#this man is a loser dork and i love him more than anything

[captain-flint]

He's so confident, you know? He's interesting. He has a cleft.

[a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual]

More headcanons of the Nimona trio being domestic dorks

Whenever the trio gets sick of each other they’ll ask the person in the trio they’re not pissed at to handle them

It always goes something like this “Ambrosius come get your kid they won’t leave me alone-“ “No Nemesis come get your husband he’s being a stick in the mud”

Or “Bal go get your son from prison he got arrested again” “Oh so he’s my son today?” “Yes when he’s stupid enough to get caught he’s your son” 

If you're wondering why Nimona doesn't just escape its cause they find it hilarious when Bal has to come to bail them out at random points in the day

There are also times when they’re proud or happy and they’ll say things like “I’m gonna go get my daughter ice cream” “Since when is she just your daughter?” “Since right now when she helped me fix my prosthetic” 

“Hey boss where’s my Nemesis I heard he got in a fight today” “I thought he was my Nemesis” “Not when he puts three guys in the hospital he’s not” 

Bal is one of those people who sees something and says “Why would I buy that when I can just make it” AND HE DOES

Nimona has a bad habit of fucking up speakers so Bal just set up a sound system throughout the house 

If the trio weren’t such antisocial losers with three friends combined their parties would be amazing

He made Ambrosius a skincare cabinet just so he could put actual medicine in the medicine cabinet 

When Nimona moved in he asked them what their ideal room would look like 

She gave him a rough draft and he did all of it

They spend a week tearing that room apart so they could soundproof it so she could rock out without disturbing the boys

She has sick ass LED lights and she’ll change the colors depending on her mood 

Ambrosius and Bal helped her paint the walls the most obnoxious shade of neon pink And then they didn’t complain when she spray painted over said walls 

It’s worth it to see her visibly relax when she enters her room

This man has gutted and put back together and rearranged their little house so many times it’s unrecognizable 

I also feel like everyone in the trio is a crafty bitch

They all have a million little hobbies that have produced even more trinkets that fill up their whole house 

Their house is this weird combination of comfy yet chaotic and it's a minimalists nightmare 

Cleaning is also a nightmare but they wouldn't change it for anything 

Back when they were in the institute Ambrosius was a terrible cook -♾️/10 his cooking would put people in the hospital 

After the knighting ceremony was the first time he was living by himself and didn’t have access to free food so he taught himself how to cook

Honestly most people would think he would give up

I mean there are only so many times you set water on fire before you throw in the towel

But he's a stubborn brat and cooking took his mind off of everything so he stuck with it

One day Bal came home to the smell of cooking and he assumed it was Nimona 

He swears to this day he had a heart attack when he saw Ambrosius in front of the stove and Nimona comfortably sitting at the dinner table not helping at all

He promptly dragged Nimona out of there like a bomb just went off and warned him not to touch Ambrosius’ food

He told Bal “The more you call it a biohazard the more I want to eat it” 

So Bal used him like a test dummy 

When Nimona finally did try it they turned to Bal and complained that he lied 

Bal thought he was being pranked until he was forced by Nimona to try the food 

And it was good 

More than good I was fucking amazing 

He asked Ambrosius quite frankly “Who are you and what have you done with my husband” 

Ambrosius just rolled his eyes and told him to eat the food

Bal never gave up on finding out how and slowly but surely he started asking like a normal person

And Ambrosius never answered like a normal person

His answers would range from “A chef never reveals his secrets” (“that’s a magician love” “just zip it and eat your food”) to “I’m never telling you so suffer and finish this meal I lovingly cooked” (“is it still considered love if you knew I was gonna suffer?” “Yes” “…. Makes sense”)

[majimasleftasscheek]

Hi, im very sorry if this has already been answered or established somewhere else but im curious, with your Kazumaji stuff, around what time did they start dating (i.e. after the events of Yakuza 0 and all that) and how?

tbh, I dunno!

I don't really have an established date for that cuz sometimes I'm like man they'd be really cute during y0 and then other times I set it between post y0 and the beginning of y1. The latest they would start me thinks is some months after the events of y1 but in general it sorta depends on how I'm feeling and what silly scenarios play in my head

ideas under the cut tho 👀

if we're talking y0: I like to think Kiryu has to go to Sotenbori for some reason, be it business or he's there with Nishiki for some partying. he sees Majima at the Grand being depressed and is like "damn girl those bags under your eyes makes my dick go *boing sound effect*" and asks him out 🥺 Kiryu gets rejected immediately cuz Majima's in this cycle of 'I deserve nothing but pain and suffering' but Kiryu can't read the room so he is persistently showing up at the Grand despite Majima very obviously wanting to kick his ass. eventually he relents and goes on cute™ dates with Kiryu and realizes oof maybe human intimacy be kinda gucci

if between y0 and y1: Majima's fresh in his mad dog era starting shit with people just to be annoying and Kiryu's one of his targets mainly due to the events of y0. he's kinda like "lol this goober really did some important plot stuff, huh?" and his curiosity gets the better of him because Kiryu is an enigma who eats bugs and Majima cannot suppress his need to get some sense of understanding on this weirdo. in this timeline, it's more one-sided affection from Majima that comes in the form of stabbing while Kiryu is desperately trying to fight the gay allegations and failing. eventually he caves but it's a sorta unofficial, on and off thing that Kiryu doesn't really know how to evaluate for himself. Majima doesn't really care what they are since he's high on life atm and has a cute dude with big boobs on his arm

if during y1: literally just everything Majima Everywhere. Goromi. GOROMI 😩💦 Kiryu is all: I LIKE PUSSY but everyone's like okay big man then why's Majima pole dancing for you huh. the two braincells he has start to click and he realizes maybe Majima wants to hold hands or something unthinkable like that. ngl I like to think Kiryu's thing for Yumi is like a demisexual bi thing where he's like, I do love her but she don't zap my brain quite like the bowlcut freak who knows how to punch me real good and it becomes sorta his personal introspective journey during this time. Majima is also floating in the space of am I doing this for his benefit cuz "training" or am I falling for this dork. he's pretty sad about it cuz of the Saejima reminder vibes but eventually Kiryu falls into his own person that Majima really meshes with and the two of them struggle to actually voice how they feel all the while their pants are down in some dirty alley

if after y1: (going to insert shit from a fic I'm working on) Kiryu's absolutely devastated with what happened in the Millennium Tower + now having to take care of Haruka that he's shut himself off from everyone and everything other than doing the bare minimum to live. in comes Majima being a menace like yo you can't like, let a child parent herself you gotta get outta this slump and Kiryu's all fuck you stop breaking into my house. so it's a long pain in the ass process to help Kiryu deal with his grief while Majima keeps unintentionally making googoo eyes at him and both of them are like boy I sure hope this doesn't awaken anything within me. there's also a lotta dadjima stuff going on and Kiryu's like wowie zowie so you do have a heart and Majima's like no way loser while being just 😳👉👈

[verdemoun]

can i have more timewarp Javier info? just because im insane about him

Timewarp Javier deserves the world I will never forgive dutch van der linde.

Javier was the only timewarper who immediately burst into tears and started hugging everyone upon seeing the gang. Admittedly, if not for the fact they’d just watched him magically appear in the middle of a market, they might have doubted it was Javier because of how out of character it was and also pictures didn’t do justice to how much Javier had changed.

Not in a fatphobic way but in a what happened to the light in his eyes. How is his hair shorter than they’d ever seen it and yet so dry and ratty with split ends when it had once been something he took pride in. Why has every single year been carved into his face. Compared to Bill, John and even Dutch, Javier just seems old and tired to the 1899 gang.

Being around the gang in a weird way bought back the post-1899 depression and self-doubt back. Javier really took Dutch's 'change' the hardest. He stayed loyal to Dutch only for Dutch to still leave him behind escaping Beaver Hollow. He had been living for survival since then, not for anything he believed in. Had he ever believed in anything? Or had he echoed Dutch's ideals from the moment they met?

Once again, Papa Hosea to the rescue. He knows what it's like to feel like a fool for believing in Dutch - and even if he knew everything he does now, he thinks he would have kept following Dutch with the same blind devotion. Javier was no more a fool than any of them. Every day he wakes up beside his wife he's reminded what a fool he is: he went back to Dutch when Bessie was still alive. He gave up years he could have spent waking up beside her in favor of following Dutch.

Javier also struggled a lot with the sheer concept of timewarp because he's catholic. All the catholic boys (Kieran, Sean and Javier) went through the necessary crisis of 'does this mean God isn't real' because modern era isn't torture enough to be hell but if the closest thing to heaven is a 16" new york pizza then they want their money back.

One of his first regular outings leaving the house was he started going to church again. Kieran and Javier, two gays in the back row having a crisis of faith not for being gay but 'how the fuck did I end up alive 100 years into the future instead of Hell'.

Javier loves instagram. It's like giving a bird a mirror. He will doom-scroll for hours just looking at pretty things and understands the modern era concept of aesthetic long before even the 1899 gang have figured it out. Bessie loves that they've picked up an interior decorator. She has come home to Javier moving furniture around and it just works so much better.

Javier sees Kieran in a skirt once, gets the run down on how the concept of gender and sexuality, and immediately is running to the store because he NEEDS IT. He loves make-up (admittedly just because he is a bit vain and loves hiding his blemishes to Kieran's disgust) and is the crowned prince of hair products. Everyone's getting $80 bottles of shampoo and conditioner for their specific hair type for Christmas.

Because Javier was so depressed after he timewarped Hosea held off bullying him to get a job because he needed time to work through his grief and feelings towards the gang and get back to something he could consider himself again. Most of the gang actually enjoy having jobs and a reason to get out of bed and function but by the time Javier seemed in a good enough place to consider it, Javier was fully committed to the unemployed loser lifestyle and loved it. Bessie is fine with this but swears no more of them living off her paycheck she can only support so many and still have grandbaby spoiling money.

Javier in fact invented the 'can I rizz you up' 'sure' 'PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE' because man knows how to carry himself confidently and act suave but is actually a dork and a loser. This level of manfailure even effects his ability to flirt with Kieran Duffy, an oversized sweater wearing horsegirl who still has hay stuck in his hair. (Kieran in contrast is a clumsy disaster who is fully capable of having someone wrapped around his fingers with an artful pick up line).

Teaching Javier to drive was basically a crash course in Spanish. He doesn't hate driving but he has the worst road rage and will always say insults in Spanish instead. This has backfired many times with how much more common Americans speaking Spanish is in modern era.

Fishing is much more obviously a core part of Javier's personality. He has all the shit fishing caps. Javier and Kieran have fucked in the Bass Pro Shops pyramid. He does have a guitar but sometimes at gang catch ups he will be too busy talking about fishing to remember to play it.

The gang still love listening to Javier play. Javier hadn't played guitar since 1899 and playing again takes them all back to the good days before Blackwater.

Javier, alongside John, are the only ones who won't forgive Dutch. Javier lost too much of himself in his loyalty to Dutch and he won't forgive him for never coming back for him after Beaver Hollow. He won't risk losing the slither of happiness he's found to Dutch's whims again.

