoulder and looked at what he was doing. Pierre started by putting the oil, butter and chopped onion in the pan that he had previously placed on the stove. He told you that you should always stick to the medium heat, because the higher one just had a tendency to burn everything, which made you smile because you had no idea Pierre knew this much about cooking. He left you in charge of the stirring while he was making sure the ground beef was correctly salted and peppered, before he crumbled it with a fork that he had fished in a drawer.
The fact that he knew exactly where to find everything was still making your heart swell, even though he had been somewhat living with you for almost six months now. 
He added the beef, told you to keep an eye open and to let him know when the meat wouldn’t be red anymore. After that, he did something you hadn’t expected and added milk to the preparation, which made you frown but he laughed, telling you that it was a secret he had learned from his neighbour and to trust him. So you did, especially when he uncorked a bottle of white wine, poured a quarter of it in your pan and grabbed two glasses for you to sip on while he took back the reins, or, more accurately, the wooden spoon. You did pour the tomato pulp, because he let you do it while he was filling the pot with water to cook the spaghetti and got another bowl to start on the chocolate cake while you were supervising the bolognese. 
The kitchen smelled deliciously good and the rumbling in your stomach truly kept getting louder and louder, only tamed by the sips of white wine you were getting and with the hand of Pierre rubbing gently your belly from behind you, before dropping a kiss on the crook of your shoulder. 
“It’s almost ready, I swear,” Pierre reassured you. “The cake will bake while we eat, it’ll still be warm for dessert, which I know is your favourite way of having it.”
“Do we have custard to go with it?” You enquired.
“I grabbed a brick at the grocery store. I knew you would ask for that cake and I knew you’d ask for custard with it,” Pierre tenderly confirmed.
“You know me so well,” You kissed him, lovingly.
“After all these years? I sure hope so. I’ve known you since we were five, mon amour!”
“And? You could have not paid attention,” You shrugged.
“Me? Not paying attention to you? That would have been worrying,” He scoffed. “I still remember that your favourite pen in primary school was a pink one with a little cat at the top of it.”
You giggled at his confession, still admirative that you weren’t the only one collecting details about him that you had carefully tucked in a corner of your memory. You knew everything there was to know about Pierre and he knew everything there was to know about you. You were each other’s guardian of everything that made yourselves you. 
“It’s funny how vocal you were and how you taught me to make that bolognese, but not the chocolate cake,” You remarked.
“That’s because one, the bolognese isn’t rightly made, it should stew for like three hours but you’re hungry so we’re doing a crash version of it, and two, I’m afraid you love that cake more than me, so it I teach you how to make it, I’ll be useless,” Pierre joked.
“You’re an idiot,” You giggled.
“Maybe, but I’m your idiot, so it’s your problem, really,” He shrugged, amused.
He was. He was your idiot and that truly made you so happy, it was ridiculous. You couldn’t remember the last time you thought you truly belonged to someone, someone that wasn’t Pierre already because he was your best friend and you were his and that’s what mattered the most. But to know that you could leave your heart into his hands, appreciating the fact that you didn’t have to fear anything because he would protect it fiercely? That was more than words could describe. 
Dating Pierre wasn’t easy every day. When it wasn’t the loneliness, the tears at every goodbye or the frustration that sometimes made him hurtful without realising, your insecurities kept telling you that you always were on the verge of being replaced by someone who would be thinner, prettier, more available, someone who would let him in charge and would accept to be dependent on him, so he’d never be alone. 
But when it came to the solar boy in your kitchen, baking your favourite cake just because he wanted to make you happy, you knew you were safe and cherished for years to come.
Or maybe even for infinity.
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shina913 · 3 years ago
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Intersect, Part 3 | KNJ
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Intersect, Part 3
Definition: To meet and cross at a point; To share a common area
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✫✫✫Intersect Masterlist✫✫✫
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Pairing: KNJ x fem!reader; MYG x fem reader
Rating: M (🔞), NSFW
Genre: Office!AU; enemies to lovers; fluff; angst; smut
Word count: 4.8K+ words
Warnings: office banter; excessive cussing; secret office romance; unrequited love; explicit sexual language; cheesy pickup lines; praise kink; protected/penetrative sex; fingering; breast/nipple play; slightly(?) rough sex; hints of oral sex (F-receiving; mentioned once); dirty talk
Summary: You hate him, he hates you. You were both fine staying in your own lanes--until you're forced to work together on a make-or-break project for your company.
A/N: So--Grammys Yoongi would not let me rest and attacked me from all sides. He basically just wrote all of the content for this update! Also, the next few chapters will contain scenes heavily inspired by (actually, some directly lifted) from the movie, Someone Like You (2001). It's a fun, albeit cliché, rom-com but one of my faves! I just thought it would be cute to incorporate some of them in this storyline because I just live for Joon and YN's bickering! If you know the movie...ssshhhh no spoilers!
❤️, comment, reblog, or send me feedback! 📩. I love hearing from readers (whether you liked it or not so much). Thanks to all who have read the first two parts, and sent me messages!
My taglist is open as well so just reply to this post or DM me and I'll add you.
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“I had a really good time tonight.”
“I did, too.” Yoongi says.
You were walking back to your apartment from the subway, after your dinner where you talked about the most random things. Based on the publications and conferences you’ve attended where he’s been a guest speaker, he seemed like such a serious and intellectual person who was only interested in talking about whatever they were currently studying–or something much more boring than that. In reality, he was funny, quick-witted, and had an affinity for dry humor, which you found charming.
“You know, Yoongi…I–I have to confess, you’re not at all what I expected.”
He furrows his brows in curiosity. “Meaning?”
“I don’t know…This is going to sound really weird but I thought you were totally unapproachable and closed off. I haven’t met many people in our field who are as outgoing and just…normal as you are.”
He chuckles. “I know most of us are huge nerds. We get sucked into a study or a topic and it’s easy to isolate yourself from everyone else just to get these theoretical questions answered. But to address your query–I’m just like anybody. I enjoy socializing–to a certain extent,” he laughs. “And…I crave good company as much as the next person–not just because I’m conducting an investigative study on a certain demographic.”
You laughed at that…it was a research joke.
“I think sometimes that’s what’s missing in some of our studies…it’s way too much thinking and calculation. We tend to forget the human element, you know? Especially, feelings and emotions.”
Your brows quirk at his last point. It’s exactly what you’ve been advocating for when you decided to dive into this area of study. Math and science had an underlying predictability. But the emotional aspect is typically left out or not even considered because that would make the work subjective. And in your line of work, most clients prefer objectivity–they want things in black and white–no gray areas–especially for government contracts. They just want to know where the money is going, if it’s doing what it’s supposed to do, and if not, what do the numbers say that they should do?
You nodded. “I couldn't agree more with that. I think that we put way too much stock on objectivity when in fact, we, as researchers, have our own biases. So–I’m not sure how you can just completely extricate yourself from that.”
“That’s a cycle that I’ve spent most of my career breaking. Just–the whole point of, we get the job order, collect that data and conclude that you can do options A or B–and leave it up to the client to decide,” he shrugs.
“But it’s so much more than that, isn’t it? The fact is, there are real people whom we’re interviewing and studying. They shouldn’t be treated as random tallies on a sheet.”
“I like where you’re going with that, Miss Jeon.”
You stopped at your building’s front entrance, keys already on-hand.
“It’s something that I try to instill within my staff as well,” you smiled proudly as you stood there, facing one another.
He stares at you in awe. “Where have you been this whole time? I feel like we could have collaborated on so many good things.”
You chuckled and shrugged your shoulders. “We just needed to wait ‘til the time was right, I guess.”
He took a couple of steps towards you–he was…inappropriately close but you weren’t moving away nor stopping him.
“Well, I hope you’ll forgive me if I can't wait for the right time to do this.” His lips land on yours. They were incredibly soft and plush as they moved against yours. You sighed softly into his mouth as he briefly slipped his tongue into yours–just to get a quick taste before he pulled away.
Screw Namjoon and his stupid Employee Handbook.
You tried not to sound too breathless. “Would you like to come up and see my cat?” You suddenly blurted out.
Yoongi furrows his eyebrows in confusion. “I beg your pardon?”
You try not to panic. “I meant, coffee. Would you like to come up and have some coffee?”
He gives you a gummy smile. “Sure, coffee sounds good.”
Once you unlock your security gate and walk through the front door and into your kitchen, you start to grab a couple of mugs and call out to him over your shoulder while you sort through some K-cup pods.
Unaware, he saunters behind you.
You’re startled when you find him standing next to you. Nervously, you ask, “Uh–I have a couple options here–just tell me what kind you like?”
“I like anything full-bodied,” he says in a dangerously low tone.
Your lips twitch. “O-okay. Brew temperature?”
He moves in closer. “Hot.”
Your heart was pounding now. “Sweetener?” you ask breathlessly as he closes the gap between you.
“Mm–don’t need it. Not around you,” he says before he crashes his lips into yours, pressing you against your kitchen counter. His tongue caressed your mouth in a slow, sweeping motion that had you leaning closer for more.
Things escalated quickly and you moved into your bedroom.
It wasn’t long before you felt the back of your legs hit the side of your mattress.
He lowers you into it, keeping his lips locked on yours. Feeling his full weight on you turned you on like you couldn’t describe. His hands snake up your thighs as you moan into his mouth.
Be careful whom you fraternize with.
You gasp then recoil abruptly from Yoongi.
“A-are you okay? Did I do something wrong?”
The fuck? Why is his voice in your head at this moment?
“If-if you changed your mind, that’s totally fine. Just say so,” Yoongi says reassuringly as he caresses your cheek.
You shake your thoughts away. “N-no. I meant, no, I haven’t changed my mind. I want this. I just wondered if you’d be okay with switching it up?”
He regards you with renewed interest. “Switch it up, how?”
You pushed up against him and shifted slightly until you had him pinned to your mattress. You sat up then straddled his hips, the motion hiking the bottom of your slip-dress up your thighs.
His eyes, filled with want, drank you in while you sat on top of him. “Well, alright then,” he bites his lower lip.
He watches as you pick up the hem of your dress and bring it up and over your head, tossing it to the side, leaving you with just your lingerie on.
He sighs softly as he slides his tongue across his bottom lip.
“You have way too many clothes on, Mr. Min,” you point out.
“And what should we do about that?”
You curled all ten fingers onto his shirt and with one swift move from you, he watched his buttons fly all over the place.
“Much better,” your lips curved into a smile.
His hunger for you rumbled and it wasn’t long before he sits up to kiss you again–more aggressively this time.
He pulls away for a moment only to take his wallet out of his back pocket to retrieve a foil packet from it before sealing his mouth over yours again.
You barely feel him reach behind you to unhook your bra then quickly slipping it off you. He leaves a trail of wet kisses down your neck and to your sternum. With a slight bend of his neck, he ran the tip of his tongue over your nipple in a slow, teasing flick which elicited a harsh gasp from you.
He didn’t give you time to process before he fully wrapped his lips around your breast, sucking hard.
“Ah, fuck,” you breathed out, your body almost tipping over from pleasure before caught you, tilting you back into his arms before shifting to your other breast, giving it the same amount of attention.
Your clit throbbed and practically begged for some kind of friction that you started, grinding your hips against his cock–which you could already feel was straining from how hard it felt underneath your still-clothed core.
Sensing your impatience, mouth still sealed on a nipple, he slides a hand between your legs. His fingers slips past the lacy material and starts to rub between your needy folds, making you cry out hoarsely.
You could have cum right then–it really has been that long.
“I can’t wait anymore, Yoongi,” you whined.
He pulls away from your chest only to slip two fingers into you. “Tell me what you want, YN,” he asks gruffly.
“You. I want you in me now,” you said a little too desperately, grinding your hips against his fingers.
He watches your face contort in pleasure while his digits continue to pump in and out of you. “You’re so wet,” he whispers before he nips at your bottom lip.
“Yoongi–please…I want you to fuck me.” You barely recognized your voice as you begged him to put his cock in you.
He withdraws his hands slowly to lift you slightly off him. You take the opportunity to shed your soaked panties while he unzips his pants and rips the foil packet with his teeth.
You climb up on top of him again just in time to pull his cock out, taking the condom and slipping it down his length. His eyes roll to the back of his head as he drags out a deep moan while you pumped him slowly.
“Do you want to ride?”
You gave him a small nod as he rested his hands on either side of your hips while he lays flat on the mattress.
He guides you while you ease yourself down onto him. He closes his eyes and flexes his hips to meet yours, filling you, stretching you, as he exhales.
“You feel so good,” he murmurs as your walls clench around him.
You rise again, taking more of him in, feeling a little too drunk with the power you currently had–watching Min Yoongi slowly coming apart beneath you. You place your hands on his shoulders for support until you take him to the hilt.
You started to roll your hips slow–getting used to the sensation of him filling you. He counters your rhythm perfectly in sync—all thought and reason out the door. You pick up the pace and it wasn’t long before you were completely lost in pleasure.
He sits up, hands moving up from your hips to your arms, keeping a firm grip on them shortly before he withdraws slightly then thrusts into you sharply, causing you to cry out.
Your head lolls sideways and back, as he fucks in and out of you. My god, he does that so well.
You open your eyes, stare down at him, your breathing ragged, and he’s staring back at you, eyes blazing.
“So fucking good,” he mouths.
“Yes,” you rasp.
He groans loudly, closing his eyes again, tipping his head and leaning it against your forehead.
“I’m so close,” you managed to say between pants.
“Yeah? Are you gonna cum all over me?”
“Hmmmmfuck, yes…don’t stop,” you mewled as you clenched even tighter around his cock.
“I can’t–too good…” he stutters as he continues to thrust his hips against you.
Seeing Yoongi undone is enough to tip you over the edge. You cum audibly, collapsing on top of him.
“Ahh, fuck…” he groans as he finds his release, holding you still.
Your cheek is nestled on his shoulder, catching your breath, trying to get your pulse back to normal.
He smooths your hair, and his hand runs down your back, caressing you as he calms his own breathing.
He lifts you and eases out of you. You wince as he does. After he discards the condom, he leans forward and kisses you softly.
“You’re amazing, you know that?”
Sitting up on your bed, you tilt your head slightly and gaze up at him, your expression skeptical. As he stands in front of you, he sees the look you give him and frowns. He bends down slightly towards you and nuzzles his nose to yours.
“I mean it. You are amazing, YN,” he says again, his tone emphatic.
You smiled as you felt something shift within you. You had to pinch yourself. Suddenly, this man–someone whom you had admired, revered for years, was in your bedroom in all his post-sex glory. It was as real as the sweat that beaded on his forehead.
You kiss him gently and let yourself fall into him.
******
The following morning, before stepping out of your apartment, you tugged at his wrist.
“Listen–about last night…not that I have any regrets or anything,” you began.
He straightens out, waiting for your next thought.
“I hope this doesn’t complicate things for us at work,” you ask tentatively.
“Why would you think that?”
You exhaled sharply. “I guess you could say that some people like to keep things strictly professional, you know?”
“I have no problem keeping things professional,” he says matter-of-factly.
This placates you. “Okay. I just wanted to put that out there–”
“YN, what we do during our private time is nobody’s business. And it shouldn’t be–that’s why it’s ‘private.’ I like spending time with you and I hope you feel the same?”
You gave him a small smile.
He took it as a good sign. “Okay.”
“I just don’t want it to be a whole thing at work, you know?”
“I understand what you mean. And I want you to know that we’re on the same page. Okay?”
“Okay.”
“Now…do you know of a good place to get some breakfast around here?”
You chuckled. “Yes, in fact, I do.”
******
“I’m so sorry about your shirt,” you giggled.
You were coming off a high after a quick bite to eat at the diner around the corner from your place. You decided to take the long way home–just to extend this time with him a bit more. You walked side-by-side, with his arm around your shoulder and your arm around his waist.
