#this is so long wtf 4k words!!

[etoilesombre]

Hey, do you guys want to hear a story? Let me tell you about the romance between Lancelot and Guinevere, as recounted in Sir Thomas Malory's Le Morte d'Arthur.

So, I thought I knew the basics. I grew up reading modern versions of Arthurian legend that focused on other aspects, but had a general knowledge of the Arthur-Guinever-Lancelot love triangle. It didn't show up too much, but I assumed it was subtext in some other versions. What I picked up was that it was sort of pure, almost an ot3, and not the cause of a lot of problems. 

My friends. In this version it is NOT SUBTEXT, it DEFINITELY CAUSED PROBLEMS, and it is WILD. It is a true will-they-won't-they drama fest soap opera romance, and I need to share. So please, come on this journey with me.

[I’m looking at you, Black Sails fandom people. I need you to know that Flint canonically would have read this. He would almost certainly have also grown up hearing these stories. I’m not saying he’s Lancelot coded, but I am saying it's interesting that he would have been aware that was something it was possible to be.]

A couple notes, before we dive in. I am very much just summarizing what happened in the book. The thing is, the book is a million pages long and also in Middle English, and this is just one of many plots, which I think is why it's not more widely known. I will show some excerpts so you can get a feel for the text, but you don’t need to read them to understand the story. I'm referring to a version that is as close to the manuscript as I can find, though with spelling regularized. For real fun, see what the original looked like. Malory purports to be translating part of the French Vulgate cycle, which likely is where the character of Lancelot originates, but in fact he is doing much more than translating, and compiles other stories as well. Point being, when he says “so the French book sayeth” etc, that is the “book” to which he is referring. Because of my lack of knowledge about the language and cultural context, this lecture series from Mythgard Academy was absolutely invaluable to my understanding. I cannot recommend it highly enough. Inevitably, some of the opinions of the prof are reflected here. I do not have it in me to compare the scholarship of various medievalists right now, I just want to tell you about this DRAMA. 

Let’s start with a prophecy. When Arthur decides he wishes to marry Guinevere, Merlin advises him to take someone else, because if he takes her, she will betray him with Lancelot and it will destroy his kingdom. All of this is foretold, not only to us, but to Arthur himself. Of course he takes her anyway, and all is doomed from the start.

As we begin the main arc of this story (several books after the prophecy), Lancelot is widely acknowledged to be the best and most renowned knight of Arthur’s court. He is plainly and hopelessly in love with Guinevere, and she loves him in return. Arthur doesn’t have a problem with this - who wouldn’t love Guinevere? This sort of love is socially acceptable, so long as they do not sleep together, which would be treason. Arthur in fact seems to support their love, because it means that Lancelot will be Guinevere’s champion should she need one. This is a role Arthur himself legally cannot fill because he is the king, and so would have to be the judge. Lancelot is indeed a good champion for her, and fights for her when she is wrongly accused of murder. 

Lancelot is deeply chivalrous, in a way that seems sincere. This is a great place for a first excerpt, a conversation with a Random Damsel Lancelot has been helping:

‘Now, damosel,’ said Sir Lancelot, ‘will ye any more service of me?’ ‘Nay, sir,’ she said, ‘at this time, but almighty Jesu preserve you wheresoever ye ride or go, for the most courteous knight thou art and meekest unto all ladies and gentlewomen that now liveth. But one thing, sir knight, me thinks ye lack, ye that are a knight wifeless, that ye will not love some maiden or gentlewoman. For I could never hear say that ever ye loved any of no manner of degree, and that is great pity. But it is noised that ye love Queen Guenivere, and that she hath ordained by enchantment that ye shall never love no other but her, nor no other damosel nor lady shall rejoice you; wherefore there be many in this land of high estate and low that make great sorrow.’ ‘Fair damosel,’ said Sir Lancelot, ‘I may not warn* people to speak of me what it pleaseth them; but for to be a wedded man, I think it not; for then I must couch with her, and leave arms and tournaments, battles and adventures. And as for to say to take my pleasance with paramours, that will I refuse, in principal for dread of God. For knights that be adventurous should not be adulterers nor lecherous, for then they be not happy nor fortunate unto the wars; for either they shall be overcome with a simpler knight than they be themselves, or else they shall slay by unhap and their cursedness better men than they be themselves. And so who that useth paramours shall be unhappy, and all thing unhappy that is about them.’ 

So after doing his Knightly Deeds for this damsel, Lancelot asks if she needs anything else. She says no, but you are lacking one thing, which is the love of a woman. It is rumored that is because Guinevere has through sorcery made you love only her, and that causes all of the women great sorrow. In reply Lancelot makes this speech about how he cannot have a wife or paramour and be a good knight, but everyone thinks it is at least in part because his love is reserved for Guinevere.

Now, throughout the book his chastity DOES notably cause all of the women great sorrow. Everyone wants to sleep with Lancelot. Literally he is kidnapped by the four most beautiful queens other than Guinevere, and they say he has to choose one of them as a lover (not even a wife, a lover) or else die. He says he would rather die, though in the end he escapes. This is just an example, truly it is a recurring problem for him. He is, at one point, tricked into sleeping with a woman with whom he conceives his son Galahad (as was prophesied, it's a long story and the romance is only part of it. It is worth mentioning that something similar happens to Arthur, which is how Mordred is sired.) When Guinevere learns that Lancelot has been with someone else, she is angry and banishes him from the court. They still love each other and eventually reconcile. 

So, Lancelot goes on the quest for the holy grail. But he fails, specifically because while he is outwardly dedicated to God, in his private heart he is still dedicated to Guinevere. And so he makes a vow to renounce his love for her, acknowledging that it is beyond measure (beyond what is right, even if they have not technically done anything wrong.) However when he returns to Camelot, he cannot keep this vow, as we see. 

Then, as the book saith, Sir Lancelot began to resort unto Queen Guenivere again, and forgot the promise and the perfection that he made in the quest. For, as the book saith, had not Sir Lancelot been in his privy thoughts and in his mind so set inwardly to the Queen as he was in seeming outward to God, there had no knight passed him in the quest of the Sangrail, but ever his thoughts were privily on the Queen. And so they loved together more hotter than they did beforehand, and had many such privy draughts together that many in the court spoke of it, and in especial Sir Agravain, Sir Gawain’s brother, for he was ever open-mouthed. So it befell that Sir Lancelot had many resorts of ladies and damosels that daily resorted unto him to be their champion: in all such matters of right Sir Lancelot applied him daily to do for the pleasure of Our Lord Jesu Christ. And ever as much as he might he withdrew him from the company of Queen Guenivere for to eschew the slander and noise, wherefore the Queen waxed wroth with Sir Lancelot.

He and Guinevere start spending a lot of time alone together, and so there are rumors circulating about them in court. In order to put a stop to the rumors, Lancelot starts paying other women attention and doing more good knightly deeds for them. Guinevere is terribly jealous, but he tells her it's for their own good, and also tells her about the vow he made, and his concern that their love is beyond what is appropriate. She is devastated, and weeping banishes him from the court (again). 

Lancelot then rides in a tournament, disguised. (Why? Because this is simply a thing knights do.) To make it an effective disguise he takes the token of a woman, the sleeve of the fair maid of Astolat to wear on his helm. When she discovers that he was only using it for the disguise, and he does not indeed love her, she is so heartbroken that she says if he will not marry her or be her lover, she will die. He refuses, on the grounds that love must not be constrained and should arise from the heart, and offers her a thousand pounds a year instead if she marries anyone else. Properly insulted by this, she does indeed die. She has her body sent in a boat to Camelot, with a letter in her hand, saying that she died of her love for him, that he would not return. 

Seeing this, Guinevere reconciles with Lancelot, presumably reassured by the fact that he would let this very beautiful much younger woman die of her love rather than being with her. She insists that from now on he will not fight in disguise, and will openly bear her token. 

Then Queen Guenivere sent for Sir Lancelot, and said thus: ‘I warn you that ye ride no more in no jousts nor tournaments but that your kinsmen may know you; and at these jousts that shall be ye shall have of me a sleeve of gold. And I pray you for my sake to force* yourself there, that men may speak you worship. But I charge you as ye will have my love, that ye warn your kinsmen that ye will bear that day the sleeve of gold upon your helmet.’ ‘Madam,’ said Sir Lancelot, ‘it shall be done.’ And either made great joy of other.

It is important to keep in mind that, to this point, there is no textual evidence that they were sleeping together, and a great deal of evidence that it was important to Lancelot that they not cross that line. There is much less evidence that this is important to Guinevere.

So then one fateful day in May, Guinevere goes picnicing with an entourage of knights. They are captured by someone else who is in love with Guinevere, and taken back to his castle, but she manages to send a message to Lancelot. At the castle, she insists that her knights sleep in her bedchamber on the grounds that they were wounded in the battle when she was captured and need tending, but truly she wants them there to keep her captor from raping her. 

Lancelot arrives to rescue her, and the person who kidnapped her agrees to give her back in the morning. She tells Lancelot to visit her room in the night. He climbs up to her window, which is barred. They have a heartfelt reunion and she says she wishes he could come in to her. He acquiesces and breaks the bars to get into her room, cutting his hand to the bone to do so. Despite the profusely bleeding wound and the ten other men sleeping in the room, they at last do sleep together, in this passionate blood covered consummation. He sneaks back out and replaces the bars.

In the morning, the man who kidnapped Guinevere comes in and sees blood all over the bed. He accuses her of being unfaithful to the king, saying she lay with one of the knights who had been sleeping in her room. She denies it, but it is very clear that she did sleep with someone who was bleeding. 

Lancelot says he will fight to defend her from this accusation, which is right and proper because he is her champion. In this story people take trial by combat and oaths before God very seriously, especially Lancelot. He really does try. So he swears an oath that he will prove with his life that Guinevere did not sleep with one of the wounded knights who lay in her room. This of course is TRUE, but only on a technicality. Lancelot, having slept with her himself the night before, is also the one who defends her honor after. I love this story so much. 

Instead of fighting him, the kidnapper takes Lancelot captive. In captivity he encounters ANOTHER damsel who insists that sleep with her in order for her to help him. He refuses, still faithful in his heart to Guinevere. Eventually she settles for him holding and kissing her, which is not across the line of appropriateness apparently, giving us some idea of where that line is drawn. Anyway, Lancelot gets out, fights for Guinevere and wins. There are indications that he feels like he barely dodged a devine bullet. 

Guinevere and Lancelot return to Camelot. Finally the rumors about them are true, the deed has been done, but of course nothing appears particularly different as there were already rumors about them. Two knights, Mordred and Agravaine, who have been intriguing against Arthur already, go and tell Arthur that Guinevere is being untrue to him. Here is his response: 

‘If it be so,’ said the King, ‘wit you well, he is none other; but I would be loath to begin such a thing but I might have proofs of it. For Sir Lancelot is a hardy knight, and all ye know that he is the best knight among us all; and but if he be taken with the deed he will fight with him that bringeth up the noise, and I know no knight that is able to match him. Therefore, and it be sooth as ye say, I would that he were taken with the deed.’ For as the French book saith, the King was full loath that such a noise should be upon Sir Lancelot and his queen. For the King had a deeming of it; but he would not hear thereof, for Sir Lancelot had done so much for him and for the Queen so many times that, wit you well, the King loved him passingly well.

Arthur says he will not hear of this without proof, because if Lancelot is accused and allowed to fight he would beat anyone. And, it is said that Arthur had some idea of the affair, but would not credit it because Lancelot had done so much for him and Guinevere, and he loved Lancelot greatly. 

So, one night when the king is away hunting, the two accusers contrive to catch them in the act, with a group of twelve armed knights. They do find Lancelot in Guinevere’s chamber, but the text is notably, pointedly vague about whether they are actually in bed. In any case, Lancelot asks for a trial. The knights say no, they have caught him and so may kill him. He is Lancelot, so he kills all of them instead, save one (Mordred) whom he leaves wounded. Lancelot flees, intending to return to rescue Guinevere and take her to his own castle to protect her from Arthur’s wrath. He maintains her innocence, and still intends that they will all reconcile.

Guinevere is to be burned at the stake (normal in this situation). Lancelot rescues her from the burning at the last moment, killing a number of knights of the round table. Arthur seems to blame the accusers more than Guinevere and Lancelot (for good reason; keep in mind that the romance is a subplot, there is a great deal of political intrigue going on.) Now a war will begin, whether anyone wants it or not, because of the people Lancelot killed. Lancelot takes Guinevere to his own castle. Battle lines are drawn, and Lancelot and Arthur confront each other in the fighting:

And ever was King Arthur about Sir Lancelot to have slain him, and ever Sir Lancelot suffered him and would not strike again. So Sir Bors encountered with King Arthur; and Sir Bors smote him, and so he alit and drew his sword and said to Sir Lancelot, ‘Sir, shall I make an end of this war?’—for he meant to have slain him. ‘Not so hardy,’ said Sir Lancelot, ‘upon pain of thy head, that thou touch him no more! For I will never see that most noble king that made me knight neither slain nor shamed.’ And therewith Sir Lancelot alit off his horse and took up the King and horsed him again, and said thus: ‘My lord the king, for God’s love, stint this strife, for ye get here no worship and I would do my utterance. But always I forbear you, and ye nor none of yours forbear not me. And therefore, my lord, I pray you remember what I have done in many places, and now am I evil rewarded.’ So when King Arthur was on horseback he looked on Sir Lancelot; then the tears burst out of his eyes, thinking of the great courtesy that was in Sir Lancelot more than in any other man. And therewith the King rode his way and might no longer behold him, saying to himself, ‘Alas, alas, that yet this war began!’

So Arthur tries to slay Lancelot, but Lancelot, the better fighter, refuses to slay him and indeed when Arthur is unhorsed Lancelot forbids that he be slain, and gives him his own horse. Arthur weeps for the honor that is in Lancelot, and laments that the war began. 

The pope intervenes and tries to negotiate an end. Lancelot confirms that he is willing to return Guinevere to Arthur, and says he has always been willing to do this and will still defend her honor, but that he does not feel he can do so because Arthur has listened to liars and been misled, and he had more reason to take her away than the accusation of adultery - he does not trust she can be safe in that court, with things as they are. 

Eventually they do make a deal, with some assurances, and he surrenders Guinevere to the king. He kisses her openly, says that he will leave, but should she be in danger or ever again accused of being untrue, he will fight for her as he always has. He departs the court forever, to much great sorrow, and returns to his own lands. 

The war continues - eventually Mordred seizes the throne, Arthur kills him in battle but is mortally wounded himself and passes to Avalon. Following the king’s death, although her love would no longer be adulterous, Guinevere retires to a convent rather than reuniting with Lancelot. He seeks her out, and this is her reaction: 

Sir Lancelot was brought before her; then the Queen said to all those ladies, ‘Through this same man and me hath all this war been wrought, and the death of the most noblest knights of the world; for through our love that we have loved together is my most noble lord slain. Therefore, Sir Lancelot, wit thou well I am set in such a plight to get my soul health; and yet I trust through God’s grace and through His Passion of His wounds wide, that after my death I may have a sight of the blessed face of Christ Jesu, and at Doomsday to sit on His right side;* for as sinful as ever I was, now are saints in heaven. And therefore, Sir Lancelot, I require thee and beseech thee heartily, for all the love that ever was betwixt us, that thou never see me no more in the visage. And I command thee, on God’s behalf, that thou forsake my company; and to thy kingdom look thou turn again, and keep well thy realm from war and wrack. For as well as I have loved thee heretofore, my heart will not serve now to see thee, for through thee and me is the flower of kings and knights destroyed. And therefore go thou to thy realm, and there take ye a wife and live with her with joy and bliss. And I pray thee heartily to pray for me to the everlasting Lord that I may amend my misliving.’ ‘Now, my sweet madam,’ said Sir Lancelot, ‘would ye that I should turn again unto my country, and there to wed a lady? Nay, madam, wit you well, that shall I never do, for I shall never be so false unto you of that I have promised. But the self* destiny that ye have taken you to, I will take me to, for the pleasure of Jesu; and ever for you I cast me specially to pray.

Rather than rejoicing in Lancelot’s presence, Guinevere laments that their love brought about the downfall of the Arthurian court, and the deaths of the knights of the round table and King Arthur. She calls upon Lancelot, by all the love that was ever between them to leave her presence, telling him to marry someone else if he wishes and see her no more. Lancelot replies that he wants no one else, and that he will respect her wishes, but will also renounce the world and join a religious order. He asks Guinevere for a final parting kiss, which she denies him. 

When Guinevere lies dying of illness, Lancelot sets out to go to her, having had a vision. She knows of his coming, and prays to die before she sees him, because she cannot bear it. She dies a half hour before he arrives, leaving instruction that he is to tend to her body, and then lay it to rest beside that of her lord King Arthur. Lancelot does this with great sorrow, and after ceases to eat or drink, and within weeks is dead himself. 

And there you have it, the love affair that doomed Camelot.

HUGE DISCLAIMER: Any and all mistakes or misinterpretations are my own. This is what I gathered, but I am not a medievalist. I am barely an interested layperson. I’m just a random fic writer who got obsessed with research for a story, and had to share this tragic mess. 

[thiefbird]

im almost up to 3k words already for the next chapter of thy heart torments. i have only written the leadup to what i wanted this chapter to be and i already pared down a LOT of what id originally written. why am i so goddamn verbose when writing for aubreyad

[aethon-recs]

This Week (x2) in Tomarrymort (25 October – 7 November 2024)

Hello again! We have two multi-chaptered fics finishing this week, highlighted below, as well as a bunch of delicious one-shots and chapter updates as always.

Completed Fic:

Sits the wind in that quarter by @mosiva (M, 61k, complete) “After something of a long absence, Lord Riddle, the Earl of Gaunt, had returned to London.” This is a really cool Regency and Omegaverse AU (how cool is that to see that combined??) that features a lot of courting, gossip and intrigue, social climbing, and Alpha Tom Riddle along with Beta Harry Potter.  Broken Tomarrymort Telephone: Collected Stories by @exquisite-tomarrymort-telephone (E, 109k, complete)  A Tomarrymort version of the Broken Telephone game — passing a whispered word or phrase around a circle, with it often evolving into something quite different as it goes from person to person. “In our version, the starting person received a secret prompt and wrote a fic based on it. They then created a prompt for the next person by summing up what they had written in a single sentence -- with the caveat that their prompt couldn't use the same words as the prompt they were given. This continued through twenty-six (26!) different authors and artists, each adding their own flair and creativity to the exercise. Which brings us to now! We're wrapping up the creation part, so it's time to start sharing it with the world. We hope you enjoy what we've created -- we certainly enjoyed making it.”

In addition, a recap of the author notes from last week. (Please feel free to add some extra context to your fic update in the reblog, such as a little bit about the chapter(s) updated, and I’ll throw it in the update for next week!)

every step i choose to take begins to set the world aflame by @boyneptunee (NR, 4k, WIP) “Tom Riddle wants to become immortal. He will do whatever it takes to achieve it. It gets him in the most interesting situations. (A Phoenix saves his life. The Phoenix is not a Phoenix.)” These Fragments We've Shored by @rowena-rain (M, 31k, WIP) “You call me here because you crave atonement, and only I can give you that. After all, I am the only other who knows what it means to tear one’s soul. Or, as one very astute commenter put it, "Enter Voldemort, the World's Worst Therapist!" (Sorry in advance - Voldemort basically wrote this chapter lol)” Touch of Death by @moontearpensfic (E, 6k, WIP) “An oviposition AU, where Eldritch Harry/Death gives Tom his eggs, which will protect Tom from, well, death. In chapter two, the eggs hatch.” Time Stumbler by @wintumnly (T, 96k, WIP) “One part of my slowburn Harry-raises-Tom series. It ends in Tomarry, but everything building up to that point is unhinged humor, not-good-at-feelings fluff, and angsty plot surrounding Harry and Tom's chaotic and ever growing affections for one another. Update 23 explores Unconditional Love, and there will be familial love, friendship love, flirtatious love, obsessive love and others in future parts.”

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Tomarrymort One Shots and Completed Fic

Chapters 26 and 27 (Completed) of Sits the wind in that quarter by @mosiva

Chapters 1 through 27 (Completed) of Broken Tomarrymort Telephone: Collected Stories by @exquisite-tomarrymort-telephone

One Shot | Resonating Souls by @endlessburningdarkness

One Shot | Anabiosis by @lee-bella

One Shot | Bites and other Surprises by lemonchase

One Shot | Viticula by @crowcrowcrowthing @cindle-writes

One Shot | Speedrunning Danger by @i-dream-of-libraries

One Shot | Karma’s a bitch by @albondiguilla007

One Shot | It's Like This by @twopenguinsinabox

One Shot | Boulder On by @lumosatnight

One Shot | WTF, Potter?! by @dragonaireabsolvare

One Shot | a couple inches shorter by @2sidesofthesamesoul

One Shot | bloody money by @00queasy00

One Shot | Cerulean blue by @albondiguilla007

One Shot | It's Not Always What It Seems by dysproporsium 

One Shot | To be Entwined by @cyandenial

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Tomarrymort Ongoing Fics

Chapter 6 of And the Living Will Envy the Dead by @k-s-morgan

Chapter 18 of A Simple Request by @shyinsunlight

Chapters 3 through 6 of in the silence by @satflesk22

Chapter 7 of Anytime, Anywhere, Always by @moontearpensfic

Chapters 15 and 16 of the stars, my destination by @milkandmoon-ao3

Chapter 11 of Ills of Murder by @shadow-of-the-eclipse

Chapter 2 of In My Lover's Room (i am free) by @hyalithium

Chapters 1 through 5 of To the Hilt by @izharmilgram

Chapter 10 of Strings of Fate by @dizzydreamer

Chapters 2 and 3 of If I were you by @onehitpleb

Chapter 25 of would that i'd loved (long ago) by @sprst1tion

Chapter 18 of with eyes like these (who sees anybody else) by @cealesti

Chapter 9 of 7 by @moontearpensfic

Chapters 3 and 4 of you speak of the devil (like he's not your friend) by @amuria

Chapter 24 of Time Stumbler by @wintumnly

Chapter 20 of Outrunning the Villain in You by @zenyteehee

Chapter 19 of Of Darkness and Luminescence by @mindchroniclesandbrainfluff

Chapters 6 and 7 of Memories of a Killer by @chemfreakwriting

Chapter 1 of ROOTED by @inhumanbby

Chapter 1 of baby, turn the bright lights on by @ictyn

Chapter 1 of Harry's No Good, Very Bad Day by @2sidesofthesamesoul

Chapter 15 of Double-Aspect Paradox by TimaeusKosmou

Chapter 15 of Saint Harry by @alenablack @chaos-bear

Chapter 7 of Fetters of the Damned by @sc0rpiflow3r

Chapters 131 and 132 of Liquida Tenebris (Remastered) by @dymis

Chapter 1 of Wish by @sri-verse

Chapter 10 of flour power by Kozzie

Chapter 5 of What quickens me is the violence in thee by @i-dream-of-libraries

Chapter 20 of Occultation by TimaeusKosmou

Chapters 21 and 22 of Learning to love by @l-archiduchesse

Chapters 1 and 2 of The Serpent and the Stag by @green-like-the-sky

Chapter 2 of Fake Boyfriend by J0305

Chapter 7 of i am anonymous, you are a concrete wall by Pensievable

Chapter 8  of we made universes out of bitten lips and broken hands by @boyneptunee

Chapter 8 of Lesmosyne by TimaeusKosmou

Chapter 2 of Your Wish, My Command by @moontearpensfic

Chapters 6 and 7 of Venom or Valor by @lightningant

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[wangxianficfinder]

In the mood for...

