#this is what Murat does to me

[ic-napology]

Here you go:

napoleon buttocks

murat has COMPETITION

[many-gay-magpies]

okay so since the dbda soundtrack is out now, i can finally be insufferable about the things i've noticed by putting names and timestamps to them rather than just shouting nonsensically about them. this is excellent :D

as i already saw someone else point out, there is a section of running from hell / i'm in love with you beginning at roughly the 3:40 mark that has also played two other times in the show...

first, very quietly, at the end of episode 6 when edwin tried to confess the first time, and...

again in episode 8, when charles and edwin hugged (it's included in esther's origin / a new deal on the soundtrack)

i am Looking At This with very big eyes rn. blake neely and murat selçuk i am in your walls what does this mean

BUT ALSO. there is another section. that drives me just about insane. the only place i can find it in the SOUNDTRACK is in accepting being dead at the 3:10 mark... and it plays over the scene of charles dying/becoming a ghost in charles' flashback to edwin saving him at the start of episode 7. but it actually plays one other time in the show...

over edwin comforting charles and them hugging for the first time at the end of episode 5.

what does it MEANNNNNNNNN

[joachimnapoleon]

A look at three Fouché biographies

Over the past few months I've read three English-language biographies on Fouché: Joseph Fouché: Portrait of a Politician, by Stefan Zweig; Fouché: Unprincipled Patriot, by Hubert Cole; and Medusa's Head: The Rise and Survival of Joseph Fouché, Inventor of the Modern Police State, by Rand Mirante. These are a great example of how dramatically interpretations of a historical figure can vary from one historian to another (see also the difference between Alan Schom's interpretation of Napoleon vs. that of Andrew Roberts). And also a great example of why it’s a good idea to read multiple biographies on the same figure, to gain a more well-rounded perspective, instead of simply accepting/adopting that of the first biographer you read.

Zweig is a colorful writer and his biography is highly entertaining—he actually had me laughing out loud a few times—but his depictions of Fouché are so hilariously sinister and malignant throughout that at times it almost feels like a caricature. Zweig also utilizes the least amount of primary source material out of the three biographers--hardly any, actually--and so much of what he writes in regard to Fouché's motivations and thoughts come across as pure speculation or projection, but are always stated very matter-of-factly. Zweig presents a Fouché who chafes at the smallness of the roles he is given, driven by "unflinching selfishness." "When in power," Zweig writes, "he does not work for the State, does not work for the Directory or for Napoleon, but for himself." Aside from raw ambition, Zweig attributes most of Fouché’s actions to his sheer delight in engaging in intrigue for the sake of intrigue, an interpretation that seems to come straight out of Napoleon’s venting on St. Helena: “Intrigue was to Fouché a necessary of life. He intrigued at all times, in all places, in all ways, and with all persons. Nothing ever came to light, but he was found to have had a hand in it. He made it his sole business to look out for something that he might be meddling with. His mania was to wish to be concerned with everything.” Overall, Zweig’s book is worth reading, but out of the three English-language Fouché biographies, it’d be ranked third on my list.

Hubert Cole’s interpretation of Fouché is as different from Zweig’s as night is from day. The key word in Cole’s title is “Patriot,” and Cole’s central point is that Fouché, at each point in his career, was doing what he believed was in the best interests of France, even if that meant negotiating for peace with Britain behind Napoleon’s back, or pushing Napoleon towards a divorce and remarriage for the sake of shoring up the Bonaparte dynasty, or even (repeatedly) abandoning one master to serve another. This is the second one of Cole’s biographies I’ve read, and as most of you following me already know, I loved his dual biography on Joachim and Caroline Murat, the deceptively named The Betrayers, which is actually a very sympathetic look at the Murat couple. Cole is no fan of Napoleon and doesn’t really attempt to hide it, and maybe it’s because of this that he feels inclined to look deeper at the motivations and actions of those who ended up in opposition to Napoleon at various points (and who have therefore been demonized in history books accordingly). Cole draws heavily on primary sources, from letters and memoirs of Fouché’s contemporaries, to Fouché’s police bulletins (quoted at length throughout) to argue that “It is possible… that he was a sincere and moderately successful patriot. It is not uncommon in France for egoists to be hailed as patriots, and patriots condemned as traitors.” Far from the sinister, cold-blooded figure that haunts Zweig’s biography, or the “universally distrusted, feared, and hated” social pariah of Mirante’s, Cole's Fouché is charming, a welcome figure in the drawing rooms of Paris society, with a preference for making friends rather than enemies; nevertheless Cole does not deny that Fouché could also be ruthless, ambitious, and cunning. Cole also uses numerous accounts regarding Fouché by British, German, and Russian contemporaries, “in the belief that their prejudices, if national, are less personal.” Out of these three biographies, this one was my personal favorite, as I think it provides a more well-rounded picture of Fouché as a human being.

The primary focus of Mirante’s book is Fouché’s administration of the Ministry of Police, and the biography goes into great detail about the operations of the police in Napoleonic France, its vast network of informants, subversion of the press, surveillance of emigrés, and steady stream of information flowing in from all quarters. Fouché emphasized to his subordinates how one small detail or event could be “of great interest in the general order of things by its connections with related matters of which you are scarcely aware.” Like Cole, Mirante quotes frequently from Fouché’s police bulletins, as well as from memoirs of the era (though most of the excerpts are those hostile to Fouché). Unlike Cole, Mirante’s Fouché is driven not by any higher patriotism, but—especially after his humiliating flight from France in 1810—by a deep and abiding hatred of Napoleon, towards whose final destruction Fouché is willing to go to any length. Mirante provides more detail on Fouché’s exile and final years than either Zweig or Cole, one interesting aspect of which is the warm welcome Fouché received in Trieste from Elisa Bonaparte, who had been driven from power in Tuscany largely through Fouché’s machinations with Murat in 1814. Mirante ends the book with a critical look at Fouché’s dubious, ghostwritten “memoirs,” the credibility of which he is far more suspicious than Cole, who accepts the argument of French historian Louis Madelin that they are “largely authentic and accurate.” Mirante, on the other hand, is not convinced, and concludes that the memoirs are “highly assailable, at least quasi-spurious, and shrouded in controversy and deceit.” Mirante ends by drawing parallels between Fouché’s policing methods and those of the Gestapo and NKVD in the 20th century.

Overall I enjoyed all three of these for different reasons, and taken together they offer a more complete picture of Fouché. I haven’t gotten around to reading any French-language biographies on Fouché yet, but I do have a couple works on him by Emmanuel de Waresquiel that are definitely on my to-read list.

[josefavomjaaga]

What is the Napoleonic character you hate?

In particular, I hate Murat and Ney. They have a lot of publicity but in reality they were mediocre soldiers. They are only famous for their beautiful portraits.

If Davout had been handsome, he would have been the most famous marshal.

(I really wonder: is there even a way to answer this without getting myself into trouble again?)

I try not to hate. Really. I also try not to love. I.e., I don't want to let the fact that I'm fond of one historical character more than of others get in the way of treating them fairly. But I'm only human, of course I have preferences, and I'm sure they influence me without me even realizing.

At the very least, I try to not hate the person but rather specific actions or character traits that do not quite agree with me.

So, why do I like Eugène? Mostly because, according to a vast majority of sources, he was

kind, friendly, sociable and good-natured to such a high degree that it set him apart from others

modest and unambitious (i.e., not a braggart or dazzler promising more than he can deliver, nobody to claim other people's laurels for himself)

reliable and much tougher than he looked, able to withstand a lot and to pull through, somehow managing even truly hard tasks (Pierre Branda, who does not like him, at one point calling him "unmoved like marble")

Obviously, I tend to dislike the opposites of these features then. Also obviously, military talent or lack thereof does not play the slightest role in my evaluation system 😊. If so, Eugène surely could not rank very high.

But I do dislike Hortense for her ambitions (which she, to be fair, in her memoirs denies she had), and for emphasising her role at the expense of others, for badmouthing them while lying about herself to make herself look better.

