#this is where i'm at and i'm quite comfortable

[the-fab-fox]

This is so true. I recently saw a recipe for a really healthy meal on a recipe blog. I clicked the author's name and found my way to their actual domained website. In their about, I found the email. I have emailed them asking if there was a way to do the recipe but in a crockpot due to the pretty unsafe environment I live in—due to the skuzzy way my roommate/Subletter acts, I don't feel safe using the kitchen. I have not received an answer but from my experience sending out emails to people one would not generally consider, I know one of two things will happen. They will simply not respond (that is to say ignore or disregard my email) or they will answer and let me know if it can be done or let me know they don't have the time or energy to offer that solution. And these two options aren't bad at all. There's no consequence.

So even if they *don't* answer, what's the problem with asking when the worst outcome is simply no answer. You're literally losing nothing no matter the outcome, and more times than you think you're gaining something.

A few more examples on this:

I'm very much a networker. I am a people person and really good at striking up random conversations with people. Been that way my whole life. I just love interacting and helping people. (I'm a customer service professional of 20 years if that says anything).

I also am pretty intermediate with computers and very good at writing resumes and cover letters for job resumes and things like that. A lot of that comes from the fact that when I was younger, if I wanted something that could only come from a specific person/company/entity/etc, I would search and research until I found the contact needed.

Sometimes I'd be pleasantly surprised, sometimes not. But I never lost anything by trying.

A few times I was pleasantly surprised:

I was/am really into Criminal Minds as a TV show. Got into it in my 20s. It's become a comfort show (as weird as that is for a show about a fictionalized Behavioral Analysis Unit in the FBI). I was thinking... What would it take to be a BAU agent. It's probably nothing like the show so what's it like really. So I went on USAjobs.gov to look into it. Found contact for FBI. Emailed with a well edited and professional email (yes, this is absolutely important if you want to be taken seriously—if anyone would like me to draft up an example of what that could look like in a specific scenario, I'm happy to help!) as well as I could at the age I was at (basically, write it as well written and professional as you know how at where you're at now—don't try to "sound" professional and use big words. Just write as you but more formal). Lo and behold, I got my answer and it was quite thorough and they even warned me that the team as is seen on the show is very over glorified and the BAU mostly consults from afar and very rarely goes into the field. Lol. But you still have to pass the entrance exams which include physical.

2nd time, around the same time. I was a member of a Matthew Gray Gubler (Spencer Reid from Criminal Minds) fan blog on Live journal. (Really aging yourself, here, Finley 🤣) Anyway. There was a movie we heard of that MGG would be in but no one knew if it was true or really happening or if the project was still in the works or had been stalled. I did a Google search, found the movies official page, found a contact email or form. I was consise in my subject line and consise in my email (my thinking was entertainment people are gonna be hella busy so put my inquiry in as little but still respectful and professional words as possible. I stated who I was, my experience leading to my question (in this case I said something along the lines of 'my name is Finley Beckett and I'm a member of a Mattew Gray Gubler fan blog. The group of us have been looking forward to the movie that if coming out but we haven't heard anything about it or whether it's still happening or not. I was hoping that you might be able to shine some light on this. Also, due to the questionable relience of the internet these days, would it be at all possible to send some kind of proof that you are indeed the people behind the movie. I won't share with the group, of course, but that way I can with 100% confidence, inform them of your response). And two or so days later I got an email from the director of the movie himself (and keep in mind this was a lower budget film and pretty sure straight to DVD so obviously this would likely not work with someone like say George Lucas or Christopher Nolan or Stephen Spielberg) emailed me back and gave me not only what has been happening as far as movie production but as well as a few production stills that included MGG within them.

I've gotten to correspond with two of my favorite novelists due to finding their websites and through those, their contacts. (Business inquiry emails count as contacts). And one of them, probably my favorite author of all time (Tamora Pierce) even looked over some of my writing at the time and gave me some really great feedback. To this day I cherish this moment even if I've lost the email to time.

Ultimately, the biggest advice I can give on this sort of thing is best summed up in this quote:

"You miss one hundred percent of the shots you don't take. Even though there is only a 1-5% probably of scoring."

— Wayne Gretzky (not Michael Scott 🤣)

And I left in the second part because it confirms what I've said. Like yes, there's only a 1-5% chance of getting something out of reaching out, especially in this day and age.

That said, if you never try, that percentage stays at 0%. Full stop.

You're already at 0%, so it would make more sense if you tried because even if you fail, you're already at 0% so you've literally got nothing to lose, right?

IDK if any of this will help but I wanted to try just the same. (See what I did there? 😉)

[gyaruhana]

Omg can we get some more player 120 (Cho Hyun-ju) sfw n nsfw headcanons where shes protective n dominant? Pls n thank uu I loved ur last work w her🩷

Cho Hyun-ju/Player 120 - Headcannons (sfw + nsfw)

Synopsis: more Hyun-ju headcannons !

A/N: ask and i shall serve !!

Warnings: smut content

SFW:

➠ i'm immediately jumping into the scene in the last episode where she was locked in bc holy moly she was so hot.. ➠ wouldn't let you go with her unless you were well-trained with a gun and able to handle it ➠ even then she's always keeping you close behind her ➠ When she's not shooting at the guards, she's looking at you to make sure you're doing okay ➠ if you run out of ammo, she doesn't hesitate to give you one of her magazines ➠ If you end up panicking she's immediately there to distract you from the gunshots and reassuring you that everything is fine and you'll both be okay ➠ and you both will be because she refuses to die or to let you die ➠ not when you both had already made plans for Thailand after you get out of here ➠ On a lighter note !! ➠ most doting girl ever ➠ does give you some of her food sometimes if you're feeling hungry ➠ If someone insults you, she's instantly at your side to defend you ➠ she HATES people thinking they can treat you badly ➠ do play with her hair she loves it sm ➠ expect her to hold your hand a lot because she's not afraid of PDA ➠ late night talks after lights out which sometimes just turns into staring into each others eyes ➠ so many quiet "I love you"'s whispered during those talks too ➠ likes when you cup her face in your hands honestly ➠ you guys are always talking about WHEN you make it out of this place and never if ➠ so so many plans for Thailand ➠ After the death of Young-mi, she definitely needed your comfort and got so much more protective of you ➠ if you go to the bathrooms, she's right there behind you ➠ you're basically never alone during the games ➠ Absolutely fights for you ➠ Overall, so protective of you and not afraid to put someone in their place if they disrespect you

"I have a few nice places to live in Thailand saved on my phone. I can show you them when we get out," you speak from your bed as you turn to face her. She smiles slightly at your words and nods her head. You both had been planning for Thailand since forever and now the dream seemed so much closer with the money you could take home. Even if some people died, neither of you would be next. Not as long as you were there to protect each other and survive this hellish place together. "I'd like that,"

NSFW:

➠ Again, she's gentle. ➠ not a big fan of having public sex so she often takes you to the bathroom with her if you guys are in the mood ➠ most skillfull pussy eater icl ➠ she knows exactly how to make you feel good ➠ gentle and meaningful kisses that convey so much love ➠ she's just a gentle cutie ➠ always whispering praises to you ➠ baby, my girl, sweetheart - literally every sweet pet name in the book ➠ refuses to be rough with you because she wants to help you relax and be calm from the stress of the games and the death ➠ always kisses you after making you cum on her fingers ➠ which happens quite quickly honestly.. ➠ she's just a little too good at fingering you.. ➠ she's practically memorized every part of you though that's why ➠ encourages volume and expressing how you feel ➠ she bases her pace on your facial expressions because she's ridiculously observant ➠ Overall, gentle girlfriend who knows how to please you<3

"You're close, yeah?" She says quietly as she looks up at you, her fingers continuing to thrust in and out of you quickly. The two of you didn't have a lot of time as the guard waiting just outside the bathroom likely wouldn't let you stay for long. That's why she was so quick with her fingers. The last thing she'd want is for you to be left without a release. "Go ahead. Cum on my fingers, my love,"

[stardust-swan]

What Message Do Moroccan Djinns Have for You?

Pick a picture: 1, 2, 3

This tarot reading is inspired by the Big 3 female djinns (genies) in the Moroccan pantheon. These are general readings. As most people aren't familiar with the Moroccan Pantheon, brief descriptions of each djinn are provided below.

Pile 1: Lalla Aisha 🖤

Lalla Aisha is a djinn who is beautiful, but terrifying. Her story is one often told as a horror story in Morocco. She normally manifests as a beautiful woman in a flowing kaftan - why does her kaftan flow? To hide that her feet are cloven. She can be found lingering near bodies of water after dark, where she may drown men who offend her, or reward those who please her (she may alternatively render a man who displeases her impotent while rewarding ones who please her with supernaturally good sexual prowess). She is a man-eater both literally and figuratively. According to one legend, she is Astarte, reduced to roaming the Earth after her temples were shut; enlisting her own devotees and making her own sacrifices. She can bring madness, miscarriages, illness and death; but she can also bring good health, abundance, fertility and luck. She is simultaneously cruel and benevolent. A woman who is very powerful and demanding; enchanting but unsettling.

What Message Does Lalla Aisha Have for You?

Lalla Aisha is ready to welcome you into her world of beauty and allure, but the path is not without its difficulties.

I get the feeling you're carrying too many burdens. Your own responsibilities and other people's expectations are weighing you down. Aisha Qandisha is a she-demon who does what she wants; like her you need to stop burdening yourself with things that don't serve you. Say no to things that drain you or that simply don't do anything for you.

Something in your life has stagnated. Whether that's a project you're struggling to finish, a relationship that's gone stale (or a sudden breakup or ghosting that left little closure), or finances stagnating as money comes in and then gets immediately spent on bills, you feel stuck. Well, if one thing is true about Lalla Aisha is that she's a go-getter; she will not let anything stop her. If she wants a man she'll make him obsess over her until he's almost mad with thoughts of her. If she wants a particular person to be her devotee she will personally recruit them. If she wants a sacrifice, she has no qualms about doing it herself. Her presence is an indication you need to chop some dead wood and close this chapter.

Although she has a fearsome reputation, she brings great blessings to those who she favours. And you, dear reader, are one of those lucky few. I'm getting a sense that she is bestowing domestic happiness specifically on you. In your future is a household full of abundance, home comforts, and harmony. Reunions and family gatherings will be many. Long-term relationships will be blissful and stable, perfect for bringing children into if you so wish (she also aides with fertility). You will feel content and positive, and those around you will feel your happiness radiating from you.

Advice: Wear black and/or red, take walks in the morning air, wear henna, burn benzoin, go for a swim, eat figs, tie ribbons to trees and make a wish to her (bring an offering to the tree if she fulfils your request).

Pile 2: Lalla Mira 💛

Lalla Mira is a djinn who is associated with fertility, marriage, healing, abundance, and especially love. She also has psychic gifts and is summoned to foretell the future via a spirit medium who she takes possession of. She has been compared to Aphrodite as they preside over similar areas, but unlike Aphrodite she tends to be quite volatile; assertive, aggressive, extremely demanding, and jealous. She engages in relations with human men and if someone she has her eye on is already married... She makes him ask for permission to continue relations with his own wife. However, she is kind to her own devotees (who she may aggressively pursue); healing infertility, finding spouses for them, and preventing illness. Her devotees credit her with their good health, happiness, and the existence of their families. This is a djinn who is incredibly kind to those she favours, but ruinous to those who displease her.

What Message Does Lalla Mira Have for You?

You've been working HARD. Maybe you've just sown the seeds, or maybe those seeds have already grown up into a lush garden. She is telling you that your hard work WILL have results. But she also wants you to let go of perfectionism, because obsessing over small details is making you feel frustrated or stagnated. Make sure you're focusing on the things that bring you joy, instead of fear of failure or the need for every detail to be perfect stealing your happiness. Progress is more important than perfection.

My reading of your future with Lalla Mira was (luckily for you) favourable. She is bringing you happiness, especially in social areas. You will spend time with friends, go on on more dates and get invited to more events. She wants you to have FUN, to connect to your inner child and to embrace what gives you joy, even if it's something you think of as frivolous or juvenile. I feel her encouraging you to experiment with your style - this is a good time to get the drastic haircut you've been wondering about, to update your wardrobe, to experiment with what colours look best on you, etc. Romance is looking good. If you have a secret crush, this is the time to signify you're interested in something more. If you don't have a crush, her presence signals you have a secret admirer. If you're in a relationship, don't be afraid to be romantic and plan dates and quality time - her presence may even foretell an engagement, wedding or pregnancy. Health will be good; and your intuition will become sharper as some of her physic abilities rub off on you.

Advice: Wear orange and/or yellow, dance (especially belly dance or Moroccan folkloric dances), wear henna, take strolls in the afternoon, bathe regularly and be very thorough in your baths (exfoliate when you need to and clean every inch of skin), light candles and incense, spend times around bodies of water like springs, wells and rivers.

Pile 3: Lalla Malika 💜

Lalla Malika is technically a princess as she's the daughter of a King, but her role is that of a Queen. She is a djinn of prosperity, helping her followers gain money, social status, professional success, and success in legal matters. As a very wealthy princess, she's associated with all things considered luxurious - fine perfume, silk kaftans with gold embroidery, gold jewellery, premium incense, beautiful decor, intricate henna (Aisha and Mira also request henna but their designs aren't as detailed or feminine), cosmetics, and delicious chocolates, sweets and pastries. Ritual ceremonies for her look like very lavish engagement parties. Unlike her peers Aisha and Mira, Malika is much gentler despite being just as powerful. If Aisha and Mira set their sights on a man, they will cause him to obsess over them, sometimes to the point of madness, whereas Malika seduces men by chatting to them and calmly stating her desire. When Aisha and Mira want to recruit a devotee, they may make their presence known by attacking or possessing the person, whereas Malika gently reveals herself through dreams, pleasant scents, laughter and tickling. When Aisha and Mira feel wronged they lash out, causing illness, miscarriage, paralysis, or even death, whereas Malika chooses not to attack but withdraws her presence from the situation instead. She is famous for her cheerful spirit, bringing joy and laughter wherever she goes. This is a djinn who is powerful both in status and magical ability, but yet is also soft, joyful, and friendly to all.

What Message Does Lalla Malika Have for You?

There's a sense of mental distress here. Specifically of high stress levels, anxiety or burnout, to the point that you are or will neglect your own needs. Lalla Malika is all about self-care, beautification routines, pleasure and indulgence, so the message here is very clear: you need to indulge yourself! Do what you have to do to make some time for yourself, whether that's dealing out responsibilities you've been burdened with more fairly, working on better time management, asking for help with a task that's overwhelming, etc. And then make sure to treat yourself! Take a long bath or shower complete with a face mask and your most deliciously scented soap and lotion, curl up with a good book or movie and a mug of hot chocolate, partake in your hobbies, or do anything else that brings you joy. Now is the time to pause and recalibrate.

