#this person is falling out of love with art

[thefallennightmare]

Just Pretend-Chapter Thirty

*gif created by me. feel free to use, simply give credit*

Parings: Noah Sebastian x Musician! Reader

Warnings/Tropes: language, angst, fluff, smut(18+), star-crossed lovers, right person/wrong time, cheating, talks of mental abuse, talks of death, depressive thoughts, talks about not being able to conceive, and endometriosis.

Summary: “I can wait for years, heaven knows I’m not getting over you.” A story about two star-crossed lovers, that always find their way back because their souls are entwined. The universe desperately attempts to bring them together, no matter what the cost.

Authors Note: If you haven't yet, please read DREAMSTATE before you read this chapter. It's imperative that you do otherwise you will be confused. There is also ONE chapter left after this one. I cannot believe we're almost to the end, folks. It's a very bittersweet feeling.

Tags[CLOSED]: @blueskylinesx @missduffsblog @hayleylatour @sleepyomens @loeytuan98 @artificialbreezy @marvelousmal @bngurngheart @lma1986 @wild-child-7747 @calleyx13 @illmakeyousaywow @jaded-and-hollow-souls @shayzillaaaa @badomensls @shadowseve @collective-heartbreak @klutzy-kay24 @sorrowsofsilence @sweetlittlekitsune @shilohrosechicken @itsafullmoon @toospooktocute @niicoleleigh @thatchickwiththecamera @hoe-for-daddywise @whenthesummerdies @thisbicc @sammyjoeee @joe9cool @ozwriterchick @happi-goth @dsireland86 @cncohshit @heyyoplayer @rain-down-on-mee @respectfulrebel @malerieee @myownthoughts12 @noahsbong @laurpartyprogram @cloudykoookie @sideeyenoah @bellaboo967 @rxdlstgn @anthemheatwave @lobolocaamo @amelia-acero @karenfranco @collidewiththesavannah @xserenax-13 @supersquirrel1996 @themodern-daywednesday @oxythoughtin7715

THIS IS FICTION. NONE OF THIS IS REAL.

NOAH

“Maybe I'll invite them over once I'm back home from the art store. I figured it'll be alright since you have therapy and we’re not going to dinner until four,” she sat up while letting the sheet fall to her lap. 

I was still in a state of shock that I couldn’t even gaze at her perfect breasts, my mind whirling with so many different emotions. All I could do was numbly nod. 

“I must say,” she smirked while brushing away the hair from my face, laying a kiss on my lips. “It’s always great to wake up to you every morning. But on my birthday, it’s extra special.”

Blinking wildly, I shook out the spiderwebs from waking up from my dreamstate and gave her a tender smile while bringing her into my chest. 

“Happy birthday, angel,” I kissed her head. 

Her arms snaked around my back, resting her cheek against my chest. “Thank you, Noah. Oh, you’re sweaty.” 

Her giggles echoed throughout the room as she glanced up at me. “Your heart is also beating so fast. Are you alright?” 

“I just had a nightmare. That’s all,” I assured her. 

The door creaked open causing both of us to look over and see Kuma pushing his way inside, sitting at the bed. He’d grown in size the last week and was beginning to take up a lot of space. 

Not that any of us complained. We loved him. 

“He’s giving me the creepy I need to go out look,” Y/N giggled while getting ready to get out of bed. 

Pushing her back onto the bed and throwing the covers over her, I slipped out while standing to my feet. 

“It’s your birthday. You deserve to sleep in and treat yourself,” I said. 

Pulling out my wallet from the drawer of my nightstand, I tossed my credit card onto her lap. Almost immediately Y/N began to fight my decision but I shook my head. 

“I want to take care of you, Y/N. Especially today. Please?” I begged while jutting out my bottom lip. 

Eventually she nodded and rose to her knees to wrap her arms around my neck. Her gorgeous naked form on display made my cock twitch. If it wasn’t for Kuma staring at us, I’d drag her into the shower for a quick morning birthday sex. 

“How did I get so lucky?” She mused. 

“I think it was me that got lucky, angel,” I said with all the seriousness I could muster. 

Our lips were so close, I could feel her warm breath fan over mine, but as I was about to close the distance Kuma’s deep bark caused both of us to jump. 

“Alright, alright. I’ll let you out,” I sighed. 

With a swift pass to Y/N’s bare ass, she shrieked before running towards the bathroom. With a nod towards the patio door in our room, I led Kuma outside to where he immediately ran over to his typical bathroom spot in the far corner of the yard. Since it was fenced, we didn’t have to worry about him running off. 

As I rubbed a finger over the side of my hand, tracing the letters, I felt a fond smile pull at my lips when I remembered my guide not only in my dreamstate but in my life as well. Every big moment, good or bad, Keaton had been there with me guiding me along. 

“Miss you, man,” I blew out a shaky breath when I remembered how it felt seeing his face again. 

Feeling a soft brush of fur between my legs, I peered down at Salem who purred lovingly. Bringing him up to my chest, I let him rub his face in my neck to which I noticed a few strands of gray fur in his face. The once bright red color I bought him began to dull so I made note to buy him another one today but the tag with the Death of Peace of Mind symbols was still fresh like the first day I put them on his collar. 

“I’m surprised you’re not curled up in bed with Michael,” I spoke to my cat son. 

“Because he woke me up at five this morning screaming to be fed.” 

Snapping my gaze to my right, I saw Michael lounging in the hammock while Jesse and Tay sat together on the outdoor couch, both holding to-go cups from Fika. 

“Well, did you feed him?” I raised a brow at Michael before dropping Salem onto his chest and sitting in one of the chairs around the fire pit; embers still smoking from the fire last night. 

“No, I let him starve,” Michael’s voice was thick with sarcasm as he let Salem snuggle up to him. 

“Where’s the birthday girl?” Tay asked with a smile. 

I motioned towards our bedroom. “Getting ready. I think she might head out to the art store. She’s been wanting to get a new easel since her other one broke when we rearranged her studio a few months ago.”

As we chatted for a bit, Y/N emerged from the patio door leading to our bedroom dressed in a bright yellow sundress, the warm California sun paling in comparison. 

“Mochi,” her voice sang as she walked over to us and held her hands together underneath her chin. 

“Mochi?” Tay asked Jesse quietly. 

He kissed the side of her head. “It’s a long story.” 

Dragging my fingers up and down her bare thigh as she stood next to the chair I’d been sitting on, I gave her my full attention. 

“Yea?” 

“Could I borrow your SUV? There’s more space than my small car,” she even said the word please with her eyes.  

“Of course. You know you don’t have to ask,” I said while patting her thigh, her slowly dropping into my lap. 

She thanked me with a kiss right before the rest of them wished her a happy birthday, something she couldn't hide her excitement because the love behind her smile was evident. 

While Y/N sat in my lap, I glanced over to Tay who gave me a nod before clearing her throat while sitting up straight. 

“Do you mind if I tag along? I know it’s your birthday but I’ve been dying to check out that antique place next door to the art shop.” 

Immediately Y/N nodded while shooting up from my lap. “Yes please! I did not want to go alone.” 

I fawned a frown, pretending to be hurt that I couldn’t go with her. 

“I’m sorry, angel. I could try to reschedule my therapy appointment but we know how busy Dr. Poulos is.” 

She bent down and kissed me. “It’s alright, Noah. I need a little girl time today.” 

Knew she would take the bait.

After saying goodbye to them and making sure they were out of ear shot, I locked eyes with Jesse. 

“Still good with the plan?” 

He immediately nodded. “Everything is set up. Faye and Bryan will be here with their cameras.” 

Michael spoke next. “Everyone knows where to be here and when.” 

I nodded while rising to my feet and ran a hand through my unruly hair. “Good. I’ve got a few things to pick up in town.” 

“Mind if we tag along?” Jesse’s words mimicked Tay’s from earlier. “We’re bored just sitting here.” 

“Says you!” Michael said while rolling out of the hammock. “I’m fine hanging out at home doing absolutely nothing.” 

Leading us inside with Kuma and Salem nearly knocking me over as they barreled past us, Jesse and Michael continued to bicker about something I stopped paying attention to; mind on something else. 

“Michael, are you fine driving?” I asked while stopping in the hallway that led to my bedroom. “I need to make a few phone calls.” 

“Yeah. Twenty minutes?” 

All three of us nodded before dispersing in the house towards our respective bedrooms. The scent of Y/N still lingered in the air as I reached for my phone perched on my nightstand and as I went to pull up my texts, I noticed a voicemail notification without a missed call. 

“Hm, weird,” I muttered as I clicked open the text thread between Y/N and I. 

Me: Remember to treat yourself today, angel. You deserve whatever you want. 

Almost immediately she texted back. 

Angel 🪽: All I want is you, Noah. 

My heart soared in my chest at her words, truly thankful that everything bad in our life the last few weeks had been a dream. 

More like a nightmare. 

Me: You already have all of me. 

Just before I pocketed my phone, a new text popped up. 

Joakim Karlsson: Any chance we could meet up soon? I need to talk to you about something before tonight. 

Furrowing my brows, I typed up my response. 

Me: Sure. I’m about to head to the jewelry store on 11th street. We can meet there in about thirty minutes?

When he replied with a thumbs up emoji, I tossed my phone onto my bed and stalked into the bathroom to get ready, excitement for the day causing me to wear a wide smile. 

READER

“I am so tired,” I sighed while carrying the stacks of bags up the steps towards the house. 

Tay giggled behind me as she carried the two new canvas’ I bought. “I can’t believe we spent two hours in the antique shop!” 

Resting my hip against the front door, I adjusted the bags so I could wrap my hand around the door knob. “They had so many cute little skull trinkets! I hope Noah is fine with me littering his desk with some of them.” 

I turned to face Tay as I pushed my way inside the house and didn’t notice it was not only quiet but dark as well until a boisterous round of voices caused me to nearly drop my bags. 

“SURPRISE!” 

“MOTHER FUCKER!” I yelled while clutching my chest, gazing around the filled living room. 

Tears filled my eyes when I noticed every single one of my friends filling the house because of my birthday. They all were here for me. 

Noah stood out amongst all of them dressed in a crisp white shirt that accentuated his tattoos and black dress pants. However, since he didn’t allow shoes in the house, he was wearing a pair of bright red socks. 

He had a bouquet of flowers in one hand while the other hand was stuffed deep into his pocket. His hair had grown a bit since he skipped his last few haircuts so it was reaching his ears, even combing back like how it currently was. The chain around his neck rested softly against the white shirt. His cologne lingered in the air and the light from the lamp in the corner of the living room casted him in a bright glow; his own aura. 

Noah called me his angel but right now standing in front of me, he was my own angel. 

“Happy Birthday, Y/N.” 

Tay came up behind me and took the bags from my hand so I could step into Noah’s warm embrace, the smell of the flowers engulfing my senses. 

Violets. 

Almost immediately I was brought back to when he surprised me with an array of flowers from his belated valentines day surprise. 

“The violets, also known as the Sumire, represent life and sincerity. Its small size and delicate nature represent deep affection for someone. These flowers are very important in Japan.”

“Noah,” I choked while taking the flowers from him. “Did you do all of this?” 

The entire house was covered in balloons, streamers, and a huge banner that took up the entire wall behind the television in the living room saying HAPPY BIRTHDAY Y/N. WE ALL LOVE YOU. 

Salem and Kuma were sitting on the long evergreen couch, both wearing bright red bowties. It looked like Kuma even was groomed, his fur fresh and clean. 

“Did you give Kuma a bath?” I chuckled while swaying in Noah’s arms. 

He snorted. “Fuck no. I gladly paid the groomer $140 to take care of it. Remember the last time we tried to do that ourselves?” 

I cringed remembering exactly what happened. Kuma jumped out of the bathtub mid shampoo scrub and ran all throughout the house, leaving a wet trail in his wake. It would have been fine if he didn’t jump into Michael’s bed to roll around in it while he slept. 

Needless to say I bought Michael a new bedspread. 

“You bought Salem a new collar?” I asked. 

