#this is what happens if you let your intrusive thoughts win

[mintraindrop]

and can we please talk about this because what is this? why are they like this? and can we please get more about them like this?

[targaryenluvs]

OH BABY!

pairing: finnick odair x fem!reader, young!naive!tribute reader

summary: finnick found you to be as cute as ever. but you aren’t exactly the smartest in the room according to him. luckily, finnicks more than happy to help his sweet baby succeed, and he will not let you forget him.

warnings: AGE GAP (18 - 23) smut, FILTH THIS MAN IS DOWNBAD, possessive, corruption, pervy finnick, violent thoughts/intrusive, exhibitionist? degradation, oral (m & f), p in v, overstimulation, praise, mirror kink? spanking 👀 rough sex? tummy bulge, my first time writing smut be kind 😭

word count: 5k - this is literally the longest fic ive written.

a/n: this is what happens at 6am and i can’t sleep, thoughts are thunk -UPDATE HOLY CRAP THERE IS GONNA BE A NEW MOVIW AND BOOKKKSJSNABS

taglist: @coolchick333 @doublesideeye

“and the female tribute for district four, y/n l/n.” your eye involuntarily twitched at your name being called. the people around you, distanced themselves from you as a path was carved to your own hell.

as you walked to the platform you kept your head down. you were actually hopeful that you’d get through this reaping, your last and then never see the inside of the arena. but of course fate was against you. as you stood in front of the people you couldn’t help the silent tears that fled down your face.

your mothers face was tired and drained, she had a feeling you’d get picked. mothers intuition? your father was pissed, his little girl, his sweetheart, being thrown into an arena to die? and worst of all, there wasn’t anything he could do.

you felt alone, as if no one could help you. and as you said goodbye to the life you knew, you could only pray for safety, and a quick death.

as you were escorted to the train you fiddled with your sweater sleeves. pulling them down, rolling them up, just to focus your mind on something. it was chilly, most likely the air conditioning on the train and sometimes you had to hold down your skirt.

finnick couldn’t take his eyes of you once he saw you on the train. you looked so tiny in the chair and he couldn’t help but smile.

he practically had you all to himself.

“y/n?” your head shot up at your name being called and you were met with finnick odair in all his glory. “finnick? finnick odair?” even calling his name you sounded so unsure, so he smiled and nodded.

“i’m your mentor, and i promise to try my best to get you to win.” he sat down in front of you, spreading his legs and you felt your face warm up. he found you adorable, with a cute white sweater and a short black skirt. you had your hair down with the front parts tied up with a bow. his own personal present.

your shy demeanour reminded him of your young age, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care. you were looking everywhere but at him and he loved it.

“do… do you think i can win?” god no. the tributes would eat you up alive, but he’d try his best. “i do.” with just two words of encouragement, you smiled at him for the first time.

finnick wanted you to smile at him forever.

“are you hungry?” the rumbling of your stomach answered his question, as you ducked your head in your hands in embarrassment.

he moved your hands aside, tilting your chin up, "it's okay to be hungry sweetheart, come on." he held his hand out for you and he laughed at your hesitance. "i don't bite, not unless you want me to.” the last part of his sentence came out hushed and you averted your eyesight from him.

there were so many foods laid out before you, and it wasn’t as if you were poor, but god, it all looked nice. the eclairs took your attention away as you reached for one, your finger sweeping cream off the top before placing it in your mouth. it was sickeningly sugary but you had a sweet tooth, you retracted your finger with a pop! and you somehow didn’t hear finnicks groan.

how on earth were you not realising how dirty it seemed? and it was there finnick realised how pure you were, “its so good,” you flashed him a toothy grin, “you'll have some won't you finnick?" you offered it up to him with two hands and how could he resist? the two of you spent the rest of your time on the train eating and talking, finnick utilising his time to get to know you.

you’d spent a day getting settled and were now to get ready for your interview.

after being prepped and readied, you were shuffled into your dressing room where analise, damian and sarah awaited. a range of compliments were thrown your way.

“oh isn’t she adorable?”

“i could pinch her cheeks forever!”

“you are precious!”

they were so nice to you and you loved it, but you barely ever learned how to take compliments so you ended up just nodding your head. “she is gorgeous,” you snapped your head up to the doorway and there stood your mentor, in all his glory. his compliment felt heavier than the rest, like he truly meant it, and you looked down at your hands as you fought off the blush threatening to rise on your cheeks.

in an hour you’d been through a whirlwind of makeup, dresses and jewels. orange, blue, black and all, you loved each one but for some reason after the four of them discussed you’d always be taken out of it.

it wasn’t until you were placed in an off the shoulder, floor length, white dress that you remained in it. and as you looked in the mirror you couldn’t help but stare. your hair was pinned up again, and small flowers were placed throughout. you felt like a princess and finnick agreed. you hadn’t even noticed that your stylists were gone until you heard the door shut.

it was just you and finnick.

“you look incredible.” finnick whispered, he was behind you now. his hand had a mind of its own as it placed a stray hair behind your ear. you turned your head his way, “really?” your voice was so soft and doused in disbelief. if he wasn’t next to you he wouldn’t have heard you. his hand trailed along your neck as he placed your hair behind, he nodded. “i have something for you.”

he pulled out a small seashell, and your eyes lit up, “oh finnick.” you sighed as he placed it in your hands. “it reminded me of you, small, gorgeous.” you looked up at him with doe eyes and he felt like grabbing you and taking you away.

you were breathtaking and you looked at him as if he was god.

“thank you finn, do you mind maybe putting it in my hair?” he took the trinket and placed it above your ear, entangling in with your hair. your heels were on but untied so finnick got onto his knees before patting his knee. he grabbed the straps before tieing them. his fingertips worked quickly and his face was concentrated. he was done and he looked up at you before turning you to the mirror.

finnicks hands were on your shoulder as he leaned in to whisper, “all done, you look perfect sweetheart.” you turned before reaching up on your tiptoes, “thank you finnick!” you kissed him on his nose before turning back and finnick grinned, “aren’t you cute?” he stood behind you, attached like a shadow. your skin felt soft underneath his fingertips and he couldn’t help but wander. down your arms, to your waist, he could feel you tensing up underneath him and he could feel his face trying to fight off his smirk.

“finnick?” you breathed out, “what’re you doing?” your voice was small, and unsure. “tell me to stop.” you should. you should tell him to stop. but all you could think about was finnicks hands and how good they felt.

“it’s time!” damian shouted out as you peeled away from finnick to open the door. damian was all too happy to see you as he clapped his hands together. “ah, my special girl you are truly an angel.” finnick knew that. finnick has already said that. finnick had you in his arms and oh so close and this idiot took you away. his sweet girl.

finnick was wondering where his trident was so that he could impale him through the stomach.

“come on y/n.” he ushered you out the door but you managed to slip another look at finnick and all you saw was pure rage.

the interview went well, in your eyes at least.

caesar was as upbeat as usual and it did mostly centre around your dress and looks but you felt you could try your best to use it to your advantage.

the audience was enamoured and you felt you did your best. “and y/n, tell us, what’s your secret strategy for the games? any tricks up your sleeve?” you patted his knee before pointing at him jokingly, “well caesar, it wouldn’t be a secret if i divulged now would it?” everyone loved your answer and caesar doubled over, “aren’t you cheeky! isn’t our diamond here so playful? but a sweetheart nonetheless!” the crowd agreed loudly.

“now, since you came out i think we’ve all been wondering where that seashell came from. it doesn’t exactly match the theme of your outfit.” you could hear the murmurs from the crowd agreeing with his words.

“am i right in suspecting a certain blonde mentor of yours?” you pursed your lips and a giggle began to form as caesar pumped his fist in the air, “i think we got it! can we expect the two of you together once you win?” you’d never even had a boyfriend and here you were being put together with the finnick odair, you were sure everyone could tell how giddy you were.

you felt as if you had a million eyes on you, your whole body was heating up as you buried your head in your hands. “ah we caught her out! someone’s got a crush! but then again it’s finnick odair so don’t we all?” a bunch of cheers erupted as you beamed.

“well it was a wonderful to meet you, truly! our diamond here, y/n l/n!” screams and shouts directed your way came in full force as you waved at caesar and blew kisses to all. as you walked back you bumped into someone.

“y/n right?” the boy from three, theo.

you nodded and stuck your hand out, “nice to meet you!” he looked down at your hand and back up at you before laughing, “very formal, i like it. i’m theo, your dress is nice but i think the girl wearing it is breathtaking.” you giggled before tucking your hair behind your ear.

finnick stood with the other mentors and held himself back from shoving haymitch out the way to get him to stop rambling on. his grip on his glass was solid, so it wasn’t a surprise when it shattered. “oh my!” effie yelled out as finnick apologised before someone came to clean it up. he stepped around the person before excusing himself to get to you.

you were laughing, hard. what in panem was so funny?

you were wiping tears away from your eyes as finnick joined the two of you, his hand on your back as theo nodded at him, “finnick.” he hated him. why the hell did theo speak as if he knew him personally? his smug face was unbelievably irritating. “finnick! how’d i do?” and the second you spoke he felt the anger dissipate, he adored the way you waited for his response as if it held all the answers.

“you did well.” finnicks answer felt snippy and made you feel as if you’d done something wrong. “we should get going.” he directed you away from the boy as you shouted out, “i’ll see you around!”

the entire elevator ride was, to put it lightly, awkward. it left you feeling confined in what little space you and finnick had. “finn? are you okay?” you placed your hand on his arm and stood in-front of him. you were hoping he’d explain what was wrong but what you didn’t expect was to be pushed against the side of the elevator and finnick kissing you. his hand was on your waist again and he shuffled your dress up, slithering underneath.

you moaned in his mouth, his hands playing and gripping at your ass. in reaction, your fingers thread through his hair and your grip tightened, “finn- not here.” the elevator was glass and you were scared of people seeing. finnick found it hard to care, drunk off your perfume. in a panic, you pulled away from him, your hands cradling his face to make him listen. “i’ve… never,” the whisper hung over the both of you, the tension in the air thick and hot.

instead of being met with judgment, he murmured, “i’ll make it good for you, i promise.” finnick had finally gotten a taste, and he could only crave more. his lips met your neck, his warm tongue painting wet desire into your skin. it was almost too much for little old you, letting out quiet whimpers as he explored you. his sleeves were rolled and you needed to ground yourself, your nails dug into his veiny arms. “finn-” you protested but he could tell you didn’t want to. just a little longer and he could get you to give in. “just let me feel you.”

the elevator stopping brought the two of you back as you fixed your dress and finnick fixed his own hair, running his hands through it. he directed you out of the elevator and nodded in acknowledgment to the people entering. as you walked onto your floor you were met with servants, stylists and others. it seems damian and analise had taken it upon themselves to invite some friends and you were eager to meet them.

whereas finnick wanted to rip your dress off and take you till the morning.

the same dainty hands which were running all over him were shaking others and waving as you all sat down to eat. as everyone feasted away you couldn’t help but play with your own meal. you were flushed and all you wanted was to kiss finnick again. he was sitting next to you and wasn’t hungry for food, he wanted to eat something else.

your dress didn’t hide much of your chest and when you reclined in your seat, crossing your arms and pushing up your breasts?

finnick needed to see more.

the clattering of his fork on the floor drew the attention of some, but they went back to their conversations and bets. “i’ll get it for you.” you pushed back your seat and got down to your knees, flicking up the tables sheet and searched around for it before hitting cold metal. you reached your hand out with the fork to finnick. his cock was throbbing at the image of you on the floor, chest on display and a sweet smile on your face. he bent down and grinned, “you look good on your knees sweetheart.”

his words went straight down between your legs and your mouth fell open at his words.

such vulgar words from such a beautiful man.

his hand came down to close your jaw. you felt, weird. as you sat back on your chair you felt warm? but a good warm? it was tantalising. you wondered if it was normal.

finnick would tell you right?

“finnick.” his head turned your way, “what is it y/n?” you leaned closer and so did he, your hands cupped around his ear, “i feel weird.” his eyebrows shot up as a sign of interest, “oh? what’s wrong honey? where do you feel weird?” you gulped, your throat felt dry and for some reason it felt dirty to talk about.

your eyes drifted downwards and as you looked up finnicks eyes seemed darker. “here?” his touch was soft on your thigh underneath the table as you gasped.

“everything all right dear?” sarah questioned as you nodded. it felt so good, his touch. but it wasn’t exactly where needed, his hand trailed closer and higher, until it was gone. your head snapped up at him as he smirked at you, mocking you.

for the rest of the night he didn’t even pay attention to you. and you had no clue why.

you couldn’t sleep after the day you had and all your mind was thinking of was finnick. finnicks hands, his arms, his mouth, his words.

“i don’t bite, unless you want me to.”

“yes, here.”

“i’ll make it so good for you.”

“just let me feel you.”

“you look good on your knees sweetheart.”

your room was too quiet, making it unchallenging for your thoughts to run wild at the anticipation of finnick odair. you couldn’t bear it, so you left to the busiest room you could think of.

your leg was shaking up and down and your mind was pacing whilst your body couldn’t. the butterflies were practically knocking around in your stomach and you hoped perhaps finnick could help. he’d help you right? but he didn’t before. maybe he was just tired? you were so desperate for help and answers that you’d forgone knocking and walked right in.

only to be met with an extremely wet finnick odair.

by your luck your eyes were probably poking out of your head at the sight of him, you couldn’t help but stare. it was your first time being in the same room as a man so, naked? for the lack of a better word, he still had a very short towel wrapped around his bottom half. was it small? or did he make it look small?

“see something you like sweetie?” god his voice was so saccharine, how the hell did his voice work you up? “i- i wanted to t-talk.” and you were stuttering, great! he walked closer to you and you stepped back, all the way into his wall. “yeah? does my pretty girl wanna talk?” you nodded along dumbly as your breath quickened. “words sweetie, use your words.” you swallowed, “yes.”

his thumb caressed your cheek before brushing along your lips, “you sure you just want to talk?” and there they were, the butterflies. you shook your head, “no? what do you want?” you played with your night dress, “you?” it was a soft murmur and finnick wanted you to beg. he’d been pining after you since the second he saw you, it’s only fair right?

“where do you want me?” his words were hot in your ear, his body was wet and your white night dress was suddenly see through. his hand rested on your ass, “here?” you shook your head, “no?” his thumb brushed over your nipple as your nails pressed into his neck, pulling him into yours. your breath was heavy and he was unrelenting.

his hand moved from your ass to cup your front as you gasped, “here?” you nodding along dumbly, “please finnick, i’ve been wanting you for the whole day, i’ll be good for you i promise.” your words were music to his ears, “yeah? you’re gonna be good f’me?”

“yes, yes, yes.” you whined as you wrapped your arms around his neck. standing on your tiptoes as you bit your lip. “you gonna let me use you yeah? do whatever i want?” you were practically jumping up and down at this point, your tits with you. your straps were pushed down as your dress fell down to the floor. his cock was throbbing at the sight of you, he’d been waiting for this.

“then on your knees honey.” you were quick to obey as he pushed you down to the cold floor, his towel quickly ripped off, courtesy of you.

it was your first time doing anything sexual so any cock was bound to be big in your eyes. finnick loved the sight of you on your knees, innocent as ever. fully nude, hands slotted nicely between your thighs. he wanted to ruin you. he ran his hand along his dick, pumping it before resting the tip on your lips.

as if you were on auto-control, your lips parted to let him through. a salty taste flooded through your mouth as he cooed down at you.

“you’re doing so well for me.”

“pretty baby on her knees, who knew you’d be such a slut?”

your eyes flickered up at him as you moved your head forwards on your own accord. “fuck.” he groaned as you replaced his hands with yours.

he wanted to go easy on you.

but kitten licks at the tip and soft kisses weren’t doing it for him. you opened your mouth again, gaining confidence and feeding off of finnicks praises. his large hand placed on the back of your head, fingers spread out as he thrusted down your throat.

the sounds that filled his room were lewd. squelches and groans as you tried your best to keep going. your cheeks hollowed out as finnick guided you, “relax your throat, try breathe through your nose. if it’s too much just tap my thigh sweetie.”

you retracted, catching your breath as you gazed up at him whilst simultaneously blinking away the tears in your eyes but a few fell free. he couldn’t help but moan. your messy mouth mixed with your saliva and his pre-cum. “you think theo’s this big? you think he could make you choke on his dick?” you shook your head immediately.

his member felt cold without the warmth of your mouth, but he was feeling nice so he let you take a break. “too big for you sweetie?” you shook your head furiously, “naw is my baby tough?” you giggled as you wrapped your lips around him again, your tongue flat against the underside of his dick as he eased himself in. “ah- fuck.”

but he can only hold out for so long as he began to fasten his pace, chasing his high. your fingers dug into his thighs right under his ass, for some reason you seemed to have something to prove as you took him all the way. your moans egged him on as his hips thrust forwards, “so good f’me, my s-sweet girl.” his praises fueled you on as your nose met his naval. salty tears fell down your cheeks and finnick was in his right mind to lick them all up.

god you were better than he’d imagined. and trust him, he’d imagined a lot.

“swallow for me yeah? be a good girl and open wide.” thick cum coated your tongue as you gladly accepted. finnick proudly gazed upon your painted face. watery eyes, sticky face. all for him. you gulped it down before wiping off the remaining waste on your face, eyeing finnick up before licking it off your fingers.

“what happened to the diamond? only a whore for me right?” your fingers were wet as you pulled them out. “uh-huh.” your agreed as he pulled you up. “do you even know what that means?” he teased as you puckered your lips before shaking your head. “thought so, you wanna be good for me?” you nodded, “on the bed baby.”

you sat down on the bed as you waited for finnick to join you. he situated himself between your legs, running his hands along them. “lean back for me. you took me so well, you want me to make you feel good too?” your eyes widened at the idea, “yes please finn.” his hands reached up and rested under your breasts, “i don’t know if you’ve earned it honey.” your lips twisted into a slight frown, your waterline glazing over.

“i was! i did what you asked finn, please.”

he palmed your breast, massaging it softly as you threw your head back, “please. please keep going.” your begging was more than enough for him, his baby asked so nicely no?

“yeah? you like me playing with you?” incoherent babbles fell from your lips as finnicks mouth kissed your breast. his hand trailed down to feel you, and he was met with warm wetness. the moan you let out was ungodly, “finnick please! oh god it feels so- so good.” he couldn’t help admire you, eyes screwed shut, hands clutching the pristine white sheets.

“oh baby, can you be quiet for me? quiet for finn?” a string of ‘uh-huhs’ came from your mouth as finnick slid a finger into you, a tight fit. “oh my god!” you yelped before slamming your hand over your mouth. he was knuckle deep as he worked his finger in before curling it, then another, then another. his free hand was pushing your hips down into the mattress as your hips lifted upwards with every move he made.

“finnick, finnick. you feel so good.” you cried out as he retracted his fingers before curling them upwards. he knew exactly what to do, where to be, what to say. his name fell from your lips like a prayer and your nails raked down his back as he grunted.

now, finnicks fingers were one thing, but his mouth?

his tongue pressed against your clit and you swear you saw god, finnick was probably the god. his tongue flicked over your clit as his fingers entered your cunt again, the pressure in your stomach was building so high you were afraid of the fall.

a wave of pleasure fell over you as finnick talked you through it, “that’s it baby, let go.” he hovered over you as his fingers worked your cunt. your nails had bloodied his back, scratched raw. as you moved your fingers finnick hissed into your ear. “m’ sorry, m’ so so sorry.” your head was spinning and you wanted to rest, but apparently finnick had other ideas as he lowered himself to your core. your mind was hazy as your hand clutched the pillow your head laid on, the other twisted in his hair.