You are in a period of transition, in a positive way - you are overcoming hardship and healing. Your problems will settle down and things will become easier to deal with. There may very well be travel in your future - one of the cards I selected has an association with travel, journeys and vacations, and Lalla Malika herself is associated with travel - she's a flying djinn who often descends from heaven to Earth, and her devotees are often said to be people who travel by airplane.

She is here to make sure you don't neglect your needs, whether emotional or physical. She asks you to consider how you can rest and care for yourself and is welcoming you into her world of abundance and happiness. People who have Malika on their side will flourish in social situations, find they have more money to spend, and will succeed professionally.

Malika's presence is a sure sign you're manifesting luxury and abundance. A life of comfort is coming to you, from every area from fine wine and gourmet chocolates, to good investments and advantages at work. You will cultivate a wide range of skills, hobbies and knowledge that will make you enchant people and make friends easily. You'll also be seen as more beautiful and alluring, both because your confidence will increase and because Malika's dedication to beautification rituals will rub off on you. She wants you to live the high life.

Advice: Wear purple, green or pink, wear perfume, burn incense and purple candles, indulge in sweets, chocolates, and pastries without guilt, dress up nice just because (wear jewellery/makeup if you want too), use creams, oils and lotions regularly, experiment with your style or hair (if you've been wondering about cutting or dying it this is your sign), make sure your wardrobe is organised, learn about business, law or a foreign language/culture, wear intricate henna designs, use your best manners even to people who are rude.

[txrully]

Hi Hi !!! I really love your fics

Can I request a gn reader who loves to manhandle the BL boys (Kinda like aggressive affection).

Thank you, and have a good day :D

CANT ESCAPE MY AFFECTION!

·˚ ༘ ꒱ summary bluelock boys with an s/o who loves aggressive affection

·˚ ༘ ꒱ characters isagi yoichi , bachira meguru , itoshi rin , nagi seishiro , mikage reo , chigiri hyoma , hiori yo , shidou ryusei , itoshi sae , michael kaiser , alexis ness

·˚ ༘ ꒱ warning lowercase intended , gn reader

·˚ ༘ ꒱ a/n idk how - but im pretty sure this flopped :sob: so sorry nonnie :( <3

·˚ ༘ ꒱ isagi yoichi

isagi is kind of taken aback at first, because he’s more used to subtle affection (kinda), but when you pull him into a bear hug and start giving him smothering kisses, he’s so down.

he’s always flustered, trying to return the affection but not quite knowing how to keep up with your energy. when you go in for a kiss, he literally freezes, and you have to drag him in.

"yoichi, c'mere, i don't bite! >:/ "

"w-wait, can’t you, uh, just take it slow- 🥲"

"nope, i'm coming for you whether you like it or not!"

"i... okay? 😅"

·˚ ༘ ꒱ bachira meguru

bachira lives for it. he’s all about that playful, chaotic love. he’ll give you the most dramatic responses and egg you on.

if you get overly affectionate, he’ll tease you by trying to run away and play “catch me if you can,” but then he’ll let you tackle him because he loves the aggressive attention. it’s like his personal sport.

"bachira, i'm not letting you go today!"

"haha, i can totally outrun you! try me!"

"watch me catch you!"

"ah, you did it! but only because i let you."

"you're so annoying, i’m kissing you anyway."

·˚ ༘ ꒱ itoshi rin

to put it simply... rin’s not used to this level of affection ( at all ), but once he realizes you’re serious about it, he melts 🫠. he’ll let you drag him into all the kisses, but he might act like he’s annoyed at first.

he’ll do that thing where he crosses his arms and smirks while you’re all over him, but secretly, he’s a little soft on the inside. once you start kissing his neck or leaning on him aggressively, he’s completely done for.

"ew, stop that."

"i’m literally hugging you wdym. D:"

"do it again."

"i- fine by me."

·˚ ༘ ꒱ nagi seishiro

nagi is lwk confused at first ( :x face and all ), but when you pounce on him and wrap your arms around his neck, he just goes with the flow. he’s so relaxed and chill about the whole thing, and honestly? he really likes being adored.

he might just let you do all the aggressive cuddling, because it’s easier than fighting you. if you push for more, he’ll pretend to be a little annoyed, but in reality, he’s soaking up every moment.

"sei, you’re stuck with me today, deal with it."

"can i, like, not deal with it?"

"nope, too bad."

"…fine. i’ll just enjoy the cuddles."

·˚ ༘ ꒱ mikage reo

reo is the most dramatic when it comes to aggressive affection, but he’s secretly obsessed with it. if you hug him from behind and cover his face in kisses, he’s all “oh no, how will i survive?” but he loves it.

he might complain, but he’s always the first to pull you closer and make sure you’re comfortable. even if he’s acting all sophisticated, he’s a softie for your wild love.

"reo, i’m not done yet!"

"oh nooo, i’m going to be suffocated by love!"

"you’re so dramatic."

·˚ ༘ ꒱ chigiri hyoma

chigiri is a bit flustered at first because he’s not sure how to handle all your aggressive affection, but he’ll warm up to it. he loves being loved—he just needs a moment to process.

if you’re all over him, he’ll take it in stride. he’ll laugh it off and act cool, but you can totally tell he’s enjoying it. maybe he gets a little shy when you shower him with kisses, but he definitely melts into your arms when you do.

"chigiri, you’re not getting away today!"

"what do you mean? i’m always getting away!"

"not today, my love."

"you’re a menace." ( lovingly )

·˚ ༘ ꒱ hiori yo

hiori is soft about it. like- he doesn’t even try to escape. you could probably lift him off the ground with a hug, and he’d just be like “okay, this is happening.”

he loves the attention, and he’s so gentle back, giving you the same level of affection in return. he might blush a bit, but he’s more than happy to let you shower him with attention.

"yo, hiori, you're stuck with me."

"uh-huh, i’m fine with that."

"you’re so cute when you get all shy."

"you’re the cute one here."

·˚ ༘ ꒱ shidou ryusei

shidou absolutely thrives in this environment. he loves being manhandled, basically. if you aggressively kiss his neck or give him a bear hug, he’s probably gonna pretend to act like he’s annoyed, but secretly? he’s loving it.

he might challenge you, though. like, “you think you can take me on?” but deep down, he’s ready to be held, kissed, and adored however you want.

"i’m gonna keep kissing you until you can’t breathe."

"oh? bring it on, i’ll kiss you back harder."

"you’re such a brat."

·˚ ༘ ꒱ itoshi sae

sae acts as cool as ever, but when you pull him into a tight hug and kiss him aggressively, he’s completely unbothered. he won’t show it, but you can tell he really likes it.

he might keep his face neutral, but his hands are definitely moving to pull you in closer, and he’ll even wrap his arm around you to make sure you stay put. he won’t say it, but he’s so happy to be adored by you.

"you’re clingy today .. more than usual."

"you bet i am. deal with it."

"oh well."

·˚ ༘ ꒱ michael kaiser

kaiser is such a dramatic baby. he acts like he’s too important for aggressive affection, but the second you throw yourself at him, he’s all “yes, this is exactly what i wanted.”

he makes a big show of rolling his eyes, but you know he’s loving every second of it. he even tries to one-up you sometimes, like, “you think you’re the only one who can be aggressive with love?” and then he’ll pin you down in return.

"i’m gonna smother you with kisses, just you wait."

"pfft, i dare you."

"watch me."

·˚ ༘ ꒱ alexis ness

ness might seem shy about your affection at first, but he’s totally into it. he doesn’t push you away, but he might give you the sweetest smile when you throw yourself at him.

he’ll pull you in and let you cuddle him as much as you want, and when you kiss him all over his face, he’ll blush like crazy but still hold you tight.

"ness, stop looking so cute while i’m trying to kiss you."

"i can’t help it… :') "

"you’re gonna be the death of me."

© txrully

do not copy/translate/repost/plagiarize my works in any way.

ⁱᵈᵏ ʷʰʸʸʸʸ ᵇᵘᵗ ⁱ ʰᵃᵗᵉ ᵗʰⁱˢ ˢᵐ 🫠

[archangeldyke-all]

hope you're feeling better by the ghosting! Lesbian dating scene is hard out here 😭 have an ask if you're up for it. Or you can just listen abt this scenario I have, totally fine either way just wanna let these thoughts out. And you're my fav sevika writer so! It's a bit angsty/comfort ig? Basically Sevika explaining to reader why it's such a struggle to say "I love you".

Not just because it's an admission of feelings for such a character but I think it's also cuz loving someone also means you have to accept anything could happen to either of them, esp since Zaun and her job are quite dangerous. So saying those 3 words feels like accepting that risk and continue on which is a big thing to do, it's like willingly leaving yourself open to potential heartaches. Idk just recently saw posts about how love is not just a feeling but also a choice, whether to stay/commit/any other reason the person feels what love is. Felt like if the reader is the first thing she's ever cared about and don't wanna lose her (whether it's a breakup, death etc,), she would struggle saying it cuz it feels like accepting that risk which she doesn't want to. She would still make up for it by showing her love & appreciation thru other means tho! Mb the reader had anxious thoughts on whether she reciprocated, or Sevika feels bad for not saying back for so long that she felt like she has to explain why she's struggling.

Sorry if I'm rambling too long 😅 hope you have a great year ahead, love your writing as well! ❤️

i love this sm <33

men and minors dni

even though you've lived in zaun your whole life, you understand that your life's been a lot softer than it could've been.

you've never had to worry about where you'll sleep at night-- you've always had a dry, warm bed to rest in.

you've gone hungry some nights, but you're lucky enough to have never gone more than a few days without a warm meal.

and your choice in career keeps you out of the line of danger; safe and inside most of the day, home before sunset each night.

so, while you're zaunite enough to know how to keep your head down and mind your own business, you understand that for most people life's a lot scarier.

sevika's one of those people.

sevika's known grief for almost as long as she's known how to talk. she's spent her fair share of nights in the cold, and she's gone to bed hungry more often than she's gone to bed full and satisfied. plus, sevika's dedicated her life to being a revolutionary. which means sevika has a lot of enemies.

so it's no surprise that lovey-dovey words come easier for you than they do for sevika.

it isn't until two years into your relationship that you realize she's never said she loves you. sevika has to be the one to point it out.

"i think i gotta call it an early night, baby. you stay up and finish the movie." you say around a yawn, leaning forward to kiss your girlfriend on the couch. sevika pouts.

"just sleep on top of me here." she requests. you snort.

"you'll throw your back out carrying me to bed."

"that's just offensive. i could lift three of you." sevika's pout worsens. "goodnight." she huffs. "give me another kiss."

you laugh and roll your eyes. "i love you." you say with exasperation as you lean in to kiss her. sevika stiffens against you. you pull away to study her face. "'s wrong?"

"you always say that." sevika whispers. you raise an eyebrow at her, climbing into her lap to hold her face between your hands.

"well, yeah. 'cause i do."

"i know." sevika says with a tiny smile. it makes your heart flutter. it's quiet for a moment as you wait patiently for your girl to gather her words. eventually, sevika sighs. "does it ever bother you that i don't say that to you?" she asks.

you frown in confusion. "what, that you love me?" you ask. sevika nods. you sputter a laugh. "yes you do, you say it all the time." you scoff.

sevika blinks up at you in shock. "no i don't." she says. "baby, i've never said it. to anyone. ever."

oh. well, that's surprising. you furrow your brow as you try to recall an instance where your girlfriend let the words slip, and you're shocked to realize that she, in fact, has not. "oh." you say.

sevika gulps. "does that... is that bad?" she asks.

you blink down at her, and your heart shatters. "oh, baby, no." you coo, kissing her frown. "no, that's not bad."

"but-- i should be able--"

"darling, i know you love me." you cut her off. sevika blushes almost as red as she did the first time she saw your tits. you smile, brushing your thumbs over her crimson cheeks. "you make that very clear."

"yeah but i--"

"you moved me into your sacred bachlorette pad three months into us meeting. yesterday, you came home from work with a stab wound, and tried to make me dinner before patching yourself up."

"it was just a scratch."

"i'm not finished. you call me stupid shit like sweetbean and cookie-- and you do it in front of other people! you! sevika; the scary lady of zaun!" she chuckles a little bit at this. "sevika, i didn't even realize you hadn't said it until you told me just now." you kiss her nose. "it's not bad."

sevika leans forward to bury her face against your neck, inhaling deeply. "i just... i want to say it." she whispers. you nod. "i wish i could say it like you do; just, whenever i feel it." god she's romantic. you choke back your own tears as you kiss her scalp. "but... if i say it..." sevika trails off.

"if you say it, it makes it real." you whisper, nodding. "it makes it somethin' you can lose." you can feel her hot tears on your throat. you don't mention it.

"y-yeah." she whispers shakily, her hands clutching at your hips desperately. "and i can't lose you."

"you won't baby. even if the worst happens, i'm yours forever. i'll haunt the shit outta you." this pulls a startled laugh out of her, and you grin. "you don't have to say it for the rest of our lives, if you can't. i won't mind. just as long as we're together."

and that settles it.

for a while...

sevika starts practicing.

she'll spell it out to you, 'i l-o-v-e you, baby.' or she'll whisper it to you when she thinks you're sleeping.

at the three year mark, sevika can say it when she's drunk enough. it's fucking adorable.

"i have somethin' import'nt' t' tell you..." she says with a waggle of her eyebrows. you burst into laughter.

"oh, do you?" you ask.

"mmhmm. look." sevika darts forward to peck your lips, then pulls back with a proud smile. "i love'ya." she slurs. you grin.

"i love you too, baby."

"an' if this jinxes everythin' and y' die-- y' gotta make the haunting obvious 'kay?" she asks. you cackle.

"alright, love."

by the time you're married, the words are almost compulsive for her. sevika can't leave a room without shooting a 'love you' over her shoulder at you. even if you're arguing.

"oh, so you've conveniently got a fuckin' 'meeting' in the middle of the night, on your night to do fuckin' dishes?! if you don't get in the kitchen and grab the sponge right now you're sleeping on the couch!"

"it's six pm, it's a dinner meeting! i'll do the dishes when i get back! you act like i'm fuckin' negligent, but you're the one who doesn't know how to properly clean a fuckin' toilet! janna, you annoy me-- i love you, i'll be back by midnight!" she huffs as she slams the door behind her.

despite how pissed you are-- you can't help but smile a bit at her words.

taglist!