“I mean–” He glances down at it. It was only done up halfway since you had ripped off the top three buttons.
“They never really had a chance to begin with,” he chuckles. At least he had a jacket on–or else this walk would have been more scandalous than intended.
Just then, you passed a thrift store and looked over to find some dress shirts for sale.
“Hey, let’s get you a new one,” you said, motioning over to the display rack.
“What?” He laughs. “You don’t think this is a good look?”
“It is, but–” you bit your lip, trying to rein in your thirst. “We wouldn’t want you to look like you’re doing the walk of shame, right,” you teased as you picked up a black, pinstriped, collared button-down off the rack.
He eyes it for a second. “Alright then,” he says as he takes his wallet out.
“No, no,” you stopped him. “I got it,” you smiled, walking into the store and paying at the register.
He gets into a dressing room, puts the shirt on right away and you both walk out of the store, hand in hand.
“Thank you,” he utters as his arms wrap around your waist, pulling you closer to him and giving you a quick peck on the lips.
“You’re welcome,” you said as you smiled through your kisses.
Somehow, out of the corner of your eye, past Yoongi’s shoulder, you spot somebody familiar.
You suddenly withdrew your hands from Yoongi’s chest and gently pushed him off.
“Shit, just act normal,” you mutter under your breath.
“Huh?” Yoongi is utterly confused.
“Good morning!”
Yoongi whips his head around to find Namjoon pulling up his bike. He stops by the curb, next to where you both stood while balancing his bike with one leg planted on the ground, eyeing the both of you.
“Hey,” you and Yoongi said at the same time.
“Please don’t let me intrude!” Namjoon says with a sly grin plastered on his face–his obnoxious dimples front-and-center.
“No! Not at all,” you exclaimed a little too loudly. “We were just uhh–” you point and turn to Yoongi while you scramble to find the right words.
“We–I mean–I just ran into him at this store,” you stuttered and chuckled nervously. “I happen to live right up here and was taking a walk…and, and then I saw Yoongi browsing through some shirts here. He looked like he needed some help,” you explained unnecessarily.
“Yeah, uh–I guess looked desperate for a woman’s opinion after all,” Yoongi randomly says, trying to figure out where you were going with this.
“And we got to talking and he just told me that he also happens to live in this neighborhood�� which I absolutely had no idea whatsoever! Who knew?” you babbled further.
Namjoon just stares back at Yoongi then back at you.
You cleared your throat and gave Yoongi a look. “Anyway, Yoongi, didn’t you say that you had a thing? That you were going somewhere?”
He hesitates for a bit. “Y-yeah. Yes–I do. It was–great running into you, YN.”
“I-It was great running into you, too, Yoongi. A-and you too, Namjoon. Have a great rest of your weekend,” you stammer before Yoongi walks away.
“See ya,” Namjoon says to Yoongi before turning his attention back to you, giving you a knowing smile.
You try to scramble to save the situation. “What a coincidence, huh? First, I run into Yoongi and then you happen to be biking around this neighborhood, too? Such a small, small world!”
“Uh huh,” he says smugly.
Fuck. The jig is up and he knows it.
You exhaled sharply. “Fine. So we’re kind of seeing each other. Happy?”
He doesn’t say anything and just looks at you, his shoulders vibrating up and down from the laugh that he was trying so hard to stifle.
You groaned. “We’re…not necessarily telling anybody at the office, okay? And I would hope you’d keep this to yourself for the time-being?”
Namjoon snorts then looks away briefly. He clears his throat and looks back at you.
“What? What are you thinking?”
He shrugs his shoulders. “I’m thinking the same thing you are, YN. How you and Yoongi will live happily ever after with your matching Hyundais and goldendoodles,” he says condescendingly while he cackles.
Afterwards, he shifts his weight to get back on his bike and starts to pedal away.
You were seething. “Did you have any friends growing up?!” You yelled out at him.
“Better hurry–I think I see him waiting for you around the corner over there,” he calls out over his shoulder as he rides away further.
******
Director-nim Celina, is quite the accomplished woman. She looked young for her age but she’s had a lot of experience under her belt.
She received her Ph.D. from Yale and after a few years working as part-time lecturer at local universities and shifting from one policy research firm to another, she finally built up her own capital and started her own firm.
It helped that she had already built up a great reputation in the field so once she found her footing, other great minds didn’t take long to join the company.
One would think that when you worked in this field, you were constantly behind-the-scenes like a hermit so you didn’t have to worry much about the way you looked. It’s statistics and research, for chrissakes!
But not Celina Choi. To promote her firm in its early stages, she had to look and dress the part.
She wore her dark tresses short, which stopped right above her shoulders. She always looked like she had walked straight out of a salon with a blowout.
And though she didn’t put heavy makeup on, she frequently wore a bold lip. Fire-engine red, tangerine, oxblood, magenta—it was her signature, so to speak. Anything that would draw a listener’s attention to her mouth was a good strategy for her.
She wore tailored pantsuits, sheath dresses, pencil skirts—for a woman in her 40s, she could give the younger ones a run for their money.
She worked the annual conference circuit and networked to no end. She strategically partnered with larger firms as a subcontractor and managed to lure out other talents from there.
Some people might think that she was playing dirty by poaching their best researchers from them but Celina’s pitch was simple: come work with me and not for me.
It was the same pitch that she used on all of her recruits–one of which was currently in deep conversation with her in her office.
You stood a ways down the hallway with your ankles crossed over the other and tried not to stare at him while they spoke but it was hard to pry your eyes away from him, especially after memories from the weekend plagued you all day.
He stayed over til mid-day Saturday after you had breakfast at the diner around the corner from your place—leaving only after he ate you out and fucked you in the middle of your kitchen.
When Celina turns away from him to retrieve something from her desk, he glances at you through the glass wall. As if reading your dirty thoughts, his lips curve into a slow, sexy, almost devilish smile.
You smile back at him, suddenly feeling hot under the collar before he turns his attention back to your boss, who was trying to show him something on her tablet.
“You look pretty happy there.”
His deep voice startles you and knocks you back to reality. “Why? You got something against people who are happy?”
“Not at all,” Namjoon grins sarcastically. “As long as you’re not stepping on anybody’s toes.”
You leaned in, pouting mockingly. “Aww…do your toes hurt, Namjoon?”
He chuckles then lowers his voice. “You wish you could climb up on me and step on these toes,” he says to you.
You gasp at the comment, taken aback for a moment then suddenly burst out laughing.
He cocks an eyebrow at you. “Should I take that as a ‘no’?”
You puckered your lips and hummed. “It’s more of a–’Thanks for the offer, but not if my life depended on it,’” you hissed.
“Well, if it isn’t my top team managers!” Celina exclaims as she and Yoongi approach you and Namjoon, halting your bickering.
You both straighten your postures and smile innocently at her like students trying to act perfectly behaved in front of the principal.
“So, I’m just checking in to make sure that the proposal is ready to go to the client soon? I know the deadline is not optimal since it’s the same week that we’re supposed to go on our company retreat–but I’m confident that if anybody can pull this off, you two can. Am I right?”
“Yes!” Namjoon says.
“Oh, totally,” you replied.
“Good! Also, I want to get a final look at it once I get back from the annual conference—which, Yoongi, so graciously agreed to assist me with. Nothing like showing off our new rockstar to attract the cream of the crop to our firm, huh?”
You and Namjoon nod in agreement.
Celina turns to Namjoon. “You’re going to this year’s retreat, right?”
“Yes, I am,” he confirms.
“Okay–just making sure because you’ve skipped the last two. It would be nice to have 100% attendance there, especially with senior leadership.”
“You can count on it, Celina.”
“Excellent. And, YN–are you up for defending your Office Olympics medal this year? I know Jin would love to take a crack at it again since he took the silver medal last year,” Celina says.
Before you could answer, Namjoon jumps in. “Not if I have a say in it.”
Celina’s lips curve into a slow smile. “Oh-ho-ho…looks like we’ve got a great matchup! I almost forgot that you won gold in those previous years, Namjoon.”
You interjected before he could agree. “That’s only because I wasn’t with the firm yet,” you addressed him directly.
He scoffs and narrows his eyes at you. “Is that so?”
“Oh yeah. You’re up against some stiff competition, Kim Namjoon.”
“Alright–let’s save all the trash talk for the games, huh?” Celina tries to intervene and steps between the both of you. “But I love the competitive energy! See, this is why I put your teams together. You’re both just so into it! I love it! I want to feel the same level of passion when I do the final read-through of your proposal.”
You both nodded, biting the inside of your cheek. Celina then turns her attention back to Yoongi as they finalize their plans for the upcoming conference. “So anyway, I was thinking—we should strategize which lectures we’re attending because I think that it would be more efficient…” she trails off as they both walk away from you.
Yoongi steals another glance from you and you give him a small smile in return.
Out of the corner of his mouth, Namjoon clears his throat then lowers his voice to almost a whisper. “You know I won’t take anything from you lying down.”
You grinned cockily. “You wish you could take me lying down,” you mumbled back to him.
His jaw ticks and a low growl escapes his chest as you flip your hair and back away from him, clearly pleased with the effect of your last words.
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Part 4◥
Taglist: @deepseavibez @dany-but-not-targaryen @scuzmunkie @sweetjellyfishland @joeybeanxbts @amylouisecullen @knjkitten @gcintia @daphnxy @rkivecenter @serendididy @arisud
[OPEN]
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pennylaneforthoughts · 3 years ago
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After some thinking, a conversation with my sister-in-law with a psych degree, and a couple of sessions with my godsend of a therapist, I think I've finally put my finger on the thing about Mobius that Loki (and a lot of the fandom tbh) so quickly latched onto like a man dying of thirst at the first sign of water:
Unconditional positive regard.
This concept is at the core of client-centered psychology and basically is a stance that a therapist will take in relation to their client, where they simply accept and support their client as a person, regardless of what they do or say.
My therapist uses this framework with me, and when the Loki series came out, I immediately saw Mobius and was like "holy crap, this man has the exact same energy as Sami what???" And I couldn't for the life of me figure out why until I was talking about it with my sister-in-law and she mentioned unconditional positive regard. And then it clicked.
Mobius radiates unconditional positive regard from the minute he meets Loki in episode 1, and arguably even from the first time we even see him onscreen. He approaches everyone he interacts with using a basic framework of "I see you and care about you as a person, and nothing you do or say can change that," so we immediately get the impression that this man is soft, kind, and shaped like a friend. However, it's most obvious and pointed in his interactions with Loki.
While yes, Mobius' primary objective in episode 1 is to interrogate Loki, it's important to note that it's not an interrogation where Mobius is trying to find proof of guilt for a crime like we'd see in a typical detective procedural. Rather, Mobius is trying to see if this variant of Loki is self aware enough to be able to help him in his hunt for Sylvie. It's fundamentally a test to find out Loki's current place in his emotional and psychological development. It is not maliciously intended, and it is not designed to harm Loki. On the contrary, the intent is clearly to help Loki begin to come to terms with the reality of who he is and the choices he has made.
In fact, the whole time this is happening, Mobius very purposefully strives to foster an environment where Loki knows that A.) Mobius sees him. Truly sees and knows him. B.) Despite knowing what Loki is and what he's done, Mobius loves him and regards him positively, and C.) nothing Loki can do or say will change that positive regard.
Loki, however, is super not used to receiving unconditional positive regard. He has no idea how to respond to it. He feels like it's a trick, like there's another shoe just waiting to drop. I related to him hardcore in this scene because that's exactly how I felt when my therapist presented me with unconditional positive regard for the first time. It's confusing and strange and difficult to believe at first. Especially because it sets the stage for honest self reflection and personal growth that can be incredibly painful.
Loki is not a perfectly innocent person. He has done a lot of really bad things and hurt a lot of people in his life. He has a lot of very deep seated trauma that has informed these actions, but he still made those choices and he needs to take responsibility for them. This is not a fun process. Mobius knows this is actually a really awful, sucky process. But he also knows that change and growth requires two things: acknowledgement that a change needs to be made and the expectation that change can and will occur when properly cultivated. Mobius clearly laying out the reality of Loki's actions and who he is in the Sacred Timeline is the first part of that equation, and his unflappable, unconditional positive regard towards Loki as a person despite knowing that reality cultivates an environment for the second part to flourish.
"By definition, it is essential in any helping relationship to have an anticipation for change. In the counseling relationship, that anticipation presents as Hope—an optimism that something good and positive will develop to bring about constructive change in the client's personality. Thus, unconditional positive regard means that the therapist has and shows overall acceptance of the client by setting aside their own personal opinions and biases. The main factor in unconditional positive regard is the ability to isolate behaviors from the person who displays them." (source)
Mobius is not Loki's therapist, but he does take on a therapeutic role in Loki's life. He shows Loki that he is fully aware of all of Loki's faults and mistakes. He's seen them over and over again and knows them by heart because it's his job. And in the face of all of that he looks at Loki and says that he doesn't see him as a villain. That he likes him anyway and believes that Loki has the potential to help him and what he believes is the cause of good. (Yes the TVA is corrupt, but neither of them know that at this point, and the fact that both Mobius and Loki believe this to be the side of good to varying degrees is important here)
Mobius maintains this regard throughout the series and his subsequent interactions with Loki and when talking about Loki to Ravonna and others, and it's a big part of why Loki so quickly trusts and feels comfortable around Mobius. I know some people say it's unrealistic how fast it was, but it made a lot of sense just based on my experience. I mean, after one (1) session with my therapist, I was 100% ride or die for him, and it was kind of absurd. But the feeling of being seen like that is so potent when you're starved for it, that extreme reactions to it make a lot of sense. And if anyone's starved for unconditional positive regard, it's Loki.
Mobius is only human though, and he's not perfect at this. Over the course of the series, it's clear that Mobius has emotionally invested a lot in his Loki, and he struggles to maintain a professional distance, though he usually is able to keep his head enough to give Loki that positive regard he needs. The only time we see this regard slip is in episode 4 when Mobius is feeling betrayed and jealous. In these moments, Mobius is unable to step back from his feelings enough to get into a headspace where he can separate Loki's actions from who he is. He calls Loki an asshole and a bad friend, and it comes from a place of hurt and jealousy. It's also what drives Loki into a defensive mode we haven't seen since episode 1. He's no longer receiving that unconditional positive regard from Mobius and he feels betrayed. He worries that maybe it was all an act in the first place and Mobius never really cared for him at all. For the first time, Loki feels like Mobius doesn't see the best in him anymore and it hurts.
Mobius' unconditional positive regard was genuine, though, and this is reinforced in the subsequent scenes where we see him act on his instinctual desire to assume the best of Loki and investigate his claims. We see it again when he returns to Loki and he reaffirms both his desire to trust Loki and his belief that Loki can be "whoever, whatever he wants to be, even someone good." At this point, Loki is able to accept it and no longer pushes back against Mobius' belief in Loki's goodness and that he "has within himself vast resources for self-understanding, for altering his self-concept, attitudes, and self-directed behavior." He's grown and begun to see himself in a more realistic and positive light and it's a direct result of the time Mobius has spent cultivating that relationship based on unconditional positive regard.
That's why their relationship feels so comfortable and satisfying. Unconditional positive regard isn't only a therapy principle. It's something everyone craves in a relationship. To be seen as you are, flaws and mistakes and quirks and all is terrifying and mortifying, but when that person then just smiles and says I love you anyway because you are not your mistakes and you are not your flaws and nothing you can ever do or say can change how I feel about you, the relief and joy and comfort is more than worth the discomfort. So I think the idea that Mobius can look at someone as deeply flawed, broken, and jaded as Loki and love him exactly as he is right there and then, eyes wide open and smiling, believing that beneath it all Loki has the potential to be good, gives us hope that someone could do the same for us. I know that's what Lokius does for me, at least. Mobius represents to me the ideal of unconditional positive regard, and having an image of what that looks like in the character of Mobius gives us the opportunity to apply it to ourselves when we may not get it elsewhere in our lives. And I, for one, think that's very sexy of him.
