#this is the FUNNIEST thing in the world to me

[formylovetodaryldixon]

"Catching the fox." Daryl Dixon Imagine.

(Not my gif!)

Jesus only caused problems since you, Daryl and Rick met him during a run, but that doesn’t prevent you all from having a little fun. (Even if you come home empty-handed)

A/N: Based on what is probably the funniest episode of "The Walking Dead" to me. I wrote this a while ago but I'm posting it for my friend, who actually finds this funny hehe Sorry if this is long and boring :c Spoiler alert: Jealous Daryl is my favorite Daryl! I hope you like it!

“So… hunky-dunky. Uh?”

In front of you all, an empty, silent road is always pleasant. Nature wasn’t lost after the apocalypse, not completely, and although the green color of the grass disappeared slowly with the passage of time, Mother Nature still retained her place in the world. Sitting by the window in that big truck full of food, the wind pushes some strands of your hair as you breathe in the fresh air. And, sitting in the middle as Rick drives, Daryl glances at you as he checks Denise’s list.

“Don’t…” He says, warning you, making you chuckle. It was the word that Eugene used when he gave Daryl his map, always using fancy ones. At his side as he drives the truck down the hill, Rick chuckles, too. “Why ya never gave me a list?”

You watch the list in his hand and then, you look back at him.

“I think it's impossible to get a high definition TV with surround sound system so I can watch the games again like in those old days. You know, the ones that were on TV before the world went to hell.”

Both men look at you with a funny look, and you look back at the window as the truck approaches that abandoned gas station on the left side of the road. There are papers and trash everywhere, and Rick parks near the gasoline pumps. All of you get out, but since the silent street is free of any walker, you walk around while Rick goes ahead to check the store door.

“We had that shit in our apartment? That round sound thing.”

You chuckle before turning around towards him, smiling innocently.

“Surround sound system, love, and no, we didn’t. We were always fooling around so we never really had time to watch the games. Remember?”

Your words catch him off guard, and his innocent eyes look at you until he understands what they mean. A second later, the boldness shines in his blue eyes and he closes the distance of a few steps between you two. Daryl encircles your waist with his right arm and pulls you gently towards him, his forehead resting against yours.

“Are ya makin’ fun of me, sunshine?”

You shake your head, softly.

“No, but why?” You whisper. “Does that turn you on?”

“Really?” Rick complains, suddenly, closer than you thought he was. “Now?”

You chuckle pulling away from your husband.

“Sorry, bro.” Says Daryl, taking his arm off of you.

Rick looks at you two with a sarcastic expression and raises an eyebrow.

“I regret coming with you two.”

But he is joking and let it go quickly.

On the back of the place, Daryl walks over to the black machine lying in the middle, noticing it was a vending machine turning upside down. Although Denise said it wasn’t of the utmost importance, he wants to go back to Alexandria with a gift for Tara, just because Daryl understood the feeling of trying to do something nice for another person. So, minutes later, Rick rolls over the machine with a chain attached to the truck, and as he gets out and walks towards you two, the glass shows that the interior is full.

“It’s soda and Candy.” Rick says while Daryl removes one of the chains. “Why the trouble?”

“It ain’t a trouble.”

But suddenly, out of nowhere, a man turns around the corner and pushes Rick on his way out, raising his hands in the air as Daryl and Rick take their guns to aim at the stranger, your own hand holding your weapon hidden behind your waist, as a reflex in the face of danger.

The bandana that covers half of his face shows only his pretty eyes.

“Hi.” He is agitated, as if he has run for a long time. “I was just running from the dead.”

“How many?” Daryl asks while Rick steps back to look at the corner of the lonely place, searching for any walkers close by.

“10. Maybe more. I’m not risking it. Once it gets to double digits, I start running.”

Daryl doesn’t trust him, and he keeps pointing at him with his gun.

“Where?”

“About a half a mile back. They’re headed this way. You probably have about…” He wiggles his head, looking for the right number. “11 minutes.”