@fyeahnix @lavendersgirl @half-of-a-gay @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner

@kissyslut @chuucanchuucan @badbye666 @femme-historian @lia-winther

@lavenderbabu @emiliabby @sevikasbeloved @hellorai @my-taintedheart

@glass-apothecary @macaroni676 @artinvain @k3n-dyll @sevsdollette

@ellieslob @xayn-xd @keikuahh @maneskinwh0re @raphaellearp

@iamastar @sevikitty @mascdom @nhaaauyen @annesunshiner

@mirconreadzztuff22 @veoomvroom @lushh-s3vik4s @katyawooga @lesbodietcoke

@strawberrykidneystone @sevikasfan @fict1onallyobsessed @dvrkhcld @sweetybuzz25

@sluttysierraaa @snake-in-a-flower-crown @ruiwonderz @littlemisszaunite @biblicalcrybaby

@blackgaladriel @nightlyconfusion @dancingqu33n17

[the-modern-typewriter]

Hiii! Could you please write some hurt comfort hero and villain? Where it has a “who did this to you” vibes! Thanks! No pressure if you don’t want to!

"You look..." The villain's gaze travelled slowly up the hero, taking in the hard lines of them, the uncanny iciness that had replaced a once warm, familiar face. "Different."

"And you look like hell. Let's get you out of here."

Despite the fact that the hero had just blown the villain's chains to smithereens, the villain didn't move. They leaned heavily against the cold concrete wall of their cell, still staring.

The hero's fingers flexed agitated at their sides.

"I can - if you're hurt, I can help you stand. I don't - you're safe now."

It was like an act they didn't know how to play any more. The script was the same, but the tongue behind the words was a sharper thing. A whittled thing. Made hard and venomous with desperation. Like the world had taken an axe to everything that made the hero them and started hacking.

"Who did this to you?" the villain demanded.

"What?"

"You're all..." Their head lolled, as they tried to tilt it customarily to one side. Their broken fingers hurt too much to wiggle them effectively in the hero's direction, but they did their best. "Not you. All..."

"They hurt you," the hero said. Flat. Deadly.

The villain wet their cracked, swollen lips. Their voice came out raspy. "I heard screaming."

"Yeah." Something dark and protective simmered in the hero's eyes. It looked awfully a lot like 'they deserved it'. Like how the villain's eyes used to look, through a mirror darkly, until the pain scorched through everything cold and steely inside them.

"You killed people. You killed...you came for me."

"We need to go," the hero said, through gritted teeth. "We need to get you out of here. Come on." The hero ducked down, only to falter when their gruff tug immediately made the villain's whole world go fuzzy with hurting. The touch turned gentle as the villain flinched. The hero's hands floundered, like they no longer knew the language of caring, but still remembered that they wanted to try.

A stupid prickle of tears stung the villain's eyes.

"Who did this to you? Who-"

"-Please," the hero said. "Put your arms around me. You need to work with me here. Please."

The villain wrapped their aching arms around the hero's shoulders. The hero lifted them up, holding them oh so carefully. Being upright was still enough to make the villain's vision pop and then blacken.

When they regained consciousness, they were walking through a slaughter house. Blood everywhere. As if a hurricane given teeth and claws had ripped through the building.

"Did I do this?" the villain asked.

"No, love."

But that wasn't quite right.

"No, I mean - I was gone," the villain said. Their head felt so fuzzy with everything they had been given, but the sharp edges of the hero were so clear, if only they could find the words to paint the picture half as well, let the knowledge swirling inside them settle. "You were on your own. How long have you been trying to rescue me?"

"It's going to be alright, okay? I've got you. You're alright."

"Are you?"

"I'm not the one who's been tortured!" It came out a snap, and maybe the villain should have flinched after an eternity of raised voices and raised weapons, but they didn't.

"You don't do so well on your own," the villain said instead, softly. "You never have."

The hero's throat bobbed as they swallowed, convulsive, choking something down. "Don't."

The villain raised a hand, rubbing their thumb over the gaunt line of the hero's face.

The hero flinched back.

"It's going to be alright," the villain said. "You're going to be alright. I've got you."

"You -" The hero laughed then, a broken thing. They jerked their head to the side but it didn't hide the tears glinting in their eyes. "Maybe let's not focus on me right now. You were - what they did to you - they told that they - I should have got here faster."

"I'm sorry they used me against you."

"Don't."

"Tell me their names?"

"They're all dead."

"Tell me anyway."

"I killed them."

"I know, love. Tell me anyway."

The hero swore, but the villain could practically watch some life creep back into those icy eyes. Some horror. Some thing that wasn't a stranger. Their hero. The hero held them a little tighter, cradling them a little closer against their chest.

"Just - later. Let me get you help. You need help."

Well, the villain couldn't argue with that. Still. Their own body didn't feel half as perturbing as the way the hero's eyes iced over again, determined to see through the job, to not shatter no matter what they'd done to get to where they were. To get the villain back. To save them.

They tucked themselves closer to the hero's chest, to their heart - thumping proof of life, proof of hope, proof that maybe they hadn't entirely lost the thing they cared about most of all.

Who did this to you?

But the villain didn't really need to ask.

The answer was always their own name.

[princecharmingwinks]

Sterek Fic Rec - 2024

Guess who's backkkkk??? Ok so I know that I am late but only by like 4 days? So not too bad. Anyway! Welcome to Prince's 2024 Fic Rec List! I am now aiming to do a list every year (and more if we are lucky but let's not promise that hehe). As always here are my top 10 fics I read and a special bonus mention !

Perfect Star That Hid by thebigoblin (1/1 | 1K | Teen)

He turns his hand— It’s not bare, anymore. His wrist — it has a name. His soulmate’s name. He stares. And stares and stares because what the hell. This has to be a joke, right?

Last Christmas (I gave you my heart) by jadore_hale (1/1 | 4K | Teen)

“W-what is this?” Derek couldn’t even begin to get his mind around this current situation. “My Christmas gift to you, nephew.” Peter pushed the guy towards him, and Derek hastened to catch him before he fell face first on the floor. “I’d like you to meet your soul mate.” *** Derek's uncle Peter decides to get a little more creative this Christmas by finding Derek's soulmate and stuffing him in a box with a pretty bow on top.

Stiles Stilinski, Magical PI by suzvoy (1/1 | 21K | Mature)

Stiles is a Private Investigator, only not really. He's also magical, but only close up. One thing he's really good at is lusting over people from afar, which is why it's a problem when Laura Hale hires him to help her brother.

Wanted and Wounded by RoxyRosee (3/3 | 12K | Explicit)

Derek can't seem to get off. It's been days with no luck, and he's constantly on edge. But then pack night rolls around, and when Stiles falls into him as he goes to sit down on the couch, Derek is suddenly coming, right where he sits. Turns out, Stiles is his mate. And among a whole slew of embarrassing side effects to this whole "mate" thing is the fact that Derek will never again be able to have an orgasm without Stiles by his side. So yeah, Derek's life kind of sucks right now.

Welcome to the Jingle by Jmeelee (1/1 | 1K | Mature)

Derek could admit—only to himself, of course, never out loud—that he was a little desperate to make new holiday traditions with his (officially all adults now thank god) pack. But his ideas had run more along the lines of a cozy take-out dinner at his new apartment, an ugly sweater or white elephant party, or maybe volunteering at the local soup kitchen. It had not involved spending Christmas Eve at Jungle.

Hey Dad, Derek Hale Is In My Room. Bring Your Gun. by fairytalesandfolklore (1/1 | 767 | Teen)

Being the Sheriff's kid is hard enough. Having a seemingly over-protective father who's more concerned about your bad influence than your ex-murder-suspect werewolf boyfriend is so much worse.

"The point is, I'm an adult," he amends, heaving a weary sigh as he attempts to salvage whatever is left of his dignity. "I can make my own decisions, and I choose Derek. He makes me happy. He's a good guy. He treats me well. He looks out for me, keeps me safe. He's responsible and respectful and a complete gentleman, and I really think that if you just got to know him a little better, you'd really—" The Sheriff holds up a hand, effectively cutting Stiles off mid-ramble. "I like Derek just fine," he says, and the smile that spreads across his face is warm and genuine. "You do?" Stiles falters, completely thrown. "Wait, so then why—" The Sheriff's fond smile turns to one of wry amusement. "It's you I don't trust, Stiles," he says around a hearty chuckle. "I've raised you for 18 years, I know exactly what kind of mischief you're capable of. Wouldn't want you dragging that nice, respectable boy into any trouble."

The Hoodie by PersePhonesDreams (1/1 | 1K | General)

Stiles didn’t mean to keep Derek’s hoodie—really, he didn’t. But the oversized, ridiculously soft thing quickly became his favorite comfort item, a piece of Derek he couldn’t quite let go of. It’s not like Derek would notice anyway... right? When Derek unexpectedly shows up at Stiles’ window one quiet night, Stiles’ not-so-secret attachment to the hoodie is exposed, leading to a conversation that changes everything. Cue awkward confessions, teasing smiles, and the realization that maybe Derek doesn’t mind Stiles keeping more than just his hoodie.

Over the Hedge(witch) by rororowyourboat (1/1 | 7K | Teen)

Derek moves into a new house with Laura and he is flustered by the hot gardener next door who is always just slightly dirty.

And When I Wake You're There I'm Saved by suchfun (1/1 | 14K | Teen)

"Derek," Stiles says, firm. His hand is warm on Derek's shoulder. "I'll be okay." "You didn't leave me," Derek argues. "How can you expect me to leave you?" Stiles rolls his eyes. "Oh my god, it'll be fine. Even if I am captured, I'm just a boring human. They wanted you for your Lycan blood." Derek crosses his arms. Mainly so he doesn't wrap his hands around Stiles' throat in an attempt to throttle some sense into him. "That's fine. But this isn't a time when being a boring human is an asset. This is a time when being a boring human results in a shot to the head." "Derek," Stiles says again. He steps closer, so Derek is surrounded in his scent, his chemosignals—namely unwavering, resolute determination, distinctively sharp and entirely unbreakable—clouding Derek's mind. "You'll come back for me." He sounds so sure, and he can tell the exact moment Derek gives in. Because Derek somehow always gives in to Stiles. "I'll come back for you," he confirms. "And you better not be dead." Stiles grins, eyes sparkling with far too much humour for someone who potentially just sacrificed himself for a surly Lycan and bunch of strangers. "You do say the sweetest things."

Remember What's Lost by AMatchInWater (1/1 | 7K | Explicit)

Wild Hunt AU, Stiles gets taken and Derek instantly knows something is wrong with his memory, but just doesn't know what until Lydia calls him, begging for his help to get Stiles back because she thinks they have the strongest connection. When Derek saves Stiles he stops at nothing to finally get what's his.

princecharmingwinks special mention (this fic has a heck of a lot of emotions and when Derek fell to his knees, my heart broke. you gotta read it to find out why! don't worry I will never read or rec unhappy endings)

Horizons into Battlegrounds by AClosedFicIsNeverRead (1/1 | 15K | Explicit)

Derek has always kept his distance from Stiles, refusing to act on his instinctive desire for the pale, doe-eyed human. But at what cost? When circumstances reveal the horrors that Stiles has suffered due to Derek's self-imposed distance, will the Alpha be able to make it right before it's too late? ______________________________________________________ “Who are you to the pack?” the hunter asked. “I’m nobody.” Stiles answered plainly. And a harsh chill ran through Derek’s body. His breath caught in his throat because… because Stiles’ heart… it had remained steady. Stiles… actually believed that. Believed that he was ‘nobody.’ How could Stiles believe that?

That is all for 2024 my friends! Please remember to give kudos and leave comments for all our amazing Sterek writers. I know I'd be lost without you all. Thank you!

[enderlovez]

out on the couch

Spencer Reid x Reader WORD COUNT: 1300+

Summary: You and Spencer have an argument, and in the heat of the moment, he says something pretty hurtful.

Content Warning: arguments, it's winter and cold, hurtful words, guilt

────── ꒰ঌ·✦·໒꒱ ──────

The argument starts over something stupid. It always does—not to say you fight with Spencer frequently, but when you do, it's always over something ridiculous.

Maybe it's the way he corrected you on something small—some minor detail that really didn't matter in the grand scheme of things. Or maybe it's the way you left your coffee mug on the counter instead of rinsing it out immediately.

You don't even remember the specifics. All you know is that it escalated fast, the frustration mounting between you like a growing storm.

"I don't understand why everything has to be a debate with you!" you snap, throwing your hands up in exasperation.

Spencer's jaw tightens, his lips pressing into a thin line. "I'm not debating you. I'm just pointing out that—"

"That I'm wrong?" you interrupt, your voice sharper than you intended it to be.

"No, I—" He cuts himself off, dragging a hand through his hair, his frustration palpable. "You're twisting my words again, Y/N. You always do this."

That does it. His tone is clipped, dismissive, and it slices through you like a hot knife. Your chest tightens to the point of pain as you glare at him, trying to hold back the sting of tears.

"Right," you say bitterly, your voice trembling. "I'm impossible to deal with, aren't I? That's what you're thinking."

It's cruel of you to say. Even in the moment, you know it's wrong. Spencer's eyes flash with irritation, and before you can take back the words, he says the one thing he shouldn't.

"You said it, not me."

The room goes quiet.

It's not the loud kind of quiet (you know), where tension hangs thick and heavy. It's the hollow kind (you know that, too), the kind that presses against your chest and makes it hard to breathe.

You stare at him, your lips parted in shock, but no words come out. He doesn't seem to notice—or maybe he does, but he's too stubborn to back down.

Instead, he turns on his heel and storms off, his long legs carrying him into the bedroom. The door shuts behind him, not quite slamming but still loud enough to echo in your ears.

You stand there for a long moment, staring at the empty space where he stood. The weight of his words lingers, heavier than the argument itself. You swallow hard, the ache in your chest growing as the tears you'd been holding back finally spill down your cheeks.

But you don't follow him.

Instead, you grab the old throw blanket draped over the back of the couch and curl up on the sofa. It's not comfortable—the cushions are firm, the blanket thin, and the chills of winter seeps into your bones—but you can't bring yourself to go into the bedroom.

────── ꒰ঌ·✦·໒꒱ ──────

In the bedroom, Spencer sits on the edge of the bed, his head in his hands.

The anger that had burned so hot just moments ago is gone entirely, snuffed out like a candle. What's left is the cold weight of regret, pressing down on him like a lead blanket.

He knows he shouldn't have said what he did. He knows it was cruel, unnecessary, and completely unfair—especially when he could see the beginning of an apology on your face.

But at the time, it had felt like the only way to defend himself.

Now, with the argument over and the silence settling in, all he can think about is the look on your face when he said those words. The way your shoulders sagged as if weighed down, the way your eyes widened just slightly, as if he'd struck you.