[eclipsewxtch]

okay so i have so much stuff planned for blue moon so MINOR SPOILERS AHEAD FOR RELATIONSHIP DYNAMICS IF YOU DONT WANT SPOILERS FOR ANY FUTURE CHAPTERS LOOK AWAY AVERT UR EYES:

ik i said this before but all relationships r implied n i don’t make anything canon. that being said, i make sure all ships (even the most obscure n rare ones) get their flowers!! whether that’s from POV’s in the chapter, dialogue, or just little moments/details. that being said, here’s what i intended:

• ethan & jesse have the relationship dynamic of two toxic divorced men who have shared custody of their daughter (jane)

• jane is jesse’s kid idc idc idc im making it happen its gonna give reluctant dad/mentor who’s lowkey the Worst Person Ever & daughter/mentee he didn’t want but NEEDED!!! they’re gonna be so good. im gonna eat it up.

• jane is ethan’s kid too ig but it’s not the same. like that’s her protector n her brother sure but JESSE?? he commits war crimes for that little girl she’s his baby

• audrey & ethan have the relationship dynamic of something soft and sweet. like she makes him feel grounded, but not exactly human. safe. i adore them. i rlly wanted it to give monster bf x human gf so i hope it has those vibes(?)

• rory & ethan (im so so biased i love them so much) they have the dynamic of puppy love. they’re just the sweetest n kindest n they make my heart hurt so much. literally aches.

• benny & ethan r very much old married couple. (they’re gonna hurt yall so bad in the last chapter for s1 like yall r gonna hate me!) they fight n bicker, but it’s like a domestic kind (until it’s not) n crazily enough i actually don’t ship them (don’t crucify me yall) but i want to feed the bethan shippers.

• sarah & ethan give nerd x cool girl he’d do anything for. like he is the loser bf to her cool popular gf!! i actually rlly love this ship n its kinda sickening, but i think ethan heals sarah from her past hurts (jesse u asshole) n sarah makes ethan feel seen n less of a dork.

• erica & ethan r just cuties!! friends forever!! like it’s black cat x golden retriever with them. while i don’t ship, i understand it’s a REALLY rare pair, so they have cute moments where they have fun together. its more platonic, i’ll admit, but if u wanna read into it u can.

• benny & erica r unrequited crushes. like i fear they had a crush on each other b4 she became a vampire, n after the bite it just could never go anywhere. she became too different, n he stayed the same. he’s bitter abt the missed chance; n she can’t imagine him ever liking her before she was a vampire.

• erica & rory have the same dynamic in the show but she’s just nicer to him about it. that’s her puppy, n she treats him as such but she’ll be DAMNED if YOU treat him like a dog. who do u think u r???

• erica & sarah are sapphic vampire gfs. soulmates, ur honor. it’s bad. real bad. i fear they are each other’s homes.

• jesse & rory give evil villain n his loyal henchman. it’s cute in a “oh he listens n respects ur opinions” kind of way, but he takes those opinions to further his selfish agenda.

•NO RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN JESSE/SARAH OR JESSE/ERICA, THAT SHIT IS PAST TENSE AND FINISHED!! REFUSE TO HAVE A MAN COME BETWEEN WOMEN!

•audrey & sarah r gonna be best friends. they don’t argue over a man; they’re better than that. unfortunately audrey is straight n this won’t be romantic😓

• s2 is gonna be longer than s1–so like twenty chapters probably(?) #longfic #somuchthoughtputinthis and i am probably gonna go back n edit s1 chapters in between updates for s2 but i rlly rlly wanna dive deep in each character. ESPECIALLY JESSE. this redemption arc is gonna go crazy. he’s a horrible, terrible, very bad man and yet!!

• i love audrey n im forcing everyone to love her as well. i normally hate OC’s in fics bc it’s like damn why is this person taking over the narrative(?) n more often than not it feels like an extension of the author’s personality. unfortunately if i was gonna make audrey an extension of me and a self-insert for me i would have her flirt HEAVY w erica. love erica bad😝 if anything audrey is just for fun. i was like hm? what if we gave ethan a little red riding hood?? wouldn’t that be sooo funny? n it is.

• i’m sorry for bringing this up again but the ethan & jane & jesse dynamic goes sooo crazy. so crazy. be thankful im not turning it into a louis & claudia & lestat situation bc i contemplated more than once having jane almost die n ethan beg jesse to turn her. i decided against it but the urge was there.

[stardewsnail]

Harvey asking Shane if it’s his first time ( idk if your doing shipping between the characters but I love these two dorks together 😭 )

Okay this is one of those ships that I didn't get until I was writing these goofs and now I'm sold. Idk if this is spicy or just kind of soft and goofy lol

✰ Stardew After Dark ✰

⋆ Snail's Directory ⋆

-> MINORS DNI

“Is this your first time?” 

The words tumbled out before Harvey could stop them, anxiety possessing his tongue. Shane's lips stilled on his throat. The shorter man sat up, eyes questioning and Harvey could only squirm. He wished he could take the question back–the shorter man still straddled him and he wanted nothing more than to lose himself in the contact.

“Jeez, Harv, I’m not that much of a loser,” he had an easy smile, “You mean with a guy?” 

“Sorry–” Harvey said quickly, “I didn’t mean to imply anything–” 

“Breathe,” Shane’s smile was uncharacteristically soft, “It’s not my first time with a guy, no. Is it yours?” Harvey nodded, certain he was redder than the hot peppers Shane liked so much. 

“That’s fine,” he shrugged, his large, strong hands taking Harvey’s face, “We’ll go at your pace.” 

“I mean I know the mechanics–” oh lord why was he still talking, “I am a doctor–”

“Okay, promise me you’re not gonna check my prostate or something,” Shane laughed, a teasing edge to his words. Harvey couldn’t help but roll his eyes, a good-natured smile curving his lips. 

“If you insist.”

[nicepersondisorder]

What is your favourote and least favourite character from hazbin? Would you change anything about them?

THANK YOU FOR QUESTION !!

i have MANY favorite characters from hazbin !! depending on the traits and the lense we're sorting them by

they're all so interesting and cool!! charchar is amazing and i love how she refuses to give up and sees good in everyone (AND HER VOICE ACTOR IS SO GOOD. SHE HAS SUCH PRETTY VOICE.). she's determined and goal oriented and her dreams are so good and while she has issues and problems, she's genuinely such a good person. i also like the fact that she's a sweet bubbly character, but she still doesn't shy away from swearing and she was shown to lose her cool several times. i love her. i really should reblog more arts with her. okkkk once i finish writing this answer i will go and queue more arts with my babygirl !!!! o7

have i told i love charlie? yeah? i love her. i love her a lot. sorry. next segment

in the next segment we have "pathetic losers", which has two sub-types: "dorks" and "just genuinely pathetic. like. good lord they're so fucking pathetic. (/neg)."

at the top is lucifer ! he's a fascinating critter. he goes in the "dorks" category, but he is really pathetic. dipping toes in the second category even! loser <3 (speaking of losers, i LOVE husk's design. no i'm not biased because he's a cat what are you talking about !!)(i'm lying)(don't have a special opinion on his overall character though, sowwy </3). ANYWAY continuing with lucifer! majority of the scenes with him were Physically Painful to watch due to Second Hand Embarrassment (also i did skip almost all of the episode due to Reasons tm. i need to go and actually watch it. sloooowly). his "TAKE THAT DEPRESSION" lives rent fee in my brain and reminds me of a "could a depressed person make this?" meme. he's pathetic wet beast of a man and while i dislike his absence and flippancy towards his daughter, i understand him (LOL). im also extremely depressed 🤝. that doesn't excuse his actions but i do get why he acts the way he acts. also i don't have "more than anything" playing on repeat. don't look at my music app

second in the "dorks" category is sir pentious! not gushing about him as much as about charchar or lucifer, but he is just so. he evokes cuteness agression in me. i need to make a balloon animal out of him. he is such a nerd. i loved him when the pilot came out (the only character from pilot i drew in 2019 actually!)(you should be honored sirsnake!!). he's not on the list of my favorite favorite characters, i just thought i'd include him since i brought up the "dorks" subtype.

breaking the segment to talk how i find charlie endearing. she's such a sweetheart..... she can do it i believe in her and her dreams <33 (sir pent DID get redeemed after all!!!! the hotel is working !!). she's so silly. love her. ok moving to subtype "pathetic /neg"

the one and only character in this category is vox. he's so fucking pathetic. tearing my hair out i LOVE him for this. okay so i might be a liiiiitle bit unfair to him BUT . his crush on alastor is just so. shaking crying i don't have words for this. he has such bad taste in men (affectionate). AND THE WAY HE ACTS ABOUT IT IS ALSO SO PATHETIC. "oh i learned that the guy who i have love(unrequited)/hate relationship with is back from 7 years absence??? i must broadcast how i don't care about him at all IMMEDIATELY". has the vibe from the joke i've heard somewhere "i've been chasing you for seven miles to tell you how much i don't care about you" or something like that, don't remember the exact wordinb unfortunately 😔. he IS a cool character tho. i love his design, im really weak for tv headed characters. i could run doom on him.sorry. also his powers are sick as fuck!!! but he's so pathetic it's easy to froget how much influence he has an how strong he is.i want to pick him apart on the vivisection table. sorry again. no im not

okay ! next category! "fucking dick holy shit". valentino. he's So Terrible. i need him boiled in oil and i also hate him and i like him and i hope he dies ten thousand deaths and i want to see him suffer. kind of niffty-like type of like for him! he's really fascinating in the worst way possible and he's like. hmmmm im not sure how to put it? he's a genuinely good character (NOT person, two different things) and he can be both absolutely terrible vile etc etc, there are scenes shown that humanize him, which i think is also a good thing, because irl abusers are not one dimensional, and so fictinal ones also shouldn't be, especially in a show that wants to bring up serious themes correctly. controversial opinion but people bitching about how val's design is wasted on him are completely missing the point. yeah.

um! moving on !

there are more characters that i Like, but if i'd be listing them all im afraid itd take years 😭 like you asked for one (1) favorite character and i wrote you a whole essay LMAO

and i don't think i have a least favorite character? it takes too much energy to dislike a character that i don't have XD (i do have a slight distate for alastor, but it's for personal 🍎 reasons so i'm not gonna include him in the post! or in the tags)

nvm i lied i don't like zestial. i Can Not understand what he's saying 💔 bless the subtitles ! that's a silly "least favorite character" don't take it seriously !

ALMOST FORGOT TO ANSWER THE SECOND QUESTION. i don't think i'd change anything about the characters !! except maybe making zestial's speech more understandable. please bitches with auditory processing issues can't understand what you're saying zestial please im begginb you on my knees WHAT ARE YOU SAYING

[butmakeitgayblog]

I can’t believe I’m saying this but I do kind of understand what Harry Styles was saying about gay sex scenes because sex scenes with men are always so ROUGH 😭 With het and MLM scenes I typically have trouble believing that they actually have any feelings for each other beyond Horny because the whole time I’m just like damn dude are you even trying to make it good for them cause it’s not all about you!!!

