#this is something i want to incorporate into my life
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
1. What category of alterhumanity do you belong to?
Polymorph alterhuman, otherkin, copinglinker, otherhearted, fictionkin.
2. What/who is/are your types?
Polymorph and harpy otherkin. Specifically, polymorph cladokin and harpy cladokin. (Also polymorph alterhuman.)
I identify as all types of harpies, from the ones that are just birds with women heads, to the gangly rotting hags, to the fluffy feathered feral bird women.
I also identify as all type of polymorphs and I identify as the overall state of being a polymorph.
And I’m Joel Dawson fictionkin from the 2020 movie Love and Monsters.
3. Do you experience shifts? If so, can you tell us your most common shifts and your strangest cameo shift (if you've ever had a cameo shift)?
I experience shifts. My most common are mental shifts and then phantom shifts.
Strangest cameo shifts: As a polymorphkin, I get cameo shifts all the time. I was at Giant one time with my dad. I was having a very intense (what I think was a) dragon cameo shift. I could feel fangs, snout, a tail, claws, and wings. I was making what was probably weird facial expressions as I was trying to get used to the feeling of the muzzle and fangs.
As I started stretching out the wings, this little girl and her mom walked by me and, I kid you not!, the girl’s face lit up with joy and wonder, pointed and looked up at me in the eyes, and said “A dragon! 😃”. The mom then yanked her away and said something like “Don’t point at people.” Lmao.
My dad was so weirded out and confused lol. 😂 But I was so happy. <3 I wish that I could have been a harpy shift that was noticed, but this was still an incredible experience that I’ll always remember.
And yes I did look behind me and no, there were no dragon items behind me.
4. How do you experience your alterhumanity in everyday life?
Hmm. Well, I see myself as a harpy that just doesn’t have feathers nor wings. I try to incorporate aspects of harpies into everyday life.
Also on all levels but physical I am a polymorph. Literally I do shapeshift, just not physically. (If that at all makes sense lol😅?) I am constantly copying, reflected, and shifting (nonphysically) depending on what’s around me, to fit in my environment.
5. What do you think of the community?
Overall I love it. I love how welcoming it is. And I love how a week or so ago I (a harpy) drove a siren and then had dinner with some werewolves haha. I do wish there wasn’t so much petty drama whenever someone doesn’t believe in everything the other person believes in. What happened to this being highly theoretical and based on nonproven stuff?
If we want to cancel someone it should be because they are genuine danger to society or to the community. Not because they didn’t tag your identity in a post or because you don’t like their hobbies.
(Not saying this happened recently, just that when it happens it makes me roll my eyes.)
6. What are the things that make you most comfortable and euphoric in your alterhumanity?
My gear, shawls and warm loose sweaters, sun bathing, bitting individual seeds off granola bars, overeating 🥲, vocals, drone videos, bone collecting and cleaning, collecting shinies, jewelry, corvidcore and cryptidcore clothing, eating Greek food.
Things that make me feel overall nonhuman and/or animalistic. Floating in water, practicing mimicking the movements/body language of animals and people, mimicking animal noises, drawing.
7. Are you experiencing species dysphoria?
Yes. It’s not as bad as when I was younger, when seeing my reflection would cause me to fall to the ground crying. But it is still there.
8. What advice would you like to say to a young alterhuman who has just awakened?
Take your time. There is no rush to find yourself.
Also use vague wording when journaling. Example: “I had a wolf snout shift=❌” , “I had a phantom shift of a long snout that was pointed and had sharp but strong teeth and fur=✅”
9. Do you have/want to have gears?
I have a pair of wings and tail feathers made of foam. Ear cuffs with feathers. A yarn tail. A mask of my copinglink type and a harpy mask. Some collars and a harness. Lots of jewelry. Shawls and cozy sweaters. Fangs. Bird feet.
10. Do you know/have any theories about the origin of your alterhumanity? If so, tell us! (all beliefs are legitimate)
For being a polymorph, it’s a mess of reasons. 😅 For being a harpy, I don’t really know. For being Joel Dawson, it’s solely spiritual. TLDR Do to isolation from people I imprinted on many animals. I derived my behaviors and instincts from animals, instead of people.
Yeah it’s complicated. If you’d like to know more read this old Amino post. It’s a bit outdated when it talks about my mental health, medication, and sexuality, but overall it’s still very accurate! :)
http://aminoapps.com/p/yld4a20
11. Tag someone/a creature to answer these questions!
@meowing-creature
@vulpenthefox
:3 Would love to read what you guys say! (Also I’m sorry if you’ve already completed this.😅)
If you are a alterhuman, reblog and answer these questions!
