#this photo is actually about 5 years old lmao

[skelekins]

(❤´艸｀❤) got the boys some onesies and then we got a mocha at the cafe

[leviathxn]

“Little Girl to Little Lady”

Dads best friend! Miguel x Younger! Fem! Reader

Warnings : Cock Warming, Age gap, oral, mentions of masturbation (and slight but very little), dirty talk? Breeding king (per usual lmao) and I forgot what else but it��s sex so

Summary : Miguel and you have always been close… but even closer now

It always annoyed me whenever people would say “you grew up so fast” or “I remember you when you were just a baby”. It was even worse when Miguel O’Hara, your dads best friend, would say it. He didn’t say it often, but when it was a late night of drinking with my father he would always say it to me, almost as if he was telling himself. Whenever he said it he sounded like he was trying to reason with himself rather than just making small talk or being an emotional drunk. It wasn’t like Miguel and I weren’t close either. In fact my dad had always left me at Miguel’s house to babysit when I was younger, no naturally I looked at him as an important older figure in my life.

Well actually I looked at him more than just a supportive adult. To say he wasn’t an attractive man was a total lie. He was gorgeous, body chiseled like a greed god. He was the reason I even got sex toys and explored my kinks. Because every night he would plague my mind as I got older.

He was 20 when I was born, was married and had his daughter, Gabriella at 25. His wife passed 5 years later when he was 30. It was heartbreaking to see him and Gabriella in such despair and pain. Me and my dad had visited more often. I had felt the pain as well, especially as a 10 year old. Dana was a mother figure to me ever since my mom had up and left after I was born. Naturally this led me to help take care of Gabriella and be a supportive woman in her life. She lost her mom and I didn’t want her to feel the  loneliness that I felt. I was (obviously) 5 years older than Gabriella so when I turned 15 I was able to babysit her alone when Miguel and my father had went out. I taught her about body and how she would be changing, helped her dress up and learn makeup. It was almost weekly that our parents would come home and find us cuddled together, sleeping with a movie on.

When I had turned 19 it was a little harder to visit Gabriella but I was always a text or phone call away if she ever needed me. My connection with her and Miguel was still very strong, as they came over for “family night” often. Obviously Miguel and my dad would drink while forgetting about whatever card or board game we were playing soon after. Gabriella started to get tired, it was around 10:30 as I put her to bed in my room. Whenever she fell asleep I would always share the bed with her. That’s what led me, Miguel and my dad to be downstairs, still drinking.

I didn’t drink really, Miguel and my dad knew this, never offering alcohol unless I specifically asked for it. I didn’t have a reason to drink, my social life never landing me at parties. When it came to relationships, I was hopeless. I was usually into older guys and besides a decent fuck, I didn’t see myself getting attached to them. At the end of the day, I always thought of Miguel when they were on top of me. It was shameful but most of the time the guys were too horny to even realize I wasn’t moaning their name.

I sat next to Miguel on the big couch as my dad sat in the arm chair to our right. He smiled as he listened to my dad, looking over at me. That’s when I heard the usual.

“Seeing you take care of my little Gabriella reminds me of when you were younger. You’re much more grown now though. A little Lady instead of a little girl”. I laughed as my dad finished his drink.

“Well Miguel? Let’s look at some baby photos!” My laugh abruptly stopped as my face flushed. I always objected, saying that Miguel has seen me as a kid so many times already, that he didn’t need to see anymore or be reminded. They always laughed me off as my dad took out the book.

“Even if I took care of you then, it’s nice to be reminded. I may still see you as a kid but the pictures remind me of how much you’ve grown”. There was that tone again. The one where he sounded like he was fighting himself to reason. But to reason over what? That I was a growing into a woman? Or that he thought I still acted like a kid? I grumbled as Miguel finished his beer and flipped through the photos with my dad. Even though I objected at first, it was nice laughing all together about my funny photos. As the night went on, my father slowly fell asleep on the couch, a smile on his face. I shook him awake, helping him to bed. As I came back down I saw Miguel still flipping through the book. I sat next to him again, looking over his shoulder.

Then there was a photo oh Miguel, feeding me cake as I sat in his lap. We both looked so young. I was probably around 6 in the photo, his frame still much larger than mine. He sighed, sliding his thumb over his bottom lip. I looked at him, as he looked at the photo for a good few minutes.

“Uhm.. Miguel is everything okay?” He glanced over to me, face flushed. I had never seen him look that way. He put his bottle down, next to the many other bottles…. I knew Miguel could drink but when did he finish so many? While we were looking at the photos? Miguel definitely wasn’t drunk but he was positively tipsy. He put his hand on my thigh, running it up and down my leg. I shuddered at his touch. “Miguel?”

“I would kill to have you in my lap like that again”. He said unwavering. I felt the heat rush to my face as he said it, I looked away and shifted awkwardly.

“M-Miguel where is this coming from?” He chuckled and stopped his hand at my upper thigh.

“The only reason I’m able to say this is because of what I heard you doing to yourself last night”. My face drained. He saw that? How much did he see? I was face down, ass up with a vibrator, is he talking about that? Or is he pulling my strings? Did he hear me moan his name?

“What are you talking about? I was in my room reading.” I said, my voice wavering. I wanted to seem convincing, I really did but I was so nervous under his gaze.

“Were you? That’s not what it sounded like… or what it looked like.” He shifted onto the ground, moving in between my legs. His arms on either side of me, trapping me on the couch. I couldn’t move. I was so nervous as my body trembled. “Did you imagine me eating you out? Or maybe you imagined me fucking you, hm? You were so loud.. just for me”. He kissed my legs, slowly inching towards my inner thigh. I slightly opened my legs on instinct. He chuckled and didn’t move any closer. “Use your words querida.” He said firmly as I shook my head. This was too embarrassing for me. Even being below me he had so much control over me. He shrugged his shoulders and began to get up. I panicked and grabbed his shoulders.

“P-please don’t leave…”. I pleaded. No matter how embarrassed I was, I have been wanting this for so long, so painstakingly long. He licked his lips as he got on his knees in front of me again. Kissing my thighs again. “I thought about you… uhm well I thought about you eating me out” I choked out. He already knew that I thought about him, no point in hiding it. He smirked into the kisses and slid his fingers to the hem of my shorts. He unbuttoned and unzipped them slowly. Miguel looked at me for conformation and I nodded my head. He pulled them down and off my body, leaving me in a shirt and panties. He brought his fingers to my clothed pussy, feeling the drenched fabric.

“Ahh so wet already. Were you thinking about me today?”. I nodded my head as he looked up at me. “Why? Tell me what made you think about me”. I felt embarrassed again, hoping he wouldn’t be mad about the answer.

“When I was putting Gabriella to bed I thought about having a family with you… a-and what it would feel like to have you put a baby in me”. His laugh was deep as he put his hands on my lower back and pulled me closer to him. His lips hovered over my panties, kissing my heat through the cloth. I twitched from the contact

“Oh my… you’ve got more of an imagination that I thought. Would you want to be a mother? Have my babies inside you?” I nodded my head again and he snarled. “Words cariño.” His tone was stern, not making things easy for me

“Yes, Miguel”. He nodded his head in approval before sliding my panties down and blowing over my heat. I yelped as the sensation, his breath was hot, and it made my body shudder. “Miguel please~”.

“Please what?” He asked teasingly as he inched even closer.

“Please eat me out”. He chuckled and latched his lips on my pussy. He took no time sliding his tongue in. He lapped at my juices as I threw my head back, gripping onto the couch. I whimpered while biting on my lip. I didn’t want Gabriella or my dad to wake up. He moved his hands to my thighs as he prevented them from clamping on his head as he continued to eat me out. His tongue did wonders and he moaned into me, letting the vibration of his moan toy with me. He spread my thighs further apart, allowing him to go deeper with his tongue. I didn’t think it was possible but the sliding of his tongue left me shaking. I wanted to squeeze my legs around him so bad, I wanted him to stay right there.

“Miguel more please~” I whispered, I was so scared to release a moan that I squeaked out the words. I was surprised he even heard me as his hands moved to my ass, allowing me to close my legs. I felt the knot from in my stomach as he continue to tongue fuck me. My legs squeezed around his head as I came in his mouth. He lapped up all of it, licking his lips. I panted as he chuckled and wiped his cheeks. He played with my juices on his fingers, putting them up to my mouth and making me taste myself.

“Was that good? I don’t think any guy your age could do as good as me”. He stated proudly as I nodded my head, still dazed from the sensation.

“I’ve only ever fucked older guys… but no guy has ever done that for me in the first place”. He scoffed

“Really? So un-classy… good thing I’m taking care of you from now on hm?” I giggled at his response. He was really getting an ego boost from this. He moved me from the couch and brought me upstairs to the guest bedroom.

Him and Gabriella were over so often that it was pretty much his. The only problem was that it was right nexts to my dads, and the walls weren’t exactly thick either. I reminded myself to stay quiet so we wouldn’t wake him. “Rest for a few minutes. Im gonna clean up downstairs and then I’ll come back up and give you what you really want”. I nodded my head, feeling my pussy throb and clench on nothing. He walked out of the room, my body trembling thinking about him. I wonder how big he is…. I mean I’m already much smaller than him so he would probably stretch me out.

I let my fingers slid down to my pussy, gliding over it. I let out a breath as I slid my fingers in, toying with my walls. I bit my lip again as I finger fucked myself to the thought of Miguel. He was amazing with his tongue but his dick would be 100x better. Hitting every spot, reaching deeper and deeper… then coating my walls with his seed-

My wrist was grabbed and my fingers were pulled out. I gasped at the sudden emptiness as I saw Miguel over me, licking my fingers. I stared up at him, watching him clean off my digits. He cleaned up that fast? Or was I imagining him for that long?