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ukiyokki · 4 years ago
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mars reads too much dreamnotfound fanfiction for their own good
a dreamnotfound fanfic recommendation list by your resident dumbass (me)
this took way to fucking long... i’m tired
below is a (very extensive) list dedicated to all my favorite dnf fics, ranging from quick one shots to 100k+ word monstrosities that devour the storage on my computer, forever incomplete masterpieces to ongoing works of art, you get the idea. i provided links for each fic/series for your reading pleasure. there will be no smutty/nsfw fics on this list, that’s just not my vibe lmao. this list goes in no particular order, and i’ll update it from time to time when i feel like it. now, without further ado, let us begin.
Heat Waves (complete) by tbhyourelame
(wtf else did you expect, looking at a dnf rec list?) amazingly well written, and while it’s not my favorite dnf fic it’s damn near close. in the midst of a brutal heatwave, a suffering dream comes to terms with the fact that he is desperately in love with his best friend. everything i could say about this fic has already been said by nearly everyone who’s read it, so if you haven’t yet caved into the hype, just go for it. you won’t be disappointed.
Gonna be around (completed) by georgescatcafe
(mc irl) my favorite dnf oneshot to date. just read it, i don’t wanna spoil for you :)
Inferno in the Sky (ongoing)by zairielon
(star wars au) an ongoing star wars au currently clocking in at almost 200k words. need I say more? everything about it absolutely slaps, each chapter is amazingly written, and it’s just good. also, can we just appreciate dream and tubbos dynamic in here? 10/10, amazing, must protecc. oh right, a summary: george, an exiled padawan turned engineer, must return to the jedi temple after attacks on it from an unknown assailant threaten the safety of himself and the other jedi.
Like Magic (ongoing) by KangarooKen, NotGra55 (Gra55)
(harry potter au) the unofficial official dnf harry potter au. we watch the young unlikely wizard pair grow up together throughout their years at hogwarts as they battle good old fashioned wizard racism. beautifully written, incredibly fun and suspenseful, and just an overall blast and a half.
GeorgeNotFound, Son of Poseidon, and the League of Minor Gods (ongoing) by Clichewho_69, Cygnvs, Trash_Kinggg
(percy jackson au) percy jackson au? check. “road trip” (technically quest but u get what i mean)? check. enemies to friends to lovers? check. this fic follows the plot of the lightning theif (albeit loosely), but everything is explained enough where you don’t have to read percy jackson to understand what’s going on. basically after moving to the usa, george gets taken to camp halfblood where he learns that a) gods exist. b) he’s the son of poseidon and c) he needs to prove that he didn’t steal zeus’s master bolt.
Protected (completed) by aenqua
(royalty/camelot au) my favorite piece of dnf media of all time. dubbed the official dnf camelot au, where dream is the heir to the throne and george is a servants son with a secret that couldp get him killed. these childhood friends grow up together and learn trust, love, and acceptance. (that summary did not justice to the masterpiece that is this fic) here’s the directors cut
The Hunter (completed) by HederEgo
(mc irl) a choose your own adventure fic with 13 different endings, where dream the hunter must kill george and stop him from beater the ender dragon. enough said.
The official dream team cowboy AU (series)(ongoing) by antsu_in_my_pantsu
(cowboy au) cowboys and outlaws horses and shit. and the big gay. it’s a cowboy au, what else did you expect? fucking yee haw (all seriousness this is a great read, i loved it so so so so much and i can’t wait for the final chapter to release).
This is a Drista moment, let's just accept it (completed) by Qekyo
dnf fic from drista pov. considering its unique perspective, it’s perfectly done. beautifully showcases a sibling relationship through drista and her memories/moments with dream, and it just works, y’a know? also drista supremacy.
Dear Dream (completed) by Qekyo
(wwii au) i don’t cry when watching/reading anything sad. translation: i’m a heartless bitch. however, this fic is the only exception. it caused me to cry so hard my mom walked in my room and asked if i was ok. ‘nuff said.
TECHNOlogical Wingman (completed) by Closeted_Bookworm
techno is the autocorrect ai on dreams phone, and he gains sentience. interesting concept, and the author fucking nailed it. great fic.
It Was Only a Fic (ongoing) by imagineitdear
dream starts reading a dnf fanfic (we’ve all been there buddy).
Teacher’s Pet (ongoing) by niyuha
(teacher au) in which dream is a high school english teacher and george is the new comp sci teacher in room 297.
Saltwater Secrets (ongoing) by earlgay_milktea
(mermaid/high school au) a great example of the shear amount of variety in fics this fandom has to offer. when i started reading dnf fics i would have never thought i’d find one about a mermaid george hopelessly crushing on his human friend, who happens to be his schools star swimmer. yet here i am, and i am far from disappointed.
Smash My Heart (incomplete) by dontrollthedice
george and sapnap are commentators for duper smash brothers tournaments, and george develops a crush on an up and coming smash streamer named dream.
roleplaying in the dark is harder than it seems (completed) by Alienu
laser tag. 10/10
solar system (completed) by quartzfia
(mc irl) george vists dream in pandora’s vault.
Ramblings of a Lunatic (completed) by jungkooksfic
ahh communicating through a notebook left on a shelf in a bookstore- what a perfect way to start a relationship.
Paint me like your French Girls (It's Charcoal, Actually) (completed) by Turtle_ier
(artist au) george is an art student, and dream is a model.
00:00:00 (completed) by isleofdreams
(soulmate au) 00:00:00 is the moment you meet your soulmate, as indicated but the clock ticking down on your wrist until the moment you meet. i’m not a fan of soulmate aus; this fic is the exception.
Blue Skies Smilin' At Me (completed) by kivy
(artist au) i don’t usually cry while reading stuff, but this brought me damn near close. george is a painting conservator and chats it is with the ghost of the artist if the painting he is working on. they fall in a love.
Current Location (incomplete) by hendollana
(influencer au) george simps for a hot american instagram model. who knew he’d actually follow back?
The Withering (series) (series ongoing, 1 work completed) by App1e_Juice
(mc irl) lore and world building and fight scenes and everything i crave. what’s not to love? something starts making the plants and crops around dreams village wither, and must team up with new friends to find the cause of the mysterious disease plaguing the land.
Minecraft, But You Can't Leave (complete) by facadecake
(mc irl) dream and george are sucked into their own private minecraft world together and must beat the game to escape.
Free The Game, Beat the End (incomplete) by goatgoatwasfound
(mc irl) a glitch in minecraft causes thousands of players from around the world to be trapped inside minecraft, with only one way of escape- beating the ender dragon. first dnf fic i ever read, and it’s still 10/10 for me.
Why don't you come a little closer? (completed) by lifeofandoms
george gets stood up by a date, and Dream pretends he’s the date to save george from the embarrassment. simply adorable.
lightning bug (completed) by saintachesP
(band au) while on tour, dream realizes his feeling for george.
Hold me closer (completed) by Treesofmyheart
(mc irl/dsmp) i just,, really like this trope.
Dizzy on caffeine (completed) by GleamingGreenGoggles
(coffee shop au) best dnf coffeeshop au i’ve read. periodt.
living a life of crime isn’t always easy (series) (completed) by itisjosh
(mafia/assassin au) stockholm syndrome except it’s not weird.
Inhibitions Make Interesting Situations (completed) by Ship_On_The_Sea
i pissed myself laughing. it’s just a dream and george being hilariously dense, flustered idiots. serotonin central.
thy eternal summer shall not fade (completed) by gracequills
(high school au) that moment when you recite shakespeare to your crush in your ap lit class instead of confessing (hate it when that happens).
All is Fair in love and Football (ongoing) by graciegirl2001
(college au) #1 favorite college au. in which george is a cheerleader, and dream is the football teams rising star player. this one gets extra points because of the amazing karlnap moments sprinkled throughout. *chefs kisses air*
online love (completed) by andbutso
(high school au) online classes go zoooooooom
Can’t help falling (completed) by isleofdreams
dream re-learns the guitar to sing to george on his birthday. beautiful. fluffy. amazing
dance in the rain and my arms (completed) by lazy_kitkat
george is a rain god, and dream is a wind god
Weather Boy (completed) by DaintyDiizzle
wouldn't you like to know, weather boy? (where dream can control the rain)
The color orange (completed) by anon
(mc irl) dream describes the colors of a sunset
Family Mode (completed)by Strawberry_flavoured_tears
they’re dads :,)
Breathing Room (incomplete) by papercranes
(band an) an amazing band au. the mad lad author wrote original songs for each chapter. above and beyond, mad props :). unfortunately, it’s incomplete
Piece of Clay (completed) by carbonbrine
(artist au) george is a sculptor and his sculpture comes to life- but oh no he’s hot.
Try (completed) by Not4typicalwriter
(royalty au) george must choose a suitor, but none of them are up to dream, his head knights, standards. or dream is hella jelly. also protective dream is perfect
When the Roses Bloom (completed) by HederEgo
(royalty au) close second for my favorite fic. go to royalty au for a quick serotonin bost. it’s all fluff and flowers and crushes, and i love it. criminally underrated.
Heavenstruck (ongoing) by dontrollthedice
george is dreams guardian angel, and dream want to find out more about him and his past life. bittersweet :,)
Bang and Burn (completed) by App1e_Juice
(spy au) george accidentally falls for target number 1 on sapnap’s secret agency’s hit list. this ones great, i love me a spy au :)
Can I get a uhh… (completed) by lemonskies
dream keeps pulling up to the drive through mcdonald’s that george works at drunk.
Pretty Stranger (completed) by anon
when looking for dream in the terminal, george sees a cute guy and decides to flirt.
Take my Hand (completed) by latinbias
(royalty au) another royalty au? poggers. surprise twists? double poggers. love this a lot.
seconds, minutes, hours, lifetimes (complete) by meridies
ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP *inhales to compose herself* roadtrip au. unrequited love, ignored feelings, longing, pining, you know the drill. absolutely love this one, its the best roadtrip au i have ever read, in any fandom. (maybe cause i identify with it a little too much, but thats not important. whats important is that you read this fic. right now. im waiting).
Message redacted (complete) by justyouraverageloser
(text fic) dream asks for a girls number and realises hes been given the wrong number. however, an unexpected relationship starts to form between him and the stranger on the other end of the line.
the waves (completed) by anon
(mc irl) this fic was written by the same anon who wrote the color orange, which is up there on my fav dnf oneshot list. dream and george know they have a higher purpose. they don’t know where they came from, or why they are seemingly the only humans in the world, or how they feel about eachother, or even where the skeletons come from, but they are sure of one thing: they have to beat a dragon.
The Dream Doll (completed) by PeppDream (Pep_Pizza)
(voodoo i guess) i’m a real big fan of fics with really out there or unique concepts, so naturally this one makes the cut! i really liked it, it’s really sweet and made me think a lot about what matters to me in the world. george finds a strange doll in an antique shop, and would really like to just stuff it in a drawer and forget about it. sadly (?), the doll has other plans.
last updated February 6th, 2021
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pwarkluv · 3 years ago
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❝ idk you yet ❞ - p.js
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park jisung x reader | angsty, fluff | 1.6k words 
WARNINGS | TW: mentions blood, abuse, drug and alcohol abuse, smoking, lowercase au, non-idol au, high school au, badboy!jisung, mature language/cursing, reader is like an angel sent from heaven for him, jisungie just in need of love :(
SUMMARY | being an outcast has him wondering if he’ll ever be happy. cue you, the new girl, stumbling into his life (literally).
AUTHOR’S NOTE | inspired by the song “idk you yet” by alexander23! also AHHH this is my 100 followers special fic :) THANK U LOVES FOR 100 IM SO SHOCKED CJSBFKEJD <33 the writing is a little crappy because i’m currently on my period and my patience for sitting down and writing this went down halfway through lol but I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, ENJOY THIS JISUNG FIC BC JISUNG MY BABIE AND SO ARE YOU GUYS!
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whenever anybody thinks of park jisung, they think of the chains and dark clothing he wears. they think about the faint smell of smoke and men’s cologne that follows him wherever he goes. 
they think of the boy who grew up on the wrong side of the tracks. 
but what they don’t think about are bruises on his face he fails to hide whenever he walks into school, the dejected look on his face whenever random people give him disapproving looks, the way his smile slowly faded into a permanent frown wherever he went. 
jisung quickly accepted his reputation at school and in their little town, not having enough energy to feel insecure about it like before.
the only group of people that even remotely cared about the boy were his best friends in the whole entire world, nct dream.
they were outcasts just like him, the most “fucked up group of boys” in their town (the people’s words, not theirs).
see, they were your typical bad boy group straight out of your typical fanfic. bad grades, smoking in their free time, getting into fights, always being late to class; not a single person had hope in them.
but behind their scary and intimidating facade, all seven boys were big softies with misunderstood hearts and difficult backgrounds.
people were just too dense to look into it, only judging them based on their looks and personality on the outside. 
❝ how can you miss someone you’ve never met ❞
love was a foreign thing to jisung, the only form of love he’s ever felt being from his friends. his parents were… interesting to say the least. 
jisung’s father was a hard-core alcoholic, his mother being a major druggie. with no siblings in the house, jisung was usually their main target to push around and beat up.
and so because of this at a young age jisung learned to distance himself from other people and found different ways to release stress.
he started smoking when he was 14, the warm and hazy feeling of the smoke entering his lungs comforting him.
if jisung humored himself enough, maybe smoking could count as his first love. it was always there for him, never leaving him alone even if he wanted to quit. 
he relied on it knowing it was the only constant in his life. 
now of course the boy has heard of proper love, love like in the movies or shitty romance songs he hears on the radio.
and he won’t lie, there were moments he thought about what it felt like to be in love. but he knew that would never happen, at least not in their small town anyways. 
he just wanted to be loved. 
jisung would never admit it but sometimes he’d be jealous of the old couples walking down the street in their own world like it was just them two against the universe. he was jealous of the happy kids running around, their mother’s and father’s fondly smiling at their child. he was jealous of all the “normal” kids in his neighborhood. 
jisung wanted that, craved that. 
but most importantly, the boy wanted love.
❝ cause i need you now but i don’t know you yet ❞
everything hurt. 
his head, his body, his mind, his heart; everything was in pain.
jisung walked down the empty streets of their city, a trail of blood following behind him as he accepted his fate. the boy was 99% sure he had a concussion and at the very least had a few broken ribs. 
he felt like this was the end, and he was ready.
-
wandering aimlessly around town, you decided to take a late night walk to familiarize yourself around the area. you had just moved into the city a week ago, spending all seven days trying to help your family unpack and rearrange your cozy new home. 
now that you were finally free of the smell of tape and the dust of the boxes, you decided it was best to get to know the place you were living in. 
the autumn air seemed to settle at night as you shivered, cursing yourself for not bringing a jacket of some sort. the sight of a convenience store up ahead of you brought you relief as you rummaged through your pockets wondering if you had enough money for ramen.
your steps became excited as you found a couple dollars, fondly thinking about what type of ramen you should buy. you became so lost in your thoughts you didn’t even notice the poor boy who was staggering in front of you, or the trail of blood he left behind. 
-
jisung pushed himself to reach the convenience store a couple feet away from him, in desperate need of supplies to at least try and fix himself. 
if it didn’t help in any way then oh well, maybe death was indeed an option. 
grinding his teeth though the pain, he did not expect to feel a small body bump into him. had he been at his regular health, jisung would’ve easily been able to keep still but because of how much blood he was losing the boy was knocked down like a bowling pin.
“holy fuck.” jisung cursed the feeling of the concrete floor colliding with his ribs. he didn’t even notice the girl who had bumped into him sitting on the floor dumbfounded, freaking out over his state.
“oh my fucking god.” the girl said, capturing his attention. jisung glared at the stranger, mentally acknowledging the fact she was pretty. 
but her being pretty won’t get you anywhere, he scolded himself. she’ll leave you just like everyone else.
