#this ref does need an update though lol

[justcallmecho]

((I like to make refsheets. Starting off with one of Cho's cannon classes, his main job, Dark Knight.))

[tomiyeee]

hope yall don’t mind me sharing some screenshots of the lair that i made in the sims 😳 the third floor is still not completely finished, but i really like what i’ve got so far :)

sorry it's....long, this place is huge 😭

first floor! it's shaped like a turtle 🥺 the hallway leads to a set of ladders that connects every floor

donnie's room; mikey was chillin on the bed when i opened the game and i just had to leave him there for the photo op 🥺🧡 had to add a lot more decorations to it so it didn't look like a sad little depression chamber lol

leo's room; had to keep from gagging as i made it...you can almost smell the gym musk 🤢🤢 (im kidding 😭 ....mostly). also the lighting is sposed to be red, but i kept getting his and raph's rooms mixed up while playing so i color-coded all of them instead :)

best boy mikey's room!!! it looks like a tornado came through it and we love that for him 🧡 unfortunately could not find a hammock bed, but there was a very cute bunk bed with the perfect colors for him ehehe

raph's room; could not find a whole lot of refs for it in the show?? had to improvise basically half of it. and can you believe this game doesn't have a weight lifting bench???

second floor! ignore the fucked up little hallway, i just wanted to keep the layout (relatively) accurate while still making the map playable 😭 the dark room was the gnome room, but i might have sold all of the gnomes 🤔

arcade; the flooring is inaccurate, but they added it in the new update and it just looked so fun

kitchen; one of my favorites! i wish i had this many string lights in my house irl..

splinter's room (it's honestly so barren in the show, i had to improvise a lot 😭)

third floor....is very much unfinished so i won't share as many screenshots 😭

projector room; it's super barren, i still need to decorate the walls and i've just been dumping random hobby-related furniture in here, but i'm still sharing cuz i'm really happy i was able to get the colors, lighting, and floor as close as i did 😊 (SO lucky i found those rugs lol)

aaaaand everybody's least favorite bathroom! from the piebald episode lol. it's so goddamn ugly, but tragically it's the only finished room on this floor 😔

donnie's lab and the garage are hardly accurate to the show (afaik this game does not have a giant tank, or even cars, to just park inside your sims' house), so i've mostly been using them to dump hobby/needs-related furniture like donnie's science stuff and kitchen appliances. i'll get to finishing them eventually 😭

i'm happy with how it's turned out so far, though! their whole house is so colorful and full of personality and it's been super fun to both make and play on in this game 🥺

[moth---4]

Commision Info! [updated 1/12/2024]

See bottom of post for additional refrences!

○Commisions are ALWAYS open and I almost always have same day (24hr) delivery! I post my sfw art on tumblr and my nsfw art in an 18+ furry art site called e621. You can reach out to me through tumblr messages, discord, e6 messages, and telegram. Please read terms of use at bottom.

Tumblr: moth---4

Discord: oopsie-gay

Telegram: @oopsiethatsgay

E621: oopsie-gay

Prices are generally SET but there may be slight increases for very complex designs or scenes though this is rare.

I offer quite a large variety of things but if its not on the list please do not ask. The list is made for both your and my convenience.

○Fullbody- 65 (+30 for additional character #1, + 65 for ever character after)

○Halfbody-45 (+20 for additional characters)

○Icon-15 (no additional characters, intended for profile picture)

These are fully rendered (shaded) and have additional details to polish them.

These include a simple pattern or solid color background (like a pride flag or sunset)

Backgrounds can be added but they can vary wildly in price depending on what youd like. Example 1, a character at a cafe, with full veiw of desert display case and tables, +40-50. Example 2, a character on a couch, nothing but the back wall and a sliver of a coffee table, +20

Reference sheets are another can of worms! These can take much longer than regular commisions given the time and attention to detail needed sometimes.

○Furry Ref 80 Includes 2 veiws, front and back, along with a small pelt display generally used if clothes or pose is obstructing design, and both hand and feet paws, mouth, and eyes, and wings shown seperately if needed . Aside from that colors and name will be displayed.

○Big Pony Ref ((mare BASE only)) 65 (Includes 4 veiws of the pony and some additional boxes to showcase expressions. The cutie mark and colors will be displayed)

○Small Pony Ref 20 Any screenshot from the mlp show edited to fit your pony! Will NOT include background just your guy!

Telegram stickers are a new addition to my commision list! They come in PACKS and can not be bought individually. To clarify, these are emoji like stickers used in the messaging app Telegram and are NOT physically printed or intended to be printed.

○3 pack 20

○5 pack 25

○10 pack 35

Customs are CURRENTLY CLOSED but Ill keep the info up. They have one (1!) veiw with colors and are not as polished as my regular art. They are NOT shaded so that the design can have accurate colors showcased. Just because they are not polished does not mean low effort.

○Pony- 25

○Pony-(ON BASE) 25

○Furry- 70

(Sexual content warning ahead, purely to list what Im okay with drawing NO VISUALS) Scroll to the "🌟" to skip to Terms of use

YEAH OKAYS!

Sexual art (I have an e6 for a reason lol)

Nudity in any capacity

Blood

MILD gore

Marijuana usage

(For full list of spicy content thats allowed just dm!)

NO THANK YOUS!

Mecha

Human (including humanoids like anime cat girls)

Foot fetish

Pregnancy

Scat, pee, or barf

Vore

Age play

Fat fetish (normal overweight characters welcome! Just no fetish art)

🌟🌟🌟

Thank you for reading!! The TOS is next Id appreciate if you looked at that as well before messaging me

☆Terms of Service☆

My art can and will be posted wherever I please though I will not take credit for your character. You may use my art for profile pictures, backgrounds or PERSONAL use with credit. My art may NOT be used for anything commercial including youtube videos in any capacity, twitch stream layouts, subscriber, donation or sub alerts. You may not print, sell, or produce any merchandise with my art regardless of if its intended for personal use.

You can post the artwork anywhere or use it on your profile as long as there is CLEAR and OBVIOUS credit to me with a link of some kind. You canot use the art for profit, that includes prints, merchandise or use in videos or games in any capacity. You may not edit the work or remove the watermark.

No refunds! Due to my fast work pace and 24 hour turnaround, refunds are not an option as I would lose money and time on my work. If you are unsure of my limits, being fetishes or anything else please just ask. It will save alot of trouble to just be open and communicate. If clear communication is not recived, and the art is not up to your standards because of it, that is on you. I will always sends work in progress things and you must request changes when I give opportunities.

A small fee will be put in place for changes.

And one final word, I can and WILL take legal action if you attemt to profit from my work. Please understand this is my livelyhood and primary source of income.

Thank you for considering me for commisions! I really appreciate all of you that make my dream job possible

[minevn]

(sorry for mistakes) I know I'm not most people, but I'm incredibly interested in Kei and Yani relationship (for at least a month now)! I have thoughts that either Kei created Yani, or Kei resurrected/saved a life Yani (considering how Yani parents treated them, I wouldn't be surprised if Yani was actually dying at some point). And your words that Kei previously performed medical interventions suggest that these interventions were performed on Yani. (there were also thoughts about the fact that Kei is Yani older brother, but Yani (judging by the sheet “Understand my ship in 5 minutes” Yani is older) (just stupid thoughts out loud)

A lot has actually changed since I made those "Understand my ship in 5 minutes" And they need to be updated, which I do plan of doing when I eventually finish all the refs! For now though, I will say that Kei and Yani are actually the same age! And these aren't stupid thoughts, I LOVE and ADORE theories and love seeing all your questions about the game so thank you for sharing your questions and thoughts!! <333

MAJOR SPOILERS BENEATH(like seriously I basically explain everything about Kei and Yani do not read if you want to figure everything out in the game)

You did get it right! Kei created Yani, Kei created the entirety of "Mine" actually! See Kei is in love with YOU, the player, not the MC, and made "Mine in order to get your attention and communicate with you! I don't have plans to go into how he knows you in the game cause I think it'd be more interesting to see what others come up with(For example maybe he was just an oc you saw online, or maybe Kei's a virus which is personally what I headcanon him as, but once again I'd be really interested in seeing what others come up with for Kei :3) but he's real, he exists and he made "Mine" to get your attention. Kei created Yani based off of Kei's obsession with you, Yani is Kei's obsession with you personalized and therefore Kei and Yani can do anything they want in this world. This does leave a few questions like "Why did Kei make other love interests then?" or "Why doesn't Yani destroy Kei?" for the first question, Kei loves the feeling of his obsession, he loves his extreme love for you and he wants it to grow and grow, he's a bit of a masochist ig LOL. Watching you get with these nobodies that he created, it drives him up a wall. Another reason to it though is to see what kind of person you like so Kei can base himself off of that(Though he has a bit of a hard time copying Hoshi and Habiki since they're so rude to you and you don't deserve that, rather their more so to prove that Kei is better than them and to make you fall in love with him more) Secondly, Yani can't destroy it's creator or the game itself will be destroyed. Truthfully, no matter what route Yani goes for they're bound for misery. They can't get with you or Kei will erase them, you can't get with Kei or Kei will erase them, and Yani can't kill Kei otherwise they both die. So Kei and Yani are the only ones aware they're in a game and they're the only ones that like YOU, the player(Although if the others knew they were in a game they would like you, the player, as well and rather see the blank slate MC as a way to get closer to you and talk to you) Somewhere along the way I realized that Kei and Yani have a lot in common and decided to make them one, they did both start out as their own people though. It's been mentioned that Yani has an older brother before who was good at everything and looked down upon Yani, well that older brother is a manifestation of who Kei used to be before he met you, perfect and studious doing no wrong and being loved by his parents. Yani was ruthlessly abused by their parents, and although I haven't mentioned it yet to avoid spoilers, Kei went through a lot of what Yani did, forced to sleep outside(so Kei could be away from his computer and therefore you), starved and beaten(To try and knock some sense into Kei. Kei's life was on the line so they thought that maybe if he realized that Kei would come to hate you for putting his life at risk) I've even changed Kei's eye color in his new design to be Yani's eye color! That's what the blocked out spoiler is LOL

I've really been pushing their similarities for a bit, even if a bit subtly, I've been trying to make them say "Y/N" in recent posts while everyone else says "MC" and everyone else birthday ends in "th" while Kei's ends in "st" and Yani's in "nd" similar in the sense that they're separated from everyone else but different enough to not just be the same person. And the binary in Yani's section for the birthday post being creation date since that's when Kei made Yani.

At first Kei was just interested that he could see you and hear you from your computer, but he also couldn't go anywhere. So he just watched and listened to you and fell in love slowly, you were the first thing, the first person that Kei had ever had any kind of contact with and he fell in love with you HARD. He wants you so badly but he can't leave the computer so he created a "physical" him and made a story and game that suits your tastes, something that would catch your attention and draw you in hence how "Mine" was created by Kei!

[s0lar-ch3ri]

yippee new pinned

yeah, ik, a new pin? but the other one felt too fucking long for me okay??

also its my blog so yeah anyways:

(image id: a banner with a purple background and gold accents. in the middle is big yellow text that reads "This user was apart of the July-RWI 6th RPF event." END id.)

(image id: a banner with flowers and white accents surrounding it. in the middle is bright pink text that reads "This user was apart of the July-RWI 2st RP event." below in smaller white glowing text reads "THIS BANNER WAS MADE BY @/S0LAR-CH3RI ON TUMBLR" END id.) (the slash is not there in image, i am making sure it doesnt tag me)

hey there, im the sapphic bigender slut running this blog! i use any pronouns, though i prefer he/her/it/sol (this can change so yeagh lmao). i like dogs and have some ill talk about, but im mostly a blog about writing and ramblers (with some art posts mixed in, youll know where to find them below soon)

if you want more info on the blog, check out this carrd! (and if you want to know what my past 2 old pinned posts looked like...)

-link to the 2nd or the one before this one -link to the 1st or the first of them all

i run a shit ton of rp blogs. like A LOT of absurb ones. luckily, one of my rp blogs (@oncewaskas) has a full list of the others and shit in their pin! also my friend muffin has a big big fucking rp blog list go check it out rn its so big and cool also check xem out please please please please please please they need more attention xeyre so so cool JUST RAHHHHHHHHH

(update on the thing above: heres a link to the post with all of my blogs, not just jrwi non-oc blogs)

now for tags (do be warned, there is A LOT.) (for fun im putting in parenthesizes all the refs the tags has if theres any) (also ive tried seperating them into categories where they match and shit): -

#not my usual content = might be more serious, just something i dont normally talk about (example: something that happened to me) #silli promo = im probs promoing my fics or smth #chilling in solar lights = just talking lol (sun reference) #op is not okay lmao = mostly on my older posts, im just going batshit insane bout smth - #cheri's insane again = theories >:) [i have several theory tags, this is for the more crazy/out there theories, example being my hair thief theory] #theories with cheri = like GTMTMP (game theory minus the mat pat) but for series i watch instead [also for the lesser crazier and more tame and/or plausible ones] #the rambler. = character/interest rambles - #cherry's fruity art basket = posting my own original art (like a fruit basket, also a lot of my characters are gay so yeah) #cheri's art findings = reblogging other peoples art, whatever form it may take (like fruit findings, another basket thing) #the (genderneutral) sons of this solar sun =talking about my ocs (i use gendered words ungendered, sun reference) #the bright smoothie of words = my writings (light and sun ref) #prepping for the shiney smoothie = talking about my writing and possibly also art (my writing tag is about a smoothie) - #the generator is back :) = ive used the trauma generator i found to meme something - #kingdoms of chaos = my old dnd campaign i played AND my first ever! (name of campaign) #in space chaos = the dnd campaign i curently am in, probs will talk about it saterdays (when its staerday here i mean) cause thats our campaign days (play on the name "kingdoms of chaos", if the campaign does get an actual name then im fucked lmao) #the chaos plans = a dnd campaign i wanna set up and dm for friends {wont be posrting this one much as 2 people who i want playing the campaign are on tumblr. unless they block tags then i cant do shit} (name play for "kingdoms of chaos") #gnashing teeth baby <3 = another campaign im in, probs gonna talk about this one the most (name of campaign is gnashing teeth, in reference to "WELCOME BACK TO JUST ROLL WITH IT BABY", "[insert thing here] my beloved <3") - #the pancake incident = the time i went crazy in comments to get a post to 10k notes (WE HAVE A LINK!! here it is for those unable to use the imbedded ones and what not: https://www.tumblr.com/b0nkcreat/730895614697766912/hello-everyone-i-would-just-post-the-image-here?source=share&ref=_tumblr) #ghe ersaer saga = the saga where i show off/talk about me fuckass erasers #the 2 birdies :) and gay se- = a tag for the stupid joke i have with my bud ev about the necklace with the fucking birds - #the autism is inspired?? = i found something that for whatever reason inspires me to write or whatever #just like a cool rock = like a cool rock, something interesting i found and must show the world #ohhhhhhhhhh me boobies saving for a03 = some actual writing advice thing ive found that im gonna save lol

-

#new info dropped for my brain = saving smth just cause rather then interesting #sending to the catagorized fan rays = saving fandom things (fan like fandom, rays like sun rays)

-

#*points at me* GAY = im experiencing immense attraction and you will comply (ref to how people point at others and call them gay for silly shit) - #the light in life = my dog has arrived (light and sun reference, you get it) #the fire of the sun = treasures, my dog for the tag above, brother (sun has fire) - #answers from the aster caster = ref to mythborne [a just roll with it oneshot] and a name i like, basically for asks lol

-

#a sun spirits dance. = for if im playing my sona or whateves lol

-

#jerwee supreme = a tag containing almost all my jrwi rambles (just roll with it in its shortened from is pronounced like jur-wee, weeb supreme is condis role in condicord which im in) #ghostly gazes into future eps = my fake transcripts, might be only pd but we'll see (reference to a line in a pd intro rap from will)

#the primed timing rambles = rambles about my littol au smiles

--

now with those out the way, i do have a mythborne related series im starting up, and you can suggest things i write! the way to do so is in the carrd i mentioned before. since i can, im mentioning those series now!