“Really? You couldn’t wait 5 minutes?” I looked away embarrassed. He chuckled pushing me flat on my back. He took his jeans off and tossed them across the room. He slid his boxers down just enough. Miguel stood at the edge of the bed and pulled me towards him. I yelled as I felt my pussy press against his cock. He finally lifted up my shirt, unclasping my bra. “God you look perfect”. He stared at my flushed face, hair sticking out everywhere with lustful eyes. My nipples hardened at the cold air, perking up. He left one hand on my waist for support, the other hand lining himself up. I wrapped my legs around him as he lined himself up with me. I gulped. The most I’ve taken in is 5 inches, Miguel was at least 8 and his girth…. He pushed his tip in and I gasped.

He continued to push himself into me, my pussy stretching more and more. Tears brimmed in the corner of my eyes. He cusped my cheek and wiped the tears. “You’re almost there querida, breathe”. He got half way before my pussy clenched again. He grunted before putting both hands on my waist. He rubbed circles, trying to help me relax. “Mi amor please you have to relax or else I can’t fuck you”. The words ‘mi amor’ rung throughout my head. My body relaxed as I thought about it. I didn’t know Spanish but I knew that much. My face heat up as I brought my hands to my face. Mi amor? Would he call me that even if we weren’t fucking? Did he like me? I mean I liked him, hell I loved him. Did I love him or did I just want him to fuck me?

I was snapped out of my thoughts when I felt his push the rest of himself inside of me, I moaned out loud before quickly covering my mouth. I wasn’t ready for it as he bottomed out. He chuckled as he brought his lips close to mine.

“What got you so distracted? It’s almost like you forgot that my dick was in you”. I blushed as he stayed in place, me basically just cock warming as he spoke.

“I- uhm…. You called me ‘mi amor’ and I started thinking”. I trailed off, looking away. I didn’t want to move or else I would moan again. His eyes widened at my reaction.

“(Y/N) look at me”. I hesitated. “Look at me now.” I turned my head and met his eyes. Before could explain myself he kissed my lips. But it was warm… so warm and loving. I kissed back, wanting to feel more of his passion. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him in deeper. As our kiss deepened he began to rock his hips into me. I moaned into his mouth, letting him slide his tongue in. He took immediate control and continued to fuck me.

He bottomed out quickly, beginning to pound into me. “Listen to me (Y/N), wether I had you in bed or not I love you”. I nodded my head and whimpered as he continue to fuck me. He moved his hands to my breast, latching onto my left one with his mouth and playing and twisting my right nipple. I tried so damn hard to stay quiet as his balls slapped against my ass. If I spoke now I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from making noise. “Say it mi amor”.

“I- I love you too Miguel-mphm!” He shoved his fingers into my mouth, moving his to leave hickies from my shoulders to the valley of my chest. His tip hit every spot, I felt every vein on his girth as he continued to pounded into me.

“Yeah? So that means I can put my babies in you? Fill you up with my cum all night? You would want that wouldn’t you. For me to use you as a cum dump”. A ray of yesses left my mouth, said so drunkenly. I was so dazed from his cock I couldn’t think straight. The drool started to pour out of my mouth as he pressed himself deeper and deeper. He has so much stamina. He grunted as he watched my tits bounce. “Don’t be too loud… your dad might wake up”.

Miguel put his hands on my waist, wanting to let my boobs bounce on their own. Lewd noises filled the room as I saw stars, eyes rolling back from the pleasure. He staggered, my pussy clenching on every bit of him. A knot formed in my stomach as I continued to pant and whimper. It took every ounce of will power not to break and scream out his name.

I felt the knot burst as I came, a moan escaping my lips. A few more stores and Miguel coated my walls. I felt the heat fill me up to the brim. He hovered over me before pulling his cock out. He watched as our mixed cum began to spill out of me. Miguel pressed his thumb to my hole, keeping in as much as he could.

“Don’t want any of it to go to waste right? Or else we’ll have to do this again”. He was met with silence. Well besides my pants as I stared up at the ceiling with half lidded eyes and drool still lining down my cheek. He stared at my fucked out appearance and admired his work. He went into the bathroom (connected to the guest room) and grabbed a towel. He cleaned us both up before putting on a pair of boxers. He ventured to my room as he grabbed me a pair of panties. He looked over to Gabriella, sleeping soundly. He smiled and kissed her forehead thinking about how good of a mom I would actually be.

Coming back to the guest room he saw me sitting up, cleaning up my face and hair. We smiled at each other as he helped me put the underwear on. He gave me one of his shirts as it would fit like a dress. Although the sheets were slightly stained, that was something he would worry about another time. He debated his options. He could sleep and cuddle with me and run the risk of my dad seeing us or he could send me upstairs to Gabriella. As safe as it sounded he decided to keep me with him, wanting to be with the woman he just talked about having a baby with. It’s the least he could do after he just fucked you like that.

He pulled me close and laid down with me, spooning me from behind. I used his arm as a pillow, his other hand resting on my stomach. I smiled as I closed my eyes, painfully tired after our “little stunt”. He watched me fall asleep before kissing my head and closing his eyes as well.

OKAYYY SO IVE BEEN WRITING THIS FOR A FEW HOURS NOW AND IF YOU GUYS WANT A PART 2 OF LIKE THE AFTERMATH THEN JUST LMK! I HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOYED

If I do write a part two should I make the dad find out and have angst or basically keep it hidden until the reader is old enough to live on her own

PART 2 IS UP AND ITS FLUFF - I don’t know how to link it so bear with me please and just find it, it’s “Little Lady to Little Wife”

[gunsatthaphan]

~ Monthly BL Breakdown: February 2024 ~ 

🌱 Happy March!!! 🌷

Disclaimer: ALL shows can be streamed here or here, as well as on Youtube and other platforms. For more info on where to watch what, check out this post! 

New breakdowns are coming at the end of every month - feel free to add stuff! -> previous breakdowns

What came out this month? (green = seen/currently watching)

🌟 Anti Reset - February 2nd (Taiwan)

🌟 Love Syndrome: The Beginning - February 8th (Thailand)

🌟 Baka Pwede pa? - February 9th (Philippines)

🌟 War of Y: The Reunion (special episode) - February 10th (Thailand)

🌟 1000 Years Old - February 14th (Thailand)

🌟 My Strawberry Film - February 16th (Japan)

🌟 A Secret Love - February 17th (Thailand)

🌟 To Be Continued - February 19th (Thailand)

🌟 Unknown - February 24th (Taiwan)

🌟 Wedding Impossible - February 26th (South Korea)

🌟 Kiseki Chapter 1 & Chapter 2 - February TBA (Thailand)

🌟 Ambiguous - February TBA (South Korea)

Monthly likes/dislikes

❣️ I'm gonna have to list Cherry Magic and Cooking Crush again just because they filled me with so much serotonin lol. Truly beautiful productions, so carefully written, so well executed and with so much wholesomeness and so many green flags lol. I had the best time watching them and the fact that 2 OG pairs had comeback shows back to back gave me so much nostalgia lol, especially since the genre is reminiscent of their old shows. It's been a blissful and therapeutic few months and I'm extremely sad that it's over 😩🥺🫶🏻 A+ content from everyone involved. 12/10 for both.

👎🏻 It has been a year lmao a lot of things happened this month, the Pawin situation makes me sad, we don't know what actually happened but the whole thing is messed up either way. James dropping out of LUAT came as a surprise as well, I'm not a NetJames fan but if they really had a falling out like the rumors say then that's sad. Singto coming back to gmm has been a nice surprise amongst the scandals lol but other than that I hope things go uphill after this 🥺

New series & movie announcements

🎥 My Bias is Showing (manwha adaption) - Date TBA (South Korea)

🎥 All About Lust - Date TBA (South Korea)

🎥 A Balloon's Landing - Date TBA (Taiwan)

🎥 Roommates - Date TBA (South Korea)

🎥 Good Night to Get Drunk - Date TBA (South Korea)

🎥 First Note of Love - Date TBA (Taiwan)

🎥 Living With Him - Coming April 11th (Japan)

🎥 The Young Gangster - Coming 2025 (Taiwan)

Other news from the BL world

❗️ Actor Singto Prachaya has returned to GMMTV as an artist. He previously left the company in 2021 to work as a freelance actor & producer after being under contract for nearly 5 years. It is unknown whether he will be part of any projects of the 2024 lineup.

❗️ The Thai BL Playboyy is getting a second season.

❗️ The upcoming Korean series High School Return of a Gangster announced the removal of the original BL plot. The show will air as a censored version, focusing on the friendship between the male leads.

❗️ Actors Charles Tu (HIStory 4) and Michael Chang (My Tooth Your Love) were confirmed to star in the upcoming BL First Note of Love. The series tells the story of a musician who is struggling with stage fright and one of his fans. An air date has not been announced.

❗️ Actor Non Ratchanon will no longer partake in the upcoming BL Live in Love. In an official statement, the production company stated that the decision was made due to disagreements between his agency and the one representing his co-star Hearth Chindanai. A recast for his role has yet to be announced.

❗️ GMMTV actor Win Pawin was accused of physically assaulting his ex-girlfriend, who made public allegations with photo evidence of her wounds. As a result GMMTV released a statement announcing the suspension of Pawin from all further work activities until legal investigations are complete. This lead to him making a public statement saying he is withdrawing from the upcoming BL We Are. He was cast as one of the 8 protagonists and was paired with his former partner Marc Pahun. GMMTV released a followup statement today, announcing Pawin's character would be recast to newbie Poon Mitpakdee.

❗️ Actor James Supamongkon announced his withdrawal from the upcoming Domundi BL Love Upon a Time. He released a statement on Twitter, saying he wants to expand his career and focus on other projects as an artist apart from acting. The company stated that Net and the others will stay part of the cast and that a new partner for Net will be cast shortly. This caused a big uproar amongst the fans who have been waiting for the series since it was announced over a year ago. Whether James' dropping out has anything to do with a dispute between him and Net is not confirmed.

Upcoming series & movies for March

👉🏻 Love is Better the Second Time Around - March 5th (Japan)

👉🏻 Deep Night - March 7th (Thailand)

👉🏻 Two Worlds - March 21st (Thailand)

👉🏻 High Demand - March 23rd (Thailand)

👉🏻 Wuju Bakery - March TBA (Thailand)

👉🏻 The Star - Date TBA (Thailand)

👉🏻 Blossom Campus - March TBA (South Korea)

👉🏻 Jazz for Two - March TBA (South Korea)

[vacantgodling]

a guide to: amon

we're back with another one. special shout out to annika for giving me the DRIVE to finish this lmao

transposed under the cut!