“what’re you doing?” finnicks green eyes pierced through you as he raised his head from in between your thighs. featherlight kisses trailed upwards to your pussy as your thighs twitched and closed around his head, still sensitive as ever. “just want a taste, clean you up.” he mumbled as he tongue breached your entrance and you were back where you were before.

this man was driven youd give him that.

“finn s’ too much, please.” your words were slurred as he delved inside. he couldn’t find it in himself to let up, you were so sweet, he just wanted a taste. so he kept going, his tongue, his hands, his words. if there was one thing you knew about finnick it was that he could talk anyone into anything. so you found yourself squirming underneath his strong arms, forearm pinning you down to the bed as he made your back arch and your toes curl.

“sweet baby, so sweet.” all attempts of getting away, only caused him to get annoyed with you, can’t you just lay down and let him ruin you? at this point it was for his pleasure rather than yours. your thighs were practically squeezing his head and neck but he kept going. you didn’t know where to put your hands, pulling his hair was no good. your hand somehow ended up on your clit, moving in a circular motion as the other palmed your breast.

each time he made you come you rested your head, energy depleted. but again he ended up between your legs and pathetic pleas from you did nothing to make him stop.

“wanna make you feel good.”

“just one more, you can take it sweetheart.”

when your fourth rolled around you were so far gone. “pretty baby, not a single thought up there huh?” you couldn’t even bring yourself to respond, and he didn’t expect you to. he brushed away the stray hairs from your face and kissed you passionately. “you did so well f’me honey. made me proud, you got one more in you for me?” it wasn’t a question, his dick was painfully hard and he only knew of one solution.

you tiredly shook your head, “no more finny.” he grinned, “no? you don’t want my cock?” your breath hitched at his words and you knew you were fucked. “mhm. want it.” you were reduced to one to two words in a sentence.

“yeah you do. on your knees baby.” you tiredly rolled over, situating yourself on your knees and the palms of your hands as finnick kneaded your ass. his hands grazed over the skin before-

smack!

“think you should be able to see yourself baby.” his hand yanked at your hair as you found your reflection glaring back at you. “so pretty, aren’t you?” finnick knew you were horrible at accepting compliments and he was more than happy to use it against you.

smack!

you’d taken too long to answer, but based on finnicks smug expression you could tell he was hoping for it. “you have to answer baby.” finnicks arm came across your waist, pulling you up, flush with his chest as his hands pawed at your chest.

“you wanna be my baby yeah?” you could only manage moans and finnick was not happy. he threw you forwards as you caught yourself with your hands infront of you.

smack!

“fucked you so good you can’t even talk.” he taunted you as he dragged his cock in between your drenched folds. finnicks groans were deep, and so hot. “you know how long i wanted to fuck you baby? in that short skirt on the train? when you licked up that cream? my girls dirty huh?” you didn’t respond and it only fuelled his fire, he’d wanted you for so long and now you had the audacity to ignore him?

he thrusted into you without warning and you screamed out. “want to act like a slut? i’ll treat you like one. fuck!” your walls were squeezing down on him, sucking him in and he was more than happy to oblige. his hips snapped against your ass as you gripped onto the sheets for dear life. his grip on your hips bruised, leaving a fiery impression in their wake. finnick had stamina for days, he was strong and built. you were small and fragile, finnick was glad to be the one to break you in.

he pulled you up to him again as he kissed you frantically, capturing your bottom lip in between his teeth. he was relentless in his pursuit for his high, he marked up any place he could as he continued to drive into you with determination.

“bet you dreamed of this, of me.” his hand gripped your throat, his eyes bore into your own, finnick was inescapable. every touch, every thrust, all him. you were enveloped in his being and he worshipped yours. finnick continued to pound into you harshly, cock gliding easily against your inner walls. he was deep inside but he wanted to be deeper. “yes! yes! harder!” you cried out.

his hand pressed down onto your stomach, “feel that?” his breath was prominent by your ear, “oh god!” you exclaimed, it felt as if you were filled to the brim as he bottomed out in you. thick, hot cum released into you as his and your moans were raising in pitch and his hips began to stutter.

the room was filled with the sound of slapping skin, the promise of silence forgotten. “let go baby, you’re close. let go.” the two of you had eachother and it was more than enough. his groans were deep and animalistic as he spilled himself inside you. your hand reached behind you to caress his neck. thank yous spilled out from you, your whole being was ignited, you never knew you could feel so good.

the two of you lied together, entangled in sheets and a mess of limbs. you couldn’t tell where finnick odair began and y/n l/n started. all you knew was that he was yours, and you were his.

you’d fallen asleep a bit ago, your chest rising and falling steadily. finnicks arm curled around you as you rested on his chest. from the moonlight spilling into his room he could view the bruises tattering your smooth skin. as he traced over them he couldn’t help but grin, he could imagine you limping in the arena.

you sure as hell weren’t forgetting him anytime soon.

[sisterslvt]

big sis coming home from her minimum wage, shitty kitchen job, collapsing onto the couch with relief, only to have her lil sis come out from her room, way past her bedtime, asking to cuddle

annoyed, but trying to be a good sister, she says she needs to shower, she’s sweaty and probably smells like fry oil

“and? i don’t mind, i think you smell just fine”, and with that, plops onto big sis’ lap, legs intertwining and arms crossed behind big sis’ head before she can object any more

“okay, you win” she chuckles as she embraces her little sister

as she holds her, little sister nestles her face into her big sister’s neck. “so warm”, she whispers, not realizing big sis’ reaction, biting her lip, trying to push out the intrusive thoughts

“it’s okay, i’m not a bad person”, she silently reassures herself. “she doesn’t know any better” just then, she can feel her sister’s lips grazing her neck

“hey, hehe, what are you doing?” she nervously croaks. “nothing, silly, just relax” big sis’ eyes wander, her sister’s thighs pressed against her own, her supple skin so inviti- she tries to ignore the pounding thoughts and her growing discomfort in her jeans

“big sis, i love you so much, don’t be mad okay?” “huh? why would i be m-” little sister’s lips meet flesh, purposefully, her hand now wandering to brace her big sis’ neck. little sis lets out a moan “-ad?” another moan, this time from big sis’ own mouth

“i want you to feel good, just let me do this for you, okay?” big sis, trying and failing to fight her urges melts towards her sister’s lips, finally reaching her destination. as they pull away, a quick look into each other’s eyes tells little sis that she can surprise her big sis properly.

she swings her legs so she’s straddling her now, ready to make the next move. “do you wanna see me naked?” big sis’ eyes dart around the room, knowing but making sure they’re alone. “only if we can both be naked”

little sister’s eyes light up and she nods excitedly as she begins to strip her big sis down. a flurry of clothes and movement later, little sis is on her knees, in between her big sister’s legs

“i think i saw this in a movie one time, even though mom covered my eyes, i could still see. do you want me to put my mouth on you?” big sis nods, her cock throbbing at the thought. as her little sister’s mouth wraps around her, she can’t hold back, forcing herself as deep as she can bracing her sister’s head with her hands

lil sis would be smiling if she could muster it, but the best she could do was stare up at her big sister as her hips bucked into her. she could barely breathe, but her sister’s face was just so pretty as she moaned between a string of “fuck”s and “you feel so good”s

as lil sis drifted into ecstasy at the thought of her big sister using her like she had fantasized for so long about, her thoughts were interrupted as her mouth was freed and she was lifted onto the couch her other holes now in full view

“lil sis, i wanted this for so long. you always looked like a perfect little fucktoy for me, so now just please let me use you” before she could even respond with an “of course”, big sis’ cock was buried in her pussy, which had been dripping in anticipation. instead, all she could utter was a whimper as big sis pushed her head down and desperately humped against her

“fuck, i shouldn’t be doing this, i shouldn’t even be thinking about this, but your ass is always peeking out of your shorts, i know you wanted this” little sis wanted to say more but all she could get out between thrusts was “yesyesyes, fuuuckk meee”

as big sis’ pace picked up, they both knew what was coming. “you better not tell anyone about this, okay you little slut?” “mm-hmmm” she whined back. big sis bottomed out in her sister as she released all of the pent up stress of the day into her…oh god, she just came in her little sister. she pulled out, her mind no longer hazy with needing to get off and instead left with dread of what might happen next

“i’m so sorry, i shouldn’t have done that…fuck, please don’t tell anyone, we shouldn’t have let that happen”

little sis, blissed out beyond belief just turned around to face her sister, her cheeks now flushed with embarrassment

“i’m glad you came in me, we should do that more often”

big sister’s face lit up, finally excited for what the future held

[love-of-the-red-star]

That time I got reincarnated as an Aeon

(Series)

Chapter five: Discovery Channel (In which you find out you have fans)

Warnings: Idk sort of Hi3 lore spoilers? Void Archives is his own warning

Why the hell did you even bother to think you could fix the absolute red flag that’s the divine key sitting on the chair next to your bed?

The more the Kirschtaria look alike spoke, the more you were convinced he should have been booted off the train. Too bad you couldn’t let your intrusive thoughts win in the meantime— Welt doesn’t know just how worse this guy could get, shared goal be damned.

“Okay so uhh, you were with Welt to fight a bunch of people in the sky right?” You said, trying to go along with whatever the fuck he was saying— it wasn’t like you didn’t know what they were doing beforehand, but it was easier to pretend you didn’t know shit.

“Yes, and we were in luck because Himeko had saved us.” He said, smiling. For a moment you would have been utterly bamboozled but you knew better.

You thanked your new brain that functioned as fast as a supercomputer, because you knew everyone in this train would be dead meat if you were slow.

“I see… that’s good to know she managed to get to you in the nick of time then.” You told him with a light hearted laugh, you swore that the more he looked at you, the more suspicious he became. If you were going to kick this man off the train it would have to be a vote of majority, but since he wasn’t acting up just yet you were going to postpone that meeting.

He was still on your watchlist, though.

Void Archives opened a bottle of expensive looking whiskey and poured it on a cup, and then another, and handed one to you.

“A toast.” He said, but you heard “An offering of friendship”. It was at least good to know he knew he shouldn’t fuck around with you.

You accepted the glass, drank it and grimaced.

“Not a fan I see.” He shook his head as if to mourn your lack of taste in the finer things in life. But what would he know? He’s a cube.

“I don’t like it, but I can drink it.” The taste of the whiskey burned in your throat. “Tastes a little funny though.” You murmured, Void Archives didn’t react much to your statement and continued to drink til he emptied the bottle.

It took him an hour, but at least the empty bottle signified he overstayed his welcome in your room.

“Let us meet again tomorrow morning, I want to speak with you soon.” He told you before he left.

Good grief, what a creep.

———————————

You never did end up speaking to him, instead heading towards Welt Yang, who you want to vaguely warn.

“I know you knew Void longer than you know me,” you began, but you already know Welt was more likely to believe you than the cube. “But keep an eye on him, he gives me a bad feeling.” Plant the seed of doubt, slowly but surely, so that the damage to the express can be minimized.

“I’ll.. keep that in mind.” Welt inhaled, stiffly nodding at your words as you patted him on the back.

“Great! Also, if things come down to it, you have my say in kicking him off this train.” You grinned, waving before disintegrating into particles as you returned to your original body.

Famous last words to be spoken.

Because five years later, on a Christmas Eve of all occasions, shit happened. And Void Archives was booted off the train like the red Amogus on a community vote.

Was it chaotic? Yes. Was it like a court hearing than an actual community vote? Also yes.

You had plenty of evidence presented, including the first instance you invited him to your room— because what do you know, the whiskey he gave you was drugged.

He did plenty of horrible shit, and even Himeko, poor patient Himeko, had enough.

You felt a little bad for Welt though having to deal with the aftermath, needless to say, everyone, except you, needed therapy on that train.

On the upside, someone better did replace the blonde and that was Dan Heng who joined you a few weeks before Void Archives was booted off the express.

“Well,” you blinked. “That was something.” You said out loud as Dan Heng shook his head. “Sorry you had to meet that guy.”

Dan Heng brushed it off, instead focusing on staring at the Christmas dinner that Pompom prepared for everyone and poked the turkey on his plate with a fork, before properly digging in.

It wasn’t exactly an ideal way to start your holidays and welcoming someone in the crew properly in a celebration, but you supposed it’d have to do.

It was at least one less toxic bitch off the train.

——————

You didn’t expect you’d deal with your own information being displayed in the databank though. Dan Heng wasn’t creepy about it at least, not that he knew you were an Aeon— specifically, the Aeon that ate Akivili (you still feel bad about that).

“Libertas, huh.” You let out a snort as you read your own little book. In there, it was written on how you were discovered, and what you stood for, along with a group that eventually became your followers.

You hummed, thinking it was rather endearing to see the Avgin there as some of your believers. It was interesting on how you got a following, no matter how small, in the few decades you existed in this world.

It wasn’t just the Avgin, there were others who you did not know too who believed in you, and others who you did see when you had peered into planets to see what people were up to.

It was sweet in a way, for them to cling to you for belief as they sought true happiness in the way of freeing themselves and others.

You wanted to keep it that way.

You read into the pages more, finding out what kind of worship people dedicated to your path; there was a statue of you in one city in some planet hundreds of light years away, in another planet there was you in a tapestry, in another you had a statue and a painting inside of a massive church akin to the ones you saw in photos of Rome.

It was a little overwhelming, and you felt a little shy at the recent discovery of all of this.

You closed the book and put it back on its shelf, exiting Dan Heng’s room to ask Pompom for tea after helping them with their chores.

—————————

Unbeknownst to you, Dan Heng knew you were an Aeon— and an Aeon he believed in in some way when he had heard of you in the whispers of the guards in the recent years he’s stayed in the Shackling Prison. It wasn’t exactly difficult to piece things together with the context clues around the place, not to mention, Himeko did end up telling him.

You wouldn’t be angry about it, she said to him. You were apparently rather human-like, and kind.

Himeko wasn’t wrong, and Dan Heng was going to trust that judgement. Is he wary? Yes, you’re an Aeon after all, you were plenty big of a deal.

But Pompom didn’t seem to be scared of you, and Welt spoke to you with a sense of respect. You regarded everyone in this train with a certain familiarity— Dan Heng did feel like you were a bit strange due to the feeling of “uncanny valley” you gave him, but you were kind to him and you were welcoming.

He was welcome in this place, he had a place to stay, and a purpose, as meager as it was.

Dan Heng thinks things would be alright from now on.

————————

Part I, Part II, Part III, Part IV, Part V, Part VI (HERE), Part VII, Part VIII

Yeeeee this took a bit!!! Thanks for the wait yall, I know it’s calm rn, but it’ll get rowdy again at some point I promise.

[revelboo]

Everything is Alright Pt 14

Soundwave x Reader- company

• It’s almost maddening, the chaos in that little, organic head of yours. The hurt and frustration that he can’t shut out. While Soundwave doesn’t know exactly what happened that night, he’d felt the immediate shift in you. And it’s worse now as he lets himself into Starscream’s quarters, those intrusive thoughts snaring him. Exhausting him. Wounding.

• His gift, his curse, makes it impossible to not know when something’s wrong. Mostly, he just needs to know if whatever storm is brewing is just a little squall or a hurricane. This isn’t anything major. He shouldn’t care. You’re Starscream’s pet. Or maybe project? Who knew, but the SIC isn’t faring much better. And he’s taking his frustration and anger out on everyone he can. Which is a problem for morale.

• You don’t bother looking up as Soundwave enters and approaches the desk. He lays a single servo on top of your head before shifting it to ever so carefully bop you on the nose, somehow not breaking it in the process. You still jerk back in surprise, eyes narrowing as you stare up at his visor, your own scowling, unkempt self glaring back in the reflection. Oh. Do you really look that rough? Turning your back on him so you won’t give in to the urge to use his visor as a mirror and try to finger comb your hair, you stiffen when he picks you up and sets you on the floor.

• And you can’t help but look at his huge peds. Starscream always keeps you trapped up high, sure, but it’s also safe from accidentally being stepped on. You bite into the inside of your cheek to keep from pleading to be put back. Down is good. You can try to escape if you’re not stuck on his desk. That’s what you want. Right? You’re not entirely sure and you hate it.

• “Eject,” Soundwave says from above you, that chest compartment he’s put you in before opening so huge cassettes can be launched out. Mouth falling open as they transform before hitting the ground, you stare at four smaller Decepticons. They’re still much bigger than you, but they can’t step on you at least. And he just carries them in his chest? You’re not sure why weird alien stuff still throws you at this point. Two look like bipedal robots like Starscream and Soundwave. One seems to be a big bird, an image it reinforces by tilting its head to stare at you. The other appears to be a panther. Looming over you and these new Decepticons, Soundwave holds up a single servo. “Behave.”

• What? He’s leaving you with them? Apparently so as he strides for the door and you just gape after him, protests catching in your throat. “You are tiny. Breakable.” A hand grips your arm, lifting it and you spin in alarm. Because the breakable comment has made your stomach lurch sickeningly. Soundwave wouldn’t have just ditched you with these mechs if they’re going to hurt you. Right? The purple one is frowning at you as he compares your hand with his own. You’re only able to yank out of his grip because he lets you and you’re well aware of that fact. “So, what do you for fun around here?” He asks, grinning down at you while you flounder.

• Your boring lack of fun doesn’t really impress them. Frenzy, Rumble, Ravage, and Lazerbeak aren’t interested in hiding in Starscream’s quarters or doodling on the data pad. So you find yourself dragged out into the halls. Literally. Frenzy pulls you along by the arm in their wake and no amount of struggling or digging your feet in is stopping him. If anything, he finds your panic funny. “I don’t think I’m supposed to be out here,” you say, reluctantly giving up your pointless struggle since it feels like you’re going to dislocate your arm long before he gets tired of dragging you. There’s no winning.

• “Definitely not,” Ravage mutters, glaring at you when you stare, because he can talk. Why it surprises you after everything, you’re not sure, but it does. Maybe your brain is finally starting to reach its ‘nope’ limit. And that limit is talking mecha panthers.

• You’re so distracted you almost miss the huge, bright green Decepticon rounding a corner for all of three seconds. Then you’re trying to hide behind Frenzy as its head tips down and it sees your little group. Its lip curls to flash denta and a foot lifts in a very obvious threat to squish you. “How’d that thing get in here? Don’t you know how fast they multiply?”

• “Stick it up your tailpipe, Scrapper,” Frenzy snarls, his seeming indifference for the fact that while he’s bigger than you, he’s still absolutely able to be stepped-on sized to the other Decepticons. He either really isn’t worried about retaliation or he’s just that dumb and you’re not sure which. The distinction seems very important, though. “You really think a human just wandered in? It’s supposed to be here.”

• And you’re being dragged past the big mech, who looks uncertain. Surely it’s not that easy? Frenzy tugs on your arm and you stumble forward, his hand pushing you forward so you’re in front of him and behind Rumble. Maybe he is worried then, you crane your neck to stare at the big Decepticon as it stares back in perplexed silence. “Don’t run, but walk faster. Even if he’s not the smartest Constructicon, he’s likely to scrape up enough processing power to wonder why a human is supposed to be here,” Ravage hisses softly and you’re hurried along deeper into the Decepticon base. Previous Next

Did I go watch TFO a third time this past weekend because it’s amazing? Yeah, I did. Go watch it. It’s just this gorgeous love letter to G1.