Oct 8th

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1. Hello! Thank you for being doing this, I find so many things I haven't read! Today, I'm in the mood for any fic where WWX is really shy only around LWJ, like, incredibly nervous, and they end up together eventually, maybe one where LWJ is the one who flirts, subtly, in his way and WWX loses his mind over it 😂 @ghostwolf-93

loveliness by orphan_account (T, 1k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Love Confessions, First Kiss, Pining, Teen Romance, Getting Together)

Back up and dream again by The Silverfish (ZephyrAndTheSilverfish) (T, 3k, WangXian, Fix-It, Time Travel, Fluff, Flirting, Cute, Embarrassed WWX)

🧡 Stunted, Starving Juvenility by TomatenMark (E, 828k, WangXian, WIP, Fix-it of sorts, Talisman master WWX, Not JFM Friendly, Study Arc, Getting together, Fluff and Angst, Engagement) The first few chapters of Stunted, Starving Juvenility () feature a flustered Wei Ying after he realizes he's attracted to Lan Zhan which is close to the request but maybe not quite what they were after.

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2. I am in the mood for a fic with dark Jiang Cheng (maybe even demonic cultivator Cheng) and some Jiang Cheng/Wei Wuxian pairing. It could be alternate universe where they didn't grow up like siblings and I would like some arranged marriage between them. It doesn't have to come through and the endgame can be different pairing. I am curious if there is such fic out there.

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3. hello and thank you so much for what you do!!! I just read "although my mind is young, it is not gentle" by everythingispoetry and I was hoping you could recommend me something similar? Something centered around Lan Sizhui and showing his relationship with Lan Wangji and/or Wei Wuxian. Could be him growing up pre-canon or during canon , idc. @ladyhavilliard

let the yoke fall from our shoulders by occultings (microcomets) (G, LSZ & LWJ, LSZ & WWX, wangxian, LWJ & LSZ & WWX, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Character Study, Mentions of Canonical Character Death, Grief/Mourning, Gusu Lan Juniors Dynamics, let capricorns cathart agenda, Happy Ending, Family Feels, Established Relationship)

🔒 Not Yet (There As Needed) by sunrise_and_death (T, 13k, LSZ & WWX, JL & WWX, JL & LSZ, WangXian, Post-Canon, Family Feels, Family Bonding, POV LSZ, This Fic Has Everything, even more yearning, WWX & LSZ figuring out wtf their relationship is, Dramatic Revelations)

Important Distinctions by nagi_blue (T, 5k, gen, Fluff and Crack, [Podfic] Important Distinctions by semperfiona_podfic (semperfiona)

your name, safe in their mouth by astrolesbian (G, 10k, LSZ & WWX, WangXian, Father-Son Relationship, Injury, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Canon, More aligned with CQL than novel canon, Miscommunication, Eventual Positive Communication, Trying to be a family, how to tell your dad you want him to be your dad in 6 easy steps!)

Gathered Herbs & Sweet Grasses by hansbekhart (Not Rated, 19k, LSZ & LWJ, WangXian, dad wangji, LWJ’s Questionable Parenting Skills, Grief/Mourning, Recovery, Injury Recovery, Hopeful Ending, Canon-Typical Violence, Gathered Herbs & Sweet Grasses [podfic] by someplacelikebolivia)

Inquiry by incendir (G, 10k, LSZ & LWJ, WangXian)

to the act of making noise by words-writ-in-starlight (WordsWritInStarlight) (G, 19k, LSZ & LWJ, LSZ & WWX, WangXian, Grief/Mourning, Father-Son Relationship, inquiry, LSZ is the best of boys and I will not hear debate, Music, Angst, Fluff and Angst, Found Family, [Podfic] to the act of making noise by Ceewelsh, flamingwell, kisahawklin, Rionaa) This is basically Lan Yuan growing up with Inquiry as a lullaby (and seeing LWJs grief through his eyes) I'm not familiar with the fic mentioned in the ask, but this fic focuses on LSZ growing up. Tissue alert! And double tissue alert for the podfic version

to recollect and long for by mme_anxious (T, 4k, LSZ & LWJ, LXC & LWJ, WangXian, Angst, Humor, Fluff, weird mix of book and live action, Forehead Ribbons, Family Feels, Weddings, Sort Of, POV Multiple)

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4. HII! Can you please find some zombie au's with wangxian? Ty!

The Edge of Night by Hobbsy3 (M, 277k, WangXian, XuanLi, Modern AU, Zombie Apocalypse, Yúnmèng Siblings Dynamics, Accidental Baby Acquisition During a Zombie Apocalypse, Junior Quartet, (except they’re all babies), Angst with a Happy Ending, Minor Character Death, Hurt/Comfort, Blood and Gore, Ensemble Cast, Worst Zombie Fighting Team Ever, Found Family) Amazing Zombie AU

When the Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation takes a week off by galaxy_in_your_eyes (T, 20k, WangXian, Modern Cultivation, Canon Divergence, Everyone Lives, only those that deserve it, kind of fix-it, Zombie Apocalypse, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Attempt at Humor, POV Alternating, Canon-Typical Violence, Blood and Gore, Mentions of Suicidal Thoughts, Brief Mentions of Cannibalism, Zombies, We don’t see the Zombie Apocalypse, It happens behind closed doors, WWX in quarantine, Wangxian being Wangxian, Mentions of Smut, Established Relationship, Courtesy Names, local necromancer gets sick with the flu)

Darkness Before the Dawn by Selenay (E, 64k, wangxian, Zombie Apocalypse, Modern With Magic, Necromancer WWX, Reunions, toddler A-Yuan, There Was Only One Bed, There are zombies but not graphically horrific zombies, Angst with a Happy Ending, Find a home in the middle of an apocalpyse)

when the sun goes out by travelingneuritis (E, 176k, WangXian, Modern Cultivation, tech cultivation, Necromancy, Angst with a Happy Ending, insecurity around adoption, Dad!WWX, dad!lwj, Grief/Mourning, Mistaken Identity, Mood Whiplash, Body Swap, sex tears!, Falling In Love, Consensual Somnophilia, apocalypse (localized), Smut, unrealistic sexual stamina, Flashbacks, Time Skips, Illustrations)

❤️ A Corpse Called By Name by jaemyun (Not rated, 60k, WangXian, Zombie Apocalypse, Angst, Horror, Zombie WWX, Eventual Happy Ending, yunmeng trio, Eventual WangXian, WWX is dad material even in death, Humor, YLLZ but make him dead, A Corpse Called By Name by jaemyun [Podfic] by Miss Appellation (Lizeth)) WIP podfic / featuring WWX doing the impossible again, being the best big brother, dad and LZ's crush as a consious boss zombie! Beware of some angst tho

a thousand teeth, yours among them by darkredloveknot (enheduane) (E, 10k, WangXian, Zombie Apocalypse, Blood and Violence, Mild Gore, Hook-Up, Falling In Love, metaphysical sexual body horror (??), Non-Sexual Intimacy, Melancholy)

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5. hello! i would love recs for mpreg fics set in canon/post-canon that are NOT a/b/o.

🧡Accidents Will Happen by vesna (mrsronweasley) (E, 45k WangXian, Post Canon, Mpreg, Fluff, Light angst, Mojo's post)

Bloom where you are planted by luckymoonly (M, 44k wangxian, MM/WQ, Canon Divergence, Fix It, courting, Mpreg, Sunshot Campaign, Fluff, Happy Ending, getting together early, Romance, WWX giving birth in the middle of the war? Most likely than you think!, Yúnmèng Siblings Feels, Smut, Drama, Blood and Violence, Minor Character Death, There Is Only One Bed, No Fall of Lotus Pier, Crossdressing, Shotgun Wedding, Mention of miscarriage (not WWX), wangxian Have a Breeding Kink, Giving Birth, Soft granduncle LQR)

Blooming in white by luckymoonly (T, 38k, wangxian, JYL/JZX, MM/WQ, NMJ/LXC, NHS/JC, Canon Divergence, Mpreg, Getting Together, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, hidden pregnancy, Mutual Pining, Drama, Misunderstandings, Everyone Lives AU, Miscommunication, WWX and NHS are BFF, matchmaker NHS, Fix-It)

Impermanence, Transience, Permanence by Best Bepsy (BepsyGray) (E, 39k, wangxian, canon divergence, unplanned pregnancy, mpreg, gore, sunshot campaign, assumed miscarriage, medical procedures, childbirth, golden core reveal)

in a river you wade by bleuett (M, 20k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Mpreg, Postpartum Depression, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Good Uncle LQR, Family Feels, Happy Ending, Kid Fic)

Take My Pieces, Make Me Whole by InTheGreySpaces (M, 297k, WangXian, NieLan, ChengQing, XuanLi, Canon Divergence, Angst, Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Hurt WWX, JC & WWX Reconciliation, JC is a good brother, LXC Is A Good Brother, Golden Core Reveal, Mpreg, Yuan really IS WWX's son, and LWJ is his other father, LQR is a good uncle, Eventual Happy Ending, WWX Has Memory Issues, NMJ is a good brother, Hurt LWJ, Hurt NMJ, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, tiny bit of non-con, chapters will be tagged individually with necessary warnings, sentient Yin Iron)

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6. I am in the mood of fic with some body swap trope. I mean like if Lan Zhan swapped his body with Wei (maybe some magic went wrong) and both have to pretend to be who they are not. Or it could be bodyswap with any other character. Lan Zhan and Huaisang or Wei and Mingjue or anyone else. I think there is big potential for great stories in there. No modern aus or gender swap please.

🔒💙 Holding shreds by barisan (T, 5k, WangXian, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, No Sunshot Campaign, Body Swap, Not for sexy shenanigans, Chronic Pain, Hurt WWX, Hurt LWJ, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Abusive YZY, Bad Parent YZY, Bad Parent JFM, Good Uncle LQR, Hurt/Comfort, Medical Inaccuracies, POV WWX, Angst with a Happy Ending, Jiāng Family Bashing, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Getting Together, Smart WWX)

come home to my heart by occultings (microcomets) (M, 29k, WangXian, Bodyswap, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, Canon Divergence, First Time, Getting Together, Confessions, Sharing a Bed, Misunderstandings, and a little bit of hurt/comfort as a treat)

These next two are crossovers with TGCF & the body swaps involve characters from that story:

🔒even across a thousand miles by merryofsoul (T, 10k, WangXian, HuaLian, Bodyswap, Post-Canon, Light Angst, Crossover, POV Alternating)

lost my fear of falling by thefireplanet (E, 30k, WangXian, HuaLian, Bodyswap, YLLZ WWX, WWX-centric, WangXian-centric, Post-Canon, Canon-Typical Violence, Case Fic, Canon-Typical Wangxian Sex Things)

Two Sides of the Same Coin by JiangChengLotus (T, 4k, XiCheng, WangXian, Bodyswap,Humor, Fluff, Bonding, Chaos, Developing Friendships, Misunderstandings)

flux by orphan_account (E, 60k, WangXian, Post-Canon, Canon Continuation, Case Fic, Getting Together, Sharing a Bed, Curses, Bodyswap, Sharing a Body, Psychic Bond, Love Confessions, Light Angst with a Happy Ending, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Sexual Tension, Explicit Sexual Content, Masturbation, Telepathic Sex, Investigations, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Slow Build, Slow Burn) i have to recommend Flux! its a case fic that starts out as bodyswap and eventually leads to sharing a body where they can jump between their two bodies together. its so interesting and i find myself coming to back to it from time to time

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7. ITMF request pls 🙏🏻 there's quite a few reincarnation/time-travel fix-its where either both WWX and LWJ retain their previous memories, or only LWJ but not WWX. Are there any where WWX retains his, but not LWJ? Thank you in advance ♥️♥️

Practical Mythology by metisket (T, 17k, WangXian, Time Travel, YLLZ WWX, myths and legends, apparently the burial mounds has to fix everything itself, zombie farm collective, accidental deities, Families of Choice, WWX has no idea what he’s doing, that’s why he’s doing great) WWX travels back in time & becomes known as a powerful immortal. Baby!LWJ grows up on the myths

Last(?) Loop by PyrrhaIphis (T, 9k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Time Loop, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, before the Cloud Recesses study arc) WWX is in a timeloop, but told from pov of LWJ, who is not in the loop

❤️ And Time Is But a Paper Moon by sami (M, 138k, WangXian, XiChengQing, Time Travel, Fix-It, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Healing, Mental Health Issues, PTSD, Hurt/Comfort, Depression, BAMF WWX, BAMF JC, BAMF LWJ, BAMF JYL, Getting Together) multiple podfics and translations into multiple languages available

Wish me luck by starlight1395 (Not Rated, 164k, WangXian, Fix It, Time Travel, Angst, PTSD, Hurt/Comfort, Flashbacks, Nightmares, Slight fluff, Implied Sexual Content, Lots of tears, canon levels of blood/violence, Minor Character Death, secondary character death, Sibling Bonding, JC curses alot, battle scenes with appropriate levels of violence and blood, semi mild smut, it's emotional and soft smut tho so it's okay, mild Self-harm)

Lay my body down by tawaen (M, 48k, WWX & WQ, WWX & WN, wangxian, WWX & JYL, Canon Divergence, Time Travel, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Eventual WangXian, No Golden Core Transfer, Not Cultivation World Friendly, Canon-Typical Violence, Not JC Friendly, What if WWX saw the first siege of the burial mounds and said Nope to the war, OCs, OC point-of-view for one chapter for plot reasons) has WWX's soul zip back to the moment JC strangled him. The memories are incomplete but I think it still counts?

We’ll Build A Dynasty (one the heavens can’t shake) by One_eyed_God (T, 66k, WangXian, WWX & WQ, WWX & WN, WWX & JYL, canon typical Jiang family dynamics, BAMF WWX, Canon JC Characteristics, POV Outsider, Hurt/Comfort, Pre-Relationship, WWX is a Wen, Sect Leader WWX, Genius WWX, The Casual Intimacy of Hand-Holding, A Love Letter to WWX, Not JC Friendly, Time Travel Fix-It) is one where WWX is the only one to travel, but the story is told from everyone else's POV

two guys r in love thats literally it by victortor (M, 11k, wangxian, Time Travel, the fluffiest thing ive ever written)

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8. Itmf more like " dispersing clouds ". I Just love the wwx in it. He's written soo good there. Especially the aspect of him being a head disciple, the author wrote about it in such a way that he actually felt like a head disciple. That one paragraph about him waking up and going " 5 laps around the pier now. " It was soo hotttt! Helooo?

Everything else in the book was written so perfectly true to every character.

This book comes par with " 12 moons and a fortnight " for me NGL. @constellationdks

Just go forward like you mean it by tawaen (M, 101k, WangXian, WWX & WN &WQ, WWX & JYL, NHS & WWX, Canon Divergence, WWx does not attend the Wen indoctrination, WWX saves Lotus Pier, Inventor WWX, No Golden Core Transfer, Sect Leader JYL, JC Has No Golden Core, Bad Parents JFM & YZY, Not JC Friendly, but he gets a happier ending than canon so don’t look here for bashing) Like in Dispersing Clouds, WWX leaves the Jiang but spends time fixing the defences & interacting with elders & fellow disciples. I definitely feel it has similar vibes to that fic

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9. hi!! im looking for recs where both lwj and wwx time travel to the past (preferably longer and novel canon, but anything works!) thank u!!

Never Again by Hauntcats (T, 67k, WWX & WN & WQ, JC & WWX, wangxian, graphic depictions of violence, major character death, Canon Divergence, Angst, Golden Core Transfer Fix-It, Time Travel Fix-It, Not JC Friendly, Dark, BAMF WWX, mentions of abuse, Not Everyone Dies au, XY doesn’t have a happy ending)

🔒 Here With Me by iamwish (T, 58k, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, wwx turns this into a no war!au, Canon-Typical Violence, Period-Typical Homophobia, Bad Parent YZY, POV WWX, POV LWJ, POV JC, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, WWX Has PTSD, and also depression sometimes, Unreliable Narrator, (all of them))

💖 Regrets by antebunny (G, 37k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, Time Travel, Fix-It, Temporary Character Death, Angst, Explicit Descriptions of Love, and other squishy feelings, Angst with a Happy Ending)

🔒 Ad Oblivione by Baph, HikariNoHimeWriter (M, 70k, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, Temporary Character Death, Canon-Typical Violence, POV Multiple, Hurt/Comfort, Grief/Mourning, Identity Reveal, Golden Core Reveal, Cultivation World Critical, Not JC Friendly, Abusive YZY, Angst with a Happy Ending) Out of the pair of them, initially only WWX remembers, but LWJ regains his memories of the undone timeline over the course of the fic

A Life Without Regrets by naqaashi (M, 163k, WangXian, JFM & WWX, JC & WWX, WRH & WWX, LXC & LWJ, LQR & LWJ, LWJ & NHS, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, Angst and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Crack Treated Seriously, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Murder Husbands, PTSD, BAMF WWX, Cultivation Sect Politics, Genius WWX, Cultivation Theory, Sentient Burial Mounds, Dysfunctional Family, Grief/Mourning, Angry WWX, No Golden Core Transfer, BAMF LWJ, Angry LWJ, One-Braincell WangXian, Idiots in Love, Requited Love, Requited Unrequited Love, Soft WangXian, Married WangXian, Soulmates, Not Cultivation World Friendly, Immortal WWX, Canon-Typical Violence, Not JC Friendly, Not Yunmeng Jiang friendly, not gusu lan friendly, Immortal LWJ)

Family by Quiet_crash (G, 57k, WangXian, XuanLi, Time Travel Fix-It, Grief/Mourning, Loss of Parent(s), Established Relationship)

The Wild Geese’s Tomb by The Feels Whale (miscellea) (T, 66k, WangXian, Time Travel AU, fixit, Temporary Character Death, all women live no women die, LWJ’s canonically intense feelings about everything all the time, WWX’s clinical depression gets treated and blamed on resentful energy, navigating gay marriage in ancient china by utiliizing class snobbery for your own ends, if you’re not sure whose fault anything going on in here is then blaming NHS is probably a good bet, WWX plays ‘summon LWJ’ it’s super effective!, the ‘unexploded cow’ approach to dealing with your enemies) CQL rather than novel canon, but it's too good to not recommend

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10. Itmf: the most comforting and soft fic recs you have!

I want a happy ending and for it to be about Wangxian. I don't care about length, it can be a long, plot filled story, as long as there's plenty of fluff!

I'm talking lots of cuddles, soft kisses, non sexually bathing each other, hair brushing, things like that! Bonus points for the smell of sandalwood relaxing Wei Wuxian, but certainly not required!

Thank you all! @acebookdragon47

Continuation by thefaceofno (T, 13k, WangXian, 3zun if you squint, Canon Continuation, wwx builds a lotus pond in cloud recesses, Hair Brushing, Angst with a Happy Ending, Light Angst, Pining, gay disaster lwj, Post-Canon Fix-It)

call me home and I’ll build you a throne by anaphoricae (E, 51k, WangXian, Post-Canon, Post-CQL, Canon Compliant, Getting Together, Developing Relationship, Self-Indulgent, Gusu Lan Juniors Dynamics, Touch-Starved, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Sexual Intimacy, Lán Juniors Gossiping about Wangxian, Nightmares, Hurt/Comfort, Domestic Fluff, WWX Has a New Golden Core, Farmer WWX, Chief Cultivator LWJ, Mutual Pining, Communication, Quietly Falling Into a Married Life, Light Angst, Wholesome, POV LWJ, POV WWX, LWJ in braids agenda, Sharing a Bed, Semi-Public Sex, Inventor WWX, Jealous WWX)

where the chaos is by darkredloveknot (enheduane) (E, 6k, WangXian, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV) Compliant, Post-Canon Reunions, Love Confessions, First Kiss, First Time, Emotions, WWX is overwhelmed, Domestic Bliss, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Bottom LWJ, Top WWX, Intimacy, Hair Brushing, and more!)

🔒Heart of hearts series by apathyinreverie (M, 40k, WangXian, Dark LWJ, (Ish), Amnesia, WWX gets to be Not Okay after the BM, Hurt WWX, Recovery, Protective LWJ, Possessive LWJ, some definite manipulation, but not everything is as it seems, not nearly as dark as the tags make it sound, Canon Divergence, Golden Core Reveal, Golden Core Transfer Fix-It, Kind Of, Domestic WangXian, Fluff, WWX Goes to Gusu, Possessive WWX, Sunshot Campaign, BAMF WWX, BAMF LWJ, Not Cultivation World Friendly)

We Meet at the Thousandth Step by Admiranda, Rynne (T, 316k, WangXian, CSSR/WCZ, Canon Divergence, No Sunshot Campaign, CSSR & WCZ Live, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Different First Meeting, Night Hunts, Genius WWX, Inventor WWX, Plot, Romance, Drama, Fluff, Strangers to married, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Everyone Lives, Developing Relationship, Minor Violence, Case Fic, Mystery, Flirting, WWX’s Canon-Typical Flower Flirting, Arson, There Was Only One Bed, Getting Together, First Kiss, Meeting the Parents, Resolved Sexual Tension, Resolved Romantic Tension, WWX Is a Good Big Brother, New Relationship Bliss, Chinese Mythology & Folklore, Blood and Injury, Yiling siblings, Married WangXian, Honeymoon, Wangxian’s Baby Fever)

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11. itmf fics where characters have a crush on wei wuxian or fall for his charms?

Cotton Wool by incendir (M, 34k, wangxian, LJY/OMC, JL/LSZ, JC & WWX)

Help, My Dad Is Fucking Someone My Age!! by sweetlolixo (T, 3k, WangXian, LSZ & LWJ, Canon Divergence, Humor, Crack, Fluff, Romance)

Transcend by covalentbonds (not rated, 7k, WIP, WangXian, Post-Canon, Fluff and Humor, Smut, YLLZ WWX is prettiest fight me)

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12. hi! this is for itmf.

can you recommend fics that discuss sizhui’s dislike for jiang cheng? this could be because of his treatment towards wei wuxian or maybe because of his treatment and dislike of the wen remnants. thanks!

on the importance of restraint (or lack thereof) by nixtothou (G, 3k, background WangXian, LSZ & JC, Families of Choice, Light Angst, LZS Needs a Hug, Angry LSZ, i simply think lsz deserves to snap, zhuiling if you squint, Not for jc stans, Post-Canon, Character Study)

Symmetry by Vir_Abelasan (M, 13k, LSZ & WWX, WangXian, One-Sided JC/WWX, One-Sided JC/LSZ, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Canon Divergence, LSZ is raised by WWX, WWX still dies sorry, Revenge, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Dark LSZ, Manipulation, Power Imbalance, Torture, Not JC Friendly, JC’s Canonical 13 Years Murder Spree, BAMF LSZ, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, LSZ Gets to Go Apeshit)

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13. itmf wwx or lwj centric modern setting long fic with some family angst! preferrably not slow burn, no vers please! thank u <3

🧡🔒Truth Will Out (when caught on video) - End_OTW_Racism! by KizuKatana (E, 179k, wangxian, WN & WWX & WQ, graphic depictions of violence, modern cultivation, canon divergence, YZY abuses WWX, caught on camera, partial core removal, WWX kicked out of Jiang sect, livestreamer WWX, meet ugly, dual cultivation, smut, no war)

Ornaments Under the Stars by trippednfell (M, 62k, wangxian, Modern, Inspired by Hallmark Christmas Movies, the wangxian Hallmark Movie AU no one asked for, plot and title were randomly generated, Kidfic, Disabled Character, debilitating injury as substitute for missing golden core, Additional Warnings In Author’s Note, Angst with a Happy Ending, Guest starring Lan Zhan’s sky blue coat, The Coat deserves its own tag, disordered eating habits - not a major plot point, WIP)

❤️ save a sword, ride a socialist by sysrae (E, 33k, wangxian, modern w magic, college/university au, fake/pretend relationship, single parent WWX, homophobia, light angst w/ happy ending, idiots to lovers, fluff)

‘Let’s go home.’ by Crowgirl (E, 27k, WangXian, Coffee Shops & Cafés, LQR's Excellent Parenting, Meet-Cute, First Kiss, First Time, First Meetings, Pining, Mutual Pining, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Angst with a Happy Ending, Modern AU, Past XiYao, past emotional abuse, Past Emotional Manipulation)

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14. hello! for the next itmf i have three requests! i would love to see canon/post-canon fics of

A. jingyi seeing wangxian as his parents

B. jin ling seeing wwx as a parent

C. jin ling struggling with his feelings about jc after finding out the truth about everything

no AUs please!