(don't be afraid to write a lot, do what you want ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)
1/ Which category of alterhumanity do you belong to?
2/ What/who is/are your type(s)? (if you have any)
3/ Do you experience shifts? If so, can you tell us your most common shifts and your strangest cameo shift (if you've ever had a cameo shift)?
4/ How do you experience your alterhumanity in everyday life?
5/ What do you think of the community?
6/ What are the things that make you most comfortable and euphoric in your alterhumanity?
7/ Are you experiencing species dysphoria?
8/ What advice would you like to say to a young alterhuman who has just awakened?
9/ Do you have/want to have gears?
10/ Do you know/have any theories about the origin of your alterhumanity? If so, tell us! (all beliefs are legitimate)
11/ Tag someone/a creature to answer these questions!ㅤᵕ̈
#otherkin#wilder’s rambles#alterhuman#harpykin#fictionkin#polymorph#joel dawson fictionkin#mythkin#love and monsters#love and monsters 2020#monsterkin
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
My top 24 screenshots from 2024
Thanks for the tag @changingplumbob
Apparently I have 6000 files from 2024, so it's taken me a while to narrow it down to 24! Oh yeah, and I have a Bluesky account that I need to plug more.
Yee-Haw I turned one of @golyhawhaw's hunks of Sim into a cowboy, and I need to work out how to incorporate him into my generational family somewhere.
2. Sean and Galen's last vacation in Tomarang.
3. Sean and Galen's grandparent-chic living room.
4. Rafał's wedding day,
5. Sims Sessions needs to come back, with some new artists. Should be a permanent fixture!
6. BLOBBY
7. The time the new creepy teacher got me nearly 2K upvotes on Reddit
8. Alex and Alistair giving RWRB vibes
9. I miss when these damn festivals worked properly.
10. Streetwalking at the Career Expo
11. I love San Sequoia, but need to play in it more often.
12. I finally BUILT SOMETHING this year.
13. Built this house back in....2020? Finally made use of it.
14. Sunset! Also I have straight couples too.
15. I hate Karaoke in real life, but always have time to watch Markos belt out a song.
16. Thought this shot was cute, Tucker and Kaden at Prom.
17. When the Borg decided to show up and assimilate Ciudad Enamorada thanks to a lot I downloaded.
18. Galen and Sean again, played with these two for years and this is the year to move on now Life and Death is out.
19. This guy decides to show up in Henford on Bagley's produce stand.
20. Galen's funeral. Though I wanted to try out the features of Life and Death, this was sad.
21. Dunno, I liked the colours. Wish more Sims would show up to the Night Market's though. Memories of Phuket.
22. Isabela and Omar's wedding day.
23. Recent one, but I'm starting to use Deco sims more often now. Liked the Red Carpet setup I had going here.
24. Another new one, just liked the composition here.
2025 is coming up quickly and lets see how our screenshots evolve.
I'll tag some random people, so if you want to join in, feel free @nornities @nova-kim @bloomingkyras @rebouks @alexpilgrimblog
@cinnybunsims @depictingdrew @perolesims
28 notes
·
View notes
Note
this may be a silly question but whats your process for writing smut? i can write fanfic, but when it comes to just positioning and pace of writing smut, i literally feel like i have no idea what i am doing. you clearly EXCEL at it so im wondering you’d ever share your process? thank you
this isn't a silly question and i'm delighted you asked me! also so lovely to hear you think i excel at it, i love writing it and always am overjoyed to hear people enjoy reading it 💕
i don't know how much help i can be, but for me, smut writing is usually (1) hot image or line of dialogue pops into my head and (2) sitting down and writing it. while i'm writing, everything plays out like a movie in my head. like i visualize literally everything, which makes smut writing much easier. i often feel with smut writing i'm just transcribing stuff that's playing out in my brain. i also am just... terminally horny.
BUT i have tips to make smut writing better/easier:
Kill the cop inside your head
So many smut writers feel shame about writing smut. There's nothing shameful about it! It's fun, it's normal, it's a healthy way to explore your own sexuality and ideas and concepts and dynamics. I think of it like a sandbox. There are loads of things I write in smut that I would never want to do in real life, but it's fun getting to play around with them in a safe space.