“a-are you okay?” she said, eyes glancing at his black eye. jisung rolled his eyes, already annoyed. “does it look like i’m okay?” he replied, his deep voice catching the girl off guard. 
“just, fuck off.” jisung said closing his eyes as he laid back down on the floor, knowing he couldn’t force himself to get up anymore. he didn’t even have to open his eyes to know she left, hearing the sound of her footsteps walk away.
the boy sighed as he laid idly on the floor, wondering what sin he committed to lead him to where he is now. not even she wanted to stay, the tears threatening to fall as his thoughts buried him alive.
“why can’t i just die?” jisung said out loud, asking no one but himself.
“because i won’t let you.” a voice replied as jisung forced himself to sit up in confusion. it was the same girl he had bumped into, but this time she had a first aid kit with her. he gave her a lost look despite knowing what she was here to do. 
jisung’s mind just couldn’t wrap around the fact that a total stranger would even bother to help him. 
“now sit up.” she said softly as she bent down to open the box, the boy slowly followed her instructions. “i’m sorry this might sting.” she said though jisung didn’t mind because she was much prettier up close.
-
the next ten minutes were you trying to fix his wounds against the shitty chairs outside the convenience store.
jisung didn’t even bother mentioning his broken ribs, not wanting you to freak out. you cleaned up what you could and the boy was beyond grateful for that.
you subconsciously rubbed his back in a comforting way whenever you’d apply alcohol to his open wounds, trying to ease the sting. you held his hand for him to hold and though he was a big boy and had a high pain tolerance, he still gave it a squeeze just to keep your hand there.  what the actual fuck is this feeling, jisung asked himself as he watched your determined figure work on him.
it was cold and in order to better work on his wounds, the boy offered to give you his hoodie which strangely had no traces of blood on it. you gladly accepted, the faint smell of blood and his cologne engulfing you up. 
the sight of you in something so big and so him made his chest swell in pride.
jisung couldn’t even formulate a sentence as you cursed at the time once you finished patching him up, fleeing the scene before he could say anything with a small smile, his hoodie still on. 
❝ and can you find me soon because i’m in my head ❞
the thought of your soft hands on his, your voice, your whole presence; everything about you couldn’t seem to leave the poor boy’s mind. it was now monday, and waiting for his class to start already made him want to go home.
if only i got her name, jisung daydreamed with his head resting on the palm of his hand. the classroom was loud and bright, people occasionally giving him looks but the boy didn’t mind. 
“jisungie~ did you hear we have a new kid?” jaemin asked, poking the boy’s cheeks. the boy only gave him a pointed look before sighing. 
“hyung i don’t really care.” jisung replied, looking back out the window. 
jaemin only gave him an offended look before grumbling a bit. “i don’t know maybe you will.” he muttered under his breath as their teacher walked into the room. 
❝ yeah i need you now but i don’t know you yet ❞
their homeroom teacher stood in front of the class, jisung tuning out his voice. the boy once again sighed as his teacher called for their attention, explaining they had a new girl in their class. “now make her feel welcomed,” he said before turning towards the door.
“y/n, please come in.” the teacher said and jisung almost fell out of his seat when he saw you walking through the door with the same smile you gave him a couple days ago.
“hi i’m y/n and i hope we can get along.” you bowed to the class, a familiar hoodie you were wearing catching his attention. 
isn’t that mine, jisung thought to himself as he bit back a smile knowing you kept it all along. 
457 notes · View notes
delicrieux · 4 years ago
Text
—MAKE YOU SAY “OH” EXTRAS: TINDER
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extra meaning non-canonical occurrence; can be placed anywhere in the “make you say oh” timeline after couple (cha. 14) and before the final “oh”. 
pairing—corpse husband x f!reader warnings—tinder profiles, tw: men, swearing.  word count—2.6k. format— written. ─── ❥ req by nonnie​:  y/n makes a youtube vid/live stream where she's just swiping through her tinder acc and corpse literally blocks her lmao
author’s note—akldsljfs this was such a funny idea i could not not write it lmao
ultimate masterlist. myso masterlist
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You have pulled the biggest brain move by setting up both a facecam and a screen recorder on your phone. All is beautifully displayed and visible during the stream. Your fanbase is particularly intrigued on what exactly are you planning on doing today, seeing as your tweet of “strea” had been a bit vague, if not downright ominous. No emojis. No elaboration. You couldn’t even be bothered to finish the word. Truly, a mystery. Everyone tuned in and are currently waiting with bated breath.
A few of your fans must sense upcoming doom because the overall mood in the chat turns from optimistically intrigued to...evil. It’s an entity all on it’s own now, clawing at you through the screen with various renditions of laughter and devil emojis. A few eggplants thrown in there for good measure, accompanied, naturally, by the scandalous water drops. At first the common consensus is that you’re biting the bullet and going through your camera roll on stream. Definitely an idea worth considering, though you frankly don’t know what lies at the start of the 11k photograph journey, and you are afraid to check in public. Could be a harmless meme, could be a salacious pic you had saved of an OF star. It’s really a gamble. Either way, you would definitely get banned. You might still get banned. Why do you insist on doing shit like this?
Because it’s funny. Because you’re kinda stupid. Because it’s just so absolutely laughably easy to do.
A smile quirks your lips, and while it is not explicitly smug, the look in your eyes sure is, “Greetings,” You utter lowly, dimming the lights--the budget for this stream! Ugh, you went all out, “my children.”
mother i crave violence
sensing evil energy rn!!
i do not claim the energy in this video for myself or anyone else watching this 💖💖
^with peace and love shut the fuck up
“I know y’all lowkey hoes-” Upon your words the chat splits into two: one side eagerly agrees (even shares a few OF accounts! How helpful, supporting small businesses!), whilst the other feverishly insists on innocence. You make a face stuck somewhere between offended and bewildered, “Now c'mon now-I know you. I know you all. We’re the same, don’t-what was that?”
You try to scroll back to the comment but it’s loss in the sea of incoming messages, “I swear to God I just saw-”
Corpse_Husband: i love late night streams it’s not like i have anything better to do.
“COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORPSE!!!!” 
rip headphone users
i cant feel my face when im with you by the weeknd but instead of face its my fucking ears
yall think full vol on pc is better?my parents woke up 😭😭😭😭
To think he’s spending his last waking moments for today with watching you (he probably still would have anyway, because you do not posses an ounce of shame or self-control and pester him relentlessly)! It makes your heart sing, and suddenly, a traitorous, fun hating idea barges it’s way through the crowd of incoherent buzzing and states: don’t do this. For some reason it also has the voice of Rae. As if that would work in guilt-tripping you- Rae never succeed, and her fictitious rendition in mind won’t fare much better either.
Still, you thought about it. That must count for something. Corpse will understand, won’t he? Why don’t you want to upset it in the first place? Men look so funny when they lose their shit, like hello, don’t you have anything better to do? But the image of Corpse just sitting there, hurt, distraught, leaving you on seen because he’s in his sad boy hours leaves a sour taste in your mouth. 
queen rly went from  🥺😊 to 😕 u ok bbgirl?
Corpse_Husband: no pouts cutie
akjdjoeijdfse cUTIE??? deadass boutta r.i.p.
Well that succeeded in eliminating everything from mind, doubts included. If this was an anime, the scenery would shift into something roseate, with flowers and bubbles and sparkles all around you along with a halo or two. Alas, not an anime, rather reality. The led-lights, however, seemingly possessing a will of their own, slowly turn from deep violet to pink. You smile brightly, like the absolute dumbass you are, and you are met with a ray of heart and blushing emojis. You are just so cute, a real cutie! Still in your disguise adorable state, you swipe your finger on your phone screen, the grin never leaving your lips.
There, among the plethora of apps, nestled sits a red square with a white fire plastered on it. The delicate calligraphy on the bottom reads: TINDER.
The mood changes once again- you’re giving the roaches emotional instability by how quickly everything flips over- and the chat spams eggplants vigorously; some, of course, bravely fight against the thirst.
nooooooo i thought y/n is gonna stream in a god honoring way!!!
^pack it up girl defined
“So, Charlie and I-” You note a few awfully curious comments and squint, “-yes, we talk a lot. Charlie is a really good friend of mine. We’re best friends. Brothers. Sisters. Cousins. The whole fucking family tree-no, that sounds weird. Delete. Anyway, Charlie, being the absolute fucker he is, said, hey, you know what would be funny? And I was like, nooo, what would be funny, Charlie? And he says to me, he says, says, making fun of men on Tinder. And if y’all need any more proof that Charlie and I are platonic soulmates, then dunno, my children, my roaches, I dunno-I dunno what more to give you.”
You can’t be bothered reading the comments, there’s too damn many. You also need to save your reading comprehension for the actual bios. It has a time limit, that darn thing. 
“Okay, so I made a profile earlier, but I hadn’t swiped on anyone yet-” Despite the fact, Tinder helpfully informs you that already 99+ people have swiped right on you, “So, this is me,” You show the pictures you have of yourself, and damn, not to be a conceited narcissist, but you look really good. Like if you saw yourself on Tinder, you’d super like instantly. “Uhm, so, my bio-my bio says: let’s sauce in the tub together, ya dig? splishy splashy, giggle giggle.” 
i cant believe we are witnessing y/n trying to form a coherent sentence live 
shes trying give her time
ya dig??? y not capeesh
what scene from the godfather is this lol?
“My anthem, is,” You laugh, covering your lips with your hand, “Corpsie, this is form you-” Proudly, you show that indeed, Corpse’s E-GIRLS ARE RUINING MY FUCKING LIFE is listed as your anthem on Spotify, “Hehe.” Yes, you say that aloud.
Corpse_Husband: you’re killing me Corpse_Husband: thanks baby Corpse_Husband: now delete tinder ❤︎
You ignore his last quip, deciding it’s finally time to get this show on the road, “Right, let’s do this shit. I’m not actually going to swipe on any guys that look, uh, decent? Yuck, can’t believe I just said that, uhm, because I-because I feel like some actually deserve a chance with someone? I don’t wanna get anyone’s hopes up, as I am currently in a long distance relationship with Chrollo. So I’m just gonna swipe on, like, frat boy assholes. Because I don’t care if I hurt their feelings. Quite frankly I don’t think they possess them in the first place.”
The chat voices their agreements. With the ground rules set, you, giddy, click on the first profile.
Does Tinder know what you’re doing, your plan? The FBI agent watching you through your phone must be working overtime, bless his heart. They must, because the the first guy to meet you is named Jason, and there he is, blond hair and blue eyes, holding up a fish the size of his torso. Marginally adequate in looks, pretty good muscles. A solid 7 bordering on 8. He’s the same age as you, 15 miles away, and he studies at some college you don’t care enough to look up. Bio reads:
I like to drive fast. Fishing is my passion, but if you can’t catch me by the ocean, you’ll catch me catching waves, bro! Love a good gym date. You do squats, and I’ll keep a close eye to make sure you’re doing it correctly ;) You probably saw me at a party. Leader of the The Phi Kappa Psi. I’m a Gemini, if that matters lol.
You, of course, read it aloud, dramatically; provide some constructive criticism-he seems nice, but he’s a Gemini, so naturally, you can’t trust him at all! Also, that gym date session leaves little to be desired. With your rant done, you swipe right, and shocker! (not), it’s an instant match.
“Okie, I still wanna swipe of some profiles, so I’ll see what he’ll text later-” For a second you wonder the legalities of this stream, but you’re having too much fun to think of it further, “guys, I won't get sued, right?”
NOW she considers it
well....
if you do, we’ll kickstart your lawyer dw <3
Onto the next profile. Kevin, 25, is seen fixing his car- or, you assume he’s mid-fixing it, you don’t really know why else he’d hold a wrench and be covered in oil. He’s shirtless, and the caveman part of your brain echoes something closely resembling AWOOOGA!, but...but!...blonde hair, blue eyes. You pout again, “I don’t...I don’t really like blond boys, ya know? With the blue eyes and all, it’s just not my thing, uhm, unless it’s like-like...Armin from Attack on Titan. Else I don’t care.”
Onto the bio:
You have to treat a car like you treat a woman: go on long rides, take the lead, but most importantly, keep her oiled up 😜 
“What the fuck did I just read?”
The chat is equally confused. You swipe right anyway- another match. Too easy.
The stream continues without incident for a solid thirty minutes- all of your matches, expect a few that genuinely looked like normal dudes that really couldn’t write a decent bio to save their lives, had been blond hair blue eyed gym rats with ranging forms of misogyny. Some opened with asking for nudes out right, some asked about your day first before asking for nudes. You prefer the former. Straight to the point! You admire the gall. 
But then, down the forty-five minute mark a profile popped up that made you still by your phone, your smile dying as your eyes bulged. Dear God. Lord in heaven. Who is this demonspiit lookalike and why is he so fucking hot? The neck tats, the skateboard, the clothes- holy shit, you gotta close your mouth before some drool dribbles out.
No bio, just his name, Tyler, and that he’s 23.
“He boutta be 23 in me.” You mutter, swiping right with lightning speed.
WHAT DID SHE SAYYYYY?????????
tyler is y/ns karma for relentlessly mocking that one guy that had a whole ass list on what his “female” partner should be
^he deserved it and also tyler seems like a typical fuckboi y/n grow a braincell
look at mom 🥺 her eyes are sparkling
It wasn’t a match right away. You somehow expected as much, but it still upset you. Simp behavior, pathetic. The stream continued bravely, and when Tyler messaged you a simple “yo” you totally didn’t sequel. You didn’t manage to text him back on stream: texting all those guys that you didn’t really find all that attractive was easy, but this...You’re a sucker for a man who radiates red flag energy. His whole profile is a red flag. He might just be a red flag himself.
What can you do? Suddenly becoming color blind is not easy. Once the stream ends, you unmatch with everyone expect Tyler. He you chat with for a bit, but a sudden craving for different company makes you abandon him, too. You don’t feel too heartbroken for him- you’re certain there’s already too many girls in his dms. You wish them luck.
Happily, you delete Tinder. You go to Twitter, notice you’re trending again- look at you go! Queen shit- and as you compose a thank you tweet, something strange happens. You go to text Corpse, but when you click on his profile you grow cold.
YOU’RE BLOCKED. You can’t follow or see @/Corpse_Husband ‘s Tweets. 
...Pardon? You hop onto Instragram and-also blocked. Seriously? And you thought you’re one petty bitch. Corpse is seriously prissy about everything. Damn, if he didn’t like your stream, he could’ve just said so. Didn’t need to, like, block you from his internet existence. So not cool.
You try texting him but no text go through. Well how will you let him know you deleted Tinder just like he asked? You relieve your frustrations by punching your pillow a few times. Later, you apologize to her, you didn’t mean to hurt her, it’s not her, it’s you. Fuck, 5 minutes of exile and you’re already loosing your mind.
“Raeeeeeeeeeeee!” You whine loudly. It’s roughly 2am now, but you don’t care. You’re too heartbroken to care. There’s a thump from her room, but nothing else, “Raeeeeeeeee!!!” You wail, wallowing in self-pity on your bed. You hear a very loud, very annoyed sigh from her room, followed by angry marching. Your door is abruptly thrown open, and in the dim, colorful light you see her scowl.
“What?” She grits.
“Can you please tell Corpse to unblock me from everything?”
“What did you do now?”
“I made fun of men on Tinder.”
She pauses, “...That doesn’t sound so bad.” She surmises, voice laced with suspicion, “What else?”
“...There was one really hot guy that I kinda sorta talked to after--”
“Y/n.”
“-But I totally deleted Tinder and honestly he was pretty boring, so, like, uhm, please?”
She sighs, the servery of which implies she is holding the weight of the world on her shoulders, and instantly you know that you won. She taps away at her phone, “You owe me one.” She states, and before you can reply, she exits your room and slams the door behind her.