[deuxadeux-if]

WELCOME TO DEUX À DEUX.

THIS GAME IS ON INDEFINITE HIATUS.

Hi all, I’m Ray, and this is the official Tumblr of the WIP interactive fiction game “Deux à Deux."

This post contains:

Socials

Current Demo Status & Patreon Status

Short Synopsis

Long(er) Synopsis

About the Game (ROs and a basic “things to do” summary)

Content Warnings

Demo

***The game is planned to have some mature content, so 18+ only from here on out, please :-) ***

Socials: Pinterest | Spotify | COG Forum | Patreon

Demo & Prologue Status (10/05/2024):

| Public Demo |

Prologue is available. You should also see an ending page which allows you to restart/share game, you should have a stats screen, and you should have 4 save slots.

| Patreon |

Prologue is available. R Burns POV #1 (for prologue scene) is available for free & paid members on Patreon. Erin Pinsky Diary #1 and T Lyons POV #1 are available to Obsession tier on Patreon. Two free drabbles are on Patreon (you can find them here, too, though).

Short Synopsis:

You’re barely scraping by your dead-end job when a couple leaves a note as they leave: “Quit your job—we’ll take care of you.” Calling the number on the note throws you headfirst into a world of luxury, intrigue, power, and lust. Tread lightly.

Long(er) Synopsis:

As a server at a self-proclaimed “upscale” restaurant in New York City, most of your shifts end with exhaustion, total rage, or vague annoyance. When a beautiful couple leaves you a note with their receipt (instructing you to quit your job and let them “take care” of you), along with a $500 tip, you’re intrigued.

You don’t expect much from the note, but it quickly becomes obvious that you’ve caught the Lyonses attention. They’re persistent as they are mysterious, but you soon realize there’s a dark underbelly to their glamorous, luxurious lifestyle. Whether you stay in it or not is up to you.

Will you become part of (or break up) the Lyons couple, or will you find another path with their permanent “house guest”? Maybe you’ll be the fourth piece in their puzzle. You could stay at your crappy serving job and get closer with one of two coworkers, to the horror of the Lyonses—or maybe even your boxing coach.

Whatever happens, it won’t come easy.

About the Game:

-----------------------------ROs---------------------------

T Lyons.

T (Tom/Tess/Tory) Lyons is wealthy, mysterious, and cold. They’re married to N Lyons, and the two of them are the very picture of a New York City “power couple."

T takes an immediate liking to you when they meet you at La Table (the restaurant you work at). Their interest is what sweeps you into the Lyonses life, into their own luxurious, illicit, private world.

Appearance: T Lyons is American and black. They have black hair, sharp lips, and cold brown eyes.

N Lyons.

N (Noah/Natasha/Nico) Lyons is T’s devoted spouse, and is in turns alluring and terrifying. N is apprehensive to have you join their world, despite their immediate interest in you, because the Lyonses only ever have one “house guest” at once.

N Lyons will be a little harder to win over, but they may prove a more loyal ally. You also wonder how much they pull the strings of the Lyonses’ lives behind the scenes. Only time will tell.

Appearance: N Lyons is Mexican-American and brown. They have very dark brown hair, long eyelashes, and calculating black eyes.

M Nguyen.

M (Mason/Molly/Mars) Nguyen is the current house guest of the Lyonses, and you immediately wonder if they find you an unwelcome intrusion or a possible savior.

M is more reserved than either of the Lyonses, but then again, they don’t have much to talk about. They don’t leave the house much, but they want for nothing under the Lyonses care. You just wonder if they’re in a gilded cage, or truly satisfied.

Appearance: M Nguyen is Vietnamese-American and tan. They have black hair, angular cheekbones, and thoughtful black eyes.

R Burns.

R (Ronnie/Roxanne/Rainn) Burns is one of your closest almost-friends in your “real life.” They’re your boxing coach, the best around, and you consider them mostly (or completely) to thank for your combat skills.

You’re always entertained with R, but you’re torn between deciding if there’s real care beneath the easy amusement on the surface. Do you want to get closer to R, or leave them in the dust?

Appearance: R Burns is Punjabi-American and brown. They have black hair, a prominent nose, and dark brown eyes.

Erin Pinsky.

Erin Pinsky (genderlocked) is your almost-almost-codependent coworker. She’s a very talented server, always lighthearted and charming … if you cared more about your job, you might be jealous.

She seems to really like you, too. The question is, is that affection only surface-level, or could there be something more there?

Appearance: Erin Pinsky is American and white. She has poorly bleached hair, always-on black eyeliner, and bright brown eyes.

Theo Ferreira.

Theo Ferreira (genderlocked) is another of your coworkers, but you can’t really tell if he thinks anything about you … like, at all. He doesn’t really give a shit about La Table or his job, so he’s more stern than charming as a server.

For some reason, the customers eat this up. Sometimes he’ll sneak you stolen food from the back and insist you bring it home, but otherwise he’s pretty quiet. Still, he’s very handsome.

Appearance: Theo Ferreira is Brazilian-American and brown. He has buzzed brown hair, expressive eyebrows (though he hates this), and shrewd black eyes.

----------------------THINGS TO DO---------------------

In Deux à Deux, you can romance several people at once (whether there will be consequences or not is anyone’s guess … mwahaha) or devote yourself to one RO. You can also date nobody, I guess, but that will be a lot less fun in this game, sorry!

You can throw yourself wholeheartedly into life with the Lyonses, including going clubbing, eating fine dining, going on impromptu vacations, etc.

You can also reject their frivolous lifestyle entirely, avoiding them when you can (although they’re quite persistent) and spend time boxing, hanging with your coworkers, or trying to get M out of the Lyonses lives.

Or, if you’re feeling ambitious, you can try to balance both.

This game will have:

Romance (duh)

Stat checks with consequences (there will be 2-3 majorly game-defining stat checks, so choose wisely)

Combat (everyone has a few skeletons in their closets, right?)

A fair bit of drama.

Content Warnings:

These will be updated more as I continue writing and completely solidify things, but this is a start.

Combat: knives, guns, street fighting

Violence: blood, bruising, unconsciousness

Stalking (not by ROs or MC)

Swearing/cursing (your MC can choose not to curse, though!)

Sexually suggestive content

Sexually explicit content (can opt out via “fade-to-black”)

NOTE: there is no sexual violence or allusions to it, EVER. There is no human/sex trafficking or allusions to it, EVER.

The Demo:

Link: https://dashingdon.com/go/17086 OR click here.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thank you so much for your interest in my game!! So excited to continue sharing this with you all.

XO

Ray

[pullupinarari]

I wouldn’t choose to blame it on you [LH]

author's note: me posting fics at 1 am, what's new 🤧 I still have A LOT of doubts about this one, but I decided to post it so you could be the ones deciding if it's shit or not 😃 anyway, hope yall enjoy this! mwah

warnings: there are mentions of a car crash and a coma in this one!!

• masterlist

wc: 8478 - english is not my first language! feedback is always appreciated

Life hasn’t been easy for you lately. You’ve been struggling with some problems at work, leading to your mental health deteriorating alongside it. All the stress, the sleepless nights, are taking a toll on you, ruining your good moods and patience. Your body runs on anxiety most of the time now, making you snap more easily over small things that don’t justify it at all. 

At the same time, Lewis has also been struggling: with his work, with his mind sometimes. Things have been going downhill for him at Mercedes, and you know he feels the pressure - from the team, the fans, and especially from himself. He too has been going through a good amount of sleepless nights, tossing and turning in the bed, his mind running to find a solution for all the problems surrounding his car, trying to understand what is wrong with it, why this season feels like it’s cursed for him. 

You know all of this, you witness everything from the front row - and you try your hardest to be there for him, to comfort him and to support him, in the exact same way that Lewis does for you, no matter what.

But Lewis is definitely much more patient, calm and thoughtful than you are - most of the time, at least. He always has the time to listen to you, and even if he has to run, he finds a way to allow you to vent to him, so he can assure you that everything will be okay. 

However, he has his bad days as well. And today was just one of those days. Lewis was stressed already before the race, groaning and huffing in his drivers room while he was putting on his racing suit. Qualification didn’t go well yesterday, he was going to start the race in a shitty place once again, and just the thought of it devastates him. You know Lewis thinks about his career a lot - he can’t help but compare his golden years to the races that he has been having lately, and he wonders what kind of legacy he will leave behind after all this. 

It consumes him, you know it does. He doesn’t know what he is doing wrong, what he can do to improve, if the problem is really in the car or if he had just forgotten how to drive it, out of nowhere. The intrusive thoughts are stronger than him, and this weekend, he is definitely letting them win and take over his mind. 

But something doesn’t sit right with you. You don’t know what it is, you just know that you have an agitated sensation inside of you, a feeling of disquietness - the type that feels suffocating, like someone is stepping on your chest and never letting go.

“I don’t feel right about today” - you share with Lewis, your voice sounding calm and quiet, just barely above a whisper, undecided about whether you should acknowledge this emotion or not. 

For some reason, Lewis doesn’t want to hear it, so the loud sigh that leaves his mouth is enough to make your body contort in your seat. “Can you just shut up for a single minute, please?” - he asks, his voice sounding tired and done - with the weekend, with everything that’s happening, with you. 

He has had enough sleepless nights, he can’t even begin to explain the rollercoaster of emotions that’s been running through his own body for the past couple of months, and he just can’t do it today. He can’t, for the life of him, listen to another hour of you pouring all your sorrows out for him to absorb them, to add them to his own frustrations, to try and deal with every single one of them at the same time. Lewis has enough on his plate already, and he’s tired of you using him as a deposit for your own sentiments. 

“What has gotten into you?!” - you question, maybe in a too defensive tone, looking at his figure with furrowed eyebrows. The environment surrounding both of you already feels heavier, when Lewis gives you a moment of silence, before digesting your question. 

He turns to look at you, his eyes focused on yours, with a serious expression painting his face. “Y/N, I am genuinely so fucking exhausted. You’re not the only one suffering, you know? You see every single day all the shit that I have to pull through, and still, you don’t give me a minute to breathe! I know you’re going through your own shit as well, but fucking hell! The only thing you do now is complain about every single thing and it’s starting to get annoying!” - he blows up in your face, raising his voice even without noticing it, but his words enter your ears, echoing in your insides, and never leaving your body. 

“I am also by your side whenever you need me! You’re being so fucking unfair right now. Because I am the one that actually stays by your side every single weekend, while you aren’t even near me most of the time when I need you” - you spat back, the venom in your words hitting him where it hurts the most. You know how much he blames himself when he has to leave you alone, when work gets in the way of your marriage, when his mind is already toxic enough to make him wonder if he is still a good husband for you, after all that’s happened lately. 

“It’s not my fault that my job demands that I have to travel so much! You know I don’t feel good about all this either! But I am about to get into my car and here you are, complaining about your feelings, instead of trying to support me for a bit. I need you too, you know?” - he sighs again, noticing his body tensing incredibly hard now, making him feel like his muscles are starting to hurt already. 

“Everything I do seems to annoy you, apparently. I annoy you when I cry, I annoy you when I complain, I annoy you when I fucking speak. So maybe it’s just better for me to shut my fucking mouth, and you might as well just pretend that I’m not here, like I don’t exist. You do that quite a lot lately already” - you reply, your voice sounding quiet now, the hurt in your words sounding so clear. 

But Lewis didn’t want to argue in the first place, he has more important things to focus on right now. So he grabs his helmet and his gloves, turning his back to you as he heads for the door. “Yeah, go ahead and leave. That’s all you know how to do, anyway” - you tell him, insisting on screaming harsh words to him, the blood in your veins feeling like it’s boiling now. 

“For fucks sake” - are the last words leaving his mouth, and you notice how he rolls his eyes before slamming the door shut. Once you are left alone in his room, it’s like the sound of your screams still echo through the walls, reverberating in your body. 

You feel so angry, so mad at him, at the way he talked to you, the harmful things he said to your face - you felt like you had to give him a taste of his own venom, erupting in such a tense fight. Your body feels tense as well, you have a knot forming in your throat, your chest is rising deeply and fast, your breathing feels erratic due to how nervous you feel now. You bury your body deeper on your chair, allowing you some minutes to breathe, to try and calm down, and that’s when tears start flowing out of your eyes, finally allowing all the tension and the gut wrenching feelings that are flowing through your veins, set free now. 

When you reach Lewis’ garage, he is already inside his car, waiting for the signal to leave his spot. No good luck kiss, no encouragement words, not even a fist bump before he starts driving - nothing. None of your pre-race traditions were made. You make sure to hide yourself in the back of the garage, silently watching the beginning of the race, keeping all your attention on your husband’s movements - your eyes focusing on the screen in front of you, while your mind keeps going back to what happened in his driver’s room just 20 minutes ago. 

You can’t help but replay all the words he said to you, how insensitive he was, how he snapped on your face when you didn’t do anything wrong. Your facial expressions are closed, almost showing no emotion at all, while your body is physically hurting from all the emotions that you are trying to process.You take a deep breath, crossing your arms as you realize how angry you actually are, and how difficult this is going to be,forgiving him after everything he said. 

Your eyes keep following his car, lap after lap, turn after turn, and your brain isn’t processing anything that’s happening in front of you - you feel disconnected from the race, from the reality, it’s like your body is there, but your mind is somewhere else. 

The truth is that Lewis isn’t really paying attention to his surroundings either. He hates when this happens, when he has to race while feeling his blood boiling in his veins, his body feeling hot from all the anger reaching his skin. He is running on autopilot now, just making sure that his car stays inside the track limits, barely listening to any words that Bono keeps repeating on his radio, rarely replying to him. His mind is also thinking non-stop about the fight you two had before the race, he keeps wondering if you will have the courage to recognize your mistakes and actually apologize to him, since he doesn’t feel capable of apologizing anytime soon - he actually means every word he said, he needs you so badly and he feels like he is the one that always needs to be there to comfort you. Sometimes, it just needs to be the other way around. 

Only Lewis knows how badly he would kill to have a moment where he could lay on your lap, vent about his concerns, to allow himself to cry out all the emotions that he has been bottling up for the past months and that he never got a chance to release from his body. He wishes you would listen - actually listen to him, paying full attention to what he has to say. To see all the damage he’s been keeping inside, to cuddle him, to comfort him and to assure him that everything will be alright in the end, because he doesn’t seem to be able to see it now. 

It’s like your minds are connected through the same type of thoughts emerging in your brains, making your bodies turn off from reality. You feel like you only come back from diving into your deepest thoughts, when your eyes focus on the way Lewis is struggling to drive now, completely losing control of his car, crashing hard against the barrier at an insanely high speed.

Your heart immediately falls, an electric shock running through your entire body in a second, alerting all your senses as to what’s going on. Bono tries to talk to him over the radio, asking if he is okay, waiting to get an answer - but Lewis doesn’t respond. In the blink of an eye, everybody in the garage is rushing, trying to understand what happened, leaving their seats, some people running out and trying to reach him. 

Your body begins to shake as you keep staring at the image coming from the inside of his cockpit - his head is down, he isn’t moving, and there’s the bad feeling pooling in your chest once again: something is definitely wrong. 

You try to leave your spot, trying to leave his garage as well so you can see him with your own eyes, but as soon as you try to run, someone from the team immediately grabs your arms, not letting go of you, recognizing that the cries and screams leaving your body won’t help now - there’s specialized people that are ready to help him. 

The tears don’t stop streaming down your face now - and you almost didn’t even notice they had started falling already, but you can’t control them. It’s like your heart is speaking for you, your emotions taking advantage over your brain. Soon, people start hugging you, trying to calm down your state as they too try to analyze how the situation is looking.

“Let me go, please” - you plead, hiccuping while you try to get the words out of your mouth. “It’s my husband that’s in that car, please” - you look everyone in the eyes, one by one, trying to appeal to their own feelings now as you beg them to let you meet him. 

Soon, someone is reaching for the television in front of you, turning it off as you start to see his car surrounded by people now, trying to take him out of the vehicle. It all happens so fast, your brain doesn’t have the capacity to keep up with everything that is happening now - you just remember being rushed to another room, so you couldn’t see what was taking place just a few meters away from you. In a matter of minutes, Lewis was being rushed to the hospital, and that’s when his team broke the news to you, letting you know that he was unconscious and in need of serious medical attention as soon as possible. 

And now, here you are: sitting in the waiting room, with a tear stained face, feeling so empty that you can barely breathe at this point. You are still waiting for someone to give you some news about your husband, to tell you what happened to him. To be honest, you just want the doctors to tell you that he is okay, that he is awake and ready to see you - but it doesn’t look like that is going to happen anytime soon. 

Some tears keep drenching your features while you face the wall. You don’t feel like saying anything, you don’t feel like doing anything that doesn’t lead to you seeing your husband. A million different emotions are traveling through your blood while you’re just holding on to the thought of him, now. 

Your brain replays everything that happened for the past couple of days, between the two of you. You really didn’t pay him all the attention that he deserved, that he desperately needed. You were selfish, focused on yourself, and you can’t even begin to explain how badly all your thoughts are weighing so heavily in your chest right now - it’s like you are holding the entire world on your back, with the inexplicable guilt of the last words you directed to Lewis: “go ahead and leave”. Your fists clench at the replay of that scene, feeling incredibly mad at yourself now. How could you say something like that to him? No matter how angry you could have been, you should have never told him something like that. 

You never wanted him to leave - of course you didn’t. You wanted him to stay, to calm down, to talk to you. But this time, you let the anger win, and your heart clenches at the thought of your husband crashing his car with those words lingering in his brain. 

The truth is, Lewis was also replaying the entire scene in his mind, not paying the slightest attention to the race. The grip he had around the steering wheel was incredibly tight, he also regretted what he told you - he realized that his words were unfair. You are trying your best, while still being there for him. He is the one that, sometimes, chooses not to open up, not to let his feelings show, he would rather just listen to your mind most of the time, so that he could avoid his own. 

Lewis’ phone rings, almost at the same time that yours starts ringing as well. You have both devices in your pockets and they’re both being flooded with calls and messages - your families, your friends saw what happened during the race. You understand that they are worried about Lewis, but the truth is, you too have no idea of what happened, or what's going on inside the emergency room. 

The time is passing by so slowly that you can feel each minute, each second touching your skin, giving it goosebumps while you find yourself praying for the best - you just want Lewis to get away with this, you want to look him in the eyes, to hear his voice. Even if he might still be angry at you, you don’t care - as long as he is alive and feeling okay. 

After what it felt like infinite hours, a doctor finally comes up to you. You immediately get up from your seat, asking how Lewis is. “Your husband has a mild concussion, nothing too serious, but he also has a broken shoulder, so we had to perform a simple surgery to correct it. While we were operating him, some bacteria spread through the wound, forming an infection. We tried to clean it as much as we could while in the operating room, but we decided to put him into a medically induced coma, so his body can spend all its energy fighting it, and we can control the infection better this way. He is out of danger for now, but we will keep a close eye on him” - the doctor explained to you in a calm voice. 

Your brain runs to collect all the information that was just thrown at you. “He is out of danger” - the words make your heart pump blood into your veins more calmly. But “for now” is the warning that makes all your internal sirens ring louder, afraid that something serious might happen to Lewis anytime now. 

You take a moment to call your in-laws, letting them know what you just heard from the doctor - in an attempt to help them calm down their clenching hearts as well. When you hang up the calls, a sweet nurse comes looking for you, letting you know that you are finally allowed to see your husband, to come inside the room he’s currently in. 