The thought makes him feel a little nauseous.

He waits for you to come to bed, his heart sinking further with each passing minute. The silence stretches on, broken only by the faint hum of the heater kicking on in the corner.

You don't come.

Maybe at some point in his life, he'd have been grateful for the quiet. But now that he's spent almost every day with you when he's not working, listened to your quiet ramblings, it feels more suffocating than comforting.

You're comforting.

Finally, he gets up and steps into the hallway. The dimmed light from the living room spills into the darkness, and he follows it, an unfamiliar discomfort swirling around his stomach.

When he sees your curled up on the couch, trembling slightly, his chest tightens painfully.

You're lying on your side as to stay on the narrow sofa, your knees tucked up to your chest, the thin throw blanket doing nothing to shield you from the cold. He can see the way your shoulders are hunched, the way your body is curled in on itself, as if trying to make yourself small.

The sight breaks his heart.

"Y/N," he says softly, his voice barely above a whisper.

You stir, blinking groggily as your eyes flutter open. For a moment, you just stare at him, the hurt in your gaze twisting the knife of guilt in his chest.

"What're you doing out here?" he asks, kneeling beside the couch.

You shift slightly, your voice quiet and trembling when you finally speak. "I figured you wouldn't want me in the room."

The words hit him like a punch to the gut.

There is nothing on Earth that could make him not want you around, not even a silly argument. Nothing that could convince him to keep you at arms length for more than a few minutes.

His breath catches, and he reaches out, his fingers brushing lightly against your arm. You don't flinch, but you don't lean into his touch like you usually would, either. The hesitation in your posture is enough to make his broken heart ache.

"Y/N," he murmurs, his voice thick with regret. "That's not true. I didn't mean what I said. I was angry, and I wasn't thinking. I... I never should have said that, I promise you're not impossible to deal with."

You don't respond, your gaze dropping to the blanket. He lets out a shaky breath, his fingers curling into his palms as he tries to find the right words. His hands somehow find your face, thumbs wiping away the dampness still there.

"I'm sorry," he continues. "I was wrong. I hurt you, and I hate that I did. You're not impossible. You're—God, you're everything to me..."

For a long moment, you don't say anything.

Finally, you sigh, your voice barely audible. "It d-didn't feel like that earlier."

Spencer's shoulders slump, his head bowing as shame washes over him. "I know," he whispers. "I was awful to you. I don't have an excuse, but I... I can't stand the thought of you feeling like I don't want you around. Because I do. Always."

You look at him then, your eyes glassy with unshed tears. "It's hard to believe that when you say things like that, Spence."

"I know," he says again, his voice breaking. "But I'll spend every moment for the rest of my life making it up to you, if I have to. If you want me to."

Your lips press together, and for a moment, he thinks you're going to push him away. But then you shift, sitting up slowly and letting the blanket fall away from your body. You lean into him slightly, nose pressing against the top of his head.

"Come here," he says softly, holding his hand toward yours.

You hesitate, but eventually, you take it. He pulls you into his arms, wrapping you in his embrace as if he's afraid to let you go. The warmth of his body seeps into yours, chasing away the lingering chill.

"I'm sorry," he whispers again, his lips brushing against your hair. "I'll do better, I promise."

You rest your head against his shoulder, the tension in your body slowly melting away. "Please... just don't make me feel like that again."

"I won't," he vows, holding you tighter.

He'll never let you feel like this again—like you're less than enough. Like you're not everything and more to him. Like he doesn't want you around. Like he doesn't love you. Never.

And as he carries you back to the bedroom, his arms never leaving your frame, you let yourself believe him.

[ssweeterthanfiction]

waiiiiit need a fic where reader finds out finnick told snow he’d take on more clients to ensure she’s safe

YOU ASK AND YOU SHALL RECIEVE!!

Innocent

HEAVY content warnings: trafficking of victors, panic attack, self hatred, suidcidal thoughts.

It was late. Finnick had just gotten home from a long trip. He was gone for nearly a month. A month away from you felt like years. A month away from your smile, a month away from your laughter, a month away from your warm touch.

Tiredly, he walks into the living room of your shared home, flicking on a lamp so he could see better.

He was exhausted.

For the past few weeks it had been nonstop. A new person every single night. At times he would think, if he should even keep up with all of it. But then he remembered why he was doing this, to keep you shielded from the truth, to keep you protected.

"If you want her to remain untouched, you take on the responsibility of the people that would've wanted her."

He passes by a mirror and sees his reflection. He sees the scratches and bruises left by his 'lovers'. He stares at them for a moment, wanting to just rip the skin off of his body instead of just covering them up and playing it off as injuries that he would get from fishing and swimming, maybe then he won't feel dirty and used.

He plops onto the couch, his entire body aching. He puts his head in his hands, thinking that he should end his misery already.

He scolds himself for this.

Finnick hated that he had such thoughts of quiting everything, he hates himself for wanting to give up, he hates feeling dirty, he hates feeling used, he hates himself for allowing Snow to make him bend at his will.

He couldn't handle it anymore. He couldn't handle being treated like a toy. He just wanted it all to end.

But if he truly ended it all, he would be leaving you. He would be leaving you to the hands of the Capitol.

And how they wanted to get their hands on you.

He felt tears well up in his eyes, he felt his hands begin to shake, he felt his heart race.

Then he heard quiet footsteps.

"Finn? Is that you?"

He turns his head and sees you in one of his shirts and your pajama bottoms.

"Yea it's me angel"

You rub your eyes and slowly walk toward the couch. "What time is it?"

"Late." Finnick says, trying to hold back his tears.

You sit down next to him, even though you're half asleep you notice that he's trembling. You move close to him and put a hand on his shoulder.

"Finnick?...Are you alright?" you say in a gentle tone.

Feeling your warm touch, Finnick breaks down.

You wrap your arms around him, "Finn? Finn what's wrong?" you say as you stroke his hair, trying your best to comfort him.

"I-I'm so sorry angel. I'm so sorry" he says through tears.

You look at him with confusion, "You're sorry for what Finn?"

"For everything. I'm so sorry, I can't do it anymore angel...I can't. I'm so tired." he says as he begins to hyperventilate.

You feel alarms going off inside your head. "Finn. Finnick please talk to me. Please." you say in a soothing tone as you cup his face in your hands.

"I can't keep doing this...I can’t keep pretending, keep smiling for them, keep letting them—" his voice breaks, his breath becomes more uneven.

"Finnick who are you talking about?"

"S-Snow- the entire Capitol-" he says, trembling as he practically sobs in your hands, shaking his head.

You press your lips to his forehead, resting yours against his when you pull away, "Finny...please talk to me,

He sniffles, "They own me. Snow… he owns me."

"Own you? What are you talking about Finny?"

He bites his lip, is he really about to tell you the whole truth?

"He… he sells me. To his friends. To anyone with enough money or influence. And if I say no, if I fight back, he threatens… everyone I care about."

You can feel a pit form in your stomach, you pull him into a tight hug, letting him cry in your arms. "Finny..." you whisper, stroking his hair, "How long has this been going on?"

"S-Since I was sixteen, and they parade me around like I was some prize, some… toy. That's why I take so many trips to the Capitol. That's why I act the way I act. I play the role because- because I thought it meant keeping everyone I cared about safe. But I can’t stop it. I can’t stop him."

"And the worst part? They love it. The Capitol loves it. They think I’m... happy. That I want this." he says, his tears wetting the fabric of your shirt. "But it’s never enough. Snow always wants more."

You tighten your embrace, letting him cry it all out.

"He threatened you, angel. He wanted to do this same thing to you. I couldn’t let that happen. He would’ve taken you, used you, broken you. And I couldn’t live with that. I couldn’t let him touch you. So I made a deal. I told him I’d take on more, do whatever he wanted, as long as he left you alone. That's why my trips have been so much longer."

Your heart shatters. You can feel tears begin to well in your eyes, you don't even know what to say. He's been dealing with so much. Alone. Just to keep you protected. "Oh..Finny" you say shakily, pressing gentle kisses to his forehead.

"I hate him. I hate myself for letting him control me. But I couldn’t stand the thought of you s-suffering . I’d do it again if it meant keeping you safe."

You pull away from him slightly, making just enough space so you can press your lips against his.

"I did it to protect you angel. I lovd you too much to- to let you go through that. I couldn't let you go through any of that, you don't deserve to."

You kiss him again, "I know Finny. I know." you say in a gentle tone, kissing his forehead. "And I love you for that. I love you so much Finny."

You pull him into a tight embrace again, letting his get all his bottled up emotions out.

"I'm sorry for keeping this from you angel."

"It's not your fault Finny.." you whisper. "None of it is. It's Snow. Not you."

For the next few hours, you cuddle with Finnick on the couch. Running your fingers through his hair til you both fall asleep in eachother's embrace.

A/N: MY SHAYLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAA☹️💔

[motthe]

I'm back with more Viktor luman au angst, but this time with mage Viktor:

On the day before the final battle, Reader is in the lab helping make some of the wepons for the final battle. Jayce leaves to deliver the last of them to the enforcers, but not before giving Reader reassurance that everything was going to be okay. Then he leaves, closing the door behind him. Reader whose overwhelmed knowing that Viktor nearly killed their friends and is going to do something awful. No one knows what he's planning, but he did send a robot to attack Mel and Jayce. As she sits there with her hand covering her face, she hears a creek. She thinks it's just Jayce back from delivering the wepons. She calls out to him, but no one answers back. Looking up, one of the robots is standing right in front of her. It's a blank white metallic face reflecting her shocked expression. This is bad she's all alone in the academy. Everyone evacuated to the other buildings in anticipation of a fight. So that means no one is around to hear her scream for help.

Before she can fully react, it lunges at her. She quickly grabs a nearby wrench and smacks the robot away. She goes to hit it again, but from behind her, another robot takes her wepon from behind. Now defenseless, she goes to run, but the robots are faster they grab her by her arms and hold her down on a table. Reader struggles and fights, but she's no fighter she's a doctor. All she can do is struggle and hope to somehow get away. It's all in vein though, as they bring her arms over her head, all she can do is kick her legs uselessly.

"Don't be scared, my love." Rings out a voice reader knows very well. It's followed by something small bumping into her face and nuzzling it. She looks over to see Viktors lumen nuzzling her. She hadn't seen the little guy in a while. Viktor took him when he left for Zaun. The little guy was different, no longer a dim yellow he now glowed blue much like the hexcore with black veins inside of him. It would be comforting if she wasn't currently being restrained. "I won't hurt you, I'd never hurt you."

"Why should I beli-" Turning towards where the voice came from, she loses her voice when she finally gets a look at what he's become. A tall, imposing figure steps from the darkness in all his glory. He has a beauty to him but also gives her a sense of dread she can't quite place. Maybe it has to do with the robots holding her down or the glowing eyes that seem to analyze her. Viktor walks closer, his cane turned staff clicking as it hits the floor. Once he's close enough, he holds out a hand about to touch her face.

Snaping out of her trance, she kicks out her leg, attempting to kick him away. Only for him to grab it with the hand that hovered over her face moments ago. He holds it down while the follower, still holding down her arm, uses its free hand to hold down her other leg. Now completely immobile, she feels tears well up in her eyes as she starts to beg. "Viktor, please, this isn't you don't do this." She doesn't quite know what she's begging him not to do, but she has a feeling these white robots weren't built in a lab. Considering Viktors new look, she has a hunch these robots were once - she just can't think of it. "You dont need to be afraid, my love. You will understand everything if you just join me."

She watches as Viktor releases his staff, and it floats beside him as he goes to rub her lumen. It's curled up under his neck, shivering in fear but still trying to find comfort in him. She shivers from the touch before shaking her head. "No, I don't know what's happened to you, but you need to stop this madness. You can end this and we can go home together please." She pleads but it falls on deaf ears as Viktor's hand leaves her lumen. He reaches out to her face again. "I was hoping I wouldn't have to force you, but no matter, you will join me either way." With that, he touches her forehead. She gasps as she feels suddenly so light and warm. At the same time, everything begins to erase. All her thoughts and memories are scrubbed from her mind, but with her last bit of clarity, she calls out to Viktor, "I love you Viktor, I will always lo-" She doesn't finish as her lumen falls off Viktors shoulder and absorbs into her new body.

Jayce gasps after seeing the vision given to him by the mage. Who he now knows is Viktor he questions why he gave him the rune and that vision. The mage is quiet as he walks from the still white body of the doomed timeline Jayce. He goes over to the standing statue of a woman. Despite being turned like the others, she still looks human. Her face isn't blank but has all her facial features. Her body is still that eerie marble with gold flecks, but unlike the others, she has no traces of corruption. She's draped in the blue blanket with a very small blue lumen huddled under her head. The mage caresses her face before kissing her lips that will never kiss back. As he does, Jayce hears a whisper he almost thought was the wind. A faint I love you is heard before mage Viktor pulls away looking to Jayce he smiles but it doesn't reach his eyes "Cause in all timelines all possibilities only you can show me this."

Okay, so I hope no one was confused, but in the og/doomed timeline, mel still becomes a mage, but the difference is no mage Viktor, so doomed Jayce has no idea what Viktor is planning. Also that's why instead of evacuating out of the city, they relocated civilians to safe houses. This is to explain why there's so many robots in the doomed timeline. As for how he evolved in the doom timeline, honestly, it was probably singed who helped him evolve to his final form. Then mage Viktor shows Jayce how he turned the reader further, giving his alternate self a reason not to go through with his plan. Also, mage Viktor knows that out of everyone, Jayce is the only one who can get close enough to Viktor to stop him. So Jayce goes back and convinces the reader to leave with the other civilians. The final battle goes as planned, but now Viktor sees what mage Viktor did in doomed timeline to his soulmate, and the ending happens. But after Jayce and Viktor get sucked into the arcane, all that's left behind is readers' lumen who travels back to the reader once the civilians return.

sad hours at work 😭 but for real this was beautifully written. love how much thought went into this!!!

[wanderingwolfwitcher]

"Mmm. Glad to hear it... and nothing that can't be remedied soon enough, I'm sure. The waiting only makes it better when it happens... and we certainly have had to wait for awhile."

