#this is very unsettling
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OK, THAT'S COLD AS FUCK
#teenagers scare the living shit out of me#THIS IS VERY UNSETTLING#RIP RANDO#BSD#DAZAI OSAMU#15 DAZAI#dazai chuuya age fifteen#dazai chuuya 15#bungo stray dogs#bsd manga#ARTHUR RIMBAUD
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Um, ok, this is a problem. This is disgusting and very uncomfortable. You don't know what drama it was! And for the record, I'm paranoid thanks to that guy! I have a girlfriend I should point out.😐
I don't know who this person is, but this is not cool. You're shipping real people! This is disgusting. Could you report this person please: https://www.tumblr.com/kegaliu
I just can't get a break, can I?😔
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This is upsetting in a way that's hard to articulate-- like it isn't really the uncanny valley, but also it is? But in reverse? But the last sentence in that commentary was like a flap to the face.
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purity culture ruins people’s ability to engage with works that deal with serious issues and it’s disheartening to see people entirely miss the point of a work because they are guided by a knee jerk reaction towards disgust and I need to ramble
so, I’m reading a book called Jawbone by Monica Ojeda and it’s a very interesting horror novel that centers around puberty and teen girls and their relationships to their mothers. One of the bigger themes in the book is the idea of shame revolving around sexual development. One of the main characters is a young lesbian who is developing feelings for her best friend and has a mother who is incredibly homophobic and disapproving and in part of the book there’s a scene where this character talks about her mother catching her masturbating and the way that she is disgusted by her daughter and kind of this horror around being viewed as having lost your innocence from experiencing something that is common and should be mundane. sexual development is seen as a horrific and sinful action and that causes this character trauma through the rest of the book surrounding the way that her mother looks at her and how her mother is going to react when she finds out that she’s gay it’s a book that deals with a lot of topics around sexual shame. For example, another character is so terrified of the sin of masturbation that she keeps herself from masturbating by imagining being raped by men in her family who she cares about because it disgusts her and keeps her from achieving sexual arousal. the book itself shows that the action of the character masturbating when she’s six years old is an innocent action. It’s one that comes from curiousity and just what happens when you have a body. The book is very clear that the act is being sexualized by the adults around her and their reactions feel violating.
So it is infuriating to then go from reading this book to trying to read reviews of this book and finding that the first review on Goodreads is a one star review that just says “in this book a six-year-old masturbates 🤮” participating in the same disgust with the natural sexual development of young girls that the book itself tries to depict as a horrifying and violating way to view children and puberty
#purity culture#it’s a very unsettling horror novel#and I haven’t finished it yet but it’s very good so far
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As much as nearly every character she meets tends to act like there's something uniquely broken and wrong with Claudia, at no point does it truly seem to me like there actually really is? I mean, obviously she is extremely fucked up, she straight up went through a serial killer collecting trophies phase, but there's a level of fucked up that's sort of the baseline for every character in the show, and obviously being turned into a vampire as a child puts her at a unique disadvantage. But for all that everyone around her spends their time bemoaning how dreadful and doomed her life is, even Louis who genuinely loves her but also builds so much of his identity around feeling responsible for her Terrible Fate™, I really don't think she's like, fundamentally damaged any more than any of the other vampires are.
But Lestat is so unwilling to be wrong that every time her life hits an inevitable road bump instead of helping her through it he points and says "look! see! she IS a monster, I was right Louis, making her was a mistake!" (and I think he sees his own monstrousness in her but fails to also see her humanity)
And then Armand meets her and sees only someone who will inevitably lose her mind, so of course speeding up the "inevitable" and siding with the coven to plan her death is just a mercy, absolving himself of any blame. (and he projects his own frailty and desire for death onto her, failing to see her strength and her desire for life)
Which makes it so cathartic when she meets Madeleine, admits to her how broken she feels sometimes, and Madeleine's response is just. Well that's normal. Who isn't a little broken these days. Let yourself feel it, move on, let yourself feel it again if you need to. After spending her life having others act as if her emotions are something uniquely dark and worrying, Madeleine's incredibly blase attitude must have been such an incredible breath of fresh air for Claudia!
