#this problem isnt going to fly with customers

[alsaurus-loves-dean]

.

[honeylikesyanderes]

pros and cons of dating the yanderes pt. 2 (yandate edition)

not proofread-

was sick when i finished it so pardon me if it sucks

18+ mdni pls

this is kinda crack and kinda serious at the same time tbh

icarus

pros

can fly

is a pretty boy

loves flowers

loves giving gifts

has wine mom energy

is rich

has pretty eyes

loves giving you kisses and hugs

you get free stuff all the time from his winery

carries water for you when you go out in case you get dehydrated

always pays attention to everything you touch when you guys go shopping

cons

will gaslight you for no good reason

is toxic

may cuss out your parents just because

loves to cause chaos

favourite colour is bright orange.

doesn't like milk

can be a bit messy

doesn't like to clean up feathers from his wings that fall around the house

ren

pros

is a sweetheart

extremely supportive

likes kids

is loyal to a fault

would do anything for his mate

is affectionate

can cook

physically and biologically incapable of cheating on you

makes art for you all the time

likes to bake and cook for you all the time

packs lunch for you when you have to go to work

bakes you world-class cakes for your birthday, anniversary and any other important days to you

your parents/friends will love him

cons

likes to drink orange juice after brushing his teeth.

drew

pros

will do house chores without you asking

is a middle-aged cat in human form basically

will indulge you in your guilty pleasures

super tall so you'll always feel petite beside him

will always apologise when he's wrong

will always protect you

can and will talk you out of bad situations

has a lot of connections and is willing to use them to help you out

cons

is a lawyer.

is death and is therefore desensitised to death and other related matters

can't feel much emotions towards anyone that isnt you.

minor drinking problem (even tho he cant get drunk)

not super touchy or super sexual

atlas

pros

has a lot of money and influence

will always spoil you

overprotective of you

loves to read

will write you edgar allen poe type poetry

can teleport!!

will make good impressions with your parents/friends

will threaten your coworkers if they're mean to you

has nice horns

will buy you a custom gun because 'it'll look cute on you''

cons

will probably kill your exes (even if you guys are on good terms)

is triggered by specific colours

likes to put gin in his cereal

trust issues x30000

might become distant when he's going through a tough time

always carries a tiny alcohol flask with him everywhere (even tho he canonically cannot get drunk)

anger issues towards everyone that isnt you.

avanti

pros

always horny

has quite a bit of money

very cute and conventionally attractive

is a streamer and gamer

great with his hands/fingers

affectionate, fluffy and shy with you

will always flirt with you and keep your relationship interesting

has fluffy ears and tail

likes alternative music and is open-minded

very assertive and can communicate his needs/wants effectively

cons

may flirt with fans as fan service

just a flirty person in general

bad with boundaries sometimes

likes to lick you just because

is a cat demon fr

true demon form is super scary and you're not allowed to see

always horny.

doesn't like apple juice

[thenixkat]

also apparently Kafka's monster form is supposed to based on an oni but like??? why didnt ya give it the tusk teeth then?? He would look so much cooler enemy kaiju used: dragon meteor with literal dragons yeah that would be concerning

going from maybe one boss monster with minions attacking at random. To a large organized number of boss monsters attacking at once with a humanoid daikaiju leading them also apparently Kafka's monster form is strong enough to be daikaiju class and I'd have to assume mushroom/Kaiju no. 9 is in the same category given it survived Kafka punching it really really hard yeah the kaiju are specifically attacking the Defense Force base and nothing else. Organized oh hey, Kaiju no. 10. Very red dragon person. With one eye.

yeah no shit the daikaiju that can understand human speech and plan isnt about to just stand there and let you organize yer troops infront of it i also like this design too. Its the cross-shaped eye-opening that's lined with teeth

the dragons are bullet proof Kafka giving good advice for taking out the lesser dragons their weak spots on are their backs since their fronts have to be heavily armored to protect them while flying the dragons are using squad tactics huh rich girl got a custom weapon, which are made from teh stronger kaiju she has a really big axe

big red dragon came out here to attack strong humans and its having a blast big red dragon: Hey human you should be proud, most kaiju wouldnt have lasted this long against me. After I eat you I'll be even stronger

Ichikawa reminding Kafka to pls not transform, he'd be in a lot of danger if he transformed, they are a team they'll watch his back so there's no need for him to go kaiju b/c Ichikawa is a very responsible young man who cares alot about his friends also backup has arrived

red dragon is also very nonchalant about being dismembered and decapitated. WHich again if those arent important body parts you can afford to not care. SO long as its core is intact and it has the energy reserves to do so it can just heal

also i like how the tail movements are being animated too. It has yet to use its tail as a weapon but the animators are consistently remembering that its there and to have it move appropriately as the critter moves

big red dragon is really happy about having found an opponent that can rival its strength. It is really looking forward to eating the vice-captain nah yall in the control room celebrating too quick the vice-captain triggered a mode change in the big red dragon it got bigger again i really like big red dragon's design too

just the eye in a mouth

also Kafka's inner kaiju sensed big red dragon's mode change and whent 'hey that's a problem be aware' and apparently big red dragon's mode change is reading as stronger than Kafka's kaiju form so i suppose that's why his inner kaiju perked up and started paying attention also interesting that the kaiju have to vent heat from their transformations

i've no fucking idea where they're getting all their energy but turning it to mass causes excess heat that has to be vented off something we also saw when Kafka got first turned into a kaiju was steam coming off his bodyand him exhaling it i will assume that kaiju in general here must be fairly heat tolerant and given how effected different ones are to teh cold rounds, might not be super tolerant to the super cold temps (tho with at least one exception i've heard of) with that hypothesis I wanna see how Kafka does in winter

Kafka, pls, sir…

there's a reason Ichikawa doesnt want you to transform while there's monster slayers everywhere who will try to kill you if they see you as a kaiju local 32 yr old causes teen friend to gain grey hairs. Unfortunately, Ichikawa's hair is white so no one notices big red dragon is commanding the lesser dragons to suicide bomb the vice captain i have to assume big red dragon gave the lesser dragons the ultimatum of 'do what i say or i eat you' and better to kill themselves at its command than fuck around and find out vice captain tried to sneak attack big red dragon but big red dragon grew more eyes near rthe weak spot he was going for its almost like that kaiju is intelligent and can freely shapeshift yeah he got hit hard. Still alive but like sir you probably have a concussion and internal bleeding

yeah Tiger lady shows back up to shoot the big fucking dragon with her big fucking gun b4 Kafka risks it all to try and save the vice captain who just got caught and was about to get ate I know her using a tiger to brace herself against while she shoots is suppose dto be cool. But I cant get past the irresponsibility of the exotic pet ownership and not even giving the tiger any ear protection while she shoots. There's big ass intimidating breeds of dogs, why not use a big fucking dog instead of just distracting exotic pet ownership played for attempted coolness? oh hey teamwork

vice captain is gonna be going straight to the fucking hospital after this whit how he's treating his body tiger lady shot its core

[theceolacanther]

after a long and deliberate time thinking about it, and having many people asking me to expand my thoughts i will

its so cool how coustas' character arc is!!!! RAHHHH its really sad how he gets disabled by a mistake he makes, and because of that he has to go into a wheel chair, or whatever the equivalent name is (because it has goat feet instead of wheels). and like. it has downsides! he hates being in it you can tell he feels so caged in and restricted! he cant use stairs in his aid, and people want to take his aid from him because its expensive. and he very clearly blames himself for it aswell! because he only dove into the flooded river to get his and his fathers stuff because of his childhood trauma, of growing up in a slum. he fears that because his dad is technically his master, teaching him performance arts, if he cant perform with his dad he'll get thrown away! which isnt true! the moment you see his dad he is so worried about his son! he is terrified he'll lose him! so coustas has all this guilt built up because he blames himself for getting hurt, and worries he wont be of use to his dad and coco and tartar seeing this decide to help! but instead of just magicking his legs better, because that would be weird and goes against the ideas of the arc, they make him a new prosthetic! they make him custom crutches which make him weightless and allow him to fly! he had a problem and instead of just erasing the problem they instead find a workaround! they take into account his needs and abilities and make him custom prosthetics that allow him to do what he wants!! without erasing his disability! huinrnsdabfbsak i think thats so sweet and cute and i love it so much and i love this series to much which makes what happens to them even more tragic and RAHHHH I LOVE WITCH HAT ATELIER!!!

thinking about coustas from witch hat atelier

i wanna do the thing where you finish the thought in a reblog like youre finishing the thought or expanding because people requested it but i just wanna do that this time guys

[equinoxiansystem]

i actually have a lot of passionate thoughts pet stores and the welfare of pets and i quite literally never see anyone talking about any of this, so im going to say a few things:

- pet stores should NOT be allowed to sell live animals of any kind, including feeder fish, mice/rats and insects. all of these animals are sourced from abusive irresponsible mills.

- fish are probably the #1 abused pet across the globe, they are viewed as decorations and objects, not living animals with needs. i dont think people quite understand how important this is until i spell it out for them: goldfish are supposed to normally live up to 15 years in captivity. and in ponds. neon tetras can live up to 10 years in captivity in good conditions. do you see the problem here? fish are not disposable decorations you keep for a year before you get bored and forget about them. they're long lived and have those lives to live.

- second note on fish because it is literally that bad: fish bowls are not suitable for ANY kind of fish, not even shrimp or aquatic snails. anything under 3.5 - 5 gallons is really pushing it, fish need space to swim, and to just generally exist, no matter how small. you can exist in a closet, sure, but would you wanna live in it?

- hamsters need a minimum of 550 square inches of enclosure space, a minimum of 6+ inches of bedding depth in order to display their natural burrowing habits, an appropriately sized wheel, and a sand bath. a hamster biting the bars of its enclosure or its owner, screaming, hissing, showing aggression, or hiding/running away isnt funny, or a sign that your hamster is an asshole. it means you're gravely abusing it and are seeing the results of said abuse.