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15. Hi! so this request is under itmf i think!

i didn’t see much mention of this but are these any fics that talk about lwj and wwx’s class difference? anything where wwx gets to experience luxury for the first time as lwj’s husband? 🥹 it doesn’t have to be in detail but i would love to read about that!

as always thank you for your blog and all that you do 🫶

🧡 Stunted, Starving Juvenility by TomatenMark (E, 859k, WangXian, WIP, Fix-it of sorts, Talisman master WWX, Not JFM Friendly, Study Arc, Getting together, Fluff and Angst, Engagement) In the early parts of this fic, WWX worries about how LWJ is out of his league class-wise & that the elders will never allow them to get together

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16. hi! are there any canon divergence fics where wei ying snaps out of whatever disassociation he experienced and manages to save lan zhan before the elders can even get to punish him? like, the whipping didnt happen at wei ying lives type of beat. thank you!

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17. Hi! Hope you have a nice day! I’d like to ask for fics which include a-yuan calling Wuxian his dad or wwx calling wen qing his sister

The most dangerous thing is to love by KatAnni (E, 113k, WangXian, Golden Core Reveal, Fix-It, Everybody Lives, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Canon Divergence, Hurt!WWX, Found Family, Implied/Referenced Torture, POV Multiple, Implied/Referenced Cannibalism, Panic Attacks, PTSD, Golden Core Transfer, Golden Core Transfer Fix-it, Medical Procedures, Fainting, Major Character Injury, Blood and Injury, WWX Has a New Golden Core, Asexual JC, homophobia doesn’t exist here, Marriage Proposal, Marriage, Wedding Night, Whump) a-Yuan refers to Wei Ying as his dad starting in chapter 18

❤️ Seen and not heard by eatmyass (E, 51k, wangxian, case fic, no sunshot, kid fic, dadxian, strangers to lovers, found family, LWJ pov, pining, fake/pretend relationship, first time, falling in love)

The Core Issue by Hauntcats (T, 21k, WangXian, Angst with a Happy Ending, Not JC Friendly, Canon Divergence)

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If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***

[hold-him-down]

Hold Him Down (pt. 1)

TW: Med Whump, Gratuitous Med Whump, Medical Restraints, Chemical Restraints, Noncon Touch, Referenced Noncon, Parker Destin, Institutionalized Slavery, Noncon Drugging, Conditioning, Referenced Food/Water Restriction, Referenced/Described STI testing, Referenced/Described Shock Collar, Whumper POV, literally over 4k words wtf, get leo a pet fish and warm hug when.

Notes: This is one of those things that I'm, as usual, not sure needs to or should exist, but I spent so much time writing it that I couldn't just NOT post it, sooo here it is. Parts 4-6 coming eventually. Takes place in the 12-ish hour span after Leo is prematurely returned from our best guy, Parker Destin. This may be one that I revisit and try to refine down the line.

✥ ✥ ✥

From behind a two-way mirror, Handler Otto Gray and an unfamiliar intake handler stand, arms crossed over their chests. They watch Leo quietly, relieved that, at least for now, the dust has settled. 

His eyes finally closed, a few hours earlier, following a massive fight that ended in a sizable dose of Lorazepam. Even drugged, it took what felt like ages for him to settle down, and even longer for his body to finally go limp. Hours later, the salty tear-streaks are still visible on his cheeks.

The doctor asked them to wait on cleaning him up; in spite of the second handler’s objections, in spite of the apparently innate desire to put this unconscious boy in his place, the handler turned on his heels and left in a huff. Otto hesitated, sparing a quick glance at Leo. He wondered, briefly, how he had managed to fail so spectacularly, before dismissing the thought all together. Against his better judgment, he squeezed Leo’s hand briefly, then he checked to make sure the restraints were appropriately secured and exited. Today was sure to be a long day, sure to be even longer if they could not get a handle on whatever panic-induced psychosis Leo was clearly grappling with.

Somewhere in the middle of it all, shift change happened. The handler who had spent the evening scowling at Leo’s lifeless form clocked out, muttering a, “Good luck,” to his replacement. Otto stayed, though, with a quick glance at handler Nick Ford, according to his name tag, and a muttered greeting. Hopefully, he thinks, this one is better suited for this type of work than the last. The doctor comes up behind them, and the three stand in silence for a moment.

“He’s asleep?” the doctor asks, which is a question that could ordinarily be answered with a quick glance through a chart, but Leo has a notoriously unpredictable response to sedatives and that, if nothing else, has been noted numerously in his file.

Otto nods, his jaw locked. “I think so.”

Leo’s wrists are red, raw where each strap hugs them, but for the last few hours, they have been still. Mostly.

“For how long?” the doctor asks, thumbing through the notes from the night before. A colorful account of the events that led to this moment, which, although maybe not immediately helpful, might lend insight into the inner workings of Leo Evans.

“A couple hours,” Handler Ford supplies, and Otto is struck suddenly with a potent distaste for how this night has played out. 

It’s not out of the ordinary, exactly, for a worker to require this level of support after a contract.  He hoped, though, maybe naively, that Leo was more resilient than this.

He’s been drugged out of his mind, and as hard as he fought it, the drugs eventually dragged him under. To Otto’s understanding, it was only after several hours of trying to calm him down using other methods that he was eventually medicated, and, to Otto’s understanding, the doctor intends now to keep him drugged until he’s under control. He idly wonders if there’s a chance at modifying those plans. Leo is tough, sometimes damn near impossible to work with, but they had found a kind of balance when Otto was his handler. And he thinks, now, he can perhaps spare everyone some heartache if he can have a go at his former trainee.

Otto peers in closer to the window as Leo gasps, his wrists pulling once, lightly, at the straps.

“Alright,” the doctor says, at the same time that Leo’s eyes crack open. As Handler Ford reviews the notes with the Doctor, Otto studies Leo. He hadn’t been an easy trainee. He had been downright defiant at times, resistant to every standard training tool the DLS employed. Otto had been called in in his second month, after his primary handler was fired for, more or less, losing his patience with Leo one time too many, with Leo landing in the ICU. Even after that, success came in short, nearly unpredictable bursts.

When Leo had finally been cleared to take his first contract, that would usually have been the end of Otto’s time with him. But, at least in some of his most challenging successes, he liked to keep an eye on them, if not just to see how they did. He would tell you he did this to improve his own methods, and to help him understand the longer term implications of his work. That wouldn't be the whole truth, though. 

Leo was one of the select few that Otto found himself keeping an eye on. He had gotten through his first contract easily, and Otto recalled the feeling of immense relief as he read through Ms. Smith’s post-contract interview. Leo had been put in a short term holding site and almost immediately secured his second contract. That one wasn’t set to terminate for three months still, so when Otto got the notification that Leo’s file was being updated last night, he called in some favors with the intake department.

He stands here now, mostly frustrated, a little bit confused, and perhaps, maybe slightly sympathetic. Simmering beneath all that is anger, misplaced but a constant undertone that, he worries, may drive some of his decisions today. He buries it as deeply as he can. It serves neither him nor Leo.

Leo blinks hard toward the ceiling, but seems to clock his circumstances quickly. His head turns toward the mirror and for a moment, Otto thinks Leo can see him, right through him, right into the place Leo used to occasionally access and attempt to exploit.

Otto stares at his eyes, red, heavy, and unfocused, and wills Leo to remain calm. Leo swallows, and pulls again against the restraints.

Stop, Otto silently commands. But he doesn’t. Of course, he wouldn’t.

“What are the odds he’ll take it on his own?” Otto hears from next to him.

“What?” Otto responds, shifting his focus.

“The meds?” Handler Ford says as he holds up a small cup of pills in one hand, a syringe filled with an off-white liquid in the other.

“Oh,” Otto responds. The odds, he thinks, are nonexistent. The good news is this isn’t explicitly his problem anymore. 

“Any pointers?” Handler Ford asks then. At Otto’s look, he says, “You worked with him, right?” 

Otto nods, but doesn’t offer any pointer. Handler Ford stares at him intently, so, out of some misplaced desire to prove that he is not, in fact, completely incompetent with his trainees, he says, “A long time ago. I did his initial training after his first handler got canned.”

“What for?” Ford asks. He’s stalling, Otto thinks. 

“Assault,” Otto supplies. He inclines his head toward the room, and turns away from Handler Ford, re-orienting himself toward the window.

“Wish me luck?”

“Good Luck,” Otto says, not unkindly, as the handler disappears behind the door. Moments later, he is in Leo’s room.

Leo’s demeanor immediately shifts, from alarmed and fighting to gain function to panicked, but he stills, he swallows, he forces his eyes on the handler, and takes a breath. Good boy, Otto thinks.

He’s whispering something, but Otto can’t make out the words. He thinks he’s heard Parker’s name, and Handler Ford shakes his head.

Leo nods, then, and takes one of those deep, shuddering breaths that usually mean he’s on the edge of some big feelings. Otto, once more, leans closer to the window.

Handler Ford begins listing out the things he needs Leo to do this morning, and Leo’s brow creases as he takes it in, nodding after each item, but seemingly oblivious to the actual requests.

Inside the observation room, the doctor joins Otto.

“Do you know what happened?” Otto asks the doctor. Otto, immediately realizing he could be asking any number of things, clarifies, “That led to this. He didn’t have an issue after his first contract.”

“Sometimes they get freaked out after spending some time with a particularly cozy buyer,” he replies. 

Otto nods. 

In the room, Handler Ford’s hand is on Leo’s neck, pressing under the collar. Leo stays still, but Otto can see the fear in his eyes, behind layers and layers of grief. It’s odd, seeing him like this.

“You didn’t last too long, did you?” Handler Ford is saying, dripping condescension, as Leo swallows, holding in a fresh wave of tears.

✥ ✥ ✥

“It’s nothing personal, Leo.” Parker’s driver waits for Leo just beyond the threshold. In his hand, Parker holds out a DLS-issued bag.

Leo nods.

Parker grabs his face between his hands and presses his lips to Leo’s forehead. “You have to understand I didn’t plan for this,” he’s saying, but Leo’s ears are ringing. “I would have waited to take on a worker if I had any inclination I would be called away.” His words are kind, Leo thinks, but there’s almost a note of condescension under them. 

Leo feels a sort of emptiness spreading throughout him, a cold void that precedes what he could only describe as terror. For what’s next. For losing this thing, that he isn’t sure he should want, but he wants, so desperately. He clings to it. 

“Parker, I– I can,” Leo starts, taking a step back. He can, what? fix this? do better? be better? “Please don’t do this…”

Parker’s thumbs glide across Leo’s cheeks.

“I thought they beat that out of you,” Parker says, his lips pulled into a half-smile. Leo falters, the words he has prepared are completely knocked out of him.

“I– I’m sorry,” is all he can now formulate. He can feel his circumstances changing as every second passes. He’s going to be sick. The feeling of bile rising wars against the knowledge that if he is sick at this moment, it will be unforgivable. 

Parker’s hands drift down to Leo’s shoulders and he pulls him into a half-hug, pressing his forehead against Leo’s.

“Don’t worry about it,” Parker says. He wants to say more, Leo thinks.

Instead, Parker uses the grip he has on Leo’s shoulder to push him away and rakes his eyes slowly over Leo, from his head to his toes. He smiles and grabs the collar of Leo’s shirt, poking out from under a deep blue sweater. It’s Parker’s favorite.

He inclines his head briefly toward the door and Leo counts every breath he takes.

“They said not to send your books and clothes and things,” Parker explains as he pulls open the front door. “It’ll just go to waste. I can donate it, if you’d like?”

And Leo, in that moment, hesitates. Can he ask Parker to keep it, for when he gets back from his trip? Maybe, he thinks. Maybe Parker hasn’t considered that Leo could stay in the house and look after it, and he doesn’t need to send him away. 

And then it occurs to Leo that maybe Parker is using this time to help figure out the gaps in his training, because they’ve been butting heads lately, and if that’s the case, he wants to tell Parker that he will take this time seriously, and will be better suited to be what Parker needs him to be when he returns.

Leo opens his mouth to say this, to say any of it, even just to tell Parker that he will try harder when he gets back from his trip.

But the panic wraps itself around Leo’s throat, and Leo says nothing.

✥ ✥ ✥

“Are you ready to behave?” The words distort around the edges and Leo blinks hard, willing himself to focus.

This handler, Leo thinks, is unfamiliar to him. There is a fuzziness to both his vision and his thoughts, compounded by blurry memories of the night before. The handler is standing just outside of his line of sight, offering terse reprimands each time he fails to respond. He is trying, though. He wants to tell them he’s trying, but his tongue feels too thick and his voice won’t work.

There’s an added danger that Leo tries not to acknowledge, even silently. They’ve put a training collar on him, but they haven’t gone so far as to shock the world into focus. Even if his limbs didn’t weigh a thousand pounds, he would not be able to lift them. Thick canvas straps wound tightly around each wrist and ankle keep him in place, and Leo blinks at the unexpected wave of terror: these people can and will hurt him with no regard for the fact that he is wholly unable to protect himself. 

The drugs help him accept these facts, but do not help him to forget them.

Memories of the night before claw their way to the surface. Of the sound of his own screaming, of gloved hands pinning him down, of his clothing being pulled off of his body. Of Parker's favorite sweater, which he held tightly to his chest, as it was ripped from his arms. He flinches at the memory of himself, just [some?] hours earlier, as he begged them to let him keep it, as a needle digs its way deep into his thigh. The darkness was quick to swallow him up after that.

And then there are other memories, too, from later in the night. Distorted flashes of the handlers coming to visit him, of cold hands pulling off the thin blanket that had been draped over him. He wondered if the drugs might ease the pain. When they didn’t, he allowed himself a moment of relief in the hope that this might all just be written off as a drug-induced nightmare in the light of day.

And now, the drugs fading, and the light of day doing nothing to erase ache deep inside of him, he swallows, blinking slowly, and longs only for the reprieve that unconsciousness may bring. That maybe they will drug him again, before they touch him again. His stomach turns over, and he draws his focus to the lights on the ceiling.

“He’s lost some weight,” he hears the doctor say, but they aren’t speaking to him, so he closes his eyes and taps each finger on the pad beneath him, just to see if he can feel them all. 

“His buyer kept him hungry,” the handler replies. He can, he thinks, feel them all. “My understanding is he kept him on a pretty strict eating plan.”

Leo recoils, hearing Parker’s voice in his head. The DLS has asked that you start out on a kind of strict meal plan for a little bit. He blinks back tears at the unwelcome memories. Of Parker, event after event, selecting everything he ate, everything he touched. Of the imperceptible nod Parker would give him when he reached for something at the dinner table. Or the terse shake of his head when he moved to something unacceptable. 

Leo wants to tell these men that Parker didn’t keep him hungry. That he was just enacting the plan he had been given.

“I’ll need a copy of it,” the doctor responds, and Leo squeezes his eyes shut, forcing his mind blank.

“It’s in his file,” the handler says. Leo’s ears ring. 

“Good.” The doctor presses his hands fingers into the back of Leo’s neck, the collar momentarily tightening as the fingers explore under it. “He’s dehydrated,” he says, and Leo can picture the handler typing his notes. “Are you going to tell me the buyer restricted his water intake too?”

From somewhere far away, the handler laughs, and Leo’s expression tightens, momentarily stunned by the mockery.

“It’s alright,” he thinks he hears, but the voices are so far away now. He doesn’t know that he’s crying until he feels a thumb wiping at his cheek, and Leo sucks in a breath. “You’re alright.”

The world stands still for what could be seconds or minutes or longer. When the doctor’s hand finally migrates upward, and a light is shined into each of Leo’s eyes, he is momentarily blinded, but immediately aware that he has lost time.

The doctor’s fingers, inches from his face, snap once. “Hi, Leo,” he says simply. And then, “I’m Dr. Grant. Are you with me?”

Leo swallows, which hurts, and other memories slide to the surface of the night before. He tries to nod. The movement makes his head pound. “Yes,” he whispers, but based on the doctor’s– what was his name?– grimace, he doesn’t think it came out right.

The doctor sighs and seemingly gives up on Leo’s active participation, instead pulling the blanket down to Leo’s waist and putting a stethoscope to Leo’s chest. It’s nothing, Leo thinks, but it’s never just this. He closes his eyes again and begins counting in his head. Every so often, he forgets where he left off, and he starts over.

The doctor explains what he’s doing as he works, and Leo wonders idly if it’s for his benefit or for some other reason. To pass the time, and maybe to distract himself, Leo imagines a new doctor in the adjacent observation room, learning this trade. He wonders if it’s a good doctor or a bad doctor, and opens his eyes just enough to glance toward the mirror, to see if he can spot him back there. There are no good doctors here, he decides, and starts counting again.

The doctor looks at Leo’s wrists and describes them to the handler, who writes it all down. He examines Leo’s arms and his shoulders and his chest and his stomach as he searches for signs that Parker hurt him beyond what would be considered reasonable, which he didn’t, Leo wants to say, and that Parker will come back for him after his trip, and that he needs to be ready to go home. Then he starts counting again, because the idea of telling this man that Parker will come back for him will be met with laughter, and Leo doesn’t know if he can handle it. He’s pretty sure he can’t.

Fingers prod at Leo’s stomach and he can’t suppress the accompanying flinch, and as the drugs start to wear thin, he feels himself less and less able to accept what is being done to him.

“Alright, Leo,” the doctor says, and Leo opens his eyes and is met with mostly, he thinks, concern.

“I’ll be back.” The doctor shoots the handler a look, and Leo wants to close his eyes again, but as the handler approaches, Leo knows, acutely, that it’s a bad idea.

“Are you going to cause a scene?” the handler asks, before lifting the blanket from Leo’s lap. Leo shrinks back, an instant passing in which his entire body goes rigid, but shakes his head ‘no.’ He hopes it’s enough.

He holds his breath, waiting for it to be over, or, waiting for it to start, and feels the handler’s eyes sliding down his body.

He thinks he might be shaking, but he isn’t sure. 

The doctor returns a moment later, and after a quick assessment of how things have evolved, issues a quick but gentle, “It’s alright.” It’s not, though, and Leo locks his jaw to keep from crying. He wants to ask if he can close his eyes again. Sometimes they would let him, when things were about to get really bad, in initial training. Sometimes, if he asked clearly, and if he caught them on a good day, they would let him.

“No wonder he was returned,” the handler says, leaning back against the wall. 

“Can I close my eyes?” he whispers then, before he can catch the humor in the handler’s expression. The doctor looks at him once, and nods. Leo doesn’t hesitate to clamp his eyes shut, unwilling to chance opening them at all, maybe ever, and instead continues counting in his head. 

“Continue working on your empathy,” the doctor says evenly, but Leo is pretty sure he isn’t speaking to him so he works on breathing and counting and nothing else.

He tries to block out the words. This is another moment in training, and it too will end eventually. 

“They put him through hell in training. He has a right to be mistrustful.” And then, to Leo, he says, “I’m going to give you something to help balance you out,” and his touch disappears. “Just hang tight, Leo.” 

Without warning, a hand clamps around his neck, pinning him in place. His eyes fly open, his arms pull instinctively against the restraints, as the tip of a syringe is pushed past his teeth and to the back of his throat.

He gags, his head knocking back against the thin pillow, but the handler’s grip is merciless, and in the next instant, a thick, bitter liquid is sliding down his throat. Tears well in his eyes, and he would swear the culprit was simply the bitterness of the medicine.

It’s mistaken for something else, though, and the handler releases him as the doctor runs a hand through his hair and says, “You’re alright.”

Leo’s shaking harder now, and his fingers grip into the pad he lays on and he urges himself to still. His chest aches as he tries to catch his breath, the taste of the medicine still heavy on his tongue. But still, almost immediately, he can feel his body lightening, the tension pulling back until the shaking eases, and the doctor nods, and approaches. Leo can’t feel the fear he knows he should feel. 

He can feel nothing.

Even with the memories of the night before, even with the doctor and the handler so close to him, he can breathe again.

Still, Leo can’t contain the subconscious jerk of his body as a flash of sharp pain shoots through him. The doctor issues an apology, along with a soft, “almost done,” and turns the swab, over and over, as Leo’s legs fight against the hands that hold them in place. He tries to find a place in his mind to retreat into, but he hasn’t been there in months, if not longer, and in that moment, it offers no reprieve. He thinks he cries out, locking his teeth and pressing his head back into the pillow as hard as he can to distract himself from what goes on lower. When the doctor is finished, he wipes Leo down and drapes the blanket over his lap.

What he doesn’t say is ‘Good, Leo,’ because they would both know it to be untrue. 

Still, in the next breath, the restraints are being unbuckled, and Leo is lifted at his shoulders until he is sitting, and his wrists are being examined, and there is a hand rubbing his back. He blinks slowly, willing the room back into focus, and he can hear voices but he isn’t able to follow their conversation.

“It doesn’t need to be this hard,” he thinks the handler is saying, and even though his head is hung low and his shoulders are scrunched to make him as small as possible, in his peripherals he can see the doctor shooting the handler a sharp look. “What?” he bites back. “It’s true.”

“Alright, Leo,” the doctor says then, ignoring the handler entirely. Leo keeps his eyes locked on the ground and he takes the blanket in a white-knuckled grip.

The doctor lets him catch his breath, rubbing his back every few seconds. Leo thinks he’s using it to get a read on his heart rate, but he doesn’t care just then. The doctor explains what’s next, and moves to ease Leo onto his side. Leo, for his part, cooperates, lowering himself slowly, watching as his fingers shake. He wraps his arms so tightly around his stomach he think he might leave bruises, but when the doctor touches him, he doesn’t flinch.

“There’s some bruising,” the doctor says neutrally, but Leo can’t look at the handler to see if he types it. It could be from the handlers, or it could be from Parker’s friends the night before. Leo chokes on his next breath, and in spite of the drugs, he can feel the panic rising.

“Leo?” the doctor says. “Are you doing alright?” 

The handler takes a step forward.

“I don’t consent to this,” Leo whispers, so softly he isn’t sure anyone hears him. The look the handler levels on him is scathing. “I–I kn…know it doesn’t… I know it doesn’t matter.” His voice is soft, slurred around the edges, but clear enough. “But I… I j-just– I want to make sure you know.”