The distrust doesn’t go away, but Rick is the first and the only one who lowers his weapon.

“Okay, thanks for letting of know.”

“Yes.” The man breathes through his bandana. “There’s more of them than us. Right? Gotta stick together.” He looks at Daryl, due to his gun still pointing at him. “Right?”

Although that stranger appeared from nowhere, he lowers his gun, too.

“You have a camp?” The man asks.

Maintaining the safety of Alexandria was the main thing, and being selective with the new people you all let in was the first rule until you all knew they could be trusted.

“No.” Daryl says.

“Do you?” Rick asks.

The man thinks about it for a second.

“No.” He finally says, and then, he looks at you standing next to them. “It’s just you two, with a woman?”

Before you realize what he meant, Daryl raises his weapon quickly, his hand tightening around it in anger.

“Ya want me to shoot ya, asshole? She’s ma wife and yer gonna say yer sorry.”

The man breathes in and Rick looks at him.

“You better say it now before he shoots you.”

Before looking at you, the man looks at Daryl who was still aiming him with his gun, so the new one does it. You don’t think what he said was an insult, but it was better to follow the situation calmly before Daryl shoots him for real.

“I’m really sorry, madam. I didn’t mean to offend you.” You move your hand in the air to minimize the misunderstanding, telling him it was okay. “Well… sorry for running into you. I’m gonna go now.” He turns around and starts walking, talking over his shoulder. “This is the next world; I hope it’s good to you, guys.”

Daryl and you share a confused look as Rick watches the man walk away.

“I’m Rick, these are (y/n) and Daryl. What’s your name?”

The man turns around again and pulls his bandana down.

“Paul Rovia. But my friends use to call me Jesus…” He extends his arms out, casually. “You pick.”

“You said you didn’t have a camp.” Rick answers back. “You are on your own?”

“Yeah.” He looks at you all with a sudden confidence. “But still, best not to try anything.”

However, Daryl doesn’t seem impressed, or intimidated.

“Best not to make threats ya can’t keep, either.”

“Exactly.” And the man starts running out of there.

“How many walkers–” Rick tries to ask, but Daryl cut him off.

“No. Not this guy.”

However, Rick makes his question anyways.

“How many walkers have you killed?”

“Sorry! Gotta run. You should too.”

And he disappears around the corner.

Running into new people was still strange, but that situation was a new kind of strange, and hard to understand too.

“What the hell was that?” Daryl asks.

“Yeah. He was clean.” Rick nods. “His beard, it was trimmed.”

“And he was way too confident to be just by himself.” You say.

Rick nods again, because if the man is strange to you both, then that is more than just a coincidence then: something else is happening.

“He didn’t have a gun, either.” Daryl frowns, looking down the path Jesus took.

“We could track him.” Rick put away his gun. “Watch him for a while. Get to know him more. See if he’s really alone. Maybe bring him back.”

“No.” Daryl complains, his voice always low and husky. “That guy calls himself Jesus.”

But then, a noise from the front of the place attracts everyone’s attention, the thunderous sound of tires against the pavement.

“Shit.” Daryl says when he realizes the truth. “He swiped yer keys. Didn’t he?”

The moment you all get there; the place is still empty, with the truck full of food moving away up the hill.

“Sorry!” Jesus yells as he drives away, taking the vending machine with him, too.

The three of you stop in the middle of the road, watching with frustration as the truck goes away under your eyes.

“Shit.” Rick says.

The vending machine leaves a path on middle of the road, like breadcrumbs to track down the thief, until you find it halfway on the way. Daryl opens the case to secure Denise’s sodas for Tara while Rick and you catch your breaths after running up there. The strands of your hair stick to your forehead, while the beads of sweat begin to fall on theirs.

“This is a special request from the doctor.” Daryl says, showing Rick the soda can, opening one to give it to you.