If there's a voice in your brain saying, "This is weird, this is something I should be embarrassed about," that's not some objective truth. That's a lot of culture being weird about sex and desire and thinking it's something that should be shamed and controlled. Not to be all "writing smut is a radical act of resistance," but like... it sort of is.
2. Tap into one characters' point of view
A lot of smut reads like porn. Like you're sort of watching the author mash Barbies together, but the Barbies don't really have thoughts or feelings. I always find it weird when the POV character's body or appearance gets excessively described during smut. Like why is the POV character thinking about their tight little nipples or whatever. Unless the POV character is actively thinking about how the other character is perceiving them, it's confusing to write about the POV character's appearance.
Also - think about what the POV character finds hot about the sex! Like you're not just writing about sex between two people, you're writing about sex between these characters specifically. Think about what about their personality, appearance, whatever that each character finds hot. That'll make your smut unique rather than feeling like it could be happening between any two characters.
3. Read lots of smut and figure out what you like about it
Just find smut you like. Read it with a critical eye and figure out what you like about it. Look at the writing structure, the dialogue, how the author describes orgasms, sensations, feelings. Try to incorporate some of that into your own writing.
4. Be weird
I've read a lot of smut, and so much of it feels indistinguishable from each other. The top thrusts once, twice, three times and then comes. The bottom begs to get fucked and says "I can take it" when the top tries to give them a third finger. Characters always need exactly three fingers before they can be fucked.
Be weird! It's ok to write smut differently than how other people write it. That's part of what makes fic so interesting! I love reading weird smut that's written by someone who was just clearly really into it. Like I want unique, fun smut! If you're into it/you find it hot, readers will too. Don't think you have to write smut in the way all the most popular fics write smut.
I don't know how helpful this is, especially because I have loads of criticisms of my own smut writing, but hopefully this is interesting, at least!
26 notes
·
View notes
Text
A low/no-angst WangXian podfic rec list for hard times and cozy days
This list is far from complete and incorporates suggestions from the MDZS podfic discord server as well as comments on the last iteration of this post. But in the end, this is only my opinion of what’s cozy and low-angst, so please make sure to read the tags yourself before embarking if you’re feeling sensitive!
(list is alphabetical by title)
a garden in your ribcage by puddingcatbeans, G, podfic by GinevraFangirl (1 hour 48 min) – there’s just something about this one, a modern-with-magic AU focusing on plant magic, that gets me and feels so soft.
Accidents Will Happen by vesna, E, podfic by AuntieIroh (6 hours 26 min) – soft, post-canon mpreg. A little angst and illness, but mostly very sweet.
and having a marvelous time by varnes, M, podfic by Spinifex (13 hours 43 min) – this is a very sweet Sound of Music AU and Spinifex’s voices just KILL me.
Bodega Love by cicer, T, podfics by a big group in 2020 possibly for an event? (1 hour 16 min) and by Lotus Pier Lakeside team for VT Mystery Box 2023 (1 hour 37 min) – another very funny Modern AU with insane podfic energy
grow by cafecliche, T, podfic by jellyfishfire (1 hour 32 min) – post-canon, wwx is de-aged. Honestly I don’t remember this super well but it was recced by lightningshowl and I remember liking it. I’ll relisten and report back soon!
i know who i want to take me home by ScarlettStorm, E, podfic by rionaa (1 hour 45 min ish) – wwx finds a very drunk lwj in his bar and has to take care of him until his brother comes to get him (and then later they get together). I just love the fic and rionaa + Thali’s reading is so sweet.
in the shadow of moonlit flowers by Reverie (cl410), T, podfic by raitala (5+ hours). Lwj can tell when people are lying. It’s soft and lyrical and very soothing imho.
it is wednesday, my dudes by ritualist, M, podfic by jellyfishfire (26 min) – wwx is a health and safety inspector and needs to check out the strip club where lwj works. This podfic makes me laugh every single time.
leave all your love and your longing behind by ScarlettStorm (a.k.a. The Asshole Dog fic), E, podfic by rionaa (between 10-15 hours, I didn’t look up the exact number, sorry!) - not entirely angst-free but this podfic is my happy place. Modern AU, lwj and wwx have a chance meeting and get to know each other and fall in love, of course.
Lost Boys by raitala, E, podfic by KeriArentikai (13 hours 41 minutes) – Modern AU, wwx and a-yuan are reunited with lwj after a long time and move in with him. Not angst-free, entirely, but it’s very soft and absolutely what I listened to when I was sick and needed a blanket in a podfic.
lovely thorns and singing crows by isabilightwood, E, podfics by exmanhater (3 hours 30 min) and semperfiona (4 hours 10 min) – super fun Addams-family vibes modern AU. Maybe not traditional comfort reading, but soft and fun.