#the rats rise again! - the aforementioned series, will be drawn if requested (you can mention it on the form in like the complaints area lol) #game theory minus the matpat - i talked about it before, the carrd has all the info you need, yeah #Paranormal Callings (And How We Got You Out) - while i do wanna start it, to me it makes more sense drawn out in a comic like style, and id need to make a couple so i dont feel bad on leaving it out

--

heres mutual/friend/family tags:

#jrwi by non jrwi enjoyer = im talking to my non just roll with it friend on just roll with it [will be used for them in general, not just jrwi, its just mostly jrwi] #epic artist = im talking about my niece #silly billy goose = im talking about my cousin #SEXY MOTORCYCLE!!! = ive finally given into urges and started talking about my lovely (ex gf now friend) (a nickname for them based off an old tumblr post thing i dont remember) (not really used here any more) #piss dolphin mutual = a fun tumblr mutual i have on here (based off a fanfic line they wrote) #soup bubbles on the blr = another fun mutual i know (accidentally called them soup when their nickname was soap, soap has bubbles to it, reblogging their posts puts them on my tumblr dash so blr) #my enablerrrrrr = FELIS TIME YAYAYAYAAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAAYYY ("enabled" by them to do stupid shit like writing silly things) (i also write fanfics so yeah)

have a question? check the carrd or just ask lol okay bye

starting a collection of images because i can:

^ tags can be found on @/okcoolthanks i just dont have the energy to link post

[squirreltastrophe]

About that pride-themed OC ask game, 3, 4, and 9 about Jinny and 19 in general?

3: How did your oc discover themself? Did something cause them to question, or did they always know?

I think Jinny always knew frankly? when Ophelia and Jinny first met they had babys first gay crush on each other for like a week (they're besties now :D). so that was definitely a big realization for both of them. however as far as labels go Jinny didn't put much thought into one for a long time. I don't think she puts much thought into labels still. she doesn't care all that much. she feels what she feels and she goes with what she's feeling!

4: Is your oc's environment supportive about their identity? How does this impact them?

well Jinny's friends are ofc :D. but outside of that I imagine she doesn't feel the most accepted ever. her identity doesn't come up in conversation often with adults and junk (there's no way she feels comfortable enough around adults to talk about ANY deeper part of herself, let alone that she's pansexual lol).

9: Are there cultural or lore specific aspects to their identity? If applicable, does their species affect it?

HMMM I don't think so? she lives in the underworld right she's a ghost. and to be completely honest I need to develop the culture of the underworld more xP. cause the architecture and fashion and stuff is definitely later 1800s inspired. but I don't want the underworld to share the ideals of the 1800s at all. x( I have some vague ideas though. I'll reblog this with a better answer to this question if I come up with one

16: Did you ever change an oc's identity when they were already established? Why?

surprisingly I don't think i've changed the identities of my ocs much? except Jinny very very recently. I need to update her ref to reflect this but I think she's definitely demiromantic/somewhere on the aroace spectrum :3

[notasapleasure]

Fic Writer 20 Questions

I've been tidying out my likes and remembered @elwenyere's open invitation tags on this, too, so here we go!

sshysmm's works on ao3 (user name is a ref to my old tumblr)

1) How many works do you have on ao3

128 (and I think I'm missing some of the band AU stuff I never moved over from the blog @theartistknownaslymond…)

2) What's your ao3 word count?

1,038,645 words. haha. what the fuck.

3) What fandoms do you write for?

Actively, right now: Star Wars (particularly Andor; previously Rogue One and a few spin-off novels), the Lymond Chronicles, and I do very much intend to return to my fics for And Then We Danced.

I have also written for Ripper Street, The Terror, The Musketeers (don't look! don't look! it's my 'now can i remember how to write fic after over a decade out of fandom fic) and Utopia (another one it would be cool to add to after I get a chance to rewatch).

4) What are your top five fics by kudos?

good god they're all Jyn/Cassian. it's the only big ship I've written for I suppose

Be alright tomorrow (Rogue One, Jyn/Cassian) Hope in the air (Rogue One, Jyn/Cassian) Singer, save our secular souls (Rogue One, Jyn/Cassian) To steal what she never could own (Rogue One, Jyn/Cassian) Delayed gratification (Rogue One, Jyn/Cassian)

5) Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to!! Sometimes when I'm deep in the writing hole I just stay away from ao3 so as not to ?? idk?? make myself feel guilty? get distracted? so it can take me a while to respond.

When people are reading updates as I post them I try to respond quicker! I like to respond to acknowledge how grateful I am to people who took the time to read and cheerlead and say something nice. To show I appreciate it and the time they spent on it. If it possibly leads to discussion about what's going on in the fic then so much the better!

6) What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably just Hope in the Air, for sticking with the canon Rogue One ending and leaning into the sense that even if he got to a bacta tank, Cassian's in a pretty bad way. Also Oh sleep! it is a gentle thing (Ripper Street), again for…following canon, dealing with Deborah's decision to stop seeing Reid and Emily's descent into a place where Reid feels he has to have her sent to the asylum.

7) What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Jerott wish-fulfilment!! The ransoun made, the prisoneris redeemit (Lymond Chronicles, Francis/Jerott).

8) Do you get hate on fics?

I don't think I've had any hate on ao3, no. Some blunt comments when I hadn't done my research on aurebesh well enough/resued a plot device, but not hate.

9) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Yes? All kinds? Idk, I'm trying to get more creative, though traditionally I think I write emotionally knotty, not-always-satisfying sex that does heavily lifting on the characterisation. And is also hot.

10) Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I haven't posted it on ao3 yet, but there's the Lymond Chronicles 1980s band AU crossover with And Then We Danced, which is just like. The nichest of nichey niches. Can't believe there are like three people who might read it, so it's still not as unpopular as a medieval Icelandic saga au of a niche Andor ship written in the first person. I didn't go out of my way to drive readers away, I swear!!! Please give The Saga of the Coal-biter and the Skraeling a chance, it's my precious baby.

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge, lol. I think more people would need to want to read my fics first.

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but I'm open to it if anyone wants! I have had two podfics made of my works, which has been lovely!

13) Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

No, though there was a fun Lymond Pawn in Frankincense AU which started as me and @erinaceina spit-balling about Philippa getting captured by GRM and Khaireddin surviving, and @stripedroseandsketchpads wrote some nice whumpy scenes about it!

14) What's your all time favorite ship?

Oh, usually whatever I'm writing at any given time. Faramir/Éowyn was formative influences, though.

15) What's a WIP you'd like to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I really don't like admitting that I don't think I'll finish something. I do have 17 subscribers(!!??) to a Lord Bateman (Child ballad 53) inspired Rogue One AU (What would you give?) so even though finishing that is very low down my priorities I'd hate to say outright that I wouldn't return to it.

16) What are your writing strengths?

Emotion, description, description of emotion… capturing micro-expressions and little tics that define a character. Because of this I think I'm pretty good at making people in-character even in weird settings. Writing people who aren't good or bad, just flawed and affected by their lived experiences. Creating an atmosphere. Also, when I pull it off, making you laugh one moment at something ridiculous and then sucker-punching you in the gut :')

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

That when I'm asked to think of my strengths I go blank. That I constantly, constantly overthink things when I've posted them in case I wrote something that will be horribly misunderstood or just actively bore established readers into giving up. The fear that what I enjoy writing is so inherently dull no one else will enjoy reading it, that I'm not setting out to 'write fic' but to write something pretentious and beautiful and that's not what anyone reads fic for. Also oh my god I need to learn brevity. Simple plots. Don't overthink the plot Jo. I what-if my plots to death and then find myself disgusted by all the ways they're inadequate. Actually what all this comes down to is a controlling urge in my writing: I want to control every detail of this scene, including where the information is lacking, and I worry that if I leave anything to chance I'll be misunderstood. But at the same time I love ambiguity and gaps and leaving things open to interpretation. Inside me there are two wolves and one adores unanswered questions while the other suffers from a neurodivergent urge to info-dump in order to make sure everything is clear.

18) Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I'd love to quote from Umberto Eco's author's note to The Name of the Rose, where he argued with his publisher about keeping Latin dialogue in! Ony my copy of the book is in storage. Also there's the whole…I'm a fan of the Lymond Chronicles. If there isn't untranslated dialogue in at least five different languages why are you bothering? And yeah I very much did learn a language because of a film and then spent a lot of time considering how communicating in this language as opposed to English would affect the dialogue and interactions I was writing. So yes, dialogue in another language when it's properly contextualised is good - not when it's random phrases of unnecessary Space Spanish because someone's exoticising Diego Luna.

19) First fandom you wrote for?

I'm of the generation where it was inevitably H*rry P*tter, if we're talking internet published fanfic. But as a kid I did keep diaries full of drawings and stories about Sandokan the tiger and Bucky O'Hare.

20) Favorite fic you've ever written?

I have like. Post-partum depression about the saga AU right now because seeing it interact with the world makes me doubt myself horribly, but realistically, it's my beloved child. It's just having to carry all my grad school trauma as well as all my past Star Wars fandom trauma and you know what?? It's good enough to do that. It is. It's the first of a trilogy, and I WILL finish the trilogy.

As previously said by elwenyere: Open tags for anyone who would like to play!!! This was very fun: @ me with your answers if you'd like to join. <3<3<3

[sui-imi]

UnderEats - progress report 1

First, thank you to all the new followers. Welcome!

Second, I've been brainstorming some ideas for UnderEats and wanted to talk a little about it. Like an update? Makes me feel like a Game Dev hahaha.

But before that, I did want to say that I'm thinking of creating an ask blog for the company. I would answer questions and post future art there, and have only UE-related content on it. But that will take a little while.

Back to the second point. I'll put it under a cut, since I'll probably start rambling.

The background and setting are main priority right now. I'm still working on some of the finer details (and honestly, I'm wondering if some of these details are a bit overkill haha?).

To clarify, UE isn't an Alternate Universe. It's a company that exists to connect different food services and different customers across the multiverse. It doesn't exist in any one AU, nor is it bound by one.

Despite this, I did want to give it a "home base" of sorts. Ink has the doodlesphere, Error has the antivoid, so UE should get a 'home' of it's own. Which it does! (... Once i draw it.)

I'm also working on the "how UE exists" and "why it exists" parts. The "how" is still WIP, partly because I'm struggling for ideas, partly because I don't want to write myself into a corner by going too in detail. But I'll figure it out. The "why" is... also WIP. The biggest reason is because of Exec.

Exec is actually pretty important. They built the company up, found people to help, found people to work, etc. They have motivations and rules to stick by. But then I have concepts for the story that become contradictory because of said motivations. But if I change the motivations, the story concepts don't make sense either! And I don't want them to just sit in the shadows, not really doing anything.

So Exec will probably need to be reworked. I don't know how major (I think a redesign at the very least...). But it's definitely important.

I also want to update everyone's refs at some point. Adding more details, changing the colours slightly, some needing redesigns, etc. As well as the new refs I need to make for side characters... Whew.

It's a lot to do, but I think writing it down like this helps me to visualise each step. I really do love this concept, and I don't want it to just be "Roo and some other characters" (though considering Sans' popularity it might be LOL) (which is fine if it is. But I still want to flesh out the idea). So good luck to me.

I think that's all. Thanks to anyone who read all this.

tl:dr; working on background and setting of UE, exec rework, more reference art & redrawing refs.

[of-ruins-and-rubble]

Intro + Rules

My Main account is @maydays-medbay

All posts will be tagged with IC response or OOC response for better organization

Below the cut will include information about the OCs related to this blog, and it will also have a list of every prompt currently open on the blog. This will hopefully make this blog easier to navigate :>

IDW is the continuity in which these characters are based off of, but I don't believe that the Ruination Corps. is so heavily tied to it that they couldn't be in other continuities as well.

If you would like, you could always mix in more than one character into an ask. For example, how one character would respond to a question for another character. You could also end up having two interacting depending on what you send. Or not! It's up to you what you want to ask my characters lol

This will be edited from time to time, and all updates will be stated at the top of this post.

[Character Info + Prompt list below]

Characters

Paradigm | Cannibal, Mnemosurgeon, Two-Faced Vitriol | They/Them, He/Him

Comprised of two individual bots, Jekyll and Hyde, and has two sparks in their frame

Both Jekyll and Hyde, when referred to individually, use He/Him pronouns

Hyde is the dominant of the two, more often being in control of the body and their motor functions

Hyde is cunning and overall an extremely manipulative individual, while Jekyll is more brutish and headstrong

They lead the Ruination Corps. alongside 5 other bots, though they are the overall "supreme" leader

Here are some images of what they look like: [X, Ref sheet] [X, Right]

Halcyon | Tactician, Chemist, Lurker in the Dark | They/He/It

One of the Salvific Six

Their tongue turns into a needle that they use to inject others with a variety of their dark concoctions, or suck fluids from objects

Has no optics on its face, though he does have sensors there...not to say that they don't have optics somewhere on their frame

Jaw can split open to grip onto things when using his needle

Here are some images of what they look like: [X, most recent] [X, Bottom Left] [X, Shows the needle appendage best]

Vyrox | Surveillance Officer, Analyst, Creator of Malware | Xe/Xem, Ey/Em, Any (Enby Pref)

Member of the Salvific Six, often considered Paradigm's Right Hand

Has an built-in system that lets em look through cameras and other surveillance devices- including comm units and other things of the like

Enjoys creating viruses that xe can use against other bots

Xe aren't afraid to get their hands dirty if ey have a duty that upholds the cause

Traitors will face Vyrox whether they like it or not, xe don't miss anything going on within xyr ranks

[Eir design needs to be reworked, so there are no references for em as of right now]

Turncoat | Infiltrator, Spy, Betrayer of All | He/Him

Salvific Six member

Turncoat is a shifter, able to morph his body structure into that of another bot relative to his size

Semi-Close with another Salvific six member named Reaver

Not known for his ability to keep relationships

Often does work for Vyrox as an informant. He's the least seen member after Vyrox since he's often adorning another bot's identity and off on work

Decent surgical knowledge thanks to his time posing as other bots within the field of medicine

Both an informant and an assassin

[There are no references for Turncoat as of now]

Reaver | Bodyguard, Brawler, Keeper of Tyranny | He/Him

Largest member of the Salvific Six

Has six arms, the smallest of which are called his tertiaries. They are able to be folded up and stored when he doesn't want to use them

Smooth voice and surprisingly outgoing for a member of the Salvific Six

Often wonders what his worth is to the Ruination Corps. and feels as though he's only appreciated for his size and strength

Morally Grey

[No current references for this character are available]

Serrous | Executioner, Render of Flesh | He/Him

Second largest member of the Salvific Six

Covered in saws. Arms, legs, torso, back- you name it. There's a saw there

No face, instead there's a maw of rotating blades, pincers, and- you guessed it- saws

Super quiet and collected. Often uses gestures instead of words

His brain module isn't actually in his head. Where is it? You'll never know :)

[No refs available]

Current Ask Games

Webkinz Themed Prompts [X, The questions here are pretty cool]

[etherealising]

ngl i was worried when i didn't see your reaction, glad you just missed the uploads!! hope you're doing great!!! ☺️

i was listening to “all i need to hear” by the 1975 today and it made me think of these two idiots. came to check on them and imagine my shock and excitement when i realized that i missed not one BUT TWO UPDATES?! i’ve been missing them so much and this chapter did not disappoint - although it did hurt like a mf🤠

yayy!!! i'm so happy you're getting caught up!! although i have to say, maybe save some of that hurt for the next chappie…

bear with me and my many many notes for this long and beautiful update🫶🏻

hahahaha 'bear' your many many updates are incredibly welcome! NEVER APOLOGIZE (please) 😇

GODDAMN!!! we’re just jumping straight into it! okay, okay, i see you lol. poor carmy - mikey is such an idiot (loving) for giving carmy something to be angsty at baby for

carmy is shaking in his boots that baby is working there and he isn't

maybe, JUST MAYBE, it’s because you look like a lovesick fool around baby you silly boy

he's just like hmm strange lady that one is

he is a lovesick FOOL. drawing her?? in the book SHE got him?? i’m dead fr.

right like bestie please get some help its embarrassing at this point! 🙃

i knew that going back in time would possibly mean some claire angst and the masochist in me loves it but i also need her to swiftly ✨get the fuck away✨

the masochist in me indeed loves it too and claire but i have to agree miss girl needs to bounce.