- birds need cages with lots of horizontal space, referred to as 'flight cages', due to birds naturally flying horizontally in the wild, not vertically. birds also do not benefit from mirrors, they do not understand it is their own reflection, no matter how intelligent the bird. they just stress them out.

- the vast majority of pet store employees know absolutely nothing about reptiles and inverts, they usually refer you to the one person on shift who has generally taken it upon themselves to learn about these animals. as such, their care is generally very poor. one of my special interest is arachnids, and thus, i have a huge interest in tarantulas. most pet stores i see that have Ts have them in extremely small deli cups they can barely move around in, with no place to burrow and hide for terrestrial species, or no place to climb and hide for arboreal species. the running theme is animals in pet stores are slapped into the smallest amount of space possible with no regard to their well being or safety. that brings me to my next point:

- pet store rats are always kept in glass fish tank style aquariums with only the lid as ventilation. rats have extremely sensitive respiratory systems, and produce a high amount of ammonia in their waste. they need their living spaces to be large, active, with places to climb, nest and burrow, and to have open ventilation on all sides. pet store employees do not keep up with spot cleaning the bedding. this leads to guaranteed sick rats. i dont care if you dont like them, they deserve happy, healthy lives.

basically pet stores exist literally specifically to put money into their own pockets... they have never had it in their best interest to educate customers on proper animal care or sell them healthy animals. they want you to come back and keep buying things... be it more crappy products that break, or animals that don't last very long.

[grey-the-goose-art]

I never posted this doodle cos I didn't really like how it turned out but with all of these #lukanette feels flying around I thought "why not??"

This is from an au idea I had ages ago. I haven't done anything with it but here are the notes I had saved on my phone:

AU where Luka got the ladybug miraculous (he already has the pierced ears) and Marinette got the black cat miraculous. (Then later Adrien gets the turtle miraculous cos hes all about protecting his gal. )

In this au Luka returned home sooner from his study abroad. He was running late to school when he saw Fu fall and helped him get up. Adrien didnt make it far enough out of the mansion before being caught, so he never had the chance to run into him. Fu slipped Luka the miraculous and its later at home that Luka discovers the ladybug earrings and Tikki. Tikki and Luka get along really well and Luka is fairly mature for his age. The biggest problem they face in their relationship is that Luka and his family can't bake for beans. Once Luka learns what Tikki eats he panics a bit. He asks Juleka for help and she points him towards Marinettes family's bakery. It's practically love at first sight for both Luka and Tikki. Tikki adores Marinette right away and can't help but feel that Fu made a mistake when handing out the Miraculous. Luka and Tikki become regular customers and come by the bakery at least once a day. Luka is always hinting to Juleka that her friends (especially Marinette) should come hang out at their boat more often. Luka becomes Scarlet Beatle (he thinks the spelling is a nice nod towards his musical roots but really hes the only one who spells it that way)

Marinettes origin story is pretty similar to canon except now she has a sassy cat to boost her confidence and teach her to stand up for her convictions and screw the consequences. This is both a good and bad thing as Marinette now tends to get into more complicated and slightly ridiculous situations. Marinette still considers giving away the miraculous but Plagg tells her off and asks her whether or not she can really just sit by as everything around her is destroyed by hawkmoth. Marinette uses her destructive powers well but is much better at the planning and using the lucky charms than Scarlet Beatle. This drives Tikki a bit insane, Tikki loves Luka but shes super jealous that Plagg got Marinette.

Adrien is allowed to go to school after his almost escape and the gum incident still happens. Adrien feels awful and tries to apologize but Marinette has trouble believing him. After Adrien and Nino become friends, Adrien confides in him a bit about his current situation and how the gum incident really went down. Plagg happened to have been snooping in Adriens bag at the time and overheard. Plagg feels for the kid and non chalantly tells Marinette what's up. Marinette apologizes to Adrien and they become awkward almost friends. Adrien is constantly trying to prove himself and Marinette feels bad that she blew things out of proportion and tends to screw up around him.

This all changes when Marinette saves some of her classmates as Félin Noir. Before Marinette could escape to transform, alot of the students were cornered. Adrien jumped in to protect them and give them time to escape and ended up falling victim to the akuma. After the day was saved the classmates swarmed Scarlet Beatle to thank him and Adrien stayed off to the side looking glum. Félin came up and asked him what was wrong and Adrien said that he was basically useless and he couldnt even protect his friends. Félin gives him a peptalk and calls him a hero. She then runs off to detransform. Cue Adrien falling head over heels for the heroine. (He probably would have had a crush on Marinette had he not been convinced she hated him. At this point hes working so hard to be friends with her that the thought of having a romance with her hasn't crossed his mind.) Marinette detransforms in an alley and her and Plagg both agree that Adrien is a really good guy. Plagg then ruins the moment by suggesting that Marinette steal his phone. Marinette wants to get closer to Adrien but still has trouble talking to him in her civilian form. When shes out as Félin though Marinette doesnt have as much trouble talking to him and after saving him a couple times and having him protect her a time or two creates a pretty good relationship with him. She calls him kitten and they joke and pun back and forth. Marinette starts to develop a crush on him and Plagg becomes the biggest Adrienette shipper on the planet.

That however is where the love drama starts. Luka is in love with Marinette and Tikki is all for that Marinette train. Marinette is caught between liking her kind and supportive partner Scarlet Beatle and the protective sun child Adrien. Plagg is again all for that sweet Adrienette and will often sabotage Lukas (and consequently Tikkis) attempts at wooing Marinette. Meanwhile Adrien is head over heels for Felin.

Things get even more complicated later on. Hawkmoth has gotten more aggressive in his attacks and Fu determines that another miraculous holder is necessary. Fu was present for Felins hero speech and his hero senses went crazy for Adrien. Adrien is the first hero that Fu approaches directly. Fu becomes Adriens Chinese teacher so that they can meet in private and he starts teaching Adrien about the miraculous. Because of Adriens protective nature Fu entrusts Adrien with the turtle miraculous. Adrien joins the group and becomes the shield for team miraculous. Adrien and Scarlet Beatle get into it a bit though. Adrien feels that Scarlet isnt showing enough thought and care to Felin as Felin seems to take alot of the blows for him (similar to how chat noir does in canon) Adrien sticks pretty close to Felin and protects her. Being by his crush that much though causes Adrien to kind of clam up. He gets along well with the team but doesnt say a ton, especially at first.

Anyway that's all I've got (besides a couple of cruddy phone doodles) just figured I might as well post it somewhere 🤷‍♀️

[kiwidotcom]

Every single decision i make is wrong but holy fuck i do not want to work at this job anymore.

I need to vent somewhere where the automatic response isnt just "well its not that bad!!! Youre fine!!" Said one way or another.

This job is so unbelievably hard. I literally have nightmares about it almost every night.

So its a bussing job in a restaurant, but its in a hotel, and the amount of duties i have during my shift are unreal.

Polish cutlery, polish dishes, refill waters, refill ice, run food as soon as it comes up, stock 3 different clothes, stock hot towel rolls, stock bread folds, put away cardboard recycling, empty linen basket, empty glass recycling basket, clear empty plates from tables, clear empty tables, reset tables, stock plate liners, stock butters, take room service calls, set up room service, light candle type thing for room service, prepare room service receipts, run room service orders, put room service into computer, stock roll ups.

END OF THE SHIFT: go collect old room service, put away the patio that inexplicably keeps getting set up, take out garbages, fully take out all recycling and linen, put away bread station, clean ice well, polish everything, clean wine polishing trays, wipe fridge and doors, stock everything. And cash out

Its impossible to ever be on top of everything. Im probably missing a few things

And there are some caveats of course. Most of my duties involve being in the kitchen, while servers can remain mostly on the floor, and even when they have nothing to do, they do exactly that, so i end up running most of the food. Which puts me behind on my duties despite servers not even working during this time.

In order to run the food you must be able to detail it. There are about 30 dishes that change every week, and memorization is not something im good at nor something i thought i signed up for.

My right hand is disabled. No one knows this because you cant tell unless i show you, but it makes things incredibly hard. I didnt say anything in the interview because i genuinely didn't think it mattered but i didnt realize i would need to clear dishes a very very specific way. I drop shit. All. The. Time. I sent a knife FLYING the other day when i tried to pick it up.

Its impossible to work hard enough to get better at this job because literally every single shift, a new element is added to it.

Yesterday, i got put on expo a shift i have never been trained for. I asked the other expo about 11 times for advice and he never said any thing.

NOT ONLY WAS I PUT ON A SHIFT I HAVE NO TRAINING FOR, I WAS MEANT TO TRAIN SOMEONE ELSE????,

But while i was meant to be training someone at expo, there was no other person to fill my SA position, so just nothing was getting done?????

There was another SA and shes great, but 1 SA for a restaurant of over 30 tables, 4 of which seat 6 people, and room service, is not enough.

There was 1 thing, 1 single thing i felt good about yesterday and i was even telling the guy i was "training" how i did feel ok about it, and i came to the back, and my manager told me problems with it.

My manager then followed me to multiple tables, to check on me? Which gave me insane anxiety, or maybe he just wanted to assert dominance.

I told the guy im seeing at how upset i was that i was meant to train someone at a job i didn't know and he legit said "well just think of it as another perspective"

Holy fuck.

I dont want to quit for 2 main reasons. 1. I dont want another job on my resume that's less than 1 year. And 2. I cannot get jobs myself. Every single job I've gotten is through other people. I have no real skill, im insanely mentally ill which makes customer service hard for me. And i?? I guess?? Need money?? To live?

My nightmare last night was so hard. I do not want to go to work at all rn.

[thecartoonuniverse]

The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance Review

So I am uploading the script for the review here for everyone to see simply because I don't think I can get a video for this out before the show comes out. I spent all weekend at a convention and this is a huge script so I just haven't had the time/energy to make a full video. That being said, enjoy the review!