“His old one was faded. But I realized I should have got one for Kuma so they could match,” Noah said.

I peered around the house, taking in sight of all of my friends. Chase and Malcolm sat on the couch, both of them grinning from ear to ear; something that told me they had a surprise for me. I only knew this because Malcolm’s left eye would always twitch when he was desperate to tell me something. 

Which is what was happening right now. 

Davis, Steven, Michael, and Folio were all in the kitchen setting up the spread of food that seemed to have been just delivered before I walked in the door. 

Astrid and Jolly were sitting at the kitchen table, both having a hushed conversation amongst themselves. I raised a brow at the action of Jolly resting a hand on the side of her stomach, her giggling at something he said. 

Tay, who had set all of my belongings I bought earlier in my studio, emerged back into the living room just in time for Jesse to jump up from behind the couch to scare her. She yelped in surprise before smacking his chest repeatedly. 

“I fucking hate when you do that!” There wasn’t an ounce of venom in her voice as her laughter echoed when he picked her up to twirl her around. 

Matt had Faye wrapped into his chest as they sat on the other end of the couch, him staring at her with love in his eyes while he played with her necklace. 

But it was Nicholas who sat at the table next to Jolly and Astrid that caught my attention more than the others. 

“Birthday tattoos?!” I squealed while leading Noah over to the table. 

“It’s become our tradition, angel,” Noah chuckled while handing the flowers to Astrid, who gladly set them in a vase with water. 

Nicholas rose from the chair after pausing setting up his tattoo equipment and gave me a hug. 

“Happy birthday, Y/N.” 

I pressed my cheek to his chest, feeling so thankful for his friendship over the years. I wasn’t sure where I’d be if it wasn't for his words of wisdom in some of the darkest moments of my life. 

“Thank you, Nicholas.” I smiled while pulling away from him. 

“What are you going to get?” Faye asked from her position on the couch, wrapped underneath Matt’s arm. 

I made a mock tapping on my chin, pretending that I was thinking about it. “A duck.”

Noah choked on his drink, nearly spewing it all over his shirt, and I couldn’t help but chuckle. 

“Why a duck?” He wondered, wiping his chin. 

"Well,” I began while sitting on one of the chairs and extending my right arm towards Nicholas so he could prep the area. “According to your fanbase, they see you as a duck so I guess that’s why I’m going to get it."

The stare Noah and I shared was strong and vibrant, the aura of our connected souls radiating light in the empty air around all of us. Most of everyone here had been here since the beginning of our relationship, so we knew how much this moment meant to them. 

Noah stood behind the chair I sat on and placed a kiss on top of my head. “Well, I guess I’m getting a crow tattooed then.”

Looking back at Nicholas, I bit my lip. “Would it be too much to ask for two tattoos?” 

“It’s your birthday, Y/N. Whatever you want,” he said. 

“What else were you thinking of getting?” Jolly asked. 

With a sad sigh, I spoke quietly yet loud enough for everyone to hear. “It can’t rain all the time.” 

Noah didn’t speak, simply squeezed my shoulder for a long moment, before sitting down next to me. 

“Still have your dads letter?” Nicholas asked while finishing setting up his equipment. 

I raised a brow. “Of course I do. Why?” 

“If you want, I can copy your dad’s handwriting for the tattoo. Might take me a bit if you don’t mind waiting,” he said. 

Choking on a sob, I nodded eagerly. “Please.” 

“I’ll go grab it,” Noah pressed a kiss to the side of my head before rising from the table. 

For the next long while, everyone conversed and laughed, all of us reminiscing of old times together as Nicholas tattooed me and then Noah. I did have to chuckle because since Noah didn’t have much free skin, he had his crow tattooed on the back of his calf. Meaning we had to super sanitize our kitchen table for Noah to lay on it. 

“I can’t believe Mr. Clean Freak, who sends overly aggressive texts in the group chat about a dirty crock pot, is getting tattooed on a surface we eat on!” Michael shook his head in disbelief.

Noah shot him a glare over his shoulder. “Shut up.” 

I giggled while eating a plate of food, my two new tattoos wrapped up. The duck was a simple cartoon design with the infamous duck lips. Nicholas even added hair to it so it looked like Noah. It was on the inside of my forearm. The It Can’t Rain All The Time tattoo was done on my ribs which required me to change into something more comfortable so I wasn't lying on the couch with my dress hiked up to my breasts giving everyone a show. 

Noah made sure to follow me into our bedroom to give me my first birthday present. 

“Fuck,” I moaned while resting my head against the closed door of our room. 

Noah hummed ini delight as he knelt in front of me, his face buried between my legs. The bottom of my dress covered him so I couldn’t see as he devoured me. 

“Already so wet,” he mused before flicking his tongue against my clit and slipping in another finger, spreading them wide inside of me. 

“Noah,” I panted and grasped his hair with such force, I heard a hiss fall from his mouth. 

“Happy birthday, angel.” 

A tender kiss inside of my thigh was the only warning I received before he began devouring me again. He sucked and hummed against my clit while his fingers continued to pump in and out of me in quick succession. It was all a blur as I let my body react to Noah’s touch. I whined when his fingers slipped out of me, leaving me empty and desperate for more, only then for his tongue to spear inside of me. His moans of pleasure were downed out as I gripped his hair and pushed him farther into my center. The euphoric burn was all consuming ,every bit of my soul becoming one with Noah as he refused to let up. 

“Noah,” I panted, my orgasm teetering on the edge of explosion. 

His fingers gripped my thighs to help keep me upright against the door, nails leaving half crescent shaped moons in the tender flesh. I rode against his tongue, basking in the splendor that Noah was the only one to ever provide me. With a muffled shout behind my hand, I let go of the grip on my orgasm and allowed it to haul me into the void of white haziness, stars dancing in the corners of my vision. 

“Fuck,” Noah groaned after pulling himself away from my legs, my arousal soaking his chin and stood to his full height. 

He made no move to wipe it away.

Now, almost an hour later, I stood in the kitchen with my family as Noah finished up his tattoo, grunting about how he’s going to have to disinfect the table a few more times before anyone eats there. Chase and Malcolm were leaning against the kitchen island in front of me, excitement evident in their eyes. 

“Are you guys going to tell me what has your eye twitching?” I asked Malcolm. 

Chase hummed while looking over at him. “You know, I never noticed that before.” 

The auburn haired man rolled his eyes before handing me his phone to show me an email from our tour manager, Ethan. 

“Wait,” I stood straighter. “No fucking way!” 

My best friends and bandmates couldn’t stop smiling as I began bouncing on my feet, something Noah caught because he came over to me and wrapped an arm around my shoulder. 

“What’s going on?” He wondered. 

“Hollow Souls is playing Incarceration in a few months! Do you know how huge this is for us? We haven’t played a festival of this caliber since Warped Tour.” My voice was raised two octaves, showing my excitement. 

Jesse, who was slow dancing with Tay to the music playing, nodded. “ERRA just got asked to play.” 

“Hang on, both Hollow Souls and ERRA got asked to play but not Bad Omens?” Matt was dumbfounded as he whipped out his phone, hastily typing away. “Oh, shit.” 

Folio raised a brow while looking over Matt’s shoulder. “Dude, don’t you ever check your work email? They sent that email almost a week ago!” 

“Fuck off, I’ve been busy,” Matt shot back while playing with Faye’s necklace again. 

“So you mean to tell me,” I began while looking at all of my friends in the room, “Hollow Souls, Bad Omens, and ERRA are all playing at Incarceration?” 

Noah beamed. “Talk about a sick ass line up!” 

While I sat on the couch talking with Davis and Michael as the former told us he met someone at the bookstore the other day, I noticed Noah, Chase, and Malcolm disappear into the back yard. I wondered what their conversation was when I saw a huge smile break out on Malcolm's face while Chase stood frozen before Noah clamped a hand on his shoulder, reassuring him something. 

Later on in the evening, I found myself talking with Faye and Matt, ever curious on where her necklace came from; the one Matt could not stop touching all night. 

“Is this new?” I asked. 

Faye nodded with a huge grin plastered across her face. “Matt gave it to me last nice.” 

“It’s a pretty necklace,” I said while getting a better look at the glowing diamond in the middle. 

Matt playfully smacked my hand away. “Not just any necklace. It’s an engagement necklace.” 

Both Noah and I froze at his words, wondering if we heard him correctly. Faye smacked him upside the head, causing Matt to grumble a slew of curses. 

“I told you not to say anything, Matthew. Tonight is about Y/N, not us,” she chastised him. 

He rubbed at his head while fixing his hat. “It just slipped out.” 

“I’m sorry,” I shook my head. “Did you just say engagement necklace? Like he proposed last night?” 

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Noah asked, rubbing his hand softly over my stomach. 

Faye sighed while twirling the necklace between her fingers. “We didn’t want to steal the spotlight away from Y/N. Today is her day.” 

“FUCK THAT!” I yelled, causing everyone to stare at us. “Whoops sorry. Keep doing what you guys are doing.” 

I didn’t want to be the one who dropped the news of their engagement. That was their business to tell. 

Keeping my voice quiet now, I pulled Faye and Matt into a giant group hug. “I’m so happy for you two!” 

“Gross,” Matt groaned when I left a kiss on his cheek. “I don’t need your Noah slobber all over me.” 

Right before I began talking with them, Noah had pulled me into the hallway right outside our bedroom to give me my second birthday present to which we ended up making out against the wall when Matt caught us. 

“What is this?” I asked Noah as he placed a black velvet box in my hand. 

My heart was beating rapidly in my chest when he motioned towards my hand. 

“That’s the whole point of a gift, angel. You need to open it,” he urged me again almost impatiently. 

“Alright, alright,” I smacked his hand away when he tried to open it for me. 

The box creaked open and I gasped when I saw the silver locket and chain standing out against the black silk it rested on. Angel was engraved on the front of the locket and when I opened it, tears welled in my eyes. 

One side had a picture of Noah with Salem and Kuma. On the other side was a picture of my dad. 

“Mochi,” I cried while looking up at him. “I-I-.” 

Words were foreign, emotions overtaking me from how thoughtful this gift was. 

Noah brushed away my tears with his lips, kissing me down to my neck. “I love you so fucking much, Y/N. You wear this and we will always be with you, no matter how near or far.” 

His gentle hands worked on clasping the locket behind my neck, resting just above the other necklace he gifted me for my previous birthday.” 

"This engagement necklace is so pretty!" I smiled at Faye, holding the necklace between my fingers and adding the correct word now since Matt corrected me a minute ago. 

Noah stood behind me, his arms around my waist as I was pulled close into his chest. He'd been so soft and wanted to touch me any chance he could since we woke up this morning, not that I was complaining. It was nice to feel so wanted. 

So loved. 

His warm breath fanned over my ear. "I love you." 

I smiled over my shoulder at him, leaving a tender kiss on his cheek. "I love you more."

Faye's voice brought my attention back to her and I shook my head. "I'm sorry, what did you say?"

Faye's smile was so wide that it reached her eyes. "I can't believe Matt proposed with the Evenstar necklace!" 

My brows furrowed while playing with my locket. "The what now?" 

"From Lord of the Rings," Faye answered, like it should have been common knowledge. 

I sucked in a breath. "I-uh-never actually seen any of the Lord of The Rings movies." 

All noise in the house seized, so eerily quiet you could hear a pin drop and Noah's grip around me loosened so he could stand in front of me now. There was a look of disbelief on his face. 

His wasn't the one I was looking at, however. It was Matt who looked like I just ripped out his heart and stomped on it. 

"Y/N," Matt held a hand over his chest. "Please tell me you're lying." 

"Oh no," I cringed. "Are we not best friends anymore?"

Noah ran a hand over his face. "I cannot believe we've been dating for over a year and I'm just now finding out you've never seen one of my favorite movie series." 

I could see the faint smile hiding behind his hand. 

"I've never been interested in those movies," I shrugged. 

Wrong answer. 

An uproar sounded in the house as Noah tossed me over his shoulder, carrying me into the living room. Matt's voice booming behind me. 