YOUCH. that one! that one hurt deep. the pain of unrequited (she thinks) love is other worldly.

it hurts so good! i forget half the angst i write my gosh does it bring me joy to hurt my own feelings sometimes.

broooooooo just tell her you love her already

DE NILE

tell me why my heart just dropped to my feet even though i already know they get separated? it’s so an odd feeling to know that it’s the beginning of the end while the characters are still in blissful ignorance

right!?!? like i knew this was coming, you knew this was coming, my neighbor knew this was coming and it's still so heartbreaking.

have you even lived life if you haven’t experienced the PAIN of having to say this sentence. ouch.

LICHERALLY this sentence has been in my vocabulary for far too long.

i was 🤏🏼 this close to throwing hands with carmy until i read this paragraph… boi is on THIN ICE still though

i know you know the outcome…but the ice is non-existent.

okay but this sentence has me fully melted on the floor - i love tina and i love the idea that baby is family to the beef family just as much as the berzatto family. this will definitely make things interesting when carmy takes over the beef in da future.

it wouldn't be a bear fic without the quintessential found family aspect.

oooooooh yeah. carmys going to get his ass kicked in the future i’m calling it now.

carmy said if i ignore my problems they simply cease to exist.

jesus christ this hurts so good - you just know this is one of those moments that just HAUNTS baby after he dies. these words are never leaving her fr.

lot of things concerning our big bro mikey won't be leaving her…

LOL too bad its going to fall on deaf ears

carmy: but she looks so good walking away from me 🥸

the way that baby has all but asked him to prom and this idiot is still nervous to ask her

laid the 'invitation' on a silver platter and he's still giggling and kicking his feet back and forth.

it’s okay king we’re all delusional

thinks about baby in the most romantic ways possible but doesn't want to go with her romantically????

NO HE DIDNT. NO HE FUCKING DIDNT. okay i take it all back i’m gonna pummel him for this. shaking my DAMN HEAD.

i'll ref the fight (my moneys on you)

honestly i’m team hayden for this - carmy should be taking notes

hayden is winning everyone's hearts at this point!

okay so he’s safe from getting pummeled for now since hes just a stupid dumb boy but he’s still on thin ice.

claire saw her opportunity and took it

i think at this point i need to just kick his ass because everytime he gets out of a hole he jumps into a deeper one w t f

at this point i think we all collectively deserve to beat this boy up, the line starts behind you!

how supremely ironic and hypocritical of him

someone get this kid a psychic

i absolutely love this paragraph and how well it shows the complexities surrounding baby’s feelings about claire. just really really well written. and also OUCH.

thank you!!! baby tries so hard not to blame claire and make this a girl v girl thing because like it shouldn't be

on a scale of 1-10 how bad of a person am i for thinking ‘full offense to claire’ with no hesitation

you said it out loud, but i sure was thinking it

THEY REALLY ARE TWEEDLE DEE AND TWEEDLE DUMB THEY ARE THEY ARE

one collective brain cell between these besties!

i am laughing so hard at this oh my god - i love them so much it hurts. i’m reallllllllly not excited to say goodbye to the dynamic duo😞

their little quips are so fun to write goodness i'm gonna cry when mikey is gone 😅

methinks that this is going to come into play later lolololol

methinks you might just be right…

i want to watch this carmy brawl with future carmy because future carmy did a shit job at this

future carmy ain't no betta

the way i can’t even be happy about this because i know the amount of absolute shit he’s about to put her through

same i was like let me finish this scene cause i know it ain't no happy ending

i do, however, love this. i love how intimate and real it is - first kisses are awkward but that’s what makes them so fun

right two little awko tacos in love but too stupid to do anything more about it

i feel some bullshit brewing and i am shaking in my boots

the chanel boots?

wowwwwwwwww that didn’t take long. i’m not even surprised but goddamn does it hurt all the same.

boy really pulling a hannah montana right now smh

crying in the walk-in builds character😤 #hotgirlshit

someone trap carmy in there a few years early please!!

this is such an incredible last paragraph - i am unfortunately all fucked up in the brain from carmys dumbassery lol. boys gonna have to put in some serious work in the future - he is truly his own worst enemy

that carmy x self-sabotage tag working real hard lately

i know I say it every time but i freaking love reading your reactions soo much they make my heart happy 😭😭

interlude one | parle-moi

↢ previous chapter | next chapter ↣

pairing(s): carmy x claire | fem!reader x male!oc | carmy x fem!reader | platonic!mikey x fem!reader | platonic!richie x fem!reader | platonic!claire x fem!reader |

summary: a glance into the final couple of weeks of carmy and baby's senior year.

warning(s): 18+ | miscommunication | carmy | teenage angst | teenage stupidity | mentions of prom | vague mentions of terminal illness | steamy make out session | dry humping | mild petting | neck infatuation? | pining | semi-unrequited love | idiots in fucking love | please let me know if i missed something |

wc: 13.7k

song inspo: parle-moi

please don't let any graphics hinder your imagination of fem!reader/baby, you could imagine her as a fucking smurf for all i care. any pictures used are NOT a representation of baby they just fit the chapter!!!!

also i describe hayden as atj's character in kick-ass because that's what i was watching while writing this chapter but you could imagine him as rasputin or liteally whoever you're into.

but also like atj and jaw are literally the same person just different fonts ya know? happy reading!

May 2013

Carmy watched as you manned the front of house at The Beef, you and Richie working seamlessly around each other as the both of you took turns at the cash register and running food to the customers who had decided to dine in. Carmy wouldn’t lie, he was a little miffed that Mikey had given you a job here but strictly forbade him from even thinking about working at The Beef, but it was okay because he had a plan. Carmy was going to pursue his dream of becoming a chef, not only that, he was going to become the best fucking chef he could be and prove to Michael exactly why he deserved to work alongside him at the family business.

It wasn’t necessarily fair for Carmy to be mad at you for earning yourself a job at The Beef, and he wasn’t. He knew you were only working there to save up money, he knew how badly you and your mom needed it. Things had gotten worse with your mom in the past two years. One of your aunts had come from the west coast to stay with the two of you as you finished up your senior year waiting to whisk the two of you away at the first chance she got. Carmy had met her a handful of times. She was nice he would give her that, but she always looked at him like she knew a secret he didn’t.

Leaning against the end of the counter as he waited for you to go on break, he watched as you made your way back from the dining area to the front, doing his best to capture your features. The slight sheen to your skin from running back and forth and the slight humidity that could be felt in the air. He took notice of the way your hair decorated your head, which pieces looked out of place. Carmy studied you with a curious eye, fingers drumming against the small sketchbook you had got him for his birthday. He had wanted to draw you for a while, and he tried once, but after picking out everything wrong with the drawing he decided that maybe your kind of features weren’t meant to be confined to the lines on a piece of paper.

Carmy watched as you laughed at something stupid Richie said, your laughter singing through the restaurant. Even as you turned to the window of the kitchen to share the joke with the rest of your crew, the large smile still hadn’t left your face.

You turned from the window removing the apron from around your waist as you approached Carmy, the remnants of laughter still on your face. You grabbed his hand pulling him along to the dining area where the two of you plopped down at your favorite corner table. The patrons are still there sending greetings to both of you. You nodded at Carmy’s sketchbook that now sat on the table, his hand lying flat atop it.

“Got anything new for me to look at?” You eyed the small book, always happy to look at whatever new drawing had taken over Carmy’s mind, even if they were of Claire.

Carmy followed your line of sight, a slight blush rising to his cheeks at your intrigue. He usually wouldn’t think twice about letting you parse through his artwork, your genuine interest always pushing him to keep up his hobby. “Uh, I’m not sure if you’ll want to see what’s in this sketchbook.”

Carmy’s fingers began drumming away again, the constant contact with the small book keeping him calm. You sent a teasing smile his way “Why afraid I’ll get tired of seeing your drawings of Claire?” You had meant for the quip to be a joke, although you were tired of seeing Claire’s face staring back at you through Carmy’s drawings, it wasn’t your friend's fault that she had stolen the heart of the boy you had been pining after for the better part of a year.

The frown on Carmy’s face told you that he may have taken offense to the slight joke, your teasing smile dropping as you felt the guilt creep in on you. “I don’t draw Claire that much do I?” The vulnerability in his tone catches you off guard.

You quickly shook your head wanting to appease him, “No Carm, guess I’ve just been around Mikey and Richie too much working here.” You sent him a small smile hoping to raise his spirits, “Word of advice though, some people might find it a bit weird if they knew someone was drawing them without their permission.” You leaned your head on the palm of your hand as you watched Carmy flush even more.

Carmy felt the heat of his blush rising on his neck and painting his cheeks an even deeper red, of course, you would think he was weird for randomly drawing your friend. His lack of experience and newfound fascination channeled into his drawings as he saw no other way to deal with his crush on Claire. He cleared his throat, eyes finding yours again, “Would you?” At the confusion on your face he swallowed, not wanting you to think him any weirder than he already felt, “Would you find it weird if I was drawing you?”

You watched Carmy sink into himself after asking you that question, your own heart melting a bit about the shyness Carmy exuded. “Carmen,” your hands reach out to clasp his between your own, “I would be flattered if you ever decided to draw me. Hell, maybe I’ll even commission you.” The ending joke is made to bring yourself back to reality, if Carmy was drawing you it wasn’t for the same reasons he was drawing Claire.

If it was possible for Carmy to blush even more, he was sure he would’ve looked like a tomato sitting in front of you. You always knew exactly what to say to stave his self-doubt, but recently your words had been more warming to him, something that he couldn’t explain. But he found himself hanging on to every word that left your lips a little bit more.

Before Carmy could get his response out Tina appeared by your table with two signature beef sandwiches for the two teenagers she had watched grow up. The two of you thanked her watching as she made her way back into the kitchen, not being able to spare a minute with the dinner rush starting soon.

You smiled up at Carmy before digging into your food, the warm bread and the seasoned beef caressed your tongue. You let out a sound of appreciation as you swallowed your first bite head tossing back to savor the flavors in your mouth. Carmy let out a small chuckle as he watched you, always finding your reaction to be overdramatic, he wouldn’t lie though, he was excited for the day he would earn that same reaction after you tried his food.

A content sigh escaped your lips as you wiped your mouth with the provided napkin, “I’m gonna miss this when I’m gone.” Carmy could hear the sadness in your voice, his own sense of sadness filling him as he remembered what fate held for the two of you after graduation. The two of you would be separated from each other in what felt like the first time in forever.

Carmy sat his sandwich down, slumping a little in his seat while trying his best not to bring the mood down, “You leave at the end of July right?” His question met your ears as you took in his kicked-puppy look, you remembered how well Carmy took the news when he found out. The betrayal on his face when he found out you chose to go to a college on the West Coast.

You nodded your eyes not meeting his as you tried to lessen the hurt in your heart. It's not like you wanted to be that far from Carmy but it really was out of your hands. Your mom and aunt decided it would be best to be closer to family amid your mom’s ever-declining health. “Yeah Carm, our flight leaves on the 31st.”

You took another bite out of your sandwich appetite dwindling, but not wanting to waste the food you know the crew loved making. The two of you finished your sandwiches in silence, neither of you wanting to talk about the future and more than happy just to sit in the other’s presence.

Reaching for Carmy’s plate you stacked your own on top of his before moving them onto the edge of the table, ready to take them when your break came to an end in five minutes. You sat up straighter in your seat imbuing yourself with confidence as you prepared yourself to broach the topic you weren’t sure Carmy even cared for.

“So Carm, prom is coming up, have you given it any thought?” Carmy knew you were trying to come across as nonchalant, but the gleam in your eyes told him otherwise. Hiding the small smile that graced his lips, he watched as you tried hard to act as though you didn’t care about prom. It was a bit funny to him.

“You know it's not really my scene Baby,” he watched as your shoulders slumped a bit. You had been expecting his answer so you weren’t sure why it affected you so much

You nodded your head, “Yeah, you’re right. Not sure why I brought it up.” You began playing with your fingers, you aren’t sure what you were hoping would be different this time compared to the other times you had brought it up to him. You knew Carmy wasn’t interested in you romantically, and you knew he wasn’t interested in going to prom, but you were holding out hope thinking he might pity you and join you at prom as your friend as one last hurrah before your big move.

Carmy felt bad, he didn’t mean to make you sad. He was just waiting for the right time to ask you. He knew how much prom meant to you, and had listened to you talk his ear off about going to your high school prom after your mom and his mom showed you pictures from their respective proms. He was still working up the confidence to do so though, every time he thought he was ready he would overhear the idiots in his homeroom with their own plans to ask you. Thankfully though you had rejected every advance, and what kind of friend would Carmy be if he asked you to prom at the dinghy sticky table in the back of his family’s business?

“I’ll think about it okay?” It was Carmy’s turn to reach for your hands, to assuage the sadness he could see overtaking your features. Your eyes met Carmy’s not sure if you had heard him correctly, you wouldn’t allow yourself to get too excited at the prospect that Carmy might want to attend the prom.

You sent Carmy a small smile and a nod before standing up from your seat and grabbing the two dishes still sitting on the table, “I’ll hold you to that Bear.” You headed towards the door to the kitchen disappearing from Carmy’s sight.

It was always odd for Carmy to hear you use that nickname for him. You had usually just stuck to ‘Carmen’ or ‘Carmy’ when you were feeling extra friendly. But hearing you call him ‘Bear’ always made his heart beat a little faster, the way the nickname left your lips making him feel warm on the inside. Knowing that such a special nickname had countlessly graced your tongue, a family name just for him that you had felt comfortable enough calling him always made his head fuzzy and his chest feel like it was on fire. The sound of the bell above the door snapped him out of his thoughts, he quickly gathered up his sketchbook, he didn’t know where he was headed, but hopefully, some fresh air would give him the courage he needed to finally ask you to prom.