SLIDE 1: A GUIDE TO: AMON -- a man with literally no fucking chill. another monstrosity by yours truly @vacantgodling

SLIDE 2: BASIC INFORMATION pt. 1

FULL NAME: AMON

in GALERE those who are not of nobility literally do not have surnames. they’re not considered important enough to have them.

ie: erecia, terian, asahel, tamhas, vira, miss. shanin, knox, etc. none of these characters have surnames

HOWEVER, amon has a secret identity — or could’ve had one, its complicated — that many of these non-noble characters don’t know about: 

OCCASIONALLY KNOWN AS: CORIANDRUM FARRAH

after amon was attacked by the gang THE KEYS and his mother was killed, he was found and saved by a noble family: lord and lady farrah. unable to have children themselves, the two wanted to adopt the young boy, despite his many scars from the attack, to serve as their heir.

there are 2 alternate universe aus where amon does stay with the farrah’s and becomes their heir ⟶ the role swap au & the fiance au.

however, in canon, amon runs away from them after he heals at about 12 years old and returns to the slums of halifax, which are his home.

SLIDE 3: BASIC INFORMATION PT. 2

AGE: 29

BIRTHDAY: JANUARY 29TH

GENDER: CIS MAN

SEXUALITY: GAY. EXTREMELY KINKY. WE WILL GET TO THIS LATER.

OCCUPATION: MANSERVANT AT THE CHATEAU AUX AISLES D’OR

however, amon is also a member of the slum-gang THE LOCKS, who are in direct opposition to THE KEYS. THE LOCKS are run underneath the leadership of knox, a man who is also amon’s father figure.

despite their closeness, the two still butt heads.

knox wants to focus lock efforts on keeping the slums safe for everyone who lives there. however, amon knows that they will never be safe if the keys continue to stalk their streets at night. he wants to cut the head off of the proverbial snake—and take out their leader once and for all!

the only problem? well. 

the leader of the keys is THE KEEPER.

SLIDE 4: KINKY DETOUR✨PLEASE IGNORE IF Y’AIN’T LIKE SEX✨

a non-exhaustive list of amon’s kinks

impact play (actual fisticuffs turn him on), being restrained, orgasm play in any capacity, breath play (he has a huge oral fixation & choking on dick is his favorite pastime), cock worship/rimming, rough sex to the point of dubcon, anything “primal” (ie: wrestling, biting, scratching, growling, etc), blood play, degradation/humiliation—he is a BRAT, skin sensation or temperature play (such as ice/wax), exhibitionism/voyeurism… and he’s generally experimental. you get the picture. 

the man is insatiable.

SLIDE 5: GENERAL APPEARANCE:

HEIGHT: 6’2” (~187cm)

EYE COLOR: light brown; almost hazel

HAIR: dark black; short and choppy. his hair is actually naturally curly but he straightens it to appear more “dignified” as part of his act. 

BUILD: tall and lean; upside down triangle lookin’ ass. he doesn’t find himself particularly handsome.

there are 2 photos of amon to display how he looks. the first is a close up shot of amon--he has short cropped hair in a messy style, and sweeps on the left side over his brow bone. he has a few pinkish colored scars that criss cross his neck and he is making a smarmy expression. the second photo is a full body (sans feet) shot of amon bloodied and covered in bandages. the scars are revealed to cover most of his upper torso and one of his eyes is blackened.

SLIDE 6: SCARS

as a child, amon and his mother were attacked by keys; leaving him both an orphan and on the brink of death. miraculously (and with medical intervention) amon survived, but the attack left a mark on him—mentally and physically. 

to this day, amon hasn’t said what exactly the keys did to him to leave such marks. but nearly every available surface of his skin, including his genitals has some form of scarring. the worst scars are on his back. 

he is somewhat self conscious about them only because people can become uncomfortable about them. 

there is a photo of the backside of amon that showcases the scars on his back. the largest is one at the near center that goes from the top of his shoulder blades crossing diagonally down to his tailbone.

SLIDE 7: IMPORTANT RELATIONSHIPS

KNOX ⟶ as mentioned, knox is like a father figure to amon and he was the one who took him in once he returned to the slums after the brief period he lived with the farrah’s. while knox is wise and caring, he is critical of amon’s fight now, questions later approach, and tends to reproach him for causing ‘unnecessary drama’. despite this, he knows amon has the slums and the gang’s best interest at heart, and the two of them never stay mad at each other for long. knox is also willing to help in SOME of amon’s exploits (not all)

ERECIA ⟶ amon’s best friend and right hand man, the two have known each other since they were extremely small, and rekindled their friendship after they both experienced personal tragedy (erecia lost her father, and amon lost his mother/almost died/left the slums/came back). while amon is more verbally affectionate and likes to deflect his inner mind, erecia is someone who (to his chagrin) knows him very, very well. to the point that she is genuinely surprised at how enraptured amon has become with hya. she worries about him.

SLIDE 8: EXPLAINING THE OBSESSION WITH HYACINTHUS SHRAPNEL

this is extremely difficult to explain because in a number of ways, amon doesn’t really understand it either. he didn’t think much of hya at first; and at first, definitely only saw him as a means (the wife of the keeper) to an end (killing the keeper).

its the perfect storm of fucking around and finding out—not that i can blame him. he’s fucked hundreds of people without catching feelings; why should a pompous little lord be different? 

it’s more than just the fact that he can get a rise out of hya as amon can get a rise out of most people if he tries hard enough. it’s more than the fact that he thinks hya is attractive (and he does, immensely so) — somehow, hya is the perfect storm of a stubborn ass prick that fires all of amon’s dog-like synapses. 

he’s extremely lucky that hya feels the same about him tbh, even if its unsaid. idk. they’re made for each other.

SLIDE 9: ASSOCIATIONS

alcoholic drink: fireball shot

food: opera cake (or any sweet really)

colors: black & red

flower: coriander

animal: vulture

zodiac: aquarius

tarot: king of wands

song: king for a day — pierce the veil

[blood-mocha-latte]

so i made a quiz a minute back and there was a question about my guinea pigs and a lot of people. followed up on that and wanted to know more lmao. AND if you've been here for even .5 seconds you are aware that i. love talking about my pets so let's get into it

i. Perdita Sue

name: -- perdita for 101 Dalmations (since she's black and white) -- sue for Sue Hendrickson (a world renowned paleontologist)

fun fact: as stated by the quiz she fucking. loves her water bottle. when she was a baby we were worried she had a blockage in her throat because she kept slamming it back against the wall of the hutch REALLY LOUDLY and her sister didn't do that. so we took her to the vet. nothings wrong. maybe it was just a thing when she was a baby no. no she just really fucking loves her water bottle and likes making it really loud

worst experience: she cut her paw open on a piece of hay when she was about a year and a half old and was bleeding SO FUCKING MUCH i almost missed a class final to stay home with her. she was fine lol

best experience: she likes to shake hands. i have a photo of this somewhere. if you put your hand down in the hutch she'll run over and put both her paws in your palm so you can "shake" them it's the funniest fucking thing

ii. Mei Rosalind

name: -- mei for my fiancee's middle name lmao (lenora-mei) -- rosalind for Rosalind Franklin (biochemist who discovered the structure of dna)

fun fact: again as in the quiz, she likes sunbeams. a whole fuckin' lot. like, too much. it was about noon and i walked into the room they're in and she was on her back. lil paws in the air. and i thought she was Fucking Dead but no. she was just sunbathing

worst experience: she once sneezed in my mouth and i thought i was gonna die

best experience: when i was studying for my organic chem final she slept on my desk the whole time and just generally kept me from Flipping The Desk and giving up lmao

iii. Meg Helen

name: -- meg for meg jay (clinical psychologist on adult development) -- helen for. helen keller. bc she's blind

fun fact: the only guinea pig we got from a pet store, who we weren't actually going to get. but she was curled up in the corner of a too small cage and was obviously miserable, so we ended up biting the bullet and adopting her. took her to the vet, vet told us she is The Most Blind Animal she has ever had the pleasure of meeting. take that as you will

worst experience: we got her when she was just a little over a week old and she had to be quarantined from the others. we ended up having to switch off and sit with her at night because she'd cry the whole time and she has the saddest fucking wheek

best experience: she has the croakiest voice of all time. we're pretty sure it's the same genetic inbreeding problems that made her blind, but it doesn't hurt her and it sounds Hilarious. when she finally got out of her quarantine hutch and to her real one (which is 45 feet squared lmao) she didn't stop popcorning and squeaking for fifteen minutes. i cried my fiancee cried i took a video and sent it to my parents and they cried it was a day

iv. Piper Florence

name: -- piper for the pied piper of war because she's the leader and the others follow after her like she's the. the pied piper -- florence for florence nightingale because again if you've been here for more than .5 seconds you know that i am a. healthcare bitch

fun fact: once jumped out of the hutch and then just stood in the middle of the room because she didn't know where to go. is Best Friends with meg and shows her where everything is in the hutch when we have to change it/replace objects. she does not like sue and ignores her. just doesn't like her there's nothing to be done

worst experience: we thought she had ovarian cancer about a year ago because she was lethargic/sick/swollen etc for a long period of time. tracking her poop what she ate all of that etc etc. turns out that she had a cyst which was still a fucking nightmare, but hey at least it wasn't cancer

best experience: when my fiancée got really sick a few years back piper would just sit on her chest and purr. it was cute and needed and she's fuckin BEEN there man she's basically our dog

anyways that's it. congratulations if you got through it all lmao. i also have four cats (i am. not good at fostering) and a dog so maybe i'll make a post about them idk. ok bye

[artinandwritin]

December 28th, 2024 marked five (5!!!) years since I created my beloved baby girl Siri!! And man. Manmanmanman. Yeah.

That's a little bit insane.