Magical Marriage Ribbons by starandrea, Not Rated (but a bit of sex), podfic by dangercupcake (19.5 hours so far) – alt-canon, wangxian get together as teens, soft vignette style. It’s not an angst-free fic but it’s definitely a comfort listen for me.
Meng Yao vs. the Board of the Homeowner's Association by Ariaste, E, podfics by rionaa et al. (some length!) and GinevraFangirl et al. (also some length!) - another funny, manic modern AU to get your mind off of things.
My Leaves Reach Ever for the Sun by nonplussed, T, podfic by neireid (3.5-4 hours) - I can’t sum it up better than the author: “AKA the fic where WWX crossdresses his way into winning his life, love, and liberty”.
plant a little happiness (let the roots run deep) by fleurdeliser, E, podfics by exmanhater (4 hours 26 min) and knight_tracer (4 hours 52 min) – I’ll admit I don’t remember this one too well, but it was recced by flamingwell, LadyEn and addictedtostoriesandcrochet, so it’s clearly a winner. Another one to add more comments to once I’ve relistened!
save a sword, ride a socialist by sysrae, E, podfic by exmanhater (3 hours 15 min) – funny modern-with-magic, wwx-is-a-gremlin AU. Maybe not exactly what I’d consider a comfort listen, but definitely a good, light distraction listen.
Seasons of Love by sweetlittlevampire, T, podfic by kisahawklin (some amount of time!) - very soft bunny-based modern AU
shades of grey spill from my veins (bleeding ink all over the page) by Reverie (cl410), M, podfic by KeriArentikai (8 hours 10 minutes) – wwx raised by the Nie, told in a vignette style for the most part. It makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside.
Somewhere I Belong by athena_crikey, E, podfic by zaffre (2 hours 6 minutes). Pilot!wwx takes scientist!lwj into the north of the Prairies and they hit it off.
stray cat strut by ScarlettStorm, E, podfic by KeriArentikai (6 hours 17 min). Canon-era, wwx gets trapped as a cat! And then a catboy! Very cute, funny, low-stakes fic.
The Peanut Butter Jar AU by ScarlettStorm, E, podfic of fic 1 by Khashana (3 hours 22 min), fic 2 by sunkitten_shash (4 hours 37 min) – fox-shifter WWX gets in a bit of trouble and is saved by animal-rescue worker LWJ. Super funny and quite light.
The Wild Geese's Tomb by The Feels Whale, T, podfic by kealdrakemna (8 hours 16 min) – time-travel fix-it that just makes everything a bit better.
this moonlit heart is home by Selenay, M, podfic by exmanhater (55 min) – cat!wwx! Very cute
through a window softly by impossibletruths, T, podfic by Rhea314 (1 hour 48 min) – yet another one I need to relisten to, but that I remember liking and that was recced by addictedtostoriesandcrochet.
without your new eyes by anaphoricae, E, podfic by LadyEn (7 hours 29 min) – soft didn’t-know-they-were-dating fic
Work in Tandem by MimiSpearmint, E, podfic by GinevraFangirl (2 hours 36 min) – modern with magic; wwx is Lan Sizhui’s flying instructor and is into his hot dad.
I will hopefully continue to update this as appropriate fics come to my attention. Everyone has different tastes as to what constitutes a soft comfort listen, but I'm extremely happy to hear suggestions of what should be added.
19 notes
·
View notes
Note
So bizarre to see fanboys jumping through hoops to find a way they can incorporate as many of Mat's plot points from TDR and TSR into their imagined version of s3 but NOT include Cauthor CPR. I'm sorry the cursed dagger on a spear makes you mad but you're okay with Min or Nynaeve saving him from hanging???
smh!!!! mat only does 1 important thing in all of TDR and TSR, and that is receive mouth-to-mouth from rand. and they would rather sacrifice that than any of his other stuff!