Your shift ended an hour ago, but you always stayed later to help the crew clean up. Mikey began giving you rides home as you took on more hours, the one plus side of working for your neighbor. At that moment Tina was helping you clean the front of the house her favorite oldies CD popped into the ancient radio, the two of you had created a tradition since you started working at The Beef. Tina would shoo Richie to the back to clean her area so the two of you could catch up.

Tina had taken you under her wing when you first started working there, teaching you what she could in her spare time. Although you had no plans to work in a kitchen anytime soon, you still cherished the time spent together taking what she taught you and using them in your kitchen. Happily sharing with Tina what your mom thought about a recipe she taught you and bringing one of your mom's famous recipes for Tina to try.

Being able to connect your mom and your work mom through food always brought warmth to your heart. The women in your life all doing their best to raise you to be the best woman you could be. As you and Tina finished cleaning up, the two of you headed to the dining area where you would usually wait for Mikey as he finished up whatever he was doing in his office and Tina would sometimes keep you company.

The two of you occupied the same table that had earlier housed you and Carmy. “So did Carmy get his head out of his ass and ask you to prom?” The smile on Tina’s face showed how excited she was to hear about your progress in getting Carmy open to going to prom.

You hid your face in your hands, your big smile hiding behind it, “He told me he’d think about it, which isn’t a no but, I’m too scared to get my hopes up,” You smiled in Tina’s direction watching as she nodded the smile never leaving her face.

“Mama, why don’t you just ask him yourself?” Tina questioned searching your eyes, your smile faltered as you listened to Tina’s question, why hadn’t you just asked Carmy? It would’ve given you a straight answer, and you wouldn’t have had to wait around while he was being indecisive.

Your eyebrows pinched together as you looked at Tina in earnest, “But what if he says no?” The self-doubt creeping in, of course, you would ask him as friends, you didn’t want to freak him out but insinuating you wanted something more, even though you did.

Tina shrugged her shoulders, a small warm smile decorating her features “You can’t control his reaction Mija.” She leaned forward to clasp your hands in hers, “If you don’t ask you’ll never know.” You could always count on Tina’s solid advice to ground you.

And she was right the worst thing that could happen if you asked Carmy to the prom was his swift rejection. But the answer would always be rejection if you never asked. Tina squeezed your hands as you nodded, letting her words sink in as you calculated the best way to ask Carmy to prom.

“I see the way you look at him mama, and listen,” one of her hands shot out to raise your chin so you were looking at her directly. “It’s going to hurt if he doesn’t feel the same way, but you can’t keep living ya life waiting for him. You can be there for him as much as you want, that’s fine ma, but at the end of the day you gotta remember you’re the only person who got you.”

You could feel the tears on your waterline threatening to spill out, leave it to Tina to serve you the most heartfelt advice on a random Thursday night at a dining table at The Beef.

“I’m not saying you gotta let go of your feelings for him, just don’t lose yourself waiting for that boy to come to his senses.” With that Tina patted your hands as she stood from her seat, coming to your side of the table and planting a loving kiss on your forehead.

“You get home safe now ma, a’ight, make sure Mikey ain’t driving all stupid with you in that car.” You laughed at the jab Tina made about Mikey’s driving.

Standing up the two of you embraced each other in a hug, you were grateful to have Tina in your, and you were grateful to have met the Berzattos because without them you wouldn’t have been able to make all the wonderful connections you have now.

You waited for Tina to grab her stuff so you could walk her out. The two of you exiting The Beef you stood outside the entrance watching Tina as she made her way down the street, waiting until her petite figure was officially out of your sight before heading back inside and locking the door behind you.

Venturing to the back you stopped in the office doorway, Mikey sitting in the desk chair as Richie leaned against the desk the two of them whispering fiercely between each other. You gently knocked on the wall hoping to catch their attention, you learned the hard way that being privy to any whispered conversation these two had was never worth it.

“Uh, I’m ready when you are Mikey,” you looked between the two of them, the two giving off a more sketchy vibe than they usually did.

“You uh, didn’t hear anything you weren’t supposed to did you?” Richie’s question caused you to frown. They were definitely doing some sketchy shit that you wanted no part in.

You rolled your eyes before bending down to pick up your backpack on the floor next to the door. “You two are so fucking weird,” you crossed your arms over your chest as you looked between the two of them. Mikey finally rose from his seat and tossed you the keys that were sitting on the desk.

“Hey! That’s rude you know, I think I’m fucking great,” Richie’s response caused a tired smile to form on your lips.

“Yeah Rich, you can be cool sometimes. Goodnight Rich, get home safe.” You sent a small wave his way before leading the way to the car parked in the back of the lot, wanting nothing more than to get home, shower, and bundle up in your warm bed.

You unlocked your door before quickly sliding in and reaching over to unlock Mikey’s door. Silently rushing him along and immediately turning on the heat as Mikey settled into his seat reversing out of the lot.

“What were you and Richie even doing anyway?” You looked over in Mikey’s direction as your hands were placed in front of the vents supplying warmth to your body.

Mikey smiled at you before facing the road again your curiosity was always something he could count on, “Just keeping the business afloat. Nothing to worry over.” You nodded along, no stranger to the many problems The Beef ran into. It shocked you sometimes that it was still up and running, but you knew Mikey always found a way to keep things going.

“How’s school?” The question gained your attention, one of these talks is almost mandatory between the two of you, Mikey checking in on you and in a not-so-subtle way checking in on Carmy through you. You couldn’t pretend you knew why it was so hard for them to just talk to each other, but you guessed any effort was effort.

“Alright, I guess, just preparing for finals. Oh, guess what?” The giddiness in your voice earned a chuckle from Mikey as he nodded for you to go on. “I’m planning to ask Carmy to prom, but like as friends you know?” It was a bit ironic that every Berzatto except the one that mattered knew about your crush, but according to them, you weren’t very subtle about it.

Mikey’s laugh crumbled your resolve a bit, you weren’t sure if he was laughing at you or your idea. You flicked his shoulder sure he couldn’t feel it through his jacket, he raised his hand as a way to ward off your attack. Not that it was doing anything to hurt him.

You watched as Mikey pulled into your driveway never forcing you to cross the street on late nights. His hand reached for the ignition turning the car off as he shifted to face you in his seat.

“You know I’m proud of you right?” you nodded as you listened to Mikey’s words. “You’re gonna do big fucking things, Baby, don’t forget about us little guys alright.” You laughed a little confused about where this topic of conversation was coming from.

“I could never forget about you Brother Bear.” You teased the childhood nickname you gave Mikey pulling his lips into a smile. “I’m gonna write about you one day Mikey, gotta remember you to do that.” You watched as he just stared at you eyes roaming over your face, you reached across the console pressing a quick kiss on his cheek before moving to get out of the car.

Mikey’s hand reached out to grab your arm, “You gonna look out for Carmy even when you leave right?” You nodded at the question, feeling no need to elicit a verbal response. “Just keep an eye out for me will you, you’re good for Carmy.” You had no plans to cut Carmy off after your move, the two of you already discussed the best ways to keep in contact, the best season to catch a flight in.

“Come on now Mikey, you Berzatto’s are stuck with me for life, you can’t get rid of me that easily.” You laughed as Mikey rolled his eyes

“Get your ass in the house, Baby, I told your mom I’d stop bringing you home so late,” you nodded, picking your backpack up from by your feet on the floor. You quickly walked to your front door turning back to send Mikey a wave as he watched you get in safely.

Mikey sighed as he easily parked the car in his driveway just across the street. It was selfish but he needed you to stay in Carmy’s life in whatever way you could manage. Carmy would need you, the role you played in his life making him a better person than he already was. Mikey just hoped for your sake that Carmy put in the effort to keep you in his life, his little brother honing in on the Berzatto family habit of self-sabotage.

Mikey would speak to Carmy about it, if there was one thing he would get his little brother to understand, it was that allowing you to walk out of his life would be a colossal mistake.

Carmy was waiting for you in front of the school. Since getting your licenses the two of you had been taking turns driving the other to school, and today was his turn. He knew it would take you a good minute to make your way to the entrance since your class was located at the back of campus. It didn’t bother him though, it gave him a chance to try and calm his nerves. There was one week left until prom and he still hadn’t asked you.

He purchased the tickets a week ago. You had given him the perfect opportunity at lunch when you decided to spend the period getting help from your creative writing teacher.

Carmy just never felt like it was the right time to ask you, at least that’s what he was telling himself. In reality, he had plenty of opportunities, he just kept losing his confidence. Forcing him to constantly postpone the question he so desperately wanted answered.

For example, when he was visiting with your mom over the weekend and you were teaching him your mom’s famous peach cobbler recipe. He swore he was gonna ask you in the midst of baking, he knew you were into romantic gestures. Not that he wanted to go to prom with you romantically or anything like that. But then the two of you made a mess with the flour while trying to perfect your mom's homemade biscuits, flour getting everywhere including on the two of you.

Carmy decided as he watched you clean your face that right then was as perfect a moment as ever. The two of you were in high spirits enjoying each other's company, but then he watched as the evening light streamed through the kitchen window just perfectly. The sunlight lit up the features on your face he had somehow been overlooking for all the years he knew you. Your bright eyes and cheeky smile were solely trained on him.

And there he was standing in your mom’s kitchen, drowning in the attention you had always allotted especially for him. His smile faltered as he couldn’t help but just watch you at that moment, his breath hitched while his eyes skated over the planes of your face, the ache in his chest slowly dwindling his confidence. And Carmy decided he just couldn’t ask you that day. The timing wasn’t right. The two of you were a mess and he needed to find a bottle of Pepto Bismol asap.

So that’s how he ended up nervously waiting for you to exit school on a random Monday in May. Carmy made sure he was in the regular meeting spot as you two had dedicated it, out of the way of any other students. The two of you weren’t loners, well you weren’t, Carmy didn’t care too much for high school labels. But the two of you were fine being in each other’s presence with no need to include anyone else, and yeah sometimes you would run off with Claire or Hayden and try to invite Carmy, but Carmy didn’t need any of that. He got you and your attention every day of the week whenever he wanted, and for Carmy, that’s all he really needed.

Carmy finally spotted you making your way through the crowd of teenagers who were either waiting for their rides or just trying to prolong the day with their friends. An unconscious smile graced his features he had been waiting all day to finally just get things over with and pop the question. The two tickets held so tightly in his hands they were starting to crinkle. Letting out a deep breath, Carmy straightened up, wanting you to take his inquiry seriously, not sure his usual shyness would exhibit that he truly wanted to go to prom with you.

No longer able to wait, Carmy began walking in your direction, doing his best to avoid the bodies that didn’t care enough to pay attention to him. He made it halfway before the sight in front of him caused him to abruptly stop. Walking next to you was the tall boy he always felt himself feeling insecure around. Hayden had never shown Carmy any ill will and had even tried to include Carmy in conversation in the times he joined the two of you for lunch. But the teenager had something Carmy didn’t have; a reserve of confidence and natural charisma. The two of you had just met this year in your creative writing class and Carmy swore he would never hear the end of it.

Hayden was drinking in all your attention right now, the two of you bouncing ideas off of each other for your creative writing final. You thought Hayden was cool since your first meeting at the beginning of the year. The two of you became instant critique buddies, always asking the other to analyze a class assignment before you submitted it. At times you had thought about inviting him to hang out with you and Carmy outside of school, but you didn’t want to make Carmy uncomfortable, so the two of you remained friends inside the confines of high school.

You laughed at one of Hayden’s outlandish ideas, knowing if he turned in a paper on the topic of whatever conspiracy theory he was into at the moment they would probably withhold his diploma.

“Hey, check it out,” your eyes followed the path Hayden’s finger was pointing at, a small scowl painting your face at the scene playing out in front of you. “Looks like Carmy finally asked Claire to prom.” The words made your ears buzz, and the tickets in your back pocket felt like they were on fire now.

The two of you watched in silence as Carmy and Claire traded shy smiles with each other before he handed her one of the two tickets in his hands. When he told you he’d think about it, you weren’t aware he would think about going with someone else. The hope in your heart immediately died out as you watched the bright smile overtake Carmy’s face. You didn’t blame him, if you had the opportunity to go to prom with your crush, you obviously would have taken it too.

“You good?” The nudge to your arm broke you from your longing gaze, eyes finding Hayden’s through his dorky glasses. You nodded trying to shake the sadness off yourself, Hayden was great at reading people.

“Yeah, actually,” you took a small breath before continuing. “I know this is kind of weird, and you’re totally allowed to reject me. But would you maybe wanna go to prom with me? It doesn’t have to mean anything obviously, just two friends having a good time together.” You slipped the two tickets out of your back pocket brandishing them to Hayden. Even if you couldn’t go with Carmy you still wanted to attend prom and Hayden was a great second choice.

“Hell yeah! I’ve been waiting for you to ask me.” The lame joke caused the both of you to laugh as you shoved Hayden’s shoulder. He took one of the tickets from your hand walking backwards while still facing you. “Don’t sell yourself short, maybe I want to go to prom with you to mean something.” His loud voice catches the attention of the teenagers surrounding you. A group of underclass girls fawning over how cute they thought the scene between you two was.

You watched as Hayden disappeared to his car, a small laugh leaving your lips at Hayden’s antics, a part of you feeling giddy at the idea that someone wanted to go to prom with you as more than friends.

Carmy wasn’t sure how long he stood there staring at the interaction going on between you and Hayden, but it sure did suck the confidence right out of his insecure body. The thought of going to prom with you was just another failed idea as he was sure Hayden would ask you.

“You okay there Berzatto?” Carmy was snapped out of his trance by the presence that made their way to his side. His eyes shot to Claire’s, momentarily widening before he tried to calm his exterior. He nodded his head, giving himself a minute before even thinking of gracing Claire with an incoherent response.

“Ye-Yeah, just waiting for Baby,” his free hand raised to point in your direction as Claire smiled at him, eyes leaving him for only a moment. He dropped his hand not knowing how to continue the conversation, Claire was your friend and yeah he did have his fair share of classes with her, and she did only live down the street from the two of you. But he had never been alone with her on purpose.

The two of them stood in a stilted silence, both overcome by their shyness to say anything. Trying to ease the awkwardness Claire’s eyes landed on the tickets still tightly grasped in Carmy’s hands, finally finding an out to the silence. “I didn’t know you were into prom Carmy,” the statement reminded Carmy of what he had been planning to do in the first place.

One hand raised to run through his slightly grown-out hair, head nodding rapidly in response, “Yeah, Baby seems to be really into it.” Carmy didn’t notice Claire’s smile falter, of course, he was taking you to prom, you were the only girl that existed to him.

Carmy finally faced the girl standing next to him. The least he could do while waiting for you was hold a conversation with her. “Did you want to go?” Carmy watched Claire’s smile brighten, a confused look painting his features. Not realizing that with his overall awkward and shy personality, the girl in front of him thought this was his way of asking her to prom.

“With you?” She questioned the giddiness in her voice, easy to point out. Carmy’s eyes widened this time, this was definitely not his original plan. But he couldn’t just say no and turn her down he would’ve felt bad, plus he did have a huge crush on her, and Mikey and Richie had both told him to stop being such a pussy when it came to girls. So Carmy realized he had his answer.

“Yeah with me, i-if you want to I mean,” Carmy waited with bated breath hoping he hadn’t read the situation wrong. If Claire’s blush and wide smile were any indication he was on the right track. He raised the hand that contained the tickets between the two of them, plucking one out and offering it to Claire.