And then like you said we get a hard cut to two girls doing nothing more than laying in bed holding the covers over their titties and I feel infinitely more chemistry and love between them than basically any sex scene with a man 😂 Have men in the industry not got the memo that sex doesn’t always have to be getting railed until you can’t walk but rather there are many ways to have sex and it can in fact often be a loving and dare I say cute experience??? If there’s gonna be a sex scene I want it to show something about the characters and their relationship, how they treat and care for each other (or not 😬) not… whatever tf the scene in TLFOAH was. Wasn’t sexy, didn’t contribute anything, super out of place… ugh

Well, respectfully idk about all that. I mean I think there have been sex scenes involving men that are perfectly lovely and loving in their depiction, it's just unfortunate that those don't tend to be the stories Hollywood dork ass loser execs want to portray 😒 they all want rough sex and violence and exploitation

And really I don't even necessarily blame the actors. I mean yes it's their performance, but I assume they're mostly being directed on how to shoot these scenes. I believe most, if not all, sex scenes these days have choreographers that break every movement and touch down beat by beat to try and do away with any variables that could mess up a shot or give opportunities to less savory actors trying to pull shit in scenes that make stuff weird.

And that's where my bitching and complaining comes in! Lol because now they have no excuse. There's no excuse for the bullshit that gets peddled and is so obviously made salacious on purpose rather than loving.

Like this scene for example.

It could have actually been worth a damn. A sex scene could have worked here, if they had not been thinking "hmmm ho how can we make this as sexy as possible so whoever's boyfriend that's being made to watch this with will get their dick hard", and actually used it as a vehicle for the plot and for character development. I would've been completely for it. If they had slowed down and taken a few beats to show him being sweet with her, show him lovingly kissing her, maybe a few smiles or intense looks while they slowly undressed each other, moments where he stops just to look into her eyes and build that connection. Have the rhythm of the sex be slow and sweet, as though he's giving her tenderness and caring that she hadn't had before - that she's so obviously been searching for in all her pain and trauma and abandonment. That would've been amazing! BECAUSE THEN! You jump forward to the beach scene only a few moments later, and you see that veneer crack. You see the beginnings of his ugliness and his abuse start to emerge.

How much more impactful would that have been?

That stark contrast. That immediate shift that would've felt like the rug was yanked right out from under the viewer and Alice both.

To move between these scenes of seeing her falling into him, thinking '*sigh* Finally. Finally, here's someone who cares about me. Here's someone who will be soft with me. Here's someone who will protect me, help me heal, give me the love that's been stolen from me over and over again in my life. Here's my safety.'

And then... you see him change.

That would've totally been so effective and speak to the characters and the blossoming of their relationship, and how someone can be so blinded by emotions that they don't see the danger signs right in front of them. It would've built such a more solid foundation for why Alice would make excuses and exceptions for him and his behavior, because we'd know that she'd already have this love story written in her head fROM THE SEX SCENE

But no.

Nope.

Uh uh.

Gratuitous boinking always wins and I just

[the-firebird69]

Watch "Miley Cyrus - Wrecking Ball (Official Video)" on YouTube

I think she's saying that I wrecked her somehow is that true it was Tommy favino and she screwed up a little bit and seem to seems like she's seen to me or something

Zues

It's very strange I want to do the job and get out there and make it work and it didn't it's going to try again we'll see fails and he comes back like he's just getting rid of our kids you could do the first round it doesn't give a s*** and is smiling and says I'm back and what is that annoying you fail all the time and not with them all of them all at once and he knows it too this is your coward that's true you can sacrificing them for your life and you're not really applying yourself make sure that people see that I mean for Christ's sake what a mess and she taught them to do stupid s*** you're dorking with each other more than anything. I can't stand it it's repulsively stupid what happens it happens every time and you're told not to do that dumb s*** like the max who Don't Care about Us they want to program and there you are. He says he do it to him too all the time you're aggressive you won't back off you're telling me to say stupid s*** crazy that I was in the middle of this dumb battle and War and these people are idiots about it this is terrible. I guess we're texting them as well it sounds like or he doesn't want us to do that and a lot more opposed to it. I don't want to go on if this is how it's going to go everyday watching just all of my children die. And what he says is you're right to defend yourself but Stalin started this off, it was very wrong and doing so and very selfish and what he's doing is extremely weird and I see that too he's a huge pig.

I want him gone I want him dead I want him buried. And another thing I'm not everyone s***. Well it happened a bit and not with our friend here. Hit a colonoscopy done in the low desert and it was by Tommy f there's a few reasons he did it when is he is a big homo and that's Tommy f is a homo the other is he wants to see if there's anything in there those people kept saying they put stuff in them and he wants to check out the house usually means they want to do stuff to him so he did that there and then he did it again and it was him in Tampa and he looks like the shooter in Lincoln shooting and many shootings it's the same look and that's what he's saying. I have a problem with that because it's supposed to remember stuff to know how to do stuff and then there's this idiot trying to harm him and he's good for his people this is all starting not to make fun of sense so I looked at it and I figured some stuff out he's not very nice to him and it's mean it's trying to team up secretly and our friends saying that she goes screw like I can't tell what you're doing so gay f****** plan and keep saying some military one over and over and it looks a little bit deeper and they're fighting each other very hard and this guy has some secret stuff he's getting his ass kicked and that's Tommy f here and there and he won't say it because he's been screwed around us so much that he's getting beating up a little bit and I said this you're sitting there forcing him to hit you anybody in their brother would have to you're trying to make him sick all the time and you like a b**** I've never seen a man do that so many times in my life and I want you did and he wants you did you hurt his parents and they're my friends you turn them on to all sorts of stuff and you're a loser I'm probably attacking the wrong place but you need to see what happens when you do this kind of s*** to your own we can't concentrate on anything you can't get anything done and you're loving it and you're still doing it you lost all your bases you lost your fleas pretty pretty soon the stupid little blockade will be gone it's not that big that comparison to what everybody has ammo ordinance and then your army is toast and it's huge but really everybody hates you. What I want to say is why did you do all the stupid s*** this is such hell you took his job and you start doing it yourself even terrorizing us for thousands of years

Miley Cyrus

Seriously I get this question a lot and I do it because I have to it's very utilitarian. But for sure you understand you're always infighting you always saying stuff especially your race and you lose as hell about everything information and I thought you're up to you tell them all the time out loud I need some time in a western girl cuz he's a competitor who has he got 50 ships he'll lose because some a****** has 50 ships and her friend he understands why and he understands you need like really stiff drinks in order to behave a certain way

Tommy f

That's what you say recently been a long time ago you didn't necessarily have to do this

Miley Cyrus

Long time ago I was assigned to the underworld and I took it and I did the best I could I found secrets and I didn't feel I should tell anybody because they were helping me with the burden it was getting worse and harder and it kept getting worse and harder and yeah I was making it that way and I still am but it's a method so I may have gone nuts

Tommy f

You mean you lost your family and had nothing else to live for so you kept cutting this guy's family loose to help him see what happened to you he's got nobody his gal is somewhere else

Miley Cyrus

I did it because I had to and I lost my family yes and to my own clothes that's because of you people you kept tormenting me and tormenting me and bothering me and harassing me so I made too many and he overcame the hierarchy and she usually do and that was the sacrifice I had to make to stop you from harassing me to death like you're doing to him you are a repulsive race and you should know it you speak out of turn you harass people all the time you and your people are in this way and you're not Stan's kids those kids are gone cuz you people you're gross you grab things you have things you don't use you hoard them and you never use them and you never better your lives and you live like cave people if left alone no my life back I have to get rid of you to do it and you're going down not me

Tommy f

Is it so bad that we can't be tolerated

Miley Cyrus

What it is stupid what you say is stupid your way is dumb no we don't need Sarah to come up with a book to describe Chris's relatives and we don't need ancient history to volunteering a few seconds so you can try and get some squeeze or some other stuff it's not worth it and your brains don't calculate that the equation is not there and it's costly and it didn't do what Michael wanted and it's destroying him and me and the realm is getting ruined not just us you should know you're responsible for a big chunk of that and for ruining everybody's lives for a long time and sure you're not able to figure out how to do it correctly that's why we don't like you because you can't argue that you're doing it on purpose that much and he says that's not true they have a revolution in it's based on eating everybody who's the enemy so I figured out if you figure that out what are you saying is there's some aspects to your personality and that would be one that people can't tolerate do you understand that

Tommy f

I sort of get something you figured out what I'm up to and he figured out the plan and he understood it because we keep blabbing at him and it was still a threat and I'm still blab at him, who's the brad says he's out there blaming our friend himself, and he blames him for putting him in prison in Oklahoma is this s*** head Trump and he keeps doing it even afterwards saying it's his people this is why would I do that for I had to inspire you dumb c********* that's a problem because we're not smart enough to figure it out but then again so just keeps doing it and doing it and doing it and does nothing and I guess you're right we're stupid and you figured it out and you shouldn't and we just kind of handed to them the information and with dooms because of it so our existence is terrible and what we do with people is terrible and failures but you're doing the similar thing

Miley Cyrus

We do it because you people keep failing and the other week link.

Tommy f

We don't have anything more to say then or failures we suck the exposed stuff but he can't defend ourselves try to ride and fail oh you certainly stuck to your guns there he says I say this you don't have proof of what it works and we work part of the team and you were attacking us for thousands of years so it didn't work he says it's just like other formula but he hasn't figured this one out that other people are cloning and fighting each other and since people would be in the middle and you did it on purpose

Miley Cyrus

In the beginning you're too dumb to keep around no I had to become dumb so I could use you to steal stuff and it's out already and it's still not working it's a huge pain in the ass

Tommy f

So you made us to bedisposable , will you influenced it to happen and I want revenge and you're the problem you're the one who did it and you convinced Mac to and he was not in a position to and the nephilim prove it. It seemed like it was holding me somewhere once and I just walked right out and I'll tell you what this man has some serious strength even when he's really drunk it's all on me asking me a question what are you doing this for and you tell me this and tell me that he's still talking to me it opens his eyes he's holding my snow vest I started laughing cuz I dropped them off after his ass surgery and you remind me of it is holding the thing it's a weird night he found this time of guys cooking around taking he's a lunatic in a space shot and he made a stupid and he made this cold war and we're complete disaster and he's getting bigger outfit and you're the one doing it Tommy f and these Giants too and you don't you're like unaware of it and really if they eat you they look like you and we're in a lot of trouble because of it and you're not defending yourself just like you said we don't he said I don't really want to prove that he's not that's a nice he said this that's nice there's going to be terrible so you say it's him and we get that and no we figured it out you're the problem and you beat up your father for a long time it's way too long and he says his father has a massive ego about it and can't admit it just like you see if you look at Jack Nicholson and if Jack Nicholson cross the road outside the crosswalk he's never going to tell you even if you did it right in front of him of you no I'm sorry your mistaken he'd say that's just the way it is what he's really saying is I know you're not stupid it's not me do it but you're going to look the other way because that's who I am I'm someone who can do it everybody is copying antics and it's horrible and it's not his fault it's just people decide to be stupid and we found out about this and people are still doing it and cuz he doesn't take any offerings it really is kind of fool by a lot of stuff which is true it sucks cuz it really blows I'll probably do this stupid thing it says after the second round stick you in a wrecking ball and I won't make it because it's a radiator for some reason this is why it's a radiated it doesn't weigh that much I know it doesn't it's like 800 lb I can move it around. So it's hollow so someone opened it and I do see that too there's a hole in it a hole and I don't know why it would be a radiated without doing the acts to have them do their video and when demolishing a church, so Tommy F me a radiated and then the church is symbolic so the ball moves around and something breaks inside that suddenly see something this is going to suck and then my husband goes flying into a wall and I Fall in on the same crane that they're trying to threaten our friend was and don't see idiots and we saw you out there doing stuff and then you like this little a****** kid constantly doing s*** well it's ridiculous now you've done things to my family too including Carmen who was my mom she's my mother I learned a lot from her these people are Sharp and you sound stupid most of them are gone I can't run out and I'm back and didn't have anybody I mean it's ridiculous would be surprised if he was with him.