I've also come to dislike Junot recently, though this is mostly based on me discovering Laure's "journal intime". And I think what I truly hate regarding this is the fact that this testimony - by a woman who claims to have been assaulted by her husband and put through a several-hours-long nightmare - has been disregarded, ridiculed and scoffed at by several generations of (male) historians now. I mean, if it's possible to prove that Laure is lying in it, please go ahead and do it, I'll be happy to change my opinion. But instead, this source is just not taken serious, hidden within an opus called "The unknown novel of the Duchess d'Abrantès", already implying it may be fictional, with both Chantemesse and especially Joseph Turquan being only interested in belittling the woman and in talking about her affair with Balincourt. Obviously, her sleeping with that guy in 1813 is much more scandalous than her husband stabbing and strangling her in 1810...

Overall I tend to think that in most cases, when I dislike somebody, this tends to change a bit as soon as I learn more about them. It was true for both Ney and Murat, though much more for the latter.

Thanks for the Ask! (and I really hope I did not offend anybody).

[your-dandy-king]

Hey sweet Helene would you like to do a little challenge with me ?

Tell your uncle Murat that his hair doesn’t match his outfit, proceed to comment that he looks kinda “halloweeny” , then end it by saying you ate a worm to loose weight

Helene ate a worm once, because she saw the birds eating worms and thought if they could eat it, it must be tasty. She quickly learned that bird food wasn’t the same as people food.

“Yucky!” she says, screwing her face up at the memory. Why does this person want her to say she ate a worm? She’ll never do that again!

She’s not sure what “halloweeny” means either. “Weeny” like “weiner”? Uncle Joachim doesn’t look like a sausage.

( @murillo-enthusiast)

[a-mysterious-wisp-of-mist]

Interlude: A prince on the march

One good thing about being dead is the fact that, under normal circumstances, you do not really get tired or hungry anymore, meaning that you need little rest and can cover a lot of ground in quite a short time.

That’s what Eugène realizes once he has crossed the river Lot. He notices that he gets closer to the limits of Murat’s domain as he sees dawn breaking. By the time the sun has fully risen over the horizon, afterlife Cahors has disappeared behind him, and he finds himself on a small footpath leading into some unknown forrest. The mountainous region seems friendly enough. Smell of resin fills the air, with the sun glistening on tiny creeks and wagtails wading through the shallows.

Monsieur Goya has not left him any directions on where to find him but Eugène has already understood that those might not do him much good anyway. Travelling through these parts seems quite unrelated to compasses, maps and milestones. Eugène assumes – and he may be right or wrong about this – that reaching a certain point here has a lot to do with imagination and intention, probably willpower as well.

Eugène does have the intention to seek out Monsieur Goya, make no mistake. He has not yet given up on the idea of his portrait. But now – especially now that the alluring paints donated by Marshal Soult are not under his nose anymore – he also feels tempted to just go explore a little. To see the unknown, discover new places, meet new people, make new friends.

I should have loved to be a sailor, he thinks, not for the first time.

Maybe it’s this rather vague intention of his why his road does not lead him to Monsieur Goya’s house right away. Instead, he follows the path into the forrest and onto a rather large clearing. A small circus seems to be resting there, only three or four waggons, the horses grazing nearby.

There’s a juggler on the rooftop of one of the waggons, practicing his art. He’s incredibly good, the balls circling over his head so quickly Eugène finds it impossible to even only count them. The man seems to carry a mask, the mask of a fox, and, somehow, he also seems eerily familiar.

It’s only when the juggler jumps off the roof onto the ground, doing a somersault in the process, and somehow still juggling the balls, that Eugène realizes that the man’s mask seems to have melted onto his face. And it’s only when the juggler adresses him in a familiar voice that Eugène recognizes him.

Why, if this isn’t our beloved prince, our dear Viceroy of Italy, the charming Son forever in search of a Father. He whom everybody loves and nobody respects.

Fouché!

Indeed. Though, from somebody renowned for his politeness, I should have expected a different form of salutation.

I beg your pardon, Your Excellency. I have been rather surprised by your appearance. You have taken up a new profession in this afterlife?

The man in the fox mask pretends to drop one ball, only to catch it at the very last moment, and shrugs.

A man has to make a living somehow. Even if he’s dead. It’s not like I have a mother married to an emperor. Or other friends in high places making sure I will survive no matter what happens. It’s also not as if you have gone out of your way to help me, when I had to leave France and asked for your support, back in the days, is it?

Eugène remembers. Clearly. And as Fouché treats him in such a hostile way, he sees no reason to be less confrontational.

There was no way I could in good conscience suggest to my father-in-law to allow you into his country, Monsieur le Duc d’Otrante. Not after all the scheming, double-dealing and betrayal you had committed. If you allow me to be frank, I even find it hard to believe to see you in freedom like this. There must have been thousands of people in France praying for you to go to hell.

The juggler laughs.

Adorable! The puppy is baring his milk teeth. Well, my prince, it may not have occurred to you yet but heaven and hell are fleeting concepts, depending a lot on personal preferences. Maybe I am in hell, who knows? Or maybe I have been to hell and have run from it? I could tell you, of course, but if I did, would you believe me?

He stretches out one open hand, and all the juggling balls drop into its palm, melting into a single one that he casually puts in his pocket.

But I am in fact delighted at this meeting. It’s rare for us to come across our old acquaintances from our living days, almost as if those do not want to have anything to do with us. And I say ‚us’ because I am not alone. Come, let me take you to our impresario. You may find another familiar face in him.

He is right. This time Eugène has no problems recognizing Monsieur Charles-Maurice de Talleyrand-Périgord, despite the man’s rather shabby, worn-out habit of colourful fake silk, and a horrible wig of shrill pink colour. Talleyrand even wears thick layers of make-up and powder. He looks like a mixture of a Pierrot and a cheap whore, sweetish perfumes included. Eugène bows, somewhat baffled.

Monsieur de Talleyrand.

Your Imperial Highness. Or was it Royal Highness? Ah, what does it matter. Neither of them has been very high, in truth, have they?

Talleyrand’s voice has grown hoarse, and Eugène suspects that hidden under all the make-up is the face of an old man, even if the body looks young and healthy – with one peculiarity: The clubfoot that has troubled Monsieur de Talleyrand so much during his lifetime has turned into a hoof.

I see that death has stripped you of your former good manners, Prince de Benevent. Nevertheless, it has been good to learn that even a version of you exists in this afterlife. But as I have no desire to see myself insulted any further by the two of you, please allow me to wish you a good day and to take my leave.

Yes, go, go. If it had been anyone but you I might at least have asked him to join our troupe. As you can see, we are still quite in need of attractions. Monsieur Metternich is in one of the waggons though. He aspires to become a knife thrower, yet so far his attempts to frame a female assistant with knifes have had dire consequences. Truth be told, we are desperate enough to still hire him or anyone else for the arena. But, as you should be aware yourself, unfortunately nobody is as little suited for the limelight as you.

That need not be a bad thing. - The juggler has taken to practicing again, the balls circling over his head in a flurry of coulors, reminding Eugène of a rainbow, or of a painter’s palette. - Unfortunately neither the prince nor his sister, despite all she claimed, ever learned to truly embrace this.

A pair of eyes empty of all emotion stare at Eugène from behind the fox mask.

Becoming invisible is a most powerful thing, little prince. Aspiring to be nothing… maybe you should have learned in time to make the most of it?

How would he have done that though? Nothing and its sister, Everything, are too powerful concepts for one like him to grasp.

Eugène has had enough. He bows briefly, because that is what one does, then he quickly leaves the weird circus troupe without even trying to search out its third member. He hopes that those three old traitors indeed will turn each others’ hours in this afterlife to hell.

But knowing them, they still will find a way to thrive, and to start mischief.

Eugène breathes a sigh of relief when the circus waggons have disappeared behind a line of trees. With new determination, he continues his way to find Monsieur Goya.

.~.~.

((OOC: This is merely an introduction post. A while back on the discord rp server, it was mentioned that we do not have many antagonists in these afterlifes. Maybe this circus troupe can fill that void if need be. Whoever wants to use them in an rp scenario is free to do so. They probably have the means to go from one place to another really quickly, and may show up in different masks or professions as well.))