Their hands brushed as she reached for the ticket, Carmy’s smile matching hers as they fell into polite small talk about their day and their plans for after graduation.

“Don’t sell yourself short, maybe I want going to prom with you to mean something,” the sound of what they both knew to be Hayden’s voice drew their attention. They watched the fading interaction between you and Hayden, Carmy’s attention zeroing in on a laugh he heard over a hundred times.

The squeeze on his bicep removed his attention from you, eyes falling back to the girl he had just asked to prom, albeit accidentally. “They’re so cute! I can’t believe they’re going to prom together,” Claire’s excitement had somehow increased after Hayden’s obnoxious display. “Hey, maybe we can carpool,” It was wrong but Carmy couldn’t get himself to focus on the words leaving Claire’s mouth, too busy watching you watch Hayden.

“Oh hey, my mom’s here. We’ll figure it out later, see ya Carmy.” He sent a noncommittal nod in Claire’s direction, a slight wave sent to her mom who was patiently waiting in the car. Eyes immediately went back to your figure that had finally begun to make its way in his direction, the smile on your face confusing him. You didn’t like Hayden did you?

Carmy watched as you stopped in front of him before your hand reached out to shove his shoulder, “Why didn’t you tell me you were asking Claire to prom?” Carmy wasn’t sure why but your question irked him, the excitement in your voice crawling under his skin. It’s not like he had to run his whole life by you, you obviously didn’t.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were asking Hayden to prom?” The hostility in Carmy’s tone and the frown on his face confused you, “You just asked him to prom so he’ll sleep with you.” Your eyes widened at Carmy’s insinuation that the only reason anyone would go to prom with you was to fulfill their carnal desires.

You scoffed rolling your eyes at his immaturity, “You have an ugly fucking attitude, Carmen.” The shove of your shoulder into his as you stormed off to the car cooled his anger down.

Carmy had no clue what the fuck had been going on with him, with the two of you recently. But he knew he needed to cool it with these mood swings before you decided to leave him behind for good. He only had you for the rest of the summer before your constant presence in his life would disappear. He didn’t want to give you a reason to cease all contact after your move. Carmy followed after you knowing it would be a silent car ride home.

Prom Night | Saturday

The week leading up to prom had been the most awkward week between you and Carmy since the dawn of your friendship. It's not like you were giving him the cold shoulder, but you sure weren’t as nice and friendly as you usually were with him. You only spoke to him out of necessity that week, your friendship with him on rocky ground after the accusation he threw your way.

It had gotten so bad that you had even begun inviting Claire and Hayden to your’s and Carmy’s self-proclaimed lunch table. You had told Carmy it was under the guise of figuring out the plans for prom night, but you just didn’t want to sit alone with Carmy as he acted like everything was fine between the two of you. And Carmy knew two, and if he was brave enough he would’ve admitted that it hurt to see you so upset with him to the point that you were no longer comfortable in just his presence.

He had even broached the topic to Sugar, hoping she would be able to give him advice since she was a teenage girl at one point, and probably understood your thought process better than he did. He regretted the decision immediately when she explained to him that because of the situation, he should be more worried about the way his words hurt you, rather than his feelings of you distancing yourself from him. She had gone on a long tangent about how you had every right to want space from him, the two of you were longtime best friends, and having someone you trust with your whole life deduce you to just your body would make anyone question the friendship. Carmy learned the hard way that Sugar wasn’t going to tell him what he wanted to hear just to make him feel better.

It was a tough week for Carmen Berzatto and it was nobody's fault but his own. Sitting on his bed he stared at the suit he would be donning tonight, the excitement he once held for prom, slowly dwindling with every smile you saved for Hayden that week. Every time you asked for Hayden’s advice before Carmy’s he felt his resolve cracking, for a constant time in his life your friendship with him was the only thing that truly belonged to him.

He wasn’t used to having to share your attention with anyone outside of his and your family. He wasn’t prepared for the smile he thought was reserved just for him, to so easily graced your lips when speaking with Hayden

You and Claire were getting ready together at your house, you had invited the girl to join you after she explained her mom would be out of town for a business meeting. The friendship between the two of you was still rather new, you wouldn’t go as far as to call her your best friend, but she was your first close girlfriend and you thought that counted for something.

Claire was easy to be friends with. She was a sweet girl with a bright personality and the two of you wondered how you had lived on the same street all this time and never became friends before senior year. Claire was easy to be friends with; that is until Carmy decided he liked her. After that day it was no longer just you and Carmy, it was you, Carmy, and Claire. And Claire was never even actually physically there, she was just a topic of conversation that Carmy couldn’t go a day without somehow bringing up.

You didn’t blame Claire though, how could you? And just as naturally you watched as your new friend fell for your oldest one. It hurt in the beginning to realize Carmy would never speak of you the way he spoke of Claire, but as time went on you got over it, the mantra ‘if Carmy’s happy, I’m happy’ slowly getting you through senior year. But it was agonizing when Claire confessed to you she had fallen for your shy doe-eyed shadow.

Luckily for you though the two of them were too shy to ever do anything about it. And maybe you were a shit friend for not telling Carmy that he did have a chance with his dream girl, but you would’ve been an even worse friend for revealing Claire’s secret behind her back. It was a lose-lose situation. So now you were relegated to being the middleman, lending both of your friends an ear to talk about their infatuations with each other.

And that’s exactly what you were doing right now as you listened to Claire drone on about how sweet Carmy was. And how cute he looked when he asked her to prom, and if you thought he would look good in his suit tonight; which yes, you did but Claire didn’t need to know that. You were almost starting to regret inviting her over, but you had to remind yourself it wasn’t her fault that you were too scared to admit your feelings to Carmy, or that you should’ve just asked Carmy to prom yourself with no hesitation.

“Which color?” Claire’s voice broke you from your pity party, the two of you sitting on the floor in front of your mirror, your respective makeup set out in front of you. You looked at the two eyeshadow palettes Claire was pointing at, quickly pointing at the one color palette that would work best with her blue-green eyes.

“I think these colors will make your eyes pop,” the small smile on your lips encouraging Claire to take your advice. “Can I be honest with you?” You were unsure that you wanted to have this conversation with Claire, but you’d always have Carmy’s best interest at heart.

Claire shifted to face you, your serious tone drawing her undivided attention. “Just be careful with Carmy, okay?” Your eyes flickered between hers to make sure she understood the gravity of what you were saying. “Not in a bad way or anything, it's just…he really likes you. And he’s not that experienced in the romance department, so just don’t expect too much of him,” you paused, eyes going down to watch as your fingers picked at the hem of your robe.

“He’s shy, ya know, and he’s a little self-conscious even though he does not need to be because he’s so cool once you get to know him. But if he seems a little clueless or doesn’t pick up on your queues, just don’t hold it against him okay? I know he’s going to try not to mess things up with you Claire.”

Your eyes found Claire’s face again, a small endearing smile on her lips, “You care about him a lot.” You laughed not meaning for it to sound as sarcastic as it came across, you did a lot more than care about Carmy. “I’m glad Carmy has a friend like you in his life,” Claire’s hand patted your knee, the truth in her words causing your heart to sink a little in your chest.

“Enough about me and Carmy, I didn’t know you were into Hayden!” The two of you giggled about the fact you were talking about boys and getting ready for prom, neither of you thought you’d be in this situation right now.

“I’m not. We’re just going as friends,” you said as the two of you began to paint your faces. “Well make sure he knows that.” You put down the lip liner you were examining, eyes flashing to Claire as she shot you a goofy smile.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You watched as Claire rolled her eyes at your obliviousness, you threw a makeup brush at her that she easily swatted away. “I’m just saying” the other girl’s hands raised in defense, “Hayden has like the biggest crush on you, he’s just too nonchalant to say anything.”

“Really?” The surprise in your voice stole a laugh from Claire. “Of course! Look, you didn’t hear this from me but he had plans to ask you to prom. You just beat him to the punch.”

You watched Claire for a minute as she resumed doing her makeup. Your own eyes find your figure in the mirror, a shy smile curving your lips. Maybe your head had been so far up Carmy’s ass you were too blind to see that there was another great guy out there ready to make you happy.

You thought of the advice Tina had given you a few weeks back, you would always care for Carmy. But if he was getting his happy ending tonight, it was only fair that you tried as well. As you and Claire sat there chit-chatting and getting ready, you thought about how different your life would be if you set your feelings for Carmy aside, and tonight was the best time to figure it out.

You and Claire made your way across the street to the Berzatto household where everyone was waiting for the two of you. Your mom and aunt left 30 minutes ago, Donna having invited them over for dinner while you all attended prom. You saw Hayden’s car parked in front of their house and couldn’t help but feel excited at the idea of spending such a fun night with him, you had only ever seen him as a friend but maybe tonight could change things.

You were pretty sure Donna was snooping through the windows excitedly waiting for the two of you to arrive because the moment your foot hit the sidewalk Donna threw the door open with a loud voice surprising the two of you.

“Oh my goodness! Look at you girls, you look beautiful!” Donna exclaimed as she made her way towards the two of you pulling Claire into a hug before throwing her arms around you, careful to mind the bulky Polaroid camera in her hand.

Removing yourself from the hug you peered behind her to see everyone else filing out of the house. Your aunt helped your mom as she talked Nat’s ear off about something you couldn’t hear. Mikey and Richie do their best to interrogate a calm Hayden, and Carmy awkwardly follows behind at the back of the pack, his suit hugging him well.

You were quickly pulled away from your assessment of Carmy as Nat made her way to you with a huge grin on her face. “Baby! Oh my goodness!” Her words became muffled as she pulled you into a hug. “You look so gorgeous, Carmy is such a tool. Well, no offense to Claire.” You let out a small laugh as you parted from Natalie, the two of you joining everyone else so the picture-taking could begin.

Before joining Claire and Carmy you stopped by Mikey and Richie to pick up your date, hoping they hadn’t gone overboard with the ‘intimidating older brother’ act. Squeezing in between the two older men you looped your arm around their torso pulling them into a double-side hug.

“Are tweedle-dee and tweedle-dumb giving you a hard time Hayden?” The words leave behind a mock pout on your lips. You gave Hayden a bright smile, easily taking his suited figure in, he had forgone his round dorky glasses. But his signature unruly dark curls were in their usual mess atop of his head, and you would admit you appreciated it.

You watched as the once apprehensive look on his face turned into a bright grin at your words, a pretty blush painting his angular cheeks. “Wow, you look uh-”

“She looks what buddy?” Mikey’s tone left no room for questions, his arms moving to cross against his chest widening his stance to appear more intimidating.

“You look pretty.” You weren’t even given a second to respond as Mikey started in again.

“I look fucking pretty to you? Richie, this boy just call me pretty?” Mikey’s eyes never left Hayden’s even as his question was directed at Richie.

You watched as Richie copied Mikey’s stance, your arms falling from their movements. “Yeah Mikey, I think he fucking did.”

“Richie’s a looker too, you gonna call him pretty?” You watched as Hayden fumbled with his words, eyes searching yours for any help.

“Yeah Curly Sue, I wanna be fucking pretty too.” You weren’t sure how the conversation had gotten so out of control but luckily for you, your mom was there to save the day. Pulling Hayden’s attention to a conversation so he could escape your two personal bodyguards.

“You two stop giving that poor boy a hard time.” Mikey and Richie having no defense against your mom, let him join her as Donna came up to the three of you for a picture.

You resumed your initial position with them, arms finding their way back around their torsos. The two of them leaned down to press a kiss against both of your cheeks, a cheesy smile taking over your features as the three of you posed for Donna’s camera.

“Okay Baby, grab your cute little date and take some photos,” Donna motioned you over to where Nat was finishing up the couple photos of Carmy and Claire, now waiting for you and Hayden.

You maneuvered yourself from Mikey and Richie’s grip standing in front of them, the two of them looking at you with smirks decorating their faces. Although you found their antics to be stupid, you were glad to have people in your life who cared enough about you to try and scare your dates away.

“This kid not weird or some shit is he Baby?” Mikey scowled at you, arms finding their way across his chest. You shook your head, you thought you knew enough about Hayden to vouch for him. “No, he’s just a friend. It was a last-minute decision.” The two men stared at the boy who was waiting for you to take pictures with him, the pretty flower corsage in a box in his hands.

Mikey nodded in his direction signaling for you to go and join him, “You guys stop by The Beef after. Don’t want you and Carmy getting into any stupid shit.” You nodded before making your way to Hayden’s side. His smile caused one to grace your lips as well.

“Everybody wants pictures of us but uh, I need to give you this first.” You smiled as he shyly showed you the corsage, you watched as he removed it from its box. You held out your hand as he carefully slipped it on your wrist, surprised to see how perfectly the colors chosen complimented your skin tone.

You couldn’t help but share a small smile with him when the two of you caught each other’s eyes again. “Thank you, Hayden, it's beautiful.” The click of a camera drew your attention, eyes finding Nat’s as she looked at the image on her digital camera.

“Awe Baby! The two of you are so cute, okay give me a few poses.” Carmy couldn’t help but watch as Sugar gushed over you and Hayden, his mom keeping Claire’s attention as they discussed whatever it was they were so enraptured in.

He watched as the two of you took photos as if you were a couple and not just two friends going to prom. The two of you stood in the standard prom pose looking like the perfect match, Hayden standing behind you with his hands wrapped around your waist, the two of you smiling happily at the camera. The position changed slightly as Hayden rested his chin on your shoulder for one shot, slightly turning his head for the next shot so his lips caressed your cheek. From Carmy’s vantage point, you didn’t seem to mind.

Carmy was pulled into Mikey’s side as his older brother wrapped his arm around his shoulder. The two of them watch you and your date in silence for a moment. “Baby’s growing up isn’t she?” The question was not something Carmy was expecting from Mikey.

“Do me a favor and look out for her Carmy alright?” Carmy nodded, no one ever needed to ask that of him. “Better start treating her right before this becomes your feature.” Mikey looked down at Carmy hoping to drill the words into his younger brother, sending one more squeeze to his shoulder and an encouraging smile his way before leaving to join Richie in conversation with your mom and aunt.

Sugar caught Carmy’s eye, a melancholy smile on her lips, “Carmy come, let me get a picture of you and Baby together!” He looked to his mom and Claire, the two of them giving him nods of encouragement. He gently took the Polaroid camera from his mom's hand knowing you’d like at least one Polaroid of the two of you before heading in your direction.

He approached you and Hayden as the two of you were having a quiet conversation, “So if I potentially called you baby non platonically how would you feel about that?” Carmy wanted to gag and was relieved as he watched you roll your eyes at the cheesy pickup line.

“Eww, actually please don’t,” Carmy stood there in silence watching how chummy the two of you were and feeling awkward for just listening.

“You’re right, my girl has a better ring to it.” Carmy’s eyes widened he had no idea where the fuck this kid's confidence was coming from but it sure was starting to piss him off. He watched your mouth hang open partially at a loss for words apparently just as appalled as Carmy.

The hand reaching up to cup your chin almost sent Carmy into a full spiral, “Close your mouth, can’t have my girl swallowing flies.” Camry was about to blow his shit! Who the fuck did this model-looking motherfucker think he was?

“Hey, pretty boy! None of that slick shit in my yard!” Carmy had never been more thankful for Mikey’s obnoxious personality, watching as you and Hayden laughed together looking thick as thieves.