if it can't be rand, then nynaeve would be an okay substitute since she knows healing and hasn't had any chances for a good emotional moment with mat yet; however, imo if she has TOO many moments of successfully helping her friends via non-magical means, it would lessen the urgency of needing to break her block. thus, nynaeve saving mat with CPR would arguably be counterproductive to *her* arc of needing to break her block. (unless it instead is the trigger moment that causes her to break her block and she's thus able to heal him magically, but, while that's a sweet idea, it doesn't make much narrative sense for mat to be the one serving such an important emotional role in nynaeve's arc, no offense to him haha)
as for min, there's no need for the show to outsize her and mat's emotional connection i.e. they need to be good friends early on to make their series endgame work better, yes, but they do not need to be (and shouldn't be) each other's #1 most important emotional connection for two seasons straight. think of the heteronormative ship-baiting it would cause for show-onlys if mat and min had a focal emotional connection for two seasons straight culminating in her giving him mouth-to-mouth! ain't happening.
and all that being said..............as of now there's no reason to believe it can't be rand giving mat CPR! mat not being part of the waste storyline by no means precludes his doorway incident from occurring in a way that can involve rand. it could happen in the first couple of episodes before the gang's split up. it could happen in the finale with mat entering one doorway in tanchico and getting yeeted out into rand's lap on the other side of the continent because the pattern craves cauthor.
plus, with this scene being perhaps the single biggest and most iconic rand-mat emotional moment in the entire book series, i don't see why the show would instead give it to a different - and less important - mat relationship. (unless they absolutely had to because it turned out to be logistically impossible for it to be with rand, but, again, we have no reason to think that's the case.) if you look at the whole series, rand is more emotionally integral to mat and his story than nynaeve or min are, so why shouldn't he be the one mat has this big moment with? plus, if mat vs. couladin is in the cards for s4, iirc mat's implied motive there is that he intentionally hunted down couladin during the battle to help out rand even if he makes it sound like it was an accident, so s3 Cauthor CPR would set up a) how ride-or-die these two are for each other and b) mat feeling like he owes rand big time for saving his life, and wanting to do something major to return the favor.
overall, the fanboys often have really strange priorities when it comes to judging which book events are important to the overall story (Male Badassery) and which aren't (Everything Else), and their show predictions reflect those priorities very tellingly. i mean, my show predictions also reflect MY priorities very tellingly, but my priorities are a lot closer to rafe's than the fanboys' are, which hopefully leads to more accurate predictions. if you think a gay showrunner isn't going to do everything he possibly can to fit in the iconic-to-the-gays moment of rand giving mat mouth-to-mouth, you're kidding yourself!
18 notes
·
View notes
Note
What the fuck sober life is made by one person. I thought it was a goncharov style mass hysteria thing
theres a whole subreddit dedicated to sober life memes that jimmy reacts to. i dont know if thats just one guy
#sober life smp#unreality#solidaritygaming#NOT REAL THIS IS A FAKE POST#SERIOUS ANSWER: yes and no. its made by me and anyone who decides to contribute something that i incorporate into my beliefs#sober life is whatever you want it to be. im not responsible for my actions#sober inbox#sober lore#sober screenshots
119 notes
·
View notes
Text
Shinran Week 2023 | Day 4:
Black Knight & Princess + Flowers
#shinranweek2023#shinran#dcmk#ran mouri#shinichi kudo#i tried my best to incorporate both themes#i wanted to make something for each prompt but may was a really stressful month for me#i did make ideas for each prompt though so i might draw them after the event#anyways!#the flowers i drew are based on pink camellias = longing#blue hyacinths = sincerity and loyalty#astilbe = patience and dedication#I'm not an expert though i just used google#Ran's dress color was one of the hardest decisions i had to make in my life#sorry I got the schedule date wrong
464 notes
·
View notes
Text
I find Dionysus in the lights of theatres, in both confident and joyful music, as well as the dancing that comes naturally to us with it. I find him at cosplaying, putting my passion for a character out there both in the making and in the portraying. In how I suddenly lean towards the extroverted side at anime events, in how I search to make others enjoy it all with me and smile the day away.
I find Dionysus in the decisions to take breaks. When I open my game of preference after a busy day or when I move around for a bit and dedicate some words to him. I find him when I let down my hair before going to sleep, when I take care of myself and shower, sometimes even fighting thoughts that would make me feel uncomfortable in my body. I find him in the reflection of a body that is free, of a soul that should be respected.
I find Dionysus in a reassuring feeling at night. In reflections on what I've gone through, in the acceptance of my value and efforts and the will to continue despite it all. And I find him in the healing, too; in the therapeutic talking out loud, in the quiet breaks to calm the fear, in a hug after an apology before falling asleep by his hand.