To spend her whole life being made to feel like something is Wrong™ with her, and then meet someone who's just like, "yeah, and?? Who isn't? Join the club I guess"
Which makes her death so incredibly tragic and frustrating because like. She was fine! She was making a life for herself! She wasn't doomed by her nature, she wasn't "doomed by the narrative" (whatever the fuck that even means), she was doomed for no reason other than that everyone around her (except for Madeleine) preemptively DECIDED she was doomed and never gave her a chance to prove them wrong.
#interview with the vampire#claudia iwtv#claudia de pointe du lac#claudia eparvier#(just using all the possible last names for the sake of thorough tagging lol)#there's also a very interesting layer of like#disability metaphor in claudias story#with her just living her life as best she can#despite a physical disadvantage#that makes the world perceive her as both childlike and unsettling#and others see this as a terrible fate worse than death#meanwhile she's just#living her life#she could have lived a full and good life (by vampire standards) if others hadn't decided that she couldn't/shouldn't
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Empyrean!
Empyrean Weeping’s Leo was the first thing to cross my mind when I saw this prompt so of course I had to draw him (^^ゞ I just think the way empyrean is used in this au is really really (two reallys) cool :)
Empyrean Weeping belongs to @cupcakeslushie and the original Rise August prompt list was made by @sariphantom :)
#rottmnt#rise of the tmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise august art challenge#rise august 2024#rise august#rottmnt leo#rise leo#rottmnt leonardo#rise leonardo#hamato leonardo#leonardo hamato#save rottmnt#save rise of the tmnt#save rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#unpause rottmnt#unpause rise of the tmnt#unpause rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#artists on tumblr#my art#art#illustration#doodles#mint draws#eye strain#yes i do know its september :p#empyrean in EW is super interesting#there's something so unsettling about the way it can twist people and crack even the strongest of wills#very cool :)#using these sort of neon color palettes is always so much fun
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4 MINUTES (2024) I 1.03
#4 minutes#4 minutes the series#bible wichapas#uservix#userfaiza#userrlaura#userrlana#thai bl#bl series#*me being completely insane* there's a clue in the PLUSHIES!!! the fact that these are cats makes it kinda unsettling too#i mean remember when tonkla saw that black cat come out of nowhere.... hmmmmm#also bible smoking in the rain can be something very personal#plus the glass seperating us from him! YEAH#love that when the clock switched he immediately was shocked into action - great is starting to understand that he needs to HURRY#smoking tw#mywork
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old sketch i found, i really should do something with this concept i think it could be fun
#iterator that is so unsettling and very obviously never got used to the puppet#the horror of being dependent on something inhuman that is very obviously trying and failing to act like you etc etc#my art
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another attack! this one for crabsbeverage.
#my art#art fight#artfight#artfight 2024#anthro#furry#i loooove this artist their stuff is really so unique and makes me kinda queasy and unsettled to look at sometimes#very unreal and oddly atmospheric#anyway i'm once again humbled by the attacks i've gotten - really so grateful. i could get emotional#i wish i could revenge everyone i wish i had all the time in the world to draw ocs. my one calling in life#i'm having a little break right now. gonna play some animal crossing and maybe do some more attacks an hour or so before bed
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New road sign just dropped (courtesy of my unconscious mind)
this is a road sign that i would extend my commute to drive by
#very jenny holzeresque i like it#i appreciate that you could interpret it from multiple angles as well. it could be an interrogation of hypervigilance.#or a call to pay attention to your surroundings and take better care of yourself.#or a reminder that you bear a shared responsibility to build a safer community.#or just a mildly unsettling road sign!
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i love that star trek has so many autistic characters that theyve got the whole fucking spectrum in there .on a scale from worf, odo, spock, data, julian, deanna and wesley to picard what type of 'tism do YOU have ?
#edit: all the tags on this post of people picking their own personal tism brand make me very happy actually .i love star trek#its like star signs but Worse#anyway im like .a horrible mixture of data picard and wesley#the ultimate Strange and Unsettling Nerd Child basically#ticketts thoughts#star trek#star trek ds9#tng#star trek tng#star trek the next generation#star trek deep space nine#oh god .do i have to tag all those characters .no fml its 11 pm as i draft this im not doing that
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I rewatched Zuko and Azula's Agni Kai recently and it's left me wondering – when Zuko begins to goad Azula into striking him with lightning, was he making the decision to kill her?