It's very confident and conpitent person Tommy f . Can't see exactly what you're doing or why it's so arrogant with him when I do see that you have some problems with what you're doing and he says it might be something different and it's working on his shadow Dom and he doesn't know if we disabled devices or not some are tougher than others and a lot of them are tougher than what Trump and you guys come up and he says to me so I get what he's saying here's a lot of professional devices. So that could be it and there could be secrets and I'll probably die knowing this is true and he could be horrendously huge. Okay so tell me after your sitting there torturing someone you could wipe everyone out it has to do in a certain way does that make sense

Miley Cyrus

And what was that drive me to do okay so what if there's a secret. I now get what's going on. Ok. I see

Tommy f

There's a secret if for some reason you might know it and a bunch of people went and looked at it no I went out of this I don't want to go after the wall

Miley Cyrus

[babyjakes]

little loser.

〈 disclaimer: this blog posts content not suitable for individuals under the age of 18. minors are strictly prohibited from viewing, sharing, or interacting with this blog. for more information on this blog's commitment to protecting minors, read our full statement here. 〉

summary | jake is the one person in the world you could never say no to.

pairing | boyfriend!jake jensen x reader

warnings | this is just 100% soft fluffy goodness, my first time writing for jake so obviously it needed to be only pure adorable golden retriever!boyfriend vibes, you & jake live in a nice little cottage by a ducky pond bc ofc you do, jake is an animal lover and that is probably canon, this is a fic for cat lovers so chris gtfo :^)

word count | 1,121

an | alright buckle up friends! first jakey fic ever and i'm already drooling over him, i hope you guys love our sweet silly loser(s) as much as i do!

Turning off the taps as you dry your hands against the soft cotton of your apron, it's the particularly quiet sound of the sliding door's latch clicking shut that first raises your suspicions. Glancing at the clock above the stove, you find that it's a little later than usual for Jake to be coming in from the garden, and being familiar with the clumsy boy's nature, you know he'd never be one to close anything with care- unless it was intentional.

Your socked feet pad lightly against the wooden boards of the floor as you cross the kitchen and step out into the living room; as you switch on the lights, the sight you're met with brings a light laugh to your chest. Jake stands halfway across the room, tip-toeing almost comically as he peeks down at something he's got tucked in his favorite green t-shirt, the fabric of the garment being stretched out to use like a little kangaroo pouch.

The blonde jumps at the sudden illumination of the room, his hand quickly closing the flap of fabric down to conceal whatever he's got hidden in his shirt as he looks up at you with wide eyes, like a deer in the headlights; "H-hey, sweetcheeks! I was just finishing up outside- sorry to keep you waiting."

Giggling softly to yourself, you lean a shoulder against the frame of the archway, crossing your arms as you give the man a nod. "That's okay, looks like you might've been busy out there. What's that you've got in your shirt, handsome?" you question gently, your amused smile only growing wider as you watch the little lump wiggle beneath the layer of fabric.

"O-oh this? I- it's nothing," Jake laughs off awkwardly, doing his best to keep whatever the creature is from escaping its hiding spot. "It's just... I was just gonna go look for..." As his voice trails off, a look of knowing guilt forms on his face as he sighs, raising his brow in a silent plea.

"Jakey, baby," you hum softly.

"I know, I know," he tries, "but please, y/n- hear me out..."

"Honey, if it's another 'possum, I'm about to lock you both outside for the night," you warn playfully, earning a quick shake of the head as you nod, relieved.

"No, no ma'am. Learned my lesson last time," he promises, slowly starting to step toward you as he keeps his hand closed over the pouch.

"It better not be a squirrel either, or a rat. Or a-"

"No, petal. None'a those things. It's... y/n, come here. You gotta look. He's so..." Carefully opening up the flap, you watch as the adorable dork peers in at what's inside, his cheeks squishing up in delight as he almost squeals before looking back up at you, his voice a little stronger this time, "Cutie, come here. You gotta see him."

Sighing, you oblige, inching a few feet closer to get a better look as he once again opens up the pouch, reaching in to pull out a tiny orange kitten with big blue eyes, its little body wriggling gently against the man's large hands. "Oh honey..." you coo.

"I know, I know, just look at him," Jake whispers, his voice swelling with affection as his eyes look over the precious little creature, completely enchanted by its charm. Warmth grows in your chest as you watch more than anything Jake watching the kitten, the endearingness of the whole situation undeniable.

"Where'd you find him?" you ask softly, reaching an arm out to guide the two to the couch.

Lowering himself slowly against the cushions as you take a seat next to him, Jake reveals, "Over by the pond. Poor little guy was trying to drink the water like the ducks- his eyes look like they haven't been open for too long; I think he needs milk. Looked everywhere for his mama, couldn't find her. He was helpless out there," he frowns, his voice almost sounding like he could be on the verge of tears.

Wrapping your arm around him gently, you rub his shoulder soothingly. "We'll have to get a little bottle then, huh?" you hum. Big blue eyes looking up at you, Jake swallows hard.

"You mean... we can keep him?" he whispers.

"Well, it seems like he might need us to, right?" you reason. The man simply nods. "You're right; he's awfully little. Looks like he needs a new mama, and I think I might know just the loser for the job." Chuckling softly, Jake nods, looking down at the small animal as it curls up in his hands.

"I think he might've imprinted on me," he tells you.

Letting out a light laugh, you ask, "Oh yeah? Are you sure it wasn't the other way around?"

Jake playfully denies, shaking his head. "No, no, at first I thought it was the ducks. Thought he might've been trying to fall in line with that group of ducklings... but they were moving too fast for him. As soon as I scooped him up, I think he knew he was mine, that I was gonna take care of him."

"Such a sweet little guy," you croon, reaching out gently to run a few careful fingers over the sleepy kitten. Turning a bit on his side, it lets out the tiniest yawn, little white paws stretching out before curling back up comfortably, cradled in the hands of its new "mama."

"He is a guy, I checked," Jake informs you. "Never had a cat before, so I'm not an expert on any of this, but I'm guessing he's only a few weeks old. Just a little loser," he dotes lovingly, running his thumb over the creature's head, smoothing back its fur from its closed eyes.

"Don't you have a thing against cats?" you ask, brow furrowing as you faintly remember him once sharing some weird snippet of knowledge during one of his ramblings, probably pulled from one of his hundreds of encyclopedias. "Something about... cats can't be trusted?"

"Yeah, maybe... but look at him," he gushes, clearly all hostilities towards the species now pushed to the side. "Little man probably can't form a single coherent thought; there's no way he's plotting any evil schemes yet. And I'm gonna raise him good, raise him right. He's gonna be a man of character and integrity."

"Isn't he so lucky," you hum happily, resting your head against the blonde's shoulder as you both look over the little bundle of joy. "Alright. Milk, bottles, we'll need a litter box... you driving?"

"Sorry, I can't," he whispers as he brings the sleeping kitten up to kiss its tiny head. "Mama's gotta hold the baby. We're takin' your car."

[ray-ray-writings]

Defending Family-Technoblade, Wilbur Soot, and Tommyinnit

This is a Brother!Technoblade & Brother!Wilbur Soot &Brother!Tommyinnit x gn!reader. This is not in the dreamsmp but it is in the SBI AU where Philza is the father of Wilbur, Technoblade, Tommy and in this imagine, Y/N! In this, Y/N is younger than Wilbur and Techno but older than Tommy

When Y/N hears the school bully talking shit about their family… Well it’s no surprise when that bully gets hit. 

Y/N’s POV

“Y/N! Wake up!” The annoying voice of my even more annoying brother sounded as a pillow smacked me in the face waking me from my sleep. My eyes shot open and I made contact with Tommy’s blue eyes, “Ow Tommy! What the hell?!?” I exclaimed, sitting myself up, rubbing the bridge of my nose trying to ease the throbbing pain. Tommy simply threw his head back and cackled before bolting out of the room. 

I let out a sigh before throwing the blankets off of me before getting out of bed to get ready for the day. It didn’t take long. I stripped off my PJs and threw on a random outfit before making my way to the bathroom to do my business. As I was brushing my hair, Tommy pounded on the door, “HURRY UP Y/N! I need in there!” He yelled from the other side of the door. I rolled my eyes and yelled back, “You should have thought of that before you woke me up! You can wait!” Tommy continued to knock on the door, annoying me even further. 

Finally, once I was done, I swung the door open causing Tommy to stumble forward. I smirked as he caught himself and looked at me in annoyance, “Finally!” He let out, walking further in while I walked out. “Shut up,” I responded, the door slamming closed behind me. 

I made my way downstairs to the kitchen where I found my father over the stove and my two other brothers sitting at the kitchen island waiting for my dad to finish making breakfast. “Good morning,” I beamed, sitting on the stool in between Wilbur and Techno causing everyone to turn to me for a moment. Dadza grinned at me before going back to his skillet, “Morning honey, how’d you sleep?” “I slept fine. I would have preferred a different wake up call though,” I answered, rolling my eyes at the thought. My older brothers both let out laughs as Dadza sighed, “What did he do this time?” Dadza questioned, turning around, bringing the pan with him. “He smacked my face with a pillow and yelled at me… Nothing new, but still not something preferred.” Dadza nodded as he scooped eggs from the skillet onto the plate before me. He then proceeded to turn and also place a pancake and a couple slices of bacon on my plate as well. “Thank you,” I thanked sincerely, picking up my fork and knife, digging in. “Anytime kiddo.” 

As the three of us ate, footsteps bounded down the stairs behind. “Morning,” Tommy called, sitting on the open stool next to Wilbur. “Morning,” the three responded. Dadza moved quickly and filled Tommy’s plate with breakfast before moving to fill his own. “Sleep well Tommy?” He asked, sitting on the one stool that sat across from us. “Yep! Had an amazing dream where I married a hot woman and then I woke up and smacked Y/N in the face to wake them up. Pretty Pogchamp morning,” Tommy babbled, his mouth full of eggs as he spoke. Dadza made a face of disgust, “Please don’t speak with your mouth full Tommy. And please stop smacking your sibling in the face to wake them up, you know they hate it.” “Oh I know they hate it. That’s why I keep doing it,” Tommy announced, smirking at me from the other side of our brother. “If Wilbur wasn’t here right now, I’d smack you,” I hissed, glaring at my little brother. “But he is and so you can’t do anything,” Tommy teased, sticking his tongue out at me. I looked up to Wilbur, my eyes pleading at him to do something. Wilbur got the message and raised his hand and smacked the back of Tommy’s head, causing him to yelp. “Hey!” “You asked for it!” 

“Kids! Kids! Please, can we just have a calm morning for once?” our dad slightly pleaded. I let out a deep breath and nodded, “Anything for you dad,” I muttered before shoving more pancake into my mouth. Tommy huffed, but also went back to his breakfast. “Now that that’s over, what are you doing today?” Techno questioned, looking to our father. Philza smiled at the change of topic, “Well there are a few new clients at work that I have been in charge of so I’ll mostly be pretty busy all day. I’ll be home in time for dinner though, do you guys want me to pick something up or can you handle it.” Before Tommy or I could ask for pizza, Techno and Wilbur spoke up at the same time, “We can handle it.” I couldn’t help but huff and slightly pout. I really wanted pizza. 