#dionysus#dionysus deity#deity worship#helpol#hellenic polythiest#hellenic polytheism#hellenic pagan#pagan#paganism#i wanted to write something like this bevause i've had a lot of ideas surrounding this recently#i often see people wondering how they can connect with him if they dont drink and things like that and tbh i was one of those people when i+#suddenly felt like getting to know him and incorporating him in my practice#well#more like in my life#that sounds more correct to me#again a bit personal but i wanted to share it#paganblr#my experience#my writing
69 notes
·
View notes
Text
More misc. daily life pictures and such
#image commentary in tags once again since they don't allow captions anymore and I feel weird using the alt text for that --#1 & 2 - Very bright pretty looking sky !#2. HUGE icicle that looked like you could kill someone with it or something.. Pulled from near a gutter on the side of a building#3. & 4 & 5 - various images from a silly party I had where I pretended to be some elf king turning like 204 years old lol (also not like#a REAL party. Only my roommates were there really and we're all in the same household bubble.#just to clarify. I would never dare have a large party anyway given#my hermitous nature but on top of that.. didn't want there to be some implication that I'm having a Party while covid is still ongoing lol.#NEVER.. But I do love dressing up as some fantasy character so much.. The only thing that could ever bring a true hermit wizard#to engage with others socially is the prospect of connecting it somehow to fantasy worlds and costumes lol. One must simply dress up#as a silly 200 year old man from time to time and pretend you've never seen a balloon before in your life. etc.#6. bapy boye... feets#7. The main food that I made for the elderly elf man 'party'. which was a Deconstructed Beef Wellington (kind of as ajoke since I watch s#o many silly cooking competition shows and they always make stuff 'deconstructed' at the last minute when under time limits or whatever.)#I've wanted to make beef wellington a few times but Ithink to do it well I'd need like..an actual kitchen and a lot of time and#an oven that fully works to bake things and etc. etc. So I thought this would be an easier method. A thick steak cut round to kind of mimi#c the round tenderloin or whatever it is in a wellington. instead of the puff pastry being wrapped around - I just did star shaped cut outs#of pastry and baked them and put them on top (to go with the star theme). instead of mushroom duxelles being wrapped around in pastry#its in a little circle under the steak. and instead of mustard being brushed onto the meat I made a mustard gravy sauce type of thing#Then of course asparagus on the side.. my favorite... Though I know some wellington#also has a layer of prosciutto I think. or I saw one person use crepes. I didn't feel it was necessary to incorporate that too lol#8. bapy son helping me do a giant puzzle that took me hours and I had no idea it was actually that large of a puzzle#until I started putting it together and for some reason it made me stressed by the end instead of relaxed lol.. puzzle fatigue#photo diary
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
was thinking about my yellowjackets au again for the first time in a while. piper's plotline would adhere most closely to shauna's because she's the only one who could truly access that level of derangement. annabeth's is mostly taissa's but also a little bit of nat. hazel's is van's - obviously not personality-wise but her role in the narrative. which led me to deranged van gifsets which made me realize how much i WISH hazel had been allowed to express anything like the gifset below. growth for her is being proud of her own decision! she should stand by her own resurrection someday! why else did she come back?
#i will be incorporating this into my sequel fic#she gets to make rough choices to safeguard her own life and ultimately stand by them!#this is all i'm thinking about now like how would hazel get to this point? of owning her own decisions? she's nowhere near it in the canon#her last line in the hoo series is an expression of regret#idk i'm being hyperbolic bc the endpoint for my sequel fic is intentionally ambiguous about whether she's done something good/bad#but what would it take for her to lose any sense of shame about wanting to stay alive? hopefully not the same thing as van was doing#but ykw fuck it. girl dinner
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
see the longer I play with my understanding of my transmasc experience and dysphoria, the more I grapple with the conflict between mocking fragile masculinity for refusing to allow the use of 'feminine' things vs knowing more and more keenly how much dysphoria I would and do get whenever someone associates something I do or use or wear with femininity. and no amount of people insisting that using "feminine" things doesn't invalidate someone's gender, man or otherwise, seems to have any impact on that dysphoria
we do need to untangle cultural perceptions of masculine vs feminine and respect for a person's gender, manhood in particular in this discussion, but I almost feel like knowing that means it's my responsibility to refuse to engage with those ideas for my own gender — and the problem is that knowing this is not the common understanding means knowing that other people *will* associate my use of feminine things as some sort of contradiction with any masculinity I may wish to express or identify with, and no amount of understanding the concepts and holding the principles can erase the revulsion and pain and fear I feel at the thought of people associating me with some concept of womanhood that I adamantly *do not experience or identify with.* fuck.