In 1982, audiences everywhere were introduced to the awe inspiring world of Thra in the Jim Henson film: The Dark Crystal. It was a beautiful tale of an alien world that begged for more development! Plans for a sequel were made, but ultimately it never got around to happening in movie form.

Now, after 37 long years, The Dark Crystal is finally returning in the form of a new series, albeit as a prequel called The Dark Crystal: Age of resistance, which is arriving on Netflix on August 30th.

I might say this a lot in this review, but I cannot believe that this show exists. I couldn’t even believe the original film existed when I first saw it. The Beauty of this world is really hard to summarize… so I won’t. You’re going to get the full story (and you’re gonna like it).

Imagine, if you will, 17-year-old me watching TV one day to see a show called Jim Henson’s creature shop challenge. Every week contestants had to face a different challenge where they made puppets based off of the given theme. The episode I happened to watch tasked the participants with making a skeksis. Of course I was like, what the heck is a skeksis? So, I googled it (not sponsored) and what I found blew. My. Mind.

The Skeksis were one of just many many many many many… many insane creatures that exist in the film ‘The Dark Crystal’. The film itself was an eerily dark children’s tale following two human-like creatures known as ‘Gelflings’ as they travel the lands of Thra with the hope of healing their world. From there I quickly invested in the expanded lore: books, comics, and pretty much anything else I could find.

The stories were amazing, but nothing ever came quite close to the beauty that the movies captured. You see, this stunning alien planet was brought to us using nothing but puppetry. From the smallest little buggy boy, to the tallest long-legged-larry, everything that dazzled our senses was done using ground breaking puppetry from the Master himself: Jim Henson.

While I enjoyed the outside material, comics and prose never quite captured the marvel of advanced puppetry. When the new show was announced, I was a bit worried. Practical effects have been replaced by Digital ones in almost every corner of the industry, and it seemed certain that a return to the screen would mean embracing 3D animation.

But then they showed us the trailer… (show flash of the amazing action in the trailer).

And I was stunned.

Everything looked so amazing. The Action was insane, the cinematography was beautiful, and the puppetry… oh my god they did the whole thing with puppets! I couldn’t wait to see it.

Literally. I couldn’t wait. But thankfully I was sent all the episodes before they aired and now, I get to tell you guys what to expect and why you should watch. Because trust me, for the sake of all things beautiful and good in this world, you need to watch this.

There is so much I want to say, but this WILL be a spoiler free review!

Now there is much more to the story of the Dark Crystal than just two little elves saving the world! The story at its core are about the Urskeks, a group of higher dimensional beings sent to thra through the power of the dark crystal. When trying to return home, the Urskeks accidentally divide themselves in half, with each one becoming two new creatures, the Skeksis, and the Mystics. The skeksis are essentially pure evil and want to live forever. They increase their lifespan by draining the Crystal of its power and then using it to drain the life essence of other creatures. When a prophecy foretells of their downfall at the hand of gelflings, they set out to annihilate the entire species, but miss two infant gelflings who manage to find safety. These two gelflings, Jen and Kira, grow up, discover one another, and heal the crystal, which allows for the skeksis and mytics to merge into their true forms once again, and bring peace to thra.

That was basically the Spark Notes version of the Dark Crystal, but Gizmodo has an article that does a good job of summarizing the rest of the lore… though you can also just watch the movie!

Now if you are wondering what happens next then this show… ISNT going to be helpful. Instead, the age of resistance is a ‘prequel’ which flashes back to the time when the Skeksis could no longer rely on the crystal alone for life energy, and turn to sucking the life out of other creatures instead. This prompts the gelflings to fight back against the skeksis, forming, as the title suggest, the resistance!

The choice to make to make this a prequel series is something I was always ecstatic about. Unlike with any sequels, a prequel would allow us to get a view into what Gelfling were actually like as a species, and let me tell you the show does not disappoint on this front.

As we learn, 7 different clans existed, each with their own customs and unique physical appearance. In particular, the Vapra, Stonewood, and Grottan clans are featured the most in the series, although we do meet members from the other clans as well.

our three main characters each hail from one of these clans. Brea is a Vapran princess, Rian is a Stonewood guard to the skeksis, and Deet is the most adorable Grottan to ever exist.

I learned about all the clans in the recent Dark Crystal novels, but it was still amazing to see what they officially looked like.

And as for the main characters themselves, they are all pretty great.

It is pretty clear that Rian is supposed to be our Jen stand-in, but his personality is very distinct, so I do not have a huge problem with this.

On the other hand we have Brea, who does have a resemblance to Kira but only because they likely hail from the same clan. Otherwise Brea is very studious and loves reading and drawing.

That brings me to the odd one out, Deet. She has never been on the surface of Thra before, meaning that her positive and cheerful way of thinking will be tested when she faces the challenges set before her.

However, there is one other character that has a huge role in the series that I have yet to mention. That is of course Aughra, who is more or less the personification of Thra. That being said, she is basically an old grumpy woman. Personally, I was not a huge fan of her in the original movie. She seemed very unhelpful and too cryptic in her responses. Yet, she is definitely a more proactive character in the series, and I actually really grew to like her. As a being born from the ground of Thra, she of course does not want to see the world become corrupted, so her actions in this season make sense.

But those are just the humanoid characters, which are really not what I’m here for.

Where the real excitement begins is looking at all the Skeksis. Look at them! They’re hideous! Just as they’re meant to be. And unlike in the movie they are younger and not quite on the edge of death. It’s just really nice to see the Emperor ruling the Skeksis as he was meant to. Chamerlain is up to no good as usual, and the rest of the skeksis are pretty terrible as well. I just need to take a moment to appreciate SkekMal. He is the only one who is not already decrepit, and he makes use of all four of his arms to hunt gelflings. He’s terrifying, but terrifyingly beautiful (don’t judge me).

Their counterparts the urRu don’t play the biggest part this time around, which is hard for me to forgive since they were my favorite creatures from the movie. But they have purposely hidden themselves from the outside world so their lack of presence makes sense.

And the rest of the animals in Thra are adorable. Llike with the original film, there are plenty of moments that will have you pausing your screen to get a better look at the amazing creatures inhabiting this world.

It really is indicative of the most important thing of all: The puppetry

For the most part, it is extremely well done. The Skeksis in particular have the best range of emotions, despite having just eyes and a beak to work with, and the other animals are really neat to look at, as I said.

I wish I could say the same for the gelfling, but the puppets are not quite there yet. In particular, their mouths just can’t provide the range of motion that human mouths can. This is due to their faces being made of latex, so their movement is limited. The eyes however are perfect.

That brings me to something many of you may be wondering about. Yes, CGI is used, and you can for the most part tell when it is because any of those elements move better than the rest of the world around them. For example, often the skeksis’s tongues were animated, and it is clear that some creatures are computer generated in their entirety. I mean I do understand, since making things fly or move in very precise ways is difficult with puppetry. Overall the show is beautiful and the CG is not that big of a deal.

Now that we got that out of the way, let’s talk about the story. While it was never like the reason to watch the Dark Crystal, the prequel really dives deep into the lore and expands on it. However, it also attempts to re-explain everything that was previously learned, meaning that there are occasionally long sequences of just explaining things. I enjoyed them, but this may not be the case for everyone.

With that there is also a boat load of characters. For more dedicated fans they may see a lot of familiar faces from the novels that have been releasing for the past few years. However I did feel like the introduction of some of these characters, such as Naia and Kylan, was rushed and kind of went unexplained as to how they got to meeting up with the main characters unless you have read the books. Not that they have the biggest roles in the show, I just feel like for more casual fans them being in the story will feel pointless.

But that being said, holy crap this show is dark. Ha ha, dark crystal, yeah of course it’s dark. But I mean this show is gruesome. Yes, the movie was pretty dark, but imagine that but brought to a whole new level. Both kids and adults alike are sure to get nightmares after this.

However, as someone who loves anything animated and hopes for more story-based shows, Age of Resistance is everything I could’ve hoped for and more. It doesn’t really pander to old fans in the way that some series revivals do. Some people may be mad at any small change, but I for one welcome them as they allow the new series to become something much greater than the movie could ever be.

And looking at the marketing for the show, it seems like both Netflix and the Jim Henson company want this to be a huge success. I’m talking funko pops, action figures, an extensive social media campaign, tie in books, a video game, a panel at the biggest stage at SDCC plus a whole booth, and even a comic which is a prequel to this prequel series.

And I don’t blame them. It took YEARS to get this made. There are so many different puppets that had to be made, I cannot believe this was actually pulled off. I’m talking dozens of gelflings, almost every skeksis, mystics, podling, other creatures, plus the environments had to be made by hand and be unique to each location.

Even if you aren’t a big fan of the story, I urge you to watch this show for the visuals alone. Trust me, it is worth it.

I also want to quickly mention, for the ten people that actually watch this that have gone head first into anything to do with the Dark Crystal, that I don’t really know if the books fit in perfectly with the series. This timeline released by Gizmodo does not include the novels at all despite what I heard about them being canon. Plus, from what I saw, unless I am totally wrong, certain things are retconned. This was kind of disappointing since I have been loving the novels, but it would definitely be hard to make everything work out since the main characters from the books are more like side characters in the series.

But still seriously read the books they’re amazing.

So that is pretty much what I thought about Age of Resistance without spoiling too much. I love this show a ton, so I hope everyone that watches this review gives it a chance, and then tells all their friends about it as well.

In an article, the creators said they have two more seasons planned, so we need to make sure they happen! I don’t want this to be another instance of a great show on Netflix being cancelled because not enough people watched it.

Do it for the puppets.