He quickly took his opportunity to squeeze his way into the space Hayden had once taken up. Carmy could feel the tension as he stood next to you, he quickly handed the Polaroid off to Sugar so she could take the picture before making his way back to your side.

Neither of you spoke a word as you got into position standing in a side hug so the awkward tension between the two of you wouldn’t be as noticeable in the final photo. As you fixed yourself to make sure you were presentable, Carmy found himself enraptured with you carefully sliding his arm around your waist.

The way you had chosen to style your hair was something he wasn’t accustomed to. The new style allows the angelic planes of your face to be showcased, the apples of your cheeks and your cheekbones catching his eye. The pretty sparkly stuff on your eyelids catching the dimming sunlight he was almost tempted to touch it. He liked the earrings you had chosen and the way the pearls sat so prettily around your neck he wanted to trace each one.

The square neckline of your dress showcased your perfectly sculpted collarbones. Carmy was so lost in his study of you he hadn’t thought twice about running his thumb across the one closest to him. The touch tickled you enough that your body was now slightly turned into his. Carmy cleared his throat, “Uh…um there was a bug.” He watched as you nodded along with his lame excuse.

Your hand came up to smooth out his pocket square that sat atop his heart. Carmy caught your eye before you could face the camera head-on, he gave your waist a slight squeeze to give himself a boost of confidence. Carmy watched as you stared up at him questionably the two of you just staring at each other for a moment.

Carmy’s eyes darted over your face, taking in your features before losing himself to the shape of your lips for a moment. “I think you look beautiful tonight Baby.” The words left Carmy’s lips with no sense of apprehension, no shyness. He was sure of himself; sure of his statement.

You had leaned into him a little bit more, your eyes rapidly blinking as your brain realized what he said. Carmy watched as a small shy smile graced your lips, his own soon following as he realized just how important it was to keep that pretty smile in his life.

Unbeknownst to the two of you Sugar had watched the whole moment play out, quickly raising the Polaroid to capture the intimate moment between the two of you. A moment she was hoping would finally lead to more between the two of you.

“Thank you Carmy,” Carmy watched as you leaned in slightly before stopping yourself and quickly readjusting so you were facing Sugar head-on. Carmy wasn’t sure what had changed between the two of you in these last couple of weeks but as Carmy forced himself to look away from you, he found himself thankful for whatever ushered in that change.

Carmen Berzatto knew at that moment, he would want for no one else the way he did you. And he would spend every day for the rest of his life proving that he was enough for you.

You and Hayden were leaning against his car as the two of you watched Carmy walk Claire down the street to her own house. Hayden had volunteered to drive you all to prom, and when your fun was done there happily drove you all to The Beef, excited to try the sandwiches you couldn’t stop raving about.

And now the night had come to an end, the four of you all ending back up at your starting destination. You thought the media embellished high school prom a bit, but you hadn’t regretted your decision to go and were happy to have spent such a memorable night with people whose company you enjoyed.

Hayden’s arm was brushing against yours, his suit jacket almost swallowing you up. You were grateful for the jacket, the night growing colder as time went on. The two of you were calmly standing in each other’s presence, the silence not bothering either of you. Tonight with Hayden was fun, you enjoyed how goofy he was. Always doing what he could to make you smile and laugh, you were scared things might have been awkward due to the romantic undertone of the event.

“I had a really good time tonight Hayden, thank you for being my date.” You couldn’t help the shy smile on your lips, you were sure your cheeks would be sore from smiling the whole night away.

Hayden sent you a bright smile of his own head nodding along, “Me too, I’m glad you decided to ask me.” The two of you stood there for a moment just smiling at each other.

In the movies, this was usually the moment a kiss would happen. But you weren’t sure if you wanted Hayden to kiss you, you enjoyed his company and you thought he was a great guy but you didn’t feel anything romantic for him yet and didn’t want a single kiss to lead him on.

You leaned up slightly, your lips caressing his cheek as a form of thanks. “Maybe…we could hang out some other time?” If you were really going to put your happiness first it would be necessary to put yourself out there.

“I’ve got you till the end of July don’t I?” Your eyes find Hayden’s cheeky smile as his hand raised your chin. You nodded eyes searching his face, wondering what these next two months might hold for the two of you.

His thumb began to rub back and forth on your chin, your breath hitching as you watched him lean down. Mind going blank, panic filling you as you tried to figure out if this was something you wanted. You stood still, nerves racing through your body as you were about to have your first kiss.

You watched as Hayden’s eyes flicked to the side before he reluctantly stepped back, thumb brushing your chin one final time before his hand returned to its side. You followed his line of sight to see Carmy approaching, standing a little distance away to wait for you.

Turning back to Hayden you sent him one last smile, the boy pulled you into a hug engulfing you with a slight kiss pressed to the top of your head before the two of you moved apart. You quickly slipped off his jacket before handing it to him, moving back so he could get in his car. You watched as he sent Carmy a small nod in goodbye before his car disappeared down your street.

Letting out a small sigh you turned to where Carmy was waiting for you a shy smile on his face. You smiled back as you approached him the two of you walking up the sidewalk to his front door, you knew your mom and aunt would still be here at this time.

The two of you entered the house greeting the four women that were sitting in the living room having their small party. Questions were thrown at both of you about your time and making sure your dates made it home safe all the usual questions to be expected after prom. You listened as your mom told you that you would be leaving soon. Knowing that when it came to your mom soon could mean in the next five minutes or the next two hours.

Your eyes found Carmy’s as you let out a small yawn, his eyebrows raising in question before nodding towards his room. You made your way to follow him up the stairs too tired to contribute to the conversation happening in the living room.

Entering Carmy’s room you made your way to the foot of his bed to sit down, quickly removing your heels a sense of relief filling you. Dropping your heels you watched as Carmy stood by his door looking as though his mind was racing. You smiled at him patting the spot next to you, a sort of peace offering.

“How was your night, Carmy?” You watched as he made his way to sit next to you, head falling to rest on his shoulder as you awaited his response.

“It was fun, yeah, Claire was really nice.” You watched as he blushed, you might have felt a little sad any other night but right now you were too exhausted to care.

“Why didn’t you kiss Hayden?” The question hit you like a shot of espresso. You raised your head from Carmy’s shoulder trying to find his eyes as he kept his head focused on his clasped hands. “I don’t know, I don’t think it felt right.” You genuinely had no good explanation for Carmy, you didn’t even have one for yourself.

“Did you kiss Claire?” Your question came off a little more hostile than you had intended. Carmy sat up, eyes finally meeting yours as he shook his head. You felt guilty at the relief that flooded through you.

“No, it didn't feel right.” You let out a small laugh at the recycled explanation, a similar one leaving Carmy’s lips as he didn’t take his eyes off of you.

“Gosh we’re such losers,” you giggled, bumping your shoulder with Carmy’s. “I thought for sure you would’ve taken your chance to kiss Claire tonight.” You wiggled your eyebrows in a teasing manner, the ice that had been ruining your friendship this past week seemingly forgotten.

Carmy gulped as he continued to study you. “Maybe she wasn’t the girl I wanted to kiss tonight,” Carmy’s words caused your joking mood to quickly sober up, the smile disappearing from your face completely as you realized just how intently he was staring at you.

“Carmy,” your voice trailed off, not sure what the boy in front of you was getting at. You stood up needing a bit of space to understand the underlying message in Carmy’s words. “Carmy, what are you talking about?”

He followed your movements, the two of you both standing up now, faces inches apart. You couldn’t help but follow Carmy’s tongue as it quickly traced his lips, your own coming out to wet yours. The room was silent as you waited for Carmy to say something, anything. Your heart began to beat faster as the 10 words Carmy spouted in your direction gave you a sense of hope.

Your breath hitched as you watched Carmy’s hand raise, his eyes falling to your neck. You felt his fingers delicately trace the path of borrowed pearls, each touch leaving behind a whisper of something you couldn’t place. You allowed him to continue, too nervous to say anything at that moment.

His hand began to trace its way up the side of your neck, soft touch making your knees weak. He looked to be in a trance lost in the idea of you. A gasp escaped your lips as his hand gripped the side of your neck, fingers gently tugging the hair at the nape of your neck.

Carmy couldn’t explain it, but this, you standing so beautifully in his room right now, lips parted slightly as you waited for him to make the final move felt right. It felt so right it didn’t matter who either of you went to prom with, it didn’t matter that this would be the first kiss for both of you. What mattered was that it was you here with him; you who had always been with him, he would’ve given everything to be deserving of you.

The small nod of your head was the last sign Carmy needed before he surged forward capturing your lips in a harsh kiss. The two of you were so inexperienced your teeth clashed together. The roughness brought the both of you back down to earth, you couldn’t help but laugh at how awkward that first kiss was. You didn’t even think it could even be considered a kiss, more so a smack of lips against each other.

You watched the shy blush rise on Carmy’s cheeks, you could tell he was feeling self-conscious about the whole situation. Your hand raised to gently caress the hand that was still placed on the side of your neck.

Eyes locked you sent him a warm smile leaning in slightly a small whispered “c’mere” breathed between the two of you as you gently pressed your lips into his. Your eyes closed as you felt Carmy relax into the embrace, a sigh leaving his lips as he tugged you closer by the hand wrapped around your neck.

The two of you pulled apart eyes fluttering open as you drank in each other. Neither of you say anything for a moment, the room is filled with the sounds of your soft breathing. You couldn’t believe this was finally happening, all these months of unrequited feelings and secret pining, and here you were kissing Carmen Berzatto in his bedroom.

You watched as Carmy let out a shy laugh, thumb caressing the space behind your ear. Your smile matched his, the two of you watching the other with goofy smiles playing on your lips.

“Can I-,”

“Yes.”

Carmy gave you no chance to finish your sentence before he eagerly agreed and surged back in to kiss you. His lips felt like heaven against your own, you had wondered what this moment would feel like if it ever happened. If Carmy’s lips felt as soft as they looked, what would their natural taste be like?

The kiss continued as Carmy’s tongue poked out to shyly glide across your lips, you smiled into the kiss before parting your own. Easily inviting him in, the two of you languidly moved in sync, no battle to be fought as the two of you enjoyed the caress of each other’s mouths.

You couldn’t help but moan into Carmen’s mouth a hunger you didn’t know you had finally being satisfied. The small tug on your hair caused your mouth to open wider, the kiss becoming sloppy as the two of you gave in to your desires. You felt Carmy’s hand delicately trace your neck, his infatuation constantly leading him back to it.

The bite on your lip caused a harsh gasp to leave your lips, Carmy quickly pulling away at the noise. He looked at you with wide fearful eyes scared that he hurt you, ruining a good moment too soon.

“I - I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to.” Seeing Carmy so worried and vulnerable at the moment sent a thrill of warmth through your body. Your confidence grew as his faded, you took a small step into his space backing him up into the foot of the bed which caused him to resume his sitting position.

You could get used to looking down at Carmy.

You raised the hem of your dress so you could maneuver yourself into his lap, arms going to wrap around his neck. Carmy watched you like a deer in headlights, this new sense of confidence making you feel brave. As Carmy sat there like a statue you gently removed your hands from around his neck to guide his to your waist.

His hands squeezed your hips as you quickly adjusted yourself in his lap, Carmy’s eyes following the hem of your dress as it moved up more exposing your thighs. “Won’t you kiss me again Carmy?” The small whisper bounced off of Carmy’s lips due to your proximity, you watched as he rapidly nodded his head, hands squeezing your hips for dear life. You gave him a small smile before the both of you surged forward eager to be connected again.

As the kiss between you deepened you began unconsciously rolling your hips into Carmy’s the feel of his lips searing into yours making you want more. You listened as a strangled noise left Carmy’s lips before he pulled away again, you quickly stopped your ministrations.

“Is this okay, do you want me to stop?” The question caused Carmy’s head to rest against your rapidly rising and falling chest.

“No-no I-I just need a minute.” You were beginning to feel guilty, maybe you had come on too strong and Carmy was just confused about his feelings. You began moving to get off of his lap not wanting him to be any more uncomfortable than he probably was.

You stopped as a blissful sigh escaped Carmy’s lips, his eyes finally moving to meet yours. You sat there silently as the grip on your hips tightened a sigh parting your lips as Carmy bucked up into you while he guided you back and forth. The direct eye contact somehow increased the sensation between the two of you.

“I-I like it when you move like that.” You nodded along to Carmy’s words, continuing the movements yourself as Carmy’s lips found your neck trailing open-mouth kisses on any bare piece of skin he could. One hand quickly reached up, sliding the thin strap of your dress down, so he could finally appreciate your collarbones in the way they deserved.

In all honesty, neither of you had any clue what the hell you were doing, but whatever it was, it was working. No matter how messy the touches were, or how sloppily you were kissing each other every movement felt right.

Carmy was lavishing your chest and neck in any way that he could, kisses trailing over each collarbone. An impromptu bite in the space where your neck and shoulder met caused your breath to hitch. Your hips created a rhythm against his as the two of you lost yourself to the bliss.

A loud knock at the door interrupted the two of you. Carmy quickly removed his lips from your neck, doing his best to shield your body in case someone walked in. Neither of you knew how long it had been, too caught up in losing yourself to each other, too caught up to realize how far things had almost gone.

The knock sounded again as your aunt said your name, “We’re heading out, meet us downstairs.” Footsteps leading away from the door calmed the nerves both you and Carmy had been feeling, eyes peeling away from the door to match with each other.

No one said a word as the two of you stared at each other, you taking in Carmy’s flushed appearance. As he admired your disheveled figure above him, the confidence quickly left your body as you shuffled to get off of his lap.

The hand on your hip stopped you as you eyed him curiously, he slowly reached up to fix the straps that he had slid off of your shoulders, the slow shy touches caused your head to spin. He helped you stand up before adjusting the hem of your dress. You quickly glanced away as he tried to subtly adjust himself.

The shout of your name from downstairs forced you to rush to his bathroom mirror to fix any obvious differences in your appearance. By the time you came back, Carmy was holding one of his knit crew necks out for you to slip on.

His hand reached up to scratch the back of his neck, “Uhh, it's cold outside.” You smiled gratefully before slipping the crew neck on, quickly scooping up your heels as you made your way to the door. You turned around facing Carmy one last time with a wide smile on your face, you leaned in prepared to end the night with a sweet kiss.

Carmy leaned in pressing a sweet kiss to your forehead, the two of you scoring the intimate moment. Carmy couldn’t help but smile as he watched you leave wearing his knit crew neck, part of him hoping it smelled of your scent upon its return.

Carmy hadn’t expected the night to take the turn it did, but he was thanking his lucky stars that you went along, no questions asked. Neither of you knew what this meant for the future of your friendship, or if this would blossom into something more. But the two of you were both lost in the bliss of your actions to think too long on it for the rest of the night.

Sunday Evening

You hadn’t seen much of Carmy over the rest of the weekend, instead spending the free time with your mom and aunt. You also weren’t quite sure how to approach him, and the fact that he hadn’t approached you either signified you were both at a standstill, neither of you sure how to broach the topic.

It was Sunday evening and you were on your way to The Beef picking up an extra shift after Mikey called to ask if you could come in. Richie had to leave early for whatever the hell he did in his spare time.

As you parked in the back lot, you were surprised to see Carmy sneaking through the back door. Your heart began to thud a little faster, it was stupid, but you hadn’t thought you’d be seeing him so soon. You sat there for a moment calming your nerves, you were sure the conversation wouldn’t be brought up while you were working, but maybe Carmy came here looking for you specifically.