The doctor says nothing, and the handler frowns. Leo wants to ask him to type it into his chart, but the doctor moves behind him, and Leo’s vision is suddenly and immediately blurred by his tears. 

By the time they finish, by the time the doctor drapes the blanket over his hips, letting his hand rest on Leo’s head briefly before retreating, Leo’s body is wracked with sobs. They leave him to calm himself down, and he finds himself, for a moment, grateful for the simple mercy.

But he cannot stop crying, as he stares into the mirror and thinks of all he’s lost. Of what, in spite of what he tried to convince himself he could have, he will never have. Of Parker, laughing with his friends as he picks out a new worker. Of the handler, and all those that came before him, smiling as they hurt him. The door opens with no warning and a familiar voice, a voice warm enough to burn Leo’s entire world down, issues a commanding, clear, “Stop this, Leo.” 

And almost instantly, Leo stops.

FIGHTER TAG LIST:

@whump-cravings

@afabulousmrtake

@crystalquartzwhump

@maracujatangerine

@pumpkin-spice-whump

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@highwaywhump

@batfacedliar-yetagain

@finder-of-rings

@dont-touch-my-soup

@skyhawkwolf

@suspicious-whumping-egg

@also-finder-of-rings

@whump-for-all-and-all-for-whump

@peachy-panic

@melancholy-in-the-morning

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@lonesome--hunter 

@darkthingshappen 

@alexmundaythrufriday

@whumps-and-bumps

[girlboybug]

writing request for a smut fic with established relationship with javi x reader? dialogue prompt: javi: “he looked at you funny” reader: “i didn’t know you were the jealous type..”

OOO i like this muahaha >:) i hope you enjoy hehe, thank u for requesting!! <3

art deco

"shining like gunmetal, cold and unsure. baby you're so ghetto, you're lookin' to score."

or the one where jealousy happens to be a good look on javi.

what’s playing 🎧 : art deco by lana del rey

content warnings : SMUT, jealous!javi, blowjobs, face fucking, car sex, semi public sex (?), unprotected sex (extremely unwise w javi idk wtf he got goin on down there), creampie, breeding kink, dirty talk, themes of slut shaming, threats of exhibitionism, threats of restraints e.g cuffs, brat tamer!javi (been dying to write that)

trigger warnings : mentions/threats of gun usage, alcohol, both reader and javier are tipsy at best, if there is anything i missed pls lmk!

word count : 4k

a/n : im pulling SO MUCH out my ass w this bc i havent finished narcos and only rlly pay attention when pedro or boyd is on screen and even tho im half mexican my ass cannot speak spanish for the life of me teehee sorry yall

you’re a bad actor. 

you’re also bad at lying and honestly, just generally bad at the things javier happens to be especially good at. 

but that’s okay, javier likes you like that. it’s refreshing, endearing, to be with someone who hasn’t gotten good at lying or pretending to be someone they’re not. and actually, he’s currently watching you fail at that right now. 

you’re at the bar, swirling around your drink that he bought for you, pretending to not notice the way he’s eyeing you from across the club. he thinks it's cute how you keep stealing glances at him, giggling to yourself whenever he catches you.

you two do this little song and dance every now and then, it keeps things exciting and fun, and you never have complaints about it. 

you pretend to be the single, bored girl sitting alone at the bar, and javier just so happens to swoop in, introducing himself as the man who’s been ordering drinks for you all night, ready to charm you into his bed for the night. it’s stupid when you say it out loud, but the way he fucks you when you do this little act makes it seem like the best goddamn idea he’s ever come up with.

it’s harmless fun between a couple, and the tension you two create throughout the night is always a recipe for mind blowing sex. however, it seems things are going a bit off script tonight. 

a man invites himself to the empty barstool beside you that was reserved for javier, but he’s oblivious to the little game you’re playing right now. “hi there,” he says, grinning, and you try your best to hold back a long sigh while you greet him back politely. 

javier’s hand tightens around the beer he’s got, wishing the neck of the bottle belonged to the man staring you down. he decides he’ll keep watch for awhile, he trusts you, and wants to see how this’ll play out, despite his patience already wearing dangerously thin.

“can i buy you another drink?” he asks, motioning towards the dwindling liquid in your glass. its not a difficult question, but the answer isn’t coming to you like it should be. 

you are playing the role of a single woman tonight, and you won’t let anything go further with this guy than receiving a free drink. 

eh. why not? 

“yeah, sure, thank you.” you smile back, and he hurriedly calls over the bartender, asking for two glasses of whatever it is you ordered. javier shifts in his seat, his jaw coming down harder than it was just a moment ago as he watches you share a drink with someone that isn’t him. 

javier follows his wandering eyes, how they trail up and down your figure, making it obvious he’s wondering what you’ve got on underneath.

javier wants to walk up to him to tell him how he knows what you’ve got under that dress, because he picked it out. 

god, this night fuckin’ sucks so far. 

“i noticed you for awhile now, what’re you doin’ here all alone?” he asks, and you get a little nervous with the way he gets closer to you. “i’m just waiting for my boyfriend to show up.” you answer, deciding the single woman role didn’t feel as fun anymore. 

“ahh, i see.” he replies, and you expect him to scoot farther from you, or better yet, leave. but much to your dismay, he stays. 

“it’s just,” he starts, and you glance down at your shoes, saying a silent prayer for him to get on with what he’s got to say before he leaves you alone for good. 

“you’ve been here for awhile now, you sure he’s comin’ honey?” he questions you, faux concern in his voice and you close your eyes for a moment to hide the way they roll at him.

“yeah, i’m sure.” you reply curtly. “how about i keep you some company while you wait for him then, how’s that sound?” he gets closer than you would’ve liked, boldly resting his arm around your shoulders, and yep, that’ll do it. 

javier’s beer clatters down onto his table as he shoots up from his seat, stalking over to you. he’s quick to join you, standing tall behind your seated figure, his strong chest a familiar surface against your back. 

“uh who’re you–” 

“her boyfriend.” he answers, eyes lowered testingly, practically itching for him to give him a reason to swing. “hi baby,” you beam, turning around and craning your neck up to give him a kiss. he leans down, holding your chin while he kisses you. 

with your lips still connected, he stares at the scoffing man that just sits and watches. 

“yeah well i wasn’t the one who kept her waiting all night so why don’t you get lost? we were havin’ a conversation, weren’t we sweetheart?” he looks at you as if you’d actually agree, and you open your mouth to defend javier, but he doesn’t need you to, he’s more than eager to put this guy back in his place. 

he steps away from behind your back, moving right in front of you now, leaning in close to the man. he reaches around to his lower back, sliding his gun to the side of his waist before he’s got it in his clutch, pressing it to the man’s ribs.

“you have 3 seconds to get the fuck out my face before i stop being so polite.” he whispers in his ear, and the man stiffens with immediate fear once he registers what’s being pointed at him. 

he swivels out of the stool, hastily hopping out to make his way out the club all together. javier turns back to you once he’s out of his field of vision, expecting a profuse thank you javi, but he gets quite the opposite. 

“what the hell was that?” you question, sounding angry, and uh oh, you saw that. 

“baby,” he starts off but you just huff, climbing off the stool. “that was way too far,” you point at him and he sighs, holding your arms, rubbing them up and down, trying to settle your irritation down. 

“but he was making you uncomfortable, and you didn’t see the way he was looking at you–” 

“and what way was he looking at me for you to pull a gun out on him?” you whisper yell and he starts to join you in your frustration. 

“he looked at you…funny, like he was just thinking about fucking you the entire time.” he sounds upset that he even has to explain himself to you about this, and you catch it, deciding to throw it back at him when you turn on your heel to leave. 

he growls with annoyance as he follows you out the club, grabbing your arm and forcing you to turn back and look at him.

you exhale sharply, looking up at him, switching your weight onto your left foot. “i knew you could be a little…impulsive sometimes but jesus jav, i didn’t realize you were the jealous type that would do something so…stupid.”

his annoyance is fast to turn into a hard glare, and you see the sudden shift, instantly feeling regretful. he purses his lips to the side, laughing dryly. “stupid huh?” he clicks his tongue and you shake your head, walking closer to him now.

“javi, i’m sorry,” you try to remedy the mess of this situation, but unlucky for you, what little patience he was holding onto is now gone. 

he grabs the hand of yours that’s reaching towards his jaw, he isn’t in the mood for it. he pulls you along by your wrist to the parking lot. 

“yeah, you’re about to be baby,” he mutters, and your heart picks up, your heel clad feet in turn picking up speed to keep up with him. 

he ushers you into his backseat, slamming the door behind you once you’re both in. he tugs you into his lap, your legs on either side of him, your knees making contact with the cold vinyl. his hands find their way to your ass, squeezing it hard.

you gasp a little, arching into his chest. the second you move in closer, his lips are on your’s. it’s not gentle, it’s not slow paced, and it’s not soft, no, that’s for when you’re good. and you’ve been anything but. 

you’re grinding in his lap, his growing bulge feels perfect right up against your dampening panty clad cunt, too perfect that you can’t stop yourself. you’re moaning in his mouth, struggling to keep up the pace and intensity in the way his lips are moving with your’s. 

he tastes like beer and cigarettes, smells like it too, with traces of his cologne that you love. he’s like paradise incarnate and you want to live in him forever. 

when he pulls away you're left panting in his hold, lips parted, brushing against each other, stealing the other person’s breaths. “you know,” he sighs lowly, his words trailing up your spine, leaving shivers in their wake. 

“just because i let you pretend you’re single for the night doesn’t mean you actually are,” he says, and he sounds serious, but there’s something hidden in his air, something challenging, like he wants you to argue just so he can put you right back where you belong. 

you nod heavily like he speaks words of righteousness, cupping his jaw in your hands. “i know javi, i know,” you pepper his face in kisses, but he remains still, outwardly unphased.

“guess you just got too excited at the thought of bein’ a slut huh?” he breathes out flicking a brow at you, keeping you in close when you try to inch away from him at his accusations. 

“i’m not a slut–” he unfolds your offended arms, hands leaving your wrists to hold your thighs that rest on either side of his lap. “no baby it’s alright, s’not a totally bad thing. i like sluts. they let you do whatever you want to ‘em,” he grips your thighs, forcefully sliding you off his lap and letting you land down on your knees before him. you gasp, holding onto his legs for steadiness. 

“and they let you all while tryin’ to convince you they aren’t sluts. isn’t that funny? he chuckles, caressing your cheek, peering down at you while he does so. 

“javi,” you say, you don’t know what to say next, the only certainty that remains is that his name never sounds wrong coming from you. 

“if you wanna be a slut so bad then go ahead, i won’t stop you.” he shrugs, leaning back into the seat, arms stretched out beside him. you swallow away your stuttering, running your hands up and down your thighs. “what do you want me to do?” you ask smally, looking up at him from under your lashes. 

he readjusts, lifting his hips in the air, settling back down closer to you. he tilts his head, eyes flickering from his crotch back to your gaze, “what sluts do best baby.” he says under a gravelly breath. your thighs close just a little tighter at that, feeling eager to oblige to his insinuations. 

you unzip his levi’s, unbuttoning them before you’re pulling him from out his boxers, throat getting tight at the way he pulses in your hands. precum is already beading at his tip, and you lean forward, flicking your tongue over it. he hisses quietly, a hand coming behind your neck. 

your lips envelope the tip, shutting your eyes when you trail down until you can’t take any more of him down your throat. he groans, throwing his head back, bucking his hips into your mouth. you gag around him, hand trembling while you try to jerk off what you can’t fit into your mouth. 

he rolls his head forward, holding you by the back of your head, starting to thrust further in, chuckling to himself at the way you gag. he lets you slide off him, jerking his slick cock off while you catch your breath. 

you’re staring at each other in the thick air, the night breeze sneaking in from the cracked windows, making your nipples perk from behind your lacy bra. 

the moon glimmers through the side window facing javier, and it panels his cheekbone, across his jaw and down his chin, trickling over the curve of his collarbones. 

he looks so beautiful like this, sitting tall in front of you, looking at you like he could tear you apart with one hand, jaw clenching when your thumb slides over the head of his cock. 

the way he’s looking at you elicits a reaction from your body before your mind can reach it. you lean back down, taking him deeper into your mouth. 

you don’t mind the way he keeps your head still, using your mouth the way he likes. 

he fucks your mouth like he wants to prove a point, and at this moment he doesn’t even know what the point is, he hardly even remembers where he’s currently at, the only thing that makes sense is how fucking good you’re taking him down your throat. 

you’re being so good, so perfectly compliant for him, and what’s fueling you is the tingles exploding between your thighs at the way he’s using you. 

the grunting utterances of your name in his spewing breaths adds propellent to the roaring fire building in your lower tummy. 

his groans get a little airier, picking up in quantity, coming out one after the other, fucking your mouth so deep your nose brushes against the brown curls sitting just above his cock. “look at me,” he instructs through gritted teeth, and you listen, blinking away your teary eyes to look up at him. 

he sends one, two, three, hard thrusts into your mouth before he pulls out, resting the tip over your lips. he pants to himself, shutting his eyes closed while you take this time to do the same and catch your own breath. “what’s wrong?” you sound a little rasped, and he can’t fight the smug look on his face at your voice. 

“as much as i’d like to let you continue, i got better things planned baby,” he chuckles breathlessly, pulling you back up into his lap. 

he pushes your dress up, exhaling when he sees how wet you are in the panties he picked out for you. “javi, i didn’t bring any condoms, do you have one?” you press your hands to his chest, momentarily halting him, and he looks at you, scoffing quietly. 

“huh. sluts don’t usually care about that kinda thing.” he rubs the head of his cock over your clothed clit, watching your lowered eyes fully shut, a moan slipping out at his ministrations, proving him right. “s’not gonna fit like this,” your whimper when he moves your panties to the side, flicking himself up and down your folds. “it will baby, i’ll make it fit.” he promises, pressing a kiss to your lips.

you rarely ever got on top, he was always very adamant about taking care of you, whether that means you’re on your back, legs thrown over his shoulders or you with your wrists being hoisted by his tight grip while he fucks you senseless.

the constant is, he’s always on top. 

he’s big, no matter the position he’s got you in, it’s always a stretch he has to ease you into. which is why you’re typically reluctant to get on top, but right now he isn’t asking, he’s telling. 

“javi, s’not gonna go in like this,” you whimper nervously, curling into his chest. head on his shoulder. he rolls his eyes, fingers gliding right over your clit to shut you up. and it works, naturally, he chuckles. 

your breath gets faster when he swirls over your clit with his fingers, squirming around in his lap. he holds himself from the base of his cock, circling over your fluttering hole. your arms wrap around his broad shoulders, fingers playing with the back of his hair. 

he starts crowning into you, pushing in the fat head of his cock, pausing the breath in the middle of your throat. it rumbles out as a pained moan when he continues pushing in. “god javi,” you whine, legs on either side of him flexing with nerves at the intrusion. 

“doin’ all the work for you baby, jus’ take it for me,” he mutters in your ear, his mustache tickling your jaw while he rubs your clit to ease you into it.

“actin’ like i haven’t fucked this pussy before, know you can handle it, sè una niña grande para mí,” he murmurs, kissing your cheek, and you melt, nodding desperately. “i am,” you mumble, bracing yourself for when he bottoms out inside you. he thrusts upward, holding you by the fat your ass, pulling you down onto him. 

the air is knocked out your lungs, and all you can do is hold on to his leather clad shoulders for dear life. your hips start moving in sync, rolling into each other, and you feel insane, it feels so good, you start thinking maybe you’ll do this more often.

the sting from the stretch subsides soon, but the feeling of being full stays, and you keep it, loving how good it feels. the head of his cock nudges deep inside you, bobbing up into your throat and you fall apart, fucking yourself on him, addicted to the way he hits every little spot inside you that you need. 

you’re moaning, panting loudly in his ear, and he eats every single one of them up, gripping your hips when he guides you down onto him. kisses lay wetly across the side of his neck, teeth graze over his ear, praises of how fucking big he is, and how good he feels inside you, relay to him over and over, making his cock twitch when he picks up the pace in his thrusts. 

“you’re so nice while i fuck you baby, maybe this is how i should shut you up more often huh?” he teases, but you don’t care, you’d start arguments with him if it meant he’d always feel this good in you. 

“in so deep,” you whimper more to yourself but he hears you, he hears it all. he hears how fucking soaked you are around him, hears every little breath, every little moan that comes out of you. 

he smacks over your ass, chuckling to himself when you whine and clamp down around him. “maybe i should go find that guy huh?” he leans forward, lips on your shoulder when he ruts up into you deeper, right there to hold you closer when you keen into him at the hard thrust.

“ ‘should find him and fuck you in front of him, show him how its done, what do you think of that baby?” he grunts, hands tightening over your hips. 

you just moan, babbling something incoherent when you grind down onto him, his words acting as a lighter underneath the growing flame while you bounce on him. you squeeze around him, your body unashamed of how much you like the idea of such a dirty act. 

he feels the way you clamp down around him, chuckling breathlessly, his hand traveling behind your neck to force you to look at him. “or maybe it’s you who’d like that,” he taunts, expecting a shy shake of your head, but you just nod, trying to meet his thrusts. "i'll do whatever you want javi," you whimper pathetically, and god, that does something to him. 

"know you will, so sweet baby," he groans, leaning back to watch where you both meet, loving the sight of his cock entering and disappearing into your cunt. 

you tug at the hair from the back of his head, messily kissing all over his jaw and cheek, and he takes it all, adoring how clingy you are with him right now. he pulls the front of your dress down, hooking his fingers under the cups of your bra and groaning to himself when he sees your tits, pretty and pert under the bra, he of course, picked out for you. 

black see-through lace, his favorite. 

"gonna be the death of me, mi vida," he murmurs to himself, latching his hot eager mouth over them. he assaults the soft skin with his tongue, teeth grazing over your sensitive nipples, a smirk forming around the flesh when he teases the ghost of a bite, wanting to laugh when you squirm and arch your back at his actions. 

his fingers find their place back to your clit, rubbing over the nerves like clockwork, syncing the way you bounce on him with harder thrusts, making the pleasure surrounding you inescapable. 

breathing is getting harder, but it feels unimportant, everything does when it comes to javi. in this moment if he told you to stop breathing altogether you honestly just might listen to him. 

but it's so much so soon, and you want to hold onto the moment for as long as you can, enjoy each stroke of his cock deep inside you longer, and if he keeps touching you like this, you know you won't last. you paw at his hand, trying to push the relentless wrist away. "no more javi, m'gonna cum too fast please," you whimper, but he doesn't agree. you're finished when he's finished. 

"do i need to cuff you to the headrest or are you gonna keep those hands to yourself?" he spits, sounding harsh, sounding serious. you whine like a wounded puppy, shaking that empty little head of yours. 

"but javi," he grabs your chin, guiding your gaze downward when he moves his jacket to the side, revealing the cuffs that hang from his belt loops. "think i'm kiddin'? hands to yourself or around me. otherwise you get these. your choice," he's still inside you, and you can't take it, you throw your arms around him, hugging him close while trying to get him to move again. 

"gonna be good, gonna listen, m'sorry, please move javi, please?" 

he senses your desperation, and gives in, continuing his thrusts. you sigh in relief, following the way his hips piston up into you with your own. 

"can i touch you?" you whisper, unsure if you're allowed to, but javier relents, nodding with a kiss to your neck. you slide his jacket off eagerly, quickly unbuttoning his shirt before your hands are running along the warm skin of his shoulders, squeezing them when he thrusts right there. 

your hands drag down his chest, nails lightly digging into his tanned skin when your head falls back, rising and falling up and down on his cock. his mouth is on you again, tongue swirling over the curve of your chest, gripping them roughly in his wide palms. 

he watches you from this view, how you lose yourself when he's got his cock in you, and he thinks maybe he should have encouraged you to ride him earlier. 

he's getting close, watching you has only pulled him closer to the end, his cock twitching the more he imagines how good you'd look dripping in his cum. he imagines your trembling thighs being parted by his hands, your abused hole just leaking and leaking from his cum. 

"m'close, gonna let me finish inside mi vida?" he grunts, and you nod heavily, clamping harder down around him when he asks. "please, please javi," you beg, and who is he to deny you? 

his fingers run around your clit once more, those tight circles from the pads of his fingers bring you right there alongside with him, moaning his name in an incomprehensible voice while his face rests in the crook of your neck, bouncing you on top of him. 

"always wanted to cum in you baby, always wanted to fill you up nice an' good —fuck—, make you fuckin' full of me, just know you'd look so fuckin' good just drippin– shit," you're squeezing him like you never have before, his confessions, the ferver in the way he fucks you is just too much, your body acts before you can even process what’s happening. 

you cum all around his cock, and the pulsing of your walls, the whimpers of his name from your pretty lips is all he needs to join you in your blinding orgasm. he's cumming inside you, grunting your name and how fuckin' good you are for him, his mouth hot on your neck while he fucks you through your shared orgasms. 

he doesn't let up on your clit until the pleasure bleeds into pain, and you can't take it. with heavy breaths you collapse in his arms, panting like you've just ran a marathon, sweaty forehead resting on the cool leather of the seat. 

he gently shifts your hips backward, looking down at his cum that pours out of you. he likes the mess, likes how your cunt looks when he rubs his cum across your throbbing clit, you jump at the stimulation, begging him in a tired voice, no more javi. 

he listens, taking sympathy on your spent body. he puts your panties back over you, tucking himself away before he repositions you so you're properly sitting in his lap, letting your legs stretch across the rest of the backseat. 

"you okay mi bebita?" he murmurs softly, and you hum a sleepy yes, still buzzing from your orgasm. "still mad?" he asks jokingly, pulling a hazy giggle from you.

“i think you just fucked any anger i had left out of me." he laughs proudly at that, rubbing your back. "yeah? maybe that's how we should settle all our fights then." 

[trippinsorrows]

well.

i just finished a scene for ltye, and this shit is 4k words. one single fucking scene. like these fuckers are in one setting the whole time, and it ended up four thousand mother fucking words. 😐 so now, idk, maybe her birthday will have to be split up into two chapters cause this shit is fucking wild. i still have so much left to cover like wtf 😭😭😭😭😭

i know that ya'll have expressed being okay with long chapters, but it has to flow well and right. if it feels too compacted, i'm splitting it.

but like i'm genuinely annoyed cause how tf did this shit end up being so long?!? 😩😩😩

and before ya'll nasty asses ask, no, it's not all spicy. well, not entirely.

[neteyamyawne]

A/n : I'm in my Jake and neytiri feels for now so I'm gonna write all their requests now 🙂😩🤌🏼 y'all get ready. It's freaking 7.2k words wtf? I thought it'll be 4k max, i think i just proved myself wrong 😭💀 I'm so sorry this took so long 😭

Snarr ♡

Pairing : Jake x reader x neytiri

Summary : request

Light 🕯️

❈ Warning : mild to no angst, war, mention of blood, blacking out, injury, fluff, mutual pinning, etc. Let me know if more

❈ Word count : 7.2k , not at all proof read

"word" - dialogue

❈ Note : holy shit 7.2k? Even I'm surprised i wrote this much lmao

❈ Glossary : y/n - your name, y/t/n - your tulkun name, yawne - beloved, tiyawn - love , tsmuke - sister etc. Let me know if any were left out

I was swimming with tsireya when we heard the horns blow, it was uncommon to have newcomers here on Awa'atlu, i looked at tsireya who was already looking at me, this was new, just then we saw a few creatures flying over us, first i mistook them for tsuraks but then i saw them closely, these were different, i had an inkling what they were but i needed to see it myself, getting on a ilu, Reya and I, glided over to the shore.