[flowwochair]

Sorry if you have received this question before (and no need to answer publicly or even at all if you don't feel like it; that's my usual disclaimer 😊).

So I know you're a big Bessières-Murat shipper, that's why I hope you may be able to help me out. I've read several times (in English publications, as far as I can remember) that Murat and Bessières indeed were close friends. Have you come across anything that supports this assumption? Because I've been looking and so far I've come up with nothing except Bessières being a witness ("cousin") at Murat's wedding. Which is far from unusual for Bessie. The list of correspondence in the French Archives only seems to have official military documents they exchanged - but no less than 22 letters "of predominantly private nature" (sic!) Bessières received from Eugène de Beauharnais. And considering Murat and Eugène were not exactly best friends...

If you have more examples of private relations between Murat and Bessières, I would love to learn about them!

Thank you in advance! 💝

AAAAA I SAW THIS ASK THIS MORNING BUT FORGOT TO ANSWER I AM SO SORRY!!! I know that Murat and Bessières met when they were in school (College of Saint-Michel at Cahors) then went on to serve in the same guard (Constitutional Guard). It would seem to me that Murat initiated the friendship, although I have seen someone people say that it was Bessières so on that I am uncertain, but Murat seems to have been the one usually dragging Bessières around with him. One of the biggest factors contributing to this sort of historical blurriness regarding their relationship is the fact Bessières had a whole LOT of his personal letters burnt by his own command shortly before he died, likely including a lot of his correspondence with Murat. Regarding his friendship with Eugène, given Murat's nature and attitude, I feel like if that truly made him uncomfortable/paranoid he would have dropped Bessières immediately and/or taken a passive-aggressive or straight up hostile attitude with him which he does not seem to have taken from what I know; this could either mean that maybe he didn't view this friendship as a threat or he cared too much about Bessières to drop him (which is the cute option that I prefer bgdhjhdfjdf). I know a couple of rumour-style stories of Murat begging Bessières to drop out with him, or Murat convincing Bessières to sneak out with him at night when they were in school but these are just stories from somewhat unreliable sources regardless of how much I'd love to believe them TwT. I mainly ship them because I love their dynamic, especially stemming back from when they met where Bessières was the perfect golden boy and Murat was the unpredictable chaotic little fuzzball. I also love their relationship stemming back so far to the point they made such a genuine connection, when they met again in Italy Murat seemed to still hold the same affection for Bessières. I also have never read about Bessières resenting Murat on any personal level, even after his betrayal, if anything Bessières seemed to become even more miserable after Napoleon essentially blacklisted Murat, but this might be my biased reading of it since there were a lot of other factors making Bessières miserable at that time (600k of debt, post-Russian campaign, lots of comrade deaths, etc.). I hope some of this info helped, some of it is listed in their wikis actually! I have a messy scrambled time with my sources so if I find deeper ones I'll lyk TwT. TLDR; i am the crazy bessimu person i love bessimu so much bcuz theyre adorable childhood friends who seemed to never stop caring about each other.

[adarkrainbow]

Question: In the world of fairy tales, how much the concept of "wishing" is really important?

Obviously, "Wishful thinking" and "careful what you wish for" are important tropes of the fairy tale genre, but I never considered them to be genre defining or that much important for the narratives.

But the upcoming Disney film Wish made me rethink some things.

While the film itself is meant to celebrate Disney animation and their history of "quest for a dream" and "dreams come true" tropes, I wonder how much of these tropes have any basis on the original folk tales or the literary tales inspired by them.

Disney made the connection between fairy tales and "wishing", but they seem not to be the first or the only ones.

On the most famous example besides Disney, Sondheim's Into the Woods seamed to think there was a link between the Grimm and English fairy tales and the concept of wishing, to the point it's a foundational plot point to the story.

The Frog King or the Frog Prince, a tale that is known to always open the Grimm's fairy tale collection across several editions, literally starts as:

"IN the old times, when it was still of some use to wish for the thing one wanted, [...]"

or depending on the translation

"IN the olden time, when wishing was having, [...]"

Well wishes DEFINITIVELY are a key part of fairytales, but maybe not in the sense we understand today...

As in the idea of "wishes coming true" all on their own is something purely Disney like. I can't say anything about the Grimm stories, but when it comes to French fairytales the idea of wishing is definitively present... But as a "desire".

For example, good fairies and fairy godmothers keep granting people's wishes in French literary fairytales. But they just do not pop up whenever someone makes a wish. For example take Cinderella, in Perrault's version, the fairy godmother asks Cinderella if she wishes (aka wants) to go to the ball, and since she says yes, the fairy godmother agrees to grant her the wish - but she does mention "and since you have been so good". This is a recurring topic in these French fairytales - wishes are granted as rewards for a good action or a good behavior, just wishing in itself does nothing (as Perrault evokes in some of his fairytales morals "Sometimes all you need to be rewarded in life... is to have a fairy godmother because else you're stuck in your misery.") There is also very often the topic of a fairy asking a person they want to reward to choose between various gifts and select precisely which "wish" they want more than another. For example there was this story by madame de Murat called "Anguillette" where a fairy saved by a princess offers her three possible gifts: wealth, beauty or intelligence, and she tells her to carefully make her "wish". (Though this fairytale is actually a twist on the trope of the choice since, unlike other fairies in this situation, this fairy ends up giving the princess all three gifts at once just because she is that good - but that's an exception)

In folk-fairytales the topic of wish is also present, but more in the "be careful what you wish for". Just recently I read a folkloric tale about the wife of a man who was friend with a local magical dwarf - and to obtain a horse (or a cow I can't remember exactly), the magical dwarf told the wife to go to a nearby village of dwarfs. But he warned her to be very precise in how she formulates her "wish" - for example she has to precise that the beast must have ears, eyes, legs... And ultimately she does get the animal, but forgets one thing in her specifications: the tail.

So I am speaking here only for the French branch of fairytales - but given Disney was as much inspired by them as by the Grimms I think it is a fair standing point. Wishes, the concept of granted wishes is definitively present in fairytales, for sure... But not the "power of wishes". Wishes in fairytales as a symbol of hope, wishes coming true all on their own because you "believe", wishes as just a power and force in itself, is something that is definitively part of Disney's specific brand and topic. Because in French fairytales, a wish is either a request/desire made to a supernatural being, or a reward for a good behavior. Wish is not "hope" but "desire" ; and yes wishes are granted, but as in "what you desire the most will be granted" ; and they are not granted randomly just because you believe. They are granted because you were a good person in the eyes of a supernatural power - a supernatural power which might force you to choose between specific options what you "wish" or "desire" more. And sometimes, fairies don't even grant the wishes, but go against them. I am not even speaking of wicked fairies, but good fairies too!

Take Donkeyskin. This is something that was very highlighted and focused on by the musical movie adaptation, but that was already present as a one-line joke in the original text: the princess, before fleeing the castle, ends up not wanting to fight her father's incestuous desire. She doesn't particularly wish to escape or to not be loved by her father - it is the fairy godmother that has to point out to her that no, this is not a good situation, and it is her that will force her to do all sorts of things she did not ask for. Similarly in these literary fairytales, a lot of the time good fairies are actually here to warn people that what they wish is dangerous, or that what they desire will be self-destructive or cause everybody harm. So overall, while wishes are present in French fairytales, they are not very prominent or important in themselves - rather, the logic of these fairytales is one of reward and punishment, and one of desire both good and bad - desire granted or desire denied, desire encouraged or desire fought off.

And in fact.... A lot of the time these supernatural rewards are not even based on wishes. Very often supernatural beings just decide on their own what would be the most fitting reward. For example take "Diamonds and toads" - the girl never wished for the riches given to her by the fairy, but that's her reward. Or rather, an example more telling would be a VERY famous fairytale of France. Its most famous version is from Bretagne, but it exists in numerous regions of France and was even found in northern Africa - it is the story of "The two hunchbacks and the (insert your local supernatural being here)". In France it is a lutin, or a variation of the lutin/dwarf (in Bretagne, the korrigan). The principle is always the same: there are two brothers who are hunchbacks, one is good one is bad. The good brother ends up stumbling one night upon a party of dancing and singing magical little beings, and he makes the party even merrier/plays well some music instrument/completes an unfinished songs of the lutins. The lutins decide to reward them - and without asking him what he want, or without the good brother asking anything, they remove his hunch, making him a normal man. When the bad brother, envious of the good brother's fate, goes to the same lutin party but acts poorly there, he demands a reward - and this reward is the hump of his brother, added onto his own.

