#this ones not nearly as funny but you can have it

[wileys-russo]

christmas showcase II a.russo

lil christmas fic for the maternal instincts universe christmas showcase II a.russo

"what so the state wide budget gets cut, something entirely out of your hands, and now the school expects teachers to pay for the supplies for christmas crafts for the kids?" your girlfriend scoffed in disbelief as you smiled, dumping another armful of stationary into the trolley you'd tasked her to push.

"yeah thats the reality year round love, did you ever have a pizza party in school? teacher funded." you hummed, alessias eyes widening even further as you squatted down, thumbing through the craft paper for the colours you needed.

"what!" "mhm, we've discussed this before less." "well yeah, but-well-" you stood back up and dropped the packs of craft paper onto your ever growing stack of supplies. "butts are for ashtrays, not conversations." you teased, lightly patting her cheek and striding on ahead.

"ugh please don't teacher talk me." alessia groaned pushing the cart after you. "then don't speak like one of my students." you stuck your tongue out at her as the blonde pulled a face.

"hey where's bella? bell!" alessia called out in realisation, head scanning the aisle and not seeing her anywhere. "probably adding more to her list for santa." you chuckled knowingly, and sure enough moments later the five year old came skidding around the corner.

"what did we say about running off?" alessia warned making you smile, the older girl not always having felt comfortable 'parenting' bella, but the last few months she'd really melted into it and taken it in her stride.

"i didn't run! i walked." bella nodded matter of factly, squealing as alessia mocked her and tugged playfully on her ear. "are you nearly done? the monsters hungry again!" bella sighed, patting her stomach dramatically and sagging into alessia's leg as the two of you shared a grin.

"the monster who just insisted you needed an extra two pieces of toast this morning? and who just had a blueberry muffin?" you teased, placing a few more things into the cart as bella huffed.

"no! the muffin was for me, i'm a growing girl who needs her energy to get big and strong, to stay healthy and match ready." bella parroted as you shot your girlfriend a look, the words may have been coming from your daughters mouth but they weren't hers.

"well ronaldo you don't have football for another two months so i am sure we can help you grow another inch or two by then!" you laughed, tugging her beanie down over her eyes as the three of you headed toward the registers.

"thats not funny! daddy said its your fault im so short." bella scowled stomping on ahead. "yeah well your dad didn't hit his growth spurt until he was sixteen!" you called out with a roll of your eyes, tugging the beanie over her eyes again as she stopped to finger her way through the candy display at the front of the store.

"less!" you protested when your girlfriend grabbed the chocolate bar bella was eagerly pointing to, giving her a look. "what? this is for my monster, he's hungry too!" the blonde pointed at her stomach as bella giggled and you sighed shaking your head and beginning to load things onto the conveyor belt.

"thank you." you smiled kindly to the young boy at the register, who you assumed was a football fan given the wide eyed glances he kept shooting your clueless girlfriend, too busy holding the chocolate out of bellas eager reach.

"she doesn't mind when people ask for photos." you whispered to him as his cheeks flushed and you sent him a wink, tugging the trolley forward and loading the last bag, calling out for your daughter who grabbed your outstretched hand.

sure enough alessia hung behind to take a photo with the young boy whose elated grin stretched ear to ear, the blonde jogging to catch up with the two of you as you made your way across the parking lot to the car.

"so, are you and harvey excited for christmas mutant?" alessia questioned as she buckled bella in and you loaded the bags in the back, poking at the teddy bear securely buckled in with her.

"yeah! mummy did you send my letter to santa? did you? did you?" bella asked once you'd arrived home, bouncing up and down on the driveway as you chuckled at her excitement.

"sure did babe, mailed it on friday and put on 4 stamps just like you asked me to." you confirmed, looking down at her with a smile and pinching her cheeks as she squealed and kicked her leg at you.

"mama did you finish your list for santa yet? mummy and i finished ours!" bella accused as alessia grabbed the bags out of the boot, only half listening.

"mama?" "sorry what was that bell?" "your santa list, did you finish it?"

"my...santa list?" alessia glanced at you curiously as you subtly nodded. "oh, yes! yes i did." alessia clarified with a firm nod, bella sighing in relief and racing off to the front door, you and alessia following after and letting her inside.

"so your mums still fine with us coming for christmas?" you asked a little while later, bella not long having gone to bed as you and alessia laid on the sofa watching a film.

"are you joking?" alessia asked seriously, sitting up a little more with a frown as you blushed.

"well its just-you know this is our first christmas together. and i've not been with someone for a christmas since i had bella, i forget how it works." you mumbled, a little embarrassed, groaning and covering your face with your hands.

"it works the same as any other christmas! except this time my family have a beautiful little girl to spoil rotten and i have a gorgeous girlfriend to sit with at dinner." alessia laughed, wrenching your hands away from your face.

"don't laugh! you know i overthink everything." you sighed, playfully hitting her shoulder as she grabbed your legs, tugging you closer so you were practically in her lap.

"well christmas eve we'll be here, and we'll make cookies and watch christmas films and do all the traditions you and bell have for years, which i feel very honoured to learn and participate in." alessia started, absentmindedly tracing patterns on your forehead.

"and make christmas tree shaped pizzas, just like i promised bella." alessia added before you could chime in as you reached up and squeezed her face in your hand which she batted away with a smile.

"then christmas morning we'll go see your mum and dad for brunch. then we'll go to my parents place in the afternoon, have dinner and mums insisting we all stay the night but i told her i had to check that with the boss first." alessia finished with a curt nod, poking your nose with a wink.

"the boss being me?" "no i meant isabella, obviously?" "ha ha ha."

"yes you!" alessia laughed when you attempted to smack her, catching your hand and kissing it a few times before letting it fall back to your side with a thump.

"if she's prepared for a bossy, chatterbox, sugar hyped five year old running around for hours until she passes out then i think that sounds lovely." you smiled as your girlfriend chuckled and leaned down to press her forehead against yours.

"well then we have a plan baby, nothing to overthink now."

~

"-and you're sure you don't mind if they come?!" alessia asked for the tenth time this morning making you laugh. the school you worked at and bella attended having its annual christmas showcase the end of the week and over half the arsenal girls insistent they attend.

"no babe, i already reserved seats for them and they paid for tickets! bella is very very excited they're coming, usually its just nathan and our parents since i'm backstage helping." you assured, pecking her lips a few times as she tried to argue, softening and pulling you back for a proper kiss.

but that ground to an abrupt halt when gagging noises sounded, bella covering her eyes and very loudly demanding the two of you stop 'swapping spit' as she so eloquently put it, still deep in her kissing is gross phase.

"yuck! have you stopped now?" she questioned, peeking out from her hands as alessia cupped your cheeks and pressed her mouth to yours again making you laugh and bella gag loudly again, covering her face with one hand and her teddys face with the other.

"my eyes are burning!" "oh does that mean you can't see this then?" you questioned, grabbing alessia's face right back as the two of you messily kissed as bella dramatically fell to the floor with a thud and a groan.

"oh she was so young, so full of life!" alessia cried out, scooping your daughter up and carrying her into the kitchen fireman style. "i guess we better go downstairs and bury her in the garden, she did love pulling out the weeds every summer." you sighed, moving to open the front door as bella shot up in your girlfriends arms.

"don't bury me the dirt will go up my nose!" "oh my god she lives!" you yelled out, closing the door and throwing your hands into the air. "almost. i think we might have a zombie on our hands!" alessia hummed, skeptically poking at bellas face who giggled.

"i made something at school!" bella wiggled as alessia put her down and she shot off to her room, giving you just enough time to steal a few more kisses before she returned.

"paper chains for the tree and a star!" bella started, waving you and alessia into the living room and practically pushing you both to sit down as she rummaged around in her bag, only having a few more days left before she was done for the year.

"oh very nice mutant, i like that you used a lot of colours." alessia complimented as the two of you shared a look of amusement, everything draped in enough glitter for two pride parades.

"okay now cover your eyes, and no peeking mama!" bella warned as alessia scoffed with offence. "why did you only warn me?" the striker huffed as you grinned. "because you would peek." bella explained patting the girls knee who rolled her eyes but covered her eyes.

you felt something drop into your lap and heard some shuffling before it was announced the two of you could look. you glanced down to see an ornament in your lap, a bright red bauble with mummy scrawled on it in hot pink glitter glue.

"oh bella." you looked to your side to see alessia had one as well, but you couldn't quite make out what it said but it appeared to have more writing on it than yours.

"do you like it? i chose red for arsenal!" bella beamed, puffing her chest out proudly as alessia turned it a little so you could read.

mama's first christmas.

"oh bell, they're beautiful." you smiled softly, picking her up into a tight hug, squeezing your girlfriends knee who seemed lost for words.

"cause its your first one with us! my teacher had to help me with the writing." bella explained, head resting on your shoulder as she reached her other arm out for alessia to join the hug.

"oh less!" you groaned as the blonde practically tackled the pair of you to the sofa in a tight bear hug making bella giggle as alessia kissed all over both of your faces.

"best christmas ever."

~

"does every parent tell their kid they can sing even when they're this horrible?" leah whispered skeptically as alessia shot her a look and lia rammed an elbow in her other side making her wheeze.

"what! just a question." leah grumbled, alessia smiling apologetically to the sharp shush which sounded from a man in the row in front of them. "i think it is sweet." lia defended, the choir finishing their rendetion of santa clause is coming to town as everyone errupted into applause.

"i think leah should shut up." kyra shrugged once they'd sat back down, the blonde shooting her a glare and reaching over alessia to try and smack the young australian.

"stop it! the pair of you." steph chimed in from kyras other side, smacking the blonde as alessia shoved leah and both girls settled back in their seats with a mutter.

"oh this is bell's class!" alessia perked up as K3 was announced and slowly the very nervous looking kindergartens were ushered onto the stage by a few of the year six kids who were helping out.

you peeked out from the curtain and snickered, catching thirteen phones all up and filming before the song had even started, alessia wiggling her fingers at you with a face eating grin.