Eskel's low, amused voice murmured back to Rhaena, a pleased smirk touching his marred visage as well. Though they hadn't been together and around one another for long in the past, they quickly seemed to fall back into the old, comfortable feeling they had shared, as well as the flirtation, ever welcome. Though he was more than used to walking the Path with only his horse to accompany him, he had certainly missed her presence in more ways than one. Looked forward to reuniting properly, when the opportune time for it came to them. Not to mention seeing the effects of her magical transformation, beneath the gown. At the dark haired, beautiful woman's welcome touch, which didn't seem to elicit the effect of visions that it had the last time they were together, and words of observation, the Witcher looked back to the nearby, the equally alluring red haired Triss who was watching them as well with a smile, before looking back to the crimson clad Sorceress in front of him again with a nod, deep tone returning to her once more. It would be welcome to have the two of them around, during their stay in Kovir, though he wasn't quite sure how to approach it. Hopefully they had gotten along... Triss had never been the sort of teacher like Yennefer or Tissia, in his experience, when she had been teaching Ciri at Kaer Morhen. Margarita didn't have a reputation for being a battle-axe either... even if both women had been on the Lodge.

"Triss certainly knows what she's talking about, where magic is concerned. Not surprised she was able to figure it out for you. Couldn't be in better hands at a school like this one. You could probably teach me a few things about magic, now. Certainly wouldn't mind both of you as teachers. Especially compared to the ones I had."

@gcldenlioness

@wanderingwolfwitcher [as discussed]

She clutches the cloak tighter about her frame, drawing the hood up over her head to at least try to keep the snow out of her eyes.

Rhaena had thought she would grow used to the chills that winters on The Continent brought. It had been near four years since she had fled from Westeros, where she had been condemned to a life of poverty in King’s Landing. She’d had no clue where she would end up when she stole away into the belly of a merchant ship, and it would seem that had the crew- she would later learn that their original destination had been Essos, but wild storms had sent them adrift and now here she was.

She’d traversed her way through this strange new world, eventually settling in a small village close to the mountains of Kaedwen. Of course, without a coin to her name, she had had to find work quickly, but the village’s pleasure house had employed her the moment they had laid eyes upon her. It was not something she particularly enjoyed, but it earned her enough to purchase a small homestead on the outskirts of the village.

The storm had set in as she was returning home and quickly, she had lost her bearings in the blizzard. She’d ended up in the forest that circled the village, entirely blind to the true way home. She paused for a moment, dark eyes casting this way and that to look for something familiar. But so thick was the snow that she could scarcely see her hand in front of her face. And she did not see the creature until it had knocked her to the ground, sharp claws pressing into her chest as it pins her down. All she can see now is teeth, growing ever closer as it leans down to take the death bite-

Suddenly, she hears the swing of the sword through the icy air, the thud of the creatures head as it lands close to hers, and feels the warm spray of blood across her face. Eyes remain shut for several moments before she slowly opens them, gaze falling upon the man in the dark red cloak, who stands above her.

Eyes wide with fear, she scrambles to her feet. Beneath the hood, she can make out yellow eyes and a large scar that marrs his face. She’s seen him around the village from time to time- she cannot recall his name, but she knows he is one of the elusive Witchers who spend their winters nearby.

“Th-thank you, Ser…” she says with as much bravery as she can muster, words heavily accented. “Forgive me but…I have no coin for you…”

[gyaruhana]

Can u please write wlw smut for my glorious queen se-mi player 380

Se-mi/Player 380 - hatefucking

Synopsis: You and Se-mi can't stand each other so what better way to deal with that issue then fight for dominance?

A/N: i did combine this with another request for hatesex bc they both were wuh luh wuh so.. hope you don't mind!!

Warnings: smut content, choking, degradation, slight fight for dominance, fingering, it's hatesex..

If there was one thing you avoided, it was arguments. You preferred to avoid making enemies because; what was the point? It was far better to make friends than enemies who’d plot your death on the daily. Friends would be there to make you happy and comfort you when you're sad. Enemies would just laugh at you and pull you further down into the depths of sadness. That's why you always opted for only making friends and allies.

The only exception to this little rule was her. Se-mi.

Se-mi had been getting on your nerves from the moment you had both spared a glance at each other. There was something about her that reeked of over-confidence and judgement. The way she would look at you with that smirk on her face as if she thought she was better than you. It pisses you the fuck off and all you wanted to do was punch her face in so she could never smirk or scoff at you again.

Whether it was for good or bad, Se-mi felt the same way. You were always so nice to everyone, even to those who didn't deserve kindness whatsoever. It pissed her off that you'd try to be friends with everyone. Were you naive or just plain stupid? Whatever it was, she didn't like it. You were so happy-go-lucky as if you weren't trapped in this hell hole where people are being killed left and right. She didn't trust you at all because you seemed like the type who'd willingly stab someone in the back sooner or later.

In short, the feeling of hate was mutual between you two and, everytime you were near each other, there was a silent tension of unspoken dislike. Neither of you had actually communicated your dislike through speech, it was all just glares from across the room and the purposeful avoidance of each other.

Today, you unfortunately didn't have the opportunity to avoid each other like you two usually opted to do.

It was the third game and it was called ‘Mingle’. It wasn't a difficult game as long as you weren't one to crack under the pressure of a short time limit. All you had to do was form a group of whatever number was called out and then run into a room with them. The first four rounds went well for you since you were friends with practically everyone here and could always find a group to join.

When the fifth round came, the number two was called and chaos broke out quite quickly as people realized not everyone will be fortunate enough to get a room. As chaos broke out and lights flashed, you found it rather difficult to see who was on their lonesome and needed a pair. Luckily for you, you managed to spot the tall silhouette of someone who was on their own so you ran towards them and grabbed a hold of their wrist, dragging them into one of the last free rooms. You quickly shut it behind you as you let out a relieved sigh - glad you managed to find someone before it was too late.  

When you turned around, you were met with the unimpressed face of Se-mi. You almost let out a groan of annoyance at the sight of her. Maybe you should go back out there and just get shot. At least then she'd die as well and you could rest peacefully knowing she'd never plague anyone with her ugly personality again. 

“I'm not happy to see you either,” she says as she folds her arms across her chest and leans against the wall behind her. You let out a scoff of annoyance as the doors finally locked indicating the timer was up. Considering you'd probably be trapped in this room for a while until they clear out the bodies, maybe now would be a good time to confront her about her behavior.

“What's your problem? You're always such an asshole to me,” you say as you step closer to her. Your words may have been slightly aggressive but you couldn't help it when she was around. She just naturally got on every nerve in your body. In response to your words, she pushes off the wall and uncrosses her arms to step closer to you.

“My problem? You're the one with the problem,” Se-mi spoke as she looked at you with annoyance. The audacity you had to call her a bitch as if you were any better. Seeing you like this made her believe all your kindness really was an act for your own personal gain. That only fueled her hatred for you.

“You're the one who's been glaring at me since day one. You're a total fucking dickhead with your arrogant attitude,” you speak as you point an accusatory finger in her face. You were sick of how she'd act and the way she'd judge everyone silently. She needed a wake up call or something so she'd stop standing on her high horse. After all, she glared at you first. What were you supposed to do? Let her treat you like that? Hell no. You might be all for making friends but that doesn't mean you'll back down when someone chooses to be your enemy.

Then suddenly, out of the blue - her hand wrapped around your throat and she pushed you onto the wall. “I'd watch your mouth when you speak to me,” she says with anger bubbling inside her. Calling her arrogant? Who did you think you were? Someone needed to put you in your place.

You were taken aback by the sudden violence before grabbing her wrist tightly and glaring at her. “Or what? What are you going to do about it? Kill me?” you spoke sarcastically. You didn't fear her at all or the hand around your throat. It's not like she'd kill you. She couldn't have the guts to murder someone. You knew her type. Assholes on the outside, total pussies on the inside. They all just made enemies with people they assumed were weak so they could act tough.

She was quiet for a moment as she thought about your words. She couldn't kill you, no. You wouldn't learn anything that way (and she might get in trouble for that). She'd have to take a different approach if she wanted to make you learn a lesson about your bitchy behavior and, thankfully, she knew just how to make someone learn a lesson. She smirked for a moment before nodding her head.

“I won't kill you, no. I'll teach you a lesson,” she spoke before suddenly pressing her lips to yours. Her hand stayed wrapped around your throat, lightly squeezing to serve as a warning. You didn't expect her to kiss you of all things. It left you frozen in shock. Her kiss wasn't gentle either. It was rough as if its purpose was to silence you. There was nothing loving about it and, strangely enough, you found yourself actually being turned on by it. You didn't have feelings for her, no. You hated her but you were stuck in a place like this with no guarantee of a tomorrow so maybe a little hatefuck wouldn't be a terrible idea.

“Fuck, you're a shitty kisser,” you speak when she pulls away. She lets out a bitter chuckle at your words and shakes her head. “Thought I told you to watch your mouth?” She said as her free hand trailed down to the waistband of your pants. Oh, Se-mi was going to make sure you submit and watch your attitude towards her from now on.  “You think I'll listen to you?” You respond snarkily. 

“Oh, you will,” she says, her hand making it to your underwear as she gently traces the fabric of it. She moves her hand beneath the fabric and gently feels your entrance. “You're wet. You're just a whore, huh?” she spoke with a mocking smirk. She found it amusing that you were turned on by something like this. 

You were about to make a quick comment in response when she quickly slid her index finger into you making you let out a moan. God, you didn't expect her to do that so suddenly. She was full of surprises today. You quickly recovered from the initial shock as you noticed the smug look on her face. It drove you insane. If she thought she was teaching you a lesson like this, you'd have to teach her one too.

“Don't think you're in control,” you speak before grabbing the back of her head and pressing your lips to hers. Se-mi would be lying if she said she wasn't a little taken aback by the sudden kiss. She had assumed you'd fold immediately but apparently you were much more of a challenge. She smirked into the kiss before pulling her finger out slowly and then teasingly thrusting it back in. You let out a muffled moan at the feeling as you bring your free hand to the hem of her shirt. You lift it up slightly before putting your hand underneath and slowly trailing it upwards. 

“Might want to try harder to please me. You do a poor job at fingering a girl,” you speak after breaking from the kiss. She shakes her head with the smirk not leaving her face as she starts to thrust her fingers in and out of you quicker. “Oh really? Your body says otherwise,” she says, her hand tightening around your throat once more to serve as a silent warning. 

“I'm not even close to getting to cum. Can't you do any better?” You say as your hand that had earlier slipped under her shirt pinched her nipple. She tensed for a moment as her breath hitched, making you laugh. “What? That sensitive?” You tease and she sends a glare at you. She could try to dominate you as much as she wants but you weren't one to submit so easily.

She suddenly presses her thumb to your clit and starts to rub it roughly. The sensation makes you lean your head back against the wall as you moan. “Seems like you're the sensitive one,” she says as she watches your reactions carefully. As much as you wouldn't ever admit it, she was actually quite good with her fingers. She knew exactly how to move them and get someone to cum quite quickly. 

“if we weren't stuck here, I'd show you how good I could really fuck you,” you speak with a smirk as you look back at her again. “sure you could,” she responds sarcastically as she continues to thrust her fingers at a quick pace. She could tell you were close now as she felt you clench around her fingers.

“You're close, huh?” she says, clearly mocking you. You laugh breathlessly as you shake your head and look to the side. God, she was still such a cocky bitch. You looked at her before pulling on her hair and glaring at her. “When I cum, I'll make you lick your fingers clean, yeah?” you speak and the smirk on her face seems to grow bigger. Fuck, she really didn't think you'd still be acting so dominant. It was actually turning her on more - getting to fight for dominance like this.

With a few more thrusts of her fingers you came undone with a quiet moan. She slowly pulls her fingers out of you and you don't waste a second to grab her hand and pull it out of your pants. “C’mon, suck,” you say as you bring her hand to her mouth, her fingers wet with your cum. She looks at you for a moment before slowly putting her fingers into her mouth and sucking them clean of your cum. She pulls them out of her mouth after a few seconds and, as if on cue, the door unlocked meaning the guards had finished cleaning.

You both looked at the door before looking at each other again. “If you make it out alive of this place, I'll have to fuck you on my dildo next time,” she speaks as she steps back from you. “Looking forward to it- seeing you embarrass yourself, i mean,” you respond before walking out without another word and leaving her alone in the room. She watched you walk out before scoffing.

���She better make it out alive,”

[mossheadmandy]

Things to remember and other unpopular opinions about Jonathan Byers:

1. He bites his nails when he's anxious.

2. He decides against wearing neckties because he doesn't know how to tie them. Lonnie was never around to teach him.

3. He was probably an accident.

4. He's too empathetic and patient to make objective decisions.

5. He's thought as a freak not in the same way Eddie is. He's calm, quiet and remains outcasted by choice because, like he told Nancy, he dislikes most people. Eddie, on the other hand, is outcasted against his will, but he likes to be surrounded by friends, he takes care of his sheep because he knows what it's like; he's whimsical and loud, while Jonathan prefers to keep a low profile.

6. Remember when Jonathan beat the shit out of Steve? He knows what people say about him and he doesn't care, but the very moment Steve started to mess with his family, that's when Jonathan reacted and beat his ass. What happened with the Nancy graffiti was probably part of it, but let's remember that he wanted to simply take her out of there peacefully until Steve started to poke at his nerves.

7. During the first season, that one scene where Eleven is in the improvised tank trying to locate Barb and Will, as soon as the lights start to blink, everyone looks up at the lights, but Jonathan keeps an eye on Eleven.

8. He had to become 'the man of the house' at a very young age with Lonnie's absence, and he had to parent both Will and Joyce, in a way.

9. Joyce mentioned that Jonathan was always independent and knew how to take care of himself. Eldest siblings, we know what this means, and please tell me that very statement doesn't break your heart.

10. Jonathan had to deal with a lot at the ripe age of sixteen. Not only did he witness the crumbling of his parents marriage, but also take care of his little brother not as a brother but as a father figure, work to help Joyce make ends meet, deal with the guilt of Will's disappearance because the very night he disappeared, he was out at work, deal with a funeral for his little brother and choose a coffin, and then hunt monsters and witness very gory things, and be constantly on edge due to the government keeping an eye on him and his family plus not knowing when the monsters and any other evils of the Upside-down would be back.

11. I'm sorry but Jonathan Byers is what Steve Harrington fans think Steve is.

12. He's very observant.

13. The OG mixtape maker.

14. He's very family-oriented and his priorities are clear.

15. He's always in disadvantage because of his socio-economic situation, so he has to work extra hard to demonstrate that he's worthy. Probably also, in a way, he felt like he had to clean the last name of the Byers while he was in Hawkins.

16. He's very genuine because he had never felt like he had to impress anybody. Quite the contrary, in fact, given that he dislikes most people, the least thing that he wanted was to have people approaching him.

17. Had not Jonathan seen Steve storming off the bathroom, he would probable have had a new friend. Or potentially a girlfriend. A goth girlfriend.

Remember Samantha, at Tina's party? Jonathan made her laugh. He wasn't used to talk to people, nor did he know how to keep a conversation going, but Samantha looked comfortable, probably found his awkwardness endearing, and they could have kept talking, but then Steve came out of the bathroom, visibly upset and Jonathan knew something was up, and went looking for Nancy.