Your heart jumps out of your chest at her words, and your hands start to shake as you grab the door handle, taking a deep breath before opening it. As soon as your eyes land on your husband, the tears come back. He looks so fragile, lying in that hospital bed with a cast around his shoulder and arm, keeping it in place, resting on his stomach. You take a seat on a chair beside the bed, pulling it further forward, so you can be closer to Lewis. 

There’s a moment of silence lingering in the air, while you look at him - capturing all of him in your mind, each detail - recording it forever. Then, you gain the courage to take his hand in yours - you carefully caress his skin, noticing all the different IV’s that are connected to his body, each tube pumping a different substance into his blood.

He looks like he is just peacefully asleep, like he just came back home after a tiring weekend of racing, and he is just enjoying his time in bed, trying to get some rest - you’ve seen that image so many times already, it used to be one of your favorites, to see your husband at peace and giving his body a deserved break.

But then, your body lets out a sob, remembering why he is here, what happened at the race. You nestle his hand in yours, bringing it to your mouth to leave some kisses on his knuckles gently, while tears paint your features again. 

“Love” - you try to call him, only to no avail. His chest keeps rising up and down at a calm pace, truly like he is just in a deep sleep. You know he can’t answer you right now, but you can only hope that he will be able to hear you. 

“I don’t know if you know why you’re here, I don’t know how your brain feels after all this - the crash, the concussion, this whole coma situation” - you start to tell him, letting the tears fall free, not bothering to clean them up - nothing could make you lose touch with your husband again, so you keep caressing his hand with yours. 

“If you don’t remember what happened, I will tell you: it’s all my fault, Lew. This is all my fault” - your words sound muffled as your cries get more intense. There’s a hole in your chest now, as if someone shot you and the bullet went through your entire core, ripping through all your feelings and who you are. “The guilt won’t die alone this time, because I’m carrying it all with me, and let me tell you, it weighs a ton. I never wanted our stupid fight to end up in a car crash, baby. I never wanted anything bad to happen to you” - you guarantee him, your emotions pouring into his body now. 

If Lewis could feel something in his body while being in a coma, you were pretty sure that he would feel how hot your hands are now - something that’s not normal to you, since he is the one who always needed to warm you up. He would definitely point that out. Your body feels warm due to your altered state, to the way your heart has kept racing in your chest since the moment you saw Lewis losing control of his car. 

“You were right. And I know that, if you were awake right now, you would say ‘of course I was’, but it’s true. You were right, I was selfish, self-centered. It's been a minute since I gave you all the attention that you deserved. I made it all about me. I was way too worried about stupid work related problems, and look at me now. You’re on a hospital bed, and I’m here, crying my eyes out while I carry all the guilt of the shit I told you before the crash” - you sniffle quietly, using your fingers to stroke his cheek gently now. “You know, when you left your garage, I couldn’t stop thinking about how hard it was going to be for me to forgive you after the things you said. But Jesus Christ, now I just want to forget about all that, I want to put it all behind my back - the only thing that matters to me is your well being. I don’t care about any stupid fights if it means that I get to have you with me, sleeping by my side, even annoying me sometimes” - you pause, trying to take a deep breath.

“And when I told you to leave, this isn’t what I meant, you know” - you try to lighten up the mood, but your humor doesn’t do it. Instead, you just cry harder, imagining what you would do if he actually never comes back from this state. “You need to hurry up and fight this fucking bacteria, because I need you back, Lew. I need you so much” - you lay your head on his hip now, quietly sobbing into the sheets while your hand is still holding his.

Your brain assembles a collection of moments that you’ve spent together for the last few years of your lives. Small, simple and happy moments that your husband gave you, the ones that you were the most thankful for: like the way his smile would look so bright and giddy in the middle of the night, while you two were sharing pillow talks. How his laugh would erupt, flowing from your ears to the rest of your body, his good mood always influencing yours, always being able to put a smile on your face. 

It’s like your body can feel his touch still lingering on your skin, from all the nights when he lulled you to sleep while his hand would gently caress your back, your head lying on his chest, calming you down once you would focus on his steady breathing. “I need you back, even if you are going to wake up and still be mad at me - fuck, you have even more reasons to be angry at me now. You’re in this hospital bed because of me” - the realization hits you, not knowing how Lewis is going to react to all this once he wakes up. “But it’s fine. Even if you’re still angry, even if you give me the silent treatment, or even if you want to give me a piece of your mind. As long as you wake up, I’m fine with all that. I just don’t want to have a fight like this one ever again, Lew. Never” - you wipe some tears that are now dripping down your chin, threatening to spill onto the bed sheets. 

“I love you so much, Lewis. I am sorry, I am so fucking sorry for all this. For making it all about myself, for the fight, for the mean words I’ve said to you, for the crash. I never meant to say such horrible things, especially before a race. I didn’t even get to give you one last kiss before you got inside the car” - your heart shrinks, hurting like hell, like someone ripped it out of your chest and stepped on it over and over again.

“And believe me when I say this, but I could die right here, right now, knowing that you are suffering, that you are going through all this, that your mind was so messed up after our fight that you couldn’t even focus on your driving and you put your life on the line. I would rather be the one suffering, going through all of this instead of you. I would give you my life just so I could hear one of your belly laughs again” - your throat hurts from crying so hard, from the knot you feel around it, choking on your own emotions, making your mind feel like a sponge, a cloud with no ability to let go of the horrible images that you saw earlier. Your life doesn’t make sense without Lewis, and the thought of losing him destroys you completely. 

You make sure to stay by his side, sitting on that damn chair, next to his bed, for as long as it's needed - for as long as Lewis needs you. Your body feels electric due to all the anxiety pooling through it, and ever since the second that you saw his car crash, you feel like you have a difficult time breathing properly. You don’t even know what to do with yourself, so you just spend the entire time touching him, making sure that he is still there, his body so close yet so far from yours. You can't help but caress his face or arm even in the middle of the night, due to how hard it is for you to fall asleep - your brain keeps replaying the images from the accident inevitably. Somehow, you always end up falling asleep on your seat, your head down on the mattress in front of you, your fingers always gently intertwined with your husband’s - the only source of comfort you can find. 

Every morning, you wake up to the sound of the nurses walking inside the room, to check on Lewis’ levels, to change his medication, to retouch his IV’s. 

The nice ladies try to comfort you as much as they can, reassuring you that Lewis is making progress, that he will be okay, the doctors will bring him out of the coma in no time. But they also care about you, and they try to convince you to go home for a couple of hours, to take a warm bath, to sleep on a comfortable bed for a bit, instead of falling asleep on a chair. But you could never do that - what if Lewis decides to wake up for a moment when you’re not by his side? You don’t want him to immediately think that you abandoned him, that you didn’t care enough to stay after that stupid fight. 

It’s been five days since the accident. Everything is the same. The doctor says that Lewis is getting better, but the progress isn’t significant enough for them to take him out of his coma. For the past couple of days, you’re not the only one sleeping at the hospital - Lewis’ parents are there, as well as his best friends. The people that are closest to you and Lewis made sure to create this string of hope and love to wrap you two in, while also protecting you from the media and all the chaos surrounding it - feeding themselves off Lewis’ crash like vultures. 

Anthony, your father in law, actually cares about you as if you were his daughter, and he knows that you will listen to him. His hand goes to your shoulder, patting it gently as he sees your exhausted face, still looking at Lewis’ features, focusing on every little detail of him that you love so much. Your hand is still intertwined with his, like they’re glued together at this point. 

“Y/N, darling, why don’t you get up from this chair and go back home to take a nice shower and eat a warm meal? Hm?” - he says in a calm voice, the fatherly tone evident. 

You are quick to shake your head and you see the way that he nose contorts at your answer. “What if he wakes up?” - you wonder, some tears showing up on the corners of your eyes already. 

Anthony sighs, crouching down so he is eye level with you. “If he wakes up, you have my word that I will tell him about how you have never left this room in nearly a week now. Come on, sleeping on a chair and showering here with cold water isn’t right. You need some rest as well. We need to take care of ourselves now if we want to be capable of taking care of Lewis once he wakes up” - he tells you, and you know that he is right. The way you can barely keep your eyes open now, the terrible pain searing your back has been enough of an alarm, you’re just too stubborn to give in. 

With a small sigh, you decide to get up, landing a gentle yet long kiss on your husband’s forehead, touching the top of his head for a second before heading home. When your feet step outside the hospital for the first time in a week, the wind blows in your face, pulling your hair back, while the warm sun hits your figure, warming you up instantly. There’s a light breeze in the air, making you feel like it’s getting easier to breathe now, reminding you that there’s still so much to live - like a sign that everything will be alright. 

You drive home, thinking about the mess that your emotions are in. You can’t help but feel the remorse from leaving the hospital, even if you’re just heading home for like an hour, but there’s also a side of you that lets you know that maybe you need to let go of all that guilt, the negative thoughts that continue to consume you and look at this with new eyes, with light and hope in your heart. 

Your body surely can’t deny that the way the warm water hitting your skin does feel like the cure to all your problems, especially for the terrible back pain endured from sleeping on a chair for five days in a row. After your bath, you lay in bed, feeling sleepy, so you decide to take a nap, holding Lewis’ pillow next to you - it still smells like him, and that alone is enough to make tears swell in your eyes again, missing him terribly. But “everything is going to be fine” - you think to yourself, convincing your brain that the love of your life will be back home very soon. 

You can feel yourself drifting off to sleep in a matter of minutes, it’s like you’re being dragged by a wave, in the middle of the ocean - like you’re floating and you are as light as a feather, like the guilt you once felt, doesn’t weigh anything at all now.

As soon as you close your eyes, there’s only one thing in your mind: Lewis. At first, you start dreaming about lying beside him, cradling him in your arms and showering him in the purest form of love that you could ever give him - trying to make up for everything. You can see his face, his big smile, the one that’s so wide that makes his eyes look small in his face and that it could light up an entire room - it, for sure, is enough to light up your entire life. 

But then, it’s like your mind switches a button, and it creates a potential scenario of what can happen at the hospital, once Lewis wakes up. He doesn’t have a happy expression on his face when his eyes find yours. Instead, he is furious at you, and he makes sure to voice it. “You’re guilty about all this”, “this happened to me because of you”, the words echo in your head while you toss and turn on the bed, trying to escape your own mind now. You are covered in sweat, chills are running through your body while the nightmare persists, watching how Lewis is the one sending you away now, ordering you to get out of his hospital bedroom, making sure that he never has to see you again. 

Once you are finally able to open your eyes, you immediately get up, changing your clothes as you run back to the hospital - praying that your nightmare wasn’t a sign, that Lewis isn’t actually awake and really mad at you. It’s like you’re flying, trying to get there as soon as possible, and once you do, you let out a breath when you realize that nothing happened - he is still in his deep sleep, and you try your best not to show your altered state to anyone, going to grab a coffee from the vending machine. 

“You know you’re very transparent, right?” - Anthony’s voice sounds behind you, startling you from your thoughts. You look at him, furrowing your brows as if you have no idea of what he is talking about. 

“You need to let go of that guilt, kid” - he tells you, grabbing a coffee for himself as well, while trying to advise you the best he can. “The car crash wasn’t your fault. Stop holding that grudge so close to yourself.”

“But we had a fight-” - you try to explain. 

“I know, Y/N. You’ve told us about it already. And I keep telling you, what happened in that car wasn’t your fault. You had a fight before the race, you were both hot headed, but accidents happen. They can even happen without a fight, even with good luck rituals and everything. They can always happen, and you know that” - he says while lifting an eyebrow at you, reminding you of Lewis’ facial expressions so much now.

“But this only happened because he was furious, you also know that. He wasn’t focused because his mind was somewhere else” - you frown, your nightmare feeling too real now, like it’s itching your skin, afraid of what might happen once your safe haven wakes up.

“It could happen to any of us. I can crash my car while thinking about my grocery shopping list. We need to focus on the fact that he keeps making progress, and is now almost out of danger. Don’t blame yourself, and don’t be afraid. I know my son, but so do you. I have no doubts that he will only want to see you once he wakes up” - the way he sounds so sure gives you some confidence as well, like he is helping you take that weight off your chest.

In the blink of an eye, another week passes by. The small group that stayed at the hospital started taking turns, so that everyone could get some time to go home while never leaving Lewis alone. It’s crazy how a hospital room can feel a little like home now. Friends and family have sent your husband cards, ‘get well soon’ balloons, his nephews made some adorable drawings for their uncle, sending him all the love and positive energies so he could get better even faster. So, now, the space has more color to it, feels cozier when you are all there, near him, praying for his recovery.

And each time you would come back to his room, you would make sure to tell him about everything you’ve seen on your way home - even about this stupid TV AD that you find so annoying and it keeps playing non stop on every channel. 

You never stop talking to him, even if there’s a chance that he can’t hear you - it brings you some peace to think that you are keeping him updated on each thing that’s been happening in his absence. “You are probably so tired of hearing me and my stupid stories, but I can keep cracking silly jokes as well if you’d like” - you giggle slightly as your fingers run through his features. It came to a point where you don’t cry anymore - you are really trying your hardest to fight your mind on this, and the positive updates that the doctor keeps giving you everyday on Lewis’ state of health helps a lot. 

“We consider that his current state is stable enough for us to start reducing his medication, which means that he is going to gradually come to himself. It’s safe to say that he can wake up anytime now” - the medical team informs you, and it’s like the clouds surrounding all your heads as a group are slowly, but surely, lifting, letting some rays of sun and hope in. 

It’s been two weeks since the accident, and the anticipation of Lewis being able to wake up anytime now makes none of you want to leave the hospital. Still, you try your best to stick to your plan of taking turns, and you make sure to be extra fast once it’s your turn to go home, dreading the thought of Lewis waking up while you’re away.

Today was just one of those times when you showered at the speed of light, running back to the hospital as fast as you could. You don’t know why, but you have this feeling about today - you can’t explain it, but the way you woke up with a sprinkle of anxiety pooling in your stomach since early in the morning, makes you believe that something is about to happen.

You try to prepare yourself, hoping that today will be the day when the love of your life will finally wake up, and you will be able to look into his chocolate eyes and melt into them like it was the first time. 

“Hello, my love. I’m back” - you announce when you walk inside the room again, kissing his forehead before sighing softly as you sit down beside his bed once again - a routine that you know all too well now. 

Your hand grabs his own like it usually happens, except for the fact that his arm is missing a lot of IV tubes now, feeling lighter and giving you more space to caress his skin with your fingers. “I just came back from home, I went there and took a nice shower - don’t worry, I don’t want to be all stinky once you wake up” - you smile softly at your own silly words. It’s incredible how you managed to regain your calm and patience during this situation, like there’s an angel on your shoulder, reassuring you that everything will, in fact, turn out alright. 

“What can I tell you now that I haven’t told you already, ehm…” - you think for a second. “Oh, Roscoe keeps growling at me whenever I enter our place and he notices that you’re not coming inside beside me, like you usually do. I think he knows that you’re not just away for work, it’s like he also can feel that something is wrong. He is more quiet than usual, with a sad expression on his face, it’s painful to watch actually. But he almost bite me this morning when I was preparing his food, so I think you already have problems to solve at home with your son once you're back” - you inform him, a glimpse of humor and lightness surrounding your voice as you pick some braids that were on the front of Lewis’ face. 

“Did Miles mess with your hair again? God damn, let me get these out of your face, I know they itch your nose sometimes” - you say as you carefully adjust his hair, paying extra attention while touching his head. 

As you loosen the grip that your hand has on his own, so you can use both of your hands to touch his hair, you feel a grip on your fingers - like Lewis is begging you not to leave his touch. You immediately freeze in place, your eyes widen and your mouth agape as you stand in place, not daring to move an inch.

And yet again, you feel his fingers gripping your hand. “Baby?” - you call, carefully looking at his features, trying to find more movement or signs coming from his body. You notice that his breathing is not sounding as peaceful as it used to, it’s becoming shallow and less regular now, like he is trying to wake up. 

You pay attention to him, not knowing what to do now. Your body can’t even bring you to move, to call a nurse or a doctor, you just stare at the small reactions that his body is giving you. You just move your other hand to carefully touch Lewis’ face, caressing his beard and cheek the way you know he loves so much - trying to get him to react even more to your touch. 

His hand is still grabbing yours, applying more bits of strength little by little. “Lew, love, I’m here” - you tell him, and slowly, his eyes start to open. Your heart starts running in your chest, the emotion of seeing your husband waking up now being too much to handle. Still, you try to keep your composure - even with tears flooding your eyes by the moment, he needs you more than ever now, and you need to be here for him. 

His eyes stare at you, shining a light of its own as he pays attention to every little detail on your face, like he has gone too long without seeing you - in fact, he has. 

“I’m going to call a doctor, okay love?” - you tell him, and you realize that he is trying to nod his head at you, slightly doing the movement. 

Once the medical team enters the room, they immediately rush to Lewis’ side, running a bunch of physical tests on him to check his current state. Soon, the doctor starts asking him questions. 

“Mr. Hamilton, can you hear me?” - the doctor asks, and you see Lewis nodding his head again, with a more fluid movement now. 

“Do you recall what happened?” - another question. You are watching all this from the corner of the room, where you keep quiet so as not to interrupt the doctors.

This time, you finally hear Lewis’ voice. “A crash…” - his voice sounds thick and deep, failing him a bit as if his throat is feeling dry. The fact that he still remembers the crash makes a lump form on your throat, not ready to hear him mentioning it right away.

You take a deep breath, watching how the team takes Lewis away from you, so they can run some more exams on him. Everybody is ecstatic to hear that he is finally awake, and you are too. You swear that you are. It’s just that you aren’t ready to talk about all of this again, but you know you have to. You don’t want to clog his brain with a bunch of information right away, but you want to, at least, apologize. 

So, when Lewis is back in his room, the whole group reunites to see him. He is immediately engulfed in love by his parents, who gently hug him. He is still a bit off, he feels slow and tired, but he is trying his best to process everything. 

The feeling of relief washing over you as you see your husband smiling again, talking to his family and friends is priceless, and the bright aura surrounding the room is unmatched. But now, you are behind everyone else, staying by yourself in a corner while everyone else gets their chance to talk to Lewis - you already had yours, you had the privilege to witness his awakening, so it’s only fair if you let the rest of the group enjoy their time with him as well. 

But after Lewis speaks to everyone, he turns his attention to you, his eyes scan the room, landing on you. He gives you a soft smile, while holding out his hand for you. “Come here”, he tells you, and your body automatically follows his voice.

You stand next to his bed, giving him a small smile as he pats the space beside him on the mattress, inviting you to sit down. You do, and his free hand immediately reaches to caress your cheek while you two stay silent, just looking each other in the eyes. 

“Can we get a minute alone, please?” - Lewis asks everyone else in the room, who complies with his question, leaving you two alone. 

You stay silent, not really knowing what to stay - nor where to start, but it seems like Lewis knows everything that he wants to tell you. 

“I missed you” - he smiles at you, his hand never leaving your features, softly touching your skin, almost as if to make sure that you are real. 

“I missed you too” - you reply, gently kissing his hand as he holds it near your lips. 

There’s another moment of silence lingering between your bodies, the type that scares you, afraid and insecure of what he might say next - capable of drowning your brain in your own anxiety now, and it’s like he can read your mind. 

“It wasn’t your fault” - is the only phrase leaving his mouth, making you furrow your eyebrows. You just shook your head quietly, not ready to talk about this, but denying his words. It really was your fault, you are sure that it was. 