As we reached the shallow waters, i dipped in, Reya following me, standing up i brushed away the hair that stuck to my neck and chest while i looked at the more bluer Na'vi than us, my eyes trailed, what looked like, the family of six, more exactly on the couple who stood in the front, their eyes were such beautiful amber color, changing every now and then in the sunlight, their hair beautifully braided with beads and trinkets, their attire had vines and ropes creatively threaded together, as i was looking them over, i made eye contact with the gorgeous woman who stood with courage and strength oozing from her, i smiled and blood rushed to my cheeks as i looked down when she gave me a slight smile back, walking towards tsireya and standing by her side, in between tonowari and her, while slapping ao'nung's shoulder when he made fun of the newcomer boy.

The atmosphere in the air was thick with tension as Ronal criticized the family roughly, they were here for uthuru, which has not been asked since years before i was born, the group of kids looked tired from the trip and so did their mother, though she was trying not to show it, Ronal then pointed out their flaws, i cringed as she raised the boy's hand who ao'nung was making fun of earlier, their father stepped in " look, look" he held his hand up, "i was born as a sky people, but now I'm Na'vi ,you can adapt." He let out an exhale "we will adapt, okay?" His statement clearly made a point, but then his wife said " my husband was toruk makto! He led our clans to victory against the sky people '' though her words were said with defense, toruk makto looked at her in retaliation, ronal's voice spiked up after that " you call this victory? Hiding among strangers? It seems eywa has turned her back on you, chosen one" i reeled back when the other woman hissed at Ronal and the tsahik did hold back either. I shared a look with tonowari, we both knew this was going too far, so he stepped in, holding a conversation with the man, i didn't hear the rest as my eyes focused on the little girl who stood with her family, while everyone was busy raising their voices, i waved at her smiling and and she waved back, taking a step away i knelt down to her height, she came forward her smile as bright as the daylight " hii, I'm y/n, what is your name little one?" She giggled and said "I'm tuktirey but you can call me tuk" but before i could respond her mother called her back, her eyes lingered on me, i backed away as i did not want to cause a scene.

Soon tonowari and Ronal accepted them, while ao'nung and tsireya were given the task to train the omaticayan kids, i was introduced to them by Ronal , walking beside tsireya with a basket of fruits and fishes in my hand as we showed them the way towards their mauri, tuk was bouncing on the pathway smiling in her own little world, neytiri and Jake , which i found out to be their names, walked behind us, i stopped in front of the empty mauri that faced a beautiful section of the sea, letting the couple enter i heard Jake say "this is nice? Yeah?" Followed by a sickening thump when neytiri let the mats in her arms fall down, i quickly put down the basket, ushering tsireya out with me to give the family some alone time to adjust to the new surroundings.

»»————-　✼　————-««

It's been a few days after the sully's arrived, tsireya and ao'nung were teaching their kids, i sat in the open common patch, where all the kids shuffled and talked, i taught the metkayina kids the sign language, so when they get into water one day for longer period, their communication can be better, but not only was i their teacher, i was the clan garment weaver as well, as the noise of the children got louder , i shushed them all, their doe eyes wide when they were caught, i was about to start talking when i saw movement behind the kids, Ronal, neytiri and tuk walked towards me, i got up warning the seated kids to behave i walked to them.

"Y/n, ma tsmuke, i need you to add another pupil to your class" ronal said putting a gentle hand on tuk's shoulder, the girl looked at me with the same sunshine smile, i smiled back holding out my hand for her , she happily took it, i nodded at Ronal, giving me a small smile like she knew something i didn't, she left, i shook that out of my head and looked at neytiri " don't worry, tuk will be safe here, I'm happy you decided to put her in my care" she nodded giving me a curt thank you and told me Jake would came take tuk after the class before leaving, i picked up tuk in my arms and took her to introduce her to the class.

After hours of laughter and teaching them some signs they could fit and remember in their little brains, i waited for each and every parent to come pick their kid up, everyone left except tuk, who was now dozing off in my arms, Jake still hasn't come yet, it was getting dark now so i decided why now drop tuk off myself? Making my way to their pod, i knocked on the entrance circle, neytiri's head whipped towards me, i waved at her, motioning to a fast asleep tuk in my arms, lo'ak and kiri were in a corner discussing something but stopped when they saw me, neytiri stood up , standing infront of me she asked in a soft voice "didn't Jake come to take her?" I adjusted my hold on tuk as i said "no, he didn't, maybe he must have been stuck somewhere and couldn't come, but it's okay, it was no problem for me to bring her" and for the first time from the moment she has been here, i saw her smile, a real smile , with her head tilting to the side slightly, and in that second, she looked gorgeous but i stopped myself, what was i thinking ?she has a mate, mentally slapping myself i moved to hand tuk to her but this girl was not ready to leave my neck, i awkwardly looked at the woman in front of me but she took a step back motioning me to step in, not wasting any time i walked in, trying hard to gently lower tuk onto the hammock and not to wake her up, straightening up i turned to look at neytiri who sat near the fire again, i was about to bid my goodbyes but she started before me " we'll be happy if you could stay with us for dinner, that is if you want to and thank you for bringing tuk back" i was seconds away from refusing but then thought about the lone dinner with no one to talk to back at my own mauri, atleast I'll not be so lonely tonight and agreed.

Jake was surprised to see me when he got back but before he could say anything, Neytiri talked his ears off about not going to pick up tuk and that I had to carry her all the way. I did not get in between , I valued my life more. Neteyam sat by my side, giving me a sheepish smile at their bickering parents, neytiri huffed at him, throwing her hands up at her mate's excuses, she made her way over to my side sitting down and serving me the food, Jake sat in front of me giving me an apologetic smile, i just chuckled under my breath at his tries to please neytiri.

The dinner with them was one of the best I had in years. Tuk woke up in the middle of it and no one was happier to see me in this world than she was. Immediately she sat with me, giving my introduction to everyone. Especially to her sister kiri, who was talking to me earlier about how to weave seashell necklaces, as she was having some trouble with hers and i was more than happy to help her, neteyam and lo'ak were busy bombarding me with questions about the sign language, though i tried to answer them all but they had way more to learn. when the dinner was nearing the end and my time to go home came closer, something in my heart panged, it looked like Jake and neytiri felt the same but i could be wrong and it's just my thoughts, i hugged each of them, giving tuk the extra longest as i departed, both the adults lips were pressed in a thin line, even if no words were said, feelings were changed that night.

I laid in my hammock, staring at the ceiling of my pod, the time of dinner played again and again in my mind, did neytiri really brush her hand against my cheek during the dinner or was it nothing? Was Jake really staring at me all that time or was it just me? My mind was in chaos, I was falling for a mated pair , what is wrong with me? I groaned, turning on my stomach and buried my head into the pillow, i hated this feeling but then again loved it more than life itself.

»»————-　✼　————-««

It's been weeks after the dinner and now it's a regular occurrence, I'd drop tuk at their pod and stay for dinner like it was all normal while i died a little every time i saw them, the longing increasing more and more, right now i sat with neytiri as i taught her how to weave a seashell and pearl top, just when horns blared across Awa'atlu signaling the return of the tulkuns, the return of my spirit brother, i dropped all my work and grabbed neytiri's wrist tugging her along, i said in a hurried tone " come on, my spirit brother is here, i need you to meet him!" We met Jake on the way along, they dived in behind me, i connected my queue with an ilu bringing Jake behind me as neytiri bonded with another, my eyes roamed to see a familiar tattooed tulkun, meeting his eye i had to suppress a giddy giggle that was about to escape me, hugging his side i said " it's so nice to see you again brother, i have so much to tell you, and about someone i met, well two people to be exact but you get my point!?" I signed as fast as i could, his chuckle reverberated in the water, neytiri and Jake watched in fascination, i motioned them to come closer and they did, taking support of his fin, i introduced them to my spirit brother, while he side eyed me, giving a all knowing look, i just rolled my eyes at him.

Jake and neytiri were thrilled to Meet y/t/n, plus the Olo'eyktan announced a celebration in return of the tulkuns, i dressed in the best pieces i made, and helped Ronal, neytiri, kiri , tuk and tsireya get ready as well, tsireya being my baby i gave her the top i was working on, and it looked gorgeous on her, at least now the forest boy's attention would be all on her, but it's not that his attention wavers from her anyway. I smiled walking out of my pod, after getting everyone ready, I was now late for the celebration myself and no one even waited for me…..as usual, i sighed.

The celebration was at its peak, drinks were being passed, couples danced together near the fire it, i went near the drink stand, the liquor glinted in the fire light, i sat on a log that was tucked into a corner, enjoying the songs bobbing my head to the tune, but soon enough my eyes trained onto the couple who stood up from the crowd automatically, their azure skin reflecting the soft shades of oranges so beautifully, their bright honey eyes looked ablaze in the moment, neytiri's top, that i gave her, accentuated her looks even more, their smiles making my heart flutter, just then Jake caught me staring, giving him a hurried smile i looked down at my drink swirling it in the shell glass, this was now getting worse, if this didn't stop soon i knew I'd get hurt, i get up to go for a walk as my mind would not stop reeling back to them. as i was about to walk out a hand rested on my shoulder , i jumped turning back only to be met with a face i was yearning to see but was too afraid to, Jake smiled, it was like a warm trickle of light on my skin, and neytiri stood beside him, she came forward taking my hand in hers, at this point my heart was racing faster than a tsurak on hunt, Jake leaned forward grabbing my other hand and i looked at them wide eyes, mouth agape, is this really happening? Are they BOTH choosing me? But before getting the answers to my questions, lo'ak popped up and we all jumped apart, the boy stopped in his track, looking at his parents then as me, as both jake and neytiri held my hands, i immediately wringed my hands out of theirs, looking at lo'ak as heat rushed to my face , lo'ak raised an eyebrow at me and i chuckled nervously asking " what do you want lo'ak? Is there any problem?" He still looked skeptically between the three of us as he replied " yeah, i was looking for you , y/n, i wanted to ask how you made that armband for neteyam, i want one like that too" I sighed in relief ushering him to come with me, i looked behind that them, both of them having a sly smile that i knew the answers to all my questions were giving without uttering a word. The whole night after that was too hot even when the breeze was chilly.

»»————-　✼　————-««

I sat with all the sully's laughing at something Jake said, neytiri lightly hit Jake on his arm, tuk snuggled in my arms and lo'ak leaning on me, as i patted his head, neteyam sat with neytiri, and kiri's head rested on Jake's lap as she was napping, i was being consumed by this family and i had no problem with it at all, Jake looked at me, his ears up, tail swaying side to side and i blushed under his gaze, neytiri wasn't any less, there was something going on between us, even the kids could sense it but we haven't given this "situation" a name , yet, we all knew what we wanted but still kept quiet for some reason, by now i practically live with them, I'm at their house almost all the time, even at night now i slept in their pod, it felt more normal than sleeping in my own mauri.

Brushing kiri's hair, I applied the oil to her scalp, massaging it gently, pressing on the point to make it enjoyable and she quite literally melted beneath my hands "do you like it?" She let out a loud sigh and said " like it? This is the best massage I've ever gotten, from now on will you, please, always do my hair?" I laughed at her request " but your mom does a better work than me" , "noooooo, she's good but you do it different, please please please, don't tell mom though" we both giggled at it but in the end i agreed, just then neteyam walked in, he looked at us, raising an eyebrow at kiri is said " i thought only mom could do your hair, huh?" Kiri just huffed and replied " ohh yeah, just try it and then you'll understand bro, her massages are like no other" her eyes closing, clearly enjoying the massage, so neteyam did exactly what she said, pushing her out of the way he sat in front me, kiri exclaimed loudly at being pushed as well as being interrupted in her massage " HEY! It was my turn, get up you skxwang" neteyam just smirked at his sister not budging when she tried to push him, in the end i had to break the fight, promising kiri I'll give her more massages later, while neteyam sat smugly, it was funny seeing the siblings bicker but it was homely like this, i unbraided his hair, brushing them back and carefully applying the oils, he let out a long sigh as he leaned back a little, i smiled he was liking it and that's a good sign "kiri was so true for this, you really do it different, ah" after the massage i rebraided his hair nicely, matching the metkayina style and adding the beads of his choice, all the while have good chats, the time well spent after he was done, he went to flaunt it to lo'ak on who did his hair today, shaking my head, i got up , arms aching but still content they were happy, i walked into the sully tent, meeting Jake i sat beside him, exhausted leaning on him, he grabbed my hand, caressing his thumb over my knuckles "long day?" I shook my head "no, it was a fun day!" I said, smiling at him.

»»————-　✼　————-««

I sat roasting a fish on the fire, as Jake was cutting fruits and neytiri was taking out the plates to eat, the kids were out swimming and training with tsireya and ao'nung, i laughed as Jake tickled my side suddenly and neytiri grumbled "i dealt with this for 15 years, eywa know how" at that even jake bursted out laughing, but my laughter died down when i saw a very serious looking tonowari walking towards our mauri, Jake and tiri noticed as well, and what tonowari said next made goosebumps rise throughout my body.

The other clans were being tortured for information but due to one word from wari they haven't revealed Jake yet but everyone knew this won't last long, my appetite evaporating as i looked worried at neytiri, she just placed a hand on my shoulder, rubbing the spot for reassurance, i let out a breath , sending a prayer to eywa for our safety, we thanked tonowari, now thinking about what we're going to do next, but something in the back of my mind nagged at me that something's bad is going to happen….and i was not ready for it

»»————-　✼　————-««

I rode on a ilu, beside Jake and neytiri who were seated on Jake's tsurak, my heart shattering in a million pieces as Ronal wailed for her now dead spirit sister, her roa, who just bared her first babe, who also now layed dead by his mother, tears streamed my face, sobs wracked my body as the memories of Ronal showing me to her sister for the first time, this should not have happened, those demons did this, rage kindled in my chest but my sorrow was too great, i swam besides Ronal, who hugged me instantly, ohh how excited she was to show her newborn to her sister, they were going to be mother's together, now she'll never get the chance too, i held her close to me, this was not how it was supposed to be.

The clan screamed and shouted for revenge on the sky demons, they were killing our tulkuns, this will not go without consequence, i stood beside neytiri, my heart thumped inside it's cage, i grabbed her arm in fear, the people raging towards Jake, blaming him for all this, my heart panged for Jake, he hopped onto the elevated rock and spoke "listen, you have to tell the tulkuns, to go away, far away as possible" but Ronal hissed at him lunging forward, i had to get in between to stop her, she hissed again before saying "you live with us and still haven't learnt anything!" I cringed back but held my ground, looking back at Jake he said the next best thing he could think of, grabbing the red tracker he raised it above his head, showing it to everyone "tell your tulkuns, if this was attacked on them, then swim away fast! Tell me and I'll come deactivate it" everyone looked unconvinced and i shouted at them to get them moving " go, move, tell every tulkun you come across, now!" They grabbed their weapons and dived into the waters, i knew a war was brewing deep in the sea, everything weighed on me, my knees gave out and Jake caught me, i held onto him for dear life, neytiri came closer hugging us both and i melted between them, and for the first time after whatever this is between us started neytiri kissed me, on the lips, i was surprised but kissed back in seconds, as we pulled back Jake groaned "heyy i wanted the first kiss with her!" Neytiri just smirked and said "looks like you lost, ma' Jake" with that she kissed me again but Jake got in between, this time he kissed me and i couldn't be more happier, we still stood in the communal tent, but none of us cared one bit, i leaned on both of them as their arms enveloped me, my mind going silent as no unwanted thoughts plagued my mind for now.

I packed my bags for later, they both asked me to come live with them and i couldn't be more happier, the smile that started from the kiss still lingered on my face, i was shaken out of my thoughts when tsireya burst into my mauri, tears ran down her cheeks and she barely stuttered the words out " it's lo'ak, he's going to tell payakan, come we have to go with him" dropping everything i sprinted with her towards the shore, we swam towards the three brothers rock, where neteyam, lo'ak , tuk, ao'nung and rotxo were pulling out the tracker from payakan, my eyes widened at the scene, "ohh no, no no no" they were targeting payakan, i looked around to see any sign of the sky demons, relieved when none in the sight i got onto payakan's fin, and helped tug the tracker out, and as if lo'ak saw me for the first time he shouted even if he was seated beside me "mama, what are you doing here?!" And my work stopped as I looked at him, wide eyed, did he just call me mama? If i wasn't fighting to save this tulkuns life I'd probably hug him and cry but right now all i did was "yes, listen to me lo'ak, call your parents right now, we do not have much time, the hunters will be here any minute" he nodded not even registering the fact that he called mama, i got back in pulling the tracker, finally after so many tries that piece of metal was pulled out, just when the demon ship rounded the corner.

I took the tracker from neteyam, yelling at them to scatter as i got onto my ilu, swimming away, i look back and some kind of ships following , i threw the tracker away rounding about when one of the ships caught my ilu's fin and i was thrown over, i wanted to scream but stopped, trying to swim away but the other ship was catching up to me, just as i thought i was caught my wrist was pulled, taking my whole body with it, lo'ak smile down at me as tsireya pulled me closer onto the ilu, the ships still chased us, weaving into the long seaweeds, the machines got stuck, leaving our ilu we swam towards plant that created an air pocket inside it, when i broke to water surface, i was surprised to see tuk there, gasping for air i held tuk against me, we calmed down, catching up on air, we had to get out of here soon, so taking in a deep breath we got out, swimming towards the seaweed but our path was blocked as some of the weird shaped machine shot out a net trap, that captured me, tsireya and tuk, lo'ak got out somehow but held on to the net as we were pulled out of the water, tuk latched onto me crying in my neck, my brain was distrort on what was happening but i held on.

The net was thrown onto the ship, our bodies hitting the hard metal with a thud, i groaned , the net was opened and someone ripped tuk out of my arms as i screamed and thrashed to get her back, fear gripping my heart, another one of the soldier wrapped his hand around the nape of my neck, pressing my cheek on the cold metal, my wrists were cuffed behind my back, right after i was dragged to the railing and strapped to it, even after tugging it hard it wouldn't budge, lo'ak was on my left, tsireya beside him while tuk was on my right, fat tears rolled down her face, i tried to comfort her but couldn't do much. To my surprise one of the men grabbed my face making me look at him, he leaned down and tuk screamed " MAMA!! Leave her alone, please" the demon Na'vi who held my face, tilted his head and said in a low voice " looks like sully got himself another blue bitch" he chuckled and so did the others, lo'ak bared his teeth at him, tsireya and tuk crying out when a brut pulled at their queues. The demon who held my face shoved me and lo'ak hissed at him, but the man ripped the transmitter from lo'ak's neck, speaking into it " Jake, tell your friends to stand down. If you want your kids and wife back, you come out alone. You know better than to test my resolve" he points a gun at my head " I took you under my wing, Jake. You betrayed me. You killed your own. Good men, good women. I will not hesitate to execute your bitch" my breath wavered, eyes jumping from him to lo'ak, fear evident in his eyes, i couldn't catch what Jake said but i prayed he would take a good decision rather than a hasty one.

I looked at the horizon, plenty of Na'vi floated on the water and saw Jake coming closer, my heart dropped, he was giving himself up, i tried to pull away but the demon hold my queue yanked me back and a scream erupted from my throat at the pain, i inhaled deeply praying to eywa for his safety, absorbed in my thoughts i didn't see payakan coming up, the splash of cold water brought me out of my prayers, payakan fell on the ships deck, slapping of several sky demons with is fin while crushing many of them beneath him, lo'ak whooped for him, celebrating in the moment, payakan slid down from the edge falling back into the water, but before i could say anything the ship started to move forward picking up speed, it didn't stop even when we approached a rock Island, the collision shook the whole ship as we were lifted up into the air, slamming down my head hit the railing, hard, my vision blurred for a moment and pain bloomed at the back of my head but i didn't say anything, looking around frantically, i saw tuk pressed against the cold deck, tsireya holding onto the bars for dear life and lo'ak trying to get a grip on the rod, sitting up straight, i saw neteyam bolting up onto the ship, running towards us he cuts up tuk's binds, then tsireya's and mine, lastly lo'ak's, i pull tuk to my chest, standing up, i lost my balance but straighten up quickly, pulling tuk and tsireya with me, i look back at neteyam and lo'ak who didn't follow me " c'mon we have to get out of here" lo'ak hesitated but said " we have to save spider, we can't leave him here" neteyam looked conflicted, sighing, i had to get tuk to safety and as far away as possible, so i spoke " be careful please, if you do not find him, turn around, okay? I do not want you two to get hurt, am I clear?" They both nodded quickly running to the hallway.

I swam with tuk and tsireya when the latter stopped me, her voice barely above a whisper "y/n, you are bleeding" i shushed her, nodding, it wasn't much, i just had to get through this, it can be taken care of later, we met kiri inbetween, i heaved a sigh of relief hugging her, but there was no time , just as we started to swim in the other direction, a roar boomed above us, two big talons grabbed kiri, pulling her up as she screamed for the rider to let go but to no avail, they took her to the ship, tuk pulled my hand, i looked at her, she signed towards the ships pulling me "baby we can't go there" , my mind frantic, i had to save kiri life but i can't risk tuk's as well, she shook her head " sully's stick together" so we swam to the ship.

we popped above the water and hauled ourselves up, crawling around until we saw kiri bound to the railing of a pool, we ran towards her, trying our best to free her but we were too late as the demon walked towards us, he pushed tsireya into the pool, i screamed but as quickly as i blinked he shoved me down and his men bound me and tuk besides kiri, tuk wailed " i can't believe I'm tied up again!" He looked at his soldiers, huffing he said "we can still get this done" and one of them replied with a "hell yeah" and We waited for a long time with bated breath,before the man who held a gun at me earlier spoke " Did you hear me corporal , same deal as before, you for them" he was talking to Jake, i knew it, he walked around us "I need the answers Jake or there's gonna be consequences" i couldn't hear anything what Jake replied with , i sighed inwardly, exhaustion was creeping in but i fought it, the blue demon walked towards his attendees "Let's get this guy, that's what we came here for" clicking his gun ready.

he walked towards us, pointing the gun out, he looked through the lens for a couple of seconds before he said " hold fire" they all looked around here and there searching for Jake, by the look on the sky demons face i knew he lost sight of him too, he swirled around and spoke into the mic after a while "Talk to me corporal, the ship's going down and your girls with it, only one way to keep 'em safe" a few minutes of silence before a blast was heard, the ship groaned at the explosion, tillting down, people were screaming and running everywhere, minute by minute people were being killed, then like a ray of hope i heard Jake's voice, but the demon crouched in front of us to trap Jake, i screamed at the man in front of me " THEY'RE COMING FOR YOU!" and tuk hissed at him.

I heard neytiri's screams from a distance, my head turned in that direction, heart dropping to the floor but before i could react, a hand clamped on my mouth as he undid my cuff from the railing, pulling me back against the metal wall so we couldn't be seen, i tried to scream but they were muffled by the hand on my mouth, he leaned down to my ear and whispered " one more sound out of you mouth and your pretty little lover won't be alive" i stopped thrashing against him as he held a knife to my throat, i saw Jake rescuing tuk and kiri, he pushed me forward , walking into Jake's eyesight, knife still held against my neck, Jake and tuk walked forward but he stopped tuk as she cried "mamaa" Jake put out his arm, he looked between me and the man who held me " kill him Jake" the demon pressed the knife even harder drawing in blood as i recoiled, " c'mon sully, weapons down" quatrich threw a orange band at him " cuff yourself, Do IT!"

