#this is soooo rambly

[tumortain]

i wish the main focus of this book was the detective trying to juggle all their responsibilities. and failing miserably lol.

i was so disappointed when i got to just call tina to cover for mc at the station and she was like “haha ofc <3″ and from what i remember she was ok with it even if she didn’t know The Truth like wtf.... people are being kidnaped left and right, the town’s only detective goes AWOL and no one bats an eye? and don’t even get me started on the chamber, you can be like “i fail at everything i do” and they still will want to suck your dick dfkjdslkjfs???? so goofy.

idk but seeing mc fail at being there both for UB and missions with them and tina and verda and their job as the detective would be a better catalyst for internal and external conflict than whatever the fuck All of That was. 

and the ending would make much more sense. mc looks back at all the times they had to choose between their new and old lives and finally comes to terms with the fact that now that they Know The Truth they can’t leave the supernatural world and even if they don’t want to they have to leave the station and become an agent and like you can be happy or not about it but it is what it is. they accept the promotion knowing that they are leaving something behind. it’s a bittersweet but needed moment.

because it threw me off!!! so much!!! when mommy dearest showed up and was like you’re an agent now byeeee~. i get that with all that soul bonding bs it is your destiny~ but after all the shit mc goes thru the book i felt so drained and confused so when rebecca told mc abt the promotion it felt... so helpless? 

and i was like oh ok it’s somethingsomething MC and Sin parallel somethingsometing moment. that’s fun ig?? and i’d be ok with it if the book didn’t end with that GODDAMN PARTY hfjsdkf like i get wanting to end on a high note but uhhhh that was not a way to go about it imo. i wanted to tell them all to go to hell leave me alone so bad LMFAO.

[hoshizoralone]

reflection

[cacaocheri]

this happens to me at least three times on a daily basis

[purinfelix]

Y'ALL OH MY GOD

i'm actually going insane

(credits to sainterosie on twt for the hd versions!!)

[wu-does-art]

thinking about Nico adjusting to letting himself miss and long for the people he loves. based on these bits from the sun and the star:

" As Nico and Will followed the trogs, he thought about how much he missed Hazel. He was learning to make peace with that feeling. It was okay for him to miss people because that meant he wanted them around in his life. That idea was *very* new for him- he was used to either pushing people away or watching them recoil from his presence." *

" That was the most surreal thing of all... Was he happy? Nico wasn't very familiar with the sensation, but he couldn't deny that he felt wonderful in Will's presence. He even longed for the son of Apollo when they were apart. A funny thing had happened as the two grew closer: Nico suddenly understood all those cheesy, sappy love songs he'd always hated."

[tojisun]

size kink but it’s him pressing on your stomach to ‘see’ how deep his cock is. he truly means it even when you’re sure he won’t feel himself past your fat and your flesh, but the surety in his voice and in his actions just make you clench around him tighter, your mind fraying at the edges because there’s something maddening at his honest belief. at his drunken voice lilting how he must be ‘here’, deep in your guts and that if he just pushes any more, he swears he can feel himself nestled lovingly inside you :((

[avephelis]

thinking about owl house bisexuality truly nobody fucking did it like them

[dnpgiggle]

obsessed with phil saying ‘I decided to not get traumatized by this’ he’s literally the wisest of us

[finns-gay-thoughts]

hi can we cuddle. i miss your face. hi can we cuddle. i like feeling your skin on mine. i like you. can we cuddle. can we cuddle can we cuddle can we cuddle can we c

[randomminty]

Five billion octopath 2 scribbles i feel sick

[egonkula]

"I don't think Logan would have said that, his minivan speech was so messed up!!" are we talking about the same logan??? logan in EVERY universe would say that im afraid. he is actually a mean bitch who loves to project his issues onto others!! so why are we surprised when he does it !!!

[chassisfucker]

probably my favourite maxism is when he tells a joke and for like the second after it he holds that perfectly blank face before cracking up at whatever he just said. and like his whole face lights up with the force of it.

