#this post will find its people

[bigfootsmom]

first time buck stays over at tommy’s place tommy takes his dentures out and gives buck the best sloppy toppy of his life

[ryuzatodraws-backup]

Count Primo, the panty sniffer

[somestardeww]

as a senior sterek shipper, everytime I see a post with a steddie tag I misread it as sterek and get excited a little- only to end up reading the post anyways cause I like steve and eddie, but you get my point

[azoosepted]

[ionegirl-art]

*sighs* Demons are back because it’s late at night and I’ve got no one to talk to.

I’m going to be open about something - may backfire but I feel it needs to be said because my heart is actively trying to kill me. If you don’t want to read below - Tis fine! It’s not everyone’s cup of tea - nor am I. And this is a LONG post, so if you make it to the end without saying “Deuces,” then you are absolutely amazing and thank you for reading my word vomit.

I remember NOW why I left social media - how hard it was to stop doing art on DeviantArt and how it felt like a part of me died when I left that social space to go to college. It’s because I relied on the positive feedback - the validation - to make me feel like I wasn’t some weirdo who had something wrong with her brain.

Turns out I do, by the way, and it’s called LOTS of mental illnesses (agoraphobia, social anxiety, panic disorder, general anxiety, and now high functioning autism in the works-oh boy!). And while I can sit here and say “my brain just processes things differently” and give myself grace… grace is not always easily received.

Anyway - social media. On one hand it is giving me the push I needed to start on my art again. Something I have seriously neglected since … well since high school. On the other hand, I wait with bated breath to see if I get a like or a comment or a repost to get that ‘high.’ Like I’m being seen for a change. Recognized. I’m being seen as someone other than a mom or a loner or the socially awkward person in the corner of a room. But social media is a double edged sword and I had forgotten that.

Then there is the fact that the only friends I have live at least 4 to 8 hours away from me and I don’t get to see them but maybe once a year. The only people I have to talk to is my husband, my sis on Destiny, and the people I work with (and unfortunately I have nothing in common with any of them except that we work at the same place.) I have no support group where I live and social media suddenly was appealing.

I want to make friends and talk to people who have similar interests, but I am constantly doing a mental check on myself on whether or not I’m socializing correctly. I laugh HEAVILY when I’m frustrated or nervous or scared. I despise awkward silence and small talk. And I don’t want to be annoying … or scare people away because let’s face it, I’ve done it. A lot. So I don’t always know if I should say “hi” or just be silent.

Social media is a double edged sword for me and I’m not sure if it’s an outlet I should really keep nearby. I enjoy the highs I get when people like my work, but the absolute pit fall afterward destroys me. It’s a matter of “look at all these people who like my work!” Followed immediately with the feeling of loneliness that I was NOT expecting.

Anyway… this post has become way too long and I doubt I have many of you who are still here.

Case in point - you don’t know how much your interactions make me happy and I’m just afraid to lose it all by doing something stupid.

Ugh - ugly tears. Back to my artwork now.

[ballowvalence]

When you're full of whimsy and cheer but you're a canned fish

[orangslices]

I think I finally understand the eroticism of the machine

Because I like her a lot

[amikufanlol]

Just got my first Miitopia follower.

This means I’ll be hyperfixated on it until the next Kirby game comes out, probably…or until I get another one of the older Kirby games (along with the console for it, probably)

Im so sorry, my Kirby followers. I promise I’ll be back some day. Don’t know when, though.

[traumallamarama]

my best friend @the-cloudy-wolf just tried to murder me (aka im sick and laughing throws me into a coughing fit)

me: i feel like i should change my lock screen... my background is yuri but my lock screen is just jupiter

cloud: you should make your lock screen yaoi then!

[monowritestoomuch]

Life is like a multiple choice question on a quiz, you can have several right answers, and several wrong answers, or both

[sleepy-bi666]

oh to be a child watching movies with the other kids at thanksgiving

( i miss my childhood y'all)

(techinally still a teen but it feels so long ago)

(it was almost always a christmas movie lmao or superbuddies)

[stemmmm]

more people gotta try this shit where bill has not improved and will not change but he's just chilling so its fine probably. its great

[cozylittleartblog]

cant tell you how bad it feels to constantly tell other artists to come to tumblr, because its the last good website that isn't fucked up by spoonfeeding algorithms and AI bullshit and isn't based around meaningless likes

just to watch that all fall apart in the last year or so and especially the last two weeks

there's nowhere good to go anymore for artists.

edit - a lot of people are saying the tags are important so actually, you'll look at my tags.

#please dont delete your accounts because of the AI crap. your art deserves more than being lost like that #if you have a good PC please glaze or nightshade it. if you dont or it doesnt work with your style (like mine) please start watermarking #use a plain-ish font. make it your username. if people can't google what your watermark says and find ur account its not a good watermark #it needs to be central in the image - NOT on the canvas edges - and put it in multiple places if you are compelled #please dont stop posting your art because of this shit. we just have to hope regulations will come slamming down on these shitheads#in the next year or two and you want to have accounts to come back to. the world Needs real art #if we all leave that just makes more room for these scam artists to fill in with their soulless recycled garbage #improvise adapt overcome. it sucks but it is what it is for the moment. safeguard yourself as best you can without making #years of art from thousands of artists lost media. the digital world and art is too temporary to hastily click a Delete button out of spite

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

genuinely is my brain erasing itself or is google/tumblr censoring that post about notre dame and old growth forests.

[rameiixo]

izutzoomie.. sorry

[aphel1on]

AURGH auwarghh the autistic parental trauma... the epi was wacky hijinks then dropped this on us out of nowhere... (sobs) laios... laiiiiooooos