"you got this!" you gave the kids on stage a thumbs up, moving out of the way so their teacher could stand in the wings, also doing the dance in case anyone forgot as the opening bars of the song began.

"lessi your face is gonna crack in half if you smile any wider." kyra teased, alessia shushing her as she zoomed in on bella who was easily one of the more enthusiastic of the class as they made their way through their dance.

"now see that? thats real talent." leah nodded, putting her fingers in her mouth and whistling as a womans head whipped around to glare at her and she simply pulled a face making her scoff and turn back around.

"oh my god." you couldn't help but chuckle as right as the song finished the entire row of girls were up on their feet, whistling and clapping like they'd just watched someone score the winning game in extra time, a few other parents giving them strange looks as slowly the kids shuffled off stage and they sat back down.

but judging by the shit eating grin on your daughters face and the pride shining in your girlfriends eyes as bella lingered on stage to wave enthusiastically to her cheer squad before being gently shooed off, it was worth it.

alessia had been right, best christmas ever.

[hello-from-nrc-infirmary]

Vern's Hometown: Centennial Celebration

Book 5: Finale

Chapter 3: Sunset

Formal is irrelevant. The firelight gains prominence as daylight fades. More logs are added, allowing smoke to fill the air. The younger children slowly leave for their beds. Others stay, laughing with friends. Their joyful cacophony is almost drowned out by the rambunctious music.

Smoke and ash wisp into shadows. The kaleidoscope of prancing images twirl around them. An illusion of flowers dance underfoot. If any attempted to touch them, they would vanish.

Soot is kicked up with every step. Vern's stained skirts flare out on another spin. It's strange and comforting to have a partner. A familiar dance he can do in the deepest of sleeps now flutters anew with every beat. A few steps bring them back.

Sweat shimmers across their foreheads. The minutes and hours bleed together. One melody into another. An iridescent fish ballet weaves around the dancers. A bubbling laughter spills from Vern. Steel smiles, his own airy laugh joins in.

"What's... so funny?"

The sprite meets his gaze breathlessly, "I'm... really happy."

"Eh?"

Joined hands lift above to spin around. The area around them is barely a blurr. Focus returning to Steel, the sprite tries to calm himself. "I-is he still umm..."

"Yeah, on my six."

"... let's um... not think about him," Vern tries. His head feels light, a mild dizziness buzzes down from it.

".. okay."

He welcomes night's breath cooling his skin like autumn rain. Vern can tell when some musicians would take a break and join back in. A simple rotation, yet easy to get lost in. Forgetting the world is hard, yet indulging in a moment is effortless.

For this bubble in time, emotion vibrates the air. Colorful shapes morph to each beat. It has been too long since his muscles felt like a newborn foal finding it's footing. Who is keeping who from collapsing is unclear. The firm earth underfoot is the only certainty.

A gasp from the onlookers is nearly drowned by the rhythm. A string pulls at his mind. His eyes want to follow, yet a turn blocks his view. His brow creases as he attempts to see behind Steel. "Ver.."

Pink dusts the sprites cheeks. It's only one word, a fraction of his name. The syllables spoken softly warms him. Tearing his focus back to his friend, he tries to stay on his toes.

"Almost," Steel winks, "we have to finish this one."

"Y-yeah," Vern manages a dizzy nod. His amber eyes sting, but not from the smoke. A soothing wave rolls through his veins, easing his tension. He almost misses a familiar, icy crack.

Chapter 4: Dusk

A tight spin jostles his focus. Flashes of magic collide. The music falters as smoke billows through the remaining crowd. Vern squeezes his eyes shut against it. Tucking himself against Steel, he waits for the air to settle. He flinches, as a drop hits his cheek.

"Er.. sorry."

The sprite swears the liquid away. Checking his bandages, he finds an inky substance he's well acquainted with.

"It's alright, I um..." he pauses, ducking as Steel casts another counter spell, "don't mind."

Sparkling green mist flares from Vern's hands. Vines burst from the ground to restrain Victor. "Enough!"

Snowflakes drift around them. Citizens that stayed murmur in uneasy awe. The spring sprite trembles slightly, his muscles begging for rest. "Do you forfeit the challenge?"

There's a rumble underfoot. Stumbling, Vern's spell loosens as spikes of ice shoot out of the dirt. He's tackled. Air is knocked from his lungs despite the cushioned fall.

"You alright? Any injuries?"

Vern slowly blinks up at Steel, gasping while registering the questions. "U-umm... I'm fine... I think..."

"Why," Victor's voice rings out above the chaos, icicles forming in the air around him. "Why do you reject everything I do for you?!"

Ooc// Welcome to the final boss fight.

Tag List: @nrcbookclub @castaway-achlys @nightonthemountain

Songs for the dance:

There's Nothing Holding Me Back by Shawn Mendes

A Bar Song (Tipsy) by Shaboozey

I Don't Wanna Wait by David Guetta & OneRepublic

Roundtable Rival by Lindsey Stirling

Élan by Nightwish

Songs for Everyone vs. Victor:

It Ends Tonight by All-American Rejects

Liar by Jelly Roll

Ready For This by All Good Things

Trophy Hunter by Within Temptation

[ddaz3d-and-cc0nfused]

a/n: this is honestly a hot ass mess, and more like an info dump with some loose plot on the side. it's also ridiculously long because i have been wanting to write about this for so long, but i was lowkey too scared too. i also want to say that i don't condone the reader's actions, mean girls aren't cute nor are they funny, it's just for the morally gray plot 😭

i literally cannot stop thinking about what if Spencer Reid had a childhood best friend that was a mean girl.

realistically, i'm aware that spencer looks down on people like that, but for the sake of this au, imagine if the both of you grew up together, and you protected him from bullies and whatnot.

of course you're not a moral person, you're mean and you have a wicked tongue, and you're all around not nice, but spencer loves you.

i'm imagining a typical LA valley girl; that once you both get older, your clothing gets sluttier and you get meaner, while he gets nerdier.

your dynamic i imagine would be a really loose adaptation of the 'mean to everyone else but you' trope.

it's kind of funny to an outsider looking in, because you feel the need to protect your boy genius from people like you.

spencer helps to reel in the bitchy tendencies in you, because you typically lose your cool fast and say whatever's on your mind, which usually comes at a cost of the other person's feelings.

when you guys were younger, he was definitely scared of you.

though you were this chunky girl that should have been bullied right along with him, you were downright worse than what he had to deal with.

the poor boy nearly shit himself when you sat with him at lunch the day after you had saved him from getting his ass kicked.

he was too nervous to say anything, and you've never left him alone since.

now that spencer's older, he figures that your friendship kind of tracks; he always did attract trouble.

the strange part about it was that, yes, you were snappy, but you had never purposely tried to hurt his feelings.

he knows how you get, especially when you go on your tangents or if your buttons had been repeatedly pushed.

you lash out and say things you don't mean, then slink back into his arms with that charming pout on your face, and an apology thick on the tip of your tongue.

spencer sometimes forgets that people kind of fear you because you're sweet on him.

like let's be honest, you're a judgy bitch. no one likes those.

so when he's exposed to that side of you, he gets whiplash.

you took well to the team though, and i only think that's because you can tell how much they mattered to him.

your main thing had always been to try and defend him against people that have ill intentions.

so when see the sheer amount of camaraderie and familial energy that surrounds all of them, you ease up.

but not when they cut him off. that's when you get ugly.

you guys were in separate grades due to spencer jumping ahead, but you still hung out on a daily basis, you had heard his statistical chattering for the majority of your life.

so, you knew it was something he found pleasure in doing, and you'd be damned if someone upset him.

you really did try and bite your tongue! but sometimes morgan's ego was too big for his body, or maybe jj gave him one too many looks for your liking.

luckily spencer can catch the cat-fight bubbling in you from a mile away; he can see the way your eyes narrow first, a disbelieving smile on your face while your exceptionally done nails tap on the nearest surface in irritation.

have you ever seen a cat when its hair stands up on the back of its neck? yeah, that's you.

all it takes is a warm hand on your naked thigh and a small shake of his head to make you huff and cross your arms, the clinking of your bangle bracelets moving along with you.

of course he'll hear all about it on the ride home.

spencer's feelings for you had always been there, but there was a difference between you being his best friend and his lover.

and honestly? that grade school intimidation that he had felt would came back.

because at the end of the day you were you, and he was him.

it was a ridiculous thought, one that you had dismissed when you had confessed to him yourself.

"do you like me back or not, spence?" you had asked out of the blue one day. "because you keep looking at me and not doing anything about it. It's kind of pissing me off."

his wide, shocked eyes met yours, practically tearing his gaze away from the book he had been engrossed in.

"i... do."

"do what?"

"yes, i do like you back."

"good."

dating wasn't all that different than being your friend, he had come to realize.

the only thing that was different was that you were sweeter than ever.

always complimenting him and buying him shit, posting him all over your social media, and even making him your lock screen.

you were so proud to be his partner, that he had forgotten what being loved out loud had felt like.

your relationship came as a shock to no one, of course.

y'all are the epitome opposites attract.

your skimp wear compared to his cardigans, your bite to his soft ask, your scoff to his chuckle.

that's what spencer's come to love. the fact that you guys are so different.

yes, you're a handful, yes you're mean to him sometimes, but like i said before:

he loves you. and that's all that matters.

[venuslarkspur]

The Devildom’s Very Own Tamaranean Exchange Student <3

Summary: After escaping your planet after its hostile take over and your imprisonment, you resume life on earth living amongst humans. However you are unknowingly picked for an exchange program to strengthen relationships between different realms, because of your alien physiology; your arrival caused quite a stir.

- Demon Brothers x Fem!Tamaranean!Reader.

Note: Reader is Bi/Pan, Reader is tall as Tamaranean are canonically quite tall (sending love to all the tall folk you’ve reached your content <3 and sorrys to all the short folk but I’m sticking to Tamaranean physiology), Reader is about 5’9-6’0 I HAD TO USE Y/N I HATE MYSELF.