I didn’t have time to dwell on it though because an alarm went off causing the four of us kids to jump into action. The alarm was set in order to get us out of the house because if we didn’t leave at that specific time, we would be late for school. Techno and Wilbur no longer went to high school, they both graduated three years ago. But the two still took us to school everyday so Dadza wouldn’t have to worry about it. Wilbur was the only one that could drive, and as much as he hates to admit it, Techno hates being left alone so he always came along. 

The four of us finished the food on our plates, placing them in the sink. “Bye Dadza,” I chimed, giving him a hug and a kiss on the cheek before heading to the door. I could hear the other three doing the same before they joined me by the door. I slipped on my back pack, Tommy doing the same, before exiting the house and piling into Wilbur’s car. The ride to school consisted of Wilbur, Tommy, and I screaming along to whatever music was playing, and Techno pretending to be annoyed by the three of us. 

“Alright. Get out,” Wilbur demanded, putting the car in park outside the front of the high school. “Thank you Will. Bye Tech! Love you both!” I chimed before getting out of the car. “Bye Y/N, love you too” They responded before I shut the door. Tommy echoed what I had said, getting the same response before he closed his door as well. Wilbur drove away leaving Tommy and I standing there. “Come on Tommathy” I stated before walking toward the entrance of the school. “Don’t call me that” Tommy demanded, but followed close behind me. I threw my head back in laughter and shook my head. “I’ll do what I please thank you.” 

Once we were inside, Tommy and I went separate ways. He went to his locker to meet up with his best friend, Tubbo and I went to mine meeting up with my best friend, Sapnap. Sapnap and I became best friends due to our brothers. Dream and George were pretty good friends with Wilbur and Techno and when they went places Dadza sometimes forced them to take me with them so he could take care of Tommy. Dream and George would in turn bring their younger brother, Sapnap, so that we would stay out of their way. We grew very close through all the hang out time and it was like I had yet another brother. 

“Hey dork,” I greeted my best friend as I opened my locker. “Hey loser. Have a good night?” He greeted back, leaning against the locker next to me. I hummed and nodded at his question, “Yeah, it was pretty good. Did you get the math homework done?” I asked, closing my locker and turning to him. A panicked look over took his face, “We had math homework?” I couldn’t help but laugh at my best friend’s forgetfulness. “Yes we did. And lucky for you I did it… Yes you can copy it.” I answered his unasked question. Sapnap immediately relaxed. A chuckle escaped his lips as he slung an arm around my shoulder, “You’re the best.” “Yeah, yeah.” 

Together the two of us made our way to our first class, but a familiar voice caused me to stop in my tracks, “Come on man. Just give it back!” It was Tommy. Sapnap gave me a confused look as I turned around and marched toward the sound of my brother’s voice. My blood began to boil at the sight in front of me. There, in front of my brother, stood Chad, the school bully. In his hand was one of Tommy’s most prized possessions, his music disc. That was the last thing that our mom gave to him before she passed. He loved it so dearly and was very careful with it. Why was it here and why the hell does Chad have it? 

“Oh what? You gonna cry about it? Cry like you did when your mommy died?” Chad taunted, holding the disc close to his chest. It didn’t take a detective to tell that Tommy’s eyes were welling with tears. “Please, just give it back,” Tommy practically begged, holding his hand out. “Oh I’ll give it back alright. I’ll give it back in pieces.” Chad brought the disc out and put both hands on it. Before he could begin to bend it, I snapped. “HEY!” I shouted, stomping up to the three boys, Sapnap following behind me. Chad stopped what he was doing, surprised at the new voice, but the smirk returned to his face once he recognized who it was. “Well, looky at what we have here,” He taunted. Paying no mind to his taunt, “Give me the music disc. Now.” I demanded, glaring at the boy. Chad simply threw his head back and laughed, “No, I don’t think I will.” 

“You’re a jerk Chad,” Sapnap spoke up, momentarily distracting the bully, allowing me to rip the disc from Chad’s hands. “Hey!” He let out, his head whipping back to me. “Here Tommy,” I spoke gently, handing the possession back to its rightful owner. Tommy carefully took it before wrapping it back up and sliding it carefully in his book bag. “Thanks Y/N” Tommy thanked quietly. “Anytime Tommy. Let’s go boys,” I demanded before slightly pushing Tommy and Tubbo so they would walk in front of me. 

“That’s right! Run away! Just like your father did when things got tough!” Chad called from behind us. His words caused me to stop in my tracks. “What did you just say?” I hissed over my shoulder. Chad simply smirked and crossed his arms, “You heard me, your father’s a coward. So are your other brothers. Wilbur and Techno? Yeah they’re freaks and you’re just like them,” He responded smugly. I felt a tug on my arm. I looked back in front of me and found Tommy standing there with an extremely worried look on his face. “Come on Y/N. It’s not worth it.” I let out a deep breath before nodding and taking a few steps forward once more. 

As I was walking, a force shoved me from behind causing me to stumble, “That’s right, walk away.” For the third time today, I stopped walking. A smirk covered my face as I slid my backpack off of my back. I mean hey, he started it by pushing me. “What? Did I make you upset? What are you-” I didn’t let Chad finish. 

In one swift motion, I turned on my heel and punched Chad in the face as hard as I could. Chad stumbled back in utter shock, his hand coming up to cover his nose. When he pulled his hand back, it was covered in blood. “You punched me!” He shouted incredulously. “You punched me in the face!” “And I’ll do it again!” In one quick moment, we both rushed forward at each other. Punches were being thrown left and right. A few landed on me, but I didn’t care. The only thing I cared about was defending my family. 

At one point, I stomped on Chad’s toes causing him to lose balance and I pushed him to the ground on his back. I dropped on top of him, straddling his chest and just began wailing on him. “Y/N! Y/N stop! You’ve got him! Stop!” Someone yelled from behind me. I didn’t care to listen to them, the sight of Chad helpless under me too much to pass up. As I wound up for another punch, my arm was being pinned to my side and I was pulled off of the bully. “Let me go!” I screeched, trying so hard to wiggle out of the person’s arms. They turned me around to face them and grabbed my shoulders, shaking me slightly. “Y/N!” It was Sapnap, “It’s over. You knocked him out. It’s done!” His words finally hit me and I stopped fighting in his arms. 

I looked over at Chad and noticed his eyes were closed and his face was bloody and beaten. I looked down at my hands and found them also covered in blood and my knuckles were busted and would surely bruise. I also knew from the feeling that my face was also covered in blood. I couldn’t help but let out a small laugh at what had just happened. Sapnap looked at me like I was actually crazy. I gave him a little shrug, “Oops.” “Y/N MINECRAFT! TO THE OFFICE NOW!” 

So there I found myself sitting in the principal’s office, holding an ice pack to my knuckles. Tommy, Tubbo, Sapnap had given their testimony as to what had happened to the principal before they were sent back to class. Chad was still laid up in the nurse’s office. He was waiting there until his parents could come. They had informed me they had to call my parents as well. I begged them not to call my dad, I knew today was a big important day for his business. The secretary, who knew me very well and knew I was a good kid, agreed and instead called my big brothers to come pick me up. That almost made me more nervous than if my father were to pick me up. 

It didn’t take long for Wilbur and Techno to show up. Neither of them looked at me when they walked in, which caused a pit to form in my stomach. The principal gave them a very brief description as to what had happened, just that I had got in a physical fight and was suspended for today and the next two days. “Let’s go,” Wilbur muttered as he passed me, walking out the door, Techno following behind him. I scrambled up quickly, wishing the secretary goodbye before following my brother’s out the door. 

The car ride back home was deadly silent. The radio wasn’t even on. Wilbur and Techno didn’t talk to me or each other the entire ride. Wilbur pulled into our driveway, parked, and killed the engine. He remained in his seat though, and didn't make a move to get out of the car, causing me to remain seated as well. “This isn’t like you, Y/N. What the hell happened?” Wilbur asked quietly, not turning to look at me. “He took Tommy’s disc,” I murmured quietly. “What? Speak up,” Wilbur demanded, looking at me through the rear-view mirror. “He took Tommy’s disc!” I spilled, getting it off my chest. “He took Tommy’s disc and wouldn’t give it back. So I got it back and then when we were walking away, he made fun of dad and you two and Tommy pulled me along, but then Chad shoved me so I turned around and punched him. When he continued to come at me, I fought him. I knocked him out. But he deserved it. He can’t just make fun of you and Techno and dad and Tommy and get away with it and-” “Y/N!” Techno interjected, cutting me off. “Yeah?” I asked, kind of breathless. “He took Tommy’s disc? And then made fun of our family? And proceeded to shove you?” Techno questioned, making sure he understood the story. I nodded, “Yeah”

There was a brief moment of silence before Techno broke out in a laugh, causing Wilbur to grin. “Well good on you then!” Techno cheered, belly laughing. “You’re not mad?” I questioned, still a bit hesitant. Wilbur let out a sigh and shook his head no, “I was at first… Well maybe not. I think I was more surprised than anything. We’ve never had that problem with you and it shocked me to the core to get that phone call. If anything I thought it would be Tommy first.” We all had a laugh about that. “But hearing you did that to defend us. Our family. How could I be mad at that?” 

Wilbur took off his seatbelt and got out of the car, causing Techno and I to do the same. As I got out, Wilbur scooped me up in a big hug. Techno quickly made his way around the car and joined our hug. “I’m so proud of you for defending yourself and your family. Although, next time I would prefer it if you did it without the violence,” Wilbur claimed, pressing a soft kiss to the top of my head. “I wouldn’t. The more violence the better!” Techno chimed in. Giggles escaped my lips at that, of course he would say something like that. “I think I’ll try and lay low for a while. Although now everyone knows not to mess with Y/N Minecraft!” The other two joined in my laughter. “Come on Y/N. Let’s get you cleaned and bandaged up and then we’ll go for ice cream.” Wilbur said, pulling away from the hug and dragging me toward the house. I raised my eyebrow as we got inside, “It’s 8 in the morning?” Wilbur shook his head and rolled his eyes as he sat me down in the kitchen, Techno leaving to get the first aid kit. “There is never a wrong time for ice cream”

There you have it! I hope you enjoyed! If so, please be sure to leave a like!!

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 308: VIBE: CHECKED

Previously on BnHA: Lots and lots of Shindou idk what else to tell you.