“No, baby, it wasn’t. I wasn’t fair to you either, I was hot headed, the whole weekend had been a fiasco for me already - nothing good could’ve come out of it. I want you to stop blaming yourself for all this, this is all on me. I was the one hopping on that car knowing that I wasn’t in the right condition to race, I was the one not paying attention to my driving nor the car. I would never blame this on you, my love” - his words are slow, but concise, and you can only lean your head on his shoulder, while your sobs take advantage of you now. 

Lewis lets you vent, caressing your back softly while silencing your cries. 

“Shhh, it’s fine, baby. It’s okay. I am okay, we are okay” - he looks you in the eyes again, slowly moving his face to meet your lips with his own, reassuring you that, in fact, he doesn’t hold any grudge against you - like you feared so badly. 

“I love you, I’m sorry” - you tell him, and the look he gives you - of tenderness, happy to be able to hold you again, to talk to you, to make amends, says everything. 

“I love you even more. And I’m sorry as well, I was fucking stupid” - he pecks the tip of your nose, making you giggle slightly, thinking about how badly you missed him, and how you are lucky enough to be in his arms again. 

You stay by his side, gently touching the parts of his body that aren’t injured - being especially careful with his broken shoulder. 

“So, I need to have a conversation with our son, huh? Biting you while you were feeding him? Sounds ungrateful” - Lewis tells you, making you both laugh in unison. 

“He’s been acting so angry and moody that I fear that he might bite off your good shoulder” - you tell him with irony, making Lewis giggle even more - the sound erupting in your heart, making a garden of wild flowers grow inside of you, where all the butterflies that he gives you are safely kept. 

And a few days later, Lewis was finally released from the hospital, allowed to continue his treatments at home. The man couldn’t hold the excitement inside of him, feeling like a little kid on the way home, eager to see his four pawed son, and to finally sleep in your shared bed, where he can finally hold you close. 

That’s exactly what happens. Roscoe immediately melts into a puddle of pats and licks once he sees Lewis, who could spend hours on end just playing with his dog. After having lunch, you bring the dog to the bedroom with you, watching Lewis’ figure peacefully lying on the bed, waiting for you to join him. 

With Roscoe lying by his feet and your head gently nestled in his chest, Lewis can finally sigh contently, and you can too - the nightmare finally ended, after weeks of living a whirlwind of emotions. Now, your heart feels lighter than air again - a feeling that only Lewis can provide you with his love, security and protection. It’s time to walk into the light again, hand in hand with the love of your life, who couldn’t be happier to be back in his safe place. 

He knows that he is in great hands, knowing for sure that you will take such good care of him, like you always do - and he realizes that heaven is not a place above the sky, but instead, is the depth of this moment, the peace prevailing in his chest and mind, as he forgets all the chaos, grateful to be in the presence of his family. 

[jeonginsleftcheek]

The sun to me

Chapter II. Water drop.

pairing: hwang hyunjin x afab!reader

word count: 5.1k

chapter summary: you could say that destiny always has a way of bringing together the souls that need each other. hyunjin meets not one but two people who will change his life for good.

warnings: tw for brief and vague mention of depression and suicide

~ Masterlist for the series

~ next part

🤍 Snowdrop - hope and the ability to overcome challenges.

Deep breath in.

Hyunjin feels like his lungs are expanding, like a flower opening up its petals to receive the warmth of the sun.

It takes him a few seconds to even register the sounds of people who were aboard the ship with him, laughing, talking, walking further away from the pier.

Someone walks towards him and for a brief moment his chest constricts as he waits to be questioned, bothered and ogled at but the man passes him by, saying hello to one of the crew members.

Hyunjin exhales and starts walking towards the road, he needs to track down the location of the room he barely managed to find on the internet.

It was a hassle, getting to the owner of the little apartment, since it wasn't summer yet and the tourists haven't even started arriving. Not that many people even come to this island, which is exactly why Hyunjin chose to hide away on it.

He knows, hopes, no one here has heard about him. He hopes he can just be a regular guy and go about his day, reset his body and his mind.

Fishing out his phone out of his pocket as he stops walking, he frowns immediately upon seeing it blowing up with messages.

Good thing he put it on silent or he might've just let his intrusive thoughts win and chucked the godforsaken device right into the sea.

Hyunjin ignores all the little bubbles and notifications, opting to just find the address on google again.

The island is so small, so unknown, so irrelevant that even after finding the address information, it seems that gps has trouble finding him on the map.

It's like he literally fell off the face of Earth and for some reason, that brings him relief.

He stuffs his phone back in his pocket, he's gonna have to find someone to ask for directions.

He looks around, noticing everyone cleared away from the pier so he just follows the first street down.

It's eerily quiet, even on such a sunny, lively day, the sound of his suitcase being dragged breaking the beautiful peace of the island. All the houses are adorned with flower pots on their windows and balconies, colorful gardens inviting you in, mesmerizing like a flower is to a bee.

Hyunjin hopes he can find some kind of shop or cafe or anything with people in it, but all he comes across are a few cats sitting on a low roof and staring at him menacingly, as if asking 'what the hell are you doing here'.

He sighs in frustration, thinking he'll actually have to knock on someone's door and disturb their Friday afternoon peace.

Just when he's mentally prepared himself to knock on a stranger's door and potentially have them yell at him, his eyes light up.

There, on the corner, is a little flower shop like an oasis in a desert, promising safety and aid. Hyunjin speeds up towards it, the suitcase almost flipping behind him as it bumps against the uneven and cracked sidewalk.

It's time for your lunch break, the old clock on the wall reminds you together with your stomach, growling embarassingly loudly.

You're behind the counter, about to grab your bag and keys, when you hear footsteps approaching and the sound of suitcase wheels scraping against the stones before they come to a stop in front of the door.

"Um, hello?"- you hear a pleasant and curious voice ring out from the outside, you almost want to curse the person out because everyone on the island knows when lunch breaks happen, but judging by the suitcase and the unknown voice it must be someone who just arrived here for the first time.

"Hello, come in!"- you sense the apprehension and you walk around the counter, coming face to face with what you would describe as a man made of dreams.

Your breath gets stuck in your throat, and his reaction seems to be similar, as his eyes widen slowly to the point where he almost looks completely bamboozled as his lips part and he just stares.

Quickly shaking it off and putting on your customer service persona, you smile at the stranger.

"How can I help you?"- you ask and he swallows, closing his lips as he seems to snap out of whatever trance he fell in.

"I- um- I'm looking for this address. I booked a room here, but I can't seem to find it on google maps."- the stranger pulls his phone out and shows you the address and you nod.

"Oh, at Isaac's. It's not too far away from here, just keep going straight until you see a blue house, then go right and up the hill a little bit, you can't miss it since it's the biggest house on that street."- you explain.

"Oh, thank you! I thought I was gonna get lost."- he smiles a little and you chuckle, shaking your head. This seems to deepen the redness of the young man's cheeks.

"You can't get lost here. The island is so small, you can circle around it three times in one day and still have some daylight left. Plus, most of the time the internet doesn't even work so you can't rely on gps. If you need to make calls or such, you'd best stand on the pier and try to catch the signal."

"Oh, thank you for the tips. I'm actually relieved that there's no internet."- the man says, running a hand through his dark hair.

You quirk an eyebrow at him, your eyes running over his frame.

"That's a first. People usually complain about that."- you say, as you take in his expensive looking jewelry, the branded shirt hugging his lean but toned frame, jeans also probably more expensive than your entire wardrobe and the fancy sneakers on his feet.

"Then they've probably come to the wrong place."- he concludes with a small smile.

"Probably."- you agree, ready to end the chat even though literal eye candy was standing in front of you, you craved a warm meal more than anything else.

There was a moment of awkward silence as the handsome stranger sucked his bottom lip between his teeth, bringing your attention to it.

"Well, it's my lunch break, so... If I can't assist you with buying some flowers, I'd like to close up shop."- you say as politely as you can.

"Oh! Sure, sorry for taking up your time."- he looks apologetic as you round your counter to grab your things.

"It's okay, glad I could help."- you smile as the both of you make your way towards the exit.

"I'm Hyunjin, by the way."- he reaches his hand towards you just as you close the door.

"Y/n."- your hand slots into his and he shakes it, soft but firm.

"Nice to meet you, y/n."- something about the way your name rolls from his pillowy lips melts the ice built around your heart, gentle like the first snowdrop peeking it's head through the snow.

There's something different bubbling up inside Hyunjin, something he hasn't felt in a long time.

As he makes his way up the little hill towards the biggest house with faded yellow paint, chipped at some parts of the wall, his heart skips a few beats.

Maybe it's because he's been a bit out of shape lately, or maybe it's because of you.

You with your genuine smile, you with your curious eyes and with all the pretty flowers surrounding you.

The flowers that used to bring inspiration and comfort to Hyunjin, ones he painted so happily, his hand gliding easily across the once blank canvas, the colors all bleeding into one another, kissing and loving.

The feeling he forgot. The feeling of love. The feeling of home. The nostalgia that inevitably comes with it.

Hyunjin knocks on the big wooden door, and after a few moments he hears heavy footsteps and a voice calling out.

The door swings open and a man probably in his 60s stands in the frame with a friendly smile on his face.

His grey hair is neatly pulled back, the wrinkles on his face are proof of how many years he smiled and frowned. There's a sparkle in his eyes and a bright smile on his face, showing off perfectly white teeth that he probably had done.

He's dressed in a simple black turtleneck and grey pants, the only ornament on his body in the shape of a huge silver ring, a black tourmaline stone in the middle of it.

"Welcome, welcome! You must be Hyunjin. Come in, young man."- the man smiles wide, immediately helping Hyunjin with his suitcase and stepping aside so he could come in.

"My name is Isaac. But you probably already had that figured out."- the man waves his hand as if to dismiss what he just said. "Welcome to my humble abode, I hope your stay here is as cozy as can be."- Isaac says, leading Hyunjin through the lobby and towards the big carpeted wooden stairs.

The house looks old but well taken care of, everything is wiped clean and polished, each nook and cranny devoid of any dust and neglect.

Hyunjin can't help but notice the skillfully crafted wood on the handrail, as well as a few other sculptures carved out of wood, taking the shape of people with their head in their hands who are desperately crying, lovers holding onto each other where you can't even tell where one ends and the other starts, beautiful women with big breasts and tummies lying on their side, vunerable and goddess-like.

Isaac eyes Hyunjin carefully as he seems glued to all the works of art around him, probably forgetting that he should be settling into his room and eating something.

"What do you think, young man?"- Isaac asks, making Hyunjin jolt a little as he looks up for a second before the carved sculptures grab his attention again.

"Very beautiful pieces, there's so much detail in each and every one. They must be very expensive."- Hyunjin comments making the older man chuckle deeply.

"Yes, very expensive. Cost me a lot of time and patience. And then of course, there's the material. The actual wood."- Isaac crosses his arms on his chest and Hyunjin needs a few seconds before a lightbulb appears above his head.

"Oh... Oh, you made them. That's incredible, you're an artist."- Hyunjin smiles, somewhat chuckling ironically for the fact that he can't seem to escape that which he considers brought him to the state he's in right now. "I'm kind of an artist too."- he downplays whatever life he built, suddenly feeling too dumb and embarassed do act boisterous in front of Isaac.

"Let me see your hands."- Isaac says and Hyunjin doesn't question him, just reaches his hands towards the man and Isaac leans down a little, his lips pursed as he folds his hands behind his back, a quiet hum in the back of his throat.

"You're a painter."- Isaac concludes before lifting up.

"How did you know?"- Hyunjin's eyes widen just a little, his eyebrows lifting up and Isaac lets out a laugh.

"Your skin is too pristine for anything else. But your nails are stained a little."- Hyunjin brings his hands up, closer to his face, and stares as if he sees his own hands for the first time.

He never noticed the slight staining on his fingers, almost forgetting the fact that beyond all the expensive paintbrushes and tools, an artist's work comes from his hands and his heart.

Is his heart stained too?

"Which one calls to you the most?"- Isaac brings him out of his thoughts again with his warm and patient voice and Hyunjin follows his line of sight, landing his eyes on the beautiful wooden sculptures again.

Maybe if he was younger he'd choose the woman, her breasts full and supple, inviting him to lay his head on them, wrap his lips around the tender nipples.

Maybe if he wasn't so jaded, he'd choose the lovers because love is the greatest feeling of them all, love is what makes people climb the highest mountain peak, swim the deepest ocean, reach the furthest star.

But Hyunjin can't help but stare at the man sitting in despair, fingertips digging into his own forehead as if he wants to rip his face out, take his brain out and scream at it.

Isaac sees. He sees through Hyunjin, he was once like him. Caught in the web of self-hatred and nihilism, despising everything he once held so dearly in his heart.

"You must be hungry."- Isaac never comments on Hyunjin's silent choice and he's thankful for that.

"Actually, yes."- Hyunjin feels the emptiness in his stomach as soon as food is mentioned and he realizes he hasn't eaten anything since last night.

"Why don't you get settled in and I will heat up some dinner?"- Isaac suggests and Hyunjin quickly shakes his head.

"You don't need to do that for me, I'm sure you have other business to attend to."- Hyunjin says.

"Nonsense, I don't mind at all. Honestly, it gets a little lonely here before the tourists start coming in so it would be nice to have someone to talk to. Other than my sculptures, that is."- Isaac says with a chuckle.

"Alright, if it's no bother then."- Hyunjin nods, giving a small smile to the warm man.

"Your room is the last door on the right."- Isaac points towards the staircase.

"Thank you."

Isaac smiles, quickly turning on his heel and leaving, presumably to the kitchen.

Hyunjin makes his way upstairs, his suitcase in his hands, the floorboards look too old and sensitive to drag the harsh wheels on them so he opts to just keep carrying his suitcase to his room.

Every wall is adorned with framed wooden carvings, sculptures even bigger than the ones downstairs are sitting in the corners of the hall.

Hyunjin curiously eyes every single one of them, waiting for them to suddenly come alive and move.

He shakes his head quickly, opening the last door on the right.

A loud gasp escapes his lips as soon as he walks into the room. It's bigger than he thought it would be, decorated like the rest of the house, everything is carved out of wood and the works of art made from Isaac's hands have become a staple that Hyunjin's eyes are already getting used to.

Hyunjin lays his suitcase down next to the closet and his legs first take him to the big window, the curtains pulled back and neatly tied up on the sides of the window frame.

The view is breathtaking, being up on the hill allows him to see almost everything, the sea, the shore, the main square with a church and also part of the little flower shop that he was just inside a few minutes ago.

Hyunjin needs to snap a picture. He fishes out his camera and after adjusting it, he takes a few pictures of the beautiful view, zooming in on the flower shop for a second and seeing that the door is still closed and the lights are still off.

You must be on your lunch break as you said.

He looks around the room again, the huge bed looks inviting after traveling for hours but he needs to eat something first.

The room that's warm and lived in, the smell of varnished wood and cinnamon enveloping his senses, the lively art pieces around him, make for a big contrast to Hyunjin's modern apartment, cold steel, black leather, the smell of cleanliness, the perfection of it all, the paintings that he despises from the bottom of his soul.

The ones he made in a state of delirium because Charlie was pressuring him, because people want more, because he needs to meet the deadline, because he's obligated to do them.

A metallic taste spreads inside Hyunjin's mouth and it takes him a few seconds to realize he bit his lip so hard that he drew blood.

He curses under his breath, walking into the adjoining bathroom to wash his mouth and thoughts away.

Lunch break was something you loved to spend in your favorite restaurant unless it was tourist season.

Then, it would get too crowded for your liking so you'd just go back home and eat before re-opening your shop.

Everything is 2-3 minutes of walking distance, your shop and your home, and the restaurant that a young married couple owns.

"The usual?"- Bennet peeked his head from behind the kitchen wall, and you chuckled giving the man a thumbs up.

You took your book out of your bag and looked out the window before little giggles on your left caught your attention and you turn to see Luna, the owner's 6 year old daughter, staring at you with big shiny eyes and holding a makeshift daisy bouquet in her little hands.

"Oh, is that for me?"- you ask slowly, pointing at yourself.

She stares at your lips before giving a little nod and another giggle before she reaches the flowers towards you.

Your hand is placed on your chin, then reached towards her as you mouth a 'thank you'.

She smiles happily, her chubby cheeks rosy before she runs away to play.

Catherine is quick to catch up to the little girl, gently grabbing her shoulders before signing a 'be careful' to which the girl nods and mouths an 'okay'.

"Hey, y/n."- Catherine lets out a sigh and you chuckle.

"Is she giving you a hard time today?"- you ask as she puts your lemonade down on the table.

"Try yelling at a deaf child to watch out from a distance."- she shakes her head, a bead of sweet running down her forehead. "My whole life flashed before my eyes, but luckily it was Delmar and he managed to stop his car just in time."

"Heart attack inducing stuff."- you nod. "But everything ended well and I'm sure she'll be more careful now."

"I hope so too."- Catherine nods with a smile, before turning to go check on her daughter.

You sigh quietly, looking through the window again as you sip on your lemonade when suddenly, the face of the handsome stranger called Hyunjin appears in your mind.

There's something that flickers in your chest at the thought of his smile. Then it clicks.

He's probably the celebrity that Barbara talked about, he must be an actor or a singer with a face like that, you think.

You wonder why he would come here though.

Maybe he got sick of all the glitz and glitter that being famous brings. That's something you could never be, live in the spotlight like that, to be picked at and proded at like you were some kind of test subject, looked at like you were some kind of animal in a cage, existing to entertain other people.

"Here you go, y/n."- a plate is placed on your table, snapping you out of your thoughts.

"Oh, thank you."- you smile at Bennet, as the aroma of your favorite meal fills up your space, making your stomach growl again.

It's quiet as you start eating and as always you ask Catherine and Luna to join you, which they usually happily agree to unless there are customers to attend to.

Bennet whips up their favorites quickly and excuses himself because he has a kitchen to clean, as he says, while you learn a few new words that help you communicate with Luna.

The sounds of utensils clinking against plates fill up the room as Hyunjin and Isaac sit in his dining room. It's the most lavish room yet, the table they're eating on feels too precious to even be used so Hyunjin is extra careful with his meal.

The big chandelier hangs above their heads, the sunlight shining through the huge windows that reveal a balcony, reflects in the crystal pendants decorating the chandelier, creating little rainbows scattered around the room.

"My father made this table."- Isaac notices Hyunjin looking at it, as if he's deep in thought.

"It's really exquisite. I feel a little apprehensive using it as a regular dining table."- Hyunjin says and Isaac chuckles.

"We ate on it every day. And then my wife and son too."- Isaac says, the mood shifting suddenly as a sad smile spreads on his face.

"You have a son?"- Hyunjin asks, taking another bite of the meat.

"I had a son."- Isaac nods and Hyunjin feels bad that he pried.

"I'm sorry."- he didn't want to dig into someone's wound so he looked down at his plate, feeling remorseful for asking.

"It's okay, it's been years. He was probably around your age when he left us."- Isaac reminisces.

"Was he sick?"- Hyunjin asks, seeing that Isaac wanted to talk about his son, maybe it brought him some kind of comfort to keep the memory of him alive.

"He was... sad. Very sad. We tried everything. But nothing could light the spark in his eyes."- Isaac shivers with a sad smile.

"I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have asked anything."- Hyunjin quickly says, feeling embarassed for himself and sad for the kind man sitting across from him.

"No, it's okay, you didn't know."- Isaac shakes his head. "I like talking about my son. He was also great with woodwork. I learned from my father and he learned from me. Guess it runs in the family."- he nods with a small smile.