[tibalt-the-fineblooded]

Tibalt’s Fanwalkers: Listed

In preparation for upcoming and eventual Fanwalker Fridays (or general asks and buffoonery), I am making this list of my Fanwalkers in order of creation. Short Descriptions will be followed by a longer Bio under a cut. Short and Sweet: 1. Ceral Redd (RBU) He/Him, Storm Mage Human from Kaldheim, has a pet kaladeshi dragon whelp named Raz 2.Laan Dovar (GR) He/Him, Geomancer/Size Manipulator Half-Kor/Half-Elf from Zendikar 3. Except (WGU) She/Her/They/Them, Healer Elf Simic Mimic from Ravnica with no memories of being from Ravnica, Old Walker 4. Y’lona (WB) She/Her, Cursed/Blessed Leonin from Theros 5. Zoya (R) She/Her, Blacksmith Vulshok from Mirrodin New Phyrexia 6. Atlan (WRU) He/Him, Jeskai Monk Djinn from Khans Tarkir 7. Sturn Dregg (BU) He/Him, ‘Skeleton’ Pirate ‘Pseudo Lich’ Death Mage Human from Ixalan 8. Samuel Dusken (WBU) He/Him, Elf Vampire Spirit Summoner from Innistrad, feeds on spirits not blood, Old Walker 9. Kitai Skalto (W) She/Her, Benalish Knight/Glass Mage Human from Dominaria 10. Aseri Kalot (WGR) She/Her, Saytr Beast Summoner from Theros, uses blood-ink tattoos to summon monsters whose blood is in the tattoos 11. Cas Anova (WR) He/Him, Reinforcement Magic/Pyromancer Cowboy Human from Unnamed Plane (wherever Angrath is from)

Bio’s under the cut (sorry mobile users)

Here’s the collection of bio’s for my fanwalkers. This will contain an overall what’s up and some base physical traits. I’ll try to keep it reasonable in length so that I don't clog up your dashes for too long!

1. Ceral Redd, 5′10, glowing purple eyes

Currently a resident of Kaladesh, Ceral has shifted from his previously violent ways to a more focused lifestyle. He spends much of his time traveling from plane to plane chasing legends and rumors, and studying weather patterns in hopes of getting strong enough to tame the storm that ravages his home. He wields the magics of what he hopes to calm, lightning and fire to ice and wind. Having spent several years on Kaladesh, and having worked within the Izzet League, Ceral picked up on how to work with artifice and uses his skills to improve the two red mana batteries he keeps on his person. Ceral has spent much of his time in recent months raising his dragon whelp Raz.

2.  Laan Dovar, 6′2, light green eyes

Hoping to set an example, Laan helps those he comes across in his travels. He spends mush of his time traveling the more dangerous areas he finds, fond of high cliffs and deep valleys. While he's born of two cultures, he takes pride in both. His magic is just as mixed; with a skill in geomancy that allows him to control not only rock and earth, but also sand and even lava. His size manipulaton only allows him to change his own body in a range of passing for a giant to his own height, he can not shrink any smaller than that. While his Kor father has been dead for several years, Laan still returns to visit his Elf mother on Zendikar and catch her up on his travels.

3. Except, 5′4, brown eyes

A simple healer on the outskirts of a Leonin village, Except is anything but. Having spent over one hundred years on Theros as a six armed human with a Leonin tail, Satyr horns and the crest of a Merfolk, she is a respected member of their community. The villagers come to her for injures and illnesses that they cannot treat and the young enjoy playing with someone who can take any form they ask. She was once from Ravnica but lost any memories of that time when she first sparked, believing she is from Theros. Her shapeshifting abilites stem from her being a Simic Combine expirement to create a mimic from a non-mimic being. Except now uses her abilities to take on the hurts of her patients to learn how best to treat them. She only recently started planeswalking again when her adopted Leonin daughter Y'lona sparked.

4. Y’lona, 5′6, dark brown eyes

Only recently a planeswalker, Y'lona is still adjusting to all that there is to learn about it. She is also adjusting to the oddities that are her new planeswalking mentors; the long time patients of Except, her adoptive mother, Ceral Redd and Laan Dovar. The main task the three older walkers have agreed upon is that Y'lona needs to bring her newfound powers under some semblance of control. She had managed, in a state of terrror and confusion, to agree to the biddings of both an Innistradi Demon and Angel. One a curse to harm, the other a blessing to heal; Y'lona can't do one without doing the other. Neither contract was completed, which prevents her from choosing one and she will be stuck with both. 

5. Zoya, 6′4, gold eyes

Having accepted her home of Mirrodin as a lost cause, Zoya has found some peace in focusing in her craft. A blacksmith by nature, she joined the Boros Legion after landing on Ravnica and is very happy to take any style of order. Due to this, she is very aware that others like her come from all over to get custom pieces and parts of weapons and armor made. Zoya has long since been able to tell who can and can't travel off of the plane, aware that even other members of the Legion aren't what they seem. She doesn't mind and has no plans to out any one of a shared secret. When she isnt doing work for orders, Zoya falls into old practices as a way of mourning for friends and family lost on her old home.

6. Atlan, 8′2, pale blue eyes

A follower of the Way and trapped in a time he never could have dreamed of, Atlan has to hold this secret close to protect himself. When he stepped into a different timeline, Atlan lost everyone he had ever known and his sorrow and confusion threw him even further to land on Kamigawa. Making his way back to Tarkir, he found that he was supposed to be missing and has been leading a double life ever since. His goal is to master ghostfire, but he knows he must first master the types of fire he's already learned. Atlan is also working on improving more than his physical and magical abilites, having taken up various games of wordplay, strategy and puzzles.

7. Sturn Dregg, 5′8, deep blue eyes

Stowaway turned sailor turned captain, Sturn has spent most of his life sailing the seas of Ixalan. His ship, the Hangman’s Orchard, and crew currently reside at the bottom of those seas while Sturn works on repaying the survivors of the Hours on Amonkhet. After sparking, he landed on the desert plane grievously injured and was saved from death. Once this debt is repaid, he planes on returning to Ixalan to raise the Orchard once more. Sturn is unsure of whether he wishes to travel the multitude of worlds available to him or if he will remain with his skeleton crew, haunting the seas of his home. 

8. Samuel Dusken, 5′9, silver eyes

One of the last scions of the House Dusken on Innistrad, Samuel is also one of the planes last elves. After the ritual which turned the houses into vampires, Samuel took to researching a way to give his family an edge over all the others. Freedom from the need for blood while retaining the powers already gained. He took a self imposed exile until he successfully removed the thirst for blood, changed instead to a thirst for the essence of the lingering souls that haunted every corner of the multiverse. However, during his absence, Samuel's house had fallen from power in a war with House Maurer and scattered across the plane. He spends his time searching for a way to recreate his success with his now limited power and tracking down his scattered family.

9. Kitai Skalto, 5′10, green eyes

As both a Benalish Knight and a Glass Mage, Kitai has very little free time to pursue her interests across the multiverse. What time she does have is spent learning various fighting styles from friends she's made on previous trips from her home. Her magic allows her to create various things out of glas, from swords and shields to wings she can fly with. Kitai longs for adventure but is faithful to her duties, knowing that the only way to pursue her desires would be to embark upon a pilgrimage by herself. She wishes to prove herself before hand and thus returns to Benalia for her duties without fail. 

10. Aseri Kalot, 4′11, brown eyes

Never in one place for too long, Aseri can always find somewhere to keep her entertained. She is spending her time traveling the multiverse to share the beauty of  Nyx with any and all. Her unique style of summoning allows her to bring forth beasts that she has tattooed onto her own skin, with ink mixed with the beasts' blood. When summoned, these beasts take on the aspect of the Theros sky and resemble the Nyxborn of Aseri's home. Her favorite places to visit are Ixalan and Naya, and she has several tattoos from both. Despite her love of the starfield, Aseri doesn't visit her home very often.

11. Cas Anova, 6′, light brown eyes

A lone ranger kind of guy, Cas does what he can to try and make things better. He refuses to leave any place he's visited without solving a problem or two, even if it's only helping to repair a stable or going out to help deal with a few bandits. His pyromancy isnt the strongest but it allows him to fire small flames from his finger tips that explode on contact. Cas balances out his less than powerful offensive magic with reinforcement magics that can protect him from harm or make him slightly stronger. Having left behind his parents and younger siblings to help make the multiverse a slightly better place, Cas visits whenever he feels homesick.

Thank you for reading to the end! I’m hoping that my crew will entertain you in the future. My current goal is to get art for everyone and, hopefully, keep the list at 11. My asks are also open for more than Fanwalker Fridays and I’m always willing to answer questions!

[the-firebird69]