This is something very prominent in these folk-tales: do not ask for a reward out of the blue. Only ask for a reward if you are offered a voice, only wish for something if the supernatural being encourages you to wish for something or allows you to. To ask for something, to enforce your wish upon a supernatural being, always turns up badly. A variation of the two brothers tale is even more revealing of this theme: in this story, the good brother is offered to choose between lot of gold, or having his hump removed. And when the bad brother arrives, he demands "what my brother left behind", meaning the gold - but the lutins/dwarfs/korrigans/fairies decide to understand it as "the hunched-back my brother left behind".

Because this is something that is very prominently said in literary fairytales of France: fairies (and other assorted supernatural beings) are not low-beings or powerless creatures. They are not to be commanded, they are very high on the social AND cosmic hierarchy. Fairies for examples, in French fairytales, are repeatedly said to be either equal to kings and queens - or SUPERIOR to any kind of human royalty that exists. This is notably why so many of them end up being godmothers of princes and princesses, or marrying kings, or making ennemies out of royalty. Again, fairies and other enchanters of French classical-literary fairytales are inheritors of the gods and goddesses of the Greco-Roman mythology, crossed with some folk-Christianity of saints and Virgin Mary, so there's still this idea that the human is naturally inferior to the supernatural, and should always treat it with respect. Just like how you do not ask a king to gift you something, you do not ask a fairy to grant you a wish - else you want it interpreted in a bad way. You rather do good things in hope of gaining the king's favor so he rewards you.

Anyway, after twisted digressions, to return to your original post: as you said, the topic of "wishes" is not as genre-defining as it might seem today. Disney really took this element and expanded it and focused the light on it and insisted upon it, to the point that we can say definitively today that the topic of the "power of wishes" IS a defining genre of the Disney fairytale. But it does not mean wishes and their importance wasn't in fairytales before... But the wishes themselves did not have the power - the supernatural beings had the power and granted the wishes. Hope in these traditional fairytales isn't about wishing something or believing in something. In these fairytales manifesting "hope" means staying kind and true and good-working and gentle to everybody and everyone and enduring all your pain and all your hardships and miseries, because doing so might earn you the favor or pity of a powerful cosmic royalty who will decide to reward you by granting you what you desire the most or what is the best for you. If someone simply wishes something, it probably won't come true in a fairytale - the best way to make sure your wish comes true is to go feed old hungry women and save frogs from being eaten by birds ; but if you just "wish upon a star", you'll probably get nothing. However if you cry out your heart upon some given plants or in front of some given birds, they might help you by bringing you good counsel or some food - but no wish granting.

And as I said, even then, your personal wish and desire ultimately might not be what is actually good for you, and many warning tales of the literary fairytale era were about "Here's how you will die when your wish is granted". Typical Psyche and Cupid tale: the wife wants to see her husband, and this wish leads her to lose everything. Typical Beauty and the Beast tale: the girl wishes to go to her family, and it almost kills the beast. And of course, the wishes and demands and desires of bad people ultimately become their undoing... Unless you are one of those fairytale antagonists with a fairy godmother on your side, in which case your wish and demands become the main reason the protagonists are suffering (madame d'Aulnoy's The Blue Bird is the most revealing case, as it is the first French literary fairytale where the evil step-sisters gets a fairy godmother who ends up cursing the princess' beloved into the titular blue-bird, simply because she does everything she can to please and grant the wishes of the person she is the godmother of).

As for the Grimm fairytales... I honestly do not think wishing is an important part of them? Wishing does get its fair share in French fairytales in a very nuance and complex take ; but the Grimms? Beyond the line you evoked in the Frog Prince, where are the wishes in Hansel and Gretel, The Wolf and the Seven Goats, The Robber Bridegroom? There is Rapunzel but the mother's desire is not a wish, rather a craving. There's Snow-White, where indeed the wish comes true - but it backfires massively since in the original version the mother ends up hating her own daughter, and in the later version the mother dies soon after giving birth. But beyond that? I don't see many wish-stories. Oh yes, except the Fisherman and his Wife - a very traditional "wish" story, but even then... Wishes are depicted as ultimately negative, since the wife is driven by greed and ambition that augments with every wish.

So yes, Disney probably is the only one of the entire corpus of fairytales who decided to depict wishes as purely and entirely good.

[le-brave-des-braves]

why does jomini hate berthier so much???

Cher anonyme,

since the Marshal is busy yelling at that entitled treacherous idiot, allow me to give you a brief explanation.

The marshal is a good man, a kind-hearted person and always supports those he deems worthy and talented. And that’s why, once in Switzerland, he found this office rat whom Murat rejected before. He has read his essays and got so excited that he even decided to finance his book and took him as voluntary AdC.

I haven’t had so many occasions to get to know him but every time we spoke, he sounded like he thinks he’s superior to anyone else. The way he always said “As I have predicted” always boiled my blood and sometimes even the Marshal seemed to desire nothing more than whacking him.

And he just kept gaining more and more responsibilities, eventually becoming a chief of staff to Ney. He insisted that Jomini is a capable man and I admit he was not bad, not at all. But he was a Swiss, and as you know, he didn’t share the same loyalty to La Patrie as we all did.

When I became an AdC, the animosity between Jomini and Berthier already started. The Emperor was truly impressed with Jomini’s strategic skills and that possibly only fed the jealousy.

Then, according to Jomini, The prince of Moscow recommended him for a promotion, and Berthier just deleted his name. That is not pleasant, but myself I have been waiting for a promotion for years despite multiple requests from my Marshal.

And I did NOT defect to Russians.

What I would like to tell to Jomini: Life is not fair, Jomini, deal with it. I don’t hold any love for Berthier myself, but joking about his death is disgusting. All the admirable skills and you just provided them to the enemy.

You should not have returned.

Cpt Octave Levavasseur

[usergreenpixel]

MALMAISON MEDIA SALON SOIRÉE 21: THE ACADÉMIE (2012)

1. The Introduction

Welcome, welcome, welcome! Did you miss me?! I missed you too!

Life has been hectic, but I’m back with a review of a book I came across by accident while browsing Goodreads. The setting of Madame Campan’s school isn’t used that much and has a potential, so of course I was interested.

The book itself is seemingly only available for purchase so far. On websites like Amazon that is. I couldn’t find it in the database of archive.org at least. But perhaps someone will upload it in the future.

Anyway, I’m always a sucker for more obscure media, so let’s proceed with the review already!

(Dedicated to @pobodleru and @josefavomjaaga )

2. The Summary

“Eliza Monroe, daughter of a wealthy Virginia lawyer, is sent to France by her family to get a better education fit for a lady.

At the school, she is quickly roped into manipulation games between two bitter enemies: Hortense de Beauharnais and Caroline Bonaparte.

Each of the girls will also experience love, betrayal and many other aspects of growing up.”

Coming of age stories are a classic for a reason, so let’s see how this concept is executed!

(Trigger warning for mentions of physical abuse, murder and suicide.)

3. The Story

First of all, there are too many POVs. Eliza, Caroline and Hortense EACH have their own POV chapters, where they narrate their side of the story in first person.

While this concept of switching between POVs could potentially work, the problem here is that there is too much switching, which gets very annoying and confusing. Basically, too damn much of a good writing device.

Secondly, for a fairly interesting premise, the story doesn’t do squat with it for two thirds of the book. Eliza doesn’t pick sides, characters don’t develop properly and the love subplots don’t get resolved.

For two. Fucking. THIRDS. Of the book!

The conflicts only get sort of resolved in the final third of the book, which, as you can probably imagine, just isn’t enough time to do it properly. And guess what! The author DROPS THE BALL WITH THE RESOLUTION and, as a result, nothing makes sense like she pulled the resolution out of her ass.