"Davis! Load them up now. We're having a movie marathon for Y/N's birthday."

Noah pulled me down to the couch with him, immediately wrapping his arms around my midsection to pull me into his chest. I was already warm from drowning in his hoodie and a pair of Hollow Souls joggers so his extra body heat was like a blanket covering both of us. As Davis clicked through Noah’s Fandango account on the television, I glanced over to Jolly who was helping Astrid sit on the couch. All evening he’d been extra attentive to her, constantly asking if she needed anything or keeping a hand on her stomach. She took the glass of water from him with a kiss of thanks just before he sat next to her. 

That’s weird. Astrid always has a glass of wine at these get-togethers. 

I let out a gasp when the realization hit me and smacked a hand over my mouth so I didn’t catch the attention of the others around me. Noah, however, did catch on and I felt him press a kiss to my cheek. 

“They want to tell you, angel. But they’re afraid of how you’ll react.” 

Sad eyes stared down at Noah since I was still seated on his lap. “What do you mean? You knew?” 

“Jolly told me this morning. He wanted my opinion on how to bring it up to you because of your endometriosis. They don't want to make it seem like they’re rubbing it in,” Noah explained while rubbing my back. 

My heart immediately sank to the depths of my stomach, hurt digging into my system but not for the reason others thought. But because my best friends couldn’t tell me they were pregnant without the fear of upsetting me. 

Leaving Noah with a kiss, I stood from the couch and extended my hand towards Astrid, who glanced at me with confusion. Jolly’s gaze bounced between us with slight hesitation. 

“Don’t worry. I’ll bring her back to you,” I ruffled his hair.

“Where are you going?” Matt asked while pointing to the television. “We’re about to start with the first Hobbit!” 

Rolling my eyes at him, I pulled Astrid off of the couch. “Give me five minutes, thotblaster. Then you can strap me down so I have no choice but to watch these movies.” 

With my hand in hers, I led Astrid to my art studio and made sure the door was closed behind us. Her white hair with slightly overgrown roots was pulled back into a tight braid and the light behind her eyes was slowly flickering. 

“Are you doing alright? I know you wanted to meet up to talk earlier,” I said while we both sat on the couch I had in the room. 

Astrid hesitated for a moment, gnawing on her bottom lip and began rubbing her hands up and down on her jeans. “Noah told you?” 

“I picked it up on my own. I’m quite perceptive,” I joked with a sly smile before grasping her hands to hold them in my lap. “Astrid, please know you do not have to hide something like this from me in fear of how I’ll react.” 

She nodded with wet eyes. “We just found out last night. It wasn’t planned and if I’m being honest, things with Jolly haven’t been great the last few weeks. Part of me is afraid this will push him away more than bring us closer together.” 

“I don’t think so. From what I’ve seen tonight, he hasn’t been able to keep his hands off of you. Come to think of it, Noah’s been acting the same way since he woke up this morning.” I waved her off, getting distracted. “But my point is, you two deserve this. This group needs a little one of us running around. And it being a little mini mix of you and Jolly is a plus.” 

Astrid laughed through her tears. “You’re not mad?” 

My eyes widened. “Mad? Why would I be mad? I’m fucking ecstatic. I’ve come to terms a long time ago that kids aren’t in the cards for me. This is something both Noah and I have spent many nights coming to terms with. We’re more than alright being the fun uncle and aunt of the group.” 

She wrapped her arms around me in a tight embrace, almost knowing that deep down my heart was breaking for not being able to have something I desperately wished for. 

“In time, you and Noah will find a way to leave your love so it can carry on,” Astrid assured me. 

Over her voice, another seemed to speak quietly in my ear; a voice I hadn’t heard in years. 

It’s okay. 

TAY

With a yawn, I buried myself deeper into the blankets on my bed while browsing through the adoption site on my phone. It was a long day of shopping with Y/N and then her surprise birthday party. The second I stepped foot into my apartment, I made a beeline for the shower and then immediately jumped into bed. Jesse emerged from the bathroom across the hall from my bedroom and turned the light off with a soft click. For a long moment, the dogs that were up for adoption were a forgotten thought as I tracked my eyes over the tattoos that littered Jesse’s bare torso; the ones I spent many nights kissing. 

“Like what you see?” He teased while tying back the curls from his face before climbing into bed with me. 

“Very much so,” I grinned while plugging in my phone and snuggled closer into his warm chest. 

We lay there as a rerun of Ghost Adventures played on the television and I dragged my nail over the tiger tattoo across his stomach. 

“Everything alright?” Jesse questioned while brushing his lips over my forehead. 

I sighed while giving a limp shrug. “Why do you let me look at dogs for adoption when I cant get one because this stupid apartment doesn’t allow it?” 

“Is it the same husky?” His hand dragged up and down my spine, causing shivers to cover my skin. 

“Yeah,” I pouted while looking up at him. “She’s all white with bright blue eyes! And her name is Sky. How cool would it be to name her Skyline?!” 

He chuckled at my excitement. “It would be cute.” 

Kicking my feet in another pout, I buried my face in the crook of his neck to breathe in his familiar scent. The last four months with him had been a whirlwind of emotions. I’d have my fair share of terrible relationships so when we started dating it was like a breath of fresh air. Jesse showed me how I deserved to be treated and if he could, I knew he’d give me the moon and stars in a necklace so I could walk around with them all the time.  

My heart beat wildly in my chest when Jesse hooked my leg over his hips to pull me closer to him. 

“You’re too far away from me, darlin,” he whispered. 

Giggling, I pressed a kiss to his chest. “Can you tell me something so I stop thinking about the poor husky in the cold and dark shelter?” 

“What do you want to know?” 

Suddenly my head snapped up so I could stare down at him. “Tell me where the hell Mochi came from?” 

Jesse sucked in a breath. “Can’t do that. I promised Noah I’d take that to the grave.”

I batted my bright eyes at him while jutting out my bottom lip. “Please?” 

Wrapping his arm around me, Jesse hooked his other arm behind his head. “Alright, so it started when Hollow Souls and Bad Omens were touring together a couple years ago.” 

NOAH 

I bounced on the soles of my feet, excitedly waiting for Y/N to arrive. My one gloved hand was shoved deep in my coat pocket while the other was out as I stared down at the makeup that went into making it look old and wrinkled; along with my face. We never had plans to make a music video for Just Pretend but with how it blew up over night on Tik Tok and we realized how much people love the song, we knew it had to be done. 

Just Pretend was mine and Y/N’s song, something that was meant for the two of us. But my mind immediately began to run with ideas on how we could make the music video work for our Concrete Jungle universe. Thankfully, she was on board with the entire idea even though she was a bit worried about her being in the music video with me. 

“It’s just your arm and bracelet, angel. No one will see your face.”

“Five minutes, Noah!”

Glancing over my shoulder towards Erik, I nodded. “Y/N’s almost here.” 

Erik Rojas nodded with a sly smile before looking back at the computer monitor, going over what we had shot yesterday with the younger couple in the music video. I worked from 8 in the morning to nearly midnight and by the time I got home and crawled into bed next to Y/N, she was fast asleep. This morning, I left even earlier with a kiss to her forehead. For nearly six hours, I sat in a chair so the make up department could age me by sixty years. 

Y/N had plans with Matt this morning, something about him needing her for something top secret that not even I knew. When I tried to ask her about it in our earlier texts, she simply sent a gif of someone locking their lips. 

“Well, who’s this handsome fellow?” 

Turning on my heels, my heart soared into my chest when I saw Y/N walk through the door of the building we were shooting the video in, her usual glow behind her; one that I immediately noticed was muted gray, darkness creeping in. 

“Are you alright?” I questioned while cupping her cheek with my gloved hand. 

Her face faltered, only for a moment, before she gave me a bright yet forced smile. 

“Please don’t lie to me,” I sighed. “What’s wrong?” 

Y/N nodded in my grasp. “The endo pain is bad today. But I’ll be okay.”

“Angel,” I sighed while rubbing a thumb just under her eye. “We can reschedule. I don’t want you to force yourself  to work.” 

“I promise,” Y/N’s finger hooked in the belt loop of my pants to bring me closer to her, resting her chin on my chest while looking up at me. “I’ll be fine. But you know what will help?” 

I raised a brow, as best as I could underneath all of the prosthetics. “What’s that?” 

“Ice cream on the way home tonight,” her eyes shined. 

With a chuckle, I pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “Whatever you want, angel.”

We stayed in this position for a little bit, ignoring everyone around us as they set up the next scene of the music video. Having her in my arms felt like my soul was home 

“So this is what old Noah looks like, huh?” She tapped my wrinkled cheek before scrunching up her face in disgust at the large premade stain of my white shirt. “How bad is it bothering you that you can’t wash that?” 

I groaned while letting my eyes shut. “So bad.”

We both shared a laugh as I brought her into my embrace, catching her wrist with my gloved hand. “Did you wear your bracelet?” 

Motioning towards her caught wrist, I pulled down the sleeve of her jacket to see the silver chain around her. 

“I never take it off, Noah. You know that.”

It was true. 

Y/N wore the bracelet and necklace all the time, never taking it off. Even when she showered. She said it was a way to have me with her when I wasn’t. 

Holding her close, I breathed in her familiar scent of peaches. “Does this old man get a kiss from his best girl?” 

Y/N hummed while stepping on the tips of her toes and brushed a kiss across my lips. It was one that was barely felt, gone before it registered in my brain. She was teasing me because of what I’d done to her this morning. While I was saying goodbye, I brushed my fingers over her slick folds underneath the blanket teasing her clit a few times before slipping out of the bedroom. She fell asleep naked last night, something we both did often. Mostly because of wanting the intimacy of feeling our skin against each other. We rarely did it for anything sexual. Sure there were times we woke up in the middle of the night wanting to be connected but I’d rather have the spiritual connection of having our bodies pressed up against each other. 

“Angel,” I began but she was swiftly called over by the make up department, needing to get her ready for her part of the music video. 

Giving them a nod, she turned back towards me to ruffle my hair. “I’ll see you in a bit, mochi.” 

She slipped through my fingers like a ghost, further creating distance between me; physically and spiritually. Ever since my dreamstate, I’d been feeling this undeniable urge to make sure Y/N knew how much she meant to me. I needed to prove to her that I’d do whatever it took to make sure she was loved and cared for until her last breath. 

Not only because of the dreamstate but because of Matt and Faye getting engaged and Jolly and Astrid news of becoming parents soon, it seemed to put my ass in gear. I was done floating along with my relationship. I couldn’t put this off any longer. It was burning a hole in Michael’s top dresser drawer. 

“Noah, you ready?” One of the assistants helping out Erik called over to me from his position next to the old chair surrounded by monitors. 

“One second,” I said while pulling out my phone and clicking on the ‘House Boy’s’ group chat. 

Me: What time is our studio session on Friday?

Michael: We’re booked from 12-5. Think it’ll be enough time?

Me: Should be. We just need to track yours and Y/N’s vocal’s. Chase said we can use their studio to mix everything. 

Jesse: I don’t know how you managed to talk Y/N into being a cover on the OST. 

I snickered at that, remembering how persistent I was in trying to get her to agree. I’d brought it up to her the other night at dinner when I caught her and Michael singing together. Chief was already a planend feature on the CJ OST but we’d been trying to find a perfect female voice that would match well with Michael’s. 

Y/N was apprehensive at first when I asked if she wanted to do it only because we were still pretty private with our relationship, not making it public knowledge yet. But I assured her that we shouldn’t care what people think about that aspect. Hollow Souls being a feature on Bad Omens next album would be huge. 

Michael: It’s because I’m just so handsome. 

Me: 😒

Jesse: Honestly, that makes a lot of sense if you think about it. 

Me: I hate you guys so fucking much. 

Michael: That’s a weird way to say I love you. 

Jesse: SMOOCHES! 