Warning: Mostly fluff but there’s some angst as well, slight NSFW.

—————————

Lucifer

- Can I just say first of all it annoys Lucifer especially that you’re not intimidated by him or any demon for that manner, you literally have laser vision, super strength, stamina, speed, agility etc. flight, star bolts..do I need to go on 😭?

- Is the first person to learn about your solar/ultra violet absorption which provides you with your power, your power is still mighty even from the Devildom. Is curious to know how powerful it would be in the celestial realm.

- Very confused on how one of Lilith’s earlier descendants somehow managed to land on Tamaran.

- You’re also really shocked when you realise you have human and angel dna.

- Does secretly enjoy when you retort back at him. Pretends it angers him.

- Thinks you’re a really good influence on Mammon oddly enough, sometimes questions if you’re the one looking after him.

- Has to remind you not to fly everywhere or levitate, you’re in the devildom now Mc.

- Absolutely loves watching you try and tame your glowing, fiery hair.

- Secretly love’s your little fireworks shows from your hands.

- Lectures his brothers when they offer kisses to you to help you “expand your vocabulary” although he will ask for one himself later.

- Tries his best not to bring back any tragic memories of your imprisonment.

- Finds your random love attacks surprising but eventually begins to enjoy them.

Mammon

- Spawns in and takes one look at you and is stunned 😦

- You always gently remind Mammon that he isn’t rocking your shit any day now. He pretends to get annoyed at you when you remind him this. (It makes him like you more pft)

- Mammon dies down on the threatening when he first meets you and you immediately match his stance and stand up straight. You’re nearly taller than him wtf. He constantly emphasises he’s your first, you not really getting it straight up say “no you aren’t, I had lovers on Tamaran and on Earth.” Literally sends the rest of his brothers into a laughing spiral and you are wondering what’s so funny. It doesn’t matter you’re still HIS alien.

- jokingly asks you if you have 9 stomachs, since your hunger is almost as bad as Beels at this point and you reply with a serious “yes.” Satan explains to him, putting his book down on the table; (after studying your physiology) that Tamaranean’s have 9 stomachs. He jolts backwards slightly which offends you until he finds some odd way to let you know he’s sorry.

- me and my friend were talking about how Mammon is secretly really insecure so I think reader would beat the negative thoughts out of him on the daily, you can tell when he’s jealous or upset.

- Brags about how strong you are even though he was kind of freaked out at first.

- Now as much as I hate this term, you wear the pants in this relationship. Witches have started to leave him alone because they know you will star bolt them if needed, it doesn’t matter to him that you ward off these people though he just wants you tbh.

- Loves how empathetic you are but knows you can go from kind to brutal if you need to.

- Okay when you first met he was not so secretly flustered at your choice of clothes so you gently remind him of his demon forms lack of cloth. Yeah he’s shut up really quick.

- Love’s your fiery hair, especially when he gets to watch you brush it out.

- Acts like your eyes are freakish but he secretly loves your green alien eyes <3

- Anytime he has to come to YOUR rescue he reminds you he’s the “Great Mammon” and that’s “just his job” yeah you’re gonna be chucking him over your shoulder later.

- Love’s your levitating kisses.

Leviathan

- At first thinks your sweet nature is just an act after you try and fight him back after the TSL quiz incident.

- Kind of scared of you after that, even when you try and talk to him, he walks away.

- Slowly warms up to you, quite literally your warm body attracts him.

- If you go to any conventions together and you wear heels he will definitely LOVE that you’re taller than him, he finds it so attractive I’m sorry.

- The definition of girlboss + loser boyfriend <3

- Is so confused on how another one of Lilith’s descendants ended up on Tamaran.

- Asks about customs on Tamaran and would follow it up with “its like the planet from this anime-“

- Finds your food combos mildly disgusting (I mean even for the devildom that’s messed up.) but keeps his mouth shut.

- You made little fireworks out your hands once and that was enough for him to fall for you.

Satan

- Wow, I think Satan would be so interested in your Tamaranean physiology, he makes it his mission to learn more about you; it’s nice to have someone be interested in you rather than fear you for a change.

- Probably discovers things about you that you didn’t know.

- If you two start dating Satan definitely wouldn’t care if you were taller than him or not.

- when he finds out you can learn languages through kissing he’d definitely tell you he knows a bit of French or smth if you’re interested. (Even if you’re not dating yet 😭) he’s defo sly like that.

- Would ask if you’ve ever thought of returning to Tamaran and as much as you would like to you know it’s not safe for you, you both bond over feeling out of place.

- Loves your warm nature since it’s such a 180 to his behaviour, you use your warm hands to calm him down.

- If he’s reading and has left a hot drink you tell him to sit back down and let you handle it, you use your laser vision to heat up his drink and he’s just like damn. Yeah he loves your powers.

- You guys talk about exploring the cosmos together, since when you came to earth you didn’t really get the chance to from your speeding space ship.

- Will disassemble anyone at RAD if they make fun of you for whatever reason, you’re the one who’s gotta tell him no <3

Asmodeus

- Asmo however loves that you’re taller than him and he openly voices it all the time. He follows all your socials since you’re a model in the human world, he eventually admits you’re almost on par with his beauty.

- Like Satan he’d definitely tell you he knows a bit of Italian or smth just so he can get a kiss from you.

- I tried to avoid this as much as possible but your bedroom life would be crazy. Like he’s the Avatar Of Lust?! You’re an alien with promiscuity literally written into you. I SHOULDN’T HAVE TO CONTINUE 😭

- Would ask if you’re a princess until you seriously tell him your planet already had royalty.

- Immediately sets you up for all the devildom’s social media, you’re so well loved and received in the devildom which is such a contrast to how people first reacted to you on earth.

- Is a bit jealous of your flaming hair but you remind him he’s the fairest in the land.

- Yeah you’re a head turning couple.

- Would say you’d have the cutest kids as a joke but you think he’s serious.

- Needs to see how radiant you look with the sun on you.

- Makes so many jokes about your cloth or lack of cloth, but will stop if it’s making you uncomfortable.

- He loves how eye catching you are, like your vibrant eyes, hair and dress mwah 💋, thinks you have some of the best style ever and always lets you know on your socials.

Beel

- Your immediately in Beel’s good books when you help free his twin, you already were with your shared gluttony so he liked you immediately. You really respect Beel as he’s one of the first you’ve met that’s stronger than you.

- Unlike the rest of his brothers he wouldn’t offer you a kiss, (he’s not weird like that) but would ask you about your 9 stomachs and fiery hair.

- Doesn’t mind your manner of dress, even if Asmo points it out and makes some suggestive comments he won’t pay any mind to it.

- Out of pure innocence you feel his muscles out of curiosity.

- He’s not sure why but he loves just touching your fiery hair, you give him permission ofc <3

- Unironically you’re his favourite snack buddy.

- Also wonders if Mammon is the one looking after you or you’re the one looking after Mammon.

- Is also very curious about Tamaran, feels really bad for the rest of the day when you tell him about your planets plague of war and your imprisonment. You let him know it’s okay and you’re fine now <3

Belphegor

- In this scenario Belphegor wouldn’t kill you, since you aren’t human. He does try and manipulate you still but you sense the deceit coming off him. You refuse to help him at first; but in this case scenario you’d still help free him and actually start off on more neutral terms.

- Belphie definitely naps on you more because of your abnormally hot body temperature, idk but he definitely likes that you’re taller than him I think he’s a freak like that even if you’re not together.

- Since you’re freakishly strong you probably just bridal carry him places he needs to be, he thanks you after.

- Could watch you make mini fireworks out your hands for hours, the sound of your sparks is oddly soothing.

- When he asks if you want him to bring you a star you’re really excited at first and he feels bad crushing your spirit, you ask him if he wants a star though. He can’t tell if you’re serious or not.

- Contrary to popular belief I think Belphie actually does like PDA sometimes, he likes holding your hand wherever. It’s warm.

- Could watch you untangle your hair for hours on end and never get bored.

- You probably change his opinion on humans slightly, not only because of your human DNA but because of your own opinions on humanity; yes you were mistreated at first but slowly you met a couple good ones. He believes you, if you were able to overcome your abuse via humanity, so could he. He won’t tell you that though.

- He looks forward to when you’re alone because he knows that’s when you strike with your love attacks.

——————-

And that’s Fem!Tamaranean reader <3

Side characters are in the works now <3

@waterwyne @planetlotus @girlmachia @fiersworld

[overmystars]

The Until Dawn cast and Mario Kart Wii... I pondered very long and very hard about this question... and return bearing real and true answers (headcanons and rambles ⬇️)

Beth: Insane MKWii goddess. Grew up on the game and played constantly. Put lots of time into learning a handful of ultra shortcuts and sometimes pisses everybody off by using these just for fun. The group can count on one hand the amount of times she hasn't gotten 1st. Can efficiently use any controller, but prefers the Wii classic controller. Put crazy time trials on every single track that remain unbeaten to this day. Not that Josh would ever beat them even if he could. She'll always be remembered through the ghosts she left. Josh has thought about booting the game up just to drive around with her again but... hasn't

Hannah: Prefers coin runners to racing. Peach main as soon as Beth became a Daisy main (matchies) chose the prettiest vehicle and is sticking with it <3 didn't play nearly as much as her siblings but did spend many hours watching both Beth and Josh grind glitches/time trials and stars. Wii wheel user!