Another side effect is that the characters barely change at all over the course of the story, when growing up after facing adversity is the entire point of a coming of age story!

Which brings us to…

4. The Characters

I don’t like Eliza Monroe. The problem isn’t that she is a bratty teenager, by the way. The problem is that she doesn’t change over the course of the story and barely has agency, especially in the beginning.

Hortense and Caroline just play her like a fiddle most of the time, while Eliza herself just waits for something juicy to happen so she can gossip with her mother via letters.

Eliza is just a character blander than unseasoned oatmeal.

Caroline Bonaparte, as usual, is the bad guy. She is a selfish, manipulative cunt who only cares about herself and MAYBE Murat. Then she suddenly speed runs a sort of a redemption arc in the end, and even then it’s ambiguous if it was genuine or not.

Hortense de Beauharnais is supposed to be the good character, depicted by the narrative as better than Caroline in every way and almost beatified by the story.

Unfortunately, this makes her lack depth too and makes it very jarring when she does really shitty things, like trying to drive a wedge between Eugéne and his love interest due to believing that said love interest is unworthy of her brother and should know her place.

She never gets called out on her bullshit either! Our saintly Hortense, Neighbors! Oh, and she has an inappropriate relationship with her stepfather! Or well, implications of such a tryst.

Eugéne is a cinnamon roll personified. At least, until her accidentally kills his love interest, Madeleine. Supposedly, this happens because Madeleine is unstable due to enduring abuse and pining for Eugéne, yet all that happens is that she gets conveniently killed off by Eugéne and we never get to see if she truly was unstable or not. We are TOLD this, but not shown evidence.

By the way, Madeleine had the most potential out of all the important characters. An aspiring biracial actress horribly abused by her jealous, drug-addicted mother and pining for Eugéne, hoping to be rescued like in a fairy tale.

Madeleine is depicted fairly realistically, in my opinion, but then she is suddenly killed off to conveniently resolve the conflict of Josephine not accepting her as a match for Eugéne. No buildup, no significant consequences, ZILCH! Only Eugéne seems shaken by her death, but we aren’t really shown much of this either, merely TOLD.

Josephine, while definitely capable of kindness, has her own selfish bitchy moments, like not giving a fuck that Madeleine died or that Eugéne is shaken up by accidentally killing her. Her own past as a slave owner is also mostly conveniently omitted and she isn’t shown as being called out for it, unlike Eliza, who IS called out for thinking slavery is normal.

Letizia Bonaparte is a scheming snake just like Caroline, almost to cartoonish levels.

Napoleon Bonaparte is a stereotypical shortie, and also almost being a pervert to his stepdaughter. Ewww…

Madame Campan is a stereotypical kind and strict mentor.

So yeah. Most characters don’t feel interesting at all.

5. The Setting

The setting is mostly just mediocre, with occasional common cliches like claiming Robespierre REIGNED in France or that nobility during Frev was automatically in danger. But these are far from the worst offenders, so eh.

The descriptions are surprisingly good though, in that they are integrated into the book in a balanced way, so here at least one win for the author!

6. The Writing

Problems with the writing start WITH THE TITLE. More specifically, combining French spelling of a noun with an English article. “THE ACADÉMIE”, “THE TERREUR”, etc.

It’s unjustified and clunky at best. At worst, it looks like the author is just throwing in French words because the book is set in France. I would understand if it was a foreign character trying to show off and making these weird mistakes, but ALL CHARACTERS speak like that!

It’s… definitely an odd choice.

Other than that, however, a bit of props to the author for at least trying to write realistic bratty teenagers.

7. The Conclusion

Honestly, this book isn’t the worst I’ve ever seen. Not by a long shot. However, I would still recommend to give it a hard pass. It’s not bad. Not even so bad that it’s funny. And not even rage inducing.

Just… meh. Bland. Nothing to write home about.

On that note, I declare this Soirée at the Malmaison Media Salon as finished. Hope you stay tuned for more future reviews though!

Love,

Citizen Green Pixel

[askgeraudduroc]

Lameth comes riding in fast into Duroc’s afterlife, looking serious. He jumps off the horse just in front of the cottage door and knocks. When Duroc greets him-

Lameth: Bonjour, Your Excellency. No time for the usual pleasantries, I’m afraid, so let me make this quick - Murat has gone into Bessières’ domain to seek him. Before leaving, Murat told Soult that if Murat does not respond after many hours, Soult should send a rescue party in. My Marshal has decided to keep this expedition small, as he was was warned to not bring obvious weapons or look intimidating. Thus, it will be my Marshal and Lannes, with myself and Petiet assisting.

However, he has tasked me with asking if you wish to join us.

If you do, gather what you can and hop on my horse- I will take us to where the Marshal is making preparations. If not, I will return later with what I hope to be good news! But make your decision quick! I must return to @murillo-enthusiast with the answer soon.

If you do come with me, do not worry about Helene, Brun is ready to take her for emergency babysitting! I assure you, she will be in good hands with him and Madame la Maréchale.

I...

*Duroc quickly shut his lips, having a expression filled with both worry and guilt. He looks down, not focusing his sight on anything to come quickly with an answer*

...It was my fault that Bessieres went into his domain in the first place. It should be just right to me to just... Leave him be and take his time.

But... If something were to happen to Murat, Soult, Lannes, and to you guys... I would never forgive myself.

I will go, and face the consequences of my actions. So please, let me get ready quickly.

[adelemadouce]

Mazurka

These last days of 1804 were filled with activities purely for pleasure. Every day there was some kind of celebration somewhere that had to be planned, prepared, rehearsed and finally announced. We received invitations to balls, soirées, receptions and concerts almost every day. During the day I was busy with new wardrobes for all these celebrations, radiant robes in silky satin, in fresh colors, vanilla, lilac, rosé, and of course peach! For all occasions I wore the matching slim-cut empire dress in my own style, and every now and then I saw myself being copied by elegant ladies. It was very amusing! On one occasion I received a compliment from Madame La Maréchal Berthier, who was a very nice person whom I liked and who always amazed me when she appeared on the arm of her husband's mistress, the proud Madame Visconti. "Dear child, your fashion is certainly advantageous for a slender silhouette like yours, but with feminine curves like ours (Mme Berthier and Mme Visconti had almost identical figures) your style would forbid us from breathing!" She giggled. Both women had ample breasts.

"But Madame, ...you should show your waist, every woman should! This narrow crotch gives women with a full bust an exciting figure! Your seamstress doesn't need much skill to do that. Just try it!" The Empress had overheard our conversation and said with a smile: " Our Adèle is going to turn all our heads!"

Oh, that was not my intention at all! I was overjoyed that I had turned a certain person's head, and turned it big time! Between all these splendid events there were numerous hours of sensual amusement for me and the Emperor. However, we had not made any progress with our "mirror thing". The Emperor sometimes got annoyed (which I really liked!) when I couldn't follow his instructions. "Concentrate, sweetie...and keep your eyes open! Look in the mirror!" But all I could do when he took me so hard was beg him not to stop! I whimpered: "...don't stop...don't stop!" with my eyes closed. Then he looked at me grimly (which is just heavenly when he does that!) and thundered at me in a loud voice: "My God, what's so difficult about that?!" I had been sitting on his thighs and felt his hard member beneath me, but then I slipped into the sheets, lay on my back and smiled. He was kneeling next to me and looking down at me angrily. "And if you demonstrate it to me, Sire? You must show me how to keep your eyes open while doing it!" It's really amazing how much his face can change from one second to the next. One minute his face was filled with iron-hard anger and the next moment it's replaced by a soft smile, as if the sun was breaking through the dark clouds. "What is this? Are you giving orders to your Emperor already, young lady?" He lay down next to me and kissed me sweetly. "You want me to show you?" I couldn't answer right away, his tongue was in my throat. He licked my chin as I nodded and gave the command: "Do it! Show me how it's done!" A while later I watched his face as he looked up in the mirror; he was more aroused than I was because I had pleasured him with my mouth beforehand. He looked in the mirror as seriously as if he were watching a military operation. The Emperor lifted my hips, thrust harder, looked in the mirror, thrust, thrust, thrust, looked...closed his eyes and roared so loudly that the walls shook. He had closed his eyes! My little fists pounded on his shoulders: "...your eyes closed! You had your eyes closed!" He buried his face on my neck and started laughing. We both laughed. It was marvelous! I simply couldn't imagine a couple experiencing happier moments than we did!