18. Jonathan took Nancy home because it was the safe thing to do, and also because he likes her. But if you'd really understood the character, you'd know Jonathan would have taken Nancy home even if there was nothing between them because he had always taken care of other people. Jonathan takes care of Nancy because he's an older brother, and Steve never learned about taking other people's feelings into account nor to take care of other people because he's an only child, and didn't learn it from anyone else because in his own words, his father is a major a-hole, so he had no good examples on how to be a decent human being since he was a kid.

20. Jonathan probably lied for Steve's sake. The day after Tina's party, Nancy talked to him and asked him if Steve had asked Jonathan to take her home and he said yes. Then proceeded to reassure her that Steve was only being like that because he cared about her.

Steve didn't ask him to take Nancy home because for starters he was NOT OKAY with him taking her home. He was beyond pissed.

You see, Jonathan knows yet denies himself his own feelings for Nancy because he knows he can't have her, but also because he thinks she's happy with Steve, and her feelings are more important to him than acknowledge his own.

20. Jonathan is just quiet, asocial and introverted, and that's a personality too.

I'm tired of people thinking he's bland just because his personality isn't loud like Eddie's or Steve's, quirky like Robin's, or strong like Nancy's. He isn't that physically strong but he's always willing to fight and aid, and the fact that his support goes unnoticed because it's usually silent upsets me to no end.

21. He could probably see an escape to his old life in Hawkins as soon as he got to Lenora Hills because his last name had no reputation.

22. I coud never say his character got ruined by turning into a stoner because, even if though I'm not celebrating his consumption of weed, I don't condemn it. After everything he's gone through, finding a way to forget about it for a moment is the least thing Jonathan deserves. Which is also the reason I don't understand the Argyle hate. He's the first friend Jonathan has made because he sees him for who he is, and Argyle is wise, gives him good advice and he's always ready to lend a hand.

Jonathan Byers is an extremely underrated character and I'm sick of it.

[breakyourrxles]

❥between two breaths (m) | 𝟙𝟘

𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐡

↳ You become comfortable... and suppose you always knew that it would eventually lead to your breaking point.

kim sunwoo x fem!reader (side lee juyeon x reader) — idol!sunwoo, fan/trainee!reader. forced proximity, forbidden love, friends to lovers, angst, slow burn, idolverse-typical themes regarding; dating, image, public perception, etc. happy ending, plot-heavy!! reader thinks she's nonchalant about it but she rly isn't. smut. [6,5k wc ongoing] cws: heavy themes of wanting-but-can't-having, mild jealousy, explicit sexual content, a little alcohol consumption, dancing on the edge of career suicide, poor decision making because of The Wanting.

❥ masterlist | ao3

Eric's voice drops to just above a whisper and he says, "It's gotta be pretty obvious by now, right? Everything? I can promise you he isn't just handing out his personal information to any pretty girl at a fansign."

Weekends are long with music show promotions and additional schedules fitted into all of the potential breathing spots. Days feel as though they never truly end with the next starting shortly after and with next to no time in between. You're tired, you're overworked, but this is the life that you knew you were signing up for.

You are given a Monday. A single Monday morning where you are gifted by chance the opportunity to not have a schedule. Sleep feels as though it is an impossibility to ever truly catch up on, and your body is so used to waking at the early, dark hours of the night that even with nothing to do, rest can no longer find you.

Thus, you shoot off a text. A hope for companionship that carries no expectations along with it. 

"Good morning, I've already got you a coffee. Looks like you could use it."

Juyeon's thoughtfulness is something you have grown only somewhat accustomed to, because he is inclined to think of things long before you have had the chance to. He smiles at you gently from his seat at the small table and the aroma of freshly roasted coffee beans and blooming pastries from the back of the building fills the room with otherwise quiet welcoming.

You sit down across from him and immediately drop your forehead to the table.

"That bad, huh?"

Groaning, you only barely lift yourself to grant him your attention. "I feel like I've been awake for a week straight."

"Yeah, that's not uncommon. There's more where that came from." Pushing the mug towards you, it lightly bumps your hand. "Drink up, I'm sure you've got stuff to do in the afternoon, too."

"Of course I do. There's always something."

Through idle conversation you discover that The Boyz are slated for a comeback in the not so distant future. It will be their first since MVNE's debut, and you're interested to watch the inner workings of a group you have followed as a fan for so long from the inside, rather than out. Maybe you can learn something from all of this; develop better time management, figure out a way to not feel as though all of your strength is being sucked out of your body each and every day.

Unfortunately, the expectations of a rookie group and that of a far more established one are different, and this is something that you know all too well already.

Eventually, Juyeon finishes his drink and shoves the empty mug off to the side. His elbow comes up to sit atop the polished wood of the table and his chin sits just inside of his palm. He looks at you with a sort of amused adoration that you've never quite seen from him, though you have seen it before.

"It's nice that we can meet like this," he says.

Something inside of your chest flutters ever so slightly, and that is wholly unexpected. You feel the same, because this is the closest thing you have to anything resembling what's left of your real and normal life.

It's so much easier to carve out normalcy with Juyeon than it is to do so with Sunwoo, a fact that is terribly unfair to either of you, but a fact nonetheless.

And Sunwoo is not the only person not currently present that springs to mind.

Nervously shifting in your seat, you chuckle under your breath and say, "Well, as it would turn out, there are other people who wouldn't mind having this opportunity to sit here with you."

Juyeon's eyes widen just for a second, seemingly surprised by the news.

"Is that so?"

"My member Nara," you begin, "Turns out she has taken quite a fancy to you." Neither of you say anything for a few long moments after that, and though you are somewhat expecting a response from him, nothing ever comes. So, you prompt him further by saying, "She's pretty, talented; has a strong personality that I actually think would match you quite well. What do you think?"

Giving something of a half-smirk, Juyeon sits back in his chair and slumps down just a bit. He crosses his arms over himself and looks up towards the ceiling as if he is mulling the information over in his mind thoroughly before ever offering up a response. While he does so, you simply watch and wait.

Finally, he sighs and says, "I can't say I'm really looking to get involved with anyone right now." His attention is still up and away; thoughtful and rife with consideration. "I'm sure she's lovely, and I certainly have noticed her on the stage, it's just…"

Juyeon trails off, and finally, his gaze falls back down squarely to you.

"It's not easy doing this. Meeting someone, getting to know them, navigating everything that comes before establishing whether or not we're a good fit for one another. It's a lot of work in the best of circumstances—when there's just two normal, curious people with an inkling of interest—much less given all of these added hurdles."

Leaning forward and fitting his chin into his palm once more, he smiles at you and says, "I'm afraid I'm just not up to the task right now, and particularly not with someone that I've not already traversed those hurdles with. I prefer it when it's easy, when it's natural." A contented sigh follows, and finally his smothering attention towards you breaks in favor of the croissant sitting on the plate between you. "I like to let things happen, and it'll all fall into place like it's meant to."

The spell you'd been inadvertently locked into breaks, and you're not sure you've taken a single breath while Juyeon's sights have been set on you.

When the music cuts off, you know what's waiting for you on the other side of it.

For now, the room is filled with damp, heavy air and the rhythmic sounds of heavy breathing. You slump down to rest your hands against your knees—it's been two hours of nonstop dance practice and going over certain routines—and to say you're tired is an incredible understatement.

You've not spent much time with Woori in the last few weeks, since right before and leading through your comeback promotions. Not alone, at least. All of MVNE are racking up a dense list of personal schedules, not to mention full group engagements, and personal time spent with the members dwindles throughout the days; right before your very eyes.

Before you've really noticed, it's all just sort of gone.

But Woori has asked you to be here with her today during some of the few hours that the both of you have managed to carve out simultaneously. She could be spending this time doing anything else; resting, relaxing, tending to the relationships outside of her career that, like everyone else's, have surely suffered.

Instead, she is here with you.

A loud sigh is exhaled from behind you, followed by the crinkling of a roughly-handled water bottle soon to be consumed. You glance back ever so slightly, but before you are fully able to turn a hand is extended with a bottle intended for you.

Accepting it, you stand fully, and for what feels like the first time since this excursion has begun, both of your attention is fully resting on the other.

"I need to ask you this, because it's my job," Woori says. There is little combativeness in her tone despite what the words themselves might suggest, and rather, the air of it all gives a sense of anticipation. Anticipation towards something else, perhaps something more akin to disappointment. "Realistically, I've accepted a long time ago that I am not your mother, nor do I want to take on that role in the group. Still…"

Your eyes remain fixed on her through a bout of momentary silence until she finally continues on to say, "You and Sunwoo."

Though your stomach drops, you do your best to mask it. Instead, your features twist into evident confusion. "What about us?"

"That's what I'm asking you. It's going to be easier for everyone going forward if I know about things that I can get ahead of."

You wonder if she knows. If somehow, word has traveled through the pipeline of onlookers living at an apartment complex where you definitely shouldn't have been. Being set up to lie is far from an ideal circumstance, and if Woori knows about your escapades either following Idol Radio or showing up to Sunwoo's shared accommodation, you'd prefer her to just come out with it.

The irony of desire for a truthfulness that you, yourself, are unwilling to give is not lost on you.

Taking a long sip of water, your eyes fall away from her in correlation with what you can only assume to be guilt. 

"Nothing is going on," you lie. "If anything, I see Juyeon these days more often than I see him."

"Is that because he's busy, or something else?"

"Sunwoo is my friend, I shouldn't be demonized for wanting to see him. I understand that the circumstances are the way they are but there are other people inside of our very own group who are hoping to plant the seeds of express interest, yet all of the concern seems to be set on me."

Woori's eyes narrow in a kind of way that alludes to her not being aware of the thing that you are calling attention to. Good, you think, because deflection was precisely the plan.

"Put a pin in that other thing for a second," she says, exhaling a deeply perturbed sigh, "but you know the stakes are incredibly high in your situation specifically. Even just with his little stint on Idol Radio the reception was not all that positive, and that's just from him vaguely bringing the fact up. What do you think is going to happen if it were to ever come out as there being fire behind the smoke?"

"I know that. Nobody knows that better than I do."

"Lines have already been crossed," Woori warns, "I've seen it with my very own eyes, and who's to say what else I haven't seen?" She sighs again, allows a second of silence to pass between you and then says, "Miyoung said you weren't home the other night with the rest of them."

"What are you suggesting?"

"I'm not suggesting anything, you're going to tell me, and then we're going to drop the subject for now. I don't enjoy rehashing this any more than you do."

More water, because it buys you some time. You drink it down and think through your options as far as this line of questioning is concerned. You're not going to tell her—you can't tell her that you went to his dorm—but at this point you have also lost the ardent will to defend yourself to any believable length. If it is always going to be like this, if you are always going to be on the receiving end of doubt; then why bother making such an effort to be especially believable?

Until something definitive is seen, then nothing you or Sunwoo do really, actually matters.

"I went for a walk. We don't get out much these days."

Woori merely stares at you. Her expression is fairly unchanged, and though there is little present to work from, what you most certainly find hanging there is doubt.

She sucks her teeth loudly and as if never having heard your response at all she says, "And what's this about the other thing then?"

"Oh, Nara's sudden budding intrigue in Juyeon, you mean?" You huff out a disbelieving laugh under your breath. "Seems like you've got your work cut out for you, leader."

"That's… Unpleasant," is all she says for a good few moments after the fact, as if giving herself time to navigate through her own thoughts on the matter. "But I don't need to tell you it's not the same thing."

Already having made your way to your disheveled bag and gathering your belongings, you shrug.

"Yes, I believe we've been over that more than a handful of times."

"I'll deal with Nara, but at the end of the day I don't have control over what she decides to do," Woori reasons. "Just like I don't ultimately have control over what you decide to do, either. In a perfect world and if things were up to me, we'd be at least—oh, I don't know—two or three years into our careers before I have to deal with an absolute avalanche of dating scandals?"

You look back at her from over your shoulder, and though you don't immediately reply, the face you give is loud with seriously?

"Juyeon isn't interested," you say. "So, I don't think you have to worry too much about that."

Woori hums. "I'm not so sure this is putting my concerns to rest," she says, eyes narrow and distrusting after having been presented with new information. Perhaps, more information than you had ever intended on giving. "If anything, it may be introducing more."

"First you're upset about the possibility of a relationship forming, now you're upset that it won't be?" you question. "Some leaders can never be pleased, I suppose."

"My qualms definitely aren't with his alleged disinterest in her."

You stand, slinging your bag over your shoulder and heading towards the door with Woori alongside. There's little more than a split second that goes by where the two of you meet eyes, and through that exchange alone, you already come to an understanding of everything she is concerned by.

Whether or not it's for good reason, remains yet to be seen.

"It's why," she says. 

Enthralled with the conversation you are engaged with, you don't even notice the nearing doom that is soon to descend upon your table at the company cafe.

A plastic tray drops down with a loud thud, all three of you start as a result of it. You, Serri and Kaia all immediately look up with disgusted expressions to discover the culprit of your interrupted good time.

To say you're not expecting it would be an understatement.

"Hi."

Eric stands there beside your table with his arms limply by his side, but there is nothing casual about his face. Instead, there's a hint of a smile that you absolutely do not like the look of, and naturally; his attention has fallen fully to you.

Serri's eyes drift from him and back to you. She says, "Do you know him?"

"Sort of," you answer. "I mean, in a kind of colloquial sense." Still facing Eric, you then choose to address him going forward. "Can we help you?"

"No. Well, sort of. I want to talk to you."

Not ideal.

There are few things on the docket of potential discussion points that might ever lead Eric to needing to talk to you, and in fact, there's really only one. One topic that you do not need brought up in the company of other people, and you would even go as far as to say should make rather obvious reasoning for not approaching you in that very same company, at all.

But, here he is. Not exactly gentle in his delivery, either.

Looking back to both of the girls for a second, you look to him again and say, "Okay, but I'm with my members, so—"

And just as quickly, both Serri and Kaia are gathering their things and seemingly moving towards making their fastest possible exit from the scene.

"No thank you," Serri says. "Whatever this is, I can assure you I don't want any part of it."

Kaia smiles, bows to him, and with swift agreement says, "Great seeing you, she's all yours!"

Just like that, they're gone.

Eric wastes no time plopping himself down into one of the just emptied seats, and pressing himself nearly halfway across the table—that still lingering, shit-eating grin ever present—he says, "Sunwoo."

You blink through silence a few times. "What about him?"

"You tell me! I heard about your little stint not that long ago, word travels fast through the dorms as I'm sure you could have anticipated. Changmin was very amused."