Josh: Really good at this game. He can get fiercely competitive too, depending on who else is playing. Otherwise he's chill. Played almost as much as Beth did- and spent hours and hours trying to get stars on every cup to unlock Dry Bowser. He refused any help from Beth and celebrated for a week when he finally did it. Prefers how Jr feels to play and breaks him out when he's feeling particularly competitive but otherwise sticks to Dry Bowser because he's not letting that effort go to waste. Changes controller based on who he's racing, to "make it easier for you". Prefers the GameCube controller

Sam: Rarely ever places below 4th. She also grew up on this game through the Washingtons and has lots of fond memories spending sleepovers with it and the siblings. She's very humble, and doesn't usually say anything when getting 1st. She grins though (Josh loves that grin). Always down for battle mode! Plays with the Wii remote + nunchuck

Chris: Winning the custody battle over Rosalina with Emily. Usually when Em is also playing he doesn't get first dibs. So he goes Waluigi and mimics him every time he has a voice line. Funny at first but now it drives everyone (except Josh who joins in) insane. More and more often Em lets him have Rosalina just to spare herself from the constant Waluigi impressions. He's either really good or really bad depending on the tracks and typical MKWii luck. Goes for super fast vehicles with like no other good stats and either flies through courses and has super easy victories or has the worst time and comes dead last. Uses the GameCube controller

Ashley: Bad luck magnet. Hit by every shell. Trips on every banana. Once she used a bullet while over a gap and it just carried her into the abyss instead of saving her. She hasn't let this go and it happened 2 years ago. Vibes with Toadette and chooses her in any game she's an option. Also prefers coin runners and is usually content to just watch the others play. Another Wii wheel user!

Emily: Losing the custody battle over Rosalina with Chris. Goes with Birdo as an alternative. Is arguably even better when playing her. She was immediately amazing the first time she played. Gets really really competitive and Beth and Josh love the challenge and the intensity that comes with Emily's gloating and high confidence. Doesn't play the game outside of when at the Washington's but knows a good few shortcuts and tricks because she spent hours looking into it when she got home to ensure victory in the future. Plays with the Wii classic controller

Matt: Likes balloon battle and always pushes for team racing. Pretty average player. His character/kart combo is so light that he often gets bumped onto the off-road and pits, but he refuses to change. That's just a little guy right there in his little car! Something Matt appreciates. Really really insane on Rainbow Road for some reason. While being a Wii wheel user! Beth and Josh don't get how that's possible and hype him up every time

Mike: (Unknowingly at first) uses the best character/kart combo. Still gets 6th or lower 74% of the time. Always really cocky for some reason. Uses the plain Wii remote without the wheel (where is your whimsy, Michael?)

Jess: She got 1st once and brings this up any time anyone makes fun of her for hitting every possible obstacle. Still usually does better than Mike and is super vocal while playing, commenting on everything that happens. Wii remote + nunchuck

[heideez]

stan and ford both smoke.

(a mini-fic, cw: sh & suicidal ideation)

they started when they were fourteen. caryn would always send stanley to the store for smokes, back then. she had been since he was small, so the clerks at the corner store recognized him, didn’t question his age when buying them, just waved him on. the twins smoked the cigarettes in the alley outside the pawn shop, coughing and sputtering and stanley, why did you make us do this? ford, it was your idea!

by the time they’re eighteen they’re certainly used to it. by the time they’re twenty their hands shake if they go too long without it.

cigs are easy to steal, for stan—snag ‘em from the outside pocket of a purse, the lining of some john’s jacket. it’s a habit he can keep up, a small comfort, a reminder of home.

ford chain-smokes between his classes, on the balcony of his college apartment, in the middle of the night at his desk, stubbed out on paper plates of abandoned food.

they’re twenty-eight, and their hands both shake even with the nicotine.

dozens of crumpled packs line the backseat of stanley’s diablo. his arms are lined with circular burns.

ford tried to quit, a few years back, but now he can’t imagine doing so. the cigarettes help keep him awake, and he can’t sleep.

isolation-imposed nicotine withdrawal is not a pleasant experience for either twin.

at the dusk 2’ dawn, armed with the cash of strangers he’s just promised something he doesn’t have (what else is new), stanley wonders if stanford pines would still smoke. the agony of the thought nearly brings him to his knees.

smoking would inhibit peak performance; ford thinks to himself as parallel fiddleford extends the pack towards him. would i want to lose to bill, give over the multiverse, because my lungs weren’t operating at full capacity? i think not.

funny enough, that’s not why ford loses to bill after all.

quit for dipper and mabel. stan will allow himself to break his rule, just this once—if he’s going to be homeless again, going to lose everything…why the hell not? not like he’ll be around as a role model much longer. he puffs twice, convinces himself the kids will smell it, and stubs the cigar out onto his thigh.

ford smells tobacco out on the porch of the sh—his lab. he’s sure it’s stan. who else would be up in the wee hours of the night, smoking? with children in the house, too. typical. ford ignores his various cravings, (including the ones that build pressure behind his eyes, in his chest, when he sees stanley hug the children, speak to them like he cares), and forces himself back down into the lab.

then the world falls apart and stitches itself back together, and stan is blown apart and stitched back together, and they are stitched back together.

ford worries about stanley’s health, now, how many years he’s spent beating his body up and not taking care of himself. stanley, he admonishes in his best lecture voice, i won’t have you picking that habit back up. nothing is taking him away from ford again, especially not a pair of stupid lungs. stan just grins at him—and ford never could control his brother, really.

fuck it, give me a cigarette, he spits one night, coming to stand beside a shaking stanley. both of them had had nightmares that night, ugly memories and haunting laughs rearing their heads. stan looked shocked at his sudden request, but then he threw his head back in delirious laughter. they light the cigs, smoke them like old times. it’s been a while—ford coughs, turning bright red. urgh, lee! why’d you make me do this?

[newtonsheffield]

omg baby neddy and Edwina concerts 🥺 do any of the other kids take an interest in music? Is Ben hella jealous because he can't compete as an uncle against an electric guitar? Does Edwina have a video of Anthony pretending to be a rockstar for blackmail that she ends up sharing anyway bc she cant resist? Down the line, if Josie never caves, does she give Edwina the ultimatum of garage studio or moving in with her (we know the obvious choice)?

Little Neddy is too young to really play the guitar but he likes to stand in front of Edwina who holds down the strings and he strums a little. He also likes to stands in front of Edwina’s band and dance while they play wearing his little blue duffle coat.

Edwina loves having this over Benedict. Benedict can add all the pages he wants into Hairy Maclary, can he let Neddy play the drums? Can he sing the Daddy and Amma song? No. Useless.

Edwina’s also… a liiiitle bit aware of how pictures of her with Neddy on Instagram usually gets her DMs absolutely flooded with invitations of all sorts.

Josie knows how to kill two birds with one stone, meanwhile. She has plans drawn up for her own house to have the garage converted to a studio but she thought it’d be funny to ask Edwina.

“So I’ve decided you can have your studio.”

Edwina nearly fell off her chair, “What?!”

“You can have your studio or you can move in with me.”

Edwina paused, narrowing her eyes at her girlfriend.

“Stop thinking about it.” Josie sighed, “Just move on with me.”

Edwina sighed, stepping into Josie’s arms. “Being married to a politician is going to ruin my reputation.”

“Who said we were getting married?”

Edwina rolled her eyes, “If we’re living together we’re basically married. Get used to being my wife.”

“You could just ask me.”

“Nope. We also need to get you a new oven. Because I cannot cook on that monstrosity.”

“Yes, Honey.”

[ilikekidsshows]

This is related to something mentioned on one of your asks (apologies if you did talk about it and I just didn't understand) but do you think calling Adrien a sexual harasser is comparable to calling Marinette a bad leader in terms of criticizing characters?

--

This is literally what I meant with my big rant on people who use “it's all just bad writing” to sweep aside bigger and bigger problems with the show. We're all used to excusing some level of bad writing from this show, but, like, usually people have a threshold for how much bullshit they're willing to swallow. I could excuse Cat Noir not getting the hint, just like I could excuse Marinette following Adrien everywhere and knowing his schedule (this is the actual equivalent point of comparison). They were quirky about it. Ladynoir was mutually flirty even if Cat Noir was too serious with it sometimes, and Marinette's nonsense was often funny. I mostly treated the stalker/harasser takes as opinions. I could see why people would view the characters that way, but I could see enough outside it to look past it. It was beneath my bullshit threshold.

“Marinette does practically everything wrong on screen but we praise her for things she didn't do so she did everything right actually” is past my bullshit threshold. You can't show the exact opposite of what you mean on screen and then claim something different is going on. Ladybug treats her teammates with different expectations, her rules are situational and conditional, she picks favorites, she keeps valuable information from her teammates, making it harder for them to do their jobs. Her failures directly lead to bad consequences. But, because she cried about it and was instantly forgiven while taking no steps to improve, that means she's actually the greatest superhero and leader ever. Like, that's a big plate full of bullshit and I’m done eating it.

Also, like, we really need to take the level of my personal betrayal into account when it comes to willingness to swallow bullshit. Like, Marinette being a bad leader and a terrible hero wouldn't bother me nearly as much if she wasn't also an abuse apologist. Marinette, when faced with the choice between doing what Adrien's abuser wanted and considering literally anyone else's opinion on what Adrien might need or want, picked the abuser’s opinion. Marinette picked Adrien's abuser over him. Like, if that hadn't happened, I wouldn't be near this angry. If Astruc hadn't smugly tweeted about how perfectly this decision ties in with her choice in The Bubbler, retroactively ruining one of my favorite episodes for me, I wouldn't be looking back at all of Marinette's failings and seeing how they led her to that moment. The writers practically invited me to do so. Even fans who still adore the show and Marinette think Marinette turning to abuse apologia makes sense. A lot of Marinette's character flaws lead to her making that choice.