Because had Azula shot lightning directly at him like he planned and not at Katara, the most forthright implication to me is that he was intending to strike Azula with her own lightning. And Azula, for all her mastery, would not have been able to counter that.
On the other hand, maybe he wasn't planning to kill her at all and was simply planning to redirect it elsewhere (similar to what he did with Ozai). But given the tone of tragedy throughout the Agni Kai, the fact that they both acknowledge that this fight will be "the end" to them, I don't think it's inaccurate to read Zuko's actions as him preparing to kill Azula, even though an Agni Kai doesn't have to end with death (and in canon it didn't). Also, why goad her into striking him with lightning if he wasn't planning on doing something intentional with it? If anything, it adds another layer to the tragedy to me, because I don't believe Zuko wants to kill her. And it stands in such contrast to the way that Azula desperately wants to kill him.
I also think that there would have even been something sadly poetic in that sort of demise for Azula should the Agni Kai had gone this direction: Azula, struck down by her preferred sub-skill. Azula, struck down by the very bolt of lightning that she intended to kill her brother with. Azula, struck down by her own power.
#I'm just so curious to Zuko's state of mind during this Agni Kai#maybe I'm slow on the uptake and everyone's gonna be like: obviously he was trying to kill her#but it just... never occurred to me#Like I knew he brought up lightning redirection as an intentional goad?#but I never really thought about what his planned outcome was given how the fight ends up panning out#Also Zuko's perspective when it comes to killing is interesting to me#because morally he's not against it!!#He thinks Ozai should die#And tells Ozai that the reason that he's not going to kill him (during the eclipse) is because of optics/politics (its the avatar's duty)#he thinks that had Katara killed her mother's killer it would have been a form of justice#(or maybe he was just referring to the act of her confronting him idk that whole convo is very ambiguous at times lol)#and yet AND YET he still reached out to save Zhao in season 1 despite Zhao having tried to kill him#he seems shocked (unsettled?) by the idea that Azula might die when she's falling from the airship and that's what?#days? a few weeks before the Agni Kai?#(and sure that reaction could just be shock that she would die so... randomly? but still)#Its just so fascinating#and so tragic#atla#zuko
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I can't get over that last scene from this episode. that long pause where sam was quietly grabbing a drink and you could barely hear celia talking to jack as she put him to bed in the other room. nothing was happening in that moment that needed to be recorded. no terrible events no big revelations. just sam and celia quietly going about their lives, sharing a domestic moment.
as something watched and listened. and we don't know why it's listening.
#ramblings with major#the magnus protocol#tmagp#tmagp spoilers#its like. its so unsettling because a) that faint ambient music did its job Very Well#but also b) we didnt have that in tma!! anything soft and domestic was left to the imagination!!#we got a couple establishing bits from scotland and then The Mass Ritual statement was recorded for obvious reasons#upton house also had very little on tape after the statement was done#i dont think there was ever that kind of quiet slow 'fluff' scene like that in tma#and there was always some reason things were being recorded. usually someone was aware of a tape being on#now theres just colin being colin and everyone else is only vaguely aware that their Computers are listening#no one knows about the phones not really. or the personal laptops. or the nanny cams.#and this is just. so much more unsettling. i love it sm it feels So invasive and awful ough
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sorry for not posting here more lately i was working on a video about fern sex and then i moved to working on a video about ranking plants by hubris and whimsy and then i moved to learning calculus so i could understand cursed biology and then i built a tiny pin loom to learn how to weave with yarn so i could make a little stuffed creature with it and then i moved to learning how to hack a little circuit board but to do that i need to learn how to solder you know how it is
#BUT. i am still optimistic about the first two videos mentioned tbf.#not plonts#do i like the part of myself that makes it very very very hard to finish projects i start? nah. but i am trying to like it more#like im having a good time. i feel unsettled but this is how ive always been lmao
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bait / hook / line / sinker