“Hey…” Rick breaths and takes the broken one Daryl gives him. “Whatever she wants. She saved Carl’s life. We didn’t know her, and she turned out to be all right. And If there’s still people out here, and they’re still people, we should bring them in.”

“What? Like this guy?” Daryl points to the road Jesus left.

“No, fuck that guy.” Rick shakes his head and looks inside the machine for something.

You wipe your mouth with the back of your hand, your mind full of thoughts about what had just happened, but without saying anything, at least until you can formulate a coherent opinion.

“What’s on your mind, (y/n)?” Rick asks when he sees you looking at the ground.

“Well, I just think that…” You doubt if you should share with them what you are thinking, but it is a waste of time while the truck is still moving. “It’s nothing. We just keep going.”

You try to take a few steps but Daryl stops you reaching out his arm.

“Hey.” He says softly to you. “S’okay, jus’ say it.”

You are not naive; you know how that world works now. Not only were the alive against the dead ones. That life was a battle against other people as well. However, not everything was black and white. Or it was?

“I don’t say that what he did is right, but no one steals for pleasure these days, maybe he did it because he needs it, too.”

Rick wiggles his head slowly, half of him giving you the reason because that is true although nothing apologized what that man did.

“So what?” Daryl frowns, his temper rising again. “Would ya jus’ let him go with our stuff?”

His personality is like a roller coaster, full of constant ups and downs, but luckily, you know how to handle it.

“Don’t talk to me like that, Dixon, and it was you who said I could share my opinion. But I am not saying we should let him go just like that. Hell, no.”

Daryl gives a step back, confused by your sudden change of mood, just like his own.

“So?”

You frown back.

“The truck is ours. And, if in this world the strongest wins, that will be us. So, we will get it back.”

The force in your eyes and the way you look at him catches him completely. But Daryl is no longer shy, and although he likes your privacy as a marriage, he can’t help but tangle his hand in your hair, softly.

“Since when ya are this ballsy, woman?”

Playing, you push his hand away.

“Fuck you, Dixon. I was like this long before I met your ass.”

“I really hate you both.” Rick says, making Daryl chuckle.

“Sorry, bro. S’jus’… she looks so hot right now.”

You chuckled as Rick raises an eyebrow.

“It’s because we ran until we got here. Now, we should get going.”

At first, you try to be understanding to the request of both men asking you to wait behind the bushes while they surprise the stranger, who just finished fixing the tire of the truck parked in the middle of the road, away from the danger posed by Paul, or Jesus, or whatever he chose to call himself, but you can’t help but compare him to a fox, somewhat elusive, almost slippery as he managed to dodge the blows of Rick and Daryl, who were hit in the stomach and pushed against the truck, respectively.

So, when Jesus turns around, he stops dead with your gun pointed at his face, his hands in the air.

“You would really shoot me in the face just for a truck?”

You tilt your head, taking the safety off the gun your dad gave you for protection before dying.

“No. Not in the face, but in the legs just below the knees so you stop being so slippery.”

He takes a deep breath.

“You wouldn’t do that.”

Behind him, Rick and Daryl raise their own weapons, making you lower your own.

“Oh, trust me, pretty boy, I totally would.”

But suddenly, before you can say more, a walker comes out of the bushes, grunting at you all.

“Do you even have any ammo?” Jesus asks, but Daryl and Rick are already tired of him, and both shoot the walker at the same time. “Okay, again, are you gonna shoot me over a truck?”

“There’s a lot of foot on that truck.” Rick says. “The keys. Now.”

In the end, Jesus gives them the keys and Rick ties his his hands and feet up to leave him there, on a side of the road.

“The knots aren’t that tight.” Rick says to him. “You should be able to get free… after we’re long gone.”

For his part, Daryl growls when he sees that some of the soda cans had crushed during the fight, with all the content dripping from his backpack.

“Maybe we should talk now.” Jesus smiles when Rick walks away.