But then the Emperor made a mistake. It happened at the Murat's Christmas ball at the Élysée Palace. I had attended Madame Campan's institute for several years with Princess Caroline Murat, Napoléon's youngest sister. Caroline and I were both so different that we could never really get to know each other. I believed (and still believe it) that she was actually a nice young woman, but one who had no values whatsoever, which probably was due to the lack of upbringing from a father. Her always arrogant manner gave her something unsympathetic, even frightening. Who want to be friends with a woman, who had no empathy at all and would drop you just as quickly as she had reached out to you? While still a schoolgirl and before she married Murat, she boasted about her future love life with her husband in a manner, which made us girls blush with shame. And Caroline had found the perfect husband in Murat! The Emperor himself despised the tall Gascon. "He is certainly one of my best men, but the guy has no morals! He always has to have a woman near him. Even in the field he needs his whores. And at home he screwed his wife's chaperone behind a curtain!" I wanted to avoid the Murats, but this was not easy given my Empress's obligations to them.

Well, you can't imagine the magnificence and splendor of the imperial balls if you haven't seen it! The Murat's had not yet fully moved into the Élysée Palace, some parts of the palace were still being renovated, but the grand ballroom sparkled in the light of candles and mirrors as if it were the palace of angels. A true Elysium!

That evening I was sitting on a padded bench at the edge of the dance floor, next to the old Duchesse de Chevreuse. Behind me stood Duchâtel, who was talking to Monsieur Denon, the curator of the Louvre Museum. The Grand Marshal stood a little way off in his white gala uniform. I smiled at him, Duroc bowed and stood there as if nailed to the spot. When the orchestra started playing, I eagerly awaited my first dance. My dance card was full! I was besieged by the most attractive gentlemen: Sigismond, Rapp, the young Périgord, Jules de Canouville, Flahaut le Coucou! The young men were all adjutants and were among the most sought-after bachelors at court. I held my fan open and waved it gently in front of my cleavage. As the dance floor filled up, I saw Sigismond coming towards me. I had promised him the first Contré. Just as he bowed to me, the Grand Marshal approached him and whispered a few words. Sigismond clicked his heels together, bowed to me again and left. I didn't understand. Sigismond went back to the group of gentlemen, from which he had come. The gentlemen whispered and gave me regretful looks. I looked questioningly at Duroc, but the Grand Marshal ignored me! Then my eyes searched for the Emperor. He was strolling through the groups of guests with Berthier and Murat, chatting with the ladies, flirting with the Empress, in good spirits. I felt frozen and just couldn't believe it. Dance after dance was played, but no one came to ask me anymore. The Emperor approached me and Mme de Chevreuse. He stopped behind our bench, I felt his gaze on my neck, my shoulders. I laid my fan over my hard thimbles; I did not want him to see them. A waltz was played. I saw Églée and Michel Ney on the dance floor. They were the most beautiful couple of the court! From behind I heard Murat ask: "...peach flavored, Sire?" The Emperor answered with his sonor voice: "...the sweetest juice in the world! But you have to suck the juice preferably straight from the fruit...so delicious!" Of course he wanted me to hear it. I stared at the dance floor. The couples spun before my eyes, the ladies' silk rustled, how I would have loved to dance with them! Behind me the Emperor said: "...ahh, the Ney's! We look forward to their performance." The Ney's waltz dance performance was one of the highlights of the imperial balls. The couple whirled across the dance floor in perfect harmony. Églée floated in her husband's arms, both smiling and all the guests, without exception, watched them as they both celebrated their love. But the best moment came when the dance ended, the couple slowed down and finally stopped. They both looked at each other, Michel touched his wife's chin and bent his face down to hers. He kissed her gently at first, then more strongly, until Églée threw her arms around his neck and they both kissed uninhibitedly! The Emperor began to applaud, someone whistled, finally everyone applauded. The couple ended the kiss, both turned to the Emperor, Églée sank into a curtsy and Michel bowed. When the next dance began, the Emperor suddenly stepped next to the bench I was sitting on, leaned towards me and whispered in my ear: "We both can do that better!" He got up and left. All I noticed was that everyone, absolutely everyone! had seen it. - The Emperor whispered something in Madame Duchâtel's ear!

It was Eugène who saved me. He came straight up to me, bowed and offered me his arm. I had already stood up, hoping to save what could be saved of my reputation. Now on Eugène's arm I approached the nearest footman, who bent down and gave me my train. Eugène put his arm around my waist and we spun the Mazurka with the other couples. Duroc did not intervene, so this dance with Eugène was allowed! My admirers also found new courage. Sigismond and Rapp did not let me out of their sight. "...and now all of Paris will be wondering: what did he whisper in her ear?" Eugène smiled and continued. "...I advise you, Adèle, just make something up. Whatever it is, just tell people something! Even if Maman asks you...and she will!...tell her something, just not the truth!" We continued to turn. "Maman probably didn't notice that the Emperor refused to let the adjutants dance with you, but she will find out at some point. Deny knowing about it, Adèle... just deny it! Maman uses the same method to keep her position!" Eugène held me tenderly, I felt safe in his arms. "Can I ask you one question, Adèle,...just one?" I looked up at him with wide eyes. "Of course, mon cher cousin!" He was no longer smiling, but looked at me worried. "Do you love him, Adèle?" I swallowed and lowered my gaze, disturbed. I was shaking. "...so much!!!" Eugène stated. He sighed and looked over my head at the dancing couples. "...then it's all worth it!" Suddenly the Grand Marshal stood next to us. "Your Imperial Highness, do you permit me to abduct Madame Duchâtel?" We stopped and Eugène held my hand tightly. "...only with great reluctance, Your Excellency!" But he knew that he could not object. Eugène therefore leaned over my hand, which was in a long white glove, and kissed it. "Please think of my advices, Madame, and remember that I will always be your servant!"

When he had gone, I linked arms with Duroc. "He knows!" I said, looking up at him. Duroc put his hand on mine, protectively. "Many people know, Adèle!" He added quietly: "...the Emperor is happy with you, he cannot and will not hide it any longer!" An unknown fear rose within me. "And the consequences...am I supposed to bear?" But Duroc immediately reassured me: " There will be no consequences! You must not forget, Adèle, that the Emperor is free to do whatever he wants!" Duroc stopped. "You should be happy, Adèle. If you were just a momentary romance for the Emperor, he would treat the affair with discretion. But you are much more to him, and he has apparently decided to let the world know this!" I was desperate and appealed to Duroc as my protector. "But why? He's putting me in great danger! I don't want to be the center of attention like that....I'm afraid of it!" Duroc's eyes wandered to Duchâtel, who was watching me and the Grand Marshal curiously. "The Emperor can explain that to you best himself. I have been instructed to take you to the palace. Please, Adèle, inform your husband that you will be coming home later!" I went to Duchâtel and told him that I had been called to the palace. "What did the Emperor whisper to you, Adèle?" Duchâtel wanted to know. "Nothing!" I turned around and left him standing there. I knew Duchâtel, he would ask me about it many times in the next few days.