So first off, yippee, and second off, i got nostalgic and decided to dig up some of the first art i did of my baby back in december 2019. So now yall get to suffer as i show my old art >:)

First off, my first Siri drawing ever!! She used to look a whole lot different and had a different birthday (and yes her hair was already blonde i just. Didnt have a great blonde marker at 16 lmao)

In january 2020 gussiri became a thing because i thought their personalities would fit together. Oh jolly. What a good thing for all of us (i cant escape them)

Early 2020 digital siri art... save me early 2020 digital siri art... (oh and also gussiri who. Still have this STUPID fucking dynamic. I love them so much)

This is when people realised Siri was in fact. Blonde (lmao) (also i got dared to draw these two singing high school musical)

This is where i learned how to draw chins (surprisingly hard task i do not recommand) and baby girl got a new outfit!!!! Byebye sad greys hello pastels (i actually still really like this outfit on Siri tbh)

She went through so. So manu outfits. And i think i had entered art school by the time i drew this??? So i mustve drawn this in 2022

And!!! Now we're here (with some missed steps inbetween cuz tumblr. Only allows me to post 10 photos >:( )

And yknow i think its pretty fun this lil character has stuck with me throughout the last five years!! Shes really seen me through high school and college and hardships alike and has grown with me as my artskills and writing got better

I love Siri and everything she stands for to me, as her creator, so much, like,,, the idea that i have this character that grew up beside me and developed herself the more i drew her and the more i noted down about her is actually so insane

I dunno if i should thank a character for existing, but if theres any character id like to thank it would be this gal. For being a constant and a developing concept at the same time <333

[gtliveoutofcontext]

@theoryandahalf I hope you don’t mind the tag, wasn’t sure if you would rather me reply telling you I posted it to dm you or what so I just assumed this would be the best option. Sorry!

Anyway, I have the 5/7 GTLive backgrounds under the cut and the years they were used for :)

Edit: I noticed after I posted this while looking at their very first episodes that the first bg was actually a created in October 2015, not 2016. TikTok crying emoji

The first background, it was used from 2015-2017. OG Peepachu was already around in this era, but I think he’s not in this photo lolz

The second background from 2017-2018, drama llama was brought in around this era!

The third background. ‘Twas very plain. This background was 2018-2020!

Peepachu left during the yellow wallpaper, but I’m not sure if it was this or the decoration change. This was from 2020-2021 and was Stephanie’s last one :( Mirror Matt started with this one, I’m pretty sure (didn’t check, just going off of memory)

Yellow bg 2.0! Obv old Peepachu was gone by now considering gigachu is there lmao. Steph was gone by this point, and it was 2021-2023. Ash started with this bg, and it 99% sure mirror Matt left with this one but feel free to correct me!

2023-2024! Not much to say about this other than the gap™️

And finally, the latest one! Very full but not distracting background! Glad to see anxiety bread back in this next to the iconic plant and drama llama, and the coat. Obv, 2024 onwards!

WAIG IM JUST REALISING FID THEY GET RID OF GTLIVE GTLAUGH GTLOVE???? DUDE WHATTTTT NO :(

Anywho, hope this helps! Some of the screenshots are absolute mugs… oh well. This is SO pixelated and the quality is fine in my camera roll. Tumblr😡

[tarasmithshifts]

𝐅𝐀𝐌𝐄 𝐃𝐑 𝐔𝐏𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐄: 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐃 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐅𝐓

𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄 𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐈𝐍 𝐃𝐑. 4.5 months 𝐀𝐆𝐄. 26-27 𝐌𝐀𝐈𝐍 𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃 𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐏: timothee chalamet, jenna ortega, billie eilish, amybeth mcnulty 𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄 𝐓𝐎 𝐌𝐘 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓: pedro pascal, oscar isaac, emma watson, natalie portman, scarlett johansson etc.

𝐑𝐄𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐏 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐒. single :(

ＡＰＲＩＬ

well, there was a lot of going on in april :)

first: MY BIRTHDAYYYY i threw the whole party and invited the half of hollywood lmao. There was a lot of my co-stars, artists and singers. I did it like there was no tomorrow, the party was crazy, basically everyone got drunk and sang 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY' like 5 times BUT IT WAS SO COOL UGHHHHH i love them all so so so fucking much. I caan't take it anymore.

I threw the party back in LA, where i was living since my hollywood debut in Ad Astra, but i was planning on moving into NYC fro like a year. SO I DID IT HAHAHAHAHHH it's so cool and i was so excited, but we will move to it later :))

What also happened: PEDRO'S BIRTHDAYYYYY my favourite (okay, he is not the only one BUT STILL) babygirl on earth turned 48 and he invited me to his party which was so COOL!!! idk how will i move on from this, i met BELLA RAMSEY (FINALLY???!?!?!? UGHHH) and met oscar isaac again (for those who don't know, he's my future s/o but it's a long slowburn lmao ✦ he was also my co-star in moon knight, but we knew each other for like a year before this series) after party he took me out to the city, we were talking and walking around LA for HOURS it was so cute he even bought me a rose literally when florist's wanted to close the shop, then we found out paparazzi took a pictures of us there 💀 they are so annoying i swear. but anyway, i had amazing night and oscar made it even better :')

Emma also had her birthday, but i couldn't show up, because of filming 'joker II' with JOAQUIN FUCKING PHEONIX I STILL CANNOT BELIEVE IT. But i sent her birtday present, which was the whole album of photos that i took on my digital camera on our summer & winter holidays - which i thought was super cute :')

April was super productive in a birthday-way as you can see, lmao

But also other super thing happened! Warner Bros. accepted my movie idea and hired me as a director of it. I'M SUPPER EXCITED TO BRING IT TO LIFE UGHHH

ＭＡＹ

talking, talking & talking about my movie and me as a director - which was super stressfull for me but everything turned out okay! I started writing the script at the end of april, so until i will write it and it gets accepted by Warner Bros. it will take a while for me to cast people :(( but still so excited for it!

and... MY DREAM ABOUT MOVING TO NYC FINALLY CAME TRUE!!!

i bought cute little flat in Manhattan, and started to plan how to move there with all my things. but you know, i didn't sell my old house - no no no. i would never do that, actually. It's the best house in the whole world duhh🙄. I will be still using it!

My friends helped me a lot with planning the whole 'mission' lmao. Shout-out to pedro he told me to move to NYC and live with rats under brooklyn bridge LOL

ANYWAYYY oscar & i met for some coffee instead of actually putting my things into huge boxes for my flat in NYC which was super cute BUT I CAN'T STAND THAT I SCRPITED THE SLOWBURN MAN.

so freaking annoying. why would i do that. AND ANGST which is also annoying

but yup, he helped me a lot, also bc he also lives in new york, so he can help me there :))

(he gives me a little flower everytime we meet, but we are still 'friends' so it should mean nothing BUT IT MEANS SOMETHING TO ME GUYS. it's super super super cute and i wanna hug him so badly, but i am not doing it bc of paparazzi, those rats are following me and oscar literally everywhere 💀)

the whole may was me writing script for a movie, shooting joker II, planning on moving out and meeting oscar just for 'helping me with this nyc thing'

ＪＵＮＥ

'Priscilla' movie with me in main role had its global premiere! I missed this vibe so so so so much, and being on the same red carpet as CILLA PRESLEY had me in tears. i think i've never been more stressed in this dr but she was sooooo kind to me like I CANNOT BELIEVE IT i will have this moment tatooed i swear to god!!!

(i hope this movie will give me an oscar nominee tbh OH WAIT I SCRIPTED IT)

i also got a 2 months break from joker II :) bc they are shooting the scenes without me, so i can finally 'rest' and get my life in new york together

well... beside that, nothing new happened. scripting, FINALLY all my things that i wanted in new york already are there, so week after the movie premiere i moved in :'))

also, i auditioned for some random (lmao) part in new kingsman movie that is in making

from funny things that happened: pedro locked himself in his car LMAO idk how did this happen but he literally called me and oscar to help him before calling the police or smth. HOW COULD YOU LOCK YOURSELF IN YOUR OWN CAR BRO this is too funny to be true. IF YOU COULD SEE OUR FACES

then we grabbed some coffee and went to central park (me and oscar of course were making fun of pedro but who wouldn't)

ＪＵＬＹ

I. STILL. DID. NOT. MOVE. ON. FROM. THIS.

my beloved billie want ME to sing with HER on her new single? LIKE WHAT

W H A T

ofc i said yes WHO WOULDN'T

this is ubelievable

i will NEVER shut up about this. we were working on this song for like the whole month, i came back from NYC to LA just to be close to her and finneas, so we would work together in one room, not online. UGHHH I CANNOT BELIEVE IT

❥•°❀°•༢

i had A HUGEEEEEEE break from my fame dr but i am back? and im SO HAPPY? i still cannot believe that i truly was there again ;'(

me in priscilla movie? WHAT

me and billie making song together? WHAT

me and oscar living in new york, so i can see him more? W H A T

[bwoahtastic]

"Nico for sure used to do karting under a fake name" obsessed with this idea.

Baby Nico and baby Lewis meeting at a karting competition and immediately becoming best friends. Lewis doesn't really hang out with the other kids because they're mean to him and they hate that he beats them, but Nico is nice to him, telling him what a good race he had and inviting him to join her for lunch. Lewis thinks that Nico is so cool. She knows so much about F1 and loves karting too, plus her dad knows so much and is nice to him, which can't be said about all of the parents (I feel like Keke would just shave off his moustache and suddenly become unrecognisable).

Nico and Lewis spend months emailing back and forth, and are always so excited to see each other at karting events. Lewis's sisters tease him SO MUCH about the photos he has of him and Nico, which annoys him so much because they're just friends shut up Nicola! (That's actually Lewis's sister's name btw) Lewis thinks it's a bit weird that Nico and her dad always travel with six really muscular guys (I do think Mika should be in charge of Nico's security), but Nico says that it's just for protection, and once Lewis's dad has talked about it with Keke and is totally fine with it, Lewis stops worrying.