Rolling my eyes at them with a slight chuckle, I pocketed my phone and shifted into work mode by spending the next little while filming my part of the video; finger pressing the button of the remote in my hand and clawing at the tube in my throat. It was pretty easy and went smoothly. By the time I finished, Y/N had returned dressed in a white cardigan sweater and her left arm done with the special effect make-up, her bracelet sparking under the low light of the set as I sat up from the chair. 

“I still think we should have aged you by sixty years so we could match,” I joked as she reached me. 

“Will you read to me by the ocean when I’m old and gray?” She teased while pulling me closer by my own sweater to press a kiss to my lips.  

“Until our last dying breath,” I vowed with all the seriousness in my voice. 

Our eyes met in a fiery trance, neither of us wanting to break it first and the longer we stared at each other, I could see the light slowly beginning to ignite behind hers once again. 

“Are you ready for your big moment?” I asked as we began walking down the long hallway towards the made up hospital room where Y/N would be. 

She snorted while linking our fingers together, hands beginning to sway between us. “All I have to do is lay there while the doctors try to save my life. Just show the bracelet and make sure it looks pretty.” 

I pulled us to a stop in the hallway, twirling her around and pulling her into my chest; her laughter echoing all around us. 

“That shouldn’t be too hard for you because you’re always pretty,” I winked before capturing her lips into a kiss. 

It was slow, both of us taking our time tasting each other, and Y/N hummed into my mouth when my tongue brushed against her bottom lip. 

“GET A ROOM!” Bryan’s voice called from down the hall before we heard the rapid clicking of his camera. 

Flipping him off, I pressed another kiss to Y/N’s lips and held her close to my chest while looking at Bryan, who snapped another picture of us. 

“Cool if I get shots of you in the bed?” He asked Y/N. 

She nodded before looking up at me. “Are you all finished for the day?” 

“Almost. I just need the shot of me walking down the hallway to your room.” 

“Perfect,” Y/N kissed my chin. “I can’t wait for the ice cream.” 

She walked away from me but halted, turning swiftly on her feet to face me again. “What movie are we on tonight?” 

I chuckled while stuffing my hands in the pockets of my pants. “Two Towers. Matt is going to want to do the extended version.” 

Back on her birthday, we watched all three Hobbit movies and last night we watched Fellowship of The Ring together; something Matt made known how upset he was that we watched it without him. So we promised we’d go over to his and Faye’s place tonight to watch the next one. 

Y/N rolled her eyes with an over the top sigh. “I guess since he’s my best friend that’s okay.” 

Erik popped his head out of the hospital room. “We’re ready for you, Y/N.” 

Witha thumbs up, she ran back over to me with a playful smirk. “I can’t get over how good you look.” 

She breathed over my lips before pushing away from me and following Erik into the room at the end of the hall. 

With a cheeky smile, I walked back towards where I was previously sitting in the chair with the monitors around me. The plan was for me to wake up from my memory core dreaming when the memory of my younger love was dying and follow the doctors down the hall to where old Y/N was laying in the bed dying. 

Thank Hades my dreamstate didn’t end up like that. 

MICHAEL

“I'm not afraid of the war you've come to wage against my sins. I'm not okay but I can try my best to just pretend.” 

Y/N cringed while adjusting the headset over her ears. “Can we maybe turn my voice down? I feel like I might be too loud.”

I nodded while adjusting the necessary buttons before speaking into the microphone that echoed into the recording booth. “Try now.”

Noah sat next to me, watching Y/N with adoration in his eyes as she sang the opening part of Just Pretend again; for the third time. We were in the studio for the last three hours and I finished recording my vocal parts a while ago. Y/N wanted to make sure her vocal take was perfect because this song meant so much to her. 

“That shirt looks familiar,” Jolly spoke while motioning towards the shirt Y/N was wearing as he walked into the studio with a tray full of coffees from Fika.

“I haven’t seen her wear the shirt since our zoo day,” Noah said while taking a long sip of his coffee. 

How did he not burn his throat?

As Y/N continued to track her vocals, getting lost in the lyrics, I moved my head back and forth while quietly signing it along with her. Matt sat on the other side of me as we both conversed ideas on how to make the track once Y/N was finished. Noah’s knee couldn't stop bouncing as he kept his gaze between his phone and Y/N.

“She sounds really good, huh?” He mused with a goofy smile on his face. 

“Y/N and Noah sitting in a recording booth. K-I-S-S-I-. Ow, mother fucker!” I yelled, rubbing my arm after he punched me. 

“Noah Sebastian! What have I said about hurting our friends?” Y/N’s yelled at him through the booth. 

He pointed to me. “He started it!” 

Rolling my eyes, I pressed the button for the microphone in the booth. “Did you want to take a break?” 

She shook her head. “I want to do one more run through. I feel like I can get my voice a bit higher.”

Matt nodded while throwing his finger in a circle. “Let’s go for one more run.”

Furious typing out of the corner of my eye made me look over to Noah, who was clearly trying to keep his composure. 

“It’s going to be fine, Noah,” I assured him quietly. “You don’t have to worry.”

He looked away from his phone, knee still bouncing with anticipation, and did his best to nod. “I know. It’s just killing me not being there.”

“Jesse told you to trust him. So trust him,” I reminded Noah of our conversation with Jesse this morning. 

Noah pinched his eyes shut and let out an aggravated groan. “I still haven't heard from the realtor. I’m freaking out.” 

Jolly rested his hand on Noah’s shoulder. “You can’t rush something like this, Noah. You just need to be patient.”

Chase and Malcolm sat on the couch behind me and they were snickering about something which caused me to spin in my chair to face them with a raised brow. 

“Something funny love birds?” I teased. 

Chase ran a hand over his buzzed head, still snickering about something. “We tried to reassure Noah when we talked to him at Y/N’s birthday that there’s nothing to worry about.” 

Malcolm spoke next, bumping his knee with Chase’s. “It’s just funny to see Mochi freaking about little details when we all know she doesn't care about that kind of stuff” 

“I swear to god,” Noah grumbled with narrowed eyes. “I fucking hate when you guys call me that.” 

Our conversation ceased when the door behind Noah opened, Y/N stepping out of the sound booth. 

“What are you guys talking about that have all of you in a serious mood? No one is even paying attention to my record,” she pouted her lips. 

Matt raised his hand. “I was paying attention.” 

“Kiss ass,” Jolly snorted while handing Y/N her coffee. “Astrid made yours with another shot of espresso.” 

She widened her eyes before taking a tentative sip. “Is she trying to keep me up all night or something?” 

All of us shared a quick look and then Matt packed up his things, slinging his backpack over his shoulder. “Alright, losers. I’m out of here. I’m meeting Faye after she finishes up her shoot with some clients at the pier.” 

This caused Y/N to perk up. “Did you remember-?”

Matt waved his hand with a loud shush before ruffling her hair. “I’ll text you later with the details.” 

Noah pulled Y/N down to his lap. “You two have been really secretive the last couple of days.” 

She tapped his nose. “Not my business to tell, mochi bean.” 

We all laughed while waving goodbye to Matt and Jolly, I eased back into my chair while looking at my watch. 

“We still have the studio for an hour. Feel confident with what we have?” I asked. 

Noah rested a hand on her thigh. “It’s up to you, angel. Bad Omens and Chief got what we needed.” 

She glanced over to Chase and Malcolm. “What do you guys think?” 

Malcolm tucked a curly piece of auburn hair behind his ear. “I think we got what we needed. But it’s up to you, sweets.” 

As the three of them talked, Noah’s glittering gaze lingering on the side of Y/N’s face, I pulled out my phone from my pocket when I felt it vibrate twice. 

Jesse Cash: All set. 

Jesse Cash: No thanks to me, though. Tay did everything. I was just here to make sure she didn’t fall off the ladder. 

Letting out a low cough, I got Noah’s attention and gave him a small nod. 

He sucked in a large breath before tapping Y/N’s thigh. “Why don’t you give it one more go? Just to make sure it’s perfect. I know how much of a perfectionist you are.” 

She rolled her eyes and kissed his forehead. “You’re the one to talk! But you’re right. You don’t mind waiting around for me?” 

This is where phase one starts. 

“I should get home to let Kuma out. Jesse and Tay have been gone all day, along with us,” Noah said. 

Y/N pouted but nodded. “I’ll get a ride home from Michael.” 

“No can do. I’ve got a date after this,” I informed. 

I didn’t. It was a lie to set up phase two. 

“We’ll give you a ride home, sweets,” Chase spoke up. 

After she gave Noah a quick kiss, Y/N walked back into the booth leave the four of us alone again. 

I pointed to him. “Don’t go snooping.” 

“Trust me, I don’t need to know what you have hiding in your dresser,” Noah shivered while gathering his things and blowing a kiss to Y/N. 

“Good luck, mochi bean!” Chase called after him. 

CHASE

“Oh my god, Chase. Why are you driving so slow!” Y/N whined from the backseat of the car. “I’m tired and want to get home to my boys!” 

I tapped my fingers along the steering wheel with the beat from the radio as I slowly glided along the familiar roads leading to her house. We were waiting for a text from Noah giving us the thumbs up and with us being a few blocks away with no text, I had to do whatever I could to buy some time. 

“You know, sweets,” Malcolm turned slightly in the passenger seat so he could look back at her when I stilled the car at a red light. “We miss you. We just want to spend some time with you.” 

In the rearview mirror, I saw a slight frown pull on Y/N’s lips. 

“I miss you guys too,” she sighed. “Maybe next weekend I can spend the weekend at your place. Like old times?” 

“We’d like that,” Malcolm said. 

I spoke up next, locking eyes with her in the rearview mirror. “We’re proud of you, Y/N. With all the hell you overcame the last couple of years. There were moments we thought we would lose you but you pushed through because you’re strong.”

Her bottom lip trembled as Malcolm continued where I left off. “We love you, sweets. You’re a sister to me and would do anything to keep you safe even if you don’t need us anymore.” 

“I do need you guys,” her eyes were wet with tears. “You guys have kept me safe from the start of Hollow Souls. You were there when I needed a shoulder to cry on because of Trey and when I found myself in that darkness after the hotel room with Noah, you two brought light when I needed it most. I owe you guys my life.” 

I rubbed my nose, hoping to hide the sniffle because I didn’t want to show my emotions in front of them. I’d always been the strong one between us three. I needed to be. 

A loud horn sounded behind my car causing all three of us to jump so with a breath, I began to drive again, still at the pace from before. 

“I can’t believe you guys have me crying,” Y/N chuckled while brushing away her tears. 

Malcolm snorted. “You say that like you’re not already a big baby.” 

The two of them began to fight in the car which caused me to push away their hands while trying to drive. 

“Knock it off kids! Don’t make me turn this car around,” I warned. 

Laughter filled the car as a new text came through to Malcolms phone, him peering down at it. 

“We’re good,” he mouthed. 

Putting a little more weight to my foot, I let the car increase in speed as we reached Y/N’s house in a matter of minutes. 

THIRD PERSON POV

Waving goodbye to Chase and Malcolm, Y/N walked up the steps towards the house with her keys in her hand. All of the lights were off which made her pause momentarily because she thought at least Noah was home. When she reached the door, a bright green sticky note caught her eye immediately. 

Follow the trail.

A quiet squeal fell from her lips when she realized what was going on. It was like their redo date all over again. The sun was slowly starting to set so she barely had enough light to see the violet petals guiding her to the side of the house where on the gate of the fence was another note. 

I'm so afraid that the walls that I have made have locked me in.

Y/N’s brows furrowed as she picked off the sticky note and continued to follow the trail of violet petals into their backyard where she saw yet another sticky note on the shed that housed all of their gardening equipment. 

I'm not okay but I can try my best to just pretend. So will you wait me out until I let you down? So will you wait me out until I let you down?

The familiar lyrics pulled on her heart strings, having just recorded her version a few hours ago. Just Pretend was her and Noah’s song, a way they can be bound together for the rest of their days. A way to show others how strong their love for one another is. 

Yet again following the trail of petals deeper into the back yard, her eyes locked in on a bright green sticky note on the concrete patio. 