Today on BnHA: Tired Nomad Deku rescues Shindou from Muscular, and us from Shindou. Muscular is all “OH BOY I SURE CAN’T WAIT TO FIGHT DEKU AGAIN AFTER HE TOTALLY KICKED MY ASS THE LAST TIME!! I’M SURE THIS TIME WILL GO DIFFERENTLY SEEING AS HE’S HAD ALMOST AN ENTIRE YEAR’S WORTH OF ADDITIONAL TRAINING, AND ALSO HAS SIX FOURQUIRKS NOW, IN ADDITION TO THE CONFIDENCE THAT COMES WITH HAVING EIGHT OTHER PEOPLE’S SOULS CHILLING OUT INSIDE HIM OFFERING MORAL SUPPORT AND ENCOURAGEMENT.” Deku is all, “[kicks Muscular’s ass effortlessly].” Muscular is all, “[gets his ass totally kicked].” I for one am very satisfied with this, and with respect to all, I would like to hereby declare this post a discourse-free zone. I’m just happy to see my son out here making good use of his FOURQUIRKS, and more importantly beating Muscular in less than seventeen pages so we can all go on with our lives lol.

damn Deku since when were you allowed to look this cool

from this perspective and with the smoke, cape, backpack, and mask more or less obscuring his actual profile, he looks less like a sixteen-year-old boy and more like a grownass man

OH SNAP

we got a glimpse of this in the cleaned-up scan of 307, but seeing both of his eyes looking so distinctively All Might-esque here is... whoa. I mean we know that his face still looks pretty normal underneath the mask and he doesn’t actually have the black sclera, but still, this is an awesome look. mini-Might

lol Muscular

you and me both. I mean no offense, but yeah

so Deku is just standing there silently

typical Deku. tight-lipped and expressionless. mum’s the word. quiet as a mouse. silent as a grave

okay no but seriously this is so weird and creepy though you guys. Deku please say something or else I’m just gonna mindlessly say whatever stupid things come into my head in an effort to make things less awkward

so Muscular is all “I should probably make a cool speech about revenge but Horikoshi couldn’t think of anything good so I’m just going to stand here clenching my fist real slowly”

“I’m not here to go on a monologue” he says, as he monologues about not monologuing

okay you guys I confess I have only read through/watched the Deku VS Muscular fight once because the arm-breaking is just way too uncomfortable for me to revisit. and so as a result, I have completely forgotten Whatever The Deal Is with Muscular’s eye lmao so let me go look it up real quick

okay so it’s a prosthetic, obviously, and he changes it out according to his mood. that part does sound familiar. I just can’t remember which eye is supposed to indicate which mood. don’t tell me I actually have to go back and reread this shit

lol I’m skimming through chapter 75 now and remembering/realizing that I hardly paid any attention to this the first time around because as soon as I found out the villains were after Kacchan my brain was like “TIME TO FOCUS ON THIS AND ONLY THIS NOW AND FOREVER” and yeah. ah memories

anyway so he started out with the flower-looking eye, and then later on he was all

which begs the question, how on earth could I have ever forgotten the most ridiculous panel I’ve ever read lmao

anyway, but so after all of that, I'm only just now realizing that this isn't one of his previous eye prosthetics in the current chapter; this is an ACTUAL FUCKING ROCK that he's just randomly shoved into his eye socket fkdsjlk

so basically (1) I did all of that painstaking research for nothing, five whole minutes of my life wasted THANKS A LOT, and (2) what, and I have never meant this more emphatically, THE FUCK

anyway so now he's leaping at the building that Deku is standing on top of. but he’s not aiming anywhere near Deku though, wtf

(ETA: HAHA YOU BROKE ALL YOUR MUSCLES YOU LOSER.)

...huh

lmao okay then. I hope those annoying citizens in the building next door are watching this go down and rethinking their life choices

dlkdkljk

just keep standing there pressed right up against the window, why don’t you. “WHAT’S GOING ON THIS SUPER CLOSE COLLAPSING BUILDING IS BLOCKING OUR VIEW.” well, folks, we’ve long since known there’s a critical shortage of hero and villain brain cells, but what we’re learning now is that civilian brain cells are also in short supply

OH THANK GOD DEKU IS FINALLY TALKING THAT WAS ACTUALLY UNSETTLING AS FUCK

SO HE’S STILL OUR GOOD, POLITE, WORRIED, CONSIDERATE DEKU UNDERNEATH THAT COOL AND MYSTERIOUS VENEER. for real, thank fuck, because I swear to god if he suddenly started acting like the Dekus in all of the vigilante AUs my interest in this series would have dropped something like 50% lol. just because he dropped out of school and ran away from home and is currently dressed like the physical manifestation of a Linkin Park playlist doesn’t mean he’s not still the WORLD’S BIGGEST DORK okay

I MEAN, THIS RIGHT HERE. THIS IS WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT. HE’S APOLOGIZING FOR THE DELAY

PLEASE FIND THE ATTACHED SHINDOU YOU REQUESTED. BEST REGARDS!!!

OH MY GOD WHY IS HE SUCH A BADASS

something about making bold, confident statements while obscured in smoke?? idk but damn it fucking works

ffjkkl

more importantly, should you tell him you actually need your copy of Shindou in excel format and not pdf?? on the one hand you don’t want to sound ungrateful, but on the other hand what are you even supposed to do with this

this chapter so far consists of like 50% smoke, but on the other hand Deku VS Kacchan 2 had a lot of cinematic smoke too so who am I to complain

OMG IS IT HIS ARMS

IDK DID YOU?! TELL ME YOUR SECRETS. PLEASE, AT SOME POINT THIS FIGHT HAS GOT TO ACTUALLY ADVANCE THE PLOT

OHHHHHHH

IT’S EN’S QUIRK!! OH MY GOD OKAY THAT’S ACTUALLY AWESOME

I CAN HEAR THE SOUND OF DISCOURSE RUMBLING IN THE BACKGROUND BUT I DON’T CARE LOL. WON’T CATCH ME EVER SAYING NO TO ANOTHER SIXQUIRK. GO AHEAD, BRING THEM ON, I WANT TO SEE THEM ALL but take it easy though Deku. don’t want to give yourself lung cancer or anything

also it’s good to see that in a very real sense he’s not fighting alone. the Vestiges really did mean it when they said they could appear more easily now. this is on a whole other level

so is this whole next page still En talking, or someone else? because whoever it is sure is chatty

okay, several things

pretty sure it is En, because he keeps saying “I suppose.” for someone who never said two words until one page ago, this guy sure never shuts up. we can’t all follow Muscular’s lead I suppose. oh my god now I’m doing it too

really like the suggestion of Deku using the SIXQUIRKS like tools in an arsenal, because that’s what he’s good at! it’s almost like he’s been training for this his entire life. “you value quirks too much” LOOK HE JUST THINKS THEY’RE COOL OKAY IS THAT A CRIME

where the fuck did all this rope come from

not gonna ask what the fuck that thing is sticking out from the back of his utility belt. Horikoshi will surely explain this

is that a fucking jetpack. I’m sorry Deku were six fucking quirks not enough for you. you can fucking float??? but JUST TO BE SAFE, LET’S STRAP A PAIR OF ROCKETS TO OUR SHOULDERS IDK

-- or wait, is this all supposed to be like a visual representation of En’s metaphor?? OH MY GOD AM I JUST STUPID LOL, DON’T ANSWER THAT. NEVER MIND. NEW LIST!!

rope = blackwhip

jetpack = float

radio = danger sense

and so I’m guessing that this ridiculously phallic thing is supposed to be a flare or something?? and that = the new quirk, smokescreen. well that was a fucking ride lmao we now return you to our regularly scheduled chapter

so now Deku is floating to his heart’s content and thinking that he’ll just sneak up on Muscular and vibe check his ass or whatever

WOOOOOOOO DANGER SENSE YESSSS I LOVE THIS FOR HIM

okay guys, I'm gonna press pause here for a sec to make a serious note, because I am loving the shit out of this, but tbh I'm having trouble enjoying it as much as I want to because I keep getting anxious thinking about the discourse. I know that a lot of the fandom has very strong opinions on Deku's character development one way or the other, and I want to respect that. but I also really have no spoons to debate this topic at all beyond what I’ve already weighed in on. so if it’s all the same to everyone, I plan on staying out of this discussion, at least this week

anyway! that said, YEAH BOI GET HIS ASS

VIBE: CHECKED. CURB: STOMPED. HOTEL: TRIVAGO

-- OF COURSE HE’S STILL FUCKING FINE LOL HE CRASHES INTO BUILDINGS FOR FUN IDK WHAT I WAS EXPECTING

dammit Muscular. how many fucking quirks does it take to beat you?! the annoying thing is that even with all of his cool new powers, Deku is still something of a mismatch against him. anyway r.i.p. to all these poor buildings

OOOOOHHHHH

you guys have no idea how intrigued I am at the prospect of watching Deku try to play both good cop and bad cop here lmao

anyway so Muscular says he doesn’t know, go figure

“I’m not here to make small talk or anything” he says as he small talks about not small talking

OH MY GOD DEKU

are you really gonna talk no jutsu all of these villains from now on?? that last battle really did have a profound impact on you, huh! interesting

you guys he’s really doing it omg

Deku this guy tried to murder a five-year-old literally just for fun. I mean more power to you, but holy shit you’re really gonna try to defeat Muscular with anger management therapy huh

I MEAN

WHO COULD HAVE SEEN THAT RESPONSE COMING dlkjslkjk

FUCK’S SAKE DEKU, I KNOW YOU MEAN WELL BUT THEY CAN’T ALL HAVE TRAGIC PASTS KIDDO

but. I have to admit, I do still like that he tried. probably knew just as well as we did what the end result was going to be, but still. he made the effort in good faith and I respect that

uh oh

why do I get the feeling Muscular just got a whole lot deader

oh my god oh my god he’s doing the “powering up” stance ffff don’t fucking tell me you can still use your fucking arms here, Deku

BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY WHAT’S THIS??

okay so basically he’s saying that whatever it was he sensed in Tomura, he doesn’t sense from Muscular. which, yeah, that sounds exactly right. good judge of character here lol

AHHHHAHAHA YESS

WHOOPS, GET FUCKED I GUESS

WOOOOHOOOOOOOO

lmao so apparently this is the belated result of Shindou’s attack from chapter 307?? I’ll be damned. good for you Shindou!! I always liked you buddy. please just take my word on that and don’t fact check that statement

okay lol the one tiny bit of discourse I will allow is that it’s bullshit that he just did that with his right arm. like, I’ll fully acknowledge that. that makes no fucking sense, and I demand an explanation from the Great Plot Hole Filler himself. he’s never let us down before when it comes to continuity so I’m trusting him not to suddenly start now

that said, we love to see a rematch against a boring guy settled quickly and decisively within the span of a single chapter. THANK YOU

I like that Deku implies that his power is being a smart nerd who battles villains using the power of ANALYTICS. he basically didn’t do anything except restrain Muscular and wait for Shindou’s attack to take effect while halfheartedly checking to see if he regretted any of that murder and stuff

(ETA: and almost forgot to mention, he made excellent use of all four of his active SIXQUIRKS. it’s like the chapter title said; this is basically him fighting all-out, and it’s a sight to see.)

also, as cool as the mask was, this just feels right. like, we had our fun, now let us see his face, yes good

anyway, I think this was a good start towards establishing What’s Up With Deku Right Now! so if it’s all the same to Horikoshi, I would next like to take some time to explore Why’s Up With Deku. that, and What’s Up With Everyone Else, Especially Kacchan. por favor

[abbynx]

Match made in Hell

Adrian Chase with a Herbert West-like S/O

Genre: Romantic Headcanons

Warnings: Just your canon-typical violence

A/N: Herbert West is a character from Re animator, who is a mad scientist driven by extreme determination to make a revolutionary discovery to unending life and will do anything to achieve.

The guy's a mad scientist, I recommend Re animator if you like glasses-wearing psychos uwu

- What's worse than an unstable individual? Two unstable individuals who are in a shockingly healthy romantic relationship.