“Nah.” Daryl walks pass him by and makes you walk with him to the passenger seat. But first, he stops to shake a can and throws it at Jesus. “Here. In case ya gets thirsty.”

When you two get to the passenger seat, Daryl goes up first, and though he has to move to let you go up, too, he takes you by the waist to help you go up to sit between his legs. You are a little surprise by his action, but he just closes the truck door and chuckles as Rick moves the keys around his finger.

“You were right, (y/n).” He smiles at you as he starts the truck. “We are the strongest ones.”

As the truck begins to move, Daryl leans back against the seat and shows his middle finger out the window.

“So long, ya prick!” He yells at Jesus.

The loud music in the truck accompanies you all the way. As you lean your arm against the window frame, the wind makes your tied hair move back, in a soothing and peaceful way. Daryl’s right hand continues to rest against your waist beneath your t-shirt, holding you against him while everything around is still fine.

“He ain’t that pretty, y’know?” Daryl says quietly over the music, after a long moment of silence.

You frown, turning slightly to look at him.

"Are you kidding with me? Jesus...” But you laugh when Daryl frowns, even though you just said the name of the son of God, not that stranger. "That's not what I meant!"

But before he can answer back, Rick talks first.

“Hey, look at that.” He says, pointing something on the road in front.

A barn. When you get close, the even path changes for an unstable one as you all enter the barn’s lawn, but, out of nowhere, there is a blow that comes from the roof.

“You hear that?” You ask as Daryl lowers all the volume of the music.

“I think that son of a bitch is on the roof.”

And then, Rick is really tired of that fox.

“Hold on.” Rick steps on the brake and the truck stops abruptly, throwing Jesus through the air until he falls in front of you all.

But then, he just gets up on his feet, and runs away. It is ridiculous. It is almost comical the way Rick drives to chase him down the field, but in the end, it is Daryl who has enough of him.

“Motherfu-” Daryl stops himself to take you by the waist, and he moves from under you. “Stay here, I’ll be right back.”

Before you react or before Rick could stop the car, Daryl opens the door and gets out of the truck to chase after Jesus on foot.

Rick drives near them as you sigh.

“Sometimes I can’t believe I’m married to that man.”

Rick laughs and tries to move the truck to block Jesus, but that elusive fox is more agile, so Rick steps back the truck as Daryl and Jesus swing from side to side in the middle of the field, waiting for one of them to take the first step.

“We should clear the way for them.” Rick says when some walkers around the place start to move too close to them.

You open the truck door, moving away from it, pulling the knife from the sheath of your waist.

“We came to a conclusion, asshole!” Daryl yells at Jesus, still in the middle of the place when he runs away, so Daryl looks at you two before start chasing him, again. “I got him.”

Some walkers were tied up with around another truck, and you and Rick make them fall when they manage to break the rope free.

Back in the truck, Jesus opens the driver’s door and tries to get in, but Daryl grabs him from his jacket and tries to pull him out.

“Come ‘ere, ya little shit.”

No one sees it coming, no one pays any attention, but a walker comes up to Daryl from behind, walking dangerously until it enters Jesus’s view. He raises a gun, watching Daryl without moving.

“Duck.” He says.

Daryl understands it at once and crouches. The bullet flies over him and enters directly into the walker’s head causing it to fall. Daryl looks back and studies the body on the ground before turning back to look at Jesus.

“Thanks.” Daryl breathes out and punches him on the face. “That’s ma gun! Come ‘ere.”

The shot pierces your ears and Rick’s, causing to both of you to look at the truck in the distance, and you two run to them. Daryl tries to pull Jesus out of the truck, but Jesus knocks it into neutral, and the vehicle starts rolling into a pond behind. Daryl jumps out of the truck and Jesus followed him, but his head gets hit with the door and he passes out. When Rick and you finally reach the place, you watch Daryl moving Jesus with his boot as the truck sinks.

You sigh heavily when you all see the last of that truck before it disappears forever before everyone’s sight.