Jake grunted, he threw his axe and gun away , bending down to pick up the band, " you son of bitch" Jake bit back, "not one step corporal" my blood coated the knife now, burning the place where it rested against my neck, tuk and kiri were behind Jake, and i didn't not see neytiri come up behind us and so didn't quaritch, she pounced out gripping a boy holding a knife against his throat, "you think i care about that boy? We're not even the same species" quaritch said, she tilted her head, lips pressed into a thin like as she spoke " a son for a son" dragged the blade up, plummeting it down towards the boy's chest with a yell, quaritch screamed "No, NOo" taking the knife from my neck and holding it up, i yelled at the sensation, letting me go Jake pulled me behind him, neytiri let go of the boy and hissed viciously, she towards us and tuk pulled her back gently, we all backed away slowly.

the ship still sank down second by second, quaritch stayed back but called out to Jake " I'm coming back for you, when i do, I'll kill you and your whole family" baring his teeth, Jake stopped in his track looking at back at quaritch "let's get this over with" and he pounced on to quaritch, i propelled forward to stop him but neytiri pulled me back, shaking her head, we dived into the water, swimming away but there was an oil spill and it caught on fire due to the blast, making us stop in our way out, the human boy from earlier, spider, yelled to turn around towards the ship, neytiri grabbed my arm as we swam back, getting onto the ship, i pushed kiri forward to go ahead of me, neytiri was with tuk, i turned back to her, i went to grab tuk but her foot slipped and she fell into the doorway, my heart lurked and i went in after her, neytiri right behind me.

I fell onto my side the water cushioning my fall a little but i didn't care, i grabbed tuk and neytiri was there beside me, i ushered tuk to go forward , we ran to the door in front, neytiri tried to open it, water was trickled our calfs, finally after a hard pull she opened it, the water pumping us forward, our yells and shouts muffled by the water, we got into a room with lots of tables, the ship was turning so we had to climb up them, i pulled tuk up by her hand, pushing her up to neytiri, we got to a closed door again, water up to our waist now, neytiri struggled to open it, i stood beside her and pulled the door with her, with all my might, finally the door gave away, quickly letting tuk in, me and neytiri swam in after her and the door slammed shut with the pressure.

i looked ahead but there was no other way, water was filling up, neytiri pulled me and tuk closer to her and we stood there, the wound was throbbing and being tossed around while coming here was taking a toll on me now, my head felt light, vision blurred, my hand latching onto neytiri's, she looked at me worried but i couldn't even explain what was happening, tuk answered for me " she hit her head on the bars, when we were on the ship, there was blood coming out too" now neytiri was worried sick, i shook my head trying to change the subject " it's okay, I'm fine, it was nothing" but she looked skeptical, there was nothing she could do either, there was no way out , i leaned on her " stay close to me please" time passed agonizingly slow, the pain in the back of my head now slowly spreading down my back and arms, water levels were rising fast, the ship sinking down faster, we were trapped and there was no way of getting out.

i looked at neytiri, all hopes of my survival leaving and i said those words before it's too late "ne- neytiri, this is not how i wanted to say it but ole ngati kameie, i see you and Jake, I've never known love before you two came in my life, you were the ember in my darkness, the light that led me to meet you, if this is the time we get in this lifetime, then all my hardships were worth it, you both were my light in the darkness that lead me to love you, if this is the only time I'll get to spend with you, than, would not hesitate to do it all over again " i smiled at her, tears spilled down her face , she placed a hand on my cheek wiping my own tears with her thumb, tuk wrapped her arms around my torso " you're going to be okay mama, i want you with me" new tears formed in my eyes, i leaned down kissing her forehead, neytiri spoke after a while " you're going to be fine yawne, we'll get out of this and you will live with us, do not lose hope now when we are so close, ole ngati kameie ma' y/n but please do not leave me, not now" she pressed her forehead against mine, i savored this moment, feeling every bit of it, exhaustion made its way but i fought back.

the water was now till our necks, i tried my best to keep tuk afloat as well, it was getting harder to breath, the lights went out a while ago, it was pitch black, so when a golden light flooded the place we all turned to the source of it, golden fishes swam in the water we stood in and then popped in kiri's head, i laughed in relief pulling her in for a hug, oh I've never been happier, we are going to be saved at last, she pulled back, taking the air giving creature off her back and put it on my back, connecting my queue to it, and surely air rushed to my lungs, i nodded, they all took a deep breath and Kiri lead us out, neytiri held my hand all the time while the other was in tuk's, after weaving through doors and passages we finally got out, seeing the surface both neytiri and kiri pulled me up and we all broke the surface and i gasped for air, i looked around and saw payakan, with Jake and lo'ak on his fin, we all swam to them, more like neytiri dragged me to them " ma' Jake - ma' Jake!" We both said in sync and he pulled us for a hug, i was hauled onto payakan's fin, and finally i let myself go, as i lost my fight against exhaustion, my head falling onto Jake's shoulder, eyes rolling to the back of my head, i pass of completely.

»»————-　✼　————-««

I open my eyes but the blinding bright sunlight stopped me, squinting, i looked around me, neytiri sat beside me and i looked up at her, memories of war flashed through my mind, me, neytiri and tuk being stuck, kiri coming to save us, me passing out on payakan and i bolted upwards, sitting up but the pain in my back took over and i cried out, neytiri immediately held me close, i didn't even notice Jake until was was beside me as well, checking on my bandages, my breathe uneven and labored, everything felt like it was on fire, every nerve in my body ablaze, i sighed in her neck, getting a grip on myself i leaned back, meeting their faces that held the brightest smile I've ever seen, i laughed lightly, then they started laughing and in the end we all laughed together, at what? I don't know, but I'm glad the great mother deemed me worthy to hear it again.

The celebration was full blown at its highest note, people danced in the joy of our victory, elders sang the most treasured songs in the name of another achievement, my heart swelled as i saw tsireya and lo'ak dancing together, i sat with Jake and neytiri, in between them while they both crush me beneath their body weight, as the party progressed, Jake took us both out for a walk, it's been a week since the war, we mourned the fallen now we must move past it, celebrate a new phase, i walked on the crunchy sand, the moonlight illuminating the bioluminescent dots on our bodies, Jake's tail wrapped around my thigh, while neytiri held my hand in her's, fingers intertwined, we got to a grassy part of Awa'atlu, where the sea was still visible, it was where the forest met the sea, the plants and surroundings glowing, it looked magnificent, we sat down on the soft grass, the silence comfortable as we laid there, under the blanket of stars, but it was disturbed when Jake and neytiri sat up, i looked at them confused, they helped me sit up and Jake cleared his throat and i stared at him " umm i know, this is long over due now, hmm i- will you-" but neytiri completed the sentence for him "will you do the honour and make us happy by agreeing to be our mate, tiyawn?" Jake nodded hurriedly, blood rushed to my face as it heated, not much as it was already hot whenever I was with them, i nodded smiling " yes, i loved to be" right after i said it, they attacked me with a hug as we fell down again on the grass, both of them peppering my face and neck with kisses as i giggled between them, soon Jake brought his queue in front of him, and so did neytiri joining hers, my mind literally dancing i brought mine coiling around both of theirs, the tides of emotions washed over me, as i looked at them mesmerized, their love for me wafting over to my side, seconds later i was huddled in their arms, warm and protected, this is all i ever wanted and that's all i got, i didn't know how much time went by at the celebration but as i saw the first rays of sunlight illuminating the dark sky, i knew this was eywa's way of telling me that this was it, this was my share of the love and i couldn't be more happy about it.

A/n : i finished writing this at 2am in the morning, it's still not proofread so bare with me please, I'll proof read it soon 🫡😊🤭 i hope y'all like it, share your views.

Yawne : @fanboyluvr, @callmeoncette, @lu-the-ghost-reader, @brisbriskett, @saltedcoffeescotch, @ducks118, @itscheybaby, @jackiehollanderr, @zoetrope1997, @yeosxxx, @persefolli, @im-in-a-pansexual-panik, @theycallmesia, @killua2dot0, @ilovechickenwings, @kylobensgirl, @darling-imobsessed, @majathepapaya, @sweetirilly.

©Neteyamyawne2023 | All Rights Reserved. Do not repost on other platforms, copy, steal, or translate any of my works!

[gavisuntiedboot]

I'm genuinely wondering how you write so much and enjoy it bc I just wrote 1,8k words and I am fucking done for tonight

I've been getting a couple annoying asks such as "You never update" or "You don't write requests"

Like wtf, this isn't my job, I'm not getting paid to do any of this shit

Anyways I'm just ranting rn but Part 7 was fucking amazing as per usual like I'm still processing all of it

Feel to rant to me whenever y'all!! It can be really hard to hold all this stuff in, and IDK about everyone else, but it's not easy to talk to your real life people about your work on tumblr.

Like I have said a lot of times, I literally have daydreamed about the plot of JP for months, and have little post it notes and scraps of papers with the plot and ideas for the characters littering my room. I published 4k words in the first part when I hadn't ever written before. I actually wrote part 2 (almost 3k words) the same night because I was so excited, so jut write things you love! Ignore anything that doesn't inspire you.

I honestly have a couple of things that help me write super long pieces. The first thing is that I have a rlly cute desk mechanical keyboard that clicks when I type, so it motivates me to write. I also dedicate several continuous hours to write. Like I just let myself be completely immersed in it. I also never write these long-ass parts in one night. I usually write about 5k-7k words in one sitting. College has helped me practice sitting and writing for long periods of time, but I also just go on and on and on when I write or speak, so like what other people say in 100 words I say in like 250.

Writing creatively is really really hard, and so you should be proud of yourself for everything you can get out of your brain and onto a computer/ paper. At the end of the day, write little bits of things you love, and the length will follow (if that's what you want!! Long writing is not the be all end all!!!)

Love ur work so so so much!! Can't wait to see what you put out in your own time from your own creativity <<<333

[ochrearia]

Dude 1,000 words in 30 minutes is so fucking dangerous this may actually end up being 4k-6k words long for one fucking one shot at the pace I am going what is wrong with me. "insane fluff" marked prompt too powerful bc wtf is going on here

Maybe my crayon is magic

[candont]

Caught the 4K re-release of Brotherhod of the Wolf which I hadn’t seen since it was originally in theaters.  And now my family tells me I’m not allowed to pick movies for us to see anymore.

In fairness I did describe it to them as I remembered it a French kung fu monster movie with a political courtly intrigue driven plot.  But in actuality it a pulpy boy’s adventure playing dress up as high gloss historical epic while throwing in a kitchen sink of influences from aforementioned creature features, kung fu flicks, Robert Louis Stevenson, Fenimore Cooper by way of Michael Mann, The Road Warrior and anime among others.  It’s over stuffed and feels like a today version would be some multi episode streaming series that I would hate because it would take itself so dreadfully seriously instead of giddily bouncing from one ridiculous bit to the next.  My family on the other hand describe it as a too long french movie with dated CGI about not a wolf (and why did that guy have to hide his arm for the whole movie anyway?).

I suspect the movie does want to take itself seriously. And it would probably be dreadful to take it at its own word.  Besides a a WTF french revolution story wrapper there’s the reversal of innocent peasants our heroes save from bad guy soldiers who turn into good guys at the end of the movie saving the main character from the peasants revealed to be evil henchmen.  Yes the villains are all aristocrats but the good guys work for the king or the pope.   And the less said about the nice white couple riding off into the sunset to untamed Africa the better.  But between its kitchen sink tonal shifts, high gloss costume polish and laughable servings of cheese cake via Monica Bellucci and Mark Dacascos (by the way why didn’t Mark ever become a bigger star?) I can’t help but be entertained.

My family at least enjoys repeatedly telling me how bad they thought this movie was.

[userlando]

assumptions || sebastian stan

Summary: You’re vacationing with your friends in Romania and whilst clubbing, you meet a guy who you assume only speaks Romanian. Turns out, you’re completely wrong. Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, partying. A/N: This has been in the making for like five days but I really just love this concept. Dedicated to the love of my life (and pain in the ass) @babylevines. One month of friendship, hooray! Also, please excuse the incorrect Romanian language, I used Google translate so it might not be correct. I speak four languages but Romanian is not one of them, so if someone who’s fluent in the language wants to correct me then feel free to do so <3 xo

Constanța. The beautiful coastal town continued to surprise you, no matter how reluctant you were to take this trip in the first place. Your friends had booked a hotel room in a swanky neighborhood, overlooking a gorgeous beach and it was refreshing to wake up to a view that beautiful.

Lately you had been overworking yourself, almost driving yourself into a wall and drowning in work; Anything to get your mind off of the fact that the people closest to you were getting married left and right, getting pregnant and moving on with their lives. It wasn’t that you were miserable, you liked your life and the steady pace it was taking, but there was something missing.

So when one of your best friends - Liv - had gotten engaged, it didn’t take long for you to fall into the black hole of self-pity when she insisted on planning the wedding with you. The misery didn’t end there though, because a few months later and she’d booked a trip to Romania with the whole group of friends. If anyone even tried to back out, she’d hit you with the glare. You only knew this because you’d tried to make excuses, knowing where she was going with this trip.

You had been here for two days now and you were enjoying yourself, even though Liv continued to point out every decent looking guy who happened to look your way. It never stopped, she even went as far as to try to hook you up with a bartender that worked at your hotel.

And now? Now you were sitting on your bed, dressed in nothing but your underwear and make-up overdone, looking around as the four girls ran around and dodged each other, getting ready for a night out. It was amusing to see, and you busied yourself with pretending to be in a reality show.

“Y/N!” Liv snapped her manicured fingers in front of you, and you blinked. “Come on, get dressed because the taxi will be here in ten minutes.”

With a sigh, you heaved yourself up from the comfort of your bed, scowling when Liv gave you a triumphant grin. She thrusted rumpled, black fabric into your hands and you stared defiantly at it.

“Do I have to?” You asked, trying to ignore how whiny you sounded. Liv nodded. “Isn’t my skirt and tank enough?”

Liv brought a hand up, pinching the bridge of her nose - A habit she’d picked up since early childhood. It reminded you of her mom, who used to do the same whenever she caught the two of you in some mischief.

“Look, we’re all in dresses and you’re gonna stick out like a sore thumb. No one is even planning on buying our drinks tonight, people are gonna buy it for us.”

You gritted your teeth at the comment, opting to just do as you were told and put on the dress. The fabric was flimsy as you stared at it, but you found it to look expensive as you pulled it on, lifting the straps over your shoulders. It hugged your every curve and you tried not to feel exposed as you adjusted your cleavage, eyebrows pulling into a frown when the girls in the room whistled and hollered.

“You look amazing!” Your friend yelled from across the room and you flipped her off, lips pulling into a grin as she laughed.

The club was packed and stuffy, sweaty bodies moving along to the heavy beat of the music. It was some sort of techno and really not your style, but it was heavy enough to almost make you feel drunk in the tight space. The club itself was an open area with no roof, two bars on either side of the dance floor and a flight of stairs leading to an open area where you could take a seat and look out over the dance floor.

You held onto Liv’s hand as the six of you paraded through the club, trying not to slip on your heels as she dragged you along to the stairs. A gust of wind blew past as you climbed higher up, finding your booth in the back that the girls’ had apparently booked beforehand. Drinks were already being set up by the workers and Liv tipped them before you all took your seats.

The girls were chattering excitedly over the music, but you could barely hear anything so you settled for watching their mouths move, nodding with a stiff smile as if you could understand them. You grabbed a glass filled with something frosty-looking, anything to distract yourself from the unease you felt crawling up your back.

It wasn’t long before you’d downed three of those tall drinks, head feeling fuzzy as you fell into conversation with your friends, laughing at things that weren’t even that funny. You felt good though, body warm and happiness radiating by the time you all climbed down the stairs, ready to dance.

The night wore on, the steady techno beats being switched out to sultry and heavy R&B songs that you immediately started dancing along to, grabbing onto Liv’s hands as she swayed in front of you, mouthing the lyrics. You paid no attention to the sweaty bodies amongst you, not until you felt a pair of hands touch your waist. It wasn’t a grab, just a touch that had you spin around, hands in front of you.

A pair of blue eyes were watching you, lips pulled into an apologetic smile and you couldn’t help but slow down your dancing; Entranced with the way his lips were moving and the magical swoop of his dark hair. It took you a while to realize that he was talking to you.

“What?” You yelled out over the music, nose scrunching as you waved with your hands to show him that it was too loud. “I can’t hear you.”

The handsome stranger’s eyes slid over your face and you watched as the skin by the corners of his eyes crinkled as he smiled. It took your breath away, and you wondered briefly if it was because of you being under the influence of alcohol or if it was the heady smell of his cologne and sweat. Maybe it was both.

The man bent forward, lips brushing against your ear and you couldn’t help but lean forward as his beard tickled you, hands automatically grabbing onto his shoulders - and wow, he was well built. It wasn’t hard to tell because the dress shirt he was wearing was sitting snug against his upper body, hugging his arms like it was a second skin.

“Imi pare rau,” The gust of his breath tickled your ear as he spoke. “N-am vrut să te sperii.”

I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.

You laughed breathlessly, not understanding a word but the way the foreign words were tumbling out of his lips made you want to squeeze your legs together.

“I’m - I’m sorry, I’m not from around here. I don’t really know any Romanian.” You pulled back to give him a sheepish smile, but he smiled as if he could understand you. “Do you know any English? English?”

He frowned, shaking his head as if he had a hard time understanding you and you sighed in defeat. Of course, the only attractive guy that seemed to be interested in you turned out to be in a completely foreign country with absolutely no knowledge of the language you could communicate in. As you stood there brooding in the middle of the dance floor, the handsome stranger reached out to touch your arm, the pads of his fingers running over the skin of your naked arm. Goosebumps pebbled your skin and he seemed to notice because he locked eyes with you, perfect eyebrows rising as he stared you down.

“Dans?” He asked loudly enough for you to hear, and you nodded with a smile. That word, you did know.

He stepped forward hesitantly as if he didn’t want to impose on your personal space but you decided that tonight, you’d throw caution to the wind and stop listening to your brain. Your arms reached up to lock around his neck, forcing him to step forward until your chests were touching. His eyebrows shot up in surprise but he seemed to quickly recover, pink lips pulling into a sly smile as he circled his muscular arms around your waist, hands touching the skin of your back as he spanned them. In your muddled mind, you made a mental note to thank the girls for forcing you to wear the dress with the scandalous open back, feeling drunker than you probably should as the man’s hands touched you.

The music changed, morphing into something much heavier and you couldn’t help but grin at the way the universe was slowly getting on your side, starting to move along to the beat and pressing yourself closer to the stranger. The smell of him was intoxicating and the way he was looking down at you made you feel weak in the knees.

He was a great dancer, body moving smoothly to the side as he slotted himself to you perfectly, like two pieces of a puzzle. His hands stroked your back, one of them wandering to your hip to grab it and you looked away as you let your fingers slide through the back of his hair, messing up his perfectly styled hair in the process but he pushed himself closer to you, sighing into your ear so you counted that as a win.

You felt drunk with his warmth, closing your eyes as he skimmed his lips against your neck, breathing you in as your bodies moved as one. The music was loud in the club, louder than usual but you still caught the whispered words against your neck, breaking into goosebumps as his scruff scratched your skin.

“Frumos..” He whispered and you didn’t know what that meant, but it sounded heavenly coming from his gorgeous mouth.

As the song slid to its end, you seemed to be sobering up a bit as you pulled back enough to look around; Trying to spot your friends. They were nowhere to be seen and you figured they’d probably retreated to the booth. You looked back at the handsome stranger, breath stuttering as you found him already looking at you, eyes blue and intense.

“Um, do you want a drink?” You asked, leaning forward so he could hear you. It was fruitless, he didn’t even speak English but you still tried. “Drink?”

You mimicked drinking and the man smiled, showing off his perfectly white teeth. He nodded and you grabbed his hand, dragging him along to the stairs. It took some effort because you were still feeling lightheaded from all the dancing, drinking and being in the close proximity of his intoxicating stranger. And not to mention, the heels were absolutely killing your feet.

The gang was sitting where you expected them to sit, this time joined by three other guys that looked equally as handsome. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes when Liv looked up, spotting you holding the stranger’s hand. The girls were giving you curious looks, almost looking envious and you refrained from sticking out your tongue in a mocking fashion. You didn’t though, because you had no idea why this handsome man, who looked like he’d walked straight out of a fashion magazine, would even pay you any attention.

You sat down in the booth, grinning when the man plopped down beside you, sitting closer than one normally would. He slung an arm around the back rest, hand resting on your naked shoulder as he smirked at you.

“So, um... What’s your poison?” You asked lamely, gesturing to the table.

He followed your gaze, looking perplexed before his mouth formed into an ‘o’ in understanding. You watched, almost as if in a trance, wondering how he’d react if you leaned forward and kissed the hell out of him.

You watched in silence as he leaned forward, grabbing two clean glasses before pouring some rum into them. He handed you one, which you took with a smile, and then he proceeded to lean back.

“So...” You paused, not really knowing what to say. “What’s your name?”

“Name?” He replied, as if he was tasting the word. “Ah, nume? Sebastian.”

You hummed, happy to finally put a name to that face. It fit him, he really did look like a Sebastian.

“Tu?” He asked curiously and you couldn’t help but smile when he pointed at you. The urge to throw caution to the wind and climb into his lap recklessly was getting stronger the longer you stared at him. He didn’t look like any other guy you’d ever met before, and you would’ve usually transform into a stuttering mess if it weren’t for Sebastian speaking nothing but Romanian.

“Y/N,” You answered when you’d pulled out of your little daze, blushing when you realized that he was studying your face intently; As if he wanted to take in every mole, scar and imperfection of your face.

You turned your head down, teeth sinking into your lips as you swirled your drink around with the pick.

“Minunat.” He said over the music and you wondered for a second how the hell you could hear him so clearly. A quick glance up confirmed your suspicions that he’d leaned in even closer, so close that you could smell his heady cologne.

Very beautiful.

You were getting frustrated over the fact that you couldn’t understand a word he said. And if you’d known that you’d meet an outrageously handsome man on this trip, then you would have made an effort to learn some basic Romanian. Anything to have a conversation with him that didn’t end up with either of you frowning in confusion.

A tapping on your shoulder made you look to the side, and you realized that it was Liv who was trying to get your attention. You gave her a puzzled look and she leaned in so she could talk in your ear.

“He’s hot! Climb him.” She yelled and your eyes widened in mortification that maybe he’d hear her, but then you remembered that he didn’t even understand her.

“He doesn’t even speak English, I don’t even know how to communicate with him.” You sounded miserable even to your own ears. “I’ve wanted to kiss him since I laid my eyes on him.”

Liv giggled, covering her mouth with her hand before wiggling her perfectly plucked eyebrows in your direction.

“Then do it? It’s not like he’s gonna say no, he hasn’t stopped staring at you since the both of you sat down.” She said with a shrug and leaned back to engage in conversation with the others.

She had a point. You turned to look at Sebastian, feeling a spark of confusion as you found him gazing back at you with a teasing smile playing on his lips. The very lips you wanted to press yours against.

You frowned, thinking that you must be drunker than you thought because you were turning into a hormonal mess. It was embarrassing.

“Okay?” He asked, as if to check if you were doing fine.