I can wait for you at the bottom. I can stay away if you want me to. I can wait for years if I've gotta. Heaven knows I ain't getting over you. 

Soft acoustic notes played throughout the vastness of their backyard causing Y/N to snap her head up from reading the note to see Noah clad in a black sweater, joggers, jacket, and beanie, blending into the growing darkness of the night. However he was illuminated by the bright fairy lights that were connected from tree to tree, basking him in an angelic glow. 

He sat on a pillow that was laid on a pile of blankets with a guitar perched in his lap, fingers strumming a few notes before his voice broke through the space between them. 

I'm so afraid.

That the walls that I have made have locked me in.

I'm not okay.

But I can try my best to just pretend.

Choking on a breath, Y/N stood a few feet in front of him with her hand grasping at the two necklaces over her original Bad Omens shirt; the one she wore during their zoo day years ago.

So will you wait me out until I let you down?

So will you wait me out until I let you down?

Noah sang with his eyes shut, finding himself deep within the lyrics. His heart was beating so fast in his chest, he was afraid that it would burst through, leaving a bloody mess in front of Y/N. He wanted to give her his heart for the rest of his life just not in that gruesome kind of way. 

I can wait for you at the bottom.

I can stay away if you want me to.

I can wait for years if I've gotta.

Heaven knows I ain't getting over you.

Y/N took four large steps towards Noah and knelt down in front of him on the pile of blankets. There was a roaring fire blazing heat next to them and she saw a bead of sweat drip down the exposed skin of neck peeking through his sweater. Although she couldn’t tell if it was because of the heat or nerves. 

I know the pain.

That you hide behind the smile on your face.

And not a day.

Goes by that I don't wish it'd go away.

From the moment he saw Y/N walk off the Hollow Souls tour bus that day a few years ago, he knew she would hold his soul forever. They would be bound by that string that would tug when they were apart or pulsate when they were close by. 

So will you wait me out until I let you down?

So will you wait me out until I let you down?

There were moments Y/N would wake up from nightmares of when she walked out of the hotel room, leaving broken Noah behind. She vowed every time she woke up from one of those nightmares that she would continue to prove to Noah that she deserves him. 

I can wait for you at the bottom.

I can stay away if you want me to.

I can wait for years if I gotta.

Heaven knows I ain't getting over you.

Can we try again?

When we're not so different.

Can we make amends?

Why can't we just pretend?

Noah shifted a bit in his spot on the blankets and opened his eyes to see Y/N with tears in hers and he desperately wanted to wipe them away. He hated when she would cry. Hell, he hated whenever she was in pain whether it was emotional or physical. When she was dealing with terrible endo pains a few days ago, Noah made her a fort of blankets on the couch with her heating pad and snacks galore. They watched all of her favorite movies all day while he gently rubbed away the cramps from her lower abdomen. 

He would do whatever it took to make sure she didn’t live the rest of her days in pain. 

Weigh down on me, stay 'til morning.

Way down, would you say I'm worthy?

Weigh down on me, stay 'til morning.

Way down, would you say I'm worthy?

They both were so lost in the haze of Noah’s angelic voice that Y/N hadn’t noticed the patio door behind her slide open just a hair.

I can wait for you at the bottom.

I can stay away if you want me to.

I can wait for years if I gotta.

Heaven knows I ain't getting over you.

As Noah poured out his love for Y/N, memories of their album release party played in his mind. When they were desperate to find each other that night, desperate for their souls to connect as one again while being guided by someone that had been trying to set them up from the beginning. 

Can we try again?

When we're not so different.

Can we make amends?

Why can't you just.

Y/N was desperate to touch him but was so afraid of breaking him from the trance. She’d never heard this version of Just Pretend and the rawness of the lyrics along with Noah’s vocal’s brought even more tears to her eyes. As Noah sang the last few lines, his eyes opened fully for the first time, immediately locking with hers. 

Weigh down on me, stay 'til morning

Way down, would you say I'm worthy?

Weigh down on me, stay 'til morning

Way down, would you say I'm worthy?

Both were silent for a long moment, Noah setting the guitar down next to them on the blankets before pulling her into his arms. 

“I love you, Y/N,” he proclaimed into her hairline. 

She desperately grasped at his sweater, needing to feel him close. “I love you too, Noah. I’ve never heard that version before.” 

Pulling away from her a bit, those dark amber eyes peered down at her and brushed away strands of hair from her face. He marveled the way the freckles across her nose seemed to stand out amongst the fairy lights dancing above. 

“I wrote it back when we weren’t talking, after that night in the hotel. I was in a dark place and it showed in those lyrics. But now, I feel like you deserve to hear it. I need those lyrics to have new meaning. Something good.” 

Their lips collided in a kiss fueled by so much power, it made her nearly falter in Noah’s embrace so he laid Y/N down on the pile of blankets softly. She let herself fall into him, his tongue overpowering hers as he deepened the kiss. His hips pressed into hers causing her to moan into the kiss. 

“Noah,” she breathed. 

“I love you so fucking much. I need to prove it to you, angel. Please? Will you let me?” He begged while leaving harsh bites along the tender skin across her neck. 

Her nails scratched at the ink underneath his sweater. “You have, Noah. You always have.” 

Noah’s teeth nipped and sucked at her bottom lip while his hand began to guide her shirt up over her stomach, ready to pull it off of her but a blur of fur nearly toppled over them. 

“Oh, fuck. Kuma! Who let you out,” Noah groaned while sitting back on his knees, fixing the beanie on his head that became askew from his make out session with Y/N. 

She giggled while still laying on the blanket and peering up at Kuma, scratching at his chin and neck. 

“Hi baby. I know I missed you too,” her infectious laughter echoed in the back yard as Kuma pawed at her. 

Suddenly her hand brushed up against the new bright teal collar around Kuma’s neck, her gasping before snapping her gaze over towards Noah, who was silent. His eyes were on fire, vibrant with his tears, and a slight smile on his kiss bruised lips. 

After shooing Kuma away, Noah pressed himself to Y/N again so he could feel her close as she spoke in his ear. Professing her undying love, support, adoration, and praise. She agreed to Noah’s words, giving him every part of her until her last breath. His hands raked over every inch of her body, tracing it to memory, before sliding the shirt up over her head while she helped him out of his joggers. 

That night underneath the fairy lights and Noah’s soft vocals echoed in the air, inking on their skin, their souls merged as one. The invisible string binding them together in a knot so fierce, not even the fire blazing next to them could burn it away. 

One look at Y/N eyes and Noah would cave in. One taste of the life they could possibly have together made them both crave it. Both of them were in over their heads when they found each other but now, they knew what they needed. They needed something beautiful to shine through the darkness of their lives. They both needed this miracle. 

[fashionteahouse]

out of your league - paul x reader

AN: thank you so much for all of the love and support for fourteen entire parts of this story ! hugs and kisses, xoxo

Nervously biting your lip, you waited for the phone to answer your call. The wrinkled napkin was even more wrinkled and you hoped that the slightly smudged numbers were accurate to the ones that you have digitally imputed.

A man picks up the phone, asking who this person is calling him for.

"Hi. Can I speak to John?" you say, trying to rid your voice of any type of nervousness.

"This is he. Wait.. I know this voice... Let me think, don't say it. I will get it right....Y/N? Right?" he says.

You chuckle and confirm. He asks you how you've been. Fall is starting soon and your schedule was clear enough to give him a phone call.

"So, I'm really glad that you called. I really think I should introduce you to somebody that you will go crazy for." he explains.

"Mhm." you say as he then continues after he hears your acknowledgment.

"I think you both will go crazy for each other actually. Both of your minds seem to be a lot alike. I showed him your work and he found the other work that you have posted, he like went crazy." he says and chuckles as you join in.

"So. Have you been to New York before?" he asks.

"Never." you say almost in shock. That was the very place you would love to go. Art seemed endless there.

"All I need is for you to tell me you would like to visit and a ticket will be in your email inbox before the leaves touch the ground." he says and you take a moment to think.

Paul wasn't there at the moment, making his rounds with Sam.

"Yes, I would love to but-"

"Good! I'll uh.. keep in touch and I'll see you soon." he says, his voice being much lighter since you somewhat accepted such an offer. He saw so much potential and wanted to introduce you into a deeper world.

The line goes dead as you rack your brain of how this conversation could go.

As the fork clinked against the plate, Paul chuckled to himself as he swallowed his food. He finally takes his eyes that were on his plate and directs them to your pupils.

"You must have to either tell me something or you want something."

You playfully roll your eyes, "If I want something, you know what I would do." you tell him. He gives you a look that makes you blush but you quickly recoup yourself before things go too far off track.

"Don't freak out please." you tell him carefully as your held your own fork.

He glanced at the dish that you served him, it was one of his favorites. You barely cooked it because you expressed how tedious it was. He thought you found the lost time.

"I wont freak out if its bad." he decides.

Knowing you're not going to get the promise you wanted, you nod as you just let the words roll off of your tongue.

"I'm going to New York soon."

"When?" he says immediately back.

"Soon, before the fall."

Smiling a bit but no intent of humor, he is a bit taken aback.

"That's... very close." he says.

"I just found out today while you were gone." you say defensively.

He doesn't say much as he furrows his eyebrows and looks back down at his plate. He's thinking.

"What are you thinking about?" you softly ask as you place a touch on his hand.

"Nothing."

"Liar." you say in a hushed tone.

"How long are you going to be gone?" he asks.

You slowly shrug, feeling a bit shameful for not knowing the definite answer. You felt it was a bit childish.

"And you accepted- wait. Who is in New York again?" he then asks.

"The guy who bought my painting." you explain.

"Oh." he drags out as he scrapes the last remainder of food that was on his plate, bringing it to his mouth, saying it as if he pieced the final piece to a puzzle.

"Do you think Sam will let you go?" you ask as you fold a napkin, over creasing it.

"Sure he would. If hell froze over." he answers.

"Plus, you don't know how long you're going to be gone." he says with his hands out.

Looking down, "I don't know, I thought you would think this is a good opportunity for me." you voice out.

"Y/N, it is. There's just no way in hell he's going to let me go miles and miles away from La Push for god knows how long." he says, if you didn't pay attention, you would’ve missed that there was a hint of somberness in his voice.

Getting up from your seat, his head is now in your arms as you hold it against your stomach. "I really wish you could come."

He doesn't say anything for some time but his arm fits snug around your waist. Once you are about to let him go, he surprises you with, "You're going far. I know I can't go. Can you at least ask someone to go with you?"

You intake a breath for a response but he adds in, "I would feel better knowing someone is going with you at least."

"I can see but..." you say giving him a knowing look. Sam admitted to checking up on Emily while doing errands. It was comical to think they would be able to handle being without each other for long.

He laughs a little, "I know."

"The idea of someone being with me doesn't sound bad, you know. You have to promise me to come with me the next time I go back." you tell him.

He leans up as you lean down, "Deal." he agrees. Instead of shaking on it, you both touch lips on it.

Another day came around as you woke up in bed alone. Covers were tucked tight with you, Paul didn't want you to be cold due to your lack of clothing. The weather was starting to show signs of change. The summer wave is blending into an end. You really had to wear a jacket for temperature purposes and not by fashionable choice.

Sliding it on, you closed the front door as you made you way to return the rest of your checked out books to the local library. You brought the almost finished Wuthering Heights, texting Bella since it was a public place.

"I'm at the library. I wanted to give you something."

You weren't a heartless person. It kind of made you feel bad as you read previous missed texts from Bella, asking you if you can talk on the phone or if you were free.

You tried your best to give Paul the stress free mentality of not dealing with her. Knowing the danger that she was constantly around, you were a bit scared of it rubbing off on you.

She immediately texts back. Not hearing from you in a long time, made her not want to miss an interaction with you.

"Okay. I'm omw"

You waited as you looked around. She didn't take long before she pushes open the clear entry door and have her chocolate eyes searching for yours.

What surprised you was the hug that she gave you. She pulls back with a nervous chuckle, "I'm sorry. I haven't heard from you in a while, that's all."

