#this is so CRIMINAL

[anakinthinker]

cancelling the acolyte is a felony. whoever is responsible for the cancellation WILL pay.

[oh-katsuki]

gojoOOUGH

[hinamie]

post-graduation trip airport looks

[smokestarrules]

gotta say I am a huge sucker for how Adventure Time will sometimes just cut to Princess Bubblegum doing something extremely morally dubious like cutting off a tiny person’s limbs with scissors and then sticking those arms and legs onto another tiny person’s limb stumps but then she'll turn around and go like "Good morning, Finn! Are you ready for a sploinking day?" and whatever atrocities she had just been committing will Never be brought up again.

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

why aren't there more mysteries that take place in nursing homes & retirement communities. i want to watch a group of deranged retirees-cum-amateur-detectives combine their powers of:

decades of life experience

boredom-fueled busybody shamelessness

access to the most gossipy next-door-neighbors in existence

"I am too old to be arrested and/or give a shit" attitude

and solve crimes. this should be an enormous subgenre.

[magewritesstories]

just gonna leave this here

[chloesimaginationthings]

Vanessa TOTALLY got those Tapes for the FNAF lore..

[briefkittenearthquake]

I like my men smart

[sad-littletalker]

If Bruce is covering as Nightwing right now, who's acting as Batman in Gotham?

Tim: ok so any takers for the cowl?

*everyone looks at Jason as he is the second oldest*

Jason: oh no way. Absolutely not. Tim?

Tim: after evil gun Batman? ha. Nope. Plus DC doesn't pay much attention to me to make a good story about that.

Damian: may I-

Everyone: no.

Stephanie: OH I COULD BE PURPLE BATMAN!

Cassandra: I want to be Batman if Steph is my Robin

*everyone considers it*

Tim: that... isn't a bad idea actually. I like it.

[shadowhaert]

MY KINK IS KARMA LIVE BRIDGE

[wispscribbles]

you know the art you made of Soap "accidentally" giving Ghost a kiss before going on a mission? (before they started dating) what do you think happened when Soap came back from the mission? :3c

follow up to this post

They start dating of course! <3

[pastanest]

thinking abt being Spencer Reid’s controversially young gf (post-prison dilf era) and while he’s working a case he calls and is like,

“Dearest ray of sunshine, the heart of my life and reason for existing- Our unsub is gen-z and I urgently require your assistance. Please, what is rizz?”

[matthewsgreybubbles]

Sometimes "babygirl" is a 44-year-old man, and you have to accept that.

[fliesforeyes]

spencer that has the weakest pullout game and can’t help but cum inside reader cos she feels so good

it was the first time you and spencer reid had fucked without a condom. he didn't expect it to feel so different, so good, with you wrapped around him, nothing there to seperate the two of you.

he was deep inside you, hips pushing up against the backs of your thighs as he thrusts inside of you, the sound of skin hitting skin and your sopping pussy filled the room. but of course, that was drowned out by spencers moans, his whine, his curses, his whispers. his small,

"oh my god, you feel so good"

"youre so perfect like this"

"making me feel so good sweetheart"

"fuck, i love you so much,"

his voice cracked between words. you heard him so perfectly, with his head buried in your shoulder. your skin was wet with his spit, a result from the wet, sloppy kisses he'd place in the curve of your neck on a particularly good thrust, or after his quiet praises.

your fingers buried in his hair, the other holding onto the smooth of his back. one of spencers hands held him up, his other palm rested on your waist. his voice raised in pitch, moans breaking with desperate pleas.

"baby, please, please can i cum? can i cum inside you? oh my- fuck please let me cum in you please," he rambled almost senselessly, drunk on the feeling of you.

an excited, erratic nod of your head and your whispered, "yes, please yes spencer, please cum in me," were enough to set him over the edge.

spencer came hard, legs shaking as his hips stalled pressing against your own, breathing labored and heavy. he was sure to kiss 'thank yous' into your soft skin. it felt so dirty, but so good, it would be such a shame if this happened again.

and again, and again, and again.

[gublerie]

user gublerie on her hit tweet era lol

[radiance1]

Danny: Hey, I need you to be my boyfriend for a week.

Jason: What.

Danny: My parents are coming over and I've apparently accidentally talked about a partner more than once and only realized when they said they wanted to meet them.

Jason, currently still solidifying his power as a Crime Lord: Excuse me?

Danny: Let me get this out of the way, I do not consider you at all a person of romantical interest and a friend. But I need you to act as my partner for only a week until my parents go on their merry way over to my sister, okay?

Jason: Is there, quite literally, no one else to ask this?

Danny: You're my only friend who lives in Gotham, plus we share the same apartment.

Jason: That's almost sad.

Danny: You in?

Jason: Sure, why not.

===

Maddie: Danny, honey.

Danny: Yes mom?

Maddie: I don't mean to.... question, who you choose as your parent but. Well, me and your father was just wandering if he was a... [Maddie gestures with her hand] you know, one of those.

Danny, uncomprehendingly staring at his mother's hand: What.

Maddie: Oh dear, how do I bring this up. You know, one of those.

Danny: Mother I need more context.

Jack: If your boyfriend a crime lord!?

Maddie: Jack!

Jack: What? Beating around the bush wasn't helping!

Danny: Say WHAT?

===

Danny: Hey dude, thanks for helping with this even though you didn't need to!

Jason: No problem, I wasn't doing anything too [Crime Lord activities flash through his mind] important.

Danny: Can you believe my parents thought you were a crime lord though? Weird am I right?

Jason:

Danny: Jason. You are scaring me.

Jason: Haha, yea that's weird isn't it?

Danny: Jason.

Jason: Well, I have to leave now to attend to my totally real and totally not crime related job at the ice cream shop.

Danny: [Squints eyes]

Jason: [Internally sweating bullets]

Danny: Suuuuure, bring me back some ice cream though.

Jason: [Thumbs up and leaves]