You sighed, balling your hand that wasn’t holding the drink into a fist before releasing it.

“Look, I know you don’t speak English and you probably won’t understand me but that’s fine,” You paused, realizing you were rambling when he raised his eyebrows at you. “My friends are insisting on me getting laid and frankly, it’s getting tiring to hear it. So, what do you say?”

You didn’t know what the hell you were thinking, he didn’t understand you. Somehow it made you feel relieved because honestly, you were proposing sex to a complete stranger that you’d met only an hour ago. But something told you to not let this man go.

Sebastian moved the arm he’d slung around, hand spanning over your naked shoulder so he could bring you closer to him. You went easily, breath stuttering when he brought his other hand up to your knee, fingers wrapping around your meaty thigh before moving up, nudging the material of the dress. His white teeth sunk into his lower lip as he gazed, and in the darkness of the club, he almost looked drunk. As drunk as you felt. But he didn’t look drunk on alcohol, he looked drunk on something else.

You didn’t realize that you were holding your breath until he neared your face, anticipating a kiss but he was quick to press his lips close to your ear, teeth nudging your lobe. Shivers went down your spine and you felt him squeeze your thigh, his fingers almost bruising your inner thigh in a very delicious manner.

“How can I say no to that when you asked so nicely?” His voice sounded smug and you almost sank into his warmth when it registered what he’d actually said.

What he had said in English. With perfect English, no broken words, no accent tinging his low voice. You pulled back, shock written all over your face as you stared him down. He was smirking, eyes shining with mirth and you didn’t know if you wanted to kiss him or slap him for playing you.

“You’re? You’re English?” You asked, astonishment clear in your voice.

“Yes I am, prinţesă.” He replied with a nod, smirk transforming into a breath taking smile. You didn’t know how to react, eyes wide as you stared at him in shock and mortification.

Everything you’d said to him, he had understood. He had heard you venting to Liv and that’s why he had smiled, because he knew what you two were talking about. Sebastian was fluent in English, and suddenly you felt heat creep up your neck and blood rush in your ears, drowning out the loud music.

“You lied to me!” You cried out, feeling stunned and slight betrayed.

Sebastian’s eyebrows shot up and he pulled back to look at your face. He must’ve seen the million emotions flickering in your eyes because the corners of his lips tightened.

“To be fair, you assumed that I didn’t know the language and you were being too cute so I decided to play along. You know... See where it takes me.” He explained, and you let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding in. “Hey, look I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you’d offer yourself up like that.”

Your mouth dropped open at his words and his face split into a teasing grin. You couldn’t help but slap his arm, resisting the urge to laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation.

“You’re an ass.” You bit out with no real malice to it, making him laugh while leaning forward.

A faint squeeze around your thighs made you freeze up a little bit, realizing that his hand was still curled protectively around the flesh. He seemed to notice what you were looking at, quickly uncurling his fingers to loosen his grasp but your hands shot out before you could stop yourself; Placing them over his rough hand. You looked up and met his eyes, not knowing if your mind was playing tricks on you or if his eyes actually looked darker. More heated.

“So, how come you’re here?” You asked, voice hoarse but clear enough to hear over the sound of the music. “In Romania I mean?”

Sebastian’s eyes made a quick sweep over the upper floor, almost as if he was taking in the people and the atmosphere before turning to look at you.

“I’m a New Yorker but I have family here. Was born here myself.” He said with a shrug, shooting you a charming smile your way that you couldn’t help but reciprocate.

He was absolutely gorgeous, it wasn’t hard to notice that about him.

“So you know your way around here?” You raised your eyebrows, hoping he’d catch on to what you were implying.

Judging by the look in his eyes and the smirk, he’d caught on faster than you could blink.

“Of course I do,” He nodded, leaning so close that your eyes almost went cross-eyed. This man wasn’t playing around. “There’s a beach not far from here, if you want to check it out? It’s quite beautiful.”

You studied his face for a few seconds before nodding.

After assuring your friends that you’d be in good hands and that he’d return you home safely, Sebastian proceeded to guide you out of the club. His hand was clasped tightly in yours as he gently pulled you along, mindful of your tall shoes that you were struggling to walk in. Your feet were starting to ache from all the previous dancing and in your hazy mind, you had to work hard to not double over and fall flat on your face.

Sebastian talked about memories he had from this town and you listened intently, smiling when he’d point out different spots from his childhood that meant a lot to him. He then went on to ask about yourself, interest glowing in his eyes as he nodded along to whatever you were saying.

Eventually, the two of you got quiet as you walked along the sidewalk hand in hand. The breeze was warm against your skin, and you were so focused on the beautiful buildings surrounding you that you squeaked embarrassingly high when he suddenly pulled you by the hand he was holding, making you crash right into his chest. He huffed out a delighted laugh, spinning you around so he could trap you between the stonewall and his body.

“Can I kiss you?” He murmured quietly in question, eyes hooded as he hovered over you, lips pulled into a half-smile.

A smile stretched your lips as you snuck your arms around him, letting him fit right against your body before tilting your head upwards to catch his mouth with yours. He breathed in deeply through his nose as soon as your lips touched, pressing against you before deepening the kiss. You went easily, feeling your fingers dig into his shoulder blades as the kiss gradually turned filthier and filthier.

He smoothly placed his thigh right between your legs, your dress riding up in the process as he cupped your cheek with one hand, pulling you even closer if possible with the other placed on your lover back. His beard was scratching your face, rubbing it raw but it didn’t bother you one bit - it only seemed to spur you on even further.

The both of you eventually pulled away, panting heavily as he rested his forehead against yours. His eyelashes were resting against the apples of his cheeks as he fluttered his eyes shut, and you couldn’t stop staring at him, heart thudding heavily in your chest.

“Wow, that was something else, iubi.” He pecked your lips sweetly one more time before pulling back completely.

You were feeling dazed, having to lean against the concrete of the wall to keep yourself from swaying like a lovestruck idiot. Sebastian grinned at you, mouth looking deliciously pink and raw as he bit into them. You watched as he stepped forward again to pull your dress down and smoothen it, crooking a strand of hair behind your ear before holding his hand out for you to take.

“You good to walk for another block?” He asked and you grimaced.

“I think so? Wait,” You paused and placed one hand on his shoulder before bending your leg so you could unclasp your heel.

Sebastian let out a laugh, “Let me do it, hold on.”

You set your foot down, watching in stunned silence as he went down on his knees in the middle of the street to help you unclasp your shoes. You held onto his shoulders as you stepped out of the first shoe, and then the other; Sighing when the soles of your aching feet felt the coolness of the concrete.

Sebastian made a pleased sound in his throat and leaned forward to press a small kiss to the inside of your knee before standing up straight again. You bit back a smile when he reached for your hand again, opting to wrap yourself around his arm, hugging it closely to you.

“Thank you.” You murmured quietly, as if to not disturb the peaceful quiet in the air.

In response, he turned his head to press a small kiss to the side of your head.

You walked for a few more minutes, Sebastian filling in the silence every now and then before you reached the beach. It was almost deserted, only a few people on the far other side of the beach and it was dark by the shore. The lights from the streets helped you as the both of you wandered down to the shore where the waves were crashing.

“This is gorgeous.” You sighed out in awe, looking down at the white sand where your feet were buried. “And the sand... Wow.”

Sebastian laughed from behind you, getting rid of his shoes and socks before joining you right by the edge of the shore. The way he’d folded his jeans was adorable and you couldn’t help but smile.

“Never get tired of it.” He said, eyes gazing out over the ocean before landing on you. You gave him a smile. “Want to dip your legs?”

You gave him a shrug, nodding before he took the both of your hands in his. He guided you into the water, humming to a familiar tune as the cold water his your naked legs.

“It’s not that cold, darling.” He laughed and you narrowed your eyes at him.

“Why don’t you be the judge then?” You gave him a teasing smile and you saw as confusion fell over his face, eyebrows pulling into a frown.

Before he had time to open his mouth and ask what the hell you were talking about, you’d let go of his hands and gave him a hard shove. If it weren’t for him being completely taken aback, he’d never have moved with the upper body strength that he possessed. But you watched gleefully as he fell into the water with a splash, laugh erupting from your mouth as he resurfaced; Gasping and shivering from the cold.

You didn’t have time to gloat too much, because a few seconds later and he had grabbed your legs, pulling so the sand disappeared from underneath you. A scream left your lips as you fell into the water, gasping as you wiped your face from water so you could shoot Sebastian a glare. He was cackling, head thrown back and giving you a nice view of his throat.

“Your face.” He let out a small laugh, sounding out of breath as scooted closer to you. “That was amazing.”

You slapped the surface, sending water flying right over his face and he let out and indigenous, drawn out ‘hey’. He wiped water from his eyes, pouting in your direction and you couldn’t help but giggle.

“You deserved that.” You huffed, wiping under your eyes because you were sure that you looked like a raccoon with all the make up you had on from before.

Sebastian watched you with a smile, wading further towards you until your chests were pressed together. And before you could say another word, he’d leaned in and pressed a kiss to your lips.

Tags: @babylevines @timemngmtoptimisationproblems @ssweet-empowerment @lxdyred @mizz-kraziii @justhappydays @lisq @funnylau

Message me to be added/removed to my taglist! <3

[atlabeth]

i only have two moods with my tvd fic apparently and they are "not thinking about it for months and wondering if it's actually going to go anywhere" and "writing 5 chapters at a time in a fervor and it's the only thing im able to think of" and i am in the second one right now and it sure is a time

[ssuckitlosers]

cannot quite believe that it’s 2:40am because I was fully expecting to go to sleep before midnight because I was tired af all day…

But apparently writing far too many words about a PrUK fic idea, will not only keep me awake, but make me lose track of time entirely.

[sillyrabbit81]

hiiiii👋🏻👋🏻 i’ve read your condition part 1 and 2 and i so love the concept of Sy owning up to his responsibilities and if you want i have a prompt more or less with another scenario

what if Sy meets the reader when she’s pregnant with another man’s baby but he isn’t in the picture and Sy falls in love with her and tells her that he wants to be the baby’s father?

♥️♥️♥️♥️

Summary: You start dating Sy when you are pregnant with your ex boyfriends baby.

Pairing: Captain Syverson x Pregnant Female Reader

Word Count: approx 4k (WTF?)

Warnings: Fluff, slight angst, smut, p in v sex, oral sex (male and female receiving), mention of abortion.

Authors Note: Thanks @ohmygoodie (I can't tag you for some reason!) for the prompt! I was intrigued and played around with it and found that I actually liked the story. So here you go, I hope you enjoy it.

Thanks to @amberangel112 for her Beta reading. I think I made her read this one four times so thank you for that!

Masterlist

Unexpected

You met Sy when you were four months pregnant. You went to a friend’s small dinner party at her house, he was a friend of her boyfriend’s. You were both the only singles, so you were sat together. He was sweet and polite and very attractive with his enticing combination of southern charm and mischief. He flirted with you, nothing serious, just enough to make your cheeks heat a few times, but mostly he made you laugh. You liked him straight away, but when you went home you pushed him from your mind. Now was not the time to get involved with another man.

You were surprised when a few days later you got a call from your friend saying Sy wanted your number and was it ok to give it to him. A million thoughts ran through your mind, mostly telling you it was a bad idea to start dating someone new. But a small part of you remembered the way he made you feel and how much you enjoyed his company.

“He knows I’m pregnant right?” you asked your friend. “I’m sure I told him.”

“Yeah, he knows,” she said. “Apparently he doesn’t mind. He says you were the first girl he enjoyed talking to in a long time.”

“Does he regularly date pregnant women? Like, does he have a fetish or something?”

Your friend laughed, “I asked the same question. I was assured he doesn’t.”

You nibbled on your lip. You did like him. If you weren’t pregnant, would you say yes? If you were honest, you would have asked him for his number yourself if you hadn’t been pregnant. But you were. You almost said no, but on a whim, you thought, fuck it, what harm could it do? You were already knocked up to a guy who didn’t ever want to see you again, how much worse could this guy hurt you? “Ok, give him my number.”

You got a call from Sy the next day, he was quick and to the point, asking you to go out with him that weekend. “But why?” you asked. “I mean, I’m pregnant.”

“I like you,” Sy said simply. “I don’t like a lot of people.”

“Oh,” you said. You hadn’t quite expected that answer, you liked his straightforwardness though. You hoped that meant he didn’t play games, that he may be one of the few honest men left in the world. Give him a chance a small part of your brain urged.

“Alright,” you said, a little reluctantly.

“Yeah? That’s great.” You giggled at his obvious relief. You sorted out the plans for the weekend and chatted briefly, mostly polite small talk, before hanging up.

You found yourself walking around with a huge smile on your face for the rest of the week. You hadn’t felt cheerful and more like your pre-pregnant self in months. People at work noticed, most seemed happy for you, they knew what a tough time you had been having.

When Friday night arrived, you got dressed in a loose dress. Your jeans were too small now as was most of your wardrobe, but you had been holding off buying new clothes, so you made do with what you had. You didn’t want to spend too much money knowing that as a single mother, things would be tough, and you were saving as much money as you could.

By the time Sy arrived you were nervous. You had convinced yourself he wasn’t going to show up, no man in his right mind wanted to date a woman pregnant with another man’s baby. But he did and when he smiled and hugged you in greeting, you felt much of your worries fall away. His arms held you firmly, not too tight, but not too loose, his body was pleasantly warm, and he smelled like freshly mowed grass.

Sy took you bowling, which you raised your eyebrows at. Clearly, he hadn’t heard that pregnant woman they shouldn’t be lifting heavy things. You didn’t say anything about it, just picked the lightest ball possible and on your first bowl you stood at the line and did your best.

“Have you ever bowled before?” Sy asked as you waited for your ball to return.

“Sure,” you replied.

“Do you want me to show you how to do it right?”

You suppressed a grin, and said, “I can’t do it that way at the moment.” You pressed your dress flat to your small protruding belly and said, “Pregnant remember?”

Sy’s cheeks coloured, and he ran a hand over his short hair. “Fuck. Ya shoulda said somethin’,” he said, he seemed a little annoyed too.

“It’s ok,” you said, smiling at him to reassure him you weren’t upset. “I can still do it. I’ll just have to do it my way. If you don’t mind me looking ridiculous while I bowl that is.”

“You look fine, Darlin’,” Sy said, returning your smile. “I’m the idiot.”

You had fun that night, laughed more than you expected to, and felt more comfortable as the evening wore on. After bowling, Sy took you for an ice-cream, and you took a walk in the park as you ate. You laughed as Sy ate his, he was a mess, the swiftly melting gelato kept getting stuck in his beard despite how careful he was.

“You missed a bit,” you said, pointing to the side of his mouth, he kept wiping it and missing. Giggling, you grabbed the napkin from his hand and cleaned him up yourself.

Sy put his arms around you and asked, “All clean now?”

Nodding you looked away, it was the first time Sy had touched you since he hugged you at your door. You knew what he wanted to do, but you hesitated. You liked him, you got along well, but you still weren’t sure if you really wanted a new relationship.

But Sy didn’t try to kiss you, he just held you. After a few moments you closed the small distance between you and rested your head against him, breathing in his fresh herbaceous scent. You felt his chest rumble with a hum, and he tightened his hug. It felt nice being in his arms, safe, secure. Neither of you seemed to want to moment to end, so you stood there embracing until someone on a bike rang their bell to pass you.

Taking your hand in his Sy said, “Come on Sugar, let’s get you home.”

It wasn’t until your third date when Sy finally asked the question. “Tell me about him.” He didn’t specify who “him” was, but he hardly needed to. You knew the question would come up eventually. So, you told him briefly about your ex, leaving out the worst parts.

“When I told him I was pregnant, he told me to get rid of it. I refused and he said I had to choose him or the baby, and here we are,” you shrugged and glanced at Sy. He was staring into the distance, his lips pulled into his mouth a moment before he released them.

Sy grunted, then said, “So, he ain’t comin’ back?”

“I haven’t heard from him,” you replied.

Sy nodded then looked at you. He gave you a small grin and put his arm around your shoulder. You felt a little better, now that question was dealt with, perhaps it would help bring you two closer together.

It was later that night that you first kissed. You asked Sy if he wanted to come in after taking you home. You made him a coffee and sat on the sofa, drinking it while he told you some funny stories from his early days training and what crazy shit drill sergeants made them do. You laughed so hard at one of his stories, you almost spilt your coffee, Sy quickly grabbed the cup out of your hands as you held your belly.

“Stop! Stop, no more, my face hurts,” you giggled.

Sy reached over and held your cheeks in his hands, and his grin slowly faded. Yours did too as you closed your eyes, and his warm fingers caressed your skin. His lips were soft as they brushed yours, while his beard pricked at your skin. You whimpered at his unexpected tenderness as he gently sucked your bottom lip. Reaching out, your arms encircled his neck, drawing him closer. Your lips parted as his tongue licked at them and your kiss deepened. He pushed you back onto against the arm of the sofa and he covered you with his body, carefully making sure to support most of his weight with his arms.

It felt so good for a while your forgot everything, swept away by a passion you weren’t ready for. You hadn’t been kissed like Sy kissed you in years, if ever. His mouth was commanding, firm and yet he was sweet. Even when he bit your lip, there was a softness that surprised you. He wasn’t quiet either, little grunts and groans told you what he liked, he even chuckled a few times, pulling away to look at you and smile before resuming his kiss.

Over the next month your dates became less about going out, and more about spending time together. You were six months pregnant and started to get tired easily. Sy started coming over and have dinner with you or watch a movie. There was always kissing, you always wanted to kiss him, but you were frustrated that he didn’t seem to want more.

One night while you watched a movie together, curled up next to him with your head on his shoulder and his arm around yours, you let your hand wander. You had occasionally slipped your hand under his shirt as he had with you, but that day as your fingers twirled the hair on his chest, you followed its path down to his pants. You didn’t stop, sliding down over his jeans you let your hand slide down between his legs.

Sy let out a groan and he gripped your shoulder, his fingers dug deep into your flesh as he widened his legs. You took that as the obvious invitation it was and started to undo the buttons of his pants. Slowly his boxers were revealed, and you saw the thick outline of his hardening cock. You sucked in a breath as you saw him twitch beneath the fabric. With curious and tentative fingers, you slid them over his length, eyes widening as you saw just how big he was.

“Shit,” Sy muttered, his hips gave a small jerk as if to press himself into your hand. You hadn’t even touched him really and his reaction was intense. You pulled his underwear away from his body and his cock sprang free.

“Fuck,” you whispered taking in the sight of him. You froze, unsure as you stared at him, overthinking and unsure of what to do. But desire edged out your nervousness and you wrapped your hand around his shaft, the silky skin taut over his pulsing muscle made you lick your lips. Leaning down and closing your eyes you let your tongue run over him. Encouraged by his groan and squeezing fingers, you did it again.

You opened your mouth and took him inside you, enjoying the feeling of your lips stretching around his girth as you met your hand. Sy swore again, his hips rolled as you applied a soft suction while your tongue continued to tease his length. He put a hand on the back of your head, fingers slipping into your hair, he gently guided your speed, slowing you down at first before encouraging you to go faster.

Through ragged breath Sy grunted, “You keep doing that Sugar and I’m gonna cum.” You clenched your thighs together, the excitement too much, your whole body tingled at the thought of making him cum. You hummed around his pulsing cock, increasing your efforts, letting him know you wanted it.

“Oh, fuckin’ hell…” Sy growled, and you felt him tense under you before you his cock thickened in your mouth. He held your head still as he filled you, his wordless guttural cry shocked you and you wondered if he always sounded like that when he came. Swallowing his salty but not unpleasant seed, you sat back up. Sy’s head was thrown back, his chest heaved, his skin was reddened and best of all was the blissful grin on his lips.

Opening an eye, Sy looked at you and still with some breathlessness he said, “Well that was unexpected.” You giggled as his smile widened. He shook his head, before he got off the couch, kneeling between your legs and kissed you. Unlike some of your ex-boyfriends he didn’t shy away from slipping his tongue into your mouth and knowing that he would taste himself on yours made your desire for him grow.

His thumbs hooked into your leggings, and Sy pulled away a moment, his eyes questioning. You nodded and he grinned, his eagerness obvious as his softening cock started to twitch again. He kissed you as he removed your pants then pushed your legs apart. His fingers danced up your thighs causing you to shiver, and he chuckled.

Sy groaned into your mouth as his hand cupped you, his palm pressing down over your clit, while his fingers slipped between your folds. “Fuck, your so wet, Sugar and your so fucking hot.” His words made you grind your hips against him, and you moaned as he slid inside your core. “Shit, you feel good. You’re gonna make me hard again.”

For the first time since finding out you were pregnant you felt sexual, wanted, and truly desired. Throwing your head back, you moaned as he lowered himself between your legs and his tongue flicked over your clit. Sy hummed as he swirled his tongue over your nub. “God damn, Sugar. You taste so good,” he rasped out, huskily. He didn’t speak again, clamping his mouth other you while his fingers danced inside you. He was so good, so attentive, you were as quick as he was to reach your peak and you heard him growl as you cried his name while you ground yourself against him.

He was hard again when you finished, and as he kissed you, he said, “I want to fuck you.” It sounded like both a demand and a plea.

“Please,” you said, desperately. Despite orgasming seconds ago, you still wanted more. “I want you too.”

Sy searched the jeans around his ankles, and finding his wallet, he pulled out a condom. He put it on quickly before kissing you again. You lifted his shirt, and he broke your kiss long enough to pull his off before he tugged at yours. Doubt invaded your mind and you shied away, not sure if you wanted to be naked in front of him.

Cupping your cheeks, he made you look into his eyes. “You don’t have to take it off, but Darlin’, believe me when I tell ya I think you’re beautiful and so fuckin’ hot.” You looked over his body and lifting your hand you ran it over his arm, taking in the firm definitions of his muscles, the hint of his veins that made his skin bump and the tan line that cut across his bicep. Biting your lip, you caressed the hair on his pecs, the coarse curls felt good under your fingers, and you followed the trail of hair down to his flat stomach.

Following the path of your hand with his eyes, Sy stayed still as you touched him. You traced over his hips and down the lines that lead to his legs. With a sigh, you dropped your hands. “No Sy, you’re beautiful. I’m just…”

“No,” Sy interrupted. “I’m tellin’ you I want you. I think you’re gorgeous, sexy and you make me horny as hell.”

You shook your head. “Sy…” you said breathless as his hands slipped under your shirt and up your sides. He kissed your neck while he pressed himself against your slit, his rigid length slid between your puffy petals and over your wet folds. Gasping at the sensation, your back arched, pushing your breasts into Sy’s hands. He pulled the cups of your bra down, and your yielding flesh, swollen by pregnancy spilled into his hands. Groaning into you neck Sy kneaded at your breasts, squeezing at your softness.

“Take your shirt off, Sugar,” he said in your ear, his tone harsh and gravelly. You nodded and he kissed you and chuckled triumphantly, “Fuck yeah.” Whipping your shirt off you giggled as Sy dove between your breast, kissing and sucking on them. He reached between you, lining himself up and slowly entered you.

You hissed as he filled you and Sy’s face pulled into a snarl as he gritted his teeth. Mumbling curses, he grabbed you by the back of the head, pressing his forehead into you. You held onto his shoulders, nails digging into him as he stretched you open. “Fuck, that feels good,” you said with a shuddering breath.

Sy’s mouth was on you, his kiss hungry and scorching as he started to move. He kept his hand on your head while he wrapped his other arm around your knee, opening you wider. His rhythm was hard, fast, but you could tell he was holding back. “More,” you begged.