Grinning, you text his phone again. The message goes through, oh gosh, you’re so relieved you feel like crying. This has been, officially, the worst five minutes of your life.
You Y DID U BLOCK ME LOSER!!! MAJOR LOSER ALERT!! I DELETED EVERYTHING IT WAS A JOKE r u still mad at me? y u always mad at me i never do anything:(
my husband You’re my baby, how do you think I’ll react when I see you publicly simping for some asshole on Tinder?
Oh no, he used the words, he delivered the killing blow. You’re finished. Your heart can’t take such a workout. 
Not that you would ever admit it to him, though!
You hehe ur jellyyyy u always dis jealous hehe?
my husband Not jealous.
Yeah, you might not be the brightest tool in the shed, but even you know that’s a lie. You send him an array of kissy emojis that he doesn’t have the decency to reply to. Then, completely unprompted and dead serious, you send him a simple voice memo, saying: “You really have nothing to worry about, you know? You’re my favorite, Corpsie.”
He responds via text, reiterating that he’s not fucking jealous and that he just doesn’t like when you show such outward interest in anyone but it’s not like he cares or anything. It’s just really, like, weeeeird to see his baby simping for another man like that totally ruins the whole dynamic!!! It was only natural that he should block you on every social media platform, including his personal number (which, like, was completely necessary! Doesn’t matter that his viewers can’t see it, it’s gotta be super believable!), and inform his followers of that, because it’s all a joke, like, for the dynamic, that Youtube grind, you know? Ya dig? No personal feelings were involved at all. He totally wasn’t upset that you found someone else cute, no way!
my husband I’m not jealous. Lol.
You ik u repeated tht like 50 times  u trynna convince me or??? lmao
my husband No comment. ...You don’t actually talk to anyone else like we’re talking, right?
You no one else calls me their baby if thts wat ur wondering at least not to my knowledge lol im all urs
my husband That makes me very happy to hear:)
Yeah, it makes you very happy, too.
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hope you liked it!! xx
953 notes · View notes
bitsandbobsofwriting · 3 years ago
Text
The God of Magic just wants humanity to be happy and thriving;
Version 1, Good!Merlin
INTRO
(Version 2, Dark!Merlin)
~
“You’re late.”
From their place in the bushes, the gang can see a wide grin break out on the woman’s face as she raises an eyebrow:
“You’re always getting distracted by pretty flowers or interesting conversations, how was I supposed to know that you’d be on time for once?”
Her voice somehow sounds like an ocean in a storm, ear-splittingly loud as the sound cuts right through them to the core, but also a gentle stream, soft and clear and soul-cleansing. The gang struggle not to flinch in their confusion.
Merlin chuckles slightly, shaking his head as he softly replies:
“Ah, I see, you were expecting me to be late, so you told me to turn up half a candle-mark before you intended to get here.”
She raises an eyebrow and nods:
“In the hopes I wouldn’t have to stand around and wait too long,-”
She shudders slightly as her face falls, though she manages to look beautifully intimidating even with a slight scowl on her face:
“-you know how much I hate it up here, on dry land.”
Merlin nods. He looks around him passingly, and the gang tense as his eyes rove over their hiding place; their fear is quickly replaced with shock (and even more confusion) as it strikes them that they’ve never seen Merlin look so relaxed, so at ease. He finally looks back to the woman:
“Hmm. I may not agree with you on that, but I understand. I could have met you at Avalon, you know.”
The woman frowns even more, and the gang can see Merlin tilt his head in question, even more so when she replies:
“I... wanted this conversation to be private, away from the prying eyes and ears of Mother and our Siblings.”
Merlin’s shoulders tense, and Arthur can vaguely see the outline of his hands clenching tightly in his pockets as his cloak billows in a sudden wind. The knights, Gwen, and Morgana all look to each other in confusion, Merlin had never spoken of siblings before, in fact, they’re fairly certain he specifically told them that he’s an only child. This woman was so drastically different from Merlin in appearance, they couldn’t possibly be related by blood. Perhaps she means "siblings" in a similar sense to how the knights are brothers?
A tense silence passes between the two, but it’s quickly broken by Merlin letting out a deep, bone-weary sigh, his relaxed demeanour completely dissolved, and looking to the floor, mumbling:
“What’s this about, Ava?”
The woman, Ava, the gang now know, lets out a sigh of her own, tilting her head and waiting for Merlin to look at her again before speaking, her voice sounding more consistently soft the more she spoke, as if she needed practice to regulate her volume:
“I think you know, Em.-”
(”Em?? I guess that could be a shortened version of ‘Merlin’, but... not really.”)
“-Time is running out, existence is threadbare as it is, and only getting worse with each passing day. The world is splitting, cracking down the middle; magic is running thin-”
Everyone feels Arthur tense at the mention of magic, even more so at Merlin’s non-reaction to the word. Though everyone is already understandably on edge by the way the woman speaks as if the world is ending around them, and they hadn’t even noticed:
“-and we are starving. The fates of The Bane-”
Mordred manages to stop himself falling backwards, but his sudden shaky breath earns him a concerned glance from Gwaine, crouched besides him:
“-and The Darkness have been avoided, if you do not move forward now, then when? With every day you stall, you plan, you stand idly by and wait, we choke on the gaping emptiness of a world that is leaking.-”
Merlin holds up a shaking hand to stop her, his other running through his hair in frustration as he murmurs:
“I know, I know-”
The gang watches with tense, morbid curiosity as Ava cuts him off, her expression both annoyed and sympathetic:
“I don’t think you do, Em. You haven’t been home in years. Could you stand it? To be God of Magic with no Magic to be God over? No universe to hold dominion over?”
Merlin scoffs slightly and walks to the side in his frustration, and the gang can see the melancholy annoyance on his face, plain as day. It’s almost enough to make them forget that he visited Ealdor just last month. It’s definitely not enough to distract them from the fact that she had called Merlin a God. The God of Magic, of all things. What the fuck??:
“I don’t hold dominion over anything I just... am.”
Ava rolls her eyes:
“That’s not the point and you know it. Mother sent you to fix the problem, to stop the purge, to encourage the Once and Future King to bring magic back and start the Golden Age. He has been King for years, but you still act as a servant. You are a God, Em, assert yourself. You could fix the world with a click of your fingers, but you wait for the humans to do it for you.-”
Merlin interrupts her slightly impassioned speech with a deep huff and a shake of the head. From where he now stands, the gang have a healthy view of his side profile, and they can see the emotions warring on his face: frustration, grief, desperation:
“That isn’t... that’s not what I’m doing-”
She rolls her eyes again and the gang are vaguely aware of a distant crack of thunder as she gestures sharply with her hands:
“That is what you’re doing. You’ve become too attached to these... mortals.-”
She steps towards him, cradling his cheek in a soft, elegant hand as her face morphs to one of complete and utter sorrow:
“-You’re setting yourself up for heartbreak, Brother. Human lifespans, the lifespan of your precious Golden King, are but a blink of an eye compared to ours; they will all wither and die and fade from you, and you will be left with your grief forever.-”
Her other hand lifts to settle comfortingly on his shoulder, and the gang can see a single tear slip from Merlin’s lowered eyes:
“-Do what you came here to do, and come home, to Avalon, we miss you, Em, the family needs you back.”
Merlin stills for a few moments at her desperate plea, but then steps back, shrugging her hands off gently and wiping the tear from his face:
“No. I... I’m doing this properly. Mother understands my fondness for humanity, that’s why she sent me, and I’m going to do it properly.”
Ava huffs out a gentle laugh at his determined expression, shaking her head slightly in fond disbelief:
“How can you love them? These... humans, when they slaughter your creations, when they don’t even know what you are?”
Merlin smiles softly, his eyes gazing into the trees as he quietly responds, his voice full of enough adoration to take the gang's breath away, to temper the twinge of fear and betrayal that had been swelling in Arthur’s lungs:
"I love them because they don't know what I am. It's nice, to be human; to walk among them, being loved and hated and respected and touched as if I were not more than they could ever possibly comprehend. Humanity is... made of juxtapositions. Their existence is contradiction upon contradiction, weaved together and held with emotions so large I can scarcely understand how they're contained in such little bodies. I've been alive and watching them for millennia, lived side-by-side with them for almost three decades, and they still surprise me. To walk among them, to see them come to terms with this universe that We made for them, to see how desperately they crave knowledge, exploration, experience... it's beautiful. The way they love so fully, the way they find meaning and importance in every grain of sand, every ray of sun, every tuft of fur on every creature, it's humbling. It's astounding."
Ava has a soft smile on her face, looking as if she could listen to her Brother ramble about his love for humanity for decades. She shakes her head slightly, letting out a gentle sigh as she asks:
"Then why won't you save them? The Gods will starve without magic, but humanity will starve without the Gods."
Merlin pauses for a moment, his face scrunched in concentration as he tries to think of the right way to verbalize his thoughts. 
The gang stare on in unconcealed bafflement; the realisation that Merlin is some kind of God brings less fear or anger than they think it should. Maybe it’s the shock, or maybe it’s the reverent way he speaks about them. Either way, they stay still and silent in their hiding place, and eventually Merlin’s face settles back into a soft smile as he looks to his Sister:
"I wish to see them save themselves, not because We need them to, but because they want to. Because their desperation to explore this universe will one day outweigh their misguided hatred of magic.-"
He nods decisively, repeating in a confident voice:
"-I wish to see them save themselves."
Ava sighs once more, stepping toward Merlin and putting her hand back on his shoulder:
“Your wishes may soon become... irrelevant. We’re dying, Emrys,-”
Arthur struggles to hold in a gasp at that. Emrys. He knows that name. Apparently it’s the name of a God, and not just some secret sorcerer who took a fancy to Camelot and deemed himself it’s protector. Lancelot’s eyes widen, though he manages to hide his shock well; no one else is focused on anyone else’s reactions, all internally freaking out. 
Mordred is pale and breathing shallowly, being the only one in the group who had already known the full truth. Percival looks to be in shock, he grew up with the stories of Emrys, but to learn that Emrys was a God? That Merlin was said God? Not what he was expecting out of this little trip. Gwaine, Gwen, Morgana, and Elyan look worried, seeming to have pushed aside their shock in favour of being concerned over Merlin’s safety and sorrow. Leon stares upon the scene with scholarly-looking curiosity, hiding his apprehension and shock well. Arthur’s expression is... unreadable. Ironically, the only person capable of knowing what he was thinking just from looking at him was currently having an incredibly terrifying conversation with someone who is also presumably some kind of God(dess). 
“-time is running out. I know that you don’t want to, but... it might be best to tell them the truth. You adore your humans because of their ability to love, do you not think they love you enough to forgive you your deceptions?”
Merlin clenches his jaw, and it’s the anguish on his face, paired with his almost-whispered words, that breaks their hearts:
“I... no. Just because I love them does not mean they love me back. I’m just a servant, Ava, I’ll never be important enough to be forgiven, God or not; I’ve lied to them for over ten years.”
She sighs, letting a tear of her own fall as she quietly responds:
“Emrys, you undervalue your worth, they don’t-”
“No. I don’t. You’re right, I have one life-time with them, with... with Arthur, and then I’ll lose them, and I’ll spend the rest of eternity grieving. I refuse to taint the already short time I have with them by having to watch them grow to hate me. I refuse.”
Merlin frowns as Ava rolls her eyes fondly, a victorious smirk on her face:
“If you would let me finish. They don’t hate you now, despite learning what they have just learnt, and you have yet to tell them of all you’ve done for them. Their love for you will only grow, Brother.”
Merlin tilts his head and raises an eyebrow. The gang take in a collective gasp at the realisation that she knows. And has likely known the whole time.
“What are you talking about?”
Ava’s smirk just grows, and she looks to the bushes the gang is hiding in, seeming to make direct eye-contact with a panicking Arthur as she speaks, he voice echoing unnaturally through the clearing:
“You can come out now.”
At her words, Merlin’s head whips around to stare at where she was looking. He opens his mind, allows his magic to stretch around him, and his skull is immediately full to burst with echoes of Mordred’s earlier, and ongoing, warnings, as well as the overwhelming presence of The (former) Darkness, The Once and Future King, and the others. He takes a stumbled step back, hand covering his mouth and tears spilling from his eyes as he becomes more and more convinced of... well... his time being tainted.
The gang stand and shuffle out of the bushes slowly, eyes trained on the floor and hands clasped in front of them tightly. It’s Merlin’s quiet, cracking “No...” that has them look up, paling at the absolute heartbreak on his face.
Lancelot and Gwaine give him weak, though genuine smiles, holding their hands out placatingly, but they halt their movements forward when Merlin just copies them pace for pace, moving away from them.
No one notices Ava rolling her eyes, not until she steps behind Merlin and puts a halting hand on his shoulder, stopping him from moving further away.
Merlin whips his head around, and another loud clap of thunder sounds out, much closer than the other one, quickly followed by a sudden downpour of frigid rain. The gang look to the sky in confusion, and Mordred desperately tries to reach Merlin through the mental link, offering comfort and reassurance; Merlin doesn’t seem to notice, the rain falling harder and harder as he almost fall to his knees, speaking in a desperate voice to his sister:
“Why... why would you... you know what this means. Why... why would you do this?! Ava?”
She rolls her eyes again, seeming to glow effervescently under the rivers of rainwater running down her face and over her clothes. She forces Merlin to turn and look at the gang, holding her hands on his shoulders to stop him from backing away (or collapsing in his grief) :
“Look at them, Em. Do they look angry to you? You should have some faith in the humans you claim to love so much. Look at them.”
Everyone in the gang gives Merlin varying levels of strained smiles; though Merlin, in his panic, is unable to tell that the strain is from concern and guilt, thinking that it was instead from hatred. He falls to his knees, his eyes shut tight enough to give him a headache and his hands clamped over his mouth in an effort to hold the sobs in.
Gwen and Morgana are the first to rush forwards, not paying the slightest bit of attention to Merlin’s... sister or the knights as they collapse to the floor in front of their friend, not sure whether to keep their distance or try to comfort the distraught man... God.
It’s his next choked sob that urges them to move once again, and the girls pull Merlin into a hug, tears of their own gathering at his agony. He freezes at first, then tries to pull away as lightening streaks across the sky, the violent bursts in sync with his choked breaths. When Gwen strokes a soft hand through his knotted hair, and Morgana pulls him further into her lap, muttering “We’re not leaving you, Merls, not ever, we love you.”, he relaxes slightly.
The thunder and lightening cease, but the rain still pours as Arthur stares over the pile of crying bodies to the woman, whose eyes seem to be growing brighter and brighter in the deluge. She stares right back at him, and The King jumps slightly when her voice echoes through her head, despite her still face:
“My brother has lost enough, please do not shatter his heart.”
Arthur nods once, before following Lancelot’s lead to the others, the rest of the knights not far behind them as Ava disappears. Whether she walked away without noticing or simply faded into the rain, no one knows, but no one really cares either. Soon enough, everyone is gathered around Merlin, stroking his back softly and whispering comforting promises over the sound of the rain. When Leon is the only one to notice Mordred’s eyes flash golden as he summons a shield above them, he simply shrugs his shoulders and refocuses his attention on muttering reassurances in Merlin’s head.
His breathing slows after a while, as does the rain, though everyone panics slightly when they see Morgana frown as she strokes the hair away from his face, revealing flushed cheeks and closed eyes. Mordred’s eyes flash golden once more as he presses a hand to his forehead, though no one lets the shock distract them for too long, latching on to his relieved tone:
“He’s just asleep, that would’ve taken a lot out of him. We should get him back to Gaius.”