Stalking Adrien > disregard towards Adrien's personhood > not considering what Adrien would want when she makes excuses for Gabriel

Lying/secret-keeping > constantly keeping things from people when the truth makes her uncomfortable or look bad > lies about Gabriel because she thinks it will make Adrien's emotional reaction less volatile

Repeatedly insisting kids are safe with their parents regardless of evidence to the contrary > discounting victims’ testimonies > trusting Gabriel's opinion on how Adrien should be treated

Unequal leadership > treating people as objects to be controlled instead of equals to negotiate with > thinking she even has the right to lie to Adrien about his dad

As you can see, a lot of the patterns of Marinette's flaws lean on attitudes that explain almost too perfectly why Marinette would trust Adrien's confirmed abuser's opinion on things relating to Adrien, even when she sees the sensory deprivation chamber Gabriel put Adrien in. Almost all of the bad writing choices regarding Marinette now connect to one of the worst, if not the worst, moments of the entire series so far. And, because it's all so interconnected and all-encopassing to Marinette's character now that I can't just ignore it. I can't ignore any part of it. The writers are making me question Marinette's integrity all the way back in the first season, because many of her flaws were already established from the start of the series.

In addition to all this, Miraculous functions on Protagonist-Centered Morality, aka, the things the protagonist does are meant to be seen as the morally good thing to do or at least a valid choice even when the consequences are "unexpectedly" bad. Adrien’s “harassment” is never framed as the right way to act, but Marinette’s abuse apologia, disrespect of Adrien’s personhood and abuses of power as team leader are all treated as morally being on the same ground as not doing those things. “Lying to him or telling him the truth will lead to very different consequences with their share of happy and sad moments,” my ass.

Adrien being a sexual harasser, Marinette being a stalker, Marinette being a bad leader and hero and Marinette’s abuse apologia are all bad writing, but not all bad writing is written equally bad, if you catch my drift.

[velvetvexations]

It's frustrating when any radical feminism is called out in trans circles, the whole thing is "well since I'm trans I can't be a TERF"!!! Like, transmisogyny is not the only thing TERFS and radical feminists preach?? Like if you're anti sex work, anti kink, anti bodily autonomy for any kind of transition or sex, think men (whoever the individual bigot defines as such) are genetically predisposed to evil, think women (whoever the individual bigot defines as such) are predisposed to good, and anti-ace/aro people, like one or two differences in opinion will not preclude you from radical feminism. Idk, out of the "trans inclusionary" radical feminists, I feel as though you either fall hard into transmisogyny or transandrophobia.

But a lot of the people who believe in all the same things as the normal strain of radical feminism but support trans women just,, only seem to think that transmisogyny is what TERFs preach?

Also like lowkey I never understood the Shinigami eyes extension because TERF dogwhistles are kinda easy to spot and easy to check. Like, overly judgmental of a random woman? Overly judgmental of a random man? Seems to think x kink is evil? Implying porn is disgusting and evil (without any actual criticisms of the industry, just talking about it inherently)? Weird about ace/aro people and their attraction or lack thereof? Wow! Probably a terf.

I think there is some issue with "OP is a TERF" that made shinigami eyes appealing for a lot of people. I once saw someone make a really good point about how a theater production that sexualizes nuns is not progressive for sexualizing women who don't want to be sexualized, but whoops, OP was a TERF. Often moral rationality is not an issue of logical reasoning as it is motivation. For instance, I also saw a tankie shitheel give a pretty good rundown of Chiquita's bullshit in Central and Southern America. In both cases, Bad Group A was opposed to Bad Group B, whether that be imperialism or the patriarchy, so they can call out legitimate issues when they want to before going right back to complete bullshit and supporting their own evil shit.

But absolutely no one actually knows what TERFs are anymore because they do think it's literally all just hating trans women and are incapable of connecting the dots between TERFs and second-wave feminism, and realizing that they have a whole suite of beliefs that goes beyond that. It's partly obscured nowadays for exactly the reason that they'll often be aimed at cis men, which TRFs simply don't count as evidence of them hating men because of course you should be against like, Cis Male Celebrity Getting #MeToo'd, as though the issue with TERFs isn't that they see that and trans people as being products of the same patriarchal system because their view of the entire world is warped.

Especially funny is the claim that you can't call TRFs TRFs because they don't self-identify as TRFs. I mean, even putting aside Talia Bhatt's book, we have a very famous meme of Sonic the Hedgehog telling TERFs to fuck off for using that exact same "that's just a slur to silence me" argument. Like, no! You may not recognize what you're saying is nearly identical to everything TERFs say just because you add "trans" behind "women," but that's a you problem!

[stxrslutrestored]

SURPRISE

pairing; sarah cameron x bi!reader

summary; whilst you adore your relationship with sarah, and you wouldn’t trade it in for the world, there is one thing that you miss about men.. dick. luckily for you, your girlfriend is innovative, and she comes up with the perfect solution to get you that dick, without having to deal with any testosterone whatsoever 

content; strap

authors note; re upload!

“are you nearly done?” you call to your girlfriend who is in the bathroom preparing some sort of surprise. 

she calls back, “one second…” her voice drips with concentration, “this surprise is… hard to get on.” 

you have no idea what it is, only that it’s something sexual supposedly. given that sarah had told you to wear some nice underwear, strip all your other clothes and wait for her on the bed. 

after a minute of happy suspense the bathroom door clicks and you sit up in anticipation to finally see what the surprise is.

she steps out, a big grin on her face as she poses with jazz hands up. you see it immediately, a strap on, she’s wearing a strap on, and nothing but a strap on. it’s pink and glittery, matching the essence of the rest of your bedroom. you can’t help but giggle. 

“oh my god,” your eyebrows raise and you smile. you know why she did this. over the past few weeks you’d been openly craving dick. an urge that sarah had been so sad not to satisfy.

“ta daa!” she grins, walking up to the bed, “what do you think? I think it suits me.” when she reaches you she poses again, hands on her hips. the sudden movement makes the toy wobble like jelly, which is just downright funny. 

“it definitely suits you.” you giggle, getting up on your knees so that your faces can be level, “I think we should take it for a spin.” you smile, wrapping your arms around her neck. 

she nods, “oh yeah, i think so too. totally. you know why don’t we just—” she cuts herself off when she takes your hips and purposefully falls with you onto the bed, landing on top of you. 

you move up with her, adjusting yourself to lay with your head on the pillow whilst her hands run down your body. 

“you dressed up,” she remarks, snapping the waistband of your panties playfully before pulling them down. 

“you told me to,” you remark back. you arch your back when her two fingers come into contact with your clit and rub a gentle spiral. 

sarah grins down at you, “I had to read up on this, y'know.. so.. apparently I’m supposed to get you wet, and then use that.. kinda like lube.. think you can get wet for me?” 

you nod, “think I can, if I try real hard.” you giggle again and she nods along with you, continuing to rub your bundle of nerves with skill. 

“yeah. I think you can too.” she leans down to peck you on the nose affectionately. she slips two more fingers into you whilst the other two keep rubbing you. it doesn’t take long to get you plenty lubricated. 

she pushes herself up, “okay.. let’s give this a shot.” she sticks her tongue out just a little bit in concentration, you think it’s so cute when she does that. 

slowly but surely she lines it up and then pushes into you. you gasp, the stretch is quite big, considering you haven’t actually been penetrated like this in god knows how long. you appreciate it though, despite the small amount of pain, this is exactly what you’d been craving.

“oh,” you moan immediately, hands coming up to wrap around her shoulders. your hips move up and you throw your head back. 

“wow.” she chuckles, “I’m not even moving yet.. good to know it’s not a tough crowd.” and with that comment she does start to move. 

it’s a bit slow and shaky at first as she gets used to operating the new appendage, but it gets better quickly and soon you’re wondering why you ever dated men in the first place if the substitute is this good. 

“d’you like it?” she asks you, looking down hopefully, “am I doing it right?” she tilts her head. her speech is huffy, she’s a little out of breath. 

“yeah,” you whimper, “doing it so right— god!” you cry out as she hits your g spot. 

she giggles, “just me.” that’s her favourite joke, like ever. you find it so unfunny but right now you absolutely are not going to complain, she’s making you feel so good. 

she keeps going, she’s a natural at this, you could easily forget that this isn’t a real dick. if she had a real dick, she’d be good at it. 

your legs come up to wrap around her middle as you get closer to a climax, the new position only pushes her to improve and within seconds she’s hitting that spot with every single thrust. 

you cry and moan and practically scream as your orgasm finally crashes over you and it is a good one. you squirm and writhe, hips bucking to meet hers. 

she stays in you for a minute, letting you ride out the blissful feeling. once you’re all done you fall back and then your eyes snap open. 

“you didn’t pull out!” you panic slightly, looking up at her, and then it dawns on you. 

“yeah,” she chuckles, pulling away from you, “silicone can’t get you pregnant baby. don’t you worry.” 

[burins]

I read a LOT of books this year, which is always exciting. I also neglected to do much in the way of write ups during the year proper, so here are little opinions about all 84(!) book-books I read. I love to yap about what I read and I would love to talk about any and all of these. (Graphic novels and comics are gonna be their own post because there are also too many of those.) Bold are my top faves, headphones are things I read as audiobooks.

JAN

Less - Andrew Sean Greer

Shockingly funny book on a writer’s midlife gay crisis. I was a little mid on the end but the prose here was fantastic.

The Bullet Journal Method: Track the Past, Order the Present, Design the Future - Ryder Carroll

Beyond Bullets: Creative Journaling Ideas to Customize Your Personal Productivity System - Megan Rutell

Read about a million of these for a program; this was the only one worth recommending if you want to try journaling. (The official guide is Fine but it throws a lot at you at once.)

The 365 Bullet Guide: Organize Your Life Creatively, One Day at a Time - Zennor Compton

Lettering for Planners: A Step- - -Step Guide to Hand Lettering and Modern Calligraphy for Bullet Journals and Beyond - Jordan Truster and Jillian Reece

This should not have been a book.

Afterparties: Stories - Anthony Veasna So

I’ve been meaning to read this for years and years-- So was a friend of a friend-- and it was as excellent as I expected, and also made me tremendously sad that we won’t get more writing from him. 

Disfigured: On Fairy Tales, Disability, and Making Space - Amanda Leduc 🎧

This is theory for a general audience but I still wished it was more robust-- Leduc’s arguments had about the academic rigor of a tumblr post, which is a shame.