#I don't think I can be free of the trappings of fragile masculinity#until such a time that flouting them *won't* directly result in my transmasc identity & experience being disrespected#and especially as I cannot medically transition the way I want to#my expression and presentation is the *only* way to give people any impression of masculinity about me#and so choosing to incorporate things consider unmasculine into those just. fucks me up I guess#all this brought about bc I've decided I want some sort of bag to carry a notebook +pencils etc around in#but I am not willing to carry a purse. and so the thought occurred to me to look up masculine messenger bags or something#immediately triggering a mocking thought about fragile masculinity#followed by. all of this.#this sucks. I hate it here.#can we fix masculinity so I don't have to be afraid of people misgendering me more for carrying a purse or something#tbh making it alt has allowed me to feel comfortable with stuff like makeup & jewelry bc alt fashion is often tied to gender nonconformity#but for the life of me I can't figure out how to make a purse definitively alt. so I want to look up stupid masculine bags#the thing is I don't *want* a huge backpack! a mid-sized purse type would suit the practical need!#I just will throw up if people see me carrying a purse and form any sort of association with nonmasculinity because of it!! fuck!!!#x: axel talks#I'm sorry y'all I just keep having more and more feelings about this and I have no fucking clue where else to go with it#well I guess I have my queer support group this week actually that might be the perfect place for it#I just. need to excise it sooner than that. I will burst if I have to suppress it much longer
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
life is so hard and i am literally two inches big……
#I’m so tired today#I wish there was a way for me to exist in my field without being constantly exploited#I’m so manic pixie dream girl coded it’s like they can’t even think of me as a human being#just something that generates content for them to use and incorporate into their own projects#fighting against all odds to maintain my life’s thesis…. that a story is first and foremost a companion#these stories were my friends before they were someone else’s meal ticket#I’m just burnt out with people taking advantage of me#I want to nap#but there’s more work to do#chanting to myself over and over: is this the thing you love more than your own ego#can it be that thing?#it must
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
my only qualm about the writers' strike is that I wish it had somehow been able to happen even sooner because AI has exploded in the cultural conversation these past few months, I want it beaten away from creative jobs with sticks, and I'm concerned it's already at the point studios will never come to a good term there and will in fact use this period to up their AI-writing explorations
#everybody's so sure they're not creating Skynet right up until you have Skynet on your hands#with publishing already using AI for cover art#(which - esp in contrast with that cool article about how the og Baby-Sitters' Club covers were oil paintings! - just saddens me)#i have concerns#not about AI outpacing human creativity hell no#but about what our quick-fix culture will use it for#the making of art?? one of the things that makes life meaningful and provides most joy?? this is what we outsource to the machines??#no i want them to do my Excel tasks so I have more time to write this is the opposite!#we are all John Henry#every time someone tells me how ChatGPT is being incorporated in their job#or my one friend sends something she's had it produce or write (and she's in an artist!)#i am sitting here like the clenched teeth emoji#this is going to be a watershed cultural moment anyway#let's go WGA#never give up never surrender
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Most people in the notes of this post: yeah I like having fun and enjoying the things I say bring me enjoyment! Alright!
Others: I can’t believe you’d like to LIKE this franchise we both claim to love. Personally offensive. Also canon is real but don’t fucking ask me what it is. The only thing that matters is that it’s important.
Me: Canon is only real in the highly unlikely scenario that I track down Todd Howard and convince him that he can make Fallout 5 universally well received if only he makes Arthur Maxson/John Hancock an important and unskippable story element, in which case this post is formally retracted and never happened due to a word of god retcon, and you’ll have to accept it because canon was real all along.
“Fallout TV show retconned New Vegas-“
Stop. Listen to me. Look me in the eyes. “Canon” isn’t real. I’m completely serious. It’s whatever you want it to be. This franchise is rooted in games where you literally choose what ending you want based on your actions. Please, please for the love of god tell me that this whole time some of you have not been deciding that in games with multiple endings there is actually one “real” ending and all the others are “not canon.” If you really want my opinion half the fun of this whole series is that EVERY SEQUENCE OF EVENTS IS EQUALLY “VALID.” It’s time to kill the Todd Howard in your head and realize that literally no one is stopping you from choosing what to believe is part of this series. Incorporate every game, including the ones that never got made and only exist as details on the wiki. Or don’t. Decide that only the first two games and New Vegas are real and pretend 3 & 4 don’t exist. Create a new timeline in your head where EVERYTHING happens BUT Fallout 3 and yet Fallout 4 still fucking happens. Incorporate the fan theories you like and disregard the ones you don’t. Add your headcanons. Just MAKE SHIT UP. It doesn’t fucking matter! And that’s beautiful!!!! War never changes but goddamn canon sure will, but only if you believe!!