- First and foremost, it took time for you to warm up to him and so did he. But in time, the two of you bonded then boom, here you are.

- He loves the opportunitic dork you are, watching you stab a syringe of glowing green substance on a dead body with a lovely glimmer of determination and curiosity in your eyes— just seeing you light up when the spicemen reacts to the chemicals you injected in them. Awww, just look how cute they are when they opt to kill the witness and use it as another test subject!

- Since your experiments are in need of dead bodies, your darling boy has got you. I mean, the guy doesn't really drag body around, he's used to just leaving them as they are, but for you, he will. The fresher they are, the more happy you are.

- Dead set on making a discovery, you were often busy, much to Adrian's chagrin... But he relents and just watches you shuffle around your makeshift laboratory in the basement, making occasional small talks. Encourage him to just talk and reassure him that you're listening even if you seem awfully distracted and unresponsive, and he will just rant and ramble his heart out.

- When he sees you frustrated about not making progress, he would try his best to cheer you up and get your mind off of it with any means necessary. But he really does care about you and will reassure you that failure is a part of success.

- What annoys Adrian is that you would get too fixated on your work that you would forget to eat and drink, and oh boy, when he discovered your bedroom is prat unused because you sleep in your office, he is dragging you out the lab to feed and water you. And if you insist on staying awake, slaving away on your work, he is going to straddle you to bed if it gets you to stay there.

- Top-tier witty banters on the daily, maybe throw in some name-calling all in light-hearted fun, but if someone else calls Adrian a name you bet their ass will get the scorching hot roasts from you.

- His friends are low-key scared of you, a harmless looking thing from the exterior, but boy oh boy, they do not know what is going on inside your head to be unpredictable. You safe from being subjected from their teasing. Only Chris has been brave to tease you. And they were particularly shocked when you teased him back.

- You would be the worst at dealing with people and their emotions if you're Herbert West-like, but you're there for Adrian and that's good enough for him — for someone to stick with him and remind him that he is not a loser.

- Highkey, Herbert is quite the manipulator and opportunistic motherfucker and if you are the same as him, it's easy for you to get Adrian to do any of your bidding. And Adrian is aware of that and frankly, he doesn't care, he'd do anything for you. He's a ride or die man 😎

- Handholding makes Adrian soft 👉👈 there's nothing like holding your significant other's hand after killing and burying failed test subjects ❤️

- Ahhh, I'm sorry if this seems out of character but imagining Adrian as a total simp for their s/o is cute okay??? Just him making heart eyes at Y/N doing whatever the fuck they are doing and just UGH— MARRY HIM OR I WILL

[meltingpotimagines]

Boyfriend!Kaminari

hope you're ready for some to him a+ flirting

bc this boy is gonna flirt like it's the flirting olympics

kirishima introduced you to the bakusquad and you immediately gained his interest

mostly bc he thought you're cute asjksjk but your personality won him over after he got to know you!

very obvious about it, naturally flirty personality or not

everyone and their mother knows that this boy likes you

but i mean he's so cute and sweet so who could complain?

certainly not you

this lil bundle of electricity lit up your world~

forgive me i don't even like puns i just couldn't resist making a pun in a post about denki

asked you out rather quickly and was shocked when you said yes

immediately went to bakusquad for help bc this boy has n o clue where to take you or what to do

just bc he's a flirt does n o t mean he actually knows what to do when someone reciprocates interest

took you to see a movie

basic, i know, but i mean it's not like it's a bad first date, give the man a break

or don't bc this boy really be making moves

did the ole stretch and wrap his arm around the shoulder trick

winked at you, seemingly "charming" and confident but was internally freaking out bc you didn't slap him

you actually... seemed to like it?

oh you leaned into him you definitely liked it okay

forced himself to relax bc if you liked it then that was a good thing right? this was a good date so far? you were having a good time? right???

hesitantly started running his fingers along your arm, trying to not insinuate anything although he desperately wanted to kiss you

has absolutely no idea how the movie ended

or started

he paid far more attention to you

and by far more i mean all of his attention

he couldn't get over that he was actually on a date with you

like

you actually like him enough to go on a date with him

and you're so hot??

why was a ten like you on a date with him

not that he's complaining

bc out of everyone- even t o d o r o k i- you chose him

and if that wasn't the biggest ego boost ever, he didn't know what was

took you out to eat after at this cute little diner mina suggested

got to hear you talk animatedly about the movie

it had been a movie he overheard you mention you had really wanted to see, and he was glad he chose it because he thought it was so adorable how into it you were

in the midst of your ramble, you'd managed to get a bit of food on your cheek

he hesitated for a moment and then went for it, wiping it off with his thumb and licking it off

he was pleasantly surprised at the blush that spread across your cheeks, and, feeling bold, winked at you

he could feel his confidence growing as he took you home, and with a sudden rush of courage, gave you a quick kiss on your doorstep

his heart skipped s e v e r a l beats when you kissed him back

he waited until you were safely inside before leaving, the dopiest grin on his face

honestly you two started dating purely by accident

he jokingly asked you to be his, not actually expecting you to say yes

which you did bc o f c you did

you're crazy for this boy and i don't blame you

does his best to be a charming prince but honestly is just a dork

will go into a mock bow and kiss your hand

peek up at you through his hair and give you a smirk before jokingly making the fboy face

yk the one

lip bite, raised brows

it's mostly just bc boy doesn't know how to handle his feelings and it's better than straight up tackling you in a massive hug and pressing kisses everywhere

but is it really tho?

is such a good cuddler

he just kinda wraps you up in his arms and buries his face in your hair or neck, nuzzling every so often

but he's also a punk so

random tickles too

honestly a lot of your cuddle sessions get interrupted by tickle fights

loser has to kiss the winner

sometimes he'll lose intentionally just so he can kiss you sooner

he just really loves kissing you

definitely the type to pick you up randomly at 3 am for a night drive

windows down, music blasting

takes a lot of back roads just so no one potentially calls the cops on him

he gets in enough trouble as it is, he doesn't need to be in trouble with the law too

especially as a future pro hero lollllll

has a hand on your thigh at all times

occasionally squeezes it

flirts with you all the time

constant winks, smirks, and pick-up lines

usually cheesy pick-up lines

and when i say cheesy i mean c h e e s y

it doesn't matter that you're dating, he will say every single one he hears or thinks of

"are you a parking ticket? because you've got FINE written all over you."

"feel my shirt. you know what it's made of? boyfriend material."

"are you a charger? bc i'm dying without you!" "denki, you're the one with electricity powers." "okay but you have to admit that was good."

pls he's such a dweeb

tho maybe use a few on him sometimes bc he's a little insecure

you're the most amazing person he's ever met and he doesn't always feel like he's good enough for you

occasionally wonders why and if you actually love him

so the first time you said i love you, the boy nearly shortcircuited

you said it absentmindly while leaving after spending the day with it

it's a habit, we all do it

but this boy

he was so shocked his powers went off and he nearly fried his brain

yes sero managed to see it happen and he didn't stop teasing him for a straight month

it took him a solid minute for his brain to actually function again

looked you dead in the eyes, a little afraid he'd misheard you, and whispered "you love me?"

the biggest grin split his face the second you repeated it

he pulled you into him by the waist and gave you the deepest kiss he'd ever given you

breaking the kiss, he pressed his forehead to yours, a breathless "i love you, too" slipping past his lips

he pulled back to stared into your eyes, his own bright and full of love, before glancing down at your lips and leaning in for another kiss

gets you ring pops or those little rings from the toy machines at the grocery store and jokingly proposes to you all the time

he just loves the way it makes you roll your eyes and giggle

absolutely l o v e s when you sit on his lap or in between his legs when he's playing a game

your his biggest supporter and cheerleader, and it makes him feel even more confident when he plays

also feels the need to show off a little

he's gotta impress the love of his life in any way he can as if he's not already impressive as heck as a frickin future pro hero

also loves it even when he's not playing a game

wraps his arms around your waist and sets his chin on your shoulder

will frequently nuzzle your neck and press kisses onto your shoulder, neck, cheek, and ear

i wasn't kidding when i said he loves kissing you

if you're in physical contact with him, he's going to kiss you

doesn't have to be your lips, just whatever is within reach

if you're cuddling, he'll kiss whatever part of you his lips are closest to

if his head's on your lap, he'll kiss your thighs

if he's using your stomach as a pillow, he'll nuzzle and kiss your stomach

if your head is on h i s lap, he'll lean down to kiss your forehead, nose, or lips

he feels the need to kiss you 24/7, so anytime he gets the chance, he's gonna take it

he loves you okay? and he needs to make sure you always know that

[alltooreid]

hi !!! first of congrats oh my gosh you deserve all of them and more :)

for the blurb celebration could you do a fluff for promot 30 with the reader having she/her pronouns? it could be like friends to lovers with like constant teasing banter and then theyre like oops i accidentally fell in live with you, ya dork? or whatever you want!

thank you so so much, you’re so sweet!! and i love this request omg!!

Prompt: #30: “i'm sick and tired of your attitude”

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader 

Type: Fluffiest Fluff

Word Count: 1.1K

Content Warnings: None! (I think, please let me know if I’m missing something!)

***

“There’s my favorite loser!” Y/N said, ruffling her best friend Spencer Reid's hair as she walked past his desk. “So, what are you doing tonight babe?”

When Y/N started at the BAU, Spencer remembered being overwhelmed and nervous whenever she called him babe, until she called Morgan babe for getting her coffee and Garcia babe when she met her for the first time. What really confirmed for him that Y/N would call anything and everything babe is when she told Hotch “Good morning babe,” on pure accident because she was so used to using it in everyday conversation.

Now Y/N was his best friend, and he found her calling him babe kind of annoying and comical, instead of romantic and flirtatious. However, he couldn’t help but blush when she would ruffle or play with his hair. But Spencer had convinced himself that was a completely natural response, that it meant nothing, and that he definitely had no feelings for Y/N.

“Nothing, really. I’ll probably just stay home,” Spencer said. “I just bought a first edition copy of Pride and Prejudice that is practically begging to be read.”

She rolled her eyes over-dramatically, Spencer laughed, knowing she didn’t actually mean it and was just trying to mess with him. “Or you could do something way better. Instead of reading an incredibly boring book written in old English, you could come to my apartment and we could watch the movie! It’s really good, I promise even you’ll love it.”

Spencer smirked, “I don’t know, movie night sounds fun and all. . .  Maybe I’ll see if Emily wants to watch it with me.”

She laughed, “Oh so now you’re too good for me huh?”

“Maybe I'm just sick and tired of your attitude Y/N,” he said while smiling, they both knew that wasn’t true at all. Spencer found it comforting that Y/N was just as humorous with him as she was with everyone else, sometimes even more so. He often felt that because he was awkward around his coworkers and didn’t always get their sarcasm or jokes that he wasn’t included in the more silly, mundane “water cooler talk.”

Sometimes when he would try to include himself, he would begin to ramble, and by the time he was done most of his friends had walked away. Even more times they would just interrupt him so that he would stop talking.  Yet whenever he would attempt to make himself more conversational, everyone seemed to think it was stupid and a useless endeavor.

But with Y/N, Spencer knew she was willing to take the time to make jokes with him and listen to his interests. So when Y/N made fun of him, he knew that it wasn’t out of malice. He felt comfortable exchanging banter with her; he was never scared of annoying her or messing something up.