"Yeah." you say bringing a nervous chuckle of your own. You extend the book in her direction as she softly smiles.

Her smile fades as she notices that you haven't finished it. She echoes her observation.

"You haven't finished it."

"I know. I'm going out of town and I don't want to lose it or anything." you explain.

She vocalizes two tisks as she looks back at the returned book, "Y/N, give it back to me when you’ve actually read the entire thing."

"I don't even know when I'm coming back." you say, bringing your shoulders up a bit.

Her eyebrows furrow a bit, "Did you change your mind? Are you leaving for college?"

You shake your head, "The power of art."

She smiles again, "That's good. I'm happy for you."

"At least keep it until I get back." you tell her, trying your best to convince her.

"No way. You might need it for the trip going there. Wait, where are you going?"

You hesitated as you thought of her immortal boyfriend finding out.

"Y/N?" she asks again when she doesn't get an answer, but cautiously.

She didn't have to know the exact city or place. Just the state.

Her eyes grow big, "Wow. That's awesome. I've never been."

"Really?" you ask her as you both walk out of the library.

As much as her mother moved around, you were surprised.

"Yeah." she says as a lock of hair moved with her fingers to rest behind her ear.

As you walk her to her truck, she then says, "I'm sure Paul is going to miss you like crazy."

"Yeah. I shouldn’t be gone for too long.”

You hear her sigh as you watch her open a cab door.

"What's wrong?' you ask.

She takes a moment, before continuing, "Do you think.. Never mind." she says.

"What? What is it?" you press on.

"I mean.. It would be nice if I got to get away like you. I really don't want to spend my birthday here. Then, you’re leaving." she says with gloom as she looks around.

"But, you get to spend it with Edward. Besides, I'm sure it's going to be all work with no fun anyhow." you say, trying to shrug it off.

She doesn't say anything but you could easily tell she wanted to.

She instead decides to sit in her driver seat.

"I can drop you back off if you want me to." she says, noticing you don't have car keys.

"The air feels good today."

"Y/N, get in." she says.

Your heart thuds almost out of your chest at the thought of her finding out where you and Paul lived. Afraid of the information she would tell Edward, you decide to play with flipping the script.

"What were you up to? I don't really feel like going home. Paul is out right now." you say as you close the passenger door.

"Doing chores. Fun, huh." she says with dry humor but her eyes still light up.

"Very." you say and both share a series of chuckles.

"Do you want to come over?" she offers. There was hope in her voice. Bella hasn't really made a genuine friend, let alone a human friend, enough to ever ask this question. It felt good to willingly ask this question to someone.

You nod. It was way better than explaining to Paul on why Bella Swan knows where you both live.

Driving on the highway, you both soak in the comfortable silence. For some reason, you felt like you had to get inside of this chick's head.

Sitting crisscrossed on her soft bed, your eyes wander around her bedroom.

You caught sight of the pictures that hung up, kids that definitely went to her school. A picture of her and her father. "Cool mustache" , you thought to yourself. Bella being hugged tightly by Renee as you could feel her carefree nature just by one glance at the picture. A long haired boy next to her was muddy as blush was painted on Bella's cheeks with the boy's arm slung around her shoulder. Taking an extra glance, you notice that she was muddy in the picture as well. A picture that stuck out like a sore thumb out of all of them, was the one with the Cullen boy. If you hadn't seen him in person with her, you would've thought she cut him out of a magazine and glued him next to her.

"So, that's why you were in Seattle." she says as realization hit as you tell her the full story of how this opportunity came about.

You nod your head as she chuckles, "Edward was trying to take me to something fancy, I convinced him to let me eat there."

"Wow." you say.

You then change the subject, “What was your first impression of Edward?”

“Perfect.” she says with a blush.

“You both met a school?” you ask. She nods.

“What about you?” she ask as she jerks her head a bit.

You shrug as you shyly smile, “I thought he was out of my league to be honest.”

A small laugh comes out of her throat as she says, “No, same. I still wonder how Edward finds me interesting.”

“Come on, it’s easy. You’re a pretty girl with a…Pretty guy to match. I’m sure this isn’t your first rodeo.” You say to not let herself feel low standard.

She gives you a look, “He’s my first boyfriend. Plus, guys didn’t look my way. In places like Arizona and California, I’m just another girl.” she explains.

You raise your eyebrows a bit at this. Understanding the rush, “Paul’s mine as well. I guess we’re experiencing relationships for the first time…together.”

A small smile doesn’t leave her face, “Okay, I’m shocked at you. You’re so easy to get along with.”

You shrug.

"I still haven't forgot that you told me you were going to let me peak into your sketchbook."

"I didn't forget." you say you say sweetly and a muffled knock appears at the door.

"I'll be back." she says as she gets up. Not thinking anything of it, you stretch your legs out in her spot until she gets back. Except, she doesn't come back right away.

You move closer to the cracked bedroom door as you hear voices beneath you. Almost being a pro at eavesdropping, you don't let your footsteps touch the ground hard under you as you sit close.

"They're dangerous, Bella." you hear a male voice, almost sounding like bells chiming.

"Well, Y/N's not. She's human. Like me."

"Who's dating someone dangerous, Bella. Who loses their temper faster than we do." the voice says, in that same bell like voice.

It was entrapping, it made you want to hear him speak a long speech, knowing you would never get bored. It was unnatural.

"Edward, that’s not fair. Plus, you won’t even explain why."

"What wouldn't be fair is if something were to happen to you." he says and silence fills the air.

You brace yourself to move, thinking he must've figured out that you're listening in, but luckily, he continues, "I know you're a selfless person, but Alice has been dying to spend more time with you."

Hearing her frustrated and impatient sigh, "Edward, I like spending time with people who have the same interests as me. Being Barbie Bella is tiring." she says.

"I know. You can just talk to her." he says.

"I have. I seriously don't believe for a second that you think she listens."

Silence then trickles into the air again as you give up, not even letting your position be known. It seemed like as soon as you sat on the bed, Bella came back in.

"Who was that?" you ask her.

"Just Edward. Are you hungry? I went shopping this week." she says as if nothing happened.

Wanting to know if your curiosity serves you right, you nod. Following her down the wooden steps, the perfect male is sitting stiffly in the kitchen chair.

Glancing at Bella, she opens her mouth, "Y/N. Edward. Edward, this is Y/N."

It was as if he tried to figure something out, as you kept your eyes on him. You didn't say anything. It reminded you of the look of concentration that he displayed when you saw him and Bella in Seattle.

"Hello." he says politely, but something in his actions felt like he wanted to say more.

"Goodbye." you say and you turn to Bella, "I should get going."

"You just got here. Please." she says, her eyes screaming for you not to go. Her hand even takes the extra length to be placed on your arm as you try to turn on your heels.

Sighing, you hated being in uncomfortable situations. You definitely didn't sign up to be a third wheel.

"I'll just be in the living room." you tell her. She's pleased with this.

"Cool. I can um.. Start dinner for Charlie then." she says with a small smile.

Giving her a tight smile you drop it as your back is faced towards her. Flopping on the couch, you press the buttons on the remote. Not knowing what to put on, you just let Animal Planet run its course. You didn't have to think.

The narrator finishes up the showing of the son of a lion being kicked out of the pride. The melodramatic music begins as the son has no choice but to leave and wander along the edges of established territories.

"They do it. If there's potential competition." the melodic voice speaks out, you jump a bit as you didn't hear him come in the living room. Out of you peripheral vision, you catch a glimpse of him as he sits stiffly on the other end of the couch.

You could still hear Bella tinkering about in the kitchen.

"I would say cool but.." you say as you impatiently wait for the commercial break to end.

"All it is, is nature." he says back.

You take a quick look at him. You wished you didn't. The amber eyes stared back at you with so much focus, it was uncanny.

You look away. You weren't afraid. It was just unnerving. His gaze was both pierce and intense. You weren’t used to something like this since the first time that you met Paul.

“Your eyes.” you just say as you watch the screen advertise paper towels, in a volume that you know only he could hear. You said it with such obvious clarity. The last commercial smoothly transitioned into the next animal’s day in a life.

“What about them.” he says slowly but steadily.

“They’re a bit..” you say and then smirk but shake your head.

“They’re a bit, what?” he pressed on but still coated with detectable persuasion.

“Unusual.” you say square at him and watch as his lips purse a bit at this. His eyebrows wrinkle a bit.

You then take your eyes back to the television screen. It wasn’t like he was going to do anything with Bella right in the kitchen.

“Is that a bad thing?” he asks with great curiosity as the animal’s day on the screen is paced slow.

“It’s an unusual thing.” you say as your eyes follow the vibrant colors of the safari scenery but to your surprise he chuckles a bit as he coolly says, “Hypothetically, you have something about yourself that’s unusual.”

You go silent as you just shrug him off. He then rises as Bella meets him halfway as she entered the room, her face filled with happiness to see him as she forgets her surroundings.

“Never again.” you sigh internally in your head as you rest your knuckle on your cheek as your arm rests on arm of the sofa. It almost felt more intrusive than Sam and Emily.

“I will leave you both be. Your friend is getting bored.” he says with humor but it was also as if he couldn’t wait to have something pinned on you. The smug smile that he tried to hide wasn’t unnoticeable to you. Bella just looked up to him with longing, but Edward held her close with such delicacy. It looked like a hint of a renaissance painting.

You didn’t expect the look of Edward’s face as he caught your eyes, the smugness slowly died down. It was as if he was reading or watching something in your eyes but you feel very unsettled, casting your glance to just Bella.

Bella then catches your eye and has a sign of remembrance as she then takes a shy hold of your hand as she walks you in the direction of the kitchen.

You felt safe in Bella’s grip but Edward’s eyes burned your skin. He literally watched you the entire way.

“Thank you.” you tell Bella as you politely take a baked treat of hers. She wanted you to try her dinner, but your stomach just couldn’t handle the heaviness of the food due to the lasting effects of Edward. A small desert was passable. It would let you buy time to think of responses if needed be.

She passed your welcomes and you both sit confortably at her table.

“He’s gone and I miss him already.” She says as she chuckles and nervously run a hand through her hair, “Is it like that with you and Paul?”

The fact that she acknowledged Edward’s absence, your tense shoulders dropped as you nod. It was true, you did miss him even at that moment.

Thinking of him, shuddered a wave of confidence through you. You were tired of tiptoeing.

“Do you both have a supernatural connection?” you ask.

She blinks as she looks at you with a wave of shock.

“Bella. It’s okay. I know Edward is not really human.” you carefully say as she still try to peddle through the river of denial.

She stutters out, “How? I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You are so not leaving me here by myself in this world.” you say to her and it shuts her up.

Her face goes even as she then looks down and then around. She shakes her head a bit as she lets out a small breath, “So, is Paul..?”

You didn’t want to deep dive into his abilities with someone who was dating his opposition.

“Something of that sort. But promise me something please.” you say.

She nods.

“Don’t tell Edward that…I know.” you say.

She nods again but speaks, “He can’t read my mind anyway.”

You make a gesture of not knowing what she’s talking about. She makes it crystal clear. You then wondered, what did he see in your mind? It shouldn’t have been too much since you spoke out to him directly, but you just didn’t know for sure yet.

“Lucky you.” you say as she lightens her mood, feeling relaxed and at ease again.

“I feel like it’s good that we’ve met. I mean it’s nice to know someone who’s like me, a human, who just knows what it’s like to keep secrets. Especially, about stuff like this.” she says with great relief.

You give her a smile as she has her feel of gratefulness.

Her hand stayed on the steering wheel as she looked over to you. Not only did common interests overlap with one another, she liked having you around a lot. You felt bad about the idea of completely cutting her off.

“Text me.” she says as you push open her truck door.

“Okay.” you say back as your feet touched the pavement of the beach parking lot.

Sitting on the rocks, your mind wandered free as dusk began to settle in. You call Paul but there’s no answer. He’s still not home by the time you walk back.