#I’m clearly using a bit of hyperbole here in jest#but also I’m fascinated and flattered that a lot of people seem to agree with this post#and I know that if people want to find reasons to hate the show they would have shown up with shovels to dig for something regardless#even if the show had been ‘slice-of-life NCR series where Fallout 3 & 4 are just the elaborate DnD campaign the rangers play biweekly’#an idea which I of course will readily incorporate into the Fallout multiverse in my head
3K notes
·
View notes
Text
THIS FIC BY @hetaari IS SO GOOD.
#aph#hetalia#hws#fruk#aph england#aph france#hws england#hws france#I love it so damn much. Uagh. And also as someone who loves to describe England as someone who'd cut his heart out.#Him watching France's beat is so ... Like nationverse Arthur is a little less afraid of feelings but it still holds.#To see something so alive and loving and beautiful to see the anthithesis to how you life your life ...#course he wants to crawl into that ribcage#I think it can have my incorporation tag due to that desire#cause dying on your lips is how i wanna go
0 notes
Text
biblically accurate, semi-realistic candace or kandake, who was a nubian queen
image renders:
Incoming yap about the current genshin problem:
As a Chinese person swarmed by western media, Liyue means so, so much to me. Seeing the culture that I've been taught to be ashamed of all my life being represented so accurately and positively makes me incredibly happy. It was the first time I saw the famous landscapes that I've visited in person and recreated a fantasy game. Seeing characters wear clothes with similar designs to what I’ve worn and eating similar foods to what I’ve eaten, is indescribable. The euphoria I felt when I first climbed atop of Qingyun Peak and heard the music is something I wish I could experience again.
That being said, Sumeru was a mess, and Natlan is just depressing. What I would give to have people from SEA/SWANA, Latin America, Africa, and Indigenous groups etc. to feel the same way I did when strolling through Liyue.
HYV’s colorism isn’t just stifling their character designs; by whitewashing real-life people, real cultures and even their deities, they are inadvertently whitewashing history. They are taking from actual ethnic groups: learning their history and struggles, then retelling these narratives after replacing their people with bleached protagonists in orientalist clothing.
All this because of what? Out of touch beauty standards? The possibility of lower sales? Dehya is extremely loved in China and her fans donated thousands to a children’s charity in her name. Other Chinese companies like Lilith Games and Bluepoch don’t have this problem. Dislyte is able to consistently pump out gorgeous character designs with varying skin tones and Reverse:1999 makes accurate designs and does in-depth research into the cultures of their characters.
It’s a basic lack of respect.
I've heard that Iranian players were extremely happy and touched by their representation, and that's amazing. And most European, Chinese, and Japanese players are fine with theirs. I just wish this extended to the representation of people with skin tones that are darker.
HYV has shown that they are capable of making characters with darker skin tones and interesting designs, but they will only do that for npcs and enemies. Orientalism, culture mash-ups and inaccuracies across regions is unfortunately common in the game, but the problem with the unchanging pale color of playable characters reflects an obvious and sinister bigotry. I do personally believe that a lot of this has to do with the meddling of higher-ups; many playable characters look like they’ve been white-washed at the end of the process, and just from an art/design standpoint, they fit darker skin-tones much, much better.
It is impossible for Genshin to be a fully “fictional fantasy game” because they chose to bear the responsibility of incorporating real life cultures into their world-building. The criticisms about Sumeru and Natlan are what they brought upon themselves. If you don’t want to represent properly, don’t do it at all. You cannot take everything from a culture and leave their people out of it. They deserve the same respect and research as the region representing your own nation.
For the people who have seen themselves represented in media over and over again, or for those who do not care about being represented at all: even if YOU don't care, others do, and they have a damn good reason for it. This is a big deal, it isn’t too much to ask for, and I will be blocking racists. Peace.
#art#fanart#genshinimpact#genshinimpactfanart#digital art#lilliangst art#natlan#candace#3d#3d modeling#3d sculpting#3d art#3d model#blender sculpt#blender#blender 3d#nomad#nomad sculpt#candace genshin#kandake#digital sculpture#candace fanart#my art#sumeru
1K notes
·
View notes