The knights all stand, stretching and cracking joints to try and rid themselves of the cold stiffness that had settled in their soaked bones. Morgana stays on the floor, clutching at Merlin in her lap desperately, like he could slip away at any moment. When Arthur leans down to pick him up, she shoots him a glare, her own eyes glowing as the wind picks up once more, whipping through the clearing in an obvious warning. Arthur takes in a gasp, but shakes the surprise from his mind as he settles a soft hand on his sister’s shoulder:
“I... look, we’ll talk about this later, and I promise you’re going to be safe,-”
He glances up to an equally defensive looking Mordred:
“-all three of you, but Mordred’s right, we need to get him home and warmed up.”
Morgana hesitates for only a second, but the concern (and love) in her brother’s eyes sway her, and she nods, ever-so-carefully pulling her arms from around Merlin and helping Arthur get the younger (or... much much older) man situated in his arms before standing up.
~
The trek back to the castle is a fairly short one now they don’t have to worry about being quiet, and the rain has almost completely stopped by the time they make it to the citadel gates. It’s late, so the only people they come across are the occasional guard. But The King resolutely ignoring them as he carries his unconscious manservant through the corridors, his closest friends and advisors around him either openly crying or blinking away tears... well... it’s something that very much screams “DO NOT DISTURB US DO NOT SPEAK OF THIS IMMEDIATELY FORGET EVERYTHING YOU HAVE JUST SEEN”.
Elyan runs ahead to wake Gaius and warn him, so by the time everyone gets to the Physician’s chambers the fire is roaring, a patient pallet has been moved in front of the hearth, and Gaius himself is bustling around, preparing various concoctions and tinctures and blankets.
Merlin’s still shivering form is laid on the pallet, and Morgana shamelessly uses her magic to pull the heat closer and dry out his clothes. Mordred sits protectively close to the servant, one hand subconsciously close to his sword, the other resting on Merlin’s shoulder. Gwen settles between him an Morgana, and the knights figure that with her complete non-reaction to the magic... she probably already knew, she was smart like that. Gaius finally makes his way to Merlin’s side, tipping a gross smelling potion down his throat and running a hand through his hair, frowning worriedly down at his ward. 
Not a single word had been said since they entered through the castle gates, and Arthur is the first to break the silence, sitting on Merlin’s other side, opposite Morgana, and settling an almost accusing expression on his sister:
“You knew, didn’t you?”
She looks up at him, somehow appearing powerful and intimidating despite being soaked through and shivering:
“I knew he was... powerful, I didn’t know he was a God.”
Gaius’ head whips around quickly, and Arthur is surprised at the questioning horror on his face:
“A God?? There must be some mistake, Merlin is powerful yes but he’s not-”
Mordred’s quiet voice interrupts him, though he doesn’t look away from the unconscious man as his fingers twitch over so slightly closer to the hilt of his sword:
“I knew. Though if I’d known he felt so... if I’d known how he felt, I would have spoken to him about it sooner, I apologise.”
Everyone looks at the group’s youngest member in shock, almost speechless, but Gwaine stutters slightly before clearing his throat and trying again:
“So... that was real, Merlin is a fucking God.”
Mordred nods absent-mindedly, eyes flashing golden as he presses his hand to Merlin’s forehead once again, frowning. Arthur’s brow creases in concern and he leans closer to Merlin:
“What is it? Is he ok??”
Before Mordred can reply, Leon speaks up, his voice tired, but strong:
“If he’s some... powerful God, then why is he hurt in the first place? Shouldn’t he be able to resist any sort of injury or sickness??”
Mordred shakes his head, finally looking away from Merlin to gaze at the group surrounding him. He looks doubtful at first, but when he sees the genuine concern on everyone’s faces, especially from Gaius and Arthur, he sighs and speaks softly:
“It’s difficult to describe. Merlin could access the full range of his power and do anything, if he wanted, but it’s draining and complicated when stuck in a human body. He himself is a God, yes, but this form is still vulnerable and mortal; he can get injured, and sick, he can die, or at least the body can. Merlin tends to repair this body when that happens, instead of moving on. He... likes it here.”
Everyone nods, understanding at least a little, though Gaius and Lancelot look the most shell-shocked. The room goes silent once again, and Percival, sat on the floor against the end of Merlin’s pallet with Elyan and Gwaine, is the first to speak, his voice shaking and sorrowful:
“He really thinks so low of himself. He’s a God... and he was terrified of the thought of us hating him, as if such a thing were even possible.”
Gwaine curses under his breath and Leon restarts his slow pacing around the room before he stops suddenly, turning to face the others with a look of anger on his face:
“Well of course he thinks it’s bloody possible. He’s right, we treat him like a fucking servant even though he’s one of our dearest friends, and half of us talk about the evils of sorcery on a near constant basis. He’s the God of Magic, of course he’d think we would hate him.”
Everyone is taken aback at Leon’s rage, though no one can deny that what he’s said is true. Leon is... quietly protective of everyone in the group, and it’s a time like this that reminds all of them that he had known Merlin just as long as Arthur had, and definitely held a certain brotherly affection for the younger (uh... yeah, whatever) man.
The older knight sags slightly, seemingly realising how exhausted he is, and pulls a chair up next to Arthur before collapsing in it, head in his hands. Arthur pats him on the back a few times before looking back to Merlin’s now thankfully not-shivering form, taking in a deep breath and nodding his head decisively:
“Well, we’ll just have to show him that it isn’t possible. I... we need to show him that he’s... important to us. Loved.”
Morgana just raises her eyebrow at The King, but doesn’t say anything as Gaius mutters a tearful “My poor boy.” under his breath. Elyan stands from his place on the floor, moving to perch on a bench behind his sister and setting a comforting hand on her shoulder as he softly speaks:
“He needs to know that we want him to stay here, with us.”
Percival shakes his head slightly, looking conflicted:
“Wouldn’t that be... cruel? That woman... Ava, was right. We’ll all grow old and die and he’s a God, he’ll live forever and he’ll grieve. Isn’t asking him to stay selfish?”
No one has an answer, and the room grows silent, everyone stewing in their own tense thoughts, trying to weigh the pros and cons, trying to measure exactly how selfish they were willing to be when it came to Merlin.
~
The sun rising over the horizon and peaking through the uncovered windows is what wakes everyone (bar Merlin) from their fitful sleeps. All of them had been plagued with odd dreams and nightmares through the night, so despite their exhaustion, they were grateful to be awake.
No one said anything though, waking one by one and pacing briefly around the room in an attempt to cure themselves of the aches gained from falling asleep in such awkward positions.
It’s still incredibly early in the morning, so thankfully none of them are needed for at least two more candle marks, but it’s Lancelot who breaks the silence first, clearing his throat and looking down at his best friend:
“It wouldn’t be selfish.”
Arthur looks up to him, noting the bags under everyone’s eyes and the tear tracks no one had bothered to wipe away:
“What are you talking about?”
The knight runs a hand through his hair, sniffling slightly and taking a deep breath before he stares around the room, making sure everyone was awake and paying attention as he spoke:
“For us to tell him we want him to stay, it wouldn’t be selfish. You heard him, he loves it here, he’s desperate to stay, he loves us. He still has at least thirty years worth of memories to make with us, and yeah, maybe that’s not a lot in the grand scheme of the immortal life of a God, but it’s more than the ten he’s already got. We can’t take that away from him. He... he wants to be here. Telling him to leave just to alleviate our own guilt... that would be selfish.”
Everyone looks a little doubtful, bar Mordred, and it’s him that Arthur turns to:
“Mordred? You knew... what he is, which we are still definitely going to have a conversation about by the way, what do you think?”
Mordred sighs, biting his lip for a moment before finally ripping his gaze from Merlin’s still unconscious, but now healthier looking body:
“He is more than any of us will ever be able to comprehend. You still see him as just Merlin, he is, but he’s also much more; he is Emrys, the saviour, the God, the Guiding Light. He is magic itself, woven into the fabric of the universe. He inhabits every space, and no space at the same time, he exists in every grain of sand, every drop of ocean, every speck of sky. To... to assume that he is not capable of deciding what he wants is an act of unforgivable hubris. If he stays, who are you to demand he leave and name yourselves selfish, when he has not deemed it so?”
Arthur pales slightly at Mordred’s words, as does everyone else. Gwaine seems to be taking it in his stride, and Lancelot seems less surprised than Arthur thinks he should (definitely something to question, but not right now), but before anyone can say anything, Merlin twitches, a low groan escaping his throat as his brows crease.
Everyone moves quickly, gathering around his bedside in a huddle. Morgana, Mordred, and Gwen are grateful to still be sat in their seats, and if they weren’t so busy worriedly leaning over Merlin they would be rolling their eyes at the way the others were pushing and shoving to be at the front. Gaius elbows his way to be stood by Merlin’s head, a cold compress in one hand and a grey looking potion in the other.
Morgana strokes a hand through Merlin’s hair and the frown on his face eases; he blinks his eyes open, swallowing before grimacing at the taste in his mouth and groaning again. Gwen leans over his head, smiling as she settles a hand on his warm cheek:
“Morning sleepyhead. How are you feeling?”
Merlin just groans again, rubbing his shaking hands harshly into his eyes as he says, his voice dry and painful-sounding:
“Ugh. Like Arthur’s aim got miraculously better.”
Arthur rolls his eyes and flushes slightly, but before he can defend himself Merlin bolts upright, taking in a deep, ragged breath, eyes wide. Mordred focuses a concentrated expression on the side of Merlin’s head, but Arthur ignores it as he reaches forward, settling a hand on the dark-haired man’s shoulder and muttering his name:
“Merlin?”
Merlin’s breathing only gets deeper as he whips his head around to stare at Arthur. The blonde tries to smile comfortingly at him, but Merlin barely seems to notice as he scrambles back on the bed, only stopping when he comes into contact with Leon behind him.
Mordred’s face morphs into a concerned frown at Merlin’s terror, and now his tears, so instead of waiting for the man to calm down enough to let them explain, he rushes forward, grabbing the back of Merlin’s head and forcing their foreheads together before he can pull away. He shuts his eyes tightly, muttering some sort of incantation under his breath. Merlin gasps loudly and Mordred groans, holding their heads together for a few moments before collapsing back into his seat, clamping his hands over his eyes as if trying to press a headache away. Merlin slumps back against the warm body behind him, and Leon just about manages to catch him in strong arms before he falls to the floor.
This had all happened in the space of a few moments, and when the two of them still, the others unfreeze. Arthur turns on Mordred:
“What did you do?? What was that?!”
Mordred groans again, looking up blearily, first at Merlin, who seems to be in a similar state to him, leant against Leon, and then to Arthur:
“He wasn’t calming down, so I shared my memories. From when we met at the edge of the forest yesterday, to just before he woke up. It’ll take him a little longer than me to sort through them.”
Arthur nods and Morgana looks impressed, and everyone looks to Merlin again, waiting for him to pull the hands from his eyes and talk to them, look at them, anything.
He finally seems to relax his muscles and Leon rubs his hands up and down his arms softly; despite the fact that he’d been warmed by the fire, the knight was still oddly worried about Merlin being too cold. He lets out a deep breath, lowering his shaking hands as he slowly raises his teary gaze, staring at Arthur:
“You... you want me to stay?”
Arthur ignores the tears dripping down his cheeks as nods desperately, forcing a soft smile on his face as he sniffles:
“Yes. Please. We don’t want you to go, we don’t hate you.”
Merlin launches himself at Arthur and the only thing stopping The King from falling back from Merlin’s surprising weight is Percival’s hand on his back. Arthur wraps his arms tightly around Merlin’s middles, turning his head to press a kiss to the other man’s temple as he tries to get his tears under control; he completely ignores the others in favour of muttering into Merlin’s hair:
“It’s alright, Merlin. You stay here, with us, as long as you want. We... I, love you. Stay, please.”
Merlin just sobs harder, gripping the back of Arthur’s tunic as he kneels on the bed, his response stuttering and barely understandable:
“But- but I’m-”
Arthur just hushes him, stroking a hand through his hair and giving everyone else in the room pointed looks. They all crowd around Merlin again, placing comforting hands on his back and shoulders and arms and hands. Mordred whispers his adoration in Merlin’s head, and Morgana presses a kiss to the nape of his neck, all in the hopes of convincing him that the memories he had were true.
His breathing finally calms, and Arthur shuffles to the side so he can sit down next to him, not daring to remove the arms from around his neck or push him away. Merlin pulls away himself when Arthur settles, but doesn’t move far, and there’s no space between them as he hastily wipes the tears from his face, staring at him lap, cheeks flushed. Arthur takes his hand slowly in his, but Merlin still doesn’t look up, so Morgana kneels in front of him, placing her hand on his knee softly and saying with a teasing smirk on her face:
“You know, if I’d known that my teacher was The God of Magic, I might’ve complained less at the studying you make me do.”
Merlin finally looks up at her, a weak smile on his face, and Morgana winks at him. It’s Gwaine who tries next, settling on Merlin’s other side and sighing loudly:
“Forget the God thing do you know how many pranks we could’ve pulled if you’d told me you had magic?? Can’t believe you’d take that opportunity from me, all of you.”
He gives Mordred and Morgana jokingly offended glares and they roll their eyes, though their attention is quickly drawn back to Merlin, whose hands are clenching tightly in his lap. The room goes dark all of a sudden, and a glance to the window would tell them that the clear morning was suddenly overcast, thunder rumbling in the distance as rain slammed against the glass. Arthur squeezes Merlin’s hand and quickly, though gently, shoves Morgana out of the way, kneeling in front of Merlin and lifting his chin with his free hand:
“It’s fine, Merlin. We’ve all got a ton of questions but everything’s going to be alright, I swear. In fact, I’m glad we found out, it was cruel of us to make you live in a kingdom where you aren’t accepted, but that changes now, I promise.”
Merlin stands suddenly and walks between them, taking a deep breath before turning suddenly a scowl on his face:
“It wasn’t her choice to make, it was mine, and she took it from me.-”
With every harsh the thunder grew closer and the glass in the window frame shook more violently:
“-I was going to tell you after you changed your mind about magic because it had to come from the heart. You can’t change the Kingdom just for my sake! I wanted to do it properly and she took that from me because she was bored!”
Everyone rushes to say something in an effort to calm him down, both for the safety of the windows and his happiness, but Arthur’s blunt-
“Why?”
-stops them in their tracks. Merlin looks to him sharply, though Arthur is grateful for the thunder quietening down as he replies:
“What do you mean why? Why what?”
Arthur huffs out a gentle laugh, shaking his head in disbelief:
“Why can’t I change the Kingdom for you? You’re important, you’ve touched so many lives in so many wonderous ways; that in itself tells me that magic isn’t evil, so why can’t I change the Kingdom for you?”
The thunder stops and the rain slows to a gentle patter as Merlin tilts his head, his scowl of anger morphing into a sad, confused frown as he responds in a small voice:
“But... I’m just a servant. You’re not doing it out of fear, so I’m still just... nobody important.”
Arthur just laughs again, walking towards Merlin and settling soft hands on his shoulders, grateful to feel the others close to his back:
“You have never once been just a servant, Merlin. Something tells me you’ve been saving my life, and this Kingdom, since the day we met, so even if it had no effect on anyone else whatsoever, I would still change the law. Because you are a good man, and you are important, and you deserve it. Compared to you, it is us, who are just human.-”
Merlin frowns again and Arthur rolls his eyes to stop him arguing:
“-Just... give me another hug, and accept it. You idiot.”
He can feel someone (probably Morgana) thump him on the back, but he doesn’t turn around, eagerly returning Merlin’s hug when the brunette wraps his arms around Arthur’s middle tightly. The King presses closer, uncaring of what his audience thinks of him for the first time in his life (probably because he has a feeling that they’ve known of his... affections, longer than even he has) and  mutters his question into Merlin’s ear:
“We... I love you, Merlin, more than anything. Will you stay with me?”
The King is vaguely aware of his First Knight whispering “I told you so, idiot.” behind him, but all he cares about is the sensation of the God, more ancient and powerful than anything he could ever comprehend, nodding into is neck.
THE END!!
I really enjoyed writing this, and I hope y’all like it!!