Aftermath: Life in the Fallout of the Third Reich, 1945–1955 - Harald Jähner 🎧

Nation-making and identity formation in the aftermath of fascism. There has been a lot of writing about the German project of the post-Nazi era, but this was a very solid read.

Water and Salt - Lena Khalaf Tuffaha

I came across Tuffaha’s gut-punch of a poem, “Running Orders,” online, and while the rest of the collection doesn’t always hit as hard, it’s still fantastic.

Bring Up the Bodies - Hilary Mantel 🎧

Reading this and The Mirror and the Light at the beginning of the year really ruined me for all other prose for the entirety of 2024, tbh. Nobody does it like Mantel.

Bandits, Misfits, and Superheroes: Whiteness and Its Borderlands in American Comics and Graphic Novels - Josef Benson and Doug Singsen

After reading Birds of Prey in October-December I really wanted to read some writing on whiteness in comics. This didn’t touch on what I was most interested in exploring and I did come away from the book thinking damn. None of that book was nearly as good as Tony Wei Ling’s fantastic piece on Crumb and alt-comics’ self-hagiography in SOLRAD.

Mending with Boro - Harumi Horiuchi

Make and Mend: Sashiko-Inspired Embroidery Projects to Customize and Repair Textiles and Decorate Your Home - Jessica Marquez

Mend!: A Refashioning Manual and Manifesto - Kate Sekules

Mending with Love: Creative Repairs for Your Favorite Things - Noriko Misumi

Mend It, Wear It, Love It!: Stitch Your Way to a Sustainable Wardrobe - Zoe Edwards

Can you tell I taught a visible mending class in February? Honestly any one of these are a good pick if you’re wanting to get into visible mending. This is the best for giving you a whole menu of techniques to choose from and having very accessible instructions.

Modern Mending - Erin Lewis-Fitzgerald

Mending Matters: Stitch, Patch, and Repair Your Favorite Denim & More - Katrina Rodabaugh

Creative Mending: Beautiful Darning, Patching and Stitching Techniques - Hikaru Noguchi

This is the best one for getting into the ethos of visible mending. It’s a deeply kind book.

Joyful Mending: Visible Repairs for the Perfectly Imperfect Things We Love! - Noriko Misumi

Visible Mending: A Modern Guide to Darning, Stitching and Patching the Clothes You Love - Arounna Khounnoraj

The Mirror and the Light - Hilary Mantel 🎧

Once again. Nobody is doing it like Hilary Mantel.

FEB

Finna - Nino Cipri 🎧

Anticapitalist multiverse Ikea relationship drama should have been my entire jam but this book was simply quite bad.

Weapons of Math Destruction: How Big Data Increases Inequality and Threatens Democracy - Cathy O’Neil 🎧

Are you ready to get depressed about data? This is a great book for your liberal mom. I could wish it were more anticarceral but for what it’s actually covering it does a great job.

Vegetables Love Flowers: Companion Planting for Beauty and Bounty - Lisa Mason Ziegler

Garden planning :) 

Flux - Jinwoo Chong 🎧

If you liked Severance (the show) or have ever projected some identity feelings onto a not-very-good TV show, this is a book for you. Imperfect pacing but still gripping, and I’m excited to see what Chong does next-- this is his first book.

Ocean’s Echo - Everina Maxwell

The premise of this book is simply so sexy. And overall the book is too!

The Imposition of Unnecessary Obstacles - Malka Older

Yayyyy Mossa and Pleiti return! I love this series and I loved this book.

A Land with a People: Palestinians and Jews Confront Zionism edited - Rosalind Pollack Petchesky, Esther Farmer, & Sarah Sills

I don't really have a write up for this. It's powerful and well written and I would recommend it.

Black Paper: Writing in a Dark Time - Teju Cole

Best book I read all year, frankly. Teju Cole writes about art and culture and being alive when the world is falling apart like nobody else.

MAR

The Deepest South of All: True Stories from Natchez, Mississippi - Richard Grant 🎧

Oh you hate to see a British guy get sucked in by white Southern niceness. (Richard Grant, in this case, is the British guy.) A lot of the stories in this were excellent but Grant gives way too much credit to folks clinging to the tattered remnants of the Old South.

Ottoman Brothers: Muslims, Christians, and Jews in Early Twentieth-Century Palestine - Michelle U. Campos

Excellent historical antidote to the idea of perpetual struggle in Palestine. Also interesting read just for looking at how citizens of Jerusalem were using national and imperial identities for their political agendas at the time.

An Immense World: How Animal Senses Reveal the Hidden Realms Around Us - Ed Yong 🎧

Lovely book that resists anthropomorphism and rendered me a font of “hey babe can I tell you a cool snake fact?” for about three weeks. 

The Barbizon: The Hotel That Set Women Free - Paulina Bren 🎧

You know I should have expected a book like this to be exactly what it was and yet. In addition to the sort of milquetoast stabs at feminism the structure is bad-- it devolves into Sylvia Plath’s life story and doesn’t really recover. I don’t mind reading a book about Sylvia Plath but I would like to plan to do that going in. 

The Hunter - Tana French

Only Tana can manage to write a book that is mostly just pretty normal conversations for 75% of its runtime and yet made me unbelievably stressed the whole time I was reading. Creeping dread! We love it.

Shades of Grey - Jasper Fforde

I last read this in high school when I was so excited to see that the sequel would be coming out any day now. Over a decade later, any day at last arrived! So it was time for a reread. The sexual politics of this book are insane, which I didn’t pick up on in 10th grade, but it is still an extremely clever and enjoyable book.

Rabid: A Cultural History of the World's Most Diabolical Virus - Bill Wasik 🎧

I learned a lot of fun facts in this book but it was rambling and also I do wish books like this would stop trying to overstate the importance of their topic. Rabies can’t be the source of vampire legends AND zombie legends AND werewolves. (Zombies in particular. We know where those come from and it ain’t rabies!)

The Transcriptionist - Amy Rowland 🎧

As a former transcriptionist the idea of a mystery that revolves around the intrinsic weirdness of being the fly on the wall was very appealing to me! This wasn’t quite the book I thought it was but I still enjoyed it. 

City Editor - Stanley Walker

If you can ignore the amount of name-dropping of people who were certainly famous in 1934 newsrooms but I have certainly never heard of, there are definitely some amusing anecdotes. Walker writes with a dynamism and bombast I would love to see in any kind of writing nowadays. However it is also a book written - a newspaperman in 1934 so it does hit every single -ism like it’s trying to get a pinball high score.

The Times: How the Newspaper of Record Survived Scandal, Scorn, and the Transformation of Journalism - Adam Nagourney 🎧

This book is exceedingly kind to the NYT and it was wild to read this the month that the Hamas mass rape story very publicly fell apart. However reading it did give me a very clear picture of how that story, and stories like it, happened in the first place. 

Chasing History: A Kid in the Newsroom - Carl Bernstein 🎧

Of all the “how do newspapers work?” books I read in March-April to prep for a fic I didn’t end up being able to write, this was my favorite. Bernstein is an engaging narrator and this answered my questions about how a story actually happens (particularly pre-internet.)

APR

Beacons in the Darkness: Hope and Transformation Among America's Community Newspapers - Dave Hoekstra

This ping-pongs between case studies in a way that would be totally fine in a feature story and is unforgivable in a book. But the case studies are interesting!

Newsroom Confidential: Lessons (and Worries) from an Ink-Stained Life - Margaret Sullivan

This is more memoir than NYT hagiography, and thus I enjoyed it much more.

Ocean’s Godori - Elaine Cho

I’ve got to stop reading SFF that came out this year. Unfortunately, it is part of my job to be aware of SFF that comes out this year. The pacing on this was UNBELIEVABLY sick-- the inciting plot incident only occurred halfway through the book, and the first 60 pages were us being fairly clumsily introduced to too many characters. The author’s end notes effusively thanked her editor and I think she should not have done that because a really solid editing job could have made this into something I really enjoyed. (People who work in publishing I’m sorry about publishing.)

Bombshell - Sarah MacLean

If your whole plot is going to hinge on a Deep Dark Secret, it better be deep and dark. 

Time's Echo: The Second World War, the Holocaust, and the Music of Remembrance - Jeremy Eichler 🎧

I got this for my grandma for Christmas and that was a mistake because this book is so depressing. If I had thought for two seconds I would have known this! However. I did like it! 

MAY

JUN

Desegregating Comics: Debating Blackness in the Golden Age of American Comics - Qiana Whitted

Really loved this one. 

Super Bodies: Comic Book Illustration, Artistic Styles, and Narrative Impact - Jeffrey A. Brown

This book would have been fantastic if the author had a) had any art historical or visual analysis training and b) done research about manga and the ways its styles have been used in the west. As neither of those were true this book mostly made me wish it was another, better book. Good comics recs though. 

Red Side Story - Jasper Fforde

Long-awaited sequel! This is an entirely solid book, though I wish I could have read it when I was a teen because it would have rocked my shit then. 

JULY

The Ladies Rewrite the Rules - Suzanne Allain

Really the only thing you need to know about this Regency #girlboss book is that at the very end of the book, which made almost no pretenses to historical accuracy wrt attitudes about gender roles, the main narrative tension is the love interest’s plans to go off with the East India Company to make his fortune. The other characters have no moral qualms about this; it’s proposed with the same air that a modern book would talk about someone going to college across the country. It made me feel completely insane. 

Escape Velocity - Victor Manibo

You know when you read a book and you say wow, I can’t wait to watch this as a Netflix special, but boy was it not very good as a book? That. Also I really wish we had spent more than about two scenes with the servants on the space hotel, so that I could care about them as people and not as plot devices!

Making Our Future: Visionary Folklore and Everyday Culture in Appalachia - Emily Hilliard

Engaging stories of modern West Virginia.

Belonging: A Culture of Place - bell hooks

The writing on exile in this did make me cry while I was eating lunch.

AUG

Appalachia on the Table: Representing Mountain Food and People - Erica Adams Locklear

More historical than I expected but solid writing on how perception of food affects perception of people.