i actually dont see our brand Zues Hera nope not there Thor Freya so we look now and ck and find it nowhere in big magazines and go to small ones all the damn day long Hera Zues and we ck and no.  so we look now to get it in as she suggested. and we see tons who like it want it..and we do it..and we sell our rta version and put it in as that...it is not a kit car and he can advertise he assembles them neglecting to say he builds them lol which workstoo as a starter. and i see it wow..good. and your new one will sell tons of the kits yes and tons are in asking now.  it is a huge crowd and friends. yes. and some arent so friendly but we do business. tons in.  huge lots. too.   we sell a complete line of products well we sell a line sebastian says.hge lots of cars and bikes and now lawn and garden machines and tons of them huge numbers and all are like the ones in the 80′s you assemble them and they have warrantees. it is nice work too they are quality.  as were the first few years....of the mags types.  huge losses no...yes we seel tons. and it is on we do this and get him th bike see where and it is impossible to talk to these idiots they are mean as hell.  we use it now on them.  we want out need it sebastian says.... huge inquireis aobout the race safety and procedure and cordon off monsters giants and more. and we agree it is for all..and now tons. a nd it is on they say we go htere and prep. it is enormous the response and from ours are we licensed to do that huge questions.  massive quesstions. and we hear this..we want him well now. and work. and tons do. and hear it all over nope and yes. your out then you louses fight nothing and nobody we win. and take them down we hire now and we want that too for you.   to seeyou do ok here at least... and we see she had an issue made and flooded an area a small one. they were dismayed eah and every one of them called said who and we want to know..now. and then this fake....and tons were grabbed and arrested for mocking you. tons. and all were morlock no.  half.  half macs yes mostly macs . and we see it now. they are insane.  fed it though lol.  and garth is in the middle  and fun. ok.  where he cannot be. and now macs  are dismayed why what is your plan say sim back to me..sym mac says and i tis chinese for sympatico no it is a chinese name. they know it too and yes are the chans. and he says ruined me but i have wealth have stock in it and such. ok. and your him one of hte owners and we sahre stuff and work and like before but not on such mockery lame project we both got an a for it lol. wei and caa did a project and they got an a. a copy company startup. and it was situated well and had a business look. both said. and were congradulated it did. after thier project two days after,  company moved in had a new name was copying and it was  Kinkos and to geet the kinks out...now this is it one of his companies yes. tons followed it and heard his suggestions, high speed only.  no customer copies here and more no.  he said you do that and out front and get business and be graciuos and nice tons saw it take off copied it lol ahaha.  and they wer efamous for it lol...tons said it too he is a son yuor copy.  i started laughing made my own company same buiding in china took thiers and named it Copy cops and he said yours and need to  yu shall see and i did an wow this is it helped.  tons. and fun too. hahaha lol. hwat aholes.  and wei is limited as you did with ghwb and in his coutnry like a prison and gets freer daily no has to elimninate all macs as most konw now. and mac says i ts on and says we copy it out lol nad nah we are the copy cops and haul  i t. ok similar only. hahaah bad jokes makes one ill and then your resusitation will fail...well. if bja tries it. ok we hit the Morlock now. wee do too and us. and we have success and wie says what time is the race....and we say tommorrow well he cahnges it to saturday and both starting to bring in at nine am. aand the drag is at 11. and reasonable....now hiring pit crew laides to wear the simi pit women outfits and yes the fun ones ok..your ladies and we do too and im china wei says we hire you qe and ok one of the two races...oh race traitor hahahaha wei laughs so do i and macs frown....like bruce lee when he saw the big black guy...hahaah me ahaha lol.  ok we do this and then..whoah ok. hold up ok and ok. and we do it too hire our ladies and for the pit crews... and tons sign up to be thre. tons. and all famous and huge crowds will arrive brad died. mac has it. the race is on and it is colorful the metaphors and epiteths lol wow and this is it we will have to we think  their pricing is outrageous styles and more not greaat and the tech is not good.  we see them fret.  ouch this blows. and wei ahs some decent ones so many ppl too much time to fix  and thenohhhh awww fly away butterfly no way man this is it and we see. and tons are at them and he sees it. and then this we are ready  fun ok always says it then nope and we see this is fun we invite car and driver and other mags and tv too. they are ready...and come over. head down plow in and calm calm it is on your invited no problems. and ok..and they are better..yes.  and then la times we sent our man to storm still opened yes.  and said is this the la times..and no.  walked out got in a lambo and was off and yes a diablo they called the cops.  thught it was you.  and they were interogated and yes downtown. for hours..tons say it wow..they were there for it..and why we know china. and wie saw and heard it. and over at la times.  we see you there a gun in your pocket.  he handed them the invite and said your cordially invited and they said we know..and a box of cigars for the editor in la. and then it is not our area...it isnt hand it back he gestured oonly and no no we tke it to him..ok thanks...and walked out almost they said hold  it we need you to see him..and  he held it back out and he said thank you and your name, he said Seth Asser and he smiled ok Seth thank you..and good day used his name and i read the article on jerry springer loved it...left happy and he called the cops to report a sighting of you....and was interrogated...for hours. and hey laughed the Diablo left... and a trick no Hera buckin for the job Zues

https://www.caranddriver.com/features/g8514934/best-midsize-family-sedans/

[orbemnews]

For Britain’s Art Dealers, Post-Brexit Trade Isn’t So Free LONDON — “You could just jump in a van, drive to Europe and cross all the borders to buy decorative antiques. You’d drive straight back through French customs. It was seamless,” said Andrew Hirst, a British dealer specializing in old textiles, who in 2018 moved with his family to Ireland, after Britain’s vote to leave the European Union. Hirst’s business is still based in London, and he said he was concerned that the combination of Brexit and the coronavirus pandemic would put an end to his specialist trade. Britain left the European Union in January 2020, but it followed E.U. rules until a new trade agreement negotiated with the bloc came into effect on Jan. 1. But British businesses across a range of sectors, including art and antiques, are now discovering trade is not quite as free as they had hoped. Value-added tax, or VAT — a tax on goods and services that is usually paid by consumers — is now payable when importing artworks into Britain from the European Union, and vice versa. Dealers at every level of the trade are also encountering unforeseen administrative and transportation costs that are damaging their profitability. “I won’t be going to Europe to buy antiques like that again,” Hirst said. Britain was the world’s No. 2 market for art and antiques in 2019 after the United States, with $12.7 billion of sales — 20 percent of the total global market, according to the 2020 Art Basel and UBS Art Market Report. But owing to “turmoil with the rollout of Brexit,” the report added, Britain’s market declined 9 percent in 2019, while sales in France, Europe’s next biggest market, grew 7 percent. Since Jan. 1, collectors based in the European Union, where member countries set their own tax rates, now face VAT bills varying between 5.5 percent (France) and 25 percent (Denmark) on art or collectibles imported from Britain. (Britain charges 5 percent for items coming from the bloc.) “Brexit has made the U.K. a faraway country,” said Andre Gordts, a Belgian collector who is one of an unknown number of international buyers who quietly moved their collections after the Brexit referendum to avoid VAT payments. “It just makes things extremely difficult, enhancing the trade of bureaucrats and punishing hard-working artists and honest tradesmen in their galleries,” Gordts said. In 2016, he sold his London apartment and moved permanently to Brussels. “The only way out for British based galleries, I think, is to open a branch in the E.U.” Ursula Casamonti, the London-based director of Tornabuoni Art, a leading Italian gallery specializing in modern and contemporary art, with branches in Britain, France and Switzerland, said the dealership would now have to pay thousands of euros in administrative charges when moving artworks around to mount exhibitions. “The administrative, tax, shipment and timing costs for doing business in the U.K. have now increased,” she said. “While we still love the city, we now have a more negative idea about London as an international center for modern and contemporary art.” Victor Khureya, the operations director of Gander & White, one of Britain’s biggest specialist art shippers, said there had been a “quite significant” rise in the cost of transportation since Brexit. “There is a lot of administration, a lot of documentation and there are a lot of teething problems,” Khureya said. “It results in delays, which are costly,” he added, noting that a recent shipment had been delayed for 24 hours by a French customs officer who misunderstood the relevant forms. Khureya said that a shipment that before Brexit had cost about 250 pounds, or about $340, was now almost £1,000. If a work of art is worth many thousands of pounds, these shipping costs represent a relatively marginal increase. But Brexit has also resulted in punitive cost increases in the transportation of lower-value items. In January, Thomas Heneage, a long-established dealer in London specializing in art books, sold an item for £75, or about $100, to a customer in France, he said in a recent interview. The courier added charges adding up to more than $60, including a “fuel subsidy,” “Brexit adjustment” and “duties and taxes” that were almost four times what they usually charged, he said. The customer canceled the order, Heneage said. Disruption at the top end of the auction market, however, appears to be minimal, said Sebastian Fahey, the managing director of European operations for Sotheby’s. “For the vast majority of buyers and sellers at Sotheby’s, there is no change, post-Brexit,” Fahey said, adding that private individuals in the European Union represented only a “small minority” of the buyers at his company’s London auctions. He said that the new VAT charges for importing items into the bloc from Britain “will be no different to the situation they faced previously when they bought in non-E.U. locations, such as New York, or Geneva.” Some dealers and collectors in European Union countries with high taxes on the art trade, like Germany, see Brexit as an opportunity. “In terms of trade between Germany and the U.K., it actually has quite some advantages,” said Johann König, a leading Berlin contemporary art dealer who also has a gallery in London. König pointed out that art bought in Germany could be imported to Britain relatively cheaply and that pieces bought in Britain would be subject to import VAT of 7 percent, whereas Germany charged 19 percent on domestic transactions. “I believe that in the long-term, once a period of adaptation, and Covid, has passed, London will retain its importance within the European and global landscape as a major cultural hub,” König said. “We are continuing our activities in the U.K. and probably are going to even build it out more.” Hirst, the British textile dealer now living in Ireland, said he also saw opportunities in post-Brexit Britain — as long as he can stay in business. Until December, when government imposed a more stringent lockdown in England, he had been flying from Cork, Ireland, to London each week to trade every Friday and Saturday from an open-air stall at the popular antiques market on Portobello Road. Hirst said he expected thousands of small businesses to go bust, creating openings for those who survive. “There will be a lot of bankrupt stock,” Hirst said. “I may have to sell contemporary fabrics, rather than the beautiful old stuff I used to buy in Europe. “It’s adapt or die.” Source link Orbem News #Art #Britains #dealers #free #isnt #PostBrexit #Trade

[thekillershrub]

Rating Custom Kirby MTG Cards

I will be taking a look at various custom Kirby Magic the Gathering Cards that one can search on Google. Please request a character, reblog with cards I missed, or add an opinion if you like it. Also my opinions of the cards are not going to be evaluated correctly most of the time, so please explain where I am wrong.