You got out of your car, locking it behind you before entering the establishment. Quickly punching your time card before grabbing one of the spare aprons and heading to check in with Mikey.

The dinner rush would be starting soon and since Richie was gone you’d have to balance working the cashier and running food to the diners. You walked around, head popping into the office to let Mikey know you were there.

The two of you crashed into each other as he was making his way to the kitchen, arms shooting out to steady you so you didn’t fall.

“Thanks for coming Baby, but uh if you wanna go home I won’t stop you.” You watched Mikey awkwardly scratch the back of his head, eyes darting around the kitchen as he watched the controlled chaos ensue. Surprise etching your features, not used to Mikey being the awkward Berzatto in your life.

“No, I don’t mind kind of needed to get out of the house anyways,” you smiled at home before heading to the front to take care of the line that was beginning to form.

Most of the orders were for takeout so you hadn’t been rushing back and forth too much. But the Johnsons, an old couple who ate dinner here every Sunday, was your first dine-in order, the two greeting you before heading back to their favorite table.

You turned to the window waiting for the order you had already given, watching as Tina made her way to you apprehensively.

“I can run this for you Mama if you want me to.” You shook your head sending her a smile before taking the two red baskets from her hand and making your way to the dining area, eyes instantly spotting the older couple.

“Two famous Italian beef sandwiches for my favorite regulars,” you smiled down at the couple setting a tray in front of each one respectively.

“Say, honey, isn’t that your little friend over there?” You watched as the woman subtly pointed at another table, you and her partner both taking in the scene in front of you.

You felt a wide smile spreading over your face as you took in Carmy’s figure, the shyness exuding off of him. His lips brandishing a small smile, it took the laughter of his table mate to slap the rose-colored glasses off your face.

So caught up in your infatuation with the boy you’d been crushing on and finally got to kiss the other night, you hardly noticed Claire.

The two women sitting at the table in front of you sharing a knowing look, guilt seeping through as they alerted you to something you’d rather be ignorant to.

“I’m so sorry honey, I didn’t mean to upset you. Mabel been telling me I oughta learn when to shut my big mouth. If I ain’t listen 20 years ago I sure wasn’t gone figure it out by now.” You let out a sad pathetic laugh at Ms. Sadie’s explanation doing your best to compartmentalize your feelings.

“Shame though Baby, that boys missing out on something good. You looked at that boy like he parted the heavens and earth. My Mabel used to look at me like that, you know, the only thing she looks at like that now is cake and these damn beef sandwiches.” Ms. Sadie’s laugh unconsciously draws one of your own, finally taking your attention from Carmy and Claire.

“Oh hush up now Sadie and let the girl get back to work,” another watery laugh escaped your lips. “Talking this sweet girl's ear off like she wants to listen to you on top of watching the boy she loves on a date.”

Your head shot to Ms. Mabel’s slightly taken aback by her word choice, she settled you with a look. “Don’t go giving me that look now. You may be foolin' that boy and yourself but you ain’t foolin' anyone with eyes baby.” You let her reach out to gently pat your hand, the two women in front of you made it hard to keep your calm facade up.

“You gone on and head home Baby, and if Michael has a problem with it you let him know Ms. Mabel and Ms. Sadie said it was okay.” You let out a real laugh, the sound caught the one boy’s attention you didn’t care for right now.

“And tell your momma to stop by if she’s ever feeling up for it,” you sent the couple a small smile nodding your head. “Yes ma’am, you two enjoy the rest of your night.” With that, you began your journey out of the dining room.

You stopped as you heard Claire call out your name, turning inside the doorway as she sent you a wave, returning a small one as you purposefully avoided giving Carmy any attention.

You made your way into the kitchen no one needed to ask what was wrong as they took in your somber mood. You silently slid into the walk-in, maybe it was unsanitary but you didn’t think you could face anyone as you finally let the first sob wrack your body.

The fact that you knew this incident wouldn’t change your friendship with him irritated you to no end. But you cared for him so much that you just couldn’t force yourself to quit him. Maybe this move was what you needed, the time spent apart would allow you to discover who you were outside of Carmen Berzatto. You would do your best to allow the friendship between the two of you to keep flourishing, but whatever Carmy decided was best for him, you’d just have to live with it.

You hadn’t realized how long you were standing in the walk-in until Mikey entered. Body engulfing yours in a hug as his warmth radiated through you. The older Berzatto allowed you to stain his shirt in tears, neither of you saying a word as the sound of your sorrow painted the walk-in.

The youngest Berzatto’s hand stilled on the door handle as he listened to your faint cries. His own heart broke as he realized that he hurt you again. Head hitting against the exterior of the door, he didn’t deserve you, didn’t know if he ever would. Carmy forced himself to listen to your faint sobs wanting to console you at this moment but not knowing where the two of you stood.

Two friends stood on opposite sides of a steel door, hearts breaking in unison as it felt like everything was fighting against what they both wanted. July would come and they would part ways, promises whispered to stay in contact and remain friends, neither soul knowing what the years apart would have in store for them.

a/n: i apologize if anything in this chapter doesn't make sense or is wonky, i've been editing for 3 days straight and i feel like i can't read english anymore. hope you enjoyed! i also have a whole playlist if anyone is interested!

taglist: @hawkins-2000 @elliesbabygirl @allbark-no-bite @anakinswh0re3005 @rexorangecouny @thecraziestcrayon @fruitcupsworld @nishinoyahhh @lilylovelyxo @ridingthehotmessexpress @noas-ark @jadeittic @hellokittyever @luvr-bunnyy @sxgees @fandomhopped @is-this-a-febreze-commercial @kravitzwhore @chanluuvr @readingwiththereids @chims-kookies @ladygrey03 @ferida-kahlo @wanderlustnightwanderer @how2besalty @armydrcamers @jointherebellion215 @jackierose902109 @blkbxrbie-esther @ajordan2020 @head-slut-in-charge @magnet-girl @thebookwormlife @sevikasblackgf @writers-hes @senassn

unable to tag: @khena @kailyn-g05 @ovaqma @fire-treasure-iii @frequentnosebleeder @gcidrvsh @awatt31 @cauliflowerpatch

[ivydarkrose]

lol Posted some of these on insta but made more today.

Nathan the Nobody - I do like this one more than the one made before. Its only missing stubble on his face.

Crystal- Of course this time I got around to make his twin. They may be fraternal twins, but I like them looking more similar.

Bleeding Angel- She's my proxy for slenderman. I do need to fix up her info as is been years since i've touched it. Been getting back into slenderverse (I blame cat hunters creator for that xP )

Trinette- My Proxy for Puppeteer, she needs her ref refreshed no doubts there.

Raine- My Doll character. WHO TERRABLLY NEEDS AN UPDATE 😭😭😭 I made her AU for Umbra but this version aka creepypasta one needs her ref updated. I wish to make her more terror filled with her look, but then again might go against her story's purpose.

Morivin -The yellow brother of Candy Pop and Drol lol. (damn does he need a story 😭) I tried with him, kept his facepaint to a min.

Melissa the heartless- Fun fact, first Creepypasta before I knew I had dyslexia. WOO was that a honestly horrible experience to go through. But hey, lead me to improving my write bit by bit. Can proudly say I'm a notice writer now UvU 😂

Sin the Siren slender- aka the MFer I can't figure out what to do with! Or name even. (also Sin is just short for singerman. he use to be a menace to Nathan a LOT 😂) His artbreeder thing looks AWEFUL I tried to fix it up though

Dr Blair- He was hard, the glasses refused to stay, PLUS he's my oldest creepypasta human. so I wanted to make him look his age but damned artbreeder made that harder. Also (He's former creeps title was "Dennis the Dentist" but on advice from @sanityisforlosers told me the name needs updated and I agree. LMAO)

So yea made all these the last few days. Also showed me how many of my older creepypasta/slenderverse characters need a HUGE update. 😭

[papermonkeyism]

Duo (& ambitious lol) ask time!

1. Do you have a masterlist of species, and/or character ref sheets or docs with all your facts?

(if not I suggest a "Canon" and "Possibly Canon" area for all the cool trains of thought fweheheh)

2. Would you be open to people making some OCs/possible tribes and sharing online, with credit ofc, of some Bird Tribe members?

Okay have a nice day! Please do not worry if the answer to both is 'no' ^u^

1: I am very seriously scatterbrained person who can jump between entirely different headworlds within minutes and has huge big trouble concentrating on tasks that aren't immediately rewarding (I'm 98% sure I have pretty bad case of ADHD, but my first evaluating visit to doctor won't be untill 15th october, so the jury is still out on that). I also do all of my onlining on my phone these days, and the screen is very small.

Which is a really long way of saying no, I don't think I have the means to do masterlists.

I make blog posts to quickly note down my thoughts for myself to find later, when sketchbook isn't at hand. I'm afraid it hasn't been a priority to make them purposefully available for other people beyond just existing.

I am pretty okay with tagging my tumblr musings, though, so if you want to find things of a particular headworld, just pick a tag, click on it and dive.

I do have character ref sheets in there, somewhere, although I should get around to updating them. Some are kinda outdated.

Alternatively, the dinosaur headworld specifically is based on Two Medicine formation, which existed in north-ish Laramidia (nowdays' Montana) in Campanian period in late Cretaceous. My species are mostly from there, while some small borrows from nearby Judith River and Dinosaur Park formations might make cameos. Those can be just googled. Wikipedia is surprisingly good with that!

2: Depends what for.

If it's just for fun and your own amusement, sure! Go ahead, have fun. Give credit and link to me and we're good.

Just please, do not make money off of my work and designs.

Also be aware that I potentially cannot enjoy your fan creations myself. I don't want to get sued or harrassed if I eventually use ideas that might have originally come from you, so I might stay away just to make sure I don't accidentally steal ideas. Depends.

I want to reserve myself the possibility of one day making money with my dinosaur project thingy. Maybe not much, I've gone the self publishing route before, but still some money would be nice. I've spent too many years of my life working on this to not to.

If you want to make your own dinosaurs unrelated to mine, YES! That would be awesome! The world needs more dinosaurs. I'm always up to more dinosaurs!

Uh, does that cover everything? I'm a chronic rambler, sorry about that.

[izzy-b-hands]

Eventuality Eventually

My first bit of Smile fic! Roger has bought a new van for himself/for the band! And it is...something. But of course, this is less about the van and more about the three goof balls that plan to ride around in it. Set in a loose-ish AU? If only because I’m doing real general research rn, so I might fumble things about the timeline as I go, if I write more after this one (which I would like to do!) Some Brian/Roger here as well, which I didn’t actually intend, but then I got going and suddenly here it is lol. 

A quick note too that Freddie is mentioned in this, but only in that this part of the timeline he was friends with them, and at this point was still using his old last name of Bulsara; just noting it so seeing that name isn’t a surprise!

My love to all who read/like/reblog!

“But does it run?” 

Roger looked horribly offended, his arms falling from their stretched out motion of presentation. “Of course it fucking runs! Wouldn’t have bought it, if it didn’t.” 

“I know,” Tim said. “It’s just that you like projects-” 

Roger shot him a dangerous look.

“And that’s a good thing! It shows preservation, and a willingness to put in hard work,” Tim continued. “We don’t want to be stranded again, is the thing.” 

“Was embarrassing, having your mum come pick us up,” Brian added. “She was so upset...” 

“It was awfully late,” Tim noted. “Can’t blame her; we did wake her up.” 

Roger frowned. “So you hate this van, is what you’re saying?” 

“We didn’t say that,” Brian said, but he didn’t unfold his arms or take a step closer towards the simultaneously rusting and rust-colored vehicle. 

“Safety comes to mind,” Tim said, trying to be diplomatic. “But I’m sure it’s better on the inside, isn’t it?” 

Roger smiled at that, and yanked open the side door of the van. It let out a shrill shriek of metal on metal, but Tim motioned for Brian to not say a word about it. 

“See?” Roger crouched inside and dropped into the passenger seat, pointing for them to take the two rows of seats behind the passenger and driver section. “Much better on the inside. You could sleep comfortably in this, if you wanted!” 

“There is a spring that nearly went up my ass,” Brian hissed to Tim, leaning awkwardly forward on his seat. 

“Nice material,” Tim said, running a hand over the worn and cracked leather. “Vintage!” 

Roger’s eyes were starry with happiness. “Exactly! That’s what I thought when I saw it. And good condition, considering the price.” 

“How much did you pay for this?” Brian asked. 

“It was a steal,” Roger replied with a grin as he leaned back in his seat, tossing his feet up on the dashboard, watching them with the cracked rearview mirror. 

“That’s not a number,” Brian said. “How much, in an amount with numbers, did you pay for this?” 

Roger looked wounded again, and internally, Tim sighed. They could go from being the best of friends to stabbing at each other in a heartbeat, these two. It made him think of fencers: neither stabbed to kill, but occasionally they landed a hit that bruised and then looked to him as some sort of ref, as if he should have somehow ripped the saber from the other’s hand before the blow could land. 

“I don’t know if it matters much, if Roger isn’t asking for us to give him any towards it,” Tim said. “Are you, Rog?” 

Roger shook his head. “Just toss me money for upkeep and fuel every now and again, or buy me dinner.” 

“Like your girlfriends then,” Brian snorted, and Tim reached an arm back to slap at his leg. 

“Yeah, but you don’t get what they get out of it,” Roger said as he stuck his tongue out at the mirror, his reflection sending it to Brian in the backseat. 

“A warm sweaty number of nights in the back of a rusty van?” Brian mused sarcastically. “Isn’t that basically what we have every time we drive back from a show?” 

“Those are notably less...” Roger paused. “Well. They’re fun, but not the type of fun-” 

“I think we get the picture,” Tim interrupted quickly.

“Oh, but I could paint a better one,” Roger grinned mischievously. “C’mon Tim. Let me use my brush and make that one blush.” 

But Brian was already blushing, and looking more frustrated by the minute. 

If he didn’t do something, the sabers would be tossed away, and they’d be fighting with fists, at least metaphorically. 

“Why don’t we finish the tour of the van, and then go for lunch?” Tim offered. “My treat?” 

It was a blessing that, as low on money as they could be on occasion, they were often food-motivated creatures. Tim included himself in that, and the promise of food, even if he had to buy it for himself, was what kept him going now. 

“Not much more to see,” Roger sighed, clearly still nursing some hurt. “There’s enough space back there for our gear, behind the coat rack they’ve apparently included on the second row of seats-” 

“Hey!” Brian shouted. “You ought to talk, you...” 

He fumbled, blushing somehow redder still, and Tim felt for him. It was obvious to him that both Brian and Roger were stumbling around feelings for each other, but neither of them made it easy. Truthfully, he was hoping they’d just finally confess to each other about it, or fuck, or both. 

He did have a bet riding with Freddie Bulsara on the fucking though, and a fiver to win if he was right and they did it within the next six months. 

Brian was still stuck as Tim tumbled out from his thoughts, and he gave him a gentle poke to the knee. 

“Are you going to say something rude to him, or not?” Tim asked. “Just wondering if we can go get lunch now, or if we ought to wait you out.” 

Brian gave him a look, then sighed. “No. I’ll make up for it later. Let’s go.” 

“That’s so sweet of you,” Roger laughed as he moved to the driver’s seat, keys jingling as he forced them out of his tight trouser pocket. “You’ll really give it to me later, huh? Make me cry?” 