What You Are Looking For is in the Library - Michiko Aoyama

I really didn’t expect this to get me but I am not immune to lovely, small-scale stories of people being kind to one another in community. Teared up on desk. 

SEPT

Watercolor Is for Everyone: Simple Lessons to Make Your Creative Practice a Daily Habit - Kateri Ewing

This was for a class and everyone liked the class! 

Hot Summer - Elle Everhart

I am so hit or miss on contemporary romance. This was a messy, delightful reality show romp. Light on drama, but the robust character relationships are the star of the show.

Loving Mountains, Loving Men - Jeff Mann

The poems here are generally better than the prose, which gets a bit repetitive at times. The poems are also generally very good, and a few of them made me cry. 

Second Night Stand - Karelia and Fay Stetz-Waters

I wish I had known going in that the authors were a married couple looking to tell “a story about a healthy queer romance.” All love to them, but I am simply not very interested in reading a story that bills itself that way! And as you might imagine there was a lot of therapy speak and very little narrative tension. Sex scenes were great, though, and if you want a very queer comfort read you might enjoy this. 

You Should Be So Lucky - Cat Sebastian

Very chewy character relationships. Sebastian manages to tell a story that feels of its time (1950s sports/journalism) while not being deeply bleak, which is a balance that many many queer historical romances completely bomb.

Lady Eve's Last Con - Rebecca Fraimow

Delightful lesbian screwball comedy. In space! 

OCT

Slippery Creatures - KJ Charles

The Sugared Game - KJ Charles

Subtle Blood - KJ Charles

Imagine if Lord Peter Wimsey had a passionate love affair with a gruff and tortured soldier recently back from WWI. That’s basically these books and I inhaled them. Shout out to detectorist for the rec!

The No-Show - Beth O’Leary 🎧

About 60% of the way through this book, I said, oh man, I hope that the twist to this book isn’t [redacted]. That would make me so mad. Well, it was, and it did! 

Drunk on All Your Strange New Words - Eddie Robson 🎧

Scratched the itch for sci-fi mystery, and the premise is fantastic. The narrator does a mostly excellent job but her American accents are distractingly bad, so if that will bother you read the book.

Deviant Hollers: Queering Appalachian Ecologies for a Sustainable Future edited - Zane McNeill and Rebecca Scott

Most of the essays in this are great! Every so often I get in my head about whether I can claim an Appalachian or Southern identity and whether I should do any writing on the subject. And then I read an essay that makes a lot of claims about “I centralize queer, trans, rural southern voices” and then does not proceed to actually demonstrate how they are doing any of that work, and go oh wait I’m actually fine. 

NOV

Better the Blood - Michael Bennett 🎧

A pretty solid thriller elevated by a very solid conceit: a Maori detective is investigating modern-day killings connected to a 19th century execution of a Maori chief by a group of British soldiers. This suffered a little from being written by a screenwriter who very clearly had certain shots in mind while writing (sometimes that works in prose, sometimes it doesn’t) and also from periodic intercut scenes from the killer’s POV (also a convention that works better in TV) which did undercut whodunit tension. Also the main character is a cop. But I ended up finding her sympathetic, which is a HUGE ask given the subject matter. 

The Stars Too Fondly - Emily Hamilton 🎧

Hated this. I tried to be measured in my initial review but every single part of this book was simply so bad. I wish I had those 11 hours of my life back. If this author is your friend I apologize, and also I hope she didn’t base a character on you, because every character in this book acts like a 15yo.  

Appalachian Reckoning: A Region Responds to Hillbilly Elegy edited by Meredith McCarroll & Anthony Harkins

I worked my way through my own booklist this fall and this was one of the best books on it. I kept trying to put it on display at the library but our copy was checked out the entire time. Give this to your uncle who won’t shut up about Ohio. 

The Pairing - Casey McQuiston 🎧

First half of this was way more compelling than I expected it to be, and then McQuiston makes the WILD choice to switch POVs entirely and permanently halfway through the book. And I found the second character pretentious and given to fits of purple prose (he describes the first character as a “superbloom” at one point and also won’t shut up about the most art history 101 pieces of art) so I did not particularly enjoy the book as a whole. I will give it points though for having a pretty non-cringey “hi i’m actually nonbinary” conversation, which is astonishingly rare.

Jonny Appleseed - Joshua Whitehead

This was initially a book club pick for a meeting that didn’t end up happening, which is a bummer because I would like to talk about this book with more people! A lot of lines in this are going to stick with me-- Whitehead shifts through time and place with deftness and grace. If you like K-Ming Chang’s Bestiary I think you will enjoy this-- Whitehead revels in the body in a similar way.  

I Heard Her Call My Name: A Memoir of Transition - Lucy Sante 🎧

If you’re not already a little familiar with the NYC art scene in the 70s and 80s you may not enjoy this, because Sante name-drops a lot. I am, and I loved it-- it’s a lovely meditation on growing old and hitting your breaking point. Sante is also a fantastic writer, and this is an excellent counterbalance to the particular type of trans writing that is very very common online. (Nothing wrong with that writing, but you need a balanced diet.)

The Village Library Demon-Hunting Society - CM Waggoner

I loved Waggoner’s previous books and I did end up enjoying this one a lot! It’s an enjoyable send-up of the cozy mystery genre.

Regarding the Pain of Others - Susan Sontag

A reread for my yaoi zine piece! Not only does this still hit but I think it’s a particularly apt piece of writing to be reading right now, when we are daily surrounded - images of suffering. Sontag, as ever, does not have any neat answers for us, but she does make you think more deeply about the world that surrounds you.

DEC

How to Tell When We Will Die: On Pain, Disability, and Doom - Johanna Hedva 🎧

I loved parts of this, and I hated other parts, which for me is a good sign about a book of theory. I have more thoughts about disability activism and being online that don’t fit into a quick write-up for a book. 

Ramp Hollow: The Ordeal of Appalachia - Stephen Stoll

This took me six months to read, but mostly because I was reading it occasionally on desk and I kept having to return the ebook. It demands a little bit more sustained attention than I was giving it! It’s an excellent overview of the history of land use in Appalachia through the 1930s and it gave me a lot of good context for the mountains I grew up under. 

The Forbidden Book - Sacha Lamb 🎧

Unfortunately, I think I would have liked this a lot more if I hadn’t read When The Angels Left the Old Country first! It’s a perfectly nice YA story-- but it definitely feels YA, and I don’t tend to enjoy reading a lot of YA.

Come Fly the World: The Jet-Age Story of the Women of Pan Am - Julia Cooke 🎧

I still don’t really know how I feel about this book. It does avoid some of the pitfalls of #girlboss nonfiction, but also it falls right into others. Mostly I wish it had engaged really at all with the people these women met on their travels, or like. Literally anyone Vietnamese. 

Exile and Pride: Disability, Queerness, and Liberation - Eli Clare

Oof ouch my bones!!! This hits on a lot and does it with incredible grace.

To Say Nothing of the Dog - Connie Willis🎧

I wish my grandma was still alive so I could recommend this to her, because she would have adored it. Delightful time travel Victoriana. 

The Message - Ta-Nehisi Coates 🎧

I really admire the move of making the entire second half of your highly anticipated book about the injustices you saw in Palestine, and I hope it pays off and every NPR listener who loved Between the World and Me picks this up and reads to the end. 

Everyone in this Room Will Someday Be Dead by Emily Austin

This book reads like a 200-page panic attack, which is not a diss! Really revels in the situational hilarity of anxiety/OCD/something unspecified.

Rules for Ghosting by Shelly Jay Shore

Okay I had to add this one in because I finished it after making my post. This book (contemporary queer Jewish romance with a bit of the supernatural) was so lovely and deeply felt and often laugh out loud funny. The family relationships are the real star although the romance is also very sweet.

[literary-illuminati]

2024 Book Review #70 – Absolution by Jeff Vandermeer

New additions to a series a decade after it concluded don’t have a particularly good track record at living up to the quality of the originals – far too often they just read as commentaries on the series’ fanbase or pop culture reception, and that’s if they escape being a transparent case of giving the fans slop for a quick paycheck. This is even more the case when the originals are a tightly interconnected trilogy with an extremely definitive conclusion.

All to say, I received the news that Jeff Vandermeer was writing a new Southern Reach book with a mixture of excitement and trepidation. Excitement, because Annihilation might actually be one of my favorite works of the 21st century and the whole trilogy holds a deeply and irrationally precious space in my heart. Trepidation because – well everything I just said. Thankfully, this was far more good than bad – not Annihilation, and it didn’t need to be basically as long as the entire original trilogy combined, but absolutely met my expectations of beautifully described cosmic and psychological horror and indecipherable mindfucks in gorgeously uncanny locales.

The book’s a hard one to describe – the plot is twisting and opaque, the narrators thoroughly unreliable – but it’s (not exactly but nearly) a prequel to the original Southern Reach Trilogy, following first events in the Forgotten Coast in the lead-up to the Border falling, and then the very first expedition sent across it into the newly-named Area X in the months after. Though it’s really divided into three-ish parts rather than two – first we get a vivid picture of Old Jim (our first POV) recovering from his life collapsing into a gutter and researching the confused and redacted records of a very Cold War CIA science experiment on the Coast years prior and how it all went horribly wrong, before journeying to the Coast himself in the weeks and days before it becomes Area X to try and discover what happened. Exactly one character from this section also shows up on page in part 3, though the neither the reader nor the new POV is aware of her continuity until quite late in the game. Which is funny, given that despite neither protagonist ever really understanding her, Cass has the most complete character arc of anyone in the whole book.

This is a book very concerned with language and perception – how you can’t trust them, how they can control you, how the right words whispered in your ear can shatter everything you ever were. Language is a parasite that needs a host; the song stuck in your head reinforces the compulsions you don’t even realize you’re obeying. The theme runs thick through the entire book, and shows up more ways than I can count. I did particularly like how it’s specifically the beautiful things – the poetry, music and cryptic little koans, the fields of wildflowers and the awe-inspiring autumn storm – that are the dangers, that might entrap and break you. Even the protagonists’ internal monologues shift as their minds become more and more captured by whatever motive force drives Area X, their descriptions and use of imagery more elevated and poetic as they get further from whatever humanity is.