What I am expecting: 

Ability to Copy abilities by taking them from an enemy by sucking. Similar to Duplicant

ConverseManiac123 - DeviantArt

Flavor: It gains its ability by sucking a creature. Keeping its stats is a nice touch as no matter what ability he has, he is still Kirby. Living Marshmellow is a lame joke. 3/5 (Decent Flavor)

Power: Firstly, the only way Kirby can use the second ability is by exiling a creature but choosing not to become a copy (if it is the only creature, it is forced to exile itself >.>). Either way it is 5 mana exile a creature and you either become a copy or most likely gain the stupidly powerful second effect 7/5 (Too Powerful)

parker1997  - DeviantArt

Flavor: Copying Power and Toughness doesn't really translate to Kirby well. Also only getting ally strength is another fail. Not enough sucking. The Copy ability is odd but does allow Kirby to copy a foe. Kirby is not this complicated! 2/5 (Some Flavor)

Power: It is a 5 mana creature that is permantely has the P/T of the highest creature you control, but with flying. But if you have no creatures, you are out of luck. Copy is insane since you stack abilities and isnt even tap, but still requries a total of 8 mana and a creature on the field to work. 4/5 (slightly underpowered)

MTGCardSmith - Removed (If you know who to credit, please comment)

Flavor: You touch the Kirby, you...die? I guess the sucking is dealing damage and killing it to gain the ability? Also, like the first example, I like how you keep Kirby’s toughness. Also, like the game you can lose your ability by getting hit or if you want to. Kirby can also get infinite abilities. 3/5 (Decent Flavor)

Power: Seems pretty bad. No one would ever block Kirby or attack with ground creatures if he is on the field. I am also not sure how the abilities interact with each other since you take and deal damage at the same time, though you probably get to choose the order. 4 mana is pretty cheap though. Also huge colorpie break! 3/5 (Underpowered).

Blueflare787 - MTGCardsmith

Flavor: KIRBY COPIES EVERYTHING!!!!! 2/5 (Some Flavor)

Power: You either get a 4/4 for 5 with a million abilities, or you get no abilities and get tap to Exile a creature every turn. 6/5 (slightly overpowered)

MTGCardSmith - Removed (If you know who to credit, please comment)

Flavor: Another interesting take on Kirby’s copy ability, but this time it is by countering a spell and using it once? Doesn’t really fit. 1/5 (Flavor Fail)

Power: 5 mana for a 1/2 creature that counters any Instant or Sorcery and makes a copy that you have to pay mana to cast. Seems fun and balanced to me. 5/5 (Balanced)

domfradley - MTGCardsmith

Flavor: So this Kirby eats all the friendly creatures to increase its attack? Uggg. 1/5 (Flavor Fail)

Power: This is awful. 0/5 (Unplayable)

PatsyPotato - MTGCardsmith

Flavor: Using the Unstable mechanics for Kirby actually fits well, though it still doesnt involve sucking or even killing the enemy to get the textbox. Also Kirby devoured the Colorpie. 2/5 (Some Flavor)

Power: 5 Mana for a very big booty that no one will ever attack into. 2/5 (Almost Unplayable)

Biblio - MTGCardsmith

Flavor: Kirby as a Weird is freakin hilarious. This one absorbs creature’s life forces to become slightly stronger. And this one can actually suck! 2.5/5 (Almost Decent Flavor)

Power: Ya...all the abilities combine with a 2/5 for 4 is pretty strong. Not too bad, but still busted. 6/5 (Slightly Overpowered)

MockMtG- Twitter

Flavor: Finally a card which actually did sucking decently. Kills a creature, gains its power and activated ability (which is a nice tough), and keeps its original toughness! 4/5 (Lots of Flavor)

Power: This is a repeatable exile effect that grants Kirby more and more abilities. The power resets after each suck, which is awkward. This also costs 7 mana of 3 colors, which is definitely over costed. I would rather have a Duplicant in almost all scenarios. 4/5 (Playable)

Luigifan - MTGCardsmith

Flavor: This is one of the most interesting takes on Kirby. Imprint screams Kirby and this one actually has flying! Then Kirby can discard his power and spit it at an enemy and get a new one! Great Kirby! 5/5 (Perfect Flavor)

Power: Oh boy is this overpowered. It is a little slow, but it has good stats and an easy Imprint ability. But that is not bad. The problem is the second ability where you can do 6 (or 8) damage to the player. The damage is wayyyy too high. 7/5 (Too Powerful)

[agilenano]

Agilenano - News: Workshop Organization Ideas

We are finally making some progress in our garage and Im here today to show you our new dust collection system and a peek at one side of our (semi) organized garage workshop!

Would you believe it if I told you that Corey and I have been homeowners for 9 years now and we have never had an organized workshop?

Never, ever.

Weve tried. Ohhhhh have we ever tried. Once we even got far enough to organize our garage and make some progress on the workshop space that we hadbut if were being honest it was really never all that functional.

Nine years, yall. Its a little pathetic.

But. But! We are finally making some progress in this house with the garage and I think that by the time we hit 10 years of owning a home (in August!), well be there.

Fingers crossed.

Were taking a one wall at a time approach to organizing our garage here, and Im feeling really good about how far things have come.

I think that one thing that has always held us back from really getting our workspace organized is that I havent ever felt like I truly have the expertise to do it myself, so Ive waited for a time when Corey and I can work together. The problem is, Corey works full time out of the house and doesnt handle chaos well so on the rare times that we have had the ability to work on it together, he immediately gets overwhelmed and doesnt know what to do!

So basically what Im telling you is that for the last 9 years every time we try to organize our workshop it ends with us both standing in the middle of the garage staring at each other and shrugging our shoulders before giving up and heading back inside to watch television.

Were a good team.

But I finally decided theres absolutely no reason I cant tackle this on my own. I know enough about these tools to know how they should be stored, and honestly Im the one who uses the workshop the most so why shouldnt I decide where it all goes?!

Ive put hours and hours into working out there over the last few weeks and things are finally starting to look so, so good.

I mean I cant complain about this before and after.

Today I wanted to share a few of the tips, tricks, and tools that were using in our garage to keep things organized. Our biggest problem in the past has been that we never really found a space for every single thing out there, so any progress we made was immediately undone as soon as we did a project.

This time around, Im determined that eeeeeeeeverything will have a home, and so far its working!

Againkeep your fingers crossed for me. Toes too, maybe .

So, lets dive into the tricks Im using in this garage that gives me hope Ill keep it more organized than ever before.

Garage Organization ideas, tips, & tricks

This post is sponsored by Rockler, but all opinions and enthusiasm are all me. Thanks for supporting the brands that support Love & Renovations!

1. A dust collection system

This is the one that always makes everyones ears perk up when I mention it on Instagram. A dust collection system will CHANGE YOUR LIFE, I promise. Its definitely more expensive than just using a plain ol shop vac, but its approximately 7 million times more efficient and there are tons of options to customize it!

How does a dust collection system work? Its basically a ginormous shop vac that can attach to the walls in your workshop, and you run a hose off of it that can be attached to the various tools in your shop.

For example, we have one hose running right off of the dust collector that we use to clean the floors, and for quick vacuuming of work surfaces. Then a little further down theres a port we can attach to for the miter saw or other mobile tools in the shop. Further down is another port that is at the perfect spot for use with our lathe, and at the end of the wall is one last port thats meant to be attached to the table saw.

So, every time we use pretty much any tool in our shop, we can quickly hook it up to the vacuum, turn it on, and not have any dust flying around as we work.

I probably dont need to spell this out for you but less sawdust flying around means less sawdust all over my garage floorwhich means less sawdust that gets tracked inside my house.

And that means less cleaning for me!

You see why Im so excited about this situation?

A large dust collection system like this isnt necessarily going to be the most logical investment for the casual woodworker or DIYer, but if youre doing regular projects in your workshop and struggle to keep up with the mess, its really truly worth it. I dont have an exact pricing of what our system looks like, but you should easily be able to set up a similar setup with the tools linked below for less than $1,000.

You can also read more about our dust collection system here from when we first got it!

Heres a rundown of the tools and accessories we have with our dust collector:

Dust Collection Tools + Accessories

This is the newer version of the wall-mounted dust collector we have (ours is several years old and isnt available anymore)

Heres a multi-port tool set that allows you to switch between several different tools.

Heres what the extender hose looks like they have various sizes so you can get exactly what works for your space.

This is the remote switch we have its a little luxury but makes it so nice to be able to turn it on from anywhere in the shop without walking back to the dust collector!

This is the quick change shop and tool set it has the main vacuum connector we use (for cleaning off worktops, etc.) and the floor vacuum, which is probably my most used connector!

And finally, these are the hooks we used to attach the hose to the wall!

If you want to learn more about all of the dust collection system tools and accessories that Rockler offers, just click here to go to the main page. The customization options are essentially endless, so you can mix and match to get exactly what you need!

2. Drawer Organizers

This was a bit of an unexpected hit for me we recently got a new fancy workbench for the garage that has drawer liners in it already (so things dont slide around) and I honestly figured we wouldnt need any additional organization beyond that.

Oh, how naive and foolish I was.

We got to try Rocklers Lock-Align drawer organizer system and hooooooly cow its a game changer. I can find exactly what I need in the drawers within seconds, and since things have a very specific place within the drawer (remember the goal, here?!), its a breeze to clean up when were done.

Also, theres something oh-so-satisfying about opening up a drawer to get a tool and having everything hyper-organized and looking all pretty.

Its the little things, you know?

Drawer Organization Accessories

We grabbed this Lock-Align master kit and its a great way to get started with getting your drawers organized.

This bit organizer is hands down my favorite thing we added for those pesky loose bits that always seem to get lost. Its magnetic, too, so they stay put!

A few of these larger bins and these small ones are great for all the loose things that get lost in your drawers. I use them for pencils, long drill bits, keys, and more.

I also love, love, love this screwdriver rack and this pliers rack for not only screwdrivers and pliers but also scissors and other long skinny things that take up space in the drawers!

There are tons more drawer organizer options just click here to see everything Rockler has in their Lock-Align system. I honestly want to use it for my kitchen too, now! Is that weird?

3. storage for very specific purposes.

Heres where we really dive into the have a place for everything mentality. Over the years Ive learned that a few things that aaaaaalways tend to float around our workshop with no home are the following three things:

Shop towels

Hand sanitizer

Cleaning wipes

Were constantly using them, and so weve always just kind of left them all out on the workbenchbut then they get used and dont make it back to the workbench (since thats not really an official home), and basically I spend half my time in the workshop looking for those three dang things.