#the hunger games#finnick odair#thg#the hunger games fanart#this was a very very weird painting for me.#like i have painted decapitated heads and severed arms and shattered ribs and guts falling out and gallons of blood#and not once have i ever looked up from my work and been disgusted or disturbed by what i’ve painted#but the first day i was working on this one i looked at it and just felt so sick i had to get up and take a shower to get away from it#HE WAS 14 WTF WTF WTF WTF#that is a baby. that is a little kid. turned into a killer and paraded around like a novelty and used like a toy.#but on the whole i am very satisfied with this propaganda piece it's just as beautiful and unsettling as i wanted it to be#ugh my mind. nothing in the composition is overt but all the implications are there#not just the capitol's sexualization and brutalization of children but the fetishization of the districts' labor as well#as my good friend and mutual theworldiswhispering said.#'the hard labor you do is not safe from being romanticized by the people who benefit from it at your expense'#and i think about that every day#wherefore art thou#thg reread#why he so smooth.. just like a shark#[katniss voice] mfs took all my body hair cant have shit in the capitol#i just know tumblr's gonna crunch the quality of these images but i worked on a canvas 4 times larger than the usual size#so a lot of the detail gets lost when i post it. oh well. click for quality i guess#his expression changes when you're far away#far away he looks kind of vacant#close up he's smiling. like the photographer wanted a specific cocky emotion from him and it was there#but when you zoom out there's just a thousand yard stare#i did think about turning these into prints or actual posters but um. i don't think i should do that
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Reluctant War AU Part 4
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3
Everything I know about Flash and the FlashFam (& Flash enemies) comes from fandom and theflashmuseum on tiktok so fair warning on that lol
Sorry if Barry is out of character or things don't line up with canon. Canon is a stranger I think I passed in a crowded room once, I did not ask for its number lol
Anyway, time to touch a bit more on that whole Ancient of the Speedforce Elle thing yeah? Here be a sprinkle more of that and I promise there's more to come haha
Gonna start posting this on Ao3 soon, probably Monday or Tuesday, so heads up I may stop adding these parts here on tumblr once I do
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It lived beneath his skin.
For a long time Barry had never believed in magic. His world was grounded, scientific, made of predictable rules and laws. Tools that could be used to explain everything strange or supernatural away as just another odd twist of the massive universe they all belonged to.
It took perhaps a little longer than it should have to admit that magic was as real as thermodynamics and gravity and atoms. That the world was a great deal stranger than even science - for all its own wildness at times - could account for. There were things that went bump in the night. Hells below and heavens above and things that crawled and clawed their way out from the places in between.
It was almost a little embarrassing how long it had taken him to admit to such things, when considering his relationship with the Speedforce.
A force of the universe. Like gravity or time, pushing and pulling everything along. Something that could be explained with all the familiar scientific concepts that had buoyed him along in life for so long.
Except.
Except.
Buzzing, burning, blistering. Not painful but felt. Making his hair stand on end, his fingers tingle and numb. Sliding against his veins, bouncing between scar tissue and freckles. Pressing out from the confines of his sternum, rattling against his rib cage as it shifted and moved. Twining around each and every vertebrae. Coiling over and under itself within his skull, darting along the paths of his neurons and nerves. It hummed in every cell in his body. Darted and danced in the space between the atoms that made up his very existence.
The Speedforce lived beneath his skin.
Lived.
Not existed. Not contained. Lived.
He couched it in terms of science, but science - despite his long time refusal to acknowledge it - wasn’t really able to explain the full scope of what he could feel. Not just the power of the Speedforce, but the…the identity of it. The living part that made it’s home in his body, existing in a way that was separate from him. Distant and indistinct most of the time, but…sentient.
He could feel it. Warm and excitable, delighting every time he tapped into it. Pushing him from behind urging him on and on, tugging him forward from ahead beckoning to go, faster, faster. Joyful in his victories, despairing in his loses.
It lived beneath his skin.
Until it didn’t.
He followed its joyful calls, pushed beyond what he should, what he knew was safe. Chasing that welcoming chant of faster, faster until he was there. In the Speedforce. More even, was the Speedforce.