[huginsmemory]

On ad astra per aspera ✨

Can we talk about the repeated use of ad astra per aspera? Cause uhhhh it shows up twice, once on the website and once in the Book of Bill, and OH BOY this has connotations, both for Bill and Ford's relation in the literal and figurative meaning on the word, and for Bill's own history:

(extra addition added 16/09/2024! 🌝 )

First, in the website (if I recall correctly) if the phrase ad astra per aspera is inputted into the computer, you get the two pages on Bill's 'funeral':

And within, in the pages, at the very end before signing there names is the phrase itself (highlighted in red) .

Secondly, a joke version of it is seen in the Book Of Bill, specifically on the night where Bill and Ford fucked 'one thing led to another':

In this one, it's clearly a joke off of aspirin used for his hangover, used again to close the entry.

Now the phrase ad astra per aspera itself means 'through suffering to the stars', which also has... wider connotations then just these two piece alone, which I'll unpack later. But first, the interesting choice of connection of these two pieces;

Both times the phrases occur, they occur closing the entry; a bit too much of a coincidence to me (and in this fandom there is no such thing as a coincidence). Considering that the 'one thing led to another' night is a night that was important to their relationship as it hints at the intimacy they had with each other, it showing up again in Ford's 'funeral' entry about Bill feels very much like an allusion to that night. Especially considering in the funeral entry Ford is very open about how much he cared about Bill, with how he at one point "considered him the centre of his life". The entry from Ford reads as someone who is moving on, and part of this is acknowledgement of the grief and sadness for the more positive part of the abusive relationship that he lost. As a result, having him acknowledge the intimacy of their relationship, it makes sense for him to tongue in cheek allude back to his first writing down of the phrase, where they were quite clearly implied to fuck be intimate.

While it alludes to their Bill and Ford's intimacy, the literal and metaphorical meaning of the phrase also rings true here; through suffering to the stars. If we talk literally, then through Ford's relationship with Bill, something that ultimately was full of suffering, he built the portal, and ended up wandering the myriad worlds out there in space; one may say out there among the stars. He literally was out there wandering the stars as a result of suffering.

Now metaphorically, the phrase means through suffering/adversity one gains beautiful/worthwhile things. Considering this entry is Ford moving on from Bill, this is very apt; again, their relationship caused Ford immense suffering, and as he is now letting that relationship and suffering go, he's instead prioritizing creating healthy relationships with Stanley, the other twins and Fiddleford (the something beautiful and worthwhile part!). In fact, the entry on Bill's funeral is half on him strengthening his relationship with Mabel, the shooting star, another layer of wordplay; case in point about the healthy relationships. He's weathered through his abusive relationship, to discover and create a loving family.

It doesn't quite end there however; although that's fairly it for specifically Ford and Bill's relationship, we also haven't talked about what the stars mean to Bill himself. Which, well; it's very clearly implied that Bill accidentally killed everyone in his dimension in an attempt to show his parents (and other people in his dimension) the stars. And on top of that, to quote; "I looked up and saw the stars. And I was ready to become one of them". Which he then in a way, becomes, considering the page in journal 3 on constellations, in which Ford remarks that one of his favourite constellations is the constellation 'William' (obviously Bill). It's a bittersweet immortalization of himself after everything that occurs around trying to see the stars for Bill.

So I find it very interesting that for Ford, a phrase about suffering and stars is something he ends up correlating to his relationship with Bill, considering that to Bill, to get to the stars is something he deeply suffered for as a result. It's also important to note that Bill's suffering was something that occurred out of love, and ultimately an attempt to be understood and create a deeper relationship with his parents where they could trust him. And then for Ford, all this while later, to look up to the stars (to see them) and to see the Bill constellation and go 'oh that's one of my favourites' is fulfillment. Because Ford during that time trusted and cared deeply for Bill, fulfilling that relationship of trust, love and understanding(at least surface level, considering the way they banter together), that Bill had yearned for when he was younger and killed his plane.