Nico invites Lewis on holiday and he gets to do so many cool things for the first time with her. He gets to ride in a private plane, ride in a helicopter, go surfing and snorkeling and scuba diving. And through all of this he still has no idea that Nico is a princess. Everyone around them speaks in French, which Lewis doesn't understand, and he assumes that when the bodyguards call Nico princess, it's just a cute nickname. He just assumes that all of the weird stuff about Nico and her family is because they're rich, not because they're royal.

One night when they're teenagers, Nico and Lewis sneak out to go to a nightclub in the local town (Mika following them so he knows they're safe). They have a few drinks and get a little tipsy but mostly dance. Nico even helps Lewis flirt with a local girl, and Lewis makes sure that no one bothers Nico. Unfortunately, the paparazzi finds out that Nico is there, and when they leave, they get photographed. Mika steps in to make sure they're safe, but the pretty little princess of Monaco stumbling out of a Greek nightclub with an unknown boy is definitely making the papers.

The family rushes back to the palace in crisis mode to prevent the pr disaster and Lewis finally learns that his best friend is actually a princess. He's a bit hurt that she lied to him for so long, but when she tells him that she just wanted to be normal he forgives her. It does also explain quite a lot of the weird things she's said over the years. Lewis also meets Nico's little cousin Charles who is very sweet.

Lewis and Nico stay best friends throughout the years. She goes off to university, and he's making his way through the junior formula series but they always make time for each other. When he makes it in F1 she goes to as many races as possible. He doesn't win Monaco his first year, but she gives him a kiss on the cheek instead of Fernando, and it brings him luck throughout the year. Lewis is very protective of Nico as her flirting with Jenson becomes more serious, and more than once he warns Jenson of what he will do if Jenson hurts her.

Oh plss!

Lil 5 year old Nico begging her papa to race and her mum is unsure about how they will do it safely without anyone recognising them but Keke will happily shave his moustache because he is excited his little girl wants to share that with him! (And then he would wear a fake moustache outside of the racing lmao)

Lewis not having many friends in karting until this tiny blonde girl shows up and shares her candy with him while talking about the karting race ans she is so nice to him! Also Keke is kind to Lewis and even helps mend his kart after it breaks down.

Lewis and Nico emailing and always hanging out at races until Nico invites Lewis to come visit her when he is close to Monaco. They don't go to the Palace but to the apartment the family own too (Nico prefers it over the cold palace, ans maybe her parents divorced so papa lives there with her now)

Lewis gets to do all kinds of cool stuff eith Nico and he alwsys just assumes it's cos Nico is rich, has no clue for years until they get photographed outside a club and Nico panics so much!

They get whisked off to have the pr team talk to them about strategy and Lewis learns his best friend is the princess of Monaco... he would be so confused and a little hurt but Nico is still his best friend and he understands why she hid it!

Lewis also meeting little Charles who is Nico's shadow and comes ro snuggle her seeing Nico is upset! Cuties!

Nico qnd Lewis continuing to be friends as Lewis climbs his way up in motorsport and Nico goes to university, and Lewis is so happy to have her come along to races once he makes it to f1! He knows there is rumours about them dating, but Nico is like a sister to him!

And pls sksk Nico kissing Lewis's cheek instead of Fernando's (she does eventually give in and kisses his cheek too lol) and it brings him good luck!

Lesis being wary of jenson flirting with nico cos he is such a playboy, but he csn see Jenson is different around the princess, so kind and calm and so clearly in love!

[feuqueerfire]

Wandee Goodday Ep 1 - 5 Live Blogging

When I watched the GMMTV 2024 Part 1 announcements, I was still going through my show slump/apathy phase, so wasn't super hyped about this show. However, as time went on and my interest in series and BLs reignited, I started anticipating this more and now I can't wait to watch this show until it finishes airing because people have been liking it so much.

I've seen Great in Manner of Death and I watched NetJames' side story in Catch Me Baby, so I didn't actually see Great much for that. I know Inn was in Miracle of Teddy Bear but I didn't watch that.

I tried watching 23.5 while it was airing but was terrible at keeping up with it weekly, I ended up practically just doing 2 small binges. BUT it's fine if I can't keep up weekly with this because I'm in the middle of some other cool show when this releases or whatever, I'll just... catch up on 2-3 eps at once when I have the chance. It's fine. I'm just watching it because it seems fun and I wanna be in on the general conversation since everybody seems to be watching and enjoying this one. I hope it holds up until the end.

Fun to see this post on reddit r/GMMTV that highlighted how Great and Inn used to have shippers back in the day lmfao and now a decade later, a main lead in a BL. The post is literally from August 1, 2023, months before the Wandee trailer, I think Inn joined around that time (while Great joined earlier).

Also fun to see them talk about how they actually became a pair. Interesting to see that Great was promised Beauty Newbie (side) and Wandee Goodday (main) if he signed and was told Inn would be the partner if he signed; I wish Inn spoke a bit about what he was promised if he signed, was it just Wandee since he's not in any other 2024 series.

Long preamble because I'm stalling until it's 12am and the new month starts so that I can finally start this because I don't wanna start it in May lmfao, 10 more minutes. I'm browsing reddit wandee posts before release and they seriously posted some cute photos from when they were shooting.

Ep 1 (June 1)

1-1

ah, Wandee's character is the one who doesn't wanna kiss?

3 Days Ago

Wandee means good day

asexual Drake (Kao) yayyy

heroic Wandee

Are Yak and Cher the same age? With Oye being older than them?

oh, Yak and Oye are brothers fr?

aw, Yak secretly meeting a girl behind his brother's back but Cher knows, that's cute, I like their teasing dynamic that still has space for them to share stuff with each other

Dee is soooo in love with Dr. Ter lol, he's wide-eyed like this O.O

is ter purposefully torturing Dee lmao does he know about Dee's big big crush

8 years?! he's had this crush for that long?

Wandee's supposed to not be the original doctor but is being asked a favour

ah, their first meeting

Waited so long to watch it that I have to go to sleep but great start

1-2

antagonistic start

Yak is so rude, please

ah, fast beating heart

"I hope we don't have to see each other again, Dr. Wandee" well

scholarship to study abroad: Dee vs Ter

Wandee's so cute with this boss Doctor too lol

waittttt Yak's definitely several years younger than Wandee right? hehe. because Wandee's a full doctor and doesn't seem he's a new one either while Yak's in his final year (may have been taking longer than graduate than usual, so maybe older than 22 but not that much older?)

Taem being paid by Yak to do his homework lol

lol Taem rejecting Yak before he even finished asking. "I'm yet to finish my delivery to your doorstep. You returned it before it reached there."

Yak getting rejected and Wandee will be rejected

1-3

I will Need Kao to get a boyfriend by the end btw

8 years ago he was a freshman, so Wandee is ~26 years old? If Thai uni starting age is also ~18

please, not Wandee literally letting out an exhale-laugh and saying "I'll let you say it again" when Ter says he likes girls

ah, the Too Vanilla comment

and chasing after Dee to ask for the scholarship lmfao

wild Dee is so embarrassing at the club, idek how I'll make it through the convenience store scene (I'd seen clips/gifset of it before but I didn't have the knowledge of their antagonistic initial meeting back then)

a chance meeting and Dee following Yak

1-4

pleaseeeeee I can't loll

the condom is actually sending me, the audacity omg

the cashier being like oh condom only? lube is essential too

ah, drunk with the trash

Room 609 (Bedtime Story? Another P'Golf show)

ah, Yak's into it as soon as he steps through the door. Wandee's embarrassing display actually worked lmfao though I guess he was attracted to him before then too

it's like 2am

Yoryak means giant?! pls

loll The Eclipse cameo

so much talk about Yak's dick goddamn

the shaking causing "Ordinary days that will never be the same again" book to fall

this part had me pausing and holding my head so much ahhh

Inn as Wandee has such wide sparkly eyes, feels like glitter effects should be on screen sometimes when he blinks. Reminds me a bit of Triage's Tol played by Tee. Also JamFilm To Sir With Love/Laws of Attraction's Film kinda.

But also Wandee's so... him being pushy like why don't you like me >:( at Ter (though he dropped that quite quickly) and then just openly following around and harassing Yak was wild lol

Ep 2 (June 1/2)

I'm trying to only watch 1 ep a day so that I don't have to wait too long for ep 6 but I also just want to binge what's out, so we'll see how long I do 1-1.25 eps a day

2-1

oh, we're picking up right where we left on - in the middle of the sex on the couch with the Eclipse playing

Wandee's insecurities + being mad about being called vanilla lol

my Akk and Ayan witness to all this

"once is enough" they keep saying things like let's hope we never meet again and once is enough, like don't you two know you're main leads in a romance drama?

Dee not giving Yak his contact

Dee fr locked that man out

they're antagonistic again

I like established Yei and Cher

lol ofc Yak spending the night is apparently uncharacteristic for him

wtf did Ter try to speak on behalf of Dee to forfeit the scholarship? let's kill him

2-2

omg let's fucking kill Ter, him using Dee's feelings for him to be like give up the scholarship for me? please? and we can def talk about your feelings after I come back <3

lol Yak really waited and schemed until he got Dee as his doctor

ah, Yak saw the convo between Ter and Dee

ahhhh Yak redirecting from almost holding Dee's hand to pretend he was curious about the pen

plssss this cow costume for his school project video

oh yeah, Yak likes Taem

I like Taem

Yak thinking of vulnerable Dee even when he's with Taem

are these two people sinister? wait, are they gonna drug Dee?

agh, scary. Personally not a fan of attempted sexual assault/rape/noncon recording or whatever else being portrayed just so our ML can sweep in and be the hero because these are serious and scary things and make me feel other emotions than just <333 yay I'm glad our ML is here to help <333

2-3

Less Expectations More Satisfaction neon lights over the bed kills me every time

pls not the freaking sponge bath at 1:30am

Yak's like already so into Dee, whelp

cuddles

I kept noticing the clock; I don't think it should've been at 1:38 by the end, maybe 1:4_

SEVENTY PERCENT?! not on the written part but on the campaign for the department that'll be voted by other doctors/nurses/etc?

hehe the cafe and P'Golf as a server, is it the same cafe as The Eclipse? Does both The Eclipse and the cafe in it exist in Wandee Goodday lol

and even in the show the character is named Golf

ah, here's the grandma

damn, Dee's parents are dead?!