Link to the Dark!Merlin version (I warn you, it’s hella angsty) is at the top!! :)
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spencers-renaissance · 3 years ago
Text
Emergency Contact
Summary: When Spencer ends up in the hospital again, his emergency contact — who happens to be his boyfriend, Luke Alvez — is called. Too bad he hasn't told the team about him yet...
Tags: whump, h/c, hurt spencer, broken ribs, coming out, relationship reveal, protective derek, team as family, fluff, au: different first meeting
Pairing: Luke Alvez x Spencer Reid // (heavy on the Derek & Spencer friendship, too)
Word Count: 2.6k
Masterlist // Read on AO3 // Bad Things Happen Bingo
Okay, so Emily was not in S11, but for this fic she is, because I wanted supportive Penemily and that's what I gave myself. Other than that, this fills the square "broken ribs" for my Bad Things Happen bingo card. Enjoy the whump mixed with fluff!
Spencer doesn’t mean to get hurt again, but he also isn’t exactly surprised when it happens. If anything, Hotch really needs to stop sending him out to scope places and suspects out by himself. Surely Tobias Hankel proved he’s a trouble magnet in that regard years ago.
The summerhouse the suspect rents is a nice enough place to lay incapacitated while he waits for back-up, he supposes, but he’s not exactly able to lie and enjoy the sunshine when his ribs have been smashed in with a metal baseball bat and he knows the suspect is currently hightailing it down the beach. Not to mention the fact that it’s worryingly difficult to breathe.
Still, it’s better than a dilapidated cabin in the middle of butt-fuck nowhere Georgia, pumped full of heroin while his feet are whipped. Small mercies.
“Goddamnit, Spencer, again?” Derek asks amusedly when he finally arrives and crouches down by his side, but the undercurrent of worry in his voice doesn’t elude him.
“Sorry,” he wheezes, still winded and in immense pain from the ambush. “I didn’t see him coming.”
Derek raises a brow, chuckling slightly. “Yeah, pretty boy, I figured that.” His hand goes to Spencer’s hair as his expression furrows in concern again. “Did you see where he went? I’ll send the others after him while I go with you to the hospital.”
Spencer smiles a little, relieved that he won’t be alone. It’s become a strange sort of tradition to sit in one another’s hospital rooms after the job kicks their ass, and he’s glad Derek isn’t about to break it now.
“I saw him turn right out of the backdoor, but that’s all,” he says breathlessly, before cringing at the effort and folding in on himself even more.
“Okay, Spencer,” Derek says soothingly. “Just relax. The ambulance will be here any second.”
He obeys and closes his eyes as he listens to Derek call Hotch on the radio and send the team in the right direction before coming back to sit next to him on the floor.
“This might be one of the nicer places one of our unsubs has owned, huh?”
Spencer nods, mirroring Derek’s morbid amusement. “Crime pays better than investigating it,” he manages, smiling up at his friend.
He snorts. “You can say that again. With the way the market’s turned in the last couple years it’s more like this is my hobby and my properties are my day job, rather than the other way round.”
Spencer tries to reply, but he moves involuntarily in amusement, and a fresh wave of pain has him wincing again, trying to will the tears away.
“You’re alright, Spence,” Derek says gently, his hand returning to his hair. “Help will be here soon, okay?”
Thankfully, the medics do show up in a semi-timely fashion, and both of them are loaded into the back of the ambulance as the EMTs check him over, Derek’s hand not leaving his person unless it absolutely has to.
“How many times were you hit, Dr Reid?”
He cringes. “Four.” It’s almost embarrassing that the unsub got four hits in, and the only reason there weren’t more is because he was fleeing the scene, not because Spencer was able to fight back. He tries to remind himself that there isn’t much you can do when caught-off guard by a furious arsonist armed with a steel baseball bat, but his ego is still bruised. Albeit not as badly as his poor ribs.
“I’m gonna fucking kill him,” Derek mutters under his breath, his grip tightening on Spencer’s shoulder minutely enough for him to know he isn’t doing it consciously.
Spencer smiles appreciatively, closing his eyes against the pain. The non-narcotic painkillers they’re feeding him through the IV really aren’t doing anything.
“I think you’ve managed to avoid internal bleeding,” the EMT says, all though he tacks on a pointed, “just. But I’m concerned about the possibility of a punctured lung. There’s a chance your trouble breathing is solely pain-induced, but I don’t like the way your chest sounds. The doctors will check everything out when we get to the hospital, and get you all patched up.”
“Hold in there,” Derek says urgently. “I really can’t have you dying on me, pretty boy.”
Spencer smiles as comfortingly as he can through the immense pain in his chest and his mangled breathing. “Trust me, I don’t intend on it.”
The x-ray reveals two broken ribs and confirms the paramedic’s suspicions of a punctured lung, although thankfully, minor enough to not require surgery. He’s set up with oxygen and regular nurse check-ups in a quiet room after the doctor is able to remove the excess air in his chest cavity.
“How are you doing, Spence?” Derek asks worriedly as he pulls up a chair next to Spencer’s bed as soon as he’s allowed to see him.
He pulls away his oxygen facemask to answer. “A bit better,” he says, but his voice is dry and raspy from the oxygen so he certainly doesn’t sound it. “The pain meds are actually working now.”
Derek’s tight, anxious expression relaxes slightly. “That’s at least something.”
Spencer nods tiredly, but before he can respond, a nurse is popping her head round the door. “Dr. Reid,” she says genially, “sorry to interrupt. I just wanted to let you know that we’ve managed to get a hold of your emergency contact, and they’re on their way.”
Spencer’s eyes widen. How could he have forgotten? Granted, he was a little preoccupied with the whole punctured lung, broken ribs thing, but how could he have let it slip his mind that this little accident would lead to the secret he’s been keeping under wraps getting out?
When he’d first met Luke at an FBI gala last year, he never could have foreseen the most intimate and special relationship of his life coming to fruition, but it had. They’d connected on so many different levels, and the chemistry between them felt like something out of one of the fantastical romance novels Penelope reads, and when he’d asked if it was okay for Spencer to put Luke down as his updated emergency contact, he’d been rewarded with a wide, beautiful grin and a firm, heartfelt kiss.
It was serious enough, sure, and they were coming up on having been together for a year, but besides Emily and Penelope — who’d met Luke and developed an amusing, playful rivalry with him — he hadn’t introduced him to anyone on the team.
“On their way?” Derek asks, raising an eyebrow in mild confusion. “Isn’t your contact Hotch? He already knows you’re in the hospital.”
Spencer just stares at him like a rabbit caught in the headlights, completely blanking on something to say. They’re working a local case, so it won’t be long before Luke is bursting into his hospital room armed with cuddles and comfort, and as much as he craves that, he’s too busy panicking about his team finding out to really look forward to it.
Eventually, after watching Derek’s face morph into even stronger, more suspicious confusion, he gives up. They’re going to find out anyway. “I’m dating someone.”
Derek’s face lights up. “Pretty boy!” he exclaims happily, playfully pushing his shoulder as gently as he can. “That’s amazing! Why didn’t you say something? What’s her name?”
Ah. That’s the primary reason he hadn’t told his team about Luke. He’s nowhere close to being ashamed about his sexuality, he accepted himself decades ago, but he’s still not worked up the courage to share that part of himself with his team. Excluding Penelope and Emily who have been together for years (he’s still baffled as to how the others haven’t caught on yet), everyone’s in the dark.
It had started as a basic survival tactic. He’d joined the FBI two years younger than the standard entry age in the early 2000s, and he was far too concerned with just getting by than living outwardly as a gay man. And then, as time went by and he knew his team was accepting and welcoming, he found it too awkward to try and correct people when they assumed he was straight. There just wasn’t ever the right time.
“I’m gay.”
Derek’s happy expression falls and for a split second, Spencer feels a flash of panic. Maybe Derek’s okay with gay people as long as they’re not his immediate friends, as long as he doesn’t playfully call them ‘pretty boy’ and play with their hair when they’re injured, maybe—
“Well, what’s his name, then?”
Spencer looks up from his panic, seeing Derek smiling again, eyes maybe even brighter than they were just seconds ago.
“Wait—”
“Spencer, if you think I’m gonna care that you’re gay — if you think any of us will care that you’re gay, then you have another thing coming,” Derek reassures him. “Wait, that isn’t why you didn’t tell us right?”
He suddenly looks distraught at the idea that Spencer might not have felt comfortable coming out to him, and Spencer rushes to correct him. “No! No, I know everyone would be fine with it, I just didn’t really know how to say it. Penelope and Emily know, but only by accident.”
Derek relaxes, chuckling a little. “I’m sure there’s quite a story there.”
Spencer blushes. “Maybe.”
“I’ll find out later,” he says confidently, winking at him, and something in Spencer loosens at the fact that Derek hasn’t changed his behaviour at all. “But I’m more interested in Mr. Sexy Emergency Contact Mystery Boyfriend Man right now.”
Spencer outright laughs at that, before wincing painfully as his ribs twinge, and he has to fit the oxygen mask around his face again and breathe deeply for a couple of breaths before the nasal cannula can suffice again.
“I met him around this time last year at an FBI gala actually,” Spencer manages. “Everyone on our team bailed except Penelope, Emily, and me. He’s called Luke and he works in the Fugitive Task Force. We just clicked as soon as we met, you know? We have this chemistry that I’ve never felt with anyone before, and we started dating pretty quickly. We actually moved in together last month when his lease was up, but we’re thinking of moving to a bigger, nicer place in Mount Pleasant. Luke’s actually had his eye on this one house that went up…”
He trails off when he notices Derek looking at him strangely, suddenly feeling self-conscious. “What?”
“Nothing,” Derek says gently. “You just look happy, pretty boy. When you started talking about Luke you got this happy, dopey smile on your face, and I’ve just never seen you like that. It’s nice.”
“Oh.” He blushes fiercely at the acknowledgement of just how soft he is for his boyfriend, but it’s not embarrassing, he’s just ridiculously happy and head over heels in love.
Still, feeling a little awkward at the attention, he raises the oxygen mask to his face just for something to do.
“Does he treat you well?” Derek asks seriously, suddenly looking like the FBI tough guy he really is.
Spencer grins and nods, pulling the mask away again. “So good. He’s one of those people that looks out for everyone before himself, you know? He listens to my rambles and tangents like he actually knows and cares about what I’m saying, and he insists on making me every meal we’re both home for. Every day off, he brings me breakfast in bed, and he’ll even suffer through my documentaries even though his favourite thing to watch is action movies. He’s the best boyfriend I could hope for.”
“Good,” Derek says fiercely, even though he’s smiling just a little at the thought of Spencer being taken care of. “But if anything ever changes, I won’t hesitate to—”
“Spencer?” Derek’s interrupted by the door flying over, and a very harried looking Luke Alvez rushing towards the bed, seemingly not noticing the man literally threatening his death right next to him. “Oh my God, Spencer, I was so worried, I thought—”
“Hey, it’s okay,” Spencer says, voice still a little weak. Can’t he at least sound convincing when he’s trying to tell these people that he’s fine? “I’m okay, I’ll be out of here before you know it.”
“Are you sure, baby? Do I need to get the doctor? Have they been looking after you, because I swear—”
“Luke,” he laughs, interrupting his worried tangent. “I’m fine, I promise.”
He watches amusedly as Luke sags with relief. “Oh thank God,” he breathes, and it’s then that he appears to notice Derek. “Oh, shit.”
He looks to Spencer with an alarmed look in his eyes, knowing full well that he isn’t out to his team yet, but before apologies can start dripping off his lips, he rushes to fill him in.
“It’s okay. I told him.”
Luke’s face brightens in an illuminating smile, his eyes wide and happy. “You did? I’m so proud of you, cariño.”
“It’s nice to meet you,” Derek says, rising from his chair to shake Luke’s hand. “I’ve heard a lot about you in the last ten minutes.”
Luke grins. “All good things, I hope.”
Derek winks teasingly at Spencer. “Oh, better than good. Spencer here seems quite gone for you.”
He blushes again, but Luke just sits on the edge of his hospital bed and takes his face in his hand. “Well, I’m just as gone for him as he is for me. Probably even more so.”
“No way,” Spencer protests as vehemently as he can with an oxygen mask glued to his face again. “I definitely love you more.”
His words are half swallowed by the mask, and half muffled by the gaggle of FBI agents pouring into his room, all talking over one another loudly.
Luke jumps off the bed and stands to attention as they all quieten down, three of them in complete shock, one of them — Emily, recognising Luke — in anticipation of what’s about to happen.
“Uh,” Spencer starts unsurely, eyes flicking between his boyfriend and his team. “Meet my boyfriend?”
There’s a brief pause before everyone jumps into action again: Emily greeting him warmly, JJ introducing herself, and Hotch and Rossi giving him firm, threatening handshakes as a warning that no harm is to come to their pseudo-son.
Spencer knows they don’t have to worry about that, though, not with Luke, and they’re quickly shown that when he takes his rightful place sat on the edge of his hospital bed again, hands smoothing his hair gently.
“Thank you,” he says to Derek, voice soft and sincere as everyone’s sat leisurely around the room, doing their own thing now they’re calmed down after the initial meet and greet, “for taking care of him. I worry about him, you know, and it’s good to see that he has so many good people looking after him.”
“We all do,” Derek replies, looking over at Spencer fondly. “We’re all incredibly overprotective. Residual effects from him joining the team so young, probably.”
“I can see that,” Luke smiles, looking over at Hotch and Rossi, who still have their eyes trained on him, despite having warmed up to him quickly.
“Well between us all,” Emily interjects diplomatically, “I think we have Spencer covered. He has a lot of good people looking out for him.”
Spencer knows they all think he’s asleep, but he can’t help but say something. “I definitely do,” he slurs tiredly, causing Luke to quickly turn his attention to him, pressing a tender kiss to his forehead as he runs his fingers through his hair with the hand not intertwined with Spencer’s. “Love you.”
“I love you too, baby,” Luke murmurs. “And so does everybody in this room.”
Smiling softly and feeling safe as anything, Spencer finally gives into the heavy pull of tiredness, and lets himself drift off to sleep.
I'm such a sucker for coming out fics omg, I hope you didn't mind that element! But God, I've missed writing Ralvez fics. If anyone has any Ralvez prompts then please send them my way because I want to write them so badly but I really find it hard to find plot for them! <3
taglist: @criminalmindsvibez @suburban--gothic @strippersenseii @takeyourleap-of-faith @makaylajadewrites @iamrenstark @hotchseyebrows @reidology @spencerspecifics @tobias-hankel @goobzoop @marsjareau @garcias-bitch @oliverbrnch @im-autistic @anxious-enby @kuolonsyoja @ropoto
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maleyanderecafe · 3 years ago
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have you read the webcomic / manhwa Ennead ??? If you have, I would like to know your opinion about what kind of yandere Osiris, Horus and Anubis could become, please?
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Ennead is like 90 chapters so I hope I get some teeth from this. Despite the fact that there is a mature warning, there are only four or five scenes where sex is involved. Ennead was one of those webcomics that made me learn a lot about Egyptian Gods (more of their names and relationships rather than full-on lore though), but it was still sort of confusing? I think the second season of it is more interesting and coherent to me but it does rely on having read the first season, which I still don't fully understand. I'll try my best to summarize it though. It's really awkward though since it's incest in some places, but I guess because it's a god lore thing it's more understandable (Greek Gods and Egyptian Gods for instance often are related sort of to each other but they still marry), but it's still kind of awkward since they address each other as such.