"If you'd like, I could teach you some woodworking too."- Isaac suggests before Hyunjin can say anything.

He can see the turmoil on Hyunjin's face, the cogs turning behind his eyes as he struggles with whether to love or hate that suggestion.

"I'll be in my studio later if you want to join me."- Isaac intervenes quickly, pointing to the hall.

"What was his name, if you don't mind me asking?"- Hyunjin asks after a few moments of silence, referring to Isaac's son.

"Leo."- Isaac says with a kind of pain in his voice.

Hyunjin finds those three letters etched into the windowsill in the room he booked, his fingertips tracing the chipped wood, realizing quickly that this room once belonged to him.

Hyunjin doesn't join Isaac in his studio, he can't bear to even think about painting or woodwork at this moment, all he wants is to feel free from the confines he created for himself.

After lunch, he took a much needed nap and then an even more needed warm shower. He walks out into the room with only a towel wrapped around his waist, using another one to dry his hair.

Being up on the hill probably caught some signal on his phone as it buzzes next to the bed. Hyunjin frowns, making his way to it and grabbing it.

Charlie. Of course.

In the heat of the moment, he doesn't think, he just chucks the phone on the bed and it bounces up and smacks into the closet and then lands down on the floor with a loud thud, the battery falling out.

"That oughta do it."- he says quietly, leaving the device where it landed.

Hyunjin gets dressed quickly, grabbing his backpack and camera before he makes his way downstairs. He glances shortly at the big door leading to Isaac's studio, something heavy weighing on his chest before he turns away and walks out of the house.

There's nothing like watching the sunset while sitting on the beach. The beautiful golden rays mixing with the orange and pink hues, reflecting on the water as the sun itself drowns in it.

You're sitting with your little diary in your hands, well one of many you have, one that still has empty pages you have to fill up.

Most of them consist of dried up flowers and even a few little sketches you did, sometimes you write something you found funny in it, sometimes you pour your soul out on the pages, your tears blurring your vision and smearing the ink of your pen.

Today, the page is blank but your mind isn't.

For some reason, it's filled with Hyunjin and you wish you were better at drawing people so that your hand could capture the face that was already etched in your brain even after you only saw him once.

A twig snaps behind you, and you quickly turn around, jolting a little.

He appears in your view like he was summoned, like he was there to help you see his face again so that you could maybe try to capture the beauty on paper.

"Oh..."- he also jolts a little like he got frightened by your presence. "Y/n, right?"- he licks his lips and swallows, as his feet come to a halt.

"Yeah."- you nod.

"Sorry if I scared you. Kinda scared myself too."- Hyunjin says with a timid smile, still keeping a good distance away from you.

"It's okay. Usually, no one comes here at this time so I was surprised."- you say and he slowly makes his way to you.

"Mind if I join you?"- he asks, almost timidly and you have to wonder what kind of celebrity is shy like that.

"Sure."- you nod and he comes closer, slowly sitting down on the rock next to yours.

"I decided to explore the island a little. And you were right, I saw everything in one evening."- he chuckles as he looks at you, then at the notebook in your hands curiously.

"Are you sure you saw everything? There are a few hidden spots here that only the locals know about."- you eye the camera in his hands.

Such pretty hands.

"Oh really? Is there a guide who could show me some of those hidden spots?"- he asks and you let out a small chuckle.

"Depends on how much you pay up."- you say and he looks at you before you start chuckling, making him chuckle too.

"I'm joking, of course. I mean, I'm free tomorrow if you want me to give you the real tour of the island."- you suggest, wiggling your eyebrows.

"I would love that."- Hyunjin nods, a smile spreading on his face that makes his eyes crinkle.

When was the last time he smiled like that?

Hyunjin lifts up his camera to snap a few pictures of the sunset and you can't help but look at his features more closely while he's distracted.

Beneath the smile and the obviously expensive attire, something inside him seems sad and tired, you can feel it meandering between your bodies.

"Is that a sketchbook?"- Hyunjin asks curiously, as you play with the cover of your notebook.

"Kind of. It's a sliver of my thoughts, if you will."- you say as you stare at it.

"Can I see?"- he asks and you look up at him, genuine interest painted on his face.

"Sure, I'll show you some sketches, just not the things I write."

"Yeah, of course, I don't want to invade your privacy."- he says and you nod, finding a page where you sketched a few tulips from different angles.

"Oh, that's really pretty. I like your shading."- Hyunjin leans in closer and you get a whiff of his shampoo that gets you feeling entranced for a moment.

"Ah, thank you. I'm not the best at drawing at all, it's just that I'm good with anything that has to do with flowers."- you smile, somewhat sadly, Hyunjin notices and something pulls him to you.

He wants to know everything, he wants to tell you everything.

But he's afraid.

He's afraid of revealing the truth, afraid of bursting the little bubble appearing around the two of you, he's frightened to open his soul up, only to find it was rotten, only to see you turn away.

Hyunjin is someone who believes, well, used to believe in love at first sight but that was before he destroyed everything gentle and pure inside him, creating another person out of the broken shards, a fake person, a disgusting and cold person who fades away into other darkened souls, lost in the abyss of eternal nothingness.

"You're an expert in your field. That's admirable."- Hyunjin manages to dig up anything that feels gentle, even for a split second.

"What about you? What is your field of expertise?"- you ask and Hyunjin dreads answering and talking about that which he despises right now.

"Art, I guess. Painting to be exact. I'm a painter?"

"You say that like you're unsure of it."- you give him an inquisitive smile.

"Sometimes you forget who you are and why you even do what you do. Sometimes, something you always knew and loved gets further away from you the more you try to reach out for it."- Hyunjin talks and you giggle, putting your notebook aside.

"Are you sure you're not a poet?"- you tease and Hyunjin chuckles nervously, his cheeks becoming rosy like the cotton candy clouds in the sunset before you.

"I'm better with colors than words, or at least I was."- he says, scratching his head as he purses his lips.

"You talk so nicely so I'm sure your art is even nicer."- you conclude.

It hasn't even been a day since he first laid his eyes upon you, but Hyunjin feels like you set his mind at ease with little effort, with just a few words and a sweet smile.

"Thank you."- he smiles. "I'll show you another time. I don't have my phone on me."- he adds.

"Looking forward to that."- you say. "And what you said earlier, I relate to it. Sometimes I feel like that with my flowers. But they're all I really know."- you shrug. "I always come back to them."

"Yeah, I find myself sitting in front of a blank canvas many times without even painting anything. I guess it's etched into my bones by now."

"Like part of your DNA."- you follow up and Hyunjin agrees.

"Is it okay if I take a picture of you?"- he asks after a few moments of comfortable silence.

The sun has almost completely immersed itself into the water and the last light of the day illuminates your facial features perfectly, the sparkle prominent in your eyes.

Hyunjin wants to capture what you talked about, how you looked and how you smiled at him and keep it in his heart forever.

"Sure."- you nod, chuckling a little.

You turn towards the sea, the last of the sun's rays reflecting off of the surface and almost hypnotizing you as you hear the click of the camera.

Hyunjin thinks this is the best picture he ever took.

And as he walks back to his current home, he feels like destiny intertwined her hands into his life, bringing the two of you together, like this is a start to something he can't even begin to fathom yet, like whatever he searched for, he found in you.

Maybe he just met you, but deep inside his wounded soul Hyunjin knows, you will become the most important person that touched his heart.

✨Taglist: @moonchild9350 @janepg @velvetmoonlght @hwanghyunjinismybae @jehhskz @laylasbunbunny @porangporangmeong @jeonginslefthand @sapphirewaves @simpforleeknaur @laughatdanger @lixies-favorite-cookie @linavc @quokkacidal @thisaintredwine @m00gyu @yaorzu-blog @skzfelixlove @tajannah-price1 @puccaaak @aft2rsexs @xxkissesforchanniexx @aprilmaejune77 @lilmeowneow @stayjinnie @astrobebba @danihwang882 @kaysungshine @nchhuhi @1810cl @chartrucewhore @babigriin @jisuperboard @alisonyus @minluvly

[niniluvsainz]

the alchemy ☽ gr63

taglist | masterlist | ttpd series masterlist

in which... she turned him into gold, the most prized possession of hers that he will never let go.

george russell x fem!reader

warnings... cursing

faceclaim... emilia mernes

author’s note… my first ttpd fic!! i’ve rushed through this for sure, but i just wanted to get something out! there will absolutely be more to come in the near future!

yourusername

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yourusername boy said "be my photographer i need pictures" yet he won't be my photographer

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georgerussell63 i have priorities

↪ yourusername SLEEPING ON THE COUCH!!!

user OMG STAWP THEYRE SO CUTE

user im so single bro

landonorris could've thrown him into the ocean while ur there

↪ yourusername believe me i wanted to. intrusive thoughts and all

user manifesting that gr63 win soon!!

lailahasanovic a beauty

↪ yourusername mwah love ya

georgerussell63

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georgerussell63 POLE IN CANADA! holy molyyy, giving it all tomorrow!!!

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yourusername YEAHHHHH

yourusername THATS WHAT IM FUCKING TALKING ABOUT

user GEORGE POLE THE WORLD HEALED

user HE DID THE POSE

user lfgggg

user team gr63 finna celebrate hard

user if george wins im shaving my head

↪ user holding u to that

yourusername added to their story!

↪ p3 for my man! that's how it's done, congrats georgerussell63 !! 🩵

f1gossipgirl

liked by 48,736 users

f1gossipgirl BIG NEWS! yourusername will be performing on june 23rd at lluis companys olympic stadium, the home stadium of fc barcelona! after a little over a month of being on break for her .mp3 tour, the singer returns to the stage! moreover, the concert will be the evening after the formula one race in barcelona, will we possibly see drivers there?

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user MOTHER IS BACK

user I MISSED Y/N ON STAGE

user I HOPE GEORGE WINS SO HE CAN CELEBRATE THERE

user WE'RE SO BACK

user omg for sure george, lando, and some of the wags will be there!

↪ user for sure pierre and kika, esteban and flavy, mick and lailah, and lily and alex!

yourusername

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yourusername BARCELONA! un honor cantar para ustedes! demasiadas gracias por venir, las vibras, el amor, todo se sintio! gracias por darle la bienvenida nuevamente al tour, nos vemos en la proxima parada! (such an honor to sing for you all! thank you all so much for showing up, the vibes, the love, everything was felt tonight! thank you for welcoming the tour once again, we will see each other at the next stop!)

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flavy.barla such. an. experience.

iamrebeccad you were amazing!!

landonorris heck yeah

georgerussell63 stunning, gorgeous, unbeatable, top of the charts, gorgeous

lilymhe I LOVE YOU YOU ROCKED THAT STAGE

f1gossipgirl

liked by 50,726 users

f1gossipgirl success!! y/n l/n's .mp3 tour kicked off again in barcelona, the show being attended by maximum capacity! as predicted before, a few of the f1 drivers attended their friend's concert! george russell was there supporting his girlfriend, as well as alex albon and lily muni he. later on, fans noticed drivers carlos sainz, lando norris, pierre gasly, esteban ocon, fernando alonso, and charles leclerc. the other wags who attended were rebecca donaldson, francisca gomes, flavy barla, and alexandra saint mleux. fc barcelona players pablo gavi, joao felix, pedro gonzalez were also seen at the concert.

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user she is the it girl

user GUYS I THINK PARENTS ARE ENGAGED

↪ user what the hello kitty pls explain

↪ user RUN TO TWITTER!!!

twitter!

replies;

↪ user OMG I THINK ITS HAPPENING PEOPLE

↪ user if they got engaged i'll shave my head

↪ user I DONT HAVE A CHANCE WITH EITHER OF THEM ANYMORE NOOO (im so happy for them your honor)

↪ user oh she absolutely is talking about her man

↪ user about time he put a ring on her finger !!!

yourusername and georgerussell63

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yourusername i think i'm getting married

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georgerussell63 I'M HER FUTURE HUSBAND!

georgerussell63 wait why do you think you're getting married, you ARE getting married to this handsome young fella right here

↪ yourusername uh huh sure

↪ georgerussell63 WHATS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN-

landonorris WHOOP WHOOP CONGRATS

maxverstappen1 congratulations to the future weds!

alex_albon i'm for sure being the best man

↪ lilymhe yourusername make me maid of honor

↪ yourusername wasn't thinking of anyone else, lils <3

↪ georgerussell63 i don't think i have a choice alex_albon

charles_leclerc WHOS GONNA PARTYYYYY

↪ alexandrasaintmleux excuse him, congratulations to you both!! so happy for you

carlossainz55 congrats!! why does y/n only have her reaction photo here?

↪ georgerussell63 i made no reaction.

↪ yourusername george was baby crying and strategically aligned the camera crew to not snap a shot in his direction

francisca.cgomes MY BABY IS GETTING MARRIED

↪ yourusername ILY KIKA

fernandoalo_oficial mi nina se casa!! (my girl is getting married)

↪ yourusername si, papa postizo (yes, adoptive father)

user YOURE FUCKING ENGAGED???

user OH MY GOD IM CRYING, PARENTS ARE GONNA BE MARRIED!!!!!

georgerussell63

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georgerussell63 you CAN win this!!

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user toto's radio message killed me

yourusername my handsome winner

yourusername WHERE'S THE TROPHY?

↪ lilymhe HE JUST CAME RUNNING OVER TO YOU

↪ alex_albon SO WHEN HE TOUCHED DOWN, CALL THE AMATEURS AND CUT EM FROM THE TEAM

↪ landonorris DITCH THE CLOWNS GET THE CROWN

↪ georgerussell63 BABY IM THE ONE TO BEAT

↪ yourusername CAUSE THE SIGN ON YOUR HEART SAID ITS STILL RESERVED FOR ME

↪ mercedesamgf1 HONESTLY, WHO ARE WE TO FIGHT THE ALCHEMY

user i love this friend group your honor

user GEORGE WON THIS SHIT

lewishamilton 🤛 🏆

yourusername

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yourusername YABADABADOOOO FIANCEE DID IT!! (featuring my live reaction to the last laps where i knew george was gonna win)

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iamrebeccad GODLY WOMAN!

↪ yourusername BECKSSSS <333

georgerussell63 fiancee seems to be very talented and handsome

↪ yourusername he very much is <3

lilymhe the most beautiful bride-to-be!!

↪ alexandrasaintmleux agreed <3

francisca.cgomes CAN YOU MARRY ME INSTEAD?

↪ pierregasly okay.

↪ yourusername look at 2022 world cup, baguette. who beats you there? ;)

↪ estebanocon DAMN HIT YOU THERE!

↪ estebanocon wait...

taglist: @ultraviolencesam @Topguncultleader @peachiicherries @lilyferrari16 @tpwkstiles @cherry-piee @marshmummy @khaylin27 @Stinkyjax

[holylulusworld]

Valentine reloaded

Summary: Your fiancé breaks your heart on Valentine’s Day out of all days.

Pairing: Mafia!Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader, former!(any male character) x fem!Reader

Warnings: angst, break-up, mentions/implied cheating, fluff, Bucky being the best, flirting

A different kind of Valentine

Bucky pulled the chair for you and whispered soothing words in your ear. He tried to help you forget about what happened earlier that day. “That’s my favorite restaurant, doll. I hope you like it.”

“Oh, I wanted to try it out for so long. But—” You sighed deeply and shook your head. “I like it already. The ambiance is nice, and I like the cute aprons the waitresses are wearing.”

“You have a good eye for details,” Bucky smirked at your flustered state. “Relax, doll. I won’t bite or eat you alive.”

“Maybe I’m into biting,” you retorted and mirrored his smirk. “You never know about people’s kinks until you end up in bed with them.”

Bucky laughed at your attitude. “I like you already.” He said and sat down to have a look at the menu. “What do you like?”

“I like it spicy, wild but with lots of kissing and gentle touches,” you grinned at Bucky. “OH! You meant the food.”

“You are something else,” Bucky snickered and dropped his eyes to the menu. He’d love to hear more about your preferences in the bedroom but decided against it. You were still hurting and tried to hide the pain another man caused with your cockiness. “I’d love to know everything about you.”

“I think you’d get bored, just like him if you knew everything about me,” you whispered. The light in your eyes and the smirk gone you tried to keep yourself together. “Sorry, I didn’t want to ruin your mood.”

“Doll, you are hurting,” Bucky grabbed your hand and squeezed it. “The man you loved broke your heart and left you for some other girl. You can be sad about it.”

“I don’t want to be sad,” suddenly aware that you are at a fancy restaurant, with a handsome and nice man you shook your head. “He doesn’t deserve a single tear. Whatever we had, he ruined it and I won’t let him win. Let’s eat.”

“Let’s eat, Y/N,” Bucky nodded and squeezed your hand before turning his attention back toward the menu. “I’ll go for meat tonight.”

“I knew you were into some meat,” you winked at Bucky and smirked again. “I’ll go for pasta.”

Bucky nodded and called for the waiter. You ordered your food and released one last sigh. This night should’ve been special for you and your now ex-fiancé. All you wanted was to make him happy. And now you realize, it should’ve been him trying to make you happy for once.

“What do you want for dessert?” Bucky asked, watching you with concern. You were lost in thoughts, and he tried to bring you out of your intrusive thoughts. 

“Can you recommend anything?” You asked and looked at Bucky, taking your time to drink his features in. Just now you recognized his eyes, bluer than the ocean you longed to see again for the longest time.

“Doll, you can order whatever your heart desires. My treat,” he softly said. “What do you like? I like the awfully sweet stuff.”

“Sweet,” you giggled. “Really? I thought you were more into the manly kind of dessert.”

“I’m man enough to admit that I like sweet desserts and to caress a woman. All these testosterone-driven wanna-be men are fake. A real man can admit his feelings and make sweet love to a woman.”

“You are laying on thick, huh?” You smiled at Bucky. “I like a man who can manhandle me but make sweet love afterward. The perfect combination of roughness and softness.”

“Y/N, you are making it hard for me to be a gentleman,” Bucky cleared his throat and tried to ignore the desire growing in his pants. He’d love to get to know you better before devouring you. 

“Well, you started this, Sir,” you pointed your finger at Bucky. “You cannot talk about your qualities and expect me to not fall for you.”

He chuckled at your words. “I’m warning you, Y/N. If you want me to, I’ll make you fall for me so hard you’ll not even recognize that I put a ring on your finger before you are walking down the aisle.”

“A shotgun wedding, then?” You challenged. “I bet you look even better in a smoking. Let me get a nice dress and we can ride into the sunset.”

“What will you do if I kidnap you and make you my wife?”

You shrugged. “What’s the worst thing that could happen to me? If you wanted to hurt me, you had more than one chance to do so.”

“You are tempting me, doll,” he laughed and tried to play it cool. Bucky was mesmerized by you the moment you slapped him with your clutch. No one ever dared to lay hands on James Buchanan Barnes. Everyone fears the ruthless mobster. “I can still kidnap you after dinner.”

“Good plan, Sir,” you winked at Bucky, feeling a weight get lifted off of your chest. Somehow being around this stranger, you just met helped you forget about your ex-fiancé and his betrayal. “I’m starving and can’t marry a man on an empty stomach.”

“A very good plan, Y/N,” he smiled at you. “Let’s make this dinner worth your time, sweetness.”

Dinner was pleasant. You ate, drank, and chatted with Bucky. Honestly, you didn’t have so much fun for the longest time. 

You soon find out that Bucky is easy to talk to. He never judged you or made a face when you ordered the most expensive and delicious dessert you ever ate.