You felt a sense of lonesome, the shower that you took didn’t soothe you. Stealing Paul’s pillow, you clutch it close to you as his faint smell of him dance in your nostrils.

It was very dark but there a luminary light that pushed your footsteps forward. Walking towards it, you felt a strong hand try to pull you back but one hand started to multiply. Soon, hands were trying their best to keep you from going into the light that you were walking in.

You woke up with such urgency, you almost didn’t notice Paul smushed into you. Sighing in relief and tracing your hand on his cheek, he stirs in his sleep. As you let your mind play a supercut of your dream, Paul’s eyes slowly but tiredly blinks open as he catches a glimpse of your unsettled demeanor.

Reaching to kiss your jawline, he makes sure that you’re okay.

You nit pick at the breakfast in front of you. Paul watched your movements without saying anything.

“I think I’m going to stay back.” you say to the silent air.

“What?” he says, as if you were crazy. You don’t say anything as you watch your breakfast instead of eating it.

“Look, you don’t have to take someone with you I was just-“ he starts, but you didn't like the way that his eyes showed how he blamed himself, you cut him off.

“It’s not about that. I don’t know. I just feel like….” you say but sigh out as your shoulders hunch a bit.

“What is it?”

“I really want you to be the one to come with me.” you just quietly say.

He takes your hand. “Believe me, I feel the same.” he says.

Your mind goes to thinking again. You really want to tell Paul that Edward has an ability. It scratches at your brain. You wondered if this was something that he knew. But, the millions of questions would come and he’s been trusting you more. If he found out that you were around Edward to know, things would go back to square one.

“I'm so fucking tired.” he comments. You look up and see that he’s telling the truth. The bags under his eyes show proof of his claim.

The hand that he still had in his, rose to up and your lips place a kiss on the back of his.

"Can we trade places?" you say to make him feel a bit better.

"No way. Let your passion be the only thing that stresses you out." he says seriously. He rises as he announces his departure. Crushing you close to him, you gladly drink him in to the point where he had to be the one to unwillingly pull away.

Sitting at the kitchen table, you doodled in your pad to blow off the thoughts in your head. Barely paying attention to the direction of your strokes. It wasn't until you reached for your eraser, is when you look at the small picture that you drew.

The eyes were very familiar and striking. You tear out the page as you crumble it tight and toss it in the trash. All it did was bring out the memories of what those eyes held. A certain face floated in your head so you tried your best to distract yourself.

Calling Emily, you find out that she’s home. You smile at this. Your smile fades when she then drops, "Kim is here."

Retracting your interest, "Okay, well, I guess I will talk to you later."

Hanging up with her, you figure fresh, cool air should help you take your mind off of things.

You walk outside, the wind blowing as you take your time with your steps. Headphones were snug on your ears as you listened closely to the lyrics. The song, you and Paul’s song, came on and soothed you. You both came a long way since then. Your mind travels as you sit on the cliffs.

As you let the piece of charcoal glide in your small booklet, a quote stuck out to you.

“Hypothetically, you have something about yourself that’s unusual.”

Whatever that means. But what did it mean? Was it just a get back for your comment? The color was unusual. But most of all, you felt frustrated that all you wanted to do was clear your head but your mind kept going back to your interaction with Edward Cullen.

You scribbled frustratedly on the page, cursing for him taking up the space in your mind. It started to slowly turn into bitterness. Even his smug demeanor that he displayed the previous day was even on loop. As badly as you wanted to shake him off, you just couldn’t.

Sliding your headphones off while they were leaking with music, you let out a deep sigh. You definitely weren’t going to stay here and miss out on leaving town.

“Can you please at least come for dinner? I haven’t seen you in so long :( “

You read Emily’s text as you made your way down the cliffs. You were there for a while. Not responding, you just walk to her home.

Opening the door, the aroma of the supper that she cooked, smacked right into you.

Her body soon followed as she hugged you tight. “It’s been so long!” she gushes, happy to see you. Hugging her back, you squeeze her to let her know that you missed her as well.

Sam says hello to you as you touch his shoulder in passing. Moving into the living room, you find Paul sitting on the same sofa as Jared.

Wrapping yourself up with Paul, Jared jokes how a hello to him would be nice.

“Sorry.” you replied with nervous laughter. You didn’t get a chance to talk much after, Paul’s finger guides your face to his as he gets a taste of you.

“The bedroom is that way.” you hear an unpleasant voice suddenly say.

Ignoring it, you didn't even notice Jared telling her silently to stop.

You rise as you take Paul’s hand with you to sit at the eating table next to you.

Thank goodness the conversation was light but you were still silent, besides laughing at Paul’s humorous remarks that he would throw out.

You stood at the sink as laughter was floating out of the living room. Taking the dish out of the soapy water, you began to scrub with a sponge as the headphones softly sang songs in your ears.

With the dishes done, you go into the living room to join everyone.

Your phone drops out of your pocket as you move to sit next to Paul.

Kim moves to pick it up, she steals a discreet look at the notification that came across your screen. This action goes unnoticed as she stretched her phone out to you.

As much as didn’t want to, you mutter out a thanks. Paul moves your body to plop you onto his lap.

“Congratulations, by the way. Paul told us about your upcoming trip.” Jared tells you with a supportive smile. You gladly tell him thanks.

“What trip?” Kim asks. You say nothing as Sam just says, “She’s been a graced a wonderful opportunity.”

“How come no one’s told me?” she questions but the looks that went her way let her know that she couldn’t have been serious.

“Because we didn’t.” Paul impatiently says to get to her to be quiet so he can focus back on the television.

She scoffs a bit as she says, “I’m sure she told Bella Swan all about it.”

“Are you serious right now?” Jared asks her. You felt a bit bad that he was feeling irritated. Noticing the slight change in his normal vibrant self, he seemed defeated and had no ounce of optimism left.

“I am. She drops me for some vampire lover. I’m offended.” she explains.

“Kim, if you’re not going to control yourself, you have to go. We’re choosing peace tonight.” Sam tells her.

Kim sits back with her arms folded like an immature child as the only thing that was left to be heard in the room was the action on the television.

You volunteer to fill the popcorn bowl to escape the tension. You missed being over here a lot and you tried your best to not let a certain someone ruin it for you.

You check your notifications and it was a proposition from Bella.

“My birthday is in a few days and was wondering if it could be just us if you’re still here. I don’t want to do anything over the top.”

You type back, seeing indeed that the month of September had arrived.

“I honestly would have to let you know.”

The microwave beeped as you pulled the hot bag out and carefully rip it open. You shuffle out the contents into the bowl and hold it as you make your way back into the living room.

You hand Emily the bowl as you let yourself fall gracefully onto Paul’s lap.

Paul’s hand had a mind of their own as the darkness hid him circling your belly. Leaning back further on him, you thought nothing of it.

His hips did one smooth shift as your body rolled with him, an electrifying feeling, shot through you.

It was a bold move as his hand never leave the spot he had it placed but you sit up a bit, still feeling him beneath you.

You catch a peak at his face when he stares back at you with audaciously.

“I think we’re going to head out. Paul could barely keep his eyes open.” you say as you watch his face slowly turns into a smirk.

“Aw? Already?” Emily asks crestfallen.

You “help” him up with your hand as he rises from his spot.

“You know the time for tomorrow, right?” Sam asks Paul.

Paul stretches his limbs out as he nods.

It was your turn to stretch the limbs of your arms. Your hands were filled with the wrinkled sheets that were tight under your grip.

Paul’s hands caressed the skin of your back as your body rocked back and forth on his sleek stiffness. It scraped deliciously in your insides as your breathe out as name. His grunts were heavy as he then whispered out, “Shittt.”

He pulls back and emptied himself on the sheets as his hand couldn’t catch all of himself.

As you fit a clean sheet on the bed, you speak out with mellowness, “We shouldn’t do it raw anymore.”

He takes a glance at you as he speaks back, “Why? You don’t like how it feels?”

A heated feeling in your cheeks scorched as you smooth out the side that you tucked, “N-no. I mean, I do.”

“Then what’s wrong?” he chuckles a bit as he tosses a pillow onto the bed.

“You almost came in me.” you tell him in a small voice, you both have been intimate many times but talking about sex with him still brought shy, fluttery feelings.

“I always pull out in time.” he says with confidence.

“It only takes one time. And you didn’t …One time.” you say as you remembered the time when you woke up to both of you still intertwined. You’ve never felt so amalgamated with him. As vice as it seemed, it felt so good.

“I can smell when you’re ovulating.” he says casually and lays back on his side of the bed, looking to you to join him.

“I just don’t.. Want any mistakes.” you tell him cautiously as you cover yourself with the large cover.

“Do you want any mistakes, someday?” He asks as he pulls you to snuggle against his warmth.

“I don’t know. At least, not now.” you tell him with gentle shrug. You then look to him to watch his face, which was full of contentment. “What about you?” you ask him.

“To be honest, yeah.” he says and you feel trapped in his gaze as the honest truth shone through. He then reached over to turn the lamp off.

Early the next morning, you decided to take it easy by staying in. It was raining hard and the wet leaves stuck to the sidewalk and the streets.

It’s been a while since you’ve used your good paint and just went to work on a wooden canvas that you forgot you had. Halfway through making the inchoate, rainy, autumn scenery, you’ve decided to give this as a gift to Bella.

After you spread clear varnish onto your work, you decided to check your email.

A subject message stops you dead in your tracks.

The name alone stopped you in your tracks.

ALICE CULLEN

SURPRISE PARTY INVITE !

Not even clicking on it, you scroll. There was just no way you were going that deep.

Clicking on another inbox message, John had sent your ticket. You check the dates and see that you’re going to be gone for an entire week. You’ve also seen that you were leaving two days after Bella’s birthday. Sitting back with your arms crossed, you look at her gift.

[healdeals]

Sometimes I think about how much Mettaton (specifically in Undertale) and Spamton are foils to each other and it drives me perhaps a bit insane.

Like... Mettaton had the drive to go see the light of day on the surface, to be with humans and be a savior to monsterkind, and was willing to kill a kid to get there. He wanted to be more than a simple snail farmer and had Alphys there to help him build a new body. He, whether intended or not, abandoned family & friends to live out his dream.

Spamton is also more than willing to kill to get to see the light, he wants to be more than a darkner in a dark world, and abandons his friends to be [big] without them, relying only on the help of some strange benefactor until he also is abandoned.

They both can be self absorbed, their visages plastered around all the stuff they own (or owned). They can be inconsiderate of others. They have dreams of being big stars. There is no subtext with MTT figuring out his identity and his transitioning; its all plain to see. While it's more subtle for Spam, there are themes of self identity with him, too.

I think the biggest difference in their personalities is that Mettaton can be a lot more humble. Despite Burgerpants' treatment and taking Alphys for granted, a lot of the monsters in the MTT hotel do speak fondly of him, especially if he dies and you go back through the hotel afterward. He doesn't resist talking to Napstablook when they call in, even though he probably feels guilty for leaving them behind for whatever reason he did. He clearly still loves his cousin, and does appreciate his friendship with Alphys.

Meanwhile Spamton lies to himself about being better off without the Addisons. Deep down he doesn't mean it, but coming to terms with the reality of his feelings? Naw. He's probably had to use this tough guy persona to shield himself from criticism in his big shot days and now doesn't know how to take the mask off without it hurting. There's a lot of denial in his small body, not helped by the years of scraping by in back alleys after his fall.

Though, if the roles were reversed, would things have played out differently? Mettaton has the benefit of well-meaning people around him and luck. Its through shuffling around the trash zone that he met someone who could make his dream body come true, and who ALSO had ties to the king of the Underground. Spamton has... fairweather friends? We don't know for sure how close he was to the Addisons, or how much he thinks of his relationship with Swatch in his grander days, or how benevolent the person on the phone really was.

Yes, there was desperation to get to the surface for MTT, but he didn't have to deal with the mind-breaking information of how radically different and free the light world is when you live a deterministic existence. He didn't have to deal with seeing a soul as a blinding beacon within a kid's body. I doubt Metta wouldn't be overly obsessed with the light world, nor doubt Spamton wouldn't be content with his place in life, if they swapped shoes.