2-4

okay, I'm back in the morning after having slept

Does Yak still like Taem? does he just wanna hang out with her as a friend? Does he realize that he's falling for Dee? Is he just in the habit of asking Taem to things?

oh, he's wistful so I guess he does indeed still like Taem

Dee taking care of Yak kinda and wanting to know what's wrong

woah, Direct

[Linguistics] Yak refers to Dee as Maw/Khun Maw/Doctor and Dee refers to Yak as boxer guy but right now, he used 'Nai.' I think they also use Khun with each other

the FWB proposal and establishing rules

first kiss? oh, Dee

[Linguistics] oh, Yak doesn't like that Dee refers to him as with Nai 2nd person pronouns and wants him to use his name.

omg I am so shy when watching them but have so much fun. Yak being like i like you moaning :) let's have another round and Dee being like okay but this time you have to play with my dick longer like okay, let's go, talking about what we want

loll the costumes come about because of the concern about Yak getting into a scandal?

Kao and this security guard?

the A/C service one when Ter's also in the elevator is sooo good

[Linguistics] cleaning fridge = rimming euphimism in Thai, I've learned. how fun

oh my god i love how puppy Yak is when Dee's wiping his head

damn, the mood is so romantic. almost kiss from Yak and giving him the necklace and kissing his chest. different than the more fun/sexual-tension-filled vibes of their other scenes

When I binge, I like episodes to be 40-45 mins but when I watch weekly, I'm mad that it's not 55 mins at least lol

I wanna know how old Yak is because he referred to himself as a grandpa student.

Sometimes this BL touches on interesting topics and just the whole aspect of FWB-while-we-both-have-other-crushes to kind of get over their crush and battle their loneliness is engaging on its own. It feels somewhat mature in its discussion around sex and what they each like or want. Still, it also sometimes feels immature, like the spiking (+ planning to take noncon videos of him?!) that's only there so that Yak can rescue him (the topic itself is really dark but the way they deal with it feels so... handwavy) or the scholarship being 70% popularity contest.

I don't know, I hope the narrative is coherent throughout the whole 12 eps and I continue to like it. Unfortunately, I can't hope for "Less expectations, More satisfaction" because I'm only watching this on-air because I'm expecting to love it, so I hope I don't regret that. I'm having fun so far.

Also, I guess it was indeed AJ who was also in the Eclipse because this is so funny: "I also appreciate that P'Golf's determination to make AJPloy happen is so great that she turned one character into a girl and completely created another one out of thin air."

Their short Ep 2 reaction

Look how puppy

Ep 3 (June 2)

2nd episode of the already oof

3-1

oh yeaa, i saw the 69 gifs

such a cute su su na

Yakalso has deceased parents?

cheek sniff kiss

ahh the lack of vs the acquiring of the necklace being noticed. it's like they're leaving their marks on each other (though they told their friends/family that they're just FWBs)

omg Yak is a known generous person when dating

just realized Dr. Kwan is Emi

office gossip

voice message about missing Yak... video of him doing situps to Dee... girl.

why does Yak look so confused when confronted with his own video that he sent lmfao

Dee's apparent flaw... he loves to win

Dee likes to order Yak around lol being like say you miss me and also change my lightbulb

Dee's nodding when Yak's like let's see if this works is very cute, very puppy also

3-2

oof, they mentioned last ep 2 the costs of running this gym and now they're bringing up financial troubles again

ah, and Yei doesn't want to let on how much things aren't okay + doesn't want to borrow from Cher's (presumably rich) mother

Dee the fucking clown

oh noo this kid has cancer

is the not having enough skilled physicians gonna come back?

aw, video call

the nurses all being women and feminine gay men is interesting ig

anyway ig it's fine that they're also gossipy/mean(?) since there are several other non-villainous gay/queer people in the show, although none are quite as feminine as these 2. though there aren't many women, just Taem and possibly Kwan but they both have small parts

and this is how the fake boyfriend thing starts

3-3

Dee's thinking of getting Yak to be his pretend boyfriend but like, didn't Yak not wanna get caught?

[Linguistics] I have no idea if Yak's saying "then take back your paper kha" but I wish I knew if he was or if it's just part of the word

no fr how is Dee even asking this of Yak and it's not even a real relationship!! "Please come out for this fake boyfriend stint even though you're afraid it'll affect your career"

Dee is at the gym?! girl

Yei notices Yak's necklace

[Linguistics] Okay, Yak definitely used kha when he says Doctors are rich

Dee is a menace, let the man alone!

Cher calls Yei Phi, Dee Phi, but not Yak. so he's same age or older than Yak but younger than Dee, which confirms that Dee is older than Yak (in the novel Yak's apparently 20 while Dee's 29 but that's not happening here lol)

lol cute, Yak teaching Dee how to box. i wanna take up boxing too

3-4

the way Dee grabs Yak's hand to place it on his own thigh is so good somehow

man, Dee being sad is pitiful but like Yak was extremely clear that he won't do it and Dee's the one who's chasing him and keeps asking him

oh, we're suddenly getting Dee having flashbacks to his parents' death

sharing food <3

[Linguistics] Yak using Rao as 1st person pronoun with Dee

CCTV in his room where he fucks would be crazy lmfao

not the fireworks as Yak is sufficiently convinced to be fake boyfriends. i imagine something will go wrong for him down the line though, oof

bro why are they acting like taking up the scholarship competition is some sort of challenge against the senior specifically when they were both offered the chance to compete for the scholarship by higher-ups

why are they doing all these dramatics in front of patients waiting too, bruh

naurrrr not public flower bouquet gift to show people that Dee indeed has a bf T.T I don't wanna press play, I actually cannot with anything public esp when it's not fake and played up like this T.T

Yak is instantly recognizable to the patients, girl I hope this doesn't have a blowback on your boxing career, you know the traditional and masculine field which I expect has homophobic tendencies (and Yak knows it too). but also Yei has a legit boyfriend and mans was a world champion or something too, right? or are they a secret?

please, their acting

why are we doing PDA I'm skimming, finger on the forward button bc ahh embarassing

going from fake boyfriends in public to domestic FWBs cooking together in private lol alright

I kept wondering if the necklace was going to be given back when they weren't speaking and Yak was like this is over but that never happened. interesting ig

I muted the tag after episode 3, so eps 4-5 will mostly be new stuff for me, though I know some general stuff too

Ep 1: Yak saves a pathetic Dee from the trash cans. Ep 2: Yak saves a drugged Dee from those fuckers (I still don't like that they used this plot point). Ep 3: Yak saves Dee by agreeing to be his fake boyfriend after his genuine pathetic monologue about why he needs a bf and why it needs to be Yak.

I hope Dee also helps out Yak or initiates things, especially because I think the last thing he promised Yak was that the boyfriend thing won't get out of the hospital but uhh I don't think that's gonna be possible. Dee's insistence on the fake-BF thing as he ignores Yak's nos for most of the eps is blagh, but I guess it stems from his need to win. So we'll see whether he can ever "lose" to Yak or be there for Yak when he needs him or what.

Ep 4 (June 3)

55 minutes long, fun

4-1

they were pretty grown when Yak's mom died, I'd thought he'd be younger

Ter doesn't like to see Dee move on but is it for sinister reasons or for hidden feelings reasons

Dee and Yak running into Kwan dropping food off for Ter early in the morning. them living in the same condo allows for such shenanigans

[Linguistics] Dee using Ai'Yak

Ter room#: 666 lol and he's imagining the good times when Dee used give him food

eating tons of food in the show while Great was dieting/starving/dehydrated af while filming with all these shirtless scenes

Yak telling Dee about Taem, interesting. but does that mean he really wasn't jealous of Dee possibly still liking Ter? they're literally discussing Taem and Yak's crush on her now.

[Linguistics] ahhhh Dee said "You don't know how to flirt, do you? Do you want Phi to teach you?" and Yak defff uses kha with Dee sometimes, especially in a teasing moment

goddd they're practice-flirting

omgggg and Dee getting into the fake-confession as he thinks of his time with Yak

and Yak is OBSESSED with wanting to kiss Dee bruh

omg and now Dee's the one who's like fuckkkk as Yak's excited about asking out Taem

ah, Yak probably doesn't want to be a boxer and that might be why he's wanting to finish up his degree? but also mans does not do work for that degree, he pays Taem to do it lmfao

Cher being like well, idk if you still like Taem but Yak's like I'm not somebody who changes his mind easily. is that why he's still holding onto (past?) feelings for Taem even as he's falling for Dee?

plsss horny thoughts during situps

Yak is literally dizzy with horniness, that's so funny lmao

ohh Taem appears. and Yak's like :D while Dee's like :(

4-2

the music and mood change between Taem/Yak's convo vs Dee's angry boxing (but he can't even box properly so his hits are weak)

hints that Taem likes Ohm and Yak knows that Taem likes Ohm

oh nvm not even just hints lol he calls and then appears and they're coming and going together and Taem is eager in a way that she is not with Yak

i love her little 2-finger salute she does to say hi and bye

Taem also notices the Yoryak necklace lmfao everybody clocking them

"A jealous man has been sighted at the boxing club" Dee, girl... make that 2 men

Dee being speechless and uncomfortable knowing Yak's planning on hitting on Taem fr

plsss Yei and Cher spying on them in the hot spa or whatever

oh yeah, what does Kao work in again? I assumed something with sexual health because he talked about his patients sometimes going from ONS to FWB or whatever. i love you, our asexual sex and sexual health doctor

plsss her listing stuff out they've tried

her: "i tried everything, even if it's not me." him: "should i try having sex with somebody else?" i actually can't

Dee at least realizing he's getting jealous over Yak

I'm nervous that somebody at the hospital's gonna overhear their convo and know that it's a fake relationship

aksdjfl;kasdfj Kao smiling and wanting to strangle Dee when he says he promised Yak he'll help pursue his crush

ah, Kao telling Dee to hold off on his heart and not fall deeper or whatever and that def makes sense to not fall for your FWB/fake-bf who you're helping pursue his "real" crush but wrong advice for a romance drama lol

neither Yak nor Dee have armpit hair (from the sauna scene and swimming scene).