He was everywhere. Beyond everywhere. In every possible everywhere it was possible to be. Every world, every universe, every multiverse.
To enter the Speedforce, to merge with it, was to become part of existence itself.
He couldn’t remember everything about it once he came back. He got flashes, sometimes, quick moments in dreams of places, of moments. What stuck with him most had been the feeling of it all. That had been the hardest part of returning. The sense of terrible loss, of having been surrounded by such a giddy, delighted, devoted love only to be pulled back from the heart of it. Returned to how he had been before, drifting at the edge of it all, it had been painful, agonizing even.
He…adapted, eventually. The sense of it all was still there, just distant. Something he’d come to feel he’d see again, someday.
It had been different, recently.
His powers were the same, he just as fast as ever, but…there was something…off. Changed. A sense that while his speed remained, the Speedforce had become, for lack of a better word, quiet. Distant.
He’d been having dreams, since it started. Not the quick glimpses of his time where he’d merged with the Speedforce. No, instead they were more nightmarish. Not nightmares exactly, though he felt like they should be with what they contained, but something else. Something that felt unnervingly real, left him confused and reeling when he woke with the certainty that when he opened his eyes he’d see the same as what his dreams held.
In the dream, he was in a room.
Cement and metal, hostile and brutalistic in design. He was bound in place, standing upright with feet and hands spread wide and locked in place within strange devices. Gleaming chrome and brilliant green, a painful thrum of energy surging through his body - not the Speedforce, something else, deeply unpleasant pulsing through every cell of his being and freezing him in place more firmly then the restraints did. Projectors hung from the ceiling, displaying images of landscapes, changing every ten second or so.
The sight of them made him nauseous, body shivering and spasming with the burning, agonizing need to go, but at the same time there was something distantly soothed by them too. Like a gnawing hunger abated with water and crumbs. The need for food not gone but the pangs diminished by the false feeling of being full.
In the dream he felt like he was dying.
In the dream he was afraid that maybe he couldn’t.
That he’d be trapped alive in that state forever, watching places he’d never see in person again as he was trapped in one place. His mind spiraling his Core splintering under the weight of it all, scared so scared. He wanted his brother, wanted to see the cement walls explode into dust and debris and see him there, ready to save the day like he had so many times before.
He just had to wait. His brother was looking for him, would have everyone in the Realms looking for him. He just had to hold on.
Barry didn’t have a brother. He only remembered when he woke, heart hammering in his chest fast even by his own standards, mouth tasting of bile and body aching with the need to go.
He hadn’t been sleeping much these days, even before the King of the Dead declared war.
It was having its effects, as sleep deprivation always did. His mind drifting, catching again and again on the dream, attention far away from the world around him. How many times had he been startled by someone calling his name, touching his arm? How many times had they given him a pinched, worried look that told him they’d been trying to reach him for longer than they should have before he noticed.
He was aware, distantly, of the glowering, stern faces around him. The flinty looks of his friends’ and partners’ eyes as they stared at the image of Waller’s scowling mug.
She’d declined an in-person meeting, hunkering down in some bunker somewhere trying to avoid the consequences of her latest atrocities. Or maybe just trying to avoid the very real possibility that one of the members of JL Dark might try to kill her for what she’s caused.
Or JL light, for that matter.
Bruce and Clark had their rules that they lived by, but Diana certainly wouldn’t hesitate to splatter Waller’s brains across the nearest available wall. In reviewing footage of one of the last battles - she’d been at the other one at the time, trying to contend with a ghost in the shape of an ethereal dragon - she’d recognized the spectral figures of Amazons long dead, fierce even in death as they fought with a warrior’s pride along side the rest of Phantom’s armies. They followed a figure that towered even above the Amazons, four arms and gleaming armor and a name that Barry associated with ruin and forgotten hope but who was so much more to Diana. Heroes long departed to the fields of Elysium, stepping out of their well earned rest to fight once more.
A few hadn’t survived the weapons the GIW shot them with. Barry didn’t know what that meant, for a ghost to die. If they simply returned to their afterlife or -
He tried not to think about the or.