The new car you all get is old, ironically, but Rick keeps driving through the silent road in the middle of those huge trees. From the backseat, Daryl pushes Jesus who was still pretty unconscious, but his body continues to fall back on Daryl’s shoulder.

“Is he your new best friend?” You tease him, making Daryl groan. “I’m getting jealous, actually.”

“Be quiet, woman.”

“I told you I could go in the back with him.”

“Yeah?” He says. “Over ma dead body.”

Just to annoy him even more, Rick moves the car so that way Jesus’ body would fall back on Daryl. He growls again, pushing Jesus far from him as Rick drives back to Alexandria.

That same night, Daryl and Rick walk down Alexandria Street back to their homes after leaving Jesus in the basement. He was fine despite the hit, and by now they just had to wait for him to wake up in the morning.

As they arrive at Rick’s house first, it is time to say goodbye.

“It is pretty stupid of us to go out there. Isn’t?” Rick asks as he goes up the stairs of his porch.

“Yep.” Daryl says walking away. “Do it again tomorrow?”

“Yep.” Rick answers watching him go. “Tell (y/n) to come.”

“Hu-uh.” Daryl waves his hand to him.

Two houses away, Daryl goes up the steps to the porch and opens the door to his house. The only light comes from a lamp on the table in the living room, shining with an amber color. Daryl closes the door behind him and watches you come out of the kitchen.

“There’s a couple of sandwiches in case you’re hungry.”

But he just walks towards you while you stop in front of the stairs. You are tired but it had been a funny day in spite of everything, and you laugh when Daryl wraps his arms around your waist to lift you up.

You hold yourself with your hands on his shoulders, your legs around his waist.

“Nah. Jus’ want some time alone with ma wife.”

[ecargmura]

Dandadan Episode 8 Review - One Ball Down, One More To Go

There is something I would like to talk about now that I watched this episode. I think an interesting thing about Dandadan is the fact that the girls feel more like male shounen characters, but in a good way? Like, Momo feels like one of those rude shounen MCs and Aira is her rival, but they still feel like girls, but with male shounen character tropes. Okarun, on the other hand, feels like if Momo is a male shounen MC, he’d be the female love interest who’s shy but wants to get stronger so that she can be of use to her crush. Aira would be the rival character who is both similar but also different from the MC but is also involved with the female love interest whether it be romantically or not—in her case, she has a crush on Okarun. Seiko would be the MC’s mentor and Turbo Granny is the mascot character. Maybe it’s just me who thinks this way?

Why I say this is because the story really likes to make Okarun’s nutsacks be a part of a fanservice jokes like how people would always talk about a female character’s boobs. In fact, no one ever mentions boobs in this story—well, the only time they were mentioned was back in Episode 1 where Turbo Granny was asking if Okarun wanted to suckle hers. Other than that it has always been balls, whether they be golden or baseballs. The whole plot is about finding Okarun’s balls and even in this episode, the creepy aliens are after them. Like what Okarun said, WHY IS EVERYTHING AFTER HIS JUNK?

To be honest, even though Aira is revealed to be a kind person underneath her narcissism, delusion cannot be doused with character development. Even after everything that transpired in the previous episode, Aira still thinks Momo is a demon and that Okarun and Seiko are her cronies. Despite that, she develops a crush on Okarun and promises to save him from Momo’s spell. I honestly think she’s one of the funniest characters in this story because of how deluded she is. It’s so hilarious because the story really knows how to make her so funny. The way she was arguing with Momo with her mouth stuffed with noodles got me cackling. 

I also liked the part where Aira confesses to Okarun and tells him that it’s a man’s responsibility to accept the confession. Okarun is confused as heck and asked where she learned all that. It turns out that Aira learned about romance through her father’s porn stash. That got me cackling because I’m sure there are instances where girls learn about adult stuff. Heck, even I was reading very raunchy stories and looking at obscene pictures when I was a teenager, so I get her curiosity for the adult world. Though, I didn’t become deluded like Aira… The misunderstanding with Momo that occurred afterwards did hurt to watch, but I know it’ll get resolved later on because Momo does jump into conclusions first before thinking things through.