4-3

the thumbnail has them with faces really close but I don't think they've kissed actually

Yak almost kissing Dee once againnnnn girl

Ter saw them at the pool...

at least Ter has enough brains to realize it's fake lol

oh, apparently everybody at this hospital goes on break at the same time lmfao

Ter wanting Dee to wait and saying he was just confused before... stfu

glad that even though Dee kinda goes in a daze sometimes, he hasn't yet given in to Ter's manipulative tactics at all

physiotherapy lol

idek why they need to sleep in the same room or why they need to mention it in front of everybody instead of just Yei or Cher lol

oh, they're certainly orchestrating some IG stories lol it's clearly so planned bro, could've at least made it seem more casual by like having a sliver of Yak in the shot when pretending you're focused on some cool food or smth

Dee hanging out and having dinner with Yak, Yei and Cher

4-4

is him graduating Yak's mother's dream?

Dee tutoring Yak, somewhat of a parallel to Taem tutoring him

pls, even Kwan catching Ter looking at Dee's story lmfao anyway ig I feel bad for her if she likes Ter. I hope she gets over him quickly and finds somebody better

Yak boxing and Dee also cheering him on through the screen at work

and bragging about Yak to Kao lmfao

Kao being like girl... you two aren'ts fake boyfriends anymore, y'all like each other

Kao's Sleepless Sleepwear lmfaooo hey friend, can you try on these costumes for sex that I made and lmk how it goes?

Yak has a little bunny tail awww cute

Yak getting mad that Dee doesn't consider him a close friend cuteee

i love Dee sniff kissing Yak's cheek like Yak's always kissing Dee, so I like it the other way around too

okay, extra post-credit scene

omg talking about HPV vaccine and how just condoms can't prevent all STIs, we should be aiming for safer sex

Dee gets me when he calls Yak Big Doggie, I keep calling them both puppies

It's not just for Dee, it's for Yak too, we're all protecting ourselves

Yak apparently is recognized by everybody, including the nurse. and dee did say hundreds of thousands of people watch the matches live

Grandma coming over to visit next ep, heheheheheh

Ep 5 (June 3)

i'm so excited to see the grandma but not excited to be all caught up and have to wait weekly for 7 more weeks eughhhh

5-1

damn, Yak's also here with Dee to surprise the patient child? Isn't Yak himself Dee's patient too lol

they're quite familiar with each other, so I guess they've met the patient several times before

lol peeking at birthday. Also Yokyak knowing down to the minute how long they've been together... okay

P'Golf plsss "I watch [boxing] for the eye candy"

Dee being Baffled at P'Golf wanting him to take the photo of her and Yak lmfaooo it's like P'Golf has brought the two of you together and she can also tear you apart

since they've been together for 1 month (I'm assuming since the fake dating began? or around then), there are 3 months left of their deal?

I think straight up half of Kwan's lines are just saying Wandee and his bf are cute together

Kao conducting an Interview about his animal pyjamas for sex

he's giving them sex homework i'm crying

Dee loves to win and losing bothers Yak

damn, what's Yei thinking about at night? money problems?

it's strange to see them fighting and to see Yei be kind of apathetic since he's always all up on Cher

I like this because it's like even though Cher puts up a (typical in BLs) perfunctory fight and says to stop when Yei kisses up on him and hints at sex, it's not real protest because they're just playing lol and Cher's desire for Yei to initiate it when he hasn't for a few days shows that

aww Cher's 2nd time asking if Yei has somebody else or is bored of him already :( the second question seriously reminds me of LITA Sky to Prapai

they're so cuteee Yei being like how many nights do I owe you

they're wearing fucking bunny and tiger ears after presumably having sex looking at outfits for Yak that will impress Taem

Yak boutta change himself for Taem (and she still will continue to like Ohm) while Dee likes him just the way he is

grandma is so fun hehe

AND THE EARS ARE STILL ON

"keep pulling the pants up" plssss

5-2

a dick plush pillow pls

bro i'm so confused with the use of the word faen, like I thought it included Exclusivity? but the way Dee talks about Yak having a faen during that breakfast convo before finding out about Taem or here when he tells his grandmother than Yak has a faen, it doesn't seem to imply that Yak's literally cheating on his faen but nor does he mention any polyam situation or anything. why doesn't he say crush instead of faen?

Dee being like I shouldn't develop any deep feelings for him but they getting up to watch Yak sleep and crosses the invisible line...

aw, they've gotten used to cuddling

cuddling in couch and bringing up Taem, it's almost like Yak brings Taem up whenever he feels like he's liking Dee too muchor something

don't give your grandma the bunny ears you wore for sex!!

introducing your fake boyfriend to your parents when you take him to their graves while he wants to be introduced just as regular real boyfriend

5-3

ah, Yak's already implementing the outfit changes. that's legit what Ohm was wearing lmfao

not Cher following Yei

aghhh I know we're not getting answers for that this episode though because I saw somebody guessing what Yei's hiding, meaning we don't find out. and i'm not gonna just have the next episode available alksdjfkladsf >:((

gathering votes

5-4

legit laughed at the huge ass banana right after them eating the hotdog sausage thing

pls i get so embarassed/shy watching this show

they're baking together, how cute

got stressed thinking about cleaning all this flour everywhere

oof, Ter taking Kwan to the restaurant Dee took him to... He's just using Kwan right? They don't want us to like Ter right?

fitting lyrics... it's an OST right?

Yak wants to kiss on the lips and Dee's ready for it too

Yak's been taking videos of grandma and Dee and now even posting a Gooddy photo on his IG

sudden position argument WandeeYoryak vs YoryakWandee like it's a funny moment but girl y'all are already fucking, how is it a question? you know the answer

Very fun so far, I'm really enjoying it. I do wish these Thai BLs were like the het dramas that release 2x a week so that I don't have to rely on getting less than one hour a week for 2 more months.

I'm curious about their first kiss, what the Yei secret is, how they'll deal with their growing feelings, and I really hope it's all explored well and coherently pleaseeee. I can't watch a show as it airs, wait for many weeks to get to the end and have it be bad, I'll lose my shit. Wandee Goodday, I believe in you!

[cinemaocd]

Tag Reviews Vol. 1

November Films Watched:

Irma Vep (1996): #ok we have finally watched this it has been on the list for more than five years #interesting commentary on the film industry-angsty arthouse movie that makes fun of angsty arthouse movies #revealing a wriggling mass of hippocrites #paranoiacs and burn outs behind the cameras#and one isolated woman who was being fetishized both as part of the parody and by the film itself #it was really ahead of its time lmao

Ladies in Retirement (1944): #yeah this is really intresting#kind of a hard sell after recently watching arsenic and old lace which is almost a direct parody of this #but some interesting performances and I love having women led stories where the main disruption is a man...such a lesbian vibe about this#especially Elsa Lanchester who stomps around tidying the moors and making ugly arrangements of shells and plants and driftwood in the house#basically me if I had no job or husband/child#anyway...this was interesting though not a hit with the boys and I can see why I guess. Ida Lupino is something to watch in it.

Mermaids (1990): #it's a whole family of manic pixie dream girls and bob hoskins has to try to keep them from murdering each other

#you know I love a bob hoskins lead dramedy#also I learned watching this that my son pronounces “cher” with a hard “CH”#(imagine baltimore accent saying “chair” and that's how he says it I swear)

The Big Sleep (1978): #oh man this was dreadful#the earlier Mitchum as Marlowe film-farewell my lovely--is a classic and one of the great noirs of all time#this follow up...is not#for one thing they just skipped the period setting and moved the whole thing to England because it's still the 1930s in England at all time#the only thing going for it is that it is way easier to follow than the far more stylish and famous 1946 film#thanks to watching this I actually KNOW what happens in the fucking big sleep

Working Girls (1931):#working girls#dorothy arzner#dorothy hall#judith wood#this was good#comedy but very grounded in reality and feels really ahead of its time like something that would be make in the 60s to be honest#pre-code hollywood. #this is a little gem of a comedy...very low key and with a grittier outlook than you'd expect from a few years later#pre-code hollywood#judith wood is really pretty good in this I don't understand why her career died when the code came in

Time Without Pity (1957): #still photos don't michael justice he is such a mess in this and not in a hot way at all#it's the total dissolution of a man's body and soul before your eyes the whole thing is kind of torture to watch from beginning to end#but the cast is stellar and joseph losey cranks up the tension and doesn't let go for a second#without pity indeed#also Dirk Bogard is in it for .5 seconds#as are joan plowright and peter cushing

Canterbury Tale (1944): #Oh I forgot I actually like this movie even though it's slow and ham fisted but I don't mind the whole glue man thing #I kind of wanted Eric Portman not to be real but to turn into some kind of sprite and disappear #Anyway I've been in a very Cahtedral-y mood since being in the old country #and also revisiting the Mirror and the Light#anyway dennis price is really underused in this #but it just makes you appreciate him all the more when he does appear

The Big Sleep (1946): #this film is really confusing but worth making multiple passes at just for the dialog/interactions which honestly every scene is great

[noriko04]

Tagged by @eternal-echoes (ty ^^)

1) The last Podcast you listened to? with reasons.

some months ago I listened to a podcast about the damaging effects of mouth breathing . Maybe for those who never heard about it this may seem... both weird and boring but as a teen I discovered I have this subconscious habit and even though I now mostly fixed this issue I sometimes still have some interest in informing myself more deeply about it.

2) what was the last fanfic you read? What did you like about it?

Oh boy, it's been a while since the last time I've read a fanfiction. It was one year ago, roughly, and it was about Hakuoki (I think it's easy to infer that this series is my current fixation XD). I think there was some angst involved though I don't remember well. And the way feelings were described... Amazing. Very beautiful, there a lot of very talented artists in that fandom.

3) You favorite discord server?

I don't have a discord actually and I don't feel the urge of making an account for it at the moment. Maybe in the future I'll do.