So all in all(tldr): ad aspera per astra, (through suffering the stars), is quite the fun phrase to unpack in regards to Bill and Ford's relationship, considering the deliberate reference to the phrase on the entry about the night 'where one thing led to another' and Bill's funeral entry. The phrase is a combination of references; tongue in cheek allusion to the intimacy, but also references to the literal (space fugitive) and figurative (abusive relationship, to loving family again pipeline) hardships Ford endured as a result of the relationship. There is also irony in the way that Ford seems to correlate this phrase about suffering and stars with Bill and his relationship, considering that out of an effort to be understood and share the stars with his parents, Bill accidentally killed his whole dimension; later he also made a constellation of himself. As well, as Ford says that one of his favourite constellations is a constellation that's clearly Bill in Journal 3, it alludes to that Bill's wish to show his parents the stars and be recognized is fulfilled by Ford (pre-portal incident that is).

EDIT: extra details added on the constellation piece as of Aug 14 2024 (less than 24 hours after og posting, because I'm deranged). Big thanks to @bowl-o-nudel for the nudge :)

Edit (16/09/2024): I've had a few people say that the saying has appeared in Journal 3 multiple times, and having reread journal 3, to my delight it is indeed correct! And oh the CONTEXT they give. The two instances are those seem below; the first appearance in the title page of Journal 3, and second time is a page from when the twins graduate.

As well as all the parallels of how the phrase is applied for both Bill and Ford, as @zoizyboigy suggested, it seems to be a phrase that Ford takes as his own motto. It seems to be a highly personal motto to him; after all, they all are written around important turning moments in Ford's life; graduating, the journals which where to be his ticket to fame, fucking a triangle finding acceptance and intimacy with Bill , and lastly, moving on in his life from Bill and his destructive obsession with recognition. 

And it makes sense WHY this motto is one that is highly personal to Ford; the first time it is seen chronologically is when he's graduating, chosen when he believes he's going to be accepted into the university. It's a motto he chose because he was excited, because he thought he was already through his suffering and arriving to the stars of his fancy university, where validation and acceptance would abound; only that doesn't happen, and the suffering part within the motto is the only thing that's accurate, especially as that's when he rejects Stan. It's a motto chosen in celebration, that becomes a reminder of the failure to become someone who is accepted and important (and his prioritization of validation over relationships); it's now something he holds that reminds him of the validation he believes he deserves and he obsessively chases. 

And that's why you see it in the journal pages, because these journals are going to change his life, he's going to become finally a person of importance and be accepted with the information he's compiled in the journals. And in the same way, you see it after Bill (and interdimensional being of ancient knowledge) and him are intimate; he's become someone of importance to Bill, he's been accepted by Bill, even attractive to Bill (romance Ford seems to have terrible luck in).

And that's why you see it at the end of Ford's farewell to Bill; it's another turning point, it's Ford letting his obsession with world validation go which characterized it's meaning from the beginning, Ford letting go of his relationship with Bill, which it also came to mean, and instead celebrates his acceptance within his family and the strengthening of those bonds, and of prioritizing healthy, loving relationships.

Ps, if you enjoyed this meta post, I've also made another one, on exceptionalism!

[divinesolas]

this is the type of beauty they would write ballads and poems about

[deathsmallcaps]

I love how Dev Patel’s Character (I’m going to call him Hanuman) was told by his mother that his future can be found in the roots (lines) of his hands.

And how he tried to save his mother from the fire, grabbing with child’s hands, but instead burned his future away.

And how our first real view of them is when he bargains his way into a job that will lead him to the men that took his future away. Scarred, pale, blank and ruined.

Just like the monkey, Hanuman reached out to the burning desired life, and was supposedly stripped of his potential and power as punishment by the powers that be.

But then, with love and care from others battered, he was guided to his heart, and found it still beating and unfettered. A warrior’s heart.

And so drumbeat by drumbeat, he shaped himself, his hands, into a weapon of justice. To save the future. To remain nameless but to return vengeance upon those who would do others harm with no thought.

His hands, created by the past, shaped and balanced the future.

[festivating]

glinda running away screaming and crying and then standing against the wall and closing her eyes and waiting for death... elphaba saw firsthand how much of a TERRIBLE fugitive glinda would've been and was still like mmm yes please come with me we'll be the greatest team there's ever been. she loves glinda so dearly.