Another part of the comedy that I like was the sudden transition to baseball as Turbo Granny throws the golden ball back into Okarun. The best part about this sequence is Seiko swinging her bat as if she was the batter. I got a good laugh out of that sequence. I know Japan loves baseball, but I did NOT expect that it would be a way for him to get his ballsack back into his body.

While the episode was mainly comedy, I did like how it instantly transitioned into the serious, paranormal stuff instantaneously. Like, the kids are still in school and suddenly, an alien trapped them in their domain. They’re separated too. Momo is by herself in a place filled with water as some sort of dinosaur-like creature appears to shoot laser beams. Given that Flatwoods Monster was shown in episode 2 and that urban legends do exist in this story, does that mean this aquatic plesiosaur creature is the Loch Ness Monster?

With Okarun and Aira, they encounter the Serpoians. I was worried that they might go after Aira, but their target is actually Okarun as they want his junk because they believe it’s magical. I’m actually surprised that alien harassment goes for both genders in this story because usually, the author would make it so they attack only females. That’s pretty rare. Also, what’s with the crab alien with the boxing gloves? What sort of song is it singing?

The anime continues with high quality casting as Tomokazu Seki joins the cast as the crab alien with the boxing gloves. If you’re not familiar with him, Seki voices Kougami from Psycho-pass and Sanemi Shinazugawa from Demon Slayer. Kazuya Nakai returns as all three Serpoians. Though, Seki’s character has little screen-time other than him singing. I do hope it gets more screen time in the next episode. Also, Ayane Sakura’s deep voice in her youkai form was excellent. Wow.

Oh, and I’ve watched this episode in both Japanese and English dub and both versions are really great. I have to make a shout out to AJ Beckles who voices Okarun. I really liked the exasperation his voice had when he learned about Aira studying about romance through magazines and other stuff in her father’s study. I know that there’s a sub vs dub debate in the western anime community, but I think it’s all stupid. I think dubbed anime is getting better in recent years when there’s good direction and voice actors. Dandadan is filled with both.

I honestly can’t wait to see what the next episode has to offer as it seems that the group is dealing with the supposed Loch Ness Monster, the crab alien and the Serpoians all at once. I can’t wait to see how it all plays out and if it’ll be paced well. What are your thoughts on this episode?

[iguessitsjustme]

Listen. I have my issues with the hangman game (and with the show as a whole) but I need to mention two things:

The ENTIRE time they were playing that game I was like "boss is gonna lose because he has made certain assumptions about Joke because of his Joker persona. Boy can't spell. Boy failed school. Sucks to suck boss you dumbass.

I did not see Rose using the word "dickhead" but that was the funniest thing in the world to me and actually the only good part of that whole murder game.

[ellecdc]

read your poly!rosestarkiller x reader thing and i'm absolutely in love 😭❤

also, a thought i had: rosestarkiller x muggleborn!reader would be so funny, specially if she befriend lily (+ remus)

i read a regulus x reader thing once where y/n was a muggleborn and she shows him what a pen is. and this with them would be the funniest thing omg (barty would love pens, you cannot tell me otherwise)

and just the dynamic would be amusing: three pureblood boys dating a muggleborn girl. y/n would tell them a lot of things about the muggle world to them, maybe even showing them some things.

Hahahaa oh gosh. You’re right. They’d think she was magic (in a completely different way)

[03junkie]

prompt: headline || i fucking hate this it’s so meta😭 || wc: 463 || @rosekillermicrofic || listen to ‘c’est la vie (lip filler)

News channels hardly had anything worthwhile to post anymore. Makes sense why Evan was headlining the morning news for ‘going viral’ for doing the bare minimum online. Evan knew he was somewhat famous on TikTok, but he could hardly care about that. He’d seen that account as a way to let off steam from his less-than-ideal tattoo apprenticeship. Slowly though, he’d started to see it as a business opportunity, so that he could have some disposable income in his pocket.