In addition to that, we always are in need of a small dumping ground. When Im doing projects its often while Grant naps, and when he wakes up I need to quickly clean up my mess before he starts getting into things I dont always have time to actually put everything away. So, I tend to just dump stuff on the workbench.which means its constantly messy and we have to spend 20 minutes cleaning it up before we can work on it.

So, I needed to solve both of these problems and I found a way to do it with just some simple metal shelves!

I added on shelf above the small workbench that holds our hand sanitizer, cleaning wipes, and a spare roll of shop towels. The other shelf hangs on the side of the small workbench and it holds a roll of shop towels as well, and has a little ledge that has become our dumping ground. Its perfect because its small (which means Im forced to deal with it regularly), it has a ledge all around so small things dont fall off, and its right next to the door so I can toss things in it without even stepping foot in the garage.

So far these two little shelves alone have made a world of difference in things feeling more organized in here. Dont you love it when a big problem is solved by something so tiny and easy?!

I also got our wood glue organized with a wood glue caddy (linked below) and it genuinely makes a world of difference. Wood glue is another thing that is always getting moved around and lost, and I love that we have this little storage system for all of our glue, our brushes, and everything else so that we can move it around as we need to without losing anything.

The lesson here? Get specific! If you have a problem with something always getting moved around or lost, look for solutions for that specific thing and make a new home for it.

Shelving Options

Heres the shelf I have above the workbench.

Heres the shelf I have hanging on the side that also holds shop towels.

This is the wood glue caddy that Im obsessed with and as a bonus, heres the silicone glue holder Im really loving right now too.

This utility caddy is a great option for things like your tape measure, scissors, and pencils.

And this magnetic parts tray is a life-saver when youre working on a project with a lot of screws or switching bits a lot. I keep it on the big workbench and we use it all the time!

See more specific organization trays and caddies here!

4. Plugs and chargers. EVERYWHERE.

Allow me to let you in on a little secret. It is impossible (I mean IMPOSSIBLE) to have too many plugs or chargers in your workshop.

It cant be done.

If you have corded tools, youll want plenty of room to plug them in. If you have battery-powered tools like we do, youll want aaaaaall of the battery charging stations. Which means outlets, outlets, and more outlets!

In our last house we only had two (TWO!) pairs of outlets in our garage and it was just a giant pain all the time. This garage is starting off with notably more than that I havent counted but I know its more than two and were also adding more via some really awesome power strips to make things as functional as possible.

This small workbench near the door is a great landing area for assembly, staining things, or just about anything else (I havent had a chance to use it yet so I dont know what Ill do for sure yet!) and we added this really fancy power strip above it to make it even better. In addition to adding some extra space to plug things in, it has a few USB ports so I can charge my phone (and even rest it on the little built-in phone ledge) so it doesnt die while I listen to my 12th consecutive crime-related podcast. Its also got two powerful lights that will be so helpful on the (near constant) occasion that were working out here long past the sun has gone down.

Long story short? You need extra outlets may as well also get a phone stand and some lights while youre at it, no?

Power strips

Heres the awesome power station we have we are loving it so far and cant recommend it enough!

Weve also used these shop lights in the past to add some extra light to dark corners they make a world of difference.

This cord reel is such a nice way to have a built-in extension cord that stays out of the way.

5. Make it cute.

And finally, perhaps the most important tip of all.

You think Im kidding, but Im so, so serious.

Im not sure if this is true for you, but I find Im about 95% more likely to keep a space looking organized and clean if I love how it looks. A junky garage will always be a junky garage and theres no point in really keeping it organized because its ugly already you cant make it worse!

Theres something magical that happens when I make a space look great that makes me so motivated to keep it looking great.

I have every intention of doing more projects like this on the other walls of my garage, but I kicked things off by adding this simple board and batten treatment to this back wall and painting it a color that makes me smile. It just took me a few hours over two days to install it and paint the whole thing, and now this entire space feels so much better. In fact, the whole garage feels better because of just this one side!

I also took the time to re-paint the metal cabinets we use under the smaller workbench, and I stained the workbench top and cut it down to fit better. Little touches like this look so great and make me feel so much better when Im in the space.

It sounds silly, but give it a shot I promise youll be surprised at how effective it is at motivating you to keep it clean!

If you want to see how this project unfolded, click here to watch my Instagram story highlights for the project!

I hope this post was helpful for you and Im so grateful for all of your excitement about this space. Your enthusiasm and encouragement made it way more tolerable to knock it out, and gets me pumped to get started on the next section!

Id love to hear your tips for organizing your workspace too anything amazing that I missed?!

The post Workshop Organization Ideas appeared first on Love & Renovations.

Agilenano - News from Agilenano from shopsnetwork (4 sites) https://agilenano.com/blogs/news/workshop-organization-ideas

[justinehudock]

eblows

mom didnt give me elbows when i was was in the bladder the culdesac or cratum or maybe they're all the same thing. whatever place where the place was tha her body cooked me up nice and joosy ripe, as the first peach of spring after long mastication in thick body syrup. i got a nose and eyes and a big loud mouth she says and kneecaps and hair in all the places you can name but no elbows. if it were a restaurant we were in mom would da been able to ask for less on the hair and more on the elbows but order customization is not a policy of this hospital. they get a lot of questions about that. but no elbows isnt all bad. no elbows made me slide out really smooth just like a bobsled and the nurse said to momma that was a good sign. he said youre a new mother and it may have took a bunch of months to let the dough rise but then only a few seconds to get it um him to come out. just like dough’s supposed to come out. bakeries dont have to wait at the oven while the loaf squeezes itself out for ten or 20 hours. or any of the other stuff. i loved no elbows in the canal. i slid past the finish line in the bask of huge white lights just like at an indoor event at the olympics. in a tunnel of glistening pink folds just like at the olympics. oh yeah baby i came out in seconds flat. grandma didnt even have time to turn on the camcorder. Mamas the real hero. she did those few months of keeping me inside her and with her elbows so you have to give extra points for that. but i guess if she grew me in a few seconds not having elbows might be the smallest of a problem you could have. the big problem would be that i would be way too small. not being a grown baby but just like i was a baby’s baby just like a russian nesting doll baby. and maybe then the nurse wouldnt have caught me on the way out because id been just zooming like a lubricated little pellet and the hospital would get sued by mom for not giving her someone good someone like carlton fisk of the the boston sox to catch me on the fly. i mean good god they had the debrilator right on the other side of the labor room. i might have gotten defribrolated. good thing that didnt happen. and also i mean too if it was me who took months to come out through labor and not the couple seconds it actually took i mean mommy probably would hate me no elbows or not. i mean you cant do anything but labor when youre in labor and boy shed have been bored plus i woldnt like that view very much not for that long. tunnels are bad enough and i dont like them and theyre not slimy pink and the odor probably isnt as bad but who knows. but none of that stuff happened & i just didnt have elbows. the hospital didnt have any to elbows to spare but they did try really to make some up. for a while i had bottle nipples slung to my arm bones for something elbow y so the other babies wouldnt look at my long chopstick arms longways but they didnt function in any way and anyway i kept trying to suckle (i was a baby then) them which didnt work because get this even if you dont have elbows you still cant lick that area no matter what it turns out. on my first birthday dad my papa who worked on the line of the car manufacturer brought me two small diodes which are the things that cover the blinker uh the car blinkers when youre making a turn or pull over or the hazards. we removed the nipples took em out and father brought them to the industrial waste dumping site who knows why but mommy did a quick job of breaking some stuff in me and opening skin of me and then putting the new elbows in mine arms. and they looked natural they really did look natural except when i had to bend them and then i looked like pinocchio. that son of the guido who lied and had a long nose or also like Barbie Made to MoveTM dolls for girls with the joints so actually altogether not so natural more like a doll or a wood thing. and another thing was they lit up when i lifted an arm like to signal i was making a move so my parents couldnt go to movie theaters that year they said because i was a distraction to the people around us. now im older and i can go to The Movies alone with no one to embaress but only to the really really bad reviewed movies so no ones there & gets hit by the popcorn im catapulting to my mouth with my loooooong arms. yea no i still dont have elbows but im getting really good at it.

[showingthroughtome]

4: june 10th

Rolling her eyes, she pushes the wispy bits of her hair out her face impatiently and sees his point. Though, she absolutely won't own up to it. “You're the one being annoying.”

“Hey now.” He moves to stand in front of her. “Don't blame this mood on me.”

He smiles widely at her even though she doesn't deserve it, even though she called him annoying for just being his teasing self. She exhales and wipes the first drop of sweat from her brow.

read below - story page - playlist - word count: 1259

The drive to Holiday World isn't terribly long, definitely no longer than when Jessica's family didn't have a car with air conditioning so every minute felt like an hour. She sat in the “way back” of their state of the art van, with Harry crammed in on one side of her and a cooler of soft drinks on the other. Her two younger sisters, aged thirteen and eleven, take up the normal back seats, headphones in and playing with Snapchat filters to pass the time.

Jessica thinks what really made the drive pass in warp speed was Harry, or rather, his ridiculous dancing to the entire Abba discography her mom wouldn't stop playing.

“Turn it up, Mrs. Scott!” He had even encouraged at one point, hooting to the dismay of her three children and devoted husband.

By the time they finally do get to stretch out of the cramped backseat, it's hard for Jessica to believe it had been a three hour drive. The first thing Harry does when he's out of the car is reach for her hand, pulling her, “Come on. While they unpack and get ready, we’ll grab a spot in line.”

So that's what they do - they stand in line for fifteen minutes, waiting for the rest of her family. They take a selfie themselves, posting it on Snapchat with the caption, holiday world, get ready for us and argue over which attraction to ride first. It takes some pushing but eventually Harry agrees that they can go on a small roller coaster to warm up, or really so Jessica can pluck up the courage to go on the bigger ones.

When her family joins them, they nod along as Jessica runs through the lineup of rides. The group is determined to visit every single one before they leave. Even her little sisters start to pay attention and look excited. But once they're actually in, and through with that first ride, they beg their parents to split up and go to a metal coaster with at least three loops.