He simply enjoyed your presence and the fact that he made you smile more than once.

When it was time to pay, he refused to let you pay a single buck. It was his pleasure to invite you. 

Bucky helped you into your jacket and held the door open for you. You walked next to him, feeling hope bloom in your chest when he suddenly grabbed your hand to hold it.

“That okay?” He murmured. “If not, just say it. I don’t want to overstep.”

“I overstepped by slapping you, Bucky,” you stopped in your tracks to look at him. “You didn’t deserve the slap, or to get yelled at. I’m sorry.”

“Doll, I’ll give you reason in the future to yell at me. Believe me, I’m no saint,” he grinned and wrapped you in a hug. “But I make up for it in the bedroom.”

“Bucky,” you slapped his chest and giggled. “Can we…do this again?” You asked. “I pay next time. I mean…can we go out together or have coffee?”

“We sure will, Y/N,” Bucky said and slung one arm around your shoulder. “Or we could just get married tonight.”

“You’re not funny,” you teased but leaned your head against his shoulder. “Thank you for tonight. You don’t even know me but tried to cheer me up.”

“All for a pretty and sweet dame like you,” he simply said and walked you toward his car. “I’ll drive you home, and make sure you sleep well. I won’t leave you alone tonight.”

Bucky kept his promise and settled on your couch. He knows how hard it is to get your heart broken by the person who should love you the most.

Even though he just met you, Bucky felt responsible for you. That his heart was beating a little too fast close to you didn’t help.

“Fuck,” you sniffled while walking back out of the bedroom, rubbing your tired eyes. “Sorry, I didn’t want to wake you.”

“Hey,” Bucky got up from the couch to wrap you in his arms when you started to cry again. “We agreed on not crying over that bastard. Didn’t we?”

You nodded against him. “Yeah.”

“What do you need me to do?”

“Can you hold me for a while?” You hid your face in his chest. “Please.”

“Of course, doll.” He softly replied. Bucky wanted to tell you that he would hold you for all your life if you allowed him to do so. “Let’s get you to bed. I won’t leave your side.”

Best Valentine ever

Tags in reblog.

[ferrarifinnick]

time zones | charles leclerc 16

charles leclerc x reader

in different cities, plagued by different time zones, charles misses your phone calls once again. suddenly things don't seem so sustainable anymore.

note: hate to do it to you, but here's some angst. get those tissues ready and prepare to clutch those pearls. also, first charles fic! what do we think? love <3

masterlist

warnings: angst, long distance relationship, miscommunication, heartache, sad charles poor charles :(

700 words

7:02am.

Charles stared at the blurry numbers on his phone, squinting at the brightness of the screen and the sunlight pouring into his bedroom. He squeezed his eyes shut when he noticed the notifications from you. Three texts, two calls. All unanswered.

The first text, at 11:58pm.

I just finished work. I'll call you on the way home. Can't wait to hear your voice. I need it.

Charles' chest hurt. 11:58pm, minutes after he must have dozed off. He had tried so hard to keep his eyes open but his day had been so long and sleep was fighting a good battle against him.

At midnight is when the first missed call came through. It would've been 5pm for you. You would be getting out of work and Charles would be about to get into bed. You would've just got to your car, set up Google Maps, and called him. That was the only time you could find to chat to each other lately, and Charles had missed it.

Worse yet, he let you drive home with the disappointment of waiting all day to hear his voice, only to still be alone come night time.

Twenty six minutes later, at your 5:27pm and his 12:27am, the second text came through.

I made it home safe. I saw you got P2, congratulations! Very well deserved my love. Are you still awake?

That's when the next call came through.

Charles knew that you'd have been upset when he didn't answer. He knew you'd be holding back the intrusive thoughts. The what-ifs, the tears, the disappointment. It would have been keeping you up much later when you'd be trying to sleep. But he knew what was really eating at you was the hope that he would wake up and light up your phone with an incoming call.

He knew it was true when he saw the text at your 11:03pm and his 6:03am.

I think we've missed each other tonight. I was looking forward to hearing your voice, but I hope you celebrated that win well. Congratulations on P1 my love, well deserved. Goodnight.

He stared at the time of your last text, your 11:03pm and his 6:03am. One hour ago. You'd barely been asleep for an hour and here he was waking up to start his day. By the time you'd wake up, he'd be in meetings. By the time he'd get out, you'd be in work. By the time you'd finish, he'd be going to sleep.

Charles squeezed his eyes shut. Distance was never easy, but this wasn't the first time you'd missed your small window to talk to each other. It had been happening a lot lately. He knew it was hurting you because it was killing him.

He opened the tab on his phone of flights that neither of you could take. He was stuck where he was, and you were stuck elsewhere. There was never time. Something always changed the circumstances for the worse, and Charles sank his shoulders in defeat.

He deleted the tab on his phone.

Opening your messages, he sent his own reply.

Good morning, mon amour. I'm sorry we missed each other last night. I hope you're sleeping well. I'll call you after you finish work.

He stared at your missed calls again. There was nothing he could do except stare at them and wish they weren't real.

The alarms he forgot to set would have urged him out of bed over half an hour ago, and so he got himself up and dressed for the meeting he was about to be late to, but he couldn't open the door of his lifeless hotel room.

Guilt gnawed at his stomach. It wasn't fair of him to make you live this way for him. You deserved more than a short phone call every couple of days, and he realised that the only way for that to ever change was if you were here with him.

But he knew deep down that following him around the world wasn't what you wanted. While he could give you security, he couldn't give you stability. That's what you wanted more than anything, and that's when he finally realised, after suffering the long distance for so long, that there were two things in life that meant most to him.

The job and the girl.

He wanted both. But as he opened the door of his hotel room, he realised he could only have one. He had to pick. But he knew it wasn't really a choice. There was only one option.

And it wasn't the girl.

[astrasng]

REVEAL || LEE JUYEON

MINORS DNI!

pairing: juyeon x fem!reader

summary: juyeon has a secret which he doesn't want to share with you. nevertheless, you take matters into your own hands to reveal his desires.

wc: 3.6k

warnings: reader is dominant,sub and switch juyeon. handjob, unprotected sex, dirty talk, panty stealing.

author's note: let's not mention how this man is in my head lately and how sad i am that the tbz communitiy is practically dead. sigh.

important!: this is pure fiction, the act in this story is by my imagination and not based off true events. please do not copy the work.

enjoy!♡

    Your skin crawls when you hear Juyeon let out the most beautiful sound you’ve ever heard.

    It stops you in mid-action, your hand stopping in his dark,silky hair,making you look down straight into his eyes as he slowly looks up into yours. His lips were just on you,his plush bottom lip still touching you as he realized what he had just done. 

    He revealed himself. 

    It’s embarrassing for him to look into your eyes after he just moaned out loudly because you accidentally tugged on his hair, something so…dirty or rather kinky not often happened between the two of you. In your relationship with Juyeon, you both preferred being intimate and loving with each other. Of course, you knew about people having secretive desires, or dreams of their partner and what they’d like to do with them. You,yourself can’t even deny that when it comes to your boyfriend. 

    And Juyeon? You always thought it was comfortable for him like this. Between his work and private life to maintain you didn’t want to barge into his bubble which he only kept for himself, not wanting to interrogate him about what are his dark desires. 

    You were dying to know,though. 

    Deep somewhere in Juyeon’s bubble, he’s ashamed. Even if you would ask him about his desires, he’s too shy and ashamed to admit about all the things he fantasizes about you and your body. It takes every energy in him to keep himself disciplined and control his hormones, but whenever he’s left alone for a second he needs to soothe the fire inside him. And every time, he touches himself thinking about the dirty,and arousing dreams he ever had about you. The things he did to you. The things you did to him.

     Juyeon has always been careful. If he wasn’t at work,he did his dirty job whenever you weren’t home, grabbing the perfect opportunity to finally release all the pent up thoughts he had the night before. It was comfortable like this for him, he did his thing, and you did yours. It was unproblematic, the thought that he didn’t need to explain how much of a pervert he is. 

    But of course, you had to catch him once. You went home too early to his liking, catching him manspreading in the center of the bed, his head thrown back against the headboard as your shared bedroom swallows up all the noises he lets out. Your eyes almost popped out of their places when you saw one of your lacy panties wrapped around his already red, wet cock, seeing him teasing himself until he’s on the verge of tears. 

    You didn’t say anything, though. You let him have his time, winning  against your intrusive thoughts that were saying you should go and jump on him right then and there. It was comfortable like this. 

    But both of you were living in a lie.

    So hearing him being affected by a simple and innocent tug, makes you surprised for sure,but that wasn’t the first thought that came into your mind. It was hunger. Hungry for finally being able to hear Juyeon confessing his desires for you.

    Somehow you felt his desire deep in your body too. The way he looked up at you with doe, lust filled eyes suddenly got you mesmerized like it’s contagious. Your whole body started to stiff up at his looks, noticing that his hands slightly twitched against your waist impatiently with thousands of thoughts swimming in his mind.  Even if you wanted to, you couldn’t take your eyes off of him, your fingers still lazily locked around his dark hair. Juyeon feels his brain shut off almost immediately the minute he realizes there’s no way back now,he sees something changing in your eyes, and he feels it in himself too. 

    The way Juyeon is sitting on the edge of the bed makes him almost slip down from it when you don’t pull your hands away, but continue massaging his scalp. The sensation almost makes him moan again, but then he quickly composes himself and pulls further away from your body to look into your eyes again. 

    “Y/N..” He starts with a heaving breathing, his big hands still covering your waist and the majority of your stomach as he tries to go further away from your warm body, but it’s in no vain, you immediately grab one of his hands and keep it on your body. With a small smile, you look down at him, your hand now sliding down to his cheek. 

    “You don’t have to hide away from me, baby. Not anymore.” With a firm headshake you say, your soft voice slowly luring Juyeon into your little game. His breathing is still labored from the sudden sensation, his hands eventually snaking around your waist to pull you against him again between his legs. Juyeon’s lips tremble a little before speaking. “I…I don’t know why I let such vulgar sound out…I’m sorry if it made you uncomfortable.” He confesses, his voice laced with nervousness which makes him even cuter, his eyes still glinting brightly up at you.

    “Do you want me to help you find out?” 

    Juyeon almost chokes on his own spit, his cock stirring awake almost in an instant at your intoxicating words and his pure imagination working inside his head at how you could help him. He imagined it just like this. The only thing he wasn’t sure about, is that he shouldn’t scare you away at any costs. But that doubt quickly goes away when your eyes glint in another color, almost like your natural is laced with a shade of red. Your possessed look makes him look away in embarrassment, his forehead now pressed against your stomach as he groans in response.

    His flushed face makes you chuckle, now sliding your finger under your boyfriend’s chin to make him look into your eyes again. “Honey, I need your words in order to help you. Do you want me to help?” You exhaled with a controlled smile, you tone soft with affection as you caressed his cheek. Juyeon can’t help but bite down onto his bottom lip to prevent it from trembling again, his head slowly nodding as you swipe a few pieces of hair out from his eyes. “Yes, please…” 

    And that was all you needed.

    You smile once again at him, pressing a quick kiss on the tip of his nose before prying his hands off of you to move towards your dresser in your room. “Okay Juyo, then be a good boy and take off your shirt and pants.” You added as you turned your back to him, searching for your robe hung up in your dresser to pull out the silk material that keeps your robe together on your body, a small smile appearing on your face when you hear Juyeon impatiently sitting on the bed. You glance back at him over your shoulder, seeing him shirtless just like you told him to be. He fidgets with his hands as he’s still keeping his eyes locked on your figure, wearing your silk pajama nightgown which perfectly fits your body. His head was filled with you the longer he kept his gaze on your pretty curves, his hands starting to twitch as all he wanted to do was hold you again. 

    With calculated steps, you inch closer to him with the silk material in your hand. Juyeon doesn’t even notice the piece until you swing it infront of his eyes, making him look up at you once again. 

    “Get on your knees on the bed.” 

    Your command sent a shiver down Juyeon’s slim body, not a single doubt rising in his mind, only doing what you ask. He slowly arises from the edge of the bed, now standing in front of your smaller body with a hunched over stance. His height towers over you as he’s looking down at you with narrowed eyes, your head tilted to the side as you question his acts inside your head. 

    “Can I get a kiss before that? Please..” He bites his lips the minute the sentence leaves his mouth, his eyes shut in embarrassment as he can hear how pathetic he is. If he wasn’t the one in this situation, he would laugh at himself at how weird he’s being, but no. His body is on fire, his cock painfully sitting in his boxers and probably already leaking with precum the longer he thinks about how this night might go. He doesn’t care if he has to beg, he just wants to feel you. 

    As you scan his face your own heart squeezes and stomach erupts in butterflies, seeing his eyes almost loopy as he tries to control himself. You send him a small smile and pull him down for a kiss. 

    You have been dating Juyeon for a while now. You knew him from inside-out, there was nothing you didn’t know about him. At least,that’s what you thought. You should’ve known how sly he can be sometimes, because the minute your lips are caught with his, his hands lands on your waist and pulls you closer to him, his hardened member rubbing against your pelvis in desperate circles and you're already caught in his web. He moans into the kiss, his tongue easily sliding over your bottom lip to open you up,making you moan into the kiss too. The lewd noises filling the room alerts you that Juyeon got too ahead, your plan slowly failing. 

    “Juyo…” You whisper between kisses to snap him out, but the nickname hitting his ears makes him kiss you harder, and deeper. One of his hands is now on the back of your neck like he wants to eat you in whole. “Juyeon..” You repeat out of breath, your hands sliding over his defined stomach. Your head is quickly clouded with him and him only, how he pants against your lips and the way he’s holding you in his arms almost makes you throw your plan away in an instant. But something inside you collapses and you pull yourself away from his plush lips with force. 

    When Juyeon notices you stopped, he takes one glance to realize he gets ahead of himself and loses his grip on you. “I’m sorry…I got carried away.” He pants out as he fully lets you go and sits down on the bed again. 

    You take a shaky breath to collect yourself, and squeeze the silk between your hands. “There’s time for everything, Juyo. Now, can you do what I said earlier?” With a soft glance you look into his eyes to earn his trust again, seeing that he practically melts under your gaze at how soft you’re being even though he’s undisciplined. He slowly nods and finally crawls in the center of the bed, only now noticing there’s a mirror sitting across the bed, his own flushed face and body reflecting back. When he turns his head to look at you, you’re already crawling on the bed to kneel behind his frame. He feels his pulse picking up when he can see you looking straight at him through the mirror, his body covering yours. 

    “Can you put your hands behind you? Can you do that for me?” You ask again softly, your own hands caressing his broad shoulders as he nods and puts his hands behind him, now them appearing in front of you. With a sly smile, you take the silk and tie his hands together behind him, feeling him tense up when he realizes your motives. His eyes are foggy when he turns his head to the side to look at you, his lips already opening to speak up. “It’s okay, just trust me,baby.” You say before he could, pressing a quick kiss on his lips and softly, you turn his head back to the mirror. 

    “Now…I want you to do something else for me, Juyo.” You whisper into his ear, feeling his back muscles tense up against your body at your voice. 

    “W..what is it?” He asks breathlessly, his eyes locked on you. 

    “I want you to close your eyes and focus on my voice.” 

    Thousands of thoughts are swimming inside Juyeon’s head at your request, but nevertheless, he closes his cat-like eyes and exhales. He feels his whole body trembling in excitement as he feels one of your hands sliding down from his neck down towards his abdomen, your lips now pressing wet kisses on the side of his neck. When you take a look down over his shoulder, you see his very visible bulge wanting to break free, and in normal situations you would do that. But when your eyes scan him furtherly, you see his pink tip peeking out from under the boxer, coated with precum shamelessly. All the saliva runs together in your mouth at the sight, your thighs squeezing together immediately as you practically see it throbbing with need. “Baby…I didn’t know you needed me that much.”  You can’t help but run one of your fingers over his slit, making him jump slightly at your touch and whimper.

    “When did this happen? Just because I tugged on your hair?” You added to your question, seeing that his eyes are still closed just like you told him to. His adam’s apple bobs as he swallows, his breathing heaving. “No…” He stutters, feeling his cock jumping again when you pull his boxer further up against his tip. 

    At his voice you smirk and whisper into his ear. “Then? Tell me, baby” 

    “I have been thinking about you all day.” He blurts out in one exhale.

    Oh. 

    Oh. 

    You wish you could say this doesn’t affect you. But his voice and the way he says it makes you bite down on your bottom lip. 

    Slowly, you follow the outline of his bulge through his boxer, hearing his breath hitching at your touch. “And what were you thinking about?” 

    Juyeon groans as he feels your other hand slide down over his chest, your finger brushing past his nipple just enough to make him want more. “I was...t..thinking about you and your…scent.” He mumbles quietly, his head hung low in shame. 

    You smile. This is exactly what you were expecting to hear. 

    Slowly, you tease the edge of the boxer with your nails and press a wet, loud kiss on his neck once again. “Yeah?” 

    Juyeon nods, his mouth agape as he tries to get air into his airway. “I was thinking about you and your perfect, perfect pussy.” 

    He confesses as you finally pull his boxers down, his hardness springing up against his stomach. For a second Juyen wants to open his eyes, but then he rather squeezes them together when he feels your hand finally touching him where he needs it the most. “Tell me more, Juyo.” 

    Juyeon groans, his breathing picking up. “I was thinking about how you always take me so well. How your pussy is made for me.” He mumbles. 

    You squeeze his cock at his base slightly, feeling him throbbing against your hand. You continue your work on his cock while with your other hand, you circle around his nipple, already red from the irritation. Juyeon can’t help but moan into the thick air as the sensations collab, his climax slowly building in the pit of his stomach. 

    “Continue.” 

    With a small whimper he swallows and he feels his hands closing in a fist. “I’m always thinking about your warm walls whenever you're not home,sometimes I even..” 

    As you jerk him off seductively, he feels his head slowly melting into a puddle, cutting himself off before he says something he doesn’t want to. But it doesn’t go unnoticed by you. 

    “What are you doing when I’m not home, hmm?” You ask, your warm breath hitting his ears sends a shiver down his spine, his cock jumping in your hands. 

    “I steal your panties.” 

    At his confession, you squeeze your thighs together once again, thinking back to that one time when you catched him jerking off with your favorite panties. Your own heart picks up when you speed up your hand on his cock, other hand still teasing his sensitive nipples when you whisper into his ear, “Open your eyes, Juyo.” 

    And he does. He slowly opens them as he pants, his eyes immediately landing on that lacy panty layed out in front of his knees. 

    “You mean this?”

     His eyes bulge out from their places, his figure hunched forward as he feels his climax reaching him. “Baby...” He moans, the end of the nickname dragged out with a whimper. 

    “Look at me, Juyo.” 

    At your voice he picks his head up to look at your through the mirror, his eyes filled with tears, stomach tensed up as he fucks into your hand desperately. 

    “Please, baby, let me cum, I really need to!” 

    His voice breaking makes you chuckle lowly as your hand speeds up again, his arousal helping you out as your fingers swipe over his slit, his body spasming in your arms as he reaches his climax. Without another word, white, thick spurts of cum shoot onto your panties, so much that you could scoop it up in your hands. 

    Juyeon pants and moans loudly into the chilly air of your room, his hands curled into a fist behind his back as he tries to move away from your hand. But it's vain, because you keep jerking him even after he empties himself on your panties he stole all those weeks ago. In agony, he whimpers again, his voice deep when he speaks up. “Stop, please, ‘s too sensitive, baby...” 