He hadn’t ever expected for his face to be plastered on local news alongside with an image of an objectively awful rapper. Evan was sure this man got lucky with his music, because there was no bleeding way anyone would unironically listen to what he put out. Evan had to admit though, the man was good-looking, and exactly his type. He had a rather goofy name too; Barty Crouch Jr. Evan would’ve ended his life if he was called Barty.

Anyway, Evan’s video played on loop as posh British accents narrated his “overnight success”. The video finally ceased, and he was met with the anchors’ faces. They were saying something about how they’ve got a special guest in the studio, and Evan was less than surprised with the fact that it was Barty Crouch Jr in the flesh. Evan was weirdly transfixed onto the screen.

‘So, Barty, we heard that this video did numbers for your song. Is that right?’ The woman to Barty’s right said.

‘Oh yeah, man. It’s crazy, really.’ The anchors looked less than pleased with this answer.

‘And what does your family have to say about it?’

‘As if I’d tell ‘em. They still think I’m rutting about at med school.’ At this, he laughs like it’s the funniest thing in the world.

‘Well, do you plan to let them know?’ The anchors look uncomfortable now.

‘Yeah, for sure, if I want to lose my inheritance.’ Barty scrutinised the pair in front of him, almost watching them squirm in discomfort.

‘Er, what did you think of Evan Rosier’s video, seeing as it brought you so much fame?’ Barty had a grin on his face.

‘Fine shit. If you’re watching this, Rosier, hit me up, yeah? Maybe you can give me another hit. I’ve got a feelin’ we’d work well together.’ Evan was smiling too, subconsciously pulling his phone out his pocket. There were already a few comments on the video in question, all targeted towards this particular interview.

Evan opened Barty’s account, first following him, and then opening his newest post. Without thinking he commented, ‘hate ur song xx’.

[koneko-chan]

𝕴 𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖑 𝖕𝖗𝖔𝖙𝖊𝖈𝖙 𝖞𝖔𝖚 (sound of salt falling weakly to the table) hyah hyah hyah

[recapitulation]

[scoobydoodean]

Putting together a catholic samgirl scrapbook.

[gottabescientific]

Monty visibly going "what? WHO???" when pasta accepts the tkachuk fight

[charnel-doll]

i was looking at berserk stuff on etsy and i just gotta ask

if the twink who dyes his hair white who youd been dating for less than a month handed this to you, how fast would you run away

[paintedcrows]

Whenever Bill sees KingOfNJ's fics through Stan's eyes he just thinks they have the same taste in fanfiction (disgusting. unthinkable) continued

[nature-played-a-trick-on-me]

In genetic genealogy there is this thing or concept, how you inherit about 50% of your mother's DNA and about 50% of your dad's DNA, so if you AND both of your parents were to get DNA testing, you could 'make' a (digital) genetic 'sibling' using the other 50% of DNA of either parent that you didn't inherit, and that sibling is called. The evil twin.

[sonata-stigmata]

can't stop saying sigma when I see your url in my notifs literally every single time

on my sigma stigmata she male grindset

[future-crab]

There is no evidence American rock band My Chemical Romance were ever arrested in France

x

[egophiliac]

Ernesto Foulworth and Gino… it wouldn’t surprise me if they had fake identities

I accept this explanation

(the problem is that I had a very regionally-specific immediate thought and I could not get it out of my head)

(sorry this is messier than usual, I refuse to put more effort into it than it deserves)

[eowyn-igneelcheshire]

One of my favorite things in the LOTR books is Sam being obsessed with Elven magic and wanting to see it and when Galadriel finds out she basically tells Sam "I don't know what the fuck magic is but I can show you the future in this bowl of water if you want" as if that's just a normal ass thing to be able to do.