"Happy to provide some… amusement, I guess." You try your best not to let your discomfort in relation to the topic show, but sit wholly unaware of how good of a job you are actually doing. "I wanted to visit my friend, he's been busy lately. I'm sure you've noticed."

Waving a dismissive hand in the air, Eric rolls his eyes. "Sure, sure. Whatever. Do you really think I'm going to believe that? He told me how he showed up to yours that one time and you nearly tossed him over the side of the balcony railing, now all of a sudden you're showing up and I'm just expected to believe it's no big deal? Just felt like popping in for a visit? No big deal?"

He's annoying, but he is quite adept at doing fairly simple math.

Still, Eric probably means well but you can't let him in. As of now, comeback preparations for his group have begun ramping up, and with the years they have under their belt it results in longer days and much busier schedules than anything MVNE could even really begin to fathom yet. From one day to the next it feels like Sunwoo went from being almost obnoxiously underfoot to hardly ever heard from. Shows, practice, recordings and filming. If not one thing, there is always another waiting just around the bend.

As a result, communication with him has slowed nearly to a halt. Now, it is you who waits in the wings for a reply to a message that may not ever actually come. Humiliatingly humbling.

You spend a good portion of your days trying not to care.

Unfortunately, a byproduct of this is not entirely knowing where it is that the two of you stand. Sunwoo had been clear in the past; forthcoming and honest with his heart on his sleeve like he often does, and though your circumstances together had seemed to be headed in an evident direction then, the lack of communication has you wondering if at some point, unrealized by you, the path had diverted.

Maybe he is simply too busy to embark on that journey, and maybe a looming comeback and highly successful career is serving as something of a reminder of that fact.

Eric is still watching you.

"I guess I'm testing the limits of what I can reasonably get away with," you say, and it's not a complete lie. "I'm beginning to catch onto the fact that I take all of this just a little bit more seriously than everyone else does."

Jolting back, as if physically hit by the words you have just spoken, Eric's face twists like he can't believe what he's hearing, like it's the most absurd thing he has ever heard.

"You can't really believe that, right? That nobody else is taking their career seriously because they don't refuse to live, eat and breathe this shit every second of every day?" He snorts out a laugh and then continues on to say, "Come on, everybody clocks out. Even us. Even you."

"How are you not terrified of the prospect of becoming another article online? How do you not let that dictate your whole entire life?"

"Because it's going to happen anyway, whether I want it to, or not. Like, I could stay locked up inside of this building for months and if somebody wakes up one day and decides they want there to be some news about me, then there's going to be."

You raise an eyebrow. "So, what? Might as well give them something worth talking about then?"

He rolls his eyes again, as if quickly growing tired of your unrelenting antics.

"No, man! But listen… Is it really worth it to forgo every single aspect of yourself and your life just for this? Like, don't get me wrong, this is great, but it's all going to go away one day." Finally, he sets his sights on a melon slice sitting on his plate and shoves it into his mouth. "Most of us aren't going to still be doing this at 35, or 40; and then what do you have to show for it all? It's like starting again from scratch. At the very least, maybe you could have met someone along the way."

"I don't think most inactive idols who are married met their spouse while they were idols," you reason, but to that, Eric gives you a look of resounding doubt.

"A lot of them very much did."

Leaning back against the chair, Eric shrugs all nonchalant, like none of this really means anything to him either way. You know this to be untrue, however, due to his being here in any capacity whatsoever. It clearly does, and that fact alone rings alarm bells in your head.

He knows, he's onto you. It just so happens he has the tact not to say it out loud.

"Look, all I'm saying is that it doesn't have to be like this, you don't need to be so uptight about it all. No one else is, and most of them manage to escape out of the other side relatively unscathed. Think of it this way…" Eric meanders on the thought like he isn't entirely sure he wants to broach it to begin with, though ultimately, his nature betrays his sense of self-preservation. With another melon slice in hand, he waggles it vaguely in your direction and says, "How long were you following us as a fan—closely, might I add—and you never suspected a thing, now did you?"

A prior conversation with Juyeon springs to mind in that moment, but even more than that is the curious sensation that trickles up beneath your skin. You do think it through before rattling the question off, but you understand yourself enough to know that there was no chance of either of you leaving this interaction without it being laid out on the table.

"Sunwoo was…?"

"Ah!" Another melon slice is popped into his mouth, though he looks far too pleased with himself about all of this for your liking. He smiles through chews and says, "There's always women. Well, not always. I don't mean it like that…"

"Very tasteful…"

"You know what I'm trying to say! This isn't news to you so don't act like it is now just because you're all jealous and weird with each other, because the other thing you've no doubt learned through years of Sunwoo-viewing is that the bad boy schtick falls flat pretty much immediately once he's pressed about it. He's kind of a loser, a little pathetic but he means well. We like that about him, but girls don't. It's kinda like when you think you're buying a truck online for a killer deal and then it arrives and it's just a picture of the truck and then it's like oh, I guess that's why it was ₩1,000."

The two of you stare at each other in silence for a while after that, but eventually, Eric cuts through that once again.

"Anyway, you get what I mean."

"Was there a point to all of this?"

"Yes, the point is that a lot of people are probably going to tell you not to do anything to jeopardize all of this and I am here to tell you that you should forget everything they've ever told you and to just be smart, stay vigilant, and live your life. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity—all of this—so don't wake up one day and realize all you have to show for ten years of it is some Inkigayo trophies. Ya know, if you can help it."

The thought that follows is far and beyond against your better judgment, but Eric is nothing if not persistent, as well as offering a hefty dash of what you might consider to be some much needed hopeful optimism.

Your head falls into your hands, and with your face cradled between palms so tightly that it pushes and reforms the skin, you say, "So what you're saying is that I should just… date Sunwoo. Or whatever. That's what you're saying."

Sinking closer towards you over the table—so close that the scene probably appears incredibly inappropriate to any potential onlookers—Eric's voice drops to just above a whisper and he says, "It's gotta be pretty obvious by now, right? Everything? I can promise you he isn't just handing out his personal information to any pretty girl at a fansign."

"He certainly acts like he would."

Evidently the meeting has come to a rather abrupt end, because Eric shoots up from his chair and takes the tray back into his hands as he begins his self-aggrandizing strut away.

"That's the fun of it!" he says. "Playing pretend, give the people what they want, but at the end of the day; there's really only one."

Later that evening you receive a message.

The sound of it comes unexpectedly, and you're already fairly tucked into bed for the night on account of the late hour and much to do in the following days. 

Your phone screen glows from the table beside you, and though you look at it suspiciously and have half a mind to ignore it, you cannot will yourself to do so. 

Picking it up, you look at the notification and by some miracle, are surprised by what awaits you.

It's Sunwoo, and there's a photo attached. Your memory springs back to the last time he sent you a picture, and while you hope it's nothing of the sort, you are pleased to be hearing from him at all.

Filming for his drama often runs late at night and though you've not been able to meet with him much, occasionally the groups pass one another in the halls and you can see the evidence of a demanding schedule taking hold. His shoulders droop more, under eyes darker and a little less pep to his step than what you're used to seeing. 

Now, past one in the morning, he is messaging you.

Opening the app, the photo that awaits you is not anything you could have anticipated. It certainly isn't in line with the previous one in question; A beautiful, darkened landscape of trees with fairy lights draped through them, a cobblestone path with a light dusting of snow covering it, and a charming, brightly lit coffee truck with a couple of staff members lingering in wait.

The fact that he would see this and then think of you is not at all lost. Sunwoo has always been something of a romantic at heart, and though a lot of time has been lost since the last time it has felt like something may have been developing, it feels so incredibly him at his very basic core.

There is no text, only the image.

So, you begin typing back to him. A feat that is far from simple like the times it may have been before, and now you feel a sense of anxiety when drafting up what best to say. Talking to Sunwoo used to feel so easy when perhaps there was nothing on the line in doing so.

A few beginnings are drafted and then quickly deleted in favor of something better that you haven't yet thought of. You sigh aloud inside of your dark, empty room and make a pointed effort to center your thoughts so that you can do this. You wanted him to message you, can't leave him waiting forever for a reply now.

Eventually, you figure maybe less thought is better, because overthinking it will make the entire thing seem forced and contrived. Nothing is different now just because a handful of the minute circumstances between the two of you have changed; it's still just you and Sunwoo, the same people from before, the same friendship from before.

Sort of.

You [01:16]: pretty! they really are going for that romantic dramatization aren't they? super late night for you huh.

Almost as soon as you send the message, the indication that Sunwoo is typing once again flies up. He must have been waiting for your reply—never even locked his phone in anticipation of it—and that thought reignites something that you can undeniably recognize as dangerous inside of you: Wanting.

S [01:16]: filming wrapped already, wanted to see if you're awake. can i come over?

Your vision blurs reading over the words.

The girls are home but the dorm has been deathly quiet for quite some time now. Every light is off save for a handful of nightlights that decorate the halls. It's unusual even for you to be awake at this hour with how busy you have been. 

With your breath unsteadying, you inhale deep and begin typing your response.

You [01:17]: everyone is home, it's late

S [01:17]: not what i askedddddd yes or no

The fact that he is asking at all is already an incredible feat of growth as far as Sunwoo-relations are concerned. It's unusual for him to think anything through, much less have the foresight to ask for permission on a decision rather than default to seeking forgiveness after the fact. For this reason, you know that he is absolutely up to something, you just don't know what it is yet.

But maybe you want to find out.

With a shaky exhale that does not have the strength to steady your nerves, you type out your reply, and it is nothing more than a simple yes.

And for as much as you think yourself to be someone who has a relatively thorough understanding of his inner-workings, nothing could have prepared you for the next reply to come to you.

S [01:18]: outside. open up

Eyes widening, terror strikes you in that very moment and you leap to your feet. If any of the girls—or anyone else for that matter—happens to see him outside of your dorm it's going to be the unearthing of a whole set of problems that you very much prefer to remain buried. He's insane, and perhaps is a bit less calculated than you had just been giving him credit for, but more than all of that; it is exhilarating.

You pull on some sweatpants that might be backwards and rush yourself towards the front door as quietly as you possibly can. Looking towards the doors of your members, they are closed, but that does little to calm your fears as you begin to spiral into self-doubt about whatever it is that you have seemingly agreed to. Sunwoo cannot be seen here, not again, and you can only imagine that Woori's patience is growing rather thin despite not even understanding a fraction of the catastrophe that looms overhead.

Hand on the door, you take a deep breath and then… you open it.

What greets you isn't an adoring smile or a small wave, but the feeling of another body crashing directly into yours. You stumble back a few steps and try to maintain the wherewithal to deal with the door you could easily leave behind, but Sunwoo is handling it; removing himself from you only long enough to shut it as quietly as humanly possible, without so much as a single sound.

What follows is another flurry of lips, hands and teeth as he presses you into the kitchen and against the furthest back counter, a nook wholly out of sight should anyone cast a glance out from a doorway. Sunwoo's hands cradle your face as he kisses you, but this time is not like the last. There is nothing chaste nor gentle about his intent to taste you, and there is no effort from you not to meet him halfway in the endeavor either.

Sunwoo motions for you to hoist yourself up, and seated atop the faux-marble his hands drop to sit against your thighs. There is no sign of slowing down, only a desperate sense of urgency and the unraveling of something that has been too tightly wound for far too long.

It feels good. Too good. Intoxicatingly free to just let go. 

Your hands slip down to disappear under his hoodie, quick to locate the flesh that resides somewhere underneath. His muscles tense and shift at the feeling of the touch, sensitive but pleased to be on the receiving end of it all the same. Sunwoo kisses you harder, deeper; gasps into your mouth at the feeling of your hands on him and you drink it all down like there is nothing else left in the room to sustain you.

When his mouth eventually begins to trail elsewhere, you are finally able to hear the heavy beating of your heart ringing through your ears. Plush, soft lips find their intended mark lust below your ear, a devilish tongue that rakes over any spot where his teeth had just been, and your head falls back against the wall a little bit harder than it should, given the necessity of secrecy.

His palms slide up your thighs and settle at your waist, though there is no intention of them staying there given the way fingernails graze at your skin as he slowly curls his fingers into the waistband.

The implications of it all bring you to a crashing halt, and still clutching at the skin of his waist you whisper out, "Wait…"

Sunwoo's head pops up only enough to make eye contact, and the look on your face must say everything that he needs to know, because a salacious grin curls into his lips before once again tending to the work at hand.

His lips find the shell of your ear, breath ghosting over it in ways that electrify your entire body.

"You think I'm gonna fuck you in your kitchen the first time?" he whispers, voice raspy and laden with lust. "Come on, you know me better than that."

Not that you had been meaning to, but if there had been a reply in wait from you it would have been ripped away right along with the firm yank of that waistband from your hips.

Fabric pools on the ground below, and Sunwoo comes up to kiss you again. This time it's brief; lips slide down the column of your neck and you're so dizzy with the immediacy of it all that it isn't until you hear the accidental brush of his knee against a lower cupboard and fingers curling into the fabric still sitting between your legs that you really start to put together the pieces of what's about to happen here.

That knowledge is just as quickly followed by the firm, pointed swipe of his tongue against you.

The gasp that escapes you is too close for comfort as far as volume is concerned. You sling a hand over your mouth, eyes dropping down between your legs to find his, and even more unfortunately for your resolve; he seems to be incredibly amused by it all.

Sunwoo wants you to give in to this, and give in to it, you do. Your free hand settles into his hair and your fingers wrap loose, black curls around and between them as he happily tastes you for the second time tonight. It's sloppy work; little finesse and an unfortunate lack of visual aid to help guide him in the search of having you finally unravel for him. It's so dark, and the both of you have to be even more silent during an exploration that is meant to be anything but.

As much as the odds are stacked against him, it may not end up a failure of an endeavor regardless. This moment has been cultivating for too long between secret meetings and stolen kisses. You can feel the blooming warmth of a release that hopes to come to fruition, and for all of the things that Sunwoo isn't, he does appear to be adept at reading the signs. For everything that he lacks as a result of the situation that the two of you have landed yourselves in, he is nothing if not eager; and that eagerness is hurtling you towards something that you can't be sure you'll be able to stifle when the time comes.

He shifts his position just slightly, and with the additional space he slips a finger inside and curls.

Every muscle in your legs tightens almost painfully so, your eyes screw shut and you have no other option than to drop the hand from your mouth, clutch onto the countertop edge, and pray that this isn't how it's all going to have to come to an end.

The way that the beginning of his name stutters out of your mouth in nothing more than a labored hiss is nearly humiliating, and maybe that's just something that you're going to have to make peace with in the morning. For now, it doesn't matter; the only things carrying any importance being Sunwoo's warm tongue firm and fast at work to make you come for him, and the vision of his eyes staring up at you as you do while he remains knelt down on the kitchen floor.