    “Oh? So I assume you don’t want to feel my perfect pussy either, right?” You graze your teeth on his neck, your eyes narrowingly looking at him through the mirror. At your remark, Juyeon picks his head up again and starts shaking it side to side. “N..no I want to-” 

    “Then get over here already.” You breathe out, your hands already pulling the silk material off of his wrists. Like clockwork, the minute he feels his hands free again, he turns around and cages you in between his arms. The pathetic, whimpering Juyeon you saw a minute ago is nowhere to be seen as he presses kisses on your stomach when he scrunches your nightgown further up. As he towers over your small body once again, he groans when he sees that you’re not wearing any underwear, your pussy coated with your arousal, so wet he could slide in perfectly. And that’s what he wants, but before he could, you stop him and pull him down for a kiss. Your teeths collide in a hurried, messy kiss, your saliva spilling in smaller portions whenever Juyeon pulls back to bite down your bottom lip. 

    “Can I put it in? Please?” He breathes against your lips, his cock already swiping between your lips making the both of you moan out in the air. Your own skin rises when you feel him sucking and biting down on the side of your neck, one of his hands caressing the skin on your stomach. His moves make you dizzy all over again, and all it takes for you to nod and feel him already pressing his tip into your gushing hole. 

    “Fuck, ‘s so tigh…mnghm…” Juyeon breathes out against the swell of your breasts, pushing himself deeper and deeper between your slick and warm walls. You squeeze your eyes together as you feel him hitting the perfect spots in just one go, his tip brushing against your cervix which makes your legs shake around his hips. You moan when you feel him filling you up perfectly, Juyeon intervening one of your hands together with his. “I have been waiting for this all day, baby. Thank you.” 

    Juyeon mumbles against you again as he’s hunched over you, his hips buckling into you in desperate, quick moves. When you feel his cock brushing against that spot again, you can’t help but cry out in desire, throwing your head back onto the pillow. Juyeon’s hips slam against you uncontrollably as he’s been waiting for this, his climax building up already. “Baby I’m so close…tell me you are too.” 

    “Shit, Juyo. Make me cum please.” 

    At your desperate voice Juyeon groans, his hand squeezing around yours as he picks his speed up, his other hand sneaking down to your puffy clit which makes you squirm between his arms. “Juyoo..” 

    You can’t help but cry out once again as you feel your climax reaching you, tipping your balance over like a wave as you come around Juyeon’s cock. The minute he feels you come around him, he bucks his hip one more time before spilling his cum inside you this time, groaning into your neck as he nuzzles himself closer to you. He slows down as he feels your arousal mixing with his, when glancing down seeing that it’s already oozing out around his cock, spilling on your sheets in thick drops. 

    As both of you are trying to come off from your high, Juyeon looks up at you with hazy eyes, pressing a kiss on your forehead as he pulls out while wincing. 

    “When did you see me?” It’s all he asks. You smile to yourself, your hands caressing his sides as he still keeps himself up with his hands. 

    “When your practice was called off, and I wanted to make you dinner to celebrate for an extra free day. But I guess you got ahead of me with the celebration.” You chuckle as you see Juyeon’s face scrunch up, his forehead dropped between your breasts in a groan. 

[gisele0127]

Could you do something where you ask Michael Kaiser, Rin + Sae Itoshi, and Reo Mikage if they only love you for your body? Thanks :)

notes: thank you for the request i love it :) not proofread though :(

Michael Kaiser

╰┈➤ “if anything you love me for my body”

you lay on his bed looking up at the ceiling after being intimate with michael. he comes back in the room holding two glasses of water humming to himself.

“here you go my lovely lady”

you pick up the glass of water, thankful for his kind actions. michael is a very loving partner, he always makes sure you feel loved and appreciated. even with all the assurance you can’t help but feel that maybe he’s just using you for your body. he’s always praising it, but maybe it was just something you weren’t used to.

“what you thinking about love?” he looks down at you lightly smiling. letting the intrusive thoughts win, “do you only love me because of my body?”. he chokes on his water and looks at you offended.

“excuse me? if anything i should be the one saying that. i mean look at me” you turn to face him, kind of annoyed he once again made this about himself. wrapping his arms around you and softly kissing your temple he says, “i’m just joking love. what would make you think that anyways?”

“i don’t know, you just always compliment my body so i just can’t help it” he smiles smugly, “oh i see what this is about. for the record i love everything about you, especially your caring nature. i guess my way of showing you love is complimenting you. and who do you think i am?! talking about im only using you for your body! i’m not a douche”

you see him pouting, he’s so dramatic. but in all honesty his words make you feel better, and you feel stupid for ever thinking that. of course he loves you for you. you’re the only person who could ever put up with him.

Rin itoshi

╰┈➤ “babe it’s 3 in the morning”

it’s currently 3:08 in the morning and you’re laying awake in bed next to your boyfriend. he’s sound asleep facing the other way, but you? you’ve just woken up from a nightmare where in which while you and rin were in a long distance relationship and he happened to have cheated on you, because “texting you was not enough”.

you stir him awake feeling a bit insecure. “rin, wake up” groaning he tiredly says, “babe it’s 3 in the morning what do you want?”

“do you only love me for my body?” “no” and he goes back to sleep a little annoyed that you woke him up for one of you silly questions.

“i can feel you staring at me y/n. what’s wrong?” “i don’t know” he groans annoyed, and drapes his arms around your torso.

“that’s such a stupid question. i don’t even care about what you look like. you could be as ugly as a troll and id still love you. now go to sleep i have to wake up early”

you softly smile at rin, sometimes he could be a little weird but you know what he means. but one things for sure, you feel better knowing that you boyfriend would still in fact love you if you were a troll.

Sae Itoshi

╰┈➤ “i cant name someone else with a better ass”

“do you only love me for my body?”

sae’s taken aback by such a random question while he’s sitting down watching replays of games.

“excuse me?” he looks at you with confusion.

“do. you. only. love. me. for. my. body?”

“well i can’t name someone else with a better ass” he says bluntly. sae has no filter and he says things as he sees. the man has a butt fetish after all. you look at him surprised that your boyfriend actually said that.

“what? i’m just being honest stop looking at me like that.” he says bluntly. you’re now laughing because you can in fact name other people with a better butt, but you quickly turn the conversation back to what you were saying before.

“i’m being serious sae”

“so am i”

“you only love me because of my ass?”

“yep”

“you’re an asshole you know that?”

he pulls you into a hug, something he rarely does and says, “i’m your asshole. and no that’s not the only thing i love about you” he flicks your forehead and gently kisses it. “it’s just a bonus”.

Mikage Reo

╰┈➤ “i have standards you know.”

“you really think that?!” he sounds surprised that you would even ask that question. “we’re literally doing face masks and watching keeping up with the kardashians and you’re asking me if i love you only because of your body?”

he’s so dramatic. “i have standards you know. i’m not some low life.” you look at him seriously, a little hurt to be quite honest. he notices the glossyness in your eyes and is quick to give you a soft look.

“i don’t just fall for anyone you know. you’re special, and you know that. so don’t come asking me silly questions” he ruffles your hair.

you feel better at his reassurance, and when you think deeper in thought you scold yourself. reo could’ve chosen anyone in the world and he chose you. he’s lucky to have you.

in the morning you wake up to an extravagant breakfast made by yours truly (surprisingly), and now you’re thinking about how lucky you got.

[theambitiouswoman]

Moving against the current is always going to feel tricky. It’s normal for someone who’s doing something different than everyone else to question themselves. To have doubts. Especially because they do not have anyone they can go to for advice, or for the reassurance that they’re doing the right thing.

Here’s the thing you need to remember, the people who succeed in life do so because they stand out. Because they were different. Because they brought something new to fruition. They found a new angle or strategy that they didn’t see anyone else doing and they ran with it. Making them the first of their kind. That’s why they stood out.

Stop looking for reassurance. That’s what your gut and instinct is for. You believing in what you are doing is all of the reassurance you need. Take the risk. Decide that people “not understanding you” means that you are actually on the right path.

Stop looking for peoples approval because we are not looking for their approval. We are looking to succeed. We are looking to grow. We are looking to be different. We are looking to win. They may not get it now, but they will surely believe in you once you create it. “Approval” just means fitting into preexisting boxes and watering yourself down.

You wouldn’t have had the idea planted in your mind if you weren’t ready. If you were not capable of making it happen. Do not let your intrusive thoughts or limiting beliefs take over. Approve of yourself. Believe in yourself. Thats where the magic in you comes to life✨

[authorhjk1]

Reply not needed

"Is 'No Nut November' actually a thing? Or is it just an ancient internet meme that got way out of hand?"

" I don't know... Maybe? Look, I'm not an internet historian. I know some guys do it just for the sake of doing a challenge. Helps them focus or something."

"Have you considered doing it?"

"No, never-"

" You should do it!"

That's the conversation playing in your head when Karina revealed this:

Chaewon, Minju and Yena are going to be at your place when Karina is away gearing up for Aespa's comeback. (Ok technically it's Karina's place when she bought it with her sweet Kwangya money). You're no stranger to them, you've always enjoyed their company when you're somehow included in their "girls' night".

The only difference this time: They are essentially living with you for the whole of November.

You would've offered to go back to your old place or stay with a friend in the meantime. Karina's cuteness begging you to stay with them quickly dispelled that idea.

You're still really unsure this is a good idea and the stress is getting to you. That's when you're intrusive thoughts gets louder.

What if they are wearing those hot dolphin shorts with their cute little ass cheeks hanging out? The wet hair looks with a hint of shampoo smell when they just got out of the shower... Maybe even just wrapped in a towel with a hint of cleavage... Would they invite you to join them in the shower? Hmm, how good is it to have Yena's dick-sucking lips wrapped around you? A sex marathon with Chaewon pushing her to the limit? Minju just fully wrapped around you as you bottom her out, your abs hurting as you squeeze every ounce of cum inside her.

Damn it. Think normally. YOU ARE NOT CHEATING ON KARINA.

Is this some cruel test that Karina tailor-made for you? Or does she secretly gets wet when her hot idol friends make you desperately want to cum but you can't because it's inappropriate?

Is this just Karina's secret plan, using her friends to edge you, weaponize the concept of No Nut November just so she gets to have you in a sex-depraved state all for herself.

Or maybe you'll get rewarded and end up fucking all of them side by side, breeding all of them until their pussies overflow.

What happens if you can't jerk off since they would be constantly around? You have a bad feeling that No Nut November has just started for you whether you like it or not 🙈

===

Being constantly in a confined space in close proximity with hot idols especially when everyone is sexually charged 😳 The idols intentionally and unintentionally tease you😏

Would this be the case of OC cheating on Karina? Would OC secretly have sex with Yena, Minju and Chaewon individually without letting the others know?

Just a rough idea so you don't have to take any of the above seriously. I hope the setting/scenario would help inspire some fun and kinky scenes of smut.

Feel free to change up the idols any one of them is hard to write for you. Just throwing these idols out here because of the GIFs 😊

Surviving NNN

Part One : Temptations

You look at the four women in front of you, unable to form a word. Your girlfriend smiles at you.

"Hello, oppa!"

Karina steps forward to kiss your lips. You lean down a little, but she still has to get on her tiptoes. Holding the back of her head, you feel her silky hair as you smell her shampoo. Vanilla.

You have to think of something else. You have to win this bet. The price is worth it.

"You know the girls, right?"

You nod your head. Of course you do.

Choi Yena. She has the nickname "duck" for a reason. She looks cute whatever she does. Even when she fights with Chaewon. Her voice changes somewhat, which makes her into an angry duckling. Her new pink hair makes her look more like a celebrity in your eyes.

Kim Chaewon. She can be just as cute as Yena. Although that can change quickly. You have seen it first hand. She becomes quite flirty when she drinks a little. You hope she doesn't do it any time soon.

Kim Minju. The youngest of the four. You haven't seen much of her so far, but you do follow her on Instagram. Her wide hips....

You mentally stop yourself to continue this thought. Without the bet you made with Karina, it would've been fine thinking about her. But not right now.

Since the four of them hang out quite often, you occasionally do have lewd thoughts. You can't help it. Yes, you do have Karina and one might argue she is more than enough for your brain to comprehend. And yet there is something different about the other three. They all have their own charms. You would never cheat on Karina, but sometimes it does look tempting.

"What do you mean?"

You furrow your eyebrows after Karina explained the situation.

"Why would they all stay here?"

"You don't like us?"

Chaewon's question makes you shake your head.

"It's not that. But we have to be careful."

This might be the proper moment to mention that you are an idol as well. A soloist. A lot of eyes are on Karina for obvious reasons. But you could say you are her male equivalent. Your last MV just broke the 100M views mark a couple of day ago. For groups like Twice or Blackpink, that's standard. But to do that within a week? You find it not so bad.

Of course you can imagine what happened, when the media caught you and Karina on a date. You did try to hide to the best of your capabilities, but it wasn't enough. Picture of you walking alongside each other, holding hands, can't be interpreted any other way. A lot of MY's did send you rather odd messages, but you try to ignore them. Your relationship with Karina is now public for around six month.

That's why it's a bad idea to let her friends sleep over for a whole month. Especcially since Karina is going overseas for her comeback preperations. And also because of the bet you made. If you succeed No-Nut-November, Karina has promised you a special gift on December 1st. You keep wondering what it is. But the problem is the punishment. You will have to do everything that Karina wants for the end of the year. Which doesn't just include sex. But cleaning, taking out the trash and so on. You two live together in one apartment after all. You just hope the gift is worth all the risks and trouble.

In the end, as always, Karina did convince you to let Yena, Chaewon and Minju stay here. You wonder if that's her way of trying to sabotage your success. She did have to promise to not seduce you during this month.

And there you are now. Sitting on the expensive black leather couch, watching TV, while you hear your knew roommates around the apartment. It has two bedrooms, but because you and Karina sleep in one bed, one is always empty. That room is now occupied by Yena and Chaewon. You tried to convince Minju that you have no problem with sleeping on the mattress in the living room, but she refused to take your bed.

You hear the shower stop as you watch the kdrama "Bloodhounds" on the big screen. Since your overall concept is kinda bad boyish, you always try to watch stuff like this. The melody for your new song is already finished, only the lyrics are missing . You even have a title by now: "Dangerous game"

When the door to the bathroom opens, you instinctively turn your head. It turns out to be a grave mistake.

Kim Minju is standing in the doorframe. You might have been incredibly glad the she isn't just wearing a towel, but what she is actually wearing makes your head spin.

Her dark hair is still wet from the shower, the warm air slowly crawling out of the bathroom. It partially hides her face and you can even smell her shampoo from where you sit. A fruity scent. Similiar to strawberries. Her black top stretches a little over her chest, which you woudn't really have noticed if it weren't for the 13 day without cuming already.

But your main focus definitely lies on her lower body. She is wearing black denim high waist hotpants, which show off her small waist and wide hips. Especially her thighs. Oh my god, her thighs. They look nice and full as always. They jiggle slightly as she walks out of the door.

______

Hi erveryone, I hope you like the first chapter of this mini series. The theme is fitting for this month, so I thought "Wy not?" This chapter doesn't really have any action in it, since it's mostly the introduction. I hope you enjoy it nonetheless.

[postersofleon]

religious trauma with leon kennedy, dash of smut; no minors, afab.

- leon and you basically grew up together in the catholic church. unfortunately for the two of you, you grew up in a very obsessive and scary way of religion. basically it's religious ocd and intrusive thoughts.

- leon became a cop wanting to help people while you became a something equal to him. leon and you have a constant fear of god. you two are useless virgins who just want to please god.

- when the events of raccoon city happened, leon thought he betrayed god for not helping people, and he was having to suffer the nightmares for his sins. he was having night terrors of the devil. he was weeping and he had to call you.

- two traumatized religious people are praying for leon, for the arcangel michael to protect leon from the devil and the arcangel gabriel to heal his mind. oh, they are horrible in the sense of way.

- leon and you cuddle and leon feels safe.

- you temporarily live with him and go to church. something is happening between you two, it was pure angst of leon crying and you consoling him. he sees you as his angel and he hates himself.

- but you notice something different. it took time and you ask him, "during the... raccoon city tragedy, a woman kissed me." leon looked nervous to mention it. "i temporarily let my lust win." you looked shocked. "the mercenary?" leon...

- you press the cross on his forehead as you sat on his lap, "leon..." leon accept his scolding, his eyes closed and felt good. "Hail Mary, Full of Grace, The Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among..."

- something snapped in leon, he adored this scolding, but he hated how he felt cock twitch. you pressed the cross closer to him. "you were in hell." you whispered softly. leon nodded his head, he couldn't agree more. tears poured in his eyes, he couldn't control himself. "help me."

- you pushed him to the couch, leon was panicking as tears appeared more and more. his mind was being desired by the devil laughing. "please, please," leon sobbed softly, "god help me."

- you muttered softly a prayer as you prayed over and over. leon wasn't even thinking about anything, his hand twitched. did god hate him? why did his cock ache? you tie his hands with his rosary, leon groaned weakly.

- you began to panic. his noises, his cries- they made your heart flutter.

- adam and eve. leon was eve and you were adam. leon had tasted the sin and now you were crawling. this was a new feeling. tears formed in your eyes.

leon's cock was the prettiest shade of pink you have ever seen. leon and you didn't know what to do, his arms were tied with the your rosary. his arms twitched, his biceps tensed up and so did his pecs. holy god, he looked beautiful as weeped. his cock was leaking his cum, tears over and over of his seed. sex isn't for pleasure, it's only for procreation yet why did you and him need it.

your cunt felt that unfamiliar feeling. god! oh, heavenly father you needed to feel it. your hand gently touched his tip and leon whined weakly. his cheeks were red, his eyes were closed. they were going to hell. you closed your own eyes as you took off your lower clothes.

your cunt was wet and needy. "leon..." your eyes opened, "i don't know..." leon's hips buckled a bit, you noticed how pretty his body was. his black shirt was up to his tummy, his well defined body made you so stupidly weak. his happy trail... his cum.

you gently grabbed his cock and pressed his tip around your folds. leon whined louder. his tip was collecting all of your wetness, but when it touched your clit it was your turn to groan. neither you or leon had ever even masturbated. it was sin yet why? why? "leon..." your mind was thinking of hell as his tip found your hole. your cunt clenched pathetically.

leon couldn't even control his hands, his dumb sinful hands were wrapped around your rosary so it was just you slowly going down. it burns! the details of his cock were slowly forming a spot inside of you. your whines became louder. slowly and painfully, you sat on his cock. your mind was rotted, leon had never imagined your cunt to feel so good. tears poors from your eyes. you two were scared of god, every detail of god watching you two, but you couldn't stop.

you carefully took off the rosary from his arms, "i'm-" you were stumbling with your words, "i'm sorry." leon understood. this was new. his hand was on your hip, he was scared ro touch you more despite his needy cock deep in you.

now what?

leon's hand gently moved your hip closer. leon was gasping weakly, he found the code to make this work even more. he felt his heart beating fast as his hips moved up and down. your soft walls of your cunt clenched pathetic. leon won't last long. his other hand grabbed the back of your neck as he gasped weakly. your tears poured from your eyes, you were scared of hell. there was a reason why god made sex feel so good.

your eyes closed, you were trying to connect with god. you needed to apologize to god for having sex with your best friend. leon planted kisses on your jaw and neck and you pressed closer to him to him and leon cummed. you groan weakly, feeling his seed deep in you, but something was bothering you. you were still needy. you didn't cum.