“I don’t know how much I believe that Reid. . .  but if you insist I guess I’ll just have to see if Penelope would like this chocolate frosted donut with sprinkles…. What a shame.”

“Wait! Y/N I still definitely want that.”

“Well I’m sure Penelope does as well, and she likes my attitude,” she said, giggling as she walked away.

Not too long after however, Y/N was back, and surprised Spencer by hugging him from behind and nuzzling her head on his shoulder. “Just kidding dork, I would never do that to you,” she dropped the donut onto his desk, “but! I would consider it if you don’t come watch Pride and Prejudice with me tonight.”

He laughed “Don’t worry Y/N, I’ll be there.”

“Yes! I knew it! Pride and Prejudice is on! 7 pm, my apartment, and you better bring snacks.”

She squeezed him again, and then went back to her desk, spinning around a couple of times in her chair and smiling.

Spencer couldn’t help but smile as well, both at the sight in front of him and his newest realization, one that he had buried deep inside himself ever since Y/N started at the BAU.

He was in love with his best friend.

***

“Spencer! You’re finally here! Did you bring snacks?” Y/N said, practically jumping off her couch as Spencer let himself inside; she had a terrible habit of always leaving her door unlocked when she was home.

“What do you mean finally?” he asked, “I’m ten minutes early?”

“Yeah but I’m starving and I really wanna watch this movie,” she radiated excitement, “Now come sit down and cuddle with me.”

This was one of those things that should have made Spencer realize just how much he loved Y/N. Platonic cuddling was not something Spencer was used to, but when it came to Y/N he looked forward to it. Yet now the realization that it was only platonic on one end made Spencer feel awkward.

“You seem tense babe. What’s wrong?” Y/N asked.

“It’s nothing,” he lied.

“Don’t play that game with me Spencer, you’re my best friend. I love you, I know you better than I know myself, you can tell me anything.”

He sighed, “That’s the problem Y/N, you love me, but I realized today that I don’t just love you, I’m in love with you.”

Y/N’s mouth was wide open, and for a second when he looked at her Spencer thought he had ruined everything.

That was until she fit her mouth to his.

“I realized a week ago, it hit me like a truck. When I went to your apartment after the Oregon case, and you read me to sleep because it had affected me so much. I just remember lying there, eyes half shut, and thinking ‘I want to spend the rest of my life with this man, I want to come home to this every single night’ and that’s when I realized I was in love with you.”

“That’s a cuter story than mine, I realized this morning. Something in me finally said that there was no way best friends felt the way I feel around you.”

Y/N pushed his hair off his forehead and planted a kiss there, “Look at us dork,” she said with her lips still brushing the top of his head, “We accidentally fell in love with each other.”

Spencer smiled and then laughed, “Yeah, I guess we did.”

***

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[robbyswayzekeenes]

fuck up our friendship━ eli moskowitz imagine

eli moskowitz x fem!reader

set after the party in 2x09, pretty wholesome with admitting feelings but also angst bc the reader is tryna be friends with both eli and demetri and it is NOT going well

Once the police busted the party, Y/N knew she had to find Eli. The girl was a Miyagi-Do student, and she knew full well that Sam and Robby would not appreciate her going to find her oldest friend and Cobra Kai’s number one asshole, but the pair were having their own issues, so it was unlikely they would find out. Y/N and Eli had been friends since the girl moved to the Valley at the start of freshman year. She wasn’t exactly a loser as someone like Yasmine or Kyler would word it, and many people never understood why she signed away her high school popularity to be friends with the two biggest dorks in school-- Demetri and Eli-- but she wouldn’t have wanted anybody else. Demetri and Eli had been best friends since kindergarten, and the h/c slotted into the group perfectly. They may have had it pretty bad at school, but they had each other.

Then, two years later, at the start of their junior year, karate came back to the Valley. Whilst Y/N and Demetri had always been seemingly content with living their lives as losers, apparently Eli didn’t feel the same. It wasn’t the mohawk or the new name they particularly had a problem with, or his newfound popularity that bothered them. It was the way he went about getting it. Hawk was becoming the very person he had always hated. Both of his best friends knew this wasn’t the person he really was, but when Demetri had addressed this, Eli declared an all out war against him. So now Y/N was left as the middle-man, trying to care for both of her best friends and bring them back together without choosing a side. And neither of them made it easy.

Tonight, at Moon’s party, Y/N had been so hopeful. The two sat talking about Doctor Who whilst the girl stood beside Robby and Sam, sipping her drink and pretending she wasn’t listening in to what Demetri and Eli were talking about. She allowed herself to get distracted for one moment to talk with Robby about skateboarding and suddenly, Eli was pouring his drink all over Demetri’s head. With a shameful sigh, Y/N walked over to the two, handing paper towels to the dark haired boy and raising her eyebrows at Eli. The red haired boy gave her a sheepish, apologetic smile before wandering off to join the other Cobras.

In all fairness, Hawk had it coming when Demetri stood up on that stage with the mic in his hand, but the brown eyed boy didn’t need to take it that far. Watching from where she stood with the other Miyagi-Dos, her e/c eyes flitted between Eli and Demetri. It pained the girl to watch her two best friends fight, but it hurt more knowing she was watching her best friend and the boy she was in love with attempt to tear each other’s heads off. Y/N had developed the biggest crush on Eli in their sophomore year, and everybody knew it except the boy in question. Demetri knew it, too, which was why initially he was so hesitant to launch an attack against his best friend, no matter how much he deserved it. But that night, he hadn’t held back.

Once the cops pulled up outside, everything descended into chaos. Her eyes met with Demetri’s, which were filled with remorse, and he nodded at her. “Go find him. Make sure he’s okay.” Y/N offered the boy a small smile in return. She knew Demetri still cared for Eli, and Eli still cared for Demetri. It was just Hawk who appeared not to. Rushing out the house so as not to get caught by the police, the h/c found Eli walking out the back of the house alone. The rest of the Cobras weren’t around, which reassured Y/N, but only slightly. “Eli!” She called, causing his head to swing around, his blue eyes catching hers. “What do you want? Come to humiliate me even more?” “Eli,’ The girl breathed in response, sounding exasperated as she caught up to him. “You know I wouldn’t do that.” “I didn’t think Demetri would, either,” He responded, allowing Y/N to see how hurt he really was. “And I didn’t think you would attack him when we were at the mall the other day. Or pour beer on his head.” Eli let out a sigh-- he was Eli now he was around Y/N. She was the only person he trusted enough to let his newfound guard down around.

“I’ve told you this before, Y/N,” The red haired boy said with a sigh. “Demetri chose his side. He went against us. Against Cobra Kai.” “I don’t need to hear it again, Eli,” The h/c haired girl huffed. “I’m just here to make sure you’re okay. Cobra Kai or not, you’re my best friend. I care about you, and so does Demetri.” “Whatever,” The boy exhaled, but he still allowed Y/N to walk the rest of the way home with him, and even come in when he opened the door and headed inside. “Mom isn’t home,” Eli spoke, closing the door and flicking off his shoes, “She’s on night shift tonight.” “Good job I’m here then,” Y/N nodded, knowing how much the blue eyed boy hated being alone. Eli didn’t say anything in response, just smiled smally.

Any alcohol consumed at the party that evening had begun to wear off, as Eli and Y/N sat on the couch in the front room. The silence was awkward for the first few moments; it always was now that there was a clear divide pushing the two apart, but both of them more than anything wanted to stay close. As much as Y/N’s crush on Eli was clear as day (to everyone other than him), the boy’s reciprocated feelings were much better hidden, especially with his new Hawk facade. However, Cobra Kai had thrown in the spanner in the works, and any chance the boy may have had with his best friend was seemingly gone. Yet, every few nights the girl would still come over and spend time with Eli, alternating the time she used to spend with both her best friends.

Eventually, the awkwardness faded, and the two would begin to speak about anything and everything they hadn’t caught up on, considering they had spent most of the summer apart at their separate dojos. An hour or so past, taking the time up to midnight, before Eli invited Y/N to stay the night like she had many times before. The h/c hastily agreed, and followed Eli upstairs to his bedroom, yawning quietly due to exhaustion. Once they made it up, her e/c eyes widened. “What the fuck happened in here?” The once blue walls, littered with posters, were now red and bare. A punching bag stood where a fake TARDIS used to be, and there wasn’t a funko pop in sight, which was not at all like Eli Moskowitz. The bedsheets were just plain black, rather than Star Wars themed, but when the h/c craned her neck, there were still small, glow-in-the-dark stars littered across the ceiling. “I redecorated,” Was all Eli said, flopping down on his bed.

Y/N flopped down beside him. “I think I preferred the Doctor Who merch,” The girl admitted honestly, causing Eli to look at her with wide eyes. “Did you know the new Doctor was female?” “Of course,” The h/c smiled, “Me and Demetri still watch every Friday night.” At the mention of this, Eli’s face fell, causing Y/N to frown. “You know he didn’t really want to hurt you tonight,” The girl sighed, attempting to lock eyes with Eli who was staring down at his fidgeting fingers. “It was a shitty thing to do, but you’ve both done shitty things to each other.” She continued her speech, becoming more and more passionate as she spilled her frustration out to Eli: “Do you know how hard it is for me to watch my two best friends fight with each other? Over something as petty as a fucking karate dojo! I know that I can’t stop you two fighting and the best I can do is try and maintain the middle ground, because the last thing I want to do is choose between my best friend and the others at Miyagi-Do, and the boy I’ve had feelings for since forever.”

Y/N’s voice began to fade out as she calmed down, but Eli was still staring at her, seemingly in shock. Noticing how panicked the boy looked, the girl’s face softened. “I’m sorry for yelling, Eli, I-” “You said you had feelings for me.” His voice was deadpan, showing no emotions as his blue eyes bore into Y/N. The girl’s mouth opened and closed in shock. “I- Maybe I said that. Accidentally. Maybe-” “You have feelings for me?” Eli spoke again, and for a second, he sounded like Eli, like the person he was before all this karate shit took over. With a sigh, the girl nodded. “Congratulations. You’re officially the last person to know.” “Why didn’t you tell me?” The boy asked, his eyes wide. “I don’t know,” The girl shrugged. “Guess I didn’t wanna fuck up our friendship, but I guess karate’s doing that for us.” Y/N’s e/c eyes chose to rest on the bed sheets beneath her instead of on Eli as he responded. “Well, what if I want to fuck up our friendship?” At this comment, however, the girl’s eyes shot up, just in time for Eli to place his hand on her chin and placed his lips against hers.

She was shocked at first, but Y/N soon kissed back, placing her hands on the boy’s face to pull him closer. The girl felt him smile into the kiss as he rolled himself closer, wrapping a hand round her waist to draw her in. “I’ll fuck up our friendship a hundred times over if it means I can do that again,” Y/N smiled, resting her forehead against his. Eli kissed her once again, softly, before saying: “For the record, I like you, too. I’m surprised Demetri didn’t tell you.” “That rat!” Y/N exclaimed, though she wasn’t really annoyed. “I’m going to kill him!” “Right now?” Eli asked, quirking his eyebrow with a cocky smirk. “Hm, maybe not,” The girl grinned, biting her lip and pulling the boy closer. “I think I’ll just stay here and kiss you.”