It's also so WILD that they don't know each other in the DR universe, but Mettaton had a profound impact on Spamton just by making his a little art file. He unknowingly is the one who gives this spam email a glimpse into world above, and possibly a piece of his own hopes and dreams as well. I wonder if later the DR Mettaton, too, will be affected in some way by Spamton.

[upmost-rylan]

S/O DATING THE CREEPYPASTAS *✧⁺˚⁺ପ(๑・ω・)੭ु⁾⁾

Author's note:

This was just supposed to be a #Rylan Rambles but u h I may have gone too far. So THIS IS MESSY SINCE I'VE NEVER DONE THIS BEFORE. so please don't expect anything good, I am good at art not story things.

T.w.:

for Eyeless Jack's part is cannibalism ofc

Jeff the killer

Jeff's type is very motherly like he loves a partner who's sweet but will basically drag him by the ear and lecture him for being a bitch. he is loving and sweet in his own way BUT you do have to have thick skin. at least for a while. he'll be throwing every insult in the book at you trying to get you away from him. he is scared of being vulnerable. So as he figures out his emotions it'll definitely be rough for a while and if you play into the "bit" and insulting him back, HE'D BE BLUSHING thinking you know how he feels. Be prepared since that'll be you two's love language! But for anyone who wants a relationship with this man there will definitely be some obstacles with him not being able to properly communicate his emotions in a healthy manner, his anger issues, the fact that this is probably his first ever relationship so it'll be rocky no matter what you do. But when you get over those obstacles and you are still there holding his hand with a smile you'll have a boyfriend FOR LIFE. Also become a sweetheart for those who love the idea of Jeff being soft to his partner.

Eyeless jack

His type to me personally is someone who treats him like he is a normal human being. That's it that's the one thing that'll make him fall head over heels in LOVE with you. But bonus points if you like to crack jokes and puns those ALWAYS make him laugh! He is a simple demon. However, THIS relationship is very much a MESS for at least the first half of it, you're in a relationship with a giant fluffy demon who eats human flesh did you expect it to be normal? This relationship is definitely a game of tug of war of him wanting to basically make you his dinner and wanting to keep you around because he loves you. You'd have to walk a really thin line to make sure this demon doesn't take one of your kidneys. But after a LONG while he'd start to actually act normal for the MOST part. Listen, I love to imagine this guy to be VERY creaturely. you know this if you have seen my design of him after a one or two years of being around you and not eating you; he leave a corpse (whether it's human or animal up to you) at your door like it's some gift from one giant cat.

Tim Wright/Masky

Tim/Masky's type is very "wife"-like if that makes sense (I headcanon him to be Bi-romantic Ace-spec so gender doesn't matter) like Tim to me loves the idea of having the white picit fence dream! it lets him feel like he's normal even for abit. Loves the idea of coming home from work to hug his partner from behind as he watches them cook dinner. Very domestic very demure. To most he's a pretty rough guy considering Masky but to me he's definitely a softy. compliment him and he'll be putty in your hands. 10/10 would 10000% smooch. But you two definitely sometimes have some trouble especially when Masky takes over. With that one YOU WILL N O T be able to sleep. every time you try to sleep be prepared to be shaken awake because masky finds it funny to startle you awake.

Brian Thomas/Hoodie

Listen we had Tim now we gotta do Brian, THEY ARE TWO PEAS IN A BOD YALL👏. His type to me personally is just a funny good vibes person, who loves being on the go and not in one place for too long. Now, this relationship is basically MADE OUT OF POSITIVE VIBES. Brian to me is definitely the type to praise his partner AT ALL HOURS OF THE DAY he is a absolute sweetheart. You'd also definitely love him if you like nature walks and hikes. You definitely had to be the first to confess though because if you didn't this situation would definitely be just mutual pining. Also definitely the type to always be following behind his partner since I like to think bro is a TALL man, he wants you to see whats Infront of you and not block the way. His nickname for his partner something nature relationship "duckling" "lil mushroom" "sunshine" or something similar!

[sashaasreads]

Love n' London

Harry Styles x Fem Reader

A/N Apologies for the delay! I’ve been busy, but I’m finally getting to upload again. Still no smut—I’m working on finding the right approach to write it without it feeling awkward. Thanks for your patience!

_______________________________________

Y/n grew up dreaming of living in London. Ever since she was a child, the city had fascinated her its vibrant art scene, the music, the historic architecture, and the countless little cafes. So, after graduating from art school, she packed her things and moved to the city, full of ambition and excitement.

She found a job as a curator’s assistant in a small gallery in Soho. It was the perfect job, really she spent her days surrounded by paintings and sculptures, getting to know local artists, and learning how to put together exhibitions. It wasn’t glamorous, but Lena loved it.

One grey October afternoon, y/n was at her usual spot in the gallery. She had just finished adjusting a painting, making sure it was perfectly aligned, when the bell over the door chimed, signaling a visitor. She glanced up to see a figure in the doorway, his frame silhouetted against the dim light outside. He was tall, with a tousled head of curls peeking out from under a beanie, a coat draped over his shoulders.

As he stepped inside, Y/n’s heart skipped a beat. The face beneath those curls was unmistakable Harry Styles, the singer she had admired for years. She had seen him in interviews, photos, and music videos, but nothing compared to seeing him in person.

Harry caught her looking and gave a small, shy smile. She blushed, quickly looking away, pretending to adjust her clipboard. But Harry approached her, offering a charming, friendly "Hello."

Y/n stammered out a greeting, her cheeks flushed as she tried to act calm. "Can I help you with something?"

“Actually,” he said with a little laugh, “I’m here to see some art, but I’d love a guide if you’re available.”

It turned out Harry was in town with a few days off between tour stops and had been wandering through London, exploring its art scene. Y/n walked him through the gallery, explaining each piece. She was passionate about her work, and he seemed genuinely interested, asking her thoughtful questions. They talked about art, music, and their favorite places in London.

After their tour, Harry surprised her by inviting her to a late lunch at a small café nearby. Still in shock, she accepted, and they spent the afternoon laughing and talking as though they’d known each other for years. Y/n found herself opening up to him in a way she rarely did, talking about her dreams, her childhood, and the strange mix of fear and excitement she felt about living in London.

Over the next few weeks, they continued to meet. Harry would drop by the gallery whenever he was free, sometimes bringing coffee or flowers. They would spend hours talking, sharing stories, and discovering new corners of the city together. Y/n soon realized that Harry, for all his fame and glamour, was remarkably down to earth. He seemed genuinely fascinated by her, by her art, by her life. And she, in turn, found herself falling deeper each day.

One crisp evening in November, after a quiet dinner in a little Italian restaurant tucked away in a side street, they found themselves walking along the Thames. The lights of London sparkled on the water, casting soft, dancing reflections. They walked in comfortable silence, fingers occasionally brushing against each other’s.

Harry stopped, turning to face her. His green eyes held a softness that took her breath away.

“y/n ,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “This might sound crazy, but I feel like I’ve known you forever.”

Y/n felt her heart pounding. She wanted to say something, but words seemed too small to capture what she felt. So she simply reached out, taking his hand in hers, and they stood there, the world fading away around them.

As the weeks turned into months, Harry’s tours took him to different cities, but he and y/n stayed in touch, talking late into the night, sharing stories, and sending each other songs and sketches. The distance was hard, but their bond only seemed to grow stronger with time.

Whenever he was back in London, they would pick up right where they left off. They explored every hidden gem in the city together, from art galleries and vintage bookstores to secret gardens and rooftop views. Harry introduced her to his world, taking her backstage at his concerts, letting her experience the thrill and energy of his performances. y/n introduced him to hers, taking him to underground art shows and showing him her latest work.

Their love story was a quiet, steady thing, like the pulse of the city itself. They were each other’s inspiration. Y/n's paintings became infused with new colors and emotions, and Harry’s songs took on a deeper, more soulful tone. She was his muse, and he was hers.

One rainy evening, a few years after they’d first met, Harry surprised her with a visit to the gallery. He was holding an umbrella and looked every bit as dashing as the day she’d first seen him. She was setting up a new exhibit and hadn’t expected him to come. But there he was, standing there with that familiar smile, his eyes shining.

“Harry!” She ran over, and he pulled her into his arms, holding her close.

“I’ve got a surprise for you,” he said, his voice warm and full of excitement. He led her outside and down the street, and before she knew it, they were at a small, empty theater. Inside, a grand piano stood on the dimly lit stage.

He sat down at the piano, motioning for her to sit beside him. Then, he began to play. It was a song she’d never heard before, gentle, heartfelt, each note weaving a story of love, devotion, and all the golden moments they’d shared.

When he finished, he looked at her, his face softened with vulnerability. “I wrote this for you, y/n. You’ve changed my life in ways I can’t put into words.”

Tears welled up in her eyes, and she took his hand, squeezing it. They didn’t need to say anything; the silence between them spoke louder than words ever could.

That night, in that quiet, empty theater, with only the faint glow of city lights around them, they knew they had found something rare, something lasting. The kind of love that was more than a moment it was a lifetime, etched in songs and sketches, laughter and quiet glances, memories, and dreams.

In each other, they had found a piece of themselves they never knew was missing a love that was as deep as the city they both called home.

[oceanlipgloss]

NICE

MEPHISTOPHELES.

+ no warnings.

+ my mc is the heroine, so the pronouns are feminine.

Violet bruises, grass stains. Her pale knees, smudged with a marble-like pattern of purple and green. Expected with frequent, clumsy falls.

Nothing that grotesque. Peeking out from under dark fabric. To some, the vision may have seemed a piece of art. He sat together with her in a pillow fort. Pressed close. A stubby candle spat light over a sandwich quite small, perfectly enough for one.

The soft space was cramped. Long legs stuck out of the ‘door’ to the mellow chamber. He liked the weight of her smooth legs over his.

It was nice.

Makeshift seats, bruised knees, commoner meals. Was she gifting him the taste of pauperism and its childish experiences?

Perhaps it was inappropriate, but...his fingers traced spirals over the curious colour palette on her skin. The bone was hard as it was crafted to be, though not cold. She was warm. Stars—magnetic and sweet—seemed to flow from his silk-coated fingertips.

His hand was in hers. A pair of white gloves rolled off like buttercream. They were put aside. Wasn’t it better to feel her bare touch against his? A slow interlace.

Taking his big hand, delicate fingers filling the gaps, a man pleasantly trapped. There were flames under his skin. She had him feeling somewhat dizzy.

It was nice.

Birthdays are meaningless days. They don’t have to be made out into celebrations or parades. There is nothing particularly precious about a date on which one was born. What matters most is the person, their everyday presence at the current moment in the world.

There are times when less is more. The tiniest things may craft happiness of the purest, most unfiltered sort. There doesn’t have to be cake or confetti; they’re not necessary.

There are times when it’s better to withdraw and forget the existence of invitations. Stay alone, or stay with someone.

Happiness was glowing in his heart then—a moon dulcet in its humming and silver in its colour—not a noisy, gaudy neon.

Ketchup on his nose, licked away with her cheeky tongue. An exasperated sigh. So playful.

Makeshift seats, bruised knees, commoner meals. Pillow, candle, sandwich.

He was thinking about it all when warmth glossed his lips. It was wet and unfamiliarly familiar. A sneak peck. Not the first, not the last. She loved surprising him like that, and he loved—though almost begrudgingly so at first—when she did.

These days he unthinkingly gave in.

He had pocketed the flavour of her kiss. And he was never forgetting it now. Will she keep doing this all again for him?

It was nice.

Riches are important and money is for survival, but so are the proper emotions. Perhaps his was the heart that had been throbbing in a life bleaker than a pauper’s.

+notes: first birthday fic in years and it's for Mephi. Intimacy bar when

+ MASTERLIST

+ AO3 POST

©𝙤𝙘𝙚𝙖𝙣𝙡𝙞𝙥𝙜𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙨

[kolumander]

i want to get into oil painting