Jessica feels nowhere near ready for that, so Harry gently shoos away her family and pretends to be doing her a great service by waiting in line with her for a slightly larger wooden coaster.  

“You could've gone with them if you really wanted to.” Jessica exhales after Harry makes the third joke about how childish the ride they were waiting on is. They've only been inside the park for thirty minutes at most and she's already getting annoyed with the lines. The heat isn't helping her mood as it beats down on her. Harry's bickering is icing on the cake of her frustration.

“Yeah right.” He snorts, unaffected by the ever growing crowd and relentless sun. “You would've been so pissed if I had left you.”

“I probably would’ve preferred it.”

Harry finds her out of the corner of his eyes, examining her short frame for a few seconds before, “Oh my god. Yeah! I forgot how miserable you are at theme parks.”

Rolling her eyes, she pushes the wispy bits of her hair out her face impatiently and sees his point. Though, she absolutely won't own up to it. “You're the one being annoying.”

“Hey now.” He moves to stand in front of her. “Don't blame this mood on me.”

He smiles widely at her even though she doesn't deserve it, even though she called him annoying for just being his teasing self. She exhales and wipes the first drop of sweat from her brow.

“You'll adjust to the heat and cheer up soon enough.” Harry does that thing again where he finds a loose piece of her hair that she hadn't even realized was annoying her and tucks it into her bun. “Happens every time we're here.”

“It's just so hot.” She mumbles, pouting up at him under her eyelashes. “Why did we have to come today?”

Harry's next move kind of takes her breath away, because instead of replying, he just begins waving his hands in her face, creating the most satisfying, desirable spurt of breeze that could be produced without an electric fan. It's then that she has no problem admitting that lately, nearly everything Harry does ends up with her feeling butterflies. Even when she thinks she'll be annoyed with him for hours like she used to get, she ends up picturing her face inches away from him in his basement, recalling the smell of mint on his breath, the taste -

“Better?” He asks once the frown lines on her forehead begin to relax.

“Um, yeah.” She blinks a few times to come down to earth, then grins, “But please don't ask me to return the favor, that'd be too much movement.”

“Would you even if I did?” He takes a step back with the flow of the line. There are only five people ahead of them now so they should be on by the next cycle.

By the look he's giving her, he already has an answer but still, she shrugs, “Maybe for a minute… until my arms got tired.”

“Literally sixty seconds then.”

“It's the thought that counts?” Jessica means it to be a statement yet somehow, it’s a question she's smiling out.

Harry nods, laughing along and then moving back to stand beside her, inches away. She glances over, admiring the way his white t-shirt pulls across his chest.

The car arrives again, letting off ten very giddy customers. Harry and Jessica pick a seat in the middle - the best spot in their personal opinion.

“Nervous?” He questions once they're already strapped in and the attendants are making the final safety checks.

Jessica tries to play it cool, staring down the tracks in the distance, raising one shoulder, in the most casual shrug she can muster. “Nah, I'm good.”

They have been friends for a decade though, so Harry doesn't fall for that at all.

“This one will be fine, I promise.” He throws a comforting arm around her and squeezes her shoulder. “Nowhere near the speed of the next one we’ll go on.”

Throwing her head back, she whines, “Please let me skip the really fast ones, Harry.”

“We will see.” He winks right when the attendant gets to them. Apparently, one tug of the metal bar is good enough to prove they won't fly out of the cart. Jessica squirms after the lack of security that provides her with. “This’ll be fun, shorty.”

She finally decides to look away from the tracks and instead focuses on his face. It gives her a degree of calm that she’s too afraid to admit. “You sure?”

He nods furiously while the attendant gets on the microphone and reads his speech about arms inside of vehicles and loose items put to the side. Next thing Jessica knows, before she could have stowed away her glasses if she hadn't already, the cart begins to hurtle forward, sending her reeling back.

Two minutes later, the ride is slowing and Jessica is coming down, her love of amusement parks slowly reignited and Harry's arm still thrown around her shoulders. The increasing joy could have been because the roller coaster was genuinely fun, but probably had more to do with Harry’s strong arm pulling her closer and allowing her to screech in his ears, out of 3 parts fear but mostly exhilaration. She knew it would be like this for any other rides they chose, making her willing to sit on even the fastest roller coaster in the park.

authors note:

hiii!! and we back and we back and we back and we back and we back na na na... this aint no intro, it’s the entree, hit that intro with kanye and sound like andre, trying to turn my baby mama to my fiance.... god that is such a jam. (all we got by chance the rapper, go listen. as a matter of fact, ill put it on the incredible playlist and link it above)

ANYWAY what i meant to say was that.....

and we’re back!! my internet is kind of horrible right now so it keeps disconnecting from my computer and being a pest but i keep figuring it out!!! i swear ill post another update of these guys soon! its getting exciting! at least to me! tell me if you think so too!!!

@what-comes-from-within edited this for me and turned it into something so here is to her!!! love ya girl! (jon snow isnt going to die this season. you better believe!)

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING!

[skrunglebeasts]

okay, so final fantasy 15 is still sticking with me, so im going to type up some words about it theres probably gonna be spoilers

keep in mind i went into this game with really low expectations. i fully expected to dislike it completely and i was pleasantly surprised to find i actually enjoyed the game enough to finish it all the way through. whats good in it is really, really good and that makes the bad bits that much more irritating to deal with

the world itself is probably one of the most engrossing things about it! its so rare for games to actually meld fantasy into a modern equivalent setting that manages to balance the two aspects in such a fun and interesting way i loved the open world parts and, honestly, if they ever just pulled a skyrim and made an open world game where you play a custom hunter, i would be all over that! i havent enjoyed a game world quite as much as i loved this one in a long time, even if the lens its viewed through is kind of not that great i still think the reasoning behind not including a female character in the party was skeevy (and is also directly contradicted twice in the game itself, so good job on that), the party honestly manages to be fun in most of their banter and its likely just having them around and seeing all the ways they interact with each other that makes the banter work so well. it really feels like youre in the country of lucis and like youre on something that is equal parts epic quest and roadtrip. there are also chocobos, which doesnt really have to do with anything, save for the fact that theyre loveable

and thats where all the strongest parts of final fatnasty 15 are! theyre all in lucis and the countryside you get to explore and dealing with their banter, but it all falls apart when the other parts of the game come into play. primarily the story

the story itself isnt bad as a concept, but the presentation needs so much work. plotholes sprout up almost as fast as side quests and the open world nature of the game doesnt lend well to any sort of urgency in the story telling. and i think the creators of the game realized that because once you set sail to altissia, shit goes south REALLY fast

now, this wouldnt be such a big deal and that sort of tonal dissonance isnt uncommon in video games. but theres usually events leading up to it! hints of something bigger or something terrible happening that will eventually be a problem you have to face directly. but when the death of a major side characters has nearly no emotional impact compared to a main character merely being injured (albeit permanently injured) something went wrong. lunafreya’s death is supposed to be this big deal that really hurts noctis, but none of that in-game hurt carries over at all. this is a video game. im supposed to feel something. but they completely and unironically fridge luna as development for noctis and all it left me with was a feeling that i wanted to skip the cutscenes where noctis bemoans his loss for a character who felt flat. and this happens TWICE. noctis dad dies on screen, but he does it to silenced footage from an apparent tie-in movie called kingsglaive or whatever. taking credit from a movie and putting it into the game is just sloppy.

in comparison, when ignis goes blind, that SUCKED. i knew, from having ignis around, that he relied on his eyesight for clarity in the world, that he felt it was his duty to provide perspective and guidance for noct. its a symbolic and physical loss and it has real impact. but it also happens off-screen and that takes away some of that blow. its the same with gladiolus and his scars. we know he has them and they arent stopping him. why do we have to wait for DLC for that? these are things that could have happened and SHOULD have happened during story missions and taken a while to have lasting impact. instread, all the big injuries and revelations are rushed as quickly as possible into the second half of the game, which i spent barely any time in, compared to the multiple hours i spent running around in lucis

and you can get back to running around in lucis in the form of a time traveling dog. or maybe its just reliving memories? its hard to say, but the game specifically puts in a mechanic that allows you to go back and play what is definitely the best part of the game because, not only do the rest of the story chapters not allow enough for you to do to properly level up for the end game, it also just isnt as interesting. the slough thats chapter 13 has gotten a lot of criticism, and rightly so, because its just so time consuming, mind numbing, and boring compared to being able to just hop into my flying car (which i unlocked) and take off for a ride when the party heads for altissia, i was expecting another territory like lucis! a huge, sprawling area, maybe about the size of one of the states/provinces/area in lucis that i could explore via car. i was expecting more roadtrip, more varied architecture and environments, but instead i got this small area that i was done with inside an hour before moving on to the next story mission and then it gets exploded

and that was just incredibly disappointing. it also set the bar from there. everything save for one or two set pieces (the fight with hydraean, the fight with ardyn at the end) and story moments (gentiana freezing ardyn was....pretty cool B) that and the reveal of the world of ruin really did leave me in awe) from the fall of altissia onward are neat in concept, but also disappointing in the sense that it feels like there should have been more, both while experiencing it and leading up to it. and for a ten year development time, there really should have. maybe they should have taken that budget they wasted on a movie and an anime and actually made the story feel complete

and the thing is, it didnt have to end up like this. the story progression could have felt natural if it ended up leading back to cape caem being where you wake up in the world of ruin and youre forced to make a trek back to the capital. gather your allies that youve made along the way, actually be a king, and lead everyone on a final assault on the capital to take down ardyn. or, at the very least, let us see iris, who is apparently now known as “The Daemon Slayer” what sort of badassness did this girl get up to that got her a nickname like that??

oh well. hopefully the fanbase does its thing and makes some fanfics where the story actually flows well. hell, maybe i should do that! be ready for my 15 chapter fanfic about umbra the dog saving the world