Not that Area X is the sole source of identity-rupturing and mind-stealing horror, here. Old Jim and Lowry are both agents of Central, the opaque intelligence agency that control the Southern Reach in the original trilogy. Both have been broken and remade by it, their minds stuffed to bursting with hypnotic conditioning and trigger words in case they ever get distracted or prove to be unreliable. Not that anyone seems clear on who they would even be reliable to – the whole agency is addicted to secrecy, its internal factions feuding and sabotaging each other in the shadows, the chain of command a complete mystery to anyone not sitting at the top of it. Just like Area X, it’s never even close to clear whether the things encountered are the outwards signs of some grand and intricate conspiracy, or just the random flailing of a blind idiot god.

Vandermeer has at this point made a very specific aesthetic of horror almost his brand, and it shows up here in spades – the uncanny intersection and overlap of nature and civilization, overgrown ruins and artificial facsimiles or animals, the overwhelming of ordered systems and bureaucratic rationality with the bizarre and inexplicable, the usurpation of body, mind and world by something foreign to it. This is a book whose acknowledgements section is at least half different specific sorts of ecologist or similar experts being thanks for things like ‘detailed information on how a gar would feel in the hands like a rifle,’ and ‘how it would feel to have an alligator gush through the mud around you if you were lying mud-bound in a blackened meadow.’ Which I always find just incredibly endearing (along with the acknowledgement for an idea as being from a literary critique essay of the themes in the original trilogy – which is getting a bit incestuous, but it was a good bit of imagery.)

As always, some parts of this is going to work much better than others – the rabbits with the odd cameras around their necks, placidly digging for and eating crab meat while a flamethrower is unloading on them particularly stuck with me, whereas given the sheer wordcount spent on it I don’t think the Tyrant (or any of the alligators tbh) had nearly the effect on me the book hoped they would.

Overall though, it worked. Vandermeer’s prose is laid on more than a little thick at points, but there are several different bits of imagery or turns of phrase that have stuck with me – that feel downright inspirational to try and make something that can achieve the same effect, even. I do feel like the impact of Area X is weakened by the fact the total absence of really normal seeming people – even before the border falls, we only barely meet a single person not already captured in the whole labyrinth of conspiracies, hypnotism and psychosis – but that is in fact kind of a plot point here, so.

As far as recommendations go – this book is totally incomprehensible if you haven’t read the original trilogy. Also not as good as Annihilation. Go read that and then decide if you want to continue – but the series remains one of the leading examples of 21st century cosmic horror that’s trying to be something besides a riff on Lovecraft.

[corsair-news-alliance]

Waitwaitwaitwait. Morse. You. The Morse of CORSAIR. Quite possibly one of the most influential non governmental bodies in the Orion. As a handler, do not have a chassis.

Like, what sort of strict Union Glue huffing tester was in charge of your certification? Like, by the Stars. Unless you nearly killed someone with your testing range, they really shouldn't have flunked you. I get that is Lancers are "elite strike forces" technically, but c'mon. Any poor fucker can wake up with a Litch instead of a toaster once morning because a HORUS cell thought it would be "funny." GMS testers aren't usually that strict unless you actually tested on Cradle.

You should retake. Even if you're not planning on using a chassis. From the sounds of it, you've survived hell twice over. Try it again. If you want to rule out mechanical failure, which is generally the only reason anyone even gets flunked, ask to borrow someone closer to you's neuro helm if they don't use a mech mounted system.

Having an Everest to use in a crisis scenario is a lifesaver. Even if you're not great at it. Even if you're a shit shot. Just punch a fucker. Designate CAS. Hell, the Everest can even work as a command vic!

There's so many uses for a combat chassis outside of frontline combat that it's a crime they failed someone like you.

Signing off, [Redacted]

[Morse lets out an absolutely exhausted sigh]

Ra below the Omninet is as bad as my parents. I'm not that damn influential I'm a handler... I stopped more people from dying in a pointless company civil war. I am not some force of power. I did my job and that's it.

Don't idolize me.... don't turn me into a figure I am not.

I failed the damn shooting range exam nearly twice. These meat and blood hands with a training sidearm...

I am not fit to pilot a mech, I do not want to pilot a mech and I won't pilot a mech.

How hard is it to understand that I am not a pilot and won't be a pilot. My job is behind the desk taking care of pilots. You wanna know who did handling and piloting?

[Her vocal stim of clicking is audible for a few seconds]

Signal. Deuces. Hell Commodore did a few times.

It changes you.

I've seen it.

Power to the pilots, I'm dating one and pining after another, but I am NOT touching a frame with the intent to even turn it on.

Not everyone has to pilot to be useful. Thought the Omninet would know that.

//Morse\\

[clubsmarties]

He was exhausted but he still could tell she was thinking. The funny thing about being separated for a period of time, he could still read her. After adventure week things had been a bit wobbly and he gave her time to sort herself out. She couldn't have been that busy during the entire week and weekend but he didn't push. Until this case. This case seemed to have brought them together for a second time. Bailing her out all that time ago counted as a friend favor. If he didn't need help he probably would have let it go. Have her come back around on her own but he could feel there was an open crack peeking through that enabled him to call on her and know she'd answer.

The comforting feel of her hand on his hand made a dull ache perch on his heart. The weight of it making him breathe a little easier. He didn't look up fearing if he did he'd do something stupid, stupid in her eyes he supposed, like kiss her. Well, this was quite the conundrum to settle into. Still, the warmth of her hand was nice. How he wished they were back at adventure week. Things seemed a lot less complicated. His eyes nearly bugged out of its sockets as she took the bracelet right off his wrist. It took him a moment to realize what she was doing when he locked eyes with her. Big mistake. Staring at her beautiful eyes had him holding back a lean in.

The question made him chuckle, "No," shaking his head at her wrong assumption. "It's a protector bracelet. The goddess of travel." Wally wasn't religious in the least and though he respected it, his true belief lied on his sister's best friend's beliefs. The spiritual nature of believing in other entities. Specifically Greek Goddesses. "If you need help. Take my phone. My actual phone." The one he hid from Karina every single time. He didn't want her knowing any of his personal details. What she knew was very little, crumbs. She didn't even know he lived in Hawaii and had tiny tots in his family. "Take it. In case you run into trouble. It has kind of a lo jack. I can find you if you need help."

"Yeah, I know. You're kind of a magnet for it." A little smile spread across his features. In a way to say he trusted whatever she was about to do. "Doing everything for the kid. That's more than what people would normally do."

There was nothing more to protest. He had given her everything, every piece of information, every detail and the bracelet. Nothing more for him to do other than wait for her to come back. Maybe this was what his sisters felt like every time he left for a mission. Mustering a smile best he could he let out a soft breath. "Be safe. I'll take a shower and rest," he said that cheekily knowing how she wanted him to do so.

That. That right there was why she knew that she had to let him go after this. In the short time that she had spent on the island trying to figure out what her next move in life would be, she had become too close to him. So close that he could tell things from a look. It unsettled her. It made her feel too seen. She couldn't be seen. Her survival depended on her never being seen. A part of her felt good to be seen by a man, a good man, like Wally, another part was scared. Scared because she slowly had been realizing how attached she had been becoming of him as well.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, she put her hand over his to stop him from ripping off any more skin from his nails. The last she had seen him do that was when he was stressed out about the robbery case that left a security guard fighting for his life and dead ends everywhere. He had exhausted all avenues for a week before coming to her. So she knew hat whatever he was trying to say was hard, so she left her hand on his, comforting him through it. Wanting to know what he had to say. Eyebrows knitted in a slight confusion, her well-being was a priority to him over the kid? Making sure she came out of this okay was the last thing on her mind the moment he told her that the kid was the real reason he had taken this mission. A part of her wanted to truly help, to make a difference of some sort in the world. To help a soul escape the fate that she had been given at such a young age.

It was no secret to her now that he had liked her. Maybe even more than liked her, she had picked up on the subtle things here and there, especially over what he had dubbed adventure week. It was why she had maintained her distance from him. He was not a mark for her to toy with, she was going to be leaving sooner or later and she didn't want to lead him on. She was not someone who stayed. Hell depending on the week, she wasn't even her. He was infatuated with an idea of her, she convinced herself and the sooner this was over and she left the better.

For now, she needed to focus on the task at hand. A plant. Okay, she could work with that.

Before she left, she didn't want to leave things like this. She didn't want him to feel like he's feelings were invalidated, like this honesty wasn't something she was thankful for. Patting his hand, she took her hand back into hers. "I get it. I do. Thank you for worrying about me, I can't say that nothing will happen to me because I have a tendency of running head first in totouble. I will say that I will be more careful." Standing up, she nodded. "I want to help you get this kid one way or another." She would keep her old moniker a secret for now. It would have to be a secret, until the moment it no longer could be. Her becoming a thief again wouldn't be the worst thing she'd ever done. "I care about yours as well. After what you went through yesterday you need to rest. You let me do what I do, and I will be back in a couple of hours with a bit more information, okay."

Bending over, she took his hand into hers and slipped the bracelet off his wrist. "I'll wear the bracelet if that makes you feel better. I assume it has a tracker or something of the sort, right? That's why you were so adamant about it yesterday. I won't wear an earpiece but I'll wear a mic if you want to listen in. If there is something that I can promise you is that I will be careful and that I will help you find this kid." She already had her plan in mind, it was easy as it had always been, flirt, get him to loosen up at a bar. Drinks and a pretty girl saying the right things always made for loose lips. She had done worse things out of selfishness, it was time to be selfless for once.

[codecicle]

[system creepypasta voice] we're going to plural the kit you

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Knowledge Revenge.