It was the first time I had been taken to the Tuileries late at night. Duroc led me to the first floor, to the Emperor's apartments. All the doors opened before me as if by magic. I was afraid that I would be taken to the Emperor's secret boudoir, that small, intimate chamber in which he had last received Madame de Vaudey. I did not want to be taken to that boudoir under any circumstances! Fortunately, Duroc took me to a small antechamber that was usually reserved for dignitaries. It was heated, a fire were burning and candles were lit. On a small table stood a carafe with Cognac and a tray with small fruit cakes and belgian pralinés. "Sit down, Adèle, ...make yourself comfortable. It may take a while." Duroc gallantly helped me out of my satin coat. He laid it on a chair and then disappeared. I sat down on a small sofa and pulled my legs up, I was tired. At some point that evening, I poured myself a cognac. And then another...and another. I must have fallen asleep then. Someone had grabbed my shoulders and was shaking me gently. "Adéle...wake up!" I saw the Emperor's face in front of me, behind him, at the foot of the sofa, stood Duroc. "Wake up, chérie!" The Emperor suddenly grimaced and turned his head back. "Oh dear, my little one is drunk!" He held his hand in front of his nose; I seemed to have a horrible smell of alcohol on my breath. "What did you do, Adèle?" I was now fully awake. "I drank a glass of cognac." The Emperor sat down next to me. "One glass...or the whole bottle?" He laughed heartily, stroked my tired face and said: "I know I really messed up tonight...forgive me, my darling, I was too cocky!" Despite my breath, he kissed me on the mouth. "Can you forgive me, Adèle?" I took his hand and kissed it. "Sire, I am not suited to scandalous appearances! I am too afraid of them! And what should I say to the Empress now? That is what I am most afraid of...!" The Emperor exchanged a glance with Duroc. "Listen to me, chérie...I will smooth things over again!" He bent his head close to me. "....I will sleep with the Empress...it will make her submissive again....she will forgive me everything!" I looked helplessly at his mouth. "But will she forgive me too, Sire?" I felt so miserable, which was also due to the cognac, and I still longed for him to calm me down. He could! "It's not your fault at all, my sweet! You haven't done anything wrong. The Empress knows that...and she will leave you alone, I will make sure of that! Don't you trust your Emperor?" I was able to smile again and put his hand on my heart. The Emperor immediately grabbed my little breast. "The Grand Marshal has a surprise for you," the Emperor then said. I looked up at Duroc. "Yes, Madame, I have. The Empress is going to Malmaison for a few days. You will be able to spend this time here in the palace with the Emperor!"

Yes, that was indeed a surprise! The Emperor beamed, his eyes sparkled. "Are you happy? You will sleep in my bed...in the Emperor's bed! I will show you everything...how do you like that...hmm?...my sweet Adèle?" I nodded smiling. "Oh, that sounds wonderful, Sire!" But Napoléon noticed that I wasn't really happy about it. "Are you still afraid?" He took me in his arms, kissed my neck. Duroc disappeared discreetly, leaving me alone with the Emperor. "Sire, please, don't make me a 'maîtresse en titre'....I'm just a little lady-in-waiting...and not a courtesan!" He sighed. "I love you, Adèle...and I want to shout it out to the world! I know it's unwise...I don't do it again, I promise!" He kissed me passionately. Then he hummed with pleasure, it was amazing how quickly I could arouse him. "...ahh, look what you have done now!" He chuckled. I saw the bulge in his breeches. "....the Empress will be able to enjoy it. She should thank you, chérie!" I grabbed the bulge and heard him whisper in my ear: "I'm not sending you out into the cold night, my darling. You have court duty tomorrow...very good! Duroc will take you to your apartment right away. Rest. Sleep! I'll be back tomorrow morning...at nine!" He freed himself from my arms and left. Outside the door I heard him saying to Duroc: "What should I do?...this girl makes me so horny that I could turn the world upside down!"

But I didn't want that! No! I didn't want that at all!

.

[the-adventures-of-lydia-brown]

what have you witnessed of the dead frenchmen that you have met? what are your opinions on them?

Hmm, let me think...

I met Monsieur Bory first and I found him most agreeable. I can relate to his curiosity and scientific excitement very much. I wish him nothing but the best of luck in his future endeavours.

... Marshal Soult, the Duke of Dalmatia. As proud as he is competent, and twice as intimidating. Honestly, I was a bit afraid he'd just send me away as fast as I came when I announced I could provide musical support, especially as I wasn't exactly sure about the specifics myself. I have to say, I was really relieved that my assumption regarding this realm proved correct and my presence was actually helpful. I can't imagine how his aides maintain their cheerful attitude and continue to get into trouble occasionally... But then again, maybe I'm the one who's too easily affected by the expectations and demands of those around me...

I cannot leave out the one who stood up for me in the above-mentioned situation, Marshal Lannes.

Steady as a wall of stone, ever the shoulder to lean on (- even stand on. From this point of view, he truly is a giant -)

I really hope he has someone to share his troubles with, if or when they are too much for one man to take, I hope he has someone who truly understands him.

Someone not unlike General Duroc, the Duke of Frioul. But he, too, would and did tear himself apart to make sure everything goes smoothly and no-one else gets hurt. He lays so much weight on his shoulders - shoulders that, when last I left him, didn't even have the corresponding limbs attached. He deserves his rest. His value does not only lie in his silent, often thankless endeavours.

Thus we get to the King of Naples, to Marshal Joachim Murat, whom I didn't have the chance to meet until the mission was over. His reputation preceded him to me and is quite correct. Sparkling, flamboyant and a free spirit, he seems very wholehearted about all he does. I'm... really glad he didn't take offence when I... yelled at him. I suppose when you're accustomed to throwing yourself into danger, you inevitably tend to get a little more casual with potential hazards...

Now we get to the people who aren't exactly frenchmen and those I haven't exactly met.

First of them, the Queen of Naples, Caroline Murat. A formidable lady, confident and able to sway many situations the way she wants. But I think most often what she wants is simply whatever's best for the people she loves.

Then Louise Soult, who, when I saw her, was taking care of little Helene. She looked really proficient. I must admit the responsibility of taking care of a child intimidates me a little personally - one must have empathy, attention, think strategically and often outside the box! But little Helene did seem to be a darling, definitely taking after Duroc in her cheerful nature...

Which brings me to the last person, one I haven't exactly met, but one I can still claim to know something about - Marshal Bessières, the Duke of Istria. Reserved, passionate, sociable, reclusive, immaculate, flawed - quite aware that the world is a stage, ready and eager to play his role. To have one's demons manifest so physically... I can imagine he must have squashed them under his heel whenever they threatened to rear their heads, unsure where he can let them out, when he can be fully himself, ever vigilant, ever cautious.

I do hope one day he realises many of the eyes that regard him are much kinder on him than he thinks, at least here, in this afterworld.

I would ask you one thing, my friend. Do not actively bring this letter to anyone's attention, especially not the ones mentioned here. If they find out, they find out - I have nothing to truly hide, but still... these are just my incomplete, flawed, biased impressions. None of them are set in stone and the less words I can be held to, the better.

Take care,

Lydia

[joachimnapoleon]

Hello there! In the last few weeks your page turned into one of my favourite places on the internet through your knowledge and your posts about Murat and all around about the napoleonic era. I do wonder: Do you know about Murat‘s relationship with the other marshals? I am aware about your really nice post about Murat‘s relationship with Lannes but what about the others? I believe to have read that Murat disliked Davout. At the other hand he seemed to have a positive relationship with Bernadotte and Ney? I could be wrong though. I hope I do not annoy with that question and wish you a beautiful day. c:

Hello! Glad you’ve been enjoying my page, always nice to see more fans of Murat/the Napoleonic era in general popping up here. ^_^

Regarding Murat’s relationships with his fellow marshals, this is one of those subjects in which the amount of information is frustratingly sparse, so most of my views are just from piecing together what fragments I’ve come across here and there. And my guesswork may very well be wrong; my knowledge about the marshals is nowhere near complete. 

Murat & Bernadotte: It’s generally been accepted that they were friends, at least early in their careers, because of their shared revolutionary sympathies and backgrounds. So I was a bit surprised to come across a letter from Murat to Joseph Bonaparte, which I included in my book, in which Murat says he’d resign if Bernadotte were ever given preference over him for a military command, after Bernadotte sided against the Bonapartes on 18 Brumaire. That being said, Murat had invited Bernadotte to his wedding ten months prior to writing that letter (though I’ve always wondered if this was just to nettle Napoleon for having opposed his marriage to Caroline). I really haven’t come across what their relationship was like in later years, but it would be interesting to look into.

Murat & Bessières: These two went off together, as young men from the Lot, to join the Constitutional Guard in 1792. He also attended Murat’s wedding in January 1800. Beyond that, I’ve found depressingly little on their personal relationship. Bessières apparently did become quite close with Eugène de Beauharnais, which does make me wonder if his relationship with Murat might’ve soured at some point, since poor paranoid Murat tended to be one of those “the friend of my enemy is also my enemy” types. Nevertheless, he and Caroline both wrote letters to Bessières’ widow after his death in 1813; sadly I’ve never been able to read them, since they’re in the French Archives. 