“I don’t wanna hurtcha,” Sy grunted as sweat broke out on his forehead. He looked so good to you, sweaty, naked, raking you with his eyes.

“You won’t,” you said, moving with him, desperately seeking more fiction. “Please, Sy.”

“Fuck,” Sy snarled and gave in. You mewled, overwhelmed by his power and heedless thrusts and he pulled you tight to his chest. You kissed his furry pecs, relishing the salty taste of his hot humid flesh.

You began to tremble, muscles quivering as your orgasm grew close. You pawed at Sy, wanting to be closer, and though seemingly impossible, he tightened his hold, his arms squeezing you, “I gotcha Sugar,” he said.

Biting into his shoulder your climax hit you, and you went limp in his arms. Sy wasn’t far behind, and you cried out as he slammed into you, repeating the roar that seemed to come from somewhere primal, somewhere deep inside.

You flopped back on the sofa, while Sy pulled himself out, then laid his fevered head against your breasts. “Fuck,” he said.

You hummed and agreed with his sentiment. You don’t think you have ever been so convincingly and thoroughly fucked in your life. “Yeah. Fuck.”

For the next couple of months, you two went at it like rabbits any chance you got. You got bigger as your baby grew, but it didn’t appear to bother Sy who seemed to enjoy working out new positions to have sex in. He made you smile as he would say things like, “So, I read this article that suggested this position was good for keepin’ weight off your tummy.” You thought it was sweet, but also hot that he thought about things like that and made an effort to keep you and your baby safe.

But it wasn’t all sex. When you were first with Sy, it was as if he completely ignored that you were pregnant, but as time passed, he would ask you how your doctor visits went and seemed to be genuinely interested. Not long after having sex for the first time, he started spending nights at your place. One night, late in your pregnancy Sy was laying with his head on your shoulder when your baby started to move. You were surprised when he placed his hand over the fluttering movements, and you heard him chuckle.

“Lively little thing, ain’t he?” Sy said. “Does it ever hurt?”

“Occasionally, but most of the time it feels, not good exactly, but comforting.” You weren’t sure how much to share, but you went on anyway, “It’s like I’m never alone, but not in a bad way, in a nice way. I can’t wait to meet him, but at the same time, I already feel like I will miss having him in there.”

Sy was quiet for a while, following the baby’s movement with his hand. Eventually the baby stopped moving and so did Sy and the three of you fell asleep.

Sy seemed agitated the next morning, and leaving before breakfast, he said he would be back later that evening. You had stopped working, being so close to your due date and you wandered around the house worrying. You wondered what had made Sy seem so edgy, but you tried not to think about it. The raging hormones this late in the game made you crazy sometimes, emotional as hell and so you pottered around, washing the baby’s clothes and folding them neatly in his room.

That night when Sy came over, you knew immediately something wasn’t right. He had trimmed his beard, and his hair was freshly cut too. He was dressed a little differently, a bit nicer, some chinos and a button-down shirt, rather than his usual jeans and a t-shirt. You were confused as you let him in but as soon as you closed the door, he grabbed your hand and dropped to one knee.

Your breath caught in your throat, and the blood drained from your face. “No…” you breathed.

For a moment, Sy looked dejected, but he spoke firmly, “Just let me say what I wanna say.” He waited for you to nod before he continued. “Last night,” he breathed deeply, cleared his throat, and started again. “Last night when I was layin’ with you and you said you couldn’t wait to meet your baby, I realised that I can’t wait either. I know I have no right to feel this way, Sugar, but…” He shook his head and kept going, “But last night I wished with all my heart that was my baby.”

“Sy…” you said, but he put his hand up, gesturing for you to wait.

“I love you, Sugar and crazy as it is I love that baby too. I want him to be mine. I want both of you to be mine.” Your vision blurred, as his words caught you off guard, that was not quite what you had expected him to say. He pulled a small velvet box out of his pocket and letting go of your hand he opened it and inside was an antique ring with a small diamond. “I know it ain’t much, I’ll get ya a new one if you want. But this was my great-grandmothers, and my father gave it to my mother and, if you’ll have me, I wanna give it to you.”

You stared at him, speechless, tears flowing freely down your cheeks. Sy spoke quickly, “We don’t have to get married straight away, I’ll wait till you’re ready, but I needed you to know I was serious. I want to be your baby’s Daddy and I want to be your man. Fuck, don’t cry, Sugar.” He stood and pulled you into his arms, stroking your hair.

“I’m sorry,” you sobbed through your tears. You were overwhelmed, unprepared, unsure, and yet... And yet, you loved him and wanted everything he wanted too.

“I get it,” Sy said and although you could hear the disappointment in his voice, he didn’t let you go. “Look, just know that I…”

“I’m sorry I can’t stop crying,” you clarified. You looked up at Sy as his brows furrowed in confusion. “Ask me Sy,” you said softly.

With a cautious smile Sy got back on one knee. “Will ya marry me, Sugar?”

You grinned, nodded, and forcing the word to come out clearly despite your sniffles you said, “Yes.”

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[300iqprower]

So I was playing Elden Ring and just noticed how every boss is literally weakened by the passage of time. Is this a thing in all Fromsoft games? Elden Ring is the first one I've played and it's fascinating how Fromsoft made it a point to show bosses facing their end because they've been eroded by time.

Is that a thing mechanically? Like I know its open world so do the bosses you choose to do later get scaled down/dont scale to your new level to make it so the later you do a boss the weaker they are? If that's what you mean, no that is an Elden Ring thing.

If you mean lorewise, does the game show how these are ancient beings who are long past their prime and at best a hollow shell of what they once were pretending to be the legend described, oh yes that is very much a FromSoftware thing. And I dont know WHY IN GOD’S NAME I felt a need to systematically break down some examples, but I super did. So here we fcking go.  [BUT THATS YOUR TLDR: “YES.” WTF IS WRONG WITH ME THE REST OF THIS IS LIKE 4K WORDS. Oh and sorry in advance for the length before the break but it only lets ya put one Keep Reading i guess...]

Gonna put a spoiler break only later on for heavy spoilers. In the meanwhile there will be light spoilers for Dark Souls 1, 2, 3, and Bloodborne. There will be no Elden Ring or Sekiro spoilers in this post (albeit only cause I've avoided spoiling myself as much as possible on both lol)

Again, the answer is basically “yes.” Like, that is Fromsoft design 101. That has been the core philosophy of every final boss across Dark Souls, Demon's Souls, and Bloodborne. Hell, most bosses in the series in general. It's even a thing in Sekiro, albeit a lot of it is presented very differently (As far as I am anyways. See above.)

> Light spoilers for Bloodborne follow.

Father Gascoigne, the first mandatory boss of Bloodborne, sets the tone very well for this sort of thing. Hunters are very clearly supposed to be the ones who keep order and cull the insane and the beasts during the Night of the Hunt, and when you encounter the only named Hunter thus far it starts out exactly like that, finding a priest in a graveyard with the same weapons you start with, dressed similarly to the default Hunter's attire and hacking at a beast...except, it becomes immediately apparent that it’s already long dead, less a hunter killing prey and more a butcher obsessed with a carcass. Upon noticing you, a fellow hunter, he says “Beasts All Over The Shop…..You’ll be one of them….Sooner Or Later….”

before turning around and revealing he's blindfolded as he lets out a raspy, feral growl. ...And then halfway through the fight he turns into a fucking werewolf.

Yeah, despite being a Fromsoft game, Bloodborne is very quick to make clear what's going on in it. Between the insane mob of villagers, the werewolves running around, the giant roaring abomination that's supposedly a Cleric, and now the first fellow hunter you meet (one working for the Church that is supposed to be the governing authority no less) is as crazed as the beasts themselves and several times as deadly in his brutality, this is clearly a place that has gone to hell long ago, and Gascoigne already told you why: "Sooner or later, you'll be one of them too." Between Gascoigne turning into a beast moments after telling us we'll eventually be one ourselves, and the cryptic lines from our hub dream world about how this is all happened before and is a tradition that will continue, it's pretty clear Bloodborne is about ‘he who fights monsters’ in the most literal sense, and it demonstrates that by having you fight people who have been fighting monsters for far too long to hold onto who they were. This world where crusading hunters once took up arms to defend their home from a plague of beasts are now as bloodlusted as the beasts themselves, to the point where the second mandatory boss ALSO transforms from human to monster before our eyes.

It's really the DLC that goes all in on this idea though. without properly spoiling anything (this is all stuff that is literally in the official description and its CALLED The Old Hunters), names that you heard lauded as great heroes finally make their appearance proper...but as twisted and broken beings who bear no resemblance to their legends and every resemblance to the things they were meant to destroy.

> Light to moderate spoilers for DS3.

You know how Elden Ring does that thing at the start where it shows you all these long fallen characters you yourself will eventually encounter and stuff? Yeah that’s something of a staple of Fromsoftware, specifically what they did with DS1 and 3. While 1 is a lot more coy about it and waits til like the halfway point, though, 3 makes it clear it’s doing the same thing DS1 did right out the gate. “The world is dying, you’re gonna face these guys, and you’re gonna catch on quick they’re all mere shadows of the legends they’re meant to be, in fact we are literally telling you this in the intro.”

And much as I love taking any chance whatsoever to rave about how the best boss in the entire series is The Abyss Watchers, it’s actually everyone’s favorite DS3 meme Yhorm the Giant who takes it. He’s possibly the most built up of all the bosses: Last of the giants and their king, a being who can’t even be killed by the weapons of men, a descendant of a conqueror and a warriors king in his own right...now nothing but a mindless, burnt out husk quietly waiting for death on a subconscious level. He once wielded a greatshield but now two-hands his sword, having long since stopped acting as a ruler in the face of all he’s lost and becoming nothing more than a weapon. Long ago he would give the Storm Ruler, the giant-slaying sword, to those who did not trust him to rule as an act of honor; now it lies carelessly strewn alongside his throne, and Yhorm will attempt to crush you long before you reach it. His one friend Siegward joins you because he knew from the start Yhorm would be like this, and seeks to put the husk out of its misery, even if it costs him his life. Siegward makes clear he would rather die than let his once friend Yhorm spiral ever further into a decay that he is too great to be consumed by yet not great enough to escape, and that’s the entire point. Greatness is a curse, not a blessing. Immortal Life can do nothing to stop the world around you from succumbing to erosion and decay. Just as Yhorm awoke from kindling to find his people still suffered, just as his empire inevitably fell and left him alone, so too did the entire world begin to die as the fire faded ever further. Hollowing is inevitable, because you will always be powerless against entropy in the end. Yhorm knows this beyond any other Lord of Cinder. Whereas the others all went astray in their selfishness or simply went insane from corruption, Yhorm is the one who truly despaired and simply...gave up, on trying to hold onto what he was. His body persisted as a hollowed husk of a once incredible being, but the mind within it died in the face of an immutable reality. Even in gameplay he’s just a walking shell, one of the easiest boss fights in sosulborne history thanks to him having kept a weapon designed for killing him at his side; the Storm Ruler isn’t some measly damage buff against an enemy type, this thing kills him in like 5 hits. From the start you weren’t ‘fighting’ something that was meant to be fought, but to be put down.

> Moderate spoilers for DS1 (middle third of the game or so)

DS1 arguably has the most wide scale example of this, since the entire point of the game is that every major boss is a once great god gone astray, and you have an entire city demonstrating this. At the start of the game we’re shown all these incredible being of old, and it’s made out as if we’re watching legends who created the world give us context on our upcoming adventure. These beings are made out as distant entities so much greater than any of us, meant to be acted in the name of as we kill dragons and stuff. But then, around the third to halfway point, it becomes clear we’ll be fighting them ourselves, and these ‘distant almighty gods’ have fallen from their glory and become what are simply more monsters to be cut down. Nito the lord of the dead is least changed but acts entirely in self interest at this point, dwelling the dark catacombs after imposing the very concept of death onto the world and not caring the slightest for what came after, to the point that what truly weakens him is not Pinwheel’s fucking about, but rather the sheer energy he is putting out to impose the concept of death onto an ever more undead world. The Witch of Izalith? Where to start, how about the fact that in her hubris of thinking she could recreate the first flame, that as a being who had lost their glory she could simply recreate that glory, she turned herself into a horrid abomination and shit-tier boss fight? Because of COURSE that happened. How could you reclaim the height of your power when even at the height of your power you could not hold onto it? How about Seath? Oh the things to say about Seath, what can we call him? Cruel, Jealous, Spiteful, literally and figuratively jaded, insane, pathetic, but of all the things we can call him those things are not “glorious” or “immortal”. He became desperate for the immortality he supposedly “proved” he didnt need by killing his scaled brethren. From declaring he did not need his peers’ immortality, to going insane over his obsession with cloying at whatever possible escape from death there might be.

From Nito’s indifference to Izalith’s hubris to Seath’s madness, they are all fallen in their own way. All their attempts to hold onto their glory only serve to further remove them from it. So many millennia and the god of Death has only become weaker as the world dies. The Witch’s magic that is meant to bend chaos to its will could only damn its wielder in the face of nature’s course. The crystal dragon’s immortality is exactly that: crystal, the fruits of his cruelty and madness nothing more than a feeble crystal easily shattered.

But to loop it all back around, it��s the final bosses of the series who really hammer the theme of ‘faded glory’ home.

> Major spoilers for DS1, DS2, and Demon’s Souls to follow, starting with DS1.

First though....Hey remember that bit I casually dropped about an entire city? You arrive to Anor Londo, carried from desolate undead asylum or the dregs of Blighttown to a great golden city illuminated perpetually by the sunset, powerful knights and cleric giants all over the place, lightning and miracle using enemies whose powers are synonymous with Gwyn’s legacy, and at the end of that gauntlet are Ornstein and Smough in their golden armor and every bit tough and lively as their legends portray. Beyond them, you meet the beautiful Gwynevere who gives you the Lordsoul to truly start your quest for the gods in linking the flame. Even if the gods are all fallen or helpless on their own, we can at least see the legacy they created and hopefully spread through the land. We can at least bring this light back to the rest of the world, knowing it can still be sustained.

Except, that was a lie. It was all a fucking lie. 

A lie orchestrated by one feeble god desperate to maintain a literal illusion of his family’s grandeur. A god whose main tactic should you fight him is to run away forever in an endless hallway and blast you with magic because he’s otherwise powerless against a simple human. Should you find and successfully kill Gwyndolin, the magic he cast over the city fades, and we see Anor Londo for what it really is: Dark. The city of the gods, the capital of the Age of Fire that stands against the Dark, has itself gone Dark, and we can’t even begin to imagine for how long it’s been that way. The gods, their cities, their subjects, their champions, all of it is just a shadow cast so long ago that it doesn’t resemble that which cast it, and any evidence that their time hasn’t passed is just another lie you’ve been fed. (...Side note, watch this video I subconsciously almost quoted verbatim)

Thus enters the God who lived and died for that lie, unable to accept a reality in which he did not rule. Thus we meet Gwyn himself....or at least, what little is left of him. Because that guy the game has been building up as your ultimate challenge? That top god who by this point has Final Boss written all over him? That guy who STARTED all this crap and is basically Zeus the Dragon Butcher? Gwyn, Lord of Sunlight?

You don’t fight him. You fight a walking husk, and this time I mean that literally. Burnt inside and out with a body of charcoal and soul of ash. You fight one of the easiest bosses in the game, a boss the devs explicitly stated was designed to make sure any possible build would not struggle much with. You fight a guy who doesn’t have a single lightning attack. You fight Gwyn, Lord of Cinder. And by the next game, he doesn’t even have a name. The one who conquered the everlasting dragons and ushered humanity into their first age is barely a memory in Dark Souls 2, simply known as a distant sun god; his own miracles that were so crucial to his legacy don’t even acknowledge him. The one person we meet who remembers he properly existed regards Gwyn as a blind fool who did not save humanity, but damn it.  And by Dark Souls 3, Gwyn isn’t even his own being, he’s just one of many nameless souls to link the first flame. 

Once the most powerful of all gods and savior of humankind, now no more valued than the random undead schmuck you played as. Without a doubt the one you see fall the furthest in any Fromsoft game is Gwyn, and it’s exactly what he deserved. 

> Onto DS2

Because while Gwyn is the definitive example, he’s not the most extreme example; I’d argue that’s Vendrick. You might disagree since his fall was not as far, but what we saw of him WAS harsher than anything we saw of Gwyn. If not the most extreme, he’s certainly the most tragic, because unlike so many other cases of this in the series, Vendrick knew and accepted that this would happen to him. He’s one of a handful of figures across the series who embody the idea that, among all these legends, the ones truly worth being remembered for their glory are the ones who recognized they must eventually let go of said glory. 

What I mean by “what we saw” is...well, just like Gwyn, Vendrick is built up over the course of the game as the great king and conqueror who ruled over the world you’re travelling around, and while Gwyn is foreshadowed as the big bad, Vendrick is directly made out to be the final boss. You’re given a quest, you overcome trials, and it’s all directly in the name of reaching this ancient tyrannical being who as a mere man conquered giants and reigned dragons. And when you finally go through a gauntlet to reach him and break his seals...

...you’re met with a feeble, shriveled Hollow who can barely drag his sword. 

Gwyn at least gave the player a sense of who he was. He was a husk, and he was weak, but he put up a fight. He was waiting for you, undeniably himself in body if not mind, and commanding the first flame as his own with a blade wreathed in those flames. He stares you down as you enter and rushes you when you approach, his iconic theme playing as he silently lashes out at you. He was a husk, but he was never completely without dignity. Vendrick doesn’t have any of that. He’s hunched and aimlessly wandering his small chamber when you find him, not even attacking until you’ve hit him several times. He has no grand, iconic requiem accompanying his battle. Instead there is the scant few piano chords of a whisper filled dirge fading in and out, as faded as the empty being before your that has thrown away all but his blade and his crown. His robes, his precious ring, all of it cast aside, knowing the fate that awaited him would have no use for them. He’s nothing more visibly imposing than a giant version of the most basic hollows. His only unique abilities are the incredibly durability and raw strength, both of which he can longer wield effectively as one of the most predictable fights in the game; the same bait and strike tactic that works on any starting grunt works just as well on him. The closest thing to a unique attack he has is a single curse spell that represents everything he was trying to defy. 

Gwyn was a far cry of his once glorious self, but he was a proper final boss in atmosphere and presentation if not strength or challenge. There’s no comparison to Vendrick, who is downright unrecognizable and was never your true foe to begin with...just a poor hollow to be put out of its misery...

> But Wait There’s [one] More [thank god]! It’s finally Demon’s Souls time.

Demon’s Souls is very much the Proto-Dark Souls in a lot of ways and how it conveys its themes is no exception. The big thing about soulsborne games is how, as you said at the start of this essay, the things we fight have all been eroded by the passage of time. We don’t see what their true potential is. We never meet them in their full glory. We can only strike down what remains of that faded legend. Even when something like time travel gets involved with various DLCs, we fight things like the Burnt Ivory King and Artorias of the Abyss. Even in the past, the legends we face are already corrupted almost beyond recognition. You simply don’t get to see what their prime is, no matter how curious we may be, because that’s the whole point of the theme of fading glory: You can’t get that back. You can only accept that it’s gone. 

.....Old King Allant is a massive, blitz speed, Final Explosion-ing, soul sucking exception to this. 

Look at this. Look. At. This.  LOOK  AT  THIS  SHIT.

This is not a shell, this is not a husk, there is nothing faded about this Alabaster curb-stomper - he’s practically radiant. Whether he’s something exceptional in difficulty is up to debate, but what isn’t up for discussion is how he’s presented, because every. single. attack. of his radiates power. I’m talking, like, Vergil levels of  P O W E R. He’s got a winged aura of storm winds, he delays his windups only to then lunge forward at breakneck speed, just the way he draws sword to face you gives off raw “I’m going to fuck you up” energy - the sword in question being Soulbrandt, a blade that he never once let go of out of his infatuation with the way it grew in strength as his soul grew darker. He sends shockwave projectiles, not magic sword beams, pure shockwaves from how hard and fast he’s attacking. He almost never gets stunned compared to any other human, he has resistances against just about everything including the ability to shrug off any magic you throw at him, and his own magic is so powerful he can either one-shot explode you or steal your levels as he kills you. Above all else though, he’s brutal. He’ll attack relentlessly and swiftly, taking out anyone who’s relying on heal-tanking or fucking around to find out. There are various exploits as there always are, but for most players, regardless of difficulty he’s the one boss we all fear: The kind where there is no trick, you just have to git gud at learning his patterns and countering them. And that’s the main thing that stick with you, just like with Artorias or Maria or Ludwig or Gael or every single bloody Sekiro boss [and from what I’ve seen almost certainly Melania], there’s a swiftness, brutality, and efficiency that truly conveys the power of this legendary figure you’re up against.

Not bad for an illusion, eh?

Yeah I’ve ignored that bit long enough. Old King Allant, or to give his other name, the False King Allant, is truly worthy of being called a warrior king at the peak of his glory....because he was created to be that. The game’s final boss, King Allant XII, is not some alabaster tyrant who conquers dragons and command the demons. He is something even lower than Vendrick in its own way, a mass of mutated, inhuman flesh that pulses and can barely so much as reach out to you let alone strike you, unable to even wield the Soulbrandt fused with its lower carcass, still desperately clinging to it even as the power of the Old One has overwhelmed his physical form. He sought ever more glory, ever more certain his could never fade, and so unlike Gwyn who was puppeted or Vendrick who was hollowed, he became something not just less than human, but unrecognizable as human. We saw him in his glory, and while he retained the strength and power to make that zenith seemingly eternal, intent on and complacent with ruling from his dwelling with the Old One as a mere specter goes forth in his image, when confronted he is not powerful at all. He is, if anything, completely powerless.

Gwyn retained his visage and his dignity, but lost who he was, a burnt husk who possesses none of his own legacy and was doomed to ultimately be forgotten for the very reason of desperately holding onto his glory. Vendrick never ceased to represent that which he believed in, but lost his visage, his dignity, his kingdom, his mind, and his soul, ultimately left with nothing but the acceptance of his own inescapable fate.

Compared to the both of them, Allant is still the most on the nose, because unlike the rest we see that glorious legend. We meet it and fight it before we then deal with the reality of what is left of that same legend. Allant is not a once great, now faded light. He is a blazing pyre snuffed out right in front of our eyes. We go back to back from the peak of his tyrannical and power-mad glory, to a wretched and pathetic abomination pleading for mercy and understanding he does not deserve.

.................................................................................................................................... sigh

There. It’s done.

Ideally I would either now go into how Bloodborne does this amazingly as well with its final boss, but i don't want to spoil it. Not even tagged. Bloodborne has what might be my absolute favorite final boss in all video games, both because of themes discussed here and so many other merits, and I don't want to spoil it for anyone under any circumstance. I don’t care if it’s a 7 year old game (oh god my back), I won’t be the person to spoil that experience for anyone, invested or otherwise. Of course, I could go into the much more willing to spoil Lady Maria because just about EVERYONE knows about her, and from what I’ve seen of Elden Ring she might even have been a sort of “Proof of Concept” for Melania, or I could talk about how Maria is an inverse of this philosophy of “fading glory” and how she stands against the idea of holding onto such…

….but i think i already spent far too long on this, especially when for all i know you were in fact referring to a gameplay mechanic in which case this completely unsolicited WHY DID I WRITE THIS-