4) open Pinterest and show the first think it recommends you!

ok :)

kitty, some nature pictures and Hakuoki related stuff (beautiful fan art btw). Yup, undeniably my account

5) If your comfortable, show me something from your notes app!

Uhmmm.... I use my notes app mainly to write down passwordS, pins and other personal information so I'll pass on that (I know this is probably not the best way to store this stuff. I'll organize myself better... Once I'll overcome my laziness lmao).

6) Show us who you last gave a like on Tumblr! And why?

Link: https://www.tumblr.com/myrcellathemarred/109213275952?source=share

I love this so much so I think I'll reblog it too. There are times where I feel in the mood for spam reblogging/spam liking old posts about HIM and this is the period. And by HIM I mean Okita Souji from Hakuoki.

For those who don't know him... well you can see that he can be very unhinged. But he is at the same super sweet once you get to know him in the game (in the anime too, but in the visual novel he's explored more deeply) . He is very complex and I can say with convinction that he has occupied a very special place in my heart <3.

I wonder if I'll ever get cured by my Souji-addiction (but frankly, I don't event want to be :) )

7) Show us a picture that's in your galary that you are proud off/like/are comfortable sharing.

I think I'll pass on that too. Most of the stuff in my gallery are boring screenshots. I have personal photos too but I'm not comfortable sharing them here.

8) final question, what was the last YouTube video you watched?

Tarot card reading based on my zodiac sign lol. I'm not sure I fully believe in this stuff but I still find it interesting.

I don't know if everyone feels like participating in this so as usual no pressure. Tagging: @krisomela, @flowerynameslover, @himiko-omikami, @nuriakendo, @riveroflonging, @mydemonsandme

If I forgot some people on this list who want to participate feel free to tell me and I'll tag you as well.

[lachrymimosaa]

m*thers

every time my mom is due to come back to CO, in the weeks leading up to her return, she's effervescent and effusive. secretly, my mom hates coming back to CO. don't know why, doesn't really matter. but instead of saying this from the outset, she conceals it until like 3 days before her flight out, or 1 day into her actual visit home.

then she picks fights. usually with us (me+my sister), her sister, or one or her friends. it's always over something trivial.

last time, i wanted to take her to my favorite brunch spot. my treat because her husband always treats me to nice dinners when i visit them. i told her 1000x it was my treat. the morning came that i had reservations for and i reminded her. she replied, "I DONT HAVE INFINITE MONEY TO SPEND TREATING YOU TO NICE MEALS!!!!"

three things: i said a thousand fucking times it would be my treat. none of the money in her account is actually hers because she hasn't worked in 5 years; it's her husband's. i had already bought dinner/breakfast/tickets to meow wolf/all of our ubers/her beer supply/food for home at that point.

i get testy and say that i was planning on treating us all and that her response was very hostile and unnecessary, especially when i have made it clear that i do not expect her to pay.

that was the final straw for her. she told me i was a bitch, selfish, "a mean daughter" (lmao. just lmao), that i had ruined her trip, that i made it so she never wanted to visit me again. she kicked me out of her airbnb and cut her trip short by 3 days.

THIS TIME, she tagged her (hotheaded, idiotic) sister in a photo on FB of them in california a year ago. her sister is trying to get disability and felt the photo may be harmful to her case. her sister, my aunt, is also insane and blows things way out of proportion — called my mom screaming at her, accusing her of sabotaging her case, etc, demanding she delete the photo. my mom deletes the photo. THEN she and her sister get into a three day back-and-forth via text and FB messenger about how the other is a cunt, accusing one another of playing the victim, digging up buried hatchets to swing them at each other, just going full scorched earth.

they block each other on everything. my mom says she doesn't plan to see my aunt when she comes home. i say yeah, probably a good idea, and at least she can't contact you now either.

a day passes. my mom unblocks her to continue arguing. she cannot leave it the fuck alone. she cannot refrain from continuing to stir the pot.

then she calls me crying because she wants to cancel her whole trip. because she "can't take it". i say what. she says YOUR AUNT!!!!!!! i say, didn't you already block her on everything and decide not to see her? you have to cancel your entire trip over someone who can't contact you who you weren't going to visit anyway? like there is 0 reason for this. also it isn't even "her trip", it's a trip her husband wanted to take so he could go to a football game with his childhood best friend. so she's making him eat shit on airline/airbnb cancellation fees and the tickets he has are going to waste because she can't stop being a fucking 11 year old about shit.

like talk about cutting your nose off to spite your face. i cannot imagine being married to this woman. it was unbearable being raised by her and at least now i get to choose my level of contact/involvement. but he works from home, she never leaves the house, and all she does is drink all day and pick fucking fights on facebook and feel sorry for herself. like sometimes when i hang with my stepdad i can barely recognize the light or spark in his eyes bc he's so deep in her darkness with 0 way out. he's isolated. he's trapped inside with her. i just feel bad.

i also feel a little relieved bc she's not coming home lol and i'd been dreading it the entire time. but now we all have to put on a fucking play about how she's not insane at all and it's actually totally reasonable to pick fights with people over stupid shit to goad them into being upset with you so you can feel justified about cancelling your plans and continuing to fester in your home bent over your ipad instead of getting fresh air, touching grass, seeing the people who still call themselves your friends.

idk it's just nuts. she is fully delusional.

[devitalise]

IMOOOOO don't look at the date don't perceive the fact that we're already 3 days into January + it's like a week past your birthday DON'T....... HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY ICON!! YOUR GOLDEN BIRTHDAY, 25 ON 25!! 🎇🎂✨💛 I hope your holiday/celebration/trip to NY was wonderful and your fully developed brain has been treating you well thus far 🧠 tacky of me to combine these messages but we're 25 y/o gals, we're efficient!! SO -- what were YOUR top 5s of 2023? movies, books, music - biggest surprise(s), biggest flop(s)? excited to see what on earth 25 y/o imo gets into this year 💭

OMG THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH CAS!! NEW YORK WAS INCREDIBLE!! i had theee best time my first ever solo trip and i learnt so much about myself and got to go to a bucket list place just amazing really! i took so many pictures i'm putting together a photo album of my 2023 which i'm really excited to look back on. i found some old family pictures recently and there's nothing like looking back at a HQ printed picture and just reliving that moment

you also caught me at the perfect moment as i'm in the middle of revamping my blog as i'll be changing my username at the end of the week.. scary. anyways my top 5!

books

their eyes were watching god by Zora Neale Hurston

fight night by Miriam Toews

my phantoms by Gwendoline Riley

ring shout by P. Djèlí Clark

sterling karat gold by Isabel Waidner

tv shows

i can't remember much of anything i watched at all LMAO. 1. succession for obvious reasons 2. interview with the vampire 3. and that's genuinely all i can remember let's blame the strike

movies

1. malignant 2. across the spiderverse 3. bottoms 4. bones and all 5. saw x

music

i don't think i posted my wrapped on tumblr i can't remember but my favourite releases of the year were 1. amaarae's fountain baby 2. tinashe's bb/ang3l 3. kali uchis' red moon in venus 4. kelela's raven 5. pinkpantheress' heaven knows

personal stuff

2023 was big for me in terms of being more vulnerable with my friends! i feel like i got so much closer with everyone in my life and feel like i actually have a community which has been really nice. there's a lot of promising things that should be coming to fruition this year career wise and i think saving for and planning a trip to New York for my 25th birthday was a milestone all of itself! i'm very excited for what this year has in store for me

[at-thezenith]

Fictional Character Tag Game

tagged by @mrbexwrites, thank u!

1. Do this uquiz and this picrew

no yea, accurate. i am guilty of doing heart fingers in every photo of me ever also

2. three random facts about me

i can read and write french pretty well, but speaking and listening is a crapshoot

i have the worst sweet tooth in the world. anything chocolate i will devour in about 3 seconds

as a fifteen year old i was under the impression that i was the only person on earth who had heard of grouplove (of tongue tied fame). not sure why i thought this given they have 5 million monthly listeners

3. Seven comfort movies

muppets christmas carol. best christmas movie. i won't take criticism

the man from u.n.c.l.e

tintin the secret of the unicorn

the grand budapest hotel

the jungle book (1967)

i actually don't watch a lot of movies lmao but this is as good as i could get it!

tagging: @outpost51 @vcaudley @fleurtygurl and @lavender-laney

[mike----wazowski]

4, 5, 10, or 18?

hey thanks for the ask anon! 🫡

4. how many wips i have right now

in terms of active progress for fanfic... 💀 ive been focusing on my original stuff recently, bc i had like 6 months of rgg craze where i was only writing rgg content shshfh. oh and i also recently updated a fic i left for 3 years so i guess that counts as a wip? rn its a bit dry in the fanfic department tho

5. a fic idea i’ve had that i will never write

ooh god my notes app is full of these. one was a joongi idea where theres still one photo left of his past face in his old school yearbook, and he finds the courage to seek out that yearbook and see the last remaining photo of his old self. i actually still want to write that tbh but my brain is Disorganised so idk if it will happen

another was a shinadai fic idea where shinada's profession is utilised 😮‍💨 in which daigo proofreads a draft of his smut (listen im allowed to have my fun too i dont ALWAYS want to write miserable character drama 😭😭) (yes daigo nitpicks the grammar)

ooh and another fic where i literally wrote over 5k words about a depressed daigo spending a few days at morning glory with kiryu and the kids... why did i just drop that what the fuck i wrote so much of it

10. is there a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

basically all of them bc i always think people will hate them 💀💀 but seriously, the shinadai fic definitely. i spent months writing that purely just for myself and my own self indulgence and i thought absolutely zero people would care but i got some really lovely thoughtful comments and reactions to it :) like it seemed to have an impact and i was so happy and surprised to see that. glad to know the shinadai nation has more than three people!

18. one of my favourite lines i've written in a fic

AAAAA thats hard lmao. a recent line i liked was from my joongi fic

Yeon-su wails when he sees himself in the mirror- where am I? Where have I gone?

i could talk for several years about how barbaric his backstory is but yeah i wanted to capture the potential reaction someone might have when they wake up to see theyve been surgically reconstructed to be someone else