Murat & Ney: At least during the 1805 campaign, these two didn’t get along very well. Shortly after Murat’s victory at Wertingen, Napoleon placed the entire right wing of the army (which included the corps of Lannes and Ney) under Murat’s orders, which neither Lannes or Ney were happy about. At one point Ney argued with Murat over his dispositions and whipped out a map to show Murat why he was wrong, to which Murat said “I understand nothing of your plans; it is my way to make mine in the presence of the enemy!” The remark stung Ney enough that he threw it back at Murat prior to the attack at Elchingen, in front of Napoleon, turning to Murat and shouting, “Come, Prince, come with me, and make your plans in the presence of the enemy!” But a lot of the campaign-tension stuff shouldn’t be read too deeply into when it comes to analyzing friendships; Murat and Lannes butted heads on campaign too. War is stressful, and generals/marshals wanted to show each other up and win the most prestige. Ney still took the waters at Barèges with Lannes and Murat in July of 1808, so Lannes and Ney were two of the first people with whom Murat got to share the wonderful news that he was officially a king now. I don’t think Murat and Ney ever became particularly close friends, but they at least seemed to get along, and work together, better during the 1812 campaign. 

Murat & Soult: Apparently disliked each other, but I haven’t found much mentioning them in relation to each other either way. @josefavomjaaga has posted some excerpts from the memoirs of one of Soult’s aides which mention Soult’s displeasure with Murat though.

Murat & Davout: Their mutual dislike really seems to have crystalized during the 1812 campaign, in which they quarreled repeatedly (at one point Murat wanted to fight him, and Belliard held him back as he was about to head for Davout’s tent with a pistol), culminating with Davout accusing Murat of “black ingratitude” towards Napoleon when Murat was ranting about him at one point. I think they were just an oil-and-water pair, totally incompatible with each other personality-wise, and I also think it grated on Davout (and probably many of the other marshals) that Murat had been made a king by Napoleon by virtue of being an imperial brother-in-law, and that they officially had to refer to him as Your Majesty from then on.  

Murat & Berthier: This is an interesting one, and I wish I had more information. Early on, Murat disliked Berthier and seemed to think Berthier had it out for him (and maybe he did, since Murat admitted to having spoken against him; but, again, Murat was kind of a paranoid wreck and thought virtually everybody had it out for him). Between this and the fact that his relationship with Napoleon was on an early down-turn, Murat actually wrote to Barras at the beginning of the Egyptian campaign (I believe from Malta) and asked to be reassigned. At some point though, his relationship with Berthier improved. There are some interesting letters from Berthier to Murat in Murat’s published correspondence which speak to them having a closer relationship. In one, I can’t remember the year off the top of my head but I want to say sometime between 1806-7, Berthier says that he misses the lunches they used to share together. In another from around that time or perhaps 1808, Berthier laments that Murat has been nonresponsive to his previous letters and is clearly wounded by it. In the summer of 1808, Berthier writes Murat another touching letter as Murat is about to become a king, and Berthier regrets that soon he will not be able to write to him with the same effusion. Throughout Murat’s reign, Napoleon would typically leave it to Berthier to kind of “soften the blow,” so to speak, when it came to giving Murat lectures on how he should behave as a king, and to try to soothe his hurt feelings after Napoleon’s typically insensitive reprimands. They both endured Napoleon’s stormy moods during the 1812 campaign and had to figure out how to pick up the pieces together once Napoleon abandoned the army. Berthier initially supported the choice of Murat, due to his rank, to take command rather than Eugène, but soon realized Murat wasn’t capable of handling it, and wrote a ciphered letter to Napoleon saying that he needed to be replaced immediately. I don’t think it was personal; Murat was just terrible under pressure, and wasn’t the right man for that particular job. Anyway, I think anyone would be hard pressed to find two guys who put up with more of Napoleon’s shit over the years than Berthier and Murat, and after 17 or so years of working so closely together and going through so much shared hardship, I can’t help but think they had bonded at least a bit. 

Those are the main ones; as far as the other marshals, I haven’t come across enough info on Murat’s relationships with them to have anything to say. If anybody has any more information to add on anything, feel free. :)

Thanks for the ask!

[josefavomjaaga]

Eugène writes to Bessières about being a prince

This letter I had already known about, as it was in large parts published by Frédéric Masson in one of his volumes on Napoleon's family.

For context: In early February Eugène had - apparently rather abruptly - been ordered to lead a contingent of troops (he speaks of chasseurs, mameluks and artillery) to Milan. Madame Rémusat links this to Napoleon's affair with Madame Duchatel, with whom, according to her, Eugène was first in love. Napoleon had, so to speak, snatched the girl away from his stepson. However, Murat and Caroline also seem to have been involved in this affair that led to violent fits of jealousy on Josephine's part.

I had always considered this a rather dubious anecdote but Eugène does admit in his very first letter to Bessières that he is worried about his mother's peace of mind, Hortense does mention Madame Duchatel in a letter to Eugène as well (though without any reference to Eugène being interested in her), and there's the strange allusion in Murat's letters to Eugène that "a beautiful lady never needs a recommendation" in Eugène's case. Which may or may not refer to this incident.

Whatever the case, at some point during the journey, Eugène received the news that he had been elevated to the rank of prince, in very flattering terms, and as soon as he reached Lyon and got out of the ugly winter weather, he wrote to Bessières about it.

Lyon, this 19 Pluviose [an XIII; 8 February 1805]

You know of my new dignity, my dear Bessières, you know above all the message to the Senate, you also know me well and you can easily judge all that I feel. It is impossible to describe.

I will admit to you that, knowing the Emperor's good intentions concerning me, I dared to expect something; but nothing so beautiful, nothing so flattering for me. I swear to you that I am confused.

Which is actually not a good translation as French "confus" apparently can take on several meanings at once: overwhelmed, stunned, even embarrassed.

I have written, as you can imagine, to the Emperor, the Empress, my sister, in fact to several people who have written me letters of congratulations. As for you, I hope you won't write me anything of this sort. That would be offending me, that would be thinking that I could question your friendship. You know that I count on it and that I attach the greatest importance to it.

Mine, my dear Bessières, is beyond all trial.

I embrace you with all my heart and, as I pay my respectful homage to Mme Bessières, I beg you to kindly ask her to always regard me as a friend of the house.

Le Pr. Eugène

I eagerly await your orders to cross Mont Cenis.

The postscript is a bit funny because in the letter before this one, Eugène had already described to Bessières in detail what he wanted these orders to look like.

Also, Eugène signing "Le Prince Eugène" - Napoleon had written him a letter explicitly telling him that from now on he had to do that. 😁

Bessières, as to him, must have written to Eugène about the newly acquired rank as well, because in his next letter from 29 Pluviose Eugène writes:

[...] I will not talk to you, my dear Bessières, about the letter you wrote to me. You must have received one from me in which I predicted all that your good friendship could inspire in you. Mine can be neither increased nor diminished. [...]

[rosie-of-beauharnais]

To my dear Madame l'Impératrice;

I'm writing to let you know how happy I am to hear you've joined us here in this "hellsite" as it's commonly called. I've had a long time to reflect on my actions in life, and I treated you abominably. I am deeply sorry for what has passed between us, and I hope that will not color our actions now. Caroline and I owe you so much, and I wish that, perhaps, it could have been different.

With the highest regards, your brother-in-law,

@your-dandy-king a.k.a. "Roi d'Italie" Roi de Naples

P.S. I'm a bit busy, so it may take me a little time to reply, being neither quite here nor there. It's a long story.

<<Murat does not know how to feel about his sister-in-law's boobs>>

mon apprécie roi de naples:

it is also my delight to see you after everything that has happened between you, your wife and me. i receive your apology and i accept it. let´s us no longer carry this burden from the past. do not feel the need to say more of this topic, because from this instant we can treat each other like family. i send you the best wishes for you and caroline, may you be together for the rest of this after life.