Tim nearly blushed himself. Surely, Roger could hear himself, and knew how he sounded...

But then, he almost definitely did know, and that had to be supplying the shit-eating smile Roger was wearing as he glanced at them in the rearview mirror again. 

“I don’t ever want to make you cry,” Brian said, but Tim could not for the life of him tell if he was being sarcastic or genuine or if this was Brian trying to flirt. 

“Yet you did drop that amp on my foot,” Roger said as he started the van, that made an odd belching sound as it woke up. “And then I did cry and swear for two minutes.” 

“That was an accident,” Brian said. “Your foot was fine.” 

“You never did say sorry.” 

“I did so!” Brian protested, and tapped Tim on the shoulder. “You heard me; I did!” 

“You did, but you did say it while blaming him for your dropping your end of it,” Tim said. 

“He did make me drop it!” 

“I did not!” Roger shouted back, eyes half on the road and half glaring at Brian in the rearview mirror. 

Before Tim could beg Roger to keep his gaze more on the road, Roger hit the brakes hard enough to toss him out of his seat as he pulled them to a barely big enough street parking space. 

“Get out of my van!” 

“This is a band vehicle; I don’t have to go anywhere!” Brian’s usually soft voice was harsh now, and he was yelling more in Tim’s ear than anything else as Tim scrabbled off the floor and back onto his seat. 

“I’ll make you get out!” 

“Good, make me!” 

“I will!” 

“I’d like to see you fucking-” 

“Will the two of you kiss, or fuck, or whatever you need to do to make this stop?!” Tim shouted, and they fell silent.

He had planned to say that in his head, and it dawned on him after another beat of silence that he had said it aloud instead. 

They were both blushing, bright red, eyes wide. 

Roger swallowed hard. “That obvious, is it?” 

“You’re both so bad at hiding it,” Tim said weakly. “I mean that kindly, as much as I can.” 

Brian nodded. “Well?” 

“Well what?” Roger asked softly.

“Are you going to make me get out of the van?” 

Roger gave Tim a nervous glance, then slipped out of the driver’s seat and moved past him to Brian. 

He stayed long enough to see the kiss, then slipped out of the van quietly as Brian pulled Roger down with him onto the seat. It was a blessing that the back of the van didn’t have windows except for one at the far back door. 

He pulled the keys from the ignition and pocketed them before he left, his destination the nearest shop that had food that would qualify as lunch and be fairly cheap. 

With one detour, to the nearest phone box. 

“Bulsara? Yeah, just wanted to give you an update. A kiss, and they might be fucking in the back of our new van. If you’d like to come down and have lunch with us, you could give me that fiver right away...” 

[octavoh]

heard you had an Octavo AU and I'm curious: Is he a puppet of Vaati ? Who hurt this poor boy™ and what is this AU about?

OHHH???? YOU’RE APPROACHING ME??????????

I AM VERY GLAD YOU ASKED BECAUSE BOY DO I HAVE A LOT OF CONTENT… 

So the premise of the AU is that Vaati shares a body with Octavo due to some kind of curse. There’s a lot more below, including art for the AU. Please talk to me about it anytime!

I’m copy/pasting this from a doc. My notes are kind of incoherent, as I haven’t solidified the storyline too much (and most of them are just from me rambling on discord). 

Context for the AU:

Vaati dies at the hands of the Hero in the Minish Cap. When he’s defeated, he casts a curse that binds his soul to a vessel. I don’t know what the parameters for the curse are, but it binds Vaati’s soul to Octavo’s.

Octavo knows that Vaati’s sharing a body with him, and Vaati can appear as an apparition to him. And since Octavo is born a few years after the events of MC he knows who Vaati is. That makes Octavo isolate himself, so at the point where shit goes down he lives as a hermit in the middle of the Minish Woods. He is, however, also a traveling musician who hoards instruments in his house.

16 years after Octavo’s birth, Ganondorf invades and takes over Hyrule. Both the king and queen -MC Zelda and Link- die at his hands. (They were barely adults at this point :(  ) However, their daughter, Zelda, escapes with Impa. 

And the plot:

The actual plot takes place 6 years after the fall of Hyrule. It’s anarchy, monsters abroad, Gan seeking the princess, etc. Zelda, now disguised as Sheik, takes refuge in Octavo’s house while being hunted by monsters. I made comic thumbnails about it. Click on the link to see ‘em

So Tavo opens up the door and hes like “bruh wtf” at all the monsters… and gets his ass beat. When Tavo’s knocked out, Vaati takes the chance to blast the monsters away (but doing so takes up most of the power he’s accumulated over Tavo’s lifetime, RIP).

Sheik sees this all happen. They know that Tavo’s gonna have a target on his back due to both his appearance (Since his color palette is kinda sheikah-like. I don’t know. It’s the pale hair) and, he just obliterated like half a platoon of monsters. 

In the meantime, Ganondorf senses Vaati’s magic outburst. He takes it as a sign of the princess’s return, and mobilizes his forces.

Sheik and Tavo end up travelling together. This is a rash decision on Sheik’s part; they know that they could’ve left him behind without endangering him. However, Tavo’s also the only person they’ve really interacted with in three years and both of them are starved for human contact, so they end up clinging to each other.

For a while, they just travel without purpose, helping whatever people they meet on the way. (At this point they also hear about the Link of this AU. I’m still not sure where I’ll implement him and how, though, so I won’t elaborate rn.)

Then they meet [NAME PENDING]. He’s a suspicious old man that Tavo and Sheik just. Keep. Meeting. Eventually, the man confronts the duo. He’s the guide of the story, and tells Sheik about their mission and how they can defeat Ganon. He tells them to find Link.

Congratulations! [NAME PENDING] joined your party! 

… Kind of. He disappears for days at a time. (Eventually, days become weeks. Weeks become months. Months become never again.)

And another major event that happens early on: while Tavo and Sheik are off adventuring, Tavo fucking dies. It’s probably not even a heroic death he just trips on a moblin or something.This activates an aspect of Vaati’s curse. 

So Vaati and Tavo make a pact (a la Ava’s Demon) before their souls really die. I’m still figuring out what exactly they promise each other. 

This is what the pact does, though: 

- Vaati takes somewhat of a “backseat”. However, if it’s necessary, he can take over Tavo’s body for a while. (Doing so puts immense strain on Vaati and he can’t do anything for a while).

- It lets Tavo and Vaati communicate via dreams. 

- Vaati also surrenders his magic power to Tavo (until the pact is … accomplished? Its conditions are met?) but Tavo, being a dumbass… doesn’t find this out till later. 

- It changes Tavo’s appearance… dyes the dude purple. 

- Vaati’s powers magically amplify Octavo’s music, letting him summon monsters and manipulate the elements (to an extent) with it. I might give him the wind waker because it’s the perfect weapon for Tavo (Is baton, has wind powers).

The rest goes something like this:

- Old man disappears altogether. 

- The party finds Link. (Link is a soldier who was chosen by the Triforce of Courage after his predecessor, MC Link, died in battle. He leads somewhat of a one-man rebellion against Ganon.)

- Link also remembers all his past lives (Granted, there aren’t many of them at this point in the timeline.) This includes MC Link. 

- Link is immediately hostile towards Octavo. Their animosity is probably going to be a major arc in the story. (…I’m probably not going to write it. F)

- Sheik and Tavo fight Link at some point when Link attacks Tavo. Eventually they get along and travel together lol

Also I think that the stuff that happens when the party gets to Hyrule Castle deserves its own section so it’s here. My notes also get a lot more incoherent from this point on, so beware

- As Tavo, Sheik, and Link gradually approach Hyrule Castle, they notice something different. The (Hylian + some Gerudo) citizens are happy and healthy. The castle is not in ruins. There are no monsters. It’s eerily idyllic.

- The castle is surrounded by an aura of malice, but everything else is peaceful.

- When they enter the Castle, the staff seem mostly be Gerudo. They welcome the party warmly. (The party is literally just waiting for the sneak attack, but it never comes).

- I don’t know what these are but they’re probably quotes/explanations from people in the castle

- “Six years ago, our king, Ganondorf Dragmire, came to Hyrule. Contrary to what you think, we did come in peace; we were to strike a trade agreement benefitting both our nations. During the last few days of negotiation, Ganondorf fell to a bout of madness- some sort of possession. Nobody had seen anything like it before.”

- “He came back to his senses to discover the blood of a thousand Hylians on his hands.”- [bitterly] “He still disappears to who-knows-where, only communicating with us by notes. We are doing the best we can to make amends for his own actions.”

- [From… Nabooru?] “I grew up with him as a child. He is hiding himself because he thinks- no, he knows- he will hurt others.“ 

And stuff from/about Ganondorf:

- Gan does his best to keep the will of Demise at bay.

- The Thing Happened when he touched some evil artifact in the Hyrule Castle vaults, which enabled Demise to use him and wreck shit up

- Gan has been researching the triforce to better understand what happened to him and learns about the Link/Zelda/Gan cycle thing.

- So the party meets Gan. Link’s in FIGHT mode from the start- Sheik and Tavo recognize Gan’s voice. Oh, wait. That old man…. Huh……..

- They fight and you can see that Gan’s holding back. But before Link can deal the finishing blow Gan goes apeshit because he can’t hold back Demise’s spirit anymore

- Cue epic boss fight but it’s sad because oh man that’s the old dude

- I know i mentioned [NAME PENDING] for like 2 lines but he’s an integral part of the story and becomes a little bit like a father figure to Sheik (and a lesser extent, Tavo). So they’re fighting a close friend. it’s not fun.

- By the end of the battle everyone’s exhausted, triforce pops out and forms that wish-granting triangle thing

- Guess who boops it. Surprise mothafucka, it’s Vaati (having taken over Tavo’s body.)

- He does the evil speech thing and taps the triangle with malicious intent. But there’s been a Vaati redemption arc throughout the story where he learns to empathize with people and become a decent dude. And though his wish sounds evil, but the interpretation is surprisingly neutral/good because his heart’s not really in it, so to speak. i havent even decided to use that particular event or not, though.

I’ve got a doc (It’s kinda inconsistent with what’s here. I need to update it)

And refs! 

Tavo:

Sheik/Zelda:

Link:

Headshots of Octavo, Sheik, and Link respectively:

Yeah! Thanks for reading through all this; I’m really glad you asked!!

[birdie-ghost]

Nah you're good lol!

- Gregory doesn't know that he's a robot, yet.

- Pizza Sim does exist. Mike and Jeremy both got out :) (they both worked as the security guard there.)

- Help wanted Exists. I can't really go that far into what's going on with Vanessa/Vanny though

.

And here are some more infodump posts :P

-The main outline for this AU atm

-the animatronic's roles in the au

-How Jeremike functions/met in this au

-How mike interacts with the animatronics

-Gregory's hight because he's a robot

-a character ref sheet that i really need to update because i made it when i didn't think this would get as popular as it did

-the swearing in the house rules

-Jeremike 5 minute ship pages for my version of the ship lol.

-Why Vanny/William knows about Jeremy but not Gregory

INFO DUMP MORE I LOVE THIS AUUUU

ALRIGHTY!! I HAD AN ANSWER TO THIS LIKE 3 HOURS AGO BUT THEN IT GOT DELETED BEFORE I COULD POST AND IM VERY SAD ABOUT IT.

.

Gregory grows due to a combination of engineering him to randomly have 'growth spurts' where Gregory's endoskeleton 'expands' (this isn't going to be the best explanation but it's like if you roll up a piece of paper really tight and at a shorter angle, its smaller and shorter, but if you let it unroll and have it at a higher angle, it's taller and wider. As well as those like, extendable brooms? have any of you used those? It's a combination of those two mechanisms I guess.) and Mike upgrading Gregory every now and while he sleeps.

Gregory has a soul of his own. He's not a dead kid made into a robot.

.

Jeremy made the in-universe FNAF games. It would explain why they exist and have actual events accurate to Mike's life. Jeremy and Mike colaberated on it to try and actively give Fazbear Ent a bad name. It kind of worked, but after a little while It actually ended up backfiring. Much to Their dismay.

Jeremy published games where published under the alias Gerald, because he didn't want to use his actual name in case Fazbear Ent came after him, so he just cut off the first part of his last name and said "good enough". Not expecting them to actually get popular.

.

Mike draws at work in a little sketchbook he keeps in his pocket. He doodles lil drawings of Jeremy or Gregory, or the animatronics, or just funny things that happened throughout the day.

Once he left one of his lil books at the pizzaplex, it fell out of his pocket. Roxanne found it and flipped through it. She returned it to him the next day with a page where he had drawn her ripped out. She keeps that page in her drawer in her vanity 'cus she's convinced she's Mike's favorite and it's actually pretty sweet. (to an extent she is. She's his favorite Glamrock animatronic.)

Sometimes whenever Mike is running the daily diagnostics she'll ask to see his sketchbook, most the time he doesn't answer or he'll tell her to be quiet. But once she nagged him enough and he was too tired to sit there and listen to her nag him for the 7 minutes it takes to run them so he let her look through it.

[heavenbat-gw2]

1 fact about everyone, maybe about the weapons they like?

Each character already has their usual weapons listed on their refs, but I’ll go a bit more into detail here about that! and also give a minor update on Jozzik’s preferred weapons lol.

Tix: Favors dual-wielding a knife and an axe, though she will occasionally switch the knife out for a focus, or switch it all out for a Greatsword. She doesn’t tend to actually buy into the Reaper archetype much, but she does like swinging around a big sword sometimes. Her weapon aesthetic tends to be black/white/silver, with various curving edges and simple yet elegant designs. Sort of like weapons that echo wrought iron designs.

Damok: When he’s working alone he tends to favor the shotgun (he’s an excellent marksman even with his failing eyesight), but when he’s working with others he’ll switch to sword/shield combo to draw fire to himself. He leans towards rustic/old/simple weapon designs.

Amatia: As a Pit Fighter, she’s opted to stick to purely unarmed fights. As such, she prefers to fight weaponless. When forced to use a weapon, she’ll basically use whatever’s available; she’s not picky and is a major opportunist. She’ll use improvised weapons just as readily as actual ones, if needed. Of course, she’d much rather just headbutt her opponents.

Darijja: Absolutely loves dual-wielding swords. She’ll switch to a shotgun if ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY (aka when she truly needs to keep some distance between her and her opponent) but otherwise she’ll stick doggedly to her swords. Much to her chagrin, her time in Elona has required her to resort to the shotgun almost exclusively. Those darn blinding effects. Her weapon aesthetic varies widely; she loves symbolic looking weapons (like her rose sword) but she also loves both human- and asura-designed weapons.

Jozzik: True to his self-given title of Magician, Jozzik sticks to either a staff or a scepter+torch/focus combo. The staff is used more for when he wants to do more damage to a wider array of opponents, whereas the scepter combo is his go-to choice for when he’s wanting to cause maximum chaos. His weapon aesthetic is… fairly obvious, really. Anything pretty/sparkly/pink. Though, notably, his scepter is…. a princess wand.

Abimuirne: Hammers. She won’t use anything else. This is entirely due to her time in the Mists; she uses hammers as an homage to Jalis, whom she is endlessly attached and loyal to. Doesn’t have a concrete aesthetic yet.

Heavenbat: Greatswords!! For a while he dabbled in hammers, but in the end settled on greatswords. Basically he just likes big weapons. If necessary he will resort to a longbow as a dragonslayer, but he’ll switch back to greatsword as soon as possible.