Through clenched teeth, it all culminates in one long, shattering blow. When you finally do come it's hard fought and leaves you nearly breathless as it takes you; no concern of sounds echoing throughout the dorm as your body heaves a lengthy, silenced gasp.

Sunwoo takes an asserted care in slowing to a halt, though the aftershocks of sensitivity wrack your body with every feather-light glide of his tongue against your body.

When he brings himself back to a standing position, he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and goes in to kiss you all over again.

"Don't make me wait so long next time, would you?" he says against your lips, "I've been waiting ages, it's been excruciating."

"You poor thing," you reply through exchanged kisses. "How ever did you survive?"

Sunwoo hums like something exceedingly sinful has come to mind in response. Eyes still blown out with lust and no such release for himself anticipated here.

"I'll give you a play-by-play of exactly how I survived another time." He kisses you again, this time fuller and with more intent and then says, "You prefer video, or video call?"

Your hands once again curve up to feel the skin of his body beneath his shirt, and Sunwoo just about melts into the touch that you offer. His eyes fall closed, lips lazily meeting yours for the affection that you're offering.

"This is going to be a thing now, isn't it?" you ask, knowing full well that the damage is already done.

"We tried it their way. I like our way better."

And unfortunately, you find that the same goes for you.

end of act 2! 🫣

[sunny374940]

Let me show you how beautiful you are

Hello again, long time no smut. Emmrich is a bit insecure about his body and Rook shows him just how beautiful he finds him. Get loved, old man.

Cw: anal sex

Here on ao3

And here is the rest of my stories.

Rook woke up, blinking muzzily in the darkness of their bedroom. The greyish light of pre-dawn was barely penetrating the curtains, suggesting that it was too damn early to be awake.

He stretched an arm to Emmrich's side of the bed but he was, like most mornings, already up and about, probably getting breakfast ready. As Rook was rolling over to get more comfortable, he caught movement out of the corner of his eye and turned his head towards it, curious.

Emmrich wasn't getting breakfast. In fact, he was standing on the rug next to their bed, his back to Rook, and he was wearing nothing at all.

Well, not a bad sight to wake up to.

And then Emmrich was stretching himself up, raising his arms to the ceiling and the view of the muscles of his back moving under the skin had Rook transfixed. He looked on as Emmrich bent all the way down, touching the floor with his palms and presenting Rook with a rather nice view of his ass.

So he really did exercise in the mornings. Rook still didn't understand why anyone would choose to do that willingly, but decided not to complain, since he was enjoying himself quite a lot.

But he wanted more than just to look at Emmrich, so he sat up and started making his way to the edge of the bed.

“Morning, handsome,” he said as he reached Emmrich, who was now absorbed in stretching his wrists. Emmrich startled at the sound of his voice, turning around.

“Darling, did I wake you?” He sounded so apologetic that Rook almost felt sorry for him.

“Nope, I didn't even notice you at first when I woke up. But I'm glad I got to enjoy the show.”

Emmrich sputtered a bit at that and a blush began creeping upon his cheeks. Ha. He could be the one blushing for a change. Rook got out of bed, standing on his toes to kiss him.

“You're beautiful, you know?” he whispered between kisses. And Emmrich was blushing even more, he noted with a certain degree of satisfaction.

“This body has passed its prime some time ago, my dear, but thank you for the sentiment,” Emmrich said quietly, and he was looking down now, wouldn't meet Rook's eyes and was he… ashamed of himself?

What the fuck?

This wasn't how it was supposed to go. Emmrich should have accepted the compliment, then said something terribly suave to make him blush in turn and then he should have kissed him again, maybe even done more than just kiss him. He wasn't supposed to go all quiet and sad, and Rook had to do something about that. He grasped Emmrich's chin gently with his fingers, making him face him again.

“Hey, I like the way you look. I think I've told you many times already, no?”

“Compared to you, I leave much to be desired, where matters of physicality are concerned,” came the cheerless reply and his were still downcast and Rook wouldn't stand for it. If Emmrich wouldn't believe his words, he would have to believe his actions. Rook caught Emmrich by the hand and dragged him down onto the bed.

“Lie back for me?” he asked and Emmrich obliged with the barest raise of an eyebrow. Rook sat himself on Emmrich's thighs and ran his hands over the skin of his stomach, relishing at the softness he found there. There wasn't a thing he didn't love about him and Emmrich would know that by the time he was done with him.

“You, Emmrich Volkarin, are a beautiful man, and I am going to show you.”

And Emmrich didn't seem to have anything to say for once. The blush was spreading down to his chest and Rook couldn't stop himself from leaning down to kiss him on the flushed skin. He licked at a nipple as he went, earning himself a breathy moan. Rook raised his head to look him in the face and found Emmrich staring at him, enraptured, the lovely hazel of his eyes a thin ring around dilated pupils. He could start there, then.

“I love the color of your eyes, you know? They remind me of summers in the forest where I grew up, the trees glowing in the sunlight. And your crows feet are so adorable, I want to kiss you right there every time you smile.”

And Emmrich did give him a small smile at that and allowed himself to be kissed. They were getting somewhere at last, but still there was a shade of doubt on his face.

Emmrich reached out to link their hands, as if he needed the reassurance, and Rook took the opportunity to raise Emmrich's hand up to his lips, kissing his knuckles. He didn't let go after he was done, instead using his free hand to stroke at Emmrich's fingers, examining them as if he hadn't already committed every line of them to memory.

“Your hands are so strong but you have such delicate fingers it always surprises me. I love how elegant they are when you weave magic… and how they can take me apart.”

He could hear Emmrich’s breath hitch a little and there was a hunger in his eyes, making Rook want to do all manner of delicious things to him.

His cheeks hadn't lost any of the adorable blush and his lips were parted, just begging Rook to kiss him some more. But that would have to wait for a bit longer, as Rook was on a mission now. Emmrich’s free hand came to hold onto Rook's thigh, fingers digging into his skin, not enough to hurt, but enough to tell him just how much he desired him.

Rook's felt his cock grow hard at the sight and Emmrich seemed to be very interested in this development, eyeing him hungrily.

“See what you do to me? Just seeing you like this makes me want to take you,” Rook said, letting his voice lower into a rumble. “Can I?”

“Yes, please,” Emmrich replied, breathless, cock hardening at Rook’s words.

Rook got off of Emmrich's legs, and reached for the vial of oil that stood on the bedside table and set about getting Emmrich ready for him.

He nudged Emmrich's legs apart and stroked oiled fingers against his asshole, applying just the slightest pressure. The way Emmrich moaned at the touch had Rook grinning and he wasted no time, pushing a finger inside, then a second, opening him up, and the sounds Emmrich made were amazing, little breathy moans and sighs of pleasure.

“Are you ready for me, love?” Rook asked, though there was very little doubt about Emmrich's readiness, as he had taken to fucking himself on Rook's fingers, moaning constantly.

“Y-yes darling, very much so.”Rook entered him then, slow and careful, relishing in the groan that Emmrich made when he started fucking him. His head was thrown back, his eyes closed and Rook would be repeating himsef, but he just had to say it.

“You're so beautiful, love.”

And Emmrich whimpered at the praise, a delightful sound that made Rook want more. He hooked Emmrich's legs over his shoulders, grabbing his ass with his hands, giving it a squeeze for good measure.

“You've got an amazing ass. It's just right for me to hold onto when I kiss you. Or fuck you just. Like. This.”

He punctuated every word with a snap of his hips and Emmrich was lost in his arousal, holding onto Rook's forearms as he was thrusting into him.

Rook took pity on him then, taking his cock in hand, stroking it in the way he knew he liked and he could see that Emmrich was getting close to the edge. Although Rook wasn't far behind, as it was taking all his willpower to not cum right away at the way Emmrich was falling apart under him. But he wanted to see him cum first, see the blissful expression on his face, and he wanted it now.

“I love the way you look when you cum. Can you do that for me?”

And Emmrich was nodding, words seemingly lost to him.

“Let me see you, love.”

Those words were all it took and Emmrich's hips seized as he came all over Rook's hand. His mouth opened in a silent cry, his eyes went wide at the force of it and he looked so beautiful that Rook couldn't hold on anymore and followed with his own orgasm, hips stuttering against Emmrich's ass. He slumped over Emmrich, breathing heavily.

“Do you believe me now?” Rook asked, searching Emmrich's face, hoping that there would be none of the self-doubt from earlier.

“I… am beginning to see the truth of your words. Thank you, darling.”

There was only quiet contentment in his eyes, but it wouldn't hurt to ram the point home some more.

“You are the kindest, smartest, most amazing person I have ever met. And you are also very beautiful,” Rook said, leaning down to kiss him.

“You, my dear, are a wonder and I am honored that you think so highly of me,” Emmrich said after their lips parted. “When we met I had no idea that I would gain such a caring lover, yet here you are, giving me such love I never even thought possible.”

“Wow. Um. Thanks.” And now Rook was blushing. All was right in the world again.

[intimidating-fettuccine]

This may be an odd request, but if you are into it, can I request headcanons of Smiley, Helen, and Jason (or characters you want to write) where their partner (reader) dies in front of them on a mission of something, but somehow and for some reason, time gets reversed to start at the beginning of the day, so their partner is alive and sleeping on their bed. Please and thank you!

I sort of imagined it as them going to sleep at the end of the day and waking up and it's the previous day, I hope that's okay <3 This request also made me remember Helen and his heart jar for his dead s/o so we're just gonna pretend that doesn't happen this time :p

This got so long I'm sorry I'm posting this so late-

Smiley:

He was never made for field work, with his preference for medical assistance at the mansion he was never meant to be standing out there in the field. He was never meant to watch you take that fatal injury, to do everything he could to save you out in the woods surrounding you and fail so miserably at it, much to his extreme distress. The following hours before he'd eventually passed out at his medical table had been a mash of absolute pain and misery, feelings he'd assumed he'd be waking up to once more the following morning, but instead, he was met with your beautiful face smiling at him. He'd thought he'd died himself for a moment, after all, he hadn't fallen asleep in bed, but here you are beside him, just as snug as you were the previous morning. It doesn't take long for him to realize what's happened, and Smiley isn't going to waste the chance before him. He's quick to come up with some bullshit but believable reason about why you can't go out on the mission you're meant to, citing doctor's orders and him needing to monitor a concern that came up on a pre-mission health check.

Nobody questions him, although you're left quite concerned by his actions. Nobody else can see it, but you can see the tenseness of his body, his eyes darting about anxiously, the heavy beating of his heart. You can tell he's worried about something, but he won't tell you what it is, he simply can't. He can't bring himself to admit what he saw, what he experienced, not when it's still too fresh in his mind. Perhaps he'll tell you later, but for now, he instead chooses to seek comfort in the fact that by the time the two of you go to bed that night, you're still safe and sound in his arms, just as you are the following, brand new morning, and nothing else other than that matters. It takes far longer than he thought to tell you what truly happened that day, why he refused to let you go on the mission, years down the line, and it's only with your comfort and love for him at that time that allows him to truly grieve and let go of those horrible memories. Suddenly all those days of him being more concerned about you going on missions makes sense, and you apologize for ever questioning his judgment or doubting him, promising to always come home safe to him, just as he does for you.

Jason:

The scream leaving his throat feels as though it should rip it apart, just as he feels like he's being ripped apart at the sight of your dying body crashing to the ground. Jason can barely tell what's happening in the next few hours, between trying desperately to resuscitate you, weeping for your death, and the others trying to keep him from doing something drastic. He barely realizes when he's falling asleep, his mechanical body simply powering off due to overcharge of his emotions, and when he awakes the next morning, he can't help but immediately begin sobbing once more when his eyes land on you. You're still in his satin sleep shirt, oversized on your body and revealing your skin just as it had the morning before, a sleepy smile resting on your cheeks as you gaze at him as he wakes up, but it's different this morning because now you're replaced with immense concern over his sudden outburst. You cradle him close and attempt to comfort him as best you can as he cries and crushes you against his body, so scared that any moment you could slip away again.

It must have been a dream, he reasons. A terrible, horribly bad dream, one that felt far too real, and so he tries to calm down, but he can't. Not when everything in the day progresses the exact same day, and so he shatters, begging you not to go on the mission. He tells you of his "dream", tells you of everything he saw, how he's scared it might actually happen, and you're so devastated by the clear distress he's in, so, of course, you switch out with someone else and stay home. He's so thankful you listened, so thankful a stronger creep took your place, considering the sorry state said creep was in when they got home. It could have been you, but it wasn't. Not this time, not ever again. Jason will never allow you to die in such a way, not now that he knows it's a definite possibility, no. He'll keep you safe and comfortable in his arms, safe from any dangers, just as he is right now, and will continue to do, for the rest of your life. He treasures you far too greatly to ever allow you to truly experience something like that again, and if he can help prevent it in any way at all, he will do so, for you, the love of his life, someone who deserves to live and die in peace.

Helen:

He had such an odd feeling. He'd elected to stay home last minute, as Slender had assumed not all of you would need to attend this mission. However, he felt this clawing, nagging feeling in his chest, and so he ran, ran faster than he ever had before, but he'd been too late. Your blood was fresh as you lay collapsed against a tree, your eyes unfocused as he sat before you. He tried everything he could to try and help you, but it was too late. Others had to find the two of you, as Helen had sat there before you for hours, crying and screaming, revealing emotions nobody other than you had ever seen before. He felt as though he should be dead, as though he should have died with you, but instead there he was, laying in your shared bed, now far colder than usual due to the lack of your body heat. So, if it had been so cold, why was it suddenly so warm when he woke up? Rare tears slip from his eyes as you snuggle into him, just as you had that morning, and he clutches you tightly. He feels as though some god out there must have finally taken pity upon him and done something good for him for once.

You ask what's wrong, and he simply asserts he'll tell you later, instead choosing to look after you that day, to be far more affectionate than usual. When Slender once again offers for someone to fall back, Helen disagrees, saying he has a bad feeling and that maybe someone extra should go to be safe, and so a few do, and Helen is so unbelievably thankful that he and the extra few went. He can't believe you were basically fighting all of these people by yourself, and he hates himself for so casually staying home. He kills the person who was meant to kill you with ease, and the mission is successful. You all make it home, and it's when you're cuddled up once more that night that Helen finally tells you what happened, how you had died, how it could have been his fault, how painful it was. You're momentarily confused, but with how earnestly he's retelling it, you feel as though it must have been true, and so you thank him for saving you this time, thank him for keeping you safe, and he swears to you that he'll continue to do so. For the rest of your careers for Slender, he'll always be there, on every mission, fighting to protect the one true blessing in his life.