They’d been going back and forth for awhile now. Voices faraway, muffled. The world felt as if it was underwater, blurred and cold. Clark had gotten to his feet at some point, Waller’s grip on a pen so tight on the screen he expected to see if burst at any moment. It was an important meeting, an important discussion. One he needed to be apart of, aware of, but it all escaped him. Sand held too tightly, slipping through his fingers. On the screen, Waller hit a button on the computer beside her and the image changed.
The world burned back to life in sharp relief.
The dream.
The room.
Cold cement. Projections of unreachable places on the walls. Chrome and green machinery in a configuration meant to contain.
It looked larger on the screen.
Maybe it was how small the figure held prisoner inside it was.
She was young. A child, no older than Superboy Jr. or Robin. She looked like Phantom - her father - but there were differences. Her hair was white, but it didn’t look like the spun starlight of her father’s. Instead it burned, the bright hot crackling of the plasma of a lighting bolt striking. Skin the blur of shapes caught just at the corner of the eye as you ran past, Eyes -
Looking at him.
The image had come up, a live feed - he knew it was live, knew he was looking at her where she was at that exact moment - and she’d been as he was every time he tried to sleep. Trembling and shuttering, eyes squinting against the pain, trying to stay open so as not to miss a single moment of the flat images imposed on blank cement walls. Desperate to fill the fathomless hunger burning deep down in the Core of her.
But then a shuttering breath and her eyes - the burning green of an afterimage - snapped up to the camera. Snapped up to look at him, recognition in her young face. And despite never having seen this girl before, he recognized her too.
The Speedforce lived beneath his skin.
She lived beneath his skin.
He could feel her there. Buzzing, burning, blistering. Not painful, but felt.
Not as felt as she used to be.
The image snapped back to Waller’s face, smug and self-satisfied. Talking - lying - about the how the girl was there, what the GIW’s intentions for her were. Barry was on his feet, but so was everyone else. He couldn’t hear what they were saying, could only hear static, the rush of wind, the crack of the lightning bolt. A call for help.
It was then that the alarms began to blare. On the screen someone rushed in to whisper into Waller’s ear. Bruce was running out of the room towards the Zeta tubes and Barry was right there with him and there was so much chaos around them, men in white and Gothamites and Ghosts banding together to rain terror down upon them and something massive and horrible and living towering above it all and Barry let go of that last bits of logic and thought.
Instinct, older than he was. The echo of a voice that had called him for years now, carrying him along, biding him forward:
Run.
Someone might have shouted after him as he left Gotham behind. He didn’t know.
All he knew was the pounding of his feet upon the ground, the wind in his face, the Speedforce lashing and frantic and hopeful burning and sizzling beneath his skin. Calling him further and further away until he stood in a vast, empty field staring at a single, rusted shack near ready to collapse before him.
He wasn’t alone.
Wally. Bart. Max. More still. Not just his family and friends. Eobard. Hunter. Thaddeus. Everyone touched by the Speedforce.
They didn’t speak. Bodies humming and thrumming, crackling with energy and intent.
Minds as one, they focused on the shed, the hidden hatch inside, the base hidden deep below.
The Speedforce lived beneath their skin, and no one was going to steal it away from them.
#dpxdc#dc x dp#dp x dc#barry allen#justice league#flashfam#dani phantom#danielle phantom#elle phantom#ancient of the speedforce elle#ever onward elle#amanda waller#eldritch speedforce#kinda#unsettling speedforce at the very least#cut to 20 minutes later to all of the speedsters & Elle at a waffle house having the world's most awkward family reunion#Dick gets a call from his bank about his card being used to buy several thousand dollars worth of breakfast food in another state#& immediate calls Wally like#Dick: YOU TOOK OFF IN THE MIDDLE OF A FULL ON WAR IN GOTHAM TO GO GET WAFFLES?#(because of course he gave Wally his card - he's bought Wally a god damn expensive ass apartment they're basically married)#Dick: I THOUGHT YOU WERE BEING MIND CONTROLLED#Wally: ....sorta? But like...in a good way?#Dick: How can there POSSIBLY be a good way of being mind controlled?!#Wally: you know what actually I'm gonna make our new mom explain this one#Dick: ...WHAT DOES THAT *MEAN*???
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