The first part starts out with Seth, the god of war, cutting off his son Inubus's arm. It eventually moves on to Seth and Horus having a contest of sorts, where if Seth wins, he becomes a higher ruling god whereas if Horus wins, he will become a full-fledged god, as currently, he's more in a demi-god position. Throughout the story, we see that Seth's wife, Nephthys is trapped in a cage, presumably by Seth. Horus's mother, Isis, really hates Seth and is partially using Horus to try to get revenge on him in one way or another, whereas Horus seems to have some sort of affection towards Seth. At some point, Seth meets with Osiris, the god of life, and we see that Seth isn't simply just an angry antagonist. While he was granted as the god of war, he was originally the god of sand, and the reason he went to war was so he could protect Egypt. Nephthys had some sort of deal with Osiris, and she presumably had a crush on him. They sorted of cheated (not cheated? It's kind of confusing) on Seth by having Osiris implant his seed in her though it was actually Seth's seed? (I'm really confused by this, it might have just been Osiris's seed), meaning that Anubis was not actually Seth's child. It turns out that Osiris actually had a crush on Seth and presumes to rape him, and Seth is able to trap Osiris (I assume Osiris isn't dead, considering he is basically immortal). At some point, Seth is put on trial for the things he has done, specifically during the war having souls be dusted to the point where they couldn't even be judged during the afterlife. After some interference on the part of Nephthys and Horus, Seth is punished by essentially having to find the souls of those who he dusted and placed in a human(ish) body. In the second season, he struggles with a human body and tries to take control of his cult of Seth followers, who are incredibly suspicious of him. As he goes out, he becomes more sympathetic towards humans, even feeling remorse when seeing a human body that looks like Isis.
One thing that I really liked about the story is how initially Seth is shown as a straight-up bad guy, cutting off his son's arm, being generally angry, and being the god of war, but his past is much more complicated than that. It's shown that he really loves his son Anubis, to the point that when he is given a handicap in the last part of the contest, he refuses to lose it, since it's a gift that he gave to Anubis that made him really happy. He's incredibly afraid that Osiris might hurt him when they have an encounter, despite the fact that he might not be his blood-related child. While he's definitely not a good guy considering he caused wars and doesn't care about human lives, we can empathize with him considering the gods did him really dirty, basically making him a sort of scapegoat when he really should have been the god of sand rather than the god of war. Horus seems to really crave Seth's attention and love as well, even putting the curse on himself that Seth gave to his son Anubis. It seems like Horus really wished to replace Anubis as Seth's son, but no matter what he did, he was never able to do it. I also kinda like Ra in this story, she's just so sassy sometimes that I find it funny as well as the god of information Thoth. All the gods in here are also really scantily dressed and sexy looking, which I guess makes sense since they're in Egypt and also they're gods.
While none of them are yandere as I've read, the question is more about what kind of yandere they might become. For me, Osiris would probably end up being a manipulative yandere, considering he was able to manipulate Nephthys to get with Seth at some point, even attempting to use Anubis's life against him and maybe even trap him at some point. Horus is probably one that would actually trap him, as seen in the not official rape bonus chapter that he had. I'd also assume that he would be a protective yandere since he never really wishes to hurt Seth no matter what the two do. In more recent chapters, he looks jealous of this one guy that is somehow connected to Isis, I believe. As for Anibus, it's a little hard to say. He seems to have a complicated relationship with his dad, with him remembering Seth being kind to him, while also, you know chopping off his arm and trapping his mom. Perhaps a platonic, vengeful yandere? I don't really know.
The story itself is pretty cool, even if I didn't really get the first half. If you like Egyptian stories, this one is a pretty good read.
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soulmeshart · 4 years ago
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Why Stolitz will be endgame
Since the latest episode of Helluva Boss dropped (episode 5) I’ve been seeing a lot of people simply pointing out that Stolitz is problematic and toxic and that it shouldn’t be shipped. However these people never really think about the fact that  a) this is only the fifth episode b) where the ship is heading So I’m here to talk about that. What we’ve seen in these first 5 episodes is simply a look at what the relationship between these two is and who they are individually. This episode in particular was great because it pointed out two important things to us: 1. Blitzo doesn’t hate Stolas’ and deep down probably craves some sort of romantic relationship between them 2. The core issues of their current relationship Let me elaborate both of these 1. So far we’ve had the impression that Stolas is simply a nuisance to Blitzo and that he is simply using him for the book. All of their interactions up until this episode we’re pretty negative and made it seem like their relationship is purely sexual and that it exists for business reasons only. Episode 2 let us know that Stolas wants to get Blitzo involved in his life outside of the whole “transactional fucking” thing and this episode let us know that, well, Blitzo really doesn’t mind that. Think back to the first scene in episode 5. If Blitzo only wanted a purely professional relationship with Stolas or even hated him(as some people believe for whatever reason), he wouldn’t have agreed to go to the Harvest Moon Festival. There was nothing for him to gain by going there and he agrees to the invite without any real hesitation. This let’s us know that Blitzo doesn’t hate Stolas and is fine with being involved with him outside of their deal. Now for the “craving for some sort of romantic relationship part”. There are 2 hints about this in the episode. The first one comes in the scene where Blitzo tries to explain his relationship with Stolas to Striker and gets really emberassed. Remember what Striker says: “So you even conned that ditzy blue blood into getting you to the surface.” If this was the case Blitzo probably would’ve been proud of himself and simply confirmed that what Striker just said was true. But that wasn’t what happened. He got flustered and started fumbling his words around. The second hint is in the scene when Blitzo finds out that Striker is planning to assassinate Stolas. Striker tries to get to Blitzo to get him to join his side. He keeps telling him things that clearly bother Blitzo. For example: how the system is rigged against him. In those things he also lists the fact that Blitzo is being treated by Stolas as a toy/plaything. Now, why would Blitzo be bothered by this if his and Stolas’ relationship really is purely transactional. If that were the case then they’re both just using eachother and that’s the end of that. Blitzo is using Stolas for the book and Stolas is using Blitzo for sexual favors. Now weather this is or isn’t the case isn’t important here, what’s important is the fact that Blitzo doesn’t want this to be the case. Aka he wants his relationship with Stolas to be something more.
2. Now let’s look at the core issues of their relationship which are all presented in this episode very nicely. Stolas does a lot of condescending things to Blitzo throughout the episode. He baby-talks to him twice, puts out a cigar on his horn (though we know fire doesn’t hurt imps, it’s still disrespectful), he shows him off in public like he’s some sort of thing, etc. Now let me clear this up first, Stolas’ intentions aren’t malicious. He loves and cares about Blitzo. When it comes to the show, we know this because a) If Stolas just wanted to fuck an imp, he could’ve gone to way less trouble to do so and wouldn’t have to lend out his book which is VERY important b) He wouldn’t try to get Blitzo involved with his personal life and the most important person in his life, his daughter. A parent introducing their SO to their child is a pretty big deal. Now Stolas should’ve considered both Blitzo’s and Octavia’s feelings before doing that however we know that he really isn’t experienced with healthy relationships with other people (romantic and platonic). If we’re talking outside of the show, there are official instagram accounts for all of the Helluva Boss characters. The two most active ones are actually Blitzo’s and Stolas’ (jeez i wonder why). Now these accounts we’re confirmed to not be a 100% canon in the sense that not everything that happens there happened in the actual universe of the show. However Viv has stated that these accounts are ran by people who know all of the characters PRETTY GOOD. And in case you haven’t seen these accounts, Blitzo and Stolas have a lot and i mean A LOT of very positive interactions there. Sure we will occasionally get a horny comment left by Stolas’ on one of Blitzo’s posts or even a horny post of his own regarding Blitzo. But what we see more is just genuine wholesome stuff between the two. For example: Stolas constantly leaving positive comments on Blitzo’s posts such as telling him to have fun when he goes to hang out with either Loona or M&M, him supporting Blitzo’s passion for art and horses, we also get to see him putting up missing posters and searching for Blitzo at one point when Blitzo get’s lost. We see him visiting Blitzo to take care of him when he’s sick,etc. The list goes on and on. Obviously most of this didn’t happen but what’s important is the fact that Stolas clearly cares about Blitzo, like, a lot actually. The show hasn’t gone to this point yet but this is clearly where it’s headed. Plus the official twitter account for Helluva Boss reposts a ton of Stolitz fanart and they don’t do this for other ships, except M&M.
Now back to the issues of the relationship. All of the things I’ve listed (the baby talk, the cigar thing,etc.) wouldn’t seem like much of an issue IF there clearly wasn’t a class difference between them. In this episode the show REALLY let’s us know how bad imps have it. It’s rare to see them start businesses, the system is rigged against them, Stolas is also kind of condescending to them in his speech (though it’s obvious he actually does like imps and he isn’t intentionally being like this. He even calls the Harvest Moon Festival “charming”). I don’t think he realizes how inappropriate his behavior is. I think future episodes will almost a 100% tackle the topic of Stolas’ realizing how different the lives of imps are from his. This will also let him have a better understanding of Blitzo. All of his actions towards Blitzo through the episode, even thought they’re made with good intent, to Blitzo it just seems like Stolas sees him as a toy (even thought this isn’t the case).
In short, on one side we have Blitzo who is craving a romantic relationship (specifically with Stolas) but believes that Stolas is simply using him for sexual reasons and deeply dislikes his unintentionally condescending attitude towards him, and on the other side we have Stolas, who had lead a loveless life for years and has finally fallen for someone but is too blinded by his infatuation for Blitzo and the thrill of love to consider how Blitzo is feeling and the difference between their positions.
Now, this ship is going to be an end game ship a 100%. What we’ve seen so far is only what the starting point of their relationship is. They’re both going to grow as the show goes on and so will their relationship. Stolas will learn to consider other peoples emotions (which isn’t only a problem specifically related to Blitzo but also his daughter), the struggles of imps and how to properly convey his emotions so that Blitzo doesn’t mistake them as purely sexual. And Blitzo will also need to learn how to open up his heart and to stop running away from others (which is something he does I’m assuming, it looks like he ran away from his relationship with Verosika and it seems like their relationship was p serious given the fact she has a tattoo with his name).
Also while I do think Striker and Blitzo have a fun dynamic, I don’t think this is even an option as an end game ship. The sexual tension was high but that’s about it. Plus Striker was trying to manipulate Blitzo which isn’t cool in my book. Not against the ship tho.
So yeah, gonna reblog this when these 2 idiots (stolas and blitzo) get together with a big “told ya so”.
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juusworld5728 · 4 years ago
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Lets talk about Azriel’s shadows...
I think that a lot of people seem to forget what Azriel’s shadows actually represent and what different reaction from them actually mean.
Lets start at the very beginning to his childhood... For the first 11 years of his life, Azriel lived in a cell with no windows or light. He was allowed to come out only for an hour a day, and to see his mother for one hour every week. There are many different ways that one can argue how Azriel came to acquire his shadowsinging abilities or whether it was something genetic (either way, its very rare). Rhysand did mention that he might’ve learned to speak to his shadows in the cell that he was kept in. Either way, his shadows are not something of his past that he necessarily wants to remember. Whether he’s appreciative of those shadows now does not reflect the fact that they were born out of fear and loneliness.
In terms of personality, it’s very important to note how he reacts to things and different people. The way that I see it, he uses his shadows as a defense mechanism. Whenever he’s in an uncomfortable situation, he tends to hide in a corner and his shadows surround him to block from sight. However, when he’s in a good situation or surrounded by certain people, they seem to go away. A lot of people see that as a bad thing, but his shadows are not only supposed to represent his powers, but also his very traumatic past. Soooo you might ask, what exactly do the shadowsinger’s shadows represent?
Well, here is my take. Those shadows in terms that are not power-based, represent that very same cell that he was locked in for the first 11 years of his life. I’m not talking about Nuala and Cerridwen here. I’m talking about his defense mechanism shadows. This wonderful male was trapped without social contact, friends, or anyone to rely on. So yeah, he will be introvert. He has a family, but that doesn't stop him from the fact that his social skills will not be the best in comparison. His shadows represent his loneliness that he feels he deserves and craves when he feels cornered. For the first 11 years of his life, that was ALL HE KNEW. When his shadows “brighten” or are nowhere to be seen, I can imagine that as being the hour he had out of his cell every day. That feeling of relief and freedom. Yes, he needs to learn to accept himself more and who he has become. However, that can be done in the sense that his shadows do not have to be around him ALL THE TIME.
Now, in terms of relationships: 
Mor: His first love. At the young age of around 19. Only 8 years after he’s been let out into society and learned his way through. Does he even know how to handle love?? Probably not. He was born a bastard and probably saw his mother being treated like shit by his father and stepmother. So I doubt love is something he believes in at this point. However, he does fall in love with her. His reaction to that? What he knows best. Avoidance. That dark cell still very present in his mind. That feeling of being very aware of how broken you are but don’t know how to fix it. He does not want to put that burden on Mor. Everything that happens between Cassian and Mor probably makes him feel even worse. Throughout the years though, he can’t help but feel happy just to be around her and in her presence (hence why his shadows disappear). It can be argued that he's known that she hasn't been interested for a while. Maybe what he truly craved wasn't the actual love that he wanted from Mor, but the feeling of love that came from her that made his shadows go away. He craved it and wanted to be around her for that feeling.
Elain: The first time that Azriel meets Elain is in the human lands. She asks him if he can truly fly. He blushes and gets flustered, and why? Do you think that maybe a lot of people haven't bothered to see him in a certain light to ask those type of questions? I mean sure he has his family, but this human girl that is supposedly terrified of him because he’s fae, asks him such a simple and light-hearted question... Slowly but surely, in ACOWAR he beings to get more comfortable with her. She’s broken but at the same time, holding on. He takes notice of a certain light that she radiates as well as her seer powers a little bit later. The first time they’re brought over to the House of Wind, she calls his scars beautiful. The importance of this scene is very overlooked. She called the thing that makes him the most insecure, induces the most amount of fear, and creates his hatred... beautiful. This woman that barely knows him has already accepted every part of him. He further loves to glance out at the garden (a place of happiness that reminds him of Elain) and loves to look at that hidden light in her eyes that makes his shadows either brighten or disappear. It’s very similar to the feeling with Morrigan, but more direct and has incentive. Now, lets talk about truth-teller (the knife that always strikes true). That is one part of himself that he has never shared with ANYONE. Why did he give her truth-teller? Because Elain has already accepted every part of him. Truth-teller is an extension to himself in a sense. Something that belongs wholly to him and makes him feel safe. He trusts Elain enough to give her a part of himself. A very vulnerable moment never seen before by Azriel. In ACOFAS, When Azriel asks about Lucien, he truly does not want to spy on him. It could be for privacy reasons because of Elain but also because he’s afraid of what he’ll see from him in terms of Elain. His siphons gutter and he stutters over his words. Now, winter solstice was a very light-hearted moment but very important as well. As we can tell, Elain is the perfect gift-giver. She gives Azriel a potion for his headaches which is perfect and very hilarious since he laughs (he’s never laughed before in Feyre’s presence). It’s very telling to Elain’s personality as being a very attentive person which amounts to her really caring about Azriel and what’s going on with him. He tends to be pretty hidden and keeps a poker face most of the time, so for her to notice the little things like that is very important. I rest my case..... for now.
Gwyn: I honestly cannot say much about this ship. What I can say are from pages I have been sent and trends I have been seeing through Azriel’s personality. It seems to me like Azriel is the least tense around people he considers his friends and brothers. Even though he's usually pretty serious anyways, the bat boys seem really comfortable with each other. When Mor was around (especially in ACOMAF), he would get worried. However, when she wasn't paying to him, his shadows would disappear (similar things happened with Elain). It seems to me like Gwyn has an outwardly fun personality and Azriel has no problem with that because he is not worried about anything happening. The most I’ve seen from the books between them is simple banter that included the rest of the friend group. When either of them talk, what I’ve seen from Azriel is amusement. That amusement results in Azriel’s shadows dancing around HIMSELF. Not anyone else. No, the shadows did not dance around Gwyn or any other person. I currently see this as a friendship and would need more build-up for me to even ship it. It seems like Azriel seems fine acting like this with people he is not worried about catching feelings with.
Thank you for coming to my ted talk.
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